#if he keeps surviving the he's going to take people with him

[envysparkler]

Haley's Circus visits Gotham when Bruce is 18. The Graysons fall, leaving their toddler an orphan, and the circusmaster whispers something about the Court of Owls before booking it out of Gotham and leaving baby Dickie behind.

Alfred takes in Dick and Bruce is all fired up to investigate this Court of Owls. He always knew there was something seedy about Gotham and he's determined to get to the bottom of this!

Featuring: baby Dickie as the most adorable little toddler; teenage!Bruce in full detective mode but without any training; the Rogues as a grad student support group that are mainly trying to survive higher education while keeping their precocious friend from ending up in a dumpster.

Harvey: so whose turn is it to follow Bruce this weekend?

Crane: I have an exam on Monday, not it.

Pamela: I need to be in the greenhouse this weekend.

Edward: if I have to watch him try to stalk Falcone one more time I'm going to scream.

Dickie: don't be sad! here, sticker!

Everyone: :coos:

Harvey: wait, why are we watching the toddler? where's Bruce?

Harley: oh, I saw Dickie in the trees hiding from some people in owl masks, so I grabbed him.

Harvey: ...but Halloween's not until October?

#fic ideas #oh harvey #you have no idea

[cobaltperun]

Lost (29) - I Walk the Line

Tara Carpenter x female Reader

Summary: To anyone on the outside, and to Tara’s friends, you were Tara’s fierce protector, the MMA fighter who’d take anyone on for Tara. The Guard Dog, as Amber called you. You had no idea you’d have to protect her from people who claimed they loved her. It didn’t matter. As long as you and Tara had one another there was nothing you wouldn’t be able to survive.

Story warnings: Scream violence, family issues, trauma, angst, certain sensitive topics

Word count: 4.8k

Story masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part (finale)

-You give me cause for love that I can't hide, for you I know I'd even try to turn the tide-

Tara woke up to the sound of crying and was about to get up, but she felt a hand on her shoulder as she rubbed sleep from her eyes.

“I got this,” you were already sitting up and making your way to the switch so you could turn it a bit. The dim light just bright enough for you to see where you were going lit the room and Tara stretched a bit as she watched you leaning over your children. “Hey buddy, what’s wrong?” you picked the boy up and rocked him slightly. You weren’t doing anything else, so it seemed like he just woke up. Zack calmed down a bit in your arms and Tara had to stifle a laugh at that, from the looks of it your children calmed down when you held them just like she did. “There we go, everything’s okay,” you said softly, offering him your finger so he could grab it and Tara felt like melting at the sight in front of her.

And then her eyes widened when she heard Susan crying as well. She got up, smiling at you when you shrugged a bit and picked up your daughter. “She’s missing her twin,” she smiled, rocking Susan in her arms.

“Well, they are twins,” you agreed and then feigned a sighed and Tara heard the reason why. “Well, better get the diaper,” you laughed, carrying Zack along with you as you went off to deal with the mess.

Tara looked down at Susan, the baby was calm once again, grabbing onto a few strands of Tara’s hair and just looking at her with those huge brown eyes. “Should I go and get a diaper ready for you as well, little miss?” she teased as the girl just tugged at her hair.

A few minutes later you came back with Zack just about ready to fall asleep in your arms, so you laid him back down on the bed and Tara did the same with Susan. The babies once again fell asleep, and Tara just leaned against you.

“Should I rock you to sleep as well?” you teased, kissing the side of her head, and wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

Tara grinned, smacking you on the stomach lightly. “Hush now, I don’t need rocking,” she laughed as quietly as she could to avoid waking the twins up.

You just went and lifted her up. “Yeah, you just need to be held,” you went over to her side of the bed and lowered her down. Tara wrapped her arm around your neck and pulled you down, kissing you deeply. You eagerly kissed her back, gently running your fingers through her hair while you pressed your other hand onto her pillow to support your weight.

“Oh, the things I’d do to you if I wasn’t sleepy,” Tara yawned a bit as you leaned down and kissed her neck a few times.

“Yeah?” you latched onto a particularly sensitive spot and bit lightly, prompting Tara to cover her mouth and muffle a moan. “Wanna fall asleep while I kiss your neck?” you blurted out and she just lost it, laughing way too loudly at that. It became a bit of a running joke ever since you fully recovered and every now and then one of you would bring that up.

You chuckled but tried to get her to stop laughing, or to at least keep it down. “Kids, Tara,” you tried, you really did, and she tried to get it under control as well, but it was too late, as mere moments later you heard loud crying, this time from both of your babies. “Well, up we go,” you separated from Tara and went back to the crib.

Tara, given that the damage was already done, took a moment to calm down from laughing too hard before getting up as well and took Zack from your arm so you could rock Susan easier.

~X~

The next day, around noon, Tara enjoyed peace and quiet with a cup of coffee next to her on the table, and Sam was just about to drop by. She was wrapped in blankets and just resting her eyes after washing the dishes when her phone buzzed. She glanced at it and saw it was just Sam saying she just parked outside, and soon enough Tara heard the front doors opening.

Tara sat up, untangling herself from the blankets and getting up to hug her sister. “Hey, I missed you,” she had just seen Sam last week, but that hardly mattered. She didn’t like being away from Sam for too long.

Sam just hugged her tightly. “I’m sorry, Tara, I just,” she paused and just took a deep breath instead of continuing.

Tara didn’t push, content to have her sister near and no longer fueled by anger. Sam was still struggling, but she was getting better.

“You look tired,” Sam noticed when she pulled back and looked at Tara.

Tara did, in fact, look tired, Zack and Susan kept waking each other up and they hadn’t even started teething yet. So, all things considered, neither you nor she had enough sleep during the night, still, she smiled brightly and looked toward the stairs where the bedroom was. “It’s worth every sleepless night,” she said softly.

Sam smiled at that. “I bet it is. Is Y/N upstairs with them?”

Tara nodded. You were upstairs, taking a nap with your kids and letting Tara take a break and spend some time with Sam. “She’s been amazing, Sam,” she said almost dreamily, and you were and Tara thought you were protective and gentle with her, but with your kids you took it to a whole new level.

Sam nodded. None of you really said it, but Sam still struggled to be around you, she still felt guilty for what happened even after you repeatedly told her to get over it. It really came down to the reason you somewhat forgave her, it wasn’t that you were okay with what happened, and Tara still didn’t know the extent of everything that happened between you and Sam. It was simply because Tara still wanted Sam to be a part of her life, so you, to keep Tara happy, moved on.

There wasn’t a doubt in any of your minds that if Sam wasn’t Tara’s sister that you wouldn’t keep in touch with her.

“I’m-“ Tara recognized the look on Sam’s face and placed her hand over Sam’s mouth.

“Don’t. I know, Y/N knows, it’s not fine, but I’d rather have you in my life than lose you over this,” Tara smiled slightly and nudged Sam’s shoulder. “Besides, my kids need an aunt,” even if Sam still wouldn’t hold them.

Sam sighed as the two of them went to the living room and sat down. “I still feel like my hands are too dirty to hold them,” Sam said, confirming Tara’s suspicion. “Maybe one day,” still, she left it at a maybe and Tara wasn’t about to argue. Sam needed time, and Tara would give it to her.

~X~

You woke up from your nap on your own, which was a welcome surprise. You blinked a few times, adjusting to the sunlight peaking through the window and saw the most beautiful sight you could possibly imagine. Tara was sitting on the other side of the bed, holding your children in her arms and singing softly as Zack and Susan gurgled and cooed at her.

You sat up slowly and your eyes met Tara’s as she kept singing, though a bit louder now that you were awake. You somewhat recognized the nursery rhyme she was singing.

“Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any wool? Yes, sir, yes, sir, three bags full,” she sang as you moved and sat behind her. Tara leaned back, pressing her back against you like she did so many times over the years and you leaned down to kiss her cheek.

“Need help?” you offered, already putting your arms around her own.

“No, but I like this,” she whispered, and so you stayed like that, without a care in the world, all four of you cuddled together as the soft breeze came through the slightly opened window. “Did we wake you up?”

You just shook your head. “I wish you did, I was missing out,” you replied, nuzzling your face against her neck, and leaving a couple of soft, innocent kisses.

“Y/N, look,” Tara suddenly gasped and you looked down at Susan, and sure enough, the two and a half months old girl smiled up at you, and as if encouraged by his sister Zack went and did the same.

“They have your smile,” you were mesmerized, just watching the first actual, large smiles on the twins’ faces.

“You think?” Tara asked, just as breathless as you.

You couldn’t speak, you just nodded, grinning widely and pulling your family just a bit closer.

“Talk about a slightly early birthday gift,” Tara pointed out, laughing slightly when she remembered she’d turn twenty-five in three days.

“Guess they know how to treat their mom,” you said, still unable to wipe the grin off your face. “Say, what cake do you want?”

Tara thought it over, humming slightly and leaning the back of her head on your shoulder. “If you really have to-”

“Which I do,” you interrupted playfully.

Tara couldn’t smack you with her hands full, so she just lightly nipped at your ear. “How about a cheesecake? We haven’t had one in a while and it won’t take you too long to make it,” she suggested, and you nodded. Cheesecake it is.

~X~ March 2030 ~X~

You were reading a bedtime story to the twins, a bit tired from the work but more than ready to spend some time with your kids. Tonight, you were reading The Lion King to them. It was one of their favorites and they eagerly settled down on each side of you as you kept reading through Simba’s tale. Around the time you reached the confrontation with Scar Zack got fussy and moved to your lap, but you managed to finish the story.

