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#ive been going out irl a lot more recently honestly
maeslay · 8 months
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wow i havent posted in awhile here anyways school is starting o the 31th for me so im gonna post even less now goodbye
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genderkoolaid · 2 months
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hi! your blog's been encouraging to me as a trans guy, but i've recently felt that i should no longer call myself that/should just "go back to" being a girl, and idk if my train of thought makes any sense...so i just wanted to ask someone w more experience (but feel free to ignore this rant/call me out if im not making sense btw)
so yeah, my cousin's been out to me as a (binary) trans man for a few years now, and in trying to find understanding, i came out to him a few months later, but got a very flat/kinda disgusted reaction. despite my consistent support for him over the years, he has continued to "joke" about my looks/short hair and dismisses any attempts at serious conversations or even just jokes about gender/being a guy too. he also calls me things ive told him makes me uncomfortable (gender-wise) and then acts like it means nothing. he generally brushes me off by telling me to stop trying to compare myself to him, and is either prickly about it or just in-your-face "idgaf what you're talking about and i'm tired of you." it barely hurts me anymore, but ive felt connected to trans-ness for so many years (longer than id even known he was too) and his reaction to this part of me has honestly made me wonder if i'm just making it up/am trying too hard or something,,,like maybe i'm just trying to cover for being a gross 20-somethings woman ?? idk ?
i'm probably just being over-sensitive, and i dont feel it's outright malicious or anything (maybe he just doesn't think/care about it as much as me?), but i have nobody else to ask (no irl friends/people im out to) and i'm currently renting/living with him, which has brought these worries to the forefront. thanks if youve read this far, but please don't feel pressured to respond!
Your cousin sounds like he has a lot of internalized transphobia he's directing at you. Unfortunately there are trans people who try to prop themselves up and make themselves feel more confident in their transness by tearing down others. You are not being over-sensitive, and regardless of what he thinks he's doing, he's actively being cruel to you. You are well within your rights to be hurt by his actions. Living with someone who is constantly being transphobic to you is traumatizing- detransitioning can be a coping method for those who have to constantly defend themselves from transphobic abuse.
If its possible, I would recommend trying to see if there are any queer orgs in your area you could connect with (physically or online). At the least, you may find some people who can give you emotional support, and they also may be able to find you a better living situation. Even if that's not possible right now, keep reminding yourself that his behavior is cruel and you are allowed to be upset about it. You do not need to take any of his opinions on your gender seriously. You are not making up your transness or trying too hard. You are not over-sensitive, you are being hurt.
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blackbackedjackal · 13 days
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please try to sell me gw2. i really want to like it and ive tried a couple times over the years to get into it, but every time my experience is like: walk for 5 irl minutes -> talk to someone -> kill 20 things -> random world events -> kill 50 things -> go back and talk to the person. rinse and repeat
and then i uninstall the game
Hard to sell it to ya when it's free to play ;0
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As a new/returning player I honestly recommend going in with some friends. It's a game were you can absolutely solo PvE with the right build, but I always have more fun playing with my friends for the shenanigans. I also, 100%, recommend plopping an OC in the game. My first characters were both in-game and all their lore is based around GW2, but putting June in there has been hella fun to see how she would handle being in Tyria.
Your first 80 levels are basically to help get you accustom to the game mechanics and the story. Though the story is optional, I recommend playing it so you get more of a feel of Tyria and the history. The story also leads you through the game an the map rather than just taking random quests as you explore. It's really the only mode that gives you a bit of direction in the game.
If you happen to get stuck or have any questions about the game, it's pretty safe to ask the map chat and usually people will help you out, especially in early maps. GW2 is a game that doesn't really teach you how to play, you learn as you go. There's also plenty of YT vids on how to get started and tutorials if you get stuck or suggestions of things to try out as you level. They've also updated the game fairly recently where you now have access to the Raptor mount without needing to have Path of Fire or doing the expansion, which is a HUGE quality of life change while you explore the early maps.
Once your toon hits level 80, that's when you unlock your mastery tracks that will allow you to do more of the endgame content and continue through the living story. Fractals, Raids, Dungeons, Strikes, World Bosses, Meta Trains, Gold Farming, PvP, WvW, FASHION WARS!!, There's a ton to do once you're set up, and again, lots of resources available to help you out (TaCO, GW2 Efficiency, Crafting Guides).
The world is unique. It feels lived in and ever expanding. The lore for all the playable races in the game is really interesting and they do a lot to subvert expectations from typical fantasy stories. Some things are a hit or miss for a lot of folks but there's so much to love about the game even my least favorite parts are like just mid to me compared to the parts I genuinely enjoy. My favorite expansion is Path of Fire + Season 4. The desert maps are my favorites followed by Maguma (begrudgingly). Cantha had grown on me a lot after a million Leviathan Farms for gold lol. THE SEASONAL EVENTS AHHH like again there's just so much to touch on but yeah the long and short of it is it IS a time sink at minimum to get to the more favored content, but even as a old player I still love making new toons and taking them through the early game content again just for fun.
But yeah, free to play, no subscriptions, all expansions are a one time purchase. You've got 10 years worth of content to explore and try out. It's a relatively inexpensive MMO (the expacs can be up to 50% off during certain yearly sales). An overall very helpful community. Any paid content is mostly cosmetics and convenience items, but nothing that gives you an advantage over other players. Basically everyone is grinding towards a similar end-goal, so you can always get the same gear as people through grinding. Nothing is really out of reach and people are always willing to help others out with multiplayer content.
