#it would make SO much sense but the idea is sooooooo upsetting :( | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hyperactively-me · 8 months

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First of all: thanks for your service, the king!ghost au holds me in chokehold. Your writing is so beautiful!

What leads me to this: just imagine our princess has her first birthday in her new home, and Simon is trying everything to make it perfect for her, using everything he learned about her until now but somehow this day just makes her sad. Not because he isn't trying, but there is simply one thing missing what makes her birthday perfect, and that's her siblings.

thank you so much!! also, i smiled so big when i saw this request, the idea is sooooooo cute, love it sooo much!!!

As the day of your first birthday in your new home approached, King Ghost went to great lengths to make it a truly special occasion. He had observed and learned so much about you since you had moved to Kastron and became queen, and he was determined to make your first birthday in Kastron the best day.

The palace was adorned with your favorite flowers, and the grand banquet hall was filled with a feast of dishes you loved, as well as a giant birthday cake. He had a whole day planned out of fun activities that he knew you would love. He had taken you on a private picnic out in the palace gardens, took you on a boat ride through the lake, and you even went riding in the countryside. Throughout the day, he showered you with thoughtful gifts, each one carefully chosen to reflect your interests. Yet, despite all his efforts, there was a sadness in your eyes that he couldn't ignore.

Late in the afternoon, as the festivities continued, you found a quiet moment alone with Simon. He could sense that something was amiss, that your heart was heavy on what should have been a joyous day.

You looked into his eyes, your voice trembling with a suppressed emotion. “Simon, I appreciate everything you've done for me today. It’s been beautiful, and I'm extremely grateful for your thoughtfulness. But I just…there's something missing.”

Simon’s brow furrowed with concern as he held your gaze. “What’s missing, love? Tell me, and I will do whatever it takes to make it right.”

A tear glistened in your eye as you replied, “It’s…it’s my siblings. This is the first birthday I've celebrated without them…it just doesn’t feel the same without them.”

Understanding washed over Simon’s face as he finally understood what was bothering you all day. He pulled you into his arms, holding you close and gently wiping away your tears. “I'm so sorry, dove. If I had known—”

“No, no, it’s not your fault,” you whisper, clutching onto him. “You didn’t know. Today has been beyond perfect, Si. Everything you’ve done for me today, it’s been so lovely.”

You rest your head against his chest, taking a breath. “I just miss my siblings terribly."

Simon held you tighter, his love and understanding soothing your heartache. He runs his hand through your hair, pulling you into his lap. The moment you said you missed your siblings was the moment he promised himself that he would bring them here for you.

. . .

Once Simon finally had a moment of solitude, he wasted no time in seeking out his advisors. He immediately began devising a plan to expedite the arrival of your siblings to Kastron. After some diligent effort, the plan was set in motion; they would be arriving in five days. Now, it’s time to make it a surprise.

. . .

A few days had passed; it was the day your siblings were set to arrive. He had woken you up, a giddy smile etched on his face. All morning and all afternoon he was smiling at you.

“What’s with you today, Mr. Smiley?” you tease, squeezing his hand as you stroll through the garden.

Simon chuckled, his eyes sparkling with excitement. “Nothin’.”

“Simon Riley, don’t you lie to me,” you say, stopping in your tracks, feigning upset.

Simon turns around to face you, grabbing your other hand.

“Am I not allowed to smile in the presence of my beautiful wife?” he says.

You couldn't help but laugh at Simon's charming response. “You're allowed to smile all you want, but that's not just any smile, that's a 'I've got a big secret' smile.”

How perceptive you are.

Simon gave a playful sigh of defeat, his smile growing wider. “Alright, you've got me. But trust me, it's a secret worth waiting for.”

As you continued your stroll through the garden, you couldn't help but feel a sense of curiosity building within you. Simon's excitement was contagious, and you couldn't wait to find out what surprise he had in store.

He pulls a blindfold out, waving it in front of you.

“I’m gonna put this on you, okay?” he says, pushing your hair away from your face. You look up at him, confused.

“Ohhhkay, I’m a little nervous now. It’s not an important holiday, right? Or an extension of my birthday, is it? Everything you did for me was perfect, Si, if this is what this is about—”

“Darling, trust me,” he interrupts, placing his hand over your mouth gently.

You stare at him, the nod slowly. He chuckles at your widened eyes, bringing the blindfold up and over your eyes.

You grab onto his shirt, balling the fabric up in your hands.

“‘M not gonna let go of you,” he chuckles at you clutching onto his shirt.

“Please don’t, I will get scared,” you mumble, half-joking.

Once he finishes securing the blindfold around your eyes, he grabs your hand, pulling it around his bicep.

“‘m gonna take you somewhere, just hold on to me,” you hear Simon explain, his feet pulling you along as you start walking. You instinctively tighten your grip on his bicep, pulling yourself closer to him to feel more secure.

As the sun began to dip below the horizon, casting a golden glow over the garden, Simon led you to a beautifully decorated gazebo.

“There’s steps here,” he announces, taking your hand off his bicep, “‘m gonna pick you up now.”

“Okay!—” you shriek as he scoops you up into his arms as though you weigh nothing, carrying you up the steps.

With a satisfied grunt, he sets you down, holding onto your arm to let you know he was still there. Just then, the sound of multiple footsteps caught your attention.

“Ready, love?” Simon says, tugging at your blindfold gently.

“I guess so, yeah,” you say, excitement and nervousness thrumming through you.

With a single tug, Simon removes the blindfold from your eyes, the sudden brightness of the sunset spilling into your vision.

“Surprise!!” a cluster of voices cheer.

“Oh my god.”

Every single one of your siblings stood in front of you, smiles all plastered on their faces. Your breath was caught in your throat and tears immediately sprung in your eyes. Tears of joy streamed down your face as you rushed forward and embraced them tightly. “I missed you all so much!”

Your heart swelled with happiness as you hugged each of them tightly, savoring the familiar scent and warmth of your family. Your siblings, equally emotional, hugged you back tightly.

You take your sibling’s faces in your hands, peppering kisses on their cheeks.

"We missed you too! This is all thanks to Simon,” they said, looking at him with gratitude.

Simon gently smiled, feeling a warmth in his heart as he watched your tearful reunion. Seeing you so beyond happy made his heart swell. You turn towards Simon, holding the hand of your youngest sibling.

“I can't believe you all did this,” you exclaimed, wiping away the tears that flowed freely down your cheeks. “This is the best surprise ever!”

Your siblings exchanged knowing glances and grinned. Your oldest sibling stepped forward. “Well, we figured you've been working so hard lately, and with all the stress, you deserve a break and a little sibling love.”

One of your younger siblings chimed in, “And we couldn't pass up the chance to see the look on your face when Simon brought you here blindfolded.” You giggle at their words, tousling their hair.

Simon chuckled and wrapped his arm around your waist. “They all insisted on it.”

“Thank you,” you whisper to Simon, your eyes filled with appreciation. “This is more than I could have ever asked for.”

Simon shrugged modestly, the smallest hint of a blush coloring his cheeks. “I just wanted to see you happy.”

“Well, you succeeded,” you replied, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. Your siblings chimed in with teasing grins, clearly approving of your relationship.

“Oh, stop,” you turn to your siblings, a mischievous smile etched across your face.

“Go, spend time with them,” Simon whispers to you, squeezing your waist once before letting go of you.

You flash him a big smile and prance over to your siblings, grabbing their hands and yanking them from the gazebo.

“Follow me, everyone, I’ll give you a tour!” Simon hears your voice echo, faint laughter being carried by the wind.

Your heart has never felt more full.

- - - - -

(masterlist)

#simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost x you #simon ghost x reader #simon riley x you #simon ghost riley x you #simon “ghost” riley x reader #simon “ghost” riley x you #hyperactivelyme

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ikilledamanforthisurl · 1 year

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Minami Anonx7 If it helps Literally everyone I have known ever has brought up that I sound like a literal cartoon mobster henchman every time I call people boss so i've just embraced it now fully. Everyone is Boss To Me as I sling my guns goofily to Get Da Coppers. But I SEE…. i've been playing through the yakuza games chronologically I’m currently watching through y4 right now but id like to watch dead souls afterwards. It is extremely funny though the idea of watching them completely ramshackled out of order. Anyways. 1) I personally would love to play the minami centric side game also + I literally cannot imagine it’s anymore embarrassing a thing to want then me daydreamng abt the side game id like to make for my yakuza OC and 2) SOOOOOOO true I love it when Nishida and Minami are like sort of a awful duo together also I admire your like notes about M construction. I haven’t given it much thought yet on how it actually works but that’s mostly bc I have family who work in construction so I make myself laugh thinking Majima has no idea what the hell he’s doing LOL but anyways real…… Idk if you've ever read it but there’s an awesome fic on ao3 where it’s basically about how Nishida was also a prisoner of the hole and this like sort of implied idea or like at least smth I saw someone bring up before in conjunction idea that “Whilst Minami tries to emulate Majima Nishida actually IS like Majima in a way and the result of that has made him jaded/heavily desensitised” which i think adds a really interesting layer to the Relationship to think abt ep if it were canon. So this is why Desperately desperately I need a M construction side game I need something to focus on the majima family outside of him and honestly especially on Nishida…… tangent but there is so much interesting potential w him I want to see it explored !!!!!! Last note here but have u seen Minami's scene in RGG online before? I just found an English translation of it today and it had me very biting and chewing over A) Minami getting legitimately upset when his fake accent was mocked, not bc it was a slight against HIM but against MAJIMA and B) the sort of self deprecating mention he makes of what good is he if he’s not strong enough / good at smth before it immediately gets pushed aside by him and C) the implication that Minami is genuinely attached to Kamurocho/wants to protect it. If u havent i can try and find the post I saw abt it but. Much to think about

I HAVE SEEN THE RGGO STORY IT KILLS ME KILLS ME KILLS ME EVERY TIME. biting and chewing is a good way to describe it. have YOU seen the Nishida one? Minami shows up very briefly and i can practically already sense your reaction to his couple of lines (i grab and SHAKE him i shake him so much)

its so funny how hes so close to having any kind of depth and then he brushes it off immediately like "yeah this whole clan fuckup bothers me n has got me feelin insecure .lol lmao anyways". like as much as its kind of annoying as a fan of the character its also unfortunately realistic? EYE do that. you wouldnt catch me dead elaborating and having a nice rock-talk if my life was in the midst of being tableflipped. lol + lmao + anyways is the best you're gonna get

also, as a bonus tidbit before i go figure out how to format this idea for a tumblin post, this is half the setup for the Saejima teacher idea i was playing with ☝ because i already know RGG is NEVER going to put any meaningful spotlight on the Family members who've been essentially left to pick up their bootstraps with the big whoopsie of y7. sorry that i keep talking about it in code i dont wanna spoil nobody, in spite of not caring abt them myself i know others do 🙇‍♂️ i'm taking matters into my own hands and i am going to explore the IMPLICATIONS of the BIGGEST FAMILY POSSIBLY EVER going thru what it does. and i'm going to grab Minami by his non-existent shirt collar and i'm going to shake him around until he talks about how this affects him at least a little bit. i'll stop coding this in the Saejima Teacher plot post so you can decide if it matters 2 you or not and read up when i get to it btws

also your point about Nishida is spot on. you don't keep the kind of man who trembles at every conversation he has for that many years without breaking him down and making him (comparatively) jaded in such a stressful line of work. on top of that, Majima literally tests this man like its some sort of divine Greek-mythos punishment put unto him by the gods..... he's absolutely jaded underneath that shaky deadpan stare. Nishida may never outwardly resemble Majima, persona or the genuine self, but he absolutely rubs off on him and influences him heavily. this is the kinda relationship most Gokudo in the series seem to have with their bosses when they're worth a damn, Saejima was ready to walk to the ends of the earth for his patriarch due to the positive impact he had on him, and Majima likewise for his boss, though moreso in the opposite direction. not wholly..... Majima's priority of strength begets some kind of twisted respect towards Shimano. I wonder if he lacks that respect for Sagawa, who as far as I remember never physically overpowers or threatens Majima except for when he's already down and weakened in some form.......? getting off track. point is Oyajis are very very influential to their precious boys, their Family will reflect them (personality, how he runs the joint, etc) regardless if they want it to or not. Majimemegoro has some baller fics exploring all this and it's a large part of what influences me today.....

Speaking of, i would love the title of that fic you've mentioned... i'm a little picky of which fanfic i'll give the time of day but Nishida also having experience with Anagura is tantalising. like that's so tragic.... that's so evil...... i'm sitting here wondering to myself if he was a survivor or.. yknow........ because no one else, in canon, "made it out" of Anagura alive. or, more specifically, no victims make it out of Anagura. Majima was always the exception. either option makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it...... cause if he is another victim then the way Majima treats him is just.... and if he's not then is his constant dedication to him like a form of atonement....... oouuhhhrggg......... im going to hit the wall...........

also! i'd love to hear if you have any unique takes regarding M.Con considering your family...... when i say im pulling ideas out of my ass i mean it. you've got access to a unique perspective methinks. closest i got is other people's accounts and (shudders) ausgov roadworkers i see occasionally............

also also! when you get to dead souls please bitch to me the moment something goes awry i HATE-love dead souls.... the characterisation makes me stub my toe repeatedly in frustration. its not bad and i dont want to be the NO FUN ALLOWED twat but ugghghhghghrghrhgrhg the zombie setting is not handled in a way that engages me. thats all i'll say bc otherwise ill be here forever venting all my nitpicks that i SHOULD throw on twitter but wont bc i got hardcore DS dickrider mutuals who'll get sad in my mentions at best and maybe take it personally at worst

#ikildaman shut the fuck up #thank you for your service minami anon goon(getting me to speak at length #i love these asks its like a hop skip and a jump away from resembling a writers room #i love bouncing ideas off of ppl and getting new ones back....... joy joyous joy #i DO have a friend i could probably get away with doing this with but i think theyll get mad at me for making em read so much english LMAO #he puts up with my deranged bullshit enough as it is (and i am thankful #kuppi if you see this. kidding ik you wont but KISSIES!

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magalidragon · 3 years

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#4 or #5 for romantic one liners please and thank you 🤗

HOW ABOUT BOTH!? 🥰😭🤗 And even better how about both in the silent shadows universe!? AND WHAT IF I MAKE IT ANGSTY!?!?! (Moodboard to follow)

Sooooooo sorry it took me an age. 😭 I hope you like it even if if gave me perverse pleasure to torture the beans a bit.

Romantic One Liner Prompts

4. “Not to sound cheesy but your smile really lights up the room.”

5. “I cannot find the words to describe how I feel about you.”

Shadow watched her warily from his position on her bed, head on his paws, and his tail shoved underneath his back legs, eyes darting occasionally between her pacing form and Drogon sitting atop her dresser, hissing at him every few minutes. He was vibrating, nervous and keying in on her emotions, which were pouring off of her with every second.

Her frustration levels had exploded in one godsawful fight and she'd hightailed it out of Jon's house and to her apartment, not wanting to deal with him for another second longer. It wasn't her fault, she kept telling herself, speeding away from his house, skidding snow and melt, and exploding into her apartment at full steam, shouting how annoying he was, how much she was sick of his behaviors.

"I owe it to myself," she said to Shadow, passing by him again. Her fingers clenched into her palms, nails digging deep. "I mean, I'm the one who is going through all this stuff physically, right? The least he could do is just..." She growled. He was still holding back. He was still refusing to speak to her, keeping his emotions close to the vest, but they had moved beyond that. Or so she thought.

Instead of talking to her, instead of at the very least telling her he wasn't thinking the same, he'd shut down, he'd withdrawn into himself, and he had been spending most of his nights on "observation calls" with the wolves, deep in the forest, and not in their bed. "He has to stop doing that," she told Shadow.

She scrubbed her fingers over her face, exhausted, and sank into a chair in the corner. Her stomach hurt, her head hurt, and she ached every which way. It was the bloody hormones. The little notebook at her side, resting innocently on the end table, mocked her with its check marks and color-coding. Next week was their first egg retrieval and he'd give his sample. They were flying out to Essos in a couple days.

Or rather, they were planning on it.

Right now she had no bloody idea what was happening.

Leaning over her knees, she pressed her face into her palms, thinking back over the argument. It was so stupid. It was just over dinner. Dinner, of all bloody things!

He'd come home, to find her making them grilled cheese sandwiches, because there was nothing in the fridge and she thought he was getting something. He had texted her before leaving the sanctuary that he thought she was getting stuff. Annoyed, she snapped she'd just make something.

He tapped her shoulder when he came into the kitchen, even though she heard him and had ignored him. He picked up one of the slices of grilled cheese and smirked at her, biting into it and then signing. "Not to sound cheesy, but your smile really lights up the room."

She had been smiling, but not at him. More so at Ghost ,who was in the other room with Shadow, wisely sensing the tension. Jon laughed at his own joke, but she was not amused. She signed, angry. "You were supposed to get dinner."

"I thought that was you, I was busy."

