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#i had a lot to process after watching the episode
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TADC: Thoughts on Jax in Episode 2
Thoughts on Jax after Amazing Digital Circus Episode 2 Dropped.
Massive spoilers below the cut. Just watch the ep before you read.
Amazing Digital Circus had an amazing second episode as we're introduced more to what the adventures are like, and what NPCs are like and ofc the existential horror of being a living AI only created for a source of entertainment.
Also, I love the dream sequence at the beginning, because we actually get some deeper insight into Pomni's thoughts on Ragatha. Feeling like her helpfulness is the guise of like "man, you're not cut out for this like the rest of us" which is typically something a lot of people who have been bullied in highschool perceive genuine acts of kindness and engagement. (which I kind of suspect Pomni might have been, or at least, been a shut-in and didn't have a lot of friends in her human life. )
Jax wasn't really the main focus of the episode, but it wasn't really until the end of the episode I understood his behavior and what this episode is foreshadowing overall.
Since while Jax isn't the focus emotionally, he is definitely the plot device to push things forward. And I mean, a plot device in a very active and quite literal way. He's the one that causes Pomni to clip out of the map, takes advantage of everyone and is just... genuinely an unpleasant person.
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I actually really like this.
As, I know the first episode in the digital circus, many people (me included) could perceive or analyze Jax's actions as someone who is "helping" in a roundabout asshole way. Episode Two has none of that here. He just wants Bloodshed, And I love that we're getting additional context on his character.
It's hard to tell how much fan reception Gooseworx saw of episode one before episode two hit production, so I don't know how much of the fandom perception of Jax had an influence on the writing process, but I can't deny that might have been a factor in assuring us "no he's not secretly helpful, he's just an asshole" But I'm just going to assume that this has been part of his characterization from the start and it becomes way more clear as the episode goes on.
But there was something in his behavior throughout this whole episode that seemed off to me. Like Jax was taking up a majority of the B-plot, while Pomni had the A-plot. So I was wondering why Jax seemed to be the protagonist with the B-plot when Pomni was the A-plot when they seemed to be so disconnected with eachother in motivations and telling us things about the characters.
But then it hit me when the episode ended and the two plots merged together.
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"who... knows... what could happen..."
And then it hit me.
Pomni finds comfort in an NPC who is going through a similar experience to her and can emphasize, despite their being other humans who have gone through the same thing, due to her self-admitting to being a loner in her human life. Well, she didn't admit it outright, but from how she perceives Ragatha's kindness as an act, or patronizing, it seems like she doesn't have a lot of friends...
Meanwhile... Jax... He treats the adventure like a videogame. Why shouldn't he? He's trapped in a videogame, right? But it really goes beyond that.
The fellow humans that Jax is trapped with, he treats THEM like they're NPCs, while Pomni treats the NPC like they're human.
Jax says to Gangle "Aren't you supposed to be the suggestible one?" Which you wouldn't typically wouldn't say to a person, right? That's something you would say more about a character that you maxed out the dialogue trees in.
He calls Pomni "His Bridge" even.
They're his objects. His tools, his own npcs he's exhausted the dialogue options on.
Jax dehumanizes the players in a way that Pomni humanizes the NPCS.
These are two opposite ends of the spectrum but what really sold it for me was Jax's reaction to the funeral.
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And Jax is the one member out of the cast who doesn't even show up to the funeral. (aside from Caine and Bubble but they are AI.)
He does NOT want to think about the Players as real people. And showing that opposite perspective compared to Pomni I think is much as important going forward.
Jax was the plot catalyst of this entire episode, and served the thematic theme of the episode quite well, even if it didn't look like it on first glance.
I absolutely loved this episode and I can't wait for more.
Also... Poor Pomni can't have shit in Detroit
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ifwebefriends · 1 month
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My thoughts during “The Sign” [SPOILERS!!!!!]
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ID in ALT
More thoughts under the cut
So I think most of us can agree that this is the best episode of Bluey so far. It was so emotional and satisfying in ways that are kinda new for Bluey. It answered so many questions while giving us a few new ones. I’ve been waiting for this episode for months and it did not disappoint in any way.
This is just a Chekov’s firing squad of an episode. As in a lot of stuff that was set up in earlier episodes all pay off in this episode. I kinda understand why people love soap operas now lol. I will say that this episode was a tad overwhelming for me in the best way possible. As in I had to pause and rewind every 30 seconds or so so I could emotionally process what was happening before moving forward (but that’s a me thing). There was just so much going on and I’m happy about that.
Now onto individual thoughts about specific things:
The callback to Baby Race (“you took your first steps in that house!”) really got to me because Baby Race was the first episode of Bluey that I watched and it immediately made me fall in love with it so it just got to me.
When Chilli said “Frisky and I came up here as teenagers to…um…think,” my mind started racing immediately with “what the FUCK happened at the Lookout?” “Who hurt Frisky and/or Chilli?” And I’m just so curious about what made Chilli say that line like that but we’ll probably never know what happened.
So yeah that scene at the end when the music was playing and Bandit ripped the sign out of the ground and Chilli tackled him to the ground ABSOLUTELY CHANGED my brain chemistry y’all. I can’t articulate my feelings any more than that.
I know some people were upset that Brandy ended up getting pregnant but I thought it was great for her! I’m happy for her! And I think that even though she got what she wanted in the end doesn’t negate the feelings she had about her infertility earlier. But I think we’re all wondering who the father is and I don’t know if the show really needs to answer that.
The whole message of “we’ll see” in terms of if something is good or bad is such a mature message that I never really thought of like that so I will be taking that philosophy forward in life. Congratulations Bluey, you managed to teach a 22-year-old childless person something new and insightful about life that I don’t think I’ve learned from another show.
I want to know more about what Bob was going through and feeling and why he went to India, but again, we’ll probably never know.
I just love how the wedding photos were beautiful but imperfect. Like of course we’re not perfect and nothing will ever be perfect but it’s beautiful and worth remembering anyway.
So many little jokes and moments were so funny in a mature way (I.e. “are we allowed to do that?” And Nana thinking there was about to be a baby announcement) were just so funny and memorable.
I think some people would say it’s a cop-out to end up not selling the house after building it up for 2 episodes but I don’t know, I think it works. I think Bluey and Bingo learned a valuable lesson and Bandit (and Chilli kinda) learned it’s not always about making their kids lives “perfect” in their eyes. Also I’m just personally glad they didn’t end up selling the house and I also kinda like that it wasn’t entirely their choice to keep it.
On a more serious note I think this episode has some interesting commentary on like gender roles and gender relations in straight relationships. In this episode Chilli and Frisky (both women) have to deal with their male significant others pressuring them to move with them far away from what they know and love. In the end they don’t end up moving and the men didn’t seem to have like malicious or selfish intent with it, they were just kinda basing their choices off their jobs instead of what’s best emotionally for their loved ones. But I think it’s interesting to have this conflict where gender is kinda brought up in a way (“because your husband is making you”). It kinda plays into the traditional idea of like men are the breadwinners and the family has to move with them regardless of what they actually want. And this episode kinda like deconstructs that and says “no, it’s not always about the job or money, it’s also sometimes about connections and emotional attachment.” And I’m not saying that you should never move or whatever, but really weigh your options. I just thought that it was interesting that this episode kinda touched on that.
So yeah that’s kinda the main thoughts I had on this episode if you made it this far thank you for reading my rambles and have a good one!
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nutmeggery · 9 months
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I need Neil Gaiman to know that Good Omens 2 made me feel emotions I haven't felt in nearly a decade.
When I heard there was going to be a Good Omens 2 I was looking forward to it, of course. I just wasn't expecting it do anything super special to my emotions. I was sure I'd enjoy it, though. I really enjoyed s1.
But, for the last few years, I watched shows and afterwards basically thought well, that was fun, and I quickly moved on and didn't think much about them. There was only about 3 shows in the last 5 years that had made me feel truly emotional and stayed on my mind to the point where I felt like I needed to engage in fandom for a while. (Good Omens 1 was one of them.)
I wasn't spoiled by the leak. I never even knew there was a leak. So I had no idea what was coming in s2. And oh boy...
See, I'd watched Our Flag Means Death, a show where you don't expect the lead characters to kiss, because, well, that never happens in these types of shows, right? And this is important because when they did kiss, it felt like a door that had been locked with just about all the high security locks in the world had suddenly, inexplicably, been opened. Something switched inside me. It took me months to understand what it was, but when I thought about Good Omens before s2 came out, I realized what it was.
I would never truly enjoy a bromance they're-only-queer/in love-by-your-own-interpreation story ever again. Stories where nothing is confirmed, just subtext that anyone who doesn't want to see it can easily deny and mock those who wish it was more.
While it was clear that Crowley and Aziraphale cared a lot about each other in s1, and were probably in love, it was still just a fun ship for fans to play with in fanfiction and fanart. Do they love each other? Oh sure. In what way? Well, that's up to interpretation. Ok, cool. But it's not quite Our Flag Means Death, is it?
Then I watched Good Omens 2. And from episode 1 I saw my favourite Angel and Demon duo love each other. And I was having the best time. I hadn't had such a good time watching a show in a long while. It was not only right up my alley, it was an alley I wasn't even aware was my alley until I saw it. I enjoyed seeing the old characters, the new characters. Oh, I was wonderful.
It was clear to me that, of course Crowley and Aziraphale love each other, are IN love with each other, showing it in their own way. And I wasn't expecting it to be THIS obvious.
And then when the kiss happened, I couldn't believe it. I covered my mouth with both hands and gasped and sat up straight in my seat. I had never expected it--the heartbreak it added to the already heartbreaking scene--it rewired something inside me.
It was like my emotions had been locked up in a stall like a horse for so, so long, and now the gate had been opened, the stable door kicked down, and the horse was running out onto the large pasture into the daylight, bucking and kicking up grass. Oh my god, I have to take a few minutes to process that entire 6 hour marathon of emotions.
And by a few minutes I meant a few days.
More than a few, actually.
I didn't need a kiss to understand how much they loved each other, but I did need the kiss to understand how intense and heartbreaking their separation is for them after everything.
But more than that, the kiss broke a barrier. They really did it, I thought. They really dared.
Aziraphale and Crowley aren't human males, no, but they're played by male actors. And that is significant. That makes the kiss significant. In the world we currently live in.
Weeks later, I'm still obsessed with the show, re-watching s1 and 2, reading the book again, listening to the audio drama. And I'm on tumblr, seeing people's posts and art to somehow sate my hunger for a s3 that doesn't exist (yet).
And I'm having a wonderful time.
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enwoso · 18 days
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BORROWED. NOT STOLEN - alessia russo
*i have quite a few alessia fics that im working on atm but if anyone has any requests for players then lmk because im open to write for other players<3*
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"LESS! hurry up man!" you shouted across the room as you stood watching your girlfriend dawdle down the stairs. you and the blonde had been asked to film a diary room episode together — a way to document any world cup memories.
where the pair of you would sit down and basically talk about camp and other things until the media team had enough content.
watching as alessia walked down the stairs scrolling through her phone as a small smile was on her face which to you felt like years but finally after ten minutes it wasn't even two she had made it to where you were stood.
"i think i've aged about fifty years in the time it's took you to walk down fifteen steps!" you huffed as alessia looked up from her phone slotting it into her blue england shorts, smiling as you shaking her head a little at your dramatics.
"yeah? you look it too!"
you knew that was coming, rolling your eyes and smacking the blondes shoulder pushing her slightly as she held back her laugh.
"baby, i'm joking" she said while swinging her arm and wrapping it around your shoulders, pulling you closer to her as she placed a soft kiss to the top of your head as you began to walk towards where you were filming.
"your lucky i love you russo!"
you sat down first on the couch as alessia slotted down comfortably beside you, as she sat a little lower making sure her head rested on your shoulder making you look like the taller one when in reality it was the polar opposite.
"okay, you ready?" you asked the blonde after being given the run down from the camera men as the cameras began to film.
"hi guys, i'm y/n.." you smiled waiting for alessia to say her name but instead there was an awkward pause until a yelp escaped the blonde from you elbowing her in the ribs in order to get her attention.
"ow! what was that for-"
"introduce yourself!"
you cut the blonde off as she held her side dramatically even though you had barely touched her. "you said you were doing the introductions!" alessia defended herself.
you sighed, "no i said i would- oh nevermind,, im y/n and that's alessia" you smiled at the camera, pointing at yourself and then at alessia who looked confused.
filming got to a great start, and it got to the point where you actually forgot you were being filmed, "OH my fear of spiders is totally normal, at least i'm not scared of turkeys" you teased. it being your turn to poke fun of the blondes fears as she had just spent to last five minutes poking fun at your totally normal fear of spiders.
you began to recount the story of the other day, when the two of you were out on a walk in your down time in australia.
"no did you not see them, they did start and charge at us!" she defended as you gave her a side eye look, "i wouldn't say charging"
"oh i would!"
"it's was walking and minding its own business!"
"yeah.. but it did look us in the eye."
"then you began to use me as a shield as you hid behind me" you smirked, knowing the blonde was a lot taller then you and your small frame was never going to protect her from anything. "well i wasn't getting eaten by a turkey! england wouldn't have there stargirl then" she defended herself as you scoffed rolling your eyes at her cocky comment.
"oh so instead i'm just turkey bait to you,, cheers less!" you rolled your eyes as she began to plead her case of 'that's not what i meant!' as the filming carried on.
"in the eighty-" you began talking as alessia looked at you not that she was listening and you could tell.
