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petrichorium · 1 year

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BAM: Flower Crowns

in which gojo satoru, your beloved king and betrothed, knows his time is best spent in your company riling you up.

gojo satoru x fem!reader

word count: 2.5k reader: fem (she/her pronouns, fem terms, fem clothing including dresses) tags: fluff, royal au, childhood friends to lovers, once again hes pushy n the reader's a lil bit hesitant but hed stop if she rlly wanted, vague references to violence note: see i was gonna do a few lil scenes but the first one got away from me.... but basically the period of him courting the reader (which full disclosure isnt technically courting bc that should be happening before one proposes but this occurs while theyre engaged bc Gojo Didnt Get That Memo but i digress) is just him being WILDLY inappropriate for cultural standards, everyone silently pitying the reader, and the reader having a whole ton of conflicting emotions but ultimately rlly liking it 😭😭😭

usurper!gojo tag || masterlist

“they say you’re inhuman, you know.” you’ve finished the flower chain. his eyes don’t stray from your fingers as they nimbly connect the two ends and tie them together with a final stem into a thick circlet. “they said it a lot that night. they said you were the gods’ fury made mortal.”

he snickers. “how dramatic.”

you lift yourself up onto your thighs, shuffle towards him further and reach out, and he bows his head to let you place your creation upon it. your hand trails down when you let go, drifting over his ear and along his jaw as he lifts his head from its bow to look at you. you certainly mean to pull it away but his hand beats you to it, darting up to keep your palm against his cheek as you settle back down on the backs of your heels.

“i know why they came to that conclusion,” you say. “you terrified me when i saw you.”

“did you think me inhuman?”

you hum, eyes tracing along the band of flowers now gracing his forehead, falling to rest on his hand over yours. “no. never. monstrous, perhaps. odious. but very human.”

Satoru finds you out on the grounds, tucked away at the edge where the manicured gardens give way to rough forest. The weather has been turbulent, but for the first time since the coup there’s enough sun to stand being outside the castle longer than a scant few minutes. You’d said that morning that you planned to venture out, now that early spring flowers were beginning to bloom.

You’re cloaked in heavy furs, layers of skirts and wool protecting you from the cold, all elaborate garments that he’s gifted you. It's adorable (satisfying) to see you dressed up in his presents. He tells you as much when he finds you, delves into the treeline long before you see him so that he can sneak up upon you and whisper it into your ear to make you yelp and jump away.

“You mongrel,” you accuse with wide eyes and a hand on your heart as you work to steady your breathing. “Have you no respect for your future wife?”

“Ah, she admits it readily now? Progress.”

Your face twists as if someone has struck you. He chooses to ignore it and drops to sit sprawled out on the grass, beckoning unabashedly for you to join him on his lap. You won’t relent, he’s well aware, but he’ll have his desires known either way.

“Presumptuous,” you say. He'd die a happy man if you kissed him as many times as you called him that, but in lack of the former he’ll be content with the latter.

“Sit with me, my queen. I've missed you.”

“I am not yet your queen, Satoru,” you correct out of obligation. “You saw me an hour ago, we ate together.”

“Ah, but every moment apart is agony.” Satoru wonders if you know how serious he is beneath the breezy tone. From the way you wrinkle your nose, he doubts it.

“You have a meeting with your advisors now. You should not be out here.”

He pouts. “But you’re out here, and if I have to spend more time with those old fools than you today then I'll throw a tantrum tomorrow.”

You roll your eyes, let out a sigh that sounds long-suffering, but you shift your skirts and ease yourself down to sit gracefully before him with your legs tucked next to you. His threats aren’t empty and you know it.

“Fine.” You look down, as if inspecting the grass, spreading fingers along the blades as you begin to pluck wildflowers. Then you pause and glance up at him. “Remove those… oh, whatever they are. Let me see your eyes unhindered, at least.”

“Anything for my darling bride,” he coos at you, immediately doing as asked. He’d have done so anyway, if only to watch you lose yourself in staring when he reveals his eyes, catching yourself once he blinks and snapping your head back to the ground to busy yourself once more with plucking your blooms.

“How do you see a thing through those,” you grumble lowly, certainly just to break yourself from being flustered. It works too well; Satoru immediately jumps on the chance you’ve given him.

“Would you like to try them?” he asks, but doesn’t wait for a response, mind already conjuring an image of you draped in every golden chain and precious stone gracing his chambers.

He removes them from his face, pulling the chain from around his neck, and swiftly transfers them to yours before you can refuse—tilts your head up to look at him and tugs your hair out of the way with deft fingers, eases the gilded extremities onto your ears and lets the pads of his digits linger on either side of your head before pulling away. Pausing in your work and tilting your head back down to peer at him over the top of the frames, you blink at him owlishly from behind the glass, unused to staring through it. Precious, he thinks, and wishes briefly to kiss you—but he has to be smart about kissing you, calculating. Too much attention too fast and you have a tendency to pull away from him like the ebbing tide. It's agony for him, wanting nothing more than to hold you as much as he wishes, but as much as he wants there’s very little he hates more than when you tense under his touch and turn away from him.

“They suit you better,” he tells you, because they do. You look good adorned with jewelry of his design. “You oughtn’t wear them in public, though, or all the courtiers will be scrambling to get themselves a pair. Just for me, I suppose.”

Your nose wrinkles at the mention of your newfound influence, eyes darting to the side and lower lip pouting, an expression that makes him cast aside all his convoluted schemes to ease you into his affections. He leans down to peck at your lips, kiss away the pout, gone before you can complain. It’s fast enough that you don’t immediately recoil and give him a lecture on decorum, or perhaps you’re simply getting more used to it.

Satoru’s attention doesn’t stray as you return to your work. You’ve gravitated towards flowers with long stems, he realizes; collected them in a pile on your skirts, which you seem to have deemed large enough as you pick a notably long one up and begin to string them together in a chain. You don’t bother removing his glasses either, simply allowing them to slide down to the end of your nose. The golden chain clinks softly with every movement of your head.

He wonders when you learned to make them. You’ve always been so careful about the skills you acquire, but he thinks perhaps your mother might have taught you. Or his aunt, for how much she loves flowers, and for how much of her time as queen (he’s been told anyway) was spent doing such frivolous things as making daisy chains in the gardens. You’re so very meticulous with your actions, every choice carefully constructed. He knows you’ve been doing that less and less around him—perhaps it’s finally sinking in that he cares very little about your actions, that he finds everything you do to be enthralling. More likely you’ve exhausted yourself trying. You’ve certainly exhausted yourself attempting to rein him in, though he’d like to believe you’re beginning to allow yourself to enjoy his antics.

Posterity, he thinks, will paint him as you do—bold, brash, uncaring of tradition, unapologetic in pursuit of a woman far beneath his status. There are a great many reasons you hesitate to marry him, he doesn’t blame you for your doubt. Certainly when he was younger he’d never imagined himself the type of man you’d end up betrothed to; he couldn’t count on his fingers the number of more suitable matches for the both of you in the eyes of society, but whereas in his youth he might silence himself and go along with the whims of his advisors he’s lost all sense of decency now. His close call with death and the coup he’d spent years preparing for had rid him of any desire to compromise, and he stands now in a position where he can certainly refuse the very people who once held sway over him. And you appreciate all of that, he knows it. It’s one of the reasons he adores you so; beneath your veneer of decorum lies not a lady but a queen with desires all too different from those you’ve been forced to portray. He’s always known this, and to an extent he can’t find it within himself to regret the events that have led him to where he is today because if they hadn’t transpired he wouldn’t have you.

Satoru remembers a time in his youth when his mother made a passing mention that she enjoyed a certain hairstyle on young girls—two long braids, tied with ribbons. For months afterward all the upcoming court ladies wore it diligently, yourself included. He found it painful to see on you until he discovered that they made a lovely way to pull your nose from a book and fix your attention onto him, and that he could tug on the ribbons at the ends until they unfurled and he could pocket them to return later by tying them around the necks of one of his hunting dogs and sending it after you.

(If he were the kind of man you’d marry without hesitation he’d feel remorse for his childhood actions. Instead he’s the man you will marry, and he plots how to steal one of your hair ribbons again and return it in the same way. For memory’s sake.)

“They say you’re inhuman, you know.” You’ve finished the flower chain. His eyes don’t stray from your fingers as they nimbly connect the two ends and tie them together with a final stem into a thick circlet. “They said it a lot that night. They said you were the Gods’ fury made mortal.”

He snickers. “How dramatic.”

You lift yourself up onto your thighs, shuffle towards him further and reach out, and he bows his head to let you place your creation upon it. Your hand trails down when you let go, drifting over his ear and along his jaw as he lifts his head from its bow to look at you. You certainly mean to pull it away but his hand beats you to it, darting up to keep your palm against his cheek as you settle back down on the backs of your heels.

“I know why they came to that conclusion,” you say. “You terrified me when I saw you.”

“Did you think me inhuman?”

You hum, eyes tracing along the band of flowers now gracing his forehead, falling to rest on his hand over yours. “No. Never. Monstrous, perhaps. Odious. But very human.”

“You wound me. I might die by your cruelty.”

“Die, then.”

Satoru makes a show of it just for you. Falling back to sprawl on the ground, he gags violently, stabbing at his own heart with an invisible knife and convulsing with his tongue hanging out until you shriek for him to stop, voice filled with giggles. He takes that as a cue to still, to fall limp as if truly dead with eyes fluttering shut—then beckons you closer.

“I need…” he rasps out, barely audible.

You indulge him and do so. “My king?”

“…iss…”

“What?”

“True love’s kiss,” he repeats louder, pursing his lips expectantly. He doesn’t truly think you’ll do it, and you don’t—you lean in like you will, but bypass his lips entirely and bite his cheek instead.

He yelps, just for you, just so you’ll feel accomplished. And so he can see your smile, hear the smugness in your voice as you say, “It’s a miracle, you’ve come back to life.”

But he doesn’t give you weakness for free. No, he snakes his arms around your waist before you can pull back, and uses the grip to all but pull you on top of his lap as he sits up. Perhaps it’s his lack of insistence on you giving him a kiss, or perhaps he’s simply started to break down your walls enough, but whichever it is you don’t protest. Instead you seem to find flaws in the flower crown you’ve gifted him. Your lips purse, hands coming up to fiddle with the blooms. He realizes that he can’t stand a single moment of your attention on anything other than him, even if your fingers are nearly tangled in his hair.

“If I return to court with a crown of flowers made by my lover still on my head, do you suppose they’ll think me less inhuman?”

Your face falls at the suggestion, eyes widening in mortification. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“It's far more comfortable than that heavy gold. And I happen to personally adore the artisan who made it, so—”

“I don't trust you anymore, take it off! You’ve lost the right!” You attempt to remove it, but he reacts with the very reflexes that make him so inhuman, uses that monstrous height to lift his head higher than you can reasonably reach, though it doesn’t stop you from trying.

“It'd be rude of me to refuse a gift, my queen.” Laughing, Satoru holds you back with ease, eager for the excuse to put his hands all over you while you’re too worked up to feel self-conscious.

“Not yet,” you wail. “Not your queen yet, you knave!”

“Mine either way, though,” he replies smugly with a playful tug to the chain you still wear. “Covered in my presents. It’s only fair that I get to display a token you’ve given me, no?”

“No, it is not. You’ve stolen all of my outerwear and replaced it with these, I've no other choice. But you will not return to your advisors displaying that—that childish trifle, I won't allow it, you will not expose to the court that I made such a thing for yo—oh!”

He tackles you to the ground, careful not to even knock the wind out of you, though he steals your breath the moment you’re safe in his arms by pulling you into a kiss to keep you from talking further. He’d intended it to be faster, but his nose crashes into the tinted spectacles still upon your face and he’s filled with such ardor that he can’t help but deepen it.

Your hand slides behind his head, threads through his hair. He feels you snap a single stem between your fingers. The crown comes apart just as he takes a moment to pull away, and the flowers fall to scatter in the grass beneath him, a halo around your head. There’s a little smile on your face, your chest huffs with quiet laughter, and your palm slides down to the base of his hair. You use that hold and your other hand, which has fisted his tunic, to yank him down and connect your lips again.

