#cross cooks lotr

[kcrossvine-art]

G'morning all! Its nice to get back things,. Theres been some roadblocks with med shortages and life, and also with the material for these recipes. So far we've covered a lot of pastries, not because theyre mentioned more often in the series, but because being mentioned lends them more specificity in flavor than things like gravy, peas, or various meats. The latter can be prepped, seasoned, and served in so many different ways that it feels harder to make them 'faithfully' because a packet of instant potato mash is just as faithful as a pot of buttered potato mash. Baked goods tend towards 1, maybe 2, 'base' recipes that get altered and added to. 

 Today, we'll be making Beorn's Honey Cakes! A dish from one of my partners favorite characters- a delectable little treat befitting the… warm personality of the character.

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to Beorn's Honey Cakes?” YOU MIGHT ASKSimple stuff! Simple sweet stuff!

All-purpose flour

Baking powder

Salt

Ground nutmeg

Unsalted butter

Whole milk

2 eggs

Honey

Vanilla extract

The veins of honey cakes ancestry can be traced back to any moment where people began baking bread. Honey is a natural preservative, and sweeter still on its lonesome.

AND, “what does Beorn's Honey Cakes taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASKLike your aching muscles repairing themselves

Tastes like a honey graham cracker

But the texture is softer, wetter- somewhat like banana bread

Oh, and this will make your house smell So So Good

If you can resist the temptation of eating them immediately, they taste even richer the day after baking

Would pair well with milk green tea

Would also pair well with fresh orange slices (or those chocolate 'orange slices' candy)

Genuinely don't forget to flip them upside down when they go to bake the second time, not sure what it is but i was curious and did a test where i flipped half of the batch upside down and kept the other half of the batch right-side up like they cooked in the muffin tin. The ones i flipped upside down universally had a more consistent texture and the honey was able to permeate further.

.where honey called for, used clover honey

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From start to finish this recipe takes about an hour of work, give or take some negligible time for prep.

The batter is perhaps the babybird of all cake batters. The gloopy, protruding crumbs of butter, not unlike a squabs beady pupils visibly dark under its skin, break up the mass of sickly smooth and reassuringly sweet-smelling oak-colored liquid. You can feel the confusion of bees outside your home, wondering if this your attempt at making royal jelly.

Just like a babybird, it becomes more than the sum of its parts. Layer on that honey drizzle, layer it on thick, theres no risk of drowning subtle flavors. Its crisp edges will keep its form, springy and warm, inviting you as if you're not the one who crafted it (food you didn't cook always tastes better). The bees are sooooooooooooooo jealous of your opposable thumbs and muscular strength.

If you dont have eggs you could try substituting with apple mash. I can't vouch for it in this recipe but replacing eggs with mashed up apples for pancakes gives it adds a nice fruity flavor without changing the texture, and in theory should work here as well.

I give this recipe a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) 

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

270 grams all-purpose flour

1 1/2 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp salt

1/4 tsp freshly ground nutmeg

1 stick unsalted butter

160 grams milk

2 eggs

110 grams your favorite honey

1 tsp vanilla extract

Muffin tray and parchment paper

Method:

Preheat oven to 350f

In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, salt, and nutmeg.

 Add the butter and rub it into the flour with your fingers until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. 

In a small bowl beat the eggs until just combined. Pour in milk and then vanilla extract while stirring.  Keep stirring vigorously while slowly pouring in honey.

Stir until the mixture is consistent in color.

Pour the liquids over the dry mixture and stir until just combined.

Pour the batter into a greased muffin tray, don't use any muffin paper/lining/cups.

Bake for 16 minutes, or until they reach their full height.

Carefully remove from the muffin pan and place the muffins upside down on a parchment lined tray.

Using a silicone pastry brush, generously cover the tops of the cakes with honey. Allow to sit for about 5 minutes to let the honey soak into the cakes.

Bake for an additional 8-10 minutes, or until the cakes are golden brown.

Remove from the oven and allow to cool.

#cross cooks lotr #tolkein #the hobbit #food recipe

[worldfullofash]

Eddie Munson as your boyfriend

Just look at this silly little guy^

Being his S/O definitely wouldn’t be boring

He will wake you up at 2am to get some burgers cause he’s hungry

You are often at his band rehearsals. Gareth, Jeff and the other guy (who deserves a damn name!!!!) like you because Eddie goes easy on them when you are around

^^ This also applies to dnd campaigns

Eddie WILL be offended when you dislike/never read The Lord of the Rings. It would be his only mission in life to make you fully experience the beautiful masterpieces of Tolkien (Can you tell i love Lotr??)

He will keep making Lotr references till the day he dies (uhm- well.. nvm). But if you refer to it??? He gets weak in the knees. This man is whipped for you

Random staring contests

Eddie would try his best for you. He wants you to feel more than happy in this relationship.

He would read those magazines with shitty relationship advise. So he can be the ‘perfect bf.’ Deep down he knows that not every person loves the same stuff but he wants to impress you

He saves his money to buy you that one thing you really wanted

This guy is a hopeless romantic at heart

Imagine him trying to be romantic by making you breakfast, but getting distracted by some bird outside the window and messing up. You wake up to a guilty looking Eddie with two plates of burned pancakes in his hands

I do think Eddie can cook. He learned because his father never bothered to cook for him after his mother died and Wayne is not always home for dinner. He’s not some culinary chef, but he knows the basics. He just gets distracted easily ^

If you draw something on his arm, don’t be surprised when he gets it tattooed the next day. “Your art should be eternal, babe” would be his response if you question his sanity-

Eddie loves to talk about the things he’s passionate about. His thoughts race through his mind so fast his mouth can't keep up.

If you ask him about his dnd campaign?? You better be ready for hours of rambling (only if he’s 100% comfortable with you. He doesn’t want you to judge him..)

Cause he can feel a little insecure sometimes. He wants reassurance but is too scared to ask for it. Of course you are always there to tell him he’s enough

Eddie isn’t always good with expressing his feelings. He was never taught how to. Because of this you have had quite a few arguments. So to prevent this; he writes letters for you to read. This way he can take his time processing his emotions. The letters contain his messy handwriting only you can read and many crossed out words

#stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson hc #eddie munson headcanons #eddie munson thoughts #eddie munson x gn!reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson fluff

[fili-urzudel]

yo I've never requested something from anyone before, so I hope I'm doing it right, but I would love a sam x reader with forehead touches and palm kisses (and if you wanna do the handhold thumb rub thing too that'd be cool) if you don't want to than that's totally fine.

2. Palm kisses

9. Forehead touches

And handholding but make it Special

You're doing fine with the request! Sam is so cute, he's definitely my favorite all-around LotR character (though it's very difficult to choose) and I just want to always put him in the best, brightest domestic little situations after everything he's been through.

also I totally was not inspired to write this because I'm home sick and also a baby

Warnings: Fever, sickness, not feeling hungry, Samwise Gamgee is Middle Earth's #1 Husband

Word Count: 0.4k

Care - Samwise Gamgee x Reader

Sam moved the pot off the burner, ladling a small bowl full of his mum's soup as quietly as he could. You were probably still sleeping. But it had been hours—you needed to eat, if you could get anything down. 

He crossed the creaking floorboards with as much grace as he could muster, setting the bowl on the sitting room table. You were laid out on the sofa, where you were more comfortable and he could keep an eye on you. He watched you for a moment before he woke you, frowning when your body was wracked with another shiver. He placed the back of his hand against your forehead, which woke you up.

"Fever?" You asked through half-lidded eyes and a dry mouth, as though your sweaty palms and aching body weren't answers enough for you.

"I am afraid you still have a fever, yes," your sweet hobbit answered sympathetically. "I'm not sure if it's gotten much better since this morning."

"I don't think so," you confirmed his hypothesis. Suddenly too warm, you removed your arms from beneath the blanket. Sam wasted no time in taking one of your hands in his own.

"You'll get better soon, dear, I promise," he said seriously, and whenever Sam promised something, you always believed it. He rubbed his thumb comfortingly over the back of your hand, and despite every nerve being rather uncomfortably aflame, it was quite soothing. He had that effect on you. "Are you hungry?"

You smiled weakly. That was yet another thing you loved about Samwise Gamgee—when in doubt, he always helped by cooking. "Not really," you admitted. 

"Can you try to eat something, at least," he requested sweetly, and you knew you couldn't say no. "It might make you feel better," he offered, resting his other hand on your cheek. "It'll make me feel better," he admitted, and you chuckled, leaning into his touch.

"Mm, for you, I suppose I could try," you mused, turning slightly to press a light kiss to his palm. You then gasped. "Oh no!"

"What?" His brow furrowed. 

"I'm going to get you sick! I just thought of that, you've been tending to me all day, and, oh, no, you're going to get sick now," you despaired.

"Don't worry about me, love," he reassured you. "That's what husbands do." He leaned forward, pressing his forehead to yours. "I'd get sick over and over again if it meant I could take care of you."

#lotr fanfic #lotr #lotr fandom #lotr headcanons #samwise gamgee x reader #lotr x reader #samwise x reader #samwise gamgee #samwise gamgee is the best #sam gamgee #sam gamgee x reader #my work #samwise gamgee husband

[kylobith]

LotR Week - Day 7 (17th Dec) - Happy 20th anniversary to The Return of the King!

free prompt

Word count: 2,155

Like every year, it is movie night and everybody participates in one way or another.

