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writingwhimsey · 2 years

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A Valentine's to Remember

Be My Valentin Content Creation Challenge Day 13- Finding a new tradition for Valentine's Day.

Hosted by: @xxsycamore and @chaosangel767

Fandom: Ikemen Sengoku

Character: All warlords (minus Kicho, I haven't forgiven him for what he has done in Act 2, I don't care how pretty he is) and Ava (my OC/MC)

Slight crack fic-ish. If you've read my previous works, this is similar to Who's your Sengoku Santa. Just had some fun with this one. I hope you enjoy!

A Valentine's to Remember

Warlords, a monk, a couple of ninja, enemies and allies alike, had all gathered in secret. They had all gathered for one imporatnt reason. Only one thing could bring all of these men together.

"We all know why we are here, yes?" Nobunaga asked, taking command of the room.

"Of course." Shingen replied, looking at Nobunaga coldly. "We all received gifts from the beautiful goddess."

"Sasuke, you and Ava share the same original time, correct? Do you have any idea why she made us all these gifts? And with these odd shapes and colors on them?" Mitsuhide asked.

"She said these weird shapes are hearts." Motonari said, holding up the cloth handkerchief Ava had given him, embroidered with an arrangement of flowers and the "hearts" she had worked on.

Each of the men there had received similar gifts from the princess. The colors of the flowers and hearts matched the colors the men typically wore.

"That would be correct." Sasuke said. "I believe that given that it is February, these gifts are Valentine's Day gifts."

"Valentine's Day?" Kenshin asked.

"You see, in our time it is a holiday that is used to celebrate love." Sasuke explained.

"Love?" Hideyoshi asked.

Sasuke nodded. "Yes, these hearts are also used to symbolize love in our time." He continued explaining. "Usually the holiday is for celebrating romantic love, but given that more people are remaining single, more types of love have come to be celebrated. Such as the love you might feel towards family or dear friends."

"I see." Nobunaga said stroking his chin.

"So, these gifts from Lady Ava are her way of saying that she loves us?" Mitsunari inquired.

Sasuke nodded. "Yes."

"Why would she do that, though?" Yukimura asked. "It's not like any of us celebrate this Valentine's Day thing...well except you, Sasuke."

"I myself have never really celebrated it." Sasuke replied. "Until coming here I haven't had anyone that I was that close with."

"The thing that remains is, we all have to come up with something now to show the lass how we feel about her." Masamune said. "Even woo her."

"Are you suggesting a battle for Ava's love?" Kenshin asked, his eyes glinting and hand going to rest on his sword.

Masamune grinned. "That's not exactly what I had in mind, but I'd be happy to give you the battle you've been craving."

"Now this is a show." Motonari quipped.

Sasuke sighed. "Not at all the kind of battle, please Lord Kenshin."

"Killing all of my enemies is the best way to ensure I can have Ava to myself." Kenshin remarked.

"An excellent plan, my lord." Kanetsugu said. "Eliminate your enemies and you will surely win."

"Except that that would upset Ava." Sasuke reminded them. "It would surely break her heart to see people she loves killed."

Kenshin grumbled unintelligibly and removed his hand from his sword and picked up his sake cup.

"I am not opposed to wooing my goddess and letting her know exactly how I feel." Shingen said.

"We definitely have to come up with something special for the princess." Keiji agreed. "Maybe I could write a song for her."

"That would be a good start." Sasuke said. "I think what Ava would appreciate would be if even for one day, everyone could set aside their differences and spend the day together having fun."

"That's impossible." Hideyoshi said.

"Truly, after everything..." Kennyo began, but stopped, when Ranamru put a hand on his shoulder.

"Master Kennyo, it would be for Lady Ava."

"Can you think of a better way to repay her for these beautiful pieces of art?" Yoshimoto asked. "She would get to spend the day with all of the people she loves."

"Are you suggesting a banquet with all of us?" Kenshin asked.

"Yes, that would be good." Sasuke replied. "And I will ensure a large supply of sake and pickled plums for you."

"Ugh, I already have a headache, but I guess since we are all doing it, I will agree." Ieyasu spoke up.

"Alright, but you must tell us of some traditions that are part of this Valentine's Day." Nobunaga said.

Sasuke nodded. "Alright, let's get started."

The group of men then went about gathering everything they could for the party, which they decided would be held in Azuchi's main hall as Ava was still living in Azuchi castle under the care of the Oda forces.

Being the most familiar with the holiday and the only person with his head mostly screwed on straight, Sasuke was put in charge of organizing the party. He broke everyone into groups based on their strengths and giving them each tasks. Masamune and Motonari were in charge of the food. Keiji, Shingen, and Ranmaru were in charge of the entertainment. Yoshimoto, Kennyo, and Mitsuhide were in charge of the decorations. Hideyoshi, MItsunari, and Kenshin were in charge of getting everything and everyone to the castle on time. The rest were told to assist where it was needed, which ended up being in helping Yoshimoto by making more paper roses.

They had gotten the castle seamstresses to help keep Ava busy with a shopping trip in town. Though these men for the most part couldn't stand each other, they had this common goal, to make Ava happy.

As they worked, they actually seemed to be getting into it. Motonari came in carrying a tray of food and looking at the decorations. "The hell is that? Some baby with a bow an' arrow?"

"That is Cupid." Sasuke explained. "Another symbol of the holiday. He is sort of a deity. He goes around shooting people with his arrows and making them fall in love."

"Making people fall in love by shooting them with an arrow? I like that kind of deity." Kenshin said smiling.

Sasuke sighed. "I should have known. I guess you would be a Cupid who stabs people?"

