#also yes peep is a real thing people say and no i will never get tired of hearing someone refer to 'a flock of peeps'

[wren-of-the-woods]

Criminally Underused Bird Nicknames for Jaskier

I love "Lark" as much as the next Witcher fic reader, but there are so many more options we could explore! Here are a few:

Jay / Bluejay This one has excellent potential because 1) jays are incredibly beautiful, colorful, intelligent, and social and 2) their songs are terrible. (Examples here, here, and here.) As such, it'd be perfect for a fond-yet-teasing nickname for Jaskier. Plus, it sounds like the first letter of his name!

Magpie Magpies are corvids like jays, so they're similar in many ways. This one has the extra connotations of collecting shiny things for bonus fun teasing <3

Sparrow Sparrows have lovely songs! They tend not to be very colorful, but they're very cute and the name sounds endearing. I've seen this one used in fic occasionally and I like it!

Sanderling Sanderling is an adorable name for an adorable bird -- they're little sandpipers that run around on beaches! It works perfectly as a reference to Jaskier's role as the Sandpiper and I think it's really sweet.

Peep Peep is a general term for the smallest few species of sandpipers (they're hard to identify at the species level, so calling them peeps is most convenient). It's similar to Sanderling in that it references Jaskier's role as the Sandpiper and sounds adorable!

Bonus: Songbird I have seen this one used in a few fics and I love it every time! It's vague enough to let you imagine whichever bird you want while also sounding very sweet.

Extra options include, but are not limited to: warbler, finch/goldfinch, nightengale, robin, kinglet, titmouse, mockingbird, and starling.

#sanderling is my personal favorite #i'd love to see it catch on #jaskier #the witcher #twn #wren talks #also modifications on lark are fun! like skylark is a good name #but larks are brown and kinda hard to see and i thought jaskier might appreciate being named after some showier/more relevant birds #and also blood origin took it apparently #again no offense to the lark name! i love it a lot! #i just have very many other thoughts #also yes peep is a real thing people say and no i will never get tired of hearing someone refer to 'a flock of peeps' #it's adorable #anyway apologies for the nerdery i wrote this ages ago and only now rediscovered it in the mess that is my drafts #might reblog later with pictures #basically i desperately want to see sanderling and jay used as nicknames for jaskier and i haven't found the right fic to put them in yet

[violentnewmarley]

“can i kiss you?”

Bill kaulitz (2005) x fem!reader <3 (fluff lol)

disclaimer, I’m not a writer at all so im aware this isn’t very good idek how to make themes on here or wtv- I just had the idea and wanted to write about it😖 also I have horrible grammar so im sorry💀

• Basically You had known Tokio hotel for maybe 3 weeks, and had become close friends with each member, but bill stood out to you the most ever since you first met, and you could tell he felt the same about you… you and the boys would often go to a spot by the lake to (smoke + drink) but this time you and bill went alone? 😉😟

You were patiently waiting at the kaulitz twins front door, the sun had already went down and you were waiting for one of the guys to answer the door so you could go to your nightly spot by the lake to drink and smoke together. you rang the door bell a couple of times until bill finally got the door.

he stood alone in the doorway, his tall frame looking down on you. you couldn’t help but smile when you saw him, (he’s just so perfect!? 😋) “where is everyone else?” you asked “I was thinking it could maybe just be you and I? If not that’s okay I can go get-“ you cut him off before he can finish his sentence. “no, yea that’s perfectly fine” you smile up at him. “Do you have the cigarettes?” He asks, “yea I do, in my backpack. I have a few beers too.” He claps his hands and smiles “okay, wicked!” (I feel so cringe help me💀) you see Tom peep over from the other side of the doorway “don’t get too comfortable together” bill rolls his eyes “shut up Tom!” You laugh into your hand at their bickering and quickly grab bills hands leading him out the door.

you start walking into the direction of the spot you guys usally hangout at, he pulls at you turning you around to meet him. he looks down at his shoes anxiously“I was thinking of a different place if you didn’t mind, it could be more personal to us maybe?…” “why not!?!” you say happily, he picks his head up, feeling relieved at your response, (he was practicing saying that to you for like 20 minutes😘🙄)

You guys walk for about 5 minutes, holding hands and just laughing together as you always do, until you stop at a small shed by the woods, slightly intimidating but also cute, bill held the door open for you and you quickly found a place to sit on the ground next to a small flat chest, the shed was lit by a few old lamps hanging from the roof, it was quite clean dispite seeming abandoned and old. Bill sat down across from you leaning against the wood wall as you grabbed things out of your bag and put them on the chest beside you.

“This place is kind of nice to be honest” you exclaimed, lighting the cigarette in your mouth then passing the lighter to bill, “agreed” he quickly lights his cigarette and blows out the smoke. “I saw it one day while me and tom were exploring these woods and I thought you might appreciate it.”

You and bill make small talk and your conversations slowly get more personal and intimate, you start to tell him more about your issues and ideas about relationships, (likely due to the alcohol in your systems😵‍💫) he looks at you in awe as he watches your lips move while you speak. “So yea I guess I just need to except that I’m never gonna find someone who cares or understands in the way I do, yk?” You put your cigarette back in between your lips and inhale. “I understand” his words make u take a deep breath, “I wish more people were like you y/n your so smart, and I agree that being in a relationship without a real connection is worthless too, I would want to spend my time with the right girl instead of wasting it.”

you pick your head up to meet his gaze, his eyes already staring down at you, “bill” you give him a nervous smile, “hm?” “Can I kiss you?” You say to him blushing, his brown eyes looking into yours making you melt, “uhm… yes?!” he gets all giddy for a second until he makes himself calm down, I mean of course you can-“ (he’s trying to act chill but idk if I wrote that clear😭) you lean in closer, “you’re sure?” He smiles and nods his head, “yes!” (Imagine the same expression he made when that interviewer asked how long it takes him to get ready😍)

you get on your knees and put your hand on his neck, giving him a small but sweet kiss, he giggles a little and pulls you in for another kiss with his hand on your chin, kissing you again, and again. You both laugh in between kisses as he pulls you on to his lap leading to you guys messily making out.

he moved his hands up and down your waist whilst you kept yours on his shoulders, you could taste the alcohol on his lips, his cold piercing turning you on when he slide his tongue in your mouth… you swiftly moved your lips to his jaw placing sloppy kisses on his neck, making him lightly whimper. You smiled into his neck as you both started to laugh in disbelief that this was really happening.

You brought your head up back to his and placed your hand on the back of his neck, lips almost touching, “bill” you softly said, looking into his dark eyes. “Yes Liebling?” You blush at his nickname And kiss him quickly.

“I like you a lot”

“I like you too y/n”

My vocabulary isn’t very good and I didn’t proofread very well, but eat up ig🔥 I might write more but also I’m lazy💟 @fishinaband

#pop rock #bill kaulitz #tokio hotel #tom kaulitz #fashion #y2k #y2k goth #pop punk #tokio hotel fanfic #bill kaulitz x reader #kaulitz twins #bill kaulitz fluff #tokio hotel x reader #fanfic #bill kaulitz smut #tokiohotel #billkaulitz #emo girl #gustav schäfer #violentnewmarley

[hooked-on-elvis]

AND THEN, ELVIS MAGIC STRIKES ME... AGAIN ✨

... ON MY BIRTHDAY! 🎂

Okay, so... Sometimes special things cross our ways unexpectedly. I feel we gotta keep ourselves sensitive enough so we can catch the drift or special things can go unnoticed.

I'm gonna share something that just happened to me, so it has nothing biographical about Elvis here -- but in a way it has everything to do with him and his magic pouring onto his fans when we less expect it. ✨

It all started with:

I have a huge Jensen Ackles crush aside from my Elvis Presley burning passion. A few minutes ago I was peeping Jensen's Instagram profile and his last post was one congratulating his wife, Danneel Ackles for her birthday, which is one day previous to mine (March 18) ♥ -- Yes, today, March 19, is my birthday. Okay, very cute but so what?

Then I went to Danneel's Instagram , just because I was already there. Scrolling through her feed, I crossed a funny video of Danneel and Jensen reproducing the video clip of "You Can Call Me Al" by Paul Simon. It was a celebration for their 10th wedding anniversary. 🥹

Danneel and Jensen Ackles video, shared on her Instagram account:

Official music video:

Cute, isn't it? I love those the Ackles, oh god. They are such a match! 🥹🩷

Okay, since I've never heard the song before, and I loved it very much, I decided adding it to my Spotify's playlists (yes, to some of them, not just one... it's a real good track this one!). But... talk about how surprised I was when I learned the title of the album that song was released in is "GRACELAND".

Isn't this odd? I know, some people just don't believe in nothing like magic... to some folks everything is just coincidence but I can't help but think this... this album getting to me today, and the way it happened, was kinda a gift from EP to me, on my birthday. 🥹

It's nothing related to his own work or anything but I'm a huge music lover, huge, and I love discovering new songs, specially if they are from the past. I think somehow, someway, this was kinda a gift to me. "Oh, just because the title of the album?" -- Sure but also the way that album crossed my way so randomly like that.

I gotta say I haven't checked on Jensen Ackles' instagram profile in a long while -- no kidding -- let alone his wife's IG! I'm actually not checking anything on Instagram for some months now. So why today? Why clicking on THIS specific video on Danneel's IG? Why visiting her IG, by the way?

You can say all you want as think as you'd like... call me silly, it's fine... but I'll take it as a special gift from Elvis to me. Songs I didn't know before, an entire new album for me to appreciate on my birthday and forever on. ♥

One can spend its life thinking such thing as magic is BS, that it doesn't exist. One can chose to spend its live life in such uninspired, cold, lame way, sure, but... appreciating the little things and believing every little thing is a miracle and a gift to make me smile a little more it's the way I chose to spend MY life -- I feel it's not even a choice, actually. It's just who I am.

Anyway... I know it's a silly, small little thing but this was so random it surprised me greatly.

The song "Graceland" doesn't directly mentions Elvis by name, but ya' know... Elvis and Graceland are a single thing. Anyway... I just felt like sharing this here because:

1. It really impressed me how randomly this thing happened.

2. The album is amazing, so I recommend you to listen to it.

Listen "Graceland" (1986) by Paul Simon on Spotify:

I have felt Elvis Magic in some occasions before, but today it was so special. I feel he's just being a friend and giving me a record for me to enjoy my day. Awwww. I'll never forget this. 🩷✨🎂🥹

#elvis magic #thank you el #I know it's you #✨ #birthday vibes #birthday girl #turning 29 and still keeping that child innocent in my heart #thank you very much #paul simon #graceland #1986 #Instagram #Youtube

[wisteriagoesvroom]

highlights from ruth buscombe's podcast interview (or, views from a strategist baddie on the track)

listened to the ruth buscombe - the former ferrari, haas and sauber strategist - pitstop podcast over lunch and intended to make only a few notes, but she’s so sharp and funny that i ended up scribbling loads. anyway, enjoy:

ruth’s on gardening leave atm (hasn’t said where she’s going yet. peep the quadrant hoodie tho...). they have long gardening leave because strategists and engineers have so much proprietary info on the cars, they’re usually allowed at least a year to wait it out so they don’t (in theory) bring the intel with them

ruth worked with the FIA to build and simulate where the DRS zones should be because DRS used to be a free for all across the whole track. crazy to imagine huh

on planning for a race vs being reactive: if other teams make a “wrong” strategy in a race or something unexpected like change their number of pitstops, you’d have to be fluid in responding to that or it fucks your race too. she used daniel in shanghai (?) one year as an example

ruth was with seb for his first ferrari win!! legend. there were a number of personnel changes when he arrived and then she was “left holding the strategy baby [for that race] and i was like — okay!” lol. “this was after 2014 a winless season and you don’t want that because you bring shame upon the whole of italy”. aksjsksks.

kinda wild tho. ruth called for the two stop in sepang that resulted in seb’s race win and was 25 when this happened. making the calls like that is so impressive

on vegas: the maths of poker is the same as the maths of strategy (what!!!!! incredible)

she worked with charles and says he’s a very genuine guy, and very talented obviously

they ask her about the lewis ferrari signing and she drops the lore that lewis had actually been in talks with them ages ago, before the merc era. “maybe this [urge] has always been there”.

she was a DIEHARD mclaren fan and went to the ferrari job interview as practice but ended up saying yes to ferrari 💀💀 “ferrari carbed and ice creamed their way to my heart. and they showed me the factory bits you don’t normally see” she’s so real. “i went to ferrari for the interview and then mclaren. like the old grey mclaren not the cool one now. people thought something was wrong with me cus i grew up loving mclaren and then i was going to work at ferrari” AHHAHAKSKSKKSKS

kind of hilariously, she gets motion sickness from watching and monitoring the sim side of the engineering, which is kinda why she switched to the strategy side. the switch happened after one of the races with nando and massa, she proposed unsealing a gearbox on one of the cars, a legal thing, and it got the team a good result so that was history

she thinks max will win based on pace advantage this year cus of the braking evolution this year

2026 is gonna be a huge change in the reg cus of the power unit

all the sacrifice is for race day because it’s such a punishing career travel and time-wise. “if you do not see pressure as a privilege this is probably not the job for you”

on diversity: there’s a study from before liberty media’s takeover that said “the average f1 fan is a 53 year old white male blue collar worker who lived in coventry”. and now there’s a much wider range of fans. and also directly references lewis’s mission 44 as helping to broaden reach.

“drivers are like children. you cannot say who’s your favourite child otherwise you cause like, years of therapy. even if you like one child better than the other you should never say” HELP HAHAH

she troubleshooted a (sauber?) race during one of her first races, there was nothing was loading on the pit wall screens. she’s furiously checking the backend. lights out and they had no numbers. then “the lord sent me an aborted start”. turns out it was a timezone setting issue in the computers. crazy stuff. they ended up going from the back to p6 (!!)

on joining the career ladder as a strategist: there is no strategy school so it’s about learning skills you need to do the job. e.g. doing a maths or computing degree etc. she did the formula student challenge when they build a f1 car

random but: “the first time ross brawn sent me an email i printed it out. best. day. of my life.” 😂

on strategy calls and being able to adapt for different tracks: “as a strategist you do not want to be a one trick pony. you want like. a whole field of ponies”

(the end. loved her perspective. hope we get more in the future!! the whole thing is 100% worth listening to if you have the time.)

#women in motorsport #ruth buscombe #f1 #f1blr

[e-adlirez]

Treasure Seekers 3 Review/Ramble

Welcome to the third and last entry of the Treasure Seekers trilogy :D

"Wait what?" I probably hear you ask. "What about the other four treasures they said the girls would find?"

And to that I say

yeah it do be a bit sad that they never made a book 4

But make no mistake, Legend of the Maze is a doozy of a third book, and I'd say it's almost on-par with book 1 if not surpassing it. Unfortunately there is no free digital copy of the book, so uh if you're down to spend a bit on a digital copy on the E-book site of your choosing or on a physical copy in a bookstore, I salute you for your determination.

As for the rest of you, you're just gonna have to trust me bro :] /j

Ready? Let's go :D (also this is being written by a sleep-deprived E running on hyperfixation juice so if you find any grammar issues feel free to let me know so I can fix them)

The story begins with the Thea Sisters touring the Capelletti House in Verona with their Italian friend/tour guide Sebastiano. Yes, this Verona.

So yeah Colette is fantasizing about Romeo and Juliet as a romantic ship, Vi is trying to kill her Santa by telling her that Romeo and Juliet are fictional characters (which Colette responds to with "oh hush I can dream"), and oop-- loose floorboard-- what's this package under the flo-- LE GAAASSSPPPP LANE LOOORRREEEEE

The girls fangirl about the ABL jumpscare a lil' too loudly and Sebastiano is a lil' confusion, soooooooo the squad goes out for some snacks outside the Capelletti house to explain stuff to Sebastiano

buckle up Sebastiano you're about to get two 300-page books worth of Lane Lore™

While listening to the story, it turns out that Sebastiano may or may not have heard a peep about a legend about a treasure called the Treasure of Eternal Love (adapted Scholastic name is "Treasure of True Love" which ew, snatches the original Italian name instead), which was said to have been owned by Juliet and tho a lotta people are trying to find it, they dunno where it is now. Sounds very Seven Treasures of the World to me :]

How does Sebastiano know a peep about this very obscure legend? Turns out he learned about it from a letter written by his great-grandpappy Jacopo, who was an archaeologist like Aurora :3

So Sebastiano invites the girls to dinner at his place so the girls can look for the letter. Vi don't get too comfy with the house library I know it looks very cool and antique but we got a goal and that is sifting through a lil' box of Jacopo's kept things and find some-- HOLY CRAP LANE LORE™

-

"Hi Jacopo, tysm for helping me with my research on the Treasure of Eternal Love, you're a real g my guy, regards from me and my sister Linda, also tysm for the tour of Verona."

