Eugene: You know archaic Latin?
Varian: I got bored with classical Latin.
Lance: You know normal Latin?
Varian: Yeah, someone from my knitting club taught me.
Rapunzel excitedly: YOU HAVE A KNITTING CLUB?!
Varian: You guys don't know everything about me. Now, do you guys want a sweater or a scarf?
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Garfield: I’ve been dropping them the most insanely obvious hints for like a year now. No response.
Y/n: Wow. They sound stupid.
Garfield: But they’re not. They’re really smart actually. Just dense.
Y/n: Maybe you need to be more obvious? Like, I don’t know… “Hey! I love you!”
Garfield: I guess you’re right. Hey Y/n, I love you.
Y/n: See! Just say that!
Garfield: Holy fucking shit.
Y/n: If that flies over their head then, sorry Garfield, but they're too dumb for you.
Garfield: Y/n.
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Varian: "Tea is just leaf water!" Yeah?! Well coffee is just bean water! It's like everything is just made of things! This door is a wood rectangle. This poster is just ink paper. THIS LEMONADE IS JUST LEMON WATER. Wow, it's like you can combine ingredients to make things that are more enjoyable than the initial parts of the equation!
Sure is a magical world we live in!!!
Eugene: The sarcasm in this is fatal.
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Varian, walking up to Hugo while he’s working: What are you doing?
Hugo: Making a bath bomb
Varian: …A bath bomb?
Hugo, handing him a glass vial: Mhm, you wanna help pour this in?
Varian:
Varian: …This is gunpowder
Hugo: And?
Varian: Aren’t you making a bath bomb?
Hugo: Yes
Hugo: You throw it into the bath, and it explodes on impact
Varian:
Varian: …I don’t think you know how bath bombs work
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incorrect quotes with pirate!Y/n
Varian: So
Varian: I’m inlove
Varian: with Y/n
Eugene:
Eugene: our Y/n?
Varian: Yes?
Varian:…Thoughts?
Eugene: and prayers.
Cassandra: You keep hugging Y/n when she’s upset
Cassandra: Next thing you know, she’s going to fall inlove with you. Is that what you want?
Varian: *scoffing* is that what I want?
Rapunzel: *loudly from the other room* yes
Y/n: You can’t make everyone like you, your not Varian
Eugene: but not everyone likes him??
Y/n: who doesn’t
Eugene:
Y/n: names, Eugene. I need names
Y/n: whaddya call a fish with no eye?
Varian, not looking up: Myxine Circifons
Y/n:
Y/n: fsh
Varian: you saved me, I owe you my life
Y/n: no thanks, i’ve seen it, not really impressed
Varian: I’m gonna need a human skull, and I can’t have you ask any questions why
Y/n: only if you also don’t ask why
Y/n: *takes out 7 human pristine skulls* take your pick
Varian:
Varian: this one is fine
Y/n: am I in trouble?
Varian: take a guess
Y/n: no?
Varian: take another guess
Varian: do you take constructive criticism?
Y/n: I only take cash or credit
Y/n: *kicks the door down looking panicked*
Varian: what happened?
Y/n: NOBODY DIED!?
Varian: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT??
Varian: you know im starting to regret showing you how a blender works
Y/n, drinking toast: why’d ya say that?
Y/n: the fuck your doing?
Varian: hugging you
Y/n: ew
Also Y/n: do it again
Red: Varian, what’s a thot?
Varian: a thoughful person
…
Rapunzel: here have some water, Red
Red: thanks! Your such a thot!
Y/n: *chokes on her drink*
note: sorry if its ooc😭 still trying to find a way to watch the series💞 but I won’t be giving up anytime soon!!
mermaid!Y/n headcannons coming up next!
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Hugo: A mosquito tried to bite me so I slapped it and killed it with my bare hands
Hugo: then I started thinking
Hugo: like it was just trying to get food😢😢
Hugo: what if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck open😢😢😢
Hugo: How would I feel😢😢
Varian: Hugo it’s 3am go to sleep you mentally unstable twink
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