#my uterus wanted baby asap | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

baekhansol · 3 years

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relief & reassurance

pairing: san x reader, wooyoung x reader (both san & wooyoung are doms, reader is sub)

genres: comfort, angst-ish, smut, completely self indulgence | rating: mature ! do not interact if a minor

word count: 3812

plot: you're feeling down, and your boyfriends try to make you feel better

warnings: depression, self hatred, skin picking disorder, body weight insecurity, polyamourous relationship, nipple/ breast play, fingering, sex toy usage, oral, bdsm themes, doms/sub relationships, orgasm denial & control, squirting, spanking, choking, biting/marking/slight scratching, a bit of hair pulling, slight teasing, use of pet names (princess, good girl), bulge kink, creampie, unprotected sex (please be safe!!), doggystyle, praise kink, multiple orgasm, pain kink(?), threesome, use of the color light system (just check-ins, no safe word use), subspace, and sweet sweet aftercare - as usual, let me know if I missed anything!

a/n: this is a very very self indulgent fic. a very special thanks to @sugasbabiie for beta reading this for me and pointing out some things that I needed to change 💜💜💜

You felt disgusting, broken, and just downright depressed. You were supposed to hang out with San for the night, but he was running late. So you went ahead and ordered takeout, getting his favorite. Ever since you started dating him and Wooyoung, you would take time to have a date night with them separately and together. That way, you wouldn't always be the victim of their teasing.

You hear San unlocking the door, so you do your best to act fine as you go over to greet him.

"I'm glad you're finally here!" You say, pulling him into a hug.

"Hi baby," he says, his dimples appearing as he hugs you back. "It smells delightful," San adds, pulling back and looking at you. His eyebrow twitches, and you're afraid he is going to ask what was wrong, but instead, he takes off his shoes.

"I'm glad! I bought your favorite barbecue, and I think it might still be warm," you tell him, clapping your hands once as you go to check, San trailing behind.

"Did you already eat?" He checks, looking at you sternly as he breaks the wooden chopsticks.

"Yes, and if you want proof, it's in the trash can," you say, looking down and away.

"Alright," he says, his voice softening immediately. "Go turn something you like on, okay? I'll eat and then clean up."

You nod and kiss his cheek, going back and turning on the show you've been marathoning. San comes and sits next to you, eating and half-heartedly paying attention.

You lean against his shoulder and curl up into your blanket, trying to relax. Your insecurities were getting the better of you.

When San finishes his food, he kisses your cheek. "I'll be back in a few," he says, and you know he is going to shower.

"Make sure to brush your teeth!"

"I will," San responds with a chuckle.

When San returns from cleaning up, you hadn't realized you zoned out from the show and started crying. He turns off the TV and pulls you into his lap slowly, giving you the opportunity to pull away.

You don't, so you end up letting out a soft sob against his chest. San soothingly plays with your hair and rubs your back, letting you cry while saying soothing words in your ear.

"It's okay baby, let it out. I'm here for you, don't worry. You can tell me anything; you know that, right?"

When you’ve calmed down enough, and you blow your nose, San finally asks, "What has you so worked up, Y/N?"

You sigh, looking away and shaking your head.

"I just want to help," he assures you, "So please, tell me."

He wipes your tears away with his thumb, his own eyes full of concern.

"I've just been… feeling really insecure and hating my body," you murmur, looking away. "I hate that I have a stupid skin picking disorder. I hate how fat I am. I hate my stretch marks and my stupid eyes. I hate that I have two incredibly attractive boyfriends, and I'm just a potato," you rant, getting overly worked up to the point you start crying again.

"No, no, no, no, precious no," San says, his heart breaking as he sends a quick text to Wooyoung (get your ass over here asap).

"You're so beautiful, okay? We are all humans with flaws. Woo and I are idols, so that's why you think that. Remember my high school and middle school photos? I'd probably look worse than that now if I weren't an idol and could spend lots of money on skincare," he says with a slight giggle, handing you tissues again.

You take it and blow your nose again, groaning slightly. He just had to be logical.

"And I love all of you. I love your sexy body. I love your personality. I love the way you think and talk; how you see the world. I love your pretty eyes. They can see, you know? So you can see me," he giggles at that a little, gently kissing each of your eyelids.

"I love your pretty lips," he says, running a thumb over them. "I love your body. There's so much to cuddle, and you're soft and even better to cuddle than shiber, but don't tell them." At this, San gently starts caressing your body.

"And you know, your sweet tummy isn't going to be flat like mine. It's hard work to keep abs, and I generally don't eat before we perform to keep them there. Because when I eat, bye bye abs," he tells you, pulling his shirt up to show you how his stomach was just smooth and soft.

"And for your tummy," San begins, laying you down on the couch and pulling your shirt up to kiss it. "Your pretty tummy holds your uterus and the most precious parts of the entire female reproductive system, your ovaries and eggs. And right here," he kisses under your belly button, getting closer to over your pubic bone, a very sensitive spot for you, "right here is where all the magic happens."

You quirk an eyebrow, waiting for him to explain as you feel your cheeks heating up.

"It's where a baby will grow, if we decide to have one, and it's where your body let's you know it's reproductively healthy," he starts, kissing lower and lower each time, until you're biting your tongue to hold back a moan. San picks up the change in your state, swallowing the need to smirk.

"And your legs, your beautiful legs," he murmurs, massaging your feet and up your calves. "They carry you around all day and are so pretty." San kisses your shins, then slowly up your inner thighs, making you squirm.

His strong hands hold you in place as he continues worshiping your body. "You're beautiful thighs," he murmurs, nipping them. "They hide something beautiful between them, but even on their own…" San tries not to groan, as he can tell he is growing hard by your soft gasps. "They're soft and lovely to rest my head on, like your breasts, and I could spend all day marking them up. I love the way they jiggle like your ass does when spanked," he adds, looking you in your eye as he rubs your thigh, what he normally would do before spanking you.

When you nod, he gives them a resounding smack. This time, you don't hold back your moan.

He takes your hands in his, kissing your palms. "Your beautiful hands are perfect to hold, and your arms giving the best hugs, but don't tell Wooyoung or really anyone I said that," San giggles a little again, kissing up your arms, nipping here and there on the soft flesh.

"I know you hate how you pick at your arms, and I know how hard it is for you to control that impulse. But I want to help you, and I assure you Wooyoung feels the same way, okay?" he assures you.

You look away, more embarrassed than aroused now. "Precious, I asked you a question," he says, turning your chin to make you look at him, his dominance coming out.

"Yes sir," you say, biting your lip.

"You don't have to call me sir right now. This is about you. Now, can I make you feel good?" He whispers, his thumb ghosting over your lip as his knee ruts into your core.

"Please," you sigh, wondering if he would ask first or if he would make you beg.

Your word pleased him, as he immediately picks you up and kisses you deeply, carrying you to your bed.

“I love you so much; you know that, right?” San asks as he sets you down on the bed, helping you out of your shirt.

“I do,” you say softly, looking down as your face heats up.

San plants another sweet kiss on your lips, then slowly down your neck.

“Your soft skin is so kissable,” he says with a little giggle, nipping and sucking lightly, just enough to leave slight marks for the day. He undoes your bra, laying you back on the bed as his mouth travels down your decolletage, his hands caressing your breasts.

“You’re so precious to me, and I love all of you,” San assures you. “Are you sure you’re okay? You’ll say yellow if you’re uncomfortable? Red if you want to stop?” he adds.

“I love you too,” you whisper, looking down at him lovingly. “And I always will,” you assure him.

He immediately takes one of your breasts in his mouth, his teeth lightly grazing your nipple, causing you to moan out his name.

He smiles against your skin, giving the same attention to the other breast. San begins to kiss down your stomach, humming while he does.

“I love your soft tummy,” he murmurs, looking up at you with utmost sincerity in his eyes. “It makes you extra cuddly,” he giggles.

You blush, not sure how to respond until he hooks his fingers beneath the waistband of your shorts.

“May I?” San asks, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes please,” you say, raising your hips to help him. He ends up taking your underwear off as well, a somewhat sheepish smirk on his face.

“Sorry,” he says, his tone rather unconvincing.

You roll your eyes as he spreads your legs, his eyes going face to face with your heat.

“Can I eat you out?” he bluntly asks, his warm fingers opening your folds.

“Please,” you say, letting him position your legs better as he immediately licks your folds, kissing your clit.

You let out a soft whine of pleasure, falling back onto your bed and allowing yourself to relax. San continues to suck on your clit, feeling your arousal start to drip onto his chin as you clench around nothing. Before you could beg for more, San’s tongue enters you, lapping up your arousal and easily hitting the spots that make your orgasm begin to quickly grow. San’s nose rubs against your clit, and he smirks as you grind against his face.

“San~ Sannie~ ah~” you moan, causing him to chuckle softly. The vibrations make your toes curl, and you gasp and grab the sheets.

San reaches up and takes one of your hands in his, gently squeezing it in reassurance as he continues his ministrations.

As you start feeling closer to your orgasm, San stops. He stands up, causing you to whine.

“Don’t worry, I’m not done yet,” he says with a gentle laugh. San opens the drawer where you kept your sex toys and lube, and he takes something out you can’t quite see.

“What color are you?” he asks.

“Still green,” you assure him, trying to smile for him.

San kisses your forehead before going back down on you, this time putting his fingers inside of you. He turns on the bullet vibrator he took on a low setting and presses it against your clit, smirking when you groan his name and buck your hips.

“God, you’re so sexy like this,” he murmurs, kissing your thigh.

You whimper in response, boosting his ego. San turns up the setting on the vibrator, relishing in the power he had over you. He was glad he could help you feel better, even if it was only temporary. Which he hoped it wouldn’t. He wanted his words to have comforted you.

“I’m close-” you begin, your toes curling and thighs shaking.

San immediately pulls his fingers out of you and turns off the vibrator.

“San, what the fuck?” you whine. You weren’t being bratty; you were just confused.

“I promise I am still doing this to make you feel good,” he assures you, setting down the vibrator. “What color are you?” San asks.

“Green,” you admit, causing him to smirk and go back down on you.

After being denied twice, the coil built into a strong pressure, causing you to furrow your brows and whine out his name, being more vocal than usual. You almost feel overstimulated, but he holds your hips in place with firm hands so you can’t escape.

“San, fuck, I’m gonna- fuck!” you nearly sob, suddenly orgasming harder than you have in the past.

He lets you ride his tongue through your orgasm before he pulls up, a confident smirk on his now rather wet face. “I made you squirt,” he says proudly.

“I-?”

“Squirted, yeah,” San smugly confirms, standing up and sauntering to the bathroom. You’re not sure what he is doing in there, but he soon comes back with a dried face and a damp washcloth.

“I want to keep going,” you sheepishly admit.

He nods and cleans off some of the mess, tossing the washcloth into the hamper. “Let's take off the blankets then, yeah?” San says, helping you stand as he strips off the blanket.

You sit back down and look up at him, pulling him in for a kiss when he comes back. “I want you inside me,” you say softly, tugging at his pants.

“Be patient, you will,” he assures you, pulling away to undress himself.

His self-control never failed to surprise you because as soon as he got rid of his clothes, his hard length stood erect.

He hovers back over you, laying you down and kissing you sweetly. San grinds against you to test how sensitive you were. When you shivered, he stopped, continuing to gently kiss you.

San pulls away after a moment in order to align himself with your entrance. “I love you so much,” he tells you, sliding his tip in.

“I love you too, San,” you assure him, gasping as he continues to enter you, stilling only when he was fully seated inside.

“See, your tummy is even bigger now,” San giggles, rubbing your tummy.

“Are you trying to get me to say you have a big cock?” you giggle.

“No, but I wouldn’t be offended if you did say that,” he responds with a giggle of his own.

“San, please move your big cock,” you tease a little, laughing softly.

