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aimless-imagines-for-fun · 2 years

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Phone Fun

Pairing :: Tangerine x fem!Reader

Warnings :: 18+ Content, SMUT/NSFW, Phone sex, Masturbation(F&M)

Word Count :: 1310

Summary :: Tangerine’s been gone for a while and you each miss each other a lot

A/N :: I KNOW I’VE BEEN GONE FOR LIKE EVER BUT we should have all accepted by now this is the type of person I am. I am sorry. Please forgive me for my laziness.

It’s not funny like at all how quickly I became a slut for this man. I even bought the book Bullet Train so I could get more of him. I also might make a small/mini series for him bc I think it’s hilarious if he dated someone who had no clue he was an assassin.

Tangerine is a professional. He does his job by the book(at least to the best of his abilities, given his line of work), quick and easy. He isn't the type to make mistakes or take risks. With that being said, he does everything he can to keep his work life and private life completely separate, even if that means lying to the person he loves most.

You hadn’t the slightest clue as to who he actually was. Everything you knew about him was an intricately fabricated lie of a life he created for you to believe. For starters, he told you his name was Gordon, and Lemon’s was Thomas. Lemon was happy he used names from Thomas The Tank Engine but would’ve preferred they had gone by Donald and Douglas since they’re brothers. Then, he told you he and Lemon both worked for a private security service firm that worked high-profile jobs. With this lie, you never questioned when he traveled to foreign countries for various periods of time. However, this also led you to presume he worked somewhat normal hours.

On more than one occasion, you called Tangerine while he was in the middle of work, and being the worry-wort he was when it came to you, he immediately answered after scrambling to find a decently quiet place to talk to you. Luckily, the calls were never because anything had happened to you or you somehow magically learned about the double-life he led and now wished to cut all ties with the contract-killer. Typically it was because you simply missed him and walked to talk to him for a bit, making sure he was okay.

Lemon always thought a simple text would have sufficed rather than a call. When he told Tangerine to tell you so, he received a menacing glare in response. After that, he completely threw out the thought of convincing him to tell you the truth.

Today’s call was not normal though.

“God am I glad you called.” Tangerine sat down on his bed, glad Lemon was out grabbing food so he could have a private chat.

You were able to hear clearly through the phone his exhaustion. “Was it rough today?”

He let out a deep sigh, earning a small chuckle. “You have no idea love.”

“You’ll be home soon, right?”

“Yeah, in two days.”

“I miss you so much.”

He was gone for nearly a month, jobs booked back-to-back. Before this, the longest he had been away was barely under two weeks.

Tangerine was looking forward to engulfing you in a large hug and pressing his lips against you in a passionate kiss. You never admitted it, but you became quite needy whenever he was gone. He never had any complaints since the sex when he got when he came back was always amazing. He couldn’t wait to toss you onto the bed, though he doubted if you two would make it to your room before you started your fun.

“This is gonna sound silly but…” You were hesitating. He was sure you had that shy smile you always put on when you were embarrassed right now. “I’m only wearing one of your button-ups right now.”

Only. That word rang in his head like a bell. “Oh really?”

Even though you knew he was returning soon, you were still incredibly lonely. Without thinking you grabbed one of his shirts and immediately a small smile formed due to the familiar scent that lingered. He didn’t use harsh over-bearing cologne that had multiple ingredients mixed creating a headache of a smell. Rather, he used a simple citrus herbal mix. Hints of orange and lemon hid under a woodsy scent with a slight spice.

Then, a slightly devious plan formed in your head, leading you to this very moment.

“Mhm.” You bit your lip, trying not to smile even though he couldn’t see you.

“And what are you doing right now?”

“What do you think I’m doing?”

“I think you’re waiting in bed for me to come fuck you.” The sudden drop in tone shot a tingle down your spine, the warmth between your thighs growing.

“Ding-ding.”

“Have you started touching yourself?”

“Not yet.”

“Why not?”

“Because I wanted to tease you.”

A dark laugh left his lips. “You know I don’t enjoy being teased love.”

“Exactly.”

Whenever you made the reckless decision to tease him, he would often end up turning the tables and turned you into a moaning mess. Sometimes you did it on accident, other times it was on purpose because you loved how worked up he’d get.

You let out a soft hum, starting by massaging your breasts. “Don’t worry, I’ll go nice and slow so you know everything I’m doing.” You pinched your nipples, rolling them between your fingers.

You always knew how to turn him on. It was truly a gift you had. Hearing your small satisfied hums, he began to grow hard and found himself palming the bulge in his pants that was forming.

One of your hands traveled downwards to start rubbing your wet folds. “Hnng...” You imagined he was here with you, taking care of your needs. You rubbed a small circle around your clit, doing your best to enjoy the moment instead of speedily making yourself cum.

Hearing a small zip and fabric moving, you knew he was doing the same. He began stroking his length, remembering the tightness of your cunt.

You were growing wetter by the second, so when you moved your other hand down to insert a finger a soft sucking sound of the mess you were creating was now heard. This caused his dick to twitch, eager to be wrapped around you.

You stopped rubbing your clit momentarily to stick in a second finger and begin pumping, hoping the wet sounds would excite him. Precum began beading at the top of his cock so he used it to help lubricate his shaft. Going at a pace that matched yours, his grip was tight but paled in comparison to your cunt.

Both of you could hear the other’s desperation in your moans. You each wanted to touch one another so badly but had to suffice with the situation at hand.

Deciding you needed more friction, you pulled your fingers out and sat up.

“What are you doing now, love?”

Shamelessly you replied, “I’m going to ride your pillow darling.”

“Fuck.” His balls tightened.

As your hips began rocking back and forth on his pillow, he began to thrust up in the air, each of you pretending you were riding him now.

Growing closer, you started rubbing your clit again, your fingers moving much harsher than before. He was also getting ready to cum, so he quickly threw off his vest and unbuttoned his shirt so that way they wouldn’t get ruined.

Your paced hips grew sloppy and your panting much louder. His groaning was becoming deeper, pumping and thrusting as if he was fucking.

“Ahh!”

The heat building in your stomach was begging to be released. You stopped moving, straddling the pillow with your hand between your legs. Your hand moved quickly across your clit until the tingling sensation finally broke. Your entire body tensed up, continuing to press firmly against the sensitive nub while your pussy clenched to release.

With his own muscles tense, hearing your cry of pleasure his cock twitched again, finally ready to cum. His tight sack finally contracted, releasing hot shots of cum that landed right on his abdomen. He released his hold, his cock continuing to jump as his entire load came out.

The only thing that could be heard now were the small breaths you were each taking to compose yourselves.

“Well this was fun,” You said while flopping onto your back.

“Fun, but not as good as the real deal.”

“Two more days until then.”

#bullet train #bullet train tangerine #tangerine #aaron taylor johnson #aaron taylor johnson smut #aaron taylor johnson fanfic #bullet train tangerine smut #tangerine x reader #tangerine smut #bullet train tangerine x reader

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painedpen · 5 months

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Tell me anything and everything abt your headcanons and stuff for Mondo Owada, I'm all ears! He's one of my favorites so I'd love to hear what you think‼️

Thank you very much but you have no clue what you’ve just unleashed.

Fluff:

- Mondo’s maternal family originated from France, so French is his and Daiya’s first language. Of course, Mondo has never met his mother’s family… yet.

- Speaking of maternal family, anyone wanna take a guess as to what his mother’s maiden name is? Anyone? Too late, it’s Akamatsu.

- So yeah, Kaede is Mondo and Daiya’s little cousin. Kaede is about two or three years younger than Mondo, and she’s delighted to find her long lost cousin at her new high school.

- Due to having to fend for themselves at a young age, both Mondo and Daiya are really good cooks. The difference between them is that Mondo refuses to allow anyone else in the kitchen when he’s cooking. Think Gordon Ramsey but somehow even worse.

- Mondo will never admit to anyone that he likes to cook. God forbid you ask him to cook for you. Unless you’re sick or like really sad. He’ll tell you to never tell anyone though.

- Physical affection is not only his love language, it’s his way of life. Every time you see him, he’s leaning on or hugging one of his classmates. He’s like a really big cat.

- When he was a kid, Daiya couldn’t leave him alone for a moment, cause every time he came back Mondo would have befriended some random animal of prey. Daiya turns around and Mondo is cradling a Great Horned Owl in his arms like a baby.

- Mondo hasn’t been able to bring himself to have another pet since Chuck, so instead he co-parents everyone else’s pets. He’s already won over Celeste’s cat.

- Most of his childhood was spent around a pack of stray animals. One day, a cat curled up on his lap and started purring, and Mondo was like “heehee funny noise” and started mimicking it. Long story short, Mondo purrs as a stim.

- He’s the best adoptive big brother ever. Are you an only child, or just temporarily sad for some reason? Boom, Mondo’s your big brother now. No, no, don’t fight it.

- After befriending Kiyotaka, Mondo went to his French class for the first time in his school career. (He picked it because it was an easy A.) Listening to his teacher, he realized very quickly that she was not a native speaker, nor had she learned from a native speaker. He was quiet for a solid five minutes and then said, in perfect French, “What the fuck are you talking about??”

- Dyslexia makes it so that letters and words are hard for him to understand. But numbers? Ohoho he knows all about those little bitches! Because of this, he’s shockingly good at subjects like Algebra and Calculus.

Angst: (CW: Abandonment, dissociation, child abuse, neglect, violence)

- Mondo’s dad was a real piece of shit to both his wife and kids. Unfortunately, Moselle, his mother, could only find one way to cope with it. She dissociated to the point where she couldn’t recognize her children.

- Daiya and Mondo didn’t know what was wrong with her, so they always said that “Maman is just away.”

- While Daiya was busy trying to take care of his little brother, Mondo dedicated himself to taking care of their mother. Despite Moselle not being able to do much more than basic self-care, Mondo was convinced that she was just sick, and that they needed to help her get better.

- I won’t go into heavy details, but Mondo and Daiya ended up homeless. After the trauma of what he went through with his parents, Mondo went entirely nonverbal for several years.

- One day, while Daiya was away looking for a source of income, Mondo was mugged while alone. A shot through the shoulder left him on the floor looking for help. No one bothered until Officer Takaaki Ishimaru came along. He got Mondo to a hospital just in time.

- Because of nights spent outside, Mondo tends to get Wind Anxiety. When the wind blows fast enough to be heard from inside, Mondo automatically starts shivering. It doesn’t matter if he actually feels cold or not, it’s just an unfortunate muscle memory.

- Mondo doesn’t remember a lot about his childhood, but he finds he can’t forget what his mother’s face looked like just before her death. He refuses to sleep most days because his dreams are full of her eyes looking directly at him.

- Daiya doesn’t remember a thing, but Mondo refuses to remind him. He’d rather Daiya live in blissful ignorance than have him suffer the way Mondo has.

- Mondo still goes nonverbal sometimes, so he likes to wear a face mask. He looks intimidating in that, so no one tries to talk to him when he’s wearing it. Win-win.

- While the Crazy Diamonds is genuinely fun, it’s not a healthy environment for Mondo in the slightest. There’s a large minority of members who still think he’s too weak to be in the gang. They constantly try to pester and bully him into retiring early.

- It was even worse when Daiya was still in charge. Almost everyone hated him. He would get into fights, people would tell him that he should get into a crash and die so that they wouldn’t have to deal with him anymore. It was rough.

- Even so, Mondo stayed quiet about it. These people were like family to Daiya, and Mondo didn’t want to be the reason Daiya lost any more family. When Daiya asked why he’d come home with bruises all over, Mondo would blame it on a rival gang.

- The first time Hiroko met Mondo, she gave him a hug. She did that thing moms do, cradling the back of his head and neck with her hand protectively. Mondo absolutely melted.

Platonic Pairings:

Mondo + Kyoko:

- These two mean. So much to me.

- They are both black cat coded but in completely different ways. Like Kyoko is a mysterious and dark Witch’s Familiar, and Mondo is a moody dumbass who likes snuggles.

- Kyoko’s love language isn’t physical affection. But she spontaneously decides to cuddle with Mondo for an hour and a half to the second, and then silently leaves.

- Mondo joins Kyoko on her murder investigations sometimes. He contributes practically nothing, he’s just here to hang out. Kyoko appreciates his presence anyway.

Mondo + Chihiro:

- Okay this one’s just obvious.

- I don’t even think I need to say anything about this.

Mondo + Toko:

- Mwah. Delicious.

- I think that Mondo would hate the way Byakuya treats Toko, and would start aggressively defending her.

- He starts “training” her in order to try and get her confidence up.

- Like, Toko wears a rubber band around her wrist that Mondo snaps every time she self-deprecates. Pavlov her into positive self talk, y’know?

