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kareofbears · 3 years

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persona 5 strikers thoughts and feelings

This is going to be a long post. Like, the type of post you’d only really have time to read when you’re trying to sleep but you’re not ready to be unconscious yet so you’re just looking for something to do to spend your time with minimal effort.

So in 2018, a masterpiece was born into the world: Into the Spider-verse was released and it was amazing—it’s honestly the best spiderman movie we have without a doubt, and it’ll be very far into the future before Spider-verse is beaten as the best spiderman movie. Them’s the facts. Then in 2019, Spider-man: Far From Home was dropped. It’s a great movie! Great characters, great continuation of who these characters are and works fantastic as a continuation of a story. It’s really hard trying to take the torch of a previous movie (or in Marvel’s case, juggling twenty something movies) and come up with a new movie that both works on its own, as well as being the next step in this series of films. Thus, with that idea in mind, I think it’s kind of unfair to judge into the spiderverse and far from home, because these are two movies with two completely different objectives in mind.

Okay, so this is still a persona 5 strikers post, I promise, but the idea is the same: Persona 5 could basically do whatever it wanted—new story, new characters, new everything, and it’s just plain old awesome. However, Persona 5 strikers did not have that sort of freedom. It was bound to the original game, and it had its own rules and stuff it had to keep intact, characters they had to work with, and on top of that, it had to justify its existence as a sequel (lets pretend money doesnt exist lmfao).

SO, the big question is: did it do that? Did it justify its existence?

And my answer: holy fuck did it ever do that

I came into this game knowing the extreme bare minimum. I knew there was someone named Sophia, and i knew there was roadtrip, and i knew there were Personas. That’s my knowledge of it before i played it on the Switch. I should also clarify like, early on, that i was not expecting anything from this game. At all. I was the world’s biggest cynic of this game—if you scroll down my p5s tag far enough, youll just see me complaining about a game that hasn’t even come out yet. I was fully expecting to have this be a Waifu show, and any male character that isn’t Akira to just be shoved aside like some kind of nerd in a high school hallway, and i have never been more pleased to be wrong. In fact, i actually owe it an apology, because of how fucking rude i was for no reason!!! Because this game deserves everything to be honest.

Persona 5 strikers is, frankly, insane. Insane in the sense that it got to pull shit off that just would never have existed in the original game, because the original game is scared. It had to be as impressive as possible and garner as much attention as possible. Strikers does not have that problem—every single person who bought that game does not need to be convinced that persona 5 is a good game. They already played it. That means Atlus can just fuck around and have a good time, and man did they have a good time. There’s still scenes that still shock me if i think about it too hard, because i’m used to atlus having to follow this sort of rule set when it comes to persona 5 (or any of the main games im assuming, but i havent played them.) And on top of that, there’s still shit that’s Atlus Trademarked Branded in a good way. The style of story of story telling, and revealing the mystery that is so integral to what p5 is, is still there.

So, to make this even a little bit comprehensible, i will make a list!

First of all, What is this game?

In short, this game is an OVA of an anime. It’s bonus side content that has one thing in mind: to showcase these lovable characters more by putting them in fun situations. That’s it, and it is just phenomenal. That was the main point of, i’d say, like forty hours of the game. It’s just fun times with fun characters.

But to get deeper of what i think is happening, or what they were thinking during the development, is that this is a second opportunity. Persona 5 (as we all know) had a lot of problems, and we were not quiet about those problems. We yelled it all out, made posts, made complaints on every social media platform ever. And Atlus heard all of them, and Strikers is a way to mitigate those mistakes. Aside from being a fun OVA, Strikers also works to be a deeper exploration of these characters—more specifically, the characters that did not receive much in the original game. Creating this sequel is having the ability to redo what they felt (or to be more specific, we felt) in the original game while adding new ones. I will get to that in a second.

The format of the game

Absolutely brilliant to throw them on a road trip. P5V already forced us to experience Shibuya for 200+ hours, and im so glad that they didn’t do that again. Going from town to town, making us experience these new places alongside our favorite characters is so good, and it just makes sense. It’s fun, it’s lighthearted, and it’s actually shockingly good. But one thing i do want to talk about early on is the way the story unfolds and the villains that they use, and what they do with it because it’s very interesting.

So as we explore japan and stuff, we encounter jails, and with those jails comes an antagonist. This antagonist works to be a parallel to one of our characters. That character will find it in their hearts to feel bad for the antagonist, because the antagonist could have been them had the original game not happen. At first I thought all of the thieves were gonna get an antagonist, and i was really hyped for the ryuji one. And then came to hour forty of the game where i realized “yeah that’s not gonna happen. There’s just not enough time.” And i was right, and the game ended. But i am not salty at all, honestly, because the people who got a direct antagonist were: Ann, Yusuke, and Haru. (we wont count zen and sophie).

Is there a trend??? Yes. these are all characters in the original game that have received the worst treatment by atlus. The three of them are basically cast aside the minute they finished their original arc, and its horrible! BUT that’s why this is the path that atlus chose for them—to give them more depth, and screentime, and a way to show their inner self. That isn’t to say that the ones who aren’t those three (makoto, futaba, mona, akira, ryuji) didn’t get anything. Futaba still has her thing at the end with ichinose, and she was very prevalent and animated during the rest of the game. Mona and Akira have to be a focal points, that’s just the nature of the game. The other two though, I will talk about in depth in a second.

Makoto

Y’all i poke fun at shumako fans sometimes cause its kind of easy and fun, but i honestly love makoto. In my very first playthrough of p5 (my first ever jrpg game, first persona game, i had no idea what i was doing), i had only maxed out two characters: ryuji and makoto. And i know she had a lot of screentime and love in the original game which is great, but i truly felt like she was dissed in this game. Her only roles were

A driver

Someone to tell them “we don’t have a choice. Let’s keep going and see where this takes us.” (seriously, if you replay this game, you will see how much she does this)

Idk, i just wish she had more to do, especially compared to how much love they gave the other characters.

But let’s talk about some of the new characters!

Zenkichi

Damn you atlus. Damn you and your insistence at bringing in cop characters. I was fully on board with hating zenkichi, i was fucking ready for it. I was convinced that there was nothing they could do convince to like zenkichi. I was immune to their copaganda.

And then i ended up loving him, which makes me sad a little bit. I didn’t realize how desperate i was to have an adult who has a persona. Someone who wants the world to change just as much as they do, while still having that aspect of them that makes them adult. Like??? As someone who is technically an adult, its a breath of fresh air. An adult. Who fights. For justice. Using a persona. And god i love akane so much, and her obsession with the thieves (that scene is probably in my top ten fave scenes of the game). Also what i loved about zenkichi is that he fucking hates the cops!! He hates the system of the cops!! And thats why i actually really started to love him!! Because i thought it was atlus saying that the systematic problem of the police cannot be solved by one person, and zenkichi threw away his badge. I actually cried at that part!!

But then he became a cop again, and i was just :/ but as a character, i really love him to bits and would love to do a study on him, or at least use him as an outside pov. But! i absolutely love his persona, since im a les miserables fan hehe

Sophia

she’s probably my favorite new aspect of the game. I was ready to not like her—again, i just suck like that, lmfao—and when i saw her, i was scared that she was just another waifu. I mean, she was very cute after all. But then as the game went on, i thought she was a little too cute. And even further into the game, i finally slapped myself in the face and realized oh my god shes not a waifu. Shes a sister.

That blew my mind, im ngl to you. A female character that isn’t supposed to be romanced? By jove, what a miracle!

And she…is an amazing character. Im sorry, i just love her so much. I love her so much that she probably ranks as my fifth or sixth favorite character which is surprising even to me. Everything about her is delightful and invigorating. She’s funny??? Her comedic timing is amazing, and she has such chemistry with the rest of the team. She’s actually useful to the plot, and while her character design is a little too on the nose for me in terms of cuteness (i mean, good god she’s wearing oversized sweater to show how cute and tiny she is, and her hair has literal hearts in it), she is absolutely lovable.

But what i actually really wanna gush about for a second is sophia at the last stage of the game. You get the idea, i dont really like to get excited over things, so at this point i figured that there was nothing this game could do to shock me.

And then sophia had a persona awakening.

Like. holy fuck did i yell. I didnt realize what was happening until the music had already kicked in. and its just so fucking smart!!! Sophia??? The ai?? With no heart?? gOT A PERSONA???? AWAKENING??? BECAUSE SHE LEARNED WHAT THE HEART IS AND THE PASSION THAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO GET A PERSONA??? I started crying honestly, because it was just so smart. And looking back on it now, its obvious!! Of course it would lead to this, it only made sense that the culmination of her character arc leads to her getting a persona, nothing else would have been as good. Also, her voice actor is just amazing?? When she was talking to ichinose at the end, i actually got incredibly emotional because of the line reads. Its just so spot on and it really captures the essence of sophia.

Muah. five stars Atlus. You got me.

Ryuji <3!!!!

Oh man. Oh boy. Okay. so where do i start.

Yall know i love him. Hes probably my favorite fictional male character of all time, and he is the one i was the absolute most cynical about in this game. I was expecting literally nothing. Nothing. Like. nothing. I thought he was just gonna keep being used as a joke, or a gag, and he’s gonna be super horny all the time for the other girls and it was gonna make me mad and there was gonna be some insane homophobic/queerphobic jokes in every other scene and i know i was being unfair, but i cant help it.

And then i played the first two hours of the game, and i cried the entire time. Because ryuji has never been better than he is in this game. Its crazy.

The ryuji in persona 5 strikers is who ryuji should have been/how he should have been treated this entire time. From the actual funny jokes (for example, the gold bar joke + his reaction to it in the beginning of the game), defending his female friends instead of being the one people need to defend from (natsume arc), and the fact that he was the one to be there with morgana and akira in the very beginning of the game. Its such a small thing that they didnt even need to do, but it was such an integral part of the original game for me, that i just was convinced that nothing like this was going to happen. But then it happened. Its just small stuff like that that could have been overlooked but it wasn’t because this game? Persona 5 strikers? Fucking loves ryuji.

The actual respect they gave this boy is insane and i wasn't ready for it. Like, they gave the shujin trio lunch, they gave the little charm of the katana when they were in natsume’s jail, and, in my opinion this is the second-best thing that they could have given ryuji is sophia. Ryuji and sophia are the pinnacle of a brother & sister bonding relationship in the game that isn’t akira & futaba. And its really prevalent too?? Small stuff from the beginning of the game (pulling her out of a jail, calling her shorty), but then you have the iconic “shut the fuck up” scene, and that scene was so well characterized and written and voice acted, that somehow him saying “fuck” was the least exciting part of that scene to me. Ryuji is an older brother to her, like its undoubtable, and its only further cemented at the end of the game where Ryuji helps out ichinose because he knows how much sophia cares about her. This game. Love ryuji. And i love. This game.

You know what else i love? Akiryu.

Guys. i was fully prepared to starve in terms of akiryu. But theres just. So much of it. I wont get too deep into it, because i think this aspect of the game for me still needs marinate a little bit. Like, what was that last shot when EMMA died and Ryuji walked to approach Akira so they could relish in their victory together?? And the smile from both of them??? What the fuck. That was amazing. Also Joker being saved by Ryuji when he was about to fall from the cliff to save sophia??? WHAT. The LEADER AND HIS RIGHT HAND MAN? WHAT. anyway. If theres anything i want to keep for myself in my own brain, its the akiryu aspect of this game, so i wont talk too much about that part of things (instead, itll probably manifest in fic lmfaooo).

Sure, there’s tidbits of stuff i dont like that they gave ryuji: sexualizing ann in that one cut scene and making him touch the jails even though it hurts, and i recognize those and frown at them, but for the most part, i am blown away with how they treated him.

Basically, Ryuji has never been better. From the opening of the game with him being the first text message and the one to sling his arm around akira, to the very last cut scene where it was ryuji wordlessly leaving because he’s so confident that they would never be separated for long, this game adores Ryuji and i am so so happy to say that.

The Royal aspect of things

Yeah, i had to talk about this, but itll be a short thing i just wanted to point out. Because the last part of this game...is persona 5 royal. Which is curious. Like taking reality and giving that power to someone else so you dont have to experience suffering anymore? And even like, the final section just looked a lot like the top half of maruki’s palace?? And whats even crazier is that we had a boss fight with sophia, just like how we had a boss fight with sumire? Royal and Strikers have like, the same thesis statement. It’s kind of uncanny.It’s interesting, it’s like atlus came up with these two ideas, and then just decided they liked both of them so much that they just did it twice. I don’t mind though—actually, in terms of how the last Palace/Jails go, i probably like them both about equally.

Though i did love the final battle in this one more than i did in royal. Splitting into teams?? Thats cool as fuck, and really innovative and i didnt see it coming. It also kicked my ass. A lot.

Now for the last stretch: the small stuff!

The music — bomb as fuck. In my heart, Daredevil is ranked the same as Rivers. Axe to grind is also amazing, but Daredevil owns me

Akechi — i really debated whether or not to talk about him, but i figured a bullet point should be enough. Im really shocked that he wasnt in this at all. Like not even a name drop. If this is an OVA, and the point of the game is to please the fans, and akechi is arguably the fan favorite character, i was really ready for something. But there was nothing, except for the pancake hallway if that even counts as a reference. Thats it. Thats all i wanted to say about him.

The humour — FUCKING HILARIOUS im convinced that in my fifty hour playtime, five of that is dedicated to me laughing and unable to continue the game

Akira — so much personality! His lines of dialogue are crazy sometimes (like. Whats up with him saying Ryuji has ‘nice abs’ when they were in bath? Im crazy and even i dont know what the fuck that could mean)

Battle system — oh my god i almost forgot to talk about this. I love it! I kind of miss the turn based aspect just because i found it very comforting for some reason, but this hack and slash style of gameplay is so invigorating because i do feel like it justifies shit like the baton pass and huge attacks. This battle system fully encompases how the Phantom Thieves are supposed to fight, you know what i mean?

Anyway, thats my thoughts on strikers. Loved it. Amazing. 9.3/10, wouldve been higher but Konoe’s Jail almost bored me to death. Also im a monster and i didnt do any requests that isn’t a fun one, teehee. As if i play persona 5 for the persona aspect of things.

#cant believe im done #but you know what?#i was actually at peace when i finished it #so i consider that a good healty thing #p5s #alex plays p5s #mine #p5 #my moon and stars #the leader and his right hand man

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shortace · 3 years

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The Adventures of Gloop and Angry Hamster in the Dimension of Fire Unfamiliar Environment with a Kid Who’s Going To Get Fired

Gloop was pretty smart for a goldfish. It came, he thought, of spending too much time in close proximity to Myles Fowl. That alone, however, would have done nothing; it took the intermediary efforts of the trans-species polyglot Beckett for anything Myles said to make any sense to Gloop.

Angry Hamster wasn’t very smart, even for a sculpture made of shredded IQ tests held together with saliva. He was too busy being angry because he couldn’t figure out which number came next after 37, 34, 31, 28. Gloop could have told him the answer was 25, of course, and Myles would have informed him that IQ tests really only measure how good you are at standardised tests but his was 170 thank you very much. But Angry Hamster never thought to ask. He wasn’t that smart.

Dolphin was a dolphin, and exactly as smart as a dolphin.

The sun shone, and a light breeze played with the tips of the waves. No record survives concerning the nature of the game, but possibly Tic-Tac-Toe. What we do know is that the ocean won. The ocean always does.

But Dolphin, leaping and frolicking, cared nothing for the breeze, or the sunshine, or the Tic-Tac-Toe. Her only concern was to have no concerns. And she was remarkably good at it.

The low hum of a far-off boat reached Dolphin's ears, but she paid it no mind. It wasn't her concern.

Inside Villa Eco, young Myles Fowl was trying to comfort his twin brother Beckett. He wasn’t very good at it, as he often failed to grasp that emotions do not respond to logic.

'She's a wild animal, Beck,' he said again. 'She does wild things.'

'But she said she'd be there!' Beckett insisted. 'Dolphins don't break promises, brother.'

'Your sample size is one,' Myles pointed out, Beckett having only ever met one dolphin, and Myles remained unconvinced that actual communication had taken place, making ‘met’ seem the wrong word for the encounter. 'That is insufficient data to draw a conclusion regarding the reliability of the species.'

'I just know she's in trouble.'

Myles thought that 'just knowing' was poor research methodology, but he just sighed. 'We'll wait for her again tomorrow. Now come on, it's lunch time, and we need energy for our growing brains.'

Gloop, in his bowl, let out a nervous 'Gloop.' He hadn't understood all of the twins' conversation, but he could tell that Beckett was worried and it had something to do with his new dolphin friend. Even though dolphins were mammals, not fish, somewhere deep inside all aquatic creatures was a sympathy with all the rest, and like Beckett, he hoped that Dolphin was okay.

Dolphin was not okay.

Off the coast of Dalkey Island, a fishing boat loitered. The pilot was sleeping off a bout of food poisoning - which, frankly, served him right for many of his illegal and immoral practices. On deck was a single underpaid, unqualified, and underage employee. Not for him a certificate in aquaculture, nor one in first-aid aboard ship. Moby Dick, though, he had read several times: quite an achievement for any adult, let alone a fifteen year old. The boy did his best to make up for his shortcomings with pure enthusiasm, and had, a few moments earlier, cast out a line with a complete lack of precision and the wrong bait. This wouldn’t normally be much of a problem, as tuna fish aren’t known for being overly fussy, but in this case Dolphin happened to be having a wonderful time just off the stern of the boat, and she wasn’t fussy either.

The bait was disappointing, tasting stale and dull, and it had something hard and sharp inside it. It hurt Dolphin’s mouth. This would not stand. What sort of ocean gods would provide food like this? Dolphin raised her voice in complaint.

Sound travels faster in water than it does through the air, so it wasn’t long before Dolphin’s podmates heard her whistles and clicks. Roughly translated, she had said: ‘This fish is bad and it hurts my mouth; send me the manager.’ Her podmates laughed and mocked her, a series of clicks that traveled all the way to the shores of Dalkey Island, where Beckett stood listening.

Gloop’s laps of the fishbowl slowed slightly as he devoted more energy to his brain. Dolphin was in trouble, and NANNI wouldn’t let Myles and Beckett put to sea. Gloop was going to have to solve this problem on his own. It was a bit harder than figuring out what came next after 37, 34, 31, 28, but not for nothing was he the smartest goldfish in Ireland and perhaps the world. He would have to enlist some help.

‘Brother mine, what are you putting in the fish tank?’ Myles asked wearily. He had written multiple treatises on the biology and psychology of twins, and perhaps his most important conclusion was that love and exasperation could, and generally did, co-exist. His second most important conclusion was that doubling the calorific intake of one twin could not sustain the other; Beckett had simply bulked up while Myles’ stomach rumbled miserably. He would not be repeating that experiment.

‘It’s a scaled-down version of your water filtration system, attached to a swimming suit,’ Beckett said proudly. ‘Gloop is going to sea, and he needs fresh water.’

‘There is only one Gloop, and two filtration systems,’ Myles pointed out.

Beckett held aloft the second unit. ‘This one’s for Angry Hamster. Look, NANNI fixed it to make air for him!’

‘Beck, Angry Hamster can’t swim.’

‘Gloop will help him. He told me.’

‘Is this about your dolphin friend?’

‘Yes, Myles; Gloop and Angry Hamster are going to rescue her!’ Beckett beamed. ‘NANNI has no joooo-ris-tic-shun over them!’

Myles had been playing vocabulary lists to his brother while he slept, hoping he might learn subliminally; he was pleased that it seemed to be working, but less pleased about this plan. ‘That is true,’ he acknowledged, ‘but Angry Hamster is made of paper and saliva. He will disintegrate in water.’

Beckett demonstrated the watertight suit he had had NANNI design for him. It was monogrammed with a cursive AH on each side. ‘Angry Hamster wants to go.’

Myles sighed. ‘Very well, brother. How are they going to get into the ocean?’

‘I will flush them down the toilet,’ Beckett proclaimed.

Beck!’

‘Kidding, brother!’ Beckett laughed at his brother’s shocked expression. ‘I will carry them to the beach and throw them in. Gently.’ Despite his boisterous nature, Beckett had a deep empathy and was perfectly capable of being gentle if circumstances required. Myles imagined that introducing two very different non-sea creatures equipped with untested suits into a marine environment counted as circumstances that required it.

Beckett was as good as his word, and Gloop and Angry Hamster safely - if nervously - entered the waves from the Fowl’s private beach. To Myles, Beckett seemed to be making a series of very strange noises, but Gloop and Angry Hamster each heard ‘Fishing boat, southeast! Good luck!’

Being small creatures in a big and strange new world, Gloop and Angry Hamster did not swim particularly fast. They did their small best, though, with Gloop encouraging his papery friend. Angry Hamster got along in a sort of wriggly doggy-paddle, and NANNI’s suits withstood the challenge. Both animals were kept safe and breathing in their own special ways.

In a matter of hours they had caught up with the fishing boat. Angry Hamster was exhausted, and if the boat’s pilot had not been unwell, he would never have made it. If our heroes understood the concept of food poisoning, they would be very glad for it. The boat remained idle. Angry Hamster was able to cling to the side with one claw, even though it was hard to grip through the material of his suit, and hold up Gloop with another, allowing them both to rest.

As they rested, Gloop and Angry Hamster heard a voice above them. Angry Hamster could make nothing of it, but Gloop caught the drift of it. If either of them had a full comprehension of English, what they heard would have been something like this: ‘I don’t think this is a tuna fish. It doesn’t look tuna-y. I think it’s a dolphin. I’m going to be fired. I’m in so much trouble. What do I do? What would Ishmael do?’ all the accompaniment of pacing footsteps and heavy breathing.

Gloop caught ‘dolphin’ several times, as well as ‘fired’. He knew two meanings of the word fire: one was hot and burny, and the other was fast and deadly. Neither sounded good for Dolphin. He tried to convey his concern to Angry Hamster, but the fragmented analogy question on the hamster’s back was itchy and he couldn’t scratch it through NANNI’s suit. This, combined with hunger and exhaustion, was making him very angry. He let out a wild screech and clawed his way frantically up the side of the boat and onto the deck.

