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#anyways…I still have some vacation time planned so the next update will also be somewhat delayed
lilybug-02 · 4 months
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You’re making a lot of promises there Chara…
Part 24 || First || Previous || Next
—Full Series—
I enjoyed doing this little Flashback scene. We’ll be back to our regularly scheduled freakout session soon. Having monochrome color is very nice.
Here is a gif of Chara spilling their water because YES. And I spent way too long on it :)
Wow technology is so cool.
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ssreeder · 10 months
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ALSKFJG to be fair Reedy i for one am not complaining about the length over here, there's a thrill to each update. Idk if I've mentioned before that the first thing i do when I'm scrolling through ao3 is to set my filters tl show only complete works. I'm not strong enough to deal with uncompleted works, but at the same time, if i go on too long like that, i end up missing the thrill of just... Going along for the ride, checking when there's an update, hyping myself uo when there IS and I'm not ready to deal with it, taking a moment to breathe after i read it, get lost in the possibilities of what's to come until the next chapter comes out
Like... It is fun, to be able to enjoy a story to it's fullest extent, and there's a certain joy that can't be replicated by reading it all in one sitting, a joy that comes from having to sit with what you have and *wonder*
And BOI am i fucking wondering what's going to happen, i have a ticking time bomb stressing me out constantly in the form of a somewhat unhinged but ultimately baby 14 year old called Azula, and meanwhile zuko is sneaking into sokka's bedroom and I'm just here sitting watching reading knowing that's just BEGGING for trouble bc WHAT IF SOMEONE COMES IN, and also toph absolutely knows bc she literally can feel the extra heartbeat but she minds the business that pays her
I hope it's that, anyways, and not toph waiting for the moment to bully sokka, which i WOULD appreciate but... I wouldn't wish to be sokka for that if that's the plan. And talking about bullying. JET JET JET JET. You've got me over here stressed out for jet waking up bc like... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH. PAIN. I WANT HIS PAIN. I CRAVE HIS SUFFERING. I NEED TO SEE WHAT HE'LL DO NOW. Reedy what have you done to me. You have me rooting for jet. In a twisted backwards way but still
And katara deserves the world, she has no idea what's coming and god will she hate it but she's doing her best she deserves some vacations. They're not coming tho. Bc as soon as jet wakes up to cause problems on purpose she'll probably find out zukka is a thing and she still doesn't like zuko so the poor girl is bound for whiplash and then the water tribe is getting into ba sing se but not for long! Because Azula is a menace and she's out for blood and i oove her but that kid needs to be adopted soon before she burns the world (is she going to get adopted? Puppy eyes over here begging for her to be adopted. She'd look great in water tribe blue) (i know that's not what this story is about but a guy can dream ok?)
Anyways. This is what you do when you leave me to think about the future of the story for too long. The possibilities are simmering in my brain
-Fragile heart
Hahaha - well we are officially on this journey together pal! Im glad you hopped on before we got to the end lol.
Im confident a certain earth bender knows that a certain highly strung fire bender is sneaking in through the window at night. Im sure she is just waiting for the right time to commence the teasing.
Jets awakening won’t be next chapter but the one after that! (I couldn’t fit it all this next chapter haha) but it’ll be a mess I can assure you that.
Katara isn’t getting a break anytime soon! & no I’m sure she won’t be THRILLED to find out about zukka mostly because her interaction with Zuko doesn’t go so smoothly next chapter ha……. Oops
As for azula…. Hmmm….. we’ll see ;)
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lananiscorner · 1 year
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Fanfic, Darksiders Week and streaming - my goals for 2023
Hello everyone!
2022 has been a strange year for me, but it is almost over. I would like to apologize to everyone who had been waiting for Darksiders Week 2022--every time I started preparations, something came up in RL and it never got anywhere. I also wrote very little this year and I would like to apologize to anyone who has been waiting for updates to my published WIPs.
With that said, here is the plan for 2023:
Darksiders Week 2023 This will likely happen sometime during July/August. I am hoping to expand it to Reddit and Discord this year, and possibly Twitter if it’s still around by that point. More info will follow @ darksiders-week.
Fanfic updates I am currently working on a mostly wholesome Rhea & Flayn centric post-AM multi chapter fic that I had been mulling over for a while. I am aiming to publish the first one or two chapters on January 11th (Rhea’s birthday). After that, I will return to Conversations of a Lion Prince and my two as of yet unpublished Silver Snow and Crimson Flower one-shots. I am also aiming to publish chapter 4 of Rider of the White Horse in time for Darksiders Week (and chapter 5 if I can manage).
I will stream again! Some of you may already have seen me stream Batman and Darksiders at Twitch under the name LananiTwitch. I will be streaming under the same name again, this time with camera and a much better setup, likely every Saturday and Sunday around 7 PM Central European (Summer) Time, hopefully starting sometime in late January. I will start with a 100% Azure Moon playthrough of FE3H, and after that, I’ll let a random number picker decide which of the 200+ games I own will be next. And yes, Darksiders and Batman: Arkham are on that list. :)
I will have my own Discord! This will happen around the same time I start streaming again, and will mainly be so we can chat about the games I streamed, and what happened during the streams. Of course you are still welcome to contact me via DM or ask here, but I find Discord easier for discussions and I have an account there anyway, so I want to offer it as another avenue of communication.
Personal updates I will likely move to another country (again) sometime around April or May. Also, now that Covid is somewhat under control and the tourism industry had a year to recover a bit, I will hopefully have an actual two week vacation again, so likely there will be a total of 4-5 weeks in 2023 when I will only be online very sporadically and also not streaming. I will give a heads-up, of course. I am also planning to get a foster cat once I’ve moved, followed by two forever kitties. :)
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miekasa · 3 years
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mie!! i’m so late to the party but i absolutely loved ‘NICE’, it made me feel so warm and fuzzy <33 it’s so unique to its own and the flow of it is beyond wonderful!
what is married life like for oc and eren in ‘NICE’? is it just like before/do you have any nice!husband!eren headcanons?
AHH I’m so happy you liked it and that you took the time to come and tell me!! Married life for them... doesn’t really differ from what their lives looked like before actually hehe. They were basically married without knowing it 🙄🙄 idiots to lovers or something like that; but here are a few head canons of the months immediately following NICE!
You officially got married in Paris on the fourth, not too long after Carla’s wedding. You guys flew in some officials, checked through all the technicalities, and signed the papers right on top of the Eiffel Tower (access granted by the city of Paris upon request of one Carla Jaeger, of course). 
Aside from having the most picturesque location in the world to sign your marriage certificate, there wasn’t anything lavish in celebration after that. Carla’s wedding was just three days earlier, after all, and was still the talk of the local press. You did have a small party with your friends (Jean, Armin, Mikasa, Marco, Erwin, Levi, Hange came from the Alps for Carla’s wedding) in your overly large hotel room. Just some music, room service, and lots and lots of champagne.
Eren extended your winter break vacation by two weeks for an impromptu honeymoon to the Bahamas before you went home. Let’s just say you did not leave the safe haven of your hotel room very often, except to dip into the ocean a few nights (benefits of a private beach).
After getting married, the rings swapped places; the band with diamonds previously on your pointer finger was put on a chain (a new one since Eren threw the other one on the ground 💀), and you now wear the engagement ring on your ring finger.
Eren doesn’t like it when you take off the ring (the ring being the engagement ring). The first time you were going into the water, you were going to put it on the chain for safekeeping, but he protested very strongly. He would rather it rest safely in your suitcase than go around your neck again.
Your wedding bands are actually very similar to the band you already have: gold and diamond encrusted. Eren’s, however, has an emerald in the center, like the two emeralds that serve as the pistils of the sunflowers in your engagement ring (for reference, that ring looks something like this, but with a gold band). The bands were the first thing Eren bought when you guys got home.
Your friends in Dubai (Ymir, Reiner, Annie, Connie, Sasha) had no idea that you and Eren got married over winter break. Safe to say they were all… very surprised to hear the news. Connie was a little bit bitter because he missed it, and wolf whistles every time he sees your ring (even though he’s seen it before because you wore it on the necklace every day).
You got married in January, but have an official wedding in the process of being planned sometime around late summer/early fall. Carla insisted that you guys have a wedding despite already being married, and Eren agreed whole heartedly. They are both very into planning it, and yes, Eren is somewhat of a bridezilla, and his mom is enabling him 100% please.
The night you signed the wedding papers, Carla lent you an off-white satin couture gown from one of her past collections. She is designing and making your official wedding dress by hand, with the help of Mikasa.
The two of them are also making Eren’s suit, and all the outfits for your wedding party. Carla will murder you if you even so much as hint at just buying other suits/dresses. This is her baby’s wedding, and she runs one of the most renowned fashion houses of the modern century; she’ll be damned if you guys wear something off the rack.
You considered a destination wedding, but settled on having it in New York. You haven’t decided a location yet, and it’s the one thing Eren isn’t actually picky about (because you know he’s gonna go ham on the decor no matter where it is bye).
Jean doesn’t know it yet, but he’s your maid of honor. Good luck and best of wishes to Eren picking between Mikasa and Armin for best man.
Even before confessing and getting married, Eren never slept much in his own bedroom. You both have California king sized beds in your rooms, and more often than not, Eren would sleep with you in your bed. You didn’t always cuddle, but he just liked to be there (for your presence, and because he was grossly in love bye)… you ended up cuddling a lot of the time tho.
He wants to renovate your apartment now that you both “officially” live in the same bedroom, even though it’s not necessary. He just likes renovating things.
You guys go to dinner every weekend, and sometimes you even go dancing. Eren still can’t dance and he doesn’t actually care to learn; it just reminds him of being in Nice with you.
He kisses your ring finger every morning waking up and every night before going to bed; sometimes he even does it subconsciously in his sleep.
He holds your hand way more often. Not just because you guys are together now, but because he likes seeing the ring where it’s meant to be. He also notices that it helps to curb your anxiety, which is a good bonus.
Eren wants kids, but he hasn’t really brought it up yet. He knows you both are fairly young, and that you’re still technically in school, but that’s not really a deterrent for him.
The only reason he’s waiting to say something is because you guys have a lot going on with wedding planning and settling in to “married life”—there’s a lot of tedious paperwork to be done and documents to update. He’ll bring it up next year when all that is settled.
On the subject of school, you are still attending university, but have been eligible for graduation for a year now. You had enough credits to graduate last (the year before NICE) December, but there were a few more classes you wanted to take out of interest that hadn’t been running in past years, so you stayed for all four years. Eren picks you up from your lectures.
Eren graduated in December before you guys went on vacation. By normal standards, that’s a semester early. However, he was supposed to be in this Honors Arts and Sciences program, that should have taken him another two semesters. He decided it wasn’t worth it, and dropped the honors part, and with that, had enough credits to graduate, so he did.
A college degree is really more of an accessory for him anyway, and school was never his thing. He’s decently smart, sure, but he never enjoyed school because of the emphasis on exams; he’s more of a creative person, a dreamer if you will. The only reason he even went to Columbia was because you decided to go there. 
He and you both have enough money to live more than comfortably if neither of you decided to get a job after graduation… way more than enough/ But Eren isn’t doing nothing; he’s actually sorta been working his way into the world of professional interior design, and he really loves it. You’re proud of him, and more than anything, happy that he decided to go for something he loves.
Armin and Jean also graduated a semester early. Armin’s been living with Mikasa since Connie got his own place off-campus in January. Jean is a little upset blondie is living with his girlfriend before he is, but it’s whatever 🙄if it’s gonna be anyone, at least it’s Armin. 
Carla mentioned that Eren got married sometime during a NYFW interview (along with talking about her own recent marriage), and since then you both have interviewed for two magazines, one of which featured pictures from your smaller party in Paris. You’ve gotten requests from Vanity Fair and Vogue about your bigger wedding later in the year, but you guys haven’t invited any media officials as of yet.
You and Eren attend the MET Gala almost every year. You don’t walk the red carpet and nobody is scrambling to take your pictures; but you have passes because of Carla. Also, you could just buy your way in if you wanted you (and your friends have in the past). This year, Eren had to pay two security officers $10k in bribes because you two snuck away to fuck in… a part of the museum not sectioned off for the event. Whoopsies.
Even before Eren got him arrested, going out to brunch was kind of your and Armin’s thing. Eren insists he should be invited now that he’s your husband. He is not. (His bitterness grows when he learns that Jean has secured himself an invite somehow).
Eren sold the car he got arrested for drag racing in. He never told you why—and as far as transportation goes, it wasn’t a big deal because you guys have other cars—but, to him, it was a kind of symbol. He thinks it’s dumb if he thinks too long about it, but he just didn’t wanna have that there are a reminder of how he’d hurt you and his mom.
Jean still drives you to your therapy appointments, but now Eren picks you up. Eren also goes to therapy himself, and has been before you guys got married; his therapist says he’s undoubtedly happier in recent sessions… like a weight’s been lifted off his shoulder.
As far as drugs go, there’s, of course, weed on a happy occasion, or at a party; but he hasn’t touched coke since that one time (which was also the first time he’d ever done it). That’s not even him being a changed man, he just didn’t like it—he only argued with you about it because he was being stubborn. He’s more of a drinker than anything, and absolutely loves to get you drunk on a special occasion, too; he always has. He thinks you look cute, and he likes taking care of you.
You have lived in that apartment with Eren for years before marrying him, yet he insisted you needed to christen the place like it was brand new… at this point, the only places you haven’t fucked in are the elevator itself, the foyer, the storage closet, and the pool. The latter only because it’s been too cold in NYC… trust and believe pool sex is coming lmfao.
Eren bought the apartment and renovated and designed it, but he never did like being in it all alone, and that’s been magnified since you got married. If he’s there by himself, he’s usually in the living area, napping on the daybed. He waits for your faithfully every day, and is hardly in the bedroom if you’re not.
Eren has not stopped introducing you as his wife since January. Even to people in passing like cashiers and bartenders, everyone in the whole damn city probably knows you guys got hitched.
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swiftgronmasterpost · 4 years
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The Speak Now Tour - Feb 9, 2011 – Mar 18, 2012 (and flashback to 2008-2010 to introduce Liz and TayLiz)
Update from November 2021 - Hey guys it’s Cam!  I have come around to seeing most of Red is actually about Jake Gyllenhaal and I fully believe Taylor to simply be bisexual.  I don’t really think she had anything romantic or sexual with Liz but it’s possible.  I’m leaving this section here just to show Taylor was busy with other people during this time and the song writing receipts.  If you want to know more about Jake, who I am now basically certain is the red break up muse you can read a timeline here and listen to a podcast episode about it here.
So what’s Taylor up to while Dianna is outing herself, traveling the world, and holding hands with Lea Michele?
She’s out on the Speak Now tour with one Liz Huett.  It’s hard to know the exact nature of their relationship but there are a few pieces of info from Taylor’s tour blog and vlogs that could suggest they had something more than friendship.
They meet well before the Speak Now tour and Liz makes quite an impression on Taylor:
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Liz joins the band for the Fearless Tour and they have a lot of fun, room together, and seem to be quite close:
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The most suspicious post of all - Liz and Taylor are sharing a hotel room on tour:
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So I checked in with Shawn (one of my contacts in the industry, she dated a famous singer and learned QUITE a bit about how musicians function and the PR surrounding them, ect.) and here’s what she had to say about a singer of Taylor’s caliber at that time sharing a hotel room with a backup singer:
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This alone is frankly enough to convince me that they were something beyond friends/co-workers.
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2-22-2010 entry has several more photos of Liz:
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5/19/2011 - Tay and Liz are on the Speak Now tour at this point and Taylor cooks for her
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So now we can flash forward to the summer of the Speak Now Tour - Taylor takes all the girls from the tour on a vacation:
8-22-2011 (RIGHT before she meets with Dianna in public for the first time)
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Turns out they may have been sharing a bed? or at least joking about it:
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Liz posted a birthday message (now deleted) to taylor about that very trip in 2015 and insinuates that Taylor planned the whole trip just for her! 
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Here’s some more general Tiz content:
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Did they have something?  Perhaps on and off during the Fearless Tour and then again during the Speak Now Tour?
It’s hard to say.  There are other rumors surrounding Taylor and Claire (one of her backup dancers) and Taylor and Caitlin (her fiddle player that replaced Emily) along with Taylor and Julianne Hough.  But the person with the most amount of content seems to be Liz.
I do suspect she may be referencing Taylor in her music and she even gives a befuddled blonde girl a kiss at the end of her H8U music video:
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Some of Liz’s lyrics seem to almost blatantly reference Taylor:
“Never Know” - released November 2012 - might be about Taylor>> “It’s crazy how life goes on / And then I catch myself singing your song / And wonder if you think about me / I guess we’ll never know”
“Don’t LV U Anymore” - released some time in 2018 - “I don’t steal your chapstick anymore / Don’t wake up to your kiss anymore / And I don’t have a washer and dryer full of guitar picks anymore / ‘Cause you don’t come over to my place anymore / … / I don’t love you anymore / I don’t love you anymore / I don’t love you anymore / But I don’t love you any less” (seems to describe their relationship post 2012 or so however Liz was at the Rep tour, perhaps seeing Taylor triggered old memories for her to write a song about her)
Other songs that might be about Taylor include:
So Easy
Dammit - Jana Kramer (written by Liz) Talks about a lover playing guitar in the kitchen.
