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rockislandadultreads · 1 year

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Book Recommendations: Let It Snow!

Best in Snow by David Rosenfelt

Christmas has come early to the town of Paterson, New Jersey, in the form of a snowstorm that dumps two feet of snow on the ground. Lawyer Andy Carpenter likes snow - white Christmas and all that - but it can cause problems for the walks he takes his dogs on every day.

When Andy’s golden retriever, Tara, goes to play in the snow and instead discovers a body, Andy ends up on the phone with the local newspaper editor. The murder victim is Mayor Alex Oliva, who had an infamous relationship with the newspaper. Last year a young reporter published an expose, and Oliva had him fired for libel. Now, the young reporter - and prime suspect - is in need of a lawyer. Andy agrees to take the case, though it’s not looking good this holiday season.

This is the 24th volume in the “Andy Carpenter” series.

Cover of Snow by Jenny Milchman

Waking up one wintry morning in her old farmhouse nestled in the Adirondack Mountains of New York, Nora Hamilton instantly knows that something is wrong. When her fog of sleep clears, she finds her world is suddenly, irretrievably shattered: Her husband, Brendan, has committed suicide.

The first few hours following Nora's devastating discovery pass for her in a blur of numbness and disbelief. Then, a disturbing awareness slowly settles in: Brendan left no note and gave no indication that he was contemplating taking his own life. Why would a rock-solid police officer with unwavering affection for his wife, job, and quaint hometown suddenly choose to end it all? Having spent a lifetime avoiding hard truths, Nora must now start facing them.

Unraveling her late husband's final days, Nora searches for an explanation - but finds a bewildering resistance from Brendan's best friend and partner, his fellow police officers, and his brittle mother. It quickly becomes clear to Nora that she is asking questions no one wants to answer. For beneath the soft cover of snow lies a powerful conspiracy that will stop at nothing to keep its presence unknown... and its darkest secrets hidden.

Dashing Through the Snow by Debbie Macomber

Ashley Davison, a graduate student in California, desperately wants to spend the holidays with her family in Seattle. Dashiell Sutherland, a former army intelligence officer, has a job interview in Seattle and must arrive by December 23. Though frantic to book a last-minute flight out of San Francisco, both are out of luck: Every flight is full, and there's only one rental car available. Ashley and Dash reluctantly decide to share the car, but neither anticipates the wild ride ahead.

At first they drive in silence, but forced into close quarters Ashley and Dash can't help but open up. Not only do they find they have a lot in common, but there's even a spark of romance in the air. Their feelings catch them off guard - never before has either been so excited about a first meeting. But the two are in for more twists and turns along the way as they rescue a lost puppy, run into petty thieves, and even get caught up in a case of mistaken identity. Though Ashley and Dash may never reach Seattle in time for Christmas, the season is still full of surprises - and their greatest wishes may yet come true.

Blood on Snow by Jo Nesbo

This is the story of Olav: an extremely talented “fixer” for one of Oslo’s most powerful crime bosses. But Olav is also an unusually complicated fixer. He has a capacity for love that is as far-reaching as is his gift for murder. He is our straightforward, calm-in-the-face-of-crisis narrator with a storyteller’s hypnotic knack for fantasy. He has an “innate talent for subordination” but running through his veins is a “virus” born of the power over life and death. And while his latest job puts him at the pinnacle of his trade, it may be mutating into his greatest mistake...

This is the first volume in the “Blood on Snow” series.

#fiction #letitsnow #winter reading #book recommendations #book recs #reading recommendations #reading recs #TBR pile #tbr #to read #library books #booklr #book tumblr

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wackybuddiemewbs · 3 years

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Buddie Moodboard - Emergency Room AU

Basically, if you throw every hospital show together, including Grey's Anatomy, ER, and whatever else, add a dash of Buddie and unresolved sexual tension, you end up... in this mad fictional hospital, I guess. With this AU on a rampage inside it. Anywho... have fun! Stay safe! Take your meds! Cheers!

While Dr. Evan "Buck" Buckley and Dr. Edmundo "Eddie" Diaz did not have the most ideal start in the ER (disagreements, misunderstandings, and a bomb in a patient's leg, you know, the usual), they have since become known throughout the hospital as the dream team of the Emergency Room.

Buck considers the hospital his home not just because he spends many hours there per week, but because the people he works with are family to him - and are actual family, in case of head nurse Maddie, who is his sister.

He is friends with Dr. Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, general surgeons, and Dr. Howard "Chimney" Han, who since specialized in cardiothoracic surgery. At the helm is chief physician and also general surgeon Dr. Robert "Bobby" Nash, who is one of the best physicians in L.A.

Buck proved himself as a capable trauma surgeon and since assumed his role in the ER with all of himself. Eddie fits right in as a former doctor for the Army, whose expertise is to be on point, quick, and perhaps most importantly: to never panic.

Working this kind of job is demanding, of course. Long hours, little sleep, and balancing that with social and family life are but few of the challenges they all face in their line of work. Buck especially is someone who has since immersed himself in his job. After all, he's single, and aside from his found family and his sister, has not too many attachments.

That is about to change when Buck treats a very kind Mexican woman who keeps gushing about her grandson, who is also working at the hospital. Because, as it turns out, that's Eddie's grandmother. And just like that, Buck finds out that Eddie has a son, is a single father trying to make ends meet, while also figuring out how to get proper medical care for Christopher.

Buck makes a decision on the spot to dive deep and support his partner in the ER - outside the ER. He "hooks" Eddie up with co-worker Carla Price, who knows exactly how to wrap authorities around the little finger. And while Eddie is reluctant at first to accept help from Buck, he finds himself reaffirmed in his initial belief in Buck to be better than the shitty attitude he used to give him when Eddie started at the ER.

Even better? Buck and Christopher get along more than great. Christopher loves spending time with Buck, and Buck loves Christopher, plain and simple. And for a while, Eddie thinks that he can finally relax, knowing that he has someone who has his back - and who trusts him to do the same.

Things turn out more complicated when Shannon makes a reappearance in Eddie's life - after she left, following major disagreements in the past. Sadly, their attempts to mend things are short-lived. Shannon wants to leave again, only to be run over by a car. And Eddie can't save her.

Lost in his and his son's grief, Eddie doesn't know what to do with himself. He picks up street fighting to cope with his anger, needing an outlet for all those emotions he has to keep in check for the sake of his son. But he soon comes to a turning point after an incident in the arena. While Bobby is none too pleased once he finds out, Eddie is glad that the chief offers help instead of throwing him out.

While he has yet to hear the end of it from Buck, he has to realize that even if Shannon is not around, he still has many people he can dare to rely on. That for them, he is enough, even when he's broken.

Crisis strikes again when Buck is caught up in a horrible car accident while in an ambulance car. PT is gruesome, but he pushes through, all the more thanks to the support of his friends, family, and Bobby in particular. Just when he's cleared to return to the ER, Buck receives another blow, starting to bleed while working on a patient and collapsing. As it turns out, the leg injury led to blood clots, which caused an embolism in turn.

And like that, Buck can't work as a trauma surgeon anymore, which is perhaps one of the worst things that could possibly have happened to Buck. He is petrified, bereft of what he considers his life's purpose. While everyone rallies to support him and help him come to terms with the new situation, Buck doesn't know what to do. He caves in at home - until Eddie winds up at his apartment with Christopher in tow. So long he is not working, he can at least babysit.

Buck takes Christopher to the pier, hoping to find some distraction. Though a tsunami is not the distraction he's been looking for, really. He manages to get himself and Chris to safety somehow, but he soon dives in to save people and tend to them - only for himself to be swept away by a second wave. Buck is desperate to find Christopher, whom he left with one of the people he pulled from the water. He has no way of telling whether Christopher was caught up in the wave as well. The boy might be dead, for all he knows.

And if that is the case, Eddie will never forgive him. So Buck keeps pushing himself past his limits to find Christopher and aid people along the way.

At the field hospital, Bobby and the other doctors are busy helping the patients pouring in. Eddie is in for the shock of his life when he recognizes a particular stitch on a patient's injury he knows is Buck's specialty. As he keeps asking around, he hears from many people who had their injuries treated by a young man fitting Buck's description.

But where is he? And where is Christopher?

Thankfully, Eddie is soon reunited with his son. Though Christopher is livid after he watched Buck be swept away, asking anyone he sees whether they have seen Buck. Hours pass until a worn-out trauma surgeon stumbles into the field hospital, still asking for Christopher on the verge of passing out.

Buck is taken back to the hospital for treatment and a fair amount of blood transfusions. By the time he comes back around, he goes straight to panic mode again, yelling for Christopher. Gladly, Eddie and Chris get through to him to snap him out of it - and the three take solace in the fact that they are finally reunited.

Buck and Eddie have a heart-to-heart later that night, wherein Buck admits that while he was desperate to find Christopher, he realized again that being a trauma surgeon is who he truly is. So unless he can return to active duty in the ER, he can't be a physician anymore. He can't work from behind a desk. That's just not him. Eddie tries to reason with him that he is more than his job, but Buck won't budge.

The surprise is all the greater when Hen delivers the news that the blood clots are no longer an issue, which is why Buck can return to being a doctor in the ER, once he recovered from the aftermath of the tsunami.

While Eddie is relieved that Buck gets to have his job back, he remains fearful for his friend. Because Buck still seems to think that he is nothing without his job, and Eddie doesn't know what to do to prove it to Buck. Yet anyway.

Buck is happy as a clam upon his return to the hospital. He is finally back with his family, and he doesn't have to visit that dark headspace again that he tried to stay clear from ever since he was a kid who was invisible to his parents.

He dares to think that his life is finally headed in the right direction. He dares to make plans for the future. And those plans involve Eddie and Christopher foremost. Because the matter of fact is this: Buck has since fallen in love with Eddie. He just has to figure out how and when to tell him that.

Though all of those plans may soon be crushed when the son of a former patient of Bobby's sets on a rampage in the hospital. He is shooting people as he goes to lure Bobby out, believing him responsible for his father's wrongdoings and death. When the attacker shoots Eddie, Buck finds himself on the brink of losing everything...

Find more moodboards here.

#buddie #buck x eddie #eddie x buck #evan buckley #eddie diaz #evan buck buckley #buddie moodboard #buddie au #moodboard #911 on fox

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mkstrigidae · 3 years

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Current WIPs and Fic Concepts

I promised I would do this yesterday, and then I forgot!!! (I was very sleep deprived). Anyways, here are a bunch of the WIP premises that I have in my 'unfinished drafts' folder. Most have at least a few pages written for them, but I love them all! ☺️💕

- A Santa Clarita Diet AU (Jonsa) Takes place in sunny southern California, where a shitty dinner at a mediocre restaurant turns into a huge problem for Jon and Sansa when Sansa's heart stops beating. Although she seems fine, Jon is flabbergasted several days later as he watches his wife- who alphabetizes their pantry and refuses to let anyone wear shoes in the house- rip the throat out of one of the sleazy new partners at their law firm, eating half of him before anyone processes what's going on. Hilarity ensues as Sansa's inhibitions and filter disappear, Arya ropes an extremely confused Gendry into helping figure out what the hell is going on just because he moderates the zombie forum on reddit, and Jon tries to deal with the fact that the woman he loves more than anything is now a humanitarian. He really could use a drink. (This one is actually mostly complete, but i need to refine a few things- i really love it. It's as gory and irreverent as the show, so viewer discretion advised, but it's a BLAST to write).

- A Thor/MCU AU (Jonsa, Steve Rogers/Sansa)- Asgardian prince Aegon is banished to Midgard after one too many arrogant decisions, and is promptly hit by a van containing Dr. Sansa Stark, Dr. Barristan Selmy, and Margaery Tyrell- two astrophysicists studying wormholes and Sansa's best friend and pseudo-intern. Marg yells at him, he yells back, Sansa tases him, and Barristan didn't sign up for the kind of heavy lifting that getting a 200+ pound slab of muscle into the back of a van takes. And then Aegon's younger brother, Jon, shows up, in the middle of an identity crisis because, apparently, he's adopted. He wasn't intending to stay, but he's rather drawn to Dr. Stark and her brilliance, and against her better judgement, she starts to trust him, and maybe even like him. This story is in about three parts so far- the first is based on 'Thor' and the second on 'The Avengers' and are fully Jonsa, and the third started as a family bonding story between the Stark kids and Tony (Ned and Tony are second cousins, and Ned was really supportive of Tony in rehab without expecting anything in return), and accidentally turned into a Steve Rogers/Sansa Stark story, which is a pairing i am HERE for. A lot of this one is written, but it needs some fill in before publishing, although it's one of my favorites that i've written to go back and actually read.

- A Star Wars AU (Jonsa) where Sansa and Arya are Alderaanian princesses who are off planet when Alderaan is destroyed- Sansa as a senator and Arya as a pilot, both working for the rebellion, and jon is a smuggler who does not know how all of these people got on his ship and why two princesses are sassing him. His copilot, Tormund (yes he's a wookie), thinks it is hilarious. I started this one just the other day, and it's already thirty pages long, most of them involving Sansa and Arya sassing people. Dany is a leader in the rebellion, Roose Bolton is the emperor, and Barbrey Dustin is a disgruntled former jedi trying to live in peace on a remote planet until another Stark crashes into her life and harangues her into teaching again.

- A witches/magic AU (Jonsa) where the Starks run an apothecary and spellcasting supplies shop. Jon had been completely in the dark about magic before his mother confessed to being born into a family of witches. He finds himself traveling to her hometown, trying to understand her world more clearly, and what it means for him. On the way, he develops something of a crush on the red-headed shop clerk who brews the best headache potions in town. Featuring lots of magical shenanigans, this is one of my favorites in the folder :)

- A 24 hour diner AU (Jonsa) where Jon is a local mob boss, and Sansa works the late shift at Seaworth's diner to buy textbooks for the PhD she's working on in botany. Sansa's running from memories, and Jon has a soft spot for the red-headed waitress who always remembers how he likes his coffee.

- An East of the Sun, West of the Moon AU!!! (Jonsa) This is one of my fav fairy tales, and of course i couldn't resist Jon as a direwolf striking a deal with the starks!

- A Roomates AU (Jonsa)- Arya, Jon, Tormund, and Sam have been renting the same house together off Winterfell's campus for years- but when Sam moves in with his girlfriend, they need one more person on the lease. Sansa, about to relocate to Winterfell for grad school, finds out that her boyfriend has been cheating on her and that her housing plans have fallen through, all on the same day. Needless to say, she's a bit upset when she calls Arya to relay the news. There's a simple solution here, if Arya and Tormund can stop teasing Jon about his crush for five minutes. (any excuse to write tormund and arya roasting jon, tbh).

- A Fae AU (Jonsa)- When Sansa, a baker living in the city, washes her face in an enchanted spring on a camping trip, she gains the sight as a result. Suddenly able to see the fae underworld all around her is disorienting and terrifying. Sansa tries to conceal it- afraid of what might happen if the fae around her know that she can see them- but slips up, and catches the attention of Jon Snow- one of the lords of the unseelie court.

