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tkaulitzlvr · 8 months

Note

I request more Tom angst (sorry if your getting tired of them ^^) Tom finds out that the girl he really likes has a crush on Bill. Maybe no happy ending?

UNREQUITED - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: tom finally builds up the courage to tell you how he feels after years of being silently in love with you, only to find out your heart is waiting for somebody else.

content: angst

a/n: i will neverrrr get tired of angst omg, i never normally write bad endings they make me too sad, and i never write from tom’s point of view so i hope this is okay since it’s like my first time doing it, hope you enjoy!!

she was perfect. every single thing about her, from her deep blue eyes, big and inviting, to her long brunette hair, sweeping downwards to her lower back, somehow always managing to make it look flawless. her lips, plump and pink, always coated with the same lipgloss, my mind wanting to do nothing more than kiss them, feel them against mine. her body, crafted by god himself, complimenting her with the most perfect curves, every single part of her almost too faultless to be real. her beauty was mesmerising, literally leaving me breathless, ever since i first saw her. even when she swore she looked a mess - to me, she was the most beautiful girl i had ever laid eyes on.

it wasn’t just her physical appearance that i had fallen in love with. her personality enticed me more and more each day. she was kind, with one of the best sense of humours that i had ever witnessed, the two of us often sitting for hours together, laughing at things that other people might find dumb, but any words that left her mouth were like music to me, the most carefully crafted melody to ever grace my ears. her smile, able to make me feel completely content, no matter how shitty i had felt before, because she could make me forget it all, making it something of the past, like my sadness was never there in the first place. she was selfless, willing to do whatever it took for the people she loved. and she did love me, just not in the same way that i loved her.

at first, i tried to get over her, not even daring to confess the way i felt, completely afraid of ruining what we already had, because being friends with her, even if it meant that i tortured myself doing so, was a million times better than throwing away what we had for the sake of my own feelings, which i knew could never be reciprocated, not even wasting my breath by asking her. she was out of my league, deserving of somebody way better than me, someone who could give her the attention she was worthy of.

it was different before i became famous. i could spend as much time with her as i wanted. but now, i was constantly touring, and i would go weeks without seeing her, understanding that a relationship just wouldn’t be right. so i kept my feelings to myself, hoping that they would fade if i slept with other girls, taking my mind off of her. but they didn’t. they only worsened my feelings as i would close my eyes, imagining that the girl i was with was her, knowing that it would be the closest i could ever get to being her’s. and it killed me, knowing that i loved her, and i could never bring her to love me back. so many girls fell at my feet, unbeknownst to the fact that i had my heart in somebody else’s hands - they were just too oblivious to realise it. i was convinced that i would feel this way forever, despite me being only thirteen when we first met, i knew that i wouldn’t be able to love somebody the way that i loved her.

and i was right. now, six years later, my heart still throbs at the sight of her, wishing that i could call her mine. though our friendship is stronger than ever, it isn’t enough for me anymore. we have grown up, young adults now. i have grown much taller, losing my light brown dreadlocks, replacing them with jet black braids. and she has grown, but in different ways. she has matured, turning into a smart and beautiful woman. yet the way i felt towards her hasn’t changed - not in the slightest. for the first time ever, confessing my feelings is crossing my mind, my heart running ahead of my conscience and telling me that i should.

“i think she likes you.” bill shrugs, his body spread across the couch in the living room of our hotel room. we were on tour, having one more show to perform the next day in italy before we would return back home - this being the first time i would see her in over a month.

“really?” i ask, shocked at his answer and how casually he says it, as if it is the most obvious thing in the world.

“mhm.” he begins, shoving another candy in his mouth, chewing and swallowing it before continuing. “i mean, she’s the closest with you out of the four of us. you guys are inseparable, you have been since we were what, fourteen?”

“yeah but, she’s never given me a reason to believe she likes me more than a friend. after all these years, absolutely nothing. it’s driving me insane!” i sigh, grabbing the pillow next to me and digging my face into it, annoyed at how calmly bill is speaking about the whole thing.

“then tell her! you can’t expect her to be psychic, i didn’t even know you had liked her for this long until you told me. you don’t really make it obvious.” he laughs, shaking his head as i blush slightly. “i can’t believe my brother is in love!”

“fuck off, this is serious!” i groan, throwing the pillow at him as he laughs even harder. “what if she doesn’t like me back, and i ruin our friendship? i’ll never be able to forgive myself.”

“tom literally every girl on the planet likes you. i don’t think she’s any different, especially ‘cause she actually knows you, the real you, not just the version the tabloids see.” he says, becoming a little more serious now. “you need to stop being such a pussy and tell her, before it’s too late.”

“you’re right.” i nod, the decision finally being made, my mind willing to risk what we already have, unable to hide it anymore.

“i always am.” bill shrugs, smirking when i roll my eyes at him.

“so then loverboy, how was your tour? how many girls did you fuck this time, hm? can i count it on both hands or does that not even cover like, half of it?” she laughs, her body sprawled out on her bed as i sit in her desk chair, spinning around on it slowly, a cheesy grin appearing on my face.

“i’m not that bad!” i defend, shaking my head. “i do other things beside hook up with girls you know.”

“mhm, sure you do, i’m sure hot famous rockstars have way more hobbies.” she smiles, another laugh erupting from her mouth.

my eyes study her features, getting lost in them immediately. her hair is sprawled around her on the bed, still soft and perfectly styled, the ends curled slightly. her skin is smooth, a single mole on her upper cheek, another small one above her lip. her eyes are half open, showing a part of the beautiful ocean blue within them that i had fallen in love with. her lips are curved upwards into a smile, two dimples forming on her cheeks, this one of the first things i ever noticed about her.

“tom? tommm?”

i am snapped from my trance as she waves her hand in my face, laughing at the way i blink rapidly, my cheeks flushing red as i realise that she has caught me staring at her.

“you good? i thought i’d lost you there for a second.” she jokes, now laid on her front, her legs bent upwards as her thighs are in the air, head resting in her hands which are now propped up on the bed.

she awaits my response and, my heart moving ahead of my mind, i blurt something out before i can take it back. “can i talk to you?”

my question comes out more uncertain than i had anticipated, the room falling silent as her eyebrows furrow in confusion.

“why did you get so serious all of a sudden? did someone die or something? did you get some girl pregnant? i told you to use protection.” she laughs, her smile slowly fading as she sees that i am not laughing with her. “tom, what’s up, you’re scaring me.”

she sits up on the edge of her bed, crossing her legs and scanning my expression.

“no! no nothing like that.” i force a smile, easing her nerves. yet i am unable to make eye contact with her, looking towards the ground as i fiddle with the material of my t-shirt.

“then what’s up with you?” she asks, becoming increasingly concerned.

the words are stuck in my throat, holding me back as my mouth becomes dry, unable to spit out the three simple words. my mouth hangs open, no noise escaping from it. she stands up, walking closer to me and putting a hand on my shoulder in an attempt to comfort me, but it only worsens my nerves.

“seriously, is everything okay? i don’t wanna go all soppy on you, you know i hate that shit, but you can talk to me, you know that.” she says, stepping backwards a little and folding her arms.

“i like you.” i finally blurt out, looking upwards as her eyes widen, shock taking over her entire expression.

“what?” is all that she can muster, her eyes frantically scanning mine for any hint that this is another prank of mine.

“i’m in love with you. i have been since we were thirteen.” i confess, mumbling the last part and looking back downwards, unable to look at her face any longer, my stomach sinking as she stays silent.

the silence is louder than ever, tension so thick that it is almost visible, none of us daring to say anything as my mind is working overtime, wondering what the fuck i was thinking, my gut always telling me that she had never felt the same way. part of me wants to blame bill for convincing me to tell her, but the other part, the more irrational side, tells me that that would be stupid, none of this bill’s fault no matter how hard i search for someone else to blame.

“tom i-” she begins as i look upwards, her eyes glossy with tears, a couple beginning to roll down her cheeks. “fuck, i didn’t want to tell you like this.”

“tell me what?” i ask, panicking even more than i had been before, somehow fearing that her rejecting me isn’t even going to be the worst part.

“before i say this, i just- shit. i just wanna say that im so sorry, and i never ever wanted to hurt you. you’re my best friend and i-”

“what are you talking about?” i mutter, my own eyes welling up slowly.

“i like somebody else.”

those four words crash down on me, hitting me with more force than a bus would, the pain far worse, impact far heavier as my breath gets stuck in my throat, feeling as if my heart has been ripped out of my chest. i can no longer stop the tears as they cascade down my face, with her now sobbing as she realises how much she has hurt me, wether she meant to or not.

“who?” i manage to say, looking into her eyes. the answer would only hurt me more, but i wanted to know the truth, maybe it would help me get over her, or maybe that was the denial within me talking.

i wish i had never asked.

“tom you don’t need to know that, i’ve caused you enough upset-”

“just tell me.” i interrupt, feeling numb to the pain suddenly, wanting to get the answer out of the way. my face is emotionless, the only giveaway of my heartache being the tears which silently fall from my bloodshot eyes.

she pauses, pursing her lips together as the tears continue to fall, breaking eye contact for the first time, looking downwards, a look of guilt washing over her face, not even needing to look into her eyes to see it. the way she refuses to look at me gives me the silent giveaway that i should have just stayed curious.

“bill.”

my lips part, mouth dropping open as i pray that i had misheard her, that my ears had deceived me, and that i didn’t just hear her confess that she likes my brother, not me.

“tom please i’m so so sorry. i don’t wanna lose what we already have-” she begins, but i shake my head, staying silent and quickly exiting the room, running down the stairs as she calls after me. i ignore her pleas, opening her front door and slamming it shut, rushing to my car and hitting the wheel harshly, resting my head against it and beginning to sob, feeling like a complete idiot for confessing, knowing that i was way too delusional to ever think i had a chance.

now, i can take my anger out on bill, feeling such an inexplicable rage towards him, blaming him for this entire thing, the way he humiliated me, made me think i have a chance. in that moment, it wouldn’t have surprised me if he already knew she wanted him, not me, using it as a way to spite me even more. my eyes are blurry, tears blocking part of my vision as i turn my keys into the ignition, taking one last look at her house and driving away.

“how did it go? did she feel the same way?” bill says once i enter our house, quickly rushing over to me, stopping in his tracks once he sees my face, red and filled with rage, my eyes bloodshot, hands balled into fists.

“fuck off. you knew that she liked you, didn’t you, hm? you wanted to see me get fucking humiliated, you selfish piece of shit!” i shout, repeatedly pushing him, using more strength each time my hands collide with his chest, his back hitting the wall with a thud.

“can you calm down! what are you even saying?” bill shouts over me, grabbing both of my arms and holding me back as i desperately scramble to hit him harder, wanting to show him the pain he has caused me, knowing that no matter how violent i get, his wounds won’t even scratch the surface of my broken heart.

“she fucking likes you, now just fuck off and leave me alone.” i mutter, my chest heaving up and down as i back away, storming towards my bedroom and ignoring his confused shouts behind me, slamming the door with a thud. i collapse onto my bed, unable to hold back the sobs as i realise that i have lost her, no one left to blame as i have taken all my frustration out on bill, completely despising him, knowing that i will envy him for the rest of my life, willing to give anything to be in his position. he could live a million lifetimes and still never be deserving of someone like her.

she loves me, but she will always love him more.

requests are open! keep sending them in!!

#tom kaulitz #tom kaulitz x reader #kaulitz twins #tokiohotel #tom kaulitz angst #bill kaulitz #tomkaulitz #kaulitz #tom kaulitz fluff #tom kaulitz smut #bill kaulitz x reader

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awaytobeunshaken · 5 months

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Orym is high enough in the tree to make Ashton a little dizzy as he steps onto the platform. They’re sure Orym has heard them, or maybe he hasn’t. He’s been pretty out of it. Which is kind of why Ashton has bothered to come up here in the first place.

“You okay?” Ashton’s voice seems to echo strangely and they’re not sure if it’s the height or the surrounding terrain or just the fey realm itself. “You’ve been pretty quiet since… everything.” Orym’s response is not so much a sigh as a shaky breath; maybe he doesn’t want them around any more than anyone else does. “Sorry. I can leave if—”

“Don’t” Orym’s voice is barely above a whisper.

Ashton takes a deep breath and moves closer, leaning against the rail Orym is perched on (gods, they wish he wouldn’t do that), but keeping a respectable distance. “I just want to tell you…”

“You don’t need to apologize to me.” He lets the statement hang between them, and Ashton’s not quite sure how to respond. “I know you’ve been making the rounds,” Orym continues. “And I get what you were trying to do, you thought if you went through with that then you’d be able to keep everyone safe. So yeah, I fucking get it.”

