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the-royal-teacup · 1 year

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Teacup needs a rant…

This is a personal rant, so feel free to skip it if that’s not why you’re here!

So, you may or may not remember a few months back that I blogged about having a very toxic family member who is exhausting to deal with and who has done some extremely horrible and sometimes horrific things to my family and that a few months ago he had started again, rearing his head and trying to stir things up! Well, it got worse…

A bit of context, my mum was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Follicular Lymphoma in March of 2021. It’s classed as a slow growing cancer, one that they don’t treat, until it progresses, they put you on what they call ‘watch and wait’ which means you see a doctor every 3-4 months, have bloods done,a physical and CT scans to see if it’s progressing, seeing as it’s to do with your lymph nodes and unless you get physical symptoms they don’t treat it until this point because it wouldn’t work as well if it comes back, which with this type of cancer it isn’t curable and it’s something my mum will have for the rest of her life. And I know, it sounds crazy right? A cancer that they don’t treat straight away? But, truly, look it up. We knew nothing about it, until my mum was diagnosed and it still to this day it still sometimes blows my mind that my mum has cancer and we just have to wait until it gets worse to treat it. It may never get to the point, we hope it doesn’t, but you just have to carry on and just live your life, being grateful and thankful that it hasn’t progressed and she doesn’t need treatment yet.

Now that you have a bit of background, here’s where the shitty toxic family member comes in and why I spent some of today very angry…

We recently figured out that he had been going around saying he didn’t believe my mum had cancer, because she wasn’t having treatment and that she was lying about having said cancer. This coming from the man that has actual lied about having cancer at least three times that I know of, yes, that is the type of person he is!

Now, my mum confronted him, but not by accusing him straight out because with people as toxic as this shit head and knowing his temper, you just don’t confront him head on. So, instead she just said that some twat had been going around saying she didn’t have cancer and what would you know? He gave himself away that it was him. His reply? ‘Let’s get this straight, I was talking to one of your closest friends and they said they didn’t believe you had cancer’ that was the first reply, blaming it on someone else a supposed ‘friend’, this is one of his go too strategies, it’s always someone else’s fault and there’s always someone else to blame; it’s never him.

Then he wanted to know who had told us it was him that had said anything, because he wasn’t going to say who had said it to him, until we said who had told us! 🙄 Pathetic, right? And a man that knows he is caught red bloody handed for being the lying piece of shit that he is. It then changed to, it wasn’t that close of a friend and then that he’d just ‘bumped’ into them, whilst he was delivering on his job one day! 🙄 Just what liars do, they dig and dig, changing the lie and hoping you believe them.

Then, and get this, once he thinks he’s got you believing his lies he tells my mum ‘I love you (her name) and I want you to believe that. I will do anything I can to help you. I want to help you. You have to believe me (her name again)’. This man wouldn’t know love if it slapped him in the face, he just thinks love and sorry make up for everything; they’re just words to him and mean nothing.

I have no idea how such a disgusting human being came from my grandma and grandad, because my grandparents were the most genuine, loving, loyal, caring and giving people you could ever meet and yet they created this absolute waste of a human. It boggles my mind it really does!

Anyway, suffice to say, Teacup has a stinking great headache from getting so mad! We have once again told him to leave us alone, but like the cockroach with too many lives, he always rears his ugly head one way or another!

If you made it this far, thank you for reading my much needed rant, I appreciate it! And if you’re dealing/have dealt with a toxic family member, I feel for you, I truly do. ♥️

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gendercensus · 3 years

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On fae/faer pronouns and cultural appropriation

HOW IT STARTED

I had a handful, a very small handful but more than two, responses in the Gender Census feedback box telling me that fae/faer pronouns are appropriative. The reasons didn’t always agree, and the culture that was being appropriated wasn’t always the same, but here’s a selection of quotes:

“Fae pronouns are cultural appropriation and are harmful to use“ - UK, age 11-15

“I’m not a person who practices pagan holidays but, my understanding is that pronouns like fae/faeself are harmful because the fae are real to pagans and is like using Jesus/jesuself as pronouns“ - UK, age 11-15

“I know you've probably heard this a million times, so has everyone on the internet, but the ''mere existence''of the fae pronoun feels really uncomfortable for some of us. I'm personally not against neopronouns like xe/xim, er/em and the like, I am a pagan but apart from the, imo most important, reasoning of that pronoun being immensely disrespectful, I worry as an nb about people who banalize the usage of pronouns ''for fun'', and I'm quoting what some people have told me.“ - Spain, 16-20

“I don't agree with fae/deity pronouns just from a pagan perspective it's very disrespectful to the cultures they come from. Like Fae are a legit thing in many cultures and they hate with a fiery passion mortal humans calling themselves Fae to the point of harming/cursing the people who do it“ - USA, age 16-20

“only celtic people can use far/ faers otherwise it’s cultural appropriation, many celts have said this and told me this“ - USA, age 16-20

So that’s:

❓ Someone who doesn’t say whether they’re pagan or Celtic.

❌ Someone who definitely isn’t pagan.

✅ Someone who is pagan.

❓ Someone who doesn’t say whether they’re pagan or Celtic.

So, just to disclose some bias up-front, I am English so I’m not Celtic, but I do live in Wales so I am surrounded by Celts. The bit of Wales that I live in is so beautiful in such a way that when my French friend came to visit me she described it as féerique - like an enchanting, magical land, literally “fairylike” or thereabouts. Coincidentally I have also considered myself mostly pagan for over half of my life, and I can’t definitively claim whether or not the Fae are “part of paganism” because paganism is so diverse and pick’n’mix that it just doesn’t work that way.

To me the idea that fae/faer pronouns would be offensive or culturally appropriative sounds absurd. But also, I am powered by curiosity, and have been wrong enough times in my life that I wanted to approach this in a neutral way with an open mind. Perhaps what I find out can be helpful to some people.

So since we only have information from one person who is definitely directly affected by any cultural appropriation that may be happening, the first thing I wanted to do was get some information from ideally a large number of people who are in the cultures being appropriated, and see what they think.

WHAT I DID

First of all I put some polls up on Twitter and Mastodon. [Edit: Note that this post has been updated with results from closed polls.]

I specified that I wanted to hear from nonbinary Celts and pagans, just so that the voters would be familiar with fae/faer pronouns. I asked the questions in a neutral way, i.e. “How do you feel about...” with “good/neutral/bad” answer options, instead of something more leading like “Is this a load of rubbish?” or “are you super offended?” with “yes/no” options. I provided a “see results” option, so that the poll results wouldn’t be skewed as much by random people clicking any old answer to see the results. And I invited voters to express their opinions in replies.

Question #1: Nonbinary people of Celtic descent (Ireland, Scotland, Wales, Cornwall, the Isle of Man, and Brittany), how do you feel about non-Celtic people using the neopronoun set fae/faer? [ It's good / No strong feelings/other / It's bad ]

Question #2: Nonbinary pagans, how do you feel about non-pagans using the neopronoun set fae/faer? [ It's good / No strong feelings/other / It's bad ]

The Twitter polls got over 1,100 responses each, and the Mastodon polls got over 140 responses each. With a little bit of spreadsheetery I removed the “N/A” responses to reverse engineer the number of people voting for each option, combined those numbers, and recalculated percentages.

Obviously this approach is not in the least scientific, but thankfully the results were unambiguous enough and the samples were big enough that I feel comfortable drawing conclusions.

Celts on fae/faer pronouns being used by non-Celts (561 voters):

It's good - 42.5%

No strong feelings/other - 44.0%

It's bad - 13.5%

Pagans on fae/faer pronouns being used by non-pagans (468 voters):

It's good - 47.2%

No strong feelings/other - 39.5%

It's bad - 13.3%

Here’s how that looks as a graph:

The limitations of polls on these platforms means that we have no way to distinguish between people who have more complicated views (”other”) and people who have “no strong feelings”, so we can’t really draw conclusions there. If we stick to just the pure positive and pure negative:

Celts were over three times as likely to feel positive about non-Celts using fae/faer pronouns than they were to feel negative.

Pagans were over three and a half times as likely to feel positive about non-pagans using fae/faer pronouns than they were to feel negative.

So Celts and pagans are way more likely to feel actively good about someone’s fae/faer pronouns, even when that person is not a Celt/pagan. That’s some strong evidence against the idea that fae/faer pronouns are appropriative, right there.

CORRECTIONS

To be clear, I haven’t done any research about the roots of fae/faer or the origins of the Fae and related beings, but my goal here was to get a sense of what Celts and pagans think and feel, rather than what an historian or anthropologist would say.

On the anti side, here were the replies that suggested fae/faer either is or might be inappropriate:

“I only worry that not everyone understands the origin of the word outside of modernized ideas of fairies.“ - pagan

“As a vaguely spiritual Whatever (Ireland), I think a mortal using "fae" as a pronoun/to refer to themselves is asking for a malicious and inventive fairy curse (on them, their families and possibly anyone in their vicinity, going by the traditions). I have not heard of this term before, so this is an immediate reaction from no background bar my cultural knowledge of sidhe/fae/term as culturally appropriate. My general approach is people can identify themselves as they want.“ - Celtic

So we’ve got a pagan who’s wary that people who use fae/faer (and people in general) might not have a fully fleshed out idea of the Fae. And we’ve got a Celt who doesn’t mind people using fae/faer personally, but based on what they know of the Fae they wouldn’t be surprised if the Fae got mad about it. No outright opposition, but a little concern.

There were not a lot of replies on the pro side, but not because people weren’t into it, judging by the votes. There were a lot of “it’s more complicated than that” replies, many of which repeated others, so quotes won’t really work. Here’s a summary of the Celtic bits:

“Fae” is not a Celtic word, and Celts don’t use it. It is French, or Anglo-French.

“Fae” can refer to any number of stories/legends from a wide variety of cultures in Europe, not one cohesive concept.

There are many legends about fairy-like beings in Celtic mythologies, and there are many, many different names for them.

The Celts are not a monolith, they’re a broad selection of cultures with various languages and various mythologies.

And the pagan bits:

Paganism is not closed or exclusive in any way. It might actually be more open than anything else, as “pagan” is a sort of umbrella term for non-mainstream religions in some contexts. A closed culture would be a prerequisite for something to be considered “appropriated” from paganism.

From my own experience, pagans may or may not believe in the Fae, and within that group believers may or may not consider the Fae to be sacred and/or worthy of great respect. (I’ve certainly never met a pagan who worshipped the Fae, though I don’t doubt that some do.)

And then we get into the accusations. 🍿

“this issue wasn’t started by Celtic groups or by people who know much about Celtic fae. It was started primarily by anti-neopronoun exclusionist pagans on TikTok.“

“[I’m] literally Scottish [...] and it’s not appropriative in the least and honestly to suggest as such is massively invalidating towards actual acts of cultural appropriation and is therefore racist. Feel like if this was actually brought up it was either by some people who seriously got their wires crossed or people who are just concern trolling and trying to make fun of both neo-pronouns and of the concept of cultural appropriation and stir the pot in the process.“

“It wouldn't be the first time bigots falsly claim “it's appropriative from X marginalized group" to harass people they don't like, like they did with aspec people when they claimed "aspec" was stolen from autistic language (which was false, as many autistics said)“

“It's been a discussion in pagan circles recently ... People were very quick to use the discussion as an excuse to shit on nonbinary people.“

“I think it would be apropos to note that the word "faerie/fairy" has been a synonym for various queer identities for decades, too. The Radical Faeries are a good example.“ (So if anyone has the right to [re]claim it...)

A little healthy skepticism is often wise in online LGBTQ+ “discourse”, and some of these people are making some very strong claims, for which I’d love to see some evidence/sources/context. Some of it certainly sounds plausible.

HOW DID IT START?

I had a look on Twitter and the earliest claim I can find that fae/faer pronouns are cultural appropriation is from 18th February 2020, almost exactly one year ago today. Again, tweets are not the best medium for this, there was very little in the way of nuance or context. If anyone can find an older claim from Twitter or Tumblr or anywhere else online, please do send it my way.

I have no idea how to navigate TikTok because I’m a nonbinosaur. (I’m 34.) I did find some videos of teens and young adults apparently earnestly asserting that they were Celtic or pagan and the use of fae/faer pronouns was offensive, but the videos were very brief and provided nothing in the way of nuance or context. For example:

This one from October 2020 with 29k ❤️s, by someone who I assume is USian based on the word “mom”?

This one from December 2020, that says “I am pagan and i find it rather disrespectful. It’s like using god/godr or jesus/jesusr.” That’s probably what inspired the feedback box comment above that refers to hypothetical jesus/jesusr pronouns.

If anyone is able to find a particularly old or influential TikTok video about fae/faer pronouns being appropriative I’d really appreciate it, especially if it’s from a different age group or from not-the-USA, to give us a feel for how universal this is.

For context, fae pronouns were mentioned in the very first Gender Census back in May 2013, though you’ll have to take my word for it as the individual responses are not currently public. The word “fae” was mentioned in the pronoun question’s “other” textbox, and no other forms in the set were entered so we have no way of knowing for sure what that person’s full pronoun set actually is. This means the set may have been around for longer. The Nonbinary Wiki says that the pronoun set was created in October 2013, as “fae/vaer”, later than the first entry in the Gender Census, so I’ll be editing that wiki page later! If anyone has any examples of fae/faer pronouns in use before 2013 I would also be very interested to see that.

IN SUMMARY

Obviously I can’t speak for everyone, as the Twitter polls are not super scientific and they only surveyed a selection of Celts and pagans within a few degrees of separation of the Gender Census Twitter and Mastodon accounts, but I can certainly report on what I found.

For a more conclusive result, we’d need to take into account various demographics such as age, culture, location, religion, race/heritage, etc.

As far as I can tell based on fairly small samples of over 400 people per group, a minority of about 13% of Celtic and/or pagan people felt that use of fae/faer pronouns is appropriative.

A much higher number of people per group felt positive about people who are not Celts or pagans using fae/faer pronouns. The predominant view was:

It can’t be cultural appropriation from Celtic cultures because fairy-like beings are not unique to Celtic cultures and Celtic cultures don’t call them Fae.

It can’t be cultural appropriation from pagan cultures because paganism is not “closed” or exclusive in any way, it’s too broad and open.

If your experience of your gender(s) or lack thereof isn’t described or encompassed by the gender binary of “male OR female”, please do click here to take the Gender Census 2021 - it’s international and it closes no earlier than 10th March 2021!

#fae/faer #pronouns #neopronouns #cultural appropriation

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nat-20s · 3 years

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Part 4 of Wonderful! Au! This one isn’t an episode! And It’s not funny! It does, however, provide the context around Part 3! Also, Jon signs in this one, and sign languages have their own grammar and structure, but I display his signs translated into English and denote them with <> instead of “”. Here goes!

~*~

When, two days ago, Jon woke up gasping at 3 am, Martin didn’t think anything of it. Their nightmares were much like their chronic headaches: sometimes occurring daily, sometimes going weeks in without showing up. They were uncomfortable, surely, and sometimes had lingering effects, but there was a routine to them that took away much of their sting.

When he then throws off the covers, grabs the pack of cigarettes that only gets touched maybe three times a year, and makes a beeline for their balcony, Martin realizes that something worse is going on. Dread starting to settle in his stomach, he attempts to stave it off through action. He grabs the comforter and puts on a pair of slippers, going to accompany Jon. The early morning spring air is bracing enough to someone like himself, who, barring a certain deeply unpleasant year, had always run hot, it must be awful for the heat sink that is Jon. Sure enough, he finds Jon shifting on his feet, trying not to shiver too much as he’s handling the lighter.

Getting closer, while still allowing Jon breathing room, he offers over the blanket with a gentle smile and gentler words “Wanna talk about it?”

Jon doesn’t take the blanket. Jon doesn’t even look at him. “Talking to you has often been the problem, so no, thank you.”

Oof. Instinct tells him to react with a matching tone, to jab right back. That instinct is one that he’s long learned to ignore. Instead, he wraps the blanket around his own shoulders and replies with a certain level of blitheness, “Huh. Probably shouldn’t have married me then.”

Jon’s shoulders slump, and the harsh lines of his features soften. He still, however, won’t look at Martin. “Sorry, that was...a poor way of phrasing things. Sometimes I just think..”

There’s a silence between them for a few seconds as Martin waits for him to expand on the thought. When he doesn’t, Martin prompts, “Yes?”

Jon sighs with all of himself, before taking a drag of his cigarette. “Four years ago. If you hadn’t been there, I think I would’ve gone through with it. I’m glad for the life we got to build afterwards, but. Sometimes it feels as though I’m being rewarded for failure. Or perhaps, more accurately, for compliance.”