Unfortunately, it didn’t seem either of them were ready to fall asleep, as Susan drew random shapes on the pillow. Guess she got that from Tara as well, and you honestly couldn’t help but smile at that.

Zack reached up all of a sudden and touched your jaw. “Boo-boo,” your eyes widened and you just looked at him. “Mama,” he babbled when you didn’t respond to him as quickly as he was used to.

“Sorry, yeah, it’s a boo-boo,” you gently caressed the back of his head, ruffling his hair in the process and making him giggle.

Susan seemed to get curious as well, as she crawled from the bed to your lap. “Hurts?” she patted the scar as well, not sure how it got there, hell, you were sure this was the first time they properly noticed that wasn’t exactly supposed to be there.

“Not anymore,” you replied, smiling when the two settled down in your arms.

“Oh,” Zack mumbled, already feeling sleepy, his attention was no longer on the scar as he curled up a bit and closed his eyes.

They quickly fell asleep, and you found yourself touching the old scar. It’s been almost a decade since you got the scars from that night at the hospital. If you told your sixteen-year-old self this was the life you would be living she’d laugh at you and probably get into a fight. That you’d be married to Tara, have two wonderful children, that you’d be a retired MMA world champion, that you’d have a successful company that allowed your family a very comfortable life, that you’d have all of this before turning thirty and that you’d be the happier than ever and excited about life.

Tara slowly opened the doors, just to make sure she couldn’t wake the twins up if they were asleep and smiled when she saw the three of you cuddled together on the bed.

“Hey, you look like something is on your mind,” she leaned down to kiss the twins on the tops of their heads before softly kissing you as well.

“I’ve been thinking about the past, how I couldn’t even begin to imagine this life when I was a teenager,” you told her, for once leaning into her touch as she sat down next to you. And while making sure Zack and Susan were still comfortable and asleep you moved so you could rest your head on Tara’s chest.

She ran her fingers through your hair, and all the tension in your body, all the exhaustion accumulated during the day gradually disappeared. “Did something happen?” Tara asked you. She was too in tune with you, granted you were the same with her.

“Zack noticed the scar, it just took me by surprise,” you told her, having no reason to hide what just happened. Besides, both of your kids just noticed, wanted to know if you were in pain and when you said you weren’t let it go.

Tara still tensed behind you and hugged you from behind. “You’re my hero, you know? The love of my life and the mother of my children,” she whispered softly, moving to get the kids off you. You were about to get up to help her, but she just pushed you back on the bed and put Zack and Susan in their own beds. Then, with a soft, gentle smile on her face she lay down next to you and pulled you closer so you could fall asleep in her arms.

~X~

A few days later, on your insistence, Tara took Zack and Susan out to the local park. Normally you’d go with them, and you’d spend time there as a whole family, but there was something you really should have done earlier.

The front doors opened, and you leaned back into your armchair, relaxed and ready to finally have the necessary conversation with the woman that just walked in. Sam froze, expecting Tara and the kids to be there, yet you were the only one she could see.

“Hey, Sam,” you said, getting up and approaching her. It’s been almost three years since you and Sam were alone, and it’s been almost three and a half years since you and Sam were on actual good terms. “I think it’s about time we talk this out,” you told her, hands held in your pockets and expression fairly neutral.

“Y/N,” she began, but then just sighed, accepting her current circumstances. “I figured this would happen soon. Did Tara convince you to talk to me?” she asked as you reached over to the table and grabbed the remote so you could turn the TV off.

“Nope, she agreed we need to do this though,” you replied and turned toward the kitchen. “I have ojo de pancha, want some?” you were trying to bury the hatchet with Sam, not start a fight, so, as a kind of an olive branch you made ojo de pancha.

“Uh, sure, I’d like some,” Sam said, though you could hear some uncertainty in her voice.

You took your time, preparing the coffee and serving the pastries on the plate. You did take Sam by surprise, well, it was a bit of a payback for framing you, and you and Tara were sure she wouldn’t have agreed to come if she knew she’d be alone with you.

When you came back to the living room you found Sam fidgeting with a loose strand of her shirt. She definitively quit smoking, and she hasn’t touched alcohol ever since you ended the cult, and that was part of the reason for trying to reconcile with her. You remembered the first time you made the pastries for Sam, on her 25th birthday, you remembered all the times the two of you worked together to either surprise Tara or support her through tough times, all the times you went out without Tara, how competitive both of you were, how you formed a bond that no longer relied on Tara, and it all just fell apart. “So, straight to the point or do you want to have some small talk first?”

Sam looked at you just for a moment before looking away, she truly couldn’t look you in the eyes anymore. “Straight to the point,” she decided.

“I want to start again. Leave what happened behind and move on,” you told her calmly, your tone almost the exact opposite of how it was when you were alone the last time. To this day Tara still didn’t know Sam was the one who framed you, but she knew something bad had happened to cause the rift, she didn’t need to know what it was exactly, she just felt it.

“I… don’t deserve it,” Sam argued and finally looked at you. “I framed you for your father’s murder, I put Tara in danger, and I killed so many people and still got to walk free,” she wasn’t pretending, she truly believed what she was saying.

Sam wanted to be punished, but you weren’t willing to give that to her. You had no intention of being her judge when your hands were stained with blood as well. “Zack and Susan are perceptive,” you said, making her finally look at you, so you took the chance to point at your scar. “They noticed this a few nights ago. It’ll only be a matter of time before they notice the tension between us. I want all five of us to go on vacations, I want you to be more present in their lives, and I don’t want to make excuses to be absent when you come over.”

“Y/N, that’s not what I want, I would never want you to that,” Sam argued.

“So, just let it go. You made mistakes, but things turned out fine. Besides, I want you back in my life, step by step,” you got up and offered her your hand.

Sam stared at your hand before slowly getting up herself, and she just hugged you. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for everything Y/N,” she whispered when you finally hugged her back. It would take some time, but you’d get over this and this awkward tension would eventually disappear.

~X~ July 2032 ~X~

The heat was killing Chad as he parked in your and Tara’s driveway and all the air conditioning in the world seemed utterly useless against the scorching hot July sun. He hoped, for your sake, that you made ice cream or had something else to cool him down because he was about to melt into a puddle and you and Tara were already busy with two kids, you didn’t need to wipe him off your floors.

Besides, it would be a shame if he melted. Zack and Susan loved him! He was their favorite person in the world! After Tara and you, of course, an maybe Sam was a worthy contender for that title as well, but he reigned supreme as the favorite non-parent person, he was sure of that!

“Uncle Chad!” Zack and Susan ran up to him and jumped into his arms.

“Hey! Look at you two!” he exclaimed, lifting them up, they were getting a bit heavy. “What are your moms feeding you, cause I want some of that as well,” the children giggled as he carried them up to the front doors. “How about you help me, Zack?” he asked, hoping the boy would lean down and open the doors for him.

Zack rubbed his chin, as if thinking it over, he then looked at Susan and they both shook their heads. “Mom doesn’t need help!” he exclaimed all happy and proud.

Chad just looked at him blankly, honestly feeling betrayed by the boy. “Susan?” but the girl just shook her head. It was kinda scary how much they resembled Tara, her big expressive eyes, dark hair, freckles, and they smiled and laughed just like she did. They even had the same habit of teasing him as well.

“Little traitors,” he rolled his eyes and was about to try and open the doors when they, miraculously opened by themselves.

“Mommy!” Susan exclaimed, holding her arms out as Tara stood aside, letting Chad in.

Tara grinned, happily taking her daughter into her arms, and kissing the side of her head. “Did you two say ‘hi’ to Uncle Chad?” she asked, reaching over to ruffle Zack’s hair.

“Yup!” Susan exclaimed.

Tara smiled and turned her attention to Chad. “Hey, it’s good to see you,” she told him and moved to hug him as well as she could, given that they each had one of her children in their arms.

She led him inside, where you were already busy making lunch and from the looks of it you were going all out. It made sense, after all, it was a bit of a Core Six reunion. Mindy, Anika and Sam were yet to arrive, but it was only a matter of time.

“Y/N, hey!” he approached you once he lowered Zack down and swung his arm over your shoulder.

You smirked, wiping your hands and bumping his fist, and Zack, following the example of his favorite non-parent person in the world, raised his fist toward you. ���Well, hello there,” you crouched down, fist bumping Zack as well.

The warmth and happiness radiated from the house and Chad for a moment wondered if he could ever build something like this as well. What you and Tara had was something special, and he was sure the two of you never actually argued. Sure, small quarrels here and there, maybe over what to have for dinner, or what movie was better, but the bond between you and Tara was so strong he doubted either of you raised your voice out of anger, let alone got into a serious argument.

~X~

Later that night you were all in the living room, just chatting as you and the kids played with the ball. They were bored, so, they quite easily convinced you to sit down on the floor and play with them. Whoever got to ten points first would win, and they, as usual, focused on earning their points by beating you at the game.

Eventually, Tara kneeled behind you and placed her chin on the top of your head as she hugged you from behind. You took her hand while still tossing the ball back to Zack.

“Unrealistic expectations,” Mindy suddenly spoke up causing you to nearly drop the ball when Susan tossed it back to you.

“What?” Tara asked, raising her eyebrow at Mindy.

“You two got trauma from your parents, your kids are going to grow up thinking this,” she pointed at you and Tara. “Is how every relationship is.”

“They better not settle for anything less, that’s for sure,” you continued playing the game with your kids, and sure, Mindy had a point, maybe you and Tara were setting too high of a standard, but you sure as hell didn’t want to set the bar too low.