Yeah. Orym would.

“I know you do. But I want to apologize anyway; I—”

“I said I don’t want it. Not like this, not when you don’t even know what you’re apologizing for.”

“What.” He’d lied to them, he’d nearly gotten them killed, he’d tried to become stronger and only made himself less able to protect them: not quite a liability but certainly not as useful as he had been.

Orym’s knuckles go white against the railing and his breathing turns heavy. “We watched you die, Ash. I had to watch you die in front of me and there was nothing I could do about it and nothing we could have done to bring you back. I hoped I would never have to go through that again. Why, Ash? Why don’t you think you’re enough?”

There’s no real weight behind it, but Ashton’s nerves still flare at the unexpected pressure of a fist in their thigh. “I think maybe for a lot of the same reasons you do. We’ve lost people we love and we don’t want it to happen again. You might be a little luckier though; you knew yours loved you back.”

“Can I hug you? I think you could use it.”

They barely have time to nod before arms encircle Ashton’s waist and they wince for a moment before settling into it.

“You do have people who love you, Ash. I promise. And I think maybe the best apology you can make is to try to let yourself believe that.”

#critical role #ashton greymoore #orym of the air ashari #ashrym #cr3 #c3e78 #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #cr fic #my fic

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stinkkyy · 2 years

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the creator falls (out of a tree) for diluc

Now why the hell was Diluc back here.

There wasn’t a real reason other than he had taken a walk that had ended up with him at this big ass tree again.

As he stands at the base of the statue to Barbatos, he feels a tug at his heart. It had been happening a lot more lately, this pulling. The tug at his heart as if somebody was at the other end of the string, gently urging him to go somewhere or do something.

So here he was at a statue for a God he admired and a tree dedicated to a woman who now protects all of Mondstadt silently.

He crosses his arms and glares up at the tree. “Well? I’m here now, what do you want from me?”

Diluc stands there for just a moment longer, secretly expecting a response but of course nothing comes from it.

He sighs, looking away from the tree feeling rather embarrassed for having such a wish.

With nothing left to do but try and enjoy his day out, he goes to sit at the base of the tree. He slumps against it, one leg folded up and the other splayed out before him. Diluc rests his head along the tree as he watches the clouds in the sky.

He felt like a fool.

For the past month or so he had been.. Strangely content. Happier than usual. That in itself would normally be cause for celebration but with such happiness came an unease.

Jean chalked it up to allergies, his immune system never favored the summer weather.

Lisa suggested that perhaps he was in love. That was the last time he’d ever come to her for advice.

Kaeya had a certain look in his eye. It told him that his past brother likely knew the ailed him but chose not to answer truthfully, only giving a rather cryptic response.

Venti was the only one who had given something halfway decent but even then it was bullshit upon more bullshit.

“Follow whatever is pulling your heart along and go talk to it! That will solve everything and who knows, maybe love will consume you and everything will be answered!”

Diluc snorts haughtily at himself as he remembers the bards words. Sure he was a god but he didn’t have to sound so annoying about it, former crush or no.

Before he could have anymore time to think about it there was a voice calling out to him from above.

“Hey! Hey hey, you there, D-! D..... Theee stranger in red!”

“… Excuse me?”

“Yeah you! Hey uh, I’m in a bit of pickle right now so you think you can help?”

Diluc looked up to where the voice was located and felt his heart freeze. The tugging had become stronger than it ever had before, so sharp and pointed like it was going to rip apart any second now.

The owner of the voice was covered by the leaves and branches of the tree but if he focused he could make out the outline of their body but even that was hard.

Whoever they were just might be the answer he had been searching for.

More leaves and twigs fell down onto his lap and he grunts in annoyance when he flicks them away. “How can I help you, stranger.”

A pause. “How confident are you in catching a person?”

“Depends on how high up said person is and considering we’re practicing yelling at one another, I’d say you’re rather high up.”

Another pause followed by quiet, nervous laughter. Another sigh. “Yeah.. Right on the mon- On the mora. Yeah.”

Diluc resigns himself to his fate and slips off his jacket, letting it fall into the floor as he tries to coordinate himself to wherever they must be hanging out at.

“Let’s get this over with then.”

“Wh- You’ll help me? Seriously??”

He glares up at them, a bit offended. “You assumed I wouldn’t?”

“W-Well…”

“Get down already before I leave you stuck up there.”

“Okay okay! Gimme a second, okay? This is a really high fall!!”

“You’ll be fine.”

Diluc huffs as he listens to the rustling of the branches, gauging how soon this stranger would jump down from the tree. Really, he had better things to be doing other than attempting to catch somebody from a tree like-

“Huh..” The more he tries to think of what he could be doing with his time he realizes he can’t come up with anything. For some reason, all he wants to do is stick by this stranger and see this through to the end.

He places a hand at his heart, jaw clenching slightly as he thinks it over. And then there was that whole thing where the longing at his heart was pulling him closer to whoever this person was.

Were the two connected somehow?

He doesn’t have time to think about it for much longer until he hears the strangers voice yell out something that has him on his guard.

“Wait-!”

“Aaand three!! AH-“

Diluc widens his stance and holds his arms out wide for them, grunting when they land in his arms at last, though he does falter back just a bit. That is the last time he will ever catch somebody from a tree ever again.

He growls lowly in his annoyance, a glare locked and loaded on his face as he looks to the person but whatever scolding he had ready to dish out die in the back of his throat when he lays eyes on them.

They’re smiling. It’s a big toothy grin with their eyes filled with stars, their entire being glowing the world up in a way he could never properly put into words.

“You’re Diluc,” the say with a giddy laugh. “The Diluc Ragnivinder!”

And yet he’s still just staring at them like a fish out of water

He comes to his senses and clears his throat, easing them into their feet as he fights a wicked flush off of his cheeks.

“It’s Ragnvindr, actually.” He finally says, not really caring for their incorrect pronunciation, eyes never leaving their form.

The tugging at his heart was pulled taut and it was headed straight towards them. This had to be why he had decided to come here. For them. Diluc swears he can recognize their face from somewhere but he can’t place it.

All he knows is that he feels so unbelievably loved and cherished.

“Got a staring problem, Master Diluc? C’mon, lemme thank you for saving my tail somehow!”

Diluc snaps out of his daydream as a ghost of a smile breaks onto his lips, nodding. “You wear clothes not of his nation, dirty ones at that. I will have lunch prepared for us at my home..”

“Wh- Man.. You’re a lot more stern than I had expected…” They grumble but dutifully follow by his side.

His heart pounds wildly in his chest as the pieces begin to connect themselves and while Diluc was not the most devoted follower to the gods anymore, you would have to be a fool to not eventually realize that you are standing besides The Creator.

A god who had been absent for thousands of years and only now resurfaced.

A god that will cause a stir in the world if left unchecked.

A god that has his heart pounding, face flushed, and palms sweaty.

“The Dawn Winery?” They squeak out. “Really?? Aaah man Diluc, you’re amazing! I can’t wait!”

Yes, to keep them to himself for a little while longer wouldn't hurt. He’s doing this to protect them, nothing else.

#sagau #genshin impact #genshin impact writing #character pov #gn readere #diluc imagines #diluc/reader #diluc x reader #mun koko #i had posted this on my ao3 but it was meant to be on here

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lynetianya · 8 months

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A Bond Beyond Stardom [ Winter & Reader ]

Winter and Y/N are siblings that once shared a fractured bond marred by tragedy and resentment.

GENRE : Wholesome

TYPE : One Shot

In a small, dimly lit apartment, lived Winter, whose real name was Minjeong, and her older brother, Y/N. Their lives were far from the glamorous world Winter would one day enter. Their parents had tragically passed away, leaving them to fend for themselves. Y/N, still in school at the time, had to abandon his education to find work and provide for both of them. With each passing day, they clung to each other as the only remnants of their family.

However, their relationship was marred by bitterness. Winter blamed Y/N for everything, their parents' deaths, their impoverished circumstances, and the struggles they faced. She harbored a deep-seated resentment towards him, even though he was innocent of any wrongdoing. Y/N, in turn, was burdened by the guilt of being unable to shield his younger sister from life's cruelties. Despite the hostility, he loved Winter unconditionally and tirelessly worked to support her.

As Winter's birthday approached, she assumed that Y/N would forget, just as everyone else seemed to. It would be the first time she'd celebrate without her parents. Her friends were busy with their own lives, and she felt utterly alone. Y/N was at work, as usual, when she decided to retreat to her room and attempt to sleep away her misery.

But then, as the hours ticked away, Y/N arrived home, bearing a massive birthday cake. He smiled warmly and wished her a happy birthday. Winter's eyes welled up with tears as she couldn't believe her eyes.

"i loves you a lot minjeong" Y/N said tenderly, wrapping his arms around his sister. Winter, unable to contain her emotions any longer, broke down and returned the hug, sobbing softly.

"May God bless you with everlasting peace, good health, and endless love." Y/N whispered affectionately, kissing Winter's forehead. "One day, I promise, I'll give you everything you've ever wanted, okay?"

Winter, realizing the sacrifices Y/N had made for her, felt a wave of guilt wash over her. Y/N bore the weight of their world on his shoulders, and she saw the toll it had taken on him, evident in his weary face and disheveled appearance. He had come straight from work to celebrate her birthday.

From that day forward, Winter resolved not to be a burden to Y/N. She threw herself into her studies, determined to excel and create a brighter future for both of them. She dreamed of a life where Y/N wouldn't have to toil endlessly, where they could share their joys and burdens equally.

Years passed, and Winter's hard work paid off. She was recruited by SM Entertainment as a K-pop trainee, a path that would lead her to stardom. Her dedication, talent, and charisma earned her a place in a popular idol group. As Winter's star ascended, their lives began to change for the better.

Their bond, once strained by resentment and hardship, grew stronger. Winter became increasingly attached to Y/N, cherishing their moments together. Every time they reunited, she would envelop him in a tight embrace, seeking comfort and reassurance. Winter had become more affectionate.

As Winter's fame soared, she never forgot the promise Y/N had made on her birthday. She also determined to provide her brother with the life he deserved, one where he could pursue his passion without the burden of constant work.

With Winter's success, their lives transformed. They moved into a comfortable apartment in the heart of Seoul, a far cry from their humble beginnings. Y/N finally had the opportunity to pursue his passion for sculpture, dedicating himself to creating magnificent works of art.

Winter kept her promise, providing Y/N with the support he needed to thrive as an artist. She invested in his career, arranging exhibitions and introducing his sculptures to influential art collectors. Y/N's talent blossomed, and his sculptures gained recognition in the art world.

As for Winter, her popularity continued to grow. She became known not only for her beauty but also for her humility and generosity. Despite her hectic schedule, she always found time for her brother, attending his art exhibitions and proudly showcasing his sculptures in her lavish home.

With their hardships firmly behind them, Winter and Y/N embraced their new life. Winter's clinginess towards her brother only grew, but Y/N welcomed it with open arms. They relished the moments they spent together, whether it was enjoying a simple home-cooked meal or attending a glamorous event.

One evening, as they sat on the balcony of their luxurious apartment, gazing at the city below, Winter turned to Y/N, her eyes filled with warmth and affection.

"Brother, do you remember how we used to be?" Winter asked, her voice tinged with nostalgia.

Y/N smiled, his eyes twinkling with love. "I do, Minjeong. But I wouldn't change a thing. Our past made us who we are today, and I'm grateful for every moment we've shared."

Winter rested her head on Y/N's shoulder, a sense of contentment washing over her. "I love you, brother."

"I love you too, Minjeong" Y/N replied, wrapping his arm around his sister. "And I'm proud of everything you've achieved."

In that moment, as they looked out over the city that had witnessed their struggles and triumphs, Winter and Y/N knew that their bond was unbreakable. Through the storms of their past, they had emerged stronger, their love shining brighter than any star in the sky. Theirs was a story of redemption and a testament to the power of family, reminding them both that no matter how dark the night, the dawn would always break, bringing with it a new day filled with hope and love.

END

My Masterlist

#winter fanfic #winter imagines #winter & reader #winter oneshot #oneshot #aespa fanfic #aespa oneshot #kpop oneshots #kpop imagines #wholesome #kpop wholesome

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maureensmistress · 4 months

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Falling - Pattie Boyd x Reader

After you and Pattie come close to spending the night together, your fears and uncertainties take over and nearly tear the two of you apart. Sequel to Under the Bleachers.

