#i can't even with this nonsense

[ingravinoveritas]

I am entirely floored at the discourse that's been happening on social media (mainly Twitter) since Michael confirmed that his first crush was on John Taylor, to where I actually saw someone describe Michael as a "non-practicing bisexual."

Not only does this go right back to what I wrote last year about how in the past it was only okay for men to be gay/bisexual on TV and in film as long as they never acted on it, but I am nearly 100% certain that if Michael had said his first crush was a girl, no one would think he hadn't thought about kissing or having sex with them. In one fell swoop, this manages to disregard every other comment Michael has made about finding men sexually attractive, not to mention him going to the Scala Cinema in Kings Cross in the '80s--a place known for having late night gay orgies and nicknamed the 'Sodom Odeon'--and coming up with an entire head canon for Aziraphale and Crowley revolving around that.

Also, Michael Sheen has not spent the last five years making it extremely clear--both on and off screen--that he would fuck David seven ways from Sunday (and probably already has) just to have his sexuality erased by calling him a "non-practicing bisexual"...

#michael sheen #welsh seduction machine #david tennant #soft scottish hipster gigolo #and you best believe there are more examples than this #but my god #i can't even with this nonsense #'non-practicing bisexual' i mean #what does it take at this point #other than Michael being photographed with his lips vapor locked around David's cock #i'm having war flashbacks to David's 'not an active participant' BAFTA interview #do people honestly think that means neither of them have actually been with a man? #i think Michael has been telling us exactly who he is for a long time now #david is lowkey bi and Michael is highkey bi #ineffable lovers #thoughts #discourse #gifs by me

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

*tries to organize my thoughts*

*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*

*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*

(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next

#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment #so many innocent bystanders at stake #every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis #racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system #and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description #aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh #(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt. #but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.) #seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this. #the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later? #that is not cute. it is Alarming. #no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain #and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students #this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE #...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power #and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class #which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever #it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses... #anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you. #obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding #are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it #please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent #mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies #& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground #mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man

[buckttommy]

a new (returning) character being added to 9-1-1's roster means that at some point, buck has to scream tommy's name in terror. he just has to. like. can you imagine how much differently that would hit? we saw the members of the 118 give buck the grieving spouse treatment when they all thought eddie was dead in a well. but if buck's boyfriend—as in, his actual, honest to god, officially recognized boyfriend—was in literal danger somewhere? jesus. i just got chills. i need it like oxygen.

#Eddie trying to hold Buck back from putting himself in danger and like. Of course Eddie is terrified too. #Tommy went from 0 to Best Friend status (not like Buck. Never like Buck) so quickly it was almost dizzying #but he *knows* what this means for Buck. Knows what Tommy means *to* Buck and he can feel the terror emanating from him. Can feel his blunt #nails almost drawing blood as he claws at Eddie's skin probably not even aware that he's doing it. #And they fall backwards—Eddie's arms still firmly around him—and Bobby is shouting nonsense reassurance at both of them before he and Chim #go back to save/find Tommy and Eddie's just chanting in Buck's ear ''it's okay everything is going to be okay'' and at some point Buck just #stops fighting and slumps back against him. His entire body shakes and he's just like ''it's Tommy Eddie. I can't lose him. I can't I won't #survive it'' and Eddie's eyes sting with tears but he's just like ''I know I know. Everything will be okay'' and holds him through it while #Buck falls apart in his arms. #anyways. #yeah. that would be kinda sexy i dunno #jack.txt #bucktommy

[english-history-trip]

"So this wealthy family has a cold, manipulative, ruthless patriarch..."

"Yes sir, we already have Charles Dance in the studio."

#I thought of the first five off the top of my head but I wanted an even number #so I looked up his credits and of course he's played Ralph Nickleby #nonsense #literally no reason for this other than I can't sleep

[secondbeatsongs]

hey. I need help

what the fuck does this song say?

like specifically at around a minute in, after what I'm pretty sure is "and the donkey they threw from the bell tower", what's this guy saying? I'm losing my mind

here's the unedited song if it helps:

all of the lyrics online are wrong or incomplete and there are no official ones anywhere! I just want to know what that dude is saying!

