#it's not so complex umm

[lavendarneverlands]

Shameful Fandom Confession🤦‍♀️:

Did anyone else think “Rhys” was pronounced like Rye (the bread) & “eye”-“az” (like “eyes/ise”) so it sounded more like the vowels in “dyad” and was said to sound like “RISE” (because astrology, sun, moon, NIGHT COURT, etc.)😅😂🤣 cause I was this week years old and already half done with the series before I noticed😭

#acotar #acomaf #acowar #acofas #acosf #sarah j maas #Rhysand #Rhys #night court #feysand #name pronunciation #book lovers #fandom #fangirling #lol #today years old #deep dark secret #pronunciation #acotar language #acotar audiobooks #audiobooks #writer says #why are book names always spelled so complex #hermeeown #renesmee #it’s not Erin it’s Aaron or Ahren #and I still say am like umm ran like run #it’s not Alexander it’s Aleksander #I love writers #sara j mass

[marleneismydopamine]

lily evans headcanons

- digs her nails into her hand when she’s anxious or frustrated and often has nail dents in her palms bc of it

- has a teddy bear in the shape of a blue fox petunia gave her when they were kids. her names juniper and lily still sleeps with her when she’s scared or missing her sister

- generally prefers savoury to sweet but her comfort food is chocolate chip cookies and it’s the only thing that can cheer her up sometimes

- blueprint for every burnt out gifted kid

- has GAD and gets panic attacks often

- when she was a kid, lily would practice doing magic by changing her and petunias appearance. lily always changed her hair and eyes a different colour (one week she’d have blue hair and gold eyes and the next she’d have pink hair and purple eyes) as a creative outlet and one day she changed her hair red and eyes green and she liked it so much she kept it. petunia didn’t want to look colourful, she wanted to look glamorous so she always asked lily to make her hair exactly like marilyn monroe’s and to have her blue eyes. even after they stopped being close, lily always dyed her hair red and petunia always dyed her hair blonde to remember this moment of their childhood (poc evans family!!!)

- has a list of all the musical instruments she wants to learn how to play which includes the piano, violin, bass guitar, ukulele, clarinet and saxophone

- sometimes can’t sleep at night because her brain just won’t shut off

- whenever she gets close to someone all she can hear in the back of her mind is petunia saying “you’re a freak, no one will ever love you” and she thinks about how her first friend (severus) and her own sister can’t stand her now, so the person she’s close to will probably start to hate her as well so she tries to cut them off first. remus was the first person she tried to do this to and still want to be her friend

- she’s always trying to be the best at school because she sacrificed her relationship with her family to be there so she feels like she has to make her time at school worth it

- vans girlie

- had always wanted a cat and finally got a brown cat when she was 14. she named her nutmeg and she kinda became mary and marlene’s cat too

- her mother is extremely perfectionistic and critical and that kind of thinking worked its way into lily’s brain and now she feels like nothing she does is good enough

- incredibly close with her dad, she really wants him to be proud of her

- would rather die than admit she needs help

#umm… i swear when i started this i was gonna do happy headcanons #you know what? it’s fine bc lily is so complex and if no one else will flesh out her character i will do it myself #spreading that mentally ill lily evans agenda 💪 #i might do a part 2 of more happy ones #in case u couldn’t tell i find lily and petunias relationship so fascinating (aka devastating) #while writing this i realised i’m a lily kinnie #lily evans #marauders #marauders girls #valkyries #marylily #pandalily #jily #petunia evans #remus lupin

[devilfruitdyke]

people are like aren what are you drawing. dont ask you know full well its a thematic piece representing mental strength as physical strength.

[ID: a graphite drawing of a long haired muscular person holding a large weight like the world on their shoulders. dark water drips down from it and slips through the fingers of their right hand. their expression is tense. above them is an all caps caption - "didn't they warn you about me?" end ID.]

#is anyone else feeling so fundamentally different from other people in this chilis tn #not in a bad way tho. i like myself i guess #anyway im like yeah mwybe im not cut out for medical job but i cant do anything normal #normal people dont think about enzyme complexes every day #my dad is like umm. do you do that? 🤣 #what man. did you think youd stop having a Smart kid after the age of 9. #literally didnt they warn you about me #were chilling tho i need to go to bed #id added

[xxxcertifiednerdxxx]