- A nuclear winter wasteland AU (Jonsa)- (?? I don't even know how to describe this premise, haha) where the Starks are living and running the Free Winterfell settlement in Siberia after a worldwide nuclear meltdown. Before the fallout, Sansa was one of the world's preeminent researchers in plant genetics and pathology, and works at the settlement to create newer, disease and radiation resistant crops to distribute for free to other settlements, aiming to break up the monopoly that Lannister Corp has on the market. Jon is a scavenger, searching throughout Siberia for his sister Rhae who disappeared several years previously. When he runs across Arya Starkovna, helping her fight off another band of radiation ravaged scavengers is just instinct- he doesn't think twice about it. In thanks, she brings him to the Winterfell settlement, where her brother Robb offers Jon sanctuary and resources, in exchange for serving as a bodyguard for Sansa when she travels to other settlements. Sansa is not particularly thrilled by this arrangement, but given that multiple parties seem to want her dead, she doesn't have much of a choice but to accept his company.

- A reincarnation AU (Jonsa)- of sorts. Robb is an archaeologist who finds a strange set of runes at a site up north, and immediately calls in Jon Snow- a historian and expert in said ancient language, as well as an old university friend of Robb's. When he arrives though, Robb shows him their most valuable finds- two mysterious ice blocks, with what appear to be perfectly preserved bodies from over a thousand years ago. No one could ever have imagined that either of them were still alive, but when the ice melts, revealing two very alive girls, the entire crew is instantly buried in NDAs, and given an assignment from the Westerosi government to figure out what the hell was going on. Sansa and Arya wake up, extremely confused about the world they live in, trying to adapt and mourning all that they've lost, even as the people around them wear familiar faces.

- Soulmates AU (Jonsa)- (Yes, another one, I love this dumb trope) Trauma surgeon and medical resident Sansa Stark is having a very bad day, and ends up meeting her soulmate during what she thinks is a mugging gone wrong. Fortunately, he’s not the one mugging her, just an intervening bystander, but she ends up slightly shot nonetheless. Sansa’s fretting about bleeding on the upholstery in his car, but Jon is a bit more worried about her injuries than the blood stains. He’s a bit confused when she threatens him if he takes her to a specific hospital, nearly has a nervous breakdown when she insists on doing her own triage, and is very charmed when she insists on ice cream after taking pain meds at the hospital. On Sansa’s part, she’s a little less concerned about being shot, and a bit more concerned about whatever weird first impression she’s making to her soulmate while high as a kite on pain pills. (this one just needs some tweaking to be postable- I'm not sure if it's going to be a oneshot or a series, but i love what I have already)

- A Demon/Archivist AU (Jonsa)- where Sansa works in the university's historical archives in Oldtown, and is learning to restore old texts with her fellow student and friend, Alleras (Trans Sarella is an amazing concept). When Joffrey Baratheon shows up with a pile of old books from his family's library to donate, Sansa is eager to get away from his sleaze, and accidentally takes one of the books home with her in her rush to leave. Unbeknownst to her, it's more than it appears, and when she leaves it open overnight, she accidentally summons forth Jon- an ancient, powerful, and extremely annoyed demon who is under a curse, and now hers to command. As Jon and Sansa try to get used to this new normal, the Lannisters (unaware that Joffrey had donated the tome) try desperately to find the book and it's owner, wanting Jon's power for themselves, and putting Sansa in considerable danger unless she can figure out how to break Jon's curse. Fortunately, she's a pretty good researcher, even if Jon is initially a bit of a grump. (This is based on a total wish-fulfillment mary-sue type premise for something I wrote when I was thirteen, and I revisited it and wanted to see what it would look like if i took it very seriously, and i am really enjoying it so far. It's a love letter to the terrible, heartfelt writing i was doing in middle school that created the foundations for my writing today, and so much fun).

The one that I am MOST excited about though:

- A Pacific Rim AU!!!! (Ned/Cat, Gendrya, Braime, Sansa/Jon Umber)-Twins Sansa and Robb Stark have always been completely in tune with each other, and when your parents are Jaeger pilots and your mother invented the neural handshake, what option is there but the Jaeger academy? Sansa studies to be an engineer, but ends up copiloting the Jaeger 'Winter Wolf' with her twin brother, after they lose Ned Stark to cancer. When Robb is ripped out of the conn-pod and killed by a kaiju while he's still connected to Sansa, she barely manages to kill the creature before stumbling back to shore, traumatized, grieving, and swearing that she'll never pilot again.

Unfortunately, the Kaiju don't stop just because Sansa does, and when the end of the world is imminent, Marshall Catelyn Stark orders both her daughter and former pilot Jaime Lannister (who lost his twin and copilot, Cersei, several years previously) back to Hong Kong for one final stand. Forced to face both her demons and an irate Arya, furious that Sansa had abandoned the rest of them after Robb's death, Sansa and Arya have to figure out how to pilot Winter Wolf together before the apocalypse comes for them all.

Featuring Marshall Catelyn Stark (commander of the Hong Kong Shatterdome, inventor of the neural handshake, former Jaeger pilot, and BAMF), Sansa x Jon Umber (Yes i know it's a rare pair but i've always kind of loved the idea of them, even though we know so little about him), Kaiju parts dealer and smuggler Petyr Baelish, bickering kaiju biologist Dany and theoretical mathematician Jon Snow, LOCCENT officer Theon, lots of snark, lots of angst and heartfelt conversations, and a weird friendship between snarky-grieving-asshole Jaime Lannister and kind-quiet-grieving Sansa Stark, who are the only two people in the world who know what it's like to lose a copilot and a twin in the drift.

Thanks for reading guys!! There are more, but some of them I just don't know how to explain quite yet, haha. I'd love to hear what you guys think about these!

#my writing #fanfics #fanfic wip #jonsa #jonsa fic

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justicepursued · 3 years

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WHAT’S DIFFERENT? • Angela directly witnesses the death of her parents in an airstrike on her neighborhood. • What Angela does during the Crisis is not kept deliberately ambiguous: she works in an aid camp running errands for the doctors in exchange for food, safety, and shelter. As the situation grows desperate and the number of professional staff dwindle, she works alongside the camp’s doctors. Her belief that all life is precious is only reinforced by her experiences. • Angela was unwittingly conscripted into Overwatch at an early age per a secret program by the UN to recruit and train orphaned refugees in preparation for another Omnic Crisis. The children would be looked after in exchange for lifelong service to Overwatch. This program was shuttered upon the dissolution of Overwatch. As far as Angela is aware, she grew up a ward of the British state and her service to OW was entirely voluntary, as their offer was presented as a “choice.” • She is both a citizen of the UK and Switzerland, although as of OW’s dissolution, she has given up her cramped studio apartment in London and currently lives in an aid camp full-time. • Mercy is a character that Angela “plays” on the field of battle, and one that both she and OW’s public relations department had a hand in creating. Graceful, invulnerable, and nigh-angelic, Mercy always defers to her superiors and never questions the decisions of the organization she serves. Unlike in canon, Angela pre-Recall does not wish to be associated with Mercy at all. • Her experience with OW was more negative than in canon. Not only did her colleagues encourage her to directly join the conflict, but many of her coworkers stole her research and modified her inventions to hurt, rather than to heal. • She actively refuses to rejoin OW when Recall is issued, but “settles” on acting as a consultant for the reformed OW from afar, occasionally dropping in to patch up old friends. • Whether she rejoins post-Recall OW is ambiguous, although she still keeps the V/alkyrie swift response suit.

PHYSICAL HEADCANONS • Angela is 5′11 or 180 cm and lanky. • She’s got a smattering of sun spots on her nose from being out in the sun so much before her body got heavily modded. • Per canon, Angela wears glasses to read. I headcanon that she is mildly far-sighted---just enough to cause a headache if she were to read papers without eyewear. • Angela lost part of her right arm at 27, and wears a below-elbow mechanical prosthetic. The prosthetic is detachable, and she removes it at night, before showering, or before immersing herself in a mikveh. Shortly after losing her arm, she was offered a chance “regrow” the limb using experimental genetic tech developed by Blackwatch, but Angela refused on the principle of never having anything to do with “Moira’s department”. • During her tenure at OW, Angela was forced to cover her prosthesis with synthetic skin, as public relations believed Mercy showing a prosthesis would damage her “invincible, angel-like” reputation. Angela argued vociferously against the decision, believing Mercy’s use of a prosthetic would foster pride and positive self-esteem in disabled children that admired her persona. She eventually acquiesced to the decision when her superiors threatened to shutter funding for a major project. After the dissolution of OW, Angela no longer covers her prosthesis with synthetic skin. • Almost all of Angela’s spine is artificial, and most of the original cervical vertebrae are fitted with a cybernetic brace. She doesn’t like to talk about it. :^) • Angela tests out her nanite technology on herself first, always. She would rather shoulder the risk herself than potentially do harm to another living being. The wisest option it is not, but what’s a little cardiac arrest for the sake of progress? • While Angela does not “age”, the scars she had prior to applying advanced nanotechnology to her body are still present. • Nanites are not a cure-all; she is still capable of getting sick and of feeling aches and pains from old injuries. She’s a lil crusty about it. MENTAL HEALTH HEADCANONS • Angela has C/PTSD due to the trauma of spending part of her childhood in a warzone. • Her memory recall for the many traumatic events in her life fluctuate wildly; this ranges from being able to recount an incident with incredible clarity to being unable to remember the experience at all. Flashbacks are present but infrequent, with rumination taking up most of her mental energy. • Her C/PTSD effects her physical health, as she suffers from frequent migraines regardless of how “healthy” she is (quitting caffeine, sleeping 8 hours a night, hydration, etc.) • At times, Angela’s workaholic tendencies and mental illness impact her hygiene, with her struggling to shower, brush her hair, or do her laundry. • She avoids Zürich if she can help it; there are so many negative memories attached to her birthplace that she can’t ever see herself living there again. FAITH HEADCANONS • Even prior to her parents’ deaths, Angela understood the value of life, and the importance of t/ikkun olam. Painful as experiencing war and loss was, it only reinforced her convictions that life is precious, that preserving life is important beyond anything else, and that everyone has a duty to repair the world. Her motivation, her values, and her work cannot be disentangled from her faith. • I cannot emphasize this enough---the reason she joined OW in spite of their conflicting values was because she thought they were the best way to help as many people as possible. She questioned their methods and clashed with her superiors because she wanted the organization to do better for the sake of the world and everyone in it. This is intrinsically tied with her Jewishness!!!! • She keeps kosher. • Angela celebrated her b/at mitzvah shortly after she turned twenty, as she was not given the chance to go to H/ebrew school as a child. Her former thesis advisor and research partners were in attendance. • She is on the sour cream side of the debate. Accept no substitutes. If you eat latkes with ketchup she will never let that shit go. • P/urim is Angela’s favorite holiday. She loves the Book of Esther, she loves dressing up, she loves giving to others. It’s one of the few days out of the year where she smiles a lot. RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS • She has an intense dislike of Moira, believing that her research outright courts e/ugenicist ideology. Moira’s lack of ethics both infuriates and frightens Ziegler, who draws parallels to other notorious “scientists” who put their ambitions above basic human rights. • Angela is incredibly protective of all children, but most especially children who are labeled “prodigies”, loudly advocating for people to leave them alone and give them a break. OTHER HEADCANONS • Angela is terrible at “getting” current pop cultural references and memes, as she spent most of her early childhood disconnected from the internet, and her teen years in university. • Given how stressful her job is and the various traumas she has to juggle, Angela heavily relies on caffeine to get through her shifts. Drinking and smoking (the former sometimes to excess) are used to cope with stress.

#not a miracle worker » headcanon #tw ableism #tw parent death #tw addiction

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tabloidtoc · 3 years

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National Enquirer, December 28

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Ghislaine Maxwell scandal explodes

Page 2: George Clooney was rushed to the hospital after rapidly dropping 28 pounds to play an ailing astronomer in his latest movie The Midnight Sky and the harrowing incident has infuriated worried wife Amal Clooney -- George’s scare came when he was diagnosed with life-threatening pancreatitis days before he was scheduled to start filming on a glacier in Finland -- Amal was unhappy and angry that he put his health on the line for the role and she was also furious because this wasn’t the first time the father of her twins has been in harm’s way and she’s demanding he take better care of himself so he’ll be around to care for his kids

Page 3: Lori Loughlin’s deluded daughter Olivia Jade Giannulli is clueless over the college admissions scandal that landed her parents in jail and believes her own hype according to a body language expert -- in an interview on Jada Pinkett Smith’s Red Table Talk Olivia claimed she had no idea posing for pictures on a rowing machine to finagle a crew scholarship to the University of Southern California despite never having practiced the sport was deceitful but body language expert Susan Constantine said Olivia doesn’t appear to have any understanding of the consequences of her actions or those of mom Lori and dad Mossimo Giannulli -- after observing Olivia’s confession Constantine said she didn’t notice any deceptive indicators such as pauses in her speech or shrugging of her shoulders however she labeled Olivia completely unequivocally oblivious which she said made it challenging to judge Olivia’s truthfulness

Page 4: Lonely Diane Keaton is longing for love and she’s turned to former flame Jack Nicholson for help in landing a new guy -- Diane is truly desperate to find a man and she knows if there’s one person who can help her navigate the dating scene after all this time it’s Jack -- the Oscar-winning actress shocked the world when she recently admitted she hasn’t been on a date in 35 years and she made a joke of it but the pandemic has made her realize how lonely she really is -- Diane would never date Jack again but knows he has a lot of eligible friends who would fit her dating profile

* Dying Olivia Newton-John worries endlessly about her daughter Chloe and made a touching final request of close pal John Travolta: Please take care of Chloe after I’m gone -- Olivia’s concerns for Chloe spiked after she blasted the COVID-19 vaccine on social media writing that natural medicine is the party she belongs to -- Olivia has been battling stage 4 breast cancer while John lost his wife Kelly Preston to the same disease and John loves and admires Olivia for the way she’s battled this disease and she’s given him the hope and encouragement he needs -- now Chloe’s ongoing issues have pushed Olivia to beg John to pledge he’ll be there for her daughter because Chloe has spent over $450,000 on multiple plastic surgeries including breast enhancements and a nose job and lip enhancements and Botox and she’s also battled anorexia and depression which led to bouts with cocaine and alcohol addiction -- Olivia has always been deeply concerned about who would look out for Chloe if she wasn’t around and now that she can see the end is near she asked John to be that person; he never blinked an eye and said of course

Page 5: Ozzy Osbourne’s frail and feeble appearance has friends fearing for the rocker but he has no plans to abandon a 2022 comeback even if it kills him -- the 72-year-old singer has battled Parkinson’s disease and crippling nerve damage but has vowed he will die onstage -- nobody disputes he has the heart of a lion and it’s great to see him out and about again recording music and talking the good talk but ultimately Ozzy is a very sickly guy who needs to protect himself and not charge around trying to delude himself by living life at a pace that doesn’t make sense anymore

Page 6: Rattled reality star Kylie Jenner is living in fear after being terrorized by two crazed fans and is now spending $350,000 a month on a 25-person security detail -- Kylie filed court documents seeking a restraining order against Justin Bergquist who allegedly broke into her $36.5 million California home last month