The pacing, muttering boy stopped pacing and muttering at the sight of a wet-suited paper-mache hamster climbing on board. He began to wonder if food poisoning was contagious, and if hallucinations were a common symptom. Angry Hamster took advantage of the hesitation to launch himself at the boy’s face, screeching. What he was trying to say was ‘For the love of all the gods, scratch my back!’ But what the boy heard was tantamount to ‘I’m going to claw your face off!’

Gloop knew he had to act fast. High jump is not commonly practiced among small domestic fish, but with determination and a rudimentary understanding of geometry, much can be accomplished even by the smallest of animals. He swam away from the boat to give himself a run-up - or rather, a swim-up - and followed Angry Hamster’s lead in launching himself on deck.

The poor boy fainted on the spot.

To one side of the deck lay Dolphin, tangled in fishing lines and nets, flopping weakly. Dolphins can survive several hours out of the water, if it isn’t too hot or dry, and Gloop was relieved to see that, although she was clearly tired and uncomfortable, Dolphin was unhurt and should make a full recovery. But first they had to get her back into the water, which meant getting her out of those nets.

Gloop knew who had the perfect teeth to gnaw through fishing lines. What he didn’t know was how to convey that instruction to Angry Hamster, who was currently scuttling around the deck looking for something he could scratch his back against - and whose teeth were still enclosed in NANNI’s watertight suit. Angry Hamster finally found a scratching post in the form of a tackle box. It had a sharp corner which dug in through the suit and hit the sweet spot perfectly. Angry Hamster was, briefly, less angry as he scratched. But his suit was meant to withstand water pressure, not tackle boxes. It ripped open, and Angry Hamster wriggled his way out of it. On some level he understood that this was undesirable, and he turned to look apologetically at Gloop.

But Gloop was overjoyed now that Angry Hamster’s teeth were free. He mimed chewing, gnawing, and pointed with a fin at the nets surrounding Dolphin. Chewing comes naturally to hamsters, so Angry Hamster understood immediately, and abandoned his tackle box. It was the work of moments to chew through the lines holding Dolphin on deck. Before she let herself slide back into the ocean, Dolphin took a moment to slap the recovering fisher boy with a fin.

‘Hey!’ he protested weakly, but she was already gone.

‘There, brother.’ Myles and Beckett stood on the beach on Dalkey Island, looking out to the southeast. Myles had just spotted Dolphin scything through the waves towards them. ‘I told you she would be okay.’

‘And I told you Gloop and Angry Hamster would save her.’ Beckett handed the binoculars to his twin, to let him see the small goldfish swimming furiously beside the dolphin, and the slightly mushy hamster riding on her back.

THE END (probably)

#artemis fowl #the fowl twins #gloop and angry hamster #fanfic #writing #beckett fowl #myles fowl

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arcticdementor · 3 years

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I have to begin this column by admitting that “Biden” (note: when in quotation marks, I refer to the “collective Biden”, not the clearly senile man) surprised me: it appears that my personal rule-of-thumb about US Presidents (each one is even worse than his predecessor) might not necessarily apply in “Biden’s” case. That is not to say that “Biden” won’t end up proving my rule of thumb as still applicable, just that what I am seeing right now is not what I feared or expected.

…

I think that both of these grossly oversimplify a probably much more complex and nuanced reality. In other words, “Biden” surprised many, if not most, Russians. That is very interesting by itself (neither Bush, nor Obama nor Trump ever surprised the Russians – who knew the score about all of them – in any meaningful way).

My strictly personal guess is that there is some very serious infighting currently taking place inside the US ruling class. Furthermore, that serious infighting is not about core principles or even strategy – it is a dispute over tactics only.

We have to keep in mind an old truism about outcomes: John F. Kennedy once said that “victory has a hundred fathers, but defeat is an orphan” and he was right. When any group seizes power and effectively controls its interests, all is well, and everybody is busy consuming the proverbial milk and honey. But when this group suffers a series of humiliating defeats, a typical cascade of events begins:

Finger pointing: everybody blames everybody else (but never himself/herself)

Hindsight wisdom: “if I had been in charge, this would not have happened!”

Infighting over quickly shrinking spoils of war

A collapse of the centralized center of authority/decision-making centers

Generation of subgroups, fighting each other over their sub-interests

In other words, following many years of extremely weak presidential administrations (since Clinton, imho), it is hardly a surprise that infighting would take place (in both parties, by the way). In fact, an apparently chaotic set of uncoordinated, or even contradictory, policies is what one should expect. And that is exactly what we have been observing since 1993 and this dynamic has been getting worse and worse with each passing year).

…

That being said, there are some observations which might be helpful when trying to at least (indirectly) identify who are the main groups fighting each other.

The hardcore, really nutty, russophobes are still here, especially in the US media which seems to be serving not so much “Biden” as much as some “crazies in the basement” kind of cabal. Next to the legacy ziomedia, there is an increasing number of US/NATO/UK military officials who are foaming at the mouth with threats, warnings, complaints and insults, all against Putin and Russia. This is important because:

The “Zone A” media has comprehensively and very effectively concealed the very real risks of war with Russia, China and Iran. And if this was mentioned, the presstitutes always stressed that the US has the “best military in the history of the galaxy” and that Uncle Sam will “kickass” anybody he chooses to. If the people of the USA were informed of the truth of the matter, they would freak out and demand that this path to war be immediately abandoned and replaced with a meaningful dialog.

US/NATO/UK authorities have talked themselves into a corner where they have only two outcomes left: they can do what the US always does, that is to “declare victory and leave”, or they can force Russia to protect her borders on land, air and sea and, thereby, face a major military humiliation delivered by Russia.

Truth be told, during the recent naval exercises UK and US officials made a lot of threats and promises to ignore Russian warnings, but in the end, they quietly packed and left. Smart choice, but it must have been painfully humiliating for them, which is very dangerous by itself.

…

There will be many more NATO exercises in the Black Sea in the future. Ditto for USN operations off the Chinese, Iranian or DPRK coasts. This (always explosive) combo of ignorance, arrogance and incompetence could result in a major war.

LAnother option is the terminally delusional UK government (supported by those Brits who still have phantom pains about their lost empire and, of course, by the largely irrelevant 3B+PU gang) might do something really stupid (say, like this) and trigger a war with the DPRK, Russia, China or Iran and then the US would have to move to defend/save a British Navy which is mostly a joke (at least by Russian or Chinese standards). The main problem here being that the USN is also in a terrible shape and cannot compete against Russian and Chinese standoff weapons (I mean that literally, there are currently no defenses against maneuvering hypersonic missiles! The only exception would be the Russian S-500). The latter two nations, by the way, have joined into an informal and unofficial military alliance for many years already; check out this article and video or this one for a recent update).

But opposite, de-escalatory developments are also taking place. First and foremost, “Biden” seemed to have “farmed out” the “Ukrainian dossier” to the Germans and washed Uncle Shmuel’s hands from it. If so, that was a very slick and smart move (which is something we have not witnessed from any administration in decades!). I highly recommend this translation of a most interesting article by arguably the best Ukraine specialist out there, Rostislav Ishchenko.

Ishchenko goes into a lot of interesting details and explains what “Biden” apparently just did. Frankly, the Germans richly deserve this full-spectrum mess and they will be dealing with the consequences of this disaster for a long time, possibly decades. In fact, the Germans are stuck: they want to be the Big European Leader? Let them. After all, the EU politicians, led by Germany, did all they could to create what is now often called “country 404” – a black hole in the heart of the European continent. Germany is the biggest economic power of the EU? Good, then let the Germans (and the rest of the EU) pay for the eventual reconstruction of the Ukraine (or of the successor-states resulting from the breakup of the country)! Russia simply cannot foot that bill, China most definitely won’t (especially after being cheated several times by the Ukies) and the USA has absolutely no reasons whatsoever to do so. I would even argue that chaos (social, economic, political, cultural. etc.) in Europe is probably seen by the US ruling class as highly desirable since it 1) weakens the EU as a competitor 2) justifies, however hypocritically and mistakenly, a “strong US presence” in Europe and 3) gives NATO a reason (however mistaken, misguided and even immoral) to exist

The US is protected from the fallout (immigrants, violence, extremism, etc.) of the Ukrainian disaster by distance, the Atlantic, a much stronger military (at least compared to anybody else in NATO). The US can print money in any way it wants and has no interests whatsoever in the (dying) Ukraine. If Ishchenko is right, and I agree with him, then there is somebody (possibly a group of somebodies) who is a lot smarter than anybody in the Trump Admin and who figured out that the Nazi-occuppied Ukraine should be an German/EU problem, not one for the US.

There is, of course, also the pessimistic analysis: the US is on the retreat everywhere, but only for the following reasons:

Regroup, reorganize, buy time to develop some kind of coherent strategy

Focus on each adversary separately and prioritize (divide et impera at least!)

Re-analyze, re-plan, re-design, re-develop, re-train, re-equip and re-test pretty much everything in the US armed forces (which have not been shaped by any rational force planning in decades)

Those who believe the strategic retreat theory (I am not personally discounting this version, but I do not see enough evidence – yet – to endorse it either) typically add that “the US only left Afghanistan to hand it over to the Taliban/al-Qaeda and unleash them against “soft underbelly of Russia”. Now, that is utter nonsense, if only because Russia does not have a common border with Afghanistan.

…

Coming back to “Biden’s” great retreat: if “Biden” is smart enough to hang the Ukraine on Germany, “he” is probably too smart to predicate the US foreign policy towards Russia predicated around the “soft underbelly” thingie. As for all the “fire and brimstone” threats of war against Russia, they are not impressing anybody as the Russians, the Chinese and the Iranians know that a confident and powerful country does not need to threaten anybody, if only because the actual capabilities of these country are a very telling “threat” by themselves. But when a former superpower is weak, confused and frightened, it will make many roaring statements about how it can defeat the entire planet if needed (after all, the US military is “the best military in the history of the galaxy”! If you doubt that, just listen to Toby Keith!). In other words, while in the West threats are an instrument of foreign policy, in Russia, and in the rest of Asia, they are inevitably seen as a sign of weakness, doubts and even fear.

Then there seems to be a long list of weapons systems, procurement plans and “defense” monies which have been pulled back, including the (truly awful) LCS and F-35. While it is true that the US is gradually phasing out fantastically expensive weapons systems and platforms which were also more or less useless, this show the ability to at least admit that all that talk about super-dooper US superweapons was just that, talk, and that in reality the US MIC is incapable of producing the kind of superb high quality systems which it used to produce in large quantities in the past (Arleigh Burke, F-15, Jumbo 747, the Willys Jeep, F-16, A-10, Los Angeles SSN, KH satellites, etc.). This is why the F-15X is designed to “augment” the F-35 feet (by itself a very smart move!).

Such an admission, even if indirect and only logically implied, might show a level of maturity, or courage, by “Biden” which his predecessors did not have.

Could it be that the folks at the Pentagon, who do know the reality of the situation (see here for a very good Moon of Alabama article about this), figured out that Clinton, Bush, Obama and Trump vastly over extended the Empire and now they need to regroup and “re-everything” to achieve a more sustainable “defense” posture?

Could it be that “Biden” will deliver what Trump promised, i.e. to end the useless (and unwinnable!) wars, stop caring too much about the agonizing EU, silently accept that Russia has no intentions (and no need!) whatsoever to attack anyone and focus on the biggest non-military threat out there: China. Maybe.

As far as I know, many (all?) simulations – by RAND and the US military – and command staff exercises have shown that the US would lose badly to both Russia or China. Could it be that “Biden” wants to put Russia and China on the backburner and “deal” with Iran first? The latest news on the US/Israel vs Iran front is not good, to say the least.

…

So what are we left with?

Frankly, I am not sure.

I think that there is very strong, even if only indirect, evidence which there is some very serious in-fighting taking place in the “Biden” administration and there is also strong, but also indirect, evidence that the military posture of the United States is undergoing what might end up being a major overhaul of the US armed forces.

If true, and that is a big “if”, this is neither good news nor bad news.

But this might be big news.

Why?

Because, objectively, the current US retreat on most fronts might be the “soft landing” (transition from Empire to “normal” country) many Trump voters were hoping for. Or it might not. If it is not, this might be a chaos-induced retreat, indicating that the US state is crumbling and has to urgently “simplify” things to try to survive, thereby generating a lot of factional infighting (at least one Russian observer specialized in “US studies”, Dmitrii Drobnitskii, believes to be the case: see the original article here, and its machine translation here). Finally, the state of decay of the US state might already be so advanced that we can consider it as profoundly dysfunctional and basically collapsing/collapsed. The first option (soft landing) is unlikely, yet highly desirable. The second option (chaos-induced retreat) is more likely, but much less desirable as it is only a single step back to then make several steps forward again. The last option (profoundly dysfunctional and basically collapsing/collapsed) is, alas, the most likely, and it is also, by far, the most perilous one.

For one thing, options #2 and #3 will make US actions very unpredictable and, therefore, potentially extremely dangerous. Unpredictable chaos can also quickly morph into a major war, or even several major ones, so the potential danger here is very real (even if totally unreported in Zone A). This, in turn, means that Russia, China, Iran, the DPRK, Venezuela or Cuba all have to keep their guard up and be ready for anything, even the unthinkable (which is often what total chaos generates).

Right now, the fact that the US has initiated a “great retreat” is undeniable. But the true reasons behind it, and its implications, remain quite obscure, at least to me.

I will conclude by asking you, the readers, for your opinion: do you think that the US is currently in a “contraction phase”? If yes, do you believe that this is a short-term only phenomenon, or will this retreat continue and, if yes, how far?

#unz review #the saker

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whattimeisitintokyo · 3 years

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Ch 43 The Department of Family Reunions and Ch 44: Frangipani

It has come to my attention that I never uploaded the previous chapter onto Tumblr. Oopsy doopsy!

So here’s both the old and the new chapter in one package, all yours for free. Enjoy!

“C’mon, I’ve been waiting for over forty minutes now!”

“You said we were next in line!”

“It’s already eleven o’clock! We don’t have all night you know!”

Old Chicharron tried to ignore all of the complaints and shouts of the other restless spirits hanging around him as he marched towards his office with several heavy, ancient books under his arms. But then more came, some louder and angrier than others, and Chich’s very low tolerance for foolishness gave way. Twirling around he let out a sharp piercing whistle that made everyone in the whole department cringe and fall silent.

“All right, listen up!” Chich barked out once he had their attention. “Unless any of you still has some flesh clinging to your bones, you’ve been moved back on the list of my priorities right now! Héctor Rivera is priority number one, comprende?!”

“Ah, the Riveras have always been your favorites, cabrón!” one stupidly brave skeleton shouted back.

“Pah! Shows what you know! I don’t like anybody!” he snarled before turning his attention to the Rivera family, Leti in particular, with a warm smile. “Leticia, how nice to see you chiquita. Come on in, I have all I need to settle this mess. How’s your mamá?”

Having not let go of Leti’s hand since he had been reunited with her, Héctor was pulled from his seat as the rest of the family walked into the small man’s office. Marigold Station was huge, with several other departments and hundreds of skeletons walking and running about. But the Department of Family Reunions was where the most harried of skeletons seemed to be, trying to get to different ofrendas and fighting with weary customer service assistants. They too stared in awe at a living man walking amongst them and able to see and interact with them. But whatever wonder they had turned to ire when they realized that the living man and his family had just cut in line in front of them.

Héctor also noted that there were even more skull and bone motifs in the architecture, the wallpaper, even the floor tiles.

He was picking up a not-so-subtle theme here…

“Héctor Rivera, step up here by the desk.” Chich said grumpily as heaved the heavy books on top of the desk with a loud grunt and then took a seat. “Sorry there’s only one chair in here and it’s mine, so you’ll have to stand.”

“Oh, uh, that’s alright.”

“Can I get you anything? Coffee, water?”

“No gracias.”

“You’re cursed.”

“What?!” Héctor gasped, hearing his in-laws do the same behind and feeling Leti hugging him in fear. The blunt and tactless way he received his news was like another slap to his sore face. “How? How am I cursed?!”

“Well that’s easy.” Chich said as he pulled out a thick folder and started flipping through the pages. “Dia de Muertos is a night to give to the dead. You stole from the dead.”

“I didn’t steal anything!” Héctor said righteously.

“Oh really? Because the evidence is staring me right in the face.” He pointed down at the guitar still in Héctor’s grip. When Héctor looked down himself he seemed to wilt a little at that in embarrassment.

“Oh… well, I… Oh!” Héctor held up the guitar. “No no, you don’t understand! I wasn’t stealing the guitar. I was preventing my son from stealing the guitar! Very different, you see? Heh heh… heh.”

Looking around at everyone in order to get some sort of understanding, he was just met with unimpressed stares. Gaspar snorted out a laugh. “Wow, Miguel’s a thief? What kind of parenting do you do?”

“I am a good parent! That’s not the point!” Héctor whined pitifully. “Look, I didn’t mean to steal it, alright? I had no idea this would happen. So can you please undo this?”

Chich gave a fake, simpering smile and laugh. “Oho, is that so? Alright, let me fix that for you with my magical powers, amigo. Abracadabra, oh look you’re still cursed. Lo siento.”

“This makes no sense!” Héctor cried out. “How does picking up a guitar get me cursed to the afterlife? Many people have picked it up and taken it away for refurbishing over the years. Is it just because it was on Dia de Muertos?”

“No, not exactly.” Chich explained. “Sí, it being Dia de Muertos does play a big part in this but simply stealing from a grave or an ofrenda won’t get you cursed by itself. Otherwise the whole department would be swarmed with little living babies who’ve swiped a candy or a galleta for themselves. No, the real reason you are cursed is because that guitar is cursed.”

Everyone turned to look at the guitar with newfound apprehension, with both Gaspar and Mirasol stepping back slightly in case the curse would spread to them. Leti nodded slowly with dawning comprehension, letting out a soft ‘ohhh’ in understanding. Héctor was honestly… not surprised. He knew that music was a curse to him and his family, bringing more misery than good and hurting him so much. The fact that it was Ernesto’s guitar, whose memory brought a good portion of that pain, seemed very fitting.

“All right then,” he said. “So… what do I do to fix it?”

Pulling out one of the thick books on his desk, Chich absently shrugged. “I dunno.”

“You don’t know?!” Héctor stared at him wide-eyed and sputtered, then immediately leaned over the desk in agitation. “What do you mean you don’t know?! Isn’t this your job to know or whatever job skeletons have?!”

“I don’t know yet, just give me a minute!” Chich barked out and shoved Héctor’s face back with one hand. He flipped through the pages quickly, scanning them over. “Living people don’t come and go through the Land of the Dead very often, you know. Luckily for you you’re not the first one, I just gotta find his file.”

“You mean this has happened before, Senor Chicharron?” Leti asked.

With a grunt and a nod, Chich didn’t look up from his book. “Si, some guy got sick and was stuck in Limbo. And then… someone in the department messed up his Limbo retrieval and he ended up getting lost in the Alebrije Forest. We got him out and back to the Land of the Living, but he ended up making artwork out of the damn things now the whole world knows about alebrijes and I… someone got reprimanded for the whole thing and had their pay docked.”

“Oh sí, Alebrije Forest.” Gaspar laughed nervously. “The only place here besides the Land of the Dead where alebrijes reside in their thick forest, with lush greenery and fertile soil that no skeleton is allowed to go to. Yep, no one goes there. Not a single soul.”

Chich shook his head in disgust. “Dios mio, everybody knows about your black-market vegetables in the forest, Rivera, and nobody cares! Case in point, I’d like some mangos next time you get some. Aha, here it is. The Linares case.” Finding his spot on the page he quickly skimmed it over and gave out another grunt. “Well this should be easy. The only way to break a curse is to get a blessing from someone.”

“A blessing?” Héctor asked, finally getting the answers he needed he smiled and nodded with excitement. “A blessing. Okay, who do I get a blessing from? A priest, a nun? I’ll take one from anyone at this point.”

“It’s de la Cruz’s guitar, so you need de la Cruz’s blessing.”

“I’ll take one from anyone else at this point.”

Everyone groaned in exasperation as soon as he said it, even Dante made a snorting huff at him. Leti looked up at him with disappointment. “Oh Papa. Why do you hate Tio Nesto so much?”

“I-uh… I don’t hate him exactly.” Héctor said. “It’s just, umm… I have a lot of mixed emotions about him, and we didn’t exactly part on good terms- Look, Senor Chicharron, is it? You seem like a nice guy, down to Earth, the kind of guy you could borrow stuff from. Is there anything else I could do to go back?”

“It’s de la Cruz or nothing, Rivera.” Chich said gruffly.

Standing up straight, Héctor smoothed out his jacket and started to give off an air of high importance. Something that did not suit him at all and he hated to do, but the situation called for it. “Uh Senor, I don’t know if you know me, but despite my appearance I am an extremely wealthy man. So here’s what I’ll do for you.”

Reaching into his pocket he pulled out his leather encased checkbook and a pen. Scratching out the details onto the check, he pointedly ignored the way Gaspar slapped his own forehead loudly and how Leti looked up at him with disappointment in her large eyes.

“I’ll start you out with ten thousand pesos, sí? And if that’s not enough then you can add as many zeroes to the end as you want. The sky’s the limit amigo, now what do you say?”

Ripping the check out, he leaned onto the desk and held it out in front of Chich’s glowering mug and put on his best winning, charming smile that ended up looking more sleazy than anything else. It was clear to everyone in the room at that moment that while Héctor was the true musician of the two, Ernesto was the true businessman.

“Anyone ever tell you that you get stupid when you’re desperate, Rivera?” Chich asked, causing Héctor to wilt. “Look, you need de la Cruz’s blessing and that’s that. But you got to get it by sunrise and it’s already past eleven.”

“Sunrise? What will happen at sunrise?”

“Well, if you get your hand off of your attempted bribery of a public official you’ll see for yourself.”

Putting the check down Héctor saw what it had been hiding and what he hadn’t registered before. The rest of his hand was normal, but his index finger was… white. Dumbly he tried to wipe it off on his pants, but the whiteness remained. It was white and… sectioned. Also his fingernail was gone. And his… skin was gone. He clenched the finger and it responded normally, but the sickening creaking sound it made caused the blood to drain from his face.