“And they won’t. They’ll grow up, see other relationships, they’ll be fine,” Tara added, tightening her grip on you a bit more and sighing contently.

Mindy just pointed her thumb at Chad. “Living example of how your kids will turn out,” she said dryly.

Chad grinned. “Exactly! Wait, what?”

“When was the last time you were in a relationship?” Anika asked.

“Two weeks ago,” Chad replied, still not sure what that had to do with anything.

“Exactly, and you’ve dated her for like half a month. You want a best friend and a girlfriend in one pack,” she then turned back to you and Tara. “And it’s all your fault for being like this after all these years,” she actually sounded a bit exasperated.

“Mindy, chill,” Sam laughed a bit, taking a sip of her tea and tossing the ball back to Zack when he dropped it.

The boy looked at the ball, you tossed it to him, and he failed to catch it, meaning you scored a point, catching up to him and Susan. Him and Susan were tied, and both missing one point to win, but now you were missing two points. He then looked at you and then at Tara. “Mommy, help!” he cried out with a toothy grin.

You yelped when Tara grabbed your hands and held them in place as he tossed the ball to Susan, who grinned and tossed it to you, which, of course, meant you couldn’t catch it.

“You lose, Mom!” Susan laughed and jumped into your arms, prompting Zack to do the same, and with Tara helping them they brought you down to the floor, and whether it was their age and childish disregard for danger and injuries, or if it was some kind of instinctual belief that you’d keep them safe from the fall they just kept laughing.

You freed your arms from Tara’s hold and pulled your entire family into a hug, laughing with them.

 You heard someone being smacked and then Anika saying: “Hush, they are adorable and you know it,” ah so Mindy was about to tease the four of you.

“Okay, okay, let’s wash our hands! It’s time for cake!” you stood up, bringing the twins up with you as they cheered, eager to eat anything sweet.

Later that night, when you finally looked at your phone to set an alarm you saw that Sam had sent you a photo through a group chat. You smiled softly as you looked at the four of you laughing after Tara, Zack, and Susan tackled you to the floor. “Well, that’s a lockscreen,” you grinned, immediately changing the previous one. There was just something spontaneous about this photo.

~X~

Zack and Susan were sleeping over at Sam’s place, for the second time in their entire lives. The first time was… memorable. They got scared and you and Tara had to go over to help them fall asleep, because Sam, well she wasn’t exactly experienced with taking care of kids, and she wasn’t that experienced now, but the twins spent a bit more time alone with her since the first sleepover attempt and things would probably be fine.

So, seeing as you and Tara had the first solo night since the twins were born you decided to go on a bit of a nostalgia trip, so here Tara was, munching on pancakes, occasionally feeding you while sitting on your lap as the two of you watched the Babadook.

“How many times have we watched this movie anyway?” you chuckled as the credits rolled and Tara just leaned back against you.

“I lost count,” she looked back at you and softly kissed your cheek. “What genre do you think Zack and Susan will like?”

You had no idea. Horror was a bit too obvious of an answer, but there was a good chance they’d come to like it simply due to horror being Tara’s favorite genre. “We’ll see,” you settled for that answer.

“That’s a boring answer,” Tara pouted, and you just shrugged.

“They’ll have great taste in movies, that’s all I know,” you just told her and nuzzled against her neck. She was using that damn perfume that drove you wild again. And you were willing to bet she did it on purpose.

“Damn, Tara,” you sighed, leaning your head back a bit.

“Did I get you worked up?” she teased prompting you to just nod. “Good,” she reached behind and placed her right palm on the nape of your neck and pulled you closer. She twisted around slightly so she could kiss your neck and you took a deep breath and exhaled as her lips moved from the side of your neck, up to your jaw and finally met your lips.

You could taste the pancakes on her tongue as she deepened the kiss, she turned around, straddling your lap and moaned when you put your hands on her hips and pulled her even closer. “I missed this so much,” she said as she pulled back and you clearly saw the mischievous glint in her eyes. “Say, do we really need that much sleep to function tomorrow?” she whispered in your ear.

“We’ll manage somehow,” you picked her up and climbed up the stairs. Might as well use the night alone properly.

Taglist: @alexkolax

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x female reader #scream #jenna ortega x reader

[clone-anon]

I miss Tech. I know you might not be able to write for awhile and I get that. If you feel up to it though could you please write a fic where Tech is able to come to Pabu after tantis and finds out the Marauder is gone. Maybe reader (platonic/aromantic) comforts him with hugs and memories tks

Hello! I have some pretty strong feelings about Tech and how we still didn't see him in the entire last third of The Bad Batch. Here is hoping he will come home soon. And in manifestation of this....

Tech x GN!Reader

Warnings: Mention of injuries, but nothing explicit. No indication of whether Tech was CX-2 or not. Tech lives, obviously!

You sat on the landing pad near the ocean. It was empty now, but the last few remnants of the Marauder were only recently removed. In the rush to get to Tantiss, the people of Pabu did their best to help clean up the mess from the explosion while Wrecker, Hunter, and Crosshair left with Phee. You were among them, trying to grab whatever you could and sort through anything that you felt the brothers would want to keep. There wasn't much. Thankfully Gonky, Lula, Tech's goggles and various pieces of armor were already removed when the ship exploded. You did, however, manage to find and keep one thing.

You smiled to yourself as you looked down at the yoke and the lever used to jump to hyperspace.

"You recovered it?" Tech asked as he approached.

"I did," you replied with a smile. "I thought you might want to keep it."

Tech sat next to you with a flinch and sighed.

"You okay?" you asked.

"I'm better today." He was still healing, but mostly there. His family had waited until he was better to tell him about the Marauder. He didn't take it well, although he tried to insist it was merely a ship that could be replaced. You all knew better, but it was Tech's way to try to process the information.

Tech reached for the yoke and you gladly gave it to him. He held it in his hands as he had done hundreds of times while piloting the ship. It fit his grip perfectly.

"I requested this particular part," he said. "I requested the modifications to the Marauder. I was nine, but argued that since they felt we were nearly ready for battle, we should be able to get the best equipment. They made some of the modifications, but I made most of them. Even the ones they deemed unnecessary."

He reached for the lever and you handed it to him. He felt so natural holding these pieces, yet they were less familiar since they were no longer attached to anything.

"What was it like when you first flew the Marauder?" you asked.

Tech fondly smiled and answered, "The training simulations were not adequate, but I adapted quickly."

He grimaced, now faced with the thought that he would never fly his ship again. He would never have that home again. He took in a breath. Things changed, but he wasn't alone. He made it to Pabu, their new home. He put the yoke and lever aside and tried to smile at you. You opened your arms to invite him in for a hug if he wanted it. He didn't hesitate. He'd been separated from his family and friends for so long. He rested his head against yours and you held each other. While he wasn't usually one to cry, a few tears trickled down his face.

"I cannot explain why I feel this way. I'm home. We lived. I should only feel gratitude."

"It's okay, Tech," you reassured. "Sometimes I can't put my finger on my feelings, but I simply feel them. We're all built a little different. Besides, you survived a terrible fall. It takes a toll on your body, including your exceptional mind."

He nodded and took in a deep breath. You held him a little closer and waited for him to feel ready to let go. You stayed up with him and watched the ocean while he spent the night telling you all kinds of stories about flying and the modifications he wanted to make on a new ship.

#tbb #tbb fanfiction #tbb tech #tbb tech lives #the bad batch #the bad batch tech #tech lives #tbb tech x reader #tech x reader #tech anon #tech x platonic reader #tbb tech x platonic reader #tech x gn!reader #tbb tech x gn!reader #reader insert #platonic reader

[cult-of-the-eye]

Ok I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna make the new hyperfixation post:

CRIMINAL MINDS:

I started watching it cause I was on the internet during the Dr Reid thirst trap era and let's just say a scrawny motherfucker with autism is the surefire way to get me to watch something

Especially when everyone is going through the horrors

I am in love with the format of the show, with the whole quotes and then different characters saying the quotes and the isolated cases with the slight hints of more background for each of the characters it's really keeping me going

I'm not great with gore and shit but like it's got shitty 2000s CGI so like it's easy to tell myself it's just actors with fake blood

Also listen I had to tap into my 9 yr old undiagnosed autistic obsessed with psychopaths phase at some point

It just tickles the right parts of my brain

Anyway the characters are why I stuck around

Gideon <3333 I love that strange walrus looking man I love how he's simultaneously such an emotional rock for everyone in the BAU but also dealing with his own things, he goes into each of the crimes with such calmness and compassion and I just love that weird old man especially when he introduced himself as Jason to the little girl he was saving in that one episode, i was like HE'S MAKING HIMSELF SEEM LIKE LESS OF A THREAT BY INTRODUCING HIMSELF WITH HIS FIRST NAMEEEE, HE'S TRYING TO PUT HER AT EASE

Hotch oh man it was one scene specifically that literally started my brainrot for this guy, I wasn't that into him in the first couple of episodes and then it was revealed that he was horrifically abused by his dad and actively chose to go into a pathway that would catch people like that and people who get abused and then go on to abuse others and I just. AH. i am such a sucker for any character who has endured things that no one ever should endure at the hands of another human being and then instead of becoming completely bitter and taking the eye for an eye mindset, they vow to make sure the cycle stops with them and they may not be all sunshine and daisies and instead rough a lot of the times but they do it and they do it realistically

He's got a wife and a kid!!! He did it!! He made a better life for himself and it makes me feel like I could too, he's so strong and I feel like my strength can one day be used for more than just survival

Elle!!!! God I love her I feel like she's so realistic for a woman in her field, she's smart and strong and capable and she acknowledges all the things she has going against her, she's compassionate to the female rape victims, she gets furious at the people targeting women in particular what i would do to be this woman's friend

Reid. Oh lord. Listen I'm not on the thirst trap train but I do understand the love for this guy. My love for him however stems from the autism. The whole wanting to be useful and only knowing how to through interests and hyperfixations and feeling like he's missing out on some things cause he's different

It was the hostage situation on the train that got to me he was just so REAL and it's so awesome to see autistic people succeed in stuff like this

It's also nice to see him accepted by the team for who he is

I do also like him cause he's cool but it's easier to explain the autism stuff

Garcia - wonderful amazing spectacular I love me a confident woman in stem

Morgan - i like how he's sort of the "cool guy" archetype but his whole thing is getting into the mind of the UnSub I feel like it gives him more depth

JJ - god she's so cool and calm under pressure I love her

So yeah. The BAU is my new comfort character crew I'm taking Elle with me everywhere

But also do I have major issues with the idea of behavioural analysis in crime? Absolutely. It is so insanely subjective the way they're going off of probability, the way their precedent probably lacks temporal validity and also population validity with both the androcentrism and ethnocentrism it does feel wrong to be coming to such a conclusion about the UnSub so quickly and decisively, even though I understand their whole thing is getting there quickly. I just know that categorising human behaviour is never as simple as it seems.

