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thedragonnerd · 3 years

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Fic: Love Languages

Headcanon suggested by a lovely anon, which spawned into a fic. Read on Ao3 or under the cut.

Words of affirmation

Receiving compliments or words of encouragement are not uncommon for Namaari. She has gone through life aiming to be the best at everything she does – the best leader, the best warrior, the best Princess – and along with her success come compliments on her fighting techniques, her decision-making skills, and even her ability to look formidable in her formal attire.

As royalty, people lavish her with praises when they see an opportunity to get into her good graces, despite the obvious lack of sincerity behind their words, and it tires her to deal with fawning citizens. She loves her people, but she’d rather they’d love her back truly; false words mean nothing.

Chief Virana does not give out compliments easily, and is often faster to critique than to encourage. Namaari pretends her mother’s approval is nothing more than something important to receive from her Chief, but in reality, she craves hearing soft words such as ‘well done, Morning Mist’, whenever she is lucky enough to have them bestowed upon her.

As she grows up, she decides that sweet words are nice to have, but ultimately unnecessary – nothing more than a nod of acknowledgement is needed, before one can place it aside and move on to more important things. And then Raya comes back into her life.

Raya, who can flirt endlessly with elaborate innuendos until Namaari rolls her eyes at her ridiculousness. Raya, who is quite happy to press herself closer than absolutely necessary in their sparring sessions, just to set out some unspoken physical challenge.

And yet, when it comes to providing a genuine compliment, Raya practically freezes.

‘I like…like your hair,’ she mumbles one day to Namaari, glancing off to the side in order to avoid making eye contact. Her cheeks are flushed bright red, even though earlier in the day she had made a lewd comment about a sword which didn’t even have her blinking.

For some reason, Raya’s lack of suaveness when it comes to providing true compliments delights Namaari, and she hoards each instance close to her heart, happy in the knowledge that every word spoken was genuine in its meaning.

In return, she starts to gift Raya with compliments of her own.

For Raya is not used to receiving compliments, at least not in a long time. Her Ba used to provide encouragement and compliments often, but that was many years ago, and now he hesitates to put them into words sometimes, unsure of how this new dynamic works when he’s looking at a grown-up daughter rather than a small child.

Namaari has no difficulty in sharing them though.

‘You look very beautiful today,’ she tells Raya softly one evening, when they are having dinner. Raya stammers out some incomprehensible response, and spends the rest of the meal staring down at her bowl, occasionally darting her eyes over to Namaari.

‘I love that hairstyle on you,’ Namaari says to her a few days later, watching as Raya braids her hair back with expert precision.

‘Umm…thanks?’ Raya squeaks.

‘Your techniques were excellent today,’ Namaari informs her after a sparring session. This time, Raya just nods, and clears her throat before trying to awkwardly change the subject. Namaari can still see the smile on her lips though.

Eventually, Raya becomes better at both giving and receiving words of affirmation. Namaari learns how true compliments can be more meaningful than expected.

It isn’t the most important aspect of their relationship, but they like to encourage each other all the same.

Acts of service

Raya sees how much of a burden Namaari perpetually takes onto her shoulders, in her duties for Fang. She is so focused on helping her people rebuild and expand, or going away on diplomatic missions to help form better relations with the other lands, that she forgets to take a moment to breath sometimes.

Raya wants to take some of her stress away, by helping her carry out some of her duties or at least be involved in organizing certain aspects of the expansion projects, but she discovers quickly that Namaari is somewhat of a perfectionist. It is almost more stressful for her to find herself out of the loop or uninformed about decisions, than it would be to allow her undertake the duties in the first place, and so Raya finds it more helpful to just back off from the work unless asked to provide support.

It’s also a way for Namaari to feel as if she is atoning for her past actions. Raya wishes she wouldn’t feel the need to do so, but it is something they’ve argued about before, and they always end up stuck in a perpetual loop.

One of the ways Raya can help however, is with her cooking.

Namaari is an awful cook (something Raya unfortunately discovers herself with one ill-fated meal), but she is fascinated by watching Raya conjure something up in the kitchen.

Gone are the days of living off jackfruit jerky; with so many fresh and interesting ingredients at her disposal, and with the occasional reminders from Ba when she is unsure about something, Raya makes a whole array of different foods over the months.

It’s one of the best ways of getting Namaari to relax, Raya finds. Every mealtime when Raya is behind the pot, Namaari will abandon whatever work she is doing, and will sit and watch Raya finish making the dishes. They’ll always eat it together, and for a short while, Raya can feel the stress lift free from Namaari as she laughs over Raya’s words and enjoys good food.

Gifts

The first gift Namaari ever gave Raya has almost become a symbol for their entire complicated history. It represents new friendship, betrayal, and after so many years…forgiveness and a fresh start.

Namaari gives it back to her not long after the return of Kumandra, before she can second-guess herself.

‘It was a gift,’ she says, half-expecting it to be thrown back in her face. But Raya runs her finger gently over the surface of the dragon pendant, and then sends her a small smile. The next day, Namaari sees it hanging around her neck once more.

Once they start dating properly, Namaari can’t get it out of her mind how much the gift seemed to mean to Raya, both times.

‘She still doesn’t have that many personal belongings,’ Namaari informs Sisu, as an explanation as to why she was forcing the dragon to accompany her around endless market stalls in Talon, looking for the perfect gift for Raya. ‘I figure it’s because she was on the move so much in life, she couldn’t carry a lot.’

Sisu makes an ‘mmm’ sound, clearly not buying her reasoning completely, but allows the topic to drop when she’s distracted by shiny objects at the next stall.

Namaari finds a small knife that can be strapped to a wrist and slipped up the sleeve. She knows how much Raya prefers to be carrying at least one weapon with her at all times, and this would be perfect for diplomatic meetings – subtle, and easy to hide. And indeed, Raya wears it continuously after receiving it as a gift.

On another visit to another market, this time in Spine, Namaari spies a comb with a beautifully carved handle.

‘For your hair,’ she says in an attempt to be casual, thrusting it awkwardly in Raya’s direction that evening. Raya loves it, and it is indeed used every night before bed to comb out her braids.

Every time Namaari has to travel on diplomatic missions, she now ensures that she brings back something small for Raya.

‘I love the gifts,’ Raya tells her one day. ‘But I love even more how it shows you’re thinking of me when you’re away.’

One evening, as they are getting ready for bed, a small golden ring drops out of Namaari’s pocket by mistake.

‘Is…is that my old hair band?’ Raya asks, peering over the side of the bed as Namaari scoops it up in a hurry. ‘I thought I’d lost that years ago.’

‘I found it,’ Namaari says defensively, clutching it tight in her fist. ‘I guess…I never asked you if you wanted it back?’

Raya shakes her head with a smile, but the following evening, she steps up behind Namaari, sliding her hand into her pocket. Namaari watches as she pulls out the hair band and threads it onto a small gold chain.

From then on, they both wear a gift from the other around their necks.

Physical touch

Sometimes, everything can become overwhelming, the past traumas so great that it seems suffocating. And in that darkness, sometimes the gentle touch of another is the only thing keeping the world grounded.

Raya goes six long years without receiving a hug. At the time, she doesn’t see it as a big deal – she’s grown up fast, and learnt that the world isn’t the welcoming place her father once hoped it could be. Even moreso, her Ba was the last one to hug her, and she doesn’t mind keeping it that way.

Now though, she finds comfort in the small touches. It’s in the featherlight way Namaari’s nose brushes against her neck as they curl up together in bed, waiting for the morning sun to rise. It’s in the gentle trail of Namaari’s fingers across her back, as they stand talking to others, and Namaari absentmindedly reaches out for her. It’s in the soft kiss against her temple, when Namaari has to go back to work after lunch.

Occasionally, she will need to be encompassed by that comfort, and in this moment, she will go and find Namaari, stepping closer until her forehead rests on her shoulder. No matter what she was previously doing, Namaari will pause everything, wrapping her arms tightly around Raya, and they stand there until Raya can feel as if she can breathe again.

Namaari has a habit of falling too far into her own mind sometimes. She is an outwardly composed and pragmatic individual, but internally, all sorts of doubts and guilt still plague her, and there are days where she can’t shake off the feeling that she isn’t doing enough in her life to atone for her past, or that she is a fraud who has no right in stepping up and trying to lead her people when her previous actions cost them so much.

It’s difficult for her to ask for help in these moments. Raya learns instead to notice the signs of a bad day, or whenever Namaari gets trapped into a downwards spiral, and she will take Namaari by the hands and sit them somewhere quiet.

There they can actually talk, and sometimes Namaari feels comfortable enough to share her fears. But the most important thing, Raya finds, is to slide an arm around her shoulders, pulling her in tight and peppering her cheek and bare shoulder with small kisses.

Raya refuses to let her go until she sees at least one small smile.

Quality time

In the early days of the relationship, there is still so much separation between the two of them. Raya is in Heart, helping her Ba welcome back everyone to their lands, fixing up the buildings, ensuring the harvest gets started…There are so many jobs to do, and Raya knows Namaari is undergoing the same issues back in Fang, coupled with an expansion of their kingdom.

On top of all of this, there are endless council meetings and diplomatic missions, so if it isn’t Namaari being busy with politics, it is Raya, much to her annoyance.

Whenever they do get to spend time together, they ensure no minute is wasted. They have meals together, and spar together, and find all sorts of random ways to entertain themselves. Namaari loves to go out in the evenings and watch the night sky, attempting to teach the constellations to Raya; but Raya decides that these constellations are ridiculous, and so they create their own. Raya meanwhile loves to go for hikes in the woods, dragging Namaari along to discover new plants and wildlife, and occasionally climbing the trees.

They both love to sit in bed next to each other, quietly reading their books, or discussing their day. Sometimes, Raya will lie sideways on the bed, her stomach across Namaari’s legs and her arms hanging over the edge, so she can carve pieces of wood into intricate shapes, with Namaari reads out loud for the both of them.

Even after several years, and living together permanently, Raya finds herself reflecting on the fact that she never gets bored as long as she’s with Namaari.

They are currently lying in a field somewhere in the depths of Heart land, enjoying the sun shining onto their faces and the grass tickling their skin. She lazily wiggles her hand until it makes contact with Namaari.

‘Dep la?’ Raya whispers, and Namaari grunts in response. ‘You don’t get bored with me, right?’

Namaari merely shuffles closer without even opening an eye, resting her cheek against Raya’s shoulder.

‘Don’t be stupid,’ she mumbles, and she’s curled up so close that Raya can feel the vibrations of her voice on her skin.

‘Didn’t think so,’ Raya says in satisfaction. They continue to enjoy the peace.

#rayaari #raya and the last dragon #raya and namaari #ratld #raya #namaari #rayaari fic #rayamaari #this was supposed to be a headcanon #but it all was just like 'hello must get out of the brain'#some fluff to keep you guys happy #while i work on the concept au angst

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triggerhappyimagines · 3 years

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How about the V3 boys, (the ones who died) with a s/o whos the Ultimate Spirit Medium/Necromancer and they call the spirit of the dead character? I just wanna see some scenarios/hc's of that, if u could do it that'd be gr8! If not thats okay, i understand ^^

hey everyone, long time no see! sorry for sort of vanishing for a while, i’ve been super busy with school and my job and kind of lost interest in danganronpa for a little bit,,,, but i’m back and i’m gonna try my best to get through the requests in our inbox and maybe even try and finish a few more of the october prompts (if you guys would still be interested in seeing those!!).

anyways, sorry for the long wait on your request, anon! this was one i had started a few months ago back when i was writing regularly and i finally buckled down and finished it!! i decided to do all the v3 boys (except kiibo because uhhh hes a robot) instead of just the ones who died in canon to avoid spoilers for anyone who hasn’t finished the game yet!! i apologize if some of these seem repetitive i sorta started running out of ideas by the end lmao. i hope you enjoy, anon!

warnings: mentions of death/dying (obviously), general angst

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ:

Shuichi Saihara

— to say the least, Shuichi is a little shaken up now that he’s gone and you’re... well, not.

— he always told you he’d stay by your side forever, and he feels guilty. he feels like he broke a promise

— but... you talk to him again that first night. you say his name and look straight at him. can you see him? no, it couldn’t be... right?

— of course, once he puts all the pieces together, it all makes sense

— you’re the ultimate spirit medium, for goodness sakes! of course you can see him and speak to him the same way you would any other living person

— after a while, Shuichi stops feeling so guilty for leaving you. partially because it doesn’t feel quite like he’s abandoned you, and also because you reassure him that he didn’t do anything wrong by dying

— i mean, come on, it’s not his fault he got killed! how could you ever hold that against him?

— still, it takes him some time to come to terms with everything.

— though he loves you, he still finds it sad that he can never speak to anyone else ever again. at least, not without your aid.

— but as long as he has you by his side to help him cope... he knows he’ll be alright

— after all, he loves you, and you love him. and that’s enough to give him the strength he needs to keep from falling apart.

Rantaro Amami

— he's still very protective of you, despite the fact he’s merely a spirit now

— he’s always right by your side, no matter what.

— even when you aren’t able to take a moment to talk to him, or even look in his direction, Rantaro is right there

— if he were still alive, the way he now follows you around all the time may seem obsessive and creepy, but you actually appreciate it

— nobody else can see or speak to him but you, which makes his constant presence comforting, in a way

— Rantaro isn’t able to touch you in the same way he could when he was alive, but nonetheless, he still tries

— he’ll try to place his hand atop yours, or wrap his arms around your figure, but he always just passes straight through you

— you find the chill that blossoms on your skin where he touched you comforting; it’s a reminder that even though he’s gone, he’s still there with you

— it breaks his heart that he can’t truly be with you, but he tries not to focus on his own problems too much

— after all, your happiness is much more important to him than his own; you are his priority

— you’ll have to remind him that it’s okay for him to be sad, and that he shouldn’t bottle up his own emotions to be there for you

— he’ll want to keep being the person to take care of you, and watch out for you, but he needs you to be that person for him

Kokichi Ouma

— you didn’t really think Kokichi would start behaving himself just because he’s dead, did you?

— honestly he uses the fact only you can see and speak to him to his advantage

— good luck trying to keep your cool around other people while he’s off being a clown right in front of you

— but of course, he’s not all fun and games

— i mean... he’s dead. and that sucks

— he probably won’t show it, at least not right away, but he doesn’t like the feeling of separation between you two

— sure, he’s still around, but not like before. before, he could surprise you with a kiss or a suffocating hug, but he just can’t do that anymore

— it hurts. really bad.

— but he knows he’ll be okay. he know’s he’ll get used to it someday, as long as he has you with him to cheer him up when he gets especially sad

— you’re his sunshine, and he may not show it, but he needs you. so don’t leave him all alone, okay?

Gonta Gokuhara

— lets be honest... Gonta has the hardest time of the bunch adjusting to being nothing more than a spirit

— you’ll likely have to give him a lot of comfort. he’s confused, and he misses being able to be with you for real :(

— the hardest part for him is no longer being able to touch you

— he longs to feel your lips press gently against his cheek, to lay in your lap as your hands comb through his hair... he’d give anything to hold you in his arms again...

— unlike Rantaro, he’s not content with merely passing through your body when he makes contact with you

— it just... upsets him. it’s a cruel reminder that his life ended, and that he will never get to hold you, kiss you, and just love you the way he could before his life ended

— be patient with him, please... he’ll adapt eventually... but it could take a while

— just make sure to remind him how much you love him, he’ll need a lot of reassurance and comfort from you

Kaito Momota

— surprisingly, Kaito adapts to the situation pretty well

— if he is struggling with any sort of major emotions, he’s doing a stellar job of hiding it from you. and you hate that

— you don’t totally believe him when he says he’s okay, or when he tells you not to worry about him

— you know him better than that. it doesn’t make sense to you. he just died for crying out loud! he can never follow his dreams, never have the future he always wanted with you

— and you don’t understand how he can just shrug all that off and continue being your boyfriend like normal

— you confront him about it one night. he’s laying on his back, hovering beside you as you read (Kaito loves being able to float around in midair. perks of being a ghost, right?)

— "how can you be okay?" you blurt out suddenly. he looks at you, confused.

— you continue, asking all the questions that had been gnawing at you for days, and when you finally finish, he just laughs

— "of course i’m upset. but it’s a man’s job to protect the ones he loves! and being there for you is much more important than staying upset about this." he explains

— you can’t help but feel a little stupid. he’d always put you first, always prioritized your needs over anyone else’s, even his own. and he wasn’t about to stop just because he died

— fortunately for you, he isn’t upset with you sort of asking him why the hell he wasn’t a huge, depressed mess.

— in fact, he thinks it’s really sweet that, despite the fact you should be worried about yourself so you don’t end up joining him in the afterlife, you spent your energy fussing over him

Korekiyo Shinguji

— with Kiyo, not much changes. at least, not on his end.

— he’s very fascinated by the mere notion of being a spirit and has the time of his life unlife getting used to his new body

— at first you’re happy for him. i mean, it’s good that he’s not struggling, right? shouldn’t you want him to feel okay? you wouldn’t want him to suffer in sadness like you, right?

— but he’s so enthralled with his new state of being he... almost forgets to check up on you

— and even when he does spend time with you, it almost feels like all he does is talk about himself and the new things he’s discovered about being a spirit

— it’s frustrating, to say the least. you know you didn’t truly lose him, but it feels like you did

— when you finally tell him that you feel like he’s changed, he’s confused

— when Kiyo hears you say how much you miss him, how you feel like he’s so different now, he’s kinda just like ???????

— how could he be different? it’s still him, don’t you know that?

— after a long night of reflecting while you sleep (not needing rest is one of the many perks of being a spirit), Kiyo realizes what he’s been doing wrong

— you used to love when he’d talk to you endlessly about his work, his research, etc.

— but now, when he’d ramble on for hours about new things he’d learned thanks to being a mere spirit, it was just another painful reminder to you that he was dead. that he was gone.

— the moment he gets a chance, he apologizes to you. it’s a bit of an emotional moment for both of you, being the first time either of you have confronted the end of Kiyo’s life head on

— he tries to hold you, but all you feel is an icy chill where his flesh would have met yours, but oddly enough... it doesn’t make you feel worse

— you’d anticipated another tsunami of your own tears after Kiyo’s body passed through yours, but it’s comforting, albeit in a morbid way

— he’s gone, but you haven’t lost him. and you’ll never lose him; he’ll remind you of that every day if he has to

Ryoma Hoshi

— man, if you thought ryoma’s attitude and general outlook on life was depressing before, you’ve got a big storm coming

— for a long time after his death, he’s very... cold. to everyone and everything

— he’s upset. but not because he’s dead, but because he can’t protect you anymore

— being there for you, to defend you and keep you safe, had become his raison d’être, so to speak

— he knows you can still see him and talk to him. he’s not stupid. but he pretends he doesn’t hear you at first. part of him thinks that if he shuts you out long enough, you’ll come to your senses and realize you should be upset with him

— but you never do. despite what he thinks he deserves, you never turn on him, never give up on him, never stop loving him

— with time, he’ll come around and start learning to cope with his own death, and the fact you outlived him

— and you’ll be there with him every step of the way (whether he likes it or not)

#mod nagito #danganronpa v3 #danganronpa v3 imagines #korekiyo shinguji x reader #kokichi ouma x reader #gonta gokuhara x reader #ryoma hoshi x reader #shuichi saihara x reader #rantaro amami x reader #kaito momota x reader #drv3 x reader #danganronpa x reader #drv3

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sulphuryasecretcloset · 3 years

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The Return of Drunk!Corin

I wasn’t planning on this one-shot, but the art deity @cacodaemonia wished for it and considering how endlessly kind she is to grace us with her art, it seems like the least I could do! I hope Zev’s sufferings can bring a smile! ;)

It's late. Zev'sonya empties the final content of her glass into her mouth and gets it down with a big swallow before placing the glass on the table. Time to go to bed. Those stupid ex-Troopers, still giggling and drinking over by the other table, are going to be wrecks tomorrow and someone has to be able to defend this place if something should happen.

Okay, so Mose hasn't indulged in anything but food and water and Din is still somewhat sober, but Zev'sonya hasn't seen Raga or Paz in a while and suspect they might be stowed away somewhere private and getting equally as drunk as these aforementioned ex-Trooper idiots.

At the opposite side of the room, Leo says something that has them all howling with laughter. It is the signal for her to hurry out of there before his drunken attention swings her way. It's even more difficult to snap at him when he's all soft and vulnerable like he tends to get on nights like these.

Getting up on her feet and walking towards the door, Zev'sonya is so busy focusing on dodging Leo that she forgets about the other threat in the room.

All it takes is an accidental brush of her arm against him as she walks by and the contact makes him turn towards her, arms reaching out and wrapping themselves around her a Deneba plant, and Zev'sonya abruptly finds herself trapped and hugged by a very drunk Corin Valentis.

Grunting annoyed as she's squeezed front first to his chest, she then gives him a couple of awkward pats on his back. “Yes, yes, thank you. Very nice. I was just leaving.”

“We never get to talk.” Corin says, his lips by her ear and his voice sounds both sleepy and happy, which he tends to get on nights like these. “I mean, I talk to Mose a lot. Leave-it too. But you... you tend to avoid me.” Suddenly there is a touch of sadness to his words as he continues; “I think you're awesome, but you don't like me much, huh?”

Zev'sonya twitches, feeling trapped by both his arms and his words. She does like him. She just doesn't do... this very well. Any other random man holding her like this would have been curled up in pain on the floor by now, but she knows Corin isn't hugging her to cop a feel and he won't try anything creepy. He just gets extremely tactile when he drinks and means no harm. “I like you just fine, Corin. I don't do small talk, that's all.”

Corin hums, all happiness again, still holding her close. “Yeah. You're like Din. You two get along.”

Zev'sonya frowns a little and moves her hand up to touch the skin on his neck. “You're hot.”

“Thank you.” Corin chirps. “You too.”

“No, I mean,” she feels the heat radiating from him, even through some of his clothes, “do you have a fever? Are you sick?”

“No.” Corin sounds unfazed. “I'm fine. Din just says I run warm. Whatever that means.”

“Oh.” Zev'sonya stands there and waits for him to let go. He doesn't, just rocks her gently and hums happily. She sighs and pats his back again. “Okay, right, time for me to leave.”

“Nooo....” Corin tightens his grip on her. “Stay. We'll be best friends. I'll make you bracelet.”

Gritting her teeth and losing patience, Zev'sonya lets her hands drop to her sides. “I will stab you.”

“No, you won't.” Corin leans back and lets go, but before she can escape he cups her face between his hand and holds her still to stare into her eyes. She can feel her cheeks getting squished by his palms and her lips pursing a little under the pressure.

Corin tries to give her a solemn look that keeps getting interrupted by his drunken smile. “Do you know why?”

She tries to glare.

“Because you're really a nice person.” Corin gives a sage nod. “Yes, you are. Mm-hm.”

She tries to glare harder.

“I've seen all the good things that you do. Even when you think no one is watching.” Corin leans in and rests his forehead against hers. “I know you care. About us. A lot. A whole bunch of lot.”

Zev'sonya's face flares up with embarrassed heat. “Corin.”

“You like to act all angry because you're hurting.” Corin continues in a soft tone. “I've been there. I understand.”

To her horror, Zev'sonya has a moment where her eyes sting with the threat of possible tears but luckily that brings the anger back and she starts squirming. “It's no act, I am angry. Corin, you-”

“It's okay.” Corin croons, dragging her into a new hug and wrapping his arms tight around her.

“Corin!” Zev 'sonya snaps. “Will you-”

“Oh my...” A familiar voice says.

Zev'sonya manages to turn her head and sees Leo standing there, staring at them. She exhales with relief. Finally the stereotypical male jealousy can be useful! “Could you-”

“Don't. Move.” Leo orders, waving his hands to underline the importance of his words. “This is so cute. I gotta get a holo-cam! Stay right there!” He runs off and leaves her stunned with disbelief.

Two and a half second after that, she's snapped out of her surprised apathy by a loud slurping noise.

Turning her head, she sees Mose standing there. He's holding a large drinking container with one of those straws to drink from, and he is looking at her and Corin with a smug expression on his face.

“Mose.”

“Lorda.” He replies, taking another sip, staying where he is.

Zev'sonya gestures to Corin and raises her eyebrows in a mute order to remove him.

Mose slurps some more before he lowers the drink and sighs with fake remorse. “So... do you remember when he was clinging to me and I asked you for help?”

“Yeah?” Zev'sonya grits out, remembering how she'd merely laughed and savored the sight.

“Exactly.” Mose goes back to slurping and watching, with not the faintest intention of rescuing her.

“This isn't funny” Zev'sonya growls, not calmed by Corin stroking her back in a soothing manner.

Mose shrugs. “A little bit.”

Zev'sonya can think of at least eleven ways to get back at him but doesn't get to hiss them in alphabetical order as there is yet another voice speaking up.

“What's going on?”

Again, Zev'sonya is hit with relief and she turns, as much as Corin will let her while he hushes her softly and strokes her back, so she can send a meaningful look at the Mandalorian standing nearby. “Din.” She gestures to the human leech attached to her. “Would you mind?”

Din crosses his arms while his helmet tilts in an almost thoughtful manner. And when he speaks, there is no hiding the grin in his words. “What's in it for me?”

Betrayal on all sides! Zev'sonya cannot believe what she's hearing. “A not-stabbed boyfriend!”

Corin hushes her again, squeezing her tight for a moment to underline how much he cares, and she is seconds away from just screaming with frustration when there is the flash of light and she sees Leo standing there with a holo-cam scanning them.

“No.” Zev'sonya states with no room for debate. “Leo, I'm warning you...” She squirms again but Corin isn't only warm, he's freakishly strong too and she is reluctant to use force. “Leo, leave it!”

Din clears his throat and steps over to the blond idiot, who simply keeps scanning them with the holo-cam with drunken determination. “Listen, if you want to slide in there, I could take the picture?”

Zev'sonya bares her teeth in pure fury while Leo gasps with delight; “Would you?”

Din grabs the holo-cam while Leo runs over. Zev'sonya is planning a harsh kick to Leo's shin, but before she can deliver it; Corin grabs her and turns her a little and suddenly they are cheek to cheek, with Leo kneeling in front of them, arms spread, - A loud slurp confirms Mose's towering shape behind them - and everyone facing the Mandalorian about to immortalize the moment.

“Smile!” Din declares cheerfully, as the rays from the holo-cam begin to scan them.

“I'm stabbing all of you!” Zev'sonya snarls.

The image turns out hideous. Corin and Leo are flustered, messy haired and grinning like idiots. Mose is leaning in behind them all to be in the image, still holding that big drinking container and sucking on that straw. And Zev'sonya herself? Well, she looks... grumpy.

It probably the least flattering image of herself she's ever seen.

But if Zev'sonya ends up saving that image instead of just deleting it? Well, then that's her business, isn't it?

#the mandalorian his son and the storm trooper #Corin the storm trooper #Corin Valentis #din djarin #Zev'sonya #Leave-it aka Leo #Mose the Hutt #the one-shots start coming and they don't stop coming

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everafterkeiji · 3 years

Text

Summary: When your first Christmas with Suga turns into a bit of a sweet mess.

Pairing: Koshi Sugawara x gn!reader

Word count: 3.4k

Genre: fluff

A/N: god help me i wrote this on INSTINCT, dropped EVERYTHING for this baby. Also happy holidays my lil melodies!!

"Asahi please stop freaking out."

Sugawara says through the phone as he hears complains and whines from Asahi, panicking where he misplaced Suga's gift for Y/N. He strictly ordered Asahi to hide his present for you knowing it's all you've been talking about for months. Next thing he knows, Asahi calls him completely frantic acting like he's completely destroyed their friendship.

Suga laughs as he hears random sounds from objects assuming Asahi was carelessly running through his house finding the beautifully wrapped gift. Meanwhile he was preparing all the ingredients needed for these extremely adorable Christmas inspired cupcakes that he and Y/N found. He was looking at the list of the things needed before setting everything on the kitchen counter.

"SUGA I'M SO SORRY. WHAT IF I LOST IT?"

"Asahi you're the tidiest person I know."

"I RUINED YOUR FIRST CHRISTMAS TOGETHER. I'M SUCH A TERRIBLE PERSON."