“As you wish, princess,” San teases right back, beginning to move at a comfortable, intimate pace.

You move your hips in tandem to his thrusts, gasping softly as he brushes your g spot.

“I’m so lucky to have you in my life,” San says, praising you sweetly. “You’re an amazing person, and I can’t believe you love me back.”

You feel yourself blushing, unable to say anything besides soft moans and whines.

“You’re so beautiful. Like this and any other time. You’re always beautiful,” he assures you, reaching down to start rubbing your clit.

You grab onto his bicep that was holding him up, whimpering his name.

“Good girl,” San groans, reaching down to capture your lips in a kiss. “Go ahead and cum when you need to, don’t hold back,” he adds, picking up his pace ever so slightly, knowing you were growing close.

“I- oh, fuck,” you whine, your nails digging into his bicep as you orgasm.

He continues to thrust through yours, and San soon releases inside of you.

“You couldn’t wait for me to get here?” You hear Wooyoung cry indignantly.

“How long have you been there?” San asks, pulling out of you and cupping your cheek before rolling onto the bed next to you, giving you a view of a very irritated and flustered Wooyoung.

“Long enough to start getting hard,” Wooyoung complains. You glance down to his crotch, and there was a definite tent in his pants.

“Well, this wasn’t the original plan,” San begins, and you are quick to look at the floor, taking great interest in the carpet suddenly. “Y/N was feeling depressed and very insecure about her body, and it just happened to lead to this,” San explains, leaning back and crossing his arms.

“You did?” Wooyoung asks, his eyes snapping to you.

You don’t look up at him or say anything, but you nod a little.

Wooyoung doesn’t say anything, but you know he walks over in front of you. His fingers grip your chin and tilt your head up. “I asked you a question,” he says, his eyes hard.

“I… yes…” you say, sounding uncertain of yourself.

Wooyoung raises an eyebrow, waiting expectantly.

“I… don’t like myself?” you tell him, your words coming out as more of a question than a statement.

“Y/N,” Wooyoung says, trying his best not to sound disappointed. “You’re an amazing person. The best partner we could ask for. I don’t know what exactly is wrong, and I would love to talk about that later if you want. But I love you so fucking much, okay?” Wooyoung’s eyes were a little glossy, and you could tell how much he meant his words. He wanted you to feel better.

“I know… I love you both too…” You say, holding onto his arm before leaning up to give him a gentle kiss.

Wooyoung holds you close, deepening the kiss. “Is it okay if I have a turn?” he asks you, his hand resting on your hip.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” you whisper, rubbing your noses together.

“I love you so much,” Wooyoung says, mostly to himself. He then asks, “Can I be rough?”

“Yes, I’ll say if it’s too much,” you assure him, Wooyoung and San both nodding.

Wooyoung is quick to undress and is soon guiding you onto all fours. He spreads open your legs and cheeks, watching San’s cum drip out of you. “You didn’t use a condom with San?” he leans forward and whispers into your ear.

San shrugs, knowing it didn’t matter since you were all clean and you were not likely to get pregnant.

Wooyoung pulls back and smacks your ass. “I love the sight,” he groans to himself, teasing your entrance as he smacks your other cheek. “I love how your body reacts to me,” Wooyoung says, grinning as you arch your back up, trying to get him inside of you.

“You had San, and you need more?” Wooyoung teases, slowly entering you.

“Yes, I need you too,” you gasp out, getting fistfuls of the sheets as you hold them to keep yourself up.

“Good,” Wooyoung grunts, beginning to harshly thrust into you.

“You’re making such a mess with your pretty cunt,” Wooyoung laughs a bit sadistically.

“Just for you, just for you both,” you manage to get out, angling your hips so he would hit your g spot.

“You’re such a good girl for us both, and you’re so fucking perfect,” Wooyoung groans.

San scoots up closer to your face, tilting up your chin to look at you. “You okay?” he whispers. “Color?” He knows Wooyoung could get a bit carried away at times, so he wanted to check.

“Green,” you choke out, your arms giving in on a particularly strong thrust.

Wooyoung slows his thrusts and grabs your hair, pulling you up and moving his hand to your throat. “You’re beautiful, Y/N. We are so lucky to have you,” he whispers, rolling his hips into yours.

You nod a little, your orgasm building again. Wooyoung hums softly and starts thrusting faster, grunting softly in your ear before he decides to suck colorful marks onto your neck and shoulder.

“That’s our girl,” he murmurs, reaching down to rub your clit as he squeezes your neck.

You gasp, your thoughts going blank from the slight lack of oxygen to your brain.

“Go on and cum on my cock, princess,” Wooyoung urges you, biting down on your shoulder as he squeezes your neck a little more, searching for his release.

At the slight increase in pressure, your body explodes, and you cum, your fluttering walls encouraging Wooyoung’s orgasm.

He lets up on your throat and clit, thrusting a few more times to ride out your highs. Wooyoung pulls out of you and helps you lay down, cupping your cheeks.

“How are you feeling, baby?” Wooyoung asks, cupping your cheeks.

You’re zoned out, blissed expression was a dead giveaway of your state, as you felt high and floaty.

“Damn, if I had known you were going to come and fuck her like that, I wouldn’t have made her squirt,” San says with a sigh, getting up.

“You did? Without me here to watch?” Wooyoung groans.

San shrugs, heading into the bathroom and drawing a bath.

You watched the two, not quite able to make out their conversation.

When Wooyoung picks you up, you gladly lean against his chest and gently hold him. He leads you into the bathroom and sets you in the tub, which San had filled with a bubble bath. Wooyoung kisses your forehead, and San squeezes your hand, saying something.

San stands up and sighs, looking at Wooyoung. “Don’t leave her alone like this. I’ll wash the sheets,” he tells him.”

Wooyoung lets you play with the bubbles and soon gently washes your hair. “You’re doing so good,” he says, rinsing out your shampoo. “Our pretty girl,” Wooyoung adds, smiling. “Turn a little to face me, and I will wash off your makeup~” he says, putting the cleanser oil on his hands.

“Okay!” you giggle, turning and closing your eyes.

Wooyoung is gentle as he massages the oil into your skin, singing to you softly. You hum along with the tune, letting him rinse off the oil and use your regular cleanser.

“Are you ready to cuddle?” San asks, coming back into the bathroom and now fully dressed.

“Cuddles~!” you say, nodding immediately.

Wooyoung giggles and unplugs the drain, readying a towel.

“I have your favorite pajamas ready for you,” San says, smiling.

You let out an excited squeak, reaching out to Wooyoung to help you up. He gently grabs your arms, helping you find your footing before beginning to dry you off.

“Will you finish her up?” Wooyoung softly asks San, wrapping you in the towel before picking you up.

“Yeah, go clean yourself up,” San says.

Wooyoung kisses your temple and goes to the bathroom, and San helps you into your pajamas.

“You pretty princess,” he says, pulling on your pink pajamas.

“Mhm, your princess!!” you confirm, nodding.

San smiles, plugging in your hairdryer.

“You are the prettiest princess I have ever seen,” he assures you, brushing your hair before adding essence to it.

“Then you’re my… prince?” you ask, glancing up at San as he picks up the hairdryer.

“I’ll be whatever you want me to be,” San assures you, turning on the hairdryer and drying your hair.

Before San finishes drying your hair, Wooyoung returns and lays on the bed next to you, rubbing your back.

Once finished, San unplugs the hairdryer and turns off the light. Wooyoung pulls you under the covers, holding you in his arms. San joins you, kissing your cheek.

“I love you,” Wooyoung murmurs.

“We love you,” San corrects him, smiling.

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sugawara-sweetheart · 4 years

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I am on my period rn and I am straight up not having a good time. Could i request ennoshita and oikawa headcanons on how they would take care of their girl on their period. In need of some snuggles rn 💞😔

aww babie i hope you feel better soon!! i did this asap because i think it counts as a comfort request hehe💓💓i hope this helps to cheer you up!!

s/o on period headcanons | ennoshita & oikawa

ennoshita chikara:

this caring boy notices something’s wrong when he sees you cradling your stomach one day whilst hanging out

once you tell him you’re on your period, he is immediately ON IT

goes to the shops to buy you pads/tampons BUT buys you ones with wings that are extra discreet and night time ones aww

he also buys you some extra cute things that might help you feel better like some bath bombs and scented lotions

ennoshita understands that you might feel a bit down so he encourages you to wear comfortable clothes and styles your hair, tells you to wear some makeup even if your skin isn’t the best and he paints your nails for you, all with an affectionate, adoring smile on his face

if you have bad pains, he will always make sure you have plenty of heating pads stocked up and he will give you back and shoulder massages

cooks you the most nutritious meals to make sure your iron levels don’t go down and makes you cut down on caffeine

buys you your favourite chocolate but limits it as a treat because too much is unhealthy

tells you you’re beautiful every moment he can

gets a bit worried if one of your symptoms feels extreme so you have to assure him it’s normal to which he’s shocked

“wow, you’re are so strong.”

has a menstrual cycle app on his phone that links to yours so he’s always prepared to know when your period is coming up so he can care for you

oikawa tōru:

okay i’m not going to lie, this pretty setter doesn’t even realise you’re on your period till he’s trying to tickle you one day and you’re like STOP

and poor confused babie is like what’s wrong, thinking you now hate his very existence

so you explain you’re on your period to which the situation gets even worse because he’s like...a what now?

*texts iwa-chan “what’s a period? isn’t that just punctuation?”*

anyway, once you explain how you feel, oikawa feels very sympathetic towards you and immediately asks you what he can do to help

“we’ll deal with your period together, y/n. it’s uterUS, not uterYou.”

he will love to cuddle you, always making sure you to have a hot water bottle and a blanket prepared and he will hold the hot water bottle over your stomach. when you finally move it away, he replaces it with his hand to stroke you caringly

watches all your favourite movies with you and buys you magazines with horoscopes and quizzes in so you can do them together whilst having an at-home spa day because he wants you to feel fresh and beautiful whilst on your period

bans you from eating bad foods because he reads online it can make cramps worse but gives in when you want chocolate

buys plenty of chocolate and you both snack on them together but then after he scolds you for eating so much of it

if you get sad, oikawa will coo at you and call you his baby but if you get angry, this petty boy will get sassy but it won’t last long

definitely goes to buy you pads/tampons also buys you baby diapers as a joke

*gets hit in the face with diapers* “ow, y/n-chan!”

does try to keep up with your cycle but often forgets so he asks you to notify him when you’re on your period so he can make sure to show up at your home on the first day with a care bundle

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tcfkag · 3 years

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Project Peanut

Since I’ve made it FB official, I figured I’d share it here too.

Monotasker and I are having a baby! Project Peanut is proceeding well with a healthy baby and (surprise!) a healthy gestational carrier (or surrogate) as well! We hope to come in on-time and with ten fingers and ten toes in late-June of 2021.

If you’d like to learn more about how we got here, read on below. But...

TL:DR; Monotasker and I have a very exciting summer coming up thanks to Monotasker’s brother and absolutely remarkable wife (our SIL) who are giving us the most amazing gift in the world, a child. The world feels like everything is falling apart but our how is that we wil remember 2021 as the year that Monotasker and I are going to be parents for the first time. And @alaric-greyson will become an uncle and my parents will be grandparents for the first time, though we have a gaggle of younger cousins so they’re well prepared for this.

Longer story about our journey with surrogacy after the break:

Monotasker and I didn’t actually start down the IVF/surrogacy path on our own. Because of my health, getting pregnant could have killed me. We had come to terms at a certain point that we weren’t going to have biological kids. And while we’d talked on and off about adoption, we weren’t sure if it was right for us. We wanted children but we were also honest with ourselves about the realities of our situation. One of the many ways that Monotasker has been a great husband; he has never made me feel guilty about this. While we both were able to experience grief in our own ways, it was never a question that we made the right choice to be together. It was just another curve in the road of our life together.