"did you come in here with that cap on?" she asked you, making you stop your story as you looked at her with a strange look.
"yeah?" you responded as she looked at the black cap that was on your head, snatching it from your head and messing up your hair in the process and then placing it on her head instead.
she turned around, and back giving you a dramatic pose as she looked at you with a serious look trying to hold in her laughter. "do i look good?" she asked as you nodded, alessia beginning to pose more.
"here comes the vogue model!" you whispered, still loud enough for people to hear you. "think this suits me" she says to herself as your still smiling and laughing at your girlfriends antics.
"do you just want my entire wardrobe?" you jokingly asked knowing the blonde had quite a few of your clothes in her wardrobe however realistically it was nothing compared to amount of clothes you had 'borrowed' from the blonde.
"i've only got your cap!" she smiled turning to look at you, "and anyways your one to talk, there my joggers!" she said pointing to the grey joggers you were wearing. you gasped, "they are not, these are actually mine ms russo"
the blonde's eyebrows rose as she smirked pointing to the initials that were embroidered next to pocket, "AR, yeah?" she hummed a smirk on her lips as she knew she had caught you in the act of stealing her clothes once again, as you paused for a minute coming up with your next line.
"th-that means nothing, it just the brand name!" you scoffed coming up with a half-assed excuse as alessia rose her eyebrows trying her best not to burst out laughing.
"mhm, what brand?"
"oh not sure, mum bought them for me for christmas!"
you sighed throwing your hands in the air, as alessia began to laugh not being able to hold it in any longer as you rolled your eyes playfully as her.
"you've stolen my hoodies though, and it wouldn't surprise me if you were wearing my socks!" alessia pointed to the black adidas hoodie you were wearing and then to the white adidas socks you were wearing.
shaking your head as you began to plead your innocence once again, "the hoodies borrowed, not stolen." you began really emphasising the word borrowed. "and the socks are actually mine!" you smirked as alessia hummed side eyeing you.
"really?"
"yes!" you say looking at the camera but mouthing 'no' but alessia can't see as she's sat slightly behind you. "doubt that!" the blonde mumbled as you turned to her and began to laugh.
"no.. th-there actually georgia's but i don't think she knows" you say in between giggles, exposing yourself meaning georgia will definitely know because even if she doesn't watch the video on youtube, alessia will make it her mission to tell her.
"so the two huge suitcases you brung to australia" alessia began as you turned to her and slotted back into the gap at the side of her, nodding slowly unsure as to where she was going with this sentence. "what did you actually bring, because i think i'm yet to see you in your own clothes." alessia continued.
"as if you didn't bring three whole suitcases with you!" you defended yourself, as her and katie had packed enough for the two of them two move to australia as everyone else in the team had two bags.
"yeah, but i haven't been living out of someone else's wardrobe for the past two weeks like some"
"i did bring clothes! these slides are mine!" you smiled bringing your cream slides into the camera angle, as you tried to bargain your case when in reality you just liked to wear your girlfriends clothes — they were comfy and as a big bonus they smelled like her.
"your such a big dope!"
"your big dope though." you smiled looking at alessia as she too had a huge smile on her face as the blonde  brought you closer to what you thought was a hug instead she was putting you in a headlock.
"thanks for watching, i've been-"
"ALESSIA MIA TERESA RUSSO! let go of me now!”
"i've been alessia and she's been y/n!"
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hischierswhore · 10 months
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clingy
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pairing: Lando Norris x gf!Reader
tw: none
a/n: me? writing fluff for once? well it's semi fluff. kinda like a comfort fic?? maybe? i don't really know tbh
You and Lando enjoyed hanging out with friends. Whether it was his friends or yours, you both had a great time regardless. There were also times when you would hang out with your friends alone and he would hang out with his friends alone, which of course you had no problem with. You’ve been together for 8 months now, so you had plenty of security in your relationship.
Lando currently had a few of the other drivers over at his house. All the drivers were on holiday so you were able to spend some time with Lando before he had to go back to his hectic race schedule. Unbeknownst to everyone except your boyfriend, you were upstairs watching “The Summer I Turned Pretty” on your TV.
Midway through the first two episodes, you got hungry so you went downstairs to get a snack. Just as you approached the bottom, you heard someone mention your name.
 “Is anyone elses girlfriend super clingy?” Charles asked
“Kika and I just spend a lot of time together” Pierre added
“Y/n is sometimes clingy. It can be a bit overwhelming at times” Lando answered. You heard your name and frowned as you took in his words. You were overwhelmingly clingy? You barely ever saw him.
Hearing that, you turned around and made your way back up the stairs, your appetite suddenly gone as you rushed to pack your bag and leave.
“Oh shut up, mate. Y/n is not clingy from what I’ve seen. Usually it’s you jumping on her for comfort, not the other way around. You’re absolutely whipped” George threw a bouncy ball at Lando’s head.
“Yeah I know, I’m only joking. She’s just so perfect. I love her” Lando blushed as he grabbed the bouncy ball and threw it back at George.
Just then you quietly made your way down the stairs and brushed past the group of guys without a single word as you crossed through the living room to get to the front door.
“Where are you going, love?” Lando stood up from his seat and walked towards you, grabbing your wrist to halt your movements. You turned around to face him.
“I uhm- forgot I have to go walk my sister’s turtle. Bye” You said the first lie you could come up with as you pulled your wrist out of his hold and turned around. You opened the front door and shut it behind you, praying that Lando wouldn’t follow.
Lando turned around and went back to his spot on the couch.
“Is that a thing people do here? Walking turtles?” Pierre asked, confusion written all over his face as he looked around the group for an answer.
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Ever since that night, you hadn’t been over to Lando’s house. He would call and text you to make plans, but you would come up with excuses to not be able to go. You didn’t want to seem any clingier than you supposedly were, according to Lando’s words.
After nearly a week of avoiding Lando, he’d had enough of it. You were in the process of making yourself some pancakes when your doorbell rang. You turned the stove off as your grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around your shoulders, since you were lounging around in a sports bra and shorts. You couldn’t see anything through the little peep hole so you opened the door, shocked to see Lando standing there with flowers in hand.
The smile that was once on Lando’s face turned into a frown when he saw the blanket wrapped around your body.
“Oh baby, are you feeling ill?” He was genuinely concerned. He thought you had the blanket around you because you were sick, and you still weren’t fully up to seeing him, so you joined in on his misconception.
“Yeah, I’ve got a massive cold. I don’t want to get you sick too” You made your voice sound as scratchy as possible before pretending to cough.
“I don’t care if I get sick. Let me take care of you” He said as he pushed himself into your flat. He grabbed one of your arms and dragged you to the couch, where he grabbed both of your shoulders and pushed you into a sitting position. He ran across your flat to your bathroom to get the thermometer so he could check your temperature. You knew you’d be screwed if he actually checked.
He came back moments later, the little green thermometer in hand as he took the clear cover off.
“So uhm… I don’t exactly know how to work this” Lando held the tool in his hand, trying to figure out how to use it.
“No worries. I’m just not feeling great” You fake coughed again. Lando placed the thermometer on the coffee table in front of the couch and placed his hand on your forehead. All you could think was ‘shit’.
“You feel normal. What’s going on, love?” He asked as he slowly sat down next to you.
“What do you mean?” Your voice was back to normal, yet it was quieter than it usually was.
 “You’re being all distant and shutting me out. We haven’t seen each other much. I just…did I do something?” He asked, the hurt in his voice evident as he spoke.
“I’m giving you a break” You answered and he just stared at you.
“Wh—what? A break?” He asked.
 “ Yeah, a break. I heard what you and the other drivers were saying the other night, Lando. I didn’t-” you took a moment to breathe.
 “I didn’t know that I was somehow clingy and that it bothered you” Your voice cracked as a tear streamed down your face.
He wrapped you in his arms and held you as you cried into his shirt.
“Oh my god. Let me explain everything, okay love?” He said as he slowly let go of you.
 “I did say that but what you probably didn’t hear is that I said it was a joke. You wanna know what I told them?” He said and you nodded your head.
 “I told them that I love you and that you’re perfect, because I truly do love you. You’re my girl forever. And if anyone’s clingy in this relationship, it’s quite obvious that it’s me” He joked, hoping to get a smile out of you. You laughed at his words, which resulted in a smile erupting on both your face and his. He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead before engulfing you in a hug.
“I love you. I can’t stand seeing you so upset like this. Plus the house was so lonely without you. Let’s go home?” He asked.
Home.
You always thought home was a physical place, a location. It turns out you’d found you home eight months ago.
“Home is wherever you are” You pressed a soft kiss to his lips before resting your head on his shoulder.
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BONUS
“By the way, you’ve made Pierre question whether or not walking a turtle is a real thing”
“If Pierre was confused, I know for a fact that Charles was just as confused. Plus I’ve seen people do it on TikTok, so I guess it’s a real thing”
“I also feel like they would be the type of people to actually walk around Monaco with a turtle on a leash”
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side note: rip to the pancake Y/n was making before Lando showed up
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taglist
@firehazardxx @judesgfirl @celestialams @xjval @chelseagirl98
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edensxgarden · 6 months
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HELP ME OH MY GOD
I need an Oscar smut , where he is soooo jealous, and he claims you after he heard in the paddock, that yn deserves a better bf and someone who isn't a rookie??
And then he wins his first gp, and fucks yn next to Lando's room, and the next day he is like wtff
I need Oscar to be dominant as fuck, saying things like "This pussy belongs to me", and like "no one can fuck this pussy but me" and choking(not just the hand placement, but the actual choking before cumming) kink too? Oh and lots of hand brusies and hickeys🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵
PLEASE HELP ME, I NEED THIS
You had no clue what had gotten into your boyfriend. 
Your heart fluttered the moment you heard the door of the hotel room open and shut with a quiet click. You had been feeling rather lonely all day, and you were anxiously waiting for your boyfriend to finally return home from testing, hoping to cuddle and maybe catch up on the newest episode of the true crime show you had been watching. 
But your plans quickly changed when Oscar entered the bedroom with a rather sour look on his face. Your refreshed smile quickly faded into a somewhat irritated scowl when you took in his unhappy appearance. "Osc, what's wrong?" 
He fully ignored your attempt to sympathize, making his way to the bed. He looked as if he were in a trance, properly pissed off. "Turn the fuck around," he hissed out.  
"Osc, what?" you questioned, but as you caught sight of the angry bulge settled in his pants, a light bulb went off and you suddenly realized what was going on with your usually well-mannered boyfriend, and you felt your cunt grow wet with anticipation.
You twisted your body, facing toward the headboard, and Oscar took no time shoving your head into the pile of plush pillows that sat atop the bed. He quickly went to rid you of your bottoms, nearly ripping your delicate panties and haphazardly tossing them somewhere in the room. 
He leaned down, face-to-face with your weepy cunt.  He whispered, so quietly you almost didn't hear him say, "Mine," before he dove in to eat you from the back like a madman. You couldn't even process his words when he had his tongue fucking into you like a man starved. 
He removed his tongue to shove two of his fat fingers into your pussy and moved the focus of his oral attack to your clit. He licked, bit, and sucked on the sensitive bud until you were practically screaming for him. Your legs shook beside his head, and it took everything in you not to suffocate him between your thighs. 
Your drool soaked the plush pillows, the soft fabric muffling your shrieking moans. With a particularly rough suck on your clit, you came on Oscar's tongue, your sweet juices creating a shiny coating on his face. He retreated from your clit to pepper large hickeys and bites onto your inner thighs, his rough fingers continuing to piston inside of you. 
Your ears were ringing, lost in a daze of pleasure, as your overstimulated body trembled like a leaf in Oscar's hold. Over your loud moans and muffled hearing from the pillow, you could just barely hear Oscar, but you could slightly make out what he was saying as he marked up your soft thighs. "My fucking girl. My pussy. All fucking mine." 
You nearly let out a moan at his words, his possessive words adding to the pleasure he was already giving you. You involuntarily let out a soft whine when he pulled away from your thighs, desperate to feel him close to you again. 
You were able to look at your angry boyfriend once more, and you were met with his nude body. You were too lost in pleasure to notice him undressing. 
Without warning, he summoned strength, even he himself didn't know he had, and picked you up from the bed. He carried you to the thin wall that separated his room from his teamates, pressing you against it and urging you to wrap your legs around his waist. 
Oscar slyly teased your enterence, sliding his tip across your soaking folds, brushing your sensitive clit every so often but never giving into what you so desperately craved. Your needy moans and whimpers grew with your arousal. 
Oscar halted his movements for a moment to glare at you with an unfamiliar look of rage in his eye before nearly growling out to you in his deepened, raspy voice, "Beg." 
It only took one word to make you an absolute pathetic mess. You were whining and pleading for him, tears threatening to fall from your anticipation and desperation for him. "Please, Oscar, fuck, I'll do anything! Just fuck me already, please, baby! I need your cock so fucking bad! Please, please, please ple-" 
Your pleas were interrupted by your loud scream of surprise and satisfaction when Oscar finally buried himself inside you, the burning stretch of his fat cock making you see stars. He barely gave you a moment to adjust before he was harshly fucking you against the wall, his dick reaching depths inside you you didn't think possible. 
You bit your lip in an effort to quiet the deafening moans coming from you, but Oscar was having none of that. He quickly moved one of his hands to your throat, squeezing just enough that your vision blurred, and he continued his ruthless thrusts. 