"Asahi! Please. It's too early and when you find it please just come over and bring it to me. Y/Ns got work from that cafe so we have time. I'll call you back okay? I'll just bake." He says before hanging up the phone, leaving a very stressed Asahi, feeling like there was a baring weight on his shoulders as he finds the gift.

Meanwhile Koshi has his tongue poking out as he figures out what the woman on the video just said. As he mixes the ingredients together, he can't help but smile when he realizes how important it was for the two of you.

As mentioned, it was your first Christmas together and this man was not going to pass up on the opportunity to show you how much you mean to him. You've got this lovesick fool wrapped around your finger, completely struck by your beauty and characteristics. You felt the exact same, feeling as if the gods gave you one of their prized possessions. How could you even deny the butterflies that surround you when he holds your hand, or even when he takes your bag on the way home.

Everything about him was already a gift from the heavens.

So here he was, completely forgetting what a budget meant, buying you the object you've been endlessly fangirling about it, even if you joked that you accepted him with a little bow wrapped around his head. Though he was willing to do it just to hear your laugh, he'd rather choose spoiling you instead. You can possibly imagine the way he looked, so confident swinging the little paper bag in his hands as he walked as if he won a lottery. He also bought you another gift that you didn't even request for. He just wanted to see the way your eyes would shine when you receive it.

As for you, you also forgot about your initial plan of spending less than what you expected. You didn't really settle on one thing, you had the cute idea of putting all the things he loved in a box along with all your photos together and with some heart warming letter you knew he would love. He loved the way you would stick notes on his favorite snacks and giving it to him when he was off to practice, or even the way he changed his alarm to you continuously telling him if he doesn't wake up he gets less hugs.

You figured that he adored your little acts of love instead of buying him a shirt or a sweater so you figured it benefitted your time preparation for his present. Also maybe buying everything that reminded him of you wasn't a brilliant idea.

It took you several days of torturing yourself from spilling the secret. You can never hide anything from your boyfriend- I mean how can you? One glance from his soft eyes was enough for you to surrender any information you've got so Daichi had to physically clasp his hand over your mouth just because he didn't trust that you have the ability to keep the secret to yourself. You thanked him knowing it was difficult to do especially when all you wanna do is ramble on how you found this plushie that you got him.

So when the universe put you two together, its absolutely the same for him.

He had to physically beg for Asahi to hide it from you knowing he was to be the least suspected one to just blurt out a secret. The con is Asahi was at the top for being anxious and being too caring. Though he deeply wished he picked Daichi, he figured he was practically a bridge for you two so he disregarded the idea. Seeing Asahi all worked up about the gift was quite humorous to Suga.

"Suga- honey do you know what that means?"

"Yes what is it darling?"

"We'll have our first Christmas together!" You exclaim, clapping your hands with a smile on your face as he chuckles draping an arm on your shoulder. He kisses the side of your head as you automatically lean into his touch.

"And I'm excited for everything, hun." He says with his heart jumping in glee at the idea of being under theChristmas lights with you, imagining you two snuggled up talking for hours just embracing the warmth of each other.

"Even New Years!"

Sugawara smiles as he reminisces the precious memories you two have made in the short amount of time. It amazes him how a person was able to consume his thoughts on a daily, how every second with you felt like he wanted it to last for a lifetime. You overwhelm his heart with so much adoration and he can't help but feel as if he was given a slice of heaven whenever he's around you.

"You do know Y/N likes you right?" Daichi asks as he sets the vice captains heart on fire with what he just said. Suga let's out a nervous giggle before waving his hand back and forth as an act of denial. Daichi laughs at his gestures, examining the pink tinted cheeks of his fellow teammate.

"C'mon, Suga."

"I-it's not like Y/N likes me back the way I do!" Daichi lets out another laugh as he runs a hand through his locks. Sugawara wipes the sweat from his forehead, finding it challenging to think about them having mutual feelings for each other. His mind can't focus on the probability of you two dating since he figured he'd feel as if he was on cloud nine if that were to happen. Another heat wave rushes to his cheeks as he shakes his head no.

"Koshi!" A voice shouts, making him yelp..his confession.

"YES I LIKE Y/N."

"ME?"

"Y/N?"

"SUGA!"

".. oh no."

He remembers how he wanted to faint that day, definitely disappointed he confessed to her opposite to what he had in mind. He wanted it to be in a calm place, only them with possibly a scenery in front of them but instead he got a funny confession, yelping like a girl before declaring his love in hopes what surprised him was Daichi but was faced with Y/N instead. In the eyes if the universe, it seemed too funny yet wholesome while Sugawara thinks it's too clumsy and could've been way better.

So with the disaster of a confession, he made it up to you by bringing you along on fantastic dates. Sugawara developing a habit of picking random things that you had on that date whether it'd be a tissue that you drew on a smiley face with, or the receipt of what you ordered that day. It was such a cute habit seeing him pick them up and just shoving it in his bag, he'll pretend he hid nothing but later on you saw a little box under his bed filled with the objects with dates on each of them.

"Koshi what's this?" You ask shaking the box in your hands as his eyes widen running to you and softly taking it away from your hands. He chuckles nervously, arms waving around you as if he was protecting it with his life. You laugh at his actions before attacking him from behind hugging him, trying to stop him from moving any farther. Suga let's out a war cry, desperate to not give into your embrace.

"NO I WILL NOT SURRENDER TO SUCH CUTENESS."

"WHAT IS IN THERE SUGA."

He trips as he walks, making you follow behind him, falling the same way he did. You fall to the floor laughing at the stupidity of you two. You were facing him as you take in the way his laughter was the best thing you've ever heard. He had his eyes closed with his smile brighter than the sun as his chuckle echoes through the room. You let your hand rest on his cheek before leaning in and kissing his temple. This quickly had the young man turn his head to you with flustered cheeks and sleepish smile.

"Seems like you're incredibly in love with me."

"What's so wrong with that?"

Before he could land a peck on your forehead, you grab the box from his hand earning a gasp of betrayal from your boyfriend as you quickly jog to a corner opening the box, and what was in this so called treasure chest was filled with random objects. As you take in the tissue in your hands, you see his handwriting on it with the date of your recent date. You smile as he comes behind you wrapping arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder.

"You know you're too cute for me, Suga. You're gonna make me have a heart attack with this."

"At least I can you were drop dead in love with me."

"Okay now- that wasn't cute."

This automatically carries a smile on your lips as you give the last customer their drink. Seems like everyone was affected by the chilly holiday feels since there were no customers that pissed you off like usual. Everyone was rushing to spend time with their families at home. Your family along with Suga's were spending the holiday together, happily welcoming the boy into your family. Although you found it funny when Suga acted so nervous when he was invited to spend it with them.

So as promised, your boss insisted everyone to go home early making you take your time in cleaning up.

"Asahi! You made it happy holidays!" Suga softly pats the ace's shoulder giving him a smile. Asahi does the same, setting down your gift on the table. Asahi takes a seat on the couch admiring the way the room was filled with decorations, with polaroids clipped with fairy lights, even a tiny Christmas tree in the corner borrowed from your parents.

"Seriously thank you for bringing it over, where did you find it?" Asahi chuckles as he removes his scarf.

"It was in my drawer all along. I thought I hid it in my cabinet so that's why I panicked." Suga shakes his head in amusement.

"I'd like to stay but my moms making me buy something from the store." Asahi says standing up. He hands Sugawara a box that was wrapped neatly with a gold ribbon at the middle. Suga's eyebrows were raised in confusion as he sees the little tag that said "To: Suga, From: Daichi and Asahi", he then smiles before handing a present to him as well. They both bid a thank you to each other before Asahi leaves.

As Suga leaves your present on the counter so he can continue cleaning up the mess he made from baking.

That's when he heard a knock to the door as he takes a peak in the little hole seeing his lovely lover standing in the doorway. Then he realizes that his present for you was just laying around and the kitchen was still pretty much a disaster. So he dashes as fast as he could.

You were replying to messages from Kiyoko and Yachi and he simply thanks the world that it was sparing him time.

And with such speed, comes with great responsibility. He accidentally knocks down the flour on the counter, where the tiny box was placed making it covered in flour making him puff in annoyance. With the dust making its way to his nostrils, this unfortunate makes him sneeze making the whip of air carry the flour residue land on his face, giving his face a powder like finish, along with his hair. This absolutely had him at complete shock as he hears the door open.

"Suga honey! Oh- what the hell happened." You say with a slight giggle as you snap a picture of your beloved boyfriend covered in flour. Looking back at the photo, you laugh even more, him swiftly hiding the flour covered box in his hands shoving it in his pockets.

"Y/N! Ah- I'm so sorry." He says before you set down your bag and remove your shoes as you set the cookies from the cafe on the counter. You take in how he looks with a frown on his plump lips as you smile softly before going over to him, your finger landing on the flour as your fingers swipe across your face joining him in the little flour art on either of your faces. He chuckles as his flour covered hands land on your cheek.

"How do you make it look so cute, sugar?" He asks as he gives a slight squish to your cheeks. You roll your eyes at his words as he places a delicate peck on your forehead.

"Are you sure it's really okay? I could clean this up all by myself you go ahead and take a shower!" He says but even if you insisted on helping him he disagrees.

"But-"

"Nope nope, I did this, it's my responsibility. Now shoo!" He says pushing your back to go on ahead and shower, the habit he's been doing to Kageyama and Nishinoya. You giggle at his actions before finally giving in to his demands.

During your well spent shower you hear a scream from the outside. You immediately grab your towel, wiping away the water in your eyes and wrapping it around your figure, frantically opening the door.

"Suga?!"

"Y/N wait no I'm fine!"

You look up to see smoke coming from the oven with your boyfriend in his adorable apron with matching mittens fanning his hands as he quickly brings out the tray of burnt cookies as you both lock eyes now both widening at the same time at the sight of you.

"Oh! Wait! Look away!"

"SUGA!"

"WAIT NO I SHOULD LOOK AWAY!"

Suga covers his eyes as he tries to stumble around the room trying to move around the counter. Thankfully, he screamed when you were finished showering so you grabbed the clothes you had from the room to help the poor boy, changing while he had his eyes covered. You still had your hair dripping wet but you immediately remove the hands from his face, revealing a very red Suga.

"Koshi, love. What happened?"

"I'm sorry! I can't believe I just messed up everything for our..first Christmas." Sugawara slides down on the floor feeling like he's lost all the time to make up for everything. Y/N sits beside him taking his had and leaning it your shoulder while your hands rummage through his hair, comforting him.

"Love, you didn't ruin it. I promise you that. If its any consolation, I think you look absolutely cute in your outfit." Sugawara lifts his head off your shoulder with a pout to his lips. You giggle at the sight of him before gently placing a peck on his pretty lips.

"And a frown doesn't suit it." You say before he chuckles bringing you into his arms, a move to hide his face. You laugh as he practically hugs you even tighter.

"Should we even bother to taste the cookies?"

"Oh please no I don't wanna go to the hospital on Christmas."

"Okay now gift giving time!"

Suga tugs on your hand underneath the table as you look at him, as he turns his head to the side signalling for the two of you to leave the table for a while. You excused yourselves. Suga leads you into the empty room as he excitedly sits down on the bed, and you followed his actions.

"So what are you up to, mysterious man?" You ask as Sugawara pulls out a tiny box from his pockets. Your eyebrows were raised, confused at the tiny little thing. He then goes behind you pushing back your hair as you feel a cold material hit your neck. Your fingers grazes over the thin material as you feel an circle charm on it that felt like there was distinct design from the texture. You close your eyes with a smile, already loving how he was so delicate. Once he locks it, you immediately hop off the bed rushing to the nearest mirror as your eyes set upon the dainty piece.

It was a gold necklace with a small disc charm in the middle with a letter S along with engravings of your favorite flower at the bottom. You gasp at how it was able to emit such beautiful details of the flowers. He wraps his arms behind you, resting his head on yours as light bounces off the mirror from where his finger was. Curious, you turned to him as you take a hold of each hand, then finding him wearing a ring with your initial with the same flower esque design on your necklace. It was placed in his ring finger and you covered your face, speechless at everything.

Suga takes this a sign that you were absolutely bewildered by his gift and he smiles as he pulls you into his arms.

"You're absolutely god-sent, it's unfair at this point." You say as he chuckles, he pulls away to see you pouting as he tucks a piece of hair behind your ear, letting his hand rest on your cheek like usual making you rest your cheeks weight on his hand.

"I know this isn't our only Christmas, we've got so many to go through. I just wanted us to start off strong with this. At least, even without a holiday or special occasion, we'll always feel like the other is around. Especially, it kinda looks like I'm married to you so what else can I complain about?"

You slap his chest jokingly feeling like the waterworks were coming to meet you. He pats your hair as he lets his eyes linger on you, setting your heart on fire with the way his eyes made you feel so safe and loved.

You wipe your eyes as you make your way to the cabinet, grabbing the present and handing it to him shyly. He remains silent as he opens the box to be greeted by his favorite snacks, an adorable plushie sprayed with your perfume, along with scattered letters and photographs of you two. He takes in one of the notes that his eyes landed on.

"My little ray of sunshine! Out of all the things I could say, you've left me speechless everytime. It's just pure luck that I managed to pull an angel like you. I genuinely hope you like this and not scold me for spending too much but how can I when I'm too in love with you? Merry Christmas, my love - Y/N."

He shouts in glee taking you by surprise as he basically tackles you on the bed, hugging you for the hundredth time today as he repeatedly kept saying thank you. You laugh, finally feeling relieved that he loved your gift. He sits up like a little kid reading every note that touched his hand and his eyes sparkle everytime. It surely was a sight that could make it feel like Christmas everyday. He hugs the plushie with all his love as you snap a photo of them, admiring the way his cheeks looked squished against the softness of the toy.

"Merry Christmas, honey." You say, curled up in his chest.

"Merry Christmas too, love."

He looks at you and he hums in happiness at the sight of the both of you, welcome in each others arms and nothing but endless smiles and laughter.

"I'm so in love with you."

"Good, believe it or not but I love you more."

#haikyu x reader #haikyuu sugawara #koshi sugawara #sugawara x y/n #sugawara x you #sugawara fic #haikyuu!!#nishinoya x reader #tsukishima fluff #hinata x reader #tsukishima x reader #hinata shouyou #kageyama x reader #daichi sawamura x reader #haikyuu asahi #asahi x you

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sweeethinny · 3 years

Text

The Third Time of Three

This was definitely what I expected the most! TW: Abortion

part 1 | part 2 | ao3

‘’Sorry’’ Ginny mumbled in the midst of sobs, lying in a fetal position on the bed while hugging her knees, feeling like scum, the worst of the species ‘‘Sorry’’ She could barely see a foot in front of her face

‘‘Please don’t say that’’ Harry was crying too, hugging her from behind and looking like he was about to pick her up to lull her like he did with his kids ‘‘Please Gin, don’t apologize’’

‘’I didn’t know .. I don’t-- ’’

‘’- I know my love, I know’’

Two days ago..

Harry and Ginny had decided to have another child, no matter how much James and Albus were being less argumentative with each other and the Weasleys had grown up considerably in the last few years, it seemed right.

And it felt right when he took his goddaughter Rose on his lap, or when they saw Ron braiding his daughter's hair, when Dominique climbed onto Harry's lap so she could makeup him, and when little Molly asked Ginny to teach her Flying. It felt right to try again.

Harry was no longer going on suicide missions and had become the Head of Aurors, which made his workload very short, and that Ginny was starting to think about retiring from the Harpies, since The Prophet offered a job as a journalist. James was at an important stage in his life and now he was beginning to enter a stage that he would be able to remember when he was older, and none of them wanted the boy's memories to be of his parents' absence. And Teddy was almost going to Hogwarts, which demanded even more attention.

But it seemed like a good time to try.

They tried - not that it was a horrible thing to do, honestly - and as much as it was sad when the test came back negative, they didn't give up.

Ginny had warned Gwenog this time, told her about the plans and that possibly she would not return after the third child, everything was going well.

Until she fell off the broom in the middle of the World Cup.

It had been chaos, from when the bludger hit her in the ribs and caused her body to be thrown away from the broom, until the time she fell on the floor unconscious, remembering nothing else.

Harry despaired, there was a frightening amount of blood on the floor and Ginny looked quite hurt even though he saw it from several feet up. For a few seconds, as he stared at her lying on the floor, he thought he had lost her. He thought that for some cruel reason, his children would be without their mother, they would lose the best person they had ever met.

But she moved, very little, but she moved, and he started breathing again.

In the next instant, Harry was in the Hospital, walking in the room where Ginny was, still unconscious and looking absurdly fragile. Molly had stayed with the boys, however much Teddy looked like he was about to break down and Albus seemed to lose his lungs with every step his grandparents took away from Harry. James was darkly silent, looking over his grandfather's shoulder towards his father, as if he expected Harry to disappear forever. He later blamed himself for leaving the boys that way, without even explaining that he would return.

When Ginny woke up, she barely remembered where she was or what had happened, the healers kept her under observation until they were sure that everything was fine, and that she would not have any fallout. And when Healer Swattye arrived with the papers in hand, they expected the worst, because no one would bring good news with that face;

‘‘I’m sorry Mrs. Potter, but you lost the baby’’

Ginny has been blaming herself ever since, crying endlessly since she knew, avoiding anyone but Harry, hiding inside the room and finding herself the worst of monsters.

''Albus is worried'' Harry said after her crying soothed, hugging her to his chest and stroking her red hair ''Let him in just to see that you're okay'' He asked, already imagining that his son could barely make it stop in place, anxious about the mother's silence since they returned from the Hospital

‘’What if he sniffs that I’m a bad mother? Children can feel’’ She murmured against his chest, her voice shaky and low. Harry had thought he had never felt so much pain in his life

‘’You’re not, Gin. You will never be .. You didn't know you were pregnant and the Bludger was really strong'' Harry repeated for what seemed like the tenth time, but he wouldn't stop until Ginny understood ''Let the boys come and see you, it'll be good'' The woman sighed, seeming to ponder, before nodding. ‘’I’ll call them’’

Harry knocked on Teddy's room, knowing that the three were there, as they had been since they had returned, sleeping together and holding each other as if they were going to be safer. ‘’Mom wants to see you’’ He said, taking Albus on his lap and waiting for Teddy and James to get up.

The second, had not yet expressed any reaction beyond the silence - deafening - and the few words he had spoken during breakfast today, commenting on not wanting to go to his grandparents' house.

Harry thought he was the one who was suffering the most from Gin's situation.

As soon as they opened the bedroom door, Ginny was sitting on the bed, still looking crying, but at least she smiled when Teddy and Albus ran to the bed, throwing themselves on the mattress and hugging her as if she had run away for decades. James continued to hug Harry's leg.

‘’Come on buddy, I’m going with you .. Mommy wants to see you too’’ Harry whispered, lowering himself to the son who looked like he was about to cry, his brown eyes shining towards his parents bed

‘’Doesn’t she love us anymore?’’ James also whispered, looking at his dad this time.

''Of course she does, she is just in pain… she is missing you'' Harry looked at Ginny, who faced the situation as if it were a horror movie, still being hugged by the other two boys, but still looking about to cry again with the reluctance of the other son ''Come on, let's go'' James moved, accompanying Harry to the bed and climbing with the impulse his father had given him, sitting next to Gin's waist, looking at her with curiosity.

''Mommy, are you okay?'' James asked, not taking his eyes off her eyes ''Daddy said you got hurt'' Ginny swallowed, her heart aching in her chest, wanting to pull the boy close but also wanting respect your moment.

‘’Mom will stay’’ She said hopefully

''I wish I came here to read to you, like you did when I fell, but Dad said I needed to be with Al .. I took care of him, Mom, I didn't fight'' James was still serious, but now his eyes were running tears. Gin was the same, and she couldn't take much longer, pulling him into the collective embrace, kissing the top of his head

''Thank you dear, Teddy told me that you were very patient'' The godson nodded, smiling at James, lying on Gin's shoulder as if he were still small, while Albus was precisely lying with his head on her belly, as if wanted to hear what was inside. James lay on the other shoulder, within her embrace.

‘‘I was scared’’ James whispered in her ear ‘‘But I knew you were coming back’’.

[...]

Ginny managed to sleep that night, and the others too, even when Harry had to leave at dawn to help an Auror who was calling him, and Teddy came to lie with her, hugging her and barely keeping his eyes open for more than a minute before to go back to sleep (and she knew there was Harry's finger on it). She was recovering.

She went to see a healer a few days later and followed his orders about retiring entirely from Quidditch, in order to avoid more moments like that. Ginny could barely contain a few tears when Gwenog hugged her and thanked her for all the years they had worked together, and that she fully understood that it was time for her to go. Asking her to be kind in sports columns involving the Harpies.

And after a few months, after telling her mother what had happened and crying like a baby in her lap; she and Harry tried again.

The healer had said that maybe it would take time, her body was weakened and maybe it would be better for her to talk to the Muggle obstetrician and gynecologist who had delivered the baby and all the monitoring of James and Albus, just to clear conscience.

She and Harry listened carefully to the doctor, did the tests, and Ginny told about the loss of the baby and how it had affected her. Dr Iven, as always, had been calm and empathetic with her situation, reaffirming - even if she had not spoken - that she was not a bad mother for having lost her child and that this was more than she could have imagined.

‘’But now, we’re going to work for the next one to come, and to be healthy’’ He said, before prescribing some more routine tests.

In the first month, nothing happened. Not in the second, or in the third, or in the sixth ... Nothing. But then, after Teddy's 10th birthday (where he secretly asked for a little sister), a few weeks later, Ginny was in a much bigger spurt than usual, and she was sweating a lot, even if it was autumn.

At first she thought it was because working with Rita Skeeter was really stressful, but the woman had spent a week in Wales. Afterwards, she thought she might be entering menopause, but it was impossible, witches only entered after 100 years old. So Ginny took off all her clothes and put herself in front of a mirror, just because she had read this in one of the magazines that Dr Iven kept it at the clinic.

Her breasts were heavier, and her stomach seemed higher than normal, and her vaginal lips were darker, as indicated in the magazine that was due to blood flow in early pregnancy.

It didn't take long for her to put on her clothes and apparate near the Muggle pharmacy, buying several pregnancy tests and then returning home. It was late afternoon, Harry was in the yard helping Albus to plant whatever he had gotten from Neville, James was hanging out with Ron, Mione and Rose, and Teddy would only come tomorrow ... She could hardly stand her curiosity, but she held on until it was later and Harry could be on the side, just because Ginny would feel safer that way.

‘’I bought pregnancy tests’’ She commented as soon as her husband closed the door to their room after putting the two boys to sleep ‘‘I haven’t done any’’

‘’Do you think you are .. are you pregnant? Forget it, of course it does'' They both laughed ''Whatever the outcome, I'm here'' Harry said, and she nodded, running to the bathroom and lowering her pants, anxious to pee soon ''Not even with me you get naked so fast''

''I had three liters of water in the last two hours, I need to pee'' The two were silent while Ginny peed as much of the test as she could, placing them on top of the sink and barely being able to get up from the toilet, hiding her face in her hands and trying not to create too much expectation.

‘’I love you’’ Harry whispered, sitting across from her on the floor ‘‘So much’’

‘’Me too’’ Ginny looked at him, smiling and feeling her chest rumbling with each heartbeat ‘’ How long?’’

‘’One minute’’ He looked at the watch on his wrist ‘‘I think I might pass out at any time’’

‘‘Please don’t’’ Ginny laughed, taking a deep breath and looking at the test row. She wanted it so badly, wanted so much more opportunity ... one last time. Maybe if a girl came now, a little redhead - just this once ... Of course, she would love the baby with her whole life, regardless of sex.

‘’Three minutes’’ Harry spoke, but remained still, looking at her

‘’You take it, I can’t look’’ Ginny hid her face again, blood pounding in her ears .. She wanted it so badly…

''Ginny?'' Harry was trembling when she looked at him, he was looking at the row of tests and tears were falling from his eyes as if it were a running tap, a small smile formed, before giving way to a huge one ''We will be parents’’.

#Harry Potter #Harry and Ginny #harry x ginny #next gen harry potter #Harry!Dad #ginny potter #Ginny!Mom #hinny headcanon #hinny #hinny fanfic #read-a-hinny-fic #hp next gen #harry potter next generation #Teddy Lupin #James Sirius Potter #Albus Severus Potter #lily luna potter

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stxphxn-strange · 3 years

Text

spun sugar (written for the ironstrange fanfic challenge)

Summary: He didn’t feel like going out, but he needed a distraction. Nothing would be able to take his mind off of the phone call he was waiting for, the call he knew would never come. Not even a double date to the carnival with Anthony, Hope, and Christine kept him focused today, and he was actually starting to need a distraction from his distraction.

a/n: just a heads up that this fic is on the heavier side of angsty so please be careful and safe! tw: for homophobia/mentioned use of slurs, outing, death (drowning), and family issues, and i think that’s it

Today felt like the world’s longest deja vu episode. It felt like standing in line at a carnival for hours, only to spin endlessly on one of those teacup rides. Everything was an unbreakable cycle of doubt, confusion, anger, and the old familiar self loathing. So for Stephen, it was just Thursday.

She didn’t forget.

She probably forgot!

She didn’t forget. She didn’t call on purpose.

She knows what today is.

She doesn’t want to talk to me.

I don’t want to talk to her either, and yet I still wish she’d call. Maybe then I could pretend that things are sort of okay.

Stephen sighed, completely tuning out his professor. He hadn’t been paying attention all class and wasn’t going to start now. There were more important things to be thinking about, like the nap he was going to take when he got home, or the fact that it was Victor’s birthday.

It was Victor’s birthday, and Stephen wanted to plan some sort of surprise call and later invite his brother to visit him in the city. Eugene immediately took to the idea and offered to help plan it and reach out to more of the family, but there was a catch. Of course Beverly had to be involved in some capacity. Even if she didn’t want to be associated with her older son, her younger one was near and dear to her heart and she wouldn’t hesitate to do anything for him. Except this, apparently, because that would involve speaking to Stephen. The med student didn’t expect to hear back from his mother and truthfully never expected a lot from her generally, but his hopes were still up.

Waste of time. She doesn’t need me.

She doesn’t even want me.

Stephen checked the time again. His lecture would be over in 15 minutes, and the next one started in half an hour. That gave him enough time to grab a coffee and call his dad on the walk across campus, and to make the time pass now he’d organize his inbox.

Most of his messages weren’t surprising (they were mainly just calendar invites and the occasional email from Anthony with an article Stephen might like) or even worth reading, but Stephen was a bit surprised when Eugene called him first. He had a solid relationship with his dad, but it was still unfamiliar for Stephen to have his family approach him first. Usually it went the other way around.

“I was just about to call you,” he said. “What’s going on? Mom never told me when the family call is”

“That’s the bad news,” Eugene replied. “Your mom changed the plan.”

“So she shut me out? Again? Is that what I’m supposed to understand?” Stephen asked, his voice cracking like the thinnest sheet of winter ice under heavy footfalls. “I didn’t do anything.”

Eugene sighed. “I’m sorry.” That was all the confirmation Stephen needed.

“What happened?” He asked. “She would do anything to make Victor happy, even if it means acknowledging me as part of the family.”

“Which you are,” Eugene argued.

“Not according to Mom, and you know that,” Stephen replied. “Please just tell me what happened, my next class starts soon.”

“Your aunt called to wish Victor a happy birthday and then was chatting with your mom about the family, as they do. I think she asked your mom how you were doing and how your love life in school was going, but at that point I wasn’t really listening. You know that your aunt is one of my few in-laws I actually tolerate, maybe even like, and today she proved exactly why. Claudia said something about you, and based on your mom’s reaction it wasn’t what she wanted to hear,” Eugene explained. “She knows you’re gay and is really happy for you, against your mom’s expectations and wishes that she’d be ashamed.”

“That was the first time they’ve talked about my sexuality, right? Because I never came out to her. I assume Maxwell brought it up for some reason because I came out to him years ago. Why he’d bring it up now, I don’t know,” Stephen replied.