#dry the river #dry the river - new cross #new cross #music #it says golden fleece after #so this is a greek mythology thing #but I can't catch enough of the words to make any sense of it #even as nonsensical as it probably intentionally is #help meee #signal boost #etc

[coquelicoq]

shin yoosung and lee gilyoung demonstrably would love kim dokja if he were a worm. they've proven it. they have a room full of evidence of how much they love every creature they think could possibly be kim dokja. when he disappears from the world they see him in all things and their love expands accordingly. so yeah, they'd love him if he were a worm. if he's a worm they immediately make him a super comfy terrarium and attach a label that says KIM DOKJA WORLD'S BEST WORM. the first few times they fight over who gets to cuddle him they maybe accidentally pull his head off, but they're quick learners. (and it grows back. the guy's a worm.)

now would they also find a way to make kim dokja being a worm into a competition over who loves him best? obviously. lee gilyoung would be all smug at first. he'd be like hyung is a bug, i win!! and shin yoosung would be all actually it means more that i love him because i clearly love ahjussi for ahjussi whereas you just love all bugs so it doesn't count. and then they'd slapfight until some nerd came along to reveal that worms are members of kingdom animalia, thereby destroying shin yoosung's argument. they have to settle it as a tie. a worm is clearly a bug and technically an animal. either way kim dokja is kim dokja and they would love him in any form, in every universe.

#idk is the whole returnee arc foreshadowing for the kdj fragments thing??? #i can't articulate this because i'm just banging it out during a commercial break but are you seeing my vision or is #my vision nonsense? i need a second opinion lol #anyway i am right about the worm thing though. would they love him if he was a worm? no question. zero. #they wouldn't even understand the thought experiment. they'd be like obviously? duh?? #orv #sys #lgy #orv spoilers #my posts #omniscient reader's viewpoint #f

[fromtheseventhhell]

Another reason that Stansas hate the idea of Arya and Dany being friends (outside of them wanting to demonize Dany) is that they've convinced themselves that Dany and Sansa are the only main female characters, so if a Stark sister is going to have a significant relationship with Dany it has to be Sansa. Arya being constantly downplayed and treated like an accessory to Sansa has generally led to the consensus that her relationship with Dany will be defined by whatever Sansa's relationship (positive or negative) with her is. That's why Arya is always being left out of the "we were robbed of [x] female character friendship" conversations and why theories about Dany/Arya getting along are treated as Sansa hate; Arya, as a character, is seen as secondary to Sansa by a lot of people

#arya stark #anti sansa stans #Don't get me wrong I'm happy whenever people discuss Sansa/Dany parallels instead of pitting them against each other #but the difference in how their potential relationship gets discussed vs. Dany and Arya's is very obvious #and the root of it is that people don't want to perceive Arya as being her own important character outside of her relationship with Sansa #(but also that some people simple don't view Arya as an actual female character because they're misogynistic) #even though Dany/Arya have many parallels shared experiences + values and tons of foreshadowing #Show!Arya was the exact opposite of Book!Arya to justify her disliking Dany but somehow that never gets acknowledged #and people complain about Sansa and Dany not getting along in the show but Arya is ALWAYS being left out of the conversation 🥴 #just made a post about this with receipts so they can't even pretend this is something I made up 😭 #cause they sure do love to gaslight us about the shit they try to pull like we can't see them #this is why I need TWOW to come out so we can get Arya's Braavos arc and finally be free of the show's terrible writing #fandom nonsense

[grahamcarmen]

#red crackle #red crackle thoughts #carmen x gray #gifs #carmen x graham #gray x carmen #graham x carmen #see i can't help but go OOOOOH PETTI SPAGETTI SANWHICHES [while i eat popcorn] #but also the way dark! carmen slumps before getting up and calling him a traitor [whens the other traitor in her eyes IS important #and she never really got over it] #and ughh it sounds so petty BECAUSE she's hurt #or even how gray is distancing himself too when he says it #:( armed and dangerous and putting on his smugness #like he isn't gonna soft face twice smh #GAH he's like :( the cafe meant nothing but he's scoffing and smiling before putting it aside #also i was a loser and said wow...they're a pretty couple- #these two put me thru so much pain [enjoying the drama of it all] #if they can't be soft at the end of all this nonsense it will have been for naught i fear </3

[ehghtyseven]

a study in... something

#sidney crosby #pittsburgh penguins #nathan mackinnon #colorado avalanche #honestly I can't even begin to talk about all the nonsense on display here #I was going to crop them to get rid of the text #but whatever sid is doing with his thighs was too important to crop #smh #mine:gif #mine:sid #gif:s #sidney #penguins #timmies #sid & nate #smiley sid

[culxiaa-fn]

I hate them, i hate them so much.../hj When the opportunity arises all of them are so willingly being sacrificed even to the point they offer themselves but when their sacrifice at the end ended up hurting one of the NXX members or involved others in it THEY SHUT DOWN AND BLAME THEMSELVES

The secret chat is lowkey heart breaking ngl cause you can see how protective they can be for each other... Like yeah me??? Sacrifice myself and end up dying 😯👍👍 okay! I will do it!! But me?? Sacrificed myself but in the end they still got hurt??? 👎👎 I will shut down and cry