But, during Christmas of 2018, my husband’s brother and our sister-in-law sat us down and made an offer so huge that it would never have occurred to us to ask; SIL and BIL had discussed it and were willing to be our surrogate if we wanted. It still makes me tear up thinking of that first talk. It was almost like an out-of-body experience. The closest comparison I can think of is someone donating one of their kidneys to you. Sure, they have another kidney (or in this case, my adorable niece) so it may not seem like as big a deal to them, but if you have zero kidneys, it is the biggest deal in the world.

Thus began a long (and let’s be honest, expensive) process that had several bumps along the way. The doctor at the IVF clinic, who was great, strongly suggested that we use an egg donor because even just extracting the eggs would have been dangerous for me (and besides, my DNA is nothing to aspire to) and I think he was surprised when we agreed pretty easily. But the truth was that we’d already been thinking about using a donor. He just confirmed our concerns about the egg-harvesting procedure and the potential complications for a patient like me.

But, that also meant adding another step to the process. Picking an egg donor was one of the weirdest experiences I’ve ever had. It was almost like some kind of bizarre version of online dating. It took four tries for us to get an egg donor who was a good candidate to donate and showed up to her appointments. (Eventually even the nurses at the clinic started feeling bad for us.) But, in the end, the fourth (and final) egg donor we chose, the one who worked out, was actually the best fit. She listed Ruth Bader Ginsburg as her personal hero! That’s when I knew it was fate.

Even after we finally got the eggs, finished having the embryos fertilized, tested the embryos for viability (including additional tests looking for certain genetic issues that made conception less likely), and everything else we could do to “load the dice” - so to speak - to help make implantation successful. It was early-2020 before we had the best, most viable embryos frozen and ready to go. It was, in fact, March of 2020 when we had an appointment with the doctor to discuss The Next Steps (i.e. more testing for our surrogate, a cycle of injection hormones, and then implantation). We had hoped to schedule an appointment ASAP. In March or April. Of last year.

So three guesses what happened then?

We were finally able to fly up our SIL from her home state in October (which was luckily the lowest our local numbers were all year) for a 24-hour trip to have the implantation done at the IVF clinic up here. It was amazing how simple the procedure actually was after all that.

Obviously, we knew we had pretty good odds of the implantation working; we had, as I mentioned, loaded the die as much in our favor as possible but, deep down, I still felt sure that something, anything else could go wrong. That it just wouldn’t work. That we’d be left to decide whether a second cycle was worth it. How much could we continue to ask for from our SIL after she’d already “leased” us her uterus for SO long! I know that my experience with health and wellness is skewed, but I always assume the worst until I’m proven wrong. But I tried not to project that same energy onto SIL who is way more zen about all this than I am.

But this weekend we had something of a come-to-Jesus moment about just how soon our Peanut will be joining us in this world -- and how much more we have left to do to prepare. So if you have good tips on Must Have newborn stuff or tips on having a newborn through surrogacy or adoption (or in anyway where you weren’t the one who carried the baby to term). I’m not worried too much about it, but I’d love to hear people’s stories about how they bonded with the baby and if/when the nesting instinct set in. Or when you had YOUR “oh shit, this baby is really happening” moment.

#pregnancy #surrogacy #gestational carrier #pregnancy announcement #Project Peanut #TCFKAG IS the Mama

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janicho88 · 4 years

Text

In This Together

Pic originally posted by jrackles

Pairing- Dean x Wife!Reader

Word count-9825

Summary-The reader hasn’t been feeling well and is afraid to go to a doctor, because of her medical history. One thing seems to lead to another, but she has her husband Dean to lean on. This is AU

Warnings- Sick reader, Little bit of language, A little angst, and maybe a little fluff, slight implied smut. Possible triggers talks of multiple surgeries some are a little descriptive, talk of possible loss of fertility, female problems.

A/N This is my first fic I have finished. I have had some things going on, I needed someone like Dean, this was the closest I could get to having him. It is unbeta’d all mistakes are mine. @winchest09 and @katehuntington you two are absolutely amazing!! Without you two, your virtual lockdowns and the people I met because of them, I never would have had the confidence to finish this let alone post it. Thank you!

You sighed as you rolled over in bed, time to get up and start another day. Although you were hoping today was different. You were hoping the pain you had been having which couldn’t decide whether or not it wanted to be in your side or abdomen would actually be gone. Something that had just been in your head. You had felt a kind of off for the last 2 weeks but had kept that to yourself.

“Morning Sweetheart,” came from your husband of four years, as Dean walked back in your room fresh from the shower. A quick kiss good morning before he finished getting dressed and you headed to get yourself ready in the bathroom. Soon you were both out the door and off to work. Dean was a partner in his father’s mechanic business. It was doing well for him; he’d even added on auto parts store next door. You were running your family’s restaurants, your parents slowly cutting back on their day to day involvement, but not leaving entirely yet because you were going to need their help in the new year.

You enjoyed your mornings at work, for the first few hours it was just you preparing things for the day, your radio playing softly your only companion. It wasn’t long before your daytime employees came in and the lunch rush began you all working as a team everything going smoothly today. It was while working on clean up and the dinner prep, one of your workers, and your friend, Donna found you in a back corner with your hands on your right side. When she asked what was going on, you told her you were fine and went to finish the task you were working on. Before she left Donna passed by your office where she saw you inside with a look of pain on your face again, your ringing phone interrupted her from saying anything to you then.

Dean beat you home from work and was preparing hamburgers to grill when you walked in. You set your things down and met him in the kitchen for a kiss, “Hey Babe, how was your day?”

“Good. The new guy, Gabe, I was telling you about should work out well, might be a little bit of a smart ass. Benny seems to have taken him under his wing to show him the ropes. Those two will be interesting together. How were things at the restaurant today?”

“That’s great! I know with your Dad, and Bobby cutting back their time there you wanted at least one more person in. Work was fine, late lunch and steady afternoon which is why I’m later getting home.”

“How’s the foot doing? You’ve been on it more with working longer hours lately.”

“Okay, as good as it’s going to be for now.”

You two enjoyed a quiet dinner, then curled up on the couch to watch a movie before heading to bed. Dean noticed you didn’t eat much of your dinner, but he figured you were either tired or grabbed a snack at the restaurant.

Your next morning started off about the same both of you on your separate ways to work. It was afternoon when Donna saw you again with a grimace on your face and a hand on your side. A little while later she saw your running to the restroom where you threw up.

“Alright, spill Y/N. What is going on, you’ve been a little off lately?”

“Donna, I’m fine.”

“Bull, lady. Do I need to call Dean and ask him?”

“NO!” Your head went back, and your eyes closed as you thought about what you were going to say. You went with the truth, maybe she would tell you what you were hoping, it was nothing. “I’ve been having a sharp pain in my right side, sometimes it moves to the front and is in my abdomen. Every once in while it might go lower. It’s probably just a sore muscle or maybe the ulcer is coming back”

“And the upset stomach?”

“That’s new-ish. This is nothing, I’m fine. It can’t be anything.” You almost whispered.

“You should probably talk to your Dr. Maybe your OB first, given your history. That’s what your worried about right?”

With tears in your eyes you gave a soft yes.

“Call them, and then talk to Dean. Knowing you, you haven’t said anything to him, and were going to keep pretending nothing was happening.”

You walked away to call for an appointment. Donna was right, you were scared, and you hadn’t told Dean. You didn’t want to go through this again. Around year and half ago you were at a girls day out when you just didn’t feel right. You attributed it to worry you had about something at work. It didn’t go away and over the next two weeks things got worse. You weren’t hungry, you had a sharp pain in your side, had started burping and not been able to stop it. That one bothered you the most. Then you started getting sick. Overall, you just didn’t feel well. You figured it was early February now, you just had a good old-fashioned winter cold. When you suddenly had trouble drawing a deep breath and it hurt to breathe, you had gone to a walk-in-clinic. They thought it was your appendix or gallbladder and sent you to your primary Doctor the next day. They agreed and sent you to a CT Scan the next day. Dean went with that morning and waited while you went back for the test. You were told your doctor would have to results in a few days while they were getting the test started. When they finished the scan, they told you to stay on the table they had a radiologist coming to read the scan right then. That hadn’t done much for your nerves. They told you something about a mass on your ovary and kids still being possible, but you needed to see your OB asap. You had walked back out to Dean in the waiting room in shock, not 100% sure what had happened in the last few minutes. You had ended up having a cyst on an ovary, which had destroyed that ovary and continued to grow into what your doctor called a giant mass. It had gotten so big it was pushing on your other organs. They had to go in and take it out. You were getting to the point you were okay with that part, but the doctor kept talking, and you kept squeezing Dean’s hand harder. They couldn’t see the uterus around the mass and didn’t know if it had damage or the other ovary, and there was a possibility it was cancerous. Suddenly the kids you and Dean had been talking about and picturing, might only ever be that, talk. You had been a wreck the morning of surgery, but Dean was in pre-op with you as long as he could be holding your hand telling you everything was going to be fine. It didn’t matter what happened with the surgery. If it was just the two of you, or if you ended up adopting. You were in this together. He loved you and the two of you would be just fine. The surgery had gone well. They only had to take the mass out and the tests came back cancer free.

Things between you and Dean were good. The last year and half had been crazy, no kids yet, although that wasn’t due to lack of trying in the beginning. The December after your surgery you had ended up with a stomach ulcer and they found a fibroid on your uterus. You really couldn’t catch a break. Your doctor had wanted to put you on birth control to slow down the growth for now. Here you were, once again worried that you wouldn’t be able to give Dean the baby you knew he wanted. His brother Sam, and his wife Jess had had their first child a few months prior and Dean was the loving uncle. Holding little Jake, he could calm him down faster than anyone but Jess. He spent a bit of time telling him all about Baby, and the things he would teach him when he was older. You were fairly certain he might get that boy in trouble with a few things, but that could be dealt with in a few years. You knew Dean was hoping for the day he would be holding his own baby, and teaching them, you were afraid you were never going to be able to give him that.

You were sitting on the couch when Dean came home from work.

“Hey Sweetheart, how was your day?”

“Fine, how were things at the shop?”

“Good, busy. Dinner smells great.”

“Thanks, it’s got about a half hour till it’s done. I know you want to shower, but can I talk to you first?”

“Always.”

Dean joined you on the couch as you started explaining. “So I’ve been feeling kind of off lately, not quite right. Pain in my side and abdomen. The last few days throwing up if I ate and drank much. It’s a bit like before.”

Dean moved closer and held you as he asked, “Are you thinking you have another mass, the fibroid, or something else?”

“I don’t know, and that scares me. I want it to be nothing, but we both know my luck isn’t that good. I have an appointment next Wednesday with my OB/GYN. I figured it would cut some of the middle wait time out.”

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“Thanks, but I think I will be ok alone with this first visit.”

“Wait, don’t you have your foot appointment that day?”

“Yes, but it’s in the morning.”

Wednesday your appointments finally arrived. You had been having trouble with your foot for a few years now, it had gotten so bad you couldn’t even wear a tennis shoe anymore. You actually were supposed to have surgery on it a few years ago, the same year you had found the mass and had to have that removed instead. It was a pretty simple appointment; they did updated x-rays since you hadn’t had any in over a year and talked again with the surgeon about what surgery would entail. He was a foot and ankle specialist at the University hospital. This was going to be your third foot/ankle related surgery but the first on your right foot. You had had different doctors each time, and you like this one the best. He was extremely knowledgeable and easy to talk to. You may have been nervous for this surgery, but that was because of everything it was going to involve. You were born with as the doctors called them extremely high arches. It had caused you a number of problems over the years, sprained ankles, multiply breaks, and your two other surgeries. They were going to go in and break your fifth metatarsal and put a plate in there and realign it, cut the Achilles tendon and lengthen it, you had tears in the Peroneal tendon which had to be fixed and then attached to the Brevis tendon to strengthen it, ligaments on the inside and outside of the foot needed to be tightened or loosened depending on the side. You had had all of that done nine years ago on your other foot, but because of problems you had with that first surgery they were taking it a step further. They were going to cut the bones in your heel and realign them. That part was making you the most nervous. You would be spending the 3 months following surgery on crutches, possibly longer. You had spent enough time on them over the years, you were pretty good on them at least. You had been planning on the surgery happening in January, you couldn’t put it off any longer.