Do I think they tackle some of these issues in the show? Sort of. Am I also aware this is a fictional drama TV show and it may not be that deep? Yes.

Anyway

#rant over #i am so fixated on this show #its so bad i have exams this week #criminal minds #hyperfixations #aaron hotchner #jason gideon #elle criminal minds #derek morgan #penelope garcia #spencer reid #jennifer jareau

[en-geneisaxx]

𝒲𝑒𝒷𝒷𝑒𝒹 𝑒𝓃𝓉𝒶𝓃𝑔𝓁𝑒𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉𝓈

𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: 𝑺𝒑𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒂𝒏!𝑯𝒐𝒐𝒏 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

🄵🄴🄰🅃🅄🅁🄸🄽🄶: ᴇɴʜʏᴘᴇɴ, ʏᴇᴏɴᴊᴜɴ ᴏғ ᴛxᴛ

E̶n̶e̶m̶y̶s̶ 𝚝𝚘 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬, 𝕾𝖚𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖔 𝖆𝖚.

Ｗａｒｎｉｎｇｓ: ｌａｎｇｕａｇｅ

𝑇𝑎𝑔𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑔: @jaylaxies @pockettwinzz @diorsyun @rinbowaman @heeslomll @hoonieshoneymain

sʏᴘɴᴏsɪs: Sunghoon is quite a confusing man. He's the renowned spiderman that's keeping its identity a question, but he is also quite a mean guy to a certain lady. But, your natural charms had a go at him, and now he's looking at you at a different persepective: someone he could spend his forever with. It'll take time though, from pain to growth, but rest assured, he's quite a lover.

ʅιƙҽʂ, ɾҽႦʅσɠʂ αɳԃ/σɾ ϝσʅʅσɯιɳɠ ɱҽ ɯιʅʅ Ⴆҽ ɱυƈԋ αρρɾҽƈιαƚҽԃ!!

Part 1: Meeting her...

Dividers by @dollywons!!

Sunghoon's successfully survived the start of his Uni life with the help of his friends, Jake and Jay. It was time for chemistry, and neither did your nor Sunghoon expect this to be the fateful encounter, and a start of a blossoming relationship.

The trio sat in the back, especially in a corner, knowing that the professor wouldn't look so high up. They were busy judging girls, and were disgusted when a few thought they could really have a chance with them, using their 'cute manner'. To Sunghoon, it was just faces scrunched up in weird positions, and annoying high-pitched voices that secretly let out their inner whore.

Ah, then came a beauty that had no intention of boasting her divine looks, someone gentle and innocent. It seems she didn't have a person she knew, coming in and sitting alone, silently, three benches to the back. She did everything so gracefully, like as if it was something she always does. Maybe he could have a shot at talking to her, hoping she won't bite.

Once class ended, Sunghoon packed his bag in a hurry, glancing every few seconds in case you were leaving. To his delight, you were still organising your bag, giving him the oppurtunity to talk.

"Umm, hi.." Sunghoon knew how awkward it felt. He may be loud, but he was an Introvert, limiting his ability to speak up.

You felt you should continue it on, seeing how shy he was, he's probably panicking that you were going to ignore him. He was very handsome as well, encouraging you to continue this new meeting.

"Hi...nice to meet you." You can't lie, your heart was going to explode when you saw his smile, eyes with a sparkle of hope.

"I-I'm Sunghoon!" He squirmed at the fact he stuttered, thinking it made him look absolutely pathetic.

(Cute..) You thought, starting to become more delusional by the second. Could he possibly like you? Why was he stuttering? In any case, it would be nice making a friend.

"I'm Y/n...Y/n L/n" You chuckled, seeing the way a pink tint began to reveal on his bread cheeks.

Jake and Jay hanged about in the corner, amused by this sudden conversation. Sunghoon wasn't the type to initiate one with a stranger, giving them the idea he may have fallen for her. Why wouldn't he though? She was very pretty, and looked like she was wife material.

"So uh, do you wanna hang out with us..? I-I'm gonna go get some lunch then uh..walk around.." He honestly didn't know what to do with such a woman, because he wanted to give his all.

"That would be nice, I'll go pack up!" You flashed him a smile, assuring him that you were excited about this.

You and Sunghoon just decided to walk around campus, gifted with a beauiful, sunny weather and vibrant colours of green and orange on mother nature. When people eyed you both down, you figured it was just Sunghoon's perfection. Turns out, this whole time your arms were linked together, giving anyone the impression that you were a couple. It looked unreal, for you both were gorgeous.

You guys just exchanged things about life in general, from talking about favourite foods to the most embarassing moments, you two almost shared it all: almost. Sunghoon got way too comfortable with you, sharing many things that had happened in his life. He only snapped back into reality when you asked what he does. He needed to make something believeable, and quick. 'Entertainment'...AH!

"Oh, I'm just a singer and dancer that's payed good money, I also do a bit of modelling here and there." He laughs it off in an attempt to make it look casual.

You weren't suprised, his good looks would've carried him if he was part of the entertainment industry.

Today seemed like it was in Sunghoon's favour, bell ringing to cut off any possibilty of her asking to come around.

"Oh, shoot! What class have you got next?" Sunghoon asked, feeling a bit panicked as Jake and Jay were nowhere to be seen.

"I think we have the same class, let's just go." Dragging Sunghoon, who looked like a lost puppy.

"How was your date with Miss Y/n L/n?" Mocked Jake, rubbing his shoulders with Sunghoon.

"Do you know where she lives?" Asked Jay, cringing at Jake's faces.

"Why d'you ask?" Grunted the youngest, shoving Jake off him.

"If you like her, protect her." Stated the eldest of the trio, making Sunghoon sprint to you, because it's not time to swing about just yet. Geez, Jay's so damn smart.

"H-hey! Y/n!" Sunghoon called out, a slight pant coming out his lips. You liked seeing Sunghoon, and you trusted him.

"What's up, Hoon?" He bit his lip at the nickname, loving you as each second passes.

"Uhh, can I walk you home?" Shit, why did he have to be perfectly positioned in the sunlight, like as if you were meeting an angel in heaven.

You couldn't deny him, and, you pretty much wanted it. You took your time packing your things, so that you could be one of the last people, and less interference.

"Yeah, maybe you could protect me..." You muttered while running away, "OR THOSE MUSCLES ARE FAKE AND ARE ONLY ON DISPLAY!!"

That hurt his pride, and boy, the time at the gym was worth it.

Jay and Jake shared one mind at this point:

"He's down bad."

#en-geneisaxx #enhypen #fyp #enhypen sunghoon #engene #kpop #enha #fanfic #enhypen jay #enhypen jake #park sunghoon ff #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon x y/n #enhablr

[threebea]

I love all the beautiful Imperial Sithy-Wan art. It's not my cup of tea for reading but I do understand the appeal. But when I do find myself thinking of Sithy-Wan it goes very grungy.

Maybe he's more of a dark Jedi because he's not a Sith he's just fallen.

Obi-Wan is a person that survives and outlives so for me his breaking point is grimy dirty losing again and surviving it, surviving another person. It's not even a person he knew long or well but they were good and they didn't deserve it.

He loses hope and himself.

So you have Vader getting news of him and it's this angry Obi-Wan who has traveled and has been killing 'bad' people without mercy and without compassion to them or himself.

And he's the Obi-Wan that can look at Vader and say: "This time it will be through your heart, Anakin."

#obi-wan kenobi #star wars #fanfiction #sithy-wan #darth vader #angst #fallen obi-wan #it's the end of his endurance and love #he is lashing out selfishly #if he keeps surviving the he's going to take people with him #just all messy feelings latching on yo resentment and hatred of those that trample on good people #and totally aware he is lost #and doesnt care anymore #Imperial Obi-Wan is so pretty tho so i really do get it

[shakingparadigm]

Would the human pets be capable of basic tasks like washing their clothes or preparing food? I can see some pets knowing how to prepare food as like, a fun little party trick to impress others, but as a basic survival skill I don't think it's commonly taught to humans anymore. There's most likely a line drawn between pets that are helpful and reliable, and pets that are too capable, to the point where certain owners may feel threatened by their level of intelligence and independence. I wonder just how helpless the humans would be without their aliens.

