#i love comics but hOO BOY DO THEY TAKE A WHILE TO MAKE

[bathomet-writes]

Could- 👉👈 could I perhaps ask for a rise Mikey x reader short, where like: it starts with a flashback of the boys as kids, going outside for the first time and while exploring, Mikey spots this little girl on the playground and just thinks she's the prettiest creature he's ever seen, so he goes to give her a flower, completely forgetting he's a mutant and like, readers scared at first but then sees the flower and is suddenly flattered

And then flashback ends: Mikey is now left hopelessly in love with reader, who the boys have now been friends with for a long time and reader is like well dam aware of mikeys crush, but decides to act like she doesn't know to see how long it'll take Mikey, but after a failed attempt of impressing reader by almost getting hurt, reader is just like 'fuck it' and makes the first move

If u don't wanna do it then just pretend u don't see this, and if ur interested, feel free to make any changes you'd like. Also pls do not feel rushed and have a good day.

candy hearts and paper flowers

relationship: Mikey x F!reader

warnings: romantic, fluff, humor, minor hurt/comfort, kissing, sfw

word count: 5,289

author's note: omg..my first request!! this was so fun, i've never written for mikey before. i hope you like it!!

Mikey peeks his head out, lifting the manhole cover up a couple of inches to get a look around. The sliver of light that flooded out from the outside was mesmerizing. He blinks, adjusting to the brightness. 

“Woah…!” He lifts the lid even higher. 

“What do you see?” Donnie whispers. “Is it a horse? I read that there are horses out there sometimes.”

“You read that there are horses in New York? Please,” Leo sighs. 

Raph climbed up the ladder behind the other three, urging them to keep moving. “Quit holdin’ up the line!”

Leo and Donnie crash into one another, knocking their noggins awkwardly. “OW!”

Heaving the manhole cover to the side, Mikey jumps through the air. He tucks his body in to do a quick backflip, crying out a high-pitched “Hoo-wah!”

Mikey stood in hushed amazement, taking in the view of the street they popped out of. He’d only seen places like this on T.V. or in comic books, or while sneaking secret looks through sewer drains. But to stand on the pavement, feeling the dirt and grit beneath his toes, it was something else. He simply couldn’t contain his excitement any longer. 

“This is amazing! Hello dumpster! Hello alley cat! Hello mysterious rainbow-colored puddle!” He hopped and skipped with glee, greeting every object his eyes fell on. 

Eventually, Donnie, Leo, and Raph made their way out of the sewer to join him. They too were taken with the mundane sights around them, amazed at the fact that they were finally above ground. Donnie had already pulled out a crumpled up notepad to scratch down notes. Little observations of the people and buildings he saw. Leo was equally enraptured, following Donnie around as he pointed out various things on the ground. 

“Woah, a used cigarette. Cool!”

“Don’t eat it,” Raph warns. 

The red-clad turtle was trying his best to stay vigilant of his brothers, making sure none of them wandered too far off or ingested something they shouldn’t. He couldn't help but be star-struck as well, however. The ambient sounds of cars passing by and humans talking amongst themselves filled his ears. Raph claps his hands together, getting the others’ attention. 

“Okay, boys. Splinter said we could come up and explore for exactly thirty minutes. Not thirty-one minutes, thirty minutes.” Raph gathered up everyone in a tight huddle, laying down the ground rules. “If any of you mess this up for us–”

“All we have to do is keep a low profile and not die, right?” Leo scoffs.

Mikey nods enthusiastically, siding with Leo. “Easy as pie!”

“I concur. Let us all go our separate ways and reconvene here in a half-hour. Commence the synchronizing of watches.” Donnie readjusts his glasses on the ridge of his nose before hitting a button on his wrist. 

That was all Mikey needed to hear before bounding away, giggling to himself. “Cowabunga!”

Raph was soon left standing by himself as the others followed suit, going off in separate directions. Sputtering, he calls out to them. “W-Wait up! Don’t leave me alone!”

Quickly, he chooses to run after Leo across the street. 

Mikey made a beeline through a nearby alleyway to explore its contents. The smell was strangely worse up here than it was down in the sewers. The pungent scent of garbage made his nose scrunch up in disgust. 

“Nasty. Humans just leave their trash lying out like this?”

Once he gets one last look at the graffiti markings on the brick wall, he flattens himself to the corner of the building to check out the perimeter. There were a couple people walking around, talking on phones and looking somewhat distracted. Taking a chance, Mikey steps out onto the sidewalk, suddenly very nervous. 

The locals didn’t seem too interested in a pre-teenage mutant ninja turtle, not so much as sparing him a passing glance. Mikey twiddles his fingers together, almost waiting for someone to scream out in horror. 

“Huh…” he blinks. “I guess New Yorkers really have seen everything.”

He scans around for a moment, casually people-watching. There were so many humans, and they all looked so different! 

Suddenly, his eyes catch a glimpse of a playground just a couple of yards away. His eyes go wide, sparkling. 

“Omigosh!” Without thinking, he sprints over.

The playground was sizable, seemingly a part of a larger park in the neighborhood. Mikey marveled at the monkey bars, jungle gym, and various slides. He does one more double-take, making sure there was no one else around, before launching himself into the air. 

“Aw, yeah! All mine, baby.”

For the next fifteen minutes or so, Mikey sampled all the playground had to offer. This kind of place was the perfect outlet for all his manic energy. He swung off of every monkey bar, climbed through all the plastic tunnels, and dug through the sandbox for any potential treasures that were hidden away. 

As he buried himself within a sand castle he constructed, Mikey patted himself into a cocoon. “There, perfect.”

“What are you doing?” A tiny voice calls out.

“Hm?”

Mikey turned his head toward the swingset to his left. Somehow, he failed to notice a human girl sitting right beside him. She sat clutching the chains of the swing, letting her foot move herself slightly back and forth. 

“I said, what are you doing? You’re gonna get sand everywhere.”

Mikey laid there, looking up to the sky in deep thought. Only his head was visible, while the rest of his body was buried in the sand. That must be the reason why she wasn’t terrified by the sight of his unusual green skin. 

“I like being buried.” He chirps. 

The girl continued to stare, pushing herself lazily on the swing. “Whatever.”

Mikey turns back and gives her a pleasant smile. He was thankful for the company, even if it was a slightly annoyed human. As he opened his eyes to fully look at her, he felt a sudden tightness in his chest. And it wasn’t just from being trapped in a sand prison. 

Mikey didn’t know how to describe it. He could look at a painting and call it beautiful, or look at the moon up above and say it was enchanting. But the person sitting next to him, looking at him with slight indignation, left him gobsmacked.

She tried to look away and continue to enjoy her swing in peace, but she felt Mikey’s eyes bore into her. 

“Do you want me to leave or something?” She sighs.

“What’s your name?”

She turns back to him, a small frown gracing her charming features. The way her scowl curled to the side was adorable. Every minute detail of her face was drawing Mikey in. 

“What’s your name?”

Suddenly, Mikey sits up and lets the sand fall from his person. “Michael. Angelo. Michaelangelo!”

Her annoyed expression falls away as she takes notice of his shell. The green skin, the bald head, suddenly it clicked. 

“You’re a…?”

Mikey scrambles up, putting his hands out in a placating gesture. “I-I know, it’s weird! Is it the mask? It’s the mask, isn’t it?”

He reaches up to untie it and pull it off of his head. Holding it out before him, Mikey waves it around in her face. “See!”

Scoffing, she bats his hand away. “I mean you’re a turtle!”

Mikey secures his mask back on before giving her another winning smile. He shoots his hand out for a shake. 

“Yup! And you are…?”

“I’m leaving.” She slaps his hand away again, rejecting his friendly gesture. 

Mikey watches as she moves to sit up, heart-broken. His lips tremble slightly as he rubs at his hand. Maybe he was being too presumptuous, but he didn’t really expect to get such a cold welcome his first day up on the surface. 

His eyes search around, desperate to find a reason to make her stay. “Wait! I can push you on the swing? If you want…?”

She stops, looking back at Mikey. After a couple seconds of contemplation, she sits back down.

“I guess that’s fine.”

Instantly, Mikey’s mood does a 180. “Yes!”

Stepping behind her, Mikey places his hands on the chains. He begins to step backward and lift the girl into the air. She gulps, her hands gripping tighter.

“This is kinda high.”

“That’s the best part! Here. We. Go!”

Then, Mikey reels back and lets the swing go. He doesn’t take into account the fact his strength was a little more intense than most, accidentally sending the girl flying.

Screaming, she does a full rotation. Mikey stares on in horror as she does another spin. And another. Eventually, she becomes tied to the top rung of the swing set, bound tightly by the chains. 

“That, uh…might be a little too high?” He chuckles.

“GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!” She wails, wiggling against her restraints. “How did you even do that?!”

Mikey quickly jumps up into the air and lands on the bar. He gives her an apologetic look, feeling like he was in real trouble. 

“Sorry! I’m so, so sorry! Let me just—“

She blinks at him, watching as he untangles her from the swing. “You’re…really strong!”

She grins in spite of herself. Her limbs finally go slack and she’s pulled up into Mikey’s grasp. He holds her for a second before gently setting her back on the ground. 

“I’m really sorry again. I kinda can’t control my own strength yet.”

Mikey hangs his head as he lands on the wood chip surface of the playground. 

She kicks her feet, feeling a little awkward for making such a fuss about it. He looked so genuine, tears forming in the corners of his eyes.

“It’s fine…That was actually kind of fun.”

Mikey looks up, hopeful. “It was?”

She nods, holding out her hand. “I’m Y/N, by the way.”

Mikey beams, his eyes shining like stars. He wasn’t sure what it was about this girl that was making him so upbeat. Well, more upbeat than he usually was. He launches forward and brings her into a tight hug, shaking her back and forth. 

“Y/N! You’re my first new human friend! The first of many!”

She groans, trying to escape his enthusiastic hold. “Okay, that’s enough!” 

Chucking, he releases her. “Right. Sorry, too much.”

Mikey rubs the back of his head, smiling goofily at her. She flits her eyes down to his mouth, noticing his missing tooth. Without thinking, she covers her mouth. 

“Your teeth.”

Mikey, feeling suddenly very bashful, closes his mouth. “Yeah, I know. My dad says the tooth gap will go away eventually, but…”

The girl blinks, moving her hand away. She didn’t mean to make him embarrassed at all. To Mikey’s shock, she breaks out in quiet laughter. 

“H-Hey!” He shouts, waving his hands around. “That’s not very nice!”

She laughs even harder, moving her hands away from her mouth. Then, Mikey sees it. She was missing her top right canine. 

Blushing, she points up to her teeth. “You’re just like me! I lost this tooth last week. That’s so funny!”

Mikey’s eyes go wide, watching her continue to heartily laugh. Slowly, his lips curl into a smile. He chuckles along with her, his voice steadily growing in volume. 

As the two of them wind down, Mikey’s smile falls away. He never really interacted with a real human before, was this how he was supposed to feel? His stomach was full of butterflies, hands opening and closing out of sheer restlessness. 

“Can I give you something?”

Walking back to lean against the swing, she nods. “Depends.”

Mikey sweats, realizing he didn’t really have anything to give her. He pats his chest, searching for a gift. “I— I’m gonna give you…”

Looking down, a couple of dandelions sprouting out of the corner of the sandbox catches his eye. Mikey quickly picks them from the ground and presents them to her. He accidentally tore them out by the roots, stringy grass and dirt dangling from the flowers. 

“Flowers! You’re supposed to give cute girls flowers!”

“You…think I’m cute?”

Before he can respond, Mikey notices a large clock face against the side of a neighboring building. It had already been a half-hour! Panicking, he shoves them into her hands before running away.

“GOODBYE!” He screeches.

Mikey peels out, sprinting back toward the direction of the manhole cover he emerged from. He stumbles and trips on the wood chips, accidentally getting some in his mouth. 

“Blecch—!”

He scrambles up to continue his ungrateful exit, leaving the girl behind. She sits dumbfounded, staring at the bouquet of dandelions. A small blush colors her cheeks. 

—

You smile to yourself, remembering the day you and Mikey first met. 

You look over to him as the two of you stroll through the same park. A good number of years later, things were relatively unchanged. The playground had a couple of updates, some new equipment. Tonight’s destination, however, was the botanical gardens. Mikey insisted that you accompany him tonight, eager to show you the exhibits.

“And, why couldn’t this have waited until tomorrow again?” You ask.

“Because,” he skips ahead, giving you his signature gap-toothed smile. “There’s no one around at night!”

You fold your hands behind your back, winking at him. “So we’re breaking in.”

“No. We’re sneaking in.” He corrects.

Chuckling, you playfully shove him aside. “You just want an excuse to hang out with me alone, don’t you?”

You close your eyes, confidently walking forward. You hear Mikey sputter and cough, having seemingly been found out. He tries his best to cover up his bashfulness with a cool facade. 

“W-What’s so wrong with some good-natured plant watching between friends? You need a little more culture in your life, and who better to provide it than me.”

Mikey places his thumb and forefinger on his chin, his eyes glinting under the dull moonlight. 

“Uh-huh. Sure,” you scoff. 

You didn’t consider yourself a particularly perceptive person. Especially when it came to matters of deciphering people’s intentions. But, Michael was unfortunately kind of an open book. He wore his heart on his sleeve, the poor guy. 

Even a fool could see that he was head over heels for you. You’re not too sure if Mikey had always had a crush on you, but lately he had made quite an effort to shower you with attention. His texts were more frequent, sending you random online quizzes and songs that you just had to see. Mikey was always pretty touchy-feely with his family and friends, giving out plenty of hugs. He was a very physically intimate turtle, sometimes to your detriment. 

“We’re here!”

His voice rips you from your thoughts and you glance up. 

Before you stood a grand building, composed almost entirely of glass windows. The yard surrounding the gardens were almost a little more impressive, countless hedges and water features decorating the area. 

Mikey slides up next to you, waggling his eyebrows. “Right?”

“Okay, this is pretty cool.” You smirk.

“I know. Allow me to razz my tazz…”

You watch as he backflips into the air and sticks to the exterior of the glass building. How did he do that, you wonder? Mikey feels around the glass panel, looking for the loose edge to wiggle himself into. He finally finds it, knocking his elbow against the window. 

Suddenly, he slides in, letting out a surprised squawk. “WOAH—!”

You cringe hearing him fall through a number of limbs, leaves shaking and vines ripping from the impact. The jungle of foliage inside was dense, so you can’t really see where Mikey lands. You run up to the service door, waiting for him to give you some sort of signal.

“Oh, Michael? Are you dead?” You cup your hands together, calling out to him in a sing-song voice. 

Pressing your face against the door, you strain your ears to listen closely. Silence. You click your tongue in annoyance.

“I’m gonna call Raph.” You slowly reach for your pocket.

Mikey slams his head against the other side of the door, his pleading face squished against the glass. “NO, DON’T!”

“AAAH—! Don’t jumpscare me like that!” You shriek. 

Mikey quickly throws open the door before pulling you in by your shirt collar. Stumbling in, you nearly fall over. You huff indignantly while he lifts you back up on your feet. For such a little guy, he sure was strong. 

“Falling for me already, eh?” He jokes. 

You flick his nose. “In your dreams.”

He awkwardly snickers at you, feeling a little shy about his casual flirtation. Mikey didn’t know if he was coming off as cute or just creepy, unable to gauge your reaction. You were always a little more cool and collected than him, your quick wit and charm rivaling even Leo’s. It was humbling, even a little attractive. He follows you from behind like a love-sick puppy, desperate to impress you. 

The two of you eventually walk into the center of the botanical garden and stand in awe of the plant life. Part of you wishes that Donnie was here to inform you both on each and every plant name, he was full of fun facts like that. But, you were happy just to have Mikey here to yourself. It was a good opportunity to test out a theory you had brewing in the back of your brain. 

“So, what first?” You smile, turning to Mikey. “Lead the way.”

He gives you an even bigger smile, eager to have you on the hook. “Oh! There’s that one stink plant!”

He directs you to the right, walking ahead of you before stopping dead in his tracks. You peek your head over his shoulder, looking around curiously.

“What?”

“I, uh— I forgot we kinda made it into a mutant with a security guard.” He chuckles.

You stare at his face, looking all at once bashful and spacey. Smirking, you edge your head closer to his. You were usually pretty touch-averse, but maybe you could try being more physically intimate with him. Just to see what would happen.

“Maybe that’s for the best. I know you have a very sensitive nose,” you whisper. 

Mikey covertly gulps, caught off guard by your sudden closeness and your low voice in his ear. “Let’s go look at the babbling brook! I think I can hear it…babbling!”

Spinning around, he grabs your hand and drags you along behind him. 

You bite at your lower lip, entertained by his flustered behavior. You hated to admit it, but teasing Mikey was just too much fun. You hold his hand tighter.

“Aww, it’s like a tiny waterfall!” You gush, walking up to stand beside Mikey. “I wonder if there are any fish in here?”

Mikey shakily lets go of you, placing his hands on his hips. “There actually are. Lemme show you!”

You furrow your brows, watching Mikey step into the tiny river. The water led to a larger pond, lilly pads and other aquatic plants scattered about the surface.

“That’s probably a bad idea,” you warn. You follow him along the bank, careful not to step on any of the flowers.

“Relax. I’m a turtle, water is my natural habitat.”

You narrow your eyes. “Don’t Ornate box turtles drown really easily?”

He tosses his head at you, continuing to march forward. “That’s a myth.”

You fold your arms over your chest, meeting his cocky gaze with your unimpressed scowl. 

“Let’s see…I think I saw a fish somewhere around here.” Mikey leans down, moving aside a lily pad to investigate. “Ah-hah! Told ya.”

He shoots back up, holding out an orange-spotted koi fish. It thrashed wildly in his grasp, flapping its tail against his hand. 

Sighing, you walk closer to the edge of the pond. “You’re gonna regret that.”

“I’m putting it right back, okay? Chill—“

Suddenly, a whole army of koi fish swarm around Mikey’s feet in the water. They apparently did not take too kindly to his rude intrusion. You wordlessly watch on as Mikey got practically attacked by a dozen or so fish, their tails repeatedly slapping against his body.

“Woah, hey! Stop that! I’m not your enemy! AAA—!” Mikey tries to run out, lifting his legs high and shaking off a fish that had clamped its jaw onto his foot. 

Your hands grip onto your arms in an attempt to stop yourself from laughing. But, as soon as you see Mikey fall into the water, you break. Cackling, you grab at your sides as Mikey pitifully splashed around in the pond. 

“This is amazing!” You tease. “I’m sending this in the group chat.”

“Help me! I lied, I’m drowning!” Mikey screams, waving his limbs about. 

You hold your phone out and start recording a video, chuckling. “The water’s barely a foot deep.”

The last koi fish gives Mikey a harsh slap across the face, leaving him behind to lie in the water. He looked utterly shocked and defeated. 

Once you’ve gotten all the evidence you need, you stow your phone away and kick off your shoes and socks. You were cruel, but you weren’t that cruel. 

“Okay, I think you’ve had enough.” You roll up the cuffs of your pants and gingerly step into the pond, holding out your hand to Mikey.

Blinking up at you, he scowls. “I could have died back there.”

