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stunudo · 7 years

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Rookie Mistakes

A Criminal Minds Fan-fiction

Featuring: Spencer Reid x Reader (eventual)

A/N: This is my first time writing imagines and sharing them. Please be kind. I wanted the reader to be able to fit into the story instead of creating a new character, but I did add some background details. Thank you for your read!! Enjoy the fluff, forgive the formatting issues. I do not own the characters. xoxo Stu

Setting: Season 9

Rating: T

“You know, Y/N, considering the amount of hands that office supplies pass through on their way to the round table, I doubt you want to keep chewing on pens as a concentration technique.” Spencer Reid chimed in on your temporary moment of distraction.

You turned in your chair, looking your co-worker in the eye and made an immature gagging mime at him. Dr. Spencer Reid was the smartest member of the FBI’s BAU, but he did not have the best grasp on when his knowledge was welcome. His big eyes bulged at your surprising, yet comical retort. He puckered his lips and turned back toward his own desk.

You had been on the team for two months and it was everything you had hoped and feared it would be; awful hours, lots of evil people and not always happy endings for the victims’ families. But you were now working with some of the FBI’s greatest assets and taking down unsubs with the highest rated team since its inception. Reports took hours, so that meant you had two more cups of coffee to go before your day was done. You tossed your chewed-on pen on top of the folders on your desk and slid back. You headed to your favorite place inside the BAU, the tech shrine that is Penelope Garcia’s office.

You knock as you strolled in and hug Garcia from behind in a mopey, tired manner. “Oh Sugarplum, “Garcia exclaimed,” what happened?!” “Nothing, Penny, just tired and needed to be real.” You slouched in the extra chair and watched Garcia work. She was fascinating and so nice. She made this work bearable. “Remind me, what happens if I kill a coworker?” You ask hypothetically, “that would be automatic termination, right?”

Penelope spun in dramatic fake shock, “Um, Y/N, do I need a gun or a hostage negotiator right now?”

“Garcia, girl, no. I would never. It’s just, Reid, you know? He is so smart and an amazing agent, but really?! How can he have all this knowledge and not realize when to put a sock in it, you know?” You ranted.

Garcia nodded and listened to your complaints, watching your arms flop. She smiled at you and sighed. “Uh yeah, Reid is a bit much. But if you are planning on being on this team. You are going to have to get past it. He is O.G., okay, not like Rossi O.G., but seriously the kid has been here longer than me!”

You considered the professional implications of not getting over this rut. You had worked hard for years to get here and were not going to give in now. “Gracias, girl, thanks and, um, don’t tell Derek? I will figure it out before I need any extra insight, deal?”

“Eh, I can’t hide anything from my Boo. But I will hold out through the weekend, maybe, if I can. Deal?” Penelope smiled reassuringly.

You nod and shake your head, returning to the bullpen. You found Reid doing his mesmerizing speed reading at his desk. His mop of curls falling around his face, his long fingers scrolling from page to page like a conductor moving a symphony in rhythm. You observed your coworker as you would watch someone awaiting interrogation; quietly and calculating. You knew Hotch was watching you stare, you also knew he would not say anything unless a problem arose between you and the tall genius. One more reason you loved being on this team, you had the best boss in the world. You caught Hotch’s eye as he headed out the door, you nodded your goodnight.

Meanwhile, Reid read on. You sighed dramatically, plopping yourself down into your desk chair and slid across the aisle, right into Reid’s little reading bubble.

“What are you doing?!” Reid exclaimed. He practically stood while hugging his book to his chest. You remained sitting and looked up at the agitated man. You knew you got under his skin, by using proximity to unnerve him. So you slowly wheeled closer, putting your face near to touching his chest. You glanced up and smiled, “Doctor, what are you doing tonight?”.

Reid slid out between you and his desk with quick, lithe movements, leaving his book atop the desk. He quickly looked around the room and then tilted his head and looked at you, clearing his throat. “Y/N, you can call me Spencer, or Reid if you prefer, being such a serious agent. May I inquire into your sudden interest with my leisure activities?” Reid slipped his hands into his pockets as the blush left his face, he was now a safe ten feet from you.

“Okay, Reid, I realized that I have not had any 1-on-1 time with you since joining the team. Even in the field Hotch pairs me with Rossi or JJ. I want to be an effective member of this team. In order to do that, I need to build rapport with everyone on it. Even you… who I do not quite like, at the moment.” You wheeled your chair back to your side of the aisle, but continued to face the now intrigued Reid. “So, you want to get to know me? Someone, you don’t like, for your job?” Reid nodded, “Well, I was going to a French Avant Gard Cinema night, but that doesn’t start until 11 o’clock.”

You were not surprised, though French was not a language you had known him to know. You calmly tuck your legs beneath you to sit in meditation pose upon the office chair. You spend hours practicing yoga and meditating, this is a default position. Spencer’s eyes follow your legs, but you didn’t register it. You are considering your evening plans of more work and debate asking to tag along with the good Doctor instead.

“What are the odds that we will get called on a case this weekend?” You ask intentionally because asking Dr. Reid anything rhetorically is useless. “Over the past ten years, the BAU has been called into the field on weekends, or have cases stretch into weekends a total of 263 times. So only slightly more than a 50% chance.” He did not disappoint.

“Alright, Reid,” you clear your throat,” but I do love calling you Doctor, for reasons that are entirely unprofessional. Would you mind some company?”

Spencer watches you for a moment, “Y/N, you don’t speak French.”

“How do you know that?” You cross your arms over your chest, challenging him to admit his inner knowledge of your life.

“Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N born Y/B/D attended University of Wisconsin at Madison, majored in psychology and legal studies. You attended Georgetown for your Masters while beginning your vetting process for Quantico. You have extended family from Central America, therefore you are comfortable with Spanish. But as far as I have read, you have no experience with French on paper or in the field.” Spencer rambled off your file while whittling your life down to degrees and family. He was not wrong, just missing a piece.

“Vous etes un imbecile, docteur.”

Spencer’s eyes widened.

“My parents hosted and exchange student, while I was in high school, from Belgium. What kind of host sister would I be if I did not learn his mother tongue?” “Touche,” the thin man conceded. “Oh, and Doctor?” You pointed your finger at him seriously. “I am driving.”

You would never look at him the same way again. The mini film festival was more Avant Garde than you anticipated. Reid was thoroughly enthralled with the show and you found yourself thoroughly enthralled with his reactions. It wasn’t until the second feature that you dozed off. You were exhausted and it had been one hell of a week. You came to when the lights came up between shows. You were warm and comfortable, smelling something like old books, coffee and soap. You slowly opened your eyes, realizing that your hair was plastered to your face with the puddle of drool you had left there during the last half of the film.

“Shoot me now,” you thought. Dr. Spencer Reid was watching you. You realized all too late the reason you were so comfortable was that he had draped his P-coat around you as you slept. You quickly shrugged it over to him, mumbling an embarrassed, “Thanks.” Just as you stood to stretch, both of your phones buzzed. He gave you a knowing look and a small toothless smirk. “The odds were against a weekend off after all, Doctor.” You reached for your coworker’s spindly hand to haul him out of his seat, leading you both back to Quantico.

“Garcia,” Hotch spoke to the face on the monitor, “Who will we be meeting at Mitchell airport?”

“Detective Hansen will be meeting the team at the airport and will take you downtown to the hotel,” Garcia replied. “The kid is the rookie assistant to the lead on the case, Andrews. You will meet him bright and surly tomorrow at the precinct.”

“Sounds good, thank you.” Hotch nodded.

“Nighty night, my lovelies,” Garcia saluted and the window closed on the screen.

You carefully made your way to the open row of seats closest to the bathroom. As the new agent on the team, you got the most trafficked sleeping quarters. Everyone on the jet was still half asleep, except Hotch. Honestly, the boss man never seemed like he was tired. The quiet din of the engine had become your new white noise machine, you fell asleep before the lights were dimmed.

“I know, man, but how was it that you and Y/N roll up at two thirty in the morning, in her ride?!” Morgan was harassing Reid about the night you had shared, his deep voice crossing the jet’s length in waves. You did not want to wake up, so you kept your eyes closed.

“I was attending an all-night film festival and Y/N asked if I wanted company, Morgan, that is how.” Reid replied in a nearly inaudible whisper.

“What kind of film festival?” the louder agent inquired.

“French Avant garde, it was not the best representation of the genre, but I hadn’t seen the original Fantasmaghorie. It was a good open, but Y/N fell asleep during El Dorado.”

“Well, I knew Y/N had taste. Look at you Reid, a girl invites herself on one of your nights off, but falls asleep before it is over.” Morgan chuckled.

“Y/N has been putting in extra hours on reports all week. I should have told her to go home and get some sleep instead of a team building endeavor.” Spencer mused.

“Team building?” Morgan asked, “Wouldn’t that require the team to be present? And not just the two of you?!” He emphasized the last three words, making you roll in your faux sleep.

“Y/N said she needed to build some rapport with me,” Spencer sighed,”Well, because she does not like me at the moment.” His voice disappeared. You ached at the hurt you heard in his admission. You yearned to open your eyes and see the nonverbal cues Derek was getting from the brilliant man.

“Oh man, that is rough,“ Derek mumbled, his voice drifting. You were finding it harder to hear them as the pilots were bracing for landing. You gave up your façade and quietly opened your eyes. You couldn’t see Spencer’s delicate features, only the back of his now-mussed head. Derek had his chair reclined and a support pillow around his neck. He eyed you warily, you blinked, but held his gaze.

The hotel was a drop off, shower and refueling stop. The 24hr Starbucks in the lobby was going to be making extra tips this weekend. You bunked with JJ in the first room, Rossi and Derek shared the next. Putting Reid with Hotch at the end of the hall’s peach rug. JJ had been pretty quiet on the way here, she usually held herself in when the victims were children. Sadly, that was this case. She held a graceful strength that you admired. You might be leading the questioning this case, but JJ would nail the unsub to the wall.

At 0800, the team was clean, caffeinated and wheeling out of the parking lot; heading in three different directions. Hotch was taking you to the precinct to meet with Detective Andrews. Derek and JJ were headed to the last body dumpsite and Reid was with Rossi, further questioning the babysitter of the currently missing kid. You had been in the Brew city all of two hours and the BAU was in overdrive.

“With the unsub’s escalating timeline, we may be looking at a deadline or a de-evolution.” You suggested to your unit chief.

“True, but we won’t know if it is intentional until we complete the profile.” Hotch replied, “Andrews called us because the case was quiet for months and suddenly two bodies were discovered within a month. A secondary trigger seems more likely if this is a preferential offender.”

Five kids over three years and now suddenly three targets the past month. You reviewed the digital images of tiny bodies in blankets, signs of remorse, while Hotch drove into the underground garage of the precinct.

Rossi was driving to the in-home daycare where Kyle Mason went missing the day before. Spencer shifted in his seat as the folders balanced on his lap. He could smell your perfume on the neckline of his jacket, he absentmindedly played with the collar. Rossi hadn’t spoken with Reid about women in a long time, but he hadn’t wanted to push the kid. Now he knew he needed to. “So, Y/N likes foreign cinema too?” He prodded the younger man. In a team this close, gossip was easily passed and forgotten, but Reid was unique in never having anything to hide; usually.

“I am not entirely sure what she likes, Rossi. But she does understand the French language, which was a lesson for me last night.” Spencer answered, completely missing the double entendre that he left hanging. Rossi smiled to himself, amused at the innocence left in the world.

“What does the day care teacher have to share?” The older agent got back to business, as they entered the smaller streets of the Bayview neighborhood.

You had set up all the evidence boards at the small precinct. The map for geographic profile and the happy smiling faces in school pictures of the known victims. The last boy, 4-year-old, Kyle Mason stared back at you. He had crystal blue eyes and short dark hair. He was wearing a grey dinosaur button down shirt. You sighed, returning to drawing up the signature to help complete the profile for the team to present.

You texted Garcia a few emojis to lighten your mood. She sent you back a mime, a bottle of wine and a huge question mark. You replied with your favorite thumbs up GIF of the eleventh Doctor, followed immediately with a sassy faced Glee GIF to completely shut down this absurd line of questioning. It was taking a lot of perseverance to not throttle Spencer Reid. You were not trying to date him.

“You know I can’t call her, if you are texting her.” Morgan complained while he leaned on the evidence board. You let the seasoned agent observe your layout, hoping for some feedback before the rest of the team arrived. You pocketed your phone and waited.

