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#mod oatmeal
urfavhasnoass · 1 year
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Clotted Cream Cookie from Cookie Run Kingdom has absolutely NO ass he is a biscuit.
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Note
Ford missed Dino eggs oatmeal.
Thing Ford Missed #235: Dinosaur Eggs Oatmeal
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help thats a thing?
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Toku the Hokun is BANNED from the daycare for DECEIVING the Fab Four!
(submitted by verae !)
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aaravos-answers · 9 months
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Is there something (non magical) that you cant do? Like I can't talk without sounding like a female chipmunk and cant cook either
I would assume you can cook-- if you couldn't I honestly would be concerned
My darling Loki believes I cannot sing. I've spent my efforts elsewhere, but I do not believe I am terrible at it.
I can cook, but my repertoire is... more limited than my spellbook.
Nor am I a skilled artist.
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octoooo · 6 months
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I think I’m addicted to oatmeal raisin cookies
They just
SO GOOD
Everytime they have these cookies in the cafeteria I make sure to get a takeout case of at least 6. (Today I got 12)
All of which I eat in one night HD JXMS
First it was peppermint sticks, now it’s oatmeal raisin
.
Anyway I’m drawing pokemon today >:) and I’ve got cookies to accompany me
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twinsimming · 10 months
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Breakfast At Twinsimming’s by Twinsimming 🥞
This mod adds six new breakfast recipes converted from The Sims 4, along with one new custom Avocado harvestable, and one new custom Butter ingredient!
The recipes, harvestable, and ingredient can all be placed in your Packages folder. They were created and tested on 1.69, but should work fine on 1.67.
(Yes, the title is a play on Breakfast At Tiffany’s, and no, I have not seen the movie lol)
Requirements
This mod requires CCLoader to function.
Overview
New Recipes
Avocado Harvestable
Butter Ingredient
New Recipes
All of the recipes are breakfast themed, but they’re enabled to be prepared at any time of day. They are also all Vegetarian safe!
Cooking Overhaul mods make the recipes require more ingredients, but they are not required to use this mod. Cooking Overhaul ingredients will have an (*) symbol next to them. From left to right in the preview photo:
*Edit: Cooking Overhaul mods are required for this version of the mod. If you do not have one, please download the [No Cooking Overhaul] version now included in the latest update.
Baleada (Level 2): Cheese, Egg, and Avocado
Fruit Salad (Level 0, under Dessert): Any Fruit x3
Avocado Toast (Level 0): *Bread, Avocado, and Butter
Eggs Benedict (Level 6, requires recipe book): Egg, Butter, and *Milk
Oatmeal (Level 0): Any Fruit, *Milk, and *Granola
Eggs and Toast (Level 0): Egg, *Bread, and Butter
Avocado Harvestable
The Avocado harvestable is a conversion from The Sims 4: Jungle Adventure. It can be bought at the grocery store for §6 or planted and grown at Level 6 of the Gardening skill.
Note: There is no auto soil for the Avocado tree at this time. Hopefully I can find a working tutorial and make this a reality in the future!
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Butter Ingredient
Butter is a new, non-plantable ingredient that can be purchased at the grocery store for §5. It can also be made using my Pasteurize Milk Mod.
If you have my Pasteurize Milk Mod already installed, you do not need the Butter file included with these recipes as it is the same ingredient as the one included in that mod.
Note: This Butter ingredient is different from the one included in icemunmun’s Baker's Basket Plants, Ingredients and Recipes mod, so both can be installed at the same time.
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Conflicts & Known Issues
This is a new script mod so there shouldn’t be any conflicts.
Credits
EA/Maxis for The Sims 3 and The Sims 4, Blender, s3pe, TSRW, Gimp, Milkshape, Notepad++, and CCLoader.
Thank You
A special thank you to @bietjie, @echoweaver, @zoeoe-sims, @simsdeogloria, @omedapixel, and @puffkins2000​!
If you like my work, please consider tipping me on Ko-fi 💙
Download @ ModTheSims
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somik-severinka · 2 years
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Delivery - HEALTHY FOOD
What is included mod:
Basic game
Home delivery
19 different mega-healthy dishes for breakfast, lunch and dinner
5 types of smoothies from berries and fruits for a snack
All food has a negative calorie content and develops a healthy lifestyle
A specially designed system of 7 ready-made meal kits for every day of the week
You can choose your own diets for vegetarians or sims with lactose intolerance, thanks to convenient sorting in the order menu and an expanded description of each dish
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DOWNLOAD ON PATREON
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Diet for every day
If the program is followed, you can get rid of 3-5 extra kilograms in a week. If you want a more tangible and quick effect- connect sports, for example, jogging in the morning
If the sim does not need to lose weight, but only to maintain weight, you can add to the diet or replace part of the "normal" food or drinks with calories
Monday👇
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Breakfast Omelet with Spinach and fresh Cucumbers
Lunch Steamed Salmon and fresh Vegetables
Dinner Salad of Peppers and string Beans
Snack Smoothie with Banana
Tuesday👇
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Breakfast Oatmeal Porridge with Berries and Nuts
Lunch Grilled Steak and baked Red Pepper
Dinner Greek Salad
Snack Smoothie with Blueberry
Wednesday👇
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Breakfast Fruit Salad with Strawberries
Lunch Bean and Vegetable Soup
Dinner Vegetable Salad with Chicken and Oranges
Snack Smoothie with Kiwi
Thursday👇
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Breakfast Omelet with Vegetables and Grilled Zucchini
Lunch Grilled Tilapia and steamed Vegetables
Dinner Greek Salad
Snack Smoothie with Raspberry
Friday👇
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Breakfast Millet Porridge with Nuts
Lunch Meat Stew in tomato sauce and steamed Broccoli
Dinner Pumpkin Soup-puree with Seeds
Snack Smoothie with Strawberry
Saturday👇
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Breakfast Omelet with Spinach and fresh Cucumbers
Lunch Broccoli Soup-puree
Dinner Fish Salad with Carrots and Peas
Snack Smoothie with Kiwi
Sunday👇
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Breakfast Barley Porridge with Blueberries
Lunch Chicken stewed with Beans and Green Salad
Dinner Mushroom Soup-puree
Snack Smoothie with Raspberry
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Compatibility
The mod is compatible with any other mods and deliveries by other authors
DOWNLOAD ON PATREON
🕓🔻
Early Access "Patron of S&S+Bonus" October 20
Early Access "Patron of S&S" on October 27
🔓Public release on November 9
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emwheezie · 3 months
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Who are you choosing if my characters were in a dating sim?