Well i think i might be becoming an enhypen stan which is just great

#whyyyyy does Kpop have to do this to me #I STAN TOO MANY GROUPS WHY NOW DVDLDOFVDLD #and why are two of them still children Kpop idols need to stop being younger than me and more talented than me #just kidding the youngins are allowed to be talented but I will just deal with my inferiority complex #anyways umm why is ni-ki 17 and his voice is lower than my self esteem /j #they are all so beautiful and have amazing voices and dance skills #and they knew what they were doing when they picked the vampire concept I know everyone is eating that up #except me I don’t really vibe with blood so the drunken-dazed mv made me feel incredibly uncomfy #but the songs all slap #Have not picked a bias yet bc they’re all coming for my throat #get it? It’s it’s bc they’re vampires #i am a comedic genius #enhypen #kpop #nerd out #nerd-out

[osmiabee]

"So I feel like there's a growing acceptance of X marginalised identity (which is umm really great by the way!) but shout out to Y marginalised identity, I don't see nearly as many people talking about Y marginalised identity and it's not fair. So here's to Y identity it deserves just as much recogniti-"

shutupshutupshutupshutupshutthefuckup ❤️

#will you STOP. #PITTING IDENTITIES AGAINST EACHOTHER #i hate this fucking ''👉👈 ummm this is good but can we umm talk about THIS now'' attitude! make a positivity post thats actually positive #also i have never EVER seen a post like this that has an X identity thats even close to widely accepted even within tumblr #''so umm theres this growing acceptance of LGBT POC who have a complex relationship with culture and religion?'' WHERE???? #''theres been a lot of acceptance for lesbians with complex gender identity recently (and thats great!!) but-'' #NO ''BUT!'' #W H E R E ????? WHERE IS IT??????????? #''Theres a lot of positivity on here for trans women who do XYZ but what about-'' NO! shuT THE FUCK. UP. #GOD. #AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH #ITS JUST INVOKING BUZZWORD IDENTITIES AND PITTING THEM AGAINST EACHOTHER FOR CLOUT #STOP PHRASING IT LIKE VALIDITY AND ACCEPTANCE ARE FINITE AND METERED OUT FOR REDISTRIBUTION?!?! #YOURE NOT EVENING THINGS OUT!! DONT BE WEIRD!! #FUCK. #lmao anyway I'm fine. #brief bout of rage. #calm now

[vampfucker666]

i left a comment on someones fic from 2015 the other day bc i had reread it like. 3-4 times already and its only been maybe a week since i found it (its under 5k so not difficult to do but. u know) and they replied NEXT DAY. tbh i was kind of surprised usually its more hit or miss. i like to leave comments on older fics regardless but it was kind of fun to see them still sort of checking in on it lol

#im really bad at fic commenting so i usually only do it if i really liked it #and tbh if i really liked it its probably something that not a ton of people are going to come across. so i feel even more you umm #not obligated but internally encouraged lol #also if i read something published in the last ~2 weeks or its a wip im actively following inreally really try to leave comments #even if i kind of dont say much #ok actually ive been trying to read more comments on fics i like recently and im pretty normal so i dont have a weird complex or w/e #about it anymore. but i do wish i could be more eloquent without it taking an hour bc sometimes #i really want to pour all my appreciation out #but im just not that kind of wordy. i dont use language in that way.

[txttletale]

the "umm if hamas has the resources to arm its military why didnt it use those resources to simply make the gazan economy good" talking point is so fucking paradoxbrained. what can you even say to someone who is that removed from reality who thinks that complex infrastructure and guerilla warfare are conducted with the same fungible resource

#tattletxt #of course the answer is that they dont think that lmao they just want to victim blame palestinians for their own genocide

[beemovieerotica]

so I guess if you describe a decades-long international crisis involving multiple world powers as "complex" then somebody on tumblr is gonna be like "umm where is the complexity here?" to try and gotcha you?

and then you realize that their idea of simplicity is based solely on declaring who is morally at fault, and having decided that and posting about it online they're relieved the burden of ever conceptualizing an actual outcome to everything going on, because their activism begins and ends with identifying the "good guys" versus "bad guys" and not talking about what the fuck is supposed to happen next, and definitely not addressing any of the actual core political problems or history therein that have enabled this genocide

#this happened because i posted articles on houthi human rights abuses and cautioned against maybe not uncritically declaring support of them #is it really that difficult to a) agree that this is a genocide and the israeli government is to blame #and b) the people directly opposing them are actively engaged in their own human rights violations and should not be championed on #with the blind simplicity of cheering for a sports team? can we not do that? #this is what i mean by complexity ffs it's not difficult to understand #israel / palestine

[weird-is-life]

Sorry, i'm late

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Summary: You are late to your first date with Spencer and he misunderstands it as you standing him up

Warnings: language, angst, fluff, mentions of food, use of y/n and pet names

Words: 1k Masterlist

A/N: English is not my first language, so please excuse any grammar/spelling mistakes

It was your first date with Spencer, the cute, a little shy neighbour. You didn't know him long, only since you'd bumped into him one late night.

