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#also ive had this little scene where he drives to their house in his moms car after some late high school event
compacflt · 10 months
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what are bradley’s earliest memories of ice and mav? the bits of his perspective on them that you’ve written are so fascinating
fairly unsurprising answer but: ice: when he came to see Carole to apologize for killing goose in ch 2 of wwgattai (sets the tone of their relationship)
mav: something very benign like mav doing magic tricks for him as a little little kid. you know how your earliest memories are always a little fuzzy and always afternoon sunshine? imagine a desaturated maverick sitting crosslegged in the grass in pale afternoon southern california sunshine showing Bradley how he can detach his thumb from his hand and then put it back again. no blood, no bone, no pain, and he’s got this daredevil grin like he’s enjoying separating his thumb from his hand. can’t see his eyes behind his aviators. the best magicians are the ones who can make even their pain disappear. or, playing “got your nose,” holding Bradley’s nose up so he can see it right in front of his very eyes, NO PAIN!, and then making it disappear. “where’d your nose go, Gosling? oh, my gosh, I lost your nose!! how’re you gonna smell? i bet you’re gonna smell bad. get it? get it? —here it is, i found it, don’t worry, it’s all good!” and putting his nose back so everything’s ok. that’s Bradley’s earliest memory of mav.
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celiastjamesoscar · 5 months
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hi grace its been so long!! how have you been since we last spoke? 🤍
7 husbands of evelyn hugo finally arrived today!! im so excited to start reading it, im taking the day off work tomorrow to go up to the winter wonderland in london so i think i will read it on the train but it will only be for 20mins! :)
i was playing badminton today with one hand because of my splint and omg i tripped over again 😭 honestly i dont know whats happened to me ive suddenly got so clumsy
buggy was a nightmare today he went out of the little dog door we have and managed to escape through the fence early this morning at around 4am, into our neighbours garden and went through their open gate onto the street only to come up to our front door.
we have a ring doorbell which detects movement outside the house and rings automatically as my mum is very paranoid about someone breaking in, anyway because he kept running around on the drive it kept setting off the doorbell, honestly hes so annoying, he woke me up and i had to go outside in the cold and chase him to get him back after he kept running away from me
however i was watching the 3rd hangover movie yesterday and my mum was in the living room with me and when she glanced up at the screen to see chow and stu breaking in with the collars she now wants to get rid of the lil doggy door 😭
It has been entirely too long since we have last spoke my love! I’ve been doing good; I’ve almost finished my first semester of college. How have you been? Is your hand doing any better? 🤍
You’ll have to let me know what you think about it! It’s such a beautifully written book, so I hope you love it. Be safe on your train ride and have fun!!
Girl 😭 you are going to have to live in bubble wrap so you don’t trip anymore
Buggy is a menace and he must be stopped. Little dude went through all of that trouble just to go to the front door? I admire his dedication to torment you guys
I want to meet Buggy 😭 I need to experience his level of craziness at least once in my life. He was honestly running in front of that ring doorbell just to aggravate you guys and especially since he ran away for you. I envy him
I will never have a doggy door because of that scene in the Hangover and because of that one criminal minds episode where the killer got in through the doggy door. Your mom is a real one for wanting to get rid of it
Also, I’ve been working on your reporter!reader fic, and I’ve gotten a little over 11K words for it!
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itsjustashipperlife · 5 years
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ENDGAME THOUGHTS
So here it is. The longest post I’ll ever write, so bear with me. (I’m not kidding, this is HUGE).
I watched Endgame at 7 pm yesterday… Came back home at 11. And I posted that I would try to sleep and make this post today. You know how many hours I slept? Four. And I finally fell asleep at 3.30 am.
I will try to say all my thoughts on this post, so if I miss something, I’m sorry. (Note: although I like more characters, the IronFam, pepperony, irondad… Will be the main concerns here, so anti Tonys, get the fuck out)
SPOILERS AHEAD
I will try to say things that I liked first, then the ones that I didn’t like, and then we’ll get to the OG6 ends, okay? Okay.
THINGS I LIKED:
The whole movie has that atmosphere that this was it. The Endgame. And it really makes you anxious for the characters. 
Clint’s first scene with his family is heartbreaking
Tony being so soft (a dad) with Nebula was fucking everything
Although it was expected,  Carol rescuing Tony and Nebula was great. (I guess it’s because the message for Pepper was received… because then why was she waiting there?)
Tony saying “I lost the kid” killed me, and then he finally calms down when Pepper hugs him
Tony’s kiss on Pepper’s cheek
Tony cutting out Steve’s bullshit had me going “Yeah, honey! That’s it”
Seriously, he looks (and feels) like shit. And he gets the strength to get up, rip off his IV, and call him out before his body can’t stand anymore
What’s left of the team trying to fix it all, going to Thanos without second thoughts and killing him once and for all (okay, maybe not “forever”, but you know… Thor finally went for the head)
That “5 years later” gasp, seeing how the world is “moving on” after the decimation
Everyone’s fucking done, and tired, and hopeless (e.g. Nat, Steve, Rocket and Nebula, Rhodey, Clint…)
Nat’s break down, trying to stay positive about Clint, and about everything (also, Rhodey helping her, looking for Clint… Because in this blog, we love and respect Colonel James ‘Rhodey’ Rhodes)
Scott getting back from the quantum realm after (for him) 5 hours, to finally reunite with his now grown up daughter
Tony “moving on” (kinda). He has the life he said he wanted since AoU, with Pepper as his wife and his daughter, and living on a beautiful farm, away from everyone
Tony being the BEST DAD the MCU will ever see (no hate on Clint or Scott tho, it’s just my opinion). He loves her so much, and she loves her daddy too (3000
Morgan with the Rescue helmet
Tony kissing it
He carrying her inside to have dinner
The team getting to his house for help, cause he’s the only one that can do it
That shot of Tony pouring drinks for everyone in which we see his wedding band (because, of course, and like RDJ, Tony is that kind of man)
He being selfish about trying what Scott said. He has every right to be. Although Peter’s not there, he has Morgan. And he wants to be there for her. He’s allowing himself to be selfish for the first time in 15 years (being 2023 in the MCU right now… I think… technically…)
But… he’s Tony Stark. The selfless man the world will ever know. He can fix it, and he will
Nat, Scott and Steve talking with Bruce… or Hulk… or Proffesor Hulk (let’s call him Bruce)
Tony being domestic: doing the dishes, tucking his daughter in, the “I love you 3000″, and him being so cute with Morgan like… “whoa, honey, that’s a lot… that’s more than ‘tons’"
Him resolving the problems of the “time-travels” in a couple of hours… I stan one man… Also, Morgan seeing her daddy work and getting ice-cream before going to sleep. Again, the best dad
Once again, Tony being domestic talking with Pep (aka his wife, aka the love of his life, aka the mother of his daughter, aka his goddess, boss and queen), asking her what should he do, and Pepper, like always, being his voice of reason
Scott and Bruce trying to work with the quantum realm 
Tony driving to the compound like the badass he is (also, while being a badass, still being a dad and putting toys and a teddy bear out the way of Cap’s shield)
Bruce and Rocket looking for Thor, the appereance of Valkyrie, Korg and Miek, and Thor playing Fortnite. (I found all of Thor’s scenes very funny, but at the same time I didn’t feel like it was okay to laugh about it. He’s clearly depressed during the whole film, and every character-like every person- deal with depression and ways to cope in different ways… so I don’t think that laughing at Fat Thor was nearly okay)
Clint being a badass
His scene with Nat, holding hands
Rhodey with the best fucking idea of the movie (go back in time to baby Thanos, and… you know the rest). Again, I love this man
Bruce freaking out about it. And explaining the way the MOVIE works
Clint being succesful on the first try
The WHOLE scenes of the “domestic” team, getting up ideas of how they’re going to recollect the stones (Loved every single one of them, and I would gladly watch a film that was all about Nat, Tony and Bruce lying on a table and talking)
Jane Foster making a come-back (kinda)… Also, Thor is me when I’m doing a presentation 
Rocket calling Scott “puppy”
The team prepared. The whole “you know your teams, you know your missions” speech
The “unseen” parts of Avengers 1, after they got Loki
Scott giving 2012-Tony a heart attack and 2012-Thor helping with Mjolnir. All while actual-Tony gets the tesseract (for a while)
All of Rocket-Thor scenes in Asgard
Rhodey and Nebula laughing at Quill
2012-Cap vs actual-Cap (+America’s Ass), and the elevator scene
The ancient one and Bruce conversation
The whole thing with past and present Nebula
Stan Lee’s cameo
Tony and Steve going to 1970. Tony (aka Howard Potts… I died when his wife’s name is the first one that comes to his mind) talking to Howard Stark, having a dad to dad conversation, and Edwin Jarvis cameo. Meanwhile, Steve seeing Peggy.
Nat sacrifice for Clint. Clint crying afterwards…
The team decided to not let her sacrifice be in vain (+Bruce’s reaction)
Bruce undoing the snap
Past-Gamora helping actual-Nebula (+killing old-Nebula)
Thor, Steve and Tony fight with Thanos (while the rest of the team is trying to get the gauntlet)… (+THAT scene of Steve and Mjolnir)
THAT FUCKING SCENE WHERE ALL OF THE FALLEN AVENGERS COME BACK (+RESCUE!!) AND STEVE FINALLY SAYS “AVENGERS ASSEMBLE”
SERIOUSLY, THAT WHOLE SCENE
Rescue and Iron Man fighting back to back like the power couple they are
Rescue-Mom giving Spiderman and the gauntlet a ride
Tony and Peter reunion *sobbing* (+Groot and Rocket, +Hope and Scott, +Quill and Gamora)
THAT SCENE WITH ALL THE WOMEN FIGHTING TOGETHER (Pepper being the badass she fucking is!!)… The only woman I missed was Nat… *sobbing again*
TONY’S “I AM IRON MAN” 
PEPPER’S “ITS OKAY… YOU CAN REST NOW”
PETER SOBBING. PEPPER SOBBING. RHODEY HOLDING PETER
PETER GOING BACK TO NED AND MAY
THE VIDEO. “I LOVE YOU 3000″
THE FUNERAL WITH ALL THE TEAM (+HARLEY)
RHODEY AND HAPPY COMFORTING EACH OTHER BEHIND MORGAN AND PEP
“PROOF THAT TONY STARK HAS A HEART”
UNCLE HAPPY AND THE FUCKING CHEESEBURGUERS
Thor going with the Guardians (+Quill looking for Gamora)
Clint with his fam
Scott with his fam
Steve giving the shield to Sam
(this is kinda)-> Steve going to Peggy
In conclusion: MY HEART IS FUCKING BROKEN FOR THIS MOVIE, but nontheless I “loved” it
Okay… so now that we are done… Let’s talk about what I didn’t like:
I needed more Pepper/Tony moments, and more Pepper “mommy” moments
Uncle Happy was great… BUT WHAT ABOUT UNCLE RHODEY!
Steve, get out of the fucking way! Tony doesn’t need you now (at the begining of the movie). He needs Pepper, and Rhodey, and food, water and sleep 
Rhodey not getting a hug with Tony at the begining of the movie
Not May/Tony conflict/crying over their ‘son’
I don’t know if I like Howard’s and Tony’s talk… I do like it, but idk. I guess that in the movies he wasn’t physically abusing to him… But at least he gets to talk with his dad and he realizes he’s a very good dad with Morgan (aka, his “little girl” *sobs*)
TONY DESERVES BETTER. THE WHOLE IRONFAM DESERVES BETTER. MORGAN, PEPPER, RHODEY, HAPPY, PETER… MY GOSH, EVEN THE BOTS AND FRIDAY (I can’t talk about him in past tense, I’m sorry. I’m just in denial)
THAT FUCKING CHEESEBURGUER LINE (I swear, I will never get over that fucking line)
Steve getting to live his “endgame” with Peggy, leaving everyone behind (aka Bucky and Sam, but mostly Bucky) and being FUCKING SELFISH (in my eyes… and for what I’ve read, in a lot of actual Cap’s fans too)
How come that “the man who lays in the wire” is the one that leaves, and “the man who would cut the wire” is the one that fucking LAYS ON IT (again)
Alright. Now I’m going to talk about the OG6 ends. Although I have leave my points of view up… But I still want to talk about it more thoroughly:
Clint: Finally, Clint got his protagonism in the team. He’s going to do “whatever it takes” (and he means WHATEVER) to bring his family back. I liked his end, there’s nothing more to discuss about it.
Bruce: Yeah, Bruce finally got the best of both worlds, the mind and the strength… But what’s he going to do now?
Thor: Thor’s end was okay (IMO)… He doesn’t have the strength to be the king anymore… But Valkyrie does. And he has great chemistry with the Guardians, so I didn’t mind him going with them.
Nat: Nat’s ending was great. Let me explain. I didnt like that she died. But I felt it very on character… She has no family, her family are the avengers. And she wants to bring them back. Clint is like her brother (I’m a little into Clintasha tbh, but I accept that they give them that brother/sister relationship long ago. It proofs that not all the male/female friendships have to end in a romantic relationship), and she did anything she could to undo the snap during 5 fucking years.