#alien stage #alnst #rambles #my take is this: hyuna is completely independent and knows every basic survival skill (a long process of learning if she was self-taught) #but afterwards she taught every single recruit how to take care of themselves. #i think hyuna would be the closest to a normal functioning adult in terms of skillset among the main cast #mizi would know how to prepare certain foods but only very simple ones #im not sure if till would know how to do anything properly but he's at least resourceful enough to keep himself going on his own #(since it seems like Guardian Urak leaves him to fend for himself most of the time) #Ivan would know how to do a lot of things in theory but has most likely never performed them himself #and i think sua and luka perform very decorative trophy-esque roles to their owners #so they wouldn't really know how to do anything other than what they're trained to excel at #of course theyre smart people so theyd pick it up eventually #but as of now they probably dont know how to cook or wash or properly clean aside from the basics of tidying after themselves #especially since sua is stated to constantly be in a daze with no plans #and luka as a kid seemed in his own world most of the time #THIS IS JUST ME THO LOL my opinions are bound to change eventually im jist #im just speculating and headcanoning for funsies

[devil-changmin]

Putting it in the tags cuz it’s long, also Dec 18 tw

#bro every single time I listen to I will fight #especially on this day #I cannot BELIEVE it is a real song #I’m sure I’ve said it before but when u have the depression like I do it is so cathartic to hear songs that express the feeling of #being sad in spite of everything and wanting to die etc #but I will fight…..like…dude…. #saying maybe I want to die too but I’m choosing not to - I’m going to keep living because I want to honor your life #I’m going to survive to ensure that your memory doesn’t hold any pain #to say my entire life is for you because I will love you and miss you for the rest of it #to take desperation in the face of tragedy and turn it into that vibrant will to live #it’s insanity #and I know it was like therapeutic for him to create that song because the feelings are so genuine #but sometimes I can’t believe that he wrote and released it #like u tear your heart open for who? your fans? just so hell hear you? if enough people listen to it #will he hear our hearts cfying out that we want to live for him #that we don’t mind growing older as he lingers in the past #because we are all keeping him alive with the beat of our hearts #to say that every night and every darkness you look for the shining remnants of his life?!?!?!? #and he just let us share it #it’s so #you know

[drowningparty]

I love black sails! but my favourite part is enjoying it in my own private thought prism because for years I firmly believed flint was the hero and silver was the villain for betraying him and it wasn’t until last week when I checked the internet I realised a shocking number of people think silver is the protagonist and flint is just his antagonist? makes you think. they’re wrong but. makes you think.

#in a way that's the overarching message isn't it? #I mean it's also fuck colonialism #but the idea there's no such thing as heroes or villains it all comes down to who lives to tell your tale and whats their agenda #thats why flint is the villain in treasure island #silver was the one who lived to tell the story and of course he'd tell a version that justifies his betrayal #so he looks less irredeemable #but I personally will never forgive him for stopping flint and madi's war #flint's the hero the visionary trying to change the world for the better and end slavery and destroy an empire and avenge his lost love #but he can't succeed because 'everyone else' keeps getting in the way #silver is representative of that 'everyone else' #most people don't want to change the world for the better they just want to survive it #so nothing gets better because they encourage complacency #they tell you to take what you have and never ask for more #even when what you have is already in ashes #and yeah sure maybe you'll live longer that way #but you're hardly going to make things better for future generations #black sails

[polyamorouspunk]

.

#I already feel like I share too much of my brother’s personal life on here #talking about how hard it was for him to come out as polyam (or not really come out as polyam but tell her he’s in a triad #but that how once again he paved the way for me to be like oh I’ve been polyam and dating other people on and off for years #and then talking about the excitement of hearing that his partners bought him a camera for his birthday #hearing all of this from my mom btw because my brother and I don’t talk much #but apparently his boyfriend broke up with him but didn’t want to break up with his fiancé #and how then his fiancé was still seeing that guy and trying to take my brother’s fiancé away from him #and how my brother’s ex-bf/his fiancé’s boyfriend wasn’t speaking to my brother #and then he and his fiancé stopped speaking for a while even though they live together #and then my mom said that finally their boyfriend was like ‘oh well I want to be with [my brother’s fiance] and live together #so my brother had to be like ‘well either he can move in here and I’ll find someplace else to live or something’ #and I mean thankfully my brother-in-law finally had some sense and was like oh okay this is an issue and I need to cut him out of our lives- #-so our relationship can survive and did #but I’m like 🔪🔪🔪 ready to fucking murder #I’m so mad that my brother got into a polyamorous relationship that went so terribly and almost made him loose my brother-in-law #and I’m mad at my brother-in-law for keeping it going for as long as it did #and I’m ready to kill their fucking ex boyfriend #and I hope that my ‘I’ll take them out back and bury them in the backyard’ uncle does just that #I’m mad that my brother is 32 and lives in a shitty abusive household #I’m mad that his life is shit #I’m ready to go Wednesday Adams for him #like you fuck with my brother? I’ll fucking kill you #we aren’t even that close but like he helped raise me #the least I can do is torture and murder for him

[grandmofftarkinsuggestions]

tarkin anxiety disorder moments.

#genuinely. and this is not just me projecting he's just Like That. #i would make a post taking down every Tarkin Anxiety Disorder moment but the fact that his whole doctrine is all about #how 'fear will keep them in line' and such is Very telling. #underneath it all he is deeply afraid and fear is a major driving force in his motivations. i think that's one of the biggest things that #people overlook about him tbh. #he's just like me fr. fear is a sign of weakness to him and yet it is vital to his belief set and survival...... #at least that's what he thinks. wilhuff 'i have been terrified my whole life' tarkin. #and that sense of fear has been drilled into him from such a young age..... #and once again with the tarkin novel as an excellent take down of fascist indoctrination: it's the fearmongering of it all. #sw #wilhuff tarkin #might go more in depth with this on a future post but for now. here.

[attractthecrows]

making myself moody by contemplating the clan Revallen left behind

#revallen lavellan #i almost don't want to consume any more DA bc if they've defined clan tillahnen then his backstory goes down the shitter entirely #me forgetting that this is not my IP: BUT WHAT IF THERE WAS A CLAN OF ENTIRELY SECRET KEEPERS #but they're soooo. they're so. imagine you have a very impressive Keeper. like he's wise and powerful and you're so proud of him #he sacrifices his life for you and his son! how noble. his son takes over as Keeper. He's not as wise yet but he is powerful and SMART #Your new Keeper grows into the job very well. You're proud of him! you love him! he loves you! he loves his clan! #he's married with a child. how sweet. it's nice to see him happy. #his wife dies. oh no. he is distraught #he's only responding to his child. the poor man! you and the rest of the clan give him space and try to make the best of it. #but you're all SO worried! you've never seen the Keeper in this state! even when his father died he still managed to lead. but not now. #you do everything you can to support him. you make sure he's fed. you keep people from bothering him while he's grieving. he's getting wors #and one night he just vanishes with his child #you can't abandon him! he's your Keeper! he's in no state to be traveling alone! what if he does something drastic??? #but you never find him or his child. you search and search for months and can't find a trace of them. eventually you mourn. #several years down the line you hear rumors of a conclave. good! the mages and templars are threatening everyone. #the conclave exploded! sad but predictable. those silly humans. #the Herald of Andraste survived! okay sure. humans right? #no he's Dalish! huh how weird. anyways #Haven was attacked! Ah! our poor kinsman caught up in this. how sad to die amongst shemlen #he survived! #they've declared an Inquisition! the Inquisitor... #...IS YOUR KEEPER!!! #there he is!! he's alive!! he's in charge of the humans' Inquisition for some reason but HE'S ALIVE!!!!! #do you pick everything up and go to him? or have you moved on as well? #'we cannot go back to the way things were' #vs 'we never cared about the circumstances - we cared about YOU. so what if times have changed?'

[makotoscoffee]

had another nightmare about Art the Clown😔

#luckily this one didn't have any confrontation #basically it was sort of like a combination of Halloween and Christmas #and we were prepared for his sort of arrival like when you we had to watch out at some point #the dream took place in our apartment and it was exactly the same except slightly different like a little bit bigger etc #anyways we had lots of family and friends overthe only one actually from real life being my grandmother and my mom #and people are coming to our door because it's like sort of trick or treating or something (including the queens from All Stars 7??) #but we don't answer cuz we're sort of anticipating that Art is coming. and I keep asking my mom like; #should we go to the store while we still have time like should we do something other than wait around #by the time I speak up it's too late and now the dream focuses on just me mom my grandma and a young girl (the other people left i guess) #basically the girl saw a reflection of Art all the way from the garden or something we live on the second for by the way #and our windows face the backyard which is quite big and you can see our downstairs neighbors' porch just below us #so what we do is we go over to the window but we have to be careful that he doesn't see us now we're sort of in Art-survival mode #he's like hyper-aware and if he sees us he'll try to get to us #I take a peek out the window and I see Art looking at himself on a reflective surface. luckily he didn't see me and I hide again #my grandma asks what's going on and I tell her just don't let him see you. and then I remember that the door to the apartment is unlocked #in the dream our door was basically useless because there was a huge like hole next to it like a window with no glass #but I lock the door anyway and it makes the tiniest little sound #and in my mind I can see Art walking out of the garden and coming towards the house. The end #in my other nightmares he's fucking chasing me with a hammer and shit

[a-b-riddle]

Part 2

Can't stop thinking about reader finally cutting them loose.

For three days there was nothing but radio silence. In those three days you had told yourself that it was a grace period. Time for Simon to cool off and realize how much of a bastard he was for saying all those things he obviously didn't mean. Johnny coming back over with a bouquet of flowers and endless apologies and cuddles.

