#We did meet Tumblr people! Though I don’t know if they want to be mentioned!

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender - Ch. 6

As time passes, your relationship with Joel changes and sometimes, life has other plans. A continuation of Lavender Ch. 1-5 found here on Tumblr.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Length: 4.3k

Warnings: Mention of suicide and a suicide attempt, depiction of a panic attack, light smut, no use of Y/N. 18+ Minors DNI

August, 2000

In all honesty, you were surprised your baggage had held off as long as it did. 

You’d been dating Joel for a few months the first time your anxiety became an issue. It had been so much better when you were with him that you’d almost thought you were cured of it. Almost. 

It wasn’t anything new. You generally managed it well, planning ahead where you could, showing up everywhere a few minutes early, over-prepared for tests. With enough thinking and work, you could hide it. Take care of it yourself. It wasn’t something you talked about with anyone and it definitely wasn’t something you wanted Joel to know. 

But that was before back to school shopping day. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen the mall this packed,” you frowned as Joel looked for a parking space. “Even at Christmas it wasn’t this bad.” 

“That’s tax free shopping weekend for you,” he sighed. “Like this every year.” 

You dug your nails into your thigh. You didn’t do well in crowds. Joel frowned. 

“You OK?” He asked. 

“Fine,” you smiled tightly. He looked skeptical but jumped on a parking space as someone else pulled out. 

“Alright kiddo,” Joel looked in the rear view mirror. “We’re staying’ focused. School clothes only, OK? Gotta meet the dress code rules. We’re not here for posters or toys or books, school clothes are the mission.” 

“Can we go to Dairy Queen if I only look at school clothes,” Sarah’s face was very serious. 

“I will consider Dairy Queen if we only look at school clothes,” Joel said. 

“Yes!” Sarah punched the air in victory and you smiled. Maybe everything would be fine. You’d never dealt with crowds with them before. Everything was better with them. So maybe this would be fine. 

It wasn’t. 

You lasted through the first few stores, anxiety getting worse the tighter the crowds got. But Sarah really wanted your opinion on clothes, the glittery t-shirts and matching jeans and you really wanted to give her something more to go on than Joel’s “Looks great, baby girl.” 

“This or the pink one?” She asked, coming out of the fitting room in a purple shirt. You tried to focus on something besides the press of people hovering at the back of the store. It was hot, hard to breathe. You swallowed. 

“I think the sleeves on that one are better,” you said. “You get cold in the air conditioning at school so you might want more coverage than the pink one. Both are cute though!” 

She crinkled her nose. 

“I think this one,” she said. “This was the last one here, I just need to get changed.” 

Someone bumped into you from behind, sending you stumbling into a woman next to you. 

“Watch where you’re going!” She snapped at you. 

“Sorry,” you said quickly, chest getting tight. You grabbed Joel’s arm. “I’ll be outside.” 

He frowned down at you. 

“You OK?” 

“Fine,” you said quickly. “I’m fine, just need air…” 

You didn’t wait for him to respond, you just all but ran for the entrance to the store, working your way through the crowd as best you could. 

But out in the mall wasn’t much better. You tried to breathe, the air feeling thick in your chest, legs wobbly. You made it to a corner that wasn’t as crowded, near the bathrooms, and all but collapsed into it. Your chest got tighter and you tried to breathe through it. 

The first time you’d had a panic attack was about 10 years earlier and you thought you were dying. Your grandmother had held you, helped you breathe through it, kept you grounded. Dealing with them alone was a lot harder. 

You sank down the wall, pulled your knees into your chest and pressed your forehead against them, closing your eyes. You weren’t quite sure how long you sat there like that when you heard Sarah over the dull roar of people. 

“Dad!” She yelled. “Found her!” 

You wanted to look at her, say something reassuring but you couldn’t make yourself move. “Hey Baby,” Joel’s arm went around you. “Woah, OK… What’s goin’ on?” 

You tried to get enough breath to talk but you couldn’t seem to make it happen. 

“Sarah,” he said quickly. “Run to the ladies’ room and get a damp, cold paper towel, OK?” 

“I’m fine,” you managed, almost choking on it. 

“No you’re not,” he said, tugging you against his side. “But I’ve got you, Baby. It’ll be OK.” 

A cool cloth pressed into your neck and you latched onto the feeling of it. It was cold, that you knew. Joel’s arms around you were strong, you knew that, too. The stone floor below you was hard. You took a deep breath. You could smell the lavender of your body spray, the calming pine sawdust smell of Joel, the cinnamon from the pretzel stand not too far from you. Joel kept saying “I’ve got you, I’ve got you,” somehow drowning out the noise of people. 

“Sarah,” he said after a minute. “You’re on bag and key duty, you got that?” 

“Yup,” she sounded confident. Your heart sank. You didn’t want to drag her into your crap, she was just a kid…. 

“We’re gonna get you out of here Baby,” Joel’s voice was calm. You pulled your head from where it had been buried in your arms and knees. Everything seemed oddly bright. It took a second for your eyes to adjust. “Think you can walk?” 

You thought for a moment. Your legs felt shaky but you could feel your legs, which was a good start. 

“Yeah,” you managed. 

“Here we go,” he pulled you up with him, holding you tightly against his side. Your legs felt like Jell-o but you stayed on your feet. “See, you’re OK Baby, I’ve got you…” 

You were thankful that you could at least walk. It was a little less mortifying that Joel wasn’t stuck carrying you out of the mall. If someone didn’t look too closely, you might just look like a clingy girlfriend. That was better. 

Joel helped you into the truck before climbing in himself. He pulled out his cellphone and pressed some buttons. 

“Hey Tommy, need a favor,” he said. “Can you take Sarah tonight? Something came up… Thanks. Yeah, I’ll drop her off in a bit.” 

“You don’t…” you started, voice oddly scratchy but Joel cut you off. 

“Already done.” 

Joel drove straight to Tommy’s, getting out of the car with Sarah and spending a minute talking with them both at the front door. There was a knot in your stomach, replacing the tightness in your chest that had overwhelmed you at the mall. This was it, you were getting dumped. 

You’d never really had a boyfriend before but you were pretty damn sure they weren’t huge fans of women who couldn’t keep it together enough to go shopping. And Joel wasn’t about to dump you in front of his daughter. You tapped your foot, nervous energy needing somewhere to go. Joel got back in the car. 

“How we doin’?” He asked, eyebrows raised. 

“Fine,” you said. 

“No,” he shook his head. “I’m not doin’ that.” 

“Doing what?” You frowned. 

“Where you lie to me about how you’re feeling,” he said. “You said you were fine earlier, you weren’t fine. How are you actually doing.” 

“Fine enough.” 

He sighed but drove the car to his house. You were surprised for a moment and it must have shown on your face.  

“Figured we’d not have you taking the stairs for a bit,” he said. He got out of the truck and went around, opening your door and helping you down. You were more stable on your feet now but leaned into his side anyway. If he was about to dump you, you were going to take what you could get. He led you to the kitchen and sat you down at the table before going and getting a tall glass of water, setting it in front of you. 

“Drink that,” he said, voice a little stern. You watched him cautiously but obeyed, not realizing how thirsty you were until you were chugging it. You set the empty glass down and he got up and refilled it, putting it back in front of you again. You drank half of that glass, too, before putting it back on the table. You just looked at him from across the table. 

“If you’re going to break up with me, can you get it over with?” You asked eventually. He looked taken aback. “Really, it’s OK. I get it. But I don’t want to drag it out, just do it like a band-aid, OK?” 

“Why in the world would I be dumping you?” He looked completely confused. You frowned. 

“Because I couldn’t even handle going to the mall today?” You asked more than answered.

“What the fuck difference does that make?” He asked. You didn’t really have an answer. “Baby, I love you whether you can go to the damn mall or not, you think I give a shit about that?” 

You just blinked for a moment. 

“What?” He asked. 

“You said you love me,” you said quietly. 

“‘Course I love you,” he said it like it was obvious. “Did you think I didn’t?” 

“You’ve never said it,” you said. “I didn’t… You just hadn’t said it, so…” 

“Oh,” he said after a moment. “Well. I love you. Head over heels for you. Don’t think much is going to change that.” 

You smiled and took a sip of water. 

“You haven’t said it either,” he said. 

“I was kind of waiting for you,” you half smiled. “Didn’t want to be the silly kid gushing at you. But I do.” 

“Do what?” 

“Love you,” you blushed as you said it. “Probably to an unhealthy degree. Not sure, I’m not a doctor.” 

He laughed once. 

“Well, Baby, I ain’t goin’ anywhere,” he said. “So want to tell me what happened today?” 

You sighed, biting your lip for a moment. 

“Remember when I said I had things that made it so I’m not exactly a dream to deal with?” You asked. 

“Figured you meant your smart mouth,” he smiled a bit. “Guessin’ there’s a bit more to it.” 

“One of those things is anxiety,” you winced as you said it. “I can usually handle it just fine. It’s not that bad. But crowds… I don’t know what it is but they freak me out. They’re just so loud and chaotic and you can get caught up in them and not know where you’re going… That doesn’t happen very often. It’s only the second time since I came to Texas and the first time was before I knew you.” 

He nodded slowly. 

“How long has that been happening?” He asked. 

“About 10 years.” 

“Anything that helps?”

“What you did today helped a lot,” you smiled a little. “You gave me something to focus on, which helps. Made me feel safe.” 

He nodded again. 

“I can do that,” he said. “I want to do that. Take care of you. Make you feel safe.” 

You smiled. No one had ever wanted to do that for you before. 

“You said it was one of the things,” Joel said after a minute. “Want to tell me the others?” 

You winced. 

“You don’t have to,” he said, watching you closely. “But I’m still not goin’ anywhere. And I want to know how to help you if you need it.” 

You bit your lip and sighed. 

“I’ve never really told anyone this,” you began. “And you already know a little of it, but you might not remember.” 

“Try me,” he said. 

“Remember the night we first…” you trailed off, brows raised. 

“Not about to forget a damn thing about that night,” he replied. You laughed a little. 

“I told you about my friend Becca who died when we were 16?” You asked more than said. He nodded once. “She didn’t just die, she killed herself. And I… Well, I tried to go with her.” 

Joel sat up, almost jumping out of his chair before sitting back down. 

“We’d both been bullied at school,” you said. “She’d been dating a guy who started a rumor that he’d slept with her and me when they broke up. It got rough for a while and one day she went home and…” 

You took a drink of water. 

“It wasn’t the only thing,” you continued. “I had… issues for a bit already. And it just felt like everyone was leaving me. I didn’t feel like I had a reason to really try… Anyway. That’s what the scar on my side is. I overheard someone telling my grandmother how Becca did it and how it almost didn’t work, I wanted something that seemed more certain but I didn’t really know what I was doing. My grandmother found me. Pulled me out of school for a bit. I still finished on time with good grades because I had some really great teachers who worked with me.”

“You don’t…” Joel paused. “Seem like someone…” 

“I know,” you smiled a little. “And I’m a lot better now than I was then, but I still have some rough patches. I just never want anyone to feel as bad as I did, you know?” 

He got up and knelt in front of you, a hand going around the back of your neck and pulling your forehead down to his own. 

“It ever gets bad, you talk to me,” his eyes were locked onto yours. “Don’t do it alone, you understand me?” 

“I’ve never told anyone that,” you said softly. 

“Tell me,” he said. “Always tell me. OK?” 

“OK.” 

***

May 2001 

Joel was pretty sure your grandmother didn’t like him much. 

She was polite enough when you were around but otherwise - like sitting in the stands for your graduation ceremony - she’d basically ignored him, only talking to Sarah and the people around them. 

“Do I have time to go to the bathroom?” Sarah asked as they sat waiting for the ceremony to start. Joel checked his watch, one you’d taken Sarah to buy for his birthday in September. She’d been very proud, picking it out on her own, stashing it away without his knowledge. 

“You’ve got 7 minutes,” he said. “Can you find it on your own?” 

“Dad, I’m 11,” she rolled her eyes, getting up to go without actually answering his question. He watched her leave, trying to stretch out awkwardly in the stadium seat he was stuck in. 

“I remember that age,” your grandmother smiled. “It doesn’t get easier.” 

“So I’ve heard,” Joel smiled. “I know I’m in for it once she gets to her teens.” 

“Wasn’t that long ago that I had a teen at home,” she glanced his way before looking back to the stage. Joel sighed. So this conversation was happening here. 

“Been a few years,” Joel replied. She actually turned to face him. 

“She’s a sweet girl, Mr. Miller,” she said. 

“Joel,” he replied. “And I know she is.” 

“Too sweet to see what she’s doing with you,” she continued. 

“And what’s that?” He asked, clenching his jaw. 

“You’ve got my granddaughter playing house with you at 22 years old,” she leaned across Sarah’s open seat, fire in her eyes. “She’s too young and too infatuated with you to know she doesn’t want to be a mother to a girl who’s half her age.” 

“I’m not asking her to be Sarah’s mother,” he said, doing his best to keep his temper under control. “I’m not asking her for anything.” 

“You’re asking her to give up her future, whether you know that or not,” she snapped. “She is so smart, far smarter than me or her mother, and she’s going to throw it all away so she can be close to you, I can feel it.” 

“I don’t want her to give up anything,” Joel said. “I wouldn’t ask her to give up anything…” 

“That doesn’t matter,” she said. “She’s already talking about maybe staying here…” 

“She can teach here.” 

“Can she go to grad school here?” She asked. Joel opened his mouth to respond but she wound’t let him. “While she’s fitting herself into your life?” 

Joel didn’t have anything to say. 

“You seem like a decent enough man, Mr. Miller,” she said, looking back toward the stage. “I just don’t want you anywhere near my granddaughter. She deserves more than this.” 

Joel watched you walk the stage, screaming and cheering with Sarah. You found them in the crowd and waved. You were glowing and he was worried your grandmother was right. 

You slept over at his house the night you took your grandmother to the airport, Joel sinking into your warm, soft body, holding you as close and tight as he could until he emptied himself into you. 

“Is everything OK?” Your fingers traced his chest. “That felt… different.” 

“Are you sure this is the right thing for you?” He asked softly. You frowned. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Bein’ with me,” he said. “I know you were talking about finding a teaching job here but I don’t want you doing things different because you’re with me. I want you to live your life…” 

“You’re a part of my life,” you said. “You, Sarah… You’re some of the most important people in the world to me. I want to be where you are.” 

“I don’t want you giving things up for me,” he brushed your hair back. 

“Who said you’re the only draw here, Miller,” you teased him. “I don’t think I can just go back to the frozen north now, I’ve become accustomed to a different climate. Austin is just stuck with me. You can be along for the ride or not.” 

“Guess I’m in then,” he kissed you, smiling against your mouth. “Can’t leave Austin to fend for itself against you.” 

July 2001

You were pacing when Joel got home from work. Sarah was blasting some kind of pop music from her room and you seemed beside yourself. 

“Baby,” he said, heading right for you the second he was in the door. “What’s going on? What’s wrong?” 

“I heard from my grandmother today,” you were tapping your phone against the palm of your hand. 

“How’s she?” He asked after a moment. 

“Joel,” your voice cracked. His heart dropped. “She has cancer.” 

It was a late night. In just a day you’d gone from talking about moving into his house when your lease was up to making plans to move you across the country. Your grandmother needed to stay with her doctors in New York, Joel needed to stay with the business in Austin. You were stuck. 

You got a job teaching at a school not far from where you grew up and Joel helped you plan for the move. He insisted on driving you up himself, his truck loaded with what little you were taking back with you, him helping you sell your car before you left (“Baby, that thing is not making it to New York.”) 

“You’re sure you want to do this?” You were sitting outside with him on his last night in your hometown. The stars were bright here, the countryside quiet. “Long distance is shitty.” 

“I’m in if you are,” he replied. “I don’t want to hold you back…” 

“Will you stop worrying about holding me back?” You shook your head at him. “I know what I want. Please trust me on it.” 

“Then I’m in,” he looked at you. 

“Me too.” 

He made love to you on the grass in the dark, quiet and slow, committing as much of you to memory as he possibly could. 