Page 7: Lonely Ryan Seacrest may have nearly half a billion bucks in the bank but he’d trade in his riches for another shot at love -- he was so devastated by his breakup with on-again off-again galpal Shayna Taylor last summer he fears he may never find a woman to spend the rest of his life with and he now realizes her put his career before his personal life one too many times and may suffer for it forever -- Ryan’s recent health woes have been a wake-up call and forced him to understand the price he’s paying for taking his partners for granted for so long -- Ryan now realizes life is too short to go it alone and it’s finally dawned on him he’s not invincible and not so self-sufficient after all

* Miley Cyrus’ admission that she’s had a lot of FaceTime sex has left friends and advisers fearing she may be setting herself up for some unwanted exposure -- though Miley explained she’s turned to virtual hookups to avoid physical contact during the pandemic but she’s putting herself at an entirely different kind of risk and she’s setting herself up as a potential victim of revenge porn

Page 10: Hot Shots -- Brooke Burke showed off her toned figure in Malibu, Andrew Garfield looked bored on the NYC set of Tick Tick...Boom!, Busy Philipps cleaning, Audrina Patridge and her daughter Kirra on a Beverly Hills playdate

Page 11: Guy Fieri is eating up heaps of praise for handing out $500 grants to more than 43,000 restaurant workers across the nation -- he scrambled to raise over $21.5 million in seven weeks to help legions of unemployed restaurant laborers who have suffered financially due to the COVID-19 health and economic crisis -- through his new Restaurant Employee Relief Fund Guy personally buttonholed fat cats at cash-rich corporations such as PepsiCo and Uber Eats and Moet Hennessy USA to make donations -- he shows how he did it and shines a light on the industry’s continuing challenges in Restaurant Hustle 2020 a documentary he produced for the Food Network

* Garth Brooks and Trisha Yearwood are spreading yuletide cheer with their TV holiday special but they’re more interested in ringing cash registers than Christmas bells -- Garth and Trisha rake in $60 million a year from concert ticket sales and CD purchases and merchandising but the couple saw their cash flow slow during the pandemic -- they lost a bunch of money but they had the unique opportunity to do TV specials and grab a big chunk of it back -- while the $10 million they are pocketing for their TV specials won’t make up for what they would have netted on tour it was a sweet stocking stuffer and they both want to get back on the road and really rake it in but TV has made the wait a lot easier

Page 12: Straight Shuter -- With Beyonce and Taylor Swift facing off for Song of the Year at the upcoming Grammy Awards producers are scrambling to prevent another Kanye West explosion like what happened in 2009

* Killing off The Talk may be the only hope of saving Drew Barrymore’s tanking talk show

* The Real Housewives of New York are treating the first Black cast member Eboni K. Williams with kid gloves because no one wants to come across as racist

* Niecy Nash and Jessica Betts (picture)

Page 13: January Jones’ desperate bid for online attention has pals concerned she may be cracking up -- her red-hot career appears to have cooled since Mad Men ended in 2015 and January is dying to land another plum part like Betty Draper but she’s going about it the wrong way -- she’s been posting sexy bikini pictures and leggy dance numbers on Instagram but that’s not the way to catch the eye of casting directors especially with so few shows in production during the COVID-19 lockdown

* Caitlyn Jenner has reached out to trans actor Elliot Page offering to be his big sister in an opportunistic PR ploy -- while Caitlyn was one of many trans celebs including Jazz Jennings and Geena Rocero to offer Elliot congratulations and support, Caitlyn viewed the announcement as a new opportunity to leap back into the limelight and she believes that by aligning herself with Elliot she can regain her status as an activist and the symbol of transgender rights in Hollywood -- Elliot is happy to listen to Caitlyn’s advice but he’s been navigating his gender issues for years and doesn’t need guidance and he’s not going to be rude but he doesn’t need the help

Page 14: Crime

Page 15: A never-before-heard audio recording is of iconic soul singer James Brown’s wish to leave his $100 million fortune to educate poor children -- in the garbled 1999 recording the singer who died suddenly in 2006 called the creation of his I Feel Good foundation his lasting legacy but his precious foundation has not seen a dime because his fortune has remained tied up in court since his death which is the subject of an investigation by the Fulton County, Georgia District Attorney’s office after allegations surfaced that Brown might have been poisoned by someone after his money

Page 16: American Life

Page 17: What Shocked and Rocked in 2020 -- the best scoops and stories of the year

Page 25: Fired Hillsong Church pastor Carl Lentz was so starstruck by his celebrity parishioners he believed he was a star himself and his ego fueled his shocking fall from grace and now he’s getting mental health treatment after being accused of cheating on his wife and getting sacked for moral failures -- Carl tended the trendy megachurch’s New York City flock and regularly rubbed shoulders with celebs including NBA star Kevin Durant and singer Selena Gomez and even once invited Justin Bieber to live with him before being booted by bigwigs but now he’s said to be getting help at an outpatient facility specializing in depression and pastoral burnout but cunning Carl may have made the move simply to revamp his wrecked reputation

Page 26: Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are heading to couples therapy in a desperate bid to stay together because their marriage is hanging by a thread -- the pair are at each other’s throats as they struggle to adjust to their new life in America -- Harry’s gone from being excited about the move to feeling tortured and it’s like he swapped his royal prison in Britain for a new hell in a $14 million California mansion and he fears he’s made a terrible mistake but Meghan’s ordering him to man up and grab this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to make millions away from the monarchy’s suffocating shadow -- the fighting came to a head before the holidays when Harry was feeling especially homesick and guilty about abandoning his family especially his brother Prince William and his grandmother Queen Elizabeth -- adding to their troubles Meghan seems hellbent on staying in the public eye during the pandemic and she masterminded their personal video calls to charities in London and the U.S. and the secret deliveries of meals to the needy but then she made them public and the truth is it’s The Meghan Show now and Harry’s just the side act

Page 27: A charming Chinese spy bedded two Midwestern mayors and courted other clueless politicians to weasel her way into U.S. government circles -- Chinese national Christina Fang also known as Fang Fang, reportedly entered the U.S. as a college student in 2011

Page 31: Candice Bergen moaned that at the age of 74 she’s a wreck and that she has a wattle -- Candice admitted to having her eyes done while filming the Murphy Brown reboot because they were very hooded and as for today she knows she should have injections because she has deep lines along her lip but she can’t take the pain

* Rachael Ray lost her New York home to a blazing inferno but her holidays were salvaged by the warmth of community spirit -- following the devastating fire she and her husband moved into the property’s guesthouse and in a clip on The Rachael Ray Show the emotional host showed off her festively decorated digs and gushed she didn’t know where she’d be without friends and a community and people so dear to her that helped her bring Christmas to life even when you’re not at home

Page 32: Health Watch -- blood test predicts Alzheimer’s

Page 34: Longtime lovebirds Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell are hoping to make a movie with their whole family -- the star-studded cast would include Goldie’s kids Kate Hudson and Oliver Hudson and the couple’s son Wyatt Russell -- as for filming with the entire gang Goldie gushed that they have thought about it and she’d love to do something with her kids and the grandchildren too

* Hollywood Hookups -- Kristin Cavallari and Jeff Dye heating up, Malik Beasley and Larsa Pippen dating but Malik’s wife Montana Yao filed for divorce, Chrishell Stause and Keo Motsepe dating

Page 36: Infamous Hollywood hotel Chateau Marmont has a storied history of sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll ever since it opened its doors in 1929 and nearly a century later it hasn’t been tamed -- even during the pandemic the majestic hotel is wild with drunks, overdoses and luckily averted suicide attempts and according to 911 records the debauched celebrity haunt is filled with people having breakdowns -- the Chateau’s crazy days and nights are legendary: it’s where John Belushi died in one of the bungalows in 1982 from a deadly cocaine-heroin concoction

Page 38: One of the most iconic images from the James Bond films which is a handgun used by Sean Connery in Dr. No has sold for $256,000 at auction in Beverly Hills -- the gun is a deactivated semi-automatic Walther PP pistol -- the winning bidder who asked to remain anonymous is an American who’s seen every James Bond film with his children -- a helmet created for Tom Cruise in Top Gun also sold at the auction for $108,000 while a sword used by Bruce Willis in Pulp Fiction sold for $35,200

* Dolly Parton has one major thing left on her bucket list which is she wants to see Beyonce sing Jolene one of the country star’s signature songs -- Jolene has been recorded more than any other song Dolly has ever written but that isn’t enough for her because she also wants to see it updated by one of the top female stars of a new generation -- it has been recorded worldwide over 400 times in lots of different languages but nobody’s ever had a really big hit record on it and Dolly always hoped somebody might do it someday by someone like Beyonce

* Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson has wrestled his way into the alcohol market with his own tequila brand and lifted it into first place as the most successful spirit launch in history and he’s even on track to double George Clooney’s first-year launch -- Dwayne is expected to move more than 300,000 cases of small-batch Teremana Tequila in its first year of trading

Page 40: Smitten singer Rihanna has fallen hard for A$AP Rocky but friends fear the playboy rapper will leave her broken-hearted -- Rocky is a charming guy but he also has a love ‘em and leave ‘em reputation and everyone’s concerned she’s more into him than he is into her -- Rihanna’s desperate to meet a man she can see herself with for the rest of her life and she believes Rocky might be the one but everybody thinks she’s rushing into things with Rocky -- Rocky is not interested in a long-term romance and Rihanna shouldn’t be thinking of this as more than a port in the storm

* Lizzo is livin’ large and she’s showing every inch of her jiggles and folds on TikTok -- the body-positivity enthusiast wore a white bikini for an all-angles video in which she amply demonstrated the tricks models and celebs use to look slimmer -- she bared her belly and back and legs and sometimes jiggled her thighs or grabbed a hunk of herself to prove there’s more to luscious ladies than meets the eye and wrote, “Wild to see the body positive movement come so far. Proud of the big girls who gave it wings.”

Page 42: Red Carpet -- The Crown stars -- Claire Foy, Emma Corrin, Gillian Anderson, Vanessa Kirby, Erin Doherty

Page 47: Odd List -- baseball fan Darren Johnson hatched an unusual idea for his new chicken coop making it a model of Houston’s former Eighth Wonder of the World The Astrodome

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arethereanyoriginalusernames · 3 years

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Spooky babbles about RENT (the Broadway Musical (about assholes ))

We all have our guilty pleasures, or at least enjoy things that we acknowledge are bad. I’m sure that you and I can both name examples of these things specific to us.

It’s also likely that, like me, when someone makes a compelling video essay about something that you’ve never seen, that you agree with that person. Only to become exposed to more of it, and then you realize that “hey some of this is pretty good”, but then you become super conflicted bc you know that it’s bad, but you still enjoy aspects about it.....

I’m just making this about me, aren’t I? Welph, let’s do this proper and make another essay, bc I totally have time, and I totally won’t regret this later when I have a million things to do:)

.... oh quarantine, what have you done to me~?

... so, Lindsey Ellis. I consume her content regularly, and I would absolutely say that she’s probably one of the best YouTubers nowadays. You might remember her from her nostalgia chick days, but since distancing herself from that character, she makes video essays on several topics, a lot of them pertaining to popular shows and stories. If you write stories or enjoy creating characters and whatnot, I would make her channel a must to check out.

She also has a podcast on Spotify called “Musicalsplaining”, which I would also recommend you check out. It’s a podcast she does with her friend Kaveh, who dislikes musicals. They both watch a musical, and have a discussion over it, and it can get pretty funny due to their discussions being unscripted banter between two buds stuck in quarantine.

Lindsey has done both a video on a musical called RENT, and she and Kaveh covered it in their podcast. If you want a more funny coverage of it, I’d say listen to the podcast, as both Lindsey and Kaveh basically bond over their mutual rage, which is honestly beautiful. For a more in depth look at how RENT misrepresents the AIDs crisis, the lgbt+ community, and is just a bad story in general, check out her video essay on RENT on YouTube.

As you can probably guess, I’ve listened to both the video and the podcast. At least 8 times each (seriously, they’re really good). Now, I had never watched Rent before, nor had I listened to the soundtrack. The most I did was read the synopsis on Wikipedia. And I still haven’t watched the musical... but I currently have over half the soundtrack downloaded on Spotify.

So.... yeah. And after listening to the soundtrack, I have some thoughts. I don’t disagree with Lindsey’s take on Rent, honestly I still 100% agree with everything that she said, but now... something’s different. I see potential in Rent, and I see some gold hidden in what is basically a steaming pile of narcissism masked as “being artistic”. And that actually makes Rent that much more frustrating for me.

I’ll assume that despite my recommendations, you might not feel like listening to Lindsey’s coverage of Rent. While I still recommend you do so, since she explains the issues better than I ever could, I’ll do my best to give you as brief of an explanation as I can.

Rent is a rock musical loosely based on the opera La Boheme. It follows a group of “struggling artists” attempting to survive in New York during the AIDs/ HIV crisis. It’s one of the first popular Broadway musicals that featured LGBT+ characters, and it was rather successful when it was a new thing. Then years past, people forgot about it, then a terrible movie adaptation was made. Said movie caused a lot of people to realize that maybe Rent wasn’t actually that good.

The heroes of our story are as follows.

We have Roger, one of the more decent people here (which isn’t saying much), who’s a former drug user who’s trying to stay clean from drugs. He lost his last girlfriend to suicide, and he’s currently dying from AIDs. He’s trying to write one great song before he dies so he can leave some kind of legacy.

Mark is a wannabe filmmaker who exploits people’s misfortune for his own passion project (without their consent). He likes to film and romanticize the plight of the homeless while doing fuck all to help. He’s struggling financially, so he considers it fair to not pay for anything bc he’s an artist and being poor is admirable or something. Also, not only is he a privileged white kid with rich parents who could help him, but he refuses to contact them, he also quits a decent job bc he can’t express himself artistically. I wish I was kidding.

Mimi is a stripper with a drug addiction and AIDs. She’s also the love interest for Roger. While logically, it’d be a bad idea for Roger, someone who is trying to be clean of drugs, to not get involved with Mimi, the story wouldn’t have you believe that. She tries to get him to do drugs with her and “live”, and the story tries to do a thing by having her fake die by aids, only to be revived and cured by Roger singing. I wish I was kidding.

Maureen is a narcissist who gaslights her partners, has a weird job as a performance artist, and is bisexual so of course she has to be super slutty and flirtatious, and dance around the idea of cheating on her gf, Joanne, who’s this super smart, serious gal who leads protests for social justice.

Collins and Angel are the local maybe adora-gays, maybe adorable trans x cis person couple. (It depends on the adaptation and audience interpretation whether Angel is a drag queen or trans). Angel takes in an ailing Collins to live with her, and she also gets super rich by killing a dog. Collins is an anarchist currently fighting the aids epidemic. They’re a cute couple, but then Angel dies of aids bc we need a sad, and then Collins starts robbing atms in memory of his dead lover. I wish I was kidding.

Yes, I skipped over some stuff, but kids, this is a Tumblr post, and we’re already dealing with an essay here. And Wikipedia is right there. Basically, all you need to know is that Rent is a musical about assholes justifying their behaviour by being like “oh, but we’re artists!!!”. Oh yeah, and there’s also a guy called Benny who’s a former friend, and the only decent person here despite being portrayed as a bad dude, but I honestly don’t think I can remember anything beyond that for the life of me.