Simon didn't apologize for his harsh words.

Johnny didn't call you later, as promised.

For three days you jumped at every single notification, silently hoping it was one of them. Any of them.

But it wasn't.

And you, unfortunately, got the answer to the question you had been asking yourself for months.

Did they still want this?

The answer was clear.

You didn't let their unofficial dismissal get to you. You still had shit to do. A life to get on to. A book signing to go to.

Jesus.

A book signing. A book you wrote. A book that was being published and released the day of the expo. You weren't expecting a huge line because this was your debut novel, but with the help of some ARC readers who had took to social media, there had been a bit of a storm brewing.

You had listened to John when he had mentioned writing under an alias. Don't know how crazy people are out there. They'd do anything to get close to you, Dove. Just better to protect yourself where you can. You almost hated yourself for listening to him now. Now you would just have to keep writing under your pen name.

You were getting ready to close up shop early when your phone finally pinged.

Kyle.

Fuck.

Of course it was Kyle. The one who hadn't treated you like you were constantly bothering him. Not the one who made you feel guilty for agreeing to your arrangement. Nor was he the one who fucked you and left you. No. He was just the one who just wasn't there.

Maybe that was just as bad.

What are you up to today?

That was it. Almost two weeks of radio silence and that's all he had to say? It just added more evidence that you were making the right call in ending this now. It had already carried on for too long.

You had two things on your to-do list and you wouldn't let Kyle's sudden reappearance deter you.

E-mail the publisher back.

Change the locks.

You didn't have the strength to face them again. If they groveled, it would be too easy to take them back. One against four wasn't much of a fair fight. And if they didn't care to fight for you... you don't know if you could survive it. Coming face-to-face with the proof that it didn't bother them to give you up even though it was killing you.

No. Cutting it off completely was the best thing to do.

So you didn't respond.

You left Kyle's text unanswered as you e-mailed the publisher back that everything was set for your flight on tomorrow morning. You would spend Thursday adjusting to the time difference and Friday you would rest up before the expo this weekend. She assured you that you would need to rest up your writing hand. Whatever that means.

You left Kyle read as you closed up shop several hours earlier than usual. You needed to drop off the bank deposit before you started on task number two.

You didn't bothering responding to Johnny when he had texted you when you were leaving the hardware store, purchase in hand. Asking if you were free Friday. Promising dinner. 'In or out. Your choice.'

It was almost second nature when you got home to pull up your phone. Ready to text one of them to see which one of them could come over and help.

Fixing a leaky sink? Nothing Johnny hasn't seen before. Need help moving furniture? John won't mind when you change your several times on what should go where. Kyle would always come in with take out the moment you mentioned you were hungry and whenever you felt like going for a walk when it was a bit too late in the evening, Simon was the first to volunteer as your personal guard dog.

But asking them to come and change the very lock you planned on using to keep them out seemed... counter productive, if not downright petty.

You were almost done with the lock when your phone sounded off. Only this time it wasn't a text. Someone was calling you.

You almost faltered when John's name came on your screen.

Fuck.

That almost got you.

You almost answered it.

Almost.

You clicked on the 'Sorry, I can't talk right now. Options, before finishing up your work.

And just like that, you were done. No help needed. You had changed the lock. Even adding on a deadbolt. Replacing the flimsy chain Simon had taunted you about. If someone wanted to get in here, that wouldn't stop them.

Well, now you didn't need to hear it anymore.

Not that you would really hear it again...

Your flight was in twelve hours. Although that seemed an ample amount of time you hadn't even begun to pack. You had luckily narrowed your outfits down, but now was the task of folding it nicely into your suitcase rather than just stuffing it in there.

On my way. We need to talk.

It was too late for talking. Three days too late. Several months too late.

The last message sent was four weeks ago. A new Thai place had opened up close to your apartment that you were wanting to try. All of them had given you excuses.

Not my taste, Dove.

Cannae do it tonight. Next weekend? Next weekend didn't happen either.

I can do tomorrow. Kyle ended up bailing. You forget the excuse he used.

Simon hadn't even bothered to reply.

The final nail in the coffin of your relationship. Almost two years wasted with nothing, but a broken heart to show for it. And the worst part is, they had all chipped away at your heart, leaving you to deal with the final blow that would shatter it.

Im sorry. I can’t do this with you anymore. wish you all the best.

Your fingers made quick work in blocking their numbers. It was best. If they wanted to reach you, they couldn't. On the other side of the coin, if they didn't care to reply, you wouldn't spend countless hours crying over the fact that none of them had been affected the same way you had.

You would deal with getting them their belongings that they had left behind another time. You had big things, great things happening for you. You were cutting your loses. You were cutting them loose.

You just hoped you didn’t regret it.

#captain john price #kyle gaz garrick #simon ghost riley #call of duty #john soap mactavish #poly141 #angst #grovel #groveling

[sunderwight]

AU where there's no system (or a decidedly less restrictive one) and Shen Yuan transmigrates into an OC rogue cultivator before the start of the novel, and decides he's gonna steal the protagonist before Luo Binghe even gets to Cang Qiong.

The logic is sound -- he'll keep Luo Binghe from experiencing neglect and abuse at Shen Qingqiu's hands, raise him away from the pressure of the sects and the likelihood that anyone else might find out about his heritage and try to harm him over it, keep him fully away from the Immortal Alliance Conference, and then Luo Binghe's course will change trajectory because he'll have no reason to want revenge against the world and no access to Xin Mo. Shen Yuan will be able to spare Luo Binghe some suffering and possibly survive in a world less subject to the harrowing whims of a half-mad tyrannical overlord. Win-win!

However, the tricky bit is that he's not sure exactly how far ahead of the novel he is, and also Airplane didn't specify where Luo Binghe grew up. This means that Luo Binghe could be any age younger than twelve and in any number of places along or near to the Luo river.

Shen Yuan decides he's going to approach this by pretending he is looking for the long-lost son of his sister, traveling through the likeliest areas, asking after abandoned children who might fit the protagonist's description. It's a long shot, he knows, and he's mostly relying on the existence of Narrative Destiny. But eventually he is directed by several people towards a particular city, which is not as close to the river as he'd have expected Luo Binghe to grow up, but then again he only knows that was where baby Binghe was found, not where the washerwoman who took him in ultimately lived.

It becomes clear to him, though, that he's been sent to the wrong target. But also why he's been sent astray is apparent in nearly the same breath, because among the slave children living in this area is a little boy who could be his much younger clone.

Seriously, this kid looks just like him! Or, well, close enough. He looks a lot like Shen Yuan's actual nieces and nephews from his past life. It's uncanny.

Also, because of his search, the slave kids get wind of what he's looking for (his long-lost nephew) pretty quick. The boy with the obvious resemblance to him greets Shen Yuan's own assessment with wary cynicism, but he's just a little boy. So it's not difficult to notice the way he's also practically vibrating with hopefulness, half-hiding behind a protective older kid and looking at Shen Yuan with big dark eyes like he expects to be rescued or destroyed with whatever he has to say next.

Shen Yuan has a big problem now. He just knows that if he says something like "actually no this boy is too old to be my nephew" or whatever other excuse, no one will believe him, and also this poor kid is going to be permanently scarred by it. He's going to think Shen Yuan is lying just so that he can reject him. On top of that, he's not in a good situation here. None of these children are even remotely well cared-for.

Shen Yuan's rogue cultivator self isn't rich on the level of being like a wealthy sect leader or anything, but he's made some money since transmigrating by doing random cultivator jobs and quests along the way here. He uses it all to purchase two little slave boys (Do Not Separate), then takes another job and uses that coin to acquire a somewhat rundown manor which used to belong to the local gentry. The Qiu family (rings some bells but that's not exactly an uncommon name) kept it up for a while in case a branch family sprung up in need of a residence, but they've been in decline and the place is downright decrepit, so they had been looking to sell it instead. It's too big for a wandering bachelor like SY to ever need on his own account, but that's sort of the idea. He makes more money taking on cultivator work, at first taking his boys along with him for lack of any alternative. Nerve-wrackingly dangerous! Eventually he hires workers to start restoring the manor, particularly setting up a yard to be a school area, and then starts taking on any freelance jobs he can get in order to steadily buy out the contracts on all the other kids. He gets it nice enough to house and care for as many orphans as he can acquire.

Not because he's a big old softie though!

His story of looking for his nephew is a bust now, since he's apparently "found" the kid. So he's got to change tactics! If he can't find baby Binghe and the washerwoman, the next best approach is to create an opportunity for them to come to him. So once he's got his new household established, he starts offering free lessons to all the local kids. Not just the ones he's taken in, but also any who come by and want to learn some things. It's a tempting setup for anyone who wants their child to get education but can't afford a tutor, and Luo Binghe's mother had been entirely the sort of person who would have packed up and left her situation if there had been an opportunity for it.

On that note, SY also starts hiring single mothers to help look after his new gaggle of children and do the work he doesn't know how to do in these times, like keeping house, laundry, cooking, actually raising kids, etc.

His "little school" is not universally popular. A few groups try and ruin him, because the poverty in the region provides a basis of business for them. The ringleaders of the human traffickers in the area don't want their trade to dry up, even if it means selling all of their merchandise for this round, so when they find out that their underlings let Shen Yuan buy off all the kids they try and intimidate him into returning them (it doesn't go well for them). The Qiu family also isn't thrilled after it becomes clear what he's doing, and get him investigated by the local authorities (read: use their bribed officials and local goons to try and interfere.)

