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15-lizards · 1 year

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ASOIAF American highschool AU bc I want them to suffer

-Jon is that guy you see in the hall all the time and he’s super cute but then you talk to him and he’s just. The most pretentious asshole you’ve ever met. He’s better than you bc he takes AP classes btw. And he’s on the basketball team but he’s brooding so he barely has any friends

-Dany is a little FREAK ugh I love her. She’s a GSA officer and wears weird clothes and cat ears to school and everyone makes fun of her but she’s the nicest person ever. Very passionate ab her special interests. super smart too like no one can say that she isn’t top of class

-Sansa is the nice popular religious girl who likes to make cookies for people. She’s like condescending nice though and is sweet to the losers mostly out of pity. Obsessed with Loras in a comphet way to cover her real crush on Margaery. She is on the swim team and loves to run the student council like the navy

-Arya is on the soccer and basketball team. Slightly to weird to be popular but too cool to be a loser. Kind of disruptive in class but it’s okay bc she’s funny. Definition of a low maintenance girl. Cuts her hair short and likes the way she looks in a sports bra and baggy clothes but has yet to find out what non-binary is

-Robb Homecoming King football captain you get the gist. Sincerely nice and is the one jock who’s on good terms with literally everyone in his classes. Tries his best to defend Jon (it is so hard) Has dated around but his most intense relationship is with his drug dealer burnout bestie Theon. They get jealous when the other starts dating a girl (both of them have yet to find out what bisexualism is)

-Joffrey is a grade A bitchass. He’s on the soccer or lacrosse team only because Cersei bribed the coach. No one really likes him but they hang around him anyway because he has a sick ass house and his moms hot. Thinks he’s smarter than he actually is, maintains a C- average

-Bran is that freshman you only see in khaki shorts and graphic t-shirts about bugs or some shit. Completely lives in his own world (autism slay!) and has trouble interacting with other kids. Besties with Meera and Jojen tho who just get him. Reads big ass philosophy books in his spare time

-Aegon is Dany’s cooler cousin. He’s way more popular than Jon and the two have a one sided rivalry that Jon made up in his head. Pretty nice to other people but he thinks he is such hot shit. His superiority complex is kinda crazy

-Theon graduated last year but still hangs around campus. Goes to Robb’s football games and sells drugs under the stands. “Where’s my hug at” guy. Drives a beat up Honda civic that’s on its last legs. Has multiple misdemeanors on his record. Robb thinks he can fix him

-Loras is Robb’s teammate who’s also mister popular. Already has a scholarship to a D1 school and is every teachers favorite (he takes advantage of this to skip class). Smart but doesn’t really try that hard in class. A classic DL gay guy who is in a situationship with grad student Renly after lying about his age on grindr

-Davos is everyone’s favorite History or English teacher. Gets invested in the students wellbeing. Gay kids LOVE him, he never can have a lunch period to himself those kids who are looking for a father figure are always eating lunch in his classroom. Has a loving wife and kids but is down bad for the eternally suffering Vice Principal Stannis

-Robert is the football coach and in most American schools you have to be a teacher to be a coach so he probably teaches health or sex Ed or some shit. Half asses his classes so he can go over film with his football players instead. You can hear him yelling from across campus. He is so loud

-Stannis is the vice principal who absolutely no one likes except Davos. Even the teachers don’t respect him. Has wanted to be principal for years but keeps getting fucked over by administration. Wants to move to a different school district so he can get a pay raise but the sexy Spanish teacher Mel is trying to convince him to blackmail the school board instead

-Tywin the principal. Used to be a AP US history or AP economics teacher but then discovered that he hated kids so he bullied and bribed his way into the principal position. Kids run when they hear him in the hallway with his walkie talkie crackling and his keys jangling. Lets Joffrey get away with everything bc he’s the principals grandson

-Cersei as the head of the school board. Always shoveling funds to her kids school instead of any of the other ones in the school district. Probably is in some sort of tax evasion or bribery scandal that Tywin is trying to cover up. Number one passive aggressive hater on Facebook

#ASOIAF shitposting #based on my experiences in an American public highschool #real dark days ages 14-17 were #time to project

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elendsessor · 11 months

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I am a predictable bitch and I would like to hear your Demifiend and Raidou headcanons if possible

YES

demifiend -

childhood friends with chiaki and isamu and were all a bunch of delinquents. also a city boy at heart.

and yes all three of them used to believe they would be best friends forever :”)

never got into fights on campus nor was the one to instigate any but did fight back.

did have a crush on chiaki for awhile.

seriously heartbroken over everything and everyone he knew and loved dying but after learning about how his besties were turning into pieces of shit he didn’t want to return everything back to the way it was.

rejected every reason and has to live with the consequences but still complains. though lucifer was definitely not happy with hitoshura for it he didn’t off him in hopes that he could get some use out of him one day. this does not stop hitoshura from trying to fistfight him.

despite taking up luci’s offer to become a true demon seeming like the best option he did opt out. he’s scared of losing what little humanity he has left.

hates being called a demon but will only call himself such if it benefits him.

local demon bug eater got so used to it real world insects now look appetizing.

after becoming the demifiend he decided to ditch the name naoki since he felt it didn’t fit. still hates hearing it in most cases.

while demons in nocturne suck ass he’s pretty chill with them. talks with them often and grew popular in the vortex world for a multitude of reasons. he may be doomed to live there but at least he’s got decent word of mouth.

of course pixie’s his favorite. she was the chiaki replacement. seriously she reminds him so much of her hitoshura sometimes accidentally mixes their names up. they gossip a ton too.

raidou -

there’s not a ton of info out there on how the yatagarasu treats their summoners but based on dialogue, remarks, etc. they’re really harsh on them. you gotta be willing to give up your entire life if you want to be in their good books. unfortunately raidou was no different. his entire life was planned out for him, he was homeschooled and sheltered, also never had a proper family to speak of.

only ended up going to school as a cover. he’s older than his peers but got stuck as a first year and keeps getting held there. doing his job takes up so much of his time he barely ever attends class or does homework but he is an intelligent guy.

even after the day he stopped going altogether he kept the hat and the student get up. it was oddly comforting.

yes he wears his hat all the time but not because he’s secretly bald or anything. actually he has the world’s worst hat hair and gave up trying to fix it. very ashamed of it though.

has always had a soft spot for cats so having gouto in his life was a massive plus. gouto’s temporary “death” in dsrk1 hit him hard though so he makes it even more of a point to keep him around. every morning he goes out and feeds/plays with the random cats in tsukudo-cho.

absolute workaholic because that’s all he knows how to do. constantly picks up odd jobs when there’s nothing going on, always willing to help out the capital’s residents.

of course he unfortunately neglects his health a lot, occasionally on purpose as self-discipline. he passes out on the job, comes back injured, forgets to eat, etc. it’s become both gouto and narumi’s job to look after him since he certainly isn’t going to do it himself. this has sparked a few one-sides arguments (because raidou also really doesn’t like fighting with them). all in all they’re an awkward found family.

has a good bond with his demons at least, but it’s the equivalent of looking after a bunch of unruly kids sometimes.

does talk with tae about mythology but that’s as social as he gets with anyone.

yes he’s popular with many ladies but all of it flies over his head, that and the occasional comments about him looking gay. he is gay though but he’s also bad at picking up on it.

bonus raishura hcs because they’re like my comfort ship at this point -

raidou never liked the idea of hurting people and the same goes for anyone under demon influence. hitoshura appeared to just be another case of that sort of thing which is why he never got to complete the task of killing him. ending up vouching for him, too, which steadily evolved into a weird friendship.

initially hitoshura went through the labyrinth of amala for curiosity’s sake, only entering the fifth because dante/raidou were down there and he didn’t want them to go any deeper in. for raidou in particular he does feel especially guilty having indirectly landing him in that situation. literally the only sane human being somehow existing in the vortex world of course he’s gonna care. (yeah as long as you don’t fully complete the fifth kalpa you can get any of the other endings i tested this so this hc does work.)

hitoshura made it a point to not get attached to people ever again. his alliance with raidou was one he wanted to be temporary but he did start genuinely caring for him.

both of them are bad at being social and dealing with feelings so their interactions are super awkward. they do like being close to one another and cuddling though. it started as odd coping mechanisms and curiosity but they started giving themselves little to no space without noticing.

eventually hitoshura found it too hard to be separated from him despite keeping in touch so he ended up doing enough convincing to live with raidou. it benefitted both of them and was really supposed to be a continuation of their initial partnership/friendship but they started getting more and more intimate.

they acknowledge one another as boyfriends but don’t openly say it. a lot of their relationship is kept behind closed doors.

again a lot of their overall relationship is awkward as hell they’re really bad at being in love.

#shantien rambles #asks #headcanon hell

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borderline-off-fangame · 1 year

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ababa random things about the game that makes me go a.