Lennon:
Gremlin mode
Daddy issues
Bad hair
Musical/Creative genius. Perfect pitch
Ambitious
Doesn't shower
Ate a lasagna once
Doesn't know how to use his words
Fights drywall
Movie watcher
Chicken addiction
Street smart
Closeted Weezer fan
Dunkin Donuts
Shoes on the bed
Green Day
Might be silly
Goes up the stairs on all fours
Stressed/depressed/poorly dressed
PBC singer and lead guitar
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Tony:
Purple
Crazy driver
:3
Mall pretzels
Catholic school survivor
Emotionally smart/book smart
Stressed/depressed/dressed to impress
Afraid of getting old/ugly
Wants to fight the MBTA
Might be delusional
throws up from anxiety
Redbull and Taco Bell
Loves dogs
Green Day
Poetic
Saw Moses (biblical) in the woods while high with Theo
Bisexual
Lactose intolerant
Finds meaning in everything
Always in a relationship
PBC bassist and "manager"
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Enzo:
Evil
Might have killed a man
Man Bun
Posts on DeviantART
Loves dragons
whispers and shakes
Future tattoo artist
Movie connoisseur
Might be a furry...?
LOVES the Saw movie franchise
Protective and loyal
Street smart
Stays up all night in the dark
In an online relationship
Does what he wants
Doesn't waste time
Sparkling water enjoyer
Tea drinker
Never listened to a music in his life
Guitarist in a band (PBC)
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Theo:
From New Hampshire
Asexual
Golden retriever personality 
Grew up with 8 siblings
Joined the military after High School
Eats Oatmeal?
Doesn't wear a seatbelt
Outdoorsy/hiking adventures
Works at a club/bar with his wife, Gia
Is a cinnamon roll
Emotionally smart
Saw Moses (biblical) in the woods while high with Tony
Calls music his "funky jams"
Forgets his shoes
Mtn Dew
Forgetful
Kidney Stones
His appendix exploded once
PBC drummer
---------------------------------------------
Park:
Loves alcohol
Hates the government
Hates the IRS
Has never paid taxes
No sense of personal space/very touchy
LOUD
Climbs things
Grilled cheese enthusiast  
Dunkin Donuts manager
Aliens are 4 realz
loves video games
Wicked smart
Goes to MIT for like space engineering or something idk
Makes monkey noises
"I have to be both the sexiest and most mentally challenged person in the room at all times"
Obsessed with skin walkers
Conspiracy theories
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Oli:
Photography/cinematography 
Graphic design
Urban Explorer
Abandoned things
Summer time vibes
Lives in sleeveless shirts
Black coffee drinker
health freak/gym rat
Smokes cigarettes (hey we all have our vices)
Secretly gay
Chronic complainer
Works at zumies
Does graffiti 
Runs from his problems
Travels for work
Drives a modded Subaru
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Alyssa:
Preforms unethical experiments in the sims 3
Loves cows
So many many plushies there's no room for her in the bed
weezer fan
Talks a lot
Lots of keychains/charms
Maximalism!
Assertive
Good listener
Workaholic 
HAS to be the BEST at anything she does
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Rosie
Grew up with strict parents
Working too many hours at Dunkin Donuts
Former ballet/dancer
Likes to bake and really good at it!
Compulsive liar
"I have a twin sister who goes to another school"
Gets jealous easily
Body image problems/eating disorders :(
Emotionally Immature 
Spider eyelashes
A nose ring is "rebelling from my parents"
Currently in college
Afraid of change
Emotional support eldest daughter
Loves to sing
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desperately wishing the staff would stop catering to the users who can't handle narrative themes that are more challenging than blues clues. "our clans are supposed to be the good guys, we're supposed to root for them" says who, exactly? I've seen at least a dozen lairs with lore where the entire clan is dead and the lair is a ghost town. theres even more where the clans are blatantly evil, even though you have to be super careful how to write things otherwise you get your account nuked. stop relying on media to hold your hand and tell you how to feel with 0 personal interpretation.
this site lore has no believable conflict, or any at all at this point, and it's impossible to even try taking it seriously. you can't even say the brewing process actually melts the shit you throw in the pot because the idea of throwing a cricket in there to get some goop is too traumatizing for the userbase, apparently.
nothing can ever be remotely bad, ever. there's a thing called "nuance" and a very loud portion of the userbase, undel and rat mod just cannot wrap their fuckin' heads around it. it's tiresome. fiction isn't reality and not every fuckin' thing is a dog whistle or propaganda or whatthefuck ever the newest buzzword is idk ya'll are too ridiculous to keep up with anymore. log off and eat some oatmeal.
