#This has taken me about three hours to compile at least

[blueheartedmayor]

Sure, things have been quiet for personal reasons lately, but this blog is more than just a resource for people. There's been a bunch of things that have happened over FIVE WHOLE years. I've had so many fun threads, dynamics I've been so invested in, and that's not mentioning the amount of changes to my mayor and my 'Dark' while trying to figure out how to write a pair I was comfortable with. If I tried to make a list of everything, I can guarantee I'd forget something. (Luckily I found this post that sums up my sentiments on that)

But this isn't about any of that! This masterpost is dedicated to things I've really loved on the blog in no particular order. This ranges from silly events, to memorable posts, to anything else that makes me smile.

Since this is a special weekend, there shall be NO read-more. >:D

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First thing: you need to remember that Damien, regardless of the verse I write him in, is TEAM MOM.

Second thing: Damien has been a mayor for a long time.

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Damien is a very good dad. I think that goes without question. He's encountered many characters over the years that he's taken under his wing, whether as a parental figure, a guardian/uncle, or the unlucky human who has to deal with a non-human being. (There's so many good examples I'd be here for another hour trying to find links to them all)

Damien can swear.

On two different occasions, Damien has drawn every single Dark he knew at that moment. This was the first, a few months after the blog was set up; and the second, done roughly a year later (featuring Wilf).

Speaking of Wilf, did you know I first wrote William here? It's true! I had two events. The first was my 2018 April Fools event. Then, a few weeks later, people wanted him back, so he spent a day hanging out with Damien and answering a few questions. Ultimately, that had me set up Will's own blog in June (but Wilf took over about three days in).

If you need some silliness, don't forget about our beloved Mayur Daniem!!

Waaaay back at the start of the blog, Damien had a verse where he was a ghost that comprised part of another Dark. Despite what that would imply, he was actually extremely dorky, finding some sort of light within the darkness (and encouraging the non-rp blogs to join the chaos too).

Damien has no idea what's going on. He's the last to know about everything.

One time, Damien managed to insult every single Dark he knew at the time. They all popped out of the woodwork to object, and it was very funny, until there was a bit of sads. ^ However! I should give a warning!! A lot of this focuses on a long-dead ship Damien had with a Dark. They aren't the same person, and the implication was timeline crossover hijinks (with the mun eventually tweaking the lore to not be connected to W.KM)

But in better news about Darks, Dante has gone through a lot of work! Way back in the day, he was a repulsive character I called Snake (and he still exists in the form of Dante 'In Character'). Then, I had a chance to change things

Roses are red, my number is five...

I had this blog when the calendar was announced. You know, that calendar. I was barely writing two months when we discovered naked mayor month was a thing. People had great fun making fun of Damien. (As an aside, don't worry! There's nothing NSFW in this!)

This isn't mine, but if you ever need to spend an afternoon watching W.KM related stuff, pleaaaase go watch the musical. And if you need a massive long-term watching project, my friend compiled an ultimate masterpost of Mark's acting stuff!

If you've ever worried that Damien works too hard and really needs a break, we have you covered. A good friend of Damien's turned him into a M.ooshroom plushie.

Why does he work really hard? I mean, he's been mayor for a WHILE...

We have a tag dedicated to positive things, specially to help people find something to smile when they need it.

(speaking of tags, friendly reminder that I already have the post showing all the Damien tags!)

And how can I talk about positive things without mentioning Barnum? What people might not realise is that a lot of my time on the blog was paired with a heavy sense of stagnation. I didn't feel Damien was special or had anything going for him. Barnum didn't solve the problem, but it definitely helped me feel waay more settled about all of this.

I've got a tag dedicated to Damien deserving better. I've been an avid supporter of this for YEARS, hence the main verse.

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Finally, I have made a tag for any of my art pieces that 'escaped containment breach' and were noticed by a more general audience, since I accidentally rediscovered several have and that surprised me.

#I'm still on my five year anniversary kick! This is huge for me! #And I know a lot of things I enjoyed were lost to time for most people #but no one is allowed to reblog this post because most of this won't make sense beyond the usual crowd. Everything has links #This has taken me about three hours to compile at least #I got a little sidetracked skimming some things #and getting a bit nostalgic for things long passed; and for things I was more passionate about than the writing partner was #despite the ups and downs I've had; I've had a bunch of good memories. I didn't want to name names because I know I'd forget people #which would make me feel super guilty #point is. I'm really grateful for everything. Even if I haven't been the best of company for most people #(save)

[sunkissed-zegras]

Okay, so I’ve actually been thinking about this non-stop, but I’m no writer, so you’ll have to bear with me: Manager y/n, who is doing ‘research’ for the Paige edits, gets super into TikTok for like a week before they have to cut themselves off.

And during this week, they’re not just watching videos – no, they’re posting them. I’m talking like 5 a day MINIMUM. It all starts when they see the “who’s afraid of little old me” sound is trending and promptly post a slideshow, beginning with a soft, smile-filled picture of them with the team before “you should be” is sung out, and it cuts to a like 10-second compilation they had seen of them and the team screaming at refs or just looking super pissed off on the sidelines (as others have mentioned, the rbf is no joke).

Fans, of course, go crazy because, omg they’re posting on their account now? (It’s chalked up to KK’s influence.) And when their first video blows up, Manager y/n is officially hooked.

After seeing Paige’s Tru Fru video, they use the song to make an edit of them and the team using mostly unseen pictures and videos from the Europe trip to “I was over love and I’d had enough ‘till I found you”. It’s just so painfully sweet and a little bit sappy; people love it.

Things take a dramatic turn, though, when they discover thirst traps. NOW, they only post one, but one is enough to send people spiraling. “That’s my playpen, borderline thinking like Barbie.”

Lives are lost that day.

And the team’s reaction? Let's just say they've never hit the repost button faster. Paige has it saved and favorited in her camera roll, but you didn’t hear that from me.

“Now I’m down bad, crying at the gym” is posted to a video from when they tried to do the team’s conditioning day with them, and things didn’t go well. Manager y/n is strong, but this is a whole other level; they don’t even make it past the first hour before tears are shed. The whole team finds it hilarious (and it is).

KK gets them into dances too; there’s at least three posted to “Get it sexyy” before the day is done. And there’s soooo much more. “There must have been an angel by my side” is posted with Ice and Azzi. A “You know how to ball, I know Aristotle” ‘fit check with Paige goes triple platinum on the platform. And there are a perhaps unreasonable number of videos posted to “make her disappear just like poof, then she’s gone, addicted don’t know what the fuck I’m on” from a particularly fun night out (they had to take frantically down half of them when they woke up, but we won’t talk about that).

But perhaps the true pièce de résistance is ‘Man eater’. It was supposed to just be a ‘fit check after they got particularly dressed up for a team dinner/fundraiser but simply put, the people couldn’t take it. It took less than an hour for edits to start rolling in, and when some multiple people in their classes the next day (INCLUDING THEIR FAVORITE PROFESSOR) tells them they saw it , Manager y/n decided to take a step back (they can handle online attention, but in person is a whole different ball game).

After all, “we can’t have too many celebrities on this team.”

Last notes: This brief deep dive does dramatically affect the quality of the edits they make though; there was just so much inspiration to be taken (for research purposes only of course). 2 weeks after they stop posting on their personal account, a Paige and Nika hype edit to ‘Carnival’ is posted on the UConn page. They almost get in trouble for it, but they gain a couple of thousand followers and it quickly becomes the most liked video on their page. And who’s going to get mad at someone for what turns out to be a stroke of marketing genius (explicit lyrics be damned)?

THIS IS NOW MY FAV THING EVERTRR CUS YOURE SO SO SO RIGHT, i love the way u think nonnie

absolutely, and i feel like after the week is over she’s on the same level as paige — there are fan edits EVERYWHERE and manager is getting so much attention from everyone (ofc she doesn’t mind tho)

when she stops posting as much as she used to i can def see everyone begging for scraps 😭😭 they reuse the same 10 clips they have and the scraps they can find up until queen y/n posts again 😭😭

pls send more thoughts this was so much reading through it!

#uconn wbb manager thoughts 💭 #god i love this ask sm #paige bueckers

[axolotlclown]

My essay is completed

This bitch took me days. I got some fat points in here.

I would recommend the doc, as I worked very hard on the MLA format. But in case it decides not to work, here is a transcript of the essay. (also, sources in the doc for the stream i mentioned in the intro) :)

Generation Loss, The Social Experiments, and Its Commentary On the Relationships of the Modern Influencer

Generation Loss, “The Social Experiments”, created by RanbooLive explores the relationships between the modern content creator and the institutions they work for, their self-identity, as well as their audience. Generation Loss, an interactive comedy-horror production streamed live on Twitch, contains three episodes that make up “The Social Experiments” chapter. The series was created by RanbooLive, produced by JK Productions, managed by Ghost Commander Inc., and streamed onto the RanbooLive Twitch channel. The series follows Ranboo as they explore a production— streamed to a live audience— only to discover they were kidnapped and forced to remain a cast member. This wouldn’t be so bad, however, the show seems to take on heavy inspiration from the Saw franchise. 

“The Social Experiments” seems to have taken on after the creator’s own life. For example, in a behind-the-scenes tweet, we see a photo of a list titled, “OFFICE REGULATIONS”. This list includes additional information about the livelihood of the Showfall employees, as well as a straight-cut reference to a RanbooLive stream from 2020, in which he had listed reasons why he should be president of L’manburg (a country from the Dream SMP, a popular Minecraft roleplay server). This stream would serve to jumpstart RanbooLive’s career. 

The creator, RanbooLive— also known as Ranboo— began their career as a Twitch streamer on September 11th, 2020. During a time when everyone would rather stay inside, as a result of the Covid-19 virus, it did not take long for the RanbooLive Twitch channel to gain some attention. On November 27th, 2020, Ranboo had been invited to join the Dream SMP, a popular Minecraft roleplay server at the time. Seemingly overnight, Ranboo exploded in popularity. Freshly turned 17 years old (though, the audience would remain none the wiser), Ranboo skyrocketed to become the most subscribed person on Twitch. During this period, Ranboo preferred to keep their personal information private. Although Ranboo has opened up about some of these personal truths, he continues to keep their name and face anonymous. 

As their career progressed, he moved away from streaming Minecraft on Twitch and toward a variety of content. This would create an opportunity for a project as large as Generation Loss. When the first episode aired on May 24th, 2023, Ranboo would be 19 years old. With the mounting expectations, responsibilities, and stress, it comes as no surprise that a project of this scale would need a personal connection— a soul of its own— to have a chance at being successful. When the audience asked Ranboo: “What is the scariest thing that could happen to you?”, the answer was clear. 

The media in charge of producing the shows we see in “The Social Experiments” distinguishes themselves as ‘Showfall Media’. They produce the content that the viewers, as well as the characters, see and interact with. They are also responsible for the deaths we see on screen. Showfall seems to be a stand-in for a corporation— in this context, Twitch.

 In episode 3: “The Choice”, the streamers are depicted as being forced to stream. During this scene, we see that Slimecicle is reacting to a color compilation on a Twitch stream. This is the reality for a lot of streamers signed on as partners for Twitch. Twitch requires partnered streamers to stream at least 25 hours a month (these hours may be negotiable depending on the revenue the streamer brings to them). Streamers on the higher end may find themselves killing their creativity in an attempt to meet these requirements.

The media workers are also seen in “The Choice”. They are depicted as emotionless drones. They are seen to be sort of  ‘offline’ during times when there are not any shows. This is a commentary on how Twitch executives view their employees as machines. Later, we see a dead Showfall employee slumped against a mall map, bleeding; security had mauled them. Showfall has demonstrated that they would only kill those who attempt to defy them. The employees are very vulnerable to the decisions of the executives at the top. Their lives are just as much at stake as the streamers. When Ranboo finally breaks and attacks a worker, they do not bleed; they are made of wires. To the streamers, they are the same mindless machines that keep them trapped there. Humanity is ultimately lost. 

Snowfall has found that putting their streamers and actors in peril creates engagement. This is the plot of episode 2: “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”. Every streamer— except for Ranboo— dies at some point throughout the episode. The streamers, playing the roles of actors, are seen as disposable by Showfall. Though the viewer sees the exact actors return, this may be more of a metaphor about how replaceable they are— even Showfall can’t tell the difference. There will always be a new streamer available to take advantage of. This is especially true in the final scene of “The Choice”. Ranboo’s death is meant to resemble a crucifixion. This would imply that Ranboo is viewed as a sacrifice to Showfall. To them, it did not matter whether the viewer chose to let him live or die, they already got their views and engagement. Ranboo’s death was a cheap money grab. 

The tonal shifts throughout the three episodes exemplify the loss of innocence as the streamer grows. The first episode: “The Spirit of The Cabin”, carries a generally comedic tone. Although Ranboo is horrified and confused at their situation, it is difficult for the audience to understand what they are afraid of. This is because of the grandiosity of the presentation of the set, characters, and scenarios. This creates a much more goofy atmosphere than a creepy one. Because of Ranboo’s mind control, his behavior comes across as static and abnormal. It is difficult to relate to them. Overall, the audience spends more time laughing than cowering. These actors are not real. Death is not a real threat.

In “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”, there is a slight tone shift. In the first scene, Ranboo is not under any mind control. This leads to their delivery being more believable and relatable to the viewer. The further introduction of more realistic actors breathes realism into absurd scenarios. The comedic tone may remain for a few moments as the situation is still too extreme before the terror of the consequences begins to become known. Death is permanent now.

“The Choice” intends to fill the viewer with dread. Ranboo has complete control now, leading to their character, and their problems, being completely relatable to the viewer. The fear derived here does not come from cheap jumpscares, nor is the scenery particularly decrepit. The fear comes from circumstance. Showfall has become too real. The audience understands how this will end, no matter how much they want it to be any different. There is no true exit. Once the viewer arrives at the ending, their fears become just as real as the show. The threat of death becomes a guarantee. 

These shifts originate from the progression a young streamer may go through as they grow. In the final scene of “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”, Ranboo becomes aware of the horrors of the system he’s found himself trapped in. This is that wake-up moment a streamer may have, exaggerated at a young age. At this moment, Ranboo realizes their childhood is over. 

The character Slimecicle, also referred to as Charlie, displays traits that may indicate that he was taken by Showfall as a child. In “The Spirit of The Cabin”, Charlie refuses to eat unless Ranboo would make airplane noises as he feeds him. This is behavior that would typically be displayed by a baby. The basement in this episode is filled with children's toys— presumably owned by Charlie, as the bedroom is confirmed to be his. In “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”, Charlie shows showing behaviors of a teenager. He is generally unbothered by the horrifying situation that he finds himself in. This may also demonstrate how this torture is something that Charlie is accustomed to. By “The Choice”, Charlie begins to behave as an adult. Charlie was likely taken by Showfall Media as a baby and raised within the system. As a young streamer, ‘torture’ is something that becomes a truth about life.

“The Social Experiments” also reveals the thin separation between the facade put on for entertainment and the authentic person. This is a large plot point in “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”. During a scene, there is a large carousel with five streamers plus Frank (a plastic skeleton). Ranboo and the audience must each choose to pick one streamer to survive. The streamers must justify why Ranboo and the audience may decide to pick them. This would mean that they must appeal to the facade that they have created— which would have been historically successful.

One streamer, Sneegsnag, immediately plays a bit that he needs to use the bathroom. This is a reference to how viewers may know him as ‘the fart guy’, a common inside joke between the real streamer and his audience. After attempting to escape, he is returned to the carousel and promptly brainwashed. He begins to take on a much more calm persona. He doesn’t seem to be bothered about whether or not he dies— he is unbothered by the viewers' decision. Sneegsnag takes on the facade that the greater viewers know him for, being the ‘chill guy’.

Another streamer, Nihachu (also known as Niki), is hysterically sobbing out of fear for her life. Upon introducing herself, she snaps out of her tears and rambles about ‘how nice she is’. This is a reflection on how the audience only sees her as either the crying overdramatic one or the really nice one. Both ignore the fact that she is about to die. Both Sneegsnag and Niki are chosen.

Later in the same episode, we see a ‘fashion room’. The streamers believe that to proceed, they must alter their appearance. This being their first instinct, may indicate how natural it is to constantly alter the facade that they regularly put on. This was ultimately unsuccessful. If they don’t present themselves in a way the viewers want to see, they cannot move on.

In the final scene of this episode, Ranboo becomes aware of the show they’ve been forced to partake in. Leaning over the rail of Showfall Media’s place of operation, Ranboo mumbles to themselves, “What the fuck? What the fuck is this place?”. This is not only the first time the viewers hear this character swear, but it is the first time RanbooLive has ever sworn on camera. This scene drives a wedge between the facade that Ranboo has worked hard to keep up and the real Ranboo behind the screen. It also serves as a wake-up call to the viewer that what is happening is much more real than they are comfortable with.

A prominent part of Ranboo’s character is the large metal mask that they wear. Masks traditionally represent shielding one’s humanity. While that is part of the story, it doesn’t paint the full picture. Showfall uses this mask to control him, and Hetch later uses it to speak to him. In the first scene of “The Spirit of The Cabin”, Ranboo attempted to claw off the mask to no avail. The mask remains a burden on the character throughout the rest of the series through mind control. In “The Choice”, Hetch makes a promise to assist in Ranboo’s escape. Only after Ranboo has successfully left, can Hetch remove their mask. The mask remains something that Ranboo has awoken with, died with, and can never remove. It does rob Ranboo of their humanity. Showfall doesn’t see him as human— and neither does the viewer. What robs Ranboo of their humanity is the facade. The mask is the brand. To the viewer, it is the most jarring part of his character. It is the most important part.

During Ranboo’s final death scene, the mask is cracked. We see a sliver of humanity escape as they plead for death. The mask stays on during the execution. Ranboo is killed with a box that completely covers their face. At this moment, there is no brand. There is no facade or authentic self. There is nothing anymore. Ranboo was only free in death. The viewer never saw their true face.

The biggest theme throughout “The Social Experiments” is the loss of autonomy the streamers experience. Ranboo is unable to make any decisions for himself and relies on the audience to make them for them. In “The Choice”, Ranboo defies the audience when selecting a code to input into a computer. Because of this defiance, Ranboo is no longer able to proceed. Hetch disappears. Ranboo was not in Hetch’s best interest, it was the viewers. The ‘fashion room’ in “The Mastermind of The Warehouse” is a literal closet. Ranboo watches Austin and Ethan put on dresses, heels, and wigs while he only put on a jacket to replace the one he already had. The audience, as well as society, is not interested in queer expression. Ranboo cannot express themselves in the way that they would like out of fear of how the viewers would react. 

During the cooking segment in “The Spirit of The Cabin”, the audience discovers that Ranboo cannot cook. This is a direct reference to the popularity of cooking streams on Twitch. In particular, how cooking streams done by people who don’t know how to cook are more popular than those done by chefs. Viewers tune in to watch streamers fail at something that should be easy. Even if a streamer can cook, they gain more viewers if they pretend that they cannot. To ensure that Showfall acquires the views they desire, they make sure that Ranboo is given ingredients that do not make logical sense. The audience is led to believe that he will fail.

Returning to the carousel in “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”, no matter how well the streamers play into the facade, they have no control over the outcome. They cannot decide for themselves whether or not they can move forward. Only the audience, and Ranboo, can decide the streamers’ fates.

In “The Spirit of The Cabin”, Sneegsnag is trapped in a cage. He is unbothered by the situation he finds himself in. He has been doing this much longer than Ranboo. He is stuck with a plastic skeleton named Frank— whom only Sneegsnag can understand. In a behind-the-scenes tweet, we see a document that shows that Frank is a now-deceased person. Sneegsnag likely knew him before he had passed. Frank’s passing was likely the choice of the viewers, as that has been the only permanent death shown. Sneegsnag, at this point, has likely accepted the loss of control.

In “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”, Ranboo is forced to cut Charlie open to retrieve a key. He is told he must to survive. Ranboo apologizes but complies. Charlie seems generally unbothered; this has likely happened to him before. There may be pressure on streamers to have an ‘every man for himself’ mentality. If your friend becomes the target of criticism, is it worth it to defend them? After all, if Ranboo didn’t cut Charlie open, they may not have been able to solve the Mouse Trap puzzle. If Ranboo hadn’t attempted to rescue Charlie in “The Choice”, he may have been able to escape. 

The consequences of the streamers trying to take their autonomy back are made clear. In “The Mastermind of The Warehouse”, Niki goes off script in an attempt to investigate the Candy Room. She is killed. When Ranboo later becomes aware of the realization that they are trapped on a show, the horror starts to set in. The viewer sees how desolate the sets are. How empty the mall is. How dangerous it is to question the system. They see the truth. Did they ever regret it? Is this life worth it?

Ultimately, Ranboo is pinned up and a decision is made clear. They could either live and be forced to continue to entertain the masses at their own expense, or he could die. Except, Ranboo can’t make that decision; only the audience can. Upon the realization that these are his only two options, Ranboo begs the audience to kill them. Is it a commentary on cancel culture? Is it a commentary on depression and suicidal ideation? Does it matter? Aren’t the results the same?

It’s easy to want to envy a popular streamer’s life. They have money, attention, and a lot of friends. It may feel like their lives are a dream— the ultimate goal in life. All you have to do is play a video game, cook, or have an interesting conversation with no one. Who wouldn’t want such an easy life? This is not true.

