#I'm so happy I get to call you my friend <3<3

[14dayswithyou]

💖 Day 3.5 is now available! 💖

For the last couple of months, only Server Boosters had access to the 3.5 update... Buuuuut now it's available for everyone to play in the 14DWY Discord — and soon itch.io once I'm happy with the QA and state of the game — so please don't feel pressured to join unless you want to!!

The full devlog + even more screenshots are under the cut ^^

What's been added to the 3.5 version?

📺 Streamer Mode!

I've been told that it's difficult to stream and monetise age-restricted videos on YouTube and Twitch, so I added an option to remove the sexual content and strong language used in the demo.

Now y'all can invite Ren into your bed for cuddles without putting your streamer career on the line /silly /lh

This won't affect the 18+ rating or dark themes/elements of the game, however! Although Streamer Mode will prevent you from seeing any "gruesome" CGs in the future, most of the core elements of the game will still be tied to the choices and decisions you make. So you won't miss out on the overall experience by using streamer mode!!

⚙️ Custom Pronouns!

It only took me one entire year to get around to it, but you can finally choose your own preferred pronouns (or use a set of pronouns instead)... At the cost of being able to change them mid-game ^^;

Since the original pronoun screen wouldn't update until a new scene was displayed, I temporarily disabled the feature. But once I find a workaround, I'll bring it back!

💗 Choose how others perceive you!

You can now choose how the cast and narration perceive you! Originally, the narration was kept strictly gender-neutral (outside of pronouns and genitalia picked by the player), but this will soon change in future updates.

For more clarity: you don't get to choose the words specifically, but you can choose between masculine, feminine, and androgynous terms!

📋 Separate top and bottom genitalia!

You can now choose your tatas and pps separately! >:3

Alongside that, you can also choose your preferred body type!

I removed the "both" genitalia option because a few players still assumed it was an obscure version of "intersex". That wasn't my intention and I don't want to mislead anyone, so I took it out for now ^^;

I also didn't want to include a screenshot of the new genitalia choices in action (because it's NSFW), so y'all get the same character menu screen for the nth time instead lmao

📱 Relationship Screen Overhaul!

You can now change your own status for more immersion, and long-term Server Boosters will eventually be able to submit and use their own icon within the game as well!

Stalking finding your friends has now become easier by using "Buddy Maps"; a new app that allows you to see the location of all the cast members!

I want to offer players more incentive to check the relationship screen since they tend to miss the status updates, so hopefully this might help ;v;

It also says it "updates every few hours" so folks don't go overboard and check every 5 seconds to see where Ren is gdsghf (also keep in mind that he's a hacker lol)

🖤 Additional Scenes Update!

Day 2 received a brand new CG!!!!! Originally, I planned on only adding a few CGs sporadically throughout the game, but it didn't feel right to leave Day 2 so... empty... so I added a brand new CG to (hopefully) make things feel more balanced and natural!

If you decline Teo's offer on Day 3, Leon will now call and try to convince you to reconsider. However, players are still allowed to decline, and if they do, they'll reach a dead end.

After listening to feedback on itch, I changed some of the dialogue during Days 1-3 to make it seem more consistent! They're only small changes though, so it's honestly not worth looking for sdgjssga

🎶 Updated BGM and SFX!

I wanted to try out a different style of music to see if it fits the vibe of 14DWY more! The BGM features more acoustics to suit the "beachy" theme of Corland Bay, though I made a conscious effort to include piano elements as well to stay true to the original!!

I figured it'd be better to give players a live example before I make a poll (to see if they prefer the change or not) and publish it to Itch.

Some new SFX have also been added, though it's very minimal and honestly not that noticeable.

How to download and play the update?

(warning: clicking on the following links will open Discord!!) To download the Day 3.5 update, simply join the 14DWY Discord server, verify your age, and visit the "14dwy-updates" channel!

Alternatively, you can also wait until the update is publicly released on Itch to play it as well!! (It normally gets released shortly after a round of QA testing/getting feedback from the server, though I may release it earlier if I feel like it hehe ^^)

Enjoy!!

#14 days with you #14dwy #💖 — 14 days with queue. #🖤 — updates. #🖤 — spoilers. #I'm not gonna say much about my current doxxing situation because I've got it under control now + it's being handled privately #Plus I don't wanna give it/the people involved any unnecessary attention. I just wanna announce the update and Get Back To It™️ #(''it'' bein the grind 💪 It never stops lmao /silly) #OG followers will also know that these topics aren't the vibe I normally have on this blog (or any of my accounts); so I don't think I'll— #—make ANOTHER public post about the situation and bring more attention to it (when I just want everything to be over and put to rest ^^;) #However I also don't want people to think that I'm... ignoring?? the situation entirely (because gettin doxxed is a very endangering thing) #So I DO want to quickly acknowledge it here and say that it's all currently handled + I'm safe and okay + this won't stop me from— #—continuing to work on 14DWY (and other future projects). I also don't want to give these awful people more power and incentive to continue #—this kind of pathetic behaviour; so the less attention and encouragement being shown will ultimately be better in the long run :3 #Aaaaaanways!! 😮‍💨 #My other accounts will be restored shortly and my askbox will be opened once I feel comfortable. I'll get around to following folks— #—again in my own time; so please don't feel offended if I unfollowed you during a moment of vulnerability and anxiety!! #This is all EXTREMELY overwhelming and scary for someone with SAD/AvPD; and I /gen can't handle seeing it all over my timeline ;v; #Sorry this got ranty and personal again hjdsgjsdh T_T I said I wouldn't say much; so I'll shut up now hehe #🖤 — shut up sai.

[screamingatanemptyroom]

The Healer Pt 4

The story continues. I'm still enjoying this one, so we'll keep going!

Part 1 / 2 / 3 linked here. (If I get to 5+ parts I'll make a master post)

Enjoy!

___________________________

ONE YEAR EARLIER

“Natalie! You’re here!”

Jack shouted with excitement when he saw me. Garrett and Rita trailed behind him, their expressions happy, if a bit mild and unenthused. I was still sitting on the ground, catching my breath after my first battle in this strange world. The corpses of the monster flowers had faded into the grass, leaving little evidence of my fight behind. I waved to them, feeling a strong sense of relief in seeing familiar faces.

The three of them had been my teammates in Fantasy Realm, even if they weren’t the kindest people I had ever known. While playing together they were often inpatient with me, unforgiving of mistakes, and constantly pushing me to spend more time and money improving my character when they knew I had very little of both. I had always given in, and disliked myself for doing so, hoping it would improve their opinion of me, knowing deep down it wouldn’t. I might call them friends… and I would be shocked if they called me the same.  But after waking up in this weird real world of the game, I was just happy to know anyone at all.

I was afraid to be alone.

The group reached me, and with a grin, Jack reached out and helped me to my feet. I brushed the dust off of myself and looked them over. They all looked like they had in our old world, the only difference was their clothing. Jack was dressed in leather armor, reinforced my metal along the chest and back. Garrett had a large sword strapped across his back, with scant coverings over the rest of his enormous frame. Rita had a simple cloth robe and a large wooden bow.

“We all chose our familiar classes.” Jack saw my studying look and informed me. “Seemed the safest thing to do given that we don’t know what happens if you die in here.”

Rita rolled her eyes. “I can’t believe you guys are taking this seriously! This can’t be real. We're still in the game! It’s just some hoax, someone hacked the game. Eventually my dad will tear the VR company apart, sue them into oblivion and then we’ll be let out!”

I paused at that. “We weren’t playing the game when this happened though.”

“We just forgot.” She answered forcefully, her gaze annoyed as usual as she met my own.

Rita had always disliked me. Our parents knew each other, her father was a well-known lawyer who had pushed her to follow in his footsteps. As someone who had struggled with the weight of parents’ expectations, I sympathized. But she had quit law school after a week, turning to full time gaming instead. She didn’t do well enough to make any money, but fortunately her mother paid her bills.

Her father was disapproving to say the least. He apparently used me as an example to her of someone successfully “taking over the family business,” never mind that I hated the pressure, resented my parents’ strict expectations and escaped whenever possible. It didn’t matter. Rita despised me, and no attempts from myself or from Jack could smooth the rift between us.

Garrett looked me over from head to toe, confused. “You don’t have a weapon.”

I froze at his words. Garrett had a large sword, obviously a barbarian type class. Jack had a one-handed sword, a fighter or swordsman. Rita was an archer with her bow. But me…

There was only was class in the game that couldn’t use weapons.

“No…” Rita started laughing, so hard that tears were forming in her eyes. “No… you DIDN’T do something so STUPID….!”

Garrett was shaking his head, frowning disapprovingly. I ignored them, my entire attention was on Jack. We had been friends since freshman year of college. He had helped me find my first class, I tutored him in chemistry. We had supported each other through ups and downs, told each other about our fears and dreams…  

And he was looking at me with hatred in his eyes.

“You are a Healer.” His voice was quiet, but the lack of emotion in his tone made my hackles raise. I started to back away.

“Jack… I…”

His hand gripped my throat, and I was lifted off the ground. I gasped, unable to get air, and struggled against him, but with a strength stat of -10 I knew there wasn’t much hope. I wouldn’t be able to cast my healing spells either, without being able to speak the activation word.

I need to be able to cast without speaking. My brain focused on that, almost desperately avoiding dealing with the situation I was currently in: My friend was killing me.

**The Healer enters an early hypoxic state - 10 damage for each second that airway compression remains in place. **

**The Healer takes 10 damage. **

I had only seconds to live.

** The Healer takes 10 damage**

I grabbed his hand, focusing all my desperation into the need to cast my only spell: Small Incision.

** Through sheer force of will, The Healer has discovered Wordless Incantation**

**The Healer casts Small Incision. Jack the Hero takes 1 damage.**

As the messages floated across my vision, Jack yelped in pain, clutching his bleeding hand, dropping me to the ground. I laid still for a few moments, focusing on breathing, the pain of my neck and in my lungs a reminder of what had just occurred. I stared up at Jack, hoping to see remorse on his face.

There was nothing but rage.

“How DARE you pick a useless class like healer?” He snarled, holding pressure on his hand to stop the bleeding while staring down at me. “Our lives could depend on doing well in this game, and you seriously chose a class with minimal fighting potential, whose healing abilities are worse than any potion that can be purchased in a shop?”

He stepped closer, and I flinched back, my heart beating wildly. “You are so obsessed with your parents’ disapproval, that even in a life-or-death situation you had to pick being a doctor? Are you really so messed up?”

I opened my mouth to explain. I knew this class well, the strengths and weaknesses. I could use it to the team’s benefit. I had been a good teammate, one of the reasons we had placed so highly in the last tournament. I wanted to say all this and more.

But as I stared into the disappointment in his eyes, I felt myself slipping into old habits. Of staying quiet and nodding. Of keeping the peace and letting myself take the blame. I hated it, despised myself for it… but kept silent all the same.

“Should we just leave her behind?” Rita asked, giving no concern to me as I struggled to catch my breath after Jack’s strangling attempt. “She’s useless after all.”

“She used to provide good support.” Garrett spoke up. “We can keep her on the team until we find someone more useful…”

“I am not giving a spot on our team to a healer.” Jack closed his eyes and rubbed his temples for a moment, as if trying to calm himself down. Finally, he looked down at me coldly. “You can tag along with our team, without an official spot. You will do your best to be useful. Otherwise, we will leave you to die.”

Leave them! My heart screamed at me. Being alone is better than this! You didn’t commit some great sin by becoming a Healer! You just chose the best you could! Tell them!

Slowly, I nodded. “Fine.” My voice was still hoarse from the pressure he had placed on my throat. I adjusted my tone with the ease and familiarity of practice. “I’ll follow along.” I pushed the screaming voice in my head back, along with my pride. I knew I was worthless, a failure. I had been told that every day by the two people on the planet who were supposed to love me the most. Jack was only the latest person to say it out loud.

This was what I deserved.

The first month passed quickly. We went on multiple quests together, and settled into a comfortable rhythm. Jack would take the lead, with Garrett beside him to tank. Rita picked off far away opponents, and supported from the back. And I…

I did everything I could.

Outside of fights, I was cooking, keeping inventory, asking for quest information, and keeping the gear repaired and functional. Many nights I stayed up late, sharpening swords or repairing gear, only to have my hard work receive a nod and no other recognition.

In fights, I demanded even more of myself. Slipping in between enemies, causing damage. I delved down most of the “surgical” pathway of the healer ability, which allowed me to cause a diverse array of damage. I built up my MP until I could activate Wordless Incantation, as I found the group's irritation was a lot less if they couldn’t hear me. I immobilized enemies and allowed the others to finish them off. Because I had a hand in almost every single enemy’s death, I received a good amount of XP and fame from each fight, which angered Jack to no end.

“Stop stealing our experience!” He snapped after a fight, reading the notification that stated the rewards and experience given out.

“You asked me to immobilize them.” I answered quietly, feeling tired. “Do you want me to stop?”

“…” He glared at me silently for a few moments before answering. “Figure out a way to do it without taking my XP.”

“…sure.”

“I mean it, Healer.” From the moment he heard my class, he had never called me by my name. Our friendship, the time we had spent together… none of it meant anything next to the weight of the one undeniable fact:

I was a Healer. And therefore, in his eyes, I was a burden.

I kept my head down, trying to help out as much as possible. I learned not to ask for recognition. To not expect thanks. And I thought things would never change.

And then came the day we met Winter.

________________

PRESENT DAY

“Ouch!” Stephanie yelped as I carefully placed the needle through her skin, placing a simple suture across the wound on her calf. I didn’t hesitate with her cry of pain, tying the knot and moving on to the next stitch.

“The area has been numbed with magic, don’t pretend it hurts.”

“Yeah, I was just messing with you.” Stephanie laughed stuck her tongue out. “How did you know?”

“Because I know how it feels to sew my wounds shut without the local anesthesia spell.” I kept working without looking up. “You wouldn’t just be saying ‘ouch.’”  

“Uh…Well, thank you.”

I felt surprised at her words. After a year with the Hero’s party, I was so used to doing things without any gratitude or recognition. You’re not with them anymore. I let out a mental sigh of relief at the thought, and smiled at Stephanie. “You’re welcome.”

“YOU SMILED!” Stephanie tried to get up to hug me, but Alton reached over from where he was sewing cloth nearby and pushed her back down, shaking his head with a grin.

“Don’t interrupt her work.” Winter’s response was much colder, causing Stephanie to freeze in place.

“I’m on the last one anyways.” I squared off the last knot on the suture, cutting the tails and placing a clean bandage over my work. “Keep it dry for 48 hours, and then you can remove the outer covering and bathe.”

“Not to cheapen all the work you just put into repairing this cut for me…” Stephanie hesitated. “But wouldn’t a healing potion be easier?”

Alton shook his head, but before he could say anything Winter spoke up. “Stupid human.”

“HEY! I’m not stupid!” She glanced at me. “Right?”

“No, you’re not.” Raising an eyebrow at Winter, who settled down with a grunt, I continued. “Have you noticed that over time you’ve had to use more powerful healing potions?”

She thought that over. “Well, yeah, but… I’m higher level, and have more HP… Isn’t that normal?”

“Have you tried to use a basic potion recently?” I pulled one out, and tossed it to her. “Here.”

Stephanie caught it, clearly confused. “I’m only missing 5 HP… I don’t need something that heals 10…”

“Try it.”

“Okay.” She shrugged. “If you insist…” She drank the potion quickly, and then flinched at the notification. “…It didn’t work? … Not even the cut healed.” 

Alton continued to sew, but spoke up. “The more you use healing potions, the less they work. Fortunately, this seems limited to healing potions… mana recovery and other types of potions such as detoxification seem to not develop the same resistance. It’s also a slow process, but it’s becoming a universal issue. If you check the world chat this is a heated topic of discussion. Most people believe the that it’s related to level… but that’s not the case.”

“How do you know that?”

“They still work on me.” I answered quietly. “That’s why I carry the basic ones around.”

“Foolish humans… these potions were meant for true lifesaving emergencies… a basic healing potion should be enough to recover up to 50% of your health… but you drink them like water until they are worthless to you.” Winter sighed, looking over at me with a small smile. “That is why the Healers are such a vital class. In a world of constant danger and battle, of destruction and pain, only they have the power to heal and preserve. They are a noble, selfless light that protects those around them… someone to be protected at all costs. There should be a Healer in every party… but instead Nat is the only one left.”

“You did save me before!” Stephanie did get up unobstructed and hugged me. “Thank you!”

“And me.” Winter added, staring at the ground. “She saved me as well.”

“Hey, I distinctly remember passing out in front of her and being saved too, guys!” Alton spoke up, tying up his thread and checking the repair on his cape before looking at me. “I guess we are all indebted to you.”

I stared at all of them, feeling disturbed in my heart. “You guys… I’m…”

I’m worthless. Weak. And my weakness was used to destroy countless lives.

“… Thank you.” I silenced the words in my heart, and spoke a simple thanks instead.

“…” Winter was staring. I always felt he could see more than I wanted him too, as if my hidden thoughts and feelings were on display in front of him. But instead of commenting, he simply bent down, plucking a blue flower from the ground, and handed it to me.