TLDR: please at least attempt to read or watch 1 thing that isn't intended for preschoolers before you start shitting up the tags with your deep intellectual analysis of what you think "problematic" media is, based off a twitter thread you read once.
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urfavhasnoass · 2 years
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Lawrence "Larry" Presipence from Plainview has shrodingers ass! fuck you. (anon request)
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insimniacreations · 1 year
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Grocery Haul Feb 2023
REQUIRED MOD:
The 2/26/23 updated version of My Grocery Shopping List mod. Please delete the old version after updating to the latest version.
Optional
The 2/26/23 updated version of the Custom Register. Please delete the old version after updating to the latest version.
Recipes
Hearty Spaghetti with Lentils & Marinara Sauce (found in Rice & Pasta)
Strawberry Oatmeal Bars (found in Desserts)
OPTIONAL Custom Ingredients (Get the custom ingredients HERE) If you don't want to use ingredients, only download the recipes below.
Driscoll's Sweetest Batch Strawberries
Goya Lentils
Bertolli Traditional Marinara Sauce
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TERMS OF USE
Please be respectful and do not release my early access content. They are only early access and will be free.
Please do not include my items in uploaded builds. Link back to my Patreon page for others to download separately
Please do not recolor, convert, and/or edit my meshes
Please do not reupload
DOWNLOAD
Now on Early Access. Public Release: 3/22 @ 8pm EST
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chamerionwrites · 17 days
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🧂
If you ever want to encounter people with the absolute worst taste known to humankind, look up some video game beauty mods. Who knew it was possible to create so many character models which land squarely in the center of the uncanny valley whilst simultaneously being as featurelessly bland as instant oatmeal?
Alas, all that coding work to publicize the fact that you have not a single speck of sensuality in your soul.
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busra-tr · 1 year
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🖤 OATMEAL SET-304 (JUMPER) BD875🖤
10 Colors
Adult-Elder-Teen-Young Adult
For Female
Compatible with HQ mod-
-New Mesh
-All Lods
- Custom thumbnail
**-Please do not re upload or claim as yours feel free to re color but do not include the mesh .
DOWNLOAD TSR
I hope you like them.  ♥
💖 You can check out my Patreon for special cc and other early access content. 💖
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loginceweek2024 · 3 months
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Thank You!
And with that, Logince Week has officially come to an end. It has been such a pleasure organizing this event again, and seeing all of your wonderful submissions. This event wouldn't have been the same without your contributions! Which is why I wanted to take a moment to shout-out the amazing creators who participated 💫
Thank you artists: @soc1850 @dustylogicalityrat @blackoutbugza @starshard17 @thegoldenduckie @xandriagreat @shsl-fander @fandombead! You've all submitted such inspiring, colorful, vivid pieces of art for the prompts. It's so fun to see how everyone of you imagines the individual characters' appearances and the mutual dynamic between them in your own art styles - fantastic job!
Thank you writers: @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat @shsl-fander @virgil-is-verge! Your creativity and imagination knows no bounds, you have all written so much during this event! Every story just captured the core characteristics and dynamic traits that we love in this duo: their rivalry, their shared insecurities, their perseverence and diligence. Kudos!
Special thank you to @loganslowdown4 for your hilarious quotes, which have been a daily joy to look forward to! And thank you @the-duke-of-nuts for your wonderful edit of the boys serenading their beloved jam 🥰
And of course, I extend my gratitude to every follower, every like and comment and reblog during Logince Week! The event wouldn't be an event without you 💙❤️
As always, it's been a pleasure to be your mod. Looking forward to seeing you again next year! In the meantime, feel free to scroll through this blog's submissions to your heart's contect and show the creators some love ✨
💙❤️
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pavlezki · 8 months
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Psychonauts 2 - Oatmeal Idle Pose (Re-Animated)
Let me know if you need this mod
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lysenfeu · 11 months
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Pair of Aces - Chapter 3. Day Three
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Pair of Aces
Chapter: 3. Day Three
Rating: M
Word Count: 5.6k~
Summary: Our pair finally head out into the field to track Butterflies and Vigilante gets the opportunity to demonstrate his skills.
Chapter Content: Descriptions of violence/Canon-typical Violence, Weapons (Guns, Knives), Mild Blood/gore
A/N: Whoops this took way longer than expected to finish but it ended up way longer than I originally planned so here we go! More tension and some much-needed mission action where Vig finally gets to show off a bit. I hope you enjoy it~
[Read Previous Chapter] [Read Next Chapter]
[Read on AO3]
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She woke up late the next morning, grateful to actually have gotten some rest for the first time since she arrived in town. Vigilante was already awake. He was puttering around the room, focused on sorting out his armour pieces on his bed with his mask already on.
“How long have you been up?”