When the audience chose to kill Ranboo in the final scene of “The Social Experiments”, that was the end of the story for this version of Ranboo. In real life, it is not. Ranboo lives reality as if the audience had chosen to let him live. These themes prevail in real life. The horrors of the loss of autonomy, loss of childhood innocence, loss of control over your own identity, and capitalism are all real. 

What now for the viewer? Will they be kinder? Will they begin to remember the very real humans behind the screen? Or are they just as much wires as the Showfall employees? Is this even worth it? Are they thinking the ‘every man for himself’ mentality, too? How far does it go? Maybe there is no escape. When Ranboo was asked, “What is the scariest thing that could happen to you?”, they answered: “It already happened.”

#I cannot emphasize enough how you shouldn't use rhetorical questions in your academic essays for school #I did them to fuck with you #which is why i'm allowed to do it #also don't use passive verbs #i just don't have the energy to fix it #and you probably won't notice anyway #but uh #yeah #i made some fat points #thoughts of dante #ranboo #ranboolive #generation loss #generation loss spoilers

[comradekatara]

what’s in the gaang’s youtube history 📺

aang likes videos of people doing impressive skateboard tricks, video game speedruns, heartwarming videos titled smth like "WATCH THIS TO HAVE YOUR FAITH IN HUMANITY RESTORED", unlikely animal friends, cats being silly, puppies running around, comedy sketches with high production value, and whatever else 12 year old boys watch on youtube (lego??? minecraft??? pokemon??? i .... don't actually know)

katara is addicted to youtube almost as much as she is addicted to twitter. she watches so many longass videos on social/political issues and then tweets the creators about how one hour and forty three minutes into the video they stated an opinion that she personally disagreed with, and she demands an apology. she also loves elaborate makeup tutorials that she would never even bother to attempt to replicate (but she likes to think that maybe one day if she gets invited to the met gala, she now has some looks to choose from)

sokka's youtube library is extremely eclectic. he can't stop clicking on videos titled shit like "intro to particle physics" just to watch the entire thing and be like "why did i watch this i knew all that already." but yknow. he just had to make sure. he's a big fan of chris fleming, and he's made all his friends watch "gigi the christmas snake" multiple times. he's gone down a lot of rabbitholes in his day, but his personal favorite side of youtube is the videos of chemical reactions, especially the ones that end in an explosion.

toph occasionally enjoys listening to longass video essays about obscure topics, but mostly she just listens to podcasts. she’s also partial to this one video that’s just the sound of a chainsaw revving on a 10 hour loop, and she plays it at just the right volume that her parents will be like “what’s that awful noise?” to which she innocently responds “i don’t hear anything” and they’re like “oh no you must be able to hear it, it’s so annoying” and toph’s like “are you sure? it sounds normal to me.” she tries this on katara once, but katara gets so frustrated that she just yells “oh wow didn’t realize you were blind AND deaf” and that leads them to get in a very violent brawl in which toph’s nose is nearly broken, so she decides to limit this particular gambit to the company of her parents only. 

zuko exclusively uses youtube to watch cute animal videos. otherwise, he's terrified he'll accidentally click on something that might potentially radicalize him, since he read somewhere that the algorithm was designed to do that, or worse, direct him to one of those content farm generated animations of elsa getting a c section, which is apparently also a concern. frankly, the internet scares him, and he tries to avoid it as much as possible.

suki watches npr tiny desks, kexp live, lofi hip hop anime beats to relax/study to, and best of vine compilations. anything on youtube that isn't music or shortform comedy simply does not interest her.

to boost her platform, ty lee decides to go on a reality show. she pretends to be a vapid airhead, but is actually very subtly manipulating not only the other contestants, but also the crew. she walks away from the whole experience with double the number of instagram followers (she already had a sizable amount) and a huge bag. anyway, azula goes through a phase of obsessively watching a lot of clips from. that

mai is indebted to the guy who reuploaded all the “patti reviews exotic animals” videos after they got taken down from the original channel. her favorite youtube video of all time though is nathan fielder thin watermelon. she rewatches it at least once a week

ty lee’s youtube history is just meditation playlists and also the goriest true crime stories she can find #justgirlythings <3

yue loves the artful simplicity of those animated tedx videos. they’ve led her down a lot of really interesting research rabbitholes. she promised katara she’d stop sending them to sokka though after he spent the next month telling her about nothing but eel mating habits and lesser known facts about genghis khan

iroh only uses youtube to watch recordings of tea ceremonies and isn’t even aware that there are other types of videos on the platform. ignorance is truly bliss 

jet exclusively watches videos with the word “callout” in the title. the longer and more contrived, the better

#kyoshialone #asks #the gaang and #modern au #i guess #this ask was really hard because my knowledge of the content on youtube is very limited lmao #clearly i shouldve asked my brother what kids his age are into before trying to answer this

[edgyandoverzealous]

Characters that remind me of me S/O pt 2

Electric boogaloo because it's me. Duh. And give me the opportunity and I will not hesitate to compare them because my partner is hella neat and I love them. Informal analysis you know the drill. A bit more annoying this time because I'm a brat I 'spose. @moltenatlas I love youuu.

The Narrator - The Stanley Parable

• no one should be surprised. No one.

• With the amount of bullshit puns, pickup lines, pouting, and overall annoyances I dish out on the regular?

• They don't get paid enough tm for my chaos but they love me anyways.

• note: payment does not exist unless you count the compiled monster energies, presents, and affection I as a simp and clingy boyfriend have so graciously provided. *many tiny bows*

• A witty, sarcastic, dry/situationally humored chatterbox??

• I'll take them! *Slams money on the table* Please! I'm a good listener, or I at least try, I promise. Oh I got them around ten months ago? Fuck yeah, concrete!

• made me choke from laughter on three different occasions. A particular goose bit robbed my breathing privileges for two blocks. </3

• much like the Stanley Parable closet ending/ the jumping of the moving platform interaction.

• Also you know the look that we know the narrator is doing behind his voice... I've seen it and I've apologized through nervous giggles every. single. time.

• nice voice nice voice nice voice. <3

• don't know about you, but I could listen to the narrator for hours, you know who else I could listen to for hours? YUP. You guessed it.

• this is here almost purely because I compared them to the narrator verbally before and it seemed to be taken /neg. Listen here, Love, the narrator from tsp is legitimately the best. Shhhh.

Brady - teen beach movie

• okay so hear me out. It's their favorite movie okay and it's legitimately good so stfu sheesh.

• This blonde has rottmnt Leo vibes. Low key.

• But also slightly oblivious in everyday expressions such as analogies or turn of phrases rather but overly competent in romantic settings and can sing well?

•hmm wonder who that's like, oh wait *staresatthemstaresatthemstaresatthem*

• Selkirk Rex cat vibes the both of them sweet and soft.

•additionally loud sunshine blonde trope anyone? *holds up my relationship* because I found it. Actually no, actually this one's mine.

• You know what else? They're both good at deciphering poorly communicating messes. *coughs me and Mack coughs*

• Blerg day where speaking and verbalizing needs and wants is hard, it's cool. Because apparently somewhere down the line of knowing me, my partner figured out what my noises of acknowledgement, stuttering or otherwise, means. They know me like the back of their hand apparently. Show offish if you ask me. But it genuinely is really sweet and highly appreciated. I'm sorry I'm difficult. ; H ;

• have you ever seen eyes so pretty when they light up over something?

• A sweetheart. The biggest actually.

• He's just so understanding and caring like someone else I know.

Stella - Lemonade Mouth

• my rebel *swoons* <3

• Both are likely to encourage arson and someone would fucking do it.

• Whether that 'someone' is me or not depends entirely on outside factors. Such as time of day, location, and----

• Starting with the obvious

• plays guitar

• Who else relates to all of this? The love of my life, exactly.

• Stella uses what I call "with cherries on top tactics" which is essentially asking really nicely with a few whistles and bells. A sweeter tone. Ect. to convince her fellow bandmates into things. The love of my life also is prone to doing this. Ie: the amount of times I've complied to something because a couple pet names or a softly toned "please" were thrown in. I am a very weak man.

• sarcasmmmmm

• the lookssss. She's so prettyyy, like someone else I love very much.

• she thinks she's funny and she's right because she commits to the bit.

• you know who else thinks they're funny and are right? yeah. exactly.

• Rightfully so, but also convincing cocky bastard. You may say that confidence is feigned but I would still follow you to the ends of the earth so it's at the very least believable and earned.

Wednesday - Netflix's Wednesday

• Shout out to my little sister who made me provide in depth reasoning to why I think Wednesday Addams From Netflix's Wednesday is neat therefore giving me the analysis work done already.

• Also as spoiler-free as possible because my partner wants to watch Wednesday and hasn't yet. Aka nothing major to the plot mentioned.

• She has on multiple occasions threatened bodily harm or murder to those who have wronged those she cares about though a select few. Hmm I wonder who else has done that? My partner mayhaps towards my abusers.

• She's dorky and passionate about her interests, of which are obscure, and is nonjudgmental of others' interests. My partner also has what one may call obscure taste but mine are too. We just kinda ping-pong each other's interests and it's wonderful.

• She has a competitive streak and is a good musician. You know who else does this? Yeah. Exactly.

• She also has good dry humor and sarcasm aka the love of my life.

• what can I say, I like competitive musician oddballs. They are charming.

Willow - The owl house

• This entire thing is projecting but this one reflects more of myself bc call me Hunter I am traumatized and in love.

• Aka they're stuck with a sad-blonde trope if dirty blondes count because that's what's under the years worth of hair dye.

• Strong strong strong.

• Appears fearless. Even when she's not she stands tall and takes a lead. Awfully familiar if you ask me.

• bad vision. wait wait wait I'm sorry.

• Likes plants and flowers. Knows a lot about them too. It's neat and impressive. Dare I say cute? I do I dare.

• Witch???? Withc?? Counterclockwise stirred tea motherfuckers.

• Good at comforting people even if she doesn't quite think she is. IE: When Willow first meets Gus, he's having a panic attack in the same room Willow actively hides in to get away from it all. She tries to comfort him by waving a horrifying abomination at him but she then teaches him a breathing technique once she's assessed the situation. This can apply to my partner as well because they aren't super confident in their comforting ability yet during any given one of my meltdowns they have consistently offer things of comfort such as a hug and then have done a check in for basic needs such as if I've eaten.

Annabeth Chase - Pjo hoo

• Not gonna lie this one right here legitimately scares me. Because I am an og pjo fan and since I was in 3rd grade I've wanted what Percabeth has and as a Percy kin from the very beginning I now finally have that and I am terrified of losing it.

• Legitimately going to cry over this as I write it. Also the reason this took so don't tell anyone shhh.

• *cough cough* anyways so...

• Smarts. Even though she still struggles with learning Annabeth is incredibly bright in practical knowledge as well excelling in certain subjects due to an interest in said subjects. A lot like someone near and dear to me. In their case Language Arts and any science but especially chemistry.

• Tense and complex family situations. If you've read the books, you know and the situations have strong parallels as I remember. I'm sorry to point it out but it's been fairly on topic recently and I worry about it and you.

• The love of my life loves reading. They are more proficient in reading than anyone I've ever met. Whether it's comprehension or just the speed of reading it never fails to be impressive. If you hand Annabeth anything written in Greek she's the same way.

• The following few may just be headcannons/subtext but hear me out.

• When Annabeth hyperfixates on something she then immediately starts branching out hypotheticals. Aka, in my partners case, AUs and headcannons.

• I'm willing to bet almost anything that Annabeth prefers her coffee less sweet than most allowing the caffeine to be a part of the flavor profile and to feel a fuller affect of said caffeine. Though she prefers tea over all. Aka, just like my partner.

• Honest af. No beating around the bush and is quite logically sound. A lot like someone else I know.

• As Annabeth is to Percy and vice versa I view my partner as my lifeline. It's no speculation that Percy and Annabeth have been through a lot from familial issues, near death experiences, and literally going to hell and back with each othervfor each other, the fact that they are each other's lifeline is a definite. I can't speak fully for the other person, obviously, but I'm 65-70% sure it's mutual. Idk though so don't quote me. But personally my partner has helped me through some dark times and a good share of breakdowns. From being my first long term friend after the incident leading me to this point to becoming the first truly positive interaction I've had romantically I can confidently say they've made a major impact on my path to recovery and words cannot describe how thankful I am for that nor how much they mean to me.

#because character analysis is my love language #wednesday netflix #toh willow #annabeth chase #the narrator #tsp narrator #brady teen beach movie #stella lemonade mouth #i love them sm

[gotnofucks]

His Responsibility

Pairing: dark!Andy Barber x Reader

Summary: When you’re pregnant and scared, Andy decides he will take the responsibility, whether you want it or not.

Words: 3.4k

Warning: Non-con/Dub-con, smut, breeding kink, pregnancy, age gap (reader is in 20s), 18+ ONLY

A/N: This is my slightly late entry for @just-one-ordinary-fangirl​ 1000 followers challenge. Congratulations Lucy, you beautiful, absolutely breathtaking soul. I love you so much! The prompt has been bolded.

The crook of your elbow still throbbed as you drove away from the labs, having just given a blood sample. Jacob was supposed to be with you but like every other time, he had bailed out. Seeing no other option, you changed your path and turned towards the Barber house, hoping to find answers there.

You hesitated a moment before getting out and ringing the bell, nervously twisting the hem of your t-shirt. Sweat and tears were threatening to spill over and you hastily blinked while wiping at your hairline, ringing the bell again. You straighten once the door was swung open, coming face to face with Andy Barber.

His mouth opened in surprise, eyes taking in your bothered appearance. Softly saying your name in question, he moved aside to let you in, frowning at you.

“Are you okay?” He asked, gently placing a hand on your shoulder. You wanted to start bawling. Everything about your life was spiraling out of your control and you needed to talk before things went worse. Before you could speak however, you heard footsteps behind you and saw Jacob come down the stairs, looking outraged at seeing you in his house.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” He rudely snapped and your eyes narrowed. What had ever possessed you to date this bastard?

“Jacob!” Andy scolded, “that’s no way to talk to your girlfriend.”

You scoffed as Jacob rolled his eyes. You’d broken up nearly a month ago, and while he’d been desperate to have you back at first, now he only went about telling anyone who’d listen what a sanctimonious bitch you were.

“We broke up dad.” Jacob said. “What are you doing here? You didn’t really think I’ll take you back, did you?”

Your fingers curled into a fist, a sneer curling on your lips as you glared at him. You wouldn’t touch this piece of shit with a ten feet pole.

“Take me back? I broke up with you, asswipe.” You snapped. “And anyway, I am not here for you. I need to speak with Mr. Barber.”

Jacob’s eyes narrowed suspiciously while Andy’s frown deepened, his gaze questioningly fixed on you.

“What about?” Jacob asked, crossing his arms across his chest. You noted with wry amusement how pathetic he looked next to his father who was watching your interaction with displeasure. Andy and you and had always gotten along well, and even before you broke up, you often wondered how such a man raised a dick like Jacob.

“None of your fucking business. Mr. Barber, can we please talk?” You asked, addressing Andy. He motioned you towards the direction of his study and you made your way there, trying not to pay attention to Jacob’s protests as he and Andy argued. You sat in Andy’s study, wiping your sweaty hands on your pants. You were scared, angry and humiliated but Andy was your last hope.

He came in a couple minutes later, shutting the door after him and taking the seat across from you. Andy looked at you kindly, giving you a small smile that reminded you of how often he had sided with you over his son in previous arguments. You could talk to him. He would understand.

“Please, don’t judge me.” You pleaded and saw him roll his eyes. After everything that you knew happened to their family, Andy Barber is the last person who’d ever judge anyone.

“Don’t insult me by saying that.” He chided. “You can talk to me freely.”

You took a deep breath before reaching inside your bag and pulling out the pregnancy test. Two pink lines glared back at you, and once you passed it on to Andy, his eyes widened. He looked from the small stick to you, twice, blinking in surprise.

“Jacob?” He asked and you nodded.

You’d told him you missed your period last week and got a positive result but he neither answered your texts nor call you back. After three days of silence, you’d finally managed to get him to agree to accompany you for a blood test, but he had been a no show today as well.

“I don’t know what to do.” You admitted, shoulders slumping down in defeat. A baby didn’t fit any of your current plans and you were shit scared of how your parents would react. It didn’t help that the father of the baby didn’t look like someone who would help you shoulder the responsibility.

“Does he know?” Andy asked, rolling the stick in his hands. His voice had gone hard, but you knew it was mostly directed at his careless son than you.

“I told him. He was supposed to come with me to the hospital today. I waited for over an hour.” You said. You jumped when Andy’s hand slammed against the table suddenly, body leaned forward as he fixed you with a terribly furious gaze.

“Hospital?” He questioned, gaze accusing and you reeled back, raising your hand. You understood what he was implying, and though he didn’t have any say in it, you didn’t comment on his reaction.

“I went for a formal blood test. Sometimes these tests can be faulty.” You explained and watched Andy slump back in his chair, rubbing tiredly at his eyes. There was silence until he sighed deeply, folding his hands and leaning his elbows on the table.

“I am sorry.” He apologized. “About myself and my son. He’s a nasty piece of shit.”

You cracked a small smile, sharing an amused look with Andy until you started chuckling. That chuckle turned to a laugh, and your body vibrated as you lost all control. You laughed, you laughed until it turned into a sob and then a wail, helpless cries leaving your mouth with seemingly no end. Tears made their way down your eyes and into your open mouth, coating your tongue in bitter saltiness and you were suddenly in Andy’s arm, cradled to his chest where he held you tight.

He rocked your sobbing body slowly, patting your back and head as you wet his shirt with your snot and tears. Your helplessness and fear about what the future held had you snapping, and you let out your sorrows in the arms of the man who sired the reason for all your problems.

You may have cried for a few minutes or hours, you didn’t know. But Andy didn’t push you away, holding you until the last of your sniffles disappeared and you were able to breath normally. Mortified, your cheeks burning with heat and humiliation you raised your head from his chest to meet his eyes, watery gaze meeting a kind and concerned one.

“I am so sorry.” You whispered, embarrassed at having lost control like this.

A rough hand wiped at the wet tear tracks on your face, gentle and soft as he finally turned your chin up again.

“Don’t be. You deserve a breakdown.” Andy said, smiling softly at you. He slowly moved away and took his own seat, passing you a glass of water and not speaking until you’d taken a few sips. “Who else knows?”

“Just you for now. My parents…they aren’t exactly going to be supportive about this.” You answered, looking down. Your conservative family will either have you disowned or in an arranged marriage within a week.

When Andy spoke your name, you saw him conflicted. The lines in his forehead were deepened, unsure as to what to say to you.

“Do you want me to talk to Jacob? Because I assure you, he’ll take the responsibility. I’ll make him do it.” He promised you.

“At this point, I think my life would be better off without him. I am just here to discuss options with you.” You said and Andy frowned again.

“You wanna get rid of it?” He gruffly questioned, jaw clenched. You held in your frustration, allowing him to have his own opinions.

“No” You said, “I just wanna know my rights. I want to know that my position at the university and work will not be compromised. I want to know about child support and the laws that protect me. I need advice Mr. Barber. If I will bring a life into this world, I want to be prepared for it. I may have made a lot of bad decisions, but I refuse to be a bad mother.”

Andy looked at you as if looking at you for the first time. You saw him process your words until he slowly nodded, not looking away from you.

“I’ll help you. Give me a few days, I’ll compile all that you need.”

You were just about to sleep when you heard the knocking. Putting a robe over your t-shirt and shorts you went to answer the door, surprised when it was Andy. It had been three days since your talk, and you were to pick your blood reports the following morning.

“Mr. Barber” You greeted, letting him in. Why was he here so late?

“We need to talk.” Andy said, taking a seat on your couch. You bit your lip as you sat near him, wondering what had him looking so serious.

“I spoke to Jacob. He refused to take any responsibility. I am sorry I raised a jackass who won’t step in.” Andy said and you pursed your lips, not in the least bit surprised. You’d already gathered that Jacob was a fucking jerk, and you’d rather your kid have no dad than a deadbeat one.

“You don’t need to apologize Mr. Barber, it is not your fault.” You assured Andy.

“Please, call me Andy. I want you to know that if Jake won’t step in, I will. I will take care of you.” Andy promised and you blinked before shaking your head.

“I – Andy, that’s really sweet of you. But outside of legal advice I don’t need any help. I am a strong woman. I can take care of myself and my kid. Also, no offense, but I don’t want my kid too close to his father’s side and then have them wonder why dad doesn’t love them.” You said.

Andy regarded you slowly, a hand rubbing his beard before he rested back against the couch.

“No.” He said firmly.

“No?” You asked, confused. What did he mean no?

“Don’t ever say anything like that ever again. That child, they are a Barber. You’re not taking them away from me.” Andy said, fixing you with his deep blue eyes. You mouth parted in shock, a hazy sort of disbelief clouding your vision.

“Excuse me?” You sputtered, looking at him as if he’d lost his mind.

“That child will not grow up without a father. If Jake won’t claim them, I will. They have my blood in their veins too.” Andy said.

He was speaking, but he made no sense. You looked at him, not taking in a word he said. The only thing you focused on was how Andy had inched closer to you, sitting right next to you until your thighs touched. You blinked before quickly getting up to move away when Andy grabbed your hand and pulled you down beside him again.