Oscar alleviated the pressure on your throat, leaving his hand wrapped around it. You sucked in a deep breath, the cold air filling your aching lungs. "Don't fucking do that. Let me hear how fucking good I'm making my desperate little slut feel." 
You nodded hastily, desperate to feel Oscar's hand constrict around your throat once more. The lack of oxygen added to the euphoria, and you felt absolutely lost in pleasure. "You're so fucking big, Osc! God, no one can fuck me like you, fuuuuuuckkk, so good~" you rambled on, letting your racing mind verbalize all your dirty thoughts. 
You felt each and every thick vein on Oscar's thick cock rub against your walls, and his fat tip pressed against your gspot in a way that had you nearly shrieking. The only other thing that could be heard in the room was the rapid echo of Oscar's heavy balls slapping against you with each harsh thrust. 
Oscar's breathing increased, and his heavy pants only spurred you on even further. "'m gonna fucking cum. Gonna fill up that sweet little pussy. My pretty fucking pussy, my pretty little slut." 
His harsh thrusts and filthy words pushed you towards your edge, your legs shaking around his waist as you let out a pornographic moan, your sweet cries flooding Oscar's ears as he came undone inside of you, emptying his aching balls in your cunt with a deep groan. 
~~~~~~
The next day, Oscar walked into the paddock with his chin up and a smug smirk glued to his face. He arrived in the McLaren garage for a meeting with the team, glaring daggers at Lando. However, his teammate couldn't even look at him, an uncomfortable blush dusting his cheeks when he was reminded of the lewd acts he'd overheard last night. 
On the way out, Oscar shoulder-checked him, nearly causing the Brit to stumble into some random furniture in the room. He shot Lando a fake smile, dripping with venom, as he whispered in his ear as he passed by, "Never say shit about me and my girlfriend ever again." 
He walked out, the self-satisfied smile never leaving his face, as he abandoned a very embarrassed Lando, who now knew, despite his usual levelheadedness, that Oscar Piastri was not one to be tested.
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punching-pentagrams · 3 months
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Love in a Hopeless Place
Chapter 5
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Sorry about that time I lied guys, I kept adding more to this than I thought I would, oh well. Enjoy me inserting my character into episode 5 basically lol. Also, your comments make me fucking cry, you guys are so sweet. I'm so glad you guys are enjoying this journey with me. xoxo, dany
Chapter 1|Chapter 2|Chapter 3|Chapter 4|Chapter 5|Chapter 6|Chapter 7|Chapter 8|Chapter 9
Lucifer x prostitute fem!reader Word Count: 4.6k CW: Slowburn, Prostitution, Hurt/comfort, trauma, fluff, cuddles, depression, anxiety, family drama
You find yourself just sitting there, staring at Lucifer, trying not to panic. Lucifer shifted in his seat nervously, waiting for you to say something, but the words wouldn't come. Well.. the ones that did had a lot of cussing and fear that you did not want to let out onto him. You propped your elbows on your knees and rested your head in your hands, and took some time to breath.
You start to ask yourself why Lucifer would think this was ok, but you didn't need to ask, you already knew the answer. You said you would be there for him for stuff like this, and he was taking you up on it. You just thought you would be helping him in the same way you had been already, talking through it and holding him through the pain, not that he would actually want you to go physically go with him to see his daughter. If you had a little more time to plan and process this, you probably would have found this more sweet, but right now, all you could think of was how the King of Hell was bringing you out not only in public, but to meet his daughter.
Lucifer sat and watched your silent panic, 'Shit, nice going Lucifer, you really didn't think this part through did you? Now you are going to ruin your relationship with your daughter and your fri- friend? Friend? Were you friends? Errr, not important right now! You were going to ruin these two relationships that you cared a lot about in one day?! What is wrong with you?!'
"(y/n)... darling I'm so-"
"What did I say about apologizing to me when it came to this stuff?" you interrupted looking up at him, now with a more calm determination on your face.
"Uhh... to not?"
You smiled, "Good boy."
A shiver ran up his spine, oh this interaction was getting confusing for him. Something seemed to switch in you in an instant, leaving him confused but, relieved?
You chuckled and sat back in your seat, "Ok, I just needed a moment," you rubbed your hands over your face and back through your hair, "A warning would have been nice, but it was not possible at the time, so I can move past that. I said I was here to support you, so that's what I'm going to do."
Lucifer felt a blush form across his face, "Oh! Well... good! Th-thank you."
You smile over at him, "Now, what exactly am I going to be walking into here?"
"Well... she is showing me around her hotel, she said he needed help with something, getting a meeting with... Heaven..." he made a displeased face and shivered, "I really don't know about that, but she wants to see me and... I'm going to see what I can do to help her. Look around and see what she has going," he said with a far away look in his eyes.
"A meeting with Heaven? Why?"
Lucifer sighed and leaned back in his chair to stare out the window, "She wants to rehabilitate sinners, try to get them into Heaven. Probably to combat the yearly, now bi-yearly exterminations."
You had heard of the exterminations, but had not yet been present for one yet, you had arrived a few days after the last one, then learned that the next one had been moved up to six months after that instead of a year. The deadline was coming up in about another month. But... rehabilitating sinners to get them into heaven? Was that... possible?
"Is that possible?" you decided to ask allowed, "Rehabilitation of souls?"
Lucifer remained looking out the car window, looking down, then back up at whatever he was looking at outside, "No."
Well... one of the possible wedges in their relationship was already starting to make sense. How long had Charlie been working on this? Had they talked about this much? Probably not, Lucifer seemed to already be shutting down at the conversation with you. You didn't think it would be helpful to dig more into his thoughts on this topic.
"Ok, so... how do you want me to help? You have normally wanted our relationship to remain pretty discreet, so I'm not sure what all I can do here."
Lucifer looked over at you, and then shifted to take your hand, "I just... I want you by my side. I don't know how many people will be there. I don't expect many. Also, I would be fine just saying you were a friend of mine who I wanted to bring with... if you are ok with me referring to you as such."
You. Friends with Lucifer. Even as a front, that was something. Did he really think of you as a friend at all? It almost felt like you guys were friends, you certainly spent more time with him than anyone else you would call a friend. Stop. Back to the point. You were playing the role of his friend here. Ya, you could do that. 'Oh hey Charlie! Hope it's ok that I joined your dad, we were already hanging out when you called and I just wanted to tag along and see this hotel of yours!' Ya. Ya! This could work.
You gave him a big smile, "Ok!"
He gave you a big smile back.
"But you are not leaving until you have a real conversation about trying to connect with her."
His smile faded back into nervousness, and he rolled his eyes, "Fine, I'll... I'll try."
You gave him a pat on the head and sat back in your seat. He remained holding onto your hand the rest of the car ride over.
_____________________________________________________________
The next couple of hours were... a lot. Charlie opened the door to the hotel and it was like a flip switched in Lucifer, he was talking a million miles a minute, full of charisma, hugging Charlie, looking around the hotel, greeting the members of the staff and guest, which there weren't a lot of, thank god.
Lucifer had quickly introduced you to Charlie as his friend, you gave you explanation that you had thought up earlier, and she bought it with a smile. Her energy was almost disgustingly sweet, the kind that made you want to pull away and gravitate towards at the same time. You could already see how similar they were, and it made you happy to see how happy he was to see Charlie, but both of their reactions also felt a little forced and over the top trying to interact with each other, both with a weight of anxiety clinging to their words and actions.
It also did not help that one of the staff, Alastor, the Radio Demon, was doing a lot to antagonize Lucifer in front of his daughter. You could tell that every action was meant to piss Lucifer off, it reeked of power play, but given how much it seemed that he actually supported Charlie you knew it was not a good place to step in. But seeing the way he toyed with Lucifer's already fragile emotions and relationship with Charlie made you hurt, and worry a little. You worried that Alastor might get in the way of these two getting a meaningful conversation. You resigned to standing over by the side and watched the interactions unfold in front of you.
At a certain point in the conversation, one of Alastor's old friends happened to barge into the hotel in the middle of the argument, briefly distracting Alastor. This day just seemed to keep getting weirder. You weren't used to being around this many other sinners in a social setting, and you tried as best as you could to hang out by the wall.
You were hoping that the new unexpected guest would distract Alastor long enough for Lucifer and Charlie to get sometime together. But no, Alastor sent his friend, Mimzy, over to talk with the rest of the staff while he walked back over to Charlie and Lucifer to continue their tour. Damn, this guy was nothing if not persistent to make Lucifer's time here all that much harder than it already was.
Lucifer gave you a look of 'Please save me and come with', you shook your head and tipped your head towards the stairs. You were here at the hotel with him, but he needed to have this conversation with Charlie without you. Also without the others, but who knows if that was going to happen at this point.
He sighed, knowing you were right, slapped the grin back on his face, and went upstairs with Charlie, Alastor, and Charlie's girlfriend, Vaggie. You made a note to yourself about the way Lucifer used his charisma as a coping mechanism, you already knew that, but here it was blaringly obvious to you.
The other members of the hotel, Husk, Angel Dust, Sir Pentious, and Niffty, joined Mimzy at the bar as they talked about her relationship with Alastor. After talking for a few minutes, you heard one of the voices yell out, "Hey toots, what about you? What's your story, eh?" You look over to see Angel Dust and Husk looking at you.
'Oh crap. What do I say to them?' You stare blankly at them for a couple seconds. You had no problem talking to them, but seeing Angel Dust here made you a little nervous, he was one of Valentino's boys. Sure, porn and prostitution were not exactly the same, but there was some amount of overlap in the community. Luckily, you thought it would be more likely for you recognize him, than it would be for him to recognize you. He was a big star in the industry, and prostitutes don't get their name spread as easily unless they were really popular or also doing porn on this side.
"What, is the "friend of his royal highness" too good for us, or somethin'?" Angel scoffed at you.
You shook your head, "Oh! No, I'm sorry, how rude of me. Sorry you just looked familiar and I was trying to place from where."
Angel turned out more towards you with a smirk, "Ah, you a fan a' my work, baby? I'm Angel Dust, the famous pornstar" he said adjusting his chest fluff with his lower two arms and looking at you with sultry eyes.
"Right! That makes sense. I do believe I have seen... some of your work," you try to act a little sheepish as you walk a little closer to them.
"No need to be shy, baby, nothin' wrong with enjoyin' a little porn," Angel purred. You again try to act sheepish and brush away the comment.
"So uhh, Husk was it?" you said addressing the bartender.
"Ya, nice to meet you. (y/n), was it?" he said flatly, eyeing you suspiciously.
"Uh, yup!" You saw with a bit of nervousness. Why was he looking at you like that? Did he recognize you? Or was he just sizing up someone who came in here claiming to be a friend of the King? You couldn't tell. It was because he could tell you were being fake, but you didn't know that, and he was not about to tell you.
"Cool", he looked quickly over at Mimzy with a glare, who was currently preoccupied my Niffy, "Excuse me for a minute," and he disappeared upstairs.
"Don't mind him," said Angel, "He's a bit of a sour-puss at first, but he gets better when you get to know him. Trust me." Angel said with a smile and a wink.
You and Angel continued to talk for a while longer, he was actually really funny and easy to talk to. You wished it wasn't necessary for you to keep your secret about your relationship with Lucifer, you didn't think you could mention your profession without giving that away. Luckily, Angel didn't ask about what you did for work, he mostly asked about what it was like to be friends with Lucifer, and you gave him as some indirect answers but tried to keep it interesting. Stuff like his duck room, stuff that Lucifer wouldn't mind you talking about. He asked how you both met, you make up some story about how you had been hired to do something around his house, you ended up talking and hit it off, which was not entirely untrue. You just left out how the job was fucking him, and that it had spiraled into the much more complex and wonderfully confusing relationship that you two had today.
Angel picked up that something felt off about your story, but had been working on that whole "boundaries" thing with Husk, so he figured it was better not to push. Especially with someone he had just met. Besides, he liked you so far, he hoped you would come back around, and didn't really want to see what down happen if he pissed of the friend of the King of Hell.
During your conversation, Husk had come back down behind the bar, looking a little shaken. You and Angel didn't have time to ask before someone started... trying to ram down the front door?!
Lucifer, Charlie, and Vaggie quickly teleported back into the lobby. 'Could Lucifer teleport? What the fuck?' At the same time, Alastor emerged from the floor from a pile of shadows on the floor of the lobby.
Apparently, Mimzy had fucked with some of the Sharks and then ran here to hide. Awesome, didn't like her anyway. Lucifer was being, very short and dismissive about the situation towards Charlie, not doing anything about it while Alastor went out and dealt with the Sharks.
"Mhmm, you see? What'd I tell you?" Lucifer said, as Charlie stared out the now broken front doors of the hotel at the battle outside, "Charlieeee. Sinners are violent psychopaths, hell-bent on causing as much pain a destruction as they can. There is really no point in tryin-"
"Dad, stop!" Charlie interrupted, "He is defending this hotel. It may be a little more... sadistic than I'd hoped, but he's doing it for me! How come he can have faith in me but my own father can't?!"
The hotel fell silent as the violence outside came to and end, Alastor looking out at his job well done and dealing with Mimzy. Angel whispered something to Husk and... pulled out some popcorn? There was too much going to begin to start unpacking that.
This was Lucifer's chance to be open and honest, to try to repair the rift and find some understanding between them. He needed to be vulnerable with her, which was the thing he was most scared of. He looked over to you, looking for guidance. You returned a sharp look of 'Dude, fucking TALK TO HER, be fucking REAL WITH HER, for the fucking love of GOD.'