- Toko tells Byakuya to go fuck himself and Mondo stands in the background, wiping a tear from his eye.

Mondo + Celeste:

- Sibling energy frfr.

- They scream at each other in French, but would go to war for each other no questions asked.

- They shit-talk other people together.

- Celeste forces him to wear his hair down every now and again because “The big hair distracts from your pretty face!”

- Mondo points out that she’s a hypocrite. Celeste doesn’t care.

- These two fight so much but there’s no real animosity behind it. Not that anyone around them can tell. Everyone else thinks that they just plain hate each other.

Mondo + Gundham:

- Childhood friends. Hear me out.

- Mondo found a really sick stray puppy when he was little and rushed him to the vet. The vet said that since Mondo didn’t have any money, there was nothing they could do. Mondo was really upset.

- Baby Gundham came up behind them like “You foulest of fiends! It would seem your soul has been buried under stone, if you have it in you to turn away a creature in need. Worry not, mortal, for I, the great Gundham Tanaka, will help you restore this dark beast to its rightful glory!”

- Baby Mondo was like “Okay lol” and they both left.

- That’s how Mondo got Chuck.

Mondo + Mikan:

- Hoo boy!!

- Mondo is in the infirmary a lot due to obvious reasons, so it’s only natural that he would be friendly with the nurse.

- Every time Hiyoko or someone else tries to come in and bully Mikan, Mondo picks them up by the neck and throws them out.

- It’s gotten to the point where, even if Mondo isn’t there, Mikan will just tell people “If you won’t leave me alone, I’ll call Owada!” No one fucks with that.

- Overall, having Mondo’s protection is a huge confidence boost for her.

Kay there you go.

#danganronpa #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #mondo owada #trigger happy havoc #mondo oowada #headcanons #fanfic #fluff #angst #kyoko kirigiri #chihiro fujisaki #toko fukawa #celestia ludenberg #gundham tanaka #mikan tsumiki #mondoblr

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gingkos-eldritch-secret · 7 months

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Fanfiction commentary and recommendations: Lex Luthor´s ascend from supervillainy to fatherhood Part V (chapters 21 to 25)

The Original story by @halfagone can be found here.

The previous parts of the commentaries can be found here:

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

Part VI

Part VII

We left off with the Joker free, Parental figures and vigilantes worrying and a legendary girl´s night. What could go wrong?

The answer is everything.

I´ll warn you now, because I´ll be discussing the things happening in the fic: be cautious about the gore and torture and visceral descriptions about violence here. I mean, it´s Danny Phantom and DC. So a little bit of this shouldn´t surprise any of us if we think about the subject matter. Especially because it´s the joker we´re talking about. But yeah. Even though I won´t be all to graphicgraphic, I´ll still be referencing these topics.

On another note: the social media part of this fanfiction is giving me life.

○○○••○○•••○○••○○○

Now we dive right into the first scene, where goodbyes are being made. Catwoman goes home after a night of card games and shenanigans and Danny sleeps on the couch squished between two hyenas and please could someone draw this scene? Because it sounds utterly adorable. Or has he slept earlier? I have no clue, my reading comprehension at 3 o´clock in the morning has never been the best.

Or well. Danny already has slept on the couch. Now he just wants to flee from a certain ex-villain who wants to put him into one of her old costumes.

Selina meets Bruce on the way home, who seemed to have had a long night of searching behind him. And still, as exhausted as he must look, she is still thristing after him. Power to you, i guess. I mean it´s the two furry adjacent people, so I´m not surprised xD

They also talk about the reason 'why' bruce is so tired and Selina finally grants him a small respite and just tells him where Danny was - and off the bat goes in the hope that he´ll find Danny before the Joker does. And that´s just the problem, isn´t it? Because when it is foreshadowed like this? It never happens as we hope it does. So, of course the Joker finds Danny first, but that comes later.

First Harley and Ivy´s place gets blown up, while Danny has been on his wa to Wayne manor. Does he go farther away from the explosion? Of course not. It´s Danny 'herocomplex' Luthor we´re talking about. So, of course, he runs towards his new friends´house.

And as hard as Tim tries to get there in time, Danny was faster and the Joker? He had already been waiting. They straight up drive into Danny with a van and pick him off the floor like a ragdoll before they zoom off. Not that it will do the Joker and his goons any good in the long run, but for now they´ve certainly succeeded in their quest for violence.

As the clown realizes that Danny is Luthor´s ward and not Batman's he gets the absolutely hilarious (not) idea of getting a camera. With the thought process 'what will Lexie do when the brat is being being broken and tortured on live camera'? God, he´s such an awful person.

Though I think that is quite degratory to the 'person' part of this sentence. I don´t know what I want to call the joker, but even monsters have more humanity than this. So then what is he? An abomination? A thing? A blight on humanity? Either way, he´ll get his comeuppance.

So the joker broadcasts a torturing session on live television. With Danny already roughed up from the … way he has been brought to unconciousness by the man and his goons.

Meanwhile good old Jim Gordon is feeling faint because. That´s Lex Luthor´s son. That´s a civillian. That´s a freaking CHILD being tortured. And he can´t even do anything to help.

The Joker gets some torture advice from the life stream viewers (and how much do you have to abhro a person to do something like this? How inhumane must you be? How much must you dehumanize the person being tortured to even get the bright idea to bring them even more pain?). And also just uses some of the nice comments for torture adivce. Someone compliments Danny´s eyes? Would be a shame if we took them now, wouldn´t it?

I think poor old Jim worries even more because Danny is so uncharacteristically silent. Not. That him being loud would be much better, what with the Joker being the Joker …

And Lex is just entering boss mode as he watches his son beng tortured on live television. I understand the man.

And the bats are just frantically searching for the warehouse used. One of these days they´re getting a heart attack from all of their regular adrenaline highs.

So while the Joker just gloats into the live stream and taunts the viewers he does not realize that Danny being Danny slipped through his bonds and took the knife stuck in his thigh out all the while slipping into the darkness to ambush the joker with a gun. He took out the camera instead and the chase? Was on.

It really is an action scene absolutely worth reading, but it ends with Danny getting a shot to the shoulder and Joker getting a shot to the chest. Of course that doesn´t stop our most hated abomination though. Oh No. He wants to take Danny with him.

And Danny? He has had enough. He just. Melts the Joker´s brain via eldritch form and that´s that for now. Until Jason bursts in and finds them and just gets Danny the hell out of dodge and into a hospital.

Though at first there´s Jason freaking out a bit at the situation because: how did that happen? I mean, I understand his priorities. Especially because Danny doesn´t look like he could pack a punch and the Joker seems to have died because of fright (though he also realizes that he died of blood loss) - with his hair turned white and his face a mask of horror. But the man who killed him is finally, finally gone. And while he ruminates Danny wakes up.

Jason realizes Danny knows it´s himself. He realizes that Danny somehow knows his idendity and while he wants to talk about THAT, he also sees just how horrible Danny´s condition is and wants to get Danny to agree to a hospital. Good idea, but the trauma is just. The trauma …. Poor Danny.

He´s still a snarky little shit though, because he instantly banters with Jason as he does first aid, horrified at the implications of Danny knowing how to get a bullet out of himself via FORK. Danny what the fuck???

So while Jason gets Danny to some transport vehicle, they talk. And Jason grapples with the inormation that a) Danny somehow seems to be able to see souls and b) has died before.

It´s kinda ruined by Danny telling him that 'I told you guys I had a heart failure. You realize that you technically die when your heart stops, right?` Never change Danny, never change. Now, we know that that´s not the whole truth, but ... yeah I can see why he´d use that as a shield. It is technically the truth after all.

So while the GCPD forces Danny into the hospital, Danny …. Wants Jason to come with him. Jason can´t really say no when Danny trembles with fear, now, can he? At least one of them doesn´t have to be alone with their fears for now.

Lex is on a more or less literal warpath as he storms into the hospital asking after his son. And he begins to immediately rip into Gordon beause that is his son. With a hospital trauma. In a hospital. And while he still doesn´t like this, at least Red Hood is with him. Better him than Brucie boy in any way. (And wow, that were many 'hospitals' in a short paragraph ...)

Danny and Jason talk and I think Danny was this close to fist fighting the doctors when they wanted to give him an anaesthetic for the bullet removal. I like the attitude and I know he did it, because those things don´t work on his weird biology, but still. The part of me is just so immensely worried it´s not even funny anymore.

Jason is doing an introspection about Danny and his pain tolerance, the reactions to hospitals and the scars and i think he just wants to put him into bubble wrap and keep him somewhere safe. i feel u bro, i really do. But as you´re part of a story, I seriously doubt you can fo that. We can´t from our past. Even if we desperately want to. Doubly so in fiction. Especially in fiction. I mean. it´s a literary device :')

Lex arrives on the scene and instantly begins to fuss over his son. It´s honestly sweet, even when he threatens the nurses and doctors present to sign NDAs or ELSE.

I also think Jason realizes how important Lex is to Danny when he just instantly melts into his arms and begins to cry, even though he´d held strong before. Nary a tear or reaction. But people do react differently with people they feel safe with.

And he feels jealous. Because he could´ve had this with bruce, couldn´t he? If not for the pit or his reactions. Or is it his own fucked up personality keeping them apart? I don´t think that Jason really knows anymore.

So while Lex thanks Red Hood for being there, Jason reveals that he hadn´t done much. Which leads to attention on Danny who´s basically like 'So I kinda maybe killed the Joker? *jazz hands*'

Which is of course the moment Batman enters. Now that can only go badly. Not that many things in this fic have gone well . I have the feeling that i say this in every part at least once and i DON´T wanna repeat myself so often, but. Well. Ain´t it the truth anyways?

So. Lex may or may not have dwindled in his opinion on both Bruce Wayne and Batman. And really, who can blame him?

One could not keep his son safe in the first place and the other couldn´t save him when the Joker got him.

Of course he´s hating the situation. And of course he´s frustrated with the people here now. Especially as Dick wants to talk to Lex alone as Gordon and Batman interrogate Danny. And it is an interrogation. Or it will be. I think that´s happening in the next part. And oh boy... It will not be pretty. At all.

Dick and Lex --- well the conversation certainly could have gone better. And they certainly could have behaved better in the first place, but …. Lex respects the honesty and the reasons. Honestly, Dick´s a straight up miracle worker in this regard. Props to him! He deserves a cake for that masterpiece. Seriously >.>

Lex not happy about any of them. Not in any defintion of the word. But he accepts it. The family is still on very thin ice for now though.

And Lex ....he now knows what other think of him as a parent. How they fear for Danny. Because a former supervllain as an adoptive father all of a sudden? People do not believe that. He realizes what could have gone wrong now. And that´s just painful to think about. Who would want to think about being a bad parent? What if Danny hadn´t wormed into his cold, dead heart? I think I´d have felt sick if I realized how close I came to being the same as the neglectful parents and the abusive godfather ...

He also thinks of how easily Danny could have been just another Wayne child instead of his own. And while he now certainly hates Bruce less, I doubt that he´ll like him either for a long time.

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featheredcritter · 1 year

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You're so right in that a lot of the best parta of half life are honestly what isn't explained at all. The combine ofc but also gman and his isms. like who the hell he's supposed to be working for or why he can't just do things himself instead of hiring Gordon/Alyx. the vagueness of it leaves so much to wonder about which makes it a lot more compelling to me. also, since i was planning to ask a question and rambled ( :pp ) The most interesting implications of half life and portal sharing a universe to you?

I loove how half life is often not direct in its story telling and just leaves the player to pick up the clues and understand what's going on around, it's so immersive and realistic because really it wouldn't make sense for you to approach a rando and they start telling you all about the suppression field. You don't need to see the horrors the combine have inflicted upon earth and its population, the way people live etc etc, just the little snippets of interactions and details and sound design lets you know, and i find it a lot more interesting than seeing a whole direct scene of a guy being turned into a stalker in front of you. I know you were mostly referring to main plot points and i agree, but wanted to tie it to the whole thing half life does in general with its story telling that i really like.

Regarding aperture and black mesa, idk if i have a favourite implication. I enjoy how they're both bat shit crazy facilities to their core but aperture is even more so to a cartoony degree. I also like to think about aperture and black mesa higher ups/personell meeting and trying so hard to be professional but god you can just feel the hatred radiating from the interactions.