Four years ago. Four years ago exactly. The date dawns on Martin, simultaneously the worst day of their lives, and the day of their freedom from the fears. The realization makes him understand why Jon’s treading the ruts of a worn out argument, a old ache. These days, Martin doesn’t have much to say on the matter. He thinks the second Fucking Jonah Magnus opened the door, and that it was Fucking Jonah Magnus who did it, they no longer had any right choices to make. No matter what way they did the math, the outcome was always going to be terrible. However, when he wakes up warm, with their cat curled up at their feet and his husband curled into his side, he can regret the build up all he likes, but he can’t deny his joy at how it, eventually, all shook out. “Reward would imply intent, and I don’t think what we have now was orchestrated by anything other than ourselves. It’s not like the web promised us a summer wedding if we finished opening the rift.”

It’s too early to have the conversation. Jon seems to realize this at the same time that Martin does, because he snuffs out his cigarette on the railing, and says he’s going back to bed.

Four hours later, Jon leaves the apartment. He doesn’t say where he’s going, and Martin doesn’t ask. In the past, it would’ve been enough for his anxiety to spike, for the insidious thoughts of “this is it, he’s finally sick of me, always knew this would happen,” to circulate. He’s mostly able to stave off that way, able to come to the rational conclusion that this day was hard every year, and that they both needed space to process, that they weren’t even fighting, really. Mostly. He still has to keep himself busy to stave off the worst of it. The sardonic part of himself notes that their apartment’s always sparkling when they’re at their lowest, stress cleaning a habit the two of them share.

Jon gets home close to midnight, and doesn’t look at him as he falls asleep. On the couch. Maybe they’re fighting after all. Martin wishes someone had told him.

This morning, Martin wakes up cold for the first time in months. Blearily, he makes his way towards the kitchen, and finds Jon upright and scrolling on his phone. The bags under his eyes suggest he slept about as well as Martin. He looks up, at Martin, when he walks by, which is a marked improvement. Martin stops in his tracks, and he wants to think of something easy to say. He wants to offer tea or breakfast, he wants to give reassurances, he wants to remain steadfast in his conviction that saving their former world and ending up somewhere else was the best move, he want to smoothly open up discussion. Instead, he blurts out the question that’s been keeping him tossing and turning for the past several hours. “Are we okay?”

Jon opens his mouth, closes it, and lets out a frustrated huff through his nose. He raises his hand in a fist and nods with it. <Yes.>

Inanely, he asks, “Are you okay?,” which only gets him a flat stare before Jon signs <I’m getting some damn sleep.> and shoves past Martin to what is supposed to be their shared bed. Martin lets him, for now, but they’re going to clear out some of the tension this afternoon.

He makes the elective decision to record the episode by himself. He supposes he could send out a tweet telling their audience it’s an off week, but he wants to record it, both for himself and for Jon. After he’s done, he does a three knocks in rapid succession on the doorframe of the bedroom, a code they had established, god, back in the Prentiss days to let the other know it was them. Jon stirs under the covers, so he asks, “Can I come in?”

A hand rises up, giving the same nod as earlier. Before he walks in, however, he also asks, “Can I join you on the bed?”

<Yes.>

Martin crawls in next to him, and Jon immediately turns over to face him. Before he says anything, Jon signs <I love you.>

“I love you too. Hey, did..did you hear me recording?”

<No. You did an episode solo?>

“Yeah. Sort of figured you weren’t up for it.”

Jon shrugs and gives a tilt of his head that Martin reads as “Fair.” <What’s it about?>

Martin gives a shit-eating grin, the first smile hes given in the past two days. “It’s a surprise.”

Jon sticks out his tongue at him, which makes some of the weight on his lungs lift. “It’s also not what we need to discuss. What’s been going on, my love?”

Martin knew all that already, but, “There’s something else though, this time, isn’t there?”

Jon drops his eyes down to his hands, which he keeps resolutely still. With nothing but an earnest plea, Martin asks, “Why did you sleep on the couch? That’s not ‘same old, same old’.”

To his surprise, Jon comes in closer, only leaving enough room between them that he can still sign. <I love you. So much. Enough to terrify me, sometimes, but.>

“But?”

Involuntarily, Martin glances down to Jon’s abdomen. Despite his torso being covered, Martin knows the shape of the scar there, because there are times where he can still feel himself creating it. “I know how you feel. And it’s. It sucks, but I think it’s okay. As long as..as it’s not the only thing you see looking at me.”

Jon shakes his head, and gives an only slightly fragmented smile. <Not at all. Mostly I look at you and I see my favorite person in all of existence, literally.>

Martin relaxes into the mattress and runs his fingers through Jon’s hair. Pressing their foreheads together, he replies, “Ditto. Don’t tell The Duchess though, she’s the jealous type.”

That gets a proper laugh out of Jon, and Martin’s sure that they both know tomorrow is going to be better.

#wonderful! au #jonmartin #post canon #tma #jon sims #martin blackwood #THIS TOOK ME MENTALLY THREE DAYS I HATE WRITING THEM IN CONFLICT EVEN IF THE CONFLICT IS RELATIVELY GENTLE #also i didn't know!! what level they would be at after four years!! I think they're mostly okay but also!!! sometimes there's bad days!#anyway....they love each other...#part 5 will be fluffier i promise #also also should I transfer the main fics over to ao3 as well???

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brightwoods · 3 years

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Oh me? I’m just thinking about how even the characters who don’t have a problem with Alastair at this point (with the one exception of of Cordelia’s one comment to Thomas that was far tamer than things other characters say about him and that if it was going to be to Thomas couldn’t even be after Thomas threatened to throw him in the Thames right in front of her face at her wedding which was certainly worse) won’t say a word to defend him or even establish to people who do have a problem with him that they don’t

Like we’ve got

1. Cordelia who has never said a word about anything her friends have said about Alastair in front of him when they’ve been blatantly making snarky comments about him in front of her and she won’t even tell them not to say those things around her

She also never actually stood up for him in that one context with Thomas. She just asked if he just remembered that Alastair was her brother and at least she did say well he’s my brother and I love him but she still constantly excuses negative comments about him and never corrects them or says something about their comments in front of Alastair or even to him separately about it

Like it felt very well yeah he sucks but he’s my brother and I love him more than a defence

Also she never even said a simple that’s not the only good thing he’s done when Matthew eavesdropped on her private conversation with Alastair and then showed up with the backhanded comment like wow can you believe I happened to hear the only decent thing Alastair has ever said or done in his entire life when he very easily could have just talked about what he came there for instead of making comments at Alastair’s expense for his audience of only Cordelia who from what he’s seen doesn’t really seem to have a problem with any comments about Alastair in front of her

2. Thomas who used to annoy the hell out of his friends constantly going out of his way to interact with Alastair and ask about his feelings and treat him like a person but no longer did that after the Academy which yes is partly because of how his friends acted every time he mentioned Alastair or spoke to him but also Thomas is out here with feelings for Alastair and staying absolutely silent on the negative comments about him from other people instead of disagreeing or defending him or saying anything about not wanting to hear it

And then even worse, after he found out about the rumour he actively joined in and started talking shit about Alastair publicly whether Alastair was there or not... which yes, he was mad, I get that and it’s not like Alastair didn’t use to talk shit about him in front of other people

But the part that really gets me is that in the Sanctuary, Thomas never says anything to take those things back or to contradict any of the negative shit that’s the general consensus about him. He goes on about how much he wanted to hate Alastair and tried to and about how hot Alastair is and about how Alastair was always his secret and was his favourite part of his trip and he kisses him with no one around but he doesn’t really say anything that’s definitively about Alastair as a person beyond his physical appearance, sexuality, and availability

He basically said hey let’s pretend that no one else exists and Paris was the first time we met and make out so that we don’t have to think about any consequences or anyone outside or this room and then wondered why Alastair went oh your friends hate me, this isn’t possible once they were both free and all the evidence up to that point suggested that Thomas was still years past the point of sticking his neck out for Alastair in front of his friends no matter what his friends said and no matter how much he liked him

(He also did not say anything that we got to see after that about Alastair or to him in front of anyone else beyond trusting him in the fight with him and Christopher but then it was Thomas and other characters talking after with Alastair off on his own when Cordelia got there already again which we don’t have full context for but seems like Thomas went right back into his behaviour from before the sanctuary and before the rumour where he’s not saying things against Alastair and sure he’s tolerating him around other people but he’s also not saying anything in his favour or establishing that he doesn’t actively have a problem with Alastair and think he’s a horrible person anymore (which hopefully will come up with other characters later but at this point we have seen no hints of in what we saw of Thomas around other characters after the Sanctuary scene)

3. James who forgave Alastair and is willing to be civil and kind to him away from his friends and then just doesn’t really speak to or acknowledge him in front of his friends... and in front of other people tells Alastair that he had better treat Cordelia well or he won’t let him in their house or be civil to him anymore as it Alastair hadn’t been treating her well before that point and it was James’ warning that would inspire his behaviour around her

It’s also interesting how there’s silence or that in public but in private he will say that no one judges Alastair for his father’s drinking problem and will talk to him about Thomas and Matthew and giving them time

James seems to think Alastair deserves a chance but also has no intention of letting anyone else catch on that he thinks that even when Alastair tells him how he’s trying to make amends and he doesn’t know how to fix it if no one will let him apologize

Like sure James is over old things and is better than actively complaining about Alastair and being rude to him... but he also lets his friends say whatever they want about Alastair without ever saying a word about it, even when his friends are threatening his wife’s brother in front of her at their wedding

Sure, he has less obligation to speak up for Alastair, but also when he married into the family and then continues to listen to it constantly without even blinking at anything said about him is definitely worse than if he wasn’t married to Cordelia (and also I’m still including him even if he has a lot less obligation to speak up for him because he is still another person that’s like oh sure Alastair’s alright but don’t tell anyone I said that, I’m certainly not going to show that I’m on decent terms with him in front of anyone else)

4. And then obviously there was Charles who would never say anything remotely positive about him in front of anyone else and pretty much doesn’t acknowledge his existence around other people except for that time that he called him pathetic in front of Cordelia which yikes what a way to try to get an ex back, I wonder why it didn’t work...

5. And okay listen I know that Christopher is by no means the main issue at all and that he doesn’t really seem to have a problem with Alastair, but he very much follows along with what the other Merry Thieves think... like sure he won’t say anything against Alastair but he won’t say anything for him either or say anything about the constant comments the others make and it’s very clear in Chain of Iron that he entirely takes his cues for whether they’re tolerating and acknowledging Alastair or not from the other Merry Thieves where it’s like oh we have a problem with Alastair now... oh he got Thomas out and now Thomas is not ac to very threatening him so he must be alright to fight with okay...

Like Christopher doesn’t have an obligation to say anything about the way the others talk about him or anything when he doesn’t really have any ties to Alastair or reason to speak up but he is another character that’s like well I don’t have a problem with him but okay let’s all go along with this group mindset about him that at this point is just Matthew hating him so loudly that everyone goes oh okay we’re supposed to not like him and not stir the pot by saying anything to contradict that (and Thomas hating him just as loudly for a while before Christopher saw oh okay I think Thomas might be over it? which hopefully means Christopher’s going to be more likely to show that he’s willing to talk to Alastair and tolerate being around him during Chain of Thorns which it’s sad to say in this series is a high bar for how people treat Alastair even though that should be a the bar is on the floor moment)

And this post is way longer than I meant for it to get, but my point is that you know that Alastair thinks he still deserves having no one defend him or even show they’re okay enough with him to tolerate him when anyone else is around because at the Academy he didn’t defend anyone else and targeted other people that no one was standing up for just like he’s being targeted so it must be karma that even when he manages to claw his way up to people having a better opinion of him and not actively thinking that he deserves to be hated, those people still stay silent around and about him so that the only things said about him are still negative

And anyway if at least 4 characters don’t have an interaction with Alastair that isn’t negative and that isn’t when they’re alone with him or with just the Carstairs in Chain of Thorns then I am going to scream in rage for the rest of eternity

#It’s once again the time of night for I meant to go to bed and then got distracted typing about these characters for an hour oops!!!#No rereading for clarity or typos it is night time we don’t have standards at this hour #Alastair Carstairs #The Last Hours #TLH #Chain of Iron #CoI #The Shadowhunter Chronicles #TSC #Cassandra Clare #My Posts

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squirrel-moose-winchester · 3 years

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Officially

Title: Officially

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 1108

Square Filled: Impala

Summary: You and Dean are on a drive. When Dean takes the wheels and you fall asleep, he uses that time to clear his head and make an important decision. (Gosh, I such at summaries.)

Warning: Fluff

Written for @spndeanbingo (round 2)

Disclaimer: All mistakes are mine. Gif by @frodo-sam. Check out her page! She’s a content creator for all sorts of fandoms! I’m sure you will find something you like and more! :)

A/N: OH MAN! It has been so long since I’ve posted a fic! I’ve recently moved and did not have access to internet so I couldn’t post any fics (which were all on my laptop because I like to write them out on Word Docs before actually posting). But internet is back and I’ve been writing! Woohoo! I hope you guys like fluff because this is nothing but that! :) Love you all. Continue to stay vigilant and be safe!

Dean was sitting in the passenger seat, allowing you to take the reigns this time, much to your surprise. Soft rock played through the impala with the volume down low, acting only as added background sounds.

With your eyes on the road and Dean fast asleep, there was nothing but content. Just being like this almost felt normal, like there wasn’t monsters running around killing people or demons and angels trying to rid you and the Winchesters of the world. It was nice. It was a well accepted change for once.

Baby purred smoothly, the sound enough to lull Dean to sleep, but it was the sound of something else that stirred him awake. He didn’t move his body as his eyes fluttered open, casting sideways to look at you. Your eyes were fixated in front of you, attention to the road, fingers lightly drumming against the steering wheel while you sang along to whatever song was playing. Your voice was soft, smooth, welcomed. It was in that moment of simplicity that he was happy to be alive, happy to be here with you.

Aside from the big wins with saving the world and the people he cared about, it was also the small moments like these that made his heart unbearably full. If he could, he’d stay in this moment forever. Just you and him on the unwinding open road. Soon, Dean fell back asleep to the sound of your soothing voice.

A few hours later, you and Dean switched places, giving you a chance to get some shut eye. It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep. In fact, it took you all but forty seconds for you to knock out, hairline pressed against the window.

Taking a sudden hard right turn, your body shifted. “Shit,” Dean whispered, holding one arm to catch you, but he was a little too late, only able to slow and cushion your impending descent. Your head landed on Dean’s lap and your body quickly adjusted. You curled your body onto the seat with your feet bent and pressed against the door. Dean allowed his eyes to take in your form, a soft smile perching itself on his lips. God, did he wish you were his.

You were his best friend, the female adjacent to Cass. You had always been there for him, come through for him in a way that always surprised him. You were always on his side, no matter how stupid he was being. You were even bold enough to tell him like it is, giving him the tough love that was usually dished out by Sam. You’ve seen him at his best, darkest, and most vulnerable, and yet, you never looked at him any differently. He trusted you. You trusted him. Even Sam never second guessed you.

Finally reaching the bunker, Dean put the Impala in park however, he didn’t bother to move or wake you. He sat there in his beloved car listening to your soft intake of breaths. He didn’t want to ruin the moment, wanting nothing more than to spend more time with you. It was a little ridiculous considering he could have alone time with you in the bunker, but he just wanted to bask in this moment. He was in his favorite car with his favorite girl.

If life were different, and you two weren’t hunters, Dean could definitely live in this moment, although under much different context… If life were different, you’d be his girl, and the two of you would go out on drives just for the hell of it. Taking Baby and his baby out on the road just to spend some quality time. Damn, if life was different, he’d make sure this was how it would be. Not only that, but if life was different, both his parents would still be around, his grandparents too. Sam would come to visit on his breaks from Stanford, and you’d be wearing his ring on your finger. If life was different, Dean could have it all.

“Dean?” your groggy voice interrupted him from his thoughts. “We home?”

“Yeah, sorry. Didn’t want to wake you,” he half lied.

You stretched your arms and back, Dean’s eyes trailing over every curve. You were gorgeous. “What are you looking at?” you giggled. “Wanna help stretch a girl out?” you winked.

Fuck, he was lucky to have a best friend like you. Joking around, sleeping around, why didn’t he just make it all real? All he had to do was ask you to be his girlfriend. All he had to do was make it official.

“Actually, I wouldn’t mind helping to stretch my girl out,” he suggested.

“My girl?” you teased. “What you talking about?” the giggle that followed your question was music to his ears.

“You know what I’m talking about. You… being my girl. Officially.”

A wide grin spread across your face. “Whoa, easy there, Dean. Baby might get jealous,” you cooed, grazing your hand gently over Baby’s dashboard. “She’s been your only girl for a long time.”

Dean couldn’t help but chuckle. “I’m sure Baby wouldn’t mind. In fact, I think she really likes you. I mean, she let you drive her without complications.”

“Well, you know how it is. Us girls need to stick together.”

Dean smiled. “So what do you say?”

“I don’t know,” you sighed. “Baby, what do you think? Can you share Dean with me? I promise to take care of him just as good as you have.”

Miraculously, a popping noise came from inside the hood, the Impala cooling down. You laughed along with Dean, taking it as a sign.