I've been consistently playing for 8-9 years now. It's one of those game where I'm IN it for like a few months then may take a few months off until a holiday event I love is coming up and then I play for a few months again. It's probably the only other game I've sunk as much time into as Pokemon or Skyrim over the years (I jokingly call it Skyrim Online since ya'll won't catch me playing ESO). But yeah just, it's a game I never expected to play for this long and this consistently and it always feels fun to pick back up. Genuinely I do hope you give it another try. I've honestly had the most fun I've had in years with the wave of new and returning players jumping back into the game c:
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jinchuls-moved · 5 months
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hi, important lil note
pseud change, jinx -> echo
you don’t have to read but there’s a not so thought out ramble of all the thoughts in my head rn under the cut. i feel like ive been tricking people and i want to explain myself
okay so, i moved blogs when i was in a very negative space. i only stayed away for about a month, i missed tumblr and i missed writing even if it took me a hot minute to feel good enough to even be semi active on here.
tumblr can fucking suck. i left because there was drama with a few people that left me a mess honestly, those people have since been blocked and i started to feel a little bit better. i also noticed a number of people breaking mutual with me, which i completely understand curate your space as you need i’ve done it a few times myself, but the amount of people that did in a short time (as far as i noticed) gave me a terrible feeling and i needed to leave. i felt unwelcome and like i had done something wrong to people i had only interacted with a few times. this was on top of a lot of stuff i had going on irl, i felt so fucking alone in every aspect on my life regardless of my friends that made it so obvious they were there for me. i hated how i was at the time, and i appreciate every single person that stuck by me.
so i made this blog for a fresh start. i thought a new pseud and a new blog would make me feel better. and it did, for a while. my friends knew and they listened to my request to change tags, not refer to me as any previous nicknames and essentially not make it too obvious it was me. although i don’t think it was entirely impossible to tell. but now i miss all those things, i miss being stupid with my friends, i miss getting to call my best friend my wife on dash, i miss getting to miss astrology aims and mother nesi nesi, i miss the mutuals i used to have that i didn’t tell about the move because i was scared they were going to think i was stupid. i miss the url i kept going back to bc i loved it (possibly the most silly reason but still ukaishin holds a special place in my heart)
and it just doesn’t feel right. everyone has been so nice to me so far and it feels wrong knowing that wasn’t how echo ended, it makes me wonder what was wrong with me then that wasn’t now? but reality is, it’s nothing. shit happens, i needed time to get over a lot of things and it took time. even quite recently i had a terrible evening because of an old mutual. as in i had a mental breakdown because they added one stupid word to an ask that made me feel pathetic for sitting there the night before crying about how much i was missing them to aims.
getting called jinx in dms throws me off, i appreciate those that knew me first as echo using the new pseud, but it never took. it was never a name i was happy with (except for the first couple weeks on this blog) and im sorry for any confusion and having to switch pseuds again. i just don’t want to move blogs, i don’t want to have a whole thing i just want tumblr to be the happy place it was for me for almost 2 years. it got me through uni, being on here with the friends i’d made, i spend my final year of school in a constant mental breakdown, crying on the phone to my mum almost everyday and it was kaze that kept me going, motivating me to get my degree. it was kaze that flew to england to meet me and attend my graduation. it was aims that was the first person to reach out to me and give me the type of friendship i needed. it was everyone in our silly delululand server that made me laugh and reminded me that no matter how shit people were there were good ones. and it’s the good that’s made me feel better. and the good that makes me want to try one more time to maintain that happy place i had 2 years ago
that got too sappy but i refuse to edit <3
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aanabear2803 · 1 day
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hi i've seen your posts about body weight and I as a fat girl, was wondering if you are open to talk about it or give advice about it
I have been struggling real bad with it lately, I thought I was ok and had been for a few years, turns out I hate my body so much and you seem so confident, you got any advice? would you be open to talk about it in dm's?
feel free to ignore this if it's uncomfortable tho
Hi :3 um... so. I struggle with my own body weight a lot. I wont really talk about the bad thoughts that lurk about.
Ive been overweight since I was a wee lad. It especially hurts when my meds make me constantly hungry. Like I am always fucking hungry. So I just snacked the day away without any thoughts of consequences. I still eat these meds to this day. I am still as hungry as ever.
Id say I wont have very awesome advice? Because what I would normally do when those bad thoughts do happen is... post nudes on my kinky tumblr? Which, you know I dont expect others to do. Im sure there are healthier ways to express yourself than to go on tumblr and do shit like being half naked. However there are tons of gorgous women who dress in lingerie and post on tumblr all the time. You kinda just need to know where to look.
Ive also been trying to loose weight. But its more for a health thing since Im close to being diabetic and Im super duper not down for that myself. Im already tired of the meds Ive eaten I dont want to have to subject myself to stabs of insulin.
Im not on a fad diet of any kind. Im just eating 1200kcal a day watching as my weight slowly goes down~ I calculate all of this stuff too.
There's also the difference in how being fat and being unhealthy are wildly different. There's also that thing on how genetics have a say in the weight a person can be. But that is not my expertize at all! But you can be more than welcomed to go search and read up on those.
Ive been more open to exposing my skin a little at a time? Like wearing a bikini while in the pool when Im exercising. Ive been very recently trying to get corsets to work out too! Altho whether you like it or not there will be stares from people. But I would say start from the clothes, buy stuff you think would make you strut a runway. Dont just buy tshirts and pants and call it a day. Find a top in your size and fucking go for it. (Altho I understand many curvy people will not be able to find it cheap and Im just saying if you are desperate for the cash.... you can try Shein. Which I understand many Americans are banning and all the problems with fast fashion into overproduction but they do have many plus size clothes that most store dont normally have for people like us so you know its entirely up to you! But I was close to tears when I bought something and it just.... fits you know? Just dont go all out and buy their entire stock. I buy 5XL on there and dont worry about the number being so high, its probably based around the chinese style with their insane standards)
But hey look, people are going to judge no matter what ok? They always will. They will always find a way to trash talk. Its hard to ignore them, I get it. But theyre not you. They dont know if youre trying to loose weight or whether the food youre eating is a reward for having done a week of gym. Id honestly just say the fries are delicious and they should try it and we move on with our day. Its like online haters, you dont waste an hour of your life justifying things to them, so you have no reason to need to justify things to irl people.