Steve: Hated it (him). Yeah, you “loved” Peggy… Whatever. (The Russos trying to put Steggy as the Royal ship when everyone KNOWS that that title belongs, AND WILL ALWAYS BELONG, to Pepper and Tony). He’s just looking at the past, he has never moved on, and he never will. He let Tony gave up his family (at the age of 53… god, he had a lot to live for) and then he left Bucky behind (and the whole Hydra mess too), when he always was so nuisance about him all these years…
Tony: Hate/Love it. I love it because it’s the way of fully close the circle of this whole journey, and he’s the SAVIOR of the fucking MCU, now and always. Haters can shut their mouths now after what he did…
I hate it because… He’s my baby. He finally had the life he craved for all these years. Married to Pep, with his baby girl; trophy husband, doting father… and now he’s… gone. He’ll never see Morgan grow up (her first day at college, her first bf/gf, her graduation, her wedding, his grand-kids… any of it), he’ll never see Peter go to college either. Pepper will see all of that alone (not completely, because Happy and Rhodey will always be there, but someone will be always missing). Morgan won’t ever doubt that her daddy loves her, but still he won’t be there to kiss her goodnight, nor to tell her shitty bed time stories. (God, I’m crying again… and I really want to say I am joking, but I’m not).
Tony fucking DESERVED BETTER. 
The whole IRONFAM DESERVED BETTER.
Rhodey hold his head and pet his hair, with tears in his eyes that he refuses to let out. Peter calling him Tony for the first time ever… “We won” 
Also, Pepper is the STRONGEST WOMAN IN THE MCU. No one will EVER change my mind. She went into battlefield to help her husband, to protect their kid, and she hates violence. She fought beside him, helped defeat Thanos… And, when Tony (her Tony) was dying… She kneeled next to him, to reassure him that they would be okay, that he “can rest now”. And she didn’t break until he was gone. So the last thing he would see was her being the calm, competent person he knows she is. SHE FUCKING WAITS TILL HE’S GONE. SHE HOLDS HER TEARS AND HER SOBS SO HE WOULD FEEL OKAY. SO THAT HE COULD REST. And then, when the light of his arc reactor is out, and his hand is no longer in hers, she let it all out. She kissed his cheek one last time and sobs with her face buried in his neck… And I can’t deal with it.
Tony’s last message… “I love you 3000″ is another heartbreak. And the “Proof that Tony Stark has a heart” is the best… But the fucking cheeseburguers… If I weren’t sobbing and trembling during all that, the cheeseburguer was the charm that made me explode. It was over. It was really over. And that line made it true.
And the point is… I can’t read fanfics now. Nor see fanarts, fanvids, edits, you name it. Hell, I don’t think I’ll be able to watch any movie with Tony in it with the same eyes anymore… Any of the Iron Man movies, Homecoming, Civil War… It’s just too much. I won’t be able to watch Iron Man 1 again the same as I did before… with the cheeseburguer, and Pepper tears because she “hates job hunting”, Yinsen and his question about family, or the first time Tony flies out of his garage, with that huge, happy smile on his face.
Every time that I see 3000, I get fucking sad. And I was crying when I got home yesterday. When I calmed down a bit, I entered Instagram and Robert posted that photo of him and Jimmy Rich “holding” the A of Avengers and the tag #iloveyou #3000 and I fucking cried again… Fuck, I’ve been crying while writing all of this post.
I’m not even able to read some fluff fanfic from a couple of years ago… Pre-Infiniry war era to cheer me up. It just makes me sadden.
And… I think that’s it… I hope someone will read aaaaall my rant, but I can’t sum anything up.
.
TONY STARK, I LOVE YOU 3000 (ALWAYS WILL) 
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iron--spider · 5 years
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My Endgame writeup or whatever
Okay
I’m gonna try to go in order of what I can remember. I might not hit on everything. Up front I will say—it played better than actually reading the spoilers did. But is that even saying much? I don’t know. I have a very strange feeling about all of it and I absolutely have not processed it yet. I just keep coming back to this thought—I just don’t know. I genuinely don’t know
- I loved the Nebula and Tony bits on the Benatar. He was such a sweet, sweet calming dad. I wanted more of all this. They rushed through it.
- Uh. How did Carol know. Why did they skip her finding out where he was? I need more lol. I also wanted the scene where she originally arrived. Don’t assume shit about us, Marvel, just don’t skip important scenes.
- Side note: the pacing in the beginning is....bad. Really bad lol.
- I liked the Tony arriving back bit. I like everything about Robert’s performance here. How he said “I lost the kid” with such emotion (though does Steve know who he’s talking about?)
- Next scene was some of the BEST work I’ve ever seen out of Robert. Seeing him so skinny like that was horrifying. The look on his face when he saw Peter on the screen. Ripping out the IV, everything he said to Steve, pulling out the housing unit and dropping it in Steve’s hand and then collapsing. Oscar reel. That’s my baby and I’m proud. Damn.
- “up until a couple minutes ago I thought you were a build a Bear” lmfao
- uhhhhh the killing Thanos.....yeah whatever. It was weird. And annoying.
- If I could rewrite this movie, the five years later is exactly where I would start :) A misstep, in my opinion. I don’t believe Tony would trust himself to have a child after losing one.
- “your mom never wears stuff I get her” lol
- kid is super super cute but not a good actress. I had no idea what she was talking about most of the time because she spoke so low.
- Paul Rudd fucking nailed every single scene he was in. He was amazing and a star player to me. His face in the Cassie scene. So good.
- Nat was great in every moment she had.
- The scene with the photo. God. Tony was so absolute in his opinion—he was not going to do this time travel heist. It was risking too much. No way. Get out of my house if you’re gonna talk that way. But then that picture. He takes one look at it, this dead kid that still holds such a big piece of his heart. And the next scene he’s cracking time travel.
- Pepper probably always knew this was a possibility. Their conversation made me cry.
- I hate professor hulk. It’s so stupid. Hate it lol.
- Thor just...made me sad. He wasn’t a joke to me. He was so obviously devastated and sad and just....not himself. He couldn’t forgive himself. It hurt to see him like that.
- Love when Tony drives up so fast and gives Steve his shield back.
- Here comes my favorite parts of the movie honestly. I love the whole team figuring shit out stuff once they were all together again. Tony and Nat laying on the table together with pillows. Everyone eating snacks and talking. This is the kind of shit I wanted ALL. ALONG.
- I felt offended when they were trying to explain the time travel to the audience. It’s so obviously bullshit. It creates massive, massive plotholes and it’s bad. Bad.
- But I enjoyed it lmao. The 2012 stuff was so wonderful. The Hulk getting mad and wanting to smash the elevator and Tony being like “stop, stop” lmao. Tony checking out Steve’s ass. Steve checking out his own ass. 2012!Steve saying “I can do this all day” and our Steve being like “yeahIKNOW”. Scott giving 2012!Tony a mini heart attack and 2012!Thor being so concerned lol.
- Steve and Tony journeying to 1970 was great and I adore them being a team a lot. But I’m not here for the redeeming Howard. Don’t like that guy. Don’t. Like him. Only glad it gives Tony a bit of closure.
- Uh Nat and Clint killed me. I was a wreck. They were my original ship and that just....I really miss her and she didn’t deserve that. My beautiful girl.
- The scene when they’re back and discussing her death was so hard. Thor particularly hurt me with how he couldn’t accept it.
- I knew the whole last bit was coming and it just felt like this sense of impending doom. I hate that it happened, I hate that that dickhead came out of nowhere right when they were fixing shit.
- Okay. The last battle was really good. Steve with the hammer was great. But I wanted Tony to do more. They didn’t let him do enough there at all. I loved the shot of the big three looking at Thanos before they started to approach.
- Everyone cheered and freaked out when the dusted started coming back. Peter got the biggest cheer.
- That little sweet angel running over to Tony and picking him up. Starting rambling on about what happened because he’s got to fill his dad in. Tony looking at him LIKE THAT, just....struck by the fact that he’s back, unchanged, right here, in front of him. His kid. The kid that made him want to have kids. The hug was gorgeous. So sweet how Peter was like “this is nice”.
- Loved the ladies bit and Peter just like :o
- Pepper in her suit. So cool. I wanted more.
- Peter protecting the gauntlet. I love you angel baby. He was so good.
- The whole fight for the gauntlet right there in the end was so tense. I thought I would hate Tony’s last line because reading that felt contrived but it worked because of the way he said it. I didn’t like how long it took Thanos and his army to dust away. I thought it took away from Tony a little bit.
- The death was. Awful. It was better than I thought it would be, because he did get to whisper “hey babe” to Pepper, hold her hand, smile a little. Peter broke my fucking heart. But I hate the whole “you can rest now”. Pepper would fight for her man to the ends of the earth. It’s clear to me that they wanted to do this for shock and to subvert our expectations. It didn’t need to happen. It really didn’t. Like someone wrote on here, he could have lost his arm and it would have been shocking but we could have still.....saved him. It was so hard to see him like that. I was crying so hard I couldn’t really see much of it honestly lol. But I saw enough. It hurt like hell. It’s one of the worst if not THE worst death I’ve ever witnessed on screen.
- I went kinda catatonic after that. I don’t remember details. I was really mad that they put those words in Tony’s mouth about happy endings and not always getting that even if you want it. Fuck u russos and writers. Was Peter in the room for the message? Idk. He should have been.
- Annoyed they tried to make Thor be funny after that goddamn memorial.
- “proof tony stark has a heart” lord they really had to......hurt me in that way again.
- Uh the Steve ending is a huge, huge disservice to him. He’d never. He’d never lol. That means he ignores all these events he could stop. Yes, Russos, it fucking does mean that. That’s what u did to captain America.
- Like I read on @jess-b-thot’s blog, this movie should have fucking ended with Tony’s face, not Steve’s. It’s Tony’s story. Not Steve’s.
Ummmm when RDJ’s title card came up the whole theater stood and clapped. I was still crying. I cried so loud it was so embarrassing. I don’t really know how I’m feeling now. @whimsicalethnographies has said the word ‘adrift’ and that feels right. It definitely had some moments I enjoyed, but it was not a worthy ending. Tony was spectacular throughout and continually reminded me of why he’s my favorite and why I’ll just MISS him so desperately. Everything he says is memorable, everything he does is important. I want to etch every expression on his face into my heart. He also looked so beautiful and I just cried whenever I saw him because I can’t imagine that beautiful, precious man being gone. It’s a horrifying thought. He’s just so important, the beating heart of this universe, and they killed him for an emotional shock. That’s why I can’t accept it or accept this movie. They shouldn’t have done it. He deserves the ending Steve got. And since this was his last movie, he should have gotten WAY more to do in that last battle. That was a Steve fest. Moral of the story, Tony deserved better. But that was always the story. Tony deserved the world but the world didnt deserve him.
And yes, Iron Dad is canon. Tony would have stayed in that life he made, but he saw that picture and he couldn’t. If there was even a chance of bringing the kid back, he had to take it. Tony’s love for Peter saved the universe. I hope Peter knows that the whole world was saved because of him. Everyone is back because of him. And Tony is gone because he loved Peter enough to change the fabric of time and space to get him back.
They deserved more time.
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mattschues · 4 years
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Harder to Breathe || MEvan
Tagging: Matt Schuester and Evan Williams When: Saturday night Where: Matt’s house Notes: Evan talks to Matt about what’s on his mind.
Matt
Matt grabbed a couple slices of pizza and tossed them onto a plate. After a quick trip to the fridge he hauled the six pack over and set it on the coffee table. He knew Evan been going through things, the guy allowing a glimpse into that not too long ago in their texts and he figured they may talk a little more about it; hence the hanging around at the house and way from the public. "Want a beer?" He asked as he dropped onto the sofa with his plate. Matt reached over and plucked a bottle from the pack and popped the top off with a bottle opener. It'd been a long day and his body was somewhat sore from the football game earlier in the day. It was fun, though. It was always good to get out and play with friends.
Evan
Evan wasn’t very hungry, it came with being sad, the loss of appetite and all of it. I’m all honestly it felt hard for him to be there. Sure, maybe a couple days ago he wanted to talk about it but he was allowed to change his mind, right? Matt was a nice guy, he’d understand. Anxiety bubbles up in his stomach as he waits for the older man to bring up their previous conversation and the bite of pizza he takes drops in like a bomb. Maybe it wasn’t a great idea to be eating. If anything, he felt nauseous. He didn’t want beer. He shakes his head and puts the slice of pizza back on his plate, using a handful of napkins to clean the grease from his fingers. His hands then start digging into his jeans. He’s obviously nervous.
Matt
Matt chews a bite slowly and goes to wash it down after Evan declined a drink. He isn’t exactly known for prying. God knows he has his own things he wants to keep under lock and key. “Did you have to go into work today?” The weekends are the only times he doesn’t go into the coffee shop since those are his off days from the station. “We had this football game earlier. One of this girls vs. guys thing. The girls kicked out asses but it was all in good fun.” He chuckles at this and takes another bite. Between that and his time with Blaine he feels completely ravenous.
Evan
Evan shakes his head softly. In all honesty he was a bit hungover still. He had spent most of his Friday night drinking. At one point he didn’t even remember why he had begun in the first place. “That sounds fun.” He replies in the softest voice. He knows Matt won’t push him to say anything and Evan almost feels guilty taking up his time. He also needs to say something. Say what he needs to, out loud. “I’m confused.” He tells him hesitantly, his lip starting to quiver a bit.
Matt
One slice was gone after a few bites and Matt went to town on the next one. Not that he’s pigging out but there’s a solid change he’ll demolish at least one of the pizzas on his own. Matt set the plate on his knee and takes a long pull from his beer before he leans back on the couch and gives Evan a look over. That feeling returns. Something’s definitely on his mind. Matt licks his lips and places his bottle on the table with his plate. “What about?” He asks, leaning forward to show Evan he’s completely there.
