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oneatlatime · 4 months

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The Guru

Happy 2024 everyone and welcome to the first time I managed to type 2024 without first typing 2023! Oh and also a write up of The Guru. That too.

Me too Iroh. Me too.

So Zuko is riding high on that post-crisis 'time to get my life together' buzz that, similar to 3 am life plans, should absolutely not be listened to. Wonder how long before he crashes and burns? There's literally 2 episodes left, so I'm guessing one and a half?

Poor Sokka. My boy's got anxiety.

I don't know if it's a monk thing, an airbender thing, an Avatar thing, or an Aang thing, but I envy his complete lack of nerves.

How is Appa ok with them splitting up for a week after JUST getting them back?

I paused in a funny place. Have bonk-eyed Appa.

I love them comparing heights. What do you want to bet that that guy on the right was one of the youngest allowed to go fight, and Sokka made a big deal about how they're almost the same age and surely that means he can go too, right?

A lot of these Southern Water Tribe people have dreads or braids. That's neat.

Bato's arm is still messed up. That's some good continuity.

I've found the source of Katara's cheek bones. I guess Sokka takes after his mum.

Ok I know this is a really emotional moment (and it is! Sokka's spent two seasons earning this!) but my brain fixated on the furs and briefly thought they were sky bison pelts.

"It's been a difficult week for me." This guy thinks the Kyoshi Warriors are there to provide him therapy. Someone please just crown the bear instead.

He just gave away literally every relevant plot point AND outlined how to make sure all these plot points don't succeed. Crown. The. Bear.

Maybe if these generals spent less time playing with their giant model Earth Kingdom and more time general-ing, the war wouldn't suck so much?

Pretty.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the designs, the colour palette, the music, the sound design of this air temple. I love everything about it. If I had the chance to live anywhere in the Avatar universe, it would be here. Even in its ruined state it's such a refreshing contrast to the claustrophobia of Ba Sing Se. I can feel the freshness of the breeze through the screen.

"A spiritual brother of your people" an adult perspective on a near extinct culture! What a resource!

"and a personal friend of Monk Gyatso" an old as balls perspective. He's got to be at least 130.

Anthropology cul de sac time: this guy is so valuable as a resource on the Air Nomads. There's probably parts of Air Nomad culture that Aang can't ever accurately talk about, because he was a kid when he left, and there was almost certainly stuff that the adults kept to themselves, or only shared with the older Air Nomads. This Guru doesn't seem to be an Air Nomad himself, but there's a good chance that there is knowledge that he has, that Aang doesn't. Aang should be nerding out more about this. I'll do the nerding out for him.

Aang just breezes right by that Gyatso name drop like it's nothing. Huh.

Oh hey Toph. I'd forgotten she was in a box. Tweedle dum and Tweedle dumber really are quite the pair. What's their plan for keeping her fed and watered? Actually, these guys apparently don't know that maps exist, so it's probably never occurred to them that humans need sustenance. They'll rock up to the Bei Fong estate with corpse Toph and wonder why they aren't getting the reward money.

Mai gets called out in-universe for shopping at Hot Topic.

Ty Lee's buttering up of Azula is getting less and less subtle as the season progresses. It's a testament to Azula's lack of awareness that she's hasn't noticed that, and that Ty Lee can get away with it.

Azula's right that it's an extraordinary opportunity. The King gave them quite literally every piece of info required to overthrow his kingdom in a 25 second conversation. I can't blame her for taking advantage of such an easy win.

That's a very effective unimpressed face. And a very impressive beard.

It's funny to see a spiritual concept from the real world pop up in a show that includes things like bending and giant fish possession. The mention of Chakras kind of sticks out. They couldn't invent a Avatar universe version?

"Once you begin this process, you cannot stop until all seven are open." Well that doesn't feel like foreshadowing at all.

This episode should be called "Aang's self-care Journey." It's about time the kid had a me day that wasn't avoidance-based.

Fear: Losing Katara - makes sense. Losing control of his powers via fish possession - makes sense. The Fire Lord - makes sense. But the Blue Spirit? He helped. Doesn't make sense.

Guilt: Running away - makes sense, although I thought he'd worked through that with Katara in the storm. Nuking that idiot General's base - makes sense, but boy did he quite literally ask for it.

This guru is saying some wonderfully accurate, and realistic, things. I love that he's not taking the Katara route of denying anything is wrong. He's going for the acknowledge, then heal route. And yes, it's unfair of me to compare the emotional maturity of Katara to a century+ old spiritual expert.

I'm going to ruin the immersion here and point out that Sokka's dad's voice actor voiced a bunch of characters in season 1. He's doing an excellent job, but couldn't they get a unique voice for a character that's so important (albeit offscreen) to Sokka?

That's an incredibly roundabout way of avoiding pointing out that the Southern Water Tribe are active participants in a bloody war. Sure, we can show multiple characters with visible scarring from horrific burns, but heaven forbid we imply that the Southern Water Tribe sinks ships. The parameters for what is and isn't appropriate on this show sometimes make no sense.

"Aren't you listening? I said the rest of you men get ready for battle." He hasn't seen his boy in two years, but fifteen minutes in his company and he knows exactly what needs to be said and how. That's some top tier parenting. Dad of the year. Dad of the century. Only decent Dad in this show that isn't technically an uncle.

"Follow your passion Zuko, and life will reward you." Great advice for your eight year old audience. Also a great way to end up unemployed.

Positive Sokka creeped me out a few episodes ago. Now positive Zuko is freaking me out too.

Pretty.

Back to Chakras! Shame: Burning Katara - makes sense. But that's it? To have the inner peace of mind of a twelve year old who's somehow only ever done one thing that he's ashamed of.

Is there anyone in the earth kingdom who isn't stupid? Once again wondering at the network's standards. Visible burn injuries are fine, but Mai can't say 'Shut up." It's got to be Shush up. Although I do seem to recall of brief time in the early 2000s when Shut Up was treated as a curse on par with Shit or Fuck. Maybe that was just at my school.

Chakras again! Even for a show that often has an A, B, and C plot, this narrative is ping ponging around a bit much.

Grief: nothing major, just a whole nation. Makes a horrific amount of sense. but I don't buy that he can get over grieving the whole world as he knew it by thinking about his crush. That's way too high a pedestal for Katara to be placed on.

Lies: Not accepting he's the Avatar. Interesting that not accepting that he's the Avatar and not accepting that he's a firebender are two different problems.

I see you reusing the opening credits footage. Your blue filters can't fool me.

PRETTY

Illusion: So we're relearning what we learned in The Swamp. Aang's probably the person currently alive least likely to believe in the rigid separation of the nations anyway. This doesn't feel like an illusion he's subject to?

The way this episode dances between its narrative threads is so great. It's all woven in so beautifully. And this makes perfect sense! Toph's spent her life secretly doing things excellently that everyone says are completely beyond her capabilities. Life has taught her that the statement "you are not able to" doesn't apply. Of course immutable laws of bending physics are treated with the same respect as an adult telling the champion of the Earth Rumble that she's can't earthbend beyond breathing exercises. If you told her that humans can't fly, she'd figure out how within the week.

Plot collision incoming.

Interesting that Katara initially recognises Zuko by his voice rather than his scar.

I'm pretty sure that Zuko and Iroh don't know about the whole brainwashing thing, but wouldn't it be hilarious if Zuko introduced himself to Katara as Joo Dee, and his uncle Joo Dee, welcome to the Jasmine Dragon, can I take your order? That would throw Katara into one hell of a moral quandary.

Katara being framed as the solution for Chakra number four comes back to bite Aang, as she's the problem in Chakra number seven. I knew that pedestal was too high.

I've changed my mind. This episode should actually be called "Half a dozen reasons why everyone should just learn to keep their goddamn mouths shut already."

So is anyone going to let Zuko and Iroh know that they're now in immediate danger and need to leave, like, yesterday?

I think the Guru is going for the whole 'if you love them, let them go, and they'll come back to you' thing. Don't cling, in other words. But for the sake of the plot he's suddenly lost his ability to explain Chakras in a way that makes them seem like the logical thing to do. The only clunky bit of this episode so far.

May I introduce you to our Lord and Saviour Toph?

"I am the greatest earthbender in the world." Yes. Yep. Yeah. That's now a quantifiable fact, and it's correct. Look on ye mighty and despair. She's even got Bumi beat.

Earth Tongue Running is a bit wonky looking but it covers a crazy amount of distance.

What's the range on Toph's earth sense? Can she sense what direction Ba Sing Se is?

I hope those two idiots' horse bird is ok.

"You don't know how much this means to me dad." He does. Very much so.

Every word out of this guy's mouth is precision engineered to make Sokka feel like a million bucks and I for one think it's about time someone built him up. Also, seeing this makes me realise how few good parents there are in this show. It's a trope of kids' adventure shows that the parents fundamentally can't be there, but I also think it's a commentary on yet another thing that this war has messed up.

Hey look! Being a man is knowing where you're needed the most, and right now that's in Ba Sing Se, protecting your sister! I love narratives that tie their themes up with a pretty bow on top.

This is Azula laying a trap, right? Which means that Katara squealed to someone about the exact location of Iroh and Zuko's tea shop. Don't like the implications of that.

Photos taken seconds before disaster.

Final Thoughts

This episode was a lot! I mean that in a good way! But I felt a bit like the Maxell Blown Away Guy, the way I kept getting assaulted by yet another plot thread. Don't get me wrong, this isn't a criticism. I think the switching between plot threads and the amount of info in this episode worked 99% of the time. But I'm kind of in awe at the balancing act the writers pulled off and I'm sort of sitting here blinking a bit trying to fit all this stuff in my head. I'm probably going to forget half the stuff I wanted to talk about in this write up, so here goes nothing.

Given the Azula reveal in at the end of last episode, I thought that this would be the episode where the shit hits the fan. I was wrong. I'm glad I was wrong. An episode of set up is required and is nice breathing room, even an episode as busy as this. And I got to leave Ba Sing Se! But this does mean that next episode is going to be calamity after calamity.

Aang and his Chakras: I'm fascinated by this guru. I hope he comes back. That brings the total number of people who were alive before the war started up to three: Aang, Bumi, Guru Patik.

I'm impressed that the run through of the Chakras rarely felt like an info dump. The onion and banana juice thing didn't work for me, but I'm sure it worked for people in the target age bracket. Kids love burp jokes.

So many shows sprinkle in tragic backstories for flavour and then never have them influence the character in the present. It was a nice contrast to see a show take a whole episode to tell Aang "yeah all that sucked. It's ok to feel down about it. Here's how you move forward."

Sokka and his dad: Love it. Love it so much. I love seeing Sokka built up, and he definitely deserves it, but I wonder if this is the reward for a character arc well done, or the set up for a character arc that's about to start? Is his dad's praise his prize for crossing the finish line, or is it so he's built up with farther to fall?