Angst, internalized homophobia, insecurity, miscommunication, angst with a happy ending, catching feelings, high school au

Words: 3.1k

Masterlist

Two weeks had gone by since you and Pattie last spoke. You hated it. Hated missing her, hated seeing her, hated the fact that she was either furious and glad to be rid of you or utterly heartbroken and confused. But when she tried to catch your eye you always looked away, too terrified to find out which.

Those round blue eyes that always saw straight through you – were they looking through you now? Did they know you now? And, if she finally did understand you, what did her soft blue eyes look like when they had gone hard and cold with hate?

You couldn’t stand to find out. You weren’t brave enough. You’d figured that out the morning after you’d– after what happened two weeks ago.

That morning you woke up with your head pounding, glad you and Pattie threw out the bottle when you did or you’d probably be even sicker, and rubbed your face into the pillow. The night before came back in flashes of pale moonlight and the ghost of hot kisses on your lips and neck. Your face burned and you wished you could burrow into your bed and disappear.

You could picture Pattie’s sweet face curling in disgust when she remembered what happened last night, what she’d almost let herself do, and the pain of that thought rolled over you like a dark wave. But I stopped it in time, you reminded yourself. Please, please, let it be enough that you stopped it in time. Let Pattie forgive you for what could have been.

A little voice from the back of your mind, the part of yourself you kept locked up, almost asked why it had felt for a moment like Pattie wanted you, too. But you silenced that thought, recognizing it for the sick self-delusion that it was. Flashes of what could happen if she ever realized how you felt, what she could say, what you had promised yourself that she would say, were as vivid and real and powerful as any sweet moment of soft skin or gentle touch.

It might be okay, you thought desperately. Maybe Pattie would write it all off as a stupid mistake. You heard her voice in the back of your mind, low and throaty: People do silly things when they’re drinking. I don’t think they count.

But it would have counted to you. It would have meant everything to you.

Put that away, you told yourself firmly, just as you had for the last four years. You just had to put thoughts like that away, remind yourself that you were her friend.

Only these days that little place in the back of your mind where you locked these kinds of thoughts was getting harder to ignore. Like that hidden part of you, that wild, stupid, desperate part of you was pounding on the ceiling and demanding to be heard. And every time you went near Pattie, every time you let yourself swim in those soft blue eyes, that part of you got louder and stronger and closer to breaking out.

Last night, that heat you’d felt pooling in your stomach, it was so wild and powerful and free. And you could never let yourself be free like that, could never let that desperate, stupid girl escape. Please, you thought, not sure if you were praying to one god in particular or just begging the universe at large.

You just knew, more firmly than you knew anything, that if you let that girl escape it would ruin everything. And you knew, too, that it was inevitable. That knowledge wrapped itself around your heart and squeezed until you thought it might break.

Maybe, after four years of fighting yourself, you had to accept that you couldn’t be around Pattie anymore. It made your stomach clench and your heart feel like stone. No, no, that’s not true, you told yourself firmly, perhaps a little desperately. But fear had wrapped another tendril around your heart.

Lying in bed with your head pounding, you felt yourself clinging to a ledge, afraid of the darkness below. I can’t lose her, you repeated to yourself, like it was some kind of spell that could ward off the inevitable. You’d lost your parents when they found out what you were – they 'd never look at you the same way, and you knew you deserved it.

And you knew, too, that someone as sweet and kind and perfect as Pattie would feel just the same way. That the closer you got to her the closer you got to the moment when it would dawn on her just how sick and horrible you were. Even if she forgave you for last night, there was no denying now that the moment was drawing closer. The moment when she would throw you away. When you would slip from the ledge and vanish.

I can’t take it, you realized, your stomach twisting. When she finally realizes how much she hates me, I won’t be able to take it. The weight of that realization, and everything it implied, settled in your stomach like a stone. You’d been playing a dangerous game for the past four years. But you couldn’t play it anymore.

It had been two weeks, now, since you’d figured that out. The next morning you’d averted your gaze from her when she tried to catch your eye, pointedly ignored her when she tried to say good morning. It wasn’t easy to build up such distance with someone who was near you pretty much all the time, but Pattie seemed to understand quickly. Seemed to know deep down what you knew, too -- that this was for the best.

But nothing could have prepared you for how much you missed her, the endless silence and the ache in the place where she should have been. After two weeks, you figured Pattie had just about given up on you. Certainly she didn’t try to catch your eye anymore, or pass you notes you were too afraid to read.

But those notes accumulated in the back of your drawer, because you couldn’t stand to throw them out, either. Not when Pattie wrote them. Not when they were as close to her as you would ever be again. And how could you long so deeply for something that frightened you so much?

***

At first, Pattie pretended not to know why you were avoiding her. She pretended as hard as she could, so much that she almost believed it. The idea, that first morning, was to keep going like nothing had happened. Pretend last night was just a strange dream and hope that you would do the same. But, of course, you hadn’t.

Then, when she couldn’t pretend any longer, the panic set in. What had she been thinking, kissing you like that? Doing– doing the other things that she’d done? You must be furious. Or disgusted. Or terrified. Or all three at once. Pattie had been each of them in turn, but more than any of it, more than anything at all, she just missed you so much that it ached.

When you wouldn’t speak to her she wrote pages and pages of letters. Apologizing, accusing, begging. And then she ripped them all up and tried again. The way words flowed easily for her, it didn’t help now. Because putting things in words only made them more real, and making things real was exactly the problem.

The practice kisses, the long sleepless nights whispering every dream and almost every secret to one another, the way you gazed at her when she pretended to be asleep and the way she liked it so, so much. The wild, uncontrollable thing that was growing up between the two of you, the thing you had both silently agreed to pretend you couldn’t see so that it couldn’t become real. It was real now. She’d made it real when she pressed you into the grass – and why could she still feel the length of your body under her own, and why did it still feel so good? – and clearly you would never forgive her.

***

You were in the back of the library when Pattie caught you. It was the same place you’d had your first kiss, and although ostensibly you were looking for a quiet place to nurse your sadness and your loneliness you knew deep down you just liked to feel a little closer to her. To imagine that you were waiting for Pattie to meet you so you could “practice” like you used to. Only it hadn’t been just practice to you like it had been to her, unless it wasn’t to her either, which would be even worse.

You were so lost in thought, busy feeling sorry for yourself, that you jumped when Pattie whispered your name. You didn’t have to turn around to know it was her – you knew her voice like it belonged to yourself. Without looking up, afraid still of meeting her eyes, you made to brush past her. This had worked in the past when Pattie tried to talk to you, but this time she moved to block you.

“Don’t,” she said, sounding urgent. “Don’t go until I’ve had a chance to talk to you.”

You half-glanced up and saw defiance in the set of her jaw. You knew without looking any further that her blue eyes would be narrowed and her brows drawn, the same face she made when she was working on a difficult homework problem or searching for a memory she couldn’t quite grasp. It sent a pang through you, the way her every expression was engraved in your heart. The way you would always feel her absence in such intense detail.

“You don’t have to say anything,” Pattie said, sounding like she’d practiced this before. “But just let me talk. Just let me talk to you, and then I promise I’ll leave you alone.”

She stood before you, still blocking your path, but you had a feeling if you tried to get around her now she would let you go. It was a long moment, and you knew the right thing would have been to brush past her and put this moment into the locked room in the back of your mind that you tried so hard not to touch anymore, no matter how loudly that hidden part of you was demanding to be let out.

But, beneath that practiced calm, there had been pain in Pattie’s voice. And you couldn’t stand it when she was in pain.

She seemed to take your silence for assent, because she continued. “I don’t know if you read any of my letters. I’m guessing you didn’t.”

You didn’t have to wonder how she knew that. Pattie always knew what you were going to do before you did.

“Well, don’t bother. I didn’t know what I wanted to say to you back then. I was… I was upset.”

Your chest tightened, and you risked a glance at Pattie’s crossed arms. They weren’t crossed in anger, but pulled tightly together like she was hugging herself, holding herself in one piece.

“But I’ve thought it over and I’ve tried to see it from your perspective, and I know what I want to say to you.” Pattie took a deep breath, and then said, “I’m sorry.”

Your gaze jerked to her face involuntarily, and for the first time in two weeks you looked into Pattie’s bright blue eyes. You’d wondered before what they would look like full of hate, how brutally painful it would be to see those soft blue eyes turn hard. But they weren’t. They weren’t even angry. Pattie just looked hurt.

“It’s not your fault,” you blurted out before you could think it through. The idea of Pattie blaming herself for what had happened between the two of you hadn’t even crossed your mind, and suddenly it seemed like the worst possibility of all. That the pain you’d been carrying for four years, the self hatred and the loneliness and the desperation, would be hers to carry now, too. Surely she didn’t deserve that. Surely that couldn’t be right.

“Of course it’s my fault,” Pattie said, and her voice wasn’t so carefully even, there was a touch of frustration now, too.

“I– I wanted to do it, too,” you said shakily, unable to admit that, in fact, you’d wanted to do those things with her for years. “You can’t take all the responsibility for it. And– and anyways,” you were babbling a little, trying to make the hurt, regretful look in her eyes go away, to ward away all the pain you knew she must be feeling, “we probably just confused ourselves with all the, uh, the practicing. I’m sure neither of us meant it.”

But she didn’t seem comforted, not in the slightest. Instead she shook her head slightly and said, “That’s not what I’m saying. I’m not sorry we kissed. I'm sorry–” she swallowed slightly, and then pressed on. “I’m sorry that I never told you how I feel about you.”

What?

You stare, confused. You try to find words to explain the shock, the panic, the fluttering hope, but all you can do is shake your head slowly. “You’re my friend,” you say, breath caught in your throat, repeating the mantra that you always turn to when your daydreams about Pattie get too dangerous. “We’re just friends.”

“Not for me. Not for a long time.”

“But–”

Pattie continued, talking over you like she might not get the words out otherwise. “And I should have said something a long time ago. I should have admitted it to myself a long time ago. I strung you along and let us get all tangled up into something neither of us understands, and now it’s real and we can’t deny it anymore, and that might mean you never talk to me again and so I’m sorry. I’m sorry if we can never be friends again. I’m sorry if we can’t be anything at all.”

It was so sincerely felt, so real and blunt and, just underneath the surface, so alive with pain and regret. Like Pattie really thought she could have confessed her feelings to you a month ago, a year ago, whenever, and you would have wrapped her in your arms and told her you loved her, too. Like you hadn’t been far too much of a coward to ever do that. Like you weren’t such a coward still.

It was on the tip of your tongue to tell her it was alright, you loved her, you wanted her. You were desperate to say it, say anything that would keep this moment from ending and keep her from going away. But, god, you had been so afraid for so long. And all that fear seemed to wrap itself around you like a snake, to squeeze the air out of your lungs, to make it impossible to utter any words at all.

After a long moment of being unable to speak, of staring into her wide blue eyes, so frightened and filled with anticipation, and feeling whatever beautiful thing had existed between you slipping away forever, Pattie’s eyes fell from yours and she shifted slightly to the side, clearly making room to let you leave. The conversation was over. Your chance – your only chance – to save the most important relationship in your entire life was over.

It felt like being cut loose, like you were falling away somewhere deep inside yourself, a fall that would never end, and it washed over you like vertigo or dizziness or just a swirling terror. That slippery ledge you’d been clinging to since the morning after you and Pattie almost made love had finally crumbled and you were falling and falling into the darkness below, and for just a moment you lost your mind.

“Pattie–” it came out of your lips without your permission, but then more words came tumbling after it. “Pattie, please, don’t be mad at me. Don’t hate me. I just– I just don’t know what to do,” you pleaded.

Pattie looked taken aback, and she reached for you as if to comfort you in just the same way that she always had, but her hand jerked and paused in midair as if she’d suddenly remembered that she wasn’t allowed to do that sort of thing. And that crushed you, because how many times had you caught yourself, scolded yourself, reminded yourself that you weren’t allowed to hug her for too long or curl up beside her too close or stroke her hair out of her face with the kind of tenderness that would have felt right? How many times had you remembered that you weren’t allowed to do that sort of thing, and how deeply had it cut?

“I don’t hate you,” she said, sounding a little confused. “I’m– I’m apologizing.”

“I know. I’m sorry. I’m just – I just– I don’t know what to do to make you… make you not go away.” Humiliatingly, you felt a lump rising in your throat and you had to swallow hard to keep it in check. Crying was probably the only way you could make this situation worse.