I do hope this helps a little? I dont mind dms if you have any other questions of course :3
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bunnieshoneys · 4 months
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any thoughts on the recent news with haas? i didn’t first get into f1 through dts (coanda effect def brought me back into the f1 deep end thank you so much) but i know guenther was a fan fav :( wishing the best for him moving forward and the team this year!!
ive been dying to talk about this actually
so worth noting that im a new fan and my knowledge on haas is primarily from DTS bc ive only been into the sport since 2022 and dts only started 2018. i am of the opinion that they kind of?? fucked over mick schumacher but honestly the guy did also crack under pressure and caused a lot of damages so i dont feel that much sympathy for him or hate guenther/haas on his behalf like a lot of fans (although rumours say he fired mick in a hotel lobby which if true would be WILD)
i personally am of the opinion that guenther probably would've been out of a job a long time ago if he werent so key in the image of haas as a brand i.e. drive to survive focussing on his admittedly brilliant personality, and he's obviously faced some incredibly poor luck in the russia/ukraine conflict happening when it did, sponsors flaking etc etc
but, that being said, his decisions havent really helped the team forward and team principals hold the ultimate responsibility and can make or break a team and guenther... wasnt making it any better lol. we've seen what a huge difference a new TP can make (vasseur to ferrari, vowles to williams) and honestly i think haas needs this change lol. best of luck to guenther and he was brilliant as a personality but if he didnt have his personality he would've been let go a while ago i think, like binotto from ferrari
so yeah not exactly sad to see him go, but i am not a haas fan in the slightest lol and admittedly their success hinges a LOT on whether ferrari's parts are good that year, so we will see going into 2024 where ferrari is (rumoured!!) to be strong. i dont think their driver lineup is capable of delivering big results though, unlike in other mid/backfield teams like williams who have albon (who definitely out performed the car in 2023) and sauber who have bottas, who is incredibly capable on his day
:) more irl f1 questions pls i love this sport to death!
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boba-beom · 2 months
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Angel 💕,
I am sending this to you so late I’m so sorry 😞
I love that! I think it’s totally understandable to have something outside of your irl. Aww I love how you got into writing and tumblr I’m so glad you did!!! 🥺🥺
As for me ever since I can remember I was a reader I loved reading. My mom told me I loved telling stories when I was little like really really little (I am a talker and have always been hehe) the first time I got into reading was in first grade. I remember I got picked on by a teacher for not being able to read Greek very well and I would pause every few words. I was the only foreigner in the class so it was easy to get picked on lol. I remember going back home and telling my mom to go to a store that had books and I got lots of books so I can practice. I practiced really hard. Unfortunately I grew up as the child that moved schools a lot so from kindergarten to the 3rd grade I moved schools 4 times. When my family moved to the states I was in that same cycle of not knowing how to read. Remember sitting in my fourth grade class and being scared I would get picked on. But it was different people in my class helped me and didn’t make fun of me or bully me for not knowing how to read English. I think I recently mentioned how my 6th grade English teacher is the main reason I read so much today. I remember being in her class and always getting a new book to read. During 6th grade is when I stumbled upon wattpad…I am not proud of myself for reading stuff I wasn’t supposed to😩😞 I had no one to tell me what I was doing was wrong. I remember being so obsessed with wattpad the first story I ever read on there was the Lavery twins (IF ANYONE KNOWS IT I LOVE YOU). That was tame when I got into hs I started reading more and more filthy books. I remember my first ever creative assignment I had to do for ap lit I loved it so much. Being able to create something out of my imagination really touched something in me. At one point of my hs career I wanted to become a journalist lol. I think reading and getting to escape our reality for a while is something that relaxes me and I enjoy a lot.
How I got to tumblr…I first created tumblr back in 2017 for my exo fan account 😭 but didn’t know how to use it so I left it and came back in 2021. I came mainly for txt fics it was the same time I came across the fic hub and I joined it. The person I got inspiration from and made me actually wanna write my first fic was actually…you! Like I said you’ve been by my side through thick and thin and I can never thank you enough. I love writing and I love reading ive just taken a break from both in the last few weeks. But yeah that was a lot I’m so sorry 😩😩😩
Hi Angel!! It’s so cute how you found other Filipino moas on tumblr 🥺💕 The way you all found out because of yeonjun as well 🙈🙈🙈 Funny story after you told me today that you found other Filipino moas I got curious so I was like let me see if I can find any of my people as moas 😩 none I searched up on tumblr and Twitter and nothing came up so I replaced moas with kpop and found a few accounts that commented and I was like I FOUND MY PEOPLE….the latest comment was from 2021. I bet you were so excited 🥳🤭
my reply under the cut <3
aw angie :< that must've been difficult being on the move a lot esp when you were younger but I'm so glad your classmates helped you read english! I remember being on wattpad not for long because I lost touch with my kpop stan side from high-school to early college, and then uni got me back into it again bc I wanted to keep reading txt stuff.
omg wait :<< I'm super honoured that I inspired you enough to start writing, I remember actually talking you through just before you did, and then you did it!! I can certainly tell that you enjoy writing and that your imagination goes beyond you, so I'm honestly grateful you shared your story <3 may you find more inspiration to continue doing what you do bby, always gonna here to support you and help you out >3<
alsooo, yes! there's more filo moas than I thought! they're like hidden gems hehe, what were the chances a couple of them are my moots! 🤭 aw love, I'm sure regardless, all moas are lovely! it's just a little exciting when you find your people hehe
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komorisansgarden · 9 months
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i watched nimona for the first time the other day, and ive decided that yes, i will talk about it because how could I not.
i would touch on the art or the general plot, but honestly i need to talk about nimona herself first because wow did her character really resonate with me.
As someone who is queer, gnc and neurodivergent, i felt so represented by her and the way she’s treated. its no secret that there is a lot of queerphobia & ableism in the world, and theres an obvious parallel between how she’s treated and how real queer/nd people are treated irl, but i think theres so much more too.
I loved how Nimona just existed. She wasn’t afraid to run around outside and be a person. She walked through the streets, she interacted with people, she did people things. All of that made it so much more heartbreaking when you see the difference between how she’s treated before & after people find out she’s different. I felt that so much. Because I’ve been there. There have been times where I’ve had multiple, full, amicable conversations with people, and the second it comes up that I’m queer, they’ve become withdrawn. I’ve had a girl tell me “I’m just going to pretend I didn’t hear that” when I offhandedly mentioned I’m not straight. And it hurts so badly to see that shift in people around you when they find out you aren’t like them.
