#and i've got 2 extra things on thursday | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

butchsophiewalten · 10 months

Note

can we hear more about YES? wha happened 👀

There's been a new Findjackwalten update! From what I can tell, this one alters one page (or two depending on how you count it) and adds one new one.

The main page has been updated: https://www.findjackwalten.com/

it strongly resembles the '/copia-de-nueva-pagina' page we discovered back in July, which now, in fact, redirects to it. The old homepage, /cyberfuntech82, is now a completely blank webpage.

Some images have been added to the new landing page that did not exist on the old /copia-de-nueva-pagina page, like the Cyberfun Tech poster we saw Martin post in his community tab is what I believe was May of last year? And three as yet unseen images of Little Bon, Little Bon and Little Sha, and then of the animatronic Bon. There's a fourth image not visible in this screenshot, of the exterior of Bon's Burgers (the same shot of it we seen in TWF1).

Clicking on the "JOB OFFER" image leads to a new webpage, findjackwalten.com/caretakerlibrary.

This page contains a greyed-out version of the banner from the homepage, a large greyed-out version of the mounted buck's head known for being on findjackwalten.com/jackwalten, and a picture of someone we can assume, thanks to later context, is named Richie. It looks like the background illustration of an anthropomorphized family of rabbits is still on this page, it's just mostly hidden by the other page assets. Something interesting to note about this page is that all of its images are actually in regular full color, the page just puts a black & white filter over them. It's thanks to that we can have this regular, full-color image of Richie.

This page claims to be a "Caretaker Audio Archive", which seems to be the same archive Brian mentioned in TWF1, when he mentioned being asked to record himself during his job "for the archives". It contains two pieces of audio attributed to an "R.", who worked for BSI between 1974 and 1975. It refers to him also as the "Night Shift CARETAKER A".

The first piece of audio, titled "richie 1" is dated 05-23-74, or the 23rd of May, 1974. I've transcribed it as follows, but this is pretty rough: Hey there! Its your, uh, it's your coworker Richie from uh, B-Uh, BSI. Uh, Felix probably mentioned me to you before, I-uh-I don't believe we've actually, yknow, met face-to-face before, but I-uh, look forward to working with you! Uh, so, uhm. Yeah, uh! I work the, uh, I work the- I'm working the night shift at the moment. Uh, and, uh, [UNINTELLIGIBLE] uhm, sorry you're not in any, uh, trouble or anything, heh. Uh-m just- saying hi. It's uh, company policy, all employees gotta, like, know each other so we can work more efficiently, I guess. I dunno. Uh, from what I've heard I take it you've been working here quite a while, right? Uh, summer job? Same here! Uh, so uh, where was I? Hmm.. Ah- uh, some notes from last week's shift, uhm, the arcade machines should be on their way by Tuesday, I think? We uh, we made a call with Starleys, uh, now they're going to be doing the installations themselves, so you don't gotta worry about that anymore. Just try and keep [UNINTELLIGIBLE] and plus, you now owe me a favor! Nah, just kidding. Uhh, so! Tech supervisor asked us to present the documentation of the animatronics' state by tomorrow! So, uh, yeah, better get that out of the way soon. And, uh, huh! I guess that's it. Ahh- sorry, and uh, one more thing, uh, I think we'll, uh, yknow, properly meet on, uhm, Thursday! I think. [UNINTELLIGIBLE] a tour of the installations. And, not-not the ones that smell like tobacco. The other one. So, uh, yeah, uh, see you there!

The second audio, titled "richie 2", is dated 06-18-74, or the 18th of June, 1974. This is, very notably, a week after Jack Walten's disappearance. I've transcribed it as follows: Hey, uh, just wanted to update you on everything that's been going on the past few days. So, uhh, for starters I got paid the extra hours for last week, so that's nice. Uhmm, right, uh, right. So, uh, did you get the memo, or whatever? Apparently the lockdown was because of some infestation or something? Yknow, like, bugs? Heh. So just a heads up if you feel kinda- smell chemicals and whatnot. Uhh, what else, what else, what else? Right, uh, right- so here, from next week onward, all animatronics will be cleaned and checked by authorized personnel. Nobody else is allowed- sorry- Nobody else is permitted to go near them until further notice. So, that's one less thing to worry about with our jobs, right? Uhhh, right- ah, oh right, uhm. Don't come to work on Monday. They're doing one more big cleanup to make sure there's no bugs crawling around or whatever. We, uh, we wouldn't really want our customers eating a beetle sandwich, yknow? Haha, sorry- hmm. Uhh, yeah! That's all for tonight. If you see any bugs in the next few days, just like, wack 'em with a newspaper or somethin'. You'll be fine. Anyways, uh, see ya around! Take care! Bye!

A very notable peculiarity with this is that the second audio sounds very... dank? Like it's being recorded in a cave? I have absolutely no idea what this means.

#the walten files #i actually decided im gonna kinda split this post in half and add some of my speculative commentary on thr new update later #because my head is getting cluttered with all thr writing right now #and i want to share most of the Important Info right away

75 notes · View notes

lantur · 5 months

Text

I got back from Peru this morning after an overnight flight from Lima. :) It's been wonderful to be with Derek and Westin again, and to nap and relax after a 10-day trip!

Unorganized thoughts,

The Inca Trail was the most intense, demanding physical experience of my life. The group my friend and I were with hiked 26 miles/41 kilometers over 4 days, in rough terrain including the highlands of the Andes, the Amazon, and the cloud forests of Peru. The hike was at altitude, at an elevation nearing 13,828 feet/4,215 meters - which I struggled with, coming from living at sea level. I learned that I'm fit on sea level, but NOT at altitude. I also caught a pretty bad cold from another group member overnight on Day 3, which made Day 3 and Day 4's hikes extra challenging.

We were up at 4:30 AM every morning (3:30 AM on our final day to reach Machu Picchu), and due to my slower pace/altitude struggles, I usually had ~10-12 hours of hiking steep inclines and inclines. It was really so hard and I had to be very careful on the steep, rocky steps. The hiking poles saved me! We had to ascend and descend four mountains over the course of our hike. Ascents were really challenging for me due to shortness of breath at altitude. Descents were easier on my cardiovascular system, but required a lot of concentration to make sure I didn't miss my footing and fall down steep, uneven stone steps. Each step was about 12 to 18 inches high, which is significant for my friend and I, who are under five feet tall.

We also camped every night for 3 nights, in tents, which I've never done before. Our group bonded over the struggles of surviving the hideous campsite bathrooms, not being able to shower for four days, finding safe and private places to use the bathroom in the wild, staying warm at night, staying dry in the constant rain on day 2, and our feet and legs killing us at the end of the day. We ate every breakfast, lunch, dinner, and teatime together, and I liked everyone in the group. :) We enjoyed our time together and talked a lot.

We got to explore several Inca ruins on the way to Machu Picchu, and Machu Picchu itself was incredible. The scenery and views along the hike - the mountains, the jungle, the cloud forest - made it worth it, despite how physically difficult it was. I've never seen anything like it before. The sound of the birds singing in the jungle, the llamas and alpacas in the mountains, the butterflies, the rainforest flora... That was amazing.

One of my favorite memories was Thursday morning, when we all woke up at 3:30 AM and hiked in the dark to be among the first at the checkpoint to enter. We all brushed our teeth in the forest around the trail and hung out until the sun rose at 5:30 AM and we could enter the park. :)

My friend and I spent Friday chilling out in Cusco and recovering from our hike. We were SO tired when we got back to our hotel on Thursday night, and so relieved to finally shower and sleep in a real bed. We traveled from Cusco to Lima to Atlanta/Miami to Minneapolis. I got home this morning around 10:45 and I've literally just been sitting on the sofa or napping. Doing post-trip laundry was the big accomplishment of the day, lmao.

This was such an adventure. I'm so glad I could do it, and return safe. It was wonderful to experience South America for the first time, and I hope to go back many times. It was wonderful to completely disconnect with no phone/internet while I was in the mountains. The whole experience was a test of my physical and mental endurance, and my ability to be out of my comfort zone - but as I told my friend when we got back, while I was on the trail, simply focusing on nature and getting through each ascent and descent safely, it let me forget about the things I've experienced this year. My dad dying, estrangement from my mom, the ongoing interpersonal stresses at work. It was a great way to close out my 30th year, which has also been my hardest year.