Pattie watched you for a second, and you knew she knew you were trying not to cry, because she knew everything about you. And maybe, you thought, somewhere deep in the back of your mind, maybe she knows how much you love her, too. It should have been a terrifying thought, but somehow it felt like a spark of hope.

“I'm not going away,” she said softly. You let out the breath you’d been holding, feeling just a trace of the fear, the intensity, fading away. “All I really know is I don’t ever want to lose you.”

“You couldn't,” you said truthfully. Or maybe it wasn’t quite the truth anymore – maybe now that you were allowing this thing growing up between the two of you to become real it meant you were entering a different part of your relationship, a part that was a little bit more complicated and a little harder to understand. That might open the door to something beautiful or might mean losing each other entirely.

But, as Pattie enveloped you in her arms and you felt that familiar rush of warmth and comfort and, just as familiar, the twinge of guilt and fear, you felt something else as well. Something warm and stirring deep in your chest. Not the heat that had pooled in your stomach that night under the moonlight, but something almost like a second heartbeat. A strong, soft, steady pulse. It felt like whatever came after hope. It felt like the opposite of fear.

It felt, you realized, like joy.

#the beatles #beatles girls #beatles girls x reader #beatles fic #lesbian #wlw #pattie boyd #pattie boyd x reader

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taliskermortem · 10 months

Text

okay on to episode 9

again under the cut so as not to bore you all

MINSEONG AND HYEONGJOON DATE:

the cuddling. its back. i’m still not over it.

minseong not impressed he’s been abandoned

oh my god. he made a list. i’m in love with him.

hyeongjoon’s driving terrifies me and minseong willingly got back in the car with him behind the wheel that’s some serious bravery

ah my hyeongjoon he’s so shy and awkward

why are they the only ones doing a proper activity

also they did not wear warm enough coats for this… oh never mind they did bring better coats thank god

why is hyeongjoon like this, he’s such a mess and its adorable… at least its an excuse to hold hands i guess

HOT PACKS AS A LANGUAGE OF LOVE I GUESS

(side not again… okay i never used to understand why so many koreans hate cucumber because where im from its really not that strong of a taste but that was before i had a korean cumcumber and now i undersand completely i don’t know whats wrong with them )

COUPLE RINGS I'M DEAD MINSEONG-AH WHY ARE YOU SO CUTE THEY’RE HIDEOUS

i’ve just ealised this is minseong’s first proper date bless him (no that one with junseong did not count that was just friends hanging out)

also how does hyeongjoon make those slits in his eyebrow disappear so thoroughly

ah communication. we love it.

they’re so cute together

JEONGWOOK AND HYEONGJIN DATE:

aah jeongwook i wish you weren’t so hung up on yoonghee

glad he’s enjoying himself though and he seems more relaxed with hyeongjin than i expected

oh my god imagine if hyeongjin didn’t like dogs this would have been a disaster

i too would focus on the dog and not the date can’t really blame you for that one

no no if he’s going to serenade i’m out of here i can’t deal with that i’m sorry even if you have the best voice in the world i cant hack it

WHY A CHRISTMAS SONG WHAT IS GOING ON GET ME OUT OF HERE

okay i’m sure he has a lovely voice but i think i died of embarrassment hyeongjin you truly are stronger man than me

okay it’s nice that jeongwook is opening up and showing more of himself but this is not really feeling like a date at all and if i were hyeongjin i would feel so incredible awkward right now

ah jeongwook don’t cry noooo this poor guy, he seems to really be struggling i hope he’s okay

THE EVENING:

not the dates coming home in order of how successful they were (from least to most in my personal opinion)

minseong following hyeongjoon to his room even though they’ve spent all day together already

JUNSEONG AND SEONGHO FIRST TO LEAVE LAST TO RETURN TAKE FROM THAT WHAT YOU WILL

yoonghee and junseong’s friendship is important to me okay

seonwoo literally could not answer a question directly even if his life depended on it

oh wow he’s really just going to sit there and stare at junseong and seongho in the kitchen what the hell dude

wow this isn’t awkward at all what are you trying to achieve here other than making everyone uncomfortable

let’s be honest the real final couple from this show is hyeongjoon and food

they talked for SEVEN HOURS HAHAHA I’M FINE (also still sitting together at the table it’s the little things okay)

AH I'M WEAK – hyeongjin wanting to talk to junseong and junseong taking seongho with him with that soft arm on his shoulders yes hi ive died had to rewind like five times to catch what they were saying because i was too distracted watching them… oh my god seongho’s ‘im going with you’ look im totally fine

GREY SPORTSWEAR FAMILY

seongho abandoning them to all the dishes he created just to hang out with junseong some more

okay im glad they had the same reaction as me to taking him to his house

THE HEAD ON THE LAP/SHIN SEONGHO PLEASE

“a very personal song” it was a christmas song bro

sensible seongho – go talk to jeongwook not them

poor jeongwook i feel like he’s been totally confused this whole day and to be honest i cant blame him there was a much simpler and susinct way for hyeongjin to get his point across without sounding kind of like an asshole and hurting people’s feelings

hyeongjin, my dude, stop. he get’s it, you misunderstood. let’s just let it rest and say you had a good time but you don’t have feelings

i understand hyeongjin not wanting there to be a misunderstanding but also jeongwook is right why he’s saying it like this is weird and hurtful

right i knew this conversation was going to go down the toilet but i didn’t think it would be this bad

unnecessary drama is all im saying

VOICEMAIL AND PHONE CALL TIME:

ha seonwoo no message from seongho or yoonghee this is what happens when you act the nice guy and have no follow through

seonwoo to seongho – awkward phone call and the first thing he brings up is seongho’s date with junseong this guy is a joke he literally said the other day they should just focus on each other not on junseong but he cannot let it go

two messages for junseong i’m living for this he deserves it

his face when he heard yoonghee that was priceless oh my god he’s so sweet and yeah i just love their friendship

love the silent pause before the second message like junseong and literally everyone else is holding their breath in anticipation

JUNSEONG-AH DID YOU WAIT LONG I'M SOBBING

also i’m pretty sure junseong has his eyes closed like he can’t quite believe it

AND THE PREVIEW:

look i don’t really want to talk about this i’ve been mad about it all day and will be for the next week

but also

from the voice mails we now know:

junseong – seongho

seongho – junseong

yoonghee – junseong

seonwoo – seongho

hyeongjin – seonwoo

minseong – hyeongjin

so the only one we don’t know is jeongwook, which means he definitely doesn’t have any messages and unless he sent a message to hyeongjoon (which is definitely possible) hyeongjoon also won’t have any messages

i kind of wish minseong had told hyeongjoon beforehand that he hadn’t sent him a message just so hyeongjoon isn’t expecting it and it’s not going to ruin his evening after the date they had

ugh it’s still such a mess i’m just going to try and forget about everything that isn’t junseong and seongho being soft

#his man 2 #so to conclude #junseong and seongho - yes #minseong and hyeongjoon - yes #yoonghee i want to take you out of there and find you someone worthy of you #the rest meh

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m-jelly · 1 year

Text

Unlikely familiar - Chapter 7

Pairing: God Levi x Fem!Reader

Genre and tags: Magic/royal AU, fluff, romance, soulmates, falling in love, God Levi, wizard Hange, witch reader

Concept: You investigate the library and make a new friend. You talk to your old friend Erwin and get an update on his life along with working together. You create a staff with Levi's help and use your powers. Your powers are so strong that you discover some exciting news.

AO3 link

Part 8

You stared at the bookcase and whined. “This is massive.”

Levi nuzzled his cat head against your cheek. “You’ll find what you need.”

You pouted. “I wish you weren’t a cat. I want to kiss and cuddle.”

“You’re adorable, my love.”

You let out a long sigh. “This is going to take so long and I doubt we’ll find anything useful.”

“Have faith, my love. You’re stronger than you think. You have come this far for me.”

You looked into Levi’s cat eyes and hummed. “You’re right.” You huffed a sigh. “I can do this.”

You walked with Levi lying over your shoulders as a cat. You searched the bottom floor for any books to do with Levi’s people and the land but found nothing. Eventually, you moved upstairs where Hange was running around. You started from one end and she went from the other. You selected a few books before making your way to a little study table and began reading with the summer sun filtering through the windows as your light.

You leaned your cheek on your hand as Levi curled up and lay in the sunlight on the desk. You smiled softly at him sleeping in the sun. “Cute.”

Levi opened his eyes. “I’m not cute.”

You hummed a laugh. “You are.” You reached over and massaged his ears. “I’m sorry it’s taking so long for me to find the truth.”

He nuzzled your hand. “Do not be sorry, okay? I can’t believe you and Hange want to discover what happened and let the world know. I would be happy to just live together on the land.”

You fiddled with your hands. “Is me doing this bad?”

“What do you mean?”

You welled up. “You never asked for me to do this and I’m just going around digging up the past and looking closer. I have no right to do this. I’m just opening up your old wounds. I don’t need to do all this. Ever since I started pushing for this a curse got a hold of you and you had to run. I feel like I’m being selfish. Maybe we should just pack up and go home.”

Levi placed his paw on your hand. “I’m happy you’re doing this. You’re right, I never asked you to do this for me but I’m overjoyed. You love me so much that you want to clear my name. If it weren’t for you, I would just leave it be and have people hate me for eternity, but you want people to know the truth and that the real bad guys are out there. This could be a lot deeper than we think. People need to know the truth. For starters, those mages of light and nothing but liars.”

You leaned your cheek on your hand. “Our powers come from a God’s blessing. What God blessed them?”

“Who do you think?”

You stared at him and realised something so simple. “That woman.”

He stretched and meowed. “She gave them power just like I gave people power.”

“Is mine from you?”

He sat and placed his paws on his tail. “Indeed. Hange is a mix between my power and another God’s. Your friend Erwin you mentioned with elemental magic is gifted with another God’s power.”

You pouted a little. “If we were to stop her, would that mean all mages of light will lose their power?”

He stared at you for a while. “Possibly.”

You sat back in your chair. “I kind of feel bad for that. I’m taking something away from people who haven’t hurt a single person because their God is wicked and a liar. It’s not their fault.”

“You’re right, it’s not but there are consequences to people’s actions and unfortunately she got many people involved.” He walked up to you and nuzzled your cheek. “Don’t worry though, I won’t leave them powerless. I and other gods will give them blessings of power.”

“Just goes to show the mess she’s made. Where is she anyway?”

“I don’t know.” He walked over to the window. “If I knew I would have killed her.”

You leaned your cheek on your hand. “I’m glad you didn’t.”

He looked over at you. “Me too. I would have become a dragon if I did.” He jumped onto your lap and nuzzled your breasts. “I have full faith in you and your friends.”

You fussed Levi’s head and carried on reading your books and making notes. You learned a lot about Levi’s land and the lore of the Gods. Many Gods had plots of land or countries dedicated to them. The gods would take care of their own people and in return bestow power onto the people. All gods lived with their people and many had relations and children as a result. It was all balanced, beautiful and perfect until the gods started turning or dying. There was no real explanation in your books as to why it started happening, but you were pretty sure it was due to this woman who cursed Levi.

You jumped when a book was slammed in front of you. “Hange!”

Hange grinned at you. “I’ve found her!”

You stared at the book to see a woman with hair as red as fire and eyes as blue as the ocean. “Levi?”

Levi placed his paws on the table and looked. “That’s her.” He hissed. “Evil woman.”

You massaged your fingers into Levi’s chest to soothe him. “What does it say?”

Hange sat down and sighed. “It just says she was a young god who was told she was a gift. They pushed her to be above other gods when it comes to her power and control. People made her sound more important than she was and she believed it.” Hange shook her head. “Gods started dying or becoming dragons after she started gaining power. She is the God of this land where the city is.” Hange tapped her finger on the table. “This is her land.”

You hugged Levi. “So, what do we do now?”

Hange frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s clear that she became consumed by the idea of power and the need for it. So, as a result, she started trying to gain more power and become the only god there is. However, a lot of gods were attached to their people as if they were family. So, she got rid of them the best way she knew how. She cursed gods, killed gods and even got people to kill their followers.”

Hange hummed as she thought. “We need evidence of this.” She drummed her fingers on the table. “We need a confession or a copy of the orders she made about this all.”

Levi nuzzled against you. “That’ll be hard. Her followers are incredibly delusional and loyal.”

You kissed the top of Levi’s head. “We’ll need some help.”

Hange grinned. “Erwin.”

You stood up and adjusted Levi in your arms. “Bring the book. He’ll want to see.”