-Little Sam is actually a recycled character from a very old creepypasta I made back in the ye olde days of.. 2010-2012. the story was called ‘the girl with a plush toy’ (original i know), I hated that story and after I left the fandom, I ended up changing the character. So she became Sam!

-Max’s original concept was that he was the adoptive child of Enoch with the ability to transform into whatever being he so desired using a mask he would craft. I forgor about that concept until later on when I found my old stash of art. I might use that concept for someone else haha.

-Aleyes is based on a nightmare I had when I was young. From what I recall, the nightmare was like a movie or some shit, and it had some.. really wacky visuals, with the last thing I see before waking up crying my ass off was a wall of eyes. And that is how Aleyes was born.

-Human Seneca’s original variant had a lazy/fixed eye which faced right-side up, was also blind in that one eye. That design was a nod at the original Seneca sprite which had a very big gap between the eyes.

Which meant that even his human form was not spared from deformity. Of course that was later changed to make him appear.. a little bit normal, but malnourished regardless.

-Max’s birthday is April 23rd, he happens to share the same birthday as Sam.

-Gabriel’s original design was suppose to be a N. Fowleri variant, a humanoid variant of the brain eating amoeba created for.. well.. overthrowing humanity ofc. that was changed during the remake, where Gabriel is now a golem variant, and the N. Fowleri variant was given to Gabi. Both of them are quite self-aware, and they can exist in the same universe without a paradox occurring.

-While Max’s gender is up for interpretation (even at one point there was a theory that max had klinefelter syndrome), it’s obv known that he’s very gay for his boyfriend Puff. They have been together for almost 2 years in-game.

-In the future, Max and Puff are adoptive parents to 2 kiddos named April and June.

-Teen/Adult variant of Sam is a prodigy in music, her favorite instrument is the piano.

-Aleyes’ human variant (the one with the flesh hair) is loosely inspired from the Greek mythology of Medusa, which makes him the first character with moving hair (second is Mariam)

-Shedder’s original design happened to share an uncanny resemblance to another character from another fangame which I won’t mention (the ye olde design is changed a little bit and appears in the game), the second design was drawn by a friend after we were brainstorming for a potential design, and then Chii came in and slapped my ass with a fresh looking design.

In order

First design, dubbed Copy Cat

Second design, now dubbed Covetous

Final design, now dubbed “The First One”

concept art

The Shedder concept now spans further than my mom’s lasagna, that an entire world exists revolving around said creatures. Won’t spoil it’s intentions doe.

-Seneca is probably romantically involved with @ethaclone’s Bug. in which he tries to woo the poor guy into going against his newfound friends at first. Luckily Max tells him to piss off.

-Since Aleyes is a notorious storage unit (and a parasite at that), it begs the question of whether he is able to eat or not... the answer is yes. He may look like a walking stomach, but he’s not greedy about food in the slightest. Nourishment is the least of his worries when he’s spending his time running away from Shedder and it’s Servants.

-Terrorizer was known as Rekt Rabbit (those were the wild years, don’t ask, also the excessive bass version of bones’ ok this is the last time was used as a battle track.. help). Still kept the name Erika. Ofc she was suppose to turn against Shedder, but in the remade version I made her entirely irredeemable.

-Melon head’s name is Orodemus, that name came out randomly from a follower a few years back, and looking up the meaning of the name doesn’t.. show anything. *shrug*

-Despite Emily’s anxious appearance and personality, she can be very cunning, using her sweet talk as means to take advantage of any situation she befalls in.

-Orchid was originally to be named Hepatica (named after a flower) but changed it to Orchid last minute. In both switches and the pictures, it shows her original name which I cannot bother changing without messing something up in-game, and I am NOT in the mood for that. I also changed Roosevelt’s name, as he was originally named James Rose. He still retains his flowery tails.

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nightcolorz · 3 years

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Poorly describing my versions of the Gotham rogues:

Joker: “yolo” in its most dangerous form, def is writing a slow burn enemies to loves fic about him and Batman. Gay and homophobic 💯 The other rogues don’t invite him to pride celebrations anymore cause he’ll keep calling people slurs “as a joke”. Him and Edward have longterm beef, like schoolgirl levels of petty drama.

Harley Quinn: would describe herself as a “girlboss” unironically while committing heinous crimes. tweeted “clowns aren’t funny” after breaking up with Joker (ended up causing a huge scandal). The OG “I can fix him” girl. Is sort of the rogues free underground therapist (god knows they need it) cause they can’t get professional help without being sent to Arkham.

Poison Ivy: Breaking News: Cottagecore lesbian commits mass murder cause her plant wilted. She’s what republicans think environmentalists are. Would get in a fist fight with that vegan teacher cause “plants have feelings too”. Has beef with most of the male rogues, supports ‘kill all men’ without realizing it’s a joke (she prefers ‘kill all humans’ but figured she had to downgrade because the Gotham city sirens are humans technically).

Cat Woman: “OH NO! It appears I’ve gotten stuck backwards in the bank vault step-Bat 😏😏😏😏😏😏, looks like I’m not stealing any more diamonds today 😰😩”. Mad respect for Selina, she just wants diamonds and bat dick, no tragic backstory or complex motivations needed. I personally like to headcanon her as wearing a straight up cat costume (ears and a tail like a true furry) cause it’s way funnier to imagine a sophisticated rich woman dressing up as a cat to steal shit than whatever bullshit DCs up to these days. Trans catgirl supremacy 💎👍

Scarecrow: That one guy who gets angry at people because “Halloween costumes are meant to be scary 🤬😡😑😒”. Doesn’t even attempt to express emotions, is the human embodiement of this emoji: 😐. His presence is more jarring than threatening, his intimidation levels are somehow underwhelming and overwhelming at the same time. The other rogues have collectively decided that he’s asexual under no assumption other than that they don’t want to imagine Jonathan having sex. Overtime Jonathan has become basically fearless (he smokes his own fear gas like vape just to feel something). Jonathan and Harley became good friends when they both worked in Arkham, their dynamic is surprisingly wholesome.

The Riddler: Didn’t get hugged enough as a child and is now making it everyone’s problem. Would hold a bank hostage to show Batman his third grade spelling bee medal. Is the only autistic rogue that gets accommodations in Arkham because he won’t stop bugging the guards. FTM trans ofc (his names Edward Nygma for Christ's sake). He ran away from home at seventeen and faked his own death (his deadname is legally dead lmao). Uses the terms “alpha, beta, and omega male” unironically.

Two Face: “Yeah, I mean, I didn’t wanna blow up the orphanage either, but Y’know the coin said-” The other rogues talk to Harvey as if he’s constantly at his breaking point, which is half true. Harv is a stone cold mf, he’s the rock that’s holding Two Face together tbh. Edward calls Harvey and Harv Jekyll and Hyde cause he’s that original. All the rogues have at least a sneaking suspicion that Bruce Wayne is batman and use Harvey as their little primary source (being ex besties and everything), until they find out Selina and Bruce are a thing of course. No matter how much evidence he’s faced with Harvey will never accept Bruce Wayne is batmam, he’s not ready to consider that one of the only positive people in his life has been duking it out with him this whole time.

Penguin: He’s the rest of the rogues chill gay gangster uncle I don’t make the rules. The iceberg lounge is like the Batman villain equivalent of The Central Perk from friends (aka: its their default place to hangout). Oswald always makes a fuss about them not making reservations ahead of them but at this point it’s just performative. Everyone’s 99% sure Oswald and Edward fucked at some point (Edward always makes a show of flustering Oswald when he needs a loan). Ossie always takes care of the others belongings when they’re in Arkham (he has a special place in his heart for Jonathan‘s crows).

The Mad Hatter: I love Jervis lmao he just really likes Alice in Wonderland and that’s a valid ass villain motivation 👍. One of the smartest rogues but doesn’t get enough credit because of how childish he is. He dresses in kids clothes, not just because he wants to but because he’s small af and can’t fit in shit. In public while the rogues are undercover Jervis usually wears a beanie or a baseball cap (he’d get spotted instantly if he wore his usual, but on bad days Jervis can’t bear to be without a hat). Jonathan and Jervis play chess a lot together in Arkham, and frequently engage in intellectual discussion, Edward tends to be a piss baby when Jon encourages him to do the same, he’s not ready to accept the reality that Jervis can match his intelligence.

Killer Croc: Waylon has a surprising amount in common with Jonathan, they share southern solidarity. He doesn’t travel out of the sewer often so the rogues will occasionally come to visit Waylon there (Edward always makes sure to complain loudly about the smell). Will show immense affection and loyalty to anyone who treats him as human (poor guy just needs a friend ☹️).

Mr Freeze: Literally just dead inside, someone give this poor bastard a hug. Victor stands as the most awkward rogue, he‘s sorta like the odd one out. The other rogues don’t interact with him that often because he’s sort of a party pooper. He’s the straight friend on thin ice, haha get it. Mr Freeze is my sisters favorite Batman villain because she thought the ice puns were funny in Batman in Robin, little does she know I’m embarrassing myself on tumblr in her glory.