“That’s my girl,” Dean crooned, kissing his steering wheel.

“In that case,” you started, crawling closer to Dean. “Looks like I’ve got the green pass,” you mumbled, lips barely grazing his.

Dean didn’t waste any time, pressing his lips towards yours. Inevitably, the kiss heated up quickly and you found yourself on Dean’s lap, straddling him. As layers of clothing started to come off, your ass pressed on the steering wheel engaging the horn. You and Dean separated with a gasp and labored breathing.

“Sorry, Baby. Y/N and I will take things inside,” his told the Impala, emerald orbs sparking with mischief and, what you would assume was, happiness.

“Yeah, sorry Baby,” you giggled, scrambling out of the car with Dean. Once out, Dean smacked your ass before you could take off running. You yelped, looking back at him playfully before dashing out of the garage and into the bunker.

“Thanks Baby,” Dean tapped the roof of the Impala before shutting the door and chasing after you.

A/N: Please feel free to reblog and leave some feedback. I would love to know your thoughts. Thank you for reading, and know that I appreciate all of you for taking the time to read the things that I write :)

#spndeanbingo #SPN Dean Bingo #spndeanbingo2020 #dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean winchester fan fiction #dean fan fiction #dean winchester fanfic #dean fanfic #dean winchester one shot #dean one shot #spn #supernatural #spn fan fiction #supernatural fan fiction #officially #squirrel-moose-winchester

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incorrectlumityquotes · 3 years

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FULL REVIEWS: “The First Day”

After Adventures in the Elements, I was all in on the lumity hype train. Granted I thought it was going to be like Little Witch Academia where they’ll do as could as they can without making it canon. I’m still afraid it’s going to be like Star vs The Forces of Evil where they make it canon in the last minute. I hope not. I’m so sick of that crap.

There have been shows where the main couple gets together and they stay together as the story continues. Parks and Recreation, Kim Possible, Tangled the Series, etc.

But you guys didn’t come here for a rant. You came for a review. Luz starts her first day at Hexside and it didn’t go the way I thought it would. Egg on my face, huh?

The cold open actually starts with an animation error showing Luz in her multicolored uniform. Hello? Spoilers, guys. According to The Owl House wikia they’ve fixed it in reruns, but I don’t know if that’s true.

Turns out the fabled “placement exam” is just impressing Principal Bump.

Forced to use all your skills and knowledge to impress one person in order to live your life’s dream? Where have I heard that before? Oh right, the WWE. Fuck the WWE.

The placement exam goes...exactly the way I thought it would.

Exactly.

Principal Bump’s response is also...exactly the way I thought it would be.

Good for you, Luz.

So Luz begins her first semester at Hexside. Amity congratulates her (more on that later) before meeting up with Willow and Gus. Several funny jokes later and Luz meets with Principal Bump to work out her schedule. Luz wants to do a little bit of everything (Red Mage style) but, thanks to the coven system, the school districts have a “Hocus Focus” policy. Everyone has to specialize in one track only.

This actually really scared me at the time because as a viewer it would be pretty lame to have nine tracks and only have us focus on one of them. The only other thing to do would be to keep switching characters based on which track we would want to focus on for that episode, but like typing that sentence, that seems like a lot of work for something simple.

Luckily we get a funny shot at Harry Potter before Principal Bump employs his “eenie meenie minie this one” policy. I’m starting to think someone on the crew is really likes Harry Potter and some else in the show thinks Harry Potter is really stupid.

Okay so he’s dead. We know that, right?

Bump picks potions for Luz because get out of my office. An inspector from the Emperor’s Coven is going to show up and he hopes to impress them enough for a donation to cover the costs of the damages from the previous episodes.

Luz tries to get into her potions class, but it’s not as exciting as the thought. And the idea of a potions coven also bothers me. Like if the coven system limits your magic does that mean people in the potions coven can’t do shit? It doesn’t take magic to mix shit together and stir. Hell we do that IRL. No magic required.

I choose you to die.

It’s made even worse when Willow and some moon-headed girl have a POKEMON BATTLE right outside her window. It’s made even double worse we we get a glimpse of Luz’s class schedule.

Potions for beginners

Potions in motion

Potions (again)

Still potions

Potions 'till you die

Potions after death

Good thing I’m not writing for the show because I would have added:

Potions, don’t you get it it’s all potions

Demonics JK more potions

Potions 2: The Quickening

How about potions on my hand

This drives Luz to try out that crystal ball she saw where she immediately gets caught by Principal Bump because magic I guess. Principal Bump becomes an odd number because he literally can’t even and ships Luz off to the detention track. That thing that educators do when a student needs extra attention but they don’t want to do the work.

The detention track seems terrible at first. The students aren’t allowed to do anything except wait until the day ends. But when the “teacher” falls asleep, one of the girls leads Luz to The Secret Room of Shortcuts. They use this secret network of magical back doors to peek into any and every class so they can learn whatever they want. Turns out Bump put them in the detention track for wanting to mix magics.

And there’s the part I expect to get flack for. I don’t like the detention track kids. It’s not that they’re bad. I just think they’re kinda lame and boring. Viney could be cool but the rest seem like afterthoughts. They’re not funny or interesting and they’re not on screen enough to make me care about them. They kinda bring down the episode for me. For a show that has so many creative characters I was really surprised on how not invested I was.

They get along well enough until Willow and Gus pull off the second laziest plot device in fiction: the misunderstanding. Yup, overhearing something without the proper context and taking it personally. It always works none of the time.

Meanwhile in the B (C?) plot, Bump is trying to use Amity to impress the inspector and it works too well. The inspector is actually a Greater Basilisk, a snake-like monster that eats magic from witches.

That’s not a face you wanna see everyday.

Everyone tries to fight it off but it’s a snake-like monster that eats magic from witches. Luz’s magic doesn’t come from her; it comes from nature so the basilisk can’t eat that.

Luz rallies the detention track kids to fight off the Basilisk, and I got pissed because the dog’s palm reading thing did nothing and was completely useless.

Bump gets pissed at the kids for mixing magic but Luz confronts him about it. Luz does something that angers boomers and uses logic to prove her case. Bump realizes he was wrong and just lets the kids study multiple tracks and I’m thinking how does that work? If one track has a full day’s schedule how they going to do double the work? Or do they just do half the work?

Pokemon and Sailor Moon? Someone’s 90s anime is showing.

Luz still can’t decide on a track so Bump let’s her do all of them. Which begs the question even further, how is Luz’s schedule going to look like? Big brain hurt. Just tell yourself it’s just a show; I should really just relax.

Meanwhile in the C(?)-plot, King sneaks into the school to eat trash, leftovers, and free food. Somehow he ends up as a substitute teacher of a class proving my point that people are basically stupid and will believe anything you tell them.

FINAL SCORE: 4 - Liked it.

I really wanted to give this episode a 3. I was just so not impressed by the detention track kids and I know that everyone else just loves them to pieces for the seven minutes maybe of screen time and the palm reading to defeat a Greater Basilisk. Whatever.

But I liked it because of the jokes, the jabs at Harry Potter and King’s C-plot was just funny enough to push it over that edge. And there’s also...you know....

#the owl house #my works #full review #full reviews

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kinetic-elaboration · 3 years

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September 17: 3x07 Day of the Dove

I am incredibly discombobulated today—usual weekend nocturnal shenanigans I guess! Anyway it’s somehow midnight. Gonna try to write up these note on the Classic episode The Day of the Dove in as efficient a manner as possible.

Hmm, a planet with wavy pink Fraggle plants. I like it already.

But where is Spock? Very suspicious.

I really appreciate Kirk giving a little speech to set up the overall question/issue for us. (I know he does this all the time with the Captain’s logs but this is out loud and so… more obviously expository.)

Oh no, it’s our old friends…the Klingons.

I will admit that this ONE TIME, the Klingon is being reasonable. Like, it is reasonable to think that Kirk and the Enterprise attacked his ship, given that his hip WAS attacked, and who else would it be?

Three years of peace between the Klingons and the Federation? That is inclusive of the show so all this tension must technically be “peace” and also implies there was something more like a direct war going on, like, right before Kirk got the captaincy.

Zoolander voice: What is this, a colony of the INVISIBLE?

“We have no devil. But we understand the habits of yours.”

No takers? No takers on the torture? No volunteers to be mercilessly tortured by the Klingons?

Star Trek Beyond could have had Kirk and Chekov bond over being brothers! I mean, to other people.

They’ll kill 100 hostages at the first sign of treachery. He does know there are only 400-some people on the ship right? Maybe you should pace yourself, Kang.

Kirk’s so badass he needs MULTIPLE guns trained on him just to use the phone.

Oh-ho secret message to Spock. Which version of the iPhone will be capable of doing THAT?

The Klingons are “suspended in transit” is an awfully nice way of saying they’re just dematerialized atoms in space. Philosophy major and/or Bones nightmare fuel.

How did Kang not see this coming, by the way? Like, he just says “I’m taking your ship now, me and my 6 men versus your 400-some men, and I’ll do this by simply declaring it to be so. Now let’s beam up to your ship, where I’ll be greatly outnumbered, and there are armed security guards all around me.” Guess he’s been reading The Secret!

WIFE AND SCIENCE OFFICER

Aka the most important part of this whole episode.

Kirk’s face is very ?????? You can have both????

It’s legitimately not even important for her to be the science officer tbqh. Like that is so gratuitous. That’s just in there to drive me insane.

"We're prisoners, somehow, after I demanded to come on the ship, assuming they'd just give it to me without any kind of fight. How DID this happen?”

Federation death camps lol—someone’s been watching Fox News.

I do kind of wonder… is this an actual rumor that goes around the Klingon homeworld or is it something that the alien entity put in her head specifically to make her angrier right now? I mean it really could be either.

I also appreciate this episode for being pretty much the only one to actually attempt to give the Klingons a reason for being as they are. The Romulans… maybe aren’t well-described, but they do have a sort of regalness to them, appropriate for being related to Vulcans, and you can kind of imagine that they are the way they are because they’re Vulcans without the intense self-control. Plus they’re literally only in 2 TOS eps and in the second, the Federation are the aggressors. But the Klingons show up a half-dozen times only to be depicted each time as just like Cartoonishly Bad, aggressive, violent, and selfish for basically no reason. And I mean, some people really are!! But TOS has so much nuance in other places, that it always seemed a little disappointing to me that the Klingons are really just like ‘well we’re just bad and we hate everyone and we really like killing I guess.” At least in this ep there’s a little more added to that: that there is poverty on their world, that they feel aggrieved, that they feel unprotected, that taking and conquering is how they look after themselves…

I think that’s later in the episode though.

He’s detaining them in the LOUNGE lol. With their favorite dishes available to them to eat. Absolutely barbarous conditions.

I can’t believe Chekov is hanging in the elevator with the cool kids. Like, one of these things really isn’t like the others.

Kang is officially sure of himself for someone currently imprisoned in the lounge, that most fearsome of Federation death camps.

Hmm, could the glittery light alien have taken over??

You know what, that's a lot of tasks for Johnson to do all by himself: search the whole ship, fix the engines, and free 400 people.

Sulu would love this: everyone gets a sword!!

“Bridge. I gotta show this to Sulu immediately.”

Klingons have maintained a dueling tradition. That’s interesting. Finally some characterization going on.

Spock is really living up to his logical nature today. Everyone else has gone off the emotional deep end and he’s like “have you considered this completely rational explanation that accounts for the actual, observed facts??”

Whoops Chekov is actually an only child. Scratch that previous Beyond headcanon. (Interesting that his dead brother does really resemble Sam though—killed on a research colony??)

Love that Sulu knows that about him though.

Oh, that’s a pretty schematic picture of the Enterprise. I want that on a t-shirt.

Lol the pan out to the armory, now filled with… swords!!

Do ALL of these men have a fetish for swords? Sulu and fencing, Spock displaying swords in his quarters, and Kirk in his San Francisco apartment, and Scotty salivating over this Scottish blade.

“Klingon units.”

Finally Sulu gets his sword! It’s what he deserves.

Love that the shiny light alien also has a fetish for swords.

Oh no, it’s our old adversary, an alien life force.

What is the alien’s purpose? Um, I’m pretty sure its purpose is to start shit.

“An appropriate choice of terms, Captain.” I don’t even remember what this is referring to but I think it’s pretty clear that Spock is enjoying himself during a crisis again.

Bones, being so dramatic. Were there atrocities? He’s talking about the Klingons as if they were literally hacking off limbs—it’s a few stab wounds here and there, chill.

Oooh, time to behave like military men—strong words. (But I thought it wasn’t the military?? @ S**** P****) (This might not even be my best argument, given the context of this episode, but I’m sticking with it.)

This is like a giant game of capture the flag.

AU that’s just about the Enterprise crew playing capture the flag with the Klingons.

Sulu in the background standing guard with his sword

Damn, turning on Spock with the slurs now!!

Spock was absolutely ready to kill him. Like he would 100% have taken him out with a blow to the head. And he’d been doing such a good job of not feeling the alien’s effects so far! Admittedly, that was a strong provocation though.

Honestly, I really like this scene. It’s uncomfortable and tense and you can really see how the alien is bringing out the worst possible influences of their respective races. And I liked how Spock was definitely full on pre-Reform Vulcan for a minute there. It was a more effective portrayal of what that might have looked like than All Our Yesterdays tbqh.

A result of… stress?

Kirk got himself out of it first. He’s so strong. He knows himself so well, he cannot be outsmarted by any alien.

“We’ve been taught to think in terms other than war.”

“The alien brings out the worst of us—patriotic drumbeating…even race hatred.”

He’s so sad; he can’t imagine thinking like that about Spock :(

Sulu in a Jeffries tube! A man of many talents. It’s okay bb, take credit for turning on the lights.

The alien must have been getting bored. The Klingons must have been doing too well, and the playing field needs to be leveled for maximum shit-stirring.

“Let’s find that alien.” That’s how I ALWAYS feel.

Oh, Kang, you’re so close—“What power supports our battle but thwarts our victory.” So, so close to getting it.

ALIEN DETECTED.

Spock takes his sword, of course.

“Jim.” Obligatory Jim moments hit differently when they’re not so obligatory.

“Jim—stop hitting my protégé. And put that sword down.”

Kirk looks so sad, picking Chekov up to carry him bridal style.

Also in addition to ‘race hatred’ I think we need to add ‘rape-y tendances’ to the bad stuff that the alien is inspiring here.

“A brief surge of racial bigotry. Most distasteful.” Spock winning for understatement of the year.

They're assuming the alien is trying to test out their relative powers but I think it just wants entertainment. I mean, doesn’t it look like a naughty little thing?

Mara’s outfit is… little shorts? Interesting. Usually not my style but she makes it work.

Spock doesn’t even look at Johnson as he falls lol. Another one bites the dust.

“It exists on the hate of others.”

What does this remind me of? Oh, the Vast of Night and the whole “aliens made us do every bad thing ever” conspiracy theory. At least this one makes more sense, in part because it is not quite so overwhelmingly broad!

All hostile attitudes must be eliminated, he says, and there's Mara right behind Kirk giving him a death stare lol.

Kang is so obviously posing. Google Earth, always taking pictures.

Only a few minutes before drifting forever in space becomes inevitable? Good thing Kirk works well under pressure.

“Well… do whatever you can, Scotty. You know the drill.” Doesn’t even bother giving real directions anymore. We’ve been in this scenario before.

“So we drift in space, with only hatred and bloodshed aboard.”

And the 392 people below just get to…live in Enterprise prison, I guess.

Star date: Armageddon. So dramatic!

I’m not even making that up; that’s an actual quote. Can you imagine being an Admiral listening to this?

“Stop the war now.” An actual line, really aired on television.

Spock wants to threaten the wife lol. That's the old pre-Reform Vulcan seeping through. Surak who?

Damn, Kang is cold. “Eh, she gets the concept of being killed in battle.” They’re gonna need marriage counseling after this.

“There is another way. Mutual trust and help.” Yes that’s my hero!!

“No one can guarantee the actions of another.” Can’t remember the context of this entirely anymore, but great line.

The entity is loving this—multi-person choreographed sword fight!!

"Those who hate and fight must stop themselves. otherwise it is not stopped.” Another baller line. Spock has a lot of deep thoughts today. And so does Kirk. And Kang.

Kirk tries to reason with the alien. Nice try.

“Shoo. Shoo, alien. Off the ship, go away.”

Omg that last moment—Kang slapping Kirk’s back way too hard, Spock’s completely ridiculous wide-eyed expression when he does, like some sort of combo of amusement and confusion, and then Sulu just passing on by in the background….

Then the alien just yeets itself into space. And that’s the end!

Always feels weird when there’s no wrap up on the bridge.

Also, what are they going to do with the Klingons? They have no ship. They really did come out of this a lot worse than Kirk and co. No ship, huge casualties—and no one to blame even, but the alien.

