#“causing a disturbance” lmaooo

[mint-yooxgi]

{2} - Written in the Stars - Yandere!Idol!Yeosang X Tall!Chubby!Reader

Soft Yandere AU & Idol AU

Genre: Mature, Horror, Angst, Fluff, Slight Humor, Slow Burn

Pairing: Yeosang X Reader (ft. platonic Ateez ensemble)

Words: 16,875

Warnings: Slow burn. This story is going to be very self indulgent on my part, so please bear with the first few chapters. Mentions of Jonghyun. Fatshaming, name-calling (not done by any male idols), Wendy and Irene of RV are bitches towards OC, OC is a bit of a 'pick-me' girl but oh well. I think that's all. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: Shamelessly, this part is probably even more self indulgent that the first lmaooo I apologize in advance for that. Still, I do hope you enjoy it, as I had a really fun time writing this chapter out. I actually had to split it, as originally I was going to make all of chapter two both the rehearsal day and actual performance of the award's show.

Also, gentle reminder that I don’t do tag lists.

Disclaimer: The first little portion of this chapter when the OC is speaking is implied that the OC is speaking in English. It is not until OC arrives at the venue where the following takes effect:

"This represents a line spoken in Korean."

"Bolded represents a line spoken in English."

"Bolded and italics represents a line spoken in Japanese."

Mini Masterlist - Part One

“Hello, everyone!” Your smiling face stares back at you from the screen of your phone as you go live on instagram. “I’m just on my way to rehearsal right now.”

The low voice of your publisher in the front seat reaches your ears, telling you not to talk so loudly while in the car.

“Oops, my bad,” you chuckle, turning back to face the camera. “Anyways, I wanted to do a brief live like this since I’ll be busy for the rest of today and tomorrow. I won’t be able to have my biweekly live on Friday night tomorrow cause of my event.”

Your eyes scan the comments, a small quirk to your lips.

“What event you say?” Your eyes gleam with mischievousness. “Well, as a few of you may or may not know, I’m in South Korea right now. I’ve been asked to perform an original piece of writing at the award’s show tomorrow night.”

A giddy smile stretches across your features.

“I know! I’m so excited!” You cheer. “It’s such a high honour to have been asked to create and perform a piece of written work for the show.”

A comment catches your attention briefly.

“I mean, I’m not sure if I’ll be hanging around any idols, but we’re all there to do a job, so I wouldn’t want to disturb anyone if that’s the case.” You reply, eyes briefly looking out of the window at the passing scenery. “As to if Mark Lee will be there or not, I’m not sure. If NCT is set to perform, then probably. I only know of a few select artists that will be there.”

A flood of ‘who’s and ‘omg really’s appear in your comments, a few popping up in different languages such as Korean and Japanese. You remain speaking English for now, but the other comments still make you smile. You’d just rather surprise everyone that watches tomorrow with your language skills.

“Why, whoever’s on the website listings, of course!” You wink playfully, shoulders shaking in laughter. “Nah, even if I did know, I’m not at liberty to say.”

That grin never leaves your lips as you scan the comments once more.

“Let’s see…” your eyes flit back and forth as you pick a question to answer. There seems to be one popping up repeatedly, more so than the rest. “Is it true you were on the same flight as Ateez heading to Korea?”

Your eyebrows raise slightly, amusement dancing on your features.

“Was I?” You hum, the familiar sight of those heads peeking over their seats filling your vision for the briefest of moments. “I don’t recall.”

Though, with the wink you send the camera, your comments are flooded once again.

“Nah, I’m just playing.” A knowing grin stretches across your features. “They’re all really nice people. Friendly, too. They are people after all, which I feel like a lot of others tend to forget about their idols. I don’t know why it’s so hard in general to treat others with basic dignity and respect.”

Immediately, your defence squad rolls in, asking if you’re okay and if something happened.

“I’m fine, everyone! Really!” You smile at how enthusiastic they are in protecting you. “It was more of a general comment than anything.”

Of course you don’t really want to divulge the small incidents you’ve already incurred while being in the country. You know that South Korea has a very lookism centric society, but even when you’re prepared for it, you still cannot help the way certain interactions make you feel. The looks you receive from the older crowd, many of them muttering under their breaths while shaking their heads, sometimes do not go unnoticed.

You may be a popular author, but not everyone knows who you are. Nor is everyone willing to accept the way you look, unfortunately.

Then again, it would probably hurt less if you didn’t understand what some of them were saying. Though, you will never forget when you were in a café the other day, and two taller women came up to you who didn’t necessarily fit into those typical Korean beauty standards. They were a little thicker than those around them, and goodness, were they gorgeous. The fact that both of them were your fans, and thanked you for giving them more confidence with your writing, and just who you are in general, really made your day. You could never forget them, even if you tried.

Thinking back on it now, a small smile pulls at your features.

“What am I thinking about?” You hum, noticing a few comments, only for your eyes to go wide. “My Ateez bias?” You laugh, shaking your head in amusement. “I mean…” you tilt your head, teasing smile pulling at your lips. “Well, if you know, you know.” A wink. “But nah, I’m thinking of a really lovely interaction I had the other day with two women at a café. Saeyoung, Haesoo, if you’re watching, thank you for making my day!”

The two weeks leading up to this point in time have been fairly hectic for you. Between settling into your new apartment, getting used to the time difference, and writing for your new novel, you’ve barely had time to relax. Not to mention the hours you’ve spent practicing your performance for tomorrow. You’ve barely had time to visit your friends, yet.

On the other hand, you’ve been messaging quite a few people quite often lately. 

The first few days after exchanging contact information with Ateez were a little silent, but you just chalked that up to busy schedules on all of your parts. However, you weren’t expecting Hongjoong to message you in the middle of the night complaining about a song he just couldn’t get right.

Needless to say, he wasn’t expecting you to respond so quickly. In fact, he had been surprised that you had still been up at three in the morning. Only, when you explained the jet lag, and the fact that you had also been working on your writing, he understood. You’ve both sort of become night owl buddies now, messaging each other when you’re working on projects until the early hours of the morning. A hilarious fact, especially when you both start chastising the other for not getting enough sleep.

Then came the group chat.

You woke up one day to at least seventy-five Kaotalk messages from a new chat. Thinking it had been an emergency of some sort, your heart rate had skyrocketed. Only, you soon found out that it was just the guys speculating what you could be doing since you weren’t responding to any of them at two in the afternoon.

The moment you sent them a meme of a tired cat waking up with squinting eyes, and a message that only said, ‘wtf’, the real chaos began. 

Wooyoung is convinced that he’s your Ateez bias, immediately rubbing it in the other’s faces. At that, you promptly received selfies from Seonghwa, Mingi, and Yunho just ‘casually’ wanting your opinion on them before they posted them to their instagram and twitter accounts. You also received photos of what each of the guys were doing from Hongjoong, telling you that this was the chaos you incited by finally responding.

Yeosang would comment one liners here and there that would absolutely knock the shit right out of you. The way this man had near perfect timing still amazes you, laughing to yourself every time you think back on his responses.

Both Jongho and Wooyoung are the most talkative in the group chat, but Jongho tends to message you a lot outside of it, anyways. More so than Hongjoong now, considering his main thing was that he didn’t want to bother you at first with his thousand and one questions about your writing.

You found out later it was both Hongjoong and Yeosang keeping him in line.

Mingi and you share anime recommendations when you can, and you’ve even started planning a day where you’ll binge some of your favourite shows together. You heard that San may or may not tag along, but that’s yet to be decided.

Speaking of San, he’s one of the most quiet in the group chat. You assume it’s probably because out of all of them, he’s the one you spent the least amount of time talking to. You cannot fault him for that; you both hardly know each other.

Yunho likes to crack jokes every now and then, along with Seonghwa, but they’re both really level headed guys from what you’ve gathered so far. They like to flirt, but not nearly as much as Wooyoung does. Besides, with the two older members, you can tell it’s just friendly, so you have no problem teasing them back. Wooyoung, on the other hand, you can’t be too sure. Though, if it truly bothered you, you’d get him to stop.

“Anyways, we’re getting closer to the venue, so I’m sadly going to have to say goodbye for now.” A dramatic pout pulls at your lips. “I know! I promise to do another live soon, and I’ll answer some questions about my newest novel and upcoming works then.”

The way the chat immediately starts flooding with happy messages and people saying they’re looking forward to it makes your heart swell in your chest.

“Alright, lovelies,” you smile just as the car pulls into the parking lot. “Thanks for tuning in. See you next time!”

With a final wave at the camera, you’re ending the live.

Letting out a low sigh, you tuck your phone back into your side pocket. Grabbing your purse, you notice that you’ve pulled up to the side entrance of the venue. Both you and your publisher step out of the vehicle, thanking the driver all the while.

Immediately, you’re greeted by security who escorts you inside and to the backstage area. Your publisher talks lowly with the head of staff, ensuring all of the requirements are met and getting all of the details you may need for now. They’re really only here to drop you off and then head back out for the day. Besides, the event organizer and stage manager will look after you if need be.

You follow quietly behind, taking in the space of the venue as more staff mill about. A few recognize you as you walk passed, their eyes lighting up as you shoot them a polite smile in return. Some of them must be on break currently, for you can see snacks and drinks scattered around a few the deeper into the arena you get.

Finally, you reach backstage.

“So, all of the groups are currently occupying the green rooms, or milling about. That means, unfortunately, you won’t be getting one to yourself.” The head stage manager turns to you once you reach them, speaking in English for the moment. “You’re more than welcome to observe the soundcheck from the floor, or from the seats instead of staying back here the whole time, as well.”

“Please, don’t feel like you have to speak in English for my sake.” You say, noticing how you catch all of the staff off guard with your Korean. “I can speak and understand Korean. So please, let’s all speak comfortably. Thank you for hosting me and including me in such a monumental show.” You bow politely in their direction. “The room situation most certainly will not be a problem. I don’t mind at all. Just tell me where to go, and when, and I will do my best to stay out of everyone’s way.”

You can hear the familiar boom of music from the stage area reaching your ears, though it’s more of a background noise right now.

The stage manager nods approvingly in your direction, a smile pulling at their features. “I understand. Thank you for being so accommodating. I cannot stay and talk long, for I’m needed elsewhere, but help yourself to drinks and refreshments. If you need any help, Riley will be more than happy to assist you. She’s been assigned to be your personal assistant today.”

At their words, a girl with long, chestnut hair steps forward. A giddy smile rests on her features, and you can see her visibly shaking in excitement.

“Hello,” she bows, addressing you formally. “It’s very nice to meet you.”

“It’s wonderful to meet you, too, Riley,” you smile, telling her to just call you by your first name to make things easier.

“Alright, well, I’ll be off. Itzy is supposed to be having soundcheck right now, but we’re a bit behind.” The stage manager rushes off after that, speaking quickly into their headset.

“You’re not scheduled until the very end, so you have plenty of time to lounge around and do whatever you’d like.” Riley informs you with a smile.

“Oh, sweet,” you grin back. “Thank you for taking care of me today.”

“Really, it’s no problem at all!” She’s quick to answer. “To be quite honest, I’m a big fan so I jumped at the opportunity to be able to assist you in any way I could.”

“That’s very sweet of you! I really appreciate it.” You nod, moving to stand off to the side so that you’re out of the way.

“Your books are incredible, and reading them gave my boyfriend so much confidence.” She comments, a faint blush beginning to dust her cheeks.

“Ah, really?” Your eyes light up. “That makes me so glad to hear! I’m so happy for the both of you.”

“I can’t wait to tell him that you can speak Korean!” She says, grabbing a water bottle off of the table closest to you and handing it to you. “As long as you’re okay I share that with him, of course.”

“Of course!” You confirm. “By tomorrow night, most people will know, anyways.”

“Oh, are you performing your written piece in Korean, then?” She asks, eyes sparkling as you thank her lowly for the water.

“It’ll be a little bit of a mix,” you tell her, a small smile pulling at your features. “Korean, and English. Though, I contemplated adding Japanese to the speech. I opted out at the last minute.”

“You can speak all three?” Her eyebrows raise, voice incredulous.

“Yes, I can.” You confirm with a nod. “I’m working to learn Mandarin next.”

“That’s incredible!” She praises, and you avert your gaze somewhat bashfully. “I’ve been learning Japanese, but I have a hard time practicing it. Lack of conversation partners, and all that with the way my schedule is.”

“Well, if you’d like to practice with me, I’d be more than happy to help!” You say. “I may not be the best for correcting your pronunciation, but I can most certainly help with conversation practice.”

“Really?” Her eyes flash with excitement. “That would be wonderful, thank you!”

“Would you like to start now, or hold off until later?” The way you ask her this in Japanese catches her slightly off guard.

A blink, and she’s setting her expression into one of determination. “Now would be a good start.”

“Wonderful!” You smile. “So, then, Riley, tell me about your favourite animal.”

“Well, I absolutely adore sharks. I just think they’re really neat, and it’s so sad that some of them get hunted for sport.” She begins, taking a moment to think of her next words carefully. “Half of the time, they’re hunted after attacking a human, but they don’t know any better. I watched a documentary once where it explained that because of their poor…” her brow furrows slightly, “Oh shoot, I can’t remember the word.”

“Eyesight?”You supply, to which she nods, eyes lighting up in recognition. 

“Yes, eyesight!” She replies enthusiastically. “Because of their poor eyesight, humans on top of surfboards look similar to dolphins and other aquatic mammals from below.”

“Oh, I know exactly what you’re talking about!” You nod along with her. “I literally could not agree more. It’s sad that they get hunted just for following their instincts. I understand some of the reasoning behind it, but at the end of the day, you’re right. Sharks are just living and hunting in the wild like they always do.”

“Yes, exactly!” Riley turns to grab another water bottle off of the table for herself. “I just wish more people would understand that.”

“Me too, honestly.” You agree.

“Anyways, enough about me.” She chuckles, somewhat bashfully. “What about you? What is your favourite animal?”

“Oh, that’s easy, it’s-“ the words get stuck in your throat as your own brow furrows this time. You blink, thinking hard. A slight chuckle escapes you, “Now I can’t remember the word.”

“Maybe I know it?” She offers, but at the way she shakes her head once you say the animal, you know she doesn’t know the term.

Luckily for you, someone just so happens to be walking passed you for the moment, and without thinking, you stop them.

“Excuse me, but what’s the word for turtle in Japanese?” You meet the male’s gaze, noticing how stunned he seems to be for the moment.

Blinking, he tells you the word.

Recognition flashes behind your eyes as you turn back to Riley. “Right! Turtles are my favourite animals. I just think they’re so cute.” In the next second, you turn back to the male. “Thank you so much! I couldn’t remember for the life of me.”

“No problem,” he nods, somewhat in shock, before walking away.

Only, when you turn back to Riley, she wears an expression of mild awe on her features.

“I can’t believe you just asked the Yuta of NCT that question so casually.” Her jaw drops, a giggle falling from her lips as you shrug sheepishly.

“He was the closest person around.” You laugh along with her. “Though, I feel like he was expecting me to start freaking out about who he was when I stopped him.”

“Yeah, sometimes the extra staff we hire to help out don’t always act professional around the artists.” Riley explains, a sort of grimace to her features.

“Really? I would have thought there’d be a screening process for that.” You comment, brow mildly furrowed.

“There is, but sometimes they still slip through.” She comments. “That, and some people say they’ll act one way, but then when it comes down to it, act another.”

“Oh, believe me,” you hum in acknowledgement. “That I do know.”

Around you, you can hear some whispers beginning to float around about your arrival. A fact which you find a bit odd, considering you’ve already been at the venue for at least a half hour or so. Out of the corner of your eyes, you notice some more idols beginning to linger about as well.

Just as you go to continue the conversation with Riley, you hear a shout in the background of someone’s name. You watch as her eyes go wide just as you feel a weight jump onto your back.

“Zhong Chenle, you get back here right now!” Whoever it is, they sound mad.

“You’re real! Holy shit!” A voice right by your ear sounds, and you blink in shock, hands naturally coming to support the body now clinging onto your back. “Mark hasn’t been making you up this whole time in some elaborate fever dream!”

“Zhong Chenle!” The angry voice finally caches up to you, and you turn to see Kun from NCT frowning at the younger male clinging like a koala to your back. His gaze softens as he meets your own. “I am so sorry for him. Once Yuta came back to say you had arrived, he darted out of the room to come see for himself.”

“It’s no problem, really,” you laugh, and you notice your response catches them both off guard. “Yes, I can speak Korean.”

Beside you, Riley giggles.

The sound of feet hitting the ground reaches your ears, and you see some more males rushing over to you.

“Way to go, Chenle,” Renjun deadpans. “Way to make a great first impression on Mark’s author friend.”

Softly, you set Chenle back onto his own two feet. A second later, and Kun is reaching over to drag the younger male over to him by his ear. Renjun shakes his head disapprovingly all the while.

“Ow! Kun, stop it! That hurts!” The younger complains, batting the elder’s hand away.

“Once again, I am so sorry for him.” Kun apologizes, and you notice the faintest hue of pink dusting his cheeks.

“Really, it’s no problem,” you assure him, noticing too many pairs of eyes on you now.

You shuffle in your spot, beginning to rub a hand over the side of your one arm nervously.

“If he bothers you again, just come find me and I’ll deal with him.” Kun replies, sending a small smile your way.

You nod. “Thanks, I appreciate it.”

Wordlessly, Kun begins dragging off Chenle, Renjun in tow. 

A few more people step forward.

“Not even a ‘hello’ for your biggest fan?” Mark quirks a brow, walking up to you with both Johnny and Taeyong on either side of him.

Teasingly, you begin to look around the space. “Why? Did you see Jongho from Ateez around?”

Mark looks truly scandalized by your words, his eyebrows raising significantly as his voice almost cracks. “Excuse me?”

“Oh, hi, Mark.” You reply casually, hearing Johnny snort at the intonation you use.

“No, no, I see how it is,” an overdramatic pout pulls at his lips as he crosses his arms over his chest. “Spent all of three months convincing half the guys to read your books and this is the thanks I get once we meet.”

You lowly hear him muttering about how he is your biggest fan, not Jongho from Ateez.

“I don’t know, he was pretty excited when I met him on the plane.”You hum.

“So, you did meet Ateez on the plane ride over here.”Johnny observes, amusement dancing in his gaze.

“I did,” you nod in confirmation. “They’re all very nice.”

You notice Taeyong following along with the conversation, brow furrowed slightly as the music stops for the moment. “I think they just finished soundcheck. They should be back soon.”

“Then I’ll say ‘hello’ to them soon,” you reply, noticing the slight surprise that graces Taeyong’s features at your response. “If I happen to see them.”

“Anyways, it’s so nice to finally meet you!”Mark smiles, and you notice Johnny grinning smugly while nudging him not so subtly with his elbow. “Shut up!”

“What?” Your brow quirks, amusement dancing in your eyes.

“Well, are you going to ask her, or not?”Johnny teases the younger male beside him.

“I’m getting there!” Mark pushes the elder male back slightly.

“What can I do for you, Mark Lee of NCT?” The grin that pulls onto your features says it all.

“I- uh… um…” he stutters over his words, palms nervously rubbing over the thighs of his jeans for the moment.

“Where’s that confidence now, Markie boy?”Johnny laughs before turning to you, completely ignoring the glare the younger sends his way. “Mark wanted to know if you would be willing to give him a hug when you finally met.”

Mark looks about read to strangle Johnny, a bright red lighting up his features.

“Well, why didn’t you just say so!” You chuckle, extending your arms out to him. “Hugs are one my favourite things! As long as you ask first, or I’m offering, I usually don’t mind at all. Besides, I think Chenle technically already beat you to it.”

Mark immediately sinks into your embrace, wrapping his own arms around you and squeezing you tightly. You can feel the chuckle he lets out against your chest as he responds. “Yeah, sorry about that. Again.”

“Really, it’s no worries.” You tell him as he pulls away, holding you at arms length.

“Impromptu piggybacks are kind of his thing when he gets excited.” Taeyong sighs, shaking his head.

“No fair, I want a piggyback ride, too!” A loud voice draws your attention from the side.

Looking over, you see Wooyoung happily skipping over to you, the other members of Ateez in tow. It seems as if they’ve just finished their soundcheck.

“I’m sure it wasn’t a case of her offering,” Yunho chuckles, and you see the red-headed male pout.

“Hello boys, it’s nice to see you again.” You smile, tilting your head politely in acknowledgement.

“How come Hongjoong was the only one to know that you’d be in attendance today and tomorrow?” Jongho crosses his arms over his chest, a pout tugging at his features.

“You didn’t tell people?” Mark turns to you.

“I was told not to,” you shrug. “Privacy, and all.”

“Really? Cause Mark was more than happy to literally shout it out at practice when you told him.” Johnny blinks, a teasing grin pulling at his features.

“Which now makes sense why Chenle practically bulldozed me fifteen minutes ago.” You nod, turning your amused gaze towards the male standing beside you.

“You told Mark, but not us?” Mingi pouts, crossing his arms over his chest.

“To be fair, I’ve been chatting with Mark a lot longer than I’ve personally known all of you guys.” You say, a casual shrug to your shoulder. “Not my fault Hongjoong didn’t tell you.”

“Wait, but how come Hongjoong knew?” San’s brow furrows, turning to look at the aforementioned male.

“He’s not the only idol that should have been informed.” A slight frown tugs at your brow. “Speaking of, Riley, when’s the briefing meeting supposed to be?”

The woman, who had been silently standing to the side all this time observing the interactions straightens in her spot. “You’re set to meet with the idols you’ve requested to join you for your presentation just before we break for lunch. The rehearsal for your speech won’t be until the very end, though.”

“Requested?” Yeosang’s brow furrows.

“I’ve seen a few of them around, but I’ve yet to speak to the majority of them.” You comment.

“I’m still mad that you didn’t ask me to do it.” Mark crosses his arms over his chest. “Some friend you’re suppose to be.”

“I’m sorry!” You raise your hands in your defence, a hint of exasperation to your voice. “The organizers told me I could only ask so many people on such short notice. I only thought of the idea less than two weeks ago. I’m lucky to get even eight of them to agree!”

“As long as you haven’t forgotten about our bet.” He huffs, quirking an eyebrow at you.

“I most certainly have not forgotten about our bet.” You meet his gaze, eyes wide in exasperation. “You’re about to owe me ten meals, Mister. Anything that I want, too.”

“I sure hope you don’t mean him cooking for you.” Johnny snorts.

“Oh, god no.” You huff out a laugh. “Not after I saw the ‘egg incident’ of Resonance era.”

“Not the egg incident!” Johnny cackles right along with you, and you notice Taeyong grimacing as he remembers it as well.

Mark’s eyes are wide, a tight smile on his face showing just how exasperated he is. He almost looks as if he wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

“Bet?” This time, it’s Hongjoong that quirks a brow.

“Oh, you haven’t been told? She bet him that she could learn-“

Johnny gets cut off by Mark’s nervous laugh.

“Mark Lee, you told me that you didn’t tell anyone about our bet.” Slowly, you turn your head to look at him, a tense smile on your face.

“Oh, the ‘Seventh Sense’ bet?” Taeyong tilts his head slightly in inquiry. “The whole of our group knows of it. We all want to watch you, what’s the phrase? Wipe the floor with him.”

“Mark Lee!” Your jaw drops. “I told you how I feel about dancing in front of other people! Especially when they’re idols! Not to mention the original performers of the song!”

“I’m sorry! You still said you’d do it!” He replies, lifting his hands in front of himself in his own defence. “I just got too excited!”

“More like carried away,” Johnny chuckles.

Casually, Yunho leans into Johnny’s side. “What’s this bet they have going on?”

“Oh, they were talking about some of her favourite NCT dances one time, and she commented on how one of them was, ‘The Seventh Sense’.” Johnny explains. “She admitted to always wanting to learn it just to say she knew it, but never actually got that far, yet. Mark decided it would be a good idea to discourage her from learning it since it is pretty difficult, and she doesn’t usually dance like we do. Hence, a bet was made that she would prove him wrong.”

“Listen,” you sigh. “I may not be a dancer, but don’t tell me what I can or can’t do. I will prove you wrong. I just wasn’t expecting to have a crowd when doing it. I don’t really like dancing in front of other people all that much anymore.”

“Why not?” Yeosang’s brow furrows, a slight downturn to his lips.

You curl your arms over yourself, holding your elbows delicately in you hands. A small grimace crosses your features as you seemingly curl in on yourself. “Personal reasons.”

A hushed understanding settles over all of them. That is, until Mark is breaking it.

“Is this about Kite?”

“Don’t-“

“Isn’t Kite your significant other?” It’s Riley that asks, and you notice all eyes on you.

“My ex, yes.” You sigh.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize you weren’t together anymore.” She’s quick to bow to you, but you wave her off.

“It’s alright,” your expression falls, a grimace crossing your features. Out of the corner of your eyes, you see Yeosang take a half step towards you. Only, you don’t chalk it up to much, as so do Mark, Jongho, and Yunho. “I just don’t like talking about him anymore.”

“Sorry for bringing him up,” Mark pats you comfortingly on your arm. “Anyways, Ten says he has to watch you dance for the bet.”

“Not Ten!” The instant mortification is clear on our features. “Anybody but Ten.”

“And Doyoung, and Jaehyun.” Taeyong nods.

“It could be worse. It could be worse.” You begin to mumble to yourself, blinking at the ground a few times.

“Well, if you want to owe me ten meals, you can always back out.” Mark comments casually, a hum to his tone.

“No way in hell.” Your eyes narrow. “I have to prove you wrong.”

“Now, this I can’t wait to see.” Johnny chuckles, eyes crinkling as he smiles.

Just then, a voice from across the way draws your attention.

“Holy shit, is that who I think it is?” 

Looking across the backstage area reveals Vernon from Seventeen staring at you with wide eyes. Though, you notice that you’re not the only one who’s now staring at him in response.

Quickly, he bows, apologizing lowly before making his way across the backstage area. You note Mingyu, Seungcheol, Seokmin, and Jihoon all following behind him silently.

The crowd around you slowly begins to get bigger, and you notice some other idols lingering around the edges of the room, waiting to catch a glimpse of you. A fact of which that has a heat rising to your cheeks, shuffling once more in your spot.

Vernon stops on the edge of the circle you’re now apart of, smiling at you politely.

“I didn’t know you’d be here!” He inclines his head towards you in greeting, introducing himself and his group mates in succession. “It’s so nice to meet you. We’re all pretty big fans of your work.”

“Thank you so much,” you bow back to him politely. “It still boggles my mind knowing the idol groups I enjoy listening to know who I am. Not to mention read my writing.”

“You’re a fan?” Seungcheol blinks at you in shock.

“You can speak Korean?” Seokmin is equally as shocked, though there’s a hint of pleasantness to his tone.

“Yes, to both.” You chuckle, noticing how Jihoon shoots you a polite nod in acknowledgement. You smile back, leaning into Mark in the next second, “looks like Jihoon knows how to keep a secret.”

“Hey!” He whines, and you notice how most of the males around you look at the aforementioned one in confusion.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” he smiles.

“You as well,” you return the look. “Thank you for agreeing to be a part of my presentation on such short notice.”

“Wait, is that why you nearly collapsed at practice during break about two weeks ago after looking at your phone?” Mingyu’s brow furrows, turning to look at the shorter male beside him. The height difference in person nearly makes you chuckle.

The way the shorter male elbows the taller one in the side is all the answer you need.

“That’s nothing,” another voice draws your attention from the side. “You should have seen the panic Hyunjin went into when we got the call.”

Wordlessly, the members of Stray Kids now begin to crowd around you, and you notice a few giddy smiles sent your way. Though, what makes you laugh is seeing Hyunjin’s exasperated look that he sends towards Bang Chan after the words escape the elder’s mouth. The way you see some of the members greeting Ateez excitedly has your heart warming in your chest. To be able to see all of the friendly interactions between the different groups makes you extremely happy for the moment.

“Holy shit, you weren’t kidding when you said she was tall.” A voice from your left draws your attention, and you notice Changbin staring at you with an awe filled expression while standing beside Wooyoung.

“I told you.” Wooyoung replies, a smug grin tugging at his features.

“Speaking of height, Jaehyun and Jungwoo owe me twenty bucks.” Johnny hums, walking off back towards the green rooms with Taeyong in tow.

You turn to Mark, a questioning look on your features.

“They didn’t actually think you’d be taller than me.” Mark grumbles, averting his gaze.

“I take it you didn’t, either.” You chuckle, noticing how a few males shift closer in order to see just how tall you are compared to them.

“To be quite honest, I didn’t,” he chuckles, and at the way you quirk a brow, he’s quick to continue, “not that it’s a bad thing! I think you being tall is really cool!”

“Thank you!” You grin. “I do, too!”

“By the way, since Chan is too much of a scaredy cat to ask,”the deep voice of Felix draws your attention to the side, “would you mind taking some pictures with us later? We think the fans would love it.”

“First of all, your voice should come with a warning.” You notice him grin at your words, and you return the smile, eyes crinkling at the sides. “And sure! I’d love to.”

“Us, too!” Vernon is quick to jump in.

“Listen, if anyone is getting a photo first, it’s me!” Mark voices loudly.

Out of the corner of your eyes, you notice quite a few female idols looking your way. Some of them look on at you in awe, while others cannot hide their distaste seeing you surrounded by so many males. Even some other male idols begin whispering about your appearance quite openly, but you ignore them for now.

“Yeah, yeah,” you huff out a laugh, “and I’m pretty sure you mentioned how Yangyang wants to do karaoke at some point?”

“He just wants you to perform WAP with him.” Mark sigs, shaking his head disapprovingly.

Your eyes widen in amusement, a subtle heat rising once more to your cheeks. “Does he?”

“Oh, karaoke sounds fun!” Vernon nods enthusiastically.

You jaw parts in mild shock, pure mirth dancing in your gaze. “Did the Vernon of Seventeen just invite himself along to karaoke with me?”

Lowly, you register Hongjoong and Chan whispering to their groups in Korean.

“I’m coming, too!” Jongho nearly shouts, drawing almost all of the attention of everyone backstage.

“Right, you still need to serenade her,” Yunho nods, and instantly he’s running for his life as Jongho chases him with murderous intent around the backstage area.

You turn to Mingi, “you still up for shouting anime openings at the top of our lungs at some point?”

At this, the remaining members of Ateez turn to look at Mingi.

“Of course!” He grins widely, nodding enthusiastically.

“Sweet.” You mirror his grin, noticing a few other idols commenting on wanting to join in on the fun.

“No, I’m telling you Shotaro, she can speak Japanese.” A voice coming from off to your right says.

“Just because she asked you what one word is, doesn’t mean she can speak it.” Another voice replies, getting closer with each passing second.

“She immediately jumped right back into conversation with Riley about animals afterwards.” Yuta rounds the corner, Shotaro right beside him.

At the way both males see the group you’re currently surrounded by, they immediately freeze in their spots. Briefly, each male nods their head in acknowledgement, eyes flashing in recognition as they see Mark standing a little ways away from them.

“Mark, tell Shotaro that your author friend can speak Japanese.” Yuta meets the male’s gaze, stepping in closer with Shotaro in tow.

“Hi, Mark’s author friend here.” You lean forward slightly, waving a bit so you catch their attention. “I can speak Japanese.”

The way Shotaro stubs his toe on the table against the side wall in shock nearly has you laughing in response.

“See! I told you!” Yuta crosses his arms, turning to glare pointedly at Shotaro.

“You can speak Japanese?” Another voice from in front of you catches your attention, and you see Momo, Mina, and Sana from Twice making their way over towards you.

“That’s incredible!” Mina comments, her eyes wide as they join your little circle of idols.

“Thank you!” You smile widely at the three of them.

“By the way, these guys aren’t bugging you, are they?” Sana shoots you a knowing look. “You seem a little crowded.”

“No, no, not at all.” You shake your head. “I appreciate you checking in on me, though. That’s very kind of you.”

“We’re all really big fans of your work.” Mina adds, a light blush dusting her cheeks. “We overheard Riley saying how you gave her boyfriend confidence through your writing, and you’ve done that with a few of our members, too.”

“You’re really beautiful in person.” Momo compliments, a soft smile painting her features.

The way your hand comes up to cover your mouth is so natural, a vibrant heat rising to your cheeks.

“Thank you so much,” you cannot keep the awe from your voice. “I think you’re all very beautiful, too. Not to mention talented. I always have fun singing and dancing along with your songs, especially when I need a pick me up.”

All three of their eyes light up, excitement coursing through their veins as they grip each other giddily.

“You like our music?” Mina cannot keep the joy off of her features.

“Of course I do! I listen to a lot of the groups currently around me.” You admit. “I find a lot of inspiration from them.”

“Who’s your favourite?” Shotaro cuts in, noticing how both he and Yuta casually lean against the side table now.

You smile at him knowingly, a gleam to your eyes. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

The way he blinks back at you has you laughing lightly. Though, before you can say much more, the familiar music that begins to play from the stage area has you freezing in your spot.

“Mark Lee,” you turn to him with wide eyes, “how dare you not tell me.”

In the blink of an eye, you’re rushing towards the seating area to get a better view of the stage, quite a few of the idols blinking at you in shock. Riley seems to catch on quickly, following behind you as a few of the other idols do as well.

Pushing through the door, you step out onto the floor before the stage. You completely bypass the steps leading to the seats in favour of walking out onto the empty standing area where you can see some staff milling around. Some other idols seem to be watching the soundcheck, too. 

Out of the corner of your eyes, you notice another familiar idol shoot a friendly smile your way before she turns her head back to watch the four males on stage.

A small squeal of excitement escapes your lips as you watch SHINee do their soundcheck on stage. Each male even gets a portion during their set to perform a part of one of their solos, and you vaguely hear a staff member commenting on how there will be a SHINee special this year. Which explains why they’re getting the longest stage time out of all of the groups set to perform.

The moment SHINee finishes their soundcheck, you find yourself leaning back against the little guardrail leading up into the stands. You can feel your heart racing in your chest, and you blink, finally coming back to the reality around you.

“Surprise?” Mark chuckles from beside you.

“‘Surprise’ my ass!” You smack him lightly on the side of his arm. “You want to complain about being friends for so long, and you can’t even tell me my favourite group is performing at the award’s show I’m attending!”

A few chuckles are heard from around you from passing staff, as well as a few of the idols who followed you out.

“So, I guess it’s true that SHINee is your ult group, huh?” Vernon comments, a small quirk to his brow.

“Oh, most definitely.”You nod. “At least, one half of them.”

“Who’s the other half?” Felix asks, his eyes wide and hopeful.

“Oh, that’s easy,” you notice quite a few of them hanging on to your every word, “VIXX.”