“That’s so cute!” Stephanie clapped her hands, before freezing. “Wait! Are you two…?”

Alton paused in packing up his things and stared in our direction.

I shook my head silently at her before turning back to Winter. “Thank you. The mountain wild flower’s petals have strong anti-inflammatory properties. I’ll dry it out and process it for medication at our next stop." I pressed the flower carefully in one of my books and packed it away.

Winter nodded at my words. “You’re welcome.”

“It’s for medicine?” Stephanie frowned, disappointed. “Well, that’s boring. Where’s my drama?!”

Alton smiled widely. “Oh, don’t worry, I got your drama! Look in the world chat!”

Pausing, all of us pulled up the chat, excluding Winter, who leaned on a tree nearby and watched the display over my shoulder. The top topic in the chat was skyrocketing with engagement… and seeing the title it wasn’t hard to understand why:

___________________________

“TROUBLE IN PARADISE? HERO’S PARTY SEEN ARGUING WITH NEW MEMBER REBECCA THE SORCERESS! IS THE USELESS HEALER MISSED?”

There was great discussion today among players as a loud disagreement broke out among the Hero’s Party after their last quest line. Although it is unknown the exact nature of it, it seems to be surrounding the recent addition to the party.  Rebecca the Sorceress is the newest member of the Hero’s Party after the departure of the much-despised Healer. Many had cheered her arrival, as well as supporting the apparent budding relationship between the Hero and his new magical lady.

___________________________

“And you guys ask why I think humans are stupid.” Winter muttered as he read along with me. I shushed him and continued on with the post.

___________________________

But is there a fracture in the once iron-strong team? Words such as “Useless,” “Hiding” and “Potion sponge” were heard shouted by Rita the Holy Archer, with the Hero defending and Garrett the Giant siding beside Rita. Rebecca appeared to be in tears. Is this bullying the newcomer? Is Rebecca actually dragging the team down? What does this mean for the plans to attack the forty second gate in a few days?

Discuss your thoughts below!

___________________________

I sighed and closed the chat, seeing that comments were mostly just going back and forth over the juicy gossip. “What a mess.”

“You don’t sound surprised.” Alton commented with a grin.

“No. I’m not. Rebecca… she’s…”

“Useless?” Stephanie interjected.

“Full of tears and excuses?” Was Alton’s contribution.

“A snake who poisons those foolish enough to trust it.” Winter quietly added.

I laughed. “… I was going to say she’s a lot of drama… but I like your answers better. They are used to a certain standard of having everything done for them, even if I backed off quite a bit towards the end, when things had gotten really bad. I don’t think Rebecca will see my role within the group as appealing, though.”

“Oh well, their loss is our gain!” Stephanie cheered, hugging me again. “Let’s go hunting! I want meat for dinner!” She pulled out her sword excitedly.

“Yes, Natalie should have some meat to help her recover from all the battles we’ve been through.” Winter nodded, checking his bow and following.

Alton stood up and looked over at me. “Meat for dinner doesn’t sound bad… what do you think, Ms. Healer? Do you want to go hunting?”

“I don’t want to ruin their fun…” I started to say, looking at the backs of the two already moving ahead.

Alton’s voice was serious. “No. I’m not asking about them. I’m asking what YOU want to do.”

I paused, and my gaze met his own. After a few moments, I smiled. “Meat sounds great for dinner.” And I meant it.

“Then let’s go hunting with them.”  Was his answer.

And hunting we went.

With only two days left before we would face the forty-second gate.

#writing #fantasy #the healer #violence #magic #video game like world #betrayal #friends

[lemonmaid]

Hiiii, I have a request. Imagine a highschool AU where reader has a massive crush on Sukuna but she thinks he has a thing with Uraume, but he actually likes her. Ok ok, so hear me out. Reader is childhood friends with Yuuji and Sukuna and she notices how Sukuna and Uraume have been hanging out a lot. So she asks Yuuji if Sukuna is going to prom and he says yes, and that he is probably going with Uraume. So reader is sad and doesn't want to go to prom anymore even after already buy her dress. Buttt, the day before prom, Sukuna and Reader end up talking and she mentions how he and Uraume are going together and he is confused.  Then they both confess and end up going together. Pleaseeeeee make this as angsty as possible, I love me some good angst😫

A/N: Gotchu pookie!! Sorry if this looks rushed, I had a hard time writing this

Warnings: angst, miscommunication, female aligned reader, bodyshaming, self-hatred, mentions of teen pregnancy, everyone is OOC too much for my taste I apologize for that.

Prom.

If there was one thing (Name) hated, it was waiting for a text. It felt vulnerable, and it felt weak or pathetic really.

[You] > Suki

Hey, what's your plans this weekend?

Read 11:56 am

(Name) sighed, scrolling through Instagram, seeing the girls from her class post sneak peaks of their prom dress.

"SISSSSYYYYYYYYY!" (Name) flinched as Yuuji jumped into her lap.

"Yuuji, don't scare me like that!" (Name) sighed as she removed the five year old from her lap.

Yuuji pouted, "You're supposed to be spending time with me!!! Not uncle suki!". He huffed.

Three years ago.

"Ew why does he look like that" Sukuna scowled.

Sukuna let out of a cry of pain as he was hit on the back of the back of the head. "Quiet boy!" Watsuke yelled.

The family was in shambles at the moment. Jin calling Sukuna at 3 a.m. saying that a girl that he met a party a while back, hit him up saying she was in labor, que the family freaking out and lucky for you, since you slept over, you got to see Sukuna's new nephew!!

Don't ask about the custody battle.

"Where is Sukuna anyways? I thought he was supposed to be babysitting you, not leaving me with you".

Yuujis face filled with dread.

"Not that I don't like hanging out with you!!! You're like family to me!!".

Yuuji got off the couch to go to his toybin, "I don't knooowww he said he was going to hang with....Ur-... Urau".

(Name) felt sad, "Uraume?".

"Yeah!! Them!". Yuuji handed (Name) an action figure, "Okay, you, so you can be captain, but I have to be Spiderman!".

"If you're not going to let us see the dress we are leaving".

'Let's go shopping together they said! It will be fun! We'll get boba and lunch!!' (Name) mumbled, then groaned before moving the curtain. "I feel like a pig in a dress, what's the theme again?".

Suguru looked up from his phone, "I'm sure it's like, 'Stary night'.

Satoru came out of the dressing room next to (Name), wearing a dress, "Suguru check it out! I look like a chic!!". Suguru looked at Satoru with disinterest while Satoru laughed like a manic.

The two boys erupted in laughter, Shoko appearing towards (Name)'s side, "ignore those two, you look great".

When (Name) looked at herself in the dress, she could only see her flaws, like how her boob's didn't fit properly or how it didn't hug the right places. "Maybe this isn't the one".

A bang on the wall intrupted (Name) from her thoughts, "Hurrryyyy up!!! Suguru wants go to the arcade!" Satoru whined. (Name) frowned, sighing and taking off the dress .

"Oh my God, yes!!!". Cheers and claps echoed the hallway, another prom proposal accepted. (Name) watched the happy couple celebrate down the hall, "gross right?". (Name) whipped her head around to see Sukuna.

(Name) smiled softly, "I think it's sweet".

Sukuna hummed.

"Unlike a certain someone who dumped me with babysitting duty".

"Tsk." Sukuna grabbed your bag, "AP Chemistry, right?". (Name) nodded before quickly ran behind him.

"Class, please settle down, I understand prom is in a few days, but I need you guys to finish this senior project, which is due next week."

Uraume sat next to (Name), "Did you grab the beakers?"

"Oh no sorry, let me grab them real quick".

"It's fine, I'll grab us some goggles while I'll grab them".

"Okay, thanks Uraume".

It's not that (Name) hated Uraume or disliked them. It was just- maybe envy? Uraume went to the same middle school as Sukuna, while (Name) only went to elementary together. Maybe it was a good thing (Name) didn't go to middle school with Sukuna and Uraume since they both got suspended....

"Hey are you listening?".

(Name) blushed, "oh, sorry, I zoned out"

Uraume nodded, "I was asking if you grab your prom dress yet... you know small talk".

"Oh... not yet, what about you?".

Uraume turned on the bunsen burner, "Well, I'm not going, but Sukuna wants to ditch prom for some frat party close by-".

Static. (Name) suddenly couldn't hear Uraume's monotone voice. Why was she upset? I mean, Sukuna was never the type to go to a dance or school get-together. Why is she upset? Why can't she connect to Sukuna like she used to? Why doesn't she get invited out-

Uraume looked over at (Name), "(Name) are you okay?".

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just so tired".

"So are you going?". Shoko sat on (Name)'s bed watching the girl mope in bed.

"I don't know Shoko... is there a point?".

Shoko sighed, "you know, not going because of one boy is kinda pathetic"

(Name) rolled hed eyes, "Wow, thanks."

"You could go with me. And Suguru-"

(Name) was slient, "I don't even like how I look".

"I do".

(Name) gagged, "Stop it Shoko".

Shoko was quiet for a minute, she walked to (Name)'s window, opening it, then grabbing a ciggerate from her purse,"Listen, we care about you. And it sucks to see you down because of one guy. Don't ruin this experience by not going. "

(Name) bit her lip, clutching the comforter tighter, "I guess...".

Shoko took the ciggerate out of her mouth, flicking it out of the window then going back to lay down next to (Name) on the bed, "There's my favorite girl, let's go last minute shopping with Utahime."

"You don't to dress for anyone! Jesus, pick something that fits you!". Utahime ranted as she went through the clothing rack.

Utahime was literally foaming at the mouth, "No, that color doesn't suit your tone- Definitely not feathered- Shoko!!!! Did you find anything in theme?".

Shoko looked up from her phone, looking at a clothing rack. "Here, you can't go wrong with black-"

"Black is for formals and funerals."

"She could be a black hole."

"Shoko no."

(Name) looked at the black sparkly dress, it was long and looked fitted. "Um, this looks like it hugs".

"That's the point-"

Utahime looked at the dress, "Well, go try it on!"

(Name) was shoved into a dressing room.

'Why am I so nervous? And sweaty, Jesus christ (Name) get it together. "

The dress was beautiful, really, but in (Name)'s mind, all she could see was the flaws. It was like a black oozing leaking from her brain and affecting her body, small things making bigger outcomes.

Shoke helped herself into the dressing room, "SHOKO!".

"What your dressed".

"What if I wasn't?!".

"You look amazing to me".

(Name)'s face went red, "oh hush!".

"I think you should get it"

(Name) looked at herself in the mirror. It was pretty, and it did kinda made feel better about herself.

"Sse you're smiling, that's a good sign!". Shoko wrapped her arms around (Name)'s neck.

Prom night was the worst, (Name) felt like she didn't deserve this or Shoko, she forced herself to get ready and everytime the time got closer, the temptation to just cancel plans got harder.

(Name) looked at herself in the mirror, she looked amazing but felt like shit. (Name)'s phone rang, echoing in the room.

"Hello?"

"Hey are you home?"

(Name)'s heart stopped, "Sukuna?"

"Yeah?"

"Why did you call me?".

"...are you home?"

"I mean, yeah, but-"

"Cool, I'm coming in"

"Wait what-".

The line died and the door opened.

"Sukuna! You can't just-".

Sukuna was quiet, "dont call me that please".

(Name) was shocked, and Sukuna was very out of character, "you dyed your hair".

"I did".

The two stood in silence.

"Are... you going to prom?".

(Name) crossed her arms, "No I just like to dress pretty".

"You're beautiful".

Sukuna took a deep breathe, "I don't deserve you. You've been there for me and I haven't been there for you".

"...Suki"

"I'm so selfish, I want you. I don't wanna go to prom and have to share your attention"

"Now Sukuna... you can't have (Name) to yourself all recess.... what if she wants to play with her other friends- "

Sukuna looked at the teacher with a glare, the five year old's face was red, "NO!"

"Now, Sukuna... that's not how we express our anger let's go to the quiet corner for now".

(Name) watched as Sukuna pouted in the corner of the room, walking to him and sitting besides him in silence.

(Name) wrapped her arms around Sukuna, "it felt like you were pushing me away.... I noticed that you were only hanging out with Uraume....I thought you two were dating for a bit".

Sukuna made a gagging noise, "ew no".

"So that's your plan... getting suspended?" Uraume looked up at Sukuna.

"Yep and I want your help".

Uraume shrugged their shoulders, "okay".

(Name) hummed, "what now?"

"Do you wanna go to prom with me?".

"Hmm, I kinda didn't want to go anyways, maybe we can just chill here".

A ringing intrupted the two.

'Crap I forgot about Shoko'.

"Why dont you go, save me a dance?"

(Name) smiled softly, "sure".

Sukuna walked (Name) to Shoko's car, grabbing her hand before she could get in, "I... I like you alot... it's hard to... describe..".

(Name)'s heart fluttered, a smile grew upon her face, "I love you too Suki".

Small snip,

"Unlce Suki!!"

"What brat".

"I wanna be just like you when I grow up".

Sukuna looked at the three year old with distain.

"What makes you think that-"

"We have the same hair color and and the same birth marks-"

Sukuna dyed his hair black that night, causing Jin and their father to try and calm an inconsolable Yuuji.

#sukuna x reader #jjk modern au #x female reader #jjk x reader #baby yuuji #uncle sukuna #sukuna ryoumen x reader

[lullabyes22-blog]

Silco Reads Thirst Tweets

Based on this ask<3

Teaser:

Sevika: Sir, please. It's not too late to call this off.

Silco: Nonsense, Sevika. How better to have a finger on the pulse of the city than through their daily thoughts?

Sevika: … It's not their pulse you'd be fingering, sir.

tw: explicit language

Silco: I can think of a hundred better uses for my time. But if this is what Zaunites want…

Sevika: Sir, please. It's not too late to call this off.

Silco: Nonsense, Sevika. How better to have a finger on the pulse of the city than through their daily thoughts?

Sevika: … It's not their pulse you'd be fingering, sir.

Silco: Don't be crass.

Sevika: Only warning you, sir. There's filth on there that'd make a streetwalker drop dead.

Silco: Then it shall be educational for all involved.

Sevika: Sweet Janna…

Silco: Let's begin. First off: Twitter user @c0ckw00d.

Sevika: Oh gods, it's even worse than I thought.

Silco: It says here, "Silco, I'm soaking wet for you right now." Well, Twitter user C0ckw00d, you'll be happy to hear that our new water filtration systems are due to be deployed across the Lanes within the week. So if you're soaking wet, at least it's not from your contaminated shower.

Sevika: …

Silco: Next one: @DaddysDirtyGirl. "Silco, I want you to choke me with that big cock of yours." Well, Twitter user DaddysDirtyGirl. If by "choke" you mean "strangle", then you will find that my hands are better suited to improving your quality of life than any other part of my anatomy.

Sevika: Sir, don't encourage them.

Silco: That was a threat, not an encouragement. Next up: @PiltoverPr0nz.

Sevika: No. Don't read that one, sir.

Silco: @PiltoverPr0nz. What a creative handle. Though I have to say, the pornographic content from Piltover is of rather poor quality. Here in Zaun, it would barely qualify as softcore.

Sevika: Sir, stop.

Silco: Our Piltover friend says: "Silco, you can shove your boot up my ass and make me sing soprano." Well, Twitter user Piltoverpr0nz, while I am a proponent of vocal enrichment, I believe a voice coach would be more appropriate than a steel-capped boot.

Sevika: Just stop.

Silco: Come now. It's been remarkably tame so far.

Sevika: It's gonna get worse. Mark my words.

Silco: Ah, a tweet from @Jinx4Prez. I like that handle.

Sevika: Of course you do.

Silco: Jinx's ardent lobbyist has written: "Silco, just letting you know, I'm masturbating to your latest speech and coming my brains out over my keyboard."

Sevika: And there it is.

Silco: While I'm flattered by my speeches having an uplifting effect on our youth, I will remind you, Twitter user Jinx4Prez, that a sticky keyboard will be an impediment to future productivity.

Sevika: This is only going to get worse.

Silco: Next: @Daddys_Little_Monster.

Sevika: Oh gods…

Silco: A lot of Daddy references in these tweets. Interesting. "Silco, I'd ride your cock like I stole it." Well, Twitter user Daddys_Little_Monster, if you'd stolen it, then you'd risk getting arrested for grand larceny. Which, as you know, is a serious offense, and now comes with a heavy penalty under the new criminal code.

Sevika: Grand larceny implies your cock's insured for at least a half million...

Silco: I'd planned to mention that during the next budget proposal.

Sevika: Sir...

Silco: Ah, this next one isn't so bad. Twitter user @SilcosBitch has written: "Silco, if you were a god, my ass would be your shrine."

Sevika: How is this an improvement?

Silco: It's the religious overtones. I enjoy a little sacrilege now and then.

Sevika: ...

Silco: Oh, this next one's quite droll. From Twitter user @Pentaharmy: "I want Silco to spell out my name with his cum."

Sevika: ...

Silco: Not an admirer of modern art, Sevika?

Sevika: It's like some sick form of word association.