Once everything was in place, they all gathered and waited. A maid was sent to fetch Ava and she soon arrived. Her eyes went wide as she looked at the lavishly decorated hall, covered in paper roses and hearts. She was surprised as she saw all of the warlords gathered there.

"That's a brilliant idea." Kenshin replied.

They managed to continue to work together, getting the main hall ready. They were determined to give Ava a perfect Valentine's.

"What...what is all of this?" She asked.

"It is a Valentine's Day party." Nobunaga answered.

"We wanted to show you our appreciation for your thoughtful gifts to us." Shingen added.

"We thought that a party where you could spend the day with all of us and no fighting would be the best way." Sasuke said.

Ava felt tears stinging her eyes from the sheer happiness she felt. "You guys."

"Come on lass, I made all of your favorites." Masamune said.

"We made them." Motonari corrected. "And I brought some new spices ta make some new stuff. Made some dishes Sasuke said were from yer time."

"This...this is amazing!" Ava exclaimed.

Ranmaru was coming up to Ava and taking her hand. "Come on Lady Ava. We have so much planned for you tonight."

"Yes, we want to thank you for the kindness of your gifts to us." Kennyo said.

As Ava settled in and began to enjoy the food and have fun with her friends, she couldn't help but to look around and wonder. "So...Sasuke you explained Valentine's Day to them?"

"Yes." Sasuke answered.

"And what he told us was that your gifts to all of us indicated that you love us." Mitsuhide said, a teasing smile on his face.

Ava's cheeks reddened. "Well...I mean yes." She admitted. "You're all very important to me."

"And you're very important to us, Ava." Kenshin said. "More important to me than anyone else."

"Don't act like yer more important than the rest o' us, God o' War." Motonari replied. "You don't know what Ava means ta me."

"I already agreed to fight you for her." Masamune said, eyeing Kenshin.

"There is no one here who can claim she is as important to them as she is to me." Nobunaga said. "She saved my life and is my lucky charm."

"Guys, please don't start fighting." Ava said. "I know you all think so much of me since you were all willing to put aside your differences for me for one night."

The warlords were instantly backing down. They were always ready to fight, but one reprimand from her and they were like abashed children scolded by their mother.

"Anything for a goddess such as yourself." Shingen said, giving Ava a charming smile.

Ava smiled. "Thank you guys so much. It really does mean so much to me that you did this for me. I never expected anything in return for the handkerchiefs, but I am so thankful for this. This is the best Valentine's gift I've ever had!"

"Then perhaps we should make this a new tradition." Nobunaga declared.

"A new Valentine's tradition." Shingen agreed.

"I would like that very much." Ava said, happily. "I really do love you all so very much. Happy Valentine's Day!"

#be my valentine content creation challenge #cybird otome #ikemen sengoku #otome boys #cybird #cybird ikemen #ikemen series #ikesen #fanfiction #fanfic #crack #crack fic #ikesen crack fic #humor #tad bit of fluff

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free-martin · 3 years

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What can you tell us about the moon as a whole with its place in astrology? Being that there’s a full moon tonight and all. 🌕

full moon is on monday babe but i will talk about the moon in natal charts since that's obviuosly what you mean. the moon has a ton of significations in other techniques that i could never fully cover.

the moon is your body, ie the sign of your moon will manifest in your physical appearance. it's also your relationship to food.

something i have to get straight here: people say that the moon represents the emotions. this is true. but you have to marry that knowledge to the fact that it is also the body. the moon is the emotions as they are experienced in the full body: anxiety, love, disgust, all of these change the feeling in your entire body. so it is both of these things at once, mind and body, because they're the same thing. the moon is much more influential over the person than the sun in this regard.

so in understanding the moon you need to synthesize these three things: body, emotion, food. food influences your mood. your body needs food, because it is food, it's made out of it, and it becomes food after you stop using it. they are all really the same thing.

whatever sign opposes your moon sign, you find disgusting. for me: libra. this is why i find re-arranging the self to be presentable (as in makeup, clothing, shaving, and so on) to be disgusting. for example, i think women and men who look like this are stomach-turningly repulsive:

these aren't individuals (aries). they are archetypal fantasies of the human form made for universal consumption (libra). too smooth. libra is smooth. moon aries (reinforced by ruler mars in sagittarius: sag is free, lax, bestial) is why women who don't shave and men with long hair make me LOSE control. the aspects to the moon are also imporatnt.

i have no insight into the other moon signs so try sending me a paragraph on things/people you find revolting and your moon sign to help me out. thanks

#astrology

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chisaaki · 3 years

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𝘖𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘩𝘢𝘶𝘭 𝘹 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

───ꪆ

When germaphobic man fell in love with his big enemy

ꪆ───

᯾K. Chisaki ᯾

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Warnings: maybe gross for ppl who hate bugs

ଘ Requested by: Toya_Setsuno (on wattpad)

⸙͎ Reader's gender here: any

Today is the day when Shie Hassaikai have to go on the new mission, go to other mafia named "The Bloody Dollmaker". Boss of the mafia is Amaru, his quirk is actually the blood dollmaker, he can make any doll with his blood, one bottle of peanut-sized blood can make a doll monster that will kill 10 heroes. His group have 10 members, him, you, your son, and others.

Yes, you are the one of them, and your quirk is bugs, the bugs lives in your clothes, and some live inside you, inside your ears, eyes, and other. But not the basic ones, no, the poisened ones, the bugs eho gave you sickness with one bite. Your son is 7 and he is quirkless, like his dad, who died long time ago.

When Overhaul hear about your quirk, he wanted to decline every meeting with them, germaphobia is the only thing that will never leave him. But he have to do this meeting and this deal, it's imporatnt. So he ignore that.