My 31st birthday is tomorrow. :)

#lanturing

33 notes · View notes

pumpkzsafeplace · 8 months

Text

witchreg wednesday! : the lead up to mabon! 🔮 ahhhh! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა for witches, this week is an important build up for the Mabon Celebration which starts next week on the 21st September and will carry on until the 24th Septemeber. of course, being a pagan myself, i will be having a little event on the pumpkin blog to celebrate the festival! it will run from Thursday to Sunday but don't worry, regular posts will still be uploaded too! so nobody is missing out! <3 a lot of witches have been asking me what i've been doing leading up & what i've got planned for the actual day so here are some of my things! <3 on the lead up to mabon: 1. deep cleaning. - i wanted to get rid of everything old and start autumn wish a fresh home to wish new things into! <3. you don't have to deep clean- i just did because i have the extra time. 2. collecting things. - with the celebration of mabon, i of course need to decorate my alter too! but with everything being expensive recently, i've resulted in hand making a lot of my deocrations or collecting things like (rocks, leaves, sticks) from outside too! (make sure you use anti-bacterial to wash and stuff so it's not icky!)

3. plan simple - you don't have to be grand to be a good witch, as long as the intent is there, then that's all that matters <3. you could even do something as simple as dressing up in autumn colours! or burning some candles and journaling what you want to happen this autumn <3. go where your craft takes you & have fun with it too! do whatver makes you feel happy <3.

gif isn't mine

of course, as a pagan myself, there will be a 4 day event and adorable little posts through thursday to sunday, as well as the regular posts! but a lot of people have been asking what i've been doing as we lead up to the festival to prepare myself so here you go! <3.

mabon is next week and the pumpkin house hold is super duper excited! <3. we will have a four day event on the pumpkin blog to explain & celebrate the festival together!

mabon is next week and the pumpkin house hold is super duper excited! <3. the

24 notes · View notes

not-poignant · 8 months

Note

I hope it's okay to ask, but how are things? Looking forward to Underline The Gold on Sunday so much

Omg I'm looking forward to it too

Tbh I'm up to chapter 8 on that now so we're ready to really start pushing ahead with some of the side stories which is exciting

As for me, it's been pretty rough, anon, not gonna lie. I'm going to put this under a read more because I'm pretty honest and also because there's more than one 'I might have cancer' mention among other things:

I kind of thought I was doing fine and then it all got on top of me a couple of days ago and (self-harm mention) I ended up self-injuring due to autistic meltdown. Sometimes I don't realise how bad things really are until I'm at that stage and I have bruises and soft tissue damage to show for it. I've since talked to my doctor and therapist about it, but like...oof.

I've actually been taking a break from writing since I've hit 50k and I generally have a rule that I have to take at least 2-4 days off once I've hit that point, but I'm still pretty stuffed, but mostly for health reasons. I've written 14 chapters this month so I feel okay about the break lol.

On Friday (the day after the meltdown) I needed to have a hand X-ray (even right now, the knuckles in my left hand are really sore), see my GP for 40 minutes, talk to my therapist, organise an iron infusion (I have microcytic anemia and need an iron infusion again, which I think is my 5th or 6th - I need one about once every 2-3 years, and mostly the time between is the slow downward spiral of losing more and more iron until I'm truly fucked) and a meeting with one of the head haematologists in the state because my red blood cells are bullshit and weird (yay). Guess that explains the exhaustion.

I still need to organise a lymph node ultrasound (which is probably nothing, except there is like a 'higher than average' chance it could be metastatic cancer, since I do have tumours in my head right now that could metastasize, and the tumours are extremely close to the swollen lymph node - also I haven't had a virus).

I need to organise a meeting with a dermatologist, I need to organise a full abdominal MRI to see if I have any other tumours we don't know about, and I got an eating disorder management plan for restrictive eating, which does entitle me to like...cheaper dietitian appointments, but also formalises me as having an ED as opposed to 'disordered eating.'

On top of that I had to deal with a tribunal after my Dad had a catastrophic stroke a few months ago, and the tribunal was last month, to determine who would look after him. Our family is so broken and my stepmother so manipulative/vindictive that the government decided no one could be trusted and took care of his finances and healthcare themselves meaning none of us can have any real say in his future (truly the best outcome, but a damning one for the state of the family), and I also had to listen to my stepmother accuse my sister of being a criminal for 20 minutes with completely unfounded lies, and of course, my Dad has had a catastrophic stroke, and that's complicated. That's a whole...

That saga is so much anon, I cannot even begin to explain even the tip of that iceberg.

I've been spending a lot of extra time like scanning family photos and other things and packing items in his home for storage etc. and while that's been done now for over a month and a half, I guess the burn out started some time ago and it's just been slowly getting on top of me. Kind of the 'slowly boiling a lobster in a pot' analogy.

I've been overall quieter on Tumblr as a result of all of this, and it all just...destroyed me on Thursday, and ever since then I've been recovering.

I've just realised it's nearly 1.00am and I swear the last time I looked at the clock - which felt like 5 minutes ago - it was 11.00pm.

Oh and to top it all off I've had vicious 'not falling asleep until 4.00am' insomnia + increased nightmares because my PTSD has relapsed back into 'pretty severe.' So um, managing most nights on 3-4 hours of sleep a night, and that's bad for all my chronic illnesses, of which I have many.

Ah. Yeah. :(

Lemme rustle up some good news for you, anon, because I feel like this is just too much crap.

Bushflowers/wildflowers are really nice right now as it's turning to spring in Western Australia (it's Djilba in the Noongar seasonal system, which I prefer)

Rhubarb is in season so I'm making a lot of stewed apple and rhubarb as a comfort food.

Reading the manhwa Punch Drunk Love and enjoying it.

Asks like yours - even if all of this sounds dire - helps me to undestand that I actually do have good reasons to feel tired and that it's okay to take breaks and that's really valuable (sometimes - though rarely - people use my anon function to talk at me, rather than talking to me as a person, and I just...really value feeling like a person sometimes aslfkjsa) so while I might seem down, this has actually been nice to end my night on. Also you've reminded me that I am super excited/happy to share more Underline the Gold with people

I got some organisational stuff and organising stuff in the house makes me feel good.

I have an extremely good doctor and tbh for a long time I didn't, so like, every good specialist and doctor is worth their weight in gold. :)

I hope you're doing okay and looking after yourself / taking care anon, and that you get something good out of what remains of the weekend. <3 And for everyone who needs one, hugs are on the house.

#personal #cw cancer mention #cw self injury #cw PTSD #cw major depressive disorder #maybe you just wanted me to say that things are going good #but i assume folks know what i'm really like sdfalkfjsa #i'll generally be honest #and just give folks the option not to read it lol #anon i am on the strugglebus #i am going to bed #and i hope i'm not still awake and having flashbacks #in 4 hours #but like who knows salkfjsafs #actually last night was a lil better so maybe /crosses fingers

36 notes · View notes

ivarlover · 1 year

Text

UNDENIABLE PART 2 (Sequel to UNLEASHED)

Alex + Modern Ivar

Mentions of Female Reader + Hvitserk

This was supposed to be just a one-shot but the story has come alive for me and the need to write more can't be ignored. At this point, I have no idea how many chapters this will end up consiating of. Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it! 🔥

Summary: During a hot weekend with your classmate, Alex, and his best friend, Ivar, the two of them had their own fun together. And now, it had turned into what looked like a confusing situation in the light of day. What did it all mean to them now? What would happen with their friendship? Can they move forward as friends or has all been lost? Is friends to lovers even a possibility at this point?

Inspired by a naughty conversation with a friend of mine. 😍 (You know who you are).

Warnings: This chapter: Unfortunately, this chapter does have more heartache, but if you're still following, hang in there. There's still more to come and I promise, you won't be sad.

The sequel in general: Totally NSFW, Unprotected anal sex (male receiving), oral, male to male contact and more, heartbreak, and a bad case of the feels, and smut, with me, there is ALWAYS smut 🤣

Please leave a comment and let me know what you think!

*LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT ON OR OFF OF THE TAG LIST!*

Words: I don't know; there are many, many words 🤣

-------------------------------------------

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

-------------------------------------------

The next few days were dark and lonely for Alex. Even with you by his side, he still felt empty and alone. He felt completely lost. Although he couldn't stop thinking about Ivar, he was determined to continue on. He had work and school to attend to, a big weekend event to get ready for, and didn't have time to dwell on things that almost happened, things that could have been. He tried to stay busy. It was hard.

As Thursday rolled around, you were there with Alex in the bar, putting the the final touches on the decorations for Saturday. To prevent the need to spend early Saturday morning working to get everything ready for the night, Alex had decided to close the bar Friday night. "Well, apparently, I have nobody to answer to so we'll get everything finished tonight and we won't have come at all tomorrow and we won't have to worry about it getting destroyed by tomorrow night's crowd," Alex told you. You didn't miss the pain in his voice but chose not to address it. You knew he'd talk to you if he needed to.

Still, your heart broke for him. You were truly lost as to what happened with Ivar. He'd completely ghosted Alex and you'd stopped trying to figure out why and had decided to just be there for your friend. Saturday would be here before you knew it and you wanted to offer all the help you could provide to Alex so it would be one less thing he'd have to stress about.

This after party for the couple's marriage was going to be big for business and you'd set out to make it as close to perfect as possible.

-------------------------------------------

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

-------------------------------------------

"I can't believe this is really happening! We will get so much exposure tomorrow night. I have all the extra helpers in place and ready to work, too. Can you think of anything I've missed, Y/N?" Alex sat in the floor across from you as the two of you ate take out at his coffee table. "It's kind of nice not to be there on a Friday night. How is your food? Do you need anything else to drink?" He looked at your curious face, "Oh, I'm sorry, Y/N," he laughed. "I know I'm all over the place. I'm just excited and I've got a million things going through my mind all at once."

You laughed, "It's ok but maybe focus on one thing at a time. You're going to wear yourself out before tomorrow even gets here." You guys talked for what seemed like forever and you enjoyed seeing him in better spirits. These last two weeks had been rough.

Alex stood up, taking your plates. "Wait. I'll help," you told him, scrambling to get up, too.

"No, you find us a movie or something to watch. I'll take everything to the kitchen. Don't worry about it. Want a glass of wine?"

"Sure," and you got up on the sofa and turned the television on. As you began flipping through the channels, you thought you heard something outside. You muted the TV and listened and yes, there was someone at the door. Why hadn't they rang the doorbell? You called out to Alex but it sounded like he must have went to the bathroom.

Annoyed that whoever it was still hadn't knocked or anything, you got up and went to the door. Placing both hands, palms down, on the door, you stood in front of it and tiptoed to see through the peephole. "Holy fucking shit!" you softly gasped.

"Hey, I didn't know if you wanted red or white wine, so I just brought the glasses and both bottles. We can't be letting perfectly good wine go to waste, now can we?" Alex walked in from the other side of the room behind you and hadn't looked up to you yet. "So? Which will it be, Y/N?"

As Alex looked up at you, to his surprise, he saw you standing at the open door. There stood Ivar in the doorway looking at Alex like a lost puppy. "Can, umm," he swallowed loudly, "Can I come in?" Ivar asked. Completely shocked, Alex dropped both wine glasses, them shattering to the floor.

You tried not to laugh. "Umm, I'll be right back. I need to umm, make a phone call," you said as you left Ivar standing in the door, deciding to give them some time to talk. Alex just knodded at you, still completely dumbfounded.

Uncertain of himself, Ivar said, "I'm sorry to interrupt you guys. I, umm, I can come back." He took a step back, and Alex almost lunged at him but caught himself.

"No! I, umm, I mean, umm... Yes, Ivar, please come in."

Ivar's heart stopped. He'd actually expected Alex to let him leave. He came in and closed the door behind himself and stood there by it. "I'd offer you a drink, but umm, it seems I've just broken these two glasses. I'm not sure I trust myself with two more," Alex nervously laughed, bending down to pick up the pieces.

"Here, let me help you with that," Ivar rushed over to Alex and bent down to help him.

Their hands brushed up against eachother's and they both froze. Alex looked up at Ivar and Ivar stood back up. "What are we doing here, Ivar? I need some answers," Alex said as he stood up, too, just leaving the broken glass in the floor.

"Why, umm, why is the bar closed? I went to find you there," Ivar nervously asked.

"Remember that couple who are getting married and wanted a venue for their after party?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, they chose us. Their after party is tomorrow night, and rather than spend all day there tomorrow, preparing, decorating, and cleaning, we decided to just close it tonight," Alex explained to Ivar.

"We?" Ivar wasn't sure who Alex meant, and his heart kind of stopped again.

"Well, Y/N and I. She's been helping me out since, umm, well, since you have been missing in action." Alex braced himself for Ivar's reaction, not knowing, exactly, what it may be.

Ivar felt anger run through his veins. He hadn't came all the way over to Alex's to be made fun of. Maybe it had been a mistake to come over after all. His immediate reaction was to tell Alex to fuck off and to walk back out the door. That was until he looked into Alex's eyes and saw the pain. In fact, he could tell Alex was struggling to hold back his emotions. He wasn't sure if he was about to cry or scream but seeing the stress across his face completely calmed Ivar. The last thing he wanted to do was make this any worse.

Surprisingly, to Alex and Ivar both, Ivar grabbed Alex's hands in his, "Alex, umm, can we talk about that? Umm, I mean, can we talk about umm, us?"

Alex wasn't sure what to say. Hadn't he tried this already? "Umm, Ivar, that's well, that's what I've tried to do, and you are the one who just completely shut me out. Is there even an us to discuss? I'm not usually the type that likes to be involved after a certain point, Ivar, and honestly, I'm not so sure how much more of this I can take." He pulled his hands out of Ivar's and ran them through his own hair. "I mean, honestly, I'm just confused."

Feeling worried, Ivar motioned towards the sofa. "Can we sit?"

Alex walked over to it and sat down, not knowing what to expect. "Hear me out, Alex. This is a lot." Ivar sat down beside him and turned facing him. "You remember my brother, Hvitserk?"

Alex was confused. "Hvitserk? Yes, of course I remember him."

"Well, Alex, he and my mom have been at my place for the last two weeks. Hvitserk has an alcohol and drug problem. He has for a while, but he's been able to stay away from it. Apparently, some guys took advantage of his problem and got him drinking and convinced him to do a line of coke with them. He showed up at mom's completely out of it, saying he wanted me. She was going to admit him into rehab, but he said he'd kill himself if she did. He only wanted me. She called me and they've been at my place since that Monday after our," Ivar looked up at Alex, nervously, "Well, after our weekend."

Shocked to his core, Alex wasn't sure what to say, so he just said the first thing that came to mind. "So you avoided me because you were what? Embarrassed? Ashamed?" Alex felt his stomach knot up, and his heart completely stop.

"No! No, Alex. It has taken everything out of me to keep my brother in my house and not let him leave for drugs or alcohol. Not to mention keeping an eye on him to be sure he doesn't try to do something stupid to himself. He's been going through the worst withdrawals. I've had to be there with him, by his side, day and night. I've hardly slept at all. He's fought me every step of the way, but I couldn't leave him, and I definitely couldn't bring him with me to my work at the bar."

Alex interrupted him, "Ok. I get it, but no phone calls or text messages, Ivar? Something to clue me in on what was going on? Something to let me know that I wasn't just, umm, damn! Just another fuck for you, meaningless. Or fuck, was I?" Alex immediately felt embarrassed at his words. He dropped his head to his hands. He couldn't bear to look at Ivar. He wasn't sure he could handle Ivar's answer.

Ivar's heart sank. He'd been so wrapped up in everything going on in his world that he honestly hadn't stopped to think how Alex may have taken everything, how he might be feeling. He felt so guilty and selfish.

He gently grabbed Alex's hand and pulled it away from his face. Slowly, Alex looked up at him, eyes wet. Ivar wiped a tear off of his cheek. "No, God no, Alex. It wasn't meaningless.