You were dragging a huge pot for your new plant to your also new apartment and Spencer just came from a case. Somehow, you started a small talk and it went from there.

One day, he gathered enough courage to ask you out and when you didn't immediately respond, he was ready to apologise and run away. But you said yes with a big grin, you liked Spencer a lot, so of course you said yes.

But the date didn't start the way, you thought it would have, like at all. You were late and you felt like crying because of it.

Your car decided not to work just when you went to leave. Then you went to call a taxi, but your phone was fucking dead.

You couldn't drive there, you couldn't call a taxi and most importantly you couldn't even call Spencer to let him know, that you were running late.

You literally ran to the closest bus stop and got on the first bus, which's stop was the nearest to the restaurant, you were supposed to meet at.

You looked worriedly at your watch, you didn't know if you were thankful or not for at least it working, 'cause it showed, that you were 20 minutes late.

Your leg was bouncing as you impatiently waited for the bus to stop. As soon as the door opened, you bolted out of there and sprinted to the restaurant. By the time you got there, your lungs were burning and your side hurt.

You wasted no time to go inside and look for him, but you couldn't find him.

"Umm miss, can i help you with something?" a waiter asked you.

"Yes, my friend made a reservation here? Reid, Spencer Reid?" you questioned, hoping he'd still be there.

"I'll look..." he looked at some paper and you nervously bit your lip,"Ah yes, table six. But i think your friend has already left."

Your face fell, god you felt so stupid for accidently standing him up, " y-you wouldn't happen to know when he left, would you?"

"I think it was around 5 minutes ago."

"Thank you so much..." you stumbled with a frown out of there, mad at yourself. Spencer probably thought you just said yes to make fun of him.

And indeed, he really thought that. Spencer anxious waited for you. The first ten minutes, he still thought you were coming, it was normal for people to be late. But when 10 minutes turned into 25, he gave up.

He really thought, you would come and worse he thought, you actually liked him. A big mistake as it appeared.

He payed for the water, he ordered and went home. The embarrasment was nowhere near as big as the dissapointment, he felt. Swallowing hard, he drove home and slumped on his couch, running his hands through his hair in frustration.

You on the other hand were running (speed walking, 'cause your stamina was gone) through the city again. You couldn't let Spencer think you stood him up, there was no way you'd let that happen.

And to your 'luck' it even started raining. You felt like the biggest fucking joke. You got to your apartment complex in record time. You were soaked to the bone and gasping for air, but still very determined to explain everything to Spencer.

You quickly knocked on his door. You stood there, a water puddle formed under you, while you waited for him to open. He didn't.

You could hear the sounds coming from the inside and you saw his car parked outside, so you knew, he was home.

You tried again, this time calling his name out, too.

You heard a shuffle of stuff and then the door swung open, " Yes?" He asked, avoiding looking at you.

"I'm so-"

"We don't need to do this. I get it, you didn't want to go out, it's okay" he went to close the door, but you put your hand on the door.

"Please y/n, j-just leave" he pleaded quietly. It wasn't the first time, someone played a cruel prank on him.

"B-but i did want to go out with you, i really did," you sighed and he looked at you for the first time, surprised to see you all wet and he clearly didn't believe you.

"I mean it. I was ready to leave, but my car wouldn't start. So I wanted to call you, let you know i was going to be late and then call taxi, but my phone was dead, well still is," you pulled it out of your pocket, finding it also drowned now, " So then i got on the first bus and ran to the restaurant. You weren't there a-and i asked the waiter, he said you left around 5 minutes ago. So I quickly ran here, hoping to explain, "

You didn't even notice, that Spencer started smiling halfway through your explanation as you rambled, looking everywhere but Spencer.

"I was really looking forward to the date, Spencer. I would never stand you up like that "you paced anxiously from one foot to the other, eyes fixed on the floor.

"You ran to the restaurant?" Spencer  asked, astonished and amused.

"Well yeah," you sheepishly admited, "as i said, i was excited about the dinner."

Spencer couldn't stop smiling, he was so relieved to find out, it was just a misuderstanding, " W-would you like to come inside for a pizza?"

"What?" you looked at up in confusion at Spencer and found him softly smiling at you.

"I'm not mad at you, i believe you" he said.

"Really?"

"Yes, so would you like to come over for pizza?"

"Definitely," you said, maybe too quickly, but you didn't really care,"just give me a second. I have to change out of these" you gestured at your soaked clothes.

"Great, i'll leave the door open, yeah? So you can just walk inside" he beamed at you. Spencer was glad, that you said yes to this back up plan.

"Okay, i'll be right back" you sprinted to the elevator with a big smile, making Spencer chuckle at you.