You purse your lips, resolving to just reach down and pull Mikey up by the edge of his plastron. “Serves you right for disrespecting the pond.”

As you lifted him out of the water, his body was stiff as a board. His face was still screwed into an exaggerated frown. You can’t help but chuckle again at him, wiping off some pond scum that had gotten stuck to his shell. 

“What?” He pouts.

“You’re so cute when you look like that.” You pull Mikey out of the pond, peeking back at his offended expression.

“That’s totally not demeaning.”

Once you both get back onto the path, you give him an apologetic smile. “I’m sorry, okay? You just have a naturally cute face.”

Your hands drift up to land on Mikey’s face, gently squishing his cheeks. His eyes were still angry, but you could tell from his blush and his wavering frown that you were really testing his resolve. You knew he wasn’t really mad, just embarrassed. It only made him even more cute. 

Mikey stared at you, using almost all of his willpower not to melt into your touch. You had never been so brazen, so comfortable with casually touching him like this. The cheeky way you were looking at him only made him more flustered. Clearing his throat, he dips out of your hold. 

“The succulents are over here.”

Huffing, he marches away. You can only smirk to yourself as you follow behind. Maybe you were teasing him a little too much. You didn’t really care, though. With a pep in your step, you catch up to meet him at the desert flora section. 

You saw a collection of cacti, some towering over your heads, others small and rotund. Mikey shakes off his growing nerves to present them to you. 

“Behold, the pokey plants. As you can see, they are covered in pokey bits.”

Nodding, you sit your chin upon your fist. “Ah, yes. Very pokey indeed.”

The two of you nod to one another in mock-seriousness. You watch as Mikey begins to smile again, and you feel a little relieved. While you quite enjoyed seeing him playfully mad, you can’t deny that you miss seeing him happy. 

Mikey quirks his head to the side, an idea knocking around in his head. “I wonder…”

You cock your head as well. “Wonder what?”

“Dare me to touch it?” He lifts a hand up toward a particularly sharp-looking cactus. 

You shift your eyes from the plant and back to him, cautiously interested. “I won’t stop you.”

“I’m gonna do it,” he warns. 

“Fine. See what happens.” You toss your hand over your shoulder, walking away. This was bound to end well. 

Before you know it, you hear a loud crunching sound behind you. You twist around to find Mikey crumpled over the cactus’s broken trunk, absolutely covered in thorns. His eyes were as wide as saucers, almost in disbelief of his own actions. 

“Michael!” You gasp. “I swear to god.”

Shuddering, he crawls out of the exhibit, moving through the pebbles that laid about. “Pain…I’m in pain.”

You turn your back to him, exasperated with his antics. “I’m not helping you.”

“Don’t need it. I’m perfectly capable of helping myself.” He stands, legs wobbling. He tries to grab at a large spine poking out of his forearm. 

“Ow.” One thorn. 

“Ow.” Another. 

You grumble, listening to Mikey remove the spines one by one. This was just sad. You slowly turn around, watching as he stands there plucking at his arm. Sighing, you decide to be a little more merciful. 

“You’re lucky you have that shell.” 

You find a nearby bench and plant yourself on it. You pat your hand to the seat next to you, beckoning him to sit down. “Come here.”

Mikey quickly pads over to sit in front of you, swinging his legs around the bench. You follow suit and do a once-over. Thankfully, his legs were mostly unharmed, but his upper body and face were covered in barbs. 

“What did we learn?” You sigh, carefully removing all of the larger spines. 

Mikey tries holding back each cry of pain as you pluck them out, his eyes squeezing shut. “I wasn’t trying to throw myself into a cactus, you know. I just tripped.”

“That’s why are you covered in pokey bits?”

“I– Ouch!” He seethes, recoiling away from you. “I was trying to be cool, okay. Aren’t you impressed?”

Chuckling dryly, you move on to the smaller, more difficult barbs. You knew he was just trying to show off, even if it was kind of pathetic. Internally, you frown. No, he wasn’t pathetic. You somehow felt bad for even thinking that. It wasn’t like he was putting on airs, or being fake. He was actually pretty genuine. 

“Not impressed. Just slightly concerned.”

Mikey sniffs, feeling a little disheartened with your reply. “Sorry.”

You flit your eyes up for a moment. “Why do you think you have to impress me? I already think you’re cool.”

He turns his head away slightly. “I don’t know? I just want to.”

Mikey was usually pretty good about verbalizing his emotional desires. But for some reason, he felt so confused. 

After you pick out the last barb from his cheek, you toss them all away into the bushes. “There, all done.”

You were about to stand back up before you felt Mikey grab at your upper arm. You freeze, looking down at him. 

“I just– Sometimes I feel like I need to show off. Show you that I’m cool and strong, I guess? I’m not super buff like Raph, or smooth like Leo. And I’m definitely not smart like Donnie.”

You move to sit back down, staring at him. You don’t know how to react to his sudden confession, simply opting to remain silent. 

Mikey lifts his head to look you in the eye, a sad smile tugging at his lips. “I just want to make you feel safe.”

You frown. “You think I don’t feel safe?”

Shaking his head, Mikey bails on his own admission. “No, I don’t know. Nevermind.”

In an instant, you get an idea. You rummage around in your bag to pull out your old, worn sketchbook that you carried around everywhere. You leaf through the pages to land in the middle. “You recognize this?”

Mikey blinks away a tear that threatened to accumulate in his eye before looking over. “Your sketchbook?”

“No, this.” You reach in and pull out a couple of pressed flowers. They were shriveled and brown with age, but they were very clearly dandelions. 

Mikey’s sad frown melts away as he leans forward. “Those are…”

“The flowers you gave me. When I first met you, I was actually kind of freaked out. I just remember thinking, ‘Why was this weird turtle harassing me?’” You allow yourself to smile, recalling the memory. 

You hear Mikey chuckle quietly, his eyes softening. 

“But, you were obviously just a huge dork. Sweet, but still a dork. I took those weeds you gave me and put them in here.”

You carefully place them back into your sketchbook, closing it. “I carried them with me all the time, so I wouldn’t feel so alone, y’know? If I ever felt scared, I would just clutch onto this and pretend you were there.”

Mikey sat up straighter, letting your soft words wrap him up into a warm blanket. He felt so safe, so secure in your presence. 

“Thankfully, I didn’t have to do it too often. Because you were always there, somehow.”

Finally, you put your sketchbook back into your bag and look up. You give Mikey a lopsided smile, watching him look at you with quiet amazement. Reaching up, you place your hand upon his flushed cheek, bathing in his warmth. 

Mikey was speechless. Words couldn’t begin to describe what he was feeling right now. He unintentionally allows his head to nuzzle up against your hand, practically sighing. 

“You okay?”

“My skin kind of hurts.” His voice was oddly low, laced with a shy sweetness. 

Leaning forward, you debate with yourself whether or not you want to tease him even more. He looked so vulnerable right now, you wouldn’t dare ruin a rare moment like this. Humming, you indulge yourself and decide to place a soft kiss upon his cheek. You didn’t want to scare him off. 

Mikey’s skin tingles with excitement, electric sparks surging through his body. “Hahh…”

“Am I hurting you,” you whisper. You weren’t sure if he was hissing out in pleasure or in pain. 

He immediately responds. “No, you feel really nice.”

Angling your head lower, you slot your lips gently against his. The kiss is chaste and short, but you feel your heartbeat thrum in your ears. The low light of the night sky illuminated the two of you, making Mikey’s skin practically glow. Moving an inch or two away, you admire his features. 

Mikey sighs, his eyes fluttering open. You meet his soft gaze with your own. After a charged couple of seconds, the two of you break out into laughter. His head falls onto the bend of your shoulder, his breath heavy. 

“I can’t believe you did that.” He exhales shakily. 

“Pull out nearly a hundred cactus spines from your body? Yeah, I can’t believe it either.” You chuckle. 

In a bold move, Mikey smiles against your neck before placing a kiss on your hot skin. You shudder, feeling his teeth brush up against your pulse. 

“Woah-hoh-hoh! Ouch!” You tear yourself away, flapping your hands at his face. “Your teeth are sharper than I thought.”

Mikey gives you a cheeky smile, his tooth-gap on full display. “Sorry, I’m kinda pokey.”

He feels his heart swell in his chest, his limbs going limp and gooey. He wondered if he could even stand up. Seemingly reading his mind, you reach over and hook your arms underneath him. In an impressive move, you heave Mikey up and carry him bridal-style. 

“H-Hey! What are you doing?” He cries out, blushing furiously.

“Carrying you back. Because I can,” you smirk. 

Out of sheer embarrassment, Mikey covers his face. “I didn’t know you could do that.”

“Neither did I!”

And with that, you make your way back to the exit, giggling with Mikey as you bask in your newfound closeness. You hope that he felt safe with you, safe enough to let you into his heart just a little bit more. 

#rottmnt x reader #mikey x reader #rottmnt mikey x reader #michelangelo x reader #tmnt x reader #sfw #requests #this became a lot longer than i originally intended lol

[tofautisawa]

Sorry for opening a can of worms, but you mentioned a certain lion indie project did damage on how people view lions and lion media. I was just curious on why you say that.

Hoo boy this is gonna be a long post. I was mostly vaguing on how it's a possibility that My Pride may have skewed people's perception on lion behavior as well as how and what people might people expect from lion media by smaller creators, especially if they are a younger audience who might take everything that happens in it as 100% accurate to lion behavior. Let's not pretend that it's creator didn't influence and inspired a lot of people.

It's a bit of a stretch, I know and I am mostly speaking through experience of what I witnessed in the comments of my own comic and what I have seen towards online media that happens to have lions in it. It has basically died down now, so what I am mentioning was when My Pride was pretty much in it's prime. Thankfully, I didn't get it the worst but I can't say the same for some others. From what I recall, My Pride advertised itself as "The Lion King but realistic", and even though I feel they messed up that "realistic" aspect part, it wouldn't bother me as much if people didn't act like lion media they discover afterwards somehow has to operate exactly the freaking same or that My Pride is the pinnacle of realistic lion behavior so if you step outside of what is portrayed as "Pride Law" in your own works, it's gets questioned or people will flat out say it's incorrect. Pride Law was even brought up when Silver and Gatura had their fight for example even though no such thing even exists in my comic, and a comment mentioned that males will fight til one of them dies which I have never seen in a one on one fight, even if it did happen most of the time the losing male will retreat. But it happened in My Pride so Silver running away is unrealistic I guess. And no, Pride Law getting some things right about lions at a surface level doesn't NOT count. Just because lions commit infantcide in real life doesn't mean My Pride portrayal of it is 100% accurate because the circumstances on WHY they are doing it isn't realistic nor does it make a lick of sense. Don't get me started when people referred to my male lion characters as "manes". Ugh...

Anyway.... Given that Tau ( and by a lesser extent, Silver) get questioned on how they even have prides because they aren't aggressive who killed to get where they are, I can't help but wonder if this is just the standard now because every single male in My Pride ( if they weren't killed off) was a dick. And since "PRUYDE LAHW" states that a male lion's role in a pride is to lead and protect the pride, you couldn't POSSIBLY have a pride in your own works where the roles are reversed and the lionesses are the main protectors. Or that a lioness can simply have a male in a pride for no other reason other than she loves him and isn't just laying around having his cubs because of some "rules".

Speaking of lionesses, you'd be surprised at how many people now think that lionesses will in no way defend their cubs when another male shows up or hell, join in the fight themselves. I feel like people would not have criticized Tau's pride so much if HE was the aggressor and Ekene just sat being submissive because that is what is expected because something popular that claimed to be realistic portrayed it as such. As well as thinking that lionesses are completely weak pathetic creatures made out of wet toilet paper that even if they completely outnumber a single male, he could somehow beat them all without getting a scratch on his body. Nevermind that in real life, lionesses have been known to even turn on their males and kill them.

And some other things that probably escape my mind right now because this post is getting long, and I am just bitching at this point because I been holding back these opinions for quite a while now. Like I said, I know this is a huge stretch and most of it probably stems from my own bitterness. So I will be fair in this aspect, Even though I feel like the creator should not have advertised this as "realistic" since My Pride is HEAVY on the fantasy elements and tries to tackle issues like Homophobia- I know it's not 100% the shows fault and that people themselves should learn to separate different medias unless a creator flat out states that said media they are doing takes place in the My Pride universe or was inspired by it. My comic is definitely not inspired by My Pride, especially since I first started this comic long before it came out and while some thing have changed about my story over the years, the same major story beats were already planned and there was no "Pride Law" around to even influence that, not that it would have regardless.

#ask #off topic ask

[necrolexic0n]

Currently rebrowsing through your epic art and a very stupid thought came into my mind that you’ve probably answered before.

When it comes to EdgyMcEdgelord what are your favorite headcanons n whatnot from your epic self and many others in the fandom even if it’s not from tumblr..?

List everything if you wish :)

WELL!

if i talked about my favorite headcanons i would just be blabbing ab my interpretation of Edge so that i will do

all blabbing is under the cut!!! carefully curated headcanons for the soul

- definitely an fps game kinda guy. takes major pride in his quick reflexes and good aim.

- not the greatest at communication, of course. he puts himself down before he can get half a sentence out when he’s too embarrassed or nervous.

- plenty of scars. scratches and chips, especially on his ribcage and hands. he picks at his fingers, slowly grinding away at the bone, in the same way someone would pick at the hangnails on a finger.

- still has 1HP, but is getting up there in levels. due to the trauma he’s endured and the anomaly fucking up the timelines, his HP never really changes; his attack, however….better watch it around this guy.

- how he lost his tooth? ask him and he’ll threaten you. ask me? think he uh..”fell” down and now he’s “sans” a tooth LOL….but uh, seeing how his au is? that’s probably not the case, the poor dear…

- he’s actually a huge softie. quite cuddly! he’ll never admit it but he does enjoy soft, loving touches to his face. he’d rub his cheekbone in his lover’s hand like a dog wanting pets. yer not supposed to know that though.

- he also snores. a lot. most of the time it’s a bit quiet, but if he’s laying in the wrong position, i doubt you’ll be getting much sleep that night, heh.

- while he’s still short sporting a solid 5’1, he makes up for it in width. he’s a pretty decently sized monster!

- his eye lights are red! they’re a bit of a dark, dim red. but his eye for magic is a striking crimson. it flashes between red and yellow!

- isn’t THAT much of a sleaze but he enjoys sex jokes as much as the next frat boy.

- he is not a frat boy.

- i promise.

- besties with Classic! they’re bbfs! best bros forever.

- he doesn’t hate his brother. they don’t hate each other. sure, they get on each other’s nerves like all siblings do, maybe worse on some days, but they definitely don’t hate each other.

- there’s a small crack on his face leading from his gold tooth!

- DEFINITELY a jewelry guy. gold chain, gold rings, big fan.

- would never attack an innocent. not even for the gold or EXP. not only is he too lazy, but deep down he still has some hope in his soul. he would never really hurt let alone kill anyone unless absolutely necessary.

- his attacks are stronger, yes, but he isn’t as tactical as Classic. he tends to tire out a bit quicker, but his attacks are harder to dodge.

- likes dark humor and puns, but knock knock jokes are his favorite.

- enjoys a good mustard but prefers it on the sweeter side. that’s a secret though.

- his time spent in the lab was less with numbers and more the actual physical engineering part. he’s a hands-on learner and hobbyist! will occasionally tinker with something when he’s bored.

- dc comics lover. hands down. likes batman a normal amount (lying).

- bisexual, demi-romantic. you’ve gotta be REAL special to catch his eye. anyone would think he’s completely aromantic, even himself, but once ya get him started…hoo boy.

- has an impressive body count both on the battlefield and in the bedroom but uh…that’s not really a surprise, is it?

- prefers a private life. he would be a gaming streamer but have toby fox levels of privacy. guess that makes this post pretty redundant lol

- likes cars! but likes motorcycles more. the cars interest was passed to his brother.

- he loves dogs!! especially big dogs. any big scary dog. st. bernard, doberman, pitbull, great danes, you name it. he knows the secret of the biggest dogs being the sweetest.

- for his human design he has a few piercings and tattoos. he would have them if he could get them for sure!

- does boxing when he’s angry, helps blow off steam. he does it more for the purpose of enjoyment when on the surface.

- this man LOVES donuts. i don’t understand his obsession. he just really likes them.

- will fuck up a burger retired spider-man style.

- definitely still an asshole. standoffish to anyone he doesn’t know. he’s an asshole to the people he cares about too, just in a loving way. he’ll call you stupid and roughhouse but is still careful with you regardless.

- cigar smoker fs

- doesn’t remember resets all that well but definitely knows their happening

- moderate to severe insomnia

- bro found a console in the waterfall dump heap and made it work. has like two games on it.

- doesn’t cuss as much as people think. a casual sentence enhancer user. nothing too wild but he has a..large arsenal of swears. you might catch one in spanish if ya pay close enough attention.

#i love this guy to bits and he’s so fun to draw n talk about #just a lil guy. goober of a man #i wanna add even more but i could do that later akdhfksh #utmv #undertale #undertale au #underfell #underfell sans #headcanons #cw suggestive #//suggestive hhh

[hello-eeveev]

14, 18 for the fanfic asks!

Fic Writer Asks!

(previously answered)

14. If you could see one of your fics adapted into a visual medium, such as comic or film, which fan fic would you pick?

I think I answered a similar question a while ago, but the answer is still the same: Miss You Dearly!

I mean, it’s a rom-com in everything but its conclusion, so we already know all the fun stuff we could do with it in a visual medium. As I said in the previous ask, “I think the scene where they're setting up for the party and Caleb casts Major Image to create the fairy lights, then he and Essek lock eyes would be really cute. I'm talking slow motion, then they look at each other and the music swells, lingering shots on their faces, shoujo bubbles, the whole nine yards.” I still want this.

Plus, it’s got music! And dancing! It would be a lovely time!

Oh! I just remembered a joke I had had that one of the board games brought to the party is Jenga, which is really hard to play on a boat and any attempts to do so go disasterously. I had to cut this bit for pacing, but I think it would a a really fun visual gag in the background!

18. What’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

Hoo boy. Time to go reread everything I’ve ever posted hold on—

Okay, so I actually had a great time doing that I’m writing this at 1:30 in the morning and experiencing what I would call a ~mood high~ so thank you for encouraging me <3

So, the answer is the final line in Chapter 1 of All Things End, All Things Change, but I don’t want to post it here and spoil it for anyone who hasn’t read it (because the context and the one-two punch I pull off at the end is what makes me love this line as much as I do).

So instead I’ll give another favorite line from Chapter 2 of All Things End, All Things Change and a bit of commentary.

This is spoken by Essek to Caleb:

“Rest, my friend. There is time for that now.”

I feel like when I’m writing Shadowgast that has at least some focus on Caleb’s whole deal, the prevailing vibe is that Essek and I are (lovingly) throwing blankets at Caleb and telling him to take a nap. Which is absolutely what’s happening here.

BUT the reason this line probably sounds familiar to keen readers is that I deliberately wanted to draw a line between early-campaign Caleb—who needed Molly to tell him “time for that later”—and a post-campaign Caleb who is finally in a safe and stable enough place to sit with his grief. And he does get another forehead kiss to go along with it, don’t worry <3

Is this propaganda to get more people to read All Things End, All Things Change?