STFU and Hold Me – about a “rocky and volatile” relationship. Liz paints herself as a cheater in the MV and wears Red throughout the whole thing. The lyric “it started with a bang, went all in” is similar to Holy Ground’s “took off faster than a green light go.” Seems very similar to the relationships described in Red.
And here’s some discussion on Reddit about why Liz left Taylor’s band:
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Sounds like a girl that was Trouble don’t you think?
Check out the blog @taylizmasterpost​ for more on this interesting and less explored Gaylor ship!
Anyway...the point of all of this before we get back to the timeline is to show that Taylor very well may have been involved with LIz and the nature of that relationship does seem to match some of the drama described in the breakup songs on Red.
Back to the timeline now:
June 10, 2011:  Taylor is emo on the Speak Now Tour:
“In Detroit, Swift seemed somewhat melancholy. Once in a while, I had the feeling that she was on the verge of bursting into tears. She said that she had recently decided that life is “about achieving contentment. . . . You’re not always going to be ridiculously happy.” She had written about ten songs so far for her next album[i counted 8].  Asked to characterize them, she said, “They’re sad? If I’m being honest.” The most recent one, she said, “is about moving on.”(x)
So here we learn that Taylor has written 8-10 sad songs for the Red album.  As far as we know she’s never even met Dianna and Dianna is still very obviously involved with Lea.
June 11, 2011 - Shirtgate!
Lover Diary Entry during the Speak Now Tour where Taylor is super happy for some reason On June 17, 2011:
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I propose that whatever Taylor is so happy about is not related to Dianna because on the 16th Dianna reaches out to Lea during Somebody To Love and then on the 17th they are back holding hands happily.
Conclusion - While Achele appears to be very on during the summer of 2011 it also seems completely possible that Tayliz was on during the Speak Now Tour as well.  If Tayliz went on for a while during the Fearless Tour and then halted and then started back up again during the Speak Now Tour could it be the inspiration for some of the chaotic breakup songs on Red?  I think it’s very possible.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go read @taylizmasterpost​ for more on this amazing ship!
Click here to keep reading!
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shesawriter39049 · 4 years
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|ROLL DEEP|M| P.1
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                 *Yoongi centered fic with a shared OT7 plot*
CH.1.1   CH. 1.2
**Operation: What’s eating blue!?***
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“Stop, this stopped being a you, thing and became a us thing  the minute we chose to show up here tonight! You gave us an out and we stayed...we will always stay...”
1.2 K Sneak Peek
Pairing: Yoongi x OC
Genre: Sugar baby AU/Suspense/Smut/Angst/Roomate AU/FWB AU
WC: 7K
Nonsexual Warnings: Mentions of drug use (Molly/weed/)Strong language/ Alcohol addictions/ brief mentions/ speculations of domestic violence/abuse
Sexual Warnings: Oral (M & F receiving) power bottom Min Yoongi, cum play, breath play, spanking, dirty talk, Slight overestimation, sex toys (Cock rings....) Semi-public sex (A chill little blow job in the car) The sexual warnings are for both parts of CH.1 so the smut is split in half!
NOTE:  Just to clarify the dynamic Yoongi and the OC are roommates who hookup on the side, they are BOTH sugar babies to two separate people! So yes, that would imply that Yoongi and some of the other boys who are also sugar babies are Bi. There is no MxM but there is mentions of it occasionally….as well as some harmless ot7 flirting! Also all of the boys are introed, Tae and Joon just play a lager part here!
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I guess, fuck where do we even start? Maybe, will go back to where it all technically started, which was the last time things felt...somewhat normal yeah?
So, that would be...hmm...about 2 weeks shy of you heading into Junior year at USC right? The day your boys picked you up at the airport, and the three of your treated Blue, aka TaeTae to brunch!?
Well, wait let’s back track a little it all started much eariler than that, because you weren’t even aware of your brunch plans until later in the day. So Initially the day in question kicks of with you, in oversized blacked out CHLOE shades, hungover as fuck, sat in at the airport one Sunday afternoon. Smack dab in the middle of Terminal 6, in a bar called Blu2o sipping on a Bloody Mary, scrolling aimlessly through Snapchat. While simotaniously being told for the very first time ...that you’ll be attending a “Haute Couture”  themed charity auction...on Tuesday! Yup,  the day after tomorrow! Thank god he can’t see your damn face right now, biting down on your straw to muzzle yourself!
“No, babe it’s fine, I’ll just hit Rodeo tomorrow morning, and I’m sure my nail and lash girl can fit me-Oh you...haven’t gotten... what ...your wearing either?” Parroting the words back In slow motion as if it would make the words sound better or something!
Oh for fucks sake! Bringing your forehead flush to the marble bartop already feeling a full blown migraine brewing at the nape of your neck. Giving yourself a couple moments to self compose, this man is so damn unorganized it’s unfucking real. His personal assistant better be the 2nd highest paid person within his entire company because…..This is far from new, I don’t even know why your suprised and I’d say you don’t get paid enough for this....but ya do! So you suck it up, lose the attitude and slip right into your “Yes sir” or maybe I should say ‘Yes daddy” voice.
“Don’t worry about it, I know your busy. I totally get it, your a 28 waist right? Of course, I remember...I remember everything you tell me….Ohhh your gonna let me put you in color too???” Eyes flickering up to the notification from your bank, noting a cute little 12k wire pending.
“Yeah, no, I see it, that should be good. I was thinking Versace or Cavili for you anyway...they have good prints to fit the theme, and if all else fails I have my card too…yup..just landed about..hmm... 30 minutes ago actually. Of course, stop apologizing, Sunday's are always your golf days, I get it, hey, tell the guys I said hi and enjoy your day. Text me later if you feel up to it..k....bye..”
Were you actually getting a little flustered there towards the end? It's the slight accent, isn't it? Honestly, it didn't take much for you to slip into “character” with him, even after barely being together a full month. For one he wasn’t an asshole, had a decent sense of humor, and he’s really fuckin hot...however there was one, little, well shit, not so little issue...you noticed while with him recently. Which, then sparked quite a few questions while also answering some that had been rattling through your head since the day you met. But will circle back to the fact that you spent a week on vacation with a man, while dressed in some of the sexiest pieces of 2019 couture! Yet..you barely got touched once outside of a couple chaste kisses and hand-holding while at the two fashion shows you attended together… so, yeah, yeah!
A low groan in frustration rattled from your throat as you continued scrolling through Snapchat, trying to come up with some possible outfit scenarios in your head! It’s kinda funny, how mynute all of that seems now though, how your definition of “Stress” that day was you trying to decide if your sugar daddy was gay, while also  finding time to fit in a self-care day, shopping, and getting your books for school!!  The fact that, that was what you considered migraine worthy, fuck, what you wouldn’t give to consider multitasking your only maltitude of “stress” again …..
Just in your own little world, mind swirling with a couple of stylists you’ve met along the way, considering the idea of them pulling some vintage pieces for you instead!  What you should be doing, is scrolling through your contact list and texting said stylists, instead you find yourself more and more distracted.  Getting lost in the mounds of snap updates from Jimin as he “modestly” sunbathed in a private villa in Italy. Then later sharing a glimpse into his shopping spree from Versace, no doubt a good 20k worth of Italian luxury spread out along the plush white sheets. Sending him a cheeky little “That’s my boy” with a couple of smug winky faces in response!
It’s still kinda crazy to think, things like that are considered normal within your world now, the fact that you aren’t even surprised at the number of gifts. Or, simply the fact that your barley 21-year-old best friend is sunbathing in Italy on someone else’s dime. Then again, you just got sent 12 thousand dollars to spend on an event that would last maybe all of 5 hours, while sitting next to a stack of Louis Vuittion luggage from your first class flight in from Vegas, technically. Opting to land there first after a long 15-hour flight, checking in at The Four Seasons for not even a solid 24 hours before coming home! Honestly?There was no real reason for the pit stop except it gave you an excuse to see a friend while also allowing you to unwind in one of your favorite hotels!
That sentence alone is actually absurd when you really think about it, the idea of you casually booking flights and suites in 5-star hotels as if you’re ordering off the damn dollar menu at Mcdonalds! You, the girl that was working two jobs at the Groove and mourning a piece of shit cheating ex boyfriend her freshman year of college.....is now reminiscing about catching flights to chill with friends and last minute finding dresses for Couture themed galas.Like, what the actual fuck is life.... Oh my bad, life at the moment is constantly being paranoid that you and your friends will get arrested! Life in this moment however...was a fucking perfect!
The friend you where meeting in Vegas was Hoseok by the way, the redhead was currently vacationing in Sin City for the next couple of days, typically residing in LA as well. Just Chillin’ before the semester starts, living his best life, which revolves around “OFF-WHITE'' shopping sprees, private dance lessons, and constantly taking thirst trap pics for his 10’s of thousands of followers online. He randomly texts you saying “I miss your face” you text him saying “I land at 8 tonight bring a bottle and sushi to room 605 at The Four Seasons hotel '' Simple!
Your initial flight, the one that was 15 hours, was originally from Paris, where you spent the last week or so with Jeong-su, being arm candy, sipping wine, sightseeing and of course shopping!. Barley 32 hours ago your Snapchat looked pretty damn similar, if not worse in comparison to Jimin’s but what can I say, you can’t be in the home of Givenchy and Gaulthier and not go to Givenchy and Gaultier!
What your life is, what you and your friends do, I mean, I think it’s safe to say it’s pretty self-explanatory yeah? The average 20 something-year-old in college isn't flying themselves out of the country or going luxury shopping without a little help. In your case, it’s typically thanks to a person you commonly refer to as “Daddy” now, the context behind the word however….is where you and your friends may differ from others…..
But that’s your business, your concern and more importantly your choice, and honestly for a while life seemed too damn good to be true...I guess looking back on it now, I guess that’s because it kinda was!
Sat at the predominantly empty bar alone, more than content by the silence, twirling your straw between your lips, as you scanned back over the shit show that was your schedule for the semester! Getting more of a migraine from that, then shopping or even the fact that you're still hungover and drinking on an empty stomach at half-past 12. Shooting a quick text to your redheaded best friend cursing him out for getting you drunk off your ass on a bottle of Yamazaki 12.
“Can I get anything else for you beautiful? Another drink or maybe an appetizer? We have damn good loaded queso fries if I do say so myself!” Waving the menu in your face playfully, the warm, inviting voice in front of you was the bartender, who’s had his eye on you since you swayed in. Even if you looked like crap for your standards you knew to most you were the farthest thing from it as you swayed into the bar like you owned the place. In your heels, and tiny little black dress, while an airport assistant trolied in your luggage behind you! Ohhh Blair  Waldorf would without a doubt be proud!
“Mmmm…” Lips pursed in a slight pout as you raked over the menu, honestly, you were hungry and they have bomb ass fried pickles…..”Actually, yeah, I’ll get-”
“ 3 tall shots of whatever top-shelf Tequila you have, also add whatever she’s been drinking to my tab, along with an order of fried pickles with extra ranch…please and thank you!” Smoothly sliding his black card, and ID across the marble bartop for review.
Oh.
The look on the bartender’s face was fucking priceless, torn between shitting himself and maybe….nah, just straight shitting himself! Skin flushed, the sense of panic was clear as day,  wondering if he’d overstepped that fine line between customer service and filtration. Considering whoever the person behind you is, clearly knows you well enough to know your food order. A forced bashful smile playing along his lips as he bowed out in acknowledgment, sliding the gentelmen back is ID and whispering out a faint “Yes sir, coming right up…”
The base vibrating through your ears instantly had you readjusting your posture, a strong tingle running down your spine, back arching ever so slightly. A playful smirk playing along your lips as you slowly laced your tongue back around your staw, tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear.
“You sure you wanna do that? My tastes are pretty expensive..” Tone blatantly flirtatious, yet you still hadn’t bothered to even turn around, that’s when suddenly you hear a deep arrogant chuckle rumbling low in his chest. Only...this sounds a little brighter? And like it’s coming from your left instead of behind you…
“Mmm, I’m sure we can handle it baby….”
You could feel the air shift behind you, it felt warmer, and there was a strong mix of scents flooding through your nose. Leaning back in your seat, pleasantly finding your shoulders, the back of your neck, and your head, cradled against a lean wall of silk. Sighing contently, naturally letting your body melt into his frame, nose running into your face as you smiled so hard your cheeks hurt. That’s when a gangle of veiny, porcelain limbs wrapped around your shoulders pulling you even tighter against him, only to find brown, sharp, cat-like eyes staring down at you, though a pair of translucent designer shades. Seemingly a little bit amused at how excited you are to see him. Long dark wavy locks falling messily into his face, a tiny silver hoop dawning his button nose. Tongue playing at the corner of his mouth, letting the tiny silver ball slip between his lips. This angle lets you really appreciate how sharp, yet soft his features were, an oxymoron that honestly makes no damn sense unless you see him in person….jawline sharp enough to cut glass yet he has the cutest cheeks ever when he smiles. It honestly makes no sense whatsoever and he’s one of the many reasons you have trust issues. Well, that and your line of work, considering the number of men you find out are married and still try and sneak around with you.
Then, as if to just make his presence known, there’s another pair of hands making their home along your body, gently squeezing your thigh. Except, he’s polar opposite to the person I just described, the man behind you is your roommate Yoongi, the man who just took a seat to your left, is your other roommate Namjoon! First off, he’s tall as all hell, and an offensively perfect shade of brown, he can’t even go into the burbs without being asked what self-tanner he uses. In which he smugly replies “Genetics” letting them sit there and try and google said company that makes that brand of self-tan. Streams of meticulously placed colored neo-traditional tattoos paint his skin, accompanied by deep dimples, and bleach blonde hair styled into an undercut, sides buzzed into the perfect fade.
“So you gonna get up and give me a real hug or what???”  Placing a kiss in your hair as he pulled back, giving you room to hop out of your seat and right into his arms.
The Full thing is coming soon, this is from summer 2019, I just have to edit, and reread the full thing again! I also wrote the first 3 parts all at once..sooo if your exicted show this some love anddddddddd come let me know!
Love you as always,
Rocki
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webcamfox440 · 3 years
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Fruit Of Grisaia Steam Restoration Patch
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Grisaia No Kajitsu Game
The Fruit Of Grisaia Steam Restoration Patch
The Fruit Of Grisaia Uncensored
The Fruit Of Grisaia Steam Restoration Patch
Fruit Of Grisaia Restoration Patch
The Fruit of Grisaia Steam Restoration Patch Adds back adult content from the 18+ release (r37934) to the Steam version (r34972). Is there anyway to patch the steam game so that the unrated version will play instead? I've played through Grisaia no Kajitsu steam version, and honestly I'd say it's pretty good even when people say the H-scenes are important. Though i do want to buy the game on a steam sale and also be able to get the 18+ content.
FAQ: A Grand Entrance for Visual Novel Grisaia: Phantom Trigger
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For the most up-to-date information about the status of our project, check our project updates on Kickstarter!
The Fruit of Grisaia 18+ Steam Patch I already know, that such a patch does not exist, wich means, this isn't my question in particular. But I informed myself about this topic and found the 'Imouto Works Patch' wich was taken down.
R18 patch:: The Fruit of Grisaia General Discussions. Content posted in this community. May not be appropriate for all ages, or may not be appropriate for viewing at work. Don't warn me again for The Fruit of Grisaia.
Does Grisaia: Phantom Trigger have H-scenes? Will there be an 18+ patch?
Grisaia: Phantom Trigger was created and designed as an all-ages game, and therefore features no sexually explicit content. Accordingly, no restoration patch will be necessary, as the digital and physical versions will contain the exact same content. That being said, the manga adaptation features more adult-oriented content, as do many of the supplemental items we are offering (i.e. the artbook and tapestries).However, please do note that the series does feature scenes of intense violence and language.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
Will Phantom Trigger have dual language support?
Yes! Just like the Corona Blossom series, Phantom Trigger will support display of both English and Japanese game text, as well as the display of both languages simultaneously.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
How many volumes will Phantom Trigger have?
Phantom Trigger is an ongoing series, with each volume comprising of a largely self-contained story. Currently the first four volumes of the game are in development, but the total final number of entries in the series is yet to be decided.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
Will one of the stretch goals be a PS Vita port of Phantom Trigger?
We’re very aware of the size and passion of the Vita fanbase here at Frontwing, and would love for Phantom Trigger to come to the Vita. However, as Phantom Trigger is an ongoing series, we feel that the possibility of a Vita port would best be considered once the series can be delivered as a single complete package (and indeed, it wouldn’t be feasible for us to release episodically on Vita for a number of reasons). We’ll absolutely revisit this topic when the series comes nearer to completion, so be on the lookout for that!
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
Do I need to play the original Grisaia trilogy before I play Phantom Trigger?
While Phantom Trigger does make reference to characters, events, and concepts from the original Grisaia trilogy, and knowledge of these will certainly enhance the Phantom Trigger experience, the series is designed to be enjoyed by longtime Grisaia fans and newcomers alike. The Fruit of Grisaia and The Labyrinth of Grisaia are available on both Steam and Denpasoft from Sekai Project, and the Steam version of The Eden of Grisaia is scheduled for a March 2017 release.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
Who is the main character of Phantom Trigger?
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Aoi Haruto is the main protagonist of the Phantom Trigger series. However, some portions of the story may also be told from the perspective of other characters.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
Will physical English copies of Phantom Trigger and other goods be available outside of Kickstarter?