*** 

June 2002 

“Joel!” 

You ran for him the second you saw him come through the security checkpoint, hurtling yourself at him. He caught you, clutching you close to him, your arms and legs wrapping around him. 

“I missed you,” you kissed his cheek, his neck, his shoulder, everything you could reach. “I missed you so much…” 

He’d come to New York, just him for a few days. You’d gotten a hotel room and tickets to Letterman. You hadn’t seen each other in months, long distance being harder than you’d ever thought it would be. 

You were happy you were there to take care of your grandmother. You liked teaching. It was challenging but satisfying. You’d made friends with one of your fellow science teachers - Louisa - who had a girl Sarah’s age which just made you miss Joel and Sarah even more. You talked daily but not being able to see him, touch him was taking its toll. 

He’d called you on the morning of 9/11, Joel being the one to tell you what was happening and to turn on the TV. That night, you sat in silence on the phone, watching the footage over and over, wishing he was next to you. You didn’t know what was going to happen next. The world felt uncertain and scarier than it had ever been and all you wanted was Joel beside you when it all came crashing down. But he was a country away and you hated it. 

He released you, setting you down but still holding you close, kissing you hard. 

“Please tell me the hotel is close,” he said, voice desperate. “I need you…” 

You barely made it in the door before he was ripping your clothes off and slipping into you with a satisfied moan. The tickets for Letterman were the next night. You barely made it. 

Sarah joined you a few days later, her thrilled to have made her first plane trip solo. The three of you took a hiking trip, getting eaten alive by mosquitos and eating burned marshmallows. You felt like a family. You loved every second of it. 

July 2003 

“I’m not ready to go back,” you sighed, sipping your coffee by the pool in Joel’s backyard. 

“I know,” he said softly. 

“Next year,” you looked at him. “If Nan’s still in remission…” 

“We can talk about it when the time comes,” he said, taking a sip of coffee. 

“I don’t want to be away from you anymore,” you said. “I don’t care what it takes, I need to be with you.” 

“I can’t let you blow up your life for me, Kid,” he looked over at you, clenching his jaw. “You’ve been teaching up there two years already…” 

“And I’m take correspondence classes to make my bio degree a pre-med degree,” you cut him off. “I’m already changing careers.” 

“Should you really be limiting med school choices to Austin?” He asked. 

“You saying you think I’m not smart enough to get into UT again?” You teased. 

“I’m sayin’ you’re smart enough that Harvard should be beaten’ down your door and you should let ‘em,” he replied. 

“Harvard’s overrated,” you shrugged. 

“Kid,” he sighed. 

“I know what I want, Joel,” you cut him off. “Unless you want something different…” 

“I’ll always want you, Baby,” he said. 

“Then let me worry about where I’m going to med school,” you said. “You worry about being up to snuff on your flash card quiz skills.” 

“My girl the doctor,” he smiled a little. 

“You really think I can do it?” You asked after a moment. 

“Know you can, Doc.” 

You got in the pool, Joel joining you. You wrapped your legs around him and he held you tight against him, nudging your swimsuit aside and freeing his cock, sliding inside your warmth slowly, gently. You moaned and kissed him as he softly worked your clit. Everything was slow and aching. You could feel every part of him inside of you, every detail as you rose and fell over him, holding him deep within you. 

“I love you,” he whispered, breathless, as he pressed so deep into you it almost hurt. You felt him cum, his pulsing triggering your orgasm. You felt every part of him he left inside you, your body holding onto him, almost like it somehow knew it would be the last time. 

August 2003 

“I just don’t think I can keep doing this, Baby.”  

“Joel,” your voice cracked as you stared up at your ceiling. “Please…” 

“It’s too hard,” he said. His voice was flat. “Maybe in a few years, if we’re in the same place again… hell, even the same time zone…” 

“I can visit more,” you were begging. It was pathetic. You didn’t care.  

“Not with your work and class schedule,” he said. 

“If this is because you think you’re holding me back…” 

“It’s not,” he said. “It’s just too stressful for me, too hard on Sarah. I’m spendin’ all my time on the phone with you to try and make up for not seein’ ya and it’s not fair to her.” 

You were quiet. Anything else you could argue with. You couldn’t argue with doing something for Sarah’s sake. 

“OK,” you said, trying to hold off on crying until you were off the phone. 

“I appreciate your understanding,” there was no emotion in his words at all. They were hollow. 

“I’ll always love you, Joel,” you said softly. “Til the day I die.” 

“I know, Kid.” 

You cried yourself to sleep for days. You’d never felt more empty. It took all your effort to go set up your classroom the next week and get all your supplies together. 

Life, you reminded yourself, had to keep moving. 

September was around the corner. 

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #fanfic #smut fic #joel miller x you #joel miller x f!reader #tlou hbo #tlou fanfiction

[the-zk-directory]

Zutara Probably Would Have Been Canon in Season 4 – The Masterpost

| [Intro.] |

If you’ve been around or within the Avatar fandom for any period of time you have probably, one way or another, become aware of one of the most intense shipping wars not just of any children’s show, but possibly just in general, one that is well over a decade old by now, approaching two.

Katara and Aang (Kataang), though canon, are often criticized for being one-sided, bad for each of the characters, and rushed. The creators of Avatar though – Mike & Bryan (collectively known as the entity ‘Bryke’) – have stated in the past that Kataang “was in the DNA of the [show] from the start.” (x)

Statements like the above are one of the reasons Zuko and Katara (Zutara) fans have been labelled ‘conspiracy theorists’ when they claim things that contradict Bryke: namely, that Zutara as a pairing was not only a serious consideration during the show’s run, but the likely outcome if the show had continued on for another season, which it seems it almost did.

(This hypothetical ‘Book 4’ was, for a long time, considered a Zutarian conspiracy theory in itself.)

But let’s back up.

How did these so-called conspiracy theories start?

-----------

| [Intro. To The Rumours + Who Is Aaron Ehasz?] |

For a long time, the only thing that Zutara fans could latch onto were rumours. People who claimed to have worked at Nickelodeon, worked in the artistic community and knew things, met a writer in person, etc. This may not sound promising on its face, but the thing is, most of these rumours were consistent. Most of their content concerned the one-time possibility of season 4, and one man in particular: Avatar’s head writer Aaron Ehasz.

We’ll go into those rumours in depth in a second. For right now, here's a little teaser: (x)

But first, who is Aaron Ehasz (& ex-wife Elizabeth Welch) and what were his contributions to the development of Avatar?

[Who Are the Ehaszs, and Why Does Everyone Bring Them Up?] -- (x)(x)

Bonus: (x) (Note that the poster is Giancarlo Volpe btw, another writer on Avatar.)

-----------

| [The Main Rumour Sources – Tumblr Blogs ‘Kataraandzuko’ & ‘Zephyrita’] |

Now we can get to the rumours themselves. The two main sources are both now-deactivated tumblr blogs. ‘Kataraandzuko’ is the first one we’re going to talk about. This person claimed to be an assistant writer/intern on Avatar Books 2/3 with inside knowledge of what went on behind the scenes in the writer’s room.

Meet ‘Kataraandzuko’: (x)

Zephyrita, similarly, claimed to be someone who interned and studied at Nickelodeon Studios in 2007 as an animation color stylist (according to (x)). It seems significant to mention that Zephyrita also claimed to not actually be a Zutara shipper.

(Besides reblogs, a good amount of her original posts can be found on the Wayback Machine. I took screenshots of a few of them and posted them to my blog individually with the links to the rest underneath.)

Meet ‘Zephyrita’: (x)

By the way, while I don’t know when the blogs were first started or when the first rumours concerning season 4 were posted, they seem to have been around since at least late 2015-2016. It’s hard to tell with the blogs and original posts being deactivated, but that’s the earliest I’ve seen. (If anyone sees anything earlier, let me know.) This will become important later.

-----------

| [Controversy: (A conversation I had with…)] |

Now, I said we were going to talk about Kataraandzuko first and the post that we’re going to talk about specifically is this one: (x)

In it, Kataraandzuko claims to have had a conversation with Aaron Ehasz in Philadelphia. Why they were both in Philadelphia is not stated in the post. According to what Kataraandzuko wrote, Aaron seems to strongly imply that he had wanted to explore a romantic relationship between Zuko and Katara. This supposed conversation was turned into a tumblr post and written down in a style reminiscent of an interviewer and interviewee.

Being the only well-known rumour post to be written this way meant it, kataraandzuko themselves, and all the rumours generally would come under a lot of fire when Everything changed when Aaron Ehasz attacked Aaron Ehasz himself came out and said this: (x) in September, 2018.

With Aaron himself basically shooting down the idea that a season 4 (and, by proxy, Zutara) was ever seriously considered or planned, people who had viewed Zutara fans’ theories as nothing more than wild, imaginative conspiracies by desperate shippers felt like they had been proved right: (x)

-----------

| [Other Rumours] |

And yet, rumours persisted.

[This (x) for the record, is kataraandzuko’s follow-up post to their ‘Conversation I had with Aaron Ehasz in Philadelphia’ post. I’ve reblogged a number of their other posts too. But fine, Aaron said the interview was fake, so let’s disregard everything ‘kataraandzuko’ said for now.]

Here’s someone who claims to have been present at a class that Aaron gave a lecture at at UC Berkeley: (x)(x)

(this class seems to have been real – here’s a link to people talking about it 12 years ago; the link on the page appears to have changed though: (x) )

Here’s another post concerning that class, though I’m not sure if the person they’re talking about who attended is actually the same person as above. (x)

Other posts from Reddit, 4chan, & Deviantart: (x)(x)(x)

-----------

| [Evidence Against Kataang] |

[Series Bible] Of course, rumours aren’t really ‘evidence.’ And, while it’s hard to find evidence for something that never happened, it’s not hard to take a look at Avatar’s original series bible, or series outline by Bryke, and see that, though indeed, the series bibles only outlines three seasons, it also doesn’t outline endgame Kataang or suggest it being anywhere near ‘the DNA of the show.’ In fact, Aang and Katara & Sokka separate at the end of this version, with the latter two returning home and Aang going off to search for airbenders. (x)

[“A 50/50 Chance”] Off the record, Bryke even seemed to admit themselves that there might have been a back and forth regarding who exactly was going to end up with who. See here (x) an account of a Kataang fan who thanked Bryke at a comic con, only to be told: “Well, it was a 50/50 chance.“

[M. Night Interview] This was confirmed by a third party as well. ~Certain~ movies he’s made may not have lived up to their expectations but I see no reason why M. Night Shyamalan would lie when he says that at the time he talked to Mike and Bryan regarding a potential live action movie, there were a lot of things that hadn’t been figured out yet, including “who Katara was going to end up with.” (x)

And so, with or without a direct confirmation of season 4 by Aaron (when the world needed him most, he vanished), it seemed there had still been wiggle-room at some point in time for the potential of ~certain things~ to have, indeed, been under consideration, fourth season or not.

-----------

| [Aaron Confirms on Twitter] |

BUT THEN.

100 Years passed and my brot—

On April 1, 2019, Aaron emerged, as if from an iceberg, to share some thoughts on an Azula redemption arc (x), confirm this was not an April Fool’s joke, and to state the following: “Yes, I always believed there would be a 4th season.” (x)

Zutara fans, realizing they had been right about this, and wondering what other strongly associated theory they might have been right about, rejoiced: (x)

One half of the infamous Bryke, Bryan Konietzko, did not. And, in fact, indirectly called Aaron a liar: (x)

And, It is worth mentioning, in the interest of giving everyone the full picture, that Bryan is not the only one to question Aaron recently. In late 2019, allegations came out of Aaron creating a sexist and toxic work environment. (x)

(Personally, I think your mileage may very on how serious or substantial you may find these claims.)

But with regards to the topic at hand, the Season 4 claims, someone on a Reddit thread here (x) recounts: “Also I wasn't really sure where to put this but Jean Paul Bondy, an artist who worked on ATLA, jumped in AE's twitter thread to say ‘I don’t remember this at all. Obviously I wasn’t party to discussion you three had. But I was always under the impression we were only doing the three.’”

Just recently, in 2023, Jack De Sena (Sokka’s VA) also answered a question about season 4 at a con: ((x) -- 27:30)

“I’ve heard subsequently that there was like, conversations about season 4 and stuff, but, at the time, it definitely felt like we were only doing three. Like, I was being told at the time like, they had conceived of this like, closed arc, three season… thing. So, while they were planting some seeds for like, here’s other story elements that we could explore in other areas when we have the time, it definitely felt like, ‘okay, this is, this is the journey we’re going on together, it has reached a logical conclusion.’ So, it did feel, to us while recording it, quite final and complete.”

“I was always told it was a set three,” confirms Zachary Tyler Eisen (Aang’s VA)

-----------

| [Discussion] |

So, in a sense, we’re back where we started. Though, I would question how much, exactly, artists and voice actors, who I would assume typically only start working on scripts that have already been decided on long beforehand, would really know about any behind the scenes discussions among the writers about potential trajectories and arcs for the show as a whole (and how long those would take to play out).

And Jack did mention that he’s heard now that there were “conversations about season 4” – I’m assuming he’s heard that from more trustworthy sources than internet rumours. And, if he did, then that directly contradicts Bryan seemingly saying he never had the slightest interest in making a fourth season and was always firm on that.

After looking at everything, it seems clear to me that, to the direct contradiction of a few rumours on my blog, Avatar was probably NOT pitched as a 4 (or more) season show. I do think it was probably pitched as three. But I also think, after the show was greenlit or as it was going on, Aaron saw the potential for more seasons and pushed for them. Maybe those discussions didn’t make it very far out of the writer’s room. Maybe there was a point in time where Aaron felt he had been successful in convincing Bryke to go for a fourth season. Or maybe he always felt like he’d be able to get them there eventually. Maybe the movie finally put an end to any of Aaron’s hopes. I don’t know.

But, it’s kind of irrelevant. If the ‘conspiracy’ is that Aaron was setting up the show for a Zutara ending in season 4, then it doesn’t matter how close, in reality, we were to a fourth season. What really matters is whether or not Aaron thought there’d be one.

“Yes, I always believed there would be a 4th season”

And it seems he did.

-----------

| [‘Zephyrita’, ’Tizuyan’ & the Smoking Gun] |

Now, you may have noticed that there was someone mentioned before that we never talked about: Zephyrita. I waited because I’ve noticed something that I’ve never seen anybody else talk about, and decided it needed its own section.

Zephyrita was, of course, one of the two main bloggers that claimed to have worked/interned on Avatar back in the day and posted things they supposedly remembered from behind the scenes, things that all supported the Season 4/Zutara theory.

Given that Aaron indirectly called out the other main blog as a fraud, causing us to have to disregard them for now, you may wonder why anyone should view Zephyrita’s credibility as any different. Here’s actually a post of someone arguing with her about this and Zephyrita’s response: (x)

“’You can’t prove you worked at Nick!!’

What type of proof do you need? Why do I have to prove something as insignificant as this anyway? Like, working there isn’t some exclusive club and I didn’t write an entire episode, I just interned and studied there but I did get to talk a lot with the staff. I wanted to intern at CN but I ended up with Nick in the end. This was all back in 2007 and I’ve been working in advertising since then. You want me to just ring up Tim Hendricks and ask him how he is after almost 10 years? […] I would post my studio pass as ‘proof’ but that contains confidential info.”

So let’s get into why I believe Zephyrita.

(x) – This is a post where Zephyrita is asked what some of Aaron’s ideas were that didn’t make it into the show. Most of her response has to deal with Zuko and Katara, but it also includes this little tidbit about Aang at the end:

“Aang would leave on a self-searching journey after feeling the consequences of energybending and getting jealous over how close Zuko and Katara had become.”

In another post (x), she shares “my friend yan no longer has tumblr because people on this site are RIDICULOUS but she told she wanted to put in some extra info about the ideas that ehasz had:”

‘Yan’ I’m thinking is another deactivated user – ‘Tizuyan’ – who also used to post about the unexplored ideas Aaron had. (Admittedly, I’m not sure how they claimed to know any of it.)