Next day, it's their time to go, Kai, Hari, Mimic and Setsuno, they dressed, and take some things with them, they will stay there for 3 days.

"Are y'all ready?" Overhaul ask impatiently. "Yeah!" Mimic and Setsuno yell and while coming to him, "Yes, just, i need to do my hair" Chrono said and Overhaul look at him with 'you serious?' look.

After he finally finished, they go in the car, the trip took 40 minutes.

When they came, little boy was there, playing with, toys, with you. Chisaki knew how you look, he saw you when he deal with Amaru, he was thinking you are okay, and your son. But when he finds out about your quirk, he wanted to vomit, but he knew it wasn't your fault, he would use his erease bullets on you, just to not have that disease.

Car stops and they went out, you saw them, get up and comes to greet them with your son.

ᝰ ❛ Chisaki POV ❜ ᝰ

There they was, they and their son, poor person, they looks sick, those bugs, they have pale skin, blue mouth, sleepy eyes, and torn (h/c) hair, bugs probably live in there and eating their hair as soon as it is so destroyed. Their son looks tired as well, but he is not like them, but he looks okay

"Welcome again, mister Overhaul" they greet me with sweet smile. And my heart felt warm for any reason. "Thank you, you gotta be Y/N and your son i guess" i said and they nod. "This is my son Aru, baby say hi" they turn to him at last part while Aru hides behing them. Aru wave his little hand to us and Chrono and Setsuno waves back. "Well, you can go in, Amaru is in his office" They said and we nod.

They picked up Aru and he start playing with Y/N's hair and bugs in it, he looks happy playing with them.

'He really love his parent, they are sweet together' i thought.

We came in the big japanese house, it looks pretty normal, clean, and traditional. I liked that.

"Okay, so Amaru's office is-" they started but tiny voice continue "(mommy, daddy, maddy, etc), can i help them find the office, pleasee?" He said with cute face and his parent giggle "Of course honey, just don't bither them and come back, you have to take a bath, okay?" He nod with a big smile on his face.

'I kinda like his parent, they are not that bad'.

"Follow me gentelmans!" He yell and i smile a little under my mask. "So, Aru..." i started and he turned his face to me "yes mister Overhaul? Something wrong?" He asks "No, nothing wrong, can i ask you something?" I asked. "Oh yes, of course!" He smiled, "Nice...well, is Amaru your father?" I asked and his happy face turned in sad look, what did i said wrong? Damn it, i'm bad with children.

"Well, no.." he said with teary eyes "i never met my dad, (mommy,daddy, maddy, etc) said that, he died or something, when i was born i think" his tears starts falling from his eyes. "Oh, i didn't know that, but, you take good care of your parent, right?" He nod "That's good, your dad is proud, don't forget that" i said and Setsuno, Hari and Mimic looked really shooked, i don't know why actually.

We came in the front of Amaru's office. And Aru opened the door.

"AMARU! YOUR GUESTS ARE HERE!" He yell hapily and dark haired man, Amaru, smiled. "Oh, you lead them?" Amaru asked and Aru nod proudly. "Where is that bitch you call parent?" He said laughing and Aru got his sad face again "Can you stop with that? My (mommy, daddy, maddy, etc.) is not a bitch!"

That makes me and the others with me suprised and disgusted, how can he called them like that, and in the front of their 7 years old son.

"Huh, yeah sure, no" Amaru said and Aru looked angrly, Amaru is an idiot indeed. "It's not my bussines but, it's disgusting to call someone a bitch, especially in front of their son" i said and he scoffs "Yeah yeah, Aru, go to that bitch now" Amaru said laughing and Aru left the room agrly with teary eyes. I gritted my teeth under the mask, but i stood quiet.

ᝰ ❛ time skip ❜ ᝰ

Chisaki get mad, he didn't like how doll maker respect others, he isn't that respectful to his own men, but that happen when they deserve it. But disrespecting someone like Y/N in the front of their child, he wasn't happy.

The meeting started, and the boss was more than childish, Kai noticed, but this deal was important to him, so he ignored Amaru's actions.

When they finally finished with the deal, it was time for Chisaki and his men to go home.

They were heading to the door and then Y/N came in with their son.

ᝰ ❛ Chisaki's POV ❜ ᝰ

"Heya" they greeted us with the sweet smile, i felt butterflies in my stomach. "Hey bitch" Amaru said and their sweet smile went to a sad look really quick. Okay, that's it... i thought angrly.

"This deal is over." I said coldly, Amaru doesn't deserve my time and Chrono and Setsuno noticed that, Amaru was shooked but by his face with smir he probably thought i was joking. "You joking, right?" He said, i knew it. "I. Never. Joke" i said about to snap, "Dude, relax" Chrono putted his hand on my shoulder and i calmed a bit, Y/N and their son was really confused.

"But why?" Amaru asked, "Cuz you are the most disrespectful childish man i ever met, and i have no time for you and your acts" i said with neutral look. Amaru's eyes widened.

"How am i?"

"You are disrespecting Y/N"

"They doesn't need respect, they are not important to me" he rolled his eyes and i smirked under my mask.

"Then i'm taking them, along with their son..."

"What? No you can't!" He yelled

"U just said they are not important, and i can do that cuz i did.." he stood quiet and i commanded to Chrono, Setsuno, Mimic, Aru and Y/N to come with me, Y/N and Aru smiled happily, so i did too.

Amaru stood frozen as we leaved.

"Why?" Y/N asked "Why did u do that?"

"Cuz he is an idiot, simple" i replied. "I have no time for children like him, and you always belonged to me, i know that" They blushed by that and Aru smiled wide again.