He jumped, not realizing she was awake. He turned towards her and shrugged. “A while, I don’t sleep much.”
“Have you eaten?” She pulled out two packets of instant oatmeal and two travel bowls from her pack.
He eyed the packets suspiciously as she held them up to him. “What flavour?”
“Maple and brown sugar, duh.”
He nodded his approval and she moved around him to fill the bowls with water and pop them in the microwave. She carefully handed him the warm bowl with a spoon and sat down on the edge of her bed to eat. He turned his back to her and rolled up the bottom of his mask before popping a spoonful of oatmeal into his now-exposed mouth.
“Seriously dude? You won’t even let me see you eat?”
“Safety precaution, I told you.” He huffed, blowing on his spoon to cool down the hot breakfast.
She rolled her eyes. “I can’t identify you in a lineup from just your chin.” He didn’t respond and continued to eat with his back to her. She was annoyed but decided not to press the topic. He got weirdly defensive every time it came up and she didn’t want to push it this early on.
She quickly finished her own bowl and rinsed it off in the sink. She walked around the motel room to grab her gear bag and unpack the equipment they’d need for the mission. She pulled out a gun case and several smaller attachés filled with blades. The second she unlatched the case, Vigilante popped up over her shoulder.
“Oh cool, a Walther PPK! Kinda small though isn't it?”
She rolled her eyes and tried not to snap at him. "It's not small, it's perfectly normal-sized."
"It's totally not normal, it's tiny." He looked down at the gun with a judgemental tone.
She gently removed it from the case, showing him how it fits perfectly in her grip before placing it back down.
"See, normal size! Don't shame me!"
He grabbed her wrist and held her hand still as he raised his own palm and pressed it against hers. She hadn't paid much attention to his hands before, she'd barely even noticed he hadn't put his gloves on yet.
But now she couldn’t help but stare as his large palm dwarfed hers entirely. His long thick fingers folded over the top of hers, covering her hand.
"See? Definitely not normal, you just have tiny hands."
She yanked her hand out of her grip and scowled at him. "I have normal hands, shut up.”
She rolled her eyes at him again and stepped back to make some space between them. “Let me guess, you use something insanely impractical like a Desert Eagle."
He laughed and shook his head. "Nah, that's more Peacemaker’s style. I keep it simple." He pulled out his gun belt from his pile of gear and snapped his pistol out of its holster.
He held it up for her and she immediately recognized it. A Walther PP, the same line as hers but a bulkier original model. The pistol was modded with a custom bronze-tinted shell, an understated look that she thought was surprising for Vigilante.
"Bronze? What, did they not come in teal?" She couldn't hold her tongue on that one, friendship order be damned.
His shoulders sagged as he sadly replied, "No! They couldn't even custom order it for me and I definitely asked. Like, a lot."
Of course, you did.
She bit the inside of her cheek to keep the snark to a minimum.
"Well, it's a decent weapon regardless of colour. You seem well equipped." She gestured towards the assembled pile on top of his mattress. His second pistol, an assortment of knives and his sword lay on top.
He cocked his head to the side before he realized she was looking at his weapons stash.
"Oh! Yeah, uh. I like to have options."
She laughed lightly. "Well, that's another thing we have in common."
She grabbed one of the attachés and opened it up for him to see. It was neatly packed with a variety of blades. The selection included a set of black throwing knives, several fixed blades with serrated edges and a pair of push daggers. She quickly unpacked the other case to reveal an assortment of folding blades, smaller throwing knives and a purple satin pouch.
He immediately reached over to grab one of the serrated blades and she smacked his hand away, shooting him an annoyed look.
"Watch it! Didn't your mom ever teach you not to grab things that aren't yours?"
"Nope." He reached back around her to try and grab it again so she smacked him a bit harder.
He yelped and pulled back his hand. "Hey, that hurt!" She's not certain but it sounded like he was pouting behind his mask.
"If you want to touch something, ask nicely first."
He sighed and crossed his arms childishly. "Fiiiine. May I touch the cool knives?" He hesitated for a second and then added a rushed 'please' at the end.
She chuckled at his petulant tone. "Okay, fine. But I'm not responsible if you hurt yourself."
He scoffed. "As if! You were the one who called me an 'impressively talented marksman', thank you very much!"
She raised an eyebrow. "That was with a rifle, not knives."
"Yeah well, I'm good with blades too."
She started to fire back a snarky response but was caught off guard as he deftly picked up a short-handled serrated blade. He spun it between his fingers, effortlessly flipping it around in his hand.
Okay, maybe he was right about being good with blades.
She watched the expert movements in shock, observing how he made the razor-sharp edge glide and twirl through the air with delicate precision.
Good might be an understatement, actually. Damn.
For someone who had never previously cared about hands, she was certainly doing a lot of staring at them today. She shook her head to clear her distracted thoughts.
“Alright, enough screwing around." She gestured for him to give back the blade. "We’ve got to head out soon. Did you get the coordinates from Harcourt?” She was back in business mode, mind focused on sorting the rest of her gear instead of his large and talented hands.
Vigilante sighed in disappointment but dutifully placed the knife back in the case and pulled out his phone.
“Yeah, the location isn’t far from here. Maybe a fifteen-minute drive? The road access cuts off and there are some woodlands nearby. We can set up there, it has a decent view of the place.”