“Andy! Let me go!” You cried, hitting against his shoulder. He didn’t move away, instead, he placed his other hand on your tummy, gently feeling.

“This is my kid inside you now. No one will know it’s Jake’s. I am your baby daddy.” Andy announced and before you knew it, his lips had enveloped yours, kissing you deep and hard. You struggled in his hold, panic making you trash as tears ran down your face. You pushed until Andy pulled away, holding you tight by your waist.

“Please, let me go.” You sobbed, uncomprehending of how things had gotten so out of hand.

“No. We will make sure this kid is mine. After tonight, no one will doubt their parentage.” He said and stood up, pulling your resisting body with him towards your bedroom. He more or less dragged you inside, locking the door and throwing you on your bed.

You crawled away from him, clutching your robe tight in fear as he came closer. His blue eyes had gotten darker, and you couldn’t look away as he unbuttoned his shirt.

“Please, don’t do this. Why are you doing this?” You begged, body trembling as he came closer. You shifted away but Andy dragged you back by your ankle, holding your body down with his weight as his hands came to remove your clothes.

“I’m making our relationship legit. I am giving myself a new chance at family with a perfect mother who will raise a good kid with me.” He said, kissing you again. Your robe slipped away, and Andy’s hands went under your t-shirt, racing up to cup your tits. He groaned in your mouth, tasting you and your tears as you weakly protested.

“No. You can’t do this.” You said, crying harder when his lips went from your jaw to your neck, kissing sweetly. His beard scratched against your skin, hands pinned underneath his massive body as he vowed to claim you and your kid.

“I can. I can do this, and you can’t stop me.” He whispered hotly in your ear, fighting your t-shirt off your wiggling body. Your bare chest met cold air, and soon enough your nipples were enveloped with the warmth of Andy’s mouth. He suckled gently, then harder, biting then soothing the sting with his tongue.

“These tits now belong to me.” He said, moving over to lavish is attention to the other breast before dipping lower to pepper kisses over your stomach. “Don’t worry little one, daddy is here. You’ll always have a father in me.”

You grew tired as your limbs hurt, your pathetic hits doing nothing to Andy. He seemed not to notice your cries or pleas, his nose nudging against your covered mound. You made one last effort to fight, kicking out your legs to push him away but Andy caught them, turning you on your side and delivering a sharp slap to your backside that had you gasping in pain and shock.

“Don’t be a fucking brat. You have to be a good mother to our child. You need to learn obedience to teach obedience.” He scolded you, pulling down your shorts and panties in a quick move. You sagged helplessly, not fighting anymore as Andy stripped off his own clothes. Any other day you would have appreciated how good he looked for a man his age, but now all you registered was how huge and strong he was, how easily he could overpower you.

He pulled your legs apart, baring your pussy to his hungry eyes. To your mortification, your folds were wet with slick, the curls on your mound glistening with the evidence of your arousal. You hid your face in embarrassment, unable to watch as Andy placed a kiss on the hood of your clit.

“Beautiful” He said breathlessly. “Absolutely gorgeous. Jacob never deserved you. He wouldn’t know how to handle a girl like you.”

With the first contact of his tongue, you bit your lip to stifle your moans. No man had eaten you with such passion before, as if you were a feast prepared for a man starved for years. Andy took his time exploring your pussy, opening you up like a flower before nudging his tongue in every fold, every crevice of you. He slurped and sucked, using his lips and tongue and teeth with such precision that you didn’t realize you were howling openly in the air now.

He eased one finger inside your entrance, lips pulling at your hard nub in a way that shot tingles up your spine. You fisted the bedsheet, twisting this way and that, unknowingly thrusting your pelvis in Andy’s face who could feel you were close.

“Let go darling,” He urged, “let go for me. Cum!”

You snapped, your back arching as you spilled around his finger that was clamped tightly in your velvet heat, his mouth greedily collecting all the moisture with relish. Pleasure left you lethargic and you didn’t react as Andy crawled up your body, kissing you while he coated his huge tool in your juices.

“Andy” You softly whispered, falling into a daze as he entered you slowly. Your still pulsing channel was snug against his cock, the hair at his base rubbing deliciously against your clit. He was way larger than his son and you felt full in a way you had never before.

“Your pussy belongs to me. You belong to me from now.” He promised, moving in and out of you at an agonizingly slow pace. He made your feel every ridge of his cock that rubbed against your spongy walls, he had you giving a high pitch screech every time he hit bottom. The mattress under you bounced with the movements of your body and your hands found themselves around Andy’s neck.

“I just want to be a good mother. I didn’t ask you for this.” You said, unable to keep your moans inside as he went faster.

“You need a strong man who will give you a family. Our kid will grow in a house of love. I will love you both and so will you.”

You tensed as he teased your clit, twiddling it with his thumb as he hit harder and deeper. His eyes were fixed at your entrance, watching enthralled as he went in and out of your body. The sounds of slapping skin and squelching fluid that dribbled down from your cunt to the bedsheet echoed around the room, and soon, you were falling again. You came with Andy’s name on your lips, both a curse and a prayer as you felt him groan and twitch inside you.

His warm cum painted your walls, marking you as his. He stayed in for sometime, holding you possessively close to his sweaty body until you were sure you smelt like him. He pulled out, appreciating how him cum flowed out of your abused hole and he smiled. Softly kissing your forehead, he gathered you in his arms and pulled a sheet over your slightly trembling frame, soothing you with gentle caresses.

“I knew it the moment he brought you home to meet me for the first time. You were too good for him. He never loved you right, never treated you like the princess you were. But now I’ve got you. You’ll wake up to coffee and breakfast and lazy kisses in bed, you’ll come home to a comfortable house and a dick that will give you a show of heaven. I’ll love you like you deserve to be loved. With reverence and devotion.”

He left you, coming back to clean the mess between your legs gently. He fed you himself, wiping every tear with a kiss until you stopped crying all together. Looking at him, the man who had violated your trust and body with equal parts of force and love, you wondered for a moment how drastically your life would change now.

You did not want him to accompany you inside, but he did. He snatched your report from your hand, keeping a hold over your waist until you went back to the car. Sitting beside you on the driver’s side, he tore open the envelope and pulled out your blood report, falling backward with a long sigh.

“What? What is it?” You asked, quickly taking it from his hands and reading. The paper crinkled as your fingers dug in it, tears of pain building in your eyes.

Negative

Not pregnant

It had all been for nothing. You didn’t have the Barber’s heir inside you and last night Andy had taken you by force for nothing. You crushed the report, wiping at your eyes and found his gaze on you.

“You fucked me for nothing.” You spat acidly, frustration and pain clawing at your heart. “I am not pregnant. And I am going.”

Before you had ever turned to open the door, Andy was pulling you roughly to himself, hauling your struggling body over his lap.

“You’re not going anywhere darling. You’re mine now. I’m not pathetic like my son. Unlike him, I will put a baby in you.” He growled in your ear, kissing a hot trail against your neck. You shook your head, looking at him in disbelief.

“But – but I’m not pregnant.” You said again, hoping he’ll understand.

“I know baby” He cooed, “but soon enough, you will be. Let’s go home and make it happen.”

#joof1000challenge #dark!andy barber x reader #andy barber x reader #dark!andy barber #andy x reader #Defending Jacob #andy barber

[crimsonkenjii-writes]

heyy it's the giyuu simp hiding in your request box ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ mind if i sneak in another request :> just gonna slide this with a belated valentines day card

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may i request a giyuu x reader headcanons? where its just giyuu and the reader living a peacefull and happy life with their kids, just fluff of how their every day life goes and giyuu with his kids :D maybe even some headcanons of the other pillars meeting the kids and his s/o (feel free to change the idea ofcc i don't mind if you write it at all (~^.^)~)

Hello fellow Giyuu simp lolol

This sounds really cute! Of course I’ll write it! ʕ◡ᴥ◡ʔ♡

This turned out to be very long haha hope you don’t mind :)

Giyuu x Fem!Reader with Kids!! ♡

AU: Life Without Demons

♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡

♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ° 𐐪𐑂 ♡

Giyuu was the first to ask for kids. It was a shock since you’d figure he’d be too nervous and insecure to think he’d be able to be a father. But he loves you too much to not have children with you. He just can’t picture his life without you and both of your guys’ children in his future.

“Y/N...” he approaches you timidly, “I have um something to ask you...” he kept fidgeting with his hands and struggled making eye contact. His cheeks starting to burn. “What is it, Giyuu??” He sat there a bit, his brows knitted together as if he’d trying to figure out how to compile his sentence. “Let’s have children!” He finally bursts out boldly. You were taken back for a second but smiled wide and hugged him, agreeing with all of your heart.

Giyuu didn’t want too many kids. He only wanted about two children. (Maybe three children he’s thinking on it 👀) And that’s what you both had. One boy and one girl. The boy took more of your looks but also had a good mix of Giyuu as well. He ended up taking his eyes and messy hair but had your hair color and overall facial features. The girl was a very good mix between the two of you. The boy was the eldest child.

Giyuu was the type of parent to spoil his children a lot. You often had to stop him because it got hard for him to say no to them a lot of the times. But when it came down to it, he knew when to be strict and stand his ground. Like if one of your children throws a tantrum for not getting the toy they want, Giyuu would have a stern tak with them about how they need to learn the importance of being told “no” and to handle it like a “big boy/girl”

Giyuu would also do whatever it takes to help you with anything around the house or with the kids. He’d also do anything to spend as much time with his children as possible.

Giyuu also secretly loved it when his kids would get nightmares and ask to sleep with the both of you. He really loved sleeping next to his family and would often invite the kids into the futon even if they didn’t have a nightmare that night. They’d always get really excited and join without hesitation. He also LOVES holding their hands. He loves how tiny and soft they are in his large, calloused ones. He also really loved having them ride on his shoulders

When it came down to being the good cop bad cop, you both had an equal share between it. I can see Giyuu being pretty strict but not to the point where it’s suffocating. He’d still take extra precautions to make sure his kids are safe and don’t get into trouble. He also tries to come to complete understandings with his children when they’re in disagreements with him. He’d sit and talk with them and make sure they don’t feel invalidated or hurt. Sometimes though, he’ll have to put his foot down and tell his children to listen to them and not question his thinking. He’ll often try to come back to them later and explain again.

Kamboko Squad and Pillars’ Reactions to First Born (and general interactions with kids)

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡꘎

When the news got out to everyone that you both were expecting children, they were all so very excited.

You were a few weeks pregnant and Tanjirou (and the rest of the squad) came by to visit and he was able to smell it off you. You were a little shocked how he was able to notice until he explained how his mom smelled a certain way when pregnant with his siblings. Then it made a bit more sense. Kind of.

Poor little boy teared up because of how happy he was for the both of you. He was so happy to see Giyuu with the love of his life and now starting a family. Inosuke got all those fluffy things around his head. He was very soft and gentle around you and it was really cute. Sometimes he’d just stare at your bloated stomach and it seemed like he was having a psychic conversation with the baby lolol.

Nezuko was very excited to meet the new baby and couldn’t wait nine months! Zenitsu was really happy for the both of you and it really warmed his heart to hear the baby’s heartbeat. He also got very scared for you because he heard that giving birth if very painful and he’d never want to go through something like that either.

They all saw your kids as their own little siblings, especially Tanjirou. Tanjirou is very good with kids so they ended up liking Tanjirou a lot and would often beg you to let him visit more often so they could play with him. Nezuko also saw them and her own siblings and would always volunteer to knit/fix their haoris if they ever got damaged. She always brought snacks (usually toasted rice crackers) for the kids when she visited. She also helped with cooking dinner when she visited.

Zenitsu loved playing with them. Until one day your son found a worm and showed it to Zenitsu and he freaked out and thought it was a snake for a second. He started to become more wary of your son from then on.

Inosuke shared his boar mask with them and would let them ride on his back as he ran around. He also visited one day with a nicely wrapped box (wrapped by Tanjirou) and gifted it to your kids. You and Giyuu were very confused to see that it only had acorns in there.

You had Shinobu do regular check ups with you to make sure the pregnancy was going well. Despite her constant teasing, she actually told Giyuu how happy she was for him. This really warmed his heart and he couldn’t thank Shinobu enough for all her help. She helped with both the pregnancies/deliveries

Mitsuri was so so SO excited to meet the new babies!! She seemed more excited than you and Giyuu! She loves babies and thinks they’re really cute. And the fact that it’s going to be yours and Giyuu’s baby??? Geez, that just makes it 10x more adorable!! She really really wanted to be the first friend to hold the baby so you granted her wish. She was crying so much, she was so happy.

The baby’s cheeks became very red from how much Mitsuri pinched them. She nicknamed him her “Little Mochi” because of his squishy cheeks. (and she nicknamed your girl her “Little Sakura”)

Obanai kept trying to deny how happy and excited he was. “Hmph! I don’t do babies. Not at all.” But then he saw its cute, little chubby cheeks and couldn’t resist. He then vowed to be the greatest uncle to your baby boy (and girl once she visited the world)

Kyojuro was really excited to meet the baby too. His booming voice scared the baby and made him cry so Kyo learned to be more quiet around him. He was so nervous holding the baby but then got more use to it and didn’t want to hand him back. He wanted to hold on to the little boy forever!!

Muichiro was mostly dazed out but waved his finger in front of him and your little baby boy held onto him. Muichiro got very happy. “Y/N, Y/N! Look! He’s- he’s holding on to me!!” You’ve never seen him smile so wide. He’d often visit and be like, “Can I play with him today? I’ve missed him.” And he’d play with him for hours! He was the same with your little girl as well once she came around.

Sanemi kept trying to act all tough. “No! I don’t care about kids! Least of all babies! I couldn’t care less about Tomioka’s stupid ba-“ his eyes widened when he saw the baby. Then you saw the most softest smile on his face for the first time. He hugged the baby tight to him and didn’t let go or move for a while. He might or might not have teared up. But you swore with him that you saw nothing 👀 He’d make plenty of ohagi for the kids and make some extra for you and Giyuu. Giyuu was very happy to see Sanemi opening up a bit more and glad he became better friends with him as well.

“Tch, don’t get too comfortable, Tomioka. I’m only here for my niece, nephew and Y/N.” He was teasing he loved Giyuu too.

Tengen and his wives were all over the baby! His wives loved the baby so so so much!! They even planned out a baby shower for you when they heard the news so a lot of your baby stuff came from them! Once he finally joined the world, all of them teared up from joy. They all took turns holding the baby, playing with him, bouncing him on their laps. Tengen said that if you or Giyuu ever needed help, him and his wives were right there anytime.

The wives loved playing with your daughter! They’d often do her hair and make it really pretty. They’d also often spoil her with new pretty kimonos and hairpins and always said, “Once she gets older, we’ll always have girls nights out! Do all kind of girl talks and girl things! It’ll be so much fun!!”

Tengen got the baby a whole bunch of shiny jewelry and was like, “Ha! Now your baby boy shall be flamboyant! Even more flamboyant than he was before!!” He also secretly found it extremely adorable how he looked like a little baby Giyuu at first. Then he grew to have more of your facial features and it just made it even cuter for Tengen. He had a little soft spot for your daughter because he thought having a daughter would be very precious so he’d literally do anything for her (and would protect her with his life)

Gyomei was SO happy!!! He of course teared up too and was very very gentle with him. It was kind of cute seeing such a large man hold such a tiny little human. It’s like he could fit them each in one palm. He was one of your go to nanny’s and he’d always wear a pink apron when looking over the kids. He’d spoil them with lots of baked sweets. Everytime he visited, he always had a new beaded necklace to gift them. They ended getting too many and he stopped at one point. But he still gave them one on their birthdays

Shinobu found babies/kids a bit icky since they do have many bodily fluids they can’t control and sometimes don’t wash their hands but she still did normal check ups with them and was very good with them. She’d often visit with some new toys for the kids. She even got your daughter and little butterfly clip. Your son felt left out so she got him one too. For a while both your kids refered to her as the “Butterfly Lollipop Lady” since she gave them lollipops after every doctor visit. She’d just smile chillingly at Giyuu and say, “Tomioka-San, I figured you’d at least teach them my name after all I’ve done for you and your wife.” She was just teasing, she secretly loved her nickname

Shinobu also really loved listening to the baby’s heartbeat through a stethoscope. She also loved putting her hand on your belly and often talked to the baby. She’ll never admit to anyone else but she really enjoyed doing these things with both your pregnancies

#it was really cute writing this lmao thank you for the request!! #also pls forgive if I got anyone out of character lol still getting use to all the pillars #tomioka giyuu x reader #kny #demon slayer #giyuu x reader #tomioka giyuu #demon slayer fanfic #demon slayer x reader #kny fics #kny imagines #kny x reader #mitsuri kanroji #iguro obanai #shinobu kochō #gyomei himejima #sanemi shinazugawa #rengoku kyoujurou #muichiro tokito #uzui tengen #kamado tanjirō #kamado nezuko #zenitsu agatsuma #inosuke hashibira

[bananonbinary]

Time for a Salty Meta Post about Martin!

people who’ve followed this blog for a bit know that spending six hours combing through text for some goddamn sources is my specialty, so i compiled every time jon ever talked about martin’s work in season 1. which for the record, he stopped complaining about all the way back in episode 26, where he was angry that martin of all people got hurt.

things jon gets mad at martin for:

not being able to find records that don’t exist

not being able to find someone based only on a first name

the Dog

not wearing trousers in his off-hours

being the one that got caught up in the jane prentiss thing

mag 004 and mag 012 both have jon taking potshots at martin over research that was proven accurate by outside sources

things jon has never once complained about:

martin not understanding the filing system and just putting stuff away at random

martin being clumsy, constantly ruining things, spilling tea everywhere everyday, etc

martin turning in incompetent, poorly-edited, or badly formatted reports

martin not understanding the terminology used, skills expected, etc., and generally being extremely new to the field

please for the love of god stop making martin the silly bumbling idiot who can’t do anything right just because he doesn’t have a formal education. there’s zero evidence for it in the text, and it’s really weird to act like a 4 year degree would outweigh the *10 years* of job experience he has, not just in academia, but in the institute itself by season one. my boy has worked there longer than ANY of the rest of the main cast. screw you guys.

tl;dr: martin is never once shown to be bad at his job, jon pretty much only ever gets mad at him for the really stupid first impression and also not finding stuff that no one else was able to find either. after martin got hurt, jon talks about his research basically the same way he talks about tim’s or sasha’s work.

fucking proof under the cut:

(i didnt include the s1 finale or martin’s statement bc that’s just...two entire episodes of them talking to each other, but there isn’t really any notable Martin Complaints in either of them imo)

I swear, if he’s brought another dog in here, I’m going to peel him.

[pre-launch trailer]

.

Well, technically three, but I don’t count Martin as he’s unlikely to contribute anything but delays.

[...] Alongside this Tim, Sasha and, yes, I suppose, Martin will be doing some supplementary investigation to see what details may be missing from what we have.

[MAG001 Anglerfish]

.

Martin couldn’t find any records of Ex Altiora as a title in existent catalogues of esoteric or similar literature, so I assigned Sasha to double-check. Still nothing.

[MAG004 Pageturner]

.

I had Martin conduct a follow-up interview with Mr. Woodward last week, but it was unenlightening. Apparently there have been no further bags at number 93 and in the intervening years he has largely discounted many of the stranger aspects of his experience. I wasn’t expecting much, as time generally makes people inclined to forget what they would rather not believe, but at least it got Martin out of the Institute for an afternoon, which is always a welcome relief.

[MAG005 Thrown Away]

.

Martin was unable to find the exact date the original house was built but the earliest records he could find list it as being bought by Walter Fielding in 1891.

[...]

We cannot prove any connection, but Martin unearthed a report on an Agnes Montague, who was found dead in her Sheffield flat on the evening of November 23rd 2006, the same day Mr. Lensik claims to have uprooted the tree.

[MAG008 Burned Out]

.

According to Martin, who was here when they took this statement, it was at this point in writing that Mr. Herbert announced he needed some sleep before continuing. He was shown to the break room where he went to sleep on the couch. He did not awaken; unfortunately succumbing to the lung cancer right there. Martin says the staff had been aware of how serious Mr. Herbert’s condition was, and had advised him to seek medical aid prior to giving his statement, but were told rather bluntly by the old man that he would not wait another second to state his case. I can’t decide whether this lends more or less credibility to his tale.

[MAG010 Vampire Killer]

.

“Veepalach” might also be a mishearing of the Polish word “wypalać”, according to Martin, which means to cauterize or brand. Admittedly, if Martin speaks Polish in the same way he “speaks Latin,” then he might be talking nonsense again, but I’ve looked it up and it appears to check out.

[MAG012 First Aid]

.

I sent Martin to look into this ‘Angela’ character - not that I want him to get chopped up, of course, but someone had to. Apparently, he spent three days looking into every woman named Angela in Bexley over the age of 50. He could not find anyone that matches the admittedly vague description given here, though he informs me that he had some very pleasant chats about jigsaws. Useless ass.

[MAG014 Piecemeal]

.

Martin declined to help with this investigation as he’s “a bit claustrophobic”

[MAG015 Lost John’s Cave]

.

There simply aren’t enough details given in this statement to actually investigate, short of Martin confirming that Mr. Vittery did indeed live at the addresses he provided.

[MAG016 Arachnophobia]

.

Oh, he’s off sick this week. Stomach problems, I think.

Blessed relief if you ask me.