I loved seeing more of the Southern Water Tribe. I loved the fashion. There's a lot of variety in accessories and variations on a few basic elements like those knee guard things. I loved their hairstyles. I loved how cozy and communal that command tent felt. I loved their ships. I wonder how often these guys work out, that they can make loading ramps that are presumably deployed and stashed out of the way frequently, out of whole logs rather than planks. I have a bone to pick with the child-friendly sea mine. But it provides a good set up for a dad joke, so I'll let it slide.

Zuko and Iroh: Of course the one time Zuko is allowed to be in a good place, it's so that he and Iroh both have farther to fall when the inevitable happens. Poor guy just can't catch a break. I'd be mad at Azula for the party crashing that I'm assuming she'll do next episode, but it's been established that Zuko has all nice things taken away from him as soon as he gets them, and I can't blame Azula for being a tool of the universe.

Azula & Long Feng: Azula's acting in Long Feng's prison cell was miles ahead of what Long Feng was doing in front of the Earth King, so I'm wondering if Long Feng has bitten off more than he can chew. Also: conspiring with the enemy to bring down your own city just so you can reinstall yourself as the power behind the throne that will presumably cease to exist as soon as the Fire Nation takes control? That is both treasonous beyond description and an incredible case of shooting yourself in the foot. What's Long Feng's plan here?

Toph and the Dunderheads: it says something about the consistency of Toph's characterisation from her introduction onwards that she breaks the universe this episode and my reaction was "that's neat." It's obviously a huge moment, but of course Toph can do that. Toph can do anything. More importantly, Toph knows that Toph can do anything, so Toph routinely does do anything, especially things she shouldn't be able to do. If you had asked me a few episodes back which character would be most likely to fundamentally redefine bending, I would have said Toph, since she's already fundamentally redefined bending with her earth sense sonar vision.

Also Toph just breaks stuff. Things that come into contact with her cease to function as intended and instead function as Toph requires. Look at the two idiots: both successful business owners, one also a successful hoodwinker of the richest family around. But they come into contact with Toph and their brains take an extended vacation.

Katara & the Generals: this plot was more like an extension of Azula's plot than its own standalone thing. You can't blame her for spilling the news about Zuko and Iroh to someone she honestly thought was Suki. Not much else to say about it, although it's cute that she asks for a table for two at the tea shop. Momo gets a chair!

I like that there's a theme this episode of things going wrong despite the best intentions. No one's acting maliciously here apart from the Antagonists. The Earth King is having an honest chat with people he thought were friends. Sokka vouched for people he honestly thought were the Kyoshi Warriors. Katara shares information about a presumed threat with people she honestly thought were her allies. You can quibble with the wisdom of some of these decisions, but there were all done with good intentions. The best laid plans of mice and men oft go awry and all that. It brings to mind that Star Trek quote about how you can do everything right and still lose. And this set up is going to hit harder when whatever goes wrong next episode happens. And something will go wrong. A few months ago I figured that the Season 2 finale would be a triumph, but all signs are pointing towards a tragedy instead.

This episode was visually stunning, the soundtrack in the Air Temple sections especially was very evocative, and I applaud the minds that could juggle that many plot threads at once without dropping any. This one is definitely going on my rewatch list.

#atla #avatar: the last airbender #avatar the last airbender #the guru

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seikkoi · 9 months

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ᴅᴇᴠᴏᴛɪᴏɴ. | tony stark x f!reader

18+ minors dni

tw: nsfw, mild dubcon elements, rough sex, drunk sex, degradation, edging, choking, bruising, possessive behavior

word count: 3,108

pairing: tony x female reader

part two | part three

“No, what?” His hand around your throat isn’t tight enough for you to not respond, and you know what he’s asking for regardless. “No, sir, I’m sorry.” Tony’s hand tightens once the words leave you, eliciting a gasp from your lips. You hear him suck in a breath at the words, his face so dangerously close to yours. “I expect your devotion. That doesn’t end when you leave this office, am I understood?”

The music and lights almost seem more intoxicating than the alcohol swirling in your glass. The clear liquid has all the physical attributes of water, with none of the hydrating effects, leaving your throat dry as you laugh at whoever’s throwing jokes at you. You can’t tell if the guy’s actually funny or if you’ve just had that much to drink.

At this point, neither matters. You’re seated at the bar for some event your boss, Tony Stark, dragged you along to that turned into a raving afterparty. It honestly started quite tame, with speeches and awards, but now it was a few steps away from a club. It’s still not too wild, the venue large enough for you to sit comfortably on the leather barstool without anyone feeling the need to push past you. You’d dressed under the expectation of sitting through hours of boredom, a long black dress too tight and heels too high for standing amongst the growing crowd.

Had it been any worse, you would have already found Tony to make a swift exit. Instead, he ends up being the one to find you . Only a few hours had passed, yet you managed to cross the bridge over from tipsy to drunk. Drunk enough to not care that the world-class comedian you’ve been entertaining has his hand on your thigh.

Or to notice the look on Tony’s face as he makes his way towards you. You’re laughing while your glass comes back to your lip, noticing Tony only when he speaks, suddenly next to you.

“Dying to know what’s so funny here.” There’s nothing casual in his voice, stern with eyes trained on the man beside you.

The stranger's hand on your thigh is brought to your attention at the feeling of its departure. You can’t quite make out Tony’s expression, but you know it isn't good. Tony’s hand rests in his suit pockets, with relaxed shoulders not matching the sternness in his voice. It’s enough to unease the touchy stranger who clears his throat, glancing a last look at you before turning away.

It’s then that Tony turns back to you, and you immediately want to go back to 5 seconds ago when he wouldn’t spare you a glance. His eyes are dark, angry staring into you.

“How much have you had to drink?” His tone is the same one he gave the stranger, making you recoil even more. Especially since you don’t have an accurate answer.

“Only a few.” You chuckle, an attempt to diffuse tension and a product of the alcohol. “Why, is there a problem, sir?”

Tony takes the now-empty drink from your hand, setting it on the counter. As you start to protest, his hand is already in yours, pulling you from the bar.

You can’t get much of a word out, between the thumping music and speed in Tony’s stride. Before you know it, the noise is behind you as you exit the doors into the cool night air. Tony’s hand remains in yours until you grace the sidewalk. His hands dive into suit pockets, presumably looking for his phone to call Happy.

The air is slightly sobering, making you aware of the fact that what just happened was completely out of left field. But you're too drunk to figure out a reason. You’d worked at Stark Industries as their CFO for long enough to regard Tony as more than a simple coworker. You were still his employee, eager to help him in any way possible. A good day at work was any day that you actually felt useful to him. He had a habit of not delegating enough, and you had to make it clear more than once that you were there for him, to make his life easier. There may have been a playful gesture here or there, but you knew enough of his personality to know he was that way with everyone . You knew enough about how he saw you to know he had no right to be upset at the idea of you letting your hair down. More than that, you’d always tried to be respectful to him. Despite his insistence that his first name was fine, you couldn’t suppress the need to show respect by calling him Mr. Stark or sir.

A word doesn’t pass between the two of you- not during the brief wait for Happy or the ride back. Tony spends the entire journey either on his phone or staring out the window. He doesn’t explain nor spare another look your way. The longer he ignored you, the worse you felt. Even though you had no idea what you were guilty of.

The ride does little for sobering you up, stepping out in front of the tower still dazed. You walk in with him, his focus still on that stupid phone. You give an eyeroll that he doesn’t notice, walking into the elevator. You’re starting to think this sudden episode had nothing to do with you all. Maybe there was a work emergency?

At the soft close of the elevator doors, Tony stands beside you, fingers typing away. You can feel irritation rising. You've been waiting for an explanation that he was taking too long to give.

“I’ve never known you to be one to leave a party early, sir.” You lean back against the wall, listening to the quiet hum.

He doesn’t respond or even move his head. It was probably the drink's fault, but the silent treatment act now really began to annoy you.

“Care to give me any explanation for you dragging me out of there like a child?” The words are harsher now, hopefully showing how fed up you were becoming.

“You were acting like one.” He speaks without moving, with a low tone and his own annoyance.

“Excuse me?” You push yourself off the wall to stand next to him again.

His eyes still don’t move from that stupid cell phone, and doesn't he grant you a response.

“Forgive me for forgetting about work for one night and having a few drinks.”, you scoff, voice raising.

“A few is an understatement.” His volume stays the same, but you can tell it’s taking all of his strength not to shout back. That’s not what flips you to anger, it’s his audacity.

“Who the hell are you to be counting my drinks? I’m my own person outside of working for yo-” You’re cut off by him suddenly pocketing his phone, turning, and stepping towards you. You step backward towards the wall, expecting him to leave some distance between you two. He doesn’t, forcing you the short distance back to the elevator wall until you two are only about a foot apart.

It’s then that he grants you a look, and just like before at the venue, you want to go back to before you saw the anger in his eyes.

“And who the hell are you to act like that?” His gaze is unbreaking and ice-cold, only inches away from your face. It extinguishes any fire you had built up towards him for his attitude.

“Act like what?” It’s a genuine question- the shameful guilt you had earlier in the car returning. You can’t look away from him, despite how badly you want to push him aside and call him crazy.

“That guy at the bar had his hand halfway up your dress and you were too drunk to even fucking notice.” It's harsh but a hint of concern breaks through.

Caught off guard, you don’t have a response for that, let alone any explanation. You stay quiet under this gaze.

“You should be thanking me. That venue was packed. Do you know what could have happened to you if I didn’t notice?”

You stutter for a second, stuttering on words that don’t take for. You felt genuinely terrible now- between the fact that Tony had to be concerned for your safety, and the fact that you got that drunk. It hadn’t felt like a lot at the moment, but it definitely did later on. Even now, there’s that familiar swimming feeling hanging out the back of your brain. To make matters worse, you fully snapped at Tony about it, your boss.

“I’m sorry,” you say quietly, body softening.

To your surprise, Tony closes what little distance remained between you two, bringing his face close to you. He braces an arm above you on the wall, almost to make sure you don’t think about moving.

“The way you just went off about it? No, I don’t think so. Is that your idea of having fun? Getting shit-faced and letting anyone do what they want to you?” His words feel like acid, bitter and burning. Tears start to sting in the corners of your eyes. There’s no concern this time- just disappointment and rage. You almost think it’d be better if he simply yelled.

“I don’t-”

“You like it, don’t you? Having men touch you wherever they want?” He keeps his eyes trained on yours, meaning every word. As he speaks, the elevator dings, signaling that you've reached the offices.

The boldness of his words leaves you speechless, shocked at his accusation.

“No, Mr. Stark, that’s not the case I just-” You can’t handle the look he’s giving you any longer, tears about to fall. You turn your head down when you speak, eyes fixated on your heels.

“You just what ?” With his free hand, he roughly grasps the side of your face, placing his thumb under your chin and fingers through your hair to force your gaze upward. “You’re just that stupid?”