Silco: Hmm. This next tweet is a little more poignant. From Twitter user @ShimmerSluzz. They say: "I'm a virgin, and I'm saving myself for you, Silco. I'll never let another man touch me."

Sevika: That's fucked up.

Silco: Now, now. They're young, impressionable, and likely a victim of childhood trauma. You should empathise.

Sevika: They're probably a serial killer in the making.

Silco: Well, if they murder any Councilors, it'll be because I've inspired them to greatness. Next: @HornyForTheIndustrialist.

Sevika: This just gets worse and worse.

Silco: "Silco, I want you to come up with a new drug so I can get addicted and then suck you off to pay for my next hit." Well, Twitter user HornyForTheIndustrialist. If you wish to seek addiction counselling, then I'd be happy to offer a bursary. We've recently begun a government-sponsored rehabilitation program.

Sevika: ...

Silco: Oh, and the same user has written: "Silco's so sexy when he's frothing at the mouth."

Sevika: Obviously they've never heard you ranting on the warpath.

Silco: Like all good illusions, it's about maintaining a mystique.

Sevika: Uh-huh.

Silco: Here's a more interesting one. From Twitter user @DickInProgress: "Silco, I want you to bend me over and fuck me so hard that the Lanes feel it." Well, Twitter user Dickinprogress, if the Lanes feel anything, it's a severe case of infrastructural neglect. But if you're willing to contribute to the restoration effort, I will happily accept.

Sevika: You're enjoying this, aren't you?

Silco: Why should I not? Zaunites are a creative lot. I applaud their efforts.

Sevika: I've seen what some of 'em draw. I guarantee you wouldn't applaud that.

Silco: Hmm. Next is from @SexGatewayChemist. They write: "Silco, I wish I was the Shimmer you shoot into your veins."

Sevika: You see what I'm talking about now?

Silco: A little morbid, yes. But I understand their sentiment.

Sevika: You do?

Silco: Being injected into the veins is the most surefire means of persuasion.

Sevika: That's not what they meant, sir.

Silco: Next up. Hm. @VandersAFurry.

Sevika: Do NOT read that one, sir.

Silco: What is a Furry, Sevika?

Sevika: Please don't make me explain.

Silco: VandersAFurry writes: "Silco, I fantasize about your beautiful eyes watching me while I ride your fat cock."

Sevika: Sweet fucking Janna.

Silco: "Your hands wrapped around my throat as you fuck me so hard that I pass out. Then you'd wake me up by choking me again."

Sevika: Gods damnit.

Silco: "I'd love for you to come all over my face while calling me a filthy little bitch."

Sevika: Fucking-

Silco: "Then, if I was good, you'd make me lick it all off."

Sevika: That does it. Game over. Gimme your phone.

Silco: This is an impressive level of degeneracy. And here was I, thinking I'd hit the nadir of human perversion.

Sevika: It's a bottomless well, sir.

Silco: Well said. Fortunately, I've seen worse.

Sevika: You have?

Silco: Why, yes. Just last night, in fact.

Sevika: Wait. Last night?

Silco: That's right.

Sevika: So when you said you had dirty business to take care of, that was a euphemism?

Silco: A necessary omission.

Sevika: What, you've got a side piece?

Silco: More of an outlet.

Sevika: Well, I'm glad you told me.

Silco: Of course. There should be no secrets between us. And I hope you'll forgive me for not inviting you along. I just assumed that you'd rather not be involved in that sort of thing.

Sevika: Not really my scene, sir.

Silco: Fair enough. Now, as to this Twitter business. What did you call it again? Thirst Tweets?

Sevika: Yes, sir.

Silco: Well, I believe that Zaun's Twitterscape requires a stern, authoritative hand.

Sevika: What, are you gonna start censoring these people?

Silco: Censorship is an outdated and ineffective form of government intervention. No, we will simply use the tweets as a targeted form of recruitment.

Sevika: You... want to hire an army of perverts?

Silco: A force of nature cannot be controlled. But it can be harnessed.

Sevika: So you're gonna put 'em to work.

Silco: Precisely.

Sevika: So they don't have the time to spend all day tweeting.

Silco: Indeed. And in doing so, we will gain a much-needed workforce.

Sevika: I can get behind that.

Silco: Very good. Because I will need you to lead this recruitment effort.

Sevika: Wait, what?!

Silco: Your expertise will be invaluable.

Sevika: Fuck no. There's no way I'm spending my days wading through the cesspool of horny degeneracy on Twitter.

Silco: I'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning.

Sevika: ...

Silco: Oh, and one more thing.

Sevika: Yeah?

Silco: If any of these recruits try to touch you, you have my full permission to break their hands.

Sevika: With pleasure.

Silco: Good. Now get some sleep. You've got a busy day ahead of you.

Sevika: ...Yes, sir...

#arcane #arcane league of legends #arcane silco #silco #forward but never forget/xoxo #forward (never forget)/xoxo #arcane jinx #jinx #arcane sevika #sevika #arcane zaun #zaun #arcane vander #vander #thirst tweets #arcane crack #arcane shitpost

[miloformula123fan]

Could you do fic for Peter 'Bono' Bonnington with wife reader? Bono was on the way to meet his wife and kid(s) and was stopped by Nico Rosberg. Nico's like an excited child trying to make a convo with him. And his family just laughed while watching Nico fumbling over his worlds in front of Bono. Nico then spotted them and decided to ask them a few questions. Just something fluff and sweet. Add something if you want to. You decide how it ended. Thanks!! :)))

look at me, still getting fics out

(also my current inbox is about 30, if this ever gets above 50, i'm closing requests :D)

Please keep requesting - y'all have awesome ideas we agree on a lot of stuff :) - my guidelines are here, and if you want some prompts, they are here.

also feel free to come in and start chatting to me in my asks, would love to get to know y'all better

and if you want to be added to my taglist lmk :)

peter bonnington x wife!reader

Bono was excited for this weekend. His wife had brought their 3 year old twins to their first race and so he was speeding through his meetings and the paddock to find his family.

And was he a little in his head?

Yeah

Did that mean he really had to bump into Nico Rosberg?

Apparently, yeah.

“Oh, hey Bono, um, wonderful to see you the paddock, I mean, you are always in the paddock, but y’know, obviously nice to see you…” Nico was floundering, panicking. He’d obviously seen Bono when he was in the Mercedes paddock, but that was before he had become the force he was today.

“Yeah Nico, lovely to see you too, is there anything you need?” Bono was a little annoyed, he just wanted to find his wife and kids, but he was happy to indulge Nico for a second as he tried to find them.

Y/N was barely 5 metres away, having enjoyed a nice coffee and some lunch with the kids. She felt like a spy sitting there with her sunglasses watching as Nico fumbled for his words, blushing and panicking, as her husband tried to look for a way to find his family, or at least a way out of this conversation. She smiled, before picking up her bag, and pointing out to her children their father, as they sprinted through people’s legs to get there.

“Dad! Dad!”

Bono turned around with a huge smile on his face, as he spotted his kids, opening up his arms, as they hugged him, picking them up.

He almost forgot about Nico as he let teh kids talk about how cool he looked and what they’d done at school that week.

Almost.

As he put the kids down, and placed a soft kiss on his wife’s lips, he noticed Nico crouching down and talking to his kids.

“Hello, what are your names?” Nico asked while crouching down to the 3 year olds level.

“I’m Clara and that’s Carl.” The girl, Clara, seemed a lot more confident that the boy, her brother, Carl, who almost was hiding behind his sister.

“It’s lovely to meet you both, I’m Nico, I’m friends with your dad. Are you gonna follow in his footsteps and be racing drivers? Or follow mum’s footsteps and be ballerinas?” Nico asked

“Oh god, Nico. The endless debate in our household. Clara wants to get into karts, but Pete is against it. And Carl wants to get into ballet and I’m against it. So…” Y/N laughed as she hugged Nico as he stood up. “Lovely to see you though.”

“Lovely to see you as well, come around for a dinner some time, Viv would love to see you.” Nico smiled before crouching down to the kids level “and Clara, if you ever need a kart, and your dad won’t let you, call me, and I’l buy you one, okay?”

“Nico stop corrupting my kids.” Bono laughed, before starting to usher the family back to hospitality. 

“I would never.” Nico feigned shock, before waving goodbye and returning to Sky.

“Now, c’mon, I’m hungry, let’s go get lunch!”

---

taglist: @leosxrealm, @tallrock35, @wolf-knights, @janeholt3, @pear-1206

#f1 x reader #miloformula123fan #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #peter bonnington x reader #bono x reader #peter bonnington fic #peter bonnington #peter bonnington x female reader #peter bonnington x you #peter bonnington x y/n #bono fic #bono #bono x female reader #bono x you #bono x y/n

[compassionatereminders]

i just wanted to get something off my mind and ask you for your opinion. my boyfriend loves his family and he is pushing me into contacting my mom. i lived with my mom and dad till i was 8. my mom was very abusive she hit me, yelled for no reason, called me a bitch, whore and so on. when she hit me she did hit me to places that can't be seen (places you can cover up with clothes) if i told my dad she would beat me harder or threaten me that she will kill herself so i stopped telling my dad. my mom was also known to (excuse the word but i can't literally say anything else) whore around. the apartment building where we lived most people knew (my dad knew also but he always forgave her) she would kick me out, she would yell GET THE FUCK OUT and i would have to go play in front of our apartment building when she had her fuck buddies coming to our apartment, of course at that time i had no idea why she was kicking me out.

after my mom left me and my dad i had no contacts with her, i had visits for 6 months - i was at her place every second weekend but later on i could stop going because she didn't want me there anymore. and i was more than happy with that!!!

she has a new family now my boyfriend saw pictures how happy she looks with her 2 kids and says she probably changed now.

my mom tried to contact me on social media, i blocked her on everything, she wasn't happy with that so her new husband was sending me nasty messages and she was also sending me nasty messages from his profile.

i said to my boyfriend if he forgot about the nasty messages she sent me (they were really insulting, she called me names she called me when i was a kid; retarded, stupid, bitch, whore...)

my boyfriend's response was that people just get mad and at the end of the day she is still my mom and she deserves another chance and she deserves my forgiveness.

i also found out that my mom and my boyfriend were messaging each other on fb, they were planning on meeting (he was convincing me to meet her)

i feel betrayed and honestly it makes me love him way less. him being close with his family shouldn't make me being close with my mom who abused me.

i told my best friend that i'm thinking of ending the relationship because for the past 3 months he keep pushing me into "you must forgive and forget, you must meet your mom". my best friend says i'm overreacting. i'm not overreacting to not wanting to meet my mom but i'm overreacting about dumping my boyfriend. she says that i'm crazy because he is loyal to me. but i feel that just being loyal isn't enough? great you're not sleeping around that's a bare minimum in my opinion.

he is my first boyfriend and i have been with him since i was 17 (i'm 22 now), looking back i think i overlooked so many red flags. he was always sweet to me, and as far as i know he has been loyal but he always pushed me into things that i wasn't into. i'm a horrible people pleaser and i say yes to things i don't really want but when it comes to my mom it's a NO and i'm never going ro change my mind.

he is guilt tripping me that i'm not a good person (not the exact words, he uses fancier expressions like "good people forgive") to a point i really think if i'm the bad one in this scenario.

it's such a long message and i'm so sorry about that but i just wonder if you or your followers think that trying to convince someone to re-connect with the abuser is a red flag or not?

my dad says i don't ever have to meet my mom but he also says by boyfriend has a point so i feel like everyone is against me.

I don't think you're overreacting, and I think it's highly inappropriate of your boyfriend to pressure you to forgive your mom when you've made it clear that you aren't feeling it. Interfering in that manner is not acceptable, and it's definitely a giant red flag. Especially after you've made it clear that YOU don't want to do this. Because it's YOUR decision

#chat with kat #sex tw #abuse tw #abuse apologism tw #violence tw #physical abuse tw #suicide threats tw #swearing tw

[boxwinebaddie]

Hi Uncle Nina !!

I don't wanna clog your ask box with stupid shit but this is stupid shit but it was also my bday on the thirteenth so shjdjdjs

As a fellow Monster addict ( I got a flat of Monster for my bday and collect the cans I have 30 diff ones so far <3 ) I need to know what Stan's favourite is

And on the less stupid side of things I was also hoping to potentially hear more about Stan's trans journey/Kyle finding out Raven is trans

Also I'm sorry your job has been so stressful lately :(( I hope you have a good day 🧡

- Stan 🧡

hi orange heart stan! <3

it's so good to hear from you, baby.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHSLAY, MY LOVE! i'm sorry i'm a little late, but you know me -- everything i do is fashionably late, darling. ;)

but also!!!!! call your wonderful, lovely ask message stupid shit again!!! see what happens!!! i'm gonna frown So WIDE, i'm gonna look so Upset. i'm going to hold you up to the sun!!! JUST WATCH!!!! >;/

my sweet stannie; you are a gift, a treasure. and your ask memes are a pleasure. i don't find them stupid in any shape or form, be nice. conversely, they are extremely special to me and it's why i put off writing this message for a little while because i wanted to respond to it thoughtfully, seeing as though it's your bday message.

which, *cracks knuckles* to get the ball roooollling.

i can absolutely tell you what monster energy is stan's favorite, but as a bday bonus, bc i wasn't sure which stan you wanted to know about, or if you wanted both: i'll give you both my style's fave monster flavs

and i was going to go into some ravenstan trans lore after that, but i feel like that info should go in it's own ask, yeah? i just don't want it to get cluttered. so if you feel so inclined, would you mind sending me a second anon where i can drop that info? thank you, baby! mwah

but now, w/o further ado...

please enjoy the most Refreshing part of your day <333

for context ( and actually because i got an anon once who wanted to know whether i drink energy drinks ), i don't really know that much about energy drinks/flavors because i don't really drink energy drinks.

i mean okay, i'm not really sure if it counts as an energy drink, but i will chug a guayaki yerba mate like it is the elixir of life. ( also i fully maintain that pep stan drinks the enlightenment flavor and ravenstan drinks the raspberry one -- crunchy eco kings ) my favorite one is the passion terrere one. it's like the only one that doesn't come in a can and only comes in a glass bottle...that ice cold passion terrere mate in the glass...it hits so different than the can...oh my god. so good.

and as far as monsters go, i pretty much only drink pipeline punch bc i'm a pretty pink princess and that's what hot girls drink <3 but other than that i drink black coffee because i am an exhausted teacher girlie, but that's purely for fuel. to be honest, i rarely drink energy drinks just for fun, i only have caffeine to stay upright.

which isn't a great idea...but...i am not a role model....

speaking of:

so i told riley this story the other day, bc i needed to get her brilliant genius girl insight on energy drink flavors because she is the sugar free energy queen ( riley's answer was kyle x ultra strawberry dreams and stan x ultra mango fiesta, which, everyone say thank u riley <3 )

-- also god if you are real, bring back the watermelon lime venom you discontinued, you sick fuck, it was riley's favorite, thank you for giving us lovely orange heart stan, and fuck you very much for making ME, bitch! come on down, king! you won't! why the fuck would you extend my coworkers vacation! fight me, ugly!!!! --

and i was telling her about how i am the chaotic kenny friend, i make really bad, chaotic decisions, have no self preservation, hype and gas up my extremely bad ideas and convince myself i'm big brain, wow.

and...oof. so like 2-3 years ago during finals week, i had a fuck ton of essays and projects due ( i was a very bad student btw which is funny bc i'm a teacher ) and no idea how i was gonna do them, so i had the Brilliant Idea...to buy three Random bang energy drinks...