He sighed, and he took the first step into rebuilding his relationship with his daughter, which involved about being honest and vulnerable about how he had tried this all before, trying to rehabilitate sinners, and how Heaven and its order scared this living hell out of him. And even more so, how he was scared of losing her in the process, telling her how much he loved her.
This was part of the story he hadn't even told you yet.
Charlie responded with her own feelings about growing up distant for him but loving him through their small bits of connection, the stories and dreams he would share with her, and how it had sparked her own dreams that she now fought for. The dream to save her people, more than anything.
You watched as Lucifer started to soften, and together they opened up about wanting to know each other, wanting to work together, wanting to achieve their dreams together, and not let life try to pull them apart again. You even got to see his big, beautiful angel wings for the first time, which were an incredible sight to see. Their discussion ended in hugs and tears.
"Ok," Lucifer said ending the long hug, "I can get you the meeting, but once you're in Heaven... I won't be able to go with you... Will you be ok?"
Charlie took Lucifer's hands with a smile, "I'll be fine."
Lucifer smiled back, "That's my girl."
Lucifer looked over at you, "(y/n), I uhh... should probably go work on this now, I don't know how long it will take, should I take you home or..."
"I... could stay here longer... If that is ok with you? And everyone else, of course," you said looking around at the others, mostly Charlie and Angel, who both smiled at you. You looked back at Lucifer, who nodded.
"Ok, I'll come back for you when I am done. Thanks for being flexible," he smiled warmly, with eyes that seemed to flicker with a spark of life you had yet to see in him.
"No problem, now get this girl that meeting," you said looking at Charlie with a smile, "she's got some lives to change."
Charlie beamed back a smile at you, then looked at Lucifer. He sighed, tapped his can on the ground and softly said, "Good luck kiddo," as he disappeared in a swirling cloud of red smoke. The room goes silent, outside of Charlie and Vaggie briefly talking and holding either other in a sweet embrace.
"So," you say, addressing Charlie after she finished her moment with Vaggie, "What does a girl gotten do to get a tour of this fabulous establishment of yours, Miss Morningstar?" You say with a flicker of playful mischief in your eyes. Charlie beams you another award winning smile as she extends a hand out to you, inviting you to follow her.
"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel!"
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You spent the rest of the evening getting a tour from Charlie and Vaggie, and talking with the others at the hotel. It wasn't anything fancy, but the company was nice and it was so funny to see how much Charlie was like her father, except for her spirit had not been broken yet as his had. You prayed that it never would, because it was beautiful to watch. You couldn't help but feel both jealous and inspired by her.
Was this how Lucifer used to be before all of the pain he endured? You hoped now that she was back in his life that this part of him would light up again, without all of the fake smiles and hidden tears behind locked doors. If that light you saw in his eyes was any indication, you were pretty sure it was already starting.
Alastor seemed less interested in giving a tour now that Lucifer was not around to torment, but you could tell he was also sizing you up a little and putting on a little bit of a show for you with a story and a big smile. You would laugh but not get too pulled into his antics or get tripped up by him, which seemed to entertain him a little as well as agitate him.
Angel and Husk seemed amused and impressed by how you could keep up with Alastor, while Niffty ran around cleaning and asked if Lucifer was always so boring or if he was more of a "Bad Boy" with you. You just laughed and told her that he could have his moments, Niffty lit up and gave you a maniacal giggle in response as she went back to hunting cockroaches. You looked at the others, Angel shrugged, "Don't try too hard to figure her out, you might get a headache." You laughed, and spent some more time talking with Husk and Angel, Husk seemed to warm up to you the more you talked, but you could tell he would eye you a little whenever you were "putting on more of an act". He must be good at reading people, you respected that, but also knew that would make some interactions hard.
Angel was easy to talk to, he was full of energy, loved gossip, and never ran out of stories, many of them centered around his work and his boss, Valentino, but Husk would try to reel him in so that he wouldn't get to heated in front of "new people". You wished you could talk with him about your job, not that bonding over trauma was the healthiest thing to do, but Angel seemed to care a little bit more about others than you expected, everyone here did. Even Alastor, in his own... unique ways.
Could redemption really be possible? You knew Lucifer said it wasn't, but even just by being around this group, you felt that they weren't like other sinners. They were... kinder, especially Charlie and Vaggie. You weren't used to bonding with others well, in hell or when you were alive, but this... this felt different.
This hotel had something special. Maybe... maybe you could... try out the hotel too? Who knows about redemption, but this would be way nicer than living above the brothel. Would that be possible? Uhh... that might make things complicated with Lucifer. But maybe... could you quit the brothel? Work and live here? Just be friends with him? Or... more?
'Whoa...'
'What?'
You shook your head '...that was weird.' Anyways, you were getting a little swept up in the moment, best to not get swept up in the fantasy of moving here. You would have to think about it, didn't want to make things more complicated than they were already starting to be. Plus, you had no idea yet how Charlie's meeting with Heaven would go. The hotel could be blown off the face of the circle by like... Angel Nukes or whatever. Probably best to see how this pans out.
Eventually, Lucifer would arrive back at the hotel in his swirling vortex of red clouds. Charlie ran over to her father, asking how it went. He gave her a thumbs up and a tired smile, "All set up." Charlie smiled with tears in her eyes, as she gave her dad a big squishy hug and thanked him profusely. Lucifer lit up in a smile as her hugged her back.
After a few minutes, they released each other from their long embrace, and Lucifer looked over at you, "I hope these hooligans didn't cause you too much trouble while I was away."
You smile from your seat at the bar, still next to Angel and Husk, "Nope, just the right about of trouble actually," you say looking at the two sitting with you, and then out at the others.
"Good. Well, it's time to head back, are you ready?" Lucifer said, you nodded and starting saying your goodbyes, hugging those that wanted one, mostly Charlie, but also Vaggie and Angel Dust, and waved goodbye to the others. You saw Alastor eyeing you and Lucifer with a sinister grin as Lucifer snaked an arm around you, preparing to activate another teleportation.
You quickly call out to Alastor, he narrows his eyes at you in curiosity, "Keep up the good work buddy, and never lose that smile! You know you're never fully dressed without one!" The last thing you saw before being enveloped in smoke was Alastor's impossibly wide smile somehow splitting into a further, more devious, jagged smile across his wicked face. Before you knew it, you were back in Lucifer's room.
Lucifer looked at you with playful irritation, "Why did those have to be your parting words?"
You shrugged, "As a challenge, if he is going to make your life miserable, I'm just going to do it back whenever I get the chance. It'll be fun!"
Lucifer rolled his eyes with a groan. He then picked you up and starting carrying you towards the bed, "Already missy, time for you to do your job." Being suddenly picked up had you responding with a startled laugh. For how small his statue was, you would constantly forgot how strong he was, he just always looked so fragile and meek when he was sleeping in your lap.
You look up at him from his arms, pushing down the urge to just stare at the details of his beautiful face from this angle.
"That bad, huh?"
"Yup," he said, putting you down on the bed and crawling up into his spot on your lap, wrapping his arms around you waist and nuzzling his head on your shoulder. You enclose your arms around him and play with his hair.
"You wanna talk about it?"
Lucifer shook his head into your neck, "Cuddles now, talk later."
"Fair enough," you say as you hold him close. You feel the tension from his body slowly melt off away in your arms, until he was almost asleep.
As Lucifer laid in your arms, trying to fight off the taxing day of both seeing his daughter again for the first time in forever, getting the pleasure of Alastor, and dealing with Heaven's irritating meeting request system (where he mostly had to wait until the staff stopped screaming before he could even make his request and start talking to anyone that could begin setting up the process of scheduling a meeting) ... it had actually been a good day. Like... a really good day. One of the best days he has had in... what felt like forever. The meeting had him a little nervous, but, he had his daughter back, and he was going to do everything to make sure he supported her and never had to live without her again. For the first time, he felt like he could actually start rebuilding some sort of a relationship with her. It would take time, but it was worth it.
He then looked up at you, your beautiful (e/c) eyes, the hero of his day. Since the day he met you and every day since. He didn't want to put you on a pedestal, he knew you weren't perfect, but he didn't want you to be. God, did you feel like the best thing that had happened to him in a long time. As far as he was concerned, you were his friend, maybe even a best friend, maybe even... errr... something greater than a best friend! ...whatever that could be. He knew he couldn't tell you that, but he felt it in his heart. He wanted to believe that you wouldn't have done all of this just because it was your job.
"Hey," he said sleepily, "Thank you for coming with me... I needed that... I needed her back... my Charlie... and now... I'm getting happy again... and its all... because of... you..." Lucifer then, guess what? Feel asleep.
His words made your breath catch. It took everything in you not to start shaking as the tears started to roll down your face, as he slept in your arms. Today felt like such a victory for you, well for him, but also for you. You felt like you had actually done something worth while, something that meant meaningful for once. You were able to help this beautiful, sweet, kind, loving, angelic creature start to find hope and connection again.
The best part of all was that he, in return, had started to give you hope again too.
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353 notes · View notes
i-am-a-fan · 9 days
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I saw a post talking about how there’s a deep mischaracterization of Mk in the fandom specifically about his monkey form and I’m here to dissect it. (WIth doodles!)
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Tldr: Will Mk end up hurting his family in season 5 due to his new Monkey form? Most likely no, but it is possible that he indirectly hurts them by not understanding the limits of his power.
First things first let’s collect a list of attributes that we know Mk has from past seasons. This will serve as a spine or checklist to see if certain actions are possible. A thing to keep in mind though is the ranking of each attribute as the writers of LMK wrote there are characters as complex and sometimes abandon certain character values if their center value is threatened. 
Mk’s character value list (in my opinion) is as follows: 
-Family 
-Strength 
-Freedom 
-Dependability 
with family and strength being so close to each other, so sometimes strength ends up as Mk’s main concern. Of course, all of these end up mixing at times and in the first seasons we see the mixing of these values gets him in trouble 
Desiring the freedom of choice over listening to Wukong (Pig Pong Panic). Wanting to be dependable but overestimating his strength (Duplication). Wanting to be strong but forgets his family in the process (shadow play). Eventually, he gets his priorities in check and has ended up sticking to this list for most of seasons 3 and 4. 
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Now his flaws (in no particular order): 
Impulsivity 
Forgetfulness 
Stubbornness 
Blind devotion 
He’s overcome a lot of these when he was forced to learn them in season 3. His stubbornness to not tell anyone what was happening with the LBD got people hurt. His impulsivity with his actions ended up crashing the ship, and almost sold his family to a goldfish demon.
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(Text: Mk's Fault, Good Intentions, Trying mentor)
So he’s had to come up with methods of working around that. Mk’s blind devotion to Wukong almost got Mei killed, and we see how he changes because of it. At the end of season 3, Mk doesn’t explicitly say that he sees Wukong in a new light but he heavily implies it with the metaphor of a bowl of noodles. 
So… Will Mk go crazy and end up hurting his friends? 
I highly doubt it. While I toyed with the idea, Mk is a lot smarter than the fandom usually gives him credit for. He knows Wukong is flawed, and he still trusts in him because he knows Wukong is trying. Mk has faith in Wukong’s strength and the fact that Wukong also heavily values family, even if his isolation makes it a lot harder for him to do so. Just rewatch the ending of season 3 where Wukong apologizes to Mk and watch as Mk comes to the realization that Wukong is trying so hard to make up for his past. (They also drive this point home in season 4 with how disappointed Wukong sounds at himself for not finding Mk in the scroll in the season finale.) 
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(Text: He's flawed and trying, Has to accept harsh reality, Dissociating Coping mechanism)
So what about Mk’s impulsivity? I doubt that’d be something that directly harms his friends. He’s worked on his impulsivity by working with others (Redson in season 3 and Mei’s planning in season 4) to help fill in the gaps in his plans. In order for his impulsivity to harm others, you’d have to break that family value first or raise that value of strength and freedom. Most likely this flaw can manifest in Mk overdoing his Monkey form ™  and sending a shockwave that accidentally hurts the people around him.  Probably manifesting either in training or while having fun with Mei (think about how Mk was in the Bad Weather episode). 
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Okay, what if Mk is tricked into it like he was in Season 4 (back to the flaw of blind devotion)? Mk has spent every season backstabbed by someone he trusted. We see him snap at Azure after he finds out that he was going to keep Wukong in the scroll. He snaps at Macaque in season 4. It’s safe to say that he’s learned, at least partially, to not trust others so blindly. Mk is also supposed to have gotten the “skill of self-reflection” in “Revenge of the Spider Queen” but his reflecting has mostly just impacted the other flaws. 
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(Text: Side note, Monkey Mk doesn't have a nose)
But there is one possibility I toy with, bottled up emotions. Mk has extremely big emotions but hates showing any emotion that can be seen as negative. He loves being happy and he’s not afraid to show it, but as soon as those emotions turn to doubt, anger, or sadness he bottles them up fast. He knows he can rely on his family, but he’s stubborn and thinks that his emotions aren’t worth that hassle. Take the ending of season 3 where Mk states that “he tries not to think too hard” about his own place in the universe, which could be due to a fear of losing the value of freedom if he has a specific role to play in the universe.
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(Text: Guys He's so avoidant, forced to think about his identity, 18-early 20's and Identity crisis)
It’s worsened by the fact that every. other. character. avoids. their. emotions. No other characters in this series are open about their emotions except Tang and Sandy. And from season 3 (and a bit of season 4) we know that Mk doesn’t view Tang in an extremely positive light.