Above, a cloud passes. Satoru can feel the sun shine warm on his back, hear the wind in the budding trees, smell the bite of melting snow and the petals of your wildflowers, yet there’s nothing that could distract him from the feeling of your kiss. His eyes close, he pushes closer though he hardly needs to with the way you still tug on his shirt. His arm comes up to brace next to your head, just to make sure he’s holding his own weight rather than crushing you, and the other leaves your waist to trail down your thigh and grip beneath your knee, shifting your leg to hook around him. If your mouth weren’t occupied he thinks you’d be lecturing him for such an obscene display in a place where anyone could stumble upon you—so he does well to keep it occupied, refusing to part even as your grip on his tunic loosens and he’s forced to grab your newly freed hand to pin it to the ground with fingers intertwined.

It's the first time you’ve ever kissed him. He already plots how to push you into doing it again when he finally pulls away, eyes locked on your swollen lips.

#gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo x y/n #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk x y/n #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru x y/n #mine.🌧#char.🌧 gojo #usurper!gojo

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ludwigplayingthetrombone · 2 years

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OFMD Fix-it Part 2

Ayyy here’s part 2! Thank you so much for the incredible response to part 1! I read the tags and comments often y’all are too nice ;v; Enjoy all 69 pages! tw for blood and injury

Part one

kofi

Wee john: Fuck yeah! Roach: We took over Blackbeard’s ship!! Frenchie: Oh no! You dastardly pirates are too scary for me! I surrender!!

Stede: All good everyone! Crew: IS IT?? Stede: [gasp] Did you guys take back the ship?? Ed: You’re shitting me Stede: Excellent job, everyone!

Ed: Hey! Stede: Oh, sorry! I look forward to hearing about it! Ed: Please don’t crack your face again Buttons: Were yee crying? Both: WHAT?! No! Ed: I physically cant cry Stede: Why so you keep asking that? Crew: Captain! Stede: WAIT I’m not discouraging this energy, but please be careful of-

Ivan: What do you want us to do with Izzy, captain? Frenchie: OH FUCK THE KNIFE! Swede: PULL IT OUT! Roach and jim: NO!! [schluck] Pete: FUCK PUT IT BACK IN!! Roach and jim: NO!! Ed: Why disturb him? Sleeping so peacefully. I’ll deal with him later [schluck]

Pete: Where’s lucius? Stede: Yes, we’re missing lucius. Ed! Is the boy below deck? Pete: Did something happen? Frenchie: Oh yeah almost forgot! [knocking on the deck] Stede: What’s this, frenchie? Ed: Lucius is dea-

Lucius: OH THANK GOD! I was going mad in that wa-

Pete: Where have you been? Stede: Lucius! Good to see you, my boy! wee john: Cap’n... Lucius: I was hiding in a secret wall I’d found. Frenchie thought I was a ghost for about a week. Luckily the ship was a barnacled mess Frenchie: Still not convinced if I’m bein’ honest. Couldnt believe you’d survived, Stede: Survived? Pete: Why would you be a ghost, babe? Lucius: Because Blackbeard threw me overboard

Ed: A momentary laspe of judgement Olu: Oh shit

Stede: [knocks] Ed? [door unlocks]

Ed: Ship’s yours again. I can be gone- Stede: you’re leaving? Ed: I nearly killed lucius. Aren’t you upset? Stede: Absolutely livid, but you didnt succeed, thankfully! The atmosphere is tense, things are a little unclear, but they’re open to speaking. I’ve forgiven them for planning to kill me! Blows over quite fast, I’m sure- Ed: I’m a terrible person, stede. You don’t even-

Ed: Crew needed me. Wanted to help me. And I chose Blackbeard. All ‘cuz Izzy opened his FUCKING mouth ‘n backed me into a corner! Lucius would see right through it. I didn’t know what else to d- [flinch] Stede: It’s ok

Stede: Blackbeard is how you’ve been surviving. I understand that now. The only reason you were put in that position was because of my poor decisions. I promise I’ll be here no matter what to help us all get through this. Ed: Pull up the chair, I want my knife back Stede: Oh good finally...

Ed: So a big cat, a carriage accident, and a dropped piano? All at once? Fuckin’ hell, mate, you let ‘em have it. Though, I’d go as far to say the cat was too much. Stede: Whaaat? How could you say that about Ned? He did great. Ed: Just BITTER I wasnt there to see it

Stede: I’m sorry you had to do this again. I know you’re still angry...Ed: Wasn’t about being angry... not at first at least. Just felt.... sad. Really fucking sad, Stede. Didn’t know what to do without you here. None of us did. Felt... Like I just wanted to lay down and die Stede: I...I didnt think my absence would be felt this deeply

Ed: Oh shut- You’re not serious Stede: No, I’m serious. Mary and the kids were much happier when we were planning my departure fuckery. I genuinely can’t think of a time where someone missed my presence

Ed: Well fuck everyone else. Was the crew pissed when you said why you left? Stede: Very much so Ed: Then they missed you, cheers [mumble] I sure as fuck missed you Stede: You did? Sorry, Impulse. Ed: Lean up a bit Stede: I hop I can earn your trust back one day

Ed: Well, knowing about that Chauncey fuck makes me less pissed at you. Least you didn’t ditch me ‘cuz you didn’t want me around anymore. Stede: Oh no, I’ve liked you since the day we met. Ed: You did look hot bleedin’ out on the deck of that spanish ship. Stede: I’m choosing not to unpack that at this moment. Ed: All done up you go! [loud closed-mouthed scream] [ed repressing laughter] You good? Guts still in? Stede: [strained]I think so Ed: Lean on me til it passes

Thanks, did you sew me up the first time? Ed: Nah, that was fang Stede: That fang, beautiful work Ed: Go lay down. I gotta clean up your blood Stede: Again, sorry

Ed: If you apologize one more time for being stabbed, I’ll stab you again Stede: But it led to so much character development last ti- I’ll leave you to it then

Stede: Ah, is this my-? What’s it doing under th-

Stede: Forget I- Ed: No, that’s- I mean, it is yours... It doesnt even smell like y- JUST PUT IT ON

S: May I ask you-? E: shoot S: Why did you let me board the ship? E: I was tired of izzy nagging to blast you with the cannons. Kept talkin’ in my ear about you ‘n it just made me angrier and angrier. Got me so amped up to just fucking kill you the moment I saw you again. Thought I'd just be furious, but I felt... giddy? /hated/ that my chest was pounding, that just made me angrier

E: Then you show up with your tits out looking handsome as shit. S: hmmm [olu: One last thing, captain Stede: What is it, olu- RIP] E: I thought of it too. Leaving. Thought I’d get ahead before I disappointed you. Wasn’t itching for adventure, I knew I was in too deep with you S: I always thought I was disappointing /you/. I’m not the most exciting person E: Me?

E: Stede, you’re the boldest bugger i’ve ever met. Ever since i’ve known about you, you’ve made the most batshit ballsy moves. You took those English hostage, you swindled iz to get them back. you told blackbeard to go suck eggs in hell You stood up to the weird twins, to the English navy, to those richies at that party, to izzy, to jack, to ME. You’re the coolest, kindest person I know, Stede. I’m nuts about you. S: … guess I've never seen myself from that perspective E: If anyone else told me that story, i’d have them tied to the anchor for such a bullshit lie, but it’s you, so i believe it. Its as ridiculous as you are.

E: do you think I’ve ever gotten this upset over some quick drunk fuck parting ways? Only you.

S: Why only me, though?

E: You’re the only person that makes me feel… safe? Like I don’t have to be blackbeard 24/7. Most of my old mates were just dickheads who showed up when they wanted something the buggered off

Dont’ gotta worry about you stabbin’ me in my sleep cause i pissed you off. You don’t laugh when I talk about a fine fabric or a pretty looking teacup. I’ve told you things I thought I’d take to my grave because anyone else would throw it back in my face... But not you. I like your fire hazard, secret passage ship, your crew, when you talk about clothes ‘n book ‘n flowers. You don’t act like anyone else but you... And I envy that

Ed: Because it’s you

Stede: No one’s ever thought that about me... I’m sorry. Hah, I feel a bit dizzy. Ed: Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Lay down if you need [stede crying] Stede?

Stede: You’re the first person who doesnt think I’m a burden. My father, Mary, peers- My whole life- That I was selfish for being born [crying] Ed: Again, Stede, Feck ‘em

Stede: Meeting you was the best day of my life. I was so relieved when you- on the beach- Yuo looked so happy, and I destroyed that Ed: shhh

ed: It’ll be ok

Ed: Look at me. You came back

Ed: And that made Ed happ- IZ: EDWARD, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! [IZZY YELLING]

Ed:[calm] I’m sorry, Will you excuse me for one moment? Stede: Feel free! Ed: Thank-you [Izzy still yelling] [door slam] rapid steps]

[clattering above] [Izzy screaming] [crew cheering] foot falls approaching]

Ed: Now, where were we? Stede: ....Actually I do wanna know Ed: Let’s say, Bit too tied up to bother us again

[stede huffs a laugh] Ed: You look exhausted, you should rest. Pincushion gets the mattress Stede: oh no, I couldn’t. where are you sleeping? Ed: Perfectly comfortable desk right here. [pained moan] Stede: Right... Ed: Night, Stede

ed: I’ll steal a couch soon. ‘M too old to sleep on desks now Stede: I have no qualms [ed sighs]

Ed: Hey, stede Stede: Mm Ed: Can we.... Can we just forget about the beach and start over?

Stede: I don’t think I can this time, Ed. Ed: Slightly concerned you can forget me almost killing you but not a kiss Stede: I’ve decided to be done with running away from my problems and pretending they never happened. But beyond that, My whole world shifted with that kiss. I can’t ever forget that. The memory alone kept me rowing to get to you again

Stede: We’ve hurt eachother, but I’m more than willing to put in the work to mend it... Which is something I never did with mary. Ed: I wont stab you in the earhole by the way. Got mine out of he way. Stede: Only fair! We’re even now. Ed: But mine was funny [swat] [giggle]

Ed: Last thing, then you can sleep off the stab wound Stede: Oh good... Ed: If Blackbeard was gone for good, would you stay? Lotta folks want the novelty y’ know. ‘S been gnashing at the back of my skull. Stede: I met Ed first not Blackbeard

Stede: ‘M staying forever now. Best friends at first sight. From my point of view at least

Ed:...Olivia... How ya doin’, Iz? Iz: Are you fucking joking? Just tell me what’s going on

Ed: Stede won. Crew took the ship back. I’m staying. Oh and lucius is alive, as you saw. Kid said the ship was so mucked up, he was able to hang on to sneak onto the ship. Thought you handled that way back when? Iz: that fookin- Ed: So i’m giving you a choice.

Iz: Just cut my foot off at this point anything but this. Ed: why can’t you ever just relax, izzy? It doesnt have to go this way, yet you stomp your feet Every. Single. Time. How many years have we known eachother; do you even like my company? Iz: How could you even say that to me? I’ve given my life to you time and time again. And You’re going to let some tart waltz back in and uproot everything we built. Ed: Built what? We’re fucking pirates, mate!

Powertrip’s over. This is it. It was a good ride. Fang: Lucius! You’re missing this shit!! Ed: You may love waiting to end up like... another leather clad, middle aged sad sack dying alone in a puddle of his own piss, but you’re not dragging me there with you. So make a choice Iz: You’d really let me walk? Ed: Truthfully, i’d prefer you play nice and enjoy yourself for once. but I’ll give you three options.