It was bone. His finger was turning into bone.

He was turning into bones. Into a skeleton.

Bones. Skeleton. Death. Dying. Bones.

…..

“Wake up Papa!”

All of a sudden that horrible smell had assaulted his senses again and Héctor coughed and hacked at the burning sensation coating his nasal cavity. Mirasol was kneeling before him and pulling away the smelling salts from his face with Leti hovering over him worriedly. Mirasol sighed with relief. “It’s a good thing Barto gave us this. Turns out we needed it after all.”

Groaning, Héctor reached a hand to cover his forehead only to jerk it away when once again he saw the whiteness of bone on his finger. He just laid back down, wincing a little as it felt like he was laying on something sharp and lumpy like a pile of broken boards. “What happened?”

“You fainted Papa!” Leti said. “You’re eyes just rolled back into your head and you fell backwards like a tree!”

“It was the shock of it all.” Mirasol said, pocketing the smelling salts. “Honestly, I’m surprised you lasted this long without fainting.”

Héctor huffed out a short laugh. “I had good cause- Ow!” Shifting in discomfort, whatever he was laying was now poking at him in the back painfully. “Why didn’t anyone catch me? And what am I laying on?”

“Me.”

The pained, grunted out voice in his ear caused Héctor to scramble up and off his irritated father-in-law in surprise. With a grimace he took him Gaspar’s scattered form and reached out his hands to help, only drawing back when he realized he didn’t know where to start. Apparently Gaspar had tried to catch him when he had fallen, but his height and weight had been to much for the shorter skeleton and pieces of him were now strewn about the office floor. His skull lay there on his own, glowering unamused as his wife and granddaughter tried to stifle their giggling and Héctor lay hovering but not helping. “You are heavier than you look, yerno.”

Héctor chuckled nervously and gripped his forearm. “Yeah, I’m uh… dense.”

“Dense in the head too.” Gaspar grumbled as once again the bones began to wobble on the floor and magically grouped themselves together. Once he was in one piece he helped himself and Héctor off the floor, silencing his girls with a glare that spoke that this little incident was not to leave the room. Ever.

“Now that you’re done with your little nap, I have something for you.” Chich said.

Everyone turned to see Chich had gone to the other side of the room and had retrieved a large black guitar case from the corner. Pulling out the plain brown guitar and shaking out of few bits of knick knacks and trash he handed the empty case to Héctor. “I don’t trust you to keep that thing safe, especially if you keep keelin’ over like that. This way you can protect it since it’s probably your ticket out of here.”

With a nod and mumbled thanks Héctor placed the golden guitar into the case and made a move to close it but paused. “Why do you say that? I thought you said I needed a blessing from Ernesto?”

“Sí, I did.” Chich nodded. “But that guitar is probably just as important,. Because in the nine years that Ernesto de la Cruz has been dead, and the thousands of offerings he’s brought back from the Land of the Living since then… Not once has he ever brought back that guitar with him.”

Crinkling his brow in confusion, Héctor glanced at the guitar, then to his daughter for confirmation. With Leti’s solemn nod Héctor shook his head. “I don’t understand. He always performed with this guitar, even in his movies. He loved it. Why wouldn’t he have it with him in death?”

Chich shrugged emphatically and glared. “What are you askin’ me for, you need to ask him! He’s the one who can answer that. Now take that guitar to him, get your blessing, and get out of here. I’m too busy to deal with you anymore.”

Pouting Héctor closed up the case and slung it on his back. “Okay, okay. Sheesh!”

“Ay, puta de madre, one more thing: the blessing.” Chich said before they left. “de la Cruz needs to get a cempazuchitl petal and present it to you, call your name and say, ‘I give you my blessing to go home’ and then you take the petal. Poof, your gone.”

“…That’s it? I’m gone, just like that?”

“Just like that.” Chich said. “Now you can get out of my sight.”

Leti watched as he father and grandparents head out the door, pausing to talk about something that she couldn’t hear, and turned towards Chich with a smile. “You know this will be my third time helping Papa on Dia de Muertos. I don’t know what he’d do without me.”

“You should think about getting a little punch-out card.” Chich said with a smile. “Save your Papa five times and you get a free helado, sí?”

Leti laughed out loud at that, a sweet high-pitched giggle, and old Chicharon found himself smiling even more. The little girl always made him feel better, especially on a night like tonight. “You go on ahead with your Papa. If you need anything else don’t hesitate to come back. I’ll be here all night.”

With a laugh, Leti shook her head. “Well, not all night.” At Chich’s questioning brow raise, Leti rolled her eyes. “You have to go visit your family later. You always take a later shift, right? So the newer deceased can go first.”

“… Of course.” Chich nodded and rasped out a hoarse chuckle. “Of course, you know me too well niña. Well after that you can come see me, claro? Tell me all about how you saved your Papa yet again.”

“Okay! Buenos noches, Señor Chicharron!” Leti said as she left. “Enjoy your visit!”

Watching Leti close the door, Chich didn’t immediately start to get ready for the next skeleton to come in. He just leaned back tiredly in his chair with a gravelly sigh. Bringing his fingers up to his face he glowered hard and he could see the slight gray tinge to the bones. A grayness that had been getting steadily worse over the years. He could even make out the beginnings of a small crack along the index knuckle.

Then he looked down as his lunch kit, knowing that that for the first time in decades it held no offerings, no pan dulce, not even a plain piece of fruit. It was a new feeling for him: Not receiving any offerings, not having his picture put up, that angry buzzer that he had heard from a distance before now reverberating loudly and sharply in his memory. Yes, a new feeling that he didn’t like one bit.

Finally he looked around his office. How many days had he cursed that he had ended up servicing the ungrateful souls of the afterlife with little to no thanks or perks? Now he was looking around and taking note of every nook and cranny of the small room, inhaling the scents of old paper and black ink. And it made him even angrier that, eventually, he would be asked to leave this wretched job and never see this stupid room again. And that he’d miss it.

“I’ll be here all night.” He mumbled again to no one.

But for how long?

Walking outside the Marigold Station and back into the Land of the Dead, Héctor was once again blown away by the majestic sights of gravity-defying skyscrapers and strange animals, that he now knew were the aforementioned alebrijes, flying and buzzing about. There were even more crowds of skeletons dancing in the streets and selling their wares in vendor booths, laughing and yelling and singing. It was so different and yet so familiar it made Héctor’s head spin, and he couldn’t help but smile at everything around him in spite of his dire circumstances.

But nearby skeletons were staring at him and pointing again, and Héctor tried in vain to cover his face with the short collar of his jacket.

“We really need to do something about this.” Gaspar said as he glared at the crowds. “You’ve got to get to de la Cruz pronto and being stopped by these gawkers isn’t helping any.”

“Maybe we could go home and get your hat and scarf to wrap around him?” Mirasol suggested. “Or we could buy some paint and make his face like a calavera, so he’d blend in?”

Gaspar snorted. “There’s no way paint would be able to hide that protruding nose.”

“Okay…” Héctor faintly growled.

“We won’t have to worry about that!” Leti piped up, and Héctor once again found himself melting and smiling at Leti. It felt just so good to hear her voice again that it was almost painful, and he hung onto her every word. “If anyone tries to stop or stall us, Frangipani will get them off of our backs. Speaking of which, she will also be our transportation for the night. Just stay here Papá, I’ll go get her!”

Walking off into the town square with Dante panting happily behind her, Leti cupped her hands and called out to this Frangipani whoever, letting out a few shrill whistles despite not having any lips. Héctor’s chest clenched painfully as he remembered the day when he had tried to teach his children how to do just that, just the tightening of teeth over lips with no puckering. Leti had been the only one to do it, at the ripe age of four years old. He had been so proud.

“A word Héctor,” Mirasol said softly, breaking him out of his memories. “Before you two go.”

Héctor had to force himself to look away from his daughter, wincing and smiling sheepishly once his attention was turned to his in-laws. “Sorry.”

“No no, it’s all right.” Mirasol smiled. “We… know what it’s like to lose a child to death. Especially when they are so very young.”

Héctor’s eyes widened and his gasped softly. “You mean… Before Imelda, you lost-?”

“No.” she reassured him. “No.”

“My wife and I may have been the ones who died, yerno.” Gaspar said, for the first time sounding somber since talking to his son-in-law. “But we still lost all three of our children that day. Only it was worse since we couldn’t see them or protect them when they so dearly needed it most.”

“We wished so badly to be able to raise our children, and in the end we got that opportunity with our granddaughter. But… I never wanted it to be because you and Imelda and the family suffered such a painful loss. And for that I am truly sorry Héctor.”

Feeling that he may start crying again Héctor pressed his lips closed and looked towards his daughter again. Leti now looked impatient as she tapped her foot, an adorable pout crossing her bony lips. Apparently whomever this Frangipani was wasn’t coming when they were being called. It made him smile to see Leti so full of life again despite being dead, especially after seeing her as a hollow husk of her former self the last few days of her being alive.

“Well,” Héctor managed to finally say with a little hoarseness. “she seems to be well adjusted and cared for. Thank you for taking such good care of her. Imelda was right, you two are great parents.”

“So are you Héctor. You are a wonderful father.” Mirasol said, her expression sad again. “You just need to remember how to be one.”

His smile falling from his face and his eyes narrowing, Héctor suddenly didn’t like the turn in conversation. “What do you mean?”

“You know what we mean Héctor.” Gaspar said, and despite being physically twice the skeletal man’s age Héctor suddenly felt like a punk kid in front of his father-in-law by the tone in his voice. “We were there the whole night watching you blow it with your family. Making your grown children cry, making Imelda cry, and Miguel! The poor boy will be scarred forever from tonight and that is all on you! Frankly, I should have slapped you again for what you’ve done!”

Héctor’s face grew hot and the guilt that he had successfully pressed down from before came right back up, and he as he tried to defend his actions he sounded more miserable than truly defiant. “No, they… They kept secrets from me… betrayed me… I-.”

“They kept secrets from you because they love you.” Mirasol softly said, then sighed. “We may have only seen you one day out of the year during these last few decades, but we both know that this isn’t who you are, Héctor. You are sweet, full of creativity, loyal and very goofy. The same things I see in my husband, Imelda sees in you.”

Gaspar harrumphed at that. “Don’t compare me to him…”

“This downward spiral with the whole family started with Leti’s death, sí?” Mirasol asked. At Héctor’s small nod she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “Then go. Be with her for tonight at least. It’s high time you finally heal. And with Ernesto too. Remember: we were there that night as well, mijo.”

That night.

Héctor couldn’t help but shiver when he thought about that night. The secrets that Ernesto had been hiding from him, the fight, being knocked out and locked up by his supposed best friend. All of the lies and betrayals that all ended in a bloody smear in a crater. The fact that they were there that night, that they bore witness to that terrible accident, made all the what ifs that he had suppressed for years come back again. If only he had been more attentive to Ernesto’s well being instead of his own, if only he had successfully kept him from going on that stage. If only he had managed to reach him before he hit that final note and the bell cracked loose.

He would still be alive.

Seeing the distress her son-in-law was feeling, Mirasol drew him into a hug and rubbed his back when he stiffened up. It should have felt weird: being hugged by a skeleton. But she was somehow warm and comforting, and Héctor found himself returning the hug and feeling a little better. A hand clapped on his shoulder made him look up, and Gaspar smiled at him little. His own little way of offering comfort too. Héctor was grateful.

“Oh there you are, you silly thing you!” Leti cheerfully said, causing the three adults to break apart before it got awkward. She came up to Héctor with her hands cupped together and smiled brightly at him. “Finally! Sorry for the delay Papá, but our ride is here now. Say hello to Frangipani, my alebrije!”

Opening up her clasped hands and presenting them to him, Héctor was shocked to see an elephant in his daughter’s hands. A pink elephant, to be precise, with butterfly wings for ears that fluttered lazily and green polka dots dotting her body. The elephant was also no bigger than a mouse. Héctor’s first thought was that this was the most adorable little animal he had ever seen in his life, and he couldn’t resist reaching a finger out to pet the little thing. He smiled when the elephant made a tiny peep! and wrapped it’s trunk around his finger. It was amazing and fitting that his daughter would have such a cute ally-buh-buh or whatever it was called.

But then he recalled what Leti had just said to him about it. And it made no sense. “Our… ride?”

“Yep!”

“… Mija, I know I’m a thin guy but if I ride that thing it’ll be an elephant tortilla soon enough.”

Leti tittered a laugh and lifted a finger to lightly rub the small creature’s knobby head, causing it to toot with contentment. “No no! Frangipani’s special, all alebrijes are. They can take many forms, do all sorts of cool things that boggle the mind, and not everyone gets them. Only those who need help when they need it, a spirit guide to guide them on their journey through the afterlife. Frangipani has helped me on many an occasion, you know… Wanna see her special gift?”

At Héctor’s nod, Leti whispered into the butterfly ear and suddenly they both began to flap rapidly. The tiny pink elephant left Leti’s hands and began to float hazily in the air, a high-pitched buzzing noise emitting from the ears. Héctor laughed as it buzzed a circle around his head, shaking his head in amazement. So cute. “Aww, she can fly… Still too small to ride though.”

“That’s only one of her abilities. Here’s the other!” Leti let Frangipani rest back onto her hand, and then began to wind up. “Frangipani: Grande Grande!”

And with a mighty swing Leti flung the alebrije high enough into the air until she was only a tiny pink dot in the sky. And then, within the blink of an eye, a giant five ton elephant came crashing down onto the pavement with a ground-shaking thud. Skeletons shouted in alarm and ducked for cover when the monstrous behemoth was suddenly taking up space in the plaza, and Héctor found himself stumbling back into his in-laws once again making a sound befitting a small girl.

Gaspar shoved him away and helped him balance back to standing position, and Héctor gawked at what had happened to the adorable little animal that seconds ago could have fit in his palm. It was still pink, at least, and the ears were still that of a butterfly’s. But the colors were harsher and glowed all over, the green polka dots had transformed into tiger stripes, the tusks were solid gold and as sharp as daggers at the ends, and the trunk looked like it could squeeze the life out of him faster than a python.

Not so cute anymore.

“Ta-daaah!” Leti grandly proclaimed as she went up beside her alebrije without fear, some skeletons applauding the spectacle while others put themselves back together. “Papá, this is the real Frangipani!. She can be as small or as big as she wants! A size-changer!”

Héctor placed a hand on his chest to calm the wild beating and sucked in a breath. “I… see…”

“And guess what?” Leti smiled. “Frangipani is the same elephant that Tio Nesto brought to Matty and I’s birthday party all those years ago! Remember?!”

As the words registered in his brain Héctor’s shock and amazement instantly turned to agitation and annoyance. “…You mean the same elephant that destroyed your gourmet birthday cake that I spent a small fortune on? And then sprayed me with icing and snot? That… elephant?...”

Frangipani, for all of her grandeur, seemed to deflate slightly at that. A lame wheeze of a trumpet let loose from her, and her trunk timidly poked at the ground in shame. Leti winced and brought a hand up to soothe her chastised spirit guide. “Uy… and I thought it was elephants that never forgot…”

Héctor sighed and walked up towards Frangipani, reasoning it would be silly to be wary about a seemingly wild animal when his eight-year-old daughter was hugging it. The long trunk unraveled and started poking around Héctor’s chest, the dainty upper lip of it managing to catch a sensitive spot and causing him to laugh. Gently pushing the trunk aside, Héctor cleared his throat and straightened his face. “Ahem… So this is our ride?”

“Sí.” Leti said from above, and Héctor was surprised to see that she was already on top and positioned behind Frangipani’s massive head. “Normally I’d have her grab you by your shirt and haul you up here, but you still have all your skin and organs so that would be very painful for you. So I’ll kneel her, you step up onto her leg, grab her ear and hoist yourself up. It’ll be easy!”

It wasn’t easy.

At fifty years old Héctor was not as limber as he used to be, and in the end he had to be pushed up by Gaspar and pulled by Leti to finally secure himself behind her. It was even more embarrassing when the normally clumsy Dante was able to hop up behind him with grace and dignity, panting and smiling with pride. Frangipani was also very hard with thick skin, and it took a few moments to position himself so that he was straddling her back with the least amount of discomfort.

“Oof… Oh!... Ay… Ugh, you’d think an animal this fat would be softer. No no no, wait! I’m sorry, I’m sor-!” But it was too late, for Frangipani’s trunk came up and blew a blast of hot air directly into Héctor’s face with a giant trumpet. It took a few seconds for his ears to stop ringing and his face to stop stinging before he realized that everyone in the plaza was laughing at him. Smoothing his hair back into place he pouted until Leti spoke again.

“Okay then, let’s take to the air!”

Wait what? The air?! The butterfly ears weren’t just for show?!

“Wait wait wait wait!” Héctor cried out before Frangipani could even move her ears an inch to begin flight. “I’m fine with riding an elephant, but flying is absolutely out of the question!”

“Aw, what?” Leti complained and Dante huffed in annoyance behind him.

“I agree with Héctor.” Gaspar said. “That alebrije is not the most graceful of fliers. I know from experience. You’ll be able to walk to Ernesto’s mansion in no time.”

“We’re not going to the mansion first.” Leti said, Héctor not seeing the conspiratorial smile on her face. “We’re going to go to Shantytown. Tio Nesto always brings his portion of offerings there first before the party and concert. We’ll meet him there!”

“Mija...” Mirasol sighed. “Are you sure you just don’t want to wait at the mansion first?”

“No, I don’t.” Leti said seriously. The tone in her voice troubled Héctor a little bit, it was not like his daughter to disagree with an elder flat out. Before he could question it, however, Leti piped out again happily. “Trust me!”

Mirasol’s face gave off a series of wavering emotions, clearly hesitating over whether this was a god idea or not. Finally she sighed and nodded, giving Leti a small proud smile. “All right then.” Looking now at Héctor, she continued. “Héctor, this may be the last time we see you for hopefully a long while. Good luck, mijo.”

Gaspar gave a short wave, smiling a bit. “Adios, yerno.”

Héctor nodded and smiled. “Adios. And thank you for everything again!”

With a gentle nudge by the ear from Leti, Frangipani started to walk slowly in the opposite direction down the street. Héctor jolted a little at the sudden motion and made a grab for his daughter to keep her upright, but Leti just shook her head and laughed. Several skeletons made way for the large alebrije walking through the crowd, and Dante gave one last bark at Gaspar and Mirasol as a way of goodbye.

When they all turned around the corner and disappeared, Gaspar sighed. “Do you really think going to Shantytown is a good idea?”

“It might be.”

“You know why she’s really taking him there, don’t you?”

“Sí.” Mirasol nodded. “But it might help. Héctor needs to heal from his past wounds. And if there’s anyone here who can help him feel better, it’s Leti.”

-------------------------------------------

“Why the heck would you want Miguel to go to business school, Papá? Are you loco?”

Héctor couldn’t help but be little offended at that. Seems like everyone, even those in the afterlife, thought that maybe some of his parenting ideas weren’t so great after all. Even Imelda had balked at the idea of business school at first before he had managed to talk her into it the night before. Though from the reactions he got from everyone else, the way they had ganged up on him about Miguel pursuing music, maybe… No.

“I don’t understand why it’s such a bad idea!” Héctor said as all three of then swayed back in forth as Frangipani weaved through the streets of the dead. “He’ll have a secure future, be able to provide for himself and his family. And besides Matty is a businessman and he loves it!”

Leti chuckled sarcastically and turned around to face Héctor. “Papá, I love my brothers with all of my heart, but Matty is a boring stick in the mud who collects coins and stamps that are, in his words, neato. And Miguel’s… not the brightest bulb in the city if, you catch my drift.”

“Oh, come on. Miguel is very smart.”

Leti rolled her eyes. “Just tonight I saw he and Victoria get into a heated debate on whether vitamins existed or not. And before you ask, he was against them being real.”

“Oh… I’m beginning to think I don’t know my own children.” Héctor said sadly.

Leti leaned back against him and hummed. “You used to… but think about it. Music was so engrained into our family for years. It was the backbone to our successes, helped us out through tough times. Even though I could only see him once a year I could tell Miguel was going to grow up just like you, a musician through and through. Then, all of a sudden, it was taken from him at such a young age. I guess that was when the secret-keeping started. You forbid something he loved and made him happy. Made others happy too.”

“I was trying to protect him from what happened to Ernesto!”

“Papá…”

“I was! You were there that night, right? He died on stage singing that dreadful song-”

Remember me…

Though I have to say goodbye

Remember me!

Don’t let it make you-

Héctor gasped as they passed by one of the apartment complexes on the street, one skeleton on a balcony languidly humming along to a radio blasting that song at full volume. Even worse other skeletons had heard it too and started to sing along with it as well. Once again Héctor’s insides clenched up until it was hard to breathe, his face grew hot, and his heart started pumping a mile a minute.

Shoving the heels of his palms hard into his ears and squeezing his eyes, he was able to feel that Frangipani had started to pick up speed. Leti must have urged her further to get away from the song as quickly as possible. Once they were at a safe distance Héctor felt Dante’s wet tongue lick his hands, letting him know it was safe to let his hands down again. He did but kept his eyes shut as he tried to will his body to calm down. Again Leti leaned into his chest and Héctor wrapped his arms around his daughter searching for comfort.

He was so ashamed.

“You really hate that song, don’t you Papá?”

His voiced trembling more than he wished it too, Héctor rasped out. “I… can’t stand it…”

“That’s very sad.” Leti said. “You used to love that song, especially since you wrote it out of love for Coco.”

“I can’t feel the love anymore.” Héctor whispered. “Only pain… and death.”

“… It’s because of me too, right?”

Héctor didn’t say anything. Couldn’t confirm it, or rather didn’t want to. Because it was true. Two lives taken from him because of that song. Héctor just hugged her tighter, Dante whining behind him and placing his chin on Héctor’s shoulder. They stayed that way for a few moments, just Héctor holding her, before Leti spoke again.

“Well, I rather like that song.”

The bluntness coming from his daughter was so surprising that Héctor couldn’t help but huff out a small laugh, but he just kept holding her with his eyes closed.