#half life #asks #sorry fr it took so long to answer T_T

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lost-in-sokovia · 2 years

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OMG I would both kill and die for August!!!! Could you maybe do a fic of Batman and Gordon finding out that not only does the riddler have a girlfriend but also a son? Thank you and I adore your work <3

so just for a little context i think this takes place right before for gotham, for august and this kinda would fit in the movie right before bruce goes to see eddie in arkham when everyone is in eddie’s apartment

let them be

tw: mentions of rape and kidnapping

bruce stalked around the cluttered and dimly-lit apartment quietly, ignoring pushback from officer martinez. investigators, police officers, and other workers in the forensics unit were flashing cameras, taking dna samples, and collecting any evidence possible as they carefully ransacked the riddler’s apartment.

it was a pigsty. a dark, dirty, creepy pigsty that somewhere could contain the clues bruce and gordon were looking for. moments before they had finally caught the riddler, sure, but their work was nowhere near finished. who knew what this sick man still had planned? who was he? what was his real identity? who was involved with his work? too many unanswered questions to be solved before the case could close.

bruce’s eyes scanned slowly over a stack of magazines, and he cocked his head to the side ever so slightly. “renewal” was scribbled out on the spine of one of the magazines. renewal. something all the previous politicians in gotham had promised, what newly-elected bella real vowed to truly bring.

gordon busied himself with little diaries that eddie had. an officer explained that they had found thousands of these ledgers inscribed with ciphers and codes that made no sense to anybody. eddie had random rambles in there as well, his words meaning nothing to anybody else. it wasn’t the first time edward had used ciphers, this wasn’t anything new to gordon. as gordon and the officer stood there, a woman walked up and announced they had gathered information from one of edward’s ids that he carried. bruce turned around to hear.

“edward nashton,” the woman read off quickly. “works at KTMJ, he’s a forensic accountant.”

“accountant?” gordon asked, eyes narrowing in confusion.

“hey lieutenant!” a different officer called. “are you really okay with this? what about the chain of evidence?” the officer asked, gesturing to bruce carefully paging through one of the magazines he had previously been eyeing. bruce looked up slowly to meet gordon’s gaze.

“you should see this,” bruce said lowly. just as gordon stepped forward, the woman called for him to pause.

“that’s not all, there’s more,” she said slowly. “looking into any birth records with the last name ‘nashton’ in gotham, turns out edward has a son. his name is august edward nashton, he just turned five in october,” the woman read out. bruce blinked and an eyebrow raised beneath his mask as gordon shook his head and opened in mouth in awe.

“god almighty,” gordon breathed. “this sick man has a son?” he glanced to bruce who looked at him with the same stoic expression. “do we have any information on the mother?”

the woman was able to read out a few basics from your information; your name, place of birth, et-cetera. gordon sighed and bruce breathed slowly, thinking for a moment.

“she’s not from here originally. i think she lives here with him, though. or at least in this same complex,” the woman continued. “i found a few things in the apartment that were probably hers, as well as a few children’s clothes and some stuffed animals as well.”

everyone in the small circle stood silently as more cameras flashed around the room. nobody knew what to say to this. how could a man so vile and evil be capable to love someone and have a child with them? how could anyone love him back?

“we can talk to the landlord, he’ll know about this woman,” bruce stated in his gravelly voice. the woman nodded attentively. inside, bruce was wondering if you had any motives or even knew about what edward was carrying out. how could you not? then again, what if you were just some hostage that he had treated terribly and got you pregnant through rape? though, he probably wouldn’t have taken you to a hospital if he didn’t care, so you had to be in a relationship with him, then.

bruce gave gordon a look, to which gordon asked if everyone could leave them for a moment. the group dispersed to investigate other elements as the two men huddled together.

“a girlfriend and a son,” gordon scoffed bitterly. “my god, who could’ve thought…”

bruce stood quietly, still mulling things over in his head. gordon looked up and glanced at bruce, studying his face.

“what do we do about this?” gordon asked slowly. bruce shook his head subtly.

“nothing. who says they’re aiding him or involved?” bruce asked. august made him think of selina. august didn’t ask to be edward’s son, those were just the cards he was dealt in life. gordon’s expression hardened and he looked to bruce as if he was an idiot.

“‘nothing?’ they are the family of a murderer!” he reasoned, his voice only raising slightly.

“but that doesn’t mean they have done anything. if he really loved his kid, he wouldn’t tell him anything to prevent him from being a target. as far as the woman goes, most likely the same thing. plus, if she was helping him in any way with these killings, she’d probably want credit as well as him,” bruce explained. gordon contemplated that and lowered his head. bruce hesitated for a moment. “nobody’s saying if you find her you can’t interrogate her, but i don’t think she should be arrested.”

gordon opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by someone calling for him.

“lieutenant, we found these in a locked drawer,” an officer explained as he dropped images onto the table in front of bruce and gordon. gordon dismissed the officer before the two men scanned the images, carefully spreading them out to look at more than one. some of the images were better than others, some being images that were intently printed out and others being images like those of annika’s, slightly blurry and taken by someone else or from cameras around the city.

there were pictures of you and a slightly younger eddie smiling. there was one or two copies of what seemed to be ultrasounds, bruce understanding that they were august’s. there were pictures of you smiling as your hair blew in the wind. there were baby pictures of august, his big green doe eyes staring directly at the camera. there were pictures of you, edward, and baby august all snuggled together tiredly.

as far as the other images, there was a more recent one of you carrying august through gotham as he leaned his head on your shoulder. there was even an image of eddie holding august’s hand as they walked into a grocery store.

bruce did not want to be run off track just because of this new discovery. he didn’t deem it worthy of the gcpd’s time, seeing as though it was unlikely you were aiding edward’s crimes.

“cute kid,” gordon admitted, his voice snapping bruce back to reality. “definitely looks like the guy, there’s no denying that.”

without waiting another second bruce piled up all the images once more, beckoning over the officer who had delivered them.

“put these back where you found them,” bruce instructed. the officer nodded without hesitation and was quickly off to follow orders. when bruce turned back around gordon’s jaw was dropped.

“just like that? you’re going to put those images back where they were?” he asked slightly bitterly.

“if the riddler wanted us to see them, he would’ve laid it out more obviously for us, or somehow hinted they needed to be seen. he’s been laying out everything for us,” bruce argued back flatly. he pointed to where the officer was walking. “those images were in a locked drawer. they weren’t meant to be seen, nor did they need to be. until there’s some sort of evidence to suggest this woman is contributing to his crimes, i don’t think it’s necessary we pursue this path.”

gordon bit the inside of his lip, staring at the officer placing the images back in the wooden drawer. bruce could tell he wanted to argue but didn’t have a better reason that bruce’s.

“you can find out about this woman for yourself and that’s it. we can’t take her away, this boy needs a mother since his father is locked away in arkham.”

bruce thought of the orphanage. he thought of the riddler growing up in the orphanage. this child needed to be part of the renewal that gotham needed, and bruce was not about to put august on the same path as his father.

bruce reached a hand up and firmly grasped gordon’s shoulder.

“leave them be,” he whispered threateningly.

bruce wayne has a heart bruce wayne has a heart bruce wayne-

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wonderlandleighleigh · 1 year

Note

5 times lenny wanted to punch joel + the one time he still didn't but he wanted to punch him even more than normal

(Let me see what I can do here...)

"Whelp. I guess this makes us Eskimo brothers," Joel says, obviously trying to joke.

Lenny's eye just twitches and he takes a long, slow sip of his whiskey.

Lenny finishes up his set and lingers at the bar at the Button Club. Midge is working late at Gordon Ford, so there's not much reason to head home. He sighs and orders another drink.

"Lemme guess," Joel says, leaning over the bar. "Midge has a headache tonight? She used to pull that shit on me all the time."

Lenny's eye twitches, and he turns to the bartender. "Can you please make that a double?"

"I just don't see what the big deal is," Joel admits.

Midge pinches the bridge of her nose. "Ethan punched someone in the face, Joel."

"Kid probably deserved it," Joel argues.

"That's not the point."

"It's good that he knows how to fight!" Joel cries. "God knows Lenny's not gonna teach him."

Lenny's eye twitches and he slips out of the kitchen to go fix both he and Midge a pitcher of martinis to be enjoyed when Joel finally fucking leaves.

"Can I tell you something?" Joel asks him. He's pretty drunk after a full day of fasting an then a big dinner and a lot of wine with said dinner.

"Please don't," Lenny requests.

It doesn't work.

"Even after having having two kids, Midge was still tighter than Penny," Joel admits.

Lenny squeezes both eyes shut. "Moishe, is there any more wine?"

"Still can't believe she picked a fucking junkie over me," Joel mutters under his breath. Obviously he believed that he'd be quiet enough not to be heard.

He was wrong.

Lenny takes a breath and turns to Midge. "I have a joint. You have a fire escape. I say we go make use of both."

She nods. "Lead the way."

And one time he reeeallllyyyy wanted to punch Joel...

It had been a particularly brutal fight. Joel had really let Midge have it, standing there in the foyer of her apartment, kids waiting patiently, though uncomfortably to leave with their father.

"If you're so in love with your fucking comedy job, maybe you shouldn't have the kids anymore," Joel says. "Since they're taking second seat to your shiny career - or hell, third, considering Lenny is always around."

Lenny takes a breath and lets it out slow, as he watches Midge step back. She's hurt, that's clear. And angry, but not quite sure what to do about it, with her children and Lenny standing right there.

"Joel, it's time to go," Lenny says evenly, his calm voice masking his anger.

"You don't get to tell me what to do," Joel snaps.

"Go cool off," Lenny snaps back. "Come back for the kids tomorrow."

"You can't keep me away-"

"No one wants to be around you when you act like an asshole," Lenny cuts him off. "Least of all your small children who have no clue what the hell is going on. No go home."

Joel glowers at Lenny, and then Midge, before turns around and storming out, slamming the door behind him.

Midge jumps, and lets out a breath, giving Lenny a grateful look before going to hug the kids.

Lenny locks the front door.

#fic #au #tmmm #Midge x Lenny #Midge/Lenny #and Joel

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br-uwu-cewayne · 2 years

Text

Was having a BrucexJim chat with @onyxbird and it was just to much fun not to share

OB: So is Jim gonna be like, the first person to have seen everything of Batman EXCEPT his face???

"Identify Batman? No, I have never seen any more of his face than you have!" *conveniently neglects to mention the several hundred identifiable scars.*

Did you ever watch the show Home Improvement? I'm just thinking of Wilson, whose face was never entirely seen due to increasingly contrived circumstances.

Me: Oh my god YES

Bruce realizing A Clue halfway through the day and needing to confer with Gordon but he can't exactly sneak away, slip into the suit, have a three minute conversation, slip out of the suit, and get back to whatever he was doing in the middle of the day, so it's just...

A) increasingly contrived comical situations to speak to him without being seen, and/or

B) increasingly sexually charged situations where he just slips into an obscured space or dim lighting right behind him, fully unmasked uncowled unsuited, vulnerable, and does the low growly "don't turn around," right in his ear before Jim can fully register the warm presence settling against his back. And Jim immediately knows the man is uncowled because that little hint of digital distortion isn't in the voice and every single time it happens it just smacks him with the realization (and fear) that Batman trusts him so goddamn much.

#gcpdilf #BrucexJim #batman #bruce wayne #jim gordon #batgordon

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waitineedaname · 2 years

Note

21. W/ Benrey and Gordon (or Dr. Coomer and Bubby, doesn't really matter)

I kinda remixed your request, but it turned out really funny imo so hopefully that's okay!

prompts here

“You!”

Benrey lifted his head up from where it was dangling half off the couch to look at Gordon, who had just stomped into the living room in a fit of frustration. That seemed like pretty typical Gordon behavior to Benrey, so he responded in his own typical fashion. “Huh?” He said, face blank.

“It was you!” Gordon pointed an accusational finger at Benrey, giving him absolutely nothing else to go on. Benrey had no clue what was going on, so he gave Gordon a broad grin and spread his arms, letting his Playstation controller fall to the ground in the process.

“It was me!” He declared, hoping that was the right answer.

“Of course it was. Of course. Only you would do some freak shit like this.” Gordon stormed over to him and tried to look intimidating. Benrey didn’t bother to make himself any less boneless on the couch. “I just have one question, and I’m begging you to give me a straight answer because I am wracking my fucking brains trying to figure this out. Why? Why did you do it?”

“Uh.” Benrey still had no idea what he was being accused of, so he went through his normal list of rationale to figure out what kind of response Gordon was expecting. “Because I’m so cool?” Gordon’s scowl deepened like his eyebrows were trying to tie themselves into a knot, so that probably wasn’t right. Benrey tried again. “Because you’re so sucks?”

“None of that explains why you’d take a bite out of a stick of butter, Benrey!”

Benrey recoiled, only just barely managing to pull himself into an upright sitting position before he fell off the couch entirely. “Eugh! What?”

“That’s what I’m asking!” Gordon threw his hands in the air, exasperated. “Why did you do it?”

“I didn’t do it! That’s fucking nasty, bro!”

“What? Of course you did!” Gordon clearly hadn’t been prepared for that response, but he wasn’t buying it. “Who else would do something weird like that?”