Ed: Old way is gone. Either one, accept that and keep it pushin’. Two, I would just let you fuck off, but you’ve proven to be a liability out of my sight, so i’ll have fang cut your talk box, so you never speak stede’s name ever again THEN you can fuck off. And three, more of a clause to one,

Ed: If you go rogue, I’ll make you beg for hell. Threaten anyone on this ship again, You’ll never feel the warmth of the sun ever again

Ed: I’ll let you down if you behave

Iz: [despair sigh] just leave me up here a while longer. ‘S quiet for once. Ed: well alright, take some time to process. let fang know when you gotta piss Lucius: Bad morning? Iz: Yeah, keep staring, twat Lucius: That sounded threatening, right fang? Fang: He’s not above pissin’ on you, kid

Ed: [muffled] breakfast? [smack] Didn’t remember blackbeard snuck into your bed? Stede: No, I remember. Had to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating again. Also, once again, you’ve processed this very quickly

Ed: Were yee seein’ phantoms? Stede: No more guilt phantoms thank goodness. Was getting sick of those buggers. Ed: Love a good phantom. You seem less tightly wound. Glad you’re phantom free

Stede: Took awhile to realize, but This is where I belong. Ed: No fucking shit

Ed: Speaking of, Y’ know, I’ve thought on it, and I’ve decided I’m tired of being angry and sad and lonely. Fucking sick of it. Already stabbed you, no sense in wasting time acting mad when I know what I want S: And what is that? E: Wanna be liked and kissed and happy.

Stede: Perfectly reasonable things to- Ed: I also want to be co-captains with the gentleman pirate. [choke] I’m lying in your bed with you, stede. Who do you think’ll be kissing me? The swede? Stede: I didn’t want to PRESUME. Is this a new job role for co-captains? Ed: Is now! ‘S why I promoted you. But you’re still on thin fucking ice. Stede: Poor jim. Promoted in less than a day. Ed: Don’t actually tell jim. They’re super pissed at me Stede: oH Ed: Now, onto couch theft, I’m thinkin’-

Stede: You’ve got some- Ed: I get it? Stede: Not quite, just- Oh- fuck it

Ed: Dastardly man. Diabolical. Definitely not gentlemenly

Ed: Fuckin’ missed you!

End

#gentlebeard #blackbonnet #our flag means death #ofmd #my art

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y0imyas · 2 years

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[ arlecchino | tartaglia / childe ; sweetheart ]

warnings : fembodied!reader (referred to as sweetheart, my girl, girlfriend . . . ; she/her pronouns used) ; no protection mentioned (coming inside) ; threesome ; oral (fem receiving ; reader & arlecchino) ; arlecchino kinda leads the whole thing lol and is referred to as she / her to avoid confusion ; think that's all

a/n: repost because tags didnt work ; my brain was only filled with childe and arlecchino oh my god i'm so weak for them ; this is probably the first and last time i'm ever writing anything involving a dom!woman lol

“oh, don’t you look pretty like this, you two”, the soft giggle from across the room made you push childe away and sit up quickly with the blanket as a cover while you looked straight into arlecchino’s eyes. did she just catch you getting eaten out by your boyfriend?

childe rolled his eyes as he saw his fellow harbinger colleague standing at the doorstep and quickly grabbed his shirt from the ground to hand it to you. you quickly put it on, your face burning up in embarrassment and you quickly looked down. “oh, sweetheart, no need to be so shy”, arlecchino slowly came closer to you. “you indeed looked very pretty.” she softly placed her hand on your cheek, softly caressing.

“what do you want?”, childe groaned in annoyance as he wiped the remnants of your slick on his lips away and laid down on the bed. “we were obviously busy, arlecchino.”

“now, now, is this an appropriate way to talk to me? don’t forget where you stand, tartaglia”, arlecchino’s tone got a lot colder as she moved her attention to her fellow harbinger. but when she looked back at you, her gaze was a lot softer. it was as if she had a soft spot for you – whatever it is, she was handling you like porcelain. “may i?”

arlecchino tugged at the blanket and pulled it off your body once you nodded, slightly hesitating. there was something about the look in her dark eyes that made your body shiver. “there’s absolutely no need to be nervous, darling. it’s just me, you know me”, arlecchino tried to make you feel a little less tense about the entire situation.

“hey, now, this isn’t fair!”, childe complained. “you can’t just barge in here, interrupt my time with my girlfriend and take over my place.” arlecchino rolled her eyes in annoyance.

“i can if she wants to”, arlecchino said and grinned as she slowly took off the shirt that childe had given to you moments ago. “it’s all about her, after all, isn’t it?” she was quick to hover over your body and start peppering soft kisses over your neck, collarbone, chest. she pinched your one nipple while softly sucking and biting the other one, having you writhe because of the ministration.

childe couldn’t help himself but closely pay attention to how you reacted, his sweet girl receiving pleasure from his fellow colleague. he had no idea why, but there was this sudden need to leave sweet little marks on your neck, just that he would be able to show off that you belonged to him – despite arlecchino being the one leaving wet kisses over your stomach and finally reaching your already sensitive clit.

you let out one particularly loud moan when arlecchino started sucking and giving you little kitten licks as her one finger continued circling your clit, having you grip childe’s hand tightly. your body started shaking as the climax you were about to reach when your boyfriend was eating you out slowly built up again and it didn’t take much longer for you to come on arlecchino’s tongue as she smirked to your body twitching like crazy.

“how was that, sweetheart?”, arlecchino asked as she sat up once again. “don’t you think you should return the favor?”

as if in trance, you let go of childe’s hand and turned your focus to arlecchino laying right next to you, already naked, in the huge bed that your boyfriend only got because “he needed his space while fucking you” (which he said like he was telling a joke, but was totally serious about it when the bed finally arrived in your shared apartment).

“cut the foreplay, i’m not really in the mood for it”, arlecchino said. “why don’t you fuck her, tartaglia? ‘think she’d like that.” childe’s eyes widened at the suggestion. why didn’t he think of that? it didn’t take long until he was behind you, his hips moving in a rather quick pace as you tried to focus on arlecchino having her legs spread for you to eat her out – which wasn’t as easy as you had hoped for.

having your boyfriend overstimulating you with his hard and fast thrusts wasn’t very helpful – you were feeling too good to focus, which obviously wasn’t very much to arlecchino’s liking. “now, sweetheart, i thought i told you what to do. do i really have to punish you for not listening?”

childe let out a groan as your walls tightened around him when arlecchino said these words. who knew that you would get so weak by having arlecchino command you around? maybe he should ask her to join again in the future… or just watch you get your mind blown away by her.

“n-no”, you stammered, still not able to form any sort of coherent sentence. “i’m sorry, please, i just–”

you couldn’t continue when childe made you cry out in pleasure with some quick thrusts, his grip on your hips were so tight that you knew there would be bruises tomorrow.

“you just what, sweetheart? aren’t you cute getting fucked by your boyfriend”, she kept on mumbling soft praises into your ear, until you finally came around childe’s cock once again. that pushed him over the edge, having him come deep inside you and letting out a groan while he continued with a few slow thrusts to come down from his high.

when he pulled out, he watched his cum drip out of your hole and before there was a big mess on the sheets, he collected some of the cum and slowly pushed his fingers into your hole. “please, give me a break”, you cried out, there were tears on your cheeks that arlecchino softly brushed away with her fingers.

“but you look so pretty like this, sweetheart. let us have some more fun with you, will you?”

#genshin impact #genshin impact fanfiction #genshin impact smut #genshin impact childe #genshin impact tartaglia #childe smut #tartaglia smut #arlecchino #arlecchino smut #genshin smut #❀ childe posts

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slimy-vore-bog · 11 months

Text

WARNING: groomer in the SFW vore community (serious)

Content/Trigger warning: discussions of grooming, mention of incest, and sexual and fatal vore

I am posting to tags to try to keep people safe!

This specifically occured in the Owl House corner of this community, but everyone should be warned

I will put the rest of the post below keep reading, but for now the person I'm accussing is known as "les-the-mess" on here and "LesTheMessy" on DeviantArt (I do not remember the discord name) and she is 23/24 years of age

And lastly that a real minor has been contacted by said person and made very uncomfortable (url will not be stated for their safety)

Remember to check everything I say for yourself, if you don't believe me; I would not accuse this person publicly if I didn't consider them a real threat All except the minor's statement are available online

I am feeling sick to my stomach that this happened and I don't know how to handle this. I'm going to tell this a bit more like a story so I can get it out easier

I was on DA (DeviantArt) when I saw something odd pop up; a vore edit of Catra and Adora with Luz and Amity as prey. I looked at it, because I am always up to find more sfw safe vore creators, but it was neither safe or non-sexual

There were clearly comments engaging with the art in a sexual way and the creator didn't discourage or delete said comments and the description itself mentioned how the vore was going to end with both prey characters dying.

This person had an identical avatar and near identical username to their URL here on tumblr and I was horrified as I knew that this person had interacted with a minor despite having "minors DNI" and that already gave me a slight prickling suspicion something was wrong (later learned she has even DMed them on discord...)

They had both minors and NSFW in her DNI so I didn't have anything to go after, as they didn't have any post with suspicious stuff here or followed any weird blogs and I brushed it off initially

Her posts on DA however... Very fucking damning: almost all their edits are of minors and adults in vore or of the character The Collector (Which is a child who is also a god; he is immortal, but at the point we last see them is mentally an 8-10 year old)

Now I didn't pick the most damning thing to screenshot, as it was too gross (unbirth incest between Luz the main character, her girlfriend and Luz's mother Camila) but here is one example of one of their posts:

Odalia/nickname Mamadalia is an antagonist of the show and an adult woman

Here is a screenshot of her account on tumblr:

Very lousily taken, but I was too distraught to care

I contacted the minor (who I am already friendly with, since I wanted to support the growth of their blog) as soon as I deemed this person to be a threat and the minor has told me that she has indeed acted weird towards them, but it only clicked now after I shared what I did...

The minors own words when I asked for details:

"I can't remeber what we talked about exactly since I deleted my discord in a panic-

But it was first of with the collector, at first it seemed harmless, but I started getting uncomfortable when it entered into the vore Stuff, like, I dont why but it rubbed me the wrong way but I didnt say anything since it sorta felt…uneasy to say the least, and i feel stupid because i never said anything about it

She also talked a lot about digestion aswell, and when I brought up the no minors thing- she said it was because she managed and 18+ discord server and it was okay for us to talk, and I feel this is extremely important to mention- she reposted your art to me without credit, I cant remeber everything but i hope this is enough"

Now the last thing I will say I don't have much of an opinion on, because of how severe the situation is, but I wanted to include the full message (Split up into paragraphs for easier reading)

I might have forgotten some stuff, but this is all I can think of right now

Please just stay safe, stay away and block/report this person!

#important #safe vore #toh vore #sfw vore #soft vore #gt vore #extreme cuddling #t0h vore

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the-letter-s · 4 months

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please tell me about jod and the people he pisses off, I have to know why that post was so relatable for him - @pretend-pretend-vampire

Okay so the first thing you need to know about Jod is he actually spells his name/psuedonym God, you know, like Christian Capital G God, I just tag and spell his name the way he has decided it is phonetically pronounced (Jod) because that is a lot less confusing The second thing you need to know about Jod is he just doesn't know when to stop committing to the bit. Ever. Its a defense mechanism so other kindred dont find out about the actual things he cares about. Such bits include -talking about the coterie ventrue's very real wife who is for sure alive and a woman and is also for sure cheating on him (for context said ventrue is a gay man who as far as Jod knows has never had a wife) -some fucking how convincing the whole ass fucking prince that the moon turning green is a sign of gehenna. This is based on literally nothing and gonna be honest Jod didnt think he would be taken seriously about that one. Hopefully the moon never turns green or shit is gonna Get Bad! -consistently changing his story about who he is or who he used to be in increasingly unbelievable detail -keeps attempting to steal library books, not for any nefarious purposes he just thinks its funny that literally everyone will try to explain that he really does not need to do that and thats not how libraries work -confidently declaring that the coterie tremere really really wants to find mothman and that he is going to Help. She does Not want to find mothman. Not Even A Little Bit -speaking of said tremere he also keeps trying to watch ancient aliens in her haven. She Does Not Approve -keeps implying that theres something super dangerous or secret in his haven and thus no one else is allowed to go in there, there honestly isn't but also one of the other players follows me on here so dm me for more info on that one -Vriska Serket Is A Real Kindred Who Is Real And Exists And Is A Threat And You Should Tell The Sheriff About Her Because He Would Never Believe Me, A Clearly Intoxicated Malkavian -Extremely inappropriate outfits Always. The only thing between this man and wearing assless chaps and booty shorts that say "this is not a place of honor" on the ass to elysium is the rest of his coterie still trying to keep a shred of dignity oh also he has an alcohol problem. Gonna be honest I dont think that would piss anyone off by itself necessarily but it also means that he's generally not considering the conses that could quence in very high pressure social situations so even if he is not committed to a bit in a specific moment and is actually trying to Be Serious For Real he is not exactly eloquent or polite about it!!! This is Very Bad when dealing with the camarilla!! Like he gets some leeway on account of the divine madness but not quite enough to make up the difference. But He Hasnt Met The Final Death Over It yet So Its Fine Do Not Worry About It

#ask oh boy #jod post #its 2am so if this is not coherent. yeah

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noforkingclue · 1 year

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Pls do some gabriel x god!reader where reader is one of the pagan god at the meeting by kali and baldur. Whether reader is good friend of gabriel or former lover like kali is up to u. But whatever happen ur last meet gabriel didnt end well now reunion will they patch up? Thanks in advance.