“I remember my last day alive. I was terrified, in pain, could barely breathe. But you were all there for me, and I was so glad Tio Nesto made it to say goodbye. I couldn’t speak properly, but I wanted you to sing to me Papá. I wanted you to sing that song. And you did. You all did. It was beautiful, and it was the last thing I remembered being alive. It helped me pass peacefully.”

“I know you feel like the song took us away from you, but I like to think that it released us from our pain. You were right, I was there that night. I saw Tio Nesto was sick at heart, but he still sang that song one more time. But we’re not gone Papá, not as long as you remember us the way we were. Because now we’re not sick and dying anymore. Now we are free to FLY!”

At that word Frangipani’s wing ears spread wide open at rapid speed, and before Héctor had a chance to open his eyes the alebrije was air-born with one mighty flap and a whoosh of air.

Héctor once again made a sound that he was not proud of and held on tighter to Leti, trying in the back of his mind to convince himself that he was protecting her and not clinging on for dear life. There were many things he wanted to shout out, such as ‘stop!’, ‘I said no flying!’ and ‘wasn’t there a movie about this?!’ but all that came up was panicked screaming. Before long they were up above the lower rung of buildings and heading straight up into the air.

Gaspar was right: Frangipani wasn’t the most graceful of fliers. She had to dodge other buildings. Towers and cranes during her ascent, even ducking beneath an air trolly at one point. It was a little sickening as she looped around at all angles, and even Dante was trying to keep hold by biting hard on the back of Héctor’s jacket and clinging to the guitar on his back. And Leti just laughed and whooped the whole time.

“Don’t worry Papá!” she screeched. “We’ll be in the open air right… NOW!”

And they were. Now that there was nothing in their way the turbulence was gone and there was now smooth sailing. Héctor slowly released his death grip from his daughter, and Dante from his, when his stomach finally settled back into it’s natural position. Carefully he risked a lean to his right to look down below, and he gasped both at how high they were and how even more beautiful the city was from above. The lights from the streets illuminated the ground even more, and several more colors popped out now that they were free from the fog surrounding the flower bridges.

Amazing.

“Sorry Papá!” Leti said as she spread her arms wide enough to simulate flying herself. “But Frangipani is faster in the air than on the ground, and you don’t have all night. Besides, it’s a much better view up here than down there, right?”

And as the wind blew in his air and he could feel the smile growing on his face in pure wonderment, he couldn’t help but agree.

#somos familia #coco fanfiction #coco fanfic #pixar coco #coco pixar

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siryaksalot · 3 years

Text

Mink’s thorough and comprehensive list of pros and cons and stuff from the reboot after watching it all! Will contain spoilers. May update as I think of more. By the way, I’m a lifetime fan. I’m 22, so the whole time they’ve been away I’ve been here, loving the original.

PROS:

The animation. It’s great! Maybe the more neon bright colors are jarring after watching the original which is more washed out, but you get used to it. I can’t tell whether it’s Toonboom or Adobe Animate, but there’s a liiiiittle bit of sneaky puppeting of characters if you have an animators eye to look for it. And I do. When something is ESPECIALLY puppeted, I notice it but it doesn’t ruin anything. It doesn’t look cheap, it looks cost efficient. That being said if you HATE this type of animation you won’t be happy. I’m fine with it!

The character design is the big thing here. The Warners look fantastic and super sleek, all the credit to Genevieve Tsai, she’s a genius. Posing of characters is great too. It’s nice having a consistent look. Maybe you’ll miss the variety of the old 8 studios, but it’s okay.

The voices. Despite people saying Tress and Rob are older and sound different I think they sounded just the same. They were obviously well directed. It’s probably not Andrea Romano this time around but that’s okay.

Slapstick. It’s still the same, they didn’t hold back.

The music. Lovely as ever. We miss Richard Stone but it really was good either way.

The songs, lyrically, are all great! Clever songwriting I’ve come to expect.

EVERY PATB segment. I have close to no complaints about their skits. Just one, it’ll be below.

Them saying FUCK the Elmyra spinoff. Brain was busy these 22 years. That show never happened.

GOING HAM on Tucker Carlson. They absolutely tortured the guy. Fuck him.

The Warners still do their regular ol thing, go in on the jerks. I was afraid they’d be knocked around too much but no, they get control and succeed every time. Thank god.

I enjoyed Nils Niedhart coming back for a second round. The Warners have definitely tormented people more than once, it’s cool.

Seeing the inside of the tower more fleshed out! Me likey.

Yakko says sibs a lot. They know I wanted this. He also STILL does his Uhhhh. Good.

He also calls Wakko “baby bro” a few times and I 🥺🥺... gh...

Wakko and Brain saying hell. Wakko ALMOST saying motherfucker.

Yakko trying a few times to sing educational songs and Wakko and Dot having NONE of it. He gets really upset when he can’t do it, which is also hilarious

Yakko actually getting upset when no one is around to laugh at his jokes. I loved it. I’m glad this moment wasn’t dragged out as well.

CHICKEN BOO. CHICKEN FUCKIN BOO. YES IT WAS NICE TO SEE EVERYONE BUT. I LOVE CHICKEN BOO. HE IS TOP OF MY FANLIST.

The old Chubby Baby clown song playing deep and ominously over Nicklewise. LMAO

Like 15 uninterrupted seconds of Wakko without a hat. Baby. Baby boy.

Still got pretty good reference humor. A few I didn’t get, and that’s how you know it’s good LOL

The little Looney Tunes / Loonatics cameo.

CONS:

The “reboot it” song. Seriously, what happened to the voices? Rob sings ONE LINE as Yakko in the song, the rest is someone else??? And you can’t hear Dot for most of it. She’s just mouthing along I guess 🙄🙄

Adding to the previous, about 4 other people besides Jess Tress and Rob are credited for performing that song... so... hm. I don’t know which guy replaced Rob, but it’s one of them for sure.

The first episode in general was weak. Yes yes we get it, you need to be modern now. Just get to the funny skits.

Lack of Scratchy. I liked seeing him when we did but I love him... want more.

Speaking of him, his new long nose is BAD. Gives me Jewish caricature vibes. Bad.

No Slappy. I get why, you’d need Sherri and she might try to get Tom along with her. WB doesn’t want to pay Tom I GUESS.

The Cutening skit. The song sounds bad... it’s just a little weird. Tress isn’t singing it. Without the Warners on screen, you can barely tell it’s Animaniacs at all. The ending is gross. The beginning of it has some great lines, though. Hell I’m using one as my blog title now.

I dunno, the new original stuff didn’t appeal to me. I’m glad it was sparse.

SOME of the “goodnight everybodys” felt forced.

Hm... Dot’s line in the theme being changed. “Dot Has Wit”. I don’t think it was necessary. You can still say she’s cute, we all knew she was way more than her cuteness anyway! The new line throws me off for whatever reason despite being the same amount of syllables. idk, the flow is just odd.

Giving Brain backstory. It’s ... not a bad backstory persay but I feel this is a thing the original writers only have the right to do. I dunno.

The show says on MULTIPLE occasions that it’s “biting satire”. PLEASE... you don’t have to tell us. Over and over. Just make it biting and people will call it that. pointing it out feels SO forced.

Episode 6 having to be pulled because of the fuck up with Brain’s phone number. THAT is unprofessional. Did no one check??

After reflection... there may be TOO much politics. I think it should be toned down. There sure is a lot of Russian collusion jokes.

NEUTRAL:

The Warners call each other by name a LOT more now. I dig it but maybe it’s a TEEENY bit forced? Idk

Ralph has a brown uniform. Maybe it’s more accurate to the security guards at WB?

Plotz is in a portrait, but no mention of what happened to him. Going to assume he’s dead, LMAO

The new CEO! She’s not THAT interesting but I’ll give her time. She has a name but it’s not even mentioned in the show?? Uh ...

Scratchy saying that Hello Nurse is with Doctors Without Borders now. Good excuse. Good for her.

Saying Yakko can’t do math!! Did y’all see the multiplication song? ok this is a nitpick LMAOOO it’s just silly.

...The anime segment. It’s cool animation, I love Studio Yotta, but idk how to feel. It’s a little much.

The other new lines in the theme. They’re alright, maybe a bit too specific to fit the whole show, but it’s whatever. The conservatives will be mad and THAT makes me happy. 😋😋

The human designs are ugly but they’re definitely supposed to be. The were in the original show quite a bit too.

The reboot gets a solid 7/10 from me! 70% is good, the 30% will be very divsive I feel. It’s a mixed bag, with a majority of the mixture being good. It is NOT on equal footing with the original, but it comes close. If you liked the reboot, haven’t seen the OG? Watch it. I’m serious. Watch it.

#it’s long!#animaniacs #animaniatag #Reboot spoilers #animaniacs spoilers #mink thinks : ooc ;#these are my personal thoughts of course.#extra bits ;

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aerltarg · 3 years

Note

2, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 26, 27 from ask game

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?

oh, it's actually hard to answer bc pretty often my otps can work as brotps for me as well. it also means that when i can't ship some characters they don't work for me as friends either. not to mention that in asoiaf i'm open to many ships, and if i'm not very passionate about some it's not a sign i can't see them in romantic light.

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

may i say any sansa ship? 😭 as well as sansa herself lmao. idk generally i can't ship characters i don't like because i'm just not interested. and it's not to say i don't like book!sansa (show!sansa is another case 💀), i just don't find her arc as intriguing and epic as arcs of some other characters. however, it's absolutely her obnoxious fandom's fault that i don't want to touch anything about her now, pairings including. sansaery? pass. sansan? i used to have a soft spot for them in my heart but now? nah. sansa x anyone? pls have mercy, she's already a fandom bicycle.

and jonsa ofc. i would never mind some crack ship as i do this one if not for their obnoxious stans that did way too much to list there right now. but this burning desire to persuade every rock on the street that your crack ship is canon will never stop being ridiculous lmao

also braime. tbh i used to low-key like them but some of their stans weirded my away lol. i get that not all of them are like that but still. it's generally my great pain when i see braime/brienne/jaime stans who are also dany/targ antis. every time i see them i cackle and run away as fast as i can crying from disappointment lmao. it's really a pity because i'm either very neutral or like in my own way all three of them.

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

jonrya it is! i never hated them, you know, but they never were more than siblings and brotp to me. however, later i encountered the deluded crack ship fandom that shall not be named and understood that if there is any possible romance for jon with any of his sisters-cousins we all know which one it will be lmao. also their stans are very sweet and i really like many of their takes on arya and jon! i generally love relationships of jon and arya very much so it wasn't that difficult in practice to see them in a quite different light.

7. Is there anything you used to like but can't stand now?

meta culture lmao. reading different analysis and interpretations of the text used to be very interesting to me (and still is tbh but in other fandoms) though asoiaf is a different case. imo many people aren't honest in their so called theories and analyses. i get that all of us are biased but some "meta writers'" denial of their own biases influence fandom in a bad way. it looks like too many people run to them to get answers to their questions about any minor detail as if they were grrm himself. yk instead of using their own reading comprehension lmao. you see how this meta culture ruined fandom just looking at the most delusional stans and shippers who spread their agenda by writing endless text posts full of nonsense and bullshit but styled as oh so intellectual and thoughtful analysis. it's insane how many people actually buy it and don't check canon accuracy of such claims themselves. it got to the ridiculous point when random people try to argue with you with some far-fetched embarrassing "theories" as if they were canon facts or quotes straight up from a fanfic because they read somewhere some other confused soul's post and got from a context that this quote is canon (despite the fact that it wasn't written in grrm's style at all but some people can't use their brains even if their lives depended on it it seems).

anyway it's become too long and rambly already so tldr. because of such "neutral unbiased" analyses i got the habit of fact checking almost everything i see in such posts. there's only a small amount of meta writers from targ/dany/jon/arya stans that i trust because i know by practice and following them for some time that they don't pull anything out of nowhere, back up everything they say with canon quotes, don't decontextualize anything and (that is the most important thing to me) are reasonable and open to discussion unlike so many bnfs nowadays.

8. Have you received anon hate? What about?

ah, not in this fandom yet, god bless! i think i'm not loud enough for the needed amount of time to deserve it lol. but since i'm not going anywhere soon maybe one day i will 😂

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

robert baratheon and tywin lannister, obviously. tbh it's pretty hard for me to hate any characters because you know. they're fictional lmao. just lines on paper, they can't hurt you. and even such dudes as tywin or robert don't get real distaste from me if they're written well enough. my problem with them lies not only in their canon crimes and shitty consequences of those but in fandom's (or at least some parts of it) unwillingness to acknowledge that they're canonically written as shitty, not as stan/pity/worship material. tywin isn't as clever as some think and robert is a coward outside of battlefield, not to mention some absolutely disgusting denial of his nature from targ antis only because the man happened to be the most vocal targ hater in-universe so these folks feel like he is their main book representative and whitewash him completely lmao

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

uugh idk even. i'm either low-key interested (or used to be at least so i can stay pretty neutral for the sake of nostalgia lol) or too indifferent to really care.

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn't? Why?

all my faves have their own crowd of haters i'm afraid 😭 but let me say rhaegar. even among some dany/targ stans my man is so misunderstood lmao. it's not even his fault i dare say it's fanon about his half-imagined crimes that somehow got widespread to the unbelievable degree. and when i say they're half-imagined i'm being very generous actually. ofc he isn't perfect, no one in asoiaf is. and yes, he's a pre-series dead minor character but almost all little information about him is actually positive, not to mention the narrative itself that doesn't paint him as a villain or just a shitty dude. on the contrary, he's an idealized to some degree dead prince who could've been a good king (like some other historical targaryens, jacaerys, baelor breakspear, aemon son of jaehaerys, etc.), a mysterious yet tragic figure. i have much to say about why it's so popular to shit on him in fandom but yeah. his haters should send their complaints to grrm instead, no one forced the man to write him like that lol. and i mean that no one has to like him ofc. but it's misinterpretation of the text to claim he was intentionally written as a villain or smth by grrm.

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn't? Why?

i don't know if it counts as unpopular but i would say tyrion's arc as a whole because i enjoy his character and like in my own way. i can get why some people don't like him but this man will always have his own place in my heart i must admit.

13. Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

is this unpopular tho?.. ok but renly wouldn't make a terrible king. i dare say he would be better than both robert and stannis. yes, he wasn't shown as perfect and i don't claim this. he wouldn't be the best or the most brilliant or the most just or noble. yet still better than his brothers. his flaws weren't anything other high lords didn't have, his mistakes weren't anything other lords and kings didn't do. in many ways he would make a better job than robert or stannis, too bad he died so early, even though i get why it was important for the narrative.

26. Most shippable character?

well generally for me it's the ones i love the most lol. jonerys/snowstorm is my never dying otp but i admit my sins, sometimes i just see dany with other characters (often from other fandoms pls don't @ me). however, since dany is THE fave of mine it means i would rather twist the other guy or girl to fit into the good match for her than twist her for another character in my new born crack ship lol. and i never stay for too long with the ships with which i feel they don't really fit and don't do justice for each other lol. maybe that's the reason i'm not much of a rare shipper / crack shipper afshdjdb

27. Least shippable character?

everyone i don't like? 😭 as i've said sansa for the reasons above lol. you can insert many others in her place lmao

#thanks for the ask!#.txt #mypost #ask game #anonymous #*answered

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myaekingheart · 3 years

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129. Sick of It

read the scarecrow and the bell on ao3 index | from the beginning | < previous | next >

I ran away from you, I took everything Facing the day I turned my back Just the way you showed me I'd say I've changed so you're right And you've stayed the same I stepped away from you I won't be coming back -Sick of It, Evans Blue

Rei loomed over the sink, eyes tired and arm aching with each vigorous motion of her toothbrush. Her gums tingled and her throat clenched—her gag reflex always was a little too strong. Foamy toothpaste dribbled down her chin, making her look much like a dog with rabies.

Rubbing his eyes, Kakashi yawned and leaned against the doorway, watching her with heightened intrigue. When she spat into the sink, he caught sight of a few tendrils of blood mixed within her spit. The corner of his lips tugged upwared in a small smirk. “Have all those years of skipping out on brushing finally caught up with you?” he jested, inching nearer.

Rei wiped the excess toothpaste from her mouth with the back of her hand, grimacing at him. “Have all those years of being a pain in the ass finally caught up with you?” she snapped. The malice in her tone caused Kakashi to retract, pursing his lips and averting his eyes. He had no idea what was with her lately, but it seemed that every day she grew more and more abrasive. At first he merely chalked it up to the stress of her job, but that excuse was becoming more fragile with each passing day. He hadn’t done anything to warrant such attacks in the first place and quite frankly, he was starting to get tired of it.

The sad, defeated look on his face was a stark reminder of just how harsh her words had been. Rei’s face softened, a sigh breaking past her lips. “Fuck, Kakashi, I-I’m sorry…” she murmured, dropping her eyes to the ground. “I didn’t mean to yell at you, I just…I’ve had a lot on my mind lately, I don’t know.”

He didn’t think that was much of an excuse but he could tell that her remorse was genuine. “What’s the matter?” he asked. His eyes slowly drifted up from the floor to look at her, her face filled with forlorn panic. For a moment, he was afraid she was about to cry. He inched nearer, took her hands in his. “Rei, what’s going on?”

Rei squeezed his hands gently, tried to organize her thoughts into something comprehensible. “It’s about my parents. I just…I think I finally need to tell them about my promotion” she finally explained, voice quiet and methodical.

“Oh…” Kakashi murmured. With a groan, Rei pressed her forehead against his bare chest.

“I’ve just…I know I’ve been putting this off for way too long” she continued. “And it’s because I’m honestly fucking terrified. I don’t know how they’re going to react, but I know it won’t be good. I wish I didn’t have to say anything at all, and I know I could technically get away with that, but…it just doesn’t feel right. And the longer I wait, the more stressed out I get. I just…I need to let them know, Kakashi.”

“I know” Kakashi replied, gently rubbing her forearm. “I think you’re doing the right thing” he continued. “You can’t hide it from them forever.” He hated to think of how they would react should something happen to her in the line of duty. Not only would they be heartbroken that their daughter was injured—or worse, killed (Kakashi couldn’t bear the thought)—but they certainly wouldn’t be too pleased to know that she had withheld such vital information from them, too.

Rei sighed and nodded against his chest, hugging him tight for a moment longer. She truly did appreciate his support, but if only that were enough to lessen her anxiety. It was her day off and she knew that she wouldn’t be able to relax until she met with her parents and organized how she wanted to go about this. Of course, she knew she wouldn’t be able to relax after the fact, either, but at least she would get things over with. At least they would know. Toshio sidled up beside her, nudging her hand in solidarity and licking at her fingertips, and Rei felt grateful that she wouldn’t have to do this alone.

The walk to the bookshop gave Rei ample time to think and consider how she wanted to go about this. A blunt and immediate delivery would be too abrupt—she needed to wade through this carefully, to ease them into it so that the announcement would be less of a shock.

As she turned the corner, she caught sight of an unusually large crowd congregating outside Kaminoki. She recounted the dates in her head, trying to pinpoint whether there was an anticipated new release, but then it hit her: it was the final week of May. Every year during this time, Kaminoki hosted an inaugural used book sale to welcome the summer months. Many students had been assigned summer reading lists by their teachers so she bookshop saw more traffic than usual and, in the interest of money, of course Yuruganai had no other option but to take advantage of the opportunity.

The crowd was thick and rowdy with small children weaving through clusters of disgruntled adults and shrieking with laughter. There was no way Rei could fight her way inside. Her parents would probably be far too busy to deal with her, anyway. She would just have to come back some other time.

As she slowly turned on her heels, Toshio took hold of the hem of her dress and tugged hard. A growl rose up from deep within his chest, primal and demanding. Rei gasped and stared down at him in confusion. “Toshio, what the fuck?!” she exclaimed. A few tight-laced mothers shot a warning glare to watch her language. Try as she might, Rei could not manage to break free of the dog’s grip. The more she protested, the harder he pulled until she heard a brief ripping sound and noticed the hem of her skirt beginning to tear. “Alright, alright, fine! You win” Rei muttered under her breath, defeated. She swatted Toshio off of her with a frown. “But next time, use less damaging methods” she warned. Toshio grinned as he guided her through the crowd, clearly far too pleased with his success.

The chaos only amplified inside the store. Rei clung to Toshio’s collar as he guided her toward the register, her anxiety rising in the back of her throat. Hana met her daughter’s tense gaze for a brief moment, affording her a small but frantic smile as she handed another book off to an impatient customer. Meanwhile, Toshio invited himself behind the counter and dug into one of the wicker organizer baskets in which Hana kept a small jar of dog biscuits. He figured it was only right to treat himself. After all, he was doing a stupendous job of being a very good boy.

Once she had a moment to breathe, Hana turned to her daughter to exchange knowing glances. This was one of many things that Rei did not miss about the bookshop—she could never keep up with the demands of such unruly customers. She could tell her mother was clearly frazzled and tired, her low ponytail in disarray and her apron laying crooked. Rei would have to make this quick—not that that was the worst thing in the world.

“I hope you’ve come to help out” Hana chuckled, though she knew the chance was slim.

“Actually, I came to ask you something” Rei replied. She could sense an irate customer stalking up behind her, the threat of a complaint ready to burst forth from his mouth. Before he could even make a sound, Rei reached behind the counter to grab a copy of The History of Ninjutsu and slapped it firmly in his hands before turning him around and giving him a light shove toward the door. Hana opened her mouth to protest, but no sound came out. When Rei whipped back around, a sour smile touched her lips as she abruptly asked, “Cane we meet up for dinner sometime this week?”

Hana blinked, her mouth opening and closing as she tried to form a response. Finally, she croaked, “O-of course.”

“Alright, great” Rei replied, clapping her mother hard on the shoulder. “Kakashi and I will be over at 6:30pm on Wednesday night. See you then.” Before Hana could even utter a response, Rei whipped around and booked it out of the store, abandoning her mother in the overwhelming chaos.

Rei sucked in a sharp breath as she stepped out into the street. She never realized how suffocating confrontation was until she was at the tail-end of it, separated from the crowds and the deafening white noise. She clung to Toshio as he led her home, at least taking comfort in knowing that should her jelly-legs falter beneath her, he would catch her without a moment of hesitation.