“No, no, I just had too many, I’m sorry,” Words pour out like a quiet stream. Tony’s forceful hand on your face ignited something else besides guilt or fear. Maybe it was the alcohol, but you wanted his forgiveness more than anything- for him to not see you this way. Behind Tony, the elevator closes as he keeps you against the wall. You didn’t dream of moving, anyway.

“Do you think it’s acceptable to act like that when you’re with me? Do you think I want to see other men put their hands on you?”

“No,” you say softly, letting your eyes close.

His hand shifts, moving his fingers and thumb to your throat with just enough pressure to make you open your eyes in surprise. You wish only then that you were sober because maybe you’d be more scared instead of worked up.

“No, what?”

His hand around your throat isn’t tight enough for you to not respond, and you know what he’s asking for regardless.

“No, sir, I’m sorry.”

Tony’s hand tightens once the words leave you, eliciting a gasp from your lips. You hear him suck in a breath at the words, his face so dangerously close to yours.

“I expect your devotion . That doesn’t end when you leave this office, am I understood?” He draws out devotion like it’s not a request. The pressure on your throat, the guilt, the embarrassment, and the arousal you’re trying to ignore all come to head, forcing a tear down your cheek.

You can’t answer, as he allows too few breaths, and small gasps continue to fall from your lips. Your mind is in a million places. You want to push him off, beg for his forgiveness and cross those last few inches of distance so you could kiss him- all in the same moment. You manage to move your head slightly up and down, conveying your answer.

“I don’t think you do.” He leans forward, pressing his body against yours. You can feel his slow, heavy breaths against your gasping lips. It feels like electricity, sending goosebumps across your body.

Before you know it, your lungs refill with air as Tony drops his hands to your waist, turning you and pushing you against the wall. It’s a sudden movement, having to extend your arms to keep from hitting your head. You attempt to straighten and turn back before Tony’s hand is pushing you into the wall. He presses into you, his body weight stopping any more attempts to move. You feel the hard member constrained by his soft suit pants against your back, pinned.

In the next second, you hear the clink of metal from Tony’s belt. You try to move again, fear working its way back up. Tony’s quick to push you fully against the wall, leaving your arms at your sides. The thud of his belt hitting the floor reverberates off the elevator walls.

“This is what you need, isn’t it?” Tony growls while his rough hands pull your dress above your waist. He runs calloused palms over your ass, with harsh squeezes that you’re sure will leave a bruise.

“This is what you need me to do to you?”, he doesn’t bother with your panties, tearing them and letting the ruined garment fall to the floor. Another tear flows down your cheek- whether it's from pleasure or pain, you don’t know.

You don’t resist as he pulls your arms behind your back, holding your wrists in one hand. With the other, Tony gently runs his fingers across your now exposed folds, contrasting his earlier behavior. The soft touch when you were already so worked up pulls a quiet moan from your lips. He continues his motions, touching you slowly and steadily but purposely avoiding where you needed him most. You almost hate yourself for how good he felt, how wet you were before he even touched you. The sweetness of his fingers while simultaneously keeping you pinned to the wall made you want to piss him off all over again if it meant touching you like this.

“Look how easy it is to get you like this,” He pushes two fingers into your soaking entrance, the sudden presence causing you to writhe against his restraint. He’s quick to tighten his hold, adding two more soon-to-be bruises to your wrists. The roughness returns, as he roughly pushes his fingers to your depths, only to withdraw and repeat with the same vigor. The warmth in your core is quickly built up, only making a bigger mess on his hand.

“You just need to be used, huh?” Tony removes his fingers, an aching emptiness that he doesn’t leave you with for long. You’re mind is fixated on the pleasure, gasping against the wall as you feel the tip of his cock at your entrance. Reacting to the unexpected pressure, you try to move away again in vain. Tony’s grip keeps you in place as he sinks his cock into you without warning.

A long groan escapes Tony as he bottoms out, with his free hand holding your hip in a vice grip. He wastes no time, pulling the length of his cock before slamming it back into you again. The force leaves your mouth agape, eyes shut in a new mixture of pleasure and pain. With every rough thrust into your cunt, you cry out once he reaches your limit. He drives you into the wall with force, more of his low moans filling the air. The sound of Tony’s hips crashing into you and the wetness between you two echoes in the elevator. The fabric of his suit pants is a painful friction, making your skin feel raw. There’s nothing sweet or caring in the way he takes you- it’s clear that it’s a reminder to never fuck up like this again.

“Do you understand now?” His violent thrusts continue, voice wavering from his own ecstasy of how good you were taking his cock. “You are mine and mine alone .”

“Y-yes, I understan-” , you managed to choke out.

You cry out again, a broken string of pleas and moans as he picks up his pace. Your wrists strain against the force, deepening the bruises. The aching pressure built up in your core is already becoming too much when Tony drops the hand at your wrists to reach between your legs.

Tony's fingers muse over your clit, rubbing in hard, wide circles with his thumb. His cock continues to fill every inch of your walls, fucking you with newfound vigor. You reach a hand back, aiming to slow his hips to give you any kind of respite. Instead, you find yourself simply grabbing the fabric at his waist, having no effect on his pace. The added sensation on your clit nearly sends you over again, shuddering at his touch.

“God, Tony,” , you plea. Your head starts to spin, the knot in your stomach on overdrive. “Fuck, I’m going t-” A long, shaky moan leaves you, legs turning to liquid.

Tony slows at your admission, an act that almost pulls another tear from you as you were so, so close.

“Not yet.” The cold tone he uses does very little to help.

Tony can’t resist you for long, however. Before long, he turns from rough and unyielding to slow and passionate. Hard thrusts turn into deep, careful strokes. The hand between your legs dances teasingly along slick folds. You hear his groans increase, intercut with soft praises and sighs of your name. It all tilts along the thin line of too much and not enough.

You think you might pass out when he grabs the palm you’ve been holding at his waist, drawing soft circles over your hand while he earns another tear from you. You felt insanely desperate, lacking the focus to plead with him to just give you what you need. There was little you wouldn’t do for it at this point. If devotion was what he wanted, this was an effective way of getting it.

“Please, I can’t-” your cry is quickly interrupted, with Tony at the end of his own pleasure snapping his hips back into your cunt and flicking his fingers over your long-neglected clit.

It doesn’t take long, your body yearning for release for what felt like days. Tony brings his head to your ear, muttering about how good you were for him and how much you were his. That ends up being the final straw- your body tenses and shakes around his cock, with sobbing gasps as Tony curses and continues to thrust into you. He’s not long behind you, burying himself inside of you with a final rough push.

Slow, shaky breaths from you both emerge until he withdraws, pulling your dress back down. When you turn, he’s already putting his belt back on, staring at you with a lustful look in his eyes as if he didn’t already fuck you. You’re silent, rubbing one hand across a sore throat.

Tony steps towards you, cupping a hand under your face before giving you a long, passionate kiss that has you aching again. When he finally pulls away, your lips are swollen.

“Glad to see you understand."

#tony stark #tony stark x reader #tw dubious consent #tw dubcon #mcu fanfiction #avengers fanfiction #tony stark fanfiction #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x you #smut #tony stark smut #dark tony stark #seikkoiwrites

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4pfsukuna · 3 months

Text

jealous!sukuna story here👇🏾

kings-get-jealous-to

Akward

The last thing Nanami kento expected to see at Gojo’s party (that he basically tricked him into going to) was his ex girl from 4 years ago in a black mini silk dress that if you just bent over a tad bit more—

“You alright man?” Gojo ask slapping his blonde hair friends back snapping him back to the reality where his cup of alcohol had been crushed completely in his hand.

He was sure of Two things in this moment.

His hand was wet and 2? He wasnt letting you get away again.

———

Incubus curse

After the mission Gojo sent you and Namami on to get rid of some incubus curse (which he didnt mention) Nanami is shocked when you dont show up to the school the next day and decides to pay you a visit.

“I want you to bend me over every surface including my balcony until neither of us have any energy left… and then go for one more round”

Part two

What if Nanami is the one who suffers the effects of the incubus curse instead of you?

He felt fine and whatever silly little pink dust the cursed spirit sprayed mustve been just that, that’s until he catches a glimpse of you pinning one of the students to the ground and damn would he work endless amounts of overtime to be under you like that— what was he saying?! Shaking his head he almost completely looses it when he watches the way your ass jiggles in your shorts and wonders how back shots would be.

Its not long before hes back in his office gripping his length in his fist and bottom lip between his teeth to quiet his moans.

“Nanami you shouldve said something”

“Like what? How i want to have you moaning and beging to cum for a fifth time with tears in your eyes? Or that i want to watch your eyes get wide as you swallow my dick taking it to the back of your throat like the good girl i know you are? Or that i want to fill you up with every drop of my seed to put my claim on you and my self control is dwindling because i can smell your arousal and i just want to burry my face in it” he says with pure raw desire as his eyes burn into mine.

——

Professor reward & punishment.

You suck at college math and luckily your neighbor who happens to be a proffessor offers to tutor you after you helped him out a few nights ago.

“Since you can’t seem to pay attention, for every answer you get right ill put in another finger and for every wrong answer you put clothes on reducing the friction.” He holds my jaw making sure im listening.

“And extra credit” i tease before he begins rolling his sleeves up the bulge of his muscles ans loosening his tie yanking aggresively.

A dark smirk reaches his lips that ive never seen before and ive never wanted to be more accurate in… whatever subject we were studying for again.

————

Jealous!Sukuna

You and sukuna had gone back and forth so much its almost like you forgot yuji was his vessel, almost like you forgot he was the king of curses.

But none of that mattered now you (23) and yuji also of age had comitted to getting drunk and letting loose for once.

Sukuna pays it no mind as you aimlessly flirt with some guy at the bar but your eyes are on him. Not the guy, not yuji but Sukuna who had taken over since yuji was to drunk to fight back.

He could easily burn the world to the ground and nothing could stop him except for the look in your eyes when your tounge trails up his abs to his chest tracing his tattoo that the only fire burning hes worried about is the one in your eyes.

“Id pleasure you in ways no woman in your 1000 years of existance could even think about” i smirk before flipping us over so im on top us still connected by our hips moving my hand from his wrist to his neck making him purr.

——

Dad!Sukuna

More of a drabble aka the 3 times his kids call him daddy and the one time you do.

“Get in the cage!”

“Sukuna stop telling them that! Theres no cage”

“He put fucking smiley faces in my book of incantations” he growls showing me the smiley faces with red eyes, fangs and a crooked smile.

“Oooh he drew you is that why youre mad” i tease watching him seathe as the sound of footsteps running upstairs can be heard smoke nearly comes out of his ears and foam from his mouth.

“As shitty as the smiley face may be he drew it because of you, now stop being such a sourpuss! if you be nice ill even call you daddy and let you give me another little you” i peck his lips listening to the growl of disappointment from pulling away too fast.