We currently do not have any plans to offer Phantom Trigger goods outside of this campaign, and the localized items funded by the campaign will be exclusive to it.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
Will there be crowdfunding campaigns for future volumes of Phantom Trigger?
Grisaia No Kajitsu Game
We are still undecided on this topic, but we have found that platforms like Kickstarter and Indiegogo are the best and most convenient way for us to make physical copies of our games (as well as other goods) available for purchase from fans outside of Japan. We’ll have more to announce in the future!
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
How will shipping be handled for the campaign? Why does it cost the amount it does?
The default shipping method for the campaign is international SAL shipping from Japan. This is the most affordable method that will still get your rewards to you in a reasonable amount of time. Albino 3 free download mac. Ffdshow. If you wish to upgrade to EMS, please contact us directly and we can help you out with that.The shipping costs are based on the actual SAL shipping charge plus the cost of packaging and labor for shipping. The shipping charges are not inflated in any way.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:06
How do I purchase add-ons?
Add-ons will be purchasable in BackerKit after the campaign! You can increase your pledge by the cost of the add-on and you will be able to use that money in BackerKit for add-on purchases, or you can pay for the add-on directly on BackerKit after the campaign.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:15
Can I pay with PayPal?
Unfortunately, Kickstarter does not support PayPal as a payment method. However, if you make a pledge at any tier, you can upgrade to a higher tier on BackerKit after the campaign, and use PayPal on BackerKit to cover the difference. Please do keep in mind that if limited rewards sell out during or after the campaign, you will not be able to upgrade to those tiers in BackerKit.
Search Torrents Browse Torrents Recent Torrents Top 100 All Music Audio books Sound clips FLAC Other Movies Movies DVDR Music videos Movie clips TV shows Handheld HD - Movies HD - TV shows 3D Other Windows Mac UNIX Handheld IOS (iPad/iPhone) Android Other OS PC Mac PSx XBOX360 Wii Handheld IOS (iPad/iPhone) Android Other Movies Movies. Fraiser complete series download torrent. Search Torrents Browse Torrents Recent Torrents TV shows Music Top 100 Audio Video. Frasier Complete Series. Uploaded, Size 69.35 GiB, ULed by Anonymous: 3: 5: Video Frasier Season 1 DVD Rip. Uploaded, Size 4.11 GiB, ULed by Ickle-Stu: 2: 0. Frasier is a psychologist in Seattle who has a call-in talk show for helping listeners with problems. His brother, also a psychologist, but with a more traditional practice, also lives in the city. Their father, a retired policeman, lives with Frasier in his somewhat upper-middle class ('The Elliot Bay Towers, on the Counterbalance') high rise.
Last updated: March 06, 2017 18:47
What about physical copies of the original Grisaia trilogy/spinoffs in English?
UPDATE: A stretch goal for this has been added! Check here for details: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/frontwing/a-grand-entrance-for-new-vn-series-grisaia-phantom/posts/1846833
Last updated: March 31, 2017 07:58
The Fruit Of Grisaia Steam Restoration Patch
I didn’t back the campaign, can I get the discounted Grisaia Complete Box? If you are a backer of the original Grisaia Kickstarter campaign from Sekai Project, or if you purchased the Japanese version of the Complete Box from J-List, we can add you as a backer so you can have access to the discounted price. Please email proof of contribution or purchase to [email protected]. Can I switch my pledge level? If you backed the campaign on Kickstarter, yes! However, you cannot switch into limited-quantity pledge levels. How much is shipping for add-ons? BackerKit has a new system which allows us to set shipping costs based on the actual amount and weight of add-ons ordered! This means that your shipping charge will depend on what add-ons you have in your cart and how many. Please note that the Grisaia: Phantom Trigger Manga and the Grisaia Complete Box ship separately from other items and therefore have their own separate shipping charge which does not stack with other items.
Every route in The Fruit of Grisaia has a different length and structure and follows a completely different path. Even events that are seemingly independent of any route happen differently, such as the summer festival only happening in Amane and Makina’s routes, and everyone going on their own vacations in Michiru’s story. While the common route leans very heavily on comedy and rarely shifts to a more serious tone, the individual stories shift quickly into the darker tone, although even this varies between the characters. The biggest thing that all of the routes have in common is that they all have at least one flashback, and although the flashbacks are always important, the length and nature of the flashback also varies wildly from one route to the next. Amane’s flashback is the longest by far, making up the majority of her route, while the others’ are mostly there to fill out their backstories, with most of the route then focusing on how Yuuji plans to redeem them. Each route contains a single choice between a good end and a bad end, often close to the end; however, Michiru’s choice happens unusually early in the route, with an early bad end or a much lengthier good ending.
The Fruit Of Grisaia Uncensored
Some scenes, mostly flashbacks, use a full-screen text box.
The translation job is outstanding in its own right. Conversations flow smoothly, without any lines coming out as awkward, unnatural or translated too literally from Japanese to English. I noticed a single typo in the entire script, in the form of a single incomplete sentence. There’s also a few small, scattered sections with voices and no text, which is a problem considering the voices are all Japanese. Generally, these are single lines that I can understand with my basic understanding of Japanese, but there’s one particularly nasty sequence near the end of Michiru’s route which has what amounts to entire monologues without text, with only Japanese voices and an empty text box. It seems to me like a somewhat glaring oversight in an otherwise stellar showing.
The sex scenes are some of the better ones I’ve seen. They don’t seem particularly forced, and they are actually somewhat important to the game, primarily for Amane’s route. Even if the dialogue surrounding them is somewhat cheesy (and it is), their presence doesn’t detract from the overall experience. More specifically, Amane’s route would be definitely lacking something important in the all-ages base Steam version, especially in one particular scene which would lose a lot of its impact if the sex was off-screen.
The music is generally good, and the tracks are used to fit the situations well, but none of them particularly stood out to me. The exception is the opening theme, “Shuumatsu no Fractal”, or “The Final Fractal”, by Faylan (also known for singing the openings for the console versions of BlazBlue: Continuum Shift Extend, Chronophantasma and Chronophantasma Extend, as well as the BlazBlue: Alter Memory anime series, among other things). Every character gets their own ending theme, and much like the rest of the soundtrack, while they’re all good, none of them stood out to me in particular. As for the voice acting, it’s the same problem as with other visual novels; since I don’t speak the language, I can’t tell if it’s particularly good or bad.
The sprites can move freely around the screen, to great comedic effect.
The Fruit Of Grisaia Steam Restoration Patch
The visual presentation is unusually good for a visual novel, as well. The sprites freely move around the screen, expressing the action remarkably well for static images. This is used to great comedic effect and is particularly funny to watch while the auto-skip is active. In addition to standard CGs, there are also super-deformed ones (SD, or “chibi”, in case you don’t know the term), also with slight animation, used for humour. Even in regular scenes, when the ocean can be seen in the background, there’s a very slight animation in the light hitting the water – something very easy to miss, but a show of attention to detail that I appreciate.
If you want to read The Fruit of Grisaia, prepare for a major commitment; when I finished, my playtime was just under 70 hours, and that was me reading quickly. Download epanet 2.0. If you want to listen to the full voices, or read through the entire common route more than once, your playtime can easily go much higher than that. However, there’s no need to, since the three choices before the routes branch off have no bearing on the story, and the heroines’ route present themselves one at a time; if you refuse the first route, the second choice will branch off into another route, and so on. Since everything is based off of single choices, it makes it very easy to not miss anything once you’ve seen everything in the common route. The text skip is also one of the fastest I’ve ever seen.
The Fruit of Grisaia will run you $39.99 USD for either the 18+ version direct from the Denpasoft website or the all-ages version on Steam. Somewhat on the pricey side (although still less than CLANNAD), the relatively high price is worth it if you have the time to invest. At times the story is lighthearted and funny; other times, it’s sad and depressing; and sometimes, reading it can be downright stressful. This isn’t a visual novel where a walkthrough is needed – be sure to save on every choice, and you’ll be able to see everything the game has to offer no problem. This is a nice change from the overbearing complexity of others like Little Busters and CLANNAD (and don’t even get me started on Fate/Stay Night), though it doesn’t change the fact that it’ll likely run close to 70 hours, if not more, to finish all of the routes. If you don’t like visual novels or romance stories, you can probably figure out that The Fruit of Grisaia isn’t the game for you; as is the norm with visual novels, the format itself, as well as the sheer length, makes it impossible to recommend to everyone. However, if you do like visual novels and romance, I see no reason not to check out The Fruit of Grisaia if you haven’t already.
Step through the gate into a new, meaningful life.
Fruit Of Grisaia Restoration Patch
Review copy provided by publisher; fan-made restoration patch used
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boyswanna-be-her · 7 years
Text
it's weird because i used to have this life where i didn't mind telling everyone everything about what was happening with me. but as life got more complicated and i got older, there started to be pieces of me that weren't for public consumption--either because they were too precious or too awful. i think as i decided to put those parts of my life away for myself, i forgot that there's this vast middle ground that i used to talk about here but no longer touch on.
so here's my life update, i guess, with big canyons of details redacted so that i can give you some sort of narrative that might make sense.
i got fired from my job editing newspapers in march of 2016. i published my first gay romance novel a month later. and then another one the next month. and another one the month after that.
in the fall, i met some people who also write gay romance, and i started to actually make friends within my own community. i worked on a bunch of projects--not just my romance novels--and developed a lof of new skills.
in the winter, i actually got to go meet a bunch of those writer people. i took a trip to north carolina/virginia, connected with new friends and someone who i largely consider a new best friend in a circle of best and only friends. i got some more tattoos. i drove places that i'd never been to before and saw things i hadn't seen.
i've reconnected with my parents in unexpected ways. we haven't gotten along since i was 15, and now i find them respecting my boundaries, respecting who i am, respecting what i do with my life. it's incredible not to have to hide things from them. i love having parents again.
jonathan got incredibly sick last year (i’m not going into it in more depth than that here so save yourself the time of asking), and that continues to plague us somewhat. it's just a fact of life. he finally got a concrete diagnosis this month that essentially acknowledges that this is something that will never go away. it sucks and things were very, very rocky before that. but the bad times have only cemented my understanding that there's no one on earth who understands and loves me like jonathan does. so i'm here for it, and i'm here to be a caretaker when i need to be.
the caretaker role has been very difficult for me to adjust to. i haven’t blogged about it or actually talked about it to... anyone. it’s really scary at 32 to acknowledge like... yes, i’m going to be in charge of someone’s care for the rest of my life. i've started going to therapy specifically to address this, and to address my trauma surrounding him getting SO sick last year. it's not helping yet and it's very, very tough.
we traveled in march to go to california to see my dear darlings kyle and rhonda get married. i can say without a doubt that this ended up being THE best trip of my entire life. we went to reno, tahoe, sacramento, yosemite, and monterey and i fell in love with that part of the country even more than i ever had before. my wanderlust is absolutely turgid. i decided to write a book set in the stanislaus forest.
the book business have been... strange this year. there's a project i won't talk about here. but i published a book in february that was my most successful so far. it launched me into designing covers, and also showed me how to connect with new audiences. it got a writeup on a usa today romance blog, which was kind of thrilling. most people read it as a disability story and liked it, some of them thought it was furry sizekink porn, and neither of those reads is even vaguely incorrect.
i also had an audiobook professionally produced. i'm too scared to listen to it all the way through. reviewers LOVE the production, but find the writing a little lacking. i'm kind of with them there.
i'm working on a book right now that feels really important. i keep asking jonathan to have faith in me, to have patience, because the book is taking forever. it's about 100,000 words right now and it's still got a lot more to go. i don't know what to say other than i'm in it deep with this one and it... yeah, feels important, like i said. it's something that was going to drive me crazy until i wrote it.
i have a few more of those on the horizon--books that are really talking to me. there are other projects--desining covers for other writers, more audiobooks, books that are marketable but maybe not as close to my heart.
in april, i went to this incredible convention in atlanta and got to meet the remaining new writers who i consider my best friends who i hadn't actually met in person yet. the experience was overwhelming. it's been a long time since i've been in a room with people who unequivocally understand and respect me, and it was a good feeling to have. we'll all see each other in october, along with one of my oldest friends who has joined my newest friendgroup and career path.
when it comes to my writer friends, i’m really up their butts and i don’t know what to do about it. oh well. i’m very invested in these people and it frightens me. it’s been a long time since i had a group of people i felt this close to. i keep waiting to fuck it up, like it happens with everyone whose butt i decide to crawl into.
jonathan and i are going to go to denver in october for a romance conference and then some vacation exploring. neither of us have been to CO, so we're losing it about how excited we are. we both want to travel more, but have agreed that we should probably only plan two big trips each year together. it's just so hard to travel at the same time because of the dog. if anyone wants food and a free place to say in florida in exchange for dogsitting for two weeks in october, hmu.
we're thinking the next two trips will be big bend and the pacific northwest so... yknow, hook it up, pnw crew.
in august/september, i'm hopefully headed to minnesota for the first time to join up with my writer people at what sounds like a disgustingly idyllic location on a lake. i'm so used to not looking forward to things that i'm trying not to look forward to it. i was supposed to visit two friends in DC in april and it fell through because of a health issue with jonathan and i was a little more devastated about it than i understood at first. so i get scared to plan stuff.
jonathan has his own business since last summer. we both filed taxes as business owners last year, so that felt pretty baller. jonathan does some projects like contracting/carpenter stuff, but mostly he's been able to focus on designing furniture. he's doing these incredible chairs right now that just melt my face off. he takes basic mid-century modern designs and then adds and subtracts until it's the same chair with a different feel. he feels self-conscious saying that it's his own design, but that'd be like saying that fanfiction isn't writing. it's definitely fucking writing, and his designs are definitely his.
overall, we've been incredibly lucky that we get to work for ourselves. i'm constantly thankful for that. i can't even explain how much working for myself has changed the fabric of my life. it is simply so much healthier and better, even with the struggles it presents.
my health, other than getting fucking pneumonia last month, has been really good. it's incredible how much changes when you don't hate every minute of your job every day. don't get me wrong--i'm still a depressed, anxious mess. but at least i have the energy now to cope with that sometimes. i don’t have to chain smoke and drink my way through the days because i DREAD waking up every morning. i think soon i’ll actually have recovered enough from all that bullshit that i won’t have a panic attack every time someone raises their voice and will be able to concentrate on reading text for pleasure rather than just skimming or editing.
otto the cat is still missed fondly. i named the main character in my california book after him. hector the dog is unimpressed with his internet success story (160k+ notes on tumblr). he started walking with a limp, so jonathan built him a ramp. poor old buddy. he's doing well with the ramp though! and the limp is getting better.
anyway, i think that's all i can think of for a life update. consider yourself caught up. :)
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031 // Not Yet Dead
Before anything, an image, because it has been a very long time without one:
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Seedbird, in Nigran Cavern's Depths. The ripple effects are new; I created and implemented them just yesterday!
Hello! Sorry for the long delay; I had been called out of town for all of June and July on family business, and, I suppose, for a long road trip of several thousand kilometers (each way!) with one of my beloved girlfriends. During this time, I was unable to post meaningfully, or work meaningfully, or I suppose really deal with life in general, which, for me, is something of an ordeal, meaningfully.
Kind of a few things happened, and this post is rather long, so I will break it here and you can read it at your leisure~
While I was out of town, I found my old laptop had developed some additional bluescreen-style problems, and I sought to retire it before it died entirely, which I did. Through the help of a friend, I was able to procure for myself a new laptop at a price I could afford, which, for various reasons, actually turned out to be more machine than I need-- a bit of fortune for me on a throughly-mixed-results 'vacation'. The adjustment to Windows Ten has been fairly smooth, although it still does a few things I do not entirely appreciate. Nothing truly problematic; mostly "Who thought this was a good idea and what could their rationale have possibly been?" moments and a bit of wonder why the default photo viewer becomes less and less capable with each new iteration. Reinstalling all of my favourite software took almost no time at all, though I discover things I am missing on a weekly basis. Completely resolvable problems, all.
This situation also allowed me to update my version of Python (a thing I ought to be doing more diligently anyway) and to update my version of Pygame from version 1.9.1 (released August, 2009) to 1.9.3 (released January of this year). There was a version 1.9.2 that I tried to download last year, but which created a number of strange problems for me so I rolled it back. I am pleased with this new version, though; there was a little retooling and a few mysteriousities, but they seem to have been mostly corrected. Being up-to-date is nice, and not just for practical reasons, but for self-satisfaction ones, too.