Music Meister: So many of the Gotham rogues have horrible childhood trauma and Music Meister is just like “people bullied me for being a theater kid 😩😭💔😔”. In all honesty he’s iconic, in my au universe thingy I have him join the dork squad latter on and he sticks out like a sore thumb for a bit. I feel like him and Jervis would really hit it off though (mind control buddies, ha), although Jervis would always get him to sing Alice in Wonderland songs. In Arkham they have him wear a dog collar thingy and zap him when he sings, he gets bullied for that lol. anyways I’m sure I could make more of these, but it’s 2:20 am and my mind went blank. If y’all liked this I could always put more au headcanons out (I have A LOT)

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scorpionwins · 2 years

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Some Riverdale headcanons that no one can convince me aren't canon in a better reality:

Jughead:

Loves Jane Austen, - Pride and Prejudice especially

Dog person to the core but has fostered well over a hundred stray cats in his homeless days

Cuddle bug

Has a sweet tooth - the scene where he stole candy from the therapist makes my entire existence

Clothes thief - half of Veronica’s wardrobe is stuffed in that huge backpack. Archie is hoodieless and dramatic about it

Learned how to braid hair for JB

Doesn't speak sports. *Holds a football jersey* wow I love... Volleyball

Easy crier. Knows how to hide it well- I always thought he was sensitive to specific things. Physical pain? He can deal. Getting yelled at? Well, brace yourself cause you're getting a typhoon of tears

Really REALLY good cook- Pops would not let his honorary nephew walk around without knowing how to fry an egg

Cheryl and him were childhood best friends

Archie:

Big time smoker- I mean come on. Riverdale is stressful as hell. Who could blame the guy?

Doesn't smoke in front of Fred, tho cause he'll get his ass beat because he knows it upsets him

Had an Eminem phase. Wore baggy shirts, ate only spaghetti, and tried rhyming every sentence for a whole month before he got into Indie (or whatever the hell he's listening to cause imma be honest chief i forgot what genre he's supposed to like)

Not the most academically inclined but is weirdly really good at science? Can he do basic math? No. Can he build a whole iron man suit because he thought it looked cool? Yeah

Everyone assumes his favorite Avenger is Captain America but he doesn't like any of them. He loves the Punisher. Mr. Frank Castle was his bisexual awakening

Uncle Frank took him hunting when he was 5 and made him shoot a deer. He's hated camping every since

Adopted Cheryl when they were 10 during biology class. No one wanted to be her lab partner. From then on It's tradition they're seated together in every class

Actually really mean and funny

Veronica:

Cannot do taxes to save her life and doesn't know how to pay bills.

Knows New York by hand but gets lost in grocery stores

Really bad cook, - burn water and almost sets the house on fire trying to fry an egg type

Cat person but loves Vegas to death. Smithers helped her sneak in a baby kitten when she was 9, raised him ever since, and neither Hiram or Hermione noticed.

Scrunches her nose when confused/mad

Is a hoarder and very protective over items she deems as "sentimental relics"

Has a book club with Jughead. Every Friday night they gather at his and Archie's treehouse and argue over weather or not Lizzie Bennet is gay or bi

Archie singing her lullabies puts her to sleep IMMEDIATELY

Only likes being called "Ronnie" by her friends, family, s/o

Thinks of Fred as a father figure and calls him " Pa" like Archie does

She and Mary don't get along. Ronnie doesn't approve of her absence in her son's life and only inserting herself into Archie's narrative when she's obligated to

The Lodges have Uno game nights and whenever Hiram loses he raises a new disaster. Even so, Ronnie never lets him win

Sweet Pea:

Loves rom coms, cartoons, and Disney movies with a PASSION

DC person but dresses up as Bucky Barnes for Halloween. Every. Single. Year.

Has a personal vendetta againts shirts with sleeves

Artys boiii- has a secret sketchbook drowning in beautiful sketches of flowers, landscapes, and portraits of Toni, Joaquin and Fangs. The ones for Jughead he keeps in a stash under his pillow

HUUUGE momma's boy, - his mom's really tiny and sweet and no one can believe they're related. But then they see her punch his dad in the face and go oh so that's how-

Learned how to throw punches from his grandma. The brass knuckles are passed from generation to generation

Hates Star Wars??

Sweet Pea and Archie strangers to enemies to mortal enemies, 250k words, fastburn. These two see eachother in any situation and it's on sight

When the serpents stayed at the Andrews home he drew hyper realistic dicks on Archie's face when he was sleeping and no one told him to stop because it was funny

Jealous and possessive- not in an unhealthy way but he has the confidence of a soggy biscuit when in a relationship and insecurities make him act up

Sappy and romantic to boot (confirmed!!!)

#riverdale #jughead jones #archie andrews #veronica lodge #sweet pea #southside serpents #jarchie #varchie #jugpea #cheryl blossom #toni topaz #fangs fogarty #cheryl x toni #headcanons #text #text post

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black-rose-writings · 3 years

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I read Ruin and Rising because I’m bored

And I also hate myself

Like with the last book, I have a vague idea of the plot and stuff from tumblr and fanfics. I will also be refering to Darkling as Sasha for most of this.

I am still Darklina trash and don’t particularly like Mal.

On a different note, I’ve finally moved for college, but the internet here is trash, so I’ll probably have a lot more reading time now, since most games I play are online and will crash without internet.

Before

Cool story. Let’s hope Alina stays a badass.

Who am I joking, I know how this ends.

Chapter 1

So far so good. I hate the Apparat, per usual. Alina’s there basically dying and that bitch can’t wait to see her do so.

Cult leader to the core this one. He probably hates that his figurehead is alive and also not brainwashed.

Cult leader doesn’t like swearing. How surprising.

My boy David is completely right. What kind of irresponsible dingus keeps centuries old books in a fucking wet-ass cave? (Or a tree for that matter *cough cough* The Last Jedi *cough, cough*).

Genya is fun to be around.

Oh, shit, let’s go.

Chapter 2

Jesus Christ, Alina, Zoya isn’t that bad.

This is one hell of a shitshow.

I live for this version of Alina. Badass. Scary. I want more of this Alina.

Chapter 3

Out of all the random little details from crappy smut fics, I did not expect Oncat to be from the books, lol.

Mal actually has a supernatural tracking ability. Like, literally, they put a bug into the pouch with gunpowder so he could make the shot. I guess this was kinda said before, but never this directly, right?

Alina’s merzost-skyping Sasha now, yay.

Alina is horny for Sasha boy. Yay.

Alina canonically has a praise kink. Nice.

I hate LB with all of my heart at this very moment. How dare she bait us Darklina people like this? How DARE she? (Shipbaiting is the worst, seriously.)

Yes, yes, yes. These two lines. That’s what their relationship is all about. They’re each others foils, the yin to the other’s yang and... ugh. I am Darklina trash to the core and this hurts.

Darklina: You have a terrible taste in men.

Alina: I liked you once.

My boy Sasha walked into that one.

Chapter 4

Alina is a Queen. And we love her.

David, my beloved, my spirit animal.

It’s surprising they can read it at all, given it’s been centuries. Have you ever tried reading medieval manuscripts?

Honestly, with a father that crazy, it’s no wonder Baghra’s a bitch. And I’ve seen it said somewhere that the books imply Ilya’s experiments are what caused Baghra to be a shadow summoner and you know what? I can see how you’d make that connection.

Why is there so few Tidemakers in the books? Waterbenders are useful. I want more waterbenders.

Alina picking up some habits from Baghra I see.

Ah, yes, we love an educated giant.

I’m starting to think Harshaw is a bit nuts.

Shut up, Hershey. Or at least share the weed with the class. I’m not here for this “He’s mean to you because he likes you”. I might believe that in like, elementary school, but yall are (more or less) adults. Jesus.

Well, that was a bombshell of a twist.

Chapter 5

Oh boy, we’ve got some trauma bonding for out merry band of misfits. Yay.

Adrik has a crush on Zoya. And she hates it, lol. Cut the kid some slack, he’s like 15 or something.

That reminds me, I have a four-leaf clover pressed in books from close to year and a half ago. Time flies.

They’re really diving into the Mal has supernatural powers, huh?

Ghosts, let’s go.

Alina “I’m so happy to be outside I start to shine like a fucking fairy” Starkov and Mal is entranced. He’s definitelly nicer now. I’m not forgiving him for all the shit he’s pulled before and for using the silent treatment way too much, but hey, at least he’s improving.

I am not a Zoyalina person, but like... gay? Please? Rivals to grudging allies to friends to lovers, 300k slowburn? Sounds more fun than whatever Mala dn Alina have going on, lol.