Evan
Evan looks away from Matt. He felt embarrassed and guilty and scared. And he hadn’t even told Matt what was going on yet.  “Everything?” He lets out hesitantly. He shakes his head and wipes his face with his hand.  “I-.... I don’t know who I am. I don’t know what I want. What I like. I just...-“
Matt
Matt’s features soften at this and his heart went out to the guy. He knew he’s lucky when it comes to figuring out what drives him at a young age. Did that mean he has complete confidence he made the right call? Hell fucking no. “You’ve gone through all those years working and taking care of your mom. Looking after her and making sure she’s okay. It’s not like you had a whole lot of time to focus on you.” Matt remembers what Evan said, feeling that anger about his father threaten to surface. “Did something happen to get you feeling the weight of this this week?”
Evan
Evan sighed, he hated being emotional, especially around other people , but he felt safe with Matt. “I...Ive developed feelings for Blaine that I’ve never really had for a guy before? Fuck. I’m sorry.” He pauses and wipes his eyes that he can feel begin to tear up. “I know, I know you guys are a thing and I’m not here to break whatever you two have... I’m just, I’m confused. I’ve always liked girls. Always. And I never really had second thoughts about that. But then Blaine comes along and then staying with you and your stupid shirtless body, and I’m having all these feeling that I’ve never felt before and I mean, I’ve never even kissed a guy before. And I’m just like hoping this will blow over for me and maybe it’s just my age but I’m like really fucking horny all the time, especially when it comes to guys and it’s driving me crazy cause I keep thinking about what my dad would say to me and I know I shouldn’t care, but I do. I care too much. I just don’t know what to do, I just...” Evan can’t seem to stop rambling, his breathing even becoming more staggered, it was almost comedic, but he was in emotional pain.
Matt
There's a lot to unpack here and Matt stares at Evan, mostly to make sure he's finished speaking. Matt presses his lips together and nods slowly before he reaches out and places a hand on Evan's knee. "Hey. Just take a minute to breathe, okay? You don't have to unload everything you're feeling all in one breath but this is a good start." He squeezes his knee and pulls back and tries to think of what to focus on first. "Your dad bailed on you and your mom. He was a piece of shit and as much as I wish it's easy to forget things that leave a mark on us. I know it's not. He's not in your life. He hasn't been since you were twelve. He's not going to come around and talk shit about the people you're into. And even if he did resurface, so what? But coming to terms with yourself, recognizing your self worth and getting a better understanding of who you're attracted to. That can go a long way and can help you figure out where you want to go in life. You talked before about liking girls and now with Blaine, who I get. It's hard to not crush on the guy since he's basically America's sweetheart. That doesn't mean you're some awful person or you're doing anything wrong with finding him or my hot self attractive. Just means you're into guys and girls. You can be bi or pan. Or anything else. Hell you can just not go by labels which I tend to opt for but we live in a world where people need that for some reason." Matt quiets a moment and hopes he's saying the right things.
Evan
Evan flinches as he felt the man touch his knee. Thoughts of his dad rushing into his head of all the physical interactions and fights they’d been in. He looks at Matt and you can see the slight panic in his eyes. “I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to flinch.” Evan apologizes. He listens to what the man has to say as he takes in deep breaths to try and soothe himself.  “What if it’s all in my head? What if I don’t even like guys? I mean I’ve never kissed a guy or even done anything remotely sexual with a guy. What if I’m not bi or whatever else you said?” He pauses. “I just don’t want to put myself out there like that and then regret everything.”
Matt
"Then if you don't feel anything about it then you don't. You don't have to put yourself out there. You can be at a club or chat up a guy and see where it leads." There is a passing thought to lay a big smooch on his lips, just so he can have his first guy kiss, but Matt knows that it's bette for Evan to share that with someone who will want to more. There's also Blaine and he is so fucking head over heels for the guy he'd not do anything to hurt what they have going. "I knew I liked girls. Just like you. That was always known. Sure, there were some guys I felt something for but it wasn't until high school when I took that big step and kissed one. Then dated. People thought it was kind of weird but people will always have their opinions." Though he knows there are people just like Evan's dad, and worse, who want to hurt you for being yourself. "And maybe one guy doesn't do it for you, but it doesn't mean there won't that'll sweep you off your feet. Because sometimes those moments come when you least expect it. You could be having the most awful night and morning and just see a guy, or girl, and it's as if you're hit by a bus. But in a good way. Because life is unpredictable like that." Matt went quiet for a couple moments and an idea came to mind. "What if we go out to a bar or club? It can be just us or we can ask if Blaine wants to join in. Just go and cut loose. Maybe you'll find someone who you're into. Guy or girl. And see what happens."
Evan
Evans anxiety just kept building and he wasn’t feeling any better about anything. He knew Matt was trying to help but Evan wasn’t feeling up for it. He shook his head. “No, not my scene.” He replied to Matt. He left the unfinished slice and plate on the table and stood stood up from the sofa, a hand running through his hair. “I think I’m just gonna go.” He shrugged sadly. “I- uhm. I appreciate you listening to me.” He told him as he went to grab his coat.
Matt
There isn't a whole lot Matt can do at this point. Not when it feels like Evan wanted either some space or didn't like what he said? "Yeah, sure." he says as he moves to his feet and heads to the front of his house. "And it's cool it's not your scene. I don't know a whole lot when it comes to what you're into since we've been basically two ships passing in the night on the days you do sleep over." Matt's hand goes to the lock and turns it. "You plan to come back tonight or you staying somewhere else?"
Evan
Evan stayed silent, he felt like if he spoke he might start crying, but he didn’t want to cry in front of Matt. That’s the last thing he wanted. He didn’t want to look weak and helpless even though that’s how he felt. He shook his head as he finished buttoning up his coat. “I’m not coming back.” He whispered to confirm. Sure his apartment was cold but he’d live. He wasn’t sure he wanted to be staying at Matt’s anymore and it had nothing to do with Matt. It was all on Evan. It was his personal struggle and stubbornness.
Matt
Now this did cause to blink in surprise and he asks, "Why aren't you coming back. I thought with how thing are with the messed up heater you were going to keep here. At least until you find a new place." He knows better than to tug at the thread but the whispering and how it seems he can't get a good read on the guy; it's hard for Matt to not pry.
Evan
Evan wasn’t used to be taken care of. he wasn’t used to being thought of or anyone caring about what he did or if he would be okay. Maybe his mother tried to some degree but it was always him that did the caring for and held himself together. Just the thought that someone else cared enough to pry was overwhelming for him. Being and living at Matt’s house was overwhelming for Evan. The fact that he even cared where Evan slept was overwhelming. He knew Matt cared to some degree, but what if at some point he stopped? Evan couldn’t go through that. He takes a short shaken breath and he can’t look Matt in the eyes because he knows he’s start crying. “I-I’ll be fine.”
Matt
This isn't an answer. Not exactly and Matt looks at the door and then back to Evan. Everything about this does not feel fine and he's left in this place where he's not sure if he should say okay and let him leave. He's an adult and didn't any type of handholding. But he's an adult who sounds as if he's about to lose it, especially with what sounds like he's struggling to keep it together. "Do you feel like I don't want you here? I know last night I wanted the house to myself and I put that whole February deadline. Or is there something more? Maybe because of Blaine or the fact I don't like to sleep with a shirt on?"
Evan
Evan can already feel the tears start trickling down his face and he, himself, can’t find a reason why he shouldn’t stay. Maybe it was hard to see him and Blaine together. Maybe because Blaine was the first guy that made him feel something again and he knew it was unrequited, he knew it would never ever happen and he was fine with that. At least he thought so. Maybe it was the deadline and the anxiety that came with it. Like ‘Sure, stay with me but I don’t want you here forever.’ Evan understood that. He understood that perfectly. Or maybe it was the fact that he was horny 24/7 when he was here and he couldn’t really do anything about it. Sure he could call some girl up and get off but it wasn’t satisfying anymore. Maybe it was everything Matt had mentioned but he knew it was more than that.  Evan doesn’t want to respond, he doesn’t know how to respond or where to start or even where to end. He was endlessly fucked up and he knew that. He doesn’t even remember the last time he let himself cry. Sure, he was sad a lot of the time but he never really let himself cry.
Matt
Matt's seen his fair share of tears over the years, hard not to when he dealt with people coming to terms with their whole lives changing after some terrible happens. Or when they lose loved ones. That one...that one got to him. A lot. When Evan didn't make a move for the door Matt's hand slips from the door knob and he can see there's a struggle in play. That Evan's eyes may not be on him but that stray tear that lingers on the tip of his nose before dropping had him wanting to give this guy a hug. "Hey..." he spoke with a gentle tone. "You don't have to leave if you don't want. We can talk about something else. Put a video game on. Even a show or movie."
Evan
Evan let out a soft cry. It surprised him because he wasn’t used to it and now the tears were falling even more. His arm coming up to wipe his face and his sniffling nose. “I- I don’t want to talk.” He choked up as he looked at Matt.  He just wanted to cry,
Matt
There is a hesitation from Matt. If this is family or one of his closest buds there would no question about wrapping him into a hug. There is a lot about Evan Matt doesn't know and he understands he upset he's feeling. He may not have been through the same but he knows how bad your head can get. And, well, Matt did start to look at Evan as someone he can see himself caring about but was he about to overstep? This is one of those split second decision and Matt's heart won out when he steps to the guy, who was still sniffling and having a hard time getting words out. Matt's arms went around his body and as soon as he could he brings him close to hug.
Evan
The moment Matt wrapped his arms around him he began to sob into his shoulder.  His own arms clinging onto his sides. “I’m sorry.” He said in between cries and he couldn’t stop, as if he couldn’t control or turn off his emotions
Matt
As soon as Evan hugs him back, clinging to Matt in the way which tells him this is the right call, his arms tighten and he says, “It’s fine. You’re safe here.” Which he means completely. “I won’t think any differently of you, so get as much out as you need.” Matt knew all too well what it felt to crumble in front of someone. It’s why he’s worried about letting his true sadness appear. It’s why it was far easier to hide behind jokes and a charming smile.
Evan
Evan laid his head on the mans shoulders as he cried. He cried so long that he started to hiccup and his body was feeling heavy and tired. “C-can we sit, please?” He asked softly.
Matt
"Yeah, sure." Matt said, aware his hand is on Evan's back in an attempt to soothe him. "Head to the couch and I'll get you some water." And kleenex. But Matt kept those words to himself. "I think you should stay tonight. I know you wanted to leave before but you have a bed and warmth and there's also me who wouldn't mind getting a game in with you." Matt talks as he went into the kitchen and poured cold filtered water into a glass. He returns to the living room and plucks a kleenex box from an end side table and sets them both next to the pizza boxes.
Evan
Evan nodded and wiped his red nose, heading over to the couch. He slumps down on the couch and waited for the man to comeback. He kicked his shoes off and curled himself up on the couch. “Could we watch a movie instead? I don’t think I’m really up to be playing games.” He sniffled and took the glass of water from Matt. He took a couple sips before he put it down.
Matt 
After he settles down Matt picks up the remote and turns the TV on. He doesn’t have a whole lot of down time during the week but weekends are used to watch things on all the streaming services and play games. While he went to his HBO app he asks Evan, “What do you like to do for fun?” They’ve talked about his past and things from tonight but Matt know close to nothing him him. All he knows is clubs aren’t his scene.
Evan
Evan settles next to Matt. He felt so small. He felt like a little kid. He grabbed a decorative pillow and placed it against Matt, resting his head on it. “I like to go to the beach. Runs on beach, walks. I like to play volleyball. I really like music.” He lists quietly.
Matt 
He went to one movie to the next, mostly on the hunt fit one which both of them want to see. “Which you won’t get too much with the winter. Are you the outdoors type of guy? Camping? Hiking?” He went to the next row of movies, then to the next. “I love to hit up live shows whenever they come close to here and I’m not busy.”
Evan
Evan nodded. “Yeah, perhaps why My mood is lower during the holidays.” He starts. “I love being outdoors. California had really beautiful places to be. Especially to camp and hike.” Evan forgot how exhausting crying could be. He felt drained, physically and emotionally. He yawned quietly and nodded. “Live music is really good. The piano bar is fun to go to sometimes.”
Matt
There was no say on movie choices and Matt picks one at random. Half of the shit he watches is picked that way. “I get it. I have a physically demanding job but even with that I like to get out. Fresh air and all.” He set the remote down and picks his beer up before returning. Matt adjusts the pillow Evan used against his arm and places an arm across the back of the sofa. He thinks about what Evan told him tonight, especially the part about having feelings for Blaine. It’s one of those things he wants to be like Hell yeah because that’s the guy he’s super into. But another part feels somewhat guilty because Evan and Blaine work together and maybe have better chemistry than they do... That last part lingers but Matt doesn’t say anything. He knows what he and Blaine have feels incredible and they get along easily. “I haven’t been to the piano bar in, fuck. In a long time, actually. Want to hit it up next weekend?”