So, clearly Rent isn’t perfect. But, it’s hard to deny its impact. After all, it featured a main cast where half of the characters are POC and LGBT+ . Mind you, it was written by a straight man who “knew some gay people”. But, at the time, it was at least better than nothing.

And one aspect of Rent that people still appreciate to this day are the songs. And honestly? The majority of it is pretty great. A lot of people might recognize Take Me as I Am and Seasons of Love, two iconic songs brought to this world by Rent. And the rest of the soundtrack is great.... well, it’s better if you can make yourself forget the context of the songs, and look over some poorly aged lyrics. Light My Candle and I’ll Cover You are pretty cute songs, Goodbye Love has some great vocals, Another Day fucking slaps, and la Vie Boheme is a fun listen despite some weird lyrics.

While listening to the soundtrack, I realized something. A lot of these songs are great.... out of context. Another Day is great, until you remember that Roger is being portrayed as unwilling to live life bc he’s trying to stay clean of drugs. Yes, he likes Mimi, but there’s a pretty legitimate reason why he shouldn’t. And yet he’s in the wrong for... being concerned about his health? La Vie Boheme is soured when you remember that the cast is doing this entire performance after the restaurant owner begs them “no, not tonight, please!” Like, the guy’s doing his job and trying to run a business, but fuck him, let’s piss off people who don’t agree with us! And Take Me Or Leave Me is basically Maureen accusing Joanne of being too controlling and not accepting, when Joanne is taking issue with how Maureen is flirting with others constantly and is dancing around the line of being unfaithful. And Maureen’s logic is, I shit you not, “oh, but I just can’t resist temptation, and I’m attractive, and as long as I’m in your bed and not someone else’s, it’s ok!”

This... made me think. Maybe all Rent needs is a rewrite. An update. Something like Rent can probably work, but the misunderstanding of how poverty, aids, and societal unfairness works ultimately drags it down. Most of all, I think that Rent is an example of how a Broadway show can have great music, but that’s only part of it. If you fail in story and characters, the music won’t save you.

Let me know what you guys think about this.

I apologize for wasting your time,

- Spooky

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fly-pow-bye · 4 years

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What’s Airing On Cartoon Network? (May 2020)

Yeah, sorry I forgot about all of this. All of the new episodes this month after the break.

Bakugan Battle Planet

May 3rd:

Haunted House/Two of a Kind - Haunted House: Rumor has it that there's a haunted building in Los Volmos, and the Awesome Brawlers are on the case! Who doesn't like a good ghost hunt, plus capturing a ghost on camera should make Awesome Brawlers' next video a huge success!/Two of a Kind: Veronica Venegas is doing a special report on the Awesome brawlers own: Lightening! The special report takes a back seat when Lightening is challenged to a brawl. Lightening uses this brawl the perfect opportunity to rollout his new Bakugan partner: Tretorous. (6:30 AM)

May 17th:

Magnus P.I., Parts 1 & 2 - There's a been a string of thefts and each one has involved a Bakugan. The AAAnimus security force have decided the only brawler who could be responsible is: Magnus. The shock of this accusation sets Magnus off to takes justice in his own hands and go after the thief himself./Magnus foils the latest burglary attempt by the phantom thief, and in doing so, discovers the brawler partners with a golden Bakugan. Magnus is now more interested in a brawl, than stopping any crime. (6:30 AM)

May 24th:

Awesome Brawlers Training Camp, Parts 1 & 2 - The Awesome Brawlers head to a training facility owned by Kasami International to prepare for the Bakugan Battle League - Los Volmos. But once the gang figures out they will all be competing against each other for the same title, the "team building" retreat doesn't quite go as planned./Agit turns up at the Kasami training facility and fits right in with the Awesome brawlers. This is a lifestyle that he can get used to, but it becomes apparent Agit is torn between a life as a phantom thief and life as a brawler. (6:30 AM)

May 31st:

The Bakugan Battle League Begins/Riot vs. Ajit - The Bakugan Battle League Begins: The qualifying rounds for the Bakugan Battle league are taking place all around Los Volmos. The Awesome Brawlers all make it through into the tournament without a hitch, that is all but Dan. Dan faces an old rival in Trey, who's back with a few tricks up his sleeve./Riot vs. Ajit: The Bakugan battle league is finally here and 16 brawlers have qualified to enter including all the Awesome Brawlers. The first round will feature a brawl between China Riot and the golden Bakugan brawler, Agit! (6:30 AM)

Craig of the Creek

May 2nd:

The Cardboard Identity - Craig and his friends stumble upon a mysterious bunker made of cardboard beneath the Creek. (9:00 AM)

Ancients of the Creek - Craig, Kelsey and JP discover an ancient fort that belonged to the first kids in the Creek. (9:15 AM)

May 9th:

Mortimor to the Rescue - When Craig, Kelsey and JP get stranded in murky water, it's up to Mortimor to save the day! (9:00 AM)

Secret in a Bottle - Craig needs to get a secret off his chest, so he pays a visit to the Keeper of Secrets in the Creek. (9:15 AM)

May 16th:

Trading Day - After Craig accidentally destroys a shipment of rare Chocorolls at the Trading Tree, Kit makes him work off his debt by running her trades throughout the Creek! (9:00 AM)

Crisis at Elder Rock - Tragedy strikes the Creek when the Elders get trapped under Elder Rock, and it's up to Craig, Kelsey and JP to rescue them. (9:15 AM)

May 23rd:

Kelsey the Worthy - When Kelsey demolishes a wall at Craig's house, her father takes away her sword. So she enlists Craig and JP to help prove to her father that she's still worthy. (9:00 AM)

The End Was Here - Craig tries to figure out how an ancient war that decimated the Creek began in hopes of stopping history from repeating itself. (9:15 AM)

DC Super Hero Girls

May 3rd:

#CrashCourse - When a high-speed chase breaks out during her driver's test, Diana Prince's desire to fight evil clashes with her desire to undergo a World of Man teenage rite of passage, getting her license. (4:00 PM)

Power Players

May 3rd:

Winner Takes All - After months of training for Luchador Day, Axel needs Masko to coach him against a pair of uninvited competitors - Madcap and Dynamo! (7:30 AM)

Prepare for the Worst - Axel and Bobbie Blobby skip out on Sarge's disaster-prep drills, leaving enough of a gap in the team's defenses for a crow to swoop in and snatch Sarge! Feeling responsible, Axel leads the team on a search-and-rescue mission. (7:45 AM)

May 17th:

Stuck on You - Tired of Axel and the team taking him for granted, Masko tries to get kidnapped and ends up stuck to Dynamo, who's less than enthused with his rubbery new sidekick. (7:30 AM)

Opposites Attract - Claiming he's good at heart, Dynamo convinces Axel and the team to help him find a battery that can power his centrifuge and free him from Madtrap's control - but Bobbie Blobby isn't buying the baddie's story. (7:45 AM)

May 24th:

The Thing in the Wall - When Axel and the team accuse Galileo of stealing their possessions, the lizard must hunt down the true culprit - a mysterious creature behind the wall - to prove his innocence. (7:30 AM)

Madtrap - Madcap and Princess SugarSalt trap Axel and the team inside a Minergy-powered labyrinth that attacks them with their greatest fears, forcing them to work together and escape as a unit. (7:45 AM)

May 31st:

To Tame the Perilous Skies! - With Axel's drone-wing broken, the team must find another way to stop Madcap and his minions as they take to the skies in toy airplanes for an aerial assault on the city park. (7:30 AM)

Four Color Fallout - Axel, Galileo, and Sarge get Minergy-transported by Madcap into the pages of Axel's favorite comic book, the hero of which turns out not to be so cool after all. (7:45 AM)

Teen Titans Go!

May 25th:

Justice League's Next Top Talent Idol Star: Justice League Edition - The Justice League holds yet another talent competition, only this time they're facing off against the Titans. In order to be the most talented superhero team in the DC universe, Robin and Beast Boy must work together on a jazz performance. (6:00 PM)

ThunderCats Roar

Sorry, no descriptions for the last two episodes yet. In fact, the only reason why there’s descriptions at all is because most of these were See It Firsts, as is tradition for ThunderCats Roar.

May 2nd:

Summer Fun Day - The Thundercats are exhausted from fighting bad guys all the time so Lion-O suggests they spend a relaxing summer fun day at the beach, with no fighting! Unfortunately the beach is home to the Crabmen, giant, clawed humanoids that fight anyone who steps on their sand! Looks like summer fun day might involve some fighting! (10:30 AM)

Safari Joe - While minding her own business, Cheetara is caught in a trap set by Safari Joe, the famously annoying hunter! After escaping, she rallies the other ThunderCats to help her stop Joe once and for all, by turning the tables and capturing him! (10:45 AM)

May 9th:

Ratar-O - The ThunderCats have gotten so good at defeating the Mutants of Plun-Darr that it's basically become routine. That all changes with the arrival of the Mutants' old leader: Ratar-O, wielder of the Sword of Plun-Darr! Uh-oh! (10:30 AM)

Prince Starling's Quest - Lion-O is happily playing with Snarf in their "Frolicking Field" and doesn't have a care in the world, unfortunately he's accidentally stomping all over the miniature village of the Micrits! The tiny people want to defeat the "giant orange monster" but such a quest would require a brave hero. Luckily, the Micrits have such a hero: Prince Starling! Now, let us the tell you the epic tale of Prince Starling as he journeys to find the fountain of growth and defeat the wicked Lion-O, who has no idea any of this is going on! (10:45 AM)

May 16th:

Lion-S - Lion-O and the other ThunderCats are thrilled to meet a brand new Thunderian: Lion-S! She's cool, good at fighting robots and, most importantly, thinks Lion-O and his Sword of Omens are really neat and interesting! Looks like the ThunderCats have a new best friend! Maybe even, a new ThunderCat????? (10:30 AM)

Snarf's Day Off (10:45 AM)

May 23rd:

Mumm-Ra of Plun-darr (10:30 AM, half hour special!)

Total Dramarama

Ditto for this show.

May 2nd:

Beth and the Beanstalk - After having a chocolate bar confiscated by Chef, Beth finds herself in a parallel giant world and aims to get back her now giant chocolate bar. (10:00 AM)

Pinata Regatta - Izzy can't bring herself to smash a Pinata during the class' Cinco De Mayo celebrations. But when that unsmashed Pinata comes to life and spawns an evil Pinata Army, it's batter up. (10:15 AM)

May 9th:

A Dame-gerous Game - After Leshawna, Bridgette, Owen and Cody win a Hide & Seek competition, they're trapped on a private island by a jealous former champion and forced to play for their freedom. (10:00 AM)

Royal Flush - When the other kids fear Harold has accidentally flushed himself down Chef's fancy new toilet, they travel into the sewer on a rescue mission. But will they find Harold before the mythical Alligator King traps them underground forever? (10:15 AM)

May 16th:

Total Eclipse of the Fart (10:00 AM)

May 23rd:

Dissing Cousins (10:00 AM, half hour special!)

Transformers Cyberverse

...and ditto here, too!

May 3rd:

Enemy Line - While Optimus struggles to be a leader in peace-time, Bumblebee undertakes a daring mission into Decepticon territory. (7:00 AM)

May 17th:

Thunderhowl - Bumblebee and Chromia travel to Crystal City to recover one of Windblade's psychic shards and encounter a long-lost bot. (7:00 AM)

Wild Wild Wheel - A dangerous lone gunslinger named WildWheel returns to Cybertron looking for Optimus Prime. (7:15 AM)

May 24th:

Alien Hunt! With Meteorfire and Cosmos - Bumblebee enlists washed-up TV show host Meteorfire to help him find another of Windblade's psychic shards on Luna-3. (7:00 AM)

Journey to the Valley of Repugnus - Bumblebee and Grimlock are separated as they search the depths of Cybertron for another of Windblade's psychic shards, encountering the Monsterbots and the Energon Masters. (7:15 AM)

May 31st:

Rack N' Ruin N' Ratchet (7:00 AM)

Dweller in the Depths (7:15 AM)

Victor and Valentino

May 2nd:

My Fair Achi - V&V enter Achi in a dog show competition to win a golden trophy, but their overbearing ways drive Achi to the edge. (9:30 AM)

Oddities - When a mysterious carnival barker fuses V&V together, they must find a way to come unstuck. (9:45 AM)

May 9th:

I.....am Vampier - When Vic enters the Monte Macabre film festival, he gets insecure about his artistic vision and decides to copy the work of others, but ultimately learns that staying true to yourself is what's most important. (9:30 AM)

Victor the Predictor - When Victor becomes convinced he has a special talent as a psychic, he decides to use his new mental abilities to counsel those around him - until one piece of advice goes too far. (9:45 AM)

May 16th:

Kindred Spirits - When Val becomes friends with the ghost of a silent film star, their friendship turns out to have dire consequences. (9:30 AM)

Decoding Valentino - When Val goes on an adventure with Isabella to decode an ancient language, he has to come to terms with the fact that Isabella is smarter in order to save himself. (9:45 AM)

May 23rd:

Journey to Maíz Mountain - When Victor and Valentino destroy Monte Macabre's corn supply, they journey to Maíz Mountain with Sal to replace it. But in order to get the corn, they must shrink down to the size of ants and embark on a mythical adventure that they'll never forget! (9:30 AM, half hour special!)

#bakugan #bakugan battle planet #craig of the creek #dc super hero girls #power players #teen titans go #thundercats roar #total dramarama #transformers #transformers cyberverse #victor and valentino #fpb news #cartoon network

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curiousdamage · 4 years

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Drabble post!

# 22: “This isn’t goodbye.”

For @missviolethunter Sorry it took so long!

Fandom: Cobra Kai- Ten Minutes

Pairing: Robby/Soapy

Warning: Very LaRusso negative. Robby is feeling a way about how Daniel treated him in the last episode. This ficlet is part of a future chapter.

Robby looked down at Sophie’s fingers intertwined with his, then back out at the ocean waves. It had been six months since the fight at West Valley, six months since Miguel had gone over that rail. Six months since life as he knew it had ended.

In those six months, he’d changed, really changed, not just the superficial changes he’d made while working for Mr. LaRusso. Then he’d just changed from wanting to please his friends to wanting to please Mr. LaRusso. That Daniel was a better person than Trey and Cruz was the only reason he’d replaced stealing and selling Molly for hard work, karate, and trying to do the right thing.

Yes, doing the right thing was better than what he had been doing to survive and he hadn’t gone back to that when his mom had taken off with Rick or whatever his name was. Though, he wasn’t sure how much of that was that he wanted to be a better person or that he was afraid of losing Daniel’s approval.

Pastor Bobby and even his Dad had told him that ultimately it was he that decided not to do that, not Daniel instructing him not to, but he hadn’t admitted to them that the reason he’d been so desperate to keep Daniel’s approval was that his hatred and anger for Johnny made it fed his own. It was easier to blame Johnny for Miguel’s behavior at the All Valley than admit that it probably had more to do with the fact that he had been hitting on Sam at that party, when Daniel was reiterating that Cobra Kai was a cheaters nearly daily.

