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pinkhairswagtourney · 11 months

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please give a warm welcome to the 128 contestants of the pink hair swag tourney, part three !!

we have 57 new contenders and 71 returning competitors vying for the crown !! starting on 06/21/2023, we'll start voting to determine which of these pink haired characters is the swaggiest of all time !!

ROUND ONE MATCHUPS

PART ONE - 06/21 Iris Lovefeather - Tales of the Rays VS Lightning Farron - Final Fantasy Molli Pop - Candies n’ Curses VS Lily Tabacchi - Lily’s Well Yuyuko Saigyouji - Touhou Project VS Kasen Ibaraki - Touhou Project Madoka Kaname - Madoka Magica VS Aya Maruyama - Bang Dream! Vivian - Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door VS Anne Faulkner - Paradox Live Reona West - Prism Paradise VS Mirai Momoyama - Sparkling Prism Channel Crona - Soul Eater VS Chibiusa - Sailor Moon Satsuki Momoi - Kuroko no Basket VS Alice Asmodeus - Mairimashita! Iruma-kun

PART TWO - 06/22 Meninas McAllon - Bleach VS Neon Nostrade - Hunter x Hunter (1999) Shima Renzou - Blue Exorcist VS Szayelaporro Granz - Bleach Ln'eta - Sucker for Love: First Date VS Miyako Shikamori - Shikamori’s Not Just a Cutie Hot Pants - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure VS Yasuho Hirose - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Sheena Murphy - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles VS Scary Girl - Total Drama Cleo - Dragalia Lost VS Amy Pile - Grand Chase Mashiro Nijigaoka - Hirogaru Sky! Pretty Cure VS Nodoka Hanadera - Healin’ Good Pretty Cure Rina Tennoji - Love Live VS Mei Hatsume - My Hero Academia

PART THREE - 06/23 Mizuki Akiyama - Project Sekai VS Utena Tenjou - Revolutionary Girl UtenaSakura Miku - Vocaloid VS Goku Black - Dragon BallRose Quartz - Steven Universe VS Bonnibel Bubblegum - Adventure TimeLilim - Puyo Puyo VS Harpy - Puyo PuyoUlala - Space Channel 5 VS Jerrica Benton - Jem and the HologramsKohaku Oukawa - Ensemble Stars VS Ramuda Amemura - Hypnosis Mic Sara - Tales of Link VS Meido - Heaven’s Design TeamNatsu Dragneel - Fairy Tail VS Marluxia - Kingdom Hearts

PART FOUR - 06/24 Popuri - Harvest Moon VS Lyla - Harvest Moon Ramsey Murdoch - Epithet Erased VS Yoomtah Zing - Epithet Erased Trixie Roughhouse - Epithet Erased VS Giovanni Potage - Epithet Erased Estellise Sidos Heurassein - Tales of Vesperia VS Sophia - Stardew Valley Expanded Clover Field - Zero Escape VS Zizel - Witch’s Heart Nikki - Love Nikki VS Zero Two - Darling in the Franxx Nana Hiiragi - Munou na Nana VS Amu Hinamori - Shugo Chara! Maggie Pesky - The Buzz on Maggie VS Jinmay - Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!

PART FIVE - 06/25 Reo Maruyama - Paradox Live VS Kazuichi Souda - Danganronpa Seraphine - League of Legends VS Violet - Arcane Jewelry Bonney - One Piece VS Koby - One Piece Perona - One Piece VS Shirahoshi - One Piece Minato Aqua - Hololive VS Himemori Luna - Hololive Mina Ashido - My Hero Academia VS Anya Forger - Spy x Family Kaoru Sakurayashiki - Sk8 the Infinity VS Nadeshiko Kagamihara - Yuru Camp Molly - Bubble Guppies VS Toadette - Mario Series PART SIX - 06/26 Hitori Gotoh - Bocchi the Rock! VS Mitsuri Kanroji - Demon Slayer Hinako Mishuku - Your Turn to Die VS Nao Egokoro - Your Turn to Die Riamu Yumemi - The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls VS Miyu Sakurada - Dig Delight Direct Drive DJ Sucy Manbavaran - Little Witch Academia VS Chuatury Panlunch - Gundam: The Witch from Mercury Ran - Urusei Yatsura VS Akira Kogami - Lucky Star Ilima - Pokemon VS Pastille - Starry Flowers Kumatora - Mother 3 VS Amy Rose - Sonic the Hedgehog Setsuno - Toriko VS Genkai - YuYu Hakusho PART SEVEN - 06/27 Aubrey - OMORI VS Iris Sagan - AI: The Somnium Files Muku Sakisaka - Act! Addict! Actors! VS Tori Himemiya - Ensemble Stars Ribbon - Kirby VS Strawberry Crepe Cookie - Cookie Run Cotton Candy Cookie - Cookie Run VS Rambutan Cookie - Cookie Run Narciso Anasui - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure VS Diavolo - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Yanagi Hanabusa - DREAM!ing VS Shion Mikekado - DREAM!ing Delta - Honkai Impact VS Elysia - Honkai Impact Kory Anders - Titans VS Gamora - Marvel Cinematic Universe PART EIGHT - 06/28 Sakura Haruno - Naruto VS Euphemia Li Brittania - Code Geass Kipo Oak - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts VS Tom Lucitor - Star VS the Forces of Evil “Big” Jack Horner - Puss in Boots VS Princess Poppy - Trolls Machi Komacine - Hunter x Hunter VS Chika Fujiwara - Kaguya-Sama: Love is War Slurpuff - Pokemon VS Tinkaton - Pokemon Hilda Valentine Goneril - Fire Emblem: Three Houses VS Yae Miko - Genshin Impact Ortega - Pokemon VS Nurse Joy - Pokemon Tenebria - Epic Seven VS Tecna - Winx Club

#pink hair swag tourney #after several pain flare ups i finally got it done . sorry about the wait !!!

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feelbokkie · 8 months

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Ephemeral Love | Chapter 19

pairing: Seungmin x fem reader

genre: smau, crack, angst, fluff, non!idol au, university au, right person wrong time, minor character death

pov: 1st/2nd person (depending on how you view it)

warnings: swearing, grief, descriptions and thoughts of self harm (cigarette and lighter burns, falling out of window)

summary: Does love last forever, or is it fleeting? For university juniors Kim Seungmin and Seo Y/n, it's love at first sight but sometimes you meet your soulmate at the wrong time.

word count: 2,737 (unedited)

screenshot count: 6

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"What the hell are you doing?" Changbin asks as he pulls you outside of the funeral home.

The second you walked into the funeral home with Seungmin, you were promptly dragged out by Changbin. Your family was taken aback by your appearance. Your newly cut, partly bleached hair being the main point of attraction. The other being your makeup, which is normally more subdued than it is now. Your outfit being the last. The black dress you found was fine. Some simple one that you bought ages ago for a family dinner that you dressed down with one of Chan's leather jackets that you borrowed and never returned and some beat-up black sneakers. You haven't even bothered to flip up your septum piercing. You looked more like you were going out for a night on the town than your father's funeral.