“As far as I know, this is the first time Claudia brought it up. I assume if they’d talked about it before, your mother would’ve gotten angry or cut her off. She wasn’t happy today,” Eugene said bluntly. It wouldn’t do any good to sugarcoat the truth when Stephen already knew all of this.

“Great! Mom’s already mad enough at me for coming out and being proud of myself. I bet I ruined her relationship with Aunt Claudia because I blabbed and Maxwell clearly takes after Mom since he outed me for no reason!” Stephen snapped. He took a deep breath, his head spinning. “Sorry for yelling, Dad.”

“I don’t need you to apologize. You have every right to be hurt, for a lot of reasons,” Eugene said. “But to make a long story short, she told me flat out that she wouldn’t be talking to you today and then left for work at the same time she always does.”

“Can I talk to Victor at least? I don’t care if she doesn’t want to talk to me, but I can’t ignore him,” Stephen pleaded. “I can’t not be there for him on his birthday, that’s cruel!”

“I know you want to be there for your brother, it’s okay. That’s the good news and why I called you. Give me a minute,” Eugene replied.

Stephen mumbled some kind of response, slowly but impatiently shifting his weight from side to side. He was thinking about blowing off the rest of his classes for the day, emotional exhaustion overtaking him. He could usually power through things like this, as he was used to his mother steadfastly refusing to accept him. Today she and her hatred actively prevented Stephen from wishing his little brother a happy birthday, and that was too damn much. The fact that his cousin suddenly outed him almost three years after Stephen came out was only making him angrier. Stephen always tried to do the best that he could for his family, especially his younger sibling(s), and was even more protective of Victor in the wake of Donna’s death. All he wanted was to look after everyone he cared about, and his sexuality didn’t negatively affect his protective oldest child instincts. If anything it made them stronger because Stephen always wanted to be an ally for his siblings. He would always stand up for them when they needed.

Sometimes he felt like he failed Donna, despite his best efforts to keep her safe and make her happy. Stephen couldn’t fail Victor and let their mother’s actions come between them. He wouldn’t. He looked at his phone to distract himself, editing his coffee order to include a latte for Anthony. He was usually home around this time and would more than likely appreciate the surprise coffee.

Thinking of his boyfriend, the love of his life and his person, made Stephen smile just enough to prevent him from sobbing in the middle of Starbucks.

Two (2) minutes that felt like an eternity later, Victor came to the phone. “Hello?”

“Happy birthday Vic!” Stephen forced a smile, hoping some cheer could be detected in his voice.

“Thank you,” Victor replied with an emotion that Stephen couldn’t place.

“Sorry I couldn’t be there today or join the family call. I wanted to be part of the call at least, but…”

“It’s okay. I know you care, and I know you wouldn’t forget my birthday just because you’re busy.”

“Right… busy!” Stephen’s laugh was forced. “I would never miss your birthday, and not just because I have a flawless memory.”

“I was just starting to miss you until you said that. Damn shame.”

“Not only is today your birthday, it’s apparently also the start of you acting like the smartass you‘ve grown up to be,” Stephen quipped. Eugene’s noisy laughter could be heard even over the phone.

“I didn’t come into this world as a smartass like you. I had to learn from you, unfortunately,” Victor replied. “And I’m glad to see you’re amused, Dad!”

“I taught you everything I know, and this is how you thank me?” Stephen asked.

The barista called out Stephen’s order.

“Hey I have to get going, but you and Dad should come visit me in New York sometime soon,” Stephen offered.

“That sounds nice, but you can also just call me. Contrary to popular belief I do want to talk to you on days that aren’t holidays,” Victor replied. “But New York sounds fun.”

I wish we could talk whenever, like we used to when I was welcome under her roof.

“I want to go to the city, I’m sick of the neighbors,” Eugene added. “We’ll have to plan a trip, but for now we’ll let you get ready for class.”

“Thanks Dad. Love you both, and I hope you have a great birthday, Vic!” Stephen hung up before they could reply, grabbed his coffees, and dragged his feet the rest of the way home.

++++

Anthony was in the kitchen, serenely flipping through a magazine and eating lunch when Stephen trudged in. He paid no mind to the door opening at first, dipping his grilled cheese into the steaming cup of soup beside him and continuing to peruse the pages.

Stephen smiled fondly at the sight of him, the tiniest bit of joy finding its way to his heart.

“I got you a latte,” Stephen said, setting both drinks on the counter.

Anthony gasped, curiously ignoring the coffee completely and standing up to hug Stephen. “Thank you cuore mio.”

“I figured I’d surprise you since I’m home early,” Stephen replied. He relaxed into the hug, slouching in Anthony’s arms.

“I appreciate that, but I’m much happier to see you. We both left at weird times this morning so we didn’t get to talk and get ready for the day together like we usually do,” Anthony said, a little pout on his face.

“Well we’re both home now, and I’m really tired.” Stephen was beyond tired and beyond annoyed, swaying a bit in Anthony’s arms.

Anthony hugged him closer and tighter to steady him. “Let’s go sit. Did you have lunch?”

“No, I just got coffee and came right home,” Stephen replied.

Anthony handed over the other half of his sandwich. “Take this then, I just made it. There’s tomato soup too, since Bucky made me go to Panera with him earlier.”

Stephen was about to object, stopping himself only when he saw the mirthful light in Anthony’s eyes. “What?”

“I mean I don’t mind either way, but I’m giving this to you so you don’t swipe it from me like the mischievous, overgrown British shorthair you are,” Anthony teased. “You’re not subtle.”

“If I was a cat, we both know I’d be a calico,” Stephen replied.

“I disagree. What are you doing for the rest of the afternoon?” Anthony asked.

Stephen shrugged. “I kind of want to nap. Preferably with you, under a blanket, and in front of the fireplace.”

“That sounds nice,” Anthony murmured, reaching up to softly caress Stephen’s cheek. “Let’s go, then.”

As soon as they were settled, Stephen rested his head on Anthony’s shoulder and practically melted into his side.

They made idle chatter and finished their lunch, Stephen glancing at his phone every now and then.

It’s stupid to hope something will change.

He knew his mom wasn’t going to call him, and that still stung no matter how much he tried to move past it. Stephen also knew she wouldn’t ever accept him again, and she’d continue to use his identity against the rest of the family who he loved and who loved him in return. Be it immediate family or the most distant relatives, Beverly was determined to exile him completely, erasing her oldest son from the family story.

Victor probably suffered the most from this, aside from obviously Stephen himself. Contrary to what their mother thought, Victor deserved to talk to whoever he wanted on his birthday, including Stephen. Being the middle child, Victor was the link between cautious Stephen and carefree Donna. The three siblings were incredibly close growing up, and their sister’s death took as much of a toll on Victor as it did on Stephen. Stephen almost left home for good a few days after Donna’s funeral, almost leaving his little brother behind. It was impossible to forget anything about that day.

Stephen knocked on his brother’s door.

“It’s open!” Victor was sitting on the floor building a Lego castle.

Stephen sat on the floor across from him. “This looks really good, Vic!”

“Do you want to help me finish it?” Victor asked.

“I can’t today. I actually came in to tell you that I might be leaving home for a little bit,” Stephen replied. He rested his head on one of his hands.

“When do you leave?” Victor asked, still not looking at him.

“Tonight or early tomorrow. I’m going to New York to help Anthony move,” Stephen said, making up a reason as he finished answering. It was true that he was going to New York to see Anthony, but he couldn’t tell Victor the real reason why. He’d already been through enough the past few days, he didn’t need to know that Stephen and Beverly weren’t on speaking terms as of today. He didn’t need to know that their mother was trying to kick Stephen out.

Victor just sat quietly and nodded, not registering his brother’s distress. “So you have time to help me build then. Can you hand me that brick, please?”

Stephen smiled sadly and obliged.

They were quiet, just working together like nothing was wrong until an overwhelming clamor filled the farmhouse.

“Dad’s home,” Stephen remarked.

“Are he and mom arguing?” Victor asked. “Why?”

Stephen knew why, but he held his tongue and just shrugged. “I’m not sure.”

Victor nodded and went back to building. “Make sure you follow the directions, I want this to be perfect.”

They continued to work diligently, not saying much to each other but listening to the argument from the kitchen. It wasn’t easy to make out what Mr. and Mrs. Strange were saying, but their mutual anger hung in the air long after the conversation ended. The whole house felt different, its welcoming energy replaced with something sinister.

And then someone knocked on the door. “Boys?”

“Hi Dad!” Victor said. “You can come in, Stephen is helping me build the castle set that you gave me!”

Eugene walked in, standing in the doorway and watching his sons work for a minute. “Stephen, can I talk with you for a minute? Sorry to tear you away from your building, but you can finish up later. I also brought home dinner. Victor, go eat with Mom before it gets cold.”

“Cool, thanks Dad!” Victor stepped cautiously over his castle and headed downstairs.

Stephen was still on the floor, Eugene sitting at Victor’s desk. He didn’t know what this conversation was going to be like, and fear made him snatch the first words without giving them much thought.“Dad, I fucked up.”

“I’m going to be honest, I don’t see it that way,” Eugene said.

Stephen had been staring at the carpet until then, looking sharply up at his father. “What?”

“I said I don’t see it that way. You didn’t mess up,” Eugene repeated himself.

“Mom wants me to go,” Stephen mumbled. He hung his head again, looking at the carpet. Victor’s room was the only carpeted one in the house, and no one knew why.

“Your mother also wants me to stop leaving my computer in the dining room since that’s apparently ‘her space,’ but last I checked this is our home and she doesn’t have a monopoly on that room,” Eugene replied.

Stephen was quiet for a minute. “She says it’s not my home. Not anymore, anyway.”

“That’s what we were arguing about,” Eugene said. “I came home from work and she told me what you talked about and how she felt. I don’t agree with her.”

“I wanted to tell you myself,” Stephen muttered. “She had no right to tell you, that’s not what you’re supposed to do!”

Eugene didn’t say anything, unsure of what he could say to make this better.

“I didn’t time this well, I know, and I’m sorry. I should’ve given Mom more time to process losing Donna, and—”

“Stephen, I think your mother would’ve responded the same way if your sister was here. It’s nothing to do with the circumstances and everything to do with her,” Eugene said.

Stephen nodded slowly. “Are you upset with me Dad?”

“No I’m not, and I don’t think you should go,” Eugene replied.

“I probably should, for a few days,” Stephen said. “Anthony’s in New York, and I know I just saw him but I wanted to go visit again before he leaves for boarding school.”

Eugene nodded. “As long as you’re back at least a day before your school year starts.”

“Mom isn’t going to want me to come back, but I don’t want to leave Victor! I can’t abandon him!” Stephen said.

Eugene shook his head. “It’s not up to her. You’re our son, mine and hers equally, and I want you to be home with us while you finish high school. Besides, you and Victor need each other especially now. Your mom isn’t the only one who decides what family means. You are both our sons, and though our family might be a little smaller, we’re still family.” Eugene grabbed a box of tissues from Victor’s desk, handing them to Stephen as he began to cry.

“Thanks Dad.”

“It’s going to be okay. What day are you planning on going to New York?”

“I booked a flight for early tomorrow morning, Ant said anytime in the afternoon he’d be around.”

“And are you going to finally stop pining for each other and tell him how you feel while you’re there?”

“Dad!” Stephen hesitated before continuing. This was unfamiliar territory, discussing his love life with his father. Eugene knew Anthony and could obviously tell how Stephen felt, but it was weird to talk about this. Still, curiosity got the better of him. “Do you think I should?”

To make a long story short, that’s how they ended up here, in the apartment they shared with three of their friends while Anthony repeatedly nudged Stephen with his elbow.

“What do you want?” Stephen muttered, failing to even pretend like he was annoyed.

“Scoot over so I can go to the kitchen!” Anthony said, the slightest hint of a whine in his voice.

Stephen shifted and grumbled a little protest as he stood up.

Anthony smiled and kissed the top of his head. “I’ll be right back, then you can cling to me as much as you want.”

Stephen sighed, half in teasing exasperation, and looked at his phone again. He was staring daggers at it when Anthony returned, letting it go when he was pulled into a hug.

“Did you hear back from her yet? What time is the call?” Anthony asked gently, beginning to stroke Stephen’s hair.

“She hasn’t called yet.” That wasn’t a lie, but Stephen was too upset to give Anthony more details right now.

Anthony hummed, kissing his head again. “She will.”

“I don’t— yeah. She will,” Stephen mumbled. Also not a lie, as he was still clinging to the thinnest shred of hope that his mom would change her mind.

She won’t.

It doesn’t matter how much she loves Victor and values his happiness, I’m dead to her and that’s final.

“How was your day?” Stephen asked, eager if not desperate to change the subject. “Did you present the business plan you were telling me about? How did it go?”

“I did! Honestly it went really well, I wasn’t nervous like I usually am,” Anthony replied.

Stephen yawned. “I’m so happy for you. Every time you practiced presenting it to me, you were amazing.” He was physically and mentally weary, exhaustion dragging him into a midnight blue haze, but he was never too tired to give Anthony the praise he deserved.

“Thank you,” Anthony murmured. His eyes were closed, but Stephen could practically hear Anthony’s soft smile.

“I mean it,” Stephen said. “Love you.”

He was surrendering to the exhaustion, to the warmth of the fire and the blanket and Anthony’s embrace. Sometimes knowing that Anthony loved him and feeling the manifestations of his love made Stephen feel a little better. This was reprieve, and he was going to revel in it until reality came back to kick his ass.

Anthony still sounded like he was smiling. “I love you too. Get some rest sleepyhead.”

++++

Anthony woke up first, his phone ringing loudly from the carpet below. He was going to just ignore it, mistaking the notification for an alarm, until he came to his senses a little more and realized Christine was calling.

“Your boyfriend is bad at answering his phone,” she’d said.

“Hello to you too, Christine. He’s sleeping,” Anthony replied. “We both were, actually.”

“So sorry to have interrupted your mid afternoon nap,” Christine drawled. “But I’m glad you were resting. Stephen seemed really off today during class, and as much as I hate to admit it I was a bit worried.”

“You’re too much of a helicopter parent friend to pretend like you’re not concerned,” Anthony said. “I can see right through that.”

Christine just laughed. “Anyway, I know you could talk about Stephen for probably years but I called for a reason.”

“What’s up?” Anthony asked. Stephen was still asleep in his arms, and Anthony tried his best not to disturb him. “Everything okay?”

“Oh yeah I’m fine! I was just gonna ask if you two wanted to go on a double date with me and Hope later? It’s the first night of the carnival,” Christine said. “Sam and Bucky aren’t planning on going until tomorrow because they’re boring, and we want an adventure.”

“Going out on a Thursday night counts as an adventure?” Anthony asked.

“Why wouldn’t it?!” Christine protested. “Let me know what you decide to do and just text me or Hope, we can plan to meet up later. I take it Stephen isn’t going to class but I am, so I’ll talk to you later.”

“Sounds good, bye Christine!” Anthony rolled his eyes in amusement, opening a game on his phone and holding Stephen closer.

It wasn’t more than twenty minutes later when he woke up, checking his phone and trying to hide his disappointment when his mom didn’t call.

What did I expect? She made up her mind.

She doesn’t want to talk to me.

Why am I pretending she cares, hoping she’ll call?

Stephen huffed out a sigh, more angry with himself than anything else.

“Nothing yet?” Anthony asked gently.

“No,” Stephen replied. He felt anger boiling in his system, unease taking over as he continued to lie and hope that something would change.

“I’m sorry,” Anthony said. “The day is still young.”

“I guess that’s true.” Stephen didn’t know if going along with what Anthony said was helping or hurting at this point. “I have a ton of missed calls from Christine though.”

“Oh yeah, she invited us on a double date with her and Hope since it’s the first night of the carnival,” Anthony replied. “You in?”

“Not really.” Stephen answered without even giving it much thought.

“Okay.” Anthony was always so amenable, sensitive, and empathetic, even at the expense of what he wanted. Sometimes Stephen’s heart ached at how selfless Anthony was and how much he cared for people. It was a privilege to be someone Anthony loved, but Stephen had to remind him constantly that relationships were a give and take. He didn’t want to drain Anthony’s kindness, not the way people in his past did. He wanted and tried to be as giving and loving to Anthony as Anthony was to him.

He didn’t even sound upset about not going out, but Stephen’s anxiety kicked in and convinced him otherwise. “Well wait Ant, what do you want to do?”

“It might be fun, but—”

“Why not go, then?”

Anthony was stunned by how fast Stephen changed his mind, trying to read his face for things his words left unsaid. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine… just a little jittery waiting for this stupid call. A distraction might help, and you’re right! It probably will be fun. Plus I don’t want to selfishly keep you from being out with friends, that’s not fair to you.”

“Nope, you stop that right now,” Anthony admonished gently. “If I wanted to go with our friends, I would. I want to spend time with you tonight, whatever that looks like, and we’re both allowed to want things. They don’t have to be the same thing, and you’re not selfish or controlling for disagreeing with me. Believe me?”

“I wish I could, because I know you mean it. I just feel like a failure since I can’t be there for Victor the way I want,” Stephen replied. “And I know it’s not my fault, but…”

“But it still hurts.” Anthony gently cupped his face and leaned in to kiss him. “Right?”

Stephen nodded, whispering a pained “yes,” into the kiss. It hurt more than Anthony knew, more than he was ready to discuss.

“You’re not a failure. You’re just trying to make everyone happy even when the most fucked up circumstances get in the way. It’s not a bad thing to prioritize yourself, and in fact it’s a good thing to give yourself the kindness you give to others. You have to,” Anthony said, protectively wrapping his arms around Stephen.

“I’m glad you listen to my advice enough to repeat it back to me, at the very least,” Stephen quipped.

“Yeah yeah, I know I sound like a hypocrite since I—”

“Since you’re not nice to yourself, even though you deserve to be,” Stephen finished his sentence. “I just want to be able to make someone happy today. I want to make you happy.”

Anthony smiled sadly and kissed him again. “I love you so much, you idiot. You always make me happy, and I’m always here for you.”

“I know you are. I love you too,” Stephen replied. “A distraction honestly might help me deal with the waiting game, though.”

“It could!” Anthony nodded, playfully adding, “I’ll make it worth your while.”

“Oh yeah? How?” Stephen played along.

“We can start by getting your favorite sushi,” Anthony offered.

Stephen genuinely smiled at that, attempting to hide it by burying his head in Anthony’s shoulder. “Really?”

“Why not?” Anthony replied. “It’s been awhile since we went to that restaurant anyway.”

“It’s been too long,” Stephen corrected him. “I’m not sure if I’m feeling up to being out for dinner and then going out later, though. I feel bad because you’re trying so hard to plan something fun, and—”

“You don’t have to feel bad. It’s not a problem, we can just order in and stay home until later. That’s what I was planning anyway,” Anthony said. “And if you don’t feel like going out tonight, we really don’t have to.”

“I want to, but I also don’t,” Stephen said. “You know what I mean?”

Anthony nodded. “Yeah, I do. I’m fine with whatever though, it’s up to you.”

“Let’s go then. I’m still kind of on the fence, but I’m leaning towards yes.”

++++

He was just being himself, but Anthony was making good on his little teasing promise to make the fair worth Stephen’s while. He had some magical effect where his smile made anyone’s heart sing, and his spell was especially powerful on Stephen. He was truly having fun, for the most part. His motion sickness didn’t flare up at any point, which meant he could spin a bit faster than normal on the teacups ride. It was exhilarating and just dizzying enough that he leaned slightly into Anthony’s shoulder while the group decided what to do next. Stephen found he was oddly at peace with himself and the evening, probably because of Anthony’s spell.

“Okay, here’s what I want to know: what the hell is a hall of mirrors?” Anthony asked.

“How do you not know?” Christine replied, her eyebrows racing up towards her hairline.

“Never in my life have I been exposed to anything that would entail being in a hall of mirrors,” Anthony muttered.

“Surely you’ve been to a carnival before, right?” Hope asked.

“Yes, and amusement parks! But again, I have no idea what it actually is,” Anthony said. “I’ve never seen one until right now.”

“It’s just as it sounds, Ant. It’s a room full of mirrors, almost like a maze I think, and some of the mirrors are distorted. It’s hard to explain without seeing it, but it’s kind of funny,” Stephen replied. “You’re the only person in life who ever gives me an answer,” Anthony half-joked, linking arms with Stephen. “The only person.”

“Rude, didn’t I just tell you the other day about—”

“Hope I love you but I made my point very clear,” Anthony teased. “I need to see these mirrors.”

Stephen smiled. Anthony was so full of an almost childlike wonder, he was kind of like the human equivalent of a ferris wheel… somehow… the comparison made more sense in his head. “This is going to be adorable.”

“Can we go?” Anthony was almost bubbly with excitement.

Stephen couldn’t say no to him, and right now he didn’t want to. “Yeah, come on.”

“It’s this way, let’s go!” Christine pointed vaguely to her left and led the way.

Stephen didn’t know what Anthony expected to see in a room that was literally just Full Of Mirrors, but his every reaction to it was more endearing than the last.

“Could you imagine decorating an entire house like this?” He asked, looking around the room.

“You mean you haven’t?” Christine teased.

Stephen rolled his eyes. “I can barely stand to look at myself for five minutes, this is like hell on earth. Don’t give Ant any ideas about redecorating our apartment, Christine.”

“She doesn’t need to, I wouldn’t do it,” Anthony replied. “Even I don’t need to see this much of myself.”

Christine laughed at their antics before chasing after Hope and giving them a moment alone. There weren’t many other people around, so Stephen had an unobstructed view of several of his reflections checking their phones.

Anthony was still standing beside him, taking everything in. “You okay?”

Stephen (and all of his clones) nodded. “Yeah, I guess. Still no updates though.”

I can’t even be honest with him. I can barely be honest with myself at this point.

“I’m sorry Steph.”

“It’s okay! I’m probably more anxious than I need to be, it’s really fine.”

Anthony frowned slightly but didn’t push him. “I feel like there should be at least one control variable, just a basic full body mirror at the beginning and/or end of these things.”

“There usually is at the end,” Stephen replied. “At least I think. It’s like when you leave home and take another glance at yourself to make sure you look decent. You’re the one who can, and you do, spend five minutes in front of any mirror, so—”

“That’s absolutely not true and you know it. The longest I’ve looked at myself in the front hallway mirror specifically is three minutes tops”

Stephen rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say, babe.”

They continued their walk around the winding hallways, coming to a stop at a standard mirror just in front of the exits.

Christine and Hope were chattering outside, looking at a map of the fairground that they’d found somewhere (Stephen hadn’t a clue where, seeing as he wasn’t paying attention at the time).

“We look cute,” Anthony remarked.

“You do, I don’t,” Stephen said.

“No, we both do!” Anthony’s stubbornness was coming out to play, it seemed. “I mean I know you only keep me around because I’m adorable, but I’m probably the luckiest guy in the world to be yours.”

Stephen blushed and looked at his shoes. “Yeah, I’m only with you because you’re hot and not at all because you’re my best friend who I happen to be madly in love with.”

“Aww.” Anthony smiled and squeezed Stephen’s hand, leaning up to kiss his cheek. “I love you too, you asshole.”

Stephen looked up, staring at their reflections and different expressions. His smile was tired and clearly forced, while Anthony’s was genuine and bright. He couldn’t help but sigh, disappointed in himself for not matching his boyfriend’s energy.

“You sure you’re okay?” Anthony asked.

“I’m trying to be,” Stephen replied. “That’s the best answer I have, and it may not seem like I’m trying very hard, but I am.”

“I know. Stress and anxiety don’t just go away when you ignore them, unfortunately,” Anthony reminded him. “Attention whores that they are.”

Stephen laughed, surprised as always by Anthony’s sudden dry delivery and humor. “I feel like you’re what ‘sugar and spice and everything nice’ means, you can go from sweet and calming to making me laugh within the same breath.” He shuffled forward a bit, dropping his head on Anthony’s shoulder.

“Well I don’t like the implication that I’m nice,” Anthony huffed jokingly.

“I didn’t really imply it, I’m telling you that you’re nice,” Stephen replied.

Anthony just rolled his eyes. “That’s your opinion.”

“I wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true, you know I don’t like lying,” Stephen said.

Except for the fact that I’m so in denial about Mom not calling that I actually am lying to Anthony. He doesn’t deserve that.

Anthony just shrugged as Stephen looked up at him again. “So when you said that I’m not good at carnival games, that was—”

“That was me trying to encourage you, and while you clearly needed it I don’t think it helped,” Stephen quipped.

“Rude but true. At least there weren’t a lot of people—”

“Move!” A boisterous group of children who couldn’t be older than 13 ran past, shoving past them on their way to the door.

Stephen stumbled and fell back against Anthony, which caused one of the group to say something particularly rude.

Anthony glared at the instigator. “What?”

“Don’t, it’s not worth it,” Stephen said.

The same kid laughed, having the audacity to repeat himself before catching up with the rest of the bullies.

“I don’t know where someone who looks like they’re barely eleven years old learns to talk like that, but they can fuck right off,” Anthony said.

“You’re right. Honestly I would be more upset if worse things hadn’t happened today, but it’s all relative,” Stephen replied. “I’ll tell you about it later, we should go find Hope and Christine.”

Anthony nodded, a scowl still on his face when they found and rejoined their friends.

“Are you self-obsessed idiots done looking at yourselves?” Christine teased.

“You literally heard me say I can’t stand looking at my reflection for more than five minutes. We were just talking,” Stephen said.

“Why do people have to be so goddamn ignorant?” Anthony muttered, kicking the dirt in front of him.

“What happened?” Hope asked.

“Really nothing, just some middle schoolers being stupid,” Stephen replied. “It’s not a big deal. What are we thinking about doing now?”

“I want a snack, I think,” Christine said. “Does anyone want cotton candy?”

“We should get cotton candy!”

Donna had boundless energy, a zest for life, and a fun-loving mischief about her. She ran into each day like it was a new adventure, sometimes reckless but always under the protective watch of her brothers.

“If that’s what you want, Donna, I’ll buy you some.”

“What about me?”

Victor didn’t come into the world with a smartass attitude, but he quickly adopted some of Stephen’s mannerisms. He learned how to assert himself and how to be fair, which meant he knew when and how to argue on his own behalf.

“Of course Vic, I’ll get you some too.”

“I want the bubblegum flavor!”

It was the end of summer, and the Strange family was spending an afternoon at the zoo. Donna loved animals more than almost anything in the world, and all she’d wanted was to spend the day with her family sharing random animal facts and learning as much as she could. Stephen was the one to plan the excursion, the trip occurring the day after he returned from California. He was visiting Anthony for just under two (2) weeks then, that summer their last as ‘just friends.’

Donna was elated when Stephen came home, her little face lighting up when he announced the family outing.

Outing was an interesting choice of words.

That day trip was the last time the Strange family was whole. That day was the last day Stephen was worth something in his mom’s eyes, the last time he read his sister a bedtime story after pretending that he didn’t want to. All Stephen did was plan a surprise afternoon for Donna and buy her cotton candy, and she was the happiest he’d ever seen her. It was, in the most tragic sense, the perfect last day. She drowned in the lake the next morning, and Stephen felt like he lost control of his life. Desperate to take it back, and against his better judgement, he came out a few days later. He hoped his mom would be supportive, understanding, and maybe even encouraging, but he was as good as disowned by her that day.

“Hey… Earth to Steph.” Anthony softly caressed his face. “Stephen?”

He snapped out of his flashback, probably looking like a deer in the headlights when his eyes met Anthony’s. “Sorry.”

“I thought you were gonna pass out for a minute,” Anthony said.

“I’m good. I just zoned out,” Stephen replied. “It’s not even motion sickness, I genuinely stopped listening to whatever you guys were talking about.”

“So you didn’t hear me ask if any of you wanted cotton candy?” Christine asked.

“That I did hear.” Stephen heard the sudden brittleness in his voice and steeled himself, subconsciously reaching for Anthony’s hand.

“I forgot you don’t like sweets that much, sorry man,” Christine replied.

“That isn’t the problem,” Stephen said. “And that’s not even true.”

Christine just shrugged. “Alright.”

Stephen sighed, ignoring the confused look Christine gave him and running his free hand through his hair. He sighed again. “Sorry Christine.”