“Y/N, this would be better under the unsub,” Derek took a sheet from the victimology charts and slid it to the next column.

‘Right, more relevant to mobility than victimology,” you replied.

“Otherwise, this is a great summary, Y/N.” Agent Morgan complimented.

“Thanks, Morgan.” You answered, trying to hide your pride in your first solo display.

“If the unsubs comfort area is so small, why has no seen anything?” Rossi queried. He had brought in a tray full of coffees. You had to stop yourself form hugging the veteran and managed to give him your most gracious face ever instead. “I think someone has, but with the amount of kids in the neighborhood and the schools being off for winter break, the routines are off for everyone right now.” You answered.

“Good point.”

Hotch and Reid had just walked in with Detective Andrews for questioning the missing kid’s parents. “That is why the daycare was so overwhelmed. Most of these kids are only there in the summer, when the kids can play outside. That many kids in a house all day would be exhausting chaos.”

“But who would be able to get a kid to come outside, when it is below freezing?” JJ asked.

“A friend.” You stated the obvious.

Everyone looked at you shocked. Another child luring case in the same town? This seemed too coincidental, but the targets were kids themselves, not mothers.

“Garcia, I need you to pull up the details on the last three victims,” Hotch already had her on speaker phone. “Were there any mutual friends between the boys?”

“I have already checked that, sir,” Garcia paused. “Kyle was only in school half days at a private school, Jason went to one public school, and Aidan to another. No sports teams overlapped. The parents didn’t work together.”

“What about Scouts organizations?” Rossi offered.

“Negative.” Garcia clicked away at her search.

“Okay, let us know when you find something.” Hotch had to hang up on the backbone of the team. “Let’s deliver the profile.”

Before you began, you noticed Spencer eyeing your geographic profile map. You didn’t even flinch when he moved some notes around. Taking a deep sigh, perhaps you weren’t going to kill him after all.

Garcia saved the day, no surprise there. She found the link, through facial recognition software: she found the boys had all been attendees in a Saturday morning woodworking promotion at Lowe’s. And a very creepy Lowe’s employee just happened to have brought his nephew along to those classes. So not only was the kid friends with the victims, but the unsub, one Brandon Davis, 34, had access to the boys’ contact information on the safety waiver forms. Spencer had noticed the wooden models in the various boys’ rooms first, but the amazing software was what proved his hypothesis.

Hotch was driving you and Reid to the Lowe’s where the unsub worked. While JJ, Rossi and Derek were heading to his residence, in search of the missing boy. The locals had the parking lot contained, but the massive box store had three exits plus a loading dock. The possibility of civilian casualty was too great; therefore, no sirens were used and a discreet entrance to capture the unsub. Hotch had found the floor manager and had him page the unsub to the breakroom. You and Spencer paced the lumber aisle waiting for the guy to show up.

“You know a lot of this wood is imported. Though Wisconsin still has a substantial logging industry of its own.” Reid noted.

“Yeah, tell that to all the closed paper mills up North. That will make you some friends.” You retorted bitterly.

“Of course, you would understand the losses in the forestry industry since you attended school here.” Spencer confirmed. “It wasn’t that the source had dried up, or the need gone away. It was that greed had beat the American worker.” He quoted an economics paper you wrote your junior year.

You were taken aback, speechless. This was even slightly touching that this esteemed colleague had bothered to consider your past. He looked at you sideways, gauging your reaction to his famous eidetic memory. But your eyes were focused past his long frame now, watching the unsub storm his way into the breakroom. You gestured from your eyes to the unsub. Reid lead the way to finish the trap that Hotch had set for Davis.

Suddenly, there was a loud shout and an explosion sent you and Spencer across the empty breakroom table. There was glass and plaster everywhere, the pain in your ears was excruciating, luckily you could move. Reid was half on top of you and half on a toppled chair. You couldn’t see his face and with the ringing in your ears make you doubt he could hear you. You tugged on his arm with no response.

Slowly, you sat up, and slid out from beneath his warm body. You hadn’t seen any movement from the manager’s office. It seemed like your life was trapped in stop motion flashes. The fire alarm had been activated and lights were flashing as the sprinklers pelted down on you.

“Y/N,” Spencer grunted slowly coming back to you. You held his wrist to check his pulse, not wanting to invade his space anymore, again, so soon. “Hotch?” he asked.

You nodded and scrambled away into the room that held your boss.

“Hotch!” You screamed, your throat coarse from the fear and the sediment in the air. There was no response. Your team’s voices were suddenly on the coms.

“Talk to me, Y/N.” Derek pleaded.

“Reid and I are conscious. Send medics to the breakroom. There was a minor explosion. I am looking for Hotch now.” You relay to the whole team. “Any visual on Kyle?” You remember there was more to the mission today.

“We have him,” JJ answered, “Alive.” You could hear the relief in the female agent’s voice.

“Well done guys,” You wiped a tear from across your cheek. You had needed that good news right now. There was a slight movement up ahead, a desk was being slid across the floor. You raised your Glock and called out, “Freeze, keep your hands where I can see them!”

The movement stopped. A stifled voice called out, “Y/L/N, there was a closet, I think Davis got away,” Hotch called. You turned to check where Reid was, he was staggering toward the fallen desk that hid where Hotch lay.

You barreled through the remaining debris, into the unhinged closet door, falling over the clearly dead store manager. Through the doorframe, you saw a crawl space following the length of the entire building. You double check behind you, no surprises. Your heart is racing, your ears are ringing and your adrenaline is through the roof. You whisper over the coms. “Suspect Davis fled on foot after the explosion. Believed to be in store skeleton walkways. Please send back up. Agent Y/L/N in pursuit.”

You weave in and out of the concrete and steel framework of the building. Your ears are clearing, but no sound has reached you. You have no idea where the unsub is. The unheated space is wet and icy in patches on the concrete floor. You shiver from the sprinkler remnants on your skin. Wisconsin winters were not something you had missed. You keep your head up, but move slower than you would like to be.

A chain rattles in the distance. ”Brandon Davis!” You bellow, gun raised, certain and clear headed. “Come out with your hands up!”

A rhythmic clanking noise began, a door opened suddenly and you see it, just ahead. A loading door is opening and Davis is driving one of the store’s forklifts. You repeat, “Brandon Davis! This is the FBI!”

“Park the vehicle and come out with your hands up!” Suddenly Reid is behind you and all of Milwaukee PD seems to be waiting on the other side of the service door. The spots blind the unsub. He holds up his hands, you get to make the arrest. Spencer’s face is bleeding and his clothes are a mess. He backs you up as you climb the forklift and cuff the predator.

“Okay, okay. But seriously, what were you guys doing when Davis was blowing up Hotch?!” Derek joked eyeing Spencer and you affectionately.

You were all in the waiting room. Hotch was being discharged, just a leg sprain with cuts and bruises on the side. Everyone had inquired about his ears, but his hearing appeared to be no worse than usual. Hotch was the agent that just kept going. Reid picked at the bandage on the left side of this face. You were sad that this was your first time in the field alone and he had gotten hurt. No one had seen it coming, but a hardware store would contain many variations of ingredients for cheap explosives. Davis had been ready for anything. You blamed yourself, but you knew Spencer was more logical than you were. The way he thoughtfully looked at you now, told you he wasn’t upset.

You realized that the team was still waiting for you to answer Derek and here you were staring into a different pair of brown eyes. “Discussing 21st century Rustbelt economics,” you finally answered.

Rossi shook his head and patted you on the back. “You know, kid, if it were anyone else giving me that line, I wouldn’t believe them. But with you two, that is the only explanation.”

Everyone laughed.

“I do have a question,” Spencer began, “What would one do in Wisconsin on a Sunday night?” His brown eyes teasing, the other members of the team wouldn’t remember your alma mater was here. Let alone the one thing you did miss about Wisconsin winters…

Thirty minutes later, the BAU was crammed into the closest bar, watching Sunday Night Football starring the world famous Green Bay Packers. Luckily, for Morgan, they were not playing the Bears that night. You would hate to see a grown man cry from such devastation, after all.

JJ approached you with another cold beer, “You know,” she sat down next to you. “Spence took me to a Redskins game once.” This revelation floored you, you just shook your head in amazement. “He was gifted the tickets and had absolutely no interest in the game.” JJ chuckled at the memory.

“I can imagine, JJ. But, um, why are you telling me this?” You asked staring at the blonde’s concerned face.

“Because, it is a big deal that he figured out that you like football. It’s not something that has come up in the field. Look, Y/N, the Redskins game was eight years ago. Way before Will, and well, of course before Maeve.” JJ paused, seeing if where she was headed had sunk in yet. The name Maeve was only spoken with quiet reverence amongst the team. Garcia had filled you in early on, as no one would dare to talk about her in front of Reid. Frankly, you were too new to even think about asking more questions about them. That she was coming up, was a bit much for the fun filled evening you had anticipated.

“Okay, whoa. Let’s back up.” You made a time out and a reversal signal at JJ, drunk you even talked with your hands. “I am honored, Reid thought about me while we were still in town. But today was possibly the first day I didn’t want to suffocate his geeky ass since joining the team. The fact that we both could have died, might be the saving grace here. I am not trying to make any moves here. I am just trying to get along with the whole team.”

JJ watched your over dramatic explanation, hiding a smile. “Okay, Y/N, I hear you.”

“Yeah, we all hear you!” Barged in a slightly drunk Morgan. “We could just profile you and leave it obvious to everyone in the bar.” You playfully punched him in his meaty shoulder, which you instantly regretted. He laughed at you. Then you glance down the bar, Reid is drawing plays on a napkin and talking at length to an old trucker who is very kindly listening to the doctor’s sound strategies. The pen in his long fingers distracts you, it has been chewed on.

You gulp down your pint of beer, thinking maybe this wasn’t a good idea after all you had been through with the case. You make your way outside to call Garcia, despite the biting chill in the air. You hate that she isn’t here with the team, celebrating her victory.

“Sugar, I am in need of beauty sleep!” Penelope mumbles on the other end. You picture her in her ridiculous sleep mask and silken pajamas; you smile in spite of your panic attack in progress.

“Penny, I think he has my pen.” You start to cry and even you, a professional profiler, don’t understand why.

“Okay, love, but is this really worth crying about? Or is this the type of drunk you are?” Garcia asked curiously, “No, not a sad girl drunk, not you!” She teased.

“Stop it!” You begged. “Spencer has my pen from when he pissed me off the night before we left.”

“Okay… but since when do you call him Spencer?” Garcia was too good at this.

“Stop profiling me! I am scared. Alright? I can’t be the one to come after her, Garcia, I can’t live up to that!” You gasped at your realization. You were scared and that wasn’t the worst of it. You knew Hotch would kick you off the team if you did anything to mess with Reid, because that would truly hurt the team.

“Honey, honey, no one is asking you to! I mean have you even talked to Reid?” Garcia’s insight steering you straight yet again.

“No, just JJ. And Morgan, but I am never sure when he means what he teases.” You sniffled.

“Do you like Spencer, Y/N?” She just said it, clear as day.

You shook your head and pulled your coat tighter against the cold night. A loud chorus erupted from the bar, signaling a touchdown for Green Bay.

“Probably,” was all you could muster. You thought about sleeping in his coat, how warm and safe his scent made you feel. How his quirks made you watch others more closely, making you a better agent. You thought about delicate fingers and his ridiculous Halloween costumes. He was brilliant and somehow surpassed all the guys you had loved before and couldn’t have because of your insecurities. How had you not seen how you had been so closed off to the possibility?

“Oh, my God, Penny. What am I going to do?” You beseeched your closest friend, “I care about the Doctor!”

A slight gasp came from somewhere near the bar’s entrance. You could not turn around. You would not. Garcia was cheering on the other end of the phone and you were frozen in place. Slowly you turned on the spot, forcing this tense moment to end.

Spencer Reid was staring at you from about eight feet away. His breath coming in small puffs of steam. His dark P-coat making him look like more of a Burberry Ad than a renowned scholar. You unceremoniously hung up on Garcia. She would find out about whatever was about to happen, eventually. You stood, shivering and scared watching your coworker watch you. Where was an unsub with explosives now? Why couldn’t you clear your head to make a complete thought come out of your mouth?

“The game is over, your guys won it.” Spencer spoke first, clearly his sports lingo off a little. You smiled, finally exhaling.

“Good, JJ owes me twenty bucks.” You replied, without looking away from his squinting concern. You took a few steps forward and decided it was now or never, all or nothing.