"You told me to be here early, I'm here early." You say dryly, yanking your arm out of his grip.

"That’s not what I’m talking about and you know it.” He huffs through his teeth, nostrils flared.

"My hair? Got bored." You play with the blonde part of your bangs, twisting a strand around your finger.

"Are you doing this for attention? Is that what you want? You have my attention, so fucking stop." You watch as Changbin pinches the bridge of his nose with his left hand, your eyes freezing on the gold Rolex watch sitting on his wrist causing your breath to hitch in your throat and heart to drop to the pit of your stomach. You recognize it as the one your father bought for Changbin's 20th birthday but never gave to him. The one that was tucked away in his closet.

"Where did you get that watch?" You ask, your voice wavering.

"What?" He questions, opening one eye to look at you.

"The watch. Where did you get it?" You ask again louder, balling your fists.

"Dad's closet when noona and I were trying to find something to bury him in." He sighs, somewhat confused by the sudden change in conversation but slightly grateful. He didn't actually want to fight with you.

"That's not yours. Take it off." You say, a thread of warning in your voice.

"Yes, it is. There was a card with my name on it. My name is engraved on the inside. He got it for me."

"But he didn't give it to you. You don't deserve it so take. It. Off." You say, voice becoming frenzied.

"I don't deserve it? What are you talking about?" His voice gets louder, angrier, and overall more frustrated as the two of you continue to talk.

"Take it off," You hit Changbin's arm with all your strength. Which, to him, feels like getting headbutted by a kitten against.

"Stop it,"

"It's not yours. You don't deserve it." You repeat, tears pricking the back of your eyes as you reach for the watch to take it off of him yourself. No tears actually fall. There's none left to fill your eyes, let alone pour down your face.

Changbin moves his arm just out of your reach. Confused by your sudden obsession with the watch.

"What the hell is going on out here?" Iseul's voice cuts in. She appears behind Changbin, confused by the commotion.

"Gollum over here is throwing a goddamn temper tantrum over my watch," Changbin explains.

"It's not your watch! dad never gave it to you." You huff.

"He didn't get the chance to." He breathes.

"Whose fault is that?" You spit, your voice turned thin and cruel. The three of you becoming impossibly still.

Changbin drops his hand, taking a step closer to close the gap between the two of you, his mouth quirked in annoyance. You're not sure if he's going to hit you or say something equally hurtful. You aren't scared of either action, adrenaline coursing through your veins. You're expecting it. Craving it even. His suddenly Icy stare bored into your eyes, making it hard not to back away. Almost as if they're daring you to say something again. You open your mouth, unafraid to take the challenge.

"Changbin, go inside with mom." Iseul physically wedges herself in between the two of you. Changbin's eyes soften when they flick over to Isuel before he silently stomps away.

Iseul takes a deep breath, relieved to stomp a fight that would have only ended in certain disaster. She takes one more deep breath before turning around to face you. She studies your face, trying to read your expression but unable to read one. She frowns, worrying more than she was earlier in the week. Your eyes are motionless and far away, devoid of any light and emotion. Your skin was noticeably paler and your face slightly thinner. You didn't look like her little sister right now, and it scared her. She takes a deep breath in, her brain freezing at a familiar scent. She leans in close to your jacket to confirm her suspicions.

"Have you been smoking?" She asks in disbelief.

"So what if I have," You cross your arms, "are you going to beat the shit out of me and sit on me again?"

You started smoking when you were 15, curiosity getting the better of you. It wasn't often, only when you could manage to steal one from your father or bum one off of the older kids at school. Right before you turned 16, Iseul caught you smoking one and beat the absolute shit out of you and sat on you until you promise to never do it again. It was your first and only act of rebellion. Until now.

"You're supposed to be the smart and mature one." She rubs her temples.

"Sorry to disappoint. It is what I'm best at." Iseul's face twists in confusion at your words.

"Y/n, I know you're hurting right now. And I'm sorry that Bin and I have been too busy taking care of mom and getting everything in order for the funeral to take care of you--"

"I don't need you or anyone to take care of me. I'm fine." You cut her off.

"Really? You call your little smoking habit and your sudden need to change your appearance being 'fine?'" She scoffs.

"I call it Thursday, actually." You smirk.

"And now you're a comedian." She rolls her eyes.

"Yup, a regular John Mulaney. Now everyone can hop off my dick and leave me alone."

"You know," Iseul steps a little closer to you, "John Mulaney was very much not okay a few years ago. Had a nasty drug habit."

"Drugs would make this conversation so much more palatable. Thanks for the idea, sis."

"That's not funny."

"I'm not trying to be."

"I'm worried about you."

"Don't be,"

"I'm your big sister. I'm going to be. You're not acting like yourself and it's concerning and I'm sorry that none of us have said anything until now."

"Maybe this is who I am now. Who I was always meant to be."

"You wore footie pajamas and crawled into mine or Changbin's bed every time you had a nightmare or couldn't sleep until you were 12. This bitchy, pissed-off version of you isn't the real you. Trust me."

"Trust the woman who went to college for four years and earned a master's degree to become an art curator?"

"You can take all the jabs you want at me, I'm not Changbin. Nothing you say can hurt me right now. So try and push me away all you want, it's not going to happen." She smiles sadly.

"I'm not trying to push you or anyone away. I wish everyone would stop saying that." You sigh, loosening your grip on your arms.

"Okay, Y/n. Let's go inside. People are starting to come and we have to go greet them." Iseul reaches out her hand and tries to place it on your shoulder. You jump back, effectively dodging her. She slowly lowers her hand as she watches you ambly walk alone into the funeral home.

sizz

You wince at the burning sensation left by the end of your cigarette butt pressing into your skin, the pain dull and over quickly. You discard the extinguished butt haphazardly onto the street below and pull another one from the pack. You place the cigarette between your lips and light the end, taking in a huge drag and letting the toxic air sit momentarily before breathing it out. You pull out the cigarette from your mouth and gently press the burning end into your thigh as you take a sip of soju, a cycle you started after Seungmin left. It's not that you wanted to hurt yourself, it's that you wanted to prove to yourself that you felt something. You were still angry and depressed about your father, but mostly, you felt numb. You weren't even sure if you were feeling those emotions or just reacting. You weren't sure you could even feel anything anymore until a couple of days ago when you accidentally burned yourself when you dropped a cigarette on your leg.

You sit on the ledge outside of your bedroom window, dangling your legs halfway above your downstairs neighbor's window watching clouds float in the sky without a care in the world. The ledge in no way should be able to support your full body weight. You watched the ledge in Jisung and Felix's room fall apart after Felix put a cactus on it, but you didn't care. The funeral had ended a few hours ago. Unable to sit through more stories and lies about how your father was "a good man" from well-wishers trying to give comfort, you skipped the reception altogether. You asked Seungmin to take you home, not even telling your family that you were leaving.