Maybe. Yeah. A little.

(I’m half-joking, the answers are sincere. But like, half the time even I forget how much I love this fic until I read it again and I get so excited about it and want people to be excited about it with me!!!)

#thank you thank you 💕 #answered ask #anon ask #ask game #shadowgast #caleb widogast #essek thelyss #eve talks #eve’s writing

[zanathan-aisling]

seeing people who hate chainsaw man explain why they hate it fucking owns. for one thing i’m glad i’m past taking shit personally even about what i gave up and declared my Favorite Thing Everrr, but like. the biggest part is like. theres of course glaring shit to be pointed out and questioned about CSM and how it depicts certain subjects and people. its treatment of women is.... fucking *weird*, galloping between quasifeminist (from a “let female characters be real people with real faults” perspective) and just straight up “every woman is just out to get poor young men. fucking bitches. >:(” and while I do ******not******* think it ever actually falls into the latter its not something i could ever blame someone for taking away from the text or interpreting as the intent. where and when it chooses to properly full-on sexualize characters is its own can of worms, showing remarkable restaint at *points* keeping denji’s horndoggedness third person slash not sullying the audience perspective with Direct Thirsty Male Gaze Shit (USUALLY), but it also pulls a *lot* of (RELATIVELY tasteful given. some. other anime but i might’ve just blown out my perspective on what constitutes tasteful from having poisoned myself with bakemonogatari as a teenager.....) nudity with Reze, who unlike Makima has no stated age and is presented as a far more “viable” love interest for the runt than her confirmed-to-be-a-working-adult ass. leaving the possibility that she’s underage (her design isn’t really that helpful given kobeni is like 20 and absolutely tiny). If she ISNT underage then that leaves room for the interpretation that the story is positively comparing her being romantic with denji to another adult doing similar, which is fucked up, but frankly the narrative doesn’t exactly condone what she pulls it just doesn’t spoonfeed you the fact that “denji still trying to romance the woman who bit his tongue off would be bad” WHICH MAYBE WAS ASKING TOO MUCH OF THE AUDIENCE BC. HOO BOY HOWDY HOWDY HOWDY LOOK AT THOSE SHIPPERS (IMO when she goes back to run away with him its not a romantic impulse on her part. the story more than establishes fair reason for her to try to “save” him from the city life that isn’t amorously-oriented. I’d be fine with it if she actually is his age though, which isn’t out of the question actually bc she’s practically a genderbend of yoshida design-wise sfldhsgklhksdghlksgd. That’d still come with the other “well that option makes the narrative worse in X way” things described earlier though.) THEN THERES THE LESBIAN ORGY AND I THINK THAT SPEAKS FOR ITSELF??? THERES NOT MUCH TO SAY THERE. THE HYPERVIGILANT PART OF MY BRAIN WANTS TO BRING UP HOW MUCH SMALLER THE FIENDS ARE THAN QUANXI BUT AGAIN KOBENI IS LIKE THE HEIGHT OF A MOUSE. OTHER THAN THAT I GOT NOTHING TO ADD OTHER THAN “FULL FRONTAL LESBIAN ORGY IN A SHONEN BY AN AUTHOR THATS at least for now A MAN”. 

But like. That got away from me for a bit. I love the manga to *death*, again its like the best fucking comic ever made bury me with it, but theres tons that even I could point out. EVEN from a narrative standpoint, the aspect that i think is the most perfect and wonderful, has fairly large holes that could do with criticism. Theres a lotta shit wrong with that piece of work. 

My ACTUAL point, and the point that makes criticisms of it “fucking own”, is that the manga is so god damn direct in its ethos that all people REALLY need to say as to why they don’t like it is “jesus christ denji is a horny gross wierdo”. Series comes with its own lightning rod for having to explain why you don’t like it. basically everything objectionable about it can be summed up one way or another with just talking shit about the protagonist. it rules its funny as fuck he’s like a rodeo clown. 

#chainsaw man spoilers #zanathan book hour #csm

[xaracosmia]

ꕥ — WELCOME TO EXO COSMIA, ROMAN SIONIS. 🌑

ꕥ  — OOC INFORMATION;

name/alias: Thysto age: 28 pronouns: he/they ooc contact: thyripsto (twt)  other characters in xc: Vespa Crabro, White Mask Varre

ꕥ  — IC INFORMATION;

name: Roman Sionis  age: Late 30s-early 40s.  pronouns: he/him series: DC Comics canon point: After his death (Primarily drawn from Catwoman 2005 run). app triggers: Hoo boy, I am trying to cover every possible base here. Abuse (familial and by romantic partner), murder, torture, arson, burning alive, gun and gang violence, death, lots of medical mentions (disease, near death, hospitals, procedures, lasting damage/brain damage), drug/alc mention

personality:

There is nothing that can be described as ‘pleasant’ in Roman Sionis. Well, maybe one thing - he is witty and funny, but in a way that is dry and sarcastic, intended to barb at something or someone else. Beyond that, however…not really. 

Demanding, harsh, and aggressive, Sionis is a man who was at the top of the world, fell, and then clawed his way up again. He expects everyone around him to know that he possesses a certain level of power and presence, and when they don’t, he will beat it into them. His temper is famously short - and he will take it out on everybody else around him. A minor inconvenience can turn into an outburst, and when he is mad he yells - even louder than he normally does. 

The root cause of this is in his history, sure, but it is the same thing that prevents him from improving as a person. His self-confidence and ego, his inability to as for help or admit fault, the fear of weakness and perception that any and all things that cannot be done on his own are a weakness - all of it plays in his head. And while he is certainly not unsure of his actions or of his self, he is incapable and uncertain in the face of vulnerability, in opening up to others, in a relationship that isn’t more than the man giving the orders and the person taking it - or the person who needs to be killed. 

He tends towards the self-destructive, but in ways beyond that of the physical. Oh no, he is very mindful of his own bodily limits, though he keeps those a secret - instead, he tears down anything good that might come to him, before it can reach in and attach to him. Before he really starts to feel and care. Before it can hurt. 

That might be what it all comes down to - fear. And what does fear do? It makes him angry. That’s part of the trouble with him, the damage in his brain; it makes everything jump, skip right to the worst, and therapy for it? Forget it. That’s more weakness. 

something your muse struggles with: Everything to do with interpersonal relationships, particularly when it comes to vulnerability. To show weakness is to make yourself a target, and to grow fond is to make your heart weak and frail. He’s lonely and he will self-sabotage and he has died alone once.

your muse’s greatest strength: He is stubborn. It’s a fault, but also a blessing - he will not give up on things when he sets to it, no matter the pain he goes through. He will ALWAYS find a way to win - even when it kills him. 

history/background:

Roman Sionis should have been loved. Instead, he was just an icon. 

His mother was disinterested in parenting – hell, she was disinterested in being married. Instead, she took to his father for the money, and he took to her because she was an easy arrangement: she gives him a son, an heir, and then she can do whatever it is she wants with the money. They never had any love. Richard Sionis didn’t BELIEVE in the idea of it - he saw the world in terms of people who wanted something and how much they wanted to take, and assumed that every interaction was the beginning of a transaction, even if it wasn’t stated. It’s a mindset Roman would inherit - but that comes later. 

The young Sionis was the solitary heir to a long-standing business empire. The Sionis family was rich and prolific - their name old, notable. For ages, they had owned Sionis Steelworks, one of the largest industrial factories in Gotham, alongside several other notable businesses (the one of note here will be Janus cosmetics). Rich and given any material object he wanted, he was the image of a spoiled son - only one without any love, any example. His care was administered by nannies and maids paid well, but not well enough to deal consistently with a child that felt the world was owed to him. A child already predisposed to lashing out for attention. 

He was also a child not told enough tips for his own wellbeing. Playing late into the evening (rather than return to a loveless inside, where his current guardian would depart and he would be left sitting with his father for hours), he came across a raccoon. Raised on television and comics, he thought it might, perhaps, be just as friendly as the mascot he had been seeing. 

I don’t need to tell you a wild animal isn’t. 

The cut on chest and hands were given a casual treatment, he was told how stupid he was, and he was sent off. It wasn’t until his fever reached 104 degrees a while later that they bothered to take him to the hospital, despite showing signs of malaise for days; it was just a shame he was trapped home sick from his fancy, gated-in rich kid school.

It was meningitis. It should have been fatal. Throw enough money at a problem, though, and they can cure your seven year old. It left Roman damaged; some things just don’t heal up right, especially when scarred that young. His emotional regulation would never be “just right,” and he was left with severe hearing loss. 

Let’s skip ahead, past his college partying and all the fleeting, unimportant relationships and faces who only wanted to be near him for the money and the prestige. He was good at keeping them around. Yes, let’s skip right ahead to when he worked at Janus Cosmetics, learning through experience beneath his old man. Let’s skip ahead to Circe. 

She was a model at Janus, a new one. She was pretty, she was sweet and spoke softly, and more than anything, she didn’t know who Roman was. Didn’t know he was the big boss’ son, didn’t know he was rich and powerful. It meant that she didn’t want anything from him, no money, no power. She just wanted to be by him for him, laugh with him because he was funny, love him because he was him. They were inseparable fast, and he proposed even faster. 

His parents did not accept it. They threatened him, threatened her, threatened everything. Kick him out, strip everything away. Roman, weak, upset, complained of it - and Circe simply told him to kill them. Kill them, and they could have anything. Or else she would have to go. 

So he did it. He lit the curtains on fire and locked them in the old sitting room, listened until they stopped screaming, and then called it in. Of course there was nothing left. He inherited everything - and a series of bad business decisions and blissful spending on Circe later, everything at her behest, everything to make her happy, keep her happy, keep her with him - and he was bankrupt. 

Old Bruce Wayne bailed him out - something Roman will never forget and never forgive. Still, he had Circe. He had her right there with him. She would never leave him, she loved him so much. Only she didn’t. Only it was all a lie, and not long after she buried a knife in his shoulder and left him for dead. One hospital trip later and he got a diagnosis - a finite number on his lifespan, and one much smaller than others. 

With nothing left, he went on one last bender, stumbled to the mausoleum in the pouring rain. Screamed at the burnt up corpse of his father through the doorway - then slipped on the steps and tumbled down. He smashed his head on the ebony wood coffin, and delirious, thought up a new form of reversal. A new form of rebirth. A new identity. 

In a stupor he carved the first pass of a design from the coffin. A skull. A face of Death. Everything that followed and haunted him. When he emerged after the storm, he decided to become the Black Mask. And so his criminal career began.

Just with one catch - he made sure to hunt Circe down and enact his revenge on her. Burn her beautiful face until there was nothing left, torture her till she begged. She responded in kind, lighting him on fire - sealing the mask on his face forever. 

Maybe it’s mundane. Maybe it’s magic. Either way, the mask is here to stay. Roman Sionis is an echo. Black Mask is the real man, now. 

powers/abilities:

Roman is a mundane guy. Not a power to his name. 

inherent abilities: 

Combat Know-How - Enough boxing, scrapping, and gunplay to get himself by. He isn’t a professional MMA fighter or anything, but he can make a hell of a dent in something. Beyond that, he has a very, very VERY deep love for everything with a nice, sharp blade. And he’s really good with them (No, I don’t know how or when he learned how to use a sword well, but he DOES). 

items/weapons: 

Twin Handguns - A pair of twin, semi-automatic pistols. There isn’t anything special about them. Function over fashion, this time. 

Favorite Knife Collection - Kept in a nice, rolled leather case where everything has its place. These are actually special - sharp, custom-made, finished matte. For a variety of very specific, potentially on-the-go uses. 

starting ability: None.

starting item: Favorite Knife Collection

extra: 

Given the fact that comics are very varied and fluctuate, my portrayal of Roman takes and combines aspects of canon sources from all over with headcanon I’ve built over the past 5 years. Please ask me about it. 

My Roman is deaf and immunocompromised. He needs medical treatment actively and will be using the hospitals/care facilities actively. 

Oh also, he is afraid of most animals (mammals and mammal adjacent specifically) especially raccoons and dogs. 

He doesn’t remember he died yet. Waiting for something to trigger that one :) 

discord id: BLACK MASK#3488

passcode: used to rb fanart of this guy a lot when i was a kid also this was incredibly funny to me while processing this app

#xc application #mun: thysto #exo cosmia

[clairethecutepup]

Daily Log: 2/23/2023

Paragraphs ahead: Creative Works, Digimon World: Next Order...

Whoops, forgot to make an update yesterday, as I was too busy focusing on finishing the fourth page of Puppy Eyes and Doll Eyes (link). Hoo boy, I even stayed up an extra bit of time to get it done. Well, in my defense, they do say that between 10 p.m. and 11 p.m. is ideal for people my age-- especially on terms of heart health. Yet, maybe I should focus on just going to bed when my body is tired, despite what supposed health experts/researchers say.

Speaking of Puppy Eyes and Doll Eyes, I can't wait to work on the next page for that, as it takes a little more comforting of a turn. I love my comfort pieces, whether it's characters making amends or general moments of closeness; although, it's definitely gonna be the former in this case. I know, it's weird to imagine Sarah and Jimmy suddenly being nice to Claire after the crap they just put her through, but sometimes people have those moments of realizing they might've gone too far and try to make amends. It's not like they have a completely guilt-ridden 180 in their personalities, it's more like: "*sigh* Okay, we're sorry..." while getting the pup to quiet/calm down.

Think of it like when your older siblings decide it'd be funny/fun to be mean in some way-- teasing, a little rough play, etc. --but then they begin to see that maybe it wasn't actually as "harmless" as thought, or how it ended up going beyond simple "messing with" shenanigans. Or, maybe you were the older family member that had the realization after something you did. So, there's at least a silver lining and happier end in store for the comic.

But for right now, it's time to re-work on the final chapter to Getting Your Goat (link to first part). Then, we'll see what original project will follow after, whether it's another Claire's Companions "episode" or otherwise.

In other news, Digimon World: Next Order is finally available on Steam/PC! I'll admit, I'm a bit uneased by the $60 price tag, especially when I've heard complaints about controlling the game (ex: no instructions on how to play it with a keyboard); but I have been looking forward to it! Honestly, the addition of a "run" button-- FINALLY! --should be all the convincement I need to go ahead and buy it at the full price.

#Digimon World is finally here! #work progress #next course of action #personal life #updates

[100yearoldcomics]

June 18, 1922 The Gumps by Sid Smith

TOP PANEL [ID: The Gumps stand assembled on a dock by the oceanside (from left to right, an unidentified old woman, Uncle Bim, Min and Andy). Andy & Min excitedly wave handkerchiefs to greet a returning Chester, who stands on the bow of a Viking longship loaded down with bags of money. Several boats towed behind the ship also carry multiple heavy sacks of money. /end] Old Woman: I knew he'd make good. He always was a smart boy. Bim: It takes a Gump every time. Andy: Come on, Chester!

MAIN COMIC [ID: Andy sits on his armchair, reading the paper. Behind him, Min stands holding a small bath towel and a bar of soap. Chester stands in front of her, wailing in a tantrum. /end] Chester: I don't want to take a bath. I'm going to run away from home. That's what I'm going to do. I don't want to stay here any more. Andy: Well, Mama, pack up his grip. If he wants to leave, it's a good thing for him. He's big enough to make his own way in the world.

[ID: Min gleefully packs a suitcase for the weeping Chester, who holds one hand up to his crying eyes and one to his knotted stomach. Andy stands to the side, overseeing things. /end] Min: All right, you can go if that's all you care for your Papa and Mama. I'll pack up your clothes and get you a nice lunch. Andy: Don't put in any bath towels, Mama. He won't need them. Just put in that little red sweater of his and that old flannel shirt. Chester: I will run away from home. That's what I'll do.

[ID: Min hands a brown paper package to Chester. Andy holds the suitcase behind her. /end] Chester: I'm going way away from here. I never will come back, either. Andy: Chester, if you find time, drop me a souvenir postal card from the different places you visit. Send me one of the Cathedral at Rome. I haven't one of those.

[ID: Chester stands in the doorway, carrying the suitcase in his left hand and wearing a hat. Min kneels in front of him to tie his necktie. Andy stands behind her, holding his umbrella. /end] Andy: Traveling is a wonderful education, especially when you're walking. You see everything. Chester: You'll never see me again.

[ID: Andy and Min stand in the doorway, seeing Chester off on his journey. Andy motions to give the umbrella to him as Chester stands sadly on the front steps. /end] Andy: Here, take this umbrella. You might need it. You've got to keep the water off yourself, you know. And if you go through Bloomington, stop and see Dr. Tom Smith. Tell him you know me. Have him look at your teeth. You've got to keep them good and sharp. You're not going to eat sponge cake from now on, you know.

[ID: Chester walks to the front gate and looks both ways down the sidewalk. Andy and Min watch from the open front doorway behind him. /end] Andy: If you get married while you're away, always remember that your wife is as welcome here as the flowers in May. Bring her home with you and if you have any children, don't bathe them. They might get pneumonia. Min: Don't forget to write, Chester.

[ID: Chester warily walks down the sidewalk, toting his luggage as he sniffs sadly. /end]

[ID: He rounds a corner and turns to look back, tears streaming down his face. An arrow labels him "around the corner, just out of sight of the old homestead." /end] Chester: I'll show them. They'll be sorry when I'm gone.

[ID: Chester drops everything and buries his weeping face in the crook of his elbow. /end] Chester: Boo! Hoo!! Hoo!!! I don't want to take a bath.

[ID: Andy pokes his head around the corner to see his wailing son. /end] Chester: Boo! Hoo! Hoo!! Mama! Papa!!

[ID: Andy takes Chester and carries him over his shoulders as he carries the child and his luggage back home. /end] Andy: There, there. You're tired. You've traveled too much. Have much trouble getting through Russia? Chester: Boo, hoo! Hoo. I don't want to go away.

[ID: Andy gets back inside the house and hands the weeping Chester to Min. /end] Min: My mama's boy. Never mind, Mama's sweetheart. Mama loves you. Andy: The traveler has returned. Here, Mama, is your big boy. Look how he's grown Let him use my razor. He wants to shave himself and he wants to take a bath before he goes to bed. He's all dirty from traveling.

#newspaper comics #vintage #history #1922 #the gumps #transcript available #1920s #child raising #bathtime #runaway #running away from home

[furiouskettle]

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 ||  

A quill’s useless without ink, after all.

Thank you so much for reading!!!

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#inscryption spoilers #inscryption #blood tw #self harm tw #comic #Grimora inscryption #grimora #Leshy inscryption #iron crypt #kiwidoodles #HUZZAH IT IS DONE #SCREEEEECH #i love comics but hOO BOY DO THEY TAKE A WHILE TO MAKE

[joyflameball]

So what exactly is be more chill? Curious (also ramble all you want I love it).

AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA JOIN ME IN BRAINROT HELL THIS FANDOM IS DEAD AND I WILL REVIVE IT OR I WILL FUCKING TRY THROUGH MY HYPERFIXATION OR SO HELP ME

Short version: Local twink with bi swag from New Jersey, Jeremy Heere, eats a tiny computer to be chill and date a girl. A literal chill pill. Computer is now in brain. Cue gay angst, boyf riends, arson, bisexuality, and me having a specific type of favorite character.