Maybe the date didn't start the way you imagined it would, but the rest of it was better than your expectations.

...

...

...

Hey guys, thank you for reading. Feedback is always appreciated. Please let me know what you think. Also, i'm thinking about taking some requests, sooo if you have any feel free to send them in.

Have a great day and stay safe everybody. Peace out ☀️

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid angst #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction

[thebucketpail]

When You Accidentally Kill a Clown pt. 2

Pt. 1 Ao3

I couldn't let the brain rot die

-----

Breath Danny, this is all fine. This was however not fine. Danny stared, mouth agape, food untouched, as The RED godamned HOOD sat across from him tearing into a burger and fries. The man had taken off his helmet and almost sent Danny into a panic before seeing he had another mask underneath. Which, honestly, shouldn’t be surprising, from what Tucker’s told him these bats are hella secretive and have an insane amount of contingencies. He thought back to the time when Tucker had tried installing similar plans in case of emergency, which mostly fell through after like two attacks. Only a few plans survived and receive semi-regular upkeep.

“Dude you gonna eat that or what?” Danny was pulled from their thoughts by the vigilante sitting across from them. Right, that. As a response they lifted a couple fries to his mouth and Ancients these are good. Hood let out a chuckle at whatever face Danny had pulled, before his voice turned a bit more serious.

“So how’d you come across the Joker? Much less put a crater in his gut?” Ah, so this was an interrogation, Danny can do an interrogation. He swallowed a few more fries before responding.

“Um, well, I was just walking back to my dorm, and the guy jumped out of an alley and grabbed me. He started talking about the Waynes and… some other stuff. So I panicked and then he was dead.” Danny trailed off, stuffing the burger in his mouth to avoid talking more. And if it weren’t for his nerves this burger would have tasted amazing, but at this moment it was just a burger.

Hood nodded, “And the smoking crater? Are you a meta or something?” And there was the question Danny constantly thinks about because yes, technically he would be considered a meta, after all his dad and his sister both have the gene so it would be so easy to explain away his powers like that. But it felt so much like a lie. Like he was denying the fact of his true nature. But Danny also really didn’t feel like explaining the complexities of ghosts at whatever Ancients forsaken time it is, to the Red Hood, over a burger and shakes. So he nodded, gesturing flippantly with his hand in a vague either or motion.

Hood looked weary but took the answer nonetheless. “I took care of the body and called some friends. Do you mind if I tell them who did it or would you like to keep it under wraps?” He said, leaning back in the booth.

“Umm,” Danny ducked his head and dropped his hand to his lap, “I’d rather not have my name or face publicized, if that's alright.” Hood Hmm’d in agreement before tilting his head to one side, A smile smile tug at the corner of his lips which, if Danny wasn’t under an intense amount of stress right now, would actually be kind of cute.

“Speaking of,” Hood said, his tone shifting to something Danny couldn’t detect, “I don’t believe I got your name.” and that’s a lie, Danny had told him in the alley way. But then, Hood had been in a bit of shock so maybe he forgot?

“It’s Danny,” Danny said again, a bit more sure this time, “Danny Fenton.” He paused for a moment before tacking on “ He/ they” and holding out his hand for Hood to shake.

That smile on the vigilantes face grew more as he took Danny’s hand, “Hood, he/him. Pleasure to make your acquaintance” was that a wink? It was hard to tell with the domino mask, but did RED HOOD just fucking wink at them.

“So how old are you Danny? You said you were heading back to your dorm, are you a student?”

It took a few moments for their brain to catch up before Danny replied, “Yeah, I just turned 20, I’m starting my first semester at Gotham U in a couple days. I’ve uhh,” Danny ducked his head again, reaching to rub at the back of his neck, “I’ve only actually been in Gotham for like three days.” he muttered sheepishly. Looking back up at Hood through his bangs.

“You’ve only been in Gotham for for three days,” hood whispered to himself, his brows drawing together in confusion, “And you killed the Fucking Joker???” He half shouted, incredulously.

Danny’s Head shot around scanning the dingy burger joint, no one seemed to have noticed. Hood looked apologetic, then a war of emotions fluttered across his face before that smile, that Danny had now decided is definitely cute (Cause that’s not a lot to unpack), crept its way back onto the man’s face.

“So what do you study?” Hood asked, resting his chin on his hand and tilting his head just slightly.

Danny fought the blush threatening to creep up their face because no, no this serial killer crime boss is not cute you absolute idiot. And instead they launched into an explanation of how theyŕe majoring in Aerospace engineering and Astronomy, because this is his obsession and he could talk about his obsession all day if he could.

