Klaus: I just think if we melted both of the Bens down into one large Ben-
Luther: like the clock in Paris?
Allison: no that’s Big Ben he said large ben
Diego: big ben is in London not Paris
Five: Ben is in Paris???
Klaus: he just said he’s in London five
Five: Ben is in London??
Viktor: *head in hands* can we please
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Umbrella Academy season three spoilers
Don't know if anyone's talked about this, but Hargeeves' both strict and ambivalent nature towards the kids in the season one flashbacks makes sense once you consider they could no longer help him with his Project Oblivion plans. First they lost Ben, then Five. He was dulling Viktor's powers, so would he have even survived the guardians to make it to the symbols? Was he making plans to find the other children? Or did he just see the end of the world as a sign of his complete and utter failure? And Luther, on the moon, was he going to come down and be part of Project Oblivion if it was completed? Or did he really send him there out of guilt and shame, placating himself by claiming in his own mind that it was for his wife? It really cracks Reggie open in a way I find fun.
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Ecstasy Of The Heart
masterlist
pairing: five hargreeves x any gender reader
warnings: fluff, sarcastic five, cursing
summary: you and five quarling like an old married couple while shopping
a/n: harry potter poa reference in the summary ;) there's also a full house (my fav show ever) reference somewhere
song: tainted love - soft cell
"No, we are getting the chocolate ones," Five rolls his eyes.
"Uh- no we aren't? We are getting mint ones," you argue back.
"There is something wrong with you, nobody likes mint oreos," he tells you with disgust in his voice, pinching the bridge of his nose.
"That's not true, you just lack enough social interaction to know that," you huff.
"Well, everyone at the academy agreed on chocolate," he reminds you.
"Okay, that was before I saw those delicious mint ones-"
"'Delicious mint ones my ass. You might as well just take the cookie part off of a regular one and put toothpaste on it"
"I'm done with this, we are getting both- problem solved," you say placing both in the cart.
"What ingredients did Klaus say he needed," you wonder aloud.
"We are not getting Klaus anything," Five tries to steal the cart from you.
"What do you mean? He told me to get him ingredients so we can make a cake together," you tell him.
"Klaus can't bake"
"You can't space jump without getting stuck in the future either," you cross your arms.
His jaw drops and he glares at you.
"At least I'm not best friends with someone who's high all the time," he says.
"I happen to enjoy his highness, he makes everything less... serious," you look him up and down.
"Whatever, just get everything on the shelf for all I care," Five gives up.
"Can we get a dog," you ask while strolling through the isle with pet food and supplies.
"Absolutely not"
"But why, do you think I can't take care of one?"
"Yes, in fact I do think that"
"I would make a great parent, for your information"
"Oh really? The last time we had a pet you gave the fish a bath-"
"He needed to be cleaned"
"-with soap!"
You shake your head looking up and mutter a 'rest in peace Mr. Goldfish'.
You two finally made it back to the academy to see Allison and Luther waiting in the kitchen.
Luther looks at Allison, "I'm surprised, they made it back without killing each other!"
The two of you glance at each other, "barely," you say in sync with him.
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