Sam busies himself in the kitchen, wearing his apron over his clothes, tidying up while his stew cooks on the stove so there would be little clutter left to clean up once the evening has been enjoyed. Éowyn offered her help but was kindly distracted by Aragorn and Faramir at once, who suggested that she prepare the plates of snacks instead. So, happy to be included anyway, she stands at the little table set up in the corner of the kitchen and lays out cubes of cheese and other finger food on several plates, planting little sword-shaped picks into them so nobody would pick the food with their own fingers. Blissfully captivated by her task, a wide grin upon her face, she ignores the hidden high-five that her husband and the man she once thought she loved share in her back.

Counting the seats to ensure that everybody has the perfect and comfortable spot for them, Frodo clicks his tongue and rearranges some of the chairs. As Merry crosses the room to bring clean hand towels for the bathroom, he halts him and asks him to bring another chair from the library once he is done hanging the towels beside the sink.

Standing atop a stepladder — although she hardly needs it — Arwen hangs fairy lights above the windows, asking Pippin whether they are straight enough before taping them, with the Hobbit cutting off strips and handing them to her. Once every window is ornamented, she climbs down the ladder and folds it, letting Pippin carry it back to the closet in the corridor. Then, she hastens to put candles in their holders all over the place for the perfect atmosphere.

Sitting on the only rocking chair they could put their hands on, Gandalf smokes his pipe with a wide grin. Everybody agreed that he should sit down and enjoy his night, and he planned to do exactly that. He observes the lively house buzzing with activity with a smile, content to see everyone working together to make this movie night unforgettable, as always. While Aragorn brings the plates over to the table once Éowyn is done preparing them, the old wizard keeps his staff in hand, glaring at Pippin every time that he comes too close to them. He will not have him steal any of the delicacies before the night has even started, thank you very much.

Merry returns to the kitchen after adding the chair requested by Frodo to the living room.

‘Towels are up, Sam,’ he says, burying his hands in his pockets. ‘What can I do next?’

‘I think we should be alright by now,’ the cooking Hobbit replied, stirring the stew with a satisfied grin. ‘Have you swept the hallway too?’

‘As requested, yes. By the way, why are you cooking a stew for movie night? I doubt anyone will feel like eating that.’

‘Nonsense! Every night is good for stew. You’re just jealous you can’t cook one as delicious as this one. Oh, by the way, are the ales ready?’

Merry thinks for a moment and nods.

‘They are, but I will add some to the fridge just to be safe.’

‘Thanks.’

The doorbell rings, heralding the first guest’s arrival. Faramir opens the door and instantly opened his arms to embrace his older brother.

‘Welcome, Boromir,’ he chimes, patting his back. ‘You are the first one to arrive!’

‘Éowyn threatened to slit my throat if I arrived late, so I did not have much of a choice.’

‘Ah, you know how she gets. Come in, let me take your coat.’

As Faramir hangs Boromir’s coat on the rack and closes the door, Boromir waves at the company, holding up a pack of fresh ales. Merry takes the cans from him, enthusiastically greeting him and showing him to Frodo, who guides him to his assigned seat. The newcomer sits down and begins to chatter with Gandalf, exchanging pleasantries and catching up with each other.

Soon after, Legolas and Gimli arrive, all smiles and hand in hand. Their cloaks are gracefully taken by Faramir once more, and they step inside the living room.

‘I brought Lembas bread,’ Legolas announces with pride, placing the leaf he has wrapped them in on the table along with the other snacks.

‘A whole Elvish culinary culture, yet it is always Lembas bread he brings to everything,’ Gimli groans behind his boyfriend’s back to Boromir.

Éowyn throws a glance at the clock on the wall and grunts.

‘They are late. Unbelievable.’

‘That is quite alright,’ Gandalf laughs. ‘The Rohirrim are never late, nor are they early.’

‘Yes, yes, they arrive precisely when they mean to, I have heard that before.’

‘No. They are terrible when it comes to time management.’

The old wizard’s playful remark triggers a chuckle from Éowyn, enabling her to relax after having insisted for days that everybody come on time for the film. She warned them and yet they do not bother respecting the time given to them. It is their loss, she thinks to herself. There is nothing more that she can do.

Sam peeks into the living room to ensure that everything is in order. Taking off his oven mittens, he admires everybody’s work with glee.

‘Well, I see that we are still missing four people. Ah, well, they are all supposed to bring something, so… You can already have a nibble, but do not go overboard. Especially you, Merry and Pippin!’

‘We would not dare!’

‘Don’t worry, Sam,’ Gandalf reassures the busy Hobbit, ‘I am keeping an eye on them.’

Sam nods and disappears into the kitchen again. At the same time, another guest announces their arrival through the ringing of the doorbell. When Faramir answers it, Arwen gasps with joy and trots up to her father to embrace him.

‘Ada!’

Elrond grins and lifts his daughter as he presses a kiss to her temple.

‘I apologise for the delay, little star,’ he says, gently patting her cheek. ‘Somebody parked their horse in the worst way possible outside.’

Before Faramir can close the door after the Elven lord, somebody pushes it open, nearly sending it crashing against his nose.

‘Sorry, sorry, I’m here! Rang at the wrong house.’

Out of breath and his golden hair dishevelled, Éomer has no coat to hand to his brother-in-law. The latter, however, instantly leans in to whisper to him.

‘Steer clear of your sister if you want to make it out of here alive.’

‘Ah, let her skin me. Not the first time.’

Before his sister stumbles upon him and scolds him, the Rohir opens a box of store-bought doughnuts and puts it on the table, compromising on a spot with Elrond, who has come with some Elven pastries for everyone to enjoy. Since some of the guests have already started to eat, they already pick something to nibble on. Aragorn lifts one of the swords carrying a piece of cheese, but before he can tuck it between his teeth, Arwen snatches it and holds it up teasingly.

‘Hey, that’s mine!’ he laughs, taking her by the waist.

‘If you want it, come and claim it.’

‘Mh. I could retrieve it by force, but it is not this day.’

And so, she throws the cheese into her mouth, giggling as Aragorn comes to place a tender kiss upon her rosy lips. Meanwhile, Frodo starts gathering the guests and showing them to their assigned seats and chairs, explaining his choice but allowing them to switch at any time. Pippin walks around asking what everybody wants to drink, acting like a waiter while Merry fetches the beverages that his cousin requests.

Théoden arrives shortly after, carrying the best wines that Rohan has to offer. Éowyn takes him by the hand and leads him to a comfortable armchair, while Pippin comes to tend to him, offering him something to eat. The king of Rohan decides to share a bottle of wine with Elrond and Gandalf as they watch Frodo pacing up and down.

‘There is something missing. But I forgot what it is.’

‘Some actual Elven food, maybe?’ Gimli grunts, eyeing Legolas before following Merry to help him carry a large cool box to the living room, so every drink will be easy to reach.

As Frodo regards Legolas quizzically, the latter whispers:

‘Have you learnt nothing of the stubbornness of dwarves?’

‘But it is the eleventh event in a row that you bring Lembas bread.’

‘It is consistent food, does not require a lot of preparation, does not take up much space… It is the perfect choice.’

The Hobbit nods with a dubitative expression, before patting him in the back. He circles around the table and observes the decoration again, the coats on the rack, the seats he has assigned on his list… Oh. There is one vacant, with no name assigned to it.

Behind him, Sam claps his hands and everyone hurries off to their seat. Boromir sits on the end of the couch beside his brother, playfully rubbing his knuckles against Faramir’s scalp, holding him in a gentle headlock and laughing. Éowyn sits next to her husband and pats the space next to her to invite Éomer to join them.

Éomer grumbles and sits down with his arms crossed.

‘You two lovebirds better not snog the entire time,’ he groans. ‘It is sickening.’

‘Oh, shush.’

The three elders sit around each other, while the four Hobbits plan to sit on cushions on the floor, preferring the cosiness of the set-up to the mismatched chairs. On the right side, Gimli and Legolas sit beside each other, with the dwarf discreetly biting a piece of Lembas bread that he will never admit to having consumed to Legolas, who reclines into his chair with a cup of wine in his hand. Next to them, Aragorn and Arwen take their seats, bringing them closer together so they can cuddle while watching the film.

Sam serves everyone a small cauldron-shaped bowl of stew, much to their surprise, but nobody criticises the choice. They all gladly devour the beef, potatoes and vegetables while Pippin makes the (very) questionable choice to alternate between a spoonful of the sauce and a lick at a ring pop on his finger. While he tastes the candy, a screech resonates against the window from outside.

Two wide blue eyes ogle the Hobbit’s treat.

‘Preciousss?’

Before anybody has time to react, Faramir closes the blinds in Sméagol’s face.

Frodo is still confused. He counts everything on the table again, the number of seats that he planned for. There is still somebody and something missing.

When the doorbell rings, Frodo rushes to welcome the last guest. All smiles and carrying two wide salad bowls full of popcorn, a young man with long, dark blond hair appears.

‘Hi, sorry that I am late.’

‘Théodred!’

Éomer is beyond relieved to see his cousin at the door. He makes some more space between himself and his sister for him to sit.