[...]

I asked Martin to try and hunt down Mr. Adekoya himself for a follow-up, but have been informed that he passed away in 2006. 

[MAG017 The Boneturner’s Tale]

.

MARTIN

Well, I need to tell someone what happened, and you can vouch for the soundness of my mind, can’t you?

ARCHIVIST

…

That is beside the point.

[MAG022 Colony]

.

Martin! Good lord man, if you’re going to be staying in the Archives, at least have the decency to put some trousers on!

[MAG023 Schwartzwald]

.

Martin found one other thing while combing through police reports for the Hither Green area. About a month after this statement was given, on May 15th, 2015, police were called out to once again investigate the chapel.

[MAG025 Growing Dark]

.

I know, but it would have to have been Martin, wouldn’t it? I mean, anything goes wrong around here, it always seems to happen to him. Anyway, we’re getting off topic. Why didn’t you report this?

[MAG026 A Distortion]

.

Martin made contact with the son, Marcus McKenzie, but he declined to talk to us, saying that he’d “already made his statement.”

[MAG027 A Sturdy Lock]

.

Tim and Martin had a bit more luck investigating Tom Haan, though only really enough to confirm that he seems to have completely vanished following his departure from Aver Meats on the 12th of July.

[MAG030 Killing Floor]

.

Martin’s research would seem to indicate the place employed a reasonable number of international staff they preferred to keep off the books

[...]

TIM

Ah well, that’s actually what he was asking, huh! Um, apparently Martin, uh, took delivery of a couple of items last week addressed to you. Did he not mention it?

ARCHIVIST

No, he… Oh, yes, actually. I completely forgot. He said he put it in my desk drawer, hold on.

[MAG036 Taken Ill]

#the magnus archives #LISTEN #i am once again asking people to remember that martin has MORE job experience at the institute than literally any other character #(except elias or i guess maybe rosie) #he's the goddamn veteran not the newbie #fan wank /

[exovapor]

I'm OBSESSED with your writing. Can you try.. Maybe, Donnie being a filthy boy being an 'stalker-ish' of his long time crush? Be checks their FB for new posts, saves every picture of them he finds? He doesn't mean to be a creep, feels guilty, but just doesn't know how to ask for more than friendship?

Good afternoon Anon. Here is my short story in relation to your ask.

I wasn't sure where you wanted me to take this, so I had to do a bit of guessing on my part. I hope this something like you were wanting.

I will admit that this ask was a bit of a struggle for me, not knowing a clear direction to take it outcome made me a little unsure of my writing and guessing abilities LOL. However, I will admit to crying along with the characters in this story more than once.

Thanks again for the ask and the initial compliment. I hope to continue to earn your favor in future posts.

· Stalker [noun]: 1a person who harasses or persecutes someone with unwanted and obsessive attention. 2a person who hunts game stealthily.

· Donnie stared at the definition on his one of his monitor screens while his various other screens were busy flashing receipts of files downloaded, text trail streams from your phone, notices of any social media post/update/like/heart/emoji, a GPS line grid of your routes today (overlayed over the routes you’d taken previously), and data search hits of anything and everything that pertained to you.

· At this point, the boy had literally every picture you had ever posted, anywhere, of yourself. In fact, he had all the pictures that other people posted of you in them. He had even gone through the effort of designing a face recognition program that picks you out of the background of total strangers’ pictures and, yeah, he had those in a file too.

· He has special file folders that compile things that you like, things you don’t like, things that make you happy, things that make you sad. He is your own personal Pinterest and you didn’t even know it… and maybe that is the part that keeps bothering him so much.

· He sits staring at that word and definition and chewing his bottom lip. True, he knows the word and the meaning, but he needed to LOOK at it, analyze it, mull it over in his guilt ridden brain.

· He just KNEW the word Stalker couldn’t apply to him.

· After all, he isn’t harassing or persecuting you, you don’t know! So, it isn’t necessarily ‘unwanted attention’. It is just…unknown attention.

· Stealthily, hmmmm, did that part apply to him? Well, He isn’t EXACTLY being stealthy.

· If you knew about technology like him, then you would probably see his programs running on your devices and be alerted to his activities. AND, if you shared his love and view of technology, then you would probably be more understanding of his activities and not consider them stealthy…just data mining. In fact, you might applaud him.

· ‘Ok, that was taking it a bit too far’, Donnie thinks to himself and he feels a band tighten and squeeze around his infatuated heart.

· He is almost certain that you would be shocked to learn of his extra curricular activities and how they revolve around every aspect of you.

· Regardless of how he tried to spin the truth and wiggle out of the definition of stalker, Donnie still felt guilty for invading your privacy. However, he honestly couldn’t help himself…at least not anymore.

· He has fought the urge, the nagging thoughts and the burning need, to know more about you for what seemed like an eternity.

· Listen to him, he is starting to sound dramatic like Mikey! What is his turning into? He is losing his rational edge!

· To be accurate, it hasn’t been an eternity. In fact, he has known you 1 year, 36 days, 14 hours, 11 minutes, and 23 seconds to be exact. However, you started occupying space in his mind 2 minutes into meeting you and your claim over his mind has grown exponentially over time.

· You were quiet and reserved during that first meeting, so there wasn’t much to go on. It started as a simple visual interest with a thought of ‘Oh. She’s pretty’.

· However, then you started talking and that changed everything.

· You opened up more and more each time you hung out with their little group, revealing layers and layers of interests and personality. You were fascinating…and that’s when his thoughts about you really started to snowball and spiral out of control.

· You went from being a simple pretty face to being a walking embodiment of everything he seriously ever dreamed of having in a mate.

· Early on, there were three sticking points that really made Donnie’s feelings problematic. 1. He was a nearly seven foot tall walking talking turtle and you weren’t. 2. You had a boyfriend that you were deeply in love with and adored. 3. Donnie was too insecure about #1 and how you felt about inter-species dating to let you know that you had started to OWN his heart.

· Now, thanks to his surveillance, there were only two sticking points….#1 and #3.

· He still remembers the feelings of that day, 44 days ago, when the blip of information popped up on this screen alerting him to the fact that your boyfriend was starting to stray.

· Donnie had severely conflicting feelings bombard him at once and it was overwhelming.

· The initial knee jerk reaction was elation, one of the problems blocking him from you may soon be null.

· However, the feeling of elation only lasted for a second or two before the intense anger and sadness set in. Donnie was honestly shocked at the depth of his anger, he didn’t even know he had that level of malice in him. Had he been in physical proximity to your boyfriend at that moment in time, Donnie isn’t sure that he wouldn’t have hurt your guy…or worse.

· How COULD this guy do this? WHY would he? He HAD YOU! What the heck was this guy thinking? Not only did he have you, but you thought the world of him. When you spoke about him you would smile so genuinely, your eyes would shine and gaze off into a bright imagined future. Donnie was always so jealous to watch it happen, he wondered what it would be like to be THAT GUY. And here the idiot was throwing it all away and meeting up with another girl!

· WHAT THE…(yes, this called for a curse) HELL…IS WRONG WITH HUMAN MEN?

· As the anger set root in his heart, the sadness engulfed Donnie like an all-consuming wave. He realized he was going to have to share this information with you, somehow, and that he was going to have to watch as it destroyed you.

· At first, Donnie had a plan to try and save you both from that fate. True, it would hurt him more to save your relationship, but he would rather be the one facing the pain and not you.

· He TRIED to circumvent the situation. He sent anonymous messages to your boyfriend stating that he knew about the infidelity and that he would tell you if needed. However, it didn’t seem like your boyfriend cared because he sent messages back stating Donnie could, basically, go fuck himself.

· Life had cruel sense of irony, thought Donnie, that is exactly what I do since this moron has the woman that I love.

· So, after trying for nearly two weeks to stop what was happening behind your back, Donnie had no choice but to let you in on the secret.

· Donnie couldn’t come right out and tell you that he caught your boyfriend cheating by hijacking your data streams and the data streams of those around you. So, Donnie intercepted some texts between your boyfriend and his mistress and he then sent you a text, under the guise of your boyfriend, telling you to meet him at a specified restaurant for a date.

· It had been a gut wrenching night for Donnie. He remembered watching it all play out on camera feeds from around the restaurant and street outside. He watched you dressed up in your pretty dress get out of your cab in front of the restaurant. You had such a lovely smile on your face, you must have thought you were in for a romantic evening.

· He watched as you walked inside and how the hostess got flustered and confused by a 2nd girl showing up for your boyfriend’s seated-for-two table.

· Donnie stopped breathing as your eyes found the new couple holding hands and giving each other sweet kisses across the table. Hands and lips that were supposed to be yours were touching some stranger.

· Donnie watched your smile and eyes die…the light of your inner sun go out…

· …and it killed him.

· He’s not sure who was crying the hardest, you standing there in that restaurant witnessing the scene or him back at the lair watching your world crush around you on his monitor.

· It had taken a while for you both to recover from that night.

· His brothers noticed his melancholy mood for a couple of weeks but Donnie wouldn’t tell them what was bothering him. And you stayed in your bed, refusing to face the world, for nearly as long.

· Eventually, the group began to notice your silence and absence, so April stopped by your apartment to check on you. She was the one to pull you out of bed, get you to shower and eat. She visited everyday and made sure you had someone to vent to and a shoulder to cry on.

· Donnie was glad that April could be there for you when he couldn’t. He didn’t think it was appropriate for him, a male, to be your confidant at that time. Especially since he felt so much guilt over having to be the one to expose you to that pain.

· No, he didn’t CAUSE the pain, but he did have to make you face it and he didn’t like not being able to protect you from it. You were such a rare, precious creature and watching you in pain felt like he was suffocating slowly.

· There were some points during those first few weeks that he questioned if he did the right thing, but logic told him it would have eventually come to pass with or without his involvement. It was better to rip the bandage of quickly and let you start to heal than it was to let you linger and drag out the inevitable.

· Donnie did secretly check on you every single night during patrol. And, of course, his surveillance feeds were always running. He watched from a distance as his beautiful phoenix burn down to ashes and, eventually, started to rise again.

· Now, it’s been over 3 months and you’ve begun to be more like your old self. Donnie can tell there is a silent sadness there, but you are able to laugh and smile with the group during your get togethers. And each time you two are left alone, his mind nags at him about those last two sticking points.

· Would you be at all interested in him? And HOW does he go about telling you that you have become the center of his world?

· Still staring at the monitor and the Stalker definition, Donnie sighs and rubs the bridge of his snout to release of the pressure now pushing against the inside of his head. The memories of what has happened, the emotions of what was and what is, it was all starting to be too much.

· “Bro, what’s all this?”, Mikey says standing behind Donnie’s chair, talking around a mouth full of pizza.

· “NOTHING!”, says Donnie, voice breaking from the stress of being caught. A startled Donnie quickly taps some keys on his keyboard and the screens revert back to the standard lair camera feeds.

· Mikey may look or even come off as naïve at times, but he’s no fool, he can sense that his older brother is trying to hide something. “Dude, seriously, what was that? I’ve been standing back here reading the screens. I saw Y/N’s name and that looked like her phone number on that other file…, you know the file that looks like texts messages. And why is there a plotted map of the area around her apartment, her work, and to the lair? What’s up?”, Mikey said giving a disapproving look at being thought a pushover.

· “Just standard surveillance, Mikey, nothing to worry about.”, Donnie says trying to placate Mikey’s curiosity. Donnie hates lying, especially to Mikey, but he’s feeling so guilty about being such a…(inward sigh)…stalking creep that admitting the truth is hard to do.

· Mikey stands there staring at Donnie and, as he does, Donnie begins to fidget with his computer chair armrests.

· Mikey stuffs the remnants of the pizza slice into his mouth and does his best Leo impersonation by crosses his arms and staring down at Donnie as sternly as his jolly face can achieve, “Dude, I’m not going to ask you again. You’ve been weird for months. We’ve let it go for the most part but now you are hiding things from me…from ME, dude! You and I, we’re like peanut butter and jelly, we’re ice cream and chocolate fudge, we young dudes have got to stick together. Trust me, bro, I’ve got you!”.

· Donnie stared at the floor, too ashamed to meet Mikey’s eyes any longer. He gave a heavy sigh and reluctantly started to speak, “Sorry Mike, I…I honestly don’t know what’s come over me lately. I’m doing things I never thought I would do, I’m feeling so guilty about it, but I don’t know if I can stop doing it either. I feel…lost.”.

· Mike relaxed his leader stance and leaned against one of Donnie’s lab tables, “Bro, I can tell you’ve been carrying some heavy stuff lately. You need to let it out.”

· Donnie felt the heat rise up through his body like he was suddenly being consumed by a fire and he ripped his glasses off his face and drew them down on the desk in frustration, “Mikey, I’m in love with Y/N. I have been for a while. I have been…”, Donnie hangs his head in shame, “…tracking all her digital foot prints and watching her. In fact, I’m the reason she found out that asshole boyfriend of her's cheated.”

· Mikey’s mouth drops open at Donnie’s demeanor and use of the word ‘asshole’, “Whoa, dude, why didn’t you say something earlier?”.

· Donnie can feel a stinging at the corners of his eyes, this was so embarrassing, so frustrating, so…..so many things at a once. He didn’t have a response for Mikey, all he could do was shake his head.

· Still with his head hung down and staring at the floor, Donnie starts to hear Mikey chuckle. Donnie looks up to see Mikey’s eyes on him and for some reason they are full of merriment at his painful dilemma. Donnie stares at his, normally, very considerate brother in astonishment, this isn’t like Mikey at all!

· “Mikey, I’m more than serious here, now is not the time to make fun of me. What is so funny?”, Donnie asks exasperatedly.

· Mikey shakes his bald head and claps his brother on the shoulder with his green hand, “Bro, she thinks you’re cute.”.

· “W-What?!”, Donnie stammers out.

· Mikey, still chuckling, says, “Yeah, dude, that’s why I asked WHY you didn’t say something about liking her sooner, she’s always thought you were cute. She and I talk about it all the time.”.

· Donnie just stares at his jolly brother in silence. His mind is too blown to form a sentence.

· Mikey turns to leave stating, “And by the way, dude, stop watching her like that…that’s just creepy.”.

@turtle-babe83 @tmntspidergirl @kokokatsworld @nittleboo @the-second-circle-of-shell

#tmnt donatello #tmnt #tmnt donnie #tmnt fanfiction #tmnt x reader #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2016 #tmnt fandom

[fostersffff]

The Big Gundam Watch, Part 4: Mobile Suit Gundam: Char’s Counterattack

Char’s Counterattack is a tremendous milestone for Gundam as a franchise. It was the first original theatrical film (versus the three compilation movies made for the original series), and cemented Gundam as a pop culture institution. It also serves as the epic climax for the multiple-series-spanning, nearly-decade-long rivalry between Amuro Ray and Char Aznable, introducing some of the best mecha designs the series has had to date and multiple lavishly animated action sequences to help give them a worthy send-off.

It’s also a hot mess.

I mentioned elsewhere that I watched this for the first time just a day after finishing Mobile Suit Gundam ZZ, and then I watched it again a few days later, because even though this is infinitely shorter than the three 40+ episode television series that came before it, it tries to pack a lot into its two hour runtime. Unfortunately, it doesn’t do it elegantly.

I’m going to be changing the format of this post slightly for this movie: rather than breaking it up into what I liked, what I liked less, and other observations, I’m gonna talk at length about a handful of specific subjects and then just go into other observations. The reason, to be perfectly blunt, is that it’s still hard for me to say what I liked and what I didn’t.

QUESS

There’s a lot to say about Quess, but first and foremost it’s critically important to state right out of the gate that she fucking sucks. I did not think, after my assertion in in my ZZ review that Beecha Oleg was my least favorite character so far, that he would be so swiftly and definitively replaced by Quess Paraya, who in under two hours manages to create such a massive power gap between herself and any other character I would consider for this position, that I struggle to think of what it would take to displace her. A spoiled rotten brat with a frighteningly poor understanding of anything outside her own tiny bubble of experiences, who mistakenly believes she’s a Super Empath beyond reproach because she was taken in by a con artist- there has never been a more on-the-nose name than “Christina of India”- and as such, she does absolutely nothing but be a horrible clueless monster until the split-second before her death. But hating Quess seems to be the default stance for most people who’ve seen Char’s Counterattack as far as I can tell, so I don’t think I need to go much deeper into that. What really gets me is that, even now, I’m not sure whether or not I’m supposed to sympathize with her, because she’s such a tragedy.

The tragedy of Quess, within the narrative, is that she actually had nearly limitless potential. Despite what I said before, she was, in fact, a Super Empath- at the tender age of 13, Quess was one of the most powerful Newtypes we’ve seen in the Universal Century yet, being compared directly to Lalah during her early training and outperforming the overcharged Cyber-Newtype Gyunei in short order. The problem was that, due to the teachings of Christina of India, she seems to have believed that being a Newtype grants you inherently better understanding of other people, which isn’t actually the case. Instead, it grants you the ability to more readily receive the emotions of others, which can lead to better understanding, but she didn’t know how to process any of it due to her limited worldview. Had either Amuro or Char actually invested in helping her resolve her crippling issues with her father and misunderstanding of her own abilities, it seems to me that she could’ve become a major force for good, especially within the Earth Federation as the daughter of a high ranking politician. Instead, for all intents and purposes she was dismissed by Amuro, and Char, having strayed so far from his own ideals, opted to utilize her solely as a weapon instead. This ultimately resulted in her untimely death, and all that potential was reduced to nothingness.

The tragedy of Quess, as a viewer, is that even though I can identify all that, I can’t actually bring myself to feel bad for her. In recent years, I’ve come to give a lot more slack- arguably more than I should- to teenagers in fiction when it comes to annoying personalities and/or bad choices, because those are just part and parcel of being a teenager. Unfortunately, Quess surpassed my tolerance very much in the same way that Kamille did for the first half of Zeta, because she's completely stagnant for the entire movie. I also keep wanting to compare her to Reccoa, but for as bad as Reccoa was, there was at least the implication that her brazen shamelessness was a cope; furthermore, everyone who isn’t Scirocco (or Sarah, technically) is pretty open about calling her a garbage can of a human being for what she’s done. 

Quess never once takes a moment to consider what she’s actually doing, and the gravity of it never occurs to her, either. She supports Char’s “kill all life on Earth” plan well before she links up with him because she’s mad about her dad, and when Hathaway suggests that's not a good justification for causing a mass extinction event, the most consideration she can muster is “Iunno”. You get the sense that maybe she’ll have some kind of introspective moment when she discovers that the disarmament at Luna II was a lie, where Char’s dishonesty might rub her the wrong way considering the whole reason she joined up with him was because she was so angry about her father’s infidelity, but no. Even after her breakdown where she’s struggling with feeling all of the deaths during the battle at Luna II, which should give her even just a split second of hesitation about the mass extinction event she keeps trying to usher in, she’s back to her normal, intolerable self by the next scene. Even the appearance of Hathaway has no real effect on her until she suddenly develops the wherewithal to save him at the moment of her death, but seconds before that she was resolutely screaming about how he and the Earth needed to die, exactly as she believed when they first arrived at Londenion.

Additionally, it’s not at all reasonable to blame Amuro for not getting more involved in Quess’s wellbeing. Putting aside any of his own unexamined parental issues, he can’t be expected to drop everything to prioritize the welfare of a diplomat’s child that he barely interacted with to start, especially not when there’s a war threatening the entire population of Earth going on. As for Char… well, let’s move on to Char.

CHAR

The filmmakers were very bold with the way they chose to characterize Char in this movie, but I also think it was necessary for them to do what they did. At the surface level, he still comes across as cool as he ever was in previous appearances, but looking any closer than that reveals what a fucking loser the man has become. It’s important that they did that, because if you’re going to make him a villain again, you don’t want to have the audience sympathize with him, but they’re primed to do so because, you know, he’s Char Aznable, one of the most influential characters in pop culture. As such, the best way to get people to root against him, or at least not root for him, is to highlight the fact that as of this movie, Char has given up on everything he ever believed for the sake of petty revenge.

Technically, Char’s story was done at the end of Zeta. His meeting with Lalah shifted his focus from revenge on the Zabis to setting the stage for the arrival of Newtypes en masse, which he believed would usher in a new age of prosperity not just for mankind, but for the Earth itself. After all, it does make sense that as more and more people are born with the capacity to psychically feel each other’s emotions, there would be a concerted effort to improve the quality of life for everyone to minimize pain and suffering, and environmentalism goes a long way towards that. A lot of the final episode of Zeta is Char firmly asserting his willingness to wait for that promised time in the face of both Scirocco and Haman taunting him and, in Haman’s case, trying to bait him into taking immediate action. Hell, the very last thing he says to Kamille is that he’s not the one who’s going to be creating that better world.

Char’s Counterattack begins 5 years later with the very abrupt reveal that Char changed his mind: he’s not willing to wait for that promised time and he is going to be the one who’s creating that better world. This was alluded to during the conversation between Bright and Sayla near the end of ZZ, where they’re aware Char survived the Gryps Conflict and suspect that he’s plotting something, but it made sense for those two characters to be suspicious. Save for Amuro, they probably have the strongest insight as to what kind of person Char is. What makes less sense is how right they were, and how quickly he turned on his heel, because nothing in particular seems to have happened to push him so far, so fast. The war with Haman’s Neo Zeon revealed that even without the influence of the Titans, the Earth Federation remained deeply corrupt, and their corruption even spread to the AEUG in the absence of men like himself or Commodore Blex, but the response to those depressing revelations should not be “everyone’s gotta go”. And I don’t believe Char thinks so either, but what I do believe is that Char thinks it’s the best way to ensure Amuro winds up fighting him.