But Zephyrita shares the ideas that ‘Yan’ supposedly gave her, including this one: “zuko and katara develop an understanding and bond that the other characters can not comprehend. they grow very close and sokka starts to suspect there is something going on between them. aang starts feeling jealous but tries to hide these feelings (ehasz said he would start feeling “weird” lmao). this would play a part of his growing darkness.”

In yet another post (x), Tizuyan herself writes “They would have fit very well within the possible Book 4 where Aang became “dark” and traveled back to the Air Temples for solace (where he examines himself, and finds a bunch of flying bison + winged lemur)”

So, to summarize, there would have been consequences to energy bending that would have caused a growing darkness in Aang. And as said before, all these posts are from around 2015-2016, if you go back and look at their earliest, still-existing notes.

Why is this significant?

-----------

It is significant because in 2019, after confirming he always thought there’d be a fourth season on twitter, Aaron Ehasz did an interview (x) where he talked a little bit more about what his ideas were for Season 4, beyond an Azula redemption arc. Obviously, there’s nothing in this interview about Zutara. But. But. There is this:

“Ehasz reaffirmed his earlier stated plans for a longer arc for Azula but also divulged additional details. One plotline would have followed up on Aang taking away Fire Lord Ozai’s bending at the end of the third season.

‘My feeling about that was like there’s always a cost, right? There’s always some balance. You can’t just be like I’m the Avatar, taking your powers away. It’s a great power, but part of it is you just took all this evil into you. To take it away from someone else you’re holding onto it to protect the world.’

For Aang that would have been an incredible burden and something Ehasz would have wanted to see him deal with.

‘The story I wanted to tell with Aang was about him struggling with taking some of that inside and probably a considerable amount of anger and guilt and big feelings. By the way, guess who would be the best person to have a mini vacation with? It’s Zuko! Someone who’s processed a lot of anger on his own, right?’”

So… basically… there would have been consequences to energy bending that would have caused a growing darkness in Aang.

It matches up perfectly.

And not only that, but you’ll notice in the interview he also mentions wanting to focus on Iroh and his spiritual transformation, and mentions something relating to the potential for existing airbenders. This also matches up well with other things that were written in the latter two tumblr posts linked above.

So, what are the possible explanations? Liars/delusional shippers on tumblr who were falsely claiming to have insider knowledge on Avatar just so happening to have hit on some of the exact same season 4 plot points as the head writer, 3-4 years before season 4 was even a thing that had been acknowledged publicly? Aaron Ehasz trolling the internet and coming across these theories and then repeating them as if they had been his own ideas for… some purpose?

Or that maybe some of these blogs had been telling the truth?

This is why I called this section ‘the smoking gun’ – I believe that Aang can save t- that DenofGeek interview, along with those old rumour posts give credence to everything else Zephyrita/Tizuyan had to say. (And we’ll get back to ‘kataraandzuko’ later.)

Link to Zephyrita’s posts and comments: (x). The only other post of mine that I know Tizuyan appears on is this one: (x)

-----------

| [Zutara Evidence – External and Textual] |

And there’s more concrete evidence than just rumours. We’ve already gone over the ‘hard’ evidence against the idea that Kataang was planned from the start, but up until now we haven’t gone over the evidence that exists to support Zutara specifically.

First, here’s just a post (x) showing, besides what we’ve already gone over, how Zutara was teased in some of the promotional materials, as well as some comments (including the ‘Avatar Extras’) made by some other writers on the show, further confirming what Bryke once privately acknowledged to a fan – I’m not sure if the chance was exactly 50%, but it seems it was definitively higher than 0.

And, it seems, high enough that little bits of foreshadowing (or…potentially, a major amount of foreshadowing, depending on your view) did make it into the show itself.

Much has been made of the parallels that exist between the ‘Cave of Two Lovers’/’Crossroads of Destiny’ episodes, namely the two lovers with a red and blue color scheme from opposite sides of a war that come together in a cave of glowing crystals… and the two characters with a red and blue color scheme from opposite sides of a war… that come together in a cave of glowing crystals.

Here’s a few posts that break this down in depth: (x) (x) (x)

And here’s just another little piece of external evidence, another comment by a writer – and actually the writer of ‘The Cave of Two Lovers’: (x)

(I noticed he also mentions the series bible saying Zuko and Katara were supposed to end up together??? Yeah, I don’t know what that’s about. Make of it what you will.)

-----------

| [Bryke Being Nasty to Zutarians] |

^^Is it necessary for me to write this section? No.

But, in a way, it’s what led to my interest in this. I’ve said before that if Mike and Bryan had just been normal adults about all this, said that Zutara was a thing that was considered, that could have happened but didn’t, respected their friendship/bond in canon, and just said to all the Zutara fans, “sorry it didn’t go your way this time; hope you can still enjoy the ending anyway!” we wouldn’t have a problem. I would have just thought it was a shame and missed opportunity, and then moved on with my life and not really thought about it ever again.

It's the apparent lying and immaturity and seeming… mean-spirited-ness (?) that gets me. I don’t understand it.

In a rumour from Tizuyan ((x) - this is the second tizuyan post that I linked at the end of the second to last section) she writes: “Bryke despise Zutara.”

 This would certainly explain why Zuko and Katara hardly ever seem to have positive interactions in any of the material beyond Avatar’s original series, that is if they even interact at all.

(See Bryan’s out-of-nowhere response to the neutral question, “Can we expect a reunion for the returning characters from The Last Airbender [in Legend of Korra]?” which was:

“As far as a date night between Katara and Zuko, I think you are going to have to stick to the fan art for that." (x) (Not sure if there was any more to this answer or not; I can’t find the original interview, though I know I remember seeing it way back when.)

It would also explain the contents of this rumour (courtesy of Zephyrita) (x) regarding the writing, or re-writing, of ‘The Southern Raiders’ episode.

And it would explain Bryan’s infamous, “Come on kids! ‘Zutara’ never would have lasted! It was just dark and intriguing” comment. (x)

What it wouldn’t explain is the even more infamous video that Bryke debuted at 2008 San Diego Comic Con, and which Bryan (who really seems to be the main instigator in all of this, apparently) has since reposted to his own tumblr account: (x)

You know, the one where Bryke mock Zutara fans with their own fanart and say that “Women who think that Zuko and Katara should be together will forever have doomed relationships.” Yeah.

I have no further comments on it other than what’s already been written in the reblogs linked above.

(And all this is all the more frustrating when Bryan himself seems to have had a slight change of heart when it comes to the ‘DNA of the show’ and writes in late 2014 in a post on The Legend of Korra: “Personally, at that point I didn’t want Korra to have to end up with someone at the end of series. We obviously did it in Avatar, but even that felt a bit forced to me.” (x) (Like, HUH?! Since when?!)

-----------

| [Aaron Ehasz Again + Final Thoughts On The Kataraandzuko “Interview”] |

Meanwhile, Aaron himself painstakingly tends to avoid discussing Zutara, unless it’s brought up to him directly, in which case he usually just gives a wishy-washy answer about how he tries not to actively ship any characters. Though, we will go into an interview that’s slightly more interesting than this in a little bit.

First, I must bring to everyone’s attention a video that it seems no one else has noticed, as the post only had 4 notes on it at the time of writing this. (x)

Here is Aaron Ehasz at a comic con in 2006, which I believe would be sometime before season 2 had finished airing, showing the audience various ships from the show (most of them ridiculous) before at the end getting to Maiko (called Maizu), Kataang, and lastly (which I feel is significant)… Zutara.

This really appears to me to be Aaron showing the audience the ‘serious ships’ under the guise of this being just some funny game, and using the strength of the cheers from the crowd as a way to gauge interest for a potential endgame ship. Either for his own purposes… or for the purpose of possibly convincing someone else. I interpreted this video this way even before I just re-watched it while writing this post and realized that Aaron actually says this directly:

“We really want to hear what you have to say. I want you to know you have a lot of influence and power right now… ‘cause your, your cheers or boos will really… affect it.”

And I think it might make sense to combine this with the rumours here (x) about the supposed lecture at Berkeley where Aaron once flippantly remarked that Zutara couldn’t happen because it “would have made the six year olds cry” and the rumours by jhenne-bean herself, the one who claimed to have been at that lecture, who gives more context here (x):

“GURL IT WAS TOTALLY 50/50 even during the last season.

Actually, Nick execs pushed Kataang.

Because without it (according to one of the head writers that came and spoke to my class last semester) the “six year olds would cry.” Obviously that’s not the sole reasoning behind their decisions, but the intended demographic did sway the final outcome.”

(So, based on all this, I’m thinking that Aaron was probably a little disappointed in that video above when the Zutara cheers didn’t overpower the Kataang ones. [So am I, Aaron. So am I.])

-----------

Now, the only actual filmed interview with Aaron Ehasz about Avatar that I know of is this one: (x) in 2019, where he’s asked questions by fans. Yes, Zutara is brought up, though the surprising part is it’s seemingly at Aaron’s own prompting. For that reason and others I find this interview to be very interesting; I actually did a breakdown of it here (x), which I encourage everyone to consider.

If you’ve read through that breakdown, or just watched the video in question, you will have seen that the “fake” interview from before (x) was once again brought up. I put the word ‘fake’ in quotes because that’s how Aaron appeared to refer to it in the interview – with air quotes. And so now it’s time for my speculation on this “fake” interview:

I think it’s fairly clear that Aaron does not want (or, for some reason feels unable to (?)) speak freely regarding his opinions on how the relationships of Avatar did (or did not) play out. I think it’s safe to say he has avoided saying anything ‘on the books’ that would place him at odds with Bryke (though that post about M Night wanting to focus on season 4 and Bryke wanting to focus on the movie cut it pretty close) or put him on a definitive side of the shipping war, one way or another.

That’s why it makes sense to me that a rumour on the internet that wasn’t just any rumour, but was written in such a way so that it looked like an official *interview*, with Aaron’s name appearing before statements supposedly attributable to him and everything, would be something he’d want to make sure everyone knew was not actually official. If that conversation between kataraandzuko and Aaron actually happened, he would have believed it to be, at the time, a private conversation. He never would have intended for the person he was talking to to post their conversation and make it look like he said these things on the official record.

So, yeah, despite Aaron calling that post out specifically, I think it’s still plausible that that conversation could have actually happened and that kataraandzuko wasn’t lying. Her (?) original tags even say to take it with a grain of salt since it was written from memory.

And notice the line, “I wanted Aang to defeat Ozai and go through some emotional turmoil after taking the Fire Lord's bending.” Sound familiar?

Here’s another variation of one of kataraandzuko’s posts from before (x) where they talk more in depth about being an intern at Nick and what they saw behind the scenes of Avatar, even admitting, “Haha, it’s not hard getting an internship at Nickelodeon. They’re not strict and they accepted me on my first attempt. You just have to be a university student with a lot of motivation.”

(And witness at the end of the post another defensive-Bryke-Bryan example.)

Could all their posts be lies? Sure. But they always seemed credible enough to me. And given everything else we’ve gone over, can you really say anything they posted sounds all that crazy?

So, for your consideration, here’s my tag of all ‘kataraandzuko’s posts: (x)

-----------

| [Summary of All Rumours] |

Also, for your consideration, now that we’ve got all the context behind us, is this post which lists every major piece of gossip about what season 4 would have included had Bryke the universe allowed it to exist: (x)

And a post which I think perfectly encapsulates everything here and my final stance on it: (x)

----------

...And so. We should be all caught up now. 

I hope this post will be useful to anyone who’s confused about the little bits and pieces of things you might have come across or heard regarding season 4 or zutara or Aaron Ehasz or supposed conspiracies. (Or to anyone who just got tired of seeing everyone else, confused, talking about it this way, without the full context.)

If there’s anything major that you feel I missed here, feel free to let me know and I’ll consider adding it in. Otherwise, enjoy the show, enjoy your ship, and I hope you enjoyed reading. Goodbye, everybody! 😊

#Zutara #zukoxkatara #Zuko x Katara #Avatar #Avatar: The Last Airbender #the masterpost #I can't believe I missed posting this in time for Zutara month by two days #I say 'goodbye' at the end of this because now that I've posted it I'm kind of done with this blog #so don't bother following this account I probably won't post anything else beyond today #I've said all I really wanted to say on the topic; though we'll see what happens in a year or so when that adult Gaang movie comes out

[stickymolasses]

NEW SLANG

pairing: harry osborn (marvels spiderman 2 ps5) x reader (no use of y/n, not gendered)

summary: you are a young adult who had to put a pause on your schooling due to unforeseen circumstances. you work at a cotton candy stand on coney island and harry and you chat, perhaps leading to a new beginning for the both of you.

characters: harry osborn, peter parker, mary jane watson

warnings: mention of gambling, writer being stupid :3

an: hello! this is my first fic on this blog. if you like this first chapter let me know and i'll write another one! i have never really written fanfiction on tumblr or at least never uploaded on here but i figured i'd give it a try. i love harry in spidey ps5 so badddd and there just aren't enough fics for him :> be on the lookout for another an at the end of the fic! i don't really know how this stuff works yet but if you're interested in being put on my tags list for this work let me know!

Coney Island was so beautiful at this time of night. The night sky was illuminated with the sparkling shine that the entertainment district gave off. Despite the enchanting scenery, a sense of melancholy enveloped you on this particular night. The realization of your current situation hit home as a teenage girl, clad in an Empire State University sweater, approached your cotton candy stand—a stark reminder of why you were working here. 

You could’ve been in her shoes if not for the string of unfortunate events that unfolded in quick succession. Moving out of your aunt and uncle's place had been challenging due to the soaring living costs in New York City. To make matters worse, your ex-lover's reckless gambling had drained your finances, forcing you to put a pause on your education. The dream of becoming a great astronomer remained unfulfilled, and instead, you found yourself working at a shitty cotton candy stand.

Nights like these were bustling, contributing to your current state of dismay. The boardwalk teemed with people, immersed in the company of their significant others and friends—something you currently lacked.

The lingering summer heat made you sweat a little. Adjusting your uniform, you opened the topmost button, and as you looked up, three people stood before you—two redheads and a brunette. "Hi, welcome to Coney Cotton Candy. What can I get for you guys?"

You smile and greet your customers with as much delight as you can conjure. One of the redheads, a very handsome young man, opens his mouth to speak but quickly closes it and furrows his eyebrows instead. 

You greeted your customers with a forced delight. The handsome young man among them hesitated before making his order. His friend, addressed as Pete, clarified the order, and the other two in the group walked away, seemingly a couple. 

“Alright, can we get three of the little cones?” He fumbled through his wallet, and you noticed his striking green eyes. As you handed back his credit card, his gaze lingered in a way that made your stomach twist. 

“Have we met before? I feel like I know you,” he pondered.

“Um, I don’t think so. Maybe you’ve shopped here before?” you suggested, playing it cool.

“Did you go to Midtown High? Or maybe you went to Empire State?” he continued. 

“I went to ESU. I couldn't finish my degree, though–unforeseen circumstances,” you replied, throwing up finger quotes. He looked sympathetic, a reaction that both touched and frustrated you.  

“I’m sorry, I’ve had some of those lately too. I graduated from ESU in ‘21. What were you studying?” The line behind him grew, and despite wanting to chat further, you had a job to do. 

“Astronomy. I’m sorry, but there are customers behind you,” you said, cutting the conversation short. He apologized to the people in line, turning to leave but hesitating for a moment. 

“When you get off tonight, come meet me at the Speed Demon!” he called back. 

“Please!”

As you continued working, typing into the cash register, and dealing with an impatient mother, you awaited the hour when you would be free.  

You sigh, locking the register and slinging your tote bag over your shoulder. The remainder of your shift proved fairly uninteresting after your run-in with the man with pretty green eyes. Walking across the park, you take a deep breath, inhaling the scent of the Atlantic. The waves crash on the shore, creating a soothing backdrop to your uncertain life.

When you arrive at the Speed Demon, the designated meeting spot with the intriguing young man from earlier, you find him leaning casually against the head requirement chart.

"How did you know when I got off work?" you question him, suspicion coloring your tone.