(I’m starting to realize I’m not as much a Darklina person as I am anti-Malina person, lol. Like, literally everyone has a more interesting dynamic with Alina than tracker boy over there. Malina is at best boring AF and at worst toxic, codependent and emotionally abusive, while also being boring AF at the same time. It has literally nothing going for it except God herself liking it).

I can see why Nadia is gay in the show. The book version of her definitelly has a crush on Tamar. Homegirl likes a woman, who can murder her with the flick of her wrist and honestly? Same.

Alina has some big “coming out of lockdown after a year” energy atm.

The cat is one of the most realistic characters in this thing, lol.

And since Tamar is also heavily queercoded, our lovely ladies make off into the night, flirting. Or maybe not. Let me dream, though.

At least Blade Boy is aware that his tattoo is stupid. To quote someone ranting about him on tumblr: He’s embracing his identity as a tool.

Oh, boy, this will be fun.

Evil soldier is horny for Mal. Saints, is there a woman in this book who isn’t horny for Blade Boy?

And here comes Niki to save the day.

Chapter 6

Niki saved the day.

Fiberglass? And David being David. Genya being in love with her nerd of a boyfriend.

Jesus Christ, this one crazy kid has moved the technology in this universe a whole century on his own. So, when is David going to propose to him?

Baghra hasn’t changed much I see.

Baghra’s about to drop some truthbombs, but no, we have to be rudely interupted because Genya’s rapist is throwing a fit.

Chapter 7

How does Mal sound? Is she gonna say the Blade boy sounds like her dad? I mean, I know voices are partially genetic, but it has been tens of generations between them, probably.

So, we’re finally taking Genya’s trauma seriously after all this time? Good. Better late than never, I guess.

I wish that regicide was already finished and I’m pretty sure that Genya does, too. Stop defending the fucking king, narrative.

David’s a nerd in all things I see.

Someone please just kill the king already. And the queen, too, for good measure.

Now that’s a romance.

Infodumping and listening to said infodumps is a legitimate love language, Alina. Let them nerd out over poisons.

Wait, has Alina never directly killed anyone before? I thought she did... hmmm.

And just like that, it should have been over. Ugh.

Somehow, Baghra is a better teacher now than she was before. She half feels like a completely different character.

Nevermind, she’s back at it.

Chapter 8

Holy shit, Nadia and Tamar are canon. They have canon gays here.

So, which one of them is gonna die?

Chapter 9

We arrive at that scene. The one, where they should have fucked.

Jeez, girl, get a hold of yourself. Life is short, fuck a villain.

In other news, Genya and David definitelly fucked.

Chapter 10

Poor David. He just wanted to know.

Damn... I never realized just how young Baghra was, when she killed her sister.

I’ve already made a post about this, but it really does strike me like Baghra has already decided to end her life at this point in the book.

Why is that whole “but what if we’re related” thing even in there?

Chapter 11

We love a suprise attack.

When did Sasha boy learn that trick?

Baghra really just did that. Oh boy.

Chapter 12

No, don’t kill the kid... ugh.

Emotiona support cat. She should be friends with Milo.

Porrige for brains. Oof.

So Nadia was the one, who got bees set on her in the book. Cool.

That’s a good question. Why was it never brought up to Alina, that other Grisha get blocks, too?

David already thinking of steampunk prosthetic for Adrik is honestly kinda sweet.

Chapter 13

Back home... kinda.

Is that really... you really care about Mal bonking the Grisha school mean girl over a year ago? Okay.

Chapter 14

Angst! Yay!

And more angst.

Chapter 15

Sasha really went “My mom killed herself to save you? Well, I’ll kill the closest thing to parents you have.”

Chapter 16

Nikolai’s alive. Kinda.

And these two have such a sibling energy, I can’t.

And then they fuck. Ew.

Chapter 17

Wait, wait wait... so Alina isn’t even the one to destroy the Fold?

Okay. That’s... weird.

Holy shit. That was...

So, Aleksander is dead. Mal isn’t. Someone else destroyed the Fold for Alina and now she has no powers.

Okay.

That’s a weird-ass ending.

Chapter 18

The gays survived, so that’s nice.

Genya made good on her promise of making Alina a ginger, lol.

After

What emotion is this supposed to give me? Cause all I feel is kinda sad.

#shadow and bone #grishaverse #ruin and rising #book review #alina starkov #darkling #darklina

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i-was-bored-so-this-happened · 3 years

Text

Rae Watches Primeval

Season 1 Episode 2 AKA, This Post Has Been In The Making For Multiple Months/I’m Being Very Brave With All These Bugs

If you’d like to be tagged in future Rae Watches Primeval posts, let me know

This is long as fuck, my dudes

Spoilers. Spoilers everywhere.

Gotta love the end of the Previously On though “I lost her. And now I think she’s back from the dead.” THEME MUSIC BUH-DUH-BUM-NEEAAOOOOWW

Also - THEME MUSIC YEAHHHHH

Oh woah I zoomed in to make the image clearer and really I’ve just made it grainer. It’s that Essence of the 2000s

God, I hate the Underground. You know one time someone tried to push me down the escalators at an Underground? And another time when I was little I mis-timed my step and got my foot stuck in the gap and everyone just trampled over me? Hate the Underground

Ah yes, only when the train stops does it become unbearingly hot and all the women start fanning themselves at the same time

hhhhhhhhhh jesus fuck my worst fucking nightmare oh my god

i’ve already been in contact with many insects today so i’m going to be a bit more jumpy at this episode than usual, yes i know the insects around me were mostly plastic, shut up

The guy on the other side of the window heard nothing

Eyup, there are Duncan and Tom

“I swear on my Empire Strikes Back poster signed by Luke Skywalker and Dave Prowse”

I know we make fun of, “I do know what a sacred relic is, Duncan, I have seen Raiders of the Lost Ark” but that is a line I’d spontaneously make up mid conversation with my friends

Wtf is Duncan eating, the video’s too grainy to see

Duncan’s the only one eating, Connor’s brandishing a banana and Tom’s chewing a plastic fork Tag yourself, I’m Tom

I take back my statement of, “I know we make fun of...” because bruh please stop making nerds talk like this, every second sentence is not a pop culture reference

Is it cake? It might be cake

Look at the little bi man, unable to sit correctly. I understand, little bi man, for I, a little bi woman, am also unable to sit correctly

I’ve zoomed back out a bit so Stephen isn’t just squares

Connor. Honey. NO. Take the hat off and the outfit might be bearable ^ The entire fandom @ Connor at any given moment

OH, was that scene just...him finding out where Abby lived? That’s only just clicked right now. Connor why you stalking Abby, how did you even find out where she lives

Or was that him finding the “anomaly” and he already knew where Abby lived?

I’m not even going to mention the lizards, I leave that to @late2000shistoricalreenactment

HH NOPE NOPE NOPE CLICKED BACK ON TO SEE THE SPIDER FUCK OFF

Tom Cruise?

We’re Seven Minutes and Forty Seconds In, Folks. We’re In For a Long Ride

“You can hold my hand if you’re frightened.” “And how is that going to make me feel better?”

How the FUCK DO YOU NOT SEE THAT THING SITTING ACROSS FROM YOU?????

Bro. BRO. You’ve been spraying PESTECIDES everywhere on the UNDERGROUND and you’re just going to EAT the FOOD YOU DROPPED ON THE FLOOR without even CHECKING IT?

This lighting is so very nice to Lucy Brown, she looks lovely

“We should huddle together for warmth.” Is something I actually say to my friends if one of them says they’re cold and it usually works

Ah yes, the Stephen-Abby-Connor love-triangle everyone loved so much

Abby dON’T THROW AWAY YOUR TEA!!! JUST BECAUSE HE MIGHT BE GAY??? GIRL

That is a pitiful tent, even a one-person tent. Can’t even get changed in there

Claudia also getting comfy and sitting incorrectly in Stephen’s chair It is the chair or is it the people sitting in the chair, that is the question

“Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!”

asdkjbhasjhadskjhb Abby took a radio with her?

Not gonna lie, impressive remote-control life-size dinosaur for the two nerdy slackers

Dude is STILL DOWN THERE?? It’s been a whole ass day!!

Nothing came out of your spray can, bruh

Wilhem scream, present and accounted for

SO I...UH...STARTED THIS POST IN JUNE....IT’S NOW AUGUST...WHEN I STOPPED WATCHING I WAS ONLY 14 MINUTES IN....MAKE SURE YOUR SEATBELTS ARE ON

Oh my god since I was last on Dailymotion they’ve added a Picture-in-Picture feature, that’s going to make these posts so much easier to make!! Good going, Dailymotion, my beloved

Oh so potatoey <3

Connor this is why you signed th e OFFICIAL SECRETS ACT

Damn, look at that favouritism. You can’t pick a favourite child, Nick

I do love the soundtrack though, I’ve missed hearing it

“Venom, to be precise.” Then why did you tell her it was poison??

oof i’m gay, lucy brown is really just so pretty this episode

Lester’s hair was so messy in the first season

Boom boom bang bang baby!