-- ABL

-

The girls tell Sebastiano their findings over a dinner of bigoli al pomodoro, give some extra Lane Lore™ about Jan von Klawitz and Aurora's six sisters, and mention the possibility that Linda knows where the treasure is, which means that Luke is probably after it too, but also Linda might know where the treasure is, which means a lead >:3

First stop: Verona's city hall, where Sebastiano's friend Guido works and is able to help them with finding information about a Linda Lane who may or may not have lived in Verona approximately a century ago. They find a document that says yes, Linda did in fact live in Verona once, and also her address is listed there because legalities, y'know how it is.

So the girls head on over to the address, knock at the door, and are greeted by an old lady, and :0 turns out this old lady (her name is Mia) knew Linda personally.

-

Linda and Mia met when Linda was in her older years and Mia was a smol child. Mia would read for Linda since her eyesight deteriorated in her old age, and they hung out a lot together. When Linda left to return to England, she left the house to Mia, as well as a good chunk of the stuff she had in said house as mementos for Mia to remember her by.

-

Hey guys you wanna see a trick, it's called "the Lane Lore™ %", aka how fast can we get this old lady up to speed with the ABL drama-- /j

Unfortunately Mia doesn't really know anything about the treasures, but she does have this wack painting of a scenery in Japan that just won't align correctly no matter how much finagling you do to it-- oh there was an envelope inside-- LANE LORE™?

So the letter inside the envelope is a letter from Aurora to Linda basically Aurora telling Linda she found the Treasure of Eternal Love, but because Jan is on her tail, she left the treasure in the "House of the Sun" for now. Now, if you tried looking up "house of the sun", you'd get a hotel in Florida, a manga, a former Incan temple that's now a monastery-- you get the picture, it do be a weird detail and probably not it bro, besides Aurora's too much of a gremlin to be that obvious with her riddles.

At least if you're not a Shakespeare nerd like Colette is (the kind that never read past Romeo and Juliet's wedding), because if you were, you'd know that at one point Romeo equates Juliet to the sun rising in the east. Romeo is simping for Juliet, Juliet is the sun, ergo, the Capelletti house.

But uh, thing is we already went to the house and we already know that Aurora came back for the treasure and took it somewhere else. Sooooo might as well see what the last letter says--

"Hi so I'm on the run rn I can't chat for long because Jan is pissed and he wants to find me and force me to reveal the treasure, and I don't think I wanna know how not-kid-friendly this is gonna get if he does find me. Thanks for introducing me to your friend tho :D she's cool and thanks to her help, the treasure is safe and sound in the shade of the cherry trees! I'll come back for it one day, hopefully that day comes soon. Anyway, hugs and kisses, Linda." - ABL

Spoiler alert, despite having a beeg cherry tree on the painting, there was in fact nothing else hiding behind the painting.

LUKE TRANSITION

So Luke is doing Luke things, not touching grass as per usual. Cassidy comes by to give him a lil' souvenir from great-grandpappy Jan von Klawitz's house in London: Jan's old notes. Luke immediately dismisses Cassidy without even so much as a thank you -- Cassidy girlypop you're not scoring that man no matter what you do, he's the Adrien to your Marinette girlie we're only at book 3, you might as well accept your fate -- and Luke takes a lil' peek into Jan's notebook (he also calls his great-grandpappy "Jan", like just "Jan". I dunno maybe I'm just finding it weird because I'm Asian . .) for the goods.

And goods Luke does find, which he proceeds to consume like a goblin. Bit of Klawitz lore here:

-

"Grrr grrr stupid Aurora and her smartass tricks grrrrr who does she think she is grrrrr she beat me to the Treasure of Eternal Love in Verona grrrrrrrrrrrr well at least now I know how she works, I managed to find this friend of hers Jacopo, who definitely knows about the treasure even though he keeps playing stupid like I don't know that he knows Aurora. Something something cherry trees, I ransacked every single cherry tree in Verona and there was literally nothing, wth, Aurora why are you like this" - Jan von Klawitz

-

Luke responds to this seedy lore from his great-grandpappy with "hehehHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHH JAN YOU IDIOT, YOU COULDN'T SEE WHAT WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU BECAUSE YOU UNDERESTIMATED THE LITTLE PILOT GIRL, I ALREADY KNOW WHERE TO LOOK"

Cut back to the girls, and they know where to look next, too

It's Japan, i-it's Japan, y'know Japan's relationship with their sakura/cherry blossoms

Turns out Linda has a friend named Kyoko Bianchi, a Japanese-Italian botanist who was raised in Japan. Since Aurora mentions in her letter that Linda's friend came in clutch, she was obviously referring to Kyoko and now the treasure is in Japan.

So Japan transition :D (based on my personal experience in Japan and also a bit of canon continuity consistency, I headcanon that despite being written in English, this segment of the story mostly had the girls speaking in Japanese, a language they would know how to speak a bit of at least (and apparently Vi is conversational in Japanese so c'mooonnnn).)

The girls land at Narita Airport and take a train to central Tokyo (damn Kumi from Cherry Blossom Adventure you came in clutch possibly teaching the girls how to Japanese subway offscreen because they actually didn't get lost using it on their own :D). Kyoko's hometown was Tokyo, so might as well start searching for her descendants/relatives there. First stop: Shibuya.

Colette is playfully ribbed a bit for having a big-ass bag while everyone else only brought smol backpacks around with them, the luck of the girls not getting lost using the Japanese subway must be balanced out so Paulina's GPS decides now is the right time to be a dick, Shibuya Crossing, and finally they make it to the hotel where Amrita Bianchi, their first Kyoko descendant candidate, is at.

And this is the first time the girls come across the concept of cosplaying, I genuinely don't know how they managed to sidestep it for so long especially since they've been to Japan before for a student exchange, all I can really justify it with is that university has been kicking their a-- RATSUNE MIKU??

Gahd even in 2018 Italy there was no escape from her /j

Anyway so Amrita didn't know Kyoko, so their second candidate is Shinobu Bianchi, a guy living in Shinjuku. They find him-- or more accurately run into him (literally) on his way to work, try to explain things to him but this man is running late, so he invites the girls to follow him to his workplace. They find themselves in a cafe on opening time, customers start filing in before the girls can even tell Shinobu what the whole deal is, soooooo karaoke break :D

Vi c'mon it's not like there's much else to do while waiting for Shinobu-- what're you gonna do, sit there and wait? A-actually y'know what that sounds like something Vi would happily do but c'mooonnn Vi where's your sense-a humor :D

Thirty minutes of singing later, they finally get five minutes to explain to Shinobu what they're looking for and Shinobu says "sorry I dunno Kyoko, I am half-Italian on my dad's side, but my mom has a different Japanese surname"

So the girls Peter William a bit emotionally, Pam goes to what Scholastic is telling me is a kiosk but might as well be a 7/11 based on the banger food Pam got from said kiosk, the girls take a taxi to a Capsule Hotel (judging from the illustration it looks like the Shinjuku Kuyakusho-mae Capsule Hotel), and after a bit of dinner, Peter William into their capsule rooms physically.

The next morning, Nicky goes out for a morning jog as usual (she prolly slept with her capsule open so she wouldn't get claustrophobic), and she finds a gardener tending to a Kyoko Bianchi flower :0 like no joke that's the name, it's a K. bianchi, named after a botanist who founded the Fairy Garden (Disclaimer: neither the K. bianchi nor the Fairy Garden Foundation in Japan exist, they're fictional bits for this fictional story and that's fine :3). Nicky gets the address for the Fairy Garden, runs back to the girls who are having breakfast, and they head on over to the venue.

At the Fairy Garden, the girls meet a gardener named Toshio who happily shows them around, and despite not knowing all the Lane Lore™ (yet), he knows enough to lead them to Kyoko's perfectly preserved office, where the late Bianchi has displayed some pictures from Verona, as well as her furniture and encyclopedia collection.

After a search, they find what was presumably a haiku alluding to Jomon Sugi and the writer's voice being hidden in there, and one jaunt to the record of Jomon Sugi in Kyoko's encyclopedia collection and uhp-- a hidden cassette tape inside the volume!

On one hand, victory, the girls have found a VHS tape that is implied to have a personal recording from Kyoko Bianchi herself, so they're super-close to the treasure now :D

But on the other hand, they found a VHS tape in the year of our lord 2018.

Good news, Toshio knows a buddy who's super tech-savvy, and that's including tech things. Bad news, he's in Kyoto, which is about 445 km/283 miles away from Tokyo.

So the girls quickly take a shinkansen and some bento boxes to Kyoto :D (their wallets are probably sobbing in an 86-USD ticket per person)

At Kyoto, meet Ren, are lowkey surprised that his house is a traditional Japanese house as opposed to a modern flat but hey it's a pleasant surprise, and Ren is able to play the tape for them.

In the tape, Kyoko explains the Treasure of Eternal Love, how it ended up in her hands at the ripe age of 20 through Linda and Aurora, and some Treasure of Eternal Love lore, or rather Ring of Eternal Love lore:

-

Yeah sure Romeo and Juliet were fictional characters, but reality, so it goes, isn't that much different. The Ring of Eternal Love was a courting gift from a suitor to a bachelorette of the Cappelletti household. The suitor and the girl's families had hate boners for each other for a while now, but instead of spiraling into a destructive mess of family feuding and death like in Shakespeare's play, they decided to call off the feud so the two lovers could be happy together. And now the ring, as Kyoko puts it, has been passed down from her to "one who shows love every day, in every way, towards everything that grows from the earth."

-

The girls are happy they got to see the tape and its contents, but they Peter William emotionally once more because well, they're back to square one now-- literally the only clue they have is the thing Kyoko said, and what is the thing Kyoko said? It's cryptic and weird and h a h ? Ren offers to accommodate them for the night, the girls get to sleep on futons for the first time since Secret of the Snow, and the next day they decide to have some downtime vacay-ing in Nijo Castle. A vacay that results in Vi having an epiphany about the riddle and thus who has the ring.

Meanwhile with Luke, he's planning something. Something that's got Cassidy in Japan and putting her master's degrees in Engineering, Chemistry and Computer Sciences to use by assembling a drone (I'm wondering how Cassidy has so little braincells out on the field despite having THREE MASTER'S DEGREES like holy crap--)

Cassidy tries complimenting Luke on the motherboard he sent in from Alaska and-- ew Omar why are you here I thought Luke fired you-- ooh what's that package thing-- oi don't diss on Japanese people being polite, once you see the ruder options you're gonna be pining for that shnit-- wait what how's this drone gonna find the Ring of Eternal Love--

Anyway the girls plus Toshio and Ren take the train back to Tokyo (istg if they took the shinkansen--) and back to the Fairy Garden Foundation, where they talk to the current head gardener: Mr. Murakami.

Mr. Murakami does in fact know Kyoko personally, and after a bit of persuading (it involves a bord like many good things in this world), he decides to bring them to his hometown Nara (which involves a train to Kyoto and then a train from Kyoto to Nara which on the Kodama plus the cheapest option from Kyoto to Nara is-- CHEESUS CRUST 91 USD PER PERSON AND THEY HAVE TO GO BACK TO TOKYO AFTER THIS???)

ANYWAY Mr. Murakami takes them to Nara Park, where he hid the treasure. He brings the girls to it, he checks the hiding place and

It's empty?

Wait, the hiding place is empty?

WAIT WHAT THE HIDING PLACE IS EM--

Off in Alaska, Luke is cackling in his fancy custom-made not-gamer chair.

Mr. Murakami is distraught, most of the girls stay to comfort him while Nicky and Ren scout out the area. In their search, Nicky and Ren find a big broken drone that seems to have crash-landed in the garden, and oop-- LVK logo. It was probably used to spy on Mr. Murakami to snatch the treasure. "DAAAMMMNNNN YOOOUUUU LUUUKKEEEE" Nicky probably would've shrieked at the top of her lungs if she weren't A. in Japan (it's very quiet generally), and B. within earshot of poor Mr. Murakami, who's still recovering from the horrible shock. The girls, Toshio and Ren take the drone to Kyoto while Mr. Murakami stays in Nara with the fam to recover because man, he deserves the break :(

In Ren's house in Kyoto, Paulina and Ren get to work hacking into the drone to snatch its data, and they find that the drone's memory goes as far back as to being in Alaska for some reason. Why would an LVK drone be in Alaska? Unless-- :OOOOO SECRET BASE??

With that lead, the girls depart for Anchorage, Alaska (if I plugged it into Google correctly the price for the flight totals out at a 567-USD one-way flight holy crap girlies have mercy on your wallets-- not including the mini shopping spree for winter clothes Colette was more than happy to drag the girls on). Ren gives Paulina a little flash drive with some written code that could come in clutch in whatever shenanigans they end up in in that secret base of Luke's. Yes Violet as much as I think you're the only person in the group who seems to be concerned for your wallet, ya'll are nawt surviving Alaska with those summer clothes ya'll are wearing.

Behold, a long rest/14-hour timeskip in the form of the last two letters the girls have yet to read from Aurora to Linda. (Well the girls besides Vi, God's sleepiest soldier over here is eeping in the back before the flight's even taken off--)

-

(These are the real letters this time around lmao, if you're confused, Aurora addresses Linda in these letters via her middle name Amaryllis.)

Dear Amaryllis,

I'm very sorry that, because of my job, you are taking on a responsibility that is perhaps too great, and that puts you at risk.

It's all because of the greed of my former professor, a mouse who is incapable of recognizing that beauty should be shared. My dear sister, I have thought about it for a long time, and I have come to the conclusion that the best solution is to take the Treasure of Eternal Love from Verona, where it is not safe... and put you at risk. I am sending you a copy of one of the photos I hold the most dear, in memory of the love that binds us. I hope it will help you make the best decision...

Yours, Aurora

-

Dear Amaryllis,

You wrote me that you are making a decision about the treasure. I agree that the mouse you're planning to entrust it to is worthy of that trust, and I will wait for more news. But you must be careful, even when you write to me, to not mention names or places. We need to watch out, because my former professor is more alert than ever.

It seems that he's building an underground shelter for his riches, designed as a kind of maze to test anyone who manages to enter it...

Professor Jan is clever, and he's always loved riddles, puzzles, and mysteries. I wouldn't wish for any mouse to find themselves in his maze!

Now I must say good-bye, my dear. Sending a big hug.

Yours, Aurora

-

Once the girls land in Anchorage, Alaska, they rent an SUV, pull out Google Maps, read some of the brochures Ren printed out for them just in case, fangirl over a moose (Nicky that's not something to fangirl about have you seen what they're capable of--), and accidental secret tunnel discovery?

Well, accidental secret garbage chute discovery, anyway, since the one thing that allows the girls to not break their ankles when landing is some garbage bags. Food waste garbage bags no less :D Ew :D

Some old aircraft bits are found too which is nice but it's never elaborated on whose old aircraft bits those were so we're moving on to the girls entering Luke's secret headquarters and Nicky trying not to die from claustrophobia :D

CCTVs pose an initial problem, but Ren's flash drive comes in clutch and allows Paulina to freeze the cameras so they can go in undetected (Ren how do you know how to program that is there something you wanna share to the class--). One lengthy labyrinth later, the girls manage to get out of the "we're walking in circles" loop-dee-loop they wound up in and find this little room with a little lit fire pit and an ominous riddle involving the "elements of nature". Pam has the idea of extinguishing the fire pit, and sure enough, inside the fire pit is a key that fits perfectly into the door across the room.

And right after Pam turns the lock on the door, a trapdoor opens up beneath her and she falls into the pit below. It's padded, it's kinda cozy, but it's way too deep for the girls to reach Pam from above without a rope or attempting to risk falling in and getting trapped as well. The girls are very reluctant to leave Pam, but Pam unfortunately only metaphorically slaps some sense into the girls and tells them to go on because they've gone too far to back out now so COMMIT TO THE BIT GODDAMMIT

(you guys like the rhyme-y bits? They're kinda fun to write I do like the rhyme-y bits a bit <:])

And thus the girls minus Pam go through the door to the next room, where there's this swimming pool with a key inside it, which Nicky swims down for, assuming that the trap in the room will only activate once they get the key into the door leading to the next room. Obviously she winds up being very incorrect, as the moment she takes the key from the bottom of the pool, the water starts to drain away until all you got left is a sopping wet Nicky in an empty pool and the key to the next room, which Nicky tosses over to Paulina while asking for her shoes and her dry clothes that they packed. Colette is devastated, devastated I tell you at the idea of leaving Nicky behind, on top of having to leave Pam behind, but Nicky's got faith that the girls will pull through and come back for her; so Colette, Paulina and Violet move on to the next room.