Of course anon! Hope you like the fic :)

Title: One Last Warning

Everything tag list: @greenrevolutionary, @byebyebreezywrites, @spngingerbread21, @layazul, @lov3vivian, @simonsbluee

“What the fuck are you doing here?” you hissed when you realised who pulled you into the room, “And get your hands off of me.”

“Relax, sweetheart-“

“Don’t you ‘sweetheart’ me, Loki,” you jabbed him on the chest, “Or have you stopped going by that now, Gabriel?”

“You know me,” Gabriel smirked but did let go, “Always got a trick or five up my sleeve.”

You gave him one last glare and turned to leave the room. Your last meeting with the archangel turned trickster didn’t end well and you didn’t fancy reuniting with him any time soon. It didn’t matter that your argument happened almost five hundred years ago, you were still pissed at him. Gabriel sighed and with a click of his fingers you found yourself sitting on the bed.

“What the fuck?”

Before you could get up Gabriel was in front of you. He sat down next to you and after a moment’s hesitation, put a hand on your knee. You raised an eyebrow at how uncharacteristically serious he was being and a feeling on uneasiness settled in the pit of your stomach.

“What’s wrong?” you asked

“Oh the usual,” Gabriel grinned at you, “Just the apocalypse. My brothers. Nothing new.”

“Don’t bullshit me.”

“I want you to leave.”

“Excuse me?”

You tried to stand up but Gabriel was stronger and he grabbed your arm. You let out a string of ancient curse words as you were yanked back down onto the mattress. You had forgotten just how strong Gabriel actually was. Even before you knew he was an archangel he had always been unusually strong, even for a God.

“It isn’t safe for you here.”

“Shouldn’t you be telling Kali that?”

“Is that jealousy I detect?” Gabriel asked with a smirk as he leant closer, “I didn’t think you were the Goddess of Jealousy.”

“Be serious Gabe.”

“About this, so am I.”

Gabriel grabbed your hands and gave them a squeeze.

“I’m going to try and stop this,” he said, “But if I can’t,” he took a deep breath, “I don’t want you here.”

“Why.”

“Trust me, darling.”

“No nicknames.”

“You started it.”

“No I didn’t! You called me ‘sweetheart’.”

“Fine,” Gabriel rolled his eyes, “You continued it. Happy?”

“How?”

“You called me ‘Gabe’.”

You opened and closed your mouth a couple of times as you realised your slip up. Gabriel had that same smug look on his face that made you want to slap him all over again. You clenched your fist tightly.

“Tell me why I should leave,” you said firmly, “And I might consider it.”

Gabriel sighed and for a second you thought he wasn’t going to tell you. Then he said,

“My brother. He will kill you.”

“We-“

“No, you won’t be able to stop him. Just for once, will you listen to me?”

“Once,” you stood up, your anger now returned in full blast, “I listened to you once, Gabriel. You remember how that turned out? So no, you will not be telling me what to do anymore. Sorry but you had your chance once and you blew it. Goodbye Gabriel.”

You walked towards the door and paused before leaving. You gave Gabriel one last look before shaking your head a disappearing. You could only hope that for once he was wrong about something.

#fanfiction #supernatural #reader insert #request #gabriel #gabriel x reader

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acompassionatemonster · 7 months

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I seriously think I’m speaking to a three year old because there’s no way you can be older than a toddler with how stupid you are. If you are older, please consider going back to school because you’re not gonna get far in life with your lack of common sense and underdeveloped brain. There is no way you can call me illiterate when you literally started your reply with, ‘not you’re mad’ and ended with ‘stay one that Jujutsu Kaisen season two’. And in your first reply you did get your ‘your’ and ‘you’re’ mixed up - you used ‘your’ when it should’ve been ‘you’re so scared’. Now please tell me if that made any sense. Take your head out of your ass and admit how much of an imbecile you are.

Love don’t worry about if I have a job or not, I know I am and will be fine but it’s you that you should be worried about right now. I don’t think you can get a job with your stupidity and illiteracy - no wonder why you read manga, bro just follows the pictures and ignores all the actual writing. Please do yourself and everyone else a favour and log off of Tumblr and every other social and pick up an actual book.

Oh come on now, don’t be a coward and avoid my question. I’ll stop bothering you when you either answer what media you are planning to consume soon or admit that you putting a Gojo spoiler without any spoiler warning and under a Toji tag was idiotic and insensitive (even though you strongly disagree - I’m sorry I didn’t know we had a new Joker over here- not that you have the IQ to be able to pull that off). I’m sorry that I’m the only honest person in your life to say you are insensitive. I bet you don’t even know what that word means given that your literacy and comprehension skills are very limited. So I’ll help you out a bit (because I doubt you can even spell it) and give you a definition, ‘insensitive’ (an adjective) - showing or feeling no concern for other’s feelings. A synonym would be ‘inconsiderate’. You can’t prove me wrong that those words don’t describe you. It was a big spoiler and I know it because you were probably crying over it and in your post you literally say you’re not ‘reading jjk anymore idc’ - therefore, you had no right in spoiling it for others, get that into your thick head and small fish brain.

I’m sorry I didn’t know you were a sheep and posting spoilers without warnings because, ‘literally everyone on here isn’t’. Are you that daft? Just because everyone isn’t, doesn’t mean it’s not wrong. Bro are you saying that if the purge happened and everyone was out wreaking havoc, you’d do the same thing and still say it’s not wrong? Are you a child that doesn’t know right from wrong? Please for the love of God, for your own future and safety, go back to school.

TLDR: stfu and tell me your opinion when you have a present dad x and sorry if this was too much writing for your bozo self to process mwah.

I think I'm speaking to someone who dropped out of school, like literally dropped out of school in the 7th grade. Because if YOU'RE SO SCARED OF SPOILERS WHY ARE YOU ON TUMBLR?? LIKE I FUCKING SAID YOU PEOPLE HAVE SERIOUS ISSUES. IF YOU DONT READ THE NEW CHAPTERS THEN THATS, ON WHO??? ITS ON YOU. and why are you harassing me about my spelling?? Bitch it's fucking Tumblr, I'm not writing a thesis, a research paper or even a fucking essay. If I wanted to write a whole fucking article and then yes I would make sure that my spellings of both 'your' and 'you're were correct. However IM NOT. AND IDGAF. So why tf would I care if I spelt something wrong or mixed a few words up???. You bitches are talentless, jobless, bored and can't fucking read nor write and still live with YOURE parents in their BASEMENT. AND WANNA COME AFTER ME BECAUSE YOU GOT SPOILED. BITCH I DONT CARE IF YOU DIDNT READ THE CHAPTER AND FOUND OUT GOJO IS DEAD!!!!! BECAUSE SOCIAL MEDIA HAS SPOILERS E V E R Y W H E R E. DONT COME ONLINE AND YOU WONT GET SPOLUED THEN YOU FUCKING ASSHAT. YOUR mother must have dropped your special ass on the head as a baby, because why are you at YOUR grown ass age GOING ON DIFFERENT PROFILES TO HARASS ME ABOUT A FICTIONAL FUCKING CHARACTER. I just fucking know you don't take baths OR EVEN WASH THAT FUCKING FILTHY ASS OF YOURS. it's fucking disgusting that YOUR Neanderthal ass came on here to give me a hard time because you what??? Can't keep up with the chapters when it releases??? Not my problem fucktard. And I'll tag my fucking posts with whatever I want. And I did answer your question, I said and I quote I don't care sweetie. So why don't you go to sleep and roll over on that cockroach infested ass floor mattress you sleep on every night. Roll over and go get caught up to the new chapters. Imagine trying to harass someone because YOU live in a section 8 apartment, with 15 other family members, have roaches and rats crawling all over you while you sleep and mad at me. NOBODY GIVES A FUCK ABOUT YOU!!! I'm just sure YOURE a fucking foster child whose mother and father left your Crack baby ass in foster care. Because there's no way that someone who had a loving, family or SUPPORT SYSTEM IS THIS BOTHERED. AND IF YOU'RE SO FUCKING BRAVE WHY WERE YOU POSTING ANONYMOUSLY??? GET A LIFE YOU SMALL BRAINED, LONELY, PATHETIC, NEANDERTHAL ASS BITCH. I HOPE YOU TOSS AND TURN ON THAT FLOOR MATTRESS YOU SHARE WITH YOU 8 SIBLINGS EVERY NIGHT.

and stop coming on my page, mad ass., stupid ass, MONKEY ASS BITCH.

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moonjxsung · 8 days

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i completely missed that you responded to my ask omg oops sorry 😭😭😭 anyways ummm tw for suicide mentions, cheating, a minor getting involved with adults (no explicit details), asian fetishization, manipulation (please know that this is quite a lot)

so i dated this girl in 2018 who was about a year younger than me, i was around 13-14 during the time so she was 12-13 or so (also since we were so young she might be better now, i have no idea. i could've done things better too and should've left, but we were both kids too, so. yeah)

first of all she'd be possessive over her biases, so a lot of the time i had to hold back around her if i liked the same idol she did, and for quite a while i really disliked nct because of her (but im fully over it now)

she used to go on omegle all the time and she purposefully tagged it with "asian, korean, nsfw, dom" etcetc and she'd do this on call right in front of me, flirting with strangers AND she'd lie about her age ALLLLLL the time.. so often she'd claim to be 16-18 to people who were 18+

me and our other 2 friends told her Not to do that but i dont think we ourselves even fully grasped the situation. to this day im not sure how far any of her conversations or friendships went with people who she lied to :/ i only know about one guy who realized/found out(?) that she wasnt in fact the age she said she was and i think he just cut it off and she was talking about it to me

(a side note about the omegle thing, i decided to try it once on call and also flirted with a stranger Which was wrong ofc, but also she immediately started crying and left call whereas this was a daily thing she did towards me......)

she lied about having jungkooks skype so she could switch back and forth between calls with her friends it was so ?????? 😭😭😭😭😭 we did not believe her but she was so adamant on it LMFAOOOOOOOOO

tw for suicide here

a LOT of times she'd suddenly hate me (idr her reasonings. i think it was her thinking i wasnt there for her or i didnt want to date her anymore) and she'd block me out of nowhere or she'd often "threaten suicide" i say that but technically thats not even what she did. she straight up told me how she was gonna attempt or told me she was in the middle of attempting, and multiple times i got on calls trying to calm her down and get her help. very awesome experience for a teen to go through:) i have no clue if any of it was even real either, so there's that

but yeah it was just very on and off and when i finally fully cut her off she Blamed me and got mad that i was cutting her off for my own mental health and wellbeing, she called me selfish for "cutting her off because she was suicidal" Which was not exactly the case.. i wouldnt cut someone off for just that, there were more layers to it

anyways i havent seen her in years. hope she's improved at least a bit now that she's older - puppy anon

Omg WHATTT is it with people who find pleasure in openly flirting right in front of you with people online????…?/??/? My last situationship did that shit all the time as a “joke” but got mad if I called anyone (even an idol????) remotely attractive like!?? What are you gaining? Out of doing that?????? That’s really terrible that she lied about her age too oh my god those people could’ve gotten in SERIOUS trouble just because she wanted to be silly online wtaf……..