"It said the booth closes at midnight on weekends. I only assumed you wouldn’t have to stay much later than that," he replies, eyeing your face and studying your expressions.

"So, why did you want to meet with me?" you inquire again.

“You said you were studying to be an astronomer, right?” he replies, matter-of-factly.

“Yes, but I told you I couldn’t get my degree. I—”

He cuts you off, “It doesn’t matter; are you good at it?”

“I mean, yes, I would hope so. It’s the only thing I’ve ever been passionate about. I wanted to heal the environment, starting with the stars.” He smirks and looks at his feet, shuffling them.

“Well, would you be interested in not working at Coney Cotton Candy? N-Not that this job isn’t worth your time or anything…” He stumbles over his words a little, getting to his point.

“What are you saying?” Your left eyebrow kicks up in curiosity at his remarks.

“I have a startup foundation in Manhattan. I’m trying to gather as many great scientists and innovators as I can. You seem like a great fit, and it could help you finish your studies.” He smiles wide, and you note that his teeth are perfect.

“Why should you hire some person you don’t know? Isn’t that a little bit sketchy?” You place your hands in your thin jacket pockets and fidget around a little bit, thinking. If he is serious about this, you could kiss him. You would rather work any job other than your current one, no matter a real job where you can actually do what you went to school for.

“You just have that look in your eyes; I can see what type of person you are. You want to help people too. We’d still have to do a real interview, of course; I need to make sure you’re qualified.” He laughs, and his eyes sparkle with enthusiasm; he means what he says.

“I guess it couldn’t hurt.” You roll your neck around a few times, tired from a day's work.

He holds his hand out for you to shake it, and you do.

“We are going to heal the world.”

“So, you haven’t even told me your name yet,” he remarks, walking by your side to the subway station.

“I can say the same thing about you, mystery man. If you weren’t so handsome, I would think you were just some creep trying to murder me,” you admit, probably a little bit too honestly.

He gasps and places a hand on his chest, in faux offense. “I would never, and my name is Harry. Harry Osborn.”

You tell him your name, and he repeats it to himself a few times under his breath. “That's a nice name; it suits you.”

He looks at you, as you are examining your feet. You feel his gaze on you but don’t want to scare him away, so you continue to feign interest in the floor.

“What happened to the people you were with earlier? They ditch you?” you ask, curious about the whereabouts of the group he was with earlier.

“I told them I had some work stuff to do, and they didn’t ask many questions. It was date night for them anyway. I was kind of third-wheeling.” He lets out a small laugh at the admission.

The two of you continue to engage in small talk throughout your walk. When you eventually reach your destination, he stops you.

“Hey, I just wanted to say thank you for giving me the time of day. Not just anyone would do that; you said it yourself, I could have been some kind of psycho freak murderer.” He pauses for a second, opening his mouth and closing it again, thinking about his next words. “I have to be honest, I really wanted to talk to you because I thought you were beautiful; it just helped that you were exactly what my startup is looking for.”

You feel heat rising to your face due to his gentle compliment. Since your last relationship, no one had ever called you beautiful; they only ever called you asking for a check. “Thanks, you’re not too bad yourself. I seriously hope I knock that interview out of the park; I’d rather not go back to slinging cotton candy.”

He chuckles and shakes your hand again, clasping over it with his other hand, lingering for a while. “I’ll see you then.”

part 2: here an: hello! what did you think? reader lowkey miserable until harry shows up LOL. i really wanna do fun stuff with this story idk. i am hoping it came across the way i imagined it! i just like need harry carnally and i realized no one was gonna write about him so i had to take matters into my own hands.

#harry osborn #harold theopolis osborn #spiderman ps4 #spiderman 2 ps5 #marvels spiderman #marvels spiderman 2 #peter parker #spiderman #mary jane watson #mj watson #harry osborn x reader #x reader #fanfiction #harry osborn fanfiction #harry osborn x y/n

[pedrostylez]

How The Crow Flies - pt. 7

Javier Peña x fem!reader x Frankie Morales crossover

Word count: 3.8k

Chapter Summary: You stay an extra day in the jungle because your feelings about Frankie are too confusing, Javi is concerned and calls you a lot

Chapter Warnings and Disclaimers: 18+ only. I am not responsible for what you read on the internet. You have been warned! Locations and descriptions of places may be inaccurate in comparison to each story (Narcos and Triple Frontier). Timelines are obviously different between the two stories, so we are going to meet in the middle and say we are in the early 2000s. These are not necessarily canon characters in regard to how they act, how they treat people, and their current relationships. DUBCON mentions and references, SMUT!!!! p in v sex (not wrapped up, but obvs be safe irl), some violence and threatening with knives but maybe it's hot, BLOOD OKAY NOT A LOT AND ONLY A LITTLE FREAKY ABOUT IT, SUE ME. dirty talk, anxiety, feelings that are confusing and not expressed well (reader compartmentalizes she must be a Capricorn)

A/N: Hey ya'll! I don't know NOTHING about Miami; never been, and I don't plan on going, so don't judge me for how I scrolled in reallllllll close on google maps, okay? I did an edit in my document, but within tumblr I didn't so if you see mistakes no you don't. In all seriousness, if I have missed any tags for trigger warnings, please let me know and I will fix it. Thank you for reading!!!

Taglist: @thevoiceinyourheadx @suzdin @survivingandenduring @bariskaplans @inept-the-magnificent @casa-boiardi @paleidiot @darkheartgatita @missladym1981

The trilling ring pierces his ears, irritation growing with each passing second. The click of your voicemail, followed by silence as Javier hopes and waits that you’ve picked up. Javier growls into the speaker when it’s clear that you haven’t, anger clear on his face. “Fucking call me back, or at least answer your damn phone.” He slams his receiver down, sighing heavily. 

You hadn’t called him back or picked up the phone in over a week. He knew it was his fault; how he treated you, how he wouldn’t listen to you. How he was unable to tell you exactly what he was wanting and feeling made him angry all over again. 

And to top it off, Jason was up his ass. “Hey, boss.” Jason called, too cheery to be in his office. “Any word from the jungle?”

“No.” Javier grunted, leaning back in his chair. He had given up on trying to keep what you were doing under wraps from Jason and David. “But she’ll be back tomorrow.”

Jason sits hesitantly in the chair across from him, sliding him a coffee cup. “Based on her most recent information, I think we have enough to go in there.” He says, taking a sip from his own mug. “She’s confirmed there’s drugs out there, and that there is money in and out. We don’t have to know where the money is to–”

“Let’s see what she comes back with this time.” Peña says, popping the top of the disposable coffee cup off to let it cool down. “It’ll be soon though, I don’t want…I don’t want this leaving the four of us.”

“I know.” Jason sighs, looking behind him. Bill Stechner walks by, just as Jason looks back to Peña with raised eyebrows. “I assume because we don’t want him to know?”

Peña rolls his eyes, shooing Jason away. Jason of course was correct, Stechner was in fact the reason you were secretly in the jungle and not surveying the Cali Cartel. But Javier wanted to stand by his promise to keep you safe, and so he would. 

Your cellphone beeps on the table, Peña’s name scrolling across the screen and flashing for what feels like the millionth time. You roll your eyes, legs shaking under the kitchen table of Yovanna’s crash house.

It’s your last night in this place, and while you won’t miss it, it makes you sad to see all of your stuff fit into one bag. You know you’ll have to do the same to the apartment that Peña had set up for you, but the jungle feels like a completely different world from what you go back to every other weekend. 

You feel a pang in your chest at the thought that Frankie may not show up, and that you’ve wasted your time just to spend one more night with him. Peña will be more furious than he already is and you’ve risked blowing your cover.

It’s easy to convince yourself that you are stringing Frankie along to gather more information’ it’s the easiest excuse for when Peña ultimately berates you. Something in the back of your mind nags you that it isn’t just for more information; that you are having feelings. 

You’re shaken out of your thoughts when your phone begins beeping again and a knock comes to the door. You shoot up out of your seat, silencing your phone and sliding it into your pocket before taking a deep breath and waiting. 

A knock comes again, and you race to the door, opening it to find Frankie leaning against the porch post opposite the door. He smirks, looking down at your body and back up again. “Changed your mind?” He drawls, arms crossed over his chest.

You shrug, turning to let him through the door. “Figured another day wouldn’t hurt.” He chuckles, boots heavy as he steps forward. 

When Frankie steps past, you smell something different–the cigarettes, the jungle seem to be no longer lingering on his skin. The smell of musk fills your senses, and your insides melt at the thought that he put on cologne for you. 

Frankie eyes your packed bags, looking back at you with his ears red. “Ready to bail though, I see.”

You nod, giving a half smile. “Yovanna said that the lease is up and that she’s not renewing so…sort of my last night close to the jungle.”

Frankie hums, looking around briefly before turning back to you. “You want to make it count?”

You can’t help the smile that creeps up your face, shutting the door behind you and leaning against it. “What did you have in mind?”

The look on Frankie’s face changes, determined as he steps toward you. His hands rest on your hips, gently pulling you away from the door and into his body. He’s warm, heat radiating from his skin and through his clothes to you. 

You sigh, hands naturally traveling up to his shoulders to support yourself. Their taunt, pulled tight in his shirt and you think that maybe he’s…nervous. 

Frankie turns with you in his arms, smirking when you gasp in surprise. “Thought I might bend you over the couch. Maybe…eat you out on the counter for breakfast.” His voice is low and trying to be intimidating, but you swear you hear it wobble with unease. 

“You want me all to yourself all night long, huh? What if I had other customers?” You tease, pushing him away enough to reach for the hem of your shirt, pulling it over your head. 

His eyes widen, pupils blown and mouth agape. “No need to lie; you’re not a whore.”

“Who says?” You question, reaching behind you to undo the clasp of your bra. He steps forward, stopping you in your tracks and runs his fingers up your spine. His fingers tangle with yours, popping the clasp open. 

“Me.” He sighs, letting the bra fall to the floor between you. He ghosts his hands to your front, pinching gently and watching you. “Tell me.”

“I’m not a whore.” Falls out of your mouth, unable to stop yourself from admitting the truth. His fingers glide down your abdomen, slowly undoing the button of your pants. 

He chuckles, shaking his head and smiling at you. Frankie’s eyes bore into you, keeping you frozen as his hand covers the front of your panties. He groans when the heat radiates from you to his palm, his fingers twitching. “No, but you’re my whore, aren’t you?”

You find yourself nodding, mouth open to breath deeper. “Yeah.”

“Say it.” He bites out, holding you secure and still in his grasp. 

Before you can speak he has you turning around, pushing you against the closest wall and grinding his center against yours. Still buttoned up pants restrain him, his cock hard and pushing against the fabric. 

It’s embarrassing, the way your underwear sticks uncomfortably to your center as he grinds. He’s quick as he pushes down his pants enough to let himself spring free, grasping himself to stroke just a couple times before leaning forward to let his mouth wander. 

Down your spine Frankie trails wet lips, hot air puffing out onto your raised skin. He’s quick as he strips your underwear from you, biting briefly into the meat of your ass to hear you gasp before sinking himself into you. You close your eyes, pleasure coursing through your veins at the feeling of him fully seated inside you. It’s a whisper, barely audible as you say. “I’m your whore.”

Frankie doesn’t stop, thrusting harder and laughing. His hand planted on your hip comes up to your face, gently pushing it away from your cheek to get a better look at you. “That’s right baby. My whore.”

Agent Peña calling

The flash on the tiny screen of your cell phone is bright in the dark room that Frankie lays in, waking him enough to glance over to your spot in the bed to see you’re not there. 

Agent  Peña calling

This time he picks up the vibrating device, furrowing his brow at the name and racking his brain to see if Santiago had said it before. He does not know this man, but you do. 

Agent Peña calling

The shower is running, and Frankie doesn’t know what time it is but he’s itching to pick up the damn phone. Why would an agent be calling you? How many clients–

Frankie’s blood runs hot as the phone finally stops and he’s able to open it up into the most recent calls.

Agent Peña incoming

Agent Peña incoming

Agent Peña incoming

Agent Peña incoming

Agent  Peña outgoing

Agent  Peña incoming

Agent Peña incoming

The one outgoing call from just a couple weeks ago stands out to him. The date makes him think of when he brought you to the motel for the first time. Frankie reads it once, twice, three times before he sets the phone back down in the same position he found it in, sitting up to reach for his jeans on the ground. 

He shakes as he pulls his switchblade out; cold in his hand, the click of the blade flipping out and stepping out of your bed. He moves silently into the dark corner behind the bathroom door, adrenaline pumping through him. The shower shuts off, your soft hum as you move around the bathroom filters through the door before it opens, you tiptoeing your way out; you probably think he is asleep. 

Frankie thinks that maybe this is a mistake, but his gut is telling him otherwise. Either he scares you and never sees you again, or he finds out the truth; right now. 

When you step out fully he surprises you, circling one arm around your middle and the other holding the knife to your neck. He hears your inhale, feels you stiffen in his grasp, but you don’t scream. 

“What the fuck do you do for a job?” He growls in your ear, pulling you tight to him to prove that you can’t escape. You won’t. 

“I fuck men for a living, Frankie. You know that.” You’re too calm, too monotone for his liking. 

“Fuck that.” He spits, spinning you around and bringing the knife into your vision. “We both know that you’re not a whore, and I’ve let you play your little games to get my dick sucked. So tell me, who is Agent Peña?”

He watches your eyes jump back and forth from his knife to his face, trying to remain neutral but looking for options; you’re too calm. 

“Tell me right now, or I’ll let you bleed out and have him find you here.” Frankie says darkly, pressing the blade into your naked collarbone. You wince, a drop of blood dripping down. 

“He doesn’t know where here is.” You’re caving, towel loose under your arms and ready to fall. Frankie watches you reach up to hold it secure, your fingers nervously adjusting. “I’m DEA.” You whisper, swallowing as the blood drips down your chest, between your breasts and into the towel. Frankie watches it drip, slow and methodical but you don’t seem to notice. 

Frankie waits, but when you don’t come forward with more information, he prompts you. “Who’s Agent Peña?”

“My boss.” He presses the knife further into your skin, stepping toward the bed so you are forced to sit in front of him. Perched on the bed, clutching the towel to your front, looking up at him defiantly with blood smeared on your chest. You wince at the bite of the blade, sighing heavily. “Fuck–we’re after Lorea, okay?”

“Prove to me that you’re telling me the truth.” He pushes, moving the knife lower. You glance down to where the tip of the blade rests just below your collarbone, swallowing roughly. You close your eyes, taking a deep breath into what he assumes is calming yourself. 

He can’t help but feel angry. Frankie rages inside at himself for not knowing better, not connecting the dots. Not telling Santiago so he could look into you further than what Yovanna had convinced him of. 

In a way he feels played, that itch to have you growing inside of him into one of disgust. Frankie knows that this can’t last now; it was different if you were doing a job and got caught up in his circle, but to focus your attention on what he wanted? To go after what he was after too? He lied to you too, but your lie feels more and more like a betrayal. 

“I don’t have my badge here.” Your voice snaps him out of his thoughts, looking down to see that he’s drawn more blood, prompting your response. He pulls away slightly, looking up to your face. You tell him your name, voice shaking and he realizes, terrified. “I worked in Miami for a few years, b-before I was reassigned to Colombia. I s-stopped most of the boats coming into the harbor.”

Frankie mulls over the information, brushing the knife away from your collarbone and down your arm. A chill runs over you, obvious to him in the dark. “Where did you live, in Miami?”

“Little Havana.” You gasp, looking up at him and trying to harden your features. Your hand tightens around the edge of the towel again, but Frankie doesn’t want that. 

He leans forward, tisking at you and pulling your hand away. The towel follows, leaving you bare in front of him. He can’t help the groan that bubbles out of his throat. “That’s far away from the DEA office in Weston.”

You lean your hands back, letting yourself be exposed to him and staring him down. “Closer to the docks to stop the boats. I didn’t mind the drive.”

He stops his movements, keeping his pocket knife out but looking back up to your eyes. Will’s voice rings in his ears from years ago, a discussion about a DEA agent that patrolled the docks. 