A LOT of walking down a twisting hallway later, the trio make it to the next room (which they use Nicky's key for), and we got four pots with something or other in them, lighting too dim to discern properly what's in the pots, a button sequence puzzle with no margin for error, and a wack riddle. Oh and Paulina's tablet's finally died after possibly uh, 18-ish hours of not charging it. RIP Paulina's tablet, that's gonna be set aside in the corner for the time being.

The pots turn out to have different types of sediment in them, and the wack riddle turns out to be the clue to the correct sequence to input, so the three figure that out fairly quickly and slide down the chute leading to the next room. Except for Paulina, who had to get her tablet from that corner she set it aside in, and wasn't able to make it to the trapdoor-chute in time before it closed on her face, leaving her trapped "forever", as the wack riddle states. The one time you're told to stop holding it, man, unbelievable. I'm never letting go of my tablet again /j

Now Vi and Colette find themselves in an empty room, and they only realize when they get down that Paulina wasn't able to make it out in time. Now this entire time, Colette has been going through it. Of the girls, Colette's been taking the whole leaving-my-friends-behind-for-the-greater-good thing not well at all, and it culminates in an emotional breakdown. Violet comforts her and reassures her that they'll get the ring, they'll pick up the other girls and they'll get outa here soon, but they gotta be brave now for the other girls. (Kinda hard to capture in short and sweet words what the emotion of the scene was but oh well). After a bit of calming down, Colette and Violet look around to find themselves in a... surprisingly simple room? There's a door on the other side of the room from them, and besides that there's literally nothing but thin air.

The two go to the door and move to open it. Yeah this one's surprisingly simple. Just walk on over, pull the door open, walk o-- a gust of wind slammed the door shut . .

Yeah that's right. You ever leave a window in your room open on a windy day and leave your door also open, and the wind going into the room slams the door shut? Yeah, it's that multiplied by uhhhh how much is a vent opposite the door opening up just to blow f%#ken WIMDY-level winds just to slam that metal door shut? However that much multiplies that. The two find themselves in a situation where had all five of them been there to do this puzzle, it would've been far easier; but it is doable with only two people. The plan is one of them wedges themself between the door and the frame and prop it open, while the other crawls under the first person's leg. Transitioning to the second person propping the door open for the first person is gonna be a bit dodgy, but it is doable kinda.

Now Colette has been going through the ringer emotionally, and if you've seen this trope before, you'd know that it'd be a real damn shame if they lost their emotional pillar and had to carry the entire plan on their own, riiiiggghhttt? She's been the handling this situation the worst (emotionally), and it would bring her a belly of the beast to trump all bellies of all beasts and force her to do a The Next Right Thing (hot take: Anna's arc in Frozen 2 was really good), presumably after a lot of sobbing in the corner! It's perfect for angst, and it's perfect for empowerment to see Colette pick herself up and be strong for the girls and save the day!

Which is why Colette doesn't end up being the last one standing :D

Colette was the one who propped the door open for Violet, who crawled through to the other side. The plan was to have Vi switch with Colette so Colette can get through, but one thing they didn't take into account was the fact that the vent would slowly create stronger and stronger winds the longer the door is held open for, so Colette winds up allowing herself to be trapped in the air room so Violet can do the thing. (Oh and the plan was Colette's idea too.)

Heeyyyy Viiiiiiii~ Do you have some cash left over in your wallet? Because I think it's time for you to put your money where your mouth is :DDD

So yeah Violet continues on alone.

Also if you're wondering where Luke is this entire time, he is in fact in his base, still not touching grass and none the wiser about the whole five lil' rat girls sneaking into his base because of the whole frozen cams situation. He does technically notice something's off, but he thinks that the clock in one of the cameras is broken and he ends up complaining about it to Cassidy, haha L. It is also at this point where we learn that the girls have been in Luke's base for a little over three hours at this point :D

Meanwhile, Violet goes down the narrow metal staircase in the hallway outside of the last room and finds herself reminding herself to stay calm but also inside Luke's treasure room, where treasures of all shapes and sizes reside. From whole dinosaur skeletons to ancient Egyptian statues to paintings to suits of armor and-- holy shnit Luke has the Ark of the Covenant in there too o o yeah this guy means business holy crap--

The Ring of Eternal Love is in there too, the lone treasure in the set of seven empty pedestals that Luke was prolly intending for the Seven Treasures of the World. So Vi, clearly not having watched Indiana Jones Raiders of the Lost Ark, attempts to lift the glass case protecting the ring, which sets off the alarms in the treasure rooms, and whoa holy crap there's a robot voice speaking through the alarms? WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN FIFTEEN MINUTES TO SELF-DESTRUCTION

Luke, having the shock of his life, comes down to the treasure room to see what's up, and of course it's one of the five brats who's been getting in the way of his endeavors. Hardly a surprise, really, those five have been a pain in the ass from minute one of Luke looking into the Seven Treasures-- from stopping him getting the Alabaster Garden (he didn't even get to see what it was smh), to duping him with the most audacious of gottems to exist only partially due to his goon's stupidity, and now sneaking into the heart of his base without him, his cameras, or his sensors noticing. Strange how there's only one of them, though.

Just like Aurora Beatrix Lane almost a hundred years prior, this young lady is naive, morally stubborn, and idealistic. She is preaching out about sharing these treasures to all, even when the worth of these treasures comes partly in the luxury of not everyone being able to enjoy them. There is value in that sense of rarity, and it's not like any of the uncaring, ignorant whelps working in the museums look at the pieces that sit before them and realize the true value that they have the privilege of looking at everyday. They wouldn't care about them-- they would do the bare minimum to these unique masterpieces and leave it at that. And this naive brat thinks that they are more loving, more caring to these pieces than Luke is?

But as naive and morally pretentious and... ignorant of time and place this woman is (did she really not hear the self-destruct alarm and is thus willing to babble to her grave?)... she is clearly very intelligent. She was able to affect the base's security system such that she could come in undetected. She was able to get past all four traps without getting trapped herself. It is strange how she is alone here, though. She is usually with four other girls-- ah, that's it. They got trapped, and she left them, so she could get to the treasures on her own. What a show of common sense, that is! She must've seen that the traps were designed such that risking oneself to rescue a trapped person is just not worth it, and that first point already makes her far more intelligent than Cassidy or her buffoons could ever be. It could even be on-par with Luke himself. What if... perhaps....

What if they worked together?

Luke, after a bit of back and forth with Violet, gives Violet an offer to ditch her friends and become his partner. If she accepts they can divide everything between each other in the vault, and together, they'll be able to uncover the treasures of the world and enjoy them all to themselves.

I mean of course Vi turns down the offer in favor of sticking with her friends but y'know what it was worth a shot, Luke, kudos to you for spotting a gemstone instead of covering it with mud and pretending it's not there.

Heavily disappointed by Vi turning him down for the sake of "the power of friendship" (I wish I was kidding)(Scholastic!Vi's (?) words not mine)(I would be incredibly disappointed too), he turns to leave her in the treasure room, and it's only then that Vi realizes she kinda effed up. Luke is the only guy here who knows the base inside-out, and thus would know a way to get the girls out so they can Not Die. And to add insult to injury, Luke made a bomb shelter out of his treasure room, so the entire base may explode and the girls might die, but the treasures are gonna be completely fine. Intact, even. Luke leaves, and the robot voice announces ten minutes before self-destruction.

As soon as she's able to, Vi calls the elevator, juggling anxiety and being able to think under pressure. She figures out that Luke oh so helpfully uses pictograms for his elevator buttons instead of numbers, and presses the button for the control room (the heliport floor is locked by a key). She arrives in the control room, eight minutes before self-destruction.

Just as Vi enters the control room, the cameras get kicked back into action, oh so conveniently showing to Violet a timer ticking down to the big kaboom in real time, and footage of Nicky waiting anxiously in the pool room (and Luke leaving), for extra stakes. One Perception check said "yeah, this is a LOT of buttons, TOO MANY BUTTONS", and the tablet sitting on the desk required a password, so oh god what do

Six minutes before self-destruction and one panic attack later, Vi manages to psyche herself up enough to roll for Investigation. She finds a button for disarming the traps, and that allows the girls to get outa the traps and meet up again in the treasure room. Happy reunions aside tho, four minutes to self-destruction

Turns out the girls (thankfully) didn't know about the self-destruct situation. No need to explain tho because Vi is deadlifting the group braincell like she's never done before. She drags them down to the base's... basement, where a train that was probably used to carry the treasures into the base sits unused and ready for the girls to figure out how to work. Three minutes before self-destruction, no pressure :D

Pam sits at the train's controls, Paulina tries to help but immediately brain crashes at the old-timey controls, thus deciding she'd rather help Nicky get the bars off the rails up ahead. Two minutes left, and Pam figures it out and is ready to-- wait they need electricity-- okay cool Nicky and Paulina are taking care of that, cool

Pam gets the train to start up, Nicky and Paulina manage to hop back into the train, and escape the base's explosion range with about ten seconds to spare :D

After stopping the train in a spot where their braincells could afford to deflate, the girls take a minute or two to breathe y'know, just take a minute to breathe, nibble on some wild raspberries growing in Denali National Park, before figuring out what the hell their next move is.

Vi suggests they tell the authorities about the whole secret-base-under-the-park situation and the treasure room and the stuff inside it (since Luke oh so foolishly gloated to Vi about the treasures being perfectly safe), on top of removing the train so it's not getting up in nature's business. They head back to the car talking about their adventure, get a bit sad that they weren't able to find the Ring of Eternal Love-- and oop just kidding, Vi pocketed it in the treasure room right after Luke dipped :D

So on top of the girls escaping with their lives, not only is Luke gonna lose the Ring of Eternal Love as quickly as he got it, he's also losing his entire treasure vault. Can I get a ripperooni

And that's Legend of the Maze :D

I would say that the hyperfixation-that-consumed-these-girls'-lives-for-a-whole-week energy is very strong in this one in the best way, and the girls' personalities are at their most showcased here. The banter is bantering, the girls' dynamics with each other is very believable here, Vi is carrying the group's braincell the entire time and she looks like she's a bit tired from carrying it but y'know wut she's still willing to carry it because it's honest work and she knows how important it is to have it :3 also her trying to kill Colette's "Romeo and Juliet are so romantic" Santa but failing miserably because Colette unashamedly likes believing in the power of love is hilarious

The main thing I wasn't sure about was.... all the infodumpy bits? The infodump goes a significant bit harder in this book than the previous ones (even more than Compass of the Stars, which is an achievement), and it's Scholastic-style infodumping, so you get the girls calling Luke an "evil mouse" or "selfish mouse" and I'm sitting here like "just call him sewer rat please ya'll had no problems calling him that before please for the love of god use that instead it sounds better--"

Don't even get me started with Amrita Bianchi explaining to the girls what cosplay is like she's the damn Merriam Webster dictionary--

Also the Japan segment with y'know Japanese culture and stuff had the terms localized for some reason??? Like haori became "dark jacket", kimono became "long, elegant Japanese dress", they didn't even mention Ren's hakama (he was wearing a very traditional Japanese look), they felt the need to explain bento boxes as "typical Japanese portable lunch boxes" even though "Japanese lunch box" probably would've gotten the point across just fine and also there was an illustration of the bento boxes, Japanese characters became "logograms" for some reason, and dango became "rice dumplings" which became infinitely more confusing for me because the illustration made it look like takoyaki--

I could go on and on but yeah, there are a lot of these and it felt very infodump-y to me. I'm hoping it's just a translation thing, because the story overall feels pretty solid. Scholastic, what happened to the asterisks? Were they just too much for one page? I feel like you would've been able to squeeze them in just fine to make the reading experience a little smoother,,, just like, so it's an optional thing for the reader to read the mini-infodump of the term if they dunno what it means,,,

Other than that tho I don't think I have much to complain ab--

COUGHS GAGS SCREAMS CRIES WRITHES ON THE FLOOR

(I have the magic-of-friendship-invocation tolerance of an angsty teen I'm sorry :'3)

Scholastic, buddy chum pal buddy chum buddy chum pal,,,,

You could've had Vi say "the only way I got here was thanks to my friends", and it would've been fine and infinitely better-sounding and probably more in-character,,, o<-<

Gahd I hate it when Vi's used as the power of friendship prophet -m-

There's a more minor one as the girls are going back to the car and Vi is telling the girls about the deal Luke offered her, and the girls ask her what she said, and she says "I told him I already had the greatest treasure in the world... true friendship!"

Meanwhile I'm sitting there like "MMMMMGGGGGGHHHHHH 'friends like you' or 'sisters like you' or 'my friendship with you' would've sounded better -m-"

(Also the girls call each other like "friends", so like "you were in fact right, friends", which is like, what happened to "sisters" or "girls" those work perfectly fine and get the girls' close relationship across significantly better than "just friends")

Most of what I'm saying here tho are just nitpicks and probably (hopefully) are just stuff with the English translation-- in all seriousness, the book is pretty good.

Aurora's trail here makes sense and is rather logical, and the interesting thing I find about it is that it feels different from the previous two books' worth of shenanigans. Aurora in this one had far less veers and nation hopping shenanigans, and I feel that it was perhaps intentional. Perhaps to give off finale vibes-- Aurora works far more closely with her sister in this one, and the main thing the girls had to work with was not Aurora's diaries, but the letter she wrote to Linda when they were discussing the Ring of Eternal Love. Something about it feels closer, more intimate, more tragic than the previous ones. I felt the need to put her last to letters in the book verbatim because they were emotional dammit -m- Damn you British Amelia Earhart you've done it again /lhj

Luke's character I think is the strongest here. He gives off in a way the most... normal? Vibes here? He's still not touching grass and muttering to himself ominously a whole lot, but his mindset is nice and easy to wrap your head around here. He literally doesn't care about his goons unless he needs something from them, he is more than happy to overanalyze the crap out of a piece of text if he feels Cassidy didn't look through it thoroughly enough, and he wants what he wants right away, and that includes the things he needs to get the thing he actually wants. He as a character literally observes everything happen from his base in Alaska and backseat gamers the crap out of his goons if he sees something they didn't, or if they fumbled the bag and it was perfectly avoidable had it not been for SM being SM--

Also his blatant disrespect for his great-grandpappy Jan is holy crap haha-- it might just be my cultural background, but when I saw Luke call his great-grandpa "Jan" and then say "you disappoint me, Jan", I was flabbergasted haha, not a criticism I just wanted to mention it because I thought it was funny

I really like the fact that Stan and Max (aka SM) didn't show up at all in this book. It would've been easy to have them show up for regularly scheduled hijinks, but in Luke's mind, none of SM's operations have ever been... up to Luke's standards. Especially with how much of a ruckus they tended to make with their presence, they were more of a liability to Luke than an asset; therefore Luke changing up his strategy to be as hands-off and clean and non-intrusive as possible feels like something he'd do, what with how laser-focused he is on min-maxing efficiency to get what he wants as soon as possible.

Omar still being there despite being "fired" might just be a Scholastic oopsie so I can forgive it, Cassidy is still simping for Luke and trying to impress this man and trying to prove she's at an equal level to him, but every time nah. Just nah. Girlie you think you're on the same level as him, which can't possibly be further than the truth. I haven't seen Miraculous Ladybug, but I'd bet Cassidy has even less of a chance of impressing Luke, than Marinette had a chance at getting Adrien to see her as more than "just a friend" before they finally got together.

Now here's something I've been wanting to ramble about for a while: Violet being left alone instead of Colette. It's actually pretty clever when you think about it: Colette is the closest the girls have to a heart (tho she plays hot potato with Paulina when it comes to that role imo), so she's been the most emotional and the most sentimental of the group this entire time. From daydreaming about Romeo, to wanting to believe in love, to happily picking up a microphone to sing karaoke with the girls, to her strong reactions to having to leave the girls behind one by one for the sake of their mission, Colette was being set up for a moment where she is the one who is left alone. You see it a lot in media: the main character is the most sentimental one and as their friend squad make their way to the Big Bad Evil Guy, the supporting characters are forced to get left behind one by one to either hold the evil minions back or because there's no way for the character to move forward with the MC; so the MC is forced to go through the five stages of grief knowing that their friends trust them to get the job they'd set out to do done. It literally happened in Geronimo's third Kingdom of Fantasy book Amazing Voyage, and in that one Geronimo was the one who desperately didn't want to be alone, but he wound up carrying on alone anyway. You see this kinda thing everywhere.