“I dunno!” It was Benrey’s turn to point at Gordon in accusation. “Maybe it was you! Huh? Maybe you did it, Mayonnaise Boy.”

“Why would I do it?!”

“Because you eat gross shit. Like mayonnaise.”

“Dude, there is a world of difference between putting mayo on sandwiches and taking a bite out of a fucking stick of butter!”

“A likely story.” Benrey fixed him with his best “security guard who knows you pulled some bullshit” glare. “You’re just trying to lead me off the scent. Tryna, tryna red herring me? Is that it? Trying to act like you’re not some kinda butter monster?”

“I’m not! I think that’s what you’re doing!” Gordon poked a finger into Benrey’s chest in a manner that was, quite frankly, rude.

Before their argument could devolve even further, Dr. Coomer strolled into the room. “Ah! Hello, gentlemen! What seems to be the cause of the ruckus?”

“Benrey here won’t own up to taking a bite out of my butter!” Gordon said, like a child snitching on their sibling to their parents.

“Ah, that reminds me!” Coomer smiled. “Thank you for leaving such a delicious buttery snack in your refrigerator, Gordon!”

There was a long moment of silence as both Gordon and Benrey stared at Coomer, whose smile did not falter. Eventually, Benrey was the one to break the silence, just barely muffling a laugh in his hand. “Oh my god,” He muttered, still laughing softly.

“Dr. Coomer,” Gordon spoke very slowly, as if scared what the answer might be, “Did you take a bite out of the butter in the fridge?”

“Yes! I do love a good old Log Of Butter as an afternoon snack. Though, Gordon, you should probably invest in the unsalted variety. It will be better for you in the long run!” Dr. Coomer’s poker face was impeccable, though his mustache twitched with the hint of humor when that made Benrey laugh so hard he finally fell off the couch entirely.

“Coomer,” Gordon repeated, horrified. “Why?”

“Gordon. I was hungry.”

#hlvrai #gordon feetman #benrey #dr. coomer #my writing #okay to reblog #coomer making benrey laugh always brings me joy #so damn if I won't try to write it as often as possible #gordon likes to act like benrey is the weirdest one in their group #but that's because he's blind to dr coomer's absolutely bizarre behavior #this is why I like to say benrey is like a son to coomer lmao #coomer and benrey friendship is underrated because they're both weird as hell and the most aware they're in a game and use sweet voice #and also coomer made benrey break character and laugh multiple times #in this essay I will-#(actually i did write more coomer and benrey friendship at one point. check out my fic atom by atom. it's sad)#anyway. enjoy this fic! it was extremely fun to write

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devilfic · 2 years

Note

It's me, cain! Since your last fic (as of the moment i'm writing this) is about stranger things (which is somehow "inspired" by the ask i sent and it makes me feel like i requested it), then i want to officially request something different. I still have ideas for stranger things, but for now... may i request a continuation of boogeyman???

❝boogeyman❞

II. no god in gotham.

parts: previously. plot: your shadow has a task for you. it's best you accept it. pairing: edward nashton x gn!reader. cw: detective!reader, dark, religious themes, use of handguns, murder, slight dumbification, conversations between law enforcement that should reasonably have them put in prison, non-graphic allusions to child abuse. words: 3.9k.

a/n: of course!! we get some further lore for the reader and a new hairstyle for edward.

When you were just starting out, the GCPD had put a gun in your hands and asked you to just hit your target. It was a fact of life in Gotham that most citizens had at least held a gun by fifteen, if not shot one, but you were a special case. You’d held a gun before. Held a gun and threatened to shoot, even, but you’d never pulled the trigger. Your fellow recruits called you “soft”. Soft was a word you could shake off anywhere else but here.

You spent hours training, impatient, wondering what you were doing wrong. That’s when you first met the man who’d change your life for the worse, “You ever killed somebody?”

Anywhere else, one might’ve balked. Another fact of life in Gotham was that if you lived long enough, you’d have some blood on your hands, “No, sir.”

Instead of calling you soft, he smiled—Lieutenant Dwyer, his nameplate boasted—and pointed at the poor target you’d been abusing all night. Then, without mincing words, patted your shoulder and asked you, “But you’ve wanted to, right?” Someone in your position couldn’t say “yes” and get away with that, could they? It had to be a test. Dwyer didn’t mind your silence, “It’s a bit easier to aim if you have someone in mind.”

“Isn’t that... dangerous?” You’d skirted around the word “immoral”, “In the field, I mean. If you’re thinking about a specific person. You could end up profiling.”

“Of course. In the field. But you just need to pass this test, right? Then you’re in? So do what you have to to get in.”

Why he cared that you pass when there were far better recruits he didn’t need to waste breath on was beyond you back then. Why he congratulated you, personally, when you did pass, you had no clue. Why he had taken you under his wing and ruined your life... you found out eventually, at least.

"I think you should take me off this case, Chief."

In all your years of knowing Chief Bock, of two things were you certain: one, you didn't make demands of the man. And two, you didn't question his authority. You'd effectively done both in the time it took for you to walk from the front door to his desk. It's only because it's you that he humors you, wiping his lip of coffee and giving you the floor, "You got a life-threatening disease I should know about, detective?"

Someone is going to die, "It's just getting a little crowded." Bock's face tells you that was the wrong thing to say.

You felt like a child. Bock, your "parent", insisting you were the very best on the force. Gordon, his "parent", indignant that the Bat could be trusted beyond the system. Both with their hands on yours and Batman's shoulders, shoving you two into the spotlight and saying "Look! Look how much better this one can be."

It always ended up with you and Batman in the middle. Your only solace was that he seemed to hate it as much as you did. "Did Gordon bully you into this? Huh? Five years ago and you'd have been singing a different tune."

Five years ago, you were still honest. "No, sir. But it's obvious what you're doing. Batman solves one too many crimes and suddenly people are questioning the GCPD's competence," Bock snarls at that, "so you put me on the scene. All it's doing is taking away from the work."

"I put you there because you're smart."

"With all due respect, sir, you put me there because you can't take him out. Because no one wants him out."

And it was true. With every public takedown of another crazed villain, Batman shot higher and higher up the popularity polls. Questions had steered from "Is the Batman a threat?" to "Who's the Batman's next threat?". He was a celebrity, and while there were still plenty who opposed him, the tides were changing.

To remove Batman from a case was like dooming it to fail.

Bock stews in his anger, clearly caught in a trap. It helped that you were one of the few who had yet to pick a side between the Bat's fans and adversaries. At the very least, you could see the situation for what it was. "Do you not want this?" Bock demands, finally.

"Of course I want this."

"But you wanna leave it to the vigilante and run off with your tail between your legs?"

It would be easier for you to agree with that. Let him think you a coward and save yourself the stress. "I just... I want to know why I'm still here. Why you believe that I have something to offer that the Batman doesn’t. And don’t say a badge."

Bock grinds his teeth behind his pursed mouth. You’d like to think it was because that’s exactly what he was going to say. He takes his time coming up with something else, "I trusted Lieutenant Dwyer. I trusted Detective Kenzie. I trusted every goddamn man I put on this force. And then I wake up one morning and... Dwyer's dangling over the harbor and I find out he's been putting bullets in skulls for hush money. And you," Chief Bock's scornful finger points your way, "standing there on that same harbor. You two used to be attached at the hip. Couldn't figure out for the life of me why you weren't hanging right there with him."

You both had that in common. It probably kept you up at night more than it did him.

He continues, "But then I thought about it, about all of it. If you were someone I couldn't trust, that psycho would've made sure of it. And yet you're here. Truth is, you've always been a good kid. I'd rather you on this case more than anybody else. I don't say that lightly."

It twists your gut, his earnest eyes. You can't look at him when you know the truth. "...Thank you, sir. I'll... think about it."

When it was time to pull the trigger in the field for the first time, your bullet had missed. It went flying off somewhere into the smog, flung too high too quickly to hit much more than a passing bird. Briefly, you’d wished that they’d get away.

Another bullet flew through the air shortly after yours and the suspect fell to the ground, dead. Your partner had taken the shot that time. They hadn’t held it against you.

“Did you do what I told you to?” Dwyer sipped absently at his coffee, not bothering to look you in your pitiful eyes.

“I... I couldn’t.”

“Hm. You may not be so lucky next time.”

The Batman is a big man. It’s probably all the Kevlar and armor and the pointy ears of his cowl that make him seem enormous, or at least that’s what you keep telling yourself as you stand by his side. The corridors are too small for him, cops weaseling past the two of you even as you press your heels against the wall. The Batman isn’t as accommodating, simply watching them struggle by.

With Bock and Gordon in a screaming match behind the chief’s office door, you supposed he had nothing better to do than strike up a conversation, “I’m sorry if I scared you.”

“You don’t scare me,” you probably aren’t helping your case with the wounded rabbit look on your face, “where’s this coming from?”

Batman clears his throat, keeping his face turned forward. He almost looks... embarrassed. “The other night. When I drove you home.” Your confusion only grows. “I don’t want you to think I was trying to intimidate you off the case.”

Your first instinct is to laugh. Then, you roll your eyes. You could hazard a guess as to who put that thought in his mind, “Did Bock say that to you?”

“He insinuated it.”

“I was thinking about leaving, but not because of that.” Batman stares down at you, asking with his eyes. “I just figured you’d have the case covered. Seeing as you’ve got experience with... him and all.”

Referring to him as him and not your shadow, the ever present demon jerking you around by the strings, felt just as wrong as saying his real name. “We don’t know if it’s him yet.”

“But it probably is, right?”

It wasn’t like he was dead. It wasn’t like the GCPD didn’t still have a warrant out for his arrest. He was very much still a wanted man.

When the floods had broken out that night, no one could be blamed for thinking of themselves. Those who were lucky enough to live above sea level sheltered in place, wondering when help would come and if they’d be locked in for days without food or electricity. Those who weren’t had their bodies flushed out with the draining of the city. Worries went to jobs, possessions, families and friends. Why would anyone be thinking about Arkham’s finest breaking out in the chaos? Those worries didn’t come until after.

Some hoped they all drowned in their escape. Others hoped they’d leave Gotham and never come back. Others, like you, knew they lied in wait. The floods weren’t bad for everybody.

The Batman had sworn to find them before they could cause any more harm, but then the Riddler had showed up in the dark of your bedroom and the rest was history.

“When I talked to him in Arkham, Edward was... smart. Meticulous. All his plans were like he’d laid out the chessboard and the pieces moved themselves. I was one of them,” The Batman gets this far off look in his eyes, shame mixed in the pits of blue, “everything down to the T had his signature. The councilman’s murder is familiar, but not exact. Something’s wrong with it.”

Your breath is stilted, uneven. You’d had your doubts that he knew who was hiding in your shadow, but asking him would give it weight. You had to be careful, “Because there was no riddle?”

“A man that proud of his work and he doesn’t sign off on it? Something’s changed.”

A lump begins to form in your throat. Gordon and Bock are still tearing into each other mere feet away. You feared your heart beat loud enough for them to hear it.

You don’t mean for your eyes to wander off but the Batman doesn’t seem to mind. He takes to surveying the area again, always on the lookout. You wonder through your mounting anxiety if anything ever truly flies under his radar. It only solidified to you how little you could compare. How close you were to being caught.

It’s a miracle when Gordon throws open the door, panting, and ushers the two of you inside.

Bock is at his desk having shifted from glaring down Gordon to glaring down your caped companion. The Batman, again, doesn’t seem to mind. You wonder what all that screaming could’ve accomplished when Gordon speaks up from the other side of you, “We’ve been getting letters taking credit for the murder.”

The chief drags a sack onto his desk and out spills about a hundred different envelopes, all different sizes and colors, all different addressees. One clearly says “To the Batman”, another “To the GCPD”, and another “To GOTHAM”. Most of them are for the Bat, but all of them are a clear imitation of one another. Their inspiration was not far off in distant memory.

You watch as the Batman takes one addressed to him and peels the flap up to retrieve the card inside. It’s a cheap greeting card. Just like- “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away,” he thumbs it open, revealing an unruly script inside, barely legible even as the three of you gather ‘round to read it, “the Lord punishes and the Lord rewards. Who’s side are you on?”

Your stomach is doing flips. Bock looks annoyed, clearly frustrated with the turn of events. Gordon looks unsettled. The Batman... his mind is working. “You religious, Bat?” The chief mocks. “I’m starting to think there is no God in Gotham.”

There’s still a church to pray to him.

It’s changed a bit since the bombing. You remembered seeing the Batman blown across the room with the detonation of the bomb, wondering if that would be the end of him. How hadn’t it killed him? How hadn’t it unmasked him, cracking his cowl (and skull) in two? He was lucky. More lucky than the man whose brains were splattered all over his suit.