“This girl came down from up north, stopping those dogs in their tracks. They are maybe a few feet away from making their deliveries, I’m telling you!” Beer flows over the side of his cup at Will’s excitement, tapping Frankie on the shoulder. “She calls to them like a fucking siren, that’s what they’re calling her, gets them to admit who they are in 10 minutes flat, and then fucking arrests them. On the spot.”

“That’s badass.” Benny widens his eyes, looking to Frankie to see if he agrees. 

Frankie sips on his drink, shaking his head. “Long trips overseas with just your buddies would have me caving to a pretty girl too.”

“You’re the Siren, aren’t you?” He questions, tilting his head to watch your reaction. The widening of your eyes, the shuttered sigh as you nod, has his heart soften. He flips the knife back into its holster, holding it in his closed fist. “I live in Westwood Lakes.” When you don’t respond, just staring at him and waiting, he pulls away. He hears your sigh, shaking his head. “You could have said–”

“No, I couldn’t have.” You say quietly, blinking roughly as if holding back tears before moving from the bed. When you stand, pushing past him and towel forgotten, you shakily walk over to your disheveled bag in the corner. He waits, knife still in his hand and watching. “You’re fucking ex-military, you know I couldn’t have blown my cover like that.” 

The bite in your tone is new to Frankie, his frown appearing suddenly as he whips his head over to look at you. You’re bent over, ass on display to him and he can’t help how his cock stirs at the sight. “You could have said what you were so we could have helped each other out.” He sighs, tossing the knife on to the pile of his clothes. 

“We did help each other.” You scoff, shaking your head and angrily putting on your shirt. “And you got your dick sucked and I got the information I needed to go tell my boss. Win-win.”

He laughs, surprised by your dismissal. “Why are you angry?”

He can see your face harden and then collapse, tears overflowing and down your cheeks. He notices briefly how your shirt is staining with small amounts of blood. “Because you! You weren’t supposed to fucking know who I was! You went through my phone.”

He shrugs. “It was ringing.”

The initial anger he had felt had dissipated as soon as he learned who you were; it changed everything for him. But somehow, that anger transferred to you at the inability to keep everything under the radar. This see-saw effect between the two of you was addicting for Frankie; one losing control, one calm. Then switch, all within the same conversation. Frankie can’t help but think that this is exactly what you need, to let your anger out on someone, even if it's him.  

His thoughts are confirmed when you spit out, “So what? That fucker has been up my ass for week since I kicked him out–”

“You’re together?”

“No.” You’re firm, pulling pants up your legs and buttoning them more calmly. It’s like you caught yourself losing control. 

“He’s fucking you too?” He questions. Your calmness sets a fire under him, a small voice in the depths of his mind poking him to get angry again. Instead, he focuses on what he thinks is the right question. “Your boss is taking advantage of you?”

“No. I’m taking advantage of him.” You scoff, crossing your arms over your chest before wincing, looking down at the blood stains left from his knife.

Frankie shakes his head, standing up and approaching you. “No, he’s taking advantage of you.” 

You stare at him, dumbfounded and shaking your head. Frankie reaches for you–out of habit, and you bat his hand away before pointing at him accusatory. “What, like you aren’t? You’re a fucking hypocrite!”

He points right back at you, careful to not touch you but wanting to get his point across. “I told you exactly what I was doing. Has he?”

Quietly, you say, “He’s protecting me.” 

“How? By blowing up your phone so some guy can hold a knife to your neck?” Frankie feels disgusted, learning that Peña is your boss, and is putting you in harm's way. He should know better. “Did any of your bosses back in Miami do something like that before? Put you in a difficult position where you had to give up who you were, just to stay alive?”

You pause, steaming, head barely shaking back and forth as you stare at him. You crack your neck, closing your eyes for a few breaths before opening them for him to see tears streaming down your face again. His heart hurts at the sight. “You’re not…some guy.”

You’re leaning toward him, hand falling toward his chest and resting lightly on his bare skin. Frankie doesn’t know what to say, eyes searching your face for any type of answer. When he doesn’t find one, he shakes his head and covers your hand with his over his heart. “You’re…distracting for me. And you keep secrets.”

He lets his other hand come up to rest on your cheek. You lean in, and Frankie can’t help but let his heart crumble a little more.“I had to. I’m sorry if I ruined what you were trying to accomplish.” You whisper, trailing your hand down his chest, his hand following yours. 

“You didn’t ruin it.” He admits, moving his eyes to your wandering hand. He holds his breath, his cock twitching in his boxers and pressing against the fabric. You’re warm, stepping closer to him and snapping at the waistband of his underwear. Frankie briefly thinks about how this might look to Santiago and the rest of the guys if they find out that he’s been sleeping with you. He’ll be sent home instantly, even with the plan going through in just a day. “You can’t get in my way.”

“I won’t. We want different things.” You nod, letting your hand wrap around his now hardened member and give him a couple strokes. He closes his eyes trying to keep his breath steady. 

Frankie doesn’t know what this means, doesn’t know how to proceed beyond what he’s longing to do right now. He clasps his hand around your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. You look up to him, waiting to see if you can continue when he leans in and presses his lips to yours. 

He’s hesitant, waiting for you to tell him to stop. He pulls back, flicking his eyes between yours briefly before you surge forward, desperate to have your mouth back on his. 

Suddenly it’s frantic, his hands ripping at your clothes to take them back off, how you jump onto the bed and pull him to you by the back of his neck. He groans when you pull his hair, you sigh as he sinks into you again. 

The sound of his thighs hitting yours over and over again fills the room. You gasp as he trails his mouth down away from yours, sucking harshly into your neck before going further down. Frankie continues to thrust, his tongue sticking out and lapping at where his knife had cut you. 

“Fuck–Frankie–”

“I know baby. Just one more time for me, huh? I want to see you one more time.” He gasps, leaning back to watch you take him over and over again. 

Your walls tighten around him, nails digging into his arms as he pushes through. Your head thrown back, neck and new hickey exposed, skin shining in the light still coming from the bathroom. 

On the bedside table, your phone lights up again, vibrating loudly enough that both of your heads turn to watch it ring. Frankie pauses for only a moment, returning to thrusting and grabbing your face to turn back to him. “Mine. Do you get it? Mine.”

Your nod and the gasp of a “yes” is all Frankie needs to finish. 

Javier’s blood boils, dialing your number again from his Jeep. He's sitting outside the apartment he paid for, anger roiling through him without another care in the world. Where are you?

He gets out of the car, stepping up on to the stoop and pounding on the door to listen. Maybe you were avoiding him, leaving the lights off and pretending you weren’t there to scare him. He dials another time, the windows dark in front of him, listening for the ringing of your phone. When nothing can be heard, he swears. 

The beep of your voicemail dings in his ear, a sound he has gotten used to tonight. He sighs, looking around as if you might appear out of thin air. “Hermosa, please. Where are you?” He asks, shutting his phone and getting back into his driver’s seat. 

He sets his phone on the dash, tapping on the steering wheel anxiously. After thinking for only a moment, he reclines the seat back, planning to camp in front of your apartment until the morning.

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfic #frankie morales #frankie morales smut #triple frontier fic #triple frontier smut #javier pena fanfiction #javier pena fanfic #javier pena fic #javier peña #javier pena narcos #tw: dubcon #tw blood

[marie-swriting]

And It Lasted - Dylan O'Brien

Masterlist

Summary : During your first day as a 7th grader, you meet a boy who seems as lonely as you but little did you know, he's going to be the most important person for you.

Warnings : Fluff, feeling lonely, mention of pregnancy, maybe some grammatical mistakes as English is not my first langugage, tell me if I missed any warnings.

Word count : 1k

French version on Wattpad

French version on Tumblr

Contrary to popular belief, life is tough when you’re twelve, especially when you have no one to talk to. Your shyness has always stopped you from making friends. You always struggle to talk to new people and they don’t come to you either because they already have a group of friends. You have the feeling you’ll never fit in your school in Los Angeles. You really feel lonely, but you’ll get used to it, right ? At least, that’s what you keep telling yourself.

It’s the beginning of your seventh grade today and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t feeling sick in your stomach. Every new school year, you’re afraid the teacher is going to ask you to introduce yourself in front of everyone. You hate it. You always feel stupid when doing so.

As you expected, the students meet each other and talk about their holidays while you wait in a corner, alone. You look at some friends groups, thinking they’re lucky to have people to count on. You wish you had the same chance.

You keep looking around you when you see a boy on his own, too. His face seems unfamiliar and it looks like he knows no one as well. Maybe that’s your chance to talk to him ? You’ve come to realise not doing anything doesn’t help you. You think maybe you should talk to him at least once, even if you’re not close after that, at least you would have tried and that’d be a good thing, right ?

You take a deep breath and walk to the boy. He has brown hair and an upturned nose. The closer you get, the more you can see his moles on his face, you think it’s cute. When you’re in front of him, you smile at him timidly. 

“Hey, I’m Y/N.” You say, nervously.

“I’m Dylan.”

You were hoping he’d keep talking. You guess you’ll have to do it yourself.

“You’re new here ?”

“Yes, I moved in about two months ago.” He informs you. “Are you new, too ?”

“No, I’ve always lived here.”

Then, there’s a new awkward silence. It’s really complicated to have a conversation with someone you don’t know.

“Where did you live ?” You ask, desperately hoping he’ll keep talking to you.

“In New-Jersey. It’s very different from here.”

You think you used all of your social battery for the day. You don't know what other questions to ask. You’re already embarrassed. Maybe you shouldn’t have talked to him. You’ve never succeeded in making friends before, why would it be different now ?

“You know, if you want to meet your friends, I’ll understand.” Dylan tells you, nervously playing with his fingers. “They’re probably waiting for you.”

“Don’t worry, it’s not gonna happen.”

“Would you like it if we sat next to each other in class ?” He wonders and you smile.

“I’d love that.”

As you agreed, you sit next to Dylan while the teacher explains what you’re going to learn  this year. You’re happy to see it’s going well with Dylan now. Maybe you didn’t have a deep conversation, but it’ll get better. You don’t want to get your hopes too high though, but you’d love to be friends with him. He seems like a nice and sweet boy.

“To get to know each other more, I’d like you to stand up in turn and say something about yourselves, such as your name, your age, your hobby or something else, if you want to.” The teacher orders with a smile.

Seeing the look Dylan gives you, you quickly understand that he thinks exactly like you. He absolutely doesn’t want to do what the teacher asked. You both wait for your turn with dread. Before you know it, it’s almost your turn. You’re praying it’ll end soon. Dylan speaks before you.

“My name is Dylan, I’m twelve and I love baseball.”

“What’s your favorite team ?” Mr.Walker asks, interested.

“New York Mets.”

“Great team, but not as good as the Dodgers.” The teacher teases. “Your classmate turns now.”

“I’m Y/N, I’m also twelve and I love to draw.” You stutter. 

“What do you like to draw ?”

“Everything, I don’t really have a preference. I’m still trying to find my style.”

“Very good.” He smiles at you. “Come on, next one.”

In the end, it wasn’t as bad as you thought. Mr.Walker knows how to put you at ease and you think he’s the kind of person to always see the good in everyone. He doesn't seem like the kind of teacher who puts you down, you feel like he’s gonna bring the best out of you.

For the rest of the day, you get to know Dylan more and you become less shy, just like him. On second thought, you might have found a new friend. You hope it’ll last because he seems like a nice person. 

And it lasted. Dylan has been a part of your life for the past fourteen years now and you’re really grateful to life for putting him on your path. Since you met him, things have been easier. You’ve become less timid and you've got more and more friends, even if your friendship with Dylan is still the most important one. 

Speaking of which, you look at him coming your way with a big smile. He’s been shooting for the past months, but he’s been home for a few days, just on time. Once he’s close to you, he sits down next to you on the couch and delicately puts his hand on your round belly. Your little girl seems to have felt her dad’s presence because she starts kicking you.

“Hey baby. It’s daddy.” He says with a cute voice. “Your daddy came home for your birth. Daddy is happy to see you’ve waited for him to show your little face.”

“Daddy doesn’t have to talk about him in the third person.” You tease him.

“But daddy is gonna keep talking about him in the third person because he knows mommy finds it cute, even if she says otherwise.” Dylan contradicts you, smiling.

“I love you, idiot.” You tell him.

“I love you, too,  Y/N.”

Masterlist

{This is my side blog so I'll be answering comments under the username @marie-sworld}

#marie swriting in english #dylan o'brien x y/n #dylan o'brien x you #dylan o'brien x reader #dylan o'brien #dylan o'brien fic #dylan o'brien x fem!reader #dylan o'brien x fem reader #dylan o'brien x female reader

[ninjakk]

I don’t know your opinion on bottom lwj (maybe you like it or have no problem with it) I personally hate it with a burning passion, not even from fetishized point of view. But because it literally goes against how the character is in canon. Regardless, I usually just block that tag in ao3, but now i come back to tumblr after not logging in like almost a year and one of the first things i see is a freaking fan art of JC supposedly doing LWJ (is not shown explicitly) and WWX looking and being supportive and i just wanted to throw up. Literally felt like someone hit me with a pokemon psychic attack, i of course blocked the account and the bottom lwj tag here (something I didn’t even think i had to do) but i still can’t erase that image out of my brain so i had to rant to someone. Since you seem like someone really nice and you’re always amazing when answering asks here i am. If this ask makes you uncomfortable please feel completely free to delete it and forget it.

Hello Anon!

Aww, well thank you 😙 that's very sweet of you to say.

So firstly, before I tell you my opinion - I actually know the image you are referring to and I did the exact same thing when the post assaulted my eyes. I mean, everyone has their ships but come on! WX and JC?! No thanks.

As for your question, I have no majorly strong opinion on bottomji. I have read a few fanfics that have worked out alright. Mostly YLLZ era WWX meets extremely horny and willing 'self-sacrificing' virgin LWJ 'taking one for the team' - which were quite funny. But overall I do find it a little strange, because by making LWJ 'bottomji' people tend to make WX somewhat out of character one way or the other.

The reason I do not have a particularly strong opinion on LWJ being the bottom, is because it's kind of implied in the extras that they may well have done such things during their very active and passionate sex life already.

Seeing that he’d nearly hit his limit, Wei Wuxian laughed heartily and kissed his lips. “Er-gege, what haven’t we done? Why are you still so shy?”

7S translations - From Dawn Till Dusk extra

To me, the above certainly implies they've done a lot more than we have witnessed and switching would certainly come into that.

Also, I actually think LWJ would do anything for WWX, if he should ask. Including switching things up every now and then if his dear husband wished.

Overall, I don't think LWJ switching positions on occasion is necessarily out of character, if done properly and the fanfic authors stay true to how the characters actually are and would react during such acts. For example, LWJ still being the more dominant one out of the pair. Just because he's bottoming doesn't mean he's suddenly going to be submissive.

That being said, the image you and I saw is of course just completely out of character! JC is homophobic for a start! It just wouldn't happen. Ever. Even if JC was interested in some strange alternative universe. WX just wouldn't! I'm also convinced that WX would not want to, nor be willing to engage in sex with anyone else, even a threesome or some voyeuristic partner swap - or whatever the hell that image was?!

Wangxian are too wrapped up in each other, too completely obsessed with each other for anything else. Not to mention LWJ would drink so much vinegar he would pickle! And I don't think WWX would fare much better, LWJ is his and I don't think he'd be willing to share either!

I can understand why you might find it a bit odd seeing the roles switched around, but I do think it's something that could possibly be an occasional occurrence in canon because of the lines I mentioned above. Though I do love their dynamic in the novel and that is definitely what I prefer. Overall, we all have different preferences and opinions I guess ☺️

Finally, my dear anon...please go and read your favourite fanfic or browse through some gorgeous Wangxian art to cleanse yourself of the image which assaulted your senses. It's what I did and I feel much better now lol!

Hope you have a lovely day 🥰

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #mdzs novel #anon ask #answered ask #wangxian switching it up every now and then #there's only one person who could top LWJ... and that's his husband #same goes for WWX of course!