"Busy? You're the busy one? You've been sleeping in the forest for the last week!"

He shrugged, continuing to eat. "Aye, it's breeding season, lots to observe."

"Breeding season?" She shouted now, slamming her hands on her stomach, which had puffed out because of the hormones. He flinched, not looking at her. She grabbed his face, jerking his eyes towards her lips so he could read them-- he wasn't getting out of it that easy. "Yeah it's breeding season Jon! We're going to Essos next week for the IVF and you've been hiding from me, not listening to me, and now you're making jokes like it's all fun and games?"

They hadn't even talked about the IVF.

That would require them to be in the same house at the same time.

So basically, he was avoiding her.

And she had been avoiding him, because he had been avoiding her.

His lips twitched, his eyes shuttering, and she lunged for him, but he was already turning away. "Don't you do that!" she shouted, although it was pointless, because he was already walking away from her. She grabbed his arm, jerking him around, furiously signing. "Don't you run away from me Jon!" Tears stung the corners of her eyes. "We have to talk about this! I decided to do this with you because...because I was ready but if you are changing your mind..." It had been three months since he ran into that hospital corridor, proclaiming his love and throwing himself at the mercy of her love, saying he wanted to be with her, he wanted a baby with her too, he was ready.

And now he was changing his mind, basically, or that's what it seemed to her.

He shook his arm free. "I'm not changing my mind! I've been busy!"

"Oh you're busy? Well so am I! Busy trying to figure out if I even want this baby with you now!" It came out before she realized it and she saw his face, the ashen color, and she hesitated. "Jon I didn't..."

He shook his head, sneering, and spoke, voice thick. "You feel that? You...I told you....I'm not..." He scrambled for the words and signed, his face a twist of pain and anger. "I told you!"

Told me what? She was so mad at him, she signed again. "I'm not staying here tonight."

"Fine!"

Shadow was out the door with her before she knew what was happening, and now here she was, lost and confused, and frustrated. Upset. Hurt. She blinked away tears, tucking her feet under her in the chair, sniffling back sobs. It was too late in Essos to call Missandei or Rhaegar. There was always Arya, but when it came to matters of Jon Snow vs. Daenerys Targaryen, as close as she was to Arya, she did tend towards siding with Jon. Since it was about...whatever it was about, she probably would stay out of it entirely.

There was Shadow, but as he was deaf, he couldn't' even hear her voice. He hopped off the bed, however and rested his chin on her knee, dolefully staring up at her. She scratched his head, whispering. "You're a good boy."

This was supposed to be different now.

Jon and her had different priorities in life, they'd realigned those. He'd gone to therapy-- was still going actually-- resulting in him being more open with her, more accepting. He still struggled, she understood that, she sympathized and she felt it deeply, but gods....he had to realize at this point in their relationship, she was there for him!

"He can talk to me," she mumbled, closing her eyes.

But what if he couldn't?

Her eyes opened and she blinked a few times, her heart hurting so badly it was bleeding everywhere. She missed him.

If he couldn't talk to her, then why? Was it about the baby? Was she pressuring ihm? She frowned, looking over her behavior, but then she shook her head, growling. No! It wasn't her! She had been more than open with him, more than understanding, and sometimes that was what drove her so crazy with the man. She had bent over backwards for him.

But she'd been passive aggressive the last week.

She'd been ignoring him too.

She took a deep breath and picked up her phone from the end table, staring at the screen. There were several texts from him.

Can we talk?

I'm sorry.

I don't want to do this over the phone.

I'm coming over.

You don't get to ignore me.

You've been ignoring me too.

Dany?

What the fuck. talk to me.

Fine.

Whatever that last one meant, she wasn't going to try to figure it out. She opened up the messages and sent him back a response.

I'm here. I'm not ignoring you.

She paused and took a deep breath, typing fast: I don't understand what is going on. Talk to me Jon. If you don't then I guess I know where I stand in the scheme of things. She closed her eyes and hit send, following up quickly with: I love you.

The instant she pressed send, her door rattled, keys jangling in the lock. Shadow didn't react, obviously, but the dragons did, Drogon and Rhaegal springing up and running to the door to see who had arrived. At their departure, Shadow turned and barked, taking a sniff and eyes widening when he caught Ghost and Jon's scents, rutning and greeting them.

She remained in her chair, waiting for him to enter. He did, a few seconds later, and he looked miserable. His eyes were sunken, his hands shoved in his pockets. He wasn't wearing a coat, the flannel shirt hanging off his shoulders loosely, his frame appearing thin to her. She hadn't noticed, but he did look like he'd lost some weight recently. He stared over at her and she waited, continuing to keep her hands still, although they itched to begin speaking.

"I cannot find the words to describe how I feel about you," he spoke.

Each time he spoke, stretching his vocal cords to their limits, his heart racing nervously because he could not tell what he was actually saying, the pitch and the volume, her pulse quickened, because it was his true voice, and he was vulnerable when he did it, his heart out in the open, offered for the trampling.

It made her melt, it was her favorite sound in the world, expect maybe his laugh.

It meant things were important, when he spoke to her like that.

She didn't move, her muscles locked, gaze intense on him. He continued, stuttering. "I...you make me..." He clenched his fist and pressed to his chest. "Hurt. Here." He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I...scared. Scared of it...so real now. All real. I...forget. Forget because I feel so much."

The vision of him before her wavered, tears filling her eyes, unshed. She knew what he was talking about. He loved her so much it overwhelmed him, it scared him, and he reverted back to the easy thing. To the forest, to his wolves. She lifted her fingers, folding them into the words. "You cannot do that anymore You cannot run from me."

He nodded. "I know."

"I love you so much Jon Snow. We are in this together. Both of us. it has to be both of us."

He pushed from the door and walked over to her, kneeling in front of her and covered her hand with his. She could see the pain etched in the lines therading from his eyes and around his lips. "I want a baby. With you. Only you." He hesitated and she struggled to understand, the emotion so thick in his words he was almost unintelligible. "I am scared. No going back. I forget you...you want me."

Her hands went to his face, cupping it in her palms, and she spoke, crystal clear so he could read her lips. "I want you more than anything in this world Jon Snow. I love you and I want this baby with you." She hesitated and continued. "I am sorry I ran off tonight, but you make me...I can't read your mind and I don't deserve it when you push me away. Again." And again and again.

He nodded quickly. "I know. I'm so sorry. I just..." He shrugged, helpless. "My whole life. NO one...wanted...me."

It killed her, that he had been so locked away after his accident. No one saw him as anything but that deaf boy, shuttered in the attic, locked in his silent world, just his wolves. And her.

"I want you," she signed. She smiled. "All of you."

"i know."

"Then stop closing me away Jon." She bit her lower lip, shrugging sadly. "Because I cannot risk the pain of what is going to happen to us if we aren't in it together."

He nodded, but she didn't think he quite understood. He seemed so certain that this would work. They would fly to Essos, they'd go through the procedure, and a few weeks later they would have a baby, but she knew better than to be so hopeful, so certain. She was cautious about it. It was the only way to protect herself.

Just like running away was his.

She brushed his hair back behind his ear, curling it around her finger, speaking out loud again. "I'm sorry I ran away too. We can't do that."

"No, we can't," he signed, agreeing.

They would figure it out. She fell into his arms, both of htem sinking to the floor, embracing tight. He kissed her neck, face buried in her hair and she did the same to him, swaying lightly in his arms. She loved him so much it hurt. It would always hurt. The good kind, she thought. She pulled her face away and stared at him, his pain and fear still evident in the furrow of his brow and the pressed line of his lips. She touched her fingertip to them, shaking her head. "You will be a good father Jon. I want this with you. Only you."

It had been easy in the beginning, to say that she would do the donor sperm, because she wanted this baby. Now she couldn't think of anyone else as the father of her child. Not some nameless entity in a test tube. It had to be Jon and only Jon.

He kissed her gently. His hand came up, signing. "I only want this with you too."

They kissed, deeper this time, the emotions surging inside of them, the hormones raging in her. It had been weeks; she'd been so scared of potentially messing something up and they had a stopping point. Mel told her they needed to refrain from anything a week before, part of the protocols. She hadn't had to worry about it the last time, since she'd been doing it on her own, but now she needed him desperately, especially if it was going to be the last time for a week.

He lifted her up from the floor, easily carrying her over to the bed and depositing her on it, breaking away from their furious kisses long enough to shut the door on a nosy Shadow and Viserion, who were trying to sneak back in. She giggled, reaching up for him and leaning back, head lightly hitting her pillows and traced his cheek, scratching at his bristly beard. He smiled gently. "I love you so much," she said.

"I love you." He rose over her, touching his nose against hers, breathing deep. His hands found hers and squeezed, stretching them up over her head, his lips brushing down her cheeks, to her chin and began tracking down, letting go of her to begin plucking at her clothing, while she remained in place, hands up over her head, eyes fluttering shut.

A few hours later, she tapped his heart, lifting up to rest her chin on his chest, peering up at his face, which was tilted up to the ceiling, watching the moonlight play shadows through the open window. She took a deep breath and sighed. "Jon," she said.

He didn't move and she closed her eyes, taking a deep breath, speaking out loud, to nothing really. "Jon I need you to do this with me. I can't do it alone. We're in this together. You and me. No more running away and I won't either. We're making a baby together. We're going to be parents. I love you more than anything, but if this keeps up, I can't do this. It isn't fair to either of us. I know you can't hear me, but I want you to know, and I hope you can understand."

There, she said it.

She lifted up a little farther, looking down at him. His eyes flicked open, a smile lazily pulling over his lips. He turned a little closer to her, and his voice was raspy, breaking when he spoke. "You are awake?"

She smiled and nodded. He smiled again and fumbled some signs. "Do you want to go see some pups?"

Eyebrows lifting, she shrugged and let him pull her from the bed. They dressed and he drove her, Shadow, and Ghost out to the sanctuary and they rumbled through, coming to a stop before one of the gates. He opened it and they started walking in the darkness. He was oblivious to the creepy crunching of their feet on dry leaves, the occasional hoot of an owl, and even fainter, howling from a wolf in the distance.

Ghost and Shadow moved with the darkness, flashing here and there in the trees, like their namesakes, and she held Jon's hand as he led her through the brush, until they came upon a huge oak tree with a marker on it. He crouched and picked up a flashlight, flicking it on and handing it to her. He crept a little closer and got down on his stomach, waiting a few moments. The brush rustled and she held her breath, a massive gray wolf appearing, focusing on him.

He stared at the wolf and after a moment, the wolf's tail wagged and he approached, licking Jon's hand and bowing his head in deference. Jon stood and went with the wolf and a few others from the pack who came out. He disappeared and a few moments later, he emerged holding a wiggling bundle. She stood and carefully approached. The wolves stared at her, obviously nervous at the interloper, but not moving because their alpha was trusting her.

Jon passed the bundle to her and she smiled, holding the warm creature, squeaking and wiggling in her arms. It was still so small, these majestic creatures large enough to take down grown men and jaws as strong as steel, and yet here in her arms was this helpless little creation, fine downy fur a thin layer over its short limbs, ears barely flipped over, and eyes still shut. She took a quick glance and noted the pup was female, wiggling into her, nuzzling and searching for her mother, crying out and eventually settling when she grew tired.

She stroked the little pup, eyes closed, and Jon took her back a few seconds later, returning her to her mother. A few minutes of checking on them, bringing out another-- this one a little brown and gray one with a curled tail and one eye half open-- to nuzzle against her, they said their goodbyes to the pack, who appeared relieved to see them go.

It was magical, she thought, walking back with Jon to the car.

She stopped in her tracks at one point, letting go of his hand.

He turned, frowning. "Okay?" he asked.

She took a deep breath, signing, the moonlight bright enough for him to see. "I told you earlier, but you...I didn't want you to hear me." He stiffened, knowing that meant she was talking to him. She hated doing it, but she wanted him to know. "We have to be strong Jon. We can't run away. I'm serious. If this keeps up...." She trailed off and sobbed, letting it linger. SHe didn't want to say it.

He tilted her face up to his, thumb brushing her chin. He nodded. "I know."

"I love you," she whispered.

He wrapped his arms tight around her, squeezing, and said nothing, but she knew. She exhaled, relieved. It was just a bump, she told herself, just their constant struggling. They had to work on it. It wasn't supposed to be easy.

They had the rest of their lives to look forward to, she thought, letting go of him so they could walk back to the car. She squeezed his hand tight. They were going to be parents. That would be the hardest thing, this was just a blip. Just a little shadow.

They would be fine. They were having a baby after all.

Just another month and they'd know.

Jon lifted her hand to his, kissing her knuckles, and she smiled, leaning against him and closed her eyes, walking back towards the car, feeling hopeful.

#Jonerys #jonerys au #jonerys fic #My fics #silent shadows #I made it angsty I’m sorry but I’m not because they get a happy ending in the fic lol

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nad-zeta · 4 years

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Hello dear! I love your works and I wonder if I can ask for head canons of the warlords with an MC that doesn't want to be pregnant, she's a NoMo modern woman, but she feels insecure about the warlords looking for another wife that wants to have their babies due to the time period they're living, the warlords just to be really disappointed with her or they just dumping her (since it also happens in the future sadly) thank you!!!

Hi hi, love!❤❤🔥 Thank you so much for the request! ❤Sorry for taking sooooooo long with this!😱 Also, side note I believe that whether you want children or not, the warlords would love ya unconditionally no matter what! ❤Also, I only did this for 3 of the boys! Let me know if you want me to do it for the rest. Hope ya enjoy and I hope you have a good day!❤❤😊

Headcanon: MC not wanting to get pregnant feat: Mitsuhide, Kenshin, and Nobunaga

Mitsuhide

You have been feeling nervous all-day ಠ╭╮ಠ

Today was finally the day that you were going to tell Mitsuhide that you were a NoMo modern woman and you don't ever want to get pregnant

(ーー;)

The two of you have been in a long time relationship and rumours were starting to floating around saying that the sneaky Kitsune was planning on proposing to you that night

⚆ _ ⚆

The Kitsune had legit gone all out ᕙ(⇀‸↼‶)ᕗ

You walked into his garden to see a romantic candlelit dinner, surrounded by flowers and tealight candles ≧☉_☉≦

Some of his vassals were even playing some light romantic music in the distance to create a more romantic atmosphere ρ（ーoー)♪

You walked down the makeshift aisle of rose petals leading to the table

And spread out on the table, was a feast of all your favourite foods

(◍•ᴗ•◍)♡ ✧*。

TBH you were on the point of tears, you knew warlords needed an heir and the romantic setting wasn't going to make this heavy conversation any easier (ಥ_ʖಥ)

You had convinced yourself that this was your last night with the kitsune that you loved so much, and that after tonight you would most likely find yourself single once again (つ﹏<)･ﾟ｡

Mitushide saw the strained look on your face and the redness of your eyes desperately trying to hold back the tears （>﹏<）

He started to panic thinking that perhaps you didn’t love him after all, and that you didn’t want to become his wife (|||❛︵❛.)

He plastered a smile on his face to disguise his nervousness and anxiety, and guide you to your seat.

He had decided to give you some time to calm down and open up to him on your own (≖ᴗ≖✿)

As the night progressed, and the two of you became more and more anxious when finally Mitsuhide decided it was time to rip off the bandage ◉_◉

He stood up and walked over to you and crouched down on one knee

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

Before he could even ask your hand in marriage, the well of tears broke and you were now sobbing into your hands (つ﹏<)･ﾟ｡

Through hiccupping sobs, you managed to get out, “I’m sorry Mitu, but I have to tell you something, I don’t want to get pregnant, I can’t give you an heir, I understand-“ ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

Before you could finish your sentence, you found yourself in Mitsu’s warm embrace, “Little mouse just being loved by you feels like a dream, I never hoped to ever have children, much less find the love of my life. If you do not want children, then that is perfectly fine by me, just as long as you are forever by my side, I am happy.” ( ‘́⌣’̀)/(˘̩̩ε˘̩ƪ)

He then wiped away your tears and gave you a small kiss on the lips, “I know I am undeserving of love, much less the love of such a sweet, wonderful little mouse, but I find myself unable to push you away. My dearest, will you let me love you for the rest of my existence? Will you make me the happiest man alive and become my one and only wife?”