He’d only seen his former Sensei and mentor once in the last six months, when Daniel had shown up at his first hearing to say that yes, he had taught Robby karate but what he had done to Miguel wasn’t the self-defense discipline Miyagi Do taught.

Whatever. He’d always known that their relationship had been built on Daniel’s midlife crisis, his teenage rebellion, and their mutual hatred for Johnny, but it still stung to hear Daniel disavow him like that. As though his hard work and all that he'd done meant nothing because he was a Lawrence and therefore, irredeemable.

In a moment, he'd lost everything. Broken, beaten, and alone, he'd ran, not knowing what else to do. Away from the life he'd built but as he was learning, to the life he needed.

It was just as well that life didn't include the LaRusso, he was finding it very hard to hold on to any of his own resentment for his father as the villains in Daniel's life were become heroes in his.

Mr. Jimmy had stood up for him in court, not by denying his criminal past as the first lawyer Sid had hired tried to do, but contrasting it to the changes he'd made over the last year to show that putting him back in juvenile detention would only make him a statistic whereas releasing to Johnny and having him do community service and seek counseling would help him become a better person. He was sure that it had only flown because Miguel had been given a positive prognosis, but it was still more than anyone else had done for him before.

Pastor Bobby had been awesome, helping him find his dad that first day, going to every court appearance with Johnny and him, visiting him every day that one awful week he'd spent in juvenile detention, even working with the court to set up an acceptable community service program, getting him into his church's private school since he couldn’t go back to West Valley, and finding a decent counselor that Johnny could afford.

And his Dad. His Dad had been awesome in the past few months. He’d stopped drinking, gotten into AA, and had managed to be there for both he and Miguel without making either of them feel neglected or that they were being pitted against each other. He was sure that hadn’t been easy. He’d even helped Shannon when she’d gotten out of rehab with no place to live.

Then there was Sophie. She’d been by his side from his first day of community service when Pastor Brown had led him over to her and told her to show him how to work in the food pantry.

“Sure. We have food and we give it to people who don’t. It’s pretty much that simple,” she smiled.

“Yeah, right,” he’d scoffed. He and Shannon had gone to a few food banks over the years and it was never that easy. It was a long, drawn-out, humiliating process.

“Well, I mean, we do have some guidelines on how much food they get depending on the size of their family, but otherwise, that’s it,” she shrugged. “Dad says it’s hard enough to ask for help without having to prove just how badly you need it,” she replied.

He'd been struck by how friendly and genuinely nice she'd been to the people who came in, keeping up a steady stream of chatter as they let them through the warehouse, picking out food. Not to mention it had kept him from having to talk which was fine with him.

She never brought up the fight unless he did first and she never made him feel like criminal, or worse, over it. She’d been by his side as much as the adults had. She was the first friend he’d had in a long time who hadn’t wanted something from him. Trey and Cruz had wanted a partner in crime, Demetri had wanted protection at first, his North Hills friends had wanted ease access to pills, and Sam had wanted a rebound guy. Whether she’d chosen him due to proximity of living in her house and the time at the dojo, or because he would be the best revenge on Miguel, he didn’t know. He was, however, certain she hadn’t liked him just for him, himself. She’d never tried to talk to him about anything more serious than last names, not even after his mom took off then came back only to go to rehab. It was all about distracting her from wanting Miguel. He knew that now. Maybe he wasn’t being fair, maybe he didn’t have the whole story but that’s how it felt to him.

He looked at Sophie again. He liked her. The truth was that he’d been crazy about her for months, but she was his only friend and he been scared to lose that if she didn’t like him that way. Besides, even if he believed what his dad said, that he didn’t have to keep punishing himself for what happened by making himself miserable, there was a very real chance that the state of California was going to hand out a very real punishment. It wasn’t fair to her to start a relationship knowing there was a chance he was going to Juvenile Detention until he was twenty-one.

Tomorrow was the day. His last court hearing. The day the judge would decide if he’d shown ‘enough commitment to improving himself’ to be allowed to stay on probation or if he’d have to be locked up until he was old enough to drink. He knew what he’d choose if he was in the judge’s shoes but hopefully, he was more lenient.

He glanced back at the waves. The sun was slipping over the horizon. He sighed and squeezed her hand.

“Come on, Soapy. I better get you back so I can get home on time. Tonight’s probably the worst possible night for me to miss my curfew.”

He stood and pulled her to her feet. The urge to kiss her, just once before he spent his teenage years locked away, was strong but he just couldn’t. Instead, he let go of her hands and picked up the soda bottles they’d had earlier, depositing them in a recycling bin as they made their way back to Johnny’s motorcycle.

“Cold?” He asked, noticing her rubbing her arms.

“A little. I don’t think I planned well for this outing,” she admitted.

“Here, take my jacket,” he offered, slipping it off his shoulders.

“Then you’ll be cold,” she protested.

“Nah, I’ll be fine. But if you’re worried, you can always hold on to me a little tighter,” he smirked.

“I’m sure that will help,” she laughed, rolling her eyes as she put the jacket on and reached out for the helmet he was holding.

“Worth a shot,” he shrugged.

Maybe it was wishful thinking or just his imagination, but she was holding him tighter than usual as they wound their way out of the hills and zoomed towards her East valley home.

It seemed all too soon to Sophie as Robby stopped the bike by her curb. She hadn’t wanted the day to come to an end either.

“Here," she said, offering the jacket back as she climbed of the motorcycle.

"You keep it," he deflected. "It looks better on you anyway." And that he wouldn't be needing it after the next day went unspoken. They stood in awkward silence for a moment, neither wanting to leave the other.

"Well, I guess this is it," he said finally.

She nodded, then suddenly threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. After a second of shock, he returned the hug, pressing her against him as he breathed in the minty scent of her shampoo.

“I'm scared Soapy" he admitted softly.

"I know. I've been praying for you and I know it will be okay. It has to be. You'll be back at school by third hour," she replied. "This isn't goodbye. It can't be. I refuse to believe that. You have to refuse to believe it too," she pulled away and looked into his eyes. “Third hour, okay?"

He smiled, sadly, "Third hour." He wished he could have her unwavering faith on the subject, but he knew guys like him didn't catch the good breaks. “By..”

“This isn’t goodbye,” she insisted, putting her hand over his mouth. “See you later.”

“See you later,” he smiled. He watched her going into the house before starting the bike again.

This isn’t goodbye.

#Cobra Kai #fluff/angst prompt #Robby #Soapy #ten minutes

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latetotherant · 5 years

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“Are you rich?” Is Shrill too Economically Idealistic for Its Own Good? ••• By Meredith Salisbury

“Oh My God. What’s happening? I’m afraid that I am feeling myself.” These are the words we here Annie (Aidy Bryant) say to her best friend and roommate Fran (Lolly Adefope) while she’s dancing in a new dress and enjoying some new found self-love towards the end of the first episode of Hulu’s comedy Shrill. The show, which is based off of Lindy West’s memoir Shrill: Notes from a Loud Women, follows Annie as she navigates life as a fat millennial woman living in Portland, Oregon. Shrill has been rightfully praised for its blunt and realistic depictions of everyday life as a fat woman and for its nonchalant handling of abortion. For all the care Shrill puts into authentic depictions of Annie’s everyday life, Shrill does so at the expense of showing the larger and more systemic issues fat women face. The omission of these larger cultural forces makes Annie’s transformation seem idealistic, unrealistic, and impossible for the women watching replicate.

Shrill is set in Portland, Oregon. It makes sense that one of the most accepting and liberal cities in the popular imagination is the setting for televisions first radically positive representation of fat women. Like Portlandia, another socially conscious television show set in Portland, Shrill uses comedy to point out where its liberal audience fails in their liberalness. In Shrill, radical self love, queerness, and anti-capitalist ideals are all casually accepted from the get go. Annie’s parents praise Fran’s, who is a lesbian’s, love life with her rotating door of queer partners and Annie’s ex-punk gen-x boss Gabe (John Cameron Mitchell) vilifies “the establishment” regularly. In a way Shrill feels like it teeters on the line between comedy and parody. It is unclear that the Portland represented in Shrill is different than the one created by the sketch comedy show Portlandia. Carrie Brownstein, the creator and star of Portlandia, even directed the Shrill episode “Date.” The similarities between the shows’ representation of Portland is not necessarily a bad thing—Portlandia did a great job at pointing out to liberal people where their liberal ideologies fell short—and Shrill picks up where Portlandia left off and continues this crusade. The issue is that Portlandia was satirical whereas Shrill is meant to be realistic. Shrill, like Portlandia, does not take into account Oregon’s white supremacist past or the fact that Portland is the whitest large city in America nor does it acknowledge how Oregon is one of the most expensive states to live in and that Portland is experiencing an affordable housing crisis.

The fact that Annie and Fran are never plagued with systemic issues leaves room for the show to explore interpersonal ones like Annie’s relationship with her boss Gabe. Gabe is Shrill’s villain. He is the editor-in-chief of The Weekly Throne, the alt-weekly newspaper Annie works for. At first he frustrates her by passively blowing off her pitches and asking her to keep working her way up, but by the fourth episode, the one titled “Pool” he begins a crusade against fatness. After learning The Weekly Thorn can save “a buttload of money” if the staff can “pry [their] cheese-thighs off the couch more than once a week” he gets rid of the vending machines and requires the staff to do “one heart healthy grouptivity once a month.” At the first “grouptivity” Gabe mutters “lazy bodies lazy minds” under is breath. He goes on to question whether Annie takes work seriously and tell her that “success is about an effort” and that “[she] didn’t [try] today.”

Through Gabe, the show pushes people who believe they are fighting against dominant culture to see that they still have biases they need to work on. Gabe is portrayed as a gen-x, ex-punk, and “feminist” through jokes about being the “original bassist in Bikini Kill,” by wearing band t-shirts for bands like Quasi (Janet Weiss of Sleater-Kinney fame’s band), and the fact that Gabe is played by John Cameron Mitchell who is an queer gen-x icon in his own right. We are led to believe that Gabe’s work was once gritty and boundary pushing. He claims when he was Annie’s age he was already “burnin’ shit down and fuckin shit up.” But, what we see now is someone who was on the right side of history, but lost his way as he became older and more financially stable. He is a former radical who is hindering Annie’s growth professionally and personally.

The way Gabe treats Annie at The Weekly Thorne is terrible. Shrill uses Annie and Gabe’s work relationship to drive Annie to find self confidence. The thing is for women work is not just another place for interpersonal relationships. It is a place that provides people with an income and (hopefully) benefits. Individuals need these to survive. In Shrill Annie never once thinks about the financial ramifications of her actions. At work she is not very professional. She is seen sitting on tables, hugging her boss when he gives her an assignment, pestering him about pitches, and posts an article to the paper’s site without permission. While some workplaces are significantly more informal than others, Annie’s behavior at work does not make it appear as though she values her job. Gabe is by no accounts a good boss and she has every right to be upset with the way he is treating her, but it is still fascinating to me that Annie never once seems concerned about the possibility of losing her job. She even quits in a fit of rage in the last episode. It is known that fat women face discrimination when they are applying for jobs and full time jobs in any media industry are nearly impossible to find these days. There is never a moment where Annie stops and worries about what the implications of leaving her job would be. Sure she stood up for herself, but at what cost? She walked away from an income and health insurance without batting an eyelash. What other millennial women who works in media could do that?

Annie and Fran’s financial situation remains a mystery throughout the six episodes. How is it that two marginalized women in creative careers can have very little financial anxiety? The only inkling of concern comes from Fran when she asks Annie “Are you rich? That’s like $50 every time you have sex with Ryan” when she finds out Annie has been taking the morning after pill every time she has sex with Ryan. Annie never addresses this, she is rightfully preoccupied with the abortion she needs to have, but it still leaves the viewer wondering how she is finacially staying afloat.

Annie’s spending on the morning after pill is not the only unexplained expense in the show. A quick google search revealed that Annie and Fran live in a home that last sold in 2016 for $500,158 and rents for similar houses in the same neighborhood are around $2400 a month. It is unclear how they can afford to live there with Annie working for a small alt-weekly newspaper and Fran cutting people’s hair out of her house. It’s even more baffling when you add in the fact that Fran does not even require payment for her work. The only time we see her compinstated for her work she is paid in stolen clothes. How do these two afford a multi-bedroom house in Portland, Oregon, a place that is notorious for unaffordable housing, while working in independent publishing and freelance hair styling?

The walls of Annie and Fran’s home are adorned with art prints like this one that used to be sold at Otherwild and Fran is often spotted in Wildfang overalls and coveralls. Both brands have become trendy in recent years and are recognizable in queer urban circles as marker for a type of queer financial stability. Wildfang coveralls are the velour Juicy Couture track suit of lesbian culture. Rachel Syme explains that the “Juicy’s suit was just pricey enough to radiate status, but attainable enough to become a part of the everyday wardrobes of thousands of high-school girls.” Wildfang’s clothes do the same thing for queer women. Fran’s $188 coveralls signal to queer women watching that she is financially stable, yet still relatable, but it is never addressed how she got this way.

Annie quits her job in a fit of rage after Gabe writes a rebuttal to her article claiming her fatness. In this moment we see Annie stand up for herself. She calls Gabe a “bully” and tells him he is “stomp[ing] over an entire group of people.” We are supposed to cheer Annie on in this moment—she has finally began to believe in herself—but she just walks out of her job without any real concern about her future. This moment is the climax of the season. But what is she going to do now? Study after study has found that fat women face major discrimination when applying for jobs; especially in the media industry. I am proud of her for standing up for herself, but I do not see how any real person could do that without some type of financial safety net.

For fat women and queer women Annie and Fran appear to be wonderful role models. Annie is smart, and stylish, and finding her voice in a way many of us hope to and Fran is strong, and unwavering in her sexuality and standards. Shrill does a wonderful job creating inspiring role models, but Annie and Fran’s lives are impossible to replicate in everyday life. Throughout the season we see Annie strutting around Portland in a collection of adorable and perfectly tailored dresses. It turns out that almost all of Annie’s clothes were custom made for the show by costume designer Amanda Needham. Fran’s strength is a linchpin of the show and she is portrayed as the foil to Annie. In her review of Shrill Emily Nussbaum explains that Fran “specialize in brassy self-assertion, a bravado that doubles as a shield and as a weapon.” and later explains that it’s Annie’s “niceness ... that fuels the show.” Fran’s self-assertion comes from her ability to opt-out of interacting with straight men, other than her brother or the occasional boy Annie brings home. Shrill leads us to believe that Fran’s lesbianism is what makes her that brash woman who refuses take shit and this is why she is able to empower Annie. Although all women are taught throughout their lives to seek the validation of men; coming out as a lesbian frees you from some of those expectations. Although male bosses, relatives, and friends still exist; there is no longer the expectation that one of the men in your life could be your future partner and this alleviates some of the compulsory need to please them. Annie on the other hand still believes she needs to placate a boy and win over a boss and those needs hinder her ability to stand up for herself. The thing is that queerness does not suddenly alleviate all of those pressures. As much as I would love to exist in a world without problematic straight men and the patriarchal nonsense they bring with them it is not possible. Fran has created a life where she only cuts cute girls’ hair and somehow still has a roof over her head a wardrobe full of $200 Wildfang overalls. Her queerness and lack of traditional employment may allow her to accept herself without pause, but the lack of hardship or pushback she receives is implausible and unlike the experiences of any queer women I have ever known or heard about.