You lean your head back into the glass of your window, and watch as a plane--or maybe a bird--flies through your line of sight. You hope it's a plane. You wish it is. Imagining you are aboard that plane, letting it take you anywhere other than here. Somewhere tropical where time doesn't exist and you can lounge around all day without a worry in the world. Somewhere with Seungmin.

"Put that shit out and get in here." Changbin's booming voice breaks through your daydream.

"Fuck off," You mutter, taking another long drag from your cigarette.

You quietly hum to yourself, not caring that your brother is in your room, waiting for you to come back in.

"Hey, when I die, I don't want you guys to sit around telling bullshit stories about how I was a good person or smart or anything like that. I give you full permission to tell the truth and spit on my grave." You proclaim, taking another sip of soju before setting it down next to you. Your hand misses the ledge and you watch as the bottle crashes to the ground below.

"Fucking hell," You hear Changbin mutter. Before you could reply, the cigarette was ripped from your hand and thrown to the side. Changbin quickly snakes his arms around your waist and manages to pull you back into your room, making you two fall to the ground.

"What is your problem? I was fine." You groan, rolling to your side to get up.

"You saw what that three-foot drop did to your drink, what do you think it would have done to your drunk ass?" He huffs from the floor, his back flat on the ground.

"Broken some bones, some brain and internal organ damage. Killed me if I was lucky but a fall from that height is mostly survivable and I possess no such luck." You sigh, slumping into your desk chair.

"Stop saying stuff like that." Changbin sits up, looking around your newly redecorated room. All of the posters and pictures that you had on your walls were in a pile in one corner and your stuffed animals in trash bags in another.

"What? We all die, we're not immortal. Who would want to be anyway?" You spin yourself in your chair, stopping when you're facing Changbin.

"I'm serious, knock it off." He closes his eyes and lets out a stressed breath.

"Why? Is it making you sad?" You lean to the side, resting your arm on the armrest and resting your head on the palm of your hand.

"Y/n," he warns, getting up from the floor.

"Hey Binnie, are you going to cry for me when I die? Or are you going to be relieved?" You ask curiously, spinning in your chair again.

"I said fucking stop!" He grabs your chair, stopping you at your bedroom door where you watch the rest of your roommates quickly run to their rooms.

Changbin slowly turns the chair towards him. He crouches down in front of you, looking you in the eyes. His eyes are barely open, but you can see how they glisten with unshed tears.

"Please, just stop." He whispers. The sight of our brother on the verge of tears should make you feel bad. Feel anything really, but you stare at him blankly.

"I wish I could believe me." You whisper back.

"I'll get you help, yeah? Maybe someone to talk to about all of this? You can take some more time off from school to process some of this before you go back."

"I'm not going back. I dropped out. Well, not yet, there's a surprising amount of paperwork involved."

You watch as Changbin's face twists from sadness, to confusion, and finally to anger. He blinks a few times, letting the tears fall down his face, as he tries to process what he just heard, his grip on the chair tightening.

"No you're not," He breathes.

"That's not your decision to make."

"You're not dropping out of college." He says, cracking his neck in preparation for a fight.

"Again, that's not your decision."

"You shouldn't be making big life decisions right now."

"Why? Are you disappointed in me too?" You smirk.

"Yeah, I am actually. This isn't funny."

"What's the point?"

"In what?"

"All of it. Me going to college. Me becoming a doctor?"

"Because you love it. Because you love medicine. Because you're smart. Because you love helping people. Because...fuck, because I said so," Changbin stands up and walks away from you.

"Whatever you say, dad." You roll your eyes at him.

"What are you even going to do if you drop out? Become a full-time piercer?"

"I could also start doing tattoos. I'm good at art."

"You're not throwing away your future to become a tattoo artist!"

"You do realize you're being a fucking hypocrite right now, right? You didn't even go to college and became a tattoo artist."

"That's different, I've always wanted to be a tattoo artist, you always wanted to be a doctor. You're not dropping out!" He bellows.

"Watch me." You throwback.

"Then get out,"

"This is my room." You roll your eyes.

"Not of the room, the apartment."

"What? Why?"

"I'm trying to help you but you clearly don't want to be helped. I'm not going to sit and watch as you self-destruct and fuck up your entire life because you're grieving and mad at the world. And frankly, I'm sick and tired of being constantly treated like shit because I had to move out when you were in high school. So get out." He clenches his fist, wanting to hit something.

You stare at Changbin, not sure if he is serious or trying to prove a point. He stands in the middle of the room, arms crossed, waiting for you to make the next move. You walk past him grabbing your backpack, significantly lighter now that you've cleaned it out, and shove some clothes and things inside.

"Okay, fine. I spent the first 20 years of my life under dad's thumb. I'm not going to spend the next 20 under yours." Your voice dripping with venom, ready to strike again.

"Fine! Leave! Drop out of fucking college! Get pregnant for all I care, I'm done Y/n! If you want to fuck up your life, that's fine by me! Just don't come crying to me when it all turns to shit!" He yells, his voice no doubt traveling to your neighbors' apartments.

You sling your backpack over your shoulder and storm out of the apartment, making sure to slam the door as you leave.

—

Buy me a coffee?

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recurring-polynya · 10 months

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Bleach Returns Day 7: Always by your side / Betrayal / History

Got the trifecta on this one, baby, but it wasn't that hard, because Kubo loves packaging these three things together (if you allow interpreting 'history' as 'long personal history together', which I do).

Anyway, I'm never not thinking about Ichigo and Renji's first fight, and for a long time, I've been thinking about what happened immediately after Byakuya, Rukia and Renji returned to Soul Society, specifically that Rukia had to be extracted from her gigai by Squad 2 and then thrown in a holding cell and I am sure B didn't stick around for all that, which makes this the first private conversation Rukia and Renji got to have in 40 years.

| ao3 | ff.net | 2225 words, rated Teen for cussin' (tbf they both had a lot to cuss about)

How many Onmitsukidou operatives does it take to get one soul out of a gigai? Renji wonders idly to himself. There is no punchline. All of this is one big joke, but certainly not the funny kind.

“This would probably go a lot faster if we could take her down to one of our medical units,” the Squad 2 spook who appears to be in charge of this shitshow says, sidling up to Renji. “Sir.”

“Sure,” says Renji. “Let’s go.”

“You don’t have clearance to accompany us, sir, but--”

“Then, no.”

“I could go fetch our Vice-Captain, if that would reassure you.”

“Go ahead,” Renji replies, calling the man’s bluff. Dealing with that blowhard Omaeda would really put the icing on the clusterfuck this entire night has been. On the other hand, it’s 2am, and even though the only part of this poor ninja’s face he can see is the eyes, he can tell how badly this guy does not want to have to go wake up his awful boss.

Renji makes a mental note to make sure all his subordinates know that he’d much rather be woken up at 2am than to catch wind later that they tried to start shit with some other squad’s vice-captain.

Fortunately, Rukia, whose timing is impeccable as always, manages to finally part ways with her horrible bootleg gigai, drawing in a huge breath of air with a loud, raspy gasp.