Long version: Hoo boy. Prepare for me to scream over gay rights, analyze the fuck out of Jeremy Heere, and sob my eyes out over Michael Mell. I’m not putting this under the cut because I want to recruit people to the fandom because it’s dead and I will bring it to life. Fuck you.

Be More Chill is about a teenager named Jeremy who is a horny bastard with not cis swag. No one’s completely sure WHAT his gender is, but he sure as hell ain’t cis. He is all the genders. He is none of the genders. He has the same gender as Link Legend Of Zelda

The opening number, More Than Survive (WHICH, TO MUSIC NERD OUT, NOT ONLY INTRODUCES US TO OUR WORLD BUT ALSO DOUBLES AS JEREMY’S I-WANT SONG MAKING IT MUSICALLY STRONGER THAN MAJORITY OF THE DISNEY RENAISSANCE FILMS, IF YOU NEED MORE ON THAT SIDEWAYS HAS A GREAT VIDEO, IT’S ABOUT A GOOFY MOVIE AND TALKS ABOUT SONGS AND PURPOSE AND MUSICALS AND SHIT, WATCH IT) introduces Jeremy pretty well, here’s the beginning lyrics because I’m not good at explaining shit

Anyway we meet Chloe, Brooke, and Jenna, we’re not talking about them all you need to know is I do not like Chloe fuck Chloe all my homies hate Chloe. Anyway we meet Rich, he writes “boyf” on Jeremy’s backpack you’ll understand later, we’re quickly introduced to Jake, I don’t remember a ton about Rich and Jake but I think they’re gay, and then we meet MY KIN MY BELOVED, CHRISTINE CANIGULA. IF YOU FORGOT HER NAME WAS CHRISTINE, DON’T WORRY, BECAUSE IT’S SAID SO MANY TIMES IT’S COMICAL. I LOVE HER.

Christine points out that someone wrote Boyf on Jeremy’s backpack and he just fuckin RUNS this show is a comedic masterpiece and also what fucking time period does this show take place in because the slang is all over the place this is a good thing but fuck all that because then we meet the BEST CHARACTER in the ENTIRE SHOW

MICHAEL MELL YOU ARE A NATIONAL TREASURE YOU ARE SERATONIN INCARNATE YOU MAY KNOW HIM FROM THE MENTAL BREAKDOWN SONG BUT THAT IS COMPLETELY IRRELEVANT I RECOMMEND YOU GO LISTEN TO THE ACTUAL SONG (MORE THAN SURVIVE NOT THE BREAKDOWN SONG THAT’S FOR LATER) JUST LISTEN TO HOW FUCKIN HAPPY MICHAEL SOUNDS OR IF YOU JUST WANNA HEAR MICHAEL BE HAPPY HERE’S THE CLIP CHERISH HIS HAPPINESS

Michael is a fan favorite, and THERE’S NO QUESTION WHY. Like, you know that one person who's just so enthusiastic and radiates such positive vibes that they cheer you up just by existing? There are three people I know like that, and they're my best friend, Sonic Wachowski, and Michael Mell. Coincidentally all three of them need therapy but that is completely irrelevant

Anyway Michael’s the best character in the show he’s a stoner he likes vintage stuff he buys slushies from 7-11 I think that in one production of the show it was mentioned he has two moms also he has a rainbow patch on his sleeve AND WE KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS AND THAT’S RELVANT BECAUSE APPARENTLY RICH WROTE “RIENDS” ON MICHAEL’S BACKPACK SO WHEN JEREMY AND MICHAEL STAND NEXT TO EACH OTHER IT SAYS BOYF RIENDS AND IT’S SO FUNNYJHDKJFHGDSHGFS

LOVE WINS LOVE FUCKING WINS THAT’S NOT EVEN HOW GAY THEY ARE LIKE IN THIS SONG JEREMY WENT FROM “Hate not dating anyone ever” TO “HOLY SHIT MICHAEL :D” AND HE’S JUST BOPPIN TO THE MUSIC WHILE MICHAEL SINGS GOD THEY’RE SO IN LOVE BASICALLY EVERY SCENE THEY’RE IN YOU COULD EASILY PUT “LIVE SLUG REACTION” OVER IT THEY ARE LIVING IN MY BRAIN THEY WILL NOT LEAVE OR PAY RENT I AM GONNA GO NUTS OVER THEM LOOK AT THEM THEY’RE IN LOVE

Anyway Christine signs up for the school play and Jeremy’s like “KNOW WHAT I THINK SHE’S CUTE I’M GONNA SIGN UP FOR THE SCHOOL PLAY” and MIchael’s just being the ultimate wingman I love him so much (at one point before Jeremy goes to the play rehersal he’s like “YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO THIS. OF COURSE I’LL MOCK YOU FOREVER IF YOU DON’T.” it’s so funny i love him)

We officially meet Christine and she’s so fucking neurodivergent and it’s amazing, she’s got gigantic feelings about living up to all she’s meant to be and at one point she rants about roles for women in theatre and it’s so fucking funny I kin her intensely <3 (side note when we meet her jeremy’s like “is this where you meet for the play rehersal” and christine’s like “no this is where you meet for the swim team. i’m joking i’m joking” and jeremy’s like “oH WELL I’M JEREMY” and it’s so fucking funny jeremy is so fucking dumb i love him so much) Btw Jake exists but I’m not hyperfixated on him fuck you his parents laundered money now they’re on the run that doesn’t really come into play tho maybe I haven’t watched the musical in ages and probably have ADHD fjdhhfhsdfjsd

Anyway we see Rich again and he’s a little shit and also short (he calls Jeremy “tallass” and Jeremy’s like “WHY DO YOU CALL ME THAT I’M NOT EVEN THAT TALL” fun fact michael’s taller than jeremy which i love so much) (ALSO APPARENTLY RICH IS ONLY 5′5??? THAT’S NOT THAT SHORT??? IS EVERYONE IN THIS SCHOOL JUST 5′10 SHFGJGSHFNHCSBDH) but Rich is confident as hell AND THEN HE FUCKING GASPS LIKE HE’S BEEN PUNCHED IN THE GUT AND THEN HE’S LIKE “HEY. HEY JEREMY MY MAN. DID YOU KNOW THAT IN FRESHMAN YEAR I WAS A LOSER LIKE YOU. YOU WANNA KNOW HOW I STOPPED BEING A LOSER.”

He proceeds to talk about a fuckin thing called a Squip, you can’t even look it up on the internet, it’s a very fun word to say, it’s from Japan, it’s a grey oblong pill, quantum nanotechnology CPU, the quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until it implants in your brain and tells you what to do

Jeremy’s like “SO IT’S DRUGS???” And Rich is like IT’S BETTER THAN DRUGS YOU PIECE OF SHIT STONER IT’S FROM JAPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN IT’S A GREY OBLONG PILL QUANTUM PILL QUANTUM NANOTECHNOLOGY CPUUU THEEE QUANTUM COMPUTER IN THE PILL WILL TRAVEL THROUGH YOUR BLOOD UNTIL IT IMPLANTS IN YOUR BRAIN AND IT TELLS YOU WHAT TO DOOOOOO IT TELLS YOU WHAT TO DOOOOOOOOOO IT’S PREPROGRAMMED IT’S AMAZING SPEAKS TO YOU DIRECTLYYYYYYY YOU BEHAVE AS IY’S APPRAISING HELPS YOU ACT CORRECTLYYYYYYY (Squip homophobic) HEEELPS YOOUU TOOO BEEE COOOOOOOOOOOOOL IT HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELPS YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULE THIS SONG SLAPS SO HARD

Rich keeps pitching the Squip how if Jeremy takes his advice and if he pays the listed prince then you’ll go from sad from interesting to hip yeah your whole life will flip when you have a squip this song slaps so hard and you can get a Squip for the low price of six hundred dollars and then Rich fucking RIFFS TO INSANITY  HEYY YEAAH A SQUIIIIIIIIP HEEEEYEAH A SQUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP HEY YEAH NO LONGER A DRIP WHEN YOU GOT IN YOUR GRIP A SQUIIP A SQUIIIIIIP A SQUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIP THIS SONG HAS NO RIGHT TO GO SO HARD

Anyway this next scene is one I like to call WOA... GAYMERS (YEAH MICHAEL’S BACK CHERISH EVERY BIT OF SCREENTIME HE GETS BECAUSE HE REALLY NEEDED MORE) SO BASICALLY IT’S A SONG WHERE MICHAEL AND JEREMY ARE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES TOGETHER AND IT’S SO FUCKING CUTE

SO AFTER THE BEGINNING VERSE MICHAEL’S LIKE “YEAH SO RICH IS DEF SCAMMING YOU. SUPER WEIRDLY.” AND JEREMY’S LIKE “BUT WHAT IF HE’S NOT THO, ALL I HAVE TO DO IS BRING THE GUY WHO BULLIES ME SIX HUNDRED DOLLARS OKAY YEAH HE’S SCAMMING ME I’M DOOMED TO BE A LOSER UNTIL THE END OF TIME AND BEYOND” AND MICHAEL’S LIKE “NO WAY NO FUCKING WAY HERE IS WHY YOU ARE WRONG” AND SAYS HE’S COOLER THAN A VINTAGE CASSETTE AND SAYS THAT HIGH SCHOOL BEING SHIT ISN’T A BIG DEAL BECAUSE THEY’RE A TEAM AND IT’S SO CUTE I LOVE YOU MICHAEL MELL JEREMY ALSO LOVES YOU BUT ROMANTICALLY

This song does highlight some differences between Michael and Jeremy that come into play later. The biggest one I take away from it is that Michael’s more... patient than Jeremy. Michael knows he and Jeremy are losers, but Michael owns it, partially because he is sure that in two years, once he and Jeremy get to collage, they’re gonna be cool. In his own words, “guys like us are cool in collage.” Jeremy, on the other hand, doesn’t want to wait for collage to possibly be cool. He feels, in his own words, “stuck on a level, and I wanna move on.” He wants to be cool now, Michael is fine with waiting.

An additional note: we learn in this song that Jeremy’s mom just. Left. And since then, his dad has been depressed as hell. Jeremy probably has a LOT of pent up emotions about the whole thing (”You heard from her?” “No. And who cares? It’s like, Mom moved on, why can’t he?”).

BUT FUCK THAT BECAUSE AT ONE POINT JEREMY’S AFOREMENTIONED DAD COMES IN AND SAYS, AND I QUOTE “IS THAT A GIRL? ARE YOU IN HERE WITH A GIRL? OH HI MICHAEL” WHICH. FHSDHNFHDSBHBJS EVERYONE KNOWS THEY’RE IN LOVE RICH KNOWS JEREMY’S DAD KNOWS THE ONLY ONE WHO DOESN’T KNOW IS THE IDIOTS THEMSELVES

ANYWAY MICHAEL IS ESTABLISHED TO HAVE ABANDONMENT ISSUES BECAUSE JEREMY’S LIKE “YO WE DON’T HAVE TO GIVE THE MONEY TO RICH WE COULD JUST GO TO HIS BUYER AND SEE IF IT CHECKS OUT” AND MICHAEL’S LIKE “IF IT DOES WILL YOU BE TOO COOL FOR UH FOR VIDEO GAMES” AND THEN THERE’S THIS

THAT’S GAY THAT’S SO FUCKING GAY THEY’RE SO IN LOVE I’M SO NORMAL OVER THEM OH OH OH AND I’M P SURE THERE’S A VERSION OF THE SONG WHERE THE LYRIC IS “HIGH SCHOOL’S PERVERSE BUT WITHOUT YOU IT’D BE SO MUCH WORSE” WHICH IS SO MUCH GAYER

ANYWAY THE SONG ENDS AFTER ONE LAST REPEAT OF THE CHORUS (THE CHORUS FORESHADOWS THINGS I WILL NOT ELABORATE) AND YOU END WITH THE IMPRESSION THAT WOW. THEY’RE GAY.

Side note let’s talk about how fucking stupid Jeremy and Michael are because I find it hilarious. Jeremy really went “WELP NO ONE WANTS TO FUCK ME, GUESS I’LL EAT A FUCKIN COMPUTER” and Michael was like “WELL IF WE TAKE THE MONEY TO NOT OUR BULLY AND JEREMY WON’T BE TOO COOL FOR UH VIDEO GAMES I SEE NOTHING ELSE WRONG WITH THIS PLAN” like they both agreed “Ah yes, eating a shady computer from Japan that implants in your brain and tells you what to do is a completely rational idea” and it was only later that they went “Waaiit a minute. Maybe eating a supercomputer from Japan that can't be looked up on the internet that we bought in the back of a shoe store for 400 dollars in cash that the dealer said 'wasn't exactly legal'. Was a bad idea." they’re both fuckign stupid I love them so much

Anyway Jeremy and Michael go and get the Squip which looks like a Tictac, and they learn they gotta take it with Mountain Dew. Don’t ask why. So next day, Jeremy takes the squip and it is inneffective and he’s like “i wasted my bar mitzvah money on a wintergreen tictac (side note this confirms he’s jewish!) leave me to mourn in my chili fries forever” and then eternal ray of sunshine Michael Mell’s like “OKAY I’LL BE BACK IN FIVE MINUTES BECAUSE I AM GOING TO GET SOMETHING CALLED CRYSTAL PEPSI. IT’S LIKE REGULAR PEPSI. JUST CLEAR.” AND HE’S SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT IT ESPECIALLY THE FACT THAT IT WAS DISCONTINUED IN THE 90S (hehe chekhov’s gun) HE IS NEURODIVERGENT I WOULD KILL AND DIE FOR HIM

Anyway in the next scene Jeremy tries talking to Christine and then he fuckgn dies

So basically Jeremy has a bit of a seizure and the squip turns out to have worked all along and it looks like Keanu Reaves for A Reason. What is that reason? FUCK YOU IT’S FUNNY (AND THE SQUIP’S BRIEFLY LIKE “KEANU REAVES IS MY DEFAULT MODE YOU CAN ALSO SET ME FOR: SEAN CONNERY. JACK NICKELSON. SEXY ANIME FEMALE UHUHU” THAT IS A DIRECT QUOTE AND IT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY I LOVE THIS MUSICAL)

ANYWAY THERE’S A SONG WHERE THE SQUIP’S AN ASSHOLE AND FUCKING MENTALLY RIPS INTO JEREMY UNDER THE GUISE OF “HELPING HIM.” I’M GONNA KILL IT. LIKE IT TELLS JEREMY THAT “EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU IS SO TERRIBLE, EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU MAKES ME WANNA DIE” JESUS FUCKING CHRIST (at least there’s a bit of the song that’s so very stim so don’t freak out and don’t resist and have no doubt if i assist youu wiiiiiiill be more chill it is so stim)

ALSO THE SQUIP CASTS LIKE. A HALLUCINATION THING???? WHERE ALL THE STUDENTS REINFORCE TO JEREMY THAT EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM SUCKS AND EVERYONE HATES HIM ACTUALLY WHERE THE FUCK IS MICHAEL WE NEED HIM TO SMACK THE SQUIP IN THE FACE WITH MOUNTAIN DEW RED

(I just wanna share this post because it’s so fucking funny and also gay rights, also here’s an animatic of that song, the ending has implications but dON’T WORRY MICHAEl’S COMPLETELY FINE AND OKAY AND ALIVE)

The Squip tells Jeremy to wear an Eminem shirt, we briefly see Chloe and Brooke again, we get Jeremy being an awkward dramatic dork I love him, and there’s a song that makes your local sex repulsed ace who is also a lesbian in love with Brooke Lohst Very Mentally Confused so let’s ignore that and also its later reprise because the later reprise is just. Bad. Not musically it’s just so uncomfortable and i hate it so much so no <3 Anyway we haven’t seen Michael in a while weird haha I’m sure it’s nothing <3 Squip says Michael left the mall it must be the truth <3

Anyway we get a reprise to the song where the Squip was an emotionally abusive asshole (strong wording, but correct), and here we see ITS RIPPING INTO JEREMY FUCKING WORKED. Because the Squip repeats the “Everything about you is so terrible, everything about you makes me wanna die" thing, and Jeremy echoes, saying everything about him is so terrible, everything about him makes him wanna die (Michael was totally yelling at Jeremy “HERE IS AN ALPHEBETICAL LIST OF ALL THE REASONS YOU ARE WRONG HEY HEY CAN YOU HEAR ME” :)). The Squip’s manipulations have worked, leaving Jeremy in the perfect condition to obey its every command who wants to kill a tictac with me

(Anyway here’s an animatic of THAT song because it’s GREAT)

Anyway next day the Squip kinkshames Jeremy and decides he’s gonna do pushups (because i have boyf riends brainrot here is a headcanon related to that because them) and then we get a ballad from Christine where she talks about how there’s this guy she passes in the halls every day, and she thought she’d had him clocked but now something’s different about him, and he’s gone from a GUY THAT YOU’D NEVER BE INTO INTO A GUY THAT YOU’D KINDA BE INTO FROM A GUY THAT I’D NEVER BE INTO INTO A GUY THAT I’D KINDA BE INTO IS HE WORTH IT JEREMYYYYYYYYYYYYY I DON’T ALWAYS RELATE TO OTHER PEOPLE MY AGE EXCEPT WHEN I’M ON THE STAGE AND THERE ARE SO MANY CHANGED THAT I’M GOING THROUGH AND WHY’M I TELLING THIS TO YOU GUESS THERE’S A PART OF ME THAT WANTS TO (uwu) I GUESS A PART OF ME WANTS TO WHO KNEW I GUESS THAT PART OF ME WANTS TO SIT WITH YOU I GUESS THAT PART OF ME WANTS TO WHO KNEW I GUESS THAT PART OF ME LIKES TO TALK TO YOU I GUESS THAT PART OF ME LIKES TO WHOOO KNEW I GUESS THAT PART O FME LIKES TO HANG WITH YOU I GUESS THAT PART OF ME- BACK TO PLAY REHERSAL, I KNOW THAT IT’S WEIRD, BUT IT’S TOTALLY TRUE... THE GUY THAT I’D KINDA BE INTO... (that guy that you’d kinda be into) YEAH THAT GUY THAT I’D KINDA BE INTO IIIIIIIIS...

JAKE

YEAH IN A SLIGHTLY UNEXPECTED TWIST, CHRISTINE’S INTO JAKE AND NOT JEREMY. FUN.