“Damn, two tough groups to beat.”Vernon whistles lowly.

“By the way, you keep mentioning this performance you’re going to be having, but who did you all ask to be in it?” It’s Seonghwa who asks, looking between you and some of the idols around you.

“Well, it was short notice, so my publisher only managed to contact a few groups that we knew were going to be here,” you reply, a slight quirk to your lips upwards. “And a few that we did not, just in case.”

“I think you asked me first before our manager did,” Hongjoong laughs, arms crossed casually over his chest.

“Since my performance is going to be on the different forms of art, I wanted to showcase different idols who matched different art forms.” You explain, noticing how you draw in a few more people’s attention with every word. “I wasn’t expecting so many to agree to help.”

“Okay, so we know Joong is one. Jihoon, and Hyunjin are two others,” Mingi comments. “Who are the rest?”

“Well, I asked all of SHINee to be in it, and a few EXO members, but I never heard back from SM. Same with Seulgi of Red Velvet. The only confirmation I got that Ten, Renjun, and Taeyong all agreed to help, was from Mark, cause he wouldn’t stop complaining that I didn’t ask him to join. Twice’s Momo and Dahyun both agreed. Bang Chan, too.” You say, listing all of the idols off on your fingers. “I tried to have at least two per category, but it didn’t always work out that way. Plus, multiple could definitely fit in more than one.”

“Categories?” Yeosang asks, blinking at you curiously.

“Dancer, vocalist, rapper, fashion, visual art, composer, actor,” you list off. “Art takes many forms, and I wanted to emphasize that with their help.”

“We were told our respective categories when we got the call,” Hyunjin voices from above you, casually leaning over the railing of the stands and watching everyone with sharp eyes. “I don’t know about you guys, but I was asked if my art could be included in a video slide show thing to go along with it.”

“Oh, mine was, too!” A feminine voice cuts in from off to the side.

Turning your head, you see Seulgi join your little circle of idols. You smile at her, noticing how she nods her head politely at you just as she did during SHINee’s soundcheck.

“It’s so lovely to meet you, I’m a big fan of your books!” She leans in to grasp your hands lightly in her own, giving them a gentle squeeze. “As are Joy and Yeri, but they’re backstage for the moment. They’re going to be so jealous I’m meeting you right now.”

“I didn’t know you were going to be joining the presentation.” An awed look crosses your features, and you can feel your hands trembling slightly in her hold. She squeezes them once more. “Thank you so much for agreeing, I’m a huge fan of yours, too.”

“Then, I’m glad we could meet like this.” She replies. “I overheard that SHINee is set to join us for the briefing soon, too. Same with some of the EXO members.”

“Really?” You cannot prevent the way your eyes shine with excitement.

“So, then, who’s in which category?” Yeosang’s voice cuts through the crowd, his arms crossed over his chest. Though he leans against the side of the stands casually, he looks a bit tense.

Just as you go to answer, a call for you and your presentation team goes out for everyone to gather in front of the stage for the designated meeting. Lunch is called for everyone else, for now.

“Good luck,” Mark pats you on the side of the arm before heading out with some of the other idols in tow.

“Thanks, Mark.” At the intonation you use, you notice Vernon’s shoulders shaking in laughter this time as he walks backstage with some of the others.

Heading over to the stage area, you situate yourself right by where you see the stage director and event organizer appear. Seulgi, Chan, Hongjoong, Hyunjin, and Jihoon all follow you over, standing around you as the other idols that have agreed to help you gather.

A few minutes later, and you are surrounded by all of them. You notice that the artists practically group themselves by company.

“We’ll let you lead.” The stage manager says.

“Whenever you’re ready.” Says the event organizer.

Across from you stands Jihoon, Hongjoong, Ten, Taeyong, Renjun, Bang Chan, Hyunjin, Seulgi, Baekhyun, Kyungsoo, Minho, Key, Onew, Taemin, Momo, and Dahyun. They all arrange themselves in about three lines facing you.

“Thank you.” You nod once to them before turning to face all of the idols before you. Quickly, you introduce yourself, a sense of professionalism taking over quite quickly. “I understand that this was asked of all of you on short notice, and I would like to take the time now to thank each and every one of you for agreeing to aid me in my presentation. That being said, I was uninformed that some of you would actually be joining me for my speech until a short while ago, so I will have to adjust a few things.”

Nods of understanding are seen from most of them.

“You all should have been asked a few questions when you received the offer, confirming that it is okay for my video editor to either use clips from your music shows, dramas, behind the scenes footage, livestreams, songs, events, and, or, any type of artwork you have created.” You scan the small group of idols before you. “I want to confirm now that I have your express permission to do so. Otherwise, my editor and I will adjust the video clips to be shown along with the presentation.”

Nods greet you all around, a few in mild shock that you would ask them such a thing again.

“Good.” You smile. “Now, I believe you should have all received a copy of my speech, and instructions along with it as to which categories I would like you to be sorted under. Again, if you have any issues, let me know and I will adjust accordingly.”

At the silence that greets you, a few of them sending reassuring smiles your way, you feel a tension beginning to release from your shoulders.

“I understand that these categories might not be what you usually get sorted under. That being said, I want to focus on different aspects of art using familiar faces to the public that were already attending these ceremonies.” You explain. “The lines I would like a few of you to read are meant to showcase art as collaboration, as expression, and as our passions. Again, if you have any issues, let me know, and I can rearrange some things.”

The way they all wait for you to continue warms your heart.

“I want to thank all of you for helping to bring my vision to life.” You smile. “If you have any questions or concerns, please, do not hesitate to let me know.”

“Are we allowed to see the video before it’s finalized?” Dahyun asks, her eyes wide as she blinks excitedly at you.

“Of course!” You return her smile. “The finalized version will be edited and submitted tonight, along with the script. You’ll all receive a copy of that as well. There’s simply one more thing I need to confirm before then.”

“What is it you still need to confirm?” Kyungsoo asks you, meeting your gaze.

“Well, making sure I had all of your consent to use your own forms of art was one of them.” You say. “The other, I would like to speak with all four members of SHINee about. Privately, if that’s alright?”

All four members turn their attention to you, both Minho and Onew smiling kindly as they nod their heads. You notice Taemin blink a few times, caught off guard by the sudden request, while Key’s expression remains neutral.

“If you’ll all follow me for a moment.” You step off to the side a little ways away from everybody, even the stage manager and event organizer.

Luckily, all four members follow you quickly, and you notice the other idols beginning to chat amongst themselves to give you some more privacy.

Once you’re far enough away, you’re turning to all four of them. Nervously, your hand begins to fiddle with the strap of your purse still slung over your shoulder.

“There is an additional piece I would like to add to the end of my speech, but I wanted to discuss it with all of you first.” You begin, swallowing somewhat thickly. “As you may or may not know, I have always been a big fan of your group as a whole, and have found inspiration from all of you. The reason I am pulling you all aside to ask you this, is because I respect all of you, and I would never want to do something to offend you, or disgrace his memory.”

You notice Key’s one eyebrow twitch upwards slightly.

“I would like to end my speech both making reference to, and quoting Jonghyun and his artistic views. If you would like to read what I have penned for it, I have copies ready for you if you believe that will help influence your decision. If even one of you disagrees, or is uncomfortable with such a thing, I will not do so, and leave my speech the way it is now.” You tell them, feeling your heart about to beat right out of your chest as you take the time to meet each of their gazes. “I only felt it right to ask permission from you before doing so, as again, I do not wish to tarnish or disrespect any of you, or his name.”

A beat of silence passes over all of you as they consider your words. What makes it even more nerve wracking is how you cannot read any of their expressions.

The four of them briefly share a look before Jinki is turning towards you.

“May we see what you have written?” His voice is soft as he meets your gaze once more.

“Of course.” You nod, quickly opening your purse and pulling out a few slips of folded paper.

Gently, you soften the creases, separating the two sheets with the same ending portion of your speech on them. A moment later, and you hand one piece to Key while Minho takes the other.

The silence that stretches on around you as Taemin leans into Minho’s side to read, and Jinki into Key’s, is deafening. Sweat begins to form on your hands, which continue to nervously fiddle with the strap of your purse. You even go so far as to start rocking on your feet to dispel your energy, your eyes darting every which way as they read your writing over for themselves.

You notice a single tear begin to trail down the side of Minho’s cheek.

The four males share a brief look with one another before Jinki looks up in your direction. You notice that he blinks away tears of his own.

“We appreciate the consideration you have extended to both us and him,” he begins, voice catching in his throat. “Thank you for asking before wanting to honour his memory like this.”

You blink at him, breath catching in your throat as his words wash over you. Perhaps you heard him wrong, but is he saying what you think he’s saying?

Again, they all share a look, Minho straightening himself while wiping at his cheek.

“Please keep this as the ending to your speech.” He says. “It makes a great addition to what you already have.”

The familiar burn of happy tears begins to make itself apparent behind your eyes.

“I know we don’t know each other, but the fact that you went out of your way to ask us permission before doing this shows just what kind of person you are.” Key adds, a gentle smile being sent your way. “Thank you for considering our feelings on this matter.”

“I think we are all in agreement that we would like you to use this ending to your speech.” Taemin confirms, a soft nod to his head.

“Really?” You cannot hide the way your eyes shine, heart swelling in your chest.

At the four nods you receive from all of them, a large smile breaks out onto your face.

“Thank you so much.” You bow deeply to all of them, eyes fluttering shut as you do so.

“Thank you for asking.” Jinki smiles kindly at you once more.

“Of course,” you right yourself. “It was only the natural thing to do.”

“We appreciate it.” Minho smiles your way as you all begin to make your way back over to where the other idols are.

Seeing you approach with SHINee in tow catches all of their attention, hushed whispers dying out to a silence once more.

“Alright, so the way I’ve grouped you all off means there should be at least two of you per category,” you address them all. “I know I’m probably repeating myself here, but I want to focus on how we all have different outlets for our art. You’ve all been told the category you’ll be under, so if you can all just stand with your ‘buddies’ for the moment it would help me explain the next part.”

Again, nods greet you in understanding.

“Great!” Your eyes crinkle as you smile. “If I could get the composers over here.”

You point to your immediate left, seeing Bang Chan, and Jihoon both move to their new spot.

“Visual artists here,” you point beside the first group, a little ways to their right.

Hyunjin, Renjun, and Seulgi all stand together.

“Men of fashion, next.”

Both Hongjoong and Baekhyun stand side by side.

“Dancers, if you please.”

Ten, Taemin, and Momo form a small group.

“Then, the actors beside them.”

Kyungsoo and Minho stand together, nodding politely at each other in acknowledgment.

“The rappers.”

Both Taeyong and Dahyun move to the side, smiling at each other politely.

“And finally, the vocalists.”

Lastly, Key and Onew shuffle off to your right, completing the semi-circle around you.

“I will represent the author aspect to my speech, but I think that one is pretty self explanatory.” You chuckle, nothing how a few of them smile along with you. “Now, each of you were given a specific line to go along with your category. You may decide amongst yourselves who says it, or if you all wish to speak it in unison. However, for effect, it would be best if we all came to a decision on whether the lines will be spoken in unison by the groups, or individually. I really want to emphasize the collaboration between all of us artists with these lines.”

You notice each of the groups briefly talking amongst themselves before a few are nodding. A minute later, and you have all of their attention on you.

“Unison, or individual?” You quirk a brow.

“Individual might work best.” You see Baekhyun nod in your direction as he responds, the rest muttering their agreements.

“Great!” You smile, shifting to pull a small spiral bound notebook and a pen out of your purse. “Let me just write down who you’ve all agreed to speak each line between you all for reference. It also makes the technicians jobs a bit easier.”

A few minutes later, and you’ve written down the respective idols that will be saying each designated line.

“While each of you are speaking your lines, the category you represent will appear on the screen behind us along with visual aids showcasing you performing, demonstrating, or working on said topic.” You explain, and you see some of their eyes light up in awe. “There will be a strong emphasis on timing, especially on my part. A lot of what I say will be synced to the video behind me, as well as serve as audio cues for both you and the lighting techs.”

“You’ve put a lot of thought into this.” Key observes, clearly impressed.

“Well, I went to an arts high school, and I was also a theatre kid.” You cap your pen, smiling widely. “I do also have a flare for dramatics at times.”

“What type of arts high school?” Chan asks, tilting his head mildly in curiosity.

“It had quite a few different disciplines, but I was in for vocals.” You tell them.

“Not drama?” Minho’s eyebrows quirk, clearly surprised.

“No, but that would have been my second choice.” You close your notebook.

“Wait, you sing?” Momo’s lips part, an eager gleam to her eyes.

“I was trained operatically for over seven years.” Your words have clear shock pulling at all of their faces. “Don’t know how good I am now, it’s been quite a while since I last had a lesson.”

“I can’t wait to tell Jongho, he’s going to lose his shit.” Hongjoong mumbles.

“Wait until Seungmin hears this,” Hyunjin huffs out a laugh.

“Would you ever sing for us, sometime?” Seulgi asks, her whole face lighting up as she looks at you eagerly.

Your eyes nearly bulge right out of your head, heartbeat thundering in your ears.

“Uh,” you blink, attempting to wrap your head around the situation fully. One of your favourite female Korean singers has essentially just asked you to sing for her sometime.

“She’s already agreed to karaoke with some of us,” Hongjoong hums, a chuckle falling from his lips.

“Oh, I want to come, too!” Dahyun chimes in, smile wide as she meets your gaze.

“Is there a karaoke space big enough for everyone?” You put your notebook back into your purse, motioning to all of them that you’re done for now. “That’s all for now, by the way. Thank you again for agreeing to help on such short notice. We’ll practice the timing during the actual rehearsal portion designated for us at the end of the day.”

You notice the members of EXO and SHINee all nod their heads, heading off for lunch with one another after bowing to you politely in leave. You bow back, smiling faintly as they head off.

“I’m sure we can find one,” Jihoon says as the rest of you begin to head backstage as well.

“Damn, I’m gonna get to hear you sing and dance today?” Ten grins, stepping right up beside you for the moment. “I must be extra lucky.”

“What do you mean ‘dance’?” Seulgi tilts her head curiously.

“Oh, the ‘Seventh Sense’ bet she has with Mark.” Taeyong mentions casually.

“Oh!” Seulgi’s eyes widen, nodding in understanding. “That!”

“Does everybody at SM know of that bet?” You exhale an exaggerated puff of air.

“Only the people Mark told,” Renjun chimes in. “So, naturally, everybody knows. Man has a loud mouth at times.”

“At times?” Taeyong laughs.

“Do you know any other dances?” Momo asks, Dahyun nodding along with her as they walk side by side. “You mentioned that you enjoy singing and dancing to our songs earlier.”

“I know a few, but I usually don’t like dancing around other people.” You reply.

“How much is ‘a few’?” Ten quirks a grin, eyes tinkling mischievously.

“I have a few mixes my one friend made for me that I’ve learned.” You shrug. “Kind of like my own personalized random dance plays.”

“That’s pretty cool!” Dahyun comments, quite enthusiastically.

“Wait, how come you don’t like dancing around other people?” Renjun’s brow furrows, turning to look at you briefly.

By now, you’ve all made it backstage once more, and you notice many of the staff and other idols have dispersed for lunch. Only a few familiar faces linger around the space from earlier.

Again, it’s like you shrink into yourself. “Personal reasons.”

“Then, how are you going to win the bet you have with Mark?” Ten tilts his head curiously at you.

Out of the corner of your eye, you notice a few more Twice members, such as Jihyo, Jeongyeon, Mina, and Sana all join your group. Even some more NCT members are present, and you see Mark come to stand right beside you for the moment.

“You see, my need to prove him wrong is much stronger than anything else.” You reply, noticing how you see Yeosang watching you from the corner that the rest of the Ateez members are currently lingering around.

“Name the time and place.” He grins, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Well, who knows when we’ll get another chance to do this,” you say, quirking a brow knowingly. “It’s going to have to be today, is it not?”

“Now would be an opportune time since the stage area is clear of most people,” Taeyong suggests. “Riley can help with the soundboard and play the song through the speakers. Everyone would probably think it’s just us getting in another round of practice again. Sometimes we do that before shows.”

“I’ll go get Doyoung and Jaehyun!” Ten rushes off before a word of protest can escape you.

“Would dancing with someone else make you feel better?” Momo offers.

You think about it for a moment before nodding. “Perhaps it might.”

“Oh my goodness, come dance with us, then!” Sana grabs your wrist, pulling you back out towards the stage area with some of the others in tow. “Now, where’s Riley?”

You notice the aforementioned female appear from down the hallway.

“Riley, soundboard for us for a bit!” Mina begins pushing the somewhat stunned female along with all of you and back to the stage.

“What?” Riley blinks. “Oh, okay!”

“I would love to dance with you!” Jihyo grins, walking alongside you as Sana continues to pull you along. “The other girls are eating lunch, but I hope us six will do!”

“You’re more than enough.” Comes your instant reply, a firm nod of your head. “Though, I warn you, I’m probably going to be the ‘standing guy’ emoji when the music starts.”

Jeongyeon lets out a boisterous laugh from your opposite side. “It’s okay, we’ve got you!”

“I’m about to dance with pretty girls,” you mumble, causing all of the girls around you to smile. “Someone pinch me, I must be dreaming.”

Instead, you receive teasing pokes to your upper back from Dahyun who currently stands behind you.

“What song would you like to start with?” Momo asks, the members all flanking you on stage as Riley sets up the soundboard from the middle of the floor.

“Uh…” your brain refuses to function for a moment as you process her words.

“Wait, you said you had some mixes your friend made you.” Dahyun recalls. “This might be presumptuous of me, but do you have any Twice mixes?”

You blink. “I do, actually.”

“Great! Why don’t we do that, and we’ll support you!” Sana grins, shaking your arm gently in excitement.

“You all really want to dance with me?” You ask, voice meek as your eyes shine with your emotions for the moment.

“Of course!” Jeongyeon’s reply is immediate. “Not only would we be getting a chance to dance with our favourite author, but we’ve got to show those guys how it’s done.”

The wink she sends your way makes your heart leap for joy in your chest. You cannot help the way a bashful smile pulls at your lips as you pull out your phone.

“If you want, we could even do our best to follow another of your mixes.” Mina offers. “It would be like a random dance play for us. Plus, I’m sure more people would join! It’s whatever makes you most comfortable.”

“We can start with the Twice mix, and go from there?” Even though you sound a bit unsure of yourself, you notice the girls all eagerly nodding around you.

Already, a small crowd of both idols and staff members begin to form around the stage. Some stand in the wings, while others look up from the ground around the stage. There’s a good mix of eager looks and curious ones, but the smiling faces of the six girls around you manage to distract you from the less than savoury ones right now.

“Alright,” you say, walking to the edge of the stage with your phone in hand. Crouching down, you hand it to Mark. “Mark Lee, I will personally shave your head, and dye all of your white shirts bright red if you fuck around with my phone. I will also never gift you spoilers to my books, or watermelon taffy again.”

The wide-eyed nod he gives you says it all, and with the added way he swallows thickly, you giggle lightly.

“It’s mix three,”  you say, handing him your phone.

Again, all you receive is a nod from him in response before he’s walking over to Riley and passing her your phone. A moment later, and she hooks it up to the soundboard, looking up at you in preparation to hit play. After doing a few light stretches with the girls, you straighten your back, cracking your neck all the while.

“The first song is ‘Fancy’, which leads into ‘Talk That Talk, and then ‘I Can’t Stop Me’ after that.” You tell them, seeing them all nod excitedly at you.

“Do you usually dance a specific part, or is it all just chorus stuff?” Momo asks, standing beside you to your right.

“When I learn a full song, I usually learn either my bias, my wrecker, or whoever ends up being easiest to follow. For the mixes, it’s mainly just chorus stuff, though.” The way you see them all nod along at your words has your heart warming in your chest. “There’s a small intro, and then the pre-chorus to ‘Fancy’, though, so you have time to get into position.”

“We’ll follow your lead!” Jihyo grins, a firm nod to her head.

“Whenever you’re ready,” Sana smiles at you.

Meeting gazes with Riley across the way, you smile, shooting her a small thumbs up. Immediately, the music starts blasting through the speakers, and you can feel the adrenaline beginning to pump through your veins.

“You know, if you would have told me I’d be dancing on a stage with Twice today, I would have never believed you.” You comment, a light chuckle to your voice as you get into position.

“Well, believe it, girly!” Mina laughs, lightly going over the pre-chorus part of the dance as you all get into position. “Cause guess what?”

The only thing you have time to do is blink at her in response as all six of them shout out a loud ‘We’ as the chorus hits.

A large smile breaks out onto your face, whole body heating as you begin to dance along with the six girls around you. Lowly, you all sing along to the lyrics, losing yourself to the music as it surrounds you. The way their eyes light up as they watch you dance along with them sets your heart racing even more so than usual, absolutely revelling in this euphoric feeling.

Cheers erupt from some of the staff and other idols standing around the area, and you can hear Mark exclaim a loud ‘holy shit’ from beside the soundboard.

“Damn girl!” Dahyun bumps hips with you playfully as the song switches. “You can really dance!”

“Really?” Your eyes shine as you meet her gaze, noticing the other five members encouraging you all the while. At the nods you receive, you smile bashfully, tears threatening to gather in the corners of your eyes. “Thank you.”

From the crowd, you hear Ten beginning to shout in Mark’s direction. “Damn, Mark, you didn’t tell us your author friend could dance!”

At the way Mark shakes his head, blinking in shock, you can just tell he calls back an ‘I didn’t know’ lowly in response.

“You are so going to lose that bet.” Doyoung laughs loud enough for both you and Mark to hear.

“Hey, Chan, do you think she knows any Stray Kids dances?” Changbin calls over to their leader as a few more of the members join the crowd.

“Back off, Bin! She’s dancing to Ateez, next!” Wooyoung shouts at his friend, and you notice Jongho standing there with his mouth hanging open beside him.

The moment you hit the drop with your leg extended in ‘I Can’t Stop Me’, more cheers erupt from the crowd, even more staff and idols coming to see what all the commotion is about. The way you can see some people’s jaws drop in awe makes you grin, getting more and more into the moves the more time passes. It makes it even better when Johnny and Ten start hooting and hollering encouraging things your way as you dance. Even Wooyoung and Changbin get in on the action, Felix cheering along with them.

The moment the mix ends, the six girls are crowding you, talking excitedly about how much fun that was, and that you should all do that again some time.

“Thank you so much for dancing with me,” you meet each of their gazes, noticing how they all look at you fondly.

“It was our pleasure,” Jihyo smiles widely at you, squeezing your arm gently.

“If there’s ever any dances you want to learn, let us know!” Dahyun grins, giggling all the while.

“Yeah! We’d be more than happy to teach you.” Momo nods enthusiastically.

“You kept up with us really well,” Sana adds. “Most trainees can’t even do that.”

“I may not be a dancer, but I do put a lot of effort in to everything I do.” You avert your gaze to the floor bashfully, tapping the tip of you foot lightly against the floor of the stage.

“It shows.” Mina reaches over to squeeze your arm this time, smiling kindly at you.

Slowly, a chant begins to build from the surrounding crowd.

“Seventh Sense. Seventh Sense. Seventh Sense.”

“I think you’re being asked for an encore.” Jeongyeon winks at you, and you chuckle along with her.

“After you’re done proving him wrong, we should do one of your mixes!” Dahyun eagerly says, excitement shining in her eyes. “I wanna see how many songs we can get.”

“Plus, like I said earlier, more people might join that way!” Mina repeats, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

“We’ll give you space now.” Jihyo says, beginning to usher the other girls away from you. “As long as you’re ready.”

“I’m ready.” You nod once firmly in confirmation.

“Good luck!” Momo cheers, shooting you an encouraging thumbs up as they make their way to the side of the stage.

Stepping towards the front of the stage, you get into position. Lifting your head, you make eye contact with Mark who still stands beside Riley, looking completely stunned for the moment.

“Be prepared to lose the bet, Markie Boy.”You grin, flicking your gaze towards Riley for the moment. “Hit it.”

An awed hush settles over the crowd as you wait for the music to start. Not even a moment later, the opening beats of “The Seventh Sense” can be heard through the speakers. 

Your body instantly begins to move, the dance having been ingrained into you with how often you practiced it since making this bet with Mark. Even your expression moulds to fit the theme of the song, and as soon at the lyrics begin, the crowd erupts into cheers.

You hit every beat, noticing how both Doyoung and Jaehyun wear expressions of complete and utter shock on their faces. Even Mark cannot keep his mouth from falling open as he watches you incredulously.

About halfway through the routine, you notice Taeyong hoist himself up onto the stage, joining in to dance with you for the remainder of the song. The way you sing along softly to the lyrics only becomes apparent when he gets closer, his eyes widening ever so slightly as his lips part in awe.

During Mark’s iconic line, you purposely look his way, shouting it at the top of your lungs with a wink sent in his direction. You notice he still wears that same expression of shock on his features, and even you can tell how red his face has gotten from your position on the stage.

The way you can keep up with Taeyong has even more cheers erupting from the crowd. Ten practically begins shaking Doyoung beside him, screaming about how you’re dancing his part right now, a giddy smile on his features. Hell, even half of Stray Kids and Ateez look about ready to fall over, their wide eyed stares encouraging you to continue.

The moment the song comes to an end, a roar erupts from the staff and idols around you. You hear some shouts from certain groups asking you to dance their songs next, and it makes you smile. Your chest heaves with every breath you take, and you turn to face Taeyong just as he turns to face you.

“You proved him wrong.” He smiles, extending his hand out to you for a high five. “You’re an incredible dancer.”

A large smile stretches across your features as you meet his hand halfway in the air. “Thank you so much!”

“Really, do you know any more dances?” His eyes are wide as he looks at you, an eager gleam shining within.

“From start to finish?” You tilt your head slightly.

“Yeah, or just in general.” He nods.

“Well, from start to finish, I know Red Velvet’s Psycho and Bad Boy, EXO’s Monster, BTS’ Fire, and GOT7’s If You Do.” You list off. “There’s a few more I know larger portions of, but the rest I just know from the mixes. I, uh, do also know a few duet dances, cause I used to dance them with my ex.”

Out of the corner of your eyes, you notice both Hyunjin and Wooyoung chatting with Riley, of whom looks a bit reluctant to be apart of the conversation.

“I owe you ten meals.”Mark comments, stepping up onto the stage. “You really did prove me wrong.”

“I told you I would!” You stick your tongue out at him playfully, wiping at the sweat forming at your brow.

“You’ve also really drawn a crowd.” He wiggles his eyebrows. “I don’t think anybody was expecting you to be able to dance like that.”

Out of the corner of your eyes, you see Jaehyun approaching you.

“You can really dance.” He comments, blinking at you a few times as his dimple appears.

“Thank you.”You incline your head in his direction, a warmth blooming on your cheeks.

“You mentioned knowing duet dances?” Taeyong inquires. “Which ones do you know?”

Your eyes widen slightly, noticing Wooyoung, Hyunjin, and Changbin now all making their way onto the stage towards you.

“Uh…” you chuckle nervously. “Well, I do know Baby Don’t Stop, Seulrene’s Monster, and, uh…” your voice drops into a mumble, “Troublemaker.”

“You know Troublemaker?” Changbin’s voice is full of awe. “Okay, we’re dancing that.”

“Get your own dance partner, Bin, I’m dancing Troublemaker with her first!” Wooyoung crosses his arms over his chest, huffing all the while.

“Oh, you all think I know Hyuna’s part, don’t you?” You glance at him with amusement dancing in your eyes.

Taeyong’s brow furrows. “You don’t?”

“Oh, I know some of it, but the only Hyuna dance I really know is Lip and Hip. I learned Hyunseung’s part.” You chuckle. “My best friend learned her part.”

“You dance often, then.” Hyunjin observes, calculating gaze fixed on you for the moment.

“I mean, I used to.” You shrug. “I’ve always enjoyed it, even though I’m not a dancer. It used to be my ex’s and my thing.”

“Is that why you don’t like performing in front of other people?” Changbin’s brow furrows.

“Kind of,” you mutter. “But that’s not a can of worms to get into today.”

“Okay, well, we need to plan a day where we have a dance party, clearly.” Wooyoung comments, slinging his arm around your waist as he pushes Mark out of the way.

“Dance another mix for us!” You hear Mina call out from the side where you see all of the other Twice members now standing.

At the way you hesitate, the crowd starts chanting for you to dance more.

“We tried convincing Riley to play another one anyways,” Hyunjin shrugs casually. “She wouldn’t budge unless you were comfortable with it.”

You chew on the skin of your bottom lip. “Well, I guess one more wouldn’t hurt.”

Wooyoung shakes you lightly in excitement as he laughs giddily. “Yay!”

“If you join, and I see any of you mocking girl groups, I will punt you off of this stage.” You threaten, pointing your finger threateningly at the males around you.

At the way they raise their hands mildly in their own defence, you know you have them.

“Alright, hang on,” you say, quickly hopping down the stairs at the side of the stage to make your way towards the soundboard where Riley is.

Along the way, some staff members and idols send compliments your way. A few of them are backhanded, but you brush those off for now. Besides, you feel as if nothing could bring you down.

Reaching Riley, you’re quick to unlock your phone for her once more.

“We’re gonna do another mix, but I figured my phone had shut off by now.” You chuckle, and you see her nod enthusiastically. “When I give the signal, play mix four.”

“Roger that!” She mock salutes you, and you giggle along with her.

Making your way back to the stage, you notice quite a few more idols having gathered around. Some eagerly talk amongst themselves, while more have moved to the front of the stage in order to get a better view of the dancing about to take place.

“Alright, you guys ready?” You quirk a brow as you stand back into position.

“Oh, hell yes!” Both Wooyoung and Changbin cheer.

“As a curtesy, the first song is The Eve.”You tell them. “This is my longest mix, so I might not do all of it.”

“Understandable.” Taeyong nods your way.

“Whatever makes you most comfortable.” You notice Momo has come back to join you, nodding all the while.

With a smile pulling at your lips, you send a nod Riley’s way. A moment later, and the familiar sound of music is playing through the speakers.

The more you dance, the more you notice that even some of the backup dancers join in on the fun. You cannot keep the joy from radiating off of you, a brilliant smile on your face as you move around the stage with the people around you. The way even Seulgi comes to join you for some of the Red Velvet songs that you have in the mix makes your heart swell, laughing along with the others gleefully.

The whole time, you can feel eyes on you. Whether they’re judgmental, or in awe, you no longer care, for you get lost in the way dancing like this makes you feel. You haven’t had this much fun in a while, and you’re not about to give it up now.

Once the mix has finished, another cheer rises up from the crowd. A few of the dancers even come up to you and start up a conversation about where you learned to move your body like that. A fact which makes you all the more bashful.

An intense feeling of eyes focussed on your back has you turning to face the crowd. Only, when you look in the direction you felt such a gaze coming from, all you see is Yeosang staring at you with an unreadable expression on his face. Mingi seems to be talking his ear off excitedly at the moment, the shorter male nodding along quite firmly to whatever is being said. However, you’re not even sure if he’s listening to what his group mate is saying, or not.

Smiling softly his way, you notice him blink suddenly, as if to clear his vision.

Mark catching your attention from beside you has you turning away from Yeosang for the moment. Only, you fail to see the way the male’s eyebrow twitches slightly, the corner of his lips tugging downwards.

A short while later, and you’ve cleared the stage area so rehearsals can continue as scheduled. Riley makes her way back over towards you with your phone in hand, passing it to you with awe still clear in her eyes.

“I didn’t know you could dance like that!” She exclaims, visibly shaking in her spot. “You’re incredible!”

You chuckle at her enthusiasm. “Thank you.”

Now, as you settle back into the backstage area, you notice quite a few more idols and staff around. The way their gazes dart over to you is obvious, whispers reaching your ears.

“Have you eaten, by the way?”It’s Mark that asks, handing you a fresh bottle of water as you lean against the wall.

“I ate a big breakfast before I came, so I’m not really hungry right now.”You reply. “But thanks for checking in.”

“He was just hoping to get a head start on those ten meals he owes you,” Johnny chuckles, joining your little circle.

You notice Hongjoong, Jongho, Yeosang, Wooyoung, and Changbin all join you as well.

“So, when are you coming over to learn more Stray Kids dances?” Changbin asks casually.

“Um, after she learns some Ateez dances, obviously.” Wooyoung answers for you, a roll to his eyes. A second later, and a smug grin is pulling at his features as he stands proud. “Her bias is gonna teach her everything he knows.”

“Wait, you’re her Ateez bias?” Changbin’s eyes nearly pop out of his head before turning to look at you. “Please tell me you have better taste in men than this idiot over here.”

“Hey!” Wooyoung whines.

“I never said Wooyoung was my Ateez bias,” you chuckle, and you notice how said male’s pout only deepens.

“Then, who is?” Hongjoong quirks a brow, a teasing smirk pulling at his lip.

Again, a knowing smile pulls at your features.

“You mean, you won’t tell them?” Mark frowns. “You had no probably telling me that Ten was your NCT bias.”

Johnny looks absolutely scandalized by Mark’s words, placing a hand over his heart as his jaw drops in shock. “And here I was thinking what we had was special.”

“I met you today, John.” You deadpan, blinking once.

Laughter erupts around you.

“Wait, Ten is your NCT bias?” Jongho looks at you, somewhat incredulously. “I would have thought it was Jaehyun with how often you reference him in your writing.”

You shrug casually. “Some things are the same, others are not. I mean, Ten’s not my only NCT bias.”

“You have more than one?” It’s Yeosang who asks this time, his brow quirked and gaze unreadable.

“Of course I have more than one, there’s over twenty-one members in counting, and multiple sub-units.” You reply, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “I’ve got a bias per unit.”

“Yet, none of them are me.” Mark pouts, crossing his arms over his chest.

“When I was first getting into NCT you were.” You remind him.

“It’s not the same.” He whines, shaking his head.

“So, you’ll tell him your biases when he asks, but not us?” Hongjoong quirks a brow, amusement dancing in his eyes. Though, at the way his jaw twitches, you can tell he’s slightly exasperated by this fact.

“Again, I’ve talked with him for much longer than I’ve personally known you.” You chuckle. “Plus, you’re not as persistent about it as some people.”

The way you shoot a playfully pointed look at Mark says it all.

“Oh, okay,” Wooyoung nods, a maniacal grin tugging at his features. “We’ve just got to annoy it out of you.”

“That’s one way to ensure I never tell you.” You huff out a laugh, a smirk dancing on your lips. “Though, I don’t know why you guys are so obsessed with knowing who my bias is. Really, you should be asking about my wreckers. Haven’t you ever heard the phrase that a person’s bias is most like them, but their wrecker is their ideal type?”