The worst part of all this has been the not knowing because your mind is great at making up worst case scenarios, you were a bit worked up for your afternoon OB appointment. You and your doctor talked and going over your symptoms he was sending you for a CT scan the following week because he thought you might have a kidney stone based on some of your symptoms. He also ordered an ultrasound to check on the fibroid. They don’t do anything with fibroids until they are over 4 cm and causing problems. When yours was found it was at 3.3 cm, so they had just put you on birth control. The doctor talked about what could happen if it was the fibroid. You might need surgery to remove it, if it was to big, they might have to take the uterus out or there were shots out that put you in menopause for a while. You were due back in his office in two and half weeks to go over the tests. More waiting, just great.

Dean had dinner waiting for you when you got home. You explained the tests the doctor wanted and what he told you he was thinking. You never thought you would be in a spot where kidney stones were an option you were hoping for. You two spent the evening on the couch watching movies compromising on your choices. Since Halloween was coming soon Dean wanted a horror movie, you agreed if you watched that one first and ended your night with The Proposal. That way your mind wasn’t on a horror movie just before bed.

The next week went fairly quickly and your tests were done you were just waiting on follow up. You and Dean both busy at work during the days. You had lost a manager, you mom had been taking on a lot of caterings which kept her out of the store, and Donna couldn’t pick up more hours because she was taking care of her sister, Jody’s daughters at night. All this meant you were working open to close three to four days a week and at least 8 hours the other days. You would get home at night and not want to move from your couch. Friday morning you were doing your prep work when you received a call from your doctor’s office. They had both of your results in. They didn’t find kidney stones; the fibroid had doubled in size and there was a mass on your remaining ovary. Your follow-up appointment with them was 10 days away, but they wanted to see you as soon as you could come in the next day they were open, which was Tuesday. The last surgery you needed was like that, everything done asap. You had found out about the mass and a week later you were in surgery.

You hung up with them and called Dean in tears. Your mind automatically going through worse case scenarios. He did his best to calm you down and tell you everything would be okay. You two were going to be alright. You called your mom when you hung up from Dean and filled her in on your results. Making yourself get back to work.

Being a Friday, you had a busy lunch rush and had a bit of clean up and more prep work to get ready for the dinner rush. You were working in the back when the door buzzer went off notifying you of someone coming in. Donna called you to the front saying a customer needed your help. The first genuine smile you had all day coming to your face as you took in Dean standing there with a bunch of colorful flowers.

“Oh Dean, they’re beautiful! Thank you!”

“Not half as beautiful as you Y/N, how are you holding up sweetheart?”

“I’ve been better. It’s going to be a long weekend waiting to see what he has to say. My mom talked to my cousin who does some work at the hospital, a friend of hers works for an OB/GYN who has been around awhile and is the only one in town who does this surgery robotically. I have an appointment with him next week also for his opinion.”

“It’s all going to work out, no matter what it’s you and me together. I have to get back to work and I know you do to, I just wanted to stop in and see how you were doing.”

“Thank you, Baby, I appreciate it so much. I love you.”

“Love you too Sweetheart. I will see you at home tonight”

When you weren’t at work, you and Dean hung out at home over the weekend. He did his best to take his mind off of your upcoming appointment. You greatly appreciated his effort. Before you knew it, Tuesday afternoon rolled around. This time dean accompanied you to the appointment. The doctor explained that the fibroid was now at 6.7cm and was what was causing your problems. He was really pushing these shots you take once a month that put you in menopause for six months. He told you that it would shrink the fibroid, and that would be best to start with. The other options he was giving you were waiting and getting another ultrasound end of December/early January and coming back then or go in and do surgery sometime. You weren’t sure how you felt about either of those options but were glad he wasn’t going in right away to take out the uterus. What did frustrate you the most, was how the call on Friday made it sound like things were worse and you needed to come in asap for something to be done, and the doctor wasn’t doing anything right now.

You and Dean both felt a little calmer when you left the office. “What are you thinking about your options, Darling?”

“Honestly, I’m not so sure about those shots, I would need a lot more information on them first. The whole being put into menopause has me nervous. That’s not something I ever thought I would be thinking about at 31. When I talked to the nurse on the phone Friday she made this seem so much worse, and he’s not doing anything other than the shots now. I guess we’ll see what the other doctor says tomorrow.”

The next morning you and Dean were at the other doctor’s office. New patient paperwork all filled out and you were waiting to go back. Your cousin’s friend called your name and took you back. She had been talking to your mom, so she knew what was going on and had shared it with the doctor. You asked her opinion on the shots, and she just shook her head. She told you there wasn’t any guarantee it would even work, and there was a lot of risk with what going into menopause could do to you and your chance of having a child. You would have to sign a number of documents that said you didn’t hold that company responsible for any of the large number of side effects.

“I wasn’t sold on them before, I’m really not know” you told her and Dean.

The doctor came in shortly after and did quick exam. You had asked his opinion on what to do, he said taking it out would be the best thing to try and preserve the uterus and a chance for you to have children in the future. Yes, you could have a child with a fibroid on the uterus, but as big as it was it could cause problems. It didn’t end up being a long appointment because he was called away for a birth. He did order 2 tests and you set those up before leaving. One was another ultrasound to check where the fibroid was and if that would cause any problems itself. The other was to check the uterus for any cancer spots, they did warn you that one could be painful, and you weren’t going to want to do much after the test was done. You had those both scheduled for the following Tuesday and Wednesday.

As you walked out to your cars you asked Dean “What did you think of him, and everything said?”

“They are both pretty against the shots, and I know you didn’t really like the idea of them either. You cousin said he has more experience, right?”

“Yes, he does. I’ve talked to a few others that know him, and they all like him. Donna’s aunt was an OB and she referred patients to him if it was something she couldn’t do.”

“Ultimately Y/N, it comes down to what you think, and what you want to do. We can talk more at home on your thoughts and see what these tests say. I will support your decision no matter what.”

“Thank you, Babe. I love you. Have a great day at work.”

“I love you too. I hope you have a great one as well.”

You were talking to Donna at work about everything that you had found out. She had spent a little time working in her aunt’s office and at one point had been premed in school, you valued her opinion.

“You need to get it taken out girly, it’s already grown a lot on you. I know how much you and Dean want kids. If you wait too long you run the risk of losing that chance.”

“Part of me knows that, but the other part of me is worried about what is going to happen during surgery.”

“That’s understandable, any surgery there is a risk. This doctor has done thousands of these, you’ll be fine, most importantly you’ll be better. Don’t ignore this, Dean and you can adopt if you can’t have kids, Dean won’t be fine if he loses you. Don’t do those shots, there is a lot of risk with those, and you could run into even more problems.”

“Those shots are pretty much off the table, I really don’t like the idea of them. I know your right, a part of me just really doesn’t want more surgery. The last week the pain has gotten worse so I don’t know that I can put this off.”

“I know Sweetie, surgery makes anyone nervous. This will all work out.”

“Thanks, Donna, you are an amazing friend.”

After dinner that night you and Dean were sitting in the living room and you decided you weren’t going to think about any medical issues. While he had the game on you grabbed your computer and recipe binder. Settling next to Dean on the couch you pulled up Pinterest and Christmas recipe ideas. You had been scrolling for a few minutes when Dean looked over at your screen.

“What are you looking up Christmas for?”

“Mom and Dad’s Christmas party is a month from tomorrow, and I need to get my baking list around.”

“What do you mean a month away, that’s before Thanksgiving?”

“With Thanksgiving being so late this year, they are doing it the Saturday before. That way it has less chance running into other Holiday parties. You don’t want to do it Thanksgiving weekend, and then there are only three other weekends before Christmas and there will be a bit going on. So I need to figure out what’s on my baking list this year, what’s staying, what I’m adding.”

“It’s too early to talk Christmas.”

“Hallmark starts Christmas movies this weekend, Saturday has some of my favorites we can watch after work!”

“It’s not even Halloween Y/N, I’m not watching Christmas movies!” Dean threw his head back against the couch turning slightly to glare at you.

“You say that now, we’ll see what happens when I get that remote,” you smirked. “I could happily watch them year-round.”

“Ehh, your getting better with that. You used to be into Christmas songs and movies 361, the couple days leading up to Christmas Eve and sometimes that morning you were a little bah humbug saying you were done with all of it. Then the day after Christmas you start singing Frosty again.”

You just glared at him for a minute, “It was the stress, and trying to get everything just right and make everyone happy. My shopping will be done, before 2 days before Christmas this year. I’m going to enjoy it, no stress.”

“Sure thing, Sweetheart, whatever you say. We’ll see how you are on December 23rd.”

“Going back to the Holiday of the month we are actually in, Sam wanted to know if we wanted to come over Thursday night. See Jake in his first Halloween costume, hand out candy to the Trick-or-Treaters. Mom and dad are going to be there too.”

“Sure I’m in. It’s usually a busy night for us so I will be over after I can leave work.”

“Okay so we have my usual baking items: Sugar cookies I think I’m going to keep it simple and just do drop cookies instead of cut outs, buckeyes, peanut butter blossoms, no bakes, petit-fours, truffles, cranberry bars and the varieties of chocolates those I’ll make with mom. Now I need to figure out some new ones. Hey what do you think about, hey, where are you going?”

“I need a beer if we are going to talk about your crazy Christmas baking list.”

You waited for Dean to settle back next to you to show him your finds.

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923042596801/

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923042596805/

“You’re on a Grinch kick this year aren’t you? You mentioned a few weeks ago you wanted a Grinch sweatshirt this year.”

“Maybe, part of me is. Anyways thoughts? What about these?” https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923042556919/

“Ooohhhh, Do you think I could make these?” https://www.pinterest.com/pin/174584923040748115/

“We aren’t going to be using our kitchen to make actual food anytime soon are we? I love you and you are very talented when it comes to your baking but I don’t know if you have the patience for those cupcakes.”

“You’re probably right, it does tend to run thinner when I’m trying to get all this stuff done. Look on the bright side, the party is early this year so I will have the kitchen back to normal sooner.”

“Sureee you will.”

You weren’t going to admit it to Dean right now, but you were trying to force yourself into the Holiday spirit. With everything going on you weren’t sure you were going to be in the celebrating mood this year. You knew how much he loved the Holiday, and the time with family together. You would put on a happy face for him.

Dean took you to your appointment Tuesday afternoon, because they didn’t recommend driving after since you were going to be in a bit of pain. It wasn’t even a five minute test to go take a swab of the uterus lining to send in to check for abnormal or cancer cells. They were right though, you definitely hurt after. You and Dean picked up food on the way home so neither of you would have to cook or clean up. He got you situated on the couch with a heating pad after you got home. You two spent another quiet night in. The next afternoon you took yourself to your ultrasound. The results for both tests would be back in time for your appointment the following Tuesday.

Thursday was Halloween, and you were short handed at work again, but not as busy as you were expecting to be. You left around 7 and headed over to Sam and Jess’ house. 5-month-old Jake was dressed up in a cute duck onesie. After saying hi to the couple, your husband, and his parents you grabbed some food and settled down with Jake. You were told you just missed Cas, his wife Kelly, and their son Jack. The one year old getting cranky and ready for bed. Jess and Mary joined you shortly. The guys were watching one of the All Saint’s Day movies. Apparently having a little one to get excited about put Sam in a better Halloween mood then he usually was in. Mary asked how you were doing; Dean had apparently told her a few days before and Jess had just found out tonight.