( ° ᴗ°)~ð (/❛o❛\)

You smiled through the tears and met him in a passionate kiss, whispering that you loved him and would love nothing more than to become his wife

(｡◕‿◕｡) (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )

The two of you lived a life full of bliss, and Mitushide never pushed you to have children and never took another as his wife, staying loyal to you from the moment you met

♡｡ﾟ.(*♡´‿` 人´‿` ♡*)ﾟ♡ °・

The two of you did, however, did have children as Mitushide’s little fox had found herself a partner, who had left her alone and heavily pregnant

The two of you took up the role of parents with the little fox and raise 3 sweet fox kits as your own

Of course, your little fox kits was incredibly spoilt as the two of you cuties doted on them like crazy (♡´❍`♡)*✧ ✰ ｡*

Kenshin

This bunny boi was living in pure bliss with you (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

Although soon after your marriage to the bunny lord, his clan members started pestering the two of you for an heir (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)

Kenshin had begun to notice as the weeks progressed that you would avoid conversations about growing your family at all costs |ω・）

Until one day as you were petting one of your fluffballs, you started to talk to him

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

You were feeling the weight of the world resting on your shoulders with people telling you from all directions that it was your duty as his wife to produce an heir (ノ#--)ノ＼。゜。

“Umi I don’t know what to do, I don’t want to be pregnant” a tear slipped from your eyes

๐·°(৹˃̵﹏˂̵৹)°·๐

As if sensing your sadness the other bunnies started gathering around you and nuzzling into you

(ㅇㅅㅇ❀)

Umi stood up in your lap so that he could nuzzle your face, except he was a bit too small, so he settled for nuzzling into your neck (⁎˃ᆺ˂)

You chuckled slightly through the tears, at the cute fluff balls trying their absolute hardest to comfort you, “You know what my biggest fear is, that he would l-l-leave me” you were now full-blown crying at that thought of Kenshin leaving you or taking another wife to give him children

‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

What you didn’t know was that Kenshin had been listening outside the paper door the whole time and his heart broke into two ｜−・;）

His hands trembled as he slowly opened the door and announced himself

༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

The second the rabbits heard him, an avalanche of fluff ran to him and started pushing him toward you with their tiny noses as if to say, go and comfort her (•ㅅ•) (ㅇㅅㅇ❀)

（╯°□°）╯︵( .o.)

Kenshin sat down in front of you and cradled your face in his hands, you didn’t dare look into his eyes ༼ つ ಥ_ಥ ༽つ

He wiped away the tears that were streaming down your face with his thumbs

Your voice shook as you tried to speak and repeat to him what you had revealed to your fluffy army “Kenshin I-” (ಥ﹏ಥ)

Kenshin then pulled you to fall against his chest and he wrapped his arms around you in a tight warm embrace, “Foolish girl, did you think I would leave you over something so insignificant.” (づ￣ ³￣)づ

You let out a sob, and he started to nuzzle into your hair and rub soothing circles on your back ( ‘́⌣’̀)/(˘̩̩ε˘̩ƪ)

“You are the love of my life, my soulmate and I love everything about you and if you do not want to be pregnant and have children then so be it,” he said all while kissing you and nibbling on your ear, in hopes, to bring that smile back (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )

“But your clan....” he then sweetly kissed your lips to cut you off (◠‿◠✿)

“My clan is of no concern, they have successfully pulled me away from a loved one before and they will not have the chance to do it now” (≖︿≖✿)

He then places your hand on his heart, “This is yours my love, and it will always be yours and yours alone, I have no need for children when I have you in my arms.” (｡◕‿◕｡)

“Besides we already have a colony of cute fluffy children to care for, these little trouble makes keep up busier than any child ever would.”

You gave a small chuckle through the tears as the bunnies started cuddling the two of you the second they were mentioned by their beloved god of war (ㅇㅅㅇ❀)

After that, no one ever mentioned anything about an heir again, as anyone who dares make his goddess of war upset were to face the wrath of Kenshin and your loyal bunny army

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

Nobunaga

The two of you cuties have been married for almost two years now

( ° ᴗ°)~ð (/❛o❛\)

Nobunaga was in the final stages of unifying the country and his clan members started getting impatient with the two of you, for not having produced an heir yet (；一_一)

And TBH, Nobunaga had been bringing up the topic of children more and more lately (°ロ°)☝

A topic which you had managed to easily avoid up until this point

Both you and Nobunaga had been so busy, him with unifying the country and you with your designing business (˶◕‿◕˶✿)

You were one of the biggest clothing producers in japan (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

You had started a business which hires woman in need and teaches them the skills needed to care for and provide for themselves. ( ಠ ͜ʖರೃ)

They would use their newly learned skills to fill commissions and earn some money for themselves.

It was a concept from the future, a woman being independent and not relying on men for anything(◕‿◕✿)

Nobunaga loved that you were a strong independent woman, and supported all your ideas with an open mind (✪‿✪)ノ

But now it was finally time to rip of the bandage and tell him about the fact that you just didn’t want to be pregnant cause you were a NoMo modern woman (人◕ω◕)

That night as the two of you was cuddling in the futon together, Nobunaga had brought up that his clan had been pestering him about needing an heir more and more as of late (;￣ー￣川

He narrowed his eyes at you, as you scrunched up your face (-∧-；)

“Why do you look so displeased at the idea fireball,” (´･ω･`)

You remained silent, your mind going into overdrive, you loved Nobunaga so much, and you were so scared that he would take on a second wife or leave you for not wanting to get pregnant (つ﹏⊂)

He pulled you closer to him and peer into your eyes questioningly waiting for your answer ب_ب

You looked down, a small tear escaping your eye as you told him about your modern woman ideals (ಥ_ʖಥ)

He listened patiently, and his heart broke a little, at the fact that you had been carrying this burden on your shoulders for so long ༶ඬ༝ඬ༶

There was a thick silence between the two of you as you had finished your story

Nobunaga thought for a second, processing this new information until he finally broke the silence, “Foolish woman.” (≖ᴗ≖✿)

That was the only thing he had said before capturing your lips in a deep, passionate kiss. (づ￣ ³￣)づ

It conveyed all his love and affection for you

(っ˘з(˘⌣˘ )

When the kiss ended both of you were left breathless

Nobunga leaned his forehead against yours, “Now smile for me my sweet fireball, for your beautiful smile is worth more to me than anything else. If you do not wish to have children then I will break the news to the clans tomorrow.” (◕‿◕✿)

He could see what you were thinking and gave you another kiss, “Fear not my queen, I shall never bed another woman, and I have no interest in remarrying. You, my dear fireball, are the only keeper of my heart and the only one whom I will forever love.” (◍•ᴗ•◍)♡ ✧*。

Keeping true to his promise Nobunaga spent the rest of his days completely devoted to you.

Although the two of you did become parents and provide the clan with an heir.

As one day, you and Nobunaga had stumbled upon an abandoned street child whose parents had been killed, and you instantly fell in love with the small boy (◕‿◕✿)

The two of you decided to adopt the boy and raise him as your own.

And the three of you lived happily ever after

(人◕ω◕)

Hope u have a wonderful day❤

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chachkayes · 3 years

Text

You Matter To Me - Mer x Hayes

Sooooooo..... @herrera-n-hayes gave me an idea good enough to make a Bad Idea part 2, so here’s that. The Waitress title theme is going to probably run rampant on our pages for the next little while, so get excited for that. Here is the link to part one, titled after the Waitress cheating anthem “Bad Idea” (obviously). I’m really proud of how this fic turned out, and I hope you all enjoy!

---------------------------------------------------

Cormac Hayes rested his eyes as the woman lying next to him slept peacefully. He listened to the quiet sounds of her breathing, as she rid herself of the day’s hardships. Her arm and head lay still on his chest, while his arm was wrapped loosely around her waist. He tried his best to shut off his mind and enjoy the peace and quiet, but his brain couldn’t stop racing. He couldn’t pinpoint what exactly he was thinking or feeling, but he couldn’t stop it. After 15 minutes of laying in complete silence and happiness, Cormac finally fell asleep too. For 30 minutes, he and Meredith slept peacefully in each other’s arms. And for 30 minutes, everything that was wrong in the world had seemingly been put on pause. Everything finally felt right for the first time in a very long time. That, of course, was until Andrew DeLuca walked into the very same on-call room where Meredith and Cormac slept.

Andrew had just finished helping his sister in her office, seemingly the only other doctor in the hospital who didn’t hate him after word spread quickly about what he’d said to Meredith. She certainly wasn’t very impressed with him, but she couldn’t hate her baby brother. He was on-call that night, and figured it would be best if he got a nap in, since he was tired and knew to sleep whenever he could. What he wasn’t prepared for, was to walk into the on-call room and be met with 2 scrub tops on the floor, accompanied by Cormac and Meredith fast asleep on each other on the bed nearby.

Cormac was woken up by the sound of the doorknob twisting, but he kept his eyes firmly shut, praying that the person about to walk in was anyone other than Andrew. Meredith was unroused by the sound. Luck clearly wasn’t going to stay on Meredith and Cormac’s side today, as the door slammed shut and was followed by a very loud and angry “What. The. Hell.” From none other than Andrew DeLuca. ‘Damnit.’ Cormac thought to himself as he opened his eyes. He glanced over at Meredith for a moment, to see her wide awake, staring at Andrew.

Andrew was pissed – and Cormac made the unfortunate decision to stand up and put his scrub top on. He began to say something to try and diffuse the situation so Meredith wouldn’t get hurt, but before he could even get a word in, Andrew grabbed Cormac, slammed him into a wall and punched him – hard. “Andrew, please, no.” Cormac could hear Meredith say through tears. It seemed like Andrew was getting ready for Cormac to hit him back, but that never happened. He refused to become violent, especially in front of an already distraught Meredith. “Please, leave him alone.” She cried. As Andrew continued to punch Cormac, his mind wasn’t focused on defending himself, the only person he was concerned about was Meredith, and as long as Andrew wasn’t punching her, he would take it until he could get a word in and get away. His heart broke more and more as Meredith got up, sobbing while putting her scrub top on.

Cormac finally threw his hands up in surrender as Andrew threw another punch and cursed in Italian. The more he got hit, the worse Meredith’s cries got. He couldn’t stand hearing her in so much pain, and as much as he wanted to put the blame on himself, he just knew that would cause more punching and hurt Meredith even more. “Listen, pal,” Cormac started weakly, before he was rudely cut off. “Don’t you even think about calling me pal right now.” Cormac rolled his eyes. “Shut up, seriously.” He rebutted. “She was upset, rightfully so, and I followed her in here to make sure she was okay. She just used me for some temporary pain relief, that’s all. It didn’t mean anything.” Slowly, Andrew backed off. Cormac finally looked over to Meredith clutching her chest, bordering on hyperventilating. That one look to her was enough to set Andrew off again, and another punch flew. Cormac closed his eyes, bracing himself for whatever was about to happen, until he heard Meredith grunt and grab Andrew by the collar, flinging him away from Cormac and slamming him up against another wall. “Get the hell off of him!” She yelled through tears. Cormac took this as his chance to get out of there, but he stayed close by in the supply closet next door, in case Meredith needed him.

“You have no right to be so upset, Meredith. Seems to me like you’re actually really good at getting over people pretty fast.” Andrew glared at the woman in front of him, and she glared back. “I’m only saying this once, so listen up. You were the first man I ever trusted enough to love again after Derek, and that’s saying something. I never thought I’d ever in a million years feel love for someone again, or say I love you to another man. But YOU messed that up. YOU told me you felt inferior to Derek. Then to take some space. Then, that you didn’t love me or need me. And yet, I got back together with you. But then you told me to forget about Derek. You don’t get to tell me I don’t have a right to be upset, and you certainly don’t get to determine how ‘good I am at getting over people.’ That’s not up for you to decide. Yes, I was able to forget about you for the whole 2 hours we were in here. I wanted to. That was all I wanted to do, was to forget about you for a little while. And it worked. But I could NEVER forget about Derek. He was the love of my life, and is the father of my children. When you said that, when you told me to forget about him, you broke me. You broke my heart. I don’t regret a single thing I did in this room with Hayes, and I refuse to apologize for how I chose to repair what you broke. So, we’re done. Stay the hell away from me, and from Hayes. I don’t want to hear your apology when you finally come to your senses.” Without missing a beat, Meredith turned around, exiting the on-call room and leaving Andrew standing there, stunned.

As she left the on-call room, her thoughts immediately drifted to Cormac. She frantically searched the hallways trying to find him, but it didn’t take long before she found him looking for gauze in the supply room next door. He caught her gaze as she slowly entered the room, tears in her eyes as she looked at him bleeding. “I… I’m sorry. I’m okay, I promise.” He told her as Meredith closed the door behind her, grabbing some gauze off the shelf. “No, you’re not okay, Hayes. You’re bleeding and you’ve got a nasty black eye forming. And don’t say sorry, you didn’t do anything wrong.” She reassured him as she placed the gauze on his face, causing him to wince. “Alright, come with me.” She said, holding out her hand. “Where are we going?” He asked, confused. “To the ER, to get you stitched up and to get some ice on that eye.” He avoided grabbing her hand but started walking towards the door with her following very quickly behind. When they reached the ER, Bailey and Link looked at Cormac in horror. “Dr. Hayes, what the hell happened?” Bailey called out to her chief of pediatric surgery. “DeLuca.” Meredith responded. Her eyes were bright red, stained from tears. Bailey didn’t have to ask any further questions to figure out what had happened. “Page Andrew DeLuca to my office right now.” Bailey said as she walked quickly away, looking back to Link. He nodded back at Bailey, then looked over to Meredith. “Hey, Mer, need a hand?” He asked. “Thanks, Link – but I’ve got it.” She called back to him as she closed the door to the previously empty trauma room.

Meredith immediately went to work, grabbing a suture kit and handing Cormac an ice pack to put on his eye.

“You weren’t temporary pain relief.” Meredith finally spoke up, after what felt like an eternity of silence. “What?” Cormac asked her, confused. “You told Andrew that I just used you for temporary pain relief, you said it meant nothing, but that’s not true.” They locked eyes, neither one of them wanting to take their gaze off each other. “Then what was it?” He said, eyes still locked with hers. “It was something that’s been a long time coming. You and I both know that. You did so much more for me than just help me forget about him for a few hours. You made me feel safe, beautiful, happy, and peaceful. You reminded me of what I deserve. You saved me from myself. You’re not just some rebound, or temporary pain relief. You matter too much to me for you to be anything other than someone I genuinely want to be with. Our time together meant everything to me, Hayes. You’re everything I never knew I needed.” Meredith finished, placing a small kiss on his lips. “When he was hitting me, I hardly even felt it. All I could focus on was the sound of your cries. Hearing you sob the way you did broke me more than DeLuca ever could have.” Cormac told her as Meredith’s hand rested on his cheek. He was lucky that he came out of everything relatively unscathed, aside from the multiple cuts on his face, the slight pain in his jaw and the black eye that was quickly forming. It definitely could’ve been much worse. A tear ran down Meredith’s face as they stared at each other, and Cormac wiped it away with his thumb. “Like I told you, you matter to me. And it broke me to pieces, seeing you being hurt.” She said.

“You matter to me, too.” He told her. “By the way,” He continued, a smirk forming on his face. “I heard you yelling at DeLuca from the supply closet. Gotta say, Grey – it was hot.” Meredith began laughing through her tears, and with her hands placed at the back of his neck, she kissed him. He smiled and laughed into the kiss as well, and his arms wrapped around her body, resting on her lower back. They pulled away from the kiss and Meredith immediately pulled him in tightly for a hug. When they finally let go of each other after who-knows-how-long, Meredith leaned back into Cormac’s grasp and grabbed one of his hands that was sitting on her back. She smiled as she grabbed the ice pack off the bed beside Cormac and placed it in his hand. “Alright, Dr. Hayes. Keep that ice on your eye. Wouldn’t want that handsome face of yours to get too bruised up.” She winked at him. Cormac smiled at the woman in front of him who was teasing and complimenting him at the same time. “God, how am I going to explain this one to my boys?” He said, lightening the mood once more, causing the both of them to laugh with each other about the situation, happy to just be happy together again.

#merhayes #cormac hayes #merwidow #grayes #meredith x hayes #hayes x grey #meredith x cormac #cormac x meredith #hayes x meredith #mcwidows

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astrologysvt · 4 years

Text

MTL to be Protective

Anonymous said: MTL likely to be protective over their friends/loved ones?🙏

i think all of them are going to be protective! i think what really differentiates who is up higher and who is lower on this MTL is who is more quick to actively protect, and who is more a “pick your battles” type or sees being protective more as being a source of comfort for their loved ones.

Most

Seungcheol: his leo is super possessive, and he has his own little “pride” of people he wants to protect and care for. that cap moon also really sees it as his responsibility. will probs handle it maturely thanks to that cap moon not being one for petty moves, and his libra mars is going to make sure he’s in the right before acting. but that LEO is going to make his point absolutely clear.

Hoshi: he is very reactive with that gemini but also easily distracted, but that leo rising doesn’t take it lightly if someone thinks they can get away with disrespecting his loved ones. his gemini/aqua influence also gives him a strong set of principals, so if someone were to breech those he’s going to do something about it and will fix his attention towards getting to the bottom of it.

Jeonghan: so that libra is very indecisive in how he wants to act and very restless in moments of discord. but that placement also makes him love to dote, and mixed with his scorpio mars that is really possessive/attached to his loved ones makes him very protective. his aqua moon is square his scorpio moon making him very principal focused yet reactive, and so he’s going to be PISSED if someone messes with his loved ones.

Wonwoo: his cancer sun is sooooooo invested in his loved ones, and while he expresses his protectiveness more in being doting and caring, his leo placements really come in and switch things up. he’s gonna wanna assert that these are his people, and if he’s gonna feel at all justified to act out of anger, it’s going to be for the sake of his loved ones.