Without waiting for a response, you walk over to join Mina, Sana, Jihyo, and Jeongyeon, leaving all of the males stunned for the moment.

“Mark, who’s her NCT wrecker?” Johnny immediately turns to the aforementioned male, noticing the others do the same.

“I- uh…” he swallows thickly. “I don’t know.”

Your shoulders shake in laughter as you begin conversing with the girls. A few hours later, Joy from Red Velvet joins in on your little circle of friends, her introducing herself and expressing how big of a fan she is of your writing. Easily, she falls into conversation with all of you, and she even brings up the fact that she and the other members saw you dancing with Seulgi earlier.

Again, you feel eyes on your back, watching your every move closely. When you spare a quick glance over your shoulder, you see Yeosang watching you with a neutral expression on his face. His arms are crossed over his chest as he leans back against the wall, one leg propped up behind him so that his knee is bent slightly.

Unfortunately, you don’t have time to dwell on it for too long, for the girls are all asking to exchange contact information with you. Of course, you readily agree, the Twice members even going so far as to create a group chat with you and the few other members that danced with you earlier.

Loud whispering draws your attention to the right where you see Irene, Wendy, and Yeri all standing to the side. You send a polite smile their way, but the only one who somewhat smiles back is Yeri. On the other hand, both Irene and Wendy could not look more disinterested by you. In fact, you’d say they almost look annoyed that you looked their way.

The moment you see Seulgi hop over to them quite excitedly, overhearing your name being mentioned, scowls pull onto Wendy’s and Irene’s faces.

Pointedly, Wendy leans into Irene, whispering quite loudly as you turn back around.

“Can you believe they invited such filth to perform at these awards?” Wendy’s voice reaches your ears, and you cannot help the way your shoulders tense. “I hope they wash the stage after she’s been rolling around on it. I can’t believe we even have to breathe the same air as that thing.”

From the muffled laughter you can hear behind you, you know it’s not just Irene that finds these comments funny.

“Wendy, stop it, you’re being extremely rude.” Seulgi chastises, an immediate frown tugging at her features. “And I can’t believe you two would laugh along with her! She’s been nothing but kind to everyone this whole time.”

“Did you see her dancing earlier?” Irene snorts out a laugh. “You know we stopped doing charity events, right, Seulg?”

“You call that dancing?” Wendy cackles. “More like flailing. She looked like a fish out of water.” A pause. “Wait, let me describe it more accurately: a beached whale.”

Again, more laughter can be heard from around the room, the loudest emanating from that specific corner where they reside. Though, the sneers and smug looks from some of the idols and staff that you’ve felt judging you all throughout the day no longer can be ignored. You have a feeling that they’re all finally getting the vindication of hearing their negative thoughts and feelings towards you finally be said out loud.

Jeongyeon places a comforting hand onto your back, noticing how you visibly deflate at the harsh words being thrown your way. Jihyo, Mina, and Sana all look about ready to cut a bitch, and Joy just looks embarrassed, her eyes widening in shock.

“People like her make me sick.” Irene comments, somewhat casually.

“Watch. I’m gonna go over there and compliment her in English, and it’s going to make her day.” Wendy laughs, already moving to push herself off of the wall.

“Wendy,” Seulgi warns, grabbing the aforementioned female’s wrist and holding her in place. “You’re making a fool of yourself, disgracing our group, and embarrassing the rest of us. You know she can understand you, right?”

You hear Wendy scoff, “I doubt that.”

Tugging her wrist harshly out of Seulgi’s grip, Wendy continues to make her way over to you. The ominous presence you can sense that is her approaching makes you tense, your hands nervously wringing themselves together.

Just then, a squeal is heard from behind you.

“Oh my gosh! Aren’t you that really famous author? I love your work!” Wendy’s voice reaches your ears, causing you to turn around to face her.

The expression she wears is one of awe, but it doesn’t take an expert to know that it’s not genuine. You can see how her gaze not so subtly trails over your body, a brief look of disgust pulling at her features as her lips twitch downwards. Though, in the blink of an eye, that expression of ire disappears, replaced by that overtly friendly one she attempts to wear.

You don’t even have to say anything, for Mina, Sana, Jihyo, and Jeongyeon all step in front of you, shooting harsh looks her way. Even Joy shakes her head disapprovingly, crossing her arms over her chest at her group mate.

Wendy looks clearly taken aback, blinking a few times at the silence that stretches on around you.

“What’s that look for?”She chuckles, somewhat nervously. “I just wanted to come over and say that I saw you dancing earlier and it looked like so much fun!” She nearly chokes on her own words, blinking as if she cannot believe what she’s about to say. “You’re a really good dance-“

“Are you sure it wasn’t more like a fish out of water?” You meet her gaze, a blank look in your eyes as you tilt your head slightly to the side.

You can just tell that your words catch her completely off guard.

“What are you talking about? I only came over here to tell you how pretty I think you are.” Wendy blinks at you in shock.

“Do you expect me to thank you for insulting me not even two minutes ago?” You continue. “The only thing I hate more than dishonest people, is someone who thinks they can get away with being two-faced just because of who they are.”

“How dare you!” Wendy inhales sharply, anger pulling at her brow. “You bitch-“

“Did you eat a stone, Wendy?” Jihyo’s gaze is nothing short of furious as she stares the elder down.

“You should be ashamed of yourself.” Jeongyeon spits, brow furrowed in distaste. “You of all people, judging another person based solely on their looks.”

“Why are you defending her? Can she not speak for herself?” Wendy replies, incredulously. “And Joy, why are you wasting you time with filth like her?”

“Unlike you, I don’t judge a book by its cover.” Joy deadpans, blinking at the girl before her blankly.

“Are you that unhappy with you life that you have to bring down mine?” You ask her, tilting your head slightly to the side.

Wendy rolls her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. “Stop acting all high and mighty. You’re nothing, anyways.”

“I’m not the one that went out of their way to insult the other.” You reply, holding your elbows in your hands once more as your arms cross over your body for support.

You can see her getting more angry with every lack of reaction you give her.

“Yeah, well, you’re writing is mediocre, and you’re just a fat, ugly pig.” She spits, and it goes so silent that you can hear a pin drop around you. “No wonder your ex cheated on a bitch like you.”

Gasps are heard all around.

You wish you could prevent the way you inhale sharply from her words, but you do. What makes it worse is the way she grins after hearing you do so.

Out of the corner of your eyes, you see Mark needing to be held back by Johnny.

You blink, swallowing thickly and doing your best to maintain your composure. The familiar sting of tears burns behind your eyes, but you refuse to give her the satisfaction of seeing you break.

Taking a deep breath, you school your expression.

“Wow, Wendy, not many people know that fact. I only ever talked about it once or twice during my lives.” You comment. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say that you’re obsessed with me.”

A loud scoff leaves her lips as she turns away from you, rolling her eyes all the while.

“Whatever,” she mumbles, beginning to walk away. “You’re not worth my time.”

Your eyes widen significantly, appalled by her comment for the moment considering she was the one that approached you. Luckily, though, you don’t have time to dwell on it, for the girls surrounding you are immediately turning back to face you, asking if you’re okay.

“Yeah, yeah,” you shoot them all a tight smile that doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “I’m fine.”

“I am so sorry about her,” Joy looks the most distressed, her cheeks red in embarrassment. Instantly, she bows to you. “I know it’s no excuse, but I hope you will accept my apology for her instead.”

“It’s not your fault, Joy,” you say, stepping out of the circle of girls for the moment.

“Where are you going?” Mina asks lightly, concern clear on her features.

“I just need some fresh air. I promise I’ll be right back.” Again, another tense smile is sent their way that doesn’t quite meet your eyes.

Not even giving them time to respond, you’re quickly making your way back down the hallway that you first arrived in. Pushing open the side door, you make sure you can get back inside first before letting it fall shut. Luckily for you, no one stops you, nor bothers you for the time being. Doing a quick scan of the area, you ensure that you’re alone.

It takes a moment for you to be sliding down the side of the wall. Another for the movement to become synonymous with the first of your tears escaping your eyes.

You don’t care that Wendy insulted your writing. You recognize and understand that it’s not for everyone, nor is everyone going to like it. If people telling you they didn’t like your writing, or that you were a shitty writer stopped you from pursuing your passion, you wouldn’t be where you are today. Hell, you don’t even care that she insulted you. You’ve had people insult your appearance your entire life, so that’s nothing new.

No, what hurts you the most is the fact that she would use such a traumatic incident against you. How she even knew about it confuses you, for you only ever disclosed the information publicly once, and not even all of the details. The memories are still just too painful for you, even if they happened over six months ago.

You crouch against the wall for a good few minutes, your muffled sobs being your only accompaniment. That is, until you hear the side door creak open.

Quickly, you’re wiping away your tears and standing back to your feet. You figure it’s probably some staff members either needing some air themselves, or going for a smoke break. 

You’d rather not have anyone see you cry right now.

What you don’t expect, however, is to see Yeosang peeking out at you from the small opening. He says nothing as he meets your gaze, and you don’t know whether to thank him for that, or not. What he does offer you, though, is a tissue, wordlessly extending a small packet out to you with the top already open.

Silently, you take one from him, nodding your thanks. The smile you send him is small, and tense, but it’s something.

“Riley said that your rehearsal for your speech is on deck.” He says lowly. “I came to get you.”

“Oh, okay,” you swallow your remaining emotions for the moment. “I’ll be there in a minute.”

A nod is all you receive in response as you dab at your eyes while turning away from him for the moment. Scrunching your nose, you sniffle.

“Are you okay?” His tone is soft, and you notice how concerned his eyes look as you turn back to face him.

“I’ll be fine,” you nod assuringly at him, but he doesn’t look all that reassured. So, you divert the topic as you head back inside. “You said it’s time for my rehearsal?”

“Riley’s gathering the other idols with Joong as we speak.” Yeosang replies casually, clutching that little package of tissues in his hands still.

“I see.” You hum, bringing the back of your hand up to rub at the side of your cheek.

Wordlessly, he offers you another tissue.

“Thanks.” You say, grabbing another from him.

He nods, which is the only response from him that you get.

“Hey, do you mind watching my purse while I rehearse?” You spare a glance at him just as you breach the backstage area, ignoring the few other worried looks sent your way by familiar faces.

“Not Mark?” He quirks a brow, the corner of his lips twitching upwards faintly.

“I don’t trust him not to go snooping through my bag to search for spoilers to my next book.” You chuckle lowly. “Besides, I know Jongho won’t be able to convince you to let him sneak a peek, either.”

Yeosang cracks a small grin. “You’d be correct.”

“I may not have the best judge of character, but I can tell that you’re a decent guy, Yeosang.” You say, and you watch a faint blush begin to creep onto his cheeks. “Thank you for not prying.”

Sliding the strap of your purse off of your shoulder, you hand it to him. Not even a moment later, he grabs it from you, slinging the strap over his own.

“It’s not my place.” He replies, blinking lightly up at you.

A call of your name from the stage manager draws your attention to the front.

“Good luck.” He nods, to which you nod back, leaving him without another word.

Yeosang smiles faintly, still feeling the warmth that continues to dissipate from his cheeks as he looks down at his feet. Shifting the strap against his shoulder, he slides the pack of tissues into the side of your purse, just in case.

Stepping into the wings of the stage, he watches on as you practice your speech for tomorrow, going over the stage directions and lighting cues with the staff. What he truly cannot understand though, is why, when every time he looks at you, he can feel his heart now racing inside of his chest.

#yandere ateez #yandere yeosang #yeosang scenarios #ateez scenario #ateez imagines #yandere kpop #yandere au #kpop au #kpop scenario #ateez x reader #ateez x y/n #ateez x you

[vapolis]

i was holding back on the echo love since they're not a romance option but i am Pleasantly surprised by the recent ask saying u were disturbed by the lack of it and BOY OH BOY DO I HAVE IT like in the first real meeting of them... im gnawing on my knuckles.... idk why but them hating on merc is just so 😁😁 and then the SUIT? im on my knees (jk) ((or am i)) also quick hold on before i forget MERC IS SO SILLY like literally just sauntering into v&v's apartment like they own the place after slamming one of them into the wall and saying oops, then proceeding to BACKHAND THEM AND SAY LOOKS LIKE MY HAND SLIPPED... TWICE???? im gagged aneee wayyysss echo just being in merc's apartment and then the silly little banter?? Im On the Floor AND THEN "JUST TRYING TO KEEP THIS RELATIONSHIP ALIVE, SWEETHEART"???????????????? Ok Ok I cant Ok Kill me then Ok Ok Im Dead Ok Youve killed me

and ofc im helping them with the other job cause ??? anything for u bbg (gn) Literally Anything. Like Orla's dog?? NoNoNo ECHO'S DOG (i say as if im not going for the jax&orla route.. 😨)

okay bye ♥

echo rlly is their number 1 hater even tho they're their best costumer 😭 like there's respect but they also looooove dunking on them.

also you're so real for the suit part.. the mental image was giving sm.. AND then getting called sweetheart yeah yeah echo knows what they're doing.

also our minds lmao I was just thinking about that double V part like they're such a fucking shithead and I'm obsessed!! Imagine someone does that!!! and slaps u twice!!! I'd blow up the entire flat w them in there rip to Viktor and Vega 💀

nah fr echo is the real package rn I can't even blame u for wanting to propose lmaooo watch them get turned down, tho 😔 sorry to say, but echo has higher standards. fireworks and a heart of rose petals are the least they expect

#asks #c: mc #c: echo

[theloveinc]

Hey ♥️ so I think you know what I look like (??) but I’ll dm a selfie incase lmfaooo but I’m pretty laid back, not much bothers me, and I have big weird energy. Goofy as shit when I’m happy or with people I love. I like activities out- like going to zoos or the aquarium. Walking my dog. But doing nothing is perfect too, because crafts are my shit- I do a ton of DIY, and other home projects and am going to build the best tree house for future babes, I’m not picky cause I want both boy/girls if you choose to add them. But physical touch, and acts of service are my top love languages, forehead kisses are top tier and nothing is changing my mind. I’m indecisive though so you can tell me who I fit best with (but I was thinking Aizawa or kiri) 🥹

But nonetheless I’ll love whatever you decide ♥️

I WANNA GIVE U BOTH AN AIZAWA BABBY AND KIRI BABBY SO BADLY but I'd be here for 400 years if i tried, so i think i'm just gonna go with..... aizawa!!!

(i thought u might even request endeavor, which i would've had fun with! i read a fic about that once, where....... actually, i'll get to the point now LOL)

create-a-kids: closed!

-

Let's see........ an AiSi baby... probably acts like Aizawa on the outside, but is a lot more like you deep down. Does that make sense? Like, when strangers meet your kid they definitely think they're an Aizawa clone... but you, him, and everyone who knows you both know that that kid is way more you than they are him.

Which means, on the outside, they're pretty nonchalant and deadpan... but on the inside, when you get to know them, they're really bright, creative and active. A bit on the quieter side at first (only cuz they're a little shy) but still friendly... then telling the strangest, funniest jokes if you catch them at the right time.

They're cuddly too, always trying to lay on you guys and sleep in your bed. They'll often fall asleep in the weirdest positions if it means some part of them gets to be touching you (total thing of like... you look down to find they're BENT asleep on the floor, but they aren't disturbed so long as their big toe is on your calf LOL).

I also think... they're really smart, and enjoy learning a ton, too. Kind of a Keen sandals kid, if you catch my drift... always wanting to play outside and bring in bugs and leaves to show you, or read nature magazines and take notes (and yes, they watch every single documentary about cats you can find). Even help you out with DIY, or at least just sit next to you and watch so they can learn how... handing you whatever tools you need before asking to try. It's a little worrisome cuz you don't want them to get hurt, but they're actually super good at it (and cute, in their painting smock + oversized shorts).

What's funny about them, though, is that they probably turn into Aizawa whenever they're upset. No matter how much they act like you when they're happy... they can turn into him in seconds, and it's super jarring for people who aren't expecting it. Probably only happens when something really bad occurs, like injustice (to which they're angry and immediately ignoring the offender), an accident (in serious mode), or even just... being annoyed (and trying to leave😐🫥)... but you cannot deny those grumpy genes LOL.

(Sucks when they're older and trying to argue with you about something... then it turns into Aizawa vs. Aizawa right there in your kitchen adjskfadjks and both of them are MAD af lmaooo.)

As for looks... UGH OFC I GOTTA SAY AIZAWA REPLICA with lighter hair, little dimples and a nice smile. The kind of baby that people (mostly those who only kinda know Aizawa) stare at wondering why they look so familiar, but not quite, you know? It becomes obvious at naptime, though, just whose kid this is.

However, I'm torn between girl and boy (when am I not tbh?)... but I wanna say..................... girl? Boy??? I really did see both throughout this whole thing, so whichever, honestly!🥰

#mwah hope this was okay! #i was thinking abt u the other day and ur kitties #i hope ur all doing good<333 #wouldve done kiri baby but honestly. ur just popping out a mini kiri tbh #which is unfair bc they *are* like u too but people don't notice LMAO #they're like 'omg they mustve got all their interest in these activities from kiri' #UH NO ???? but they don't know that sadly askjdfadsbjfasd #anyway its late so i go but kiss to u i love u #definitelysleepdeprived #dsd!! #caitie answers #caitie matchups #kids tw

[lqfiles]

Helloooo I have a little life update for you

I was so sick today like pounding headache and everything felt like throwing up. I had to excuse myself from class and work outside bcs this one bitch won’t SHUT THE FUCK UP and caused the headache.

I was out in the hallway working and I sneezed and it like shook the whole building 💀💀

Anyway the dude from last time who was taking forever to reply to me (still going weird) but he saw I didn’t look good and came over to comfort me 😻😻😻 he wants me so bad

Let me lean on him and everything 🕺🕺

- 🦖

😭😭 what a funny paragraph to start your update with omg i hope you’re okay and feeling better!! take medicine if needed!! i can only imagine the torment you went through ughh i hate loud people who disturb lesson like why can i not even hear my HEAD voice?? i hope she quits being a bother omg 😭 YOURE SO DRAMATIC THO LMAOOO i bet it was just a little sneeze 😑 /j but i hope you didn’t go school today them if it was rlly bad, PUT YOUR HEALTH FIRST!

HE WANTS YOU BAAAADD omggg but he got the energy to come up and check but not to respond quick to a text?? he wants you to chase him soooo bad omg THESE MEN NEED TO BEHAVE THEMSELVES 🤧 but eeeekkk this is working out for you i’m predicting you two to go on a date before the end of next month 🫶🏽😁

#asks. #from 🦖 anon #also anon have you sent me an ask before that was you giving your opinion on this song or not cos someone tried to frame you #like a week ago

[ashes-writing]

from the fanfic writers ask meme 😅 ✍🎶🍆👀🤲 plz?

<- fanfiction writers ask meme - accepting

Thank you thank you thank you! I was hoping to get asked some q's from this, this made my night? Thank you, sweet anon!

😅 What’s a story or scene you’ve created that you’re a smidge embarrassed exists?

Honestly, there's a lot of my first writings (unshared) that I absolutely refuse to look at because it just makes me cringe soooo hard and I'm glad I never shared it? As of recent, it'd be my fic for Xavier Plympton because I wrote myself into a hole with it... in the first got damn chapter. Like how dumb am I? I might revamp it later, idk just yet.

✍ Do you have a beta reader?

Not really. Like.. I'll show friends what I'm working on now and then but as far as editing -or not editing more oft than not, this is all on me. However, if the friend I've shown a work to suggests grammar fixes, etc, I will definitely listen to their suggestions + change things. But most of the time, no. I edit my own work? Or attempt editing my own work, idk. So technically, i do not have a 'beta reader', ig?

🎶Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

Always, omg. I have to have music to focus, I can't focus if it's too quiet? Lately, it's been my filth writing playlist on Spotify -it's private because I feel like if I shared it y'all would seriously have doubts about my sanity or think it sucks, lmaooo. And the song most often played on it is either Do Not Disturb by Halestorm, Take me to Church by Hozier or Desire by Meg Myers.

🍆Do you write the spicy stuffs? If so, what’s your most popular nsfw fic?

I do! I'm not like the best at it or anything, but... My most popular NSFW fic thus far has been this one right here, ironically.

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

As of right now, my brain is consumed with Kinktober plots and plans? I do have some ideas I'd like to write out eventually, maybe even make small fics out of them?

🤲Would you please share a snippet of a wip?

This is from the day one entry I've written (dirty talk / 69 ) with Steve Harrington...

“Shh.. You’re the one who thinks I can’t talk dirty.” Steve’s tongue drags slow across the outline of his kissable lips. Your gaze hones in on this and you’re mesmerized. Dazed. Imagining for the millionth time since you met him what it might be like to kiss him.

“It’s your fault I’m so hard right now. Do you feel what you’re doing t’ me, baby?” he shifts around and the movement causes you to rub right against him. The whine comes out before you can stop it. You’re dripping right now. If he had one tenth of a clue what his teasing was doing to you right now.

But he doesn’t.

Because he’s just kidding, he has to be. He’s just being an ass and proving your assumption -that he can’t talk dirty, wrong.

Oh, is he ever.

#<- ashes does get to know me memes #.... so this was fun! #absolutely send more if you like. #i got two more asks -> i will be sending my two loves response asks <3

[steppedoffaflight]

the amount of eating disorder blogs that interact with this account is kinda whack

#like i never had this problem on my other blog?? #it's very disturbing #i wish the people running these blogs realize the potential damage they could cause to others by interacting with the general tumblr public #i quite literally just had someone calling herself a fat bitch and her weight was in her bio and i weigh more than her lmaooo #but i do notice in general on this dash people feel very free to reblog ed things without any tags or warnings and that's... not okay #eating disorders are a mental illness (i say that as someone who had one) and reaching out for help is much more beneficial than engaging #with your body/food policing mentality and encouraging it with a blog meant to perpetuate it #tw ed related #aaaanyway

[jungkooqs]

im watching this really....interesting documentary

#its fucking wild lmaooo i shouldnt be laughing cause ita realltly disturbing and grotesque but the way he words himself imsfiwijff

[rvrindousvpet]

HII, I LOVE UR FANFICS AND BLOG SM(ITS SO PRETTY OGMGOGMG) YOU CAN LEAVE THIS HERE BUT HEAR ME OUT, bonten x tomie!reader (shes from the junji ito collection) where bonten is a bunch of down bad dogs for her and would do anything for her, the plot is up to you but if you're not comfy with writing it then its totally fine mwa!! <3

bonten with tomie!reader

characters : sano manjiro, akashi haruchiyo, hitto kakucho, kokonoi hajime, haitani ran, haitani rindou, akashi takeomi.

pairings : bonten x tomie! reader

warnings : swearings, graphic gore, death, mention of death, rape, attempted murder.

genre : fluff, angst?

note : hiiii hehe thankyou for you kind words anon! tbh I've never read junji ito, but i do know tomie. i actually can't handle horror shit- like idk i just can't handle it and it scares me like crazy, but just for this reqs, i prepared myself to read 2 volumes of tomie. hmm more than scared, i feel annoyed and bad for tomie cause she's surrounded by shitheads, so yeah I'm not really scared but more to angry. also I'm sorry if the reader doesn't really act like tomie, i tried my best to portray her and I'm sorry if did such a shitty job, well that's too much i hope you enjoy this! and I'm also sorry if y/n is too ooc, or not like tomie

- hmm let me be honest, we don't know why tf your presence is not affecting them, like if it others they would hate you like crazy or obsessed over. but not with bonten... it's like they're bunch of people who's immune to you and it felt so weird lmaooo

- how you met with bonten? well just another normal day for you.

- you're pinned down on the dark alleyway by man with his eyes glazed like crazy and uncontrollable man.

- "ahhh, I'm about to die again huh?"

- well that shithead start making his move, groping all over your body while threatening you

- just as you're about to accept your fate and let the disgusting man lick you

- suddenly a bang* sounded out, and the bullet hit that man shoulder

- suddenly he was thrown off you in seconds

- a man with black hair and big scar ran across his face was in front of you

- "miss, it's okay you can go and run away now, we'll take care of him"

- huh? why is he not affected???

- seeing you not responding that man decided to ehem carry into some car heading to idk where.

- "oh well hello there beautiful, what a pleasure to meet a beautiful woman like you, the name's ran, what's yours?"

- umm another man that's not affected??? what the actual fuck!

- fast forward

- basically uhm, they bought you to bonten hideout/place. and you're introduced to bonten executives, and now that you know them. ain't no way you're escaping from them.

- all of them r real down fucking bad for you. like sure at first they're memerised at how gorgeous you are, but after spending more time and observing you they've fallen for your behaviour and personalities.

- they love how confident, how you stand tall, how you have your own principal, how you never bow down to others, how you behave towards them and how indifferent you act to them

- basically bonten is a simp for your my queen.

- there's one time wherein you're on your way to supermarket to buy groceries, you bumper into man at the isolated walkway. the man become enchanted with you, he's obsessed with you and slowly that turned into hate filled with urges to get rid of you out from this world

- as the man corners you and about to kill you merciless, a baton was bashed into his head knocking him aside.

- looking up you saw the bonten trio, ran and rindou being infront of you and sanzu is on the side pushing his feet into the crazy man face

- "say how crazy you are to disturb bonten's property huh?" rin spited out feeling angered at how that shitty man almost hurt you

- "oioioi where the fuck you you're going bitch, you gonna sit here and take what i give you as your punishment for touching bonten girl" sanzu said while pointing his katana on the crazy neck that keeps on muttering how he needs to kill you.

- "ahhh, you're annoying me :)" ran said after bashing his baton into the man head once again to the point he's fainted.

- when all bonten executives ge to know what happened all of them were fumed in fear, mikey even instructed his man to put the crazy bitch into one of their torture room

- after a while of silence, kokonoi voiced out asking "say y/n why that man is so fixed on killing you as if he's posessed?"

- welp here we go telling them the truth.

- after explaining to them, how you attracting people attention that will either be obsession or hate and will develop to them hating more than anything wishing you to be gone from this world

- how if you're dead, you'll get regenerated from your own dead body, how you healed so fast and all of that stuff. and also you kinda? told them what shits you've experienced and been through.

- instead of them freaking out, throwing you away calling you monster. they actually felt sorry and hurt and angry for you, for all the things you've been through.

- takeomi said "y/n, even though you've been through that shit thousands times and be resurrected even if you're dead, it doesn't change the fact that it's hurting you. don't get used to giving your life away so easily please. You're worth more than anything"

- fuck. they just make you feel something.

- "y/n" mikey calls out to you "if there's any people that disturb you or want to kill you just inform any of us. we'll get rid of them for you. you can't be injured"

- "sweetheart, dyya remember those shit heads name lemme kill em and get rid of em for you kay?" sanzu let out while grinning maniacally

- "y/n, if anything remember that we're here for you. we love you for who you are and anything else didn't matter" kakucho said

- fuck. you've never feel so loved and complete. after all of this time, after those ressurected time, after countless of death, after countless of time being called monster left alone and hated. you've finally get to feel what is it like to be loved to feel happiness

- they managed to bring another side of you, the side that no one ever saw.

- they love you nonetheless, they also love your new side. how you would get all clingy and waiting for them. they love all of you.

- at the end of the day, they will never leave you. even after knowing the truth.

- for a few days you noticed that they've gotten a lil bit busy?

- uhmm lemme just say that bonten is doing their business over what they say, lemme quoted "now it's time for payback motherfuckers, you messed with our y/n you mess with bonten."

- they would do anything. anything for you.

- got a creep that obsessed with you? considered it done, that motherfucker will die in no time

- don't tolerate shit. like literally, if they ever caught someone talking shit bout you or take your picture. uh well yeah they'll be 6 foot under in no time.

- absolutely fucking wholesome, will you praise anytime, anywhere.

- watch them fight each other to over who should take care of you.

- refuses you to let you do anything on your own

- love taking care of you, will baby you at any chance they get

bonus : since you're not apart of bonten officially? you didn't really have a desk or office, but! mikey decided to do something for you, ehehehe he actually make a lil space for you inside his bigass office and all bonten executives will take any chance to get into mikey's office just to see you or talk with you ><

#tokyo revengers x reader #bonten headcanons #bonten mikey #bonten x reader #mikey x reader #tokyo rev x you #tokyo revengers #tokyorev x reader #tomie!y/n #bonten #sanzu x reader #takeomi x reader #kokonoi x reader #kakucho x reader #rindou x reader #ran x reader #sano manjiro #sanzu haruchiyo #kakucho hitto #kokonoi hajime #haitani rindou #haitani ran #akashi takeomi #bonten timeline #bonten sanzu #bonten executives #bonten takeomi #bonten kakucho #bonten ran

[heartshyuck]

 Ascension to the throne

Pairing: CrownedPrince!Jeno x servant!reader

Genre: angst, slow burn, smut, strangers to friends (kind of), political, mystery, king au.

Synopsis: With the death of his father, threats from nobility, rise of rebellion as his country faces famine; will King Lee Jeno be able to rule his country and investigate the death of his father?

Word count: 30.2k LMAOOO

Warnings: there’s smut! Though it is sectioned off with (***) asterisks and black headers so you can skip it if you are a minor/don’t like smut. If you’re a minor please don’t read it and proceed with caution! panic attacks, themes of grief, self harm, description of blood, mention of violence, bombing and shooting. Just everything under acts of terror, threats, manipulations, profanities and drinking.

a/n: apart of the the “King’s Crown” series! thank you to my love @byutafy for beta reading, making the beautiful header, being my mental stability, motivating me and starring in this monster fic, ilysm bby 😙

Death is inevitable. Even for the King, who is worshiped like a God. All is taken away from him once the crown slips from his head: his power, authority, riches and status all erased by the infinite slumber. All he leaves behind are the people he’s wronged, each one cursing him, causing him to turn in his grave. Jeno is sure his father will not be resting in peace as he watches his coffin lower into the ground. The grey skies ripped open by lightning, the clouds seem to be the only ones truly mourning the loss of the great dynasty as Jeno himself is unsure if the heavy drops that stream down his face are the rain or tears. Maybe they’re both. So he doesn’t ignore the painful ache in his chest, for he knows it’s not grief but anger. A red blur that keeps his mind captive, for a King could not die unless wanted dead. He watched his mother sob, wearing a black veil as she’s now married to death and the status of a widow replacing the once worn proudly, Queen. For who was she without her husband? She was her son’s mother, never holding an identity of her own. Anger seeps into his veins as her world was stolen from her.

The hundreds of black umbrellas soon dwindle down to one and now that it has quieted down, maybe he can still hear Jeno as he drops to his knees in front of his gravestone begging for him to come back. “I am not ready father,” his voice breaks as he gasps for the cold air to hit his lungs, yet no matter how much he tries his breaths won’t steady. He sits there by his father's grave, the cold embracing him and the rain accompanying him. The future King sobs.  

“Your Grace.” A soft voice stirs Jeno back from the dream but from the wetness of his pillow and his tear stained cheeks, he guesses it was more of a nightmare. His eyes are heavy and swollen and there’s a stinging behind his eyelids as he attempts to lift them and just as he’s close the harsh sunlight pours into the room, as the heavy curtains are pulled back, his eyes squeeze shut and a deep groan leaves his throat as he rolls on to his stomach, rubbing his eyes and slowly preparing them for the streams of golden that illuminate the room.

The same voice, now less considerate to Jeno’s still sleepy state, breaks the silence once again: “Your majesty, you must break fast with your mother. She awaits for your arrival on the southern terrace, ” he tells Jeno and yet again, another groan leaves him. He only nods as he falls, face flat against his pillows.

As the many busy servants hurriedly move around him, dressing him, he stands there staring out of the window; and as far as he can see, flowers bloom and the sun kisses every inch of land, but he knows beyond that the world is set ablaze with a raging fire. “My Prince.” That voice again and Jeno is growing sick of hearing it disturb his thoughts day in and out.

“Yes Mark?” He replies in a yawn as he walks down the many hallways of the grand castle, Mark jogging slightly behind him to keep up with his long strides.

“The itinerary for today,” Mark continues, “After breakfast, you will have to attend your first summit.” At those words, Jeno’s heart drops and he’s reminded of the painful ache he felt that day, the daunting fear of not being enough, not being ready. Mark can feel the stiffness in the air as he can just about see Jeno tense, his steps falter and lose steam as they slow down. “And then an audience with you has been requested by your cousin, Lady Na, your Graces” And those words cause Jeno to smile and the fear he felt for a second fades.

“Accept it.” And Mark simply nods, still jogging along his side.

Reaching the south terrace, Jeno sees his mother looking over the flower garden that, at this time of year, is in full bloom. Wisteria climbs the balcony, tulips dominate the South and to the North the roses rule; Jeno has always found this to be his favourite place. A place that offers solace and peace, a place that numbs the still bright burning red that swells in his chest. At the sound of his footsteps his mother looks up to greet her son with a smile, the same smile she had gifted him with. Crescent moons for eyes as her cheeks push up, a comfort to Jeno that he prays isn’t going anywhere for a long time.

“Sit my dear.” She extends her arm to the chair opposite from her and he complies. “Since when did my son become so important that even his own mother had to schedule to break fast together with him?” She questions as the servants bring out the food. The warm spring wind greets Jeno, the pollen kissing his nose as he turns to his mother returning the smile

“Duties of a crowned prince unfortunately seem to take the place of oxygen these days, but never of my mother, that much I can assure,” he says with a sweet voice, smiling her way, trying to his best to convince her and yet she still narrows her eyes and sends a scoff his way.

“Speaking of duties.” His voice is hesitant and she knows the topic is a sour one, yet she braves through continuing. “The summit.” And again Jeno groans at the reminder, his eyes rolling back. “Your attendance is vital and I expect it.” her voice stern, it’s an order but her eyes are understanding.

“Crowned Prince and yet even the thought of defying my mother’s word sends lightning down my spine,” he smiles, again trying to reassure her.

“Even as King you should fear your mother,” she scoffs as she raises her cup gracefully to her lips and Jeno lets out a laugh, glints of happiness bubbling up to the surface, the first specs of happiness in a while.

Happiness is a luxury, the only one the Crowned Prince and future king cannot indulge in. For his happiness does not have an allegiance with the crown, his happiness resides in the smaller moments in life, like when his arrow cuts through time and space itself to hit the bullseye or in a larger aspect much more grand than his significance, such as watching summer collapse into autumn. Inevitable, out of control yet beautiful. Finding solace in nature, people, scriptures and living itself, that is what happiness is to the Crowned Prince, the future King.