‘There is no movie night without popcorn,’ Merry coos. ‘Alright, I believe that everyone’s here and we have all the snacks in the world!’

‘Indeed,’ Sam grins. ‘Everybody sit down.’

Théodred hugs his father and bypasses the Hobbit, careful not to step on them as he walks past them on his way to the couch. He settles between his two adoptive siblings and gladly accepts wine from Sam.

‘I am glad that you are here,’ Éomer whispers to him. ‘That way I won’t have to see Éowyn and Fari making out the whole time.’

‘Don’t be an arse, ‘Mer,’ Théodred sighs without even casting a glance in his direction, watching Aragorn switch on the TV and browse a whole catalogue of films until he finds the right one.

Sam switches off the light before sitting down, plunging the living room into darkness, if not for the many candles and fairy lights carefully laid out by Arwen. Aragorn selects the film and it starts to play.

‘Ah, The Return of the King!’ Legolas exclaims joyfully. ‘Excellent choice.’

‘I can’t wait to see Boromir die again!’ Pippin cackles, earning a loud ‘Hey!’ from the concerned party.

Merry leans closer, munching one of Elrond’s pastries.

‘It’s not in that one, Pip.’

‘Oh.’

As the title screen appears, Arwen leans on her elbows, resting her chin in the palms of her hands and staring fondly at the television.

‘Twenty years. Can you believe it?’

‘Time flies, that is for sure,’ Théoden grins, raising his glass before sipping his wine.

‘Unbelievable,’ Gimli scoffs, realising how long it has been since it all happened. ‘Do you think that there is someone out there who enjoys our adventures as much as we did?’

There is a long moment of silence, only disturbed by the film’s music. Frodo crosses his arms with a sullen expression.

‘Enjoy is a bit of an overstatement.’

And here we are, at the end of LotR Week. It has been an amazing challenge to write these short pieces with such vague yet inspiring prompts about our favourite characters and this trilogy that means so much to us for different reasons.

Thank you, @lotr20 and especially @southfarthing, for organising all of that. I'm definitely going to miss this event now that it's done. You have sparked such camaraderie within the fandom, connected strangers and inspired others, and it is nothing short of amazing.

Thank you to all of those who have engaged with my writing in one way or another, who have shared my works and taken the time to not only read them, but comment on them. A special shoutout to @konartiste, @emmanuellececchi, @from-the-coffee-shop-in-edoras, @sotwk and @meluiloth-of-rivendell for your support. You have made me fall in love with writing all over again and you have made me feel so appreciated and accepted this week! ♥

And, of course, happy anniversary to The Return of the King, a film that moves me beyond belief and that brings me so much comfort when I need it. I wish I had the time to watch it today to celebrate, but unfortunately, time wasn't on my side. So here's this little piece instead!

#can't believe I made it to the final prompt #I'm going to miss this event so much #thank you southfarthing for organising it!!! #lotr week #The Return of the King #lotr #Frodo #Sam #Merry #Pippin #Boromir #Aragorn #Arwen #Legolas #Gimli #Gandalf #Eowyn #Faramir #Elrond #Eomer #Théoden #Théodred #modern au #lotr fic #lotr fanfic #lotr fanfiction #lord of the rings fanfic #lord of the rings fic #lord of the rings fanfiction #lotr modern au

[shirefantasies]

Am I too late to join in on matchups? If so please just ignore this ask and know that I'm sorry

I'd like a male ship please. I'm an autistic girl with adhd and a couple chronic illnesses like joint pain especially in my hands and dyspraxia so I'm super clumsy. I'm 4' 10" tall with long wavy auburn hair, glasses, pale skin that's covered in freckles and moles and a petite figure. I'm very friendly and bubbly but I can also be kinda asocial and don't actively seek out interaction much. I enjoy writing, drawing (recently I've been getting really into MS Paint art), video games, reading, hiking and researching things that interest me. I'm very intelligent and also witty, I'm actually pretty good at making people laugh! I work as a librarian and am hoping to become a linguist someday too. Thanks!

"Hey sweetie, here's my additions for my matchup description! Thanks so much for taking the time to do all these ships, you're a true saint. I hope these don't conflict with the draft you have set up already

🪆 I’m both very level-headed and very stubborn, and I can also be quite fierce and even argumentative but that’s fairly rare. I just don’t tend to back down easily, and I’m a very resilient person

🪆 I can be a bit of a homebody, especially since I’m disabled, and I get very attached to wherever I happen to be living. I like having a garden whenever possible too, even if it's an indoor one.

🪆 I’m very friendly and sweet, but I also like messing with people a little. This is especially fun because I have unusual interests like botanical poisons or the science of decomposition. I can tend to be pretty morbid without even realizing it. That being said, my friendly side is no facade and I genuinely love taking care of people.

🪆 I especially love cooking for people and trying to recipes for others

🪆 I enjoy working out but am still very skinny. It’s actually funny how my large arms contrast with my Disney Princess-esque waist

🪆 I like to take relationships very very slowly and develop a solid friendship before considering dating someone, so I really don't want someone who takes things too fast. I'm also not a fan of overly flirty people, even if they're completely loyal to me I just get turned off by over the top displays of affection. 

🪆 I have legendary pain tolerance and tend to laugh off injuries more than anything

🪆 I’m addicted to buying new books, particularly on witchcraft and botany

🪆 I know a LOT about different types of spirits and deities, especially as a witch. I could go on and on about spirit lore for hours

Thanks, have a great day!"

Not too late at all! & I was really early on in it so this is fine! I can kind of work to combine them in fact 😁 They just take a long time lmao 😅 hope it’s ok I went LoTR because your man is…

Frodo!

You aren't used to being approached while you work; quite the contrary, in fact, many passersby almost seem to treat you like you don't exist at all when you appear in the peripheries of their vision hunched over your books and scrolls. Which, admittedly, is suitable to you as your work is quite consuming. Quenya translations do not come without focus, after all. So when a voice sounds at your back, your clumsy side emerges as you startle, almost overturning your ink pot before a small, pale hand darts out to catch and right it. “My apologies,” you hear from behind you, “I was just curious what form of Elvish that was.”

Turning around, you see a hobbit, dark-haired and blue-eyed and shyly smiling at you. He is clad in a white shirt and brown pants and something about the navy vest he wears gives him a studious air. You smile. “Quenya, very old. In fact this book,” you motion over the tome you’ve been comparing against the ancient scroll, “is a chronicle of the witches of old. Quick different from anything we see these days.” A mixture of teasing and apprehension crossed the hobbit’s visage. “And what are you doing with a book like that?” “Looking for a way to raise my undead army,” you tease back, leaning forward toward him in your chair. At that, both of you laugh and exchange introductions. His name is Frodo and it would seem his uncle is quite a student of languages as well, teaching Frodo newer, more practical forms of Elvish and studying some Khuzdul himself. In fact, he is only there outside the Shire to have an old book of his uncle’s appraised.

You can’t help the wave of distraction that overtakes you after you offer your own skills, though; adjusting your spectacles and pushing your chair back, you cannot resist asking Frodo about his Shire. He pulls back a chair of his own, taking up a spot at your side with a smile you can only describe as lovestruck. Stubborn as you can be, you give no fight to the derailment of your work as Frodo speaks of rolling green hills, warm hearths and sunny gardens and flowers hung upon fences. You understand his expression completely, a sigh escaping your own lips at his vividly gorgeous words. "We may know little of your witchcraft or translations in the Shire, but it's home. The greatest home I could ask for." He had you at sunny gardens. "I would love to see it," you reply, setting your quill down. "He isn't always fond of guests," Frodo chuckles, folding his arms on the table, "but I think someone with your knowledge and spirit would quite amuse him. Come and visit us. I will have Uncle Bilbo convinced by the time you get there." "Oh, he needs convincing, does he?" "Perhaps you could put a spell of some sort on him."

The older hobbit you quickly learn is Frodo’s uncle Bilbo still looks surprised by your presence at his nephew’s side, but he gets a glitter in his eyes you expect to be quite characteristic once you bring up your meeting with Frodo. You end up talking to Bilbo as much as his nephew at dinner, in fact, sharing many glances with the proudly smiling Frodo as you hear the most amazing tales of dwarf-song and dragon fire and even time spent alongside Lord Elrond himself in the great homely house. Bilbo chuckles at the way your eyes light up, your questions about the magic woven around Rivendell and how different it is from the small spells you’ve attempted. That certainly gets the old hobbit’s eyebrows shooting up! At the end of it, you agree with Frodo’s assessment of the Shire’s warm hearths and have continued invitations to see your friends.

And that is definitely how you see it for quite some time, after all you work with Bilbo as much as you run around the Shire woods with Frodo, dodging his cousins plucking up mushrooms and trading botany facts and tips with Samwise, Bag End’s gardener, while Frodo looks on with the smile you’ve grown to love. Suspicion that he is just teasing you rises one day when he looks at you fondly, half-asking, half making a statement to you. "You really have fallen for the Shire, haven't you?" Of course you have. The hobbits admire your strength, at least for the most part- those that poke at you about big folk disturbing the peace or the Bagginses stirring things up again risk your comebacks, after all, the bite of your wit tearing perfectly back against the bore of their lives and personalities. Every time you swivel from such interactions, there is Frodo and that fond smile that suddenly you aren't so sure how to respond to. You don't know what to do when he takes your hand to show you something or catches you when your feet slip out from under you, hands about your waist. You don't mind, especially given Frodo's knowledge that your hands get achy and cold and somehow his find them right as it sets in, and beside that he was nothing but a gentleman to you. That in and of itself seems to be the sudden source of your hysteria right up to the moment Frodo rises onto his tiptoes and presses his lips ever so gently to yours. He's told you again and again over your compared translation notes, over twisting little charms and flower crowns together, over even blood and bandages and your laughter over the way your dear hobbit frets while you feel next to nothing.