Vernon: he’s super levelheaded with his moon trine mars, and this aqua placements make him pretty discerning and objective in terms of disagreements. he’s not going to be angry if he can understand where the other person is coming from. with that being said, his aqua values friendship and his scorpio moon loves having people he considers his “circle.” if someone messes with that and is completely in the wrong, he’s gonna be mad.

Jihoon: he hates the idea of letting someone know they’ve gotten to him. but that scorpio sun has his people he’s very accountable for, and that aries moon can make him pretty easy to provoke. he’s going to remain calm, but there is a breaking point with him. he’s calculating in how he’s protective, and it’s going to be more symbolic in how he retaliates but booooy is it gonna be scary.

Minghao: while he is certainly very protective and feels a great deal of responsibility for his loved ones, he’s also very practical. he’s going to be very similar to jihoon, but he’s a lot more rational about it. if someone messes with his loved ones, he’s going to get to the bottom of it but more so to make sure they’re okay. (lol also i think it goes to show how protective they all are when the scorpios are mid-tier).

Jun: this guy is so loyal with his taurus influence, he’s really so dedicated to the ones he loves and will do what he can to ensure that they are taken care of -- whether that’s offering emotional support, comfort, or protecting them. his aries moon also makes him pretty ready to put himself out there for the sake of his loved ones.

Seokmin: this guy is very gentle in how he protects and that cancer moon really grows so attached to the people he finds comfort in. he’s going to stand by them, and to a degree even blindly. then his moon is square his mars and, while he’d still be pretty passive, having someone treat his loved ones unfairly is gonna deeply upset him. his mars sextile pluto also adds this deep sense of investment on his end.

Mingyu: he is so earnest in his love and dedication towards others with his aries sun and pisces moon. he cares so deeply and his aries gives him this great urge to protect and act on behalf of his loved ones, and that taurus adds a great sense of stubbornness in this regard. but his pisces moon is very sensitive and that in and of itself can kind of inhibit his aries from acting. would much rather care/nurture.

Dino: he’s going to take things in stride, and independence is a huge factor for him in relationships. while his scorpio mars makes him potentially protective/possessive, he’s going to place a greater emphasis on giving his loved ones space. not only that, but i think his pisces influence means he’s going to be more gentle in how he protects.

Seungkwan: so the capricorns are going to be towards the bottom not because they’re not protective, but because they’re just so practical. if they’re protective, they really express it in how they provide. seungkwan is more protective in the sense of doing what he can to maintain a stable dynamic in his daily life, and ensuring that his home life/family life is safe and taken care of.

Joshua: similar to seungkwan, he’s more focused on maintaining stability and comfort. that taurus is super loyal so he’s certainly affixed to the people he cares for, but his afflicted moon makes him pretty slow to action and he isn’t the most clear in how he’d move to protect. it’s easier for him to focus more on comfort, as well as being the person who stands by his loved ones.

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iguessilovebakugou · 6 years

Text

I Wouldn’t Mind || Happier Pt 2 || Requested by you lovelies!!

// Not sure why so many people wanted a part two of this but...I guess we’re going for it, boys.

Someone mentioned an idea that I kind of just fell in love with over time sooooooo.....Just so everyone knows this was heavily inspired by a few songs.

First was Satisfied from Hamilton. Second - and what finally broke me down into allowing this to become what it is because I was very much against it - was I Wouldn’t Mind by He is We. Third is I Found by Amber Run.

Part 1 || Part 3!

“Hey. This is Hitoshi Shinsou. Leave me a message and I’ll-”

It was beginning to worry you. 15 calls over the past week, plenty of text messages. And yet he still ignored you. Was he really that pissed off about you running out to go try and help Bakugou? He did talk to you after, visiting you in the hospital with some movies for you to watch so you didn’t “die of boredom”. He looked worse for wear, decidedly so and left not too long after that. He didn’t seem...angry - and he decidedly wasn’t the type to just simply up and ghost you. Shinsou wasn’t that petty...

Was he?

This was too stressful. Simply put, you had just straightened out one issue; the last thing you wanted was to jump head first into another one that seemed just as strenuous and just as thought consuming. You groaned and tossed your phone onto the cushion beside you, relenting and slouching further against the back of the couch. You crossed your ankles on the coffee table and your arms against your chest, closed your eyes, and let out a deep sigh.

You didn’t want to over think this one. If Shinsou wanted to be a jerk and ignore you because you wanted to help someone you cared about Bakugou, then fine. Be petty. Be salty. Be the god damn Dead Sea for all you cared. It’s not like you did anything wrong. He was the one trying to use his quirk to stop you - which was also against school rules if anyone needs to be reminded. So it’s not like both of you didn’t break rules to try and protect someone else!! And he wanted to be scrunchy because of that??

You didn’t want to feel guilty. You shouldn’t feel guilty! You had every right to be upset that you were being ghosted, stood up, ditched!! If something as simple as you trying to explore your feelings was enough to drop you like a bag of rocks, should Shinsou really be considered a friend? If he didn’t want you to be involved with Bakugou not that you were, that situation was developing, he shouldn’t have told you. He shouldn’t have brought it up. He should have left it buried in the dirt. But he didn’t! He told you! He was the one who brought it up and started the avalanche that had been the past few months. So why is he upset with you? Should you be beating yourself up over it? ...not like you were, it’s fine everything was fine. You were fine. He was fine, you were fine, everything was fine.

Everything was fine...

Everything was definitly not fine.

Your shoes slammed against the freshly paved sidewalks, trying to find the dorm for General Studies First Years. Your chest was starting to hurt, your mind racing with all the possibilities of where you screwed up in the relationship. It was hard to see the numbers in the moonlight, and the street lamps did nothing but cast shadows upon the large houses. Perfectly groomed bushes rose up and curled against the houses, adding even more darkness to an already hindering state. But still, you had to try. You had to find the building so you could just figure out what the hell was going on. You could talk to Shinsou, he would laugh, you would laugh, and then you’d try not to cry because you were stronger than that.

You know you needed to relax, to keep calm and play it off like you were simply in the neighborhood. But you were panicking - you didn’t want Shinsou upset with you. You didn’t want one of the best friendships you’ve ever had sucked down the drain and not know exactly what it was you did wrong. You wanted to get everything straightened out, fixed and moved on your way. You didn’t want to go through anything else without your best friend by your side...

There was only one building that seemed familiar by the layout Momo showed you. While all the buildings were identical, it’s placement and the flowers were what set it apart. Red, purple, and orange mums had been planted for the fall season, a few pumpkins placed on the steps where the tea lights buried inside were dimming or long since snuffed out. You could still smell the melted wax and burned wick in the air as you made your way up to the front door.

...and you stopped. The entire run over, through all the panting and desperation to get here, you realized that you had no earthly idea what to say to him. How were you going to explain your panic, your worry, that something was wrong when you held no evidence that something was even amiss? Nothing besides your gut which - let’s be honest - hasn’t really been working in your favor recently. You considered for a moment simply turning around and leaving; walking back down those steps and making your way back to your dorm before anyone noticed you were missing.

Your spine stiffened when the door clicked open, pulling away from the frame so a girl about your age could look out at you. The two of you stared at each other, she eyes your jeans, sweatshirt, and just how heavy you were breathing. You were trying to place her face among the sea of other students you passed in the halls daily - sadly, she wasn’t ringing a bell. Though judging by how hard her brow furrowed, you could tell instantly she knew you - and probably didn’t care too much for you.

...was Shinsou talking about you to his classmates? Was he that mad at you? ...no, they...they didn’t really talk to him. Most were afraid of him because of his quirk, which is why he had been sitting alone at lunch. And while things had gotten better since the Sports Festival...

“What do you want?” Her bark snapped you out of your thoughts.

It took you a moment to respond to her overall prickly disposition. You didn’t want to linger in her presence for longer than you had to. “Uh,” You started, before kicking yourself hard in the ass. “Is...Is Shinsou in?”

This question seemed to surprise her, the anger slipping away if only for a moment. “He doesn’t want to see you.”

...he didn’t want to see you? What? Why? What was wrong? “Look, could you just tell him that-”

“I don’t care who you are.” God, she was like a tiny little chihuahua, huddled behind the door for safety yet still snarling her heart out. “Your class has brought us enough trouble, so just leave us alone.”

...excuse you? The hell did you ever do to her? The hell did your class ever do to her?

You only had a second to collect your nerve as she prepared to slam the door in your face. She really didn’t like you. You shoved your arm through the door, keeping her from shutting it fully. For extra measure, you even slid your foot inside. “Look, I’m not here to start anything! I just want to talk to Shinsou! It’s-”

“Get out before I call the teachers!!”

“Could you just tell him to call me!? Please, it’s really important and-”

You heard a familiar voice calling your name. And that was it. You can’t remember if you did answer. But you figured you must have since when you woke up you were laying in the mums just outside. Purple eyes stared down at you and soon, the large messy hues separated to form Shinsou’s face. He looked like crap: He had a few scratches and scrapes but mostly ugly green and purple bruising forming on his knuckles and arms - something you didn’t see often on him. He watched you for a moment before asking simply, “Why are you being so loud? It’s late.”

You groaned, rubbing your eyes and pulling your feet up, ready to push yourself onto them after you got your senses settled. And after your ears stopped ringing. “Really.”

“What?”

“That’s really what you’re going to say to me right now?” You glared at him, dropping your hands on your stomach.

“I wouldn’t have to say it if you weren’t screaming and trying to break in like a lunatic.” He let out a groan, settling back on his butt in the damp grass. “Shouldn’t you be resting anyway? You passed your Provisionals, right? You should be celebrating with a well-deserved rest.”

“Yeah, well...” Fuck, your head was pounding. Was it normal for his quirk to hurt like this after being used? “I would be able to sleep if you would answer your damn phone every once in a while.”

“I’ve been busy.”

You really wish he hadn’t said that. You really wish he hadn’t been honest. You really wish that he didn’t come downstairs and do whatever it was he did. “Fuck you Shinsou.”

He fell silent. You...had never said that to him before. At least not without some sort of laughter quickly following it. He eyes you, watching your breathing pick up again. You looked awful. You had switched the cast on your arm out for tape, your cheeks were becoming gaunt from lack of eating, your eyes were bagged from lack of sleep. Not to mention the newly formed cuts and knicks from the exams. You were pushing yourself harder than he knew possible. He swallowed the lump in his throat, shaking his head. “Damn it. You look like crap.”

“...” You didn’t answer him, focusing your gaze on the stars above you. You don’t know why your eyes were stinging, or why you were so mad...maybe it was because he had refused to answer you for days now. Maybe it was because your entire left side felt like shit and your head was pounding. Maybe...maybe it was because of how stupid you felt. He had been busy and here you were, jumping at the gate like a damn puppy. He had things to do. Meanwhile, you were being urged to settle down or threatened to be expelled every time you and your class turned around. It was a bad idea for him to keep you so close. He had the right idea.

And yet...

“...I wish you would have answered me.” You grumbled, smoothing your hair back.

“Like I said, I’ve been busy.” His tone was softer now.

“Doing what?”

He watched you closely. You couldn’t see him, but you could feel how strained that gaze was. He didn’t want to tell you. It was a secret. Your best friend in the entire fucking world couldn’t tell you what he had been doing or why he had been avoiding you for weeks now. Was he mad? Was he sick of you? Had he moved past you? Or was it your fault? Were you so focused on Bakugou that you had completely forgotten about him? He looked different somehow. Rougher and...did he gain some more mass? Have you really been so wrapped up in yourself that you didn’t notice his changes? Was that why he had stopped? You couldn’t really blame him. Some friend you were.

“It’s nothing.” He finally said, his fingers rubbing the arms of his sweater. “Just some extra stuff.”

“...why can’t you tell me?” You asked him. You two were friends. He had your back through all the shit that you had been going through. With school, with Bakugou, with life, with your...whatever the hell all this panic was. He was there for you. And as pissed off as you were at him, fuck him if you weren’t going to be there. You were going to be the best damn friend he could ever want. From now on, it was all going to be him. Whenever he needed it. But what if he didn’t want you? What if you were stepping on boundaries you shouldn’t be even looking at?

“I was told not to.” Those bright eyes met your gaze, “But I will. When I know it’s okay, you’ll be the first person I tell.”

“...Promise?” You probably sounded pathetic, probably looked worse too. Your nose was red and you couldn’t stop sniffling. Your eyes were puffed and your breathing heavy and labored. You were spiraling down, you needed to know that he didn’t hate you.

Shinsou watched you, eyes widening for just a moment. It clicked for him then that you weren’t just being dramatic or fishing for something. This was a legit panic. You had the terrible habit of wrapping yourself in your own ideas and turning them into reality. And, in trying to do what he was told, he inadvertantly sent you rolling down the many little winding and jaggeding roads your mind had the bad habit of making. Like he said, “personal, malfunctioning wrecking ball”. He sighed, a smirk crossing his face. “...I’m not dying,” He reached out and poked your forehead. Establish contact, let her know that you still want her there. “It’s just some extracurricular stuff. Nothing life-threatening. But I’m under specific orders to not say anything.”

Extracurricular stuff? What sort of Extracurricular stuff did the General Studies do that made it look like you went toe to toe with All Might and lose? You blinked and pushed yourself up onto your elbows. “Like...how soon will I be able to know?”

He shrugged, resting his arms on his knees. “Don’t know. Not my call.”

You duck your chin close to your chest, eyeing him. With the way he was looking now, you didn’t like the thought of what these “extracurricular activities” meant. But... “They’re going to help you become a hero?” You ask.

“Yep.”

“...alright then.” You reached up and wiped your nose, sniffing one more time....and coming away with blood. You pursed your lips for a moment, studying the red against your skin. “....Huh.”

“....Oh yeah,” He perked up, “You tripped coming down the stairs. You might want to not get up just yet.”

Well, that explained why you were on the ground. And why the side of your face was in pain...and your ankle felt sore. You relented, falling back against the grass. “Yeah, probably a good idea...”

A moment of silence passes before you feel Shinsou shuffle and move next to you. You move your arms, allowing him to comfortably lay down. With a shift and a soft sigh, he reached out a hand which you happily took. The two of you were in this together it seemed. Still as thick as thieves. As you lay there, on that damp grass, staring up at the stars you thought that maybe this is what peace felt like. And after that, you smiled. It had been exactly what you needed.

“Hey, have you been working out?” You ask.

“Noticed that did you?” Shinsou replied.

“Noticed it? You look like you could break a walnut between your forearm and bicep.”

You were his best friend. And sometimes, it felt like you were his only friend.

He listened to you ramble on to whatever songs were floating inside that brain of yours. You were an oddity, never scared or fearful of his quirk. The two of you could sit quietly on each other's beds, looking over your phones before finally noticing that it was growing late and it would still be a perfect night he wouldn’t trade for the world. Your legs would be in his lap while you would play video games on the television in his room, and while he acted annoyed when you would put your foot in his face to cause him to lose, he was still happy. Happy to have a friend who didn’t care that he could take over with a single word. Happy that someone trusted him right out the gate instead of having to prove that he wasn’t some sort of villain. Happy that you could see his potential when even he lost sight of it.

“You’re better than you think you are! I know it and I’m never wrong about these sorts of things.”

“Did you see how many people were impressed by you?! What do you mean it was all a failure? You were amazing!!”

“You are your own worst critic. You’re spectacular, the world is just taking a little bit longer to see it.”

You could annoy him, you could be completely silent, you could laugh just the right way, you could look at him and his heart would sputter. Your eyes would sparkle so bright the stars were put to shame. Your smile could light up everything around you. Your hands would grab his and he knew - he just knew - that’s where they were meant to be. He wanted to hold on just a moment longer. Wanted just to tell you that no matter what, you made him feel...something.

He wasn’t sure what that something was, but it was enough to make him try harder. To push himself further. And when he would look at you, when he would see you lose yourself in thought, watch you spin, watch you trip over your own words, his stomach would twist. When your eyes would fall to your feet or your teeth would find your bottom lip, he wanted to be there. When the world seemed so big, he wanted to protect you until it was just a bit smaller...

Before UA, Shinsou Hitoshi wanted to prove to the world that he could be a hero. Now? He just wanted to be your hero.

...so why the hell did he tell you about Bakugou?

Because you were his friend? Because he didn’t want to believe that he liked you that way? You were his first true friend and he didn’t want to lose that. Not when everything was finally starting to look up. Maybe in some sick way, he wanted to gauge your reaction. Maybe he wanted to see if you would laugh or if you were somewhat interested. Either option was terrible and lead to no resolution. Either you laughed and that meant maybe somewhere down the road he could explore his feelings. Or you liked Bakugou and he had to watch you think about, fall for, and love someone else. Anyone but him.

...he should have just kept his damn mouth shut.