This does not give him any form of happiness, standing here in front of a large group of nobles who all bow to him and yet wish for death to greet him early. Jeno takes his seat on the throne, the same one his father had previously occupied, to his right his mother and to his left his advisor Qian Kun, a great man whose family lineage had spent their whole lives guiding the Lee Dynasty in their reign. Jeno trusted Kun as much as his father did, enough to consider his thoughts but not enough to be completely blind to his own because of them.

“You may seat yourselves.” Jeno’s voice echoes through the chamber as all are silent, eyes only focused on him. As they all seat themselves, Kun rises to the centre to navigate the conversation.

“Our first decree of importance, in the discussion of Prince Jeno’s coronation,” he announces to the room of nobles.

An old man, no taller than up to Jeno’s shoulders, rises from his seat and clears. his throat. “Your highness.” He turns to Jeno yet his eyes address his mother “It has been almost a moon cycle since our great country has been without a monarch yet we have a fine and fit heir to rule, I say we are to have Prince Jeno crowned before the new moon.” a rumble of voices burst out as all discuss their opinions. Yet one voice makes it’s way above all and it’s a familiar one, Jeno’s uncle, next in line for the throne speaks up.

“But yet our Prince is still so young, much to learn and not to forget he is still not in possession of a wife. I suggest these formalities are to be dealt with first.”

But then another voice cuts him off, refuting his argument. “So we are to remain without a monarch whilst poverty, famine and rebellion begin to cripple our nation. Marriage is something Prince Jeno can attend to later, as you yourself state he is young thus having plenty of suitors and time. If anything, the additional title of King will make it easier to marry and forge new allies.” An agreement rings through the court until quieted down by Kun.

“Silence!” He shouts as he knocks a gravel against the bench to gain the attention of the nobles “It is then settled. Judging by the flow of converse, our Crowned Prince Lee Jeno shall be made King on the last Sunday of April,” he announces and the words make Jeno’s heart stop, his blood freezing as the words sink in. King by the end of the moon phase, the thought alone was daunting. To think he would be in charge of a nation, of people’s well beings and lives at only one and 20 orbits of the sun.

“The second and final decree of discussion is the rebellions and uprising of small terrorist groups. Duke Na, please educate us on this matter before we proceed with discussion.” At Kun’s words, Na Jaemin, the General of the army and brother by law to Jeno, stands for all to hear his voice.

“The rebellions have been an issue our late King and I had dealt with. Many of you know of the unfortunate North,” he explains but it seems like everyone already knows what he’s talking about, everyone but Jeno. This is his first time hearing about these rebellions, his father never once mentioning it. During the years of preparing to be King, never truly once did he really know about the affairs of his country, learning how to rule and govern hypothetically and nervousness builds up as Jeno wonders if he truly is the divine right and ruler. “Poverty had alway plagued them and famine runs in their street, the north are barbaric and incomparable to the divine south yet now they seek for better leadership, demanding their King to fix their problems. Through terror they plan to bring our attention to them. Myself and every soldier is working to stabilise them and once Prince Jeno is King, we can work alongside his majesty.” Jaemin then bows his head towards Jeno as he sits down once again. No one dares defy his words, he’s well articulated and each word convinces not only Jeno but hundreds of earls’ dukes and lords, nothing further is needed to be said.

Kun only nods before turning to Jeno. “Any input, your majesty?” He asks, and even though Jaemin had fully convinced Jeno he has this under his control, he can’t help but pick up on the tone of superiority in his voice, that they all think they’re better than those who belong to the North. He knows they do, for this North-south divide is as old as time itself.  “We need to save the North, they are my people as much as you are, they deserve the same level of respect and care. I need to assure them I can provide a much more stable lifestyle for them, decreasing the unemployment rate, investing in the North, decreasing famine and poverty and increasing literacy rates. The rebellions should not just be dealt with by the army but with my role as king to provide for them, we will have to work through this.” Jeno’s voice does not waver, he sounds like a King, he feels like a King. Yet the feeling plummets down as he sees the weary faces, the shocked ones and the displeased ones, all showing what they dare not to express. Jeno’s gaze quivers and falls to his feet, he nods at Kun as a sign he has finished and Kun begins to dismiss the court.

Jeno rises as soon as the first few bodies are out the door, leaving from where he entered and there is Mark awaiting his arrival. Jeno doesn’t stop for a second, finally feeling the weight of that room off his shoulders and Mark trails after him, saying something but Jeno can’t hear him, his mind and senses hazed. Jeno rushes to find a place with fresh air, any place with fresh air and once he reaches one of the small balconies his body folds over, breathing heavily, his hands shake and and legs about to give out as he crouches down. It’s not until the warmth of a hand on his shoulder pulls Jeno out of the trance, he turns to look at who it is and it’s you.

“Your majesty.” Your eyes widen as they examine the glossiness of his own and worry washes over you. You’re stunned and so unsure of what to do, but you crouch down beside him and he falls into your side, stray tears falling down his cheeks as he leans into your warmth. You’re not sure how long you stay like this but no words are exchanged, his breathing calms and he makes no indications to move out of your hold until Mark runs out onto the balcony. His eyes turn to the doors at the sudden noise and he jumps up.

“My Grace,” he calls out softly as he crouches down, the same worry you wore a few minutes ago, he opens his mouth to speak but no words leave. Mark’s unsure what to say and his eyes turn to you for help, but you’re just as hopeless.

“Your Majesty,” you whisper after a few seconds of hesitation. “Are thou well now?” You ask and his head lifts off your shoulder, he nods slightly and relief is visible on Mark’s face as he lets out air through his nose. Mark reaches for Jeno’s hand, helping him up and once he’s steady on his own feet, Mark lets go of him. You still sat on the floor, the gravel and dust sticking to the palms of your hands as you pressed all your weight to support yourself and Jeno, he turns to you with eyes still glossy and soft and muttered a quiet, “thank you,” to which you only bow your head at him, smiling. It’s only when he and Mark leave that you get up off the floor, dusting the once white apron that sits upon your dress, completely dazed by his majesty the king.

“Certain you are well, my Prince?” Mark asks again from behind Jeno, the concern still evident in his voice. And to this Jeno only nods in response as he makes his way into one of the many drawing rooms in the castle. The grand white doors, with its intricate gold decor covering, stood hovering over Jeno; they always made him feel small and insignificant but instead of that being a feeling he dreaded, he found great comfort in it. It humbled him and reminded him he was nothing special just because of the blood that coursed through his veins, it calmed his nerves. The heavy doors are pulled back by two awaiting guards, with great struggle they pull to reveal the drawing room with equal magnificence to every room in this palace. The wall ivory with gold embroidery, tapestries, portraits of the many great monarchs that come before Jeno and inside awaits his cousin, Lady Na. She rises to her feet as soon as she sees him and bows into courtesy. “Your majesty, King Jeno, now known and forever more.” She smiles up at him and he scoffs, rolling his eyes and he pulls her into his arms, hugging her tightly.

“Stop with that, I have yet to be crowned King,” he whispers into her hair, finding solace in her warmth and embrace. She doesn’t pull away until he does, until he’s ready to let go; he grew up with her, equal in age, roaming and running around these castle halls, they caused mischief and she was a constant reminder to his youth, to the days where all was easy and he loved her for it.

“Mhm yes, but it is upon us soon,” she reminds him and he frowns, pulling back and she only laughs at his childish antics. Pinching his cheeks, she always did for he was her little brother after all.

“I do not wish to speak of the matter, in fact i do not wish to speak about me at all,” he huffs out as he sits down and Lady Na follows after. “How is Jaemin?” He asks.

“Your Grace, you are better off telling me,” she sighs “Did you not just encounter him? I haven’t seen him in perhaps a fortnight.” She rolls her eyes.

“Well that’s no good, I’ll demand he takes a break from his wretched military duties that keeps him so far away from his beloved wife.” He speaks in a pout and she only laughs, fully aware that he’s kidding. “Is he treating you well at least?” He asks seriously this time, no underlying laughter but genuine concern for he’d have his head off if he wasn’t.

“Like a queen, I assure you,” she places her hands over his which rests upon his knee.

“As he should. You are royalty and after all, he is below your status,” he scoffs. “He’s lucky to have you love him.”

“That he is,” she giggles. “However Jeno, are you feeling well? Your eyes are swollen,” she asks, concern evident in her voice and she reaches up to feel his forehead but he flinches back before taking her hand in his own.

“I’m perfectly fine, your concern is much appreciated.” And her brows arch, not at all convinced but she drops the subject, he’ll come to her when he’s ready.

An hour or maybe two passes, there is no concept of time as Jeno sits in his sister’s presence, talking about everything they have been up to in their months apart. She brings joy, serenity and solace with her, a comfort he hasn’t been able to feel for a while. Yet the bubble has to pop at one point, though Jeno wishes these moments in time could last forever, the heavy doors are pulled open again causing both their heads to turn and as always, it’s Mark who interrupts. But it is not just him who enters through the doors.

“General Na Jaemin,” Mark announces his entrance and then makes his way to leave.

“Your majesty,” he bows to Jeno before residing next to his wife, instantly she grabs his hand intertwining her finger with his, Jeno sees stars in her eyes for love engulfs her and he can’t help but smile.

“Jaemin, I’ve told you many times to only refer to me as Jeno, we are brothers after all.” And at that, Jaemin just nods his head, repeating Jeno as if he was testing the word out on his tongue. “What brings you here?” Jeno asks. “we were not expecting you.”

“I don’t mean to intrude,” Jaemin speaks with only respect for Jeno, despite just marrying into the family. There is slight tension from earlier as Jeno sees where his cousins beliefs lie and who he sides with earlier in the summit, they do not align with him. They do not align with his cousin’s yet he hopes it is only an act to appease ancient nobles with even ancient mind sets. Jeno hopes he is as good of a husband as he is a general, a leader.

“You do not intrude,” Jeno reassures him of his place amongst them, he reassures him of his place by his Crown Prince’s side. It almost sounds like a threat, that he has to stay, is to remain loyal for as long as he lives. If the Duchess notices the slight strain in Jeno’s voice she chooses to ignore it, only smiling but Jaemin is still yet to learn the art of masking one’s emotions. Both the Prince and Duchess had spent their whole youth learning to hide intentions, never allowing diplomats, nobles and in time even each other from seeing your true emotions and reactions. For never allowing them the luxuries to be able to know what you’re thinking, to be able to scheme. Never show weakness. Yet General Na has failed, unlike his wife who keeps composure, he can’t help but the rise of his eyebrow, the slight delay in the smile he offers. Possibly it was pride or honour, Jeno is not quite sure but Jaemin definitely does not see himself as lower than Jeno. He sees them as equals, Jeno can tell by his relaxed shoulders, the ease he finds to call him by his name.

Another lesson Jeno, crowned prince, was taught. To read people, be observant and to decipher every movement and expression. The general is easy to read, Jeno smirks as he sees the side of his lip twitch; threatening your general is never a good idea but putting him in his place and allowing him to remember who he serves is never a bad one. We wouldn’t want any ideas emerging in his mind before the coronation.

Jeno does not speak of work nor the coronation in the remaining moments he has in the General and his wife’s company. Instead, they continue to speak of childhood. Jeno has taken on the role of embarrassing his older sister as much as he can before her husband, stories and stories, he retells all that the walls of the castle have seen. His tales are of a time where both the lady and himself were all but barely five. He speaks of himself as a spoiled prince showered in mother’s love and protection. Speaks of Lady Na as a child who sat by the King, his father, in courts; always ambitious, for she said she declared in a voice that rang through the halls so clear and loud that she would make a better king than Jeno any day. She smiles at this, she laughs and yet she rolls her eyes, “I was five,” she defends her childish thoughts.

“Ah, but clearly you must have been correct,”  Jeno teases. “Father did allow you to sit by his side.” And Jaemin laughs at the image of a five year old sitting in court, not possibly understanding anything said within the chamber and again she rolls her eyes, nudging her elbow into Jaemin’s side, she narrows her eyes and he only laughs more. A smile so wide and it is one only meant for her, she softens at the sight of it immediately and Jeno decides maybe he is as good of a husband as he is a general. “Do plan on having any children soon,” he blurts out.

Both of their eyes snap up towards him, laughter seizing and smiles faulting, a sore spot Jeno thinks to himself. “Soon, maybe,” Jaemin answers truthfully and he holds onto his wife’s hands, squeezing it tightly, “Being a general is busier than one would think,” he laughs but it’s awkward and she smiles yet it’s awkward.

They leave soon after, Jeno shakes Jaemin’s hand, his grip firm as expected of the man that leads the nation’s army. He hugs his sister, he holds her close to him, almost as he wanted to melt into her. “I’ll see you soon,” she laughs, her voice strangled slightly as he squeezes her with his arms, swaying side to side. “The coronation is soon,” she reminds him as if he could possibly forget. He only then draws back, smiling, finally letting go; they say the last of their goodbyes.

You run as fast as legs could carry, past the maids that dusted the mantle pieces, polished the banisters, scrubbed at the floors. The servants that carried towers of silverware, the finest the kingdom had to offer and you made your way down to the kitchen where you have been called. "______!” He shouts and shouts, and you wince as you grow nearer.

“I’m here, Mark,” you announce your arrival and he turns on his heels to face you.

“Perfect.” His eyes light up at your fast response. “You are to take these up to the bus boys.” He points to a silver tray that carries a dozen golden flutes, all with careful and intricate detailing round their rims. “And then make your way to the Prince’s chambers to help ready him.” You bow your head before leaving, tray held steadily between both hands, your steps are now slow and steady for you would sacrifice your life if it meant these flutes would not drop.

“Jisung,” you called out, one of the many busboys waiting down in the ballroom making sure all tables were perfect for tonight. He turns to you with a bright smile. "Hey, ____.”

"Here, take these." You hand the tray over to him carefully. Jisung is a great friend of yours; he's sweet and kind and most definitely clumsy. You've known him since you were young, having grown up in the castle where your parents worked and now years later here you are working in their place. He's quick to take them off you and with a wave of your hand you bid him farewell before you're off again, rushing towards the Prince’s chambers.

You haven’t been in the Prince’s company since the day out on the balcony, and you haven't seen much of him either as you have been asked to help prepare in the kitchen for this upcoming day. The coronation. After a month of planning, running around and hectic itineraries that Mark laid out everyday leading up to today, just one more busy night and you can finally return to the normal pace of the castle. The dormant sunrises that will replace the endless, sleepless nights that just merge into daylight. You guess Mark had asked you to help the Prince get ready for this evening just in case another episode was to occur, if the Prince got too overwhelmed and forgot how to breath, maybe you could hold him tight to your chest once again, stroking his hair and whispering reassurance into his ear, just as you did that day.

Finally, you reach the large doors that lead to the Prince’s chambers. Four guards are stationed outside instead of the usual two, but they all recognise you, two tugging at the golden handles to pull open the heavy gates for you. Quickly, you make your way over to where all the other maids are lined up, waiting for instructions, when to move. Jeno’s eyes meet yours but he doesn’t acknowledge your presence; after all, you were just another servant girl. Are you really just any other servant girl though? You saw his majesty, the great dynasty and emperor to the Kingdom on his knees, crying and whimpering, breaths ragged. You saw him vulnerable and weak. The moment plagues Jeno’s mind for if he was taught one thing: it was to never let people see your weakness, but to make them worship you as if you placed the sun in the sky and gave them rain, to make them think you were a god.

Jeno wasn't a god, he knew he wasn't—he was barely a king. Yet he had to act as one, forced to fit into the facade no matter what. He would cut his arm off to fit into it, if that meant he was worshipped like the ones before him. To be a king as great as his father. Jeno wasn't the perfect Prince, the media loved to pick on all the little things he did, though they fawned over his looks and the charity work he did, they never allowed him to live a childhood for long. Articles written about temper tantrums he had at the age of four, condemning his mother and her abilities to nurture him. Calling Jeno spoiled when he got his first car at the age of 17, everything he did made it on the front cover of some newspaper, or some magazine who had to throw their two cents on what they think about Lee Jeno, crowned prince and future king.

He doesn’t expect it to be any different now; he expects it to be a lot worse, especially with the rebel groups gaining with more and more support, the increasing worry of the North overthrowing the South is something that runs through all their minds. He’ll be criticised for every move he makes, unable to please anyone, for giving the North what they want would only make the South feel threatened. A deep rooted hatred that dates back centuries, civil wars have broken out many times as they fought for the riches of the land, only worsened by the industrialization of the South. The North couldn’t compete. The country was unified by one of Jeno’s ancestors, being the first to rule both sides and finally uniting the country. Yet the social divide stayed and was never even attempted to be fixed for they all clearly saw it as just the war won and this was their reparations. The unbelievably low employment rate, the famine that runs in their streets. Jeno has never been allowed to visit the North, but rumour has it their villages are run down, roofs with holes and families of 10 living in one room, their electricity unstable, as is the running water. All of which Jeno plans to fix, for it’s the only fault his father had, the only fault of all the Kings before him. Whilst they maintained and kept the South well looked after, the neglect of the North is one mistake they all made. But Jeno vows to look after all his people.  

Jeno is snapped out of his thoughts when a pair of hands reach up to button his collar. And there you are to remind him of how his train of thought even began. He releases a soft sigh from his nose, the cool air brushing against the back of your hands as they diligently work their way down. He watches your every movement, your hands that barely hold on to the buttons of the silk shirt; so scared your hand will graze against his chest. You don’t dare to meet his gaze, taught to lower your gaze, never once look him in the eye, for who were you to challenge his stare? You grew up in the same castle he did, yet not once had your paths crossed, for he was raised in the heavens and you in the depths of hell, to serve and submit to the great prince, who would rule the world you knew. You stepped back, allowing him to see himself in the mirror and he nodded, dismissing you. You bow your head before moving back in line, two other maids going up to place the heavy velvet on his shoulders. He looked like a King.

Stepped further away from him, you could see how his shoulders tensed, how his jaw was shut tight, his finger fumbled. He was nervous, understandably but a redness gleamed under his skin; he was angry. The vein prominent along his neck and temple, beating with every beat of his heart. His stare is unfocused, slipping in and out of consciousness, you can see when he slips into his mind. The words that swirl around him, are so clearly shown, the anxiousness that causes chills to run down his spine, the daunting feeling of not being good enough and the unsettling feeling of being a failure. Jeno probably takes pride in being able to hide his thoughts and feelings, you think. But little does he know, around those whose presences aren’t worth much, he exposes all of himself.

“Leave,” he commands, voice already stern and stiff as he waves his hand, dismissing all in the room. You’re one of the last ones to leave, weary he might break down once again. You linger as much as you can; Mark would kill you if you didn’t. Once stepping out the door, you feel his weariness lift off your shoulder, a heavy sigh slips past your lips as the weight dissipates.

“Finally,” another servant girl cries. “I couldn’t take another second in there,” she said rather too loudly. Your eyes widen, searching to see if there is anyone to hear.

“You can’t just say that outside the Prince’s chambers, Fei,” you nudge her with your elbow, eyes still looking around just in case.

She giggles at how your voice goes higher with concern “Only a fool would not agree. His majesty has been a good Prince, but every time something related to his duties are mentioned he is as stiff as stone and the air weighs down, suffocating us all. You are far from a fool ____ , you know more than I do on the matter, that I know.”

“What is it I know?” you question her, eyebrows arched for her statement intrigues you. Word travels quickly in the castle, the walls whisper all that has been said and done, gossiping starts from hell and spreads like the fire it was born out of. Your ears just happen to fall onto the whispers of the walls, the whispers that make their way around in the moonlight, when dreams take all hostage for the night.

“That is for you to know and never tell me, I don’t need anymore stress,” she sighs/ “Prince Jeno’s is already rubbing on me, especially when he has that brooding expression on his face.” she huffs out in a pout.

“Ah yes, his famous brooding.” She falls into a fit of laughter as she sees your face mimic the expression that you both know all too well. The one where Jeno’s eyebrows are furrowed, jaw tightened, bottom lip held captive by his teeth and the vein that runs down his neck throbbing as the blood runs to a mind working overtime. Her laughter still rings through the air as you pose in different stances with the same expression painted across your face, until suddenly the laughter seizes and a heaviness settles. You see Fei bow her head and wince at the sight. Turning around slowly you pray it is Her majesty, Queen Mother; being a little too hopeful you pray it is Lady Na and most of all you pray it not to be the moody Prince. But when did you ever get what you prayed for? Slowly opening your eyes, you see his broad shoulders ahead of you, decorated with velvet, he stands tall.

He clears his throat and it echoes through the halls. Fei flinches slightly behind you. “Leave us please, Fei.” and she scrambles away.

“Your majesty,” you bow your head, in greeting or apology, both you think.

“So what is it you know?” His question throws you aback, your eyebrows shooting up and blinking as if it would make the words that left his mouth anymore clearer.

“I don’t know much, Your Grace,” you answer quickly, hoping to run back downstairs and away from his painful stare that pricks into your skin, ice cold, sending shivers through you.

“I heard everything,” he says, and it almost sounds like a threat.

“I know only of what the walls happen to whisper, my Lord. I am sure you know mo-” You begin to explain but he cuts you off.

“I don’t,” his voice stern once again, “I have no clue what happens within these walls. I am but a child in his father’s clothes. I was not taught nor have been taught anything. They plan to use me as a puppet, a scapegoat just to dispose of me as they did my father.” His eyes are glossy now and they look at everything but you, for if he sees the pity on your face once again, he’ll hate himself for not hiding what there is to pity about him, properly.

“I don’t know anything of your father’s death, my Grace,” your voice is soft as if not to break him, not when the coronation is moments away. Yet you have. A tear slides down his cheek and he lets out a heavy sigh. You have seen it already, his sadness and anger.

“I want you to find out,” his voice quivers and he cuts himself off to clear his throat once more.

“Please accept my regrets,” you start, but again he doesn’t allow you to speak anymore

“Your regrets are denied,” he says so simply and you can’t help but blink at these words too. “I command you to find out, as your King.” His eyes raise and meet yours, so full of rage, hurt and vengeance.

“You are not my King yet, my Grace, my service is to the crown,” you say so bravely your mind facepalms seconds later.

“I will be now,” he says as he walks past, the red velvet that trails behind him flowing into you, the softness stark in contrast to the stiffening of the air.

You’re dazed, unsure of what you have been thrown into. You prayed for it not to be the Crowned Prince yet the gods gave you the exact opposite, your paths intertwined far more than you would have ever hoped. Running down the stairs as quickly as possible you make your way to the East wing where the chapel is. Hiding behind doors, your people watch in the nooks of the hinges, the small gaps of a slightly ajar door. Crown Prince, Lee Jeno being coordinated as King.

His face is stoic, not a single expression of any emotion, not a single thought could be read. Jeno is fitting into his facade, the tear he shed was wiped away quickly and there was not a single sign it even dropped.

He stands before the priest and he begins to speak. Every person holds their breath, even you, so focused and desperate to hear the words that’ll leave his mouth. You’re sure you’ll only see this once in this lifetime, for a great dynasty is to rule for decades.

“Sire, is his Majesty willing to take the Oath?” The priest asks.

“I am willing,” his voice confident as it carries itself and echoes through the chapel.

The Archbishop nods to a stand by to bring a book, the Bible you presume, Jeno places his right hand upon it. The Archbishop continues to speak “Will you solemnly promise and swear to govern the Peoples of the Great Kingdom of NEO, and of your Possessions and the other Territories to any of them belonging or pertaining, according to their respective laws and customs?”

“I solemnly promise to do so.”

“Will you to your power cause Law and Justice, in Mercy, to be executed in all your judgements?”

“I will.”

And at that, Jeno kneels down at the altar steps and says a promise for all to see. “The things which I have here before promised, I will perform and keep. So help me God.” He then walks back holding the orb in his left and the cross in his right, he makes his way to the throne on the other side, all eyes on him but his are set on the crown that awaits him. He’s assisted down into the throne, the high priest holding up the crown worth the world within his finger and he slowly places it upon his head.

“All hail King Lee Jeno.” He shouts, voice ringing through your ear and all those there.

“All hail King Lee Jeno.” All chant back

“Long live the King,” they all shout in unison.

There is your King.

“This way, your Majesty.” The man behind the camera calls as the shutter clicks. A blinding light forces Jeno to close his eyes and silently groan.

“Mark, what is this for again?” Jeno calls out to the only person he really trusts in this castle. Mark is only a year older than Jeno, raised and trained by his own father, Mark’s sole purpose in life was to serve under Jeno and help keep the castle in order. It’s only been a month since he has officially been put in the position, but unlike Jeno, Mark watched his father run the castle for his whole life. He saw and learnt all it took to make sure everything ran smooth. Mark also grew up alongside Jeno, he ran his schedule since they were young, it was to ensure that Jeno could trust Mark later on and that Mark would have a great understanding of the type of person Jeno was, his likes and dislikes, so he could serve him to his best.

“It is for the NEO Press, my Lord,” he answers back quickly. The NEO Press is arguably the most influential media, the public seem to trust their every word and their opinions on politicians have made or broke some careers. Jeno's father had a very civil relationship with NEO Press, he would always give them the story first never allowing others to twist the truth but he never stopped them from saying what they wanted. Freedom of speech is one thing Jeno's father believed to be of the utmost importance, the NEO Press in fact was the paper that tagged Jeno as a spoiled brat, his father never put an end to it. "If it's not true, why be so bothered by it?" He always said. Yet this felt wrong.

"My father never took any pictures for them, however," Jeno continues pressing Mark for questions. The biting of Mark's bottom lip is enough to indicate to Jeno that it is not something he should say, but who is he to be afraid of other than the king? "Mark I am your King and I demand to know." Jeno's voice is firm and stiff

"The Nobels set up a campaign for you, sire." His voice was weary and weak, almost hoping Jeno wouldn't hear the words that passed his lips.

"A campaign?" Jeno couldn’t conceal his shock and the offence this statement brought. As if he was a politician who had to campaign for their spot in court. He owned the court by blood. The NEO Press, whilst admirable, could easily be bribed; this was no simple coverage of their new King, this was propaganda.

"Just so the transition runs smoothly, my Lord." And at that, Jeno's jaw tightens. He is already being used as a puppet. Already they were controlling him but he won’t allow it. Taking off the silk that drapes around his shoulders, dropping it, he walks out.

"Sire, where are you going?" Mark shouts from behind, his legs trying to keep up with Jeno's.

"I'll shall return in a mere moment," he says, jaw still stiff and hands in fists. He strides down the long halls, where to? Mark has no clue.

The mere moment never arrives as Jeno storms off to his mother’s drawing room, his feet hitting against the marble floor with all his anger and haste, even as the King he runs to his mother for help he thinks to himself but excuses it for being only 21 orbits. He doesn’t even wait for the guards that stand by her door to open it; as they bow to their King, he grabs on to the golden handle and swings the heavy door open. The force and speed of the door cause the door to slam shut just after him, alerting his mother of his entrance. Her head quickly turning towards the door to see who dared to make such an entrance, she let a soft sigh leave her lips as she saw her infuriated son storm up to her but his tracks slowed once he saw she had company.

His eyes blinking at the three bodies that rose to greet him, bowing to their King. “Your majesty, it’s an honour to be in your presence.” The all too familiar and irritating voice of his uncle, Jeno is unsure of his intentions but he sounds all too condescending for him.

“What brings you here?” Jeno ignores the greetings and pleasantries, sitting down by his mother’s side. He examines the two other bodies beside his uncle, one he recognises to be his cousin sister and the other a young man he is sure he has never seen before.

“We ask for your blessing, my Grace.” He stands as if giving a speech to parliament, walking in circles around them all, he begins. “My one and only daughter is to be wed with Huang Renjun.” and at the mention of his name he bows once more before Jeno, introducing himself. “Let us hope his lordship is to bless the holy union of the two”  

His uncle is always conspiring, his daughter just as ambitious, so who is this Hwang Renjun for it would have been a much more powerful marriage if she were to wed a prince. Perhaps it was love, Jeno’s cousin had always been the selfish type; she would never sacrifice such a thing as marriage just for the advantage gain of her father. Yet Jeno couldn’t let his guard down for they are the snakes in his garden. If anyone had killed his father it would have been the man that stands before him.

“Renjun, I don’t believe I have had the pleasure to have heard or met you before,” Jeno begins his interrogation. Who is Huang Renjun? What did he offer that he was able to marry into such a family? What threats did he bring to Jeno? The questions ran in circles around Jeno, his mind running in overdrive as he feared a new possible way to overthrow him. His uncle had always wanted some way for his bloodline to sit on the throne, if it couldn’t be him he wanted it to be his son, yet god had only blessed him with a daughter though it is said she is of the son in a woman's body. A great swordsmanship and archer she is, she cares for horses and her wits is as great as any. She had always been cunning from what Jeno remembers from childhood, squirming her way out of scolding and pushing the blame on Jeno and Lady Na, finding ways out of the community service the three of them would do. She only thought of herself as a child, spoilt by her father, Jeno doubts she’s changed at all. Yet she could never sit on the throne by herself, as a woman it wouldn’t be allowed, so why marry a commoner and not a Prince?

“I am not surprised, my Lord,” Renjun lets out a breathy laugh. “I am but a commoner,” he tells Jeno.

“I see, but you must have some status, for I don’t see my dear cousin marrying a man without one nor my uncle allowing it.” Jeno pushes for answers and again Renjun lets out a soft laugh. “What is it your father does?” Jeno asks

“My father is a businessman, Sire, he works in the heart of the city,” Renjun tells Jeno, his voice clear and precise. He feels no nervousness before Jeno. Even the General quivered more than he, a commoner.

“I presume he is successful.” Jeno looks at the smug face his uncle wore. The media belittled Jeno’s uncle and cousin when the General married into the family, for they didn’t see his cousin before him marrying anyone better, despite her claim to the throne. At least a royal wedding would take the media off of Jeno for a while as well as the nobles and finally Jeno can focus on the cause of his father’s death.

“A billionaire,” Jeno’s uncle brags,”he brings great amounts to our economy.” He places his hand on Renjun’s shoulder and he’s flushed at the comment, shaking his head mumbling something about it being an overstatement.

“The courting season has just begun. I am surprised you chose so quickly, dear cousin.” And at Jeno’s words her head snaps up towards him, smiling. The same smile that Jeno hated as a child, the one that only meant doom.

“Do you not bless our marriage, Sire?” she asks, avoiding Jeno’s statement with a question.

“I bless it, may your marriage prosper, I wish you both nothing but happiness.” Jeno turns to his mother as to what she thinks and she only holds a smile, the crescent eyes of her on display and Jeno can’t help but to mirror it. All three in front of them bow to Jeno in thanks, Renjun taking his brides hand in his, he smiles at her. Jeno truly hopes they will be happy.

“Why don’t you join us for a meal? We already plan to meet with the General and his wife. Please do join us,” Queen Mother offers them an invitation and of course who was one to turn down an invitation from the King's mother. "Jeno my dear, are you busy now or will you join us?" And he simply nods his head, the NEO Press have gotten enough pictures as it is. "Well then let us all make our way," she stands and leads everyone out the room.

No one is to walk in front nor beside the King, not even his mother. It's a lonely act to walk 5 steps in front of everyone else, no one there to accompany him down the long corridors. Though his mother and Renjun do try to include him in the conversation, the space between them is far too great. The words are strained and the reply too delayed to hold a conversation yet it doesn't stop Renjun who walks slightly ahead of the others to keep Jeno company. "I have never met the General, Sire. What of a man is he?" Renjun asks

"I presume a great one, I trust my sisters and their choice in husbands," Jeno says, steps not faulting as he leads them towards the hall. Renjun smiles at this, there's a skip in his steps, a slight bounce Jeno sees. There's slight envy in Jeno as he sees this, for he would love to smile in these halls just as he did when he was young.

They reached the large banquet hall, the doors already opened as maids and servants ran in and out, you saw them enter as Mark had asked you to clean the mess that Jisung had caused by spilling orange juice. Jeno's eyes meet yours for a second that same emptiness surrounds the singular flame of vengeance. A vengeance he's not even sure of, yet it quakes his bones and boils his blood. Quickly you step back into the line of waiting staff, always on standby to serve at just the raise of a hand.

They seat themselves, Jeno at the head of the table to his right, her Grace's suitor, Renjun and her next to him. Jeno’s mother sits opposite him on the long glass table that's decorated with arrangements of flowers, silverware, silk napkins and golden flutes waiting to be used. Jeno's uncle sits beside his mother's side leaving the two remaining chairs for General Na and her Grace, who step in only moments later.

"It is an honour to meet you," Renjun stands at the arrival of the General, who bows his head his way and signals for him to sit.

Jaemin laughs at his words softly as he pulls back the large throne like chairs for his Lady. "It is much more of an honour to meet my wife." He smiles down at her and she scoffs at his playfulness with a soft blush across her cheeks and as he sits he greets all those around the table. "Thank you for inviting us, your majesty," he says to Jeno, snapping him out whatever daze he was engulfed by this time.

"We are family Jaemin," he smiles at him and in return  Jaemin returns an even brighter one. Though Jaemin and Renjun seem like good men, men who Jeno is happy to give his sisters away to, as King he can't help but feel paranoid, maybe even threatened. Though Renjun is bright and clueless, an innocence so pure it is as if a character he plays on stage. Jaemin is charming and sweet but there seems to be a sinister underlying meaning, as if threatening with kindness. Jeno knows all about perception and putting on an act, he knows all about facades. Yet he won't allow these thoughts to invade his mind unless they give reason to.

"Might I ask," Renjun begins, questions aimed at Jaemin, "How is the military dealing with the rebels at Port 127?" The food is being served, and your ears prick up at the sudden talk of political matters so quickly into the meal. Renjun skips all pleasantries, asking the question that would take back all those at the table.

Jaemin stutters slightly, a stark difference from his usual well articulated self who stands in court presenting facts and only showing confidence and reliability. The question is sudden, the sun has barely risen from the horizon and the moon, she still hangs above the clouds. "We are dealing with it the best we can, many men have been deployed and now that his majesty has been officially crowned as King, we can move forward with his help." Renjun was about to open his mouth again, endless questions about to spill out, curiosity sparkling in his eye.

"Do you mind if we choose not to converse about political matters at breakfast, it is a rather glum topic do you not think?" Jeno's mother announces, cutting Renjun off to which he only nods as he sends her a smile. There were many reasons as to why she did it which one is one that Jeno wasn't sure of. Maybe it was her motherly institution, she could feel his anxiety rise and tighten the noose around his neck, could feel the crown suddenly become too heavy to wear for her son who wasn't ready to become an idol for those to worship. Did she do it because she didn't want Jeno's uncle to hear about a sudden uprising that is a threat to the crown, giving him a motive. Whatever the reason Jeno is grateful.