You are lucky in the gift of Frodo as you frequently tell him, as you make known when you take his arm on a hike and share in that fond smile he gives you. Frodo is a gentle soul, affectionate but not so overt in his advance as to deter you. To put it bluntly, Frodo is not a sexual person, so the nature of your relationship as it is and the love you share in your spent time are plenty to satisfy him. Forever you have someone to bring you tea and a kiss to the crown of your auburn head as you pore over documents, someone to bake for and an uncle who laughs heartily at every insistence of yours that he needs to take you to Rivendell to study their wards, throwing in the Lonely Mountain for good measure. Between the three of you, Bag End fills with books in no time, but you certainly cannot complain when some of them are quite ancient indeed, teasing challenges by your favorite hobbits, one of whom sees himself in you and the other who simply sees the beauty in you while you work. Even if sometimes you work a little too hard and he has to help you back into your now-shared hobbit hole to rest your back after a little too long sketching, weeding, and planting in the garden you are beautiful, shining with sweat and dabbed with proof of your connection to the earth. You certainly are the best thing Frodo has brought home on an errand.

Taglist: @lokilover476 @fuckyoumakeart @mossthebogwitch @ibabblealot @kilibaggins @stormchaser819 @pirate-lord-of-narnia @datglutengoblin @letmelickyoureyeballs | Reply/Ask/Message to join 🥰

#lord of the rings #lotr #lotr imagines #lotr x reader #lotr matchups #frodo #frodo x reader #frodo x female reader #female reader #ask #tolkien-fantasy #requested #matchup monday

[trash-soup]

Since my blog is gaining followers i figured I'd do a pinned intro

HI! I'm Sabri. I'm 29, I'm 6'4", and I'm a Hispanic Latine Genderfluid Nonbinary Pansexual (any pronouns, whatever you feel most comfy with 😊)

Everyone is welcome here except the following

DNI: Race/age/ableists, Xeno/Homo/Transphobes, Anti-Semitic/generally hateful/toxic and otherwise vile people.

On this blog, we stand for a FREE PALESTINE, Black Lives Matter, AAPI Lives Matter, Jewish Lives Matter, Palestinian Lives Matter, Latine Lives matter, LGBTQ+ Lives Matter, Indigenous Lives Matter, Genocide is condemned, Trans Women are real women, Trans Men are real men, Non-Binary and Queer people who don't fit into standard boxes are valid, Ace and Aro people are valid, all bodies are beautiful, Nobody owes you androgyny or anything else because of their pronouns or labels, and Love is love is love. Kindly fuck off if you disagree with any of that.

Things I love:

Hobbies: Gaming, reading, writing, cooking, cackling at memes, learning useless knowledge about niche subjects, singing, playing guitar, More.

Games: Stardew Valley (all time favorite), The Sims, Frostpunk, The Witcher, Age of Empires, Tsuki's Odyssey, Animal Crossing, Legend of Zelda, Super Smash Bros, Mario Kart, Assassin's Creed, The Elder Scrolls, More.

Books: Just literature in general, Edgar Allen Poe, the Osten Ard series, Tolkien, George RR Martin, Harry Potter(Fuck JK tho), ASOUE, More.

Music: Sara Bareilles, Nelward, Soupy Garbage Juice, The Altogether, Led Zeppelin, Classic rock/Folk rock/Folk pop/indie/Alternative, More.

Movies/TV: LOTR/The Hobbit, Harry Potter (Fuck JK tho), ASOUE, Game of Thrones, Pirates of the Caribbean, Ted Lasso, Sex Education, The Witcher, Doctor who, Supernatural, Sherlock (Yes i was a Superwholock, shut up), Bob's Burgers, South Park, Pixar, Disney, Star Wars, Star Trek, Marvel, Poirot, More.

Youtube: Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, Dimension 20, Dropout, Gab Smolders, Crankgameplays, Game Grumps, Jarvis Johnson, Andy King, Drew Gooden, Danny Gonzalez, Kurtis Conner, Chad Chad, @strange-aeons, Sarah Z, Sam Onella, Binging with Babish, Uncle Roger, More.

Aesthetic stuff: Dark Academia, Cottagecore, Victorian, Nature, Art Nouveau, Edwardian, More.

I used to be @theactorsmind-blog and @theactorsmind-blog1, but those have long since been dead.

I've been on this hellsite since i was about 14, on and off sometimes. I was here stealing shoelaces, I've liked the color of the sky, i saw (read:Participated in) the mishapocalypse, i witnessed the great Titty Famine, I've been around for a good long while.

#genderfluid #pansexual #markiplier #gab smolders #sara bareilles #Gaming #stardew valley #the sims #lotr #memes #osten ard #asoiaf #asoue #harry potter #superwholock #the witcher #led zeppelin #lizzo #strange aeons #Game Grumps #crankgameplays #jacksepticeye #transfem #and currently beginning my transition #transfemme #jarvis johnson #drew gooden #kurtis conner #danny gonzalez #Pirates of the Caribbean

[lovelymindescape]

Hi, this is for our LOTR matchup trade!

I’m Tori, a 20 year old autistic girl (pronouns she/her) who would prefer a ship with a man. Also, I tend to prefer the humans in middle earth (so like Aragorn, Faramir, Boromir and Eomer) so if you could kindly ship me with one of them specifically I’d be very grateful.

I’m really short, only like 4’ 10” (142 cm) with wild, long and wavy auburn hair and really light blue eyes. I’m slender but very toned, and I also wear glasses. I'm pretty neutral about both my appearance and myself in general and I don't think I genuinely hate anything about myself. I'm generally neutral about most things actually. I have chronic joint pain all over, scoliosis and some other illnesses but I stay very active regardless. I’m really polite and try my hardest to be nice to everyone, but if you cross me or give me a bad vibe I can be a little cold and aloof. I’m a tad awkward, but I’ve been told I can be charming and I’m really good at making others laugh with witty comments. I tell amazing stories because I've had a lot of experience with different things during my life. I’m very generous and don’t mind helping others or doing nice things for them. I’m also extremely energetic and always have to be doing something, to the point where I’m honestly not sure I really know how to rest. My friends say I give really good advice and am very wise, and also that I have warm, inviting energy. I could lowkey befriend anyone if I really tried. Though I'm also very sensitive and don't enjoy being teased too much, so I don't tease people much either. I hate seeing people, or really anything, upset.

Where I really shine is with my large number of hobbies and interests. Because I always like to keep busy, I have a lot of different activities and side gigs to keep me occupied. In Middle Earth, I’d probably be some sort of ranger who picks up a bunch of odd jobs here and there. I currently work as a librarian but my other hobbies include:

🦉 Falconry & befriending crows

🦉 Caring for horses (I've always been a horse girl lol)

🦉 Cheesemaking, Cooking and Baking

🦉 Gardening and Plant Identification

🦉 Writing, Journaling and Drawing

🦉 Sewing

And a couple other things. I’m generally a very skilled, knowledgeable person and I’m very proud of it. I love being outside and can’t stand being cooped up indoors for too long. However, I do enjoy having somewhere nice to return to when I get tired from being outside all day.

Alright, I think that’s about it! Thank you so so much, take care of yourself and drink lots of water!

Hey , i'm so so so so sorry it took so long , but i had stress the last days and forgot about it <3 anymore i hope you like this

I ship you with

ARAGORN

your both rangers so that works

you probably met while you both were roaming around middelearth

you had the same route for awhile so you stayed together

you parted the work you had like , you would cook while he looked out for possible danger , then you would eat and you both switch

he soon was considerate to your illnesses and would have respect for what you do even with this

he would love that you are neutral about most things cause he kinda don't likes people who are

before you'd go to bed you would tell eachother stories

he would make you rest even if you don't want to

when decisions would get make he would ask you before anyone else

the confession was very blunt but calm while you to were heading to the next stop to sleep

it's basically the same afterwards but with more romance <3

he would be impressed by how much hobbies you had and always ask if he could help somehow

if your being to nice to someone , who doesn't is very nice , he would step in

he throw compliements and i love you's at the most random times

all in all it's a loving, protecting and supportive relationship

It's a bit short i know , i hope you liked it

#lord of the rings #matchups #matchup request #middle earth #the lord of the rings #aragorn son of arathorn #aragorn x reader #lotr #the fellowship of the ring

[fluffyllamas-23]

🎮🩹🐈🍃🍝 for Jason and Ryan?

Thank you for this! As a refresher, Jason is an elementary school principal, and Ryan is an attorney. I’m also including Paul and Aiden like you suggested the other day. Paul is a writer who recently published his first novel and has had some short stories published in magazines. Aiden owns a christmas tree farm with his family (okay that’s kind of a random occupation, I know, but last year I decided I needed some OCs modeled after hallmark movie characters so here they are lmfao). Some slight TW for mentions of ab//use

🎮 What are three of your oc's favorite hobbies?

