iamhappybutsad96
iamhappybutsad
"Power resides where men believe it resides. No more and no less." - A Song of Ice and Fire Book Two: A Clash of Kings, George R.R. Martin
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2piecesnackbox
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𝚆𝙴𝙻𝙲𝙾𝙼𝙴 𝙾𝙱𝙻𝙸𝚅𝙸𝙾𝙽
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Tell me, can you hear my voice?
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I Love Pink
In 2017, I wrote this post called, I Hate Pink. It was basically a rant on gender roles that my family tried to impose on me. In the same post, I stated that I don’t hate the color per se, just the stereotypes that came with it due to my conservative upbringing.
Fast forward to 2022, we come to this post where I’m going to declare that I love pink. If you’re keeping tabs on the Philippines (or…
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Been A While
As I was going on about my daily routine today, I suddenly remembered the existence of this blog.
The first thing I did was check the last time I ever wrote anything here. Turns out, that was all the way back in 2019! And I only had one post that year too! Whew! Some of you who will read this may not know me personally and just assume a lot has been going in my life since the last time I visited…
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Obligatory Post
A few more hours until we enter a new decade, I’ve realized I didn’t make a single post on this blog this year. Truthfully, I just haven’t found the energy or desire to write anything on this blog. I have been considering abandoning this altogether. But maybe, it’s not time yet.
Speaking of writing, I haven’t been writing on her not because I have lost passion for writing. In fact, I have done a…
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Before The Year Ends Hello. I don't come here as often as I used to so before the year ends, let me at least make it two posts for 2018.
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Changes
Hello.
It’s almost a year since I updated this blog. Well, a lot happened. After my college graduation, I went to Cebu to get much-needed rest after all the life that were drained out of me. I did some, well a lot, of babysitting (for free) when one of my sisters gave birth and when I was asked for a favor by my oldest sister to take her son to his school. When not taking care of my nephew and…
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I Hate Pink
I hate pink. Well, I don’t hate the color per se. I hate it for what it reminds me of. As a kid, my favorite color was red. It became green until I’ve settled with blue being my favorite. Every time I was asked by my family what color I wanted for a certain item, I never said pink. Most of the time, I picked things that were blue. I was often called out by my sisters for not choosing a “girly…
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#blue#color#colors#family#friends#gender roles#gender stereotype#gender stereotyping#LGBTQ#life#pink#school#sisters#society
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Self-Doubt
Gone are the days where I was enclosed in a system… or am I really? You’d think graduating from college meant I’d be free from the system that drove me insane. But truthfully, I just became part of another system after graduation. The “system of adulting” has given me this tremendous anxiety, almost crippling yet I continue to function. The fact that I have no direction in life makes everything…
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Reminiscing Night Part 8 It was first semester of junior year when I took up a microbiology class. My laboratory classes were always in the morning.
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An End To Childhood
An End To Childhood
I’ve been crying nonstop for the past couple of minutes because of my cat’s death. See Banban is more than just some cat I found on our balcony. I’ve had Banban since fifth grade, and now I’m graduating from college. It feels somehow poetic that she dies when I’m about to graduate and about to leave for Cebu and start anew with life. My sister just told me that Banban bid farewell to me because…
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We've Come Full Circle
We’ve Come Full Circle
We’ve come full circle, dear. I still vividly remember how I found you. It was the first Monday after the TV premiere of High School Musical 2. I just got home from school and I was singing “You Are The Music In Me”, specifically the “na na na” part. While singing, I swore I could hear a cat meowing. I paused and listened, I heard nothing. Thinking I was imagining it, I continued to sing and I…
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It's June
It’s June
Oh shoot! Half of the year is almost over. Cliché, but it really feels like it was just yesterday I was waiting in line during enrollment, now I’m three weeks away from graduation. Life after college still frightens me. I’m unsure of what to do. My closest sister says I can stay with them while I decide what to do with my life. There’s nothing I else that I really want to do other than write. In…
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Sense Of Dread
It’s the final day of April which means only a few weeks before the school year ends, which also means I’m graduating (that is if I don’t fail any subjects). Realizing that, I am met with the sense of dread and severe anxiety for the future. It has been clear that I don’t know what I’m doing after college. I’m not heading to any graduate school or to any medical school. While I took and passed…
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Awareness
Yesterday, I saw my friend post a suicide awareness message and obviously, as a person who’s quite suicidal – okay, very suicidal – I copied and re-posted it. As of writing, there have been fourteen people who reacted to this. Except for one – who I got this post originally from – I checked if any of the other thirteen people who reacted actually did the instruction at the end of the post.…
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Abandoned
… And the house is quiet again. The holiday season started with my closest sister, Mammy, and her husband coming home. Then, my oldest sister and her husband and kid came home with my two-year older sister. We spent Christmas without two of my sisters (one is in Canada and the other in Cebu because of work). Then by New Year, only one sister was missing. The house was noisy (mostly because my…
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The Velvet
 I’ve been listening to K-Pop girl group Red Velvet for the past hour. I am currently listening to their The Velvet album and got the strangest feeling on my stomach and chest. I’ve figured out why. “The Velvet” was released on March 17 this year (supposedly March 16 but got delayed and Red Velvet stans get triggered by this). I like the album a lot in contrast to most who did not like it…
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Holiday Season
It’s the holiday season and it means gathering of my sexists, Duterte loyalists, Marcos apologists (and maybe even racists) family members. My family members started coming home last Saturday and within three days there was already quite the amount of sexism said by them. For one, my newest brother-in-law said that he liked the improvement of the national highway from Ormoc to our town that he…
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#Christmas#Donald Trump#Duterte#family#gender roles#holidays#life#politics#racism#racist#Rodrigo Duterte#sexism#sexist#Trump
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