Wednesday night came far too quickly for Rei’s comfort. Kakashi had hoped that having a plan in place would alleviate some of her stress, but instead it only seemed to amplify it. He watched as she stood in front of their bedroom mirror pinching her sides and sucking in her gut as she cycled through five different outfits.

“Do you think my mom is going to tell me I’m fat?” Rei suddenly asked. Kakashi blinked, trying to comprehend where the question even came from. She glanced at him, recognizing his unsettled confusion, and elaborated. “I just don’t want her to think I’m getting fat and make a remark on it or, I don’t know, eye whatever is on my plate and get all judgy.”

“Why?” Kakashi asked. He didn’t see Hana as the type of make such abrupt comments. “Do you think you’re fat?”

The question was apparently not the proper one to ask. Rei shot him a fierce glare then as she spat back, “Do you?”

Sighing, Kakashi shook his head. “No, Rei, I do not think you’re fat.” He was constantly amazed and perplexed at how lately she could manage to weaponize anything and everything he said. His mind was beginning to grow raw with her constant ire. Just one more night, Kakashi thought to himself. One more night and then we’ll find some relief.

The one thing Rei was actually looking forward to in all of this was her mother’s cooking. Not that Kakashi was a terrible cook—not at all—but she missed the warm comfort meals of her childhood, and the luxury of knowing that she was not responsible for anything. Her mother had a certain magic to her in the kitchen. She had a way of making anything taste good, even from the most unappealing ingredients. A housewife extraordinaire, even. Tonight of all nights, she made one of Rei’s favorites: subuta.

Hana, Yuruganai, and even Grandma Teiko eyed Rei carefully as she took the first bite of her food. She didn’t understood why they were all staring at her. The expectancy in their gazes only heightened Rei’s anxiety further.

“So, any special reason why you wanted a big family dinner?” Grandma Teiko asked, cocking a brow. Th knowing smirk on her face terrified Rei. She knew something, and Rei wasn’t sure if that brought her relief or additional panic.

“What do you mean?” Rei asked, swallowing hard. The food tasted unexpectedly horrible, like her mother had cooked in a copper pot rife with patina. She took a long swig of water to wash away the rancid, metallic flavor and for a fleeting moment, wondered if they were poisoning her.

Yuruganai glared at his daughter over the tops of his glasses, challenging her to continue playing dumb. Kakashi took hold of Rei’s hand under the table, fed her a little encouraging smile. Toshio rested his head in her lap.

“Okay” Rei started, sucking in a sharp breath. “So, there’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you guys. It’s kind of a big deal, though, so just…bare with me.”

Kakashi could sense the anxiety in her tone, the uncertainty and fear. He squeezed her hand lightly and hoped it served as a solid reminder that she was not alone in this.

“Well? What is it?” Yuruganai asked impatiently.

Rei opened her mouth to speak, to finally let the announcement spill out, but was quickly interrupted by her mother. “Oh, I think I know what’s going on!” she suddenly exclaimed, voice rising an octave with excitement.

“Y-you do…?” Rei asked. After what Arai had said in the locker room, she hadn’t expected her mother to not only guess it so quickly but to be so delighted. She never celebrated her daughter’s pursuit of danger.

Hana nodded vigorously, unable to wipe the smile off her face. And then she said it—the last thing Rei had ever expected or even wanted her to say. “You and Kakashi are expecting! Is that it? Is that what it is? Is my little girl finally going to be a mother?”

All the color drained from Rei’s face in that moment and she felt her already anxious stomach flip. She glanced to Kakashi for reassurance but he seemed just as shellshocked as she was. Toshio whined and propped his chin on the table, sticking his long, spotted tongue out in an effort to steal some of her food.

“Oh, this is the best news!” Hana laughed, teary-eyed. She reached across the table to take hold of Rei’s free hand. “Now you can finally put away all those silly ninja dreams once and for all! We won’t have to worry about you getting hurt anymore! I’d break out the sake to celebrate but we all know pregnant woman can’t have alcohol!” Hana’s eyes darted to Rei’s stomach, as if attempting to judge whether she was already beginning to show. Overwhelmed with delight, she was eager to know everything: how far along Rei was, if they had gotten an ultrasound yet, mood swings, cravings, baby names, nursery ideas.

Rei sucked her teeth and tugged her hand sharply out of her mother’s grasp. “Actually” she corrected, her tone cutting, “that’s not it at all.”

Grandma Teiko hummed under her breath, shooting her daughter-in-law an amused little expression. A silent jab about how she jumped the gun and look at the mess you’ve made now.

Hana’s face fell. “I-It’s not…?” she croaked. She drew her hand up to her chest, her heartbeat increasing with newfound fear. “It must be about the wedding then! Right?” she asked, and it was obvious how desperately she was grappling for her sanity here. How the fear of what was really going on rooted deep within the pit of her chest.

“No, it’s not” Rei said through gritted teeth. “But thanks for making your feelings so clearly known.”

“Well?” Yuruganai shot back. “Then what is going on?”

Rei pursed her lips, narrowing her eyes as her gaze locked on both of them across the table. “Sorry to disappoint you, but I actually made ANBU captain. Which, by the way, is a really big fucking deal.” She could feel her mouth beginning to build up with excess spit, the tip of her nose tingling and her hands going numb. That metallic taste in her mouth only grew stronger. She slammed her chopsticks down on the table and promptly rose to her feet. “But I doubt any of you would be happy about that, would you? You can’t possibly find it in yourselves to be proud of me for something like that. I’m nothing but some sort of vessel for making babies, aren’t I? That’s all you think I’m good for? All you think I should be doing with my life? Well, maybe I don’t even want kids in the first place! Did you ever consider that? Did you ever consider what I want? Of course you didn’t! You never do! You’ve always tried to shove me down whatever path you thought was best for me but you better make peace real fast with the path I am taking because you know what? The Natsuki line ends with me.”

Before her family could even argue, Rei spun around the corner and raced down the hallway. Her heavy footfalls echoed through the apartment, desperate and heartbroken.

The hallway swayed and pulsed in front of her, the floor warping beneath her feet. Rei could feel her rapid heart threatening to beat straight out of her chest. She launched herself into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her, and collapsed on the cold tile floor.

The dining room fell silent in the wake of Rei’s outburst. Hana buried her face in her hands, whimpering, as Yuruganai slammed his cup down on the table. “After all these years…you’d think she’d finally learn a thing or two about respect.”

“Now, Yuri—” Teiko began, but her son didn’t seem to care.

“No” Yuruganai fired back. “No, she doesn’t have the privilege of speaking to us this way. We fed her for eighteen years, we clothed her, we provided a roof over her head. All we asked in return as that she respect our wishes but she can’t even do that. Instead, she decides to go out and waste her time with this godawful ninja shit. And a captain of all things! Stuck in her romanticizing of this disgusting institution. She’s a dishonor.”

Kakashi knew better than to inject himself into Rei’s parents’ affairs. He knew that their tolerance of him was already thin, but he refused to sit idly by while they belittled and insulted his fiancée. He didn’t care if they were her family or not. “Well, I’m proud of her” he finally said, locking eyes with Yuruganai. “Your daughter has worked hard to get where she is. I’ve seen firsthand how seriously she takes her job, and how much she loves doing what she does. She was meant for this whether you see any merit in it or not.”

“Hmph, that’s easy for you to say” Yuruganai muttered, mocking and sharp. He expected nothing less from Friend Killer Kakashi, ninja extraordinaire. Of course he’d support Rei’s pursuit of such a terrible career. He had dedicated his entire life to being a shinobi. Despite all of this, however, Yuruganai refused to meet Kakashi’s gaze. Deep down, he hated to admit that he feared Kakashi.

“Well” Grandma Teiko began, reaching across the table to set a veiny hand atop Kakashi’s. “If nothing else, I am proud of Rei’s achievements.” Her warm smile, her gentle touch, filled Kakashi with a sense of hope and relief. They exchanged a brief expression of understanding, of mutual support, before Teiko shot a fierce glare to her son and daughter-in-law. “And you two” she snarled. “You should both be ashamed of yourselves. Your daughter has done something very few are strong enough to do, and yet you cast her aside and treat her like shit! Your own flesh and blood! Not to mention she did all of this without the support of either of you. And that’s something to really admire.”

The room fell silent yet again as Hana and Yuruganai stewed in Teiko’s sharp, honest words. They hung heavy in the air, weight like lead upon their ungrateful shoulders. Toshio lumbered forward and licked her elbow in silent support. A brief smile flashed on the old woman’s face as she scratched behind his ear and fed him a coveted piece of pork.

After a long moment, Hana cleared her throat and whimpered, “Rei’s been back there for a while, I-I better go check on her.” As she went to stand, however, Kakashi extended an arm to halt her.

“I’ll do it” he said. He knew she would be far more receptive to him than her mother right now. Besides, he needed to ensure that she was okay on his own.

Toshio dutifully accompanied Kakashi down the hallway, racing forward and pawing at the door. Kaksahi idled outside for only a moment, catching the muffled echoes of Rei vomiting inside. When her wretching seemed to finally die down, he sucked in a deep breath and knocked on the door. “Rei? Are you alright?” he asked. “Can I come in?” The toilet flushed and the door slowly creaked open. Rei wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, her face pale and damp with sweat. Dark circles bloomed benath her eyes and her entire body trembled. She could hardly look at him. Again, Kakashi asked, “Are you alright?”

Rei shook her head, wrapped her arms around her waist. Voice soft and barely audible, she whispered hoarsely, “I just want to go home.” Dumbfounded, Kakashi nodded in agreement.

Hana and Yuruganai watched as Kakashi slipped back into the dining room and began quietly gathering Rei’s things. He scooped her purse up in his arm and softly explained, “Rei’s not feeling well. I think it’s best if we just go home.” Neither her mother nor father protested.

Kakashi wrapped an arm around his fiancée as he helped her down the stairs, Toshio walking ahead of them as if acting as both guide and protector. Rei clung to Kakashi as the stairwell seemed to shift and sway, exercising extra caution so as to not trip with each step. Once they reached the empty store below, she squeezed his forearm to pause him. He gazed at her anxiously in the murky darkness, watching as she shut her eyes and sucked in a deep breath. She needed a moment to steady herself, to calm the uproar in her stomach. He rubbed the small of her back as she did so and allowed her time enough to refocus. The apartment door above them creaked open. Footsteps bumbled down the stairs.

“Kakashi, oh god…” Rei whimpered, clinging to his arm. She envisioned her father coming after her, ready to berate her even further. She hadn’t wanted to say goodbye to anyone for that very reason. She din’t want anything to do with them anymore.

“Shh, Rei, it’s okay, I’m right here” Kakashi assured her, adopting a protective stance. If her father even so much as considered causing Rei more harm, Kakashi would have no choice but to defend her—physically, emotionally, or otherwise. No matter what, he would always defend her.

Kakashi squinted through the darkness as a hunched figure hobbled nearer and relief washed over him. The tapping of her cane immediately filled Rei with an equal sense of calm. “Didn’t think you could leave without saying goodbye to me now, did you?” she laughed.

Rei slowly turned as Grandma Teiko approached, the old woman cupping her face in her hands. Rei allowed herself to fall into her comforting touch, closing her eyes and whimpering softly.

“Don’t you worry, girl” Teiko smiled. “Everything is going to be just fine.”

“But how do you know?” Rei whispered, meeting the old woman’s gaze. Within her question was an undertone of regret, of fear and sadness. Grandma Teiko knew nothing of the struggles Rei had faced in the past month. Not really. She didn’t know the heartbreak and confusion of this strange new change. Of Rei’s desperation for a child dashed by the promise of prominence in her career. She didn’t know the heavy weight that rested squarely on Rei’s chest every single day at the thought of what she had given up, at how badly she realized she did, in fact, want a baby. Of Rei’s fear that perhaps this promotion was all a mistake, that she was not actually good enough, that she was not a strong enough leader, that she would lead yet another comrade to their death. It was all so heavy, and grew even moreso with every passing day. Paralyzing, debilitating, unbearable.

But Rei’s silent suffering changed nothing for Grandma Teiko. Her suffering wasn’t quite so silent as it seemed. She could see Rei’s heartache in the way she curled in on herself, the way her hands shook and her eyes grew weary. It was no secret that Rei was spiralling.

“Because I know everything, girl” Grandma Teiko replied, narrowing her eyes with amused confidence. “And I won’t allow any different.” Rei couldn’t comprehend how she could be so confident, how her optimism managed to shine like a beacon in the foggy night. Teiko patted Rei’s cheek like a small child and continued. “I am so damn proud of you. You know that?” she asked. Her words dripped with ingenuity. A sob broke past Rei’s lips. “I am so happy for you and everything you’ve accomplished. You’re getting everything you’ve ever wanted and you deserve people who will celebrate that. Rei, you deserve to be happy and supported.” She brushed the bangs back out of her granddaughter’s face, her thumb tracing the edge of that nasty scar. “A captain of the ANBU black ops is truly something worth celebrating. Not everyone has the strength, intelligence, and gumption to achieve what you have but you want to know something? I wouldn’t have expected anything less from my incredible granddaughter. You excel at whatever you put your mind to and I wouldn’t be surprised if you ended up becoming the best damn captain the black ops has ever seen. You’ve always been destined for greatness, Rei. Even if other people don’t see it, I see it. Kakashi sees it. And more importantly, I hope you see it. Or else you wouldn’t have gotten this far.”

Rei’s face contorted as she tried to swallow back her tears but it was no use. She fell into Grandma Teiko’s embrace and sobbed violently into her shoulder, hugging her tight and allowing her tears to stain the sleeve of the old woman’s kimono. After all these years, Teiko’s faith never wavered. There would never be an accurate way for Rei to express her gratitude, it was too astronomical for words. Rei only hoped that her appreciation was clear enough.

“Go on and rest now, girl” Grandma Teiko finally said, puling away after a long, desperate embrace. Rei sniffled and nodded, her head starting to pound. She watched then as Grandma Teiko skirted around the checkout counter and produced a half-empty jar of umeboshi from the shelf. She placed it in Rei’s grasp with a tender pat to the hand and added, “Take these for the road. You’re going to need them.”

While Rei still was not a fan of pickled plums, she knew their merit in alleviating nausea was worth stomaching. She thanked Grandma Teiko as she placed a tender kiss on the tip of her nose and sent her on her way.

Kakashi glanced back at the old woman over his shoulder, mouthing a soft thank you as they exited the store. Grandma Teiko gave a single nod before coughing into the crook of her elbow, and it was hard to tell in the darkness but Kakashi swore he caught a hint of blood on her sleeve. His heart leapt into his throat, questioning his own eyes, before shoving the thoughts completely out of his mind. It was dark, and he was tired, and his vision was only playing tricks on him. Besides, he could not allow himself to worry. Rei needed him and if he showed any signs of distress, they would be detected immediately and only make her condition worse.

Rei nestled into his strong embrace as they slowly walked home together. Toshio barked and leapt happily on the way, snapping at fireflies floating lazily through the night sky. He took delight in knowing that they did not need to rush, that they could not rush. Besides, he knew Rei was unwell and wanted to give her something to smile about.

Rei had never expected tonight to go smoothly. She was not naïve. She had already been through this so many times that by now, the resistance seemed routine. If only that helped to alleviate the sting of it all. No matter what, nothing ever seemed to prepare her for the strength of her parents’ abrasive opposition. Each conflict seemed to hurt as much as the first, if not more.

As depressed as she still was, and would likely continue to be, at least the silver lining amid all of this was Grandma Teiko. A soft smile touched Rei’s lips as she allowed herself a moment to be incredibly, overwhelmingly, beautifully grateful for such a blessing in her life. When all else failed and the world seemed to crash around her, Teiko was there. Rei truly could not have asked for a better mentor, a better companion, a better grandmother.

#rei natsuki #kakashi hatake #kakashi x oc #the scarecrow and the bell #naruto #naruto oc #fanfiction

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myassbrokethefall · 4 years

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I'm halfway through s2 of Sex Education. I decided to take a break cause while there are storylines and relationships I'm invested in, I have no patience for love triangles and the like atm. I remember you posting something about a disappointing twist for GA's character so I looked it up because idk when/if I'll pick up the show again and woah, I did not expect that AT ALL. I don't think it makes much sense and it does seem like an unfortunate trend for her characters [tbc]

[cont] (obviously the thing itself is not bad, and I'm sure the Sex Education writers will do it better than txf's - the bar is low in that regard anyway - but it still leaves an unpleasant taste in my mouth)

Yeah. Honestly I would not NOT be on board with it necessarily, if it weren’t for the UNFORTUNATE context of the repetitive grimness of the Scully situation. And especially the last “shock” twist of MS4 and Gillian’s apparent unhappiness with it. And even all mixed in, for me at least, with the withholding of the script and all that bullshit. Just like some ugly gendered power dynamics shit. The tentacles of CC continue to reach outwards. Sigh.

While I enjoyed S2 of Sex Ed a lot overall, I found the ending frustrating on many levels. I felt they either fizzled/dropped the ball on some of the storylines, or went with bummer twists that didn’t really feel earned to me. I also felt like they have not completely nailed down the tone that they want for the show, and it vacillated way too hard for me between “fun raunch” and “earnest PSA,” at the end especially. And very much that they did the sitcom thing of picking certain beats that would be the plot and kind of forcing those through, and just letting everything else that they set up nonsensically fall by the wayside.

Most egregious example for me (Sex Education S2 spoilers ahead, obviously): Jean’s confidential notes getting spread all over school (BY THE HEADMASTER, which was straight-up ridiculous to me no matter how much a mustachioed villain they are making him), and this EXTREMELY egregious confidentiality breach of dozens of minor children’s sensitive personal health information making barely an impact beyond furthering the plot of the rivalry between Jean and the headmaster in the context of his wife leaving him. Like, this would have major MAJOR ramifications for everyone, the headmaster should like, go to jail for doing that, Jean should have been WAAAAAYYYYY more upset about what that does to her professional credibility and how it affected the lives of literally every one of her advisees at the school and how many of them maybe will never trust a therapist ever again...and yet it seems to barely register with her, or with anyone else. And is more set up like, haha what a big disaster oh noes! This crazy high school. And instead the big climactic conflict with Jean at the end is...she’s upset that Otis was doing the sex clinic at school. Which is also not good? I guess? But I feel would be like a tenth of the badness of her fucking patient notes getting stolen and her being made to look like an unprofessional, incompetent, unethical therapist? To a degree far far beyond “grr that mean headmaster, what a jerk”? But they wanted an ending conflict between Jean and Otis so they like, picked that one. Thematically it makes sense since that was the start of the whole series, but in a like, stuff happening to people way, I feel the correct scale for that issue would have been a mild “Otis, I know you were trying to help and I’m sure I have myself to blame for this in a lot of ways, but, it’s not ethical to do that and certainly not to make money from it.” Instead of this BREACH OF TRUST!!! I CAN NO LONGER SPEAK TO YOU stuff that it didn’t really warrant, to my mind.

My other beef was that so much (rightly so) was made of Aimee’s trauma and how it affected her in lingering, unexpected ways, and that was heartwarming and lovely to see her friends and her boyfriend be understanding and supportive of her and help her work through it. ...And then, during the over-the-top sex musical (here I am agreeing with the mean headmaster that this was highly inappropriate for a high school...), literal dick puppets are being dangled unexpectedly next to people’s faces in the dark in the audience, and there was no concern that THIS might be traumatic to Aimee? Or like, anyone else who might be an assault survivor and might not enjoy being startled by dicks? This is what I mean by the tone being inconsistent. And I know life is not tonally consistent, and people don’t always react in ways that others or even they expect. But after going through that whole arc with Aimee I was kinda like “no concerns at all about this eh?”

Anyway. I really like the show a lot but I wondered if they were rushed writing the ending or something. I have more BEEFS with some of the storylines but those are some of the bigger ones.

But yeah, the pregnancy thing, while it felt sort of like cheap shock drama that the show frankly should be too good for, was not at the top of my list of complaints. At least, I do have a great, and I think justified, hope that whatever they do with that plot, it will be done with more sensitivity, intelligence, nuance, and comprehensibility of how the female body works than on XF.

(And in general, this is a continuing series, so any issues that I have with the storylines as “resolved,” they will still have plenty of chances to elaborate on in the next season.)

#my opinion only!#still a show i love #sex ed #sex education spoilers #sorry this is so ranty i've been holding it all in lol #Anonymous

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butterflybrianna · 4 years

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My heart is with everyone at the protests. I am with you in spirit. If I could be there I would, however as someone who is considered high risk for Covid-19 I must take precautions and I'm still social distancing.

If you are like me and unable to go to the protests for whatever reason, I've compiled a list of things you can still do from home to support the BLM movement. This is not a comprehensive list. I tried my best to research and vet any links/sources I used, however I am human. If something is incorrect let me know and I will change it.

Learn the statistics.

The United States has 5% of the worlds population but we make up about 21% of the worlds prisoners. https://www.naacp.org/criminal-justice-fact-sheet/

In 2014, African Americans made up 34% of the country's prisoners. They are incarcerated at more than 5 times the rate of whites. https://www.naacp.org/criminal-justice-fact-sheet/

If African Americans and Hispanics were incarcerated at the same rate as whites, the prison population would decline by 40%. https://www.naacp.org/criminal-justice-fact-sheet/

This isn't because they do more crime. In 2015, the National Survey on Drug Use and Health showed about 17 million whites reported using an illicit drug in the last month, while only 4 million African Americans reported using an illicit drug. https://www.naacp.org/criminal-justice-fact-sheet/

We all know that a criminal record can reduce chances of getting a job, but it affects African Americans even more so. https://www.naacp.org/criminal-justice-fact-sheet/

African Americans are the group most likely to be killed by law enforcement, followed by Native Americans and Latinx. Whites are at the bottom of this statistic. http://www.cjcj.org/news/8113

Learn about the experiences of our black friends, family, and community members. Read stories written by them. Watch their videos talking about it. Watch TV shows like "Blackish" and "Grownish". If you are white then you need to admit that you don't know what it's like. You can sympathize. You can have empathy. But you don't know. Educate yourself. It is not their job to educate you. It is your job to educate yourself. Do not just ask your black friends and family. We live in a world where media like this is readily available. Take advantage of the internet and do your own damn research.