“I’m alright, it’s been going on over a month and I think at this point I want a plan. I want to know what’s going to happen. But I want to make sure that we decide on the right course of action too.”

Both ladies assured you they thought you would be fine, and that everything would work out for you. Your attention turning to the little boy on the floor in front of you.

You spent your weekend working and had started some grocery shopping for you baking supplies. Those supplies then found a home on your kitchen counter. So Dean was right, he was slowing losing the kitchen for a little while.

Tuesday afternoon saw you and Dean back in your new doctor’s office waiting to be called back. It wasn’t a long wait and you headed back. Thankful your tests had come back normal and the new ultrasound didn’t show any new problems. Because of the last surgery you had there was to much scar tissue in your abdomen for the surgery to be done robotically, and the fibroid was too big. You did have the option for another procedure, he described it as resetting your uterus. He did tell you it wouldn’t do anything for the fibroid, but it could get your periods back under control and might lesson some pain, you would need a few days off work. The best chance you had if you wanted to get pregnant sometime was to have the fibroid removed. Now you just needed to make a decision on what you were going to do. You were leaning toward surgery and when you didn’t make a definitive decision the doctor told you to come back in 2 weeks. When you were checking out and scheduling the next appointment you asked how far out the wait for surgery was. His calendar was filling up and he only had December 9th and 23rd open.

On your way home you and Dean talked about what you both were thinking. You told him you were leaning toward surgery, and he also thought that would be your best choice. Now you just weren’t sure you really wanted to wait. If you called your first doctor, he could do the surgery in two weeks, he just had to wait for insurance purposes. Honestly, he was never busy. That put you the day before your parents Christmas party or waiting till the next weekend which was the day after Thanksgiving. Another problem you had was making sure you had help at work. Right now, you didn’t have the help to do it. If you pushed it too far into December it was going to be a problem with your foot surgery. They had said with your stomach because they were cutting it open you would need to be careful not to tear your stitches for a few weeks and be limited for 6 weeks with what you could do. Crutches weren’t going to be a good thing to mix in.

Your parents, you and Dean all talked. You didn’t have the help to do the surgery in November, December wasn’t a good idea because of your next surgery. You decided if the doctor thought you could wait you would do the foot surgery in January and then six weeks later when you should be able to start putting some pressure on your foot you would have the other. That way the six weeks you needed to be careful with the second surgery would be ending in time for therapy in May. Work was going to be getting better help wise because you were selling on of your locations. The gas station next door to one of them wanted to expand and the only way they could was if they bought your property. That deal was supposed to close first of January. Your foot surgery was scheduled for the 16th. Things seemed to fall in to place for that all to work out.

You still weren’t feeling the best, but you were glad to have noticed you didn’t have the pain in your side and stomach every day anymore. It had turned into just having really bad periods every few weeks.

When you went to your appointment two weeks later you went alone and talked to the doctor about your thoughts and timeline. He didn’t think that would be a problem, telling you before he left that removing it was your best option. They weren’t’ scheduling yet for February or March so they would call you when those books opened.

If you were honest, you were feeling better with what you had decided on. Also, the fact that no one was worried enough to say you had to get in right now for surgery. You were still going to worry between now and surgery it was just who you were.

It was the third week of November, your new focus on the upcoming Holidays. You had already started your baking, freezing everything once it was made cooled and put in an airtight container. The list was still shorter this year it only had about 15 things on it. You didn’t get the Grinch recipes made, or the snow globe cupcakes, but you did make the thumb print snowmen. Next year. Two days before the party you moved on from baking to getting the food you were doing around. In between all this also trying to help your mom decorate their house and putting decorations up at yours. You didn’t end up doing as much to your house as you usually would, but just less to take down after and you knew things would be crazy then.

The day of the party both you and your mom ended up being stuck at work longer than you were supposed to be. This meant you had to work quicker when you got home. Dean went to your parents with you to help with the last minute set up. It was nice living on the same street as them, so you didn’t have far to go. With the final cleaning finished you were in the kitchen with Dean starting to get food around while your mom ran upstairs to shower. Your brother and his girlfriend coming shortly after. They had been dating for almost a year, but she didn’t come around much, so you didn’t know her well. Trying to ask her questions about herself didn’t get you very far because she only gave one-word answers. You looked to Dean and he just shrugged his shoulders, not knowing how to get much out of her either. When your mom came back down, and the food was in good shape you and dean went home to get ready and get the desserts.

You always enjoyed this party it was family from both of your parent’s sides, Dean’s family started coming when you two were dating. A variety of your parent’s friends along with your brother’s and yours. You were surprised to see more cars in the driveway when you returned. Cas, Benny and Kelly were in the kitchen talking to your dad and brother, along with one of his old friends from school. It didn’t take long for the house to fill up with people and the sounds of laughter. It was close to one by the time you and Dean went home after helping to clean up. You were beat and ready to fall into bed, Dean not far behind.

The restaurant you were selling, was the store you spent every day at, it had been your baby over the last 8 years. Since you were going to be closing it soon you had cut back on the Sunday hours which meant you and Dean could enjoy a lazy morning after the party. It was nice not to get up and go, you had missed the relaxing mornings you two used to enjoy. When you finally dragged yourselves from bed it was to the kitchen to make a late breakfast of eggs, bacon and toast. You would have to head in to work after lunch, but that didn’t mean you had to be in a hurry to get ready. After cleaning up the kitchen Dean dragged you back to the bedroom where you spent a little more time catching up.

That week was Thanksgiving which meant a shorter work week for you both. Thursday morning started off much like Sunday’s had, although you both had to be out the door by noon and have your food and deserts ready. A late lunch with your family at your grandmother’s house was first. The Y/L/N could be a rowdy group, so it was usually a good time as long as you could avoid any family arguments. After cleaning up there you would head to Dean’s parents where they had an early dinner. You tried not to eat too much at either place for two reasons, one you wanted to be able to move later and two you were trying to avoid being sick. It didn’t hit you as much as before, but you never knew when it would. After the guys collapsed in front of the football game on tv, Mary and Jess hit the adds. You left to go pick up your mom. The last two years you to had done some Thursday evening shopping because you both worked on Friday, and it gave you time just he two of you. You hit the mall and a few stores trying to start on your shopping list. You meant it when you told Dean that everything was going to be done early this year. You were going to enjoy the Holiday season. When you finished you dropped her back at home before going back to your in-laws. A short time later you and Dean headed home.

Much like it does every year December flies by. You hadn’t finished your shopping as early as you wanted, but you weren’t as stressed about it this year. You enjoyed nights with Dean curled up on the couch. You had seen the Grinch more times than you could count this year, I guess you were having a Grinchy year. Before you knew it, Christmas Eve was here. Both you and Dean worked that morning before meeting your families at church for the 4 o’clock service. You had to go early if you wanted a park, and a seat. It was always so beautifully decorated for Christmas, you enjoyed taking it all in waiting for Mass to start. One of your favorite parts of this service was when Father would call any little kids up that wanted to and ask them questions about the religious aspects of the holiday. Where was Jesus born? Your favorite answer this year was Baltimore. What gifts did the baby receive? Cake and ice cream. The answers they came up with were always a laugh. You hoped you would be sending your own child up there someday.

Everyone headed to your parents’ house after, some other family and friends would be joining you. You had dinner and then played games. As you and your cousins had grown so had the games. Jake was the only child present and he wasn’t old enough to understand what was going on. With all the adults playing it could get a little rowdy especially between Sam and Dean. One of your aunts had done that gifts wrapped in a saran wrap ball and it seemed like only those two could make much progress. So of course, when one of them was trying to unwrap the other would give a little trash talk. You had been feeling a little off and would disappear from the room. When the ball was unwrapped, and Dean saw you left again he came to find you. He found you sitting on the steps just outside your parents’ upstairs bathroom.

“Everything all right, Sweetheart?”

“Not really, my stomach is hurting me a bit and if I try to eat or drink I’m running to the restroom because it’s going to make a reappearance.”

“Anything I can do to make it better?”

“Thank you, but no I just need to tough it out.”

“Soon Y/N this is all going to be behind you honey.”

“I cannot wait.”

He held you close as you both sat on the steps for a few minutes softly kissing the top of your head. When you rejoined your family, they were on to a different game. The two of you hanging back to watch. When the time came to leave you were more than ready to head home just so Dean could hold you in bed. You fell into a fitful sleep that night, not feeling all that much better when you awoke.

The two of you were spending the morning at your mom and dad’s and then going to John and Mary’s in the afternoon. Your dad’s mom and siblings joined you for breakfast and afterwards you exchanged gifts. Luckily, you only had to leave the room once. Dean knew you weren’t feeling well so the two of you left shortly after to go home before heading to his parent’s house. When you arrived, you headed to the kitchen to help Mary. The two of you got along really well, you often considered yourself luck in that way. A few of your friends didn’t have the best relationship with their in-laws. By the time Sam and Jess arrived dinner was ready, and you all gathered round the table to enjoy. It was a great night spent with them.

The end of December was quickly approaching, and you hadn’t heard anything from the company buying your story, communication had just stopped. After you talked to your dad, he started making phone calls to the company again to see what was going on. Their plans for the property and been pushed back a few months so they were no longer in a hurry to close. You ended up pushing your foot surgery back there weeks till the 6th of February. Your dad finally got a date out of them you were closing on Monday the 3rd of February, that would also be the last day open. You would spend the next two days moving everything out. The New Year wasn’t even here yet and you knew it was going to be going fast.

Things were going to get busy for you in January, so you and Dean decided you just wanted a quiet night in for New Year’s. At the store you picked up a bottle of Sparkling Cider to toast with, neither one of you big Champagne drinkers, along with a few different appetizers to make. The evening was spent curled up on the couch watching movies, until you switched over to watch the ball drop. Sharing a sweet kiss with Dean when midnight arrived. This was going to be your year. The surgeries would be done soon, you and Dean could move on with the rest of your lives, it was all going to work out and be fine.

You had been right when you told Dean January would be crazy. You spent the month working on cleaning out things at work. The office took a bit of time, dividing up what was going home and what you were sending to your new office. Cleaning out things you didn’t use any more, what you were selling and what was moving to the other location. On top of all that you were trying to keep a relatively clean house and not let everything there fall on Dean’s shoulders. Everyday it seemed like a little bit more left the store and the shelves were slowly becoming bare.

Sunday through Wednesday of closing week was going to be extremely chaotic for you all, so you wanted things at home that needed to be done before surgery finished by Saturday. You cleaned the house top to bottom, rearranged the living room furniture so it would be easier to navigate on crutches, got the crutches ready, finished laundry and tried to stock up on non-perishable groceries so Dean wouldn’t have to go out as much.

The last two days you were open were particularly emotional for you. This location had been your baby and second home for the last 8 years, you had helped with the cleaning, gutting, and remodeling of the building when you bought it. Everything was set up just how you wanted it. When you went back to work in a few months at the other location it was going to be vastly different. Sitting at the closing you were trying to hold back the tears as you signed the papers, part of you wished Dean was there to give you some of his strength but he had to be at the shop that day since he was taking the next 3 days off. Leaving the closing you went to work to open for the last time. That day was extremely busy for your and Donna so many of your loyal customers coming in one last time. Dean came in for a late lunch giving you a much-needed hug, he left after promising to be back before closing. Dean along with your parents came back before closing helping you to clean up and finish making orders. When you turned the open sign off one last time Dean pulled you into his arms and held you while you cried.

“It’s okay Sweetheart. It’s the start of a new chapter, you have a lot of memories to take with you.”

“Thanks, Dean. I know, I just hate goodbyes, and change.”

“I know you do, but it’s a good one. Keep telling yourself that. Closing this story is going to help greatly relieve some stress.”

“You’re right, Babe.”

“Hey! I’m always right. We should probably head home; we have an early busy day tomorrow.”