I feel like the alien messed up a little in killing so many Klingons. Like, it could have accomplished its purpose, angering the Klingons and turning them on Kirk, by attacking the ship a little less violently—you know they’d react to 5 deaths pretty much the same as 400, and then there would be many more people to fight forever and produce that sweet sweet anger!

Maybe the alien’s powers aren’t strong enough to influence 800 people though. Also it wants equal forces and 800 people wouldn’t fit on the Enterprise, one assumes. So it still makes sense.

That was, of course, an excellent episode. 100% agree with is classic status, even though the main things I remembered going in were the wife + science officer bit, and everyone laughing at the end in a really forced, fake way, in order to make the alien go away.

I thought the Klingons were a lot better/more interesting today than usual. First, I think Kang is a better character, or a better actor maybe, than the others; he has a certain way about him that is… more watchable, more sympathetic. And he’s always saying these really dramatic things that make it seem likely he writes patriotic Klingon war poetry in his off time. Also, including his wife made them seem more… not human obviously, but normal. Not just cardboard cut-out villains. And of course the actual lightly specific motivations I earlier mentioned helped too.

Also, the plotting was very good: it built up slowly but surely over time, so at first the alien’s influence wasn’t that obvious, and then it became more so, and then it became horrifically obvious and extreme. And then you had to re-evaluate earlier moments: was that the alien changing facts in their heads, or a real part of the animosity between humans and Klingons? And it wasn’t always clear, which I appreciated. The tension when the people were at their worst wasn’t overdone, like in that moment with Scotty, Spock, and Kirk—or even in Chekov’s assault on Mara, tbh. The various strategies of the different sides were very entertaining too; there was never a dull moment, and they fit in a lot of straight-up actions and twists into 50 minutes.

The possible threat was truly terrifying, also: stuck in a space ship, forever, unable to die, feeling the worst possible emotions all the time, besieged, angered, despairing, fighting a war that can’t be won, being injured and suffering only to recover and fight again, and it never stops… A perfect nightmare mixture of insanity and violence and pain. And the alien, in encouraging hatred and anger, doesn’t discriminate between sides: they turn on each other just as much as on the Klingons, breeding paranoia and infighting. For eternity.

The episode also felt much more strongly anti-war than I remember tbh. Like it was not subtle. Kirk literally says “stop the war” in so many words. He has a part in his speech where he talks about the possibility of other aliens out there, encouraging other wars. And while I do think “maybe the aliens are making us do it” is a cop out explanation, or would be if it were real, the scenario gave the show a lot of room to say, like, pretty ballsy things: to include “patriotic drum beating” along with “race hatred” in a list of corrupting feelings they were experiencing; to show how the same instincts that lead to warring also lead to sexual assault and the aforementioned ‘race hatred;” to reveal the true horror of an endless war by making the participants unkillable and sticking them in a singular space ship in the middle of nowhere; to imply that the combatants of war gain nothing from it, but outside or third-party entities will pull strings of their own design to profit from the conflict as long as possible; even to make an impassioned plea to camera to stop the endlessness of the conflict. Like I can’t even totally unpack this but it is a lot!

Finally, it was also a great Kirk episode, which of course is my most important factor. He’s smart; he’s strong; he’s so sure of himself and his values that he cannot be manipulated to mindless hatred, he represents the values of the Federation, and the show itself; he treats even his enemies with basic respect and humanity; and ultimately, he saves the day.

Okay I was not efficient in writing this up at all! It is very late!!

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #2021: fandom thoughts #star trek tos

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royallyprincesslilly · 4 years