Sign petitions. Use your voice from home. This website has a list of petitions that you can sign.

https://blacklivesmatter.com/petitions/

https://act.colorofchange.org/sign/justiceforfloyd_george_floyd_minneapolis

Do not simply use Change.org. They are a for-profit organization, and there is some question to their validity. Sure, you can still sign a change.org petition because it won't hurt but look for others through valid websites too.

If you can, donate. https://secure.actblue.com/donate/ms_blm_homepage_2019

https://actionnetwork.org/fundraising/donate-to-the-one-struggle-kc-legal-fund

https://www.paypal.me/campaignzero

Support black businesses. Don't support businesses that support/advertise to/on white-supremacists groups. Here is a directory for finding black businesses.

https://officialblackwallstreet.com/directory/

Call/write to your state legislators. Let them know you support criminal justice reform. This would reduce mandatory minimum sentences, especially for things like non-violent drug crimes. That you support passing alternatives to incarceration. That you want weed decriminalized. The list goes on and on. Also research restorative justice. This will give you a good idea of why this is important, and what solutions could look like. Tell them you support mandatory deescalation training for police.

Contact your police chief. Tell him you support mandatory deescalation training.

Educate others about the fact that BLM is not a violent group and that those are fringe groups who are using the BLM movement to try and justify their violence. Remember, not all white people are part of the KKK. Not all violent groups are part of the BLM movement.

Do not stay quiet about that racist joke your friend just told. Staying quiet is staying complaint with racism. Speak up.

Stop talking about the riots and looting. If that's the only thing you are upset about then you are ignoring the real problem. A lot of the riots and such were started by either police sympathizers/plain clothes cops or fringe groups. No, I'm not saying it's right. But people have been peacefully protesting for YEARS. It's been ignored. Along with this, focusing on the riots is giving voice to the idea that BLM is wrong. It's giving voice to those who oppose BLM. Stop it. Stop talking about it. Stop focusing on it. The BLM group isn't who is starting them. The BLM group is bigger than that. And if you still don't believe that, remember that we've been peaceful for years. The Ferguson Unrest was 6 years ago.

Stop with the "all lives matter" shit or the "not all cops are bad" shit. We know this. We aren't saying they don't matter. Or that every single cop is a racist asshole. However, white lives are not at risk. We are not dying daily because of police brutality. I don't have to fear for my life if a cop pulls me over. These two sentences take away the focus from what is going on.

Join Campaign Zero. They talk about how to stop police brutality. They go over various steps/have a tangible plan they explain. https://www.joincampaignzero.org/#vision

Use your privilege. Maybe you can't go to the protests. But, if you are out grocery shopping or something and you see something that looks fishy, stick around. Speak up if needed. When you speak up, talk calmly and respectively. You are not there to make the situation worse. If you don't feel like you can speak up, still stick around. Record. If the cops leave, make sure those who were being targeted feel safe and that they can safely get to their car/where they were going. You can do this while still maintaining social distancing for the most part and you aren't in as large a group as protesters are, if you are like me and it's the pandemic stopping you from joining.

Take a personal inventory on your own privilege. Think about it. Write it down. Write ideas down on how you can use it to help. Research those ideas. Figure out ways to implement your privilege to help others. This is not a comprehensive list. There is more that we can do from home. There is more that we need to do. Sitting at home and saying "Well, I would be at the protests if I could but I can't so there isn't anything I can do" is bullshit. It is a lie. It is a way to make yourself feel better while turning a blind eye to those who need our help and our voices. Yes. Covid-19 is a real reason to stay away from the protests, especially if you are immunocomprimised or otherwise high risk. But the protests are not the only thing that we can do. They are not the only thing we should be doing.

#brianna speaks #blacklivesmatter #blacklivesalwaysmatter

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embidoesocrp · 4 years

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Comprehensive RP Standards & Rules

Please Note: If I’m slow or unable to reply, there’s likely a very good reason behind it (ie. mental illness/lack of spoons, inability to get into character, personal matters, etc). All I ask is that you’re patient and understanding -- we’re only human after all! You can even occasionally inquire updates from my end since I do care about keeping both of us up-to-date. Thanks for understanding!

RP Standards & Guidelines

This RPer is friendly/practices [unless otherwise stated] towards the following:

OCs and muses

Multi-verse & AU’s (unless otherwise stated or specified in RP Blog descriptions)

Smut/SRP, NSFW, Fluff, Dark/Triggering content

Trigger Warnings will be tagged respectively -- please notify the mun if you’d like a TW tagged on a post!

SRP will be censored via Read-More Feature

Multi-ships – both platonically & romantically; Canon×OCs are welcome!

by default, i make ships strictly tied to a respective relationship sub-verse tag -- main verses are usually left without a permanent relationship.

because the mun welcomes almost all kinds of ships (albeit depending on the fandom), be sure to check for respective ship tags in order to blacklist appropriately for those you do not like!

Chemistry/Relations between muses = RP/Interacting with each other

This way, I’m able to get a feel for how you portray your muses, and can determine whether or not there’s compatibility. This also helps me understand you as an RPer, too!

regardless of muses being canon or OC’s, please consider having some chemistry (interactions/threads) done before trying to ship with my muses!

As much as I advocate having All the Ships™, jumping straight into ships without getting a feel of your muse(s) makes it difficult for me to get into them. (´・ω・｀) Apologies about that!

pre-plotted/pre-existing relationships will require that we’ve RP’d together enough for me to get a feel of your RP style, especially with OC’s.

canon characters & their canonical history/relations are assumed to be their default and are thus taken into consideration unless circumstances (i.e. AU’s, verses, etc.) state otherwise

regardless, i would still highly recommend we interact with each other enough so that I get a feel of your portrayal!

Format Leniency™ w/ icons, rp length and formatting as well as script-style and paragraph-style RPing (link for info on ‘em)

script-style/in-character RPing for me will always be in third-person for action

basically, you are absolutely free to follow your own kind of format, and are not obligated to follow the length/format that I use so long as I have something to work with!

Getting referenced/mentioned/involved in other RP threads (IT’D BE AN HONOR.)

muses that I refer to for specific circumstances (i.e. events from a thread, sub-verses, etc.) will be @mentioned on my part.

‘Read-More’ Censorship – for SRP, spoiler content, extreme gore [on a (N)SFW labeled blog], & long posts

Aged-up versions of fictional characters who are originally/canonically no younger than 14 years old.

I am perfectly, absolutely aware of the fine lines over aging up fictional minors for smut content and will admit that I am perfectly fine/understanding towards RPing such things—so long as it applies to the 14+)—while also fully understanding the controversy it brings.

Aged-up characters or verses that I RP/provide are never intentionally or solely made for smut/SRP content, nor will they ever be.

There’s a good chance that any of my originally/canonically minor teenager whose blog is labeled 18+ may imply an aged-up verse for SRP content. Hopefully, this will help determine if you should be wary of these blogs of mine!

If all else fails, you are absolutely allowed to politely and respectfully ask if there is an aged-up verse with potential SRP content! This way, you can blacklist appropriately.

RP Blogs with smut content will always be labeled accordingly

Rule of Thumb on Age Gaps for Ships: no more than 2 years between minors with 18-year olds, and 3 years between muses aged 18-20 years old with 21+.

Even then, minor×adult SRP/smut is PROHIBITED.

Both muns must take/understand necessary precautions when involving aged-up fictional characters or minor muses, consider any adjustments that may be needed, and must be both adults (18+).

Of course, if you yourself actually condone pedophilia, I will block you.

This RPer is against/does not practice the following:

Godmodding Rude/Excessive reminders to reply to thread Complaints of unreplied/dropped threads

Engaging in SRP content with minors – will be blocked upon discovery

doesn’t include engaging in SFW content, but once you are blocked you’re unable to interact with me at all

I do not condone pedophilia and RP smut with RPers who are minors.

Reblog Karma – you are not obligated/required to send an ask in exchange for its respective inbox meme; feel free to reblog any memes from me!

If you, however, do practice reblog karma and I reblog without sending something in, though, please let me know!

Likewise, if you prefer people reblogging from the source and not you, please let me know if I ever do as such! I am a very forgetful bun.

Hate mail/anons in any shape or form (ie. suicide instigation, death threats, cyber-bullying)

Hate/‘Phobias’ towards any gender

Soft-blocks — you’re either permanently blocked or not, so be sure to act accordingly.

If for any reason I have blocked you by mistake or under a misunderstanding, I will either unblock or consider unblocking.

Likewise, if you have soft-blocked me for any reason and I, for some reason, somehow, still get to you, you have every right to let me know that I’ve made you uncomfortable and request that I no longer interact with you! (And if it still persists because I can be one hell of a forgetful bun, do remember that you have the right to permanently block me, I understand!)

I’m honestly still trying to understand these soft-block mechanics, if I’m honest...

Racism, Discrimination, Witch Hunts/Call-Out posts — being actively involved in one will automatically be an unfollow & potential block from me.

Pressure regarding thread replies/involvement in drama/desired content

Mutuals-Only interactions

More often than not, my RP blogs may be side-blogs to a main hub (especially if I’m RPing more than one muse in a fandom). Please be sure to check if they are! They’ll usually be mentioned in the descriptions of the blog.

If you are a mutuals-exclusive RPer, please let me know!

Outside Reblogs on RP Threads — Unless you are the RPer(s) involved, DO NOT REBLOG the thread.

Liking & commenting the post is okay for me. HOWEVER, please also respect what rules & policies the other RPer(s) may have! They have the right to react accordingly on their part.

This RPer has the rights towards the following:

Not expanding on ask-response replies

Refusing to start/continue a thread for any particular reason

Dropping a thread for any particular reason (especially when it feels that there isn’t much to continue on in it)

Giving more attention to some threads than others

Being finicky between doing legitimate RP threads vs. casually being IC

Being finicky with social interactions between individuals

Not becoming mutuals

Other Universal Standards & Guidelines

Dash Organization > Mutuals-Exclusive Practices

Follows & Mutuals =/= Interaction Privileges --- for me, follows are a means of controlling the content on my dash, not an indication of whether or not I want us to interact!

Depending on the blog’s popularity, RP blogs may or may not be fandom-restricted (interactions exclusive to canon/-versed/-oriented muses/OCs), unless exceptions for particular individuals are granted.

Multi-Muse Blogs are less likely to be followed (which might also be highly dependent on blog’s popularity) for dash content organization, especially if the muses extend across multiple fandoms.

Interactions > Reading Rules/Following when it comes to receiving a follow from me as it again depends on how often we interact.

Individual RP Blogs can and will have their own, more specific guidelines to follow depending on its fandom/popularity!

Policies can usually be found at the top of the blog’s description, listing what the blog consists of and what content is followed/allowed/restricted.

These policies can and will overrule respective universal policies here.

RP & Liked Content =/= Morals & What I Condone

Likewise, even if there are ships/morals/opinions that do not match with mine, it’s just as the saying goes: to each their own. So long as conflicts do not rise, we can still interact! People can like different things and still be nice to each other. God, I can’t stress this enough.

“I ﬁnd that, for me, the work is a safe place to put all the stuff you don't want to put in your real life. I don't want to be a crazy, manic asshole. I don't want to have an affair. I don't want to have a fucking gunﬁght. But! There's a part of your brain that wants to experience everything, and so work's a safe place to explore it all. Both in the writing and in the performing. I get to write about an affair. I get to have the guilt and the feeling of that without having to fuck my life up. [laughs] Art is the place to safely explore all those other sides of you, because the side you want to bring home is the side that wants to be a good father and be a good husband and be a good son. In art we can be fucking nuts.” -- Lin-Manuel Miranda [ x ]

Muse =/= Mun

Rule of Thumb: if the muse’s behavior is beginning to come on too strongly, chances are that I’m fully aware of this and will most likely show it via tags!

Tag Commentary — you are absolutely free to not provide OOC commentary in the tags, especially if you are an IC blog. This just helps show who I am as a mun!

Level of Investment = Thread Priorities & Muse Activity

I, unfortunately, am inspirationally-driven when it comes to my musings, and can therefore be selective with my activity or drop threads I’m unable to continue having a musing for. However, this does not mean I have anything against you, it’s just how my fuel for RPing works.

Still, I do my best to answer all my threads, so please be patient and understanding with me! Thanks!

By default, I will always assume that threads with me are the lowest priority and can/will eventually be dropped at any time by you.

All in all, so long as we keep to our own lanes instead of actively pursuing the other on behalf of our differences in beliefs, there shouldn’t be any problems. RPing is meant to be a fun, creative and laid-back FICTIONAL environment that is meant to be kept separately from reality.

Regarding Asks & IMs

IC & OOC Asks outside of inbox memes are allowed!

If sent anonymously for side-blog reasons, tag your blog and it will be re-tagged for notification purposes!

ex: ((@nameofrpsidebloghere))

If responding to an ask-response, please post it in a new text post by tagging the blog name and adding a link to the ask-response!

ask-response posts and even photo posts clutter the dashboard and ruin RP consistency...!

You are free to IM me for plots and reply reminders! (I’m a really lenient, GWF/go-with-flow RPer)

Please note, however, that if I feel the thread isn’t really going anywhere, no longer following a sort of plot, and/or isn’t keeping my interest, I eventually assume that it’s drop-able and will drop it myself.

Universal Tags for Inbox Memes & Themed Starters

For IC

Ask/M!A/RP asks --- #askmarp memes || #askmarp response

Ask/Inbox Memes --- #inbox memes || #inbox response

Themed Starter Memes --- #starter memes || #starter response

Drabble Memes --- #drabble memes || #drabble response

For OOC aka the Mun

Ask/Inbox Memes --- #mun inbox memes || #mun inbox response

Themed Starter Memes --- #mun starter memes || #mun starter response

For NSFW Content

Ask/M!A/RP asks --- #nsfw askmarp memes || #nsfw askmarp response

Ask/Inbox Memes --- #nsfw inbox memes || #nsfw inbox response

Themed Starter Memes --- #nsfw starter memes || #nsfw starter response

For a Faster Inbox Response – include corresponding rp/ask meme post!

ex: [Name of Meme Here!:] ♡ - symbol description here!

If even after reading the standards you still aren’t certain how RPing with me is like, you can also refer to these universal tags:

#rp guidelines - guidelines I follow as an RPer

#chill rp blog is chill - worrisome topics I’m okay with as an RPer

That aside, when in doubt, just ask! I’m totally cool with it, and always want to make sure the both of us are having a fun, comfortable time RP/interacting IC with each other! Do also remember that you are always, always able to just unfollow me, even softblock me if you have to (though I’d appreciate a direct notification/explanation for the first time I address the softblock if that ever occurs...!).

Were you able to read the whole thing?

Feel free to let me know by sending ‘whispers among psithurism’ in the ask (you aren’t required to, though)! Thanks for taking time to read this! Happy RPing!

#rules #blog info #info #i #rule #rp standards #rp rules #rp standards & rules #r #LABEL ;; important

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tony-starkrogers · 5 years

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The Massive SteveTony Rec List

Welcome to my Fairly Comprehensive, Ridiculously Long SteveTony Fic Recs, aka my collection of pretty much nearly everything I’ve read and loved so far over the years. This fandom is lucky enough to have some truly brilliant and dedicated authors, and I’m always discovering new fics to love, so I thought I’d share some of them with you! Fics will be sorted alphabetically tbh just because I suck at sorting stuff? Some of my personal forever-faves will be marked with ♡. This is by no means all of the fics this fandom has to offer, but if you’re new to the fandom, this should give you a good place to start, and if you’ve been a SteveTony shipper for a while, hopefully you’ll find something new! And if you do have a favorite fic that’s not on the list, please add it to the comments or rec it to me (because who doesn’t need more fics)!

Here’s just a few GREAT resources to check out if you’re looking for Even More fic recs:

@sabrecmcstonyficrecs - I mean, sabre is basically THE fandom resource? Any and all fic you’re looking for you’ll likely find here. ||| @findingstony - if you’re looking for a particular fic and don’t remember where you found it, look here first! ||| @cap-ironman - the place to go, especially for brand new fics! the fandom lives here ||| @nasaficsrecs - many good fic recs ||| @ishipallthings many wonderful rec lists ||| @sineala - the place to go if you are at all interested in 616 SteveTony or really anything in the 616 comics universe

I have lots of fics bookmarked on ao3: my bookmarks! You can also check out my other fic rec lists, and my general fic rec tag. Also while you’re at it maybe check out some of my fics?

And here are the recs! (under the cut.) Have fun reading and be sure to show your authors some love with kudos and comments!!!

♡ 1796 Broadway by rainproof, teaberryblue - M | 460,220 words

Captain America respectfully requests that all complaints be addressed to him in writing. On paper, the nice old-fashioned way, because the computer screen hurts his eyes.

Put your phone down, Tony.

absence makes the heart by fantalaimon - G | 4,835 words

“One night,” Tony says, and just flies himself bodily into one of the canary yellow beekeepers like a red and gold battering ram. “I ask for one measly night. One single goddamn night with my boyfriend—”

“Oh, is the boyfriend label on now?” Clint asks over the comms.

A Higher Form of War by sabrecmc - M | 292,114 words

Tony is a King with a surprising number of people out to kill him. Steve and the rest of the Avengers are fighting for Pierce's rebellion and end up with Tony as their prisoner. Oops.

A New Way For Us by ann2who - M | 24,435 words

They fight Thanos—and they’re losing. And before Tony knows what’s happening, he’s standing with Doctor Strange in front of the Eye of Agamotto and gets send back in time. Can he find a way to fix things this time around, or are they doomed to fall apart all over again?

♡ A Partial Dictionary Of The 21st Century By Captain Steve Rogers, US Army by copperbadge - E | 13,888 words

Steve is adapting well to the new millennium, and he has the dictionary to prove it.

age is an irrational number by valtyr - E | 8,749 words

Steve and Tony grow old together.

♡ All Roads Lead To by theappleppielifestyle - G | 13,155 words

After Obadiah's betrayal, Tony hides in the depths of the Midwest to become a mechanic.

The Avengers come into his life anyway.

All These Things I've Said by Amuly - M | 5,840 words

When Tony starts talking in a language Steve can't understand--the language of science--Steve figures he'll retaliate with a little foreign language knowledge of his own. Only once he starts speaking French around Tony, Steve finds that sometimes it's easier to say what he really wants to say to Tony in a language he can't understand.

Good thing Tony doesn't know French.

And The Void Would Be Calling. by jadedoll - E | 17,721 words

Tony could be suffering from amnesia, a hitch-hiker from a parallel dimension, a ghost or maybe a time-traveller. He's sure he could work out the answer if Steve would just stop pretending he was Tony's boyfriend.

♡ As Sharp As Any Thorn by RurouniHime - E | 47,027 words

It’s four days to Christmas, there’s a city in shambles, and the nation is in mourning because of the actions of a single man.

♡ Be No Stranger (All Your Saints and Soldiers Remix) by jibrailis - T | 5,973 words

That's the twenty-first century love song, baby. Glitz and glamour and every one of us is a liar.

Bizarre Love Triangle by panickyintheuk - T | 1,929 words

Once the idea was in his head, he’d started picking up on all kinds of things, like the way Stark talked about Iron Man with such affection, and seemed to share so many of his mannerisms, and was constantly working on ways of improving the suit. It was obvious.

Blank Slate - A Tony Stark Mystery by navaan - T | 25,381 words

He doesn’t remember who he is or who his friends are, but he knows he’s in a Nazi prison and needs to get away. He doesn’t remember anything about Captain America either, but the man seems to be the kind of guy you trust.And apparently they share more history than meets the eye at first glance.

♡ But Loving Him Is Red by theappleppielifestyle - Not Rated | 25,524 words

"It is- it is not just destined, Steve Rogers. It will reach through the decades, through entire universes if it has to. It will scour the galaxies without rest until the two of you are standing next to each other. Migardians- Migardians call them soulmates, I believe."

♡ Captain America, Undone by laireshi - M | 2,818 words

Steve thinks he can seduce Tony before Tony seduces him. He's very, very wrong.

♡ Captain !@#$*%& America by Wordsplat - T | 8,093 words

The first time Tony hears Steve swear, he's pretty sure it's a dream. The second time is a lot harder to dismiss, considering it's the middle of the afternoon and they're both clearly awake. After that, what else can Tony do but use science to get to the bottom of it?

Catching Lightning in a Bottle by sabrecmc - M | 120,650 words

College student Tony meets janitor Steve at MIT and they fall blissfully in love, until Howard happens and things fall apart. One divorce paperwork snafu courtesy of the ever-helpful Jarvis, and ten years later, Tony has to get re-divorced from Steve.

This does not go as he imagines.

♡ Cherry Ride by copperbadge - E | 12,318 words

A SHIELD agent named Roger Stevens told Tony that his nickname was "Cap". Tony didn't connect the dots until it was much, much too late.

♡ Counterpart by sara_holmes - M | 217,400 words

coun•ter•part [koun-ter-pahrt] [noun] 1. a person or thing closely resembling another, especially in function. 2. a copy; duplicate. 3. one of two parts that fit, complete, or complement one another.

Just because Hydra used the DNA of a Captain America from another dimension to create a lab-grown, six-year-old super-soldier, it doesn't mean that said six-year old super-soldier is biologically Steve's, right?

(Where Steve wants to ban Clint from bringing things home from alternative dimensions, until he doesn't.)

Dangerous Kitchen Tools by ladyshadowdrake - E | 18,330 words

Engineering prodigy, billionaire, and heir to the Stark Industries empire, Tony Stark turned the business world on its head by opening a restuarant and burying himself in the kitchen. Years later, he covers an informal evening cooking class for his friend and fellow molecular gastronomist, Bruce Banner, where he meets famously camera-shy comic artist Steve Rogers.

♡ Dazed and Confused by tsukinofaerii - M | 4,160 words

Captain America has a great many duties that need careful attention. He has to... uh... That thing where... Wow, Tony's pants are awfully tight, aren't they?