Hange hugged the book to her chest. “Stealing a book from the King? Exciting!”

You opened your side bag. “Put it in here with my magic books.”

Hange shoved it in. “Perfect!”

You walked with Hange to the doors and found the King ready to enter. “Good afternoon, your majesty.”

Rolf smiled a little. “Hello. Did you have fun in my library?”

“We did. We’re just about to take a trip into the city.”

“That so? I could accompany you.”

Hange grinned. “We’re okay! It’s just a trip to meet an old friend and then we’re coming right back.”

Rolf eyed you and then your cat. “You want to avoid me in my own home?”

You smiled softly at the King. “Your humour is very dry but good.”

Rolf smirked. “You got that from the way I spoke?”

You nodded and adjusted Levi. “Yes.” You kissed the top of Levi’s head. “My fiancé has a dry humour and I like it.”

“You’re engaged? Heimdall told me that he was trying to marry you, so it seems like he messed up. You are already with someone.”

You nodded. “Happily. I will be marrying him and having children.”

Rolf chuckled. “What a strange man Heimdall is.” He shook his head. “I never cared much for the mages of light. I suppose he’s trying to be desperate and hold onto this whole magic thing with his people being greater due to a god’s blessing.” He wrinkled his nose. “I don’t like this god. The woman with hair of fire. I read this book about her and she seemed like a selfish god.” He looked disgusted. “I have suspicions about her.”

You gazed at Rolf. “What god do you follow?”

He opened his hand to show you magic like yours swirling in his hand. “I follow a god that was accused of wickedness.”

You gasped at his magic that looked just like your own. “Your magic…”

He chuckled. “I use a conduit to help me. It used to be a book, but now I use the stones in my cufflinks.”

You placed Levi down and inspected Rolf’s cufflinks. You welled up before looking into Rolf’s eyes. “I’m not alone. Can you fly?”

“I can.”

You smiled through your tears. “You’re like me!”

Rolf tilted his head and looked at the bracelet you had and the ring. “These stones…” He frowned. “Levi. Levi is my God.” He pulled out a book and opened it to show you full of old rune writing. “This was passed down to me by my family. They spoke of stories of a wronged God that was cursed for simply wanting to protect his people. He was locked away after coming across some of his people who had been slaughtered by a leader of the mages of light and his so-called god.”

Levi turned into his normal form and yanked Rolf into the library. He shoved the king against the wall and glared. “Are you really from my people?”

Rolf’s eyes widened. “My god, my dear god Levi.” He dropped to his knees. “You awoke! How? I thought you were lost to us.” He gasped. “The prophecy! You found your soulmate?”

Levi blushed. “Yes.”

Rolf looked over at you and stood. “I can understand it. You are a vision. Thank you for freeing our God.”

Levi placed his hand on Rolf’s chest. “His soul…it holds no lies.” He smiled a little. “And I can read his powers. He is a descendent of one of my people.”

You fumbled a little with your bag and pulled out the book you were trying to steal. “This book. Is this the one you read?”

Rolf nodded. “Yes. I’ve been searching for the truth, but I’ve only been king for a short time.” He took the book from you and looked sad. “I just want justice. My ancestor’s people were almost wiped out because of this evil woman. I want justice.”

“That’s what I want!”

He smiled at you. “Really? That’s amazing! We’ll work together! Is your friend you’re going to meet wanting to help too?”

You nodded. “Yes.”

“May I go with you?”

Hange leaned in. “I hate to break it to you, but we can’t go running around with the King.”

Rolf clapped his hands together. “I will wear a disguise! Please let me go! I want to help.”

Levi hummed in thought. “I can help him.” He clicked his fingers so Rolf looked different. “Let’s go.”

You gazed up at the home in the middle of the forest. You had thought Erwin was in the city, but he wasn’t. You’d spent a few hours journey to his home. You were excited to see your old friend, but at the same time, you were nervous. Erwin had done so much for you to escape and now you were right back where you’d started. You felt like you’d let him down a little.

Levi held your hand tightly. “Are you okay?”

You kissed Levi’s shoulder. “Yes.”

“You can talk to me.”

You sighed as you snuggled up to him in the carriage. “I just…well…I’m worried about Erwin. I feel like he might be shocked at finding out that I’m here. I ran away with his help and yet here I am.”

Levi bit your neck. “No.”

You flinched. “Ow. Why did you bite me?”

“Because you’re thinking bad things and you’re thinking of another man.” He nuzzled the crook of your neck. “You’re mine.”

You hummed a laugh. “I am yours, yes, but I’m just saying that he’s a dear friend of mine and he helped me escape a toxic relationship. He helped me live this life. If it weren’t for Erwin, we wouldn’t be together.”

Levi sighed a little. “You’re right. I would like to thank him.”

You kissed Levi’s cheek before getting out of your carriage and approaching the home. “Erwin?”

The door opened allowing the tall blonde to step out. He smiled softly when he recognised you. He called your name. “Good to see you.”

“You too.” Your eyes lit up when you saw a little girl stumble out of his home. You were surprised to see a girl just over one walking out. She was as cute as a button and looked like her daddy. “Oh, hello! I guess a lot happened in the two years I’ve been gone.”

Erwin scooped her up. “Lilly! Careful where you go.” He chuckled. “Sorry. She likes to run out of the house and get outside like her mother.”

“Mother?” You gazed at a woman hurrying out in a sweet dress and thigh-highs. You smiled at her dark hair framing her face and curvy figure. “She’s beautiful, Erwin.”

Erwin smiled as his wife hurried over. “She sure is. Hello, darling kitten.” He kissed her and hummed. “Kat, this is my friend I told you about.”

Kat beamed a bright smile. “Hi, hello, I’m Kat and Erwin’s wife. This little terror is our daughter, Lilly.”

You giggled. “She’s so cute. I’m happy that Erwin managed to escape and find love.”

“We escaped together. I was studying with him because our magic is similar and we weren’t accepted. After he helped you leave, he told me how he felt and I confessed too. We ran after that and haven’t looked back.”

You tickled Lilly’s cheek. “Your daughter is beautiful.”

“Thank you.” She waved you closer. “Come on in, all of you. Our home is big and cosy.”

You moved inside and found a seat. “I love how warm it is.”

“Thanks. I’ll get you all tea.”

Erwin carried his daughter and put her in a little chair and handed her some toys. “Wait there, my little flower.” He sighed and welcomed Hange, Levi and Rolf into his home. “I’m guessing this is about you escaping?”

You shook your head. “No, it’s about him.”

Erwin stared at Levi. “And who is he?”

Levi sighed. “I am a God. I am Levi.”

Erwin’s eyes widened. “The cursed God. I can’t believe you’re in my home and with my dear friend.” Erwin looked over at you. “You’re the soulmate in the prophecy?”

You blushed and nodded in response. “Yeah.”

Erwin sat down. “Huh…”

Hange grinned. “If you think that’s weird, the guy here in disguise is Rolf the King! He’s linked to Levi’s dead people!”

Rolf offered his hand. “Lovely to meet you.”

Erwin shook Rolf’s hand. “You…too…Wait, I am confused about what is going on.”

Rolf handed the book over. “Be careful not to describe her or say her name.”

Erwin frowned. “Why?”

Kat sat next to Erwin and looked at the book. “Is she bad?”

Levi gulped hard. “She placed a curse on me. Whenever people describe her or say her name I get consumed by rage and being turned into a dragon is accelerated. Gods turn into dragons when a bad emotion is increased, such as rage and greed.”

“That makes sense and is absolutely wonderful.” She called your name. “Come with me. I want you to tell me this cute story about dragons ‘cause I want to tell it to Lilly.”

Levi gave your hand a gentle squeeze. “I’ll talk to Erwin. Go have a nice time.”

You kissed Levi. “I love you.”

“Love you always.”

You walked with Kat over to her daughter. You smiled as Lilly squealed in delight at seeing her mummy. “She’s so precious.”

Kat hummed a laugh. “She is. I can’t believe you’re with a God. Are you thinking about having kids? They’d be demi-gods, right?”

You ruffled your hair and thought about Levi’s golden cum. “Ah, yeah on all. There is a chance…” You blushed hard. “I better tell you about dragons then, huh?”

Levi watched you rub your belly with a little blush. He pulled his eyes away and thought about his golden cum. He smiled a little knowing you were thinking about kids. He looked back to Erwin as Hange explained everything that you’d discovered so far. He heard Rolf explain his findings too but he knew a lot of the mess already. Levi’s main focus was on you and how you played with Lilly and touched your belly sometimes.

Levi zoned back into the conversation around him. “I want justice because I have someone I want to protect. If I don’t stop this woman, there might be a chance she’ll come back. I don’t want my soulmate to get hurt because of something in my past.”

Erwin hummed in response as he thought everything over. “I want to help you all, but getting involved would mean putting my wife and daughter at risk. I’m sorry. I want to help, but I can’t.”

“I understand.” Levi stood up and called to you. “We’re leaving.”

You handed Lilly over to Kat. “Leaving?” You ran over to Levi. “How come we’re leaving?”

“If we stay here we’ll be wasting our time.”

You ran outside with him. “Levi?”

He stopped and turned to you. “He can’t help us. We’re asking too much of him. Too many people have died because of me. I don’t want more people to die. Erwin has a wife and child, he has found his peace and fought for it, but we’re coming in and taking it away from him. This woman is a risk to them and I can’t do it.”

You cupped his face. “Levi, breathe.”

He shook a little. “Dragon?”

You nodded and smiled a little. “It’ll be okay. We’re okay.”

He kissed you and sighed through his nose. “I love you. I love you so much. We can live a quiet life in my old land, right?” He smiled a little. “We’ll raise many sweet children together.”

You nibbled your lip. “What if you turn into a dragon?”

“I will go to my world to calm down before that happens.”

“But you didn’t calm down last time, I had to turn you back.” You welled up. “Levi, is there no turning back once you’re a dragon?”

He sighed. “I can be turned back. You can turn me back with your love. You are my saviour.”

You cupped Levi’s face. “Are you sure you want to just walk away from finding the truth?”

“I know the truth.”

You released Levi’s face. “You do?”

He smiled and nodded. “Yes. The truth is I love you more than anything in this world. You are my soulmate. You are the love of my life. You are my everything. I can’t wait to marry you. Oh, and I am sure that our romantic night of making love involving my gold cum being poured into you over and over again may have resulted in a successful pregnancy.” He wrapped his arms around you. “That’s the truth.”

You leaned into Levi’s embrace and held him back. “Yeah, you’re right.” You squeezed him. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m happy as long as I have you.”

You frowned at your name being shouted. “Levi!” You pulled from Levi and looked to the house to see Erwin walking towards you with his wife following.

Levi squeezed you. “I wonder what they want with us.”

Erwin stopped in front of you. “My wife made something clear to me about everything. I said I wouldn’t help for the same reasons you’re asking for help. You want to protect the woman you love from someone terrible. You will have to fight your curse over and over again. There might be a time when you can’t and your wife and my friend will be left alone with her children.”

“Possibly, yes.”

Erwin shook his head. “I can’t let that happen. Forgive me for rejecting it right away. Let me help.”

Levi sighed. “I don’t want more people to get hurt because of me. It is best if we walk away.”

“Others are at risk. She will come for you again, along with everyone you care about.” He grabbed Levi’s upper arm. “She will kill every single magic-user not blessed with her power. Even if you make my friend a god with you, she could still be killed or cursed. We have to stop this god to save not only you but countless others.” Erwin gripped Levi’s arm. “She will not show my daughter and wife any mercy, will she?”

Levi shook his head. “No…her people when they came for me slaughtered everyone.” He lowered his head. “She doesn’t care whom she kills.”

Erwin released Levi. “I’ll help you. I’m doing this for my friend and my family.”

Kat smiled softly. “We’ll help you research this. We want you to have happiness. I don’t think any of us will be free until she’s stopped.”

You nibbled your lip. “Thank you.” You rubbed your tears away. “Thank you.”

Erwin hugged you. “Forgive me for refusing at first. My wife made it clear to me that if we don’t help then you and Levi will be denied the life I have. You deserve happiness and to be with Levi. She destroyed lives and is responsible for killing a lot of people in our past. We have to do this to save our daughter from a terrible future.”

You stepped back from Erwin and sighed. “This is going to be a tough fight ahead, isn’t it?”

“Likely.”

Levi pulled you close. “It will.”

You stuck your tongue out a little as you focused hard on putting together a wooden staff with rune carvings and a crystal at the top. You wanted it to be perfect so you could be more powerful and protect your friends and family. You had a lot more to fight for compared to before Levi entered your life. For so long you were lonely with no one around you, but now you had new friends and a dedicated lover.