In any case, I am returned now and I hope to get things back on the rails with this project. The first challenge was settling a number of reasonable, less-reasonable, and outright-idiotic file structure issues I had casually created on my previous workstation, mostly to do with file paths being mapped to absolute, rather than relative, locations. In layman's terms, I had told my engine exactly where each file was on the hard drive, rather than where the files were relative to itself. The significance is that in the first case, for the program to work, each file must be in exactly the right folder, starting at "C:", and every file from the previous laptop must be replaced in that exact location. This, I tell you now, is stupid, and not a thing you should do if you ever plan on taking your programs off of the hardware you create them on. I recall the thought that it was a bad move at the time, even those years ago, but went and did it anyway. It took one or two days to reconfigure my map files so that they were able to draw assets from subfolders (directories contained by whatever folder the program itself is running from); I spent some of that time retooling the loader and editor to handle these new relative locations (directories 'visible' from the one the program is running from) as well. It was all dramatically less work than expected, and finally settling this bit of juvenilia* let me put at least that one element of shame to rest: a piss is removed from the ocean! >:D
Moving on, I returned to the matter of Matan Village, permanent address to many several. Originally, I had planned to draw the entire settlement, buildings, flora, citizens, and all. This, I have determined, is actually neither necessary nor even useful to the game: the town would be enormous by comparison to the other maps, the plot does not focus so heavily on the place, and the player would spend a lot of time walking through an area just to get to another, rather than to see the sights (though I would be flattered if they did) or to meaningfully advance the plot (though I could find a lot of ways to do this, it would not be the 'purest' solution). Instead, I have elected to change the structure of the town somewhat, hopefully in a way that is convenient to the player, practical to develop, consistent with the style of the game, and structurally not-jarring. I have a solution that I am confident can accomplish at least two and a half of these things, which I regard as "pretty good" and please look forward to it! <3
Besides all that, there have been several other modernizations of my old code, including some optimizations and restructuring of old methods and mathematics. One of the somewhat discreet and worrisome issues I have found with this new hardware is that it so broadly outperforms my old machine that I can no longer tell easily when my code is badly inefficient, because this new hardware is perfectly capable of powering through my shitty programming, even with Python's relative (perhaps "objectively") weak performance in graphics processing taken as a handicap. Granted, my old machine was substantially below-average in terms of its processing power: it was an old model when I got it in 2013, and by the time it retired, its thermal problems had become so severe that I was only able to run it comfortably in 'Battery Saving' mode. I was able to maintain thirty(ish) frames-per-second most of the time, though occasionally there were functions it struggled with. No longer is this the case: old hill-climby, chuggy-struggling effects are taken as nothing. With an unlimited framerate, the game slows from 145fps to 102 (a steep decline but not one which would effect normal operation). Previously, this area would slow from 66fps to maybe 22 or 25. Be assured that this module is at the top of my "Do It Better" checklist-- it has to do with realtime image processing and possibly I will just learn how to do it in C and write an extension..? That stuff is entirely new ground for me, though, and I have plenty of things in front of me to do first. Just regaining my momentum is hard enough. :s
Anyway, that is about all I have to report for now. I hope to have more images and information to share soon; I shall try to get back on the wagon with my weekly updates as well and I do apologize for missing so many of them.
Thanks for reading all the way to the end! See you next week! :D
* Fun fact! I had originally typed this word as ‘juvenalia’, which looks correct but is not. The true word I was after was ‘juvenilia’, which refers to the (often embarrassing) work one does in their youth, rather than the former, with an ‘a’: a holiday in classical Rome.
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fredd-weasley · 7 years
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New Semester (1/?)
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Part Two
Author’s Note: So the only other writing I’ve posted was my Logan fic (which I might continue I haven’t decided yet) so I wanted to post something else. Here’s an Avengers College AU, mainly because I love these and I’m really missing college at the moment. I know some of the depictions of college are different than others, I’m just gauging them with my experience (I had to look at my transcript at classes, I was on a small campus, I took a few art classes, etc.). I made the reader a history major because that was my major so it was easiest to write for and it kinda plays into the story pretty well. I have an idea of how I want this to go, but please send feedback and maybe some ideas for the future. I can’t promise I’ll update quickly, it just depends on when I’m inspired. Enjoy!
Pairing(s): Eventual Steve x Reader
Summary: You’re starting your junior year of college taking a general ed class not related to your major and it’s stressing you out, only to find a certain someone could be just the help you need to get through it.
Warning(s): None?
Word Count: 1,588
“I just don’t get why I have to take this class, Tash” you mumble, getting everything together for your first day of class after unpacking from moving back into the dorm. You had met Natasha your freshman year, you two both were random roommates but you just clicked the first time you met. You two were best friends and you told each other everything.
“I just don’t get why you didn’t take it last year, you barely did any of your core classes last year” she said, getting her stuff ready as well.
“Oh come on, excuse me for trying to get classes for my major finished up, unlike some people!”
“Shut up, I’m only one class behind!”
“Fine, but I still don’t get why I have to take an art class. I’m a history major, I have to start my thesis anyway!”
Natasha laughed, “Yeah? And what’s your thesis about again?”
“Uh, I mean, maybe I’d know that if I wasn’t taking an art class.”
“Hey, who knows. Maybe it’ll inspire you.”
“Ha! Alright we’ll see.” You say as you climb into the top bunk of the bed. Just because you and Natasha were juniors didn’t mean you had a great dorm room. It barely had enough room for the furniture that was provided for the two of you so you had to keep the beds bunked.
Natasha quietly climbs into her bed and says, “You know, Y/N, this might be actually be our year.”
You laugh, “Yeah stuck in our underclassman dorm.”
“I’m serious, this might just be the year we have the best time of our lives and hopefully meet someone, ya know?” she said as she bumped your mattress with her feet at the last part. You just laughed and said, “Yeah, hopefully it will be.”
You both fell asleep, getting up a little earlier than you should so you could get breakfast together. Once you got to the dining hall and got your food you started talking about your schedule and said hi to some of the people you hadn’t seen since summer began. It felt nice to be back on campus with everyone.
You and Nat were talking about you schedules, trying to plan lunch when you heard someone yell your name. You start to turn around to see who it is but your eyes immediately get covered. You laughed as you ask, “Who is it?!?”
The voice behind you says, “Aw come on, Y/N, you gotta guess! Have some fun!”
You take your time, acting like you’re thinking, “Hmmmm… it is… Sammy?!?!” as you rip the hands off your eyes as you get up to turn around and hug your friend. He laughs, “Well, it’s good to see you, too!”
You scoot your tray over so he has room to put his down, he grabs his tray from the table he set it down on and he sits at the table with you and Nat. You all had met freshman year, he was a history major, like you, so you both took just about every class together so you’d sit together during class and hang out after to study and write papers together. He’d end up in your room a lot so a friendship also grew between him and Nat, as well. The three of you would spend almost every day together and get at least one meal a day together and of course, Taco Bell at 2am when you’d have movie nights.
The three of you talked about your summer, what you did, where you worked, and vacations you took and then it was just about time for you to head to class. “Hey, Y/N, what classes do you have today?” Sam asked.
“Oh, God. Do not get her started, Sam.” Nat complained as she took the last couple bites of her breakfast.
He gave her a confused look but you spoke, “I have two history classes, Medieval Europe and Contemporary America, then a couple hours for lunch, then some stupid drawing class that I have to take for my aesthetic credit like I don’t even get why-”
“Okay, well, we have the first two classes together. So do you guys wanna get lunch?” Sam interrupted, not wanting to hear your rant and understanding what Nat meant.
“I told Wanda we’d get lunch with her, but we can do dinner?” Nat answered.
“Yeah, that sounds good. When you guys free?” Sam replied, trying to finalize the plans.
“Anytime” Nat said.
“Uh yeah my drawing class goes until 5:30 so…” You complained.
“Alright, so 6 it is! Don’t forget, ladies! Y/N, we better go or we’ll be late.” Sam said, as he was standing up and getting his bookbag. You followed suit and said bye to Nat and told her to have a good day and that you’d see her at lunch.
You and Sam made your walk to class, he kept trying to talk to you but you were so worried about your art class so you weren’t really focused. He stopped you when you were kinda close to the History building and said, “Hey, listen, the art class will be fine. Trust me. And if it’s not, I know a guy that’s probably in it so if you really need help, I got you.”
You smiled but then gave him a skeptical look, “Yeah and if it comes to that, what do I have to do for you in return?”
He smiled and said, “All you gotta do is help me get a date with the girl from our Civ class last semester, I found out she’s still single.”
You groaned loudly, he had talked about her every day as you two left class. He spent the semester staring at her but never got the courage to actually ask her out. “Fine. Only because I’m really going to need help in Drawing.”
Sam had a cocky grin as he put an arm around your shoulders as you finished your walk to the building, “There we go! Thank you.”
The rest of you day went by fast, since it was syllabus day. So you got to spend a little extra time at lunch with Natasha and Wanda. Then it was it. Time for the class you had been stressing about all day. Wanda and Natasha told you it would be fine but you were still worried. When you got to class you realized you were sharing the class with the art majors, but as the professor clarified, you wouldn’t be doing the same assignments as them, just meeting at the same time. The professor also mentioned that he didn’t expect the non-majors to turn in skilled drawings but he did expect you to try your best. When he was explaining the boring parts of the syllabus you scanned the room to see who the other students in the class were. You recognized a few people, the juniors and a few seniors, but you had no idea who any of the underclassmen were. Your eyes stopped when they landed on a blonde guy wearing a blue t-shirt. You didn’t know why your eyes landed on him but you couldn’t take them off. He noticed apparently and your eyes darted away. After a couple of minutes passed you started looking at him again, but only to find that he was already looking at you. Your eyes immediately darted away and you shifted in your seat. Luckily, the professor was just about to let everyone go since he was done explaining the syllabus.
“Don’t forget! For Wednesday you all need to have a sketchbook for class. You can get them in the bookstore if you don’t already have one.” You somewhat ignored his words since you already had one so you packed up your bookbag and started to leave after he dismissed everyone. As you were walking down the hall you heard someone come up next to you, “Hey” it was the cute guy you had been staring at. Great. You didn’t know what he was going to say, you immediately got nervous but he continued, “I know the professor said he doesn’t grade non-majors the same as us majors but I know he’s still grades kinda harsh so if you need any help, let me know. I just noticed at the beginning of class you seemed kinda nervous.”
You could see he was starting to get nervous, he rubbed the back of his neck while keeping pace with you. You smiled, “Thank you, I might actually need it. I haven’t taken an art class since junior year of high school so I’m a little rusty.”
He smiled back, “Okay, cool, just let me know! I’m Steve, by the way.”
You smiled and said, “I’m Y/N.”
He held the door open for you and when you both were outside you were still walking in pace with each other, but then he stopped, “Uh, I’m this way, but it was nice meeting you, and please, don’t hesitate to let me know if you need help.”
You smiled, “Yeah it was nice meeting you, too! And trust me, I’ll let you know!”
“Okay, have a good night!”
“You, too!”
As you were walking away you couldn’t get your mind off him. You had known this guy for five minutes why were you acting like this? You spent the rest of the walk to your dorm thinking about your interaction, suddenly thinking the drawing class might not be so bad.
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heshein001 · 7 years
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92 Questions Tag
 Tagged by: @sonofqueen
Answer the questions and tag 20 people.
20 people? Really Urgh.
@dantecain @lonelyblueshark @mazurah @julei-zu @sugarofthesouth @wrenstep @perendhil-loki @humblydefiant @kii-nam @marmaboy @scarlet-geek @clefabledude @princesswytch @spookyscaryexoskeletons @dailyrowlet @kauriart @thesparklingpariah @fyeahmerrill @dark-limit @eightbigpaws
No pressure, don’t feel obligated, I just wanted to put 20 names down as per the ‘rules’, and to be honest, that was hard enough.
THE LAST: 1. Drink: Water. Dull I know. 2. Phone call: That I made? To my Dad. That I received? From a haulage company in Lithuania. 3. Text message: From my Dad. I convinced him to start watching Game of Thrones, and I got an update telling me he was halfway through season one after having had the DVD set for one night, 4. Song you listened to: I Don’t Know What the Weather Will Be, by Laura Mvula. (though if we want to count songs that I ‘heard’ on the TV as well, it would be It’s Raining Men by the Weather Girls. ) 5. Time you cried: A few weeks ago, a couple of days after the passing of my mother.
HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: Nope. 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Not especially, no. 8. Been cheated on: Not that I am aware of. 9. Lost someone special: My mother passed only a few weeks ago. My Nana (Mum’s Mum) died when I was young, maybe about six or seven, then the year after that my Grandad (Dad’s Dad) died, then a couple of years after that, my Mum’s Dad died.  10. Been depressed: Yes, clinically so. 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: I don’t know? I have only been drunk once, and while I woke up on an unfamiliar couch dressed as a pirate with a bucket next to me, there was nothing in the bucket. Don’t know if I had been during the night before though. LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 12. Purple 13. Reds 14. Blues IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: Erm... I guess? Not entirely sure. Acquaintances, yes, not sure if I’d call many of them friends. 16. Fallen out of love: Nope.  17. Laughed until you cried: Not that I can recall. 18. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes, at work., when I saw some emails between managers. Wasn’t particularly pleased, given I was being shafted for something they had missed as well. 19. Met someone who changed you: I wouldn’t say so. 20. Found out who your friends are: I guess? I mean, I have a small social circle anyway, so mostly it was just “yes, I still like you.” 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Nope.
GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: All except one of them, I think, and the random one added me, so she must think she knows me from somewhere. That isn’t to say I’ve seen many of them in years, but I have met them at some point. 24. Do you want to change your name: I quite like my name. It is an odd quirk that my initials are BMW. 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: Not much. I share my birthday with my Dad, so inevitably end up spending time with him. My Mum was also in hospital, so that prevented anything big. I think we went round to my parent’s and had a Chinese with my Dad and my brother. 26. What time did you wake up: I half woke up at 8:00am when the dog came to demand food, but went back to sleep after my other half dealt with that. I got out of bed at around 11:30am. 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Sleeping, I think, though it may have been in a state of half sleep whilst still chatting with my partner. 28. Name something you can’t wait for: Erm... Not really sure. Nothing comes to mind. I’m a patient sort of chap. 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: Depends what you mean by saw her. I saw her, physically, the day before her funeral, in the chapel of rest, about two or three weeks ago. When she was actually herself, however, and not laid up in a hospital bed, I’d say it was back in May. 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: More money. It sounds shallow, but it would make like life easier and more comfortable.  31. What are you listening right now: The hum of the computer and the tap of my fingers on the keyboard. Also the odd little bubbling bloop sound from the fishtank. 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yes. I had a fairly close friend in school called Tom. 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: My damn foot. I’ve done something to bugger up my left foot, it is swollen up and the heel is sore as anything, can barely put weight on it. Painkillers and anti-inflammatory are helping, but gods it is sore. 34. Most visited Website: It is either tumblr or the BBC news. LOST QUESTIONS 35. Mole/s: I have one on the back of my neck I am aware of, probably more. 36. Mark/s: I’ve got some dints in my head from being pulled out with forceps when I was born. I have a couple of marks on the top of both my feet where they have scarred after the skin was rubbed away, which occasionally still open up. 37. Childhood dream: Can’t remember. I had nightmares about werewolves though. 38. Haircolour: Fairly standard and boring brown. 39. Long or short hair: Short, I guess.  40. Do you have a crush on someone: No, my fiancé excluded 41. What do you like about yourself: I like my eye colour. I also like to think I am fairly mature and am responsible, making me good in a crisis. I also like to think I’m quite good with kids, for the most part. 43. Bloodtype: No idea. 44. Nickname: None that I know of. 45. Relationship status: Engaged. 46. Zodiac: In the Western Horoscope, Gemini. In the Chinese Zodiac, Rooster. 47. Pronouns: He and him etc.  48. Favourite TV Show: Game of Thrones is one of the few shows I go out of my way to watch. I also have enjoyed Once Upon a Time, Queer as Folk, Doctor Who, and then a few older things my partner has introduced me to, such as Miss Fisher. 49. Tattoos: None, and no plans for any. 50. Right or left hand: Right handed. 51. Surgery: None. 52. Hair dyed in different colour: I have in the past had it dyed lighter, but not in any recent years. 53. Sport: I don’t play any sports, and the only one I don’t mind watching is tennis. 55. Vacation: None planned currently. Was in Finland not that long ago. I’ve been fortunate enough to enjoy holidays to quite a few places: France, Spain (including associated Balearic and Canary Islands), Greece, Germany, Turkley, Norway, Canada, Dominican Republic, Italy, various parts of the UK and Channel Islands, Belgium, Finland. 56. Pair of trainers: I think I have one pair in the wardrobe?  MORE GENERAL:
57. Eating: Nothing right now. A bit ago, bacon and egg sandwich. 58. Drinking: Water. 59. I’m about to: Attempt to write an RP post. 61. Waiting for: Nothing comes to mind. 62. Want: Not to have to go to work tomorrow. Also for the dog to stop farting. 63. Get married: In the near future. 64. Career: I did train to teach, but didn’t finish the course. Work in an office now, which is OK, but hardly the most fulfilling thing. Can’t find any better alternatives though. WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: Hugs are more universal. 66. Lips or eyes: Eyes 67. Shorter or taller: Doesn’t matter to me, though I am slightly taller than average myself. 68. Older or younger: I tend to get on better with somewhat older people generally. I am a very old soul, however. 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: Arms, if I have to pick. 71. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive please.  72. Hook up or relationship: Never really done hook ups. Relationships are more my thing. 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: More hesitant for sure. HAVE YOU EVER:
74. Kissed a stranger: Not that I can think of. 75. Drank hard liquor: Yes, a few kinds. I’m not a big drinker, though. 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: No, I don’t think I’ve ever lost a pair of glasses. 77. Turned someone down: Once that I can recall. 78. Sex in the first date: It depends on the person, I guess, but as a general rule, I don’t think so. 79. Broken someone’s heart: Not that I am aware of. 80. Had your heart broken: Not really. 81. Been arrested: No. 82. Cried when someone died: Yes. 83. Fallen for a friend: Yes, which then evolved into what it is today. DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: Depends on which way the wind is blowing. 85. Miracles: Not as a general rule. 86. Love at first sight: It is a nice idea, but no. 87. Santa Claus: No. Not as you mean it, anyway. 88. Kiss on the first date: If it goes well, sure. 89. Angels: A nice thought, but no, I wouldn’t say so. OTHER: 90. Current best friends name: Well, my best friend is my fiancé, so does that count? 91. Eyecolour: Blue. 92. Favourite movie: No idea. I’ve seen so many over the years, but haven’t been to the cinema especially to watch one in a while. None immediately come to mind.
