#it was an abusive relationship tho like poor loki :( | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wxldchxld · 3 years

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🍎 : how stable is my muse’s mental health? have they been diagnosed with any mental illnesses and / or conditions? do they have any undiagnosed mental illnesses and / or conditions? do they or should they attend therapy?

🍇 : how would my muse describe their childhood? how much has it impacted the person they are now, or will become as an adult? around what age did they or will they start to mature, and why? do they wish to go back to their days as a child, or have they embraced adulthood?

🍌 : is my muse inclined to help others, or will they only do it when it benefits them, if at all? what makes them this way? has it ever gotten them into trouble, or inconvenienced them?

🍓 : how is my muse typically seen by others? does it ring true to who they really are? does their reputation matter to them?

🥝 : does my muse have any ‘ unusual ’ habits, interests, and / or talents? do they hide it, or are they proud of it?

🍋 : what kind of diet does my muse have? do they eat regularly, or the standard 2-3 meals a day? do they have to be reminded to eat, or are they likely to remind others? do they cook, or have others cook for them? do they eat healthily, or not so much?

Harper is pretty neurotypical. She does have some childhood trauma relating to her father leaving and her relationship with her mother. Her mom was an active service member and this led to a lot of instability in her childhood.

See Harper's mom and her grandmother weren't on great speaking terms. Her mother never told her father about the pregnancy, and that caused a rift between them before Harper was even born. Her mother also struggled with alcoholism when Harper was younger and while Harper was never abused, her mom did make some very poor decisions and her grandmother wasn't always sympathetic, usually blaming her mom for her bad choices with money, and then getting even angrier when her mom wouldn't accept help even as they were on the verge of financial collapse. This lead to her grandmother calling DHR and some very messy fights that Harper heard.

Harper didn't walk away from her experiences with poverty and family drama unscathed. Her mom did eventually go to rehab, and her grandmother did eventually try to make amends with her before she passed.

This isn't even touching on Harper's attempt to reunite with her father and his rejection of her or her mother's rejection when she came out to her as a lesbian.

So Harper definitely needs therapy, but I don't have enough knowledge to put the name of a specific diagnosis on her other than childhood trauma.

I think she would describe it as pretty average. Not necessarily pleasant all the time, but she figures everyone walks away from their childhood with some kind of problem. She is ok with talking about it, but she isn't really ok with reflecting on it for what it is. Normally when she talks about it she's very detached and purposefully cold.

I think the question about maturity is---not great? Like I could say Harper had to grow up fast and learn to do things on her own because of all the alone time she had---but that's not maturing. Even as an adult, Harper doesn't have a lot of emotional intelligence.

Beck had a lot of alone time as a kid and she has her own issues with trauma, but I do feel like her years in the wild, having her freedom and her happiness, gave her a lot of time to reflect and to grow up emotionally and to kind of decide how she at least wants to try to act.

This is in pure contrast to Harper. Harper's alone time as a kid didn't do anything but cause her more pain. Harper may not love how her mother acts, but it is one of her only models of behavior. She gained the veneer of maturity that comes with learning to suppress your feelings and get your shit done, but she had very little emotional intelligence. This is why she often resorts to yelling and mean comments when she's angry or hurt. And the fact that she essentially learned to never cry and to combat her vulnerability with anger and it helped her get where she is now in life did not help that.

All that being said no. Harper would not like to go back to being a child. She might want to go back to being a teen. At the time she had Beck, her first love, and she also had actual friends that appreciated her and liked her for who she was. That's not something she really gets anymore. Idk if it'd be enough to make her want to go back tho.

🍌 : is my muse inclined to help others, or will they only do it when it benefits them, if at all? what makes them this way? has it ever gotten them into trouble, or inconvenienced them?

Harper is inclined to help when and if it gets her her way and given that the payoff is good enough. She's pretty self centered and apathetic to the general plight of humanity. In Marvel verses she lives in New York at the time of Loki and the most she'll ever say about the invasion was it was an irritating distraction that caused an inconvenient amount of damage to the roads.

She WILL help the people she cares about with no boundaries though. If someone she loves has a problem or a need she will attack it tirelessly and ruthlessly. If they're in danger there is no line she won't cross to protect them. But there are very, very, VERY few people Harper would do this for. And not to sound cliché but currently all of those people are ---- well it's actually just Beck lmao.

The reason she's like this could go back to her childhood and her experience losing her grandmother but I'm honestly not sure it's that deep? Harper is kind of selfish. She dislikes most people and distances herself from them in order to not feel guilty for her selfishness. It's not a great look, but that's the current state she's in for any verse you'll meet her in. Sure this does change in stories where she has time to grow, but never enough to make her a humanitarian.