Oh no, not the black Lexuses! Lexi? The big black cars!

THERE HE ISSSSSSSSS!!!!! MY BOYYYYYY TOM FUCKING RYAAAAANNNN

I have no gifs of him from this episode, criminal

“They don’t even know what they’re looking for!” neither do you!!! That’s why they’re going first!!

“Well, there can’t be that many types of venomous predator under the Aldwitch.” “You should see the last tube home on a Friday night.” ICONIC

no thoughts

funnily enough, i’ve never really been scared of the bugs in this episode unless i’ve encountered a lot of bugs that day

do the night-vision goggles really work that well when there’s actually loads of light in the room?

Wilhelm Scream Two, Electric Boogaloo

We get to see that that soldier’s bitten and then never hear about him ever again

This might be the most Tom Ryan gets to speak in any episode he’s in....and that is a crime

This cool rotating shot would have been cooler without the cuts

In case you didn’t hear that, as Nick and Stephen are gearing up, Stephen tells Nick, “You wear it well, you look good.” Do with that what you will

Ooohh, synchronised torch-turning-on

god the spider sounds are loud

“Does anyone have a really big slipper?”

hhhh okay the bugs are getting to me a little bit now, i’m going to bed soon, don’t infect my dreams please...

w...Stephen? what was that? I?

ugh i do love the shots that go around and through anomalies

Alright Stevey you don’t have to shout

Arthropleura: *is directly above him*

“Damn.” you really had no plan, huh

i’m sorry i just hallucinated-

a DALEK HAS HIM OH NO

A giant centipede, surplus oxygen, come on, come on [snaps fingers] you should be able to get this without Connor

Apparently when Cutter isn’t there all palaeontological and historical knowledge goes out the window and Connor restores those braincells

Abby, you can run after him, you know.....you don’t have to just stand there without moving.....call after him once and only once...and then not tell Claudia

Remind me one day to make a post about parallels between this episode and 5x04 because there’s at least a couple if I dig

Damn, Stephen, couldn’t you hear those sound effects? They’re louder than your voice!

There’s only fifteen minutes left and in that time Stephen has to nearly die

Well done on walking towards the giant magnet with your metal weapon

And THAT’S WHY YOU TELL CLAUDIA WHAT’S GOING ON, ABBY

“That’s the problem with heroic gestures: succeed and you look wonderful, fail and all you do is leave everybody else a bloody mess to clean up.” Claudia is so very quotable

You heard THAT, but not the giant BUG?

“What happened?” “Had an argument with a bug. Bug won.”

Ah yes, Helen, leave a message with a man and then leave him for dead, great plan

“It’s the kind of bug that’d stick to the kitchen at parties.”

NICK KNEW IT WAS AN ARTHROPLEURA, WHY DIDN’T STEPHEN???

oh god no, not this part, goddamn it stephen

“It’s so much easier to do this stuff when you’re dying.” - Dying man in a long-term relationship asks his colleague out shortly after speaking to his ex-girlfriend [who also happens to be his best friend's wife]

The spiders have had enough, they’re going home

Oh shit! Oh shit I have a shirt the same colour as Connor’s! I found it at work a couple weeks back and bought it! Yo!

Alright! Two days later, I'm back, and I only have like ten minutes to go so maybe this post will go in my queue today!!! Yaaayyy! It only took me...two months...

Oh so now CLAUDIA'S down here too??

dAMNIT

Did they ever explain why there's just...loads of bunkbeds in this abandoned section of the Underground? I can't remember. I don't get it.

Cewl

"If I don't come back, you can have my Star Trek Next Generation Top Trumps" "I'll treasure them" An adorable moment, honestly

"On second thoughts, actually, maybe you should bury them with me."

And he just happened to bring a bottle of...turpentine with him

I mean, I guess he knew there'd be bugs and he was always planning to go down into the underground to them so he brought it with him to keep them away? Or something? I guess?

Ah, yes, the only mention of Connor's panic attacks ever, it was nice knowing you

"Claustrophobia and vertigo on the same day," again, I think this might be the only time either of those things are ever mentioned, much like how all of Connor's allergies are brought up in the first episode but never actually cause him any problems

"Bite me" - Nick Cutter, 2007

Aw, he tried

Eugh, burned bug. Burned bug smells horrible, and that's a big bug

I can't get over how I have the same shirt as Connor now

Something that always bothered me when I was little was that if the bug bit into the bag it would have left holes, so Baby Rae couldn't understand how the venom didn't just leak out of the holes in the bag

I've never seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer...

My headphones keep making a buzzing sound like there's a fly in my room when nothing's playing through them and there is no fly, it's very irritating

It was at this moment in time I realised I'd written "Jenny" in every instance I'd meant "Claudia"

Ah, yes, the convenient amnesia

UGH, Abby's so pretty right here

Stephen is also pretty but like right now we're focusing on Abby

AH THE FATHER-SON MOMENT YESS

IT'S SO POTATOEY AND FUZZY, GOD, THE 2000s

"I don't suppose you'd consider giving me a cool nickname, would you?" *silence* "No."

No, Connor, please, it's better without the hat sometimes, this is one of those times

UGH I LOVE THE ANOMALIES

The Helen Where Are You track is one of my favourite pieces on the Primeval soundtrack, I listen to it all the time

askjhasdkjhsjh the little break that tells you what's on next is included in this recording and apparently Dancing On Ice aired after this episode sdajkhsaskjh

#primeval #rae watches primeval #BOOM BABY #WE BACK #for how long who knows #but i'm here #howarequeue

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sevlgi · 4 years

Text

white knight

requested: yes

group: red velvet

pairing: irene x fem!reader

genre: fluff, mild angst

contents: college!au, scaredy cat!irene

warnings: swearing

synopsis: Irene isn’t looking to be saved by a white knight, but she can’t help falling for you when you rescue her. From a spider. In a college dorm.

a/n: i’m sorry for how long this took me 😂 I hope you enjoy!

word count: 3.8k

It’s not a super fun thing to be woken up by a blood-curdling scream at 4 in the morning.

The hallways and rooms of your dorm building are especially echoey, causing the scream to sound like it’s erupting right next to you. Considering that you’re not a heavy sleeper, it’s pretty damn terrifying.

“Shit,” you gasp, fumbling to get out of bed. Your dorm is pitch dark, as it has been for the past week or so while most people in your building have been gone for winter break. You thought you were the last one left, but clearly, that’s not true. “What the hell?”

The scream sounds again, louder and shriller this time, and you wince, stuffing your feet into shoes that you’re sure don’t match and grabbing the heaviest textbook you can find. Your campus is supposed to be pretty safe, but judging by the screams, there’s probably a serial killer on campus, and you’ll definitely die fighting them off.

It’s not hard to find the room of the screamer; it’s the only door ajar at the end of the hallway, bright light spilling out from inside. Honestly, it’s weird for a killer to keep the door open and the lights on, but your sleep-deprived brain doesn’t make much of it, and you kick the door open violently.

There’s an ugly cracking sound as the doorknob slams into the wall, but you’re focused on the fact that there’s definitely not a killer in the dorm. No, there’s only one person inside, a petite girl in a bathrobe and face mask, standing on top of her bed and screaming at the open door of the bathroom. “What- did you crack my wall?” she demands, staring at you.

“I- that doesn’t matter, what the fuck are you screaming at?”

She points a shaking hand at the bathroom, and you’re half-expecting to see a rabid dog or a dead body. Instead, it takes almost a full minute for you to find the spider on the tiled floor. “The fuck- you’re screaming about a spider?” you groan, already wishing you didn’t get out of bed for this.

The girl frowns and crosses her arms. “Well, yes. Spiders are scary. If you don’t mind, could you kill it? You did break my wall.”

You smash it with your foot, scraping it along the floor to leave a streak of spider guts. The girl’s still staring at her gross floor when you whirl around with your hands on your hips, about to give her a piece of your mind. “Why the hell? You gotta be more considerate, it’s 4 in the morning and you’re screaming your head off about a tiny-ass bug.”

“It’s not my fault I have arachnophobia,” she snaps back, and you bristle at the audacity. “I mean, I didn’t ask for some white-knight wannabe to burst in and ruin my wall.”

“Wh-” you sputter. Drawing yourself up to your full considerably unimpressive height, you spit out, “Well, fuck you. Next time there’s an actual serial killer, I’ll just leave you here to be smeared on the floor like that goddamn spider. Again, fuck you!”

“Wannabe,” she calls out behind you, muffled when you slam the door shut. You want to believe it’s a fever dream, but the reality of it is that you have a rude-ass neighbor with a horror movie scream, and you didn’t get enough sleep to survive class.

All a day in the life of a college student, right?

“Pleeeaaasseeee.”