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Not exactly negative, but his admiration lies more on the rest of the team. Macaque points this out in season 2 stating in “Shadow Play” that Mk should talk out his insecurities, but no one else does that. 
That being said Mk isn’t entirely forgetful either. Macaque was a season 1 villain with his betrayal going through season 3. Mk’s high value of family, and flaw of blind devotion, make him want to give him a chance as Macaque’s past is connected with Wukong’s. HOWEVER, Mk is also stubborn and hasn’t forgiven Macaque’s actions. That’s why he snaps, plus the fact that Macaque is terrible at direct communication. Like I said before, Mk won’t directly hurt anyone he cares about, but if his monkey form is highly connected with his emotions (as most magic tends to be) having those bottled-up insecurities might accidentally cause Mk to unleash more power than he means to.
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(Text: Normal, Fed up Meter, rage (on jar))
I have no idea where season 5 is going to go, but I’m so excited about the possibilities. 
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(Text: Terrified of his actions hurting his family. UNSTABLE!!!)
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eriexplosion · 13 days
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Yesterday everyone was posting their feelings on TBB. I'm glad I waited, because there's a lot swirling around. Cut for negativity again.
I was introduced to The Bad Batch in August 2022 and fell instantly in love. The characters, the story, the complex family dynamics, they all spoke to me. I wasn't even a Star Wars fan but I went through and devoured The Clone Wars, Rebels, The Mandalorian, all of it. I threw myself into this world and adored every second of it. I must have rewatched season one over five times before season two even came out.
When season two premiered I loved it. Every Tuesday night I stayed up until the episode drop and devoured it immediately. I looked ahead at the schedule and took days off work for the double episodes, for the big Crosshair episodes - he was my favorite early on and season two only made that grow. But season two also really brought Tech into my radar even more. I had always liked him, but here he was shining. The Crossing really solidified it, as an autistic person. I'd never heard someone describe the difference in processing so succinctly before, so clearly, and it spoke to me like very little had. Here was a character that was like me. Here was a character that I needed when I was an undiagnosed child, someone that would have made me feel like I had at least some way of describing my differences.
Then, well. He died. It was an affecting scene, but it felt out of nowhere, it felt unfinished. Tech didn't even get the climax of the episode. He just fell into the clouds, the Batch grieved for a few minutes, and then the plot steamrolled right along.
I didn't believe it, not after the mad scientist presented his goggles and claimed not to salvage anything else. It seemed like such an obvious fake out. The longer I sat with it the less satisfying it felt. It felt so brushed over, so pointless, all for a mission that they accomplished nothing on. Then came the social media circus. Again and again his fall was shoved in our faces on Twitter, demanding we stream it. TikToks were made that were so out of touch they felt like parodies, the wound ripped open again and again, and I thought surely there had to be a purpose to it.
So I waited for season 3 as interviews were done that seemed to almost intentionally avoid calling him dead. As tweets were made promising we'd be so fulfilled if we could only see who was onscreen in the mid-season! (A tweet that immediately garnered dozens of people hoping it referred to Tech, all without a single comment to try and quell the speculation.) It felt already like we were being toyed with, but I thought it had to be for a reason or a purpose. More weirdly vague discussions went up about his Sacrifice, his Fall, his Anything But Death, even as everyone insists that it was so meaningful, the way he died on a mission that accomplished nothing. Jokes were made around Valentines Day.
He Fell For You, get it?
The first official use of killed went up on the databank right after the trailer, on Hunter's page of all places. The first time the interviews used dead was the Friday before the premier. It all felt too late, theories had already grown for months by that point.
Season 3 finally came and I waited up for every episode drop just like I did for season 2, hoping for him to come back or at least for him to be properly grieved, since we had barely a couple of minutes in Plan 99 before it was swept away for the next plot point. Surely Tech's impact deserved an episode of focus, if he were really gone.
The previously on plays his last words twice. But then we skip months into the future. We don't see Crosshair find out the news - even though Tech died on a mission to retrieve him. We don't watch Omega grieve. She barely seems to notice she's missing a brother. We got a brief allusion in episode two. It took three episodes to even mention his name in passing. Five episodes in everyone got their chance to look sad about him, but only for a few seconds and only when his skills were relevant. Compared to the gorgeous callback to Mayday in the same episode, it felt shallow. He had to have been more important than this didn't he?
Episodes 6 & 7 felt like maybe there was a reason. We see a new masked assassin that gets extra focus, who got put through a series of Tech-adjacent situations, whose beef with Crosshair was just a little too personal, who survived longer than all the rest but stayed masked. Rex talks about losing brothers, but Hunter says nothing about the brother they lost. I hoped it all meant something, that this was the reason that he felt so much like he was thrown away, so that he could come back in.
More one off mentions that only really come up when it's about how useful Tech would have been. More poking at the wound that still felt open and raw because we'd never gotten any closure. The closest we get is a single scene in episode eleven, so late in the season and so brief that I thought that couldn't possibly be it.
CX-2 comes back, and he talks like Tech. He's still not unmasked. I really need him to be something because otherwise what was it all for?
The most emotion comes in Juggernaut, from Phee. Its a highlight because it actually feels like it was about him, like he mattered as a person. It's episode twelve and we finally talk about him like a person. We never saw her get the news either.
Episodes thirteen and fourteen pass without any mentions at all. We're running out of time. Episode 15 hits and we get one raw one from Crosshair that Clone Force 99 died with Tech. It's the first time they directly say he's dead in so many words. It's the season finale. CX-2 is a nobody it turns out, and he dies faceless. Everyone gets a happy ending and after over a year of wondering if we'd ever get closure, it turns out Tech's just dead. But look how happy everyone else is!
Everyone gets to grow old. Except the autistic one of course. He's just dead and it hardly feels like it mattered at all. Did you know Wrecker and Hunter don't use his name once in season three? Omega and Echo mention him once each. Crosshair twice, only once with any emotion behind it. Phee tops the charts at three mentions, two by name and one by nickname. We see his goggles four times. I kept count.
There was never a bigger plan, this was just all he was worth. We spent two seasons on Crosshair's absence. We spent a whole episode dealing with it when Echo decided to go with Rex. Tech dies though and all his life amounted to was a handful of mentions when his skills would have been useful, some shots of his broken goggles, and endless cooing out of the text over how meaningful his sacrifice was. Too meaningful to take back, of course, even as Ventress is brought back from her own sacrifice.
I had really, really thought that this time autistic life would be worth more than autistic death. That a character that felt so carefully handled couldn't have just been thrown away for shock value, barely to even be mentioned again, his memory used to string us along to keep us watching. If you added up every mention and shot through season 3 it might actually clock in at less time than was spent on Mayday's send off.
I'm an adult. I'll survive, though the sting of seeing yet another character like me used as a stepping stone for everyone else's happy ending will take a while to fade. But I think about the child I used to be who needed a character like Tech. And I think about how it would have felt to actually get that only to watch him die a handful of episodes later as a side note to his family's story, barely even mentioned again. How badly it would have hurt, how deep it would have scarred.
I'm not that child anymore. But there are a lot of autistic kids out there that are the same as I used to be, and they're learning for the first time that people like us don't get happy endings. Instead they die so that everyone around them can rise up, and they might even get mentioned a few times. But don't worry. Everyone will tell you how meaningful and special it is and how delusional you were to ever hope for anything else.
The Bad Batch still means a lot to me. I think it always will. I love the characters. I love the family, and all the potential they had. But the sting of not belonging in this happy ending is there, and it's deep. It's been a long time since I trusted a show. It'll be a long time before I risk trusting another. And I hope that the autistic kids trying to learn how to close their hearts off behind new walls are doing okay.
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daenerysies · 19 days
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deep diving into the episode three line from rhaenyra, “no one is here for me,” and how if the takeaway from that scene is that rhaenyra is a selfish brat you aren’t proficient enough to do anything past surface-level reading.
in episode one rhaenyra expresses to alicent that she hopes her father gets his son, “for as long as i can recall it’s all he’s wanted.” which leads us (the audience) to understand that while rhaenyra loves both of her parents she feels ostracized from her father (and mayhaps even her mother, to some extent, because of her constant pregnancies) due to his ‘need’ for a son to continue the targaryen dynasty. she is a daughter, only seen as valuable for her womb, which is evidenced that she knows about when talking to her mother. rhaenyra wishes to be a knight and ride off to battle and glory, with aemma giving her a gentle reality check on her lot in life. she does not want to serve the same purpose as her mother.
aemma dies near the end of the episode, with viserys ordering her butchered for the chance that his long-awaited male heir might live. this is a violent and gruesome scene, followed by rhaenyra not even being given the privilege of hearing her mother’s death first. she is instead relegated to members of the small council being alerted, even corlys and rhaenys learning about this before her, she is a silent member on the sidelines. she does not know the extent of what has happened, but she knows that something is wrong.
we have to think about how she learns of her mother’s fate. did otto tell her? did rhaenys? did viserys? did she see her mother’s body ripped open? did she see the bloody sheets left at the scene? was she allowed to hold baby baelon, considering he didn’t die immediately? was she there when he took his last breath? maybe it would bring her some comfort, she didn’t get to say goodbye to her mom. maybe she held him until he passed. did her father offer any explanation? we’ll never know, but these are all such heavy questions in regards to what she experienced that day. she’s fourteen, has spent her entire life watching her mother grieve dead baby after dead baby, losing little bits of herself in the process. it’s no wonder this was a traumatizing period for her, fueling her want (her need) to not be shackled down by marriage and childbirth.
even at her mother and brother’s funeral she isn’t allowed to just grieve, to just be. she has to hold her head high, she has to comfort her father, she has to order their corpses burned. was her father happy for the few hours he had a son? she wouldn’t know, she never will be that for him. how long does he spend wallowing is his self pity? he reprimands daemon for not being there for his niece, but where was he, her father? he banishes daemon, takes comfort from his daughter’s best friend. he finally comes to her, tells her of a great danger rising from the north; from my blood comes the prince that was promised, his will be the song of ice and fire. she hasn’t heard from him in days, a targaryen must be seated on the iron throne to unite the realm against the cold and the dark. her mother is dead, and he has wasted the years since she was born wanting a son. she is now enough, her mother never was.
it has now been six months since her mother's death (murder), and she has been heir the *entire* time. her father won't talk to her, she is still the cupbearer for the small council. lord corlys is angry about a war he says has cost him, the crown will not help. she suggests they use dragons, a show of force against their enemies. her father admonishes her, "it isn't that simple, rhaenyra." he allows the lords at the table to belittle her efforts. the only one appreciative is corlys, "at least the princess has a plan." otto says there are better uses for her talents, she has been heir to the iron throne for six months. she's been given the chance to choose a future kingsguard, she wants one with actual combat experience. the hand is exacerbated, she is firm in her decision. ser criston cole will be the replacement for ser ryam redwyne.
alicent has been visiting her father in his private chambers secretly, corlys wants his daughter to be the next queen. viserys begins openly courting lady laena of house velaryon. rhaenyra and alicent visit the sept, she expresses her worry, her mother has only dead for half a year. the lords seek to replace her, alicent convinces her that she cannot worry about the plots of lords and men, she is the heir, however. why shouldn't she worry? she misses her mother.
she meets with her father, he reassures her, "i loved your mother very much." she apologizes for speaking out of turn at the small council meeting, he tells her she will learn (will he be the one to teach her, though?) daemon has taken a dragon's egg and seized dragonstone, bringing news of his future marriage to lady mysaria. the king means to go himself to stop him, otto will not let him. daemon took baelon's egg. rhaenyra is angry. she reaches dragonstone just after otto's party, she knows they were about to come to blows. she confronts daemon, she is the reason he was disinherited. if he kills her, he'd be done with all this bother. daemon scoffs, walking away from her. he throws the egg whilst still retreating. rhaenyra smiles and leaves. her father is mad once he learns what she's done. she left without his permission, but she retrieved the egg and prevented bloodshed, he should be pleased with her efforts. otto would never have been able to accomplish what she did, he relents.
rhaenys lectures her about the order of things. the realm will never accept a woman ascending the iron throne, but it's different for her. her father is the king, rhaenys' father dies as a prince. her father made the lords of the realm swear obeisance to her, rhaenys never had such a thing. the lords chose viserys over rhaenys at the great council, viserys has not given them a choice. rhaenys is the the queen who never was, rhaenyra is the queen to be. when she is queen she will create a new order, rhaenys warns there will be war (unfortunately she is right).
another meeting takes place between father and daughter. he must take a new wife, someone to help propagate the targaryen line. they are vulerable, to easily ended. rhaenyra understands, it is his duty as king. obviously he will marry laena, the daughter of one of the most powerful houses in the realm and of pure valyrian stock, it is a fine match. alicent is still visiting her father in secret.
her father calls a small council meeting, he means to announce his next wife. rhaenyra is ready, she gave him her blessing (why is alicent here? she never has been before.) her father starts speaking, "i intend to marry... the lady alicent hightower." corlys is enraged, otto is pleased, alicent is anxious. rhaenyra was ready, it has all fallen apart. alicent is her best friend, that friendship dies before her very eyes. she runs from the room.
it has been two years. viserys and alicent are married, and they have a son, with one more baby on the way. the boy's name is aegon, it is his second birthday. he has past his infancy, the lords believe it is only a matter of time until the king names him heir, rhaenyra is well aware of this. the queen visits the godswood where rhaenyra sits. she overrides rhaenyra's authority, commanding the singer to leave. she states the king wishes for her to join them, he wants them to have fun as a family. they do not need her to celebrate his long-awaited son. it is the king's command, she leaves unhappily. alicent wishes for things to be different, rhaenyra knows they never can be.
together they all sit, traveling towards the kingswood. rhaenyra asks after alicent's well-being, viserys reminds her that she will be in this position sooner than late (the same position that killed her mother). "it isn't so bad, the days are long but aegon came quickly and without fuss." the queen states. rhaenyra is hurt, she tries not to show it. the king reminds her she has duties, rhaenyra retorts sarcastically. how long will these duties last, once her father names alicent's son as heir over her? her life will be forfeit before long. no one is here for her.