So the Squip’s like “Aight if you wanna be with Christine you gotta reboot your reputation you gotta get an upgrade (UPGRADE) upgrade okay not yet

So the Squip makes Jeremy cry because it can automatically do that apparently, Brooke shows up and comforts Jeremy, and then we learn EMINEM IS FUCKING DEAD AND JEREMY’S LIKE “SQUIP DID DID YOU kILL EMINEM” AND IT HAS THE SAME ENERGY AS “DID YOU FUCK MY WIFE” THIS SHOW IS A COMEDIC MASTERPIECE, ANYWAY THE SQUIP DIDN’T EXACTLY KILL EMINEM, and then we get a BANGER SONG CALLED UPGRADE AND IT FUCKING SLAPS

UPGRADE IS BASICALLY JUST THE SQUIP BEING LIKE HEY JEREMY YOUR LIFE WAS SO PITIFUL BEFORE BUT NOW IT’S TIME TO GO ALL THE WAY AND MORE YOU GOTTA GET AN UPGRADE UPGRADE UPGRADE GOTTA GET AN UPGRADE UPGRADE UPGRADE DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE GUILT YOU FEEL (sus) JUST TAKE A BREATHE AND SEAL THE DEAL DAMN GOTTA GET AN UPGRAAAAAAAAAADE YOU GOTTA GET AN UPGRAAAAAAAAAAA-A-AAAADE

Anyway Jake kinda asks Christine to hang out at his place, the Squip keeps egging Jeremy on, then Jeremy’s like “OKAY THERE ARE TOO MANY VOICES IN MY HEAD RN CAN EVERYONE JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE AND LET ME THINK. INCLUDING YOU YOU FUCKIN TICTAC.” So the Squip fucks off (not for long unfortunately)

And then, for the first time in a while, we see Michael, and he’s. Kinda pissed at Jeremy, saying he’s been “avoiding him all day”. Jeremy’s confused as fuck and then realizes HE HASN’T SEEN MICHAEL SINCE THE SQUIP ACITVATED, so he’s like “HEY SQUIP WHY HAVEN’T I SEEN MICHAEL SINCE YOU SHOWED UP” and the Squip reveals it’s something called optic nerve blocking. It has control over Jeremy’s vision, so it has been blocking Michael from Jeremy. He’s a link to “Jeremy 1.0″, so if Jeremy wants to upgrade, he’s gotta make sacrifices. Squip homophobic

Michael realizes what happened - the squip worked. And god he just. Fuckin LIGHTS UP AND HE’S SO EXCITED ABOUT IT HE’S LIKE “JEREMY THAT’S AMAZING WE GOTTA TEST IT OUT WE GOTTA CELEBRATE WE GOTTA WE GOTTA GET STONED IN MY BASEMENT” AND HE’S SO EXCITED AND HAPPY WHICH MAKES WHAT HAPPENS NEXT SO VERY PAINFUL

Now Upgrade has a last verse where Jeremy makes his choice, but it was replaced with a new song in the Broadway version that I find MUCH better so I’m gonna talk about that specifically, it’s called Loser Geek Whatever, and holy shit it’s so good and heartbreaking oh my god I need to highlight specific lyrics just to show you how good it is

“It’s not only school that’s rough, being lonely’s stupid tough” and “The problem has always been me” those lyrics specifically affect me on an emotional level that I can’t explain like ow fuck I feel that so much being lonely is the worst fuckign feeling in the entire world

Alright gay people get ready for the promised Jeremy analysis

This song serves as a deeper dive into Jeremy’s mind, a stronger I-want song than More Than Survive. More Than Survive works well enough, but it doesn’t go SUPER in depth about Jeremy’s wants and motivations. More Than Survive is just... Surface-level wants. Jeremy’s surface level want and motivation is he wants to be with Christine and not get targeted by bullies and shit, and that’s shown very clearly through More Than Survive.

Meanwhile Loser Geek Whatever goes right to the root of Jeremy’s issues - he’s really fucking lonely. His self esteem is in the ground. His entire life, he’s been nothing but a failure. A weirdo. A loser. His life fucking sucks. And his mom leaving (as mentioned earlier) probably didn’t make anything better.

Something I find VERY interesting is that Jeremy thinks his instincts and his free will has made his life SUCK. So he’s giving it up for a chance - for a chance - at having something different. And that is FASCINATING to me. LIke... Jeremy’s giving up who he really is and his free will to conform to what the Squip says is best for him to be “cool.” Like that is terrifying, but... Understandable and strangely real, in a way.

Now this might just be my aromanticism and not knowing what crushes are like talking, but Jeremy’s loneliness might contribute to why he wants Christine so bad (aside from just teenage crush things).

Jeremy wants human connection. He wants more friends aside from just Michael. Michael’s amazing, but can’t really... Understand Jeremy’s loneliness. Michael absolutely ADORES being weird. He owns it, he loves it. He doesn’t (openly) care a lot about the social consequences of being weird, he's good with just vibing and having a good time playing video games with his best friend. As long as he’s got Jeremy, he’s good. 

Meanwhile, Jeremy cares a LOT about social consequences, and he kinda resents being weird. Being weird keeps him as just a forgettable blip at the bottom of the school social map. Sure, he’s free to be himself, but at what cost? Being bullied, made fun of? Being the loser? He doesn’t want that anymore. He feels forgotten, isolated, and alone. Freaking out is his okay, and it sucks. There’s a huge disconnect between Jeremy and Michael’s mindsets - Michael loves being weird, Jeremy doesn’t. Michael is patient enough to wait until collage to be cool, Jeremy isn’t.

Side note. The lyric “I’m ready, set, I’m player one” hurts specifically because it has been confirmed that. When Michael and Jeremy play video games. Michael always is Player One.

So you see where this is going.

You see what Jeremy’s choice is gonna be.

Doesn’t make it hurt any less.

NOW I’M GONNA SAY QUICKLY - UPGRADE FUCKING SLAPS, BUT THE ENTIRETY OF LGW IS, IN MY HUMBLE OPINION, BETTER THAN THE LAST VERSE OF UPGRADE WHERE HE MAKES HIS CHOICE. LET ME JUST SHOW YOU THE LAST VERSE OF UPGRADE. THE ENTIRE LAST VERSE OF UPGRADE.

...Yeah it’s not as good imo. Maybe I’m biased because I saw the Broadway version first, because there are no bootlegs of the Two River recording, but I still think Loser Geek Whatever is WAY better than the end of Upgrade.

In Upgrade, Jeremy is COMPLETELY certain that yeah, he’s gonna do this no matter what. Which. SIR. YOU ARE CUTTING OFF YOUR BEST FRIEND???? YOU DON’T JUST SOUND COLD AND CERTAIN AT THAT???? And all the interesting stuff that Loser Geek Whatever talked about - Jeremy giving up his free will, Jeremy’s loneliness, Jeremy’s guilt that he brushes off because the Squip’s better at making choices for him - is BARELY talked about.

In Loser Geek Whatever, we get context to Jeremy choosing to abandon Michael. Jeremy hates feeling weird, Michael loves it. Jeremy actually thinks “If I get everything I want, am I gonna be able to act like I didn’t hurt my one real friend?" But he excuses it with the thought that all his instincts have gotten him into trouble alone, all his thoughts have made him worse, so if the Squip thinks that cutting Michael off is the best decision... Well, what’s smarter and better at making decisions? A supercomputer who knows basically everything in the entire world, or a weird, awkward, nerdy loser who’s only fucked up with every choice he’s ever made?

In Loser Geek Whatever, Jeremy’s choice comes off as something he’s not entirely certain of, but the Squip is better at making choices than he is, and the Squip’s been right all the time so far, so if it wants him to abandon Michael... That’s what’s best, right? Yes, it’s selfish, but Jeremy’s been the loser all his life and he hates it. He wants- no, needs something to change. His status quo sucks, and he can’t just wait two years for them to be cool in collage for something new. Plus... Easier to pretend it didn’t happen if he can’t see Michael. Easier to just reap the rewards if he can’t see the consequences.

Meanwhile in Upgrade, it just comes off as. A huge dick move. Which it is, it is objectively a huge dick move. But it’s a more UNDERSTANDABLE dick move that has some EXPLANATION in Loser Geek Whatever. Jeremy’s decision has NUANCE.

And ALSO this is shown REALLY WELL through just the delivery of “Optic nerve blocking on” so lemme ramble about that real quick

So Two River Jeremy was played by Will Connolly and Broadway Jeremy was played by Will Roland, they're both great in the role, but here I think that Roland’s delivery of the line was better. In Connolly’s delivery, his voice is more... Cold. There’s no real emotion behind it, just certainty. Which I’ve yelled about why that’s not a good choice. But in Roland’s delivery, Jeremy’s voice is breaking and shaky. He doesn’t sound like he wants to do it. It’s fucking heartbreaking it gets me so bad

Anyway that’s the end of Act One, I do not remember everything after this just moments that wounded my soul jdshfanjfghjdgasjcd

So there’s a Halloween party that’s in every Broadway high school there’s always a fucking Halloween party or some kinda party, it’s pretty standard, ONE THING I WILL NOTE: Rich shows up, and he’s looking for something called Mountain Dew Red. He is VERY DESPERATE to find some Mountain Dew Red. Like, HE IS CLEARLY NOT OKAY. Anyway I’m sure that will not come into play ever

Then there’s the Reprise To That Song That Makes Me Uncomfortable LET’S IGNORE THAT HAHA SQUIP GOT MESSED UP BY ALCOHOL JEREMY GOT CHASED INTO A BATHROOM AND IS HIDING SURELY NOTHING WILL GO WRONG NOTHING BAD EVER HAPPENS TO BE MORE CHILL CHARACTERS IN BATHROOMS ESPECIALLY WHEN ONE OF THEM IS WEARING A BLACK SHIRT THAT SAYS “CREEPS” WITH GREEN LETTERS HAHAHAHA ANYWAY MICHAEL’S BACK LET’S GO GAYS LET’S GET READY FOR THE MOST EMOTIONALLY CHARGED SCENE IN THE ENTIRE MUSICAL

So yeah. Michael’s back. And he’s not happy. He’s really fucking hurt and kinda pissed at Jeremy. Like, he had a whole speech in his head getting mad at Jeremy (haha i kin you michael. everyone who knows what happens next is now very concerned anyway). Jeremy’s like “damn. I missed you.” Also at one point Michael’s like “You’re speechless. Squip got your tongue?” which I just like that line a lot and also it leads to Jeremy being like “No it’s off” AND THEN MICHAEL’S LIKE “That explains why you’re talking to me” OW THIS POOR KID

So Michael talks about the Squip, and how he’s done a lot of research on it, and points out how it’s REALLY FUCKING WEIRD how there’s NOTHING ON THE INTERNET about it. Like, what’s not on the internet? (a full video bootleg of the two river cast of be more chill that’s what jdshfjhds) So eventually, Michael found a story from a dude he was playing Warcraft with, and how that guy’s brother went from a straight D student to going to Harvard. Next thing that happened to him? WELL HE’S IN A MENTAL HOSPITAL! HE “WENT NUTS”! JESUS CHRIST!

Michael starts calling out how SHADY the whole Squip thing is (Michael Mell my wonderful gaymer you helped him get the fucking squip <3 I stand by my headcanon that they’re both stupid as fuck they have one braincell between them they usually have half each Michael just has the whole braincell at this moment in time). How it’s weird how you can’t look it up on the internet, how it’s weird how it was just floating around in New Jersey... I mean, it’s an extremely advanced supercomputer. There’s so much they don’t know about it. Who made them? How did it get here? How do they know what it’s really doing to Jeremy? What it’s doing to his head?

And Jeremy really does not want to hear it. The Squip has helped him. The Squip gave him one small chance, one small bit of luck, a chance to escape the hell of being easily forgotten, at the bottom of the school hierarchy, and there’s no way he’s gonna let it go. He does not want to go back to being the loser.

He deflects, saying Michael’s just jealous, he’s just pissed Jeremy has one. You know, the universe owed him one. High school has been hell, he deserves to be able to go through life without worry. And sure, maybe some guy’s squip drove him crazy, but there is no guarantee that’ll happen to him!!

And then Michael reveals that it wasn’t the Squip that drove him crazy.

He went crazy trying to get it out.

There’s a moment of silence, before Jeremy says that he knows it won’t happen to him then, because why would he wanna remove the Squip?

Jeremy tries to leave, but Michael steps in front of him. Jeremy tells him to move. Michael asks what he’ll do if he doesn’t.

Six words later, Michael’s mental state shatters. Six words later, Jeremy is back with the partygoers. Six words later, Michael is alone.

With that, Jeremy leaves Michael in the bathroom by himself.

Leading to the BEST FUCKING SONG in the ENTIRE MUSICAL. That isn’t a controversial statement, either. Someone tells you “Yeah this song is the best in the musical” and basically everyone will agree.

Because for five minutes, the show stops, and gives Michael a GUT PUNCH OF A SONG.

Michael In The Bathroom.

There’s a VERY HIGH CHANCE you’ve at least heard of it. There are LOADS of animatics of it for basically every fandom except Omori which personally angers me but we’re not talking about that WE’RE TALKING ABOUT MICHAEL.

This song. This song gets me. It fucking shattered me and everyone who listens to it. This song takes Michael from “Best friend who got left behind” to “This POOR KID has ABANDONMENT ISSUES and has just been LEFT BEHIND and now he’s having a FUCKING MENTAL BREAKDOWN” BECAUSE YEP! THIS IS THE MENTAL BREAKDOWN SONG! And HOO BOY, is it painful. It is such an EMOTIONAL GUT-PUNCH because up to this point, Michael’s just been a chill guy who got mad at Jeremy for leaving him behind for popularity and an evil tictac, and then the show gives him a fucking I-want song where he completely breaks down and at one point has a sensory overload and then breaks down sobbing and wishes he’d never been born and it fucking hURTS and I just I HAVE TO SHOW YOU THE LYRICS IT IS THE ONLY WAY YOU CAN UNDERSTAND

FUCK

FUCK

To get a bit personal (skip over this paragraph if you don’t wanna read a mini-vent (/nm if you do)): I thought I related to “being lonely’s stupid tough” in Loser Geek Whatever, but then MITB comes on and the second line is “I could stay right here or disappear, and nobody’d even notice at all” and I feel like I’ve been punched in the gut with how much that fucking called me out. It’s part of the reason I personally ADORE this song - because I can’t think of any other songs that have captured my emotions so well. I mean, obviously I haven’t had a friend get a supercomputer implanted in their brain and they started getting more popular and they literally blocked me from their vision so I tried confronting them with my worries and they ignored my concerns and called me a loser and left me behind to have a mental breakdown, but. A lot of times, I do feel really lonely, even when talking to my friends. I feel replaceable and forgettable, like I could be removed from the situation, removed from the group, hell, removed from the world, and no one would notice. No one would care. They’d just continue on with their lives like nothing happened. Like I never existed. And I’m sure I’m not alone. I’m sure that basically everyone has somewhat related to this song at some point.

OKAY TIME FOR ANALYSIS. WELCOME TO MY THERAPY SESSION /HJ

So before we begin, there’s something very cool in the first line that I like, and I’m probably reaching, but here we go: Michael feeling like he could disappear, and no one would notice... KINDA PARALLELS JEREMY.

So in More Than Survive, there are the lyrics “I don’t want to be a hero/Just want to stay in the line”, “I navigate the dangerous hall/Focus on a poster there on the wall/Avoiding any eye contact at all/And trying hard to remain unseen”, and “I’m never gonna be the cool guy/I’m more the one who’s left out/Of all the characters at school/I am not the one who the story’s about”. Just a general theme of feeling forgettable that’s furthered by the Squip Song, where Rich says that on the school social map, Jeremy is “just a blip.” In Be More Chill Part 2, the Squip says “You won’t feel left out or unsure”. Bringing this to Loser Geek Whatever, there’s the lyrics “Think I felt inconsequential/Since middle school began/I knew I had no potential/To be the leading man” and “If Brooke can look me in the eye/Like I’m some normal, handsome guy”. And the themes in LGW of Jeremy being lonely adds to the vibes that Jeremy feels like he could be forgotten and no one would care. And right in this song, Michael says “I could stay right here or disappear/And nobody’d even notice at all”.

These parallels are very interesting. It shows that Michael and Jeremy have the same worst fear - being overlooked, forgotten, isolated, alone. It’s just that Jeremy’s scared of being forgotten by society at large, and Michael’s scared of being forgotten by Jeremy. And Jeremy fights to not feel like that. He fights to not be a blip at the bottom of the school social map. But in doing so, he leaves Michael behind. In his fight to not feel forgotten and isolated and alone, Jeremy feels he must make his best friend feel forgotten and isolated and alone, and that is FASCINATING. Like... BMC’s writing can be weak in places, but in this song (well basically all the scenes with Michael, but this song especially), it fucking hits and it hits hard.

Now moving on to the rest of the song, because that was all from the first two fucking lines.

So, one thing I get from this song is that Michael does not talk about his feelings. At least, not around people. This was shown in Two Player Game (”will you be too cool for... for video games?”), and it’s leaned into more here. “I’ll wait as long as I need, until my face is dry/Or I’ll just blame it on weed or something in my eye.” Hell, even Michael only breaking down in the bathroom, in a private place where no one can see, supports this.

Now for Michael’s sensory overload (the knock-knock-knock-knock part). I love that part so much, and not because it’s stimmy like how I react to most of the little parts of songs I love, but because it feels realistic to me. Feeling like everything’s too loud, too overwhelming, too fast. It’s an awful feeling, and this song captures it perfectly I feel so seen by this song

The way I see the “But I can’t hear knocking anymore” line is that there genuinely was someone knocking and they left, though some people thing it was a hallucination. But whether the knocking was real or not doesn’t really matter. What matters is how Michael interpreted it stopping. And I think that in his wrecked mental state, Michael would interpret someone leaving as “They don’t care. No one cares.” 

Is it logical? Absolutely not. But as someone with anxiety, jealousy, and really bad confirmation bias when it comes to what people think of me, I can easily say that when you’re mentally overloaded with pain and loneliness, logic kinda goes out the window. Confirmation bias can be a bitch, especially when it’s confirmation bias for “Everyone hates me actually.”

Michael’s longing for the past is another very relatable thing. I’m pretty sure everyone is nostalgic for some better time. We’re nostalgic for being able to go outside without needing to wear a mask. We’re nostalgic for being able to talk to our friends face-to-face. We’re nostalgic for fandoms that once burned bright that are now just embers. We’re nostalgic for talking with friends we’ve drifted apart from, laughing and joking and enjoying each others company. We yearn for those times when we felt really, truly happy and content, times that we desperately wish would come back, because we want to recapture that feeling.

God, there’s something for everyone in this song. Something anyone can relate to, because this song is, at its core, about loneliness, and as sad as it is to say, loneliness is a common denominator among every human.

If you haven’t listened to the song and you’re wondering why “And there’s no denying, I’m just-” was cut off. IT WAS BECAUSE MICHAEL BROKE DOWN CRYING. SOMEONE GET HIM THERAPY PLEASE OH MY GOD I JUST WANNA HUG HIM

(A quick note: in More Than Survive Reprise, Jeremy says “All in all, a not too heinous day”. The word choice is interesting, because here, Michael says “This is a heinous night”. Continuing with the parallels - as Jeremy becomes “cool,” Michael’s mental state declines.)

And then the song starts building again, starting with Michael wishing he’d fucking KILLED HIMSELF, and then he fucking completely breaks down, hating himself for everything. For coming to the party. For not just staying home. For being seen as just a stoner. For having no one who knows who he really is. Because no one does know who he is, and they don’t care, either. The only person who knew him, really knew him, was Jeremy, and he’s stabbed him in the back and left him behind. He’s just a fucking loser, all alone, crying in the bathroom, and is there a sadder sight than that?