"HEY, DOES THAT MEAN YOU ARE MY DAD NOW!!??" Aru asked "WHA- HONEY I DON'T THINK SO!" Y/N blushed and yelled and i chukle.

"Well, i really love your parent, so, sort of, we will see soon i guess" i winked at Y/N and they blushed even more as Aru jumped happily.

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Here is the last one for tonight, enjoy and give me more ideas for one shots!

Also sorry for bad grammar in the book.

#bnha #overhaul #kai chisaki #bnha x reader #digital drawing #art #drawing #hari kurono #chronostasis #digital art #kai chisaki x reader #overhaul x reader #chisaki overhaul

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gothicbabydollz · 2 years

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Okay, so I was the biggest Chaol antis and I'm still not a big fan, but I've enjoyed Tower of Dawn.

I know it's terrible to read a whole book about this guy when you don't know what is going on with Fireheart. But honesly, this book is intresting and well witten. I haven't caught myself being bored with it even once.

And there are some details that I was glad I've been able to read myself and not to hear from somebody, beacuse there are madly imporatnt for the plot.

I think you should give it a try.

i really don’t know. i feel bad for wanting to skip but i’m scared i won’t like it as much. And it took me a hefty amount of time to finish Empire of Storms and I loved it the whole way. If i read a book that i’m not invested in….it’s going to take a long time. Which then means it’ll take a really long time to get to Kingdom of Ash. And i don’t like that.

In conclusion, idk what to do and i should’ve read it before empire of storms.

#nonnies ❥#throne of glass

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linkspooky · 4 years

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The Unforgivable One

Someone in my inbox accused me of not treating the heroes like “flawed human beings”. However I think they had a fundamentaly misunderstanding of the way I read characters, both heroes and villains. I don’t see people as good or bad. I see everyone as equally human and flawed. Bad people don’t do bad things because they’re psychopaths, they often do these things for very understandable and human reasons. You can often hurt someone for very normal reasons. Abusers are in fact human too, and often they don’t really see themselves as bad people. Most people are not in fact cackling villains but in fact perfectly normal human beings going through mental gymnastics to justify themselves. So with that in mind let’s take a look at the incredibly flawed human being that is Todoroki Enji. Obvious content warning for discussion of child abuse under the readmore. If you can’t stomach it please don’t read this post for your own safety.

1. Endeavor’s Motivations

Endeavor’s motivations aren’t hard to understand, because they’re basically the same as Bakugo’s his foil. This is something the manga itself has commented upon. Bakugo gives us a view into the mindset of teen Endeavor and likely the attitude that led him to becoming the adult he is.

Endeavor is, in a way, as much of a victim of hero society as Bakugo is. In the fact that Enji has been negatively influenced by a lot of the views of hero society. Bakugo and Endeavor both have incredibly flashy quirks more suited to combat and defeating villains rather than saving people which makes them the ideal of hero society’s quirk prejudgice. People are not born equal, that’s the words that the manga start with, and it’s imporatnt to notice that people like Bakugo and Endeavor are heavily favored by hero society but that too comes with its own unique set of pressures. As hero society is ultimately a very toxic system overall that holds up an unhealthy ideal.

Bakugo is a bully, ultimately. He wants to make other people feel small to make himself feel big. Endeavor is the grown up version of that same bully. However, Bakugo while being a bully Bakugo also has an extremely uhealthy mindset where he is constantly piling up pressure on himself and never really feeling satisfied. A mindset which instead of trying to correct Hero society praises Bakugo for having, and encourages.

Let me explain. Basically, Bakugo and Endeavor are both the living embodiment of “damned by faint praise.” They are constantly being praised and told how special they are because of their quirks. However, while this may have been enough for them early on in their lives while they are little kids they eventually get the sense that they haven’t really earned the massive amounts of praise people give them.

This causes both of them to be struck with a serious case of what most people call “Imposter’s Syndrome”, they don’t really feel like they’re the ones getting praised. They don’t feel like they’ve earned it. This is when one of their first mental traps springs. They decide they have to become the really great person that everyone sees them as. They’re always specifically aware of how short they fall as a hero from the expectations of everyone around them, and they are constantly working to make the difference up.

Endeavor and Bakugo are people who have incredible drive, and also an incredible motivation to improve themselves. This has been stated before by the story several times but none of these are bad traits to have. Wanting to improve yourself. Wanting to live up to everyone’s expectations of you, or even your own expectations of yourself can lead to you pushing yourself to do good things.

However, the problem is for both Bakugo and Endeavor that no matter how much they build themselves up in their head they’re building on very flimsy foundations. Both of them are building towers of sand, or houses of cards. They have a lot of self-confidence in themselves but it’s always fragile. Because they have confidence, but no security in themselves. They are extremely insecure individuals.

They both pile up an incredible amounts of stress and pressure on themselves to be the best, or at least to be as good as they think they should be, but they also both suffer from the two same critical flaws. Number one, they have been taught no healthy ways to deal with this negative buildup of stress. This is once again one of the faults of hero society, if people are strong then nobody around them will ever see them as week.

Bakugo is kidnapped by a villain at the start of the manga, not a single person is worried that he might be traumatized from nearly being killed. Of course not he has an incredibly powerful quirk. He’s strong, so he must not suffer from trauma like the weak kids.

Bakugo is uniquely pressured because he has a strong quirk, everyone around him expects him to be strong at all times and Bakugo himself does not allow himself to show any vulnerability. Bakugo legitimately believes that if he was strong enough, he would never fail, never lose. Bakugo basically doesn’t allow himself to be human in any of the ways that count. Bakugo only sees himself but that’s a double edged sword, when things go wrong the fault has to be with Bakugo, it’s because Bakugo was weak. So, Bakugo has been severely emotionally neglected by the institutions around him including UA, which after Bakugo has been kidnapped by several murderous villains did not think to check if a fifteen year old was traumatized and mentally healthy enough to return to classes.