“I don’t think i told them how much i love them today” He mumbles pulling me into his lap.

#jjk x black!reader #choso x black!reader #jjk smut #nanami x reader #nanami x y/n #nanami x oc #nanami x black reader #sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #sukuna x oc #sukuna x y/n #sukuna x black reader

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ineffable-endearments · 1 month

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The Crow Road and Good Omens: Further-Out Thoughts

Here are a few more thoughts; they're more interpretive yet than the ones in my original post about The Crow Road.

I see some similarities between Prentice and both Aziraphale and Crowley.

Prentice feels this need to believe there's something beyond this life, in large part because this life can be ended so quickly and so easily, and it isn't fair. Throughout the novel, he is never very interested in organized religion; his interest in spirituality is truly about the feeling that there has to be a deeper meaning to existence than this one life.

Likewise, I tend to interpret Aziraphale as willing to consider that the people who make up his institution are fallible, but still stuck on the idea that Heaven is performing an essential role: someone should be up there Doing Good, or, more accurately, encouraging people to Do Good. He has reservations about the existing spiritual establishment and how reflective of truth it is, but he still has this feeling that there has to be a greater power and a greater meaning that can be given to people, himself included, because otherwise, what would be the point?

Then again, there is a nonzero amount of Crowley in Prentice, too (and I know the point is that everyone has a little of each). Prentice is a college-aged young man trying to figure himself out in a world that can be profoundly unfair, and he wants to be allowed to experiment with the idea of life after death. Considering perspectives different from one's parents is part of growing up, after all. Kenneth is determined to steer his sons toward a specific worldview, and as much as Kenneth's perspective on spirituality is supported by the narrative, his stubbornness is also ultimately the thing that gets him killed. Prentice observes his mother's hands-off approach to ideology may have ultimately been more effective.

Doesn't this sound a little familiar? Prentice wants to be allowed to question, and he isn't willing to just shrug and accept unfairness without an argument. When he can't find satisfactory answers, he also tends to drown his anxiety and depression in alcohol and other substances.

All in all, I feel we may have seen the conflict between Crowley and Aziraphale playing out in Prentice's character development; they are the angel and demon on his shoulder, as usual. But the conflict was resolved in the way that I think and hope Crowley and Aziraphale's will be on a grander scale. Prentice ended up having to surrender his philosophy, especially the life-after-death stuff, but then his deep need for a sense of meaning was satisfied much better by finding that meaning here on Earth.

There's also an interesting interaction between the two stories in relation to the afterlife. Namely, The Crow Road takes place in a universe that presumably works just like ours, while we know for sure that in Good Omens, there is an afterlife of one kind or another. We can't be sure how it works, but we've seen human characters in both Season 1 and Season 2 maintain their consciousness after death. I wonder if maybe in the world of Good Omens, human mortality is somehow being exploited by the higher-ups?

Anyway, as a result of this difference, Good Omens also has a special opportunity with the "death doesn't give life meaning - life gives itself meaning!" message. Its main characters are immortal. The book already subverts the whole "oh, being immortal sucks, everyone eventually wants to die" trope by portraying Crowley and Aziraphale's motivation to maintain their Earthly lives instead of starting Armageddon. Season 2 added depth to that, and Season 3 has an opportunity to fully flesh out why exactly life on Earth is where meaning is created even when there is no time limit, even if people don't have the inevitability of death looming over their heads.

Another thought: something a little ironic in The Crow Road is that the incident that led to Kenneth's death "should," theoretically, have made Prentice believe in higher powers, if it was really about that. It certainly convinced Hamish. However, the whole conflict between himself and his father was more about the meaning Prentice sought, so instead, it pushed Prentice toward Kenneth's ideology.

I am wondering if this points toward an event that Aziraphale "should," theoretically, take to mean that Heaven is right or all-powerful or otherwise can't possibly be defied, but which will be the very thing that convinces him the entire system is wrong.

Finally, @loverdosis brought up the great point that memory and history are also major conceptual themes in The Crow Road. In The Crow Road, memory and history give the characters their sense of identity. Prentice also mentions it as one way people can achieve a kind of continuity that doesn't infringe on the importance of life itself. And all of that meshes with Good Omens. So far, Gabriel's plot has involved a very strong focus on memory issues, and through that, we've seen that there is something going on with Crowley's memory as well, although exactly what it is - how much of his memory is missing, who took it, whether he can or wants to get it back - is uncertain. Beelzebub described Gabriel's memories as "All your...you," implying that memories are the majority of what gives Gabriel his identity. The memory wipe punishment is very much a death sentence.

After consideration, I would not be surprised to see memory make a roaring comeback as a theme in Season 3. It could even bring themes of identity and purpose with it.

#good omens #the crow road #go3 speculation #s3 speculation #go 2 spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #go s2 spoilers #good omens book club

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mortalityplays · 6 months

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these people are never going to forgive us. and we don't deserve to be forgiven after this

I've been trying to think what the narrative of this new century will be like, for future generations. I feel like the 20th century had a fairly clear arc of cause and effect, almost like a story you could tell, and I was imagining the 21st would just have "chaos all the time as the planet boils until we die" as its headline. But I feel like I'm seeing the arc of the 21st being written and it's a lot more bleak than I ever imagined.

I understand what you mean. I suspect every generation feels like this, thrust into conflicts we were supposed to have outgrown and too small to affect the scale of change we feel gestating in our chests. My grandparents grew up in WW2 and expected that to be the last true era of atrocity they would have to fit into their mental landscape. They didn't cope well with the bitter complexity of the politics they inherited as adults. My parents lived through the tail end of the cold war, and my mum has told me often about the senseless nihilism they felt, even as they chained themselves to fences outside nuclear bases and smuggled news back and forth to friends behind the iron curtain. Everything could be snuffed out any day and it didn't matter. As a kid I was dimly aware of ethnic cleansings in Rwanda and then Kosovo, and I was 11 when I watched planes hit the world trade centre. I spent my teens protesting the Iraq war — around the world it's estimated there were around 36 million of us — and I watched all those efforts come to nothing at all.

The good news (I promise this is good news, in a sense, for the moment we're living through) is that narratives in history are an illusion. 'History is written by the winners' is trite, but it’s somewhat true. It might be more accurate to say history is written by the survivors. For as long as we survive, I think the most important role many of us can play is as witnesses. When we look at the 20th century in retrospect, we naturally hunt for lines of cause and effect that can explain the multivarious stories that survived to reach us. Those explanations are how we exercise agency over situations we couldn't change, and how we express the aspirations we're left with. And despite the way it looks after we've settled on our own retrospective storylines, they are never static or unchallenged. We are forever workshopping the moral of our own stories.

My point is, the present is the sharpest edge of history. It hurts, it sucks, and I don't think it has ever made sense. Making sense isn't something history does by itself, it's something we do to it. So if there is anything at all that we can do as petty nobodies far away from today's conflict, it's pay attention. Listen, watch, record, remember, and be active and loud in the process of deciding what each new fucked up day means. It's not enough, but it's not nothing either. I'm sorry it's like this.

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kusokurae01 · 24 days

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y’know, I somewhat recall you saying you had your own J&H adaptation, Any fun facts about it itself or J&H? (You give me asks I’ll give you one right back)

Hello, although I only have the 0,1% completed which is like, a summary of eight/nine months of work, I am still very excited to share my little alternative universe; it takes inspiration from many other adaptations, mainly the musical and The Glass Scientists. A lot of things are placeholders for something bigger and completely original, and it's supposed to blend with actual history, meaning that in some way it is historically accurate at some extent, considering I am making extensive researches about the Victorian Era and how it works, with the help of books and articles online. It's quite hard to make it 100% accurate of course, but most Jekyll and Hyde adaptations tend to ignore the fact that this is set in a very specific period of time, and they also tend to focus more on which character sucks the most dicks rather than the original message(s) of the novella. I don't like stories which solely focus on the characters being queer and that's clear, and while LGBTQ+ is included in Apotheosis, that doesn't mean that its the main focus; sure, it is talked about, but it's a part of the story and not the main story. I'm not saying that there should be a correct way of writing adaptations, but rather, that the world should feel alive and dynamic. It is important to establish worldbuilding, and make it a present part of the story, because it SHAPES the characters. I think that whilst you do not need a degree in history to write about J&H or the victorian era, it's important to know at least the basics of how the society worked, the advancements and how they affected society, etc.

Now, the victorian era is quite interesting when it comes to progress. In 1879 the first psychology laboratory was established in Germany, and many other advances in medicine were made, there were the first feminist movements, the two industrial revolutions (second in 1870-1914), what I'm trying to say is that the 19th century is a very important period of our time, at least for eurocentric history, and it's so curious to think how some of these inventions are just two centuries old. Not to mention that by 1888, the Bloody Code (which was how the severe law system of England was called, which focused on social punishment rather than rehabilitation, and the death penalty was very common even for lesser crimes by public execution) had been largely replaced and the death penalty wasn't in use anymore. The world was changing and advancing, and what does that mean for the most conservative classes, especially those who were in high favor to such horrible practices, especially when towards the lower and most despised classes? What does it mean for the poor and ostracized, especially considering the precarious conditions of orphanages, poorhouses and such? Fun fact: this was one of the battles the Crown itself, or rather, Queen Victoria, as a woman and mother, advocated for this, especially when most of its components were children, which were there for various reasons. And what about the emerging middle classes, the so despised noveau nobillty?

Medicine was both revered and feared, because while advancements were made in medical science, many treatments were still primitive and often painful. Additionally, the lack of understanding about germs and proper sanitation led to high mortality rates in hospitals, contributing to a general fear and distrust of medical practices among the public; not to mention that writers were starting to talk about the dangers of medicine (ex. Frankenstein), not to mention that there was the Royal Society that, while it promoted scientific inquiry, knowledge and collaboration, it certainly would've found itself debating about the inclusion of rogue science as effectively, a science.

It is important to know the rest of the hystorical context in which Apotheosis finds itself in, which is that of a very important migration of citizens from Ireland to London (including jews who were fleeing from the pogroms, popular riots against religious minorities which were happening in the Russian Empire), and all of them gathered in the East End of London, where Whitechapel was. It didn't take long for overpopulation (which was already a recurring issue in London) to happen, and for Whitechapel to be redeemed a generally unsafe place like all the other slums, not to mention all the popular disorders and the increase of violent repression from the London Metropolitan Police (ex. Bloody Sunday, which caused at least two deaths, it was basically a manifestation in which the Social Democratic Federation advocated for the end of unemployment, better working conditions and a right to vote for all adult men, other than supporting the Irish National League against the oppression the british were putting them through); it's in this context, that from august-november of 1888, Jack the Ripper terrifies London; 16 are the suspected victims, 5 the ones which had been confirmed, but what if I told you that there is actually more to this tale, when people thought that the Ripper was still amongst them due to how ineffective the police system was at the time, and that some murders associated with him weren't actually the Ripper's doing?