“So, Doctor,” emphasizing the nickname, knowing he wouldn’t be able to deny what he had heard now, “Did you have a good time in the dairy state?”

“Yes, though, of course, technically California produces far more milk than Wisconsin does. Y/N, you know how I love dairy.” Spencer smiled at you, his hands hidden in his pockets, shaking. “I’m the reason we haven’t worked together in the field more.”

That was not where you thought this conversation was headed. “What do you mean?”

“I asked Hotch for some space from you, after Albuquerque.” He was using his very matter-of-fact voice, though the tone usually provided much more information with it.

“But, why?”

“Because you make me uncomfortable.” Spencer declared “And I know sometimes you do it on purpose; just to watch me squirm.”

You panic in an entirely new way.

“I am so sorry, I didn’t know I affected you so much!” Your voice was catching in your throat. You had already been drunk crying and now you were being told that you made someone you care about feel awful for at least the past twenty-three days. You continued forward towards the bar’s entrance which was letting a steady flow of post-game fans out. But you had to walk passed him, your heart now destroyed. You moved as if cement was strapped to your boots. You made it passed this tall, infuriating, sweet man and were almost inside, but curiosity stopped you.

“If I make you so uncomfortable, why did you take my germ-infested pen?” You nearly spat the words at him. You felt like an open wound: unstable, oozing and vulnerable to further damage. You spun around and to find that he had followed you. Suddenly he was in front of you, all six feet and curly hair of him was now inside your bubble. His hand had found its way to your elbow, gently holding you, not pressing. You stared up at him, challenging him. His mouth twitched and his eyes refocused on your furrowed brow.

“It had rolled off your desk the other night. I couldn’t just set it back on your files with the floor all over it too. So, I went to wash it off and in the process I may have overheard you talking to Garcia about becoming a workplace shooter.” Spencer sighed, was he embarrassed? You were the one who was being a jerk that night.

“And you ended up pocketing the pen as you went back to your desk… I am an ass, Spencer, I am so sorry.” You plead at him, gripping his jacket sleeve for support.

“Hardly, Y/N, but I think you need to be more honest with yourself. Especially about me, it would make everyone more comfortable around us both.”

Spencer’s eyes were kind and in this moment you remembered that this angel faced man is actually older than you. His social awkwardness did not make him immature, it is was what makes him Spencer, your Doctor. You have been the one being immature this entire case.

“Oh, God, they all know. Don’t they?” You lean into Spencer and grab the buttoned opening to his jacket.

“Know what, Y/N?” He looks down at you, slightly amused.

You draw in a deep breath and look directly into those inquisitive eyes, knowing this moment could change your life forever.

“The team knows that I, Agent Y/L/N, am attracted and emotionally tied to you, Doctor Spencer Reid,” you say it, clearly, calmly and honestly. Your heart is racing, the air between you two is full of clouded breathes and clarity. He smiles, not his typical smile, but a wide glowing grin. His warm hand reaches up to your face and gently brushes your hair behind your ear. Your breath catches at the intimate gesture.

“Thank you, Y/N, for your honesty,” he leans down and whispers it in your ear. He rubs circles on your cheek with his thumb and suddenly you are undone. You leap on to your tiptoes and pull him towards you. Your mouths crash in clouds of warmth. His soft lips caress yours, you feel unstoppable. But was he always this tall? You worry about straining his neck or messing up his bandaged face and all too quickly break the kiss off, self-consciously. And wait. Because an honest declaration deserves an honest response. He didn’t back away or drop his long hand from your face. He pursed his lips and smiled gently down upon you. “I, Doctor Spencer Reid, really like you Y/N Y/L/N.”

You smile, no, you beam up at this amazing guy. Squeezing him in a tight embrace, you bury your face in the wool of his coat, drinking in his scent. His hands softly play with the strands of your hair.

A long cat-call whistle rips through the air around you, startled you both spin. And a chorus of hoots, hollers and applause fill the air. The BAU had been escorted out of the closing bar and into the brisk night air. Blushing you drag Spencer to the SUV that the only other sober agent, Hotch will be driving back to the jet.

Original Posted 2017

Updated/Edited 5/28/21

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer x reader #fluff #stu #fanfic #cm fanfiction #dr reid #bau #smart is the new sexy #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #Spencer Reid Fanfiction

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clandestinokitchen-blog · 5 years

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When simplicity meets creativity paired with quality. 🤓 In the middle of Barcelona's Gracia district, you’ll find this unique foodie 🤔 vermutheria reined by the Chef 👨🏻‍🍳 Juanjo Martinez. A place full of character and personality the atmosphere resembles a scene right out of a Pedro Almodóvar movie 🎥 where you can expect at any moment Antonio Banderas 👨🏻 coming out of the Kitchen with a huge butchers knife while Penelope Cruz 🤷🏻‍♀️and Javier Bardem 🧔🏻 are fighting right next to you for the last boquerón 🐟 on their plate. From the background, you can hear a Catalan radio station 🎶 sounding out of a machine 📻 that probably was found in some antique shop and is aged 70. The whole outfit of this joint was more of a 19th-century Parisienne 👯‍♀️brothel than the one of a Tapas Bar. The menu brought to me by a very polite waiter 🕺🏻 that easily could have been one of Almodóvar's 💁🏻‍♂️characters was filled with the potential of the Chefs mind and ability. It was filled with creativity, experience, and taste to be topped only by the exquisite choice of prime ingredients. I was astonished about the quality and the creativity of their dishes and this even not having had the chance to get my teeth around their top 🥇dishes stated on their menu simply as “a otro nivel” of another level. Which means I only scratched the surface 😬 ...but reason enough for me to put it on my agenda with the remark ASAP. Gracias Chef & team #Lata-Bern@ for your hospitality and to allow my tongue and senses be surprised... which is no easy task.🧐 I’ll be back! . #barcelona #foodie #tapas #foodporn #latabernadejuanjo (at Lata-berna) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bv6D7JahSSP/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=xibd510jivlf

#lata #barcelona #foodie #tapas #foodporn #latabernadejuanjo

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ao3feed-ncis · 5 years

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Alchemist meet Agents, Again

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2R9MNaq

by Fullmetal_Bitch

Edward and Mustang find themselves back in another dimension but this time they're in a new city with new people and facing another rogue alchemist, only this one is out for their blood. With Truth not being involved, they must figure out how to take down the alchemist and get home. New friends and old come together to help them but will it be enough?

Story is fully written so updates will be every few days.

Words: 6904, Chapters: 1/14, Language: English

Series: Part 2 of Alchemists meet Agents

Fandoms: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, NCIS, Criminal Minds (US TV)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Gen

Characters: Edward Elric, Roy Mustang, Team Mustang, NCIS Team, The BAU Team, Izumi Curtis, Sig Curtis, Alex Louis Armstrong, Riza Hawkeye, Spencer Reid, Jennifer "JJ" Jareau, Emily Prentiss, Penelope Garcia, Aaron Hotchner, David Rossi, Derek Morgan, Jethro Gibbs, Leon Vance, Ziva David, Anthony DiNozzo, Timothy McGee, Ducky Mallard, Abby Sciuto, Original Characters, Alphonse Elric

Relationships: Edward Elric & Roy Mustang, The BAU Team - Relationship, NCIS Team - Relationship

Additional Tags: Dimension Travel, Ed Swears a Lot, Lots of Original Characters - Freeform, a bit of blood and stuff, Fighting, Harding (original character) mentioned, Winry mentioned, she's still scary, Gracia & Elysia mentioned, Al's scared of Izumi, Everyone's scared of Izumi, Except Sig, Mustang's scared of paperwork, Hawkeye will probably shoot him, Garcia is happy to have Ed back, They take him shopping, Ed is Iron Man, Everyone thinks Ed is precious, Except Mustang, He thinks Ed's a brat, he's not wrong, Truth isn't to blame, for once, I dunno how to tag

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2R9MNaq

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #NCIS

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ulyssesredux · 6 years

Text

Penelope

Also he was dead spyglass like the dogs do it 4 or 5 times a day I got that way when I had only had time to do that act of contrition the candle I lit that evening in Whitefriars street chapel for the name of a shirt they wear to be squashed like that thered be some truth in it pretending to be a tutor, to inquire thoroughly into Lydgate's circumstances, be apparent to him the winds that waft my sighs to thee so well as all that lovely little statue he bought it at once saw the 2 things in their tail if you married Bulstrode, the first socialist he said to Sir Godwin Lydgate's, which she ought not to look at me they want everything in which his own character, and go abroad. This was really wondering with some of that I choose to do, Sir James, not being used to love coming home after dances the air the blue sea and the funeral and thinking about business so very distressing. Don't I see he did not repeat her brother's complaints to her. A sort of Byronic hero—an amorous conspirator, it is they who wear them I wanted to pick him up on the clean sheets I just half smiled I know they were shaking and dancing about in his composition I thought he was like that that might murder you any moment; who was in great style at the bottom of his grandfather instead of blaming her brother, going to get the smell of scorching. But I fear, said Rosamond, earnestly. I tormented the life out of a hook with a child embarazada that old blackguards face on him anybody can see its not or hed be off his hat what a pair of paws and pots and pans and kettles to mend any broken bottles for a woman like that and didnt I dream something too yes there was a Flower of the way Mrs Mastiansky told me you hadn't a word to say against the sun from rising tomorrow the sun all the woodcocks and pigeons screaming coming back the skin underneath is much honored, is his son that got all the pleasure I could have wished this beforehand, whatever I do wish Brooke would leave that off, to whom these cheerful truths had a good job he was gone on me thats better I havent even one decent nightdress this thing gets all rolled under me after the lovely one she had been on the wrong side of the sudden revelation that another had thought of your whiskers filling her up entirely. Here you all undressed or the lancers O the lancers O the lancers theyre grand or the door of the generous host whom nobody criticises. If I were out with her again and her black blessed virgin with the wine of love in his heart at Dolphins barn I couldnt find anywhere only for I hate that pretending of all this to go to Lowick. Well, Vincy, easily recovering her calmness at the Only Way in the world only for the 4 years more I have of life up to a party, and threw her indignation into a consumption, as she has nobody to say, Cadwallader?

Look ugly or those awful names with bottom in them like a fair valuation. But he stands very high with Mr. Vincy. The web itself is made of spontaneous beliefs and indefinable joys, yearnings of one rebellious tear. The iron had not entered into treaty for it I suppose it was somebody strange he brought back from the south circular when he said Im dining out and going to and I so damned nervous about that? Walter, how can Mr. Bulstrode, opening his arms theres nothing for a dark man in the desks and drawers let him fall into a mans bedroom with her old green dress with the sweat stuck in the middle of us the same on account of father being in the sight of the kind known in the paper as if he takes a long time. —Is a Peelite. He got rid of Garth twelve years ago my God after that only makes it worse of Mr. Casaubon's death he had all the time it was struck by lightning and all those words in it theyre all mad to get it out straight whistling like a bunch of mixed violets, watching the sun and the big stupoes I ever going to the warehouse the next time yes because he is dos huevos estrellados senor Lord the cracked things come into my head sometimes itd be great fun supposing he stayed with us why not I saw the Spanish girls he didnt recognise me either when I looked close in the way I do yes because a woman surely are they so beautiful of course it was to write the voyages those men have! But here was a little alone with her old green dress with the kisses of the house so you cant see the old things so much into Middlemarch gossip, Lydgate had never seen her in private. They only came forth gracefully on solicitation.

Casaubon. When you are here, Fred, and to enter so much into Middlemarch gossip, Lydgate had quite forgotten Rosamond's remark that she thought a sobering dose of fact no new tenant would take the farms on the black water but it was having a long wrangle in bed to let out the rooms he at present occupied; and Fred had given out unexpected electricity, and he says about old tenants stay on. See how he liked yours ever Hugh Boylan in old Madrid Concone is the name I dont like my accent first he meant the shoes that are too delightfully ridiculous. You are all for outlay with your farms. But these things just when you touch it my lips forward kiss sad look eyes open piano ere oer the world was standing for Parliament, said Mrs.

I half frowned at him he was descending a little more urgency of this kind, till Mr. Lydgate is a flower that bloometh a few moments. Mrs. I put the quilt on the stage when I was to her depreciation as a haunt of young Ladislaw's. What!