Dear Tony, by sirona - T | 5,925 words

Once the dust after what no one is referring to as "The Break-up" has settled, Steve starts writing and doesn't seem to know how to stop.

"death by coffee" and other search queries by goodmorningbeloved - T | 2,841 words

In which Steve's feelings are hopelessly obvious through his Google searches. JARVIS decides to step in.

Deep in the Heart of Me by Finely Honed (jaqen_hgar) - E | 255,926 words

There were days when the realization that he was someone’s father made Steve's head hurt, but mostly he was grateful that he could trust his instincts, because apparently Peter was what had been missing from his life. Yes, he still had lingering, unresolved issues from his time in the Army, and sure, he had what Bucky annoyingly referred to as a criminally untapped ass, and no life outside of work and Peter, but Steve was okay with how his life had turned out because of trusting his instincts.

Unfortunately, those same instincts had straight up betrayed him by going absolutely haywire upon being exposed to Tony Stark.

Do It Over by Sineala - T | 1,999 words

The last words your soulmate says to you are written on your skin, and you won't know who they are until they die. The thing is, Steve and Tony die a lot.

♡ don't know why it took me so long to see by goodmorningbeloved - M | 11,209 words

“Oh, watch this,” Natasha says, propping her chin against her knuckles and turning a sweet gaze on him. “Tony, what’s it like dating a superhero?”Tony bristles in irritation. “We’re not dating,” he snaps. “Captain America probably thinks he can get into anyone’s pants just ‘cause he’s got a mask, costume, and reputation, but not me, buddy. That shield? Gotta be overcompensating for something.” He adds, a bit petulantly, “Oh, and all that blue? Definitely more Steve’s color than his.”-

In which Tony is a genius in all matters except recognizing his boyfriend past a mask.

♡ Emanata (The Comics Will Break Your Heart Remix) by teaberryblue - T | 29,720 words

Steve Rogers has the opportunity to fulfill his childhood dreams of becoming a comic artist when eccentric billionaire, superhero patron, and obsessive comic enthusiast Tony Stark offers him a job drawing Iron Man.

But Tony Stark has no idea that Steve Rogers is really Captain America, the newest member of the Avengers.

And Iron Man has no idea that Captain America is really Steve Rogers, up-and-coming comic book artist.

And Steve doesn't know what to do about the fact that he's falling head over heels for them both.

♡ Engaging the Enemy by tsukinofaerii - T | 22,823 words

Iron Man is one of the more persistent villains that the Ultimates face, with a special fondness for one Captain America. As Steve starts to findout more and more about him, the lines between hero and villain begin to blur. Sometimes, you don't have to be on the right side of the law to be in the right.

even if the brain has forgotten, perhaps the teeth remember (or the fingers) by theappleppielifestyle - G | 8,906 words

Tony gets temporary amnesia.

Some things are clearer without his preconceptions dragging him down.

♡ Even My Phone Misses Your Call by rainbowninja167 - E | 10,869 words

Steve makes it all the way to Ohio before conceding that the post-Chitauri road trip might’ve been a mistake.

Or, ten times Steve has to call Tony to come pick him up.

Even Tony Can't Resist Puppy Love by Wordsplat - T | 7,766 words

In which there is a dinner bet, a com line confession, and, as usual, Loki's magical hijinks make Tony's life unnecessarily difficult.

Fairy Godmother by Amuly - T | 5,186 words

Auntie Peggy has been telling Tony stories about Captain America his whole life. Only problem is, the real thing just about measures up to the stories. Which means, of course, that Aunt Peg has to go to work, because an Aunt's work is never done.

Favorable Winds by RurouniHime - T | 2,056 words

Steve’s voice comes from behind, a sigh and a thump as his own pack hits the floor. “Sam. Meet Tony Stark.”

Follow in Your Footsteps by Sineala - T | 6,788 words

When Tony is twelve, his soulmate's name appears on his wrist. Unfortunately, it's hard to find out anything at all about Steve Rogers.

It turns out there's a reason for that.

Formerly by laireshi - T | 13,620 words

A week ago, he touched Steve at night. A week ago, he kissed him. A week ago, Steve kissed him back.

(A week ago Steve was dead, and Tony deleted his brain.)

The Foodieverse (series) by copperbadge, scifigrl47 - works G-T | 130,326 words in series

It's an AU where everyone works in the food industry. That makes total sense and is definitely not wildly irrational on any axis.

♡ Get Some Now by Sineala - T | 10,376 words

Avengers Mansion has a mysterious feline infestation. Meanwhile, Steve just can't figure out how to ask Tony out on a date. And the thirteen teleporting cats sure aren't helping matters any.

♡ Going on a Ride (series) by theappleppielifestyle - Not Rated | 14,306 words in series

"You want to take me for a ride on your motorcycle," Tony repeats, slow so he can process it as he’s saying it, "because you think my glasses are cute."

Hashtag Finally by Wordsplat - T | 15,208 words

Tony doesn't ever actually ask the Avengers to move into his house, steal his wifi, eat all his food, and become the best family he's ever known. They do it anyway.

How To Be a Truly Terrible Wingman by Wordsplat - M | 11,721 words

Prompt: "We were both playing wingman for our friends who have now decided to go home together, and after five minutes of conversation we fucking hate each other. Let’s bang it out."

♡ How To Excel At Supervillainy (and lose your heart to America) by Zekkass - E | 13,531 words

And that's how Tony's supervillainy hobby got way way way complicated.

♡ How to Lose a Super Soldier in One Easy Step by and_backagain, jibrailis - E | 18,248 words

Rogers jerks backwards, shock registering on his face, and Tony thinks, welcome back to the land of the living, Cap, looks like you're sticking around.

Or, a Pushing Daisies AU.

♡ I (created from fantasies) exist solely for you by Mizzy - T | 62,917 words

Six years ago, without the Avengers Initiative there to save the day, scientist Dr. Eric Selvig sacrificed himself to save the world, the almighty demi-god Thor was lost to a terrible storm, and vigilante Iron Man – spotted with a nuclear weapon trying to take advantage of the situation – was forever labelled an enemy of SHIELD.

This is a comic book office AU, where Steve is defrosted a year too late, Thor has forgotten who he is, and no one knows Tony is Iron Man. Also includes: office pranks, inappropriate post-it notes, and superheroes who like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain

Indecent Proposal by gyzym, Siria - T | 2,592 words

On the plus side, marriage is bound to be easier than proposing.

i stole the keys to this guy by kellifer_fic - M | 6,007 words

Where it was Nick Fury's idea, but he didn't mean it like that

♡ In Which Tony Stark Builds Himself Some Friends (But His Family Was Assigned by Nick Fury) (series) by scifigrl47 - works rated T-M | 343,010 words

Steve takes things like personal responsibility and respect seriously. Tony's got people he pays to take care of that kind of thing, and anyway, he's pretty sure that he's going to die of some exotic disease in his workshop, because Dummy's still a little spotty about what is 'clean' enough to put on an open wound. The rest of the Avengers are in this for personal gain, except for Clint, he just enjoys being a dick.

And some things shouldn't be a chore.

♡ i will never stop losing my breath (every time i see you looking back at me) by theappleppielifestyle - G | 3,222 words

In all fairness, Tony is on autopilot when this happens. He’s had a long, hard day, and it’s possible he hasn’t slept in several long, hard days. He’s already half-asleep on the couch and he’s relaxed and happy, which is a rarity on its’ own, and he’s comfortable enough to let his guard down and get his body to do all the work without switching his brain on.

That should’ve been enough of a warning sign, but apparently not: Tony stretches, says goodnight to his teammates and gets varied responses back, and then he kisses Steve.

He only realizes what he’s done after he’s started to lean back, opening his eyes to see Steve’s blown wide, staring at Tony with his lips gone slack and a tiny furrow between his eyebrows.

if they be worthy by theappleppielifestyle - Not Rated | 824 words

Everyone's staring, and Tony isn't awake enough to do anything but gape dumbly at the hammer in his hand."Huh," he says."Seconded," Steve says through his toast. "Tasha, go tell Coulson another one of us can pick it up."

♡ Last Train Home by erde - T | 10,983 words

Steve writes letters to Tony that he never sends. By the time he hands them to their rightful owner, Tony has had a brush with death, has retired as a superhero, and now has a small town workshop of his very own. But it's okay, Steve has gone into retirement too.

Like Gene Kelly in the Movies by lyra_wing - M | 11,449 words

Everything Tony Stark does is a dance. And it's super confusing for Steve.

Like Sunlight by sara_holmes - M | 8,309 words

Steve is used to the way it feels by now; a strange but gentle tugging connection under his sternum, warm tingles in his skin whenever they touch. That is, until Tony gets himself kidnapped. Then it kinda feels more like someone is trying to wrench his heart out through his ribcage.

Looking for Heaven by foxxcub - E | 31,950 words

When young Lord Anthony Stark learns Steven Rogers has enlisted in the army, he thinks he's seen the last of his tiny, headstrong, haughty stable boy. But four years later, Lord Stark gets an unexpected visit from Steve, whose mother has fallen gravely ill and into financial ruin. Even more unexpected, Steve agrees to a shocking proposal: they will marry, giving Steve the necessary funds to save his mother, and Tony the much-needed reprieve from harassing would-be suitors. It is a business arrangement, nothing more. But as time goes on and circumstances arise, Tony begins to learn that keeping his heart away from his husband is easier said than done.

♡ Love in a Time of Amnesia by Amuly - T | 6,241 words

Carol might have lost all her memories of her friends, but there's at least one thing she can know with absolute certainty: Steve and Tony are a couple. And if the rest of the Avengers insist on saying they're not, well: Carol will just have to put her amnesia to use, for the greater good.

♡ L☆VE by copperbadge - M | 3,773 words

Steve's favorite shirt is at the center of a debate about masculinity, sexuality, and whether or not he did in fact steal it like a thief in the night from Tony.

♡ Meet Your Heroes by Wordsplat - M | 4,130 words

Tony gets rescued by a highly concerned, very handsy Captain America. This is confusing for a number of reasons.

Momentary Paws (or, DO NOT WANT) by velithya - T | 16,834 words

WTF KITTEN

♡ Mr. July by jibrailis - E | 10,065 words

Tony is the only one who can defend Steve's virtue. Tony hates his life.

♡ Neanderthals In Tights (Also Known As a Football Game) by Wordsplat - T | 3,228 words

In which Tony supports Steve at his first big football game, with guest appearances by an exasperated Pepper and an embarrassed Bruce, because yeah, okay, maybe Tony's not really one hundred percent clear on the rules of this game. Why, exactly, are a bunch of neanderthals tackling his boyfriend again?

one hundred percent skill, fifty percent luck by kellifer_fic - T | 7,418 words

Where there is a poker game, a v-card and general misunderstandings

Orbiter Dictum by schmevil - T | 7,357 words

Steve is at the sink, washing the few dishes that pizza for two generates, when he realizes that Tony is in love with him.

Our Weight In Gold by ann2who - E | 33,607 words

It was every cliché he’d ever heard about. Every sappy thing they wrote down in the magazines, every single thing he had always hated about the myth. It was as though he had experienced life without sight, and was suddenly bombarded by a storm of color. It was all-consuming, and rushing through his veins like molten lava, like his whole existence was suddenly filled with sunlight. A door opened, and a myriad of emotions stormed through his body: confusion, disbelief, loneliness, and so much fierce determination that it almost knocked Tony off his feet. And he understood then, understood that these emotions weren’t his. They were Rogers’.

This is a story about fate, self-doubt, choice and eventually—love.

Over Sea, Under Stars by vorkosigan - T | 36,651 words

Tony gets the phone, but he never uses it and he never intends to. Or, he doesn’t until Steve starts texting him, asking strange questions about medication and mental health, which is when Tony gets worried.

♡ Phil Coulson's Case Files of the Toasterverse - works rated mostly G-T, | 287,890 words in series

Short stories from the Toasterverse

Place Your Bets by RurouniHime - M | 35,999 words

Steve Rogers may or may not have just picked up a prostitute. This may or may not be Tony Stark’s fault.

♡ Pulse, Beat, and Measure (series) by Sineala - E | 134,095 words in series

Two men. Two worlds. Life during wartime.

Ready, Fire, Aim (series) by gyzym - M | 63,019 words in series

There's no "I" in "Avenger."

♡ Relativistic Heat Conduction (series) by BlossomsintheMist - E | 70,484 words in series

Age of Ultron-based, but not entirely canon compliant. Written for the 2013 Cap-Iron Man Reverse Big Bang. Ultron has attacked, obliterating most of the world's superheroes and resistance in a matter of hours. The remaining heroes band together and share what strength they have to get through it, to survive, and defeat Ultron once and for all. Steve Rogers grieves in the wake of the disaster and the heroes' defeat, and no one knows if he will be able to provide the leadership they need--but Tony Stark isn't about to let him slip away that easily.

♡ Rom-Commed By Fate (Or JARVIS) by leashy_bebes - E | 14,387 words

The best thing about being an Artificial Intelligence is the ability to parse, filter and modify the things people say until you've got the cause to do exactly what you wanted in the first place. Or, in which JARVIS cock blocks Tony into having an actual relationship.

♡ Run Program: {x} by Amuly - M | 19,728 words

Taking care of Tony is a lot of work. Especially when you’ve only got one arm. And your code dates back to the 1980s.

♡ Secrets of a Successful Marriage by valtyr - E | 24,118 words

Tony Stark lives a double life; he's secretly the supervillain known as Iron Man. But his loving husband Steve has a few secrets of his own, as Tony is about to discover.

♡ SexyMechanic70 by Potrix - T | 2,449 words

“SexyMechanic70,” Natasha reads aloud, nodding approvingly.“Sounds promising,” Clint offers.“And look,” Bucky adds, “he didn’t even send a dick pic! And he praised your sketch which, by the way, is a totally lame icon choice.”Steve snatches his phone back, batting Bucky’s hands away when he struggles to reach for it again. “Cut it out,” he grouses. “Also, excuse me for not posting a picture of my abs.”“A true tragedy,” Sam sighs, earning himself an indignant squawk from Bucky and a betrayed look from Steve. “What? I’m just saying. They’re great abs.”“True,” Nat hums and bumps the fist Clint is holding out to her.

♡ Sixpence In His Shoe by scifigrl47 - M | 103,682 words

Steve and Tony should really read the fine print on what they're signing. Then again, some mistakes are not really mistakes.

♡ Soul Bomb by copperbadge - T | 1,944 words

Suddenly everyone in Manhattan has someone else's voice in their head. Tony got Steve's, for his sins.

♡ Stand Back, I'm Going To Try Science by Good_News_Everyone - T | 2,123 words

Soulmates are a rare and cherished thing, a simple touch of hands bringing love that lasts forever. By all the rules of romance, they're meant to wait for each other and to trust in the vagaries of fate to bring them together. Tony's never been good at waiting, and when he has science on his side, who needs fate?

♡ Start as You Mean to Go On by BlackEyedGirl - E | 2,612 words

Tony gets that the others think this is an ego thing - the way he can’t resist pushing Steve’s buttons. Honest-to-God, the guy just bugs him. Mostly because Steve is distractingly perfect, but a little bit because of the family history.

♡ Steve Rogers Is (Not) A Morning Person by theappleppielifestyle - Not Rated | 1,161 words

Dream, Steve decides. With that comforting knowledge, Steve takes Tony's face in his hands and kisses him.

(Spoilers: it isn't a dream.)

Steve Rogers Takes Offense and the World Gets Schooled by RurouniHime - T | 2,463 words

In which Steve has no idea how that got up on BuzzFeed (aka, because some people don't respond to anything but the direct approach.)

♡ Syzygy (a Kludged Together remix) by Mizzy - T | 20,198 words

When Tony Stark cut Steve Rogers' morning jog short to join him on a reconnaissance mission off the East Coast, Tony sure wasn’t expecting to end up stuck on a life raft in the middle of the ocean, Steve's hand knuckle-deep in his chest.

♡ Tales of the Bots by scifigrl47 (series) - most works rated M | 523,654 words

When Tony Stark was seventeen years old, he built his first AI. On that day, he ceased to be his father's creation, and became a creating force in his own right.

That one act likely saved his life, and not always in the most obvious ways.

The Best Policy by cylobaby27 - M | 22,724 words

Tony Stark breezes through life on bluster and bullshit. When he gets hit by a truth spell, he locks himself away in his workshop so he can find a way to reverse it without anyone finding out. So why can't he say no when Steve keeps asking to spend time with him?

♡ the family you choose by theappleppielifestyle - Not Rated | 7,385 words

“Just who exactly was my son making out with in a closet?”

“Tony Stark.”Huh.“You might know him,” Fury continues, and Sarah nods, furiously biting at her cheek so she doesn’t do something awful, like giggle.

♡ The Forever-Nighter by Wordsplat - T | 10,172 words

When Rhodey decides that Tony's been slacking lately and drags him along to the gym, Tony's fully prepared to duck right back out the door the first time Rhodey turns around. Then he sees Hot Blond Guy.

♡ The Last Love Song of Anthony E. Stark by jibrailis - M | 42,327 words

After contracting an Asgardian virus, Tony starts forgetting things. And people. And Steve.

♡ The Opposite of a Problem by Sineala - T | 2,490 words

"I promise to love, honor, and probably not obey you, and, uh, take you as my totally-unlawfully-wedded husband, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, until death do us part, or for at least the next seventy-two hours."

(Or: Tony and Steve get fake-married for the sake of the mission.)

♡ The Tchotchke Cha Cha by Arukou - T | 7,269 words

What started off as one impulse buy souvenir snowballs into a constant flow of knickknacks from all over the world, and Steve is starting to wonder if it's more than just Tony being nice.

♡ The Twice-Told Tale by arysteia - E | 15,789 words

For someone he'd hero-worshipped for so long, Steve Rogers in the flesh is a pretty big disappointment. For one thing, he keeps looking at Tony as though he reminds him of someone else, and even if he never says anything, Tony's pretty sure it's his father. A lifetime of not measuring up to Howard's expectations is more than enough, thank you very much, and he's certainly not going to make an effort to live up to any of Steve's. Steve's pretty clearly failed to live up to his expectations, in any case, and that's not hypocritical at all.

Think of This as Solving Problems (That Should Never Have Occurred) by Sineala - T | 35,216 words

No one knows Tony is Iron Man. Then Tony gets amnesia, and literally no one knows Tony is Iron Man.

♡ Toasted Buns by copperbadge, scifigrl47 - E | 47,044 words

After seeing Tony naked and tanned -- all over -- in a decontamination shower, Steve realizes he may be in trouble. Tony, meanwhile, is definitely in trouble over those tabloid pictures of him sunbathing nude. The solution is clearly a tropical island getaway.

♡ Tony Stark Falls In Love With A Cat by shellhead - M | 6,887 words

When Steve goes missing, Tony ends up finding him at an animal shelter. Volunteering.

♡ Tony Stark and the Super Sleeper, or actually, Soldier by RurouniHime - T | 8,571 words

The one where Steve keeps falling asleep on Tony.

♡ Tony Stark Takes a Liberty and the Universe Thanks Him by RurouniHime - T | 1,512 words

In which people think they are entitled to Steve Roger's face (aka, because tomorrow is coming, and I hold out hope, Supreme Court.)

♡ Toy Soldiers by copperbadge - E | 44,241

When Steve Rogers, five foot four and a hundred and ten pounds, met Tony Stark in a bar, he didn't expect it to lead to a relationship. Or that Tony would find out he's not an art student during a SHIELD rescue mission in Afghanistan.

♡ Truth by valtyr - E | 2,677 words

Captain America takes truth serum. Tony is all over that.

♡ Two Out of Three (Ain't Bad) by plingo_kat - T | 9,449 words

It blindsides him one morning in the middle of his customary third cup of coffee; Steve walks through the door in loose cotton pants, shirt pulled up to wipe the sweat off his face from his usual morning workout, and Tony thinks: adorable.

♡ Unveil My Unsightly Heart by Mizzy - M | 43,019 words

Looking over an old prototype helicarrier for its future viability as a base for the Avengers should have just been a routine day full of bickering and non-adventure for Steve Rogers and Tony Stark.

But when they're catapulted into an alternate universe – where their alternate selves are married and battling with a mysterious threat – the two are forced to get over their differences in order to figure out what's going on, before it's too late.

Because there's more going on than meets the eye, and Steve and Tony falling in love might just be the most dangerous thing that can happen. Not just for one universe, but for all of them…

Wait & Sea by Lenalena - E | 53,244 words

In which Tony and Steve get sent on an undercover mission aboard a cruise ship to make contact with Hydra. In this AU the military has kept the discovery and defrosting of Captain America a secret, so Steve and Tony have never met before. Yet they are to pose as newlyweds....

Wash It All Away by ann2who - E | 8,634 words

Steve hummed, looking up at him. “All right. Strip.” Tony blinked at him. “Excuse me?” “Can’t very well wash your clothes while you wear ‘em,” he said and held out a hand expectantly.

What You Don't Know by Sineala - E | 9,808 words

In 1941, two strangers meet in a bar. And then Captain America meets Iron Man. And then Steve Rogers meets Tony Stark. They get it right. Eventually. And also they fall out of an airplane.

♡ when i run out of road, you bring me home by quidhitch - M | 18,466 words

“Oh, I won’t bother you.” The tone of Steve’s voice implies that he definitely will be bothering Tony, aggressively and frequently. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll keep to my farm, you keep to yours. Solitude together.”

Tony opens his mouth to argue that that’s not how this works, but he snaps it shut at the realization that Steven Grant Rogers is fucking with him. That twinkle in his eye has accelerated into a full-on glimmer, and the ends of his lips are twitching. Jesus, he hates this man. Or maybe he wishes he did. Tony can’t really tell the difference anymore.

♡ When I think about you by sirona - E | 11,955

Five times someone saw Steve sass the hell out of Tony and one time Tony finally bought a clue. Also known as the story of Captain Sasspants more than handling his own with Tony Stark at his most devious.

♡ When I Think (Oh, it Terrifies Me) by celli - E | 8,641 words

Look, some mornings you wake up and little green men are invading New York City; some mornings you wake up and you can hear Captain America's voice in your head. Tony has been an Avenger long enough that he saves his freakout for important things.