You glare menacingly at Jisoo, who doesn’t even flinch. “No.”

“Come on,” your roommate pleads, tugging on your arm. She’s all too used to your stubbornness to give up on something she wants you to do now. “Please? I really want you to meet Jennie!”

“Come on, Jisoo,” you sigh, still typing away at the essay you started an hour too late. “You’re dating the most popular girl on campus, and you want me to come to dinner with the two of you?” At Jisoo’s nod, you roll your eyes and ignore her pout. “You’re kidding.”

The brunette groans; even her patience has a limit. “Jennie’s so sweet, she’ll love you! Besides, she’s bringing her roommate.”

“Should I care?”

“A really hot roommate,” Jisoo amends. “Absolutely your type. I’ve met her, she’s so gorgeous. Her name is Joohyun, and she’s a year above you, I think. She’s super pretty and super sweet and I’m pretty sure she’s super gay-”

Your hand, clamped over Jisoo’s mouth, cuts off the flow of unnecessary information. Honestly, even the mention of a pretty girl isn’t enough to get you to want to go to dinner with your roommate and her uber-popular girlfriend, but you know Jisoo will just reschedule if you don’t come and nag you until you agree. “Fine. I’ll come, but I won’t be happy about it.”

“Trust me, you’ll definitely be happy,” Jisoo squeals, pressing an exaggerated kiss to your forehead before leaving the room, probably to tell her girlfriend the news.

You don’t pay any attention to your easily excited best friend, simply continuing to type away. The mention of dinner with a pretty girl quickly slips away to the back of your mind, a vague throb in the background.

“I think I see them,” Jisoo tells you with a huge grin on her face. You’re sitting in a booth opposite her, and you’ve been ignoring your roommate’s hands tapping at the table for at least 20 minutes now.

“You said that 10 minutes ago,” you grumble, flipping through the menu. Honestly, one of the only things that got you to agree to the stupid dinner was the promise of food, and your mouth is practically watering at the pictures of ramen on the menu. “Are you sure it’s them?”

Your roommate quickly smooths her hair down, grabbing your face to check your makeup and ignoring your disgruntled noise. “Yes, I’m sure. Can you at least smile?”

Luckily, there’s no more time for Jisoo to fuss over you; you spot Jennie first, recognizing her by her cute gummy smile and expensive perfume. However, when your eyes travel to the girl behind Jennie, your jaw drops in time with hers.

To anyone else, it would seem like you’re simply shocked by how pretty the girl is, and that’s partially true. ‘Joohyun’, as you remember, is absolutely gorgeous, to the point where she seems unreal. Porcelain skin, glossy raven hair, and dark eyes widened in shock make her easily the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen.

However, you can’t help but see a face mask and bathrobe that no one else can see, and you can hear an ear-piercing scream rattling in your ears. Maybe Joohyun sees the oversized shirt you wore that night, a shoe in your hand that you used to smash a stupid spider.

Either way, you’re not letting Jisoo know about what you did.

Extending your hand with the fakest smile you can muster, you introduce yourself. “Hi, Joohyun, right? I’m Y/N.”

“Um, yeah. Hi.” After taking your hand, she slides into the booth next to you, although you’re sure she’s almost hanging off the edge with how much space is between the two of you. You’re the direct opposites of Jennie and Jisoo, who are practically glued together opposite you.

Jisoo’s oblivious, but she’s not oblivious enough to miss the tension between you, and Jennie has practically no tact. Her sharp eyes observe the icy stare Joohyun gives you and she asks, “Do you two know each other?”

“No,” Joohyun answers immediately, her cold expression melting into a sweet smile when she looks to her roommate. “She just looks like someone I met a few days ago. Remember the girl I told you about?”

“Yeah,” Jennie laughs, covering her smile with her hand. “Yeah, I remember. You still haven’t fixed that crack in our wall, you know.”

You pray that Jisoo doesn’t ask for details, but of course, she does. “What crack?” she smiles, eyes lighting up at the promise of a story. Really, Jisoo?

“Oh, you know how everyone was gone for winter break?” Joohyun smiles, tucking her hair behind her ear. It’s not fair how gorgeous she looks. “There was a spider in my bathroom, so obviously I screamed.”

“Are spiders that scary?” you can’t help yourself from blurting out. Jisoo raises an eyebrow at you. “I mean, it couldn’t have been too big.”

“Anyway,” Joohyun continues, fully ignoring you. You bristle at her dismissive attitude, but stay silent to hear whatever lies she’s spinning about you. “This girl busts into my dorm and throws the door open so hard that it makes a huge crack in the wall!”

“Damn,” Jisoo comments. You want to glare at her, but that’ll just be painfully obvious. “Who was she?”

The brunette beside you laughs, shaking her head. “I don’t know! But I fully intend to find her and make her pay for my wall. To be honest, she looked a lot like Y/N, about this tall, with this hair color too. Even her face looks similar!”

“That’s funny,” Jennie chimes in now. “You should try your best to find her then, if you’ve got Y/N as a reference. It’s gonna be expensive to fix up the wall. Do you think we’ll get in trouble with administration?”

Jisoo shakes her head, and you watch on helplessly as your roommate digs you into an even bigger hole. “You won’t if you fix it in time. Y/N can help you guys!”

“Really?” Two sets of eyes turn skeptically onto you.

“I own a kit to fill in walls,” you blurt out, cursing internally. Honestly, you want to slap yourself. “Yeah, I can help you guys fill in the crack. It’ll look like nothing happened.”

Jennie offers you a gummy smile. “That’d be great! Would tomorrow work for you?”

All of a sudden, Joohyun’s eyes grow wide and she protests, “Neither of us will be home though, maybe we should wait until you have a free day?”

“Nonsense, you’ll be there. You don’t have class tomorrow, remember?” Jennie grins, flapping her hand and looking down at the menu. “You can stop by anytime, Y/N. Now, should we order? I’ll pay.”

As your roommate cooes about how considerate her girlfriend is, you studiously avoid Joohyun’s eyes. Honestly, you have no idea if you’ll survive tomorrow, not if you’re faced with a hot girl with an obvious grudge against you.

Fuck.

“Uh, would you mind opening the door a little more?”

Joohyun stares at you suspiciously through the tiny crack that she’s opened the door. You can’t help but notice how pretty she looks, hair up in a messy ponytail and dressed in a simple white shirt, but you school your expression into a frown to mirror hers. “Step away first.”

“What the fuck,” you sigh, shifting the spackling kit under your arm. “I’m not gonna slam the goddamn door again, just open it and let me in. Or do you want to explain to administration why you have a crack in your wall?”

“Because you’re an asshole,” she mumbles, opening the door just enough for you to squeeze through. “Who the hell barges into someone else’s dorm at 2 in the morning?”

“It was 4 in the morning,” you snap back, although there’s a twinge of guilt in your chest at the sight of the huge crack in the wall. The cracks aren’t wide, thank god, but there’s a lot of them. “And I barged in because I thought you were being murdered! Who the hell screams like that because of a tiny-ass spider?”

She hesitates at that, and you smirk, satisfied. Crossing her arms, Joohyun scowls, “Whatever. So, am I supposed to pay you for this or something? I don’t know how much I’d usually pay to get someone to do this for me, so don’t overcharge.”

You stare at her, at the brown eyes darting to look at anywhere but you. “What? Jesus, I’m not that much of an asshole. You don’t have to pay.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, the fuck?” you mumble, starting to open the kit you’ve set on the floor. “Did you think that little of me?”

Joohyun rolls her eyes, but you think you can see the tiniest bit of a smile tugging at her lip. “I mean, you did make that crack. It’s the least you can do.”

‘“Look, I feel bad about the crack, but you didn’t need to embarrass me in front of my roommate. You made it painfully obvious that the asshole you were talking about was me,” you frown, looking up at her.

She wordlessly places a cup of water by you, settling down in a chair a few feet away with a thoughtful twist to her brow. “Mm. Whatever, it got you to fix my wall for free.”

“Yeah, and I’m not doing it again. I’m keeping my promise that if you get murdered next time, I’m not coming to save you.”

“Sure you will,” Joohyun laughs, and you can’t help but stare at the way her eyes shine.

Suddenly, you’re not sure you will either.

The next time you see Joohyun is a few days later at 2 in the morning in the communal washing machine area.

“We’ve got to stop meeting at ass o’clock in the morning” is your greeting to her.

She looks tired, you note, although you’re sure you do too. There’s only 6 washing machines in a floor with a couple hundred students, so ass o’clock of the morning is usually when you come to steal two of the machines for you and Jisoo. Whenever Jisoo agrees to do the laundry, she miraculously finds an empty machine at a convenient time, but you’re nowhere near as lucky.

“Hey, Y/N,” Joohyun yawns, rubbing at her eyes. She’s carrying an empty hamper, probably for clothes she washed earlier. You wonder which one of the swirling machines is hers. “It seems that this is the only time of day you’re awake.”