Their assignment was simple. There was a rural farmhouse sitting on a large acreage outside of Evergreen. ARGUS had tracked some activity in the area and their intel indicated a group of suspected Butterflies were using it as a hub of some kind. The pair were supposed to set up onsite surveillance and confirm the presence of Butterflies in the house. At any sign of trouble or Butterflies on the move, orders were to shoot on sight.
She buckled her pistol into her belt holster and picked out a selection of knives to bring, carefully sliding something small out of the purple pouch and tucking it into a belt pocket when she thought Vig wasn’t looking. Her pack had the rest of the essentials needed for field missions, including an ample supply of granola bars, a GPS tracker and first aid supplies. After confirming Vigilante already had the Task Force X-issued rifle, scope and cameras in the car and triple checking her weapon selection, she was ready to go.
While she had geared up, Vigilante had done the same but faster. Waiting by the motel room door in full gear, he was antsy to get going. He opened the door for her and followed her out, locking it behind them. The pair climbed into the Sebring and pulled out of the motel lot. Vigilante was right, the site wasn't very far at all and they quickly turned off the rural road and tucked the car behind some foliage.
Vig opened the trunk, shouldered the rifle bag and grabbed the cameras. She had oriented herself quickly in the unfamiliar location and started to make her way through the woods. He followed closely behind her as they walked a short way and up a small hill. Once at the top, they had a full view of the acreage below. A large weather-worn farmhouse sat towards the front of the property, resting at the end of a wide gravel drive. Peeling red paint and a rotting deck tarnished what must have been a nice building at a previous point in time.
Setting up the cameras was the first order of business. They had a great view of the house and rigged up the surveillance easily, with one covering the front door and two on the back of the property and driveway. The next task was setting up the rifle.
"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" She asked him suspiciously, watching him swear under his breath as he fumbled with the rifle.
"Yes! Just give me a minute." He muttered back at her.
“Alright, fine.”
She turned away from him, grabbed a pair of binoculars from the kit and started scoping out the farmhouse. The state of the place was abysmal. The entire exterior was in disrepair with several windows cracked or broken and holes in the screens. Broken appliances and other junk littered the back.
How could anyone live in a place like this?
Frankly, it looked like no one was. Nothing looked recently used or accessed. There was no sign of life in or around the building. She frowned. This didn't match the intel.
Vigilante had finished setting up his stuff and plopped down beside her.
"So what's the deal?"
She sighed and pulled the binoculars down.
"It doesn't look like anyone's here. Honestly, it doesn't look like anyone's been here in years."
Vigilante groaned. "This isn't going to be fun is it?"
She shook her head at him. "Probably not."
As the day wore on, she was proven correct about that. Several hours had passed with no activity on the entire property.
The ground was hard and uncomfortable and Vigilante was restless. He was constantly moving around, humming to himself and generally complaining about the lack of action. He was making a lot of noise and it had started to annoy her.
“This is sooo boring,” Vigilante whined, fidgeting from his place on the ground.
She sat back on her heels and looked at him with a tired glare. “It’s recon work, it’s not supposed to be exciting.”
“Aren’t there supposed to be people here? What’s the point of us being here if this place is empty?”
As if on cue, they heard a crunching noise and watched as a large white cargo van drove up the gravel path leading to the house. They saw a tall man climb out of the driver's seat and enter the dilapidated building.
“Fucking finally!” Vigilante hops up off the ground and starts heading down the hill.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” She grabbed him by the collar of his chest piece and yanked him back.
“Uh, I’m going to go kill that guy? Obviously.”
His nonchalant tone irritated her to no end. "No, you're not! Do you even know what recon means?"
He paused, thinking hard for a moment. "Re…constitute?"
Her face contorted in a mix of disbelief and frustration. "What? No! Why the fuck would it be reconstitute?" She shook her head at him. "It means reconnaissance."
"Is that French? How would I know that? I don't speak French!"
She sighed. "It's technically a loan word."
"A what?"
She successfully resisted the urge to hit him. "It's a word that was originally French but it was used so much that it became considered part of the English language too."
"Man, language is weird.” His voice got a little quieter. “So…what does it mean?"
She sighed again. “It means surveying. We’re just here gathering information, waiting and watching for a headcount on potential targets and their travel patterns. You can't just run in guns blazing!”
“Really?” He seemed surprised. “It works pretty well for me.”
Continuing to resist the urge to hit him was becoming more and more difficult for her. “We don’t even know if that guy is a Butterfly or not. We just need to keep an eye on him and be stealthy. Can you do that?
He crossed his arms across his chest and nodded. “I can be very stealthy.”
She squinted at him. “I kind of don't believe you.”
“It's true!” He protested a bit too loudly. “I am a master of stealth.”
“And being quiet?”
“If I’m quiet can I kill that guy soon?”
She thought for a moment and the temptation of his silence won out. “If he’s a Butterfly, yes.”
Vigilante sighed but accepted her answer, scrambling up off the ground.
“Remember, only if you’re quiet. We’re just watching for now.” She warned him.
He mimed zipping his mouth closed and nodded silently. She raised a doubtful eyebrow but nodded in return and turned back to the farmhouse with her binoculars. She watched the man walk by one of the cracked windows and then lost sight of him. She sat down on the ground and tried to find a comfortable position on the hard dirt.