“Spell bunny.”

You looked up at Levi and smiled. “Hey.”

Levi sat down and watched what you were doing. “It looks wonderful. I will place some of my power into it.”

“Oh, you don’t need to.”

“I want to.” He placed his hand on it and ran his fingers over the wood making it sparkle. “I want to help.”

“Thank you.” You blushed a little as you watched his fingers closely. “You’re good with your hands.”

Levi smirked. “You know that very well, don’t you?”

You whined a little. “I suppose.”

Levi chuckled. “I can’t believe you went to the city and got the King on your side and others to help you fight the goddess.” He leaned closer and kissed your cheek. “You are unbelievable.” He kissed you and smiled. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He sighed and looked around. “Erwin’s home is nice.”

You smiled a little. “I like it. I feel bad we’ve been living here for two weeks while we research though.” You giggled when you saw Lilly running around and squealing in delight as Hange played with her. “Must be nice.”

Levi lay down with his head on your lap. “You would be a wonderful mother.”

You put your staff down and played with Levi’s hair. “Thank you. So, umm…” You blushed a little.

Levi took your hand and covered it in kisses. “Talk to me.”

You let out a long sigh. “I keep thinking about the night you returned and your golden cum…would…am…well…”

“Likely. I am unsure if my spell will work to stop children from being made.” He rolled onto his side and gazed at your belly. “A sweet baby.” He touched your stomach. “I am sorry if it is too fast, but it is hard to stop the seed of a god.”

You shifted a little. “I suppose you’re right.” You smiled as you watched Erwin pick up his little girl and toss her in the air making her giggle. “I can imagine you with a few kids. It’s making my heart flutter.”

Levi looked over at Erwin. “Like Erwin and Lilly?”

“Yes.”

Levi smiled softly. “I love you so much.”

You looked down at Levi. “I love you too.” You sighed. “I should get back to making this staff.”

Levi sat up and pouted. “I wanted to snuggle more.”

You grabbed your staff. “I know, but the sooner I make this perfect the better.”

“You really wanna fight for me, don’t you?”

“I do.”

Levi blushed hard. “You’re so cute.”

You winked at him. “Thanks.”

He watched you weave your magic into the wood and decorate it. “You’ll be really powerful with this.”

“That’s what I’m hoping.” You picked up your book and flicked through the pages. “I have to make sure that this is perfect.”

“You don’t need to.”

“I do. If I don’t get this right, you could die or be lost to your dragon form.” You welled up. “I can’t lose you and if I am pregnant then our baby or babies can’t lose you.”

Levi shuffled closer and placed his hand on your belly. “You’re incredible.”

“Thank you.” You got up from the floor and grinned “I think my staff is ready!”

“Let’s see what you can do.”

You spun your staff around in your hand before throwing it up and making it float. You floated and put your arms out causing the wind to flow around you. Your dark magic energy shot up from the circle around you and danced like flames. You caught your staff and slammed it down into the earth making trees, rocks and a river appear with a burst of energy. Flowers bloomed and nature jumped out of trees and the water.

You dropped down and gasped in delight. “I did it!”

Levi walked closer at this new little area you’d made. “This is incredible.”

You jumped up and down. “I’m so strong!”

Levi turned to you and cupped your face. “You’re perfection.” He kissed you and sighed through his nose. “You’re everything to me. I’m so proud of you.”

“I think I can use this to fight as well.”

“You can use it to protect people too.”

Your eyes sparkled in delight. “Yay!” You giggled in delight. “I can’t wait to help everyone!”

Levi hummed a laugh. “You can.”

“I’m glad.”

Erwin ran over. “I felt a burst of magic!” He slowed down and stared at what you’d created. “What…wow…did you make all this?”

You nodded and showed him your staff. “This helped me. I made it so I could enhance my power.”

Erwin took the staff and inspected it. “This is incredible stuff. You’re impressive.”

You blushed hard. “Thanks.”

Erwin frowned a little. “All this power was inside you? This seems almost god-level stuff and you’re not a god.”

Levi walked over and gulped. “Perhaps she has a bit of god inside her.”

Erwin’s brow raised. “Are you being rude?”

You blushed bright red. “He is suggesting that I am with child.”

Erwin looked at what you’d made. “I would agree. From my studies of magic users, this isn’t normal.” He glanced down at you. “Congratulations. I think it is clear you are.”

Your cheeks burned. “So soon…”

Levi gulped hard. “Sorry.”

You smiled at Levi. “Don’t be. I’m just worried you might be upset that I am, that maybe you’d wanna leave me because I got pregnant so fast.”

Levi cupped your face. “I love it. You’re the love of my life and I want a family with you. I would have been excited if you got pregnant after our first time together.” He held your waist and growled. “Mine. My soulmate.”

You gulped hard. “Yes.”

He kissed you and moaned against your lips. “We will stop this goddess.”

You nodded. “Yes. So, umm do you know if I am? How many?”

Levi placed his hand on your belly making his hand glow and you. His eyes widened. “Twins, a boy and a girl.”

You welled up. “Really?”

Levi cried and nodded as he laughed. “Yes!” He picked you up and spun around with you. “Our sweet little spell bunnies. You are a blessing in my life.” He kissed you and moaned against your lips. “My love, we have to be extra careful now.”

You sighed and nodded. “I know, but I want to help you and the others. I want to fight.”

Levi put you on your feet and tapped his forehead against yours. “You are my everything and more. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to marry you and make you a goddess. We really need to go to my world for that.”

Erwin smiled. “Well, it’s quiet here right now. So, why don’t you go there next? Possibly tomorrow?”

Levi nodded. “I think we shall. We’ll run there, meet my mother and I’ll start making you a goddess with the special drink of the gods.”

You cuddled Levi. “What is it like?”

He hummed. “Well, it’s sweet like custard.”

You gasped in delight. “Delicious.” You blushed a little. “We better start making a room for the twins, huh?”

He picked you up. “Yes, but let’s focus on our trip tomorrow.”

Erwin shook his head as he gazed at what you made. “Thank you for adding more to my home.”

You kicked your legs and giggled. “You’re most welcome.”

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white-poppie · 2 years

Text

Baby, I am scared!

Content warning: blood, crying(a lot of it), death, imprisonment, miscommunication (Teratophilia?), over-drinking of blood (is that a thing?), Dub-con (not nsfw however.) Genre: SUPERNATURAL! AU: The characters as mystical creatures (multi), ANGST

🎶 : "As the hours pass, I will let you know. That I need to ask; before I'm alone." --After Dark, Mr Kitty

His heart ached for you, to have fallen for such a pitiful creature, but alas! Mortals rarely ever know, how to contain their desires.

He could never be by your side, you knew that! Why are you crying in front of him then?

The fat tears that rolled down your face, almost made him reach out and comfort you, but he stayed, as still as a statue.

"I am bound to this place," he said, "you know I cannot leave. Find someone well, someone human,"

His last words made you flinch. His stoniness broke when he saw your response. His monstrously, huge hands reached out to caress your face.

You closed your eyes to devour the feeling--nothing pricked your skin. You carefully opened your eyes and as soon as you did, you wished you hadn't, an echoing wail left your throat piercing through the walls like the cupid's arrow.

The first rays of the sun had turned him back to stone.--the way it was supposed to be.

(Megumi, Hawks, Aizawa, Illumi, Near, Iwaizumi, Bokuto Mattsun, Makoto, Shinichiro, Muto, Kisaki, Kakucho, Wakasa, Shion, Takeomi) As a GARGOYLE

🎶 : "I don't want to be afraid, the deeper that I go, It takes my breath away."--House of Memories by Panic at Disco

"You have to run, you have to go!" He shouted, his voice reverberating beautifully across the walls of the cave, you were entranced, even when he wasn't using his magic.

"They'll take you hostage if they ever see a human with my kind!."

His blue tail glimmered under the faint moonlight, scales shining like pearls deep under the sea. He was the sea. He was ancient and he was the last of his kind.

"Go," he yelled ever so melodiously, "run before the catch, you and never come back!"

"I can't- I love you!" you screamed.

"I don't!" he growled, eyes turning green as you fell away from the water source, "leave Y/N, don't make me use my powers on you."

"You wouldn't- you promised," your voice cracked as you pleaded.

"Promises are mere words when you are few of the last of species," he shrugged, "Besides, I am not doing this for anything, as baseless as feelings, I just pity you, I am stronger than all the men in your town combines, I'll escape, but no way, I'll help you if you get trapped."

"You...are a monster!" you cried out, stumbling away from the rocks.

A monster, huh? He could live with that. The faint shouting of the pirates was audible clearly, maybe if he submitted himself, they would be kinder, gentler, nicer...less monster-like.

He laughed tearfully, staring at the moon. Humans are truly the real monsters.

(Gojo, Getou, Bakugo, Kurapika, Oikawa, Kageyama, Izana, Mitsuya) as a SIREN

🎶 : "And God knows, I'm not dying but I bleed now, and God knows, it's the only way to heal now."--My Blood, Ellie Goulding

"I am gonna kill you, I am gon' fucking kill you, I can't do this!" he rasped, but the desire in his voice and quiver in his eyes was fixated on your neck.

You pitied him, he had been resisting for so long. He was hungry and tired. The sleeplessness in his drooping eyes and weakness in his flail arms clearly showed it.

"It's okay, you can drink a little, I'll tell you when to stop," you whispered.

His eyes lit up a little, yet he was cautious," really?"

You pulled down your top a little to expose your collarbone, "I trust you."

As soon as the statement left your lips, he was plunging his fangs into your flesh, he groaned in delight at how sweet you tasted, energy coming back to him and his ears rang with a carnal desire: more.

At first, it felt like a mosquito bite, painless, but slowly your body started to feel cold. Pins and needles accompanied the feeling of helplessness and your voice died in your throat. You patted his back to warn him about the blood loss, but he was too drowned in ecstasy to care.

Black spots danced in your vision as you whispered again to stop until you fell limp in his arms.

His eyes snapped open as he wiped the blood off his chin, his impotent sobs echoing through the walls of the cathedral. After that he made sure to get you to a medic.

That was the last you will see of him. Hundreds of years have passed and yet every time he drinks blood from a passerby, he is reminded of your cold body. Who knew a blood-sucking freak like him could bleed in pain?

(Yuuji, Nanami, Mikey, Chifuyu, Daichi, Tsukishima, Kenma, Izuku, Denki, Kirishima, L, Hanma) As a VAMPIRE

🎶 : "Who's that I see walkin' in these woods? Why it's Little Red Riding Hood"--Lil' red riding hood by Sam The Sham & The Pharaohs

You had no idea how, but you had tamed the big, bad wolf. But tonight he wasn't acting obedient.

"Yeah? You are gonna kill me? Put a silver bullet through my heart, make it quick!" he growled, his already large form, looking ginormous as you shrank in fear. What had irked him? Only the heavens knew.

"I-I wouldn't dare," you squeaked, your voice betraying you.

"Oh, please, I heard your little first talk about our kind, and you didn't disagree," he laughed, betrayed.

Your eyes widened as you remembered your loud-mouthed friend spewing nonsense that you were ignoring, "I wasn't-."

"I bet after I left you must have said something like, 'Oh how someone like them? The transformation, the primal drive, the bestiality? If I could kill them, I would!"

"I would never, I love you! I wasn't even listening to her!" you shouted angrily.

"Spare the explanations," he shouted, "I had trusted a human once, I was foolish to trust again." You knew the scar on his hand was a reminder of his distrust towards humans, and yet you pursued him, when he finally opened up to you, the house of cards came toppling down.

His intent was murderous so the best decision was to crawl away.

He regretted it. He wished he hadn't let his fears control him--maybe you wouldn't have been named a witch by your townsfolk. On that day you were there to tell him about how your friend had seen you with him and how the church knew.

Your silent cry of life was never heard. All you wanted to do was to live...

( Toji, Baji, Kazutora, Shion, Draken, Kuroo, Akashi, Chrollo, Mello ) As a WEREWOLF

Tags: @rintaroubby @nanaseishiro, @akumicchi, @oikawatoorupdf @denkis111, @jazzylove,@lordmypantsaresocool, @futuristicallykawaiiturtle, @kristaline2dmensimp, @repostingmyfavs, @innerpurple, @katsukichu, @renster05, @navaratna, @sakinotfound. @nanaseishiro, @thegrayladyislookingforyou

╰┈➤ Book order details (Request Rules) ╰┈➤ Special customers(Taglist)

Also Check out: L'appel du vide

Synopsis: Your husband, Hanma Shuji is dead! You team up with Tachibana Naoto, Chifuyu Matsuno, Ryuguji Ken and Mitsuya Takashi, you go on a journey full of betrayals and twists. Can you find out what really happened to your husband?