The crux of the problem with the idea that he’s trying to accelerate humanity’s evolution into Newtypes is the fact that

he knows

Newtypes can come from Earth. Literally, the

single most important person in his life

, Lalah Sune, was born and raised on Earth until she was 17. Quess, who again is remarked upon as being as gifted as Lalah

by Char himself

, never visited space until the events of this movie, and Char even talks to her about it. Even Amuro, despite being raised on Side 7, was also born on Earth and proved himself to be a more advanced Newtype than Char. Worse yet, he also knows that being a Newtype does not guarantee better, more compassionate people, because the

other

strongest Newtypes we’ve seen up to this point are Paptimus Scirocco and Haman Karn. Again swinging back to the end of

Zeta

, Kamille and Haman actually have a moment between them that could have led to a deeper mutual understanding, but she

violently

rejects the connection. At the end of the day, Newtypes are still people.

The biggest confirmation about why he’s really doing all this comes when he tells Amuro that he was the one who gave the psychoframe blueprints to Anaheim Electronics, to ensure that they would be evenly matched for their inevitable duel. There’s just no way to reconcile that with the actions of someone who genuinely had a greater goal in mind than settling a score. He even shows a total willingness to be deceitful by lying about the plans for disarmament at Luna II; the level playing field was just for Amuro. If this whole conflict really was about things as lofty as “shouldering the evils of humanity” and “eliminating the source of all wars within the Earth Sphere”, he wouldn’t give the person most likely to foil him the means to do so, especially considering the inevitable consequences of failure.

The icing on the pathetic cake is that the lie about a bigger picture seems to be mostly for him, much in the same way that the Quattro Bajeena disguise was also mostly for him. The only person we see buy into his philosophy is an impressionable 13 year old girl with no real comprehension of the scale and consequence of what he’s doing. The rest of Char’s Neo Zeon is made up of displaced spacenoids who just want stability, or politicians who’re hedging their bets on the legendary Char Aznable to get them into power. Even Nanai, who genuinely cares for Char, prods him multiple times with “yeah but you’re really just doing this because of Amuro Ray, right”.

I will give Char one thing, though. If the force ghost of my girlfriend who tragically died protecting me spent the last 14 years watching over me and telling me I’m a good, pure man, while simultaneously letting me know she’s also watching over my rival- the person she was protecting me from when she died- because they established a deeper and more meaningful emotional connection with each other in mere minutes than I ever was over the course of our entire relationship, I would probably also do something as insane as Char. And that’s without even touching on the fact that he was projecting his mommy issues onto her.

AMURO

I don’t have as much to say about Amuro as I did about Quess and Char, but something about the way he’s used in this movie doesn’t sit right with me. Specifically, it’s the way he constantly rebuffs Char’s grandstanding about how the people of Earth can’t change by saying of course they can, but they need to be guided. He’s ultimately proven right, because when he resonates with the psychoframe sample, he unwittingly manages to convince both regular Earth Federation and Neo Zeon troops to help push back Axis. Otherwise, though, it rings hollow, because we never get the impression Amuro has tried to do that up to this point.

Granted, I think it’s safe to assume that the reason Amuro fights for Londo Bell is because he’s still under the same tight scrutiny by the Earth Federation that he was during Zeta, meaning any attempt to get into political affairs would get nipped in the bud. It’s probably all he’s allowed to do other than sit in his mansion, and he’s presumably doing it because he trusts Bright won’t allow it to become the second coming of the Titans. That trust is well placed, because Bright insists on taking action despite Adenauer Paraya trying to keep Londo Bell out of the loop with Char. However, for how often Amuro dogged Char for not getting into politics during Zeta, you’d think he’d either find someone else to get into the Earth Federation that he could back, like Sayla, or even just a proxy to represent his beliefs, like Beltorchika. In the absence of action on his part, there’s a reading of this film that makes Amuro out to be a typical political moderate, which is a dire way for a hero like Amuro to be interpreted.

HATHAWAY

Long ago, before I started watching any of Universal Century Gundam, I made a jokey post asking if Hathaway was Bright’s failson. Having now seen Hathaway’s proper debut as a character (rather than just being a prop in Zeta)... well, kinda? Hathaway is very much the second coming of Katz, because his arc in this movie is nearly identical, with Quess playing the role of Sarah. The crucial difference is in how it ends, with Chan killing Quess, Quess protecting Hathaway at the last moment, and Hathaway, shockingly, murdering Chan in revenge. It also marks Hathaway as the first person to be completely wrong when talking about adults: his last words to Chan as he fired at her were “You grownups don’t understand. That’s why you’ll destroy Earth!”, but that has nothing to do with what happened. Chan didn’t sneak attack Quess while Hathaway was on the cusp of bringing her back, they were actively fighting each other. Quess even launched into an insane tirade about how Chan should’ve cleared out so she could’ve had Amuro’s attention.

I find myself not really sure how I feel about Hathaway. Like I said earlier, I’m willing to give a lot of slack to teenage characters, and a 13 year old not thinking about the consequences of his actions while overwhelmingly grief-stricken over the death of his first love he spent the whole movie trying to rescue deserves some of that slack. That reaction shot immediately after also suggests he understands the gravity of what he just did, but after that, the movie only briefly cuts to him to show that he’s still alive right after Axis gets blown in half, and then one last time during the credits. A single extra scene of him drifting, alone with his thoughts about what happened would’ve gone a long way in making this a non-issue. And maybe this is a weird thing to get hung up on, but I feel like all of my sympathy for the character would go out the window if the only part of this encounter that he reflected on was the fact that Quess died. So, I suppose this’ll have to wait until I get around to watching Hathaway to be resolved...

THE THEATRICAL FORMAT

A lot of my problems are rooted in the format of the story itself: even while clocking in at a little over two hours, film is a super limited way to tell a story. I understand that there are a number of reasons Char’s Counterattack was developed into a movie rather than, say, a series of OVAs or a television show. Movies carry with them a level of prestige that television has never had, and despite the popularity of the OVA format in Japan in the late 80’s, there’s surely no way they ever hit as wide an audience as a theatrical release, to say nothing of lost profits. For comparison, light research suggests that Megazone 23, an original story credited with proving the viability of the OVA format, made 1.7 billion yen, and Char’s Counterattack made 1.6 billion yen at the box office alone.

However, it’s really obvious that the story is pressing up against the constraints of the format. The movie is struggling to breathe from the start, with the reveal that Char is back, leading another revival of Zeon, and planning on dropping an asteroid on Earth. That’s a huge deal! But the movie doesn’t have time to linger on it and go into why it happened in the detail it deserves, because it has a lot of other things it needs to get to, and none of those get time, either. Maybe a lot of the stuff I’ve brought up so far is addressed in the High-Streamer novel that Char’s Counterattack is based on, but you shouldn’t need to read the screenplay’s source material to get the full picture. And just to be clear, I don’t hate the movie by any means, but the way things happen, and the pace at which they happen, is dramatically different than anything that’s come before, which is jarring.

I will say this: the Beltorchika’s Children manga is supposedly going to start releasing this summer (2022) in English, and I am extremely eager to see if this story is better served by a less constrained format, even if it’s not the exact same story.

OTHER OBSERVATIONS:

Despite elaborating on the depths to which Char has sunk in this movie, I still can’t believe his last words were about his heretofore unmentioned mommy issues, and even worse, he admitted it in an attempt to absolve himself of responsibility for the way he treated Quess. The “i’m literally neurodivergent and a minor??” of the Universal Century.

Speaking of pathetic men: in my notes, I made jokes about Cameron Bloom coming back and being a cuck, but in actuality he wound up with some pretty major character development since Mobile Suit Gundam. He seemed to have actually reflected on why Mirai left him and his own cowardice during the One Year War, and as a result was willing to risk life in prison to keep Londo Bell informed of Char’s backroom deal with the Earth Federation. Instead, the biggest cuck award goes to Gyunei Guss, who talks a big dick game about Char being a loser and a pedophile until he’s actually confronted by him, at which point his spine turns into spaghetti.

Also from my notes, here’s my live reaction to the design change the Noa family received:

For some reason, I always assumed Lalah was like… 13 or 14, so finding out she was actually 17 while browsing the wiki was a very pleasant surprise. It also makes Gyunei’s rumor that Char is a pedophile even more transparently lame.

The fact that Sayla doesn’t show up or even get mentioned in this movie is insane. Especially since she has a cameo in ZZ where she expresses concern about this exact situation happening! She would’ve slotted into Chan’s role perfectly, although that would’ve made the scene with Hathaway and Quess even more devastating. Beltorchika is also strangely absent, but her absence was apparently due to orders from Sunrise, which is why Tomino later wrote Beltorchika’s Children.

I was so happy to see my man Astionage, and to see that Astionage had a cool girlfriend, but then the girlfriend died, and then Astionage also died so abruptly that I initially didn’t realize he was dead, and then I thought Chan had killed him with the Re-GZ’s thrusters until I scrubbed the scene and realized it was a stray beam hit. My man survived getting tossed into space by Kamille’s dad at the start of Zeta to die here, like that? At least they didn’t feel compelled to kill Anna Hanna.

I mentioned it at the very beginning, but every mobile suit that shows up in this movie is a winner. The Nu Gundam feels like it was from the same boxier evolutionary branch as the Mk-II, instead of the sleeker Zeta Gundam, with the bonus of a cool set of asymmetrical fin funnels that look like a wing. The Sazabi feels like the final evolution of Neo Zeon mobile suit design philosophy, where it has the same chunkiness all the Neo Zeon mechs did in ZZ, but refined with a distinct silhouette of a real suit of armor, and that trickles down to the various Doga units. The Re-GZ, Jegans, and GM III’s are all also perfect grunt mechs.

It’s always been present, but I think Char’s Counterattack really cements how hilarious the Universal Century’s dummy technology is. Dummy asteroids, dummy mobile suits, dummy ships: everything has been made into a 1:1 scale balloon, and probably can be launched from the arms of a mobile suit.

In my ZZ review, I talked about how it goes completely unmentioned that Haman’s Neo Zeon was using Dias mobile suits, presumably made by Anaheim Electronics. I assumed maybe that had something to do with Chara Soon being left there, but this movie confirms that no, they’re just profiteering. This is now the third time I’ve brought this up and I guess I’ll keep banging the drum: I really hope something comes of this eventually. “Most of the weapons used to fight wars come from a single manufacturer” seems like something worth exploring, especially in a setting that’s really keen on criticizing political apathy and corruption!

The second time I watched the movie, I watched it dubbed, just to get that experience. Some thoughts on that:

I don’t like how the dub refers to the mobile suits without articles, as in “Gundam can do this” rather than “the Gundam can do this” The subs seem to alternate depending on the scene, but I prefer the “the”.

Some real baffling pronunciation during Char’s speech at Sweetwater, like Haman being pronounced “Hahmen” or Titans being pronounced “Tee-tahns”. The Zeta dub wasn’t recorded until 2 years after this one, but... Titans is an English word, guys.

Most of the dub cast is solid- I think Amuro, Char, and Quess are especially well-performed- but they made that critical mistake of hiring a guy to do Hathaway’s voice. To be fair, his voice actor, Bill Switzer, was only 18 at the time, so it’s not like he sounds comically old, just clearly older than 13.

I assumed the logo on the Nu Gundam’s shield was Londo Bell’s, but apparently it’s Amuro’s very own custom logo? He doesn’t seem the type to have something like that, but it is a really cool logo. What’s weirder, though, is that he’s now “the White Unicorn” when “the White Devil” is a way better name, racist implications be damned.

I feel like the most important thing you get from watching Zeta and ZZ before Char’s Counterattack is having your suspension of disbelief set appropriately for Amuro managing to stop Axis. The Zeta and Double Zeta Gundams’ biosensor activation in their respective finales are functionally magic, so the Nu Gundam possessing an even stronger version of that is like, yeah, this mech can totally push back an extinction-level event single-handedly due to a double supercharged psychic resonance cascade.

There's one bit of implied world-building that Char’s Counterattack inadvertently provides: the final piece of the Cyber-Newtype puzzle. If- as Hathaway talks about it- the reason Newtypes started to exist is because humans need a way to keep in contact with each across the vastness of space, then people who have their Newtype abilities awakened strictly for combat applications would need to find someone to bond with to satisfy that aspect of being a Newtype. It was Kamille for Four and Rosamia, Judau for Ple, Ple-Two, and Chara, Haman for Mashymre, and Quess for Gyunei.

I was pretty cold on it at first, but upon repeat listening, Beyond The Time is a pretty great ending theme.

It’s probably not intended to be as funny as I found it, but I love how Amuro slams Char’s cockpit into Axis and he just gets shaken like a snowglobe.

IN CONCLUSION:

Char’s Counterattack is kind of a bittersweet send-off to the “core” of the Universal Century. It’s designed to be bittersweet, in the same way Zeta’s ending was bittersweet, but I also mean bittersweet in that it’s my least favorite Gundam thing I’ve seen so far. Taken as a standalone action movie, it’s great, but when placed in the scope of the Universal Century’s ongoing story it just doesn’t sit right for a number of reasons. Like I said, maybe it’ll all feel more right when I read the version of the story presented in Beltorchika’s Children, but in this movie format, I’m ultimately a little disappointed.

In the course of writing all of this, I came to a very important realization: I am more interested in following up with Hathaway than I am about anything else Gundam-related right now. The way the movie left him has me burning with curiosity, but if I stick to my plan of watching everything in production order, there’s no way I’d get around to watching Hathaway until at least 2023. Combined with the urge to see the Xi Gundam in action considering I recently finishing building the gunpla, I don’t think I can hold out that long without soiling the experience in some way. So I’ve decided to compromise: with full intent to circle back, I’ll be skipping all the way from 1988 to 2010 with…

Next up: Mobile Suit Gundam Unicorn! The plan is to watch Unicorn, Twilight Axis - Red Trace*, Narrative, and then Hathaway. After that, I’ll circle back to War in the Pocket, which will also conveniently have me chronologically lined up for F91 and Victory. I’ll also start interspersing the non-UC shows whenever I feel like it, although I intend to watch those in release order as well (with the exception of SEED, SEED Destiny, and AGE, which are still in the maybe column).

*According to this little bumper that shows up before Hathaway, Twilight Axis is evidently not an important part of the story of the Universal Century, but I can spare a little under half an hour to see if that thing is as abysmal as I’ve heard.

#Gundam #Char's Counterattack #CCA #Mobile Suit Gundam #The Big Gundam Watch #anime #blu-ray #long post

[raeloganthesonic06fangirl]

As someone who only really likes Darkwing Duck casually, what's the deal with DDE?

Oooh, it's a bit of a can of worms. It's a 2011 comic "continuation" of the original cartoon storyline, which can basically be boiled down to "QuackerJack goes freaking nuclear after Negaduck ripped up Mr. Banana Brain and threw the pieces in his face, stages a coup of infrastructure power buy engaging in domestic terrorism, kidnaps his former friends and holds them against thier will, uses his best friend as a car battery, goes full Joker mode, strangles a robot with his bare hands until its scrap metal, starts presumably hearing voices more than we'd initially thought, holds an entire office floor hostage with the intent of hijacking a digital signal to enslave a significant portion of the population because he thinks video games have robbed them of thier free will so he thinks he's helping, sees some messed up stuff, is reduced to babbling helpless before ultimately deciding to off himself on his ex's doorstep, and in the original run of things, he comes back as a doll, but that's not canon anymore so the later comic revival short series just has him back to life for now real explanation other than it just happened."

More simply put, the comics is about 50% watching QuackerJack slowly and painfully lose any sense of grip he had left while acting out for someone to at least notice his suffering, but no one comes to help him, and he emotionally and mentally deteriorates rapidly at an alarming rate. Especially after making an effort to rehabilitate into normal civilian life.

A fair warning in advance, I'm about to get on a borderline rant for a second, but the final three paragraphs cool down after that. Don't take me too seriously, I'm just passionate about my faves.

Remember, this is supposed to be the same guy that made a functional time machine out of a spinning top to destroy yoyos in the medieval times because he thought it was competition.

There's two versions of the storyline: The more edgy retail release that's harder to find but is available for free reading online if you know where to look, and the "Definitively Dangerous Edition" which compiles 16 of the comic issues and the Annual special into a single omnibus, but omits the Ducktales crossover that includes him and the rest of the Fearsome being mutated into monstrosities.

But different versions, I do mean different in dialogue. The original has a more chilling atmosphere in which QuackerJack's word choice is a little more harsh and to the point, while the DDE softens the impact a bit but interesting creates a more disturbing take as he's left speaking in a slightly more childish manner (such as saying "They make things go kraka-thoooom." instead of saying "They blow up buildings." when referring to his personal bombs.)

He's also portrayed as not being able to adapt to a world that's constantly evolving, and his attempts are immediately dismissed by higher ups, and his attempts to find a better environment to thrive in are constantly thwarted for no reason other than "Screw this one guy in particular", I guess

There's emphasis placed directly on how isolated he was feeling, that his paranoia that the world was working against him was reaching a fever pitch, that his work in the QuackWerks company was under appreciated and his work was being credited to other people, and him working past work hours to show how serious he was with turning over a new leaf... It's just sad that he's described as "just snapp[ing]" under pressure.

Storywise, it's not necessarily a bad idea for a narrative, it just doesn't fit well with a universe that originally had such a loose grasp on continuity and QuackerJack especially being able to bounce back from each defeat back in the day. His words don't read like something I could imagine being spoken in the voice I've gotten used to with him. It feels like something masquerading as QuackerJack, or that someone else has taken the wheel and he's helpless to stop what's happening to him.

(And yes, for the rest of the sequence, Megavolt's subsequent appearances in the panels for this whole scene is teeth-gritted blank staring. Fun. </sarcasm>)

That's not to say that the original QuackerJack wasn't a bit of a grumpy but playful maniac to begin with, but this just feels like someone took the Joker aesthetic and ran fully with it without remembering that Toy Man (from the Superman series, look up the character, particularly the original comic one, it's very clear that he's part of QuackerJack's character influence) is an additional component.

The changes in the omnibus also affect the general storyline and some pieces are either lost in the shuffle or completely removed, such as this bit where originally, there was an acknowledgement on Darkwing's part in recognizing that QuackerJack's new behavior was very uncharacteristic and even abusive to Megavolt as QuackerJack used him as a fuel source for his car, despite knowing that taking electricity from Megavolt is painfully damaging to Megavolt. This piece was written out in the omnibus.

Again, the stories in this aren't exactly bad... In fact, these would probably be passable as decent fanfiction if they weren't something you had to pay money to collect.

On top of that, other characters are rather out of character, and even Negaduck gets this unfortunate treatment, as he's portrayed as needlessly cruel right off the bat, when in the original series, while he might have been domineering to his underlings and willing to wave weapons around in thier faces... He still was reasonably fair, such as demonstrated in "Just Us Justice Ducks", where he did intent to take all the cash, but was willing to divide control of the city evenly in four parts for each of his crew. Dude could have just taken the city as well, but he didn't, so I find it a little odd that he'd single out QuackerJack specifically to rub it in his face that he has limitations to how far he's willing to go

As much as I love QuackerJack as a favorite character to see making appearances, it's just a bit disturbing that the comics' plotline hinges entirely on his suffering and him acting out against that. If you removed QuackerJack from the plot entirely, a good 60% of the comics just collapses because it's mostly a chain reaction of QuackerJack deciding that he's sick of being a punching bag and now he's going to make everyone else cower in fear of him.

Even more disturbing is how after QuackerJack is technically MIA in the existence department, he still manages to make appearances as part of Darkwing's guilt nightmare/hallucinations, at one point even grabbing at Darkwing's cape to drag him into the proverbial pit with the rest of them.

QuackerJack is the only hand present in the hallucination here that belongs to basically a technically dead guy. QuackerJack has not been spoken about since his initial demise. That's freaking scary.

Also, the original plotline legit straight up let QuackerJack off himself.

No confirmation if he's mentally aware in that form, or just perpetually comatose until he's resurrected, but he's there, that's him, that's his body.

Also, an off note, but the 2016 comic revival that lasted 8 issues have a blink-and-you'll-miss-it part in a panel that has a news broadcast that heavily implies that QuackWerks was planning on monitizing his tragedy and release a set of toys based on his doll form, since there was chatter about interest in owning a QuackerJack doll.

He was going to have his "death" reduced to a hot Christmas collectible.

What did he ever do to tick off Taurus Bulba enough to get this level of harassment?

Oh, yeah, Taurus Bulba was also CEO of QuackWerks. Which is like a monolith of a company that took over the city for like a year or so.

For some reason, Taurus Bulba decided to make his life hell, even though they never met before this.

Anyway, I paid like $25 USD for my copy of the book, and about $16 USD for the ebook edition, mostly because it was interesting at first before I realized the underlying horror, but also so I can refer to these bits when trying to make a point.

The artwork is pretty good, tho. I have panel screenshots as my phone home and lock screen wallpapers. The ebook prints of them look crisp and make for a great layout for a phone wallpaper.