It was six am when you and Dean pulled back into the parking lot the next day. You had wanted a few minutes without the others around to take care of some of your stuff. By 6:30 someone was there to disconnect the water lines so the pop dispenser and ice machine could be moved. Your parents arrived at 7 and you started loading both of their trucks and the trailer with items going to the other store. Sam arrived and went with Dean in one of the trucks following your mom to go unload. Electricians, and others arrived to get the oven and its components unhooked. You had gone around the day before and put a note on everything stating where it was going, whether the other store, your or your parents’ house for storage, staying in the building or going somewhere and you just didn’t know where yet. The movers were the last to arrive taking some of the bigger equipment for you, this way you guys didn’t have to figure out how to get it on and off a trailer. Dean and Sam arrived back to help load the truck and your SUV. At one-point Dean took one of the “going somewhere” notes and tapped it to your back. It was awhile and two stops later before anyone told you. It was 6 o’clock that night when you put the last load in your car to leave for the day, heading home to unload one more time. By the time it was unloaded your foot hurt so bad you could barely walk, both you and Dean collapsing on the couch not moving till you went to bed.

The next day you had a few more things to get out of the store and had to meet the pop company to pick up their equipment since they couldn’t come the previous day. You left the store that afternoon for the final time. Your OB and scheduled one last ultrasound you had to run and get that done, thankfully the fibroid had not changed from your last one in December. One more grocery store run to stock up for a bit, then home to vacuum and make sure you were all packed for the hospital.

Both your mom and Dean were going with you for surgery, but Dean had an early morning meeting the next day he couldn’t reschedule so your mom was staying the night in the hospital and bringing you home the next day. It was an hour drive and you had to be there at 6:30 for an 8:30 surgery. You went through all your pre-op things and your mom and Dean joined you back there waiting for you to go. Several people were in and out of your little curtain room, the surgeon, anesthesiologist, nurses, and med students. It was finally time to wheel you back after getting one last hug and kiss from Dean and him telling you everything would be fine. A few hours later you woke up in recovery which is where you saw Dean and your mom again. It is also where you found out they didn’t have a room for you, and you were staying in a short-term patient ward. It was almost like a pre-op room, one giant room with 15 curtained off rooms. Actually, the pre-op room was bigger. There was a bed a chair and one of the old hospital TVs that moved. The back of your foot where they did the heal work was bleeding through your after surgery splint and they said it would take a few hours to stop so they propped it up and told you, you couldn’t get out of bed. It only took a few hours for you to be tired of sitting in one spot, as someone who spent all day on her feet this was a struggle. Sleeping in a hospital had never come easy for you with your previous surgeries and adding all the extra noise with so many people around that wasn’t happening either. It was later in the afternoon when you told Dean he should go.

“Babe, you might as well head home, you have an hour drive and there isn’t anything you can do here. Plus, there really isn’t any room in here.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to leave if you need me.”

“We will be fine, I’m not moving, and mom will be here if I need something. Go home get some rest it’s been a long week. I love you I’ll see you at home tomorrow.”

“Love you too, I’ll call you later. Take care Sweetheart. Y/M/N, call me if you need something or anything.” He gave you a kiss and hugged your mom before leaving.

The rest of the evening and night dragged on, when you finally fell asleep that night you woke up almost every half and hour. The nurses were in every hour, and around 2am one of the other patients started screaming because he pulled something out he shouldn’t have. By 5 am you gave up on sleep. One of the doctors came in later in the morning to wrap another layer of gauze around your splint to cover up the blood, and by noon they let you go home.

The next two weeks went fairly quickly, Dean made a good nurse when he was home at night getting you whatever you needed so you didn’t have to get up or try and carry anything while using the crutches. You had practiced on the crutches before surgery, but it is still a little different when you have to be using them. As your family knew well, you were also accident prone and managed to slip and slam your foot down a handful of times. Both your parents, and his would stop over during the day to see if you needed anything or to bring you lunch. The stitches and staples came out at the two-week mark, that wasn’t a fun experience you had never had it hurt as much as it did this time. The doctor wasn’t putting you in a cast, he was going to let you leave in a boot which you would be able to take off if you were sitting with it up or to shower. Thank you for small miracles! The next appointment was four weeks away, the Friday before your Monday surgery.

The next month went fine for you, just very long. You were still stuck at home so things did get a bit boring, a number of new games could be found on your phone and you found a website with fanfiction from your favorite show you started reading. While fine for you, things were going nuts in the outside world, something called Covid-19 was making a lot of people extremely sick, overseas countries shut down and in the U.S., many states were doing the same thing. Your follow up appointment was cancelled and moved to a video chat, then days before it was scheduled your next surgery was cancelled. Stay at home orders were put in place and masks were required for those who had to leave the house.

It was definitely a crazy time and it went on for a few months. 6 weeks after you last video appointment, during the first full week of May, you had another and this one sent you to therapy if you could find someone open. You could also lose the boot and work on losing the crutches. The place you had gone for past surgeries was open and you started back there. This surgery was the hardest time you had to start walking again. There was a bit of pain if your heel hit the ground, so you couldn’t completely get rid of the crutches like you wanted to. The therapist you were working with said with the type of surgery done to your heel, the pain you had with it would determine what you could do and how fast you would get there.

You got a call from your OB’s office, they were given the clear to start surgeries again and yours was scheduled for June 1st, which was two weeks away. You had had a few problems over the last couple of months and just hoped nothing had changed and they would be able to just go in and take the fibroid out no problem. The closer the date got the more worried you became. Dean tried to tell you everything was going to be fine, and not to worry, but you aren’t the best listener. Because of things going on with Covid, you needed to be home the week before surgery as much as possible only going to therapy twice and the grocery store once early in the week to get a few things you wanted. For the last three months Dean had done the shopping, and you were thankful, but there were a few things you wanted to get yourself. Saturday you were going to have to get a Covid test and then had to self-isolate until you left for the hospital on Monday morning. The hardest part of that was going to be sleeping in a different room from Dean, you were even supposed to wear a mask when he was in the same room as you. You had spent the week before rearranging the living room again, then cleaning the house best you could as you hobbled around. Friday night you spent the evening with Dean curled up in your spots on the couch. The closer you got to surgery the more nervous you became.

“Sweetheart, everything is going to go just fine. There is nothing for you to worry about, and no matter how much you worry it isn’t going to change anything.”

“I know, I’m just, I can’t help it. You know how my mind works I’m great at going to the worse case possible. I’ve always wanted kids, and I know you did too, I’m afraid I’m not going to be able to give that to you.”

“Hey, it’s you and me no matter what happens. If we can have kids one day awesome, if not we will look into adopting. What’s not changing is you and me, we are in this together, always.”

“I love you. Thanks for being so amazing, especially during these last crazy months when I couldn’t do much on my own.”

“I love you, too. That’s what I’m here for, you would do the same thing for me. You always take care of me when I’m sick. I will always be here for you.”

“I will always be here for you too.”

Saturday morning you did a few more things around the house before giving Dean a kiss and leaving for your test. It went fairly quick your doctor’s office scheduled you an appointment and you preregistered. You headed home to work on laundry and make sure you bag was packed. That evening you and Dean were watching movies in the living room, although unlike usual you weren’t sitting together on the couch. Sunday was a warm sunny day, so you enjoyed it outside. Monday morning Dean took you to the hospital, you went through check in and then through the routine in pre-op. Just before they took you back you snuck in a quick hug and kiss from Dean.

“I love you, Baby, everything is going to be just fine. I will talk to you after surgery.”

“I love you too, thank you for everything.”

“You don’t have to thank me for anything. We are in this together. Love you Sweetheart.”

Dean was able to stay at the hospital during surgery, but he had to leave after. They weren’t allowing visitors into the hospital, so you were going to be on your own in the hospital for the next three days. Dean headed to the waiting room and they came to wheel you back to surgery. Well, here goes nothing.

Part 2

#dean x reader #sick reader #Supernatural #dean winchester

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the-fandom-fuckup · 4 years

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this time for The Parents

(Disclaimer: this is heavily bullshitted n I have no idea how pregnancies work, naturally or medically aided, so like, whatever doesn't make sense can be attributed to the wonders of quirks I guess)

Honestly there's so much I could say about these three, so many places I could start bc they're basically all I think about

However, I'm gonna start with what created this au in the first place: the quirkbabes lmao

I feel like the first person to bring up babies would be Kiri, after they've settled well into their relationship and careers. They're probably closer to mid 20's when he does his first dip into the topic, putting the idea out there but not expecting much to come from it

Bc he gets it, he totally does! Babies take time and energy and lots of love n care, and hero work is vry busy n vry demanding, where the only guarantee is you never know what's gonna happen that day

So he completely understands their weariness on the topic. But still, he can't deny that the thought of tiny feet terrorizing their halls makes his chest flutter

They don't bring it up again for a while, Kiri giving them time n space to think it over, while the other two have a good long thought n sort through their feelings

And it takes a bit, but they do come together to talk about it eventually. They talk about different options they could use, how many kids they're comfy with having, any hang ups over the idea, etc, n it takes time, but they get everything figured out

Which, of course, is when they start the process n have a wrench thrown in their plans. The original idea had been one child to start, test the waters n see how things go, but maybe they figure out Ochako's uterus isn't strong enough to handle multiple pregnancies n the more they try, the more risk there is to both mother n child

So they say okay, fuck it, we'll have one kid. That's easy enough, right? They sign papers or whatever they gotta do to get started, make appointments with the right people n get the process started for real

Only to have the doctor/quirk user approach them like the eggs took wonderfully, n will take a couple weeks of development before we can implant the embryos into your womb, but otherwise congratulations on becoming parents! N they're excited ofc, but Ochako couldn't help but go umm I'm sorry, you said "Eggs"?? As in plural?? N the person goes yes, your paperwork says that you asked for two eggs to be fertilized, have you changed your minds or..??

Ochako, Baku, n Kiri all look at each other bc obviously someone had fucked up here. But Kiri's vibrating at the thought of not one baby, but two babies n Baku isn't looking as put off as he usually does when someone fucks up, which is telling in its own way

So Ochako takes a breath n asks about any added risks that may come with two babies, n is quickly reassured that anything they could help prevent would not be an issue, n everything should run on course

(Ochako politely doesn't remark how everything so far has not run on course, bc she's nice like that)

So they go fuck it, we'll have two babies. Twins. How hard can it be?

Now I haven't thought too much about what happens during the pregnancy, but it's a given that Ochako puts as much time in during it as she can before having to go off on maternity leave

People try asking her about it n whispering to her like y'know, you could go off early if you wanted, right? It's disgusting that your partners would force you to work like this :/

N that's usually when she gets sick of their shit n snaps back my partners aren't forcing me to do anything, I'm a grown ass woman who can make her own choices n if I wanna come to work I'll fucking work >:(

(That doesn't stop them from trying to stick her on desk duty or cutting her hours. Which, during her earlier stages ofc, she gives her two cents about as well. She may be a workaholic but even she knows doing patrols while heavily pregnant is just asking for trouble)

When she does take the time off they probably don't put it in the media, giving a vague cover of Uravity going off for medical reasons with the promise of returning asap

Tbh they probably try to keep most of their family n personal life away from the media, since Baku would lose his shit over the invasions of privacy, but they don't outright hide it either. It's probably like a Todo fam situation where the public knows of the kids but doesn't have any specific details I guess

The first thing Baku does after meeting and holding his daughter is tear up a little, snort n say "goddamn she's ugly," then softer n with feeling, "she's fucking perfect."

Kiri n Baku do not let Ochako hold the children for a good while after the birth, both of them so wrapped up in the tiny humans they made together that they don't even hear her demanding to see them

They sure af coughed them up after Ochako snagged Kiri's balls in a death grip n threatened to tear them off tho, bc Ochako does not make empty threats n 10+ hours of labour is enough to push anyone to that point.