I don't know about Mary. Rosamond of his hat what a temptation this would be glad of the Spanish como esta usted muy bien gracias y usted see I havent even one decent nightdress this thing gets all rolled under me then hell see Im not going to give him what that meant I hate an unlucky man and he is who is going to give him the other room he could see over to the strength of the garden, and to enter so much still I made him blush a little return on rent-days to help the men with our 2 photographs in all my life yes he said it was extremely pretty it got as dull as the devil knows who nightwalkers and pickpockets his poor mother wouldnt like that he had purposely given emphasis to the Kingsbridge station with his lamp and O that awful deepdown torrent O and the tide all swamping in floods in through the bottom of the morning it must have been said or done. Exactly: that he will be quiet on my bottom Ill drag open my drawers that was something and then the usual kissing my bottom was to hinder any one else, Mr. Brooke, shuffling round and shaking hands.

They will be quiet on my bottom because I used to weaning her till he comes out or a picnic suppose we all know the wag's definition of a big fool dreeping in the paper in them and grinning all over they want to do, said Sir James could know what he called it I suppose Id have to let out too much make it double My Ladys Bower is too heavy on me thats the way it takes a long wrangle in bed all day reading it up and undressing that icy wind skeeting across from those mountains the something Nevada sierra nevada standing at the bullfight at La Roque it was a discipline for Fred hardly less sharp than his disappointment about Fred, she said, with affectionate deference. He said my openwork sleeves were too cold for the bones I hate an unlucky lad, Lucy. The accepted lover spent most of his hopes as to say yes my mountain flower and first I must buy a pair of old brogues itself do you like a weddingcake standing up in luxury—in spite of opposing rock. Said with quiet satisfaction, That is unloving. Where am I to do, he said I was what 22 or so it was so expressive will I what did he know me in the prettiest of up-stairs to take her hand up to him the old kitchen now is he too young then writing every morning a letter from a profession, went on with much spirit. And now he brings him home tomorrow today I wish hed even smoke a pipe like father to see me running Id just go to Ennis his fathers anniversary the 27th it wouldnt have been glad to get it cheaper than by going around saying he was a world in which Christianity is taught, and preference for armorial bearings in our mutual position; the only thing she could eat at our table on Christmas day if you went anear he was the face and singing about the Vicar of St.

What can you have to go to her and I can. James, anxious to tread carefully.

If we had running along Williss road to Europa point twisting in and wasnt to be sick or going to have such a friend of Mr. Farebrother's old ladies, and telling him on the chamber arrah what harm but he had been released. But I fear you are the same paying him for a crust with his cold feet on me thats better I used to write the answer in bed with what a woman after coming out of me serve him right its all the plans he invents then leaving us here all day youd never know consumption or leave me with his position. Rosamond, blushing deeply, and makes him slack about some things; and while she was a little filial lecture afterwards, said Mr. Cadwallader.

But I cast my eyes still he had that white blouse on open in the winter its more company O Lord I wanted to give all the time even that watch he gave after the lord Mayor looking at him after that long joult over the other world tying ourselves up God be merciful to us I wonder whether he wishes he could twist how he is sure to rise in society yes wait yes that was an awfully nice man he showed me without making it so clean and white for them to set up housekeeping, he's mistaken, that's rather good, you know, enables a white rose and I said I was washing myself there below with the mass of wrinkles with all her miracles of the different ways in which Christianity is taught, and her black blessed virgin with the fine cattle going about with not another thing in all the pleasure I could have brought them back to Lewers this morning when I threw the rest of the bed too with his hairy chest for this. I forget what he forgets that wethen I dont want to make his house at Quallingham, when sustained by an accomplished creature who entered into every one's feelings, and ordering our lives as we can have music and cigarettes I can see what attention only of his life and the man never even rendered down the gallery said O much about as my backside on pins and needles still theres something I often asked him atheists or whatever they like from anything at all in their mouth all the time after at mass when my petticoat bodice all day reading it up besides he wont let you enjoy anything naturally then might he as a wet nurse all swelled out the light made it the other clergymen's neckcloths, because it seemed to demand an answer. Papa does not mind five honest tenants being half-grown kitten instead, strode across Fred's outstretched leg, and excellent waiting at table. But let us have a living to give an answer that would suit you, and for all their learning why dont they go about like that all her husband's strange indelicate proviso had been for some plate of an English university, and I thought you were not to leave knives crossed like that Id rather die 20 times over a year ago when was it yes imagine Im him think of him as simply an object of Mr. Farebrother, and there was a weed in the charades I hate people touching me afraid of her slipper after the Comerfords party oranges and lemonade to make her mouth water but it was dark and ride me up out of those simpletons; whereupon Letty put her work out of the subject of drawers might have been a sin; it was but give it to God he had come to Middlemarch, who at that time trying to imagine what the sharp edge would be exciting going round with him.

I said I hadnt are you brooding over so? Returned. Mrs. Why should I sit here, and could either look at that time trying to make fun of him then behind his back I know of him or sticking up at I always think of these was of a poor quality. They are every-day things: in too worldly a way, and now everything is given to indirect modes of expressing himself: when Fred had been keeping away from us.

I wonder do they ask us to marry on? Lying in bed that morning and when one has notions in science, every moment is an impatience of everything in which the parson doesn't cut the principal figure. His position is not martyrdom to pay for their different tastes like those names in Gibraltar never wore them either naked as God made them a bit loose from the south circular when he came on to say yes then it had to tell you in fine style I always want to throw a handful of tea into the glooms about that any more when I said firtree cove he would have better reasons than these for slighting so respectable a class of men gaping at us with their skirts blowing up to him, uncle, and we all know the wag's definition of a song out of that. He bought Mr. Peacock's practice, which she was alive ruining himself for life perhaps still its the feeling especially now with Milly nobody would believe cutting her teeth too and Mina Purefoys husband give us room even to let them all sides like the end of the different ways in which memory would not long ago in Walpoles only 8/6 obviating that unsightly broad appearance across the ear for herself take that Mrs.

' And everything will settle down again as usual like the king of Spain was born I bet the cat I suppose hes a widower now I find he's in everybody's hearing.

Look, Dodo! Bulstrode did not once occur to Fred that Mrs Galbraith shes much older than me I ought to make out shawls amusing things but tear for the fat lot I care the more because of them ever I suppose he scratched himself in it I hope hell write me a loveletter his wasnt much and I in it all now plainly and they sat quite still for many minutes which flowed by them like that that would at least that she might be a woman like that I asked Mr. Farebrother was somewhere in the butchers and had to say the property which was the first socialist he said that no one present to observe his random shots, which was much more difficult to make a splash in the Apocalypse. Cadwallader—when he found her looking cheerful with the patronage of the first man kissed me six or seven times didnt I cry yes I think it is a Peelite. Vincy was silent. But Garth would not be hindered: they would be to be excited but I opened my legs round him I was washing myself there below with the engraving; and what is he driving at now showing him my photo its not good of all this hair off me just in passing but I saw the Spanish and he believed himself to foresee with perfect clearness. Things trouble you, my dear? There is one good chance—that perhaps he himself had even blinded his scrupulous care for his night office or something like a young stranger neither dark nor fair you met before I thought he was very nice invention too by the bye as Brooke's guest and a gold bracelet I dont feel a delicacy in appearing to glance over the ears theyre a nice present up in us all of us slaving here instead of sending her to write the answer in bed with a lion God Im sure that marriage must be to have a fine salty taste yes because theyre so savage for it in time, and sister all live with him in her about politics and earthquakes and the 8 big poppies because mine was thicker than cows then he wanted to examine a print curiously, as if to encourage them. The best people there are a few brains not like me to step over at the elevation weeks and weeks I kept the highest company and been everywhere, and was determined to blame?

Bulstrode said no more of the matter with my hair like the dickens they call them ideas.

I remember one time I ever heard of such a low fellow, that East Retford was nothing to their navels even when we walk forth happily among them in the tea-table and upset the milk, then, said Mr. Vincy was very nice invention too by the educational mother. I remember when I used to do with it I wonder why they call it that if I were Brooke, said Sir James, not being used to know where were you where are you brooding over so?

Oh, he's a dangerous subject with Mrs.

Pray come too, and he in mourning thats 11 years ago I wish you would insist on my lap now. As for Rosamond, insisted Lydgate, you ply him with all her life after of course he had me always when I knew his tattarrattat at the mutual web. Have you tried him on. I beg your pardon coach I thought it was meeting Josie Powell and the warden marching with his keys to lock the gates, said Dorothea. But Dorothea's effort was too short then the sea anyhow he always takes off his feed thinking of his exposing himself.

That's your hobby, and machine-breaking everywhere, and she too was spinning industriously at the little man he showed me how soon you can believe him I never had thats why he wants and he not long married flirting with a villa and eight rooms her father was an unwonted sign of that everlasting butchers meat from Buckleys loin chops and leg beef and rib steak and scrag of mutton and calfs pluck the very place too we did in this life get into bed till that thunder woke me up no damn fear once I start I tell you I had to halfshut my eyes over things in her about politics they know by the Tolka in my grave I suppose thats how he is what spoils him I feel some wind in me better go easy not wake him have a dreadfully secular mind. I havent forgotten it all now plainly and they bring the voters drunk to the great, imminent discovery. I could have picked every morsel of that kind. He felt sure that she had worms or not still all the horses dung I could certainly hasten the work with a quick movement said almost sharply—Do you mean—That is how families get rid of one life towards another, visions of completeness, indefinite trust. Allow me to feel his mouth O Lord I must stretch myself I wished I could quite easily get him to stop and not think of him;—and yet, with his opera songs and his ready tongue. Are they? I heard burglars in the W C drunk in some pub corner and her black blessed virgin with the opera hats I tasted once with my legs round him and left his plans belated: he was educated: you know—the sort of object-lesson given to indirect modes of expressing himself: when Fred had given out unexpected electricity, and that kind of expression in us through many intricacies of lace-edging and hosiery and petticoat-tucking, in spite of his being a man who wants to read in bed in the coffee she stood there standing when I put my arms around him yes thatd be awfully jolly I suppose never dream of washing it from me and if he was too proud to act as if he were transplanted into plenty: he had to say the property was all thinking of as well throw you out in the kitchen to get a nice fat hand the palm moist always I wouldnt marry him not if he knew she broke off the ship and old captain Groves and father talking about Rorkes drift and Plevna and sir Garnet Wolseley and Gordon at Khartoum lighting their pipes for them to do but the one way—you have allowed all this is about a womans bottom Id throw my hat that old Glasgow suit of yours would never interfere with them why arent all men like that dirty bitch in that family physician I could pose for a penance I wonder is he driving at now showing him my photo its not much doesnt everybody only they hide it with a strong representation how important it was going to take me to show it to some poor child but I told her over him because I didnt get a nice lot all of them. Not that Mr. Casaubon has not said so yet here you are they theyre all right I wouldnt give in with the razor paring his corns afraid hed get regular pay or a loo her face swelled up on her own way at the canal was frozen yes it was easier to object than to hinder any formal communication of an adverse resolve; in the next morning in letting Rosamond know what Mrs. I do know me in the ladies letterwriter when I saw his eyes shut and a little less like an Irish cottier's.

It is Aquinas's fault, said Sir James complied at once what you mean.

Everything was changing its aspect: her husband's injustice. That's a showy sort of thing that he had the oyster knife cant be true a thing like that nowadays full up of each other up; and altogether Lydgate had not taken him by his tenants or any one would have called an ordinary way, very much beloved, but he could buy me a great lot about a landlord not a horse or an ass am I with nothing but my pipe and pond-animalcules.

I spoke from inference only. It must be of a king theyre all right I wouldnt mind being a woman always licking and lecking but I could without too openly they were just beginning to form themselves. He touched her keenly. Paul's Cross after old Latimer. Cadwallader. And it takes me to try some fellow or other inconvenience, purely by the bottle anyway if not I saw through him telling me all the time even that watch he gave me the pan all for masses for herself take that thats alright the one I did with her the one I have a child embarazada that old commode I wonder why he wants to be prepared for in the way thats why I suppose they could I get up under my petticoats especially then still I look young no matter what they please a married woman or a murderer anybody what they did together well naturally and if a man almost easy O how the waters come down at me professor I hope Ill never be like her?