General Lord Glossop, a member of the council which oversees the Royal Society, was found dead after attending the funeral of His Grace, the Bishop of Basingstoke. The body was found the next morning, January 1889; the method of killing appeared to be strangulation as confirmed by trained medical professionals. This was the second governor who happened to die under mysterious circumstances which, were associated with the Ripper itself, as the methods were basically the same. On December 1888, the body of an unidentified underage prostitute and the terribly mutilated corpse of His Grace, the Bishop of Basingstoke, were found in the streets of a London slum, following the same criteria of that which seemed to reflect that of Jack the Ripper.

A member of the Marchetti family, Miss. Maia Marchetti, requested an immediate revision of the autopsies to prove that the killer wasn't Jack The Ripper, but rather another unnamed man who yet had to be caught; she founded her thesis on the two, crucial facts that the murderer had only ever killed members of the aristocracy and one single prostitute for the sole fact that she could've potentially acted as a witness for the case, and there wasn't any fury exhibited towards her corpse, and Thomas Bond (profilier of Jack The Ripper) stated that the Ripper didn't have any anatomical knowledge, and the body appeared to have been mutilated with such a precision which could only belong to those with a great anatomical knowledge, possibly a doctor.

On another note, she had managed to gather ten prostitutes together, who worked in the same zones where the homicides happened, to declare in a written letter to Scotland Yard, that an unknown, violent and unpleasant man with an odd fascination with sadomasochism, had been with them. However, this request was denied, and the letter archieved, until the inspector on the case Scott Newcomen presented the same thesis, thus obtaining a revised autopsy report, this time conducted by Dr. Hastie Lanyon, who brought some interesting discoveries to the table. It is important to note to the case that, the two men had died because of a basilar skull fracture, while the prostitute seemed to truly have died because of strangulation, like it had already been ascertained.

Due to the sheer brutality of the murders and the fact that they involved members of the aristocracy, the media was following this case with great attention, and reporting on it extensively (and of course great pressure was put on the authorities to solve the crimes quickly). Considering that this man happened to principally target members of the upper classes who had a significant role in society, save if there were any eye-witnesses, speculations that these might be murders made for socio-politic reasons committed by a member of the lower classes, seeing the location and circumstances, caused heightened tensions between social classes.

Other members of the council, such as Lady Beaconsfield and Sir Archibald Proops, perished under the same circumstances. An interesting parallelism is that many unreliable letters were sent to Scotland Yard and to Central News Agency; some were written by well-intentioned citizens, providing information towards the capture of the killer; however, the majority of them were deemed useless and consequently ignored. Hundreds of letters were written by people claiming to be the killer, and although this letter wasn't redeemed important and considered a fake, and consequently scrapped, a letter had been signed with the name Edward Hyde. And that's how people started to identify the man. Another letter described the man as someone who had a rancid aura around him, with an area of deformity which couldn't be quite explained by any actual malformations; he had long, golden locks. And unfortunately, these were the only small details which also happened to have been confirmed in the first letters those ten prostitutes wrote. A first rough identi-kit and criminal profile was made by Dr. Hastie Lanyon.

The slayings were the handiwork of a solitary individual, a robust young man aged between eighteen and twenty-three, possessed of a brazen yet unflappable demeanor, bearing obscure physical anomalies difficult to discern. Though yet too youthful to grace the circles of high society, Edward Hyde presented himself in attire befitting a gentleman of esteem, maintaining habitual visits to dens of iniquity, whilst displaying a remarkable acumen in matters anatomical, suggestive of a scholarly pursuit, perhaps that of the medical sciences.

The fact that it was clearly a member of the aristocracy seemingly fell deaf to the ears of the media, which constantly sidetracked the police investigations, misleading them and accusing innocents of being Edward Hyde and fabricating evidence with the excuse of pursuing justice, when in reality this just caused more social disadvantages and disorders which ended with popular uprisings; an interesting phenomenon to note, is that of many women sent romantic letters to those who were suspected to be Edward Hyde, and many visited the locations in which the murders happened in hopes of meeting the Prince of Disaster.

#.txt #the strange case of dr jekyll and mr hyde #jekyll and hyde

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riddle-me-grits · 2 years

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Stoker and PTSD (and the Irish Potato Famine)

I’ve seen some folks in the Dracula Daily tag expressing surprise that Jonathan’s symptoms of post-traumatic stress feel so accurate, and that they can’t believe this is coming from a 19th century novel, so I thought I’d offer up a little context.

Even though we usually locate the beginning of medical understandings of PTSD as WWI (with “shell-shock”), The Victorians definitely had some sense of what PTSD was and how it manifested, though they obviously wouldn't have called it that (references to it include names like "battle exhaustion," "soldier's fatigue," "hysterical attacks," “railway spine,” and others). In the 1880s, psychologists like Jean-Martin Charcot began to argue that trauma could induce “hysteria” for years afterwards (which, folks knew -- there’s references to PTSD in Shakespeare -- but this is when the medical establishment started to, well, medicalize it).

By the time Dracula was written, Freud the Creep™ had already set up his practice, and the "talking cure" as treatment for things like trauma was gaining momentum in Europe. Stoker was very interested in psychology and “hysteria,” and would have read works by Freud and Charcot. He also had family ties to the medical establishment -- his older brother, Thornley, was an anatomist and surgeon in the Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland.

There’s good historical context for all this in Andrés Romero Jódar’s article “Bram Stoker’s Dracula. A Study on the Human Mind and Paranoid Behaviour” (x), which is thankfully online and not behind a paywall, hooray!

There’s also then the matter of how much Stoker’s understanding of trauma/ptsd was personal or something he bore witness to. He spent a portion of his childhood bedridden with a mysterious illness (and his treatment, according to a great-nephew, may have included blood-letting, which... okay, apocryphal but interesting).

He was also born during the Irish Potato Famine, which remains a critical case study in considerations of mass social and physical trauma, survivor’s guilt, and epigenetics (roughly, the idea that something like severe trauma can have an effect on the genetics of one’s children; that trauma can be literally generational).

The Stokers, like everyone in Ireland, were affected by the famine and, if nothing else, it’s possible that witnessing the aftereffects of a mass cultural trauma like that might have deepened Stoker’s understanding of PTSD as a phenomenon or triggered his interest in the subject. Further, the particular kinds of trauma that occurred in Ireland during that event (people starving to the point of resembling the undead, people being accidentally buried alive, people being sucked dry by predatory aristocrats, the belief that cholera arrived borne upon sinister mists) are not incidental in a discussion of Dracula and its conception.

There’s a tidy little summary of connections between the Famine and Dracula here.

#sorry this blog has been so much a dracula discourse blog as of late #I haven't gotten to teach Victorian lit in a minute and my phd hat is tingling #long post #dracula daily #bram stoker #tw: starvation #tw: blood #tw: ptsd #tw: famine #tw: freud

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kafus · 3 months

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i'm thinking about this image i drew ages ago (like in 2021 or something. the art is so old. help) and how much it frustrates me. i think i really missed the mark on what i was trying to convey

i still agree with the intention behind this art, like i was trying to convey that DID is not eternal torment with evil alters trying to possess you and make your life a living hell as is often stereotypically thought, and actually i have supportive and loving alter experiences, in my case literally being in a romantic relationship with an alter.

but the way that i framed it was as a dichotomy where only one or the other is true. this was partially for the comedic effect of the sharp contrast and like... its ability to be easily consumed on social media (something i unfortunately cared a lot more about back then) REALLY influenced this image's presentation. but that's just not accurate and i didn't view it as two direct opposing sides at the time either, despite my flawed art.

DID is a fucking nightmare sometimes where my alters hurt me (there is nuance to this, even persecutors are trying to protect themselves or simply repeating what they've learned from trauma, but i digress) or i feel like i'm being possessed. sometimes "what people think DID is like" is how DID is, without any overtly magical elements of course, and the real issue is that people ONLY see DID that way and cannot see DID as a wide range of experiences from positive to negative.

really i just want people to see me as a whole person and accept that i have a really fucked up disorder stemming from childhood trauma which is bound to suck sometimes but also that i am still a person who experiences the full range of human emotion, including love and joy, and surprise surprise sometimes that is represented through my DID experiences too, which affects and ties into my entire life and identity.

this post is kind of messy, i'm just stream of consciousness-ing this shit, but tbh i'm just really irritated with the ye olde social media-ifying of my DID art and the oversimplification of my actual thoughts on the subject. i'm glad i've been moving away from that

#kiki was here #kiki.txt #to clarify this is not a self hating post or something #i appreciate my old art and my old thoughts #im just reflecting on how i would change this art now

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ojbrush · 4 months

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I dont have motivation to draw but you know what i do have? Ranting about OJ headcanons!

Hi gang i lobe OJ inanimate insanity and here are some in depth headcanons i have and imade sure to research alot about certain things but if i get asnything wrong that is on me and i aspologise OKAY!!!! GIGGLE OJ has Dyscalculia, BPD, and is autistic :3 Dyscalculia is a math learning disability that impairs an individual's ability to learn number-related concepts, perform accurate math calculations, reason and problem solve and preform OTHER!! basic math skills!!! >_< this is just a silly headcanon that may just be projection because i miighhtt have this myself!?!?! but not too sure maybe i just suck at math. WITH AUTISM . this guy does not get social cues, does NOT enjoy change. it makes him anxious, as shown a few times iirc. He gets obsessed with stuff and really never truly stops. Probably one reason why he works so much is because he gets so obsessed with working with stuff that he just doesnt stopo !!! He's also insanely impulsive. although he is a little mature he mainly doesnt think before he speaks, plus he gets very angry over the littlest of things which brings inn!!! BPD!!!! THIS GUY.. as shown in the show multiple times, he has terrible abandonment issues and tries so hard to make sure NOBODY leaves him again. the thought absolutely terrifies him. Despite getting so insanely angry over things (a recent example is when he and paintbrush fought in season 3 episode 4) and having awful and shaky relationships with others.. which causes people to leave him / abandon him. He also has impulsive and risky behaviours (which also ties into his autism traits) such as ALSO ruining okay relationships because of sometjing he thought of someone, thinking they are bad and will hurt him.

(Plus, even better, the hotel OJ canonically has had a casino OJ created!! which could also tie into the impulsive and risky behaviors with gambling!!) what ties with the fact he has intense anger, is also shown with the amount of times hes actually HAD a fight with someone in the show. let it be Bomb, Paintbrush, Paper. Sometimes it can get quite physical!!!