#◇ my nonsense #tears of themis #i can't.... this event show us even if the game required them to not trust each other at the end they are already in tune with each other #they subconsciously trust each other

[ingravinoveritas]

feliciafancybottom replied to your post "angelsadvocate96 replied to your post "I am…"

I saw one earlier about Michael setting such a fine example for straight boys who go through a 'phase' of crushing on men. Yeahhh. Michael "No closet can hold me" Sheen… Michael "Happy Bi" Sheen… Michael "I set David on fire fairly regularly" Sheen… Michael Sheen who did one sex scene with Stephen Fry 27 years ago and hasn't stopped talking about riding him like a bucking bronco ever since. Is that the right Michael Sheen? If so, I think someone needs to tell him that he's the Sheriff of Straighttown now because I don't think he got the memo.

@feliciafancybottom Oh my God. "A phase"...yeah. That's always the other one, isn't it. Never mind that he had a crush on John Taylor when he was a teenager, and then a crush on Jude Law during Wilde when he was almost 30, and now an overwhelmingly obvious crush on David in his 50s. Nope, definitely just a phase.

I just...I genuinely do not understand how anyone thinks that the man who made that "closet" tweet, who christened himself "THE southern pansy" during Pride Month a few years ago, who said he considers one of his characters (Roland Blum) to be pansexual, and who has been telling us exactly who he is in every way possible for multiple years now...is completely straight. And to then have the gall to dismiss Michael's sexuality by further referring to it as a "phase" is the peak of bi erasure.

On one positive note, I will say that "Sheriff of Straighttown" made me snort, and I'm now picturing Michael and David roleplaying that with Michael as the "straight" Sheriff and David as the seductive "saloon girl" who leads him astray, so thank you for that. Haha. Good times...

#feliciafancybottom #reply post #michael sheen #welsh seduction machine #i think Michael has been telling us exactly who he is for a long time now #him using the word 'pansexual' was honestly what convinced me most #because that is not a sexuality that most het people would ever think about let alone mention #Michael is not hiding #even if he doesn't label it specifically #bisexuality #bi erasure #i can't even with this nonsense #fandom woes #discourse

[another-clive-blog]

Why are we as a fandom not talking more about this scene ??

Clive is literally asking the professor to come back and stop him. Like this isn't him pretending to be Future Luke : he looks genuinely upset/displeased even after the professor promises to come back. He only goes back to smiling after the professor says, and I quote "I wouldn't dream of leaving things here in that state" before talking about stopping his future self. Clive wants confirmation that Layton is actually going to confront the bad guys, that he won't just solve the mystery but fix it too.

And this is literally so important. Clive's speech at the end, about getting saved. This is concrete proof that he had truly meant it from the start, because he's asking for Layton to stop him and thus save everyone here. Which, hey- he didn't just hope and wait to get saved, he tried to save himself too.

Yep, that's right. The game talks about how dangerous it was for Clive to bring Layton underground : it doesn't talk about how even more dangerous it was to let him leave. He could have brought back cops (he did). He could have gathered precious knowledge out there (he did). He could have never come back (and yet he did !!). Clive letting Layton leave is the biggest threat to his plan, and yet HE DID. And you know what else he did ? Make Layton promise to stop him. You can't make a clearer call for help, you just can't.

"Oh but it doesn't make his crimes more forgivable, now does it-" of course not. This isn't about Clive's redemption, it's about Clive trying to avoid needing a redemption : his efforts are vain the moment he started using the fortress. But. There were efforts.

#Damn Syl ! Back at it again with the nonsense/stating the obvious !! <3 #Actually nope I don't care. I know how it feels when your self is working to achieve a goal your essence is actively against. #You just feel TERRIBLE. Shouldn't I give in ? I want to give in. It feels wrong but fighting it feels even worse. I'm tired #This exchange is so important. The despair. Asking for help when he knows at that point he's not getting saved it's too late #Like he's been working on the mecha he knows it's done he knows he's starting it. He knows Layton will be his enemy #And yet he still asks him to fix things. He still lets him go when Layton would have understood if it wasn't possible #It's about Clive asking/trusting Layton to keep the fight going and win even when Clive himself knows he can't keep fighting #I feel like I'm repeating myself. It's 2am and I'm sleepy ahah but I needed to get this one out <3 #clive dove #professor layton and the unwound future #professor layton and the lost future #unwound future spoilers #lost future spoilers #My analysis #(Scheduling this one to post when I'm sleeping. I wonder how this one will go lol)