When that doesn't work either the sects get involved, because the Qiu go crying to Huan Hua Palace that Shen Yuan is sketchy and is trying to establish his own sect. So Shen Yuan talks his way around the matter, and frankly the Qiu are small fish even if they're the biggest ones in the local pond, so HHP doesn't care to pursue things much further. (Read: SY could mop the floor with the disciples they sent to investigate him, and it's not worth it to piss off someone this mysterious and powerful just to bully some impoverished children.)

Shen Yuan is appalled by all this bullshit though. Trust the world of PIDW to make it so hard just for a guy to teach some poor kids how to read and do math!

It makes him dig in his heels about it, because he is at heart a stubborn bastard. The fires that once fueled a thousand angry screeds on zhongdian literature site is now aimed at the local magistrate. One of the women he's hired on has some dirt on the Qiu family, which leads SY to dig up some more until he eventually has enough to turn the tables on them. Local officials won't investigate because they've all been bought, but that in and of itself is of some interest to their superiors closer to the palace, and so SY arranges an investigation of his own that goes way further than he thought? Turns out there are some ugly skeletons in the Qiu closets, and the imperial investigator comes down on them hard.

Well, he can't say they didn't have it coming? Though he does feel bad for the children in the family, especially the oldest son, who gets hauled off to jail along with his father. At least the girl is sent to live with relatives. Maybe he should have done more to shield the minors in the situation...?

His kids tell him not to worry about it, though, that apparently young master Qiu was known to run people down in the streets and beat his servants and do other cartoonishly awful things. SY's not sure how much of it is true and how much of it is his little flock of fluffy sheep trying to ease his conscience, though they do all seem to take a lot of vindictive delight in the whole affair. Especially Nephew, who clings to his sleeves and loudly declares that the investigator should have publicly flogged the discredited nobles so that everyone could go watch, and then begs him for sweets as if that wasn't a creepy thing to hear come out of an eight-year-old's mouth. SY just sighs and tells him he can have something good when he finishes his calligraphy practice.

Of course, it's not exactly easy running what is basically an orphanage-slash-school (and maybe a budding sect...?), especially when pretty much all of the kids have been traumatized and faced stuff like rampant dehumanization, food insecurity, abuse, and neglect. Hiring single mothers soon becomes not only a plan to try and lure in Luo Binghe's mom, but an absolute godsend of an idea because SY has no clue WHAT he would do on his own about the discipline issues or emotional breakdowns or acting out that some of the kids get up to once it registers that they're in a safe enough place to unpack their baggage.

Apart from Nephew, SY's favorite kid is the one who came with him, the oldest of the flock of former slave children. He's the big brother of the group, the one who tries his best to look after the others and to not make any trouble himself. But even poor Little Yue is still just a kid who has been through too much, and he also eventually starts having some meltdowns and struggles with processing everything that has happened to him as a vulnerable child in an unkind world.

SY really didn't mean to start a trauma center for mistreated children!

Though, that's still not necessarily a bad thing for Luo Binghe to one day come across, provided he ever actually shows up...

Eventually, Shen Yuan does figure out that he must be ahead even of Luo Binghe's birth, though he still doesn't put together that he's interfered in the scum villain's backstory. Probably something even more amusingly obscure, like the creation year of some random artifact Luo Binghe used in some wife plot or other, tips him off and he mentally throws his hands up in the air. He's got to wait DECADES? Maybe he ought to try and find Luo Binghe's biological parents and just follow them around at this point!

Not that he can, now, though, because he has to make sure no negative IQ villains (who will probably just be cannon fodder for a subplot one day) decide to send goons to literally burn down his orphanage. Also if he's gone for too long his kids get upset. Probably because no one else is as weak to their puppy dog eyes and pleas for treats and toys as he is.

At least it gives him time to shore up his position, and train Nephew and Little Yue more extensively in cultivation. Despite his initial assurances to HHP that he was but a humble orphan wrangler who was only incidentally a cultivator, Shen Yuan does also teach the other kids some basic cultivation exercises. There are a few reasons for that.

One is just the principle of the thing. No, these kids don't all have the potential to become great immortals or anything, but they can still learn some of it and it's good for their health if they do. The only trouble is if they try and push too hard or attempt things beyond their range, and that's a risk with everyone who cultivates. Or even just exercises!

Another reason is that it helps stave off the jealousy that some of the kids have towards those with more cultivation potential. Teaching a lot of the basics all around makes it into just another topic at school. Some kids might not be as good at it as others, but those kids might also be better at math, or memorization, or board games, and while cultivation can open more doors to people as adults, for the children this is generally enough to satisfy their sense of fairness. Or at least reduce outbursts and fights.

Finally, the impression that any of SY's kids might be a cultivator also makes wicked people more reluctant to try and abduct or interfere with them. Cultivators are revered and nearly mythological figures in the public consciousness. It isn't difficult to see why, if even a rogue cultivator NPC like SY* can mop the floor with most random muggers (*Shen Yuan is not a normal rogue cultivator). Not many people want to risk bringing SY's ire down on them, but of those who might chance it if he wasn't around to immediately react, even fewer want to risk that the kids themselves could kick their asses.

Not knowing that only two of the orphans probably could in fact mop the floor with them helps keep all the rest safer, and is more believable when all of them can conduct themselves enough like disciples to fool anyone who doesn't know what to really look for.

Developments that surprise Shen Yuan but wouldn't surprise anyone else who is paying attention:

People start leaving unwanted babies and younger children on his doorstep. Not all the time, but more than once has he had to frantically find wet nurses and worry that he's changed things enough that some fishermen might just randomly drop the protagonist outside his gate, and he wouldn't even know because Binghe would be a literal infant??

Nephew (SJ) and Little Yue (Yue Qi -- only Shen Yuan calls him "Little", especially when he gets taller than SY by the time he's sixteen) are prodigies who get really good at cultivation, really fast, and between that and Shen Yuan's OP skills they completely warp Shen Yuan's ideas for what normal cultivation potential looks like. This would probably cause more problems if he wasn't teaching all the kids how to cultivate anyway, but means his students actually do kinda run the usual range of skills for a small sect.

SJ and YQ swiftly reach the point where they need more advanced equipment than just SY's teaching can provide, if they're going to keep building their skills. Gaining access to certain tools, aids, and materials (like spiritual swords) is a real hurdle though, and usually is for rogue cultivators (one of the major disadvantages of no sect affiliation.) Shen Yuan is hesitant to use stuff from the plot, since it's For Binghe, but he eventually caves and starts going after some things that he doesn't think the future protagonist will miss much. He also ends up buying stuff from HHP, since they're willing to sell things like spiritual tools and weapons if the price is right, whereas most other sects like Cang Qiong reserve them for members only.

They get an invitation to the Immortal Alliance Conference. Not the one where the Abyss opens up, obviously, the one where (originally) Shen Jiu reunited with Yue Qi and killed Wu Yanzi. Shen Yuan debates on going but the boys really want to, and things have calmed down enough that no one's trying to burn down the school whenever he leaves these days, so eventually he figures it'll be interesting to see some of the Cang Qiong characters and should be safe enough if he keeps his disciples close.

They don't run into young Yue Qingyuan or Shen Qingqiu on the trip, but Wu Yanzi does show up and get killed, and SY only hears about it and assumes they just missed all that action. (WYZ just got caught by some senior cultivators who recognized him and killed him to avenge some disciples he murdered.) Nephew and Little Yue do meet young Liu Qingge, Shang Qinghua, Mu Qingfang, and Su Xiyan though! Which gives Shen Yuan the opportunity to tell them all (mostly Su Xiyan) that if they're ever in trouble near his school, they can come to him for help. Hint hint.

This open invitation ends up being accepted broadly by a lot of traveling cultivators after the conference, who from then on treat Shen Yuan's school like a free motel whenever they're passing through. Plenty aren't even people SY met, but it seems his statement was taken as a general one to fellow righteous cultivators all around! Luckily, this has some advantages. Shen Yuan has no qualms running off anyone who tries to take unfair advantage of him or especially his kids or staff, and no shame in conscripting anyone who is decent enough to help teach his students, even if it's nothing to do with cultivating, and somehow word gets around and people start bringing school supplies, medicine, food, or other useful things along with them as gifts to help repay the hospitality. Young Liu Qingge comes by a lot on his way to and from various quests, or even seems to just turn up randomly sometimes (he comes to challenge YQ and SJ to fights), and SY's just like "I guess this is happening now" and teaches him to recognize the early signs of qi deviation and advises strongly against meditating in caves.

At one point a young Shang Qinghua turns up in one of the spare rooms, very obviously hiding an ice demon. Shen Yuan again is just like "I guess this is happening now" and shelters them until Mobei Jun has recovered, and sends a message to Cang Qiong that one of their An Ding caravans was attacked and their disciple is recovering under his roof but isn't well enough to travel yet. Much less stressful situation for Airplane (who is desperately trying to figure out what he did to manifest SJ's benevolent uncle from somewhere???)

Su Xiyan seems like the only person they met at the Immortal Alliance Conference who doesn't turn up at their door in a state of emergency at some point.

A few years later, there is a big scandal involving her and the demon emperor. Su Xiyan disappears, Huan Hua Palace accuses Tianlang Jun of plotting against the righteous sects, and Shen Yuan is even invited to the meeting where they try and rally everyone to go kill Binghe's dad. Naturally, he declines to participate in the witch hunt, but the major sects agree to it. By luck (or narrative fortune) Shen Yuan comes across Zhuzhi Lang on his trip back home, and mentions the ambush and his distaste for it (not knowing who ZZL is). ZZL warns Tianlang Jun and the confrontation goes very differently, especially since there's no Yue Qingyuan wielding Xuan Su.