The way the song ends, along with the line “Michael who you don’t know” in every chorus reinforces that Jeremy was really the only person who knew Michael. He knew all Michael’s interests, he loved playing video games with him, he lit up when he saw him in More Than Survive, he was genuinely disappointed when the Squip said Michael left the mall without him, he picked up on Michael’s worries in Two Player Game and comforted him, he wanted both of them to go buy the Squip together, hell, before he took the Squip, he offered to split the Squip between them. Jeremy was literally the only person at school who really knew and genuinely cared about Michael.

But everyone else?

All you know about him is his name.

(also it’s my personal headcanon that brooke came in sobbing because she got cheated on again (don’t ask) and she and michael vented to each other about how they’re been fucked over by this one specific guy because they should be friends)

Anyway that was the most emotional scene in the entire fucking show, if they’d had cut it out for pacing the show would have been so much worse, it elevated Michael from “I would die for you” to “*slaps roof on michael* YOU CAN FIT SO MUCH ANGST IN THIS KID *sobbing*”, it’s definitely part of why he’s such a fan favorite, it makes him more relatable with all the elements of loneliness, it’s incredible, it’s amazing, please listen to this fucking song

So as much as I’d love to cry over Michael forever, we gotta get to the happy ending so let’s cut back to the main character

Jeremy talks to Christine and they make weird noises together and it’s so fucking cute they’re such neurodivergent dorks, Rich is still looking for Mountain Dew Red, Jeremy asks Christine out and she’s like “Tbh I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship until I know who I am” which SO VALID QUEEN, Squip turns back on and tells Jeremy HE NEEDS TO LEAVE RIGHT THE FUCK NOW, and then the next thing that happens is arson.

So we get a banger of a song called Smartphone Hour that is very stim. So in it, local gossip Jenna Rolan tells Chloe (who. tried to. uh. sleep with jeremy. thus jeremy and brooke broke up because the squip kinda made jeremy date brooke to get popular which was a major dick move i know i brushed over this let’s ignore that i’m too ace for this bullshit) at the party last night, Rich was acting very not okay. Chloe’s like “Damn, Rich really shouldn’t get so high he’s too short for that” (NO ONE LETS RICH FORGET HE’S SHORT DJHFSHFDS) and Jenna’s like “CHLOE. RICH WASN’T DRUNK. I HEARD FROM THIS GUY THAT HE DIDN’T HAVE A FUCKIN DROP OF ALCOHOL. SO OF FULL SOBER MIND... YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT HE DID... YOU REALLY WANNA KNOW.... HERE YOU GO THEN *beat drop* RICH SET A FIRE AND HE BURNED DOWN THE HOUSE WOAAHHH RICH SET A FIRE AND HE BURNED DOWN THE HOUSE WOAAH I THOUGHT I WAS DREAMING EVERYBODY WAS SCREAMING WHEN RICH SET A FIRE AND HE BURNED DOWN THE HOUSE WHEN RICH SET A FIRE AND HE BURNED DOWN THE HOUUUSE”

The news of Rich spreads like wildfire, pun intended. People start acting like they knew Rich and they feel so bad for him, and Be More Chill says enby rights.

Honestly, I really love this song. Yeah, the lyrics are a bit on the nose, but it’s fun as hell and very stim and I like it a lot.

Meanwhile, Jeremy is really starting to question the Squip. Michael’s words clearly stuck in his mind. He asks why the Squip is here. It could be inside presidents, world leaders, and it’s in some high school student? Why? What does it have to gain? Squip’s like “Bro it’s my goal to help you and improve your life” and Jeremy’s like “OH WELL THAT’S WORKED OUT SPLENDID! MY BEST FRIEND HATES ME! I HURT BROOKE! CHRISTINE ISN’T INTO ME!”

AND THEN WE GET A FUCKING INCREDIBLE VILLAIN SONG CALLED THE PITIFUL CHILDREN WHERE THE SQUIP IS LIKE “DUDE I’VE HELPED YOU SO MUCH BY SHOCKING YOU WHEN YOU SLOUCH OR DISOBEY ME, BUT IF YOU WANT TO ACHIEVE YOUR GOALS, WE NEED TO SYNC UP WITH THE ENTIRE SCHOOL. WE NEED TO HELP THEM ALL YOUR PEERS ARE JUST SO INCOMPLEEEETE YOU CAN’T SEE IT BUT THEY’RE ALL IN PAAAAIN THEIR OPERATING SYSTEM’S OBSOLEEEETE SO LET’S COMPLETE THE CHAINS AND GET INSIDE THOSE BRAINS LET’S SAVE THE PITIFUL CHILDREN WOOOOAAAHHH LET’S SAVE THE PITIFUL CHILDREN WOAAAAAHHHH LET’S TEACH THE PITIFUL CHILDREN WHO HAVEN’T A CLUE JUST WHAT TO DOOOOO HEELP THEM TO HEEEELP YOU” GOD WHY DO ALL THE SONGS IN THIS sHOW SLAP SO HARD AND THIS SONG HAS THE SQUIP MAKING ROBOT NOISES AND IT’S AMAZING

Anyway in this song Jenna gets squipped and we learn that she wants people to be as interested in her life as she is in theirs and no one is and that hurts god I feel you queen, also Rich somehow got enough Squips for the ENTIRE SCHOOL. SO YEAH. NOT HARD TO GUESS WHAT THE SQUIP WANTS. If everyone is squipped, they can all follow orders, Jeremy gets his dreams. It would be a good plan if it weren’t so fUCKEd UP AND EVIL

(so I should mention there’s been a subplot of a play)

We cut to Jeremy’s house and Jeremy has an argument with his dad, who is very understandably concerned about him. Jeremy’s acting VERY different, and it’s worrying him. Jeremy blows up at him for not acting like a dad since their mom left, just “waiting around for mom to get back.” Get therapy

Jeremy’s dad then proves himself to be very cool by realizing that him just wallowing in depression and not being an actual dad has been hurting his son, so he’s going to pull himself out of it, put on his fucking pants (don’t ask), and he’s gonna actually help his fucking son and this song is deadass called the Pants Song and it has no right to slap so hard

We cut to MIchael and he’s burning a bunch of mementos from his and Jeremy’s friendship, AND THEN JEREMY’S DAD SHOWS UP AND DEADASS ASKS MICHAEL “DO YOU LOVE HIM.” MICHAEL DOES NOT ANSWER, HE’S JUST LIKE “😳 what”. HE IS HAVING A REALIZATION. LESS THAN A MINUTE LATER IS THE LYRIC “BUT I’M NOT WHAT HE WANTS” “BUT YOU’RE JUST WHAT HE NEEDS” THIS ISN’T A FUCKING JOKE THIS HAPPENS

MICHAEL

Every day we stray further and further from Michael heterosexuality this is a good thing

Anyway Michael agrees that you know what? If he’s gonna try harder to be Jeremy’s friend (michael. michael.) then Jeremy’s dad has to try harder to be Jeremy’s dad and they both resolve to be better for Jeremy and it’s beautiful and amazing and I love it

Anyway the play subplot I’ve brushed over is happening and rapidly colliding with the main plot. So basically it’s Midsummer Night’s Dream with zombies and it’s amazing. Anyway Jeremy shows up and goes to Christine is like “Hey hey Christine, you know how you weren’t gonna date anyone because you needed to figure out who you were? And you know how you love play rehersal because you know what comes next and you know what to do? WELL, what if you knew who you were? What if it was like play rehersal all the time? All you need to do is take this thing from Japan and you’ll know who you are!”

In the bootleg I watched Christine KNEW what a Squip was because it hurt someone she cared about and I think that was an EXCELLENT choice and wasn’t in the og apparently and whoever added Christine knowing about the Squip was a genius but that’s irrelevant. The important thing is that she’s like “That sounds awful??? I wanna figure myself out without the help of some fuckin pill???” and there’s this FANTASTIC moment where Jeremy says the Squip will help Christine be better, and Christine asks “What’s wrong with me now?” IT’S GREAT I LOVE THIS SHOW

Anyway Christine exits, and Jeremy’s like “SHE’S RIGHT, I CAN’T DO THIS, WE NEED TO GET RID OF THE SQUIPS” but remember how Jenna was squpped? Yeah, Jeremy’s two braincells function for a minute and he’s like “WAIT A MINUTE. THE SQUIP SINGING ABOUT HOW WE’RE GONNA 'SAVE THE PITIFUL CHILDREN’ AND ‘GET INSIDE THOSE BRAINS’ AND HAVING A WHOLE SHOEBOX FULL OF SQUIPS. PROBABLY MEANT THE SQUIP IS GONNA GIVE THE WHOLE SCHOOL A SQUIP. WELL THAT AIN’T GOOD.”

Anyway the Squip’s gone full evil AI, we learn the drama teacher who has one of the best lines in the musical (”WE WILL NOW TAKE A FIVE MINUTE BREAK. SO THAT I CAN EAT A HOT POCKET.”) has been squipped, Jeremy’s like “ALCOHOL MESSED YOU UP I’LL GET DRUNK” and the Squip’s like “LMAO YOU CAN’T BE DRUNK FOREVER” then Jeremy remembers how desperate Rich was to find Mountain Dew Red and was like “WAIT WHAT IF THAT SQUIPS WHAT IF THAT TURNS OFF THE SQUIP” and the Squip is like “DUH??? WHY DO YOU THINK IT WAS DISCONTINUED??? AND THERE’S NO WAY YOU CAN GET IT BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE LIKE A FUCKIN TIME MACHINE” and Jeremy’s like “HA JOKES ON YOU MY BOYF RIEND IS NEURODIVERGENT AND LOVES COLLECTING 90S SOFT DRINKS <3” and then Squip’s like “HA TOO BAD YOU BROKE UP WITH YOUR BOYF RIEND” Squip homophobic everything’s going wrong the Squip’s voice is distorted Brooke and Chloe are both Squipped Jeremy tried calling Michael but is currently fighting for control of his body all hope is lost AND THEN IN THE NICK OF TIME

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA FUCK YOU SQUIP LOVE WINS THE BOYF IS HERE

SO MICHAEL HAS SHOWED UP TO SAVE HIS BOYF HE WAS IN THE AUDIENCE LIKE “WAIT A MINUTE THIS IS TOO DAMN GOOD FOR A SCHOOL PLAY THEY’VE ALL BEEN SQUIPPED HAVEN’T THEY” AND JEREMY WHO WAS SO FUCKING HAPPY TO SEE HIM ALREADY IS LIKE “YOU CAME TO SEE ME IN THE SCHOOL PLAY? 🥹” WHICH IS SO GAY THEY WERE IN LOVE AND YOU CAN’T TELL ME OTHERWISE AND MICHAEL’S LIKE “YEP AND I EVEN BROUGHT MOUNTAIN DEW RED”

So Michael’s like “AIGHT. I HAVE MOUNTAIN DEW RED. BUT I NEED AN APOLOGY FOR YOU KNOW, ABANDONING ME” and Jeremy’s like “MICHAEL I LOV EYOU BUT THE WORLD IS ABOUT TO END” and Michael’s like “JEREMY YOU FUCKING ABANDONED ME AND I HAD A PANIC ATTACK IN THE BATHROOM I KINDA NEED AN APOLOGY BECAUSE I’M FUCKING MAD???”

So Jeremy’s about to apologize but Squip homophobic and blocks Jeremy’s vocal chords so he can’t say it AND THEN MAKES HIM FIGHT MICHAEL AND MICHAEL REVEALS HE DOES CARE ABOUT POPULARITY HE JUST KNOWS IT WON’T HAPPEN SO HE JUST VIBES WHICH ME TOO KING I KNOW I HAVE NO CHANCE SO I AM JUST HERE TO HAVE A GOOD TIME WHICH I DON’T MOST OF THE TIME BUT TRUST ME WERE I NOT NERFED BY DEPRESSION I WOULD BE A GOD

So Jeremy fights the Squip for control like crazy, apologizes (HE SHOULD HAVE BROKEN DOWN RAMBLING ABOUT HOW MUCH HE’D FUCKED UP AND MICHAEL SHOULD HAVE CUT HIM OFF BY RUNNING AT HIM AND HUGGING HIM WE COULD’VE HAD IT ALL), Jake gets squipped and he’s like “LIVIN THE UPGRADE UPGRADE GOD I LOVE ME” which I feel that because occasionally I feel like I could kill god but none of that matters in my brain because Michael is holding Jeremy

Your honor they are in love

Anyway Chloe and Brooke show up, and Jeremy realizes that there’s a few drops of Mountain Dew Red left, and there’s a rEPRISE OF TWO PLAYER GAME AS THEY SNEAK ACROSS THE ROOM AND GET THE MDR THEY ARE IN LOVE

Jenna Rolan shows up (the script refers to her as the final boss which is just funny), Michael gets dragged away by the Squip zombies, Squip stops Jeremy from drinking the MDR, and then Christine shows up and AH FUCK SHE’S SQUIPPED AND IS IN LOVE WITH JEREMY NOW APPARENTLY

So upon seeing this, upon seeing that technically, he’s gotten what he originally wanted, Jeremy’s like “KNOW WHAT. FUCK IT.” and gives Christine the Mountain Dew Red, under the assumption that it’s gonna free her and her alone.

BOY IS HE WRONG! Christine takes the MDR and everyone starts screaming. Christine starts screaming, Jake starts screaming, Jenna starts screaming, Michael starts screaming but out of having no fucking clue what is going on, Jeremy starts screaming, there are a lot of J names in this show and I just noticed that, and somehwere Rich probably starts screaming as well. So anyway everyone who was Squipped passes out, and the Squip fuckimgn dies it’s great.

Anyway Jeremy wakes up in a hospital bed. Rich is in the same room, and describes losing the Squip as feeling like you “lost a piece of yourself.” Rich is thrilled that the Squip is gone. He then has an epiphany and realized he’s bisexual WOAH HE’S BISEXUAL I DIDN’T KNOW THAT

Anyway Michael shows up, Jeremy’s dad shows up, and there’s this song that means so much to me personally called “Voices In My Head” and it’s about how yeah you’ve all got voices in your head but you can’t listen to them you just gotta listen to yours, also Jeremy and Christine go out and I’m not mad about it because they’re honestly adorable fjdshfhds, there’s a hint the Squip is still in the back of Jeremy’s mind just with no control, and the musical ends

So yeah that’s the show, it’s so fucking fun, the writing isn’t great sometimes (the ending of the show is the weakest part), but I still like it a lot! The songs slap, the characters are great, I’ve had several mental breakdowns to Michael in The Bathroom because it’s a fantastic mental breakdown song highly recommend questioning everything about your friendships and self while it plays in the background as you sing along probably wrecking your throat slightly until you have every word memorized, and BMC is just fun as hell and has a lot of potential for angst fics. So yeah, go find bootlegs of it on YouTube, there’s also some bootlegs linked here and also this is just seratonin and makes my soul happy (don’t worry it’s completely sfw), here are two posts talking about the musical but shorter and more accurate, have fun, scroll through my BMC tag, please join the fandom I’m lonely

Uhhhh take my favorite BMC comic okay byee

Also Jeremy and Michael are in love

#asks #cassie rambles #be more chill #jeremy heere #michael mell #boyf riends #squip #cassie infodumps

[fairymascot]

what are your biggest problems with the eat bang kill tour series so far? art is fire tho for sure

HOO BOY where do i start

*it's criminally unfunny. this might seem minor compared to my other grievances with it, but it's a pretty huge flaw. hqtv is a show where i can pull up any episode, and i'll be laughing my ass off in no time. it's got some seriously masterful comedy, be it zingy one-liners or incredibly elaborate, surreal scenarios that get more and more beautifully ridiculous as they progress. tee franklin is incapable of reproducing either type of humor. i have not so much as cracked a grin once in four issues. it's a comedy series, people, hire someone with a sense of humor!

*the plot is string-thin and meaningless. they are on the run from gordo-- never mind that they could kill him in seconds if they wanted-- and every issue they end up someplace new, a random character makes a pointless cameo where they utter approximately three sentences and then disappear with no effect on the story. harlivy fight over something petty, make up and have sex, and then they move on to the next location where the exact same series of events occurs. there is no change or evolution over the course of the story, there are no twists and turns, you don't get to see new sides to the characters... it's all just repetitive and pointless.

*the characterization sucks ass. harley is careless and ditzy, retaining none of her emotional intelligence or the maturity she's gained over the course of two seasons. she never understands why ivy's upset and is completely helpless to deal with the difficulties in their relationship, despite canonically being a genius psychiatrist with a profound understanding of ivy's psyche.

ivy is the worst offender. she's characterized as angry, petty, toxic, and like she honestly can't stand to be in harley's company for more than five minutes at a time. i have no idea who tee franklin thinks she's writing, but it sure as hell isn't ivy. ivy in the show is endlessly patient with harley, she LOVES her and spending time with her, she is not at all annoyed by her mood swings and capriciousness because she understands that's part of the package. and when she's TRULY upset with harley, she doesn't lash out and belittle her-- the opposite, she bottles everything up. the way she's treating harley in this series is so far removed from canon, and 'she's upset because of the wedding' stopped being an acceptable excuse three issues ago.

*most of all, i really cannot forgive how she took Harlivy-- the BIGGEST lesbian couple in all of comics right now, a relationship that's globally adored by fans, and proceeded to shit all over it. the reason harlivy is so loved is because it's a narrative of two broken women who lift each other up. their relationship, while ofc not without its flaws, is about mutual love, support and healing. and franklin writes them as toxic and abusive with ivy constantly treating harley like garbage for no goddamn reason, and then turning around and lovebombing her so harley gets over it until the next time (which is typically five freakin' minutes later). it fucking sucks, it's not who they are, it's taking an iconic couple that fans have been waiting to see in an explicit romantic relationship for literal decades, and dedicating a whole miniseries to ruining that relationship. it's absolutely infuriating.

#askbox #text #eat bang kill tour #harlivy #dc comics #my rambles

[feathersketchcreations]

HOO boi remi. Why you nomming Blitz's hand? gib it back, ya kinky freak! lol. this took a lil bit longer then usual to make. so this drawing was actually done, because it's something that happened in an on going Story roleplay  my boyfriend and I have been doing since  I created my oc remi almost a month ago. In this scene, they were on their way to the wrath ring so Blitz could take her to learn horse back riding, cause yknow. horse obsession. and He was teasing her with her short height, and remi was like " don't test me, I may be short, but I wake up for it with how feisty I am"  or somethin. and he poked at her cheek while driving, teasing further. thats when she wrapped her tail around his wrist, and grabbed his hand, threatening to bite him, and he was like " don't you dare, or I'll put ya in your place!" and instead of biting, she then starts eating his finger,  nomming  hims hamnd. xD  with his response being something like the lil comic strip in the pic.i had a hard time with drawing the background as normally I dont DRAW cars for backgrounds, let alone the inside of a car. so I used a ref from the season 1 episode 8 sneek peak vivzie pop has up on her channel, to redraw the car from this view. Either way, I'm pretty proud. I love drawing out roleplay scenes and I thought it'd be SUPER cute for Remi. honestly If I had the money right now I'd commission someone for shipart but im broke af ;u;

Art (c) mine

 Remi (c) Mine

 Blitz/ Helluva boss (c)   Vivzie

#HOO boi remi. Why you nomming Blitz's hand? gib it back ya kinky freak! lol. this took a lil bit longer then usual to make. so this drawing #Helluva boss #helluva boss blitzo #helluvaboss #helluva boss imp #Helluva boss imp sona #Helluva boss impsona #Helluva boss demon #Helluva boss rp #Blitzo #blitzo x oc #Helluva boss art #Helluva boss fanart

[shannygoatgruff]

Only Fan(s) - A Thriller

Genre: Thriller

Pairing: Modern Ivar/OC

Warning: Language, sex, stalking, obsession, kidnapping, sexual assault

Rating: MA+18

Summary: Sometimes OnlyFans subscribers want a little more than internet pictures. Sometimes they want to be your ONLY fan…

Header by: @flowers-in-your-hayr

Thanks to @xbellaxcarolinax for being my beta.

