#so today for example

[hello-yue-here]

hi i hate adobe premiere and adobe audition thats all

#no its not ur gonna read the tags and find out exactly why i hate them #because i get these for free because of my school or whatever right so i have to use them for my classes #and as a film major #i use these A LOT #and i am in THREE production courses this semester (two is the most ppl usually take at once but i decided to make my life hard) #so as u can imagine i have a LOT of projects to do that require premiere and audition (the video and audio editing suites from adobe) #AND EVERY FUCKING TIME #i always end up with half of my footage mysteriously disappearing EVEN THOUGH i triple save everything and make sure its all there- #-before i close the program SO LET ME KNOW HOW WHEN IM POSITIVE MY SHITS RIGHT HALF OF IT IS GONE THE NEXT DAY. HOW. HOW DOES IT HAPPEN. #it also just decides to like ruin al my projects right #so today for example #i wanted to add some reverb to an audio track right nothing major literally so simple #and i go to hit apply #AND AUDITION JUST ??? REMOVES ALL OF THE SOUND ALL TOGETHER???? WHAT???? #i was so lost #i saved my project and went to submit it and ONCE AGAIN it is soundless but it says an audio is playing but theres nothing #so i go back to audition and everything fine! #i double check how i saved i looked up the proper save procedure just in case i did something to just not save the audio #which again- how can i possibly save a SILENT AUDIO FILE like thats literally just a file of nothing #so i decide fuck it its 3 am and im tired im just gonne record the finished audio file in my VOICE RECORDING APP ON MY PHONE just in case #if i have to whip out my phone during class to present this im actually gonna stand in front of a stampede of bulls

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[bicheetopuff]

I guess it’s this kids birthday so I’m gonna remind you what character development can do to a mf

He deserves to be happy

#bakudeku #bnha #bkdk #bakugou katsuki #bnha spoilers #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #I had so many other examples #I literally spent an hour trying to narrow down all the panels to just ten #I’m also posting a fic later but I still have to edit so I thought I’d post something incase I don’t get the fic done today oops

[nightswatchdisbandmentera]

Underrated reason why Lyanna as the KotLT just works is because it follows a pattern of deconstruction re the concept of knightly chivalry and honor, from Lyanna herself to her son 15yrs+ later. Lyanna as the KotLT is a gender-swapped version of the ‘knight rescues a helpless maiden from raucous bullies’ trope, but grrm of course puts his spin on it because one Lyanna is not even a knight to begin with and two, she’s a girl. Then knight!Lyanna fights the bullies which is again an adaptation of another trope: the ‘mysterious knight-errant enters the joust and wins then dips’, which is interesting because these types of knights sometimes fall into the black knight trope. And the black knight is, more often than not, not the hero. But the main reason why this is so interesting is Jon. Lyanna “cosplays” a black knight, but her son Jon later becomes an actual black knight. Jon then repeats his mother’s actions by defending Sam in AGoT, which is another subversion of the aforementioned ‘knight rescues a helpless maiden trope’ because the helpless maiden in this case is a helpless…lad…Though Jon and Lyanna acting as agents outside the bounds of knighthood (Lyanna being a northern woman and Jon being a member of the NW) puts them more in line with the traditional black knight (who is usually an anti-hero/villain), the actual essence of their actions puts them closer to the more valiant and honorable white knight according to tradition.

#asoiaf #in my arthuriana feels today 😃 #was gonna add that this trope repeats itself with jaime-brienne which I guess is the more traditional romantic version?? #and brienne looking for sansa as a subversion of the trope #does that count? #anyway this knight errant trope continues when rhaegar-the valiant prince/evil dragon-kidnaps/rescues the maiden #so another performance of romance and chivalry #and that example ALSO leads to jon lmao because it becomes the ultimate manifestation #of the valiant knight/prince/hero trope which is also a deconstruction because jon doesn’t look like it outwardly #or whatever idk hope that makes sense #jon snow #lyanna stark #valyrianscrolls #my stuff

[thecryptidart1st]

Wanna know something that just gave me a crisis? (/hj)

Events of FNAF 3 would be taking place this year.

i’m aware

#self doodle #answering asks #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #michael afton #mike schmidt #springtrap #william afton #fnaf 3 is probably the penultimate example of soldered wires lore mixing into canon #because its just mike having panic attacks realizing his father is alive #i have a whole fight sequence between mike and william on night 6 when fazbear frights goes up in smokes #i have 2 different songs in my head that i’ve saved specifically to address fnaf 3 #one of these images was an unreleased year of the spring rabbit sketch that i cleaned up #the other three existed in my head so long i had to sketch them today #i still feel guilt that i had to stop yotsr but at the same time i recognize i cant do daily art ;3; #soldered wires #soldered wires au

[honorthysalad]

Seems like Yoshiki’s eyes are starting to lose shape whenever he’s stressed out, starting with his left pupil getting more jagged when he’s putting back ‘Hikaru’s head in ch22, and then in ch24, his left iris moves to the side.