And the book is kind of a baseline important thing for my AU thing, so it's not as horrible as I'm probably making it seem. I'm just a fan, I don't have much standing in anything, and if you read it and found it a really good and thrilling ride of a comic, then more power to you, everyone likes things differently and that's why Fandoms are so fun when everyone has different opinions that are respected. 😗👍🏻

[hatterstan-shameblog]

Okay so Aguni is sound asleep, just enjoying the few hours of peace he has, when there's a knock on the door. He ignores it, but the person just keeps knocking and knocking.

"Morizono, open the goddamn door!" he hears Takeru call, "This is an emergency!"

He groans to himself before standing up and opening the door.

"What?"

"So, remember that weird chonky cat Niragi found?"

"Yeah... what about it?"

"It's not fat... and is not a cat."

Where Hatter and apparently every other idiot at the Beach mistake a domesticated pregnant genet for a fat exotic cat. And it just gave birth on Hatter's bed.

I have no idea in what direction this is supposed to go lol but hopefully something chaotic.

alright I had to look up what a genet is and DAMN they are CUTE AS HELL and I’m love them v much

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Terminator

Rating: PG-13 for dialogue and like one drug reference

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Aguni Morizono is a simple man who enjoys simple pleasures.

He enjoys a healthy slathering of grape jelly on his toast. He enjoys watching the sunset reflect over the ocean. He enjoys watering his garden and reading the newspaper and taking naps on the sofa on Sunday afternoons after he’s finished his grocery shopping for the week.

What he does not particularly enjoy is being shaken awake by a borderline-frantic Takeru in the middle of the night.

Takeru insists that he has a good reason; that this is an emergency. Aguni reminds him that running out of marijuana does not qualify as an emergency, and pulls the blanket over his head in an attempt to shut the very exuberant man out.

But the aforementioned exuberant man refuses to be shut out, and he references the aforementioned emergency again—this time insisting that it is an actual real emergency and requires immediate attention. Aguni sincerely doubts this and tries his damnedest to fall back to sleep—a truly Herculean task, given Takeru’s incessant talking and the way he’s bouncing on the other side of the mattress like some kind of weird large puppy. Aguni is just about to enter the first misty moments of dozing off as Takeru says words like ‘Niragi’ and ‘cat’ and ‘bed’ and it’s all somewhat possible to ignore until he utters one word that makes Aguni sit straight up.

‘Babies.’

Now, ‘babies’ as a concept does not bother Aguni. He’s actually somewhat fond of them, the way they unabashedly stare at him on the train or in the park, eyes wide and fat little hands waving a clumsy ‘hello’ in his general direction. And if he waves back sometimes, well...that’s his business. (It’s only polite, after all.)

No, the issue here is that ‘babies’ and ‘the Borderlands’ sounds like a terrible, terrible mix. What’s worse is that said babies have, for some reason, been left in Takeru’s care. And, judging from Takeru’s presence in his room, the babies have been left alone.

It takes no time at all for Aguni to throw on a pair of pants and slip into his boots. It takes even less time for him to grab Takeru by the collar of his robe and physically drag him down the hall, the other man switching between heartfelt thank-you’s and desperate pleas for Aguni to be gentle when handling the raw silk of his ensemble.

Now, to those of us on the outside of Aguni’s brain, it may seem like he hasn’t thought this through; that he has tunnel-vision’d his way through the last two paragraphs without a logical thought as to how and why ‘babies’ may be present. That is simply not true. Aguni has considered that ‘babies’ could actually mean a number of things aside from ‘human infants’ and has thus compiled a short list of the three most likely candidates:

The spider plant he had placed on Takeru’s windowsill has propagated—or, as some would call it, ‘had babies.’ This is Aguni’s favorite option of the bunch. It is also the least likely.

Something about the cards. Although Aguni has never Takeru refer to them as ‘his babies,’ it is no secret that he is very protective of his prized collection. Seeing as this may or may not affect the entire Beach, it’s important for him to be aware of the situation.

Takeru is high as a goddamn kite and hallucinating. This is, unfortunately, the most likely scenario.

It is also important to mention that Aguni has taken a good look at his life and his choices throughout this ordeal, particularly when Takeru commented on the state of his biceps and made an off-color insinuation about the right one looking slightly more defined than the left—and then asked if he would like to discuss his love life, with an exaggerated raise of his eyebrows. Aguni chose not to comment. He also chose to push Takeru into the doorframe on the way into his suite, and took a smidge of pleasure when his head collided with the wood with a satisfying clunk-ing sound.

“Look,” Takeru says proudly, pointing a finger at the bed, “babies!”

Nestled in what a bulging nest of fluffy white blankets are...things. Fuzzy things. One big fuzzy thing, with sleepy eyes and what looks to be a long spotted tail wrapped around one, two, three tiny fuzzy things. When Aguni leans in to get a closer look, the big one quirks a corn-chip-shaped ear and gives him a wary glare.

“What,” Aguni asks, “in the goddamn—“

But before Aguni is able to finish his sentence, Takeru is giving him a stinging slap on the arm.

“Aguni Morizono,” he hisses, hands balled into fists and perched on his hips like a mother hen, “I will not have my children exposed to that kind of language.”

There are plenty of things wrong with what Takeru just said, but Aguni is having trouble getting past the idea that these...creatures have somehow been claimed by his very silly friend.

“Think about it,” Takeru continues, swanning his way past a very confused (and tired) Aguni to sit on the edge of the bed just behind the brood of fluffy individuals, “This lovely lady could have given birth on anyone’s bed...but she chose mine.  Why do you think that is?”

“Because you leave the sheets all balled up in the middle and it’s the perfect place for an animal to make a nest?”

“Wrong, but I like how confident you sounded when you said it!”

With his hands pressed together and held in front of his lips, Takeru looks almost prayerful as he very seriously explains his theory.

“A woman alone-- heavily pregnant, scared, and lost in these cold and cruel Borderlands.  Her thoughts shift to her young.  Who will keep them safe?  Who will help take care of them?  That’s when her instincts took over,” Takeru opens his arms, the silken cuffs of his robe pooling around his elbows, “and, using her superior sense of smell, followed her nose to the den of the nearest alpha male for protection.”

Aguni wishes he could say that this is the dumbest thing he’s ever heard. He also wishes he had a cup of coffee (with a healthy glug of Bailey’s in there for good measure) before this whole event took place.

Takeru has since busied himself with the tiny new mother and her young, watching with gentle fascination as the newborns snuffle and snooze against her with unopened eyes and clumsy paws. When he reaches out a ring-bedecked hand to stroke along the bigger one’s head, she gives him a small growl and a pointed glare—to which he laughs and withdraws his touch, saying something cheeky about “the last time she let a man get too close” and quickly following it up with a promise to talk about it “after the kids are asleep.”

Takeru has just held up his hand for a high-five (which Aguni has decided to not reciprocate) when they hear a crash and then a bang and then the thundering thumpthumpthump of angry booted footsteps rapidly approaching their position in the bedroom. For some reason—a reason he’s not very keen to dwell upon at the current moment—Aguni instantly snaps into defense mode, hands curling into fists and shoulders squaring themselves in anticipation of a coming attack.

“WHERE. IS. TERMINATOR!?”

Niragi bursts into the room like a firework, all noise and flash and fire in his eyes. His knuckles strain around the dark of his rifle, ready to shoot at a moment’s notice. Of course, Aguni knows (hopes) he won’t actually resort to filling Takeru full of bullets, but he keeps a close eye on his trigger finger, anyways.

“Ah! There’s my co-parent,” Hatter says with a measure of glee, gesturing with a flourish of his hand towards the cute, hairy pile on his bed, “As you can see, our lovely Terminator is doing very well and—“

“Our? She’s not fucking ours, she’s fucking mine,” Niragi snaps, “and I’m gonna fucking kill you for stealing my cat.”

“Not a cat,” a calm voice says, and Aguni turns to see Last Boss lurking in the doorway, katana sheathed and arms crossed, “She’s a common genet, native to the savanna’s of Africa.”

“Ooh, does that mean the babies have dual citizenship? No, wait,” Hatter claps his hands together with glee, “triple citizenship? Africa, Japan, and the Borderlands?!”

“Africa’s not a country, it’s a continent, dumbass,” Niragi retorts, “and I think we have bigger problems than what’s going to be on their fucking passports.”

It’s probably not the best thing in the world for Aguni to let Takeru and Niragi descend into heated bickering—a back-and-forth of ‘you stole her’ versus ‘no, she chose me’—but Aguni is simply not interested in breaking up their squabbling. Instead he goes to stand by Last Boss, who’s watching the two long-haired men argue like it’s a mildly interesting tennis match.

“So,” Aguni says, “you, uh, seem to know a lot about those things.”

“I did my research when Niragi first brought her back,” Last Boss says calmly, “He’s good with her, but I wanted to make sure we were taking care of her correctly.”

“Did you know she was pregnant?”

“I had my suspicions. Niragi wouldn’t listen, though. Kept telling me she was just fat.”

“Yeah, I thought she was ‘just fat,’” Niragi interjects, his gun no longer pointed at Takeru but a murderous gleam still in his eye, “because this fucking asshole kept feeding her potato chips!”

“Because she loves them,” Takeru shouts back, throwing his arms up in the air, “So shoot me for being a nice guy and sharing my snacks with your weird cat!”

“Don’t,” both Last Boss and Aguni say in unison—which is very uncomfortable for the both of them, but at least it has the desired effect of keeping Niragi from blasting a few dozen holes through Takeru’s person.

With the two of them quickly getting back into their heated back-and-forth, Aguni turns his attention to the creatures on the bed. Somehow, despite all of the noise and excitement, the mother and her babies have curled up and fallen asleep, the rhythmic rise and fall of their bellies a stark contrast to the chaos unfolding around them. Aguni feels jealous, but also, feels bad about feeling jealous because this...Terminator thing has undoubtedly had a rough night, too.

“Luckily,” Last Boss says, “genets are pretty independent creatures. She’ll be fine to take care of the kits on her own, provided that she has access to food and water.”

“So we should just...leave her alone?”

Last Boss shrugs.

“More or less.”

Aguni sighs internally. He sighs externally, too, but the internal sigh is the one that really sums up his thoughts on the whole situation. Just getting one of those hot-headed men to leave those poor animals alone is challenging enough, but both of them? That’s bordering on ‘damn near impossible.’

But, for the sake of those weird fuzzy babies, he has to try.

Takeru jumps when he feels Aguni’s hand on his elbow. He also manages to shut up for a moment, which is a nice bonus. Last Boss has also sprung into action and seems to be talking to Niragi in hushed tones, a hesitant but friendly hand on his shoulder.

“C’mon,” Aguni says, gentle-firm as he guides Takeru into a standing position—much to the other man’s confusion.

“Mori, what—?”

“You’ve had a big night. I’ve had a big night. But do you know whose had the biggest night of us all?” Aguni gestures to the snoozing creatures in front of them, “Terminator. She’s exhausted, and the last thing she needs is the four of us keeping her up. You can stay with me tonight, and we’ll figure the rest out tomorrow.”

“But,” Takeru protests—an iota quieter, now that he’s realized that the pipe on the bed is now a sleeping pile, “we can’t just leave them alone, can we?”

“You’re right. Which is why,” Aguni says, “Last Boss is going to stay with her and keep an eye on things. If he’s okay with that, of course?”

Last Boss offers a solemn nod. Aguni makes a mental note to thank him for this later—maybe he’ll let him pick the music on their next supply run (provided it’s from Aguni’s list of pre-approved artists, of course...)

“You know what? Fucking fine,” Niragi spits, flicking his hair back with a quick jerk of his hand, “it’s too goddamn late to deal with you fucking losers, anyways. I’ll come back to collect my cat and her kittens in the morning.”

Aguni does not risk correcting Niragi on his incorrect terminology regarding his pets—frankly, he’s a little too busy being amazed at how suspiciously easy it was to get him to leave. With a sharp pivot, Niragi is exiting the room in what could be called a ‘brisk saunter,’ no doubt wanting to put as much distance between himself and whatever-the-hell just happened in this room as possible.

Aguni, for once, can relate to Niragi quite well.

With Last Boss keeping vigil over the new little family, Aguni is able to wrangle Takeru away from his room with minimal fuss. It’s probably because the man is very tired—despite multiple claims that he ‘isn’t sleepy yet’ and ‘can stay up for hours.’ This theory is proven when, within a grand total of seven seconds of Takeru flopping face-first onto the middle of Aguni’s bed, he’s managed to slip into what only can be described as a ‘light coma.’

Aguni manages to wrestle a stray pillow away from his sleeping friend’s grasp (he’s a notoriously cuddly sleeper, which has led to some...interesting situations over the course of their friendship) and settles his weary self onto the couch. It’s not quite long enough to accommodate his height, but it’s good enough for what will most likely end up being an extended nap before the sun comes up and he needs to solve whatever other issues have popped up at the Beach overnight.

...But, at least those problems won’t involve babies.

Probably.

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Also here is a common genet and DAMN SIS U CUTE AS HELL

#alice in borderland #danma takeru #alice in borderland netflix #aguni morizono #niragi suguru #last boss #writings and such

[vivisextion]

I first saw Slipknot at age 14.

No one knows how I managed it. I'm not sure I even remember. These days, you have to be 16 or 18 to get into Standing areas. I do know I had to buy tickets on the phone, back in the old days (2005, that is). A singular ticket, too - none of my friends, not even the classmate who had gone with me to see Linkin Park the year before, was that into Slipknot.

But I HAD to see them. This was the Subliminal Verses tour cycle, and Vol. 3 was my first and favourite Slipknot album, even to this day. It's the reliable old warm blanket for my soul whenever I need it. It's on right now, as I write this.

My memory isn't that good, but luckily I unearthed a livejournal (livejournal!) diary entry about the event I made the next day.

August 16, 2005. I went right after school. I went to a very conservative Anglican secondary school, too. I tried not to get caught in the bathroom, as I coloured my nails black with permanent marker (I know, don't laugh) and changed into my standard metalhead baby outfit - Slipknot band shirt, black cargo shorts, and my pride and joy: steel-toe boots I somehow managed to cajole my parents into letting me own.

I caught the bus to the open-air war memorial park where the gig was going to be. I got there at 4pm, 4 hours early. A couple other maggots were already hanging around. I found myself surrounded by tombstones, and I read them all. It was the middle of the Hungry Ghost Festival, too - a very fitting time for Slipknot to pay a visit to this godforsaken hellhole of a small town I lived in. (Especially given the paranormal circumstances surrounding the making of Vol. 3.)

While I wandered around the venue (no security or sound guys were around at all), I spotted two white vans pull up to the stage, in the middle of a clearing. It was them! I spotted Joey and missed him by a hair's breadth. I was quickly ushered behind the stone archway entrance by security then.

(Funnily enough, while walking around, I got mistaken for Joey more than once. I am the same height as him, had the same long black hair, same pale skin, and was wearing almost exactly what he had been. One person claimed from behind, I was a dead ringer, apart from when I turned around, and they realised I was Chinese.)

It was soundcheck time. A sound guy testing the mics would say random things, like "testing one two three two one.... fudge fudge, I like fudge...." The band even did Purity, so us earlybirds were given a rare treat, and we screamed along from the entrance, and drummed our fists on the sides of nearby porta-potties. I hope no one was in there at the time. Whenever we got a glance of any of them, we'd scream and cheer. Finally they left again, but were soon to return.

This was the first time I'd been a part of the metal community. I was barely allowed internet in those days. But here, random strangers were friendly, striking up conversations like they'd been friends for years. Two big guys, called Trevor and Ted, looked out for me the entire gig after, keeping other big dudes from crushing me too much (I'm 5'3, remember). Other people commented on me being so baby, because I was only 14, and said they would take care of me.

When we were finally let in, right after the usher cut the rope, I ran in, screamed "WOOOHOOO!" along with a few friends I'd made. I only briefly stopped to receive this RoadRunner Records compilation CD from a roadie, then resumed running like a madman screaming and dashing into the VIP cage.

I was right up against the barricade - the first time I would ever be at a gig. People from assorted magazines and press took photos of us, and I think I got my photo taken about 10 times at least.

(This is how I got in trouble with my parents the next day. My photo had ended up in a local paper - you can see examples of that here. They had no idea what I'd been to see the night before, and were horrified when they saw what Slipknot looked like.)

We saw Sid filming us from the stage with a camcorder and screamed at him. We saw Jim and screamed at him too, and he flashed the victory sign back at us. I remember Metallica playing at the time, another one of my favourite bands.

The concert was a brutal religious experience I will never forget. People with their arms outstretched, crying and screaming out loud, moving like the devil possessed them.

The new friends around me made sure I was alright after every song! There were huge guys fainting behind us who had to get carried out, but I endured, a tiny 14 year old child. We got a family speech as per tradition, of course. "Are you guys out there all looking out for each other? We're all one big family, and we gotta look out for each other." What Corey said held true - strangers hugged, shook hands, talked, and made friends. I was heartened by how close-knit the maggot community was. It really did feel like a family, and it's felt like that ever since.

Of course, I did my first Jump The Fuck Up. It is possibly the most euphoria I've ever experienced all at one go. (Later, in 2020, I was extremely disappointed that I didn't get to do it again in London.)

They did the death masks for Vermilion, and I remember Chris helping Sid fix his mask and shirt when they'd changed back. Sid hung out near Clown's drums for most of the time too, and hugged him from behind and just latched on at one point. It was pretty adorable.

Fun fact: The version of Eyeless you hear on the 9.0 Live album is from Singapore, as is Eeyore. There are very few photos and videos from the crowd of this gig, because in 2005, very few people had camera phones. The crowd at the Slipknot gig in 2020 was a sea of arms with phones, filming the gig rather than experiencing it. Yes, I'm going to be that cranky old geezer who complains about the good old days.

Joey as usual, was fucking amazing and never failed. However, due to the fact that I was right up front, only his tiny head was visible behind his vast drum set, I couldn't see him the entire gig.

Amazingly, the government told Slipknot they were not allowed to do obscene gestures, curse, vomit (possibly due to the decomposing crow pre-show ritual), simulate humping on objects, throw faeces, or jump off stage (looking at you, Sid). I don't think our totalitarian government knew who they were dealing with, because watch what happens next.

Near the end of the gig, Corey tells the crowd “your government has given us a laundry list of things we aren’t allowed to do, your government has told us we are not allowed to swear”. Crowd goes “BOOOOOOOOO” and Corey goes “BUT WE DON’T GIVE A FUCK!!” And they launch into Surfacing, the last song. Everyone riots. Best night of my life.

You can find the setlist from that gig here. It had everything I wanted and more.

This story later got immortalised when Kerrang asked maggots for gig stories, for an article which came out in 2020. I had forgotten entirely, until people began messaging me to tell me, and one friend sent me a scan of it!

On the way out, I managed to get a shirt. I remember calling my best friend at the time, and got everyone at the merch booth to go "IF YOU'RE 555 THEN I'M 666" for her. This shirt has since been lost to the landfill, because my Christian mother took it upon herself to dispose of it the first opportunity she got. Needless to say, our relationship is not very good.

After that, I even managed to get that Roadrunner compilation album they were giving out signed. The band was staying at the Carlton. Unfortunately, Joey wasn't there, neither was Clown, and Mick was swarmed by guitar nerds so, 6/9 it is. It is a great regret of mine that I'll never have anything signed by him, nor will I ever get to see him perform ever again.

The next day, I went to school, my head swimming. Yes, I went to see Slipknot ON A SCHOOL NIGHT. I was a giant bruise, from my ribs and my chest, to my hips and knees, from being slammed into the barricade like a screen door in a hurricane. Most of all, my sore, headbanged-out neck could barely hold my head up. Classmates thought I had been in a fight. I was torn between battle-scarred exhaustion and hyperactive ranting about the most amazing gig of my short life (it still is, to this day). When teachers spoke to me, I wanted to reply, "Fuck trigonometry! I've just seen SLIPKNOT. Do you not understand that my world is different? Do you not understand that *I* am now different?"

My country was a small, conservative town that Slipknot had graced with their unholy presence. Corey Taylor once said that where he grew up in Iowa had a way of making a 16 year old boy feel like a 36 year old man (or something to that effect). I felt that in my weary bones as a teenager, being from a place just like that. Years later, Watain would run into worse trouble, and wouldn't even be allowed to perform. The Christian stranglehold is stronger than ever. It was a good thing that back then Slipknot had the element of surprise, striking serpent-fast and choking this society by the neck for a too-brief time, before they departed.

After that, my desire to play the drums only grew like a weed. Joey Jordison had, has, and will always inspire me as a drummer, and seeing the beast live (or what little I could spy behind the massive riser) had only spurred me on. I had always been a noisemaker, be it driving my parents mad with chopsticks on pots and pans, or driving my teachers mad with pencils on my desk. But of course, my parents wouldn't have any of it. I'd have to wait a good 14 more years before I'd be able to afford lessons and later, a kit of my own. Better late than never, right?

There will never be enough words to describe the impact Joey has had on my life. And it isn't just Slipknot, either. I could write another essay on his time with the Murderdolls and its influence on my own gender-non-conforming ways. Suffice to say, my wardrobe doesn't look too dissimilar to his during the early Dead in Hollywood days.