"When is the wedding?" Lady Na asks her sister, who sits opposite, breaking the silence that was looming over Jeno, finally he can breathe.

"By the full moon," she replies coldly, blunt as ever. She was never much of a conversationalist. She considered herself greater than all if not then most, her eyes were always set on the throne but not in the naive way of a five year old, in a much more ambitious way. She was raised with the hunger for power, the thirst for the crown to sit upon her head. She never liked Jeno for this exact reason, a boy destined for greatness they'd say, yet she never saw what was special about him. In fact he was quite the opposite of a King in her eyes, a boy who was quiet and sweet, easily manipulated and gullible. How would someone as soft and kind as him rule over a kingdom? How would he command a military? He was too kind, she thought.

“It was as if it was like yesterday the three of you were running around these great halls and now you are married.” Jeno's mother begins to reminisce, staring at all three, who she considers each as her own. Watching them grow up and spending all the time she could with them, each one of them is her child, though not biologically, the love she feels for the other two is immense. A proud fondness blooms in her chest as she sees the elegance and beauty they have each grown with. She begins to fill the rest of breakfast with anecdotes of a time that seems ancient, of another life that they all wish to fill their days once more. A time where the little moments in life mattered, like the first snow that fell down in winter, the first bloom of the Royal garden, picking apples in the orchard, horse riding with the wind breaking through their hair, staring up at the stars. The universe that is much bigger than the three children that looked up with doe eyes, in absolute awe of the world. Smiles stretched along everyone's lips, occasional bubbles of laughter spilling through and it was as if the air was lighter, Jeno basked in the moment.

Breakfast was quick to be cleared, pulled to the side by Mark afterwards, you followed him to an empty corridor. "Here," he extends his arm and a small, neatly folded piece of paper is held between his thumb and the side of his index finger. He shakes his hand slightly, hurrying you in taking it, looking around to see if anyone was passing by. "It's from his majesty," he emphasises its urgency.

"What does it say?" You ask, eyes wide as you take the paper from his grasp and into your own possession. You weren't shocked to have a note from Jeno come your way but the fact he asked Mark to pass it on, was Mark allowed to know?

"If it is not for my eyes then I would not wound his majesty by intercepting and reading words not meant for me," Mark tells you as if that was blatant, he scoffs. It's now you realise how well Jeno knows Mark, to be able to trust him to not even have any curiosity to open the note, how much respect Mark has for Jeno to not even dare to have that curiosity.

You stare down at the paper, playing around with edges, you are hesitant to open it. Scared that it will only make this dreaded reality more of one, if you ignore it will it go away? Of course it wouldn't, you shake your head, he is the king and anything his majesty wants, he gets. "Just open it already," Mark interrupts your thoughts, he rolls his eyes at your hesitance. "It would not be anything serious, a private note probably is him asking to bed you and nothing more.." You’re taken back slightly by the unfiltered words that leave Mark, eyes wide and he only laughs at your reaction. "His majesty is a grown man, ___," he laughs once again, turning around to leave, lifting his hand as a gesture of farewell. “Have fun," he giggles once more.

"Fuck you, Mark Lee," you grunt under your breath as you finally pry open the neatly folded paper, rough tears along the sides and black ink still fresh. You can smell it, you read the cursive writing, written with a fine and steady hand. The words look like a form of artwork, the way each letter swirls and connects to the next with intricate detailing to each letter, Jeno's royal blood clearly running through the ink itself. He writes with elegance and poise, as a king should. "My chambers, midnight." The note reads nothing more, and you roll your eyes at the words. If Mark was to read the note, he wouldn't have thought anything other than the lewd thoughts that already cloud his mind, but you know this note means death is only coming closer.

"____." The familiar voice of Fei calls out to you, "Jisung spilt more orange juice." And you throw your head back, a loud groan passing your lips as you curse Park Jisung in as many ways as possible. "I'm coming," you shout back, slipping the note into the pocket of your apron.

Mopping the marble floor of the great banquet hall, the second time that day did not put anyone in a good mood. Jisung is lucky he did not break any glasses, for that would cause a mess that none would have let him through. As you and Fei finally ring the last orange soaked towel into a bucket, knees sore and arms aching, you finally sit back and let out heavy sighs. "I'm going to kill Jisung." Fei falls onto her back, legs splayed out, the rise and fall of her chest rapid. You mimic her actions, allowing yourself to be spread along the shining marble floor, you laugh at her comment before allowing silence to engulf you both for a moment, closing your eyes, you just breathe. Until broken, "What’s this?" Fei asks, a small piece of paper in between her fingers.

"Hmm," you hum as you pry one eye open. At first you don't realise but then panic crashes down on you all at once, throwing your body forward, you jump up but it's too late. The note was already open and her eyes scanned every letter that was so beautifully written.

"Holy shit," her eyes are wide and you see them read the note over and over again, "Holy. shit," she says much slower, emphasising each word to which you roll your eyes, snatching the note from her hand.

"It is not what it seems." You get up off the floor and make your way out the banquet hall, avoiding her begging eyes that demand answers to the million of questions that run through her head.

"There is no way it is not like what it seems," she rebuts, "No one meets with the king in his own chambers, let alone at midnight." She hurries after you, following you as you turn through the complex maze of corridors.

"It is not from his majesty," you scoff at her as if she is foolish enough to fall for it.

"No one writes as beautifully, no commoner that is for sure." She's quick to argue back, there's no fooling her. Anyone with functioning eyes could see the painted words belong to no one less of a King. You curse the King and his constant need to show his authority, even in writing. You guess he does not mind the rumours, for they have no effect on him, but for you, society has decided it will leave you stained.

"Will you say yes?" She asks as you enter the kitchen, busy as always but Fei was never one to know her surroundings as she carries on loudy, "Will you go to see him?"

"See who?" another voice intercepts, letting out a deep sigh as your skin irk, annoyance so clear and evident amongst your features but it doesn't stop anyone.

"The King," Fei is quick to answer the other maids as if peer pressure was to get answers out of you. "He requests an audience with her at midnight." the women squeal at the words that leave her mouth. Any woman would think lucky of you, to be favoured by the King. You would be dressed in riches, become a lady of the court and if God blessed you, a child is what you'd gift to his majesty. Though the child would not be in line for succession, they would be looked after as royal blood ran through their veins and you as their mother.

"There is no choice but to see him," another tells the two of you, much older she has been in the castle since you were children. You suppose she's seen this happen before, yet little do they know of the actual situation.

"Personally I find General Na much more attractive." Higgles explode at the statement, lightening the mood slightly you find yourself laughing along. "Oh and have you seen the new Sire, Sir Hwang is beautiful." more giggles arise as the women discuss their type in men of the Royals.

"Oh have you seen the portrait of Lee Haechan, he is as handsome as they get," someone else chimes in and everyone bursts into giggles again, lungs seizing to work. "The criminal?" Shock paints its way onto Fei 's face, causing all of them to laugh once more. Your annoyance subsides as you giggle with them, long forgotten was your note and instead conversation flowed of men the women would accept in a second, if they had been asked.

Midnight arrives much sooner than you would have liked, the stillness of the night disrupted with the erratic beating of your heart, the beauty of the moon stolen by the anxiousness that settles in your stomach. You pace back and forth the corridor that nears the King's chambers. Two guards stationed outside as always, you're hesitant to go up to them. Yet they know of your arrival, expecting you, they don't question a thing. Instantly opening the doors to you, they allow you in, quick to close the door behind you as well as if they were told to conceal you. You walk slowly and quietly through the drawing room, hoping the King had fallen asleep and giving a good reason to have left without making your presence known. Yet he is not, he waits for you, the balcony door left open, spring nights sweeps its way through and into the room, a chill running through you. You stepped outside to find him, the moonlight shining down on him, his skin kissed by Selene, beauty gifted by Aphrodite. The blood that runs through his veins is truly one of Gods. He restores the beauty of the night.

You settle next to him, bowing as you come closer but he doesn't turn nor does his eyes even acknowledge your presence. They never leave the endless garden of flowers, yet you think he looks beyond them. You stand in silence for a while, not daring to snap him out of his daze. Standing behind him, you too allow yourself to get lost in your thoughts and the beauty of the night sky, walking amongst the stars you think of your parents who have long gone by now, amongst the stars they lie and burn into the next life. You think of your own life and the meaning it holds, not much you think will it ever be anything that what it is now? Your eyes look towards the King, who still looks onwards, and you think maybe this is where you gain more.

"Is there something on my face?" His hand reaches up to cheek, voice snapping you out of your thoughts. He rubs at the skin softly, pulling back his hand to see if there was any residue.

"No Sire," you are quick to respond, shaking your head to emphasise it.

His eyes finally meet yours as he turns himself to you, "I suppose you know why I have summoned you," he starts off, about to continue to speak until he sees a shiver shoot down your spine, every muscle of yours slightly shaking. He stops. "Are you cold?" His voice is stern as if he's telling you rather than asking. "Sit," he ushers you towards the chairs that are carelessly placed, tugging on the velvet that wraps round him he covers your bare arms in hope of stopping the shivers. Jeno was always polite, he never went out of his way to burden anyone, never asked for much if he was able to do it himself but this is far from just being polite and you think about the dangers you will be placed in.  

"The one I suspect most, is none other the next in line." His statement doesn't surprise you, if you were to bet on anyone it would also be placed on Jeno's uncle. Growing up in the castle you have had countless encounters with the man in mention. He was cold, jealousy clear in his eyes as they set upon Jeno who only furthered his grasp on the crown and every time he saw him it worsened for Jeno had been growing, if he was to even sit on the throne momentarily he would have to hurry. Though it seemed the man tried his best to love Jeno, bringing him presents from travels abroad though now you think it was to conceal his raging hate. "Though there are others." He starts again, "The General, any of the Earls," he lists out his suspicions.

"And what exactly is it you want me to do Sire?" You ask him, causing his eyes to drift towards you once more.

"Investigate them," he says as if it was as simple as that. "As a maid, no one suspects a thing. You have access to private conversations, others will tell you of the conversations they have overheard." He begins to explain your role.

"Why not ask Mark?" you cut him off, he's slightly startled, his eyebrows shooting up and eyes widening at your sharpness in tone  but he lets it slip past.

"Mark is not one for gossip. He only remembers what's important and to him that is seating and formal dinner arrangements, he takes a lifetime to tell a story and the fact he is so close to me is enough for people to be wary of him. You however have known all the people in this castle, since your first breath. They trust you and no one knows of my commands, if anything, they think I am sleeping with you and that is all." So he knows about the insolent rumours and you roll your eyes upon hearing them. "I am certainly not that bad for you to be offended," he says in mock pain, a slight smile playing on his lips and you did not think the King was one to joke.

"Strictly speaking Sire, I have no opinion of you," you reply honestly, you were never one to overly please the Royals. There were enough Nobels for that.

"Very well," he clears his throat of the slight awkwardness "Any other questions?" He asks

"When do we start, my Grace?"

“When the moment arises, you will know.”

Time flies as if it were an arrow, now in the king’s country seat, never a day of rest and Jeno finds himself in the same position as he did just over a month ago. Standing before the large group of nobles who all bow at his feet, holding knives behind their backs. "Long live the King" they chant, ironic Jeno thinks. With a wave of his hand they all take their seats, smoothing out the creases in their gowns, they settle. Jeno's mother is not with him today, as he is now officially King it is not permitted for her to be with him yet Kun is still beside him and the crowd is no one unusual yet it doesn't stop the jitters crawling up Jeno's skin making it itch.

Hours and hours this lasts until Jeno hears the words that finally arrive "Lastly we speak of the rebels who refer to themselves as the Helios," Kun's voice rings through the chamber, every man tensing at the mention of the rebel group. Kun continues going through details that need to be discussed. "Since the bombing of Port 127, the military has managed to save all, not a single life was taken and managing to capture two prisoners." Applause echoes throughout the great hall, words of praise and compliments thrown towards Jaemin and Jeno himself is clapping, smiling his way. "Yet we worry with the upcoming royal wedding, it allows opportunity for enemies, Sire," Kun turns to Jeno, asking him for his input. Jeno hears the many murmurs, some discussing the delay in such a large scale event, some suggesting max military protection for the elite.

"The ceremony of their union will go on," Jeno silences the mutters. "We will have the army patrolling the streets as well as guarding the chapel. The staff will be only the castle staff, for those are the only ones worth placing our trust in." Though some look appeased, Jeno can see the few with fear evident in their eyes or a scrawl

'Sire, please consider the delay of such an event," a voice shouts out and many more follow in agreement, their voices getting louder and louder until all together they fall with the bang of the gavel. Kun orders silence. "One at a time," his voice vibrates authority into each man.

"My Grace," Jeno's uncle stands before the court, "I see no reason as to why my daughter should have to wait any further in being wedded." Jeno rolls his eyes at his tone and gesture, hand to his chest but the smirk so evident on his face, he causes the red of anger to rise up to the surface of Jeno’s skin, an unbearable heat taking over.

"Reason? The risk of her breathing her last on such a day, is not reason enough?" A voice shouts out and chaos ensues once more. Screams of those who agree, shouting of those who disagree, gasps of those in which fear has rooted deeply in.

"Order!" Kun shouts once more with the bang of the gavel that makes its way into Jeno's mind, a throbbing in his head as all the voices are quick to silence themselves, a few murmurs still hanging in the air. Jeno rests his head against his palm, eyes half closed and with a deep sigh he motions with the flick of his wrist for the court to resume.

"So you fear the North? You fear Helios?" Jeno's uncle says once more. "Do you not have enough faith in the strength of our men, our army. No faith in our General who has dealt with attack after attack?" Jeno's uncle spins around to preach these words to every man that sits in court until finally he has spun back, facing Jeno before he could ever think about changing his mind. "Do you not put your faith in our King?" He lifts an eyebrow, challenging the King.

Jeno's jaw tightens at his words, for they do not put their faith in him. "The wedding will go on, my sister is to marry when she would like." And at his final word, Kun bangs the gavel once more, dismissing the court. Jeno is quick to leave, he does not wait anymore for the first few nobles to leave. Each of his steps filled by fury, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes set ablaze. This heart hammers against his chest, his skin burns as the roaring flame of rage engulfs his every thought, a red haze blinding him. He hears Mark’s hurried steps after him though they are muffled by the rage that rushes towards his head causing his ears to pop.

"My Lord,'' Mark huffs out. "Please, what is the haste?" He grabs onto his forearm, turning Jeno to face him. Tears run down in streams, his breaths ragged once more as his chest heavies rapidly “My Grace.'' Mark is taken aback, his grip loosens and his hand slowly falls back to his side, he has no idea what to do, no idea on how to stop the shaking, the constant flood of tears that blurs Jeno’s vision. He wasn’t taught how to deal with this, regardless of how many times he’s seen his majesty fall apart before him, rage aching throughout him that he could only cry, Mark couldn’t do a thing. For instinct called for him to hold him close to his chest, hoping his warmth and the regular drumming of his heart would sooth him but he wasn’t allowed to touch such a figure of great power, Mark already got ahead of himself by grabbing onto his majesty. He must not step out of line again but Jeno’s head falls on his shoulder, tears soaking through his dress shirt and Mark can’t stop his hand that goes to rest in Jeno’s hair, patting his head slowly. The King sobs.

This was everything but a nightmare, Mark wouldn’t wake him up with the streams of golden sunlight that cause his eyes to sting. Jeno’s greatest fears that blossom in nightmares bloom in reality, his fear of not being enough. His fear of being easily manipulated, losing his throne, losing the crown that sits heavy on his head. His fear of disappointing his father, even in death the man’s approval is all Jeno thinks of.

He rests on Mark’s shoulder until all the tears have fallen, until the shaking has stopped and until the rage has subsided. He sniffles against Mark's shoulder and lets out small giggles as he pulls away seeing the oddly shaped wet stains, he mumbles an apology and Mark can’t help but let out soft laughter too. “I ask you of a favour, Mark,” Jeno stands straight, fixing the velvet that drops from his shoulders and smoothing the wrinkles in his dress shirt, “Give this note to ____.” his voice is soft and slightly strained, he hands Mark the neatly folded parchment with teared edges.

“I’ll send them with tea Sire,” Mark says, turning instead of taking the note in hand. Curiosity was only natural but Mark always finds a way to keep his own in check, Jeno smiles as he watches him turn the corner and once out of sight he makes his way to his chambers.

Being called by the King was something you constantly expected, constantly dreaded, for each time the other would smirk and those brave enough would chime in a few chants or whistles. Fei would always give you a pointed look regardless of you assuring her that you hadn’t slept with Jeno. "Anxiousness?" Fei questions as you explained the frequent episodes his highness faces, the quivering and shaky breaths and how you were the one to find him in such a state.

"Yes," you confirm as you stir the brewing jasmine tea. She accepts the explanation but her eyes still tell a different story and they follow you as you make your way up the marble steps. Silver tray carefully balanced in hand, you walk slowly up towards the King’s chambers, his large doors as daunting as ever, the intricate gold that spirals up the painted white wood and long slim handles that fit perfectly in hand. Two guards as always, ready to hoist open the door as soon as they see you but the door doesn’t open as widely as it usually does, instead just a slither. Jeno slips into the crack, revealing himself to you, he doesn't say a word he doesn’t have to for his eyes says it all. Fury, anger, rage. They all pulse through him, though dull they seep into the bloodstream, effect everlasting. His hands graze over yours, thumb slipping into your palm and instead of the smoothness of a King’s thumb that has not seen a single day of work, rough parchment scratches you and instantly your hand wraps into a fist. He takes the tray off your hands and before you can even look up once again, the doors are pulled shut.

You waited until you were round the corner, out of sight of the foot guards, you opened notes that seemed one for lovers, straightening the folds of the paper. It read a decipher, “midnight is upon u," the phrase was strange and out of place to anyone who's eyes would fall upon it but you understood it all the same, the moment arises on the balcony almost a fortnight when midnight had been upon you and now midnight is fast approaching once more, you suppose it was something similar he read in one of the many scripts of literature, arrangements not many have had the privilege of reading. Jeno was definitely one of the few in the kingdom of such a high level of education and though the inferences of such saying has not much meaning to you, you still appreciate the beauty of words. "Midnight is upon us."  you whisper to yourself and as you turn the parchments corner slightly, in the smallest font, you squint to see "I under the moonlight of a full moon."

The full moon arrived quickly and as expected Jeno stood in the moonlight that came in the form of cameras shuttering at every moment as the nation watched the Princess walk down the aisle. White, pristine gown, she is gorgeous. The halls heavily guarded, fear could be smelt in the air as every Nobel gathered in one place, all seated in rows and rows. It would be so easy to cause chaos, too easy for the Helios. Commoners waiting outside, rows and rows of children holding bunches of flowers to hand to their princess as a congratulations. A gathering that asked for massacre but that was pushed far back in your mind, as the looming orders from his majesty clouded all.

"______." Jisung taps your shoulder, calling you, he takes your eyes off the setting sun and the rising moon. You meet his smile and naturally one falls upon your lips. "They'll be entering the ballroom soon, Mark-" he's cut off by his own laughter that he couldn't keep in at the sight of your face dropping at the mention of the name. "Hey come on, Mark's not that bad." Jisung walks you over to the ballroom that where the mentioned awaits.

"He is when he's barking orders at us," you roll your eyes and Jisung laughs once more at the annoyance that paints your face. "He acts like I haven't seen him piss his pants," you scoff.

"In his defence he was 8," Jisung defends Mark who isn't present to do so yet does little to hide the amused look as the memory floods back into his mind.

"And you, barely 5, still had better control of your bladder," you smile at a time long gone, as you near the large ballroom. Servants and maids at every corner, waiting for a raise of the hand, the clearing of a throat or just one who just speaks to the air. Dozens of golden flutes filled with golden liquid in hand, platters filled with small and delicate starters. We wait to work through the crowd, unnoticed we go until we are needed.

"Where have you been?" Mark marches his way towards you as soon as he sees your figures make their way through the entrance. His voice is stern but he’s Mark, his kindness is overwhelming and the sparkling of his eyes are too precious for one to ever feel intimidated. He’s highly respected however, his leadership and caring nature making him the castle’s sweetheart, you are certain he’s gotten proposals from all who set eyes on him, some even from high nobels. He’s rejected them all though, the excuse of a wife would only get in the way of his duties but everyone knows that’s not true. For a moment all speculated he already was in love with another but he didn't ever leave the castle so you disregarded the rumours.  

“We were watching the ceremony,” you said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world as you all moved out of the way of the entrance, last minute decorations and drinks coming through the door. “You know how excited Jisung gets during big events,” you tease and Mark lets out a little laugh releasing a little tension from earlier.

“The decorations are pretty,” Jisung mumbles in a pout as he defends himself and you can’t help but smile at his pure innocence, he’s adorable. Nor can Mark as he lets out his squealing laugh as he hits Jisungs shoulder before squeezing his cheeks and calling him cute.  

The church bell rings and Mark jumps out of his skin, the sound ripping through the air and Mark is quick to shout out orders, directing everyone to their stations. “Head on now.” He doesn’t bother to face you two as his eyes scan over the ballroom once more, everything must be perfect. They begin to flood in, best gowns on display, a sea of a thousand colours. Fanfare blares through the hall as his majesty walks through, the crowds parting as the red sea once did, his mother on his arm and then another blow of the trumpet and the bride and groom walk through followed by Jeno’s uncle. The third and final call of attention as the general and her grace walk through. The three calls before judgement arrives. “The night has only begun,” Mark whispers and he couldn’t have been more correct.

The violin cuts through the air and the string quartet begins their piece, diluting the chatter that arrives with the nobles. Jisung is instantly pulled away by the raise of a hand, rushing away quickly with a dozen golden flutes your eyes follow his figure until he’s washed away. The crown is so obviously burning into you, his eyes not leaving your figure for a second and you can practically hear his thoughts from here, questioning why you aren’t moving. Why haven't you started your quest and followed through with his orders. Lee Jeno has no patience you think to yourself as you too grab onto a tray of the gold liquid, then again why should he, he is a king.

You navigate through the crowd, avoiding nobles who are known to be too needy, you're too busy for that you think. You pass by the thrones that sit above the crowd, Jeno’s eyes still following your every move, you send a wink his way and watch his face contour in confusion or slight disgust you aren’t too sure. Either way his furrowed eyebrows and slight pouting were amusing, something you find yourself in need to survive this night. Continuing to ignore the lesser nobles, you make your way towards the number one suspect. He stands there tall, front and centre, a crowd surrounds him congratulating him on the marriage of his daughter. He speaks with pride, his head held up high, he waves his hand up as he his eyes meet yours and instantly you are at his side, serving the many flutes to the people that are practically on their knees worshipping him. He speaks of his new son, bragging to all who’ll listen and they entertain him by asking question after question. They gasp, ooh and aah at all he has to say, feeding the enormous ego. If you thought Jeno was entitled, you were mistaken for pride took human form in his uncle.

You hang around them even when you have finished serving, no one thinking twice about your position nor caring for you were invisible to them. The crowd around him soon dwindles as the stories begin to repeat themselves and as the floor opens up for the dancing to commence. The string quartet playing the usual ballroom music, you hum a long, listening in on the conversations around, ignoring all hands that raise up unless it leads you closer to Jeno’s uncle. A countess waves her hand and you're quick to approach, never leave the rich waiting is what you learned very quickly, pretending not to hear they will forgive for there is always some else there who’ll serve but slow service is never forgiven. You refill her flute and she raises it to her lips instantly, emptying it of its contents and she again motions for you to replace it again, a bored expression on her face as her husband hangs on to every word that falls from Jeno’s uncle's mouth. “Poison?” Your ears perk up immediately.

“Very effective, quick execution and not a single suspicion,” he says loudly as if murder was not a crime, even for someone of such high status and power there is no avoiding punishment for murder, depending who it is. “So I hear,” he's quick to add.

“Of course, Sire,” and then the two men laugh, giving all too knowing looks. “Hypothetically speaking. how would one know such poisons.”

"Standard herbology" he tells him "Though I suppose not all have such privilege to study the concept," he boasts, you and the countess both rolling your eyes. "I think I have some files stored away in a country seat, I'll be sure to invite you sometime or if so urgent I'll send a messenger with the docu-"

Darkness. Silence. Nothing but the heaviness and the loud beating in your chest, your eyes are screwed shut, unable to open, stinging with each attempt. Suddenly it’s cold, every hair on your body raising, chills running down your spine, your heartbeat in your mind, it’s pulsing and suddenly all noises flood back in at once, a ringing in your ear causing you to wince. Five shots explode in the air, screams and cries as people push past you, some falling to their knees. The many golden flutes that were once in your hand now shattered on the floor, grey smog invades the room as the moonlight floods in through the gaping hole made in the wall, a foul smell following after it. It’s sickening and you feel bile threatening to rise at the back of your throat as the stench overwhelms you. You don’t have to be told what it is, it is potent and clear, the smell of burning humans is so distinct. For no smell is as foul.

Another two shots, the lights flicker for seconds before failing completely, the room a void, the once beautiful moonlight posing sinister. Another shot followed by screams, a body falling and another. You scream with them, you cry as death nears you closer and closer.  There’s a tug at your wrist as you’re pulled back into the rushing crowd that runs out of the ballroom. A tall figure pulling at you, dragging you through the crowds of panic, your vision still foggy you can’t make out who pulls at your arm until all the grey smog has fully cleared and you’re out into the long corridors where the crowds of people are packed. There are wails of cries that echo constantly through the hallway, yet still you are pulled through them all until you find yourself in the all too familiar kitchen downstairs. The rush and the blurs finally stop, enabling you to see clear and concise images. You finally see Jisung who stands before you, hand still holding on tight to your wrist as he looks around for what you aren't sure of. Your breaths ragged, your hands still shake in his grip.

You pull your wrists out if his grasp, turning his attention back to you, his head turns. "Blood," you manage between breaths,  lifting up a rag that sits on the table and pressing it to his head. He lets out a surprised squeal escape his lips that form into an "o" shape, he hadn't noticed the wound inflicted on his head, hadn't noticed the blood that slowly dripped down the side of his face, for adrenaline coursed throughout his whole body. He winces as you press the now champagne soaked rag to his temple once more, scrunching his nose and knowing better than to complain to you. "And Mark?" worry evident on your features and voice, though your words so few.

"Assisting his majesty," his reply instant.

"Mark is anything but a guard," you hiss as you press the rag harder to his temple, he winces again, holding on your wrist until you ease the pressure.

"It is his duty." Jisung argues back

"To serve, not babysit." You grab Jisung's wrist replacing your own hand with his. "Keep it to your head, I'll return in a mere moment.”

"Off to where?" He asks, watching you ascend the stairs back towards the panicking crowds but you ignore his question. “______!” He shouts, “It’s not safe! We need to get out of here”

The nobles clamored into their carriages, all eager to leave the premises and back to their own private estates but if one is not safe in the King's Country seat, where would they be safe? Though you guess they finally realise their irrelevance in society.  Helios were not after minor influences of society, they were here for the crown.

Jeno sat above the rest of the world, the crown sitting above him. He looks down on all and now he is on his knees, at the mercy of the world.  His hands shake and shake no matter how much he tries to stabilize them, eyes focused on nothing but them, he uses all his might and yet still they shake. Another thing he has lost control over, his own body or did he never have control over it? For all the times he couldn’t help the raging emotions that broke the dam causing tears to fall. Jeno is a king yet he has no control over anything, neither his people nor himself.

Fear eats away at him, anxiety crippling him and shame looming over him; it clouds his decisions and judgment for all he wants is to please those around him. He let his uncle push him against the wall, allowing him to make a fool of him once more. It was Jeno’s final decision to have the wedding despite the risks, he had practically put a huge bullseye on himself, a target for Helios. He grips onto his crown, pointed tops digging into the skin of his palms, Jeno pushes it harder until he feels the drawing of blood, until he feels the sting.  He clutches on to it before throwing the crown so it lays beside him, his crimson blood dripping down the sides of it. It strangles him, chaining him to this misery, he struggles to breathe in its presence. He doesn't deserve to wear the symbol of ultimate power he thinks . For he has anything but power. And it's here he cries once more to his father, "please" he begs, "I was not ready nor am I now.” He allows the tears to break past the dam once more, too weak to hold them in, a pain too great. “Come back…. Please,” he whimpers.

It’s upon the sound of the doors being hoisted open that makes Jeno turn to see your figure, you stand fists tightened until you see the shine of Jeno’s eyes and you immediately drop them. “I told Mark, I was to be kept alone,” he manages between sniffles.

“He is unaware of my presence Sire,” you tell him and Jeno is instantly intrigued for if you were to show face it would be with information of any sought.

“Then what is it you come to tell your King?” He asks and you think how he still manages to place the facade over himself once more, even in such vulnerability. For the title is so clearly driving him to insanity.

“Tell me Sire, what does it mean to be King?” You ask as you sit a little behind him.

“You deny my question?” He responds

“And you mine? Do you not have answers?” You respond. Questions with questions, you answer each other in a loop, no answers being found. Yet Jeno has more at stake then you, for if he simply denies to answer, so do you.

“To be perfect,” he finally replies, looking down towards his still trembling bloody hands.  

“Perfect does not exist,” you tell him.

But he shakes his head “It is not for you to understand,” he sighs. “For even if it were not real, the illusion must be there. To make reality into perfection, a king makes perfect.”

“Seems more like a coward than a King.” Your tongue lets loose, unfiltered your words are and you wonder when you truly lost your mind because you would very much like it back, for this foolishness is unexplainable.

He doesn’t seem to mind though as he lets laughter escape his lips and it’s here you truly wonder if he has also lost his mind. “I suppose they are the equivalent,” he lets out laughter, so loud it rings. He sounds insane, the image of a king on his knees before the streaming moonlight that’s let in through the open balcony doors, crown thrown to the side decorated with his blood. The same blood that drips down onto the floor, it seems crazy. Yet he speaks truth that no other man would be so brave enough to utter, you wonder is he insane or is he so aware of reality.

“What would you want King to mean, Sire?” Jeno is taken aback by these words for he has never once thought that it could have another meaning, for what he was taught had been installed for generations. His blood carries such honour and riches, he is the sole heir of NEO given the best education and luxuries and it takes a servant’s questioning  for him to think about how intends to rule. Jeno was truly not ready, for all he knew was he was to sit on that throne, to place the crown above his head.

“Fair.” He answers, “I want to be just, I want to end this war and I want to be better for my people. To fill my father’s place and be better than my father and his father and all those before him. I want a united nation, North and South put aside. We are all the same, the farmers in the north and the industry workers in the south, they are no different. Me and you are no different.” He grabs onto his crown, holds it up to the sky, moonlight shining through the jewels and light refracts on to your face. Blinding, you squint as you watch Jeno crown himself King, and he rises before you. For this was his true coronation.

“So tell me what you have found,” he doesn’t ask, he demands. And you rise to your feet, standing next to the King who claims you as his equal.

“Your uncle speaks of poisons to a count, says they are effective with not a trace left for suspicion. Documents kept in some country seat, he intends to invite said count or send a messenger. It is not much but it is worth investigating.” You tell him as you both stare out into the midnight sky once more.

“For murder, regardless my father or not has to be punished. The threat alone is incriminating enough.” He responds, aware of the slight fault in your voice. His reassurance telling you, you have succeeded him.

Jeno was to return to the castle instantly, his hands now wrapped in bandages, he sits in a carriage with Mark who doesn’t question what happened, even when he sees the wounds as he changes the dressing. Jeno supposes Mark knows their self inflicted, for after the attack he had been sure to check for even any slight tear of Jeno’s skin. Jeno doesn’t wear his crown today, even though you washed the blood away, he finds his head to be lighter without it. He is the crown he decides, he the symbol of ultimate power.

“Gloves, Sire.” Mark holds them open for Jeno to slip his hand into.

“What for?” Jeno asks though he instantly places his hands in.

“A summit awaits your arrival. I assumed you would want to keep this hidden.” Mark says, head bowed as he makes sure the gloves fit securely, all whilst trying his best not to hurt him. “I am sorry if my assumption is wrong,” he makes sure to add.

“Thank you Mark,” is all Jeno says and the carriage falls into silence once more.

Jeno has no idea where he would be without Mark, truly Jeno owes him his life. For not only has he been the greatest of help, he has remained to be the only person in Jeno’s life he has ever even considered a friend. His only friend. “Mark!” Jeno calls .

“Yes Sire.” And as always instantly Mark’s head whips up towards Jeno, ready to hear his orders.

“Call me Jeno.”

“Please accept my regrets, my Grace, but I simply could not.” Mark’s voice is high pitched and squeaky as it always does when he’s surprised. Jeno thinks back to when he told him he had taken his father’s amulet once and Mark had the same gasp and squeal. His voice high pitched, even higher than a seven year olds is usually, as he forced Jeno to march back into the King’s chambers to return it. Jeno can’t help but smile as he reminisces.

“Regrets denied. Truly Mark you wound me.” Jeno fakes a hurt expression as he clutches onto his chest. “I did not know it would have to come to this but I suppose you leave me no choice. It’s a command. I command thee to call me Jeno.”

Mark is left somewhat speechless but Jeno can hear the cogs turning in his head and he knows his words are just on the tip of his tongue. “Mark, just say it,” Jeno sighs as he stares out the window.

“Uh yes Sire, I mean Jeno,” he stumbles over his words and the word sounds foreign out of his mouth but Jeno likes it. “Why so suddenly, your majesty?”

“Jeno,” he corrects quickly before Jeno could mention it and at this Jeno smiles.

“Sudden? If anything this is long overdue. I have known you my whole life Mark, there is not a single human on this earth that deserves the right to call me by my name more than you. You are my friend, the only one at that.” Mark only dips his head smiling, flustered he is, he doesn’t respond to what Jeno says.

“I have a question.” Jeno once again pulls Mark’s attention back onto him and it’s now he thinks he’s getting his own back for all the times Mark has interrupted his thoughts. “What do you think of me as King?”

“I’m not quite sure what you mean Sire?”

“Jeno,” he reminds him “ And I mean, do you think I make a good one?”

“I think you try your best. In the end that’s all we ask,” Mark responds and Jeno couldn’t have asked for a better answer. “You’ll do well, Jeno. I know so because I know you. You were born to be King.” Mark adds on with a smile.

“Thank you Mark.”

As soon as Jeno arrived back to the castle he made his way to the council hall, two guards now accompany him even in the palace walls along with Mark. “You will be discussing the attack on your Country Estate, in Neozone, the General will give a report on how he dealt with the situation as well as the victims and casualties. From there it is up to you to accommodate the redemptions you see fit to give the families that have suffered.” Mark briefs Jeno quickly on the emergency summit as they walk down the long corridors.