"no one is here for me." translates to "no one has been here for me. i’ve been alone and angry and terrified for years. i am my father’s heir, but what does that mean? what will it cost? you put me here. daemon put me here. alicent put me here. you have a son now, he outlived baelon and my other siblings. how long until i am cast aside again? made to be some petty lord's wife, made to be a broodmare until it kills me? i don't want to end up like my mother. this heirship is all i have. it will soon no longer be mine. i'm only seventeen. no one is here for me."
rhaenyra is never shown the same amount of grace as alicent for her strifes and anguish in life, for the fact that she too was a child from episodes one through five. rhaenyra might not have been a child bride, but she still spent her life being told she was never enough. she was not a boy, she could not be the heir, her father needed an heir. he kills her mother for it, he ignores her unless she can benefit him. he makes her believe that he will marry laena, only to blindside her by marrying alicent. she realizes alicent has been lying to her for months. her father continues to undermine her throughout the years. he names her heir to spite daemon, which she admits she knows about in episode two. he allows the lords to ignore her. it takes him two years to reassure her he won't replace her. rhaenyra is an angsty teen who has seemingly lost everything and has no support to counter that. she is not upset that no one showed up to a two-year-olds birthday party with her in mind, she is upset that her father continuously overlooks her, that he takes and takes and takes everything from her. he took her mother, he took daemon, he took alicent, he had a son. she has not been able to catch a break due to her father's selfishness. in all honesty, she should have acted out worse, maybe burn everything to the ground. viserys would deserve it, she was far too lenient with him.
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Note
Hello. I left a request with Crosshair the other day, but seeing the down state of my boy Hunter in this new season I had to come here to leave another one. So the idea is Hunter x F! Reader (with established relationship?) where on the mission to capture the Pike, she gets hurt and has to stay in Pabu. So when he and Wrecker come back with the cadets, they have a moment of comfort together, you know? It's clear that Wrecker is trying hard to keep Hunter sane, so maybe the reader is too? Xx
Hello lovely! Thank you for the request. I had a lot of fun with this one - he looked so tired and sad in that episode 😔 x
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Whispers of Home's Embrace
Hunter has always been calm and strategic, but with Omega's prolonged absence, he's unraveling at the seams, working himself into the ground. It's a good thing you're there to slow him down, and remind him that neglecting himself in the process isn't healthy.
Pairing: Hunter x f!reader
Word count: 2.1k
Warnings: slight spoilers for S3E02, fluff, sweetness, comfort, pet names.
Translations: ri’vod - sibling in law
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A light breeze wafted in through the open window, the late afternoon sun flooding the kitchen as you hummed along to the music from the small radio on the window ledge, adding the final touches of icing to the cupcakes you’d baked.
Capturing the Pyke who’d brought dishonour to Roland wasn’t easy, and you’d paid a small price for it. Whereas Hunter and Wrecker had their old armour to keep them safe, you didn’t, preferring the manoeuvrability you had with softer protection.
Unfortunately, that had meant the blow the Pyke had struck to your side while you’d been wrestling him into submission had cracked a rib. Hunter’s fist had met his face seconds later, rendering him unconscious. Still, the boys had insisted on returning you to Pabu before they took him to Roland and collected the information you all desperately needed.
With nothing but time, you’d turned your focus to more domestic tasks to drown out your worry. Hunter and Wrecker were more than capable, but it felt wrong for them to be without you. You’d been with them since the very beginning.
Lost in a haze of icing, you almost missed the sound of the front door opening. Quietly, you placed down the piping bag, fingers sliding around the hilt of the knife you’d left on the counter. You weren’t expecting guests.
Moving silently across the kitchen, you pressed your back against the wall beside the door, hiding yourself from view. As the footsteps drew nearer, you held your breath, tension coiling in your muscles. The familiar creak of the floorboards announced the intruder’s approach. Your grip tightened on the knife, your heart pounding in your chest. Then, a soft voice broke the silence, dispelling the tension like a gentle breeze dispersing fog.
“Hey, it’s just me.” Came Hunter’s familiar voice, concern evident in his tone. Relief flooded through you, and you released a shaky breath, lowering the knife as you stepped out of your hiding spot. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you.” Hunter chuckled, his expression softening as he took in the scene before him - the cupcakes, the radio playing softly in the background, and you, with a hint of flour dusting your cheek.
You shook your head, dismissing his apology with a wave. “No worries, it’s…”
“You live here!?” An unfamiliar voice interrupted your apology, and you watched Hunter step aside, revealing three young boys who were decidedly dirty and a little malnourished.
Wrecker barreled into the kitchen behind them, a giant grin on his face. “Smells good in here, ri’vod!”
Confused, you look at the three young boys and then back to Hunter. “Who are they?” You ask, wafting your knife in their direction.
“Regs. We found a bombed-out Imperial base. They escaped and were fending for themselves in the jungle.” Hunter gives you the short version, watching as you quirk an eyebrow.
Not wanting to be impolite, especially after brandishing a knife, you set the utensil down on the counter and introduce yourself.
“I’m Mox.” In return, the tallest of the three boys introduces himself before gesturing towards the other two boys. “This is Deke and Stak.”
“You’re pretty. Are all girls as pretty as you?” Deke pipes up, wide brown eyes focused on your face.
Amused by Deke’s straightforward question, you chuckle softly before replying. “Well, thank you, Deke. But trust me, plenty of girls out there are much prettier.” Your words earn a shy smile from the young boy.
“That’s a lie.” Hunter retorts, leaning against the nearest wall, arms folded across his chest.
Rolling your eyes, you offer him an amused smile. “You’re biased.” You fire back, holding his gaze for a moment. The simple action conveys a thousand words, and you can’t help but spot how much more tired he looks compared to the other week when you were dropped off. He’s been neglecting himself again.
“Well, if you’re done hitting on my wife, we can show you around.” Hunter breaks the moment, turning his focus to the three young boys.
“Wife? Aw, hell.” Deke mutters, earning laughter from Stak and Wrecker.
“Thought we weren’t allowed to get married?” Mox probes, narrowed eyes darting between you and Hunter.
“Technically, no,” Hunter answers him straight. “But things are a bit different here on Pabu. We’re treated like equals. We have the same rights as anyone else.” He clarifies, head tilting to look at you for a moment.
You smile fondly, remembering the quiet little ceremony you’d had right before everything had gone to hell. Echo, Wrecker, Tech, and Omega had been the only ones present for the union. Getting married had been an impromptu decision – during the war, neither of you had dared hope it would ever be possible - but you didn’t regret it for one second.
Sensing that you and Hunter might need some time, Wrecker offers the kids a grin. “C’mon, lemme show ya around.” He starts ushering them out of the kitchen. “We can get ya cleaned up, too.”
Pushing off the wall, Hunter goes to follow, but Wrecker holds a hand up. “I got this, Hunter. Don’t worry.” He offers his brother a smile before leading the boys away.
Gratitude curls through Hunter. He knows you and his brother have been going the extra mile for him lately, and he hates the burden that is placed on you both.
“Omega?” You ask quietly, stepping towards your husband, sliding into the warmth of his arms as he draws you into an embrace.
Hunter shakes his head and sighs. “Roland’s intel led us to the facility where we found the regs. Deke downloaded some intel from a panel – not much to go on, but we have a sector as a lead.”
Heaviness weaves through your body, and the hope that had been building dims into a small flicker. You’d keep hold of it, though. You weren’t about to give up. As you step back, you take Hunter’s hand, leading him out of the kitchen and towards the stairs. “They’ll be safe here. That’s something.” You insist, guiding Hunter upstairs and into your shared bedroom. He was in desperate need of a wash, some sleep, and a good meal in the morning.
Hunter makes a slight noise of agreement. It wasn’t the outcome he hoped for, but it still counted as a win. Inhaling deeply as you enter the bedroom, his shoulders sag as your comforting scent fills his nose.
Easing him down onto the bed, you kneel at his feet to remove his boots, wincing a little at the ache in your ribs as you set them aside. “I’ll start looking at the maps for that sector in the morning.” You vow. “Echo or Rex might be able to fill in some blanks for us too.”
Impatience rolls through Hunter. There was no time. It couldn’t be left until the morning. What if something happened and Omega was moved again? They wouldn’t have any leads anymore. “It can’t wait until then.” Hunter insists, attempting to stand up.
Unwilling to take any of his nonsense, you press a hand to his abdomen and shove him back down. “Yes, it can.” You insist, your tone catching Hunter by surprise. “I know Omega’s been gone a long time. I want our girl back as desperately as you. But what good are you exhausted?” You question, prying off the limited armour that covers his legs, stacking it nearly at the foot of the bed. “Finding her and Crosshair is of the utmost importance. But you cannot neglect yourself in the process.”
Hunter grumbles, but he knows you’re right. He sinks back into the mattress, allowing exhaustion to finally catch up. Your hands move with practised care, stripping away the layers of armour and padding. As you work, he watches you, a mixture of gratitude and worry in his eyes. You’ve always been the anchor, the one who keeps him grounded when everything else threatens to spiral out of control. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He admits softly, his voice heavy with emotion.
You pause, meeting his gaze with warmth and determination. “You won’t have to find out.” You assure him, leaning down to kiss his forehead gently. “We’ll find Omega and Crosshair. Together.” You vow. “Now, let’s get you a bath.” You rise to your feet, pointing at his undersuit. “Off.” You instruct, leaving him to follow your order as you move into the fresher. Plugging the tub, you turn on the taps. While a shower would be more efficient, it wouldn’t help him relax.
As the water fills the tub, you add a few drops of essential oil, knowing its calming properties will help ease Hunter’s tension. Returning to the bedroom, you find him obediently removing his undersuit, looking worn but determined. His commitment to the mission is unwavering, but you understand the toll it takes on him physically and emotionally.
Silently, you help him into the warm water, watching as the tension gradually melts from his muscles. Hunter leans back, closing his eyes, a rare moment of peace enveloping him. Sitting beside the tub, you run a wet cloth over his shoulders, gently washing away the grime, offering him a moment of respite from the chaos of the galaxy.
As you work, your mind drifts to Omega and Crosshair, wondering what trials they’re enduring and how you can help bring them home safely. The weight of responsibility sits heavy on your shoulders, but you refuse to let it crush you. You’ll do whatever it takes to reunite your family.
After a while, Hunter opens his eyes, meeting your gaze with a soft smile of gratitude. “Thank you.” He murmurs, his voice laced with exhaustion and affection.
“Anytime, my heart.” You whisper back, abandoning the washcloth to instead pry the filthy bandanna from around his head. With his hair free, your hand finds its way into it, fingernails scratching across his scalp.
A low moan slips from Hunter’s lips at the sensation, and he leans into your touch, eyes fluttering shut again. The warmth of the water soothes his tired muscles, and the gentle rhythm of your fingers through his hair lulls him into a state of relaxation he hasn’t felt in ages. As you continue to massage his scalp, he lets his mind empty. “You were right.” He admits quietly.
“Happens sometimes. Rare as it may be.” You drag your nails down the side of his head until your fingers skim the shell of his ear, changing gear to stroke down the plane of his cheekbone.
A small huff of amusement leaves him, and Hunter’s eyes open to meet your own. “Don’t undersell yourself, riduur.” 
Warmth sweeps through you at the title. It would still take some getting used to. “No promises.” You tease, earning a tired smile from him. “Also, does this mean we’re starting up an orphanage?” You tease.
Hunter chuckles softly, his fatigue momentarily forgotten as he enjoys your playful banter. “Maybe we should. Seems like we’ve already got a few residents.” He remarks.
“Well, if those kids are anything like you and Wrecker, they’ll fit right in.” You reply, fondness in your voice as you reach for a small bowl sitting on the tub’s edge. Dipping it into the water to fill it, you lift it as Hunter tilts his head back, letting you pour the warm water over his hair. You take your time washing away the grime until the water cools before helping Hunter out of the tub, handing him a fluffy towel to dry off.
“You staying for a nap?” Hunter asks, giving his wet hair a rub with the towel.
“Of course.” You reply with a smile, reaching for another towel to hand to him. “Just let me clean up here first.”
Hunter nods understandingly, wrapping the second towel around his waist before leaving the bathroom. You quickly drain the tub and wipe down the surfaces, ensuring everything is tidy before joining him in the bedroom.
When you enter the room, Hunter is slipping into a clean pair of sleep pants. He looks more refreshed, the exhaustion still evident in his eyes but less pronounced than before. You can’t help but admire the strength and resilience he carries, even in the face of adversity.
Settling into bed beside him, you pull the covers over yourselves, the warmth of the blankets cocooning you both in comfort. Hunter turns to face you, his gaze softening as he reaches out to brush a strand of hair from your face.
You smile, reaching out to intertwine your fingers with his. “Get some rest, love.” You whisper, leaning in to kiss his lips tenderly. “I’ll be here when you wake.”