Also no this doesn't really get her into trouble. She's pretty safe on top of the world.

🍓 : how is my muse typically seen by others? does it ring true to who they really are? does their reputation matter to them?

Most people see Harper as a shrewd business woman and or a downright bitch. I won't lie and say they're totally wrong, but there is a genuine person in there and her flaws are usually exaggerations of the things that are good about her mixed in with her trauma. So yes, they technically see who she really is, but they lack the context to understand her fully. And she both allows and encourages this misunderstanding because it's advantageous to her. It helps her maintain control in the business world but also in the magical one. She employs and is followed by a lot of incredibly dangerous supernatural beings. Literal thousands of vampires, witches, and werewolves do as she bids and submit to her lead in large part because they respect her power. So she kind of has to let people think she's a bitch, but honestly she kind of likes it too. She has taken the label with pride.

🥝 : does my muse have any ‘ unusual ’ habits, interests, and / or talents? do they hide it, or are they proud of it?

She's a necromancer so... Like that's pretty weird right? Specifically her research is focused on creating the perfect vampire in hopes of one day turning herself into a vampire without losing any of her magical abilities or having to be vulnerable to "silly" things like sunlight and garlic.

She also really really likes snakes and reptiles in general.

I think Harper genuinely tries to eat healthy. She doesn't have any like sensory issues with food and while she isn't immune to worrying about weight, also doesn't obsess over it. I mean she doesn't have to because she spends so much time and energy on working she probably couldn't gain a pound if she ate a literal weight. Magic can be very draining, and she very often gets so focused she doesn't eat for hours. Then she feels sick and doesn't want to eat anything and she sure as fuck isn't about to cook.

This was one of the great ways that she and Beck fit together. Beck loved to cook and would drop by the office or the lab with snacks (so long as she didn't have to get near anything dead or nasty) and she always made enough dinner for two even when Harper said she wouldn't be home in time. And Beck eats pretty healthy (usually) so it worked well.

She does have a cook who makes meals for her. She usually takes them for lunch and if she remembers to will take a break and eat. Harper certainly doesn't cook. She thinks it is tedious and all too often has burned something because she was trying to multitask and forgot and nearly set the penthouse on fire.

Her favorite is when she gets the chance to eat with someone else that she likes. She absolutely adores French food and has a go-to place for meet ups.

#bet you weren't expecting a goddamn book lmao #i'm sorry i'm just really excited to talk about harper #bokketo

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ao3feed-lokiangst · 3 years

Text

He hates them

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/36DUQCm

by BloodThirstyAngel007

“it is us, the warriors three, may we enter?” Loki felt his eyes widen unintentionally as he held his daggers up, “what do you want?” “we wish merely to talk,” that was Fandral, his charm sounded forced but Loki opened the door nonetheless and pocketed his knives, “what?”

Or in other words Thor's friends are utter poop machines and Loki desperately needs a hug :D This is purely a self indulgent fic. I just wanted angst.

THIS WAS NOT BETA'D OR EDITED IT IS PURELY MY BRAIN AT 3AM AND AN ENDLESS SPAM OF WORDS

FIGHT ME

Words: 5367, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Characters: Loki (Marvel), Thor (Marvel), Odin (Marvel), Frigga | Freyja (Marvel), Sif (Marvel), Hogan (Marvel), Volstagg (Marvel), Fandral (Marvel)

Relationships: Loki & Thor (Marvel), Loki & Thor

Additional Tags: Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Has Issues, Sad, Bullying, Muzzles, There's A Tag For That, Protective Thor (Marvel), Odin (Marvel)'s A+ Parenting, Odin's Bad Parenting (Marvel), thor is kinda a good brother, but he still kinda shit at helping Loki out with his feelings, Loki has too many feelings, the warriors three are dicks, fandral is a doosh, Poor Loki (Marvel), Child Abuse, Abuse, Best Friends, honestly tho, thor has terrible friends, Headcanon, kinda canon i guess?, Pre-Thor (2011), Pre-Avengers (2012), Loki is too smol and just needs love, please give him love, caution it does swear, like many times, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, but he honestly kinda still is, Angst, Hurt, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I cannot think of anymore tags cus this is literally all angst... no fluff, Oneshot, oh shit it got dark fast, Self-Indulgent

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/36DUQCm

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #loki #loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #marvel cinematic universe #angst

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