Shrill represents a radical hope for fat women’s futures. It presents a nuanced depiction of the everyday struggles of fat women, but refuses to complicate its narrative with the broader and more systemic sexist and homophobic struggles fat women face. By diving deep into specificities it allows Annie to overcome her personal problems but misses the mark on addressing larger structural ones. In Shrill’s universe, Annie can quit her job without ever acknowledging how hard it is for fat women to get hired in the first place and Fran can live a blissful queer life in Portland without ever facing a racist or homophobic person. And both of them never have a financial care in the world while living in one of the most expensive cities and working in underpaying careers. I wish the lessons taught in Shrill were applicable to everyday life. I wish I could call out a fat-phobic boss on the internet without the fear of losing my employment and possibly my health insurance. I wish I could only cut cute girls’ hair and still have a roof over my head and some of the most stylish clothes in queer culture today. But alas I do not live in the world Shrill has created and I do not think I ever will.

#meredith salisbury #television #shrill #tv #pop culture #queer

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thejenesaisquoigirl · 4 years

Note

For your D&D character meme, how 'bout odds for Talise, evens for Tamsyn, and the letter C? :D

Had a feeling this revenge was coming XD *cracks knuckles* Here we go!

1) What would they consider to be their biggest failure?

Talise: Oof. Maybe not being able to save her family, or at least her sister-in-law and nephew. Maybe her (former) deep reliance on alcohol once her memories started coming back. Trauma is a motherfucker

2) What’s the story behind their name?

Tamzen: When it comes to naming characters, I really just start thinking of names that stick out. It started with “Tiernan”–from Pirate Queen–and I must have watched an episode of The Tudors with Tamsin Merchant to remember that name, too. “Tamsin” kept sounding best with the character concept and then the spelling changed to “-zen” as a subtle joke since she’s a monk haha

3) What’s their relationship with their family?

Talise: When she was Hosanna, very close. They all loved learning (though maybe different things), the people in their city, and each other. She was closest to her brother, Yanis, despite their age difference. She felt adrift without a family unit, having a ship and crew helped, and finding Yanis has upset any equilibrium she was finding.

4) What’s one song that describes them or is them?

Tamzen: Not many peeps know this, but she was built to be the personification of the “Morgan: Amor Tristis (or Morgan - Amor Tristis on Spotify)” instrumental from the Ah! My Goddess movie. My all-time favorite instrumental and it suits her story.

5) Who is their best friend?

Talise: Expanding on the Yanis thing, he was her best friend growing up. So the years in which she thought he was dead and that she failed him were rough…but she was working towards a place of resignation…then they found him alive. It’s super weird now because yes, her brother used to be able to embarrass her; but now, it’s the first time she’s ever felt shame. Hosanna, while sharing a small flair for the dramatic, was a very different person than Talise was crafted to be. But in the party, Jax is the closest to a best friend, no contest.

6) Why are they their class?

Tamzen: She ran away from the city after her heartbreak and stumbled across a traveling group of mousefolk. Most of them were monks but since she stayed with the leader and his wife (the only ones with stuff able to house a larger humanoid), they were the ones who taught her as a way to find calm and take back a sense of control.

7) What do they think of their party members?

Talise: She feels distinct lines in the sand. At first, they seemed only about their sleeping habits (there was no other way the rooming arrangements could have shaken out and everyone live). But now, it feels very much like two separate factions working together. Separately: Q- she’s terrified of everything she does being in that book, and she has a hard time wrestling with his innocent naiveté when it reminds her of who she used to be. Briony- Not used to being around women in a strictly friendship sense, but is happy for her presence so Q has someone of a similar maturity. Braxton- He’s rarely there. Jax- They instinctually understand each other. It’s complicated but in a good way. Caspian- Like recognizes like but she feels they have different motivations behind collecting information…and it’s hard for her to move beyond a betrayal of trust.

8) In what ways are they similar to you?

Tamzen: Extremely calm under pressure, thinks she’s never good enough to be significant to anyone enough to not leave her, thoughtful gift-giver, gives herself for others until there’s nothing left, can have an accidentally sharp sense of humor, deep well of feeling and protectiveness for those she considers “hers”

9) In what ways are they different from you?

Talise: Unashamed in the way she moves through the world, unabashedly flirtatious and teasing, confident, how she copes with things (tends to be physical indulgences), seeing trust as black and white, unafraid of confrontation or large birds

10) What do they look for in a romantic partner, if they have a romantic orientation?

Tamzen: Someone who doesn’t see her as second best or not enough. Someone she doesn’t need to take care of but who can take care of her. Tamzen has a competency kink a mile wide; so if they’re even-keeled, stronger, a better fighter, and extremely skilled in what they do…they’re definitely her type. She’s a pretty quiet person, so they need to be comfortable with silence and understand things unsaid as she’s very action-oriented. You can tell a lot about how she feels about someone based on her actions, not her words. They also need to love her son.

11) If they had a patronus or animagus form, what would it be?

Talise: Ooooooooo….idk. Maybe a panther animagus? Something that slinks around with confidence but can be very soft. Patronus would be a cat like Talis or a hippogriff like Fantôme…or a peafowl.

12) What do they smell like?

Tamzen: Orange blossoms and vanilla, with hints of herbs that can be used medicinally (eg: lavender, tea tree, etc)

13) What is their secret skill?

Talise: Sketching/drawing. She’s intensely private about it; but has charcoal, pencils, and a sketchbook in her pack that’s rather like a diary.

14) What is their relationship to spirituality?

Tamzen: Complicated haha. She’s a “tsuki kitsune” and I tweaked that to mean she’s a fox blessed by the goddess of love with the potential of becoming “human.” Her “parents” are the guardians of a special, unknown spot in a forest the goddess has declared sacred; there to take care of the clearing and of any creature blessed by it…and Tamzen was a fox spawned there. Anyways, so even as a fox, she was engrained with this strong belief in the goddess and had an awareness of her presence; but then something devastating happened with the person Tamzen thought she was fated to be with–who had been the cause of her transformation. Ever since, Tamzen has had a tumultuous time with the idea of love…much less having firm faith in her goddess, because she feels betrayed. She’s slowly trying to repair her side of the relationship through making sure her friends find love; but she still thinks she’s been abandoned by someone she had absolute faith in, so she’s weary.

15) If they were to be remembered for something, what would they want to be remembered for?

Talise: NOT like what they were shouting at Hosanna. She’d like to be remembered, in general, rather than lost to lines in a book. She wants people to speak of her and the small amount of goodness she’s put into the world.

16) Why did they become an adventurer?

Tamzen: Happenstance led to her becoming a monk…and she needed additional discipline to try to silence the rage and nastiness brewing inside of her, so she joined the army. The adventuring grew from that.

17) What’s one thing about their backstory that came to you after you already started playing the campaign?

Talise: THIS HAPPENS ALL THE TIME. One notable thing–I hadn’t even thought about her being an alcoholic (sober now) until making her playlist. For some reason, “Chandelier” kept coming up and it had to have been a sign because it’s deepened her in ways I wasn’t expecting. Also her tattoos.

18) Do you have any headcanons for them that haven’t come up in game? Or headcanons for other party members?

Tamzen: Totes! She plays the lute only for Tal or when she needs to really think through something–frequently those moments are one in the same when he’s playing outside. Her internal crisis over always being second best and slowly being resigned to it. Party members: Mama: they sometimes read together (even though Tamzen doesn’t like to read), trade skills (Mama helps her build strength and she helps Mama with flexibility), and that Mama has to spend extra time in front of a mirror before going to a fancy event to take in the fact that this is her life now and she gets to wear these pretty things and be feminine. Kerrick: that he’ll sometime have ink in his hair from running his fingers through it while copying down spells. TBD: thinks it’s hilarious how he still hasn’t had to explain his name and has a running bet with himself over it. Finn: she catches Tal speaking squeakspeak to Finn while playing and Finn just going with it and trying to learn the game through context instead.

19) Any ships with your character? If a PC or NPC, what interaction launched it?

Talise: YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE, SHIPPY MCSHIPPERSON xD. She’s the first character in a LONG time I legit ship with another PC. Whether it becomes romantic or remains platonic (it’s not just up to me or Talise), Jax is the most significant person in her life–excluding her brother. They just got each other from day one and they seem to be the only ones able to easily talk to the other, even when the subject is difficult. The canon you created about her feeling safe with Jax is 100% true; ever since Before, she has a hard time sleeping around other people but she trusts him enough to even share a bed…and he’s the only one with whom she would never be anything but truthful. At their core, they are people reinventing themselves after tragedy but don’t know if they’re doing it right. But Jax makes Talise feel it’s alright to be who she authentically is rather than acting the part she’s written for herself; and to find joy again in the things from her past. The ship’s legit launch was after their serious conversation about “equivalent exchange” in relationships (about Caspian) and has since been buoyed by all their side chats + interactions. “…are you just going to stare at me?” “Until you’re ready.”

20) What would your character consider their biggest success? Or what is your favorite success your character has had so far?

Tamzen: Tal and facing Silas again. She’s really surprised me in how she’s been able to grow to where she is now…so that’s an awesome success because it feels like there’s still more growing for her to do emotionally. But the ultimate success EVER was the gift of the hearthstone to Mama. It was canon lore created on the fly and it was so meaningful and has become a cornerstone of Tamzen’s character.

Letter C:

Smartest- Talise and Syl are the most booksmart; Calla is the wisest about people (followed by Talise and Tamzen); Vi is the smartest about how to use people for her advantage; Mireth is the most diplomatically savvy.Most Attractive- Tamzen is that annoying woman who looks beautiful even without makeup (#blessed) but isn’t necessarily sexy like Talise is. From there it’s Mireth (that half elf/half fae glowup), Calla (aasimar moon baby), Lady Vi (moon elf tall, slim model build), Evi (Italian witchy woman), and then Syl (striking but not always considered beautiful).Hogwarts- Ravenclaws are Talise and Syl. Slytherins are Lady Vi and Evi. Hufflepuffs are Calla and Mireth. Gryffindor is Tamzen.

#fuzzy feathers #@sapphireemeralds #food for asks #ask and you shall receive #dnd #ref for character

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thesinglesjukebox · 5 years

Video

youtube

HAIM - SUMMER GIRL

[7.92]

We think it’s fly when these girls stop by for the summer...

Nellie Gayle: I'm not exactly the least biased observer when it comes to Haim's music. I owe a good portion of my close friendships and my longterm relationship to the Twitter fandom they cultivated around the time of their first release, when I was a tiny baby in college. But, still, I think my respect and affection for them doesn't disqualify me from having a valuable opinion on them. In this case, I can especially appreciate "Summer Girl" as the rare Haim song celebrating longevity and long distance in all of its pangs and nuanced happy moments. Written for Danielle Haim's partner during a serious illness, Summer Girl is a painfully sweet momento of that moment when we realize exactly what we are to other people and walk toward that version of ourselves. There's an easy breezy quality to the song that's underpinned by the fear and trauma that can visit a relationship. To be a summer girl, here, is less about wilding out for yourself in global warming record highs (still an admirable pastime), and more about how we can find strength by viewing our own selves -- malleable, fragile, messy -- as the strength and release someone else needs. This shift in perspective creates love for both ourselves, and the vessels of care and affection in our lives *collective 'awwwww'* [10]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Lou Reed knew how to make these sparse, simple songs that felt content with life despite knowing its many shortcomings. "Summer Girl" feels imbued with that same gritty hope, not least because its "Walk on the Wild Side" influence is patently obvious. The backstory of this song -- that it was written for Danielle Haim's partner Ariel Rechtshaid after he was diagnosed with testicular cancer -- makes this feel all the more heartfelt. But really, it's there in the music itself. This is the sort of song that feels like the product of a jam session between friends, where repetition and marginal changes in dynamics are a reflection of lazy summer days and a desire to just do something with the people you care about. Danielle Haim grounds the song with her vocals, but it's the music -- ever-loping and easy-going -- that signals the message here that everything will be all right. I'm reminded of Pavement's "Gold Soundz," specifically the notion of a mutual emptiness. What Malkmus spoke of was a romanticized ennui, but any emptiness I sense here is of a different sort: a willingness to empty oneself completely, to be filled with nothing but the love of another. [7]

Katie Gill: Thankfully, the four minute long showcase for a saxophone riff features a REALLY GOOD saxophone riff. [6]

Michael Hong: Haim may have described "Summer Girl" as an attempt to emulate "Walk on the Wild Side" by Lou Reed, but its aesthetics also seemed to be partially informed by Danielle's recent stints across Vampire Weekend's Father of the Bride, especially, the jazzy-vibes of "Sunflower" and "Flower Moon." And similar to Vampire Weekend, Haim have a strength for distilling decades of influences to make their music sound simply like the present. On the surface, "Summer Girl" sounds exactly like a summer breeze, but it's deceptively chill. The burden of forced positivity leads to a sadness and the feeling that the group is holding back that creep into the track's breezy atmosphere. That sadness and restraint should be worrying; however, Danielle's reassuring vocals flip any anxiety into peace, and everything else disappears in the meditative way she repeats the line "I'm your summer girl." [7]

Ashley Bardhan: I love how soft Danielle's vocals are and how the saxophone peeks out from behind it, like the twinkling of an ice cream truck on a sticky July night. I feel the heavy summer breeze passing when she says "You walk beside me, not behind me/Feel my unconditional love." It's a whispered command breaking into love and heat, opening the grey clouds to see the "angels coming now." As the song ends, amidst steely drums and saxophone swelling, you reached the beach in your favorite town. [8]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: Songs about summer love take place at the beach, on bright sunny days, end at parties; they are flirtatious, playful, even dangerous; they sound like the rush of falling in love at an irresponsible pace, but being too young and dumb to give a care about the eventual season's change. To be sure, these songs are great, but "Summer Girl" is so arresting and gorgeous precisely because of its subversion of this formula. It begins after the thrill of the chase has already subsided, and focuses instead on the emotional intimacy and complexity that percolates afterwards. When Haim whisper, "I can see it in your face/I'm relief/I'm your summer girl," it's the portrait of romance so intoxicating that pillow talk doesn't require talking at all in order to understand connection -- no matter how brief. The meandering saxophone soundtracks this all sublimely, tinged with bittersweetness as if to ruminate on the nature of love that, by definition, has an expiration date. I know I'm young and supposed to be at some club hooking up to whatever song of the summer dominates the airwaves, but this year, all I want to do is lay in an open field gazing at stars, surrounded by nothing but the sound of crickets chirping, the crackle of bonfire, and this song playing in the background as I fall asleep in a stranger's arms. [9]

Josh Buck: An unexpected and disarmingly smooth four minute swerve that makes a compelling case for Haim's longevity. [8]

Alfred Soto: A minute before the "doo-doo" hook I knew the drum pattern and sax were drenched in "Walk on the Wild Side," and it fits: Danielle Haim on a casual stroll across Hamptons dunes, cheering herself up with the musical memories competing in her head. [7]