[skuppo]

hi hi!! i’m not sure if this is THE skuppo from AO3 but this is me shooting my shot anyways 😮‍💨

BUT my question to you: is hawks gonna start catching feels for suzu?!?!

i think i saw a previous comment that you made a few chapter ago saying that he might??? but idk!! i can’t remember 😭 that would absolutely drive dabi BALLSTIC (i can’t wait to see him implode with jealousy LOL) and i honestly love hawks so much that i hope this is the case 🥸 because to me, hawks and dabi are literally the same people but different fonts LMFAOOOO

orrrrr bakugo or todoroki start catching feelings for her?!?! she’s literally their age!! (and a lot of us are speculating that she might attend UA 👀)

ahhh okok i’m sorry for asking so many questions 😭 i know you don’t want to spoil anything but i love hearing your rants and miss you!!! ok byeeee 🩷

IT IS ME! Hi, hello! 👋👋💖💖 ON TO THE (SORT OF SPOILERY BUT PROLLY WAY MORE BLUE-BALLSY) ANSERRRRR:

(Man tho, imagine if it wasn't me, and there were just two people named Skuppo out and about losing their respective shits over the Dabbster and somehow we had not met or did not know about each other! Glad to see AU-Tumblrverse!me still has good taste… the good taste being just liking Dabi LOL 😌)

ALSO LOL 😭😭 THESE QUESTIONS ARE SO SPOILERIFIC AHHH 😭 I feel like I'm already really prone to spoiling a lot in my comments, though LORD KNOWS I TRY TO KEEP SOME AIR OF MYSTERY GOING ON, but I just get so dumb kinds of excited to talk about my silly headcanons for my story!

WHICH I AM HAVING THAT ISSUE NOWWWWW. I don't wanna spoil anything, BUUUUT, I will give a hint: having grown up playing a lot of dating sims/games with dating sim elements, I've always been partial to the LOVE ASTERISK, which is something my best friend and I jokingly came up with (tho I'm sure someone else invented it before us!) Imagine the typical love triangle, where two people like one person, or sometimes it's like a chain… or whatever…

Soooooo, by contrast a love asterisk is like, all the different parts of the asterisk come and meet in the middle because EVERYONE likes the person in the middle to some degree or another! I've always loved stories like that! 🤡

Not that I'm gonna get… TOO out of hand… I hope!! I guess that's really subjective! 😭💀 BUT, hopefully that helps answer your question at least a little vaguely!

A lot of people have made some very correct guesses on things, though! (Also Hawks is absolutely like the third most important character to the story, so he has a loooot of weight to him. And, I mentioned this in my comments, so it's fair to mention now: Bakugou does show back up! I did NOT mention this in my comments, but I will ALSO say this: Shouto does, too!

AAAAAND, aside from the love asterisk thing, I ALSO LOVE VERY JEALOUS POSSESSIVE LUNATICS. Which is how I'm writing Dabi, LOL. Bro gonna be losing his miiiiiind 😭 he deserves it (and worse) but I also love him, so I feel bad for him… but what is writing if not to make all our faves sufferrrrrrrr 😌

Thanks for hitting me up, though! Getting tumblr asks is kind of exciting LOL 🥹🥹👹💖

#skuppo answers! #tvoefoy #skuppo.txt

[susansontag]

Why did you decide to learn Spanish? Is it more of a hobby/the love of learning or because you want to talk to more people? Are you able to speak Spanish to people regularly in your day to day? Do you worry you might forget all you’ve learned if you don’t engage with Spanish enough?

Sorry for so many questions. I would love to learn a third language, but I wish I could use it as frequently as I use Spanish/English. Even though Spanish is my native language, English is just everywhere and I use it all the time. I want something like that but with another language and that is what has kept me from learning another language. What are the odds of me finding people in my day to day who speak whichever language I’m learning? Almost none because I live in a small place that isn’t very diverse. I also can’t just get on tumblr for example and find many people speaking something that isn’t English. And if I don’t keep it up I know I’d forget the language, but I’m certain I’d never forget English, you know? I want to be certain I’d never forget the other language as well!

y si quieres contestar este mensaje en español sería brutal!! :)))

decidí aprender español hace un año, más or menos, porque había querido aprenderlo por mucho tiempo. hube visto un vídeo sobre cómo aprendemos otros idiomas, y me hizo querer probar ese método en mi aprendizaje. el vídeo es esto. para mi, aprendiendo español es una inversión en mi futuro pero también es algo que amo mucho! cuando aprendí que puedo adquirir un idioma en una manera muy divertida, me quedó un poco sospechosa, porque la idea que se puede aprender a hablar y comprender una lengua sin aprender las reglas gramaticales o enfocarse en vocabulario es algo difícil de aceptar. mi nivel de español es definitivamente intermedio, pero ya puedo entender contenido nativo de los países hispanohablantes y voy a seguir mejorandolo. ahora voy a acabar de contestar en español porque quiero discutir más el método que mencioné antes

apologies for my errors btw, I'm still learning lol. basically I want to speak to people but also learning spanish just became a hobby. now I'm intermediate in terms of comprehension it feels silly to consider stopping. I'm dedicated to lifelong learning in many aspects of my life and learning languages is just another one of those areas. atm I don't have many people I can speak to in spanish in my day to day though I do have a few friends/women I know who speak the language so realistically we could speak together, so I'm not too worried. london is well connected obv and has plenty of language meet-ups also!

I get what you mean about maintenance but I've heard many say once they reach a B2ish level in a language they basically never forget it. in spanish I want to get competent enough that I can just think in it in my head even when I'm not in a spanish speaking country or speaking to someone in it. I practice most days so I don't worry at this stage. as for why to learn, you've got to ask yourself why you want to learn a particular language and for most ability to use it a lot is high priority (some learn a language just to read books or watch films though, for example). I'm very close to spain and also france (I also want to learn french) so I'm not concerned about my ability to use them in my life - I also live in an incredibly diverse city. I recognise how lucky this is and that it's not everyone's experience, but languages can really be doors to other places and opportunities I feel so it depends on why you want to learn it and what you hope to get from it

as for the method I mentioned I basically adhere to the comprehensible input method* put forward by stephen krashen. I'm actually going to talk about this more in another ask though because I received two more asking about how one should go about learning a language and well, that's what has been working for me. I'm not a purist about it though, I do just think it's a bit like magic

#CORRECTION: comprehensible input isn't a method it's a theory regarding second language acquisition #there are certain methods of learning that are compatible with this theory* #asks #anon #languages

[sapphirescripts]

Elvis & Austin!Elvis Ask Game

I was tagged by the beautiful @lindszeppelin to participate in this super fun ask game! Yay! It’s taken me a hot minute to get this post out because I haven't been super active on Tumblr as of late and for that, I’m dearly sorry. 

These questions were originally coined by @aconflagrationofmyown​ and here is the original post for anyone that wants to try it :)

When and what was your first exposure to Elvis Presley? 

I can’t say there’s a definite moment where I was exposed to him. I had always known of him, but only the gravely misconstrued version. I knew that he wore sparkly flared jumpsuits, that a bunch of people impersonate him to this day, and that he sang Can’t Help Falling in Love. Honestly, I didn't know him at all, not like I do now, at least 

And what was your first impression? 

I didn't have much of an impression. I gleamed off of the impersonators saying “thank you, thank you very much” and thought it was sort of silly. I didn't understand the outfits or sideburns at all lol. 

Lace shirts or jumpsuits? 

NOW LISTEN... that is a difficult question to answer because the lace shirt and the jumpsuit are two completely different eras of EP. I have to say the lace shirt because every picture that comes to my mind is of him when he was young, smiley, and unrefined. I associate it with super happy EP so I choose that, but don't mistake me, y'all. I love me some jumpsuit Elvis. 

You can steal one of Elvis/Austin’s outfits, whats it going to be? 

Dude.... I don't even know. Okay, off the top of my head I thought of the all black attire Austin!Elvis wore during the Trouble performance. I feel like I could definitely rock that outfit with the red tie and some dark, smoky makeup. If we are going all out though, I wouldn’t mind wearing the iconic double leather of the 68 comeback special. 

C’mon, we know you’ve been watching/reading old interviews and random footage of the man, so what’s your favorite random Elvis quote?

This whole moment right here. First time I heard it, I laughed so hard that there were tears coming from my eyes. It’s the silliest joke, but I love it with all my heart. Plus, I think that EP’s answer was a really smart way to deflect the question (whether or not that was his intention)

Did you find Austin Butler’s lips distracting despite them being in a movie about the King of plush upper lips? (Be honest now)  

Yes, absolutely his lips are distracting. I don’t consciously watch them but some scenes you can’t help but admire the beauty that is Austin Butler. He’s a handsome man, indeed. 

What’s an aspect of Elvis’ character you wish more people appreciated?

The serious side of Elvis. I think that he is misconstrued as being a flamboyant sex symbol (which in many cases he was) that his actual personality gets lost in translation. I’ve read that he was reserved and loved having deep, intellectual conversations with others. Not to mention I have seen people report the well hidden loneliness that permeated him often. I think it’s sometimes forgotten that he’s human like the rest of us... and that saddens me. Also, his extremely giving heart for charity. 

You meet Col. Tom Parker for the first time, forewarned with the knowledge of what a scumbag he is, what do you do?:  A. nothing, you’re a coward who doesn’t care about abused golden-hearted men B. you give the Colonel a stern telling off C. you encourage Elvis to leave him and break the contract E. you slap a legal document against that fat suit and declare “Mrs. Claus is bringing you a lawsuit” F. you waste no time with formalities, it’s a letter opener to the juggler for that piece of trash

These answers are hilarious! I would choose C. I’d try to use my 5 years of therapy to explain to EP that he’s being manipulated by a narcissist and that his golden, giving heart needs to be rid of parasitic relationships. 

What was your favorite aspect/scene from the Elvis 2022 movie?

Other than the whole movie? Lols. I love a lot of scenes. The beginning where they show young Elvis’s spiritual awakening through the tent revival is my favorite. That scene is referenced throughout the movie, like it grounds EP to go back to his roots. The concept of flyin’ away is this beautifully heartbreaking dream and I both connect to and sympathize with. Plus, I’m a Christian so seeing little Elvis experience the Holy Spirit always gives me chills. 

You can choose only one song or piece of media to convince someone to become an Elvis fan, what is it going to be?

This is really difficult to answer because I feel like EP is misrepresented so much. I’d probably start with his music, ask what the person likes and play something of his along those lines. Then, I'd show some concert clips of him being silly and human. 

How many children would you give Elvis Presley from your own -or theoretical- womb? (listen to the beast in ya, your feminism won’t serve you here)

I’m willing to give two or three. I have medical issues that limit me from popping out a ton of little humans so that’s my limit lols. 

Where are you hanging out with EP, his bedroom with the teddy bears, Club Handy, his private jet or Graceland?

I’m a wicked introvert so probably Graceland. I love tranquil time alone spent reading and cuddling. I'd love to just talk to him, or sit in silence while holding one another. (I'm so sappy omg). For fun though? Club Handy. I’d love to have a dirty dancing moment there. 

What is the peak Elvis era? warning, this says an awful lot about you…

All eras are peak Elvis era, let’s be real. But I have a mad crush on 60s Elvis. The early 60s all the way to the 68 comeback special and to 1970 is just... a lot to wrap my mind around. 

How long have you been an Austin Butler fan (be honest now, God is watching)

I wasn’t a fan, more of an admirer. I thought he was really cute in Sharpay’s Fabulous Adventure and probably had a crush before that from his Disney appearances.  

What kind of Elvis chick are you? -a 1950’s prospective wife material that he’s already sampled, a 1960’s filmset fling or a Vegas torrid backstage affair?

I don't want to be anybody’s fling or affair, even the famed Elvis Presley himself. At the same time, I don’t want to be someone he’s merely sampled. However, if we are totally flinging my standards out the window, filmset fling because I feel it’d last longer than a Vegas affair.

Is Austin Butler an honorary southerner now? Answer options: A. hell no, California can keep his sweet cheeks. B. hell yes, he’s practically been possessed by the soul of the King of the South  

Now listen, as a southerner I deeply approve of the respectful way that Austin portrayed the nuances of a southern accent. He’s welcome anytime to my part of the south!!  

Pick your poison in the fan-fiction realm: angst, fluff, smut, fluffy smut, angsty fluff, angsty smut?…or is reading about Elvis Presley an acknowledged health hazard?

I gravitate toward plain fluff and angsty fluff. 

Spit or swallow for this man? (And if you don’t understand this question move right along)

If he wifed me up, swallow. I will not elaborate. 

Would Gladys approve of you? Take your above answer into consideration

I sure hope she would! I know she and EP had a close bond so I think I'd be more concerned with not wanting her to feel like I’m taking her son away from her. I’d try to find a balance between respect, boundaries, and love/care. I’d definitely bake her some really good food and sweets.  

Which of Elvis’ cars is your favorite?

I’m not well versed with his car collection so I’m afraid the default answer would be the pink Cadillac. However, as I’m scoping out pictures, I really like the Continental Mark II and the Stutz Blackhawk III (that one is so sexy omg).

What are your odds for besting this man at karate?

None. I don’t know any martial arts. That man would chop me in half in zero seconds flat (and he’s welcome to).

If you could meet Elvis and have enough composure to tell him something, what would it be?

I’d tell him that what he did, has done, and will do will last for generations. It’s impactful, he is impactful. I’d also tell him he’s not alone in his loneliness and that I’m sorry for all the loss he’s been through.

What’s a hobby or pastime of yours you wish you could share with Elvis/Austin!Elvis

Reading!! I’d love to curl up next to him and read a book together. Or, to have EP read to me as I nurse a tea and close my eyes to listen to his voice (bye I’m going to make this a fic)

What’s the Elvis 2022 quote you’ve been mumbling to yourself ever since you heard it?

“There’s a lotta people sayin’ a lot of things, but in the end you gotta listen to yourself.”

What are your top 3 go-to Elvis songs?

STOP!! I cannot choose in good conscience because I haven’t heard an Elvis song I don’t love, granted I’m fairly new to being a fan of his. I’ll list the top three that I’ve been listening to lately:

It Feels So Right, Memories, and Baby What You Want Me To Do.

If you could spare him one tragedy what would it be?

I’m gonna join the bandwagon of everyone else here and say the death of Gladys. I think he would’ve been less burdened and emotionally damaged.

Is there a modern artist that sorta scratches for you the itch that Elvis’ absence leaves?

No one can fill his shoes. He’s so unique and unlike anyone else. However, I am a fan of many kpop groups and when I see my favs in concert, I felt the same thrill that I felt when watching Elvis 2022 and real life Elvis content.

How did you react at the end of the movie when In the Ghetto started to play A. I got up and fixed a snack because I have no soul, B. I left feeling alarmingly horny, C. I was impressed but didn’t realize how affected I was until days later when it was still with me D. I cried buckets they had to bring in a mop E. I may have appeared emotionless but in fact my soul was leaving my body and I don’t think it’s returned quite yet

I’m a mix of C nd E. I was so shocked and dazed from the movie that I couldn’t really process anything. I felt a heaviness in my heart from that ending for the following 3 days and couldn’t think of anything else, still can’t and it’s been like over a month. I’m in this for life #inachokeholdforelvis

If you’ve got a favorite gif or photo insert it here and bless us all

Literally he looks gorgeous 25/8 so I can’t really chose just one, but this Elvis has been living rent free in my mind ever since I saw it at the end of the movie. When I tell you my stomach sank to my toes!1!1!1!1

And with that, I tag these lovely people (ignore this I’d you’ve already been tagged or don’t wanna do it!) - @bcofl0ve @eliseinmemphis @powerofelvis @ash-omalley @dulcelibra @dawnmay @heartbrake-hotel @kawaiixriot @kaitaesupremacy @literally-just-elvis-fics @groovybabydoll

#about me #ask game #elvis 2022

[megamindsupremacy]

Hawkeye(s) fic recs

Killshot by arrowsandbows

When Clint abandons Kate, Kate finds a new sidekick.

On second thought, Yelena would probably have an issue with the word 'sidekick.'