AND SHOTGUN ALL OF THEM BACK TO BACK LIKE BEER CANS.

ohhhhhhhhhhhh my god, party girl nina. help. crying.

and yknow, i thought this was such a good idea! i was like wow i'm gonna be so awake, i am going to b invincible.

i....was not Invicible. i was...very, very sick. i was like almost catatonic and shaking on the floor of my dorm bathroom, lmao. i had to have my roomate take a picture of me on the floor and text all my teachers what happened, which, thank god they were all really nice and laughed but...i feel like that tells you everything you need to know about me...people who think i'm their hero...i am a fucking idiot.

but!! BUUUUTTT! just for You, baby. i deep dived a lot of forums and read a lot about the flavor profiles and think...i made a pretty accurate assertion of what my kid's energy drink preferences are <3

me: paris hilton pipeline punch bc i am bad as hell ;)

stan the man with the plan: okay, so i think that pep stan is definitely that ultra paradise monster energy. it just seems really crisp, clean, earthy. stan also doesn't really care for sweets or sugar, so it makes sense to me that he would be drinking a zero sugar monster ( kyle is disgusted ) idk the kiwi, lime, cucumber flavor profile just feels like pep stan. please tell me you can see the vision, help.

kyle pile: hmmm...so what i've concluded with my research is that kyle pile probably likes that pacific pipeline monster that seems to taste like fruit punch <3 it has to be the full sugar ones because of his blood sugar and stan does kind of scold kyle for drinking them bc he's not really supposed to and he gets really cracked out ahdslkshd like he's really cute but stan is like oh my god bro you gotta lay down but yeah i think that one or the orange dreamsicle one, which is hilarious because the only foods stmwtp canonically does not like are pickles and artifical orange flavoring...he really loves kp.

raven: soooooo i know that i said pep stan was the mango loco monster energy, BUT RAVENSTAN IS LITERALLY THE MANGO LOCO MONSTER ENERGY LIKE HELLO??? also i feel like he is like those mexican dads that put a little tajin in whatever they're eating and act like they've invented fire heeeeeelp ravenstan is so the dad that cuts u up fruit into little shapes and pus tajin on them and feeds u them when ur sad <333 luv u raven ;-; <3 but yeah i feel like he full on turns it into a raspado its so unserious sometimes theres a shot in there, it's usually the spicy tamarind smirnoff vodka,

...what can i say my man is a visionary and i see it

jersey: oooookaaaaay. so...sigh. for Obvious Reasons, pre and during rm, because of kyle's ed, he only drinks the sugar free monsters. for energy because he's exhausted ( my baby </3 ) but i also do think he thinks they taste good. i think he fucks with that ultra watermelon flavor that just tastes like the most beautiful, delectable, mouth watering liquid watermelon candy ever. i also think he could rock with the strawberry or the peach one sounds dank.

if the watermelon one isn't there it does stress him out, but he has a mental list of what one is next on the tier list, and acts accordingly. its kind of a nice change of pace but...his brain does not think that. however, when kyle is healing, weirdly enough, i think he ACTUALLY LIKES???? those coffee flavored ones??? which is Insane and everyone including tweek points and laughs at him

i hope...that suffices? you're totally welcome to offer me what you think is the right answer: you're the monster expert, after all. but this is what i feel in my heart! i think it feels accurate but, lmk! :')

and also...speaking of my job. UUUUUUGH. thank you baby. :((( i am actually criminally depressed because my fucking HOE-WORKER fucking extended his vacation ONE MORE WEEK! so i have to cover all his shifts for an extra week while he's on vacation. so that means i don't get to watch my testing accommodation kids who i miss very much, i still don't get his kinder reccess shift and literally??? spring break is next week like he couldn't WAIT???? holy fuck i'm Sad. :(

but i will be fine darling. but it's actually why i wanted to see if you could send me another anon so i can use that anon to talk about trans stan journey stuff? i just don't want it to get lost in this post and also, i'm not in great spirits rn and don't want to answer it until i can write something that's not flaming garbage.

but happy late birthday baby, i'm so glad you were born. <333

-uncle nina, monster shot gun queen

p.s. what is your favorite monster energy? :)

#BB IF YOU CALL YOUR MESSAGE STUPID ONE MORE TIME #I AM GOING TO PUT YOU IN SO MANY BLANKETS AND FEED YOU SO MANY SNACKS AND BRAID UR HAIR #KNOCK IT AWHFF!!!!!! #you are so loved and this was no stupid at all and i actually had a lot of fun reading all about all the monster flavors #i'm sorry if its not totally accurate i did my best #i'm sorry the green one is so much more pep stan #and the mango loco one is actually raven #like thats just the right answer #ravenstan drinking the mango loco monster w the tajin rim...like he's kind of a genius oh my god #him turning them into a cursed mixed drink is foul tho i just know his head hurts after that #i cant believe i had jersey likes the coffee ones that is so foul #but him drinking the no sugar ones and drinking the candy flavored ones bc he is like 7 years old #theyre so cute lkahdkshd also kyle pile also likes the cherry blade lemonade bang energy that feels right to me #BUT YEAH I HOPE THIS MADE YOU SMILE #TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK HAHA #also sorry i didnt give you the Serious answer in that post but ravens trans journey is really important to me #and i really want to honor that and not rush it or write it when i am in a bad mood...ill make it worth it for you my love #but uuuugh no im in such a bad mood like im actually so frustrated like this is just not fair to me #me n the older kids are starting to kind of be alright but it kind of ebbs and flows like its better somedays and worse others #but they are stuck with just me for another week so were managing tbh my coworker was dad and im mom basically #im more like stepmom and they dont really like me bc ur not my real mom but like at least im nice lmao #but yeah happy birthday baby hope you enjoyed this and i will get you the answers you seek very soon mWAAAAH #also not me shotgunning 3 bang energies and throwing up and having to have my friends email my professors #when i tell you im not a role model i mean that i am a joke i make such bad decisions #live fast die young bad girls do it well

[stereax]

woohoo spiraling out of control right now (what else is new really I've been fucked up and spiraling for weeks now) and trying to figure out reasons not to delete my tumblr and discord and myself along the way

but you know. talking about myself on my blog automatically means I'm attention seeking and fishing for pity right? should just shut up and stick to the news eh, it's all I'm good for :D

anyway if you need me I'll be in the corner reliving the past, coming to terms with reality, and trying to convince myself I'm not the problem despite every indication to the contrary ✌︎︎

#sterechats :) #09:58 pm - this is a bad idea but scheduling it anyway #what's the worst that can happen really? everyone leaves again? nobody talks to me again? #probably gonna delete this in the morning so. meh. not like it matters not like I matter :D #10:29 pm - wow it feels like my head is on fire #like my brain is actually burning and I can't do a damn thing about it #I should be happy right now! the devils are winning! my favorite guys are scoring! #but no! I'm barely keeping it together around my family and praying I don't wake up tomorrow <3 #11:00 pm - I need to get out of here #I need to get out of here out of here out of here I can't stay here any more this is killing me #everyone hates me and I need to chew my arms open maybe then everything will make sense #why am I even writing these tags what does it matter #I was so much more in control of myself when I was sh-ing #maybe I should get back to that maybe it'll help I don't know anymore #I just want my friends back but they hate me hahahaha #11:24 pm - wonder how many people are gonna block me after this one #how many people will finally be fed up and leave for good #everyone leaves and I should be used to this by now #here's a truck stop instead of saint peter's (yeah yeah yeah yeah) #11:41 pm - it's friday afternoon/there goes antigone to be buried alive #in the next world I want to be something useful/like a staple gun/or in love #I would fall off a cliff for you/a thousand times and call it a good day #maybe I'm just incapable of being human! maybe that's it! #maybe I'm not even human at all... but something worse instead... #1:22 am - moving the posting of this back from 3 to 6 am #not that that matters and not that I matter but I don't think I'll sleep #and I don't want this to post when I'm awake #I know I'm just going to get unfollowed and blocked and left behind as always #because happiness and good things and friendships just aren't things I get to have really #I just wish people would stop lying and telling me they're different and they'll stay when they're not different and won't stay

[cinnamon-phrog]

How's your day going on tumblr

My day has only just started [EST timezone you see, I am so sorry if I'm incomprehensible] but it's going well, thank you!

I was a bit sad because I chose to give the benefit of the doubt to someone someone else was being mean to, but the person I gave the benefit too turned out to be exactly who I hoped they weren't.

That red x yellow shipper turned out to be a pr*shipper but just didn't say it, a friend of mine told me about their gross twitter acc, as well as the other shipper who sided with them. The only thing they're right about is yes it does indeed look like it's 2022 again :c

It makes me sad to see nothing but gatekeepers and pr*shippers in the dhmis tag so I'm just going to not bother looking anymore, you all had your chances.

It's very messy and has upset me for a bit, but I went offline to go to town and I felt much better!!

[I go off a lot more in the tags- like a LOT a lot. A sort-of vent/complaint but not an ooooooh look at me vent just a few things that've happened in the past that made me who I am now]

#i get worried that i complain too much so i try to bring the positive. because there IS always a positive #i bought a froggie eye mask for one. it matches my 5 quid frog snuggie <3 #and i got a free blocklist yayyyyyyy happy days #it's sad that most people who i think might be like me and see the trio as ageless/adults and wholesomely ship them turn out to be prroshit #but i keep looking! i know two or three who have but got chased away by the gatekeepers who mistook them for proshits #i honestly don't blame them for being so mean now. anyone could be anything and it's hard to know if it's not directly stated #and i used to assume a lot. i still do but i want to use my assuming to assume good #and i think i only caught my assuming bug from others since i came into the dhmis fandom quite young [sadly] #god 2022 was bad. at least june-august felt like it's never end. gross people everywhere and i had to be an agony aunt to 20+ year olds- #when i was only 15. actually who fucking does that. i'd gone through the worst of the toxicity #forced to see yellow as a child or i was afraid i'd be excluded. treated weird when i admitted it. a good friend turned out to be a pr*. #i felt i HAD to get involved or i'd be told i wasn't doing enough. i was a child. a baybee. i just wanted silly puppets and to be funny #now i worry i'll be 'called out' for nothing and everyone is two faced #can't try to make dhmis mutuals without checking their blog and seeing how mean they are to people like me #and it's so stupid. you guys can all be so stupid. i can't make friends because of you because i'm afraid #everytime i post art or gush about the characters that bring me a comfort you wouldn't believe i worry i'll be told off from it. #i talked about yellow once on my old sideblog and some bitch whined about how i felt for him and how it was wrong #how they told their friends and they all agreed i was a freak for it. it's not that dramatic. not everyone sees him as a baby #like what was the point of that. maybe check my blog and you'll know how i see him. #i'm glad someone came to my defence. #someone once got into a post i made for fun which explained how i saw him and oh boy they infantilised him and went off- #about how he's their baby brother. good for you /gen but can you do that somewhere else i love your art i know your famous but that's no- #excuse. i see more popular palatable artists get away with worse shit like this and it's saddening and i make sure to get away from it. #it's hard when i want to see art of my loves and only see two of them together. it's bittersweet and feels incomplete. #without them i feel incomplete. finding them was like finding three quarters of me that were lost to make me whole. #i bought badges of the trio on etsy and i lost the yellow one. i sobbed. i had to be consoled. i couldn't even do my math exams #because i got a taste of what a life would be where just one peice was missing. #any moment any of them can be taken away from me. that's selfish because they're not even mine and they're not even real. #i went off a bit. i AM happy. i am on my way to be happy. that's just something i needed to get off my chest

[welcometogrouchland]

for the toh reqs~

SIBLING GAME NIGHT SIBLING GAME NIGHT!!!!!!!!!

anyway hope you are having a lovely day!!!!!!!! ty bestie🙏🙏🙏🙏💕💖

[ID: a comic featuring the cast of the owl house, split into two images. The first image shows King holding a pair of uno cards, looking up to the left- towards Luz, who we see in a cut-in-half close up panel of her face, holding three cards in a dramatic fashion. Her face is in shadow and sparkles appear around her eyes. Paralleling her in the other corner is a panel of hunter, holding yellow cards and sweating nervously.

The next image is two rectangular panels of hunter and Luz sitting across from each other with king in the middle, all three of them playing cards. In the background is Gus, Willow and Amity (who is saying "go Luz!"). The first panel is silent, until in the second panel, Luz says "draw 5" with a smug expression. Hunter stands up angrily, his cards flying in the air, and yells "IT IS NOT LEGAL TO DO THAT FOUR TIMES IN A ROW, HUMAN!". king says "haha, yes it is! Loser boy has lost again!" Gus summons a puff of illusion smoke with a scoreboard on it reading "L: 12, H: 0". Amity is cheering and willow summons the word, "R.I.P (again)" in vines and flowers next to hunter. The background is colored with peaches and oranges. End ID]

Frantically ignoring the implications of todays ep. Incredibly funny to me how these bitches ended up actually being siblings

#the owl house #toh #luz noceda #hunter toh #king toh #feels immoral to tag other characters/ships when it's just in the bg so i shan't #this comic was in the ugly phase for a LONG time but for my first toh comic I'm actually really happy?? #I've drawn luz the most out her king and hunter but i also change how i draw her everytime so uh. net zero progress there if Im honest? #but i like how i went abt things here! also loved drawing hunter. i always make his hair very feathery on accident but it's appropriate so #and i love getting to draw hooked noses i love hooked noses and broken noses. yes I'm biased (i.e have a bumpy nose). I'm proud #I ALSO HATE HOW KING IS LITERALLY MADE UP OF BASIC SHAPES IN ORDER TO MAKE HIM EASY TO DRAW. AND HE'S STILL REALLY HARD 😭 #didn't do like. excellent here? but I'm happy enough for our purposes!! #uhh fun details: #i think it's fun how between king being edas son Luz being her kid and hunter being a clone of her great great etc grandad. #they r literally related. wild #and also i didn't get to include it here because my brushes only go so small but me and my friends play uno/jack changes- #-with a mixed deck of uno cards regular playing cards and custom cards we made out of paper #it's a nightmare game called kiss kiss that combines all the rules we know from both games and i think the hexsquad would love it <3 #anyway- thank you for the rec!! enjoy :]

[wikagirl]

seeing one of my mutuals post about their psych eval experience and having one of my irls real time texting us updates from a psychward is kinda making me nervous about my own neurodivergency screening in two weeks

#not gonna name drop or tag your bc if peeps wanna know the details about you they gotta follow you my friend #but yeah healthcare systems are known for diganosing afab folks with literally anything except a form of neurodivergency #they'll give you a diganosis of ptsd combined with 4 flavours of anxiety and depression and call you hormonal five times #before even considering that you could be autistic or have adhd #and at least over here in germany it took me literally 3 years of hunting to find a clinic that would even do an eval on me #because they usually only take kids up to 16 and if you're older than that and not diagnosed allready youn are basicly fucked #but my guy seemed pretty nice about and basicly instantly said that I'd get a second apppintment #the moment i mentioned that literally all my friends are either adhd or autistic or both and ther eis no fucking way I'm not #also all of them except one are depressed as shit simply from existing like most of us don't even have trauma or anything like that #it's just the exhaustion of living in a world that is simply not made for you #and we're all pretty sure that the only reason why the one of us isn't depressed is bc she lives in her own head so much #that she blocks everything else out which may sound bad but it keeps her happy and so far also pretty healthy and successfull #so we don't care and we or at least I try my best to not bother her with my issues too much to keep her that way #sometimes being delulu is the solulu

[clemencetaught]

and we'll find some version of okay, one day ( ft. myungdae & hyuk || verse two )

a/n: did someone say hyurick? today is alex ( @jeoseungsaja )'s birthday SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRIENDO :DDDD thank you so much for the all the wonderful stories, muses, smiles, and laughs u've given me ( and all ur friends and ppl on dash ) over the years; i hope this trip around the sun will be a happy one for you!! care you lots <3 &lt;3 <3

Being in a relationship with Hyuk is surprisingly easy.

No, easy, isn’t the right word. ‘Easy’ implies a lack of effort to make what is between them now. ‘Easy’ implies what they have is intuitive when it is anything but. Hindsight is 20/20- it becomes more apparent to Myungdae that perhaps the last five years didn’t have to be as painful.

( He could have told Hyuk what was happening from the beginning. He could have revealed himself to Hyuk when he arrived in Seoul. He could have taken a moment and realized that perhaps keeping this undertaking to himself was only going to cause more grief for all parties involved. Maybe then, Hyuk wouldn’t have gotten fatally stabbed. Maybe Hyuk wouldn’t dissociate, wouldn’t be considered invalid in the eyes of the public, having ‘lost the plot’. The should-haves and could-haves echo in Myungdae’s ears like his ghosts and if Myungdae thinks too hard about it, they’ll start piling the guilt one on top of another, like the stack of essays he still hasn’t graded. And when that happens, the stacks will climb higher and higher like Icarus until it inevitably burns and falls- )

So being in a relationship with Hyuk is not easy.

But it is simple.

Their relationship reminds Myungdae of a heist, except not as nearly meticulously calculated. But the principle is ultimately the same- watch your back and watch your partner’s back. If your partner needs help, even if you can’t do anything, be there for them. Or in Myungdae’s case, in the aftermath.  Wounds are like cats- easy to see, harder to catch in the moment.

Of course, simply being there is a plan too vague for the Black Knight’s standards. It’s a concept with one too many external factors and one too many uncertainties to consider.

And yet somehow, their relationship works.. Actually, it might be even more painless than any heist. Sure, the obstacles come unexpectedly, but the solutions don’t require nearly as much finesse. As a matter of fact, the most effective solutions to their obstacles are much…simpler. Less thinking, more doing in the moment.

For example, Myungdae needs to bolt? Well he can do it, but Hyuk’s going to have to follow him or at the very least find his hiding spot once the smoke bomb has cleared up. Hyuk needs space after an episode of derealization? Catch Myungdae lingering just around the corner, waiting to be let in. Myungdae doesn’t mind the wait either.

He’s always been good at abiding for time- most times.

There’s still more to figure out about each other though. It’s not like they can go back five years. And no single conversation is going to give Myungdae everything he needs to know about his dear…friend? Partner?

( Myungdae decides he’s not going to think about that right now- he’s also not going to say anything about it to anyone. Nell and Alfred already have their suspicions, and god forbid if Quinn and Taiyang found out. Myungdae already wants to stab the latter two whenever they cross paths. And he doesn’t need one more tempting reason. Not that he thinks Hyuk would mind too much- okay, maybe Hyuk would. A quirk of being part of law enforcement, but no one’s perfect. )

Besides, Hyuk reveals himself in layers- like a book, one page at a time. It’s an incorrect metaphor, the open book one, Myungdae can’t help but think. An open book implies all the facts and details laid out, plain and easy to interpret. That’s no book. Or at least not a novel- to read a novel and understand it in its entirety takes more than one read-thru. It takes turning one page at a time, studying every scene and word to comprehend how it contributes to the whole, making careful annotations in the margins, and recalling the most vivid of phrases and moments to truly know a book.