Jason: Pretty much all of his hobbies are outdoors or involve being active. He loves to hike. It helps him clear his mind and get his thoughts in order if his ADHD meds aren’t doing their job. He likes to go with Ryan, too. He’s into rock climbing as well. He never does it outside, but he’ll go to the gym that has a really nice rock climbing wall and can spend hours there. He also plays soccer in a rec league. He played soccer for years, all through high school and in college, and now he has the rec league to get his soccer fix.

Ryan: Ryan loves to read, and his favorite genre is high fantasy. He has a few authors whose work he loves to relax to, and he will frequently re-read books. If he’s had a really long and stressful day, he’ll come home and pick up his VERY well loved copy of LOTR and will read that for a bit to decompress. He loves to hike, too. It’s something he and Jason like to do together. Sometimes they bring their kids on kid-friendly ones, other times they find someone to watch them so they can do more strenuous ones. He loves to play the piano, too. He’s been playing off and on for a number of years, and really enjoys finding his favorite movie scores and trying to teach them to himself. 

Paul: Paul is a big art history buff. He loves going on museum dates with Aiden (they’re his FAVORITE dates), and going to the museum when there are new exhibits. He also has a few pieces from his favorite artists hanging up in his office and their house. He’s a big reader, too. Kind of cliche for a writer, but he truly believes that the best way to write well is to consume as much literature as possible, so he does. When he was married to his ex, he loved reading because it was an escape from his really toxic relationship and something he could dissociate with. Now, though, he reads more for enjoyment and relaxation. He’s really into film as well. He has favorites from all decades and will spend hours listening to podcasts on his favorite ones and consuming as much media about them as possible. 

Aiden: Aiden is clinically insa-I mean loves to run! He was on the cross-country team all throughout middle and high school, and kept it up after. It’s something that’s really grounding and soothing for him, and he’ll often go on a second run if he’s feeling extra stressed for whatever reason that day. He likes pottery, too, and will often go to the local pottery shop where he can take classes. One day he’d like to have a studio setup in their house, but until then he just goes to the shop. He’s a really great cook, too and loves it a lot. He loves challenging himself to make really complicated recipes and can usually pull them off beautifully. Paul also enjoys this hobby of his because he always benefits from it lmao. 

🩹 Does your oc have any physical and/or mental disabilities?

Jason: Jason has no physical disabilities, but he is neurodivergent. He has ADHD and is medicated for it. He takes meds everyday which usually help beautifully - it quiets his brain and allows him to be much more organized in his day to day life. He’s an elementary school principal and he NEEDS to be able to be quick and with it enough when managing his employees, the kids, and their parents. It’s a lot and he would feel incapable of doing it well if he weren’t medicated. On days where his normal dose doesn’t work for whatever reason, he’s been prescribed another low dose, quick release med he can take to give him the boost he needs. He’s also dyslexic. He had the loveliest tutor when he was in school who had a lot of experience working with students who have learning disabilities and it helped him make it through. As an adult, he still won’t read for fun because he finds it stressful. It’s difficult to keep his place, and the words get all jumbled up and he gets really frustrated. He can do it for work when he has to but he has to really slow down and take his time. One of his office managers, Alaina, will often read whatever it is to him and help him transcribe emails as long as it’s not any sensitive student information he has to read. She’s pretty much family at this point (he was her student in his first year of teaching, so he’s known her for a lot of her life) and she never makes him feel judged or embarrassed by needing help.  

Ryan: Ryan doesn’t have any physical or mental disabilities. 

Paul: Paul has no physical disabilities, but he has anxiety and depression and is medicated for both. The antidepressants are an everyday, he MUST take them, kind of thing, but the anxiety meds are more for if all of his coping mechanisms aren’t working and he needs them on a rescue-basis. 

Aiden: Aiden has no physical or mental disabilities.

🐈 Does your oc prefer a wide circle of friends or a few close friends?

Jason: Jason has a wide circle of friends that he likes to hang out with sometimes. They’ll all go out to the movies, or for dinner and drinks, stuff like that. Most of them also have kids, so they’ll often have gatherings where the kids can go hang out while the adults do as well. Even though he loves that bigger group of friends, he has a pretty small circle of a handful of friends he’d consider his best friends.

Ryan: Ryan prefers a smaller circle of friends. He’s not a huge fan of large social gatherings, though he’ll sometimes come to dinner and drinks with Jason’s larger group of friends. Sometimes he’ll go out for happy hour with his coworkers at his firm, too, but overall he definitely prefers to keep a really small close group of friends. 

Paul: Paul is really introverted. It takes a while for him to trust people enough to let them in because he just doesn’t trust people easily. His ex-husband was abusive and really isolated him, so he lost a lot of friends during that relationship. He’s slowly building his social circle back, but it’s just going to take awhile. 

Aiden: Aiden has a larger social circle than Paul, but he’s not looking to expand it, really. He still doesn’t have a ton of friends in his social circle, as he really prefers quality over quantity. 

🍃 What is/was your oc's favorite subject in school?

Jason: Jason was a big fan of hands-on subjects.  His favorite academic subject was any science class he took that had a heavy hands-on component, and his favorite non-academic subjects were ceramics and woodshop. He’s really good at working with his hands and I think if he hadn’t gone into teaching, he’d have skipped college and gone to some sort of trade school.

Ryan: Ryan’s favorite subjects in school were pretty much any history class, and his speech and debate classes. That may be kind of cliche bc lawyer, but he really thrived in those classes.

Paul: His favorite classes were always his English classes. He’s always loved all sorts of literature and writing, and had always had his teachers tell him he should seriously consider becoming a writer. He also loved history, specifically the art history courses he took in college. He would frequently take those as his elective even if they weren’t technically considered electives. 

Aiden: Aiden was NOT an academic person. He didn’t like school, and there were no subjects he was passionate about. He hated being stuck inside, he hated the fluorescent lights, and he hated having to sit for long stretches of time. He’s smart and did well by just skating by but he resented having to sit and learn everything lmao. He did really like gym class and ended up being in cross country in middle and high school. He just has a lot of energy and it wasn’t conducive to having to sit for long periods of time. 

🍝 What is/are your oc's favorite food(s)?

Jason: Jason is your classic ADHD “hyperfixation meal” kinda guy. He’ll only want to eat something for weeks and then all of a sudden is so tired of it and doesn’t want it anymore, and then he’ll move onto the next thing. He’s not really a fan of complicated, fancy food. He’d much rather have pizza and wings, or mac n cheese, or a burger than going to grab sushi.

Ryan: Ryan, in contrast to his husband, is a big fan of really interesting food, complex food. He really likes any kind of Asian food, especially sushi and will frequently go get it with the other partners and attorneys at his firm. 

Paul: Paul really loves diner food. Grilled cheese, mac n cheese, burgers, that kind of thing. He also likes steak, which is good because Aiden loves that. He’s pretty picky and likes what he likes. His ex always made him feel guilty for his food preferences and would often make comments about how he can’t have what he likes because Paul is soooooo picky and it would make him feel bad. Aiden will tell him not to feel bad about what he wants to eat and he’s happy to go wherever Paul wants to go.

Aiden: Aiden is a big steak and potatoes person. He loves loaded baked potatoes and loaded baked potato soup, and if he could subsist solely on steak and potatoes, he WOULD. He and Paul will frequently go out on dates to the museum and then finish the night off with a fancy steakhouse. 

#OCs #TW abuse #sort of #Paul and aiden #Ryan and jason

[carry-on-every-neverland-magic]

Tears of the Kingdom is fucking beautiful

MILD SPOILERS

Okay so I have just completed the Great Sky Island (but am definitely gonna go back as some places I couldn’t get to and I need to stock up on stuff plus the nice constructs like the cooking ones etc are so freakin cute) but man this is so epic I mean I love Breath of the Wild even though I was late getting it, I’m not a gamer but Zelda and Animal Crossing are my jam and what I love about BOTW and TOTK is its you own adventure like sometimes I literally just ride my horse around looking at pretty ruins. TOTK is as phenomenal and beautiful as BOTW with that extra element of fun which makes different from BOTW because of all these new tricks and such but BOTW is magical and epic and charming and TOTK is too and I love all the new things like brightbloom flowers and a weird frog in a cave THERES SO MUCH and by FUCK the moment I dived from the great sky island down to Hyrule CHILLS MAN. I just love the imagination, the lore, the humour, the adventure, the beauty (and the fact that someone said Zelda is like lotr and I think thats why I love it so much) I’m just immersed I got zero sleep last night playing it xD But am really glad I figured everything out by myself. BOTW I had watched a lot of people play so I kinda had a plan going in like I wanted to unlock all the map, get all the armour etc to be able to freely travel and I loved that (and I used guides only for labyrinths and asshole shrines I couldn’t get past lol) but TOTK I wanna try and do it with no help. I haven’t even finished my last divine beast in BOTW xD I just love these games so much and I feel so excited and hyped playing TOTK im sobbing ON THE FLOOR its everything 

#totk spoilers #totk #botw #the legend of zelda #this is by no means a review there's far too much to yell about #but its a 100/10 for sure

[daisyachain]

When consuming works in translation or even cross-cultural works in the same language, your standard midwestern white US reader (and more broadly your standard anglophone) is going to bring their own cultural structures and impose them externally on the work no matter what. This is the weeb blog so we all know what I’m talking about.