Kayla Beardslee: An absolutely perfect summer song, "Summer Girl" would work best when played on a lazy August weekend, sitting on a screened-in porch or sprawling on a wooden dock, watching the sun slowly dip below the horizon and turn the sky pink and orange -- but I'm listening to it at a dining table on a Tuesday afternoon, and it still sounds wonderful. Danielle Haim is restrained, voice gliding smoothly over the bass with a contentment that matches the lyrics, but her emotions break through on the stellar bridge, where she describes her memories of earthquake drills and tears behind dark sunglasses. These images, which in a vacuum would seem sinister, are instead imbued with a surprising nostalgia, and the best lines in the song follow moments later. Danielle sings, "Walk beside me/Not behind me/Feel my unconditional love," and you can feel a lifetime's worth of emotions -- infatuation, frustration, longing, respect, happiness -- wrapped up in those ten seconds. And behind it all are the joyful bursts of saxophone, echoing like they're coming from just around the next street corner: the instrument, like the song as a whole, blissful, content, and yet always in motion. [8]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Summer in Southern California is, perhaps counter-intuitively, a dreary time. As a kid in the vast suburbs below Los Angeles, summer was mainly characterized by the absence of things -- of the structure of the school day, of the friends you picked up (gone away to various sleepaway camps), of the will to do anything that would risk your leaving the cool darkness of your room. The weather the rest of the year was good enough to be summer, and so the season itself became a sort of filler period, a tone-setter lost in the tone. "Summer Girl" is a song that captures the feeling of an endless Southern Californian summer perfectly, its lazy backbeat and drifting saxophones rattling around in my ears until the track's disparate parts melt together. For a band that's tended towards studio perfection even in their jammiest moments (c.f. "Little of Your Love"), the move towards chill is almost disconcerting. But afternoons spent waiting out the sun deserve soundtracks as much as any of the more kinetic times of summer, and "Summer Girl" fits that bill better than anything I've heard in a while. [8]

Kylo Nocom: "Summer Girl" hearkens back to weird memories of hazy 6th grade school buses playing Kendrick Lamar on the radio and 9th grade memories of looping Radiohead by myself thinking about all of the memories I was going to make in high school. It obviously doesn't resemble the former two artists at all past any invented superficial resemblances (well, the outro does resemble "Separator" a little...) but it captures something specific that I haven't felt in a long, long time. Much of this is like one long blur of looped familiarity, but the bridge is a sweet moment of lucidity quickly whipped into yet another river of pure daydreaming music. Summer's been rough on me; it's my last summer before graduating and I'm still so confused by what I want to do. This, in all of its reassuring and affirming glory, is a pleasant reminder that I've got all the time I need. [9]

Vikram Joseph: "Summer Girl" derives much of its power from the pull and tension between the crisis of health and love that inspired the song (hinted at when they sing about "the tears behind your dark sunglasses") and their determination to present the season as an airy, carefree thing nonetheless. The minimal, pastel tones of the production are impossibly classy -- there are shades of Broken Social Scene at their most light-handed here, and a saxophone part that suspends the song a few feet off the ground, like a balloon perpetually on the verge of carrying the whole thing off into the stratosphere. [8]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

#Haim #pop #music #music review #writing

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crying-over-spilled-feels · 5 years

Text

When the World Comes Crashing Down

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the canon characters; they belong to Marvel and Stan Lee. If I did own the characters, well, I would make several changes, notably what happens to the Avengers and Loki during the battle to stop Thanos and reverse the destruction.

He thought it was a game at first; the boys loved to play hide-and-seek.

He thought it was a trick of the light.

He thought it was a trick of his eyes as an after effect from all the combat he’d seen in his life.

He thought it was only a hallucination.

He thought it was only a dream.

He though it was only a nightmare.

He never thought it would be real.

Clint Barton screams as he crashes to his knees in the middle of the park, his face already completely soaked with tears as he curses loudly.

Clint finds out he isn’t the only one. He isn’t the only one who lost family in the ‘Snap’ as the news and the Avengers are calling it. However, he is the one who lost the most family in the mad Titan Thanos’ destructive, genocidal plan to wipe out half the universe. The numbness that travels through Clint’s body as he returns to the farmhouse, what was once his safehouse, chills him to the core. Cooper and Lilah were in high school, and Nathaniel was barely in elementary school. All of his children deserved a better life. None of them deserved to vanish away into dust before their father’s eyes while spending a summer day at the park as a family. And, Laura… Laura, his doting, amazing, beautiful, and intelligent wife who stood by his side beside everything. She had his back when he was a top S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, even at the potential danger to her own life. When Clint returned home from Budapest with a potentially life-threatening injury, Laura didn’t demand he quit trying to save the world. Instead, she nursed him back to health and let Natasha stay over as the redhead’s injuries healed as well. God, he loved her; Clint doesn’t understand why his Savior couldn’t stop Thanos from killing half the universe. Perhaps the Infinity Stones were too strong for even Him to wield, though Clint knows that the very idea of that is blasphemous, so he strikes it from his thoughts. Perhaps God knew the Avengers could find a way to solve the crisis presented by Thanos. However, that is no comfort for the grief-stricken man known as Clint Barton as he comes home to an empty house, devoid of laughter, happiness, and sense of purpose now that he is a family of one.

Natasha calls as soon as she gets back to the United States from Wakanda. She tries to understand her best friend and partner’s grief, but no one can really understand what it is like for Clint. Not even Thor could understand, and the God of Thunder lost his entire family from countless wars and Thanos’ greed. However, Thor did not have to suffer the loss of a wife and three children, some of the purest bonds that exist in all of the galaxies. And for that, Clint believes that the Norse God of Thunder should be extremely grateful.

“Clint?” Natasha gasps as Barton picks up the phone, his breath shaky on the other end of the phone as he tries to regulate his breathing.

“Natasha?” Clint chokes out a sob, glad to hear his friends’ voice, even if it is just over the phone.

“Hey. Is everyone---?”

“They’re all dead, Nat!” Clint screams into the phone before quieting himself and realizing that Natasha is not to blame for this crisis. “The Snap or whatever in Hell’s name we’re calling it killed my entire family! Lilah, Cooper, Nathaniel, Laura,” he continues, his voice cracking after each voice before tears consume him as he breathes out Laura’s name. “I had to watch them fade to dust in front of my eyes! If I ever find that genocidal maniac known as Thanos, he’ll regret ever messing with the Barton family!” Clint growls, and Natasha has never heard her friend sound so animalistic in nature before.

Granted, he has never lost his entire family, and Natasha merits that he could never talk again and that would also have been an acceptable response to this tragedy. So, in order to spare her best friend the pain of describing the scene the occurred at the farmhouse, she sticks to telling him of the battle against Thanos. She tells him how Tony is trapped in space with Thanos’ recently converted daughter Nebula. In addition, she tells him of all of their fallen comrades who perished in Wakanda. When Clint says nothing about the death of their friends and comrades, particularly Wanda whom he took under his wing after the battle in Sokovia went south, Natasha begins to worry.

“Are you there?” Natasha inquires, concern lacing her voice as she finds it eerie that Clint wouldn’t even make a peep, not even about his family.

Surely, he, too, didn’t disintegrate into dust. The Snap wouldn’t have a second wave of casualties, would it? Was that even possible?

“No, I’m not. The Clint Barton you once knew is dead, Nat. He’s gone just like his family.”

Clint hangs up on Natasha, and the Black Widow’s resolve breaks. She allows a single tear to run down her face, not even bothering to wipe it away when Steve comes to tell her goodbye and good luck.

When Clint makes his plan for revenge against the genocide of half the world, he emerges from the farmhouse, sporting a new haircut to mark his transition from Hawkeye to Ronin. To mark a superhero’s descent into lawlessness and vigilante status, one must change his or her hair. At least, that is the story Clint has always heard from the other agents at S.H.I.E.L.D. during his time at the Academy and when he mentored the younger agents.

“How’re you holding up?” someone asks Clint when he emerges from the house nearly a week later to buy food and other rations for himself for his journey to rid the world of other genocidal maniacs.

“Children don’t deserve to die in Thanos’ Snap,” Clint mutters through gritted teeth, setting his supplies on the counter where the clerk can check them out. “Least of all, not mine,” he whispers, taking his bags of supplies and settling them in his undercover backpack Fury had gifted him after basic training at the Academy.

Oh, how long ago that had been. That had been before he met Natasha for the first time. That had been before he became a top S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. That had been before…. Before he met Laura, the love of his life. The backpack was not only practical; it was meant to transition Clint back into a life of isolation, recklessness, and overall secrecy. If he was to become a shadow of his former self, so be it. There would be no one around to witness the fall.

When the world comes crashing down, sometimes even heroes add excessive amounts of red to their ledgers in order to soothe the pain of guilt and anger surrounding the innocent lives lost at the hands of madmen.

Author’s Note: And there it is! This is my first Endgame fic, so I hope everyone enjoyed this little look into Clint’s mind. Clint has always been one of my favorite Marvel characters since I first started watching Marvel in May of 2018. Captain Marvel was actually my first superhero film I saw in theaters with Avengers: Endgame as my second. My friend AJ and I went to see them both on my day off, and we absolutely loved them! I nearly broke down into tears during the first five minutes in the scene with Clint’s family, because I just love the Barton family so much and I didn’t want anything to happen to Clint’s world. You can imagine how upset I was. Anyway, expect more Endgame stories from me; I was really inspired through much of the movie, especially with a certain Clint and Natasha scene. As always, reviews are greatly appreciated. Anyway, I have to prepare to go to work soon, so I’ll cut this Author’s Note here. Happy Memorial Day, everyone; bless all the soldiers who gave their lives to fight for what they believe in. Thank you for your service. Until next time, dear readers. Have an amazing day, afternoon, or night!

#clint barton #avengers endgame #avengers engame spoilers #marvel #hawkeye #hawkeye becomes ronin #angst #cross-posted on my FanFiction account #comments are appreciated

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beans-shadow · 6 years

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looking for the truth (pt 1)

Fanfic!!

Fandom: Naruto

Relationship: Kakasaku

Characters: Hatake Kakashi, Haruno Sakura

read on ao3: here

part one / two / three / four / five / six / seven / eight / nine / ten / eleven / twelve / thirteen

Kakashi didn’t know what day everything changed. Maybe it was all at once, but he missed it. Perhaps it was gradual, a slow change, overtaking him bit by bit before he noticed his attitude had shifted. No matter that strategy, it still made the Lifeblood Assault the worst war he had experienced in this shinobi career. Not in terms of casualties, but emotional impact and destruction.

It was a devastating battle. It tore families apart, partners fought against each other without a second thought. Friends as old as they could remember were ripped apart.

And no one could stop themselves.

Here’s how it all started.

“Kakashi-sensei,” his old student greeted him as he walked into the Hokage’s office. Naruto relaxed his feet on the desk covered in stacks of papers, files, and other village business. He obviously did not care that the Hokage could—and would—walk in at any moment, resulting in a bad flick of the head and a bruise that would last for a few days.

“As I always insist, it’s just Kakashi now, Naruto,” he said. “Everyone in our old team should just call me Kakashi.”

Naruto smiled at him. “You’ll always be Kakashi-sensei to me, no matter what.” He tapped his chin. “Although I’m not sure how Sasuke-kun or Sakura-chan feel about this.”

Of course he didn’t, the oblivious fool. Sasuke never really acknowledged Kakashi as a suitable teacher since he arrived late to their first team meeting. And Sakura was hard to crack—still continued to be. By the time she fully accepted her position as head medic, Kakashi eventually convinced her to drop the formalities once in a while, considering Tsunade had taken over as her sensei many years ago. But being her stubborn self, she still tacked on the annoying title. Kakashi didn’t exactly know why, but it had started to bother him more and more recently.

“You’re to go on a mission with me?” Kakashi asked instead. No reason to divulge that information.

Sitting up in his chair, Naruto gave him an excited look, blue eyes wide. “That would be so fun! I hope so. But I don’t actually know, I haven’t been given any details on why I’m here either.”

Kakashi felt her before she entered the room. Without a need to hide her chakra, the Hokage let her energy exude wherever she went, enticing both fear and apprehension in her wake. Kakashi himself stood straighter in anticipation, but Naruto, still not being aware, played with an empty bottle of sake on the desk. How he could miss the powerful presence of Tsunade mystified Kakashi.

He sensed Genma and Raidō set up position by the front door, and the Hokage burst in. She was clearly aggravated on top of her constant sleep deprivation. Mid-sentence, Tsunade didn’t even notice Naruto at her desk as she continued talking to Shizune.

“And then make sure that Shikamaru doesn’t overthink that one—he’s a smart ninja, but even the best chest players overshoot when they believe their opponents to be of equal competence.” Kakashi held his breath as he watched Tsunade pull back her chair, causing Naruto to fumble with his lost footing, and then promptly sit on the young shinobi.

Her train of thought completely halted, her eyes bulging from their sockets. Naruto sent a panicked looked at Kakashi who maintained a neutral composure, while Shizune just rolled her eyes. Tsunade braced her hands on her desk, painted nails scratching the wood.

“Please tell me you aren’t sitting in the most powerful person in this village’s chair, Naruto,” she said in a low voice.

There was a moment of silence.

“No,” Naruto finally said.

Closing her eyes, Tsunade said, “When I get up, I better be able to feel the cushion under my ass in under a second.” Without warning she stood, and Naruto seized the opportunity to escape and rushed to stand at attention next to Kakashi. Sighing contentedly, Tsunade relaxed into her seat. Then she tensed up again. She stared right at Naruto.

“Also tell me you didn’t mess with the settings on the chair, Naruto,” danger dragged from her voice.

Kakashi practically heard Naruto shrink. “No,” he squeaks out. Oh no, Kakashi thought in his head.

Quick as lighting, Tsunade grabbed an empty sake bottle and chucked it at Naruto’s head. “Fool! It took me months to find the perfect combination for maximum relaxation! Get out! No more mission for you!” Naruto managed to dodge the flying drink, but the office wall didn’t stand a chance. It slid through the wall like butter, crashing into the hallway. Genma and Raidō sent a startled glance back into the room through the sake-shaped hole.

Shaking in his orange jumpsuit, Naruto said, “Grandma! That’s not fair!”

Kakashi resisted the urge to shake his head. He never learns, even after so many lessons.

If looks could kill, Naruto would be dead ten times now. “Get. Out.” Tsunade growled, even more irritated after his use of her nickname she always insisted he never utter.

“But Grandma—“

“That’s it! Errand duty, until an undefined time,” Tsunade announced. Then she leapt over the desk, and tossed Naruto from the office through the sake hole. Of course, Naruto, being a little bit larger than a bottle of alcohol, made the extent of the damaged wall increase. Genma groaned from the other side of the hole.

Taking a deep breath, Tsunade calmed herself. After she returned to her desk, she pulled out a new bottle of sake. As she poured herself a generous cup, Shizune muttered. “I’m sure I checked everywhere…”

Tsunade enjoyed her alcohol, taking a big gulp and sighing contentedly as she settled into her chair despite the altered settings. It seems she’d forgotten all about summoning Kakashi, and he waited about another four minutes before he began to talk.