“How much soul fixer did you take?” one of the other spooks asks her pointedly. “That stuff is terrible for you.”

Rukia tells the guy to blow it out his ass, and Renji’s heart skips three beats. For the last few hours, he’s been studying her, watching, listening, trying to figure out if there’s anything of his Rukia left in her at all. The only thing that’s seemed familiar was that charade she put on at the end, acting all high and mighty and offended on the behalf of her noble brother. It’s been 40 years, but there was something in her posture, the resonance of her voice…classic tells of Rukia doing a bit. Maybe she wasn’t doing a bit, though. Maybe that’s just Rukia-as-Kuchiki. Renji’s spent more than a few sleepless nights wondering how in five realms Rukia would manage to turn herself into a noble. Faking it ‘til she made it was usually at the top of the list, but maybe her Kuchiki self would always have a ring of falsehood to it.

Captain Kuchiki often seems like he is doing a bit, too.

“I want a receipt for that gigai,” Renji announces.

The spook does a full-body cringe, and slouches off, muttering unflattering things about the Sixth Division. Renji doesn’t care. Hard-ass, rule-abiding vice-captain of Kuchiki squad is not a bit. It’s who he is now.

When the receipt comes, it’s actually a petty cash voucher with “GIGAI” written in the “Received” column, but it’s got a mostly legible signature and Squad 2 letterhead, and also it’s two in the fucking a.m., so Renji takes it.

“You need to borrow a pair of shackles?” the spook asks dryly. “Can put that on the receipt, too.”

Renji’s blood stops flowing, just for a second. Rukia is watching him. He hadn’t thought about this. She’s come along willingly up until now. He wishes he could trust her to continue in the same vein, but he can’t, both because she’s not trustworthy, and because the Vice-Captain of the Sixth isn’t a guy who lets his guard down on account of old friendships.

“No,” he says, and Rukia’s eyes narrow, ever so slightly. He jerks his chin at her. “Hands behind your back, if you don’t mind. Don’t need any dislocated shoulders.”

Her face becomes passive again as he casts bakudou number one on her. It’s easy enough that he doesn’t embarrass himself, although with the way this night has been going, it would certainly be no surprise.

A few minutes later, they step out into the night air, free of Squad 2 at last. There’s a breeze, which downgrades the humidity from “insufferable” to “unpleasant”, even just briefly. A thunderstorm was just finding its legs when they left the World of the Living. Renji wishes they would get one here, too, but it doesn’t seem to be in the cards.

The streets are empty at this time of night. Rukia looks straight ahead as they walk. There’s a hollowness to her eyes.

Renji’s not an idiot. Well. He is, but he’s not a fucking idiot. Rukia is not a person who shares her heart easily, but it’s because when she does, she carves off an entire piece and dumps it in your hands, bloody and tender. Why the Hell she would do so for some human kid is absolutely beyond Renji. They only live for about five days anyway and everything they do is absolutely nonsensical. Maybe some of it was that weird gigai. Probably messed with her head. She’ll likely be fine in a few hours. Well. Maybe not fine, but at least worried about the things she ought to be worrying about.

Renji thinks about all the things he had planned out to say to her. He had spent hours rolling them around in his head all through his last weeks at Squad Eleven. Even wrote some down on paper in little bulleted lists, like the study guides Momo used to make when they were at the Academy. He can’t say any of them now. He can’t say them because Rukia boned a routine mission so thoroughly that at least three other squads had gotten pulled into it. He can’t say them because, in his idiotic confidence that there had to be some logical explanation for all of it, that he and Captain Kuchiki would be able to swoop in and make things right for her, that he made both an asshole of himself and lost a fight pathetically, to a child. Finally, he can’t say them to her, because he is the Vice-Captain of the Sixth. And she is his prisoner.

Renji has never been much of an apologizer, and Rukia isn’t a person who requires apologies, but the absence of one hangs heavy between them. He can’t apologize for following orders though. Vice-Captain of the Sixth strikes again.

“You really didn’t need to stand there and glower at them for every second of that,” Rukia says, in a way that sounds like she’s talking to herself, but he knows is directed at him. “You’ve gotta feel kinda disgusting.”

Renji bristles. “What I feel is none of your business. Someone’s in my custody, and you think I’m gonna leave them alone with a bunch of slimy Squad 2 spooks for a single second?”

Rukia stares at him for a long moment. “I just meant that you could have gone to the washroom. You do know your face is covered in blood, right?”

Renji’s hand goes reflexively to his forehead. It feels mostly dried, at least. “Oh,” he says stupidly.

“Your chin, too.”

Renji grinds his teeth.

“It’s fine,” Rukia says lightly. “Impressive, I suppose, to someone who didn’t see how it happened. You certainly intimidated the shit out of those Squad Two morons.” She cocks an eyebrow at him slyly. “You gotta handkerchief on you? Let me out of this bind, I’ll wipe off your face for you.”

He tips his head to the side and regards her out of the corner of his eye. “Not a chance.”

“I had to give it a try,” she sniffs. “It’s not as if you wouldn’t catch me in two seconds if I tried to give you the slip.”

“Give it up,” he warns. “It won’t work on me. I know you too well.”

Rukia falls quiet and he regrets saying it. Forty years of working to raise himself to her level, and it feels like all he can do is remind her where they both came from.

“Renji,” she says, after a long pause, “about that.”

“Forget it,” he says.

She ignores him, just as she always has. “It wasn’t fair of me,” she says, “to grab your arm like that.”

He wishes he had to wrack his brain to figure out what she’s talking about, but the memory of tiny fingers wrapping over his knuckles, her knee jabbing the soft space between his shoulder blades, the sudden familiar weight of her hanging off his back.

Even without her powers, Rukia is still a soldier. She knows pressure points. She had access to his throat, his windpipe, his carotid. But instead, she grabbed his sword hand. A request. A plea, maybe. Don’t do it. Let him live.

She weighs nothing. Her gigai had the strength of a human girl. The only thing staying his arm was the unspeakable weight of their history together.

Time freezes. In Renji’s mind, the human kid’s fingers close on the hilt of his stupid, oversized sword.

Renji sparred against Rukia at the Academy, and they used to scrap as kids, sometimes more seriously than others, but Rukia has always had his back when it really mattered.

If Kurosaki had the least idea of what he was actually doing, he probably could have run Renji straight through, and Renji would have just stood there, his mouth hanging open like an idiot. He keeps telling himself that this was not Rukia’s intent. Maybe she thought better of his battle reflexes. He sure wishes he did. She only expected the kid to run. She probably has no idea how much hold she still has on his heart. Or, y’know. Maybe not. To all of it.

“Don’t get me wrong,” Rukia grumbles. “I don’t regret it. I would do it again. I’m just saying that it wasn’t fair of me to ask that much of you.”

“If you think I got my ass kicked as some sort of favor to you, you’re giving yourself a little too much credit,” Renji grunts. “That incompetence was 100% genuine and unfaked, but thanks for the show of confidence.”