Text

Title: Coffee In Your Cream {Headcanon} **

Steve Rogers x Reader

Warning: Mild Cursing, Moderate NSFW, Moderate SMUT

Words: 2k

***Loosley Edited/Proofread***

~~~~~~~~~~~

Steve Rogers is from an era where interracial relationships are not the norm. How could it be? It was the early nineteen hundreds.

Living and growing up in Brooklyn his worldwide view was never one dimensional. Thanks to being Captain America, that worldwide view was blown wide open. The first time he met you, you saved his ass.

He instantly thought that you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen in his entire life and at the time he’d been alive for well over ninety years. Point is, he’d seen a lot of women. You were gorgeous and even better you were working undercover with the Avengers which meant you were deadly.

From the day you met, you made him work for it. You danced around each other for months, both refusing to admit either of you had an attraction to the other. When neither of you could deny it any longer traditional Steve Rogers turned into a twenty-first-century man and no date was necessary for you to have him in the locker room shower, taking away his sexual innocence.

Since then the two of you have been inseparable. You went on missions together, trained together and the best part was that he let you do some downright naughty things to him. The two of you couldn’t have been happier and Steve couldn’t have loved you more.

“As you can see your majesty, we’re always training here,” Tony said as you circled the mat keeping an eye on Steve. Just because you always trained together, and you knew each of his moves didn’t mean he couldn’t beat you.

“Captain, look who stopped by.” Steve looked away from you to the two new additions beside Tony.

“Prince T’Challa—well King now.” Steve extended his hand to shake T’Challa’s. you watched the interaction between him and the two men. It seemed friendly.

They exchanged pleasantries for a few moments before Steve nodded you over. “Y/N, meet King T’Challa and Prince N'Jadaka of Wakanda.” Out of respect, you bowed your head to both of them as you shook their hand. You noticed how Prince N'Jadaka’s hand lingered with yours which had you looking at him. the look in his eyes was pure flirtatiousness.

“The pleasure is all mine, ma,” he chided with a lick of his lips that turned into a smile. You returned it.

“Dang Tony, if I knew you were recruiting more beautiful women for the team I might have joined up,” Prince N'Jadaka teased. You pinched your lips and tried to stifle the laugh. You could sense Steve’s uneasiness beside you. You loved when he was jealous.

“The Avengers could always use more people. Isn’t that right Steve?”

The way he looked at you it was clear to see his answer was definitely not.

“I hear the training sessions around here could raise to the level of my Dora,” T’Challa voiced.

“We don’t play around here,” Tony added.

“Do you think it’s a fair match against Captain America himself?” The way Prince N'Jadaka’s voice sounded he sounded serious. You wanted to laugh.

“Is it a fair match captain?” You walked back toward the mat and signaled for Steve to take his place.

“Oh great,” he said as he took his place across from you.

“Don’t hold back,” you warned giving him a stern look to say you meant it.

Before he nodded you charged to him going in for the kill. Quickly he evaded your onslaught of blows and turned around putting you in a chokehold—a loose chokehold. He was going easy. Annoyed you elbowed him in his gut and wrung his arm ready to flip him but he shoved you halfway across the mat. That was more like it, you thought.

The two of you continued to spar. You remained the one on the offense leaving Steve to block and deflect every attempt you made to put him on his fine ass. After almost ten minutes you were annoyed with the back and forth.

“If you’re tired we can take a draw,” Steve teased. He knew you hated draws.

“Why would I do that? I’m three moves away from dropping you.”

Steve laughed, a laugh that Prince N'Jadaka and T’Challa echoed.

“Little mama got a mouth on her. I like her.”

You ran across the mat to Steve as he ran to you he threw a punch and made an attempt to kick out. You knew the move and countered accordingly with a move Nat taught you. You jumped on him wrapping your legs around him as you’d done countless times before, all in a different context than now. You then flipped over him putting him in a choke to slam him to the mat landing on top of him pinning his hands to the mat.

“Oh! Daaaaaaaamn!” Locking eyes with Steve you smiled, he was already smiling.

“You love that move huh?”

“It has some elegance to it.” Steve bit his bottom lip and you could feel the beginning stirs of his arousal. Training and sparing matches usually led to hot shower sex and his body was more than ready

“Guess it wasn’t a fair fight,” you cockily said to Prince N'Jadaka and King T’Challa. Both men looked very amused and highly entertained.

Suddenly Steve flipped you over his head onto your back with him landing on to of you this time with your arms pinned to the mat.

“Awww.”

“Guess not,” Steve finished. You pinched your lips and mirrored the move he just did then stood and put your foot to his throat.

The men to the side of the mat clapped signaling you’d won the fight. Shaking his head Steve stood and gave you a smile indicating his ego was not bruised. By the way he bit his bottom lip it was safe to say his ego was not even touched, he had other things on his mind.

“Wow. What a fight. Remind me never to piss you off babygirl,” Prince N'Jadaka added. You smiled.

“It was nice meeting you two. I’m gonna hit the shower.” Steve approached your side and wrapped his arm around your waist resting it on your hip possessively.

“We’re gonna hit the shower.” You pinched your lips, possessive and jealous Steve was putting his foot down. The look on T’Challa and N'Jadaka’s face was pure and utter shock.

“Say what? Oh hell naw, really? You and—naw. You mean to tell me that this vanilla cone isn’t a full on square? Come on now, does he know what he’s doin ma’? If not—.”

You fought the laughter that threatened to spill out. if it did Steve would never forgive you. everything N'Jadaka was asking was what you’d thought those years ago before you got together. You had worries but he’d put those to rest.

“I’m good.”

“Yeah, she’s real good. You know what they say, vanilla and chocolate make a sundae.” Steve turned you and led you toward the door leaving T’Challa and N'Jadaka gaping at you.

“Wow, the vanilla and chocolate line? Damn, you even walk different cause of her. she gave you that swagger,” N'Jadaka shout after the two of you.

Before you walked out of the room you heard him say one more thing. “Damn, lost another one.”

Once you got to that shower possessive Steve was on full display. You loved jealous Steve, but you went weak for possessive Steve. As soon as he stepped into the shower behind you he was pressing you against the tiled wall and burying his face in your neck.

“It’s never a good idea to flirt in front of me.” You smiled.

“I wasn’t flirting.”

“Yes, you were, it might have been a little, but you still flirted. Did you like it?”

Steve pressed his hardness on your ass giving you a sneak peek at what was soon going to be buried inside of you. A soft moan escaped you.

“Of course not. I love you, Steve.”

“Looks like I’ll have to remind you just what it means to be mine.” Steve hoisted you up, holding you steady against him and keeping your body in a seated position. His strength always amazed you. You weren’t some dainty feather and still, he handled you as if you were a rag doll.

Without warning. Steve lowered you on his engorged heat inch by tantalizing inch. Once he was fully sheath both of you released a heavy sigh—a content sigh. Steve peppered kisses across your shoulder blades and shoulders before he trailed along your spine. Once he started moving you on his need, using your body to bring you both immeasurable pleasure you quickly melted

All that you could do was pant and moan his name with every poke of your cervix. He was buried so deep that you almost couldn’t take it. He’d confessed to you that the super serum made more than his muscles bigger. You’d been a very happy woman over the years.

Steve changed the angle of which he held you. You were not braced against the wall with him holding your legs as if you were a wheelbarrow. You knew he wasn’t going to take it easy on you. When his hips slammed into you the force of the thrust almost gave you whiplash.

“Shit.” It was said as a groan, one that was laced with anxiousness. You knew what was coming. Steve plowed into you setting a steady pace at first that quickly became erratic. Though erratic the power behind each of his strokes was clear. You didn’t bother to try to hold your orgasm back. It was no use.

As you came Steve groaned from the tight clench around him, but his thrusts didn’t slow. Your moans won out over the sound of the water beating down on both your bodies. Anyone who was walking by would easily hear you. Steve’s hips slowed to deliver slow, deep and powerful strokes that coaxed yet another orgasm from you.

“Y/N!” That was all he managed to get out before his release overpowered him. It felt like forever that he stood there filling you to capacity. Once he was spent he lowered you to your feet and slid to the shower floor trying to catch his breath.

Slowly you lowered yourself onto his still hard length moaning at the feel of him sliding into your well coated core.

“Jesus, thank god for Bruce’s super birth control. I’m sure that would have been the one to put a baby right here.” Steve gently rubbed your belly.

You snorted and laughed heartily. All he could muster was a toothy grin.

“You’re so silly.”

“But you love me, right?” You nodded as you kissed him.

“So much.”

You lazily bathed each other right there on the shower floor unable to find any strength left to stand and complete the tasks. Once the two of you were cleaned and dressed you made your way to the dining room where you knew everyone was gathered.

You got your food and sat down.

“From the sounds I heard coming from your rooms I guess he does know what he’s doing,” N'Jadaka uttered.

Embarrassment filled you. “Oh you heard them too? We always hear them. these two cannot keep their hands off each other,” Bucky teased.

“Shiiit, by the sounds I be hearing all the damn time Cap be killing Y/N.”

Everyone laughed loudly, everyone but you and Steve. While you buried your face in your hands Steve sat there pinching his lips.

“I’m surprised she can still walk,” Nat added.

“Oh my god, really Nat?”

“I’m surprised there aren’t at least six Steve Jrs, running around here,” Clint voiced.

“I think Cap is still determined to make it happen,” Sam finished.

“Wow, okay, everyone back off,” you warned.

They all raised their hands in defeat and continued eating their meals in comfortable and sociable silence.

#coffee in your cream headcanon #Steve Rogers #steve rogers headcanon #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x black reader #black fanfiction #steve rogers smut

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ryttu3k · 3 years

Text

Okay.

I’m gonna do it.

I’m gonna watch the Star Wars Holiday Special.

And we already have off-brand opening text. This is off to a great start!

I’m a minute and a half in and the sitcom-style openings have already killed me. Oh Mark you poor fucker.

“Anthony Daniels as C-3PO! Peter Mayhew as Chewbacca! R2-D2 as… R2-D2!”

Fuck the actors playing Chewie’s family apparently, no credits for them!

And let’s start off with this picture that isn’t even trying to be photorealistic. I mean you could have at least edited in some generic forest to the background or something. Made a model. Anything!

There are several minutes of cozy domesticity. Done completely in Shyriiwook. Kid is playing! Grandpa is grumpy! Mom is cooking! Mom wants Kid to take out the garbage! Its main saving grace is that there’s no laugh track!

Look out, kid, you’re balancing on a matte painting!!

Why would you have a tiny holographic circus in pseudo-BDSM gear?

Why wouldn’t you have a tiny holographic circus in pseudo-BDSM gear?

*covers Lumpy’s eyes*

This legitimately reads like, “Well, we decided to show off our [assorted crew member]’s [generic family member]’s amateur gymnastics and tumbling squad, so let’s put them in brightly coloured body suits and pretend they’re aliens.”

Well, they’re very brightly coloured, if nothing else!

Lumpy wants to keep playing but Malla wants him to dry the dishes! First the garbage, now this?! Inhumanity!! (Inwookieety?)

Listen I know Star Wars has its own visual identity when it comes to interface tech, so why does this look like it’s out of a parody of itself?

Mark I’m so fucking sorry. And we know how he feels about this particular low!

jfc his eyes are so wide it’s like he’s been dipping into Carrie’s stash XD;;

Bless his heart he’s trying his hardest but the script is............. not good.

Losing my shit at Malla trying to talk to a trader with an Imperial soldier in the background.

“Don’t say a word, ma’am, I know just why you’re calling! You’re wondering when that shaggy carpet you ordered will arrive at your home? Let me assure you, madam, it’s on its way! It’s being flown especially for you by a little old woman four planets away. She did it all by herself. In fact you might say she did it -” Obviously raised eyebrows - “BY HANd. SOLO.”

STIR WHIP STIR WHIP WHIP WHIP STIR

The cooking scene is straight up ridiculous and is, so far, my favourite scene of the show. It’s completely unhinged on its own, but it’s also bookended before it by a scene with Vader and an Imperial officer being menacing, and goes straight into Han and Chewie trying to evade TIE fighters, and the mood whiplash is impeccable.

Oh noes! An Imperial blockade around the planet! However will Chewie get home for Life Day!

Apparently they have something called a Mind Evaporator. Which sounds... ominous.

“Why all the long hairy faces?”

Oh my god the trader guy brought porn for Itchy. To use with the... the Mind Evaporator. “It’s kind of... hard to explain. It’s kind of... wow. D’you know what I mean? Happy Life Day! ...and I do mean Happy Life Day!”

what the fuck

Is this why he’s called Itchy

What the fuck am I watching XD

I mean the song is very nice but the context... the context...

Man there’s just something... really off about Leia XD;;

Han made it to the planet, but oh noes! Imperials!

My god this is almost cringey. The trader/rebel is trying so hard to be suave and also sell his shit without letting on that he’s a rebel... and is now distracting an Imperial soldier with holographic Jefferson Starship.

Actually this song kinda slaps...

Just another day on a planet occupied by hostile Imperialism! *laugh track*

Wow, this is the animation? That style... XD

This thing is meant to be menacing.

Boba Fett to the rescue! ...wait, what?

So, uh, Chewie and the droids are teaming up with Boba Fett to find the cure to an infected talisman that only affects humans and forces a sleeping sickness on them, meaning they have to be tied up upside down to keep the blood rushing to their head. I repeat, wait, what?

Oh okay he’s working for Vader and trying to earn their trust. That works much better XD

At this point Lumpy yells in dismay over the cartoon he’s apparently watching about his actual real-ass dad and the Imperial comes over to investigate! Oh noes!

No it’s okay he pulls up some random game and the guy is like ‘oh okay you just suck at games’ and wanders off again. Back to Lumpy watching a cartoon about his actual real-ass dad because that’s something that just happens in this universe apparently.

Threepio casually reveals Fett’s plans and Fett is just like, “Welp, foiled again!” and jets off and like... that’s it. No problem.

Man the Imperials are just casually trashing Lumpy’s room that’s so rude. Just straight-out decapitated the stuffed bantha?? Rude??

Man bar staff have to deal with this shit all over the galaxy XD

Bea Arthur is singing to the Cantina song. That is all.

Chewie and Han arrive home, only to find a stormtrooper threatening Lumpy! Oh noes!

WILHELM SCREAM.

Aww, Han and Lumpy’s interactions are adorable. He’s all, “omg he’s got so big!” and teasing him over his voice starting to change XD

Oh god please don’t make me watch Wookiees make out... oh thank fuck it was just a hug XD

And suddenly they’re in robes and floating through space in a procession while a solemn version of the Throne Room theme plays and Threepio wishes everyone a Happy Life Day (”WAAAARGKJHJDSAASDFJLKWAHH!”).

Wow I don’t know about Threepio wishing they were truly alive so they could celebrate Life Day too XD;;

And here’s our trio! For some reason, Luke is back in his Tatooine outfit?

Listen there is something not quite right about Leia passionately talking about their love for one another despite their differences while clinging to Chewie’s arm and gazing adoringly at him XD

“This is the promise of the Tree of Life.”

The what of what? Because that was literally not mentioned at any point before that.

Oh god the song. Oh god I don’t know if I’m strong enough.

That note did not work with the music being played!!

So that happened.

#ry watches the star wars holiday special

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addictofsupernatural · 4 years

Text

Spidey Senses (pt. 5)

Peter Parker x reader

Summary: You and Peter get your costumes ready for the party, and Tony gives Peter some advice.

Word Count: 2779

Chapter 1 • Chapter 4 • Chapter 6

When Peter came into his room, he did not expect to find Ned. When he did, he knew he was in deep shit. He's bad at keeping secrets as it is. And now? Now how is he going to keep your secret identity from his best friend? He's obviously going to ask.

"You're the Spiderman."

"No, no I'm not! Ned, this isn't what you think."

"You just climbed the walls!"

"No I didn't."

"Oh my God this is the coolest thing ever!" His words were jumbled together. "You can stop a moving car!"

"Ned—"

"Are you an Avenger?!"

Peter tilted his head. "I mean, basically, yeah." He then snapped back to reality. "Ned, listen to me for a second. You cannot tell anybody about this."

"Yeah, yeah. Nobody... Okay I need to tell somebody about this."

"Ned!"

"Y/n should know! She's gonna flip dude. Wait, are you in a relationship with the Spidergirl?"

"What?! No." Peter quickly shook his head. "That's, that's weird. Don't say that."

"Wait wait wait, so who's Spidergirl?"

"I can't tell you that." Peter was silently panicking as he pressed his suit center, dropping it to the floor.

"Why not? I already know your secret, and I can't tell anybody. This will be just another secret." Something then clicked. "Oh my God, this means that you know who Spidergirl is! And she knows who you are! You two know each other, and if you won't tell me who it is then that means I know who it is."

"Ned—"

The two fell silent as you climbed through the window and landed the opposite direction from them. You then took off your mask. "Peter we need to talk. Tony just saw me today and—"

You stared at an almost naked Peter and a shocked Ned. Ned then opened his mouth in the shape of an O. "Ooohhh my God you're Spidergirl! That makes total sense on why Peter wouldn't want to say who you were."

"Uhm, wow. Okay. Well, what happened to you? Did you show him, or..." You asked Peter.

"I kind of just did the same as you." Peter nervously shrugged.

"You should get some clothes on." You forced your eyes away from his abs as he awkwardly nodded.

Aunt May then came in. "Peter, I was thinking we could go out for some Tai food—oh, hey y/n! So I take it Ned knows?"

"He just found out." You said sheepishly.

She giggled. "That explains Peter being naked."

You rubbed your neck. "Yeah..."

"Well, come and borrow some of my clothes. We're going out for Tai food."

You warmly smiled. "Thanks Aunt May."

"I'll do your makeup!" She excitedly said as you helplessly looked back to Peter, who gave you the same look, and the two of you left and closed the door.

"Your aunt knows?!"

"Yeah. It was a total accident."

Peter was filming in the hotel as you two did trick shots together. After a bit you stopped and Peter had laid down. He had his phone directly hovering over his face. "Peter be careful. You're honestly setting yourself up to hitting your face with your phone."

"What? No I'm not. Even if I did, I have super awesome reflexes. Don't worry."

It was as if karma hit him, because he wasn't paying attention to the phone and it slipped out of his hands, hitting him snack in the face. There was a pause, and even though this was a perfect time to laugh, you only asked quietly, "Are you okay?"

"Nn, yeah. That just really hurt my nose." He then saw that he had accidentally sent Aunt May the video instead of you when the phone fell. "Um, no! We aren't okay! We aren't okay!"

"Woah, what happened?" You got up from the chair and looked at Peter's phone, seeing the message that was sent to Aunt May. "Oohhh we're not okay!

Then, to both your horrors, she called.

Peter then snapped out of his memories and grabbed Ned's shoulders. "Listen Ned, you cannot tell anybody about this."

"Yeah. Don't worry, I can totally be your guy in the chair."

"The what?"

"The guy in the chair. Y'know, the one who tells you where to go and what to do. They're usually surrounded by a bunch of cool stuff."

"Ned, we don't need a guy in a chair."

He huffed. "We'll come back to it."

After a while, Peter was knocking his aunt's door. "May, are you done? We're hungry."

"Almost!" She called out.

You then came out in May's bell bottom and a zip up off the shoulder crop top. You had light eye makeup and some blush. "Wow." Ned said. "You look like girl."

You laughed and patted his cheek. "What did we say about wording?"

"I meant that you look good." He said as he swatted you away, giving you a goofy smile.

You looked at Peter and saw the red on his cheeks. Was it too revealing? "You, you look nice. Really nice."

Your face felt really hot. "Do you like it?"

"Yeah." He said in a breathless daze. "You look really pretty."

You did your best to calm yourself down. You felt like your face was on fire, and being around Peter had your spidey senses buzzing. He had that same buzzing feeling, and his face felt just as hot looking at you right now. Maybe becoming a man was making him see every girl this way. Yeah. This is normal.

You then told him about Tony, and sketched out some drawings of you and Peter later that night. The next day you and him sat outside of Del's, helping each other pick out which drawing to use. That's when Tony showed up.

"Hey kids. You two ready?" Then he saw your papers. "What are those?"

"Nosey as ever Tony. They're sketches of costumes."

"Can I see them?"

"Nope. Let's go!"

You and Peter met with a designer. You showed her the pictures you wanted, and the you and Peter communicated with the her about the details she wanted to alter. You both then got measured.

When you two left her office, Tony stood up from the waiting room. "What'll it be?"

You grinned. "That's a secret."

Two days later Tony picked you two up to get fitted. He went in with Peter to stir the pot that is you having a huge crush. "So kid, how's it going? Anything you wanna share to the class?"

"Uh, can I ask you something actually?"

"Shoot."