----------

Jason stared at the man before him, excitedly explaining a bunch of star stuff that, to be honest, he didn’t really understand. But this man was so goddamn cute. Danny apparently is the kind of person that talks with their hands when they get excited, because the wild gestures they were making only managed to captivate Jason more.

The two talked for almost another hour before Jason had to drop them off at their dorm because, “You almost got murdered once tonight and you got lucky, I’m going to escort you home whether you like it or not.” before returning to his patrol route.

He made a mental note while he was beating up a potential mugger, to look into this Danny Fenton, to maybe meet in civvies, because there is no way Jason is going to lose this guy.

Pt. 3

#danny phantom #dp x dc #dc #red hood #jason todd #danny fenton #dead on main #bucket writes things #danny is so confused #jason is practically in love #is danny technically a meta? probably? but uhh we dont mess with that

[g4yforethan]

rescue

pairing: leon kennedy x gn reader

summary: leon saves reader from escaping raccoon city and falls for them

warnings: cursing, pure fluff, kissing!

a/n: been obsessed with resident evil for a while now so i just wanted to do this for my re fanss ;)) also ik the pics i chose are from re4 just go with it.

you were in your apartment folding laundry in the living room. the tv was turned on as re-runs of tv shows played in the background. all of a sudden, “BREAKING NEWS” displayed over your television screen. as you got closer to the tv, you heard screams and bangs coming from your complex. “we interrupt this broadcast as Raccoon City has fallen victim to a mysterious virus spreading throughout the city. We advise all residents to take shelter and gather resources in case of evacuation.” the broadcast lost signal and the screen was now black.

you were terrified by this news as you lived alone and had little to no knowledge about what to do in a situation like this. then, a bang on your door startled you and almost caused you to have a heart attack. “who’s there??” you shouted out the most cliche horror movie question but there was no response. you got closer to the door, tip-toeing all the way to your peephole. you looked through and saw a man standing there but he didn’t look like a man. his skin was pale as a ghost and he was missing his right arm. you gasped and ran towards your window to escape.

when you got to the front of your apartment complex , you ran left towards a gas station hoping that someone would be able to help. once you got there, it was pitch black and there didn’t seem to be anyone inside. you walked around before hearing screams coming from the backroom. gunshots go off as you run to take cover. all of a sudden, a man runs out and grabs you. "IT'S NOT SAFE HERE LET'S GO!" he screamed as he pushed outside towards his car. you went inside and finally got a good look of him. even in the situation, you noticed how attractive he was but tried not to focus too much on that. "thank you so much. i'm so confused! what is happening?!" you asked him as he drove out of the gas station and onto the road. "i could ask you the same thing! listen it's my first day on the job and this shit happens. i must have great luck i guess."he rolled his eyes and tried to find a safe place for you both.

"the news reporter said something about a virus but i always thought a virus would just mean a cold or something not FUCKING zombies!" you screamed as you still tried to grasp what was happening. the man could tell you were shaking from anxiety and pulled over. "hey hey it's okay. whatever happens i'll make sure we both get out of here safe and sound. it's my job." you smiled at him and felt your heart rate go down. "thanks for that. it was sweet. what's your name?" "Leon. Leon S. Kennedy. yours?" "y/n. you have a cute name leon." you noticed leon started to blush and put his hand on your shoulder. "if we make it out of here alive, can i take you out on a date?"

you were taken back by what he said. one because you two had just met and second you were both in the middle of a life or death situation. "umm yeah sure i would love to." you both smiled at each other as leon turned to the road and found an exit out of raccoon city. after a while, he found a motel that was vacant and the two of you went inside to rest. "how about we just stay here for the night and get some rest?" he asked you as he took off his shirt and pants and went into bed. "i mean yeah sure if that's okay." the two of you laid in bed as leon kissed your forehead and wrapped his arms around you. "i'm so glad i met you tonight. we're gonna be okay i promise. just get some rest y/n." he reassured you with another kiss on your shoulder. you turned and kissed him on the lips. "thank you leon. so after all of this is over, where are we going for our first date?"

#male reader #male reader insert #malereader #men #gay love #gay smut #gender neutral insert #gender neutral y/n #gender neutral reader #leon kennedy #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x y/n #resident evil #resident evil x reader #resident evil 2 remake #resident evil 2

[firefox-official]

I fucking hate Seth McFarlane. He set a standard for adult animation that's simply, "edgy referential jokes with shit and piss and an art style simple enough to be rigged and complex enough to be watchable"

It's so fucking lazy, no wonder animators and writers are on strike.

im ignoring the fact that you implied the writers strike is against seth macfarlane. umm whatever influence his shows had on the animation world isnt his fault ? Like. he was literally a career animator long before family guy? he animated on hanna barbara cartoons he went to school for animation he didnt just sit down one day and decide to write a show. watch the first ten seasons and get back to me about your complaints