However, in this bit, it makes total sense that Violet is the one who ends up carrying the last leg of the journey alone instead of Colette. Compared to Colette (and honestly the rest of the girls), Violet is the most level-headed. She's the girls' braincell keeper (in this trilogy), the babysitter holding the leash tied to the four gremlins, the one keeping everyone on track and also making sure that the group's collective ADHD doesn't spiral down as badly as it could possibly be. Whenever the girls make a big move that could affect the whole group, Vi is the one asking if it's a good idea or if it's worth doing, and she's the one thinking ahead enough to say "if x happens instead of y, what then?" You get the idea-- Vi is the most capable of keeping herself level-headed even when she's under all this pressure, and she's good at analyzing and planning on account of her often taking the position of the quiet observer.

With this context, it sort've makes you wonder what was going through Colette's head when she offered to help Violet get out of the air room. Violet and Colette in particular get paired together fairly often, and it's probably because of how well they're able to understand each other-- so with the plan, was Colette volunteering herself to prop the door open out of "it was my idea" courtesy, or was she thinking that maybe Violet would be able to figure things out better and thus needed to get to the other side? She probably was expecting to get to the other side with Vi, but would she have thought far enough ahead to a what-if where that wasn't possible? :3c

And Scholastic and power-of-friendship funkiness aside, Violet did handle the situation well, all things considered. The one bit where she only realized Luke was hers and the girls' only ticket out of there was a bit weird, but it can be chalked up to her not being able to take that into account in the moment because of a mix of stress, sheer bafflement from Luke's deal, and the fact that when put on the spot, observers don't exactly handle taking the driver's seat that well :'D (speaking as an observer myself here)

It makes me wonder a bit if Violet and Luke were meant to be foils of each other, what with how similar they are to each other (both of them being observers and planners who delegate more often than they do the work themselves), yet different enough that the contrast between the two is striking. Said difference being

Violet touches grass. Luke does not :)

Anyway so yeah, that's Treasure Seekers 3, and while it is kinda sad that this is where Treasure Seekers ends, y'know what? It gave a solid show as the last installment in the trilogy. I liked it, I liked the canon compliant blorbo angst, I liked the characters character-ing when the dialogue was letting them breathe :]

And of course, we can't forget

God's sleepiest soldier <3

She deserves that nap after what she went through and you know it--

#geronimo stilton #thea stilton #thea sisters #violet conked out the moment she got into the suv and the girls drove off to plan stuff out. change my mind /j #there's a bit where nicky fangirls upon seeing a moose like she suddenly turned ten and like #she inched closer to the window to see it better but violet was like “hey you're squishing me” #and nicky was like “sorry vi.. i got a bit excited.... y'know how much i love nature” #and vi in this moment where she gave straight-up the most mom vibes #was like “here let's swap seats" #like UEUEUEUEUWAAAAA.... #also like remember the bit where colette wound up lugging a big-ass bag around with her while the girls had smoller backpacks #well surprisingly it backfired but not in the way you'd think #the rest of the girls were basically stuck wearing the same clothes the entire time #meanwhile colette was happily not having to deal with wearing clothes that weren't accumulating sweat from having to walk around #if not y'know because of japan's heat #i wrote this while i was sleep deprived so maybe i missed more than a few things in this review that i wanted to say because forgor #maybe i'll end up editing stuff in here a bit after like #i'm more awake #but yeah <3 #if the infodumpy bits and dialogue quirks are the same in italian i will cry /hj #*psst hey angst lovers wait for my next post i got something for you* #wait for like #when i wake up and hopefully actually get to sleep tonight lmao #before i go consider #alternate scenarios where any of the other girls end up in that same situation with luke #i'll leave those ingredients on the counter. take them and use them however you wish :3 #book rambles #book rant #book review #rambles

[ahollowgrave]

Hiiiii Pigeon!!!! I saw you comment that you like the Locked Tomb series so I had a couple questions to ask...

Are Odette's little skele friends inspired by the vibe of the series?

Does Odette herself have an inspirations that come from the Locked Tomb as well?

What's your favorite character interaction in the series so far? (Mine is the Harrow Bone Soup)

Who is your favorite of the main protags? (I've got a soft spot for Nona, but its barely above the other two.)

That's all for now, hope your day is going well! ^.^

Oh my gosh hello!! The Locked Tomb has been my favorite series since I read the first book a few years ago! I was obsessed I was full in I hadn’t been that into reading since high school when I would read in the back of every class. Never has a book made me ugly cry so hard.

The second book is the main reason I write in 2nd person POV for Odette most of the time (‘:

I’m gonna slap the rest of this under a readmore just in case people don’t want to hear about the books or don’t want things spoiled on accident !! But also this kind of turned into a long explanation of Odette’s whole deal, sorry (mwah).

But! To answer your questions!

1&2:) Yes. Pretty heavily but maybe not obviously? Like. Harrow and Odette would not get a long and Odette as she is does not fit the Necromancer vibes of the ninth house. But I was so enamored by these goth nuns being so out of place and so devoted and Harrow being so!!!!! Ready to ruin her life for her faith because she needed her faith so badly to cope with the grief.

And then the way it just all!!!! gestures.

Odette was always going to be a nun, as a result, and the psychopomp stuff felt right after I’d been playing her for a while. We run into Ashkin/undead several times in the MSQ, side quests, and fates and the like; someone being able to aid these ‘souls’ and return them to the lifestream feels like a role for Odette.

She would maybe make more sense being a nun of Nald’thal but I headcanon that each of the 12 have their own funeral rites. Nald’thal is the judge of all dead, that is his role! But each of the 12 get a say in how their faithful are laid to rest. A psycopomp’s role, traditionally, is not judgement but guidance and love knows no judgement, but she does know guidance.

The moths in her screenshots are souls themselves, flocking to Odette for aid in whatever form that means. Sometimes it means slaying their body so they can rest, sometimes it means cleaning their resting place or returning items stolen by graverobbers, sometimes it means finishing anything unfinished they have left, or solving their death or just finding them and laying them to rest. Each soul needs something different.

The skeletons originally were a metaphor and a call back to that root influence of the Ninth house. With encouragement from friends, though, they’ve become much more ‘real’ in her canon. Serving as her trust and guardians on more dangerous searches. (When None can’t join her but also sometimes with None!)

So you can see it’s a very loose influence, but the 1st book is 100% the reason Odette exists. Death nuns??? Please… What a gift.

I have a Locked Tomb AU with my friend, peep, in which Odette is the Ninth house Cav and Avidia the Third House Reject turned Ninth House Necromancer. The Cav/Necromancer relationship is sooo intense and I love reading into to them too much, as does peep, so it’s very fun for us. Would third house ever send one of their necro to the ninth house? No! Probably not! But Avidia must always be a reluctant ex-pat, and so! (It’s a complicated story but we really like it LMAO takes place far before the first book)

Ahem!

3:) The soup scene is SO good, I reread it a few times because it was just so!!! Amazing. This is such a hard question because so many of the scenes are so good.

Three-Way with God is good. Ianthe’s Arm Scene (SCREAMS!!!) The pool scene from book one is ofc a fav but ugh.

The one I think about the most is from book three and it’s a tie, I think, between tree moments at the very end of the book.

Paul’s (re?)birth and “You can’t take loved away.” and “Why are you not appeased? That is how meat loves meat.”

I can’t wait for Alecto the Ninth, truthfully !!

4:) GOSH! This is hard also!!! Nona is also a favorite of mine and I know she has influenced Odette heavily. She’s just so!!! Nona loves you!!! I hope we get to see some of her again, just glimpses, now that she’s been returned. Sobs into my hands for four days straight.

I think Camilla Hect is one of my favorites and Sex Pal, of course. Which means Paul… Paul… my love I can’t wait to know you.

You didn’t ask this question, but I do think there is a lot of Hect in my alt Prudence. That quiet competence and skill, that devotion, that dry wit.

Thank you so much for this ask and also your patience while I replied to it! I love these books very, very much and I always love to talk about them. Are any of your characters influenced by them @eorzeanflowers?

#answered #about #OOPS THIS WAS LONG SORRY #but to answer the questions Yes

[kehideni]

A big rant about the black dragonflight story:

So... as always i have a hard time figuring out where to start...

Least complicated to most complicated i guess?

Ebyssian: SO many people misunderstand or just flat out not get his POV and point he tries to make. Players end up criticizing him for things that are flat out incorrect, such as "not standing up for Wrathion when Sabellian dissed him as fodder and playing extreme centralism"

None of those are true. Just because he didn't punch Sabellian in the face or didn't scream at him, he chewed Sabellian out in THE way Sabellian would get the message. Ebyssian approached Sabellian right away and told him flat out that Wrathion IS his brother and he better start treating him that way. He is "the middle man" but he is not extremely centric, he speaks politics, he had practice in it, he has to walk on eggshells around his brothers because both of them are extremely egoistical AND are being whispered to. I know in this modern day and age everyone wants things straight out, clean and simple otherwise they start screaming "abuse!!" But my peeps... that's not how humans work, that's not how YOU work.

For an overtly simplified example: imagine you are walking on the street, minding your own buisness and your fly is down, showing your underware but you didn't notice yet.

Which would you rather have a stranger pointing and laughing at you, screaming loudly for everyone to hear that your fly is down

OR

A stranger discreetly pushing your arm, and pointing to your fly then quietly they continue on their own walk.

Telling something is one thing, HOW you communicate it is also important because the message gets lost if you don't chose the correct way.

Ebyssian tried his best to communicate to his brothers that Neltharion was never someone to look up to, something that those two always ignored in favor of having another bigdick contest and had to have an "in your face" wake up call in the Aberrus raid.(Sarkareth's death)

Now onto Sabellian:

Eventhough Sabellian is an older character than Wrathion and Ebyssian (both in terms of lore age and irl creation) he is the least developed. We hardly even know his character, everything he did people took as core personality trait for face value. And in all honesty that's all we can do for now. He is shown being caring, he is shown being competitive, he is shown being insecure. It's really not THAT unbelievable that he would call Wrathion fodder. Yes it hurt even to hear, but you know why it hits hard? Because THAT'S what a strained relationship between siblings look like! I had a very bad relationship with my older brother for YEARS and both of us knew exactly what to say to the other to cause the most pain. Siblings have that kind of power over each other and don't tend to pull punches in these cases. And still keep in mind the whispers that was activly keeping them on edge. I really hope the trio will not get broken up because all 3 of them were -one way or another- alone for so long... they deserve to heal.

Onto the problem child Wrathion.

Look... he is a very gray area for many of us.

Children (when we are talking about simple human children) are not responsible for the things they do. Adults take responsibility because they are supposed to know better, they are supposed to teach the younger and guide them.

Now fantasy dragon children that are just hatched but already have the lexical knowledge of a well read adult are absurd... there's no real life equalent for that, it does not exist. So how am i supposed to treat Wrathion?

A snotty, wild, "no parental figure whatsoever to guide him", misguided KID who had a serious world-politics defining shitbrewery - in which case it's "forgive and for the love of Azeroth LEARN FROM THIS WRATHION" (and for the record only forgive it because he is a fictional character, irl kids would catch these hands if they orchestrated a genocide(which is absurd in the first place))

Or

Calculate his mental age as him having all the responsibility, in which case he is an asshole, caused an attempted genocide, sided with orc-hitler, brought Apocalypse 2.0 and weren't even around to help, AND still did not even apologize and also how dare he call Anduin a friend considering he is indirectly the cause of Varian's death. "But kehideni, he did it to prepare-" oh shut up... There is this saying in hungary that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. But credits where it is due: he did stab a squid.

Look, you can like what and who you like, but first of all don't expect good writing from World of Warcraft. It's been a spagetti of a story for well over 10 years now. Retcons upon retcons, wedged in new characters, villains that are bigger than the previous ones all the time.

And even so, characters are not static. They can say something then do a contradictory thing right after.

Characters in WoW tend to explicitly explain what and why they do BECAUSE so many different kind of people precieve it, it makes for poor writing but everyone should understand it. But they don't. Ebyssian had a cinematic of him explaining he feels ashamed of his ties to Neltharion and wants nothing to do with him and people question why he won't go into Aberrus.

"But it's irresponsible what if Sabellian and Wrathion fall to the Shasowflame."

Yes, what exactly is Ebyssian supposed to do in that case? Uh huh...

Also both Sabellian and Wrathion had a well educated guess on what awaits in there, shadowflame among those things.

"But Ebyssian convinced them to-"

First of all no, he convinced them to help open the door, also both Sabellian and Wrathion were open about wanting to loot the place. "Part of their legacy" or what...

Would i have changed bits of the writing here or there? Yes, absolutely. But as a veteran WoW fan i learned to see what was intended to be the story, rather than what it became through a long ass production line. I do this with GW2 as well.

(This is exactly why i ignore SL exists btw, since there was absolutely no detectable intention there, it was just a clusterfuck)

#world of warcraft #rant #black dragonflight #Ebyssian #Sabellian #Wrathion

[yooniesim]

SO lilsims*e went on a rant about defending early access creators during one of her last lives (4/24 - around 2 hours and 24 minutes) and let me tell you, it was quite something to watch someone completely misrepresent an argument like that.

I didn’t expect much of her, since she's friends with "charging 3 dollars for nipple overlays" littled*ca, but it was so low of her to claim that the people who are against editing a mesh for five minutes and putting it behind a paywall for WEEKS can't make CC of their own, specially since a lot of the people against EA are creators of amazing content here on simblr.

ps: it's also funny to watch perma paywallers get blamed for being the worst (they are), but it's not exclusively perma paywallers that doxx people 🫣🫣🫣

I've never watched her in my life and im not gonna start now lol. idc, she can have her opinion or w/e, she's entitled to that. but I know she upset several ppl with how she spoke to them during this stream (you're not the first person to tell me this) so hopefully she doesn't talk to any of her other followers like that in the future.

anyways, unconnected to her bc idk her, just going off some of the other things you said- it also confuses me when ppl say those critical of early access don't know how to make cc. We do know how to make cc, that's the problem. If we didn't, we wouldn't know about LODs or poly or hat chops or the amount of effort it takes to make an item. The ppl that don't know how to make cc are generally ok with it and I've had a few ppl tell me they became disillusioned with early access once they learned how to make cc. Or people that couldn't afford dlc and then when they finally got it one way or another, realizing that the cc they had was just slightly changed from items they get from ea's packs. I've heard both sentiments a lot.

also, yes, perma-paywallers have now become the boogeymen/scapegoat that creators can point to to make themselves look better whilst at the same time not doing anything to actually help. many early access creators only mentioned the doxxing ring to assure people that they would never do that and they are safe. that was the theme of most of their posts and there hasn't been a peep about it since. And I've never seen any big early access creators talk about their fellows (early access) that have also doxxed people or held any scummy business practices for that matter. Such as manipulating patreon's billing system for their own benefit to charge people twice. They never speak about any of the problems of the system and just go "permas are the real problem" without ever suggesting anything to be done about the permas or even just making their followers more aware of what the problem is or how to stay safe.

I don't really expect this to change. Right now, the sims 4 community is dominated by and built on a system of monetization. This includes not only paywallers of cc but simstubers that are fueled by ad revenue, sponsorships, and stream donations. They are all connected, to each other and to EA. And at the end of the day, it all comes back to money. So it will not change or be dismantled until the Sims 4 dies and they move on to the next thing that makes more money. I haven't found any solution for this other than just not paying them a cent, blocking them preferably, and keeping your own circle of people/followers aware of who isn't safe while just hoping for the best.

#asks #anonymous #ceci speaks #the patreon issue #long post

[bamfbuddie]

I feel like I'm going insane, and I'm not sure why. I usually hate when they hurt the main cast cause I'm a fluff lover. I like the drama for the cases and the patients and the rescues. So this is hitting me hard, and maybe I'm alone in this but I'm hating how much people in the fandom seem to be enjoying the whole 'Buck is in a coma thing'. I haven't read a single fic about it. It's depressing me how much of it there is. Am I alone in this? Cause for me peeps saying he's dead is totally a real fear. Like, one never knows what these shows will pull... I'm freaking out... Tomorrow's episode will kill me if Buck doesn't wake up... >_<"

Hey that’s completely fair, nonnie.

I understand feeling upset and hurt over your comfort character being hurt.

I think it’s less of people enjoying Buck being hurt or in a coma and more getting excited over the fact that this gives the opportunity for us to see everyone close to Buck showing how much they actually care about him because the chance doesn’t arise often.

It’s also giving us an opportunity to go into Buck’s mind and see how he would view a world where he didn’t end up being a firefighter.

And (spoiler alert) a lot of people know that Buck isn’t actually going to die. Like yes, he is currently dead and his heart has stopped beating, but we all know that he doesn’t actually die. We know because Oliver is posting pictures from the finale and he posted pictures from the episodes before that too which is why I think people are just thinking of the opportunities we’ll get from Buck being in a coma and not focusing on the fact that he may not wake up because we know he does.