Not by far. I meant everything I said to you that night." He felt a bead of sweat roll down his face. This was hard, harder than he'd expected.

His heart rate sped up, and he continued, "Umm, but it, umm, I didn't really have time to even process everything before all of this with Hvitserk was dropped in my lap. My mom called me every single time I left the house without them. She was so scared to be left alone with him. And I've told you how suffocating my mom can be and how she wants to control me. I was already exhausted, and I wasn't able to handle all the questions I knew she'd have for me. Especially when I, myself, still didn't know the answers yet. I wanted to call you. I think I was, umm, well, I guess I kind of freaked out. And then, when you didn't call me either, I thought maybe you regretted it. And umm, I was. Fuck. I was scared, Alex. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm truly sorry." He placed his hand on Alex's cheek and held it there.

Alex reached up and placed his hand over Ivar's. "I..I did call you, Ivar, and I was heartbroken when I heard some woman in the background calling you sweetheart." Alex choked on his words and held his breath to prevent himself from doing the ugly cry.

"Alex, fuck, that was my mom!" Ivar gasped, guilt sweeping all over him again.

Alex half-heartedly smiled and said, "Well, I know that. Now." For some reason, he still couldn't feel relieved yet. Yes, he was happy that he'd misunderstood everything but it didn't change how deeply hurt he had been because of it. "But last weekend? What happened? You seemed so, I don't know, so cold, distant. That's why I left. It hurt, Ivar."

Ivar explained that he'd come to talk then but saw him with you and felt jealous. "I, umm, I thought maybe you belonged with her, Alex, and maybe me being there was preventing you from true happiness with her. I, umm, I didn't want.. umm, to get in the way." He dropped his head.

How had both of them read everything so wrong? Was this because of the sensitive subject and how new and unexpected everything was to them both? Alex sat quietly, trying to wrap his head around everything. He was still a bit too nervous about everything but he had to admit how nice it was to have Ivar sitting here on his sofa with him.

Ivar interrupted Alex's train of thought, "Alex, I'm truly, truly sorry. I promise, I never wanted to hurt you or for you to feel used." He grabbed both of Alex's hands and held them in his. "Alex, can we..."

At that very moment, Alex's front door swung open. There stood Hvitserk in the doorway. He quickly scanned the room before entering. "Well, long time, no see, mother fucker!" Hvitserk said, walking toward the two of them on the sofa.

-------------------------------------------

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

-----------‐--------------------

Ivar practically yanked his hands away from Alex and straightened his body. Alex was kind of taken back by Ivar's sudden stiffness. Before he could say or do anything, Hvitserk stepped closer and said, "Humm, what kind of lover's quarrel have I just interrupted?" He leaned back, laughing, and said, "I'm just kidding, guys. Fuck! Chill!" He looked at the two of them closer, "Oh shit! I'm right, ain't I? Fuck, man! Shit, forget it. Stand up and give your big brother a hug, Alex. What's it been? Two? Three years?"

Alex stood and hugged Hvitsert. "It's, yes, it's been a while," Alex tried not to sound as nervous as he actually was.

"So," Hvitserk began, "What you got to eat, man? This mother fucker over here has had me in the car waiting on him so we can go for some food."

Alex laughed nervously as Ivar stared at Hvitserk like he had horns growing from his head. Hvitserk looked at Ivar, still sitting on the sofa. "What, man? Not my fault you're in trouble with your dude." He looked over to Alex. "What did he do? Need me to kick his ass for you?"

Alex gulped. He was completely shocked that Hvitserk had picked up on anything. He was upset that Hvitserk had interrupted such a tender moment but that was definitely Hvitserk for you. "Umm, I think there's some leftover pizza in the fridge. Some things never change, huh? Always hungry. Come with me."

-------------------------------------------

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

-------------------------------------------

You had heard all the noise and stepped quietly out of the room to see what was going on. You recognized the panicked look across Alex's face immediately when your eyes met his, so you walked straight to them.

Hvitserk, being the guy he was, looked straight at you and said, "Umm, hungry? Yeah, but I think I'll have my dessert first. Hi, I'm Hvitserk. And who might you be?"

Ivar had came into the kitchen with you guys. "I'm sorry. Hvitserk, this is our friend, Y/N. Now, please leave her alone."

Hvitserk took a step back and looked around at the three of you and then back to Ivar. "Holy shit, man! Are you fucking them both?! Where the fuck do I sign up for this shit?" You dropped your head, blushing even more with embarrassment but you still smiled. "Fuck! What else have I missed since I've been gone? My fucking little brother got some game!"

Ivar smacked Hvitserk upside his head and put his arm around him and turned him toward the door, "See why my fucking brother doesn't need to drink? This is him sober!" He took a step with him, "I'm sorry, guys. We should go now."

"Wait," you stepped toward them, "Umm, he's not a bother. I can get his pizza, umm, so you and Alex can finish your, umm, conversation?" You couldn't help it. Obviously, the Lothbroks had damn good genes. Hvitserk was taller and a little thinner than Ivar but still muscular and gorgeous with his long hair and pretty blue eyes. You also loved the way he was looking at you, like he could strip you naked right there. And honestly, part of you wished he would.

Hvitserk instantly pulled away from Ivar and stepped toward you. "Yeah, you kids run and play. The two of us have adult business to discuss." Not taking his eyes off yours, he grabbed your hand. "The pizza doesn't happen to be located in the bedroom, does it?" he laughed. You felt your cheeks blush again. "It's incredibly attractive watching you blush. I could get used to this."

"Umm, let me get that pizza," you pulled your hand from his and went to the refrigerator.

Ivar and Alex looked at eachother and Ivar shrugged his shoulders, defeated. He waved Alex to come with him and the two of them went back to the living room together and sat back down on the sofa again. "He has done me that way my entire life," Ivar began, "But I guess Y/N has been the only one who I was actually with first," he laughed as he flashed his devilish smile at Alex, then added, "And I doubt, very seriously, he can do for her what the two of us did."

Blushing, Alex smacked him on the chest. "Ivar! Don't talk about Y/N like that! If he's a dog we should probably rescue her from him, though, no?"

"No, no. He's ok. He knows better than to hurt her. That's how he figured out everything so quickly, because I was protective of her," Ivar answered. A little louder, he continued, "He won't hurt her. I'll break his fucking neck if he does and he knows that."

From the kitchen, Hvitserk called, "Hey! I heard that!"

"Good, I fucking meant for you to, numb nuts!"

------------------------------------------

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

-------------------------------------------

"So," Ivar took a deep breath, "Where were we?" He gave Alex a warm smile.

Alex was surprised Ivar wanted to continue their conversation but still decided to give Ivar an out. "Umm, well, I just miss my best friend and want him back, Ivar. I just want things to be good with us again." He nervously looked to Ivar.

Ivar leaned closer to him and spoke softly, "That's just it, Alex. I think, umm, actually, I'm sure that umm, I want more than that. I mean, if you do."

Alex's mouth dropped. He was speechless. Just as he finally began to speak, "Ivar. Umm, I, uh," he grabbed Ivar's hand, "I," his doorbell rang. "Fuck!"

Looking back at Ivar, hating that they'd been interrupted yet again, Alex walked over and opened his door, "Umm, Mrs. Lothbrok!" Surprised, he turned back to Ivar. "Come in."

Alex heard Ivar sigh as he stood to meet his mother. "Did you two forget about me in the car?" She asked Ivar.

"No, mom. I was just waiting on Hvitserk. He's eating pizza." Ivar turned to Alex. "You remember Alex, don't you, mom?"

"Oh, yes. Of course. I'm sorry. Where are my manners? I'm sorry to have so rudely intruded," she smiled at Alex and kissed him on the cheek.

"It's fine. Don't worry about it," he said, looking at Ivar's apologetic smile.

Hvitserk and you came from the kitchen, and he introduced you. "Mom, this is, well," he looked into your eyes and smiled, "My future girlfriend." You blushed again. What was it about this guy?

Aslaug looked you over in a very critical way but then hugged you, "Any friend of my boys' is a friend of mine. Nice to meet you, sweetheart." As she hugged you, all you could think about was how quickly everything had just changed.