But your reaction - while entirely like you in hindsight - wasn’t expected. You seemed...terrified. He might as well have told you that Nezu himself was thinking of expelling you from school grounds. His stomach twisted as he watched you try to brush it off and hide your red cheeks behind your hand. He had to read your texts trying to explain it all away. And as you sat on that park bench, Shinsou realized the three things he never wanted to know:

Firstly: You liked Bakugou.

Of course, you did. Not like the guy didn’t have the personality of a pit viper, but...it made sense. Both of you were determined. Both of you took challenges head-on. You both impressed at the Sports Festival. He gave plenty of shit and you didn’t take any of it. You were cool where Bakugou was a raging ball of hellfire. What was it they said? Opposites attract? You balanced each other in ways that seemed almost cookie cutter romance. If you had a novel written about you, high school girls and middle aged housewives alike would swoon and buy copies and analyze every portion of your relationship.

[Incoming Txt::] Just got back to the dorms! I’ll see you tomorrow at lunch! And no ditching me this time!!

Secondly: Shinsou absolutely hated it. He hated the way you worried about him. How you started to worry about your looks and how you worried about what he would think. He hated how you would start to wrap yourself around him, trying to figure out what each little look or word meant. It wouldn’t be no time at all that you started inviting him to join you out instead of him. Soon, Shinsou would be forgotten, replaced. Left alone. You would love Bakugou...

[Outgoing Txt::] Wouldn’t dream of it.

[Incoming Txt::] I will hunt you down if you do

[Incoming Txt::] so...I think something happened with Bakugou. =/ He’s just...sitting in the kitchen. And he hasn’t moved

Thirdly: He would do whatever it took to make you happy. If you were happy, then so was Shinsou. You two were partners, you were his best friend and he would do anything for you. And if that meant you and Bakugou get your happily ever after, then so be it.

[Outgoing Txt::] You should talk to him. Let him know you’re there for him.

[Incoming Txt::] You think?

[Incoming Txt::] What should I say?

[Outgoing Txt::] idk. You’ll figure it out

[Incoming Txt::] 😂😂 You’re so helpful.

[Outgoing Txt::] Go get him, tiger.

He knew he was hard to deal with...among other things. He knew that he could be an asshole. He knew that he rubbed people the wrong way. He knew that he scared most he came across. He knew all that.

Bakugou was hard to get along with. On one hand, he was boastful, he was filled with pride and spite and cruelty. He would kick someone down when they were at their lowest if only to prove that they had farther to fall. It was hard to explain to anyone on the outside - but you were starting to believe the only reason he did this was to help people grow bigger, taller, stronger than they had originally believed them to be. But on the other hand, he couldn’t stand being beaten. If there was even the possibility that he wasn’t the best, wasn’t the greatest, wasn’t the strongest, fastest, smartest...

It was rare to catch him in moments of quiet. When he only had himself to contend with. When he only had the silence to question him - which was the worst possible contender. The silence left you with nothing. It asked you questions that you could only second guess as it gave you no leeway. It gave no response.

And you broke that silence. You in all the ways he didn’t know existed, broke the heavy quiet for him. In a million, sharp and jagged pieces. It was infuriating and it was mind-numbing. No matter what he did - push you away or try to drag you in - nothing seemed to work. You were behind a wall, only appearing to shatter whatever defenses he put up while he couldn’t even dent yours. It was infuriating, watching you galavant about and know that no matter what...

You’re not worth the trouble. If she found out you weren’t as strong, imagine what she would think. Damn it damn it damn it. You can’t do to her what you did to All Might. All Might wasn’t your fault. You will never be good enough for her just give up now!!

“You know, I’m not a doctor, but I would probably say that if you continue gripping your hair like that you’re going to cause serious damage to the scalp.”

At first, he thought he was just imagining your voice. Bakugou had ensured that the entire kitchen was clear before taking shelter among the stainless and cool steeled appliances. But as he looked up, there you were. Your sweatshirt was damp, your head cocked to the side, and your smile doing little to mask the concern on your face. You did that though - smiled through the worst of things.

“Shut the hell up.” He snapped, running his hand down over his face to rub the bandaged and sore cheek.

“Though, by the looks of you, I would say someone else did a rather good job at it already.” You didn’t falter under his glare. Instead, you pulled out the chair opposite him. “Let me guess: Deku looks worse?”

...of course, you knew. And tomorrow morning, the rest of those damn nerds would know too. Which was fucking fantastic, exactly what he needed right now. Still, at least you weren’t saying anything more about it, keeping what little you did or didn’t know to yourself. You must have heard them when they were walking in. Though it did little to explain the state you were in, Bakugou didn’t feel like asking what exactly you had heard. He closed his eyes tightly. “What the hell do you want?”

You didn’t answer. You instead watched him with soft eyes, lips thinning for a moment. The quiet settled over him once again, and this time, it didn’t seem like you could do much to stop it. It was like a heavy winter storm, rolling in and covering everything in ice. It wasn’t like you could ever understand. How would you know how it feels? He had worked so hard to get to UA: Trained until his fingers bled, studied until he got sick from exhaustion, prepped and prepared until he knew every answer to every test that UA could throw at him. And yet, he hadn’t been enough. Deku - hell, everyone in the class - was rushing past him, leaving him behind and there wasn’t anything he could do to stop it. And while that wasn’t his fault, he was left figuring out how to overcome it. He would have to train harder. Start with retaking the provisionals, then a harder training regimen. Maybe more studying and-

“Honey or lemon?”

The anxious music skipped to a halt with the sound of a chair sliding back. Bakugou opened his eyes and focused on you, catching as your stood and pushed yourself up. You didn’t look at him, making your way to the cabinets and starting on getting out two teacups. You were...making him tea. He was suddenly hit with the night you all moved into these dorms. How you had been lost in your own thoughts and...

Huh...

“Depends on the type of tea.”

“Well,” You put the pot on to boil, turning with a smile as you slid over to the tea cabinet. “I’m in the mood for a relaxing green tea. So...honey or lemon.”

Were you trying to help him? His eyes followed you as you flipped open the box lid, pulling out two tea bags. Why the fuck did you think he needed any help? You - of all people - should know he could absolutely handle himself. He could figure out his own shit. If anything, he should the one that’s strong for you.

Still...some tea sounded nice.

“...both.”

You paused for a moment and even though he couldn’t see your face, he knew could just tell that you were smiling. You don’t miss another beat, instead giving a soft nod as you made for the fridge. “Both it is.”

You shut the stove off before the whistle, just to ensure you didn’t wake anyone else up. Neither of you spoke as you worked and if you noticed him watching you, you didn’t say anything. He had a thousand different thoughts and things floating around in his head but nothing made sense. Words that seemed out of place, emotions that didn’t have a home. And the most pressing of it wasn’t even about you - which would be a reprieve it it wasn’t replaced with the overwhelming guilt that still found it’s way buried in his gut. He almost wanted to be panicking over you, if only for a moment of semi peace.

Just when everything was starting to look up.

“I know you don’t like to talk about this kind of stuff...” The sound of your voice startles him, causing him to come up from drowning for just a moment. “But,” You continue with a smile. “I’d like to listen.”

You’d like to listen? The fuck kind of thing to say? Why would he tell you anything? What good would it do him? Bakugou had been fighting on his own for so long - pushing himself, pulling himself up, throwing himself in the face of danger. The attack on the U.S.J, the sport festival, the attack on the camp. It was always him - just him. No one else. He could figure this shit out on his own and he didn’t need you to help him with it.

“I don’t need any of your fucking pity,” He snarled sipping on the drink. He winced at the bitterness of the lemon. What did you do? Squeeze the entire thing in? Fuck, you couldn’t even make a decent cup of tea, how could you expect to help him with anything.

“Should I be pitying you?” You asked.

“...” He blinked and looked up at you. Did you... “No, what did I just-”

“So then you’re alright?”

...what on earth? What the hell kind of questioning was this? “Yes.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes, of course I’m fucking sure!! Why would I say I was when I fucking wasn’t and even so-”

“Then why does it look like you’ve been crying?”

A large block of eyes slammed down into his stomach and sent it down towards his feet. He had been sure his eyes were dry, the puffing around his cheeks and the redness of his nose and cheeks had gone down. There shouldn’t be any evidence left over about what happened in the testing grounds. Those bright red eyes searched your face, trying to piece together how exactly you knew that he had broken down. All he could come up with was the shame growing ever steady. He adverted his gaze. “It’s none of your business.” No need to deny it. You already knew.

He couldn’t tell you. He couldn’t let you in on the secret between Deku and All Might. He made a promise and he couldn’t break that promise...

Not even you.

But you got the hint. Instead, you reached out. Slow at first...stopping only once before resting your hand down on his. “Bakugou...” You softly called out his name, to get his attention. “You don’t have to tell me everything...or anything...but you’re not alone in this.” You gave him a soft smile. It was...amazingly warm. It caused the air in his lungs to catch and his heart to jump. “Okay?”

“...” Of course he wasn’t alone in this. He had his classmates, his mom and dad...you. This was just class mates looking out for each other, just friends being friends, right? He swallowed the hope, nodding slowly. “Yeah.”

But that didn’t seem to suffice. “No, Bakugou. You’re not alone, okay? It’s okay.”

What had he said wrong? What did he say that didn’t sound right? What did he fuck up now? “Yeah. I got it.” He pushed back against you, eyes narrowing.

“No.” You stood up, refusing to break your gaze or your hold on his hand. “Bakugou, listen to me. You are not alone.”

How could you even say that? How could you assume that you could shove yourself into his life and make everything better? What gave you that fucking right!? And why the hell was he allowing it! He had to be the strongest, the best, the greatest there ever was - and he had to do it on his own. If he relied on anyone else, they could realize. They could figure it out. They would see it for what it was. “Don’t.” His teeth clenched, and those red eyes met yours. The redness was getting worse now, a gloss of tears causing them to flash under the glow of the florescent lights. “Don’t say that to me. You don’t know.”

“You’re not alone.” You said again, lower now. It made it worse. He didn’t deserve the soft tone, he deserved to be spoken to like he speaks to others. He deserved the rage and he deserved someone to yell and scream and hate him as much as he did.

“Fuck you!!” He reacted in the only way he knew how. If he lashed out, then you would have no choice but to leave. You would have no choice but to hate him. He was trying to stop everything that was going wrong. He was trying to stop it, stop everything to just make you understand. He slammed his hands against your shoulders, pushing you back and away from him. You stumbled, only a little, catching yourself against the table. His glare hardened on you, trying to find a way to get it through your thick head. Why wouldn’t you understand??? “Fuck you, alright!? You don’t know! It’s all my fucking fault!! Nothing can change that!! Nothing you can say will ever make it better!!”

Bakugou’s voice became thick with tears. His heart was hammering against his chest, making it harder and harder to breath with each passing second. His eyes shut tightly, trying to get everything under control. He didn’t want to break in front of anyone, least of all you. You didn’t deserve any of this and yet you were the only one he could... you were the only one he wanted to... His entire body was shaking when you made your next move. Whether it was your soft chanting that did it, or the equally soft touch of your fingers against his cheek, he wasn’t sure what exactly triggered the down fall. But there you were. Your hand found his shoulder, bending to try and get him to look at you. “It’s not your fault, Bakugou. Okay? It’s not your fault.”

“...but...” He tried, weak now. He was tired. So tired.

“It’s not your fault.”

He didn’t want to fight anymore. He couldn’t fight anymore.

“It’s not your fault.”

He was so thankful for your gentle touch. So thankful for how soft you were speaking.

“It’s not your fault.”

Bakugou covered his face with his hands, burying it in the darkness...and let out a terrible sob. The past few months - no, the past few years, came barreling out. He let out another sob, then another, and then he lost count. “I’m sorry!!” He tried. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

He could smell your perfume through his only defense, could feel the warmth of your arms as they wrapped around him and bought him close. You were holding him and before he knew it, he was gripping onto you for dear fucking life. He buried his face between your neck and your shoulder. He could feel his tears falling from his face and staining your sweatshirt, making it more damp than it was when you first walked into the kitchen. His fingers gripped the fabric, pulling you tight up against him. And you didn’t push him away. If only the kids at Aldera could see him now. The great and powerful Bakugou, sobbing against the girl he liked because he couldn’t handle it anymore.

...God, Bakugou was so thankful for you.

You held him for an hour, letting him cry for however long he needed. It didn’t make everything better...

But in the moment, it was enough.

So I totally plan on there being a part 3 to this. Mostly because I want to explore them exploring their relationship and also Shinsou’s feelings for the reader.

Again, I’m sorry this took so long. I wanted it to be the perfect blend of perfect and messed up because I wanted to show that Bakugou is going through some shit. And I hate that the Manga or the anime isn’t talking about it besides one mention by All Might. let me see what my boy is feeling.

Anyway, I’m not sure when I’ll get started on Part 3 because like....that’s a lot and I have some spooky scary shit to get through first. But let me know what everyone thinks and I hope you enjoy!!

-- Mod Skelly

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sumergosuigeneris · 5 years

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January 5, 2019, Part II

I do not think Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is special. I haven’t paid *that* much attention to her, but from what I’ve seen - she reminds me of myself and sooooooo many of the people I associate with in life. As in, she is what *I* consider a *normal* person. As in, if they think she’s weird in congress, it’s because they are out of touch with soooooo many Americans.

Today was interesting. Apparently, because a few of us wanted starbucks (I instigated) we were late to the start of our shooting session. It could be argued that if we had gotten up earlier, we’d have been okay, but whatever. I take responsibility.

My first few rounds were absolutely terrible and ridiculous. My one arrow that I was complaining about last week? I couldn’t shoot it after the first round. Got an extra arrow from a teammate - he gave me his worst, which ended up being about as bad as the one it replaced lol.

I was so embarrassed by how I was shooting. But I was shooting with older guys. Guys who’ve been shooting for decades. And they were patient and stuff, especially when I explained that I didn’t know anything about how the tournament would work. But, if you’ve never been to an archery tournament, the space is squished. Basically, everyone gets 1 foot. So also, the targets are right next to each other. And I? I kept shooting into my neighbor’s target. He was good about it. Until the moment when my arrow in his target fucked up his shot. He was ticked, and I was HORRIFIED. Devastated. I got really upset and started crying a bit. To the extent that I cry, of course. It was mostly tears dripping. But I think if I hadn’t maintained some control, I would have cried for real. The idea that my terrible shots would screw up someone else’s score/performance. Luckily, the judge decided he could do a redo. Then he was less upset, and so was I.

The guys I was shooting with told me the problem was arrows. I told them I thought it was me, but they said there was no way I could shoot well when most of my arrows didn’t match, and the fletching was terrible on most of them. So I concentrated on fixing my form, and doing the best I could. It helped a lot. But, really only my two matching size arrows, that both happened to have 3 vanes, were consistent. I was still embarrassed, but.

Anyway, my shooting was so bad for the first few ends, and then after that debacle, that a judge had to stand near me for most of the rest of our match, in case it happened again. And my focus was primarily on not hitting that guy’s target.

But everyone was really going over my arrows and were upset that I was there with terrible equipment. And the one judge really felt for me. He was mad at our coach and/or president. He told me they never should have let me come with terrible equipment. That it was also a safety issue.

Coincidentally, the last end.....my most terrible arrow, after going crazy, hit a piece of metal and bounced back, almost hitting another archer. I almost hurt someone.

When I told the president, he acted like it was my fault for picking bad arrows. I explained that’s all there was. He asked why I didn’t pick medium arrows. I said a) I was told it didn’t matter if my arrow lengths matched, but also b) I didn’t know it didn’t make a difference if I used a medium over a short arrow. He acted like the other archery club I go to should have taught me all that stuff. And that they were supposed to go over tournament stuff with me.

Literally, of the 8 of us from the team, 7 of us are here for the first time. I double-checked and NO ONE got any more information than I got.

He wanted to blame me, and to blame my club that I go to from time to time for not doing what was our team’s responsibility.

I have to say, I’m proud of how I handled myself. After learning that the guy could redo his shot later, I picked myself up emotionally, and tried to have a sense of humor about it. And I was able to refocus and improve my performance. And I never got angry. I think that’s a win for me.

So the judge, he told me he had bought a bunch of arrows and he was going to give me a few. Me, not the team, he emphasized. I had to go back after our lunch, when everyone else went on a fun tour of some of Iowa. It took forever. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to do any shooting with him, as it was getting late for the last round to finish. Luckily, he was tired and just told me where he left me TEN arrows! Wow! I thought maybe he’d give me five.

Pres looked at them later, and said they were probably around $160 in arrows. I was so touched. Judge’s name was Ron.

Also, the guys I shot with? Larry and David lol. And the guy who’s target I fucked up? I believe his name was Don.

Really nice guys.

I also saw someone who made the 2020 olympic team!

Here’s hoping I shoot better tomorrow, because I won’t have bad arrows as an excuse.

I met the team after at a bowling place. Then we went to dinner. Apparently, I wasn’t supposed to drink. Btw, yes, I ditched Dry January, but I needed it. We went to a burger joint that is popular. The burger was eh, but the milkshake was yeah!