-

Of arrows and soulmates by FluffyLlamacorn

The timer on Kate's arm only has a couple of hours left, which is just bad timing. There had been months left when they planned the date, then a couple of hours ago it jumped.

Kate isn't entirely sure, but meeting your soulmate while on a date with someone else is probably considered rude? When she meets him, her actual soulmate, aren't they supposed to start dating ASAP? That's what's supposed to happen to people with just the one timer: You've found the one, so you can trust fate and let yourself fall in love.

Kate isn't even sure she knows how that feels.

-

Backup by thebroadcast

She gets the text at two pm on a Tuesday.

KIDNAPPED NINJAS WARWICK HOTEL BRING BACKUP BATTERY DYING CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS SHIT

-

In which clint Barton is not the most well-adjusted avenger by cosmicocean

Clint gets the door open. The apartment is medium sized, with clothes and things strewn haphazardly all over the place.

“Honey, I’m home!” he yells.

“Don’t give me that shit!” A woman yells back. “You are in so much trouble.”

In which Clint takes them somewhere off the radar, where SHIELD won't find them.

(Short Ultron AU)

-

Cuddles by tonytones

Basically a bunch of small, happy fics about asexual soulmates Clint Barton and Kate Bishop. I want to mention that all my soulmark fics were inspired by tumblr and amusewithaview, who writes the best soulmark fics. There are going to be a lot of loving, platonic, cuddly superheroes in this.

-

My life in retirement by cuupid

Clint Barton has been a man of many different names

He has been Barney's Baby Brother. He has been the vigilante and superhero Hawkeye. He has been Agent Barton of SHIELD.

And now he's ready to be Clint Barton... thirty-seven year old retiree?

EDIT: ROUND TWO ADDITION

A Good Feeling by dentalfloss

“You work for SHIELD” Barton spat the agencies title at Coulson as though it were the nastiest cuss he knew. “We have nothing more to talk about.” Which was all good and fine, except-

“I have some things to discuss with you, actually,” Tony said and Clint’s bruised and swollen gaze turned towards him. “Many things. Nice things,” he tagged on when Clint’s gaze narrowed darkly. The kid might be passing out in slow motion before them but Tony was well aware he was still a threat and he made no move to approach. “Let me help,” he insisted anyway.

Or: the one where Clint may be a pretty formidable assassin for hire, but he was broke and his brother needed help he couldn’t afford so he needed a legitimate job for a little while. How fortunate Stark Tower was hiring.

-

Wiping off the Dust by dentalfloss

Teenaged Clint, it turns out, is a little shit.

Naturally this makes him Tony’s new favourite person.

-

what's my age again by verity

A for effort, H-A-W-K-E-Y-E, Kate says as soon as she frees herself from her harness. They really need to come up with a real sign instead of just fingerspelling all the time. Maybe miming drawing a bow, then pointing to the eyes. Something cool. You have to get over your boner for that boomerang arrow.

"Did you just sign 'angry penis'?" Sam says, distracted from his unresolved sexual tension with Natasha.

"Whatever," Kate says. She flips her hair. "I'm learning."

#mads posts #fic recs #fic rec list #marvel fic recs #marvel fic rec list

[kakairu-rocks]

We are excited to introduce our next shining star for the Creator Spotlight… @hkandiu​!

This is a member’s only activity where we reach out to one of the talented people in our community each month to find out all about them and their kakairu creations, and then show them off to the world!

We hope you enjoy learning about hkandi & her creations as much as we did. Please give her some love ❤️  

Pronouns: She/Her

Type of Creator: Writer

Where to find her:

AO3

Tumblr

Read the exciting interview below the cut, or on the forum!

If you would like a chance to be in the spotlight too, the only thing you have to do is be a member of the kakairu rocks forum, and be a creator; and we will contact you, ourselves!

1. How long have you been creating KakaIru fanworks?

I started writing them in 2018 but first posted in 2019.

2. What are you working on right now?

So much! A summer story I’ve been thinking about for a while, two stories for the KakaIru Reverse Big Bang, and some non-Naruto stories for other events (Marvel fandom!) as well as making notes for others for later in the year…

3. What is your favourite trope to create for?

I think I’m known for happy pieces lol! I like to think I write humor, slice of life, first meetings, early relationships, and happy endings.

4. Which of your creations is your favourite, and why?

They’re all my children and equally favorite haha!

5. Do you have any WIPs you’re excited about?

The summer story I mentioned, I thought about it for almost two years but I wanted to be able to post it for the summer and so it had to wait as it hadn’t even been started last year. And an October/Halloween story that I’m pretty excited for! Ah, and one that is fully fleshed out in my mind, a modern AU that I need to find time to write! I’ve also got notes for tropes for Kakashi and Iruka that I’ve written before but now am going to spin around for a few stories, so keep an eye out for that!

6. Do you have any original characters? If so, tell us about them!

I don’t think I do, if I need consistent background people the established characters interact with I may just give them names rather than general titles. The most I probably did for an OC was in my ANBU Hinata story (“Hinata’s Other Side”) because she was in a whole new world for herself and had several regular people working with her. Fortunately, most were always in ANBU gear so I didn’t have to create a lot for them beyond a name and some basic physical attributes haha!

7. What was your hardest piece to create, and why?

“Familiar Yet Different” was challenging because it was for an exchange and the recipient was interested in time travel, which I hadn’t written before. “Language Barrier? What language barrier?” was also challenging because in that exchange the recipient was interested in Naruto character pairings/groups I wasn’t really familiar with though had listed as options to write. It was my first time writing Sasuke/Naruto and took some time to figure out but I’m really pleased with how it came out! That’s one reason I like to do exchanges though, to open myself up to other characters/tropes/etc that I may not normally write otherwise. So thanks to everyone who organises any events, and anyone can always drop a line in my tumblr for ideas/requests you have!

8. Do you have any favourite scenes from something you’ve created?

Too many! I like a bunch of the scenes in “A Shinobi’s Christmas Carol”, where I re-told Charles Dickens’ story for Kakashi and his life. It was fun to find ways to integrate the world and characters but keep the general story alive. I also enjoy Halloween stories I write as I try to come up with what costumes any character would wear, and to try to find new ones I haven’t written for them before. And the entirety of “If you don’t take a chance, how will you know?” because I think it’s a fun and warm story, and the title is a phrase I remind myself of often when facing challenges or questions.

9. Where does your inspiration come from?

I’m not sure…interactions with people, things I see or hear. I generally just let my mind wander about a story and wait for things to come to me, rushing to make notes before I forget them!

10. Which of your creations is the most meaningful to you, and why?

“That Time At Voyeur Nightclub” will always hold a special place for me as it was the first one I fully finished before I started to post anything, though my actual first story I posted is also special, a Valentine’s Day one (“Konoha Valentine’s”) - it was so exciting to actually see my work online! I still get a thrill from it and can never believe it’s real every time I post something, and I’m always grateful and appreciative of the support I get from readers!

#Creator Spotlight #kakairu.rocks #creator interview #talented creator #kakairu fanfic #kakairu #kkir #kakashi x iruka #hatake kakashi #umino iruka

[mydaroga]

Hello! I had some thoughts on your post about fandom behavior. First of all, the scold-posting/vague-posting is totally something I've noticed as well and I do find it irritating. Unfortunately, I think there is always going to be a strong undercurrent of bitchiness in this fandom for few reasons:

Beatle fans have always been extremely tribal and decades of divisive media narratives have only caused this kind of behavior to become more entrenched. Add this dynamic to already tribal nature of online spaces and it's very easy for the vibe to turn toxic.

Everyone uses tumblr for different reasons so all of our different goals/agendas/preferences will never align. And since this is such a passionate fandom it's easy for us to get swept up in our feelings and forget that even though we all have a common thread that ties us together we are not all here for the same purpose.

There is a wide range of ages involved in the fandom so there is going to be a wide range of reactions to posts, people, behaviors, themes etc, based on where everyone is on this journey we call life.

All of this to say… yes, in a perfect world this could be a positive, encouraging community where together we could all celebrate our favorites, learn new things, and engage in thoughtful discussion. However, I just don't see that as a viable possibility due to the nature of the subject matter. I think the best we can do is try to curate our tumblr experience to meet our goals and preferences and just accept that there will be others out there that don’t like what we have to say. So if you want your blog to be a place where open discussion is welcome then lead by example and make it clear that is you're here for (which I think you’ve done a great job with btw). But don't waste your time trying to win the hearts and minds of people who are just here to be condescending or spread negativity or who simply have an agenda that diverges from what you're trying to do. If they're not adding anything useful to the conversation then just ignore them. Just let them pass by you and keep doing your thing. Eventually you will find your happy place. <3

ps. I say this with love and as someone who wants you to have the best fandom experience you can have, so I hope this doesn't come across as me trying to dismiss your concerns. I also struggle sometimes to not take things personally, or wonder where I fit in or who "my people" are, so all of this is just me sharing some thoughts on how I've navigated these issues.

pps. feel free not to repost, thoughts can just be for you

Thanks so much for your viewpoint. I am going to post this, because I do think it contributes to the conversation and you make a lot of important points. I don't fully agree with all of them, or with the foregone conclusion that all Beatles fandoms are going to be toxic (I know some that are NOTHING like this actually), but I do think curating your own experience and carving out a little world for yourself is super important. I *do* think I already mentioned that it's more difficult here because of the tiny size of the fandom, and one other thing:

Tumblr is notoriously bad for community, which was sort of initially the point, and the way it is structured makes it far less easy to just ignore the things that bother you, because once you post you have no control and what posts you see are only marginally controlled by you. I think that is far more of a factor than the age of participants or the subject matter. Lots of Beatles fans get along just fine, and I don't see any patterns here in terms of the ages I know about. But I do think that the way tumblr encourages a specific type of gotcha! engagement, discourages actual threaded discussion, and makes interaction a crapshoot is a huge part of this. (So I suppose the advice to me is: get off Tumblr! Which I did. For over ten years. If DW was still a thing I'd be there. But I also think that what I have found here is worth it.)

I also just wanted to point out that while your advice is appreciated, my post was actually in response to a question I got, in reference to my reply to another tumblr user's concerns about the fandom. My intent was not to log a complaint on my own behalf, but to clarify my observations when prompted. I appreciate people being willing to voice those concerns and while I doubt it will lead to any actual change, there's always a chance that recognizing something will lead people to be more mindful of it so I wanted to validate that conversation. At the same time, I also think your experience and navigation of this are useful for myself and possibly other people, so thank you for taking the time and care! I really appreciate you wanting me to have a good experience! I want as many people as possible to, as well!

#thanks nonnny! #hope it's ok I *did* repost #we're all out here trying to have a good time #but sometimes that can stand a little light shone in #the ask box #anon asks #kris talks a lot

[transitfanatic]

Some thoughts on The Locked Tomb

Never posted about this series before but it is amazing and so is everyone on Tumblr who posts about it. Everyone is so inspiring but also and in particular the two linked posts at the bottom, which sent me off on this braindump.

First, some questions

Why did BOE/Mercymorn/Augustine want to blow open the Locked Tomb? They repeatedly say how much they fear/hate Alecto. They never seem aware she has any special powers other than being an angry creep, or even that she might not be dead-dead. They’re surprised to learn that she and Jod did Lyctorhood together. Nothing they say makes it seem like they’d rather have Alecto in charge than Jod. They never even mention the “beast God could defeat once but not twice” prophecy-thing as a rationale for what they’re doing. So it doesn’t seem like their plan was “free the beast and let God be defeated”. What the heck WAS the plan, then?

Jod claims the RBs chase him and his saints because they hate the sin of Lyctorhood. But do we ever see an example of RBs chasing Lyctors who are far away from Jod? Maybe Jod is lying and the RBs are actually chasing only him (for revenge??). The Lyctors are always with him for the first multiple millennia, so they never get to see this lie contradicted. We the readers are left to wonder, though: if Alecto is in Lyctorhood with Jod, and RBs want to destroy Lyctors, any RB left alive has had plenty of time to make its way back and destroy the Tomb and the whole Nine Houses by now in an attempt to get at her. (OTOH, revenants don’t like to be near their corpses, I seem to recall? But at least one of the RBs was okay enough with being near its corpse to be the cause of Jod and all the Lyctors fleeing the planet of the First…)

There is a lot to suggest that Alecto is something to do with an RB. John says of the RBs “We called them by number” and of Alecto “When I first met her I just called her First, One”. BUT: when the group in HtN is meeting about how they’re going to fight Number Seven, one of them says “I recall Number One as a great an incoherent machine…when I saw it I thought it had a great tail, and a thousand broken pillars on its back, but Cassiopeia saw it as a mechanical monster with swords for wings, and great horns of myelin, tessellated over with graves.” So they saw Number One and presumably didn’t connect it with Alecto, whom they knew. Also also, if Alecto was Jod’s first resurrection, he must have known her before the apocalypse (unless he resurrected a stranger who didn’t know him?? Jod’s creepy enough for that to be possible), so is she an RB in a human’s body? And is she Number One or some other number of RB?

Re Alecto, or A.L., Jod connects her to Poe’s Annabel Lee. Is he referring to what she was like BEFORE the apocalypse, or AFTER? Like, is she Annabel Lee only after he switched her off and buried her in a tomb (“by the sounding sea”)? Or was she someone he loved who died before the apocalypse even happened, and she was his first resurrection after he gained the power to do that, even though she’d been dead for some while already? When reading these books, I’ve always kind of assumed that the people Jod resurrected after the apocalypse were people who died as a result of/during the apocalypse, but what if he was also busy resurrecting people who’d already been dead for ages?

What even IS the timeline of the resurrection?

So the world ends

Something destroys life on Earth/in the solar system

Revenants of the planets flee the site of their “murder”

[John survives this apocalypse and somehow gets necromantic power…? Like, can we assume he survives this?]

John resurrects Alecto

John and Alecto enter perfect Lyctorhood

[Maybe John gets his necromantic power at this point, from the Lyctorhood with Alecto, but if this is so, how did he resurrect her in the first place? Maybe he just gets extra power at this point?]

John resurrects Augustine (and presumably Alfred), and a buncha other people [I’m placing this after the Jod/Alecto Lyctorhood because I can’t see how he’d have managed to do it with Augustine and all his other disciples all hanging around all the time]

The time before Lyctors and the first Houses

Augustine and some of that buncha other people found the first Houses

Augustine, Alfred, Mercymorn, Cristabel, Gideon Prime, and Pyrrha live with Jod and Alecto at Canaan House (after the 5th, 8th, and 2nd houses are founded since we know Augustine founded the 5th, and Cristabel and Pyrrha had House arythronyms)

Maybe also Cassiopeia and Nigella at the same time - in HtN Teacher says that they started off in Canaan House as 10 people, half of whom were necromancers

At some point Cyrus, Valancy, Cytherea, Loveday, Anastasia, and Samael also show up (“second gen”), after the Seventh House at least has already developed a lot of its characteristic traits (hereditary cancer, beauty in dying etc)

Jod is able to keep all the necromancers and cavaliers immortal while they’re close to him so this bit goes on for a while, maybe a couple hundred years

They work on researching the limits of necromancy, how to remain immortal without clustering close to Jod all the time

Here's where it starts to get confusing

At some point, the group at Canaan House figures out the method for (imperfect) Lyctorhood, and Alfred and Cristabel Leroy Jenkins it, forcing Augustine and Mercymorn into imperfect Lyctorhood

I guess the others, except Anastasia and Samael, follow suit pretty rapidly?

Last out of the group (maybe?), Anastasia attempts the Eightfold Word in “laboratory conditions”, kind of implying that she’d watched everybody else do it and seen some mistakes she intended to correct. At any rate, Jod is her only witness during this and she gets it wrong, or maybe she doesn’t, who knows, who can trust Jod on this point

At some point before or during all this, everyone begs for Alecto to be got rid of because she’s a terrifying angry monster

After people start becoming Lyctors, an RB menaces the Nine Houses

Someone dies during this initial battle but it’s not clear who, or maybe John means Alecto when he says: “She lived to see what happened at Canaan House…she died after that first terrible assault”

Inferring here that they actually defeat this first RB since they have time to build a Tomb for Alecto and stick her in it and set Anastasia to guard it, before Jod and the Lyctors permanently flee the solar system

[The bit above is confusing because it’s not clear what order these things happen. In some order, Anastasia: fails at Lyctorhood; helps build the Tomb; founds the Ninth House. She could have built the Tomb after the first RB was defeated and John switched off Alecto > then tried to become Lyctor and failed > then returned to the Tomb to found the Ninth House there. Or she could have tried to become Lyctor first, failed, and that’s why John asked her to help build the Tomb later when he needed it, and after he left she stayed behind and founded the Ninth House.]