#I did think the right could’ve been an eye shine or whatever #But applying parsimony to this #I can only find one example of Yoshiki having an eye shine (ch13 when he’s talking to Mikasa about kaourus yukata) #So it would be very atypical for him to be draw with one #However him becoming more and more inhuman is an important plot point #So it would be less to presumptuous to think these are connected scenes of Yoshiki becoming more like ‘hikaru’ in regard #Of having his left eye shift when he grows upset #Than moku was feeling a little silly today and gave him an eye shine #the summer hikaru died #hgsn #hikaru ga shinda natsu #hgsn spoilers #my hgsn shit #HGSN eyes #Once again having a ‘who’s glasses are these in ch10’ moment #Wherein I’m scouring pages looking for times Yoshiki has an eye shine #In order to dispel the strawman I put up myself #If you have any more examples of eye shine Yoshiki or Yoshiki w/ messed up eyes #Feel free to add to this post w/ them

[mickeysclubhouse]

mickmin + love languages ♡

#animationedit #disneyedit #disneydaily #disneynetwork #userlarri #fyeahdisney #disneygifsdaily #disneyfeverdaily #bigfrozensix #animationsource #mickey mouse #minnie mouse #*mygifs #made this in honour of their birthday today #also why is choosing scenes so hard?!?! #like there was numerous examples for some of these.

[lightbulb-warning]

You are so cool

Let's discuss shuichi and the possibility of bisexual shuichi

*cough*

"possibility"?? uhh- *calculation noises* ...VERY HIGH.

#/silly #feel free to reblog this with more shuichi being a bi disaster examples i know they're out there #shuichi saihara #one day ill be able to express my enjoyment of characters and concepts verbally. today? it's just gonna be memes. #i have many thoughts about him they are endless and none of them are coherent enough to write down OTL ;; a tragedy... #i care this loser so much #saihara shuichi #dr shuichi #also YOUR FACE is cool circuslemon!! >:0 take that!!!!! /lh #ask maiora #maiora shitposts #drv3

[renfriscreyden]

the thing about samfrodo is that on the one hand it's such an important example of intimate male friendship that's loving and tender but on the other hand: those hobbits are kind of gay

#like examples of close friendship are so important!! truly!! let them be comfortable and tender with each other!! #on the other hand uhm. i can carry you. i would follow you until the ends of the earth. UHM #this thought brought to you by me watching the extended versions of the fellowship and two towers for the first time today #the fellowship of the ring #the two towers #lotr #lord of the rings #frodo baggins #samwise gamgee #samfrodo

[evilkaeya]

being depressed sucks ass because there's so many things I wanna do but I just can't

#in my mind i want to work on my assignment #not should but WANT #I WANT TO FUNCTION LIKE A REGULAR PERSON IN SOCIETY #but it's so hard. even bringing myself to shower or eat is like. so much work #anyways i finsihed derry girls #cheers to that #it was amazing #deserved more seasons #I'm going to watch bes next #maybe not starting today but i will #is it even depression because I'm not sad #I'm just not doing things that normal people do normally #and while i feel shit abt it it's not making me sad #right now for example I'm only having pomegranates and a scrambled egg for dinner

[raytorosaurus]

this is another one of the parts of ntlis that really stuck with me :((. part of why it irritates me when ppl overlook the role everyone in the band played to the music's themes and emotions and messages, not only gerard. they all put a lot of themselves into it. it's my chemical romance, not gerard way and the hormones - and lyrics aren't the only way for musicians to express things really deeply and earnestly.