The prez, as I’ve mentioned before, gets on my nerves. He micromanages, and/or tries to dominate at least me. And he’s passive aggressive. And he feels like he needs to know more than everyone else about everything. He will seek until he finds a topic he knows more about. When he’s not doing those things, I like him. But when he goes to far or too long with me, I do get frustrated. Tonight, I acted like I didn’t know he was old enough to drink. That was my way of passive aggressively letting him know I think he’s an immature child lol. But also, I feel like we have a few things in common, if you know what I mean, which may be why he grates on me.

Proud of how I handled the day in general. Tomorrow will be an early day of shooting, a looong as drive home, and exhaustion!

#me

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surrealcatharsis · 2 years

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Hi. im forewarning you that I am processing anger, insecurity, and hurt feelings. I am still getting clear about what I desire and what I want. I am accessing high frequency thoughts (highest frequency of love) so these thoughts will be transformed, however I do love to use writing as a tool to process my thoughts and because I wanted to type fast, it’s coming on tumblr. This prelude was written at the end, so if you’re continuing reading, the following is where I started. And, You’ve been warned. Thank You. IM UPSET. why?! BECAUSE I DONT UNDERSTAND THE LESSON. dear GOD TEACH ME THE LESSON. carson unfollowed me on Instagram. Part of me thinks its because he still has feelings for me and a part of myself feels hopeful and glad about it; I felt glad that I move him so strongly that he would have to unfollow me. on the other hand, I’m upset because I feel like we should have some sort of basis in our lives of knowing each other. I FEEL he constantly wants to throw me in the trash and if it was anyone else, I want to say that I would let them! Who cares!!! But for him, I care so deeply or perhaps unhealthily. I want him in my life, and the way he doesn’t want me in his life just STINGS THE FUCK OUT OF ME. I try to think of all these ways to hold on in a healthy way, to let myself be at ease with his distance. I know he’s in a relationship but I just want to scream in his face: HELLO IM STILL HERE AND I STILL THINK ABOUT YOU. DO YOU THINK ITS A COINCIDENCE? DO YOU THINK THIS HAPPENS ALL THE TIME? Do you think our connection is special at all? Something worth wild to put our pride aside and stand by CONNECTION AND LOVE.? Do you ? Do you not?

sometimes I think he is the LOVE OF MY LIFE, and yet is this how I imagine the lover of my life treating me? No. Never. I need a new beginning, but I am attached to his form. I know it’s attachment. There’s not much connection between us, on a conscious level. I’m attached to his form but I’m unclear how to dissolve the attachment. attached to his *form.* isn’t that strange? I’m attached to his *form, but it feels deeper than that at the same time. I feel committed to him; maybe I am attached to my commitment, but commitment means so much to me. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: IM COMMITTED TO HIM. IM NOT COMMITTED TO MANY THINGS.

IM CONFUSED. AM I TRYING TO DETACH OR AM I TRYING TO RELEASE MY COMMITMENT?

my sovereign mind tells me to be strong and not play with those silly ideas: LET IT GO BABY. YOU ARE DIVINE. YOU ARE IN A FLOW. YOUR ENVIRONMENT IS POPPING OFF RIGHT NOW. But my body is just sooooooo unwilling to let my lover go. I do not want it. I guard it like a creature. I feel like a baby. A baby. I Do. Not. want My. love R to. leave. Me. Do not. Leave. Lover. How dare you give up something so rare and special and precious and dear to my god damn heart ? My heart ? . ! my Love!.? My heart, my love, my stronger sense of self, fragmenting by the shattering the pieces I’m upset over losing you how dare you leave me so coldly? Could you imagine? Calling someone over to your house and leaving them in the winter cold? I forgive him!!!! IS THE LESSON FORGIVENESS? GOD I WANT TO BE RELINQUISHED OF THIS NEED AND THIS WANTING AND THIS ATTACHMENT. LEEEEEEEET YOUR HANDS OFF ME NOW GO GONE GOODBYE CDISOOSIDNDD DSNNSHOOOOOOOOOWP GONE! GO GOODBYE GONE ILL SEE YOU LATER.

why do I want to rally against the sky tonight? How can I make this into WISDOM? IM ANGRY AT HIM!!! I WANT TO SCREAM INTO HIS FACE. WHY DOES HE NOT LOVE ME? WHY DO I NOT LOVE NTSELF? WHY DO I SEE SO MUCH WORTH ANDREFLECTION IN HIM? I NEED TO DIVE DEEPER. I want to be in the knowing and sovereignty and grace and gentleness to let my attachment and my strings to him go while still holding the highest purity and connection of love to him. I love you Carson. please dear god let me love from the highest places. Let me be wise. let me be compassionate and forgiving and gentle and graceful. Let me let go gracefully. find my own prayer. find my own sovereignty. find my own peace within.

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henry-hart · 6 years

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The Danger Begins s1 ep1

I’m so glad I decided to rewatch this because it made me so happy!!!! (also, to keep you guys from getting uber annoyed with me, i’m just gonna lb on one big post like this from now on lolol)

first off

s1 henry was the cutest thing to ever exist. ever. my heart couldn’t take it bc he’s so grown now but in that first ep he’s this adorable little baby chick ajdksjslk

it was so incredible to see Siren on my screen. Like, within thirty seconds BAM there she was. i felt blessed, like she blessed my laptop

PIPER. MY OVERDRAMATIC DAUGHTER. I miss her “I am NOT okay!!!” catchphrase akdjlsj

her “so we’re living like animals now” reply to being told to wait for her video to load---same girl, same.

Henry at 13 was a million times more proactive about the whole job search than I have ever been and I’m 22 sksjskjsk

his whole “I’m not good at anything. I’m a big ball of average”---I feel that lol

“No special skills needed.” “That’s me!!”

okay one of Char’s first lines was “One day when you two are cleaning my pool bc you failed this algebra test...” and it doesn’t get more iconic than that

GOOCH. I HAVE MISSED YOU.

Ray just coming in with all these ridiculous questions lolol poor Hen

“I’m 13. I’ll be 14....on my next bday.” ajskjsksljk

“Ah, so you’re aging sequentially. I like that. The name’s Ray.” “Nice to meet you, Ray. I’m Henry.” “You ask a lot of questions.” “I....don’t think....I’ve asked any questions...????” loved it

I laughed when Ray changed into his uniform and the zipper got stuck (that never happens again????)

“Did you have to melt my phone???” Hen, sweetie, hate to break it to you, but your phone gets broken.....preeeeetty much every ep (need me a bank account like that where I can steady get new iphones)

WhAt Do YoU mEaN nO sPeCiAl SkIlLs HeNrY???? yOu NoTiCeD tHe TaToO!!!!!! u smart lil cookie

Ray was all “I’m getting old. I can’t do this forever.” Two things: 1) RAY DID YOU JUST REFER TO YOURSELF AND OLD IN THE SAME SENTENCE??? 2) why is this never mentioned again??? Like, Ray got a sidekick to pass the mantle onto someone younger to keep protecting Swellview when he’s done. We’re like 4 yrs down the line, and they haven’t even hinted towards CM retiring??? (I know that would mean the end of the show, but they could at least bring it up every now and then)

OK. hated the toddler then. hate him now.

Props to the props department (ha ha get it???) for all the junk in the store. It’s all so strange and doesn’t make sense and fits the show so well (also it seems like each ep has diff junk??? that’s impressive)

“They seem like nice kids.” “Yeah, they’re names are Jasper x Charlotte. I’ve known them ever since--” “Get rid of them.” “I’ll get rid of them.”

DAWWWW Jasper x his buckets :’))))

“I told you Canadian money upsets ppl!!!” Ah Char (I wonder if Riele comes up with some of these Canada jokes??)

OMG I FORGOT ABOUT HEN’S HORRIBLE TEST WARDROBE. IMAGINE IF THEY HAD KEPT ONE OF THOSE IDEAS AKSJLKSJ (there really wasn’t any need for a whole test wardrobe tho--just style an outfit to fits Ray’s. His obvs works out well for him) (I know that’s what they ended up doing lolol)

Okay, Ray’s “Oh man. I ate a lot of fruit.” line KILLS. ME. bc when i first watched this ep, every time the scene changed and Ray was shown w/ a diff fruit, I was like, “Why...is he eating so much fruit????” bc they’re all diff and he even eats a whole pineapple--outside peel and all. BUT I WAS THINKING IT AND THEN HE SAID IT AND IT MADE IT ONE MILLION TIMES FUNNIER.

LIL BB HEN IN HIS SUIT FOR THE FIRST TIME. I CRY. HE’S SO TINY AND HAPPY

“Chew gum. Blow bubble. Fight crime.” Ray wrote those instructions. I just know it. aksjskl

“And what does a single flashing light mean?” “Just to shoot me a text, you know, whenever.” aksjklsk

HENRY JUST GAVE HIS PLEDGE. THEN. HE. SAID. THE. ICONIC. “FEELS GOOD” FOR. THE. FIRST. TIME. I’M CRYING.

Hen not knowing how to get the tubes to work and just jumping up and down making noises aksjlsk

“Affirmative.” “That means ‘yes’.” “I got that.” and so the sass begins lolol love it

“Awwww no! That was my favorite bridge!”

“I hate my life and I am NOT okay.” i feel u Pipes

the sass is strong in those Hart kids. Siren x Jake can’t catch a break aksjslk

Siren. Hart. Is. So. Beautiful. her hair just looks so good this ep

“I’ll run away. I’ll do it.” ajskjskl Pipes chill

Jake....Siren...that’s....your son on the tv screen...like.....that’s literally your child’s face.....the product of both of your genes is right there.....plastered on the screen.....how do u....not....recognize him?????

“Two ppl said they might come.” “Who?” “Sidney Birnbaum and Oliver Pook.” “Ew.” “Those guys eat bugs.” “So? They’re people.” I just love the kid’s line delivery here lolol

I just want everyone to know that s1 Henry is the cutest. I already said it, but I’m saying it again.

Henry panicking bc he doesn’t want C x J to keep reading about KD but he also doesn’t know what to do so he just throws a glass and smacks C’s phone out of her hand and clean across the room ajskjslk SAME

Jace was so.....twitchy in the first two seasons. He’s really mellowed---which I understand it happens when you get older---but it’s just so funny to see this little bean with all his crazy expressions and loud outbursts and rapid movements lolol

Hey Lelani? You’re hot (give me ukelele lessons pls)

“The toddler’s men stole 5,000 packages of diapers. Can you guess why?” “Uhhhh???” “To bombard the diapers with radioactive zenite particles.” “.....I would not have guessed that.”

also Ray getting lower to the ground as he talks and Hen just following is so funny to me. Ray was really extra in that first ep

RAYMOND MANCHESTER HOW DARE YOU GET MAD AT HEN FOR WANTING TO GO TO HIS BFF’S BDAY PARTY INSTEAD OF FIGHTING CRIME. HE IS 13. AND YOU WOULD LATER CALL HIM UP WITH THE EMERGENCY ALARM PAST 12 AT NIGHT FOR CORNDOGS, SO I DON’T WANT TO HEAR IT.

“Okay. Okay. It’s cool. You go to Jasper’s party. I’ll handle the toddler by myself. Don’t worry about it.” “Are you sure?” “Yeah. I’ve battled the toddler alone before--almost killed me, but whatever.” and u still want to take a 13 yr old out there??? Ray.

“No, I’m not bringing the muffins!” but u said u would

okay, but the news jumping from CM’s kidnapping to a report on why squirrels love nuts???? TOO tru (they really do that “here’s something serious. kids are dying. now here’s this pointless and meaningless crap” lolol)

“I can’t talk! I’m naked!” friends anyone??? (“You can’t come in. Ross is naked.” “Why’d you tell her I was naked???” “I couldn’t tell her I was naked. She’s allowed to see me naked.” “Why does anyone have to be naked???”) (sorry i just love friends akjslkjs)

I FORGOT WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE SIDNEY X OLIVER ON MY SCREEN. I LOVE THEM.

I hate u toddler. just in case you were doubting.

Jasper unknowingly saving the day by downloading that sound effect app on Hen’s phone *claps for him*

Henry just....completely kicking butt on his second day???? That’s my son.

“Captain Man!” “Henry!” “It’s Kid Danger.” :))))) I’M SQUEALING. I’M SO PROUD OF HIM. HIS LIL POINT TO RAY AND THAT SMALL SMILE. TOO. CUTE. (also Ray just namedropping like they don’t have identities to protect)

“How do I get you out of there?” “I don’t know. This is the first time I’ve been stuck in a baby bouncer hovering over a bottomless ball pit.” CALL SUPERHEROES OUT, RAY. all these extravagant traps they’re caught in and they just....know what to do??? Doubtful. (bottomless pits are impossible, but you know lol)

Ray swinging around everywhere in that baby bouncer was hilarious alkjdlksj

that spitting device is the literal WORST thing i have ever seen. i freaking hate spit.

God, i wish the toddler had stayed tf down there in that ball pit. i wish that bottle had blown him to the center of the earth. (sorry i just really don’t like him akdjslj)

“What do we do with this? (the bottle bomb)” “We give the baby his bottle.” “Ah. Good call.” “Hey.” “Suuuuup.” “Hurry.” “Oh, right.” aksjlsksjl there are some really good moments in this ep

Ray shielding Henry was <33333 (it would be really messed up if he hadn’t considering he’s indestructible, but I like to think that he chose to)

AJKSJSKLSKSJLK HENRY’S FACE WHEN RAY TOLD HIM “GOOD JOB” WAS SOOOOOOO PRECIOUS. He looked so shocked. Like, “CM thinks I did a good job????”

It’s like, Henry’s second day on the job, and they’re just namedropping right and left. Why be careful???? It’s not like they have secret identities or anything.....(they steady use their real names. i guess they don’t really have to worry. C must be the only smart person in Swellview bc no one else seems capable of figuring it out. I mean, not even his parents recognized him ajksjslk)

If you need any proof that Ray is a good guy, just watch this ep. His willingness to show up to J’s party despite only knowing Hen for like two days is a solid testament to his character. This is the Ray I know and love.

awwwwww poor Jasp. your party isn’t a flop. It’s about to be lit af because your bff is HENRY FREAKING HART, THE SWEETEST BOY TO EVER LIVE.

Ray, your excuse is horrible. “My van broke down across the street so I decided to come into this house and into this basement.” alskjlskj what is that????

“You’re CM!” “Thank you.” “You’re my hero!” “Of course.” oh Ray

Henry’s just watching J freak out over CM, watching how excited and happy J is and knowing he did that for him, and it’s just----my heart is all ajkdjlsjks

Char is the cutest in this ep. she’s fangirling over CM, and it’s so weird bc now she can’t stand him lolol

Hen x Ray pretending they don’t know each other. SO. PRECIOUS. Ray’s face is so sweet and they share this secret smile and just GAHHHH

J asking CM if he can hit him w/ a bball bat alksjlk “Remember kids: never do this to anyone but CM bc regular ppl could be badly inju--AHHHHHH.......I wasn’t done talking.” “Did that hurt?” “Yeah. But I’m okay.” the way Ray says yeah cracks me up bc it’s like, duh it hurt. it was a bat hitting my head lolol

“Hey, CM?” “Yes, boy?” “Would it be ok if Jasp texted a few friends and told them you were here at his party?” “Suuurrreeee. I love being used.” Ray kills me. cooper x jace have some of the best line delivery/comedic timing akdjslkj

*J is shaking CM’s hand* “Thank you so much! This is the best day of my life!” “Ha ha, are your hands always this sweaty?” “Yes sir.” “He takes medicine for it.” “Wellllll, it’s not working.” *wipes hand on J and leaves wet mark* ajsklj poor Jasper

Henry brought the muffins after all <33333 “Muffins.” “Yeah.” (you can tell Jace x Sean were already good friends. so cute.)

Hen x Char got Jasp the bucket from the shop that Gooch wouldn’t let him have. Dawwwwww

“For awhile there, I thought you weren’t gonna come.” “Come on, man. I’ll always be there for you.” then. they. hug. they’re. so. cute. i. love. solid. friendships.