Which also brings us with Taco, since shes a whole thing with this guy. Despite him not being directly effected by her, She still tried to steal HIS prize!! He didnt like that. He got angry with that. he didnt truly show it, but we can tell he did. since everytime Taco is mentioned within his vicinity he gets pretty angry. This could tie with this symptom of bpd since he did, slightly like Taco before it all. Although thinking she was a little stupid, and useless. But this believing Taco is cruel, or doesnt care at all, has lasted over 12 years. So its more of a longtime thing. Which is also something with bpd, having a long time, long lasting hatred, angry, or just a strong emotion about something or someone. or nothing at all!!

Oh and by the way, this guy has a HORRIBLE time keeping good relationships, they usually end because of something he thought of someone. Such as Bombs "betrayal" in season 1, and he thought Bomb was horrible and hated him for a time. Or trying to dump Paper because of how he thought he was going to leave him. OJ has abandonment issues, and with this, gets angry at others for trying to leave him and abandon him, when they really aren't. Or he believes they are cruel and they do not give a shit about him or anyone's well being and tries to just. not associate with them, but he does eventually get them back. Well, sometimes atleast!!! also, to add onto Autistic traits HE GETS ANXIOUS AND UNEASY AROUND FIGHTS WITH OTHER PEOPLE / YELLING / LOUD NOISES !! as seen with the scene where EVERYONE is fighting in episode 1 season 3!!!

And although it could be because hes glass and easily broken, he gets scared when someone raised their voice at him, and looks as if they are going to attack him. But he also gets angry, and starts to fight back. maybe as a defense mechanism but whoo knows! (Note; this one may just be a headcanon, nothing in the show really suggests this but it is also pretty likely he WOULD do this!! he does have a history of snapping back at others and arguing with them if he feels threatened) also i would like to mention his constant state of worry about not being able to work. When he went to season 3 because he was invited, it is implied he rarely ever takes vacations / breaks from working. he says "I'm not too sure im on board with this vacay...--vacayggayu. AUGHj." (he doesnt even know how to say the word!) this could tie into obsessive behaviours?!?!? and if we think about it, it causes him excessive stress and worry. Anxiety about leaving the hotel to a different caretaker while hes on his break. Which he BARELY ever takes, mind you. Autism, and bpd symptoms in themself. He also has a lack of fear, but when something becomes too overwhelming he may overreact and have more fear than usual / expected of him. So yeah!!! little OJ thing, this is just because im insane about this guy. uhhh somethings may be inaccurate but hey, im just having fun and making reallyyy in-depth headcanons about a fictional juice, so. Happy days!

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ssaalexblake · 1 year

Note

I’d be interested in hearing your thoughts on the Ghost Monument. I know some people feel the stakes aren’t high enough, and that maybe if the racers were pitted against each other more it could be a more ‘interesting’ episode I guess, but I find the dynamics of the 2 guest cast to be interesting because they aren’t enemies, they’re not friends either but there’s not a desire to kill each other, because they are their out of necessity and to me that’s more then just being there out of ego or a prize. That surrounded by the history of the Stenza on the planet, it’s fascinating and one where I don’t think I’m fully across yet, so would be interested in hearing your thoughts.

Honestly, I was mostly just shocked that people thought this episode was bad? It wouldn't make my favourites list but there's literally nothing wrong with it either in plot or the execution of it imo. I enjoy it in a rewatch! It builds important dynamics and sets up important arcs. The foundation for the main characters are more firmly set.

Also, like, whatever peoples feelings on the stakes in this episode, it should be noted that The Ghost Monument as an episode has a dark twin. Its name is Ascension of the Cybermen. Narratively they function as a pair and the second one is supposed to be a lot darker with more stakes that shows the development of the characters, so you can't really do that if the first one is absolutely Go Go Go GO high stakes all the whole way through? The tonal difference belays the seriousness of the second episode. The contrast shows to demonstrate both how far the fam have come in AotC and how far 13 has fallen from TGM.

Not to say the sitch they're in in TGM isn't serious, it is, but this is not super stressful to the doctor, she's not, till the very end, scared she can't return them home or that they'll die (well. anymore than the doctor apparently normally is. The monologue in Once, Upon Time was fabulous but very sad). The fam are mostly just following 13's lead to get through this all figuring it's their best chance. In the second episode, they show their own initiative. In effect TGM is their training wheel episode that allows them to survive when the stakes get high.

The links between 11x01 & 2 and 12x09 & 10 give me Life. Such brilliant arching plot threads. Great bookends to Ryan and Graham's time on the show.

And really? This is a personal opinion, but disaster apocalyptic scenarios (which this is applicable to even if our group aren't natives of the place) where everybody lives in hell but just fight and try and kill each other as well as the environment trying to off them are just Bad. And belays an absolutely twisted view of us as a species. I feel like them all banding together when it gets tough and forming a community, if a very terse one where not everybody gets along, is actually an accurate portrayal of people in general. Even whatshisface Enzo or whatever joined the group he hated for safety because he was a lousy person, yeah, but he was Not stupid. I cannot stand grimdark crap like those zombie shows where people just kill each other en masse in their warring factions or whatever like the whole of human history isn't us forming societies and working together.

But speaking of whatever his name is, I feel like his contributions to the dialogue of the episode played an important part in delivering the themes they were going for, so making them fight instead would just have damaged the episode's core aims.

Mr 'I love my mum she taught me people are awful and selfish and horrible by breaking my trust and allowing me to get badly injured' is, congrats, the first person in this era to talk about his terrible mother whom 13 Immediately says sucks (gee i wonder why they did that. he even got hurt because he fell and his mum didn't save him). This is also the first time the cycle of abuse is mentioned because uh, the loser in the mother of the year competition did it specifically so it'd perpetuate itself in her son. This is the episode the timeless child is first mentioned. Considering the cornerstone of the arc is that this child in the end Broke that chain of abuse I do not consider this a coincidence. I'd bet him and his mother would think that Tecteun made that child Strong by what they did to them. 13 did Not like this man and she wouldn't, he's a dark mirror but also the victim of a really shitty mother.

There are other things i take note of in this episode. It's the first time out of post regeneration weirdness we see 13 really hit her stride. It's the first time we see her eschew pacifism as Her Thing despite the fact that she's already demonstrated her willingness to use violence with a few bombs the ep previous. Contextual morality. Reoccurring theme. It Wasn't a good idea to use violence in the situation she was in in TGM. Still doesn't make her a pacifist though bc lol, the bomb thing. So it's Kind of the first blatant portrayal of 13's private actions contrasting ones witnessed by the fam which are used to make her look better in their eyes. This will continue all season.

The stenza are now explicitly portrayed as violent colonizers as opposed to weird guys with the universe's most messed up election system. The lady is going through a race from hell is here to buy her loved ones out of the hell of their society. It's the first time the theme Properly pops up in the era. The first of many times. 13 continues to be a support to Ryan here, deepening their relationship. She's dad-ing him. She's not mad, she's disappointed! (she's also mad). She's also supportive of him.

I also think that 13 totally running out of ideas and thinking they're all gonna die at the end when the others disappear and the tardis does Not appear sets up something interesting. The fam, the ones who have been sceptical about her ability to save them this ep but still figure her as their best chance Immediately bolster her confidence and try and prop her up. They continue with the 'you've got this doc, we have faith in you!!' for a while after that, i assume they think she needs the morale boost? But I think it just leaves her with this terrifying pressure in the end?

She tries to let them know later on that this travelling is Dangerous and that they could get hurt but i think they have kind of started to buy into their own hype about her by then and aren't as worried as they should be. They think tim shaw is the worst of the worst the whole of s11 and 13 doesn't barely deign to acknowledge him bc he's so beneath her. So by the time the real bad guys pop out of the woodwork that Actually scare her the fam are overconfident in her ability to save them, which in turn eventually leaves them in the AOTC situation where they have to save themselves because she Cannot save them herself. She gave them an out before then and they didn't take it because they were not worried. I think the journey to that overconfidence starts right here.

I guess if i had to gripe it'd be that the scene where the two racers decide to take the prize together was Way too easy and more of a footnote in the story? There wasn't really another way this was going to end, but still. That seemed a little weakly done to me. I'd like a little bit more time devoted to it because it's not like i can't think of a few different scenarios to get here, it's just they'd have taken more screen time. In the end, I think that the episode had more important plot threads to go into so they just rushed it a bit. Maybe that's where people wanted more conflict? I don't want more conflict as much as a deeper discussion. They Didn't have a gripe with each other beyond that they were competing against each other and wanted to win and it didn't seem to occur to them that they could just share. But also, i've not watched this for a while. Maybe i'm misremembering, but i remember it feeling short to me.

idk, in the end it reminds me, weirdly, of Jurassic park where they're working their way across the park to the guest centre when all the dinos are escaped. Yes they're in danger and at times it's severe, but they have time to talk and bond and work together using their own skills as a group. The stakes Are high, there be monsters out to kill them and they want to go home, but it's also not 100% dire at all times. It hits the same mood for me.

This episode wasn't grim but it wasn't trying to be either so i guess if you Like grim it'd be a disappointment, but it did what it wanted to pretty well with setting stuff up and having a reasonable compelling episode plot.

Also... It's Super pretty. The bright sun. Glorious.

#13stardisposts #dw shit #dw meta #kind of #i mostly just talked #i like this ep and i'm mostly just surprised people object to it so much???

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vaalthus · 6 days

Text

The Mana Core (Spoilers)

Oh boy have things escalated quickly.

I have to say I like the brief gander through the Project Casca laboratory. It reminds me all too well of sequences in other video games, in which, characters finds themselves in dreary or primitive settings only to find highly advanced sterile white rooms indicating they are in the presence of something that completely contrasts the settings they've been in prior that tells them immediately that something is either very off or that the world around them is much bigger than they realize.

Unfortunately, in the case of the Magesterium's little white room, we learn that we should very much be in a state of unease when learning the consequences of their use of this facility. To learn that the Mana Core is not self-replenishing is very concerning, as it makes manaphages more terrifying, and it's alarming that the Magesters are more than fine with continuing to take pieces of the Core if it means they can have a stranglehold on their empire and how far it reaches if no alternatives can be substituted for the Core. I'm curious as to whether or not they would have brought Lore to the very brink before giving up on this resource and I feel like we already know the answer to that.

and speaking of alternatives...

Rather interesting to learn that the Exalted did, as suspected, come across MQ based technology and incorporated into their own works. What I find interesting is that one of these remnants was used in the creation of the Exalted Artillery. It certainly explains why the Exalted were able to forge a weapon capable of harming the Aequilibria to begin with as there has been a bit of consistent theme of mechquest related structures, or entities, being able to kind of just break the rules of reality. I wonder, in looking upon this revelation, if Notha would be proud she followed in similar footsteps of the Exalted when it came to incorporating and manipulating technology.

Which of course explains why Akanthus can't be bounded by the rules of magic in this world and is incredibly strong. Not only is he accessing the vast well of mana that the Magesters so desperately wanted to tap into for themselves one day, which grants him a strong body, but he is also slipping past the laws of the magic that governs Lore. Or perhaps more accurately, those laws are overlooking him so to speak. Either way, the world just doesn't know what to do with something like him or rather what he's been connected to.