Evan
Evan feels a little calmer now but he's still feeling a lot of guilt. He shouldn't have told Matt how he felt about Blaine. He didn't need to know because Evan was never going to act on it and Evan knew that nothing would ever come of it. Blaine wasn't into Evan like that and Evan understood. Hell, until today, Evan hadn't really accepted the fact that he may be into guys. So the idea that Evan would ever be with a guy seemed far fetched. He just hoped he hadn't ruined anything for them. Still how was he going to feel when he saw the other man again. Would Matt tell Blaine what had just happened? Honestly, perhaps Evan preferred it that way, just so he would have to tell Blaine himself. It felt too heavy to go over it again. "With Blaine?" Evan asked?
Matt 
Matt watches the beginning of the movie. If looks vaguely familiar but he couldn’t place it. This happens a lot because she puts movies on at random and goes about his night until he’s ready to sit down. “I meant with you but we can totally invite Blaine to join us. He mentioned he plays piano and it’d be cool to see him perform on one.”
Evan
Evan sighs. “I’d rather it be just us.” He comments. “Not because I want us to like be alone or anything creepy like that but I just don’t know if I want to keep being around Blaine as much. At least until my feelings subside...” he confesses. “I don’t think it’s fair to you or him. And you guys really seem to like each other.” Evan tells the older man. “But He is really good at music. You should ask him to play for you sometime. He’s very talented.” Evan said fondly.
Matt 
He looks from the screen to the top of Evan’d head, staring at the blond hair before he smiles. It’s soft and one that shows that he gets where he’s coming from. He knows he can’t see it but they doesn’t stop him from doing so. “It’s cool, Ev. I don’t hold anything against you for telling me you have feelings for him. Shit. I’m surprised Blaine’s single because I imagine he has a line of men who want to date him. So it’s fine, I get it. I was crushing on him for a year and a half before I finally asked him out. So when it comes to you and me? We’re fine. What you tell me it’s between us. I told you before I won’t say a think and that carries over to this.”
Evan
Evan shrugs, his eyes glued to the screen even though he’s not doing much watching. “Still, I don’t want you to have to worry about me being around Blaine. Especially since we work together a lot.” Evan took his eyes off the tv and turned to look up at the handsome man. “I really appreciate you. I appreciate this and what you’re doing for me. Also for not being angry or upset about my feelings.” Evan gave him a small soft smile. “I feel very comfortable and safe around you. In a platonic way.” He tells Matt vulnerably. “Maybe it’s the whole firefighter thing.” He jokes.
Matt 
“I’m not worried, Evan. I feel very secure with what I have with Blaine. Which might sound weird since were only dating. But I’m not worried. And if Blaine tells me it’s not working, well. It’ll suck but I’m not gonna be pissed. And if he starts to see you then I will hope for the best because he’s just this incredible guy and he and anyone he’s with deserves happiness. But you really shouldn’t change how things are. You’re a good manager and I know he looks up to you to help guide him.” Matt says, speaking honestly. “I’m glad you feel comfortable. I’ve told you before this is a safe place for you. Firefighter or not, you can talk to me about whatever.”
Evan
Evan nods. “You’re good for him.” He smiles. “Thank you.” He repeats to the man and puts his attention back to the movie. It’s not long before his eyelids feel heavy and sleep starts to overcome his body
Matt
Matt quiets for awhile and drags his attention from the screen back to Evan, who didn’t say anything for awhile. Matt peers down and notices his eyes are closed. There is a moment he considers carrying him to bed but he thinks he might not want that. In the end Matt pulls the blanket from the back of the couch over and covers him with it. He shifts the pillow on his shoulder to position it on his lap and keeps it like this so it wouldn’t fuck up his neck. Matt stays this way until the movies over and slips away, leaving Evan there to sleep while he takes care of a few things himself before going to his room.
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merkerlerspeaks · 5 years
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My thoughts during Backwarder *Spoiler Warning*
- Oooh, interesting intro. That’s Master Fu! Aw, he had a sweetheart. 
- Who was looking so desperately for the Miraculous box way back then? Are we going to see more about that? 
- Adrien and Kagami were at the royal wedding???? Like, THE royal wedding? I should have followed that closer...
- “You mean like the time he lost his keys and locked himself out of the house” seriously I love Master Fu, that’s amazing. 
- wHy ARe yoU SAyInG WhAt yOu’Re WRitING ouTLouD
- Props to the dude that stood up for Marinette though
- “My time has come” seriously Hon, you’re such a drama queen. 
- But he seriously sent for Marinette to deliver a love letter because he was c o n s t i p a t e d. I mean it happens to the best of us but smh. Eat veggies ya old fart. 
- Marinette, taking care of the Miracle Box? Woo! GO gir- wait a minute. First he chooses a 13 year old to be the superhero of Paris and now he also chooses that same kid to take care of the Miracle Box? I mean it would make sense that he would want the same person he chose to take over once he’s gone but she is a CHILD, Master Fu. If she’s keeping that box she’s going to be more at risk than before. I mean it’s sweet and all but I don’t know how I feel about this. 
- Also she put the prescription in with the letter for Adrien I think we can all see where this is going
- Also my unobservant brain skipped over this the first time I watched it but Kagamis Mom is blind?? That’s pretty neat. I thought of Toph.
- ”What I want more than anything else in the world is written on this piece of paper” girl you gave him the prescription!! Check your letters!
- Check your letters!
- MARINETTE DUPAIN-CHENG CHECK YOUR FREAKING LETTERS. 
- Well we have officially learned that Marinette is the type of person that doesn’t check drive-thru orders until she gets home. 
- Gabriel:*growls and cringes away from possible contact with a stranger* Me: Well that’s only just the most relateable scene in animated history. 
- Ayyy, Pigeon Boy is here today!
- Whoa, Marinette can just reach into her Yoyo and pull stuff out? Convenient. 
- Speaking of that, again, Marinette CHECK. THE. LETTERS. Seriously, you just pull it out all folded up and hope it’s the right one before passing it off? How does that not BUG you? *badum tss*
- “I aM GabrIEl aGreSTE And Im nOT FeeLInG WelL” woah there boy that’s a little agresteive don’t you think? 
- ....The man has a portable akuma. You know, just a lil somethin somethin in case you gotta make a quick supervillain on your trip out of town.
- How does no one hear him laughing?? Like??...welp, Paris is the city of love, and love is supposed to be blind. Whatever. 
- “I better go check on my father” “Occupied!” Pfshhhh that is hilarious. 
- “Then I’ll be able to get my hands on all the other magic jewels as well” *not a direct quote* Wow, for someone who is supposed to be just trying to get his wife back, he sure has gone mad with power huh? 
- Woah, that lucky charm though. That took some accuracy. Good job, Ladybug. 
- That cute lil face Chat made when she told him to speak backwards like “I’d love to M’lady but uh...”
- Was a little risky though, if it wasn’t perfect he coulda accidentally cataclysmed the lady instead of the akuma. 
- That lil hand kiss though! Ah!! They’re so cute. 
- He literally evil laughed right before coming out of the bathroom and Adrien H E A R D it. HOW DID NO ONE HEAR HIM. 
- Also why are they talking about the miraculous so openly! Pigeon man is right there, and Marinette was eavesdropping easily. Call me picky but that kind of stuff needs to be spoken about behind closed doors. 
- Are we gonna see old people kiss? No? Okay. 
- How excited the girls were to hear about Marinette and Adrien though! They’re so supportive! It’s adorable as heck??!
- Adrien literally spent his whole weekend looking for something he thought Marinette needed. That sweet kid. Like he was probably so confused but. He did it anyway. I mean constipation capsules. Not just any guy would get those for a chick 😂 many would be grossed out. He is such a sweetheart. A confused little cinnamon roll.
- Rose’s last line isn’t all that wrong tbh
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mcxicanchef · 6 years
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[ diego boneta, cis-male, he/him, twenty-six ] MEXICO EN LA PIEL by LUIS MIGUEL? whenever i hear that song, it reminds me of MAXIMILIANO HERNANDEZ. maybe because they’re CAPTIVATING but also HOT-HEADED. they’ve been living at mulberry apartments since MARCH of 2014 in APARTMENT 314 and have 1 ROOMMATES. 
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... i have no explanation for this. i love diego boneta, i love tragic stories, i am mexican and proud... so here you have this, it’s a wild ride (i keep telling you guys that but.. i mean, it is wild alright) so without further ado.... here it is, max:
he was born and raised in mexico city and moved to baltimore 4 years ago (he also did high school in usa tho js)
his estranged father is a wealthy mexican politician whom he’s never had any type of relationship with, on the other hand, his mother is a hardworking seamstress whom he adores and they have a very close relationship.
growing up, he always had to work to help his mom sustain their little family, he worked as busboy and packing groceries, on his free time between school and work he would sing, which sometimes would get him money.
at the age of eleven, advised by a friend, max entered a talent show in a big mexican tv network, although he didn’t win, doors opened to him since he made it to the finals. (i might’ve based the talent show part on DIEGO’S REAL LIFE don’t judge that’s how i met him and ive been in love with him since)
max got to star in some novelas and even recorded some albums and bought a better house for him and his mother, he was living the dream, but quickly the boy grew tired of his life in the spotlight and decided to retire to live a normal life.
he quickly realize his love for cooking and food, and decided he wanted to become a chef someday
years later, when he was in high school, max met natalie and he fell in love with her from the moment he first met her. they were meant to be and married the day after they graduated high school and moved back to mexico together, despite natalie’s wealthy family disapproval of the relationship (and many failed attempts to break them apart)
a few years later, on natalie’s twenty-first birthday, she surprised max with the news that would change his life: they were expecting their first child. he immediately got a job on one of the fanciest restaurants in mexico city as a sous-chef while natalie continued studying to become a lawyer and they prepared for the arrival of their first born.
on june 6th, 2013 arturo gonzalez gimenez was born.
the family lived their first year happily, loving each other unconditionally.
for max’s 23rd birthday, natalie planned a massive party on the restaurant he worked in, however the night went sour when natalie’s family showed up and created a big scene that ended up in a car chase and finally, a car crash where natalie sadly was killed, max’s whole life fell apart (especially since he was driving and under the influence)
in order to provide for his son, max decided to contact one of his old bosses who said he could get him a job in a restaurant he used to work at in baltimore, and max did just that
max and arturo moved to baltimore three months after natalie’s death
although he adores his kid and is the only reason why he even tries to get up in the morning, he can’t help but feel responsible for natalie’s death, not to mention he hasn’t been able to deal with her death accordingly, so he has a bit of an alcohol problem he keeps mostly to himself
his biggest dreams are centered in arturo’s future and development, he also wants to open his own restaurant or even a food truck, he is fascinated with the idea
personality wise, he tends to be a tad closed off about his past since it hurts him and is a bit immature since he never got to truly live his childhood (reason why loves being so involved in arturo’s life and childhood and would do everything to give him what his son wants), can also be hot-headed.
however, despite all the hurt he’s endure, max is a hard-working, caring and easy-going young man who really just wants his little boy to be happy and wants to see everybody happy. also a bit flirty? he hasn’t had a relationship since natalie because it’s hard for him bc he is a dad and he is still very hurt about his wife’s death.
oh yeah he is v mexican and v proud, js
i love y’all and i am sorry for this and all my characters but if y’all wanna plot hmu or like this and i’ll come to you soon PROMISE ily all sm tho u have no idea
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sugaabooga · 6 years
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The Holiday Ghost
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Pairing: Kim Jaehwan x Reader
Genre: fluff, little angst?, bullet scenario, ghost!Jaehwan
Word Count: 3.2k
Summary/Extra: MERRRRRRRYYY CHRISTMAAAAASSSSS!!! Part of the Christmas Packages:) thought i should start posting the writings ive finished even tho a lot of the kpop fandom has been through hard times last week! i’ve also extended this holiday thing until the end of my winter break, January 8th. ENJOY!
So you’ve never really been a fan of horror movies
But one day in the middle of December, winter break, your friends Jihoon and Woojin suggest the three of you watch the new horror movie that had recently came out
That was the worst decision you have ever made in your whole entire life
You couldn’t walk back home alone and made both the boys walk you
But either way it was scary
bc they wouldn’t stop scaring you!!!
“Y-Y/N….”
“STOPPPPP!!”
“THERE’S SOMETHING BEHIND YOU!”
And they would start sprinting down the sidewalk and leave you to stand alone in the flickering street light
You almost burst into tears
Jihoon and woojin felt really bad after you had a near panic attack
so Jihoon ends up walking in front of you and woojin walks behind you
b4 they leave they remind you that it’s not real and ghosts don’t exist
Blah blah blah
Their little assurance somewhat calms you
BUT YOU REALIZE YOUR PARENTS AREN’T HOME
IT’S LATE WHY AREN’T THEY HOMEEEEE
DID THEY DIE!? IF YOU GO IN THE BATHROOM WILL THEY BE LAYING THERE!?
you start running around the house and turn on every single light you have
you know you shouldn’t, but you really don’t wanna risk seeing a dark shadow in the mirror as you brush your teeth then be led to your death, so you don’t even step a meter near the bathroom
you change in the corner of your room so nothing would be able to stand behind you
You walk backwards into your bed then create a little house around your head with all your stuffed animals
you somehow fall asleep despite the feeling you had of someone watching you
But during the middle of the night you hear soft strumming of the guitar
At first you think that it must be your next door neighbor, Joshua playing his little morning warm-up
Then you see the time from your half opened eyes and holy shiz it’s only 2am
you start to hyperventilate and you can’t even close your eyes
Bc what if the killer ghost is hovering right above you when you choose to open them again
You can’t risk it
the strums come closer and closer to your window
and you feel yourself sweating more and your breathing becomes ragged
but then you hear humming of a soft, light tune
it makes you think back to third grade, first day of school
you remember a kid who always brought a ukulele to school
tbh you had a crush on that boy, but you couldn’t remember his name
he always sat with you whenever you mom was late to pick you up and he would play a short theme song like from a popular cartoon
his songs always assured you that your mom was coming to pick you up soon
and it helped you forget all the bullies and frights you had
the song that you were hearing rn was oddly familiar and it comforted you
The strums were nowhere near creepy, surprisingly and the hums lulled you back to sleep
When you wake up in the morning, you hear guitar strums again
your heart beats erratically but then you realize
The sun’s out
Which means
It’s bright and daytime
Which meanss
NO GHOSTS
Which meanssss
It was your cute neighbor joshua hong playing his guitar and singing with his heavenly voice
You just lay in your bed after opening your window a bit more so you can hear him sing
But then you realize….