The second flaw in their mindset is that they are continually forced to prove themselves. They work hard, but feel no satisfaction no matter what they accomplish. Even if they have the most resolved cases, even if they get number one in the tournament. This is because once again, the enormous pressure and expectations they push onto themselves. If a Straight A student gets A’s, it’s not extraordinary he’s merely doing what’s expected. If a C student gets an A that’s an accomplishment. Their expectations are so high for themselves that they can literally never be met, and therefore they feel no relief from the constant piling up of expectations and stress.

This is why Bakugo is fundamentally insecure. He’s not good enough to meet his own standards, and it seems like everyone else exists to prove how small he is. Bakugo sees the world as everyone else looking down on him because he’s so stuck in his own head. Bakugo cannot emotionally process this, and because of that at even the smallest upset he starts crying and acting like a child because he just can’t handle these emotions. He’s unstable, mentally always in a very precarious place.

What Bakugo wants is to feel good about himself. He wants to feel like all his hard work is accomplishing something. However, Bakugo’s self esteem comes not from what he’s accomplished but rather that feeling of being better than others, the societal pressure to be the best, which is why he not only has to be the strongest but has to put others down below him. Not only that, but if he feels like somebody is disrespecting him or not taking him seriously then Bakugo even goes as far as to lash out violently. He literally tried to attack an unconscious Todoroki (who was holding back due ot having flashbacks of his father in the middle of a fight against Bakugo... hmm, i wonder why). Bakugo’s mindset is very insular. Bakugo just kind of assumes that everybody thinks exactly the same way he does, because he’s not emotionally intelligent really to understand other people. So he just assumes Todoroki holding back is an intentional insult against him and gets angry. In Bakugo’s mind it’s justifable to be violent against an unconscious Todoroki, because Todoroki’s the one intentionally provoking him and looking down on him.

Bakugo and Endeavor go through a similiar arc. They both build these giant towers on foundations of sand, only to watch them crumble and be left with nothing. They both realize that they were fighting for the wrong thing all this time.

When they realize they were fighting for the wrong thing, all they can feel is emptiness and their own personal disatisfaction. Bakugo and Endeavor were chasing something they were never really going to have in the first place, because even if they became the number one hero, even if they were the strongest in the world it would never be enough for them. Which means they’ve accumulated all this stress but have no healthy way to deal with it so they vent it out. Literally the only thing Bakugo can think of to do when he’s at his limit is beat up Deku one more time and try to make himself feel strong again and prove that his way of doing things wasn’t wrong.

Bakugo and Endeavor find themselves at similiar points. They both realize everything they were devoting themselves for was wrong from the start, and they were never going to get what they wanted out of life. While Endeavor’s reasons are not necessarily sympathetic, they are at least understandable and human. Endeavor feels like he’s owed a reward for all of his hard work. He wants to feel like he’s someone special and important. Endeavor and Bakugo are selfish yes, but a selfish drive doesn’t have to be a bad thing necessarily. Endeavor and Bakugo are always pushing themselves to be the absolute best version of themselves because they believe in society’s pressure to be the best wholeheartedly. They’re also continually made to feel worse than everyone around them. Their tremendous egos are actually fueld by very small insecurities.

They also much like human beings don’t absolutely think they are right all the time. Bakugo and Endeavor both have hit their limits so to speak. Their struggles are sisyphian. They push the boulder up the hill, watch it roll down, push the boulder up the hill, watch it roll down and are slowly realizing that all of their struggles are getting them absolutely nowhere. At which point both of them begin to self reflect and think they may have been going about things all wrong from the start. Bakugo and Endeavor both have some awareness of how unhealthy their mindset is, or at least that it’s not getting them what they want. They are sometimes capable of questioning themselves and where they’ve gone wrong.

2. A Show Parent

Psychological projection is a defense mechanism people subconsciously employ in order to cope with difficult feelings or emotions. Psychological projection involves projecting undesirable feelings or emotions onto someone else, rather than admitting to or dealing with the unwanted feelings.

Endeavor is constantly battling with his own feelings of inferiority in weakness. However rather than process these feelings in healthy ways, Endeavor has always chosen to take his feelings out on his family. The reason why is because from the start Endeavor has viewed his family in a selfish way, they existed, and continue to exist for him and not the other way around.

The way Enji projects on his family is actually for pretty common every day reasons. Enji himself feels like he can’t achieve what he wanted out of life. He wasn’t good enough to become number one, he couldn’t hack it and therefore he’ll never be good enough. That’s why he made the decision to instead try to live vicariously through Shoto, who he sees as an extension of himself. Enji has projected all of his wants and desires entirely onto Shoto. When he was raising Shoto, it was never about having Shoto’s needs met, but rather what Enji’s wants were.

Enji feels that he himself is not good enough so he projects himself onto Shoto to accomplish what he can’t, belcause he thinks he will be able to find the fulfillment he’s seeking that way. It’s the same as a person with dreams of becoming an actor pushing their child onto the stage at young ages instead of letting them go to school with all of the other kids. It’s the same as a person who wasn’t able to achieve their dreams in sports pushing their kid to be good at sports. In that sense Enji is not Todoroki’s father, he is his coach, or his manager. He’s not responsible for taking care of a child he’s raising them for a purpose.