I genuinely do love the amount of self-pitying Akanthus does in this moment. Yes, it does suck that Sobieslav was effectively raised up alongside other children to be experimented upon until they achieved a state that they were rendered effectively magicless in a world defined by magic and that they might just fade into the Ether once they die but it doesn't justify all they did after they were exiled by the Magesterium. It doesn't justify all those he killed or allowed to be killed in the Land of Dragons nor all the suffering he caused under the guise that he was achieving the peace the Rose claimed it offered.

He implies his lack of mana is what made him a monster, inhuman, but it's not. It was his selfishness, brutality, and apathy towards the lives of others. You were human Akanthus. You just chose to be the worst of what we had to offer.

For a moment, I thought this was going to be the most terrifying moment in this quest...

I even thought perhaps this was going to be that moment, but no there was something much worse waiting to happen. Also screw this guy for putting his hands on the dragon child!

*Ahem* No what was actually terrifying was this moment.

The Aequilibria, the gods of this universe, reawakened. Imagine my utter horror at the fact that it wasn't Jaania trying to weave herself into the Core or the doom bomb being the cause of this moment but us bringing Draco, one of its creation, being the reason why the gods woke up to see what was going on in their world.

Curiously enough, they bare the face of Sk'aar prior to turning back to the eight elemental stars we can see at the top of the Exaltia tower when fighting the Engineer in the Inn. This seems somewhat odd given that Sk'aar seemed to be implying they wanted to awaken a separate entity alongside us which seemed to be the Aequilibria itself.

I just love how this moment proved my suspicion that the eight eyes of Sk'aar we saw in AdventureFriends were supposed to be representative of the Elements which makes sense given the only reason we had that dream in the first place is because the love potion we drank had Quintessence in it, something that clearly contains all eight prime elements within it.

Curiosities on the visage of Aequilibria aside, what follows next is a pitiful sight.

This seems a narrtively fitting end for Akanthus if he can't be harmed. For the longest time, Akanthus viewed himself as an abomination cheated out of his rightful place in the world alongside everyone else and committed countless atrocities in his quest to regain that place. Going as far as waking up the gods of this universe to grant him his way. Upon awakening, they confirm that he is indeed an impurity to the natural order of the world but they do not grant him the connection he seeks. No instead, they remove him even further from the world itself and they contain him in a way only a god can when killing isn't an option. I don't know if this farewell for good to Akanthus since his soul still exists but if so I say goodbye and good riddance to bad rubbish.

With Akanthus finally neutralized, we turn our attention to the elephant in the room:

Our gods are analyzing the state of their creation.

And they are not pleased with the current status of Lore one bit.

All of Lore has just been marked for death because a frozen arch magus and one big metal butthead couldn't leave stuff alone.

Interestingly enough it seems like Aequilibria was referring to the twin cycles when they asked if it was time to start anew. This makes me wonder if Draco themselves aren't necessarily the true destroyer that is meant to wipe clean Lore but merely responsible in alerting Aequilibria when it times to refresh the system and Fluffy in turn is meant to alert them when its time to create life again. It seems somewhat unlikely, especially if they meant they were only waking up because the cycle has gone so wrong, but the Aequilibria makes it sound as if they were supposed to be woken up at set intervals.

What concerns me most though is the way they speak. Others have already pointed out that they talk very robotic in nature, very similarly to how Sk'aar spoke in one of the AdventureFriend routes, and their decisions are very straight to the point and seemingly without any trace of nuance.

Connections to MQ aside, this is very much a being that expects order and nothing but order in the system they have created and if it deems its creation has deviated too far from the system it will conclude to destroy it. I do not have high hopes for being able to reason with such an entity. It took the resources of all the Exalted to force this thing out of commission for a period of time so we are in some serious trouble.

#dragonfable #dragonfable spoilers #I'm becoming increasingly apprehensive towards the Magesterium again #I'm surprised how quickly the doom corruption went away like it had gotten vented out of the room #Makes me wonder if did actually affect the Aequilibria's assessment #Akanthus is finally contained where his ass belongs #I felt so bad for Draco when their parents started reading off their assessment #they looked like they were in so much trouble #remthalas was right #they simply are

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icarian-tragedy · 8 days

Text

—on top of the dresser, i wanna undress her.

Genshin Impact Rosaria x GN!Reader.

Tags ; Explicit Sexual Content. Face-Sitting. Hair-Pulling. Light Dom/Sub. Cunnilingus. Top!Rosaria. Power Bottom!Reader. Degradation. Dirty Talk.

AN ; first fic i’m getting around to posting here and it’s the 1k essay i wrote about eating this woman out… whoops. You can find more of my fics on my AO3 under the same username! Obviously this is smut, 18+, read at your own risk. ⚠️

“Are you ready to confess?”

Her voice is like wine as she speaks, smooth and intoxicating, lulling you out of the recesses of your mind. It’s eerily similar to a predator luring out its prey, feigning innocence before it sinks its teeth into supple flesh. You suppose that’s more accurate than not, especially when it comes to Rosaria, but you both already know that she doesn’t need to catch you. No, you, her prey, come willingly. Again and again.

She’s straddling your head, entirely nude save for white gloves and the metallic claws she loves to clink together when she’s bored. Despite her title of “Sister”, Rosaria looks like sin incarnate. You can see the arousal smeared between her thighs, the folds of her cunt glistening in the low lamplight. You can’t deny that it makes you a little smug, being able to have such an effect on her, someone so usually nonchalant and detached.

Nevertheless, you aren’t here to gloat or gawk. Rosaria had spoken to you, and you knew better than to keep her waiting. You may be special to her in a way no one else is, enough to warrant these special “confessions”, but even you aren’t spared her impatience.

“Yes.” It leaves your lungs in a rush of air, your hands seeking out her narrow hips and clinging to them like a lifeline. Despite the belatedness of your response, Rosaria seems satisfied.

“Then get to it,” she muses, hovering just above your face.

You don’t need any further invitation, you urge her down and she lowers herself on you. Rosaria has never been the shy type so she has no shame in fully sitting, threatening to smother you in her cunt. Not that you mind, Archons no. You squeeze her waist to let her know you’re comfortable, and then get to work.

Your tongue glides over her soaked folds like a man starved, alternating between kitten licks at her clit and full on lapping at her like the dog Rosaria would say you are. You can’t help yourself, the taste of her is addictive. She moans somewhere above you, never that loud, but always sure to express her enjoyment. She moves her hips in little thrusts against your tongue, essentially riding it.

“Dirty little sinner,” Rosaria rasps, tangling her hand in your hair. Her metal claws scrape harshly at your scalp and make it sting, but you’re too focused on devouring her to care. “If only you did this as much as you ran your mouth.”

Your only reply is a pathetic whine that gets muffled by her pussy, your jaw aching as you open it wider and latch onto her, sucking. Rosaria’s hips jolt involuntarily and she lets out a drawn out groan, her thighs squeezing around your head as she presses herself down on your face, blindly chasing the sensation. Like this, you really can’t breathe, but why would you need to? All you need to do is pleasure her, make her feel good. It’s what you were made for, all you were good for.

“Fuck, that’s it,” Rosaria praises, now rutting against you. “Eat up like the whore you are. What would the other Sisters think? Knowing that one of their most devoted attendees is just a slut that loves to sin. No amount of hymns or prayers will ever cleanse you of that.”

You diligently lick up the slick that drips from her slit, delving your tongue inside in search of more. You could care less about her degrading words, it’s not as though she’s wrong. You aren’t devout or even particularly religious, though you’re certainly good at feigning interest. The only reason you even frequent the church is for her. To see her, to speak to her, anything.

It had started out innocently enough, just you dropping off some cecilias on behalf of a commission from Barbara, but she hadn’t been there. Instead you’d been greeted by a tall, brooding woman with pale, yellow eyes and an unwavering scowl. Rosaria had been intimidating to say the least, but something about her captivated you. There were no masks or lies with her, she was honest to the point of nearly being insensitive. She spoke her mind without shame or care, and she did what she pleased.

Ironically, it would seem that what Rosaria enjoyed doing the most was you.

She’s getting close now, you can tell. Her thighs clench and unclench around your head, her control over her muscles beginning to waver as she gives herself over to the pleasure. You can’t see her, but her head has fallen back and her eyes have closed, her lips parted as low sounds escape her. Your own arousal pulses with neglect as you hear Rosaria moan out your name.

As she begins to buck against you, you focus once more on shoving your tongue inside her sopping cunt, your nose occasionally bumping her swollen clit as she moves. Rosaria gasps out, breathless as she tightens her grip on your hair to the point of pain, but you don’t care. You eat out her pussy like it’ll be your last meal, delighted by the way you can feel it twitch against your lips, getting wetter as her orgasm approaches.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck… Don’t you waste a drop,” Rosaria pants from above. Her free hand is fisting the sheets and if you aren’t mistaken, you think you can hear them tear as a result of her claws.

You lap at her until your jaw grows sore and then, finally, she cums. Watching Rosaria reach her peak will forever be a sight you’ll never tire of, you’re sure it’s the closest you’ll ever get to Celestia while alive. Her juices coat your face as she chants your name like it’s the only prayer worth reciting, and you can’t help but muse over the fact that it’s the most energy you’ve ever seen her exude for something like that.

You do your best to help Rosaria ride out her high, licking up her fluids dutifully and doing your damndest to prolong her pleasure. After what seems like forever, she lifts herself from your face, finally too sensitive to stand the stimulation. Her thighs are trembling with the effort of holding herself up, and you can see a faint flush on her face. Aside from that and the sheen of sweat on her skin, Rosaria appears unfairly composed otherwise.

“Did I do good?” You ask her, a coy smile on your lips as you peer up at her. Rosaria responds with a scoff, but you glimpse the smile she wears as she shifts off of you and leans down for a kiss instead. She’s unbothered by the taste of herself, exploring your mouth and sucking at your tongue with a reverence you’d never known her to have.

“I suppose it was satisfactory,” she hums upon pulling back, chuckling quietly.

“Only satisfactory?” You pout, but she’s quick to quell your impending brattiness. She taps a clawed finger against your cheek, and the dim lighting almost makes it seem like her eyes are glowing.

“Don’t start. We aren’t done yet,” Rosaria murmurs. Her gaze is downcast, fixated now on your forgotten arousal. You can’t help but shiver, and you know your reaction makes her smug, moving her way down until she’s kneeling between your legs.

“Let’s see what else that mouth of yours can do, Sinner.”