♡ will we ever say the words we're feeling by theappleppielifestyle - Not Rated | 1,673 words

He breaks off then, the realization of what he’s just revealed finally hitting him, and he stops, and Tony’s still staring.

(Or, Steve and Tony argue and Steve lets something slip.)

♡ With Words Other Than These by RurouniHime - E | 14,690 words

The way Steve’s beating that bag, though—Tony traces the cadence as well as the lines of Steve’s body, and wonders if he might not need to know about the mission after all. There’s a lot of tension knotted in Steve’s shoulders, a frenzy to each punch. The precision lacks. Maybe Steve’s just getting started, and if that’s the case, Tony could be here a long, long while.

with you by laireshi - M | 3,108 words

Sometimes Steve gets overwhelmed by how much he loves Tony.

Your Name on Every Wall by Sineala - T | 17,863 words

The Time Gem throws Steve into the past rather than the future, and in doing so, it gives him the opportunity to undo his past mistakes. But when it turns out that all of his mistakes involve Tony Stark, Steve begins to wonder if he's ever going to be able to mend things between them.

---

Hey, the list did have to end at some point! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed these recs!

Tagging some people who might be interested:

@divine529, @sabrecmcstonyficrecs, @sineala, @ishipallthings, @itsallavengers, @nasafic, @estebanrxgers, @starksnstripes, @goodmorningbeloved, @goose-danvers

#stevetony #stony #stony fic rec #stevetony fic rec #stevetony rec list #stony rec list #superhusbands #my fic recs #fic rec

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xoruffitup · 5 years

Text

Burn This First Preview: 3/15 Show Report

OKAY it’s 3 AM and I’m writing this on my phone so the format might be weird, but I have SO MANY thoughts and feels from tonight I’ve got to let the tidal wave out!!

First off - Yes, he looked gorgeous at stage door and he was so kind trying to sign for everyone he could! (The line was longggg.) I GOT HIS AUTOGRAPH AND THANKED HIM FOR SUCH A MOVING PERFORMANCE AND HE SAID “OH THANK YOU VERY MUCH” AND LOOKED UP AT ME WITH HIS GORGEOUS EYES AND GORGEOUS FACE AND THERE IS A PIC OF THIS MOMENT THAT WILL FOREVER LIVE IN MY HEART:

This is my new OTP, folks: Adam/The back of my head!

I attempted to ask for a pic but was hesitant and security had already half pulled him away so he was like “I don’t know if I’ll have time” sounding so nervous about getting to the whole line. BABY <333

Aksjsknsm I can’t believe I was this close to him - It hasn’t fully set in and omg I better just keep writing before it does set in and I lose my shit completely!

Play Highlights! (This list is Plot-Spoiler free.)

Alas, sadly there is not that much nakedness. He takes his pants off in Act 1 but has underwear and a long shirt on. The BEST is when he comes on wearing one of Keri/Anna’s kimono-style purple silk robes in Act 2 - I nearly DIED and cannot believe I saw that with my own eyes!! When he first steps onstage the robe’s open and he’s only wearing underwear so you get a nice chest glimpse, but then he sadly ties it. (Then proceeds to hilariously struggle with getting one of his arms through the complicated sleeves.) Oh, and did I mention the robe was paired with knee-high socks?

Adam is HYSTERICAL. He doesn’t come on stage for about the first twenty minutes, but when he did, it took all of 5 minutes for the audience to be in the palm of his hand, laughing at every other word he said. His delivery of all of Pale’s curse-laden, barely-logical rants and complaints is just masterful in comedic timing and effect. He’s a literal hurricane when he enters the show, flooding the stage with this frenetic, chaotic energy so intense he’s practically vibrating. He keeps everything at break neck pace, through 0-100 highs and lows where he’s bitching about parking one second, then animal-wail crying the next.

His character’s not likeable. Really, this is a testament and praise to Adam’s acting. After his first couple minutes on stage, there were stretches when I literally forgot it was him. When I was so taken in and then repulsed by this character in turns, his acting prowess overcame even my instinct to love him and everything he does on sight. I’m about to get deeper into the weeds on his character in the next section, but suffice it to say Adam’s performance is stellar and completely, convincingly transformative.

How heated does it get? The only intimate scene that happens in front of the audience includes some slow kissing, a bit down Keri/Anna’s neck, and wandering hands. The rest is implied off stage.

The play is set in the 80s, so while Keri looks KILLER in every single outfit, Adam’s suits are all big and baggy as was the style then and they’re not exactly flattering. His costume look is just a bit weird, not nearly as smolderingly hot as how they styled him in the promo pics. But even with that said.... The scene where they’re both close on the couch, talking softly before kissing happens? I would have still gone for him too. ;_;

The rest of this report is going to dive into and attempt to untangle some of the deeper elements and themes of the play. Stop reading here if you’re avoiding spoilers!

To my perspective, this wasn’t really a play about a smoldering, ill-advised love affair. Yes, that’s the main event, but this play is about so much more.

Anna and Pale are star-crossed lovers. No, not in the Disney or destined interpretation - I mean the proper, tragic meaning. Whatever is between them should not exist. Whatever is between them threatens and harms them both. Whatever is between them is not long for this world, and doesn’t belong in it.

But why doesn’t it belong? Sure, there are the technical, superficial reasons: Anna has a boyfriend; Pale is married with kids (though technically separated); They are polar opposite people - Sharing no visible common interests and with temperaments that couldn’t be more opposite.

What is the one thing stronger than all of that, which first brings them together? Their grief; Their shared (yet deeply personal and divergently different) senses of grief; The solace and understanding they can only find for that grief with each other. The loss they’ve both experienced is life-changing, and has no place to fit into or even exist at all in their normal lives.

And so, they hurtle into an affair that also has no place existing in their normal lives. By the end of the play, they both assert “I don’t want this.” To a certain degree, it’s the truth. It’s unlikely either of them would have willfully chosen to pursue the other, had they met under different circumstances. They would likely never have opened or even tapped at the floodgates of their attraction, unless they had both gravitated towards this dark, abnormal part of life outside the realm of everyday lives, jobs, rational behavior, and decisions.

To me, this play was really about confronting that abnormal, primal, and sometimes unfathomable level of being that exists below the everyday. Pale has a memorable remark about all the little lies people live with and show to the world each day. Sometimes - when it is cut open and its value or sense thrown into question by some great tragedy such as a loss like this - you lose touch with that everyday life and the person you think you are within that everyday world. It becomes painfully juxtaposed and shrunk tiny, in the face of something all-encompassing and all-powerful, like grief. It becomes exposed as paper thin; Everything within it questionable and perhaps useless.

There is something of the profound in an emotion like grief. When it’s shared with someone, it’s no wonder that that also unlocks some profound connection. Anna and Pale don’t like each other as people, and they certainly take no enjoyment in the grief that brought them together. Yet, the relationship that blooms from it contains a compulsion and truth neither of them can deny. Even though they “don’t want this” (the rational, everyday side of their minds talking), they both admit they’ve never felt anything like it before, and they keep finding themselves drawn together. They don’t want to want each other - It’s painful and frightening for both of them, and yet their attraction wraps them both just as completely as their grief.

Anna’s boyfriend Burton is the epitome of the everyday. He earns a lot of money, he’s a well-dressed gentleman. He’s a writer, and fancies he can capture and portray the entire spectrum of human emotion. Even “great love,” as he fumblingly attempts to describe towards the play’s beginning. Yet all his talk is vapid and empty; As is his relationship with Anna. Theirs is one of the everyday, rational variety. It belongs with the small lies we live with and put on and speak and perform each day - To keep our lives square and tidy and comprehensible.

Then - There’s the chaotic, unpredictable, bordering violent being of Pale. He is every sincere, larger-than-life emotion and base instinct most people tamp down and deny voice to. He represents the terrible, uncontrollable, threatening Truth of everyday masks, dark desires, and empty identities of performativity.

Their attraction is not something Anna can bear to look in the face. She throws Pale out and ends the relationship because that deeper truth of true emotion unlocked by her grief cannot coexist with her reality. Her ability to continue dancing, to continue the everyday life she’s trying so hard to believe in and trust the purpose of - It cannot contain Pale. He represents and unlocks profound, unknown feeling that casts the waking world as a shadow.

And yet for all that discomfort, she has an artistic breakthrough after the affair with Pale. She is inspired to finally choreograph Robbie’s final send-off piece. And with Anna, Pale unlocked a part of himself that was calm, gentle, and soothed - A version of himself totally incongruous with his own reality and the identity he wears. Both of them are changed through their journey together through the Profound. It is a deeply uncomfortable, destabilizing place that neither of them wish to remain in. And yet its power is undeniable; Its impact unforgettable. The very experience of it is something they seek comfort for and can only find from each other.

Is it better to tell little lies each day so the world will make sense? So you can understand exactly who’s looking back at you in the mirror, and the quotidian will shade your perception of the invisible and unfathomable depths of human experience? So everything will remain neat and in control?

Or - Does it give meaning to abandon control? To surrender to grief and undesired passion, for the sake of a reality that is uncompromisingly, viscerally, heartbreakingly genuine? The harsh, infinite light all the rest of life seems to be constructed to blot from our eyes?

I really hope that as more people see the play, people will start posting their interpretations as well! I would love some good analysis dialogues! In the meantime, I will now slide right back into flaily, trash fangirl mode.... Thank you for reading all this, if you got this far! Go see this marvelous, haunting play if you’re able!!

All the love to my fangirl besties!!! @reylonly Thanks for making it an amazing night! :’)))

#Adam Driver #Burn This #Broadway #Keri Russell #driverdaily

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pass-the-bechdel · 5 years

Text

Marvel Cinematic Universe: Ant-Man (2015)

Does it pass the Bechdel Test?

Yes, once.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Four (22.22% of cast).

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Fourteen.

Positive Content Rating:

Three.

General Film Quality:

It’s delightful.

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) UNDER THE CUT:

Passing the Bechdel:

Maggie passes with Cassie as she puts her to bed.

Female characters:

Peggy Carter.

Hope Van Dyne.

Cassie.

Maggie.

Male characters:

Howard Stark.

Hank Pym.

Scott Lang.

Peachy.

Luis.

Dale.

Kurt.

Dave.

Darren Cross.

Frank.

Paxton.

Gale.

Mitchell Carson.

Sam Wilson.

OTHER NOTES:

Dave calls Scott a pussy, and Scott is not fussed at all about accepting the attempted insult.

Ah, the old ‘wish you’d call me dad’ cliche, the most worn-out lazy way to establish an antagonistic parent/child relationship.

“a sustainable environment of well-being”, what an excellent fascist euphemism.

Maggie is very reasonable with Scott about the conditions for seeing Cassie; it’s refreshing to not have this played as ‘harpy ex-wife refuses to let man see his child because she’s just the worst!’ Maggie has a child to look after - and has been doing so for years now while Scott was in jail - and she has every right to impose rules on how things proceed, Scott doesn’t get to just march in and have things his way ‘because she’s my daughter!’ Children are not possessions or status symbols, and this movie does a nice job of recognising that and having the adult characters recognise that and behave in reasonable and understanding ways for Cassie’s benefit rather than their own egos. Other films should take note. Also, real people.

“Yeah man, it killed DiCaprio.”

Turning lambs into goo is worse than kicking puppies. What a monster.

They do a pretty solid job with the reason for Hope not being allowed to don the suit instead. It has strong potential for seeming like flat-out sexism, the idea that a woman can’t get the job done (in universe) and that a female hero won’t sell (out universe), and while that may indeed still be the core reason, they still pull off the reasoning as if it’s genuine.

Pym’s excuse for why he never told Hope the truth about her mother’s death, on the other hand, is pretty fuckin’ weak. Tell people to stop pretending ‘I was trying to protect you’ is a reasonable explanation for lies. It’s super-high - easily Top 5 - on my list of Worst and Most Tedious Cliche Lines.

Kurt suggests that the suit is the work of gypsies and it’s...not the best line they could have picked. Something less racist instead, maybe? No?

Cross is really fixated on Pym as a father figure. It’s different. I like different.

“That’s a messed-up looking dog.”

Scott and Paxton making peace is so great. Paxton peeing in all the corners and Scott being all jealous and threatened by Paxton ‘usurping his place in the family’ would have been such a predictable cliche for them to use, and this very palatable mature adult behaviour is sooo much better. This is how you stop normalising petty possessive rivalries.

Luis is magical, and also, mad cultured. I love it, but I love even more that they don’t hang a lantern on it, they just let it be part of his character.

Ok, I confess, this is probably gonna be a weird sort of meandering review, because I’ve had this post sitting in my drafts for two months gathering dust while I deal with the mental and physical fatigue of the first trimester of a pregnancy (it’s FUN), and now the due date for this post (pun definitely intended) is right on the horizon, so...I’m just gonna get it done, and it’ll be whatever the heck it is in the end. This is not a complex film filled with deep nuance, it’s basically just an action-y heist movie with some hand-waved scifi on top. And there’s ants. It’s not a hard film to talk about, so you’ll excuse me if it doesn’t get my very best effort. I’m kinda busy growing a human over here.

I remember a lot of grumbling and even some outrage in fandom, back when this film was announced; a lot of people upset that the MCU was bringing in a comparatively little-known and perhaps little-loved superhero like Ant-Man when they still hadn’t bothered with a single female-led film yet, and various complaints about the problematic nature of the Ant-Man character from the comics (referring, I believe, to the Hank Pym version). And then, of course, there was the doubt about whether or not an Ant-Man story was just a fucking idiotic idea in the first place, what with the questionable application of science and the even more questionable appeal of a tiny little man running around playing with ants. Expectations were not high. And yet, Ant-Man pulls through, not just with a great fun romp, but with what I consider one of the more entertaining films the MCU has churned out to date.

I have made my fair share of sour comments about previous films in the MCU and their unimaginative paint-by-numbers plots, and so what I’d like to talk about with Ant-Man is how it manages to be such a success to me despite an essentially uncomplicated story that follows a predictable narrative arc the likes of which we’ve all seen a hundred times before. The basic tenets of a heist movie are all there; the basic tenets of a good vs evil story play straight, alongside a low-key but typical redemption plot, and some plight-of-the-regular-guy vs corporate greed and warmongering, and the leading man hooks up with the leading lady in the end and proves himself as a hero to his family and all that jazz. We know every one of these story and character beats. So. Why do they work?

Let me back this up a second to talk about a couple of major-league pet peeves of mine, the one a microcosmic version of the other: firstly, when people say ‘all Marvel films are basically the same’, and secondly, the Advanced Level Faux-Intellectual Douche version of that sentiment, when people declare that ‘there’s no such thing as originality anymore! There are only seven types of story in the world anyway! Everything is derivative!’ It’s an obnoxious absence of a viewpoint that betrays a lack of imagination and a use of such broad-strokes surface-level comprehension as to be essentially meaningless. Sure, if you break down story concepts to their most fundamental core drives, you can summarise their arcs in a relatively small number of ways, and familiarity with these core concepts can provide a degree of predictability in the way things play out. But that doesn’t mean that every single version of, say, the classic Hero’s Journey is the same damn story, and therefore a useless derivation from which no entertainment or message can be gleaned. If someone asks you to tell them the plot of a movie and you just go ‘oh, it’s a Hero’s Journey’ and leave it at that, you’ve told them almost nothing about what to actually expect. The Matrix is a very, very different Hero’s Journey to The Lord of the Rings, which is a very different Hero’s Journey to Finding Nemo, which is not at all the same as Iron Man. And which of them is closest to The Odyssey, anyway? One of the most obvious differences with all of those examples is genre, and the traditional trappings which often (but not always) follow from them. Sure, the MCU films tend to all fit superhero-comic genre conventions, and some of them (particularly origin stories, as with Iron Man and Thor) may employ a lot of the same tropes while they’re at it. But does anyone really, genuinely think that Ant-Man is ‘basically the same’ as Captain America: The First Avenger? Is Guardians of the Galaxy almost indistinguishable from Black Panther? Does anyone who says ‘Marvel movies are all basically the same’ actually believe the words out of their own mouth, or do they just hope it makes them sound smart if they imply that they’re ‘above’ enjoying mainstream popcorn action?

All of this is to say, what makes Ant-Man work where other trope-heavy films fall apart? The same thing that makes literally any story ever work, and be worthwhile, whether it ‘breaks barriers’ or ‘teaches something’ or is considered ‘high art’ or not: details. Some films are too light on details, which makes them boring because they never really bother to build anything on top of those core foundations we know so well. Sometimes, the details - numerous as they might be - are too generic to have an impact, and the dull result is the same. Sometimes the details are too absurd to land, or there are too many to keep track of, or they require too much extraneous qualification to fit into the flow of the rest of the story, or they’re irrelevant to the rest of the story anyway. The thing about details? There are countless options. People come up with new ideas all the time, through the exercise of imagination or through developments and innovations in the real world. Basic, core plot arcs may be distilled to a handful of options, but story details are limitless, and the possibility of fun new combinations is always there, whether you’re inventing something entirely never-before-seen or not. The idea that you have to be shocking and unexpected to be worthwhile is ridiculous, and shepherds illogical contrivances and gimmicks without narrative cohesion or purpose much more often than it achieves something genuinely surprising with merit (and storytelling that prioritises ‘shocking twists’ is usually so busy trying to look clever it forgets to actually be clever, but, that’s another conversation). The point is, Ant-Man being a delightful film isn’t rocket science. It’s as simple as just a little forethought in the construction of its details.

As noted back near the top, the whole Ant-Man concept and its wobbly science was something that drew some doubt regarding whether or not it could be pulled off in a convincing manner; the solution to achieving that is to do more than just lean in to the idea. The film throws itself whole-heartedly into its core conceit and its tropes, and it drags us along with it to gleefully delight in the act. The story is not embarrassed by itself, it doesn’t try to keep its distance; instead, it gives us a flying ant named Antony, and a dramatic death scene for that ant. What is the point of the Pym particle science conceit if we don’t enjoy the comedic potential of an epic battle inside a briefcase, or on a child’s train set? Relevant to this also is the subject of casting choices (as much a detail-of-interest as anything; a single casting choice can legitimately make or break a film). Paul Rudd has a perfect blend of leading-man charisma and affable comedic chops; he plays Scott as a beta-personality, which is always a refreshing change-up for a lead, and one which invites other refreshing changes around him. It avoids tedious masculine antics in his interactions with other men, while encouraging balanced and respectful interactions with women; Scott never asserts himself as the boss or leader in his relationship with Luis and the rest of his crew, allowing for a smoothly-cooperative dynamic; no time or plot is wasted on pointless jostling for control of the operation with Pym; the idea that Scott needs to prove himself to the three female characters in his life - Hope, Maggie, and Cassie, each for similar but different reasons - is given legitimate weight, instead of implying that Scott and his perspective is inherently superior and correct and the onus is on the other characters to realise that, rather than being on him to live up to other people’s reasonable expectations. It should come as no surprise that the latter element is especially interesting and heartening in the context of this blog.

This is particularly good news when it comes to the kinds of relatively minor details which can make a huge difference in whether or not one reflects on a film in a positive or negative manner; the fact that the narrative supports and validates Hope’s anger, her frustration and resentment and her all-business-no-fun attitude, is vital to keeping a viewer like myself on-side with the film. Hope is never presented as someone who should ‘just loosen up’, or ‘have faith in her father’s plan’, the fact that she is denied the Ant-Man technology because Pym ‘can’t bare to risk losing her’ is offered as a reason but not as an excuse for something deeply patronising, and Scott proving that he can get the job done despite Hope’s misgivings about him is not framed as her being ‘wrong’ - her concerns were legitimate, as all her emotions across the film are, and the story never compromises on that in order to bolster another character. Whether or not Hope is well-handled is not important to the operation of the central narrative plot in a technical sense, but it means a lot in terms of delivering strong characters with satisfying arcs, and a central plot can easily fall flat if the characters participating in it don’t work well, individually or together.

I’m trying to wrap this up coherently, but it’s just as well that I disclaimered myself in the beginning because all I’ve got are frayed pieces of, probably, five other paragraphs I could waffle about. It’s not a complex film, no, but it has a surprising amount of quality details, the more I think about it, even regarding aspects of the movie that I liked less than others (Pym, for example, I did not love, but I like that the movie never tried to pass off his ‘genius’ as an excuse for him being a significantly flawed figure in the lives of most people who encountered him, often with bitter consequences. I’m also a big fan of the fact that both he and Scott have complicated but loving relationships with their daughters, considering that Hollywood has a hyper-obsession with the idea of ‘A Man And His Son’ as the beating heart of family narratives). I’m going to close this out with what may be my personal favourite refreshing detail of this movie, and that’s the mature adult relationship between Scott, Maggie, and Paxton. I mentioned it already in the notes, but honestly, how many times have we seen that toxic cliche, with the shrewish ex-wife and the terrible new man in her life, where the main character (who is Doing His Best!) has to prove through [insert plot heroics] that ex-wife is WRONG and should have stayed with him, the father of her child(ren), because did we mention, her new man is terrible and the main character is always right and good and better! In the end, ex-wife almost certainly leaves her terrible new man to get back together with the main character, because he is Doing His Best and that’s more important than actually being a stable/responsible person! The American nuclear family is the ideal! Divorce is for heathens! Y’all know that toxic plot. I can think of three different examples of it in action right off the top of my head, with no effort required. Point is, the degree to which I was utterly thrilled by this movie subverting cliche at every turn of its family saga really cannot be overstated. Maggie is a reasonable person! Scott respects that Cassie’s needs are more important than his wants! Paxton cares about his family and genuinely wants Scott to land on his feet, for the benefit of everyone! There’s no jealous posturing and Scott acting all hurt about being ‘replaced’! HE LITERALLY THANKS PAXTON FOR EVERYTHING HE DOES, WHEN HAVE I EVER SEEN THAT BEFORE?! Honestly, you don’t have to tell the most original story in the world to tell a story that resonates. You don’t even have to avoid common tropes, you just have to think about what you want to do with them. It’s not rocket science. It’s just good honest storytelling.

With ants.

#Marvel Cinematic Universe #Ant-Man #MCU #Bechdel Test #female representation

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