HENRY’S LAST LITTLE LOOK AT THE PARTY BEFORE HE LEAVES IS THE BEST THING EVER. THE LITTLE NOD HE MAKES LIKE, “YEAH. THIS IS GOOD.” LIKE, HE’S PERFECTLY OK WITH MISSING OUT SO LONG AS EVERYONE ELSE IS HAVING FUN. AHHHHHH. I LOVE HIM SO MUCH. :)))))) <3333333

that was a perfect way to end an ep

I’m glad I watched this. I’ve forgotten most of the earlier episodes which is a crime because they’re so good. It was hard to see Jace so little when he’s so grown now!!!!! My heart couldn’t take it. But lil Henry is precious and I love him. Stay tuned for more rewatches!!!! xoxoxox

#sorry if this was long or incoherent #it was a wild ride #i had to stop watching halfway thru bc of some stupid crap going on #but i finished and here we are #this was fun #watching hd makes me happy #i'm gonna do this for every ep #maybe #aksljlks #hd rewatch #the danger begins #episode synopsis

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canaryatlaw · 6 years

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okay. another long and mostly good day. The vast majority of it was good but I got slightly peeved at my family and of course particularly at my asshole (older) brother, but whatever. Jess’ alarm went off at 8, and we started getting dressed. I was doing my Ramona Flowers cosplay today, and I was pretty sure I was going to melt because the outfit was legit a hoodie and then another jacket over that, but I did my best to find ones that were described as lightweight. I was doing normal make up today so I ddi that and then we headed out. My house perpetually never has breakfast food, so we stopped at McDonalds for food and coffee, and then we were on our way. The ride there and back went pretty smoothly both days, nothing really crazy that would be an issue. We got there right around 10 when it opened, and there was quite a line to get past security and inside, so we had to wait outside and I was doing my best not to totally overheat lol. I set the metal detector off at the juvenile courthouse so many times that now whenever I walk through one and don’t set it off, it feels like an accomplishment honestly 😂 but we got in, Brandon wasn’t out yet so we browsed for a while mostly looking at funko pops, Jess wanted the ATOM of course and I was casually looking for Ramona since I know they have one and that would be cool to have. I’m also going to buy the Elektra from Daredevil pop at some point, just haven’t gotten around to it yet (and my stack of dark haired women that can kick your ass funko pops is getting quite tall lately). We also went back to the t-shirt place from yesterday and browsed for a bit, I resisted the temptation to buy more wonder woman shirts, partially because they were just in unisex sizes that I don’t like how they fit me. But I did get the “Nelson and Murdock: attorneys at law” shirt I wanted so that made me happy. It reminds me of my first year legal writing class which is all graded anonymously through your student ID number so our prof said we could make up a name to actually sign it with, and I ended up putting “Sara Lance, Assassins at Law” as opposed to attorneys at law and I felt very clever lol. I’m pretty sure I put the address as like 123 Comingforyou drive too. Good times. So then we made our way back to Brandon’s table as he had arrived, so we were good and waited in line, then talked to him of course, he noticed and complimented my cosplay immediately, a lot of people actually told me they liked it which I was pleased to hear because she has a lot of different outfits in the movie and it’s not like you’re gonna memorize every one, but I’m sure the wig with the rather distinctive larger pieces in the front helped. So we chatted with him and took some selfies, which thankfully look better than the ones from yesterday that were god awful. I told him I wanted to do a fighting photo op pose, so we were prepared for that. The photo op wasn’t till 1:30 though and we didn't have much else to be, and Brandon was kinda swamped so we couldn’t really just chill with him. So we walked around a bit more then ended up sitting in front of their main panel stage, and happened to watch the kids costume contest, which was sooooooo adorable, so many precious children. the one who takes the kid though was definitely this little boy who dressed as a transformer, with like, incredible detail and care, but the kicker is when he lays down HE CAN ACTUALLY TRANSFORM INTO A TRUCK and if that’s not the coolest idea ever I don’t know what is. So, unsurprisingly, he won, got some sort of star wars land speeder things, idk. That started at 12 and we wanted to be at the photo op at like 1 because they tended to start early. Brandon wasn’t at his table, so we talked to his handlers for a bit, who are both super nice and like, actual friends with Jess now lol, so we did that before going to the photo op, and unsurprisingly they started like 20 minutes before the scheduled time. We were sent to wait behind the photo set up and I’m standing there waiting and this guy in a fucking spider-man costume just like, walks past me and places himself on line and I really, really wanted to be like “hey asswipe, do you actually know how not to be a fucking moron??” but the small amount of common sense I do have decided that it wasn’t worth it so I just glared at him periodically. When I got into the photo op we kind of figured out our pose and then took the photo, and it came out super good, I’ll grab it and post it on here in a minute (well, when I’m done here). Once we had the photo we went back over to the table and shamelessly cut the line (wow I’m a hypocrite but like we have street cred here we can do that) to show Brandon the photo op, and he of course signed it without me even asking, and wrote a very funny message about the two characters, so that made me happy. Having done the rounds a lot and not really having much else to do we decided to say goodbye and head out, Brandon was leaving at 3 anyway so he could get back to Courtney and their son for Father’s Day (awwwwww). Saying goodbye is always hard and like, it’s hard to say when we might see him again since not a whole lot of stuff has been announced so far. I definitely did miss Courtney being there too. But anyway, we headed out and decided we needed some lunch, so I decided Jess needed to try authentic New York pizza (on the hierarchy of NY foods non-Yankees need to try while here is like 1) bagels 2) pizza 3) either carvel or friendly’s, 4) kosher delis 5) diners, and 6) normal delis). so I just googled mapped the nearest pizzeria and went there, because I know we can get fab pizza at any place there, and it was very fab! I love getting pizza whenever I’m here, so it was really a must. Jess very much enjoyed hers, even if she continues to talk about how Chicago deep dish is better, but I’m quite aware that’s more to antagonize me than an actual opinion at this point 😂 when we were walking out she was yelling like “DEEP DISH IS BETTER!!!” and I was like “careful, you can get shot for saying stuff like that here” and this random guy who was walking away from his car was like “I’ll get the gun” and we both basically died laughing. Drive home was fine, hit a bit of traffic but nothing bad. When we were right about to pass a Carvel I had the bright idea to ask if Jess wanted ice cream (because I always want ice cream, of course) and she said heck yeah so we pulled into the place. I got my favorite vanilla soft serve with chocolate crunches on the outside and in a waffle cone, Jess ended up order a combination of their three different types of sherbet that they made especially for her 😂 it was also funny because we were chatting a little with this lady standing next to us, whom we discovered was also from Chicago and was here visiting, lol. so that was good. Carvel doesn’t have a seating area or anything, so we just went back to the car to eat them, and damn, they tasted so good, but it took sooo long to finish them (and that was the “small” version), When we did finish I drove the rest of the way home, things were a bit busy with everyone prepping for father’s day dinner, one of our family friends was over and in charge of the steaks, so there was all that. We basically just chilled in my room until we got called for dinner, which was being held outside at the table on the patio, which is always nice. Dinner was pretty good, things were pretty solid, We broke before dessert and then rejoined a bit later, and while dessert was very lovely my asshole older brother started making asshole comments and like....objectively it was nothing, I know it was nothing, but it just makes me so damn mad when he says does things like laughing at me and then saying “oh please, Rachel would be a terrible lawyer for (specific area of law” and I really just wanted to get up and punch him and like.....I hate this so much because I so want to be at a point where stupid little things like that don’t get under my skin, but honestly the stupidest little jerk comments just trigger all these emotions in me because this, and much, much worse, happened for so many years, and when he does it now it’s like I’m right back there, living a life I desperately wanted to get out of any way possible- any way at all. Of course it only got worse from there, because we were talking about job shit and my parents were pulling more of this “well you’re just going to come to New York even though you’ve told us like 12 times on this trip that you want to stay in Illinois” and just like the fact that they really don’t seem to give a damn about how I feel about major decisions in my life and that’s really infuriating. And then of course the friend of my father’s came up in conversation and it was the guy who posted the creepy comment about “smiling” on my facebook photo and I said so, and then of course nobody took me serious at all, they’re all laughing and making fun of me for even being creeped out about this and it was surely not what he intended, and I mean, of course I held back that like 10 years ago when I was 16 he messaged me late at night a few times and asked me creepy invasive questions, so one damn comment of “smile” (which is bad enough tbh) meant a whole lot more than that. So I was kinda pissed over them still refusing to take anything I feel into account, they just laugh every time I get upset and mad and I really just want to fucking punch them and be told my feelings are valid for once in my fucking life, for fucking ONCE for one of them to be sorry for something they did to me, fucking tortured me, and the word “sorry” never came to their lips about it, and they think they never did anything wrong, and if I tried to bring it up I would only be mocked and shit on more, and I’m just like I’m done with this. However, within and in between all of this happening, my dad decided the best way to get me to stay in New York would be for them to basically adopt Jess (and I mean, he ain’t wrong) and move us both out here, like he's legit getting in contact with people who might know of teaching jobs because my dad is fucking wild okay. And there is currently at least one semi-viable lawyer position open on LI right now so I mean I’ll see what happens there. My parents seem to be of the opinion that I should stay in NY even if I don't have a job lined up because I’ll get one eventually but like, that’s the exact same situation as Chicago, except I have way more contacts there and dad’s contacts have been totally unsuccessful up to this point, Sigh. This is long, Guess I had a lot to say. After dessert we pretty much retreated to my room and spent the rest of the night in here, with my dad coming in two times setting up information about jobs for both of us, and like, I told Jess before we got here my parents were probably pay her rent if I asked them too, and they definitely proved that this weekend. We didn’t really do anything else before getting ready for bed, so that’s about it. I am super super tired and we fly out early tomorrow morning (not like 6 am thankfully, but 8:30 flight still means I have to get up at six, so I am officially ending this post here so I can actually shut my eyes before the do some involuntarily. Goodnight babes. Stay gorgeous,

#daily journal #June 2018 #Rachel's cosplay adventures

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asexualmew · 7 years

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Learning Disabled and How The American Public School System Failed Me

Arc I - Special Ed

Okay, so I’m learning disabled. The earliest age they can actually test for that sort of thing, with the exception of speech tests which was done much earlier, was in 2nd grade, but it was apparent before then, too. I was put into multiple Special Ed type classes.

Alphaphonics

Some English class? Different from Alphaphonics?

A Math class

Speech therapy

Apart from speech therapy that I had started when I was 2 years old and continued to sometime at the end of 4th grade when I finally graduated, these classes felt...

Pointless.

I mean, there was definitely a need for special education, but the way my elementary school went about it, it felt absolutely useless. I can’t even remember doing any work in my English class. I remember once the teacher read to us a book, and another time the teachers wanted to see if glasses with tinted colours could help me read better, but for the most part, this “English” class was just used as a free time for us kids. We’d just hang out and play lots of games.

Alphaphonics was particularly awful due to its repetition, and it wasn’t until I was an adult trying to explain to my friend how redundant and awful it was that I discovered that it really was a bullshit class, in the sense that it was a ciriculum made by an ableist man that went around trying to sell off this bullshit to schools and not many schools took the bait, but mine did. Every single day from 2nd grade to the end of elementary school, we spent the mornings cycling through flashcards, “U. Umbrella. OO. Book. OO. Moon.” Etc. Every day. For years.

And then the math class... That class did do something. Just. Not efficiently enough, I think.

Now, before I go on in this story, I want to stress that at this time I was a lawful-good goody-goody-tooshoos that was afraid of breaking a single rule in class. I was also nearly a straight A student, with a couple of B’s hanging out here or there. Thinking about that annoying teachers pet in elementary school? Good, that was me.

Okay well, this math class, this special ed class, it was patronizing as all get out! We were so behind the regular class and where they were in math. And it wasn’t because we weren’t doing well or learning the material, it’s because the teacher kept kiddy gloves on while teaching us, constantly, and she kept us behind. We’d be working on work sheets with subtraction of larger numbers, and all of us at my table would make a 100% on it... but meanwhile, at that very moment, the regular math class, the students were already on basic division.

And this was upsetting. Especially given just how often you have to be told by the grown ups around you that “You’re not stupid! You’re just special! You’re.. you’re GIFTED!” when you know that you’re just being told this to placate you, and you feel worlds behind all the “normal kids”. It doesn’t mean anything to be told that you’re not stupid, when you’re taught that grades represent your worth as a child, and you’re not even being taught the same things as the other kids your age. Being “gifted” means literally nothing when you know there’s no worth to those words.

So, being a typically quiet child who always raises their hand to speak in class and who always does the “right thing”, one day I just snapped.

Arc II - Hey! Teacher! Leave those kids alone!

I stood on the table and yelled at my special ed teachers in that math class. How DARE they treat us like we’re stupid! WE’RE NOT STUPID! We’re smart just like everyone else! We already learned this stuff months ago!! But you don’t let us move on to the next thing! We’re NOT STUPID! WE’RE NOT STUPID! STOP TREATING US LIKE WE’RE STUPID! I wanna learn what everyone else is learning! WE’RE NOT STUPID!

All of the other kids in class cheered and wooted, but the head teacher in that class was livid. I know she tried her best to make sure we didn’t feel stupid, with words like “gifted” and all that, but actions were louder than words, and I wasn’t very remorseful to her hard work. She asked me if I wanted to leave Special Ed. If I wanted to be dumped in normal class. She told me I’d fail. That I would want to come back. But I was determined, and my pride was hurt, and I wanted to be treated normal. So, she arranged it so that I was no longer in Special Ed for math. (Where was my mom in all this? I forget!)

It was 5th grade and I was very much so behind the regular class. I was given no bridge to prepare me for division. I mean, I eventually learned multiplication and division, and, my poor teacher tried to help me all she could but, I was already beginning to fall like a rock. I went from getting consistent A’s to consistent F’s. I was heartbroken.

This is when I first discovered my perfectionist tendencies, and, also, the first time those tendencies began to ruin my life. Because I couldn’t do it. And I gave up. I stopped doing my homework, first in math, then in everything. I tried what I could in class, but I never reached high. I just... gave up and quit. But I refused to go back to special ed. I’d prefer to fail on my own.

Arc III - Conspiracy

Finally, 7th grade. Middle school. I was gonna start a new here! I wouldn’t be bullied, I wouldn’t be a failure, I would do my best! Clean slate!

Well. The principle of this middle school approached me at some point. “I noticed in your papers that you were in special ed in elementary school, but then you got out? Would you like to be listed as learning disabled to make school here a little easier for you?”

Honestly, I didn’t know what that would mean, how it would be “easier”, but I knew is that I wanted nothing to do with that! I didn’t want that! I wanted to get far far away from being treated differently because of how my brain was wired. I had already been treated differently my entire life for it, and the way I was treated differently wasn’t very fun. I was scared. And prideful! I refused.

I had no idea that refusing this offer would start a little war in the school between the staff and my mom and me.

After that my grades started getting mysteriously lowered. Homework that I turned in was getting marked as “missing”. I was being sabotaged. The school kept calling in my mom to talk to her, to tell her how poor I’m doing, and try to get her to agree to have me set as Learning Disabled but, she actually respected my wishes to be free of that label. I tried to tell her, too, that “No! I really did do the work, Mom!” but she doubted me a lot. I don’t blame her.

And then, one day, my history teacher had messed up. He returned a test that we had done, all graded and everything, and I had made like, a B or something. But later, when I saw my progress report, the grade that was entered into the computer was significantly lower.

I had proof.

I showed it to my mom and she got pissed. She started showing up at the school every day to try and get them to fess up and to stop treating me this way. Meanwhile, the principle would hound me down in the halls between classes, or when I was trying to go home, to tell me how terrible I am at school and how I needed to sign up as learning disabled.

One day, in first period, I was thinking about my mom and the teachers, and all of a sudden I started breathing really hard and I couldn’t stop. It disrupted the class and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I was hyperventilating for the first time. My first panic attack before many, many more in the near and far future.

Arc IV - It All Comes Down To Money

My homeroom teacher asked me what I was thinking of, I said “Mom!” and he told me to stop thinking about it, and had the student sitting next to me walk to the nurse.

My homeroom teacher called my mom and told her to meet him after school. There, he confessed everything. He admitted that the principle was threatening all of their jobs over this. That they had meetings about how to deal with me and how to deal with my mom separately. How they were told to lie about my grades, and then tell me to my face that I really was a bad student so that I may believe them. All because the government pays more money to a public school that has learning disabled students. The more learning disabled students, the more money the school gets. And I guess when I got pulled out of special ed in elementary school, that’s how my teacher had done it, by removing me off of the list for learning disabled. I don’t understand honestly, but what I do understand, was that my principle was specifically targeting and hurting me out of greed.

After my teacher finished up explaining all of this, he said he wasn’t going to take part in it anymore, and that when the school year ends, he was going to move back to Russia and teach there, again. I really appreciated that he came forward with this at risk of his job, and that he couldn’t stand to watch this happen anymore.

I had several more panic attacks after this, including after being chased to by the principle whom, when she made it to the car I got in to go home, when the window was rolled down she stuck her head in just to continue telling me how poor of a student I was.

But it didn’t matter. Now that we knew what was going on, we would fix it.

And Mom pulled me out in that first semester and home schooled me for the rest of my middle school days.

Arc V - But the damage had been done

That was elementary school and middle school. I was sent back to public school for high school because my mom felt there were so many missed opportunities if I stayed home schooled, things she couldn’t teach me, and interactions I’d never have. I was doing very well being taught one-on-one and I learned years worth of material per semester. But- high school had art class... sooooooo.....

Unfortunately though, I just couldn’t do as well in a public setting, and I started slipping through the cracks again. It’s incredibly disheartening to know that you were the only one who cared about your German class, and you were also the only one who failed it, for example. It wasn’t that long after, when I started making all F’s and C’s again (there aren’t D’s in Texas) that I was approached and was given the offer again.

“If we label you as learning disabled, then you’ll need less credits to graduate with and you’ll be given more time during tests.”