To be honest, you don’t appreciate being teased for your choice of afternoon classes to preserve your sleep, and you tell Joohyun so. However, you do appreciate the small smile that cracks her usually impassive face. “Anyways, need help?”

“What?”

“Need. Help?” you say again, enunciating the words exaggeratedly and earning a halfhearted slap. She doesn’t respond, only opening two of the still machines. “Really, two machines? How many clothes do you have?”

“Some are Jennie’s,” Joohyun scowls, flipping a shirt more aggressively than strictly necessary. “I think some are Jisoo’s too.”

You snort, holding a pink shirt that you’re sure belongs to your roommate. “I better not find any underwear or something.”

“With how often Jisoo sleeps over, I wouldn’t be surprised,” the other girl sighs. “Seriously, how did you not meet Jennie before that dinner?”

“Apparently, Jisoo didn’t want me to get the wrong impression by hearing them fuck in the other room or something.”

“How considerate,” Joohyun says dryly, and you don’t manage to suppress your laugh. When you calm down, you realize that Joohyun’s staring at you, though she quickly averts her eyes. “No, I’m serious. I heard Jennie moan Jisoo’s name enough times before I met her that i didn’t even need to be introduced.”

You scrunch your nose, observing the neat way the other girl folds her laundry and copying. “Gross. I thought Jisoo would be the loud one.”

“No, she’s pretty loud too.”

“Oh, ew,” you protest. “I mean, that can be hot sometimes, but Jisoo probably sounds like a dying duck.”

“And you don’t?” Joohyun shoots back. Almost immediately, her pale cheeks color to a deep pink, even though you didn’t have remotely enough time to make an innuendo in your head. “Oh my god, that’s not what I meant, I don’t care what you sound like-”

“Shut up, I didn’t even think of that,” you snort, still folding laundry. “You’ve got a crazy dirty mind if you immediately connected those two things.”

Joohyun throws a shirt at your face and you yelp, catching it only to throw it back. Somehow, it breaks the tension and you both start laughing, folding laundry while exchanging jabs at your respective roommates.

Maybe she’s not as bad as you thought.

It becomes almost a tradition to meet at the laundry room at 2 in the morning on Fridays. The next time is accidental, but after that, you’re sure that Joohyun’s making changes to her schedule just to catch you doing your and your roommate’s laundry and joke with you.

You become sort-of-friends, although you rarely hang out outside of folding shirts together. Sometimes, when Jisoo and Jennie are being gross together, one of you will escape to the others’ dorm, but that’s about it.

What worries you is the not-so-friendly thoughts you begin to have about Joohyun. Sometimes, you can’t seem to stop staring at the girl’s lips, and you feel the itch to hold her hand.

It’s weird.

Therefore, you’ve been forcing Jisoo to do the laundry for the last week and keeping out of your dorm to avoid seeing your sort-of-friend.

You’re only home when Jennie comes knocking because Jisoo makes you stay home while she goes out with friends. You really can’t fathom who’s at your door, so you yank it open.

“Um… hi?” Jennie offers, a sheepish smile on her face. “I brought dessert.” True to her word, her arms are laden with boxes upon boxes of sweets, all of them your favorites.

“Is this a bribe?” You wince at the words that come out, knowing that they sound accusing. “Sorry, just…”

Jennie shrugs, placing the boxes on a table. “I mean, you’re not wrong. I am bribing you.”

Shoving a pastry in your mouth, you cross your arms and try not to look smug. “What for? You’ve got me in a good mood, it’s in your favor to ask now.”

Your roommate’s girlfriend laughs, hesitantly taking one of the desserts when you offer them. “Well. Jisoo and I actually had a really nice date planned for Valentine’s Day, but we can’t go. You probably know Jisoo has a family emergency, right?”

You manage to nod sympathetically despite your cheeks being stuffed full of sweets. “I’m going with her, she’s so worried that I don’t trust her to fly across the country on her own. But we don’t want our date to go to waste.”

“Okay, but what does this have to do with me?”

Jennie shifts, looking slightly uncomfortable. “Right, so Joohyun’s willing to go on the date, but I don’t want her to do it all alone. Would you be willing to go with her?”

At your slight frown, she rambles, “It doesn’t have to be a date for you guys, it’s just a nice dinner! You know, it can just be a nice hangout between friends who definitely don’t have feelings for each other.”

“Do you know something?” There’s a slight jump in your pulse; there’s no way Jennie could know that you might have feelings for her roommate, but you’re nervous nonetheless. What if she’s told Joohyun?

She blushes, chewing lightly on her lower lip. “Of course not! So. Will you do it?”

It barely takes a moment of thinking for you to say, “Sure, I’ll go on a date with Joohyun.” You wince lightly at the blunt way you said it, clarifying, “A not-date. With my friend.”

“Good,” Jennie sighs, standing. She returns to her confident popular-girl image with a smile, handing you a little envelope with a time and date written on it. “Have fun.”

“I will,” you mumble, staring at the envelope.

What have you got to be nervous about? You’re just hanging out with your friend, who you definitely don’t have feelings for and who definitely doesn’t have feelings for you either.

Right?

You really don’t know why you spend almost an hour getting ready for your not-date when you usually wouldn’t care what you wore to hang out with friends.

It feels stupid to frown at your simple outfit while piles of clothes surround you. Just on time, you hear Joohyun’s knock, 3 quick raps as always.

“Hi,” you manage to get out, sounding more breathless than you’d like. She looks perfect as always, but she looks just as flustered as you feel. “Um, let’s go?”

“Right, yeah,” Joohyun mutters, shaking her head and walking faster than she should. “My car’s this way.”

Both of you are uncharacteristically quiet on the way to the car and even more so when Joohyun starts driving. It’s awkward, and you’re sure it has something to do with the fact that you have feelings for her.

You can’t muster up the courage to say something, but you remain silent until the two of you order food. Suddenly, Joohyun groans out, “This is so awkward.”

“Right?” Glancing around you to make sure people aren’t staring, you slump a bit, shaking your head. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” She raises an eyebrow, sipping at the cup of wine she holds. “It’s not your fault, it’s just weird for us to be on a date when we’re just friends.”

As you frown, you can’t help but notice the slight blush on Joohyun’s cheekbones. “I mean, my feelings for you have got to make it weird, right?”

Immediately, Joohyun spits out the mouthful of unfortunately expensive wine, hacking and coughing as she stares at you. “Wh- feelings!?”

You can’t help the dark red flush rising to your face, definitely less flattering than Joohyun’s own. “Shut up, Jennie told me you knew.”

“I don’t,” she says, looking thoroughly convinced. “I was being awkward because I thought Jennie told you about my feelings.”

“Your feelings? What feelings?” You do your best not to be so loud when the other customers start looking your way, but you can’t help the shocked expression on your face.

Joohyun scowls now, staring anywhere but at you. “The same feelings as yours, idiot. Romantic ones, not-friends ones! Want-to-kiss-you feelings, want-to-go-on-dates-with-you feelings!”

“What…?” Realization dawns over you, your mouth forming a little ‘o’. “Jennie and Jisoo knew. They told each other about our feelings and set us up! I’ll bet they didn’t even have a dinner reservation!”

The girl opposite you groans, shaking her head. “Oh, this is so like them. They’re so meddling, I’m going to give them a piece of my mind once they get back!”

“Same.” You sit in silence for barely another moment before you blurt out, “So, you like me back?”

“Yes, you idiot,” Joohyun scowls, tossing her napkin at your head as if it can block the growing grin on your face. “Now shut up and enjoy the food.”

You do as you’re told, but dinner is definitely less awkward once the truth’s out. A weight is lifted from your shoulders now that your feelings are reciprocated, and you catch Joohyun smiling at you as if she feels the same way.

Maybe you don’t regret getting up to kill that spider after all. It’s still undecided.