#seth macfarlane is literally on strike too😭

[the-froschamethyst4]

Choking

➤ Day 2

𖤐Pairing: Ghost x Neighbor! F! Reader

𖤐Pronouns: She/Her

𖤐Warnings: Smut, NSFW, Choking, age gap, P in V, language, aggressive behavior, some eating out, some boob grabbing, ass slapping, fingering, kissing, passing out

𖤐Summary: Ghost felt horny after work. He was bored and wanted to have some fun, so he asks his neighbor Y/n to help him just a bit on his situation

——————

———————

5:00PM

Simon Ghost Riley just got off of work. He was bored the entire day working. He only did Traffic Stops at work and everything was boring and earlier today when he checked his phone something had popped up.

He followed his neighbor Y/n's Instagram account and what popped up was her in a red two-piece bikini laying by the pool at their apartment complex.

Her legs looked perfect, they looked smooth and shiny. One photo was then of her chest her bikini top was small and the triangles just barely covered her nipples.

He opened the door to his apartment and rubbed his tired eyes and messed with his crotch as his dick was hardened by his little neighbor.

Now, you're also probably wondering why he follows her on Instagram, well...she gave him her Instagram to get a hold of her.

Ghost didn't have Instagram and barely knew how to use it; he didn't have any sort of social media. He thought that no one should know about his business, not even his own friends from work, and was wondering why she just didn't give him her phone number instead?

He removed his uniform and looked down at his boxers seeing his friend standing up. He grabbed some sweatpants and walked out of his apartment going across the hallway to his little neighbor's door.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

The door opened and he looked down at Y/n who was in black booty shorts, and an over-sized t-shirt that went to her mid-thigh.

Ghost could barely control himself.

Holy fuck

"Oh hi, Simon. What can I do you for?" She asked all innocent and kind to him.

"Hey, Y/n...umm~ I was wondering if you can help me with something?"

"Oh okay, like what?"

"I have some furniture to move, and I was wondering if you could help me?"

"Oh yeah, let me get some socks on and I'll be right over," she gave him a sweet smile, one that makes Ghost melt every time he sees her.

He went back to his apartment and messed with his crotch again, but it was hard and sensitive. He bent over and his arm was against the wall as he moved his hand from his crotch.

"F-Fucking hell," he groaned as there was a small knock at the door, he knew it was Y/n and he opened the door letting her inside.

"Hey, I'm all set," she walks inside.

"Right..." he shut the door. He looked down at her as she really did seem like she wanted to move stuff around but really...that's not what he wants.

Ghost towered over Y/n making her turn when the light was being blocked.

"Oh hi," she said, looking up at Ghost.

"Hi," he picks her up and with instinct her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms went around his neck. Ghost's hands rested on her waist.

"W-What are you d-doing?" She asked.

"You posted a picture of yourself on your Instagram, and I've been wanting to fuck you all day long."

His lips landed on hers. They started to make out and Y/n wanted to push him away but deep down she didn't really want to. Ghost started to walk to his couch and sat down with Y/n now on his lap.

His hands went from her waist to her butt. He started to massage her butt earning a soft moan from her. His hands then went up her shirt removing it over her head and tossing it on the floor at his feet.

He pushed her on her back, he unhooked her bra and removed her shorts tossing them. He looked down at her naked body.

"You don't wear panties under your shorts?"

"I was home. So, there's no point in wearing them..." she looked embarrassed.

"Don't be embarrassed, love," he bent down close to her neck and kissed it also leaving some small purple bruises on her neck.

Her legs wrapped around his waist as she felt cold air hit her body and made the hairs on her arm stand up and her nipples hardened against his chest.

He licked his middle and ring fingers and slowly shoved them inside her lower half. She bucked her hips up and moaned his name, he kissed her lips, and her moans were muffled into the kiss.

He sat up and wrapped his big veiny hand around her neck. Her little hands held his as he was holding her tight but not tight enough to cut off airflow.

"Ah~ S-Si," she moans as he shoved his fingers faster inside of her earning a loud moan from her lips. He smirks as he squeezed around her neck just a bit tighter and his fingers moved faster.

Her lower half sounded wet, she moaned and gripped at his hand that was around her neck and her other hand gripped the one pushing his thick fingers inside of her.

"A-Ah~" she huffed out a moan as she felt herself about to cum on his fingers which she soon did.

He pulled his fingers out and sucked them clean, his hand around her neck stayed there. It was still tight, and she could barely catch her breath now.

He sat up and removed his sweatpants and removed his boxers as well. His dick sprung out and Y/n's eyes widened at his huge dick.