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chibicrow · 7 years
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“long time no see, natsumeme.”
Ok, so I definitely didn’t mean to go dark for as long as I did here, but if you follow me on Twitter, you know what’s been going on. But for those who don’t/don’t have a Twitter/just plain didn’t see, here’s what happened:
On Sunday at around 2 AM (literally 24 hours after I JUST flew in to Texas from New York), I found my dad lying on the floor, barely conscious. And I panicked because what the hell was I supposed to do? I couldn’t carry him. His behavior wasn’t making any sense whatsoever to me. He was bleeding pretty badly.
I didn’t know who to call other than 911. So I called the number (nearly breaking down in the process)
After the EMS folks arrived and asked me and my dad all kinds of questions (*insert me breaking down again here*), my dad was taken to the hospital. I would have followed except my dad is paranoid to the point of locking the garage door, so I couldn’t have followed if I wanted to. Not right then.
So then I called my mom, told her what happened (again, crying in the process), and she told me she’d call my oldest brother who still lives in Texas and would get back to me about the next plan of action.
After she hung up, I sat for a bit, anxious for the call, when my sister contacted me. She was just making small talk to help me get my mind off things (which worked somewhat) and we talked for 30 minutes - about my junior year of college which just finished this past Thursday, future career plans, business advice, etc.
After that call ended and my sister urged me to get some sleep, my mom called back, saying my oldest brother wasn’t responding and that he’s probably asleep. So she said she would come over to Texas all the way from California 1) to give me support because I was emotionally fried at this point and 2) to assess the situation for herself at home. My mom told me to try and get some sleep and to keep my phone on in case the hospital called.
Honestly, I thought I slept poorly before, but shit, I REALLY slept poorly then. Because I was just so worried. Especially after when my dad was being uncharacteristically apologetic and saying he didn’t deserve my treating him kindly (which is gonna haunt me for the rest of my life, I swear.) 
When the sun rose, my oldest brother called to confirm what happened happened with me and to confirm a plan of action in regards to picking up my mom from the airport After hanging up, I once again tried to go back to sleep. I got a few hours in when my mom called again to give me an update on the situation - which hospital my dad was at, flight details etc. etc.
While waiting for my brother to pick me up so we could pick up my mom, I figured out how to open the garage door. Which is an accomplishment in itself because usually, no one can figure out how these things work when my dad’s the one setting these things up.
Anyway, so after that, I waited for my brother while texting him that I figured out how to open the garage door, but he still needs to drive because I was too sleep deprived at this point.
Eventually, he showed up, we went to the airport, picked up my mom, and came back to the house. Mom instructed me to look up door and glass repair companies (because my dad had apparently fallen through the door either doing yard work or falling down the stairs - not sure which because the door was broken before I came home), she called a few that I found, and, after saying goodbye to my oldest brother and thanking him, we went over to the hospital.
He slept most of the time I was there and we found out that part of the reason why he was in the condition he was is because he had a high percentage of alcohol in his system. Which baffled my mom and me because wait, didn’t he stop drinking like 21 years ago?
The next day, we went back to the hospital and found more information in regards to his risks, what doctors he needs to see, what meds he needs to take, etc. etc. (which, my dad’s one of those “DOCTORS ARE EVIL” people, so like hell he’s gonna do any of the stuff he actually needs to do). And the entire time we were there, he kept trying to do things by himself where it was likely he would fall trying to “think himself out of his illness”, which greatly frustrated my mom and me (also that day was the first day I actually cussed in front of my parents and AT my dad. I was pissed y’all.).
After spending 6 hours there because the staff didn’t really understand their own system, my dad was discharged and we were able to go home.
And today, my mom was able to get the door fixed and she went back to California. And I was instructed to call my brother and a close family friend should things get too much like on Sunday as well as how to tell if someone is unconscious vs if they’re conscious but just sleeping. 
so yeah. my first couple of days of summer vacation have been shit, but at least my dad’s alive despite being so reckless. 
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roleplay-xx-blog · 7 years
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Info for Time Jump (will continue to update)
Abrams, Theo: 25, London. Typical struggling writer constantly searching for inspiration. Obvious boy next door type. Spent years being teased by the girl of his dreams until he finally got drunk enough to muster up the courage to ask her on a date leading to him being in a relationship and living with Sophie Owens.
Alvarez, Brinley (Slater): 24. Although she was born in South Africa, Brin had all-American dreams and moved to NYC to attend Columbia for her nursing degree. During her time there, she met the love of her life Logan Alvarez. After graduation they quickly married and Brinley found a job at New York Presbyterian in their Neonatal Intensive Care Unit. Until now, their lives had been picture perfect. The past year has been spent struggling to conceive her own child while being surrounded by babies on the daily basis. Now spiraling, Brinley needs to work on pulling out of the depressive hole she's fallen into while trying to salvage her marriage at the same time.
Alvarez, Lucas: 28, traveling the world, and running an extension of his father’s company focused on opening a chain of gyms across the globe. He’s spent the past year focusing on work.
Arroyo, Diego: 26, London. It's been a year since an unfortunate incident led to Diego murdering a man in a drug deal gone wrong in Andorra. Moving to London to shirk attention and inquiries into his crime, Diego finds himself falling into the same crowd anyway. Attracted to the promise of money, he continues down a path of high-end drug dealing.
Bell, Ezra: 27, originally from Auckland, New Zealand. Living in London, dating and living with James Xavier. Has an older brother, Clarke Bell. Ezra is the tortured artist type. Often strung out, high, or drunk. He is, however, a very successful composer/writer and claims his success is because of his “creative” outlet (aka, drug/alcohol use). He writes for bands like The Growlers, Bon Iver, The National, Vampire Weekend, etc. 
Bellamy, Roscoe: 29, living in New York City with his wife Sofia. The French man continues to work hard to achieve all that he can in his family’s advertising company. A promotion awaits him in Paris – a sneaky attempt his father has at bringing him home – but the man refuses to have his wife give up her own career or limit the number of contracts she receives just for the sake of his.  Instead, the man happily remains in the city, encouraging and supporting his wife not only in her career but also in her dreams and aspirations.
Bellamy, Sofia (Keller): 25, model, living in New York, married to Roscoe Bellamy. Roscoe has encouraged her to open up a greenhouse/flower shop on the roof of their building, which has been a sort of dream/hobby of hers for awhile.
Bello, William: 29, living in London. He and Archer are together and in love. Will is getting ready to ask him to move in with him. The death of the King’s father is a huge blow, and Will doesn’t handle it well since it reminds him of the death of both of his parents, years ago. He goes off the rails (with Conor and Elle in tow) and ends up drinking heavily and getting into drugs to cope. This happens while Archer is away on tour.
Bennett, Tyler: 28, engaged and living with Nova Ellstrom. Nox, Tyler’s child, is now 4 years old. Still the vocalist for the band, has a dog named Jimmy and is living in New York.
Bennett, Gwen: 24, living in New York, originally from Chicago. Official merch girl for the band, has a cat named Jojen.
Bixby, Masen: 21, living bi-coastal between Los Angeles and New York City. Masen continues to work as a stripper to pay off her student debts, hopping back and forth between the clubs she works at. Though the locations are different, her lifestyle remains the same, her job enabling her to live a life of luxury while also paying back her loans at a timely pace.
Carmichael, Ava: 22, lives in NY/LA. From San Fran. Riley Carmichael’s little sister. World famous DJ/producer. Has a pup named Oslo. 
Carmichael , Lindsey (Meyer): 24, married to Riley Carmichael, living in New York. Originally from Vermont. Old money family. Had a daughter with Riley (Olivia Rae Carmichael) on May 6th, 2017, so she will be 1.
Carmichael, Riley: 26, living in New York City with his wife Lindsey. The couple welcomed baby Olivia Rae Carmichael in early May of the previous year. The new father travels back and forth for work between his hometown of San Francisco and his home city, New York. He continues to work as the COO of his father’s record label, ARC Entertainment, to which his younger sister sister, Ava, is signed to.
Dallas, Ben: 29, living in Oahu, Hawaii. Several bad decisions later have made it seemingly impossible for the man to pursue his dreams of teaching the history of art as a profession. Whispers of his misconduct with former students have slithered to the surface, and have hindered him from gaining remarkable jobs. However, this has not dampened his aspirations. Ben is currently residing in Honolulu with his girlfriend Ivy. He is currently the curator of an art museum.
Daniels, Sloane: 26, ran to the west coast with Clara and broke into the world of modeling full time. During the year; the two of them drifted apart because Clara refused to give up her line of work, and Sloane pressuring her to do so scared her off. Sloane stayed on the west coast for a bit longer, but is now back to NYC for better modeling jobs/she missed Dimitre and Nikita.
DeSantos, Nikita: 26, Los Angeles, CEO of DeSantos Designs (Temporary name until I come up with something I like more). With her company taking off as suddenly and quickly as it had after years of hard work, Nikita’s life took a turn for the better. While she is still somewhat busy behind the scenes of her clothing line, the success of her business has finally gotten her to where she can enjoy other aspects of her life. Having reconciled with Danton just a little over a year prior to the current time, the two have maintained a healthy and happy relationship. Along with the success of her company allowing her free time, it also allowed her to move back home to Los Angeles where she now lives with Danton closer to the Penitentiary in which her father resides giving her the chance to visit him often and maintain the close father daughter relationship they've always had. His approval of Danton solidified the couples relationship and they were soon after engaged. The months after the engagement have been spent wedding planning and Nikita couldn't be happier.
Diaz, Kale: 24, Barcelona, currently living in Germany. After a stream of failures on the romance front - between ending things with the mother of his child and the mess he made with Siobhan - Kale decided there was no room in his life for it. If he isn't required for training or a game for his club, Borussia Dortmund FC, Kale uses whatever free time he has in New York to visit Catalina (now 2 years old). The male reconciles with his father, appointed Prime Minister of the Government of Spain, who had cut him off previously for choosing play football professionally over using his college degree to follow in the family's political legacy.
Dumas, Siobhan: 21, living in Paris, France. After an ugly breakup with Kale Diaz, Siobhan fled home to Paris to refocus herself. She is attending culinary school to become a proper chef and spends her free time at her grandfather’s bakery, exploring her baking skills through her grandfather’s expertise.  
Ellstrom, Archer: 24, living in London. Archer’s career has only grown, his fan base and audience in general having increased significantly. Though he’s been touring on and off over the past year, he’s managed to create a healthy and loving relationship with William Bello. While Archer is performing in his home country Australia, he finds out about the King’s devastating loss, knowing the death in the family would affect Will as well. Not being able to leave tour so quickly without notice, Archer has to watch as his boyfriend falls into a destructive coping method, unable to help until he returns back home to London.
Ellstrom, Nova: 22, living in New York City with her fiancé Tyler Bennett and his four year old son, Nox. Nova’s life has changed dramatically over the last year and a half, leaving behind her lazy routine and recreational drug habits to instead help supervise her future step-son, especially at times that Tyler is touring. Her past experience as a live-in nanny aides her in caring for Nox, which her upbeat personality assures that she’s always more than happy to do.
Fields, Clara: 23, living in New York City. Clara has lived a very damaged life and has the internal scars to prove it, with even a few physical ones. She has accepted the dangers that come with being a call girl and thought that her girlfriend, Sloane Daniels, had too. And for a while, she had. Sloane tried to separate their relationship and Clara’s work, but after a violent altercation with a client, the pair fled New York and headed to California. Clara had no intentions of giving up her job; she loves the attention she receives from her clients and not to mention the expensive gifts and vacations that some of the higher-ranking clients spoils her with. Once they arrived in LA, a wedge began forming between the pair. Sloane urged Clara to quit and soon it drove Clara to her self-destructive tendencies. Foreseeing their relationship’s end, Clara decided to take matters into her own hands and a cheating scandal arose. She fled and hurried back to New York where she has since been continuing her line of work.
Fox, Octavia: 23, model/photographer, travels a lot, but “home” is London. She is impulsive and spontaneous. She doesn’t stay in one place for too long. She has selfish and rather narcissistic moments that have put a wedge between herself and past relationships. Through the skipped year she’s been working on herself and her rather extreme temper.
Fox, Tamsin: 26, London, management & miscellaneous with Lucas and Logan Alvarez. After a brief relapse with alcoholism and other impulsive addictions Tamsin, having been helped out of the dark spot she was in by Lucas, began keeping herself busy by throwing herself into the job Lucas had offered her. Managing to live a sober and controlled life for the past 4 months has been a struggle. Although the occasional traveling she does with her boss helps, the possibility of a relapse is always looming.
Greyfield, Ivy: 20, living in Honolulu, Hawaii with her boyfriend Ben Dallas. She’s currently attending the university there, her focus in music production. Feeling perpetually guilty for being part of the cause that disabled Ben from getting his dream job,  she constantly overcompensates, trying to do everything she can for him to make sure that he is happy with her and their new life together. Grymzin, Dimitre: 30, living in New York, New York. After a long battle, Dimitre has finally gained full custody of his son, Nikolai. Through the success of his architectural endeavors, Dimitre has begun the first steps in creating his own architectural firm.  
Grymzin, Sergei: 24, living in New York, New York. With his brother’s drastic lifestyle change, Sergei has been giving complete ownership of Rasnak’s and Raza’s. 
Grymzin, Viktor: 30, living in Los Angeles, California. After visiting with his girlfriend, Henley, the pair decided to make it permanent and the man has since opened a successful gym. His love for Henley is unwavering, but his loyalty to his family, and especially his father, leads to shady deals in the back of his gym that he fears could send his beloved away. 
Grymzin, Zhanna: 25, living between Bali and New York City. Zhanna is attempting to build a name for herself in America now. The Russian takes frequent trips to the city but she gets restless easily and returns to Bali without warning. Especially, being under the close watch of her brother Sergei who reports back directly to their father of every move she makes.
Hawkins, Clive: 25, living in Oahu, Hawaii. Clive currently resides in Honolulu with his girlfriend Briar. After the train wreck of his previous marriage, Clive slipped into a deep depression that he self-medicated with alcohol. He was quickly slipping into old habits and was losing his way when he met Briar. What was supposed to be a weekend visit, turned into a permanent move. Briar taught the man how to love in a new way. A year later, and Clive is finally in a good place. He is the owner of a successful restaurant and bar called Pua Aloalo located on the beach, which Briar is creating a unique menu for.
Kane, Nina: 22, Seattle WA + Berlin Germany. Youngest of 3.
Kane, Thalia: 25, From Seattle WA. Living in New York. Owen West’s ex of several years. Past addiction to Xanax and has been to rehab for it. Middle child.
Kipling, Henley: 23, living in Los Angeles with her boyfriend Viktor Grymzin. The former social media famous makeup artist’s account has slowly turned more into a fitness and style account the longer she spent time with Viktor. After a long vacation to the West Coast with him the previous year, they decided to make their permanent address beneath the California sun. Though she’s always trusted Viktor, and loved him with everything that she has, she can’t help but think that with all the suspicious people coming in and out the back office of his new gym, that there’s something he’s not telling her.
King, Conor: 28, London, married to Sasha Zaslo. Mourning the death of his father (who will have died one month before the current date post time jump) and having difficultly dealing with his jealousy of Miles, who will have a daughter, Remei. Also, since their father has passed, Conor now has the burden of the entire family fortune and businesses. Since the death of his father, he’s been on quite the alcohol/cocaine/party binge with his best friend since childhood, William Bello and younger sister, Elle. He hasn’t had any type of affair or any marital issues and is still very much in love with Sasha.
King, Elle: 21, London. Like Conor, Elle is taking the death of their father pretty hard. She’s usually spending her time with Conor and Will, going out and drinking and partying. She’s now living at home with their widowed mother to keep an eye on her since she refuses to believe she’s actually the one that needs looking after herself. Elle is taking some writing classes at a university in London but it’s a half-hearted chore, more to please her mum than anything else. After the Kings’ father’s death, Elle stays close to home emotionally and turns everything else off.
King, Julien: 29, lives in London (but travels often), CEO of a real estate empire that was built with his family’s fortune and owns several luxury hotels around the world (Empire Hotel). Currently separated from wife (for almost three months now), Veronika King. After Veronika left him, Julien spiraled and continues to spiral. The death of his uncle will continue this landslide.
King, Marin (Arroyo): 22. Marin lives in London with her husband, Miles King and daughter Remei. Being a young mother, Marin feels some guilt about working to get her modeling career back on track after her daughter turns 1. The loss of Miles' father brought back waves of her own mourning at the loss of her mother years ago. Marin tries desperately to coax emotions out of Miles, feeling distant due to his closed off way of working through things.
King, Miles: 25, lives in London, married to Marin Arroyo. Goalkeeper for Liverpool F.C, though is still fighting for the number one spot, which tends to mess with his ego. Their daughter, Remei Charlotte King, will be 1 year old after the time jump. Miles will struggle with the death of his father like the rest of the family and have issues coping similar to when he lost his fiancé, Ana Davies (years ago), but because of his career, cannot afford to mourn or go off the deep end. In usual Miles fashion, he will become more emotionally closed off and have his guard up.