It’s like reading a fic tagged #angst with happy ending.

Am I making sense? Idk but I really hope this made you feel better and see this whole coma thing from a different perspective.

Please ignore my run on sentences and rambling 😭

Send me your thoughts for tomorrow’s episode.

#buddie #buck x eddie #eddie diaz #evan buckley #9-1-1 #911 fox #9-1-1 6x10 #in a flash #9-1-1 6x11 #in another life #9-1-1 spoilers #gem babbles #gem answers #nonnie #ask me anything

[nozunhinged]

Get to know me tag

I'm a broken record at this point but I looooove love love getting tagged in these thank you @theelast-straw 💝💝💝

Do you make your bed?

Nope, but my partner wants me to *chaos ensues*

What’s your favorite number?

4 (hq peeps iykyk)

What is your job?

Good question I don't really know. I just spend too much time doing it UGH (let's say I work in media production)

If you could go back to school, would you?

Only the last year of high school for one day so I could see all my fav peeps in one place. But getting bullied for being the weird kid all over again? Thanks but no thanks.

Can you parallel park?

Even the biggest ass vans, yes

A job you had that would surprise people?

I was a bartender in a Japanese hostess bar, worked in an apple store, was an academic tutor in uni and uuuh.. oh a tennis coach. Honestly though, my whole career is a fucking surprise

Do you think aliens are real?

I will ignore that question because if I think about it too much I'll get nightmares (just trauma stuff yk)

Can you drive a manual car?

Jup and I also really like doing so

What’s your guilty pleasure?

Everything BL from manga to TV shows. There is nothing in my life that's even remotely related to it (except for being queer AF), I just stumled over it one day and never looked back lol

Tattoos?

Quite a few yeah

Favorite color?

Currently: pink, generally: blue and sage green

Favorite type of music?

Drum'n'Bass and all its subgenres all day every day! If not then Techno from Minimal to Acid. Anything that numbs my brain lol

Do you like puzzles?

I genuinely have no opinion about them

Any phobias?

Trypophobia (getting sick by just typing this) and heights.

Favorite childhood sport?

I basically lived on a tennis court

Do you talk to yourself?

My brain-radio is running 24/7, 365 days a year

What movies do you adore?

There's only one movie I watched like 100 times and still love it which is the original french version of LOL. I was obsessed with it. Other than that I'm not that much of a movie nerd, but in general I love unusual justice tropes like The Equalizer series

Coffee or tea?

Both

First thing you wanted to be growing up?

Tennis coach — did that, 0/10 cannot recommend

I don't just love doing these I also love reading them so I'm tagging @autisticbokutoenthusiast @clowncroccharms @heretherebedork @guzhufuren @negrowhat @blneobin @cagedinreality @monsamborabutterfly @lostemotion @scarefox and ofc anyone who wants to do it!! (No pressure though 🫶)

#get to know me tag #get to know noz #tag game #tagged #about me

[damelucyjo]

Are we finally getting somewhere, guys?? 🤔

Episode 5 - Signs

Things are not going well for our boys 😔

Side note: I love Chris & Arlo 😂

Smack him harder Mae!!

That fucking text was from his dad?! 😂😂 I just learnt way more info than I wanted or needed!

Well said Roy! It’s really pissed me off that Ted has always been about them being a team, but has been happy for them to fully rely on Zava since they got him

Is this a continuity error?? Her hair was down at the match now it’s up?? 🤔 or is this not right after the match?? We’ve never seen her change her hair during the day before, have we??

Not that it matters anyway. Hannah always looks amazing, as we know! I’m glad this dress is making a comeback 🥵

Yes!! Shout at him babes!!

I love all of their reactions to it too. Ted’s tiny little smile is very cute

Beard’s little “I think” 😂 and Hannah trying very hard not to laugh. RELEASE THE BLOOPERS YOU COWARDS!!!!

YYEEEAAAHHHH!!!

Michael Jackson! (Sorry, only people who have watched Stella will understand why I want to say that every time Patrick Baladi is on my screen 🫣🤷🏻‍♀️😂)

This whole interaction is brilliant. Rebecca kind of stumbling over words because she’s thinking of all the signs and as she’s looking at the matchbook John just happens to walk in! And him seeming a little flustered, but happy to tell her he’s moved on and happy. He absolutely doesn’t come here often hoping to run into her 😳😂

Hannah’s face and whole reaction at ‘shite in nining armour’ 🫡 ALL THE AWARDS!!

Keeley having the same photo as Ted for Rebecca is cute

I’m so proud of Keeley!! Also tits. I’m sorry 😔

And that shirt was a choice, Miss Jones!! 😂

Shandy just makes me incredibly angry. And I know that’s the point, but July god 😡

These two have amazing chemistry. I am a RoyKeeley girly, but they cute!

These boys all knowing about She’s All That makes me very happy 😂 just when I think I can’t love them more

Again, Dani I love you 😍

Of course Beard danced in college. I will never be surprised about thing I learn about this man!

ROY FUCKING JOINED IN!!!

I love that they are including Trent

Protective uncle Beard 🥰

Roy, baby, who hurt you 🥺

Is Trent’s cup plastic?! How the fuck didn’t it break when he dropped it 😂

Aww, poor Leslie. Trying to do him job at the expense of his friend 🥺

Rebecca shutting it down straight away by changing the subject. Exactly, girly

The complete shift in Higgins’ whole self is brilliant. And of course he believes in psychics 😂

THE UNIVERSE IS FULLY OF THINGS WE CAN’T EXLAIN, REBECCA 👀

Of course he called his mum to practice that speech 😂

“Hey, Coach” “Hello, Rebecca” 🫠

THEY ARE SO IN SYNC!!!!!!

Yes, thank you Barbara for basically telling Keeley she needs to fire Shandy

I’ll say it every time she’s on screen if I have to; I love Barbara 😍😂 Katy is amazing

This scene really is all over the fucking shop! 😂 and here’s the bitchy female character that is very much real but we don’t get on the show 👍🏼

Fancy as fuck waiting room! And peep all the same women she saw when she left John. Well done on that one

Okay, is this hesitation because she can’t decide who she’d put? Or because she feels like she has no one?? 🤔

It might just be me, but this connection she has with this doctor feels very familiar (if that’s the right word) has he been her doctor forever? My initial reaction was that he knew her dad and I don’t know where that came from 😂

She looks so hopeful 🥹

“Unless it’s animal crossing. That shits fucking soothing” please never change, Isaac 😂

I feel so bad for Jamie that Zava says exactly what he says and they all go crazy for it, but not him. But he is getting a taste of his own medicine so…

I LOVE YOU DANI!! 😂 I love that they’ve giving so much to Cristo this year

Ted going to water then swapping to alcohol when Jake is mentioned 🥺

Barbara loves violence. Why do I love this??

I love the detail of Roy telling all the guys ‘cut, slice, mash’ their opponents, or in Colin’s case ‘cheer until your voice bleeds’, but tells Sam to ‘outclass ‘em’

Proud he didn’t pee on his trousers. I, too, and proud of you Ted 😂

“Henry’s a good kid cause you’re his dad” 🥹

Jade is so unnecessarily rude

I really do love what Nick is doing with Nate this season. It’s so layered and delicious

“Love someone for who they are not what they are” 👀

Sweet Nate, you don’t need her

They can’t function without Zava now. Shocking

I’m sorry, but Leslie’s Meemoji thing looks like my dad and that’s hilarious to me 😂😂

Hannah’s face journey in this scene breaks my heart. Nothing is said and yet every time is said at the same time 🥺 ALL. THE. AWARDS!!!

So twice she’s tried to call Keeley and she’s not answered 🤔 And she’s spent a good chunk of this episode alone 🤔 metaphors me thinks 👀

Keeley, babes, you can’t sleep with her after realising you can’t talk about Roy

Jade & Nate is interesting, but I’m not sure I’m behind it yet

Beard, you could have won that game if you hadn’t let the boys become a team that relied on Zava! (Why does this make me angry ITS NOT REAL!!😂)

A tactic his dad taught him that he passed onto his son 🥹 beautiful

Ted helping himself from a panic attack starting! Proud of you, babes!!

Gina fucking Gershon 😂 great callback!

I’m so happy to see Ted back giving his pep talks. And the boys being so invested in that sign because they’re so invested in Ted and his lessons.

OMG TED SWORE! 🫣😂

The order of these shots is interesting; Nate & Jade, Keeley & Jack, then Roy alone straight after, then Rebecca alone in the car still fixated on that FUCKING MATCHBOOK 🫠

Woah, what an episode! So much to unpack!! Of course I have many thoughts and feelings about most of it.

But it’s Amsterdam next week, guys! I will never be ready 🫡

#Ted Lasso Live Blogging #Ted Lasso

[booksxanime]

Unpopular opinion….but the scene where Jonathan and Will hug technically WAS Will’s coming out to Jonathan scene. Hear me out: Jonathan clearly put two and two together in the van when Mike and Will were talking. He saw the way Will looked at Mike (side note: for a second there, I thought he was peeping Mike’s true feelings since he (Mike) was staring at Will a certain way and Will wasn’t noticing because he wasn’t looking at him while talking but that’s a whole other post) and he clearly noticed him crying and was listening to what he was REALLY saying. Then when they were alone Jonathan said things along the lines of “there is NOTHING you can’t come to me with” and he looked at Will pointedly as he also said “I will always love you NO MATTER WHAT” (I’m not direct quoting but that’s the gist). So I’m thinking that this was the way of showing that Jonathan knows and accepts Will for who he is and Will knows that he knows or at least has suspicions and is accepted by his brother and that’s why he started crying. That’s also why (I’ve heard people say) that Jonathan is always glaring at Mike ‘cause he knows the truth. Is it emotional? YES. Is it a good coming out scene? DEBATABLE. Idk I just wanted to put my thoughts out there because I see a lot of people saying that Will’s sexuality was never brought up or that Jonathan and Will didn’t get to have their coming out acceptance scene when technically they did even though it was still a subtle thing and wasn’t blatantly shouted from the rooftops like people wanted. I still think it’s a decent scene but that’s my unpopular opinion. One can only hope that there is a more open and real conversation with them in season 5 (hopefully with Joyce too) that’s more poignant and straightforward so the stupid straight antis will stfu. But we shall see….

#just my opinion #unpopular opinion #jonathan byers #will byers #byler #stranger things 4 #stranger things volume 2 #stranger things #stranger things spoilers

[ephemeralvalkyrie]

Fuufu Ijou, Koibito Miman - More than a Married Couple, but <not/less than> Lovers.

Let me begin with saying that I hate this show.

Let me follow that up with I also don’t hate this show at all.

I am annoyed at how fast I binged the first 6 episodes faster than running up my credit card at Macy’s on a black friday sale.

This anime falls into that category of shows I want to tell people about when they say that anime is just cartoons and people shouting at one another about the power of friendship and shit. However, it’s also absolutely drenched in most of common anime stereotypes. 

Nosebleeds, Tsunderes, High School Drama, and that loathsome self-deprecating nerd thing that so many shows do. If I hadn’t already seen a clip of it mid episode somewhere else, I probably wouldn’t have bothered to watch it at all. But I did, and now I’m fucking invested in the drama. Damn it, here we go again.

SO, here’s the rundown: 

It’s a take on the high school thing where students pair up in the class and have a pseudo-family for a grade. In older times, I believe it was something like “raising” a bag of flour, or a plant or an egg or an actual doll to simulate the experience of parenthood and married life. Supposedly teaching the value of cooperation and communication. Personally, I never got to experience this project firsthand, but if I’m being completely honest it’s something I’m sad I missed. High school was an awkward time for me, but that’s another story for another time. I digress.

Anyway, so we have the students being paired up and instead of raising a fake kid, they’re just required to share a dormitory together and emulate what it’s like being with and around someone else to share your life with. For a grade.

I mean like, obviously that’s gonna lead to some shit. A bunch of high schoolers shacking up together on the school’s dime? What could possibly go wrong?

I was skeptical that it was going to be “crazy” (read: overused) antics like guys getting caught peeping in on girls showering and getting slapped or some shit like that, but I’ve been pleasantly surprised that this particular trope has been dropped in favor of actual character development.

Instead we are treated to what will eventually become (what I hope) is an intricate allbeit predictable series of relationship triangles and an actual look into the characters true thoughts and feelings. It’s very clearly still an anime, but we do have moments of genuine anger, jealousy, envy, and sorrow

The characters are somewhat objectively generic; Nerd boy Virgin-kun, Main character-haired Gyaru-chan, Nerd boy Virgin-kun’s best friend Otaku-kun, Meek and squeaky Pigtail-chan, Super popular sporty Fuckboy-kun, MC-haired Gyaru-chan’s friends, Sporty-therefore she must be a lesbian-chan, and some other faceless people to clutter up the screen once an a while. 

I mean, yes, all of these characters have other aspects to them, but let’s be real; this is exactly what they want you to see these characters as.

Virgin-kun and Pigtail-chan have been friends since grade school. Virgin-kun obviously has a thing for her, and repeatedly kicks himself for not having the cajones to say anything to her about it. Pigtail-chan likes to pretend she’s not aware of this, but shyly admits to Lesbian-chan that she’s 150% got a thing for him too. Who could’ve possibly guessed that?

Gyaru-chan is literally drooling over Fuckboy-kun’s jockstrap, but Fuckboy-kun doesn’t even know what fucking day it is. But hey, pretty people like pretty people, no surprises there.

Well, for this little class experiment, and I know this may come as a shock to you...but Virgin-kun gets paired up with Gyaru-chan. What?!!? You mean the Nerdboy and the Popular girl are forced to work together? What a fucking plot twist!

Stay with me here, it gets even deeper; Pigtail-chan and Fuckboy-kun get partnered up too! What in the actual fuck is going on here?!?!?! Mind= blown. Amazing. I am figuratively speechless. Never saw that one coming at all.

I have to poke fun at this because you can’t possibly watch anime taking it seriously all the time. They needed a starting point, and by gosh they’ve gone and done it.

Now, onto the parts that actual keep me interested:

Majority of the first 6 episodes centers around the “main” couple of Virgin-kun and Gyaru-chan’s everyday cohabitation. There are of course some predictable slapstick moments, but what I actually enjoy is how the tone is lighthearted but also somewhat serious. They’re aware of the situation they’ve gotten themselves into, and they know it’s important for this project to go well if they have any hope of achieving their shared goals. Surprisingly, Gyaru-chan is the one that pushes things forward, but not like in a commanding way. She decides to give it some real effort and fulfill her duties as a wife, and she ain’t too bad at it either. If anything it’s Virgin-kun that can’t manage to get his shit together. He’s not particularly bad at it either, but he struggles with his own insecurities, repeatedly. Still, for what it’s worth, they’re believable.

And wouldn’t you know it, that’s the problem. 

I should mention that the one caveat of this experiment is that if you keep your score up high enough, you can choose to spouse-swap with another couple of equal standing.

Potential drama? Of course. Why the fuck not.

In the following episodes we’re shown a variety of up and down situations as Gyaru-chan and Virgin-kun’s relationship grows, while things between Pigtail-chan and Fuckboy-kun become rather murky as well.

Virgin-kun and Pigtail-chan share a few somewhat innocent moments, just so we’re clear that there’s still something going on there while Gyaru-chan may or may not be on Fuckboy-kun’s radar at all.

But what is Fuckboy-kun really after? His motives are questionable at best.

Is-she-actually-a-Lesbian-chan has her own issues to deal with but still encourages Pigtail-chan to pursue her dreams and not to give up just cause she doesn’t actually know how to talk to boys any more than Virgin-kun can talk to girls.(but they can talk to each other???)

And Otaku-kun...is clearly just there as cannon fodder and the “i don’t want to make our audience uncomfortable dealing with these awkward situations so I’m gonna say some dumb shit” guy.

So I’ll say it again: I hate this show

and also, I don’t hate this show at all.

I hate this show because it’s fuckin sappy. I get frustrated and throw my pillow at the wall when simple shit could be avoided by actual communication

But I also don’t hate it because I realize that these are all part of the characters development. It’s like watching a B-list horror movie that makes you yell “don’t go into the fucking shed” at the screen like an idiot. It’s not that i like yelling at screens, it’s that the show pulled me into this mess and I’m invested. 

I don’t care if everyone gets their happy ending. I’m fully expecting at least 1 if not all of these characters to end up heartbroken or otherwise emotionally damaged. 

But really, the reason I’m going to keep watching is because they make you care about them...just enough.

...and to be honest, it’s pretty fuckin cute.