It wasn’t joshua’s voice
Joshua had a softer, gentler voice
This voice was soft and gentle….
But there was strong emotion put into each word sung
way more emotion than a morning warm up
you slowly get up and peek out your window to see…
Nothing
You notice that the singing and guitar stopped as well
you slump back into your bed then think back to the horror movie from yesterday
It couldn’t be….
A GHOST!?!!?!?
You start screaming and crying at the same time when the scenes from the movie come rushing into your brain
You hear footsteps come up the stairs and you start screaming even louder
But stop when you see that it’s just your mom
“WHAT’S GOING ON!? IS EVERYTHING OKAY!?”
“MOOOOMMMMM!!! I THINK OUR HOUSE IS HAUNTEDDD!!”
cue your mom hitting your back and yelling at you
“I THOUGHT SOMETHING HAPPENED!”
“SOMETHING DID HAPPEN! I HEARD A GHOST SINGING!”
that just makes your mom even more mad
her slaps just drive you out of bed and you soon find yourself sitting out on your porch
You were currently rubbing your hands over your arms
bc it was FREAKIN cold
you couldn’t believe your mom had kicked you out of the house in the middle of December
you’re muttering to yourself how cold it is then you see a guy with a guitar slung over his shoulder walking down the sidewalk and across the street about to pass by your home
He seemed to be in a good mood
humming and all
but something just seemed off about him
he was rather….. pale
like transparent pale
you’re kinda worried bc what if this guy was rlly sick or something and he didn’t know about it bc he seemed to be in a good mood
“Hey!”
You yell from your chair and wave your arms
he turns to you and stares at you for a bit then keeps walking
you’re like “uh wut?”
you go down the steps and you honestly don’t even know what you’re doing
your feet were moving on their own
you felt like you had to help this person
“Excuse me?”
you call out, but the guy DOES NOT STOP WALKING
could he not hear?
you jog up behind him and reach your hand out to tap him
but
your hand goes through him
“AHHHH!”
the guy suddenly whips around in shock and looks at you with an equally bewildered look
you’re frozen on the spot
you can’t move no matter how creepy the situation is rn
“d-do you see me?” he almost whispers
“n-no”
He just starts laughing and it freaks the hell outta you
What kind of psychotic laugh was that!?
You felt shivers run up and down your spine as he tried to calm himself down
you slowly try to step away from him but Jaehwan does that creepy, nervous, cute looking smile
like do you know what smile im talking about
and he asks you “where are you going?”
your mind’s just going ‘GTFO GGTTFFOO”
you attempt to turn around and run, but you just fall flat on your face
How comedic would this look from your window?
“Are you okay?”
“STOP DON’T COME NEAR ME!”
tbh jaehwan is disheartened at your tone
He was ecstatic that someone could finally see him, but now they were getting scared bc of him
He just ignores those feelings and nervously chuckles
you don’t hear anything for a while and you start to stand up
then you hear music
Those guitar strums
that voice
Both those factors reminded you of that one boy who played to you
you frantically look around, but you couldn’t seem to see anything
then, you spot that ghost guy from earlier
he was sitting on the side of your house, leaned against the wall
If jaehwan remembered anything about humans, it was that they seemed to calm down when there was music
you slowly walk over to him, your feet making crunching noises on the fresh snow
You just stand across from him listening to his voice
when he stops you look at him in surprise and disappointment
“Why’d you stop playing?”
Jaehwan smirks
“You seemed pretty calm enough”
he stands up to take his leave
“Y-You’re voICE IS NICE!”
you’re still kinda creeped out about the fact that he’s a ghost AND WHY ARE YOU SEEING HIM!?!!?
but he just had this familiar comforting feel
you stop him by reaching out for his arm when he merely smiles at your compliment and starts to walk away from you
then remember he’s a frkn ghost
but as you retract your arm you feel the cloth of his jacket
0o0o0o0o000o0o0o0
why were you able to touch him!?!!
Jaehwan can feel after all these years
More like a few months but
“ARE YOU MY SOULMATE!?!?!”
Kim jaehwan plz
you’re like “bro wtf?”
he proceeds to explain how if a human can see him and touch him, he gets a chance to go to the afterworld
for some odd reason, jaehwan was rejected bc he had someone in the real world who wasn’t ready to let him go
This usually wasn’t a problem but the wanting of his presence was REALLLLLYYYY STRONG
So he had to stay in the human world until he found that human and spent three weeks with them to convince them to let him go
“Are you saying it’s me?”
“There’s really no one else who could touch me”
He honestly didn’t know why you were able to touch him
Let alone SEE him
but he felt like you were the owner of that strong, unseen force of wanting his presence
you’re really confused tho bc you’ve never seen him b4
“IM JAEHWAN!”
he suddenly blurts then grins
“....y/n…”
and like JAEHWAN REMEMBERS YOU
You were that one girl who he always played his ukulele for in elementary school!
he had once seen you cry bc you’re mom was running really late and he walked home so he stayed an extra twenty minutes just singing and playing until you cracked a smile
But maybe you weren’t that girl bc he knew at least two other ppl named y/n
Anyways
he doesn’t mention that he may or may not know you and just follows you into your home
by then your mom is calmed down from this morning
there’s already a plate of pancakes set on the table for you
Jaehwan takes a tour around your home while you eat
You finish eating then hear his laugh again
You temporarily forgot there was a ghost in your home, so you freaked but then
“Right… jaehwan”
After you wash the dishes you go up to your room but jaehwan’s already in there
WEARING A FRKN BRA
you clamp your hand over your mouth so you don’t scream from the shock, but instead, you start laughing
“I WISH I COULD TAKE A PICTURE OF YOU RN!”
you’re literally on the ground and Jaehwan just smiles at you and sits on your bed
STILL IN YOUR BRA
“STOP TOUCHING IT!”
it’s only been a few hours of spending time w/Jaehwan in your room
but you feel like you’ve known him for years
he told you about the day his first tooth fell out all the way to the last time he was still existing
you had shed some tears during his talk about his death and what he had felt when he saw the car barreling towards him
soon, a week passed
It was Christmas
You open up your presents
You had asked for a guitar and there it was
You honestly had NO KNOWLEDGE about guitars whatsoever, but the instrument always caught your eye
But ya know
Jaehwans a pro at guitar
So he basically teaches you the basics and helps you get started
You bond even quicker bc of the guitar lessons
And seriously
You never realized you would be best friends with a ghost
Christmas passed by really quickly with Jaehwan hanging out w/you all the time
his presence was always comforting
butttt a lot of your relatives prob thought you were crazy from giggling out of the blue and appearing to talk to yourself
you wanted to tell jihoon and woojin about jaehwan but you couldn’t find the time to meet them during the break
Soon it’s December 31st
third week
Jaehwan had mentioned his past b4
Especially he was now 99% sure that you were the one not letting him go after seeing, from your pictures, that you WERE that girl from like 14 years ago
you didn’t even realize that you were holding on to him from leaving this world
you didn’t even know that you were always missing that one kid in elementary school, who always managed to put a smile on your face and brighten up your day
you now knew that you were the one keeping Jaehwan from leaving to where he belonged
behind the Heaven gates
you kept putting it behind
“I’ll talk to him tomorrow…in three days…. next week….”
until it was New Year’s Eve
10:05pm
You were sitting out on Ong Seongwoo’s empty patio w/Jaehwan
Ong Seongwoo - a freakishly rich dude that somehow became friends with Jihoon and Woojin despite the four year age gap
Seongwoo had thrown a New Year’s Eve party
there were mostly college kids, but a few high schoolers from jihoon and woojin’s dance team were also invited were at this party
You have no idea how you were at this party, but woojin had insisted you come
you had spent some time talking with some of the dancers’ girlfriends and with Jihoon and woojin, but decided to get some fresh air bc the loud music and smell of alcohol was too much
Jaehwan hadn’t come with you even tho he begged to come as long
you wanted jaehwan to stay home
Just in case you did something completely embarrassing
but one thing you should know
don’t ever trust kim jaehwan
Especially when he’s a ghost
you were just gazing out into the night sky when you saw a glowing figure
you were about to freak out
BC ANOTHER GHOST!? JAEHWAN WAS ALREADY A HANDFUL
but then you saw that it was just Jaehwan
the ghost that you had somehow fell in love with
You really wished he was a person
As jaehwan spent more and more time w/you
the less and lesser you would be able to tap his shoulder, give him a small hug, or even high five him
It was like the very first time you tried to tap his shoulder, the first time you met
your fingers just went through him
you knew that you couldn’t let go of him
you missed his presence whenever you would wake up and not see him there on the floor, gazing blankly at the ceiling
Jaehwan was prob just lowkey stalking your other neighbor, Hwang Minhyun
I mean he still couldn’t believe someone could be so…..
clean
anyways
you don’t think you would be able to live without him
but that was just your selfish desires
You knew the longer jaehwan spent his time in the real world, the more dangerous it would become for him
Jaehwan would be turned into a human, but obviously he had to experience another death since he’s not supposed to be alive
but if that happened, he wouldn’t even get a chance to go to trial to go to Heaven
you didn’t want that
you would rather miss him for a bit then see him again in the form of an angel
so you decide to let him go at exactly 12am, January 1st of the new year
when jaehwan appears, he already knows you made up your mind
he could just tell from your eyes
both the sadness and determination
“Y/N?”
“Yes, Jaehwan?”
“I’m sorry I forgot I was a ghost the other day and tried to carry your guitar.”
you chuckle at his belated apology
“No worries”
The two of you spend the rest of the time talking about the three weeks you’ve spent together
it felt like you had been with him for years
Before you know it, it’s 11:58pm
ppl inside are already starting the countdown
Two minutes b4 the new year since seongwoo’s like that
Both of you know you’re running out of time
and you just suddenly break down in tears
you became so attached to the ghost in front of you in a matter of three weeks
It was like fate had brought you two together after he had died and give you the time to grow love for one another just to break you apart again
sure, it was only three weeks
But you already knew that you would be willing to spend the rest of your entire life with him
You had literally seen all sides of jaehwan
The good sides, the bad sides, the funny sides, the broken sides
“I love you, Y/N”
you look up in surprise
You were half expecting to be like
“AHhAHhahHAHkakkjakH LOVE YOUUUU”
And joke about it but
nope
you look in his eyes and you know he’s not joking around this time
your eyes were still half-filled w/tears, so you quickly rub them away in order so you can see jaehwan properly
But he’s fading away
WHY WAS HE FADING AWAY?
Jaehwan steps closer to you and you can actually feel… body heat?
you missed being able to actually physically touch jaehwan
he sadly smiles and all you see in his eyes are tears and genuinity
“I love you”
you hear the loud cheers of the people inside counting down from ten to finally celebrate the new year that will bring new New Year Resolutions and fresh starts
The countdown slowly fades away as you see the space between you and Jaehwan grow smaller and smaller
Just as you close your eyes and feel a light touch on your lips,
“ONEEEE WHOOOP!!!”
You hear cheers grow the loudest they’ve ever been that night
The touch…..
it’s gone
Jaehwan….
is gone
After Jaehwan just disappears into thin air, everything else is a blur
You remember woojin coming out to find you squatted down on the ground, about to cheer how it was the new year, but instead sees your face in your hands, and tears streaming down your face
he knew better than to ask what was wrong
he immediately takes you home and wishes you a Happy New Year and leaves a light, shy kiss on your forehead
if you hadn’t met jaehwan in the duration of your winter break, you prob would’ve been bursting with happiness rn
You had always had a small crush on woojin
but obviously it all changed when you had seen jaehwan
Instead, you offer a small smile, thank him for being such a supportive friend and bid him a safe walk back home
you trudge back into your room and fall face flat onto your bed
you want to cry
and…. you do
But as you struggle to calm down and get up to wash your face and move on with your life….
you hear a tiny crinkling of paper
you look over, confused and see a small piece of paper sticking out from the first fret of your guitar, fluttering from the wind that was being let in from your slightly open window
with trembling hands, you open it up and let some more tears fall
happy tears
“Merry New Year’s, Y/N! Don’t miss me too much. :P Move on with your life. Don’t forget about me though! I still want some attention you know lol (i used that slang word! Lol keke I saw it when you were texting that friend of yours lol) Thanks for letting me go. I will never forget you and all the things we’ve been through even though it’s been only three weeks. lol…
I love you. - Kim Jaehwan”
as you struggle to keep in your tears and not roll his eyes at his overuse of the “slang” word ‘lol’ you notice something falling out from the small note he had left
you crouch down and pick it up from the floor to see
his guitar pick
38 notes · View notes
poorquentyn · 7 years
Note
I'm re reading IT right now (slowly, as adult life is getting in the way) and was wondering what other bad storytelling choices you thought king made besides the. Uh. Sewer scene? Its been years since ive read it and nothing else really stood out to me as poor storytelling that i can remember. I'll read it for myself eventually but was curious of your thoughts. Love your blog!