Alex asked if he could get Aslaug anything to eat or drink and as she began to answer, Ivar interrupted her and nervously answered, "Um, no thanks, Alex. We should probably be leaving now."

Aslaug looked to Ivar, studying his face. "What am I missing here, dear?" She looked around at everyone. "Everyone seems to be on pins and needles."

"Nothing, mom. I just figured it's time for us to leave now, before we've worn out our welcome," Ivar was quick to answer her.

"Well, you're welcome to stay as long as you'd like," Alex said, looking around at them, "Y/N and I didn't have any plans this evening."

"Oh?" Aslaug began, as she gave you that same critical look, "Y/N, do you live here with dear Alex?"

You were taken back by her elegance, but somehow, she still seemed to make you feel inadequate. Inadequate of what, you weren't quite sure. There was no way she knew anything had happened between the three of you, but she definitely had this way about her. You were honestly glad you weren't in Alex's shoes. He was going to have a difficult time measuring up to her expectations, especially since he's a man. But you just knew from watching Ivar with him that there was going to be something very serious between them. It was obvious, and maybe this was why Aslaug was acting this way. She had to notice it as well.

"Um, no ma'am," you answered her. "I'm just really good friends with Alex. And Ivar, too. I'm just visiting."

"Well, you need to come visit me back at Ivar's place," Hvitserk said and kissed you on the cheek. "There's the blush in your face that I adore so much," he grinned.

"Well," Aslaug smiled, "Aren't all the boys just smitten with you?"

"Mom! Enough!" Ivar stepped in front of you just as you were about to put this woman in her place. You didn't care whose mom she was.

Hvitserk was clearly thrilled at your obvious reaction, smiling from ear to ear at you. He walked to Aslaugh's side. "Well, it's been nice seeing you again, Alex, and definitely nice meeting you, Y/N. I'll be in touch. Mom, Ivar is right. Let's go." He draped his arm around her shoulder and turned toward the door, not giving her an opportunity to protest. He looked back and said, "Ivar, we'll meet you in the car. After you say your goodbyes, of course," as he winked at you. He is slick. He walked her out the door and closed it behind them.

"Damn! What the fuck was that about?" you asked.

"My mom is a little too observant for her own good. And she's obviously too nosy. I'm so sorry, guys. She's so overbearing." Ivar looked completely defeated.

"It's ok, Ivar. I remember her well. She's always been like that. She means well. She just loves you and wants what's best for you like any mom. But look, don't worry. You're completely off the hook here. You owe me nothing," Alex swallowed loudly.

Ivar looked confused, "But Alex, we're not done here."

"Yes, we are, Ivar. For now anyway. You have too much on your plate right now and I truly understand. Just. Just make sure you keep in touch with me, ok?" Alex was even surprised at his words himself, but he knew this was best for now. He didn't want Ivar to end up resenting him and he knew this situation had the very potential for just that. He could push his own feelings aside for now. He'd already done it this long. What was a little more time? He definitely had no plans of getting into a pissing contest with Aslaug.

As he stared blankly at Alex, Ivar was completely speechless. This was not how he'd seen this evening working out. He felt crushed and completely defeated, and if he was being honest, he was a little pissed off. How could Alex just act as if none of this was important? Was he seriously simply putting what he thought was Ivar's best interests above his own? "But, Alex?"

Alex stepped to Ivar and placed his hand on his cheek. He looked Ivar deeply in his eyes and softly spoke, "Don't worry, Ivar. This is not the end. Just go and take care of your family. They need you more than I do right now." Ivar's eyes began to tear up, but he quickly, angrily wiped them dry. Alex's heart lunged for him, but he stayed steady. "I promise it will be ok."

Ivar only knodded his head and he turned to the door, not saying a word. He walked out, never looking back.

-------------------------------------------

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

-------------------------------------------

As soon as the door closed, Alex fell to the floor, his face in his hands. You rushed to him, wrapping your arms around him and holding him tightly as he began to cry. "What the fuck, Alex? What the hell is wrong with you? That man loves you! Can't you see that? Why did you send him away like that?" You were completely shocked and confused. He finally had his chance and he ended it before it even began.

He slowly lifted his head and looked at you. The pain in his eyes was almost too much for you to bear. "Y/N, you can't possibly know how he feels about me. And Hvitserk needs to be his priority right now. If we try this in the middle of him trying to help his brother get well, he'll resent me. I just know it. I'll add too much stress for him right now and you saw his mom. She will never give him a moment's rest about how he plans to give her grandchildren if I'm his choice. Nobody will ever be good enough for her boys but I definitely won't be. He doesn't need all of that right now. If it's meant to be, it will just have to wait. We shouldn't have to defend it straight out the gate." He dropped his head back down and sighed.

"But, Alex! You can't make that choice for him! He obviously thinks you're worth it. And so do I, damn it! And I'm sorry to break the news to you, but if you're going to be romantically involved with another man, you're, unfortunately, going to have to get used to defending your relationship with him. That sucks, I know, but society isn't there yet. They don't understand that you simply just love who you love."

"Well, it's done now. It'll be ok," he gulped. "It has to be."

You placed your arms around him and hugged him tightly. "I'm so sorry, Alex." You knew this was serious for him, too. That was the most selfless thing you'd ever seen anyone do. You just hoped Ivar would see it, too.

@istorkyou @vero-maris-zamo @chapada010101010 @ivarhoegh @lostasalice-thisway @lonewolf471 @lemonsarepink @covidinducedsocialreject

#ivar the boneless smut #ivar the boneless fanfiction #alex hogh andersen x reader #ivar the boneless fic #alex høgh andersen #alex hogh andersen #alex hoegh andersen #modern ivar

35 notes · View notes

wavernot4love · 3 months

Text

hello wanted 2 talk about a bunch of fun things from Thursday first show of War All The Time tour 2nite at the Town Ballroom in Buffalo (this will include setlist spoilers)

(starting with a random little video of title track, the rest of it is in the keep reading thingy)

- TURNPIKE DIVIDES FOR THE LAST SONG??? they let her see the light of day!!! i am probably the only person who has heard her at 2/3 of the thursday sets they have seen /lh

- geoff took the piss out of victory records for not paying bands while talking about how i'll be you & jbny are mirrors of each other then played them back to back (also described jbny as their heaviest song.... correct!!!)

- crowd was GREAT. great pits, surfing vibes, actually hell, vibes were just great all around.

- make sure you get there early so you can catch both many eyes & rival schools (steve (thursday) actually played for rival schools today which was cool). i thoroughly enjoyed both sets, and tonight honestly made me a fan of many eyes as a project. i wasn't sure what to expect receptionwise from a buffalo crowd [insert every time i die lore] but everyone showed up for keith (buckley, former singer of etid)/them. i also thought he/they did great, and he seemed genuinely humbled. also saw him around after the show, bro was loading out merch so i didn't wanna bother him, but yeah, dude seemed chill. really enjoyed the songs as well, i'll be spinning them and staying tuned for future releases for sure.

- between that set, everyone just feeling like a true community all night, & a cameo from a local scene legend (if you know hardcore, the singer of terror/buried alive was watching sidestage all show, keith shouted him out hahaha), let's just say i felt like how i'd imagine patriotic americans feel when they hear the national anthem, but the western new yorker edition.

- between rupture and rapture & division st. were probably my favorite non big singles. so great to hear watt in full dude and the crowd was very engaged the whole time

- one thing that really sucks is geoff explained as they came out that pretty much all their instruments randomly got stolen right before they left for tour, so they were a little panicky and stuff but basically, nothing was gonna stop them from having a good time in buffalo (paraphrased). apparently when they were sorting out the tour routing a while back someone told them they should start in toronto but they were like, nah dude, we want to start in buffalo. back to my western ny patriotism analogy, i see. anyways, now that's what i call resilience. they put on a great performamce with such great energy, you can tell this is a band that truly loves doing this whole thing. support the guys extra hard this run.