The designer then scolded Peter for moving. "Sorry." He cleared his throat. "Did you ever start seeing girls differently when growing up?"

"Yeah, every boy does. Of course you shouldn't follow in my lead about what to do on those feelings."

"Woah, no! I meant, like, girls you knew. Ones that you were close with."

Tony held back a smile and slowly walked around the room. "Once."

"And what happened?"

"Now I'm trying to figure out when the right time is to propose to her."

"Oh." He fell silent and awkwardly twitched, getting scolded again for moving. "I'm sorry."

"So you're having those feelings with y/n?" Peter turned to see Tony look at him in the eye. Peter then looked away.

"I don't know. I feel weird around her and she's so pretty now."

"Then what's the problem?"

"I like Liz! Like, really like her. So why do I feel like that with y/n?"

"Kid, think about who's always going to be there for you. Who'll never laugh at you unless they have the right to. Who's going to stand up for you instead of quietly watching you get picked on. Who's the girl who'll do that?"

"Well—"

"I want a name. Now."

"Y/n." He surprised himself by saying your name without thinking. "But I still have feelings for Liz."

"Yeah, but she wasn't the first person in your mind." He then paused and looked at Peter's costume. "Wow. Was that y/n's idea?"

He then felt embarrassed, shifting only to apologize again for moving. "Um, yeah."

"Then she's..." Peter gave him a sheepish smile. "Oh God. Really?"

"I thought it would be pretty funny. She said it'd be cute."

"Mm." He then walked out of the room and into the waiting room that you were in. "Interesting to know you're one of those fans."

You giggled. "I'm really not, but I thought the matching would be cute. Do you like it?"

He huffed. "I guess I'll just have to see you two wearing it together."

It was soon your turn to be fitted, and once you were done the lady brought in Peter to have the two of you next to each other. Peter was in a very nice looking Captain America suit. It was in the style of his 2014 suit, and he had a very nicely done shield, one that looked very close to the real thing. He wore no face mask, as you figured this was enough.

You wore a gender bent Iron Man suit. It was a nice and detailed skirt with lines like the suit, while the fitted crop top had the arc reactor design. She gave you fake metal arm sleeves with your hands being connected to fake blasters. You had a simple red eye mask with lines like your skirt.

You grinned at the mirror. You then excitedly turned to Peter and hugged him from the side. "You look awesome!"

"Why would you make him dress up as such a boring person?" Tony asked.

"Because he's the one making me to the party in the first place."

Peter's cheeks reddened. "It was also Ned."

"You were the one who was going to follow me into the girl's restroom for it though." You giggled, and Tony raised his eyebrows.

"That's taken out of context Mr. Stark!"

"Not really. Anyways, what do you think?" You spun around and smiled. Peter dumbly didn't say anything and only slightly shook his head. "What? Why are you being weird? It's not like we're brother and sister Peter."

"No, we're definitely not." He mumbled.

"Then you don't like it?" You frowned. "You know you can be honest. It's just a costume."

"No no! I do, I really do like it! It's just that it looks so awesome that I didn't know how to explain how much I love it."

You furrowed your eyebrows but also smiled. "You're being weird right now, but I'll just assume that it's cause of Tony."

"Thanks kid." He then stepped up to you as you turned to him. He looked you over, awkwardly saying, "You look nice."

"Thank you." You grinned and rocked on your feet.

You were then brought back home and offered Peter to watch TV with you in the apartment. He agreed, and you made the two of you PB&J's as he sat on the couch. You texted Ned to come over, watching TV while waiting. It was cold in your apartment, so you brought a blanket for the two of you. You brought yourself to his side and leaned on him.

"Woah, what are you doing?" Peter asked, sitting up.

"You're not cold?" You didn't see the harm in being close to him.

"Yeah, but..."

"Am I making you uncomfortable?" You asked, straightforward.

"What? No! Why would you think that?"

"Cause you've been weird since last night. My spidey sense could feel it. What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I've just been thinking."

He heard your small gasp and looked into your sad eyes. "About what? Our friendship?"

"I don't know. About my life and stuff..." This only worsened your fears. He saw that you looked even more hurt, but didn't get the chance to say anything before there was a knock at the door. "Wait, y/n—"

"I need to get that." You stood up with a blank face and went to your door. It was Ned, and you silently hugged him before he could say anything. "I'm so happy you're here right now Ned. You have no idea."

"Um, thanks? You know I still love your hugs, but I need context."

"I'll text you about it later. Anyways, come in!" Peter watched you with sad eyes as you took out snacks for Ned, happily engaging in conversation as if you weren't just sad right now.

"Hey, can I have some?" Peter attempted to say lightheartedly with a smile. You only nodded. He took a cookie and nervously nibbled on it. He then cleared his throat as the air had gotten thick for him. "So Ned, so you have your costume for this Saturday?"

"Yeah. I'm going as Mario. I got a cool velcro mustache and everything."

"Good for you Ned." You smiled again.

"What about your guy's costumes?! Let me see them!" You then took out your outfit hanging up in your room and plopped it on the couch nonchalantly. This was making Peter uneasy. "I'll be wearing it to that damn party."

You gritted your words out with a forced smile, but Ned was too busy fan girling over the costume to notice. Peter quietly slipped his hand in yours to gain your attention. You stared at your laced fingers, and squeezed gently before you pulled your hand back.

"Okay, guys," Ned said. "I was thinking that you two could use your powers to your advantage at the party."

The rest of the time together at your apartment felt like a building was laying over Peter. He tried to get closer to you, but you'd move away when you noticed. Once Ned went home, Peter figured that this was his chance. "I should probably go home too."

"Yeah." You began to fold your blanket, your back turned away from him.

Though he was close to just leaving he scrunched up his face worked up his courage, blurting out, "We need to talk about earlier."

"No we don't." You began to walk away to put the blanket back, but he took the blanket from you and set it down on the couch. "Hey!"

"Listen. It's not what you think. I've just been confused—"

"Peter, please. It's okay to feel differently towards someone. It's okay to not like someone anymore. I understand if you don't want to be friends anymore, just don't coddle me if you're going to leave." You voice cracked and you wanted to crumble.

"Y/n..." He stepped closer to you. "Why are you crying?" He said, almost in a whisper.

Your eyes were cloudy with tears. "Cause I'm not ready for you to leave me yet."

You then bursted into sobbing, and Peter hugged you tightly as you buried yourself in his chest. You two stood like that, with Peter holding onto you for dear life, until your tears stopped. "Y/n, I promise I'm not going to leave you. I never was."

You looked up at him with your puffy eyes. "No?"

"No. I was just wondering if I still like Liz."

"Oh." You said dumbly. "I feel really stupid now."

"No, your not stupid! Don't say that." He said cutely. "C'mon, let's go to your room." You then both sat down on the bed. You leaned on him, wrapping your arm around him as he brushed his fingers through your hair. "Honestly, I was kinda comparing you to Liz a lot."

You weakly laughed. "I bet I just embarrassed myself after crying for you, even though there was really no reason to."

Peter smiled. "I don't think Liz would ever like me enough to cry over me though."

"Mm. So do you still like her?" You felt it getting harder to keep your eyes open. Peter noticed and chuckled.

"This probably won't make any sense, but I think it would be easier if I still liked her."

"Nope. That doesn't make any sense, but I'll support no matter what. Don't worry."

"Hm. You always do."

You then fell asleep on Peter, and after a bit he called Aunt May to pick him up. When she got there, waiting for him outside, he covered you with a blanket first.

He stared at you, before mustering his strength to go over to you and kiss your cheek. You would never know, so it's okay right? No, that's not okay. Peter felt like an jerk. He shouldn't have done that. That's invading your trust. Damn.

Once he got home he texted Ned that he thinks he likes you, even though that's kind of crazy for him to realize. He then got a call from Ned, and answered. "Finally dude."

---

Tag List:

@flawlessapollo6 @them-cute-boys @lunawndrlnd @the-greatt-perhaps @babebenhardy @sofisofi1602 @smilexcaptainx @herondalism @coni-martina @youvebeenlizzed

#marvel peter parker #peter parker marvel #peter parker x you #peter parker #peter parker x reader #mcu peter parker #peter parker mcu #marvel fanfiction #marvel #mcu x reader #marvel mcu

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lambourngb · 4 years

Note

Ooooooh an update on the This Hard Love series ☺️☺️🧡🧡 ?

I have literally 3 more scenes to write to wrap this up- it’s so close but I’m also trying to finish my rough draft of my big bang by Wed night... so hopefully I can get this finished off next weekend. 🤞

Here’s the last scene I wrote:

****

“It’s been too long, what if she’s hurting him? Do we even know what the long term effects are on humans with alien mind control-”

Michael winced at Max’s annoyed glance, reminded again how little his brother thought of Kyle Valenti, past and present, before placing his hand on Kyle’s arm to attempt to calm him. Seated stiffly in one of the formal dining room chairs, knee to knee with Isobel, was Jim Valenti, currently caught in her mindspace as she examined his intentions. Candles were lit all around lending an otherworldly glow to the scene.

Meanwhile, Alex was in the kitchen on the phone to an electrician, while Max’s partner Jenna Cameron swept up the broken glass from the ceiling pod lights. The revelation that his boss was aware of who and what he was triggered what Michael called a ‘Max Special’.

“Hey remember Coach Collins?” Michael prodded Kyle.

Not taking his eyes off the scene in front of him, Kyle replied distractedly, “What?”

“You wanted to know about the long term effects on humans, I’m tryin’ to tell you. Isobel never attended gym class for a reason and Coach Collins is just fine.”

“Are you telling me your alien sister- wait, of course she would. She was also homecoming queen as a freshman.”

Michael squeezed Kyle’s arm in acknowledgment before letting go. “See? You’ve got nothin’ to worry about.”

“Unless your dad is planning to round us up,” Max put in quietly with crossed arms. The secret expanding to include three more people was still not sitting well, even though Max had been somewhat resigned in knowing that Alex was one of three. Their past relationship, the way Alex had helped temper Michael’s feelings toward Max after graduation, had bought a lot of goodwill with Max.

“He’s not,” Isobel replied, suddenly coming out of her still trance. She immediately reached for her handbag to dig out a bottle of nail polish remover to drink from, causing Kyle to make an aborted move to stop her. “We’re not considered threats in his opinion, we’ve been too humanized by our adopted parents. Michael was on the radar for a little while after high school, but-” Isobel gestured toward the kitchen where Alex’s voice was barely audible. “True love mellowed him out, neutered him so to speak.”

“Isobel, that’s- you’re taking that out of context,” Jim protested, as he rubbed his eyes tiredly, ducking the concern from Kyle. “When you kids were found, of course I knew what you were, but I never said anything to the Project. You were all so frightened, but trusting. I thought, violence is learned in a lot of ways. Sp Michelle and I did our best to find you good homes-”

“Seriously? Fucking nature versus nuture shit?” Michael took a deep breath trying to push down the sudden rage. “Your principles suck man, you let me, the fucked up and agitated one, the one was scrawling on the walls, rot in the foster care system. I was considered too much work to be adoptable, you’re lucky I’m not a serial killer after what humans put me through.” Abruptly he realized that Alex was at his side again, a comforting strength to lean on.

It was Jim’s turn to frown, “Michael, you weren’t the one considered unadoptable at the group home.” His dark eyes flickered toward his protege and back to Michael. Max pushed himself away from the wall, his arms uncrossing slowly as the meaning sank in.

“It’s true, I saw it in his mind,” Isobel smiled sadly. “Max was the wild one, but you took the crayon from him, Michael. You took the blame.”

“Ann and Dave are good people, I knew that they could handle Max, raise him with love and understanding, and they did.” Jim straightened, his shoulders firming in resolve and meeting Max’s wounded expression, “You’re a good man, Max. I’ve watched you grow up and be a fine police officer, honorable to the core. You may not like what I did, but I stand by it.”

“Right,” Max spat out with a thick voice, “I’ve been blaming myself my whole life for leaving Michael behind, feeling guilty that I got the family, and you’re telling me that I was right to feel that way, that it was my fault.”

Michael cleared his throat, feeling Alex nudge his shoulder gently as his mind raced over the possibilities. The familiar irritation of past fights flared up, sparked as always by Max wanted to martyr himself over Michael’s life. Old feelings stirred with the new information, wounds that still bled slowly inside, raked rawly anew. The time to deal with that was after.

“We can debate our fucked up family dynamics later, the important issue is there’s a prison full of our people being held by the military and we need to figure out how to save them.” The focus of the group returned to Jim Valenti, as Michael stepped closer to the sheriff.

“Um, before we move off of fucked up family dynamics, why did you decide to kill my dad now after all these years? He’s been a monster from day one, which you knew, so I’m just curious about the timing.”

The Sheriff shifted in the chair, as Kyle leaned forward with interest. Once again, Isobel spoked up, “He got tired of being blackmailed by your dad, Alex.”

“Blackmail?” Kyle echoed.

This time, Jim beat Isobel to the disclosure, getting up to approach his son directly. “You know I’m not a perfect man, that I made mistakes in the past, and Jesse knew-”

“I know you cheated on Mom, okay?”

“There was a child-”

“Wait, I have a sibling?”

“Had a sibling. Yes. She was murdered in 2008 by an alien.”

Michael bit his cheek deeply, not daring to look at Max as the penny dropped for him during the tense exchange between Jim and Kyle Valenti. The source of Jesse Manes’s hold on Jim Valenti was Rosa Ortecho. He wondered if Liz had known that her high school boyfriend and her sister shared a father. That was drama on the level of a morning talk show that sported thrown chairs and DNA test revelations.

#this hard heart #Anonymous #michael week day 7 #malex fic #six sentence sunday #way more than that #wip whine #malex fic in progress

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happybeeps-nat · 4 years

Text

header by @ao3commentoftheday

Alternate chapter 2 for You Look So Alive words: 3,401 (yep, I never ended up using them. I’m the worst) context: picks up right after Finn and Poe separated in chapter 1, Pe goes home with Bee-Bee A/N: this is for @imtheoutgoingsidekick-baby, completely unedited, I didn’t even read through it again before posting so I’m sorry lmao please bear in mind that there’s a reason I abandoned this

“Pa, we’re back,” Poe called as he pulled off his shoes and put his keys in the little bowl like the responsible adult he almost was. He followed Bee to free her from the harness and lead and stashed them in their rightful place.

“I’m in the kitchen,” his dad called back, followed by the distinctive clatter of him obviously trying to sort through their mess of pans.

Poe looked at the clock above the door. It was only 5:17. Wasn’t it a bit early for dinner? He decided to go see what his dad was up to.

And really, there he was, several pots and pans on the stove, apparently trying to figure out what pan to use for whatever he had planned next.

“Hey,” he greeted. “Are we expecting guests?”

His dad nodded while stirring something that smelled like his dad’s famous chili, then moved to chop veggies before checking the oven. “Yeah, turns out we are. Leia and Han are coming over for dinner.” He sounded tense, even pissed, and Poe was massively confused. Leia, Han and his dad were like Snap, Jess and he. Best friends and always up to spending time together even though their schedules didn’t align as often as they’d like.

“Is that not a good thing,” asked Poe, frowning.

“Oh, it is. Let me just--“ he stirred the pot some more before grabbing a fresh spoon and checking if he was satisfied with the taste. Then he took another spoon and put it in the pot right next to it and offered it to Poe. “Try this, this is the one for you and whoever else is veggie or vegan.”

Poe did. It was delicious. As always when Kes Dameron cooked, which was almost every day under Poe’s watchful eyes so he could learn some tricks. “Mmmh,” he nodded. “Very good. And it’s vegan, yeah?” Poe was a bit confused there, he wasn’t vegan and neither were Han or Leia.

“Yeah, don’t know everyone’s dietary preferences, so I though better safe than sorry.”

“Everyones? Paps, what’s going on? Who’s coming for dinner?”

Kes looked at the clock, turned down the heat on the two pots and oven to pull out a bunch of self-made tortillas. They always put them in the oven twice but not too long or they’s get too dry. Really, his dad cooking was more of a science than anything else and Poe usually liked to watch him be very concentrated. Now, though, he wanted answers.

Kes closed the oven and finally turned to look at his son, wiping the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand. He looked Poe up and down and frowned slightly. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Poe dismissed. “So, what’s happening? What was it with the phone call earlier? Why are you preparing dinner for, like, ten people?”

“Leia called me earlier,” his dad began to explain, turning back around to check if everything was okay, if the heat was off and if it was safe to leave the kitchen. Then he gestured for Poe to follow him into the living room where Bee-Bee was excited to see them but didn’t move from her place on the couch, pretty sure that Poe would come to her. And he did. He was easy like that.

“So, Leia called,” Poe reminded his dad, hoping he would keep going.

He nodded. “She told me Luke was back.”

“Luke?” Poe frowned. “Wait, you mean… uncle Luke? Leia’s brother? He’s still alive?” He felt incredibly stupid to be asking that, because obviously he was still alive, man. It’s just that for years nobody had seen him or heard of him. “It must be, like, what? Ten years?”

“Eleven,” his dad sighed and ran a hand down his face. “He didn’t call, didn’t leave a text or a note. Just disappeared on us and comes back eleven years later, apparently with the brightest smile on his face and two kids in tow.”

“Excuse me?” Surely, that was a joke.

“Yeah. Apparently, he decided to adopt. Because apparently, he can do that now.”

Poe didn’t know what to say but also didn’t feel the right to judge Luke. He had last seen him when he was seven, right after… well. Right after his mother died. He took a deep breath and really, really didn’t want to judge Luke.

“So he has two little kids now, lives here again, and they’re all gonna come here for dinner to have an awkward and possibly bitter family reunion?” he clarified.

“Yup, seems like it. Leia wanted neutral ground. She doesn’t know me if she thinks I’m neutral ground for Luke fucking Skywalker.” The bitterness in his voice, the barely suppressed anger kind of broke Poe’s heart a bit because he knew where it was coming from.

“Paps, hey. Maybe he can explain.” Poe moved to sit beside his old man, rubbing a hand up and down his back. “Let’s just see what happens, okay? Maybe it won’t be too bad. And if it does get bad, this is your house, feel free to kick him out whenever you want to.”

At that, his dad grinned. “You’re right, I’ll just be a real Dameron and kick his ass if I smell funny business.”

“That’s the spirit,” Poe laughed.

After a while, his dad added, “They’re not little kids, though.”

“They’re not?”

Kes shook his head. “From what Leia told me, they’re your age.” He shrugged. “But I guess we’ll see anyway, he’s bringing them along.”

Yeah, that made sense… Poe didn’t really know how to feel about everything he’d just learned. But he tried to be open to anything, maybe Luke was this really cool and outgoing and charming guy and the adults would forget all about being mad at him. And maybe his kids were cool, too, and they’d all be having a good time.

Speaking of a good time! “Hey, is it still cool if Jess and Snap are coming?”

Kes grinned and got up. “Sure, I’ll make some more churros then.”

Poe laughed and stood as well, stretching his back with a groan. He found his dad looking at him, his head tilted, squinting a little.

“Poe. You sure you’re okay? You look beat.” Hah. The irony.

“I’m fine, paps, really. Just tired. And I really wanna go out and cuddle with Bee in the garden for a while. Call me when you need help in the kitchen or wherever?”

“Will do. Call me when you wanna talk about it?”

Poe huffed a laugh but nodded. “Will do. Thanks, paps.”

And as much as he wanted to go lie in the grass with his dog and not be a person for a few minutes, what he needed right now was a hug. So he went in for one, wrapped his arms lightly around his old man and felt him hug back tightly, making Poe tighten his arms, too. Dameron men were always down for hugs and Poe loved it, especially now. His dad was just a few inches taller than him but it always made him feel like he was just a little boy being held safely in his dad’s arms. Nothing could get to him here, nothing could hurt him here, not even Ben Solo. It was weird, it was probably stupid to be feeling that way about his father’s hugs at 18, but he didn’t particularly care about that. Society telling him it was stupid would probably only be one more reason for him to hug his dad, so there was that.

After a while, they let go of each other and Kes gave him a sort of bittersweet “I am your father and I love you but I am worried about you, son”-smile before returning to the kitchen.

“C’mon, Bee, let’s go outside and lie in the sun for a while,” Poe said to his already very excited dog. She yapped and seemed very happy at the prospect of just lying in the sun and getting all the scratches and belly rubs from Poe.

And so they lay there in the warm, soft grass. Poe on his back with his eyes closed, Bee-Bee next to him, her head on his chest, enjoying his gentle strokes and scratches. Lots of people didn’t think dogs could purr but Bee-Bee was ready to prove them wrong as she was practically vibrating, and Poe just loved her a lot, okay.