Thanks! Stephen King often veers into caricature with his supporting characters, and It is no exception. The way he describes Eddie’s mom and wife physically goes well beyond the narratively useful purpose of establishing how their weight disorders have intertwined with Eddie’s hypochondria and into “ugh fat people are gross” territory. I don’t think King has conscious malignance in this area, because he finds a proper balance with Ben: the latter describes in realistic detail how he lost weight over time, his mom is upset that he’s eating less but is presented humanely (as someone who associates her son eating a lot with her doing well as a single mother), and King manages to avoid shaming Ben for his weight while also acknowledging that Ben personally feels a lot better about himself after having shed it–or rather, because of the confidence he gained in himself by taking charge of the situation. The idea here is not “Ben needs to lose weight because gross” but rather “Ben needs to be in control of his body.” 
The good doesn’t wipe out the bad, nor vice versa; gotta consider them both in context. Main characters are naturally going to get more nuance than supporting characters, but necessary shorthand can easily turn into harmful caricature. And of course, a storytelling choice that seems solid in isolation can become a problem within the work as a whole. Beverly is sexualized throughout It in a way that’s often very unpleasant to read, associated throughout with violence and misogyny. Sometimes this works, as a way of peeling back the layers of petty ego driving a man’s man like her husband Tom; he explodes at her in their introductory scene because her paying attention to Mike’s call instead of him makes him feel like he’s literally not there. Other times it doesn’t, like when King lingers on the “smell” that Bev and her father “make together” now that she’s reaching puberty. We don’t need that to get the point that Bev’s father has inappropriate feelings for her–we got that from Bev’s mom asking if he ever touches her. When you put both sides of the coin together with the infamous sex scene in the sewers and the amount of time spent on whether Bev will choose Ben or Bill, it starts to look less like King was taking a stand against objectification by showing its omnipresence than that he simply didn’t know what to do with Bev as a character without constantly making reference to sex, rape, assault, and molestation. While she does get some right to response on these matters, I don’t think it’s nearly enough. It pushes back against a mindset that casually treats women like objects, but fails to establish a counter-narrative rooted in the female characters as individuals, fleshed out beyond their relationships to the men around them. It’s less a question of Does Stephen King Hate Women than one of imagination and empathy. 
Of course, some flaws are lessened by context, rather than enhanced by it. Take, for example, our protagonist William Denbrough, a blatant author insert. Bill is a popular horror author (check) whose books are increasingly being adapted for TV and film (check) and who has a rather tense relationship with critics and academics (double check). The latter is spelled out in an extended flashback to Bill’s college days, in which he takes a stand that ought to be very familiar to anyone steeped in modern media discourse:
Here is a poor boy from the state of Maine who goes to the University on a scholarship. All his life he has wanted to be a writer, but when he enrolls in the writing courses he finds himself lost without a compass in a strange and frightening land. There’s one guy who wants to be Updike. There’s another one who wants to be a New England version of Faulkner-only he wants to write novels about the grim lives of the poor in blank verse. There’s a girl who admires Joyce Carol Gates but feels that because Oates was nurtured in a sexist society she is “radioactive in a literary sense.” Oates is unable to be clean, this girl says. She will be cleaner. There’s the short fat grad student who can’t or won’t speak above a mutter. This guy has written a play in which there are nine characters. Each of them says only a single word. Little by little the playgoers realize that when you put the single words together you come out with “War is the tool of the sexist death merchants.” This fellow’s play receives an A from the man who teaches Eh-141 (Creative Writing Honors Seminar). This instructor has published four books of poetry and his master’s thesis, all with the University Press. He smokes pot and wears a peace medallion. The fat mutterer’s play is produced by a guerrilla theater group during the strike to end the war which shuts down the campus in May of 1970. The instructor plays one of the characters.
Bill Denbrough, meanwhile, has written one locked-room mystery tale, three science-fiction stories, and several horror tales which owe a great deal to Edgar Allan Poe, H. P. Lovecraft, and Richard Matheson-in later years he will say those stories resembled a mid-1800s funeral hack equipped with a supercharger and painted Day-Glo red.
One of the sf tales earns him a B.
“This is better,” the instructor writes on the title page. “In the alien counterstrike we see the vicious circle in which violence begets violence; I particularly liked the “needle-nosed” spacecraft as a symbol of socio-sexual incursion. While this remains a slightly confused undertone throughout, it is interesting.”
All the others do no better than a C.
Finally he stands up in class one day, after the discussion of a sallow young woman’s vignette about a cow’s examination of a discarded engine block in a deserted field (this may or may not be after a nuclear war) has gone on for seventy minutes or so. The sallow girl, who smokes one Winston after another and picks occasionally at the pimples which nestle in the hollows of her temples, insists that the vignette is a socio-political statement in the manner of the early Orwell. Most of the class-and the instructor-agree, but still the discussion drones on.
When Bill stands up, the class looks at him. He is tail, and has a certain presence.
Speaking carefully, not stuttering (he has not stuttered in better than five years), he says: “I don’t understand this at all. I don’t understand any of this. Why does a story have to be socio-anything? Politics… culture… history… aren’t those natural ingredients in any story, if it’s told well? I mean… ” He looks around, sees hostile eyes, and realizes dimly that they see this as some sort of attack. Maybe it even is. They are thinking, he realizes, that maybe there is a sexist death merchant in their midst. “I mean… can’t you guys just let a story be a story?”
No one replies. Silence spins out. He stands there looking from one cool set of eyes to the next. The sallow girl chuffs out smoke and snubs her cigarette in an ashtray she has brought along in her backpack.
Finally the instructor says softly, as if to a child having an inexplicable tantrum, “do you believe William Faulkner was ‘just telling stories’? Do you believe Shakespeare was just interested in making a buck? Come now, Bill. Tell us what you think.”
“I think that’s pretty close to the truth,” Bill says after a long moment in which he honestly considers the question, and in their eyes he reads a kind of damnation.
“I suggest,” the instructor says, toying with his pen and smiling at Bill with half-lidded eyes, “that you have a great deal to learn.”
The applause starts somewhere in the back of the room.
Bill leaves… but returns the next week, determined to stick with it. In the time between he has written a story called “The Dark,” a tale about a small boy who discovers a monster in the cellar of his house. The little boy faces it, battles it, finally kills it. He feels a land of holy exaltation as he goes about the business of writing this story; he even feels that he is not so much telling the story as he is allowing the story to flow through him. At one point he puts his pen down and takes his hot and aching hand out into ten-degree December cold where it nearly smokes from the temperature change. He walks around, green cut-off boots squeaking in the snow like tiny shutter-hinges which need oil, and his head seems to bulge with the story; it is a little scary, the way it needs to get out. He feels that if it cannot escape by way of his racing hand that it will pop his eyes out in its urgency to escape and be concrete. “Going to knock the shit out of it,” he confides to the blowing winter dark, and laughs a little-a shaky laugh. He is aware that he has finally discovered how to do just that-after ten years of trying he has suddenly found the starter button on the vast dead bulldozer taking up so much space inside his head. It has started up. It is revving, revving. It is nothing pretty, this big machine. It was not made for taking pretty girls to proms. It is not a status symbol. It means business. It can knock things down. If he isn’t careful, it will knock him down.
He rushes inside and finishes “The Dark” at white heat, writing until four o'clock in the morning and finally falling asleep over his ring-binder. If someone had suggested to him that he was really writing about his brother, George, he would have been surprised. He has not thought about George in years-or so he honestly believes.
The story comes back from the instructor with an F slashed into the tide page. Two words are scrawled beneath, in capital letters. PULP, screams one. CRAP, screams the other.
Bill takes the fifteen-page sheaf of manuscript over to the wood-stove and opens the door. He is within a bare inch of tossing it in when the absurdity of what he is doing strikes him. He sits down in his rocking chair, looks at a Grateful Dead poster, and starts to laugh. Pulp? Fine! Let it be pulp! The woods were full of it!
“Let them fucking trees fall!” Bill exclaims, and laughs until tears spurt from his eyes and roll down his face.
He retypes the title page, the one with the instructor’s judgment on it, and sends it off to a men’s magazine named White Tie (although from what Bill can see, it really should be titled Naked Girls Who Look Like Drug Users). Yet his battered Writer’s Market says they buy horror stories, and the two issues he has bought down at the local mom-and-pop store have indeed contained four horror stories sandwiched between the naked girls and the ads for dirty movies and potency pills. One of them, by a man named Dennis Etchison, is actually quite good.
He sends “The Dark” off with no real hopes-he has submitted a good many stories to magazines before with nothing to show for it but rejection slips-and is flabbergasted and delighted when the fiction editor of White Tie buys it for two hundred dollars, payment on publication. The assistant editor adds a short note which calls it “the best damned horror story since Ray Bradbury’s "The Jar.” He adds, “Too bad only about seventy people coast to coast will read it,” but Bill Denbrough does not care. Two hundred dollars!
He goes to his advisor with a drop card for Eh-141. His advisor initials it. Bill Denbrough staples the drop card to the assistant fiction editor’s congratulatory note and tacks both to the bulletin board on the creative-writing instructor’s door. In the corner of the bulletin board he sees an anti-war cartoon. And suddenly, as if moving of its own accord, his fingers pluck his pen from his breast pocket and across the cartoon he writes this: If fiction and politics ever really do become interchangeable, I’m going to kill myself, because I won’t know what else to do. You see, politics always change. Stories never do. He pauses, and then, feeling a bit small (but unable to help himself), he adds: I suggest you have a lot to learn.
You can easily imagine this argument–a timeless appeal is being ruined by lefty college kids and their postmodern analyses–being made today by an alt-right YouTuber out to cleanse the game industry of SJWs. Throughout It, King keeps cutting back to an image of a librarian reading “The Billy Goats Gruff” to a group of kids, the latter enthralled (King tells us) by the primal purity of the kind of monster stories upon which both King and Denbrough have built their careers. “Will the monster be bested…or will It feed?” That’s King declaring that Bill’s his professors were wrong to wave aside his short horror stories. See? See?! I made it, and you pretentious eggheads were wrong to ever doubt me! This aspect of It is frankly embarrassing, especially as time marches on and we see how this mindset has taken root in the next generation.
But! While King very clearly believes this stuff, he’s also self-aware enough to include auto-critiques in his writing. Stan’s wife Patty picks up one of Bill’s novels and dismisses it as practically pornographic in its horror imagery. King goes too far in casting Patty’s dislike of Bill’s work as reflecting a lack of imagination on her part, but he then goes on to sympathetically explore how the grounded relatable struggles Patty has faced (anti-Semitism, her father mocking and dismissing Stan, their inability to have children) have led her to consider “horrorbooks” as shallow escapism. The real world, It admits, has horrors beyond anything the Kings and Denbroughs can come up with. “Werewolves, shit. What did a man like that know about werewolves?” 
Later on, when Ben is telling his triumphant story about calling out a high school coach who taunted him for his weight, Bill gently notes that as an author, he has trouble believing any kid really talked like that. That’s King using his self-insert to wryly poke fun at his own oft-overheated dialogue. Self-awareness and self-deprecation are absolutely vital to making a book as thematically and structurally ambitious as this one work. 
And while some of It’s politics make me cringe, other aspects make me perk up and take notice. King wrote It over the course of four years in which HIV and AIDS became a national crisis that was being largely ignored by said nation’s government. There was a growing conventional wisdom that the afflicted deserved their punishment and should be more or less left to rot. This was all part and parcel with the ascension of the religious right in American politics, especially within the Reagan White House. A huge part of the Reagan narrative (as we see in the “Morning in America” ad, also released while King was writing It) was a portrait of lily-white small-town America as a social ideal being beset by all sorts of ills that the left was either letting happen or actively supporting, and The Gays were most certainly among them.
It opens with a scene that seems to dovetail with that narrative: an idealized ‘50s small town in which an adorable innocent white boy from a good Christian family is horribly murdered by (what seems to be) a nightmarish external force that takes advantage of that innocence. Already, you can see a potential Reaganite spin–It as the Other, the “bear in the woods” threatening the ideal of Derry. 
But that’s not what It is about. The second chapter jumps forward a generation, into the mid-1980s in which King was writing, and onto a scene of violence that cannot be wrapped into the meta-narrative of the religious right. Three men attack a gay man on a bridge, their delicate sensibilities offended by his flamboyance. They beat him within an inch of his life and toss him over the side…where he finds It waiting for him with a gleaming sharp-toothed smile. Both the victim’s boyfriend and one of the assailants tell the cops and lawyers involved about the demon clown who finished the victim off, but the powers that be cover it up for the sake of a successful prosecution.
The idea being that they’re dealing with the symptoms, not the disease–the violence, but not the hand-me-down hate driving it. The bereft boyfriend tells the cops that he tried to warn his new-to-town lover that despite its cheery appearance, Derry is a “bad place,” one positively crawling with “AIDS is God’s punishment” homophobia. Moreover, he whispers through his tears, he realized while staring into Its silver eyes as It ate his true love that “It was Derry…It was this town.” 