“Got it.” Jeno nods his head as the grand doors are pulled open. All rise once they spot Jeno’s figure entering through the door, awaiting him by the entrance is Kun who now escorts him to the throne, instead of Mark who waits behind. Jeno flicks his wrist and they all fall back into their seats, except Kun who now walks back into the stand to lead the discussions.

“Today we call you all for the discussion of the attack on his majesty’s country estate in Neozone, the attack was carried out by the Helios, a terrorist organisation run by Lee Haechan. You all are aware of this but the new identification of the leader is thanks to General Na, who will inform us on the attack in further detail.

Jaemin takes to the middle and stands there tall, he doesn't have any parchment with him unlike all the rest who present in parliament, “The rebel group confirmed this morning with an exclusive interview with the Neo Times, a northern media, that they were indeed the group that attacked the manor last evening.” he begins “Though the full guard of the castle had been moved into Neozone to guard his majesty and his guests, our full force was spread thin as we patrolled the coast, towns as well as the manor. To have prevented such a high scale attack we would have needed military involvement. However that would have put every other major landmark at risk, me and the men I had available worked our best to ensure a minimise of casualties.” There are a few scoffs as he talks but none truly daring to be loud enough for Jaemin to hear, they respect him, Jeno thinks to himself.

Jaemin continues to explain the severity of the attack, “The explosion was only to clear the rear wall, though due to the layout of the ballrooms set up, five lives were taken here. This allowed infiltration of an enemy we are not too sure of. Seven shots were fired, five into the air and two into the crowd, each one taking a life. Nobles were taken from the Kim family as well as the Wong family. A total of seven lives lost.”

“You say you aren’t sure of the ones who shot in the ballroom, how so is that possible?” Someone dares to interrupt, Jaemin pauses to look at Kun who signals for him to answer the question, the question we all were thinking.

"We believe “someone who works for the crown has betrayed your highness' trust and either gave an entrance to the attackers or are the attackers"

"Impossible." Jeno interrupts "everyone who served us that evening, having been serving the Lee family for generations. I place my trust in each and everyone of them, my life in their hands more than I would in yours General." Wide eyes and mutters erupt but Jeno doesn't feel threatened, not anymore.

"I understand your view your majesty but please do not rule the possibility out" Jaemin says calmly but the look in his eyes burn fury "as for why we struggled to deal with the attackers, they had specialised equipment that we believed and have now confirmed to have been stolen from "camp 119" a military base. I and the NEO Guard will further investigate breaches in the military and with the help of his majesty I request permission to do the same for the castle staff."

"Is it wise to focus on an inside rat rather than the bigger problem here General. As you say your men are already spread out thin, I would hate for such investigations to get in the way of proper defence if another attack was to happen" Jeno presses Jaemin for his incompetence. "The truth is we all put our trust in you and your men last time we gathered in these walls, you have failed us once. Do not do it again."

"And I ask you my Grace, to not be so easily pressured into making decisions that put us in a vulnerable state." Jaemin presses into Jeno's flaw, his mistake. "Helios is a great enemy and I cannot turn a blind eye to their strength regardless if they are northerners or not. So I ask you my Grace to not make me an enemy and to help me for without your support this is truly a lost cause."

The problem is what Na Jaemin portrays Jeno as, a hurdle in defeating the Helios. He makes it seem as if Jeno's actions are leading to the difficulties the military face, a way to hide their incompetence and the nobles will fall for it for they have placed their trust in Jaemin already. They will rather watch NEO fall than admit being wrong.

"You have all my support, that I assure you General. I just ask you to take heed of my insight." And with that council drawn to a close, Kun banging the gavel only once today, an accomplishment Jeno thinks. Arising from his throne, Jeno is quick to leave, though he has found new comfort in his position he still hates that room. Hates the eyes of those men.

“Your highness!” someone shouts out as Jeno makes his way down the hall.

“His Grace, Renjun” Mark whispers close to Jeno

“What do I owe this pleasure?” Jeno says as he turns to face him.

“We are to travel to our country seat that sits along Dream Pier, I am told you stayed often as a child. Do join us” He invites Jeno. “It is rather a secluded area so I’ve been told, if you worry about Helios, I do doubt they would attack a place with no much attraction.”

The King is an attraction.” Mark states his tone so blunt Jeno finds it hard to hide his laugh.

“You are correct” Renjun lets out an awkward laugh as though to release some tension. “However the capital is a much more dangerous place My Grace.  We are also hosting for the General and her lady, so I do hope you consider Sire.”

“Mark gather who you deem fit to travel with us” Jeno turns to Mark and then to Renjun “I gladly accept your invitation.”

"My wife will be happy to hear it" he smiles, and they proceed to walk down the rest of the hallway.

"Your first summit, am I correct? How did you find it." Jeno starts up a conversation.

"In all honesty My Grace, fucking terrifying" they both spill out into laughter and just as Jeno's laughter is about to subside he spots Mark's face in a state of shock and he can read his thoughts as if they were said aloud.

"Mark next time you should accompany me"

"Sire why scar him" Renjun turns to Mark, hand on his shoulder "the nobles grow horns and fangs, the General's eyes glow red and they all hold their fists tight." Renjun laughs. "Not to mention the mumbling that will drive any man mad" and at that Jeno nods his head aggressively in agreement Renjun then speaks of trivial things such as sport and stocks until he's walked Jeno to his chambers, they speak like old friends until he bids him farewell.

It's only after the presence of Renjun has completely vanished that Jeno sends Mark with another note for you. Mark finds you with Fei , in the previous King’s office, clearing and organising files.

“______, i was searching for you” Mark runs into the room

“Your quest is over, how can I be of help Mark?” You ask head down as you flick through the pile of paperwork.

“I have something for you” he walks over to the desk that's center of the room, big and grand. Thousands of papers occupy it, all which need sorting for the arrival of the new King. He places the neatly folded note on top of the pile before you, your eyes briefly going to it before going back to reading the parchment between your fingers.

“What is it the two of you are doing anyway?” He asks as he looks between you and Fei .

“Tell me Mark, what does it look like?” Fei rolls her eyes

“It looks like you are not doing much Fei '' He scoffs as he looks her way. Her feet rested on the table, she sits on a large chair, papers sprawled on her lap as she flicks through them. Her head whips up, eyes turned into slits and Mark mimics her expression before sticking his tongue out, earning himself a paper ball to the head. He lets out a large groan as he rubs the point of impact, causing Fei to fall back in laughter, papers slipping as her head is thrown back. Her laughter cuts off as Mark throws one back, this goes on for a while, both throwing paper balls at one another until Mark falls on a tall stack of paper and that’s when you decide you’ve had enough.

“Can the two of you get any more irritating?” you sigh, getting on your knees to gather all the fallen paper

“I’m not too sure, what do you say Mark can we tempt ______’s anger anymore?”

“Most definitely” He nods his head “However I don’t think it’s too wise.” He smiles your way, as innocent as possible as your jaw is tight and eyebrows furrowed. “You appear displeased ______” He giggles as he nudges Fei .

“Mark how about you help us clear the paperwork.” You suggest, his laughter seized instantly.

“Yes, do join us” Fei says, turning to him, always one to change sides quickly.

“I believe I do not wish to stay but I wish you well,” He says, quickly heading out through the door with a wave.

Fei too joins you on the floor, separating the scattered papers into piles. There’s silence for the majority of the time, carefully you both read over the faded or the blotchy ink, occasionally broken by the loud groans of Fei as she stretched her limbs or to ask what this word says or the other's opinion on whether this was important enough to keep.

“______” she calls, you answer in a hum, head still down until she is aggressively shaking you by your shoulders. “______, look” her voice falls into a whisper as she shoves the paper into your hands, her eyes looking towards the door to see if anyone is walking past.  Your eyes skim fast over the words again and again, eyes widening each time. “show his majesty” she whisper shouts

“I will” you whisper back, folding the paper back and slipping into your pocket.

“When do you see him next?” Fei asks, looking back towards the note that waits on the desk.

“I have yet to open it” you say back, continuing to stack up the loose papers.

"Be weary." Is all Fei says before the room falls silent once more, note long forgotten as you continue clearing through the papers.

“Be weary Sire” Jaemin consults Jeno as they sit round a large conference table. Jeno remembers this room, the room he wasn’t allowed to enter as a child, the room he watched, the age of thirteen standing in the corner observing, his father sending all men to a war, a war that still rages on today, nearly a decade later. Now, a decade later, Jeno sits in this room with the General under his command.

“I assure you Mark is only loyal to me” Jeno’s jaw tightens as Jaemin persistently insists for interrogation of the crown’s private secretary. “I will not hear of this”

“Sire, it is just a precaution.” Jaemin still tries to convince Jeno as best he can. “Turn your eyes upon this, please my lord if only for a moment.” He says as he places torn, discoloured parchment in front of Jeno. “I suppose you do not remember much, for you were all but five” he says as if they are not equal in age. “Your father, the great King before you, faced acts of treason similar to the terrorist attempts you are challenged with Sire. It was later discovered that it was your father’s own private secretary that betrayed him. He was executed, your majesty” Jaemin pulls out another piece of parchment, a death certificate. “Revenge runs through his kin”

Jeno knows of revenge, a drive that runs to the core of his bones, that aches raging and dull pain. It is persistent and forever present. It crawls under his skin and rots away his brain, his mind and thoughts being consumed.

“I trust Mark” Jeno says once more “Yet I understand your concern. Interrogation is not needed General but I promise to maintain some distance between us.” and with that the discussion is dismissed, Jaemin leaves with a sigh. Leaving Jeno to think, would Mark really betray him?

And as if the devil had heard, Mark appeared through the door “Sire” he called, “Your next council awaits you.”

“Allow them in.”

They all pile in, nobles from a variety of  different families all who own a substantial amount of land and their sons who come to observe as they study economics and business though they have no interest in the subject, just a formality as they inherit the estate. Jeno was amongst them last year, he would sit beside his father and hear of the prospers of the lands as each noble told tales of the prosperity the great goddess Tyche had blessed their lands with.

“Unemployment rates begin to rise Sire, due to the bombing of the port 127” Zhong Chenle tells on behalf of his father who is too old for travel. Chenle comes from a wealthy family, his family owning the largest port in NEO after his ancestors fought off the North during the first North-South war long before even the birth of Jeno’s great great grandfathers. “My father remains back in our district overseeing those who have been affected by the bombing, helping them relocate into other businesses, the general has suggested we introduce conscription of a few thousand men to help with unemployment rates. As well as this we introduced cartels for all major stores to ensure prices remain low.” He continues to speak on but Jeno’s mind wanders off.

Would Mark ever betray him? Was his friendship a lie? Was Mark raised to believe Jeno was his enemy? The questions run through Jeno’s mind spiriling into more questions causing his head to spin. He relives every moment, his life playing before him as he analyses all that Mark has done. Would Mark ever betray him?

"Sire" Chenle's voice is loud and his stare is worried, his lip upturned "Your opinion on conscription?" He says slowly, a tone that confirms this isn't his first time asking.

Jeno sits up, clearing his throat "What of the North?" He asks his voice carried with confidence yet confusion settles around all who sit beside him.

"What is it you mean my Lord?" Chenle questions in a shaky laugh.

"Who owns the land of the North?" Jeno answers back with another question

"You my Lord." Chenle states

"Then I should know of the economic stance of my land. Your father is the economic minister of our country, does he not know of half the country?" All turn to Chenle, who stutters to find an answer.

"Let us call it the end, come to me once your role in this court has been carried out." Jeno rises from his throne, heading out the door. Mark waiting outside as usual, Jeno can't help but think of his father. Of the betrayal he faced and he wondered would he face the same.

"A short summit?" Mark questions as he walks behind Jeno only hums in response. After all he did promise Jaemin he'd keep his distance.

Trust. A greater compliment to being loved, for to trust someone is to place your whole being within their hands. You may spend a lifetime building this trust but a second to crumble it down. Lee Jeno trusted all too easily, he did so to gain trust and support in return. Yet he failed to see how trust was just a concept built on threat. Lee Jeno trusted you too easily.

You pace the room back and forth, skin of your thumb trapped between your teeth, breaths hesitant, slightly you hold them back. “I should not have done this” you turn to a completely calm Fei, she leans against the pillar that holds the archway above your head. Her eyebrows furrow and her lips upturned, she rolls her eyes.

“Please inform me ______ as to why you allow your mind to dwell on decisions it has already made.” She yawns as she straightens  “You have aligned yourself with his majesty, you serve him and rightly so” she walks over, close to you ear and she whispers “You came to him, you chose your side. Don’t let your morals get to you now” Her voice sends chills down your spine, her words threatening every hair that stands. "For you will regret otherwise." She backs away but her words still linger around you, in the air and it crawls in your ear and they repeat themselves in your head until it rings.

Then the door creaks open, the man standing tall, the image burning her words in your mind. Huang Renjun stands and breathes as a living reminder of regret or was the unsettling feeling, your conscious.

You both bow instantly, as he steps into the room, waiting for his indication that you can stand. Unlike Jeno, Huang Renjun loves the surge of pride and power that pulses through his body as he stares down on all. Royal blood doesn't run through his veins so you accuse his need to validate his pride and self worth without hating him too much.

"Rise" his voice is quiet but authoritative and instantly you rise as fast as you bow, for patience was replaced by pride. Every moment within his presence your mind decides the wrenching feeling is regret, for what possibly would cause you to serve him. Then the dull ache of revenge burns a little brighter, the constant reminder making its presence known.

"We found the documents" Fei begins to tell. "You were right your highness, his mother indeed was attempting murder. The Queen Mother called for a divorce when Jeno was age 5, yet it being a dead end she turned to his brother to seek other means." at those words a sinister smile adorned his face, his eyes crinkled up and you too saw the vision he saw. The crown sitting upon his head.

"Well done" he praises

"All is left is to locate the documents that supposedly awaits in the house" you tell him as he rests his hand on his chin, pacing as you were earlier, nodding as he hears your words.

"Perfect" his smile beams as his plan falls into place, the puzzle pieces allocated now to only place them down. "Show Jeno both together, for there is no way he could deny you otherwise." To which you nod and bow down your head at his orders. "Keep him distracted  ______ and you shall be rewarded greatly."

"Don't let him distract you" Fei whispers for only you to hear, her jaw clenched, she speaks through her teeth and you resist the itching urge to roll your eyes.

"The attack Sire" you bring up hesitantly "the one in district 127, was it you or the Helios?" You ask for the wonder of another thorn in your side, floats in your mind.

"I suppose I never did warn you, that I apologise for." His words reassure you. "Expect another and let it be a sign that your King is I that stands before you."

The week seems to approach quickly but days drag on endlessly, and you wonder if it’s because your last awaits you. Every breathing second guilt hovers over you yet revenge eats you alive. The contrasting feelings of plummeting regret and the raging fire of anger both fight for the dominance of your mind and heart. Though you have given in to the red blaze it only strengthens the other, inner conflict forever waging in your mind. It’s especially at these moments when guilt gains a lead, when he simply just smiles.

Jeno climbs into his carriage, he smiles at something stupid Jisung said and waves him a goodbye. You can see the pink dust that decorates Jisung’s cheeks from here and you can’t help but smile too. For the younger adores the king and you wonder if this means you betray Jisung too and then you remember Mark and then the guilt has won the battle. For Mark is loyal to his crown, his majesty and friend; Jeno.

You look over towards Fei whose ear is being talked off by Mark, the sun has yet to even submerge from the horizon yet here he is as awake as midday. Fei’s face holds annoyance as she leans against one of the many stacks of hay, her eyes closed as her sleep has yet to leave her eyes but not once does she silence him or interrupt him. You supposed she likes hearing him ramble on about whatever excites him this early in the morning and you wonder if she too feels guilt.

“Let us depart now” Mark says loud enough for all to hear yet not loud enough to disrupt the sound of the birds that chirp and the spring wind that helps heave the sun up into the sky. All that have been rounded up climb into carriages to be taken to the Pier, a small team of servants hand picked by the King himself. For these are the few he trusts as Mark put it, only intensifying the guilt just that bit more.

“Dream Pier sounds nice” Jisung says excitedly, as he mounts onto the carriage

“If you like sweating, sure it is” Fei answers back, much less enthusiasm evident in her voice.

“Why do you always have to bring the mood down.” Jisung grunts in annoyance , his lips forming into a pout that makes you giggle slightly.

“Someone has to warn you” she shrugs as she too follows in right behind him “otherwise you’d complain that we did not mention the heat”

“Ah she’s got you there Jisung” you laugh as he rolls his eyes, mimicking her words as he pulls his face in all different expressions earning a solid punch to his arm. You laugh once again at their antics and you wonder if this will be a part of  life serving under Renjun, you hope it will be.

“______” Mark calls just as you are about to enter, “the king asks you to sit with him.”” Fei’s head sticks out the carriage instantly, her eyes widen and her ears perk up.

“An order or a request?” you asks

“The difference is?” he asks back

You let out a deep sigh “I suppose we shouldn’t keep the King waiting” you say walking towards his direction and stopping once you realise Mark is not trailing behind you. “Are you not coming?” you whine out, a carriage ride with Jeno and Mark would be sufferable but without Mark you know what conversations are to be held and you don’t think the guilt in you can resist feeding off of it.

“I’ll ride with them” he says as he steps in and seats himself in your former place.

“Have fun ______” Fei shouts out, laughing loudly until Mark places his hand over her mouth to silence her. You turn around to quickly join Jeno but not before you stick your middle finger proudly up at Fei but it only encourages her laughter more.

You climb into Jeno's carriage that awaits you in the middle of the long row, he sits there head against the side, his eyes closed. You think how easy it was for you to enter, how easy it was to gain his trust and how easy it would be to stab him in the back right here, right now.

“Oh you are here” his eyes open and he smiles slightly as you sit down opposite him.

“Why is Mark not riding with you?”

He doesn’t appear to be shocked by your words and you don’t expect him to, for no one else has ridden with Jeno other than Mark since he was a young child.

“I am told to be wary of him” Jeno answers, his words much more shocking. Eyes widening and eyebrows shooting up, you are left speechless. “It is why I requested you instead.”

“You believe this?” you ask still fazed by the words that left him moments ago

“Do I wound you?” He asks “You seem to have taken offence.” You scoff, out of everything he picks up on he chooses the tone you use with him.

“I just find it hard to believe Mark would be of any threat and yes you wound me as you do not believe the same” He trusts you, why does he not trust Mark?

“I want to believe it”

“What is stopping you?”

“This” he says as he pulls out stained parchment, the edges uneven and it’s rough against your palm as you take it from him.

“Who showed you this?” you ask as your eyes scan over the papers.

“The general. He told me of a sought rebellion led by an inside operation which so happened to involve Mark’s father, he was beheaded for treason.” Jeno tells you and that’s when it clicks. The General who worked for Renjun, they were using Mark as a scapegoat to lead Jeno’s suspicions away from them, his suspicions away from you. “This is a motive for revenge.” Jeno says and any man with a brain would say the same.

“I see” you choke out, it takes all you have to spit out those words, words so heavy as they sit on your tongue for the lies that you’ll spew are one to eat away at you. Guilt beginning to seep through you. For he is correct this is a motive for revenge but not for Mark. “You should be cautions Sire.”

“Will you look into it?” He asks

“Consider it done” you say with your eyes closed, maybe if you didn’t look at him it would be easier. You were taking his life from him. You’ll take his crown, his throne, his title and status and you’re taking his only friend but you suppose that is revenge. The rest of the ride stays silent but your mind is loud as the waging war of morals and desire still is underway.

The carriage halts to a stop, your body jerking slightly forward, you're quick to open your eyes, holding on tight to the seat to stop your body from jolting forward. The door opening and the smell of sea salt invades all your senses, lingering in your nose, stinging your eyes. The sun bounces on the horizon of the sea, the blue blinding as it glows gold.

The manor runs busy, as countless staff prepare for the arrival of the King. "All these people and still you bring us" you comment as you stand waiting for Jeno to climb down.

"We are in the lion's den ______, it would be foolish if I did not bring those I trust"

"You do not trust Mark" you remind him and he shouldn't trust you.

"I trust him more than I should," he says quietly as he sees Jisung come skipping your way.

"Dream Pier is marvellous your majesty, it is an honour to have accompanied you" Jisung beams as bright as the sun "though I have already been bitten my a bug" his smile slightly dims as he analyses the small red bump on his forearm

"Are you complaining already" Fei walks up behind him, Jisung flinches at the sound of her voice and instantly denies her accusation, shaking his head.  "Well you will be soon, the sun has yet to rise fully and it already feels at though we stand in a desert"

"You are the only one complaining" Jisung mumbles under his breath earning him a strong flick to the forehead but before Jisung can retaliate Mark calls out.

"My Grace, let us enter" Mark gestures towards the large entrance.

The manor sits on a grassy hill, overlooking the town below as well as the sea. It sits prettily by the coast but a grassy field barricades the exterior followed by stone walls that are built high. The sun illuminates it from behind, making details hard to see but the green vines that climb it are impossible to miss as the violet flowers bloom.

"My Lord, it is a pleasure to have you" Renjun extends his arms as he waits by the entrance for Jeno's arrival. "I hope it is just as you remember it"

"It has yet to change one bit" Jeno smiles before taking his hand to shake.

"My wife, her father and your mother await us in the dining hall, you must be famished My Lord, the travel is long." He allows Jeno to lead him through the halls and you all follow soon after. Your legs follow them unconsciously, your mind elsewhere, you think of the task ahead. To perform treason, to betray Jeno, to stab him in the back and to avenge your parents.

You walk past many rooms on your way to the hall but as you walk behind Renjun, his hands behind his back he points slightly towards one and just as you pass it you're aren't able to catch a glimpse as the room door is sealed shut.

"Your staff are free to join our own downstairs Sire" Renjun says as you close approach the hall, you see both the Princess, her father and Jeno’s mother already seated, waiting for the arrival of the King.

"Mark stays with me" and Renjun nods at his words.

"The rest of you are free to do as you please." Jeno orders before stepping into the hall, Renjun and Mark follow after and then the doors close.

"Let's head to the Pier" Jisung suggests and Fei groans instantly.

"Jisung it is boiling" she complains "the sun will grill me"

"The sun has yet to rise" he shakes her arm as he whines back "______, you'll accompany right?" Jisung says full of hope, his best smile on display.

"No," his smile drops instantly, "I would rather sleep Jisung." You yawn out "Fei has yet to deny you though, so have fun you two." You wave as you walk off  "Keep him occupied Fei" you smirk out and she rolls her eyes before being dragged by the arm.

You walk out of their sight, back the way you arrived, you head to the room that holds all answers. The corridors emptied, not a roaming soul yet you feel the peering eyes. The eyes in the walls, for you are sure Renjun has someone watching you, to ensure your rage still burns brighter than the inevitable guilt that trickles into your system. You are sure Fei has mentioned something, unlike Jeno she was never one to trust.

You arrive at the office, the door left ajar,  you find a key that sits in the lock. The room is dark, curtains drawn with only a single stream of sunlight illuminating the grand wooden desk that sits in the centre surrounded by walls that hold books from ceiling to floor. This is the room. This is where you'll find the last pieces of the puzzle.

It feels like hours as you scavenge through the endless papers and files stored here, documents written decades ago. You pass over agreements, marriage proposals, business alignments and wills. Your eyes tire as they read over every letter of every scripture. You find old pictures of the Royals, moments in time caught and held on to, you see Jeno splashing in the sea with his two cousins. There's a smile on their faces that looks foreign on them, you almost don't recognise him. You tear your eyes away from the picture as soon as guilt chases you.

Yet you finally catch on to the feeling you chase, the revenge that sits in your heart you find the letters you need, the puzzle pieces, to avenge those who have been wronged. You slip them into your gown, under the many layers they act as protection to conceal from others. A new wave of burning rage and revenge courses through you and you rush to place everything back to the way you found it but the increasingly loud footsteps approach fast. His voice echoes through the halls and you hear Jeno's uncle coming quick.

"Let me just retrieve my clubs," he says and your eyes instantly turn to them as they rest against the wall in the corner of the room.

"Why not let a servant, father" you hear Renjun request but their voices continue to grow closer. You quickly hide away any remaining documents that are left, placing them in the cabinets of the drawer, not caring for where they were originally placed as you leaped across the room to hide yourself behind the door.the clubs on the opposite end of the room you only hope their eyes don't travel towards you who seeks refuge behind the wooden door.

"Yes let someone else get it, we can head on over to the course" Jeno also tries to convince him.

"Why bother someone when it is just in my grasp, do not be entitled, my sons, we are more than capable of doing simple matters" he preaches as he pushes the door open, your body being backed up against the bookshelf. You hold your breath as he enters, the door slightly moves forward and you close your eyes at the thought of being revealed and suddenly it’s hard to swallow as something rises up your throat, your veins pulse and heart jumps in your chest, shaking your ribcage.

He walks towards the centre, he turns quickly in search for his clubs and you count every second it takes for his eyes to fall on them, for ten seconds has never felt longer and just when he's about to leave, he turns once more. His eyes landing in the centre, they turn to the desk and its then when you realise you have left the draw open, papers spewing out.

"Shit" you cry to yourself in your head, you don't dare risk making a sound for if he were to hear you it would be over before it even could start.

"Father" Renjun calls again and he turns instantly, he leaves without a second look, closing the door behind him. You can finally breathe. A deep sigh leaves you until you hear the turning of a key and the click of a lock. You were stuck.

"Fuck" you curse out as you shake the door handle for the nth time as you attempt in getting the door to open. You fall against the door and slide down until you've met the floor. You grunt as your mind runs circles trying to think of a way to escape, your hands run through your hair and you tug at the roots slightly, hoping the pain will simulate some ideas.

"Ugh come on" you hit the side of your head, desperate. Running your temples, you let out a deep exhale, your mind racing as every brain cell works to find a way out. It's then you feel the heat across your face, a blinding yellow burning behind your eyelids and they slightly sting and even more as you try to open them. The sun streams through, light breaking up into a million different colours as it refracts through the prism windows. Then in that moment, your head clears and instantly you rise to your feet, the answer being in front of you.

Unlatching the window, you push it as far as it’ll go, you hoist your legs over and just as you’re about to jump; you look down. “Not that high” you breathe out, trying to convince yourself. You close your eyes, heart racing, your palms begin to sweat and then you jump. The wind breaks through your hair, your heart leaps into your throat and adrenaline kicks into your system, every nerve on fire until you meet the floor. Your fall is softened by the awaiting bushes, though thorns dig into your arm and the branches scratch them, you breathe out alive. Basking in the lingering adrenaline, you fall back relieved.

Panic settles in Jeno's stomach as he worries whether if you have been locked away, evidence of his suspicions is obvious. He fears his uncle, more than a King should, more than a nephew should. He is a much more powerful man than Jeno cares to admit but that ignorance and pride will end with nothing but ruins for Jeno, so he sets them aside and proceeds with every caution. His mind runs wild as he thinks over and plays every scenario possible, he only has one thing on his mind. To get you out of there.

Yet his legs carry him somewhere else, he walks alongside Renjun and his uncle to the golf course. Clubs in hand, they all take their stance to swing into the open. One ball after another, Jeno's swings get faster and harder, yet gain speed but lose accuracy. Renjun is nothing but perfect, his posture, his angle and aim, he outshines all no matter what.

"Do you often play your majesty?" Renjun asks "My father and I play every Saturday" he tells him.

"I am more of an archer but it is no sport I am alien to." Renjun nods as his response as he aligns his club with the ball, pulling back before he swings forward with force. The sound crackles through the air as the club comes in contact with the ball and away it flies.

"Any word from the General as to when he shall arrive?" Jeno asks as he too sets up for the ball. Pulling back, he swings faster, knuckles whitening as he grips onto the handle.

"This evening perhaps. Her grace may arrive without him so my wife says." Renjun calls for another ball, a boy placing it down. He pulls back and swings and Jeno swears he saw sparks as it crackles, the ball flying across the sky. Renjun raises his hand to shield his eyes, trying to pinpoint where exactly his ball landed and once he has found it, he smiles to himself satisfied. "Shall we move to the next hole?" He asks but he moves on without any answer.

"I wonder Sire" he begins as he lines himself with the ball once more "what are your intentions for our great lands?" He asks swinging and perfectly the ball rolls to a hole in one.

"I plan to unite the South and North." Jeno announces loudly

"The great King Jeno, ending decades of conflict, he unites the clashing sides of NEO and rules them as one." Renjun acts out, his hands waving around "that is what the papers will say" he smiles. "Though do you think it is possible? Do you think the nobles will allow it? Do you think the North will just accept you as their rightful leader?" He continues to ask, no breath between them, he overwhelms Jeno with them.

"I will make it work" Jeno says, jaw slightly tightened but is he angry at Renjun or himself? Does he have the answers to his questions? Questions so important but isn't it simple? What a King says is what goes.

"Your turn your majesty" Renjun moves behind Jeno to allow him access. Jeno stands in line with the ball and just before he's about to swing, Renjun speaks up "is that not foolish? My Grace please do not take offence as I do not intend to wound you but even a king does not have complete control." He tells him

"Do you take me as a child Renjun?" Jeno asks as he swings, the ball rolling against the shortly cut grass, it swerves slightly before it plops into the hole. "I will make it work by doing everything in my power. I will give equality to my people, I will convince anyone I must and if needs be I will purge the court with those who are more inclined to negotiate."

"A hole in one, well done my grace" Renjun praises before he steps in front to take his turn once more, swinging once more but the ball doesn't roll straight in like it did before. Renjun takes the hole on from a new angle, realigning himself with the ball. "I offer you my luck my Lord" Renjun says before rolling the ball straight into the hole.

Jeno then swings for the ball, landing straight in, another hole in one. "It seems as though your luck has already been received" Jeno laughs out as he turns to Renjun.

"You use it so soon my Grace." Renjun says in response "My luck has given you the win but the next time I will guarantee it stays in my favour. I will win."

Picking the leaves out of your hair, you walk down the halls of the manor in hopes of finding anyone. The halls remain haunted, empty and not a single soul insight. Occasionally you would see a guard or two but that is all and for a place that is hosting a king it seems too less. Yet you think that is exactly what Renjun has planned, to allow the snakes in the castle walls to squirm around all too easily. He's made your job easier and you are grateful.

"______" Mark shouts, turning quickly you spot him jogging up to you.

"You've been dismissed?" You ask and he nods as he answers back

"His majesty is resting in his chambers" he tells you. "Have you seen Jisung and Fei?"

"They went to the Pier, I suppose they'll be back when called." You explain to him

"I'll go to them then and bring them back, the general is coming I hear" he tells you as he walks back the way he came and as soon as he's out of your sight, you too change your direction. The King's chambers, your new destination.

You knock on the door only once before he opens it, the guards are stationed nearby but not at the entrance like the castle, you suppose Jeno’s orders. The way he moves and his haste, he was expecting you and he’s also expecting others to walk by. You rush in, and make your way further into the room following him.

"You managed to find a way out" he laughs as he pulls out a leaf from behind your ear. "I suppose jumping out of window is one way"

"And you would suggest?" You stutter as you feel his presence that lies so close, you can feel the heat radiating off him.

"For you to wait for me, I would have retrieved you." He steps back, a smirk adorned on his lips.

"Frankly Sire, my only thought was not to get caught. Jumping out of windows an extreme I was much willing to take."

"You can rely on me ______, to get you out of tricky situations"  he tells you and you only bow your head in return. “So what is it you have found?”

You pull out the parchment that’s still neatly folded from under the many layers. “I suggest we sit down, your highness” you warn him and he raises an eyebrow as his interest increases but he listens and situates himself on the small bench that sits at the foot of the bed. You kneel before him, sitting down below him on the floor, you spread out the many papers you stole from Jeno’s uncle as well as papers you found whilst clearing the King’s office that you had bought along with you. Jeno’s eyes follow your every movement, he tries to read the parchment upside down but the smearing and faded ink is already hard to make out enough.

“It is true your uncle attempted to murder your father, your suspicions were correct” you begin and his eyes widen and you can see the water that threatens to overflow from his eyes, his heart hammering so loud in his chest, he feels the thumping in his head and hears the beating in his ears. His blood rushes so fast, he feels in flow past every cell and every nerve ending is lit on fire. Rage pulses through him and everything is tinted red and on instinct he jumps up, attempting to head for the door until you hold on to his wrist. He looks down at your, fire burning at his iris, he stares you down. “There’s more” you gulp as the guilt becomes hard to swallow.

Jeno sits back down and you take in a deep breath before you can carry on, you fight the guilt with the fact that this is all true and if anything you are doing what he requested you to do. You ignore what is to come next. “Your mother was in on the attempt” and in that moment anger and rage dissipate and only despair cripples him, aching through him. He falls onto his knees in front of you, shaking his head continuously he mutters something incoherent, his eyes wide and unfocused.

“It is a lie” he chokes out as he grabs you by both arms, grips tight enough to bruise them “tell me it is a lie” he shakes you as if it would make the words fall out of your mouth. His grip gets impossibly tighter and the pain becomes almost unbearable, tears clouding your eyes. “Tell me it is a lie” he cries out, his head falling and his grip loosens as he grows weak. His tears roll down and you feel them drop onto your skirt, hear a few splatter down onto the floor.

“It is true Sire” you stutter trying to speak around the knot stuck in your throat and you lift up the document Fei found that day you cleared through the office. He snatches it from your eyes, examining the paper again and again, he reads it again and again until his mind can no longer deny what his eyes see. A letter proposing the assination of of Jeno’s father, a proposal suggested by his mother to his father. The two closest people to Jeno, everyone his father trusted, turning their back on him. How could Jeno trust his mother, if his father himself couldn’t?

“Yet sire, these letters are dated years ago” you remind him as he hangs his head low and if your words are meant to bring him any comfort, they do not. “Your father died naturally your majesty, there was no evidence to say otherwise so let us assume he passed peacefully”. These words only cause another wave of shaking and tears course through his body and Jeno thinks the life his father lived was one so painful, the betrayal of a lover and his brother, he only prays he passed peacefully. His head rests in his hands and he weeps into them, bent over his legs, the king cries in front of you. Every part of his body aching with grief he shakes again and again and the immeasurable amount of guilt you feel is eating you up. You place your hand on his shoulder, trying to offer some comfort, you hold onto him and just like the day on the balcony he falls onto your lap, retreating into your warmth for comfort. To make the aching stop, to stop his heart from crying, to stop the tears that continuously run down his face.