“You’re forgiven, Stephen. It’s fine, and sometimes you just have a bad day,” Christine replied. “It’s not like I’ve never gone off on you before.”

“I wouldn’t call that going off, I’ve used all of my self restraint today,” Stephen said. “But thanks.”

He sighed for the third time and leaned against Anthony’s shoulder.

“You okay?” Anthony asked gently.

Stephen looked at his phone again. “Still no updates.”

Anthony frowned, concern and understanding written all over his face. “That’s shitty.”

“You’re right about that,” Stephen replied, laughing despite himself at how direct Anthony’s delivery was. “Rollercoaster?”

“Damnit, I thought I was enough of a thrill for you,” Anthony teased.

Stephen rolled his eyes. “You are, you dumbass. I just thought it’d be fun.”

“I’m not disagreeing! I’m in,” Anthony replied.

“The line isn’t too long, y’all should go now,” Hope said. “We’re getting popcorn, and then we can ride the teacups again before leaving if you guys want?”

“Sure,” Anthony said.

Stephen just nodded. He’d had a good time, but honestly just wanted to go home and pretend like today didn’t happen.

“We can hold your shit too, if you want,” Christine offered.

“Thank you for not bringing up the Great Adventure mishap,” Anthony replied, handing Christine his bag.

“Not sure if I’d call forgetting to take off your sunglasses a mishap,” Stephen quipped, also handing over his bag.

Maybe I’ll get lucky and she’ll have called by the time we’re back.

If I asked a magic 8 ball what the chances were of that happening, I think it’d tell me to go fuck myself.

“What would you call it, then?” Anthony asked indignantly.

“Unfortunate, and a consequence of you not listening to me when I said not to wear them,” Stephen replied.

“You’re both wrong, that’s just Ant’s smooth brain energy hard at work,” Hope said.

Anthony rolled his eyes. “I’m sorry that wearing sunglasses is such a big part of my personal brand! Whatever, see you two in a bit!”

Hope and Christine probably rolled their eyes as Stephen and Anthony went on their way, but all in good fun.

Stephen was starting to feel a little better while they queued for the rollercoaster. He’d always liked them and they never made him dizzy which really helped. Coasters were sort of like a spontaneous thought process in his mind. There were digressions, breakthroughs and thoughts that were best left alone, and something to look forward to at every corner. Stephen felt like there was less time for self loathing on a rollercoaster, less time to hone in on certain things while he was moving so fast. He definitely preferred rollercoasters to tilt-a-whirl type things, even though he didn’t hate the spinning teacup ride they ended the night with. There was just more sitting still involved somehow, which meant more opportunities for self loathing. The pattern of the ride mirrored the circular thought process he slipped into, almost like he was cycling through stages of grief. Stephen wasn’t sure if he was angrier with Beverly for how she treated him or with himself for hoping she’d call, and he hadn’t even made it out of the denial stage. To his expected disappointment, there were no calls from his mom when he checked his phone on the ride home.

I don’t know what I expected.

I keep telling myself that I’m dead to her and it doesn’t seem to sink in.

I know it’s true, and all of this might hurt less if I just accept that.

Christine and Hope were bickering about something in the front of their car, and Stephen didn’t have a clue what it was. He’d tuned them out again, despondently resting his head on Anthony’s shoulder as Christine navigated the traffic.

“Ant?” Stephen’s voice was hushed and straining as he tried not to cry.

Anthony hummed. “That’s me.”

Stephen smiled sadly. “She’s not going to call, Anthony.”

“The night is still—”

“No! No, I mean she’s… I’ll tell you when we get home.” Stephen was trembling now, overwhelmed with everything that he was feeling.

“Okay,” Anthony murmured, softly kissing his head. His heart broke as Stephen started crying into his shoulder. “I love you.”

Stephen barely fought back a sob. Sometimes he needed reminders that people loved and cared about him, but he was always ashamed to ask. He was getting slowly better at asking for affection, but verbal reassurance was a completely separate beast. When it came to dealing with his mother, he needed to hear that he was loved and valued for who he was to try and combat the self loathing that followed their conversations. He needed help getting his confidence and self assurance back. He didn’t like to be so vulnerable, but Stephen couldn’t deny that sometimes he just wanted to feel loved and safe. Anthony, affectionate and protective and caring and sweet, always knew when Stephen needed these loving affirmations and always provided them. “I love you too.”

“It’s okay. We’ll be home soon, mia vita,” Anthony soothed. He reached for one of Stephen’s hands, holding it in both of his own. “Ti amo con tutto ciò che sono e con tutto ciò che sarò.”

He loves me…

++++

There was always something sweet about coming home to a loud house. The noise could be jarring, a pleasant consequence of 5 relatively loud friends living together, but it served as a welcoming of sorts. Today it was even louder when Stephen and Anthony got home, thanks mostly to an argument between Sam and Wong. Standing between them, Bruce was acting like a moderator of sorts.

“The lovebirds are back!” Wong announced, interrupting what looked like a heated rebuttal from Sam. “How was the carnival?”

“It was good! I tried to win one of those balloon dart games,” Anthony replied.

“Keyword is ‘tried,’ guys,” Stephen added.

“I was too busy thinking about what prize to win since I wanted to give Steph something cute, but it didn’t really go to plan,” Anthony said.

“Next time babe, I believe in you!” Stephen cheered as brightly as he could. He was tired of faking a smile, tired of hoping his mom would come around.

She’s never going to change her mind.

“Maybe we should’ve gone tonight, I feel like it’s going to be more crowded tomorrow,” Sam said.

“I think it depends on when you go,” Anthony replied. “Speaking of going places, you know your man dragged me to Panera with him earlier.”

“I told you! Nothing comes between Bucky and a bread bowl,” Sam said, rolling his eyes. “What time do you think is the best to go tomorrow night?”

Stephen shrugged. “Probably 8? I don’t know. Most of the lines move relatively fast so you should be fine.”

“Don’t worry Sam, if the grumpiest boy on the Eastern seaboard says you’ll be fine, you’ll definitely be good,” Wong teased.

“That’s rich coming from you.” Stephen turned on his heel and left, retreating to the comfort of his bedroom.

“Did I upset him?” Wong asked, mostly addressing Anthony. “I didn’t mean to.”

“Something is bothering him,” Anthony replied. It wasn’t his business to go into detail, nor was he the gatekeeper of what problems Stephen chose to share with their friends. “He should be okay, but I’m gonna go keep him company.”

Anthony headed for his bedroom, bringing the conversation to a halt. Stephen had closed the door, which wasn’t unusual but Anthony still didn’t want to just open it in case Stephen wanted to be completely alone.

He knocked quietly yet audibly to avoid startling Stephen. “Hey, it’s just me. Can I come in?”

“Yeah, ‘course,” Stephen mumbled. He was curled up on their bed, trembling as he looked up at the ceiling.

It was warm in their room as per usual, so Anthony knew Stephen wasn’t shivering from cold.

Stephen felt the bed dip as his boyfriend sat beside him, and he closed his eyes as Anthony began to gently massage his scalp.

“Wong and Christine are probably angry with me,” Stephen said after a while.

“Wong didn’t mean to upset you,” Anthony replied. “Neither did Christine. And I think they understand that you’re not purposefully antagonizing them.”

Stephen sat up, the intense mix of emotion in eyes burning a hole in the ceiling as he leaned against the headboard and a pile of throw pillows.

Anthony shifted just enough to rest his head on Stephen’s shoulder, silently reminding him that he wasn’t alone. He offered one of his hands, Stephen holding it gently. He drew figure eights on Anthony’s upturned palm as he thought, the motion soothing as he started talking.

“Before I came home today, when I went to Starbucks, I got a call from my dad,” Stephen began. “Mom changed the plan for today, he said. I don’t know what she did specifically but all that matters is that she rearranged the family call so I couldn’t join. That was her way of telling me she’s mad at me without having to burden herself by speaking with me.”

Anthony shifted to straddle him, comfortingly resting his hands on Stephen’s arms. Stephen didn’t meet his concerned gaze.“I’m sorry.”

“It gets worse. When I said earlier that I’ve dealt with worse things today than some homophobic children, all of this is what I mean.” Stephen was still staring upwards, as if their ceiling had an answer he didn’t. “I got to talk to Vic, which was most important to me. We didn’t talk for very long since I was planning on going to my next class at that point, but I got to wish him a happy birthday and apologize for not being able to join the call. He wasn’t upset with me, he understood and we left things on the same good terms. I didn’t tell him why I couldn’t join, but I’m sure he knows. I’m sure he’s figured out why Mom and I don’t talk, he knows enough of the story to figure it out.”

He was crying now, all of his emotions boiling over. He was livid, devastated, and afraid for some reason, hiding his face in his hands.

Anthony was silent, taking both of Stephen’s hands and letting him cry until he’d somewhat calmed down.

“Sorry,” Stephen mumbled. He rested their joined hands in his lap and turned his teary gaze on Anthony. “I've not even finished the story and I’m already a mess.”

“It’s okay Steph, you don’t have to be.” Anthony brushed a few stray tears off Stephen’s face.

Stephen sighed. “I knew by the time I got home that she wasn’t going to call me. That’s why I came back, honestly. I didn’t want to sit through my classes thinking about it, thinking about how I’m… thinking about how she wouldn’t call. I tried to make myself tell you earlier, but I can barely come to terms with all of this in my own head. I wasn’t trying to lie to you when you said she might call, I promise. I was just holding onto the smallest wisp of hope that maybe she’d change her mind.”

“I don’t feel like you lied to me,” Anthony replied, one of his hands again finding its way to playing with Stephen’s hair. “I’m sorry I was so insistent in saying she’d call. I was trying to reassure you.”

“I know,” Stephen said. “It helped a little, especially since I was trying to convince myself that she’d end up calling. But she never did, Anthony, and she won’t. Dad said she told him directly that she wasn’t going to talk to me, so why am I such a fool and still hoping she’ll come around? I’m dead to her and I should be able to understand that!”

“I imagine you’re trying to make yourself accept it so you can move on, right?” Anthony asked.

Stephen nodded frantically, his eyes shut tight as he began to cry again. “I know that’s not the best way to deal with things, but I don’t know what to do. I don’t expect her to accept me anytime soon, and I know my family isn’t going to ever feel whole again. But I ruined Victor’s birthday by not showing up for him with the rest of the family! I would’ve joined the call if she wasn’t mad at me, and I didn’t even fucking do anything!”

Stephen was crying more out of anger than sadness, resting his head on Anthony’s shoulder and subconsciously pinching his forearm.

Anthony hugged him, both to reassure Stephen and to keep him from hurting himself in anger. “You haven’t failed him. You did what you could and made the best out of an awful, fucked up situation.”

Stephen just nodded, hearing Anthony’s message but not fully listening “Speaking of fucked up, and this is actually probably the thing I’m most upset about, you know my cousin Maxwell?”

"Yeah.”

“He took a page out of my mom’s book and outed me to my aunt.”

“Jesus Christ.” Now Anthony looked as angry as Stephen felt, a storm brewing in his eyes.

“I’m lucky because my aunt Claudia is great, and she’s really accepting but that obviously pissed my mom off so now she’s mad at her sister and at me,” Stephen said.

“That’s good about your aunt, but why the fuck would your cousin do that?” Anthony asked.

“He might have thought she already knew, I don’t know. It’s not okay that he did it, but it’s a relief to know that at least she took it well. I was worried she’d make fun of me since she always likes to prank and make me the butt of the joke, and even that would be fine compared to my mom’s response,” Stephen replied. “If I got over this faster I wouldn’t have taken all the fun out of tonight.”

“Hey, stop that,” Anthony murmured. “You didn’t! I like being around you no matter what mood you’re in, and I’m always here for you. That includes when things aren’t going well, by the way. My love for you isn’t conditional.”

Stephen looked up enough just to see Anthony’s face. “Do you think she’s ever going to come around? And not just today, but in general?”

“I hope so,” Anthony replied. “You don’t deserve to deal with this from her, or from anyone but least of all your own mother, and I hope she understands that sooner rather than later. But I can’t say with certainty what she’s going to do.”

“I just want today to be over,” Stephen said with a sigh. “I mean I did have fun tonight, but spending the entire day attached to my phone and trying to ignore what I already know wasn’t really nice.”

Anthony nodded. “Why don’t we get ready for bed then? We can put it all behind us and start over tomorrow.”

“That sounds good,” Stephen whispered. “I know I won’t ever forget this, but just for now I want to set it aside.”

++++

The day should’ve ended there, with slight banter and falling into bed with the person Stephen loved most in the world. But of course it didn’t, of course the powers that controlled his life had to have the last laugh. He’d just closed his eyes and was starting to slip away, content as Anthony pulled up one of their nighttime playlists and hummed along to whatever song was playing. Stephen was the little spoon tonight, feeling loved and secure and safe in the dark of their bedroom and Anthony’s arms. He was finally starting to relax, and then the phone rang.

He didn’t expect it and was annoyed when he heard the first notes of his ringtone, but he answered anyway thinking it was one of their friends. Thor especially had a tendency to call people earlier in the morning or later at night. “Hello?”

Despite having called him, the person on the other end of the line responded with a hasty “I must’ve misdialed. Don’t call back.”

Oh my god.

The cold, familiar voice ringing out over the speakerphone made Stephen’s heart stop.

SHE CALLED!

“No Mom, wait! I didn’t think you were going to call.”

“I don’t consider you my son, I don’t know why you keep calling me your mother,” Beverly replied. “I told you, I misdialed. I wouldn’t go out of my way to speak with you, not after you continuously cast shame onto my family.”

“Not even today? On Victor’s birthday?” Stephen asked.

Beverly scoffed. “No, and don’t even say his name! You and Victor aren’t brothers anymore, you decided that for yourself, and I’ll not have any outside influences corrupting my only son!” She hung up before Stephen could defend himself, the dial tone uncomfortably loud.

Stephen wasn’t sure what to do. A sharp, stabbing numbness seized his body and he curled in on himself to escape the onslaught of emotion hanging over his head. He turned onto his other side, burying his head in Anthony’s chest and failing to keep himself from crying.

“None of what she told you is true,” Anthony said. “Not a damn thing. You—”

Stephen shook his head. “Anthony, don't talk. Please, I’m sorry, I love you and I love your voice but I can’t… it’s too much…”

Anthony shushed him softly, carding his hand through Stephen’s hair again. He wanted to say something, to tell Stephen that he didn’t have to apologize, but that wouldn’t do any good. Instead, he just hugged Stephen tighter and gave him a soft kiss. Sometimes love was best conveyed in actions.

This is just like when I left after the funeral, when we hid from the outside world together. No one makes me feel at home the way Anthony does.

Stephen was too used to crying in Anthony’s arms because of things his mother… because of things Beverly told him. He knew he could run and hide from this or any problem with Anthony, and he’d always be safe and accepted and home. The thought was comforting, especially to the part of Stephen’s mind that was loath and afraid to confront the truth.

Eventually I’m going to have to process this fully and give myself the time to do it. I know myself, and I’m not going to change for anyone. Why should I have to?

Stephen shifted closer to Anthony, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend. He rested his head on Anthony’s shoulder, the tiniest smile on his face.

How does he already have bedhead? Adorable.

Despite saying that he wasn’t tired, Anthony was already falling asleep. “Need anything?”

Stephen shook his head and softly kissed Anthony’s cheek. “I’ll be fine. I’m just as tired as you, if not more.”

“Doubtful.”

“I’m going to ignore the fact that you just scoffed at me.”

“I didn’t!”

Stephen rolled his eyes and leaned up to kiss Anthony’s cheek. “I love you. Thank you.”

“I didn’t do anything, really, and I love you too,” Anthony replied with a yawn.

“You’ve done more for me than you realize, and I think you know it,” Stephen murmured.

Already falling asleep, Anthony didn’t respond verbally. He just hugged Stephen closer, again saying much more than words ever could.

tags: @stark-strange-love2 @taruyison @kitkatfat15 @katninjagirl97 @spookywizardboy @ocforeverything @ironstrange-chaos @chocopiggy @lokis-leah @majesticnerdynerd @maya-custodios-dionach @thespacecryptid @kiwidino @doctorstephenvincentstarkstrange

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softyoongiionly · 4 years

Text

🧊lo-fi hip hop🧊

You have a terrible day and, Yoongi comes to the rescue.

In more ways than one...

Genre: Fluff, Smut (18+ only plz)

Word Count:

Warnings: a wee bit of angst but, not a TON, Yoongi :o), smut and explicit language.

A/N: Hiiiiii I missed you I love you please enjoy! This is unedited for now.

Also, yes this is technically a FnD drabble but, it can be read as a stand alone. HOWWeevvverrr if you want to read the fic this belongs to,

subscribe here x

You are having the worst day.

Like, the kind of day where you stub your pinky toe on the corner of the table, spill your coffee all over yourself and, miss your train to class kind of day.

It’s the kind of day where all you want to do is crawl beneath the covers and, cry for approximately 18 hours straight.

Just the girly things.

But given the fact that you’re 3 weeks away from graduation and, you can’t do that.

You catch a taxi to your classes, walk off the soreness in your foot and, change out of your coffee stained shirt.

The day drags on endlessly and, you feel yourself getting overwhelmed at things that would normally roll off your shoulders.

On the subway ride home, you’re practically holding back tears as you try to reign in all the emotions you’re dealing with.

You could call Jimin.

You know he’d be here for you in a heartbeat.

You could text your two other best friends and, you know that they’d cheer you up with various memes and tik toks.

But, there is only one person you want to call.

There is only one person, in this moment, who’d be able to put a proper smile on your face.

Yoongi.

The only problem is: your boyfriend is also dealing with his own mountain of stress.

He’s been in the studio since Monday mastering his final project.

You’ve barely heard from him.

You haven’t seen each other since the day after Jimin’s showcase and, that was nearly a week ago.

You miss him.

A lot.

Yoongi has a way of making everything smaller.

He takes life in piece by piece and, with a perspective that is so uniquely him, he seems to know the right thing to do.

It’s almost as if it’s instinctual.

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t need him right now.

You needed his gentle words of encouragement, the lullaby of his voice, the tenderness behind his touch…

There is a bit of embarrassment that washes over you.

You’ve never been the one to need anyone.

You value the people in your life of course but, you’ve never felt like this before.

Sitting on your couch, there is strong battle waging inside your head.

To call or not to call.

He is your boyfriend so, you know he’d be there for you.

But you don’t want to bother him.

You know how much stress his under and, you don’t want to add to that.

But fuck, today is rough.

Sometimes you just need your mans.

You decide to bite the bullet and call him.

The persistent ringing on the other end of the line is causing a bit of anxiety to knock against your chest.

What if he’s too busy?

What if he thinks you’re being dramatic?

You know these concerns are unreasonable; Yoongi is the kindest person alive.

But, there is still a level of apprehension regarding asking others for help.

“Hey, I’m sorry I haven’t texted back today, I should be almost done.”

His voice soothes you immediately.

“Uh no- no it’s ok. I just um…” You trail off, trying to contain the instability in your voice but you’re too late.

He’s already heard it.

“Yah is everything good? Are you alright?”

“Y-yeah I just- I just wanted to check in.”

“You don’t sound alright. What’s going on jagi?”

His concern chisels away at the bit of resolve you have left and, rather than lie to him, you decide to be honest.

“I’m just not having a good day and-“ Your voice breaks and Yoongi can feel his chest clenching at the sound, “I just wanted to say hi.”

“Are you home right now?”

You nod despite his inability to see you, “Yeah I just got in. I’m sorry to bother you in the studio-“

“Hey you’re never bothering me, don’t worry about that. Are you up for seeing anyone or do you just want to talk?”

Yoongi is amazing this way.

He never assumes.

He always asks what you’re comfortable with.

He knows that there are times when sadness is left alone and, there are times when sadness needs a visitor.

“I don’t want to interrupt you in the studio. I just miss you…”

Yoongi bites his lip on the other end of the line.

He wishes you knew how important you were to him.

He wishes you knew that he’d drop anything for you.

“I’ll come over ok? I miss you too. It’s been a long week huh?”

You want to protest, you really do…

The sound of his voice is too much to resist though and, you find yourself resigning to his plans to come see you.

“Yeah it has. Are you sure you can? I don’t want to stop you from working.”

Yoongi can hear the tension in your voice and, right now all he wants to do is bring the light back into it.

“You are more important than anything I’m doing here.” You can already hear him grabbing his things and, for the first time today you feel a smile coming across your face, “I’ll bring dinner too, are you craving anything?”

Jesus, you really love this man.

“Dumplings.”

Your reply is paired with a light giggle and, Yoongi’s rickety laughter continues the process of lightening your mood.

“Why did I even ask? Alright, I’ll grab those and then I’ll be right there ok?”

“Ok, thank you…I love you.”

The words are still so new between the two of you and, they cause a giant gummy smile to erupt on Yoongi’s face.

“I love you too jagiya.”

Just like that, with a few simple words, your bad day is suddenly much brighter.

After changing into more comfortable clothes, you tidy up a bit around your apartment to prepare for Yoongi’s arrival.

He doesn’t take long to get to you and, when there is a knock at your front door, you nearly trip as you run towards the sound.

Yoongi is standing in the doorway with a takeout bag in his hand, looking like the most beautiful man on planet earth.

He’s in a black v neck and, gray sweat pants and, his black hair is a fluffy mess atop his head suggesting that he had recently showered.

He smiles at you with a knowing look in his eyes but, before he is able to stay anything, you wrap your arms around his waist and, bury your face in his chest.

“Hi.” He murmurs, wrapping his free arm around you, kissing the top of your head. “Rough day hm?”

All you do is nod, taking in the clean scent of his cologne.

A fond smile is immediately on his lips as he too, is comforted by your presence.

Yoongi makes his way into your apartment whilst he still holds onto you, setting the food on the counter so he can hug you properly.

In his arms, you peek up at him and, one sight of his pouty lips is enough for you to kiss him.

It’s the not kiss Yoongi expects as figured you’d be pretty emotional when he got to you but, the way you’re working his lips makes his knees weak.

You didn’t expect it either but, you couldn’t help yourself.

Sliding your hands up his back, you tangle your fingers into the loose strands at the base of his neck, your lips moving slightly more urgently against his.

“Hey-“ Yoongi doesn’t want to stop you, he really doesn’t but, he wants to make sure you’re ok before you go any further. “Are you ok?”

He smooths a thumb over your swollen lips, his eyes slightly lulled from the effect your kiss has on him, “What do you need?”

His questions have multiple meanings and, you wish you had clearer answers for him but all you can muster is, “I need you.”

A small smirk comes across his lips as he tilts your chin up towards him, “I’m right here jagi.”

You nod and, move to kiss him again before he brings you to a gentle stop, placing a kiss on cheek, “Hey…lets slow down ok? I wanna make sure you’re alright before we do anything…”

Now listen…

The next thing you’re about to do is a little unreasonable.

It’s a little ridiculous...

It’s a little silly.

But, you’re only human.

For whatever reason, Yoongi wanting to hold off on sex makes the tears congregate back to your eyes.

“Oh- Oh you’re right I’m sorry. I’m sorry I should have asked...” You sniffle, avoiding his gaze and, stepping away from him.

The sting of embarrassment heats up your cheeks and, before he has a chance to say anything, you nod to the food on the counter, “Thank you uh- thank you for bringing the food. How much do I-?” The emotion squeezes at the tone of your voice until it’s clearly noticeable that you’re about to cry.

“Whoa hey- hey…what’s wrong?” Yoongi rushes over to you, place his hands on your upper arms, “Jagi…look at me.”

You’re frozen in the middle of your kitchen, your gaze fixed firmly on a chewed up hair-tie courtesy of Marzipan.

“I’m ok.” You insist despite the tears filling your eye sockets, “I’m sorry I jumped on you like that.”

“You have tears in your eyes, you’re not fine.” He remarks sagely, tilting his head to get you to look at him “Come here…”

He pulls you back into his arms despite the stiffness in your body before he speaks up again, “Did you just apologize for kissing me?”

“I just-“ You sniffle, your chest heaving with the onslaught of emotion, “I can’t do anything right. I spilled coffee all over myself this morning, I stubbed my toe, I missed my train, I kept getting questions wrong in the lecture, I am freaking out about this deadline this Tuesday and, then…and then…” You’re trying to speak through your tears but, it’s becoming a jumbled mess, “I can’t even turn my boyfriend on without making it weird and, I interrupted your studio time and, I’m just a mess- I’m sorry.”

Yoongi wants to tell you how wrong you are, he wants to slough away all of your tension but, for the moment, he lets you cry into his chest.

He holds you in the middle of the kitchen floor, pressing kisses into your forehead as the two of you sway gently from side to side.

“Let’s go lay down…”

The tenderness in his voice is impossible to refuse and, all you can do is let him lead you to your bedroom, abandoning the food on the countertop.

Yoongi is an expert at reheating leftovers as he often forgets to finish all of his food.

The covers are pulled back despite the fact that you’re still clinging to him but, he doesn’t miss a beat as he pulls you underneath your duvet, insuring that you don’t move far from him.

“I got you, I hear you…” He whispers into the near darkness of your bedroom, his words punctuated with more kisses.

“I’m sorry…”

It’s a terrible habit of yours, to apologize when you’re sad, but it’s a habit none the less.

“Stop apologizing, you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re just having a bad day baby…”

Yoongi reserves terms of endearment for when he really means them. Sure, they slip out during heated sessions in the bedroom but, they always have a meaning and, they are never used as just another name to call you.

“I’ve read your paper yeah? It’s full of so much passion and, research. They are going to want to publish it in an undergrad journal of some kind. You have so a way with words, it’s incredible. I know it’s easy to get swept up in the pressure and, that’s ok. Just try and remember that you’ve done your best and, that’s all you can do.” His hand combs through your hair gently, stopping at any snags along the way and, moving to a new spot as he continues, “You don’t ever have to be sorry for having a bad day. I’m not just around for the good days…”

Shifting beneath your duvet, you peer up at him with a hopeless glance, “I just hate feeling this way, I feel weak.”

Yoongi’s pretty mouth curves up into a fond smile as he brushes his thumb over your cheek, “You’re weak for having a bad day?”

“I mean…no. I guess not, I just feel weak for-“ You cut yourself off as your teeth take their place on your bottom lip, “for feeling like I needed you. I knew that nothing else would have made me feel better and, I guess I’ve never been in that position before. It freaks me out a little bit.”

Yoongi’s wise eyes follow along with your words, his smile lingering all the while, “Terrifying isn’t it?”

You groan, burying your face into his neck, causing rickety laughter to leave his lips as he holds you tighter to his chest.

“I…hate….feelings.” You grumble against his skin, placing a few timid kisses there.

Yoongi continues laughing, his capable fingers brushing against the exposed skin on your back.

“I felt the same way that night at my studio. I knew there was no one else I wanted to see.” Yoongi murmurs, the tone of his voice soothing you, “I hated that I was right. You made me feel so much better. I didn’t want you to leave the next day even though I was going to see you that night. Trust me, I understand how scary it can be to need someone but, I know for a fact you didn’t think I was weak for needing you that night. So, I don’t think you should apply different standards for yourself. That isn’t fair.”

As expected, Yoongi provides the exact support you need.

He’s right.

There is no weakness in being vulnerable.

There is no weakness in having a bad day.

“You’re smart.” You note and, a smile breaks across your mouth as Yoongi laughs again.

It’s one of your favorite sounds.

“So are you.” He kisses the top of your head, his hands sliding down to your hips, squeezing at them gently, “it’s not always easy to see the good in yourself but, keep trying ok?”

A response from you comes in the form of a nod whilst warmth flutters into your heart.

It’s the kind of warmth only Yoongi can provide and, it makes you want to kiss him until the early hours of the morning.

It’s a possibility right?

You know he should probably go back to the studio after dinner.

Yoongi maneuvers the two of you during your contemplation so that he’s in a position to connect his lips to yours.

He’s so gentle.

He kisses your bottom lip first, lingering for a moment before proceeding to your top lip.

Yoongi’s hooded eyes remain partially open, staring into your own as he repeats the motions on your lips over and over again.

You let him, enjoying the plushness of his mouth, enjoying the way he wets your lips.

Finally though, it becomes too much and your hand reaches up to brush at the tender skin of his cheek before pulling him closer to you.

