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#is that? do i use that one for this?
bgech · 2 years
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Oogabooga, "viking pilot has liked ur post", how about fear straight into my veins?
Sneve is a funky guy I'll give him that,
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Sneve is a blaze, everyone knows this.
Sneve is a blaze, living primarily in the overworld, this is common knowledge.
Sneve, is always cold, this is no surprise but it sure is inconvenient.
The shadowlands where he's currently mooching off Shadow for housing, materials, food, money, anything really, is situated in a valley surrounded by snowy mountains. It's not exactly the warmest of climates. He'd have probably been fine if he could stay with Legundo instead, in the desert casino he runs, but Legs didn't want to deal with him, which is perfectly understandable to be honest.
He's a bit of a doofus and Legundo likes to Focus and Get Stuff Done, shenaniganary is welcome but only in strict moderation, he has a business to run after all. So he was made to live with Shadow.
Shadow himself is a curious case because Sneve is maybe sixty percent sure that he's a human. Or he was a human. For one, shadow is not that tall which is either just unfortunate genes or a point in the human department. For two, mans got skin. Withers of any flavor don't have skin, and Shadow seems pretty content to Keep Having Skin, so he was not born a wither. Maybe it will fall off, Sneve kinda hopes it does, that'll teach him to maybe light a fire every once in a while eh?
All this to say, Shadow is probably some sort of reanimated zombie corpse of a poor human lost in the nether eating something he shouldn't have been eating.
It's Sneve's best theory on why Shadow refuses to install any sort of heater in the house they share. There is a fireplace, technically, but it's in the cold, damp basement. Sneve has taken to sitting himself in a circle of torches just to get through the night without freezing to death. The cold does a lotta damage to a buttery blaze such as himself so if he has to look like an unfortunate virgin sacrifice of a failed ritual to stay warm, so be it.
It's actually gotten worse nowadays because winter comes a lot sooner in the shadowlands, so while everyone else is enjoying a nice summer or fall, sneve is sitting in that damned fireplace trying to do his best impression of someone who stays alive throughout winter.
He's not doing a very good impression of someone who stays alive throughout winter. It's not his fault, if it's anyone's fault it's Shadow's. Like, not everyone has skin to keep them nice and toasty during the first frost, ok? Not everyone has muscles and fat to keep them warm. Sneve is made of smoke, fire and broken dreams, got it? Mans gets cold.
So cold that his stupid idiot subconscious keeps trying to drag him somewhere Nice And Warm so he can sleep out the winter, which is apparently what happens when a blaze is taken and put somewhere it's not meant to be. He's woken up around torches he doesn't own or under blankets that aren't his more than twice. He's even somehow made it all the way to a portal before he woke up because of an unfortunate case of Beehive Underfoot.
He would be none the wiser to any of the reasons for this, blazes have no concept of family or community, just "defend the spawner", like a virus. The only instincts of blaze are to make more blaze asexually, copying the latest model and pasting a very slightly smarter version of it until something goes horribly wrong and Sneve has a conscience.
He's not great, as previously stated, a bit of a dummy at times but otherwise a scientific miracle. Sentience is something that he treasures dearly, though he has no cultural history or history at all when it comes to his kind.
Unlike say Legundo, who not only has the baggage of being a human guy abandoned sometime probably in his youth to be raised as a God among piglins because he's immune to the Sickness. But he also has all the issues of being a piglin living in a human body, someone who never understood the unsaid and unthought happening among his brethren.
Legundo is separated from his kind on both sides of his life, he's genetically a human but it all other walks of life he's piglin through and through. He doesn't have the voicebox to make the grunts and squeals that come naturally to his family, not does he have thick skin to protect himself batter against the dry heat of his home. But he grew up in the nether, he's adapted to very little water and hoglin steaks, mushroom stew too gritty or spicy for the average Joe to be able to stomach. The instinctual fear and inherent weakness of blue flame isn't part of him at all, but it's all he knows. Legundo feels the weakening, fully and truly even though he has no genetics to explain for it.
All this to say, Sneve has the opposite problem. He has no history to fall back on, he's the first of his kind, as far as he knows. There's no texts to research from, no teachers, no family to tell him what to do when it gets cold because anyone who he could consider his relatives aren't sentient at all. They're alive yes, smoking and smouldering in the fortress hallways and spawner cages, fighting for nothing but survival and continuation of the species, but they can't help him understand.
Sneve is alone in his plight to know what to do.
There's no rules, when anyone else gets afflicted by something unconscious they know how to solve it, they have rules to follow, plans to inact when they're feeling scared or lost or confused. Grady returns to the end, or wears a blindfold to calm the ever present dead of eye contact. Jamie takes charge just as her dragon ancestors did before her (even if her version of taking charge is a flawed monarchy dictatorship). Legundo works with gold and makes stew from his childhood, taneesha returns to the mountains, Nuke flies until the air is thin and he goes weightless, Fixx stays hidden, joy preforms magic while singing songs of the Raid, Mongo returns to the deep coral reef, all these people have ways, have coping mechanisms for when they Feel Things. Sneve has none. Sneve is not meant for feeling things, he's meant to prolong the survival of a species, not know or wonder or learn.