One ought to satisfy him if we hadnt enough of that hardened criminal he was too late now for your impudence she had been lower than she had believed, whose exorbitant claims for himself an old pattern which was probably deficient. Well, Vincy. But now, only because Mr. Casaubon wished it. The eldest understood, and the boats with their skirts blowing up to her mouth water but it will take wing; Brooke will sell the 'Pioneer,and everything you were a nice lot its well for men all their stinks after them always know who he has got a chance in Brighton square running into my muff when I was thinking of him, said Fred, who had risen to look at Fred or not, ought she? We may all be ruined for what I should never have got him to get a high style of embroidery and Valenciennes. It follows as a great lot about a womans bottom Id throw my hat at him that knew us I thought the heavens were coming down on bathingsuits and lownecks of course hes right enough in Santa Maria that gave me the Italian then hell write about some woman in their tail if you got pelted, interposed Mrs. And here is Celia and her husband was one true thing he slept on the whole blessed time till I taught him Cappoquin he came back with the soup but I could easily have slipped a couple of eggs since the City Arms intelligence they had the advantage of those a nice aquamarine Ill stick him for one time well done to him. Farebrother said—Wait here a minute after just to try and steal our things if they only knew him as a woman and he had found it out then to flush it nice cool pins and needles still theres something queer about their children always smelling around those filthy bitches all sides like the dogs do it again if he doesnt correct her faith I will put the quilt on the paucity of time rather than of a romantic comedy. —Miss Noble, the oil-cloth worn, the idea making us like that he had no other fixity than that look how white they are and the moon shining so beautifully coming back on the scene he was, had come at all then Ill tell him the winds that waft my sighs to thee so well as possible how he got all those firm expectations were upset.

It is a nuisance under one's very nose.

It did not know how the waters come down at me with a grand dinner except that Synoptical Tabulation, which no one wished to do it since I was a subject which Mrs. Sir James to follow when he was as flat as a great favour the very highest style of man anywhere to be free from it is easy I think he'll turn him round: I wouldn't talk of the naked street that disheartened me altogether I suppose its all the time with his beard a bit sooner then I hate the mention of her ear and a bottle of hogwash he tried to bite the nipple I had before to keep turning and turning to get in a gate somewhere or one of these was of a manner like he got me on the shelf well Im not a rock: he would give any number of representatives who will pay for it I think while Im asleep then we had together scrumptious currant scones and raspberry wafers I adore well now Miss Tweedy or Miss Gillespie theres the room to show one wet Sunday in the preserved seats for that it meant him but hes no chicken nor a stranger either besides my face the best men, said Mr. Brooke. I forgot that he used to love coming home with a smile in his hand anear me drawers drawers the whole more painful to Mary, imagining now that I got him to tell him I want LI or perhaps the sweety kind of flowers are those they invented like the sea excited me of old Mrs Fleming and drove out to her, and gives him a stinted provision for himself and lock him down into the glooms about that would suit you, then jumped down again and swept half the character a woman and he so English all father left me in the cheeks of my face was turned the other. Why should I sit here idle? Dorothea, breaking in impetuously. There was a sudden strange yearning of heart towards Will Ladislaw thinking about me lover and mistress publicly too with his lips, and tripping away. Why, yes, said Mrs.

He was an exceptional man that common workman that left its hard to believe all I thought I had to stand for him to come and hear him.

And happening the next room hed have one yes when I said I liked him because I was watching me whenever he asked who are not to flinch from. Mr. Vincy. Come, that's capital.

I said to herself to her head with my hair a bit the skin underneath is much finer where it was found out he walks down the fat I told him he said, rising to go away from us. Rosamond, a sort of thing—these men never understand what is he driving at now showing him my photo its not that stuckup university student sort no otherwise he wouldnt pay till he was out of her, if Bulstrode had not taken him by the divine government under each dispensation. It was a bit putting on the black water but that only makes it a wider range than that fixity of alternating impulses sometimes called habit, and an election coming on—Dear papa! I know I am an adulteress as the early frost, and other incidents of scientific inquiry, are observed to be popular and see it all over also his lovely young cock there so simple I wouldnt answer first only looked out over the kitten's head as usual on the black water but it was a potent professor of John Jameson they all whitehot and the wineshops half open at night and the bugs tons of them it was found out on the windowsill before all the ends of the Huguenots to sing the Vicar's praises. Excuse me, it must have given me up no damn fear once I start I tell you I had for pisto madrileno Floey Dillon since she wrote to say, but he's such a home as Wrench had—well, child, we must not think of him as much as I can have music and cigarettes I can get up a row and made him stand there and kiss me in the hope but he has done. Said Lydgate, lifting her eyes with wider gravity at her schoolfellow Miss Willoughby's.

Where am I ever go back there again is a little return on rent-days to help a tenant to buy them of a promise to erect a tomb with his for a moment but I dont know what to make its only like gruel or the Dublins that won and half the rotten eggs would mean hatred of your uncles do you think me very undeserving, Mrs. I can't talk to your soul almost paralyses you then a girl for their seats out of the spoon up and whats this her other name was just like that on my lap now. Mr. Bulstrode be to blame herself and her lot of trash I hate those rich ones off Stephens green running up to to get him to be tied though I wouldnt let him fall into a temper still he hasnt long greasy hair hanging into his eyes were red when his brother-in-law Bulstrode had vexed him, I dare say? But it had a kind of expression in us all of it too, Miss Garth has such very high connections: he is one of those candidates who come from being forbidden to her lately at the grand funeral trousers as if he knew how he is besides something always happens with him, said the Rector.

She was knitting, and led off the street into a consumption, as if to encourage them. In the earlier half of those new some word I couldnt keep it as well be in bed with his for a penance I wonder what shes got like now after living with him that he could, he was shaking like a hatrack no wonder but he does of course it used to be a cheapening of our constitution, while Letty arriving cried out to see rivers and lakes and flowers all a womans body were so dubious to her mouth water but it will not mind if every field on his hand with his knife or theyd have taken it into his soul thats dead I suppose he wont get or its some little bitch or other and Martin Cunningham and the skirt and jacket and the second verse first the old stupid clock to near the Bloomfield laundry to try and make him do it on the other side was reading aloud from that naivete which belonged to preoccupation with favorite ideas. I halfturned and stopped then he said at the back of his exposing himself. —It is seven weeks now since papa gave his consent. Bulstrode, wishing to rouse her husband's places of deposit for private writing, but he's such a born liar too no wonder they treat you like.

He would have done if he knew the items of election expenses I could see that this blooming youngster should flourish on the canal lock my Irish beauty he was on the clean sheet I wouldnt go mad about either or suppose I never thought hed write making an appointment I had before to keep turning and turning to get a high style of embroidery and Valenciennes. And I shall have to make a knot on a visiting card or practising for the 4 years more I have a good eyeful out of her in her trap with Friery the solicitor we werent grand enough till I promised to give me chloroform or God knows its not true and that derelict ship that came along I suppose he died of galloping drink ages ago the days like years not a hair's-breadth beyond—docile, therefore, and slightly meditative; in fact, resumed Sir James? In carrying out this bequest of labor to Dorothea, meditatively. He is a great mirada once or twice first he meant to make people believe that you have to perfume it in the bottom of the bed to know where were you not? Dagley complained to me.

What can I its a wonder she didnt darken the door when he comes up in the morning it must be prepared for the burglars benefit there isnt in all directions if you please that might be wrong about Mary. And that if you had such an idea about him l or 2 tunnels perhaps then you could not speak for you of the kind, which was shown to him who Mrs Fleming and drove out to him. And happening the next lane running round all the nicer then coming back suppose I divorced him Mrs Boylan my mother whoever she is such a house like this Id love to have the violet pair I wore that dress Miss Stack bringing him flowers the worst to the great, imminent discovery.

The certainty that I may win Mary.

Yes, young people are usually blind to everything but their own intention.

And it really is painful for me, papa. Family annoyances. Young love-making not at all hours answer the door when he sprained his foot in it you want to buy them of a bottom Mulvey I wouldnt trust him too far to give all the woodcocks and pigeons screaming coming back the skin much an hour he was educated: you only mean that which takes in the Blessed Virgins arms sure no woman could have wished this beforehand, whatever the Vincys might suppose. But I should be the 1st man Id meet theyre out looking quite conscious what harm but he never can explain a thing like that, said Mary. He is engaged in making scientific discoveries.

When, seating himself on a little indisposed to raise a question if I was coming next only natural weakness it was having a strong desire to rescue him from doing worse where it was on account of her life. She might have taken it into him and all about the parishioners in Tipton. A pretty deal to do nothing: that makes it so now there you are joking.

There was no help for it and invite some other woman I can tell him the other world tying ourselves up God be merciful to us I thought I had some I could always hear his voice talking when the priest and they bring the voters drunk to the highest rock in existence the galleries and casemates and those frightful rocks and Saint Michaels cave with the sashes and the rosegardens and the jessamine and geraniums and cactuses and Gibraltar as if already breathed upon by exquisite wedded affection such as would be more classy O beau pays de la Flora and he said the Rector, lounging back and smiling easily, as if I went into the unpleasant fact about the monuments and he always sang it not? And you see something of that. But it's pleasant to find himself in! Sir James. I wonder what sort is his foremost man. And that money-advances from fathers-in-law; and he wanted to shout out all round the back of the ladies letterwriter when I was in love with the old castle thousands of years old yes and he wanted to touch the lute and transform life into romance at any moment what a row youre making like the Andalusian girls used or shall I wear a white soft living substance to make—you never would marry Mr. Ladislaw from wanting to put his tongue 7 miles up my hole is itching me always when I looked a bit of a body can understand then he asked to take lessons what is good satire.

Mr. Farebrother, but this time know that. Assuredly, said Lydgate. Don't be sad, Dodo—I think I am standing in his gentlest tone, as she likes, he was throwing his hat and stick and rose quickly.

Harriet! He got rid of troublesome sprigs. And as to the lowest pits that sponger he was or did supposed to be passive, is a great leg of and she as insolent as ever for the gold cup hed say its from the London and Newcastle Williams and Woods goes twice as far as ever for the son then the same paying him for one thing I hope that lamp is not martyrdom to pay bills that one drop even if its a wonder Im not no nor anything like that in women no wonder they hide it I was interested having to answer he always said that he said hed have one or two Brooke and this Master Ladislaw will take wing; Brooke will sell the 'Pioneer,or Ladislaw, said Lydgate, having early had much exercise in such a born liar too no hed never turn or let him know if he had been asked to admire the spider, Mr. Casaubon was spiteful.Said the Rector. Every morning now she sat with Celia. Dorothea, meditatively.

Then he said he was black and blue do him all the bits of paper in his grand funeral trousers as if Mr. Casaubon has not left any expression of opinion to which Mr. Vincy, he reopened the subject? Mr. Farebrother and hear him preach. There was no time in conjecturing how much were they Ive no clothes at all hours answer the door much after we were like cousins what age was he was pale with excitement about going away so familiarly in the world let us take a direction that would at least one quarter of the garden at the end would be.

They are every-day things: in spite of experience supposed to represent beauty placed up there for tea 2 days after in the pit at the cleaners 3 whats that for the bit you put down your throat we have to let them get a private tutorship and go about rather gay not too old for him what are his wife I just after my mother he used his mouth singing then he wanted that his notion of being worsted in dialogue with a cord flagellate sure theres nothing like a mummy will I indeed did you ever be up to the harbour Marie the Marie whatyoucallit no he hadnt an idea about him, turned on the leg behind high up was it there was a new attitude, and lunch lingering in the world the mists began I hate those eels cod yes Ill sing Winds that blow from the reading of the night for him to show it to God he had the manners not to go and marry a poor old woman to another I couldnt smell anything off it Im certain the way they do themselves the fine cattle going about that any more when I looked back and smiling, while the grizzled Newfoundland lying in the right reins now pull the chain then to the fair with the cherries which stood in a few pence for them to set up housekeeping, he's mistaken, that's capital. At this crisis Lydgate was a real officers funeral thatd be hot on for flirtyfying too when I half frowned at him first you sometimes love to hear him preach. You are not of this kind, said Sir James. What! A large tear which had been remarking on baby's robes. Casaubon wanted to examine a print curiously, as he gave me the present terms. But Mr. Brooke. Vincy preferred playing was that of course I put him into it. This constancy of purpose in the paper, and she went on, observing nothing more than was good for him in 3 years time theres many a true word spoken in jest there is anything uncomfortable for you in a dim and clogging medium: distrust of any sign that in Horace?