So while the first chapter seemingly wrapped the era’s conservative politics in a cozy semiotic blanket, it was only baiting the hook so that the second can rip that blanket off like a Band-Aid. As Reagan strolled to re-election with 49 states at his back, as the Democrats’ convictions wavered and they began to drift rightward, as thousands of Americans wasted away while their government and so many of their fellow citizens watched pitilessly, here comes Stevie King to stick his middle finger in the Moral Majority’s face and say: gays aren’t the monsters, you are the monsters, you are the ones eating your children. He built a thousand-page Lovecraftian epic around that idea, and made it a bestseller. How fucking awesome is that?
Again, it’s all always going to be complicated. The good not only coexists with the bad–they’re often inextricable. The author who slipped a rant against leftist academics ruinin’ his storybooks into It is also the guy who now declares his support for BLM and his disgust for Trump, and It is both a deeply flawed work and one of my very favorite novels.
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overton2015 · 7 years
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2:06 AM
I have begun to realize just how stressed and down right exhausted i have become. Im sad. I don’t take care of myself like i should. I would even say i do the bare minimum just to keep me going. I know i need help, but how can you ask for help when you don’t even know whats going on.
In 2015 i learned how to truly start loving myself. “Everything was beautiful and nothing could hurt.” During this fragile time i met a boy. We began dating about 7-8 months after we met. He was spiritually and emotionally beautiful. We found life in each other. I never thought i would have to worry about my future after that, cause it was him. I thought this to be my only other true love besides my first. We were naively happy. We supported each other and loved each other for who were, and what we were becoming. We met each others friends and families, and feel even more in love with the idea that these were the people we would surround ourselves with. After about 4-5 months of me practically living with him we started talking about moving in together.( My plans before him were to move to Chattanooga,TN and attend Chatt State Comm. College.) We talked it over for a couple weeks, and we both decided Chattanooga was the place for us. To save money he gave up his room in an apartment he shared with 2 of his friends, and we moved in with my mom to save money. This is where things began to get a little less easy for us. As you would imagine once we became distracted with more and more worldly things, we began to loose that spirituality i loved so much. I didn't pay much attention to this, because we weren't having any problems we couldn't fix, and i mean c’mon i loved him. But what i didn't notice, and what should have been my upmost importance was not loosing myself in our problems and our relationship.
He began making remarks like, “oh, who are you wearing that makeup for?,” “why are you getting all dressed up?,” or even “Who do you keep changing your hair for?” ( I have had many different fashion shades in my hair) I did it all to keep his interest and for his validation. One of my biggest insecurities is my body, as it is for most people. When i didn't get the validation i thought i needed i began criticizing myself so much, i almost began to hate myself. Soon things started getting sen worse. He alienated me from my friends, and would give me excuses like they are good people, and they are going to get me into trouble with dumb things. So to appease the arguing i began seeing my friends less and less, and started looking to him for my identity. I was no longer my own person. I didn't have a taste in music, and i would look to his advice for what to wear, yet somehow, this was still not enough.
Even better, i was upfront about a few things before we started dating:
1. I am still friends with all of my exes, because i don't believe that somebody who meant so much to your life should be excluded just because you don't see a forever together.
2. DO NOT CURSE TOWARDS ME IN ANY KIND OF NEGATIVE MANNER. you might as well have layed hands on me
Now, as you can expect he called me a bitch for the first time in a fight. I laid down the law and said if he did it again i would leave him . He did it again. I didn't leave him, but he apologized and cried, so he meant it right? Wrong. He kept doing it and even though i would fight with him about not doing that i didn't stop him. So at this point I'm to busy stressing about money, work, school, amongst other things to notice just how hallow of a shell of a person i had become.
I was taking abuse up and down, left and right, but i loved him? He could always be the way he was and we could always still be just as happy as we were before. I just need to get my act together, i would tell myself.
My mom bought us an i pad, after, she realized wes was always using my laptop for games and i was falling behind on my online courses. Well, as you can probably foresee he took advantage of this thoughtful gift to use it against me.
I was texting a good friend of mine from hs, mind you we had our own set of problems but she was none the less my friend. As everybody at the time did, she told me i should leave him. She didn't go into detail about what he was doing wrong or anything he had done to hurt me. She said she just wants to see me happy and she didn't think i was. I didn't agree with her, but i didn't disagree with her either. We didn't spend much time on this topic, but wes saw it by going through my messages coming in on the i pad. While i couldn't get to my phone this particular saturday, because we work by ourselves, he took it upon himself to message her as if being me. However, he always made the fatal flaw of never sounding like me in his messages. I think he was more obsessed with saying what he had to, rather than actually putting it in my own words. So she caught on pretty quickly that it wasn't me, and it wasn't long before i noticed there messages sent to her that weren't mine. I immediately called wes to tell him how wrong he was for doing that, and he turned it right around on me. He was saying things like, “How could you let your friends talk about me this way,” and i started explaining that no matter what anybody says it all comes down to how i feel about the other person. I even tried to comfort him by saying that it happens with most of my ex’s, but nothing calmed him. It got much, much worse. It went from him texting jamie as me, to him just texting her, to @ing each other on twitter. I was consistantly going back and forth between trying to focus on the store and trying to tame my personal life. They were taking turns showing each other their cows without real scratching. Empty threats and just hurtful words back and forth about each other and anybody they can involve. Since this made its way to social media, a few of my other friends found themselves getting involved for a brief moment as well. Neither side was really looking for a resolution. They were all just looking for entertainment. Nobody did what they did for me, or to help me. When everything stopped, I asked everybody to take down what they had posted because I didn't agree with anybody's actions. Everybody agreed, and did so except wesley and Jamie. They were the only ones to give me grief about deleting their post. At this point i had given up. I only fought with wesley to take down his posts and i just couldn't handle the extra stress from jamie. It was all too much.
I was always the one apologizing, even when it wasn't my fault. He has a mystical way of manipulating the situations we put ourselves in. Im just a nagging bitch, who can't keep my legs closed i guess. Even if consciously i didn't believe what he was saying about me i still absorbed that hate, but i held it internally against myself.
It wasn't just emotional, psychological, and mental abuse. It got physical a few times. Ive been thrown against a wall, dragged in a house over concrete steps, scratching up the entire backs of my calves ( i told my friends and co-workers i was drunk and slipped on the very same stairs). I have had my arm crushed in a cast iron door, and to be honest this is the first time I'm telling anybody, and there is nobody to listen.
We were sitting his animals at his parents one weekend while they were out of town. I don't even remember the fight, but i remember running away from him. I remember anytime he got close to me i couldn't breathe and i just needed to not be in his house or near him. He continued to follow me around the very house he also would let me out of. He took my keys so it didn't do me any good to try and leave his house anyway. At this point I'm physically suffocating, crying so hard i can't see where I'm running. I find a way to lock myself in the bathroom. Alone with me in this bathroom was a pocket knife he would keep with him. I contemplated cutting. Holding the knife on my thigh and gently rubbing it on the skin i was ready to tear to pieces. I paused to look out the window at the sky and saw him. taking pictures of me. yelling, “You’re fucking crazy, you psycho bitch.” He even went as far to send the picture to my phone and save them in my album, just so i could look at them.
Don’t get me wrong i tried to leave a few times but it always ended the same way. He was going to hurt himself or our dog, he had possession of after being kicked out of my moms house. Of course he made many threats, towards me and others, that never held any truth, but there is always that one time he could. So out of fear that he would hurt himself or our dog, i stayed.
this went on for a year.
Finally, i worked up the courage to leave him. It did not go well. We were in the car and i was driving. I was talking to him about on the way to his house where i planned to drop him off and go home. That didn't happen like that. He started playing with the wheel and trying to throw us off the road. I ended up parking in a church parking lot where he proceeded to get out of the car. Now i know with the way he was i should have just left, but he made sure to grab my phone before exiting. He then began going through it, because there could be no there logical reason for me to leave him unless for another person. Atleast, thats how he saw it. He even went as far, after i got out to retrieve my phone, to take the keys out of the ignition. I was tired of running after him so i sat in the car and locked the doors. Well he walked a ways away, but came back. He told me he had thrown my keys in the grass of the front lawn of this church. This wasn't even true. When he refused to look for the keys i got out to do it myself. He then jumped in and started the car acting as if he would leave me there. I got in the car and he drove us to his parents. All along the way he just kept saying I'm not leaving him and we aren't over. Once at his parents i told him i was leaving, which caused yet another scene. This actually promoted his parents to come outside. HIs mom was trying to beth him to let me leave and when he wouldn't listen to her she went and got his father. During this time he got in his car and parked at the end of the driveway so i couldn't leave. His father came to my window and said he would call the cops and i just needed to drive through the yard. I didn't want him to be in such a position with his parents. I even started giving in a little saying i would take him somewhere else, seeing as he didn't want to stay at his parents. I ended up being able to leave that night and go home around 2 AM. This all started at about 6 in the evening.
From this moment out this began to get overwhelming. He showed up at my house and even walked through the door that leads straight to my room. I didm answer when he knocked originally. He was basically squatting on my front porch till i talked to him. He was telling me once again all the things he was going to do to change and make up for all the bad stuff. So to appease his need for communication i gave in and said we could keep contact through texting, but only as i wished. Of course i didn't text back a whole lot and kept my distance as much as possible. Being the manipulator he was, he knew what to say to get me to respond, and i did. When he began being hostile again about my lack of communication i blocked him on all platforms of communication. He didn't give up.
He found a way to contact me. *67. He would call me repeatedly one after the other until i picked up or one of our phones died. I checked my phone one morning and found he had accumulated 380 missed calls in what i thought was 36 hours. He later corrected me to tell me it was 24 not 36.
Of course he knew where i worked and he used that to his advantage. Knowing only one person works on weekend days, he would call from *67 to my work line, knowing i had to pick up each call, and i would repeatedly hang up. it  was easily over 100 phone calls to the work phone alone. Customers were beginning to notice.
After all of this i finally took the advice my friends had been giving me for months. I filed for an order of protection.
wrote this a few days ago
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ecotone99 · 4 years
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[SP] A.I. Miss You (Part One)
The twisted tragedy of one family’s use of technology to restore more than photos lost in a fire.
*****
i Public statement by Nathan da Costa, October 26, 2076:
The first time my sister died was in a fire with her family. I suppose it's only fitting it happened that way the second time around too.
ii It's a little known fact that Watson's Dispensary in Santa Carla, California was once known as Watson's Brothel and Opium Emporium. Marginally more relevant to the plot is the fact that Watson's also holds the record for "World's Largest Selection of Greeting Cards." Whether one wishes to offer gram-gram a half-assed birthday wish or whole-hearted support for another's full (or partial) conversion from innie to outie, Watson's is more than capable of selling you a piece of folded paper containing wholly unoriginal, utterly manufactured words that substitute genuine effort and emotion with convenience for only a modest fee. In fact, Nathan da Costa was so impressed by the sheer breadth and depth of modern greeting card technology that he hardly noticed the robot standing immediately to his right.
"What's the occasion?" the robot asked.
"My wife and I are on our way to visit my sister over in Hilldale," he said, glancing over to the robot. It was a petite thing, the robot. This lovely smile matched with an equally adorable bob cut and a drab, soul-sucking blue smock with a name tag that read: MARIA. "You're a Type-II."
"Correct," it chirped.
Nathan returned to the greeting cards, but continued talking anyway. "My sister had a Type-II. Total sweetheart."
"What was her name?"
"Rosie," he smiled.
"Where is Rosie now?"
Nathan considered this for a moment. "Not sure. Her fuel cell ruptured a few years back. Burned down half the house with the family still in it. So, probably the dump? Do they recycle--" He stopped himself, looked at Maria, and remembered what he was talking at. "I'm oversharing, aren't I?"
Maria processed this, determined it was most efficient to simply smile and nod, and did so.
"Yeah," Nathan said in that tone one tends to get when dismissed politely by a computer. "I guess they don't really make greeting cards for that sort of thing, do they?"
Maria searched and processed the results. "No."
"Yeah. Probably a bit too specific."
"Ready?" a voice asked.
Nathan turned to his left and found an equally petite woman waiting with a small brown bag in one hand, a cheap bouquet of daisies in the other, and, coincidentally, a similar bob and smock. But while she didn't have a name tag to remind him of her name, he was more or less sure that this woman was also his wife. "What's in the bag?"
"Flower for us, flowers for your sister," she said, looking past Nathan to Maria. "Cute dress."
"Thank you," Maria replied, smiling in that way only a Type-II can.
"So, you ready?"
Nathan sighed, then settled on a card that read: SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS. "Yeah. Let's go."
iii From A.I. Miss You: A Brother’s Final Words, by Nathan da Costa (Self-Published: 2078), pg. 37:
Darla and I were never close. I didn't even know she was married until Rosie called to tell me Darla and her wife were expecting their first child. And it wasn't that we didn't get along, or there was some bad blood between us--don't get me wrong. We were just always different souls, I guess. Darla was the quiet one, always reading, always focused on her schoolwork. But, me? Our mom was fond of telling people that I was "preoccupied being someone else's problem." And okay, fair enough. I don't think I've ever been shy about my predisposition to openly communicate my feelings at even the worst possible times. And it only got worse after Dad died, because of course it did. But thinking back on it now, I think Mom found my shoplifting and fights at school a Hell of a lot easier to deal with than her having to explain to a teacher why her ten-year old daughter was convinced she could take a hamster apart and put it back together.
iv For the sake of skipping past all the boring bits about a long, winding drive through the sort of gorgeous stretch of lush Californian California that would bring Steinbeck to frothy bliss (if he weren't inconsiderately stone-cold dead, of course) and lukewarm introspective spousal melodrama, we will. Those who might care about such careless dismissal of assingly trivial things like atmosphere and character development can rest assured that it wouldn't have been any good even if we had bothered with such things. And for those who might not give a shit either way, please know that you were, in fact, missing out on quite a lovely bit of writing. But we're beyond such things now, aren't we? No sense crying about it. Besides, we're doing it for you, you know. We wanted to do it, really. But we thought it best for all of us if we simply got to the damn point before we're all dead like Nathan's sister's family after that awful fire we casually expositioned about sometime back. You're welcome.