His breathing remains ragged, his eyes remain swollen as tears dry up and his head still lies in your arms, they’re wrapped around his neck as you pat his back, humming to comfort him. He’s distressed and confused, his mind in chaos as he thinks back at every living moment that was painted as a lie but he lifts his head up and it’s now you both realise how close you are to one another. His lips only centimetres away, his hot breath fans across your lips and you gulp. His eyes stuck on them, he can’t move, he must not be thinking right. He must have gone insane, you think. Yet he inches closer until the gap between you is no more, his lips crashing on yours. He kisses with force, lips pushing against yours and they move in a hurry and messily as his teeth clash against yours as you both move your lips in sync. He kisses you until he’s stolen all the oxygen from your lungs, until he’s set you ablaze and until he has you weak for him. His tongue pushing its way into your mouth, he fights for dominance everywhere he enters and you give it to him and as soon as you do he pulls back, lower lips pulled with him as his teeth drag it back.

(***) Your mind froggy as his lips continue, his tongue dragging down your jaw and then to your neck he places wet open mouthed kisses. Maybe it’s the lack of oxygen that your lungs heave to regain that has caused you to not be thinking straight but you never tell Jeno to stop even when he hesitates and looks up at you, asking for permission. He presses himself into the crook of your neck, marking dark bruises that have breathy moans escaping the back of your throat.

“Your highness” you let out in a moan and Jeno groans at the sound as his tongue swipes across your collarbone, “are you certain about this?” you ask.

Jeno stops and he faces you, his lips so close to yours you feel brush past yours. “I am. Are you not?” he asks

“I am” and with your  confirmation he continues. Unbuttoning your blouse, he kisses down the valley between your breasts. He pushes you down, against the marble floor, your bare back against the cold, you arch it towards him as he wraps his lips around your nipple. His free hand attends to the other as he sucks and his tongue circles around the aroused bud.  Your mouth hangs loosely, jaw slacked, and you can’t help the string of moans and profanities that leave you and they only encourage Jeno as he makes his way further down. Tongue sweeping across your abdomen he makes his way down, ridding you of your skirt, he’s finally facing your dripping core. You’re soaking, he swipes his tongue against his bottom lip before going down. Kissing your thighs, he teases, his breath fanning where you need him most and when he hears you soft whines he only giggles.

“Keep your legs open” he orders and before you can even answer, he’s lapping at your folds. He picks up all the glistening arousal that seeps out, yet you only become more wet, your hole dripping with more and Jeno’s tongue attempts to pick up every last drop. Your back bends and your hips grind down on him unconsciously. Jeno brings euphoria to you, the king now on his knees , he serves you. His lips wrap around your clit, sucking away at it until he has you screaming.

“Fuck” you shout but then all air is knocked out of your lungs as his tongue circles the rim of your hole. “Stop teasing Sire” you beg and with that he plunges it in, pulling a symphony of moans from you and he too can’t help but moan into your core. The vibrations sending you into overdrive and the familiar knot in your stomach comes undone, your body shaking from the ecstasy . Then he pulls away, snatching your high away from you, his lips glisten and he smirks your way as you cry out from what has been stolen.

“Sire please” you beg, desperate to have him where you need him, any part of him. Just as you open your mouth to speak once more you’re silenced by two of his fingers ramming into you. They move at a godly speed, bringing back the high you so crave.

“Fuck you are beautiful” he says against your core and you shiver at each brush of his lips to your clit and then his tongue pokes out doing wonders, circling your clit, he has your hips bucking up for more. He holds you down, iron grip surely going to leave bruises, you shake until finally coming undone. He pumps his fingers to help you ride out your orgasm and once your breathing becomes more regular he pulls them out, licking up his fingers, he collects all your juices before entirely sucking his fingers.

You take in the godly sight in front of you but it’s then when your eyes are now focused on Jeno and not being rolled into the back of your head that you realise he is still fully dressed whilst you lie before him, completely naked. So you take matters in your own hands, whilst lifting yourself up you pull him by the collar to meet you halfway. Pulling him in for a messy and passionate kiss, you taste yourself on his lips and then even more as his tongue delves into your mouth. Your hands are quick to rid him of his shirt, working the way down to each button and then he himself throws it over his head. You instantly reach for his chest, feeling him down to his abs your fingertips flutter over them as you deepen the kiss. Lungs burning and lips turning numb but you can’t pull away, for Lee Jeno is far too addicting. So you drag your lips against his jaw, allowing you both to breathe but still allowing your lips to stay on the hot skin that sends electric sparks through yours. You mark up his skin, decorating it with the blooming red that will soon turn to purple, down his neck and torso. Once you reach the band of his trousers, you push them down and with Jeno's help you get him out.

"On your knees" Jeno says as he rises up and you obey, sitting yourself on your knees. The cold marble floor causes them to ache but at this moment you really couldn't care any less. He strokes his length a few times, hand pumping at the already hard and proud standing dick. The tip, an angry red leaking precum and you can't help but lick your lips in anticipation. When he's ready he taps on your chin indicating for you to open and you comply instantly. Jaw slacking completely, you stick your tongue out ready for him.

With no hesitation, Jeno rams his dick straight into your throat. His hands find purchase in your hair, he holds tightly by the roots and forms a makeshift ponytail, using it to move your head in time with his rhythmic thrusts. You hollow your cheeks and relax your throat, tongue swirling around him at any chance you get. As the tears form in your eyes as Jeno replaces all oxygen in your system, you hold onto his thighs, nail digging into the back but the pain only stimulates more pleasure.

Your throat is raw as he continues to thrust deep inside, pushing your head down until he feels your throat completely engulf him. Swallowing around him, Jeno lets out a deep groan as his head drops back; his eyes rolling back as far as they can. Your core aching your hands go straight to your clit to create some friction and just as you feel the urge to gag, he pulls out, his hand going to your cheek to wipe away the stray tear you hadn't even noticed. He pulls you once more into a kiss, mumbling against your lips but the words so quiet compared to the blood that rushes through you and the erratic heartbeat banging against your chest.

"Turn around" he whispers into your ear, placing sweet kisses just below. He helps you into the position he desires, your back against his chest, he has you on your knees once more. His tip teases you as it circles around your still dripping core.

"Please" you beg and breathless it comes out as you still try to retrieve your breath.

he mumbles against you, lips brushing against the shell of your ear as he talks "say it again" he pushes a little further into you.

Moans leaving you as he slowly fills you up "please" you beg once more and he pushes just a little further.

"Again, louder" he orders, kissing down your neck and arms round your waist he holds you up.

"Please Sire" you cry out, and at your begs he rams the rest of himself inside of you. Buried deep inside, bottoming out, he doesn't move until you beg once more. "Please" your voice is faint and horse but he still gives you what you ask for.

His pace starting at a godly speed, he thrust impossibly deeper into you. Your back arching and your jaw hanging loose as a continuous string of moans leave you, only causes Jeno to join you in a harmony of moans, grunts and groans. Your head resting on his shoulder, you give him full access to your neck once more, his lips immediately placing soft kisses. His hands on your breasts, he rolls your nipple between his thumb and finger as his other travels to your clit, overestimating you .

You cry his name and he yours as if it's all you know. You join as one as your breaths become the same, ragged heaviness and you feel his heart beating behind you as well as your own, you begin to lose the differentiation. Pleasure overriding your system, your mind becomes froggy as you feel another orgasm reach you. Your thighs are shaking and if it wasn't for the strength of Jeno holding you up, your legs would have given way long ago. You moan out his name as you come undone and he thrusts harder into you, riding out your orgasm and chasing his own. Moments after his hips stutter, thrusts becoming sloppier, he pulls out unloading onto himself and you.

You both fall back onto the silk sheets of the bed, Jeno assisting you on after he had cleaned you with a wet towel. You both lie apart, the only sound your breathing is trying to recover with unbearable silence. (***)

Jeno doesn't say anything as he gets up to redress. He picks up the scattered clothes placing them where he lied early and begins to dress. You don’t say anything, you don't even look his way as he buttons up his shirt. You hear him shuffle around but you just lie there, unable to look him in the eyes, worried if you turn to him you’ll crumble. Guilt rising quickly and the seconds pass excruciatingly slow, you close your eyes tight, praying he’ll leave before it all becomes too much. Yet when he leaves, the door closes behind him gently so as to not disturb you, the guilt doesn’t subside at all and that’s when you decide you too need to pay someone a visit.

As soon as Jeno steps out the door, he lets out a deep breath, the tension that built up fizzling out and the weight lifted off his shoulders. His head falls back onto the door as he thinks back, something else he’ll have to confront sooner or later but as for now later if the answer, he decides as he pushes himself off the door.

He makes his way down the hall, two guards following him and as he passes more, he orders them to follow too. Soon he has a collection yet he enters without them, pulling open the large doors, he makes his way into the room unannounced and there she is. The sight of her makes his blood boil, his fist clench and his heart ache once again.

His mother sits by the window, book in her hand, she stares down but her head snaps up as soon as Jeno nears closer. His presence burning with fury, she can feel it though the many feet that distances them. His eyes glow red and the blood so clearly pumping through his veins as the more prominent they get and his jaw tightened.

“What is the matter?” she asks as she places the book down on the table before her.

Jeno doesn’t answer, instead he places the parchment in front of her. She reaches for it instantly, her eyes scanning over the first few words and she freezes. Her body stilling as all air leaves her lungs, Jeno watches as colour drains from her and she just blinks at the paper in her hand.

“Where did you find this?” she manages to stutter out

“That is irrelevant,” Jeno speaks between his teeth, jaw still locked tight. “The question is, what the fuck is this?” he spits out. She’s taken back by his words but Jeno has lost all respect for her, he’s lost her trust in her.

“Jeno, listen my dear-” she flinches, cut off by the sound of a thousand shards scattering across the floor as Jeno throws over the vase of flowers that stood in the middle of the table. Jeno’s hands in his hair, he pulls at the roots. His mother reaches forward to try to comfort him but he’s quick to move back

“Do not touch me,” he snaps at her, eyes bloodshot red but no tears fall for he is blinded by anger.

“Jeno I did not murder him, I promise,” she cries out and he scoffs in disbelief of the words that had just left her mouth.

“No, you just attempted to,” he laughs out like a mad man. Hair tousled, breathing heavy as he constantly bites away at his bottom lip, drawing blood.

“Jeno I was miserable.” she tells him “A divorce was out of the question-” she’s cut off again, another smash of glass thrown against the wall and she ducks in her chair, as he throws yet another vase on the other side of the room.

“So you result in attempting murder?” he pants, his chest heaving. “And not only do you betray him, you involve his brother too” he screams at her.

“Yet I did not go through with it for you, I knew your uncle would not abdicate the throne once you were of age for the throne” She pleads for him to show some mercy. “I lived in misery for you”

He laughs at her words “do not tell me to be grateful, do not try to say this was for my benefit when this only causes problems now” he screams. “You were miserable and now you make me miserable” his voice is hoarse and the veins running up his neck pulse as he speaks. Jeno throws his head back and sighs as his chest feels lighter, his eyes are glossy but he refuses to cry once more, he refuses to allow his anger to engulf him. He hears the shouting of his uncle and his mother rushes to the window, panic evident in her eyes.  

“Please Jeno” she begs

“Guards” he calls for softly and they run in with a hurry, holding both his mother’s arms behind her back. She screams and she cries, she begs him to think this through, begs for forgiveness but Jeno blocks out her cries for this was hard enough. He doesn’t look as they take her away and he doesn’t look as she is handcuffed, he doesn’t watch as she’s driven away.

As soon as you hear the door click shut, you come out from under the silk sheet, dressing quickly before Jeno returns. You too head out of the room, tension still so thick even without his presence and once you step out you feel your shoulders lighten, your head clear and you let out a deep sigh.

You walk down the halls, heading towards your final destination and then finally all of this can be put to rest and you will have no more involvement in Renjun's schemes. You knock on his door softly, as if you don't want him to hear and that this could all be avoided but he does. The door swings open and he steps aside to let you in.

"I have fulfilled my orders" you tell him soon followed by shouts and guards running past the room before Renjun could close the door behind you.

"I see you have" Renjun smiles as if he's been given the world, so bright and it stretches across his face. "Well done, ______" he walks past you and sits on a chair that faces the window, he separates the blinds and stares out as he speaks. "I doubted you but clearly you proved me wrong, you'll be rewarded greatly when I ascend to the throne" he tells you "how does revenge feel?" He asks, a smirk adorning his lips.

Revenge. The word sits blank in your mind, not having meaning anymore for now that you have had revenge, what are you left with?  There was no satisfaction that came with it, no joy or peace. Only anxiousness, guilt and regret. Did Jeno deserve something he didn't cause just because his family did? Did Jeno deserve to lose everything? For his search for revenge had now left him alone. It takes his mother, his uncle and it doesn't bring back his father. It doesn't bring back your family either. Soon Jeno will lose his title and crown and you'll lose Mark and Jisung. So how does revenge feel, you wonder.

"Great" you say softly to Renjun, putting on the best smile you possibly could

"I'm relieved" he says as his smile only grows impossibly more. "I need you for one more thing however" and your heart sinks slightly as his words that proceed to leave him.

You make your way out of his room once you have been dismissed, you breathe out the last of your facade and the guilt comes pouring in. Renjun wants to break Jeno completely, he hasn't and will not show any mercy. Your gut clenches, your throat closing in on itself, you feel sick. Holding onto your stomach, you kneel down trying to contain and subside the feeling of your stomach in your throat.

A hand is gently placed on  your shoulder and just by her presence you're aware who it is. Fei's grip firms as she helps pick you up. "Are you not feeling well?" She asks though her voice holds little to no concern, you're used to it. She already knows what your next orders are, you don't even have to assume, it is most definite. You can see the way her eyes glare at you, how her words hold subliminal threat. She asks if you are okay yet not your wellbeing but if you are okay with your orders. If you will carry them out and if you are not a threat.

"I'm fine" your reply is blunt and expressionless. For hiding the guilt grows too difficult to even act pleased. You shrug her hand off your shoulder and if Fei thinks anything of it, she doesn't say.

"We are to return to the castle" she informs you and your head snaps back at her, eyes wide

"Why?" You ask

"King's orders" she shrugs "must have to do with the arrests I'm certain." And you only nod as you hold your bottom lip hostage, biting away at the skin and kept hostage even as you walk down the halls. The sun now sunk into the horizon, the moon hovered above all, the trees swayed as the wind blew through them. The world is serene and yet you hold chaos. Revenge winning over guilt but guilt is the one that remains, it's the only one present.

You pray Jeno doesn't call you into his carriage but your paths are intertwined and the moment Mark comes up to you, you know the words that are going to leave his mouth. "Sire asks for you" he tells you. You only nod in response making your way over to Jeno's carriage, Fei's pointed look not going unnoticed, her eyes burning into the back of your head even as Mark rambles on to her. You arrive at the carriage, climbing in, Jeno sits shaking. Yet he rests, calm with his eyes closed. You wonder if this has brought any peace to him or if revenge has only left him feeling empty as well.

You aren’t sure if he’s heard you arrive or if he even acknowledges your presence as he keeps his eyes closed but as the carriage moves and he makes no sign to, you suppose he knows of you being there. You sit in silence watching the scenery change, distracted by the long river that runs along your path, you watch the constant stream, ripples and tides. Jeno stirs a little and you turn to see his eyes open.

“You are awake”

“I was never asleep” his answer is short and the carriage becomes stuffy and it’s hard to breathe. The air is stiff and silence is deafening, you clear your throat to somehow fill it. Jeno just stares at you and you wonder if you should say something, words forming in your mind but never on your tongue.

“What happened between us” Jeno’s words cut through your train of thought and your head snaps up towards him, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. “It meant nothing,” he tells you.

You just blink at him until you realise he is waiting for a response “It meant nothing” you repeat back to him, assuring him that there were no feelings involved from your end. No feelings of attraction, that is for certain. Jeno visibly unstiffens and lets out a deep breath, the tension slightly relives and you go back to staring out the window. Yet Jeno is not done talking, it seems now that he has overcome the hard part but you still have to face yours.

“Thank you” and as those words leave his mouth, you realise you are facing it now, guilt overflowing you’re surprised you’ve managed to contain it. You don’t respond, you don’t even show any indication that you’ve heard but he doesn’t repeat himself and the rest of the ride to the castle the carriage remains silent.

As you near the castle the lump in your throat forms again, it’s hard to swallow but you thank it for making it impossible to speak. Your palms begin to sweat and your stomach turns and your heart is pounding in your mind. Your blood rushes through you and you hear it in your ears, every nerve ending lit on fire as the adrenaline hits in. Yet when the carriage comes to halt so does the rest of the world, it all falls away and suddenly you can’t hear the birds that chirp or the people that shout out orders, you can’t hear Jeno’s breathing or even see him. Everything goes white and you only hear your heart beating louder and louder, for this was the moment.

You step out quickly after Jeno and instantly sirens blare through your ears, Jaemin walks into view and this was the beginning of your final orders. After this it would be over. Jeno looks around confused, grey smoke streaks through the dark blue sky and a raging red paints the night as if the sun still hangs in the sky.

“Another terrorist attack, Sire” Jaemin shouts as he runs up to the both of you, “Helios are here” there's worry in his voice and Jeno freezes in fear. “I have to escort you somewhere safe” Jaemin grabs onto his arm and pulls him through towards the castle. “The bunker is designed for emergencies like this” Jaemin tells Jeno, to reassure him of his plan but his words fail to stay in Jeno’s head as once again he is crippled by fear.

“What about ______?” Jeno asks

“Who?” Jaemin’s eyebrows furrow as he still pulls Jeno along, making sure he keeps up with him “The bunker is only for royalty your majesty”

“Yes I am aware but they were with me” Jeno turns back to see if you still stand there or if you too were running along behind them but he can’t make out the faces through the smog nor the wave of soldiers running through the courtyard.

“That is not of my concern, you are my only priority” Jaemin yanks at Jeno’s arms, grip tightening as he pulls him into the bunker. “Please wait here your majesty as I bring others as well as round up the soldiers, you will be safe here” and with that Jaemin leaves Jeno in a room where no one can enter and he can’t escape.

Jeno doesn’t know how long he waits before he hears the door click open but he knows it was long enough to drive a man insane, for he was pacing up and down wondering who the next person to walk through that door would be. Would it be Lee Haechan, head of Helios? Would it be General Na? Whoever it was, they were here now and Jeno could hear his heart beating against his chest, his rib cage rattling. Yet the figure that steps in is not one he expects. Huang Renjun walks in tall and proud, a smile is adorned on his face but it only adds more to Jeno’s fear and confusion.

“Renjun, what are you doing here?” Jeno asks

“No your majesty, what are you doing here?” Renjun smirks at the confused expression that still paints Jeno’s face. “Why are you locked in a cell”

“Helios have arrived” Jeno is quickly cut off by Renjun

“No they are not” His voice is more stern now but the smile never once falters  “This was devised Jeno” Renjun laughs.

“What do you mean?” Jeno asks, throat going dry.

Renjun laughs louder, head thrown back, it echoes through the room and sends chills through Jeno “I mean” he nears closer to the cell “whilst you were playing detective on a case solved years ago, on a murder that never existed. I turned every single minister against you and those who still sided with you I killed. Helios was never a threat, I had turned your General against you and now they all work for me.” he smiles as he watches Jeno fall to his knees, eyes wide, he cannot believe the words he hears. “Yes bow to your King” he smiles down at him

Jeno’s heart stops, his breath caught in his throat, he cannot speak nor think. He closes his eyes and tells himself this is just another nightmare and that Mark would wake him up as he always did. That the curtains will be drawn and the sun will flood in causing his eyes to sting but it never comes. The only stinging of his eyes come from the uncontrollable tear that rolls down his cheek. Renjun crouches down to get a better look at Jeno who shook at every wave of fear passed through him, his blood running cold and all colour draining from him. Renjun smiles at the sight, “I hope you enjoyed the wild hunt I sent you on” he whispers low, his voice making its way into Jeno’s mind the words linger.

“What do you mean you sent me on?” Jeno’s head snaps up

“Oh Jeno, you are flawed in many ways. You are weak, indecisive, unconfident and soft but the worst of your traits is you trust far too easily.” Renjun stands and Jeno has to strain his neck to see him, “______” Renjun calls and Jeno’s head begins to spin.

You step into the room, eyes on the floor for you cannot stand to look at Jeno but Renjun will only see it as a sign of respect to him. You don’t need to be looking at Renjun to know he is smiling, you can feel it, you can hear it as he speaks.

“You see Jeno, not everyone within these walls is your ally. Your father made enemies when he didn’t serve justice. He blamed his servants for the attacks that took place more than a decade ago, he did it to protect his wife and brother.” Renjun tells Jeno

“You are lying” Jeno shouts out, almost choking on the tears that run down his face

“Your father killed hers” Renjun shouts louder “by blaming them then he has made them take action now, against his son. Your father was a fool Jeno. You just as much of one.”

You wince at every sound of his uneven breathing, the heaving of his chest and the groans of denial as everything is revealed. You feel guilt but the more Renjun speaks of what Jeno’s father had taken away from five year old you, the more bearable it becomes. “Thank you ______, for keeping him occupied, you followed your orders well.” and you bow to him like you would once to Jeno. You feel his eyes burning into you from below, you are sure he curses you a million times over but when you dare to look at him you don’t see the raging fury he always held in his eyes. The fire had been put out and Jeno was left broken. The man who once held the world in his hands, the crown on his head and all riches a man could ask for.

Now on his knees is a man. And there before him, is your king.

© (jisungiest) 2021. All Rights Reserved.

#neowritingsnet #nct-writers #neothestars #nctcreations #czennet #Jeno #lee jeno #nct jeno #NCT #nct dream #nct fic #nct angst #jeno x reader #jeno angst #jeno smut #jeno x y/n #nct smut #nct dream smut #loml jeno #king's crown #ascention to the throne

[encorrectenha]

Hi! This is really random, but I was taking a test and listening to music through earbuds when you posted your recent quotes. Siri started reading the notifications about your posts cause I forgot to turn on do not disturb, and at first I was like “Yay incorrect quotes!” but then it started reading your posts and next thing you know the words “OiLy LoNdOn” and “JaY wHy PeE oPpAr” were being said really loudly into my ears, and my face legit went from 😄 to 😐 in less than second—

And it didn’t even stop Siri kept going and read every single notification 😭 I couldn’t even turn it off cause if I was on my phone it would’ve looked like I was cheating or smth

But like, how DARE oily london and jay why pee oppar interrupt Nillili Mambo (that song is such a BOP)

The audacity 😤

Anyways I thought I’d share cause I found it funny but in all seriousness I love your account <3

Lmaooo I'm so sorry Jay Why Pee oppar and Oily London interrupted you while you were listening to Nillili Mambo😭😭 this made me laugh so hard though lol

[batarangsoundsdumb]

hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .

if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation

Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh

this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.

Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 

i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho

speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible

tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 

Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏

how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???

'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 

about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.

you are the only funny person on this hellsite

how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.

Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)

check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)

dick grayson but he's nicki minaj

his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 

Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol

you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link

...

why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.

Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery

ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.

i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD

THANK YOU

bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.

people tend to do it in the bathtub.

WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns

i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think

lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.

if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk

i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.

saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3

literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.

I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.

fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)

It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece

OH my god dude lmao

there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more

it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )

i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)

shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.

Wait, hear me out

Bernothy @redlightofdawn

great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname

Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?

Wait no, I regret sending that ask

these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.

crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-

WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY

Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol

she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.

Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god

lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.

Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like

send to me or lose a toe

🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋

thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/

⬆️

This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.

Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 

fanksss also lmao.

That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but

There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?

oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.

"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure

yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.

I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!

haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.

Doot doot!

noot noot

I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me

lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.

sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"

lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 

(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”

yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.

so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side

i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’

ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.

wow. the IMPACT.

Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝

this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.

Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.

May I ask where your username originates from?

yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.

yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim

no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 

How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited

fenomenal next question.

Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that

(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)

i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts

You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel

you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.

Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 

he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.

Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.

lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy

stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

oh yes it is my darling.

did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily

no he did it bc fuck the french.

im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist

okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.

your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue

i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.

suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩

sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.

Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit

yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW

Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics

clark reads smut confirmeeed

NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector

that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.

One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy

literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.

superfam and batfam associations??

-batman and superman

-dick/barabara and supergirl?

-conner and tim

-jon and damian

pls enlighten me I am confused

nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl

I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)

sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.

good human what are your pronouns?

wouldn’t you like to know?

I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes

everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont

don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily

dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants

Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.

damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo

Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨

stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!

All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 

batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.

I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this

vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.

seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go

emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet

People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.

dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME

dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet

all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise

bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves

thoughts on teen titans and young justice

haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!

ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them

log off tumblr?

Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc

huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.

I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something

fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.

lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 

unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right

why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf

idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)

There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.

all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you

is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa

no. find her as owa owa as you want.

aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:

1. tim

2. Steph

3. dick

4. Duke

5. the rest

you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED

oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs

i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.

dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.

super random but

jason 🤝 damian

old english

lmao fair enough.

tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.

yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.

I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.

i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.

so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?

no. dunkin donuts all the way

One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker

now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.

crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown

SO CRAZY HUH?

batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink

absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.

unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator

dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.

When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution

bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.

#literally if you got through this i just respect you #this is mainly just for the people who sent me an ask in the past few mask #i hope your ask is in here :) #sorry for everybody else #ask #bataranswers #this took me 4 hours to do so i hope youre happy #also sidenote #does anybody know the latin translation for 'to become' #bc i just used future of 'esse' but it could be a different verb #who cares tho latin is a dead language #big congratulations to everyone who translates my sentence #here's a bonus sentence: tuam matrem futueram

[emsvegetables]

“helloo can i request pretty setter squad "hey shawty yo mans still around" prank? thanksss”

OMG OFC THANK YOU ANON THIS WAS SUPER FUN TO DO!!!!!

Akaashi:

* you’re just chilling on the couch watching some netflix, and Akaashi is reading quietly beside you, with his hands gently carding through your hair.

* then you decide, HEY, why not try that tiktok challenge that’s going around????

* so you shift away from Akaashi, who raises his eyebrows but smiles at you as he watches you get comfortable at the other side of the couch, and he returns to reading the book quietly.

* then he hears the face time tone.

* he’s like?????

* he’s eyes are narrowed and he’s tilting his head slightly at you, but he doesn’t say anything and he returns to reading the book.

* then he hears it.

* “hey shawty, yo man’s still around?”

* he’s instantly sitting up and putting the book aside, and then he’s LUNGING at you for your phone.

* he’s actually really protective over you!!!!!

* so he’s glaring down at the screen, and he’s saying,” don’t you say that to (Y/N) again.”

* but then he realises its his face staring back at him?!!!

* he’s so confused.

* he’ll look at you with his eyes widened, and he’ll pass the phone back to you.

* “Keiji it was a prank.”

* “oh.”

* he’s still confused, but he laughs along with you when you show him the video and show him his reaction!!!!!

* you pay for it that night in bed LMAOOO

Oikawa:

* okay he’s probably practicing his serves, and you’re sitting on the bench and just vibing.

* it’s after practice and everyone has already went home.

* you’re just literally mindlessly scrolling through tiktok LOL.

* you get sick of him not showing you attention for a while, and you decide, LETS DO THAT TIKTOK CHALLENGE!!!!

* so you giggle to yourself as you play the face time audio, and you watch Oikawa’s face, previously scrunched up in concentration, turn into befuddlement.

* but he still continues to throw the ball up, and jumps to hit it, when—

* “hey shawty, yo man’s still around?”

* the ball flies up to the second floor LOLOLOLOLOL

* then he’s running over to you, and his eyebrows are furrowed and he looks so angry!!!!

* “WHO WAS THAT???????”

* he’s making grabby-hands towards your phone, and when he sees his face staring back at him, he realises its that CHALLENGE HE SAW THE OTHER DAY FIROFIFIDKFIE

* he feels so stupid.

* you laugh at him, and he pulls you into a hug.

* “hey! Tooru, you’re sweaty!!!!!!!”

* “YOU DESERVE IT (Y/N)!!!!!”

* he’s rubbing his sweat all over you that you have to change into his extra set of clothing cause it stinks.

* and when you’re changing...something happens ;) ;)

Kageyama:

* LMAOOO he’s probably practicing his serves too.

* literally everyone in the volleyball team already went home, and Hinata wasn’t there to spike with Kageyama’s sets bc he had to go home to take care of Natsu.

* so you’re literally sitting on the bench, and you’re mindlessly scrolling through tiktok.

* then you see IT. THE PRANK!!!!

* lmaooo Kageyama hears the face time tone chime from your phone, but he literally does not care because he’s too focused on doing a proper jump serve.

* then he hears it.

* “hey shawty, yo man’s still around?”

* he’s literally dropping the ball and running HINATA STYLE to you.

* “who was that, (Y/N)???????”

* he’s asking you, and he’s breathing heavily bc WHO DARED TO SAY THAT!!!!!!!!!! which man tried to make a move on his DEAR????

* he’s making grabby-hands at your phone (lmaoooo like senior like junior), and when you tell him it’s a prank, he’s so confused.

* “b-but i heard a voice.”

* “that’s part of the audio, Tobio.”

* “oh.”

* he still doesn’t get it, but when you really explain it to him on the way home, he’s pinning you up against the lamppost and kissing you.

* “don’t do that again, (Y/N).”

Sugawara:

* THIS SMILING ANGEL.

* tbh you’re probably having a study date with him when you decide to screw with him.

* like...you’re bored out of your mind and he won’t stop going through some stupid trigonometry.

* SO YOU DECIDED: let’s do it!!!!!

* you’re pushing back the chair and scrolling through your phone to look for there audio.

* “focus, (Y/N).” he’s tapping your chair slightly while he’s still writing down some shit on trigonometry.

* then he hears the face time tone come from your phone, and he’s looking at you with just ONE raised brow.

* he’s like mf what r u doing? we r supposed to be studying.

* then he hears it.

* “hey shawty, yo man’s still around?”

* he instantly drops his pen down on the table and is trying to wrestle with you to get your phone out of your hand.

* “HEY MAN (Y/N) IS MINE!!!!” he’s yelling into the phone, and he blinks when he sees his own face staring back at him.

* when you tell him it’s a prank, he’s smiling widely at you, and you know you SCREWED UP when he reaches his fingers towards your stomach...

* and he tickles the life out of you.

* YOU LAUGHED UNTIL YOU CRIED.

Kenma:

* he’s probably gaming LOLOLOLOLOL

* you’re just resting on his bed while he’s gaming on his computer.

* tbh you know well enough not to disturb him when he’s gaming, but there are times where he allows you to...disturb👀...him during his gaming sessions, so you decided, why not test your luck today!

* as much as he’s hooked onto his computer, he leaves out one side of the headphone so he’ll know if you need him for anything!!!!! you’re his girlfriend, why wouldn’t he pay attention to you?

* so when he hears the face time tone echo in the room, he’s mildly curious, and he tosses you a quick glance before continuing to tap on the keyboard.

* but then he hears it.

* “hey shawty, yo man’s still around?”

* WTF?????

* he’s instantly pressing pause on the game and swirling his chair to face you.

* “who’s that, (Y/N)?” he’s asking calmly, but his eyes are narrowed.

* when you tell him it’s a prank, he gives off a small laugh when he sees the video, and then he rolls his eyes and turns back to finish the game.

* when he’s done, he’s going to make sure you never pull that on him again ;) ;).

hope this was okay, anon!!!!! :D

#kenma x reader #kageyama x reader #oikawa x reader #akaashi x reader #sugawara x reader #haikyuu hcs #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu hc #haikyuu headcanon #kageyama tobio x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #akaashi keiji x reader #kenma kozume x reader

[writing-for-me-at-this-point]

Jade and Floyd when they want to summon Moth Mc: Mothra's song

Moth Mc: *pops up into Mostró lounge* You called?

Azul: *disturbed but intrigued*

LMAOOO

The twins just get bored and decide to play it so MC shows up! Azul can't even say anything cause at this point MC stays for hours and will buy drinks and snacks to ease his kind too

#moth mc #moth au #answered #queen.ans #monster au

[simp-4-kylo]

can i get a softie!kylo ren x reader? the reader got back from a dangerous mission (he couldn't go with) and almost gets killed by a saber. while at med bay kylo rushes in and crawls in bed with her. lots of fluff. softie supreme leader!!

Can’t lose you 

Warnings/tags: softie!Kylo, mentions of war/fighting, blood, injured reader, mentions of needles, fluff, uhh Kylo Ren is nice (in this one), lmaooo

Word Count: 1,264

A/N: I am slowly making my rounds to the requests, trust me they’re all in the works!!! I actually really love the idea of the reader getting hurt and Kylo being all soft. I lowkey want to make a discord server where we as star wars fans/adam fans can just vibe together. Also, I’m totally not writing this in the middle of english class #SorryNotSorry haha. (also I have def used that gif before-)

The rush of cold air from the docking bay rushed into the shuttle causing each wound to slightly burn. The smell of burnt skin and clothes filled your nose, it couldn’t quite leave. That sickening smell mixed with the smell of cleaner and oli. The docking bay was jammed packed with shuttles landing from the recent mission, people working on different tie-fighters, prisoners being brought in, crates being loaded into ships to be sent off. 

Lights flashing by as two medics rushed you down what seemed to be the longest hallway on the Finalizer. The bed that you were laying on proceeded to get soak with blood and dirt. Your eyes grew heavier by the second and you couldn’t keep them open much longer, you heard a muffled voice say “Mrs. Ren, keep your eyes open for…” Then the world went black.

Sweat dripped down Kylo’s back and soaked his training clothes. He released a muffled grunt as he drew back his saber and swung it towards his Knights. He managed to push two of his knights back, he sliced through the air doing flips and tricks, it was an art that he was still mastering. He raised his crackling red saber above his head and blocked a hit, he released a deep grunt and pushed with all his force and grazed the shoulder of his knight. 

“Excuse me Supreme Leader, I was sent to-” A younger officer had come through the doors of the training room, looking quite small and out of place. A skinny male who was visibly shaking. Kylo had cut him off and said “What? What is so important that you come into my training room and disturb me while I am training with my knights. What could possibly be that important”. He ended his sentence with a click of his saber and clipped the hilt to his side. 

“I’m sorry sir, but uh. It’s uh- the recent mission Mrs. Ren was on- well they’re back.” The young officer said, looking around the training room, he was once again cut off by Kylo. “Then get out of my way so I can go see her, you are wasting my time.” Kylo said and he brushed past the officer, but before Kylo could get all the way out the door the officer turned around and said “she’s in the medical wing, she was injured during battle.” The smaller man was staring at the floor when he said this. He was waiting for Kylo to ignite his lightsaber and cut off his head, after a few seconds of pure horror, the guard looked up and Kylo was no longer standing there. 