THE JUNGKOOK SKYPE THIS IS CRAZYYYYYZUSKKSSKLZKS HELP MEEEEE 😭😭 why do people think they’re convincing anyone by lying about the most out of pocket shit LMAOOOO

The suicide thing is absolutely abhorrent behavior oh my god…. I don’t know WHAT it is with friends or relationships who threaten suicide and then either block you or disappear for hours on end and they don’t understand the fucking TOLL that takes on somebody. Like they really think it’s okay to make you go about your day after having to practically talk somebody out of suicide. And then it turns out that wasn’t even the case :/ as an adult I realize how ODD it is that people do that shit at all, and to CHILDREN. I had a friend who did the same to me when I was in the 1D fandom and she was 20, I was only 13. I remember sending her Harry styles memes that were like “you’re worth it” and “you matter” like oh my god please go see a therapist I am a CHILD BRO 😭😭😭😭

I’m glad you finally cut her off and prioritized yourself and I hope you don’t cross paths with anyone like her again :( people like that will try to make you feel bad for cutting them off because they’re just mad about the fact that somebody was smart enough to see through their manipulative schemes and pull out of being involved. You deserve so much better and I also hope that she’s improved but I hope nobody has to go through that shit at the hands of her scheming ass 🙄 BYEEEEEE

ily pookie thank you for sharing this with me it’s not easy to talk about things like this but you’re doing amazing and you deserve the very best !! I love u and I hope u know that every time I think of you I think of that silly alien meme. SCHOOLK😈‼️‼️🫶

#puppy anon <3 #ask

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alivehouse · 1 year

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just wondering why you dislike Neil gaiman so much?? not trying to criticize or defend him, just curious

gghhhhh

(this is all just going to be based on good omens related stuff bc i havent really willingly interacted with any other work of his since i was like 12 he is not a great writer imo)

ok before i get into why specifically the way he uses his socials annoys me so much i just want to mention that good omens (tv show) has a serious problem with treating its characters of color poorly/as disposable (which this post goes into) and as far as i know neil has never so much as acknowledged this let alone apologize for it so theres that

but as for why i hate his social media presence specifically so much i just think the way he interacts with his fanbase is annoying & i dont want to use the term 'gaslighting' for something this stupid but i dont even know how else to describe his habit of like. pretending he wrote aziraphale and crowley in a relationship for the sake of clout?

^ he used to regularly regularly say condescending no homo shit like this but then when he realized he could get attention for pretending he wrote queer characters he pulled a 180 and started going 'ohhhh i DID write them in a relationship actually and also trans and also nonbinary i cant believe you didnt GET it just because its SUBTLE im sorry half assed vaguely subtextual scene #5 was not enough for you stupid fa- i mean people'

and he does this shit constantlyyyy and gets no flack for it. in fact a lot of his fanbase encourages it even bc were still stuck on begging for word of god scraps from rich straight men instead of engaging with work made by actual queer people i guess. (ALSO THIS TWEET SPECIFICALLY IS REALLY FUNNY bc like a month later he lied about there being a secret handholding scene in the show to send people on a wild goose chase zooming in on shit trying to find anything just to give him more streams i guess i dont know i think it was a stupid thing to even fall for honestly but it still strikes me as kind of cruel)

i mentioned this in tags before & idk if he still does this but he used to go look up his own name on here to find people talking negatively about him so he could reblog it and get them dogpiled which is why you see people talking negatively about him calling him 'neilman' so much instead of his actual searchable name. literal full grown man picking fights with random people on here bc he knows hell win since hes a famous author and will get backed up no matter what

and ok this is edging into fandom circlejerking (i think hes only said this one a few times but his fanbase brings it up constantly to shield him from any criticisms) so i wont go into this as much as i could but theres this Thing hell do where he says they cant be gay bc they technically arent men bc they arent humans (based on a bit in the book where they feel the need to specify that aziraphale is NOT ACTUALLY GAY after continuously subjecting him to homophobic language/aggression) and people will bend over backwards trying to interpret this as meaning they are canon nonbinary and Epic Trans Rep and hell vaguely encourage this instead of like acknowledging the extended man-in-a-dress evil nanny bit in the show and pointing out that it was fucked up? & honestly the whole undertone of that is like 'this character might go out of their way to look like and dress like and act like and refer to himself as a man but he cant REALLY be a man because he wasnt Created That Way' like how the fuck am i supposed to be treating this as a trans positive read of the situation lmao. not to mention the 'inhuman = nonbinary,' 'nonbinary = CANT be gay!!! there are no gay nonbinary people i guess' legwork going on here going on here i dont know its a whole mess

PLUS i just think its funny that hes said making characters gay would be disrespectful to his deceased cowriter but pulling an entire second out of his ass for that sweet amazon money apparently isnt lmao

and to finish this off just for fun heres him at the start of the pandemic when there was a crazy high rising death toll making it about his fucking book, + him answering another ask in response to that AFTER he had deleted the original post, to make the person asking him look like they were attacking him for no reason:

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victimofdiskjord · 11 months

Text

big rant abt my smr dr experience??? i think??? tw; sh

tbh tho at the time i was doing that shit i WAS um.. pretty (does that twirly finger thing around my head????) at the time of making those baitposts. I dont mind ppl finding my idenity now because ik thats just another annoying fuck i dont have to talk to.. ever! i just dont send it HERE cause.. well.. thats too easy <3 I thought that ppl were gonna harass me to no end, and tbh i DID get some.. really.. fucked up anons from just being annoying back then and ig i thought itd go to my fr account too. (racism, death threats, ableism, and MORE! this starter pack rocks!) Idk why people were so obsessed with finding my fucking dragon porn game identity though. like okay ???? #69837 aint my address dumbass... I joined this fr drama server because anons kept telling my (paranoid + rude ass) to go and shit it up cause "ppl were talking shit abt me" and i was like oh my god its time to catch HANDS!!!! i still hv an archive of the super duper dm-fight but.. the owner said "whatever goes in server stays there" so well. i calmly deleted the sses </3

idk why they were upset I uh. showed off their tag when they were fucking EXCITED to tell evryone mine, though...like i went "OH OH sorry, ill add it" and this dude was fucking shaking his hands jumping for joy to fucking do it for me. calm down butthead!!!!!!

i think a huge root of my rudeness and.. assholish attitude was my paranoia...and larp-craziness. i was scared for my damn life.. when i typed that shit up i was genuinely shaking n talking to myself for hours afterward Im still upset that people decided to take my thoughts of watning to send ppl my scars etc to face value, but tbh its fr. fr ppl are stupid. I was genuinely in a fucked up place and i was using making myself a "cringe, annoying troll punching bag" as coping mech.. when it was ACTUALLY making things worse.. and well. dr+smr people realllly didnt help. literally egging me on to continue to hurt myself and stuff in my inbox... people calling me a fucking evil person who sends people things ive never sent to anyone ever and never actually would.

people used me venting fucking AGAINST me and painted me as a villain when all i wanted was.. to make people laugh. but it turned into ppl laughing at ME, and not the jokepost.. people took my stop posting abt amongus copypasta so serious, got mad abt me wanting a stinky fujo coomer dragon npc.. list goes on.. i took pleasure in making ppl mad at me, but it also hurt a fuckton

i mean.. now i can laugh abt how much of a dumb bitch i was. nothing i posted since then has ever been that successful. or cringe. or annoying... lol.. some people has asked me to post again but.. idk. i just wanna be normal now. int with the people who havent blocked me yet.. ik thye hate me but i hope that one day they restalk my blog and decide to be neutral towards me again..

until then um..

dear anti anti exalters: YOU PISS ME THE FUCK OFF. oh yeah.. YOU KNOW WHO I AMMM, KAGURAA!

bye :)

0 notes

rainbowdanganronpaa · 1 year

Text

rainbowdanganronpa is over/inactive; please stop using any of my designs & artwork

to get it out of the way:

STOP ILLEGALLY SELLING MY ARTWORK AND DESIGNS.

STOP STEALING MY DESIGNS, ESPECIALLY FORCING MY AU CHARACTERS WHO ARE CANNONICALLY ASEXUAL INTO SEXUAL MEDIA OR CHANGING THEIR IDENTITIES.

STOP STEALING MY ARTWORK; DO NOT REUPLOAD IT ANYWHERE, ESPECIALLY PINTEREST. i dont care if you do it with credit or not, STOP REUPLOADING MY ARTWORK.

PLEASE do not make FANART of my designs, DO NOT WRITE FANFIC, and please DO NOT EVER COSPLAY MY DESIGNS. i dont know why you’d want to cosplay them anyway they look weird as hell.

TL;DR dont use my designs/art for anything and do not reupload it anywhere.

no fanart. no cosplay. no pfps or edits. no fanfic, especially. stop stealing my art work and designs, especially when you sell them on horrible quality merch. NO ONE has the rights to use any of my artwork/edits/designs/etc.

seriously i didnt think people would wanna steal damn scenekids edits so bad.

this might seem like im overreacting but ive genuinely had this happen dozens of times and almost took legal action several times against people illegally using my artwork and designs.

ALSO ESPECIALLY STOP SEXUALIZING MY KAZUICHI, GOD DAMN. YALL ARE WEIRD. IN MY AU HE IS ASEXUAL AROMANTIC. STOP CALLING HIM HOT AND SAYING YOU’RE GONNA BEAT OFF TO HIM. like seriously why would you post that ANYWHERE on the internet, let alone an scenekid aroace edit of kazuichi souda made by a teenager at the time? thats just weird like get a life dude

i wanted to leave this AU on a positive note but anyone who saw my other update post knows already. this is a very passionate response because i and other scene danganronpa fans have been dealing with this for over 3 years, along with general homophob!c harassment. very ironic considering this is danganronpa we’re talking about. for context, i will not be looking up anything under my au tags or anything relating to scene danganronpa again, so i will not see any of your messages or responses.

i am sick and tired of the continuous disrespect of the scene danganronpa community to my and other artists boundaries. you constantly reupload our artwork without permission, steal our designs, and illegal sell our artwork/designs, then spew some of the most vile insults when we point it out. this is an issue MULTIPLE scene DR fans have dealt with. i have absolutely no motivation or want to return to the community if you all continue to disrespect artists.

seriously, this is the scenekid danganronpa community, why is it so awful??? i just wanted to make funny scenekid edits for fun, now im sad i ever posted my art online, and have seen other artists wish the same. i also dont even like to consider myself a scenekid anymore considering their history of platforming horrible people and just generally being pretty disgusting, but thats a whole can of worms.

----

thank you to all the people who were respectful. when i was still active in our little community + the scenekid DR community as a whole, it was really cool. i was super into scene fashion at the time and it was fun meeting other scenekids who liked danganronpa, and had similar HCs to mine. it was really awesome whenever i posted a new edit and someone said “hey! ive been waiting for you to do this character :)” and actually made me tear up a few times. realistically its not that big of a deal, it was just cool seeing so many people genuinely appreciate my artwork, even if it was just badly done scenekid edits of danganronpa characters. i really loved seeing people make content /inspired/ by my edits and even say they wanted to cosplay them. while i dont have those feelings anymore, it was fun while it lasted. sorry if this seems really sappy and overly serious, im not sure how to write things casually, HaHa.