This is the reason why we see Enji get physically angry at Shoto. Enji has so thoroughly projected himself onto Shoto, that anything Shoto wants outside of what Enji wants, Enji perceives as resistance. Enji does not seem to get that a five year old can’t take the intensive training because he sees himself as that five year old. He thinks that Shoto must just not want it enough. That he’s not motivated enough. That he’s resisting him purposefully. It’s the same reason as Bakugo getting violent towards the unconscious Shoto near the end, when Shoto stopped fighting him seriously Bakugo in his fragility perceived it as Shoto holding back from him on purpose because he was looking down on him.

If Shoto succeeds then Enji expects to feel that success. If Shoto fails that means Enji is not only reminded of his own inferiority again, but he also is forced to relive his lost dreams. Shoto doesn’t know any of that though, he’s just Shoto, just a kid, so of course he’s going to fall short of Enji’s extremely schewed expectations which is where the negative feedback loop beings.

Because, even though Enji is using his family to try to make himself feel better that doesn’t work either. The truth is Enji can’t live vicariously through his son. Shoto’s success is not his success, and Shoto himself even wants nothing to do with him anymore. Enji has been using his family for completely selfish reasons up to this point and we reach a point in the narrative where Enji at least seems to grasp the fallout of his actions. Enji is at least aware of the fact that his family doesn’t like him, and that he’s done a bad.

Reconciliation and calm are both stages that are written into the cycle of abuse for a reason. Most abusers are not heartless monsters, but rather humans. The frightening thing is abuse is a very normal thing, that arises from normal circumstances. Almost anybody can become an abuser, because it’s an abuse of power, it’s a cycle people get trapped in. A lot of abusers realize that what they are doing is wrong, this is called th reconciliation stage of abuse. Most people do in fact feel bad about it when they hurt another person and want to make ammends.

The reason abuse repeats however is because the core behavior does not change, and the power dynamic remains in place. Abusers apologize for the wounds they caused, but don’t really address the problems of their behavior on a deeper level, and because of that they let the tensions build again and another incident always occurs.

So what we are seeing post All Might retirement is not really a change in Enji’s behavior, because the core of who he is remains the same. He has perhaps had a change in motivation, he’s realized that trying to be the number one hero is never going to get him what he wants, and the way he’s treated his family has made his family hate him. However, he never addresses the core of the issue which is that he thinks his family exists for his sake. This is not my analysis these are things Enji has literally said, not in the tournament arc but post Kamino. Endeavor still says I’m going to leave everything to Shoto. Not even asking what Shoto wants to be. He still sees Shoto as his heir who exists to carry on his legacy.

Enji is still essentially doing exactly what he did before and expecting a different result. He even says so to Shoto, if he’s a good enough hero, then Shoto will watch him, and be proud of him. These are Endeavor’s own selfish motivaions and not what the other people around him really want him to do. He’s doing this for the acknowledgement he thinks he deserves, and the attention from his family he thinks he deserves and not really for altruisitic or heroic reasons.

Enji repeats a lot of his behavior from before. He still piles attention and attention onto Shoto that Shoto does not want. He is still essentially projecting himself onto Shoto and the rest of his family, that behavior has not changed, it’s just his method. He thinks if he becomes number one dad now instead of number one hero that will get him the sense of accomplishment he craves. The problem is underneath all of his actions, Enji has yet to really grasp what he did wrong. He doesn’t grasp how selfish his actions are. He doesn’t seem to understand how messed up it is, that he seems to think his family exists for his sake. He found a wife, he had children, he had Shoto, not because he wanted to make a family happy but because he wanted to use them to further his own amibtions to become a hero.

Enji is both capable of realizing that he hurt people, and feeling genuine remorse fo his actions but also not really making any signficant changes for his behavior. The fact that both of these can be true simultaneously is what allows abuse to continue.

While he knows he did something wrong you also get a sense he doesn’t truly understand how truly heinous some of his actions were. Enji always has this narrative inside of his head that he simply made a mistake somewhere along the way, that he acted without even realizing what he was doing.

It’s not that Natsuo is angry with him and will never stop being angry with him, it’s that Enji has somehow said the wrong words by mistake. It’s not that Enji violently beat a child because he was angry that child wasn’t living up to his impossible standards, but Enji somehow just ignored Shoto’s wishes.

He always makes it sound like it was accidental, like he didn’t know what he was doing, like he somehow didn’t mean to abuse them. He wasn’t beating up a little kid he just ignored Shoto’s wishes and it somehow went wrong along the way. This complete lack of culpability that Enji has towards his own actions is also what leads him to repeat several really bad aspects of his behavior, such as hyperfocusing on Shoto to the point of ignoring Fuyumi and Natsuo, forcing Shoto to live up to his legacy and accept his help, still vicariously living through Shoto instead of letting Shoto be his own person.

Enji doesn’t address the root cause of the behavior and doesn’t change himself in any real way. The bad behavior repeats. The cycle continues. What Enji has been avoiding and what he needs to acknowledge is that there was genuine malice in the way he treated his kids. He sees his whole family as existing for his sake, to meet his own emotional needs and when they failed he always took it out on them.

For Enji it’s always Enji first and everyone else second. It’s always primarily about what Enji wants. He doesn’t seem other people, only himself, and what he wants. That’s why when Shoto literally has half of his face burned off as a result of Enji’s actions, all Enji really cares about is that it’s going to interrupt Shoto’s training.

Whenever Enji’s family existed outside of what he wanted them to be, or got in his way in any significant way he always vented his frustation on them. He resorts to hitting for the same reason that Bakugo always feels the need to bully Deku. A grown up bully. Enji needs to make others feel small to feel assured of his own bigness. Deku has to always be underneath Bakugo, otherwise Bakugo’s worthless. Enji has to put his family back in their place. If they resist or show desires of their own otuside of what Enji needs for them he turns violent to try to force them back. It all arises from an incredibly unhealthy way of viewing himself and his own emotions yes, but it’s also something that other people suffer the consequences of.