On top of that, I connected so deeply with the emotional turmoil she faces. Near the end, when she’s about to turn into the ‘shadow monster’ (not sure what else to call it), we can hear overlapping voices of people calling her a monster, or saying she’s unwanted. And a lot of it is Ballister, obviously, because of how close they’ve gotten, and he was the most recent rejection she’s faced. But something that I realized while watching is that (correct me if im wrong) I’m fairly certain most of what we hear coming from ‘him’ isnt actually things he’s said. As someone who’s had their fair share of mental breakdowns, it was so interesting to not only see a visual representation of what it feels like (the visuals were so stunning and hit really close to home), but also (possibly) a peak into what happens inside your head as well. There are lots of things that people have said floating around her mind, but also there are things that people haven’t- things that her mind has simply made up in a moment of complete chaos and turmoil.
Then, when she turns into the ‘beast’, we don’t really see much of her actively attacking. She’s mostly just walking forward towards the Gloreth statue- to the giant reminder of the person she loved most, who then hurt her most. We see her in an almost unresponsive state, only really reacting when she’s been hurt. And then she gets to the statue, and decides to give into the thing people want from her. I probably would have cried when we hear her thinking back to her comment of sometimes wanting to give into it, if it werent for the fact i was watching with my brothers. And speaking of that quote, I also felt that super deeply- not only the actual message, but the fact that it’s clear its not something she actively wants. It’s something that rings in her mind during really harsh moments, a silent urge to simply give in, and its scary. Its terrifying. And now, while shes in a nearly catatonic state, shes going to go through with it.
Im not sure how to wrap this up, because its currently midnight and this is basically my brain running through all the ways that i felt Nimona’s character in my soul, but,,, i suppose the take-away is that the movie is great and it did a great job at resonating with me in regards to mental illness and living in a world where people hate even the idea of your existence.
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ratabethchase · 2 years
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ten songs i love by different artists
omg thank you @existentialvoidofexistence for tagging me!! i was very close to reblogging your post just to be an asshole but you're lucky <3
Stand Tall from Julie and the Phantoms
I could listen to this song a million times and i would literally never stop going absolutely bonkers at it. I love it so so much dude i need to rewatch jatp
2. Hate Myself by dodie
just. such a good song. i struggled to pick a dodie song because i love all of them so much but this was the first to come to mind
3. Bad Reputation by Joan Jett
This is such a headbanger and i have been listening to it recently bc my band might do a cover of it which will be fun. i dont know if i can sing like joan jett though
4. That's Not My Name by The Ting Tings
i have no idea how i even found out about this song but it goes so hard .
5. Madison by Orla Gartland
madison is my proof to my irls that i listened to orla gartland before heartstopper because when i was writing my english creative piece i had it stuck in my head so i named the two characters madison and orla.
6. Waiting in the Wings from Rapunzel's Tangled Adventure
legit have not even seen this show. i just watched this animatic on youtube and i have been hooked on it ever since. it just makes me Feel Things.
7. Real Gone by Sheryl Crow
the song from cars. my brother has watched cars so much out loud that i have grown to love this song. my teacher also saw me listening to it once and got excited that i also liked sheryl crow
8. My Tennessee Mountain Home by Dolly Parton
omg showing off that broad music taste. country music gets so much slander and for what. i love this song so much.
9. 1985 by Bo Burnham
slaps.
10. Bright Lights Bigger City/Magic from Pitch Perfect
i am obsessed with pitch perfect. it is so misogynistic and so feminist at the same time.
honestly though. these are just the most recent songs ive listened to lol!
no pressure tags for some mutuals and some people i see in my notes quite often:
@yaznomarbles @woweejoeyrichter @wands-n-lillies @ironghostie @guyhusbands @franken-pigeon @hillerska-official @fluencca @an-odd-idea @wouldthehill @whyare-youlooking
@insanitysmiles @comradebacterium @auaddict @bluedragonbaby @coffeeflavoredtears525600 @cowboy-lesbian @darkarfs @murkat @brorphine @repetitive-tautology
jeez that was a lot more tags than i thought i would do but. yeah. do it or dont do it
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reading yaoi for the plot
recently i seemingly entirely stopped my life for a week to read the visual novel Slow Damage.
i dont really play vn’s (reading in front of my pc is HARD) nor do i read that much boys love (i am a bit of a gayboy by nature, so im not opposed to it) so what drove me to absolutely devour this one.....i honestly dont know. i would never have bought it for myself but my bestie gave it to me. so here we are.
slow damage is a game that you Could play. maybe should and maybe shouldnt. its sad and since it deals with self harm, suicidal thoughts, violence, sexual violence and rape, child abuse and just about every other bad thing you can imagine.......... man that shit can be depressing as hell. and since its a eroge, they are out there sexualizing shit they really SHOULDNT.
AND I HATE IT!!!!!!!!!!! all those “fiction doesnt affect reality” talk some people do is bs in my opinion. yes, you probably wouldnt hurt people irl bc youre reading this rape scene. but YES, bad porn will still condition your brain negatively in the long run.
anyhow. slow damage is pretty damn self-aware. dont get me wrong man, i love the game so much. and yet, and yet.