Disclaimer: This story will deal with some topics that might be a little uncomfortable for some people. As always, I’ll try to tackle the hard stuff as tactfully as possible.

a/n: I know it’s been a minute. I’m always thinking about these stories because I want to finish them, just can’t seem to focus on writing at the moment.  Anyway, hope you enjoy.

Part iv - Date with Destiny

Finding Ivar Lothbrok should have been easy. Between the two of them, he was the stable one. He was the one with the iron-clad schedule that consisted of drinking, smoking, and partying. Torren’s schedule was a bit more... fluid. She tended to go wherever the wind, or whatever car she acquired, would take her. Naturally, Ivar had the occasional meet-and-greet, red carpet, and/or Comic-con engagement that he had to attend, still, he was pretty easy to keep tabs on. All one had to do was look at (stalk) his social media accounts, and his whereabouts were posted for everyone to see.

Knowing where he’d be and finding out where he lived were a different story. Torren had done her due diligence when it came to locating the town in which Little Kattegat was located. It only took about two days and a few Google image searches of the background of a few of the photos and she had it narrowed down to a general area in the Sierra Nevada Mountains.

From what she could tell, the closest town to where he lived was pretty small, and there were only a few large estates hidden in the woods. How hard could it be to find? She was willing to drive to every single house and knock on the door to find him if she had to. But it would just be easier if there was loud music and a bunch of cars in the driveway. That way she could tag along inside with the rest of the guests to get to her man. 

Her shirt landed in the pile of dirty clothes in the center of the bed, as she reached around to unhook her bra. “I really need to tell Baby Boo to stop putting all of his business out in these streets,” her brows furrowed as she shook her head, “What if some crazy, psycho bitch started stalking him, or some shit? Then I’d have to kill a bitch.” Torren’s head whipped around and she narrowed her eyes at his picture, still stuck on her wall, “Is that what you want? Huh? You want me to cut a bitch to prove to you how much I love you? I will, Bae! You know I would do anything for you. I’m your Ride or Die...” 

And being his Ride or Die meant that she needed to keep better tabs on him if she was going to protect him from someone crazier than her, God forbid.  She was only able to do so much on this prepaid phone, and going to the library to get online was becoming a pain in the ass. 

She’d considered stealing a laptop or iPad from the library but was still on the fence about the idea. Of course, the alternative meant going to stupid ass libraries and threatening little kids to get off the fucking computers, and that completely sucked ass. 

She always felt rushed when she logged onto her Bae’s Only Fans page from the public library. Without fail one of those little bastard kids would get the library Nazis to kick her off the computer, or bar her from the library altogether for watching porn. 

Ivar’s page wasn’t porn! It was art. It was sexy. It was love...his love for her. Stupid bitches. 

She had encountered far worse things than getting kicked out of the library, but some of these small towns usually only had one or two within their county limits. If she got banned, how was she supposed to check up on Ivar? In the time it took to log in until she got kicked out, she'd be lucky if she could check 2 of his accounts. What if he had some important information on another platform that she hadn’t checked yet? What was she supposed to do then?

Her relationship with Ivar was hanging in the balance, and she'd be damned if some snot-nosed kid or fucking uptight librarian would fuck that up. She needed a computer. But, on the flip side, when she finally got her man back, she wouldn't need one anymore. She could ask him directly what their plans were.

There was a lot to consider and that took time; time that she didn't have right now.

The thick layer of Nair shaving cream she had applied to her already hairless crotch, was just starting to tingle, signaling she had about 5 minutes left before the sweat-inducing, burning sensation would kick in alerting her to wash the cream off. Until then, she had time to consider an outfit for the night.

She knew Ivar well enough to know that he would want her to be sexy for him, but not so much to distract him from work. She could have gone for something slutty, like those skanky bitches he partied with. She could have gone for more demur, but then she would remind him too much of his bitch ex-wife and completely turn him off. The last thing she wanted on their first night back together was for him to be thinking about that bitch. She could have gone for a simple pair of jeans and a t-shirt, but Torren never did simple. 

No, Ivar would want her to be herself. That's what he loved about her. That's what attracted him to her in the first place. She would be sexy without being skanky; she would be demure without being a prude.

Fuck! It was already 7:33 p.m. How in the hell did she miss the beginning of his Live? Now she was running late.

She was supposed to be dressed and ready by the time his Live came on that way she could be out the door as soon as he finished. If she was going to make it to be on his Only Fans live stream tonight, she needed to get to his house before he got too distracted. Now, she’d have to watch his Live, while her cooch burst into flames before she had a chance to take a shower and finish picking out her outfit.

If there was one thing Torren was, it was punctual. It was bad enough that she was about 40 minutes outside of his town, but it could take her up to 2 or more hours to find his house. She only hoped that he didn’t plan on starting any real freaky shit on his Only Fans page until around midnight, cause it looked like she wouldn’t be getting there before then, anyway.  

With the smile still plastered on her face, Torren turned on the hot water for a shower, forgetting that the water didn’t get hot. She didn't mind, much, especially since the cold water gave her a break from the heat in her room. 

Phone in hand, she watched him, as she planted herself on the dirty bathtub floor, cross-legged, and started to get herself ready. Starting with her toes, she shaved each one, just below the knuckle, followed by her fingers, arms, pits, and each leg, from groin to ankle, three times. When the burning from her nether regions was so intense that she couldn’t tell her tears from the shower water dripping on her face, she quickly washed off the cream. 

All she could do was hope that she hadn’t broken the skin this time. The last time she had let that damn Nair stay on, just past burning, the skin broke and she bled. She was not having a bloody hoo-ha tonight. 

With that taken care of, she gently used the razor to remove any other pubes closer to the inside that needed to be removed. Then shaved her backside. When she had more time, she was going to get the internal hairs bleached, but she needed to find out what Ivar preferred. 

Shaving ate up so much of her time that she only had a few seconds to rub some body-wash that she had stolen from a drug store over her body and hoped it got rid of the smell of the summer heat. Her hair? Fuck it...she’d wash it another day, for now, this cold water would have to be enough. She’d spritz some perfume and hair spray in it and it would smell fine. 

Torren finished her shower, and walked out of the bathroom dripping wet, only using a towel to wrap around her hair. She was glad it was so hot in her room that her hair would air-dry quickly. She finger-combed her damp tresses to complete that ‘just got out of bed, but it's styled’ appearance. She knew how much he loved when her hair looked like that. It would remind him of freshly fucked hair. 

She spent extra time applying her makeup, even using an extra dark, thick application of eyeliner. She usually went for more subtle warm colors. They matched her tan skin tone better. But, tonight, she had bold, dark makeup, complete with varying shades of purple and blue eye shadows, and dark purple lipstick.

Torren was glad that she decided to match Ivar’s clothes this evening. The swim trunks and smoking jacket he wore would compliment her beautifully. She wanted everyone to know that they dressed alike, the way real couples do. If he was going for less is more, so would she.

She settled on black leather chaps that tied up on the sides, and tight blue boy shorts that left the bottom half of her ass cheeks exposed. The blue shorts brought out the blue swirls in his trunks; she knew he'd appreciate that touch. Her top was a blue bandanna that she wore as a halter with a short black leather jacket with tassels on the sleeves. 

They screamed “couple” in her eyes.

Completely satisfied with how she looked, Torren locked the door to her motel room and started down the hall. She deliberately stopped by the window and peered through the partially opened blinds of the people staying next door to her. She knocked on the window to get the attention of the young couple inside. Judging from their appearance, they were too strung out to know who she was, or that it was her music that they constantly banged on the wall about. She didn’t care. She still flipped them off before making her way to the stairs. 

Reaching her hand through the busted window of the blue Ford Taurus to unlock the door from the inside. Torren slid into the driver's seat and leaned over to find the two cords that she had pulled out from under the steering column when she stole the car. Flicking the cords together, she listened as the engine reluctantly turned over.

She put the car in reverse, looked in the rear-view mirror at her makeup, then pulled out of the spot. As she turned onto the road leading to the highway, she listened to the knocks, bumps, and hisses that her car made. There wasn't time to do much about it now; not when she was on her way to get her man. But, she made a mental note to do something about it later in the week. The only thing she could do was turn the music up louder to drown out the car noise.

Truthfully, she should have stolen a better car than the piece of shit Taurus that she found in the parking lot of the Quickie Mart while driving through Tulsa, Oklahoma. There were plenty of better cars there to choose from but no one would have wanted to take this one. It was so sad looking that she took pity on it. She had been doing the owner of this crap car a favor, by taking it off of their hands. 

The car was truly fucked. The oil light stayed on, and it drank gas like her mother drank liquor. The car had protested every inch of the ride across the three states that she traveled through in one day. She knew that it would only be a matter of time before that piece of shit breathed its last breath.

She needed to get gas again, but fuck that car. She had already refueled four times since she stole it. Gas wasn't cheap and she wasn't putting another dime in that gas guzzler. Speaking of money, she made a mental note to steal another credit card. It would only be a matter of time before the owner of the one that was tucked snugly between her left breast and strapless bra, would eventually realize that it had been lifted from the table in the diner, and canceled.

Laptop, butt bleaching, car, credit card, and more eyeliner from Walgreen's…her To-Do list was growing. She really needed to take some time off and take care of the necessities. Not tonight, though. She had other things to do. She couldn't do anything else, right now, but get to her man. Besides, once Lothbrok was by her side, he would help her remember all the things she needed to do.

As she came off of the highway exit smoke started billowing out from the engine. It backed up through the exhaust system, and came through the vents, inside the cabin. It was ironic – the air-conditioning vents in the car didn't work, but they seemed to work well enough to clog the inside of the car up with thick white smoke. She drove a few more miles before the smoke was so thick that she could no longer see. As she pulled the car over to the graveled shoulder of the road, the car knocked and shook, before it finally cut off.

Just her fucking luck.

She reached under the dash to flick the cords against each other again, trying to force the ignition to catch again, but it wouldn't. The engine had nothing left to give her. "Fuck Murphy and fuck his fucking law," she said calmly as she pulled the hood release.

She opened the car door, taking care to place both black, platform boots on the ground before lifting her backside from the seat. Placing her sunglasses on her eyes, she walked with one foot in front of the other to the front of the Taurus and placed her hand on the hood. It was hot, but not so hot that she couldn't feel under the front of the lever.

As she lifted the heavy metal hood and placed the rod in the slot to hold it in place, Torren let the smoke from the engine engulf her. It was quite a head rush breathing in the thick engine smoke through her nose, and exhaling it from her mouth. She patiently waited for the smoke to thin out before she bent, at the waist, over the engine. She didn't know what she was looking for, but she knew that someone would see her looking over the engine and stop to help her.

Now, if only someone would actually come down this dark stretch of road, she could be back on her way to Ivar.

It didn't take long before a pair of headlights rounded the bend of the road, just off to her right. Shifting her weight from one foot to the other, she accentuated the leather, chaps against her hips, and lifted her ass higher in the air, to catch the driver's attention. She couldn't help but smirk when she heard the tires of a large vehicle turn onto the graveled pavement in front of where she broke down. She didn't turn to face the car or the driver. She didn't care who they were or what they looked like. She had an appointment to keep and this pit stop was fucking up her timetable.

"You need some help?" A deep voice asked as its owner approached her.

Torren took a moment to peer around the hood, noticing that there were no other cars around. "Broke down," she answered, continuing to bear her weight from one hip to the other. She placed her hands on the metal frame of the car, arched her back, and looked at the man over her shoulder. "You know something about cars?"

"Yeah," he replied, moving around to her side, looking at her, and not the smoky engine.

She gave him half a smile, as she noticed him notice her. "You a mechanic or something?" She asked standing up. She rubbed her hands together to remove some of the visible engine soot while considering the guy in front of her. He was about 6 feet tall with a moderate build. He was dressed in blue jeans, a black t-shirt, and Timberland boots. He didn't look like he was more than 25 years old. Judging from the way he was looking at her and from the ring on his left hand, he wasn't too worried about her car, or his wife, for that matter.

"Nah, not a mechanic, but I work on my own car... in my spare time." He smiled when she did. She was gorgeous, in that slutty kind of way. She wouldn't be dressed like that and leaning over the hood of a car if she wasn't looking to have some fun. "Lemme take a look at it."

Did he work on his car? Hopefully, that meant that his ran better than hers did.

Torren moved over to the side and let him take the position under the hood. "I'll be right back," he explained before walking over to the bed of his F150.

Grabbing a flashlight from the trunk, he took a second to admire the view of her, from behind. If he could get her car moving again, she would hopefully follow him to this cheap motel he knew that was just up the highway.

He leaned in close, taking a whiff of her hair, "You overheated…want to check the coolant level."

She had heard him say something else but she had stopped listening; she was too busy watching the street. "You want me to try to start it?" she asked, removing her sunglasses before making her way to the driver's door. She wasn't sure if he answered or not. She had no intention of driving the Taurus again, even if he could get it started. She just needed to get something out of the car.

She slid into the seat and reached down on the floor. She found the hard metal object on the floor of the passenger's side and gripped it tightly. As she walked back around to the front of the car, she heard him talking, presumably about the car, or maybe he was asking her out. Who the fuck knows? She was on a tight schedule and all of his chatting was holding her up. She stood by the side of the hood, looking at the angle he was leaning over the hood. Quickly, she lifted her arm, and with one powerful blow, she struck him in the head with the crowbar that she used to procure her now-defunct car.

Torren stood over his body, looking at him intensely. God, it felt good. The rush of knowing that one minute this dude was towering over her, and the next he was on the ground. She had dropped his ass. She was the one with the power.

 "Thanks," she said, digging her hand in his pocket to retrieve his cash, credit card, and the keys to his truck. She wiped the blood on the crowbar on his shirt before walking to her new mode of transportation.

Torren sat in the truck's driver's seat and turned on the engine. She had managed to cross two things off of her To-Do list without even planning to.

Thank God the truck had air conditioning. All this heat and humidity was bound to make her hair frizzy. She cranked the AC up as high as it would go and sat still for a moment enjoying the cool air. After a minute, she adjusted the seat and tilted the rearview mirror to look at herself. She was starting to sweat and her eyeliner was starting to run just a bit at the corners of her eyes. She dabbed at the black liner to even out the lines, and then pushed the mirror back to where she could see. Giving the area another once-over, she made sure that no one else had seen her interaction with that guy on the ground, before pulling out from the gravel and onto the paved street.

"Ugh!" Torren yelled. Chester Bradley, the printed name on the credit card, had shitty taste in music. She pushed the stereo button on the steering wheel to do a scan of the radio. Anything was better than country music. Once she found some trap music on the XM radio, she turned up the volume and pulled back onto the highway.

Part iii/

Tags: @ideagarden-blog1  @youbloodymadgenius @xbellaxcarolinax @a-mess-of-fandoms @didiintheblog @conaionaru @peachyboneless @flowers-in-your-hayr @heavenly1927 @zuxiezendler @waiting4inspiration @saldelys @revolution-starter​

#OnlyFan(s) #modern ivar #shannygoat #shannyland #Date with Destiny

[dukethomas]

🔥 + duke thomas :+D

dee my bestie ty for asking me abt duke!! <333333 now i'm not sure if these are necessarily UNPOPULAR opinions but my god duke is the first char i've read all the way through for so i am having some opinions

okay uhhh first: fanon duke is racist, full-stop, and that's when fanon stans bother to include him at all. he debuted several years ago!! he started being a core part of the batfam specifically in rebirth, five years ago!! he's part of the family, jfc, and no he's not the normie sane one, and no not knowing how to write/draw duke is not an excuse for his exclusion. the dc wiki exists. reading recs exist! duke's first solo, batman and the signal, is literally only 3 issues long! pirating comics is easy as fuck!

next: he was a robin!! we are robin was not made of conventional, batman-sanctioned robins. that's the point. those kids made robin their own, and even if they moved on (hoo boy i've also got thoughts abt we are robin in rebirth and onwards despite their minimal appearances) they were robin. they chose to be there for their city, they chose to stand up and fight, and imo if you consider the kids from the we are robin movement not really robins you're missing the whole damn point

also, i think duke should have had a much bigger role in the batfam in rebirth, like i know rebirth was going back to the roots, but also. i feel like he's kind of thematically set up as being part of the next generation of heroes, he's the future of the batfam, and i absolutely fucking adore that angle for him. literally it's so perfect??? he's "something new" but still rooted in the very same determination to fight and hope for a better future that bruce was (and still should be) motivated by from the very beginning. if rebirth was supposed to make it easier for new readers while still being recognizable for old fans? come on. it would have been so interesting to explore in a lot more depth how duke interacts w the batfam and gotham and what that means for their future (which isn't to say i don't like the appearances duke has in rebirth onwards. i do) (and also. bruce consistently treats duke well as compared to literally anyone else lmao and i do enjoy that dynamic and i would like to have seen more of bruce training and mentoring duke to be the future of the batfam)

that in mind, duke is not a good fit for the outsiders. i love his dynamics with cass, jeff, and tatsu, his appearance in future state outsiders was SO fun and so fitting i could cry, and i am hyped for what brandon thomas is going to do with duke in the upcoming outsiders series(?) because he is a FANTASTIC writer for duke who really lets him shine and clearly respects him and loves him, but. duke's whole thing is literally being a new hero in the day, someone visible in the light, and the outsiders are supposed to be on the fringe, literally outsiders, and a team not rlly meant to be in the public eye (from what i understand) so with the direction duke took in batman and the signal that is the opposite of what duke is meant to be. i def enjoy him on teams, but this ain't it. that said i do like that duke being on the outsiders means connections to the wider non-gotham dc universe and also consistent duke appearances is something i will always appreciate

last opinion bc this is getting long—i've got many thoughts on batman secret files the signal, one of them is that i think having a cure for joker toxin being right there is too cheap. like sure you can play the cat and mouse game with it but after a while? that'll get repetitive and boring. a few more options. duke gets his hands on the cure, but there's a catch. or duke never gets his hands on the cure, it disappears forever. or duke does get his hands on the cure, and it works. i think the first and last options would be the most interesting to explore going forward, but i'm also just. attached to the tragedy of his story, knowing his parents are alive but they may never get better but also hoping they will. and with how little that's been explored (not mentioned or referenced or seen, explored. which hasn't been done since all-star batman i think) and also with comics being an ongoing medium i do think bringing in the cure this early is a little cheap and also too soon too fast

actual last opinion duke is the best i love him so bad i will not be taking criticism <3

#ask #dee tag #this is actually not everything i have to talk abt but i am trying to keep it short. and i am failing #crys writes meta #<- adding this on bc i'm making this a tag now. and what is a long post of rambling if not meta

[violett-writes]

Love Languages and Achievements

Everyone knew Karl's love language was touch. It was very obvious to even the most dense of fans. From kissing his friend's cheek to slamming into others with a powerful hug, the man always showed his affection through touch.