He pushed himself inside of her and she moaned as her walls were being stretched.

"AHH~!" She moans as her hands clawed at the hand around her neck.

"Si-Simon," she moaned. He didn't listen as he thrusted quickly in and out of her. Her legs squeezed around his waist.

She now could barely breath. Ghost kept going and moaned when he could feel her tighten around his dick.

"H-Holy hell," he moans.

"Mmm~" she whines clawing at his hand. "S-Si I-I can't b-breath," she cried. When she talked it felt like her breath was just being taken away and she couldn't catch her breath.

Ghost looked at Y/n's face and saw how red her face was. He quickly removed his hand and he started to cough, it sounded hard, like a flu cough, and she took deep breathes.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he bent down close to her face and kissed her temple. She was still taking deep breaths.

"I-It's okay," she said as she rubbed at her neck, and he was slowly thrusted in her now.

Her arms went around his neck as he held her waist. He put all his weight on her as he was now lazily thrusting inside of her.

He felt himself twitch inside of her and he pulled out watching cum leak from her.

He bent down and licked between her folds. Her thighs tighten around his head moaning and gripping his dirty blonde hair. He smacked her thighs leaving a handprint on her thigh. She moaned when he smacked her.

He moved his mouth and pulled her close to his dick. He brought her leg up and kissed her inner thigh.

"Ah~ S-Simon," his hand went up her stomach and groped her breast. She moaned as he also pinched her nipple. She moaned and grabbed his hand.

He kissed, sucked and bit at her inner thigh and did the same to the other thigh.

"Si-Simon."

Simon then smacked her thighs again and she moaned again, he smirked and started to become a little more aggressive. He turned her over, he sat up on her knees and brought her ass up and her face was pushed into the cushions of the couch.

He pushed her face into the cushions, he smacked her butt and squeezed her butt as well.

He moved down and licked between her wet folds, she moans and gripped the soft couch cushions. He pushed his fingers back inside of her. She moaned into the cushions, and he smacked her ass again.

"Si-oh my god," she let out a breathy moan.

Ghost's eyes were dead as he listened to her moans. He stood back up and pushed his dick back inside of her and gripped the back of her neck and brought her up as her face was against the side of his. His left hand went to her throat and his right hand went to her left boob squeezing her and holding her up.

She was a mess when he started to thrust inside of her. Her hands went to the back of his head and gripped his hair. He pushed her back down on the couch cushions and kept moving in and out of her.

"Ah! Ah! Ah!" She kept moaning as she felt herself about to cum again.

Ghost could feel her about to cum too and moved quicker and watched her squirt onto his dick and on her lower stomach.

"You are such a messy girl," he said, pulling out and running his fingers between her wet folds and licking his fingers and her clean.

She fell flat on the couch and Simon smirked and chuckled at her.

"Come on, love, let's go get you clean," he said, pulling her up and taking her into his bathroom running a bath and placed her into the tub and he got behind her in the hot water.

She was so relaxed and leaned back and hit his chest and let out a satisfied moan.

He rubbed some soap in a loofa and started to rub it on her skin.

"Thank you, Simon."

"Please call me, Ghost if you want."

"Ghost?"

"I'm a LT in the Military and a deputy for the Police and my codename is Ghost in the Military."

"Oh, I understand." She smiled at him.

"That...that smile of yours. I love that smile of yours. Every time you smile at me, it makes me melt. I'm so glad, I was able to..."

"Fuck me?"

"Yeah~ I was trying to find a better way to say it, but you took the words right out of my mouth," he smirks. "Also did I hurt you when I choked you?"

"I mean...I'm okay, it just took my breath away a little, but I'm okay, I promise, I'm okay," she said.

---------

"So, I'm guessing you never had any sort of furniture to move?"

"No, no, I didn't, sorry I trapped you here."

"Don't say that. You didn't trap me," she smiles.

"But I'm sorry that I did that though."

"It's okay," she said as she opened the door. She was ready to go back home.

"Hey...if you want to, later tonight you can come back over, and we can have dinner."

"Yeah...I'll come back...what time?" She asks.

"Umm~ in an hour maybe?"

"An hour?" She questioned.

"Yeah...we can make the food together," he leaned against his doorframe.

"Yeah, I'll come back soon," she smiles.

"Good...ummm~ see ya' later."

"See ya," she smiles.

#cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod x reader #fandom #fanfic #call of duty #mw2 #cod #ghost cod #ghost mw2 #simon ghost x reader #ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #ghost #simon riley smut #simon riley x you #simon riley x reader

[kittenintheden]

What the heck your story replies are perfect! Umm let’s see: What if a Tav that’s still learning to read asks Astarion to read aloud some of the books she pilfered reclaimed from their latest temple exploration.