its so deeply important to me how the game really pictures.... unconditional love between friends and multiple different endgames that finish the story Well for the protag. he can attain salvation and peace. whether it means never touching the wounds of his past or confronting it headfirst. either way he can go through the worst of the worst and end up better. or worse. its all so fickle but thats the good part right. mental health is very sensitive and as a chronically sick person, he is so so vulnerable. (not madarame. fuck everything to do with him. i think theres a storytelling and character study merit to his ends as well but this paragraph wasnt about them)
ive been thinking about talking about it but theres probably people who have. better more informed takes than i do. here are my 2 cents anyway
id love to talk about the ludonarrative dissonance that is a yaoi game with rape scenes taking a stance against rape
im also really intrigued by the setting; a very desensitized city with desensitized people, which we are supposed to see as sad, yet a lot of scenes are there for shock value
CAN WE TALK ABOUT GENDER. WHY IS SLOW DAMAGE SO FILLED WITH GENDER. ITS EVEN GOOD WITH GENDER. I LOVE THE AMOUNT OF GENDER IDENTITY TALK!!!!! WE LOVE TO SEE CIS PEOPLE TALK ABOUT GENDER. WE LOVE NORMALIZED DYSPHORIA TALK. BUT ALSO I LOVE HOW SENSITIVE THE TRANSLATION WAS ABOUT ITS TRANSFEM/GNC CHARACTERS
the fact that the game has an Entire big arc about gaslighting and an abusive relationship, that makes the protag really really internalize selfhate and doubt and makes that mindset smth that he wears like a protective “its just us two against the world” shield. its so sad yet so close to life
the protag, though horribly abused and traumatized, has the advantage of having a very functional very very loving support system in the form of his two best friends, one of which happens to be a doctor. can you imagine how much worse this could be. im constantly aware of it
thinking a lot about how much class plays a role in the last route and towa and fujieda only start to get along once their perceived differences are lifted, in fact them being “the same” is of fundamental importance - but also undermines how unbridgable their differences would have been otherwise
deeply in love with the fact fujieda, as someone who studied law and has been dealing with courts professionally, is this huge vigilante. bc he doesnt trust justice to happen unless he does it himself. and towa is important to him, but ultimately his own goals are just a bit more important than towas comfort. i love when characters have spines <3
on a related note, i also love when characters dont have spines. taku is literally my fav. the fact hes a human sanctuary contrasts so beautifully with him withholding vital info, constantly telling white lies, being conflicted about Everything, but eventually going to jail bc he thinks he Deserves it
how and why is eiji a metal gear solid character stuck in a pokemon characters body
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dramamines · 8 months
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TW Vent below, mentions of SH
ugh ive never vented here and im not planning on making it a regular thing, but i recently had to delete discord so im gonna be talking into the void abt this instead. last night i had to take melatonin to sleep for the first time in ages, and read my book for an hour to calm the anxiety i was having. my mum went through my phone (she does respect my privacy, so she wasn't reading messages or looking through my pinterest, just checking what apps i had downloaded and the screentime has done today). she did find some tumblr screentime, not a large enough amount for her to think i use it regularly, and i made up a lie on the spot that saved me. she's become rlly paranoid abt my internet usage again bc she just had a cybersafety talk at school (shes a teacher) and was told horror stories abt online murders and child p0rn exploitation and shit. she kept asking me if i talk to strangers online, which i do, and how she wouldnt be mad or surprised, but just wants me to be safe. i kept lying bc i was too scared to tell her, and am sure that ill be made to get off tumblr and abandon all my online friends. i just dont think she would understand the benefits of it, even if i told her, and is too scared of me getting hurt, despite that fact that i AM safe on here and block weirdos and dont share personal info. if i didnt have tumblr i wouldnt have gotten in to lots of my favourite fandoms, wouldnt have continued doing art, and until now, ive been much happier being online. she would never let me get tumblr, its listed as a 17+ app on the app store, and she's too scared to allow me anything remotely online, pinterest and yt are as far as she'll go. i know it wouldnt put me in danger if i told her, i would be in more trouble if she found out, cause then i would have been lying to her, but i dont want to lose what ive created. im just so angry at myself for getting into and online community, bc despite loving it and knowing that i wouldnt be as into art or happy, its causing me so much anxiety rn, and i just want to hurt myself for being so stupid. last night i didnt SH, but i wanted to, because i was so angry with myself. ive never SH'd before, and i dont want to start, but i should have known better. my parents both have such high expectations of me, and think they've 'won the lottery with their perfect daughter, who would never do anything wrong or do anything her parents didnt approve of'. i just dont want them to be disappointed in me, bc im sure they would, and they claim nothing i do can surprise them, but i honestly have no clue how they would react if i told them everything. i hope that in a few days my mum will go back to normal and stop being so paranoid abt the internet, but im honestly terrified, and have been feeling anxious since last night. the problem is if i told her how anxious i was feeling, and the reasoning behind it, she would blame it on me being on social media, and i wouldnt be allowed it ever again. im not going to tell her anything unless it gets rlly bad or she finds out, but im just so angry with myself, and i dont think i deserve to be feeling this way bc i have an essentially perfect irl life. i get good grades, i have good friends, i live in a good neighborhoood, and my parents arent bad peole, theyre not conservative, and it wouldnt be the end of the world if i told them, but im not ready to give it all up yet.
if you read this far, im sorry, i was just rambling theres no sense in what i said, this is just an outlet for me
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roseriot2191 · 8 months
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Entry 1/Introductions
hey!
so i really havent used tumblr before really so im not sure if this is the best place for what im doing but regardless im posting it here
~welcome to my blog~
the purpose is to document my life as a whole but its also my senior year so even more reason to record it!
this blog will be my safe space to spill anything, the good and the bad, of my upcoming life. in all honesty im not sure how well ill keep up with posts or how much effort ill end up putting into them but i will try to update at least once a week for sure.
ok so now onto me :)
hello again! im rose, i use he/they pronouns and i am 17. for anyone wonder, which i dont know why but i guess i can just state it to get it out of the way, im a cis queer guy. i use queer as my label because i very much dislike labels for myself lmao. im attracted to men way more often than not but if the right person for me isnt a guy the im not going to let gender/sex get in the way of love and im not sure pansexual really fits the way i feel. queerness ill say is a part of me but not something i identify with as much as i did in middle school. ill make a separate post about this perhaps. (ill mention that my name isnt actually rose irl and its just my pen name for the blog. i have no reason to be secretive really besides to hide my identity from friends, family and people who think they might know me, especially with the topics i might write about, but also i didnt put too much effort into disconnection rose and myself so if youre one of my irl friends, hi :p ) i am a high school student, but i am mostly taking college classes at a community college. im a photo major! photography is a recent thing that i started basically the same time i started college. i sorta took a leap into photo classes and decided that i might as well major in it since ive always been a creative person and since my high school was paying for my tuition. honestly college has been really fun but its school and sometimes i get burnt out really easily which sucks. ill probably talk about this more some other time. i havent really decided on a style of photography that i prefer yet but this fall ill start a portraiture lighting class as well as a color theory class, both im really excited for.