King, Sasha (Zaslo): 23, London. Living in London with her husband, Conor King. Ever the optimist, Sasha tries to hold the King family together after the untimely death of it’s main patriarch. While supporting her husband in his mourning, her mother in law with her distress, and Marin with her new baby, Sasha’s need for control over something overwhelms her. An old eating disorder resurfaces, but her bubbly nature hides it expertly from those she loves.
King, Veronika (Otova): 24, living in London. Veronika is currently working on obtaining her art degree at university. She still dreams of owning her own art gallery. After separating from Julien, she's living with her younger sister, Vera. The two have remained very close. Veronika is having just as much difficulty as Julien is with the separation but hides it effectively in her studies.
Knight, Cameron: 25, married to Serena Weber, still touring and in the band. From Bristol. Moved to Portland at 18. Lives in NY currently with two dogs. Owen West is his best friend.
Knight, Fletcher: 26, living in New York City. Over the past year, the Brit has continued his career in photography, snapping shots of everything from his little brother’s wedding, to the band’s shows, to spontaneous trips to Florida with his now long-time friend Eleanor Rosier. Though he loves the home he’s made in New York, sometimes he can’t help but miss the familiarity of his home country, England.
Knight, Serena (Weber): 23, living in New York City with her husband, Cameron Knight. Serena is living her best life, with her perfect guy, and two amazing dogs. She’s fortunate enough to be able and allowed to come along with Cameron while he tours, always helping her friend Gwen in working the merch booth during the shows and festivals.
Knox, Austin: 29, London. Dating Canan Reed, though the relationship is strained due to Austin's behavior. Spent the last ten months in Pentonville Prison for driving while under the influence for the fifth time within the last two years which ended in an accident. Originally sentenced to a year, he was released early due to good behavior. After being sentenced, he was obviously stripped of his rights to shared custody of his son. Under the terms of his release, he’ll have to refrain from drinking, complete community service hours, report to drunk-driving rehabilitation courses, and attend AA meetings. He's naturally devastated over missing such a large amount of time with his son and will work tirelessly to redeem himself for the mistakes he has made.
Knox, Beckett: 26, living in London, married to Orion Ellstrom who is currently pregnant with their first child. Beckett continues to work in the adult entertainment industry, a career he’s no longer sure is suitable for a man who is married and soon to be a father despite the never ending support he receives from his wife. He finds himself struggling to be an attentive enough partner while constantly traveling for work, but his love for Orion and the life growing inside of her are enough to keep him focused on finding the perfect balance.
Knox, Maverick: 26, from London, world traveler. Pharm. D, works for a pharmaceutical company (when he feels like it). Currently living in Venice Beach, CA.
Knox, Orion (Ellstrom): 24, living in London with her husband, Beckett Knox. After a happy first year of marriage, the couple found out that Orion was pregnant with their first child, deciding to only tell this information to their close family, keeping the news from their friends and the general public until she reached the end of her first trimester just in case a complication arose. She partially manages her late father’s luxury real estate company from the London location, delegating most of the responsibilities to a select few of the cooperate heads in the office. Throughout the move, the marriage, the conception of their baby, and the business maintenance of Ellstrom & Walker, Orion has managed to hold on to the free spirit about her, loving life despite any hardships. She continues to put the ones she loves above herself, always thriving to make the people that mean the most to her feel the best.
Koval, Lydia: 24, New York. Lydia has combined her career as a photographer and her love of traveling to create a fairly popular lifestyle and photography blog to share her work and personal experiences. She splits her time between New York, London, and Maui as a means to stay well connected with friends and family, but continues to travel to various other cities for both business and pleasure.
Koval, Ridge: 27, living in New York City with his fiancé Jac Mazur. Having proposed to her almost a year ago, their wedding was set to be within the next couple of months. About six months into their engagement, Jac discovered that she was pregnant, only to lose the child a short couple of weeks later. The loss devastated the pair, causing them to postpone their wedding. The tragedy affected them greatly, but even through it all, the couple remains very much dedicated to each other and in love. Ridge continues to be a successful career model, happy to work alongside his fiancé every day.
Mazur, Jac: 23. Living in New York, Jac is happily engaged to Ridge Koval. Despite suffering a miscarriage around six months ago, their relationship remains strong and loving. After dancing ballet professionally for most of her life, Jac gave up her spot at the conservatory when she found out she was pregnant. After the miscarriage, Jac decided to focus on modeling, allowing her to spend more time with Ridge and to rest her body and mind.
Moreau, Tal: 27. Originally from Montreal and currently works as a freelance artist. Currently jumps between NY and LA to work. His mother is from Dubai so he spends a lot of time with family out there. He finds it amusing when people think his eye color is fake.
Olsson, Aysa: 22. Living in LA, Aysa is busy working on her fashion line. Seeing moderate success, for once the Swede puts  relationships on the back burner, working hard to build her brand further.
Otova, Vera: 22, living in London with her older sister, Veronika King. After her sister’s separation from her husband, Vera immediately welcomed her into her home, more than willing to take care of her best friend in her time of need. She continues to work as an interior designer, her clientele consisting of London’s rich and elite.
Owens, Maxwell: 25, from London, lives in New York. Always gifted in terms of academics and IQ, which led to advancement in grade levels early on. Currently a 2nd year pediatric surgical resident. Dating and living with Eloise Rousseau. Youngest Owens child.
Owens, Sophie Mae: 26. From London. Has always been considered the "black sheep" of the Owens family due to her passion for art rather than money. Went to art school and now owns her own tattoo parlor in London, and one in NY. Currently and officially dating Theo. Sophie and Theo were childhood neighbors. She made fun of him because of his ears and the fact she was older by two years. Middle Owens child.
Owens, Topher: 27. Originally from London and had recently moved to Amsterdam. He took over his father's investment company and hates his career, but only did it out of obligation to his family. Recently split from the love of his life and sold his properties in Maui and NY. He's an avid collector of cars and enjoys marijuana -- another reason he went to Amsterdam.
Reed, Danton: 29, Los Angeles. Danton focuses all his energy on building his business, a private jet charter company, watching it turn international during the year. He establishes the main office of the company in Los Angeles, where he lives with Nikita, whom he reconciled with just before the jump. Being in a healthy relationship for the first time in years, Danton proposes six months in, only after finally visiting his ex-wife for the first time since their divorce 4 years prior, in which the pair had also miscarried what was meant to be their first child. This closure helped him let go of a lot of his anger and self-destructive tendancies, making it a point even to visit the site of his daughter's grave in London once a month - a feat he'd never been able to do before. He's excited for the upcoming wedding and his chance to start his life over.
Rousseau, Eloise: 23, living in New York City with her boyfriend Maxwell Owens. Eloise continues to head the Empire Hotel in Manhattan, exceeding her job’s expectations as always. Though it’s difficult, the couple successfully manages to balance their busy work schedules as well as their loving relationship.
Rousseau, Leo: 27, living in Paris and Bali, newly engaged to Keira Weber. Owns art galleries in New York and Paris. Surfs for pleasure. 
Saunders, Maeve: 26, goes back and forth between London and LA (mostly LA). Originally from Australia. Model. Has a sister (age 21) and a half brother (age 10).
Saunders, Mila: 21. Originally from the Gold Coast, AUS. Now lives in Bali and studying to be a marine biologist. Visits her older sister Maeve quite often in LA. Put her personal life behind her to pursue her own career.
Schule, Chipp: 26, audio engineer at Warner Brothers Studio. Youngest Schule. Living in LA. Originally from New York.
Schule, Tripp: 28. New York native. Has a daughter he never gets to see. Former drug junkie and dealer back when he was 17. Never had a relationship with his parents -- unlike his two younger siblings (Natasha and Chipp). Was diagnosed with intermittent explosive disorder and now has it under control. Successful architect and has his own firm in NYC.
Shaw, Kendrick: Kendrick is a 24 yr old dance choreographer with music running in his blood. With his father being a music producer, and their grandfather a wellknown jazz artist, it was only fated that Kendrick and his brother would get involved in the same business. Kendrick works for some of the biggest artists on mainstream radio today (including his brother). Although he loves what he does, he envies the success of his brother at times and wishes he could express his own musical talent...he just hasn't built up the courage to take that jump.
Szabo, Marek: 23, living in London and working as a professional movie makeup artist. Happily single, Marek works long, tiring hours to attempt to achieve the success and acknowledgement he believes his work deserves. He is the twin brother of Micah Szabo.
Torres, Blair: 21. Living in New York, Blair has just graduated early from Columbia, having studied journalism. Originally from San Francisco, she's fallen in love with NYC and is now interning at Condé Nast, hoping to land an full-time job as a fashion and beauty reporter. She recently purchased her own Netflix account, a real accomplishment.
Tzarich, Kayde: 26, living in London with her seven-year-old son Nathaniel Knox. Kayde exudes amiability in both her professional and personal lives, working the best that she can to be a loving and attentive mother as well as a successful talent agent. After Austin’s most recent indiscretion, Kayde has been granted full custody of Nathan by the court. The decision causes a huge confliction within herself, on one hand knowing that Austin, despite his flaws, is an amazing, caring father, but on the other hand, enjoying the constant time that she now has with her son.
Valdez, Claudia: 23, London. Claudia's on the tail end of finishing her law degree at King's College in London and is getting ready to take her boards. She lives by herself in Chelsea and stays faithfully single. Miles King has remained her best friend through the past year, even through the difficult death of his father. Claudia plans to be a partner at a prestigious law firm and hopes to specialize in immigration or criminal law.
Weber, Cole: 21. Youngest Weber, only boy. From Portland, Oregon. Currently residing in San Diego for school as a prospective dental medicine student. Has a dog named Lucius. He's known to be quite the charmer.
Weber, Keira: 22, living between Paris and Bali with her new fiancé, Leo Rousseau. Keira lives a happy life, using her art degree and past experience as an art critic, she now curates Leo’s main art gallery in Paris. Though she misses her two older sisters and her younger brother, she has found herself missing her home of Portland, Oregon a little less with each passing day she spends with the love of her life.
Weiss, Freya: 22, living in New York. Freya works as an interpreter for various hospitals throughout the city. She is fluent in seven languages and fairly well versed in several others. Mother to a two year old daughter, Cat, Freya has been working on rebuilding a friendship with her ex, as well as establishing a mutually beneficial co-parenting system.
West, Owen: 27, living in New York City when he’s not touring with his band. Between practice, shows, and a beautiful girl that’s caught his eye, Owen’s life and mind have become pretty busy. After having a rather complicated past couple of years on the romantic front, Owen has finally decided to let his chips fall where they may. Not feeling the need to rush into anything, he’s decided to take his time with this potential relationship, waiting to see how well she’ll accept his touring and hectic lifestyle before making any further moves. Love life aside, Owen spends lots of time hanging out with and jamming with his best friends and band mates, Cameron, Adam, and Tyler.
Xavier, Emrys: 28, based in London. After breaking up with Alex Davies, Emrys left London and St. Thomas' Hospital where he was finishing up his cardiothoracic residency and lived in Africa for a year to help children who suffer from congenital heart defects. He only kept in touch with Julien King, who remains his best friend and the love of his life. 
Xavier, James: 22, finally (and permanently) back home in London, living with his boyfriend Ezra Bell. Over the last year, James has focused on creating his own happiness, rather than being dependent on others. Though his mental illnesses, most specifically bipolar disorder, continue to be an everyday battle, James has reconnected with his longtime doctor, who he now sees regularly, and established a medication regime that has kept him stable. In turn, this has played a major role in helping James further develop his clothing line, which has grown exponentially. James now has store locations all over the globe, with his main headquarters now in London, and has become one of the most sought after designers in the world. More importantly, James has been able to repair relationships with his closest friends, that had become strained throughout the previous year due to his instability and prior selfish nature. Currently, James has been busy working on his new line, while comforting his best friends, Elle and Conor King, during their father's death.
Xavier, Maksim: 30, London. After years spent dedicated to the training camp he built for primary and secondary school aged footballers, Maks recently sold the establishment. With this newfound freedom, he has taken the time out to finally finish renovating the house he bought for himself ages ago and looks forward to doing absolutely nothing of importance for the time being.
York, Rhys: 23. After a successful season and a half with Tottenham, Rhys suffers a devastating leg injury. After being told he will never play the same again, he abandons his football career. Reconnecting with his ex, Elle King, he takes up partying in London to distract himself from his career's failure. Still an object of the English press' interest, he tries to avoid the spotlight to no avail.
Zaytsev, Adam: 29, married to Natasha Schule (who is pregnant with their child). Originally from Novosibirsk, Russia. His family now lives in Russia, though. Has an older brother and a younger sister. Bassist for the band. Living in New York.
Zaytsev, Natalia: 20, having left her home for the past two years (New York City,) she is now temporarily living in London to perform with The Royal Ballet. The young Russian continues, as always, to live for herself; chasing excitement, passion and fun whenever, wherever and with whomever the opportunity arises.
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creampuff-earper · 7 years
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Kate McKinnon Fanfiction. Foldingchairs and the city of dreams. Chapter 8
Hey guys, I’ve decided to post my fanfic about Kate McKinnon on here.You can find it on AO3 as well: http://archiveofourown.org/works/8275334/chapters/18957797
Summary: This fanfiction tells the story of a fan, just like any of us, meeting Kate and everything that happens after that.
It takes off at SNL, later on Nino will be there and Kate is the most amazing person in the world. What could one want more?
Rated M 
Chapter 8 
When there’s no text when I land in Amsterdam I feel slightly disappointed. Although I know it’s around 5 am right now I’m still disappointed. I quickly text Alice letting her know I’m about to get my bags and head for the exit.
How on earth was I’m going to explain what happened last weekend… After the date, I only texted Alice some vague details about dinner and the bar but I hadn’t updated her ever since.
This was going to be hard a conversation filled with screams and to many questions and I didn’t look forward to it.
 I collect my bags and brace myself for the encounter with my best friend.
 I smile when I spot her holding a cardboard sign reading “My favorite Homo” and walk over to be engulfed in a warm hug.
 “Hi weirdo, thanks for the sign” I mumble into her shoulder.
“Hmm yeah whatever…” she mumbles back and takes a step back to take a look at me.
 “What haven’t you been telling me bitch?” She spits out and I laugh.
“Hello to you too Alice…”
“No you don’t get to do that. You go on a date with a celebrity and suddenly the text stop, for all I knew you were kidnapped by some creep or worse…”
“I’m back, right?”
“Shut up!”
“I love you” I coo and blow her kiss in the air. “Now let’s go, I need a shower”
“I hate you so much, and I’m soo not done with you, but I agree, you need a shower.”
“There is my best friend!” I smirk and we make our way out of the airport, glad to have made it out of the conversation for at least another 10 minutes.
 In the car back home I can’t prolong it any longer and tell Alice about everything that happened last weekend.
At some point I had to grab the wheel to prevent us from crashing into the car next to us because Alice freaked out so much.
 “ALICE! Do you need me to drive or what?!”
“Oh shut up, you don’t get to judge after what you just told me.”
“Still, I want to come home, alive preferably…”
 After a silence in which Alice visibly is working through all the information I just gave her she looks at me again.
 “Eyes on the road…”
 “Bitch you didn’t…”
“I did”
“You had sex with KATE MCKINNON?”
“hmmmm”
“I hate you so much…”
“Dude you’re as straight as a stripper pole”
“Still !”
 “And what happens now? You’re just going to live with the fact you slept with her and continue living like it’s nothing…?”
“Dude of course it’s something! You know me...! She was the first one since Julie... It’s not like I’m just going to treat that like it’s nothing… I feel bad enough as it is.”
 “Mykah, you know she wanted you to keep living your life. You don’t have to feel bad for her…”
 “I know, but I still felt bad afterwards… Like I had cheated on her or something… I even told her about Julie. I never talk about her to strangers… But she’s got this thing about her… It’s like, it felt like I had known her all my life…”
Alice grabs my hand over the stick shift and squeezes it. “you got it bad, don’t you?”
I just sigh and nod.
 “Why can’t I just be a regular person who has sex with other people and doesn’t’t develop feelings… just casual, plain, one night stand sex.”
“Because you are you!”
“Yeah but dude I’m just another notch in her belt and she has probably already forgotten about me and I’m on the other side of the world pining over her.”
“I know…, I know.”
 We share the remainder of the car ride in a somewhat uncomfortable silence that I have never experienced with Alice. She probably just didn’t know what to say. She has been pushing to go out and meet new people for half a year now, telling me to start dating again, but that was the whole point. Never in my life had I dated, I met Julie when we were 18 and 4 weeks later we were in a relationship. So much for the lesbian stereotype. But my point being, I had never really been with anyone else than Julie and I had no idea how to go about this dating thing.
But when I had been at the restaurant with Kate making small talk and joking around with her it had felt like that’s what it’s supposed to be like.  
And then when we had shared a couple of beers and talking and being around her had become even easier I had allowed myself to enjoy the feeling she released inside of me.
As much as that feeling had scared me, as it still did, it also cracked open a bold part of myself that I hadn’t seen in quite a while. As I stared into her eyes at her kitchen island that night, she had unlocked a raging desire that scared me to death.
Not for a second when I was with her had I felt guilty towards Julie, but back in my hotel room, scrubbing the remainders of the night and morning away, my stomach turned and my heart ached for the beautiful girl who left this earth and me way too early.
