Romans when the bushes start speaking Germanic
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trying to find an old fanfic someone you followed on tumblr 5 years ago wrote only to find out their entire blog was deleted and barely any trace of it remains feels like how citizens of alexandria must have felt in 48BCE
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"The North Hertfordshire museum will now refer to the emperor Elagabalus with female pronouns.
Museum policy states the pronouns used in the displays will be those ‘the individual in question might have used themselves’ or whatever pronoun ‘in retrospect, is appropriate’."
source 1
source 2
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🔪🔪🔪
Happy Ides of March!
Send a “Senatine” to a Co-Conspirator you love today!
(I’m not super active on tumblr, please follow me on Instagram or twitter)
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There lived a certain man, a proconsul of Gaul
He was lean and sharp and his head was almost bald
Most people looked at him with envy and awe
But to Cato, he thought himself above the law
He had conquered Gaul and asked the Senate
For a triumph through their town
And to run for consul - he could win it
But they said "Stand down."
Ra ra Julie C., Nicomedes' teenage fling
There was a man who couldn't let go
Ra ra Julie C., really wanted to be king
It was a shame how he stole the show
He crossed the Rubicon, invaded his own home
But the Pompeians had already fled from Rome
With hardly any fights he captured Italy
Though Spain and Greece didn't come so easily
He got nearly slaughtered by Dyrrhachium
And the next four years of strife
But he won and had the Senate make him
Dictator for life
Ra ra Julie C., Cleopatra's Roman fling
There was a man who couldn't let go
Ra ra Julie C., really wanted to be king
It was a shame how he stole the show
But as his bogus elections and his hunger for power
Became known to more and more people
The conspiracy to assassinate
This man became bigger and bigger
"This Caesar's gotta go," declared his enemies
But a new war loomed and he'd soon go overseas
No doubt this dictator was difficult to harm
And within Rome's walls, they couldn't carry arms
Then they thought, a meeting of the Senate
Fit just right, for on the Ides
He would be alone for just a minute
And Caesar would die
Ra ra Julie C., every Roman woman's fling
They had him cornered, took out their knives
Ra ra Julie C., really wanted to be king
He grabbed a pen and fought for his life
Ra ra Julie C., emperor foreshadowing
They didn't quit, they wanted his head
Ra ra Julie C., Brutus jabbed his ding-a-ling
And so they stabbed him till he was dead
Oh, those Romans…
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