There were metal detectors out front now. Ugly, modern things that clashed against the cathedral’s ornate bones. They were ugly but necessary. You’d read the impassioned editorials on this godless city, your city, and how it was all the citizens’ faults for not believing in a higher power. For trusting in a false god to cleanse the city of its evil.

His black head turns toward you as you approach his pew.

Riddler rarely went out these days. When he did, he was skulking along the worst parts of the city where people would sooner run in the other direction than call the cops. His friends in the underground kept him safe enough, but when he needed to be in public, he took to changing his face. He wasn’t very proficient with a makeup brush and concealer, but it changed enough of him that no one really looked long.

It had startled you the first time you saw him like that. It made you finally call him by his name, “Why here?”

He had your apartment. Free reign of it, in fact. He had the dark alleyways. He even had the Penguin’s new and improved Iceberg Lounge if needed (as thanks for putting him on top of Gotham and Falcone beneath it). Why the church he sung in as a little boy? The church he killed a man in under the eyes of heaven?

“I thought a change of scenery would be nice,” he smiles, broad and unsettling as always, “and I wanted to see if they’d let me in. Please. Sit.”

His hair had grown significantly since the floods. With it dyed black now, he really did look like an entirely different person. Without the coke-bottle lenses taking up half his face, you really got to see more of him. New parts of him.

You take the seat he allots you at the very end of the pew and he immediately scoots closer until you’re sandwiched between his thigh and the arm rest. His proximity at home- in your home was nothing new, but in public? Where a stray priest might see? You squirm, focusing now on the papers folded in his hands. “What are those?”

Riddler... no, Edward, turns his face toward you with a closed-lipped grin and hands you the papers.

Most of them are old prints of the front page news. The dates range from the 80′s to the 90′s, some bleeding into the new millennium. The only thing any of them had in common was the same white, wrinkly face printed black and white on every page. You had to live under a rock not to know who this guy was. “Scott Winthrop?”

Edward crosses an arm over you to highlight a headline you’d skimmed over, “Gotham old money. Older than the city, practically. They came over from down south.”

“What about him?”

Your eyes meet Edward’s in the breath’s distance between you both. “He’s got a dirty history, detective. Generations worth. You know how I know him?” Your head twists to make sure no one might be sneaking up on you, “He used to come here every Sunday. In this very pew. He visited the orphanage too. Donated a couple blankets one winter. We all fought over them.”

“So what’d he do to you?”

“Nothing to me. I wasn’t his... type.”

Your head spins the moment you get it. You’d seen this man on TV. He’d donated to charities for years. He owned a portion of the city. He owned the block you live on. “What... did nobody try to stop him?”

“He donated shoes, too.” Your revulsion is harder to hide up close, as is the furrow in the middle of his forehead, “Of course we did. We were kids. But he paid very good money, detective. He only stopped coming ‘cause his wife caught him. Well... that, and I burned the place to the ground.”

“And you want...” Your breath shudders. The guy was too rich of a target, wasn’t he? He had to be hiding behind layers of security to rival Arkham. Bruce Wayne had been one in a million. There was no way he’d get that chance again. “How?”

Edward’s shoulder pushes into you as he shifts, hand reaching into his back pocket for something. A phone. It was his burner gifted to him by the Penguin himself. He flips it open and shows you a text on the screen.

Saturday. I scratch your back, you scratch mine.

- O

No doubt “O” was Oswald Cobblepot. “What’s Saturday?”

“A celebration,” a sparkle lights up in Edward’s eyes; you’d think he was a boy in the candy store, “the old man’s turning the big seven-zero. And I have an invitation to the party.”

“How in the hell-”

“People will pay anything to not think for themselves. My sponsor is very generous.”

“So you want to do it at the party? Even with an invitation, you’re not getting close to the guy. Let alone close enough to... dress him up. I know you hate the guy and I don’t blame you but you’re crazy if you think that we can-”

Your teeth clash together with the force of his hand gripping your jaw. His big, spindly fingers hold your cheeks close together, bruising the soft flesh of your face until you’re only inches away from his face. There’s a hard look in his eyes. You tuck your chin as close to your chest as he’ll let you, hoping not to alert the scattered devotees throughout the room. “I’m not stupid, detective. Let’s stop pretending like you’re the one who thinks for the two of us, hm?”

Naturally, you nod. His fingers cup your jaw instead of clenching it now. Once upon a time, you would have never let someone put their hands on you like this. “You just need to trust me. I promised to keep your secret. So trust me.”

You could’ve laughed if you weren’t certain it would end badly, “Do you trust me?”

Edward laughs for you, practically cackling and drawing the attention of those nearby. His hand drops as soon as their eyes turn your way. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” You could strangle him. “Oh, and don’t worry about how you’ll get in. If your precious GCPD is as diligent as you say they are, they’ll make room for you at the party.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve already sent word ahead. You’ll find out soon enough.” The furrow in Edward’s brow smooths over then, his face returning to calm. He was in control again.

He glances quickly at his phone once more and takes the papers back from you, folding them into the pocket of his rain coat. You always felt this dread every time he left. You didn’t know when, or how, but he’d pop right back up in your life again and you’d be right back to where you were before. Anxious. Exposed. Dragged by the scruff and forced to keep up appearances until he left again.

Part of you wanted to always see him. To keep an eye on him. At least so it’d come as less of a fright. But you knew where he was. He was your shadow, never too far behind. Even if it scared you sometimes, deep down, you knew it was always there.

Edward rises on his long legs and scoots past you into the aisle. The words come out before you can stop them, “Will I see you before the party?”

He blinks a few times—a consequence of the contacts he wasn’t used to wearing. The faux freckles dotted along the bridge of his nose stretch underneath his smile.

Seeing him coming doesn’t stop you from flinching when his hand touches your cheek again. The heel of his palm presses into the side of your mouth while his fingers curl toward your nape.

He pats your cheek twice and leaves you there.

“I didn’t know you had a daughter.”

Dwyer startles at the sound of your voice. You’re smart enough not to touch the picture frame in case it might be overstepping, instead keeping a finger pointed in it’s direction. It’s a beautiful picture. You could tell it was taken on one of Gotham’s atypical sunny days.

A host of emotions cross his face, but the most prominent is foreign to you. Pride. Your parents hadn’t had much of that for you. “I did,” the sorrow, though, was familiar, “she was killed when she was fifteen.”

“Oh. I’m sorry.” Your hand drops to your side.

One look at your face and he goes back to cleaning the action of his gun. “It’s alright. I got the motherfucker. You gonna finish your coffee?”

You’re just leaving the church when the shrill of your ringtone bounces off the walls. You quickly grab the belting thing and answer before anyone could say anything, shuffling out into the light drizzle, “Hello?”

You’re surprised to hear Gordon’s voice on the other line. His number in your phone was starting to be more ornamental than useful, “You might wanna get down to the precinct soon. We think we might have found something.”

“Did something come up?”

“A card, actually. The Bat noticed it in the pile of... letters the Riddler’s fans left. It’s the only one with anything concrete to it.”

“A clue?” A riddle, you mean to say. You hug your coat tighter to yourself and get as close to the road as you can without getting splashed by the cars that race by.

“Yeah... and an address.” So that was the word. You hiss through your teeth and shake your hand in the air, cursing each taxi that speeds right past you. “You think you can get here in the next ten minutes? Chief wants to go over our next move.”

Might be twenty, you want to growl. Since when did anyone in Gotham turn their nose up at a little extra cash in their pockets? It was like you were a ghost.

Just as you’re about to give up and start down where you’d come from on foot, a bike’s roar makes the concrete under your shoes shake and tremor. You hear it before you see it pull up in front of you, careful to slow down before your legs could get splashed with the city’s toxic rainwater.

The Bat is a welcome sight up until you realize that you hadn’t told anyone where you’d be going when Riddler had texted you to meet him.

Gordon’s distant voice calls through your phone. Batman explains, giving nothing away. “I thought this would be quicker.”

Was he watching? Did he know? Had your shadow really left, or was he pushed up between two buildings, watching you? Egging you on? Begging you to take this chance. You’re smart, but the line between reality and your reality blurred everyday.

Gordon calls your name again and you quickly recover, choking out, “I’ll be there in five.”

taglist: @yikes-buddy

#edward nashton x reader #edward nashton scenarios #edward nashton imagine #edward nashton #riddler x reader #riddler scenarios #riddler imagine #the riddler #paul dano riddler #the batman x reader #the batman scenarios #the batman #mjwrites

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cleoselene · 4 months

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youtube

okay so this is a 4.5 hour Twin Peaks theory video lol and I watched the whole thing and I have OPINIONS on it and literally no one to talk to about it, because I don't know anyone who has even watched all of TP let alone a 4.5 hour video on it, so time to shout into the void of tumblr

I have never ever watched a youtube video this long so it's a testament to this dude for actually holding my attention? I'll start out nice because the time went quickly, it was presented well, and I wasn't bored at any point. It was coherent and I can tell he's done some time in academia because he's really really diligent about driving home his thesis, over and over and OVER again, probably too much, but it screamed academically trained how intense he was about his thesis. I do think some of his observations are very strong: Mike saying "I mean things like they are, like they sound" being a nice big clue is a good one. Gordon Cole literally being THE DIRECTOR and being played by David Lynch.

But oh my god, lol, what the fuck at him opening the video being like OKAY NOT JUST SPOILERS BUT THIS THEORY IS SO CORRECT IT WILL RUIN YOUR ENJOYMENT OF HTIS SHOW. Like, dude, no, have some humility. Also, him declaring he's going to completely ignore all the contributions of Mark Frost is... a Choice, because David Lynch himself literally says Mark Frost is 50% of the creative force. You can't just ignore half of the creative team because it doesn't suit your thesis.

Not just that, this guy has little to say about The Return. The Return is 18 episodes. Lynch FOUGHT for it to be 18 episodes and not 9. I get that he feels his theory holds with just the first two seasons and FWWM, but why would Lynch push as hard as he did for another 9 hours of television if his message was already covered in S1/2 and FWWM? And when he does make connections with The Return, they are... really not as strong. Like, it's obvious he had a long time to marinate on this theory for the older content, and The Return, not so much.

I also don't think Twin Peaks (or any longform expansive piece of art) has such a neat and tidy theory (hilarious, I know to call it neat and tidy when it's a 4.5 hour video, but it' actually is very simple, he just uses a lot of examples). Longform art like this touches on a lot of ideas and themes and concepts and isn't so basic. Like, anyone who has done any kind of longform creating would know this, because it would be BORING to make a project this long and ongoing with just one concept being driven home and over and over and over again. Artists like to repeat themselves but not THAT much. There's a lot more richness to the text than this theory gives it credit for, I think

Still, there are a lot of good ideas here, but they are often reduced to fit the sort of cypher that the theorist wants to fit, and I think that's sort of a shame!

And I'm trying to be nicer on the internet so I'll just say he should have not done the David Lynch impression and leave it at that >_>

#twin peaks #long post #Youtube

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jackalsprey · 1 year

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The 516 Unit (May make this a series)

UM. So...

I may have been digging around @asktrio516's old posts recently, and I discovered an old AU of hers...a Detective AU... and NOW I'VE WRITTEN SOMETHING FOR IT. With headcanons of my own for the characters she didn't mention in that post. EMMA I AM SO SORRY. (And I have another post lined up that involves her ocs... sigh. I am so sorry Emma.)

Anyways - DETECTIVE AU! Not much happens here, I want to save the action for later installments, this is mostly a slice of life depicting the actual relationships and dynamics of the unit.

Oh for quick reference - ages!

Thomas: 24 -Edward: 56 - Henry: 28 (don't ask why I make him and Hiro so young XD) - Gordon: 42 - James: 38 - Percy: 22 - Toby: 53 - Duck: 31 - Donnie and Douglas: 34 - Oliver: 32 - Emily: 27 - Rosie: 23 - Hiro: 30 (not all of them are here, but if I make this a series, then they will be)

Sodor. A small, lush green island off the coast of England, filled with beautiful valleys, towering mountains, and quaint classical towns. It's a vacation hotspot and a thriving business center.

This also means its' crime rate is massive. The local gang, nicknamed the "Diesels" because of their habit of leaving oil on each of the places or people they've robbed, hit all over the island on a regular basis. And that means a cop force has to be in place to stop them.

And luckily for Sodor, they've got some of the best in the UK: The 516 unit. These brave men and women head out into the streets on the daily, ready to kick ass, save the day, and risk their lives to be the heroes the island needs.

Unfortunately, most of them also happen to be idiots, as demonstrated by Detective Montague "Duck" Pannier, and his partner and cousin, Oliver Swindon.

"Oliver, that is disgusting and should not be allowed by God. In fact, I have a sneaking suspicion you'll be struck down by him in the next thirty seconds."