And isn’t that what Myungdae and Hyuk have been doing all this time?

Granted, once more, that isn’t to say it’s been easy. Old habits are, well, the cliché could not be more accurate- old habits die hard. Like how Hyuk still zones out for hours on end without saying a word to anyone and how he’s given up on art in favor of reading and rereading files with yellowed papers on cases that have lost relevance years ago. Or how Myungdae refuses to show skin in front of anyone and how he barely reads and  reads only for necessity.

Or how they both still have nightmares. 

Sharpened teeth need to sink in somewhere. If not someone else, then themselves. Maybe those habits will never die. Maybe even if they have each other, they’ll never be okay, never be whole once more.

Nevertheless-

“Your hair’s getting long,” Myungdae murmurs, hand carding through Hyuk’s hair. It’s a Sunday at an hour too early to be awake and of course, they’re in Hyuk’s office. Myungdae didn’t sleep well the previous night and he suspects it’s the same for Hyuk, from the way he couldn’t stop moving. Or the way Myungdae heard him gasp in the middle of the night, only to curl a little tighter against him on the sofa bed.

( Of the new couch- the old one, that two seater with deflated green cushions and scratchy fabric that must have been repurposed from a potato sack, Hyuk had replaced not too long ago. Myungdae won’t admit that he likes the new one- a three seater with chenille fabric that can fold out into a bed- more now that he’s had time to get accustomed. )

Hyuk grumbles, head in Myungdae’s lap. “It already is.” His arm loosely draped around Myungdae’s waist, Hyuk peeks up at him. Myungdae can see the lines under sleep deprived eyes.  “Do you like actually being a pigeon? It’s too early, Dae-yah.” A warm hand finds purchase on Myungdae’s hip as Hyuk groans, groggy. “Lie down.” 

Next to me, Myungdae can hear from the breeze blowing in. The lilies of the valley on the window sill jingle, tinkling and singing.

“You should get it trimmed.” Myungdae says instead, fingers tangling themselves between the strands of hair. They’re smooth. Fresh-smelling too like his shampoo. “It’ll get in your way.”

Hyuk flips to his back and looks up at Myungdae. “Don’t need to.”

“It falls over your eyes when you’re reading.” An observation, on Myungdae’s part. Hyuk grumbles.

“Doesn’t matter.” Which is translation for ‘I’m fine’. But Myungdae knows this is Hyuk’s way of saying, ‘I don’t want to.’

‘I can’t.’ 

Myungdae tilts his head, thinking as his fingers knead down to the scalp. What would make Hyuk steer away from hairdressers? How does this connect to the full picture of his dear friend now?

There are still so many things he has to learn about Lee Hyuk.

“...What If I did it?”

Hyuk raises a brow and suddenly, the window where the lilies of the valley sit looks very tempting to jump through.  It would take him, say, eleven seconds to through the window if he doesn’t grab his jacket with the smoke bombs along the way. 

“Do you even know how to cut hair?” Hyuk asks. It’s not a ‘yes’ but it’s not a ‘no’ either. 

It’s a silly overreaction, Myungdae realizes he just had. Myungdae could ask Hyuk a question and Hyuk would give him the truth. This is the way it’s always been- they don’t, or rather they can’t lie to each other. Sooner or later, the truth comes out and that’s a lesson Myungdae has been learning the hard way. 

They probably need to have a conversation about that sooner or later.

But once again, it is a Sunday at an hour way too early to be awake. This time, they can take the detour. Hyuk might think there’s no time like the present these days, but Myungdae is more than content to take the roundabout way.

“If I can use a sword, a pair of scissors can’t be any worse.” Myungdae says. It’s a half-lie. Hyuk still looks at him skeptically. “I’ll cut straight- you won’t lose more than a few inches.”

Hyuk huffs, a loose strand still landing in front of his eyes. Myungdae tucks it behind his ear. “...I’ll think about it. But on one condition-” Myungdae yelps. Rolling off of his lap, Hyuk half-coaxes, half-wrestles him into the spot next to him. Alarm rolls in, only to recede once Hyuk’s hand presses against his back and Myungdae is once more face-to-face with his dear friend.

“We rest for longer.” Hyuk finally finishes, triumphant.

“We’ll have to get up soon.” Myungdae points out. “Nell is no good in the kitchen. Hiro’s going to complain.”

Hyuk huffs. “They can wait a few hours. Who gets up at six on a Sunday morning, huh? Huh?”

Myungdae snorts, a hand carding through Hyuk’s hair, his fingertips padding against his scalp. Hyuk leans into it and sighs in approval. “Okay. Just a few more hours then. We can get up later.” 

Yes, between the two of them, they still have a lot of problems and no actual solutions: ANACHRON is still at large, Hyuk’s caseload never dies down, and the Black Knight still has heists to execute. 

Hyuk still zones out and Myungdae still doesn’t relax for any occasion. But at the same time, Hyuk doodles more now and his derealization episodes come around less often. And Myungdae sometimes wears short-sleeved shirts and will even pick up a short story to read for leisure.

It’s not quite perfect, but it’s progress.

The lilies of the valley tinkle in the sunlight. Myungdae presses closer to Hyuk- maybe they’ll never go back to the way they were before, maybe they’ll never have something easy, but if they have each other, they can be something like okay, one day.

.

.

.

fin.

#turn your lies into truths for you ( hyuk — verse two. ) #the knight ( verse two. ) #jeoseungsaja #ALEX!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRIEND!!!! #pls accept this little something from me <3 <3 <3 #i'm so so SO grateful to be able to call you my friend and to be considered ur friend #and i'm very sure many of your partners ( and our mutuals ) would agree!! #absolutely a joy to see whether ic or ooc; WRITE WITH ALEX OR FACE MY 🔪🔪🔪 #( i borrowed it from myungdae he said 'talk to my b(f)f or i'll 🔪🔪🔪 you' JFLKSDJFLSKDJF JKJK ) #of course this is hyurick themed - this year i gave myungdae the chance to talk #and he?? ran with it <3 #i put this in the future when they get together/are reunited #so i hope it's okay that i jumped a bit in the timeline <3 #of course nothing here has to be considered canon....i was also just thiinking about the haircut thingy we talked about once #AND THIS?? happened :'D #ANYWAYS MOST IMPORTANTLY!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEX MY DEAR FRIEND <3 <3 <3 #i hope 2day is a wonderful day 4 you and that you get to relax a lot with friends and family/doing the things you want to do <3 #and if not i will curbstomp the fates 😤😤😤 #OKAY HAVE A WONDERFUL BESTEST BIRTHDAY OKAY??? :DDD

[slytherinslut0]

MATTHEO RIDDLE ONESHOT- We Aren’t Over

VOTERS RESULT FROM MY POLL<3 XOXO ENJOY

Info: FWB gets jealous seeing you kiss another guy at a party after the two of you had called things off.

Word count: 4.5k

Tags: 18+, PURE SMUT, PIV, FWB, Praise Kink, Degradation Kink, Begging, Teasing, Jealousy, Threats of Violence, Good Sex

"You look so fucking sexy..."

large hands belonging to an admittedly handsome Ravenclaw student that you failed to acquire the name of gripped your hips; firmly pulling you against his tall body as his lips grazed your ear, hot whiskey breath washing over you, intoxicating you even further than you already were.

One hand slid around to your ass, gripping a palmful of the plump flesh over the fabric of your Slytherin uniform skirt. Your breath hitched in your throat as he nipped your earlobe, teeth tugging gently on your emerald earring, his voice a low reverberation down your spine.

"I'd love to rip that awful fucking uniform off of you and get a taste of what you're hiding under there..."

Your cheeks burned, warmth flooding you as you chewed on your lip, bringing your mouth toward his own ear now as the two of you could hardly hear yourselves think amidst the blaring music coming from the speakers in the out-of-control Friday night Slytherin party, green flashing lights blurring your vision further than the alcohol was as you squinted to try and get a better glimpse of his face.

In your intoxicated state, you couldn't recognize this guy for the life of you. The only thing that gave away his Ravenclaw status was his uniform.

"I'd be careful with your next words there, little Raven," you purred, your unsteady fingers finding his shoulders. "I promise you, you'll regret coming into my house and disrespecting my emblem like that..."

Gods, you were fucking hammered, but since you and your friends-with-benefits had called things off last weekend; you'd been desperate to find someone new to hopefully satisfy you just as well as he did--but admittedly, your hopes were low.

Not many boys knew your body like the back of their hand, or knew exactly how to drive you sexually insane, the way Mattheo fucking Riddle did.

"Is that so?" His grip on your body tightened, a deep groan leaving his throat as he pressed his lips to your jaw. "I'm not quite sure a poor little serpent like you is any match for a big bad raven like me..."

"You'd be surprised," you retorted, slowly threading your fingers through his thick brown hair. "It's been proven that even the most intelligent birds couldn't elude the cunning serpent's snare..." you tilted your head, smirking. "But go on, underestimate me...that'll be fun."

His eyes widened, the darkness inside his pupils boring into you, drowning you in their endless voids. Your stomach twisted as your sight locked in with his, and you took a moment to analyze his features a little better. Gods, he looked so fucking much like Mattheo.

Why was it that you could never seem to get that fucking guy out of your head?

You were convinced that you were going to die one day with his gorgeous fucking face still haunting you--those dark penetrating eyes, that devilish, seductive smirk--that messy mop of chocolate curls that sat effortlessly adorable over his forehead. Fuck, you hated him.

You hated him for fucking you so good you couldn't stop fucking thinking about him; even after the endless bickering and arguing the two of you had been going through over the last few weeks, causing a consensual end to your hookups--you hated him for occupying your mind even while you were pressed up against an undeniably sexy new guy, who clearly had a deep interest in you, who clearly wanted to fuck you until your legs gave out.

You should be happy right now, you should be overly fucking ecstatic, practically brimming with relief as the Ravenclaw guy leaned in, pressing his lips to yours and capturing your mouth in a sloppy, intoxicated kiss; his tongue slipping past your teeth as his hands gripped your ass with enough force to bruise--you should be completely fucking overjoyed as your lids fluttered shut, your mouths working over the others with a little too much desperation as you stood in the middle of the crowded common room, fervent fingers gripping onto each other as though your lives depended on it.

You should be happy, but you're not.

When you broke the kiss, the Ravenclaws brows furrowed, but before he had a chance to ask you to his dorm, and in a hopeful attempt at subtly saving yourself, you brought your lips toward his ear, trying to sound as sexy and inconspicuous as possible. "Why don't you get us some drinks?"

When he smirked, nodding in agreement, he graced your ass with one last squeeze before he spun around, making his way across the room and heading toward the bar station. You watched him as he went, and as soon as he had disappeared within the sea of inebriated bodies; you let out a long, exasperated breath; spinning on your heel to quickly make your way to the bathroom and away from that spot before he returned.

Sure, you felt bad for ditching him like that, but he was just as drunk as you were. He'd forget you even existed by the morning.

As you shoved your way through the endless amounts of drunk, sweaty bodies, you'd almost successfully broke through the crowd when a strong, firm grip wrapped around your wrist; hot breath washing over your neck as a tall body pressed against your backside--a height so towering and presence so intoxicating you already knew, without hearing his voice or seeing his face, that it could only be one fucking man.

"Where you headed, princess?" Mattheo's deep, husky drawl rolled through your eardrums like honey; a slow, thick, and admittedly fucking seductive pitch. "You're not really going to ditch that poor bastard after getting him going like that, are you?"

You turned your head, trying to glimpse him over your shoulder, fighting to hide your smirk. "I don't see how that's any of your business, Riddle."

"Ouch...one week without my cock and we're already back to second name basis, huh?" His grip tightened, his body heat enveloping you, his plush lips pressed tight against your ear. "I'm just surprised...you looked like you were enjoying yourself."

"Stalking me, are you?" You scoffed, trying to pry your wrist from his hold but he tightened his grip even further, other hand snaking around to your hip. "Is the big heartless Riddle boy jealous?"

He chuckled, and you could almost see the smirk on his lips. The feeling of his chest rumbling against your back did inexplicable things to your cunt. Gods, you hated how you were already fucking melting for him and you haven't even taken one single look at his face.

"Were you thinking about me?" He purred, teeth nipping at your ear, the arrogance in his tone igniting flames in your veins. "When his tongue was halfway down your fucking throat, were you wishing it was mine?"

"Give me a break, Mattheo." Your head was spinning, oxygen evaporating; but you knew you needed to play it off. "Don't fucking flatter yourself."

"You know you love the things I fucking did to you..." by this point his voice was a low growl, his tone so deep and dark in your ear it sent shudders skittering down your spine. "You know you'll search for me in every single sad sack you try to distract yourself with."

Heat flashed your face, his fingers digging into your hip with enough force to bruise. "Jealous of a Ravenclaw...must be a tough pill to swallow for the Slytherin prince-"

When his teeth sunk into your earlobe with enough force to basically tell you to shut up without actually saying it, you yelped--eyes fluttering shut as he tugged you back against him with added force.

"Keep talking, princess, and I won't hesitate to walk over there and rearrange his fucking face..." he spat the words through barred teeth, your bones shaking with the deep vibration. "Do you even know his name? Huh? Do you even know who the fuck he is?"

Gods, you were cursing yourself. As if you were about to fold for this man after he'd basically told you to fuck off and leave him alone no less than a week ago. Your brain knew, above all else, that what you were about to do was completely fucking wrong--but your cunt paid no mind to your brains protests. Your cunt wanted Mattheo Riddle.

"No, Matty, I don't..." you whispered, tilting your head to give him better access to you neck. "Lots of night left, though...I'm sure I'll be quite familiar with it when I'm screaming-"

He sunk his teeth into your neck now, forcing a sharp squeal from your lips--another commanding gesture to silently warn you that if you kept talking, he was going to fucking lose it. Part of you hoped he would.

"What have I told you about saying my fucking name like that, princess..." he growled, licking a flat strip up the side of your throat. Fuck, you loved that tongue. That skilled, tentative fucking tongue. "And if you keep talking like that, the only thing you'll be screaming is for me to stop when I'm beating his fucking face into the floor..."

His words made you fucking shudder, a full body tremor against his built chest, entirely unable to control yourself now. The need between your thighs was becoming more insistent by the second, and at this point--you were at a complete loss for words; your lips involuntarily uttering the one word you knew you'd never forget how to say, regardless of how speechless you were.

His name. "Mattheo..."

"There she is..." he murmured, the praise in his tone making your breath hitch in your lungs. "Aren't you glad you met me? I know you got me stuck inside your memory..."

Long fingers slipped under the fabric of your shirt, grazing over your stomach. Bodies were everywhere, drunk students around you paying absolutely no mind to the intoxicated sins the two of you were about to commit.

"No," you uttered, so quiet you weren't even sure if he'd heard it. "I want you out of my fucking head..."

He purred in satisfaction, revelling in the fact you'd finally admitted to missing him. "Should've listened to me, princess...told you I was bad for you..."

More heat swarmed you, your thighs screaming; begging in need. "We can't keep doing this...it's so wrong, Matty..."

"But it feels so right, doesn't it?" His hand around your wrist snuck down to your hip, his other pressed against your stomach; pulling you tighter against his crotch--your breath evaporated when you felt his aggressive bulge against your ass. "Feel that, princess? That's what you fucking do to me..."

He pressed his lips to your pulse, teeth softly grazing over it, and you mewled; head falling back against his shoulder, body melting into his own--surrendering yourself to his intoxicating dominance just as you've done time and time before.

"I hate myself for letting you do this to me..." you breathed, head rolling to the side as his teeth worked purple possession marks into your skin. "I'm so stupid for you..."

"That's it, admit it, baby...admit that you missed this..." his grip tightened, tone thickened with lust. "You're my little devil, you know I'd sin for you..."

At his words, your entire body ignited into pure fucking flame, magma replacing the blood that flowed through your veins; threatening to melt your uniform and leaving you in nothing more than a pile of ash at his feet. You were done talking, you needed his fucking cock.

"Are we gonna quit the talking and do something about it then, hm?" You purred, tilting your head back to meet his eyes for the first time; your head spinning as you drowned in the dark hurricane of their desire. "Show me how you'd sin for me, Matty..."

"I'll show you, baby, I'll fucking show you..." he said, wetting his lips as he held your stare. "Your dorm or mine?"

Music to your fucking ears. "Yours."

Without another word, Mattheo gripped your wrist, his hold like a snake, slithering around you gently at first; slowly increasing its pressure until he'd cut the blood flow, threatening suffocation of your lungs and leaving you with only hungry, primal desire--eradicating all thoughts of just how horrible of an idea you knew this was. He dragged you out of the common room and toward his dorm, not sparing you a single glance as he ripped open the door and pulled you inside; slamming your back up against it as it closed, one hand snaking toward the lock and clicking it tight into place.