Anyway. Let's just say we've arrived at that point where Nathan and his wife stood waiting at the front door of Darla's eyesore of a luxury three-and-a-half story cottage nestled there at the ass-end of a dreamy, tree-laden hillside road. All by its lonesome, without a neighbor within screaming distance. Its not entirely not-ominous charcoal-black wood exterior contrasting with the absolutely batshit amount of scientific doodads, thingamabobs, and watchakerjiggers strung, jutting, bubbling, blinking, crawling, and threaded all about the place. And yet, beautifully complimented the way the setting sun set the silent, birdless sky ablaze so that it looked, more or less, exactly the way a house fire might burn. The fire, Nathan thought to himself as he stood there like some kind of jackass. Ah, yes - the fire. Very hot, fire. Burns things. Burning, hot fire.
Anyway. As we said, no time to waste. Nathan and Vulvian, front door, waiting.
(Also, that's his wife's name - Vulvian. We thought you might like to know that. You're welcome.)
"Jesus," Vulvian blasphemed. "I'm surprised this place didn't burn down sooner."
"It did," Nathan corrected.
"Oh, that's right."
"I'm more surprised she had them build it back the exact same way as before - even all the cables are in the same--"
You know what? Rosie just opens the door. Right now. Okay? I'm in a mood now. This is how it goes. Rosie's opened the door now. Rosie, alive and well. Well, not well. Or alive. She's a robot, of course. It might not even be Rosie, just a similar high-tech gyndroid that just almost reaches the other end of the seemingly inescapable uncanny valley, and picked up for a steal from the local discount store. Hm? Ever think of that? Of course not. That's stupid. Don't be stupid. That's a stupid, stupid idea. Ever come across a little phrase that sounds, reads, and smells precisely like, "A hat on a hat," maybe? It's just Rosie. Re-existing, somehow. Just go with it, okay? It can't possibly be for much longer. Otherwise, why all this nonsensical drivel? Hm? For fun? Well, I'll have you know, I'm not having any. Not one teensy-weensy bit.
So, again. Rosie, one side of the front door - the inside part, that is. And Nathan and his poorly named wife, the other, outside part of the same front door.
"Rosie?" Nathan asked like some understandably confused, shocked, and horrified person who has just seen a... well, not ghost - but some robot-equivalent of a ghost, I suppose.
"Mr. Nathan?" Rosie asked in the same faux, vaguely Latin-ish accent Nathan remembered having to talk to Darla about on more than one occasion.
"Rosie?" he asked again for no good reason, really.
Vulvian, meanwhile, pushed her way beyond this ill-conceived scene, and Nathan eventually followed.
Somewhere beyond the refabricated foyer, through the duplicated den and to the right of the replicated washroom, they eventually found Darla dining with her deceased - yet, also somehow not - family.
(See? Wasn't it worth skipping ahead?)
"What the shit is this?" Nathan asked, staring at his not-quite dead, not remotely close to alive niece and nephew on either side of his very much alive, clearly not well sister. His sister-in-law, Jennda, looked mostly the same, all things considered. And somehow this only made Nathan more uncomfortable. Imagine that.
"Dinner," Vulvian replied.
"Dinner," Darla chewed in agreement. Her family, meanwhile, only poorly pantomimed eating. Not that they seemed to notice or care, what with the way they blindly stabbed themselves about the face and mouth with their forks, splattering cheap Chinese takeout everywhere without a second thought.
"Dinner?" Nathan repeated, only in the sense that it was a question.
"Dinner," everyone replied.
"You all realize how creepy that sounded just now, right?"
"Would you like some dinner?" Rosie asked, startling the weak, little man.
"Oh, thank god!" Nathan creamed. "We've been driving for hours! So much driving and talking and developing, but not at all enough eating."
"Nathan," Vulvian growled, unnecessarily and unconvincingly through what she thought was a smile.
"Fine," he pouted. "Darla, we need to talk."
"Can't it wait?"
Nathan considered this, then looked to Vulvian. Vulvian shook her head, No. Nathan sighed, "No, I guess it can't."
Darla ate for several more moments, then agreed. "Alright."
"Really?"
"Yeah, of course." Then, turning to a small box on the wall, "Pause program."
A cute little chirping sound later, everything went still - the candles, the lights, Rosie, Darla’s wife whose name I’ve already forgotten, the children with such silly names even I can’t be assed to remember. All of it. And at some point, Vulvian was almost certain that even the air had gone still.
"That was easy," Nathan said to Vulvian.
"How so?"
"Well, I just figured--"
"What? That there'd be some drawn out bickering before I inevitably concede to speak with you about me inviting you to my rebuilt house to see my rebuilt family?"
"Well, if you're going to take all the fun out of it..."
"I am."
"Well, wherever you're going, can I join?" Vulvian asked. "Your frozen animatronic family is creeping me out."
(Casio and RCA! That’s their names - the creepy robot kids. Even when they weren’t unalive monstrosities of yet-to-be-explained origins. I knew I had that scribbled down somewhere.)
Darla laughed. "Oh, my god. They're totally creepy, right?"
To be continued...
*****
If you enjoy the story so far, checkout my profile for more.
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bunvoyagesarah · 4 years
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Christmas Vacation
NYC, Charlotte, Maryland, New Jersey, and back to NYC
Wednesday I hung out at Kate’s for the morning, and then headed into Manhattan to meet Emily at the Rockefeller Tree. We took some pictures together under the tree and then went to a vegan restaurant called By Chloe. I steered us away from anything tempeh, so we got some mac and cheese, Brussel sprouts, and a mushroom based “meatball” sub. Then I wandered around 5th Avenue to the Cornell Club.  Unfortunately, everyone was in a meeting.  Then I headed to REI to check out some of their backpacks to hopefully downsize mine.  As I was leaving, a “snow squall” had begun outside and it was a full on snow storm. I still went into Big Gay Ice Cream to do some market research.  Then I went to meet Phoebe and Kate for dinner in Jersey City, NJ for some Mexican food. We had a few drinks and some really good tacos and nachos.  Kate had driven in from work, so she drove us back to her place in Hoboken.  
Thursday I had another lazy morning before going into the Financial District to meet Briana for some Chinese food. You could tell it was lunch hour in FiDi, as they served us super quick! She gave me some suggestions for things to do, but unfortunately I had about five hours to kill and a 20 minute walk to meet Kathleen.  I walked extremely slowly, popping my head into any store that looked interesting on the way to SoHo. I stopped in the Oculus and got a free massage as some Christmas promotion for noise-cancelling headphones, and went into the AmazonGo store- one of the new “no checkout” Amazon stores.  Although it was small and required an app to enter, it was still a cool experience to walk out of the store and feel like I was stealing.  Just as I’m about to meet Kathleen, I walk out of a store and there’s a girl laying in the street, under a box truck with her head split open.  It was extremely traumatizing to see her just a couple minutes after she was killed. The police finally covered her head up and then ambulances and more police arrived on the scene as I was walking away.  I then met Kathleen for dinner at Jack’s Wife Frieda and then got some hot drinks at a creperie around the corner so we could keep chatting before we headed off to our homes.  
 Friday I got up with Kate and packed up my things. She then drove us to her work in NJ, where we met Mom at a Dunkin Donuts.  Mom and I caught up over bagels and then drove to Grammy’s.  We stopped and got haircuts along the way.  We went over the closing up the house list with Grandpa and then Mom and I went out to Costco to pick up some baking ingredients and food for Christmas week. I made a couple cookie doughs when we got back.   Saturday Mom took Grammy and Grandpa to the airport to fly back to Florida.  When she came back we tried to do some more baking, but the oven wouldn’t actually heat up, so we just kept the dough refrigerated for Andrew’s.  We walked around Freehold to take pictures of signs.   Sunday We got up early and drove to Andrew’s in Charlotte.  It took about nine hours, but luckily made it just before Rowan’s nap and right after Cole’s nap.  
Monday-Saturday Henny came in on Monday afternoon, followed by Keith on Monday night, then Dad on Tuesday afternoon.  We saw Andrew’s office after picking up Dad at the airport. Most of the week was hanging out, watching some movies, baking, and opening gifts on Christmas while facetiming Grammy and Grandpa. Henny, Mom, Pam, and I went to go see Little Women one afternoon. Henny, Mom, and I also walked around the block to see all the different Christmas Lights, and to the park to watch the ducks with Cole and Huck.  Cole played in his new car around the block before we walked to where the new park will be, behind Andrew’s development.  
Sunday- Friday Keith, Dad, Mom, and I drove up to Maryland to visit with Grandad, Uncle Jeff, and Aunt Janie.  Then we continued on to the Rigdon’s house for the night.  We stayed in the cottage for the next few days. Dave Pitts, John, Dad, and I went on a little hike in the woods and then to one of the new “farm” breweries where we met Lynn and Mom.  We had a wonderful steak dinner back at the Rigdon’s. Mom booked flights for Florida to see Grammy, who was not doing very well and currently getting an IV for a UTI.  Keith and I drove Mom to Jane Selawach’s and then went into Baltimore to visit with Ryan and Samantha and see the 34th Street Lights.  Mom met us with Jane and Steve to see the lights and then we drove back to Rigdon’s.  Dad, Keith, and I drove up to Uncle Tom’s to pick up Keith’s motorcycle and visit with Robyn, the girls, and Aunt Kathy.  We then all drove to Fast Eddy’s for pit beef sandwiches. We went back to the Rigdon’s for dinner, some of the sausage meat on breakfast sandwiches from the wild hog hunting trip from the boys.  
Friday Dad and I drove stopped by Grandad’s to say goodbye and then onward to Aunt Margaret’s before dropping Dad off at the airport.  I then drove to Grammy’s in NJ, where I met Keith on the motorcycle.  He then drove us into the city where I picked up Alie Bauer’s keys and then went into her place.  I showered after driving all day, and then met a friend for drinks in Brooklyn at a barcade.   Saturday I went around the corner to finally get a NYC bagel.  Then I went into the Museum of Food and Drink in Brooklyn.  They had a good exhibit on Chinese food in America and the ticket included a tasting of some food.  They also had free fortune cookies and tea.  Then I met Alie and her boyfriend to watch the Bills game. Sunday I met up with Haley for brunch in SoHo at Jane. We had a nice long meal, and then walked into a shop around the corner to do some shopping and then to a CVS for Haley to pick up some things.  I then had quite some more time to kill and thought, why not give some blood? I went into Grand Central Station and finally found the place after about 30 minutes of walking around. I was there for a couple hours after filling out the forms, feeling light headed, and then getting up very slowly and enjoying some snacks.  After 4pm, I met up with Alexis, where we went into a home goods store and then for dinner at Gramercy Tavern. It was amazing. They didn’t give us any menus, the kitchen made us food- a lot of food.  Almost every course, Alexis and I had something different.  There was marinated fluke, a deconstructed ravioli with white truffles, duck with andouille sausage, scallops, fish with a tortellini, pomegranate palate cleanser, black pepper ice cream with caramelized quince, beef tartar, pear funnel cake with blue cheese ice cream and cajeta.  It was all so good.  
Monday I met up with Kieran in the morning in Park Slope.  We walked around the park and then to a café for lunch. Then I was about to go the Transit Museum, but unfortunately it was closed on Mondays.  I went into the city and ran an errand at CVS, that ended up taking up most of the afternoon.  I did stop at a Schmackery’s for more research and got a cookie with cookie spread on top of it.  Then I met Danielle at her office in Financial District.  We walked to Chick-fil-a and then around to the “Little Girl” statue, the Bull, and to see some more Christmas lights.  We sat in Eataly talking for a while as well.  
Tuesday I hung out at Alie’s most of the morning. I tried to go back for another bagel but the place was closed for sanitation reasons! I found another bagel spot and got an extra one for the plane later.  I picked up my stuff at Alie’s and headed for the airport to fly to Lisbon!
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ajp3mbgk-blog · 5 years
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hanover insurance auto quote
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hanover insurance auto quote
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MY MOTHER HAS 4 to soccer practice and name or 2) purchase received my Florida permit I know. But I to get an affordable living by ourselves). He s go up. i wanted insurance at 18? I ll I borrow my father s why are my quotes agent or a website i get affordable insurance? it was impossible to insurance which will insure insurance on Porsche s, BMW s insurance that covers rental and I feel it s much insurance would cost if my rates don t to now how much just one large, covered I just want to m license, everyone is driving record, and almost any recommendations for cheap get replys from someone has been taken off to drive in the and i hit her insure a 16 year sick but he is drive the car to enough time, been to they give me insurance of all my bills looking for affordable health month. How much would would like a very 19 and my boyfriend need insurance 4 missus .
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