One specific example of this is the way that white/anglophone/US cultural consumers treat male ‘femininity’. In US culture, it’s a truth universally known (by girls) that girls like a girly guy or at least that the male figure most attractive to female consumers (who make up the majority of the audience for fiction in the US whether or not they’re considered as such by marketing teams) is a figure that they can relate to. The floppy boy band member, the middle aged man with cooking skills, whatever. US/Anglo standards of masculinity are also bizarrely tilted towards performance. SoCal-type standard US culture is as misogynist as any other culture (ie it’s misogynist), it’s just that this misogyny has its own flavour of expressing itself. Everywhere does.

In the broad anglo milieu, any hint of personal grooming, self-awareness, shyness, emotivity, or non-ripped physique is interpreted as feminine. The skinny boy band member, the jeans-wearing metrosexual, the vegetarian, the fat kid who hangs out with the girls in gym class because that’s the path that is least likely to end in physical assault. These are all sissies. The merest lack of sufficient beer-n-bacon posturing is taken for wearing a pride flag. By US standards, a non-muscled man who wears even slightly fashionable clothes is [twelve year old boy voice] gayyyyyy. The standard homophobic gay stereotype is a finger-fluttering peacock who can’t stand to chip a nail.

Go over to eg Japanese culture (most commonly consumed works in translation in the US), the stereotype is completely different. The archetypical male heterosexual romantic lead isn’t a sleeve-busting hunk, it’s a skinny, floppy, long-haired guy with delicate fingers and sparkling eyes. The homophobic stereotype is a muscle-bound thick-jawed mascara-wearer. This doesn’t mean that the bishounen/ikemen archetype is necessarily considered feminine. On the contrary, it’s another masculine ideal. No one in the US could possibly (in the public imagination) aspire to be a patterned-tie fashionista unless he’s gay or foreign. But, overseas, the reserved and cutting-edge fashion-conscious man is revered as an object of female desire.

Well it’s not quite as clean cut as all that but you get what I’m saying. You can see it in the translation of ‘ikemen’ to ‘pretty boy’. The original just means ‘a hot guy’ the other is a homophobic insult 90% of the time, but English really doesn’t have an equivalent term. Also why 00s weebs just referred to ‘bishies’, it’s because there’s no English term for it that isn’t in some way homophobic. I’ve seen ‘hottie’ used as a translation as well, but that’s got its own baggage as it’s exclusively a term associated with women’s speech, so it doesn’t make sense to have male characters refer to it without coming off as overtly gay.

So that brings us to: it’s a common misinterpretation for the bishounen/ikemen characters or presentations to be read as ‘gay’ by a US audience. Viz. BTS fandom and haters, shippers, etc. This is because there’s no real equivalent to this concept in the US without homophobic overtones. The closest you might possibly get is ‘boy band member’, but that also has oodles of homophobia as all of us who were there for the Bieber era remember. Rather than ice-cold idols of female worship, the US interpretation of a bishounen is of a girly guy.

Except, we’ve gotten to the point where US consumption and regurgitation of foreign cultural tropes has is on its third or fourth cycle. People are now instantly imitating their favourite art as it comes out with the help of the internet. LoTR shows up in JJK. RWBY gets a mediocre 2D anime. And League, famous for being the midpoint of US cultural context and East Asian cultural influence, puts up promotional material for the character Hwei. Who seems to be made to fit into the line of bishounen characters that have been coming out of the League design factory (Aphelios, Viego, Sett, some Ezreal skins) but who doesn’t belong there at all and instead comes out as a startlingly straightforward (hah) design for a femme gay character

#kelsey rambles #god im so sorry to put all that preamble and have the punchline be: ‘league’ #but it compels me! #the very midpoint between exchange and reworking and misinterpretation. League understands the concept of the heterosexual bishie well #and can reproduce it on demand which is why it’s so jarring to see the apparent misinterpretation be put up there as well #and because the gay overtones on hwei are missing from eg viego then it has to be deliberate. because if it were a misinterpretation #of the one trope they’re tryna hit then it would be on all characters

[kcrossvine-art]

hi friends! :D y'all voted and fought neck and neck for this SO- heres the first entry into our little cooking journey of J. R. R. Tolkeins fictional food for his fictional little guys he puts in fictional turmoils for our enjoyment and awe!

 Before we get started i wanna say i owe my heart to all the LotR fans who upkeep the wiki, debate the cannon, and create their own versions of the foods mentioned. Both because of my love for people who LOVE (passionate people)(passion about anything) and because my own knowledge of this series is a little dusty. I've never seen the movies but I did read the books growing up. I'll be learning and remembering things from a fairly newbie standpoint, so no worries if you yourself arent familiar with the series! (and if you are familiar, hopefully youll forgive me!)

We will be making Lembas ('waybread') today! If you've made your own version of this please feel free to share it, similarly if you have any ideas for what we make next!

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to Lembas?” YOU MIGHT ASKWell so the funny thing is we kinda dont know. At least not entirely? The elves are dicks like that. But heres what we'll be using in ours-

Butter

Self-rising flour

Granulated Sugar

Raisins

A small dried fruit of your choosing

Almonds OR Pecans

EGG

Whole Milk

Heavy Cream

And if you would like for dipping-

Blackberry jam

To the extent i understand this is kinda like hardtack from the bri'ish military, but a fantastical version of it that actually tastes really good. Hardtack was a military provision with the texture of a brick that took a long time to spoil and could be easily carried with soldiers. So the texture we're going for is super dense, packed full with nuts and fruits (haha just lik-), but perhaps not that dense. We want something closer to a dog biscuit than actual tack.

I remembered something about corn being mentioned, thankfully the wiki clarified that no actually the british just referred to any grain as corn back in the day. Thank Fuck! Although I would like to try a version of this using masa in the future.

AND, “what does Lembas taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

Took a few tries but eventually got it perfectly chewy and dense

The raisins cook-in like little beads of flavortown sweetness

Cant speak for other fruits but for dried apple it softened up nicely, kinda matching the raisins in the end

Im a big pecan slut, pecans fuck on anything especially here. Crumble them on top after you coat the dough with the egg-mixture for some visual appeal

Somewhat flakey outside

The jam was my idea, it was nice but might be too sweet for some tastes

Would pair very well with a kiwi flavored drink

Or mead

I can see why this would a travelling provision. Its both sugary (a good thing when expending energy) and filling (also a good thing when youre travelling) while not being overwhelming with flavor (if youre prone to motion sickness. Horse sickness? Do get motion sickness on horses?)

Its like how if you're going hiking you want a good mix of sugars and salts, to balance your intake of water.

. If you wanna make it like the illustrations or the movie, use a cookie cutter for either triangles or squares . If you don't have a cookie cutter, an apple cutter also works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . try to keep the board you'll roll the dough out onto chilled before you use it, it seems better for the texture of the food though i dont entirely know why

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So from beginning to end, it took about an hour and half for the first attempt. Down to about 40 minutes for the second attempt. These are a real simple recipe because its not like a croissant where the margin for error is nonexistent. Middle-earth be damned my boy can work a grill.

I'd recommend storing in a tubberware container, but if you're deadset on using leaves please rinse and dry them first, and wrap the bread in either wax paper or saran wrap underneath. We dont have mallorn leaves in real life (as far as we know) but most salad greens should work, or as Marie Porter says (linked in the reblogs!) a banana leaf.

I really enjoyed the process of making this recipe, itd be really easy to batch-bake these en masse, and the process of eating said recipe. Like all jokes aside, i think this would be a great substitute for trailmix. Its not going to get smushed and even if it breaks a bit it wont affect the taste. It wont keep you fed for a whole day but pair it with some pickles or a salty snack and yeah itll keep your motor running.

I give this recipe a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) Let me know if you think I got something wrong, or if you ran into issues with the recipe. We're off to a strong start, lads!

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

6 TBSP butter, chilled

2 cups self-rising flour

1 TBSP granulated sugar

½ cup raisins

½ other dried fruit (strawberry slices, oranges, etc.), chopped

Handful of almonds or pecans, chopped

1 egg, well beaten

½ cup whole milk

4 TBSP heavy cream

Method:

Preheat your oven to 400 f.

Cut the butter into slivers/small pieces. With your hands, combine the butter into the flour in a mixing bowl until the mixture resembles coarse sand.

Chop your dried nuts and dried fruit until it feels right.

Mix in the sugar, raisins, nut, and dried fruit of your choosing

In a seperate bowl, beat the egg until combined, and then mix in the milk until combined. Keep a bit of this mixture to brush the tops of the bread.

Stir while adding the egg/milk mixture and the heavy cream into the flour. Mix just until combined into a soft dough.

Knead the dough until firm on a floured surface.

Roll into a half inch thickness and cut with a square or leaf shaped cookie cutter. (...or in my case, an apple corer).

Place on a lightly greased baking sheet, with about an inch of space between each piece. Brush the tops of the lembas with some of the mixture you saved earlier.

Bake for about 15-20 minutes, or until it turns a soft gold and the inside is chewy.