“Oh, no, that was obvious.” She sighs and falls quiet.

He wonders what she thinks he would have done, if it had turned out he had any say in the matter. Does she think he would have spared Ichigo? Is this her inscrutable, Rukia version of a thank you? Or does she think he would have killed the kid, that leniency was too big an ask, and she doesn’t particularly hold it against him? Maybe she’s asking him to explain himself. What difference would it make? From her point of view, he has no particular incentive to tell her the truth, only whatever he wants her to hear.

“You…you can’t have worked for my brother for very long,” she finally says in a way that implies she’s not entirely sure of this fact. “You definitely didn’t work for him before I left, did you?”

“I just started,” Renji assures her.

“Well, then, maybe you don’t know him very well, but--”

“I know him well enough.”

Rukia’s mouth hangs open for a second. She licks her lips. “I see.” And then she smiles. Just a small one. Maybe a little bit rueful.

“What?” Renji demands peevishly. “What, exactly, do you see?”

“Just that you know, then. That he hates leaving things half done. That for as cool as he sounded, it probably caused him physical pain to leave Ichigo there without finishing him off.”

“You asked him to,” Renji shrugs. “It was a favor.” Her hand on his sword arm. A dramatic performance of a dutiful, penitent sister. Rukia always knows just the right way to ask for what she wants.

“You probably know that he’s not too generous with favors, either,” Rukia points out. “You could have reminded him that leaving humans with illicitly gained shinigami powers to expire of their wounds isn’t proper procedure.”

Renji doesn’t reply.

“You didn’t though.”

That’s right. He didn’t. It didn’t even occur to him. It should have. But Vice-Captain of the Sixth is still something he has to think about doing, and slipping into the support role on one of Rukia’s grifts has always been as natural as breathing.

Renji can see Squad Six’s gate up ahead. He is so tired. He just wants this night to be over.

“I woulda gone along with just about anything if it would get you to stop digging yourself a grave so deep you were about to break through to Hell, okay?”

She hums in agreement and makes a small nod.

“You’re such a pain in my ass, you know that, Rukia?”

She gives a soft snort. “Yeah,” she says, “I know.”

#bleach returns 2023 #renruki #renji abarai #rukia kuchiki #my writing

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bigjumpervibes · 10 months

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Bleach Celebration 2023 - Day 8 - Hope / Vacation / In Remembrance

Finishing with my favourite little scoundrel in hell 💖

Gin was my first favourite character in Bleach when I started watching / reading in the early 2000’s, just an insane vibe off this guy (he just tied up Kenpachi in the first few panels he was introduced? Like, what? And then the arrancar encyclopaedia sections? MULTIFACETED 👏)

I imagine he’s watching this all go down with a cocktail in hand 🏖️🍹

I also found the best reference for this pose of just a guy having a good time, it made me smile

Reference Below:

Look at this wonderful guy

Link: https://www.istockphoto.com/photo/mature-tourist-toasting-with-a-cocktail-sitting-on-a-beach-chair-and-greeting-with-gm1327653562-411952928

#bleach returns 2023 #gin ichimaru #ichimaru gin #bleach #bleach fanart #my art #bleach spoilers #kinda #bleach tybw spoilers #wooooo finished! thanks for all the nice tags!#I’ll do a summary post tomorrow but this has been a nice distraction for me during a rough time

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mako-neexu · 30 days

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please do give a summary!! and thank you 🥺❤️

i got busy with dream striker asdsjkfh but heres the summary:

basically 80% of the Servants take their leave and return to their home countries- or at least where they're located considering the earth is bleached. And Santa Martha picks Nemo to be 2023 santa this time so he's named Nemo Porter. After taking on the role of santa, Nemo insists on guda and mash to stay and fully relax in the border then after nemo leaves BB helps guda and mash secretly assist santa nemo by making sure his route is safe wherever he goes.

over the week, we get to learn that nemo took on being santa because he wants to give someone a gift. you see how even king hassan himself warned nemo about it then later on merlin stops nemo for a while because of just how risky the operation is and tells them that its practically near-worthless given what they're going to do, then BB with guda and mash not to ask nemo about what hes planning.

nemo's objective all along is to gift guda their chaldean uniform- the very Master from years ago who collapsed right after a battle simulation as soon as they came to Chaldea. its really sweet...

it was a highly risky voyage considering time travel itself is near impossibility and could absolutely destroy Nemo's saint graph into nothing should he even breathe wrong during the Zero Sail or during his time at 2015 chaldea. so "no changing the past" is something that was absolutely integral to the time travel. even telling past-ritsuka about how special the uniform is would cause everything to fall apart. (this is also why the event is named like this btw 7 days of preparation and delivering presents and 8 years of traveling back far into the past)

after going through against the harsh upcurrent (and even seeing guda's nightmares especially Garden of Lostwill), nemo and the crew eventually safely travel back to the past, with nemo wearing meuniere as a disguise. there, he sees cerejeira, some old staff... and finally Romani Ar- "Man in a Lab Coat".... which the Man almost instantly realize its not "Meuniere" beneath but maintains friendliness regardless. they have a chat- a small chat of world fighting for survival to which the Man in a Lab Coat expresses his opnion that there is no right and wrong in a battle for survival. that the victor only gets to have the right to see what happens next.

then the conversation finishes and "Meuniere" asks the Doctor for two pairs of white gloves. to which santa nemo gives to the present guda and mash as his christmas present for both of them, after having delivered past-guda's uniform for them to use later on.

ok cut now for lore stuff

basically the most striking detail albeit small, changes everything.

"Announcer" - Prologue of the Fuyuki singularity

"CHALDEAS" - Christmas 2023 event

this basically means that it wasnt an accident that Fujimaru Ritsuka became Humanity's Last Master that day. it means that CHALDEAS itself literally planned for fujimaru to pass out in the simulation to delay their arrival from the bombing, setting the battle simulator to "Senior" or highly difficult on their first day.

CHALDEAS. CHALDEAS itself chose ritsuka that day. it could probably be because no one was highly as compatible with servants as much as Fujimaru Ritsuka themself. and considering its true purpose is to fulfill marisbury's grand order, it must have chosen them for that reason? theres not much info on chaldeas that i remember but if you consider this, then that changes everything from the start.