It doesn't go well for the sects involved. Huan Hua Palace gets decimated. The Old Palace Master gets killed. Shen Yuan is like uhhhh that's... whoops? Didn't Luo Binghe need that in the future?? Fuck.

But the sect isn't wiped out completely, they just take a massive beating. Some of their younger disciples end up leaving and turning up on Shen Yuan's doorstep, for some reason. The manor house is becoming too small to account for all of these foundlings! They have to expand. Though the expansions would be a stretch to term a "palace" they end up occupying a much larger chunk of territory, and even investing in farmland and some storehouses to help support the sect. That's still not really a sect, of course. Even if a lot of the business that would have normally gone to Huan Hua Palace starts coming to them instead. Once HHP is back on its feet the stream will probably dry out. Probably?

Zhuzhi Lang starts hanging around. He's actually looking for Su Xiyan or their baby, dead or alive and per Tianlang Jun's instructions, but he uses Shen Yuan's school as base camp for his kind of hopeless efforts to find any traces of them, while also looking for ways to try and repay Shen Yuan. All the kids are just like "oh great, another weird man has fallen in love with Shizun -- someone go run interference" about it.

Some years later, an older woman and her young son turn up. Shen Yuan's off on a quest at the time, so SJ receives them. As is standard procedure he gives the woman a job and places the boy in classes, after giving him the aptitude tests. The kid is cute and precocious, so SJ uses him to distract YQ while he himself sneaks out to go join LQG on a monster hunt (and claim the valuable parts of the beast's remains for himself), and neither SY nor ZZL notice anything until SY's going over the paperwork for stuff he missed while he was gone. Since he procrastinated, it takes him like a week to find out that Luo Binghe is finally under his roof. He's going over the admission form right when SJ arrives with The New Adorable Child to try and distract SY enough that SY will let him go on a solo hunt -- as far as being distracted goes, it is way more effective than even SJ anticipated.

Then he has to figure out how to let ZZL know, so that ZZL can let Tianlang Jun know, so that Luo Binghe will have more family than just his mom and more resources than just a shabby little not-sect! But even once he figures it out and sets up the dramatic reveal, TLJ is just like "great! so can he just stay with you? he's probably fine there" which... irritates SY.

SJ fully conscripts Luo Binghe as a minion in his many cons. He never lost his street kid conman tactics, although he now uses them less as a ruthless survival tool or weapon and more to just get things to go his own way. LBH has the face and disposition of a little angel, which SJ no longer can pull off as a full grown adult, so he fills a gap. LBH also knows full well what's going, especially since a lot of SJ's tactics involve throwing LBH at SY like a smoke bomb.

Luo Binghe inevitably still develops a big fat crush on SY, so this is fine by him. Especially when he gets older, he starts bringing SY tea and making him breakfast and running his errands until even SJ is like "wait a minute, this little brat's stealing my job!" and by then it's too late. Luo Binghe is SY's personal assistant, the disciple at conman puppydog eyes has surpassed the master! While SJ was busy being like "I'm going to trick this idiot into doing my chores" LBH was going "I'm going to trick this idiot into giving me his job".

SY takes too long to officially name his school so everyone calls it the Shen Sect, much to his embarrassment.

#svsss #scum villain's self saving system #shen qingqiu #shen jiu #scum villain #long post #bingqiu

[yeah-thats-probably-it]

Hot take maybe but I think Bertie would be FAR more likely to survive the first two months of Dracula than Jeeves would be. Bertie has a healthy sense of self-preservation. Jeeves consistently underestimates how dangerous a situation might get (Steeple Bumpleigh, the club book) because he’s overconfident about his level of control over any given situation. He'd handle Dracula masterfully if they faced off in England, but on Dracula's home turf? Much more doubtful.

I realize this might be a tough sell, so I will explain further (or it's not a tough sell, and I'm going to explain further because I want to). (criteria taken from @canyourfavesurvivecastledracula) Without further ado.

Would Jeeves and Wooster survive Castle Dracula?

Jeeves

Jeeves' survival will depend on how long Dracula finds him more entertaining than irritating. On that basis, I don't think he's long for this world. On the one hand, he has a huge wealth of knowledge about English society and culture that he can recite perfectly from memory. That should buy him at least a little time with noted teaboo Dracula.

On the other hand, he would be absolutely no fun as a vampire plaything. Jeeves cannot be got. Sneaking up on him while he's shaving will yield zero reaction (though that's at least good for his short-term survival--given that, although he DID take the crucifix from the old woman out of politeness, he certainly isn't going to wear it. The rules of fashion don't go out the window just because you're in a spooky castle). Then, although managing the whims of rich jerks is not an insignificant part of a valet's job, Jeeves usually does this by bending his employers to his will. Dracula is not the sort of employer this will work on. It'll just add insult to injury when on top of being impossible to scare, NOW Jeeves is telling Dracula that his favorite cloak is several centuries out of fashion and he's not allowed to wear it anymore.

Jeeves will 100% go exploring in the areas he was told not to go-- though to be fair, he MIGHT actually get away with this, what with his superpower of appearing in rooms without being seen or heard. Said superpower might save him from the brides as well (though this is by no means guaranteed). Since I find it doubtful that Dracula would come to rescue his annoying ass, not being noticed is his best defense.

There are a couple other things working in Jeeves's favor; the question is just whether they'll be enough to save him.

He DOES know shorthand, and could try to send coded letters. He might even have the foresight to squirrel away some extra stationary where Dracula can't find it. But could he get them posted? Would it even do him any good?

He certainly has enough cultural literacy to figure out what his new boss is pretty quickly. If he didn't chuck the crucifix out the carriage window, he might start carrying it around in his pocket.

Psychology of the individual, sure, but the individual in question is a 400-year-old vampire who lives in an isolated castle in a foreign country and is regarded as a terrifying mythological figure in the surrounding villages. Jeeves has never come up against anything this alien before, he's cut off from his normal resources, and opportunities to play people against each other are limited.

He probably has enough upper body strength from all that shrimping and fishing to climb the wall, so he COULD escape if he wanted to, if he survived long enough. It's just, again, that overconfidence, and also Dracula has a vast library full of rare old books that are entirely at his disposal. He's keeping his eyes and ears alert for potential escape strategies, of course, but I don't see him being as desperate to get out as Jonathan was.

There are just a lot of "depends on"s here, and I'm not convinced that luck would shake out in Jeeves's favor, all things considered.

Bertie

Bertie is so perfect for the job of Castle Dracula Prisoner it's like it was made for him. Think about it. Being held against his will in big manor houses comes more naturally to him than breathing. He's afraid of things that are scary. A lifetime of dealing with Aunt Agatha has made him the world's preeminent expert in "curl[ing] up in a ball in the hope that a meek subservience [will] enable [him] to get off lightly." He will NEVER go exploring in places he's been warned away from if nobody is forcing him to (Rev. Aubrey Upjohn's office notwithstanding. There were biscuits in there). He's both fun to talk to and easy to toy with (and extremely English). A+ prisoner. Dracula adores him.

In my opinion, Bertie is at Castle Dracula either because Aunt Agatha got some wires seriously crossed and thinks he’s going to meet an eligible potential bride (I mean, there are certainly brides there), or because Dracula has something Aunt Dahlia wants him to steal (far less likely, given that one of Dracula’s THINGS is famously not owning anything silver). Either way, he's shown himself entirely willing and able to escape down drainpipes if a sitch gets too scaly.

He DOES take the crucifix, and DOES wear it (which is what will save him during the shaving scene, because you KNOW he's going to jump a foot and cut himself like the dickens). He's read enough supernatural goosefleshers to be genre savvy about terrified old women cryptically pushing crucifixes into one's hands. I also think his sunny disposish endeared him to the villagers, and they were particularly vehement about urging him not to go. He doesn't speak German or Romanian, but he's empathetic enough to recognize Pure Terror. So by the time he actually gets to the castle, his imagination is already running wild and he's plenty aware that he is in imminent danger.

I think the biggest risk to Bertie will be the brides; whether or not he's susceptible to trances, if he thinks they're trying to marry him, it's against the code of the Woosters to turn them down. But that only becomes an issue if he comes face to face with them, which, luckily, I think is unlikely on account of the aforementioned "won't go exploring" (and if he did, Dracula would definitely rescue him).

I'm inclined to say due to his drainpipe-escape habits that he WOULD be able to climb the wall and MAY attempt to sneak into Dracula's room to look for the keys if his desperation grows to outweigh his fear. Whether he does or not, though, he does NOT have the stomach to attempt shovel murder, and therefore won't get magic brain fever, and may very well simply walk out the front doors when the people come to take the boxes away. OR he climbs his way out like Jonathan did. Either way.

When Bertie tells this story at the Drones later, Tuppy will say that no doubt it's been greatly exaggerated and all that probably happened was that he spent a couple months in an oldish house entertaining a weird loner.

#do YOU think jeeves and wooster would survive castle dracula? let me know in the comments! #they're in the castle separately instead of together because those are the rules ok #the isolation is key #though if anyone wants to speculate about what would happen if they went together i will NOT complain #i don't even know what's going on with the tenses in this post i'm sorry #// #jeeves and wooster #reginald jeeves #bertie wooster #dracula #do i need to tag dracula spoilers? #sure there are some people new to receiving letters from our good friend jonathan harker #here it is just in case: #dracula spoilers #i have done my due diligence