- as the opening bit of understanding started i looked back at the carnage going on in the giant pit that was open at the moment and had to just. smile at That being a moment people were crowdkilling each other to /lh

- i brought my (digital) point & shoot and shot from the crowd! very stoked on those as i was quite close all show, will update with those once i edit em! will probably also be posting a review kinda thing on my site/ziney thing once i get that back up and published

- one final thing that haunts me is the wonder of what geoff was talking about here in this instagram story post from earlier. i even stuck around after the show (which ended around 10:30) in case... i don't know, thursday were to fly out of some sort of confetti cannon at 11 pm sharp, i have no idea, dude. someday i will ask geoff about Minds Blown - 11.00pm

anyway, every time i've seen thursday this past year of having the joy of really knowing their music (i'd heard of them of course just through being in the scene for years, but had just never listened then) thursdayband has come 2 mean more and more to me and i truly hope they never stop playing together as long as it makes them happy <3

#also fun fact i am still parked down the street from the town ballroom and thursbus in the lot i always park in for shows here #it is 1:30 in the morning #the party ended 3 hours ago and he's still here #thursdayband i love you dearly #thursday band #thursday #geoff rickly #tucker rule #wavernot4love gets 2 the gig #wavernot4lovetalksmusic #do i truly not have a thursday posting tag #insane for a fella who sure does a lot of thursday posting #thursday posting #there she is #post hardcore

3 notes · View notes

libras-interactives · 11 months

Text

Hello again! Just popping in to share a little more of what I'm working on (also, say hi to all the new people! Hello!!) Thursday is crazy at work so it's the day that no writing gets done .... makes it a good time to post an update, though.

My goals for this Sunday:

Under the Devil's Moon- Rocky's scene being 50~75% complete. Compared to others, he's got a lot of variations depending on if you're platonic/romantic to him, your affection level, if you're a musician.... We know how this cat is, lol.

UtDM - The character creator is totally (finally) done. All I've got left for this is bugfixes. Making it pretty and aesthetic are for later x.x! Always room for improvements.

(If peeps are open to the idea, I'd like to make the character creator available early, just to share my excitement and get some feedback. The tons of customization options has led to Devil's Moon being a pain for my noob ass to edit... sigh. At least it's easy fixes bc they're rookie mistakes! And I love the extra options and goodies. It's just how I prefer to play and write.)

After That:

Once the Rocky scene and the closing scene of Devil's Moon is drafted, then it's just some bugfixing and testing before release! I'm so excited! I hate putting dates on things but it'll certainly be by mid to late June.

Then it's time for The Last Spring. All the content I wanted to add is already written, so it's simply coding that content, then bugfixes and more flavor text that references player customization choices a la Devil's Moon. I don't anticipate I'll have time to add intros to chapter 2 by the end of June, but I'd really love to start drafting them!! Chapter 2 itself is about 50% done, it's just... very out of order, lol. I write my favs first, what can I say? Also im so excited for the Ashara scene, and the introduction of some OCs! I think I did well.

It may seem like a lot but I think it's all doable by the end if June *knocks on wood*

Anyhoo! Thanks for popping in and reading my silly hyperfixation in real time. I love writing interactive fiction and visual novels (that blog is here), moreso than writing typical fanfic posts, so I get a little obsessed, lol. And I cant believe so much interactive fiction is just! Available on tumblr! Ive got lots of ones to check out 👁👁

#libra says #update post #interactive fiction #if:devil's moon #if:last spring

12 notes · View notes

annunnaki7 · 1 year

Text

ARE DISSABLED PEOPLE LAZY? COULD REALLY DO BETTER IF THEY TRIED HARDER? This is an example of an average bad week, like 6/10 bad on mental health and 5/10 on the physical level. Oh yea it gets so much worst! Read this and tell me how I could have improved.

MAY 2023

Sat 29.04.23

-Asthma bad all night. I coughed myself awake so often I didn't get any deep sleep.

-Fibromyalgia not happy about this, and is flaring up on its way to STOPPING FLARING up instead! 🤬 Joy! So now going to pee has extra general pain added to it.

- Allergies & Sinus bad. My nose runs non stop. Used 1/2 roll of toilet paper blowing my nose just today. And no, I don't like waisting things. Throwing meds at it.

-Managed to work with my carer, sorting paperwork. I can't help with much else anymore. I don't have the hand strength to cut a carrot. That's annoying as taking away from my autonomy.

Sun 30.04.23

- Allergies & Sinus still bad with non stop daily headaches, with migraine sometimes.

-Fibromyralgia flare. Pain feels like I feel down badement cement stairs or when I had major surgery on day 3 with 5 days hospital stay. I'm in too much pain to eat. Exhaustion worst than Covid & Pneumonia!

-Asthma bad. I have to rest for 1 minute every 10-15 meters I walk. Going to the loo takes 5 breaks.

- Urinary incontinence dissability related not happy about so many breaks to get TO the loo. I need buy more trousers! (I used 3 in one day twice this week)

- I'm in so much exhaustion & pain I can't even face watching TV. Strong painkillers increased. I'm not happy. I was hoping to decrease them this week!

Mon 01.05.23

-Migraine.

-Sinus inflamed for past 4 weeks. Related to but not only cause of migraine. I'm a migraine sufferer.

-Fibromyalgia medium flare. Hands hurt as well as eveywere else. A plate is heavy to lift. I can't stab potatoes to zap them in microwave by myself.

-Hayfever slightly improving.

-If I didn't have a carer coming to help me with a wash, I don't know how I would cope.She helped more today. She's so nice. People don't appreciate them enough.

-Concerned how I'll make hospital appointment of Thursday. And got builders in tomorrow.

Tuesday 02.05.23

-Migraine at night.

-All body pain bad. Been worst before though.

-Builders poped in to say they'll be back tomorrow. And no neither owner nor estate agents told them about all the work needing doing.

- This is in fact my comparativly, the "best day" to date. I can't sit in a chair re pain. And I have a high pain threshold. Had major surgery and got up by myself the next day when everyone else did on the 3rd day with help. Nurses said it was shocking to see me trot - carefully - about.

- Hospital appointment of tomorrow changed for latter on. It's not a vital one.

-District Nurse popped in to assess if I need to worry re swealing in legs. I'll have to go to the specialist clinic after all.

-Blood Pressure still high & Pulse going nuts. Say hi to all types of allergies as a possible cause! I take the strongest anti histamin, plus 6 over the counter allergy tablets daily. Yep, the specialist doctors advised that. It stop skin for literally falling off and other horror stories!

Wed 03.05.23

-Vomited blood all night (5hrs of hurling on off) from ulcer, blood clots included! Yuck! 3rd time in 1 month.

-Day Migraine following as haven't been able to drink much

-Im past normal exhausted as part of Fibromyalgia. It feels like I did a 14hr shift and haven't slep the next 2 nights. (Yes, I've done that in the past. Joy of nursing & midwifery whilst having dissabilities)

- Spoke to GP, meds increased. I don't want another endoscopy. Don't see what else it will tell us. It's costly to the NHS, I'm going to be in so much pain for at least 2 weeks after due to dissability, not the test. Urinary incontinence will be a pain. I'm not even for resuscitation (DNR) anyways.

-Not hungry. Disordered eating means it will kick in if I can't eat at all today. Gods even cake don't sound appealing!

- Builders back. Same thing, back tomorrow instead. But now they got the list of job.

-District Nurse decided I need compression stockings! My severe eczema might not like the extra heat in summer! & Scratchy material.

-Migraine afternoon - nightime.

-Did eat eventually. Yea me!

Thursday 04.05.23

-Food helped with migraine & dissorted eating.

- Pain and extreme exhaustion same. I can't hold a plate of food.

- Severe anxiety started in afternoon after flat owner demanding I get the garden clean that night. Message was passed to me by builder at around 4.40pm. to be done by tomorrow morning. Oh yea, I'm dissabled with poor balance, walks some 15-20 meter with 2 stick, uses wheelchair otherwise. And it would get dark even if I miraculously find someone for, ... work that's not urgent! And oh yes, there's no place to eat at the kitchen table due to building work. Like that's not a priority after builders leave rather than garden. Also. Thunder and rain so bad, I though thunder had struck nearby.

-Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) few times last night (originates from past child abuse) but attacks due to the way the flat owner and estates agent treats me.

Friday 05.05.23

-Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) exacerbated since around 2am started with the stress.

- Headaches back

- Severe anxiety rising progressively

- C-PTSD flash back early morning. Good thing I know how to manage it.