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retrieve-the-kraken · 1 month
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So after taking some time to clear my head, and letting the wave of relief and closure wash over me, and feeling like someone literally unclogged my brain, I rewatched season 3 of Young Royals, but only finished just the night before I was going away for Easter weekend, so I didn’t have time to write anything.
But now I can finally say this: I liked it much better the second time.
And it wasn’t just the trepidation and anxiety that i had for finding out what happened in the end that kept me from completely enjoying it the first time. It was also that annoying week-long gap that we had to endure before watching the finale.
(I get that they did it for promotional purposes, and it was a lovely thing to be able to have that event for the final chapter, which obviously could only be one chapter, imagine having everyone there for the entire season, everyone watching for nearly six hours… no good.)
That gap, I feel, made it feel like we just landed randomly on an episode that was meant to tie up all the storylines. And of course it is, and of course it still feels that way in regards to some storylines, but wow, what a difference it makes to watch the whole thing as a whole, the way I’ve enjoyed the previous seasons.
I definitely could process it much better the second time around, watching calmly and carefully, and once I jumped straight from episode 5 into episode 6, it definitely felt more cohesive. It felt like it followed the same pattern as the previous seasons, the conflict at the end of episode 5 is very similar in every season, and it felt right.
And the final episode of each season seems to follow a very similar pattern too, except that it shifts a little each time as Wille gains autonomy. In Season 1, the climax was that Wille had to do what the crown said, on the crown’s terms (deny the video, keep August’s betrayal secret, lose Simon), because he didn’t know what else to do, he didn’t have a choice, sad ending. In season 2, he has to do what the crown says (do the speech, play the part of the Crown Prince), BUT he’s doing it on his own terms (telling the truth about the video, being with Simon, even if it means keeping August’s secret), he has somewhat of a choice, bittersweet ending. In season 3… well, it looks like he’s doing what the crown says still… and then he finally realizes that he does have a choice. Sad ending? Nej! He finally gets his happy ending. He has come to terms that the can have a choice.
The second time around, just when we thought we were getting yet another sad ending or bittersweet ending like the previous seasons, it shifted. Plot twist, he’s getting out of the car. Of course there is a lot up in the air (was your first thought also literally “but Wille, you left your bag in the car! You don’t have a toothbrush! You don’t have a phone charger! You don’t have clean underwear!” or are you normal? I am not normal, I have anxiety about things like that), there are many things that will still need to be resolved after the credits roll, but… it felt right.
And of course there are things that got tied up and still felt a bit quick, and things that felt annoyingly left up in the air, but that was precisely what happened each season, things that felt like maybe would get properly addressed the next season, but that’s not how life works. Not everything gets resolved. And it feels a little sadder or more bitter because we’re not getting another season.
But we are. It’s playing in our heads right now. People are writing fanfiction about it. And I can’t wait to absorb it all.
I’m definitely watching the whole season again, and doing a play-by-play analysis like I did for season 2, because I love hyperanalyzing every detail of this show.
Can I just preliminarily warn that I will be gushing about Edvin and Omar, and Nikita and Frida and Malte, so so much? Because the second time watching season 3, I was in awe, true awe, of how good they have all gotten. I mean, they’ve all been incredible from day one, but I feel like there were nuances to their characters this season that highlighted so much how incredible they all are. Particularly my babies, Edvin and Omar, deserve all the awards. Can’t wait to see everything they do.
I will miss them with all my soul. But I don’t have to let go of them yet.
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firstkanaphans · 3 months
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Hello Sarah sorry to bother you. I'm a new fan kinda but I'm done with watching all the firstkhao dramas (together and individual) but tbh I'm kinda lost on how I will get to know them better. I have no idea about their irl personalities that much. Maybe you can give a little introduction for me if it's not too much of a bother? Also like how they met and why are they doing so many projects together? And are they good friends irl too (my friend told me a lot of time pair actors don't really get along with each other which is why I got curious about their dynamic) Sorry if these questions are a bit dumb I'm altogether very new in bl fandoms so don't have a lot of ideas.
Oh, Anon. I don’t think you know what you’ve signed up for here. If you want a FK primer, I can give you a FK primer!
Both First and Khaotung started working for GMMTV back in 2018. I’m pretty sure talent agents simply slid into their DMs, so there was no formal audition process, but I could be wrong about that. They were both in university at the time. I’m not quite sure what they were doing that attracted the attention of the talent agents. I know First had been in at least one commercial prior, but I don’t believe Khaotung had done any acting. He had, however, had a picture go viral because he’s just so stinkin’ adorable. I think maybe this one? 
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Or it could have been one of these…
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Either way, they ended up in an acting workshop together right after they joined. Khaotung talks about how he didn’t like First at first because he was too friendly and talkative, but I think that must have only lasted for like a day because it was during this same workshop where he discovered that his heart beats to the sound of First’s name—“FirFirFir”—and yes, that is a real thing that he has admitted out loud on multiple occasions. They have been best friends ever since.
From there, the two of them began to act in individual projects—mostly BLs—and although I have no proof of this, I am entirely convinced that they were playing a long con to get themselves partnered together. They did way more fanservice before they were partnered than they do now. Feel free to watch this live from 2020 where they alternate between staring lovingly in each other's eyes and just outright flirting for an hour straight.
Look, they’re smart boys. They knew that their best path to success in this industry was to be in a fixed pair and they wanted that pair to be each other. How do I know? Because these two adorable idiots were showing up to events in matching outfits.
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This picture was taken in January 2021 when Tonhon Chonlatee was actively airing! There's a picture from this same event of them with Podd, who Khao was paired with, and Podd looks like the odd man out.
They were finally paired together for The Eclipse in 2022 and spent the entire press tour either talking about how excited they were to finally work together or crying about the possibility that they might never be able to work together again. I would highly recommend you watch The Eclipse special episode if you haven’t already. In it, First talks about how there was one scene where Khao wasn’t supposed to cry but he kept crying anyway because First was crying and he cared about First so much. 
And speaking of crying, if you want to watch a compilation of FK crying about how much they love each other (and other things!), you can find that here.
One thing I would recommend if you want to get to know FK better is to watch a bit of Safehouse Season 4. It’s unscripted, so you’ll get a sense of their personalities, but First was also in an arm cast at the time, so you’ll get to watch Khao dote on him for seven days straight.
Oh and you have to watch this! If you ever see people talking about the voices in First’s head, that's why.
Obviously, we can never truly know what goes on behind closed doors for any of these BL couples, but I feel pretty confident in saying that FirstKhao are genuine besties. They literally do everything together. You can find a collection of some of their lovestagram pics here although there are so many more now. It never stops.
Actual things they have said to each other un-prompted:
First to Khao: I want to build a house with the same fences as you.
Khao to First: As you grow up, you will meet many new friends. Leave them and stay with me.
I’m wracking my brain for anything else that feels important for a new fan to know and am coming up blank, but I’m sure I’ll probably think of something right after I post this. They’re both just super sweet individuals who have never been involved in any controversy and I think what people love most about them is just how much they care about each other. They’ve got that whole platonic soulmate thing going on and we're all super jealous.
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luvring · 1 year
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LEAVING LATE AT NIGHT
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bokuto + gn!reader | established relationship, fluff
personally i would Not try to go alone. but you know. gotta write what you gotta write for the fic prompt
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“kou?” you gently shake bokuto’s shoulder. your boyfriend had fallen asleep in the middle of your show and you didn't have the heart to wake him up; there was something comically adorable about him curled into you, tucked under a fuzzy blanket. but you were hungry, and you knew there was no more of your favourite snacks in the kitchen.
kotaro's eyes stay closed, but he hums at the sound of your voice. “hm?”
“’m gonna go get some food, okay?”
“okay,” he replies quietly. his arms unwrap from your waist and groggily, he reaches up for the side table where his wallet rests. “d’you have—do you wanna use my card?”
“no, it’s fine, it’ll just be some snacks," you promise. the both of you shift so you can get up, and you make sure to leave a quick kiss on his nose before moving to get ready.
“m’kay.” he exhales and moves to lay on his back, rubbing his eyes to wake up a little more. his voice is raspy when he speaks. “when did i fall asleep? what time is it?”
“you fell asleep an hour ago—i paused the episode by the way. it’s almost 10 i think?”
“oh, ’kay.” kotaro hums again. there’s a beat of silence as he listens to you put your shoes on and wonders how he fell asleep, but he shoots up a second later after finally processing your response. “wait, what?”
“i’ll be back soon, love you,” you call out, disregarding the sound of him pushing the blanket off of himself and it hitting the floor.
“what, no, what? baby, what—” he trips a little as he reaches for his phone on the coffee table in front of him. the brightness makes him squint, but he stutters again when he sees the 9:54 pm staring back at him.
“kou—”
“i’m coming with you, hold on. lemme put on my shoes, wait,” he cuts you off frantically. there’s a second where he notices he isn’t wearing socks, nor is there a pair nearby, and he reaches for his slip ons instead. 
“kou, you don’t have to, seriously,” you try not to laugh as he brushes his fingers through his messy hair.
“yeah i do,” he says while walking past you to reach his jacket. he only stops for a second so he can pull you in to plant a kiss on your forehead. bokuto looks at you, and he seems a little bit out of breath, but he still tells you matter-of-factually, “i’m your boyfriend.”
there’s little you can do other than watch him get ready with a small frown. you try to reassure him again, “it’s okay. you’re tired, kou. i’ll be fine–”
“no, i’m coming with you,” he says determined. “you don’t know what could happen this late. what if there’s someone dangerous, or like, a super big monster?”
“a what?” you snort. “i think the show got to you, baby. also what would you do against a monster?”
“well, maybe, but i’m just saying! you don’t know when you could be proof of the supernatural in a 7 eleven parking lot. and obviously i'd distract it until you got the car going and i'd jump in.”
the both of you look at each other, and you open and close your mouth trying to think of a response. because despite his words, and how his brows are furrowed and his mouth in a pout, bokuto's tone in genuinely concerned.
the store isn’t far, you’ve made the 5 minute trip yourself before. and you're sure if you wanted to stand your ground, promise to text or call, he'd (begrudgingly) stay behind. but it was bokuto. you never really rejected more time together, and you're not sure why you'd start now—even if it was only a 15 minute snack run.
so you admit defeat, exhale and smile softly at him. “okay, yeah, you’re right. maybe not the monster part, i hope, but, thank you.”
bokuto's expression quickly turns into a grin before he grabs the car keys. his other hand finds its way into yours, just as warm as usual. he pulls you along to unlock the front door, a bounce in his step as if he didn't just wake up. “did you wanna pass by a drive-thru? i’ll pay.”
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🏷 | @devilgirlcrybabiey @lordbugs @smiithys @xfangirl-trashx @passionateuchiha @scaramouchesfootstool @fifteenshadesofpinkk @lotus-sukimono @chloee0x0 @kenmaslov3r @bakugosgrenade @sakusasdirtyragdoll @dai-tsukki-desu @Thathoneybee3 @momoewn @aintgeluh @dazaisfavgf @simpforerenn @crystal-lilac @vhenis @omiigad @kur0-kawa @semispilledcoffee @idontlikeyourjob @awkwardaardvarkforever @rory-cakes @prblmtc @dimslover @kuroaka @sunaslay @h0n3ysgh0st @lackey-laufeyson @bontensbabygirl @dira333 @the-b-u-n-n-y @Kamukayakmonyet @danyisapingu @isentsworld @lilithlunas @anime-ships-gay @todorokiskitten
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mrs-monaghan · 5 months
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there’s so much misinfo going round atm, see lots of people saying that after jk enlists with jm and does the boot camp he can apply for some special ???something and will leave separately where he is stationed or that just because jk / jm are enlisting on same day, they only will do basic training together then go to separate places ? and that they only chose the enlisting together option because it meant they could make sure they were out in time for june ?
ik it���s a bit hard to follow maybe with different sources and not real confirmation but do you know if any of it is true? my understanding was that they did the “enlisting together” scheme thing, (ie. it’s a purposeful application, they knew they were choosing this way) which meant they’ll at least be in same living quarters etc the whole time until they’re out ?
sorry for long Q! it’s ok if you dk it was just confusing D; thank you!
Hi anon. 😳 I am terrible when it comes to the serious stuff and have the attention span of a toddler when such topics arise. My mind registers them as boring and so I don't retain the in4. But my friends delved deep into this so I will gather as much as I can and do my best to explain the sitch
Let me start by correcting the biggest misinformation of them all. Thanks to fucking Mina with her fake subs and reaching conclusions, the vermin are confusing "Special Task Force" with "Special Forces"
JK said he wanted to join special forces. Well and good
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But thats not what V is doing. V applied for Special Task Force which, while not easy (he said in the live its why he enlisted there, to challenge himself) its nothing compared to special forces. Special forces is HARD CORE. Its no joke. It's for those who actually want to go to war and proper fight for their country. Not for those fulfilling a mandatory duty... One they wouldn't do if they had the choice. Special forces, those people actually wanna be there. And if u know JK then u shouldn't be surprised that he would say something like this. Of course our dare devil bunny would enjoy joining something as risky as special forces.
But guess what? No one stopped him. He still could have gone there if he really wanted to. Just like in Winter package. No one told him to give up zip lining for beer tasting. He did that off his own volition since Jimin was going beer tasting. JK's happiness is where Jimin is. Period. (Suga's presence played a big part but we don't talk about Yoonmin)
(Edit: the whole thing takes almost 8 years to complete which again, is not something JK would actually do if he wanted to still stay a member of BTS. And of course satellite Jeon would again, never do it)
Jikook wanted to use the buddy system and they applied where Jin is on purpose because since the location is so risky, (front lines) not alot of people apply to serve there. So the chances of them being accepted were pretty high. I already talked a bit about that here.
