I didn't really like my drawing, but the episode was too good for me not to post anything, so here it is and I hope y'all like it more than me.
I cried like a baby.
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Still thinking about Frank and Bill and it occurred to me that an apocalypse is the only time Bill even felt he could allow himself to be gay.
He’s a prepper - a survivalist, someone steeped in a ‘macho’ culture where being gay would be looked down on, rejected, even got him killed.
I wonder - when he dreamed of the oncoming apocalypse, the one he spent all his life preparing for, did he also dream of perhaps meeting someone? Of a man coming out of a forest? A man who would appreciate his cooking skills and piano playing (not the kind of skill the men who knew Bill would appreciate. Too sissy). At night, lying in bed, listening to his neighbours, did he allow himself to dream of a world where he could be alone, live as he liked, not be judged or condemned? And perhaps - someone he could love, who would love him - but that was asking too much.
And then he found himself alone, and free to do what he liked, and run his world as he wished, and drink fine wine with rabbit and listen to soft country music. And he thinks that’s enough, that all he can ask for.
And then the alarm sounds and he goes to the hole on the ground and sees Frank standing there and he allows himself to think ‘oh. There you are’
And the world has fallen apart and the air stinks of death and he has to fight to protect his life but finally - finally the world has changed into one on which Bill can fall in love with Frank with all his soul.
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