recently ive found myself changing or perhaps growing into a more typical "teenager" recently. this growth is a drastic change from who i was as a kid and that sort of scares me but i think i like the idea of who i can become. i started taking an interest in cars which sort of came out of know where. it might be because i got my license last december and have been driving a lot more but its also rooted in my ex too. (at the begging of this summer i got into a relationship with this guy who was my first everything, and we also ended it in july which hurt hella but again this is a topic for another post later) he was a total car guy and it was something we were bonding over. he would teach/talk about cars and i listened and started to take an actual interest. we went to a few car shows and it was honestly a prefect date/hangout for us because he liked cars of course but i also got to bring my camera and take photos. definitely something i miss doing. my first car was a 2004 honda pilot. it was a manual and i tried learning how to drive it and i got the gist but ended up selling it and getting an automatic 2006 honda pilot lol. this car ive had since february and its lowkey dying now which pisses me. my grandpa was the one who ended up buying it for me which i appreciate very much dont get me wrong but he bought it off these sketchy guys and didnt get it checked out right away for any problems and now im paying extra money in repairs. currently im trying to save for something more "extra" like a mustang or a bmw or honestly an older honda like a prelude or accord, though on my salary as a host in a small restaurant i have barely $4.5k saved and i started work about the same time i got the 06 pilot. i know these cars are a bit on the pricey side but im giving myself till new years to save for something and if i dont find anything by then, ill keep my money in savings for college after i graduate. (that is with the hopes my 06 pilot lasts me through that long :,) )
so yeah. i work as a host at a restaurant. its my first job and i honestly really like it. i get paid $16.50 an hour and i get tipped out by the waitresses on top of that. on average i make about $500 in a pay period which is two weeks. i wish i had more hours but also i dont. i usually use work as an excuse to procrastinate or completely ignore school work which is really self destructive because i convince myself that im productive but in reality i need to be more focused on school. my work ethic is pretty good though i think. i always say yes if someone needs a cover or if i need to come in ealry/on a day off. after the break up i took a bunch of extra shifts and started taking caterings for longer hours and to keep me busy. in the past 2 pay periods i clocked about 50 hours each and made $850 each. this has again been really nice for savings but not for my summer classes. this pay period i had a double catering and i should clock in about 40 ish hours. ill have one more pay period after this one before i will talk to my manager about scheduling me only friday-sunday and see about scheduling me caterings more rather than hosting since i make more that way. theyre pretty good about accommodating hours/days which is really cool but my manager always complains. i feel bad but also i really shouldnt because i need to do better in school first and i already do so much more than what i get paid for honestly so she really doesnt have any reason to say anything. (especially since we just hired 3 new girls after the summer hires left) all my coworkers love me but also everyone shit talks eachother behind their backs so i always wonder if they say anything about me lol. if they are then they should put that energy somewhere else because how are you guys gonna shit talk a 17 year old when you all are 25+???
my music taste is the opposite in regards to changing drastically. i find myself returning to the music i grew up with and even expanding with similar artists. for a quick family overview my step dad who raised me since i was three was/is a tattoo artist and very much in the punk scene. my mom was in the artistic performance and alternative scene. both these adults raised a very punk baby with all the classics and now like i said, after not really interested or listening to music often for awhile, im back to my roots. this is very comforting however when me and my ex were dating he was a big influence in the reintroduction. so do i corrilate some music to him? yes. does it hurt? im not sure. its very confusing but i listen to it on blast regardless and will most likely have hearing problems by the time im 30 T~T a lot of what ive been listening to on repeat is radiohead which was "our band" and i still think it is. im a very sentimental person and cant/wont diconnect these feelings probably ever. i do this a lot. this time though i havent had the urge to stop listening which is a reliefe because i enjoy the music but also because i think itd hurt me if i found hate or sadness in the music rather than the love and bond we once shared through these songs. something ive been considering is posting a song with every post or at the very least at the end of the week. maybe even a playlist at the end of the month? not sure yet. i think music tatse is something that changes with me all the time so its something worth recording here. oh also i def will post cd hauls here too! i have a small collection started but definetely wanna get more.
lets see i dont read often but my favorite books are alice in wonderland, the warden's daughter, they both die at the end, coraline and currently i am reading solitaire by alice oseman. ive read her heartstopper series and have taken a serious interest in tori's story. for my favorite shows i binge watch shows so often and then forget about them just as fast as i watch them lol. i really like soul eater, downtown, daria, the midnight gospel, the walking dead, initial d, madoka magica, and some others i cant think of right now.
hmm~ i cant really think about anything else to write at the moment, plus ive been typing for awhile and should get to bed, so i think ill end it here.
i dont really expect anyone to read this blog in all honesty but its something i wanna do for myself and if a few people take interest or relate to anything i talk about i think thats enough :)
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agirldying · 2 years
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*Possible Tw for mentions of abuse and Sa, adding a warning just in case*
Hey Bun,
I wanted to talk to you or I guess maybe ask for your opinion on this. Do you think it's possible I'm actually going backwards in my healing?
It's a weird question but I will give you some background. I know you're probably familiar with my situation and a few weeks ago we had like a big response as to what my abuse actually was. After that I felt like I could really start accepting it because you gave me a name for it and that helped honestly to realize how serious what happened to me was.
For a few weeks I felt like I was dealing with the grief well and like actually addressing my feelings about it. I really felt like I was healing like a little bit. But now over the last two weeks I've been starting to like avoid it if that makes any sense.