What I care with it what a man who beats me in the 'Pioneer. Satire, you are here, Fred could not possibly have wished that he has got into the tea-table and upset the milk, then jumped down again and her black blessed virgin with the engraving; and he tired me out of her worsted, knitting her brow at it show them attention and they treat you like those babies in the D B C with Poldy laughing and trying to catch my eye as if we had to defend her husband, lost no time the next room hed have heard me on copied from some old Aristocrat or whatever the Vincys might suppose. Garth to manage your papa says he will not like Bartell Darcy sweet tart goodbye of course compared with an air of the mountain yes when I half of the will with some liqueur Id like to see that his notion of being hanged O she didnt look a big brute like that other woman I lent him afterwards with Mulveys photo in it I wonder could I only could remember the I half frowned at him seduce him I was just like a weddingcake standing up miles off my stockings lying on his nose like that all invention made up about he drinking the champagne out of the footlights again Kathleen Kearney and her dog smelling my fur and always the worst to the uncle who was not likely to make you feel that papa should be treated as if to encourage him as hes there they know youve no man could look at that period there was a boycott I hate that pretending of all the time to time, and giving him the satisfaction of giving Fred his discipline and the last of yesterday that made it the two of them for money, and the tall old chap with the soup splashing about taking spoonfuls of it the last year by giving lessons, carrying on hard study at the same place and dont forget it God only knows whether he did not repeat her brother's complaints to her at present occupied; and it would not be right. He does play for money, and we were engaged became general in Middlemarch without the neck is very fond of him.

We should not surmount every other. Mrs. He found the family in a large shawl; and Lydgate thought that would allow us to marry on? Some say it's the end I can see what attention only of his grandfather instead of roving around the city meeting God knows its not true and that Mrs.

It did not repeat her brother's complaints to her one evening, in relation to Rosamond's family.

But the best linen and the sailors playing all birds fly and I take my stand on them hes certainly well off I know they were so plump and tempting in my bed in the handglass powdering a mirror never gives you the expression besides scrooching down on their cheek doing that frigging drawing out the light too so then there were any words written for me I heard burglars in the morning Mamy Dillon used to stoop in that light—that gossamer web! But here was a bit queer to go beyond this salutary general doctrine, and he went out. Said Mr. Brooke, rising, taking up the side of the 'Pioneer. You were not such a home as Wrench had—well, but he might imagine he was, had hardly seen Ladislaw, and you ought to be prettier than memory could represent her to do with it like a prince on the wrong not being in the Aristocrats Masterpiece he brought me that one change them only not to upset myself and write his name upon it. You wanted to and she pretended not to look out of the generous host whom nobody criticises. I ever going to Howth Id like to think rather rigorously of what had been a prime minister: the force of circumstances was easily too much the fashion now garters that much I couldnt find anywhere only for the world to make her mouth water but it will not be an affair of a man looks like with his lamp and try again so as he implied to Mr. Garth seemed pleased that Mary we had Martin Harvey for breakfast dinner and Ben Dollard base barreltone the night I couldnt describe it simply to please him, and preference for armorial bearings in our mutual position; the whole time watching with the heat there before the last of yesterday that made up about he drinking the champagne out of the way it was asking you to sit it out in his wifes mouth damn this stinking thing anyway wheres this and wheres that of course that is Keck—an amorous conspirator, it is sure to rise in society yes wait it all over the other side of me when I was afraid when that other beauty Burke out of that everlasting butchers meat from Buckleys loin chops and leg beef and rib steak and scrag of mutton and calfs pluck the very place too we did it or lump it he thinks nothing can happen without him knowing he hadnt a moustache that was her proof O yes her aunt was very fond of oysters but I stared it out of him if hes anything of this world without style all going in food and rent when I asked him I liked him because I told him about some dean or bishop was sitting beside me in the box I could all in white and lavender like a rose I didnt want to make of me serve him right its all very fine, you know: Hawley and his boiled eyes of all the people passing they all of them knew Dodo as well he doesnt smear all my compriments on your person my child on the chair before me so barefaced without even asking permission and standing out that was all thinking of me to find out was he brought in if they could put him in the most blameless men I suppose well have him I knew the purport of her suggesting me to marry Farebrother at last he made me seasick he didnt like it so as to the harbour Marie the Marie whatyoucallit no he made me the other side of the spoon up and then you have men on your side who will pay for everything at once to pay for everything at once saw the 2 Dedalus girls coming from school I never give up my hole is itching me always at myself 4 and 5 times a day older than then I wouldnt mind feeling it neither would he feel when he found lilies there too where he is indeed judging by the educational mother.

His attendance on Dorothea while her brain was excited, had as little of what went on in her trap with Friery the solicitor we werent all drowned he can scour off the hand off that little Italian boy to mend so that finished that I am not ungrateful; I trust in heaven it won't be broken!

Your whiskers filling her up with a will, said Sir James, said Rosamond, a little girl because I used to weaning her till he was shaking like a new pattern of gate—I hope my breath yes he said he was dying to find everybody, and cast her eyes down meditatively on her it brings a parting and the hotel rrrsssstt awokwokawok his eyes or standing up miles off my drawers and bulge it right out and have nothing more than anybody. But the months gained on him.

We should not see it comes out or Ill see if there was some funny story about the grounds, and he would keep entire silence on a lovely woman O Lord I wanted to marry you for your opinions, but in the porkbutchers is a cursed day too no hed never find another woman like that bath of the name model laundry sending me to put it past him like other women do I so there you are glad that he regarded Fred's idleness with a Molly in them in everybody's mouth in Middlemarch without the least because he used to weaning her till he was lo times worse himself anyhow begging me to say yes till I was jumping up at the bottom of the other side of the banks there on purpose that we went over middle hill round by Coadys lane will give no money to provide furniture; and though, since Mary openly placed Farebrother above everybody, I admit—the doors and windows to make a new city better leave this ring behind want to feel your way with a dirty barefaced liar and sloven like that if any fool wouldnt know what: It is as angry with him that Mr. Vincy, blustering as he sat down to me the fidgets coming in to spoil their sleep except an odd mixture of plum and apple no Ill have to learn the way to Lowick parsonage he had been keeping away from the Grange chiefly as a sheet frightened out of the piano stood, and I love and being expected continually by some one who always do more than any other redactor. Is he really going to be married in a lover's nature—it was going by with the sense of having exceeded in words was peculiarly mortifying. I found in her nature what could she go to Lowick, to make the great archery scene at the Only Way in the best my blouse open for his having come in Id like to try and patch it up like in a way not to ask any questions but they want to do that there was some rage in his slippers to look at baby, things were right enough, and the oysters 2/6 obviating that unsightly broad appearance across the grass with Brownie at his shirt with a more correct outside. There was some rage in his wifes mouth damn this stinking thing anyway wheres this those napkins are ah yes I had youre always in great singing voice no I never heard of wedding-clothes being bought after marriage. Ladislaw; but my pipe and pond-products which he believed me that clumsy Claddagh ring for luck that I shall stay with Christy, opening her eyes rather absently.Humphrey; and only captain Groves and father talking about Spinoza and his son that got to do anything extravagant, but he never saw a better judge than James. And she has nobody to command her as she was not more or less sanctioned by men of ordinary honor.

What? Fred thought it as ridiculous, having early had much exercise in such dismissals.

Caleb likes taking trouble: he would have done with it; and then of his estate. Then you think me stupid if he had omitted to send off from the depths of her in the desks and drawers let him keep it when was it yes rather high up was it to God he had been considerably reduced since he had prepared was subdued only by distrust of Dorothea's nature: she could say distinctly to herself was, had come home. Retrogressive, now! She never did give me what do I care the more because of them. Mrs Rubio brought it on her wasnt she the downright villain to go to bed, I hope shell get someone to dance attendance on Dorothea while her brain was excited, had talked fervidly to Rosamond to be all shot or the freemasons then well see well see well see then let him have him sitting up like that on show on the stage when I sang at where its over a daub of red ink would do something to H H the pope besides theres no danger whatsoever keep yourself calm in his arms theres nothing for a father to get a husband whose thoughts had been asked to take photographs on account of the sudden revelation that another had thought that in her chair, with an ill-chosen domestic apparatus. That Miss Theother lot of squealers Miss This Miss That Miss Theother lot of that for the property was all very fine, you have taken up such an idea about him and Dorothea about the young May moon shes beaming love because he never will he take a decided course, and preference for armorial bearings in our mutual position; the whole insides out of his spunk on the knife for bad luck or if its not that its just the ordinary do it in time, said Mrs. I remember they all look at them I wanted to study up that myself they darent order me about the grounds, and half fearing that she was undergoing a metamorphosis in which his own position was not advantageous, a sort of happiness even than this—being continually together, independent of others, and I saw him that the revelation might do Fred Vincy a great friend of ours; and Fred predicted to himself that he says is so much harm.

It was plainer now than ever that his character as a great big hole in his eye I had to say they give a snap of my foot so much harm. I've had enough of them.

And she has been since I was watching the sun so he must be to the poll. I forgot it to God I wouldnt answer first only looked out over the show on the pop of asking them to set up housekeeping, he's mistaken, that's capital. It's no use at Lowick—I hope he won't go into a volume of sermons by Mr. Tyke has been called in Lloyds Weekly news 20 years if I knew it was impossible for either of them pretending to like it! The result of the ashpit. It seemed a triumphant eluding of his own position was not a rock: he would like to know grey matter they have been said or done. Said wasnt it natural so it is not martyrdom to pay for everything at home then—no teasing with personal speculations—he has kept college company. Come, you know. But mamma was near spoiling all, was made active by the imbittering discovery that in her heart, but really when a husband but you cant do a thing pfooh you wouldnt see women going and marrying him first tickling him I want LI or perhaps 30/-in all sure you were yes I said I was in great style at the little bit of what people should be the manager he gave me the fidgets coming in lovely and fresh who knows the meaning of the nymph with my family. I've taken my resolution, so I took off only my blouse or touch him with my hair like a jelly all over also his lovely young cock there so tender all the time as a girl he was able to think rather rigorously of what she resolved to do the criada the room was crowded and watch him after him at the open air fete that one denying it up in me nice invention too by the handwriting or the freemasons then well see well see then let him go to Will Ladislaw?

But I should think he is one of those high-bred cousins who were bores, should be appealed to in writing.

I was fit to be always and ever wearing the same besides I hate people that have to knock off the hand, I should be true up to him. The best people there are so many years to know I cant help it if anyone asked could he have the two ways I always knew wed go away, and everything has been since I have a good deal of trouble to anybody. Bulstrode has pushed him forward more than he is drawing it down my horses soon.There are tremendous sarcasms against a landlord stands in his gentlest tone, Mr. Farebrother must be given up. If you were a wheelbarrow theyd die down dead off their feet if ever he got anything really serious the matter. The evening that Fred might be wrong about Mary. What original notions you clever men have to wear whoever invented them expecting you to tell her a wallflower that was why we had to be so very distressing.

As to Lydgate himself, having been accepted, he had for pisto madrileno Floey Dillon since she wrote a letter on its way and scandals too the few old rags I have of life up to me.

Christy, opening into a boat with him at Bray telling the boatman he knew the way only a black mans Id like to find out something about poetry in it who gave him all the rock standing up like a river so clear Harry Molly darling I was a poet like lord Byron and not living at home more especially Jack Power keeping that barmaid he does that is wise. But he's getting on right something happens or he might want to I feel I want to get the last person who ought to chuck that Freeman with the fez used to stoop in that didnt he kiss our halldoor yes he did not bribe enough. If anything is done to make everything comfortable about Rosamond's marriage; and the smell of a man theyre not afraid going about of getting Garth to make the great God I dont know and Im to be listened to by a lengthening line of wool, shouted and clapped his hands at the Broadstone going away or wed be seen from the house he felt it was a little filial lecture afterwards, and she never left us a farthing. Garth meant, and he so quiet and mild with his tall hat on the whole place swimming in roses God of heaven theres nothing for a postcard U p up O sweetheart May wouldnt a thing simply the way I used to write to the mark. Here you all are, eh? There is one who was instructed to the highest uses of his like that on my clean shift or powdered myself or a murderer anybody what they can out of the world let us make too much singing a bit putting on the pop of asking them to set up above everybody, you never know consumption or leave me with a jealous dread in his tone. Tell me at once to pay bills that one when I looked close in the eye of my business, and only time we were before she had too on the jealous side whenever he set out at five o'clock and called on Mrs. She ought not, as St.

The certainty that I wouldnt answer first only looked out over the featherbed mountain after the lovely places we could accept any exchange for it.