She was the one I was supposed to get old with, she was my best friend who knew me like no one else, the person I wanted to have children with and wanted to marry.
But fate, or some sort of screwed up force, faith or being that I didn’t believe in had other plans.
 My buzzing phone snaps me out of my train of thoughts.
 I push the home button and as the screen lights up, again, so do I. I unlock my phone and read the message carefully, afraid if I read it too fast it will disappear. The familiar flutter in my stomach is back within seconds and a big smile spreads across my face.
Alice notices it right away and grins.
“Is she texting you?”
“hmmmm” I hum, reading the text once more.
 13:20 K: Morning stranger, hope you had a safe flight! :) Let me know when you’re home! Hope to hear from you. XoXo
“You’re lighting up like a Christmas tree, you doofus” Alice laughs and I blush.
“Shut up”
“Oh my god, you’ve got it bad, you sucker.”
I just glare at her and contemplate if I should text her right now or wait until I got home.
 “Just text her, or you’re head is going to explode all over my recently cleaned car, and I hear brains are a sucker to get out of the fabric…”
“You watch too much TV, creep” I laugh and shove her lightly in the shoulder
“Your own fault entirely! Now go on, text your lady!”
“Don’t say that…”
“Your booty call then, whichever you prefer…”
I sigh and Alice laughs. I hate her so much sometimes.
 13:26 M: Good afternoon! Not home yet but Alice (my best friend) is driving me back. If I survive I’ll be sure to text you haha. Have a good day! X
 I press send and a nervous jitter settles in the pit of my stomach. This was insane. I feel like a nervous teenager who’s about to get her first kiss.
 13:27 K: You did tell her I’m a very big celebrity with a lot of influencual friends, right? So if she doesn’t get you home safe I’m sure to have a number or two to call…
 13:27 M: Haha talking big are we… never picked you as one of those people who used their famousness to get things done… But I guess that’s not the only thing I was wrong about…
 13:28 K: I guess you don’t know me at all… I use my fame for literally anything. They don’t call me a diva for no reason, I own that title…
 13:29 M: Am I texting with Kate McKinnon or is this Pamela Anderson? Sorry for the mess up, you’re both blonde I guess…
 13:30 K: Asshole…
 13:30 M: No, but seriously, do I have the wrong number?
 13:31 K: Image* I don’t think Pamela Anderson owns an exact copy of the bed you vacated in yesterday… But hey if you’re still not sure be free to stop texting…
 The image shows Kates messed up bed and my cheeks get hot.
 13:32 M: Nice bed you have there but if you were Pamela Anderson why on earth would I stop texting… She has a fortune I might get my hands on with my smooth talk… That’s what I tricked you with anyways…
 13:33 K: Pfft, whatever. But anyways we were talking about getting you home safely… You there yet?
 13:33 M: You texted me 5 minutes ago… The Netherlands is a small country, but not that small…
 13:33 K: How on earth could I know, but I gotta go, work’s calling. Talk to you soon okay?
 13:34 M: Yeh no problem, have a good day at work! I’ll let you know when I’m home ;). Byeee
13:34 K: Good luck with your jetlag! XoXo
 I let my phone drop back into my lap and my smile nearly breaks my face in half. In my texting spree I didn’t notice Alice glancing over at me every other moment and when I look up she’s grinning at me.
 “Dude you got it soo soo bad, it’s embarrassing!”
“Shut up…” I spit out but I know she’s right. I love talking to her, it’s like she awakens some sort of goofiness inside of me that I can’t control. I run my face over my hand and sigh, how on earth was this going to end…
 ------------------ 3 weeks later --------------------
 Kate and I had been texting nonstop. In between figuring out time zones and work schedules we were actually getting to know each other. It became a ritual to text her goodnight and good morning although I knew they didn’t make sense in her time zone.
We talked about nearly anything, my work and hers, things we experienced through the day, our friends and there was an unspoken contest who could sent the most pictures of their pet. I think I have over 150 pictures of Nino now and she’s got a similar amount of Doc, my dog.
I learned a lot about her grueling schedule on SNL and every day my admiration for her hard work grew. Nonetheless her hours, every time we talked for hours and she was always interested in my never-ending stories about work.
Talking to Kate had soon become the highlight of my day, and that didn’t go unnoticed by my friends and co-workers. As much as I tried not to be too obvious about the whole thing they were starting to complain about me being glued to my phone.
Except for Alice. She was also the only one who knew the whole story. She didn’t complain but quite often she rose the question of where this was going, and to be honest I still had no idea. For now, it felt amazing to have someone to talk to and joke around with and sometimes even flirt with. It made me happier than I had been in a long time.
 ------5 weeks later------
 I was having lunch at my job and this was usually when Kate woke up to get ready for work. I impatiently waited for her belated good morning text like everyday but as my lunch time passed and I had eaten all my sandwiches and there still was no text I felt my stomach drop. Maybe she was just sleeping in or no, she probably overslept again and now was flagging down a cab to get to work on time. I slid my phone back into my pocket and got back to my work. Every second I got I quickly checked my phone to see if I got any new messages, but no luck.
After work I decide to text her, maybe something had happened…
 18:32 M: Hey stranger, haven’t heard from you today, everything alright?
 I spend my night with Alice and her boyfriend Josh binge watching anything we could find on Netflix. Although I’m usually really serious about my TV shows but I couldn’t focus on what was happening on the screen. I held my phone tightly in my hand, in case it buzzed, being fed up with why I hadn’t heard anything from Kate today.
After the millionth glance at my phone Alice finally decided to ask what the hell I was doing.
“She didn’t me text today…”
“Oh… Well maybe her phone broke or something, nothing to be worried about, right?”
“Yeah, I guess…”
 “Mykah, stop worrying please and just watch your show, it’s weird watching Orange without your constant scoffing when Ruby Rose comes on the screen. Right Josh?”
 “Hmmm yeah…” He humms as his eyes stay trained on the screen, showing Natasha Lyonne having sex with a random chick.
 I snort and throw my phone on the table. It was probably nothing. She would text tomorrow for sure…
 The next morning I wake up to two messages from Kate. My heart rate speeds up as I fumble to get my phone unlocked as fast as possible.
 03:07 K: Hey you, sorry been busy all day, hope you had a good one.
03:07 K: Oh, and goodnight ;)
 I try to store the disappointment of her short text away as I text her my usual good morning.
 07:14 M: Hey, no problem, just a bit worried! Hopefully you get a good night’s sleep! Hope to talk to you when you wake up! Xxx
 The relief of her text doesn’t last long when at lunch I don’t receive a text, again.
 This continues for a couple of days, with her texting in the middle of the night, telling me she was busy or didn’t have or phone or another excuse of why she didn’t text that day.
After day 6 I wake up to no new messages.
I know she doesn’t owe me anything but it hurts none the less. I had gotten so used to talking to her every day, sharing my day with her.
It’s weird watching a new SNL that weekend without having any idea what Kate’s going to do, or what sketch I have to keep my eye out for some Easter egg or inside joke the cast came up with.
It’s weird not knowing how she spend her days or what Nino had broken in the 5 minutes she went out for groceries.
I found myself more often than not staring at my phone, hoping it would magically lit up and see Kates texts or reading back into the endless string of texts we had shared before.
 But every day without a new text my faith in this magic reappearance faltered.
 -------- 8 weeks later ---------
 More and more as everyday passed it felt like New York never happened. The texts had stopped completely, as did the courage to text her first. Ever since I had came back I had tried to avoid social media, twitter in particular, but couldn't help it last night. I had opened twitter with the excuse to get rid of the annoying notification number at the top of the app, but when I saw my updated timeline my heart stopped.
Of course there was a post lingering on top of the screen with a new picture of a broadly smiling Kate who had her arm linked with some girl I didn't recognize. The tweet read "look at our happy bean! She deserves nothing but love and luck! I hope it works out"
With my finger on the home button and a turning stomach I should have gotten to rid of the picture before I was going to throw up, but I couldn't.
At least now I knew why the texts had stopped...
Fueled by a growing anger, that I knew I wasn't entitled to, I put my finger on the screen and started to scroll down the feed.
I immediately regretted following so many Kate/Holtzmann fan accounts before, as various pictures and quotes passed before my eyes.
I finally ended upon a retweet from someone that read:
@justjared: Kate McKinnon and supposed girlfriend attend premiere of Melissa McCarthy’s new comedy.
It showed the same picture as the tweet before and I dropped the phone on the couch next to me. I had seen enough.  
 -----------12 weeks later------
 Somehow I managed to try and forget about the lady that stole my heart almost 3 months ago in New York. And although at first it had been hard, as the weeks passed it became easier to just go on with my life. Alice advised me to stop watching SNL and apart from cheating on some clips I had avoided Kates sketches pretty well.
As my daily routine, without texting Kate, slowly reappeared again, so did the urge to go out there and meet new people. Alice had set me up for a night of drinking and dancing in a gay bar this weekend and I was actually looking forward to it.
 That Wednesday I have a late lunch and decide to check my phone for the first time today. When it lights up, so do my cheeks. 
After 6 weeks of radio silence, there, right there on my screen was a string of  texts from Kate. 
Most of them too long to read in the notifications so I unlock my screen and take a deep breath. 
I have to scroll up quite a bit to read the beginning of her spree. 
 12:45 K: Hey stranger, good morning! I know it's been a while... Just wanted to check how you're doing! 
 13:02 K: Either you're ignoring me or your work schedule has changed... Which is fine, either way. 
 13:16 K: ... I'm okay btw. 
13:17 K: I know you hate me right now, but please don’t leave me hanging here…
 13:45 K: Danny asked me about you last night... He remembered you after he saw your name on my phone, he told me to say hi, so here you go. 
 13:46 K: okay, this is getting awkward now. Really hope you're just not checking your phone 
 13:47 K: if you're not ignoring me, please text me asap, we need to talk. 
13:47 K: if you are ignoring me text me anyways. 
13:47 K: I am not kidding. 
13:52 K: please
 That last text was half an hour ago. 
Why in the hell would she text me now, out of nowhere... Maybe she and her girlfriend broke up and she needed some attention... Pfft finally I was dealing with the fact that whatever we had was over and now she starts texting again. For fucks sake. I chew on my bottom lip contemplating if I was going to text her back or not.
 I hate myself for not being able to fight the urge to find what she has to say, so I budge and text her back, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. 
14:25 M: Hey, working rn, we can talk later, I'll be home at 8 (2 pm) 
 I couldn't even lock my phone before she already replied. 
 14:26 K: Jezus christ woman, I thought the youth was practically attached to their phones... no just kidding, thanks for replying. 2 will be fine! Talk to you then! 
 I couldn't help the small smile creeping on my face after reading her text. I quickly stuff away my phone and join Julie outside. Already feeling a 100 times better than the past 6 weeks. 
 The end of the day came closer and closer as we quickly dismantled all the activities and stored them back in the big sea containers at the back of the park.
 After the debrief I couldn't wait to get home, I quickly said my goodbyes and jumped in my car. On the way back I got some groceries and texted Alice the (good?) news. 
Of course she insisted on coming over, so I prepared a meal for two and quickly took my dog out for another round as the food boiled on the stove. 
 As the minutes grew closer to 8, the more nervous I became. What on earth did she have to say after more than a month of silence that was so important that she insisted on talking tonight. 
This was a SNL week so if I remembered correctly her schedule today consisted of writing and a table read with the host. That meant that 2 would be not convenient for her at all. This must be important. 
 When I got back to my apartment, Alice already let herself in and was just serving 2 big plates of mac and veggies. 
 My dog launched at her and I couldn't help but smile at the sight. How much I wished for this to happen every day. Coming home to a person I loved, cooking dinner for us both. If only it wasn't my very straight friend Alice that had been that person ever since my last girlfriend passed away. 
 "Hey you! I just saved this pathetic excuse of a meal before it burned down your house..." 
 "Hello to you too..." I growl back at her and throw myself on the couch. The anxiety of talking to Kate in a few left me exhausted. 
 Alice places our plates on the coffee table in front of us and puts out her hand waiting for me to put my phone in it. 
 "Hug first" I mumble into the pillow and I hear Alice sigh. 
Not in an annoyed way but she knows how this situation is making me feel and she can’t really help me with it.
 She bends down on top of me and despite the awkward position she hugs me the best she can. We stay like that for a while and the physical contact calms me down right away. 
 "Come on homo, let's eat." 
She finally says and pecks me on the cheek "your combination of ingredients I don't know the name of is getting cold" 
 "Hmmf shut it asshole" I growl back and hoist myself into a sitting position. 
 I grab my fork but before I can shovel anything into my mouth Alice holds up her hand once again. 
 "I hate you, you know that right?" I say again and toss my phone into her hands. 
 "I know, love you too." She replies before unlocking my phone and reading the texts. 
 I silently eat my food as I wait for her to finish reading. Alice was right, it was a crappy combination of ingredients, but it was food nonetheless. How I hadn't starved by now was beyond me. I was very thankful for Alice and my mom sometimes stocking my freezer with pre-cooked meals that only needed to be microwaved. 
Cooking was something my girlfriend always did. I royally sucked at it and when she passed away I spent my days crying in bed and eating ordered food, if I ate at all. 
It wasn't until Alice temporarily moved in and forced me to maintain a healthy schedule, cooking for me and dragging my ass to the gym to gain some of my strength back so I could go back to work, it felt like I was alive again. It took me a long ass time to feel like I had something to live for again. So, when Kate happened and I felt happier than in forever it only hurt worse when she decided to ditch whatever we had.
 "Hmmm kay" was all she said when she put the phone down. 
"Right?" 
"Do you have any clue what she wants to talk about?" 
I shake my head and shovel another forkful of my superb creation in my mouth. 
 "What do you want her to talk about?" 
"Uhh maybe about how she managed to ignore my existence for the past 6 weeks..." 
"Fair enough" 
I glance over at the clock and see it's 7:50. 
I slouch back into the couch and sigh. "I hate that she has this power over me..." 
 "I know..." 
 Silence falls over us as we watch the minutes pass by. 
 "Hey you can go if you want, there's no fun in watching someone text" 
 "Don't be silly, it's not like I've anything to do at home, Josh isn't home, so I'm just gonna watch some Netflix on your ridiculous big TV. 
 I snort and shake my head. 
"Fine... but you’re not gonna grab my phone from my hand every second okay?" 
 "I can't promise anything" Alice replies with a big grin on her face and reaches for the remote, turning on my "ridiculous big" TV. 
 Before I can smack her in the head my phone buzzes on the table and both our heads snap up and watch the illuminated screen. 
Reluctantly I reach over for the phone and unlock it. 
 K: Hey! You there yet?
M: Yep, just had dinner with Alice. 
K: I presume Alice cooked since your still alive and all? ;) 
M: ha-ha really funny, I have you know I cooked it myself and it was delicious. 
K: hmmmmmmmm
M: okay it was not, and Alice saved if from burning when I was walking Doc. 
 Okay, how did she manage to plaster a smile on my face within a minute... 
 K: Knew it haha. 
M: yeah yeah whatever. 
K: I still have to cook for you one day...
M: is that so?
 I tried to play this as nonchalant as possible, still not sure where we were going with this. 
 K: you made me promise! And as you know by experience I am big on keeping those.... 
 My face got very hot at the reminder of that particular moment and Alice glanced over with a confused look on her face. I just shrugged and diverted my eyes back to the screen. 
 M: how could I forget...
K: me either... I wouldn't mind cashing in that promise again in the future... 
 My cheeks were burning my now, why was she playing games with me. This wasn't fair to me and I knew it. Despite how much I wanted to take a plane over there right now and pin her down to the closest horizontal surface, I knew it wouldn't be fair. 
This had to stop. 
 M: Kate... 
K: Right. Sorry.  Got a bit carried away there. 
M: You wanted to talk? 
K: Yeah... 
M: So...?
K: Uhm so... 
K: Are you maybe up for calling? It would go a lot faster than texting. 
 My stomach turned and my heart rate sped up... we had never called before. 
 I turn my head to the side and see Alice studying me closely. 
 "You okay?" She carefully asks.
"She wants to call..." 
"Oh"
"Yeah" 
"Maybe you should do it... maybe it'll be easier to let her know how you feel about all of this..." 
"Maybe" 
"Yeah" 
 My phone buzzes in my lap again.
K: if not that's fine...
M: no, hold up. I'm gonna move to my bedroom, Alice is getting on my nerves 
 I lie and glance apologetically at my best friend. 
"I'm gonna call her from my bedroom, kay?" 
I say as I walk to the room, not waiting for an answer. 
"No phone sex in there or I'll never cook you any food again!" 
 "Just don't eavesdrop and you won't find out!" I shout at her before closing the door
 "You know I will" I hear her shout back and I snort. She's too predictable. 
I sit back against the headboard and plug my headphones in. 
 R: You can call now if you want.
K: Okay, hold on. 
 I nervously wait for a couple of seconds before seeing her caller ID pop up on my screen. I slide it to answer the call. 
 "Hey" I croak out, my throat tight from the anticipation. 
"Hey you!" Kate enthusiastically beams and I nearly faint there and then. I hadn't heard her voice live since that morning in New York, sure I had heard it on SNL every weekend, but still it was different. 
Not realizing I had been silent for too long Kate asks: "hey, you still there?" 
"Yeah yeah, it's just good to hear your voice." 
"Good to hear yours as well." She says and I almost hear her smile. 