Like I recently got a new job and im moving this week into a new apartment and I've just been like ignoring any thoughts I have about it. It's almost like I'm pretending it didn't happen. Like I don't want to call myself a survivor now. I don't want to admit I was abused. I don't want to think about getting hit. I don't want to call it trafficking. I don't want to think about what happened.
It's almost like when Ive been having flashbacks since I started working two weeks ago I see them and my brain is like "that's not me" like they aren't my memories and it didn't happen to me. It's like I'm trying to tell myself that it happened to someone else and that's not me. What is this?
I guess I'm just asking like is this regression in my healing? Is my personality splitting? Could I be dissociating from it because it's just too much for me to function normally? Honestly and truly I'm not sure what is happening.
It's just so strange because sometimes I will feel the anger or the pain or feel upset when I have the flashbacks and it's like I acknowledge the feeling and my brain just turns it off immediately, then I have those " it's not me" thoughts.
Sorry if this is a lot or if it's very confusing but I feel like something strange is going on and I don't really understand it so I was just wondering what you think about it.
Thank you so much for reading and as always I appreciate you so much Bun.
- DW 🍂
Hi DW 🍂,
Healing isn't linear, so it's expected to have some backwards steps.
It makes sense why you may be avoiding confronting your trauma and current situation because they're quite daunting and come with a lot of emotional... I don't want to use the word baggage but maybe weight? They're hard things to come to terms with so it's understandable why it can be hard to constantly accept.
It sounds like there are various changes in your life that perhaps make it easier to feel like you can put your experiences in the past and store it away like it didn't happen, even though it hasn't been completely processed.
Personally I feel this connecting with the year after I'd gotten out of my abusive situation - I went from long hair to short (cut off 10 inches of hair or so) and donated it. I remember the new look being this sort of pathway to feeling like I could pretend to be an entirely new person, free of trauma, unburdened (that being said I also remember having like 10 anxiety attacks in that month alone).
I also need to just say that I completely relate to almost othering yourself and being like "the person who endured that is not me". Personally I recognize that to be a dissociative symptom as I actively believe that I am a completely separate person from the girl who once inhabited this body (see my username). I have actually changed my name irl to reflect the fact that I am someone else now, and my deadname is triggering knowing what happened to her. Basically I'm saying all of this to kind of just show that this is just another way that dissociation can present, and this is one of the many elements of dissociative identity. Like, I will use first person when talking about the trauma, but that's more for convenience than actually identifying with those memories.
So yeah ultimately this sounds like some dissociation is coming up for you surrounding your sense of self and identity as you're navigating recovery.
I hope I could help and provide some insight. As you know, please feel free to send more asks my way if you need to chat or if you want to add onto this.
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lostacelonnie · 10 months
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Cant believe a solution like that has existed for so long they make pills of all sorts these days thats wild. Glad they're helpful for you really. Just standing in the ocean sometimes is such an experience i love it. Oh gosh that must be some kind of interesting. I had a sub once who was like. One of the few teachers to ever pronounce my last name right without help because her husband or herself was german. Or somethin like that. Shocked me at the time. Oh that'll be fun sometimes its neat to like. Go back to a place & see whats the same & whats changed since you were there. I wanna visit spain so much just uh. Probably in a less hot time of year. I like jarilo-vi so far only just hit level 15 so i can continue story. Didnt get bronya off my intro pulls got clara instead but i will someday. Is cocolia in honkai too? Yeah i agree this feels like they fixed genshin in a different game but im alright with that. Yeehaw more sleep. Ive been getting more now that i dont have to be at work at like 6 every day too. I would love to hear about this fire
right like!!!! waow. i ❤ you modern medicine i ❤ you medication. and for REAL !! i dont do it a lot and then i suddenly remember how nice it is. YEAH it took a while for me to actually be Able To Communicate with all of them but yknow it gets much easier when youre literally forced to do it to understand anything. but i have to say my spoken spanish is waaaaay worse than what i understand. oh well. god i feel that esp recently since ive been going outside of poland recently..... not a SINGLE non polish person can say my last name right. but i dont blame them shdfjgkjskf polish is a hellish language for foreigners. and yeah im looking forward to it honestly!! esp since ill actually get to interact with ppl more this time around. exciting! yes id recommend that you dont go in spring or summer bc not only is it hot theres also a looooot of tourists. tho i heard the weather isnt as bad in the northern part. and ah nice!! im a big grinder and hit lvl50 yesterday [not doing trial of the equilibrium yet tho..... Scared] but have fun!!! oh i main clara and shes actually SO good oh my god. actual killing machine esp in simulated universe with elation blessings [i run her with march + tingyun + bailu btw] so i totally rec you invest in her. good luck in your bronya acquiring quest btw o7 im also trying to do it but i dont really pull on standard outside of free pulls so its gonna. take a While. and yes she is!!!!! god frfr but i dont care about genshin that much so im not even mad. and ah thats nice!! oh the fire god that was. Hm. basically i was chilling as one does and an irl friend was like "my guy What. is happening at your house" and before that there was this reaaaaaaaally loud firetruck siren [that i decided to completely ignore] so i went outside bc that friend came over and there were?? firemen with a giant fan blowing out smoke out of one of the stairwells in my block of flats?? and basically it turns out some guy set something in the basement on fire and since i live in a block from the Communism Times the ventilation system sucks so the whole block smelled like smoke. also there was a dumpster fire nearby like an hour later. so thats fun! luckily nothing serious happened in either cases bc they were both noticed quickly but its still. Interesting.
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bmpmp3 · 2 years
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Do you have any tips for drawing bodies from multiple angles?