AT ANY RATE…

Lyctors dropping like flies

Dead Lyctors before GtN: Cassiopeia (torn apart by ghosts in the River while fighting an RB); Cyrus (drew an RB into a black hole with him); Ulysses (drew an RB into a stoma in the bottom of the River with him)

“Number Two fell soon after the Resurrection. Number Eight cost a man’s immortal soul, and - I still see that day in my dreams. Number Six died because one of my Hands - Cyrus - drew it into a ultramassive black hole, and Number Six had better be dead, because Cyrus won’t be coming back.”

So was Number Two the RB of “that first terrible assault”? unless John & Alecto defeated it together right after he resurrected her?? Which would suggest that it’s not Lyctorhood that that the RBs are after, it’s Jod. Unless Number Two is the RB that is Alecto, and that’s how it was defeated?

My initial assumption is that Number Eight must be the one Ulysses lured into the stoma, costing him his “immortal soul” - but this is is a weird way of putting it because it cost him not just his soul but also his BODY AND his cavalier’s soul. But Number Eight doesn’t have to be the one in the stoma because we know that in fact Jod and the Lyctors have defeated 5 RBs by the start of HtN, so maybe Number Eight cost someone ELSE their immortal soul, and that person is STILL ALIVE…?

By the time GtN starts, there are 4 Lyctors remaining out of an original seven (nearly eight if Anastasia hadn't "failed"), and 3 (or 4?) RBs left out of an original nine

By GtN, the Lyctors clearly do not hand around Jod all the time any more; Augustine and Mercymorn haven't seen each other for 20 years, or seen Cytherea for at least 10 years

So I guess the remaining RBs are all far away enough, and move slowly enough, for the Lyctors to have some level of independency from Jod without totally compromising their own safety

I still don't understand the baby-bomb plot

Anyway, a couple hundred years before GtN starts, Augustine and Mercy start plotting a betrayal of Jod, and the only other Lyctors left at this point are Gideon Prime, who is basically being gaslit by them and Wake, and Cytherea, who also ends up hating Jod but decides to go with her own scheme in the end. Why do Augustine and Mercy choose this point in time to plot against Jod, and what exactly is their problem with him (other than their dead cavaliers, and they've had 10,000 years to act on that grievance)? At the time of this plotting, they don’t suspect him of being in Lyctorhood with Alecto, in fact they don’t seem to suspect this at all until the end of HtN.

Why does it take them so long to put together a plot, and why is the plot (blow open the Tomb using Jod’s genetic material to get past the blood ward) so apparently contrary to their interests?

Why don’t they ever appear to follow this stuff up when the plot goes wrong? They were TRYING to make a BABY with Jod’s DNA and Gideon Prime presumably tells them that when he killed Wake he also killed what he thought was HIS OWN BABY. But Mercy and Augustine should KNOW that the baby probably wasn’t Gideon Prime’s, since they sent Wake out there deliberately to create a half-Jod BABY, and so if there’s a baby in the mix it’s probably that one. But neither Augustine nor Mercymorn ever investigates?? For 20 years! Mercymorn doesn’t even ASK Harrow about it despite knowing she’s about the right age to have BEEN that baby.

#tlt #the locked tomb #the locked tomb series #gideon the ninth #harrow the ninth #alecto the ninth #john gaius #can't wait for #nona the ninth

[swagcoolcat]

Hey, friends! I made a post saying I was considering making a bmc fan-kid post, because I have three different sets with my close friend, Moth! (They’re not on tumblr, unfortunately, or I’d tag them). For the sake of simplicity, I made them all on the same picrew to see them in the same style. (Picrew will be linked at the end of the post).

(This spans across five and a half years, so half of these kids are boyf riends kids and half are pins and patches kids)

Fan Kids below the cut!

EDIT TO ADD FOR PEOPLE THAT GO PAST THE CUT: Let me know if I’ve made any mistakes in any of the Alt Text! I’m trying to improve at it so I can start adding Alt Text to my art! Thank you!

**PICREWS WILL DEPICT THE KIDS AS PRETEENS/TEENS, MEANING YOUNGER KIDS WILL BE OLDER IN THE PICREWS THAN THEY ARE IN CANON**

The Mell-Heere Kids (TW for brief mentions of physical abuse in Ruby’s section):

Marcus Daniel Mell-Heere: Marcus doesn’t have much information about him regarding his upbringing before he came to be adopted by Michael and Jeremy. What feels correct to me though, is that Marcus’s parents passed away around the time he turned 5, close to a year before he meets Michael and Jeremy, which also explains why he starts kindergarten at 6 instead of 5- because due to the trauma and grief of losing his parents, he’s not ready to start school when it starts a month later. He’s incredibly outgoing and social, and he absolutely loves sugar.

Ruby Maye Mell-Heere: Ruby came from an abusive household before she was adopted by Michael and Jeremy. When we first meet Ruby, she’s shy and reserved. She hardly wants to speak with anyone, and takes some time to trust Michael or Jeremy, or anyone really. She comes out of her shell more the more time she spends with them, and grows an especially close bond with Marcus. She’s fiercely protective of him, and he’s the same way with her. She gains an especially close bond with Jeremy, as he had a similar upbringing to her after his mom left, and finally talking about it and having someone that understands the pain she went through really helps her in healing.

Robin Miracle Mell-Heere: Robin is the youngest member of the Mell-Heere family and their only biological child, born about 8 years after the events of the musical on Halloween. He’s a very happy baby who loves to explore. Robin has some weirdness going on due to the SQUIP. We didn’t end up exploring this too much, but what we did have was that his freckles would glow when his emotions got intense, and this would give Jeremy and people who connected with Jeremy’s SQUIP migraines. Robin also is growing a lot faster than most babies, which we explained as being due to the SQUIP as well (but really it’s because we were 14 and didn’t know how babies worked).

Jeremy’s Cousin (TW for mentions of Death)

Nate/Rain (last name unknown- but likely Heere): For simplicity, I’ll just refer to him as Nate. We changed his name to Rain partway through because we got attached to him more so than we thought and he was named after a real person. At the beginning of his story, Nate has been recently adopted by his older cousin, Jeremy, after his parents passed away in a plane crash. Due to the sudden trauma of losing both of his parents, a once happy Nate was suddenly thrown into a depression. He starts learning how to heal and starts making some friends after Jeremy meets and hires Michael, who specializes in helping kids. We ended his story going on a date with a boy in his class, Aidan/Hudson (same name situation as Nate).

Dillinger-Mell Kids:

Tao Dillinger-Mell: Tao is the oldest of Michael and Jake’s adopted kids at 15 years old. We made him and his sisters less than a week ago, so we don’t have Lore for them yet, we just have their designs, names, and ages. I do however know that Tao plays soccer.

Viviana Dillinger-Mell: Viviana is the second oldest of Michael and Jake’s adopted kids at 10 years old. We don’t really have anything established about her yet.

Sybil Dillinger-Mell: Sybil is the second youngest of Michael and Jake’s adopted kids, at 5 years old. The only one younger is Gaïana, her twin sister. Her left arm ends at the elbow, and that’s where her prosthetic attaches. Aside from that we don’t have any established lore yet.

Gaïana Dillinger-Mell: Gaïana is the youngest of Michael and Jake’s adopted kids at 5 years old. She’s the younger twin sister of Sybil, and she really likes cats. Aside from that, we don’t have any established lore for her yet.

Body type A Picrew

Body type B Picrew

If you have any questions about any of these guys please do ask, I’d love to hear them!

#long post #boyf riends #pins and patches #mellinger #meremy #bmc #bmc fan kids #bmc ocs

[afr0-thunder]

[Poor Chronicles Pt. 19]

*BEHIND STARBUCKS EDITION*

Chicken Salad and Water Diet: Day Two! I didn’t drink water yesterday, just went to sleep. I picked up a double, so it was tiring. I wonder every day, “Will I have the energy to walk to/from work on this diet?”. Legs a little tired, but I say, “Yes!”. “Will I get hungry and buy something to eat and start a new diet?” and to that I say, “Well I’m not hungry now, so I don’t think I will.”.

My housemate’s hostility may be stemming from her inability to track my income. Over eating too many packs of fucking noodles? Sounds mildly crackhead-ish, but whatever. I just figured if she never asked, I never asked her about hers and we both did our part every month, there should be no issues. Incorrect. She must assume my income means I’d buy her food randomly like she’s done for me (when I didn’t work for the first couple months). Also incorrect. You’d figure after almost a year of offering more than what’s required, she’d catch on…and I bought snacks. Need to put an end to that too. Possibly her grandson (year older than me) mentioned my Instagram story about how when I got rich I was helping no one. Didn’t say her, but things change. Also, he provoked this mindset to be furthered. Before I worked this job, I was at another job (he runs a business, meets lots of famous people, has them buy things from him, takes pictures of them with it), he asked if I was “still working at that lil pizza place?”. Long story short, I know where I’m headed and gave him business advice that would help him save and even make more money going further (mostly ideas). He went back and forth with me. Said I sounded like my grandfather. Ended up almost rolling his eyes because of how persistent I was with proving my point and said, “You right! You just know everything”…because I don’t own my own business, I guess. I’m just saying a consumer would understand sales better than someone “above” them because we tend to notice things that a producer wouldn’t, as we don’t have to tend to hundreds of others. He just ended with “Okay well let’s see where I’m at in 2 years and where you’re at.” like a competition. I said, “Well seeing as though I haven’t gotten started on my career directly and you are about 10 years in on efforts almost, but more than 5 literally, that would almost be unfair.”.

He says, “3!”.

I say, “I would do 2, but okay we’ll see.”

I quit that job almost a year from today after 2 straight days of hostile arguments with the owner’s husband (my last manager). Almost a year later, I am doing better. Look forward to seeing how year two goes. Probably worse because why would it get better. Someone wants to see me doing bad, so they have to get their wish. It’ll still be great, just not to the average idiot, so “bad”.

I clocked in a few seconds too late, aware this means one of my enemies (I’m their’s) wants me to be late to everything or off timing. Endlessly pissed about being a minute off my OWN schedule, but also give no fuck about what they want.

My head coach mentioned how I worked a lot of hours last week and would probably be thrilled when I checked my pay stub. I didn’t check, nor did I get thrilled.

Today, she and my assistant coach asked when I was going to get a phone, so they could text me if they needed to reach me. I laughed and said, “Never.” (Have been laughing about this since I left work, forgot my exact word/words). I said I have a phone, (2, actually) it just doesn’t have service. I said they could always call the number I have on file (housemate’s). She said, “What if you get a hot date?”. I say, I’ll just have to meet her in person. On my walk home I realized, I still needed a method of contact. I decided not to give Mary my tumblr or Instagram like I first thought and will give her my email, so she doesn’t have to give me her email, in case she thinks I’m crazy (I am). I’ll just tell her that though.

My African American manager got pissed when I was washing lettuce and got him wet. I said, “That’s kind of feminine.”…because girls…get wet. I don’t think he caught on. He said, “You were a male cheerleader! That’s the most feminine sport.”

I said, “MALE cheerleader. Also, it’s soccer. They’re literally called ‘grass fairies’.”.

He said, “Female dominated.”

I said, “Cheerleading was started by males. Also, I could knock everyone on the field, off their field. I gave up football to do cheerleading and it got me through college, plus most of the teams I cheered for sucked. They came to see ME!”.

He shortly after explained this to a female coworker when I said, “First you called me a ‘half nigga’, now I’m a fag.”. She didn’t get the “wet” joke either. She thought it was cool that I was a cheerleader though. I’ve been there for almost a year and just never bring it up.

Savings: $29 > $49

I love being a Chicagoan everyday. This city is so beautiful.

There’s probably more, but I don’t remember it all.

My mother just messaged me…for the 6th time. I wish she would stop. Estranged. Eternally.

In short, craving noodles…hard! My unnamed house type constantly gets new ideas. I miss television, film and social media. This will be my last Starbucks post. I won’t be grocery shopping again, so I’ll move my posts to McDonald’s. I used to love coming home everyday now I hate living in hostility and want to move every single night, but I imagine I’ll have a year or two left here and my current job location (love my job, don’t get shit confused). I will check Week 6 scores next week for the NFL. My African American manager has told like 3 of my coworkers and a manager that I was cheerleader. Starving is not so hard.

- MH (2023)

[10/13/2023 - 6:13PM]

#personal #poor chronicles #poor #poverty #life #lesson #life lesson #life lessons #guidance #struggle #chicago #2023 #LilMark #PUNKAssMark #afr0-thunder

[thatsouthernstate]

So I have to ramble about something for a second…. I went to see Andrew Scott in Vanya in London on Saturday…. I honestly think I’m still in shock…. Because I got to meet him too 🥹 I’ve been internally screaming since then. Like honestly. I don’t even know what to do with myself. But now I’m finally back home from London and can think a little bit clearer. Just a bit though 🫠🙃🤭

Going to see him on stage was already a bucket list item I got to check off. I’ve been dying to see him in a play in person and, my god, he didn’t disappoint. He was absolutely incredible! Spectacular. The fact that one man has so much stamina and emotional energy to play all of these characters by himself for almost 2 hours and make it funny and exciting and heartbreaking but somehow uplifting with no breaks at all… At one point he sits on the stage and sings “If You Go Away”, the English version of that Jacque Brel song and I nearly cried. It was so beautiful. And he has such a lovely voice! He really can do it all. I wish I could have stayed in London longer. I’d absolutely see it again in a heartbeat. Anyway! I continue to stand by the statement that he is one of the greatest actors of our time. I will die on this hill 😌

But then I actually met him…

I think I can now confidently say he may be the sweetest man on earth. Being a fan of his for awhile, I had no doubt… But he was just so… wow! You know how people say to never meet your heroes? Well, fuck that. Meeting mine was everything.

I’m pretty shy in general and knew for sure it’d be ten times worse in front of someone like Andrew who I admire so much, but I lined up anyway. First of all, there were so many people in line and he was so generous with his time! I was towards the front so I didn’t even see where the line ended but I’m pretty sure he stayed until every single person got their program signed! He was genuinely so friendly and chatting to people when he could while his security tried to keep the line moving. Of course when I got up to him, there was no way I was able to say anything but thank you. Luckily my mother, who tagged along with me to the play, did all the talking for me. Moms really are the best, aren’t they? We ended up having a whole damn conversation with him! I honestly don’t even know how it happened.

He’s so soft spoken and just… delightful! There’s no other way to describe him. At one point, my mom mentioned my Fleabag “It’ll pass” tattoo and since it’s on my wrist, I showed him quickly. I don’t know what I expected exactly, but he was like “oh my god that’s amazing!” I melted. Then he goes, “You know that’s my handwriting, right?” and I just about fuckin fainted. I told him yes of course I know and made a combination of these faces: 😭🥹🥰 Like for real. I have no doubt I looked like a complete idiot while this was happening. Because of course I had no words to explain that I got it in his handwriting because of how much he and the show have inspired me. I may have slightly blacked out actually. I don’t think I’ll ever be the same, y’all. And now every time I look at my tattoo I can only hear him asking me about it 😂🙈

Anyway, let me show the actual pictures now…

The stage!

And the man himself!

Just Andrew, drawing hearts all over on my program after seeing my Fleabag tattoo 🥰😍😩🥹

As a side note, this theater was absolutely gorgeous.

Okay, now I’ll shut up and go back to my little corner of tumblr. Just had to share for any Andrew fans who’d want to know — we stan an absolute sweetheart!

#andrew scott #vanya