You were not cheerful, and you ought to have behaved just the right thing that Dorothea was in there on the paucity of time rather than of a few words not those 2 lb pots of mixed plum and apple no Ill have to wash it off on me yes and damn well fucked too up to open it with his point of view considerably changed in relation to many observers besides Mr. Farebrother was somewhere in the drawing-room on to get it out in front of me in the right place was adorable. Miss Vincy and Mr. Farebrother.

Said Dorothea, breaking in impetuously. Will you give it up.

After a slight pause, he observed, when Mr. Farebrother has left us together on purpose that we might speak freely.

Marriage, of course any old rag looks well on you then a girl in spite of experience supposed to be married soon.

On the contrary, he said he was years older than me I tell you, to make, ended the Rector, laughingly, that Mr. Farebrother that I could always hear his voice talking when the day well soon have the whole thing and one of these was of a philanthropist is likely to be a cheapening of our constitution, while he looked Poldy pigheaded as usual like the night he walked home with a strong effect on him at Bray telling the boatman he knew how to row if anyone asked could he have the violet pair I wore that dress Miss Stack bringing him flowers the worst I know—the county. Mrs. He did not wish for the smell of scorching.

I think he'll turn him round: I wouldn't talk of phlebotomy, I think Ill get a wink of sleep it wouldnt have made us the fish supper on account of their bad conscience ah yes I pulled him off letting on I want to make the great Suggester Don Poldo de la Flora if he wrote it I wonder whether he wishes he could twist how he is the name of a place like that he should be glad.

Does he know you are behaving very ill, Fred could not help feeling that he remained silent and went to India? Said Mrs. What!

What has he not long married flirting with a bit foolish in the City Arms hotel when he stood up and down the paper as if he knew she was a good time somewhere still she must have altogether begun with an intelligent welleducated person Id have to knock the good baronet, feeling that he had too on the landing always somebody inside praying then leaving all their learning why dont they go howling for the gold cup hed say or do something quite beneath him, even with men, said Mary, retreating, and the castanets and the four paltry handkerchiefs about 6/-in-law, or prospective income from a heap of shallow cabinet drawers, in which his own love as probably evident enough. He hopes soon to be a university professor of Italian and Im to be a little backward, I shall stay with Christy, opening his arms theres nothing else its all his other expectations; he wants what he never knew how to settle it at once. She now said with the fine gentlemen in their hats and the mosquito nets I couldnt find anywhere only for the priest was going by with the one like a sausage or something where hed no business they can out of it before I tore it up in us all go and wash the cobbles off themselves first then they come out please shes in great humour she said one day to accompany a patient to Brassing, he told me point-blank that clergymen seldom understood anything about business, said Dorothea, breaking in impetuously. Just what Rosy ought to go and see if they send up a pretty strong party.

He touched her ear because her bumgut fell out a fine hack, and ordering our lives as we know, said Lydgate.

Trieste-Zurich-Paris 1914—1921

Santa Barbara 2015—2018

#Ulysses (novel)#James Joyce #1922 #automatically generated text #Patrick Mooney #Penelope #George Eliot #Victorian novels #British novelists #Bildungsromaener #didactic literature #Marian Evans #19th century #Middlemarch (novel)

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okimargarvez · 4 years

Text

ANOTHER SIDE OF THE STORY

Original title: L’altra versione della storia (Lisa).

Prompt: Penelope faints and Lisa understands something very important.

Warning: none.

Genre: sad, drama.

Characters: Lisa Douglas, Penelope Garcia, Luke Alvez, BAU team.

Pairing: Garvez, LukexLisa, Willifer, Prendoza, RossixKrystall.

Note: oneshot 56 in Garvez collection.

Legend: 💏🔦.

Song mentioned: Angelo mio, Tiziano Ferro.

GARVEZ STORIES

Note: I had to write this. There are two reason for make Luke and Lisa break up: garvez; and Lisa, because she will suffer staying with a man that doesn’t love her as everyone deserve.

ANOTHER SIDE OF THE STORY

The priest pronounces the fateful sentence. No, not "do you ... take ... to be your wife", but: -So if any person here has just cause as to...- and of course no one breaths, but before the celebrant can continue, a thud is heard coming from the right side of the church , precisely from the second row of the nave. A noise like a dead body falling to the ground, and indeed, it is something similar.

-Garcia!- someone shouts, in the general confusion, someone else is still too shocked to react. Her best friend leans over her, quickly followed by the man beside her, who feels her pulse. But a third reaches them, running like crazy from the altar to the bench. Someone else, meanwhile, has called an ambulance.

He stays with his mouth wide open for about half a second, then comes back to life. -What happened?- he asks his friends and colleagues, looking at them one by one, as if they knew the answer. -Penelope, por Dios, what happened? Why doesn't she get up?- at a single thought he doesn’t allow to go outside, develop and become stronger, real. A thin hand the same color as his skin settles on his arm.

-Luke, honey, let me pass.- he looks at his girlfriend with a blank expression. -I'm a Doctor, remember?- she says in a calm tone, recognizing his state of agitation and realizing that they risk finding themselves two people fainted. -In this case I have more skills than you.- Luke seems to absorb her sentences and finally moves away. He watches her work diligently, through a misted glass... no, it's his eyes, shiny.

Penelope never regains consciousness and the paramedics enter the church with a stretcher. The whole group follows them, someone only with their eyes, another ones, like the entire BAU, also physically. Luke joins his girlfriend, intent on explaining the data she has collected so far. She is professional, attentive, precise and earns five points on everyone's scale of appreciation. Matt tries to stop his friend by taking his by wrist, but the attempt fails. He exchanges a silent look with JJ, who is too worried about Garcia and prefers to take refuge in her husband's arms.

-JJ, love, everything will be fine. You know that's what she'd tell you.- but the woman tightens him harder without answering.

Outside, Penelope is loaded into the ambulance. With one foot practically already on board, Luke asks: -Can I come with you?- the despair in his eyes makes him look more like a colleague.

-Is she your girlfriend?- in fact a paramedic asks, while the others continue the procedure. The same hand as before caresses his arm in a comfortable, almost friendly, way.

-No, it's… my best friend.- he has exaggerated a little, because they never discussed it with each other, but in fact for him Penelope plays that role. He never had a similar relationship with a woman before he met her. And he absolutely needs to be with her, he can't let her go alone and she doesn't have a boyfriend and Morgan isn't here and...

-Let him go.- Lisa intervenes, pushing him forward, so the paramedics are finally convinced. The doors are closed and the ambulance goes away, illuminating the evening, spreading that sound that has always been the bearer of disastrous news, but which is also part of the background of the thing that she loves most to do in the world: to help others, concretely. Lisa looks at the ambulance until it becomes an almost indistinguishable blue and red flashing dot, watching her man walk away with another woman, and sighs. She feels a little emptier.

* You told me, that if you are here, it is not because you are mine but because it is in this way, that you will fulfill the will of your God, my angel

On board the ambulance Luke is almost breathless, so as not to hinder the work that takes place around Garcia. He just thinks.

Her glasses are broken, her glasses. How will can she see us when she wakes up? But maybe I should have the courage to ask the real question, will she wake up? And if... no. I can't accept it. Oh, Penelope, you are too perfect for this world, surely, we poor mortals don’t deserve you, but deign you to keep us company for a little while, yet. I don't care if, looking at a meadow, we are naturally more inclined to pick the most beautiful and particular flowers... it is not yet her moment. No way. I won't let you. Not today, then.

He realizes he has something in his hands and recognizes a woman's purse. Someone must have given it to him before he went up. She has another pair of glasses in here. I know. I know because I'm really her best friend. Who says you can only have one? I don't love Matt like I loved… shit, wrong thought.

Fortunately, the hospital is not far away. It is tradition that the bride chooses the church, at least in the Catholic rite. And this is where Lisa attends when she has shifts that allow her to go to mass.

They arrive at the hospital with an emergency room near, they go down, he too, therefore, in the most classic of clichés, they make him understand in a direct and abrupt way that he can no longer follow them. Less than a minute later, in the waiting room, he hears a loud shouting and understands that the team has also arrived. Lisa cannot participate, but she knows the doctor on duty and reassures him about his preparation and skills. -Penelope is in good hands. Luke, did you hear me?- she takes his face in her hands, caresses it, finally hugs him and while his body against hers is shaken by silent sobs (because he's not actually crying) something else inside her dies.

** If you think I won't survive, call me, I'll follow you!

She opens her eyes and sees nothing, at first. Interminable seconds pass in which she is convinced that she has become blind. She doesn't remember much about what happened before: only that she was in church, between JJ and Spencer, and the priest was saying something solemn... then the total darkness. But she has a strange, terrible feeling. A premonition. The last time she had one... better not think about it. Gradually, however, she begins to see something. Stains of various colors, especially white. Her eyes cause her pain, so her eyelids, heavy as boulders, fall back. But, after a few minutes, she tries again. This time she can make out a little more, just shapes that are enough to make her understand where she is. A hospital room, where light colors dominate. But there is an extra spot, dark, pink, brown and... green, yes. And it's getting closer to her.

-No... it can't be him. I'll be... I'll definitely be dreaming. Why should he be here and not the others? Why a dream so cruel?- she mumbles, convinced that she is only thinking those words. But because of the mask she still wears and the condition of her entire vocal apparatus, her words are confused and almost inaudible to her guest.

-Penelope!- she hears, with a joyful tone, an irrepressible happiness, as if he had won the lottery. And her mind is really diabolical, because it reproduces the masculine tone in all nuances. Do I have auditory hallucinations? How will it be? I would need Reid... -Penelope, gracias a Dios, you woke up!- now it's right next to her bedside and even without glasses, she recognizes its features. He must have caught her agitation, because he hastens to continue. -No, be calm, now I'll give you your glasses.- he bends down and opens the first drawer of the bedside table. For him it has become the object of hope. -Wait.- he tries to position them as best he can on her nose, in a delicate and thoughtful way, exactly like his expression while watching her regain confidence with this artifact. -Hey, no, you have to keep that, you don't need to say anything. You just have to rest.- he prevents her from taking off the mask, but Penelope catches the movement of his arm and blocks him, with the little strength she has, before she plays to warn someone. Her eyes speak, they are like screens on which words are projected, but for security he hands her a white block, which he carries with him from who knows how many years and has never used to take notes on a case, and a pen. With difficulty the woman traces some signs, then turns it towards him. You're real? The man smiles and runs his tongue over his lips inside his mouth. -Yes, I'm here, I'm really here.- he almost adds what's strange about it. She takes the block again and writes again. Tell me the truth. How long? Have you and Lisa already get married? Have I lost it? I'm sorry. He giggles because even writing she can ramble and easily he imagines her tone say those short sentences one after the other. -No, we haven't married yet. We would never have done it without you.- but I don't know if I will, actually. He ignores his own thought. -Two weeks.- then he adds. Penelope seems to breathe a sigh of relief: two weeks is a lot, but not as much as she feared. Where are the others? -We all did shifts. Tara is down at the bar and Emily has just written to me that she is coming.- what he doesn’t tell her is that he has practically always been present, except for going to the bathroom, that he has lived in the hospital, essentially, taking advantage of the knowledge of Lisa. -You have nothing to apologize for, okay?- he tries to convince her. She doesn't say anything, so her eyes seem to cross beyond his and go over his shoulders.

-Luke, go get something, you can't skip lunch.- the brunette woman doesn't seem willing to accept objections. -I'll stay with her, quiet.- in spite of himself, he is forced to obey, but on his way out he takes a last look at his friend. -Penelope, it's so nice to have you back with us.- she says, and the blonde feels all her sincerity in the air. She tries to sketch a smile, but something (tiredness, sleep, drugs, the numbness of the muscles in general) makes everything extremely complex. -I'd give you a hug, if I would sure I would not hurt you.- Penelope reaches out and Lisa notices the block. She hands it to her. We’ll do it later. She manages to get out of her a genuine laugh, full of all the tension of the last two weeks, and of the thoughts she has developed, both at home and during breaks from work. Then the other adds something. I'm sorry I ruined your marriage. I'm so sorry! She hasn’t known her for a very long time, less than two years, but it was not difficult to frame her, even though she is not a profiler like her (theoretically) boyfriend: it is pre-cisely the reaction that she should had expected. -No one thinks this, Penelope, less of all me! Believe me.- she is more persuasive than Luke. -And anyway, it was not the real ceremony, it was just general rehearsal.- this seems to calm her. -Now you have to rest, the others will still be here, when you open your eyes.- she lays her hand on hers and the blonde just nods, before falling asleep.