#anime #anime review #rant #fuufu ijou koibito miman #more than a couple less than lovers #i wanted to sleep but then I started watching this damn show #i'm obviously a sap

[lunaticus-platina]

I'm only gonna talk about this once in ted tag cuz I don't wanna muck up the tag. Any other stuff related to the whole incident goes to the contedversy 2022 tag. 🚬 Oh almost forgot. Cheers to @verat9c for the awesome tag you go peep.

Hey folks. I've had a long day. I usually get long days. My days are busy. I come home, stretch my joints, try not to let all the trapped screams inside my lungs leak out of its chambers. Or fall into the sweet temptations of substance abuse. I mean coffee. I ain't a smoker and forswore alcohol a year ago. Tho the urge for a cancer stick grows every week. Especially after smth like this.

Only other addiction of mine is simpin. I open tumblr as usual and what do I see? Yeah. I peeked into Twitter all those years ago and said 'Yeah-ap. Not staying a single second longer in this hell.' And booked it. This place? At least it's fun here. But I keep forgetting most of social media's the same. But I gave away all my fucks I had in me some years ago........I'm just high on caffeine.

@tedraimisimp If ya reading this. I know you deleted your blog. I respect your decision. And no, what you did wasn't exactly wrong, you just shared your experience and ranted abit. We all do that. But you forgot, that this is tumblr.

I know you didn't ask but just so you know...that wasn't the best move. Deleting a blog after that post. People are just gonna pile on speculations and things are gonna go conspiracy level real quick. I know how it goes. Seen enough drama in my time. They already say you deleted blog because you felt threatened or some shit. You planted a ping-pong ball sized molehill, and look at em building mountain over it!

Every single social media that I've been on. Exact same pattern. Never fails once. Whether popular and well-known platform, or not. Doesn't matter. There's faintest blood in the water........piranhas gather.

What breaks my goddamned heart is a fan who excitedly prepared for an event and shared their sweet experience with us now deleted their posts over this shit. Do people not think about the consequences of their actions these days? No I ain't bashing tedraimisimp I just said what they did wasn't wrong. It's those who are blowing this outta proportion and making ops uncomfortable.

For those of you who didn't have an actual experience with Ted. Shut your goddamn trap. Fucking shut it. Let the ones who actually were there talk. I need more evidences to hear from both sides to decide what is valid or not, and all the noises are not helping.

Now the ones who posted about their actual, real, positve/negative experiences, not the 'oh someone posted and mentioned this this and this' idiots, are getting uncomfortable. Just shut the fuck up for once and learn to listen.

Someone shared their experience. That's all. Op wanted to rant because they thought this fandom was safe to talk about stuff and their concerns. You are not making it safe. Yes I like Ted Raimi as an actor. No accusing him of things when there is no actual proof is wrong. Stop making him sound like a predator.

You don't know how many people got their lives ruined over false accusations. Over here it's hella common. All I need is an evidence and I'll gladly shove all my words down my throat. It's innocent until proven guilty.

I was personally a victim of witch-hunting style bullying. One person started a rumor, things snowballed into 'That kid is mentally disabled and carries contagious disease. An orphan. They are a virus. Yuck! Hope they die so we don't have to deal with them in our class. They also steal stuffs. A thief. Check your bags!'

I never fully recovered from it. I was called a 'plague'. Reason of bullying was simple. I was a quiet bookworm. Never talked much, not smiling much. They called me a psychopath and jokingly said one day I'll bomb the school. My best friend now had a similar experience. Those who throw accusations have no idea what the fuck they are doing. People commit suicide over that shit. Fucking shut it, christ.

Now if any of you personally had an unpleasant experience with Ted. Sorry to hear that. But thx for sharing. I needed to hear more 'cuz no person is perfect and I wanted to know more flawed side of him too. If he really has a darker side, and if it's serious, it'll be revealed sooner or later. You don't get to call him terrible stuffs just because he follows someone on social media or flirted with people. Watch your language, don't say what you don't mean, although now that I think about it, that motto that I live by don't mean much on internet does it.

God, fuck, gah my social battery is dying. All I wanted was to chill over wholesome stuffs but now I got this. Imma go watch horse feeding or smth cuz this just proves animals are better to deal with than humans. I can't even write fics in this state godhelpme

#ted raimi #why can't people be neutral and fking listen quietly before jumping to conclusions in another dimension #just gonna hope ops the best wishes and thank them for sharing experiences #the contedversy 2022

[punkscowardschampions]

Casey & Janis Pt.7 (Lamerica & Bibi)

Casey: [she could do it in the car while he’s driving as if it’s a taxi and she’s in a film lol, that was my thought of what y’all would probably do because it’s the most chaotic, even though she’s probably parked right by work and could also run in and get changed there because she owns the place]

Janis: [you’re so real for that, no excuse beyond never wanting to get engaged in a convo with any of the other people who work there lol but that is enough for us, paired with the car acrobatics we’re gonna have to do to achieve it]

Casey: [it’ll bring back mems of your many feral antics in cars during the runaway era so you’ll both love that, just try not to crash, boy, as you’re blatantly checking out every sec of said acrobatics whilst also trying to drive, you’re going on a restaurant date not an A&E one, you’re not java]

Janis: [forever being the most distracting passenger of all time, no shame, but eventually crawling into the front seat to sit next to him ‘like you remembered?’ re. This fit]

Casey: [Winnie has just suggested to me telepathically that we should bring back their OG car crash moment as a means to bring Jimothy out of his baby Jac doesn’t exist and I don’t care era but that’s for nearer to her being born and therefore not for rn, put in a pin in it you evil bear, because for rn he’s LOOKING her over very intensely having a little reminisce in his head before doing one of his dramatic slow nods like YES]

Janis: [a good shout though, it fits very well there, agreed Winola you smart lil man; meanwhile we’re here watching your entire reaction like we’ll be quizzed on it later, placing a joking hand on the steering wheel like you need to keep him on the road because his eyes definitely ain’t ‘still fits’ because you aren’t bigger yet but why not be evil and put that in his head too]

Casey: [mhmm, and he’d be her official next to kin and contact person still for things like that because it’s not something peeps think about changing so they’d call him and obvs he’d come, it makes sense on every level but it will be drama even moreso than when we originally did it hence Winnie is buzzing with himself, but ANYWAY, putting his hand over hers on this steering wheel duh and SQUEEZING it because she’s killing him as she intended to, shamelessly STARING at her boobs ofc because they have grown a lil bit already though I’m sure it isn’t noticeable yet to anyone who doesn’t have this blatant kink, then I don’t even need to say that his eyes and hand are both moving to rest on her stomach because again duh, just leaving that hand there as he turns his attention however briefly back to driving]

Janis: [‘you’re so unsubtle’ as we’re 😳 over how you’re looking at and then touching us, shaking our head like oh you and we’re not totally about it]

Casey: [‘what would I start that now for?’ because he has never been subtle even when she was not his to look at or touch like this he was still out here being this shameless about it we all know, and now she is his so he can and will never stop, smirking at her blush which he isn’t looking at rn since he’s paying attention to the road for once but he knows is there nevertheless]

Janis: [‘decorum’ like lol you’re being SO rude right now, knocking his face with a light tap on the chin like don’t smirk at me boy because we’re only getting redder over here]

Casey: [‘dunno what that means’ could be bants, could be he genuinely doesn’t know what that word means, in my head it’s both cos he can guess hence the pisstakeyness but that’s obvs not a word in his vocab ‘soz, like’ for this and the smirk but ofc he’s not remotely sorry for either lol]

Janis: [a mm sort of noise like yeah, I can tell that because never behaved a day in your life and we’re so here for it ‘neither of us are’ ‘cos no need to lie about it]

Casey: [turning to look at her for a sec when she says neither of them are sorry because yeah too true and he’s gotta do a genuine smile about it and bring back the big hearteyes]

Janis: [kissing the spot on his chin you just punched him because so in love with you and unable to sit still in our seat about it currently]

Casey: [‘I love you’ because HARD SAME, he’s full of love rn and if he even starts kissing her anywhere in any way they 10000% will crash, so saying this and turning away to GRIP the steering wheel like his life depends on it is the only option to keep them alive, but in the same breath he can’t resist adjusting her seatbelt for her when she cannot stop moving, such dad energy always]

Janis: [🤏 at him like I am a tiny bit soz I’m making driving this car such a task for you right now but also a little bit more soz you can’t pay me all the attention always ‘I love you more’ in the quietest voice of all time ‘cos currently trying not to breathe let alone move because behaving in the extreme now]

Casey: [‘nearly there’ as quietly like she’s a child doing the whole are we there yet annoying cliche but really he just needs to remind himself and her that they won’t be stuck in this car having to behave for much longer because they both hate it so much, taking her wrist and feeling her pulse how he do]

Janis: [when he’s being so daddy you can’t actually stand it and are tempted to have a proper sulk about it but folding your arms is interrupted by him grabbing your wrist so you’re just !! at him silently]

Casey: [‘unless’ like that’s a full sentence because we all know he’s saying unless you want me to pull this car over rn immediately and do something about the way you’re looking at me so !!]

Janis: [biting our lip and shaking our head slowly how he did not that long ago because no, we gotta keep going, you’re right]

Casey: [running his thumb over her bottom lip very distractingly for a long and lingering moment but do keep on driving because you always do what you’re told]

Janis: [‘nearly there’ the way you repeat something when you’re trying to comfort yourself and need to believe it, sucking his thumb, however briefly as your mouth moved to talk]

Casey: [an intake of breath that’s almost a GASP but he’s not letting it be because we’re trying to be good and get there, therefore driving a little bit faster, not so cray you could get in trouble but just so she knows how much he’s also holding on to that repeated nearly there and needing it to be true]

Janis: [an almost imperceptible nod of approval because could not need to be there more, keeping hold of this hand a little too tightly because any way to hold off from just losing it]

Casey: [get there so he can stop this car and then IMMEDIATELY undo her seatbelt and pull her onto his lap to kiss her like he’s wanted to do that entire time but could not or y’all would crash and die]

Janis: [the most dramatic kissing like it has been years and you thought you’d never get another chance like truly, there’s no way you had to wait that long but that’s just y’alls vibe, the ‘daddy’ that we’re letting out is beyond unholy because we feel like we’ve never meant it more]

Casey: [it has probably been 10 minutes but it feels like y’all had to wait another decade over here, you’re like teenagers but we know why and we’ll always allow it, absolutely does not need to touching her indecently outside of this food place, but he is and does because the d word has been spoken and feels are high and she’s wearing what she’s wearing]

Janis: [attempting to maintain eye contact whilst he kills you to just kill yourself further ‘you’re so handsome’ yet again loving upon his face but not allowing yourself to ruin his hair how you often would]

Casey: [‘it’s for you’ like have it to do whatever you want with, because never going to discourage feral behaviour when he can encourage it, emphasising this by doing a new lovebite somewhere on her where it’s only just peeping out from whatever she’s wearing, so it’s not blatant but it’s there if you’re looking is the vibe]

Janis: [‘for tonight’ like he might be going on a different date tomorrow with someone else, doing the GASP you did not earlier at this lovebite because always going to be here for and urging you to mark us in all the ways]

Casey: [‘forever’ like the most !!! * of all time, thus gotta kiss her fiercely about it as if she’ll go somewhere if he doesn’t]

Janis: [just grinding yourself against him shamelessly, using a hand on the window to steady yourself, biting his lip hard but not quite to bleeding point]

Casey: [excuse us everyone who’s currently getting out of their cars to go and eat or walking past to go about their business for his ridiculous sound in response to all this, he’s not sorry or remotely concerned with y’all but I am]

Janis: [clamp his mouth with yours as if that’s a solution because we’re not stopping, heaven forbid, doing your staring whilst that close vibe too to really get the SHH across as you’re still doing the most to touch him outside his clothes]

Casey: [meanwhile he’s touching her more as if being like okay let’s make it a competition is remotely a solution either, boy you know you’ll only lose, don’t do it]

Janis: [I don’t have much faith in you either but obviously can never turn down a competition so we must, doing our best unphased act here for all of ten seconds, I’m sure]

Casey: [you aren’t baze lads, give it up LOL, but it goes without saying he’s doing the most to turn those 10 secs into a literal second before she’s losing it, again don’t mind them everyone, they can’t be tamed, especially in this era]

Janis: [lmao there is no hiding here we know it, but trying to prove just how unbothered and quiet we can be by moving your hand for you so it’s fully down our pants like see, so cool, so casual but you simply are not so sort of defeated the point but still]

Casey: [taking them off with the implication of just fully intending to leave them behind in this car because they are so unnecessary for this date actually because he knows damn well you aren’t cool or casual and what a way to express it, no fucks given to the mess y’all could now get into with this, best behaviour simply never lasts, and now his only priority is killing her so]

Janis: [grabbing your pants and shoving them in your mouth like there, will be SO quiet now, as if that isn’t entirely unhinged behaviour, showing how blatantly you need something to stop you from making ALL the noise]

Casey: [we all know he LOVES how unhinged she is though so it’ll only add to his enthusiasm here, as if he needed any more encouragement, in contrast to how feral y’all are both being, giving her the softest kiss ever on the top of her head for the good girl vibes] 

Janis: [🥺 having to do your talking for you right now, as well as the blatant way you’re attempting to get him out of his pants but you’re too distracted to fully get there]

Casey: [help her like you helped her with her seatbelt before, same daddy energy, lbr though you need this just as much and you’re as !! about it]

Janis: [taking your pants out of your mouth and using them to coat him in all the drool that you soaked them with ‘please’ in a voice that is barely there at this point]

Casey: [‘please what?’ purely for how his voice sounds asking the question and to make her use hers again because too into how it sounded]

Janis: [breathing so shallowly because we’re overwhelmed with how you just sounded and the endless ways we could ask for this, just continuing to play with you as if debating all these ways in the !! silence ‘love me, daddy’]

Casey: [the way he’s not even intentionally mimicking the exact way she’s breathing they are just that in sync always and feeling the same things so hard rn, STARING at her in the !! silence but almost cutting off her sentence when she says it in his eagerness to do just that, typical him things]

Janis: [the noise that is being strangled out of you with how hard you attempted to keep it in but simply could not when he does shit like that, giving him an aggressive lovebite where he gave you one for the mirroring but also because you need some way to remotely calm yourself]

Casey: [the only acceptable response to any of that is a ‘baby’ that matches the way she said daddy the first time, no notes, neither of them can calm down and are both dying haha]

Janis: [you are right there huns, so funny, at least you’ll have a chance of getting through a course before you need to go again I suppose; just here cuddling him because you need to be squeezing him every which way you can ‘yours forever’]

Casey: [you tried, at least you aren’t going at it outside or inside of whatever this restaurant is because y’all are those bitches and would, some tiny amount of decorum has been found, ridiculous as it is to be proud of you for these antics, try not to squeeze the life out of her when you’re doing this back at her though please, she could barely breathe before as is]

Janis: [wouldn’t be complaining, and we aren’t, the opposite with how we’re sounding and the way we’re putting your seatbelt on for you like we’ve literally trapped you and you can’t leave, not even realising you're also moving more deranged as a result too]

Casey: [bite this seatbelt about how much you love it so you don’t dramatically bite her shoulder or somewhere else because we’re not drawing blood when you’re this pre-date thank you, I’m sure you can and will also choke yourself with it for y’all’s mutual enjoyment and I can’t stop you from doing that so live your best life]

Janis: [just here watching you like a proud parent nbd ‘that’s made you harder, Case, what does that make you?’ pausing our own movements off your body so you have to reach up and thus choke yourself more]

Casey: [a look like you tell me because all he cares about ever is what she thinks and we’re not soz about that ever]

Janis: [‘good answer’ as if any of that was communicated verbally because we just know and you know exactly what we think about you and everything we get up to]

Casey: [the most dramatic nod that turns into the most loving forehead touch because exactly]

Janis: [doing another fave by kissing you as softly as we can whilst being entirely feral in how we’re riding your lap rn ‘I think you’re perfect’ so sincerely between these kisses]

Casey: [‘nah, you know I’m not, and that it’s okay’ because too real to not express yet again how important it is that they don’t have to be perfect ‘I ain’t perfect but you’re still here’]

Janis: [just smiling at him because love you reassuring us whilst mid sesh, you’re too cute sometimes I swear ‘you feel pretty perfect though’ like not soz for it]

Casey: [‘still waiting to feel that for myself’ like yes I know you and your thinking I’m so perfect meaning we have to do penis related arts and crafts, in such an oh you kind of tone but he’s too amused and too loved up, nevermind also being too feral, to really mind atm ‘have to take your word for it’ all the emphasis on word there because really trying to get her to make all the possible unhinged noises ever with what he’s doing]

Janis: [‘not my fault you can’t fuck yourself like that’ with the same kind of affectionate bants because it’s unavoidably the mood right now but we’re also immediately giving you all the words without it remotely being going along with the bit and simply because we gotta]

Casey: [‘who else’s is it I’m not as flexible as you?’ with the bants of we’ve been workout buddies for years and years how dare you not train me for this, but he’s making her do some car acrobatics again just to make the most of how flexible she is and how strong he is, obvs, bringing back all the car hookup mems]

Janis: [‘you wouldn’t need me otherwise’ like yeah, too smart to teach you how to do that, it was a carefully considered plan, thank you v much]

Casey: [a hot lol at her masterplan but ‘I would’ because he needs her for all the reasons and needs to let her know that]

Janis: [‘you would… never leave your room’ like I know you but we’re giving you heart eyes because always love being reassured]

Casey: [‘I’d need to see you sometimes’ not him saying that he wouldn’t be able to fuck himself even in this hypothetical scenario without her to turn him on first, when you’re just that in love and it’s so true]

Janis: [just kissing him so hard because that’s the most romantic thing we’ve ever heard tbh]

Casey: [have a makeout, it’ll keep you both a bit quiet at least, the random passersby are welcome]

Janis: [the only chatting we’re doing is to tell you how much we love you, over and over but still, an improvement]

Casey: [us proud of these deviants again when we have no reason to be, god bless, you know he can’t keep his mouth shut and is therefore joining in with that whenever he isn’t kissing her like his life depends on it]

Janis: [soz not soz you have to stan a drunk in love couple like this]

Casey: [and I do but also hurry up so y’all can get in that bloody restaurant or so help me]

Janis: [tbf honey boo boo, we can leave this here if you wanna ‘cos the vibe is getting to Libi throwing a party in your gaff whilst you guys are out and getting you kicked out so, if you wanna do something else we can because we know you gonna have this dinner and hit the clerb]

Casey: [you’re right because honestly I just want y’all to have a nice time on this date and then the fun time you didn’t get to have on night 1 of him working, so nothing dramatic should happen until the news of the party gets back to you and ruins your good time]

Janis: [thanks, Libi, you flop lmao]

Casey: [is there anything you specifically wanna say happens during the date or the clerb or are you good with it just being a nice vibe?]