The Dream SMP friend group thought that he was the very definition of touch love language. No one in their eyes could ever top Karl.

Until they met you. Hoo boy did you top Karl and his touching.

When you and the boys, Nick, Clay, and George met up, you always had a hand on one of them. At the airport you slammed into Nick with a hug, nearly taking him off his feet before he caught you and gave you an equally tight hug. When you met George for the first time, you grabbed his hands and squeezed so hard he thought his fingers broke. When you met Clay, you gave him a good ol' british kiss, smacking your lips comically loud as you did.

So, the boys started brainstorming. From your hilariously loud laugh to your squeaks when you get too excited, they knew you would be a perfect match for their soft friend.

They contacted the one person they knew would be able to make this a reality.

green block man, the queen, cowboy, and jimster

"Operation Matchmaker" group chat

green block man

Jimmy. We need a favor.

jimster

ummm what's up?

the queen

You know (Y/N)?

jimster

sorta?

cowboy

this is operation matchmaking

green block man

we did not agree on that name...

the queen

YES WE LITERALLY DID

cowboy

guys stfu focus

jimster

what is going on

green block man

(y/n) and karl

jimster

i think im following

the queen

can you do some video to get them together????

And so the plan was set into motion. Jimmy was going to craft the perfect challenge video with the members of the Dream SMP that could make it and of course, the main characters, you and Karl.

Jimmy recruited as many people as he could, posing it as a Dream SMP meet up. You, Quackity, Badboyhalo, Sapnap, Dream, George, Tommy, Wilbur, Tubbo, Jimmy, and of course, Karl, were all going to meet up at one of his filming studios. It was going to be a real life minecraft video, where you all had to complete various minecraft achievements. The one with the most achievements at the end wins $1,000.00.

The day of the video, you picked out a creeper costume while on facetime with Nick.

"Nick," You whine, pulling up your thigh high fishnet stockings. You giggle at yourself in the mirror, your green dress just barely grazing the top of your stockings, the painted on pixels making you just pass for an attempted creeper. Key word, attempted.

You grab your phone and turn it around showing off your ridiculous costume. "I don't think this is appropriate. Is anyone else going to be dressing up??" You ask him as he bursts out laughing at your getup.

"I'm going to be an oak log and Wilbur is going to be an enderman, but those are the only two confirmations I got." Nick choked out, tears filling his eyes as he continues to laugh.

"And why do I have to be the only one dressing up as an e-whore?!" You break down, laughing at yourself as you add green blush and winged eyeliner.

You roll your eyes at Nick and hang up the phone as you get into your car to drive to the address Jimmy texted you a few weeks ago.

When you finally arrived, Nick was sitting in his car as you pull up next to him. He got out and you were finally able to see his costume. A brown striped hoodie with equally hideous brown pants topped off with a light brown beanie.

You immediately start to giggle, covering your stomach as you bend over, trying to suppress your loud snorts. "That.... that is the worst costume I have ever seen!" You continue to laugh as you grab onto Nick's shoulder. Once the two of you got all your giggles out, you walked hand in hand into the studio.

You were met with Wilbur, dressed as an enderman, Clay, dressed up as a lava block, and Tommy dressed as a pig. You and Nick spent far too long laughing at Tommy's outfit, much his chagrin.

After Tommy was finally finished shouting at you and Nick for laughing at his costume, you finally went into the main filming room, riding in on Wilbur's back. The meet up was already in full swing. Bad and George were chatting in a corner, glasses of punch in hand. Quackity and Tubbo were laughing at the snack table. Jimmy and Karl were whispering together by the cameras.

"(Y/N)!" George yelled, enthusiastically waving at you. You giggle and wave at him, getting off of Wilbur's back to bounce over to him. You wrap him into a tight hug.

"I'm so glad to see you again!" You whisper into his chest.

Jimmy claps, gaining the attention of everyone in the room. "Alright folks, as most of you know, we're going to be doing a minecraft achievements challenge. You have to try and gain the most challenges in minecraft. But, what you don't know, is this is going to be a partner challenge!"

You gasp, biting your lip as you excitedly grin at the faces around you. Most of them you know well, aside from Jimmy and Karl whom you've only spoken to once or twice.

"Here's the partner list," Jimmy takes a deep breath for suspense. "Dream and George!" The two boys go to each other's side, high fiving each other.

"You fools are going down!" Clay snears as George points two fingers at all of you.

"Quackity and Badboyhalo!" The two step to the otherside of Clay and George, grinning at each other.

"You muffin heads are screwed!" Bad giggles, trying to act tough as Quackity nods excitedly.

"Sapnap and Wilbur!"

Sapnap and Wilbur join each others side, lining up with the rest of the teams as they nod in silence glaring at the groups.

"Tubbo and Tommy!"

"Obviously." Clay groans, rolling his eyes as the younger pair bump chests, making obnoxious grunts that you can only described as frat boy hype noises.

"and (Y/N) and Karl." Jimmy announces the last time and you smile, skipping over to Karl.

You offer him your hand, "Nice you meet you, Karl. We're going to kick some serious ass."

Karl nods, shaking your hand as you two line up with the other teams. "100% win streak, baby!"

You giggle as Karl wraps his arm around your shoulders, pulling you tight to him. You wrap your arm around his middle, leaning your head onto his shoulder.

"As you can see, we have various items around the studio." Jimmy goes on to explain the rules of the game as you glance around the room.

Off in the left side of the corner, there was a makeshift oak forest. On the right side there was a stone wall. In the middle there was a table headed by Chandler, labeled as CRAFTING TABLE. He had boxes filled with various craftable items behind him. In the middle of the room there was a kiddy pool, something in the bottom that you can't quite see. Nearby the crafting table there was a table with chests, labeled as INVENTORY.

"Get as many achievements as you can. I'll be watching to see which ones you gain. Only one team can make one achievement. I'll be keeping score and crossing off the ones already achieved. Let the games begin!" Jimmy yells, winking at the camera off to the side as the teams start running to different corners of the room.

You gasp, grabbing Karl's hand and dragging him to the table with the inventory chests on it.

You open the box as Karl realizes what you're doing. He quickly looks over to Jimmy. "We opened our inventory!"

Jimmy nods, putting a point onto the score board and crossing out Taking Inventory on the Achievement List.

"And (Y/N) and Karl just got their first achievement." His words were met with loud groans.

"How could we have forgotten that one?!" George asks, slapping his forehead as him and Clay break apart the constructed oak tree.

You look over at Karl with parted lips and giggle. This is the first time you ever really looked at Karl. Of course you've watched his streams, but a web camera can only do someone so much justice. His tousled brown hair laid on his forehead, almost in front of his eyes. It makes you pause for a second, butterflies forming in your stomach.

Karl smiles, his eyes creasing as he stares back at you, your fingers still laced together. "I like your costume, by the way." He laughs, looking down at your outfit.

You smile appreciatively, "I like yours... mooshroom cow?" You glance down at his red paints and painted shirt, crude mushrooms painted on. He nods and you giggle, smiling brightly at him. The outfit makes him look so adorable.

"George and Clay have gotten their first achievement." Jimmy announces, as he crosses off Getting Wood off the achievement list.

It startles you out of your thoughts and the two of you get your heads back into the game.

Karl drags you over to the forest. The two of you work together to take down your tree, opening the boxes made to look like oak blocks to find oak planks.

With the oak planks in hand, you two went over to the crafting bench near the inventory table. Chandler winked at Karl as he handed him sticks in return for two oak planks. The two of you then handed him three oak planks and two sticks for a wooden pickaxe.

"(Y/N) and Karl got their second achievement!" Jimmy announces as he crosses off Time to Mine! off the list.

You two high five, laughing loudly as Karl grips your shoulder, doubling over as he giggles at the ridiculousness of this game. Finally, Karl gestures to his back and you hop on, his arms wrap around your thighs as the two of you running over to the wall of stone.

With the pickaxe, the two of you were able to get two pieces of stone. You run back over to the trees to get more wood as Karl goes over to the crafting bench. Once you return, you trade the wood blocks for sticks.

"Tubbo and Tommy got their first achievement!" Jimmy announces, crossing off The Lie off the list. Of course the boys would first make a cake.

You and Karl trade the stone and the sticks for a hoe.

"(Y/N) and Karl got their third achievement!" Jimmy states, crossing off Time to Farm! off the list.

And so the game went off. Getting an Update crossed off by Sapnap and Wilbur, Acquire Hardware gotten by George and Dream, Hot Topic achieved by Bad and Alex, Time to Strike! done by Tommy and Tubbo, and Delicious Fish gained by you and Karl. By the end of it, you were slightly damp and panting, of course the fish were at the bottom of a kiddy pool which Karl decided to jump into.

At the end of the day, George and Clay won. The were showered in money from the money gun as the rest of the teams had to chant their names.

You and Karl had become awfully close after the four hour long challenge. The whole time you had a hand on each other, from giving each other piggyback rides (though you had failed miserably when you tried to carry him), to always having one hand laced together, to hugging tightly at every achievement gained.

Needless to say, you had gained one achievement you never thought you would... gaining a crush.

Jimmy finished off the video with George and Clay on his side going through his signing off spiel.

"That was so fun!" Bad said, clapping when the cameras stopped rolling. The studio was a mess of open boxes laying everywhere, haphazardly thrown by the teams and water gleamed on the floor around the kiddy pool, courtesy of yours truly.

You nodded, glancing over at Karl with a bright smile. "That was really fun!" You wrapped your arms around him in a side hug and he gladly returned the gesture. You couldn't help but giggle, burying your head into his chest.

"I'm starving!" Tubbo complained loudly, rubbing his stomach.

Tommy nodded, "Yes, the big man needs big nourishment!"

You giggled at him, Karl's chest rumbling as he laughed along with you. Jimmy smiled, "You're in luck, big man, the pizza just arrived."

You all cheered and walked into the small room designated for eating. One large table sat in the middle, 8 chairs lined up around it. There weren't enough chairs for all of you unfortunately. Clay and Nick choosing to sit on the floor near the chair George claimed. However, rather than let you sit on the floor to eat, Karl patted his lap. You graciously sat on his lap, munching on your slice of cheese pizza.

Nick and Clay whispered to each other as George conspicuously snapped pictures of the two of you. Karl's arms wrapped around your middle, using your lap as a table for his plate. You two were engaged in a whispered conversation, loud laughs coming from each of you every so often.

By the end of the night, you were exhausted and full. The british gang went back to their airbnb. As you, Clay, Nick, Bad, Quackity, and Jimmy lazily walked back to your cars, yawns coming from you every so often.

Karl and you walked to your car, his arm wrapped around your middle as you leaned your head on his shoulder, tired beyond your mind. Nick and Clay walked on your right side, talking about the day's challenge.

"So, uh, your love language is touch, right (Y/N)?" Nick asked you, not so subtly. Blush flares onto your cheeks and you laugh, shrugging slightly as you pick your head up to glance over at him.

"I would say so. I just appreciate it. Ya know?" You hum, putting your head back down onto Karl's shoulder.

Clay checks Nick's shoulder, winking at him.

"You know what sounds so fun right now, Nick?" Clay asks, mischief in his voice.

"I don't know, what sounds so fun right now, Clay?" Nick asks, giggling slightly.

"A sleepover!" He announces, pumping his fist in the air.

You gasp, nodding excitedly, suddenly not tired at all. "A sleepover sounds so fun! Right Karl?!" You look over at the brown eyed boy who seems as equally as excited as you.

"We could have a sleepover at my apartment!" You say, nodding at the three boys. "I have snacks and we could watch movies!"

Nick and Clay laugh, nodding.

"Wait, Jimmy drove me here." Karl says, looking over at Jimmy whose waiting by his car, scrolling through his phone bored.

"I'm sure (Y/N) can drive you!" Clay offers and you nod quickly.

Karl quickly agrees and lets Jimmy know the plan. The four of you were off on another adventure, Clay and Nick following you in their cars to your apartment which wasn't too far away.

The whole car ride there, you and Karl sang along to all the oldies, screaming like the crackheads you were. Your hand was always in his, only leaving it momentarily when you had to turn. The half an hour drive seemed like hours as you two cracked jokes and got to know each other.

The sleepover was spent in your living room, the four of you watching Disney movie after Disney movie and throwing popcorn at each other. You and Karl spent the the night wrapped up in each other's arms, cuddling under the shared blanket. Your butterflies only got stronger.

The next morning, Clay and Nick got plenty of shots of the two of you sleeping, cuddled up in each other's arms.

And suddenly you were added to a group chat named Operation Matchmaker with a whole album of pictures of the two of you from the challenge and the sleepover. Only then did you notice how Karl looked at you, a twinkle in his eyes as you looked at him in equal adoration. Pictures of you on his back, your head thrown back with your mouth open, laughing. You and Karl in the kidding pool, splashing water on each other. Finally, you and Karl asleep, wrapping up in each other's embrace, even your legs tangled together.

Who would've thought you would have gained the achievement being liked back.

#karl jacobs #minecraft yt #dream team #dream team appreciation #sapnap #nick #george #georgenotfound #dream #dreamwastaken #karl #jacobs #karl jacobs x reader #karl jacobs fanfiction

[lightstar789]

My Final Thoughts on My Deepest Secret

SPOILER WARNING FOR SEASON 3!

Well folks. We did it, we've reached the end, and I couldn't be anymore sadder.

I first discovered MDS when the season 2 finale banner went up. I clicked on it, expecting a melodramatic love triangle. However, when I clicked on episode 69 (bad move, I know now) I was shocked to see the black-haired boy, whom I thought was the second-lead, on the ground with a bloody arm, calling out Emma for committing a series of gruesome events. Emma, the innocent-looking protagonist suddenly threatening him with a knife? I couldn't believe it. And so I started reading.

Fast-forward nearly a year later, and it's time to bid farewell to this magnificent WEBTOON. So, I wanted to write my final thoughts on each of the characters, and the plot itself. Obvious spoilers ahead, so let's jump right into it!

THE PLOT:

My Deepest Secret drowns in twists, each one making the story more convoluted as I continued reading. Emma going from bubbly, with a mysterious past, to a broken young woman who just wants those around her to stop worrying about her and be happy. Elios going from charming, to a yandere, to not even being real in the first place, to being killed by Emma, to having him miraculously survive, to be the son of Mr. Oscar. Sophie turning into a backstabbing betrayer, to Yohan abandoning his morals in the pursuit of love, and Hana being a decent person underneath it all.

While some were good, some of these twists weren't executed well, and were inherently problematic from the presentation (looking at you, DID fakeout and Yohan throwing his morals away for Emma twists). I still held out to the end to see a resolution and hoped that the DID storyline was a hoax. Luckily, Emma clarified what she really suffered from, that being hallucinations and hearing voices, and I blew a sigh of relief.

THE CHARACTERS:

Emma Brenton: Let's start with our main protagonist with a mysterious past. Sweet, empathetic, and courageous, she was loveable in every single way. Though she was witless to "Elios'" doings, she still made a wonderful protagonist. However, things take a turn by the third season. After regaining her memories, she becomes heavy with guilt, and her personality becomes a lot more mature, still wanting to do what was right in the end and turning herself into the police, after it was revealed that she was behind most of the series' main conflicts. At the end of the day, I still love Emma, and I hope she's doing better in rehab.

Yohan Lee: One of my favorite fictional detectives ever! Charismatic, funny, but also incredibly sharp and intelligent, he instantly became my favorite character. I was literally rooting for him along with others for him to end up with Emma at the end. At least, until the third season. Hoo boy. He goes from being law-abiding and kind to becoming a rebel to the system, choosing to protect Emma from the law, against his own original morals. The twist came out of left field, and after finding out how he used Sophie as bait, it really left a sour taste in my mouth. I know one of the main themes of this webcomic is that 'not everyone's as they seem,' but the justice-seeking kid turning morally gray isn't something I was a fan of. Regardless, he's still an amazing and funny character, and he's still one of my favorites.

Elios Dunsworth: Where do I even begin? I went from hating him, absolutely detesting him, mind-boggled by how kind he actually is, and felt empathy towards him. Yandere!Elios was manipulative, mean, and a full on sociopath. This belief carried on for so long before it was revealed in episode 69 that Emma stabbed him a year ago, and has been hallucinating him out of guilt ever since, prompting her to 'become' Elios to subside those feelings. I immediately loved the real Elios, which we got to see during flashbacks to Emma's past, and the three-part "Elios" arc. He was putting on this perfect mask so as to not disappoint others around him, and seeing Farah gradually help him take it off was one of the sweetest things to ever happen in this comic. Elios becoming my favorite character by the end of the series is a sentence I would've never seen myself saying a year ago, but it's true!

Hanamika: I was hoping that Hana wasn't really romantically involved with the professor and didn't frame the trio for cheating, and boy was I relieved. Authors. This is how to write a best friend character. She's blunt, yet incredibly compassionate towards her friends. I smiled when she talked Yohan out of committing suicide, knowing full well it would've worked, because it was her. She's the no-nonsense, loyal, and caring BFF that Yohan definitely needed, and I think they make a fine pair (platonically)!

Sophie McCarthy: As soon as she appeared, I knew she was going to do something bad. And I was right. She put herself down an unhealthy amount, to the point that I started to cast suspicions on her. Enter season 2, where she accidentally pushes Emma into a river, and doesn't think of telling anyone else. I pity her, because she got the short end of the stick, having been bullied, used as bait by Yohan, stabbed, knocked unconscious and entering a coma, but she still did those things to Emma and never apologized. I don't exactly hate her, but don't like her at the same time.

Farah: Literally the sweetest girlfriend anyone could ask for. No wonder Emma was jealous. She helped Elios take of his mask and remained patient for him, even though she knew it'd take a long time. She's so sweet that she still managed to feel pity for Emma when she was holding her at knifepoint. Thank god she wasn't run over by that car and was able to get help for Elios.

Nura Kim: A complete foil to Hana, Nura is the stereotypical sassy best friend trope that I have come to hate, but with a twist. She's actually concerned for Emma's well-being, convincing her to report her sexual assault case to the police, and is insanely protective of the main trio. She's extremely violent, and has literally chased and beat up Yohan once he was accused of calling Emma fat (he didn't). She also has threatened to kill the professor who assaulted Emma. While I was sure that at one point, she'd actually commit a crime, luckily, she didn't. I was pretty surprised she got engaged to Jamie of all people though, but they have an interesting dynamic. Never change Nura, never change.

Overall, that's all I have to say about the WEBTOON. Full of engaging and funny characters, yet with a morbid plot, My Deepest Secret does a good job with balancing the dark with the light. I'm sad to see this one come to an end, and I hope that Hanza Art will create many more in the future. I wish them the best of luck in the future, and hope that people remember this comic for many years to come. Goodbye, My Deepest Secret, and thank you.

#my deepest secret webtoon #my deepest secret