“Godaime—“

“So Kakashi,” Tsunade said over him. “Now we are in a bit of a predicament.”

“We are?” He asked, keeping his bláse attitude.

Twisting her in chair, Tsunade looked out her window overlooking the village. “Indeed. There’s been word of unrest coming from the Land of Mountain Streams in regards to our trading with them. Whispers of a new type of chemical warfare being developed in their lands have reached us, and I need a pair of our soldiers to investigate.”

Such a small Land requiring two strong shinobi. Something must really be up, Kakashi thought. “Sounds like that was an issue before Naruto was,” Kakashi said instead.

“It was,” Tsunade agreed. “But it’s a mission that required two people who know each other very well.”

“May I ask why?”

“You’ll learn once you’re closer to your destination, that’s not important for the time being.” She waves her hand in the air. “So, you’re obviously a good candidate with your ninken, therefore I needed someone that hopefully understood you and your behavior. But now Naruto has irritated me, and I don’t know what to do.” She directed a frown outside.

“What about Gai?” Kakashi suggested. If he had to admit it to himself, Kakashi would say there was no one else who knew him quite like Gai did. Even with his repetitive and often mind-boggling rivalry challenges, Gai had proven himself to be the closest friend of Kakashi’s that had managed to keep themselves alive.

Tsunade shook her head. “This mission requires the delicate use of ninjutsu. Besides, I need Gai for something else.”

Tilting his head to the side, Kakashi asked, “So you thought your next best option was Naruto?”

Laughing, Tsunade grabs her stomach. “Goodness, no,” she says. “I thought of Genma here, and even Anko first, but that didn’t add up to a successful mission. And before you say anything, I did the calculations of a mission with Naruto. You can’t deny the numbers: even with his mishaps, Naruto gets jobs done. And he worked with you for a long time. So he was pretty much perfect. So who else would know you as well as Naruto?” She gazed outside, scanning the village. “He was a former student of yours. You don’t have many, if any, others of those. Sasuke is out of the village doing Kami knows what, and…” Her eyes fell on the village hospital. “Sakura… Sakura?” She repeats. Spinning, she excitedly poured her chakra out at Kakashi. “Sakura! I forgot about her!”

Something dark churned in Kakashi’s stomach. “You forgot about your own student?”

“No, of course not,” Tsunade insisted. “I forgot she was a student under you, since she is, and has been, mine for so long. You used to teach her. She knows you almost as good as Might Gai does. She’ll go with you. Perfect. Crisis averted.”

“Sakura? Come with me on this mission?” Kakashi practically repeated her orders, for some reason dazed. Not that he and Sakura have had any falling out, but the shinobi had found himself avoiding his former pupil more and more as of late. She didn’t need him pestering her, she was too busy, he didn’t deserve to bother her...

Kakashi was knocked out from his slight confusion with a hand wave from Tsunade. “Well, who else is there? Besides, Sakura is getting antsy in the surgical room. She loves it there, but she also loves being out in the field. This will get her off my back. Here are the mission details, please share them with her when you’re closer to the village.” A manila folder is shoved across the desk.

Kakashi accepted the mission, of course, like the good soldier he was. He’s had years, decades, to separate his emotions and personal feelings from his job. He didn’t fully understand his hesitance or presentiment about this particular assignment, but that didn’t mean compartmentalizing wouldn’t be possible.

With a nod, Kakashi was excused from the Hokage’s presence. He could get through a little mission with Sakura. He’d been through a lot with her: exams, wars, injuries. So what if they weren’t as close as they used to be. It wasn’t a big deal.

He could do this.

It’ll be quick, he told himself. He would get the job done, and he’ll put the pink-haired kunoichi out of his mind.

#kakasaku #kakashi #sakura #naruto #fanfic #ao3 #but thought i would post here too #looking for the truth #my writing

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simplemlmsponsoring · 5 years

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New Post has been published on http://simplemlmsponsoring.com/attraction-marketing-formula/copywriting/revisiting-2018-do-what-your-heart-feels-is-right/

Revisiting 2018 – Do What Your Heart Feels is Right

Last day of the year is always special. It’s the last time I sat down to write in 2018. It is also an excellent time to reflect upon things that happened this year and make plans for the year to come.

It’s been a while since I composed a yearly review, but here I am, documenting some of the moments of 2018 that I would like to remember forever. In the first week of December 17, We redesigned ShoutMeLoud and got a new logo and did some great work there. Sharat inked himself with ShoutMeLoud logo which is remarkable:

I started 2018 just after one of the most amazing trips to Antarctica, and for the first time, Delhi winter didn’t feel as freezing as it usually does. Now, unlike other years, 2018 was different.

It was a lot of introspection and self-learning for me. I had to fight a lot of my inner demons which I knew existed for years but never dared to face them.

It was more like trash piling up in one corner of the room that I knew was there, but I never took action.

The first half of the year unearthed many of them, and I realized that I had to accept them before I could fight them.

When I look back, I feel I could have done better in the first half of the year. The only thing I could do was to surrender myself to the whole experience and acknowledge my achievements, realize my mistakes and use the learnings to make better decisions in the future.

2018 was the year when I made the most mistakes, which also makes it the year of great learnings.

I will try to put down my experience below so that you can learn from my mistakes and have a better year ahead.

Also, when I grow old, it would be nice to look back at this phase and smile.

Ok then, here we go:

January and February 2018

Last few months of 2017 were super exciting. I achieved things I never thought I would on personal as well as the financial front.

I kept thinking of early retirement as it felt like I had achieved most of my goals.

I stopped growing for a bit and my perspective changed from being a student of life to someone who thought he knew it all.

I had, unknowingly, started surrounding myself with people who were nice to me, rather than those who were honest in my face. Instead of taking actions, my impulse to seek recognition started increasing.

For me, it was a tough one to digest as I never thought I could be such a person. But it was happening!

The first two months of the year were the toughest and also the slowest for me.

Day-dreaming and running away from accountability, I was making my future difficult.

Sometimes it gets hard to see things when you are in the middle of it all. Don’t you agree?

I was almost in the midst of a mid-life crisis, figuring out what to do next.

It was not productive but the questions I was going through paved the way for time to come.

Me and Sharat did a road trip to Chandigarh to meet Chatty who is a smart young chap and was working on a few projects with us.

March 2018

March started with great pace, and the first significant thing that I did was a trip to Hong Kong with my team.

It was a conference that we attended it as an official media partner.

We also tested a lot of new stuff like:

Podcasts Twitter chat

Podcasts and videos are going to one of the prime targets for 2019.

I also met Gary Illyes, Abhishek, Honey Singh and Fernando at different venues and events in the month of March:

April and May 2018

These two months were pretty busy with managing my finances and restructuring the company.

By the end of April, I moved away from managing the finances of my company which turned out to be a great decision. I also moved my whole blogging business to the newly formed company rather than managing under my name, something that paved the way for better structuring in the times to come.

This is the time when I shared my intention with my team of stepping down from the role of CEO of ShoutDreams and bringing someone knowledgeable to run the company so that I could focus on things that I like.

I could feel the pressure of increasing demand for growing the company and keeping up with writing content.

Honestly, running day-to-day operations was becoming a challenge. I had never felt so much pressure. Even though I knew the right thing to do, I was not sure what to do.

I could feel it in my heart that I was not enjoying what I was doing and that my business and life required some major changes.

The question I kept asking myself repeatedly were:

Do I really need to do this? Do I really need to build the company? What’s next for ShoutMeLoud?

On the one hand, I knew it was an important thing to do considering the way we do business online was shifting. On the other hand, I felt I was getting too business-oriented and was losing my freedom.

I could feel the requirement of having more key players on my team. Maybe a content guy, a video editor, a graphics guy, maybe an app developer. However, I was not enjoying the part where I had to spend time hiring and letting go of people.

The pressure of running the company was taking a toll on my overall performance. Moreover, I was not sure what I wanted from my life anymore. I had not yet confronted my inner demons and was trying to ignore them as much as I could.

To add to my troubles, Shallu (my wife) met with an accident and hurt her back in April 2018. She was bed-ridden for 3 whole months. When this happened, for the first time in many, many, years, I was really scared. Seeing someone you love in pain is heart-wrenching. I’m sure you can resonate with that.

I was struggling with everything. It was not the best place to be, but I can’t deny the importance of that phase in my career.

I realized I should be spending more time working. Honestly, I was starting to enjoy work again, and I knew it was time to make some changes. I rented a space in co-working office called Regus and worked from there for a month.

It was a boring place to be, but I was still happy as I was breaking out of procrastination and getting work done.

I worked from this space for almost a month. I discontinued with it later because it was becoming too corporate – more like a 9-5 job!

One highlight of April was addressing the audience at MindmineSummit.

June 2018

June is usually an action-packed month for me. In June 2018, I traveled to Helsinki to attend the SummerJam by SEMRUSH. SummerJam is a private event by SEMRUSH where they invite some of the best minds from the SEO and marketing industry.

It was great connecting with like-minded people in Helsinki. Here are some pictures from the event.

I also met Victoria, former affiliate manager of SEMRUSH, who currently works with Supermetrics.

If you don’t remember her, here is the video we did together last year about affiliate marketing for businesses.

youtube

Another highilght was this “Blogging birthday cake” sent by my friend, which made my day:

July 2018 – Half cooked Europe trip

After the Summer Jam, I planned to travel to Europe for a month with my family. It was one of our dream trips. From Helsinki, we went to Amsterdam and Prague. The plan was to travel to more places.

However, on the 9th day when I was in Prague, one of my key team member shared his intention of saying goodbye. I already felt I wasn’t doing justice to my role and this news couldn’t have come at a worse time.

We abandoned the rest of the trip and returned to India. I realized how important it was for me to resolve the burning question of the future of the company – putting up the system in place, ensuring everyone gets proper growth and credit for their work. I wish I could have done this more pro-actively a few years back, but as I said, I was no one to complain about how my life was unfolding. More on this later.

August

Half of the year was gone, and I could feel the pressure of not doing anything significant.

It doesn’t matter how well one is doing financially or growing if the ❤ is not in sync with the mind. It’s struggle.

👆🏻was my state of mind, and the first thing I did was change my office space. I found a nice place near my home called Instaoffice where I rented a spot.

It was a dream office and I enjoyed being there from day one.

Instead of planning, I started getting things done.

But I had accumulated a lot of questions in the past few months, and the answers were nowhere to be found. The worst decision one can take is not taking any decision, and I was doing exactly that.

As it is, I was not feeling super pumped up about much I was doing. Existential crisis along with mid-life crisis, it was a pretty awkward place to be in.

In the past 12 months, I lost two key players from my team, and I was failing to put up system and process. I was facing a new issue every day.

At the stage I was, it was not easy for me to open up to anyone and tell them what I was going through. I was feeling lonely, but I didn’t let anything affect my day-to-day activities. It felt like depression but I’m glad it wasn’t.

I was losing the whole perspective of my journey. I was unsure of what would happen next.

But life always has something to offer.

One gets help when he/she least expects, and this is what happened in August.

I opened up to a few close people and told them what I was going through.

“Are you enjoying what you are doing?”

A friend asked me this simple question, and straight away I knew the answer – No!

I was doing a lot of things that I wasn’t enjoying.

For example, working 9-6 thinking that working more was a solution.

Waiting for weekends to live life!

I was trying to live a perfect life which was not me. I was living someone else’s life.

I was not able to write regularly, because my heart was not in sync and nothing makes me better than journaling.

We discussed things, and after a lot of questions and introspection over the new few days, I realized I was doing the exact opposite of what my heart said.

Working 9-6 was not me, and there I was, forcing myself to work more thinking that was the solution.

Rather than looking at my problems with the lens of solving it, I was harsh on myself.

I was being cornered by my ego. I was not ready to accept my shortcomings.

Instead of keeping my blogging journey fun, being thankful for whatever I have, I was focused more on the things that I wasn’t able to accomplish.

Throughout, I knew I don’t enjoy doing some of those things and rather than asking “How” to solve it, I was looking at “Why” I couldn’t do it.

This is where I started following the mantra“Do what, heart says”.

I accepted the situation, and started to take it easy from there.

I started accepting that I’m good with some things and not so good at other things.

Believe it or not, this mere acceptance changed everything for me.

Working more was not a solution and sometimes taking a step back or slowing down is the best thing to do.

I needed a change. A significant shift in my mindset, and I needed to be at a new place.

What do I really want to do?

From here on, I started making every decision based on the question above.

That one simple thing (“Do what your heart says”) changed the course for the rest of my year and probably my life.

It drastically changed everything!

September – The African Safari and Brighton SEO

I had planned my trip to Kenya a long time ago and even though I had to move major mountains in my business, I didn’t cancel this 9-day trip.

Why?

Because I badly needed a change and deep down I always wanted to experience the Great African Safari.

On the 1st of September, I flew to Nairobi, Kenya, and something was waiting for me.

A new beginning!

Kenya reminded me of India 20 years back. Everything was so raw, natural and pure.

The next few days were full of African adventures.

“The Game Drive”, as they call it, had us travel in the jungle on a safari.

Being in the arms of nature was such an enchanting experience. It reminded me of this famous quote which was part of my social media bio for years:

Every morning in Africa, a gazelle wakes up. It knows it must run faster than the fastest lion or it will be killed. Every morning a lion wakes up. It knows it must outrun the slowest gazelle or it will starve to death. It doesn’t matter whether you are a lion or a gazelle: when the sun comes up, you’d better be running.

For days, I completely forgot who I’m. Something was happening to me. I don’t have words to explain those changes. After months of self-loathing, I was truly free!

This is the same time I started practicing Yoga, and I made a commitment to wake up before sunrise. This was another landmark decision of 2018 for me as it positively impacted my health and overall awareness. I would take this moment to thank Rohit for being my Yoga guru.

At the end of the month, I attended the BrightonSEO. It was the 2nd event for me of the year, and I realized how much I enjoyed attending such events.

Apart from learnings, such events are the best place to meet people who walk the same path as me.

October: DMSS Bali and Lasik eye surgery

After returning from the Brighton SEO, I went straight to Bali to attend DMSS. I was particularly excited about the mastermind which was one of its kind and my first ever. DMSS Bali turned out to be more than a digital marketing event. I have written a detailed experience here.

I met so many amazing people and discovered a lot of stuff about running and managing a remote company. I realized how silly I was by trying to fix things which were not even broken. Another key learning is to surround ourselves with people who are on a similar boat.

Andrea also took me for my first ever surfing experience, and I absolutely loved it.

Lasik Eye surgery

Another highlight of the year was letting go of my eye-glasses. It’s been more 20 years that I have been wearing glasses, and finally, I got the lasik eye surgery done.

so happy that the surgery was successful and now I’m writing this without having anything between my screen and eyes. A huge thanks to Dr. Dariel Mathur.

November: The Change

By November, I was in the doer mode. I was making quick decisions, and my year-long procrastination attitude was long gone.

To make better decisions in life, we need information. If you don’t have the right information, you will end up trying too many times before giving up or keep trying. DMSS Bali has given me the information which I needed to make better decisions, and I realized it was time for me to step up the game.

My experiment with “surrender to the life” had begun again and from the “why is it..