When he paused, two hands finding residence against the wood on either side of your head; not moving, only staring, it was as though the rest of the world faded away--and all that was left was the cunning, messy brown haired boy in front of you. His presence filled the room, suffocating you, stopping your heart mid-beat. He loomed over you, toes centimeters from your own, chest so close that you both would touch with a deep enough breath.

You scanned his body, heart pounding, palms sweating from the impending reality of your desire, and he smirked, leaning closer.

"I don't think I can allow another man to lay a fucking finger on you ever again..." he whispered. "I don't think that perfect fucking pussy can belong to anyone fucking else."

"Since when did it belong to you, Matty?" You shuddered, deciding to test him a bit. "I thought we were just casual-"

"You think anyone else could fuck you stupid like I do?" You could practically feel his fingernails digging into the wood beside your head, the anger building in his eyes. "How about your exes? How'd they fuck you, huh?"

Your throat tightened. "Mattheo-"

"Say it." He growled, leaning closer--so close your noses brushed. "You want me to make you fucking cum, princess? Say that little pussy is mine."

Gods, curse your fucking insatiable need to get fucked. At this point, you were fully cognizant of the fact that this man could make you say damned-near anything if it meant he'd get inside you. Swallowing your ego, you met his stare--as intense as it had ever felt--and licked your lips.

"It's yours, Matty..." you murmured. "It's all yours."

Mattheo Riddle smirked. "That's fucking right."

Unable to decide between indignant and patronized, you eschewed both, and instead opted to hook your fingers into his belt, pulling yourself into him while you boosted yourself on your tiptoes to meet his lips with your own. Your kiss was hungry and demanding as you sought to memorize his mouth with your tongue. Mattheo's large hands cupped your face, fingers delving into your hair while he pressed into you, forcing you back tighter against the door.

You groaned against his lips, writhing underneath him while you slid your tongue along his teeth, seeking to know every part of him, needing him to want you--to fucking need you like you needed him. Mattheo drew in a breath through his nose and pushed deeper, like he wanted to fuse you with the door, and your hands shot into his hair, a shiver running through you as you felt how soft, how luxurious it was between your fingers.

Another soft groan rumbled in your chest, and--having distant, fuzzy deja vu of the countless encounters prior--you wrapped the curly tendrils of his hair around your fingers and yanked it.

At that, a deep moan left his throat, and he pulled back, waves of harsh breath crashing over him. His blackened eyes darted across your face, switching between your lips and eyes. "Fucking naughty little thing..." he huffed, smirking.

"For you, always," you murmured, and he groaned, wetting his lips as he leaned closer.

"Fuck-that's right...I love it when you're bad...you only act this way for me, huh?" His voice was a low purr, warm breath crashing your face. "That why you didn't fuck him? That why you ran?"

Chewing your lip, you nodded, and tugged his hair again, bringing him to your mouth once more.

He smirked against you and his hands fell to your hips, roaming the swell of your curves before gripping the underside of your thighs and hiking you onto the door. Immediately, the aching length in his pants ground into your center while his tongue fought its way into your mouth. Without you having to think, your legs circled him, and your hips were grinding back, pursuing any friction and heat you could find.

You peeled away to catch a breath, hands resting in his hair, and his lips went to work on your neck, suckling and nibbling the skin there.

"Matty...please..." you murmured, already begging for something, anything. "I need you."

Snuffing a groan, Mattheos grip bruised your hips as he bucked into you, grinding you against the door.

"You want me to fuck you, slut?" he said, breath hot on your neck. "Didn't get enough of my cock last time?"

"No-fuck-I didn't," you mewled, a slight embarrassment washing over you. "It's never enough."

Mattheo growled, his grip hardening to iron, and he licked a warm, wet line along your pulse. "That's right...that's what I like to hear..."

Sinking his teeth into your neck, he pushed off the door, walking over toward his bed as he held you against his chest. You watched the door get further and further away, lust building and growing in your chest as he nipped your jawline before grazing his lips over yours again, softly and briefly as he reached the edge of his mattress and laid you back against it.

When you hit the bed, he kept his mouth on yours while his hands left your waist; fervent fingers finding the fabric of your button up blouse and untucking it from your skirt, cold hands slipping underneath and groping your tits through your bra--a deep groan leaving his chest as you bucked your hips up against his crotch; wanting him closer, needing him closer.

His hands slid back down, finding the hem of your skirt and flipping it up your stomach, wasting zero fucking time before he hooked his thumbs around the band of your thong and peeled them down your thighs. The minute you were exposed, you heard the clatter of his belt buckle hitting the floor, and your pussy throbbed.

"Matty..."

Mattheo chuckled, the weight of his stare resting on your naked pussy; wallowing in your clear desperation for him.

"Look at you," he murmured. "So fucking wet." He released a long breath--he was testing his own patience, now. "This perfect body can't help but to crave me..."

You groaned as he teased your inner thigh with one hand, the other working to peel his shirt off his torso in one swift movement--exposing his hard, firm fucking abs and leaving him looming before you in just black briefs--looking as delicious and sexy as you've ever goddamn seen him.

As his long fingers ghosted over your folds, you arched, groaning when he brushed past it toward the inside of your other thigh; squirming in slight frustration, admittedly the teasing was absolutely getting to you now.

"Mattheo, I swear to-"

A firm, sharp smack to the sensitive skin of your inner thigh stopped the words in your throat; your stomach twisted as you watched Mattheo's eyes darken and lips curl sadistically.

"Is that how I taught you to ask for what you want?" He sneered, wetting his lips as he met your pleading eyes. "You know what I want to hear, princess."

You winced, swallowing your pride furthermore, until it was eroding in your stomach acid. "Please, Matty...please make me cum..."

His lips parted. "Good girl.”

His hum of approval was followed by the warm kiss of his fingertips along the sensitive lips of your pussy, feathersoft at first, and then one thick finger slipped between your folds, gliding between them, slicking itself with your wetness and grazing the swollen nub of your clit. That did it--blinded with relief, you cracked, moaning deep in your chest. Blood flushed your face, tingling your cheeks.

"You like that?" He brushed the bundle of nerves again, earning another shuddered groan. "You like the way I touch you? The way that pretty pussy responds to me?"

"Yes...Gods, yes..." you replied, the sentence coming without thought.

"That's right..." his free hand wrapped around the back of your thigh, tugging you closer to the edge of the bed, fingers swirling around your clit in tight circles, and you gasped, your mouth dropping in bliss, your rapid panting filling the steamy air.

"Fuck you're so sexy, my dirty little whore in her short little uniform skirt..." a stifled groan cut through his throat, and you shot a glance at him; one hand rubbing his strained erection through his boxers. "It took everything I had not to bend you over the fucking desk in class all week...fuck you know how to test me..."

You cried out, your pussy clenching, craving to be filled by him. "Matty, fuck-please..."

"Please what?" He growled.

Gods, curse him--curse him to bloody hell. You couldn't fucking handle this anymore. You knew he was punishing you, making you fucking beg and shatter and cry for it after what you'd done; and the way his fingers stroked your clit had you spasming, jerking--so close to cumming, you just wanted him inside you.

"Please." You banished all pride and ego and fucking common sense to the perimeter of your mind. Asylum. Just this once. "Please, fuck me...please."

"Tell me I'm the only one." He hissed, slipping a finger inside your wet, throbbing core; your back arching off the mattress as his thumb increased its pace on your clit. "Tell me you'll never let another man put his fucking hands on what's mine."

A cyclone was roaring in your brain, tearing apart coherent trains of thought with primitive, physical clamoring. Your response was pieced together by the efforts of your need for release alone.

"Fuck-no, never, Matty...I'm yours...all fucking yours..."

He was staring at you, face blank, surveying you while you twitched and jerked underneath his ministrations. His focus switched between your pussy--desperately throbbing and melting against his touch--and your red, sweating face, jaw slack from your haze of pleasure. You chewed your lip--it was bruised by now, certainly--clenching hard, and he groaned, pulling his boxers down to let his thick, needy cock spring free.

"Cum for me, slut." He ordered. "Cum for me right fucking now."

As if controlled by a remote in his hands, a tidal wave of euphoria slammed into you, walls pulsing, body wracked with the convulsions of an aggressively pent up orgasm, vision whiting out as you threw your head back, a loud string of unintelligible curses flying from you. Mattheo hummed, hand working you to the end of your orgasm as his free one slowly stroked his cock, watching every tiny ministration of your face with an exasperated expression until he was certain you were past it.

And when he was, he wasted no fucking time before he gripped your ankles in his hands, staring down at you as he began to rock his hips; his hard, throbbing dick sliding between your slit.

"Tell me you want it," he purred. "Beg for it."

You groaned. "Please, I want it Matty…I want you so fucking bad."

With a goddamn suffocatingly arrogant and devilish grin, he braced himself as he sunk into your pussy; your wet walls swallowing his cock with ease as you let loose a long, satisfied moan--Mattheo sucked a breath in through his bared teeth as sheathed himself all the way inside your cunt, pausing there to feel you clench and adjust around him.

"So fuckin' tight..." he groaned, head bowing. "Fuck you feel so good around me."

Your eyes squeezed shut, your fingers finding Mattheo's hands until he gathered both of your wrists and pinned them above your head with just one of his, leaning over you to fuck you deep and hard as his free hand snuck down to your clit. Throttled cries of pleasure were leaking from you, your conscious slipping from reality as he pummelled your pussy like you deserved the pain.

"Fuck, yes," you practically screamed. "You fuck me so good Matty...so deep, fuck-" 

A deep snarl roared from Mattheo's chest, his grip on your wrists tightening while he fucked you deeper, harder, your body rocking from the power of his thrusts. You could feel his ragged breath on your face, knew without seeing him that he was above you, lips parted, pupils blown.

"Look at me," he growled. "Let me see those eyes as you fucking cum for me."

Groaning, you obeyed, lids fluttering open to meet his gaze. Mattheo was possessed, looking past you, through you, panting with every snap of his hips. You lost yourself in his stare, the rest of the room falling away, and his fingers moved faster over your clit, bringing you to that precipice once more. Little choked moans left you while your jaw hung slack, his cock pounding into you--then his fingers hit just the right spot, and the massive, asphyxiating pressure inside of you imploded. Mattheo watched you, not even blinking once.

You thought you kept your eyes open, but you weren't sure, because you whited out, spasming and convulsing as your orgasm wracked your every cell, your every nerve, taking you to a height you'd never been to, never thought existed. Distantly, you were aware of your cunt drawing out Mattheo's climax as he cursed and dug his teeth into your shoulder, fucking you harder as he spilled himself deep inside of you.

You hadn't realized what had happened until your spirit returned to your body and you felt the burn of hot, wet tears streaming down your cheeks--evidence of your relief--followed by Mattheo collapsing on top of you, cock buried still inside your pussy, and both of you drank in lungfuls of air, starved for it, your brains fuzzy with the static of euphoria. You both laid there for a moment, rapt in the descent back to reality, until he pushed himself up and pulled out, holding you firmly in his stare again.

As he began to piece his clothes back together, you gathered your composure, pulling yourself up and off his bed, fixing yourself back to some form of decency. As you swallowed, watching Mattheo latch up his belt, he met your eyes again; the dark lust slowly fading, being replaced by an unspoken emotion you couldn't attempt to name.

"This isn't over." He breathed, moving back toward you. "We aren't over."

When your lungs hitched, you nodded, admitting to yourself that you already fucking knew you couldn't live without that. Without him.

"No," you whispered. "We aren't."

#smut #fanfic #harry potter #mattheo x you #mattheo riddle smut #mattheoxreader #mattheo riddle #mattheoriddlesmut #riddle smut #theo riddle #mattheo x y/n #theoriddle #Theo smut #mattheo smut #mattheo riddle x y/n #mattheo riddle x you #mattheoriddle #mattheo riddle x reader #mattheo #mattheo fluff #matt riddle #mattriddlesmut

[inkskinned]

it is the first snow today. i think we should all have off work, even though it didn't stick. i think there should be 4 national holidays, one for each season. happy first snow, go home and make cookies. for spring it can be the first crocus. for summer the first lightning bug. for autumn, the first golden leaf. go home, kiss your dog, feed your cat (who is absolutely already-fed but somehow still starving.)

i think we should all take more showers together, but i mean that in the soft way. i mean it like taking a nap. two years ago i had 5 adult friends in my queen bed, all of us laying across each other, head over belly over thigh over hand. any time one of us would giggle, it would ripple over each of us, like pulling on a spiderweb. kim actually needed to nap and didn't get to sleep and i am still sorry for it even though this is one of my most precious memories.

i think we should all wash each other's hair, i mean. i walk my dog and i watch someone put up twinkle lights around their front porch. alex and i just moved, and i love the neighborhood. already so many of our new neighbors have stopped by to say hello. the nice lady downstairs also collects plants, like me. she gave us her number on a pink post-it note. i am trying to decide whether to make her cookies or brownies.

i am going through a very hard time. something bad happened this weekend that i do not wish to discuss. it is hanging over me. i think of the green ribbon, and the woman who had her throat cut. it feels like that sometimes, inside of my body. like i am walking and talking despite being half-corpsed. like i am hanging on by a ribbon, standing on some kind of cusp. i keep saying - at least it wasn't worse. we are so lucky it wasn't worse. the idea is river-rock smooth now, all the edges worried off.

in this very dark night - the sun sets by 3 now - people don't need to, but they try anyway. they paint the missing light into things. i have an embarrassing number of missed calls and texts, but i feel the love from them nevertheless - hey. if you need something, i'm here. i will bring you food/puzzles/anything. i got you.

i think we should all have a big group chat where we do errands with strangers. this week i got lost in a home depot, which is wild because i'm a lesbian and we are actually hatched in a lowe's lumber section. there were two other women in the whole store. we ended up shopping together, at first by accident (we all needed things in the same aisle), and then because, well, why not. one of the ladies was taller than me, so she pulled down the screws i needed. i am agile and have the personality of a raccoon, so they sent me after anything below 3 feet. we talked about holiday plans and never learned each other's names, but did learn all the drama about each other's families.

i am making you cupcakes, because i have so much affection i want to pour it into batter. you ask me if i am eating enough per meal. i wrap your gift twice, trying to do it prettily. i get excited to give it to you, just because i hope you'll be excited too.

my parents drive an hour just to see the new apartment and to do the parent thing; standing in the kitchen saying things like "oh you'll get so much use from this dishwasher" and "well, you could paint that" and "when your mother and i moved it was uphill both ways and in a snowstorm and of course your brother was an infant." my mother brought me a plant for housewarming. i always say i love you before she leaves.

i play dnd on tuesdays still, after all these years. we all keep that night free. at one point, between grad school and marriage and all of it, we had to have a serious discussion about how to keep it running. we will keep going, we decided eventually. just to see each other, even if we don't play - you are all important to me. sebastian is not prone to affection but last night he stole my usual sign off - i love you all, be good, he said. he was laughing.

i don't love the winter, actually. i like snow in theory, but i grew up in the north, and am too-familiar with the season of "mud and sludge". i don't like being cold. but i do love something kind of soft and rare: every year around this time, people remember oh yes. you and i are human together. and i have love to spare.

it is the first snow, and something in my heart is finally warm again. i have spent what felt like the last 18 months just going-through-the-motions. it has felt blank and immediate, like i would never actually feel again. that sounds extremely trite and stupid - but that is the boring and familiar experience of depression. life just washes up against your windows, and you watch it happening. you see things that should be lovely and affecting, and it just whispers too-thin. i was desperately uncreative. uninterested in my hobbies. unimpressed by my writing. i told my therapist, often, i don't know how to find hope again.

almost sheepishly, something strange and lovely is burning in my chest. i keep not-looking at it, worried it will scamper back into the shadows again. it is skittish and wild, but it is so warm i want to sink my hands into its fur and feel it breathing. i love-hate it: if it's real, it can hurt me when it leaves again. but i am icarus-born, sun-lover and poet: i can't help myself. despite my best intentions, i am falling in love with life again.

i am planning to make cookies for my friends. alex and i are going to go christmas tree shopping. we picked out matching dish towels last night, and they have little mushrooms on them.

i love you. it does come back. yes, even after a long time. even for you. i promise. keep trying. you will wake up and it will be a day you can smile about.

write me when you get there. we will take the day off of work, and i will wash your hair, and we will both be laughing.

#spilled ink #writeblr #pos #recovery #my brain is like - don't trust it!!!!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! we can't be wrong again!!!!!! #and im like. what if the sorrow is the thing that's wrong though. #what if this - this!!!!! - is the truth

[chuluoyi]

HAPPY MARRIAGE

- nanami kento x reader

“you don't deserve to be unhappy. and i don’t want to be unhappy, either.” you have always wondered where did you and kento go wrong. in the wake of your divorce, as you both returned to single lives, you and kento would come to realize what constitutes a happy marriage is... and it takes more than just love

genre: post-divorce angst, crack, misunderstandings, arguments, hurt/comfort, bestfriend!gojo is going to help your love life, and fluff in the end!

note: this fic... goes through a major change overnight after i was struck with a wholly different plot *sobs* and then i went through a major writing block for at least a week before i know what words i'm going to write :') anyways, this isn't really proofread so please forgive any typos to the anon who requested this and others, i do hope you'll enjoy it! tagging @tiredkitten as per request <3

listen to: today more than yesterday - kim jong kook

a part of 1K MILESTONE EVENT

series masterlist | oneshot masterlist

No divorce ever comes easy.