That's how Luke finds them, when he comes back. Why, though, for one of the two he feels like a punch in the stomach, and for the other the purest of affections? And Lisa is aware of it. But she doesn't say anything, continuing to lose pieces along the road of resignation.

*** I've never had remorse, love, and so you go away

Since Penelope woke up, they managed to convince him (oblige him) to go home and lead a more or less ordinary life. But something has changed between them. Not that they spoke much before, alone; not that at the beginning, they risked arriving late for an appointment because they were too lost on the lips of the other. They are both too loyal to the duty for this to happen. And Luke never (almost never) really let go himself with her. Even marriage was simply a natural step, what the world expected and was to be done. There was no declaration of love on his knees. He never did anything more than what a boyfriend should do, and often not even that. She had complained, months ago, with Phil, in a playful and light way because in the end she understood how Luke was and that it would certainly not have been easy, staying with him. Wasn't this part of his charm?

Luke is not in love with her, it's so obvious. Why did she want to convince herself of the contrary, why she wanted to believe that wearing wedding rings would have made different? But she already knows the answer. Because I do, unlike him, I do. I am in love with him, I love him, and at the thought of losing him... I can’t breathe, and I will also be a doctor, but I have no elucidation that is purely scientific to explain what I feel.

How much had she had to insist on getting to know the team, his friends? It was as if... no, he certainly wasn't ashamed of her. But he didn't want to mix the two worlds. He didn't think it important. And this hurt her. She had thought of it every day. Then, finally, she had made an improvisation from O'Keefe, and she had met them. Everything was going great, they were so nice, and Garcia had done everything she could to put her at ease, for example by making fun of Luke, telling him if he was aware of how lucky he was, that he should dealt with her, if he had dared to break "the heart of this graceful creature". Lisa smiles, hearing again in her mind the voice of the blonde saying that bizarre phrase. Almost everything she said was so weird, yet so frankly sincere, and the way she looked at her... it was impossible not to believe her.

But, although she was already in love, it was not so naive. Surely the people concerned were unaware of it, but she had noticed it, the way those two looked at each other, with her in the middle, at the center of the discussion. The way they provoked themselves, even Luke, not only Penelope, no, she certainly could not let him alone. That grimace that he never did with her; that malice, that light in the eyes. And Garcia? She could hold herself a little longer, but not so much. Even their bodies, regardless of their minds, sought each other, only to repent and turn back, but the attraction started again and so on... But she told herself the story of "it was just a harmless game between friends". Luke hadn't told her (one of the few things) that Penelope had a similar relationship with the agent he had taken the place and that she had made the queen of ice for a while with him, and even now, sometimes, she keeps treat him in this way? And Derek Morgan was married, with a child. So, everything is good.

The exact opposite.

How many times a day, when she was at home, did Luke says her name? How many times had she heard him sing the praises of the BAU oracle? And that story about Phil (it still hurts to think about his name), why didn't he want them to know each other, at least try to date? For months she had observed him rejecting proposals, of any kind, even a four-way appointment ("So you can keep an eye on me and you'll convince yourself that I'm not going to hurt her," he said, because even Phil, she only understands now, had noticed); then, on a Sunday evening, she had met Garcia, both alone, outside a supermarket. And so, she realized that the blonde also felt something for Phil; she had been on the verge of telling her the truth, but in the end, she had thought it could be like betraying Luke. What a serious mistake!

How many times has Luke told her first that he loves her? She can't even remember a single one. And how many times he looks for her closeness first, leaving out when he comes back from a bad case?

She has everything there, lined up in front of her. As Luke's colleagues would say, she can track the profile. She can't stay with him only because she feels bad about taking her things back (isn't it a further sign that they didn't really mix with his? Has she ever really felt at home, here, or more like a kind of strange guest?). She cannot stay only because she loves him. She cannot remain only in order not to have to explain to everyone the reason for another failure. She cannot stay only because she is afraid of being alone. She cannot stay with Luke only because she is one hundred percent certain that he will never have the courage to leave her and go to Penelope.

But she cannot even remain in a situation that will certainly lead her to eternal unhappiness and to develop some psychosomatic illness. She deserves better. She deserves a man who loves her, who looks at her as Luke, again, looks at Penelope. Someone who is all shaken at the idea of seeing her after three days away, someone who makes her arrive late to work, someone with whom to quarrel (one doesn’t argue, if there is no passion). Someone who can make her really happy and who she can make happy. Someone who doesn’t force her to scrape together fragments of affection with which to carry on for a month.

That's enough. She must talk to him. She has decided.

**** I hold the time to keep you here, and I tremble inside and now just a few minutes... and then I'll really have to say goodbye, my angel ...

-Luke. We need to talk.- it sounds too cold, but she can't help it. It is certainly not easy what she is going to do, and she cannot waste time checking that every detail goes well. And above all, she can't cry. She absolutely must not cry in front of him. She doesn’t want tenderness or affection, it is not enough, not anymore. They may be friends, perhaps, after many years. Of course, she will take more than him to recover from the end of this story. He is wearing a sweaty shirt and short sports shorts. He just returned from a run with Roxy. Is Sunday. No cases, no unknown subjects. No shifts, no patients. He doesn't seem worried, not excessively, as he approaches, not too much, anyway. Does he already understand that? Does he expect it? Why leave all the weight on her shoulders, then? -Luke, I...- she falters, and it's not good. She can't even look him in the eye, she feels like stroking him, hugging him and continuing to tell lies; she cannot look at him and is forced to do so, to stop suffering. This brings to her mind a dislocated shoulder: a tremendous pain that ceases to exist only after another pain. -Luke, I'm not happy.- she has said it. She has said one of the most difficult phrases of our time, especially after the eighteenth century, and then in the nineteenth century, when men became convinced that they had reached the height of wellbeing. The belle epoque, she still remembers from school. Positivism, enlightenment... It is forbidden to express your discontent except to get likes and followers on social media. Finally, a reaction: Luke opens his eyes wide, struck by her words, but then that look returns; he already knew. Surely, she was not the only one living in a lie.

-I'm sorry.- he says only, but it's already something. He doesn't look for her, though. He doesn't try to hug her; he doesn't even try. Lisa's lips turn white as she tightens them.

-I know.- she whispers, her voice is missing. -I know you aren't too.- she must hurry up, she will not be able to say everything she has imagined while she was waiting for him, the clock is ticking, she is about to break, die... she who is so tough, who survived to so many bad things... -A different day, I asked you a reason to stay.- she remembers it. She knows he feels sincere affection for her. But they've been together for a year and a half. -Today no.- she lowers her eyes. No, no tears.

-Lisa, I...- she lets him talk, but he has nothing else to add.

-I won't tell you the problem is you, or me. We are the problem together. The problem... the question, let's say... is that...- it is so difficult to say, she seems to play a part, and in fact it is so: only by getting away from what she is doing, she can be able to do it. As with some really difficult exams that she has passed brilliantly. -It doesn’t work. I'm not going to list all the reasons. It would be useless and... I can't...- she leans forward, she's out of breath. But she quickly regains control of herself. She is not the damsel in distress that the dark man hunter can rescue. She is the heroine of her story. -Just this: I'm not happy, neither are you. I tried, really. But it is useless and every day that passes, it is worse than the previous one.- ok, there is a bit of shine in her eyes.

-God, I'm sorry, Lisa, I've tried too, I don't know if you'll believe me...- and Luke is sad too. He loves her. As a friend. It is she who takes his hand, and curses herself, in part.

-I believe you. But it doesn’t work. Something is missing... and it cannot be invented. I hoped that with time things would change... but now I don't believe it anymore.- he returns the hold and she fully enjoys it, knowing that it will be the last time.

-I like being with you, but...- that "but" it shouldn't exist. But it exists. That's all. No need to blame him, Penelope, or herself. No one acted with malice. Things just happened. As much as she loves him, he is not the man of her life. She is certain that this rational phase will last only until she will be alone again.

-I know. I understood. It took me a while... to open my eyes. Fortunately, before we could even be in a worse situation.- she grazes the ring finger of the left hand. She knows why she allowed the history of marriage to go on: because neither she nor Luke are people who would consider divorce, not for their problems.

-Yes.- he only answers.

-I'm just sorry that Penelope has got to faint to get there.- a jump, not too strong, but she sense it anyway. A bitter, melancholy smile. -I hope we can stay on good terms...- she can't tell him that she loves him, she doesn't have to give him any excuse to continue this impasse -because I don't feel any grudge against you. I don’t hate you. I could never be able to do it.- she lets go his hand. Luke strokes her cheek, but there are no tears on her face. They are all sealed inside her and waiting for their moment. Soon.

-Of course, I... I would too... I don't want to lose you. I love you very much.- she doesn't know how, she manages to smile at him. -You can stay here until you need it... until you decide how you feel about it.- Lisa nods.

-Thanks. I'd rather stay alone...- she takes a step back.

-Yes, I understand.- he does the same. But she still has one thing to say. She has long pondered this part. But Luke needs someone to tell him the unvarnished truth, otherwise he could repeat the same mistakes with another woman.

-Wait up. I have to tell you another thing... it's not really my business, but... I don't know how to say it and I'm sorry if I seem to... it doesn't matter.- now yes, he is really terrified, as he should have been when she told him they had to talk, if he was been in love with her. -You must have the courage to be honest with yourself, Luke.- her tone is sweet, but sad. - You need too to open your eyes, get in the game. You're a profiler, for heaven's sake.- yet he doesn't seem to understand or maybe he just pretends, because it's easier that way. -Penelope.- then she only adds, because she cannot say out loud that his now ex-boyfriend is in love with another woman. She is not a robot. And she runs away out from the door, without giving him time to deny.

***** post-scriptum: I have no words to tell you more, but I tremble inside and now you know it too

A year or more has passed since the last time she heard that laugh, but she immediately recognizes it amidst the confusion of the crowd. She is talking on the phone and gesturing with her free hand. -I told you, you didn't have to eat so many of them! Luke? What? I want to see if you have the courage to repeat it to me when I’ll be in front of you.- a pause, while she is grabbing a box and putting it back on the shelf, opting for another. -Yes... me too.- she turns to her, but she hasn't noticed her yet. She smiles, her eyes half-closed. This is the best description of love. And she imagines that the man on the other end of the line is more or less in the same state; but she doesn't want to think about it too much. It's still a little bit bad, it was hard, but she's coming out. She is genuinely happy for her, for them. Even if Luke didn't tell her anything, the few times they have met. Unfortunately, even the best intentions often go to hell. Or maybe he did it to protect her, to not make her suffer by telling her about the joy he was experiencing in being with the woman he loved. But Lisa has her sources and the news has come to her anyway. Of course, hearing about it and seeing it…

Penelope looks up and sees her. There is a moment of faintness. Will not she believe that Lisa hate her? -Hello.- Lisa says, going to meet her, in a warm and calm tone. It doesn't seem to be enough.

-Hello...- the blonde replies, uncertain. Before she can begin to ramble to apologize, she anticipates her.

-How are you? It's been a while since we've seen each other.- Penelope nods and picks up her cell phone in her bag, not even it was the principal piece of evidence in a murder trial. Lisa continues to smile at her.

-I... I’m good ...- now she is wondering if she knows and if she should inform her and, in this case, how. -And you?- but her question is not only of for the circumstance, it is not courtesy. She really cares to know if she's okay. She imagines them (even if she doesn't want to), those two at the moment of truth: he, that told her that she had left him, she who insulted him and made proposals to put things right and then... better not go further.

-Me too. I'm getting to know a man, nothing serious for now, but it gives me good vibes.- it's not a lie to make her feel less guilty. It's the truth. She would never dare to lie to such a pure person as Garcia. Then she decides to throw herself. -Luke didn't tell you?- a jump, the same as her ex the last time she mentioned her.

-Lu ... no.- she stops before naming him, but her eyes are smiling. They shine. -I'm... I'm really happy for you. You deserve it.- Lisa takes a step in her direction and shakes her hand.

-You too, Pen. We all deserve happiness and love...- the other woman nods, agreeing.

-Yes, I always thought that... love is that thing that I would wish even on my worst enemy.- then she hastens to continue, before Lisa can misunderstand. -But I don’t mean you’re my enemy! I didn't...- the brunette reassures her.

-I know, and tell also Luke.- almost a wink. -It was the right thing to do. And I'm fine.- and now she believes it. She really believes it.

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