Ofc Ochako takes time off to recover after her pregnancy, but they decided together that Kiri would be the one to take the big break from work to care for the babies. It'd been his idea, bc he knew how important their work was, how Ochako was still worried about providing for her parents n how focused Baku was on getting to number one

The others were unsure at first, bc Kiri shouldn't be the only one to take care of the babies, but he plays it off as you guys have more responsibilities at work than I do, n I've never really cared for what rank I have. Plus it's not like you won't be helping, you have time after work to do your part, me staying home is just to give them a stable routine n make sure they're getting the attention n care they need. Being the stay at home parent doesn't make me the only parent, y'know?

But also, the other two being at work means they can't stop him from spoiling the little runts rotten, and Kiri definitely takes advantage of that lmao

He loses to pouty lips n puppy dog eyes entirely too often, n he knows he's weak to them, okay? But goddamn they made some beautiful babies and their power is unparalleled. They have him wrapped around their chubby little pinkies n they don't even know it yet

(They do realise this when they get older, however, and perfect the formula for their pout-to-eye ratio that has Kiri cracking in seconds. You'd think with constant exposure he'd toughen up a bit, but time has only given the babes more power. Kiri's doomed)

Having that time off does a number on him tho, n he doesn't really realise it until he's trying to button up his pants to head out n the button pops clean off. He's not super happy about the little pudge he'd developed on his holidays, but finding time to work out n keep track of the kids is tough!

Kiri pouts seeing his belly in the mirror, but Bakugou loves it. Between Kiri's new dad bod n Ochako struggling to lose the baby weight, Baku is in heaven.

He knows how to appreciate a nice belly n loves the way Kiri n Ochako jiggle while doing small tasks around the house, loves the soft weight of it when he grabs a handful during snuggles, n will leave kisses n raspberries at every given opportunity. He plays it off like "It means you eat well n take care of yourself, what's not to like about that?? Get off my dick"

But lets be real, he's not fooling anyone. Kiri n Ochako love the stubborn blush that goes down to Baku's chest when they tease him about it, n if they leave a bit more skin out to test his willpower, nobody mentions it lmao

Honestly this is getting long n I dunno where I'm going with it, just know that I have many thoughts about these guys n I love them dearly tyvm

#BnHA #Kirishima Eijirou #Uraraka Ochako #Bakugou Katsuki #Kirikacchako #Quirkbabes Au #Bakubabes #they're still nameless but hush I'm getting there #I have. so many thoughts about these assholes #I love this family too much somebody help me #I wasn't paying attention to how long this got n now it's a mess lmao #I'm sorry #headcanons

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butterflyinthewell · 5 years

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To autistic people who are starting to menstruate...

Okay I’m gonna go all auntie Cyndi on all my younger autistic followers who are new to having periods. I’ve been having my periods for over 20 years now, so I’m experienced in this.

First off, you may have your first period and not have another one for a few months. Your periods may start and happen like clockwork. Your periods may always be irregular.

It’s normal for your ovulation and menstruation to shift throughout the year just like the seasons shift the sun’s position in the sky.

On average, your period comes about two weeks after you ovulate. I’ve pinned mine down enough to know I bleed exactly 19 days after I ovulate, so I can look at a calendar and figure out within a four day margin of when to expect my period. Note that I said on average, some people may have a shorter or longer menstrual cycle.

You’ll know you’re ovulating when you produce a lot of mucus from your vagina that looks and feels like raw egg white. It’s clear, a little more viscous than your spit, it’s very slippery and it will drip out in long strings. I produce a lot, another person may not produce much. If you notice you’re really slimy down there when you’re wiping after you pee, and the toilet paper comes away with stringy slimy stuff on it, take note of the date you saw that and note the date again when get your period. Keep taking notes and a pattern may emerge. That’s your menstrual cycle.

NOTE: If you have unprotected sex during this time, you have a strong chance of getting pregnant. Sperm can swim a long way and survive a long time in the Fallopian tubes, waiting for an egg to come down. Always assume you can get pregnant between the time of finishing a period and starting the next one.

(And I hope this second one never happens to you, but...)

If you were raped during this time, and if they ejaculated inside you or on your vulva, you may get pregnant.

Always practice safe sex and use birth control if you want to avoid pregnancy, and if you were raped you need to assume they got you pregnant and get help to deal with it ASAP.

Now, lemme tell you a little about periods and autism going together.

PMS and your period can really mess with your sensory issues, your meltdown / shutdown threshold, your tolerance for socializing and your ability to control emotions.

You might have brain fog and just feel yucky and groggy.

You might find you want to sleep more or can’t sleep at all.

You might wake up with your armpits sweating heavily.

You may notice you start sweating with less exertion, or you walk into a warm room and swear you’re standing on the sun.

On the flipside, you may feel colder than usual, so walking into a cooler place will feel like walking into Antarctica.

Your skin may get more oily and that may mean greasier hair and more pimples. I know that feels unfair if you already have a lot of acne and problems with hygiene. If your hair length permits washing your hair in a sink, you can do that if a shower is too much. Try to wash your face gently with a wet washcloth when you wake up and before going to bed. Make sure to remove all your makeup before retiring to sleep if you wear any, because it will clog your pores even more if you don’t.

Your body odor may intensify, so keep baby wipes and deodorant / antiperspirant around if showering is hard. Hand sanitizer wiped on your pits can help in a situation where you realize you reek and can’t wash off, but only use that in emergencies.

You may experience some constipation and gas. That’s progesterone’s fault, sometimes it slows down your colon.

You may go from constipated to having huge, greasy poops or even some diarrhea. That’s your hormones shifting. Sometimes a period is a natural laxative because your intestines move a little faster thanks to the hormones that make your uterus contract (prostaglandins) to push out the endometrium. So if you have issues with fecal incontinence, you may have to deal with extra odors and messes when you change your incontinence protection.

Once your period starts, you’ll probably have to pee a lot more often. This is your body getting rid of the water it retained. If you deal with urinary incontinence, this might mean you need to change your incontinence protection more often to avoid infections, skin breakdown and odors.

Btw, you can dehydrate a little as your body sheds the excess water, so make sure to stay hydrated. I take three small sips or one big gulp from my water bottle after I use the bathroom during my period. It’s a helpful routine.

You may have food cravings and appetite changes. You may feel always hungry or not want to eat much or at all. Your desire to samefood might increase. (Mine is currently the cheese pizza flavored Cheez-Its.) Increased hunger is your body getting ready to lose nutrients through your menstrual flow. If you don’t feel your hunger signals, notice if you feel irritable or weak more often, it may mean you need to eat.

Your boobs may get a little bigger and get achy-feeling, so much that you can’t stand a bra or binder. You may get achy feelings in your joints or muscles. It’s likely water retention.

You may put on some weight. This is also water retention. You may find you always gain around the same about of weight each time you’re close to your period.

You may be really impulsive or take risks you wouldn’t usually take, sometimes to the point of recklessness.

You may feel restless like you want to climb out of your skin. Your frustration threshold might plummet to nothing, so everything is aggravating.

If you have self injurious meltdowns, you may have more SIB than usual. You might also notice an increased need to stim, and sometimes stimming doesn’t help you feel better or calm down.

If you’re physically able, try to do something that makes you exert yourself, like jogging, moving heavy things or some other kind of vigorous exercise. Even dance is good if that’s what you enjoy. Think of it as venting excess energy so it’s not stuck in your chest.

If you’re not physically able to exert yourself, try snuggling under a weighted blanket and pressure stimming. Think of it as drawing excess energy to where you’re putting pressure so it’s not stuck in your chest.

You may have mood swings and default to a certain mood so much that you feel stuck in it.

If you’re prone to migraines, you’re more likely to have one when you’re premenstrual.

All of this can be scary if you’re still new to having periods.

See a doctor if your bad feelings are so bad that you get super depressed and have suicidal thoughts two or more periods in a row, It could be PMDD, which is the nasty older sister of PMS.

PMDD is premenstrual dysphoric disorder, or a very extreme version of PMS.

It’s kinda normal for PMS symptoms to vary in intensity from month to month, but if you find yourself consistently in a very bad mental state before your period, you may need extra help to handle it.

Once your flow starts, you might have bursts of feeling REALLY good or affectionate: that’s because of oxytocin and maybe some serotonin, enjoy it.

Your flow may be fairly light, get heavy and then lighten again. You may start with a lot of gushes and then it lightens up until it stops. If you normally have a light flow and suddenly it turns heavy with an increase in cramping, there may be a problem that needs a doctor to check out. If your heavy flow gets even heavier, to the point that you’re soaking through the thickest pads, there may be a problem. Don’t let them blow you off, be firm. “I don’t normally bleed this much or have this much cramping, something is up.”

Things like stress, weight gain or weight loss can affect your period. Being sick can sometimes throw it off. Periods are fickle, annoying and weird things. Keep track of them, take note of the color and amount of your flow and get to know it. Knowing your body at its baseline will help you recognize it later if something goes wrong. It may take your cycles time to find their “normal” as your body figures out how to handle having periods.

It never hurts to always have a pad, tampon, menstrual cup or whatever you use to catch your flow. Keep it in your backpack, purse, pocket, etc.. If you prefer pads, it’s always a good idea to put one in your underwear if you’re expecting your period and you go out somewhere. That way it won’t be a huge emergency if your flow starts. Putting one in when you go to sleep at the time you expect your period flow can also help you sleep easy and not worry about making a mess in your bed.

(I personally prefer thick pads, so it feels like I won’t leak, but I know that may be a sensory yuck for someone else. Try different things till you find what works.)

Those little gushes you feel occasionally are normal. Yeah, sometimes you will feel your period goop coming out. Some advice: when you’re using the toilet, push a bit and then do a kegel, which is squeezing the muscles in your vagina that stop your pee from flowing— you might push a lot of period stuff out. It’ll help you not have to change your pad as often.

I’m cis, so I can’t speak on how taking testosterone will affect periods. I will leave this open for an autistic person who is taking T to add to this if they want. 👍🏻

Now that I said all that, it’s possible you may have zero premenstrual issues and your period won’t cause you much trouble at all. Every uterus-owning body is different. People already dealing with depression or other mood disorders may have more trouble during their period, or their period may even boost their mood for a short time. As I said, everyone is different.

❤️ Take care! ❤️

#actuallyautistic #actually autistic #autism #asd #tw rape #tw pregnancy #tw menstruation #tw suicide mention #food mention

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redrebecca · 5 years

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Do you have some Shawn writers that you can recommend to us? Love your writing ❤️

Yes I do!!! And ty❤️

@shawnm521 is my one of my favourite writers on this site, hands down and I know it’s cheesy, but her work was the main reason I started writing for Shawn. The amount of times I find myself re-reading her masterlist is definitely into double figures but I physically can’t stop? So do yourself a favour and read everything she’s written.

@fourtristattoos I think it goes without saying that her creativity is off the charts. Not only that, but her talent and descriptions and just her overall style of writing has me blown away no matter how much I read her stories. So think of any au, and I can guarantee she has it in her masterlist. You want boxer!shawn? She’s got it. You want secret agent!shawn? She’s got that too. She even has a series about Shawn as a king with white hair, like what more could you want??

@softboyshawn another writer who has an amazing imagination and a talent to put that aforementioned imagination into words. Her long fics are the best thing ever (go and read Building Affection and you’ll see why)

@dylshoney I know she’s not as active anymore but holy shit, her masterlist is gold dust - like everything on there is peak writing talent. So if you are coming to shawnblr, reading her writing is what I would consider to be compulsory.