He was feeling calmer by the minute, breathing slowly and evenly, his eyes closed against the world and feeling safe again. Sometimes he was pretty sure his dad was watching them through the glass door leading to the garden but he was too comfortable to move and see if the was right, trusting his dad would call for him if he needed help.

After a while – it could have been an hour or five minutes, Poe didn’t know and he was pretty sure he nodded off once or twice – he did call, asking if he could prepare the table outside because there was more room in their garden than anywhere else in the house. A delicious smell tickled his nose which definitely made getting up easier. As he stood, so did his loyal, wonderful dog, looking up expectantly, and he smiled.

“Stay, Bee, I’m gonna be right back.” Before he went inside, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to her head and scratched behind her ear again. “Good girl,” he cooed when she returned to lying in the grass, her watchful eyes never leaving him.

Poe went to wipe down the table and chairs before getting the cushions to make them more comfortable for their guests. “Paps, how many people are we gonna be?”

“When are Jess and Temmin coming again?”

“Not until after dinner, you know them,” he called back from where he was fastening the cushions.

“Then it’s Leia, Han, Luke and his kids, you and me. That makes seven.”

“So Ben is not coming?” Poe asked just to be sure.

“Is he ever?” his dad grumbled, and Poe could not answer from the sheer relief he felt. Ben was not coming. He was probably out bullying another kid who wasn’t white, rich and hetero. Idiot Nazi piece of shit.

“Poe?” his dad called again.

“Huh?”

“I asked if you could help me set the table, the plates are already on the counter.”

“Yeah, sorry, that one chair gave me trouble,” he tried to deflect from his actual thoughts.

Thankfully his dad did not press and either chose to ignore him or really had more pressing matters to attend to in the kitchen.

Before long, Poe had set the table, prepared the other chairs so they would be clean, warm and comfortable, and helped his dad chop the rest of the vegetables into small bits for the burritos they were going to have for dinner.

6:30 came sooner than either of them had expected and just as the clock went from 29 to 30 the doorbell rang. Wow, someone sure loved being exactly on time.

“I’ll get it, can you put the tortillas in the oven again, por favor?” Kes said, wiping his hands on a towel and greeting their guests. Poe hoped his dad opening the door and dealing with the first inevitable awkwardness would lighten up the whole situation a little. So stayed back happily, preparing the tortillas and checking if the salsa and kidney-bean mix in the pots was warm enough, careful not to let it get too hot.

He could hear his dad and their guests, obviously, their house was not exactly spacious. Leia and Han were there and had apparently brought a bottle of wine that was way too expensive, so his dad made a fuss that Leia chose to ignore. And then there were other voices, strange voices that struck him as familiar in a very weird way. Must be Luke then. It made sense for his voice to be strange yet familiar, it had been eleven years after all.

They hadn’t really moved into the house yet but stayed in the hallway, probably still by the door, and Poe if Poe weren’t surrounded by delicious food, he’d think he could smell the awkwardness in the air. It was very unlike Kes Dameron to let any kind of awkwardness last more than two seconds, and this situation was a testament to how much Like Skywalker seemed to unnerve him. And Han and Leia, too, since nobody spoke for a while.

Well, couldn’t have that! “Dinner’s almost ready! Paps, get our guests something to drink and go outside, I’ve got this!”

That seemed to do the trick. There was a bustle as Kes led everyone outside and asked for their drink orders. After all, he took a Dameron Dinner very seriously, even though it was a very common occurrence. His dad was a picture-perfect people person. And Poe apparently into alliterations. Huh.

Poe took the tortillas out of the oven and covered the plate so they would stay warm, and filled the contents from the pots into bowls. He balanced the two plates of tortillas on one arm and grabbed one bowl of salsa-mix to bring them outside while his dad carried a tray with drinks after him.

He greeted their guests with a charming smile but concentrated on not being an idiot and dropping anything. “Good evening, everyone. I’m Poe, I’m your server tonight,” he joked as he set down the dishes. “Let me just get the rest and I’ll be all yours,” he added before he disappeared again.

He grabbed the last bowls and something to drink for himself before heading out again to properly greet everyone.

This time, he nearly did drop something. Because there, sitting next to who must have been Luke his daughter – a very beautiful girl – sat the boy. His boy. The boy who saved him!

“Poe?” his dad asked, a concerned frown on his face and Poe realised he had stopped in his tracks. In the door. And he was staring. At the boy. The beautiful boy who was looking at his plate and didn’t look like he wanted to be around a bunch of strangers in a stranger’s house.

“Yeah, sorry, hi everyone!” he grinned and set down the last bowl. Then he moved to Leia, greeting her first with a quick hug that could have been awkward for anyone who was not Poe Dameron, Master Of Hugs.

“Hello, Poe, so nice to see you again,” she smiled up at him from where she was sitting in her chair.

“You say that now,” he winked. “Just wait until tomorrow, you’ll wish you wouldn’t be seeing me all that often, General.”

She swatted at him and rolled her eyes. “Just keep out of my office a little more than last year, Dameron, I swear to God!”

Poe laughed. “No promises, ma’am.” Then he moved on to Han who gave him an eyeroll and a handshake, which was their usual greeting. Sometimes Poe thought Han didn’t really like him, but they had their moments. He’d figured a while ago that Han was just a grumpy and cynical person in general.

Then he reached Luke who actually got up again to greet him. Or he thought he did. But Luke was just staring at him. “You’ve really grown up, hm?” was all he said, awe in his eyes, realisation, and maybe something a little sadder.

Before Poe could say something, he heard his dad clear his throat and mutter something but he didn’t quite catch it. He ignored him and smiled at Luke, willing to give the man a chance.

“Well, you’d think that, but in here,” he tapped his temple, “I’m still that little boy that gets himself in trouble. So if I were you, I wouldn’t get my hopes up.”

Luke grinned, then laughed which sounded a lot like relief and pulled Poe into a hug that he reciprocated gladly. He didn’t seem so bad – he laughed at Poe’s jokes after all.

“I’m Rey,” the girl sitting beside Luke said and raised her hand, clearly expecting him to shake it. So he did.

“Poe. Nice to meet you, Rey. I love your hair,” he remarked and while he usually tried to make strangers more comfortable by complimenting them, he really absolutely did love her hair. Three buns of exactly the same size, it seemed.

She grinned and blushed a little, taking her hand back more slowly than she had reached out. “Thank you, Poe,” she said and she really sounded flattered and happier, less tense than just a second before.

And then he moved on. To the boy who was not just in Poe’s garden right after meeting him in a less than flattering situation! Nope, Poe must be dreaming or something. He fell asleep earlier and this was a dream, because the boy was now looking up at him, an eyebrow raised, and a little smile on his face.

“And you are?” Poe asked with an air of what he hoped was nonchalance, smiling politely at the beautiful boy and his big dark eyes.

“Finn,” he answered, very amused or intrigued or shocked or maybe all of the above.

“Poe, hi.”

“Hi, Poe. Nice to meet you,” he grinned and Poe actually felt heat rise in his cheeks. This was not happening! He couldn’t decide if he wanted to be happy or embarrassed or curious or all of the above. And he was staring at the boy, a grin plastered on his face, and Finn was staring at him, too, a very similar grin dancing on his lips. And this was not happening!

“Well,” his dad cleared his throat again and Poe realised everyone was staring at them, curious looks of confusion and even amusement on their faces – or in Leia’s case, a smug smile Poe couldn’t get behind. “Let’s get some food, shall we?”

And so the Dameron Dinner in capital letters, because everything was home-made and his dad a magician in the kitchen, began. “This looks very delicious, Kes,” Leia praised as she grabbed a tortilla and helped herself. There were nods of agreement from all around the table.

“Thank you for this, Mr Dameron,” Finn said and Poe’s heart raced because his voice was so smooth and the smile he gave his dad was so genuine and sweet.

“Stop it with the formalities, I’m Kes to you! And no problem, kid, I hope you’ll like what Poe and I made.”

“Oh, you helped?” Finn asked, curious. And Poe knew exactly where he was coming from. When did you manage to help with that between getting the shit scared out of you and getting punched in the gut. Twice.

“Nah,” Poe shook his head as he swallowed a bite of his burrito. “He just likes to share the praise. I literally just set the table, al the magic happening here is his fault.”

“You did help, though,” his dad insisted and Poe rolled his eyes but smiled. And Finn smiled, too, carefully taking a bite of his burrito and managing to keep the thing from falling apart.

Luke and Rey looked a bit overwhelmed and unsure of their technique, so Poe felt obligated to show them how to eat a burrito and not make a mess of themselves. He was met with grateful smiles and just so nobody would feel too bad, he loosened his grip a little, causing a bit of salad and cheese and salsa to fall on his plate. One of the two only plates who had until then been very clean.

Naturally, his eyes moved to Finn. Not because he was, like, drawn to him or something, nope. Only because they were sitting opposite each other and really had no choice but to meet each other’s eyes again and again. Because Finn was looking at him, too. And he was smiling a soft smile like he knew exactly what Poe had done just now. That soft smile of his, it was making Poe feel bold above all else. Still meeting Finn’s eyes, he winked at the boy, who looked away immediately, trying to suppress that sweet smile of his from happening, and Poe was sure he saw a flush a little. Although he could not be entirely sure with that wonderful dark skin of his. Anyway, a boy could dream.

#trivia tuesday #alternate chapter #finnpoe #stormpilot #star wars fanfic #teenage au #you look so alive #ylsa #chapter 2 #i dont even remember what i thought of this and its probably awkward but while i'm busy writing chapter 9 here you GO #thanks for asking mags :D #as you could see i have more *side-eyes myself*#i really need to stop with this bullshittery of alternate chapters help #wonder why it takes me so long to update? here's why #nat rambles #nat writes #this also reminds me to pick up again the storyline with kylo and also with luke and kes and help i have too much going on in this fic #but you love it huh #wild

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lumiolivierlithium · 3 years

Text

The Good Old Days Chapter Nineteen: A Dangerous Criminal

A/N: I really need to start scheduling these posts. When I go out of town, I probably will, but here nor there. SO! I know this is up a little late than normal, but I've had a little one to keep up with this morning and I slept a little late, so here. Take this chapter as an apology. Love you! x

This was fucking ridiculous. Why the hell would cops show up on our door? I already called the Old Man, so it wasn’t because of work. All I knew was that some kind of kidnapping was a thing. But on a more positive note, this mess taught me something. And like the Old Man said. There’s no such thing as a mistake if it’s learned from. Then, it’s a lesson. And this lesson was the fact that I had a real ride or die at my side. Vanessa didn’t have to come with me. I would’ve taken her home. In hindsight, I should have. Just to keep her out of the crossfire. Yet, I gave her the option. And she chose me. It felt good to be chosen.

When we got back home, I made sure to keep Vanessa close. I love my brothers, but they’re hounds. And my girlfriend’s cute as fuck. I didn’t see them. We can fix that, “Tony! César! Estoy en casa! Dónde están?”

“Están aqui,” César came out of the bedroom with Tony following closely behind him, “Now, what the fuck did you do?”

“What the fuck, César?” I got defensive, “Nothing! Why did I become the fucking suspect of a sudden?”

“Because,” César growled, “When those cops were here, I was watching them to make sure they weren’t planting anything. That’s why.”

“About that, César…” Tony chimed in.

“Not now, Tony,” César snapped, “I’m too fucking pissed to deal with your bullshit.”

“And what exactly did I do that brought cops here?” I regained his focus, “Not to mention, warrant you chewing me a new asshole here?!”

“I’m glad you asked, Frankie,” César sat down, “They asked both Tony and me when the last time we had any contact with Vanessa Scarlotti was.”

“Me?” Vanessa wondered, “The other day. Why would they want to know that?”

“Their prime suspect is considered a dangerous criminal from around here,” César started to calm down, “I didn’t say she was dating my little brother. I didn’t even say I knew her. Apparently, you were kidnapped, Vanessa.”

“And I’m a dangerous criminal?” I scoffed, “I mean, I know I do some sketchy shit for the Old Man from time to time, but I wouldn’t exactly say I’m dangerous. Not for her anyway.”

“I feel pretty safe with you,” Vanessa cuddled into me, “I hate to say it, Frankie. Especially since last night was so wonderful. But this feels like my mother’s handiwork.”

“Does she have any pull with local porkchops?” César got up and walked to the window, opening up a new pack of cigarettes.

“A few,” she winced, “But again. She doesn’t need the pull. She has the family name.”

“She wouldn’t go this far, though,” I took her hand, “Right?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised.”

“So,” César lit his cigarette, “You didn’t do anything?”

“No,” I assured him, “Aside from what I do for the Old Man, I stay out of trouble.”

“Ok,” César let it go, his hand on my shoulder, “Good. I got worried for a sec, Frankie.”

“You know me better than that,” I threw an arm around my girl, “I’m just kidnapping one girl these days.”

“I’m with him willingly,” Vanessa swore, “If this ever goes to court, consent goes a long way.”

“So,” I figured, “If this does go to court, I’d be in the clear?”

“Frankie,” she kissed my cheek, “You got the best damn almost legal council in the city. Let them put my ass on the stand. Let them try to use dirty tricks on me. Take everything I say out of context. I fucking dare them. I know those same tricks. I got this.”

If she’s not careful, I might want to keep her around, “That is the hottest fucking thing you have ever said.”

“I wouldn’t get too excited if I were you,” Vanessa settled me, “If this is my mother at work, which it’s starting to feel that way, she’d make sure I never got on the stand. She’d spin it to where I’m too traumatized after everything I’ve been through to think clearly. Therefore, everything I’d say would automatically be ruled invalid. But I’d be sure to push for a psych evaluation, so it’s not totally her word against mine.”

“Ok, I lied, “I held onto her, never wanting to let her go, “That was the hottest thing you’ve ever said.”

“I’m serious, Frankie,” she gave me a little smack to the shoulder, “I’m trying to keep your ass out of jail, if it gets that far. You’re too pretty for prison. You know…Since I’m in love with a dangerous criminal.”

“I kidnapped the oldest daughter of the Scarlotti family from their party last night,” I gave her a little kiss, “And I’d be glad to do it again and again and again. I get what I want.”

“You didn’t kidnap me,” Vanessa laid her head on my shoulder, “You liberated me, Frankie. You did what any loving boyfriend would and got me the fuck out of there. I can’t ever fault you for that.”

“Not that this isn’t a touching moment,” César stepped in, effectively killing that touching moment, “But what are we going to do? I don’t know about you, but I’d rather not deal with…”

Knock, knock.

Out of sheer survival instinct, my brothers and I ducked in front of the couch, making sure we weren’t visible from the door. If someone’s knocking, they don’t come back without a warrant. It was at that moment where I truly realized how different my world and Vanessa’s world were. She got up from the couch and checked the peephole. I’d put that girl’s bravery against any US Marine any day of the week, “You’re safe, boys. No cops.”

Maybe she did get it. A little anyway. I watched her fiddle with the lock and let the Old Man in, “Hiya, sweetheart.”

“Hi, Old Man,” Vanessa fell into his arms with the biggest smile on her face. I loved seeing those two together as much as Vanessa with Mama. He adored her. I knew he’d never try anything with her. Or worse, get her involved with anything. Unless I needed emergency council. Then, she’d gladly step in.

“You know,” he thought, “I was here to see your man and maybe his brothers just to make sure they were all doing ok, but I wasn’t expecting to meet you at the door.”

“Here I am,” she shrugged, “Where else would you find me?”

“I’m finding you all over the place,” the Old Man took a spot at the kitchen table, “What kind of shit have you gotten yourself into, Frankie?”

“See?” César jumped down my throat, “I knew I wasn’t going to be the only one to think you fucked up!”

“Thanks, Old Man,” I rolled my eyes, “Now, you got him started.”

“Sorry, kid,” the Old Man chuckled to himself, “But you are definitely in some deep shit here. This is just me, but if I were you, I’d be laying low today. No calling any attention to yourself.”

“That sounds like a hell of an idea,” I agreed. I already had plans to stay around home today anyway.

“You know what?” Vanessa got up from my lap, “I think I’ll just go home and make nice. Maybe I can make this all just blow over.”

“Vanessa,” I tried to hold her back, “No. You don’t need to deal with that.”

“Frankie,” she gave me one last kiss, “I’d much rather sneak out to see you here than a conjugal visit in jail. I can take care of this, too. It’s alright. Besides, I’ll see you later tonight.”

“Promise?” I didn’t want to let her go. I knew what kind of fire she’d be walking into and I didn’t like the feeling it put in my stomach.

“I promise,” Vanessa curled into my shoulder, “Where should we meet? And when?”

“How about…” I thought it over, “You and me. Downtown Diner. Back corner booth?”

“They have the best fucking coconut cream pie,” she swooned, “Yes, please.”

“Alright then,” I kissed her cheek, “It’s a date. I’ll see you tonight.”

“Yes, you will,” Vanessa swore, getting a better kiss out of me. And far be it for me to say no.

“I love you, Vanessa…”

“I love you more,” she got up from my lap and walked out the door. I’m going to miss her. But I’ll see her tonight. At least I sure as fuck hope so. I don’t want this little patch of bullshit to ruin us. Although…Now that I think about it…Dammit, Veronica might be onto something.

“You know, Frankie,” the Old Man hid a little smile on his face, “You need to keep that one around.”

“That’s the plan for the foreseeable future,” I admitted, “If we ever break up, I’m definitely keeping her number. She’s going to make a hell of a lawyer one day.”

“You think so?”

“Oh fuck yeah,” I nodded, “She already had the fucking court case figured out if charges ever get pressed. I love this girl, Old Man. She’s something special.”

“You do need to lay low for the day, Frankie,” César warned me, “Like…I might not let you leave this apartment kind of lay low.”

“It’s not going to be that bad,” the Old Man vouched for me. And God bless him. There’s no way in hell I’m going to be ok being held captive by my oldest brother. I love César. I really do. But Jesus Christ…Being stuck in this apartment with him all day until I get to go run for the Old Man and he goes to the restaurant sounds like my own personal hell. And I don’t need that in my life, “Because I know you’d be going stir crazy here, kid, why don’t you come work in the Narrows for the day?”

“Because I don’t do that enough at night?” I giggled.

“That’s not what I meant,” he clarified, “I’m saying you come bartend in the Narrows.”

“Really?” It’s not that I couldn’t do it. It’s that…Really? I thought I started working for the Old Man in order to get away from shit like that.

“What?” he jabbed, “You too good for honest work anymore? You figured getting in close with one of the biggest bosses in the city was your ticket to the good life?”

“It has been, Old Man,” I pointed out, “It’s not like I’ve been struggling too hard lately. Mama doesn’t even know I’ve paid the rent for the next six months in full already.”

“Excuse me?” César gasped.

“Yeah, Frankie!” Tony squeaked, “When were you going to tell us this?”

“Where the fuck has our money been going?”

“Relax,” I settled them, “There’s been a jar in the ceiling tiles for the last couple months. That’s where your money’s been going. I was thinking it’d go to the Spain trip.”

“It has been a while since we’ve been home,” César admitted, “That’d be nice.”

“Old Man,” I asked, “Would you be cool with letting me go for a couple weeks while we go visit la familia?”

“I’m appalled that you thought you had to ask,” the Old Man scoffed, “Of course, I would. That’s fine. Now, it’s settled. You’re coming with me and you’re bartending in the Narrows for the day. That way, if someone wants to get curious and finds out where Francisco Mendoza works, it’s honest. It’s not like you’re on any official paperwork for the other side of things. It’ll be alright. Now, I’ll ask you again. Are you too good to bartend in the Narrows, Frankie?”

“No,” I shook my head.

“Good answer,” the Old Man got up from the table, “It’s alright, César. I can keep an eye on him for the day and make sure he stays out of trouble. And if he gets into trouble, it’ll be all on me.”

“Alright,” César let me go. He knew the Old Man wasn’t going to let me get in too deep of trouble. He knew where I’d be. I wouldn’t be surprised if both César and Tony come in either before work or on their break. My brother threw an arm around me and hugged me tight, “Be. Fucking. Careful.”

“Eggshells,” I promised him, “Got it.”

And just like that, I went from letting Vanessa go back home to the bar in the Narrows where the Old Man’s office was tucked away. As I liked to call it, my favorite front. If anything needed to be taken care of, it went through here. It wasn’t too far away from the warehouse either. I think there might be an alley between them. Still, this bar was starting to feel like a second home to me. I mean, I was in here every single night. With the exceptions of Sundays. The Old Man was a stickler for tradition and I got Sundays off. It’s weird to think I’ll be working honest in here…