It’s porn. Very, very descriptive porn. Bonus if it’s vampire porn.

"Astarion?" Tav says quietly, poking their head around the open flap of his tent. They find him sitting cross-legged inside, his eyes scanning over the book laying open in his lap. He looks up at their inquiry and lifts his chin with a cavalier smile.

"Well, if it isn't my favorite companion," he says, voice lilting. "What can I do for you?"

Tav clears their throat and ducks inside, settling on their knees just beyond. They have a book of their own in their hands, their fingers impatiently tapping against the cover. "I wondered if you might be up for giving me another reading lesson."

He hums, tipping his own tome shut and setting it aside. "Something from that broken up old temple we found today? Give it here, let's see."

Hesitantly, they hold it out for him and he accepts it, gaze scanning the binding. He lifts a brow, then flips it open and peruses a page. Then another. He snaps it shut again.

"I don't know if this is the best book for a, ah," he says, contemplating his next words. His mouth tics up on one side as he glances them up and down. "Reading lesson."

Tav frowns. "Why not? I thought you'd be interested, given the picture on the cover."

Astarion peers down at the cover and huffs a laugh. "Well. I can certainly see why you'd think so. The resemblance is... resemblant."

It's a finely-wrought etching of two people, one swooning against the other. The figure behind supports the other about the waist with one hand, the opposite pulling their hair aside to reveal their neck. The dominant figure leans toward their throat as if for a kiss, pointed teeth showing past their lips.

Tav shrugs. "Is it too advanced? Is that why?"

Astarion gives a sharp laugh and puts his fingers in front of his mouth as if he's trying to put it back. "Erm, no, dear. I think you could puzzle through it just fine."

"Okay..." Tav says, perplexed. "Then what?'

"Bleeding Hells," he mutters, rubbing a forefinger in the space between his eyes. "Why don't you try reading the title out for me? Let's start there."

Tav takes the book back and looks at the lettering on the front. It's the Common alphabet, so not too terrible to parse, though they're still working on some of the more complex blended sounds.

"In..." they start, running their finger beneath the words and feeling the soft leather beneath. "the... Embra... Embrace?"

Astarion is leaning on one hand and he gives a patient nod.

"In the Embrace... of... the... Nig... Nig-het..."

"Night, sweet thing," Astarion says softly. "G beside H is silent."

"Right," Tav says, looking again. "So, In the Embrace of the Night... stalker."

"Try again."

Tav studies the letters again. They spot their mistake. "Nightsucker."

Astarion nods.

They look very pleased with themselves, beaming at him. "Got it! What's the problem, again?"

The vampire closes his eyes and holds his hands in prayer position in front of his lips as if he's steeling himself. He opens his scarlet eyes and moves his hands away. "Shall I read you a page or two to start? Maybe then you'll understand."

Thrilled, Tav nods and returns the tome, sitting themselves more comfortably as Astarion leafs through the pages.

"Ooooh," he says, his voice lifting. "This passage looks promising." He lowers the book in front of him so Tav can scoot around and follow along as he reads, committing symbol to sound.

Astarion's carefully kept fingernails run along the text inside, showing where he's reading. In his practiced, soothing Upper City voice, he begins to read. "A creature of the night is good for only two things: destruction or seduction. Perhaps both at once, if a person is lucky. And tonight, Yolanda is very, very lucky."

Tav subconsciously nods along, feeling a little thrill of pride every time they mentally catch the word before Astarion says it aloud. Their companion continues to read about Yolanda and her new vampiric friend, until the story takes... a bit of a turn.

"Yolanda gasps rapturously as Armondo suckles at the crease of her thigh, skin flushing as his sinful tongue laps closer and closer to the place she needs it most, to her swollen secret spot, and when at last he catches it in a languid swirl, she keens out his-"

Tav puts their hands on either side of the book over Astarion's and forces him to snap it shut, their cheeks flaming. Slowly, they turn their head to find Astarion's face very, very close, a look of deep amusement in his eye and a smirk stretching his lips.

"I have to go," Tav says. "Keep the book." Their legs aren't immediately cooperative, but when they manage to get them to respond, they scramble inelegantly for the exit. "Good night."

"Sweet dreams," Astarion calls after them, still smirking. Once they've gone, he opens the book back up to that same passage.

"What will Armondo do next, I wonder," he whispers.

After about a minute, when he's sure Tav is safely tucked away in their own tent and likely screaming into their makeshift pillow, he clears his throat and squirms, reaching down to adjust the front of his trousers. They've gone quite tight.

#astarion #astarion bg3 #astarion smut #astarion x tav #astarion x gn!tav #kitten writes #ask box #lol okay this one was fun