Yoongi kisses you slowly, as he usually does but, you can feel the emotion behind it.

The sun informs you of its dwindling position in the sky as the light in your room grows dimmer and dimmer.

The traffic outside your window is a distant sound compared to the soft increase in breath coming from your boyfriend.

“I love kissing you.” He whispers, suckling at your bottom lip.

You smile into his mouth, reconnecting your lips fully before responding, “I love you.”

His gums are out then, beaming brightly at your sudden proclamation.

Yoongi swears he could listen to you saying those three words a million times and, he’d never get tired of it.

“Don’t try to one up me…” He chuckles, the sound rumbling deep within his chest as he tilts your chin up towards him with one finger, “I love you too.”

It’s your turn to grin now, your eyes likely staring up at him as if he were the greatest gift in the world.

Because, you know, he is.

“Is your appetite back? I can throw those dumplings on the stove really quick if you want.” He offers, his finger still hooked underneath your chin.

Although it’s a tempting offer, it surprises you a bit and you can’t help but pout up at him.

“Yah what’s that face for?”

“We’ve been making out for like 10 minutes, how are you thinking about food right now?”

Your tone isn’t accusatory as normally something like this wouldn’t phase you but, you’re a bit fragile today and, unfortunately your insecurities tend to pop out during times like these.

Yoongi still remains endeared beneath your inquiry, a smirk at the corner of his mouth, “I’m thinking about your needs right now. If I was thinking about myself I’d probably be kissing my way up your thighs right now…”

His answer is surprising and it’s enough to send arousal flooding to your core.

You’re extra sensitive today and desperate for relief that you know Yoongi is more than capable of providing.

“I don’t need food…” You grumble, trying to hide the way he affects you and, Yoongi is quick to kiss the pout of your lips, snickering as he does.

“No? What do you need then?”

You’re really receptive to his touch now as he slides his hands back down to your hips.

He notices and, your reaction causes his dick to twitch in the confines of his sweats.

“You…” You murmur against his lips, parting your legs subconsciously, “I know you probably have to go back soon but-“

With a furrowed brow, Yoongi moves from your lips, “Go back where?”

“To the studio.”

Yoongi shakes his head, pecking your lips twice in a row, “I’m not going anywhere. I told you, you’re important than anything in the studio.”

Biting your lip, you nod, sliding your hands up his nimble arms and resting them on his shoulders, “Can you stay the night?”

A soft smile is on his lips then, “Of course…” He whispers, before nodding to the pillows, “Now lay down for me…”

As you’re settling back against the bed, Yoongi is up on his knees shifting so he can lay between your legs.

Before he does though, he smirks shamelessly looking over his shoulder towards your window, “Alexa, play Yoongi’s lo-fi mix…”

Your mouth parts in shock before a giggle rushes past your lips, “When did you have time to do that???”

He chuckles as the music starts flooding in through the speakers, “I paired my phone with it when I set it up for you. It auto-connects whenever I come over…”

You roll your eyes, giggling still, “I should have known- did you make a sex playlist?”

He blushes at your accusation but, he doesn’t immediately deny it as he slowly parts your thighs, “Stop asking so many questions.” He smirks again as he hears your laughter, feeling warm at the sound of it, “Close your eyes…”

As your giggling fades, you oblige and allowing your eyes to flutter shut.

The low hum of the music fills you with a sense of relaxation despite the quickening of heartbeat.

Yoongi runs his hands gently up your legs, parting them further as he allows his finger tips to tease against the sensitive skin of your inner thighs.

His motions cause goosebumps to erupt beneath his touch and, he can’t help but smile to himself at your reaction.

It’s satisfying to know he affects you this way.

Although, Yoongi still believes it’s incomparable to the way you affect him.

Silence settles between the two of you for the moment as the smooth ambience of the music dances around the room.

Yoongi continues teasing over your skin; trace shapes over your hips, fluttering his fingers dangerously close to the ache between your legs but, he pulls away to push your t-shirt up your body, revealing your breasts to him.

You can’t see his reaction to you but, you can hear him inhale shakily at the sight of you.

“So beautiful...” He murmurs in Korean, the sound of his voice sending a shiver up your spine.

A smile presents itself as you recognize the word, “You said beautiful...”

Yoongi returns your smile at your pride, nodding as he brushes his fingers over your nipples.

“Hmm so you have been studying...” He observes and, you can feel his breath against your skin as he leans down to press a kiss between your breasts.

You nudge him with your knee, keeping your eyes shut despite your urge to look at him, “Shut up.”

He snickers before placing lingering kisses down the length of your torso, nipping at the top of your belly button, smirking as you giggle.

As he gets to the waistband of your shorts, you feel around and gently brush your hand against his cheek, “I didn’t shave...”

Yoongi doesn’t falter but, he does take your fingertip between his lips, sucking on the end of it, “Good.”

His response fuels something inside of you and, for whatever reason, it makes you wetter.

Acceptance in all forms is sexy, what can you say?

Yoongi continues his motions down the seam of your shorts, spreading warmth and pleasure as he does.

He purses his lips, hovering over the fabric right above your clit before pushing against it with his mouth, rubbing back and forth.

The movement is slow and deliberate but, it’s enough to cause your center to throb.

Yoongi does this for a moment, before he licks up the length of your shorts.

You say nothing as he teases you because, you know his intention isn’t to be cruel.

Build-up can make or break a good orgasm.

Yoongi finally tugs down your shorts and, at the sight between your legs, he feels himself growing uncomfortably hard.

A deep breath is pulled through your nose as you feel his lips on you.

He kisses at your lips before licking up one side of you, then the other...

“Fuck, I’m hungry...”

The bit of Korean is the last thing he utters before his tongue rubs over your clit.

The sensation sends a jolt of pleasure to the base of your spine, an unstable breath leaving your lips.

You don’t have time to decipher what he says because, he quickly gets to work on eating you out.

Yoongi really is an artist between your thighs.

He knows exactly where to lick, when to suck, when to rub...

His quick but deliberate and, yet it feels like it lasts forever every time.

You feel his lips kissing and licking at your clit before your hands tangle in his hair, urging him to go harder.

And harder he goes...

You can feel yourself growing closer to cumming so, with your eyes still closed, you trail your fingers over your breasts, allowing your fingertips to ghost over hardened nipples.

Despite your lack of vision, you can assume Yoongi is watching you by the way he groans into your pussy.

“I wish I could do that for you.” He whispers, lightly pressing a finger against your entrance, “But I need my hands for something else.”

“Oh-”

The sound is involuntary, the feeling of Yoongi curling a finger inside of you prompts it from you without warning.

Yoongi can feel how close you are and, he knows it’s a matter of time before you come into his hand.

“Does it feel good?” His voice is deep but, it’s heightening slightly to accommodate the way he coos at you; he really can’t help it. He loves seeing you like this.

Your rapid nod fuels him to increase his speed, his tongue still working wonders on your clit.

“Open your eyes, try and look at me jagi...” He urges, his tone growing reedier

Of course you do as he asks and, immediately you find his gaze despite the intial haziness in your vision.

He’s barely illuminated by the city lights streaming in through your curtains but, you can see the loving smile on his face, the arousal heavy in his eyes...

“Are you gonna cum for me?” He whispers, pressing his fingers into your g-spot, creating a sinful amount of pleasure inside of you.

“Yes- yoongi...” Your moan is cut off by silence as your orgasm rears it’s head, your back beginning to arch off the bed, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum. Yoongi-”

He sighs hopelessly into your pussy, the sound of his name on your lips makes him weak, “Cum jagiya. You deserve it, cum for me...”

It’s not long before you’re sitting up, ignoring the twinkling stars in your vision as you tug your boyfriend on top of you, finding his lips immediately.

You love that you taste yourself on him and, you take your time to kiss him deeply, showing your appreciation for the work he did between your legs.

“You came so much.” He whispers, nudging at your nose as he takes his position back against the pillows whilst pulling you with him, “You did so good...”

Small words of encouragement mean a lot on a day where you aren’t feeling 100% and, they cause you to smile when you tuck your face into his neck.

“I wanna make you feel good now.” You punctuate your declaration with a kiss behind Yoongi’s ear, “Can I?”

Yoongi tilts his head to allow you better access to his neck, his hands tightening on your hips, “Please. I missed you.”

You smile then, kissing at his sweet spot again before a request leaves your lips, “Can I give you a hickey?”

This causes Yoongi to snicker, relishing in the juvenile nature of such a question but, he can’t deny that he likes it when you mark him.

“Yeah...just one though.” He warns, knowing full well how decorated his neck would become if he gave you full reign, “I have a presentation in two days.”

You don’t have control over the pout that forms on your lips, “Just one?”

Yoongi chuckles again and licks his lips before looking down at you, his brows rising in amusement, “On my neck yeah- there are other places to mark me.”

At this, you smirk, conceding with him as you secure your lips right at his sweet spot. A few kisses are placed against his neck before sucking his skin between your teeth.

Yoongi tenses up beneath you, his hands squeezing at the fabric of your shirt whilst his eyes flutter closed.

“Fuck.” He whispers, slightly breathless, “Bite harder…”

And you do by apply more force with your teeth, your free hand trailing down his stomach to palm him through his pants. His dick is pressing uncomfortably against the seam of his sweat pants, the gray material dampened with pre-cum.

“You’re so hard.” You giggle

With a loud sigh, Yoongi speaks again, his voice deepening slightly with the onslaught of arousal, “I just ate you out- what did you expect?”

With a satisfied smile, you lean back into his lips, indulging in him for a moment.

He smirks into your mouth, pulling you onto his body so you’re straddling his hips, “You wanna ride me?” Yoongi mutters whilst his hands rest on your ass.

You’re only in your t-shirt after all and, you’re now sitting on top of his hardened dick, it would only make sense to make him cum this way.

He pulls away momentarily, lips wet with spit, eyes lulled with desire, “I really want you to.” He whispers, kissing you again, batting his pretty eye lashes for you.

Biting your lip, you push his hair back away from his forehead, trying to cope with how hot he looks right now; slightly sweaty, disheveled, horny…

You want to fuck him so bad.

“Hold onto my hips and help me, I want to go at your pace…”

He smiles softly, nodding silently, heading turning toward the speaker, “Alexa- play Withdrawn by Mello…”

Your lips bubble over with laughter as a new song starts playing but, otherwise you don’t comment on it, instead opting to lean down and kiss him once more.

Moments later, Yoongi’s eyes are rolling back as he feels you sink down on him, his fingertips pressing hard into the flesh of your hips.

“Ugh shit-“ He breathes and, with his neck fully exposed, you can admire the violet mark on the side of his throat, a sense of pride filling your gut as you do.

Yoongi’s hands guide you up and down his length, his eyes squeezing shut once again as the feeling of you begins to overwhelm.

With tender lips, you lean down, kissing up the side of his throat, ensuring that your hips keep their pace on him, “Does it feel good?” You whisper in his ear and, he’s quick to turn towards you to tuck his face into your neck.

“Y-Yeah…please don’t stop.”

You don’t.

You ride him all the way off the deep end, kissing each of his pretty features as he cums, telling him you love him as he’s coming down.

Your orgasm is a natural occurrence when he’s inside of you but, it wasn’t your main focus.

Sex with Yoongi isn’t transactional.

There’s too much love for that.

You’re laying on Yoongi’s chest now, your fingertips tracing shapes over the skin on his ribs, admiring the instability in his heartbeat.

“I love this.” You murmur, turning slightly to press a kiss to his chest.

“My heart?” He smirks, combing a hand through your hair.

“Mhm- it’s my favorite.” Placing another kiss to his chest, you shoot him a pointed look, “If you say anything sarcastic regarding the fact that your heart is just an organ, I will fight you.

His body shakes with laughter but, he nods regardless, opting out of being a little shit.

“How are you feeling?”

You soften, resting your chin on his chest, “So much better. Thank you for coming over.”

He pinches your cheek, “I’m here for you anytime you need me. You know that right?”

Nodding, you kiss the hand against your face, “I do.”

“Good.” He nudges against your lips, his gums peeking out with smile on his mouth when you giggle. “I love you…”

With all the warmth in the world, you snuggle up to him and, he responds by tugging the blanket over the both of you.

“I love you too.”

824 notes · View notes

twsted-tales-of-scheherazade · 3 years

Note

Hmm, new blog. 👀 I would like to request a fluff scenario of Sebek, Idia, and Azul with a fem!reader who is color blind. Colors can be hard sometimes.

Sebek first finds out about your condition one day when you point out how Malleus' flames didn't appear green in your eyes. They just looked brown. Naturally, the fae was shocked and asked if you were joking. You shook your head 'no' and explained how some humans like you suffer from color blindness. A specific color that he sees may not appear the same as what you see.

It wasn't just Malleus' flames. Diasomnia's signature green was not present in your vision. The bright color looked brown in your eyes and you told your boyfriend as such. His shocked expression turned aghast. As expected of Sebek, he started going on about how it was unacceptable that you were not able to see his lord's brilliance.

You were used to his tangents by now and he would most likely continue for quite a while. So you got comfy in your seat and watched in mild exasperation as the fae continued speaking.

The tea he brewed is, as always, very delicious.

"Lord Lilia...I would like you a question."

The ancient fae hummed and turned his curious gaze to the first year once he put down his bagpipe (up to this day, Sebek did not know where he got that instrument from). "What is it?"

"Is there perhaps a spell that can show someone dreams? Is it possible to meet in a dream?"

Lilia raised his eyebrows at the strange question. "Certainly. But what would you do with such a spell?"

The first year cleared his throat before he started explaining. "You see, [Name] has..." His senior stayed silent and listened attentively as he explained his plans. Once he was done, Lilia smiled. "My, my. Such a sweet gift...very well. I' shall help you."

"T-Thank you very much, Lord Lilia! I apologize for my lack of skill! I vow to make this up to you."

"Nonsense. Young love is a wonderful thing, Sebek. Just tell me how that little one reacts afterward."

The next day, you had spent a few hours after school with your boyfriend in the library, studying for the upcoming exams. Ever the gentleman, he escorted you to your dorm afterward. You gave him a kiss and bid goodnight. However, before you shut the door, you heard him say "You will have good dreams tonight. I guarantee it."

It honestly made you confused. That was a rather strange way to say good night to someone. Though you didn't think much of it and got ready for bed.

...

You open your eyes to the sight of a starry sky. You blinked before shooting up, looking around your unfamiliar surroundings. The sight of the glowing flowers surrounding you took your breath away.

"W-Wh-"

"I see the spell worked. As expected of Lord Lilia and the young maste."

You turned towards the source of the voice, eyes widening once you saw Sebek. "Y-You're hair...your clothes?! They're..." You spluttered.

He sent a smug smile your way. "How do you like it, [Name]? Surely, you see the brilliant green of Diasomnia now."

Your mind couldn't process what was happening all at once. You looked at your boyfriend then out into the clearing of flowers beneath the starry sky. It seemed to stretch on endlessly.

"Is this a dream?"

"It is. Yet, it isn't." He murmured, taking a seat beside you. "This is a world created by a powerful spell of the ancient faes. Lord Lilia had helped me with it along with the young master. To be honest, I was rather ashamed that he had to assist me too...however...he wished for you to see the world in all of its beauty. Are you happy with this, [Name]?

"...Y-Yes! A hundred times, yes! I love this! I love this so much! I love you, Sebek! Thank you!" You cried before tackling him in a hug. His strong arms caught you easily. He could hear your delighted laughter right next to his ear, causing a small blush to rise to his cheeks.

"...You haven't seen anything yet." With a snap of his fingers, small green lights started rising out of the field of flowers. You gasped as hundreds of fireflies flew through the air.

"Well, what are you waiting for? Let us explore this place. We have a few hours left before you wake up."

"Yeah!"

Sebek watched from behind as you frolicked in the endless garden, pointing out new colors you have never seen before.

Illuminated by the green fireflies, you looked even more breath-taking in his eyes.

Idia knew that you were colorblind before your relationship with him started. It honestly amazed him how your condition altered the world you saw around you. He's looked up information about color blindness on the internet several times, and with each article he read, the fact that he would never understand the world you see became even more clear.

Sometimes, he would even ask you what it was like. What colors do you see? How did your condition affect your life? Once, he showed you different pictures and with every answer, he finds himself looking at them intently, marveling about how you were seeing something different. Of course, once he catches your amused stare, he turns into an embarrassing mess and ends up curling into a ball while hiding his blushing face from view.

He never stopped thinking about you though. You said that you were used to the world you're seeing. You've been dealing with color blindness for years...but was there a way to improve your vision?

Apparently, there was. They were in the form of enchroma glasses. According to the website he found - he checked the sources and confirmed that the information there was legitimate, the glasses filter out specific color wavelengths and let people with color blindness see with normal vision. However, it was also mentioned that the effectiveness of it vary depending on the severity of color blindness.

"...Filter...these glasses filter wavelengths...can I enhance that with magic?" He murmured to himself.

"Well now, Idia. This is a rather interesting project you've thought of." Azul stated as his sky blue eyes gazed at the enchroma glasses with interest. "Humans are rather interesting...so many aspects of them are new to us."

"...You'll help me, right? I already promised to give you that new board game you wanted." Idia said with a huff.

The octopus chuckled before pushing his glasses up. "Of course. It's a deal."

Both of them had a lot of experimenting to do.

...

A few weeks later, your boyfriend had asked you to visit his room since he had something to give you. Once you arrived, he urged you to sit on his bed as he rummaged through his work desk.

"Close your eyes first."

You raised your eyebrows but complied. A few moments later, you felt something being placed on your face...they felt like glasses? Why was he making you wear glasses?

"Alright. You can open them now." You felt a tingling sensation just as your eyelids lifted. What greeted you afterward was a completely different place. A gasp left your mouth as you looked around the room.

'The colors...!'

They were more vibrant, more beautiful than you could have ever imagined. For the first time in your life, you were seeing the world that other people saw. What really took your breath away, however, was how Idia looked. Especially the glow of his hair that burned a bright blue. "Wow..." You murmured before reaching out and touching his locks.

"Wh-why are you touching my hair?" And then, the glowing blue turns into flaming red as your boyfriend stammers in embarrassment. "You're so weird..."

"Thank you, Idia. I...really wasn't expecting this."

"Y-Yeah...well...you always mention how it was a pain to deal with...the color blindness. I had Azul help me out...but it still took a long time to get the desired effect..."

"I see! I'll make sure to thank Azul too. These are amazing. And you know what I love the most about this?"

"...What?"

"I got to see you become even more beautiful in a different shade of blue." You chirped, pecking his rosy cheeks.

"Ugh...what the hell was that, so cringey..." He muttered as he pulled his hood up to hide his embarrassed face.

You laughed in response and as Idia stares at your delighted expression, he feels himself falling in love all over again.

“Angelfish? Is there something wrong?" Azul asked as he stared at your depressed state. You had curled up on the sofa with such a displeased frown that he can't help but worry.

"...I wanna go into you octopus pot and stay there forever." You mumbled. The merman blinked in confusion before setting down his pen and taking a seat beside you. He patted your head, and in turn, you moved to lay your head on his lap. "Talk to me, angelfish. I'll listen to all your troubles."

"...I mixed up my clothes today."

"Pardon?"

You sighed before looking up at his eyes. "I got up late today so I had to rush. I wasn't paying attention so I wore different colored socks and shoes. My shirt was different too. It was super embarrassing..." Your frown got deeper and you hid your face with your hands, groaning. "I think someone took a video of me dashing through the school in those clothes...god. I must have looked like a moron."

Ah...so it was one of those "colorblind problems" you've told him about. It wasn't a condition that he encountered often and the most important fact he learned from his research on it was that it affects some aspects of your life. Being able to see colors are something that most creatures take for granted. But for people like you, he can at least understand that you're going to have a hard time.

"I see. Don't worry, I'll have Jade look into it. If such a video exists, then it will be deleted immediately."

"Thanks..." You mumbled, turning to the side and burying your face in his stomach. He gave you an exasperated smile, knowing that he won't be getting any more work done today.

"Shall we perhaps go to my room? It's more comfortable on the bed."

"Yeah..."

Now, you find yourself in his embrace, still upset about your mistake earlier in the day. "It's hard dealing with colors sometimes...and frustrating."

"You can always .make a contract with me." He said with a chuckle. "I'm sure I can find a way to improve your vision."

"...Tempting. But, strangely enough, when I think about it...I don't want to. I've spent so many years with my color blindness, saw the world differently from most people...it would feel kind of wrong if I suddenly started seeing everything. Sorry...I complain a lot but I don't even want to make changes...I know it's confusing."

"That's alright. I am here to listen to other's woes after all."

"Like the sea witch, right?"

"Exactly."

You giggled before both of you lapsed into a comfortable silence. He pulled you close to his chest, letting you hear the sound of his beating heart.

"Hey, Azul...can you describe a color to me? What is that color to you? Anything will do..."

He hummed before kissing your forehead. "Alright. I can certainly try. Let me see..."

“...Blue is the color of the ocean. My home filled with mysteries that humans have yet to understand. It is also the sky we see on a sunny afternoon. Do you remember, angelfish? When Jade had dragged us to the mountains, we found a clearing and decided to lay down and rest. We looked up at the sky and stared at the clouds.

And then, when the sun had set and night took over, it becomes a canvas, being filled with twinkling stars. You loved that sight too. Why we almost spent the night in the mountains because you wanted to look at those stars and engrave it into your memory.

It’s the sound of rain falling outside. The rainy weather keeps you from going outside, so you sit by the window, watching the sky's tears. Your thoughts drift and you enjoy the warmth of a blanket around your shoulders.

It is also the color of my eyes, is it not? You've told me over and over again how you loved my eyes, glittering behind my glasses. I admit that when you first said that, it had me quite flustered."

You laughed at his statement. Azul's flustered expression was a sight to see indeed.

“Blue is the frost we see when everything becomes a winter wonderland. As we spend winter together, we also await the welcoming of a new year where we'll make new memories.

...It will also mean the sadness we feel in our lives. But do not fret, because beyond that sadness will surely be something wonderful. It is a sign that you will grow as a person through the pain you've felt..."

The merman trailed off as he heard the sound of your steady breathing. It seems you fell asleep. He smiled at you fondly before closing his eyes as well. Tomorrow is a brand new day.

"There's no need to worry, angelfish. My eyes are yours. I will let you see the world through them for as long as you need me to."

Another story has been told. To tell you the truth, I did not know much about color blindness and I wasn’t sure if I portrayed it well in these scenarios, even if I did do a bit of reading around the subject. Regardless of its possible inaccuracies, I do hope you still enjoyed it, traveler.

References:

https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/513nkf/wp_explain_a_color_to_a_blind_person/

https://www.thecut.com/2018/02/my-life-as-a-woman-with-colorblindness.html

Credits for the images used on this post:

Border: https://pngtree.com/freepng/vector-title-frame_3573975.html

Lantern decorations: https://pngtree.com/freepng/ramadan-decorations-luminous-ramadan-lantern-moon-and-star_5356170.html

Divider: https://pngtree.com/freepng/european-border-curtain-pattern_4068944.html

#Alf layla wa layla #Sebek Zigvolt #twst Sebek #Idia Shroud #twst Idia #Azul Ashengrotto #twst Azul #Diasomnia #Ignihyde #Octavinelle

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baekhypnotized · 4 years

Text

i don’t love you

ღ Genre: angst, romance, fluff, songinspired!au

ღ Pairing: Baekhyun x You/Reader

ღ Summary:

"Promise me please, Baekhyun.” She looked into his eyes full of affection. Snuggling closer into his embrace, she comfortably placed her head on his chest. Hearing his heart beating fast whenever she’s being with him.

Baekhyun positioned his chin on her head, caressing her hair softly non-stop. “Promise you what, baby?” He asked curiously.

"That you will love me endlessly. That we will be together till forever.” She said, sounding like she’s begging Baekhyun to do so. He lingered his hands around her waist, embracing her tightly. Baekhyun dipped down to give a soft, long kiss on her crown. They stayed in this position for a few moments, allowing the time passes by. But no matter what, they’re in this together, committing to love each other without any regrets.

"I promise.”

ღ Warning(s): character death

ღ A/N: Hello! I finally come back with a one-shot story but it's an angsty fic. It's a song inspired fic from I don't love you by Urban Zakapa so I started to write this. I hope you guys would enjoy this story and I couldn't wait for your thoughts for this angsty fic! I recommend you guys hearing and understanding the song first! Lastly, enjoy and I love you!

ღ Word count: 5250

Baekhyun has been alone on his own. He has been staying in his apartment without meeting anyone. Not even his girlfriend. Since it’s raining season, he doesn’t have the mood to go out and take in the fresh air. Despite that, his mind is busy thinking about his relationship with his girlfriend. And should he declares as a future fiance.

They have been together for 5 years, knew each other too well that they can extend their relationship to another level. Marriage. Throughout their relationship, they never discuss further about it as Baekhyun thinks that both of them are just not fully prepare. Their family members and friends couldn’t stop asking them when would be their time to exchange vows. But, when they asked her about it in front of him, she simply answers it.

"Both of us are just not ready for it,” She answered peacefully with a soft smile. “Besides, marriage is a big thing for us as we’re not prepared to commit it yet.”

Even though she answered it peacefully, Baekhyun knew that deep inside, she was waiting for Baekhyun to propose to her. But, Baekhyun? He was too scared to do so. Because he was scared that he might be regretting it.

Baekhyun takes this opportunity to think back, flashback all of his beautiful moments with her. The gloomy sound of the rain portrays exactly like Baekhyun right now. His feelings right now are uncertain. Specifically, the feelings towards her. He doesn’t know why and how on Earth that this would be happening.

He couldn’t find the answers.

The small red velvet box in his hand got his full attention for hours. Baekhyun was fidgeting with it while thinking. Then slowly, he opens the box, revealing a beautiful silver bank with a white diamond on top of it. It’s the ring that Baekhyun bought months ago for her. But, Baekhyun has been keeping it secretly after he realised that his feelings are acting differently when she’s around him.

Baekhyun doesn’t feel the jittery feelings whenever he’s seeing her. Baekhyun doesn’t feel alive whenever she’s displaying her fondest smile to him. Baekhyun doesn’t feel his heart beating nervously whenever she confesses ‘I love you'.

Then he finally realises that he doesn’t love her anymore. Baekhyun doesn’t love her like he used to be.

But, he isn’t brave enough to say it to her. Even telling her the reasons why or even apologising. Because Baekhyun thinks that it was not his fault for falling out of love. There could be a valid reason why he doesn’t feel the same way to her. Sadly, Baekhyun couldn’t find the reason.

Even when Baekhyun scrutinizes the silver rings with his fingers, he tries really hard to imagine her face being so excited when he’s proposing. But, those images don’t appear in his head. Baekhyun tries really hard to think about her, about their moments together but none of them works. His feelings will stay the same. Nothing will save their love this time.

It wasn’t his fault after all. To fall out of love.

Baekhyun brings her out for dinner. She looks like a goddess tonight and he doesn’t lie about it. They go to a fancy restaurant because Baekhyun thought that proposing her tonight will be a very good idea despite his feelings don’t favour to love her anymore. But, he’s doing it for the sake of their parents. Baekhyun doesn’t want to disappoint them.

Throughout the dinner, she’s the one who keeps bringing up a conversation. Baekhyun just hearing and answering it. Whenever she plasters her sweet smile, his heart doesn’t skip a beat or even shaking for being too nervous. His feelings are too blank right now. And like he said, he doesn’t find the answers yet for unloving her.

I don’t love you. He whispers in his heart.

Her beautiful face could really melt hundreds of men but this time, she fails to melt Baekhyun himself. Now, he’s confused about whether he should propose to her or not because he doesn’t feel right.

As Baekhyun turns around, a couple caught his attention. The two of them seems like quarrelling for something. He then thought about his relationship with her. Would this be happening to both of them if Baekhyun finally telling the truth?

"Baekhyun? What is it?” She calls for him. Baekhyun quickly tilts his head to face her. She’s peeking to where Baekhyun was looking at but he stops her to do so.