- I ate with carer, yea! Well she made me eat.

Saturday 06.05.23

-Anxiety still high

-C-PTSD same high during day, not typical of abuse. Definitely flat owner & Estates Agent related.

Sunday 07.05.23

- Actively managing the mental health side of things.

- Bad Heaches day time

- Friend brought me yummy KFC. Could only eat a tiny bit. Oh great, that's Dissordered Eating not happy with all the stress!

- Migrainy headach lasted 2-3 hrs. Resolved with management.

-Asthma attack in evening for over 2hrs. Was so rough couldn't do lung capacity measurement until finally calmed down.

- I won't be able to finish my KFC now. I'm pissed off. I'm so tired of juggling several deseases. It wouldn't be so bad of people acted like human being.

So. Do you still think I'm leisurely lying around having a relaxing time as a dissabled person?

Did you realise that it takes managing one thing after another everyday?

So everyone can do better of they "really wanted"? I really wanted to not loose my mortgage and dog. It's my dog I missed the most, not even one of my things. From a Midwife I became homeless. From working 16hrs or work followed by Union Rep work (IE talking to staff, not official meetings before you quote the law) I'm now not able to eat independently at times, or wash alone now. I'm still acting? Have a good, lazy life? You want to swap?

#Dissability Awareness #Discrimination #Ableism #disableism #health management

7 notes · View notes

ros3ybabe · 4 days

Text

Daily Check-in: April 24, 2024 🎀

Wednesday started out so rough, I had a really bad stress breakdown from the pressure I was putting on myself for the exam I have today (Thursday), but luckily my dad was able to calm me down over the phone and my boyfriend motivated me and encouraged me. I don't feel as stressed out anymore, I know that I know the material and I'll do great! (it's a chemistry exam)

🩷 What I Accomplished:

studied chemistry for a good bit

completed 3 chemistry homework assignments

scheduled a make-up quiz for my psyc class

did the Total Body Pilates video from Blogilates

did the 11 minute Wake Up Yoga from Yoga with Adriene

did my morning skincare and journaling

actually, just did my entire morning routine and felt great about it

shipped off shorts I sold on depop

went to chemistry lecture to review for the exam

went to my virtual appointment with a registered dietitian and set some goals for the next 2 weeks

decided to join a step challenge with my health insurance company to win points (they have some cool things in their points shop, plus extra steps during the day is good for my health!)

washed my laundry

made a brain dump list for the remainder of the week

💞 Good Things That Happened:

I really like the dietitian I met with and have another appointment with her in 2 weeks

I really enjoyed using my new 40oz Simple Modern insulated tumbler cup

didn't let my stress breakdown make me go home, very proud of myself for sticking to my plans

went to sleep early

sold another item on depop!

I felt very reassured that I know the content that is going to be on my upcoming exam

the guy who makes sushi at my campus food court made sushi for me and held it until I went to get it so no one would buy it, i could've cried it was so nice of him

I drank coffee on campus and it didn't hurt my stomach for once!

💔 What Could've Gone Better:

need to put less pressure on myself

had some issues with food after my dietitian appointment (sometimes thinking too much about food can be triggering for me, tbh, but my goals are nutrient based which is helpful!!)

started crying before I went to bed because I was feeling oddly emotional (I think I'm starting my period soon)

had to turn down a work shift because I had too much school stuff and that appointment (I need the money so bad tho)

did not drink near enough water

need to be more patient and gentle with myself

also need to really figure out what's going on with my priorities, I keep struggling to do the things I say I'm going to do which is difficult for me to deal with sometimes

need to remember progress over perfection, 50% is always better then doing 0% of something

💗 Stuff For Thursday

clean my room

listen to a podcast episode

maybe do some more laundry

make a grocery list

clean my bathroom

therapy today over video call

reschedule a morning appointment

chemistry exam tonight

try to ship off the shirt I sold on depop

do some more planning and organizing for my life

that's all for now! Thursdays gonna be good. My exam is gonna go great! I have confidence in myself, and my knowledge and I know I've got this!

til next time lovelies 🩷

💕 Song of The Day: Baddie by IVE

Gotta remind myself of this sometimes <3

33 notes · View notes

cetaceans-pls · 7 months

Note

I randomly think about your asexual Bruce and brujay ever since I read it months ago and it warms me up and tugs at my heart strings at the same time! I do have just one question, does Bruce finally get comfortable and realise the axe isn’t falling down next week? Do they still have their version of third Thursday? How many ways has Jason created to show this beautifully dumb middle aged man that he loves him wholly? You obviously don’t have to answer this but I hope you know I fiddle with this universe of yours in my mind at times before falling asleep, and the fact that your jason is in love with a comfortable Bruce with agency in any AU of yours. The one with the Thai food? Go fish? I’m going feral. I also adore how every single fic of yours has Jason losing his mind over Bruce aging, whether it’s the fridge of eye drops or the grey temples or the aging knees and HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME THIRST FOR THIS MIDDLE AGED MAN!! In any case I truly hope you have a wonderful day ahead and know how much joy your work brings!! I wish good things for you!

ace!bruce brujay fic: Check, Please

hi anon, thanks for this terribly kind message c: i think with time bruce goes from [jason WILL leave me one day -> jason MAY leave me one day -> i'll cross this bridge WHEN i get to it -> i'll cross this bridge IF i get to it] and he probably hits this point in his sixties but that's ok bc jason's like baby ur so dumb ur so lucky i love you (they have been dating and soppy this whole entire time)

i think w bruce feeling so iffy on what he actually brings to the table, moreso than jason making flashy gestures he instead has to long-sufferingly affectionately Endure while b tries to make it clear how much he cares (not bodily). it's getting extra edamames on the side, it's bumping up the thermostat if he gets home first (kuro49's terrible delightful banana bread canon), it's taking 2 days off of batman-ing every 3 months so they can very lovingly not have sex on a beautiful beach in Bora Bora :')

my take on bruce and jason is that they're always on opposite ends of a spectrum; at the beginning jason's not got anything to his name while bruce is borderline a man who fr has it all, and then the death happens and jason regains agency so hard not the League and not Death could hold onto him whereas bruce is so bogged down with so much trauma which drives him (he doesn't drive himself). them getting together is less about coming 'round to the other's POV, and more about going we are not the same people we do not carry the same weights and we likely never will but nevertheless we're both gonna reach out and hold on and try real hard to never let go, be as good to one another as we can manage (and we can manage a lot).

bruce being a middle-aged human guy is so funny and SO iconic of him, and i think it's another contrast with jason, which is probably why i like dropping him being an older guy with shattered feet and arthritis running rampant in stories so much. and random whale trivia, but go fish is fr fr one of my favourite things i've written, it's so SO weird and i liked the how both solemn-still and fully manic it was :')

i had a good day overall, and thank you for this ask! i'm truly so delighted that u rotate my little batman sandbox in ur mind sometimes like a rotisserie chicken! i'm always keen to hear what people perceive in my fics, bc sometimes you guys unveil things about the story or about myself i fully did not realise beforehand (gerald was jason until he was bruce!) so i do always have a good time hearing what you think of them. hope you have a great weekend!!

#whale replies #this got so long...#as evidenced by my wordcount for one shots i fr fr love to keep on going #anyways i think if i had to pick my favourites bruces-jasons #it'd be third thursdays (the original sin!!)#whatever the fuck was going on in go fish #and hrm abo!falafel and breakfastb4brunch #this is of course a nonsensical list #all my bruces-jasons are the Singular Bruce-Jason #i'd say i have quite a wide range in terms of like setting and plot and stuff #w characters though? baby it's a singularity (they're all the same guy)

3 notes · View notes

redsaurrce · 1 year

Note

i just need to get this off my chest yk, school is mentally tiring and once friday hits imma be absent for 3 weeks straight and idk what to do—no motivation or anything its simply draining. is there any words of advice you mag give to me?

When I read this the first thing that came to my head was- "dO i giVe oFf tHe viBEs oF sOmeOnE wHo CaN GiVe aDviCe oN sCHoOL?" 😭

But like if u think I'm qualified to answer this question then I've got the following to say;

School is definitely tiring... this is coming from a person who has attended her high school while waking up at 5 am to go to school and return back home by 4 pm with a 3hr extra tuition classes right after school every fucking day. There was a point where I literally went to school and only waited for it to get over cuz man I hated there.