Requests are open (*3*) Reblog/like to give the author a hug (´;︵;)

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chungledown-bimothy · 2 years

Text

If I Loved You Less, I Might Be Able To Talk About It More

canon divergence from episode 3- battlemaster of ceremonies arranged marriage

Part Two

Rating: G

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1434

Part One: The News

“You will wed Delloso de la Rue. There will be no mistakes; you will regain the connection with their court that was taken from us.”

Captain K. P. Hob’s stomach dropped, and his heart skipped a beat. “My Lord and Lady, I do not have the ho- the dishonor of understanding you. With all due disrespect, why me? I hold no position in court, no power to strengthen with an alliance with the Court of Wonder. Neither does Delloso de la Rue, unless I am mistaken.”

Lord Blemish and Lady Boil snarled, and Boil spoke. “What you do have is the eye and respect of the Bloom. Something no other goblin has been honorable enough to achieve.”

Blemish started speaking, as Boil retched from the thought of a goblin being honorable.

“The Court of Wonders said very little about their reasons for suggesting the arrangement, just that they wished to repair the relationship between our two courts. The Lords of the Wing ensuring that your victory in the duel yesterday reflected poorly on Rue certainly didn’t help their standing in court.

As for us, this alliance will further more powerful ones in the future, and it will put you in an even stronger position to find out whose fault this all is in the first place. Perhaps things might have been different had you been successful in performing the one task that was assigned to you before we arrived.”

Hob took a deep breath, squared his shoulders, and stood up as straight as he could while still looking at people so much shorter than himself. “Very well. Is the Court of Wonders having a similar conversation with R- with them, or shall I be the one to tell them?” He would never dare to ask it of his superiors directly, but he desperately hoped he wouldn’t have to. How could I tell them we are to be married, when they were so offended by my actions during the Hunt?

“It’s been handled. Go, find your betrothed.” Hob gave an elaborate salute and walked away. My god, how can a lifetime shackled to me be anything but painful to them, when a single attempt at kindness and civility was odious to them to the point of moving them to tears? A small act of affection was abhorrent enough to engage their honor. I must make this as easy for them as possible; they shall never know how deep my affection for them truly runs. “To part the seeing from the being is the greatest goodness goblins get.” I can do this.

—

Delloso de la Rue slid down the wall and sat on the floor, reading the words over and over again.

In light of rumors, scandals, and events both past and recent, an agreement has been reached with the Goblin Court. You are to marry Captain K. P. Hob shortly after the conclusion of the Bloom, before the assembled fey depart. This should provide ample time for you to plan an appropriate event without eclipsing your wonderful work on the Bloom.

You are free to make the announcement as you see fit, provided it occurs within the next three days. Perhaps at tomorrow’s tea.

“Wuvvy? Wuvvy, please come here.” Almost as soon as the words were out of their mouth, Wuvvy ran through the door. She looked around, wide eyed and almost frantic, before looking down and spotting Rue.

“O- oh my god what happened?! Are you okay?” Without a word, they handed the letter up to her. She knelt down next to them as she read it. “I- what?! Is this for real?”

Rue nodded, still not looking at her. “Official seal and all. This is happening, and all I can do now is throw the best wedding-” their voice broke and they shook their head slightly. “The best wedding anyone here has ever seen. Whatever happens after that happens, I cannot worry about it yet. Come, Wuvvy, we have much to do and not nearly enough time to do it. First, I suppose there is a conversation I must have.” They stood up, squared their shoulders, nodded to Wuvvy, and departed in search of Hob, leaving Wuvvy standing in the doorway stunned and open-mouthed.

—

They found each other on the southern lawn, not ten paces from the dueling ground. They both began speaking at the same time.

“Dell-”

“Capta-”

“My apologies, go-”

“No no, you first.”

They locked eyes, both falling silent. Many heavy moments passed before Rue broke both the silence and the eye contact.

“Captain, good afternoon. How are you feeling, are you recovered from yesterday? I know Wuvvy’s sword is… different… from those you may have encountered before.”

Hob paused for a moment, then he stood up even straighter and nodded. “Good afternoon, Rue. I appreciate the sentiment, but I assure you, I am quite well. It takes more than a bit of poison to slow me down.”

“That’s good to hear. Shall we walk? Given the news that I must assume you also received this morning, it would be best if we are seen together at least some before any announcement is made, lest there be rumors about whats, whens, wheres, and whys.” They hesitantly offered their arm.

“Oh, um, yes, I suppose so.” He took their arm, and they began walking aimlessly in charged, but not uncomfortable, silence for some time, before Hob stopped and met Rue’s eyes once more.

“Before any proceedings… proceed…” he took a deep breath. “You deserve nothing less than a love match, Rue, and I am truly sorry that our hands have been forced like this. As there’s nothing you nor I can do to alter the situation, I want you to know that I am aware that my words and actions during the Hunt were so offensive as to bring you to tears. There are vows in our future that will be made out of duty, but right here and now, I vow to you, not out of duty to my court but out of the honor you once said you appreciated, that I will endeavor to avoid any similarly upsetting behavior. "

They opened their mouth to reply once, twice, thrice. “I-” they cleared their throat. “I appreciate the sentiment, Captain, but I assure you, I took no offense. You have done nothing wrong. In fact, I owe you an apology, for Wuvvy and the duel. There was a misunderstanding, and it is entirely my fault.” They took Hob’s arm again, turned, and began walking. “You deserve more than this arrangement as well, you know. Although love matches may be off the table for us, friendships are just as worth cherishing and celebrating as romance- what say you to building a strong one in each other? Till death do us part is far too long for us fey to not have something.”

When they said ‘love matches are off the table’, Hob’s ears fell flat, and he stumbled slightly. “A friendship would indeed be splendid.” Rue noticed the reluctant tone, but they missed his body language.

“Wonderful. Now that we are on the same page there, the next issue is announcing our engagement. I have some thoughts, but as this very much affects you, do you have any preferences for how we should go about it?”

“Unless you would like a militaristic approach to our… impending nuptials, I fear I am entirely out of my depth. As evidenced by millennia of Blooms, your taste and planning abilities are immaculate; I am quite happy to defer all decisions to you and follow any and all ord-” he cleared his throat. “Directions to make things as easy as possible for you. It takes two to wed, of course, but I fear I am not good for much beyond seeing through tasks assigned to me.”

“I’m afraid I will have to disagree with you on that last point, Captain. You are good at and for a great many things. However, we can discuss that more later. As for making the announcement, everyone will be gathered tomorrow for tea. I won’t pretend to know goblin military customs- do you have a particular uniform for special occasions?”

“I have pants!” Hob grinned and tapped the bottom of his halberd on the ground.

“I, um. Lovely. Wear them to tea, then?”

“Very well, I shall wear pants to tea tomorrow.”

At that moment, they both noticed that they’d wandered to the edge of the woods. Without a word, Hob let go of Rue’s arm, and they both turned and walked away, much quicker than they’d been walking before.

#acofaf #a court of fey and flowers #acofaf fanfiction #d20 fanfiction #battlemaster of ceremonies #captain kp hob #kp hob #delloso de la rue #i haven't written in so long im terrified #but i have to get this out before i lose my nerve #i write sometimes

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digitalgate02 · 2 months

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One thing i’ve been discussing after i had a friend watching 02TB in my country was that the movie does not feel afraid to show the imperfections of every character and how they being like that is what makes them and their relationship with their digimon stronger.

02TB is about communication, but also about imperfection. Rui had a bad life before Ukkomon stepped in, and then Rui’s life changed for the better, except it was not perfect at all. Rui claims his relationship with Ukkomon was perfect, but then later the group points out it wasn’t. Because neither Rui or Ukkomon knew each other like they believed they did.

But the whole discussion was that this friend who watched the movie criticized Hikari standing on Ukkomon’s side, making her get this heavy criticism from a few Japanese fans (yes, said friend speak Japanese and also showed me the tweets too), about how Hikari was invalidating how Rui felt and such.

My other friend, who had watched the movie before me and during her trip in Japan (who also speak Japanese), had a different view of that scene – That Hikari was actually calling Ukkomon pathetic for all those things he was trying to do, not pitying him as some sort of “victim”. And this is where we started discussing the movie’s themes.

If you know Yagami Hikari and her popularity status, you will notice people would rather pin her as “Waifu” or “perfect girl” (even in-universe, I suppose) – And not many people tend to know her real bad side or her inner problems (which you can read Shiha’s overview of the character in her meta blog), and no, it’s not the “brocon” thing (this never was part of Hikari’s entire character, it was only brought by two guests in Adv’99 and 02 respectively, NOT by the entire staff) – it’s the part of Hikari being manipulative, sly and even troll-ish kind of girl.

But in this movie we see she can also be insensitive sometimes, just like her brother is (look, i love Taichi, but let’s be real: most of his issues with Sora in Adv’99/OWG were because he was way more tactless than being Sora being too sensitive) – and i think it adds a new layer to the character, breaking the idea she’s “perfect”.

And according to the friend who i was talking with, Hikari’s line is what leads Daisuke to reverse Rui’s words and questions into making the new and mysterious boy realize his life and relationship with Ukkomon were not perfect as he imagined it were.

Speaking of Ukkomon, he’s also the embodiment of this theme: When Rui tells the group that Ukkomon can realize wishes, the flashbacks puts into question another view: If Ukkomon is that powerful, then why would he have to use his tentacles to control the corpses of Rui’s parents? Why didn’t he just cure Rui’s dad instead? And so do other things Rui claimed and were debunked by the flashbacks.

Ukkomon might be related to something bigger, yes, that i have no doubt of it (considering that him getting defeated resulted in the digivices not being needed anymore!) but i don’t think he’s some sort of god-tier digimon. He might be related to the same entity (entities?) connected to Homeostasis (which is not a god, it’s more likely a “Security system”) and the Holy Beasts, who were the ones we know to have been selecting children in both Adv’99 and 02.

I loved this movie for showing that it’s okay to be imperfect and that communication is essential in our lives. So this is why it ends with Rui and Ukkomon finally having a talk and discovering more about themselves, about things Rui likes and dislikes. And this is also why Rui gets the egg back and in the post-credits the egg shakes as if it was about to hatch: They were already to start from zero, again.

So, are Hikari's and everyone else’s portrayals supposed to be PERFECT in this movie? Nope, that’s the thing. The movie is, I repeat, about communication and imperfection.

Thanks for coming to my Digi-Talk ✌

#02tb spoilers #ni's digitheories #digimon adventure 02 the beginning

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001-lvr · 2 years

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can you write more about dad!peter please? i love your fics omg!!! TY!!!

A/N: OF COURSE!!!🫶🏽🫶🏽🤗 thank you for the request!! AND TUANK YOU SO MICH!! IM GLAD YOU ENJOY MY FICS!!🫶🏽🫶🏽❤️❤️

The little things (Dad!peter)

Summary: Just Peter and his daughter having a conversation about his time in the lab! The child in this fic is a girl called Madison (Maddie for short)

The 13 year old girl was sat on the couch in their livingroom while y/n was upstairs catching up on some work. Her dad was also on the couch and they were talking about what it was like to be a guard.