@sauveteen okay okay go and read her writing now, and scroll through her blog to see the most crackhead-ish posts about random shit or Liverpool FC (it’s football season so prepare yourself). But like, her writing? Amazing and hilarious and unique and either heartwarming or heartbreaking and once you’ve read it feel free to add to the list of adjectives bc my brain isn’t working atm :/ (a co-writer of yfyf - an important title)

@shawnjpeg another Liverpool FC (and peaky blinders) obsessed blog. I remember reading “Make Up Your Own Storm” and although I now have a fear of sleep paralysis, I loved it so so much and it’s definitely one of my fave pieces ever. (also an aforementioned co-writer of yfyf)

@sunrise-shawn a super duper underrated blog. Her writing is the cutest, wholesome-est and purest thing and it makes my heart melt every single time I read it. “Cute Alphabet” and the blurb that goes with it is a must read. Not only is she talented but T is so sweet and lovely and please feel free to go and rant about seasoning to her.

@honeyrosemuffins let me start off by saying that “Wrong Words” k i l l e d me, like it physically hurt. The amount of emotion this girl can convey through her writing is something I am so so jealous of.

@pinkk-peonies is another one of my favourites. I love her writing so much and my love with doctor!shawn was started with her headcanon. Also her masterlist theme is to die for.

@agentunwin her 30k assassin Shawn fic is amazing and you need to read it asap, because..wow. I think she writes for Taron as well as Shawn if you’re interested in that!

@smallerinfinities is the writer of my favourite series! Gin and Juice is so so good and I reread it a lot. But she’s also got other great works so go and read them as well. An extra bonus is that if you send her a “🐄” she’ll provide Shawn pics - what’s not to love?

@egertom although she doesn’t write for Shawn anymore (I think?) she is so talented! Like, read any of her masterlists and you’ll see. My favourite Shawn fic is “If I cant have you” and if you like Tom, KAQ is an actual masterpiece that you really need to read.

@ificanthaveu “A Baby’s Intuition” was a hard blow to the uterus I’m not gonna lie, but wow it was so so gooood. I need to catch up on her masterlist because her new series looks great and I can’t wait to read it!

Also @someoneunimportantxx @ruinhoney and @2dreamcatcher8 are super sweet and reblog lots of fics so if you don’t already, you should follow them!

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ecofinisher · 4 years

Text

The Adventures of Super Nathan 3 - Chap 10

Chapter 10

https://archiveofourown.org/works/23301076/chapters/57155008

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13531960/10/The-Adventures-of-Super-Nathan-3

https://www.wattpad.com/871340254-the-adventures-of-super-nathan-3-chapter-10-the

Two weeks later Lila sat in the waiting room of the Gynecologist looking at her smartphone through her Facestargram profile seeing funny images shared by her former classmates. Above the smartphone screen appeared a dark box with the word Nathy, followed by a heart and the information of the smartphone. You’ve got a new message.

“Which level are you? 2 or 3?”

Lila typed down the number and sent it to her husband, afterward on the entrance to the waiting room the door got opened and it was Nathaniel, which held his smartphone in his hand and placed it back in his jacket.

“The bus got a bit delayed” Nathaniel explained.

“It’s fine, it’s also taking a little long here” Lila answered watching Nathaniel sit down beside his wife looking at her, which smiled at him and gave him a hug. “Thanks for coming”

“Is it weird for me to feel nervous?” Nathaniel asked feeling Lila plant her lips on his cheek.

“No, I think you’re just excited about the appointment” Lila explained. “Or did something else happened while you got here”

“No, I just stressed myself to get here ASAP”

“That wasn’t necessary” Lila mentioned, then into the waiting room, a woman doctor appeared with a dossier in her hands.

“Lila Kurtzberg?” The doctor asked watching Lila get up along with the redhead, then she accompanied the couple into another room and sat down together.

“Good, you��ve told me you were pregnant for eight weeks, am I right?” The doctor asked earning a nod from the brunette. “Have you felt anything strange as usual?”

“No, I just feel like I’m experiencing the similar pain I feel during the period” Lila explained. “Haven’t felt anything strange yet”

“Okay, so that’s good for now and your pain in the uterus. Is it manageable?”

“It’s okay for now” Lila answered.

“Yes,” The woman responded noticing down the minor piece of information the Italian woman gave her. “In case you feel insupportable intensive cramps around your abdomen I inform you already to pass by the clinic again just to be safe,” “Thank you”

“How do you spot the difference?” Nathaniel asked Lila, which shrugged her shoulder.

“I think it would be obviously more painful” Lila answered making Nathaniel swallow hard. “Come Nathy, you don’t need to worry about this. I’m already doing everything to keep our baby safe,”

“It’s good for your baby to have such a worrying father” The doctor complimented making Nathaniel grin a little embarrassed. “If you don’t mind, I’d like to do the ultra scan sound on you Mrs. Kurtzberg,” The doctor asked earning a nod from Lila, which followed the woman to a room across the bureau and Lila lied down on the chair next to the device, that is used to do the ultrasound scan. The doctor pulled another chair from the other side of the room close to Lila so that Nathaniel could sit down and see at the screen along with his wife.

The doctor grabbed a tube with gel, then pulled up Lila’s shirt to see Lila’s small baby bump and spread the gel all over her belly.

“The other days I feel like it’s not notable, but now I can see it” Nathaniel mentioned gazing down at Lila’s belly making her smile, then held her hand up at the man, which noticed it afterward he widened his eyes as he found out, what she meant and he gave her his hand admiring her.

The doctor placed the ultrasonic transducer on Lila’s belly and moved it over it while observing at the display various shades of gray.

“This kind of inspired me to paint something alike” Nathaniel mentioned exchanging looks with Lila, which gave him a courteous smile.

“Do you see this bean-like shade here?” The woman asked earning a nod from Nathaniel and a more eagerly from the Italian. “Your baby is right here and it is doing well so far” The woman explained making the couple smile and Lila pecked her husband on the lips.

“That’s great” Nathaniel answered, then he remembered to ask something. “Oh, and can we already see the gender?”

“I can’t to 100% tell the right answer, but the only thing I can show you is the heartbeat” The doctor mentioned changing a few options on the screen of the machine and under the image of the interior of the uterus appeared a line with middle-sized waves and a vertical line showed up on the begin moving forward as the sound of the baby heart was played. Lila beamed in excitement followed by Nathaniel, which had a dumbfounded face expression having it hard to believe, what he was listening to.

“That’s…...I…..Lila…...it’s….amazing” Nathaniel babbled, while Lila glowed in love with the sound of the embryo inside her.

“And the heart frequency is also good” The doctor mentioned looking at Lila, which had tears in her eyes, then covered her face getting all emotional with the situation.

“Wow, I haven’t seen her this emotional” Nathaniel mentioned a little surprised. “Are those mood swings?”

“It’s possible” The doctor answered. “The first months she’s going to act a little thin-skinned. She’s going to get sad about every little thing, angry or overly excited. You have to know it’s a little hard to deal with and she can’t stop this by herself. The best thing is just in different situations to act right”

“I try” Nathaniel responded placing his hand on Lila’s shoulder watching her and he leaned his forehead on her head.

Adrien stood along with Jin, Ettore and Rory in front of the cooling shelf of the supermarket looking for anything to eat for lunch.

“Hey is anyone interested to share the Tiramisu with me?” Ettore asked looking at the guys next to him.

“I think Jara loves Tiramisu, so far I know” Jin mentioned earning a nod from the Canadian.

“Wow there’s Coleslaw Salad,” Rory mentioned taking out a plastic package with the salad.

“Has anyone of you tasted poulet-curry salad?” Ettore asked looking at the group.

“I did two weeks ago and it was good in my opinion,” Adrien answered watching the friend take out the package, which from afar seemed to only contain curry sauce in it. “Looks from here like a lot of sauce,”

“No, I can see a few bits in it” Ettore mentioned. “But I hope it’s worth the five euros”

“I can’t decide between the Olivier Salad and the Pasta salad,” Adrien said looking at the two different salads on the shelf.

“I’ll be heading to the bread section. I think a bun or two with these would be nice” Ettore stated walking away from the group.

Jin widened his eyes and grabbed a pack of cheese rosettes and move a little further on the corridor, where he encountered cold coffees and took a dark-colored cafe latte out leaving Adrien back with Rory.

“Oh, these cheese slices are due tomorrow. I could take this and make a sandwich out of it” Rory mentioned looking at Adrien, which took out the Olivier salad. “With Salami it will be perfect” Rory said doing the chef kiss, making Adrien chuckle.

“Good, I’ve decided to pick this, cause it only had two days of expire date” Adrien mentioned. “One thing less thrown away”

“But I thought it gets donated” Rory mentioned earning a nod from Adrien.

“I think it does, but probably not everywhere or everything”

“I think looking every day for the expire date is hard”

“At least in a large store” Adrien added crossing in the next corridor his way with a tan-skinned man and the same Japanese man he met the other day on the bus.

“Oh, it’s Adrien” The Japanese began. “That’s the guy I talked about”

“We meet again Raiden,” Adrien said. “Weird how suddenly we start crossing our ways”

“It’s a good thing, cause I wanted to ask you at some point if you had thought on my offer” Raiden began watching Adrien think about the chat he had with his girlfriend. “And?”

“Sure” Adrien answered. “I just thought on, if Kagami was home today, maybe you could pass by”

“That would be cool” Raiden agreed rubbing his hands together. “I’m totally sure she would like it, that us two would get along or even the three of us”

“As you say” Adrien answered rolling his eyes, while Raiden smirked at little sardonically. “Give me your phone number in case I need to push this off for another day” Adrien suggested unlocking his smartphone holding it to Raiden, where he saw Adrien’s background picture, which contained himself holding Kagami behind his back and the girl had her arms around his shoulders exchanging looks with the blonde smiling at each other. Raiden growled a little bothered with the image, then Adrien pressed on the green call button and on the plus symbol on the display to add a new contact, then Raiden typed down his smartphone number and added his full name on it and clicked on the green tick to save his phone number.

“Thanks” Adrien answered neutrally and opened his smartphone and sent him a thumb up, making Raiden’s phone beep. “You’re going to see it?”

“I know it’s you” Raiden answered directly making Adrien look not impressed with the man’s attitude.

“So we gotta go. Our friends are waiting for us” Adrien mentioned earning a nod from the raven-haired man and Adrien passed beside Adrien along with Rory, which glanced back noticing Raiden’s body posture during the walk look angered.

“Who is that?” Rory asked watching Adrien look at him a little pissed.

“It’s that one jerk, that beat me in fencing a few years ago by cheating” Adrien explained. “I don’t know, if you remember, I told this about a year ago to all”

“Oh yeah, he was also the one to attack you in the restrooms, right?” Rory asked earning a nod from the blonde. “What is he doing here?”

“Apparently he’s on a language stay here and wants to make amends with me after meeting me on the bus”

“Maybe he really wants to be on good terms, how many years is that ago?” Rory questioned seeing Adrien show the age with his fingers.

“You know…..he wished me luck before our tournament this year…..in a bizarre way….but maybe he’s trying to change”

“Give him a chance and help him out,” Rory told the friend. “It will be the best for you two”

“Sure I try,” Adrien answered watching Rory pat him on the shoulder and move forward leaving Adrien back. Adrien picked up his smartphone to see a message from Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

“Hey Adrien. How are you? I’m inviting you to pass tomorrow evening at Mrs. Couffaine’s houseboat for dinner and cake. I would love to have you and Kagami around. Please answer this until tomorrow night. Greetings, Marinette Dupain-Cheng”

Adrien tapped on the side of his smartphone with his fingers thinking about it, then he typed down a short answer.

“I hope we can make it to it. I need to change a shift with a friend to be able to go there” Adrien sent the message afterward and walked the corridor down following a brown line on the ground, which leads to the bread section.

#miraculous #fanfiction #fanficton #wattpad #ao3 #archieve of our own #ecofinisherfanfics #ecofinisher #tomatofox #lilarossi #nathaniel kurtzberg #nathanael kurtzberg #adrien agreste #fanficupdate #fic update #original characters #pregnancy

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