Janis: [am annoyed this is so short now lmao but honestly I agree, we can just vibe it was going very well until it was ruined, for sure]

America: u were missed in detention 2day

America: Lucas went psycho, u could of filmed it

Libi: At you? Unfortunately that isn’t enough of a plot twist to make the day’s supercut

America: @ the kid with the crutches in my year, swear that was the only thing stopping it coming 2 blows, 2 weapons on him at all times, not a wise fight to pick

Libi: Typical one for Lucas to pick though, when it isn’t a girl from my year 🚩

America: told you he made a mistake double booking himself when he got you

America: couldn’t get all assault-y like he wanted with me there just ‘cos I couldn’t answer his question about… whatever it is we’re doing atm

Libi: Don’t, the close call is too real, it was already gross as when he used the word “provocative” to describe how I answered his question…

America: ooh la la 

America: never happy, him, if you answer his questions or don’t 💔

Libi: I’ll be happy to leave it at the one detention with him, no offence

America: a tease, I understand, I just lack the subtlety myself

Libi: He shouldn’t be getting worked up by me, that’s very much a him issue, not a me problem, but

Libi: you’re not the only person to ever say it

America: who’s saying that to you? 🤔

America: boys are very bad flirts

Libi: Still, I don’t think they were trying to flirt, just make me feel bad, or themselves better, for my serious lack of interest

America: you do have a boyfriend, isn’t that incel defense 101

America: respect other men, not bitches

Libi: Probably if true, but you’ve heard wrong, I don’t have a boyfriend

America: oh, my bad

America: every1 thinks the deaf kid is your boyfriend

Libi: Well 1. Everyone shouldn’t call him the deaf kid, that’s way more insulting than thinking we’re dating and 2. We aren’t, he’s like my brother and my best friend, nothing else

America: sorry, I don’t know his name, I wasn’t trying to majorly put my foot in it but 🙃

Libi: 3. His name is Bobby, now you know and you won’t have to put up with me having a go again

America: it’s cool, it sounded cunty even if it wasn’t

America: you should tell everyone you’re single, then you wouldn’t be, you’re so pretty

Libi: 😳

Libi: might be a big part of the reason I don’t, selfish as that is to him, I’d rather be single right now

America: the pretty privilege 😏

Libi: You’re pretty too, you can’t call it out if you also have it

America: not as pretty as my sister so its irrelevant

America: i’m not 💔 i get to be a total hoe to compensate

Libi: 👌 my only child privilege I’ll accept

America: i won’t hear any arguments on that 1

America: sisters are a living hell

Libi: 😶

Libi: [but drop some films on the subject as recs, idk but you’re that bitch]

America: homework… Lucas? 

Libi: I wish that was the sort of homework any of them set

America: as I have NO PLANS for tonight 🍿📼 it is

Libi: You’re so welcome then, since I know the feeling and how 💔 it is

America: who pissed on your plans babe?

Libi: It’s a long story, you would feel like I was a teacher, [namedrop one who emotionally overshares because there always is]

America: you can do that 1. No one believes me, even if I wanted to tell your story for you 2. I’ll tell you all about Gaz and his mind control abuse tactics meaning I’m not allowed to leave my room unless I’m on tiptoes

Libi: [Whatever Violette’s nickname is because nobody’s using her name obvs but I haven’t thought of one] could teach you, she used to always walk like that when we were younger 

America: 🩰

America: I’ll ask her but I might also invest in some heavy 🥾🥾

Libi: Yeah, I wouldn’t blame you, by the sounds of Gaz

America: v Lucas vibes but instead of detention he ruins my home life 🥳

Libi: My home is massive, if you ever wanna stay

America: um, duh

America: you can’t be that sweet and be serious though

Libi: The catch is it’s in the middle of nowhere, and there’s more 🐓🐐 living there than people now, but if you’re cool with the longest bus ride of all time, often, it’s alright really

America: awh, i love 🐓

America: people will travel for an empty though, always, just bin off the few living people left 👾👾

Libi: Oh and 🐈 loads and loads, how could I forget that little detail

America: it does sound like you’re flirting with me but that asks the question what the 🐐 means

America: [name/shame your own cats, deffo a cat family, not as many as the cali gaff, of course]

Libi: Least I don’t have to 🤞 you’re not allergic

Libi: but if I was flirting with you I’d say something about how much we have in common, so many of our 🐈 being named after rock stars

America: why my ma wasted her best names on 🐈s is a whole ‘nother debate but you’re right

America: your name is cool, I’ve thought that since you came to China’s bdays when we were little

Libi: Most people think I’m Libby like Elizabeth, but I’m not bothered about correcting them, I think you’re right and my name is cool too

America: when most people’s names are out of the bible, that’ll happen

America: is a bit like mam wanted us to get bullied but 

Libi: Loads of my family would say it builds character, the rest would either be the bullies or quick to sort them out

America: 🤡 loads of character

Libi: It made me laugh when you [something she’s done recently which I won’t commit us to but we know the vibes]

America: 😁 earned me an invite to your party

Libi: I never agreed to no party, it’s not even my birthday ‘til [a weekday that’s coming up soon af]

America: omg its never your actual birthday, psychic or what

Libi: You might be 🔮 but ❌🥳

Libi: if you knew who I lived with, you’d get why not

America: what are you going to do then?

Libi: I have my traditions for the day of, Bobby and I do

Libi: but I don’t know, things between us are complicated

America: you have to celebrate, however complicated things are

Libi: Nobody’s in the celebrating mood

America: you should be, it’s your birthday, you won’t get to repeat it

Libi: They’re every year, it’s alright, hopefully by the next things’ll be less

Libi: shit, to be honest

America: never your 14th though

America: what if you’re waiting until your 18th or your 44th

Libi: Normally I’d be the first person to want to make it count 🎂

Libi: but I don’t have anybody to invite, it would be actually tragic, Samantha Baker in Sixteen Candles level of bad birthday 😬

America: no, no, silly

America: that’s not tragic, that’s when you invite everyone, the best guestlist is no guestlist, after-all

Libi: Is it?

America: 100%

Libi: I’ve heard what happens when people try and have a lowkey party and it’s gatecrashed, nevermind what would if I set out having no guestlist

Libi: there’d be no house standing by the end

America: no, it’s never that bad, people are just dramatic after the fact to try and sound so super cool

Libi: There’ll be an element of that, but there’s the real risk 🐓 are too scared to lay 🥚 ever again, we can’t

Libi: unless it’s somewhere else

America: maybe its foot in mouth o’clock again but i did think you sort of moved around a bit

Libi: I did, I used to live with Bobby more, before, when his brother was married to my aunty but they’re not together anymore

America: so that’s why everything is shit

Libi: Yeah, she cheated, and his brother took it how you would take something like that, so I can’t live there, they’re looking after each other and I’m

Libi: looking after myself

America: we can’t keep having things in common like this, people will talk

America: so basically, Bobby is in a mood with you too, I see, I see

America: well, where does your aunty live now?

Libi: With him, her new boyfriend

America: you wouldn’t mind if their place got a teeny tiny bit trashed then

Libi: They’d deserve it, but they do have the cutest puppy there I’d feel bad for 🤏

America: I don’t think anyones gonna kick it

America: don’t go to school with TOTAL animals

Libi: We could look after him, between us

Libi: he loves me, I’ve already had to loads and he’ll wanna be your best friend too, he’s that sort of dog

America: you’d trust me? 🥺

Libi: You’re the only one who isn’t full time in her classes with [whatever the special needs teacher is called] who [again Violette but this nickname] says is nice to her

Libi: I’d call that worthy of trust

America: she’s fun, and funny

America: and she likes my stories

Libi: She is and she does, and from my own POV you’re the only one who cares it’s my birthday

America: she probably wouldn’t like a party, would she

Libi: I’ll ask, but it might get a bit much, if we’re inviting everyone, they live in a flat it’s gonna be well crowded

America: it wouldn’t be much of a gesture if it just freaks her out, all I was thinking 

America: I can get to work spreading the word

Libi: Why don’t we do something together the day of, us 3, after school? I have to stop holding my breath at some point Bobby might want to

America: 🥤💳🍦🎉🧁

America: I’ll steal Gaz’ card and it’ll be on me

Libi: You don’t have to, I’ve been given some birthday cash early and I’ll have the rest by then

America: okay, I’ll check his wallet just ‘cos

America: the decades old condoms will come in handy anyway

Libi: If they’re that old, maybe just stick to using them as 🎈 to be safe

America: if that’s your bday girl wish, I will accept

Libi: It properly sounds like I’m flirting now, promise I haven’t had any interest in girls yet

America: 🤫 that I’m a total nun too, no one needs to know

Libi: I’m a total party virgin, throwing one like this anyway, I hope nobody works that out immediately 🤓

America: people want what they want from a party, and they’ll all love you for the excuse you’re giving them to celebrate as well as a venue

America: it’s that simple, promise

Libi: Okay, they’re after the high school party montage, I’ll give them it, easy *😎

America: 👑 and sash before you know it

Libi: Fair question, what are we wearing? To commit fully to being that bitch or nah… 

America: we could go on a shopping spree with your birthday funds to decide

Libi: [tell her about all the thrift stores you know that have the best shit because you’re that bitch]

Libi: hands down my favourite kind of montage

America: how many dead grannies clothes can i wear at once 🤔😁

Libi: I don’t know how I’ll not flirt with you then 👒

America: 👵 not 👴 unlucky Lucas

Libi: Please don’t spread the word as far as the staff room, tah very much

America: his invite will get lost in the post, he can jack off to the coming of age novels he reads

Libi: We’ve all seen the battered copy of Lolita he keeps in his desk drawer, he isn’t even a bit niche about it

America: he acts like he’s that cliche but he was actually fuming when I had my 🍭

Libi: He’s scared of you cos he wants girls that have no agency and no clue what it or consent means, which is even more outdated than his misunderstanding of that book

America: you are sounding a bit too like my sister now 🤏

America: i’ve seen the movie though

Libi: Sorry, but there’s a chance she could be right and you can still think having her ‘round you is hell on earth

Libi: I just mean, you know too much about what he’s like to fall for what he’d like to pretend to be

America: oh she just loves an essay, I don’t think any of hers are ‘provocative’ though 🥱

America: I know what you mean, wants his bullshit believed, most do

Libi: I don’t hate an essay, I’d rather film it, obviously, but if we had a decent English teacher I wouldn’t be gutted to have to write them either

America: you’re smart

Libi: I don’t know about that, but I’ve always liked the sound of my own voice 😅 “provocative” or not

America: we can have that in common, I don’t get 😤 when someone else wants a turn on the mic

Libi: When you come over you’ll lose your shit over the music room

America: 🤤 I only stopped having to share one when Zsa finally got herself a flat

Libi: My mum had to share with her sister when she was our age, she hated it too, she used to sleep in there instead most nights

Libi: I like to, but I’m nowhere near as musical

America: you do 📹 too, that’s cool

Libi: Yeah, like her and my dad, they had it in common

Libi: when I was very little I used to think he had a 📹 for an eye, it’s how I remember him, if I do remember

America: my dad was a 🎸

America: I’ve never heard anyone else put it that way before

Libi: Maybe my mum knew him, she was a bit famous, I think she knew everyone

America: I bet, even though your ma was super young, it’s the same scene

Libi: [tell her all about your mum’s musical endeavours because you have so much of it on film and the rest you just know cos everyone would tell you]

Libi: We should have a look for him in the footage, bring a photo so I have a clue who I’m 👀 for

America: I don’t have any but I bet from description I can work it out, if they were

Libi: You’re on 🍿📼

America: and jamming ✌️

Libi: Don’t tell your sister, unless you fancy making her fuming and jealous

America: always

Libi: I can’t believe you remember me from her birthday parties, what a lasting impression

America: you were sort of hard to miss, for lots of reasons

Libi: I wish I was still her and she was still me

America: you can be

Libi: It’s not that simple but 🎂🤞🌠🙏🔮

America: complicated is for the grownups 

America: all we have to do is have fun

Libi: 🎼 to my 👂

America: and I won’t make any special attempt to make sure cute boys show up 🚫💘

Libi: I just don’t know any cute boys, that’s all, if you do, you’re allowed to invite them

America: me either but I know what they look like

America: they’d be more likely to come if you @’d them

Libi: Alright, tell me who to @ 

America: [just start listing off boys from school you think are fit, probably way too old most of y’all like do not girls lmao]

Libi: [idk how the irish school years work and what they are called etc but just know she’s looking these lads up and saying not the ones that are too old and what year she draws the line at, cos a bossy bitch but also you’re not wrong hun]

America: [I feel like Libi and co were maybe 3rd years so America is 2nd? And it goes up to 6th aka 18 year olds so just do not girls]

America: [also list girls like as you weren’t sure but also fine if you’re gonna be like that about the boys lol]

Libi: [again just no-ing any girls she doesn’t like whether that’s genuinely or doesn’t like the look of when she’s doing this lil search because we’ve said you’re a bit of a bitch in this reboot so]

America: 😆

Libi: What’s funny?

America: you

America: for someone who’s never thrown a party you’re v discerning now

Libi: Um, I’m not sorry about it so

America: funny don’t = bad

America: I like it

Libi: Aw, tah for liking me 😘

America: duh, I like [Violette] ‘cos she’s fun and funny, what’s not to like about you

Libi: I like her too, she’s definitely one of my favourite family members

Libi: but I haven’t felt fun or funny lately, suppose

America: we’ll fix that

America: and get you a super hot outfit for the party

Libi: If he could just remember how fun and funny I am, that might help to start fixing things

America: he can’t be emo like you cheated on him forever

Libi: He could, I’d get it, but I’ll hate it

America: my mam has cheated on every boyfriend she’s ever had, told Gaz that when he moved himself in

America: it’s bad but like, no ones dead

Libi: Did your mum ever fuck her boyfriend’s brother though?

Libi: Bobby has 2, you see, well, he did

America: don’t wanna diminish by saying yeah

America: married does hit different there, I guess 😬

Libi: It’s such a mess, and we’re too sober to get into all the gory details

America: I won’t force it out of you even though it sounds properly interesting 

America: won’t be when you’re sobbing into your cake

Libi: I’ll save sobbing for when everyone finds out

America: he’s lucky he can’t hear

America: it’ll be a rough week ‘til they get over it

Libi: I wouldn’t rush to translate it, even if he was speaking to me

America: I can take the heat, got time to think up a proper scandal

Libi: That’s the nicest anyone has been to me in ages

America: 😇 but that is not the rep

Libi: Your secret identity is safe 

America: your party is a good setting for my cancellation, who knows what I’ll get up to, real or fake

Libi: 📹📼🔒

America: 😈 uploads only

Libi: Promise, I owe you that

America: you’re cute, you don’t deserve everyone talking bad about you over something you didn’t do

Libi: But they’re going to, I might as well do something that’s at least fun at the time and only a bad idea in hindsight

America: you want me, I get it 😘

Libi: Find me when I’ve had a few drinks, who knows

America: 🥵

Libi: Jokes aside, you should, I haven’t been drunk very much

America: I won’t take advantage or let it happen to you when I’m more than willing

Libi: I’m pretty confident I could beat the shit out of most boys on your list, if I had to

America: really?