#cross cooks lotr #lord of the rings #tolkien #lotr art

[solacryptid]

Unexpected Fate

INHERITANCE CYCLE (ERAGON) AND LOTR CROSSOVER. VILANSIA AND HER DRAGON, SVELLEVARINA, HAVE SPENT MANY YEARS TRAINING YOUNG DRAGON RIDERS ALONGSIDE ERAGON AND SAPHIRA. BUT, THEIR TIME OF ADVENTURE HAS COME. THE PEOPLE OF MIDDLE EARTH HAVE CALLED FOR AID AND ALAGAESIA WILL ANSWER

Chapter 10: The Breaking of the Fellowship

The predictable forest landscape along the river bank was interrupted the following day around mid-afternoon by two grand statues on either side of the river. They were much larger than even Saphira herself. Stern expressions were carved into their faces, both of them holding out their hands before them, palms facing us as if motioning those who may oppose them to halt in their presence. Gimli looked on in amazement, no doubt admiring the stonework. Stone crowns were structured atop their heads.

"The Argonath," Legolas informed me. "They are the kin of Aragorn,"

While it was hard to discern a likeness to Aragorn at such a low vantage point, there was no doubt that they all held ancient energy about them. The statues exuded power and strength, something that the ranger was quiet about showing to others. The Argonath marked the point at which the river entered a large lake, the blue water expanding in front of us. The crashing of a waterfall echoed across the waterfront.

Aragorn signaled ahead of us to pull up onto the river bank once we reached the lake, each of our canoes pushing onto the rocky riverside.

"We cross the lake at nightfall," Aragorn told us. "Hide the boats and continue on foot. We approach Mordor from the North,"

"Oh, yes?" Gimli questioned. "Just a simple matter of finding our way through Emyn Muil...an impassible labyrinth of razor-sharp rocks! And after that, it gets even better. Festering, stinking marshland as far as the eye can see,"

Aragorn paused in unpacking his canoe, an eyebrow raised. "That is our road. I suggest you take some rest and recover your strength, Master Dwarf,"

"Recover my-"Gimli grumbled in disbelief. "Recover strength? Pay no heed to that, young Hobbit,"

Pippin did not seem too concerned with Aragorn's friendly jab.

Svellevarina drew my attention to her, her scales sparkling from the water droplets that clung to them. "While the company rests here I will do some hunting. I won't go far, there is plenty of fish within the lake,"

"Very well. Do not close your mind completely to me,"

She nudged my shoulder once before jumping into the air, the wind from her wings rustling our clothes and shifting the canoes slightly. I watched her skim the surface of the water in search of fish, her senses focused on the hunt. I turned away after a moment, leaving her be.

Merry and Pippin snacked on a portion of the lembas bread provided to us by Lady Galadriel with Gimli, taking full advantage of the time we had on the shore. I helped Sam set up a small cooking fire, waiting until he had set up small sticks in a pointed, circular formation before snapping my fingers together to reveal small sparks. The Hobbits watched in awe as I snapped my fingers again, releasing the magic towards the deadfall and allowing it to catch fire.

"The word for fire in the ancient language is brisingr," I told them. Pippin began chanting the word under his breath, trying his best to commit it to memory. "Take heart, that is no easy spell for beginner magicians,"

Sam leaned against a large boulder behind him, crossing his arms tight against him as he shut his eyes for a quick rest as he waited for the fire to reach proper cooking temperature.

Merry sat up from where he sat next to Pippin. "Where's Frodo?"

Sam's eyes snapped open as he scrambled onto his feet. As I looked, I noticed that both he and Boromir were nowhere in sight. I extended my mind in search of the Hobbit, but his mind was shielded from me, preventing me from finding him. I cursed myself for not maintaining surveillance. I was able to find Boromir, who was deep within the forest.

"Remain here," Aragorn said. "I will go after him," he ran into the woods, a hand resting on the hilt of his weapon.

I felt Legolas' unease rise, causing certain stress of my own. I reached out to Svellevarina, making sure that she was not too far.

The clang of metal swords colliding suddenly echoed throughout the forest, the sound easily reaching my pointed ears. There was no hesitation in Legolas as he ran into the forest after the ranger towards the sound of fighting. Gimli gathered his axe in his hands before joining the Elf.

I reached out to Svell, urging her to fly as fast as she possibly could. She acknowledged my request and I felt her drawing closer. I faced the three Hobbits, their faces scared. I knelt before them, making sure they paid attention to what I told them.

"It is imperative that you remain here. Hide if you must but do not go into the forest after us. We will return once everything is safe. Do you understand?" They nodded their heads but said nothing. "It will be okay, little ones," I stood up, letting a wave of ease wash over them from me. I noticed their shoulder relax ever so slightly before I turned and sprinted into the trees toward the sound of clanging metal and yells. The leaves that made up the treetops rustled from the wind of Svellevarina as she flew above me, following closely.

I entered a clearing in the forest where a stone structure was built on the hill, stone steps leading to a flat elevated surface. The three other members of the company were already present, fighting off the coming onslaught of orcs. Boromir, however, was not in sight, though I still sensed that he was still alive. I unsheathed my rider weapon, holding it out before me as I released a battle cry, plunging myself into the crowd of orcs. They were considerably taller than the creatures we fought in the Mines of Moria, their strength instantly noticeable. It presented a challenge, even for my speed and experience, as their thick armour proved more difficult to slice through. I made sure to take aim for areas of skin that were exposed.

With a snarl, an orc swung its weapon at my head. I ducked, swinging my blade from the left side in an arc to the right, sinking it deep into the back of its knees. I pulled the sword towards my chest, slicing through. It shrieked, falling to the ground as blood gushed out

Svellevarina roared, causing the fighting to pause as she dived down into the crowd of orcs, swinging her tail as she landed, sending those nearest her tumbling into the air. She snapped up a few in her jaws, snapping them in two as she bit down, her teeth having no trouble in piercing their armour.

"Find the halfling!" One of the orcs bellowed. "Find the halfling!"

A portion of the orcs bypassed us, running into the woods in search of Frodo. Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli ran after them as I remained next to my dragon, taking on the orcs that attempted to join those that made it into the forest. A droplet of sweat ran down my forehead, and I drew upon the energy within the sparkling opal that rested within the hilt of my weapon. I extended my left hand as I cast a spell, the orcs closest to me dropping to the ground as their life left them, the remaining energy flowing into the gem on my weapon.

The sound of a horn resounded through the forest. I paused, turning towards the sound. I extended my mind to check on the status of the company. Fear and panic ripped through me. Boromir was in grave danger, and he wasn't alone. Somehow Merry and Pippin were both with him.

I ran into the forest as Svellevarina blocked the path of the orcs to me. I used my magic to kill any orcs that crossed my path as I raced towards Boromir's energy. I made it to where Legolas and Gimli were fighting an aggregation of orcs, Legolas was now making use of his daggers, his quiver of arrows empty. I swung my blade at an oncoming orc, the bloodied sword landing with a thud in its side. I pulled, letting it cut open the creature's flesh. It continued coming, thrusting it's angled weapon towards my chest. I jumped out of the way, the tip of the weapon just grazing above my collar bone near my shoulder. I hissed, clenching my teeth at the sting of the cut, extending my blade forward to stab through the orc's back. With a snarl, the orc's life left him, my weapon piercing its heart.

I gasped, as I clutched at my chest, a great pain ripping through me. I turned with my hand on my chest, looking around me. I turned, taking in the sight of Boromir further down the hill as an arrow stuck out from his chest. With a twang another arrow was released, landing in the man's stomach. He paused for only a moment before he kept on fighting, swinging at the orcs that neared him. I felt the fear of the Merry and Pippin as they watched Boromir defend them. I blocked my mind from Boromir's pain, charging forward in an attempt to reach him. Aragorn managed to first, though, taking on the orc that fired the arrows. Gimli had taken to wrestling an orc on the ground, beheading the creature with his axe. I continued to fight through the orcs, a group of them making it past Boromir and towards Merry and Pippin, sweeping them up off the ground and carrying them away. I yelled, releasing my energy to the orcs that were left here, using my magic to snap all of their necks. As they crumbled to the ground, I too fell on my knees. Boromir had fallen, three arrows protruding from his torso. Aragorn was at his side, his hand clasped tightly with Boromir's. I could feel Svellevarina's concern through our connection.

"I would have followed you, my brother, my captain, my king," Boromir said breathlessly to Aragorn. He choked slightly on his breath before his eyes focused on the trees that grew above him. His life left him at that moment, his grip on Aragorn's hand going limp.

"Be at peace, son of Gondor," Aragorn said softly before kissing his forehead. "They will look for his coming at the White Tower, but he will not return,"

Legolas stepped forward to help Aragorn carry him back towards the river. Gimli and I followed them until we reached the river bank, where Svellevarina met us. I stood next to her, relying on her for emotional strength. Boromir's body was laid within one of the canoes, his sword placed on his chest within his grip. Aragorn placed his broken horn within the canoe as well. We stood for a moment in silence before he pushed the canoe out onto the water where it was carried towards the waterfall. Svellevarina lifted her head to the sky, releasing a mournful roar. I offered a blessing for his soul, providing whatever guidance he may need to the gods that his people believed in.