Oliver sighed, continuing to stir honey into his mocha latte. The two detectives stood in the unit's walk-in kitchen, it was an ungodly hour of the morning, and frankly, he had neither the time nor the patience for his cousin's bullshit.

"Duck, frankly, I don't give a damn. You be boring over there with your tea and leave me alone."

The blond pinched the bridge of his nose. "There are two ways of doing things, Oliver. The Great Western Way-"

"And the wrong way, I know, I know. And from where I'm sitting..." Oliver cocked his eyebrow. "You're doing it the wrong way."

Before Duck could respond by cracking his mug over his cousin's head (it was his favorite whale mug), the bickering was interrupted by the stern voice of one Gordon Gresley - the 6'2 wall of lean muscle they called their unit chief. Always clad in a blue suit and a pipe in his mouth, his salt and pepper hair neatly brushed, no one tried to piss the chief off unless they had a death wish. Especially not this early in the morning.

"Gentlemen," he sighed.

Oliver snapped to attention, while Duck simply turned around and leaned against the counter, sipping from his mug unconcernedly. "Chief Gresley, sir! What can we do for you?"

"Stop blocking the fridge, for a start," he grumbled. "Don't keep a man from his breakfast."

Oliver scrambled out of the way, while Gordon yanked open their beaten-up fridge and pulled out a carton of vanilla yogurt and some milk. He firmly believed in the idea of keeping as much calcium in your body as possible. The last thing he needed was for his officers to get broken bones. Popping the lid off, he made the rare choice to make small talk - about work, of course.

"Have you seen any of the others so far today?" He asked his detective duo. "I haven't heard anyone come in besides you two."

Duck shrugged, gesturing out to the maze of cubicles behind the door his chief had just walked through. "I saw Edward head downstairs to the analog systems. No clue why he loves those old things so much. Haven't seen anyone else so far."

Oliver scratched his neck. "The twins should be here soon. Douglas is just picking Donald up."

"Oh, of course you know just where Douggie is," Duck teased, wiggling his eyebrows and dodging the fist aimed at his ear.

Sighing, Oliver continued. "And I think the rookies are on their way as well, sir."

"Eager kids," Gordon commented, gulping down some milk and putting the carton back. "They piss me off, but they'll be good. Eventually."

The rookies in question were Rosita "Rosie" Davenport, Thomas Awdry, and Percy Wickham. They were all recent graduates of the police academy and had been serving in the unit for only a few months respectively. Thomas and Percy in particular were described as the "little shit nuggets" by the Scottish Twins, and had issues with following orders. Rosie at least was good at listening and could be trusted to not do anything stupid... most of the time.

Duck finished his tea with a sigh and put the mug in the sink. "Well, I'm off to work on the Diseasel case. You coming, Oliver?"

"Gimme a minute, gotta finish the coffee."

"That coffee is an abomination."

"Duck, you son of a-"

"Stop, both of you," Gordon sighed. "God, why can't Edward be around right now..."

=================================

Contrary to what the movies and TV said, most of the police work was paperwork and not charging into warehouses and criminal gang hideouts, though there was still plenty of that involved. Instead, most members of the 516 unit, who had since filed into the office in varying stages of tiredness, sat at their desks, filling out reports, sorting old files, and trying their best to stay awake. That last part was having various levels of success.

Finally, one particular agent couldn't stand it any longer - the Latino ladies man James Hughes. Tall, with wavy black hair that had a couple red streaks in the front, and always in a red leisure suit with black undertones, he looked sexy and he knew it. He stood up, slammed his laptop shut, and shouted at the top of his lungs.

"If we don't get a new case in the next five minutes, I will jump out of the window after breaking it with Gordon's chair!"

"I think we'd all appreciate that, James," Oliver grumbled from his corner. "Jumping out the window, not breaking it and Gordon's chair."

"I don't give a fuck, I'm bored and I'm antsy! Give us a fucking case already!"

Thomas hopped to his feet as well. "I'm with James! Why is today so slow?"

Donald (or was it Douglas?) scoffed. "Ah, the action'll come latter for ye, laddie. Most days, bein a coppa's just this bullshit."

Douglas (or was it Donald?) nodded in agreement with his brother. "Aye. It ain't all shoot-outs and drug busts, lad."

And perfectly on cue, the sires went off, announcing the arrival of a new case. The loudspeakers came up with the voice of their PA, Emily Gallagher, giving them the update.

"Unit 516, I need at least two officers to respond to a 10-33 in Arlesburgh - it appears there has been another Diesel attack. Vandalism and larceny are the accused crimes."

"You were saying, gentlemen?" James cackled, already on his way out the door. "Yo, Thomas! You wanna get some action?"

"Hell yeah!" The younger man fist-pumped and followed him.

"Remember to call for-"

SLAM!

"Back-up..." Gordon finished, sighing heavily.

Just another day at the 516 unit.

======================

JESUS THIS TOOK WAY TOO LONG. Once again, Emma, I am so sorry.

The AU and the designs in mind belong to @asktrio516, of course.

#ttte edward #ttte duck #ttte james #ttte #ttte humanized #ttte donald #ttte au #ttte thomas #ttte human au #ttte henry #ttte hiro #ttte percy #ttte rosie #ttte gordon #ttte toby #ttte oliver #ttte douglas #ttte emily

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mediocre-daydreams · 1 year

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𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐮𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐧: ask me any question/let's play some common tumblr games!

cym as different holidays! 💗

11 holidays for 11 mutuals!

christmas (dec 25) is @sw34terw34ther : i always see you chatting with your mutuals! you seem like the person who hosts the best holiday parties and can make their own seasonal drinks. plus with that voice of yours, i could totally see you going carolling. getting tagged in your posts is like a little christmas present.

new year's day (jan 1) is @sub-text : bro is my fucking favorite. i would clean up bottles with you on new year's day. you're so nice it makes me want to cry. i always get sentimental on new years and your writing makes me so sappy and soft bro. you write with such dedication to detail and i can't get enough of it. when i tell you my entire world reset after reading "the bet," i'm sirius serious.

valentine's day (feb 14) is @fairydxll : thanks for this ask btw! imma be honest i tried to urban dictionary what cym was but i'm hoping i got it right and it's "cast your mutuals." (UD was no help i used tumblr.) anyway, you're pink, sparkly, and precious, and you quite literally sent me a heart. i envison you as just the sweetest person ever.

johnny appleseed day (march 11) is @emmaev : i love this johnny dude. tbh no clue if he's real, but as a kid i read a book about him and it was great plus you make me just as happy as i feel when i'm apple picking. you're so insanely supportive and kind and seem down-to-earth and i think johnny would admire your thoughtfulness.

april fool's day (april 1) is @yourallihave : my tumblr wife, obviously. i appreciate you so much. your blog is bright pink and spunky, seeing your name in my notifs always makes me smile, and you have the rare ability to actually make me laugh from something i read online. not just one of those huffs or snorts, yknow?

may day (may 1) is @prettylestrange : colorful hair, colorful blog, and glowing personality. you're like the epitome of spring. i've only ever seen american may day, but it's always full of floral skirts, flower crowns, and the pole with the ribbons and stuff and if midsommar weren't a horror movie, you'd be the may queen.

national apple strudel day (june 17) is @forourmoons : (*said like timothee chalamet in don't look up*) i fucking love apple struedel just likei fucking love you. i'm your biggest fan. you're so talented and you're so interactive with everyone that it feels like you're the perfect flaky pastry crust gordon ramsey would approve of.

national bagelfest day (july 26) is @vendettaparker : if i have extra time in the morning, i'll sit down and grab a bagel before school. your writing is so indulgent and part of the reason i started writing so thank you very much i love you very much. it actually took me a long time to start liking bagels, but when i tried soft bagels for the first time dear god i ascended discovering your blog literally awakened a new jenny.

world plant milk day (aug 22) is @munsonsreputation : hear me out. i'm very passionate about soymilk, but my adoration for your blog comes close second. the way you write with such a balance of artistry, fourth-wall-defying humor, and an understanding of characters makes you as cool as plant milk imo.

dear diary day (sep 22) is @masivechaos : nobody pulls off dark academia like you do. you remind me of hand-me-down sweaters, scrapbook journals, and chocolate covered coffee beans. you're friendly and courteous and i think anyone would feel comfortable talking to you.

halloween (oct 31) is @omenhel : the whole black and white theme fits the vibe and all, but most importantly you seem like someone bold, lighthearted, and who values trying to stay true to themselves. plus you send me asks and it's like getting trick-or-treaters at my door.

(no th*nksg*v*ng on this blog boooo colonization boooo)

#1.5k celebration #muah #(˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥⋆)#i love my mutuals #there are many more of you #sorry i couldnt squeeze everyone in #love u all tho #📌

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gingkos-eldritch-secret · 7 months

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Fanfiction Commentary and Recommendations: Lex Luthor´s Ascend from Supervillainy to Fatherhood Part VI (chapters 26 to 30)

The Original story by @halfagone can be found here.

The previous parts of the commentaries can be found here:

Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

Part V

Part VII

So, just to begin with: we still continue where the last part cut off. This will include discussions of injury, blood, torture and death. Also, discussions about the morality of killing someone, even in self-defence.

Many good and interesting and also important discussions happen in these following chapters. Which is very, very nice, but also makes for a bit of an emotionally exhausting bit to read. It´s absolutely wonderful, but at the end I lay in my bed and was like 'how. How do I even feel now? What should I feel now? What?' So yeah, be prepared for that.

Now included: Memes and (hopefully) gifs. You´ll see if it worked. As of now I have no clue. And with that: have fun with the commentary :D

○○○••○○•••○○••○○○

So: Dick is still floored by Lex just leaving after admitting that he forgives them for their behaviour. And has the same opinion as me: That he´s a freaking miracle worker. Good for him! He really DOES deserve Alfred´s cookies for this.

And now we get back to the interrogation. I mean. It should be just Gordon doing this, but Batman has been allowed to stay. And knowing how the bat behaves in such scenarios I´m not really sure that that´s a good idea.

A fun fact: the bats are ALL listening in to the conversation. And as I already know how this will go I´ll just say: they´ll be facepalming. A lot. Or will be commiserating with Danny in a way. Because god damn, he kinda verbally eviscerates Bruce. And Bruce freaking deserves it.

I mean, true, Bruce has made it clear that he´s not offering any input. But it´s Bruce. Even if he wanted to, can this man even hold back his opinions and questions?

Jason and Dick hide it out on the roof - more or less in a mix of civilian and vigilante outfits, having their own conversation while listening in.

And listening in they do. I´m not sure that 'What´s one more bad memory in a hospital?' is a wonderful conversation starter, but god damn. It sure sets the mood. You can decide what that mood is, but I´d say a mix between resigned, shifty (if that even is a mood and not a state of being) and exasperated. So Fun mix.

At least Jim doesn´t seem all too happy about the conversation either? Small mercies, I guess.

At least there´s a lawyer present.

(If I´m very wordy in this: blame the mix of melatonin and caffeine that is unique to night shifts. I am VERY giddy right now and that translates weirdly into commentary. It´s weird to write while kind of dancing to a space documentary YouTube video lmao.)

The first question is just. Basic. 'What happened? Begin from the kidnapping'. That was the moment I decided that I needed popcorn. Because with how done Danny seemed from the whole situation to begin with that could only go so well.

So, it begins with Danny beginning at the. Well. Beginning. With him running off and befriending the crazy local lesbians (I love them your honour) and how he spent his time there, how he doubled back after the explosion and the whole Van business happening after that. All the while Jason is still reeling about his relationship with two ex-Villains. But really, should he be so surprised about that? It´s Danny 'i'mma rehabilitate villains' Luthor we´re talking about.

Then he tries to explain why he thinks the Joker targeted him - he brings it back to his connections with said man´s ex and her new girlfriend. Which is understandable. I doubt he knows that he was mistaken as a Robin when he was taken.

And then we get into the nitty gritty. The things that happened after the camera was shot and the stream was ended.

And just oof. There had just been a whole freaking table full of torture instruments. FULL OF THEM. None of them like that revelation.

And of course, Batman interrupts and asks if the camera was shot on purpose. What the fuck man. WHAT THE FUCK. YOU ASK A TRAUMATIZED CHILD IF HE SHOT A CAMERA ON PURPOSE AFTER BEING BOUND AND TORTURED ON A LIFESTREAM? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU????

Danny stays calm. Only just. He explains how he´d meant to get the man in the shoulder or the back to run as far away as possible. How he still managed to get away and knocked out any goons he met on his way. How he found bomb equipment and used it against the bad excuse of a clown when he got too close to a hiding spot. How he´d tried to shoot him in the back and just met his chest instead. How the Joker just LAUGHED and tried to kill him then and there because 'two killers killing each other'. Really. Fuck him.