When couples enter into marriage, they do so with the dream of a lifelong bond filled with love and compassion. You too did once. And even until now, you still want that for yourself.

When you married Nanami Kento three years ago, you thought it was for eternity. He was your dream man, the only man you could see yourself with. He embodied everything that was just and righteous, and he was also kind man, who would always put you first, shielding you from any sort of harm.

Even if the source of that ‘harm’ turned out to be himself.

“You don't deserve to be unhappy. and I don’t want to be unhappy, either.”

Strangely, you didn't resent Kento that much, in the end. At that time, both of you had come to terms with it and you couldn't blame anyone. But now, six months later, as you sat in this shabby bar, downing shots of gin with your thoughts swirling in an alcohol-induced haze, your emotions were all over the place, and moreover, the presence of a certain clown before you was just particularly irksome, and you knew that he was someone you could blame—

“Gojo, you prick!”

Gojo raised one righteous eyebrow. "Who, me? Sorry, but I'm not your ex-husband?"

Gojo Satoru was the witness to several milestone in your life. Insufferable as he was, somehow you clicked with him ever since your early days as a jujutsu sorcerer. You remembered sending him your handpicked wedding invitation, having him celebrating your promotions, and then coming to him with tears running down your face in the middle of the night, telling him, “We are getting a divorce.”

"You!" you snapped, slamming down your glass of gin, whipping your head around to face the blindfolded idiot that was your longtime friend. Your index finger accusingly aimed at him. "This is all your fault!"

"Wha—"

"Because of you!"

"Okay, now it's clear that you're just too far gone—"

You hiccupped, your tone laced with fiery emotion. "If it weren't for you—if you hadn't been so adamant about setting us up back then—!"

Gojo grimaced. Ah, so this was the so-called drunken musings. While it was amusing to see his friend of 7 years in this state, even he couldn't deny how a tad bit pitiful you were.

"...then maybe," you started to deflate, eyes watering and lips trembling, sniffling. "I-I won't have to go through this..."

Correction, you were so pitiful you had no idea. But still, as a longtime associate, he couldn't bring himself to abandon you there, wallowing in your sorrows all alone.

He sighed and patted your back. "There, there... what about I introduce you to other guys, hmm? See if it'll lessen the pain away?"

You shot him a look so hateful despite your bleary vision. "No! Last time you did, it ended in a divorce for me! I refuse to let you turn me into a two-time divorcee!"

"I'm pretty sure your marriage is far from my business, I'm just your kind-hearted, handsome broker—"

"Bah! You— tasteless prick!"

You burped loudly afterwards and Gojo winced, and then you suddenly (and theatrically, he might add) slumped face-down onto the table with a thud, passed out in all your drunken glory.

And Gojo could only stare at you in somewhat disbelief.

. . .

He thought then, that you were definitely going to owe him one after this.

More often than not, throughout the past six months, Nanami also found himself thinking about you too.

Despite his calm exterior, separation with you didn't come easy for him. There was a reason he married you in the first place—he had loved you, and he too wanted it to last. You used to be the reason he went home on time each and everyday, the reason he eagerly anticipated spending his weekends with.

Everything had fallen apart before either of you realized it. Some disagreements suddenly spiraled into lonely nights, no updates during longer missions, your tears, and then ended with both of you filing the papers in the city hall to end it all.

Six months ago, he thought he was final with his decision. He thought it was the best as he was faced with the sight of your tear-streaked face.

“Kento, I’m not asking m-much, am I?” you asked between sobs, wiping your tears harshly. “Aren’t w-we family? Shouldn’t we be doing a lot of things—together?”

Recalling that moment now, it tugged at his heartstrings anew. Yet, despite everything...

“I’m telling you, I know my limits—”

“Is that all you have to say? Don’t you know how sick with worry I am?” you ended up shouting at him, voice quivering. “Put yourself in my shoes and think: how can I possibly sleep at night, constantly fearing that my husband might—” your voice broke, fresh tears flowing freely. “—might not come back?!”

He was the one who backed away first, who made you lose all hope, and ultimately, placed the sentence upon you.

“If you don't have it in you to... then, perhaps it's for the best that we... just get a divorce.”

"Nanami-san, you okay?"

He looked up from the sizzling barbeque grill pan to his junior, Ino Takuma, who looked concerned as he flipped the meat. "You have been staring into space for a while..."

"I'm fine, Ino-kun." He looked down and grabbed the tongs, flipping his side of beef.

Ino let out a sympathetic sigh. "Honestly, lately, you seem down."

Words he was holding back were "ever since your divorce", but Ino was pretty sure his senior understood the implicaton.

Nanami hummed. "Sometimes life just doesn't go as swimmingly... I'm fine."

Ino never really knew you that well and was curious. In fact, he was so very curious. When it comes to Nanami Kento, everything he does and has done is always with justified and sound reason, but he might be biased because the 7:3 sorcerer was his role model.

It might verge on invading his privacy, but—

"They said... Gojo-san was your matchmaker back then?" he went through with the question anyway, testing the waters. "I don't mean to pry, but I just thought it's cute."

To Ino's surprise, Nanami's lips curled into a small smile. "It's fine, Ino-kun. I think it has become common knowledge by now. Yeah... he was."

"For you to have fallen for someone who was Gojo's acquaintance... it speaks volumes about how charming Y/N is."

"Mmm," he nodded slightly as he indulged in the grilled meat. "She is."

"Nanami-san." Okay, Ino was starting to think that he wouldn't be getting his point across if he went the roundabout way. He would shoot it straight then. "I don't mean to patronize you... but if you're really that miserable, then I think you should go back to her and talk things out, no?"

Nanami put down his chopsticks and let out a soft sigh, making Ino to immediately regret his blatant suggestion.

"Before arriving at such a difficult decision, of course we did try to discuss some things," he explained, his gaze meeting his calmly. "I don't take matters like divorce lightly, Ino-kun."

"But still... now—"

To drove the point home, Nanami chose to vocalize the conclusion that still left a bitter taste in his mouth to this day:

"She is unhappy with the way things are, and I have to come to terms with the fact that I can't provide what she needs."

Ino's gaze fell in dejection. "Nanami-san..."

Nanami chuckled fondly. “I appreciate your concern, Ino-kun. Thank you.”

In front of his junior, he could maintain composure and narrated the collapse of his own marriage as if he were a mere spectator. But in his heart of hearts, Nanami Kento wasn’t at all the stoic man he made everyone believed he was—the fact that he had failed to give you the life of happiness he promised on the day he proposed to you still stung him to this day.

It hurt him, but echoing your words, he couldn't subject you to a marriage that felt like a dull cohabitation with little understanding.

“We never really talk anymore, do we...? We never really work on our problems too. Kento, lately, I feel like... things have changed.”

Suppose what he had to do was letting you go now.

It was easier said than done, because when Nanami saw you the next day at the school—this being the first time in several weeks—he almost couldn’t keep his cool.

"Ichiji, don't be too stiff!" you slapped the poor guy in the back with a giggle. "It's just me, it's been a while!"

You didn't look much different than the last he saw you—still the chirpy self he unwittingly fell in love with, staying on top of the latest fashion trends and all. Yet, there was definitely something different about you, something he just couldn't quite identify...

And then those cheerfulness deflated when your gaze met his, eyes widening as you tried to get your bearings. "Oh—h-hi, Kento."

That's too forced. It was so unnatural that made him almost wince.

"Hello." But the tremble in his voice, too, betrayed him. "Have you been well?"

You shifted your gaze away from him, and right before you answered, you let out a cough, and that was when he spotted it: you looked kind of pale.

"I'm fine."

"Oh, that's good then."

Silence. This was the absolute worst.

Nanami exhaled. It was you he was talking to, his ex-wife. He knew you inside out—or at least, he used to. He knew you didn't like this dryness as much as he did. He had to say something.

He braved himself. "Are you here for a mission?"

You looked at him in slight surprise. "Oh... yeah."

Darn it. Another dry reply.

"There... is a cursed totem in North Tokyo," you elaborated, not really looking at him. "Gojo's out from tomorrow until next week. I'm substituting for him to assist the first years."

"Are you sure you're up for that?" Nanami found himself asking before he could stop. "I mean no disrespect, but you look a bit pale."

"I am," you snapped, leaving him surprised. It was as though he had unintentionally struck a nerve, quickly turning your mood sour. "I'm fully capable of handling this, Kento."

"Please, I don't mean to upset you. I'm just..."

Worried about you. Somehow his throat closed in, it didn't really feel right to say that now.

"—I know how rash you can be." He regretted his words as soon as they were out.

It was clearly a bad choice of words as you took offense, your expression quickly turned into one of disdain.

"How rich... that it's coming from you," you scowled.

Memories of your failed marriage flooded your mind's eye. The long nights your ex-husband didn't bother to leave you a message. How he would return home with wounds and blood staining his clothes. And now... he had the nerve to insinuate that you were the reckless one?

"I can take care of myse—"

"That's a whole load of bullshit!"

Good grief. Why must Gojo pick this exact scene to show up?

The blindfold took big strides and halted between the two of you, pointing one finger in your face.

“Last night, she got wasted. Like totally wasted! She could barely walk straight afterwards and then she had the audacity to blame me! Me! For all her mess! Goodness, I’m just a very chivalrous friend and yet—”

"Shut up!" you were horrified, face flushed with embarrassment. "Gojo, you complete jerk!"

Nanami wouldn't admit it, but there was always something between you and Gojo Satoru that made him a bit uncomfortable, even way back when the two of you were still married. Perhaps the closeness, the candidness you shared. He knew you wouldn't harbor anything for someone as elusive as Gojo Satoru, but still, it remained an uncomfortable sight for him.

Like there was nothing pleasant about knowing Gojo Satoru was the one taking care of you in your drunken stupor. You shouldn't have in the first place. If it were him, he wouldn't let you hurt yourself. If he were still the one by your side—

Despite himself, thoughts like that swirled in his mind far often than he would've liked.

Suddenly, the air felt stifling. Nanami didn't like this at all, and even as you two were still harmlessly bickering, he chose to leave.

"Oiii, Nanami!"

He had barely left the room when the person he disliked the most emerged from the door, following closely behind him. Gojo evidently knew what his thoughts were. As irritating as he was, the bloke was smart, he wasn't the strongest for nothing.

"Na-na-mi! You can't just leave like that! We're going to have lunch together—"

"Gojo-san," Nanami stopped in his tracks and let out an exasperated sigh, throwing the white-haired idiot a glare so hard it would curse him if only glares could. "Please stop bothering me."

“How cold-hearted,” the blindfold replied in a mocking scoff. “No matter how, she was once your wife. How could you not care one bit?”

“We have gone on our separate ways, and if she is good with the way things are, then so am I.”

What a lie. He still couldn't help but to care. If you ever needed his help in whatever way even now, he would still move heavens for you.

“And that’s where you’re wrong, Nanami,” Gojo suddenly interjected in a less playful manner. “She is really missing you, you know.”

But you had your best friend by your side, didn't you? Someone perfect, without equal. Surely, you wouldn't need him anymore.

Gojo raised an eyebrow. "How are you so sure that she's good with the way things are?"

"What exactly is she not good with?"

"Everything? You never ask her."

This was getting irritating, and before Nanami really lost control over himself, he finally drew a line.

"Gojo-san, I'm tired of people assuming things about our current relationship," he said, leveling a piercing look at him. "We are both adults. We reached the decision to separate because we both know why. If this is your way of showing concern, then thank you—but I'd prefer if you didn't interfere any further. We're handling this just fine, and by all means, I think people should stop associating us anymore."

With that, he left. Even when he wanted to stay longer with you, even when, in his wildest dreams, he wanted to rebuild everything with you again—

He knew you were there, hearing all of this.

Gojo clicked his tongue, clearly annoyed. "Grr... You're so stubborn..."

. . .

There was a reason why you went to the school. Yaga's sudden request and of course, the chance to see Nanami again.

But when your conversation ended in a bitter note and he walked away, a part of you plunged into instant panic, compelling you to eavesdrop on his conversation with Gojo.

But as expected from you cool ex-husband, he was all rationale and logic.

By all means, I think people should stop associating us anymore.

Nanami would think so, wouldn't he? And he wouldn't be bothered either.

You shouldn't have expected more. This was no television drama in which the couple would get back together that easily. You were living in the harsh reality of jujutsu world, which basically, was the cause of your divorce in the first place.

At one point, you found it all to be exhausting, but upon reflection, it was more painful to acknowledge that he never truly fought to keep you by his side.

Tears welled up in your eyes unbidden, and you walked away quickly, brushing them away.

This is it. There is no use hoping anymore.

If you weren't on missions, then you'd likely be drinking. This had been the undeniable truth over the past few weeks.

Gojo found both you and Nanami to be irritating. The way both of you would evade each other was just plain stupid by this point, since it was clear to anyone with eyes that you were still not over each other.

"Nanami! Why don't you join us for dinner tonight!"

And since you were such an irritable drunk, he chose to keep poking the easier target.

Nanami shot him a scathing look, definitely done. "I have a prior appointment. Goodbye."

"Hoh?! But! They'll have free drinks!"

For the life of him, Nanami just wanted to go back home. He had minus interest in free drinks and even less in Gojo himself, and he would make his points clear.

"For the last time, I'm telling you, I don't want any part in your—"

Ring! Ring! Ring!

"Ooh, wait a minute, Nanamin! I got a call!"

Nanami gritted his teeth in pure annoyance. He truly didn't care about his call and seized the chance to walk away quickly, eager to flee.

Until—

"Hello? Yes. Yes... what? Huh— Y/N is rushed to hospital?"

...and that caused him to halt abruptly. Suddenly, his entire body went rigid, as if he had been doused with a bucket of cold water.

You're hurt?

"I mean why—the hell? Severe bleeding?!" Gojo's voice dramatically rose, seemingly in surprise. "Whoa, uh, traffic accident?!"

Within seconds, everything as he knew it came to an end. He spun around, yanking the phone from Gojo's grasp, indifferent to whether it caught the latter off guard or not.

"Which hospital is this?" he demanded from the person on the other end, his voice rough and harsh. Suddenly, the fog in his mind dissipated, and he was consumed by panic.

"I'm sorry, sir, that's not—oh, it's Tokyo General Hospital—"

"Thank you." Nanami shoved the phone back to Gojo and broke into a sprint, in search of taxi.

At this moment, everything was a plethora of chaos—his surroundings melded into a blur, the constant honking of nearby vehicles echoed in his ears, and the relentless pounding in his chest threatened to overwhelm him. Nothing else held any significance. Nothing, except you.

Why did you get hurt? How did you even get into a traffic accident?

This was maddening. His world was falling apart hard and fast. The beginnings of heartbreak, stirring and churning in the depths of his stomach, once again threatened to drown him whole—

To others it may seem laughable that he was this shaken over an ex-wife, but precisely because you were his ex-wife was why he was running through the streets of Shibuya, opting not to take the cab as the traffic jam was at its peak.

Oh, how Nanami regretted it. He regretted a multitude of things; those long nights, silent treatments, your tears, divorcing you. If he could turn back the time, he'd do anything in his power to prevent that divorce from ever happening. He'd treasure you better, he'd make time for you more—

Because what if, now you were really slipping away from him for good? What if, he would never see you ever again?

Within minutes, he arrived at the said hospital, haggard, spooking the nurses, demanding your room number.

Thank heavens that the visiting hour wasn't over yet. He marched towards the said room, all of his logic and rationale flying out of window as he threw open the door.

And then he saw the pristine bed, IV drip, and you—

Sitting upright on the bed, turning a page of a magazine, your eyes widening and blinking at him in complete confusion—

Huh, what?

The last thing you would expect after waking up in the hospital was your ex-husband barging in unannounced, looking as though he'd just survived a whirlwind.

"Kento...?" you almost squeaked, taken aback at the sight.

His hair was a sweaty mess, his usually immaculate suit was crinkled and his tie was loosened, but it was the look in his eyes that grabbed your attention—as if expecting the worst.

“Are you alright?” he grounded out, approaching you in deliberately slow steps. “How long has it since you woke up?”

“Um... yes? Since about an hour or so.” You frowned. “Kento, what are you doing here?”

“They said you have severe bleeding, involved in an accident—”

“What! No! Did the hospital reach out to you?” you felt a bit uncomfortable at the thought. “I was sure I have removed you from my emergency contacts—”

“Gojo did—”

Suddenly, understanding dawned on him, and he cursed under his breath. “That rotten bastard!”

You blinked, unsure of what he meant at all. To his credit, Nanami didn’t dwell long on his thoughts and faced you once again with another fresh batch of confusion. “Wait, Gojo is your emergency contact? Why?”