"It’s nothing, babe.” He directly answers it, showing her a thin smile. Baekhyun continues to cut his steak as he offers to feed her. She’s literally fluttering before taking a bite. Her giggles would probably shake his heart but it doesn’t happen at all. All Baekhyun does just smiling at her.

The small red velvet box that keeps the ring nicely is in his pocket but he’s not ready for it. So, Baekhyun excuses himself to the men’s toilet, calming himself down before finally doing it. He washes his face with cold water, looking at the mirror.

You can do this, Baekhyun. Even if your love towards her has gone, just do it.

He leaves the toilet and watching her from afar. His girlfriend is adding her lipstick on her pretty lips. She tries her best to look good in front of Baekhyun. Baekhyun appreciates it, even for a bit. He walks to the table back after paying for the dinner as he invites her to have a night walk together.

As they start walking down the sidewalk, she slowly wraps her fingers around his, holding it tightly. Baekhyun was pretty shocked but he needs to keep on acting. He needs to show that he loves her even though he doesn’t anymore.

"Do you remember how we always have our night walk together, Baekhyun?” She asks him, eyes sparkling. He replies with a single nod. There are a few couples walking together tonight and they all seem to be happy while living together. Now, Baekhyun is doubting where is the feeling that he should be felt right now. Because he doesn’t feel the guilt to even hurt her. Anyone can call him a mean person but it’s his honest feelings towards her.

Nothing can force someone to be in love because of love borns when it wanted to. True love exists when both sides are falling in love without having the fear to lose each other and most important is trusting each other.

Yes, they fall in love for years. But, Baekhyun cannot express himself to love her. His love towards her has vanished without any reasons. Baekhyun doesn’t have the answers for that, even for himself.

Baekhyun stops her from walking, making her face him. He takes out the small box that he hides, sliding the silver ring on her finger. She’s beyond speechless but quickly embraces him for a hug. She keeps on thanking Baekhyun for proposing her but on the other hand, Baekhyun just simply displaying a smile. It can be called as a fake one to him.

She whispers into his ear as she confesses, “I love you, Baekhyun.” Baekhyun keeps himself shut because he doesn’t want to spoil the mood for tonight.

Well, at least he managed to make her smile, right?

I don’t love you.

As when both sides are happy preparing for the wedding, especially his fiancée, Baekhyun couldn’t feel anything. He doesn’t find the hype for it. The marriage would be nothing to him and he finally found the burdensome for it. Why would he get married without loving her? The question keeps on lingering in his mind, as the act is still on-going.

She’s being extra happy right after the proposal for sure. She meets Baekhyun more frequent because she thinks that preparing to be his wife would be a tough challenge. But, she’s ready for it. Despite that, Baekhyun gets annoyed easily whenever she always be around him. He couldn’t do his job in peace or meeting new people. It’s like his whole life is controlled by her.

I don’t love you. I don’t love you.

That words keep whispering in his ears as he wants to confess her about it. After Baekhyun thinks about it carefully, he’s finally doing it.

"I’m breaking up with you.”

I don’t love you. You probably already know.

"Baekhyun, please give me a chance for me to love you. Please, just pretend that you love me for this moment. I’m begging you.” She begs as her tears continue to stream down to her cheeks. Baekhyun’s heart doesn’t ache or hurt when she’s crying.

Even if you cry, my heart doesn’t hurt.

So he did. They fly to Tokyo together and try to spend their time together. Their title as fiancees still remains because he promised to her that they won’t talk about the separation. All she wants is Baekhyun to love her. Even though he needs to act it out. She wants his full attention on her because he knows that one day, she’s definitely missing it. Especially him.

They book a suite room for the two of them as the interior design is fascinating. Baekhyun starts to roam and discover the room but when he tries to find her, she was standing by the balcony while admiring the city of Tokyo. As Baekhyun comes closer to her, he could hear faint sobs coming from her. Despite that Baekhyun doesn’t hurt a bit when seeing her crying, the least he can do is to cheer her up.

Baekhyun circles his hands around her small frame, back hugging her from behind and placing his chin comfortably on her shoulder. She gasps softly before placing her hands onto his and caresses it. Both of them stay in this position, swaying in the cold breezy air. Unconsciously, Baekhyun pecks her cheek that makes her surprised.

"Hey, let’s go out for a date. How’s that sound?” Baekhyun asks her opinion. She tilts her head a bit to look at him, nodding her head. She almost tearing up because he sounds like the Baekhyun that she fell in love 5 years ago.

They’re visiting Ueno Park where there are a lot of people having fun together despite their ages. Baekhyun discovers that they can rent a pedal boat at the Shinobazu Pond so he invites her to rent it. She refuses it at first because she thinks that it was just a waste of money but he insists while plastering his pouty face at her. In the end, she lost over that face.

Baekhyun successfully rents the pedal boat and hands her the life jacket that they need to wear, in case if they’re falling into the pond. At first, she’s struggling to wear it as Baekhyun is busy staring at her funny moment, chuckling huskily.

"Let me help you, love.” Baekhyun steps closer to her and helps her to wear the life jacket. She was stupefied, unable to move even for an inch. She was beyond speechless when he called her that name, love.

"Done!” He yelps, ruffling her hair messily. She groans softly and tries to run away from him because she hates it when Baekhyun ruining her hair. Baekhyun just smiles playfully before giving her a hand to help her enter the boat first. The pedal boat was shaking that makes her scared that she would fall into the water. But Baekhyun promises her that he will never let that thing happen to her. When she safely have a seat in the pedal boat, Baekhyun follows to sit right beside her and they start to pedal around the boat.

It was an awkward moment for the two of them at first. Baekhyun takes out his phone and starts to record a video of her. “Babe, look at me,” She looks at him but quickly covers her face. Baekhyun uses his free hand to push her hands away She finally surrenders.

"So, how’s your first day in Tokyo?” Baekhyun initiates the talk. She giggles silently and starts looking at the camera.

"Well, it’s pretty fun at first but my boyfriend is no fun.” She answers it.

He chuckles, “It’s fiancee, okay and also, I’m a funny guy!” Baekhyun denies her as she breaks into laughter. Baekhyun finally recording her sweet smile in his phone. The sorrowful woman that he saw it when he’s breaking her heart is now smiling widely and looking so beautiful.

Baekhyun was in awe for a few seconds. “Why are you looking at me, Baekhyun?” She nervously asks.

His cheeks start to flush hard and he quickly requests for a few selfies. Then, they did. Baekhyun never sees she’s smiling this excited and he thinks that she’s grateful to spend time with him now. He comes out with an idea. Baekhyun dips his hand into the water and waits for the perfect time to do it. “Babe.”

She turns around to face him and then suddenly, Baekhyun sprinkles the water on her. Her face wrinkles in shock, feeling uncomfortable with the droplets on her face. She’s fuming in anger as she glares straight into his eyes. She then tries her best to tickle him and Baekhyun’s trying to avoid it. The boat was shaking when she’s violently moving that almost result for her to fall into the water. But Baekhyun reacts fast and catches her into his arms.

As the sun starts to set with the sky darkens into a purplish pink peaceful colour, Baekhyun is staring diligently into her eyes. He doesn’t know why but his heart finally beating fast when he admires her. Baekhyun leans closer to her face while she’s already having her eyes shut. He finally lands his lips onto hers, indulging into a long and affection kiss. She’s literally tearing silently throughout the kiss because she’s missing him so much. But, when she thinks this is wrong for the two of them, she pulls away.

"Let’s get back to the hotel, Baekhyun… It’s getting late.”

They head back to the hotel and preparing for a dinner date together. Baekhyun sets up a candlelight dinner with the help of the hotel’s staffs. Baekhyun prepares himself first into a black tuxedo and waiting for her to finish.

"Baekhyun…” She calls him. Baekhyun turns around, dumbfounded seeing a goddess in front of his eyes. She looks stunning in that ocean blue silk dress with her hair flowing on her shoulders. She applied a natural makeup look because she always feels insecure with her bare naked face.

Baekhyun invites her with a smile stretches across his face. They then walk to the restaurant as the waiter shows them to their private table. Their table was placed outdoor and they at least get the chance to admire the beautiful night sky with the twinkling stars decorating it. He helps her to sit first before he sits opposite her. The waiter serves their main course, leaving the two of them alone.

When he’s about to dig in, he realises that she’s staring silently on the food. “Hey… you’re okay?” Baekhyun asks with concerned. She simply nods before she starts to eat. Baekhyun was busy stealing glances at her throughout the dinner. He doesn’t know why but right now, he thinks that he’s falling in love with her again. But, he doesn’t want to confirm it yet because he will regret it later. They stay in silence while trying to finish their foods. They didn’t know what happened but it might be their last moment together.

Baekhyun suddenly stands up and moves closer to her. “May I have this dance with you?” He invites as she obeys. Music starts to play; Perfect by Ed Sheeran. Baekhyun places his hands softly on her waist while her hands are circling around his neck. They sway to the song, having their foreheads together. Her breathing becomes heavy because she couldn’t stop thinking that she will be separating with Baekhyun.

Her eyes start to swell with tears and she’s practically holding herself from sobbing hard. When Baekhyun finds out that she’s crying, he stops the swaying and lifts her chin up. Baekhyun caresses her cheeks with his knuckles as she slowly averts her gazes into his orbs.

"Don’t cry…” He begs but she begins to cry hard. Baekhyun pulls her into a warm embrace, pecking on her crown.

How I wish the time will stop for us. She hopes.

But even when she wishes for it, none of them would be happening. Because they were never meant to be together.

They get back to their room safely and change their clothes into comfortable pyjamas. Both of them shared the same bed for the last time as she gets closer to Baekhyun for a cuddle. He pats and lulls her to sleep as his lips comfortably on her crown. Before she gets to close her eyes to sleep, she once again stares at Baekhyun.

"I love you, Baekhyun and thank you for this moment. Thank you for loving me even for a short time.” She says. Baekhyun locks their lips together and at the same time, his heart aches so much. Maybe, he finally realises that losing her will be a great loss.

Baekhyun’s finally finds out that he still, madly in love with her. It was just himself for being blind after all this time. And Baekhyun hopes that this time, he has the chance to claim her back. He couldn’t wait any longer to confess this love to her.

Baekhyun only needs more time with her. He promises he will fix everything back in their own place.

"I love you too..." He whispers softly.

"Baekhyun…”

He is searching for her sweet voice all over the place. The place is beautiful and serene as Baekhyun’s figuring out the exact location he is right now. Her voice keeps calling for his name. He keeps on chasing the voice, finally found her as she’s plastering the softest smile that he never saw before.

Baekhyun swears, she looks exactly like an angel right now.

"Baekhyun,” She calls again, inviting his hands to hold onto hers. Baekhyun slowly brings his hands, lingering his fingers around hers. Truthfully, Baekhyun misses this moment the most. To be able to make her smile without shedding any tears. To make her fall in love with him over and over without any regrets.

Her eyes start to swell with tears but she tries her best to hold onto it. “You know, none of this is your fault. Right, Baekhyun?” She questions him as Baekhyun is clueless. What fault? What has he done?

"What fault?” He tries to ask but she resists to answer it, shaking her head. She slowly moves her hand to caress his hair gently, travelling down to cup his cheek. She was busy staring at his face from his sparkling eyes, down to his cute button nose and to his pinky lips. Gosh… she misses all of them. Her thumb is moving in circles on his plump cheek.

Baekhyun is still clueless. Suddenly, his heart feels the ache when she tears a bit. He doesn’t know what to do but the only thing that he can do is pull her into his embrace. Baekhyun pulls her into a hug as she finally wailing all over his chest. Baekhyun softly caresses her hair with his chin places on her crown. They’re in this position for a few moments longer, trying to create more memories for the two of them.

When she starts to soothe a bit, she breaks away from the hug and wipes her tears. She gives him a wide smile before patting his head playfully. “Baekhyun, I love you.” She confesses.

Finally, this time his heart stops beating for a while when she says it.

She takes his hands back, patting it gently while looking at it. “Baekhyun… after all these years, you were never my biggest mistake. You taught me what love is and also, you taught me how to be in love. You… make me fall in love with you crazily over and over. I wouldn’t forget every sweet moment that we have together. Baekhyun, I know… that you don’t love me anymore like you did before but thank you… thank you for giving me one last chance to be your love even for a short moment. I will never forget about it.”

Tears start to fall endlessly from her eyes, her voice begins to stuck whenever she tries to continue. “Byun Baekhyun, I’m sorry that I fail to make you happy. I’m sorry that I never fight for us. But, I do hope that one fine day, you can find someone that can love every inch of you. Someone that can make you the happiest man on Earth. I miss your smile… And I couldn’t wait for it to appear when you found the lucky girl. Our love doesn’t stay forever but I hope yours would stay as you dreamt of.”

She caresses his hair slowly, taking a few deep breaths. “Thank you for the memories, Baekhyun. Thank you for loving me for years. Thank you for being you. I wish that you can find your happiness without me.”

She leans closer for a kiss on his lips. The kiss lasts longer for a few minutes but it feels like time has stopped for them. Baekhyun’s heart feels like breaking apart, feeling all sorrow because it feels like it’s their last time to be together. When she breaks the kiss, a serene smile appears on her angelic face. She pulls the ring, the one that Baekhyun proposed the other day as she returns it back into his palm.

"I love you, Baekhyun and I’ll miss you.” She places a soft peck on his forehead and suddenly the whole world shuts.

Everything becomes blank for Baekhyun.

He calls her name softly as he wakes up. Baekhyun blinks his eyes for a few times, allowing his pupils to adjust the light in the room. The first thing he’s seeing is the white ceiling. He can hear the continuous beeping sound of the heart rate monitor machine. As he tries to tilt his head to look around, he was restricted with the neck cast. But, he could see his mother tearing while holding onto his hand, giving an endless peck on the back of his hand. The doctor comes to check his current condition and he declares that Baekhyun finally stables.

Baekhyun doesn’t know what happened that he ended up in the hospital because the last thing he remembers that he was meeting his fiancée. He now knows that he got into a terrible accident and had been in a coma for a week. His mother tells him that they almost lost him but now they’re grateful for Baekhyun to be alive and still breathing. He gathers all his strength and tries to ask his mother.

"Mom…” Baekhyun calls her, using his low voice. His mother still able to hear him, coming closer to him and waits for Baekhyun to say it.

"Where is she?... She didn’t come and visit me?...” He asks. Her eyes are quivering in sadness, speechless would be the exact word to describe her. But, she tries her best to give Baekhyun a hopeful smile because she doesn’t want to worsen his conditions.

"She will come later, okay?” His mother simply answers. She then gives an adoring peck on his forehead, letting her tears fall onto it. Baekhyun just nods his head like a child. As he hopes that she will be coming soon, Baekhyun wishes that she can give him another chance to fight for their love. Because his dream triggers him that it will be a big regret to lose someone that he loved the most. As Baekhyun realises something is in his hand, he opens it as the silver ring appears.

And Baekhyun doesn’t want to let her go for this time. He promises to cherish her till death do apart.

Baekhyun waits for her patiently for months.. None of his texts or calls was answered. He keeps on wondering where is she because he couldn’t wait to meet her, embracing her. Damn… Baekhyun missed her so much. Too much but he’s able to look through their pictures only to treat the longing for her. His mother doesn’t allow him to go out in the first place. Baekhyun needs fully recovers from his accident and she takes care of him. But after recovering for months, Baekhyun decided to look for her.

He drives his car to her house since it’s not that far from his parents’ house. While on his way, he finally feels extremely nervous. He never feels this nervous to meet her because Baekhyun knows that he would never miss this chance to claim her back. He couldn’t wait to meet her, hugs her and apologising for everything.

Baekhyun realises that after all this time, it was his fault. And now he’s going to redeem himself. He could do anything to get her back. Even if it takes thousands of years more.

When he arrives at her house, her mother welcomes him wholeheartedly. He hasn’t seen both of her parents for quite long but he’s happy that they still accept him. She invites him to come into the house and have a seat on the couch. Auntie goes to the kitchen to prepare him a hot tea as uncle walks downstairs. Baekhyun stands on his feet and hugs the older man. They are his family too. Uncle hugs him tightly as he pats Baekhyun’s back gently before breaking the hug. Both of them take their seats as Baekhyun is being a nervous guy, waiting for his fiancee to come and meet him.

It’s just like their old times. Baekhyun’s first meeting with her parents, feeling all nervous and pale. That old sweet moment would always be remembered for Baekhyun. And now, he couldn’t wait to see her goddess face.

Once auntie is coming to the living room with a tray with the empty cups and a pot of hot tea, Baekhyun keeps peeking by the stairs. His mind keeps on asking when will she comes and meets him. But when auntie offers him a cup of tea, Baekhyun nods his head and takes the cup from her politely as he thanks her. She sits next to uncle, looking so delighted to see Baekhyun in a great condition. Baekhyun slowly takes sip by sip of the hot tea even though his heart couldn’t stop pumping like a maniac. He’s waiting for her but she doesn’t appear.

Does she hate him? He thought.

"How are you, Baekhyun?” Uncle initiates the talk with hi. Baekhyun’s lips spread widely for a smile, placing the cup on the coffee table.

"Never felt even better like this.” He answers with a smile. The couple just smiling to each other but trying so hard to hide their pain and sadness. As the clock continues to tick, Baekhyun cannot wait any longer to meet her.

"Uncle, auntie…” Baekhyun calls, stopping for a second and takes a few breaths. “Can I meet your beautiful daughter?”

The two of them are shocked after hearing Baekhyun’s request. Auntie’s eyes start to form several tears at the edge of her eyes. Both of them have their faces turn pale. Baekhyun couldn’t interpret what is currently happening but all he wants right now is to see her. The love of his life. He couldn’t wait any longer because he wants to devote all his love on her. Despite that he failed to do so previously, he will try his best to not repeating the same mistake.

Uncle invites Baekhyun to step outside for a talk as he follows. The two men walk outside and the weather starts to turn cloudy. Baekhyun waits for him to start the talk because he’s feeling uneasy all of sudden. Uncle’s face displaying a sorrowful one that makes Baekhyun scared to hear about it.

But when uncle finally says it, Baekhyun was not scared. Instead, he is terrified because his whole world already shambles in a mess.

"She’s gone, Baekhyun.”

Those words haunting him. Baekhyun runs to the place where she is. Even when the clouds grumble and begin to rain, Baekhyun doesn’t care less about himself. All he wants is to be with her. And he finally arrives.

The cemetery.

Baekhyun searches her name at the tombstones with his legs failing to cooperate with him. His breathing becomes really hard while searching for it. He lost his hope. The rain starts to drop heavily but Baekhyun keeps on searching without stopping.

As he finally found it, he kneels on the ground with full regret. He couldn’t believe that she’s leaving him too soon. Because he doesn’t get the chance to mend all those broken promises. His fiancee is gone forever. Baekhyun starts to cry hard, blaming himself for being alive and stupid for letting her go once.

The dream that he once dreamt while he was in a coma was exactly his last time meeting her. He couldn’t see that angelic face with a fondest smile from a goddess woman. He thinks that he only lost her once but he’s wrong.

Baekhyun lost her forever.

"Why…. why did you leave me behind, love?” He questions. People might think he’s crazy right now because he’s talking alone but who cares. His memory flashbacking the incident.

It was raining heavily and Baekhyun is driving them back home from Japan with confusing feelings. He doesn’t know if letting her go would be his best decision because now, he’s terrified to lose her. Baekhyun doesn’t know about himself. If he still loves her or not. But deep inside, Baekhyun still deeply in love with her.

He just being too blind for her love. Because he was expecting high for their relationship and neglected her feelings. Baekhyun doesn’t realise that he’s been hurting her so bad but she never says so. Instead, she asked him to spend a week with her before the breakup.

Baekhyun keeps on blaming himself while staring at her peaceful face. She was too tired so she asked his permission to doze off for a few minutes. But he was careless. He almost hit someone’s car as he turns the steering wheel to avoid it. The car was spinning violently, causing it to turn over and got into an accident. And CRASH!!

Baekhyun tried to save her but his whole view turned into a pitch black.

He calls her name, hoping she’s answering it. “I’m sorry for everything… I’m sorry that I didn’t fight for our love… I’m sorry for falling out of love… I may have not expressing everything to you but… I love you, babe. Deep inside my heart, I still love you. I was too confused with my own self, thinking that I will never be the perfect one for you. If you can give me another chance, I will fix everything for the sake of you staying…” Baekhyun continues to cry. He begins to choke in-breath because he doesn’t expect that this moment is real.

"Thank you for allowing me to love you. I love you too and I’m gonna miss you badly.” Baekhyun finally says it. He has tons of things to say to her but he’s unable to do so. Baekhyun is a weak person. His nightmare finally haunting him and Baekhyun cannot have her anymore.

"Rest well, my love.”

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thdorkmagnet · 3 years

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Heyo everyone!! Happy National Hug Day!! Haha, so when I heard the news that today was all about one of the greatest forms of affection that exists, I of course had to take advantage of it and write a Starco short to celebrate! Haha I mean hugs are like 90% what that ship is. Maybe 91? I don’t know I’m too tired to do math XD So anyways I hope you all enjoy and I hope you all have someone in your life who you can celebrate today with a hug of your own. But if not, then please settle for my internet hugs.... *HUGS~~!!!*

Oh and just so everyone knows this takes place in my Light of the Sun and Stars AU. Okay thanks, enjoy.

Today had felt like it would never end.

Star couldn't remember the last time she had been this exhausted from royal duties. When she had been filling in for her parents the days had been long and hard but she had thought those days were behind her. Now she had plenty of friends to help her and lend her a hand. Except today.

Today had been a disaster the moment she woke up. Between helping plan renovations on poor Monsters homes as part of her Wellness Act and judging some art contest or whatever for her parents, Star already had a full day of work. But on top of that the MHC had decided again to have another 'emergency meeting' and throw off her whole schedule. The 'emergency' was nothing more than a few rumors circulating about Monsters trying to overthrow the Mewmans. It had taken everything Star had in her not to roll her eyes. Did these guys seriously believe everything they heard on the Mirror Web? She managed to disprove all of the accusations but that had taken hours and she had been forced to endure so, so many lectures on why treating Monsters equally was a bad idea.

By the time she finally got back to Mewni she was ready to explode with anger. And she still had a few hours of work ahead of her.

Finally, Star’s endlessly long day drew to a close, the blonde royal never happier in her life to see the sun set on the horizon even if she sadly missed the chance to watch it with Marco. By the time she was finished with all her work stars had begun blinking into view in the inky black sky above. But Star didn’t care about any of that, all she wanted to do was get to her room and rest, maybe sleep for the next hundred years or until Marco gave her a kiss to wake her, whichever came first.

The girl’s whole body was slumped forward as she trudged through the halls to her room, moving at a pace that would make a snail look like a track star. Her feet ached, her eyelids felt so heavy it was a constant fight to keep them open, and her hair was a tangled, frizzy mess. But none of that mattered right now because with every step she was getting closer and closer to her bed. The very thought of being enveloped in her warm sheets made her sigh in longing.

She managed to get into her room without falling asleep on the floor and she closed the door leaning heavily against it. She smiled at her brightly lit room, thinking to herself, it’s good to be home. But before she could crawl over to her bed, she heard a familiar voice call her name. Star turned to be greeted by a smiling face and bright, brown eyes, which hovered mere inches away from her, hopping up and down in excitement. The splash of red that covered the top half of his body seemed to express his exuberant mood perfectly and his spinning suns were almost hypnotizing with their glow.

“Hey Marco,” Star greeted as cheerfully as she could, though she lacked the energy for enthusiasm.

Marco didn’t seem to notice his girlfriend’s tired state as he continued hopping around the room. “I’m so glad you're back! I could barely wait for you to get back!”

Star grinned tiredly at her boyfriend, rubbing at her eye numbly. “Oh why? Is there something going on?”

Marco giggled as if she had just said the funniest thing he had ever heard. “Did you forget what today was?”

She tried not to gaze longingly at her bed and forced her eyes to remain focused on Marco, wanting to give him the full attention he deserved, even if she didn’t feel up for it right now. She blinked, taking way too long for her brain to register his question and struggled to form any coherent thought to answer him but nothing came to her lethargic mind. “Is it someone’s birthday?” she guessed, massaging her eyes with her palms.

“No, silly. It’s Thursday and you know what that means…” the boy began, before giving her a sly grin to see if she caught on or not.

Realization hit Star like a train and she gasped. “Date night.”

“Exactly!” Marco exclaimed, pumping his fists into the air, overjoyed his girlfriend had finally remembered. “And you said the other day that for tonight’s date we could go see Ol’ Youthful. It’s said it only goes off once every 37 years and tonight is that night! If we don’t go see it today we won’t be able to again until we’re old!” The boy was again hopping around the room, his excitement too much for him to bare, needing to express his enthusiasm through movement.

Star took a moment to let all of this sink in, before she bit her lip nervously. “Oh right? That?” she muttered, burying her face in her hands. She had forgotten all about her promise and had instead used up all her energy on dumb stuff like running Mewni instead of the things that mattered, like Marco. The weight of her bad decision pressed down on her chest, making it hard to breathe. She didn’t want to disappoint Marco, not for anything. She would rather die than see the smile fall from his face and she could tell just how much he was looking forward to this.

But while her heart said one thing, her body disagreed. All her aches and pains over the day’s long, strenuous activities making themselves known, aggressively arguing her desire to please her bestie. She couldn’t physically hold up traveling all the way to Earth, there was just no way. She felt a few disheartened tears leak out of her eyes and drip onto her palms and she wiped them away ferociously with the little energy she had left.

Then she looked solemnly over to Marco, watching with a heavy heart as he continued bouncing around her room and regrettably opened her mouth to speak. “Uhh, Marco.” She paused, waiting until the hooded teen met her eye and the hope and joy in his expression made her feel like the lowest creature in any dimension. “About date night…” Star didn’t have the heart to finish the sentence, a hand rubbing nervously up and down her arm as she struggled to speak.

Marco cocked his head to the side and finally took a good, long look at his girlfriend since she entered her room. He noticed the thick bags that hung heavily under her eyes, her shaking legs as if they were struggling to keep her upright, and her slouched form. She looked exhausted and half-dead and all thoughts of date night flew from his head, now solely focused on helping his blonde bestie. “Are you okay, Star?” he asked worriedly, stepping over to her to give her a more thorough examination. Or catch her in case she collapsed.

Star shook her head. “I had a really long day. Like seriously, realllly long. Like all-I-want-to-do-is-lay-down-and-not-move-for-the-next-24-hours long. And I just don’t think I have it in me to go see that young thing you were talking about.”

“Ol’ Youthful?”

“Yeah,” Star said with a nod of her head. She hung her head in shame before muttering sadly, “I’m sorry, Marco. I hate to disappoint you.”

Marco stared at his girlfriend in shock for a moment, before it softened into a loving grin. Without a word he pulled Star into a tight hug, holding her close to his chest and wrapping his arms around her. Star blushed, not expecting the sudden hug and found herself leaning heavily into her boyfriend’s body. Even though Marco wasn’t exactly known as the strongest Mewman alive, far from it, his hold on her was unwavering, holding her upright through sheer force of will, even though Star could feel her legs going out on her, surprising her more than the actual hug had.

“M-Marco.” she whispered, feeling her heart cheekmarks thumping in time to her heartbeat.

“It’s okay, Star,” the boy finally said, giving her body a gentle squeeze. “You don’t have to feel bad for anything. We don’t have to go see Ol’ Youthful. We can just stay here and rest.”

Star bit her lip, feeling her stomach churn with guilt. “Are you sure? I know you really wanted to see it.”

Marco nodded, still not breaking off the hug. “Yeah, it’s fine. Your health is way more important to me than some geyser.”

“You don’t have to miss it!” Star supplied, pulling out of the hug so she could fix him with a supportive grin, wanting to find some way to make it up to her boyfriend. “I mean just cause I don’t feel like it doesn’t mean you can’t go! I bet Jackie and Janna would want to see it! Heck, I bet if you asked, Tom, Ponyhead, and Kelly would all take you, too!”

Marco stared deep into his girlfriend’s eyes, seeing her burning need to please him and her own lingering guilt buried deep in her stunning pupils. A small, flicker of emotion washed over him, like a tiny, dull heartbeat, whispering to him Star’s true thoughts thanks to their bond. And because of this Marco didn’t even hesitate as he shook his head firmly no, much to his royal friend’s surprise. “No. I won’t go without you, Star. It just wouldn’t be the same. If we can’t both go, then I don’t wanna go at all.”