Libi: Yeah, most of my family 🥊 you have to opt out of getting taught or it’s standard

America: that’s cool, I’m just gonna have to 💋 my way out of trouble

Libi: OR I could teach you some things, one day

America: we can swap skills

Libi: I think you teaching me how to 💋 would only get me in trouble

America: are you accusing me of being a crap kisser?! 🙀

Libi: I would never

America: you’re right though, bringing you into a lesbian scandal doesn’t keep your name out of everyone’s mouths

Libi: And anyway, I know how to

America: did you kiss Bobby

Libi: When we were kids I wouldn’t stop, I always got told off for it 

America: boyfriends were SOOOOO easy to keep in little school

Libi: In fairness to little me, we did have a wedding, so technically he was my husband at the time 

America: mother mary will be buzzing 

Libi: I’m loyal like that 💍

America: good girl like that, blatantly what Lucas thinks

America: not realising you’ve got a 🥊 ready for him

Libi: The scandal is me accidentally murdering him when I get given another detention without you in it

America: no one would be gutted, local hero, like

Libi: I’d rather get on the front pages for my 📹📼 but at least he’ll be dead, massive silver lining there

America: yeah how much say would you get on the prison documentary they do

Libi: I’ll do my best to end up with final say, or who have I become whilst inside but a shell of my former self

America: too good already to find Jesus in there, not sure enough on girls

America: got to stick to your art, babe

Libi: 🤝

America: if I end up inside, I will be SO ready to be someone’s bitch

Libi: I’d visit but I don’t wanna make trouble for you when they end up fuming and jealous about it, we might have to stick to letters instead

America: nothing gay about that 😏

Libi: It would be a plot twist, nobody expects it of me

America: 💔 the male population

Libi: I swear the entire population thinks what you thought, that I’d only write love letters to the one specific boy

America: you were close, you’re both good looking and not technically related, people assume things

Libi: 💔 for the were you just said

America: 😶🤐 ugh, sorry, I only meant that you aren’t right now not that you won’t be again

Libi: It’s not your fault, like it isn’t mine I can’t help missing him so much

America: 😥 it’ll be okay

Libi: 🎂🤞🌠🙏🔮

America: he’s as in love with you, he just needs to be a dude and rage first 🥊😤😡🤬😖😠👿👊

Libi: He isn’t in love and he doesn’t 🥊😤😡🤬😖😠👿👊 I get what you mean though, things have to eventually go back to normal

Libi: even if it’s a new normal 🤏

America: 😢😭😩😣😨😰😥😓😞😔😟😕🙁☹️ would’ve seemed like more of a dig but yeah

America: no one can stay in their feels forever

Libi: It’ll be okay

America: totally, like mam will eventually cheat on Gaz and he’ll leave us to our life like it was before

Libi: All we have to do is wait

America: ⏱

America: don’t mean we can’t have fun in the meantime

Libi: 🥳 starts rn, why not?

America: rn rn?

America: set that rsvp to asap 💃

Libi: One way to find out who’s dead keen

America: oh that becomes well apparent, had a hard job getting some people to leave ours

America: but you won’t have that issue, you can leave when the parties over and not deal with the cleanup or comedowns

Libi: Not caring how anybody else feels is as good as a house rule for my aunty and her boyfriend the rest of the time, I won’t feel bad

America: it’s your birthday, no rules apply anyhow

Libi: Exactly the thinking I need to do more of

Libi: it isn’t gonna feel like my birthday ‘til I start acting like it

America: 🍾🍾🍾

America: I’ll take some of my mam and nans

Libi: And I’ll hit up my granddad, he never says no

America: people should byob but some are stingy so you have to have something to offer, like

Libi: At the very least drinks to offer you and me before people start showing their faces

America: what are you thinking on wearing, what’s the vision

Libi: Think back to how I used to dress for your sister’s birthdays

Libi: we can probably tone it down now I’m not 4, but still, a homage, you know? Something little me’d be proud of this me for

America: ✨🧝‍♀️🦄🤩🧜‍♀️🤠👸😎🦋🧚‍♀️🌈 

Libi: 👽🐅🔮👑🦸‍♀️⭐️🩰👩‍🚀🦕🌌🔫🎀 too, yeah

America: i’m excited, i haven’t had an excuse to dress up for forever

Libi: I’m excited for your 💡

America: anything with glitter, feathers, studs or sparkles

Libi: Anything that’ll take ages to clean up, I see where you’re going with this

America: more camp than slutty but with a side of 😘

Libi: 😏

America: if you want ages to clean up, loads of 💡 for that

Libi: I bet you’ve got loads of horror stories from the parties at yours

America: beer is so sticky

Libi: I’ve learned how true that is from granddad’s pub

America: such a useful family member to have

Libi: He’s one of the good ones, for sure

America: nans discount at [some Irish equivalent of poundland, you know the vibe] isn’t that amazing, ngl

Libi: You’ve already helped massively, it’s okay for you to just sit back and be the guest of honour, besides me

America: you’re so sweet

Libi: Credit where it’s due, and you’re the reason this party is happening, so ✨

Libi: I’d have talked myself out of it, same as I did going to yours

America: you’re just feeling shit too, that’s understandable as well

America: just in my experience, it doesn’t help anything 

Libi: Nor in mine, I’ve been moping for a whole month and it’s gotten me nowhere

America: trying to be 😁 is at least more interesting

America: besides, if everyone else is moping then you’ll never get any attention doing the same act, trust me, Chi is always ☹️ no point me playing 2nd

Libi: I have the least reason to be upset anyway, accepting the fact makes more sense than not, if everyone’s that determined to have it feel like such a competition

America: most things are, people just pretend its fair when they’re the winners

Libi: But actually nothing’s fair and it never has been, behind all the make believe

America: that’s a thought that needs a few beers to handle, some glitter thrown on it too maybe

Libi: To be continued… 

America: good end card

Libi: I like it, has the most possibilities

America: me too ✨

Bobby: What are you even doing

Libi: It’s my birthday

Libi: almost

Bobby: so you, what, exactly

Libi: What does it look like?

Libi: oh and hey, btw, since you weren’t gonna say it

Bobby: Because it’s me whos acting different, right you are

Libi: Different towards me, if you’re ready to have this convo now

Bobby: You’re the one thinking you’re cool having some stupid party and not even inviting me

Libi: I am cool, and you used to be the first one to think so, but you don’t even talk to me anymore, that’s why I didn’t invite you

Bobby: you didn’t invite me for the same reason you’re posting it all over the place

Libi: What, Bobs? Go on, enlighten me

Bobby: for attention and to be a dick about it

Libi: Wanting some attention don’t mean I’m a dick, you know what my birthday means to me, how important making memories is

Libi: and as things stand, I had no idea if we were going to do anything at all, nevermind our traditions

Bobby: so you had a party somewhere I can’t go, makes sense

Libi: *Somewhere that deserves to get trashed

Libi: it’s the only place a party getting a bit messy wouldn’t matter

Bobby: Whatever, I don’t care at all about that

Bobby: just don’t pretend you do when it’s obvious you don’t

Libi: I do care, which is why I’ve been giving you all the space you asked for, even though it’s killing me

Bobby: you care about everyone telling you how cool you and your party are, that’s really lame

Libi: If it was true it would be, but it’s just not

Bobby: yeah, right, it just looks that desperate

Libi: Bobby, come on

Libi: if I’m desperate for anything it’s to get to feel less shit for a minute, aren’t you?

Bobby: and hows that working out for you

Libi: I’m trying, at least

Bobby: Dead happy for you

Libi: Be here, break something, it might help

Libi: please

Bobby: no thanks, I’m not that immature

Libi: Then be here and prove how mature you are, whatever

Bobby: you heard, there’s 0 chance I’m going there

Libi: Okay, tell me what would increase my chances of us back in each others lives

Bobby: You’re being dramatic, none of us have gone nowhere but them two

Libi: No, you’ve shut me out

Libi: but I can be dramatic if you like, if you want me to beg this is me begging right now

Bobby: Why would I want any of this stupid shit

Libi: You tell me, it’s happening on your terms, all of it

Bobby: Have a nice night

Libi: Like I said, your fucking terms all the time

Bobby: I’m not gonna talk to you when you’re being all aggressive, you’re clearly pissed

Libi: You’re not gonna talk to me anyway, it’s just an excuse

Libi: I could be the nicest ever and you still wouldn’t bother

Bobby: I don’t reckon you could, nah

Libi: You reckon I’m who doesn’t care

Libi: Why don’t you miss me even a little bit?

Bobby: You’re just being really childish, about all this

Libi: Yeah well, trying to be mature about it has done nothing

Libi: answer my question

Bobby: No, Libi

Libi: It’s been [a really specific countdown on the length of time, which will make you sound unhinged]

Libi: When will you talk to me then?

Bobby: you’re making things up we talk every day

Libi: We don’t, I tell you what’s going on in lessons every day

Bobby: that’s talking

Libi: No, it isn’t

Bobby: 🙄

Libi: Right, I’m a dick, I’m childish, but it’s alright for you to 🙄

Bobby: I’m not doing no back and forth with you when you’ve got more important things to be getting on with

Libi: You’re the most important person in the world to me, ffs

Bobby: right

Libi: It did used to feel right to you, or I thought it did

Libi: I don’t know what I’m supposed to think now

Bobby: you don’t know what you’re doing, you’re acting like a massive idiot for what, her attention

Libi: You’re the idiot, I have hers whenever I want it, she’s never stopped loving me, she won’t

Bobby: funny way of showing it

Libi: And this was obviously a funny way of showing you I need yours, but everything I do is for you, despite everyone telling me it shouldn’t be

Bobby: I just

Bobby: don’t have any spare right now, he needs it all

Libi: So forget me for a sec, how about what you need?

Libi: I know you’re upset, you hate them, this is your chance to take that out of something other than me, I’m in the perfect place for it and you could be here too

Bobby: You think that wrecking their place will make me feel anything, do you know me at all

Bobby: that’s what they’d do, not me, no thanks

Libi: I’m asking you to try, for me, cos I don’t know what else to do

Bobby: I don’t want to, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard

Libi: What’s your genius idea? We carry on as we are?

Bobby: I know what I’m up to, I’m looking after Jim

Libi: Okay, I’m glad one of us isn’t totally lost

Libi: give him my love

Bobby: you made this choice yourself

Libi: The choice to celebrate my birthday? Yeah, I did, and I’d make it the same again, I only get one 14th

Bobby: and you made it for you so don’t be chatting no bollocks like you’ve done anything for me

Libi: Tell yourself you’re not front and centre of every decision I’ve made for almost my whole life if you want

Bobby: you didn’t invite me, you didn’t ask me my opinion even

Libi: I can’t fucking hack no more rejection off you, I’m not over how much it hurt when you wanted me to leave

Bobby: I’m not going to tell you somethings a good idea when it ain’t, that you’re not making a massive twat of yourself just ‘cos you wanna hear it

Libi: I don’t care about this party, it’s if you’d said we weren’t going to spend any of my birthday together and what that means

Libi: *when you said, cos you already have that you’ve got no attention left to give me

Bobby: you’ve decided that, ‘cos you didn’t fucking bother to ask

Bobby: you make up problems to have for a fucking plot point

Libi: It’s my birthday, my mum spent her 14th [doing whatever mad shit we all know Edie did always] she wouldn’t be happy if I spent mine gutted and nor would I, that’s all very real

Bobby: so, have an awesome time and film it so its real

Libi: Fuck you, that’s so uncalled for

Bobby: I’m going to bed

Libi: Good, I hope you have nightmares after being such a dickhead

Bobby: 👍

Libi: You should’ve just left it at 👍 ages ago, says it all

Bobby: how much you don’t wanna chat to us is really obvious, you’re alright

Libi: You’re the one using 😴🛏 as a get out clause from having to speak to me

Bobby: you ain’t saying anything

Bobby: and some of us have got reason to be tired

Libi: I’m not saying exactly what you wanna hear, more like 

Bobby: bold of you to assume you have any clue what I want to hear when it’s obvious that’s so far from the truth

Libi: Wow, okay

Bobby: Why are you surprised?

Libi: You’d say it or I’d still give you the credit of reckoning you wouldn’t?

Bobby: You’re trying to get in trouble, why are you shocked it worked

Libi: *have some fun

Bobby: since when has that been your idea of fun

Libi: When I was a kid I loved parties, don’t you remember?

Bobby: you’re not a kid now

Libi: I know, but, for one night, why can’t I act like one?

Bobby: no ones stopping you

Libi: You’re right, Bobs, nobody is

Bobby: 👏

Libi: Goodnight

[zumpietoo]

Errmmm....nooo...we meet Slizzy, the user and the slut, always taking credit for the accomplishments of others, fucking over others and being a trampy, violent psychopath....

No, she’s “looked to spiral” and now has “looked to a cult”..

Yes, yes....sorry, but not new..

Noooo, she’s become the champion for self victimization, being a total hypocrite, temper tantruming and body shaming other women for choices that are none of her business. Especially when she doesn’t get invited to parties. 

I met PP in LA, she was already sulking her ass off. She remains seated because she’s fucking lazy AF. She talks to me about her ladypain and not bothering to get real treatment/address her issues....she does sidestep her cult a lot this time, so maybe she’s getting bored with that shit.....otherwise, she literally says the same bullshit she always says....

There is nothing remotely “intimate” here, it’s her stand blabber (tho she might’ve let slip a thing or two)...

I fucking hate this job, even tho it’s the best I’m ever gonna do. But I like to pretend otherwise. Also, do you have $5 to give me? I need $$$

I actually haven’t and I’m seekritly fully aware I suck ass. I’m also seekritly aware this is the best it’s ever gonna be and I’m staring down obscurity already. And by “my style”, I mean everybody kissing my ass...

No, in fact, I have to buy my way onto things. This is some bullshit I’ve made up, since the role/project is on indefinite hold, anyway.....and I was neverrrr gonna get it. And even if I had, would’ve fallen flat on my face.

I was sooooo speshullllllll.....and sensitive, cuz that’s how I like to see myself when I’m a difficult mess....

Sooo, soooo, SOOOOOOO speshul....

I wanted lots of attention and could tell Cole was finally getting REALLY fed up with my bullshit for good, so I figured I’d preemptively shade him with this....also I really like $$$, so I figured I’d “publish” shit I’d shared with my fandumb for free on tumblr all along....

I can’t believe people are such meanies that they actually CRITICIZED  my middle school style whining!!!

Oh no, I routinely excuse myself from everything! And I, in fact, exactly wanted everybody to see how deep and sensitive I am....and to start shading Cole, cuz how dare he get fed up with me fucking around and making my MH issues the central focus of our relationship? It’s like he thought HE was a person with needs, tooo!!!

AND HOW DARE HE FUCKING DUMP ME AND START DATING, A FULL YEAR LATER, A WOMAN WAY SKINNIER THAN I AM?????

Alsoooo.....my costars point at me and call me “fatty”. Except FT, cuz her ass is huge....oh and Shannon, but I don’t count her. She’s moar Cole’s friend and actually talented/serious about her craft....

By “therapist” I mean cult leader, buuut..... Oh yeah....and did I mention, as I’m saying this, I’m a total hypocrite who gets lots of plastic surgery? Cuz this is all legit bullshit......it’s soooo hard.....

I was told to ask you about something you never shut up about/is not remotely new info! BTW....did you just basically say “you’re bi-polar”??? Cuz that isn’t how depression works....

Also I believe you have no “healthy relationships” in your life atm and the last (possibly only ever) one was Cole, correct? Is that why you’re stalking him/his current GF with his other ex?

Oh also, I totally am NOT “trying to escape” by being in a cult, doing drugs a lot and “talking to ghosts thru the ether”...

People don’t, actually...my agent had to really haul ass to make it happen. I have exposed myself as a whiny hypocrite who just wants to get attention, sympathy and most importantly swag/$$$.

Also, I’ve been telling peeps they “don’t know what I’m capable of” since 2017....so plenty of time to change that. I’m too lazy and entitled....this is my slightly humbler version, cuz I’m also soooperrr gloomy these days. 

But, again, depression rocks...see above!