His family exists for his sake, which is why he’s at the same time both extremely controlling of them, but also just straight up ignores the ones who aren’t useful to him.

These aren’t a result of Enji going too far, these are all intentional cases of neglect. Especially if you consider the way Natsuo and the others were treated. Enji didn’t even bother to take care of them and raise them as his children because they weren’t of any use to his ambitions.

He straight up had no presence in their lives whatsoever. These are things he intentionally chose to do. For his own selfish reasons, because he thought his children existed for his own happiness and not the other way around that he was not responsible for his children.

These aren’t things that can happen on accident. Neglect is as much of an abusive behavior as what was done to Shoto. It’s a parent failing even their basic responsibilities as a parent to be present and around in their child’s life.

Even the children he neglects he still controls though. When Natsuo’s cooking wasn’t good enough, Enji forced him to stop cooking anymore.

Enji had to have intentionally does these things, but when confronted with them he always acts clueless. He even claims to Natsuo’s face it was never his intention to shut any of them out of his life, even though he literally says on panel in the past that Shoto shouldn’t pay attention to his siblings because his brothers were failures.

He’s even referred to his other children as things like Shoto is somehow different from them. So how can both of these things be true at the same time? Enji had to have chosen to done these things to intentionally neglect his family, so how can he claim he never meant to shut them out of his life? How can Enji both get genuinely hateful of his children, especially Shoto when they don’t act the way he wants them to, and yet also want to do the best for his family? How can he be completely absent in Natsuo’s life his entire life and yet claim to have wanted the best for him? How is Enji capable of feeling genuine remorse for his actions and realizing that they are wrong, and still have done what he did? It’s at this point we reach the psyhological excuses. The great many hoops that he’s jumped through and mental gymnastics Enji has performed to justify himself.

3. The Shadow of the Hero

So there seems to be two contradictory sides to Enji. There is Endeavor the hero who stops at nothing to be number one who sees nothing else but his ambition and his burning drive to be better, and then there’s Todoroki Enji the family man who just seems to be sort of awkward, emotionally absent, and not at all present in his children’s lives.

Endeavor is overconfident, short tempered, and also an extremely volatile person who will get violently angry if the wrong buttons are pushed. Enji is very quiet and almost self reflective. As if Endeavor is almost always burning, and Enji is burnt out. We see this same kind of emotional dissonance happen with Bakugo too, Bakugo is either on top of the world at which point he’s firing on all cyllinders and acts like an overenthusiastic angry idiot, or he’s very quiet, withdrawn and tends to dump on himself a lot. It’s important to remember that neither of them handle their emotions in any kind of remotely healthy way, so in Enji’s case it makes sense that when he’s not angry he just becomes kind of withdrawn and empty. A person who doesn’t know how to deal with emotions becomes very emotionally awkward when they’re asked to do anything besides, be angry, or punch a villain.

However it goes to a much more extreme extent with Endeavor. To the point where it does almost seem like there are two people. There’s the much more calmer, and reasonable Enji that he has been showing around his family lately.

Which even Natsuo says that this change is so sudden and different it’s unnatural. I call this “good behavior” Enji. It’s when he’s restraining himself and holding himself back because he has at least realized that a lot of his interactions with his family in the past were wrong. But good behavior once again doesn’t necessarily mean a change in one’s self, because as stated above there’s a stage in the cycle of abuse specifically for when the abuser starts acting better for a period of time.

There has always been two faces to Endeavor. Not only does Endeavor see himself that way, but that’s also the way the public in general reacts to him. There is Endeavor the hero, and Enji the person. Shoto even comments on this word for word, that he knows Enji is a very respectable hero especially to the public but that doesn’t cancel out a single thing he did.

This is where we get into the psychological excuses. Enji’s arc deals with heavy Jungian themes, specifically that of the shadow.

In Jungian psychology, the "shadow", "Id", or "shadow aspect/archetype" may refer to (1) an unconscious aspect of the personality which the conscious ego does not identify in itself, or (2) the entirety of the unconscious, i.e., everything of which a person is not fully conscious. In short, the shadow is the unknown side.

Because one tends to reject or remain ignorant of the least desirable aspects of one's personality, the shadow is largely negative. There are, however, positive aspects that may also remain hidden in one's shadow (especially in people with low self-esteem, anxieties, and false beliefs).

For Enji, his conscious personality is Endeavor the hero. That’s the one everyone sees and reacts to. However, his shadow his the actions he’s done to his own family, what he keeps hidden and concealed from the world. The things he refuses to acknowledge such as how selfish his actions truly were.

Enji has a narrative for himself where everything he did was just because he wanted to be the best possible hero he can be. Even though his actions are entirely selfish, he’s convinced himself that he’s doing these things for Shoto, for his family. The problem is Enji’s entire identity is so focused around being a hero that he doesn’t really have an identity, or much of a personality outside of his career as a hero which is why he’s so underdeveloped as a person. Being a hero is his life. He doesn’t see the parts of his life that don’t relate to his career as a hero.

He’s able to ignore the selfish aspect of his actions. All of the contrdictory parts of his actions because he’s in denial. He still sees himself as that hero who wanted to be number one. He thinks everything he did was in favor of that and he just messed up along the way. It doesn’t occur to him that he had geniune malice towards his children, or his family because he chooses to ignore those inconvenient points of his psychology.

Enji is, two people in a sense. It’s because he revolves everything in his life around being the best hero he absolutely can be, that he doesn’t see how his actions are downright villainous. Enji is essentially trying to have it both ways. He thinks he can become the best hero that he can be, and also the best dad at the same time.