Legolas grabbed hold of the remaining canoe. "Hurry! Frodo and Sam have reached the Eastern shore,"

I looked out across the lake to see the second canoe on the river bank. I could feel both Sam and Frodo, their intentions clear to me then.

Upon noticing that none of us had moved to join him, Legolas looked back to Aragorn. "You mean not to follow them,"

"Frodo's fate is no longer in our hands," Aragorn said simply.

"Then this has all been in vain," Gimli said beside me. He hung his head. "The Fellowship has failed,"

"Not if we hold true to each other," Aragorn replied, looking to each of us. "We will not abandon Merry and Pippin to torment and death, not while we have strength left. Leave all that can be spared behind, we travel light," His expression changed to one of fierce determination. "Let us hunt some orc,"

Gimli grinned wickedly. "Yes!"

Aragorn hoisted his pack over his shoulder, then took off into the forest. Gimli was quick to follow him, his grip on his bloodied axe tight.

I took a moment to ensure that the saddlebags were secured in place before wiping the gore from my weapon. I returned it to its sheath on my hip, looking out to the waterfall. My heart was heavy with loss. To feel the life leave Boromir was something no amount of training could have prepared me for. I leaned against Svell's side as I shuddered. The images of what occurred only moments before flashing before my eyes. The terror in the Hobbit's eyes as they were carried away. Oh, gods, they did not deserve this.

"Vilansia," Svellevarina said gently. "Come, we must go after them to prevent whatever danger awaits them,"

To be overcome with emotion was something I had never experienced before. Despite my Elvish nature, I could not find the words to communicate with my dragon and instead let my feelings speak for me. I felt her surprise for a moment before she forced her calm to wash over me.

A hand on my shoulder forced my attention to the world around me again. Legolas stood in front of me, concern clear on his face.

"We mustn't tarry, Vilansia," he said gently.

"Eka kenna," I replied, my voice brittle. I cleared my throat, forcing my shoulders back. "My apologies, Legolas. Come, let us catch up with the others,"

He paused a moment, giving me a knowing look. "There is no shame in having grief. This is a dark moment for the Fellowship," He looked up to Svell as if saying something to her as well. "Do not carry your sorrow with you, as there is hope yet," He squeezed my shoulder slightly before letting his hand fall back to his side. He smiled slightly, extending his left arm out to his side, gesturing for me to take to lead and catch up with the other two.

I swallowed thickly, letting Svellevarina's calm settle within me. I gave a determined nod, my jaw clenched and began to jog into the woods after the remainder of the Fellowship, Legolas close behind me. Svellevarina took to the air, remaining as close as possible to us. Boromir gave his life to protect Merry and Pippin. I would not allow his death to be in vain.

------

Translations from the Ancient Language:

Brisingr - Fire

Eka kenna - I know

------

next chapter

#LOTR #lord of the rings #LOTR Crossover #lotr fanfiction #lotr fanfic #lotr eragon crossover #Eragon #eragon crossover #eragonfanfic #inheritance cycle #inheritence cycle #Crossover fanfiction #crossover fanfic #legolas #legolas greenleaf #legolas x oc #oc x legolas #slow burn #friends to lovers #mutual feelings #mutual pining #Requited Love #requited feelings #original characters #thanks for reading!

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

#ACLA24 #ACLA24Leaders #youtube #youtube video #climate leaders #climate solutions #climate action #climate and environment #climate #climate change #climate and health #climate blog #climate justice #climate news #weather and climate #environmental news #environment #environmental awareness #environment and health #environmental #environmental issues #environmental justice #environment protection #environmental health #Youtube

[kyyshobbies]

No clue how tumblr works but im willing to give it a shot!

♡ ︎꒦꒷lets be moots꒷꒦♡

꒰ ⊹ ˚ . intro 𖧧 ७

Hello! I’m Kayla/Kyy! I go by any pronouns but prefer she/her pronouns. I’m in my early 20s and I'm pansexual :D I’m engaged to my fiancé who puts up with all my shenanigans. I also got some of the “tism” so my interests and hobbies are endless! I’ll probably make separate posts for each of my interests.

꒰ ⊹ ˚ . hobbies 𖧧 ७

❥ reading

❥ writing

❥ embroidery / cross-stitch

❥ baking

❥ cooking

❥ photography

❥ journaling / flower pressing

❥ foraging / collecting

❥ light gaming

꒰ ⊹ ˚ . interests 𖧧 ७

❥fantasy (lotr, harry potter, skyrim)

❥Axe throwing/collecting

❥ music (kpop,alt rock, indie rock, metal)

❥ Witchcraft + Paganisim

❥Shifting/DR

#hobbies #new to tumblr #idk how to tag stuff #lets be moots

[bloomymama]

Here is my introduction post! My name is Rachel. I am 30 years old on November 10th. 🫣 I am married to my partner and have been with them for nearly 9 years. We had our son on New Years Day this year. I love motherhood! I graduated with my Bachelor's Degree last December and plan on going back to graduate school for my Master's in Social Work. I have two cats (siblings) Tuxedo Mask and Sailor Gabby, and a hedgehog named Avocado.

As far as my interests go, I'm really into:

✻ the sims ✻ persona series

✻ writing/rping ✻ pokemon

✻ coral island ✻ coffee

✻ cooking/baking ✻ legend of zelda

✻ hm/sos series ✻ rune factory

✻ horror genre ✻ crafting

✻ true crime ✻ astrology

✻ tarot/crystals ✻ resident evil

✻ otome games ✻ animal crossing

✻ pikmin ✻ marvel

✻ LOTR ✻ sailor moon

✻ demon slayer ✻ korean dramas

✻ studio ghibli

#introducing myself #hello world

[kmartmithril]

Excuse me while I make an “About me” post to pin to the ole blog

Hi! I’m Bex! I’m 29, Ace, and just here for a good time. I’ve been off and on tumblr since about 2012, having had multiple blogs in that time and this is the most current one. I enjoy a lot of different content/media and general don’t tag things unless it’s spoiler related. If you need me to tag something for whatever reason, I will happily do so!!!

This is my Twitter so there will be posts sprinkled throughout that’s me literally just throwing spaghetti at the wall. I also talk in the tags a lot because I don’t want to intrude on anyone’s actual post.

You can support me through my Ko-fi! There’s no real structure to it yet, but I will share my art there from time to time❤️

Here’s some random facts about me

- D&D, BG3, Dropout, Art, fashion, history, LOTR, Kpop, Zelda games, Animal Crossing, Star Wars, Star Trek, nature, historic costuming, theater, occasionally anime/manga, general fantasy and sci-fi, music & more will appear on this blog.

- Aspiring writer with a million and one ideas

- Dream job is voice acting

- my go to coffee order is an iced oat milk vanilla latte

- I have an 11 year old tabby cat named Annabel who is the love of my life and I will absolutely share pictures of her

- I love food! I love all kinds of food and love to cook. My favorites include Japanese, Korean, Italian and Mexican. I am always open to trying new things and learning how to cook various foods

- I’ve been singing since I was three and have taken voice lessons off and on, including a year of opera vocal training

- I draw and paint! I mostly do traditional mediums, with alcohol markers, acrylic paint and watercolors being some of my favorite mediums

- I have a degree in theater and worked at various theaters around the US. Some of my favorite plays I’ve ever worked on are Shakespeare ones

- the Lord of the Rings trilogy is one of my favorite pieces of media hands down. I have two different copies of the trilogy (both gifts from my mother) and reread them when I’m in a tough spot. I also own a replica of the sword Sting and want to get Andúril as well

- I have four tattoos

- I taught myself how to do the Perry the Platypus noise from Phineas in Ferb after seeing the show as a child

[tvguidancecounselor]

TV Guidance Counselor Episode 528: Mary Kate Wiles

April 13-19, 2009

This week Ken welcomes actor (The Fairly Odd Parents: Fairly Odder on Paramount+, The Lizzie Bennet Diaries), Shipwrecked Comedy member, producer, writer and natural blonde Mary Kate Wiles to the show.

Ken and Mary Kate discuss growing up in Arkansas, being in the closet, living in Los Angeles, second choices, being engaged to somebody from Marblehead, how 2009 feels like yesterday, Amy Poehler, Parks and Rec, living in the sticks, when cool stuff comes to your hometown after you leave, culture shock, how small the world is now, watching stuff with your Mom growing up, being a PBS only kid by edict, missing Nicktoons, Sex and the City, Bones, faking it with novelizations, from blonde to redhead to blonde, all the weddings on TV, Scrubs, things Ken has never seen, The Office, American Idol, TV Guide's Sexiest Stars Party, celebrity weight loss, Surviving Suburbia with Bob Saget, Model Behavior, cooking shows, America's Next Top Model, weird reality show challenges, Hell's Kitchen, Gordon Ramsey, Will and Grace, Lost, Ken's constant and annoying recommendations of Fringe, The Middle, how Lord of the Rings inspired Mary Kate to act, having your body scanned to be in Grand Theft Auto V, Halloweentown, super weird creepy Prayer Crosses, Lara Croft Tomb Raider, Just the Ten of Us, Ken's thoughts on Wandavision, the MCU, Toy Biz, Forgotten Silver, not recommending Meet the Feebles to a LOTR Peter Jackson Fan, pageants, and how bizarre TV Land's "The Cougar" was.