#rainbowdanganronpaa #i really hope this au can just fade into irrelevance #i thought it did till i found more stolen art of mine when i was looking at completely random artwork on pinterest #like all i can ask is for you all to leave me alone and stop using anything ive ever created #along with actually respecting other danganronpa artists. because this community definitely doesnt care about us now #artists in general

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pluviophile-imagines · 2 years

Note

i wanna see usurper!gojo's courting shenanigans plsplspls

in which gojo satoru, your beloved king and betrothed, knows his time is best spent in your company riling you up.

gojo satoru x fem!reader

word count: 2.5k genre: fluff, royal au, childhood friends to lovers type: one-shot reader: fem (she/her pronouns, fem terms, fem clothing including dresses) warnings: once again hes pushy n the reader's a lil bit hesitant but hed stop if she rlly wanted, vague references to violence note: see i was gonna do a few lil scenes but the first one got away from me.... but basically the period of him courting the reader (which full disclosure isnt technically courting bc that should be happening before one proposes but this occurs while theyre engaged bc Gojo Didnt Get That Memo but i digress) is just him being WILDLY inappropriate for cultural standards, everyone silently pitying the reader, and the reader having a whole ton of conflicting emotions but ultimately rlly liking it 😭😭😭

usurper!gojo tag || masterlist

he snickers. “how dramatic.”

“i know why they came to that conclusion,” you say. “you terrified me when i saw you.”

“did you think me inhuman?”

you hum, eyes tracing along the band of flowers now gracing his forehead, falling to rest on his hand over yours. “no. never. monstrous, perhaps. odious. but very human.”

“You mongrel,” you accuse with wide eyes and a hand on your heart as you work to steady your breathing. “Have you no respect for your future wife?”

“Ah, she admits it readily now? Progress.”

“Presumptuous,” you say. He'd die a happy man if you kissed him as many times as you called him that, but in lack of the former he’ll be content with the latter.

“Sit with me, my queen. I've missed you.”

“I am not yet your queen, Satoru,” you correct out of obligation. “You saw me an hour ago, we ate together.”

“Ah, but every moment apart is agony.” Satoru wonders if you know how serious he is beneath the breezy tone. From the way you wrinkle your nose, he doubts it.

“You have a meeting with your advisors now. You should not be out here.”

He pouts. “But you’re out here, and if I have to spend more time with those old fools than you today then I'll throw a tantrum tomorrow.”

“How do you see a thing through those,” you grumble lowly, certainly just to break yourself from being flustered. It works too well; Satoru immediately jumps on the chance you’ve given him.

“Would you like to try them?” he asks, but doesn’t wait for a response, mind already conjuring an image of you draped in every golden chain and precious stone gracing his chambers.

He snickers. “How dramatic.”

“I know why they came to that conclusion,” you say. “You terrified me when I saw you.”

“Did you think me inhuman?”

You hum, eyes tracing along the band of flowers now gracing his forehead, falling to rest on his hand over yours. “No. Never. Monstrous, perhaps. Odious. But very human.”

“You wound me. I might die by your cruelty.”

“Die, then.”

“I need…” he rasps out, barely audible.

You indulge him and do so. “My king?”

“…iss…”

“What?”

He yelps, just for you, just so you’ll feel accomplished. And so he can see your smile, hear the smugness in your voice as you say, “It’s a miracle, you’ve come back to life.”

“If I return to court with a crown of flowers made by my lover still on my head, do you suppose they’ll think me less inhuman?”

Your face falls at the suggestion, eyes widening in mortification. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“It's far more comfortable than that heavy gold. And I happen to personally adore the artisan who made it, so—”

“It'd be rude of me to refuse a gift, my queen.” Laughing, Satoru holds you back with ease, eager for the excuse to put his hands all over you while you’re too worked up to feel self-conscious.

“Not yet,” you wail. “Not your queen yet, you knave!”

“Mine either way, though,” he replies smugly with a playful tug to the chain you still wear. “Covered in my presents. It’s only fair that I get to display a token you’ve given me, no?”

It's the first time you’ve ever kissed him. He already plots how to push you into doing it again when he finally pulls away, eyes locked on your swollen lips.

#ask.🌧#anon #usurper!gojo #char.🌧 gojo #mine.🌧#gojo satoru x reader #jjk x reader #look at me remembering ALL the tags AND the warnings at the start go me im a good blogger #this is the last one btw!!! unless something rlly inspires me or i get into it again in a few weeks lmfaoooo

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eternallyhyucks · 2 years

Text

annoying things enhypen would do

pairing: enhypen x gn! reader

word count: 617

genre/warnings: fluff , none

—note: sorry for not writing in so long!! i have break soon, so hopefully ill be able to write then :)

— also these are all jokes, i mean no harm by anything i wrote here!!

𖤐 ྀ

heeseung

smirk all the time.

all the damn time.

have u guys seen that one video of him at a fansign🙄let me beat him up rq one sec😇/j

i can imagine him coming home after a while and you’re all excited to see him bc he’d been gone for so long

and when u go to hug him, hes all

“😏😏😏missed me😏😏😏”

BOY IF U DONT STFU

simply just walk away and he’ll run after u like “wait y/n😩i was joking ill pretend ur not obsessed w me”

u love him nonetheless

jay

buy too many things for you

i was watching hometown cha cha cha and this reminded me of the police guy buying the main girl’s friend a bunch of gifts LMAO

it would start off as cute and ur like “omg jay u didnt have to” and then hes like “it’s okay i like buying you things😁”

but then it’d be a random tuesday and he will pull out something you casually said u wanted 2 months ago and ur like ???????????

“jay why”

“u said u wanted it”

u have to give him a pep talk

“jay i love u AND will continue to even if u dont buy me so many gifts”

jake

laugh while ur trying to be serious

ive been thinking about this since niki did the heartbreak anniversary thing & jake broke into a smile for a second when niki got close to him LMFAO HELP

you could be telling him off for smthg and this mf would be like🙂

“LITERALLY WHY ARE U SMILING YOU BROKE THE OVEN JAKE”

“idk ur cute when ur mad”

u would wanna give him a nice punch in the face but also sit and give him a fat hug bc hes so freaking adorable

either way he’d win tbh

sunghoon

tease you

for everything.

similar to heeseung but instead smirking, he’d run away or dodge u if u go to hug him

i already know he’d be the type to lean in to kiss you and then smile and move away as soon as you lean into him

“oh my god u want me so bad”

“IM GONNA PUNCH YOU SO BAD”

“do it😏”

sunoo

hes too nice

it’s not annoying but sometimes u need someone to tell you that you look like an ugly rat but he wont do that

smfh sunoo

“hey how does this look”

“u look amazing as always☺️”

and u appreciate it but DAMN

at some point you’d do ur makeup ugly or dress in a weird and random combination just to see if he says anything

and he wont

so u yell at him to tell u when u look ugly so u dont walk out looking all gross

jungwon

outsmart u

with anything

he seems like the type to brag ab getting a 98 if u got a 92 but i feel like he would also end up helping or giving you answers later

he would also do ANYTHING to prove his point

you could be in an argument and he would end lives just prove that he’s right

just let him, he’ll never stop

niki

making ur mom jokes

at everything

i do this all the time so is it really annoying🤨🤨

“hey can u pass me the remote”

“ur mom passed me the remote last night😏”

“niki what does that even mean”

ur mom joke supremacy

©eternallyhyucks

TAGLIST!

@overthemoonbae , @yejicrossing , @baekswoons , @igsana , @renjunn1es , @junityy , @pr0dbeomgyu , @gyuuss , @sungsunnie , @fiantomartell , @wccycc , @jscvpid , @koishua , @changminurheart , @rainbowglitteramythyst

!! unable to tag bolded

—send an ask if you would like to be a part of my taglist!!

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kylie-writes-stuff · 3 years

Text

“wife”

pairing: corpse husband x reader (female)

words: 1,714

requested?: no (send some in tho pls :) )

plot/summary: felix invites his friend, y/n, to play among us when they need an extra player. her and corpse get along well

authors note: so this isnt that good and i know a lot of corpse fics use a similar plot. i just wanted to try to write for corpse. hopefully things i write for him in the future are better. let me know what you think tho! also i really wanted reader to be best friends with karl bc i love him sm. uh every swiggly line is like a small time skip. this was written late at night btw and i didnt take much time to go over it

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

You sat up from laying down when you heard your phone ring. You looked at the caller ID.

Felix.

"What's up Felix?" You ask with a small yawn.

"Aww, how sweet," You hear in the background.

You giggle and ask, "Is that Sean? Hi Sean!"

"Yeah, we're playing Among Us and need an extra player. You down?" Felix explained.

"Sure, just give me a few minutes. See you soon, whore"

"Bitc-" You hang up before he can finish.

You got up and turned off your TV, going to get ready.

⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒

You quickly tweet out that you're going live and say something on your insta story as well. You start your stream and slowly watch people flood in.

"Hey everyone! How are you guys doing?" You wave and smile, reading the chat.

"Everyone doing good, awesome! And i'm sorry to anyone having a bad day. I hope i can brighten it a bit!"

"Okay, sorry i didn't give you a further notice. I didn't even know i was gonna stream. Felix invited me to play Among Us so... here we are!"

You quickly join the discord and pull up the game, putting a cover over where the code goes.

"Hello?" You ask as you join the call. A chorus of greetings came your way.

"(Y/n)?"

"Karl!" You smile brightly.

Karl Jacobs was a good friend of yours. You would play on the Dream SMP sometimes. When you would, it would mostly be you being stupid with Karl and Alex, also known as Quackity. You were even a well know citizen of El Rapids.

"LET'S GOOOOO!" He yelled, making you laugh.

"Hey (Y/n), do you know everyone here?" Sean asks you.

"Um," You quickly scan through the names, "no, i don't think so."

You recognized names but you only personally knew Felix, Sean, Karl, and Ethan.

"Oh my god! Your voice is so cute!" Pokimane exclaims.

You giggle softly, "Thank you Poki!"

You're voice wasn't high pitched or anything like that, you just always spoke very softly and calmly. You were also a bit quiet.

Felix introduces you to those that you didn't know.

"There's one more person we're waiting for," He says.

While everyone waits, you and Karl run around each other's little characters and make jokes between yourselves. You mute yourself to read donations every once in a while.

You hear the discord chime, signaling that someone joined the call.

"WAIT CORPSE! DON'T SPEAK YET!" Felix yelled. "We have a new player. This is my friend (Y/n), say hi to her"

"Hello (Y/n)," Corpse said. You were taken aback by how deep his voice was but you didn't show it.

"Hi Corpse! Nice to meet you!" You said happily.

"Okay, how is she not freaking out?" Bretman said, making everyone laugh.

"Uh, (Y/n), do you mind letting me have black? It's cool if not.." Corpse asked gently.

"O-oh sure, no problem." You were usually black with the pink flamingo hat, but you ran over to the little computer and changed your color.

"Simp," Ethan mumbled, knowing you never switch from black.

"Thank you," He said, then the game started.

The word “Imposter” appeared on your screen in red, yours and Corpse's characters underneath.

As the game started, you thought no one could hear you so you spoke to your chat. "His voice was so deep, what the fuck? Holy shit that was hot, i'm gonna-"

"(Y/n)," Rae laughed, "You know we're playing proximity chat, right."

You blushed as you realized and said "Ha, anyways..." and ran to start faking tasks.

You ended up in electrical with Karl. "(Y/n)! My good friend, my buddy, you would never kill me right? Haha..." He said.

"Of course not, Karl! My good friend, my buddy. Why, I'm not even imposter," I said as i quickly dipped into the vent and back out, making him laugh.

I decided to show him because I knew Karl wouldn't say anything, and it's funny.

"Oh that's good then. Are you sure you're not imposter?"

"Mhm, pretty sure," You said, going back in. As you came out, Sykkuno walked in and froze.

"Uh, (Y/n)?"

"Fuck... Karl run! Go!" You said, Karl starting to leave. You walked closer and quickly killed Sykkuno then vented to security.

"That was close..." You told your chat.

You saw Corpse as you made your way around the map and walked into navigation.

"Hey, Corpse, how ya doing?"

"Ah you know, good. Just being crewmate and all."

You stifled a laugh, "Oh yeah I feel that, buddy."

"Yeah because there's no way that i'm imposter. No way i could be faking tasks and there's no possible way you could be the other imposter" He said quickly.

"For sure. Hypothetically speaking, though, if you were imposter, how many people would you have killed by now?"

"I would say probably around two."

"Interesting," You said right before a body was reported. It was Sykkuno's. Felix and Rae were also dead.

"WHAT!" Corpse yelled.

"Where was the body at?" Sean laughed.

"Uh I found it in electrical," Bretman said.