She lost track of how much time she had spent staring through the cracked windows. Even though she knew someone was now inside, there was no sign of movement. She put the binoculars down in frustration. She refocused on her surroundings and noted it was actually quiet for once. She hadn’t heard Vigilante humming or muttering to himself in a while. She glanced over to where the rifle was set up but there was no sign of him.
Where was he?
Her thoughts were interrupted by two strong arms grabbing her from behind. She shrieked in surprise as the arms wrapped around her waist and suddenly she was in the air. Vigilante had snuck up behind her and grabbed her in a giant bear hug, lifting her off the ground and holding her tight against him.
"What the hell!" She tried not to scream at him but her voice carried anyways.
Once her initial shock wore off and she realised what he was doing, she immediately struggled against him to free herself. Unfortunately for her, she was unable to break his hold at all. She couldn't help but take note of how strong his grip was and how effortlessly he had picked her up.
She tried to get out of his hold again but ended up just flailing around uselessly. She stopped moving after she realised she was basically just grinding against him. He dared to laugh in her ear at her failed attempts to escape, which just incensed her further.
“Let me go!”
His grip around her tightened. "Only if you admit how super stealthy I am!"
She flailed some more before getting even more frustrated. She finally had enough, kicked her heel backwards and clipped him hard in the shin. He groaned in pain and finally released her. “Hey, no fair!”
She spun around and jabbed him in the chest with an accusatory finger. “We're supposed to be quiet! What if they heard that?”
He waved off her concern. “They didn't, it's fine.”
“How do you know?”
“Just trust me.”
She huffed and ignored him, picking up the binoculars from the ground to check for herself.
Goddammit.
He was right. There was no sign of movement inside the house and the man hadn’t come out to check on the noise.
"Can you at least admit I'm a master of stealth now?"
She grumbled to herself but well, technically he was right. “Fine, that was very fucking stealthy. But don't ever do that again, you got lucky this time Teal.”
“Teal?”
“Yeah.” She shrugged at him. “That’s your new nickname. Everyone gets one.”
“Everyone?”
“Everyone on the team." She started counting them off on her fingers. "There’s Big Red, Blondie, Dye-beard, New-girl-who’s-name-I-forget-but-seems-too-nice-for-this-job and Murn.”
“Just Murn? Why doesn't he get a nickname?”
She snorted. “Try giving that man a nickname and not die.”
“Oh. Yeah, fair.” He easily accepted her answer. “Her name’s Adebayo by the way.”
“Who?”
“The new girl. Leota Adebayo.”
“Huh." She nodded in appreciation. "Got it, thanks. I should try and remember that. She does seem nice.”
“She is! She’s my new fifth best friend. I told Peacemaker he should be friends with her too.”
“Wait, you rank your friends?”
“Yeah, obviously. Don’t you?”
“No! Who does that?”
Suddenly, the pair were interrupted by the slam of a front door. They both spun around in time to see the tall man exiting the farmhouse. They were stunned to see him being followed by half a dozen other people.
What the fuck!?
She grabbed the binoculars to get a better look at what was happening. The entire group was walking rigidly, with expressionless faces and dead eyes. One of the strangers trailed behind carrying a crate loaded with large glass bottles containing a strange liquid. The tall man climbed into the driver's seat of the van while the others filed robotically into the back.
"Shit! They're on the move." She cursed again and frantically grabbed her pack off the ground. She motioned to Vigilante to follow her and saw he had already grabbed the rifle and was headed in the same direction. They needed to get back to the Sebring as soon as possible and tail that cargo van.
"Where the fuck did all those people come from? What the fuck is happening?" She was out of breath as they ran to the vehicle and hopped in.
"No fucking idea but they're definitely Butterflies." He gunned the engine and pulled the car back around to face the road. Not a moment too soon as the white van rolled right past them. Vig started following them, slowly trailing behind to not get them spotted. After about five minutes the van pulled off into what looked like a dead end. As they followed down the turn the pair saw a wide stretch of land.
In the middle of the pasture was an open-walled barn structure. The group of Butterflies was milling around inside the structure silently. Each of them grabbed a glass jar of liquid from the case. She watched as they unscrewed the lids and extended a proboscis-like tongue and started lapping up the fluid.
"Oh, that's super gross." She mumbled to herself.
"See? Definitely Butterflies. Can I kill them now?"
She looked at Vigilante, who was bouncing around next to her waiting for the all-clear. The orders were to shoot on sight if things got weird.
"Yeah, fine. Go ahead."
He started humming happily to himself while he lined up the rifle scope.
"Think you can get them all?"
Vig snorted. "Uh, yeah. Not a problem."
She pulled out her binoculars and trained them on the targets. There were seven Butterflies in total, all standing around the open structure. She was grateful for the lack of walls, giving them both an easy view of the targets.
"Tell you what, drinks are on me if you can headshot every target." She was just kidding around. Despite Vigilante’s cockiness, she was sure he couldn’t pull that off.
He had finished setting up the rifle and was lining up his shot. “Deal. Count them for me.”
The first shot rang out and the tall male who had driven the van dropped to the ground as a bullet pierced through his forehead.
"One."
The Butterflies crowded over the body and looked around trying to locate the source of the shots. Vigilante fired again and caught another through the skull.
"Two."
The targets started to panic now, moving around and trying to scatter. Two more shots rang out in rapid succession. She watched two more Butterflies drop, one caught through the temple and one through the eye.