However, his behavior is the same. He’s not trying to prove himself as a father not really, he’s just doing the same thing he always did which is put his job as a hero above everything else. Enji is just so completely in his own head, so in denial of his own actions that he just doesn’t see these things.

Enji’s actions are a shadow that have escaped from him because his way of atoning and fighting against his past actions is to just do the same thing he’s always did and try his best as a hero. Even though being a hero is literally what caused him to abuse his family, and Natsuo and Todoroki have both pointed out several times that being a good hero doesn’t really atone for what he did in any real way.

Enji’s narrative for himself is that his attempt to be number one was a good thing. That his striving to be the best hero he could be was a good thing. It just somehow got bad results for him. He doesn’t really understand how he got to point A and point B, and part of that is again society’s image of Endeavor the Hero is pretty messed up too. Everyone around him praises Endeavor for being a hero while absolutely nobody talks about what happened in his home life and therefore Endeavor faces no real consequences for it.

Everyone sees this heroic figure out of the image that Enji projects. Because that’s the light. That’s who he is on the surface. If you look on the surface of his actions only you just see a guy who doesn’t know how to give up, and was trying his best to be number one. It almost looks heroic to see his struggle. However, once again if you only view things from the surface you can’t really understand him or his actions. Which is why Endeavor only viewing himself as Endeavor the hero misses his own shadow and what he’s done to the other people around him.

The person who Endeavor thinks he is, and who Enji really is are two different people. This is because of that unacknowledged shadow. It’s because Endeavor has this huge selfish element to his actions that he’s just completely in denial of. Not because he doesn’t feel guilt for his actions, but because he does and he’s avoiding it.

Enji sees himself in the high end Nomu he struggles against, but even that is an incorrect viewing of himself. Nomus are victims, ultimately. They were people who were kidnapped and had multiple quirks loaded into them in the name of mad science. The Nomu is Todoroki, Enji is Ujiko. He’s the one who created several children trying to mix quirks together for his own purposes and then dodged responsibility for that for years. He’s not the monster, he’s Doctor Frankenstein himself.

Enji when confronted with these behaviors, with the absolute worst of his personality, and the dark sides of all of his intentions never acknowledges them. He never tries to integrate them into who he is as a person. He just tries to fight against them and defeat them.

“Unless we do conscious work on it, the shadow is almost always projected; that is it is neatly liad on someone or something else we do so we do not take responsibility for it.” Robert Jonson

You don’t destroy a shadow. You don’t make the bad things you’ve done and the bad parts of your personality go away. The only way to defeat the shadow is to integrate it and consciously acknowledge that you are like this. This shadow stuff is not something I’m applying to the text either, the text directly references it.

This is Jungian symbolism. The light of the conscious mind creates the shadow. It’s because people only pay attention to Endeavor that hero, that his shadow Enji the person becomes thicker and blacker. The longer people go without acknowledging it, the darker his shadow will become.

Which is why Dabi is in a way his shadow as well. The violent parts of his personality that Enji has failed to acknowledge or do anything about, part of Enji that still believes that the only thing that matters is strength.

Enji would never approve of Dabi’s actions, and yet Enji also created Dabi. Once again think of frankenstein and the monster. Dabi wouldn’t even exist if Enji had never abused his family. The monster argues against Doctor Frankenstein that yes he has murdered people, but he never would have existed in the first place unless the doctor had created him which manes the doctor shares respsonsibility for even the unintended consequences of his actions. A person is responsible for their shadow, intentional or not. Dabi is the shadow of Endeavor’s actions in human form.

He exists to bring into conflict what Enji has been ignoring. That he can’t be good to his family and be a good hero at the same time, because his drive to be a hero was the source of his abusive behavior in the first place and drove him to do what he did to his family.

Enji is a very selfish person who hasn’t confronted his own selfishness in any significant way. Do I care that he’s only atoning for selfish reasons. No, that’s not the problem exactly. You could argue that all atonement is selfish in nature. The fact that Bakugo and Enji are very self-driven individuals is not necessarily the problem, it’s not a bad thing to want to be selfish, or even desire to better yourself. It can lead to good things. It’s that in Enji’s case, his selfishness always comes at the expense of others. He completely shuts people out and doesn’t even see them. All he sees is what he wants to see. Above all else this viewpoint of the world is very narrow and self-serving. He only sees the surface of his own actions. He only ever sees himself as the hero and can’t acknowledge that to his family he’s the villain.

Enji only ever saw himself and his self-centered view of the world, and everybody else, including the children he was responsible for and the wife he forced a marriage on only ever got in his way, which is why he resented them. If Enji wants to atone that’s one thing, but if Enji wants to stop being such a selfish person and truly do things for the sake of his family as he’s stated he wants to in the past that means acknowledging his actions.

Enji continues to be a hero because that’s what he wants, it’s what he’s built his whole life around. He even sees his path forward to atonement as just continuing to do his job as a hero, even when he’s told by Natsuo that won’t work. Which is why the only real substantial way for Enji to change is to actually have to give something up. To acknowledge that he’s in fact a bad hero. He even stated himself, there’s something he wants even more than being a hero now. He wants Toya to be there.

Which is why Dabi is such an important character because he not only forces Enji to realize the worst of his actions but also to choose, between what is best for himself and his career as a hero which is the only thing he’s ever really cared about and what is best for his family. It’s only in the confrontation with his shadow that we can see what Enji is really made of.

#todoroki enji #endeavor #meta #mha meta #my hero academia meta #bakugo katsuki #todoroki touya #foiling #dabi

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