[thepoisonroom]

i know modern dating is a hell because i once went on a date with this lady and when we were about to kiss i pulled back and went "oh sorry i thought we were a vase for a second" and she didn't like that in the least

#i was out there wasting my best material on audiences who were giving me nothing #personal nonsense #i do think my girlfriend gives me credit for being funny when even when i am being earnest which makes me feel very charming #she works in law and when we met i was like oh can i ask you a work-related question #and she was like big sigh assuming i was going to ask for legal advice #and i was like sorry but where do you buy your suits? and she did a very friendly laugh that made me feel super at ease #she was also very nice about it when i got too high and was telling her it makes me anxious that #i can't tell if zoomers who say slay a lot are gay or just very logged on #she was like 'oh i'm sorry for laughing you're just being very darling' and i was like 🥺🥺🥺 #sorry for girlfriendposting so much she's just the best partner i've ever been with!

[january-summers]

Hmmm, what's new in Plot Bunny Land today?

Pre-series canon divergence where Epsilon's self-destruction left Wash in a vegetative state, his brain is completely intact physically, but it's a case of the lights are on and no one is home.

Not one to waste resources, Director decides to use Wash's empty brain to house Alpha instead of Private Jimmy. And Alpha creates a version of himself that blends what little is left of his own sense of self with the remnant memories of Agent Washington.

So Alpha wakes up in Blood Gulch convinced he's David Church, Dr Leonard Church's son and Agent Carolina's older brother and he worked for Project Freelancer in Command and oh god oh fuck oh NO, he's responsible for his sister's death. His father had him reassigned to the backwater Blood Gulch outpost as punishment because Alpha David is still his son but Director cannot even look at him right now.

(Worse, he thinks he got his sister killed because he was distracted by an affair/breakup with Agent Texas. Allison Beth, he calls her Beth, it's her middle name and she honestly preferred it and Allison was his mother's name.)

And Florida Butch Flowers thinks: good enough.

(There's still huge gaps, but Butch manages to convince him it's from brain damage when the MOI went down, so Church rolls with it.)

Except Wash isn't gone. He was just recovering.

Tucker has many concerns about his team, his CO is... certainly something, and he's convinced Church has a split personality disorder he doesn't seem aware of.

Church's ability to hit a target with a gun is inversely proportional to how much of a prick he's being. (or: Wash can hit his target, Church still cannot.)

Caboose likes Church. All of him. The nice-ish one and the mean one and the psychotic one. All Churches are good Churches and shall be his Best Friend. Yes.

(Wash is trying not to lose himself to the trauma Epsilon left behind, tries to cling to the outgoing and social person he was before, but sometimes he just really wants to do a violence. There's nothing wrong with that.)

Obviously Wash does not die by friendly fire, but he does maybe get severely injured which still prompts additional Freelancer backup.

Freelancer reactions start with "Oh, so this is where they hid Alpha" (for those in the know) to "Why does Church seems so familiar at times? ... HOLY FUCK WHAT DID THEY DO TO WASH?!?!"

Florida's survival is optional. Options are Optional.

(Ohhhh, Florida having Wash's emp unit in case of absolute emergencies.)

#rvb #red vs blue #leonard church #agent washington #more plot bunny nonsense I have not the spoons to write #I actually have another similar au floating around that has even less than this ^ #it's literally just: Epsilon and Wash blend during the initial implantation because Wash's brain brains weird #and they think they're one and the same person now #they can't tell where one begins and the other ends

[lalaland-e]

have you ever known someone so used to your crap that they don't even bat an eye when you walk into a room an loudly exclaim

"Everything in here could kill you, but I can do it most effectively"

#That's an actual quote from me #I'm insane #That's not even the worst one #I have them written down #I can't remember saying half of them so I'm convinced that a demon possesses me just to say the randomest crap possible #life quote #quotes to live by #life quotes #quotes #jokes #shitpost #random nonsense #random #funny post #funny humor #funny #funny stuff #lol #dank memes #lol memes #best memes #meme #idk what this was #me irl lol #idk #idk how to tag this

[tmascfaggot]

hi. insane post from yours truly. been talking to a few ppl abt robot-centric kinks and wanted to share this glitch i saw in a museum on a machine that was supposed to read your pulse

the insane part is that i find this erotic and gender affirming in the most. abstract way humanly possible. my fave tech glitch I've ever seen irl

#i am not tagging this because it's nothing this is just show and tell #but the 'aquiring pulse' only to immediately devolve into extremely broken nonsense #like oh? did you sense something wrong with me? is there something corrupt in me in place of a heart? #did you find something worse than a heartbeat? something you can't even process? #:3c #sorry. sorry. sorry. i'm insane sorry #signal broadcast 📺