Jim, bless his soul, just gently prods at what happened next. Which Danny lies about. Says he just tried to drag himself away, but was slow because of the blood loss and the wounds. That Red Hood came soon after that. It´s a good lie. And it´s nearly the truth. But we all know what went on was just a tad more eldritch. Not that he can tell them that. Who´d ever believe it after all? Or react well to that? No one. that´s who.

Now Gordon tells Danny that the goons were all found dead. All of them. Danny … does not take this well. At all. Even the lawyer asks if they should stop for now, but … well. Then they´d have to do it a second time and I highly doubt that would go any better.

And now the million-dollar question. Where did our boy learn how to wield a gun? This is where the bad parenting choices of the Fentons come in. And how they led to Danny and Jazz chasing each other around the house with loaded guns. In a playful way…. Now where is that Danny protection squad. I need a membership.

And of course, Batman asks why they taught their children how to use lethal guns. He´s still not holding himself to the earlier 'promise' of: he´ll stay out of the conversation. I´m still mad at him for that. And I will continue to be mad at him for that.

Go Jason. Own that cringe at the behaviour of your father figure. Though we´ll all agree that the Fenton parents are, in fact, fools.

So, while Danny tells them that he learnt because he had to, that he never liked guns. Which Batman then uses against him with his next question. And Gordon is not happy about THAT either, trying to interrupt. But of course, the great batman just ignores the head of the police force and asks why Danny chose the gun instead of any of the other weapons.

Danny´s just like 'What? Should I have taken a melee weapon? With the joker? How´d I have gotten away that way? It would have been so much harder?'

And Bruce, not understanding or not liking the reasoning is just like 'You could´ve just ran away'

Like. Danny´s right. He´d been trying to do that from the start? Why´d Batman suddenly fault him for this? For self-defence? I repeat myself: WHAT THE FUCK BATMAN?

Now the man is trying to talk Danny into a corner so that he may 'confess' or whatever the hell is going on in his head. Because why ever else would he hide somewhere? If not to just ambush the Joker?

Which is, I think, when Danny gets really fed up and was also the time I was sitting there like

Batman be like 'I just need to know why' and Danny? Has had ENOUGH. Jason may find his eyes creepy at this point. And I do imagine him letting a tiny little bit of his ghostliness slip through. Because all of those accusations? I´d have had enough of that much earlier than Danny.

And that´s when Danny eviscerates Batman. How do you ask? Well. Because he researched. Everything from crime rates to rogue statistics and even looked into the rogues themselves. And the Joker would´ve had the death penalty several times if it was not for his 'plead to insanity'. He´d left behind half a baseball stadium full of bodies. And nothing was ever done? He told about the second Robin´s death and how he enjoyed it. And batman says things about death and playing god by choosing who dies.

And he asks the real questions:

“You talk about how people play god by choosing who dies, but aren’t you playing god by choosing who lives?” Danny sneered; teeth bared. “Who do you go for? The civilian in need or the criminal who caused their suffering? Who’s the priority to you? Who do you chase after first?”

God damn - going right for the metaphorical throat.

He continues. Calling out that bullshit mentality of 'choice', when the Joker still would´ve just gone back to Arkham after killing him when he´d not even wanted to be there in the first place.

Talks about how there´s people who can be reformed. Who can live normal lives again. But that there must be a life for them to get back to and that the Joker had nothing else. He simply had nothing to live for except for his 'jokes'. And even if they´re reformed. They´d have to live with all the people who have heard of their exploits looking at them with scorn.

There´s just so many good points to this conversation, I love it :3

I kind of think that Jason really needed to hear all of this as well if we go by his reaction. Poor man´s been going through the wringer that day.

When Cass and Tim find the corpse, she´s not sure what to think. Should she be upset that Danny has killed? Should she even be upset that it was the Joker in the first place? Sould she be relieved? I think it all depends on the why´s.

In the end. Nearly all of them had killed before. So, what makes Danny all that different?

Meanwhile Bruce is just having big thoughts and would like to be alone for now please. I think what he actually needs is a hot bath with some scented candles. Self-care, my man. It would do you a world of good. Also: introspection. Always good.

But in the meantime, Bruce and Jason talk things out and it´s beautiful. Some parts of it are quite funny - always trying to ease the mood this one. But in the end Bruce is right. He´s not Jason´s therapist, but he´s his father. He just wants him to be well.

And if things have to be talked about for the going well part? It must be done. Even if it very clearly is hard for either of them. But that´s what family is for, is it not? To be there for each other even when things get uncomfortable …

I cried at some parts of the conversation, but Bruce nearly puts his foot in his mouth so many times … like Jason tries to understand, but Bruce doesn´t make it any easier.

They talk about why Bruce feels so tense at Danny being the one to kill the Joker. Why he´s so insistent on Danny. How it shouldn´t have been Danny. But if not Danny, who then?

Jason? Dick? Bruce? Any way has it´s pros and cons. Who´d have been able to live with it? Who´d have come out of it unchanged? Would the Joker even have been able to reform? No. Not in this life. Never in this life.

Jason´s question threw me out the loop a bit because 'Since when do you talk about these things?' is a very justified question xD

Then the talk shifts. Towards Dick, towards the 'golden boy' and how it was originally Jason who gave his older brother that title. Not Bruce or anyone else. And how Jason has always been the favourite.

Jason predictably doesn´t believe that. Which is of course his right, but it made me just so freaking happy? How he disbelievingly tried to make any of his other siblings into the favourite while Bruce just explains that no. The child who´d so earnestly tried to do well in school, who did his homework without asking, who was excited to stay with him, who didn´t leave freaking scars (and god damn Dick you feral child) and who didn´t fake an uncle so that he´d not be adopted.

And Bruce? Just says that he´d never be mad at Jason because he tried to steal the cars of the Batmobile because it gave him Jason in the end. And that really let me tear up a bit there. Cause that´s just so wholesome? My poor little heart.

Then the impossible actually happens: Bruce apologizes. He actually apologizes. That he´s sorry to make think he was never loved, but that he´s his son and it never should have been thought to have been otherwise. That it never changed to begin with. That he loves him now and god damn I´m a puddle on the floor now. I died of family feels my friends. Bury me shallow though. I have the feeling I´ll be back.

After Danny is released from the hospital, him and Lex go to a Diner for some food and conversation. And let´s just say Lex would like to have a TALK with Bruce Wayne still.

He´s also very happy about Danny´s healing factor as that means his boy will be pain free much sooner than he´d be if he´d been human… well if he´d been completely and utterly human he´d probably be dead because he would´ve taken a much longer time escaping his bonds … anyways

Though this also lets Lex think about how Danny had explained his healing factor. How it´s emotion-bound. And how sometimes when the emotions are right and good, he´ll heal, but when he feels bad or if the wound had emotional damage attached it would heal slower or even leave scars. Though the latter would only happen if the psychological damage went over a certain threshold.

And because he´s a dad he won´t beat long around the bush and tells him about his talk with Dick, about how he knows he collapsed after seeing Jason and if he knew why that was and then they talk about cores. And how the 'parasite' may not have had one, but it had certainly reacted to the proximity to one.

Soon after Lex goes outside to talk with Bruce. Bruce apologizes directly to lex - noice. He really needed to do that in person, otherwise it´d have been quite insincere.

Lex compliments Bruce in how his children care for him. How they certainly do care for him, because otherwise? They wouldn´t even bother.

Lex still warns Bruce that he´ll it slide this once and that if it ever happens again? There´ll certainly be hell to raise. Which is quite understandable. If my child had faced what Danny has faced I would not in any way be calm either. In fact, I´d be furious. So, the little warning is certainly appreciated.

While Bruce is surprised by how well Danny already looks since he´s only been out of the hospital for a few hours, he wants to apologize to Danny. And the little shit? Just says 'I´m waiting'.

Honestly, this man xD

Bruce actually, really, honestly apologizes with a whole explanation of why they did that how he´s also sorry that they did not take his trauma response seriously. He´s also understandably confused when Danny asks if he´d taken a blood sample.

And when Danny emphatically asks if he´d tried? Well. Let´s just say that a little of the eldritch energy slipped through and Bruce got a whole lot more attentive. Danny can be creepy. As a treat.

And when Bruce says 'yes`? And sees the reactions has to that? He realizes that Danny´s afraid. Honest to god afraid even though this could not be as bad as his confrontation with the ex-clown. He also doesn´t know how to feel when Danny warns him about trying it again.

Though here I´ll have to throw something in. Bruce may not have gotten a sample. But do you remember that Danny´s been tortured? With knives? And that there´d understandably been blood from his wounds all around the warehouse? And that the hospital probably also had some of his blood from the bullet removal as well as the cleaning of the other wounds? Let´s just say it will come into play later. I completely forgot about the left in my first read but god damn. This just makes the situation so much worse. But first it´ll get better. I swear this is like a roller coaster ride of emotions.

Where were we? Ah yes. Danny asks about the parasite. And if they´d taken it into the Batcave. Bruce is. Not amused. The first question out of his mouth was 'how' and the second was 'did you tell lex Luthor'

Dannys reaction´s just a wrinkled nose like 'ew, why would I do that?'. Which is honestly kind of adorable. And Danny does this whole spiel about secret identities and how they´re not his to tell and that he´s not exactly following lex´ agenda at all.

And after that rant Bruce just focuses on the word 'parasite' like a confused puppy. Danny´s just like 'yes. It´s a parasite. No, I don´t know how he got it' *thinks about ectoplasm* … 'was it a green liquid’ the instant reaction of 'LAZARUS PIT KNOWLEDGE' is funny as frick if you ask just always me. He just always assumes things first before he asks. Let me remind you peeps: To assume makes an ass out of u and me.

And then Danny explains how his parents used to work with 'something like that' and that it´s the reason his blood probably wouldn’t even ping as human because of all the contamination.

As Bruce asks if that´s the reason he´s so shifty about his blood samples Danny´s just like 'Nah. I just don´t trust you with this sort of information. Someone would get it and then they´d just use it maliciously. I KNOW that. Already lived through that'

Then this heartbreaking part follows:

There was only this soft, sad expression on Danny’s face as the boy said, “Oh, Bruce… There is no fixing me.” And then, Danny looked away, gaze falling to the half-eaten plate now. “Not anymore, anyways. Had someone tried a decade earlier, maybe it would have worked out but… No one bothered to try when I was still worth saving.”

I just want to put him in a blanket burrito and hug him until he´s happy and safe and no one will harm him anymore …

Bruce wants to talk about that topic further, but Danny just deflects back to the parasite. He talks about ectoplasm! Achievement unlocked! Knowledge about ectoplasm gained! Congratulations!

Bruce is fascinated. Danny is horrified that Jason was basically put into extremely unhealthy sludge that´s just a very bad representation for Ectoplasm. He´s not surprised about the side effects it had though. Which. If you think about it. I wouldn´t be either. I mean that stuff runs on emotions. And you can´t tell me that the League of Assassins has many positive emotions. Especially around the pits.

And then everyone´s just horrified that the parasite is sentient. Not as horrified that it´s not sapient. Can you imagine a green sludge parasite being sapient? God that sounds like some horror movie stuff.

Now the million-dollar question: Why isn´t Danny as affected by the whole thing? Easy answer? Because he´s been surrounded by that stuff since before he´s been born. It´s integrated in his DNA. Of course, it won´t affect him the same. And of course, there´s no fixing him. But his parents never did realize, did they? They never did understand what they´d been doing to their own flesh and blood. But their work was more important in the end, I guess.

And then we´re back with a mixed bag and some sadder emotions as the talk swaps to Danny´s parents and then to Lex and the situation at the hospital and Damian´s reaction and Danny´s 'mask' being just as much of a mask as Brucie is and. So much information in such a short time. Ouch :')

Good emotions. But too many D:

And now Cass has switched in! She´s taken Bruce’s seat and they ... Talk. Cass is not really all that jazzed about Danny knowing their vigilante secret. She´s also not happy about how the whole situation came about. Not sure what to think about Danny having killed someone.

And … Yeah. She has killed before. Has seen how the life of a man left him and decided: never again. She was raised as a weapon. Only a weapon - that leaves it´s traces.

And then she came to Gotham. She came to Bruce and became a vigilante and there´s the no kill rule (not that it always stops them from killing someone). And Danny just killed someone.

But it was the Joker. He´d done horrendous things to both Danny and her family. And in the end, if it´d been a member of her family who´d done the deed she would still feel not quite right about it. But the kill was not done out of some twisted sense of revenge or someone thing else. It was self-defence in the end. It was accident. So …

And in the end: she can´t be upset about all of that. She wouldn´t have wanted to lose Danny either. Even if she´d always had the feeling of not understanding him.