#ask #fgo #fate grand order

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celebratebleach · 9 months

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I apologise for how long it took to post this, but a big thank you to everyone who participated in this year's BLEACH Anime Celebration! If you haven't already, check out this year's entries:

Day 1: Before the war / Stars / Teamwork

Before the war by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring Ichigo Kurosaki, Orihime Inoue, Sado 'Chad' Yasutora, Uryu Ichida, and Rukia Kuchiki] Stars by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr] Stars(fanart) and Stars (fanfiction) by @toshiro-taichou [fanart and fanfiction feautring Toushiro Hitsugaya, renruki, Ichika Abarai, and Rangiku Matsumoto] Omaeda by badluckdog [fanfiction featuring Omaeda Marechiyo and Sui Feng]

Day 2: Warm tones / Scar / Underneath the sycramore

Scar by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring Shuhei Hisagi] Warm Tones by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr] Scar (fanart) and Scar (fanfiction) by @toshiro-taichou [fanart and fanfiction featuring Toushiro Hitsugaya, Ichigo Kurosaki, and Hiyori Sarugaki] The Shinigami Women's Association by badluckdog [fanfiction featuring Isane Kotetsu, Rukia Kuchiki, Iemura Yasochika, Rangiku Matsumoto, and Momo Hinamori]

Day 3: An unlikely duo / Poem / The high school warfare

The High School Warfare by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring the Visoreds] The High School Warfare (fanart) and The High School Warfare (fanfiction) by @toshiro-taichou [fanart and fanfcition featuring oc] An Unlikely Duo by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring As Nodt and Askin Nakk le Varr] The High School Warfare by @jushiro-ukitake [fanart featuring Sado 'Chad' Yasutora, Tatsuki Arisawa, Orihime Inoue, Momo Hinamori, Rangiku Matsumoto, and Rukia Kuchiki] Yasochika by badluckdog [fanfiction featuring Iemura Yasochika, Renji Abarai, Rukia Kuchiki, and Ikkaku Madarame]

Day 4: Classic / Protect / Inspired by a song

Protect by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring Orihime Inoue and Neliel tu Odelshwanck] Classic by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr] Inspired by a song (fanart) and Inspired by a song (fanfiction) by @toshiro-taichou [fanart and fanfiction featuring oc]

Day 5: Heart / Hobbies / Let’s discuss this over drinks

Heart by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring Riruka Dokugamine] Hobbies by @recurring-polynya [fanart featuring Renji Abarai, Tetsuzaemon Iba, Isane Kotetsu, Retsu Unohana, Momo Hinamori, Nanao Ise, Rangiku Matsumoto, Toushiro Hitsugaya, Kenpachi Zaraki, and Kaien Shiba] Heart by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr] Hobbies by @toshiro-taichou [fanart featuring Toushiro Hitsugaya and ocs]

Day 6: Saihate / Animals / Battle

Battle by @toshiro-taichou [fanart featuring ocs] Animals by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr] Battle by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring Yachiru Unohana]

Day 7: Always by your side / Betrayal / History

Always by your side by @jushiro-ukitake [fanart featuring Ichihime, Tatsuki Arisawa, and Kazui Kurosaki] Always by Your Side/Betrayal/History by @recurring-polynya [fanfiction feautring renruki] History by @bigjumpervibes [fanart feautring Shinji Hirako] Always by your side by by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr]

Day 8: Hope / Vacation / In remembrance

In rememberance by by by @my0vershareworld [fanart featuring Askin Nakk le Varr x oc] Vacation by @bigjumpervibes [fanart featuring Gin Ichimaru]

If I have missed any entries, please tell me ASAP so I can add them here.

Depending on when the next cour is set to release, I may end up doing this event again. In the meantime, if you have any ideas for what we could do as a community to celebrate and create for BLEACH, don't be afraid the message me!

In the meantime, thank you again everyone!

#bleach #bleach returns 2023

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my0vershareworld · 10 months

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- Bleach Anime Celebration 2023 - Day 5 - Heart / Hobbies / Let’s discuss this over drinks

🔥im foul for this but it was worth it. u are all free to laugh

#ʜᴀꜱꜱʜᴇɪɴ #bleach returns 2023 #askin #askin nakk le vaar #askin bleach #bleach askin

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toshiro-taichou · 9 months

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Bleach Celebration 2023 fanfiction Yes sir

Not completed. Probably won't be completed after the 31st.

#bleach #bleach fanfiction #bleach returns 2023

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mkcannothelpyou · 7 months

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Menagerie I: Convalescence (Perfumer-Pallas)

1: "Gag", AK/Kinktober 2023

The evening begins at Pallas's lips.

"Quiescensia," Lena enlightens, bidding she know the name of the stalk that lays between them. "Just keep that in your mouth for the next thirty seconds or so."

The door hisses to a shut behind that softly locks the outside away. Mouthless, momentarily, not a greeting yet made to her nightward partner. There is the blur from engines far and deep away, the quiet sonic haze of the landship. That and naught else, aboard this lively vessel, seems quieter than silence.

Two women of Minos: A priestess gazes across the cased glade, a perfumer therein busying herself with the last of her preparations. The lights are dim over the entrance sprawl of the Convalescent Garden; cell of life's bleach-white sky, tamed. Now there are subdued shades, lakes of silvering across the ceiling to demure grey down the walls. Botanical sun has given way to the colour of a reservation for two, of privacy.

Were Pallas not shushed from the moment she entered, she surely would have complimented Lena on the mood lighting. As it is, the quiescensia remains in her mute lips. Her mouth's glands know it is there, can taste wisps of its essence in drops of liquid hunger that trickle against her gums. She gulps, once.

Lena concludes her tending. Pallas bows, bound by expectation of grace from both Lena and self not to gulp again.

Her stalk is removed from her mouth. "That should be enough time now. Good evening, Pallas," Lena speaks.

Evergold wisteria lit in the glowing blaze of dusk. Pallas is honoured to return the greeting.

Yet where she should have, where Good evening, Lena should have come her voice, there is nothing. Pallas's mind is met with askance by her ears. Her belief that she speaks seems not to be reciprocated by reality.

"What's wrong?" Lena asks, tone of concern brushed with a slyness, a secure sense of revelry. Unusual of Lena to hint at baring. Pallas is once again reminded that they are alone in this place tonight, but this time it strikes her that said night has begun.

Again, she tries to respond. Raises a perturbed hand to her face and casts her fingers wide, touching from her cheek to the base of her chin to her throat. My words do not seem to come, she wishes to tell Lena.

And she feels no movement whatsoever. Her eyes widen. Her ability to give voice is jailed. No—

"Mhmm. Quiescensia," Lena says once more, revelatory with a smile, a murmur that laps at her ears with the assurance of knowing what is wrong. The alarm does not subside; the alarm is repleted by fear of the doer, of the perfumer's whims. Ready as Pallas thought she was for this, she now remembers that Lena has wrought the priestess's sincerity as a toy each time to the same effect—it is like betrayal, like a sinking of the heart, and she has fallen in love with it.

No, Pallas was not ready for this; and it is precisely because she never can be, that she always is. In shock, in disbelief, in trepidation, in hunger, she nods with nary a whisper at Lena's voice.

"Potent, but what little you got from that quick taste won't freeze out your voice for more than half an hour. Any more could've started to hamper your breathing. A dose of pure extract would be as good as a full-blown toxin…" Lena twirls the stalk in her hand. "Now, Pallas, we have the evening ahead of us, and we wouldn't want things to go awry. Will you make sure to do as I say? Go on, say yes or no."

She tries to render any sound; forcing all air out of her lungs, Pallas musters little more than a sliver of a squeak by a twitch of her throat.