And for everything I worked for to be cleared of that, for everything my mom did to protect me from this, I took the offer, and then continued to fail in school, but now properly as a learning disabled kid.

I had already forgotten how to do well in school, after all. And whenever I tried, and I failed, I’d just continue to fail cause I’d give up like the perfectionist I became after leaving special ed.

Public school just really isn’t designed for people like me, which is why people with some of my disabilities have such a high ratio of dropping out of school. We’re set up for failure from our early years. Even if I hadn’t left special ed, what do you think happened to all the kids int here that were behind that were being dropped in schools that didn’t have those classes? I don’t know. I mean, I can’t justify it. Like, even if I say “It’s my fault for leaving special ed”, I was also a kid. Like, 10 years old! It shouldn’t be my fault for wanting to be treated like a normal human being and doing everything in my power for that result.

I could also say it’s my fault for just not trying hard enough, but, I also can’t justify saying that, either! Heh. Cause my behavior was very much so learned.

Anyway, I graduated by the skin of my teeth through a computer remedial class and that’s better than what my mom had and I feel really fortunate for graduating at all.

#Ableism #Learning disabled #School #Abuse #Long post #Text heavy

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amylillian22 · 7 years

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Unwelcome Interruptions - Brett Talbot Imagine

Requested by @rochyu : What about this one: when the reader and brett are cuddlind in his bed naked (bc why not) and they're falling asleep together until scott and stiles burts into his room and take him with them bc he have to help with something and then the reader and all the girls are taken to the lake house ffor sleepovers and brett find her and he so pissed bc his baby girl is not with him and pls end it cute

Word Count: 1,545

Warnings: implying and mentions of sex

Author’s Note: Feedback is greatly appreciated :)

[My Teen Wolf Master List]

Brett and Y/N's relationship isn't easy. They both go to two different high schools and are constantly busy trying to save their town from the supernatural chaos. Yet, somehow, they make it work. It’s rare when they have time for each other, but when they do, they make every second count. They would go out on movie and bowling dates, go out to eat, or sometimes stay home to cuddle, and simply enjoy being with one another. Just like right now.

As soon as the final bell rang, Brett surprised Y/N by showing up in her school's parking lot. He was leaning against his car, with his ankles crossed, and his arms folded to his chest. It was like Jake waiting for Samantha in Sixteen Candles. He took her to get ice cream at her favorite ice cream parlor. Afterwards they went back to his place, where they were just going to watch a movie, but ended up in his bed. Now, they were wrapped in each other's arms with their half naked bodies underneath the sheets.

"God, I've missed you," Brett said as he pulled her to his bare chest. She hummed in agreement as she cuddled against him, taking in the mixed smell of his cologne and sweat. Brett ran his fingers through her silky hair and kissed her forehead. "I love you."

Y/N drew random shapes on his lower back with the tip of her fingers as she buried her face at the crook of his neck, peppering it with soft wet kisses. "I love you, too," she sighed in content.

Brett heard a set of footsteps after car doors were slammed. He leaned up on his elbows to look out his bedroom window and noticed Stiles' baby blue jeep was parked in the driveway. Brett has gotten closer to Scott and Stiles since he started dating Y/N. It came to a point where they could come and go into each other's houses without knocking or ringing the doorbell.

"Shit," Brett mumbled as the best friends walked up to the front door and opened it.

Completely unaware of the situation because Y/N isn't a werewolf with enhance hearing, she was confused. "What? What's wrong?" She asked concerned as she looked up at Brett.

Before Brett could explain or warn Y/N, Scott's voice echoed down the hallway as he caught Brett and Y/N's scent in his bedroom.

"Stiles! No! Wait!" Scott shouted, but it was too late. Stiles had already opened Brett's bedroom door, only to see Brett and Y/N in bed. Brett quickly sat up as Y/N wrapped the bed sheets tighter around her body.

"Oh," Stiles said, suddenly realizing why Scott was so quick to try and stop him from opening the bedroom door. He looked up at the ceiling as Scott turned around and gave the couple his back. Stiles scratched the back of his neck as he spoke, "Sorry to interrupt, but we need Brett."

"What's-"

Stiles interrupted Brett, already knowing what he was going to ask. "As always it's a supernatural problem and we need your help."

"Ditto," Scott said with his back still facing them.

Brett sighed as Y/N shook her head and placed her hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, baby. Go be a hero and protect this town." Y/N leaned in and kissed his cheek as Stiles rolled his eyes at her cheesy comment. Stiles and Scott left the couple and told Brett they would wait for him in the jeep.

"I'm so sorry," Brett apologized as he pecked Y/N's lips and got dressed quickly to meet the boys outside. Brett said he'd be back as soon as he could before he said goodbye, leaving her naked in his bed.

As soon as the front door closed, Y/N's phone beeped with a new text message from Lydia with a picture of Lydia, Kira, and Malia in their pajamas, making silly faces with their facemasks.

Boys are doing God knows what. So I’m having a sleepover at the lake house with the girls. We're all waiting on you.

It had been a while since the girls had a slumber party. With Brett out with Scott and Stiles, Y/N didn't know how long it would take for him to come back to her. It could take all night. Deciding she needed a girls’ night in, she quickly texted Lydia she’d be there soon.

"Sooooooo," Lydia lingered as she started her second coat of Devilish Red on her fingernails. "How are things with you and Brett?"

Malia grabbed a handful of popcorn, mumbling something no one understood. Kira giggled as she painted Malia's toenails Jet Black. "Don't talk with your mouth full, Malia."

"Things are pretty good, I guess," Y/N shrugged her shoulder as she turned the page of Seventeen.

"What do you mean?" Kira asked concerned.

"Yeah, I thought things were great between the two of you," Lydia added, giving Y/N her full attention and ignoring her wet fingernails.

"I mean it's hard to see each other all the time when we're in different schools and when we do find time something always interrupts our time together," Y/N explained with a heavy sigh.

"I said," Malia swallowed the last of the popcorn in her mouth, "things must be good since she reeks like Brett’s scent. She probably had sex with him before she got here."

Lydia and Kira looked at Y/N kind of surprised considering she just said they rarely have time to be together.

"That's exactly what I'm talking about," Y/N quickly defended herself before she continued to explain. "Brett surprised me after school. He took me to get ice cream and then we went to his house to hang out for a bit. One thing led to another and we're tangled in each other, naked, under the sheets. Before we could enjoy just being with each other, Scott and Stiles basically dragged him out of bed to deal with some supernatural thing. Don't get me wrong, I love you girls and I love hanging out with you and having sleepovers, but sometimes it kind of bums me out because I miss him."

Lydia and Kira aww-ed, as they leaned in and hugged Y/N. Malia didn't have the same reaction as they did, but she could sense how much Y/N was hurting. She wrapped her arms around the small group hug to give some sort of comfort to Y/N.

"I wish I had like an entire weekend with just him and with nothing getting in the way," Y/N mumbled as she pulled back.

"I have an idea. I have a beach house. Why don't you use it next weekend? Or any weekend that works for the both of you," Lydia offered.

"Really?" Y/N asked.

Lydia nodded as Y/N's phone vibrated on the coffee table. She grabbed it and immediately saw Brett's picture. She swiped her thumb across and answered, "Hey-"

"Where are you?!" Brett immediately interrupted before Y/N could finish her greeting. Brett's voice was frantic as he continued to ramble with more questions. "Are you okay? Are you hurt? Who are you with?"

"Geez..." Malia mumbled as she overheard Brett having a full panic attack with her werewolf hearing. "Paranoid much?" She whispered to the girls.

"I heard that Malia!" Brett snapped as Malia rolled her eyes at him.

"Baby, I'm fine," Y/N reassured him as she pulled her knees to her chest and wrapped an arm around them. "Are you okay?" She asked worriedly.

"I'm fine," he sighed, as a wave of relief washed over his body. "I just panicked because I came home and you weren't there, so I thought the worst..." he trailed before he sighed. "I'm just glad you're okay. Where are you?"

"I'm with the girls at Lydia's lake house. We're having a sleepover," Y/N explained.

"So you won't be coming back anytime soon?" He mumbled. Y/N could practically see Brett's bottom lip pouting, completely upset they weren't picking up where they left off.

"No, I'm sorry, baby," she apologized.

"Go," Malia said. She could sense how badly Y/N was missing Brett and she wanted to help her friend. She wanted her to be happy.

"What?" Y/N asked confused.

"Yeah,” Kira agreed with a smile. “Go be with Brett."

"It's fine. We can have another sleepover another night when Brett has plans with the guys or something," Lydia squeezed Y/N's forearm, reassuring her it's okay to leave.

"Are you sure?" She asked the girls.

"Don't ask them. Just say thank you and get in the car," Brett spoke through the phone.

Y/N chuckled as she shook her head, realizing how eager her boyfriend was. The girls nodded, giving Y/N permission to leave.

"I'll be there in a few minutes," she told Brett as she quickly stood up from her spot and held the phone against her ear with her shoulder. She began to gather her stuff before Lydia stopped her.

"Leave it. I'll take your stuff over tomorrow. Go be with your man," she smiled.

"Thanks," Y/N quickly hugged Lydia before she turned around and grabbed her keys on the way out. "Baby?" She spoke through her phone.

"Still here," Brett answered.

"I'm on my way," she smiled before she started the car.

"I know," she could practically hear the smile on his face as he spoke. "I'll be here waiting for you, baby. I love you."

"I love you, too, Brett," she said before she hung up and drove to spend the rest of the night with her boyfriend before someone could ruin it again tomorrow.

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everythingmustgo · 7 years

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heyO i was wonderin if i could do a tarrot reading and an analysis? if not its fine! but my signs are cancer sun, libra moon, leo rising, mercury cancer, venus virgo, mars leo, jupiter cancer, n saturn gemini! thank u in advance!

hello hello ofc u can !!! my tarot readings r £2 per card used so if u wanna have a look at my tarot page nd pick the spread u want then go for it!!! ill do ya analysis just now !okay so cancer suns r honestly my FAVS like my gf is a cancer nd shes so sweet nd caring, cancer suns want to protect u, theyre very maternal in their loving? very nurturing, they show their love thru looking after u and making sure ur okay. sooooooo emotional, all u water signs r crybabies tbh, ur emotions rly do dictate ur life and ur not in control of them so much as they r in control of u. the kind of ppl that cry from every emotion cuz they feel so deeply. the thing abt cancers tho is even tho theyre loving and caring, theyre always looking out for no. 1. big on self preservation, if they had the option to save u or them, theyd save their damn self no question. if a cancer if upset, anyone elses feelings go out the window. if u nd a cancer r upset, u can bet ur ass the cancer’s feelings come first. this is bc of how strong their feelings r for sure, they just dont have room in them for negative feelings that arent. theres ukno. they need so much emotional support, as caring as they r they struggle a lot with insecurity and need constant reassurance. often the only constant thing in their life is their own emotional turmoil, and they have a tendency to wallow in it and expect others to make it better. this is honestly one of the only bad qualities in cancers imo like I love water signs nd they rly r the most sweet nd caring ppl, they just have Issues nd r fiercely protective of themselves. cancer/libra is a good combo imo!!! libra moons r very diplomatic, have an innate sense of justice and a deep need for peace and harmony. bc this is ur moon sign this would suggest that this is ur strongest desire, this is rly what drives all of ur actions. ur a peacekeeper, u settle arguments nd everyone immediately seems to like u bc of the knack u have to see all sides of an argument. bc of this ur not strongly opinionated, u have principles but ur always open to persuasion and generally look for a balance between two options. big on equality, ur middle ground attitude to arguments can sometimes b mistaken for weakness of opinion but ur driven more by the need for fairness which is v strong in u. bc this is ur moon sign this is the part of u that cannot b suppressed: ppl will always see ur moon sign, nd while u have a certain amount of choice over how much of ur sun sign self u express (ur core personality, often one u grow into nd recognise within urself as u get older), ur moon sign cannot b hidden. ppl will always recognise ur balanced and fair nature, nd honestly for a libra moon this is a great thing bc ppl generally Love libras bc of this !!! they r fair nd will never immediately write off anyones opinions as invalid, somehow finding a way to agree with everyone. plus as an air sign u have great communication skills nd ppl will feel v comfortable talking to u. they have a veeeeeery strong need to b liked tho, which often drives their agreement w everyone. they need a thriving social life and to be in a relationship, most libras feel v lost w/o a partner. theyre romantics at heart, ruled by venus, but also feel they need a strong person in their life to make their decisions for them. this is the libra downfall, they r. wishy washy ppl. sometimes u NEED strong opinions? like even if u desire fairness, nd r immediately uncomfortable when fairness in a situation becomes almost impossible to achieve, there r times when u need to have a strong opinions? the idea of holding an opinion that some people will object to is stressful for a libra. this means ur one of the most indecisive, vague and easily influenced signs and u need to think for urself more!!! libras r all too dependant on others and see the route to peace and inner balance as pleasing everyone, which isnt always the case. u need to take urself and ur own feelings into consideration, be independent. as this is ur moon sign, ur approach to emotions is heavily ruled by ur libra. u keep things to urself as u dont like to distress others w ur emotions or hav them think differently of u bc of it, u see the solution to ur problems as to deal w them urself and problem solve ur way out of it, and while this is a skill of urs and u will most likely come up w good solutions, its not healthy to take it all on urself. I do love libras tbh but. they can b fake as hell w their niceness. u need to let urself open up more nd realise theres more to life than being liked, nd peace can b achieved w/o pleasing everyone, and w doing things for urself. ok ok I rly went to town on ya moon there so ill try nd keep ya rising short, so ur a leo rising which is v different from ur sun nd moon !!! all of ur signs r different elements which suggests ur v well rounded nd have a lot of different aspects to ur personality!!! ur leo rising means that the way u express urself and how others perceive u is far more dramatic than ur sun and moon, honestly u like to b seen as Extra. v focused on ur appearance, sociable and outgoing, loooooves to b the centre of attention. this im thinking is the strongest of ur signs nd fits very well w ur libra and cancer, who hav more vulnerability when it comes to others. leos have a lot of charm and likeability from the confidence they exude, which can likely be a protection for your libra fears of being disliked, and your highly emotional cancer sun. leos are also incredibly loyal and generous, a leo friend will absolutely spoil u and think nothing of spending lots of money on u (theyre v materialistic so often buying things for u is how they express affection). however they do often keep others in their shadow bc they like the attention so much, so its possible that until others get to know u very well, they will feel intimidated by u. u like to express urself dramatically and perhaps as opinionated in an attempt to hide ur libra indecisiveness and dependence on others to make ur decisions, which ur cancer sun will make u feel v insecure abt !!! theres a lot of interlinking insecurity between the signs with u lmao they work well together but theres certainly a lot going on. when ppl meet u, theyll hear abt ur social status and ur charm, but then discover ur sense of fairness and need for peace and equality, as well as ur emotional, nurturing side as they get closer to u.im gonna do a v brief explanation of ur planets if thats okay but if u want more info u can 100% ask for it its okay!!!so bc ur mercury is the same as ur sun sign its likely ur thought process, mental abilities and communication skills r v close to ur core personality and the way u think is an important part of who u r. bc its in cancer its gonna b emotional: ur mentality r hiiiighly emotion driven, and its hard for u not to let ur feelings get in the way of ur thought process and capacity for ideas and planning. ur 100% an overthinker, nd even tho u care for others deeply, ur plans will always result in u reaping the most benefits. ur venus virgo means ur a lover of beauty and a big romantic imo, but also a perfectionist. ur attracted to people u can fix up, which is a big downfall of virgos. they like to fix things, esp ppl, ESP in venus wow. u may notice a pattern of friends nd partners who rely on u to Fix Them, u may notice u r drawn to ppl w Issues bc u want to help them get better. ur a big worrier when it comes to relationships. leo mars wow this is the realm of action and u GO for it. everything u do u do 110% nd u wanna make a big show of it. u wanna b seen as an achiever, someone whos doing great things in life nd lookin hot while doing it. u want appreciation and attention for doing it. p much all of ur actions r to b noticed nd appreciated for what u do, its a big motive. ur in it for u. jupiter jupiter realm o wisdom nd knowledge, cancer again so id reckon important to u. mercury nd jupiter often go hand in hand so its fitting they r the same. again, emotional, again, caring, again, selfish. u have a deep understanding of ur own and others feelings, ur v intuitive nd use ur feelings to help u understand the world around u. ur feelings influence how u learn, if u dont love smth ur not gon learn it. cancer is ruled by the moon, id say ur v wise and trustworthy. saturn is jupiters restrictive counterpart, all abt boundaries nd structure. as its in gemini I reckon ur a fast learner nd once u learn ur lesson u will never forget. u like to scheme and plan, ur intelligent nd sociable but the way u plan ur life may distress u. u may often b highly conflicted over how u structure ur life, part of u loving the control of routine and part of u loving the freedom of no structure whatsoever.hope this made sense !!! u got any more questions let me kno, hmu when uve decided what spread u want for ur reading 💕

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