But that´s the thing about relationships isn´t it? They´re hard. They´re a work in progress. You can never know another person as intimately as you know yourself. We go into a relationship, any kind of relationship, with the intent to learn more about another person. Maybe also to learn more about ourselves. But at the core relationship works out if both people want to see the other for who they are and how they can make it work as a team. The same is true for friendships and family relationships. And there´s always more to learn.

Also. They´re just cute. Cass then asks what his parents did to Danny and his eyes just flash green.

There is no further information before the scene changes to the fathers trying to be subtle about spying on their kids through the window lmao

He recounts a number of their neglectful behaviours, their questionable morale standards, their involuntary hurting their children and just. Not once did they ever question themselves. Not once did they try to change or apologize. And then in the end? They used their blasters on him and he just ran. Danny´s so tired of running. So, so tired of it. He just wants somewhere to belong. A home without the danger of his own parental figures turning on him every second he´s there.

Cass is just so sweet as she gently reminds him that he´s not less important just because he hurt someone. Because in the end no one´s life is worth more, than one’s own. That she´s just glad she´s safe and god, I’m getting diabetes.

AND THEN THEY KISS. It´s all very romantic and cute and the fathers want to protest, but Tim is just sitting next to them with a camera making photos of the whole scenario because he wants to show them on their future wedding party. I understand you, my man, I understand you. That´s just the sibling in you. As well as the photographer. Those two go remarkably well together!

Tim be like:

While going home Lex and Danny make a pit stop at Harley´s and Ivy´s house where Harley and Lex badger Danny into going to therapy for the low price of Lex repairing their home and them basically becoming Danny´s Wine and Vodka aunts. Ahhh yes. Found family at its finest.

Danny also gets permission for a pet from Lex. LONG LIVE THE KITTEN EYES.

Of course, the public has already been informed about the death of the joker and how Danny had been involved. Gotham is throwing a party for him and they´re showered in confetti on their way to the airport. It´s all very heroic and nice. Until the antis come out. But they´ll always come out the little buggers.

And then. AND THEN. My favourite parts about this fic: one of the social media chapters. God damn.

It starts with their excitement about Danny coming to Gotham, worrying about the Joke r and then Danny in his custody, Danny’s health status as well as his being saved by red hood, people worrying about the joker, people being confused at Danny talking with Bruce in a diner, people insta-shipping Cass and Danny and being just so damned happy for them? It´s adorable. The social Media peeps are just CUTE.

And when they find out that Danny killed the joker all hell breaks loose. The stans, the antis - there´s fights breaking out over it, there parties, there´s just so much joy about that little fact.

And then people freak out about a pic Harley shared with the sirens and Danny and Bud and Lou during the Uno game. The Fanart is adorable and people are just joyous about Harley being like 'I´ve only known Danny for a day and a half, but if anything happened to him, I would kill everyone in this room and then myself'. Which. Yes. Dany protection squad RISE UP.

People are not comforted hearing the 'nah don’ worry I’ve had worse' comment upon being asked about his wellbeing.

The exact way Danny revealed that Danny and Cass are now dating just absolutely adorable. It´s so fucking sweet. The whole family is exasperated and the PR team probably wants to cry but god damn, it´s cuuteee

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patchesproblem · 10 months

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Hi.. I have come to talk about my Half-Life Einsla AU again. I went on a rant about it last night but I think that it's nonsensical enough but interesting enough to be shared here.

*Usual disclaimer for people finding this out of context: Tesla and Einstein are anime girls from HI3rd. I'm not writing fanfic / aus of real-life dead men please have mercy on me-

I've mentioned some of this before I think, but not the full scope of it.

For the most part, it follows during the same exact time as the HL 1 games, with Gordon Freeman still running around and doing his thing. The main difference is that they're in a different part of the facility than him and are actively trying to escape. They also don't have the luxury of being in HEV suits, nor do they have any knowledge of what was going on in the other areas of the facilities. Gordon plays a semi-important part in the background but it isn't until WAY later that they actually come face to face (that being before he jumps into Xen, but that's for later.)

They've worked in the facilities for a while, and they specialized in creating experimental technology essentially. Tesla occasionally helped with weapons however that wasn't her official role. They did not like their jobs in the slightest. They hated how things were run, and they felt like they were being suffocated in a way. It did not help that the pay was not worth the effort. The irony is that when the Resonance Cascade began they were actually about to leave for another base.

Now for some information that doesn't TECHNICALLY matter but it's hilarious to ME and I wanted to share.

Tesla DOES NOT like Gordon Freeman AT ALL. Einstein doesn't particularly like him, but Tesla has gone on full rants about how she doesn't even understand how he's working there. In her defense, though, she has reasons for it. She doesn't find him professional At All (which is ironic considering how she is), and doesn't understand how he's still hired. He's probably ruined her lunch before. Why? I don't know I just think it'd be funny lmao. Also they've heard the stories of him running through the vents. They don't understand what Kleiner see's in him.

She does have some respect for him, though. He is good at what he does and she'll begrudgingly admit it.

Einstein just finds him slightly annoying tbh.

They were relatively young when they started working at Blak Mesa. They met through Planck, and she helped them get their jobs. However Planck doesn't work there anymore. She's either at a different facility or retired, I'm not sure yet.

100% Would threaten the GMan and beat his ass just by pure audacity alone. They just want to go home they don't care that he's some god-like being. He will let them go home whether he likes it or not.

Now for the actually important stuff. When the Resonance Cascade first began they actually weren't supposed to be there. They had just finished packing their desks and were about to leave when it happened. Einstein was left relatively unscathed (minus some minor bruising/scratches (they would've been worse but Tesla threw herself over her to protect her)) and Tesla made it out with a few cuts/bruises and maybe fewer brain cells. However, some of the others in the room weren't so lucky.

They meet a security guard and help him gather everyone together, and the three go to the nearby guard room to try and call for help. They're unable to contact the surface, or anyone for that matter, and without warning a headcrab teleports into the room. The guard has zero clue what they are and it's at this point they realize something is seriously wrong. After talking to the other few survivors they ultimately decide that they'll be the ones to try to find help while the guard stayed behind to help the others.

Before they leave he gives them the key to one of the guard rooms where they find a map of the facility and guns/ammo. At that point, they start making their way through the facilities. However, their approach is different from Gordons'. Specifically, they avoid conflict as much as humanly possible, and they have to be extremely careful due to not having HEV suits. They do eventually have a run-in with the military however it's a one-time thing and their way of handling it is. Something to say the least.

Going through the facilities was easy at first. They were familiar with most hallways, and they really only encountered the occasional headcrab. I think it would be around this point that Einstein just picks on up and says 'We're adopting this thing' just to annoy Tesla. Yes, it ends up traveling with them on a leash. Yes, it wasn't happy about it. They bond though so it's fine.

They occasionally hear updates through the radios scattered around the base and through other scientists they find, however, it isn't until the military arrives that things get worse. They very quickly realize that the military is not on their side, and at that point on they have to start hiding and using their own skills to survive. Tesla makes hand-made grenades to deal with them in case they can't avoid them, which is effective for the most part.

Occasionally they hear things about Gordon and are amazed by the fact he's survived so long, and are amazed that he's managed to piss off the military so badly. They also learn through scientists that the Lambda team is trying to find a way to fix the disaster so they try to make their way there.

An accident occurs at some point where Einstein is in danger and nearly falls into a bunch of nuclear waste because the floor collapsed in, but Tesla managed to get her and pull her up. The headcrab somehow helps her by the sheer power of I think it'd be funny.

Once they make it up to the surface things get even more difficult. The places to hide are few and far between, and it was only by sheer luck that they managed to get far enough to get to the Lambda lab. This is where they get a glance of Gordon Freeman, but they don't even try to get to him. They figure he'll be fine and go on with their days trying to avoid the alien and military combat.

They end up making it there and they help the other scientists try to get it under control, and eventually Gordon arrives. They help get the portal open and just pray for the best.

I also had ideas for HL2, but I haven't fully finished watching a play through on it so I can't say anything for sure.

TLDR; All of this is stupid and is essentially me giving two insane scientists a gun and sending them on their merry way. They adopt a pet that could kill them and bicker like an old married couple, you know the usual.

#frederica nikola tesla #lieserl albert einstein #einsla #HL AU #honestly I'm just doing this because it has so much potential to be hilarious and angst.#There's a lot more but this is mostly just the major plot points.#nikolas posts

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slxthxrxn-sxmp · 2 years

Text

Strawberry Sugar Teaser

Mild Warning this is an a/b/o au and there is use of strong language

otherwise please enjoy !

(Gif is not mine )

˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .

Something was wrong.

The scene was too clean and yet too chaotic. Nothing like what you would expect from Gotham. Bleach had been used on the scene, so much so that it made everyone's nose hairs burn. And yet files were scattered around the room, blood spatter over the walls and floor like a scene from a horror movie.

The victim ? It was the mayor's Beta mistress. She had her cheeks torn to shreds, the flesh lying on the floor around her body, and she had a purple mark on her untouched arm like a needle entry site. On the outside it looked like an overdose but now here, in the room, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that this was foul play.

“Agent,” Gordons voice was shaky and low, bordering on a whisper. I walk to the bathroom where I was beckoned.

“You ever seen anything like this ?” Gordon indicated to the mirror standing in front of. The reflective surface took up one whole wall making the bathroom look mismatched to the rest of the apartment. But more importantly there was a big sloppy ‘J’ written in dark blood that looks to have congealed already. Out of instinct my gloved hand reaches out to the mirror hovering over the evidence by a few inches.

“Personally ? No, but I’ve seen-” there was a new presence in the house that had everyone's emotions shifting so I turn to find this person standing in the doorway, “Commissioner, you have a cosplayer on your crime scene.”

Gordon whips his head around to see the large alpha completely dressed in a black superhero suit topped with a cape. I couldn’t help but chuckle at the Commissioner's reaction, “Everyone clear out give us a minute!”

Then there was shuffling of every officer that was on scene, except for Gordon and I.

“Agent, this is-”

“Batman ? Don’t worry Gordon, my agency has dealt with its fair share of… masked heroes.” And with a nod to the masked person in question that is the end of the conversation. In turn he nimbly made his way through the house possibly to investigate the body.

The commissioner cleared his throat, it is a nervous tic of his. “You were saying ?”

“Hmmm,” my attention was back to the mirror, “this doesn’t fit the textbook profile of a victim quickly jotting down a clue for the next person to find. I would wager it's more of a signature.”

“How about a trading card ?” Electricity. Every nerve within my body decided then to make itself known. I didn’t need to shift my line of sight in the reflective metal to know it was the vigilante but I did it anyway. In his hand was a small white business card with a cartoon style green question mark.

“No, well I mean yes.” Ripping my eyes away from the man in a bat suit to then look at Gordon, “Might I request any files that include keywords starting or involving a capital J ranging from petty theft to- god- lets say homicide of any degree.” All the poor man could do was nod thoroughly confused. “And you,” I spun on my feet to face the Batman standing in the doorway once more, “bag that up we will figure out how that works into this mess.” After receiving a nod of acknowledgement, I made my way back to where the body was. Snatching a device from my pocket. The device was made by some other agents I worked with that scans for bugs and or secret cameras. Soon enough the other two still in the apartment filed into the room as well, looking concerned as to what I was doing.

“What did you say your agency was ?” His voice definitely was being put through a modifier. There was no possible way he could naturally have a voice like that.

“I didn’t, Mr. Bat.” Apparently the humor wasn't well timed as all I got was blank stares (despite Gordon already knowing my agency). “I work for the Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcement and Logistics Division otherwise known as Shield. Where we investigate and keep tabs on enhanced beings or otherworldly bodies.” The scan was now analyzing so I had the opportunity to give my attention to both men, slowly moving my shirt out of the way to flash them the badge around my waist.

“You’re in the wrong city, agent. Metropolis is a state over.” He was monotone. Almost testing the waters to see where he stood.

“I wasn’t assigned to otherworldly bodies, Batman.” Just like that his guard was back up and jokes ceased to exist.

The device in my hand pierced the air with a horrific screech. Just like that I scrambled through the scan looking for just what exactly it had picked up. All the while the noise continued.

“Can you turn that goddamn thing off, Agent ?” It was Gordon whose fingers were currently in his ears blocking out the noise.

Then after spinning around in a slow circle I found it. A seemingly innocent stuffed brown bear with a red nose. Happy with my discovery the device turned off taking the noise with it.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I believe we are being watched .” To get a better look I got on my knees in front of the toy, “Say hi to the camera.” My wave to the camera was abruptly stopped by Batman squatting next to me and grabbing the bear.

#Dk!Joker x Reader #Batman x Reader #Bruce Wayne x Reader #Reader is a shield agent #its a/b/o sorry not sorry #Joker x Batman x Reader

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