“So you’re telling me, you and mom both worked in a lab? Where there were bald kids everywhere who had powers? And you were a guard? And mom was a nurse? And you escaped?” Maddie was bewildered, she had never been told this before. Peter nodded. “Exactly. But it wasn’t as fun as I first made it out to be. You see, I had been in that lab for many years. Since I was a child. You might not believe me when I say this but, I have abilities just like those children did. And I was the first one to be in the lab under the care of Dr Martin Brenner. He tattooed a number on my wrist, and I still have it. As I grew, he took my dna and put it in the children so they too had my abilities, and he would train them to get stronger and stronger. But don’t worry, they aren’t my children just because they have some of my dna. And though I was growing up, I could never escape. I was given the job as a guard. To make sure the kids weren’t doing anything that would put them or anyone else in danger. But I had a limit on what I could say to them. I wasn’t allowed to mention that I had abilities, I had to hide the number on my wrist. I couldn’t use my abilities anyway. I had a tracker in my neck, it weakened me and showed Dr Brenner where I was at all times. Any time I looked even the slightest bit suspicious to Brenner, he would punish me. But electrocuting the sides of my head. God, it was so painful. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. But then, I met your mother. She was so beautiful, I’m certain I fell in love straight away. It was 1971 when I met her. After a month of knowing eachother I asked her to be my girlfriend, in which she said yes. We dated secretly, and on our 2 year anniversary, we did…adult stuff. Yeah. And a week later we found out she was pregnant with you. We were so happy, yet so sad at the same time.” He was interrupted by an “ouch” from Maddie. (It was sarcasm of course) Peter laughed lightly and shook his head. “You know that isn’t what I meant. We were sad because we were stuck in the lab, and if we had a child here, they would have turned you into a test subject. Which we couldn’t allow. So, we did the most logical thing, and escaped. We both had to remove the trackers from our necks though, which was painful to say the least. But after, we were free. And we could bring you up in a nice environment. We wasted no time in buying a house and getting a nursery set up for you. And then you were born. Now, I wasn’t planning on saying any of this to you, but since I have abilities, it’s a big possibility that you will too.” Maddies eyes widened, and she suddenly felt uneasy. “But! Don’t panic. I’ll teach you how to control them. And I will never, ever train you like me and the rest of the children were in that lab. So I wouldn’t worry about it, okay? It’ll all be fine.” He said, and pulled her in for a hug, which she gladly returned.

This was a new beginning for the young girl, but luckily she had her dad to guide her through it. “Dad?”

“Yes?”

“Can i see the number on your wrist?“

“Yes of course.” Peter rolled his sleeve up to reveal a number on his wrist. ‘001’

“So, a real tattoo huh. Could you use your powers? I’ve never seen you use it before.” Peter sighed. The last time he used his abilities, he accidentally killed one of the guards, while he was trying to escape. But if his daughter also had abilities, he didn’t want her to be afraid to use them. So, he nodded. And got an empty Pepsi can in front of him. He used his mind and crushed it with ease, but it still caused a little nosebleed. He wiped it and looked back at his daughter, who nearly had her eyes bulging out of her head in amusement and excitement. “That’s so cool! So you’re saying i can learn to do that?!” Peter smiled. “Yes, and so much more. You’ll do great things, I just know it. So, what was your favourite part about my time in the lab?” He asked. He was curious.

“Hm, probably when you asked my mom out. But I hated the part where you got a tattoo done when you were a child, especially on your wrist. Oh, and you getting tortured. You didn’t even do anything wrong. But, I also hate thinking about the fact that I was conceived in a lab. It leads up to something cool though, you both escaped so we could all be a family. That’s some real superhero stuff right there.” Peter looked at his daughter and smiled, “yeah, real superhero stuff.”

Y/n watched from the doorway, and smiled. A genuine smile. She loved her family more than anything. Escaping was worth it.

#fluff #stranger things x reader #peter ballard #platonic #001 x reader #001 stranger things #pls request #pls reblog #slayed #stranger things #netflix #ok bye #goddamn

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cinnamonfridge · 6 months

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I just wanted to reach out and check in on you (even if I may be one of the last people you'd want to hear from. Valid.). There is a lot of nonsense being tossed around and I'm just aghast. I also wanted to apologize for my part in the CTT drama. You're right; the 3 Strike policy wasn't well thought through, but my *god*, they were just so exhausting. You are far stronger than I am, Claudia. Sorry to see you've been in the hospital again. Wishing you well. (...Samma, if that wasn't obvious.)

To be honest, I'm not overly thrilled about some things but they are just minor things really.

I actually had a lot of people asking me about your TikToks and uh... truth be told, until I saw this question I didn't even known your TikTok username so I hadn't even seen them until now.

But yeah, I actually sent the NaNoWriMo board a complete set of screenshots of the conversation I had with Marya and Letitia over the summer that also included Sarah, Heather, and Grant in it.

I hope the board, if nothing else, at least tells people the truth about what really happened and the fact that Marya, despite her claims to the contrary knew damn good and well I was still listed as a moderator of the Documentation category because one of the screenshots in that message is literally her saying she was okay with it!

Unfortunately, the board might not take kindly to one of the messages from Letitia, but I sincerely hope that when they read it they understand that it was from her frustration at the situation and that there wasn't really a way to clear the air about some of what was going on without destroying the community.

Sadly, all the shit going on right now? The screenshots prove I tried hard to get Marya to understand how bad things were and to get HQ to do something.

This entire dumpster fire was preventable if she had just listened to me. Hell, the real reason my removal notice never got posted? Letitia realized it was just going to inflame the situation and make it worse and quite likely would have caused the meltdown to happen months earlier.

#nanowrimo

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jessicaslittlelovesickmess · 2 years

Text

Sarah Paulson-Moving

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀• Angst,implication’s of cheating

As you were walking with Jessica you had heard the sound of her laughter, Sarah, you thought "hey you didn't tell me she was going to be here" looking up at a guilty Jessica "I'm sorry I didn't know" she grasped your hand. Entering the room you had spotted her and the new girl or woman should you say Sarah had left you for an older woman you turned ready to leave when suddenly "Y/n!" boomed through the crowded room turning around you plastered on a smile "oh hey Sarah barely recognised you, how are you?" trying to remain friendly but all you wanted to do was run off and cry.

Why could she move on? "I'm doing great" Sarah started "I'm Holland" the older woman introduced herself "I'm Y/n" giving her your hand to shake as your eyes begged Jessica to let you leave "it's nice to meet you" tears hiding behind your smile "likewise" Holland agreed finally letting go of your hand. "Want a drink? Sarah? Y/n?" she offered "no thank you" "Y/n doesn't drink anymore, but I'd love one thank you dear'' Sarah kissed Holland before sending her on her way "so older women huh?" you sadly chuckled ''just something we have in common I guess" Sarah joked along.

"How are you?" she asked it was something so small but set you off "how do you think I am Sarah?" you scoffed annoyed at her audacity "I'm sorry okay" looking at your teary eyes Sarah could've sworn she had seen your heart.

"Are you really... Sarah? it's funny because you always said id leave you for someone my own age but look at us, you left ME! was I not good enough? wasn't I old enough?" you darkly chucked Sarah only apologetically looked around the room. "Y/n you're causing a scene'' she gritted harshly gripping your arm ''ow Sarah you're hurting me'' her grip has gotten stronger as she pulled you into a random bedroom. ''Look I'm sorry Y/n I don't know what you want me to do?" she yelled her grip now bruising "Sarah let go" you cried but she still didn't let go "Sarah!" you screamed tears now racing down your cheeks "god I'm so sorry" Sarah finally let go.

Making your way across the room you finally looked at her she was different "you left me and didn't even think twice about it" muttering lightly as you sat on the bed "we could've been beautiful" Sarah's chuckle echoed sweetly as she came to sit beside you.

"Besides the obvious, how did we drift so far apart?" she asked "I'm not too sure" you both sat in silence for a moment "no one ever loved me like you" Sarah admitted gazing up at the ceiling "and no one ever will" you smiled sadly at her. "Our memories?" she had asked now looking at you "I had to burn it. all of it" you admitted "it hurts too much" now crying into your hand "I wish you knew how bad it fucked me up" now meeting her gaze.

"I never looked at anyone how I looked at you" Sarah knew it was the truth as she grasped your face gently "I know baby, I know" she cried "I love you and it's killing me" you kissed her hand before standing "but just like you, I must let go" walking towards the door looking back you smiled "don't forget me and all the things I did" finally leaving.

Jessica entered the room "Holland said to give you this" she handed the drink over sitting beside the younger blonde woman "why does it hurt so much?" Sarah asked laying her head on Jessica's shoulder "because it was real" she consoled. "She was extraordinary" Sarah spoke with a dreamy smile "she was the best thing that ever happened to me and I ruined it" she finally realised just too late.

#sarah paulson imagine #sarah paulson x reader #sarah paulson x holland taylor #jessica lange imagine

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treesap-blogs · 11 months

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Review for “A Blade So Black” by L.L. McKinney

Hello, Tumblrians! I thought I’d end up publishing my reviews in order of the date I finished them, but that’d mean I have several months of reviews to catch up on and…that’s as exhausting as it sounds.

So here, a book I just finished! While on that dreaded trip I was telling you guys about, too. No BDB, I just really like to add to my StoryGraph TBR with books that make it onto queer reading list posts, and the sequel (“A Dream So Dark”) was one I kept finding.

And I like retellings too, so there’s that.

A Blade So Black follows seventeen year-old Alice Kingston, meant to be a monster-fighting Buffy-esque interpretation of the titular character from the Alice In Wonderland story(as this is a retelling). Besides keeping gnarly creatures in the dream realm known as Wonderland at bay, she has to juggle her problems in real-life Atlanta—think a slipping GPA, best friends and coping with the ever-present grief following one year since the death of her father. But when a nasty encounter means that her mentor (and possible love interest) Addison Hatta gets poisoned, she has to go find the antidote deeper within Wonderland than she’s ever gone, before she can literally lose her head.

As you can see, it has an interesting premise! I like the darker reimagining of this story—although I know that’s been done before, famously with the American McGee’s Alice video game series(rest in peace, Asylum). Alice In Wonderland is a favorite of mine too, as a kid with a wild and vivid imagination (and a tendency to daydream) I loved the weird and nonsensical nature of it. And I haven’t watched Buffy before, but I liked the promise of it emanating a similar vibe! However, the execution of this was…so-so.

Firstly, because we didn’t spend as much time in Wonderland as I’d hoped (Allison got exiled, so there’s only so far you can go really), the worldbuilding was mainly through exposition and not in a more organic way. That got pretty tedious, such as in the case of an entire chapter showing Maddi explaining mirror images of the three queens of Wonderland. Combined with it taking a while for the plot to kick off (Allison didn’t get poisoned until halfway through), the actual structure of the plot didn’t feel solid. I have heard in that regard though, the second book is stronger, and I hope it delivers! A Blade So Black is L.L. McKinney’s debut novel, hence some of the hiccups in storytelling and pacing (and she likely has a better understanding of the story’s structure in the second book because now she has some experience to go off of).

Most of the aforementioned plot revolves around a MacGuffin, too. I’ve never been a fan of those, although I don’t think anyone is considering the term’s existence, and it basically made up the plot for when the Black Knight didn’t have nearly enough on-page time. (Not that I’m really complaining though, I had a visceral reaction to the “pet names” he’d use on Alice! Creep. Miss me with that “kitten” shit, I thought Discord didn’t exist here.) (the creepiness was intentional though, he was never paired with Alice thank god)

Secondly, I didn’t like the romance! Alice juggles a lot of crushes, as teens who get crushes do, and that’s perfectly normal and okay, but it results in this weird pseudo-love triangle existing? Like, she almost kisses Chess, but then spends the entire book thinking about Hatta. At least pick somebody, damnit! (And she had a crush on Xelon, the knight from the white queen’s kingdom, which I thought would culminate to something but nope. Xelon got paired with the princess. Which wasn’t totally surprising, I’ll admit, but I just wish they had more time together. They were kinda cute.) But also, Hatta and Alice have a mentor-student dynamic (which seemed to be weirder to a Goodreads reviewer who was also a Buffy fan and made some connections with the characters in the show?). While they’re the same age appearance-wise, Wonderlandians are semi-immortal, and I don’t know how the aging process works at all for them so it…makes this a little weird? It can’t be just me thinking that.

Anyhow! So what are some things I did like about it, though? Well. I did like Alice’s balance of badassry and vulnerability. She definitely struggled with the latter, but she had some solid moments of dealing with her own grief surrounding her father’s death, and throughout it showed her struggling with the pressure and stress of her circumstances. Not many black female protagonists get to have that in a novel, or in any media, really! I appreciated that detail.

I wish the side characters could’ve been more developed. Being that the plot only kicked off halfway through, a third in was when most of them were introduced, so the time we had with them was limited towards the end. I really wanted to enjoy the Wonderland group’s antics and adventures, even if the cast fell under certain archetypes. But alas :(

The real-life and Wonderland stuff felt a little unbalanced in their time, too. There were important social justice issues brought up in the real-life parts(racism, police brutality), although they were only touched on and the story never went in-depth about them. Wonderland also felt pretty empty a lot of the time, mostly due to it literally being just that because of Hatta’s confines to travel within, but another part the worldbuilding.

It wasn’t a bad read, but I was still left with mixed feelings on it.

Book rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️/5 stars. Finished 06/06/23.

(Book content/trigger warnings: Violence+blood, grief, death of a parent(off-page), racism and police brutality(mentioned), child death(mentioned), mild body horror.)

-Paz, signing off!

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