"Mmm. That'll do."

#BDSMKinktober #arknights #perfumer #pallas #ak/kinktober menagerie i

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rays-of-fire-and-ice · 10 months

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The Downpour

Hitsuhina Week 2023 - Day 4: Back to Back / I'm Sorry

Prompts: I'm sorry, downpour, [accidental] love confession

Rating: K/General

Setting: A few decades after the end of BLEACH

Synopsis: Is this how things are now? She clutches the umbrella tighter. How long is she going to keep her distance from him? Until he comes to her? Until she plucks up the courage to speak with him?

AN: oh no, I'm already running late with submisisons! XD

I decided to create something for Hitsuhina Week and for @yearoftheotpevent's challenge. In the end, I got a fic that I feel is a little out of my ball park but I still enjoyed writing! I hope you all enjoy it just as much!

______________________________________

Momo rushes between market stalls and shops on the way back to her division. The rain had started a few minutes ago, and although gentle now, she guesses by the darker clouds in the east a downpour is coming.

The Rukongai residents are also rushing about, but some have a moment to look at her umbrella in bewilderment, likely thinking they’d never seen any parasol like it before. It had been a very unusual gift from Shinji on White Day, but is now proving to be useful.

She reaches the gates surrounding the Seireitei five minutes later. Passing through them, she almost laughs at the irony of where she is. If she takes the shorter route back to the Fifth Division, she’ll be passing the Tenth Division. She didn't like how quickly the clouds are creeping across to the Seireitei, and she decides to risk it.

She comes across the occasional Shinigami rushing back to their barracks, one of which she manages to say a quick greeting to as they run past each other and laugh at their predicament.

The insignia of the Tenth division looms in the distance, painting on to the main barracks and standing tall above most of the buildings surrounding it.

As if it were a sign, she slows her steps to a stop at a crossroad when she senses Toshiro reiatsu. Whisps of it radiate from around the corner. He’s just outside of the of his division, it'd less than a minute before he reaches the main gate's entrance. Knowing him, he’s been out training and was taking his time returning to the division.

She has no doubt he’s sensed her too, but she knows why he hasn’t made a move to come and find her.

She winces at the thought of what happened just over a week ago. Her mind was hazy with a fever, and she’d been visited by Rangiku and Toshiro. Eventually, Rangiku left, and Momo stops the memory there. Despite the state of her mind, she remembers the next part too vividly, and if she goes any further, she might just die from embarrassment.

She shakes her head. Things can’t keep going on like this. Her heart starts to race at the thought. Is she really going to do this right now? The rain never bothers him, but she wants to get out of it as soon as possible. Still…

Forcing out a long exhale, she peaks around the corner with a stealth she normally reserves for missions. To her relief, his back is turned. He walks away from her in at a slow pace, his footsteps barely heard above the rain hitting the ground and roof tiles.

He may have sensed her, but she can still walk away, take a slightly longer route and avoid what will inevitably an awkward encounter. Now isn’t the right time, not in weather like this. She straightens and begins to walk with quiet steps to pass him. She only has to make seven strides and she’ll be out of sight. He won’t look over his shoulder, not if he wants to risk capturing her gaze. And if he is looking at her right now, she doesn’t see it, her gaze focused straight ahead.

She’ll be back at her division in ten minutes, and this encounter will never happen.

Is this how things are now? She clutches the umbrella tighter. How long is she going to keep her distance from him? Until he comes to her? Until she plucks up the courage to speak with him?

Despite herself, she stops out in the open. Slowly, she turns her head to him. He has to know she’s there, but he hasn’t looked back. And there’s something about the seeing him walk so slowly away. Is he giving her space? Or does he not want to talk with her?

He always puts others first, even if means he’s alone.

Her heartaches. How can I keep doing this?

She pivots and rushes to him. Her footsteps smack wetly against the pavement and make small splashes. She fights against the apprehension trying to tighten her throat and calls out, “Shiro-chan, wait!”

Toshiro flinches, perhas in deep thought before she called out. He comes to a stop and looks over his shoulder, eyes wide. “Hinamori?”

As she nears, she slows to a walk and tips the umbrella to come over his head. She hasn’t planned anything to say, so she blurts out the first thing that comes to mind. “You should stick to shelter, you might catch a cold.”

His usual expression returns. She can sense an eye roll, but he instead turns his gaze off to the side. “It doesn’t bother me.”

Not even a reprimand for calling him ‘Shiro-chan’; somehow, that disheartens her. “I-I know…I guess I --”

The rain buckets down over them, slapping against the ground and soaking their tabi, waraji, and the hems of their hakama. Momo gasps from the cold and almost loses her grip on the umbrella. She looks up at the sky in astonishment. “It happened so fast!”

Toshiro doesn’t appear all too surprised by the sudden change, but his eyes are back on her. For a second, she’s taken back to that moment over a week ago, to the concern he showed while he replaced the cloth over heated forehead with a fresh one; one that was much colder than the last, and it was because of him. She always…

She shakes her head. This isn’t the time!

She resists the old childhood habit of grabbing his wrist and taking him to nearest shelter; he always had the choice to shake her off, but he never did.

Instead, she gestures to and takes a few steps towards a nearby awning. “Come on, let’s take cover until it passes.”

_____________________________________

The rain turns into a downpour, thumping against the roof and sweeping the autumn leads from view. The sheets come down so thick it’s hard to make out what’s a few meters in front of them. For Momo it’s soothing, and it’s perhaps the reason she’s able to stand next to Toshiro right now without the awkwardness that has a norm for her.

She glances over at him. They’ve been standing here for more than five minutes without a word spoken between them. With the exception of how tightly his arms are folded into his sleeves, he looks otherwise unbothered. His gaze is soft, focused on the rain. He’d hesitated to join her under the shelter, but eventually same to stand next to her – albeit with a gap between them.

This feels so unnatural for them, but she instigated this, and she’ll see it through somehow.

“I haven’t seen rain like this in years,” she says.

She almost regrets breaking the silence, feeling she had disturbed the tranquility Toshiro had engulfed himself in.

Momo lets her nerves get the better of her and she rambles, “I guess you would’ve sensed it this morning, huh? With your powers to detect the weather, I mean.”

He shrugs flatly with a sniff. “I didn’t really notice it.”

Her shoulders fall at his indifference. “I’m sorry for making you sick. Rangiku-san told me you had a fever for a few days.”

“Don’t be, it might not have even been because of you.”

She clenches her fist and bows her head to him. “I’m also sorry I didn’t visit you. You came to see me, afterall.”

“It’s fine, as lieutenant you have to focus on your work first.”

Why did that hurt? Was it because of the matter-of-fact tone of his voice? The fact he brushed it off?

She purses her lips as she raises her head. “And I’m sorry about what I said, too.”

Finally, a crack in his demeanor. Even though it hadn’t been her goal, she can’t help but be a little relieved when his frown twitches, the corners of his lips tighten, and his eyes widen.

Still, she now has the awkwardness of bringing it up.