Star’s gaze softened, unable to hide the flicker of joy that flashed across her face. “Really? Are you sure?”

Marco nodded with no regrets. “Positive. I don’t care what we do, so long as I can do it with you.”

Star couldn’t hold back the coo as her eyes shined with love and joy. “Awww, Marco!”

Marco gave her a bright grin as he added, “Besides, we can always see the next eruption in 37 years.”

Star giggled, before gently kissing his cheek. “It’s a date,” she replied tenderly.

After that, Marco made a pile of pillows and blankets for the two of them to lay in and rest, while Star fought back against the narrow grip of exhaustion, pushing it back so she could stay awake and be with her favorite person for a bit. Marco lay back on the cumfy cushiony mountain he had crafted, before Star lay down on his chest, the boy holding her close in a warm hug. Star snuggled deep into the soft embrace as her consciousness slowly faded. The seconds ticked by at a slow speed, while the two Mewmans cuddled each other on the floor, their eyes closed, their faces peaceful.

“Marco?” Star whispered, after a while, her voice sluggish as the last of her mind fought against the exhaustion, needing to know one more thing before she could sleep in peace.

“Hmm?” Marco muttered, his voice ringing with the same life and energy as before but his body still and relaxed.

“Are you sure you don’t regret this?” Star asked, feeling stupid for asking.

Marco shook his head lazily, before whispering, “Actually, Star. There is no place I’d rather be.”

And Star knew he meant it.

Star smiled. There was something about Marco’s hold that made Star feel safe and warm. Like she could melt into him and become a part of him, just existing blissfully inside his heart where she no doubt belonged. There were so many uncertain things in Star’s hectic world but as long as her Marco was holding her nothing could touch them, no darkness could enter into the world that existed in their arms. And so, she gave in, sighing happily and snuggling deeper into his hoodie, loving the way the soft fabric tickled her skin before falling into a long, blissful sleep.

#star vs #Star vs AU #My Writing #Light of the Sun and Stars #Light of the Sun and Stars Shorts #Starco #National Hug Day

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watchtower-feed · 4 years

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Death Do We Part (Part 4)

SSA Spin-off ✧ Jason Todd ✧ Physical Link ✧ 1 ✧ 2 ✧ 3 ✧ 4 ✧ 5 ✧ 6 ✧ 7 ✧ 8 ✧ 9 ✧ 10 ✧ 11 ✧ 12 ✧ 13 ✧ 14 ✧ 15 ✧ Notes: Hold out for the next part because I’m telling you it’s going to have the worst combination ever: smut and angst. Also, this is turning into a 6-8 part series and I feel like I’m running out of words. I might post fillers some days but this story will definitely be finished this month. Words: 2,700+

Your voice echoes in the cave and the only reply you get are their stares. You start laughing hysterically while looking around the room. “Is that what Robin really is? Someone so replaceable? You just find stray kids in Gotham and turn them into unknowing soldiers!”

You’re breathing through your mouth and you close it immediately. You walk up right to Bruce and glare up at his tall figure. “Jason died. As Robin. He was Robin. And he died because of you.”

Bruce doesn’t flinch. You keep staring at him, waiting for a reply. Then a thought hits you and your eyes widen. “This is why you don’t want him to know everything,” you’re whispering now and looking frantically at the ground, “If he finds out… Even with his memories, you’re afraid he’ll turn against you .”

Jason tosses and turns in his bed. He stares at the last words he wrote to you and the empty space where yours was hours ago. It’s true. He doesn’t know who you are. He doesn’t even remember who he is.

He grunts and sits up. He stares out the small window of his room. His cell. His prison. Ra’s and Talia told him he was free to go any time he wanted. What a cruel thing to say to someone who doesn’t know where he is. Not to mention wherever he is is surrounded by mounds and mounds of sand drifting endlessly with the harsh winds.

“Yeah,” he sighs to himself, “like hell.”

What does he even tell you? ‘Y/N, I think I’m in a desert somewhere. You have to look out for a secret base that’s heavily guarded by hundreds of assassins trained to maim intruders on sight.’ Knowing you for just a few hours, he already knows you would rush out and probably get yourself killed trying to save him. Then you’re both dead. Again.

“No thanks,” he jokes to himself. “Not again. Not for a looooong while this time.”

Jason suddenly grits his teeth and buries his face in his pillow, angry that he’s just talking to himself. But how can he talk to you now?

Sleep doesn’t come to Jason. The moment the sun peeks over the sands outside his window, there’s a knock on his door. Talia doesn’t wait for his answer.

“It’s time, Jason.”

She stands by the door. Jason grunts loudly and throws the blanket aside. He walks behind Talia as they enter the main chamber of the fortress.

When Jason last entered this chamber, there were hundreds of assassins clad in black just standing around, stiff and on alert. There was an old man seated on the floor in the middle in colorful garments of red and orange with some green accent. Jason almost laughed at how his mustache hung down the side of his face because of how long it was.

Now, though, all the humor has definitely left him. There’s only the old man sitting on the floor, Ra’s Al Ghul. Talia’s father. The leader of the League of Assassins. The deadliest secret army in the world. And they had asked Jason to join them.

“Have you made up your mind, young man?” Ra’s asks the moment Jason and Talia stood in front of him. Jason doesn’t answer and doesn’t look at him. Ra’s narrows his eyes at the boy and then glares at his daughter.

“Perhaps, father, some incentive will tip his decision toward the League.”

That definitely caught Jason’s attention, “What kind of incentive?”

“Information,” Talia smirks before she turns back to her father. “Knowing about his past will do no harm.”

Ra’s tightens his lips before nodding. Talia sits down and waits for Jason to do the same.

“What do you want to know first?” she asks.

Jason mulls it over. What does he want to know first? Should he ask about you? Do they know about your link? How much do they actually know about him really? Should he just go for the painfully obvious?

“How did I die?”

Talia smiles as if it was the right question to ask. “You were murdered. You were with your mother,” Jason flinches, “Trapped in a warehouse that was rigged to explode the moment a vigilante called Batman arrived near the perimeter.”

Jason’s eyes widen and Talia stops talking. This is definitely too much information. And not enough information at the same time. Why isn’t she saying anymore?

“Did the Batman rig the explosion?” he finally asks.

Talia raises an eyebrow, “Him? No. The man who killed you is a madman who murders for no reason. The Joker.” She pauses while Jason takes it in. “Batman,” Talia says the alias with softness, “he was trying to save you. The Joker has always been a thorn in Batman’s side and a menace to Gotham-- that’s where you’re from. He’s always trying to push Batman to his limits, trying to find a way to get him to defy his most-honored code: no killing.”

Ra’s makes a small sound, somewhere between a sigh and a grunt. Talia continues, much gentler this time, placing a hand on Jason’s leg, “He used your death for the same cause.”

“I don’t understand,” Jason is frustrated, “why me?”

Ra’s speaks up, “You’re Batman’s partner. You were also his adopted son. Bruce Wayne’s adopted son.”

Jason’s eyes widen. He shifts his eyes between the two of them, wondering if they’re lying. From everything you have told him, he knows that his parents both left him and he chose to live on the streets. Now Jason understands why you never told him anything beyond that. It’s too close to this. It’s the cause of everything.

“These names may not mean anything to you now, but once your memories return, you’ll know.”

“And did he?” Jason’s voice raises their curious glances. “Did he kill the Joker?”

“No,” Talia answers him, her eyes narrow as she stares into the distance behind him, “No, my dear. It’s clear that his code is the single most important thing to him. Over anyone.”

Jason clenches his fists. “I’ll do it. I’m in.”

✧ ✧ ✧

You wake up in your new room from someone knocking. You groan and bury your face deeper into the pillow. Your body feels heavy and fatigued even though all you’ve done for the past couple of days is sleep. Ever since your confrontation in the cave, you have less hope of making Jason cooperate and lesser will to help Bruce in his search.

The knocking continues. Louder this time and more incessant than all the other times. You want to stomp to the door and yell at Alfred but none of this is his fault. It’s all Bruce. If he hadn’t adopted Jason, the two of you would be working right now, living paycheck to paycheck, in a studio apartment, maybe with a dog. At most you would be together.

You hear a key jamming into the lock and you shoot up right away. You run to the tall window and hurry it open. When you’re holding the frames and getting ready to climb out, a familiar voice chuckles behind you.

You turn to Dick, standing by the doorway, amused. “Breaking your legs might get Jason to start talking to you again. Sure.”

You glare at him and then smile. You step away from the window frame and run to him. He catches you in his arms and hugs you. “You were gone too long!”

Ever since your fight with Bruce, Dick has been the only one who’s upfront with you with everything. He kept you company whenever you felt lonely and he would update you with everything that’s going on with the search for Jason. But two days ago he left to take care of something in Bludhaven.

“Next time, please take me with you. I don’t think I can lock myself in this room any longer.” Dick frowns and then turns his head to the side, avoiding your gaze and biting his lip. You narrow your eyes and sigh, “You’re leaving again, aren’t you?”

“The Titans need me. I’ll be gone for a month, at most.”

“A month!?”

“I’ll call you every chance I get, okay?” Dick chuckles, trying to lighten the mood. Then he stops and looks at you with a serious expression, “But you know, you should really start talking to Bruce again.”

You suddenly feel betrayed, “I have nothing to say to him.”

But Dick was having none of this today. Your sulking attitude has been going on for days and it’s not helping anyone. “If not to him, then do it for Jason. Tell him about Jason, about the things you might be feeling that can help find him.”

His words just make you angrier. He sighs and pats your head. “You know he blames himself, right? For everything. He’s hurting too.” Your resolve is weakening because Dick’s voice is turning into a whisper, “He loves Jason, too. We all do.”

He tries to look at you while you look at the ground. Finally, you return his gaze. “So I’m asking you. As a favor for me. Stop hiding in Jason’s room and go help Bruce.”

You don’t. But you do stop locking yourself in Jason’s room. It turns out that the manor is empty most of the time. Sometimes you’d find Alfred in the living room or one of the many studies every now and then and talk to him. He smiles every time you strike up a conversation.

You’re surprised to hear he knows so much about you and your family. Then a little sad when you find out why.

“Would it make you feel better to know that a lot of people attended?”

You shake your head, “Did my… did my parents cry?”

“Your mother was always trying to hold back her tears and your father cried when he and master Bruce buried your caskets.”

Your eyes quickly water and you have to look away from Alfred to rub them harshly.

“Ah, Master Tim, you’re back.”

“Yeah I was--” Tim stops the moment he notices you. You try to make yourself small and look away, stubbornly ignoring your tears, hoping he won’t notice. “Oh sorry.” It’s the first time you’ve seen Tim again since finding out he’s the new Robin. In civilian clothing, he really does look nothing like Jason.

He may be close to Jason’s height when you last saw him but Tim’s limbs look longer because of how slender he is. You wonder if he can actually hold his own in a fight. Can he protect himself?

Tim turns to leave, “I’ll just--”

“No, wait,” your voice surprises Tim, Alfred, and yourself. “I’m… sorry.” You rub the back of your neck but continue to avoid looking at him, “None of this is your fault. It doesn’t even have anything to do with you.”

Tim gives you an uncertain smile and chuckles a little, “Thanks? I guess.”

You don’t reply because you just feel embarrassed. That was a stupid and resentful thing to say.

“Oh hey,” Tim walks up to you while pulling out his phone. “We were checking out the surveillance at the graveyard and thought maybe you would want to see this.” He shows you a video of your friends visiting your gravestone. At first, it looks like one of them is crying and then someone hugs them. Quickly, unexpectedly, it turns into an intense makeout session over your grave which makes you cringe.

“You have a messed up sense of humor, don’t you?”

Tim places a hand on his hip and smirks, “Comes with the job. Pretty much a requirement if you want to work with the fairy godmother of Gotham.”

And just like that, you find that you don’t mind Tim so much. He’s not Jason but he can be your friend. You can definitely go to him to badmouth Batman once in a while. He seems to be good at that.

Then Tim sees the thin slash appear on your cheek before you even feel it. It shocks Alfred onto his feet as well. “Y/N, your cheek!”

Tim runs out of the room to get the first aid kit while Alfred asks you a barrage of questions. “Are you okay? Does it hurt? Is it master Jason?”

Slowly, you touch your cheek and feel the sting of an open wound. Your fingers are smeared with blood. “I don’t know…” you whisper in a panic.

Tim comes back and immediately dabs it with a gauze. “It’s not deep. But it’s definitely a clean cut. A bullet or a sword.”

Neither of those possibilities makes you feel better at all. You immediately take out the pen Alfred gave you on your first night.

Jason are you okay? Are you in trouble? Are you hurt?

The three of you wait for his reply, standing in a circle with your arm in the middle. After several minutes, Tim narrows his eyes and gives up. He goes through the first aid kit and takes out some antiseptic and a smaller gauze.

You let him tend to your wound but you never take your eyes off of your arm. Alfred finally sighs, dejected, and closes his eyes. He holds the back of his chair for support before heading for the door. “I’ll inform Master Bruce. Please tell us right away if there’s news.”

“You should go, too,” you mutter loud enough for Tim to hear.

He looks at you for a second but you’re still staring intently at the clear skin on your arm, waiting. Tim finally turns to go and closes the door behind him. You stand there for hours. You can see the sun’s rays dimming behind you.

Finally, Alfred returns. He looks upset the moment he sees you. He sighs and calls you for dinner. You shake your head and turn away so you don’t have to see him.

When he closes the door you immediately remember Dick. He’ll probably tell him what happened, how you’ve gone back to making no progress at all. Why are they obsessed with helping you anyway? They should be more concerned with Jason right now. Like you are.

Did it hurt?

The words are clear even in the partial darkness and your hands shake as you immediately reply.

No. I didn’t feel it. Are you okay? What happened?

You finally sit down slowly as you watch more writing appear on your arm, making you relieved.

Just some exercise. Got a bit careless. I’m okay.

It’s the most Jason has ever written to you, the most he’s been civil and sympathetic since you came back to life. You hope he doesn’t stop writing.

By the way, I found out about how we died.

You gulp immediately. Your pen is hovering over your arm when his next words arrive.

I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have had to go through that. How come you didn’t tell me?

You’re angry again and tears are pouring down your cheeks.

No, Jason. It’s not your fault. It’s not! I didn’t tell you because I knew you were going to blame yourself and

And? And what? Bruce told you not to tell him? Because he would never come home? You bite your lips.

reminding you of who you are is more important than that.

You cringe as you write it. It’s true but you also know you’re using it as a lie to cover up the truth. You quickly write something again before he does.

I would die ten more times for you. If it means we can finally be together.

Jason laughs and a small blush is growing rapidly along his cheeks. He finds your tenacity amusing.

Have you always been this sappy? Did I write corny shit like that back to you?

You almost scoff at his reply. It’s nice to see that his personality still hasn’t changed. You smirk and look at the small writing Dick had done on your other arm, the arm you and Jason don’t write on because of the last thing he wrote. You circle it and write beside it.

Like this?

You feel a little smug but then there’s a long pause and then his writing.

Did I write that just before we died?

You bite your lips and rest your head against the back of the chair. You pinch yourself twice. You still know how each blow felt like and sometimes your muscles would spasm when you see it in your head. The moving room. The floor meeting your face. That crowbar that you now know was used to beat up Jason.

You can still feel the sudden sucking air before the huge blast knocks your body away and the loss of all feeling before you even hit the ground. You lost your consciousness mid-air. You wonder if it was because of the strength of the blast or the sensitivity of your link, but from what Dick had told you, your body was thrown against the wall by an invisible force.

You hug yourself and watch new writing appear.

Did it hurt?

You lay your head to the side. Exhausted from this conversation. Already tired of this second life.

Jason, please. Come home.

✧ 1 ✧ 2 ✧ 3 ✧ 4 ✧ 5 ✧ 6 ✧ 7 ✧ 8 ✧ 9 ✧ 10 ✧ 11 ✧ 12 ✧ 13 ✧ 14 ✧ 15 ✧

✧ Watchtower Masterlist ✧

#ssa #superhero soulmate au #DC fanfiction #DC imagines #DC reader insert #Jason Todd fanfiction #Jason Todd imagine #Jason Todd x reader #watchtower-feed #atbucud #Jason Todd #Red Hood

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desarcalize · 3 years

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Dusk 14: The memories we shared

Cross and Sarah returned to the monastery. The young girl had black circles under her eyes and her skin was pale. She passed next to the other two members without telling anything. She entered her room and closed the door behind her, without wanting to talk to anyone. Cross explained everything that happened and Mother heard everything in shock. In their way back, Sarah didn’t sleep the whole night and she didn’t eat anything.

During the dinner, Cross knocked her door, but no respond. He lowered his head. She had to eat three days and she denied to step out of her room. He opened a little the door and Timcanpy entered the room to accompany her and have an eye on her.

Sarah was sitting on her bed hugging her legs and having her jaw on her knees. Her eyes were swollen and red. She was looking to the void, with empty thoughts. Timcanpy took her scarf in his teeth and flied to her, dropping it on her head. He started flying around her, trying to make her feel better. She took the scarf in her hands and looked at it.

“Fire slowly burns… as the boy is drifting off to sleep” she whispered among the sobs “Red embers flame in the ashes… of our memories” she put her face on the scarf, crying again.

During the night, they were all sitting on the table of the kitchen. Without talking. They heard footsteps and turned, seeing Sarah standing on the stairs. She approached them and stood next to the table.

“Do you… Do you have a little bread?” she whispered cowardly and smiled a little

The three members smiled, been happy that she finally got out of her room and asked for food. Cross stood up approached her and took her in his arms. She closed her eyes, enjoying the warmness of Cross’s hands.

“I shouldn’t have taken you with me” he whispered “No. It was better like that” she said and stepped back, smiling.

The years passed. Sarah’s hair became quickly gray, because of her sadness. It was very hard for her to get through it. Cross told her to throw away the scarf, because it reminds her Mana and this cause her to be sad.

“But this is the reason I keep it” Sarah said and Cross looked at her confused “It reminds me of Mana, the real Mana, not the one who changed because of Millennium Earl” “Why though? Why do you want to keep his memory?” “Because he was an important part of my life” she said smiling.

Cross lowered his head and remembered of Maria. Their love stories were similar. Cross inhaled because he knew that the nun was right. Someone knocked the door of the monastery and Cross walked in the main corridor and opened it. Allen was standing, smiling to them.

“I came to say goodbye” he said “So, you decided, you are leaving” Cross said “Yeah. I am going to London” he was holding the bible. Cross noticed that before some days, the bookmark was at the last chapter, now it was in the middle.

“Are you reading the bible backwards?” “Well, you see…. I can explain. It is not having to do with a Devil’s trick” he said and lowered his head “I just… I just thought that if I read it backward, it will be like I change the time. I makes me feel better to forget about Nea and Mana” “If this brings jubilation to your soul, I cannot say or do anything” They saw Sarah approaching them. She smiled to the blondie man “Your hair” he whispered “You changed to much in only three years, Sarah” “A lot of things happened in these three years” Sarah said smiling.

It was true, after Nea’s death, Mana and Sarah left for almost nine months and went to France, where they became members of European Branch’s Black Order. Sarah met Cross’s classmate and partner when he was training himself to be an Exorcist master, Froi Tiedoll.

Froi was a clam but kind and friendly man. He quickly became friend of Sarah and they went in a mission together. After Millennium Earl’s return, the Akuma attacks became a more frequent phenomenon. Their missions were many, but Sarah learned quickly to control her wings completely.

In her first mission, her wings were weak, a little soft and easy to break against the Akuma attacks. She was in the hospital of Black Order and they brought her food. She looked the big amount of food and she was surprised from herself when she ate all the plates they gave to her.

“Slow down” Cross said laughing “You are going to become fat” “No, she will not” they heard from the dark and they saw a young woman with blondie hair. She was some years older than Sarah and there was a monkey on her shoulder, which left and climbed Sarah’s bed. He took the pie which was in the nun’s plate and returned to his owner, eating it “You little thief” the blondie said laughing and turned to Sarah “I am sorry for that” “It’s fine” the young woman said smiling “Better for me. I will eat less” “You need to eat. You are a parasitic type user. It is the only way to keep your Innocence strong. Lau Shimin is a parasitic user too” she said showing the monkey on her shoulder “But, I heard that your wings were easy to break, don’t you eat well?” Sarah lowered her head “For days I didn’t eat anything, because of reasons which made me feel sad and depressed” “I see. Don’t do that again” the blondie woman said and turned to leave “Eat as much as you want. Your Innocence needs it. You need it” “Wait” Sarah said before the woman was ready to go out of the hospital room “What is your name?” The woman smiled and turned to her “Is Klaud Nine” “I am Sarah Miller” “I know, everyone was talking about you when you arrived. Parasitic users are rare. Well, see you around, Sarah and Cross” she smiled and left the room.

After many months she returned to England, were her hair started to be gray. Cross suggested to her to dye her hair black, but she said that she wants to keep the results of her past and her mistakes. Cross couldn’t change her mind and didn’t want to persuade her. They weren’t sad when Allen left, but it bothered them fact that he stopped send them letters suddenly, for months. They thought that maybe he had problems with his religious school, but months and later years without a letter was too much.

After some months, the circus arrived to Fordwich. It was Sunday and the villagers arrived the church for the Divine Service. Sarah heard some priests shouting telling to someone to go away. She approached them and she saw two priests pushing a clown away from the courtyard of church. One of the pushed him and he felt to the ground

“What is going on?” she asked them and helped him stand up “This joker wants to get in the church” one of the said “And what is the problem with that?” the nun asked “He is a clown! Don’t you see the way he is dressed and his makeup? How can we accept him?” the other said “The God accepts everyone, however they are” the clown was playing with his hands, making funny expression “He is a creep” the first said and they left. Sarah turned smiling and looked the clown, who started walking to a tree of the yard and touched it “When did this tree came out?” he asked “What do you mean?” “I was here, one month ago” the clown said and looked around “And this tree wasn’t here” Sarah laughed “Maybe you didn’t notice it” “Maybe” the clown said and continued walking, whispering lyrics of a song “I will still pray endlessly for this young boy…” Sarah looked at him, shocked “How… How do you know this song? Who are you?”

The clown smiled and ran to her, standing next to her and looked at her from the top to the bottom.

“If I remember correctly, you weren’t here before one month too. Are you new here?” “No, I am here thirty-six years now” “No, I don’t remember you” the clown said dancing around her “I am searching for someone. A seventeen years old girl” “Who? Why?” “The girl’s name is Sarah. Sarah Miller. The reason is personal. I have to see her one month now” “I am this girl. But she was seventeen years old thirty-two years before” “No” the clown said and stepped back “No. You are lying. I left Sarah one month ago. In this yard. You aren’t Sarah. You are an old woman. Sarah didn’t have gray hair, but black, the raven’s wing” “Mana” the woman said and approached him “It’s me. Look my eyes, they haven’t change” “You are lying” he shouted “You are a liar! Where is Sarah? Why don’t she come to see me? She hates me, right? This is what she told me. She told me “I hate you Mana”. I heard it. She hates me” he started crying like a child. Sarah stepped back, scared. Mana’s memories are complicated. He ran to her and grabbed her from her shoulders “Why does she hate me? What have I done to her? I loved her. I loved her and she hates me. Why?”

Sarah was scared. She was afraid that Mana will hurt her, because he doesn’t recognize her, because he is lost in the memories’ abyss. She felt a hand grabbing her from her exorcist uniform. She was pulled back and saw Cross’s back in front of her. He looked at the clown with a furious look.

“Why is this clown bothering you?” “Cross” Sarah whispered “This clown is Mana” “What?” he looked at his face, trying to find anything that would remind him the handsome young man with the milky skin, brown eyes and long brown hair “Get lost” he whispered and the clown stepped back. He lowered his head and a tear ran on his cheek “Tell to Sarah” he whispered “That whatever I did, whatever was the reason that she hates me, I apologies for this reason”

He turned and left the courtyard. Cross turned and saw Timcanpy flying around him.

“Follow him and record everything” Cross said “I want to know what he is doing and what he is planning to do, 24/7. Just be careful not to be noticed”

Timcanpy flied away and followed Mana. Cross clicked his tongue and turned to Sarah, who had her face lowered. He passed next to her and patted her shoulder. Timcanpy returned when circus was ready to leave. Cross saw and heard everything the Mana was saying and doing. He was confused. This man doesn’t look anything like Millennium Earl.

“Maybe he is a split” Mother said “You have a point” Cross said and inhaled “He is searching for Nea. He remembers almost everything about his days in the monastery. He thinks that before one month he left us. He doesn’t remember that he killed and devoured, but he remembers Sarah’s last words to him” “Maybe he is bluffing” “No, he seems so desperate to find Nea. But now the circus is leaving. We will see him again in Fordwich the next year. Unless…” he thought about it a little and looked Timcanpy “How fast can you fly?” he questioned the golem, but it was more like a rhetoric “What do you have in your mind?” “Timcanpy will be my eyes and ears” Cross said and approached his room, taking a box of his tools “He will follow the circus and take records of Mana. He will return every end of the month, giving me the informations he found”

After two days of experiments. He knew that the golem was ready for it’s purpose. He got out of the church and let it go, following the way that the circus went to the next city.

#dgm #d gray man #desarcalize #cross marian #sarah miller #nea walker #neah d campbell #nea d campbell #neah #mana walker #mana d campbell #mana #past!allen #my story #my oc #katsura hoshino

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pastthebutterflies · 3 years

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It’s For You (Little Lady)

As it turns out, running away to a magical alternate dimension to avoid her problems ended just as badly as Luz thought it would.

Part two of what’s now my “Camila Comes Through the Door” series! I’m posting this late, so feel free to point out any glaring mistakes. Otherwise enjoy!

Ao3 link in the reblogs!

So, fun fact!

As it turns out, running away to a magical alternate dimension to avoid her problems ended just as badly as Luz thought it would.

In her defense, Luz really hadn’t expected her mom to actually find a way into said dimension (thanks, Owlbert). The plan had always been to stick around until the end of the summer, then head back home acting as if yes mom, camp was very educational and yes mom, she really did feel much more like everyone else now. Then, in theory, continue jumping back and forth with the door to continue her training and see her friends. Without Camila ever finding out about said secret double life.

Needless to say, those plans all went out the window the moment Camila stepped through the portal, right into Eda’s booth, where she had spotted Luz immediately and tried to all but drag her back home.

Fortunately- or unfortunately, depending on who she asked- King had been so surprised by the sudden arrival that he had shot straight from Luz’s arms and into the air, shocking them all enough for Eda to suggest they head back to the Owl House before they drew too much attention to themselves.

Which was what led to Luz hiding in the kitchen with Eda as King and Hooty chattered endlessly to Camila about who knew what and most definitely did not help the situation.

Eda leaned against the counter, staring boredly as her eyes tracked Luz’s movements back and forth across the floor with one hand in her hair while the other gestured wildly in the air.

“-And how did she even get here? Owlbert is so good at staying out of sight, how did he get caught?” She groaned. “And why did he have to find Mom of all people?”

“Kid, he’s an owl. Even your world has those, of course he was out in the open. She said he took her keys, which are shiny, not to mention strange and unusual compared to the ones we use on the Isles, they would have sold like wildfire. Obviously he was going to take them.”

“But why my mom? Of all the people-” she glanced through the door, where Camila is staring slack jawed at King, who was pointing intensely at a drawing in one of his demon books, animatedly speaking over Hooty, who seemed to have made a home around her shoulders. Surprisingly, Camila seemed less concerned with this part, or maybe she was trying to ignore it, the same way she did sometimes when Luz would say something a little too out there. At this point, she really couldn’t tell.

Maybe that was a good thing.

“So you smudged the truth a little bit, we’ve all done it. Heck, I do it all the time,” Eda snorted. “Look, you’ve got two options. Either you can run off again, maybe to one of your friends’ houses for the night and let King and I keep her busy.” She pictured slipping away to Willow’s for the night and letting Eda deal with this in the meantime. A wave of guilt washed over her almost immediately at the thought. Stupid conscience.