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lesbinewren · 3 years

Note

hey friend, i've been following your blog for a while now and i absolutely think you should go on a rant about modern sw canon being homophobic! i agree with you and i'd love to hear your points (especially re: anything having to do with tarkin, as im not as familiar with that) (:

ill try to not turn this into like a full six page essay lmao

so basically there are at this point a fair amount of gay/bi characters in sw canon atm... just none appearing on-screen (or at least not being explicitly gay on-screen) except for those two women that kissed for like half a second in tros. so thats point one i guess- all but completely restricting even acknowledgements of gayness to books/comics that dont get nearly as much recognition as the screen media does.

point two is that theres a pattern of the main characters they choose to make explicitly gay as being... considerably less moral than others sometimes. and im not saying that every single gay character needs to be completely flawless with the sun shining out of their ass at all times, but why cant we get more lead, unquestionably heroic characters to be confirmed gay or bi? we have gay villains (tarkin being sorta confirmed gay in facpov, moff mors who deserves an entire post of her own), and then characters that are more like anti-heroes, or at least heros with darker pasts/tendencies (aphra, sinjir, arguably characters like sana, chass and yrica but those three to a much lesser degree).

and i dont... dislike those characters. i actually LOVE aphra, shes probably one of my faves, and i loved sinjir and conder in aftermath. i dont really have any problems with their stories at all, it’s just that they’re part of a pattern of characters with sometimes questionable morality (aphra working with vader and happily siccing her droids to torture and murder people etc & sinjir being a torturer for the empire who then joins the rebellion and tortures sometimes for that cause too). like again, my problem isnt that gay characters arent paragons of virtue, its that most characters they happen to make gay also happen to be the morally gray ones. im not really asking for less dubiously good cay characters, just also more solidly heroic gay characters to balance it a bit.

and they are getting better, there are more solidly heroic main gay characters... its just for every wyl lark or kaedan larte you have a gay imperial officer and an offhandedly mentioned dead pair of husbands. and i also dont think id mind as much if there wasnt a history in film especially where even implying gayness was prohibited unless it was condemned or shown to be immoral. i dont think its intentional, but its hard not to get that vibe when they make their biggest canon lesbian character blow up cute tooka cats for fun lmao (as much as i adore aphra)

and my third and probably final point for now is the deliberate vagueness of things, and the way that they sometimes confirm characters. i think they’re especially egregious about this with bi/pan characters. i dont have the direct quote, but when confirming lando to be lgbt during solo promotion, they essentially said he’s pan because he... has sex with droids and aliens? no mention of you know... being a man attracted to other men, that might be too controversial ig. also i think it was donald glover who specifically said something like “how couldn’t you be pansexual in space, there’s so many things to have sex with” as if thats what being bi/pan is which just... yeah.

and then also in the leia book (a book i really like), the “confirmation” of holdo being bi is when leia says something about sticking to “humanoid males” and holdo tells her “thats limiting” or whatever which a) its a personal pet peeve of mine as a lesbian when people say things like that, even tho its said to a straight person, its just insulting and acts like sexuality is a choice and bi/pan people are more enlightened by choosing not to “limit themselves” and b) in context they’re talking about a like... bug alien or something like that, its been a minute since i read the book but it wasnt just like a humanoid alien woman or anything. so again... being just vague enough to get woke points for your character being lgbt without actually having them express same gender attraction AND equating being bi to just being willing to screw whatever i guess.

and for the record i dont think that this all means star wars is being unforgivably homophobic. i DO think characters like aphra, sinjir and others are good representation, i just dont want characters like that to be our only representation, because thats when things start to get more questionable for me. but like, i think its AWESOME that aphra has her own comic line and audiobook where she’s very explicitly gay, and the fact that she’s probably the most popular modern star wars comic-originated character while being a lesbian seriously makes me happier than i know how to express. i think the fact that the alphabet squadron trilogy made two of its female leads explicitly bi and one of their male leads end up in a relationship with another man is amazing. i love sinjir and conder’s romance being a primary feature of the aftermath trilogy. i think its incredible cool of them to have the bravery to make an iconic character from the original trilogy pan, even if im not a huge fan of the phrasing they used (and would like them to be more explicit about it in future content). like, i dont want to be all negative because i think there is a lot of good rep there. i just know it can be better, and being allowed to criticize it makes me feel better about it, and hopefully will start more conversations that lead to them being more mindful in the future.

#ask #anon #i can elaborate on any specific points these are just my general thoughts

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nicoscowboyhat · 3 years

Text

PJO/HoO/ToA characters as things me and/or my friends have said

a lot of these are discord messages bc we haven't seen each other in person in a while :( some of the ones at the end are from a notebook i had though where i would write down the funny shit we would say. came in handy lmao

Clarisse: i would've been a heavyweight for a cheerleader and thrown some hoes

Arrow of Dodona: Thou side bitches art foul for i despise thy hairstyle

Octavian: i love how i'm just automatically the misogynist

Percy: hey guys i can make my dick invisible

Jason: NO FUCKING WAY

Nico: ill fucking kill you. squash you like bug

Leo: piper wants a smoothie. a smoothie i shall make

Lester: hey besties pro tip: don't make brownies in the microwave

Annabeth: ayo ive got like. reverse appendicitis rn tell me some comforting shit 🔫🔫

Percy: you're sec c, don't die

Annabeth: ty

Percy: aw shitttt almond butter and jelly on da everything bagel

Leo: Vigarous gay sex

Jason: Vigorous is spelled with an O.

Piper: sexo gay vigoroso

Meg: don't worry

Lester: i will worry if i so please

Will: but i don't think you can kill monkeys

Nico: you can but they put up a pretty good fight

Will:

Nico: oh you mean like legally

Ethan: my power went out while i was sleeping

Luke: lmao loser

[the gang is arguing about some guy eating white chicken. like literally snow white. not boiled, WHITE]

Clarisse: well the whole point is that it's not raw and the man took a bite and it wasn't

Silena: he died later that week clarisse

Percy: foo fighters in algebra what will happen next

Octavian: dick an d balls

Reyna: No politics in chat plz!

Luke: submerges into the spin cycle

Luke: god

Ethan: is always watching

Luke: hope he didn't see me push that elderly woman down the stairs

Ethan: definitely did

Luke: shit

Grover: fuck school i just wanna play animal crossing 😡😡 enough of this "physical education" shit i am planting tulips 😡😡😡

Connor: i'm going to throw up into someone's mouth like a bird

Travis: as you should king

Harley: [holding out a decapitated rubber chicken filled with grape juice] would you like a drink from the chicken chalice?

[everyone's name was changed in a discord server]

Nico: why is my name spaghetti i just realized this

Hazel: we're all sketti here

Nico: ah

Nico: i thought it was so you knew who to kill when the italian genocide came around

Leo: penis

Piper: sometimes

Jason: i have chronic cool guy syndrome

Frank: is it contagious? i'm feeling a cough

Reyna: just heard octavian speak day ruined

Will: CISHET MAN ALERT 🤢🤢

Percy: bro what if we went to japan

Grover: AHAH I WAS EATING CHEESEBALLS WHATS THE CONTEXT??

Jason: how's octavian been doing? has he gotten worse?

Reyna: he's pretty much the same. considering driving a semi truck into his house.

Percy: yo did u do work?

Annabeth: no but thank u for asking

Luke: pillage an empire to assert dominance

Nico: Noose?

Will: Nooses are not very hot nico

Will: thor got that gay little bridge

Annabeth: i'm gonna put my alphabet soup in numerical order

Leo: pog to your mother

Will: [sends a drawing he made of jar jar binks with kylo ren's outfit + lightsaber that says "meesa finish what youssa started"]

Everyone:

Will: react

Will: react to jar jar

Luke: you ever just,,, eat someone on accident

Jason: yo gamma your fam still vibin?

Jason, 2 seconds later: that felt gay to type

Thalia: crimbo this year is gonna be litty titties

Thalia, 12 am on christmas day: merry shitscream my dudes

Nico, 10 years old: i have question

Nico: please

Nico: bro

Nico: q,ueshtun

Nico: kweshtin

Nico: i've just one

Nico: query

Nico: pleabse

Clarisse: you sound like gay cat in the hat

Kayla: BIG BOYS BIG STEPS

Meg: words are for CHUMPS

Luke: i'm laughing because i ran over a cat yesterday and i can't stop thinking about it

Nico: yo titties are gross

Frank: please don't spoil cinderella

Leo: she loses her slipper

Frank: does she ever get it back???!?

Piper: [surfer voice] fudgecakes, dude

Will: i watched star wars in the bathroom... probably tmi but i don't care

Coach Hedge: you're trash. i will run you over

Lester: please stop singing miss mary mack!

Meg: i hope you get dragged my miss mary mack.

Percy: [singing] i wanna be the mayonnaise to your bologna, wanna be the cheese to your macaroni

Octavian: i'm above everyone! except, um... triangles. they scare me

Luke: my mom asked me what i wanted for dinner and i said "chinese food" and she said "how about olive garden" i said "MAY i SAID CHINESE FOOD"

Nico: my mom died [default dance]

Connor: the thing is, i didn't ask.

Travis: damn bro that really hurt my feelings

Connor: i'm sorry bro i didn't mean to hurt your feelings

Travis: it's ok i lied

Connor: that's ok i did too

Reyna: [clone high JFK voice] bitches be like "i'm the shit" nah you ain't even the fart

Lavinia: me having a stroke after inhaling caffeine like it's a tuesday

Leo: damn girl, you shit with that ass?

Austin: i'm about to eat a rock. hungry like gertie

Nico: who is sports? i've never heard of them

Lester: i think it's a band

#long post bc my friends and i are cursed with being fucking hilarious #pjo shitpost #this post is severely lacking in hazel bianca and frank quotes i am so sorry #i'll make it up to you i promise

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