"I'm pretty sure Karl was in there earlier."

You calmly said, "It's not Karl, I was with him for most of the round."

"How do we know the two of you aren't imposters?" Sean asked.

"I was alone with him, he would have taken the chance to kill me."

"No, he's your best friend."

"He's also ruthless,"

"TRUE! SO TRUE!" Karl yelled.

"So skip?" Corpse asked.

Everyone agreed and the voting was skipped.

The next round, I spent with Ethan. He was pretending to be mad at me because Sean said Karl was my best friend.

"What happened to Blue Boi Buddies, huh?!" He exclaimed.

"Neither of our hair is even blue anymore!" You argued back.

You were in reactor with him when Corpse and Poki walked in. He hit the lights and you took it as a sign to double kill. He killed Poki, you killed Ethan, and the two of you made your way to electrical to help fix lights.

You and Corpse went the opposite direction of reactor after the lights were fixed, Karl going with you.

Poki's body was reported. That double kill only left you, Corpse, Sean, Karl and Bretman. You only needed two more kills.

"I still think it's Karl and (Y/n)," Sean said quickly.

"I was with (Y/n) the whole time," Corpse said, "In fact, I think it's you."

"That does make sense. Why so quick to accuse others, Sean?" You ask.

"It's not me!" He yelled.

"I actually agree with Corpse and (Y/n)," Bretman said.

"I was with you!"

We all voted for Sean, him voting for Karl. Sean was ejected.

When you load into spawn, you wait for the kill cool down and kill Bretman, saving Karl.

"Victory" appeared on your screen.

"God damn it!" Sean yelled.

"Good job, (Y/n)," Corpse said lowly.

You smiled, a slight blush on your cheeks, "You too Corpse."

"Their voices go together and they're a fuckin dream team? What have i done...," Felix sighed.

⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒

A few more games went by. Most of them you and Corpse spent together, whether you were both crewmates or if one of you was imposter.

You really enjoyed his company and you actually got along with him pretty well.

⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒

"(Y/n), before we get serious, I have one question to ask you." Corpse said as both of your characters stopped.

"What's that?" You giggled.

"Do you know Bingus?"

"Bingus? As in, our lord and savior, Bingus?"

You could hear the smile in his voice, "It's settled, you're my wife now."

This made both of you laugh and your chat go crazy.

⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒

Eventually, people had to start leaving. You said your goodbyes to everyone and left the discord call and the game.

You set stream to where it was just your face cam.

"Guys, what should we do now?"

You saw some people asking what time it was for you.

"It's 3 AM right now... I’m not tired though.” You had been streaming for a few hours; You never even noticed how late it got.

People in chat were yelling at you to go to sleep, making you chuckle.

“How about we do a quick QnA, then at 3:30 I go to bed. Deal?”

You watched as the chat filled with questions. They obviously seemed to like the idea.

“‘Who is your best friend? Karl or Ethan?’ Neither, Alex Quackity. Next question.” You answered quickly.

You laughed, “I’d like to clarify that that’s a joke, i love all my friends equally.”

You answered more questions. Some were from new viewers asking basic questions, some were about future streams and videos.

“‘How do you feel about people shipping you and Corpse?’“ People are already shipping us?” You laughed, “I’ve said before that I’m okay with shipping, as long as the other person is too. I think it’s funny.”

You continued to read chat. “Wait, we’re trending?”

You checked Twitter and “#(your and corpse’s ship name)” was trending in the US.

You laughed as you scrolled through the tag, “Oh this is so funny.”

“Fanart already?! You guys are so talented!”

You read chat, looking for more questions. You saw people telling you that it’s 3:30.

“Okay fine, a deal’s a deal. I hope you all have, or had, a great day and I’ll see you guys later. Depending on what time it is for you, you should also get some sleep. Stay hydrated, love you!” You ended stream.

⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒

You scrolled through Twitter as you laid in bed, liking fanart and dumb memes. Also replying to a few of your friends’ tweets.

karl :) @/KarlJacobs_

@/(your username) what the honk ?

*clip of you saying Quackity was your best friend*

You liked the tweet and replied, “karl no,,, look away,,,”

You continued scrolling, feeling your eyes get droopy. Your eyes fell closed but quickly opened when your phone vibrated. It was a DM.

From Corpse.

You two had followed each other earlier.

Corpse: hey (y/n), just wanted to say you’re really cool and i’d love to play again with you soon

You smiled, a light blush spreading across your cheeks, and replied.

You: i’d love to, corpse

Corpse: ok, see you soon ‘wife’

You: back at ya, ‘husband”

Corpse: :)

You: :)

#corpse #corpse husband #corpse x y/n #corpse x you #corpse x reader #corpse imagines #corpse fanfic #uh #corpse husband x reader

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venicebixch · 2 years

Text

Breaking Rules part 3

angst in this one! enjoy.

edit: I DIDNT MEAN TO POST THIS YET LOL. I had it in a queue and edited it last night and accidentally posted it and just woke up at saw. oh well, too late now. i think it was ready but still. ugh. i didn’t even add the tags yet lol.

We get dressed and head back out to the seating area of the plane. Jorge is still snoring away.

I look at Vinnie and giggle as we sit back down. He shakes his head smiling.

—

Once the plane lands, Vinnie gets a phone call.

“Hello?” He answers.

I can’t hear what’s being said but he gets a concerned look on his face and sighs.

“Are you serious? We can’t just use another gate?” He put his hand over his eyes. “Okay. Well, get us some back up. We’ll deboard when you’re ready.”

He hangs up the phone and looks at me, shaking his head.

“What’s going on?” I ask.

“There’s a god damn frenzy of people waiting at the gate. Word got out you’re coming through. We’re definitely gonna need more than me and Jorge.”

My heart rate picks up, and my anxiety kicks in. I hate when this happens. I don’t mind some attention but big crowds get crazy. It’s almost too much to handle.

“Did you hear that, Jorge?” Vinnie asks, looking over at him.

Jorge nods and gives a thumbs up. “We’ll be ready for them.”

After a few minutes, Vinnie gets another call saying they’re ready for us.

“Alright, let’s go,” he says.

We get off the plane and walk to the hallway. I can already hear yelling. Even though we’re inside I put my sunglasses on partly because the flashes are overwhelming but mostly because I’ll be damned if they get a picture of me worth a dime.

Several airport security officers are lined up down the hall. A few move to the front, a few move to the side of me and behind. Vinnie stands directly to my left to guide me through the chaos that’s coming.

As we turn the corner, the yelling picks up and people crowd the doorway making it impossible to push through.

One of the officers starts physically pushing through people. “Get back! Make room, let us through!” He yells.

People are completely crowded around us, everyone is pushed up against each other. I can’t even see where I’m going. I just follow the officers in front of me.

Someone accidentally steps on my shoe and I stumble backwards, almost falling and Vinnie catches me by my arm, keeping me standing. I grip his arm for dear life as we keep pushing our way forward. I don’t want to lose him.

“Y/n, how are you feeling after your breakup with Preston?” One of the paparazzi yells out.

“Y/n, did you have fun in New York?” Someone else yells.

I keep my head down, ignoring them.

We finally make it through the doorway and start heading through the airport. The crowd feels like it never ends, it just keeps growing as we pass more people. The camera flashings are nonstop.

Out of the corner of my eye I see someone lunge toward me and I instinctually step back. The guy falls to the ground on his knees and reaches up to the waistline of my pants as if he’s trying to pull them down.

“Get off of me!” I say trying to push him back. Vinnie sees what’s happening and comes around and grabs the guy by his shirt collar, pushing him down and pinning him to the ground with his knee on his head.

“The fuck do you think you’re doing, creep?” He asks the guy, angrily.

“Please, I just want to see her,” the guy says, staring up at me with his face against the floor. I look away, not wanting to give him any more ideas or fucking delusions.

“Don’t ever fucking touch her,” Vinnie says, leaning on the guy more.

The guy tries to stand and starts to wrestle Vinnie and Vinnie grabs the guy, pulling his arms back.

I keep getting pushed forward, but I’m worried about Vinnie. I don’t want him to get hurt or get into a serious fight.

“Stop!” I yell out trying to stop myself from being pushed but people aren’t listening. I feel helpless.

I look back as Vinnie disappears from my sight and tears start to well in my eyes but I shake my head. I can’t cry right now.

I feel myself start to panic but take a deep breath. Vinnie knows what he’s doing. I have to trust that.

2 other officers surround me in his place and we eventually make our way to the car. I keep looking back for any sight of him but he’s no where to be found.

“I’m not leaving until Vinnie is with me,” I demand as they open the car door.

“Who?” One of the officers ask.

“Vinnie! One of my guards! He fucking had to tackle someone back there and he’s still not here, I’m not leaving until he’s with me and I know he’s okay. He always rides with me.”

The officer shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “At least get in the car until he’s here.”

I cross my arms to protest but the crowd keeps gathering, relentlessly and I finally give in and get in.

“Where to?” The male driver asks, looking back at me.

“I’m not leaving until Vinnie is here.”

He looks at me confused but nods and looks forward again, waiting. People are knocking on the windows and still keep trying to take pictures.

After what feels like forever, I finally see him push his way through the crowd making his way to the car. He’s barely able to open the car door. When he does, someone sticks a camera in and takes a few shots of the inside of the car.

Vinnie pushes him back, hard. “Get the fuck outta here! You assholes treat her like she’s a fucking circus animal,” he yells.

He’s finally able to make his way into the car and slams the door shut behind him. He looks at me and has a scratch down the side of his face and neck and his shirt looks like it’s been pulled and stretched out around the collar.

“Are you okay?” I ask, tears falling down my face.

“I’m fine, don’t you worry about me,” he says, looking out the window. “I swear! These people are literal animals. Feral fucking beasts, I don’t get it.”

I sigh and take my sunglasses off, covering my face with my hands and wiping the tears away before anyone sees.

“Where to?” The driver asks again.

“208 Bell Canyon Road in Bell Canyon,” I say.

The driver starts moving forward but people are standing in front of the car. He lays on the horn a few times and finally they start moving back.

“Are you okay?” Vinnie asks, looking at me.

“Yeah, I was just worried about you. You have a scratch down your face, you’re bleeding,” I reach into my purse and grab an alcohol swab.

He looks at me confused.

“What?” I ask.

He starts laughing.

“What? Why are you laughing? Is my makeup messed up?”

He starts laughing harder and I smack his arm gently. “What, you fruit loop? What are you laughing at?”

“Did you really just come in clutch with an alcohol swab? Who carries these casually?” He asks.

I scoff and then giggle. “I stay prepared,” I shrug. “I’ve also got bandaids, hair ties, mouthwash, tampons. You name it, I got it.”

He lays his head back on the seat still laughing.

“You should be thanking me instead of laughing at me,” I say, rolling my eyes playfully. “Do you want me to clean you up or do you wanna risk a staph infection on that pretty face of yours?”

”Clean me up,” he says, still smiling. “You’re such a mom.”

“It’s called planning, buddy. Look it up.”

“Actually I think it’s called anxiety,” he smirks.

I laugh. “That too.”

I lean over and push his hair back, gently grabbing his face and guiding it to where I can see the scratch to clean it.

“There,” I say. “I just saved you from a terrible, life threatening infection.”

“You practically saved my life,” he says sarcastically, smiling.

I smile. “Mhmm. We’re even now.”

“Actually I think I’ve still got like 9 more instances of me saving your life but… who’s keeping count?”

“It’s not a competition,” I give him a pouty face.

He rolls his eyes and smiles. “Yeah, yeah. You wouldn’t say that if you were winning.”

—

We finally pull up the my house. I type in the code on the keypad at the gate and we pull into the driveway.

I see Preston’s car at the end, waiting.

“Oh shit,” I say quietly. I know it’s terrible but I forgot all about him tonight.

“Is that who I think it is?” Vinnie asks, looking at me.

“Yeah,” I sigh.

“Is he bothering you? Cause I was serious about killing him. Just ask.”

“No, his grandma died this morning and he wants to see me. I told him that’s fine. I just feel like he needs closure.”