WROTE A LOT SORRY its under a cut!
honestly i dont have the most practice with it since a good 70% of what i draw is characters wait up standing looking 3/4s left or right orz BUT some things that helped with the few interesting poses i draw once every fiscal quarter IS.....life drawing orz
specifically life drawing sessions where you do a bunch of quick gestural figures (like a 60 second timer each pose) at the beginning and then slowly increase the time for later poses, like 2 minutes, then five, where you slowly increase the amount of detail and rendering each pose, and then one or two long 10 minute ones where you go all out. i think that kinda structure helps a lot to 1) warm you up and get loosey goosey with ur lines and 2) get in the zone to think about how bodies work without overwhelming urself - like in the 1 minute sketches you could basically only get a weird stick figure, in the 2 minute ones maybe you might get a little more definition in the sillhouette, at the 5 minute poses you got some folds of the flesh implied with a few lines and a bit of hatching, and by the 10 minute ones ur really thinking about how the different parts of the body all interact because you already did some practice (the previous poses) if that makes sense?
ALAS we are in a world situation where cramming 40 people in a room to silently draw one naked person for three hours is not......happening (at least not where i live) so for the past couple years ive had to make do with online resources, which arent half bad! theyre not quite the same, for me at least (i think in person i can see more interesting angles) but they do the job! here's some I've used:
http://reference.sketchdaily.net/en
https://line-of-action.com/practice-tools/figure-drawing
https://quickposes.com/en
https://youtu.be/mNNSwITdPIM (linking this channels clothed references so no one gets a surprise titty in the face but normally i personally use nude references) (although recently ive been using some clothed references as well just because i realized im so out of practice drawing clothes hsjlkfBJKLFJSFKLD)
figure drawing and life drawing and especially gesture drawing is also something thats kinda tricky to learn if no one ever taught you (and honestly its tricky if someone DID teach you lol) so maybe someday i'll get around to trying to explain what ive learned myself if that could help someone
ive tried using 3d models but ive never foudn them that useful, probably for the same reason i prefer irl models to pictures (easier to see whats goin on) BUT sometimes it can help as a rough guideline if ur doing a weird angle youve never done before!!
SPEAKING of guidelines. guidelines are ur friend. guidelines r ur lifeblood. guidelines will always help even if u dont follow half of them they are SO helpful - I OFTEN find myself kinda skipping them, like you can see here in this drawing i havent erased the sketch from yet that i drew a circle and then a line for shoulders and gave up (probably impatient lol):
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BUT guidelines can help so much~ when im drawing a full pose i'll usually have guidelines that really are no more than stick figures like basically like:
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stick figures with dots for joints and maybe some rough lines here and there like it doesnt need to be nice or perfect since its just gonna get erased anyway~ it helps me keep track of how bones work hjfsdskjvfdfs
OH and artist mannequins.....like 3d models theyve also never done me any good like those wooden ones? I hate em theyre so stiff and i dunno what to do with them BUT.....okay...action figures? not bad....like maybe not so much with anatomy but if you have a doll or action figure with good articulation you can kinda use that to help out with funky poses sometimes!! like i have this one gundam and honestly....even though its a mecha with a giant mecha dong or whatevers going down there its like....not a horrible mannequin for poses jfksdlfjrfkehjklsd
WITH REGARDS TO foreshortening.......................................we are all on our own with that one orz LIKE i have tried every trick in the book, every funky tip and method and technique and none have worked for me so i just wing it jhkDmFJKDLS WELL actually having like a page of really sloppy loose stick figure sketches where you experiment with proportions helps a lot!! i do that with weird poses or angles, like dont worry about about how it looks HELL unfocus ur eyes. unfocus ur eyes. i do that all the time while drawing and its great it helps you see the big picture and the silhouette without focusing too much on one thing~
anyway yeah i dunno i guess a lot is just experimentation but hopefully some of these resources might be useful!!
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batarangsoundsdumb · 3 years
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hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .
if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation
Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh
this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.
Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 
i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho
speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible
tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 
Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏
how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???
'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 
about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.
you are the only funny person on this hellsite
how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.
Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)
check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)
dick grayson but he's nicki minaj
his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 
Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol
you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link
...
why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.
Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery
ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.
i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD
THANK YOU
bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.
people tend to do it in the bathtub.
WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns
i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think
lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.
if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk
i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.
saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3
literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.
I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.
fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)
It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece
OH my god dude lmao
there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more
it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )
i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)
shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.
Wait, hear me out
Bernothy @redlightofdawn
great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname
Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?
Wait no, I regret sending that ask
these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.
crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-
WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY
Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol
she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.
Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god
lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.
Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like
send to me or lose a toe
🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋
thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/
⬆️
This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.
Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 
fanksss also lmao.
That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but
There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?
oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.
"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure
yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.
I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!
haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.
Doot doot!
noot noot
I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me
lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.
sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"
lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 
(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”
yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.
so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side
i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’
ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.
wow. the IMPACT.
Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝
this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.
Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.
May I ask where your username originates from?
yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.
yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim
no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 
How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited
fenomenal next question.
Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that
(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)
i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts
You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel
you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.
Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 
he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.
Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.
lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy
stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀
oh yes it is my darling.
did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily
no he did it bc fuck the french.
im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist
okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.
your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue
i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.
suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩
sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.
Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit
yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW
Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics
clark reads smut confirmeeed
NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector
that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.
One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy
literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.
superfam and batfam associations??
-batman and superman
-dick/barabara and supergirl?
-conner and tim
-jon and damian
pls enlighten me I am confused
nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl
I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)
sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.
good human what are your pronouns?
wouldn’t you like to know?
I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes
everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont
don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily
dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants
Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.
damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo
Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨
stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!
All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 
batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.
I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this
vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.
seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go
emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet
People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.
dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME
dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet
all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise
bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves
thoughts on teen titans and young justice
haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!
ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them
log off tumblr?
Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc
huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.
I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something
fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.
lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 
unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right
why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf
idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)
There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.
all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you
is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa
no. find her as owa owa as you want.
aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:
1. tim
2. Steph
3. dick
4. Duke
5. the rest
you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED
oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs
i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.
dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.
super random but
jason 🤝 damian
old english
lmao fair enough.
tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.
yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.
I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.
i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.
so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?
no. dunkin donuts all the way
One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker
now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao
my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context
bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.
crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown
SO CRAZY HUH?
batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink
absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.
unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator
dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.
When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution
bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.
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