“I-I don’t know what I was thinking, it just came out,” she rambles on. “I was really sick and didn’t really know what I was saying. If you had the same fever as me, then you know how addled your mind could get.”

Still nothing from him, just a wide, unblinking stare. Rain drops that had been stuck to his face run down the sides and fall of his jaw. A spike of hair flops to one side. Still, he says nothing.

Was he remembering that moment?

It comes to her. She watched him as he faintly smile when she got him to get her sketchbook to show him her latest works. He’d recently started caring about her hobbies, would ask questions about them every now then – what book she was currently reading, what she had drawn recently.

Something about that moment, the way the sun came filtering through her window and dousing him in golden light. It highlighted his eyes to a bright blue. She’d always loved his eyes, never able to name the shade of blue-green they were.

Fatigue had started to set in, and he’d replaced the cloth on her forehead. He was standing to go. She didn’t want him to go just yet. They hardly saw each other these days. And she always loved his kindness, it felt like a side of him only she and a few others got to see upfront and unguarded.

She was tired, and her mind a haze. It slipped out, and despite how raspy her voice was, it was clear to both of them.

I love you.

For a instant, she’d thought she’d only said it to herself, but at his shocked expression, she knew he heard. The air around them had been shattered, once warm and comforting, to something disorientating, as if the world had tilted on it’s axis. Her face aflame, she tried to take her words back, but he stuttered something out, and left.

He has that same shock and disbelief right now, and all she wants is to pretend her words weren’t real. She doesn’t blame him, she can’t believe confessed something so heartfelt and bold accidentally. Her confession had been unintentional, but what she’d uttered was the truth, and he deserves to know that now.

“…The truth is, I’d hoped to tell you another time. I’m not exactly sure when that would’ve been, but…I meant what I said. It’s how I feel.”

His frown returns, and there’s a subtle shake of his head.

Her heart clenches. She doesn’t know when, but at some point, she’d hoped he felt the same way. A small part was even sure that he did when she reflected on how he’d been acting towards her last few decades – he smiled and laughed more, remembered her birthday and gave her gifts, and even made her ice roses for White Day several years in a row. But now she’s sure she’d misinterpreted everything.

“It’s all right if you don’t feel the same way.” I can live with it, she tells herself. And somehow, she knows deep down she could. It would take a while, but she’s certain she can put these feelings aside and come to see him as just a friend again. Surely she could, she’d done it before for others…

But the thought of doing that makes her want to cry. She bites the inside of her lip. This was a bad idea. What was she thinking? She’d let her nerves and worry get the better of her. She wants to be mad at him, for keeping his distance and for not saying thing, but she can only be angry at herself.

She bows to him. “I-I’m so sorry, this was a bad time to talk about it. I should’ve given more thought to this before I came and spoke to you. P-Please forget that this happened.”

She feels like a child, running away from her problems when they become too big and nebulous. She can’t stop the fresh have of embarrassment, and tears mist in her eyes. She starts to reopen her umbrella and step out from under the awning.

“Wait.” His voice comes out urgent. Momo keeps her gaze on the ground and her grip on the umbrella tight. For several seconds, all she can hear is her heart beating in her ears.

Toshiro looks alarmed, his hand even reaching out to her. As if just realizing this, he quickly draws it back to his side and his expression softens. “It’s not what you think.” He tries to school his expression to his usual stoicism, but he fails. “I’m sorry for leaving things that way. I just…didn’t expect it.” He swallows. “Any of it.”

She frowns, and with some hesitation, asks, “What do you mean?”

He doesn’t answer, and she knows he’s trying to find the right words. He might be more expressive than he used to be, but he still struggled to articulate how he felt sometimes. A part of her screams to just run away, because what he has to say may just cause her more humiliation or break her heart.

But she hasn’t come this far, today or to this point in her life, to run away from his side because of this. So she closes the umbrella again and returns to his side, closer than before, and waits.

Eventually, he sighs. “I never expected you to…feel that way. I don’t understand how you can feel that way. I don’t understand why me.”

Momo can’t help but tilt her head to one side. “Huh?”

Her confusion baffles him. “Don’t make me explain! It’s already -”

“I’m sorry, but, well…why not you?”

He’s stunned, opening and closing his mouth, trying to say something but has been left speechless. Eventually he shakes his head. “I always thought you would be someone with else.”

Clearly he didn’t want to answer the question, but the look on his face tells her everything she needs to know. He never saw her being with someone like him; he saw her with someone like herself.

She knows he takes pride in being punctual and organised, it’s perhaps the only positive traits he’s aware he has. Still, even after all these years, he can’t see the kindness he possess, or the thoughtfulness he displayed when she was vulnerable. He doesn’t see the way be contemplates things and takes his time to find the right words so he doesn’t come across as brutally honest. He doesn’t see the selflessness he shows in the smallest ways; where once he put other before himself because he thought another’s life was worth more than his, it’s now a virtue to him.

He's the constant, a throughline in her life, and she has seen him change and grow, just as he has with her. He’s seen her at her ugliest and most raw, and he never ran away. He stayed, he cared, and she loves him for that and so much more.

She could tell him all of this, compliment and reassure him until her voice disappears, but if he doesn’t believe it himself, it won’t do either of them good. No, now she just needs to keep it simple.

She smiles despite the rising embarrassment. “I l-like you because you’re you, Hitsugaya-kun.” Not as bold as her initial confession, but still true all the same.

If not for how serious this situation turned out to be, she would’ve teased him for the blush that colours his cheeks and the way his lips purse as if he’s tasted a lemon. He looks away and says something under his breath she doesn’t hear.

As the seconds tick by, she can’t ignore the building dread. “This changes things between us.”

Her words snap him out of his embarrassment, with his eyes becoming half hooded and a sigh deflating his shoulders. It takes him a while to calm his expression, but the blush still remains. "It doesn't."

She could weep in relief, but she manages to keep her composure. She goes to speak, to reaffirm that he doesn’t have to feel the same way – because knowing he avoided her more because he didn’t understand and not entirely because of her feelings calmed her – but his gaze stops her.

His eyes are soft and steely at the same time, tender and determined. He always has a lot going on under the surface, and she feels privileged to be one of the few who gets to see him look like this.

With her free hand, she reaches for his. Her fingers almost brush again his, but he closes the gap between them. His hold is loose and his hand is freezing from his reiatsu and the raindrops still clinging to it. The steeliness leaves his gaze, and he's vulnerable for a second, almost looking unsure. Do you really feel that way? he asks without saying it aloud.

She squeezes his hand and watches the downpour with him.

She desperately wants to ask if this mean he felt the same way as her, but maybe now is not the time. She's exhausted from the emotional highs, and he always takes the time to express himself.

His hold tightens. Again, she can almost cry.

For now, it’s enough.

#hitsuhina #hitsuhina week 2023 #toshiro hitsugaya #momo hinamori #bleach #fanfiction #angst #fluff and sappiness #it's not the ending I was expecting to write #but it felt right #ha that rhymes!

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