“You do know how to mix a drink,” the Old Man hoped, “Right, kid?”

“Yeah,” I nodded, “Don’t worry about it. I got this handled.”

“Good,” he nudged me forward, “Then, get behind the bar and get to work.”

“Got it, boss,” I gladly jumped behind the bar. When I still worked at the restaurant, our usual bartender would call in for a hangnail and I’d be the one taking her shift. Those were the few nights at the restaurant that were actually fun. No amount of money would ever make me want to go back there, but I could get used to this. If the Old Man ever wanted to make this a little more permanent. But that would mean bartending full time on top of the running I did for him. I’m sure I’d be able to manage.

If we’re being honest, this isn’t all that bad. It’s peaceful in its own special way. People that came in here weren’t too terribly loud or demanding. It was nice. I liked it here. It’s pretty alright. I could get used to this. Although, I couldn’t help but worry. I hope Vanessa’s doing ok. I’m sure she’s getting chewed out by her mother like I did with César when we got back earlier. Still…I couldn’t wait to see her tonight. Downtown Diner was a damn good diner. Food was cheap, but fuck, it was so good. I’m impressed her blue blood doesn’t burn when she walks in. Then again, Vanessa isn’t just any blue blood.

“Kidnapped daughter of the Scarlotti family was returned safely this afternoon,” the fuzzy TV above me barked, immediately catching my attention. Excuse me? I’m pretty sure she wasn’t kidnapped. We just went over this. She was never kidnapped. You’re only getting one side of the story, Channel 2. Sure enough, Vanessa’s lovely mother was plastered on the news, not Vanessa. Just like Vanessa said, she’s going to spin this where Vanessa’s too traumatized to talk about what the scoundrel did to her.

Victoria’s words burned my ass to no end. She didn’t know me. The only thing she knew was that I had no pedigree. That I wasn’t hand picked by her. That I was just some mutt from Williamsburg after Vanessa for her money. She’s milking this for sympathy and it made me fucking sick. I couldn’t do this. If I kept going, I knew I was going to end up taking out some unbridled rage on a customer and I made a promise to César I wouldn’t call any attention to myself. Pretty sure a bar fight would not be in my best interest. So, what did I do? The next best thing.

“Old Man,” I walked into his office like I owned the place and shut the door behind me, “We got a problem. And a really big one.”

“I know,” the Old Man empathized, “I saw. Trust me, Frankie. Vanessa’s a good girl and I fucking love her to pieces.”

“You’re telling me,” I grumbled. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for that girl. If it meant throwing myself into fire for the sake of keeping her warm, damn right, I would.

“But believe me when I say Victoria Scarlotti is a mess,” he swore, “She is beyond a mess. I love you, kid. You don’t want to tangle with that.”

“If it means getting Vanessa out of that tangle,” I stood my ground, “I’d do it a thousand times over. Old Man, I love her daughter. I love two of her daughters! Because I can’t leave Veronica out of this either. You saw what I did for her. I’d fucking kill someone for Veronica. Just imagine what I’d be prepared to do for Vanessa.”

“I’m telling you, Frankie,” the Old Man warned me, “It will not be pretty.”

“But she is,” I argued, holding back a little smile, “I see this is what I have to look forward to. She’s going to have to learn to make nice with me.”

“What do you mean?” he wondered, “Victoria’s not a tiger that changes her stripes so easily. Why do you think she’s going to make nice with you?”

“I don’t care if we don’t have her approval,” I could finally start to relax again, “I haven’t really told anyone this. Hell, I haven’t even said it out loud to myself. But…”

The Old Man knew where I was taking this, but he had to coax it out of me, “But…? Something you’d care to share with the rest of us, Frankie?”

I couldn’t keep this shit to myself anymore. I wanted to scream it from the roof of the Empire State Building if I had to. Someone’s bound to find out eventually, “I think I want to marry Vanessa…”

#the good old days #fan fiction prequel #oc backstory #mafia au #for the family #switch

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lihikainanea · 4 years

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All sentimental, reading OG Bill x Tiger like that morning sex piece where she says she wants to be ‘even closer’ when cuddling. Can we PLZ talk about sleepy, romantic cockwarming? Like, they’re too tired from a long day to even indulge in lazy sex- but need SOMETHING. I picture them both being too stubborn to admit that they’re too tired for their usual kind of lovin’ - Bonus points (fuckin hell) if he gets a little desperate with the sleepy whispers “need to be inside you” 🥺💦

LISTEN MAN I am just out here low key trying to get my thoughts into the internet world and here ya’ll are COMING FOR MY LIFE.

Nani, baby, I could talk forever about cockwarming. I could talk for even longer about cockwarming in a subby context. And I could talk for even longer than that about subby tiger, cockwarming, and how Good Dude Bill just makes her feel so loved and safe and comfy.

My train of thought derails splits and ya’ll just gonna HAVE. TO. DEAL.

So like, it’s been A Day for our girl tiger, right? A day full of balls-to-the-wall shit. I don’t know about any of you guys, but I’m the smallest fucking subbiest thing behind closed doors but in public? On the dating scene? At my job? Get the fuck out of my way before I destroy you and everything you love. I am ruthless. And my job often requires me to be a powerhouse, to go up against men much more influential and powerful than me in every way, and I can’t show an iota of weakness. Not one, because I’ll be fucking eaten alive.

But the thing is, when I have days that require me to really push it, to really be aggressive and authoritative, Jesus, emotionally and mentally when I get home it pushes me into such a small space. Because I like it when somebody else has control, I like it when I don’t feel like I need to be the one handling everything, and secretly I love it when someone forces me to yield. It’s nice to lose, in that sense. To give up the clutches of control.

In any case, maybe tiger is the same, and she’s had a day full of too many things that made her feel too in control, and now she’s fussy. Having a lot of anxiety about it. And she’s definitely not fussy in a bratty way, she’s not gunning for a punishment and in all reality probably couldn’t handle one anyway, but she’s fussy in a needy, emotional way. She’s really clinging on to him for most of the night but she’s also fidgeting, she’s doing that nervous habit thing where she’s picking at her lip--and when Bill gently reaches to pull her hand away and hold it instead, 30 seconds later she’s bouncing her knee uncontrollably. And when he puts his hand on that to stop it, then she’s scratching at the back of her hand and he can see the first onset of hives start to break out. So when he stops that, she huffs--maybe even gets up, walks away. There’s just so much nervous energy that she’s having a hard time reeling in. She didn’t eat much at dinner, got too warm in the bubble bath he drew for her after to relax, and she wants affection but is also kind of getting annoyed by his touch. He lets her be, he intervenes when he can see her mind getting away on her too much--like when she starts picking her lip again--but otherwise, when she’s this kind of fussy, she needs to be left alone a bit.

And when it’s bed time, Bill goes to get her at the kitchen table where she’s sketching or knitting or whatever, her knee bouncing out of control. He’ll coax her to the bathroom to brush her teeth while he gets her hot water bottle ready, and then they tuck in together. And Bill’s usually a pretty heavy sleeper--and it’s pretty immediate--but he fights it off a bit, because he knows tiger’s going to have trouble sleeping. He curls around her back, tucks her hot water bottle against her stomach, plops a gentle kiss on her ear and then buries his nose in her neck. She’s the one who reaches for his hand, brings it up to her mouth and slides his thumb inside--and he thinks thats a pretty good sign, maybe she’s ready to relax a bit.

But like, you know how nervous energy is palpable in that incredibly annoying way? Have you ever been able to reel in your own anxiety, when you’re around nervous person? (Because if you have, please tell me how.)

Bill knows he needs to fix it for her, but he’s trying to figure out how. But she’s good--man she’s good--and asking for what she wants would be ballsy and courageous in a way she’s tired of being so she’s not about to do that, but she’ll give him a hint. And very subtly, maybe she just knocks her ass back into him a tad--just a tap.

Bill waits.

But then she whines a little, does it again. And at this point Bill’s not sure if it’s actually sex that she wants, or if she wants that...something else that they tried once.

She speaks up before he can guess.

“Do you remember,” she says as she removes his thumb, “That one time that we...”

And Bill’s on it, immediately. He knows what she means, and he doesn’t want her to have to ask for it. So maybe he shimmies out of his boxers, and gently rolls her over onto her stomach. They’ll be more contact for her this way, more closeness, and she loves it when he rests some of his weight on her. He lifts her t-shirt a little bit, reaches his hand between her legs just to make sure she’s ready and--Jesus, she always is. So he slips inside slowly, fills her up, and it’s always really difficult for the first few seconds--because she’s so tight, so wet for him. But he grits his teeth, and usually after a second or two he can get it under control enough. She sighs and goes boneless under him immediately, sinking into the mattress, tucking her arms under her pillow. Bill lies on her back, caging her arms with his, nuzzling his cheek into her soft skin.

“Is this better sweet girl?” he murmurs to her, and she whimpers a little. And listen, I have no doubt--no doubt at all--that tiger falls into a real deep sleep after this. But I also have NO DOUBT AT ALL--that a few hours later, Bill wakes up to her full on grinding on him, working for it. And the angle is so perfect--it’s difficult for her to move the way she needs but it’s real easy for him, so as soon as he’s awake enough and just drives his hips down into her--they’re both coming in no time at all.

BUT THEN ALSO

Listen, Bill tired as fuck alright? Maybe he’s back from somewhere, maybe she’s on set with him somewhere. He’s pulling real late nights so usually when he stumbles back to his hotel tiger is already curled up in bed, asleep. And it’s a real devastating thing when desire and exhaustion are battling, because nobody wins. And Bill wants to bang her brains out but he also just WANTS SLEEP ALWAYS and these days sleep is winning out.

And like, not only are his nights late, but his mornings are fucking early. And maybe this is the first time in a long time that he has a day off the next day. And he’s dead to the world, but maybe he wakes up real early the next morning just because his internal clock says it’s time to wake up. And he’s super drowsy, not fully awake because he also knows he doesn’t have to be. But then like...tiger backs her ass up into him in her sleep, like she sometimes does. And that friction stirred something--still not enough to wake him up, but something. And he can feel her lips pursing round his thumb, rhythmically sucking, And oh god--she smells so good. And he’s so tired, so warm and cuddly, and he’s a big sappy love bug and wants some more closeness with his girl but he’s nowhere near awake or motivated enough for sex. So instead he just burrows that cute little nose further into her neck, maybe rolls his hips into hers.

“Tiger,” he murmurs in her ear and Jesus if she wasn’t wet before, that’ll do it every time. His gravelly, sleepy voice in her ear, deep and raspy, his warm breath on her neck. She stirs a little.

“Please kid,” he whispers, “Can I....?”

And she’s also very much not awake yet so she just rolls her ass into his groin again, purring a little, which is all the confirmation he needs. So he tugs her panties down, pulls his boxers down to just his mid-thigh, and slowly pushes into her. It’s incredible--it’s euphoric and comforting and warm and just everything he needs. He sighs happily, curls around her even more, locks her tighter in his arms. But tiger--listen, she’s good to him, too. And she wants to make sure that he’s getting what he needs, and not just what’s good enough because that’s all he has the energy for. She doesn’t want him to ever go without something he wants or needs.

“Do you want me to do it for you, bud?” she murmurs sleepily to him, and her offer is clear. If he needs a release he can lie back and she’ll get him there, no strings attached. And he will eventually need that but right now....this is all that wants.

“No,” he says softly, “Just you, kid. Just this.”

#sub tiger #soft bill #sleepy bill #bill skarsgard #bill skarsgard drabble #BFF!Bill

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morrigan24601 · 3 years

Text

More Family Context

So my last post about my oldest stepson and daughter-in-law expecting made me realize that I have never really talked about my stepsons on here before, even though my boyfriend/partner and I have been together for almost 7 years? So I figured I’d do a post about that. Sorry in advance for this - there’s a lot of drama involved, unfortunately.

CW: divorce, custody issues, homophobia/biphobia, manipulation, abuse, parental alienation

Also, obligatory disclaimer that I do not give permission to ANYONE to share this story without my express consent. (I’m doing this because I’ve seen personal stories get shared from Reddit onto YouTube and whatnot and I really do not want that to happen here.)

Looooooooooong, looooooooong post.

...

Years ago, long before I even met my dude, he went through a supremely nasty divorce. His sons with his ex-wife were very small at the time (youngest son was still just a baby/toddler). There was a lot of emotional and verbal abuse on her end. He didn’t talk about it much because he didn’t think anyone would believe him.

Things gradually got worse instead of better after the divorce, unfortunately. As soon as she found out that he had started dating men after the divorce, she began spreading rumors among their mutual friends/acquaintances that he had always been gay (he’s bi), that he had never loved her (he had), and that she had just been a beard for him and this was why they had gotten divorced (it was actually because he had stuck it out for as long as possible and couldn’t handle her abuse any longer). She got very weird about him dating men - like, ultra-homophobic, ridiculous, “I don’t want my sons being molested by your gay boyfriends because I think all/most gay men are secretly pedophiles” weird. She began refusing to let the boys come over to his place as long as he was in a relationship with a man. “If you date women instead, I’ll consider it.”

In hindsight, he absolutely could have fought this in court because they had joint custody and there was no way she should have been able to do this and get away with it. Unfortunately, the state we live in has always been extraordinarily conservative and this was the early-to-mid 2000s, and he worried that he would face additional homophobia/biphobia in court. He also worried that fighting her over anything in court would make everything exponentially worse for both him and the kids. So he just let it go and saw the boys at her place or a neutral location whenever he could.

Eventually he moved out of state to try to make more money. His ex-wife remarried and, almost immediately, she and her new husband began harassing him about giving up his parental rights so that her new husband could adopt the boys and they could “have a real dad”. He was obviously not okay with this, but the manipulation went on for two years. At one point he ran into some temporary difficulty paying child support, and she jumped on this as “proof” that he was a terrible deadbeat dad who didn’t deserve his children.

So finally, after years of his anxiety and depression being exploited by his ex-wife, he finally began thinking that maybe his boys would actually be better off without him, that they’d be better off with a “real family” with a dad who was married to their mom. He drove back to home state and signed away his rights, and it was, he’s told me, the absolute worst day of his life.

She didn’t bother to show up to the hearing where he signed the papers. He found out shortly afterward (and this almost sounds like a bad movie plot, but it’s true) that she had recently divorced the man who was supposed to adopt the boys and hadn’t bothered to inform him of this fact.

She refused to let him see or contact the boys in any way after he signed the papers, and legally, there was no longer anything he could possibly do about it. He attempted to contact them through her quite a few times, but always in vain and he eventually stopped trying because it was too painful. She eventually remarried again and this time her new husband actually did adopt the boys.

Years went by. He and I met and started dating. He told me about the boys on our first date, when I told him I had kids and asked if he had any. “Yes...and also no,” was his somber response. He was...remarkably restrained while talking about his ex-wife that first time. “She’s a strong woman,” he said, “and I hope she’s been a good mom.” I only learned later how abusive she had actually been to him. He sort of...handwaved a lot of it, even when he did tell me. I actually had to tell him “that was abuse. She abused you. Like...hardcore.”

I asked if he ever thought about contacting the kids after they turned 18. He said he definitely wanted to, but he was sort of scared about it.

Fast forward to about 2 1/2 years ago. His oldest son was over 18 now. He was contacted by his oldest son’s girlfriend on Facebook. The message was something along the lines of “Hi, are you [son’s] biological dad? [Son’s mom] and [son] told me some stuff about you, and I thought I’d find you and talk to you about it, because a lot of it seemed really...off. [Son’s mom] said that you were gay and that this was why you divorced [son’s mom] and that after you signed the papers you didn’t want anything to do with the kids, that you never wanted to call or talk to them or anything, and [son] totally believes this because that’s what she’s been telling him his whole life. That seemed weird to me though and I wanted to find out the truth.”

He told her the truth. She was sort of floored, but not overly surprised, because she’d had her own emotionally abusive run-ins with her eventual mother-in-law. There were a lot of conversations over the course of the next year, a lot of her trying to convince oldest son to talk to his bio dad and a lot of resistance from oldest son because of everything he had been raised to believe by his mother. My partner wrote his oldest son a long message at one point explaining some things and telling him how much he loved him while trying to stay as neutral as possible about his ex-wife/son’s mom in order not to stir too much up. Total radio silence from oldest son. We kind of accepted at this point that we might not hear from him for a long time (if ever). Still, partner was still in contact with oldest son’s gf (who at that point had become oldest son’s fiancee), and she and oldest son got married last year. She apologized that they didn’t invite us to the wedding; there was still a lot of hostile awkwardness on oldest son’s part. We understood, and didn’t fault them for it at all.

Finally, a few months after they’d been married, DIL (daughter-in-law) said she wanted to come over, and we agreed. Unexpectedly, she brought oldest son with her, having finally convinced him to come at the last minute. Oldest son was super polite to both of us, and to my kids, but we found out much later he actually felt super awkward and angry and was just hiding it really well. Fortunately after repeated visits he realized his bio dad was a pretty cool guy and that his mom was, to get right to the point, full of shit. There’s been a lot that we’ve found out from oldest son about his mom’s behavior over the years, which is really unfortunate and honestly backs up everything my partner told me. We thankfully have a great relationship with oldest son and DIL now.

Youngest son is now 18 as well (almost 19) but, unfortunately, has much the same outlook as oldest son once did and currently wants nothing to do with his bio dad. However, oldest son and youngest son recently went on a roadtrip together and had a very long talk about the whole thing, and youngest son apparently got sort of thoughtful. We’re hopeful that he will eventually come around too.

Hopefully none of this has sounded like some kind of weird misogyny on my part while talking about my partner’s ex-wife. I just...have zero tolerance for bullies and abusers and she honestly blows my mind. I wanted to believe for a long time that a) there are two sides to every story and the truth of this particular situation possibly lay somewhere in the middle, and b) that maybe she had mellowed over the years and maybe felt at least a twinge remorseful and cooperative about things, but according to oldest son, that is absolutely not the case. She is still holding on to a lot of anger and bitterness and insecurities from her own abusive childhood and she constantly projects those insecurities onto people she’s supposed to love and care for, including her children. She was apparently livid when she found out that oldest son had cultivated a relationship with his bio-dad, because her carefully-constructed narrative of “the father of my oldest children was a terrible person who never wanted his kids” was suddenly in serious jeopardy. DIL has overheard her shit-talking the situation to friends, and oldest son has gotten more than one earful of “how could you do this to meeeeee, I raised you and protected you” which is just...ARGH. (On the flip side, she apparently got this shocked Pikachu face when oldest son told her about me - a woman, in a loving, long-term relationship with the man that for years has been the subject of her “he divorced me because he isn’t into women” narrative. That gave me a really good laugh!)

Anyway, that is the saga of my bonus sons and their unfortunate alienation from my partner/their bio dad, and the reason I wasn’t able to help raise them in their teens (I so wish I could have). I love them and my DIL so much, more than I honestly ever thought possible to love kids who aren’t “mine”, but like...they are. They’re my kids as much as my bio kids are. I felt that way long before I met them. My bonus sons are part of my partner, part of his heart, so they became my kids in my head immediately, and DIL became my kid immediately too. So I love them. It’s automatic for me. And I love my grandbaby-on-the-way with all my heart too and I can’t wait to meet that sweet little bean.

#I'm not sure what to tag this because I don't want a bunch of strangers viewing it so I'm just gonna tag it like this #morrigan's heavy stuff

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