#for example ray will be the first to acknowledge he's not a naturally talented lyricist but remember the laughter is so. soooooo. #emotive and raw and honest. even if some of the lyrics are cliched or clumsy #and mcr songs would be nothing without ray not just bc he's a really talented guitarist but bc HE PERSONALLY is Part of the band yk... #anyway. meds r hitting today time to actually use this to do some real work KSKDMFKDJ. #ray toro #mcr talk #interview #ntlis #frank iero #also that coming from frank 🥹🥹🥹 #gb #mcr history #sui ment

[viiinz]

autism be damned my boy can do calligraphy and knows a lot about capital punishment

#prince myshkin #lev nikolayevitch myshkin #the idiot #myshkin #no but i really think there are legitimate reasons to argue that myshkin could be seen as an autistic character #other than the fact that he literally checks of every criteria #there's also the fact that there is a frequent comorbidity of epilepsy and autism #which makes me think (tho i have not nearly done enough research on this to make any actual claims) #that there is a possibility that traits which we would today associate with autism could back in the day #before the term autism even existed #could be seen as something common among epicleptic people #and given that myshkin is already canonically neurodivergent and epileptic #it really isn't a stretch to say that if we were to apply modern day terminology on a 19th century character #he could be seen as an early example of an autistic character #which makes it very interesting to note how people in the book view and interact with him #(and even without the possible autism he's still a canon neurodivergent character cast as the protagonist in a 19th century book #which on its own is really interesting #especially considering the fact that dostoyevsky drew from experiences with his own epilepsy) #for example canon infantilization (which this post is definitely a joke on) the whole 'idiot' thing etc. #also the way he views himself! he has so much internalised ableism #i also think it's interesting that another character that exhibits a lot of autistic traits is kirillov #who's also canonically epileptic #my post #vince talks

[fitzrove]

Lol today i learned (while doing German homework) that the whimsical Finnish word "tilpehööri" (= additional trinkets or random things that come along with something else) actually comes from the Swedish tillbehör which is equivalent to the extremely commonly used German Zubehör

#not exactly the same meaning but similar #petition to create 'tsupehööri'... #i already joke with my parents that i'm going to start speaking like 19th century finnish immigrants to america and/or ppl along the swedis #border (also in the 19th century) #(= speaking old-timey finglish/swennish where you make english or swedish words into finnish w pronunciation/spelling) #liisasin tänään tsaitungista että tsuukistraikki jatkuu vii'immä #etc #so yeah lets make this a thing pls /J #ashhdhj translations: #liisasin = [ich habe] gelesen #tsaitungista = in der Zeitung #tsuukistraikki = Zugstreik #vii'immä = wie immer #i'm having so much fun with this xDD #(so my example sentence would be 'i read today in the paper that the train strike keeps going like always') #languages #random

[daisybrained]

hmmmm..... do you think.... there might be..... a reason...... for that..............

#mlvns: are we so out of touch? 🤔 no its the duffers who are wrong #i want to start a compilation post of mlvns running face first into the point and still missing it bc ive seen. Several examples today #byler #will negativity #sadly :/ #anti mileven #mlvn #st reddit

[assim-eu-sou]

Something else I came across on the reread that I feel really foreshadows how the epilogue will play out is this:

“I know I’ll never marry, never risk bringing a child into the world. Because if there’s one thing being a Victor doesn’t guarantee, it’s your children’s safety. My kids’ names would go right into the reaping balls with everyone else’s. And I swear I’ll never let that happen.”

Following this quote, Katniss’ entire concept of romantic companionship and the creation of a family in her future is built around the existence of the games. When the games are abolished, nevers become possible.

Trust me, I’m the first person to look at an ending where the leading lady ends up with The Man and they have kids and it’s happily ever after with suspicion, but this time, it’s different. After a lifetime of fear, Katniss allows herself hope, because she can finally afford it. And I think that’s worth a lot.

#it’s something I see a lot today too #not for me I straight up just faint imagine creating a consciousness like naur now the burden of someone being alive is on me #cant not faint help #but for others it’s a certain condition that is holding them back #climate change for example #so in a magical world where that got fixed I think those people bringing children into the world WOULD be a triumph #but idk I feel like everyone has to have their opinion on the epilogue so why not throw mine into the ring #ring? #thg #the hunger games #katniss everdeen #everlark #vaguely

[smalltimidbean]

The opposite to giant and monstrous Chase Pep and Hangry Fiend - Sopping Wet Creature Pep and Beanlette Fiend!

Idk what Fiend is hissing at, but it is probably something that is upsetting to (or will potentially further upset) Pep

Or someone called them cute, who knows

#sona tag #oc: fake bean #Beanlette Fiend is about as threatening as a feral kitten but they still have quite the bite to them! #it is also much more likely for both Pep and Fiend to turn into their small forms at the same time #since they both get stressed out by similar things like fireworks for example #Fiend has a bit more control over the change than Pep but they'd also probably change in solidarity for their friend #even at the risk of being called cute or getting picked up and getting unwanted affection #any ways today was weird so something silly bc I can't focus on anything I should be working on kjdkdg #fake peppino