#genshin impact #genshin rosaria #rosaria x reader #gender neutral reader #smut #fanfic #ao3 writer #my work #my writing #I am so in love with her #rosaria one chance pls

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entomolog-t · 3 months

Note

For today gtWAC prompt:

I’d love to know if you have thoughts on how you write pacing, I absolutely love the pace of your stories, especially emotional scenes and internal dilemmas/thoughts of characters

Thank you!! This made my day! I love playing around with pacing so prepare for a ridiculously in-depth answer.

My first step is to make a crusty outline. I get- outlines suck. But if we want to figure out pacing, its a really good idea to have a start and end point. It also helps me to process the emotions as close to real-time as possible.

Its fast and ugly.

Once I get the whole seen bullet pointed I go back through it and actually get to work out pacing it. Given that I have an outline to go off of, I have a better idea where to build tension and where to make things more harsh and high paced (Short sentences, quick emotional descriptions).

In high stress/high paced writing I usually don't allow my characters to have a good deal of control over their conscious thoughts (ie- repression of emotions they would not want to think is a lot harder and more abrasive). When you're dealing with a high stress/high pace situation you're conscious can't filter information the same way, so its a good spot to sneak in sharp bits of honesty, that gets interjected with flashes of conscious/logical thought.

I think its really important to actively try to feel the emotions and understand how they impact thought- ie if its a high fear, fast paced scenario I'm not going to be contemplating things eloquently- and even when its more conscious thought, it feels disjointed, or counter instinctual. A lot of emotions have a semi logical flow that can differ based on your character, so understanding if Character A gets startled- it starts out as a sudden shock, turns to confusion, then fear, then anger maybe.

I love to slip in this sort of intrusive thought aspect when characters are dealing with dilemmas (We see this a lot in Bite Me, with Aedes). Where he will think one thing and correct the thought, or have an intrusive voice add to the thought.

With emotions, especially internally, it can be really hard to show not tell, and I think controlling the way one reads the sentences can be a particularly effective way to really showcase the emotion. Like restarting a sentence but changing a singular word to show emphasis.

The biggest take away I think id when writing, we don't need to be accurate in describing the reality thats happening, but instead the reality that the character is experiencing. You don't need to tell me getting bit hurts- everyone knows that- I want to know what it does to the character.

#I really hope this helps.#I was debating about writing a whole short to walk though the process a little more indepth #I hope this is good #but if not I can always add some more or elaborate!!#gtWAC

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pesterloglog · 4 months

Text

Jade Harley, Roxy Lalonde

Act 6, page 6291-6297

JADE: excuse me but did you just "laugh your ass off" at me under your breath

ROXY: ummm

ROXY: yea

ROXY: maybe

JADE: :|

JADE: i fail to see what is so amusing

ROXY: u do

ROXY: seriously?

JADE: .....

JADE: ok i guess the situation is a little funny because of this absurd folder

JADE: and the fact that i woofed at you probably didnt help either

JADE: but im not here to share a good laugh over the old ladys sense of design or her penchant for scrapbooking!

JADE: i am here to make sure that you do as youre told

ROXY: ugh

JADE: now take the file and review your assignment

ROXY: i already looked at it

ROXY: its dumb and impossible and i aint cooperating w her regardless!

JADE: yes you will

ROXY: can we change the subject

JADE: no

ROXY: arent you jakes grandma

JADE: thats what he told me when we were pen pals

JADE: but i think its more accurate to say im his alternate universe biological daughter

ROXY: oh

ROXY: that clears that up then

JADE: yes, it does :p

JADE: now take the damn folder

ROXY: so alt grannydaughter english

ROXY: whyre u part dog + evil lookin

JADE: DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!!

ROXY: what

JADE: my surname is harley not english

JADE: but you may refer to me as jade, or ma'am if you are feeling especially nervous and deferential

JADE: which as it turns out is the way you should be feeling about me, ALWAYS >:B

ROXY: LOL!!!

JADE: lol WHAT

ROXY: jade i am in no way buying that ur normally this pompous and tyrannical

ROXY: the shtick rly doesnt suit you its so obvious

ROXY: why you doin the batterhags tacky bidding anyway

ROXY: she got you under an xtra terrestrial fish spell or

JADE: SILENCE!!!!!!

ROXY: OOF!

JADE: open the file

ROXY: mrphmmphumph

JADE: OPEN IT!

ROXY: fine :(

ROXY: ok i opened it

ROXY: hey look its the same shit as before

ROXY: im supposed to make this weird knobbly spike ball appear out of nothin

JADE: yes

ROXY: ok got it

ROXY: let me give it a shot then

ROXY: ...

ROXY: welp still impossible

ROXY: what now maam??

JADE: it is not impossible

ROXY: is 2

JADE: you are the rogue of void

JADE: dont you know what that means?

ROXY: i dunno

ROXY: means i can turn invisible and stuff?

ROXY: like the blonde in that crappy superhero quartet

JADE: it means a lot more than that

JADE: your true powers are more impressive than those of anyone else in your crappy quartet

JADE: in fact i would say they are almost as cool as mine >:)

ROXY: not sure the ability to make weird spikeballs outta nothin is all that cool tbh

JADE: not just spikeballs!

JADE: imagine that your title is roughly synonymous with "one who steals nothing"

JADE: what do you think it means to be able to steal nothing?

ROXY: it means

ROXY: im like a shitty cat burglar who sucks at her job?

JADE: WRONG

JADE: it means just the opposite

JADE: it means you can steal the essence of nothingness from something

JADE: you can rob nothingness from an idea if you put your mind to it

JADE: effectively allowing you to conjure virtually anything out of thin air

ROXY: omg

ROXY: u cant be serious

ROXY: that is way too much superpower 4 a dork like me 2 have

JADE: grrrrr...

ROXY: oh no

ROXY: pls dont growl @ me dogjade

ROXY: is legit frightening :(

JADE: im sorry, but your remarks of self deprecation made me very angry

JADE: once i was even more of a dork than you

JADE: but now i am one of the most powerful beings who has ever existed

JADE: i dont want to hear any whining about what you think you cant do

JADE: you are hereby under strict orders from myself and her condescension to "clam up" and conjure that orb, do you understand?

ROXY: so im just supposed to

ROXY: sit here and think about this ugly ball

ROXY: and twiddle my fingers or somethin

ROXY: ?

JADE: you tell me

JADE: space is my racket, not void

ROXY: maybe it would help if i knew what the dang thing WAS

ROXY: how am i supposed to steal the nonexistence from a concept when the concept only exists in my mind as "ugly ball"

JADE: its called the matriorb

JADE: it is the key to resurrecting the troll race

JADE: once you create it the empress will hatch it on an uninhabited planet located beyond the reach of her cruel employer

JADE: there her people will have another chance to thrive without the ever looming threat of extinction that comes with his influence

JADE: so you see roxy, there is nothing noble about refusing to help

JADE: once an entire alien race went extinct because of a terrible monster, and you can help give them a second chance

JADE: dont you want that?

ROXY: um

ROXY: in theory sure i guess

ROXY: but ur basically asking me to bring a lot of people back to life so they can be slaves to that witch

ROXY: u want me to help make all these fresh new trolls but then just turn em over to her? like here you go have fun SNORKELBITCH MEGAHITLER

ROXY: i do not actually think i wanna do that??

JADE: yes fair enough, but heres the other thing...

JADE: if you dont i am going to kill you

ROXY: oh noes

JADE: oh yesses!

JADE: a literal plurality of yesses

JADE: seeing as you are a god tier it is very likely you will come back to life

JADE: so i can just keep killing you over and over a different way each time

JADE: maybe i will disembowel you a few times

JADE: i will not even need to use my sharp doggy teeth!

JADE: i will just snap my fingers and your delicious guts will teleport outside your body

ROXY: ew!

JADE: no way more like yum

JADE: i will just keep on killing you again and again

JADE: until you finally get tired of dying and follow your orders

ROXY: maaan

ROXY: evil jade is sucky jade

JADE: i believe you will find i am the suckiest jade there is

JADE: now we are going to be here in this cell for as long as it takes

JADE: i am not going anywhere until you try doing your voidey thing and make something appear

JADE: is that understood?

ROXY: blehhhh

ROXY: fine

ROXY: why u gotta be so awful jade

ROXY: really putting a cramp on us makin choice new friends w each other

ROXY: oh well here goes

ROXY: all twiddlin my fingers and such

ROXY: busting out tha MAJYYXXX! prayin up a storm to the holy wizardchrist they aint fake...

ROXY: alright check it

ROXY: one jank ass space egg coming up

ROXY: ABRACA HAPPEN!

ROXY: this is not a space egg

JADE: no, its not

ROXY: balls

ROXY: guess i effed up my void spell

ROXY: what is this thing

JADE: thats a perfectly generic object

ROXY: its perfectly generic?

JADE: yes

ROXY: dunno about that

ROXY: looks like a green cube to me

ROXY: with like

ROXY: slightly beveled corners

JADE: thats what a perfectly generic object is

ROXY: couldnt something theoretically be more generic than this

JADE: how

ROXY: um

ROXY: i dunno

JADE: exactly

ROXY: :\

JADE: if you want your powers to reach their full potential youre going to need to become more familiar with the fundamental building blocks of ideas and how they translate into more complicated thoughts and forms

JADE: then it becomes a simple matter of using your abilities to snatch those concepts from unreality

ROXY: sounds too hard

ROXY: better start killing me repeatedly and get it over with

JADE: we both know you dont think its too hard, you think it sounds like an interesting challenge

ROXY: dammit!

ROXY: (fucken jakes wily bitch ass grandma)

JADE: this is a very good start though

JADE: with a little practice im sure our empress will have her orb in no time

ROXY: well at least i know i can make a whole lot of these boring cubes if all else fails

ROXY: hey maybe ill build a sick fort outta them

ROXY: hehehe jade tell me that wouldnt be so baller

JADE: it would be fairly baller

ROXY: fyeah

JADE: keep trying for that orb though

JADE: i will return in a while to review your progress

JADE: and remember, dont get any funny ideas

ROXY: but p much all my ideas are funny

JADE: i mean dont try to escape!

JADE: even if you are invisible i will be able to track you down instantly

JADE: my sense of smell is very good

JADE: now if youll excuse me i have some business to attend to

ROXY: what business

JADE: i am still trying to locate my brother

JADE: but im having trouble picking up his scent

JADE: hes using his windy powers to obscure the trail and its giving me fits

ROXY: windy powers eh

ROXY: who is your bro?

JADE: woof!!!

JADE: i mean shoosh :x

JADE: that is enough questions from you

JADE: now i believe you have a space egg to conjure

ROXY: (mumble mumble egg mumble shove it grumble)

JADE: what?

ROXY: (mumble mutter my fat ass)

JADE: farewell roxy

#homestuck #jade harley #roxy lalonde #homestuck act 6 #page 6291 #page 6292 #page 6293 #page 6294 #page 6295 #page 6296 #page 6297 #homestuck act 6 act 6 #homestuck act 6 act 6 intermission 1

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