I told my boss I could not come into work today. I was grieving. I said that my music teacher died, as I didn't think she'd understand the magnitude of my loss. In a way, it's true. And I am not the only one Joey has nudged on the path to being a musician, that much is certain. To the rest of us, I wish strength and love for you in this difficult time. The best way to honour Joey, who truly loved music, both the creation and appreciation of it, is to pass that gift on. Teach it to someone. He is the reason I picked up the sticks in the first place, and one day, they'll be handed on, the heavy metal baton for the next generation.

And finally: remember that the ones we have lost are never truly gone.

Vinnie

P.S. See if you can spot me in the crowd photos in this post!

#Joey Jordison #Slipknot #Murderdolls

[midzelink]

People of Shadow: Who Were the Twili’s Ancestors, Really?

The speculation surrounding the mysterious origins of the Twili in Twilight Princess is far from a new topic amongst fans of the series; I distinctly remember staying up late into the night scrounging around old forums in my early teens, ingesting thread after thread on the very subject, hoping against hope that someone smarter than me would at last have found the truth amidst the lies.  Those kinds of analyses, the pure intrigue that leads to hours of reflection and research, has long been one of the series’ drawing points for me; that no matter how cracked and inconsistent the story Nintendo has chosen to weave, fans of the series will again and again use everything at their disposal to fill in the cracks.    

If you’re reading this, it’s highly likely you’re familiar with the the two most common theories: that they were either Sheikah or Gerudo (though the evidence I’ve seen for the latter has always been shaky at best). When you get right down to it, it’s not as if who the Twili once were really matters - it’s certainly something Nintendo didn’t give more than a few seconds thought - but speculating is fun, and something on which I’ve spent much more time than I’d like to admit.  Though the reality, of course, could simply be that they were no one, just a hodgepodge group of dark magic users, never before seen, I always found myself asking: If they were anybody, who would they be?  Is there any in-game evidence to suggest as much?  I would argue that yes, there is - and though what I’ve written here is hardly groundbreaking, it is fairly comprehensive, and with any luck, I’ll be able to convince a few of you along the way.

With all that out of the way, I would at last like to state that, if anyone, I firmly believe the Twili’s ancestors were Sheikah, and I’ve done my best to compile my reasoning for this below.

The Banishment of the “Interlopers”

Before we get into specifics, I wanted to lay some groundwork establishing when, exactly, the Twili’s ancestors were banished by the Light Spirits at the behest of the gods, as the timeline of events will be important in a moment.  In Twilight Princess, we first hear about the dark interlopers and their quest for the Sacred Realm from Lanayru; there was an era of peace in Hyrule, but when word of the realm and the holy triangles within it spread, war broke out amidst the populace.  From within this greed-fueled chaos arose the interlopers, “wielding powerful sorcery” - and so great was their transgression against the goddesses that they ordered the Light Spirits to seal them away in shadow forever. (If the story of a war breaking out over the Sacred Realm sounds familiar, that’s because the Hyrulean Civil War, which ended shortly before the events of Ocarina of Time, shared the same conflict; it’s entirely possible that the two wars were one and same or overlapped in some fashion, but for this post specifically, that possibility isn’t entirely relevant.)

This era of strife is colloquially referred to as the Interloper War by many, and from Lanayru’s tale alone we can extrapolate that, at the very least, the banishment of the Twili happened before the events of Ocarina of Time; the struggle was fought over the Triforce, after all, which was claimed and broken apart in all three splits of the timeline following the events of that game.  It’s also important to note that Ganondorf was banished to the Twilight Realm shortly after the events of Ocarina of Time in the Child Timeline, and that this was long after the Twili’s ancestors had been banished there; so it can be said conclusively that the Interloper War could not have taken place between the events of Ocarina of Time and Twilight Princess.

The Sheikah, Few and Far Between

It was important that we establish a rough estimate of when, exactly, the Twili’s ancestors were banished for one very crucial reason: to shed some light one who they likely weren’t, and who they could have been.  At some point before the events of Ocarina of Time, there was a mysterious group of dark magic wielders known only as “the interlopers” that, all at once, were banished to an alternative dimension - an act that, had there been any of their tribe left behind, likely would have put a serious strain on their numbers.  And within Ocarina of Time - a game that takes place after this banishment would have occurred - we learn of a tribe who suffered one such fate:

“They say that Princess Zelda's nanny is actually one of the Sheikah, who many thought had died out.”

As we all know, Impa is the only Sheikah present in Ocarina of Time - I would argue not quite the last, if Impaz in Twilight Princess is any indication - but regardless, they are so few and far between that the general populace had one point believed them to be extinct.  Things weren’t always this way; at the very least, we can extrapolate that there were a great many Sheikah around the time of time of Skyward Sword, and even within the context of Ocarina of Time, Kakariko Village was in relatively recent history a Sheikah village that was closed off to the common people.  What truly happened to the Sheikah that drove them to near extinction is anyone’s guess, but I would argue that it was likely a combination of two things: 

the Hyrulean Civil War, which lasted very, very long, had many casualties, and the Sheikah (being in service to the Hyrulean Royal Family) were likely at the forefront of this, and

on top of this, perhaps before or even coinciding with the Civil War, a not unsubstantial number of the Sheikah broke off from their tribe, betrayed the Royal Family, and tried to claim the Triforce and the Sacred Realm as their own.

Of course, this relies on the assumption that the Sheikah could ever, under any circumstances betray the Royal Family - betray Hylia, the goddess whose bloodline it is supposedly their sworn duty to serve.  And though I will not be touching on this quite yet, I did want to bring it to attention, as it is overall a crucial piece of the puzzle - but we have some more ground to cover first.

(As for what I meant in the beginning of this segment when I said who they likely weren’t, I was specifically referring to the Gerudo, a people who many others speculated could have been the the Twili’s ancestors.  While it’s true that the Gerudo people have mysteriously vanished by the era of Twilight Princess, they are very much present in Ocarina of Time - and we have established that the banishment of the Twili’s ancestors occurred before the events of that game.)

Beings of Shadow, Enter the Twilight Realm

When all is said and done, the coincidental timing of both the banishment of the interlopers and the dwindling numbers of the Sheikah isn’t quite groundbreaking evidence of anything; after all, it would not be completely out of the realm of possibility that the Hyrulean Civil War had been entirely at fault for their dwindling numbers.  However, given what we know about how twilight affects ordinary denizens of the world of light, I would argue that Sheikah may have been the only group of people capable of becoming the Twili, and it is for this reason that I feel assured in my conclusions:

“Twilight covered Hyrule like a shroud, and without light, the people became as spirits.  Within the twilight, they live on, unaware that they have passed into spirit forms...”

This twilight - the very glow that transforms the unawares citizens into spirits and Link into a beast - is the very same “light” that pervades the Twilight Realm, and it can only be assumed that any ordinary light dwellers banished there would also become as spirits. Yet in the case of the Twili’s ancestors, this emphatically was not the case; they were able to persist, evolving over time to become the Twili we know and love today. When Midna is explaining to Link the history of her people after the duo enter the Gerudo Desert, she says this:

“What do you think happened to the magic wielders who tried to rule the Sacred Realm? They were banished. They were chased across the sacred lands of Hyrule and driven into another realm by the goddesses... Its denizens became shadows that could not mingle with the light.”

And after Link retrieves the Master Sword, breaking the curse that Zant placed on him:

“This thing is the embodiment of the evil magic that Zant cast on you.  It's definitely different from our tribe's shadow magic...”

It’s clear that the Twili and their ancestors had and continue to have a very strong connection to shadow.  We know that anyone from the world of light who enters the twilight becomes as a spirit; not even wielders of the Triforce are exempt from its effects, though it does, admittedly, affect them in different ways.  (Zelda is the one clear exception to this, an anomaly which I go over in this post - a short and recommended read before continuing.)  Just as the Twili, a people of shadow, cannot mingle in the world of light, people of light cannot mingle in the world of shadow - but the Twili are hardly the only people in the series to have a strong connection to the shadows.

"Have you heard the legend of the ‘Shadow Folk’? They are the Sheikah...the shadows of the Hylians.”

The Sheikah, time and time again, are referred to as people of shadow; Impa awakens as the Sage of Shadow, and the accursed Shadow Temple lies on the outskirts of her hometown of Kakariko.  We know that the twilight affects all whom it touches in the world of light - “light and shadow can’t mix, as we all know” - but what if the light dweller in question were a Sheikah?  How could a realm of shadows snuff out the light of one who is already a shadow?

I would like to posit, then, that even if the Twili’s ancestors had been a mixed bag of peoples and cultures drawn together by the lure of the Sacred Realm, only a people like the Sheikah - a tribe who had perfected mastery over shadow magic, so much so that they had become one with them - would have been able to persist in the anti-light of the Twilight Realm and, over centuries or perhaps millennia, evolve to become the Twili.  Anyone else would have simply become spirits upon entering the realm, doomed to spend the rest of their days neither alive nor dead.

Eyes of Red, Show Us the Truth

Now, there is one other crucial piece to this puzzle, and it revolves around one other trait that the Sheikah are known for: with the exception of Breath of the Wild (the disparity of which I have my own theories about, but I won’t get into that here), they all have red eyes.  This is something that’s never really commented on in any of the games, but it’s an important enough physiological trait that Sheik, who is merely Princess Zelda in disguise as a Sheikah, also bears the distinctive eye color.  Though it’s common knowledge that Midna’s eyes are also red (as are the rest of the Twili’s), this alone doesn’t speak much to a correlation between the two peoples; no, in order for this parallel to mean anything, we must first understand the significance of the Sheikah’s red eyes, and how exactly that ties back to the princess of twilight and the rest of her people.

First, let’s take a look at Ocarina of Time.  When Kakariko Village is attacked just before Link heads for the Shadow Temple, Sheik has this to say about Impa:

“The evil shadow spirit has been released! Impa, the leader of Kakariko Village, had sealed the evil shadow spirit in the bottom of the well... But the force of the evil spirit got so strong, the seal of the well broke, and it escaped into the world!! I believe Impa has gone to the Shadow Temple to seal it up again...”

Anyone who has played Ocarina of Time knows that the Shadow Temple is a dark and wicked place, teeming with the souls of the undead and illusions that, without the ability to see through, would completely inhibit any progress one would try to make.  As Link traverses the temple, he bears the Lens of Truth: a peculiar artifact (importantly, in the shape of a Sheikah Eye) that reveals the world as it truly is.  It is a one-of-a-kind item, and without it, no ordinary person would be able to make it through the Shadow Temple, much less fight the invisible monsters that lurk within - but Impa is no ordinary person.

The explanation is really quite simple: the Sheikah’s red eyes are not merely a distinguishing, but purely aesthetic characteristic (like the red hair of the Gerudo), but are indicative of the fact that they can see through even the strongest of illusions with the naked eye.  It’s the reason the Lens of Truth was crafted in their image; though one who wields the lens may not be a Sheikah, they, too, can view the world as one with this powerful artifact, seeing through artificial walls, finding invisible items...and even meeting the spirits of the departed.

Let’s go back to Midna; after you first meet her in the sewers of Hyrule Castle, slowly making your way to the rooftops and the imprisoned Zelda beyond, you encounter several spirits of Hyrulean soldiers along the way.  Midna taunts you, saying this:

“It looks like the spirits in here... They're all soldiers.  Where in the world could we be? Eee hee!”

As a beast, Link is now able to tap into his new “animal senses” to see that which would be invisible to his human eyes. Yet Midna is able to see the spirits as they are, naturally, without any aid whatsoever - almost as if she retained the truth-seeing eyes of her ancestors.

Before we move on, I did want to bring attention to one other thing the Twili and the Shiekah have in common - and though it’s not technically directly related to their shared ability to see the truth of the world around them, it is tangentially related in the sense that it involves illusions.  Early on in Twilight Princess, there is a scene where Midna seemingly transforms herself into Colin and subsequently Ilia, taunting Link about the capture of his friends.  It’s a somewhat strange occurrence that happens exactly once and is never brought up again, and it happens so early in the game that, for a very long time, I simply brushed it off and never gave it a second thought.

However, I think it’s pretty safe to say that what we’re seeing here is a demonstration of illusion magic - Midna is not literally shapeshifting into Link’s friends, as if she had this ability, she could simply return herself to her true form at any given moment.  This is significant because there is a fairly notable example of something identical to this in the very game I mentioned earlier in this segment; in Breath of the Wild, the Yiga Clan, a group of Sheikah who swore allegiance to Calamity Ganon, consistently over the course of the game demonstrate the ability to use illusion magic, posing as weary and lost travelers on the road, waiting to ambush Link and take him by surprise.  And though the Yiga may not technically be Sheikah anymore, they were at one time - and I find it exceptionally hard to believe that such a technique would be exclusive to the Yiga and the Yiga alone.

Echoes of the Past

I would, of course, be remiss to not touch on the various architectural and technological similarities between the two peoples.  On their own, they aren’t very substantial pieces of evidence - but if we have already accepted the fact that the Twili’s ancestors were, in fact, Sheikah (which, for the purposes of the rest of this essay, I will now do), then it is worth it at the very least to take a look, to paint a somewhat fuller picture of the story.

Take, for instance, the runes in the above photo, adorning the wall behind the throne in the Palace of Twilight.  Similar runes adorn the cloak that Midna wears while in her true form, and other miscellaneous places scattered throughout the palace.  It is not that much a stretch to say that the large emblem in the center is somewhat reminiscent of the iconic Sheikah Eye, though distorted and changed over time as it may have become.  An eye that is unmistakably Sheikah in inspiration even appears on the back of the Fused Shadow, and it is for this reason that I chose that image to head this essay to begin with.  But eyes aside, by far the most significant comparison once again returns us to Breath of the Wild, and the Sheikah as they were ten thousand years past.

The ancient-yet-highly-advanced Sheikah technology scattered across the once mighty kingdom of Hyrule in Breath of the Wild simply oozes Twili, from the harsh, blue aesthetic to the angular similarities between the script of the Sheikah and the runes of the Twili.  And while it is worth mentioning that this is decidedly technology, and not magic,  there is an argument that can be made in the world of fantasy over whether there is in fact a significant difference; looking at the image below of a room in the Palace of Twilight, floating platforms decorated in patterns resembling circuitry, it’s not hard imagine that this is nothing more than highly advanced tech, remnants of a history they left behind.

At the end of the day, it doesn’t especially matter whether either is a case of expressly magic or technology; all we can extrapolate from this information is that the Sheikah who had been banished to the Twilight Realm likely had some rudimentary knowledge of their tribe’s lost technology, had they been banished in an era when it already was lost - or, at the very least, had the same design sensibilities.  Whatever the case, it is worth is to try and acknowledge the potential connection, as there is much that can be gleaned by examining the world around us and its history - even a fictional one - and to that end, I would now like to begin wrapping up this unnecessarily long piece of persuasion by doing just that.

Those Who Do Not Learn From History...

...are doomed to repeat it, as the saying goes.  Taking everything I’ve written here into consideration, it’s not hard to construe a conceivable timeline of events that could have led to the birth of the Twili, and the eventual invasion of the world of light headed by Zant.  Long ago, in an age ravaged by a war over a lust for the Sacred Realm, a sector of Sheikah betrayed the Hyrulean Royal Family, split off from the main clan, and sought their own power - and if the story of a Sheikah betrayal sounds at all familiar, that’s because it emphatically is.

Breath of the Wild is an anomaly in many respects; it seems to defy all expectations of what we understand about the timeline, reviving a people (the Sheikah) who, for all intents and purposes, died out long ago - but it paints a very important picture of what the Shadow Folk had to endure serving underneath the Royal Family of Hyrule, a picture that elucidates precisely why such a betrayal would conceivably take place.  The story of the Yiga Clan is, ultimately, one rooted oppression - and though I could go into great detail about the nature of this oppression here, and quite frankly the justification for their cause, I’ve already done so in this post, which I would again encourage be read by anyone who cares about the subject.  Very basically, the Yiga were right - having been cast out and mistreated by the very family they served, they did the only thing they could, and turned against them.  Glimpses of this mistreatment are riddled in previous entries of the series, but no more jarringly than in Ocarina of Time’s Shadow Temple: a place that likely was once a sacred place to the Sheikah people, reduced to nothing more than a haunted torture chamber recounting Hyrule’s “bloody history of greed and hatred" under direct orders by the Royal Family.  In Twilight Princess, Zant specifically refers to Link as “one of the light dwellers who oppressed [their] people” while talking to Midna at Lanayru Spring - and though I would not go so far as to say that Zant was completely justified in his actions, perhaps he had a point.  Perhaps the story of the Twili’s ancestors isn’t one of a an evil, mindless group of powerful interlopers who sought power for power’s sake - but one of fierce retaliation.  One of a group of people who had soiled their hands with the blood of the Royal Family one final time and said enough.  I believe that the Twili’s ancestors were Sheikah, and I will continue to believe it until proven otherwise; for all the reasons listed above, and also because, frankly, if I were a Sheikah, I would betray the Royal Family, too.  It happened once - so it will happen again - and again, and again, until the cycle of violence and oppression is studied and learned from, and the truth comes out.

But then, so long as history is written by the winners, it will take more than the red eyes of a Sheikah to parse the truth from the lies.

#twilight princess #ocarina of time #sheikah #twili #yiga #breath of the wild #midna #impa #loz meta #legend of zelda #tloz #loz #analysis #this is actually a heavily revised and edited version of an essay from earlier last year #but that was back when this blog was new and also it was bad #i'm a lot happier with how this one came out! #text #mywriteups* #myposts*

[peach-pops]

Hello! Do you remember "Dating a Hothead/easily angered girlfriend" blog from anonymous? Can I request for Akaashi, Kageyama, Ushijima, Sugawara, and Tsukishima of how will they react to their s/o? Thank you! I really really really love that blog! It really reminds me of me of being sassy 😂. Anyways, sorry for bothering you *bows*

Author’s note: UGH Im so sorry this took me so long to get out! I only did Kageyama and Akaashi cause I wanted a bit of a contrast hope that’s okay! Also, I wanna point out that there’s nothing wrong with defending yourself, even if things do get violent. I don’t condone violence I’m just saying to protect yourself in the best way possible! 

Here’s the first part!

Akaashi and Kageyama with a Hotheaded Girlfriend

-Akaashi-

Akaashi knows how angry you get so he always does his best to try and make sure everything goes smoothly to avoid any casualties

BUT Akaashi can’t control every little thing and he realizes this fairly early in your relationship

I’m a full believer that Bokuto loves raves and clubbing and because of this, he usually drags you and Akaashi along

One night you three and a couple of other Fukurodani members are out clubbing and immediately, Akaashi surveys the room: where are the exits? Where’s the bathroom? Which group looks like trouble? Where did his girlfriend and best friend go???

He spots a group of girls near the bar that are a part of a bachelorette party who are a bit rowdy but he kinda brushes them off cause there’s nothing threatening about six girls wearing cheap wedding veils

You guys get your own private table in the corner ( bless Konoha and his connections) and after an hour or two of drinking and dancing, you take the initiative to go buy the next round of drinks cause that’s just club etiquette and you’re lowkey ballin

Let’s get it miss independent !!!! 😤 😤 😤

Akaashi offers to go with you but you tell him to watch Bokuto cause he might bust his head from dancing on the table

Once you make it to the bar, you decide just to order a pretty expensive bottle for the table because you’re not confident in your ability to carry six shots back without spilling it everywhere

You pay for the bottle and start making your way back to the table when you see the bridal party from earlier hanging out at your table. You see two girls laughing side by side with Bokuto (ok my dude get some) BUT THEN you search for Akaashi and sure enough, you see him visibly uncomfortable as the ‘soon to be bride’ tries sitting in your mans lap.

Akaashi looks up and he’s conflicted cause he wants your help to get this drunk girl off of him but he also knows you’re crazy and you might kill her in the process

“ Your hair looks so sexy pushed back! Has anyone ever told you that before?”

“ Please go away, my girlfriend is coming and she won’t be happy-”

“ Aw girlfriend? No fair why are the cute ones always taken?”

“ Aren’t you getting married?”

You’re gripping the bottle so tight in your hands and Akaashi can see it in your eyes that you are soooo close to hitting this bitch over the head with the bottle

He already knows exactly what you’re thinking and he’s pleading with you not to just with his eyes

Would you kill a girl over sitting in your mans lap? Yeah probably I mean you were fucking crazy

BUT since you could see how serious Akaashi was, you loosened your grip on the bottle and placed it on the table. Before the bride could even look over, you had already lightly nudged pushed her off of Akaashi’s lap and sat down on your boyfriend as if to claim him

“ What is your problem, you didn’t have to push me!” The bride whined as she got off the floor but you kept your glare on her

Akaashi squeezed your thigh to try and calm you down but maybe it was because of the alcohol so you just clenched your fists even tighter

“ You’re lucky all I did was push you. I can’t believe you’re about to get married and you’re trying to straddle my fucking boyfriend!”

Akaashi can feel how tense you are so he sits you on the inside of the booth so he can be in the middle between the girl and you. At this point, you’re sitting next to Bokuto and he’s laughing nervously cause he’s never seen you act like this before but he’s a ride or die so hes automatically team Y/N

“ Are you threatening me?”

“ Yeah, I am. What are you going to do about it?”

“ Y/N stop-”

“ Yeah, listen to your boyfriend bitch.”

“ WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING A BITCH?!”

Before you can lunge over the table, Akaashi keeps his arm out and blocks you from doing so. He turns to the girl and bows his head, trying not to let his own anger consume him,” I think you should leave.”