“Should anything happen to me and a payment is required to settle it, he can handle the bills first?”

If Nanami didn’t look exasperated before then he sure did now. “Y/N… you…”

He released the deepest sigh imaginable before settling onto the sofa, further tousling his hair and removing his glasses to rub the bridge of his nose.

“Did you know I ran to get here because I thought something bad happened to you?” Nanami stated in a strained voice.

Why did your heart skip a beat? Why was Nanami suddenly playing the part of a concerned husband when the time for it has long passed?

Feeling suddenly irritated, you rolled your eyes. “I just passed out due to high blood pressure. It’s not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal?” his eyes squared on you, quiet anger behind them. “In what sense does you passing out ever ‘not a big deal’? What have you been doing?”

"Why does that even matter to you still?" you contested. "You were the one who said everyone should stop linking us together by now."

"Y/N, you're missing the—"

"You divorced me!" you screamed, tears threatening to spill from your eyes as the urge to cry threatened to consume you. "You... h-have divorced me, Nanami Kento!"

Nanami felt as if a blade had pierced and twisted his chest at the sight of you—your quivering form, the stifled sobs. He had never wished to see you in such despair again.

"So why!" you finally broke down and sobbed. "Why did you play the caring husband now? Why not before? Why do you keep toying with my feelings...?"

"I'm not." Nanami grunted, getting up and approaching your bed. "I never meant to. That was never my intention. I never—"

"Then what!? What are you doing? Why did you throw me out just like that and why now—"

"Believe me when I said that I never want you to be miserable!"

You halted mid-rant, eyes wide as you gazed at him. Blinking, you felt a tear roll down your cheek. It was the first time Nanami had ever raised his voice at you. Even in the past, he never had.

But suddenly, a sharp pain pierced through your abdomen, causing you to instinctively clutch it. You whimpered, a nearly involuntary squeak escaping you, feeling the intense burn inside.

Nanami immediately got a hold of your hunched form, alarmed. "What is it? What hurts?" When all you could manage were pained sniffles in response, he swiftly hit the nurses' button and enveloped you in his embrace.

"Hold on," he comforted, placing a hand over where you clutched your abdomen, trying to offer some relief in any way. "They'll be here soon, don't pass out!"

"Mmngh," you gripped his hand in response, squeezing it as you slumped into his chest. For the first time in six months, you were enveloped in his warmth once again, and despite everything that had transpired, you were deeply moved by his gesture.

It took seeing you in such distress to dispel any doubts Nanami may have had. You were so petite against him, so delicate as you squirmed amidst your tears.

Had you experienced pain like this in the past six months? The thought made his heart lurch. Did no one comfort you at all?

. . .

And that was when he decided it.

He never, ever wants to see you in any sort of pain, ever again. And should it happen, then he'll be the one staying by your side, just like this.

Alcoholic gastritis. You consumed so much alcohol that it irritated your ulcer and causes a really painful tummy ache.

You could feel Nanami's judging gaze on you as your attending doctor explained your predicament. Truth to be told, you were quite ashamed. Your unhealthy lifestyle were laid bare before your ex-husband and it made you feel like a kid being scolded for misbehaving.

After the doctor left, Nanami sighed and pulled out a chair next to your bed. "Are you feeling better now?"

"Yeah..." you mumbled, avoiding his eyes. "Sorry, that... you have to see that."

But thankfully, he was unflappable as ever. "Nothing to be sorry about. It's fine."

You were kind of embarrassed of your outburst earlier too. While you didn't regret expressing your feelings, you pondered if could've done it in a less confrontational way.

At this point, you'd accept anything. Even if Nanami told you off after this—

"Let me continue from what I was saying earlier," he suddenly began, catching your attention. You perked up, and looked at him expectantly.

Nanami released a deep sigh, and the words he spoke next were ones you never thought you'd hear from him again.

"Did you remember what I said when I proposed our divorce?" he asked, somewhat rhetorically. You wordlessly nodded, because it was one of the lines that made you unable to hate him completely.

"I said, you don't deserve to be unhappy." Nanami looked you right in the eyes, undaunted. "And that still stands until now."

Now fully engrossed in his words, the rhythm of your heart intensified, echoing in your chest.

"It wasn't a decision I blurted out lightly. I know you're hurt, because I am too. I married you with a reason. I have loved you. and if you were to ask me now, my answer would be the same—I am still in love with you."

Why did it feel like your vision was beginning to blur once more?

"But," Nanami's face contorted into a frown, gazing hard at you. "If staying with me is what makes you miserable—if waiting nights after nights, hoping I can make it each time haunts you so much—then I'm more than willing to release you from that burden. I don't want to subject you to that life."

Warm tears slid down your cheeks. Sniffling, you averted your gaze, looking downwards.

"Look, I make you cry again," he sighed, a mix of fondness and sadness in his voice, as a bitter smile graced his lips. One of his thumbs gently lifted your jaw, while the other tenderly wiped away your tears.

"Kento, I—" you quickly looked up, swallowing the lump in your throat. You had made up your mind. "I don't want you to leav—"

"I know," he cut in, his voice solemn, as he stroked your tear-streaked cheeks. "I know, and that's exactly why I'm going to say what I'm about to say next."

And with his next words, your heart burst into complete, utter warmth—

"Let's start over." Nanami Kento's voice was your lifeline, anchoring you and keeping you afloat. "We can take our time. There's no rush—we can return to how things were in the beginning. And when you're ready, then and only then... will I ask you to marry me again."

The one person who has your heart in his grasp, someone whom you are willing to care way more than yourself... You were openly sobbing now and yet a radiant smile broke through your tears.

There was only one answer you had in mind.

Five years later

"Yes! Yes! Yay!"

Today was sunny, just like the day of your wedding. Memories flooded back as you glanced at the grand wedding portrait in the foyer, a snapshot of yourself and your husband in blissful celebration.

A smile tugged at your lips as you stared at the gentle smile on Kento's face amidst his typically stiff posture. You remembered his vows to you.

The one person who I will look for the rest of my life... is you. I have never met someone so important and precious to me that it hurts.

The sound of a car pulling up snapped you out of your reverie. Oh, he's home.

As you opened the door, your smile grew even broader, until a small figure darted past you at such speed that you were left gawking.

"Daddy!" your daughter's voice rang out with pure delight, leaping into your husband's arms the moment he swung the car door open, catching him off guard.

"Oh my, why are you so sweaty?" Kento inquired, scrutinizing your daughter with a puzzled frown, yet holding her close. "I thought we're going to the playground after this?"

"She's so excited for it that she keeps running and jumping around all the while," you chimed in with a gentle sigh, affectionately ruffling your daughter's hair as she beamed up at both of you.

Before long, the three of you set off to the playground, fulfilling the promise you had made to your daughter. As she entertained herself with the slides, Kento's low chuckle drew your attention. "What's so funny?"

"She takes after you a lot, you know," he remarked, a fond smile on his face. "The way she is just full of energy."

"Really? But sometimes she'll get this wrinkly little scowl on her face when she's annoyed—she looks like you then."

"Wrinkly...? No, surely I don't have that many wrinkles yet..."

Your laughter filled the air, a testament to the joy found in these simple, everyday moments.

Unexpected moments of joy, the comfort of family, and a love that had grown and evolved, stronger and more resilient with time...

And this, is what you'd call a happy marriage.

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[il-miele-che-scrive]

Go for his brother part 3

Part 2

Part 1

charles_leclerc The day @/y/n_leclerc and I decided to spent the forever together

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y/n_leclerc Did I mention I'm in love with you? 😭

↳charles_leclerc Yeah I think you mentioned that a few times in the vows, ma chérie

y/n_leclerc I love it when you call me french terms of endearment oh my god 😩

username1 SHE'S HOOKED

↳username2 FOR LIFE 🤞

pierregasly And I really thought I wouldn't see that day

↳y/n_leclerc Life's full of surprises isn't it?

username3 Charles calls her ma chérie, Arthur used to call her mon bébé 😭 do you get deja vu

↳username4 y/n: *breathes* y'all: do you get deja vu omg she used to breathe with Arthur 😭

↳username5 You remember mon bébé but do you remember chouchou? 😭

username3 OMG YES he used to call her chouchou and she used to call him Thurthur 😭

username4 GET. OVER. THEM. Y/n is now married to Charles BESIDES Arthur CHEATED on her. She deserved better than Arthur and now she has it.

pascale_leclerc Congratulations my loves ❤️😘 the wedding was beautiful

↳y/n_leclerc Merci maman🫶

↳username3 Pascale is just happy to have Y/n in her family and I live for this

username2 Maybe it was all Pascale's idea, when she found out Arthur cheated, she told Charles to keep Y/n in the family lmao

username3 And he stayed committed to the job💪

danielricciardo The instant photos part was awesome, I bet it was Y/n's idea

↳y/n_leclerc Yes it was 🫡and it was really nice to see you, Max, Lando and Carlos having lots of fun with it once the alcohol kicked in

charles_leclerc Not to mention now we have some things to blackmail you with

danielricciardo Bold of you to assume I'd be ashamed of any of these, Charles

carlossainz55 Looking forward to seeing Y/n in the paddock more often! 😊

↳y/n_leclerc You know, Carlos, some people have jobs... You should look it up sometime...🫶

↳username5 Is she now gonna go for Carlos lmao

scuderiaferrari Big day for our favorite couple ❤️ evviva gli sposi 👏

↳charles_leclerc Grazie mille❤️❤️

↳y/n_leclerc We're the favorite couple 🥹

georgerussell63 Even though you were engaged I didn't believe you'd actually do it until it happened

↳charles_leclerc Thanks George, supportive as always

username1 That's what I call KARMA

username2 But when are we going to talk about the argument Arthur and Charles had before the wedding?

↳username3 What were you in their house? Lmao

username2 Another gossip page said that Arthur and Charles argued in front of the wedding chapel

username3 That's so unrealistic, don't trust everything you see on these pages

username4 Hey so do we know if there were any arguments?

↳f1gossip There's no way we'd have any information on that, it was a very private ceremony. That is highly doubtful though, I don't think this could've happened. Even Arthur knows better than acting like this on his brother's wedding day.

username3 That's so right, Arthur isn't dumb enough to act like a dick on his brother's wedding day, he knows it's his own fault

username5 Yeah it would be so weird if Arthur was playing angry now like man it's all consequences of your own actions, be an adult

username6 Even if it wasn't showing, Arthur was definitely dying on the inside. Imagine seeing your ex girlfriend at the altar next to your brother. You're thinking "it should be me with her", but it's too late

↳username7 One day Y/n and Charles will have kids, they'll be a happy family. Charles will have everything Arthur could want - a seat in F1, Y/n as his wife, little Leclerc(s) running around. Arthur will always be the "less successful" Leclerc. No wonder Lorenzo stays out of the spotlight

username8 Now you're making it sound depressing lol

username7 Tbh I cried a little thinking about this even though I know that's what Arthur deserves for cheating on Y/n

username9 I wonder what happened between Arthur and [ex best friend's name]

↳f1gossip She allegedly broke up with him and a few days later was seen on a date with a fellow Formula 2 driver.

username7 This keeps getting better

username9 WHO???? I NEED TO KNOW???

username8 I saw someone say she was seen with that Piñacolada guy

username9 Piñacolada?? Do you mean Franco Colapinto?? 💀

y/n_leclerc Charles isn't my fiancé anymore 👰‍♀️🤵

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charles_leclerc I told you it's not the best way to say it

↳y/n_leclerc You can't stop me, tesoro

username1 OMG I've just noticed Y/n changed her username

↳username2 well, she got married...

lilymhe Wedding of the century

francisca.cgomes Every little girl dreams of a perfect wedding. That was this wedding

↳exbestfriend I've never dreamt of a wedding as a kid

francisca.cgomes Girl nobody asked

exbestfriend Why would a kid think about it? Don't they have better things to do? Like playing with toys and BEING A KID?

y/n_leclerc Pls not under my wedding post, get your jealous ass outta here

yoursister I'm so proud of you Y/n 😭

↳y/n_leclerc I know, you couldn't stop crying 😭

yoursister You know it were happy tears, I love you so much 😭

username3 LMAO [ex best friend's name]'s comments are pure comedy 💀 do you think she'll try to steal Charles now?

↳username4 Doesn't matter, Charles will never cheat on Y/n

arthur_leclerc You looked amazing

↳username2 Get the fuck out of this comment section

↳username3 All you can do about it now is cry, you wasted your chance

↳username4 The way Y/n doesn't even bother to reply

alex_albon I bet you wouldn't have the guts to wear the dress to the paddock next race

↳y/n_leclerc You're right, I won't 🙌 it's too beautiful to take any risks

charlottesiine Dream dress 🤍

↳y/n_leclerc I know right 🥹 when I saw it I knew right away THAT'S THE ONE

↳username5 wtf what's Cha doing here

username6 They follow each other since that one time they hung out together

username5 ahh the famous "we both suffered a Leclerc" thing

username7 GUYS I AM CRYING Cha said dream dress, I wonder if she's thinking it should be hers, like she should be in Y/n's place 🥹😭

↳username8 Y'all need to stop, first talking about Arthur, now about Charlotte. Go touch some grass

username7 but, unlike Y/nArthur, ChaCha broke up on good terms, so this could be her

username8 But it's not. Grow up. So disrespectful to talk about it on a wedding post

username9 I am really happy for Y/n and Charles. But I can't stop thinking this could be Y/n and Arthur. Or Charles and Charlotte

↳username7 I bet Arthur also can't stop thinking about this lmao he'll never find someone who'll love him as much as Y/n did

username9 Let's not go that far maybe...?

username1 Their voices are so similar 😭 do you think Y/n sometimes accidentally calls Charles Arthur?

↳username2 Do you think she sometimes says the wrong name in bed? 💀

username3 This whole story, from the moment Arthur cheated to the end of this interview, is my Roman Empire

username4 I love that they stay on good terms even after what happened with Y/n

↳username1 In this exact interview Arthur said he didn't talk to Charles for WEEKS, he didn't even show up on the family dinners, until one day he understood he can only blame himself

username5 You can see that Arthur is happy for his big brother, but in his voice you can hear the pain 😭

username6 When Arthur said "Now I see what I did was hurtful and I'm glad it was Charles who took care of Y/n after it happened, instead of some random guy who would possibly repeat my mistake" it broke me 😭

↳username7 "Y/n is an amazing woman and I hope Charles will give her everything I couldn't." 😭😭

username8 when Ch asked "do you think you'd deserve a second chance? if Y/n and I weren't married, of course" as a joke and A replied "honestly? no, I was a douchebag and the cheating wasn't the only issue in our relationship, she truly deserved better" AND THEN GAVE HIS BROTHER A BIG SMILE WTF?? 😭😭

username9 At least he realizes his mistakes😭

username4 Not only cheating?? What else?? I need to know immediately

username8 They didn't say it in the video, I doubt they would ever say it publicly unless Y/n decides to speak about it (but I don't see why would she, being happily married now)

username10 They should release one interview of the Leclercs just talking about this whole Y/n situation

y/n_leclerc Maybe it all happened a bit quick, but my husband is a race driver for a reason

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lilymhe I GASPED when I saw the caption

↳charles_leclerc I asked her nicely to look for some basic quote 🙁

pascale_leclerc Can't wait to meet our little Leclerc❤️

↳y/n_leclerc You'll be the first one to find out❤️

yoursister That's how I find out? Through a post?😭

↳y/n_leclerc I wanted to surprise you 🥹

yoursister I'm kidding, I'm happy for you guys 🩷

francisca.cgomes Someone check on Arthur

↳y/n_leclerc KIKA!!!!

↳username1 I love Kika 😭

↳username2 Jokes aside someone really needs to check up on him

arthur_leclerc It really suits you 🩷

↳y/n_leclerc Don't say that to Charles, he already told me he'd like 2 more 😭 I don't think I wanna go further than just this one

charles_leclerc I'm not gonna force you! If you wanna stop at one, that's fine by me

y/n_leclerc We can get a puppy instead? Right now it would be perfect so the puppy and the baby can entertain each other and grow up together

charles_leclerc Alright, ma chérie, we can talk about that 😂

↳username1 "I hope Charles gives her everything I couldn't" 😭 so that's what he meant

↳username2 Alexa play the one that got away by Katy Perry

username3 I just know Arthur will be the fun uncle omg

↳username4 I don't think he'll spend much time with the baby, if I were him it would always make me think "wow, that baby could be mine if I didn't mess up" 💀

username3 It seems like he understood his mistake and came to terms with the consequences. Plus, he didn't say it, but I feel like in the video shared by the gossip page he implied not wanting kids

username4 What do you mean? How?

username3 "I hope Charles gives her everything I couldn't" and then said the cheating wasn't the only reason for the breakup and now, a few weeks pass and we get the pregnancy announcement

username4 Well, maybe getting cheated on didn't work out so badly for Y/n in the end

alex_albon Project Verstappen? 😏

↳georgerussell63 *project Hamilton

charles_leclerc *project Leclerc 😌

alex_albon Better start saving up for the baby's therapy then

charles_leclerc Welcome home, Jules Hervé Leclerc, born July 17 🤍

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