Kylo made his way through the halls of the Finalilzer, he knew he should have made you stay with him on board the ship. It was his damn fault that you were now in the medical wing, stars know what is going to happen to you. He tried to steer his thoughts in a good direction, it was extremely hard when he could feel life slowly drain from you. You’re ability with the force wasn’t as strong as Kylo’s, it was something the two of you had always been working at. Any storm trooper that came between you and Kylo moved to the very edge of the hall, they lowered their heads out of respect.

The sound of heavy stomping boots grew louder as you slowly opened your eyes and the feeling of anger and vulnerability washed over you. You tried to open your eyes all the way but the bright lights were too much. Laying there in the long bed, with your eyes half open and half closed you heard the door open. You tried to lift your head to see who had just entered the room but you couldn’t, you slightly moved up in the bed while doing so, releasing a grunt. 

You waited for someone to start speaking to you, but you never heard any words. The only noise that filled the room was the heart monitor attached to you and distorted breathing coming from the end of the hospital bed. Finally you were able to open your eyes all the way, you reached up to rub them a couple times when you heard the figure in front of you clear their throat, which made you remove your hands from your face. 

As your world started to become clearer, you had realized that the tall figure at the end of your bed was Kylo. You had wondered how he got here since he was in the middle of training and was he going to be mad at you? You tried your best on the mission and honestly you couldn’t let Kylo down especially on your first mission without him leading. He had put so much faith in you, trained you for weeks, told you everything that needed to happen. He even asked if you felt better if one of the knights came along, but you had declined. You knew you were strong enough to do this without any help.  

“I knew something was going to go wrong on that mission.” Kylo had said after he reached up to remove his helmet. You just stared at him, you were afraid he was going to yell and be angry. “I”m sorry Kylo, I know you trusted me to complete this mission and I tried my best. I really did. It all happened so fast, I’m not even sure wha-.” He had cut you off mid sentence and replied “Hush. I’m not mad at you, I’m mad at the storm troopers for not notifying me sooner of your injuries. They had failed to inform me on your way back.” he said as he walked around the bed and came to kneel beside you.

“Kylo I really did try. I tried and I remembered everything you had told me to do. I guess I’m just not strong enough, I know I can get better I promise you. I won’t fail again. I’ll train everyday.” You said as tears filled your eyes, all you had wanted to do was impress him but instead you had failed him and ended up in the med bay. 

“You already impress me. The fact that you had wanted to go on a mission and lead it by yourself shows your strength. Things happen and I couldn’t be more proud of you for wanting to become stronger. All I wanted is for you to be okay and you know that I will always help you train. I want you to believe in yourself and know that you are so very strong.” He had said as he leaned forward and rested his head on the bed and held your hand. 

You had just stared at him and your heart swelled with love, this was the soft side of Kylo Ren that the universe didn’t know existed. This version of him was only reserved for you. “Come here Kylo, come lay with me.” you had said. He lifted his head off the hospital bed and looked you in the eyes and smiled. He stood up and rounded the other side of the bed, he sat down and leaned down to take off his boots. 

Once he had removed his boots, he crawled into the bed with you. Him being huge, you ended up laying on him. With your head resting on his chest, you felt him trace the saber wound that was bandaged on your side. You fell asleep to the sound of his beating heart. The heart that was reserved for you.

#kylo ren #kylo ren imagine #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x y/n #kylo x you #star wars x you #Soft Kylo #Ren loves you #jbwrites #kylo ren fluff #Kylo is softies #I swear im writing more #Star Wars #Request

[scoups4lyfe]

Hi! I just read in one of your post that you watched Lupinranger. So , I wanted to ask who was your favourite there? Also do you have any other favourite sentai shows ?

LupINRANGER?

well well well hELLO to you TOO anon <33.

hahahaha thAT is such a loaded question....my favorite .....

I made a sh*tty graph for visual lMAO

I feel like all the lupins are unrankable. I just like them that much.

But, but, but-

I noticed Umika first tho cause she's so f*king cUTE. And then I noticed Touma cause he's a trash gremlin; and then Keiichiro and Kairi because of their just....everything.The angst. The Relationship. The dRAMA-

Tsukasa....is not my type but I appreciate her <333. (From daY 1. Homegirl gotta deal with them other two + o lA lA so, double appreciation from me LOL. )

Honestly the writing of Lupinranger just really shined for me?

I started J and Nacho on Lupinranger (after we were just finishing Build lmaooo), all three of us really laugh everytime a flashback scene pops in cause "Man, Banjo Ryuga WISHES he had character developing flashbacks liKE THIS-"

LOL

and hMMM me and Sentai are a tricky pair because I tune in aT the WEIRDEST of times lmaoOO. (Like watching Zyuohger as it aired...)

Here's a pic I have saved to my favorites on my old-ass phone for some reason:

....I don't know why this is saved to my favorites.

And it's like I go around sampling each of the Sentai Seasons as if I snuck into some kind of high-class wine tasting party (hahaha even the showa ones <333.) but then I have a hard time sticking through to the end.

The amount of times I've tried to speedrun Super Sentai from the beginning (showa) to present.....is frankly disturbing. LOL

Ones that I really do go feral over though:

*Timeranger >:))))

(Idk that show is so easy to watch? Delicious 24.7/10. Finally some good fking food.)

....I have not finished watching timeranger tho, hahaha but I've watched the first 20 episodes like 5 times by now.

After Timeranger,,,, hmmm,, probably Gokaiger (which I also didn't finish <33). Then ToQger, which I *DID* finish and loved <333. Hmmmmmmmm my mind is blanking rn, but I've also finished Dekaranger and I like that one as well.

Generally, I vibe with every sentai show; but I know it's a favorite when I add it to the watchlist (Toku) lineup I have planned for Nacho and J. (After Lupinranger --> KR 000s ---> IDk either Kuuga or Timeranger.)

and so on and so on. Idk I've been sneaking into these Sentai-Wine-Sampler-Parties for a long time now. I've probably watched at least a few episodes of almost every season.

#right my tokusatsu timeline is....interesting to say the least #growing up on power rangers really do be a gateway to all other tokusatsu lmaoooo #so funny I still remember seeing that PR Samurai had a japanese counterpart and being like #*squints* ....hELLO??? #Don't ask me why I was watching PR samurai yES I was old enough to #know better #lOl #So I guess Shinkenger was my first sentai lol #Damn how long ago was that? #It was obv not airing cause y'kno PR always gotta be like 2 years late LOL #wow feb 2011 #even FUNNIER is how I accidently discovered Kamen Rider #again through zyuohger #they had that ghost cameo epsiode and I was like #'WOAH WHAT IS tHAT???' #its been history ever since smh #super sentai #my thougts #kaitou sentai lupinranger vs keisatsu sentai patranger #lupinranger #mirai sentai timeranger #zyuohger #Sentai scouped

[padme-parker]

Keep On Loving You [AU!Anakin Skywalker x Reader]

Summary: After breaking up with Anakin nearly 5 years ago, you see him again.

Word Count: 6.1k+

Warnings: um angst, mentions of pregnancy and abortion, Anakin is an asshole in this one, fluff if you squint

A/N: This is a song fic, so listen to the cover of “Keep On Loving You” by Cigarettes After Sex while reading this! 

Also, I was never gonna post this but I wanna supply ya’ll with content while I try (and horribly fail) to write ch 3 of Collide. Fun Fact: This was actually THE first fic I ever wrote and completed (so don’t have high expectations lmaooo)

Walking into the grocery store, you noticed it was more crowded than usual. It was odd, you thought, no one ever really comes to your local grocer. You brushed it off, continuing your shopping. Although you shopped here often, the workers rarely changed where the items were located. You had already familiarized yourself with the baking aisle, so imagine your surprise when you realized the flour was now on the top shelf. You tried to grab it by hopping, but that didn’t work out. As you started to climb the shelves, a hand reached out and grabbed it for you.

“Thank you!” You replied cheerfully. You hadn’t even had the chance to turn around before you heard a quiet, “No problem.” Your body had tensed up. You could recognize that voice anywhere, it didn’t matter that five years had already gone by.

“Ani?” You turned slowly, hoping your ears weren’t deceiving you.

“Y/N?” The warmth had left your face, you tried to blink back the tears. The air had left your body, suddenly you couldn’t remember how to breathe. “Hey, Anakin.” You said with a faint smile

“My god! It is you Y/N. How are you?” You were surprised he had even remembered you.

“I’m good, just buying some stuff for myself.” you replied.

“Flour? I don’t recall you being into baking when we were together..”

“Oh, yeah. It’s something I..uh.. Picked up on after you left. I was just actually getting some ingredients for some cookies. What about you, how are you doing?” You told him, you couldn’t bear to look him in the eyes, so you chose to admire the floor instead.

“I’m doing pretty good, I would go into full details but I don’t want to disturb you.” He said, “Actually, how about we go grab a cup of coffee?” After he said that, you lifted your head to look at him. He must’ve thought the face you made was funny because the corner of his lips started to quirk up.

“Yeah, okay. Let me just pay for this and we can go. Same place?” Anakin simply nodded his head, and with that you were off.

-

You let out a loud laugh, amused by one of Anakin’s stories. It felt like everything was right. As if the two of you never broke up, just like the old times. You wrapped your hands around the warm drink, trying to warm up your hands.

“So why are you back in New York, Anakin? I thought you were in Los Angeles for your acting career.” You paused, unsure what to say next.. “Congrats by the way, I know how much it means to you.” Although it hurt to say it, you were truly proud of his accomplishments. You turned to look at him and for the first time, you admired his appearance. His hair had gotten longer and his eyes were brighter now.

“About that, I’m here for my wedding!” For the second time today, the air left your body. You felt as though the world around you was now crumbling to pieces. It might’ve been five years, but you could never be able to stop loving Anakin.

“W-wow, really? Who’s the lucky lady?” You asked, you tried to keep your emotions in check. Now was not the time to cry.

“Her name is Padme, she’s an actress, just like me. It’s funny, we were both working on the same movie, our characters were in love with each other but I could’ve sworn she hated me. Well one thing led to another and now we’re going to get married.” A grin made its way onto Anakin’s face, “What about you Y/N, find anyone special?”

You hesitated before speaking, “No not really, I’ve been busy with work, taking care of my dogs and-” The shrill tone of Anakin’s phone cut you off, “Hold on, Padme’s calling..” He then proceeded to answer, giving you a sheepish look. You could faintly hear her on the phone, she had been panicking which caused Anakin to swiftly tidy up, “Okay, okay Padme, calm down, I’ll be there soon.” He gave you an apologetic look before getting up. “Do you.. Um… perhaps wanna go? To the wedding?” He asked you.

“Me? Ani, you want me to go?” You were curious, the two of you hadn’t spoken for almost five years, why in the world would Anakin want you there?

“Of course I do Y/N/N, how could I not?” You swallowed the lump in your throat before nodding. In return, a bright smile was given. “Great, I’ll send an invitation to your address” you quickly corrected him, “Actually, Anakin, I don’t live there anymore.” He let out a quick oh in response. Getting out a pen from your purse, you wrote down your address on a napkin before handing it to him.

He took a brief glance at it before shoving it in his pocket, “See you tonight?” You were caught off guard, “W-what?” you asked.

“To give you the invitation I mean.” He replied

You let out the breath you were holding, “Oh yeah, I guess I’ll see you tonight.” He gave you a swift nod accompanied by a smirk, and then he was gone.

-

By the time night came, you had completely forgotten that Anakin was going to stop by, too engrossed with the cookies you were baking. You were just about to take out the cookies when the bell rang. With a curse, you threw down the rag and ran to the door. Hastily opening the door, you were greeted by Anakin.

“Hey, thanks for coming by. It really means a lot to me, Anakin” You told him

“It really is no big deal y/n, and it would mean a lot to me if you came to my wedding.” Anakin then pulled an invitation out, “The wedding is on Saturday, the ceremony starts at 3pm.” Given that it was Tuesday, you had three days to find a suitable outfit. Or just rummage through your closet and find whatever was good enough.

“Look, I would invite you in Anakin, but I’m currently busy. Sorry” Your eyebrows were raised and gave him a shrug, “Gotta go, my cookies are gonna burn!” You shut the door on him before he could respond. You pressed your back against the door and took a deep breath to compose yourself before going back to your cookies. Seeing that your cookies were about to be burned, you quickly took them out.

“Who was at the door?” Asked your roommate

“HOLY SHIT! What the hell, Steve. Are you a ninja now?” You whisper screamed, taking a quick glance at him only to realize he was nearly naked, “And why in the world are you almost naked Steve?”

“It doesn’t matter. Oooh, are those cookies?” Before you could reply he grabbed one and shoved the hot cookie in his mouth. “So are you gonna tell me who that was?”

“No one, just a-- it was nobody.” you say, trying to sound convincing. Steve then gave you a pointed look, indicating that he would wait all night for the truth if he had to. Giving in, you told him who he was. “That was..he’s..” your eyes begin to tear up, “Anakin, it was him. He was just inviting me to his wedding.” It seems like all you did now was cry. You didn’t understand why you were crying, it’s been five years. You should be over him by now.

“Anakin, as in Anakin Skywalker the-” you cut him off, “Yes, that’s him.” The tears were coming out of you like a river now. He let out a soft sigh before taking you in his embrace, he knew what had happened between you and Anakin.

You had been waiting all night for Anakin to come home. You knew that he was close to landing a lead role, so you had wanted to prepare a nice dinner for his efforts along with sharing some good news of your own. Just as you pulled the chicken out of the oven, the front door opened. Anakin set down his stuff with a sigh, coming up behind you to wrap his arms around you.

For a moment, you let yourself get lost in his embrace. You enjoyed the warmth he emitted, snuggling closer to him. Anakin was the first person you had ever truly loved. No one could ever compare to him.

“So, how’d it go Ani?” Expecting another rejection, you turned to cup his face. However you were proved wrong when a smile lit up the room. “I got it baby! I did it!” He screamed, lifting you up and placing kisses on your face. You screamed along with him, you were happy that he was finally being recognized for his talent.

“Anakin, that’s amazing!” You were jumping with joy, “I made roast chicken, let's discuss over dinner.” You began to plate the chicken along with the honey roasted carrots and potatoes. Anakin set up the plates and cutlery, getting two wine glasses and your favorite bottle of wine. Once you saw that he finished setting up, you put the chicken and sides down on the table. Taking out a knife, you cut out a piece of breast meat for him. You were quite excited for this meal, you tried a new recipe, resulting in the chicken looking juicy and flavorful. You then served yourself before sitting down. Anakin reached for the bottle of wine, pouring himself a glass first before reaching over to grab yours.

“Actually, Ani, I think I’ll stick with water tonight.” He gave you a questioning look, “I’m quite parched, and although I’d love a glass right now, water seems like the only thing that can quench my thirst. Thank you though.” He got up to get you a glass of water before returning to his seat.

“So, tell me about it Ani.” You started the conversation

“Well y/n/n, everything about it was great. After auditioning I was sure I wasn’t going to get a call back, but they did baby! They called me and wanted to discuss the role with me.” He continued, “We have to start filming soon but..” He paused

“But what, Ani?” you implored

“I’m going to be gone for a long time y/n, in Los Angeles…” that surprised you, he was supposed to be gone in LA while you were in NYC, “How long Anakin?” you asked, afraid of his answer.

“Almost a year, my flight leaves tomorrow at 4:35pm” you froze, how were you supposed… what if… you couldn’t think, so many thoughts and questions were running through your mind.

“Ani, you’re going to spend a whole year in Los Angeles..away from me.”

“Y/n, it doesn’t have to be that way.” He reassured you, “You can come with me, we can still be together.” He must have been joking, there was no way you were going to leave. “Anakin, you know I can’t! Everything that I’ve built for my career is here!”

“If you come with me, we can rebuild our future together. Nothing will stop us, we won’t have anything to worry about. Imagine it, you and I, walking down the red carpet together. Hand in hand.” You were appalled, was that all he really cared about? The fame and fortune?

“You can’t be serious right now, Anakin! Is that all you care about? The money and fame that comes with being an actor? We both know that the world doesn’t give two shits about people like us!” You screamed, your chest was heaving now.

“People like us? What do you even mean by that? Are you insinuating that I’ll never be successful?” By now his eyes were wide open, gone was the supposed celebratory night.

“No- Anakin you’re putting words into my mouth, I-” “THEN WHAT Y/N? WHAT COULD YOU POSSIBLY MEAN?” You took a deep breath before opening your mouth, “Ani, all I’m saying is that the people don’t care about nobodies, and they never will.”

“But that’s the thing y/n, everyone starts as a nobody, yet the only person who can change that is yourself. I’m sorry but I can’t be with someone who doesn’t believe in me.” His eyes glistened with tears, he sniffled quietly, “I’ll come back for my stuff tomorrow before I leave, but I can’t stay here tonight.” The awkward squeaking of his chair broke you out of your trance, you watched as he put on his jacket and collected his keys. Just as he was walking out the door he paused, “You know y/n, I would’ve gone anywhere in the world for you. I just wished you’d done the same for me.” He said before softly closing the door.

You got up from your seat and walked towards your bedroom. Sitting down on the bed, you let out a defeated sigh. You scanned the room, only now noticing how much of it was filled with Anakin’s things. His scent still lingered in the air. You didn’t realise you were crying until you felt a tear drop onto your hands. You wiped away the tears before reaching under your side of the bed and taking out a box. Gently grasping the picture, you took it out of the box before starting to cry again, “It was supposed to be us together, forever.”

“So what’re going to do y/n? Are you actually going to his wedding?” Steve questioned you. In response you gave him a shrug. You knew it was wrong of you to go, but Anakin had personally invited you himself. Even though the two of you hadn’t talked to each other for half of a decade, he was still someone you cared about. Hell, you and Anakin grew up together as best friends, you had to be there for him. It was the least you could do. “Yeah, I’m going, Steve.”

-

The day of the wedding, you woke up nervous. Who wouldn't be, the ex you’re still madly and deeply in love with was going to get married to someone that wasn’t you. You called out for Steve but got no reply. You let out a sigh before getting up to get your phone to text him.

You: Hey, wya?

Steve: Good Morning y/n, I’m currently out. I won’t be home until later today, sorry bug :((

You: What! I was relying on you to watch my kids

Steve: I know, I know, sowwy. Maybe you can text the babysitter?

You left Steve on read to quickly text your babysitter.

You: JAR JAR!

JJ: Yo, wassup. What can I do for you today? 

You: Can you take care of my precious children today? Pretty please!!!

JJ: Of course I can, I’d love to.

You: Great thanks JJ! Please be here before 2:05pm :)

You were grateful that you had Jar Jar on days like this, while you hadn’t spent much time with him, you trusted him enough with your kids. Hopping into the shower, you washed your hair and body, letting the warm water and steam unwind you a little. By the time you were done showering it had been 11:35am, leaving a couple hours to get ready and maybe have a little snack.

Walking over to your closet, you pulled out a satin champagne dress. It had a low cut, showing a little cleavage. The fabric on the left side of your hip wrapped around your body, coming back up to where it started, giving you a slight slit. Then you moved onto makeup, deciding on going for a simple look. After applying your foundation, concealer, and contour, you moved onto the upper half of your face. You carefully filled in your brows, making sure each swipe was precise. Taking a spoolie, you blended the brow product ensuring that your brows weren’t so harsh looking. Next, you took your favorite mascara and applied it to your lashes. While there was some volume, you decided to put on some eyelashes so your eyes didn’t look so naked compared to the rest of your face. You moved onto blush and highlight, deciding on whatever complimented your skin. For the finishing touch, you chose a mauve-nude lipstick along with a glittery lipgloss. As for hair, you slicked it back, putting it into a nice tight low bun. By the time you were finished, the clock was at 1:25pm. It took you nearly two hours to get ready, but you still had time to accessorize and grab a snack.

You grabbed the first gold necklace you could find and put it on, along with a pair of dangly earrings. The house was quiet, so you assumed that the dogs were still asleep or taking a nap. Creeping into the kitchen, you settled on having a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a cup of yogurt for breakfast. Something quick and easy, it would keep you sustained until the eating portion of the wedding. If you had to be real, that was the one thing you were looking forward to. I mean who doesn’t love free food? After cleaning up, you went back to your room taking a quick second to check up on the sleeping beast on your bed. Seeing as it was still asleep, you went to the closet and pulled out a jacket along with strappy gold heels. It was nearing 2pm so you picked up your purse and made sure you had everything you needed. Makeup? Check. Phone? Check. Keys? Check. Invitation? Check. You walked into the bathroom and checked yourself out one last time. As you were heading towards the door, the doorbell rang, signaling Jar Jar’s arrival. You went to open it and invited him in.

“Alright Jar Jar, I’ve gotta run. You know where the food is if they get hungry, they’ve been napping for a while now so they might wake up soon, you know the drill.” You told him

“Yeah, yeah. I’ve got this under control. I’ve done this like a hundred times, duh.” He announced, you smiled at him. He never failed to lift your mood with his sarcastic and goofy attitude. You gave him one last nod before grabbing your keys out of your purse to lock the door.

Hopping into your car, you typed the address into your phone and started the journey to the venue. It took about 25 minutes to get there, you arrived at 2:30, giving you some time to find parking and a seat at the ceremony. The event was pretty big, given that both Anakin and Padme were famous, there had been many guests. You chose a seat in the middle of all the chairs, not too close yet not too far. You looked around, trying to spot anyone you knew but you couldn’t find anyone. Just as you were about to go on your phone to pass the time you felt someone sit awfully close to you. You looked up realizing who it was.

“Anakin!” You were surprised, shouldn’t he be up at the front? “Why’re sitting next to me? Aren’t you supposed to be at the front?” You took a glance at him, noticing how well his tux fit him.

“Well yeah, but I’m nervous y/n/n..” he replied. “What, why? Isn’t this supposed to be the happiest day of your life..?” you asked, you were starting to have second thoughts, maybe you shouldn’t have come after all. “I guess… listen I gotta go now, but you’ll be at the reception yeah?” you nodded, then he got up and walked away.

Before you knew it, music was starting to play but no one walked in yet, signalling that they were going to begin shortly. You took the time to admire the venue, there was a light lace fabric spanning from wall to wall, acting as a backdrop. The venue itself was a beautiful, dark brick building. Strewn around the room were fairy lights, making the atmosphere warmer. At the ends of every row were lanterns, containing light pink rocks and a burning candle. Across the aisle laid a white runway, each side having flower petals scattered, but left a clear path for the bridal party to walk down.

The doors swiftly opened and the music changed pace, one by one the bridal party began to walk down the aisle until the only person left was the bride. Each bridesmaid wore a different style of dress that complimented their style, but the color remained the same. Noticing that everyone was standing up, you stood up too, straightening out your dress. The orchestra played Canon in D, a wedding classic. Turning to Padme, you first took in her beauty. Her hair was curled to perfection, tied back only leaving a few hairs to frame her face. Her features were soft and angelic looking, you really couldn’t tell if she was wearing makeup or not. Your eyes drifted to her dress, it was truly magnificent. It was white with ivory detailing, her flowy sleeves made of lace. It was as if she was an angel sent from the heavens. You continued to admire her, then your eyes fell to her swollen belly, one hand clasped over it while the other was holding her bouquet. You were shocked to the core, Anakin really didn’t love you anymore, did he? Of course, you weren’t a silly girl, you knew that he was going to move on from you, but you hadn’t expected this.

Just as Padme took Anakin’s hand, you flopped down into your chair. The remainder of the guests sat down too, commencing the ceremony.

“Friends and family, we are joined here today to celebrate the wedding of Padmé Amidala and Anakin Skywalker.” Hold on, wait a second. Was that Obi Wan? Your whole body perked up, looking for the strawberry blonde. You were surprised that they chose Obi Wan to be their officiant. Given the fact that they’re both famous, you’d assume they’d have an actual priest at their wedding. To ya’know, keep up their reputation and appeal to their audience. 

You should've seen by the look in my eyes, that there was something missing.

“Marriage is a pathway to a promise between two beings. That they will always love and trust each other. Creating a bond that can never be broken. So I’ll ask this now before we continue. If anyone objects to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace.” For a minute, the world around you stopped. All you could see was him, your Anakin. His eyes met your gaze, as if it was a silent plea.

Tearing your eyes away from him, you sunk into your seat. Oh gods, why did you just have to go to the store while Anakin was in town. All of this could’ve been avoided if you had just gone shopping on Monday, but who the hell goes grocery shopping on a Monday?

“Alright, now that we have that out of the way, let's allow the bride and groom to share a few words.” Obi Wan handed the microphone to Anakin.

You should've known by the tone of my voice, but you didn't listen.

“You know Padme, never in a million years did I think I’d be getting married.” ouch, “Let alone to the girl of my dreams.” wow, it seems like Anakin was trying to make you more miserable than you already were. “So it’s so amazing that I’m standing here today, with you. Within the five years I’ve known you, three of them consisting of us being together, I’ve come to know what type of person you are. Padme is selfless, loving, and strong-willed. After our first movie together, I just knew that I had to have her. Every time I’d ask you out on a date, you’d laugh and say ‘Ask me tomorrow, Anakin’” cue the laughing, “so that’s what I did. Finally when you said yes, I felt like I was going to explode with excitement. After our first date, I just knew that I would love you forever, Padme.”

‘Cause it was us baby way before them.

The sun was softly shining through your curtains, you felt a hand brushing through your hair. Letting out a soft groan, the hand stopped, “Oh, please don’t stop on my account, Ani.” You looked up at him, a smile forming on his lips, “Good morning, angel.” You gave him a quick peck before saying good morning back, getting up to get ready for the day.

“So what’s the plan for today, Anakin?” You asked from the bathroom, picking up your toothbrush you applied tooth paste then proceeded to brush your teeth. Anakin’s arms suddenly wrapped around your torso, his chin resting on your head. “How about you go treat yourself, go shopping, maybe hang out with some friends, and when you come home, I’ll have dinner ready. How does that sound?” You pondered for a minute before nodding your head.

By the time you had arrived home, it was already 6:50pm. Unlocking the door, a delicious smell wafted from the kitchen. First you took off your shoes, leaving them by the door. Next came your jacket, hanging it on the coat rack. You snuck up behind Anakin, wrapping your arms around his neck. You could say sneaky snuggles were a daily thing in your relationship. “Whatcha cookin good lookin?” Anakin let out a snort, “Only the best for my girlfriend. How about you go sit down while I bring the food to the table.” You turned to the table, noticing everything was already set up. You took your seat just as Anakin laid down the meal. Chicken parmesan with homemade lasagna.

“Oh Ani, my favorite! You didn’t have to, what’s the occasion?” You squealed

“No reason, like I said, only the best for my girl.” He smiled, lifting up his wine glass, you mirrored his actions, “I’d like to make a toast dedicated to you, my lovely, beautiful, amazing girlfriend. I love you, forever.” 

And I meant every word I said, when I said that I love you, I meant that I love you forever.

You were full on blushing now, “I love you too, Ani. A toast, to forever.” The two of you joined glasses, a clink echoed in the near quiet apartment.

You were awoken from your flashback by loud applause, did you just daydream during the remainder of the wedding? You turned to the old lady next to you, “Is it over?” She turned to look at you, appalled by your appearance but nodded nonetheless. “Oh am I crying,” awkward laugh, “I always cry at weddings..” You turned to look away and instead focused on the bride and groom newly wedded husband and wife making their way down the aisle. Both adorning smiles on their faces.

The guests were ushered outside near an open bar area. You were encouraged to take pictures but chose to watch the workers as they changed the venue from ceremony mode to reception mode. You noticed they kept most of the decorations, only adding circular tables and necessities. The lanterns now became centerpieces while the flowers scattered down the aisle were now randomly placed across the room. There was a long, rectangular table arranged in front of the white backdrop. Obviously for Padme and Anakin, along with their bridal party and family. You looked around quickly before leaving to go to the bathroom. Once there you took a deep breath and looked at yourself in the mirror. A gasp left your mouth, your looks were beyond atrocious. You closed your mouth before you could catch any flies and touched up your makeup.

Walking out of the bathroom you had nearly made it to the bar before you stumbled into somebody, “Hello there.” Seems like you couldn’t run away from your past, “Hello, Obi Wan. How are you?” After asking him, the two of you had spent the next fifteen minutes catching up on eachothers lives. Finally, the staff had announced that the tables were ready. Obi Wan promptly excused himself, now by yourself you went to go find your seat. To make your life easier, you went to the table where they had a list of names and where you could find your seat. You were sat at table three, pretty close to the front for someone who R.S.V.P.ed at the last second.

When you got to your table, you noticed there were already some people seated, none that you knew though. Sitting down, you began to mingle with your peers. Making small talk until the buffet was ready.

It took a while, but dinner was finally ready to start. You’d waited all day for this moment and you couldn’t wait. Once your table was dismissed, you got in line with a plate in your hand. The first thing you noticed was the variety, which was a good thing for you because you could eat to your heart's content. After making yourself a plate, you went back to your table to eat. You shoveled the delicious food into your mouth, hoping to get a second plate but you were interrupted by the clinking of glass. Toast time you thought to yourself, a frown upon your face. Darn, you were really keen on getting that second plate.

You zoned out during the toasts and eventually their first dance, all you could think about was getting out of this damn dress. You couldn’t wait to go home and take a hot shower while crying your eyes out. Coming back to the real world, you noted how everyone was standing up, crowding around Padme and Anakin as a cake was placed in front of them. Great, I really need to stop zoning out.

“Okay, before we continue with the cake cutting, I’d just like to say that not only is this cake to celebrate our marriage, but it’s also our gender reveal cake!” fuck, Fuck, FUCK..you really shouldn’t have come. God you’re so stupid, I mean why the fuck would would anyone think going to your exs wedding is a good idea. The room fell silent, anticipating the color of the cake. Gasps were let out when the piece of cake was shown. Pink and blue? Are they having- “Twins! We’re having twins!” Anakin shouted. You couldn’t breathe, you needed fresh air. You hurriedly stepped outside, choosing to sit down on a bench to try and collect your breath.

You must’ve been outside for a while because before you knew it, Anakin was sitting next to you. “What’re doing out here, Anakin? Shouldn’t you be inside dancing with your wife?” You asked.

“I wish..” Anakin scoffed, his eyebrows were furrowed deep in thought. “What do you mean? This is supposed to be the happiest day of your life. You just married the woman you love for crying out loud!” You protested.

Anakin let out a sigh, “Yeah, that’s just the thing. Padme was never supposed to get pregnant. We were never supposed to get married. The only reason why I proposed was because our agencies thought it would be good for our reputation.” This was some shocking news, you thought they truly loved each other. Well Anakin at least, you couldn’t speak for Padme.

“You know, the day after we broke up when I came to collect my belongings, I waited for you. I knew you were gone, waiting for me to finally leave. But I waited for you. For as long as I could.” You had no idea why Anakin was telling you this. Why would he bring something like this up… unless… no, it wasn’t possible.

When Anakin entered his your apartment, the first thing he noticed was how quiet it was. Sure, it was still morning, but you weren’t someone to sleep past 10 am. You had always enjoyed getting up early. It was before noon, so Anakin had just assumed you were out for brunch. He began to collect some of his belongings, only taking what was necessary. He didn’t want to take any of the pictures, just in case you missed him enough and wanted to longingly stare at them. So instead he took out his phone and took a photo of every picture he liked. The good, the bad, and the ugly; Anakin wanted to remember all of it. Entering your room, Anakin was quick to take what he needed. He almost left before he remembered the most important thing to him, his mother's ring. Anakin knew he couldn’t leave without so he went to find it. He searched high and low until he came across a box under the bed. Although the two of you were together, he never went through your things without permission. But Anakin was desperate, so he opened the box.

At first he was unsure of what he was looking at. Sure, the picture was simply black and white but he just couldn’t figure out what it was. Until his eyes drifted to the upper left hand corner, containing your full name, medical information, and the date. Was this what he thought it was? Were you pregnant? He took the ultrasound into his hands, forgetting about the ring.

He swore that at that very moment, he could’ve cried, and he did. What was he going to do now? He didn’t know if he should’ve waited for you to return or leave. On one hand he would be starting a family with you while on the other he would be following his dreams.

“So, you knew? That I was pregnant?” Anakin nodded his head, “..and you still chose to leave?” The words felt heavy on your tongue. “Believe me, I wanted to stay. For god's sake, y/n, I waited there for you. For HOURS! By the time I had to leave you still weren’t back. I had to choose between my passion and you. It wasn’t easy to make the decision, but you weren’t there and my future was awaiting me.” Anakin’s voice was quivering, it hurt him to think about this.

“Anakin, can I ask you a question?” Anakin nodded his head, motioning for you to go on. “The night we broke up, if I had told you that I was pregnant; would you have stayed?” His mouth opened as if he was going to answer, only for it to snap shut. Tears welled up in your eyes, you had your answer, “You know what, it doesn’t matter, it’s not like I kept the baby.” You shook your head, not wanting to cry in front of Anakin. You stood up, gathering your things and left without uttering another word to him. Everything he said to you was a lie, because if he had really loved you, he would’ve stayed.

And I'm gonna keep on loving you, because it's the only thing I wanna do.

-

By the time you had gotten home, you had much time to think. You’d spent the past five years dreaming of that exact moment. You would’ve told him you were pregnant, and in return he would’ve chosen to be with you. The two of you would get married and live a happy life with your children. But those dreams were shattered by the harsh reality. Anakin wouldn’t have stayed and he wouldn’t have married you.

Moving into the bathroom, you removed your makeup, seeing as it was ruined by your tears, again. Taking off your clothes, you hopped into the hot shower. You were going to cry but decided to give your eyes a rest since you had basically cried all the way home. After changing into your pajamas you creeped into your room.. Slowing making your way to bed, you got under the covers. Once you had almost fallen asleep, you felt something lay on your chest. You gently started stroking her hair, “Sorry, did I wake you, Shani?” you asked softly, a quiver in your voice.

“No, it’s okay momma. I was waiting for you to get home.” Her voice was quiet and delicate. “Are you okay momma?” Although she was barely five, she was a smart girl. She looked up, noticing your eyes were swollen. She must’ve heard the falter in your voice.

“Of course I am Ani, I’ve got my little angel with me.” She gently laid her head back down, her small arms doing their best to wrap around you. You continued stroking her hair until her breathing evened out, signalling she was asleep.

Soon after, you found yourself dozing off to the thought of what could’ve been.

I don't wanna sleep, I just wanna keep on loving you.

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