“Or,” Eda continued. “You can go out there and talk to her. Lady just found out her daughter lied to her for a month and spent the last twenty four hours thinking you were- poof! Gone. The least you can do is let her know you’re alright.” She pushed off the counter and shrugged, turning toward the door. “But hey, do what you need to. You know I’ll help out either way.”

With that, Eda headed into the living room to slump next to Camila and finally pull King away. She watched Camila’s shoulders relax just a bit at something Eda said. The look makes the lump that had been forming in Luz’s throat for the past hour begin to harden. She had always wanted to tell her mom, eventually. Preferably after she came home, safe and sound, and could prove that no, actually, it wasn’t dangerous at all Mom and that she arguably learned ten times as much on the Boiling Isles than she would have at camp.

Now-

Life was never supposed to go this way.

With a heavy sigh, Luz took a final glance toward the open door- if she ran, she could get to Willow’s by dark- and took the first step into the living room.

“You discover a magic door in the one place that I’ve spent years telling you not to go to, chasing after an owl that stole the book you just threw away, and decided that staying with the strange witch you just met- no offense, ma’am- all because you thought it sounded slightly better than camp? Not to mention giving me a heart attack in the process.”

She was taking this...far better than Luz thought she would. Her mom had never been one prone to yelling. Still, Luz had expected at least a small outburst this time. Yet, Camila had sat patiently through her explanation, waiting until the end to say much of anything. Eda had interjected a few times- the two of them got along surprisingly well, she was noticing- but for the most part, Luz had filled the silence for the past hour, catching Camila up on everything she had missed, or in some cases, adding new context to some of the messages she had sent over the course of the summer.

“Didn’t you kind of do the same thing just now? Same owl, same door…”

Over Camila’s shoulder, King cut a frantic hand over his throat, abort, abort, he tried to say, too little too late. If Luz wanted to back out, she should have done that weeks ago. Now that she was in, she may as well go all the way.

Camila blanched at that, “To find you. You’re the only kid I know that would leap through magic portals at the first opportunity. I should have figured sooner. Those messages were so vague, and the letters-”

Letters?

She could come back to that one later. For now-

“I’d do it again,” she said quietly.

Across from her, Camila stops in her tracks, brows burrowing deep into her eye line. “What?”

Even Eda glanced up at that, unsurprised, while an odd expression played on her face. Both of them remained quiet, waiting for her to continue. King however, took the chance to run across the floor and clamber into her lap. One hand lifted to scratch between his ears as she continued.

“I’d do it again,” she repeated. “Mom, I’m sorry. I know this isn’t what you wanted, but- I can’t be the person you want me to be. Not then, not now. I’m happy here, happier than I ever was at school or camp. I can’t go back to feeling like that all the time, like I don’t belong or knowing that no one understands. I won’t. The people here,” she thinks of Willow and Gus and Amity. King and Eda. “They understand. They all know what it’s like not to fit in. I can’t want to lose that.”

King burrows deeper into her lap, sending a wave of comfort through her skin. He’ll want to talk about it later tonight, before bed, the way they usually do when things go wrong during the day. Assuming she was still here tonight, that is.

Her mom was frowning, then suddenly, she was crossing the space between them and wrapping her arms around Luz, tight as can be and whispering under her breath, “Te quiero,” to Luz or herself, she isn’t sure.

After a moment, she draws back, hands still on Luz’s shoulders, the telltale flood of tears in her eyes. “When I realized you never made it to camp, the only thing I could think of was that I wished I had never let you leave. You were so far away and I couldn’t find you. I would have searched everywhere for you- even another dimension.” She hugs her again, hard. “I can’t lose you, not again.”

Luz’s heart stuttered in her chest, the same way it did every time they had spoken in the past weeks. Only this time, she didn’t hold back. Her arms wrapped tight around her mom’s middle to squeeze as hard as she could muster. Between them, King squeaks indignantly and bolts back toward Eda. Her nose was buried deep into the scrubs Camila must never have changed out of before stumbling upon the door. She smelled like chemicals and antiseptic and home. Her other home, now.

When they finally pulled back, tears are tracking down Camila’s cheeks, mirroring the ones Luz can feel on her own face.

“You’re happy here, aren’t you?” Camila glanced around. She takes in King and Eda, Hooty still twisting nervously in the corner. The odds and ends stacked along the walls. Luz.

She nodded once to herself, seemed to reach a decision. She stood. “Okay.”

“...Okay?”

Camila glanced to Luz, to Eda, then back to Luz. “You can stay,” she said, finally. “For the summer. But it’s back to school in the fall. If Miss Eda is okay with it, that is.”

Eda shrugs, “Meh, kid’s kind of grown on me.”

“And,” Camila added. “I’m staying, too.”

Luz’s feet send her shooting up before she entirely realized what was happening. “You’re what?”

“When I can, of course. I’ll still have work during the day and a house to look after. But I’ll be around, as often as I can.” Camila glanced around again. This time, Luz couldn’t tell if she was judging the place or mentally mapping out where she could fit herself into both the house and the dynamic. When she spoke again, her voice was softer than Luz expected to hear it today. “If this is important to you, I want it to be important to me, too.”

The words alone are enough to send Luz flying if she let them. She hadn’t expected it to go this well, much less be able to stay. And having her around? Able to finally see the things Luz loved, in a setting where her interests were encouraged- the norm, even. The lump from before had finally begun to dissolve, trickling down her throat and rising up again in the form of a happy shout.

She leaned forward to wrap her arms around Camila again, this time dragging Eda forward as well as she muttered confusedly under her breath. At their feet, she felt King’s claws tap against her ankles as he followed suit.

“Thank-you-thank-you-thank-you.”

When they pulled away, Camila turned to her, eyes serious. “From now on, I need you to be honest with me. No matter what, do you understand? No more running off without telling me, no more secret magic shows; honesty from here on out. And I’ll do my best to understand all... this.”

A laugh bubbled up from deep in her stomach, “deal.”

In the end, Camila wound up spending the night and calling in to work the next morning. Luz spent most of the evening and a good portion of the night delving into what she had seen so far on the Isles, including Willow and Gus, the Blights, Hexside. She activated the few spells she knew, as well, sending bursts of light into the air while Eda sits back, demonstrating the way they were typically cast.

It was odd, seeing her mom so relaxed. She had changed from her scrubs to one of Eda’s old shirts that read fabulous and flawless in sprawling pink font across the front and a pair of her old sweats. In the future, they were hoping to have a more long term setup for the times she stayed over. Which made Luz question why she had gotten the upstairs closet the whole time- but she would deal with that later.

Right now, she was willing to keep drawing up her spells and finally getting to show off to someone as amazed as her at the process. There was still more to talk about, like going to Hexside and Eda’s curse. Both of which were likely to cause ripples in the future, but for now, Luz was content to share the world she had fallen in love with, with the only person from home that mattered.

For now, Luz dragged her pencil across the page and let the light rise up between them.

#the owl house #lydsfics #luz noceda #camila noceda #did not expect two crank out 2k words tonight but here we are #I'm having a lot of fun with this though

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lilacyennefer · 4 years

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Hurricane — Part 8

A/N: I'm sorry it took me this long to post this chapter, but I kinda stuck with it and I didn't know how to write what I wanted. Anyway, the story will get a lot more exciting very soon and I'm excited about this! I hope you guys enjoy it :)

TW: language, mention of wounds, some angst

“Since we are married now, you know what we have to do, right?” Jax asks as you get back to Charming, and stepping into your home.

“Tell your mother that his only child got married without her knowledge?” you ask and Jax gives you a look.

“No, I mean, yes, but that’s not what I wanted to say.” Jax wraps his arms around your hips, pulling you close to him.

“A tattoo.” he says and you look at him confused.

“A tattoo, Why would I need a- oohhh!” You’re officially Jax’s Old Lady which means you have to get his crow tattooed.

“Alright. Where and when should I get it?” You ask Jax and he smirks.

“I know where.” He says and you feel him grab your ass cheeks.

“No.” You shake your head with a smile. “It would be hot actually, but no.” Jax pouts playfully and you laugh a little at his expression.

“On a serious note, you should get it where you want it.” Jax says and you eye him suspiciously.

“Where’s the second place you’d like to see it?” You ask him, it’s his crow tattoo after all, but you also don’t want to have such a permanent thing on you in a place you don’t like. You feel his hand move from your ass to your shoulder. He traces his finger over your shoulder blade and smiles at you lovingly.

“I love this place.” Jax whispers and you nod lightly in response. He really does love this place, everytime Jax is behind you for some reason, either just passing behind you in the kitchen or fucking you from behind, he always placed a kiss on that place.

“I like the idea.” You smile at Jax. He smiles back at you and cups your face and leans down to kiss you passionately.

“Alright. I’m gonna call Happy to get ready for tattooing you.” Jax says after breaking the kiss.

“No way! I like Happy but there's NO WAY I’ll let him near me with anything that could hurt me.” You really do like Happy, but also he scares you.

“Okay.” Jax laughs “We're gonna go to a tattoo shop.”

“As we should.” you nod with a smile.

One and a half hours later you’re standing in the local tattoo shop getting ready to get Jax's crow tattooed. The design is beautiful, you really love it, and you can feel your heart swell from the love and happiness.

“I never thought I’m gonna be someone's Old Lady and get a crow tattooed.” you tell Jax and he looks at you, you can see him try to read your expression and the tone of your voice.

“You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.” Jax says honestly and you shake your head with a smile.

“That’s not why I said it. This is not really how I planned my life, but I didn’t regret it.” Jax nods and kisses your forehead softly.

“Alright, let’s get this tattoo.” Jax says and you sit down in the chair.

“So, it’s time, huh?” you ask Jax as you step out of the tattoo shop, headed towards his bike.

“Yeah.” he says nervously and he gives you your helmet. “Just leave the talking to me.” You don’t argue with that, you’d rather let Jax talk to Gemma about your marriage since you know how much Gemma loves Jax, and well, she doesn’t love you that much, that’s sure. Your relationship with Gemma wasn’t an easy one, she didn’t hate you, but she certainly had doubts about you, and she wasn’t afraid to make sure you know that. But also, there were times when she told you how happy she is that you were with Jax, and what a good Old Lady you make. When you arrive at the Clubhouse you see Gemma’s car parked so you know she’s here, you feel your stomach turn in an unpleasant way as you get more and more nervous. You see her walk out of the office and she smiles at you and Jax. You feel Jax’s hand on your lower back as you walk towards Gemma, and when you turn to look at him, he gives you a confident nod.

“Hi sweetheart.” Gemma greets his son and she turns towards you with a smile “Tate.”

“Hi Gemma.” you say in a high pitched noise and you see Gemma look at you curiously.

“Mom can we talk to you for a second?” Jax asks and Gemma nods, inviting both of you into the office.

“What’s wrong?” she asks immediately, her eyes are suspiciously eyeing you. You stand here nervously, hands in your pocket and you look at Jax, then to the ground.

“Tate and I got married in Vegas.” Jax says and you squeeze your eyes shut, waiting for Gemma’s rage to hit both of you.

“You gotta be kidding me.” Gemma says angrily. “What the fuck you got my son into?” she turns towards you angrily.

“It wasn’t my idea, Gemma.” you try to say it as calmly as you can.

“Mom, leave her alone! It was my idea, she has nothing to do with it.” Jax says with a raised voice.

“Bullshit! You’re telling me that you got married and she didn’t have anything to do with it?”

“I asked her to marry me, it was my idea. All Tate did was say yes.” Jax says, his voice is still louder than his usual tone. Gemma doesn’t say anything, she’s just watching the two of you angrily.

“Gemma” you start, but she stops you.

“Don’t! I don’t want to hear any words from you!”

“Mom” It’s Jax’s time now to start talking and getting stopped by Gemma.

“No! Don’t you dare to tell me to calm down! I know this is what you tried to tell me, but don’t you dare! You’re my only son who got married behind my back! I have every right to be angry!” Gemma yells, then you hear someone open the door and step in.

“What the hell is going on? What is this yelling?” Clay demands as he’s closing the door behind himself.

“These two shitheads got married in Vegas without telling me!” Gemma explains angrily. You look at Clay who’s eyeing the two of you. Your relationship with Clay is also not an easy one, the two of you are not really fond of each other. You not once talked about how much you don’t like the club doing the gun business, you had your brother and now husband at risk because of that, and Clay knew about this, hence this, he didn’t like you much, although he never said it, but you certainly can feel it.

“Well fuck, congratulations kid.” Clay says and hugs both of you.

“Really?” Gemma yells at Clay.

“I know this hurts you, but you can’t change it. Or you want them to divorce?” You see Gemma shift her weight from one leg to her other.

“Well...no.” she says slowly.

“I’m pretty sure they regretted not telling you.” Clay continues.

“We did.” both you and Jax agree. Gemma keeps eyeing the two of you, then she slowly nods.

“Fine, but this doesn’t mean that I’m not upset about it.”

“Alright, let’s tell the rest of the club so we can celebrate properly.” Clay says as he’s walking out the door. You and Jax follow him, and you walk into the clubhouse where the members are. Jax tells the club about your marriage and suddenly everyone is yelling their congratulations and they go up to hug you and Jax. Your brother took the news better than Gemma did, he was more understanding and more happy for you. You spent the rest of the day at the clubhouse, celebrating your marriage with the club. The whole time Jax had his arm wrapped around you, holding you close, kissing you passionately. During the whole night, you felt Gemma and Clay’s stare on your back, unaware what they’re planning against you.

You’re parking your car in front of your home after a long day at work, Jax’s bike is nowhere to be seen. He’s probably busy with the club, you think as you walk into your empty house. You immediately walk to the bathroom, taking your clothes off as you start a hot shower and stand under it for a long time. You’re too tired to do anything after your shower so you go and lay down in the bed in your robe, falling asleep. You don’t know how long you’ve been asleep before you wake up to a loud noise coming from the house. You sit up scared, reaching for the gun when you see Jax stumbling in the corridor. You whisper his name and get out of the bed, rushing to help him.

“I’m fine.” he mutters when you reach him.

“What the fuck happened?” you asked, worried.

“Shit happened during a delivery.” he replies as you lead him to the bathroom. You frown, but tell him to sit down on the chair so you can check how bad his injuries are. There are some bruises on his face, and a bigger cut on his left side what you need to stitch up.

“Do you still find me handsome?” Jax jokes as you clean the wounds on his face. You don’t smile or reply, you just give him a stern look.

“I hate this.” you say. “Not taking care of you, I like to do that, but I wish I didn’t have to stitch you or any other member up so frequently.”

“I know, but this is how this life is.” Jax explains, and you shake your head.

“You know it doesn’t have to be like this! I’m sure there’s a way to earn straight.” you say and Jax sighs.

“I don’t have the energy for this right now. We discussed this, several times.”

“Is that so bad that I don’t want my husband and brother to end up in jail? Or worse?” you ask angrily.

“No.” Jax says slowly “But even if I could find a way, Clay would never let it happen.”

“Fuck Clay! He has nothing to lose! I’m pretty sure that man doesn’t have any feelings.”

“I know you don’t like him, but that’s not entirely true.”

“Oh don’t tell me you suddenly love him endlessly, Jax.”

“No, but my mother does, and my mother is important to me.” he sighs “Tate, please, leave this. I don’t want to fight tonight, nor any other time actually.” It’s your turn now to let out a sigh, but you agree with him.

“Fine, let me finish this so we can go to sleep.” you say and you keep taking care of his wounds.

Tag list: @innerpaperexpertcloud @lady-evans @agirllovespasta @claudiahxrdy @mheart27 @oldstuffnewstuff (message me if you want to get tagged)

#charlie hunnam #jax teller #jax teller x reader #jax teller fanfiction #hurricane part 8

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sternenteile · 4 years

Text

★ nostalgia.

the snow falling eternally in the shiver region always had the warmest sense of comfort, an ironic thought for a place so brutally cold. it seems that much hasn’t changed. the far reaches of the galaxy and beyond are easily worse, so perhaps this specific location was chosen (by whom?) with reason to raise precocious star children. the aurora borealis dancing above him brings his mind to the star pieces keeping the haven afloat, similar to, yet not the same as, the very ones he had to gather to restore the star road. it is a poignant reminder that this is a sign of things to come for the little ones here, himself included once upon a time. it’s funny to think back on how he daydreamed of his ascension and what it would be like to meet the elder star spirits, oblivious to the jaded star he’d grow to become in present day. sometimes, it’s better not to meet your heroes. it’s not like he had a choice in the matter, though.

not everything here, however, rekindles a bad memory. there is plenty of good to be unearthed, as well, and that is the whole reason why he’s here. a shaman descended from long-gone ancients would surely live a long, busy life, but... how is merle faring? judging from rosalina’s prior remarks, he must still be alive and well, but who knows how much age has taken its toll on him by now? it’s only been, oh, hundreds of years.

geno grimaces. she’d assured him that he would remember who he is, but —— no pun intended —— he’s beginning to have cold feet.

the reception he gets upon stepping foot into the valley is not that of resistance, surprisingly. whilst many a star child whipped ‘round to spot their new visitor, they quickly ease, as though knowing what kind of being he is. the hushed whispers amongst themselves only continues to drive in the fact that they’re aware of his not being a typical visitor. after all, starborn valley is secluded and guarded, and for someone radiating cosmic power as strongly as he, it’s no surprise that they’d pick up on it. they may be young and reckless, but they are by no means dumb.

he swallows thickly and waves at a nearby ninji, the robed little friend craning their head in confusion. they are unable to understand what he is by first glance, but it is with explanation and a display of star magic sparkling within his palm that all ambiguity is lost. the ninji hurriedly scurries over to merle’s, beckoning for geno to follow. bobbing star kids follow close behind, eagerly waiting to eavesdrop on the juicy new gossip. a visitor, a visitor! a visitor is here!

steeling himself, he reaches his fist to the door. pulling back slightly, he has a bout or two of reconsidering everything before finally giving it a knock. standing back with arms wrapped ‘round himself —— not from cold, but an innermost chill incomparable —— he waits, each second feeling like hours.

the door creaks open with care. the first thing he notes is that merle looks almost no different from the last time he’d seen him. the only real change is a thinning and lengthening of his mustache, slowly, but surely beginning to rival even merlon’s. his garb is familiar, yet worn with age, and those glowing green eyes are kind and paternal as ever. geno releases a visible breath of air that he hadn’t realized he was holding in. it’s been way too long.

he’s petrified, to be frank. his only manner of greeting initially is a meek wave, a nervous smile displaying the gripping fear making his legs feel like pillars of sand. ❝ um... hello. ❞ perhaps it is worrying over not being remembered, or maybe it’s the fussing towards himself to not speak out of turn, as if talking to eldstar himself. it may also be that discerning and flummoxed gaze he’s being given, brows taut pensively —— but realization strikes merle’s face, and geno feels as though he could collapse right there.

❝ my little starlight, ❞ comes the coarse, sweet coo from his old voice. it is so difficult to tell his expression through the shadow of his being, but geno swears he can see his old guardian’s face contort from a smile. ❝ it’s... it’s you! at last... as i predicted, you’ve come back home. i knew that you would! ❞ before even being able to get a word in edgewise, before even beginning to ponder over what the wise old man meant, geno finds himself enveloped in a hug, one that forces a strangled gasp from him —— pleasant surprise.

it’s like the rest of the world stops turning as his hands grip at the robes covering merle’s back, shoulders quaking. his nose buries into his shoulder, and he recalls his scent. it’s like cinnamon, hot cocoa, and aged wood. he forgets how much he actually missed that. the chattering of the baby stars behind him may as well not exist.

❝ y— you remember, ❞ stammers the wayward spirit. he can’t help but be a little misty-eyed. who wouldn’t be? ❝ merle... ❞

- ★ -

❝ ... and what a fine star you’ve grown up to be, as well! ❞ geno glances up from his warm mug of hot chocolate, marshmallow splatter comically dotting the tip of his nose. merle’s words are the polar opposite of eldstar’s, so friendly and full of praise. ❝ you’ve come very far, starlight. from the rambunctious child zipping through the woods, ❞ a memory that makes poor geno’s cheeks flush, ❝ to head sentry of the star road. i was sure that you had it in you; i’m very proud that i was right. ❞

hands grip the cup as if it’s a lifeline as the star gratefully responds, ❝ thank you. i was... hoping i wouldn’t disappoint. ❞

a guffaw from the jolly old sort unravels his poor nerves. ❝ what would ever give you the idea that you would disappoint? certainly, you are heralded among your kind for your heroics! my regards to eldstar, by the way, ❞ merle adds with another sip of his drink. what he says next sends geno’s stomach plummeting. ❝ i’m sure he has plenty of good to say of you, as well. i can imagine they all dote on you endlessly. ❞

his jaw’s hinges are loose, hanging. uncertain gaze falls to the surface of the drink, to the melting marshmallows, and his mouth clamps back shut. hah. that would be the day. how oddly shy he feels in front of someone so important to starkind leaves him silent, responding only with a dismal shake of the head. when eyes lift again, all that can be found written on merle’s expression is disappointment. he thinks it must come as a shock to him to find that his efforts have not been duly noted, but when merle resigns with a sigh to his child’s fate, geno is puzzled.

❝ i... figured as much. ❞ merle’s fingertips drum along the ceramic cup, downcast. ❝ much to my chagrin, i knew that the incident would have changed them, for better or for worse. ❞

that brings geno’s brows flying upward. ❝ ‘the incident’? what in spores—— ❞ no speaking out of line. his back stiffens. ❝ i— i’m terribly sorry—— may i ask what this incident you speak of is, merle? ❞

the exaggerated formality in his speech receives a look of disapproval, but not for the reasons he’d expected, for merle ensures, ❝ starlight... or, no, it is ‘geno’ that you go by now, yes? please relax. you’re at home here. do— or say— whatever you please. ❞

shoulders sag, and geno gives a drawn-out groan. resting his chin on the table and spreading arms ‘cross it, he bemoans, ❝ oh, thank grambi. i thought i was in for another freakin—— another lecture. ❞ the laugh he hears across from him is plenty to reassure him that this isn’t anywhere in his near future.

❝ oh, no. pray tell, is that what you experience often while you’re up there? ❞

geno scowls, blowing upward at the curls trying to fall into his eye. ❝ you don’t even know the half of it. every day is just another day of doing something wrong. ❞

merle falls silent. from his getting lost in the sea of his drink, geno can only surmise that he’s ruminating about something —— and that is confirmed not long after. ❝ i understand that it is hard to... but don’t hold it against them too much. ❞ before a rebuttal can be issued, merle continues. ❝ you wanted to know about the incident i mentioned, yes? i have to say, i’m amazed that you haven’t heard of it sooner. does your mother not know? or... ❞

he shakes his head, and geno leans forward, interest piqued. ❝ did you ever find out what happened to the head sentry before you? the one that descended to earth many moons ago? i fear they may still have some... troublesome feelings after the matter. ❞

geno can’t even think of his cocoa anymore, even if the stuff goes ice-cold. ❝ i know that they disappeared, but i never knew why. i just thought—— maybe they’d another role to fulfill somewhere else? ❞

❝ alas, ❞ denies merle, ❝ that would have been an easier tale to stomach. that star was something special, i must say. he was just as vibrant as you, if i may compare. he loved humanity, and he wanted to be among them. ❞ that sounds very familiar. ❝ one day, he asked the council if he could live on earth once again, this time outside of the starborn valley he was raised in. they were hesitant, but their restrictions were surprisingly lax. after all, if it made their precious one happy, then who were they to deny him his right to his own life? they loved him so dearly. they were hardly ever apart. they even began to wonder if it was time to open a spot for an eighth presence in the star sanctuary. it was quite phenomenal. no one ever heard the end of it. ‘starlight granted so many wishes tonight, all on his own. we couldn’t be happier with the turn-out——’ ❞

the cute nickname they’d all coined for ease of referring to geno in english —— rather than the archaic star language they attempted to phase out —— makes his head snap upward, flustered. ❝ what? ❞

merle gives a shrug. ❝ that was the last one before you. they were one of the first to be given a name not in your star language. the distance between earth and star haven was growing ever shorter, and to mingle with mortal beings below, they felt it best to integrate. they feared that starlight —— not you, my child —— was moving a little too fast, but they hadn’t the heart to tell him no. they loved him too much to turn him away. they spoiled him rotten. they’d gotten very attached...

❝ — which is why, when he one day did not return to the star road, the seven star spirits were concerned. he had a duty to fulfill, and it was not like him to abandon his station entirely. the next week passed with no word, no matter how much they tried, and they feared the worst. they could handle the star road just fine, but the idea of losing their precious starlight tore them apart. another week went by before they finally received word from their earthly spirits, the star sprites. ❞

what geno is told next makes him feel sick. ❝ they watched over his final moments as himself. he was eager to make discoveries with his new friends in monstro town. he remained for longer and longer... and he began to change. he suddenly felt freedom like none else, and he resented the idea of returning to the stars. the star sprites discouraged him from talking to eldstar about it, and the argument was monumental. he was their head sentry, and he was needed, but... he was also immature, i’m afraid. he wanted to be down here, and nothing was going to stop him. his time of granting wishes was over, and in a fit of rage, he lashed out at the sprites. before they knew it, darkness swallowed him whole... leaving naught but a threatening dark star behind. ❞

his mouth is dry, his body rigid as merle wraps up his explanation. ❝ they sealed him in the depths of the planet. the seven spirits begged for him to return, to be released and cured from whatever corruption had overtaken him, but there was no use. the star left behind wasn’t even the same star any longer. torn between his two homes, the star essentially died that day, and all that was left was the remains of his anger. a dark star is an embodiment of all negativity contained within a star’s core. the rest of the star’s identity is not to be preserved. all of it is wiped from existence. they lost their most precious little one to corruption. we theorize that it may have happened because he’d not matured enough to handle what all was on his plate... or it could have been something entirely different. ❞

it makes sense. as much as geno wants to deny it and feel that they’re wrong for changing due to grief, he can’t imagine the devastating effect it would have on him to lose those most precious to him. surely, he himself would change, too.

❝ uh... wow. ❞ frankly, he’s at a loss for words. merle seems to be gauging his reaction to the tragic tale, and really, it’s indiscernible. even geno himself can’t figure out how he feels about this. that’s when a light switch goes off, and it all goes back to the moniker they gave him all those years ago.

❝ when they assigned me to the star road, it must have been with purpose, but then—— ❞ his brows furrow. ❝ why give me a name in our native tongue when they were trying to eradicate that? too many bad memories? then why give me the same dumb pet name they gave the last one? am i just a replacement or something? is that why they’re always on top of me? ❞

merle insistently shakes his head. ❝ my best guess is that they don’t want to see you go down the same path. truthfully, i thought that you would behave similarly, ❞ the idea of that making geno’s heart drop, ❝ but that it would possibly end differently. i’d consulted with the rest of my family, and they all seemed to agree. i felt it wrong not to trust you and your instincts... and it seems i made the right choice. you are here, yet you are you. you have proven to me that you are not going to allow your morals to slip so easily. you matured. as for your elders, i... i’m afraid i can’t speak for them. i cannot be sure how much or how little they feel you will meet the same fate. ❞

merle notices the sag of geno’s shoulders, the way he curls in on himself, the way he almost looks betrayed. he hurries around the table to hold him, and while it is instinctively returned, his mind is far, far away.

❝ — but know this: i believe in you. i knew you would come very far, and you’ve exceeded my expectations. i hope they wake up and realize this, as well. you’ve made many friends and happy memories. you’ve fought for so long. i hope my intuitions are correct that they are prouder of you than you may think... but even if not, i always will be, and so will your mother. do you understand? ❞

even as geno nods with a sound of understanding, he can’t help but wonder if he really does get it, let alone if he ever will. it’s so much to take in at once. they don’t trust him. why? he isn’t the last one. he’s a different star. why do they treat him as if he’s already too far gone?

maybe— he’ll never truly know.

#★ ; ( ic. )#● ; ( prose. )#♫ ; ( verse ~ the present. )#warning for a LONG ASS read.#some heavy shit in here too.#death cw particularly.#not all is as it seems.#there ya have it. my final thing for yall b4 this storm hits LMAO

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