“ And what if I don’t want to?” The soon to be bride pokes bitterly as she attempts to wrap her arm around Akaashi’s shoulders,” what is your girlfriend gonna do, hit me?”

She’s right, you can’t launch yourself across the table and your arm doesn’t have the reach but you had alternatives. You grabbed a half-drunken glass of some brown rum and you flung the alcohol into the girls face

Everyone at the table was SHOCKED, lowkey including you cause you didn’t even mean to throw the drink in her face it just happened YOU SWEAR it was just an instinct

Who could blame you I mean you were so mad plus you had been watching so many compilations of “ Best Housewives Fights from Bravo” that it was the first thing you could think of

Akaashi, bless him and his brilliant mind, immediately blocked your body with his because the soon to be bride tries climbing into the booth to beat you up and Bokuto also has a protective grip on your wrist to stop you from killing her

LUCKILY before you could spill any blood, security comes and forces the girl to leave your table

At first, you thought Akaashi was mad at you so you kind of pout and tell him how sorry you were but Akaashi doesn’t even care he just makes sure you’re okay

In his head, he knows maybe you were in the wrong for pushing the girl but he would never admit it outloud cause he values his life

My heart swoons for this man

Bokuto on the other hand is slapping your back and shaking your shoulders going,” Holy crap Y/N that was AWESOME!!!”

-Kageyama-

You and Kageyama had only recently started dating so he probably doesn’t have any idea how mad you could get. He’s seen a few times where you’ve gotten upset over school or your family problems but he still didn’t think too much about it

Who was he to be put off at having an easily angered s/o when he was balancing between his own emotions?

Anyway! You were one of Karasuno’s managers and you and Kiyoko got SO CLOSE! The job was super easy and it meant you could spend more time with your boyfriend so win-win!

The only part that was ever hard for you was other guys constantly hitting on you and Kiyoko like damn okay you both were hot as hell but at least treat girls with respect?

You didn’t mind guys telling you that you both were pretty caused duh you two already knew that but most of them were SOOO disgusting and you never let it slide

Before one of Karasuno’s games, you were on the sidelines with Kiyoko chatting about the next match when you could hear some of the guys from the other team trying to get your attention

“ Damn, Karasuno girls really are as fine as they say, they look soooo good.”

“ God, the things I would do if I was alone with them.”

“ I know you two can hear us, turn around so we can see what we’re working with.”

You just kept your eyes locked onto your clipboard because you didn’t want Kageyama to see how fucking crazy you could get but JESUS it was so hard when these two guys were harassing you

“ Kiyoko, I will fucking lose my mind if they come over here. I think I’m going to snap someone’s neck,” You said through gritted teeth as you watched your boyfriend warm up.

“Maybe you should go cool off in the bathroom before the game starts. I’ll let Kageyama-Kun know what’s going on and I’ll meet you in the hallway,” Kiyoko suggested as you gave her prayer hands cause she really do be a queen

You took your clipboard with you as if it was a weapon and stomped out to the bathroom cause you knew if you stayed in that gym any longer, you would cause a scene

You rinsed your face in the bathroom and you took a few deep breaths as you tried to calm yourself down

Your friends and family always told you that you needed to get your anger under control and now that you were dating, the last thing you needed was to scare Kageyama off

When you started to head out towards the gym, you felt in the air that something was off like spidey senses but instead, it’s like a creep radar was sounding off in your head

That’s when you saw Kiyoko and one of the guys from earlier cornering her against a wall

You can see that Kiyoko was visibly uncomfortable and you were just about to push your limit

“ I said to leave me alone. I’m waiting for a friend.”

“ Oh, you mean the other manager? I’m telling you, we would treat you like absolute queens at our school-”

“ Hey dude, back the hell off!” You shoved the guy to the side pretty hard to the point where he stumbled back a few good feet,” fucking creep.”

This dude, this mf has the audacity to POST UP TO YOU! You’re not even intimidated by him even though he’s easily half a foot taller than you

Like he’s in your face cause now he’s pissed that this girl actually managed to shove him pretty hard

“ Lay your hands on me again and see what happens.”

“ Are you threatening me? Cause if you are, go on and try to hit me I fucking dare you!”

Kiyoko is like nuh uh not on my watch and while im pretty sure kiyoko can throw fucking hands, she ran to go get Kageyama like “ go get ur girl”

This alerts pretty much the whole team even though they’re supposed to be warming up, they go with Kageyama cause if the boys hear your name and that you need help, they get hella protective

Kageyama slides over to the hallway and sees this dude yelling in your face and he sees red when the guy lays a hand on your shoulder

Before Kageyama can even make it over to you, you smash your clipboard over the guys head so hard, he hits the floor

BUT BRUH once he hits the floor you don’t! Stop! hitting ! him!

Like that clipboard is the perfect weapon oml

“ Don’t! Ever! Touch! Me!” You literally bash him after every word and this dude can’t even fight back like I personally dont feel bad but ummmmm you might commit murder

Kageyama rushes over to you and grabs you so you can stop and he’s trying to calm you down but once the word “bitch” slips out of the guys mouth, Kageyama grabs him by the jersey and is shaking him like a ragdoll

“ Watch your goddamn mouth before I put my fist through it!”

And you’re still heated so you want to basically jump this dude with your boyfriend cause romance ya know but Suga is holding you back ( he highkey struggling)

And now Noya and Tanaka are trying to hold Kageyama back because while they definitely would’ve reacted the same way, they don’t want Kageyama to go overboard

“ What did you just say? Go on and say it again-”

“ Kageyama please!”

“ You’re lucky I’m getting held back-”

“ Y/N! Enough!”

Just two lovebirds threatening a dudes life I love it

Things get resolved pretty quickly thanks to daddy daichi calming everyone down and now it’s time for the match to start

Suga lets go of you when Kageyama walks over and the first thing he does is hug you tightly. He practically squeezes the life out of you like this experience really showed how protective he was

He even admits that while he’s glad you can handle yourself, you shouldn't have to stand up to people alone and 100% doesn’t think you overreacted at all especially when Kiyoko thanks you for sticking up for her

He’s a bit intimidated by how you acted only because he had never saw you that mad before but he doesn’t blame you for how you handled it

#haikyuu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!! x reader #haikyuu headcanon #haikyuu!! heacanon #haikyuu hc #haikyuu!! hc #akaashi #akaashi x reader #akaashi headcanon #akaashi hc #akaashi scenario #akaashi imagine #fukurodani #fukurodani headcanon #fukurodani hc #fukurodani x reader #fukurodani imagine #fukurodani scenario #keiji akaashi #keiji akaashi x reader #keiji akaashi headcanon #keiji akaashi hc #kageyama #kageyama x reader #kageyama headcanon #kageyama hc #kageyama scenario #kageyama imagine

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Scotland Pt 26

Pt 1 - Pt 2 - Pt 3 - Pt 4 - Pt 5 - Pt 6 – Pt 7 - Pt 8 - Pt 9 - Pt 10 - Pt 11 - Pt 12 - Pt 13 - Pt 14 - Pt 15 - Pt 16 - Pt 17 - Pt 18 - Pt 19 - Pt 20 - Pt 21 - Pt 22 - Pt 23 - Pt 24 - Pt 25 -

...

Messy. The only word you could think of to describe your should have been break up with Lee. Because after all how could you break something that never really began. Just a dalliance at best, cuddling and making out where you guessed he might have been catching feelings and now that you had finished a trip out to a press event with him he had picked up his mood again. Now on less rocky ground that he realized there were babies coming into your life soon and his bouncy ball lifestyle and wish to explore the world for months at a time in a drop of his hat between jobs wasn’t possible after you’d picked him up off his hotel room floor out of his cold turkey sober slump. He had accepted that though you could be perfect you two together wasn’t.

And now that you were home again it was a different barrage. Questions on why your husband didn’t come for longer stays aside from weekends and a random weekly visit if possible in between racking up his miles now that you were meant to be on your honeymoon for your secret wedding. Hermit life again was your wish between checks on Colin and his tries to ready the perfect nursery for his impending baby bomb to be dropped on him. At least until a knock sounded on your door.

On the other side of the door you smirked at your husband who could have let himself in that stood with huge grin after his long drive. Before you could speak he stated excitedly, “Ok, I’ve got 2 tickets to Australia. Flight leaves in four hours, so let’s pack up your things.”

“Seriously? What about your job?” You giggled in his excited peck on your cheek in a warm hug.

His smile grew again in his step back into your view, “Got a month for holiday till filming starts again. So, you, me and that ridiculously small bikini of yours are going to Australia. You in?”

You giggle and let him in to help you pack, “What about that fear of water of yours?”

He smirks a you, “As long as I’ve got you there to hold my hand I’ll be fine. I’ve even packed that speedo you mentioned if you don’t want to be the only one in something skimpy.”

You giggle again, “I think I may just have you wear it around the hotel for me.”

He smirks, “We’re actually staying at a friend’s vacation home he lets me use when I go there. It has its own pool as well if you prefer it to the ocean.”

“Just us there or is he there as well?”

“Just us.” He walks closer to kiss you again, holding you close, “I don’t care what we do. I just want to be with you.”

You curl your arms around his neck, his smile grows and he leans in for another kiss. “I’m gonna make sure this vacation is incredible for the both of us.”

“I’m sure it will be.”

He smirked again, “Let’s see how many papers we can make our way onto.”

 ..

 “Please tell me that seal face is what I think it is.” Three babies, in the grey and black image taken at the in town midwife’s center Richard watched appear on the screen had him in tears. Turns out your mini honeymoon in Australia was more than just much needed time away together as after your cousin Drew had snuck you some at home tests a trip here had been to confirm what those sticks had said.

He had to head to work and under watch of the town and your herd you had to head back to work, now reacted to with greater care by the smaller animals you had been moved to the care of unless the larger cattle and farm animals merely required inoculations or simple check ups. Still daily calls and his request of daily pictures taken for progress compilations later for a baby book he had found and was readying were ensured.

All the same a press stop away from England would have him out of reach, conveniently when your body decided to be found on the ground of your barn unconscious from pain causing your cousin to race you to the hospital. Everyone was here, everyone from town crammed in the small exam room as you heard it was your appendix and an ambulance was on the way to take you to a larger hospital with better tools to monitor you and the babies you were carrying. Only trouble was somewhere between the hospitals trucks of press crews were outside the hospital and were how the Armitages had learned of the trouble and had driven out to be somehow in the room when you came back from another better scan.

Kicking himself Richard groaned and wished he could break his fist in a well deserved punch to the wall of this airport now flooded with screens replaying the same news reel. Mention of a fetal monitor had been made and at his urging with how serious the situation had grown he wanted you to have the pesky organ removed so that it couldn’t flare up again. There was always going to be a risk and with this would come a chance that the plans for a nursery to be built up upon his return wouldn’t be required after all.

All the same he would be there by the time you got out of the operating room. Just in time to help hold you through the worst night of your life so far. It seemed there was no withholding the news even with the guards the Queen ordered for the room to keep inessential people away for your stay. Three to two the news of the lost assumed single baby to have a surgery essential to save your life had the internet exploding with support and hate on the choice made by yourselves and the Doctor for obliging.

Talk of morals tugged on the first can of worms in your explosive family history and the not so accidental death of your father in result to an assumed loss of the women in his life had suicide titles across the news to bleed into just about every single skeleton possible as it seemed pretend ex lovers of his had an even more scandalous past you hailed from to just about set the screens on fire with how it all seemed to explode.

“This, this is exactly why we eloped. To avoid this gaslighting you are all profiting from. We are human beings who both were born from human beings with their own traumas and struggles from long lines of their own painful pasts.” That was Richard’s lone reply to a video of one of the worst and rage inducing bits of so called news he posted a link to on his Twitter page. That shut them up, or at least most of them. Turning the formerly scandalized world into mourning for the wedding they would never see out of a hunger for scandal and for the week you spent in the hospital under strict monitoring for you and your two remaining babies the world didn’t know about the press and social pages you had seemed to turn around wishing you all the prayers and best in the world possible to recover from this.

From the Royal family baskets and helpful items were sent to keep you comfortable and entertained in your required two weeks in bed to rest at urge of the Doctor. Promise was given to not reveal the remaining pregnancy until your blessing was given and between the two of you even without Colin or Richard’s family to decide it the choice was clear to not release the truth for as long as you could manage. Richard had to head back for three final days leaving your male cousins and Colin to stay and take care of you then was done and could stay himself and fawn all over his treasured wife and twins that got daily scans from the portable scanner the Midwives took turns bringing over to keep an eye on your health both physically and mentally.

In silent stretches of green daily when you were given the clear you took small walks and bouts of exercise to keep limber and in shape to help with the birth and as your body changed to not increase your pain. Only through your aunts you heard of something good coming of this, mental health at least for certain prestigious families were now being open about their mental flaws and those of their own families to not seem so perfect and to just breathe in the open to help add some motivation for others to seek help if needed.

Sure again your father’s sexuality was shoved back into the closet and buried deep down in the back corner beneath the floor boards but at least it wasn’t all your family anymore. No one outside of town who knew the truth mentioned the pregnancy and you were glad for it, gradually as the twins grew that sting dimmed in not having a third baby to check the size of and every speckle of blood spotted once checked out confirmed another layer of your body’s readying to have your two healthy babies in what was now looking to be a picturesque pregnancy now your appendix had gone surely to be bothered with the results of your blood tests, while normal would have still irritated it.

.

Today however you were overseeing your sheep being sheered and the glad naked young ladies and fellows bounded around you in glee for being to themselves lighter than air again without the heavy layers you were glad to have to stock your town’s yarn stocks.

A turn of your head however had you step out of the barn towards the car that skidded to a stop with the door opening to leave the idling car wide open for the groaning woman to stagger to her feet. “Bell! What are you doing?!”

“I’m in labor!”

“Why are you here?!”

“You’re a Doctor! Help me!”

“What the fuck…” you muttered and glanced at one of the guys who said, “I’ll call the Midwives.”

Nearer to her you moved as she lowered to squat beside the car’s fender. “Bell, get back in the car, you aren’t squatting that boy out in the drive!”

“But-,” she grunted and you rolled your eyes going closer to grab her arm to keep her steady, “Help me, you have to.”

“And why do I have to?”

“This is Colin’s baby! You are the one who would make sure it’s healthy more than anyone!”

Pulling your phone from your pocket you dialed Colin’s number saying, “You fucked my boyfriend and all these years you act like you did something terribly clever using my face to do it.”

“Ladybug? Something wrong?” Colin asked with a panicked tone hoping you didn’t need to be taken back to the hospital again in some unseen complication.

“Your son’s about to be born in my drive. Get over here, bring some towels and whatever bag Bell might have over there with her things.” You shifted to look at the back seat of her car with a shetland pony in the back, “She brought a fucking pony,” you looked to her, “How’d you get the fucking pony in the car, Bell?!”

“He just hopped in. I wasn’t about to leave Theodore at the pony show.”

You rolled your eyes hearing Colin’s squint of confusion, “Did she say pony show? Where in the hell did she find a fucking pony show? Theodore-, she named a pony after my cousin?!” He shook his head, “Seven minutes, right there.”

“Can one of you get the pony?” you asked one of the guys who neared the car and begrudgingly goaded the pony out of the car to stroll around with the naked sheep as the rest of the team got back to sheering as you helped her into the passenger’s seat after turning off the car to have her in a spot you could get a better look at how she was faring in the labor.

“You can do this, can’t you?”

“Well I’m going to have to,” You said seeing the head and went to fetch your bag to get a tarp at least and some gloves to deal with this predicament she got you into out of her labor set brain.

“You sure you can do this?” She panted again in her next contraction you guided her to push through after guiding her on the edge of the seat with her right leg propped up to help with the position of the head to the arrival of Colin’s truck he parked and hopped out of with an armful of towels he set on top of the car and helped to keep her in the right position.

“I have a vague idea where it’s meant to drop out of,” you said and looked up at her face in her try to fold forward to see how she was doing herself at the drop of more fluid through the push. “Stop doing that, you need to just push on your next contraction.”

“I’m bleeding!” she shouted.

“You’re in labor!” you shouted back. “Baby’s in a bubble of blood and fluids, it comes out, Bell. You bend like that and your pelvis moves back towards the seat and it could hurt the baby and make this longer than it needs to be.” Now with Colin’s help by the time the Midwife had arrived in a clean towel the larger than expected baby boy pouted and grumbled up at his father who was tearfully brushing the goop off of his face as you helped Bell to be cleaned up with the water bottles and clean cloths before she was to be taken with Colin and the boy to the center. There the lawyer was to meet them and the paperwork to be signed as you washed up, pleased the Midwives took the used tarp with them to spare you the trouble and dispose of properly so you could struggle through your impending tears to focus on your sheep.

At least until Colin would return for a celebratory supper with you after the lunch with his family, accepting the first helping of pumped milk you had collected for his son to get practice in for your own babies. “Thank you,” he said again in tears making you point a fork at him that gained his hands being raised. “I really can’t say it enough. And the milk, if this is too much-,”

You waved your hand, “It just leaks out, especially when I sneeze, might as well save it for someone.” You said widening his smile. Besides, by the time he’s weaned I’ll have two more mouths to feed, three if you count Theodore. Turns out Bell doesn’t have the papers to ship him to her land yet. Why she thought she could have a pony on a small patch like that without papers, no clue.”

“I’ll take Theodore. Cousin’s girls can keep charge of him while they’re in town. I have a feeling she will grow tired of the permit regulations.”

You gasped, “She’s usually so dependable.” You said in a soft giggle from you matching his chuckle in a teary look at the rocking cradle beside his seat.

“I’ll have the cradle back for you when he gets bigger.”

You shook your head, “For the first born boy,” he lifted a brow your way at the tradition he knew you wouldn’t be determined to follow and you sighed, “I can’t put it in the nursery. Keep crying.” You said wiping a tear that fell down your cheek instantly followed by his reach across the table to lay his hand on your arm there. “Dad made it, for, us. I want to use it, but I can’t stop crying and I’ll just wake up the babies if I go in to check on them and start sobbing.”

“We’ll loan you two of ours,” he said getting a nod from you, “Gramps said he can have them out next week, or month, at the latest if he actually does refinish the wood around the feet crests. Fair trade.” You nodded again and wiped away the next tear that fell inhaling sharply to try and stop crying. “If you do need me, you know where I am.”

“I know. I’ll follow the trail of leaves Theodore makes. I swear he’s torn off half of my poor mulberry bush.” You said making him chuckle.

“And I will replace your bush.” His hand drew back to lift his glass, “I know how much you adore mulberries when they first sprout.”

“Downright addictive,” you said in his sip lifting your fork and knife to cut a slice off your food.

 .

One baby boy healthy and beautiful beyond compare now daily being strapped to their father’s chest for his tasks were a common sight when you were in town. Growing to soon be crawling around they both adored their time with you but today another scandal would break. The twin girls of your own had been adorably dressed in footed onesies to fit the occasion.

And all across the internet the world seemed to explode at the picture Mads inside the Hannibal makeup trailer had captured of the Red Dragon tattoo coming to life. Richard naked save for an apron covering his front half with your daughter in a dragon onesie with soft wings and a tail nestled against his chest asleep to his hums and kisses on her forehead, a sight enough to have the makeup team smiling widely if not for your place on the round chair against the wall slumped back with a mess of curls around your face with your other daughter in a tiger onesie also with a soft tail and ears on the matching hat that was spread across your chest. The caption reading, “Due to budget restraints here is the Red Dragon, Mauve Hatchling and our exhausted veterinarian with her Tiger Cub. Happy Hunting Dragon, XO, Hannibal.”

No one knew about the babies and all through this filming thankfully moved to more obscure and remote locations in Scotland it wasn’t a long commute to have their moody Red Dragon able to make it to set daily with only a few stolen images of why he was so moody, and when he wasn’t, when one of two of his precious babies was in his arms or nearby being held by his excited wife, who had a walk on spot as the Vet in charge of the fake sedated tiger, wanted to not miss a moment of this filming she urged him to take part in.

While not his first choice to accept this role would always hold dear to his heart as his chance to both work, share that passion in a role you prized and helped him to come to respect and treasure as he got to have his family part of nearly every clear day of it and every evening after the muggy downpours. The Hobbit brought him home to you and The Red Dragon gave him wings to soar onto new projects and adventures he could share with his very own formidable brood.

...

(Gonna add the old tag list too, just in case some of you guys might still be interested in finishing this one off.)

Tags - 

@himoverflowers, @theincaprincess, @aspiringtranslator, @sweeticedtea, @ggbbhehe4455, @thegreyberet, @patanghill17, @jesgisborne, @curvestrology, @alishlieb, @jogregor, @armitageadoration, @fizzyxcustard, @here2have-fun, @lilith15000, @marvels-ghost, @catthefearless, @imjusthereforthereads, @abiwim, @deepestfirefun, @c-s-stars, @evyiione, @anastasialovepink​

.

All –

@sherala007, @mariannetora​, @jesgisborne, @knitastically, @catthefearless​, @theincaprincess, ggbbhehe4455, @lilith15000​, @alishlieb​, 

X all Rich. A - @deepestfirefun, @thestorybookmistress

X Lee P - @tigereyesf

Scotland - @evyiione, @anastasialovepink

#Richard Armitage x oc #Lee Pace x OC #The End #Family Drama #Health Issues #Social Scandal