He scoffs. “Right.”

I look at him confused.

“I’m sorry his grandma died, but you know he’s just going to use that as an excuse to weasel his way back in your life,” he says.

This made me upset. “What am I supposed to do? Tell him it’s too damn bad and I know we dated for 2 years but you can deal with this on your own?”

“Yeah,” he nods. “That’s exactly it. He has friends and family to lean on. Set boundaries and keep them. He’s a manipulator and a liar and a cheater.”

I get angry. “Don’t tell me about my relationships. If I want to see him, I’m going to. You don’t understand.”

“No, you don’t understand. As an outsider with a different perspective, I clearly see what he’s doing and who he is. You’re too forgiving and too tolerant.”

“Better than being cold hearted and miserable,” I say, getting out and slamming the car door.

I immediately regret leaving like this but I keep walking. I don’t have the energy tonight.

Preston gets out of the car as I’m walking toward him. He looks drained like he’s been crying all day.

“Hey,” I say softly as we walk up to my front door and head inside.

“Hey,” he smiles.

We walk inside and he walks to the living room, sitting down.

“Can you I get you anything?” I ask.

“No, I’m okay. Do you have that polo shirt?”

“Yeah, let me go get it,” I say and walk to the laundry room.

“I washed it for you,” I say sitting it down in front of him.

“Thank you.”

“How are you today? How’s your family?”

“We’re okay,” he says. “I guess we expected it sooner or later but it still sucks.”

I nod. “I understand,” I say as I sit next to him.

He stares at the floor for a moment before he starts crying.

“Preston…” I scoot over and start rubbing his back.

“I just love you and miss you so much,” he says.

“Preston, you know I have love for you. I care about you. But we’re through. It can’t be undone. My trust is broken.”

“I’m just so sorry. I was just going through so much with my grandma. I should have never cheated on you. I’ll regret it until the day I fucking die,” he covers face with his hands.

I feel the urge to hug him.

Was I too harsh on him? Maybe I shouldn’t have left him. He broke my fucking heart but he was dealing with a lot. Maybe it was a mistake.

“Preston -“ I start to say.

He looks at me and suddenly grabs me, kissing me.

I kiss him back for a moment then pull away. “Preston, stop.”

He kisses me again and pushes himself on top of me, laying both of us down on the couch.

“Preston, we can’t do this,” I try to push him back.

“Please. Just one more night. That’s all I want with you, just one more night to savor,” he rests his forehead against mine.

I’ve already been with Vinnie twice in the last 24 hours. I can’t.

I shake my head no. “I can’t,” I whisper.

“Please,” he begs. “Please, you take my pain away and make me feel okay. I need it tonight then I’ll never bother you again.”

I feel a sense of guilt no matter how I look at it. If I sleep with him, I feel bad because I was just with Vinnie. If I don’t, I have to send Preston home like this.

I sigh. “I guess you can stay here tonight. But we aren’t going to have sex,” I say quietly. “Come upstairs with me.”

We go upstairs and change into more comfortable clothes. We get into bed and he wraps his arms around me.

He quickly falls asleep. I lay there feeling the gentle rise and fall of his chest. I miss him. And I do love him. But honestly I wasn’t very happy with him before. And I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to trust him again. If he cheated during one hardship, he’ll cheat in the next. And there will always be another struggle. That’s the way life is.

#vinnie #vinnie hacker #vincenthacker #vinniehacker #vincent hacker #vinniehackerfanfic #vinniehackerimagines #vinnie hacker fanfic #vinnie imagines #vinnie x reader #vinnie hacker imagines #vinnie fanfic

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shhh-no-ones-home · 3 years

Text

heavy cross to bear* matt Murdock x reader

+++++++++ Request @juniebugg: reader and Matt are in a very serious relationship (could be married) but then when reader actually sees Elektra, whom she already knew about but has never seen because she was "dead," she gets really insecure and tells matt that he deserves better or something and he reassures her. Angst and smut"

hopefully its not too ooc this is my first MM smut so i hope you like! and thanks again for the request!!

* - you asked for smut and that really is all this is lol, little bit of story.

Song: wasted time by skid row

tag list: @cynic-spirit @juniebugg

+++++++++

i sat at the table sipping coffee and thinking. it was almost nine at night and i knew i should be getting ready for bed but my body wasn't quite ready to move yet. when matt disappeared into our bedroom i figured he'd be changing into daredevil for the millionth time but when he emerged in his pajamas i was a little surprised. and then it hit me. maybe he knew. hell, he always knew.

but maybe it was just that something was off, that i needed him to say it again, to stay with me and make sure i knew. but then there was her. she had showed up out of nowhere and took me off guard more than anything else up until now. one more doubt at the forefront of my mind. that i didnt believe him when he said he loved me despite being married for a year, despite having dated for three before hand, and despite everything he has done to keep me safe. because he loved her first and it felt like the biggest lie ive ever been told. even after a couple days of sitting on it and hoping it would go away. still it was there. in the back of my mind:

"matt i dont know if i can do this anymore."

his head tilted to the side and he looked confused.

"do what?"

he asked almost worried, moving slowly to the table and sitting.

"this, us. i just- you deserve so much more, so much better than- well, than me."

he was quick to scoot his chair closer to my own, his hand coming to rest on mine.

"hey, dont even say that. what would make you think i would want anyone but you?"

now he absolutely sounded worried.

"i saw her matt."

"saw who?"

i shook my head.

"that woman, your ex. you said she was gone."

"elektra?"

he sounded a little broken.

"shes something else ill give her that much. i see why you like her."

he swallowed hard.

"elektra is dead."

i shook my head.

"then why was she here? looking for you. saying your name with such... god i dont even know how to explain it. matthew."

i repeated it exactly as she had said it and it felt wrong. like i was acting. saying someone elses emotions and intentions. they were no longer mine. or at least it seemed like it. There was a long silence and I just stared at him.

"She was here?"

There was hope in his voice and I figured that was it. It made me angrier than it probably should've and my only response was to stand and walk away. I got half way across the living room before he caught my arm.

"Y/n, that doesn't matter. I-"

He swallowed hard and I tried to study his face.

"You mean more to me than anything. Yes I love, loved, her but I married you. I chose you. I want nothing more than to be with you. For better or for worse remember?"

He bargained and I sighed heavily.

"How can I be sure you mean that? What if she comes back? again."

He shook his head, taking both my hands in his and stepping closer to me.

"Let me prove it to you. If she really is back then it doesn't matter. I'm with you, I love you, and I'll always chose you."

I closed my eyes, feeling him get closer and closer until his forehead was against my own.

"We belong together."

He whispered before kissing me gently.

"I only want you."

He kept just as quiet, kissing next to my mouth once, then twice, making his way across my cheek and to my jaw.

"Matt."

I breathed out and he paused. I licked my lips lightly before opening my eyes and looking at him. He really did seem like he meant it. He was trying so hard to keep it together.

"I can't lose you."

He sounded so broken.

"Do it."

He drew his brows and I brought my hand up to touch his face gently. We were still so close I could feel his breath fanning my neck.

"Show me you mean it."

I said softly and his Expression changed.

"I love you so much."

He said before kissing me harshly, releasing my hands and pressing his fingertips into my hips. I hummed against him as he walked us backwards. We stumbled along as he pulled my shirt up, tossing it to the floor.

"Matt."

I moaned, pulling his shirt up next. It was gone in a second and he was back, kissing me and moving quickly to get my pants down. His hands roamed my body just as much as mine roamed his. I traced my fingers slowly up his torso, grazing over his scars before wrapping my arms around his neck. I gasped when he picked me up. There was a soft laugh that escaped him and I was relieved to see him smile even if it was just a second. He knew it would take some convincing and he was right. I needed to know he meant it. That Elektra wasn't gonna be a problem.

"I need you."

He whispered again, laying me gently on the bed and situating himself between my legs.

"I need you to know how much I mean it."

He kissed my jaw slowly, then down my neck and across my collar bone.

"Prove it."

I challenged, my breath hitching in my throat as he ripped my bra open from the front, his lips grazing my nipple before taking it into his mouth. He hummed against me, his finger tips down my torso and into my panties.

"Matt."

I moaned, dropping my head back as he ran his finger up me and against my clit. i closed my eyes, pushing my head back into the bed as he stroked me, kissing his way back up to my exposed neck.

"i love you."

he repeated against the heat of my skin. when he resituated i could feel how hard he was already.

"i need you."

i breathed out, pressing my hips up into him as he continued to finger me.

"matt."

i whined, him removing his hand long enough to pull my panties down. i looked up to him with lust blown eyes, watching him intently as he got rid of his boxers.

"youre still okay with this?"

he asked and i nodded quickly, pulling his face to mine and kissing him deeply.

"please."

i moaned, inhaling deeply before he kissed me again, pushing his hips into mine. my breath caught in my throat as he pushed all the way into me, catching my bottom lip between his teeth as my mouth hung open.

"i wanna hear you."

he said softly.

"feel you."

he moaned against my shoulder, dropping his head to the crook of my neck as he placed his large palm over my heart. it was already banging at my rib cage begging to be let out but i could have swore it did when he started moving. he pulled out of me slowly before slamming back into me and i moaned so loudly i was surprised at myself. and then he did it again and again, getting a good rhythm. it was long, and hard. nothing like our nights prior, even on his worst of days when he's frustrated and in need of release. no this was different. purposeful.

"matt."

i held onto him for dear life, pressing my fingertips into his shoulder blades as he continued to pound into me in long drawn out strokes.

"tell me. tell me what you want."

he grunted out, trying to sound as steady as possible.

"i want you. god i only want you!"

i cried out as he thrusted upward harshly. then he did it again and i saw stars, my mouth falling open as i moaned.

"thats my girl."

he praised, trailing his hand down my torso and pressing his finger in circles against my clit.

"youre almost there."

he coaxed, building me up. i could feel the tightness building, pressing my hips up to meet him as he kept his pace.

"im so close."

i panted, pressing my finger tips harder into his bicep as i gripped onto him.

"do it, do it for me, let go."

he said softly and i snapped. my orgasm racked through my body and my vision went blurry. i was breathing hard as he rode out my high, still chasing his own.

"im almost there."

he said, squeezing his eyes shut. he moved to pull out but i wrapped my legs tightly around his waist.

"y/n?"

he asked surprised and i leaned up to kiss him.

"just do it."

i said, pressing a hard kiss to his neck. he kept going, knuckles going white against the bedsheets as he came in me with a loud groan.

"oh my god."

he panted, slowing his thrusts.

"i love you oh my god."

he said, dropping to his forearms, trying not to put his full weight on top of me. my legs were still wrapped tightly around his torso as we both calmed down.

"i love you too matty."

i said softly, feeling him nuzzle his nose against my neck. it made me giggle a little bit and i could feel him smiling against my skin before kissing it gently.

"you have no idea how relieved i am to hear that. youre the only one for me. always will be."

i sighed softly in content, kissing his forehead and dropping my legs.

"im sorry i doubted you. i just. i need a reminder every once in a while i guess."

he kissed my chest before pulling out of me and dropping to the bed beside me.

"i will give you as many reminders as you need, as long as we both shall live."

he said, taking my hand in his and kissing the back of it.

"thank you matt. thank you for everything. especially knocking some sense into me."

he raised a brow, a half smirk on his face and i immediately wondered what was going through that mind of his.

"after tonight sense might not be the only thing i knocked into you."

i couldnt help but laugh, him matching it as i rolled onto his chest.

"i know you want nothing more than to tell the father we're finally starting that catholic family with lots and lots of beautiful babies but i still have my iud."

he let out a short laugh sigh before i kissed him quickly.

"but that doesnt mean i couldnt be persuaded into getting it taken out."

he raised an intrigued brow.

"oh?"

i laughed lightly.

"ill think about it. right now i just wanna live in this moment with you."

i said the last bit through a yawn, resting my head against his chest and hearing his heartbeat.

"i love you."

he whispered, earning a hum from me as i dozed off.

#wattpad #x reader #337 #matt murdock #smut #daredevil #marvel #imagines #one shots #requests

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