Selina: I made up a game with my cats. You will need a sofa and one of my cats.
Harley: I only have one of those things. I just need a sofa.
Edward: My puzzle is time consuming. (shows a picture of a puzzle)
Jonathan: Ed stop doing a puzzle.
Joker: I am a meme. My face is a meme.
Harvey: (looks at Oswald’s drawings) Nice turtle.
Oswald: It is supposed to be a fish!
Jervis: Oh you’re confused? I’m mentally insane.
Harvey: I understand now why people drink when they get depressed.
Edward: (to Jervis) You’re seriously going to get in a van and let Jon take you to a mysterious party for an entire weekend?
Jonathan: Oh, not just him, you’re coming, too.
Edward: Oh, and how do you think you’re going to get me to do that?
(Not even a minute later)
Edward: (tied up and being pushed into the van) Unhand me. This is ridiculous.
Jonathan: I told you to put tape on his mouth!
Jervis: And I told you he bit me.
Jerome: what did one ocean say to the other?
Jeremiah: i don’t know, Jerome, what?
Jerome: nothing he just waved
Jerome: did you SEA what i did there?
Jerome: i’m SHORE you did
Jeremiah: how do you have friends?
Jervis: don’t be such a beach
D-Directionally Challenged Squad Rise-Up… ;w;
The man is a Master of Corn Mazes. Meanwhile, you couldn’t find your way out of a paper box. You are very lucky that he’s as good with directions as he is, because without him you are absolutely helpless. You can’t even read a simple map! How did you get through life like this? (Says Mr. “I Don’t Know How to Use a GPS and I’m Too Stubborn to Learn How”)
That’s actually how you met! He had you trapped in what was pretty much a giant maze puzzle. And after witnessing you struggle just to get out of the first damn room, he finally decided to give you some hints. (”USE THE DOOR. NO, NOT THAT ONE–THAT ONE.”) Eventually, he ended up leading you out of the maze himself, because good god.
You would think that he’s good with directions, considering his interest in mazes, but he’s not nearly as good with them as he’d like to think he is. He tends to try to make up for that with a false sense of confidence, only to end up even more lost than he originally was. (”Jervis, are we lost?” “No, no, not at all!”
Ten Minutes Later“Oh, we’re definitely lost.”)
This is crazy, by the way.“ You mumbled to yourself.
"Are you sure you still want to do this?” Batman looked down at you and you nodded. “I’ve come this far.”
“Remember I won’t be far away and I won’t let you out of my sight.” Batman reminded you. “Yeah, got it. You nodded, run your hands through your new hair.
It was actually a wig, a blonde one that was styled like Alice from Alice in Wonderland. You wore a black skirt and white shirt with a black ribbon under the collar. After that was a red coat that you left unbuttoned and red lipstick to match. You memorised lines from the story but regardless, the blonde hair was important. It would be what fixates him. It was always the first thing that draws him in and then he can’t let go.
It was very cold in Gotham on this particular night and you weren’t sure if your trembling was in anticipation, fear or simply the cold. The plan was unconventional and utter madness, but so was Jervis Tetch. If you kept your distance from him, lured him away, then it would be fine The hostages would be safe.
Getting in was tricky, you had to be silent and create an exit for yourself. A quick and easy one. Luckily enough, the buildings entrance door had no door. Unfortunately, there were corridors upon corridors, like a maze.
It seemed almost fitting that he chose this place.
However your stomach dropped when you found he wasn’t alone.
Two-Face, Scarecrow and the Riddler were also present with Jervis.
You silently cursed to yourself.
These other criminals made it significantly more difficult, not to mention two of which being genius level in intelligence.
You were going to just leave, you turned, ducking behind a corner before Jervis’ voice rang out. "Alice?”
Jervis: I’m… grounded?
Edward: (folds arms) Yes, you’re grounded! You had one order.
Jonathan: (holds up a shovel) And now we’re gonna bury you until you’ve learned your lesson!
Edward: Jon, that’s not how grounding works-
I think a lot of the OFF soundtrack suits Jervis, but none as much as this song.
sketch from last night - I don’t draw my versions of mad hatter and scarecrow enough
Well, vibe check yourselves and your pals.
Serious smut warning very steamy~ Jervis gets what he deserves~
MGE IS 18+ land but Jervis is finaly happy
Just trying to make him happy.
It’s the first thing that came to mind.
“YOU’VE RUNINED WONDERLAND WITH YOUR FILTH”
“NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
I think it’d break him more.
I just want 4′11″ Jervis Tetch lovingly topped by a woman taller than him who absolutely adores him. He deserves it. Obvious smut warning. This is the full chapter now edited and finished all will be uploaded to my AO3 as well~
This is the build up full smut happens next part~