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Coldest and most dangerous. But before we panic, Jikook love snow so... thats good. But also;
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2 things to note before we continue; 1) Tattoos are a none factor on why Jikook applied together or why JK couldn't be with V. They had 0 to do with that. And 2) All members and where they ended up it was their decision
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So, here is a Korean explaining
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They shall not be separated. They will train together and continue to serve together
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One body. Shiet.
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Nice. Even the breaks they will take together. Basically spend every minute together for those 18 months y'all.
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They had to pass 3 rounds. Applying wasn't all. They had rounds to pass before getting accepted. So as we can see this was a whole ass process. They really worked hard on this to make it happen.
Apparently there is a show you can watch that explains the buddy system. Its 8 episodes, its called real man
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The holding hands thing is legit 🤣🤣🤣
Jikook shouldn't have an issue then 🤭
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Anon, people are in denial and the other half are trying to explain this away. If Jikook only went in together just so they could come out at the same time then they could have done what Vmon did. Apply separately at the same time.
This is one tough pill to swallow for antis. It's like the biggest fuck u Jikook could have ever done but at the same time I really don't think they factored anyone else but themselves when they made this decision.
18 months is no small amount of time so let's call a spade a spade; Jikook couldn't be apart that long. Fax 💯 JK wanted to be there for Jimin, Jimin wanted to be there for JK, of course. Them in the same place looking out for each other is all I as a fan who loves them can ask for. But at the same time, they needed this.
Anon, they will be together 24/7 for the entire duration of their time there.
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Yes. Sleeping in the same quarters. It wouldn't make sense for companionship if they were separating the recruits who applied together. To be companions. Of each other.
The buddy system is there to help friends cope with this difficult mandatory thing that the government insists on doing to their young men. It's there to help them cope in any way possible. I imagine mostly mentally. So why would they train them together then separate them? ❓❓❓
It is said that you should make sure the person you apply with, is a person u get along with super well because for the next 18 months you will be together every moment of everyday. It's krazy to imagine that JK wouldn't rather do this with his actual boyfriend V, instead. Krazy. 🤯
Anygays, no need to worry my good people, Jimin and JK have got each other's back. All that's left is to wait for them and pray for them. May they always hold hands 🤭
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Tihihihihihihi
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bengiyo · 5 months
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BL 2023 Review
I wasn’t sure how I wanted to write about BL for this year. I was originally going to do a The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly framework for it, but that feels meaner than I actually am about it. Instead, I think I’ll just write out some sections and unpack some things I felt along the way.
I Watched Too Much Again
Last year I engaged with about 92 productions around the world. This year it was 99 (I tracked stuff I completed here). Sure I dropped 18 of them this year, but goddamn. The problem with watching as much as I did this year is that I worked full time this year and also maintained a separate hobby. I also continued my twice-weekly watch sessions with my friend Emily, so there are an additional 100-ish watch sessions in here of rewatching, plus a few other rewatches (Theory of Love and My Ride most notably).
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One of my struggles at this point is I’m far too familiar with the genre, and find myself feeling impatient and irritable with shows that aren’t to my taste the way I used to. Throughout the late summer and fall I found myself increasingly grumpier about the genre, and it didn’t get better until I had a holiday and basically slept a day to get some energy back. I also found myself growing apart from fans I’ve known and followed a long time. It’s been a difficult year for me as a long-time fan because my tastes, habits, and friendships in the genre have changed even if the amount I watch hasn’t really.
I Wrote a Lot This Year
I recently converted my watch tag away from my gaming internet persona to just my shortname, so all near-1000 of my Stray Thoughts posts can be found under #ben watches now. I’ve also been going back and adding #ben writes to some of the standalone pieces that I really liked. In reviewing them, the pieces I’m happiest about are my ode to Framboise from Kabe Koji Nekoyashiki-kun Desires to Be Recognized, my post begging everyone to watch La Pluie, my post about what it means to actually like queer men, my SBS ep 10 post that ended up being wrong, my post about the Lavender Scare and Be My Favorite, my Tokyo in April is… post about the breaking of the BL line,
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However, the two posts I am most proud of is my half-joking response about why I think tagging each other back and forth across Tumblr in our writing is so important. and The Knowing: Being Queer in BL because I had so much great conversations with folks as a result of both of these posts.
Looking back at my own blog, this is probably the most active I’ve been in my entire time on this website, so thank you to everyone who interacted with me this year, because it really is people talking to me that gets me most inspired to write things down. Big shout out to @lurkingshan who will bug me repeatedly until I blog something that I said in passing.
We Started a Podcast!
After hanging out with @shortpplfedup since Bad Buddy, she got inspired and really wanted to bring something different to the BL podcasting sphere. I had time, and liked talking with her enough, so we started @the-conversation-pod. Now we’re a full year into it and planning out future stuff. It’s been so much fun being able to get things off my soul and break poor NiNi in our recording sessions.
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From this year, I think my favorite episodes we did were The Moonlight Chicken Episode, the Eighth Sense episode, the ITSAY Anniversary Episodes,  The Wedding Plan episode, , and The Holiday Clip Show. Huge shout out to @ginnymoonbeam for anchoring the transcription process, and @lurkingshan for editing.
The VIIB Awards will begin airing soontm so look forward to that.
Favorite New Term: Business Gay Performance
Let’s be clear, Bump Up Business is not good. It is an obvious BL cash grab from OnlyOneOf that seeks to comment on the fake nature of BL while doing everything it can to trick the audience into believing that the BL pair is real.
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Before we got deeper into this year, I was a big fan of a certain pairing, and then their fans took it too far and it affected the way I engaged with their performances and their work. I like that we have a new term for “fanservice” that communicates that you understand that this is for work. (thanks to NiNi for this comparison) I can look at the latest behind the scenes video from Last Twilight and say that I think Sea really understands the work they’re doing, and he and Jimmy have a very relaxed and mature version of BGP without feeling like I’m feeding into shipping.
Do I think they’re dating? No. Do I like the way they fake it? Absolutely!
I can look at one of @respectthepetty posts about Yin and War having personalized, color-coded mics, and we can talk about the next level BGP between the two and both communicate that we know that this is a performance.
It actually makes the extra PR work fun for me again, because now I can just shout “BGP! BGP! BGP!” and it not feel like I’m giving myself brainrot.
Thai BL Needs to Finish Stronger Next Year
Let’s get into some of the show stuff. This year was defined for me by Thai BL starting strong with good premises and then squandering them by not focusing on the details that mattered or leaning into baseless melodrama. Time for some reads. Some of these shows were generally good, but they failed at these things:
609 Bedtime Story: The world building crumpled in the back half and both endings are flat.
A Boss and a Babe: Cher is a pro gamer who worked for a gaming company and there was no plot point about this at all, or collaboration between the two groups.
Bake Me Please: Why was a show about cake so lacking in flavor?
Be Mine SuperStar: You had a real opportunity to explore a fan and idol romance and had Punn show so little growth. I hope the footage of First’s range is helpful now that Ja is out of BL.
Be My Favorite: You redid that whole amusement park date and muddled so much of what the hell happened on that day.
Between Us: You had years to make this interesting. Why are there five pairs and why is the end of this a JC Penny catalog photoshoot?
Dangerous Romance: What the fuck happened to the Sailom we had in episode 1 and 2 before that gun incident?
Hidden Agenda: Tee, what the hell was this? Twelve weeks of this?
I Feel You Linger in the Air: You may be the most beautiful show, with some of the most impressive performances of the year, but you absolutely botched this ending. Finish the goddamn season next time.
Love in Translation: I love you, but that whole kidnapping plot was so stupid at the end.
Low Frequency: I like your OST. That's about it.
My Dear Gangster Oppa: No examination about how gaming friendships become close quickly because of the combination of anonymity and teamwork (shout out to @twig-tea for this excellent summation).
My School President: Saving your gay commentary for the final episode felt like a conservative choice. I want more from you next time.
Naughty Babe: You retconned your own characters to tell a worse story. Unforgiveable.
Never Let Me Go: You didn’t know if you wanted to be a high school BL or a mafia story. It was difficult to watch.
Only Friends: I cannot believe you did Boston like that at the end. Either give Force’s character a clear personality next time, or keep him enigmatic; half measures make him and Book look worse. Sand was absolutely embarrassing. Boeing was a waste. Ending on all of them paired like that felt so unearned.
Step By Step: You forgot to ground Jeng’s external dreams at the end, so the final two episodes are just frustrating.
I’m glad I got that off my chest. We can go into the next year now.
Korea Put in the Work This Year
I really like the efforts from the various Korean studios this year. I really hope we get a Strongberry joint next year, but I want to acknowledge that we had 18 Korean BL dramas I watched this year, and at least three of them I think are must watches: Our Dating Sim, Sing My Crush, and The Eighth Sense. Beyond that, I think Love Tractor, Unintentional Love Story, and A Breeze of Love are easy recommendations.
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It’s really impressive how the complaint for me this year with Korean BL is not about them using their time poorly. It’s more about normal drama concerns, where I think characterization is a little weak, or a theme doesn’t land squarely. This rapid iteration from the Korean studios is really impressive to watch, and I’m excited to see what some of the recognized players do next year.
Taiwan and The Philippines Have Been Quiet for Me
I wasn’t really able to connect with much from the Philippines this year except for The Day I Loved You. I never wrote about The Day I Loved You, but this beautiful and heart wrenching show is one of my favorites from this year. I wasn’t too keen on the Oxin Films offerings of this year, and I’m still chasing down the ones from The IdeaFirst Company.
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As for Taiwan, this new BL project from the end of the year just isn’t hitting. Kiseki: Dear to Me also ended up really hurting me with the way they used Wayne Song and Huang Chun Chih. I love that angry little man with the white hair, but I’m still salty about Wayne and the general mess of that show.
Japan was Busy This Year
I watched 16 new shows, a few older ones, and a few movies this year from Japan. We haven’t gotten this much from them ever. I continue to love the Drama Shower project from MBS, and my beloved What Did You Eat Yesterday? returned this year. We had pretty stellar outings with Our Dining Table, If It’s With You, and I Cannot Reach You.
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I think a third of the Japanese BL I’ve tracked on MDL actually released this year. That’s huge.
Still, I am going to side eye Minato’s Laundromat 2. You were the show that let me down the most this entire year. More than Only Friends, more than Step By Step, and even more than Kiseki. You absolutely blew it. You were telling a great story about a man with an acute case of internalized homophobia coming out of his shell and learning to love his younger partner and you blew it for stupid amnesia nonsense. I will never forgive you for this.
Where Were All the Uncles This Year?
Really, without Jim from Moonlight Chicken, and without the men from What Did You Eat Yesterday? we had an alarming dearth of older gay characters passing on knowledge and wisdom to the youngsters this year. What the hell happened?
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Rare Dynamics Won: Second Chance Romance and Friends to Lovers!
We had so much second chance romance this year. It’s really my favorite version of gay romance because gays don’t always have ideal settings when they’re young. We had Our Dating Sim, Individual Circumstances, Jun & Jun, The End of the World With You, Tokyo in April is…, Be My Favorite, Love Class Season 2, and A Breeze of Love. I am satisfied.
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Friends to Lovers is actually so rare in romance and we have so many to choose from this year! The best examples are I Cannot Reach You and Sing My Crush, but we also have one of the pairs in Love Class Season 2.
Gay Thoughts
I had a couple of ongoing thoughts this year about queerness in BL.
First, I want to return to my post about Sing My Crush and La Pluie, and how I assert that Men Need to Be Angry Sometimes. More than giving men grace to be righteously angry or upset about things, along with letting them express it in ugly ways, I really want to get into how we engage with these shows. I will stop engaging with moralistic reads on characters in 2024. I will no longer engage with asks, reblogs, or meta gripping the fandom where we're judging the moral fiber of the character.
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The question that really only matters for me at this point is: Is this act from the character justified from their characterization, the narrative, or genre conventions; and is it interesting? Whether or not the character is good or bad reeks of the lame arguments about good and bad representation, and I am not watching BL like I’m being graded in Sunday school.
The second thing I really want to acknowledge at the end of the year is that the gay sex is finally getting better again. I watched The Novelist this year, and we have taken so long to get back to the space that show took us on the portrayal of male-male intimacy. We are in the genre about people with dicks. It should feel like it. There should be a masculine component there that feels specific to queer intimacy.
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I will acknowledge 2 Cutie 2 Pie, A Boss and a Babe, Be Mine SuperStar, Bed Friend, Candy Color Paradox, For Him, I Cannot Reach You, Kiseki: Dear to Me, La Pluie, Love Class 2, Love in Translation, Love Mate, Middleman’s Love, Naughty Babe, Only Friends, The End of the World With You, Tokyo in April is…, and Wedding Plan for your contributions.
Final Thoughts
I like how broad the genre felt this year, and I enjoyed how much speculative fiction is entering into the conversation. I don’t know how I feel about there being five vampire stories in the works next year, but overall I’m glad that we’re getting more experimental concepts. I’m burnt out on the college engineering BL, and would like to see more shows about working adults.
Despite how grumpy I was for at least three months, I think this has genuinely been one of the best years we’ve ever had in the genre. I made a lot of new friends in BL this year, and I’m excited to see what comes next. Thank you all for spending some of your time with me this year and I’ll see you in the next one.
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