"Three. Four."
The remaining three had started to move faster, trying to flee the shelter. Vigilante fired again, taking down the closest one with another headshot.
"Five."
Is he seriously going to do it?
The Butterflies were running now and Vig needed to move fast. Two final shots echoed and the corresponding bodies dropped, unmoving with bullets lodged in the back of their skulls.
"Six. Seven."
Holy shit.
She spun towards him, dropping her binoculars. "Holy shit."
Vigilante leaned back from the rifle, still humming happily. "Told you I could do it."
"I didn't think it was possible. That was fucking amazing!" She grinned at him, wholly impressed with his performance. She hopped up off the ground and held out a hand to help him do the same.
“Alright hot shot, time to check your work.”
The pair quickly made their way down to the pasture. They needed to double-check check each Butterfly was actually dead and take some photos to ID them before sending a clean-up crew later on.
She trudged along the structure, looking down at the assorted bodies. Three were outside the building in the grass and the other four were scattered around inside. She left the furthest away ones to Vigilante and made her way around to the others. Dead, dead, dead. She still can barely believe he got all seven clean right through the head.
She walked towards the last body, one slumped against one of the building's support beams. She was right next to the corpse, looking at the hole in its head when suddenly something small twitched inside the wound. The body let out an inhuman screech and lurched upwards to grab at her.
She screamed in surprise as she tried to wrench herself away and not fall over. Vigilante rushed over and grabbed her by the waist, yanking her backwards and out of the corpse's grip. He slid a hand over her hip and grabbed something from her belt and flung it towards the Butterfly. A whirl of purple flew through the air and embedded itself deep into its head. Blood and some strange shimmery fluid sprayed across her at the impact, splashing across her face. Another screech sounded before growing quiet and the body slumped back over, unmoving.
“Hey, what the fuck!” She shoved him away and tried to wipe the mess from her face, only succeeding in smearing it more.
"You've got to get the things in their skulls or they don't stay down." He offered as an explanation.
“I really would've liked to have known that before now. That was fucking disgusting! And was that my knife?!” She whips around and leans down to inspect the Butterfly's corpse. With a solid yank, she pulled out the purple-handled blade from where it was embedded in the skull and glowered at him.
“What did I say about grabbing things?!” She practically screamed.
“It was kind of an emergency.” He threw his hands up in defence. “I had to think quickly!”
She scowled as she carefully inspected the knife for any damage, thankfully finding none.
Of course, he had to grab this one. Idiot.
He was annoyed with being yelled at by her. "You know I did just save you, you could say thank you. It's just a knife!"
She hesitated to answer. "This one is …special."
“Why is it unbalanced?”
She glared at him. “That's a security measure. It’s supposed to make it harder for someone to use if they steal it from me.”
“Huh.” He cocked his head to the side and looked at her. “It didn’t, by the way. It was really easy to compensate for.”
She narrowed her eyes, then stepped forward suddenly and wiped the sullied knife on his sleeve before slipping it back into her belt.
“Ew, gross! What did you do that for?” He jumped back and held out his sleeve to observe the new stain.
“You got blood on my face! Also, don’t take my stuff!” She snapped angrily and stomped out of the barn, sidestepping the rest of the Butterfly corpses. Vigilante trailed after her, muttering complaints about his ruined shirt.
They made their way back to the Sebring, slung the gear in the back and climbed in. She pulled down the passenger side mirror and inspected the smears of blood and who knows what else on her face. She grimaced at the disgusting sight and sighed in frustration at her appearance.
“Here.”
Vigilante nudged her and handed her a pack of wet wipes. She stared down at the offering for a moment before accepting the item. She opened the wipes and started cleaning her face, relaxing slightly.
“Thanks.”
“I’m sorry about the blood.” He meant it. He had reacted instinctively when she was in trouble, the splatter was an accident.
She finished dabbing the last spots on her face and handed him back the wet wipes. “And taking my knife?”
He huffed but continued. “Okay, yes. I’m also sorry for taking your knife.” He paused for a moment and then continued in a slightly more bitter tone. “Even though I totally saved your life. And also killed all the other people. And drove us everywhere.”
She crossed her arms in annoyance and raised her voice. “You want a thank you for doing your job?”
His shoulders sagged and the tone disappeared from his voice. “Kind of, yeah. I was trying to impress you.”
She lowered her arms and her volume to match. “Alright, theft of my property aside,” She shot him a look. “You did, in fact, impress me. You did a really good job today. I didn’t even think making every single one of those shots was possible but fuck, you killed it out there.”
He chuckled at her terrible play on words and seemed a bit more at ease after the praise. “I believe you owe me drinks now.”
She groaned, that was supposed to be a joke. “Fine. I’m nothing if not a woman of my word. What’s your poison of choice?”
He thought for a moment before deciding. “Whiskey.”
She whipped out her phone and checked their location. “Alright, the nearest liquor store back in town is closed for tonight so I’ll have to grab your victory drinks tomorrow. But there’s good news, the pizza place near the motel is still open.” She held her phone out towards him so he could see the menu. “Go ahead and pick the toppings.”
“You’re letting me choose?” He was confused seeing as she had just been very mad at him.
She rolled her eyes. “Standard protocol, the agent with the highest body count each mission picks the pizza. No sense breaking from tradition.”