Well.. idk how it works for u but I'd advice u that if u are struggling to keep going to school everyday and tiring urself out to death, u might want to miss a few classes in between weekdays-- which is what I had started to follow. I would skip school every Wednesday and Thursday because I focused more on attending my practical classes which used to be held on Monday, Tuesday and Friday. Sat and Sun used to be holidays so that was a bonus.

Because practicals needed equipments which wouldn't be available in a normal house (unless ur parents are interested in keeping microscope or potentiometers at home LOL) so I attended school on those days (or mightve skipped even those days sometimes and then in the next class i would approach the teacher in the corner and request them to brief me over what they have taught in the last practical class). For the theory I didn't really had to attend school since I could cover that up in my tuitions or self study.

I think you can do something similar, mark the days which has the most important classes, u can even attend alternate days in consecutive weeks. For example if you follow the calendar in mobile phones, you can track week numbers of the year, now divide them into odd weeks and even weeks.

On odd weeks u can attend on Mon, Wed and Fri

On even weeks u can on attend Tue and Thurs

For example the current week number is 12 which is even and today is Wednesday so it's ur 2nd school day of the week, right?

So.. according to me, missing out 2 or 3 days a week is far better than missing out 3 weeks straight because not only you will be detached from the current situation of your syllabus of what's being taught in the class, this can also feed into ur demotivation era of yk.. thinking that oh no maybe u have missed out a lot so what are u gonna do now? Is it over? Stuff like that! And negative thinking truly sucks.

Also do not forget to take care of urself and keep urself hydrated time to time, sometimes water is all u need to stay alert.

And if u ever sit down to study and think- ugh what if I can't do this or that, trust me- at that very moment open ur book and set a timer of 10 minutes. In those ten minutes, just study and do nothing else. After that u can do whatever u want (but ik ur brain will choose to study a little bit more!)

#hmm... lmk if u find/found this useful anon or if u have something else to ask :)#sweet anon 💟#asks 💟

3 notes · View notes

andyouweremine · 1 year

Text

I posted 1,499 times in 2022

70 posts created (5%)

1,429 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@absentlyabbie

@gffa

@perioddramasource

@obscure-sentimentalist

@itwaswhileyouweresleeping

I tagged 1,115 of my posts in 2022

Only 26% of my posts had no tags

#star wars - 98 posts

#nancy drew - 72 posts

#nancy x ace - 67 posts

#bridgerton - 44 posts

#persuasion 2022 - 33 posts

#kris writes - 27 posts

#obi wan disney - 27 posts

#obi wan spoilers - 26 posts

#leverage - 21 posts

#legacies - 21 posts

Longest Tag: 115 characters

#like i've been on this earth 30+ years and i've never understood going out and having sex with a practical stranger

My Top Posts in 2022:

and now you're beside me (and look how far we've come)

(5107 words) by always_a_queen

Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Nancy Drew (TV 2019)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Relationships: Ace/Nancy Drew

Characters: Nancy Drew, Ace (Nancy Drew)

Additional Tags: Forehead Kisses, 5 Times, Mild Sexual Content, Slow Dancing, Slow Burn, Requited Love, Post-Season/Series 02

Summary:

When the door creaks open sometime in the late afternoon, she assumes it’s her dad. Figuring he’ll assume she’s asleep—she’s trying to, her throat feels raw and her head is pounding—Nancy doesn’t bother to lift her head to look. It’s only when she hears her name spoken softly that she realizes the person who just came in is not Carson Drew. Or Ryan Hudson. It’s Ace.

Or: Five times Ace Kisses Nancy on the Forehead.

24 notes - Posted January 19, 2022

sometimes a family is an ordinary redhead bartender, the heir to the magic world’s mafia, the kid whose parents own hogwarts, the orphan with literal inner demons, and the most notorious rogue of all time who is no-so-secretly a marshmallow

29 notes - Posted January 3, 2022

Rating: General Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: F/M

Fandom: Nancy Drew (TV 2019)

Relationship: Ace/Nancy Drew

Characters: Ace (Nancy Drew), Nancy Drew

Additional Tags: Episode Fix-it, Fix-It, Morse Code, Requited Love, no beta we die like nancy's moms

Summary:

Before Nancy puts her hand on that knife, before Ace blips back into existence and she wraps her arms tight around him, before all of that, Nancy feels the faint tapping again.

It’s not Ace’s name this time or even a foggy explanation of what happened to him.

It’s just dot-dot, then a pause. Enough time for Nancy to fill in the letter. I. Then, dot-dash-dot-dot. L.

Ill? Illegal? Illegitimate?

Three dashes, and her heart is in her throat. That’s an O.

---

Post 3.10, "The Confession of the Long Night". There's one more thing Ace needs to tell Nancy before he blips out of existance.

30 notes - Posted January 15, 2022

So the last time I got sick and ran to the store for supplies I bought extra and made myself an Emergency Sick Kit, and I know this sounds super simple and adult, but MAN it’s was such a lifesaver this week when my throat started hurtling last Thursday.

In the kit:

Canned Chicken Noodle Soup (put in bowl, put bowl in microwave, let brothy soup soothe sore throat). I’ve also snagged chicken and rice, potato soup, tomato soup, anything easily sipable or something that wouldn’t irritate my throat.

Jello (pour in bowl, pour hot water in bowl, stir, pour cold water in bowl, stir, throw in fridge overnight, enjoy soft goodness on sore throat) (honestly, jello works better for me to relieve some of the throat ache than a lot of things)

Applesauce (decent shelf life. rotate out. pour. enjoy. fridge after opening.)

I also like oatmeal as it’s filling and easy on my throat and I can put honey in it. I never see it mentioned as a sick-food, but I like it and it lasts well. I eat it fairly regularly for breakfast so whenever I get a new box from the store I rotate the old stuff out.

Saltines. (for the stomach upsets)

Ginger ale. (also for the stomach upsets)

Tea. (my throat and I swear by this one) (and honey if you want it)

Cough drops. (a brand you like and or find helpful. I like Ricola, personally)

Vaseline or other ointment or Chapstick (for that ow between your nose and upper lip from blowing your nose all the time)

Emergen-C. You may also want Gatorade. If you like Gatorade. Which I do not, really. You might also want just regular vitamin C.

Over the counter cold meds. You know what you like to use/what works well for you. Ask your doctor or pharmacist if you’re taking other medications so there are no negative interactions.

I also, having had sinus issues in the past, 100% recommend using a Neti-pot or other sinus rinse because MAN it helps SO MUCH. I like the squeeze bottles.

Vicks vapo-rub. I’ve yet to try the lavender but it sounds WAY more pleasant.

Hand Sanitizer. (especially if you live with another person. sharing is not caring)

Thermometer.

I’d also recommend any other easy-to-make foods if you’re cooking for yourself. I used the sore throat friendly foods while I had the sore throat, and then once the sickness morphed more into more congestion I went for other simples, like pb&j.

Anyway, being sick sucks, but being sick and feeling like you need to run to the store while sick sucks more so instead of doing that just prepare with a little at a time per-grocery run and then when The Sickness Hits you’ll have an arsenal of things to feel better.

58 notes - Posted October 18, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Librarians of tumblr, recently my (public, not school) library introduced self-checkout, which I’ve been using because pandemic. (They also have the option for no-contact-pickup, which I have also used periodically. I call in, read off my library card, and they bring my holds items out onto a table outside.)

The self-checkout is just SO easy, especially if I’m running in to pick up something I didn’t put a hold on. I just scan my card and put my books/media on a little reader and it checks them out for me and emails me my receipt.

My concern is: Will this negatively impact librarians jobs? Is it better for me to call in and do no-contact pick-up, or take my books to the front desk for a librarian to check out? Or is this a ‘no, because of pandimic your librarians probably appreciate you using the self check out, but once it stops go back to using the front desk’?

Genuinely curious because I love my librarians and my library and want to keep them around.

460 notes - Posted January 17, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

1 note · View note