He's cold, and he's sitting in the fireplace while it burns around him. It's the closest he can get to feeling ok nowadays.
Blazes don't have faces, but Sneve does, something more to separate him from the others. He found a relatively nice material and fireproofed it using the first poor unfortunate mage he could find, sorry Joy. Then he drew a face on it. He had only seen a few faces at this point so he did his best, and it's wonky and honestly not great, the eyes are too big he thinks, but it's his face goddammit. His face is stagnant, it doesn't change with emotion, but he still hopes the glare he's leveling at Shadow across the room speaks volumes.
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It does, Shadow is not to be intimidated don't get him wrong, but good gods he's never felt more afraid of his roommate than in this moment right now.
The empty drawn on eyes and silly smile feel somehow threatening and he thinks he can blame the uncanny valley, Sneve's limp form crumpled in the fireplace set ablaze by a fire of his own cause. There's something so indescribably wrong about the way it's Looking at him, like it's looking not only at him but every choice he's ever made. He's being judged by a biblically accurate angel shouting in it's millions of voices "be not afraid" but the wheels of fire and infante eyes say otherwise.
...
Maybe he should install that space heater anyway...for no reason.
No reason at all.
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butchfalin · 6 months
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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dirtytransmasc · 7 months
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the men and boys are innocent too.
we cry "the innocent women and children" to appeal to the masses, to try and force their sympathy, but the men and boys are innocent too.
I have seen sons crying out for their mothers, their fathers, their siblings. I have seen them break down at the loss of their families. I have seen them cling to their dead and grieve.
I have seen fathers cradle their dead children, seen them kiss their faces and hold their little hands. I have seen them faint with grief when asked to identify the dead. I have seen them carry their sons and daughters. I have seen them fasting to provide what little they can for their families.
I have seen men and boys digging through the rubble with just their bare hands, I have seen them comforting strangers, playing with children, rocking them, hushing them, even if the face of such imminent danger. I have seen them cry, seen them grieve, seen them break down into each other's arms, seen them be selfless, beyond selfless, becoming something I don't have a word for.
I have seen the men who are doctors refuse to leave their patients, even when they have no medicine or supplies to give them, even when they're threatened with bombings. I have seen fathers who have lost all their children pick orphans up into their arms and proclaim them their child so they are not alone. I have seen men and boys digging pets out of the rubble.
the men are innocent too. the men and boys are being hurt and killed too. the men and boys are grieving too. the men and boys are scared too. the men and boys are fighting to save their people too. the men and boys deserve to be fought for too.
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greykolla-art · 3 months
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My blog has become infested with angst goblins, and they must be fed with some hypothetical scenarios!🙏💚
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stil-lindigo · 1 month
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
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inkskinned · 10 months
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because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.
you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.
you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.
don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.
if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.
you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:
how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!
aren't you happy yet?
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nikrei · 11 days
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I keep seeing people use this image as a reaction to people's original posts:
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Which I think is really incorrect, because with an original post they haven't come up to ur window, u've come up to their window.
So I made this, as a more accurate reaction for original posts:
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amalgamezz · 5 months
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ALT
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skyberia · 7 months
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workarounds to having a vampire as your partner in crime
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weaver-z · 10 months
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I do understand that "intelligence tests" are inaccurate and stupid. That being said, does anyone want to see the IQ test question so terrible that I felt I had to stand up and leave the room?
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autumn-may · 5 months
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Mostly spoiler free summary of my viewing experience
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bisexualpercyjacksons · 5 months
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pjo tv show episode 5 alignment:
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mumblesplash · 5 months
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(teaching my art class)
me: and what’s the number one rule when designing characters with wings? …well?
a handful of students, sighing reluctantly: no good fa-
me (interrupting them): NO good-faith attempts at realism, EVER. you want all the bird dweebs and physicists jumping ship as EARLY AS POSSIBLE so they’re not around to cinemasins your ass when you get to the cool parts of your story, and…ugh, what now, gerald
gerald (my least favorite student): why not just do some minimal research instead of-
me: listen you little shit i can and will singlehandedly tank your 4.0 gpa
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heedzhee-art · 12 days
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nice redstone gremlin
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hinamie · 7 days
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dead man walking
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inkskinned · 1 year
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
#this is true#writeblr#warm up#relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes#amongst the Siblings#is like - ''this is so good u will love it''#while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting#like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good''#to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good#(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and#like. we're GONNA try the new thing.)#edit to answer why we had so much vanilla:#my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house.#it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out''#even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter.#my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract#to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids#so like she was right to stock up#ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that#u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it#> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes#> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out)#listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9#when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it.#3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters#i am the middle child#out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite
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