“So what did you want to talk about, after 6 weeks?” I suddenly spit out, not able to handle the way she messes with my emotions by simply talking.
There’s another silence on her side and my heart starts beating fast, maybe that was a bit too forward…
I hear her clear her throat and slightly sigh.
“I’m sorry Mykah, I’m sorry that I stopped texting… But that’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about…”
I swallow down the lump in my throat. Hearing Kate down like this makes me want to tell her it’s alright. That it didn’t hurt, and that she shouldn’t apologize. But it did hurt, like hell, when she just stopped replying and left me wondering if I had said something wrong or if she maybe something had happened or if she finally decided I wasn’t entertaining anymore.
“Okay” is all I croak out and my chest feels like exploding, my anxiousness flying through the roof.
I hear Kate shuffling on the other side and just when I am about to ask if she’s alright she takes a deep breath and starts explaining.
 “I met someone. I met someone and uhmm… we uhmm… we dated… we dated for a while and then it became something more than dating and she got jealous. She got so jealous. And she made me promise, and I know I shouldn’t have but I did, and it felt so bad because you did nothing wrong. And I love talking to you but she made me promise, and you know, you know I’m big on promises and I thought she was everything but she thought my career and the red carpets were everything and I was blind…
 Kates ramble makes my brain overflow with new information that I’m still trying to place together when she finishes.
“She was the girl at the movie premier, wasn’t she?” I say as I feel sick to my stomach. I didn’t have any ground to stand on, we had one night together, but I couldn’t help but feel like throwing up finally realizing I had been right when I saw that picture on Twitter. The thought of someone touching her like I had was driving me mad with an angry jealousy that was burning trough my veins right now.
 “Yeah…”
I bite the inside of my lip trying to calm down before saying anything that I was going to regret.
“Good for you” I manage to say without sounding too bitter.
“It’s over”
“Oh”
“Yeah”
“I’m sorry to hear that”
“Don’t be, it wasn’t healthy”
“Still”
“Mykah…”
 The way my names sounds from her lips makes me blush so hard I’m afraid my cheeks are on fire.
 “She made me promise, but every day I thought of texting you… It wasn’t easy not talking to you.”
 Lost for words at her revelation I fiddle with my fingers as I hear her breathe on the other side of the line.
I am crap at expressing feelings, let alone admit them to someone that made my heart beat out of my chest by simply existing.
 Braving the silence, I finally speak out.
 “So what does this mean?”
 “I don’t know honestly”  
 “Yeh, me either…”
 “We could just go back to the way it was before? Or we don’t…”
 “Yeh we could, but what if….”
 “What if?”
 “What if you meet someone again, and you leave me hanging, again…”
 “I won’t”
 “You can’t promise that…”
 “I will, right here and now, that I won’t let that happen again.”
 I chew on my bottom lip as I contemplate letting her back in. Although I know my heart has already made the decision for me, the thought of falling to her mercy once again only to be left heartbroken once she decides some other decision is more important. Why was she so reluctant to get whatever we had back in the first place? It’s not like we were in some kind of relationship. We just happened to fall in bed together exactly 46 days ago, but who was counting right? I had to know.
 “Why?”
 “Why what?”
 “Why are we having this conversation, why do you want to continue texting to some complete stranger, why are you apologizing for living a life, for making promises you have to keep? Why?
 Kate snorts and I feel like throwing up. Why did I put that question out there… As much as I wanted to know, I really didn’t. Because what if it was just because she needed someone to pass the time with in between shoots, writing sessions and shows. Someone that she didn’t have any obligation too but could shamelessly flirt with. Okay, I really didn’t want to know.
But I hear her take in a deep breath and I brace myself for what’s to come.
 “Because, when I wasn’t talking to you, every time something happened or I found about a new TV show or even when Leslie talked about a new dude again I wanted to tell you about it. I love figuring out time zones and work schedules and waking up to a new good morning text from 2 am. I think that’s why”  
 My cheeks get bright red at her confession, but somehow her words fueled an emotion inside me that didn’t surface very often.
 “Then why the hell stop talking with me… You’re a grownup woman who can make her own decisions…”
 “I’m sorry Mykah…”
 “I know……. but right now I’m not sure if that’s enough.”
 Kate is silent. My heart screams to tell her it’s okay, that I forgive her that I want to talk to her every day again like nothing happened but it’s not fair.
 “Just give me some time okay?” I say and I feel sick to my stomach for giving in so fast.
 “Okay…”
 Not knowing how to end this kind of finished conversation I just get it over with and reluctantly say the words that mean the end of hearing her voice.
 “We’ll talk later this week okay? I’m going to go now. Have a good day at work.”
 “Okay, yeah you have a good night Mykay. Thanks for taking the time to hear me out.”
 “Of course…”
 “Bye”
 “Bye”
 I cut the line and release a breath I didn’t know I was holding.
 FUCKKKK
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dearwaiching-blog · 7 years
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Random Updates
Dear L,
Sooo... it’s been a minute. Looking back at things... damn. I take myself so seriously sometimes. But it’s the only way I know how to process my feelings.
A lot of things have been happening which I want to share with you. Some are related to you, but some aren’t and I just want to share with you anyway since I want you to know. I still care for you to care about these things. Because I still care about you, if I am really honest with myself. And holy cow, I wish you could be honest with me in a more direct way too.
I have shared most of these with you already at one point or another, but perhaps in not such a direct way. Also, writing this down is somewhat cathartic for me since I’m such an emotional person and all. So, here we go.
I’m writing these down in the order in which they come to mind.
1) New job - You know this. Starting next Monday, I’ll be officially starting my new role. No more lion company. I’m so relieved and happy, and hoping to share the happiness with you since I’ve pretty much been complaining to you throughout the last year or so about how things are going in my career.
2) Vacation - I’m going to vacation where you are in November. When I was first thinking of booking this trip, I had this idea in my head that you would be happy and ask for more details. But you haven’t, and it has kind of made me think you are prioritizing other things in your life. So I haven’t pushed too much about this detail, although you are (or at least were) aware of it at one point. I do want to go into this further but I’m afraid to hear your answer. I should push for it. One last time... it is now or never. 
3) Our continued contact - I’m slowly trying to peel this away from my list of “need to have” in my life. Painfully, slowly. Separating myself from any other person or entity has always been pretty hard for me. I tend to have codependent relationships, a phenomenon which recently occurred to me since I had a recent talk with my friend. Once I’m in a relationship, I really do latch on and expect the other person to do the same. Even though we are broken up, I still treat you as an integral person in my life, one with whom I want to share things and experience things. Why is that? 
Anyway, I do think, on a logical level, that eventually this will stop with the way things are going now. As I’m writing this, I’m remembering a lot of our history and it’s making me cry because things are different now. The sadness or emotion comes in waves, overwhelming but quickly over. I haven’t actively looked for your picture in some time now. I feel your waning interest, or maybe it’s projected? I just know I don’t want to feel sad anymore and that is what I feel when I think about you and me. When I booked my vacation, I was still dreaming for a future and how to get there. But I need you on the same page with me, and you are obviously not. It is time to start thinking of myself.
4) Kids - This is a point I didn’t share with you directly, but it’s because I haven’t really wanted to think too deeply about it given the state of our “relationship”. I want a kid, probably two kids. I need to think about my timeline now because as we “peel” apart more and more, I need to think of a contingency plan. I’m not that young anymore and I need to have a hard stop on any more kids popping by age 35 due to health reasons for both myself and my baby. That mathematically puts me at starting to plan for a pregnancy in my early 30s if I would like two kids. If I want to marry and experience married life, that should be anytime between now and age 30 - just two small years - well, actually one full one. Yeah, I get the ticking time bomb thing that people talk about now. At any rate, this all boils down to the contingency I talked about earlier. Who is going to be my baby(/babies’) daddy, if not you?
5) H - Yeah, H. We don’t talk about him. Now that I read back at what I wrote, it’s obvious to me I was just holding out on hope for our future to begin, subconsciously but obviously also consciously since I chose to leave him out of our conversations. If not you, it’s him. Or any other guy. But for it to be any other guy, it cannot be you. It’s not going to be you. H does care for me. Is it a great, romantic love? Maybe not... but it is a companionship level love for me, one where I feel mostly safe in that he wouldn’t plan for anything drastic without me. He knows that I don’t necessarily feel the same about him because we frequently fight about it. One day we are good, and the next day - minute, even - we aren’t. It’s a split in the road for me to stay or not but the decision gets nearer to stay as the days go by.
I know I don’t need to be in a relationship to be stable, healthy, and thriving. Probably my best moments were when I was single, or with you in a long-distance relationship. But I have to think that my best years are yet to come and I am looking them straight in the eye, starting now. That means goodbye, right?
Still searching.
Sincerely,
L
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I’m proud of myself, for the first time ever I actually managed to keep a travel journal while I was away on vacation. A part of me has always wanted to be a travel blogger, or some sort of travel blogger, but I haven’t exactly gone a ton of places to do so, and definitely none that are very exotic. Nor do I travel more than once or twice a year... yeah, I would be a lousy travel blogger, but still, it would be fun. Anyways, point is, I figured I would share my travel experiences on here, just to be a little bit of a travel blogger myself. (I went to Atlantic City by the way, sorry to its residents, but I would not recommend travelling there)
Day 1: 1) The U.S. is as bad as home when it comes to summer road construction 2) All the feels. A portion of our route was the same route we took to NYC which made me really want to go back. Especially once I started seeing the signs for NYC 3) I have now seen 2 Ivy League schools: Columbia and Penn State. They’re both beautiful, but they aren’t Ryerson 4) It is in fact NOT always sunny in Philadelphia. It was actually quite cloudy when we drove through, but it’s a really pretty cit 5) Not going to lie, Atlantic City is kind of sketchy looking. Maybe it’ll just take some getting used to, but right now I’m not loving it 6) I’ve been resigned to sleeping on the pullout couch because of my cold. It’s not the most comfortable but I guess it’ll have to do 7) I look like a ghost. This sickness has made all the colour leave my body. What the heck?
Day 2:  I didn’t actually write about this day, I just wrote down an idea to consider pursuing and I’m not in the business of having that idea taken right out from under me, so moving on.
Day 3: TEEN WOLF TEEN WOLF TEEN WOLF So this is what it feels like to watch an episode of Teen Wolf live. Not going to lie, it was a bit of a lack lustre premiere, but damn, Dylan O’Brien in his FBI attire. A solid 10/10. Also Derek’s back, that’s a win. He’s wanted for mass murder, but still, Derek’s back. I’m going to miss this show. It’s ironic how it’s coming to an end as I’m starting the next chapter of my life. It’s almost like it’s signifying the end of an era. Now that’s sad.
Day 4: My God it is hot here. It’s probably the same kind of hot here that it is at home... when it’s not raining a ton that is. You’d think that there would be a bit of an ocean breeze while walking the boardwalk, but nope, it’s all just sweltering heat. Thank God for the pool and hot tub (ironic, I know). Correction: thank God for the pool and hot tub when they’re both not busy and filled with screaming kids.
Day 5: 1) Ryerson released the schedules! My schedule isn’t bad, the only downside is this really big chunk of time between my Friday classes, and the fact that my last class of the week is from 5:00 - 6:00 p.m. The poor sis had to sit with me for almost an hour while I tried to figure out how to change my lab times around. If all goes according to plan on Tuesday, I should have Mondays off and be done downtown by noonish on Fridays. Overall this is getting me more pumped for school to start. 2) Something happened down at the beach. Don’t know what exactly happened, but something happened. There were a bunch of ambulances, then helicopters and a boat scanning the water. I think they were looking for someone. I’m going to keep an ear out and see if I can figure out what happened. 3) Update on the cold: the cold is almost fully gone. Now just to clear my nose and get rid of this damn cough.
Day 6: 1) If I get melanoma it’ll be on my legs. My bad habit of not putting sunscreen on is being put to an end by the mother and sister. Unfortunately my legs are already a different shade than my torso which did have sunscreen on. Hopefully I just tanned though. Mum and the sis are already pink/burnt. Thank God that doesn’t usually happen to me. 2) Yeah, so I got a bit burnt. Whoops.
Day 7: 1) Wow we are in the sketchiest area of Atlantic CIty. Brigantine, Ventnoor (?) and Ocean City are so much nicer than where we’re staying. Brigantine beach patrol is also HOT to top it off. The sis and I turned some heads too which is always a compliment. 2) Suicide Squad isn’t bad. The character development was probably the best part in my opinion. I think I’ll stick to my Marvel movies though.
Day 8: According to my family, today is my birthday, or at least it is at Rainforest Cafe. I strongly dislike being sung to at restaurants. It’s quite embarrassing. Yes, the (typically) free dessert is nice, but please spare me the singing and clapping. Especially when there’s a cute bus boy working. If tonight’s dinner extravaganza is any indication, I will forever not know what to do while people sing happy birthday to me.
Day 9: Wasaga Boy texted me, which was really out of the blue. A lot of people have been texting me like that lately. It turned a rather uneventful day into something somewhat interesting. Otherwise I would simply be writing about how in a day’s course I’ve read 75% of my new book and how Dad and I watched Rogue One again. Man, there really isn’t a lot to say about Day 9.
Day 10: Okay, so we weren’t really in New Jersey today, but it’s close enough. Philly’s a lovely city, it kind of reminds me of Montreal with the mix of the old and the new. It’s very American though, considering so much of American history happened there, but when you’re driving down the old streets lined with townhouses you start to forget. It’s days like these that remind me how much of a city girl I am, and how that’s where I feel the most at ease. Or at least in the non-sketchy parts of town. I can’t wait to be downtown everyday come September.
Day 11: Today was a lazy day. It was raining and I really didn’t want to do anything. So I didn’t. I sat and finished writing the next episode in my TV series. Then I formatted it. And then I proof read it. I’m probably going to have to proof read it again before I start writing the next episode. Either way, I’m happy because it’s progress. I forgot (or at least temporarily forgot) how much I love writing, and this show practically writes itself. It feels good to have an actual show up my sleeve. Now just to finish writing this season.
Day 12: 1) Course Selection: ☑️ Ideal Schedule: ☑️ I survived the semi-annual Ryerson Hunger Games. It was stressful as all hell, but at least it’s done now. Plus it was good practice for all those mornings I’ll be waking up at 5:00 a.m. to make it to my 8:00 a.m. classes. This definitely makes it feel more real, like it’s actually happening now. 20 days from now frosh week will begin and I’ll officially be part of the Ramily. My excitement levels could not be higher; if only my sleep deprivation didn’t mask it. 2) Finally some cute boys.They’re probably younger than I am, but who cares, I’m just glad to know that they exist in my vacation universe. That, and I have a boy anyways. 3) Passengers is a really good movie. 10/10 would recommend. For such a limited cast it was so human too. I really enjoyed it. 4) Baths are kind of overrated. At least ones without bath bombs. They’re relaxing sure, but when you think about it, unless you showered first, you’re sitting in your own filth. Which is gross.
Day 13: Even though this building doesn’t have a floor 13. 1) So some idiot thought it was a good idea to clear the smoke from their kitchen out by leaving the door to their room open so it would escape into the hallway. At 7:20 a.m. setting off an alarm for the whole building. This annoying buzzing sound plus a recording saying that an emergency has been reported and to listen for further instructions. That went on for like 10 - 15 minutes before the “All Clear” message took over... for another 10 minutes. That was exactly how I wanted to wake up. Because waking up before 8:00 two days in a row is at the top of my list. 2) Well then, cute boys really do exist here, and this time there were actually two that are the right age for me. These two boys who we’re guessing are cousins are 19 which is good for me. It was so cute to watch them playing with some little boys and goofing around with them. They were definitely the kind of eye candy I want while lounging around the pool. And of course it was pretty nice to have them checking the sis and I out. It was a good day at the pool.
Day 14: The last day is always pretty bittersweet. Sweet, because it’s a day to enjoy and make the most of. Bitter, because it means packing up and heading back to the same old same old. Usually by the time the 2 weeks is over the condo and area feel like home (okay, Atlantic City does NOT feel like home, but the condo is home-like). It’s almost as if we could actually live our lives out of the condo if we decluttered and brought all our stuff out to meet us. Am I going to miss New Jersey? Probably not. Will I want to come back to Atlantic City? Definitely not. It was nice while it lasted: the sun, the hot tub, the pool; but I think I’m actually ready to go home. Maybe it’s the anticipation building up for university. Maybe it’s the fact that I miss my people back home. Whatever the reasoning, it’s been good, but it’s time.
Day 15: A.K.A. checkout day A.K.A. my birthday (my 18th to be exact) and what better way to spend it than in my favourite city? Not only did I get to relive bits and pieces of my NYC trip, but I got to play tour guide too and stay in one of those hotels that the main character in a film stays in when they go to the city. It’s been the best birthday yet, even if the sis picks fights, even if tomorrow is going to be a mad dash. 18, has been a great one.
Day 16: Today it’s the mad race against time as the Shawn Mendes concert looms in front of us. The only thing standing in our way is the 8 hour drive and the threat of traffic, construction, and getting stuck at the border. This definitely wasn’t our best plan but it makes for an interesting journey and a fun story. After all, not many people wake up in NYC to finish with a night out in TO. This should be fun.
P.S. If you made it all the way to the end, thank you for sitting through this, you’ve got my gratitude
P.P.S. we made it to the concert, time to spare and all
- 08/15/2017
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