He took the phone from her and selected his favourite combo, double pepperoni and bacon, before handing it back. He pulled the Sebring out of the brush and got on the road heading back towards the motel.
The ride back was quiet. Vig pulled up in front of the tiny, clearly family-run pizza place and she ducked inside to pick up their order before they made it back to the motel. Parking at the far end of the lot again, they headed inside their suite.
She placed the pizza down on the coffee table near the TV and loveseat before walking over to her bed. She grabbed a toiletries case and her pjs before heading to the bathroom.
"I'm just gonna hop in the shower, still feeling a little gross." She called out to Vigilante. He was in the middle of stripping off his armour pieces and gave her a thumbs-up before she closed the door.
The motel shower had zero water pressure and was way more cramped than she preferred but at least it was clean and had hot water. She didn't waste her time and made quick work of cleaning herself up.
She exited the bathroom, feeling refreshed and comfortably changed into her pjs. She realised she was absolutely starving and quickly walked over to the pizza box on the coffee table to grab a slice. She plopped down in the middle of the loveseat and took a huge bite, savouring the hot food. As she was chewing, she turned towards Vigilante and choked.
He was standing over his mattress packing up his gear, with his side turned towards her. That was normal. The reason she was currently coughing up pizza from her lungs was the fact that he was doing it shirtless.
The edge of his black mask contrasted sharply with his bare skin and drew her eyes down to his shoulders and arms. He was surprisingly bulky. Broad shoulders led into thick, toned biceps and down into muscular forearms, with those large hands she had tried to forget about earlier.
“Holy shit.”
She didn’t even realise she had said that out loud until he turned towards her. Her eyes widened as she was confronted with a full frontal view of his shirtless torso.
She couldn't help but take in the view, it was the first good look at him she'd gotten without his armour on. A spattering of freckles and various scars dotted his skin, decorating the expanse of his muscles. She couldn't help but trail her eyes across his pecs down his well-developed abs. A whisper of dark hair trailed into his waistband along the v-cut above his hips and she caught herself wondering what else he was hiding under his clothes.
Fuck.
"What was that?" He hadn't heard exactly what she'd said while he was turned around.
She tore her gaze away from him, trying to pretend she wasn't flustered as hell.
“Wh- why are you half-naked?” She managed to splutter out.
“You got blood on my shirt.”
"Oh. Right."
Her gaze slowly drifted back over his exposed chest. …and abs…and hips…
How the fuck did he manage to hide all those muscles under his suit?
“Are you okay? You have a weird look on your face." Vigilante was patiently looking at her, waiting for a response.
She was jolted back down to earth and tried desperately to fight the blush creeping up her cheeks.
"Uh, yeah. I'm fine. It was too hot." Her eyes widened at her unintended phrasing. "The pizza! The pizza was too hot, burnt my tongue. Got distracted. By the hot pizza!" She coughed into her hand and turned away from him to hide her embarrassment.
Real fucking smooth. You're here to work, not be a creep. Calm down.
"You should put your pyjamas on." She quickly added, "You know, so you won’t get cold.”
“Uh, okay. Sure.” He simply shrugged and walked over to his mattress.
When she worked up the nerve to look back at him, Vigilante had indeed put on his pyjamas. He was still standing near the beds, looking over at her.
"We can both sit here if you want, it's fine." She scooted over to make as much room for him as she could on the two-seater couch.
He came over and sat down then looked over at the pizza box. He hesitated for a moment but after a beat, he had made a decision. He rolled up his mask over his nose without turning away from her. She cautiously said nothing, not wanting to make him nervous. Instead, she took the chance to subtly examine the newly visible lower half of his face while he grabbed a piece of pizza.
Her eyes traced up the length of his thick neck and across his sharp, defined jaw. She noticed there was a hint of dark stubble across his chin and cheeks. She watched him lift a slice to his plush lips and she unconsciously bit her lip when his Adam's apple bobbed up and down as he swallowed.
What was that about calming down?
She quickly glanced away, not wanting to be caught ogling him yet again. This was a job, he was a coworker. She needed to keep it professional.
After he had finished the piece of pizza in his hand, he turned toward her. "Hey, it's Fargo night. Do you mind if I put it on?"
She shrugged casually as he grabbed the remote and flipped to the right channel. "Go ahead. But what the fuck is Fargo?"
He froze reaching for another slice and gasped in shock that she didn’t know what Fargo was. She nearly regretted asking as soon as he launched into an overly animated retelling of the entire plot and each individual character. He was going to chat her ear off about this the entire night, wasn’t he?
Ah well, I guess he earned it for today.
She cut him some slack and smiled passively, feigning interest as he continued talking through the whole episode to explain it all for her. She didn’t want to let him know she wasn’t listening at all and was simply enjoying the excuse to steal glances at his mouth the whole time. Somewhere near the end of the night, his endless talking had lulled her to sleep.
Vigilante eventually noticed she had curled up on her side of the couch with her head on the armrest. He quietly turned off the television and grabbed a pillow and sheet from his bed. Careful not to wake her up, he tucked the pillow under her head and covered her with the blanket before climbing into his own bed and turning off the lights.
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A/N: These two are playing a game I like to call "awkward dance of the idiots", though I'm pretty sure shirtless Vigilante would melt anyone's brain lol. More slow burn, patience will definitely be rewarded soon I promise! Let me know what you think so far <3
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