#i spoke to my mother on the phone this morning & i almost burst into tears

[felizusnavidad]

you'd think it's finally getting better, i found a job i don't hate yet, i have my amazing friends, i live in my favourite city in the world, & yet... i feel like something's missing.

#the last time i felt happy was when i was at home actually #i spoke to my mother on the phone this morning & i almost burst into tears #i also miss my sister & i know she feels the same #she's thinking about coming back to poland which is insane to me #but i totally get it #like i never thought i could even think about coming back home but here we are #i don't think i'll ever find my happiness here or maybe i just don't belong anywhere #idk #sorry for this negative energy i just felt like oversharing #i may delete this later #but sincerely can you hear me?*

[erwinsvow]

𝐝𝐚𝐦𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.

summary: uncle eren comes to visit.

warnings: step-cest, jealousy, manipulation, hints of verbal/emotional abuse + touch of dubcon to con, reader feels guilty, grinding/dry-humping, overstimulation, orgasm denial, unprotected sex

author's note: part two of sole salvation. i really hope everyone enjoys this! the warnings are just to be on the safe side as i do not want to accidentally trigger anyone, please feel free to message me if you want to ask about something before reading.

tagging @sangwoos-mom & @divine-delight :)

If Zeke didn’t want my interest to get piqued, Eren thinks to himself as he watches you stroll away, off to get him to a fresh cup of lemonade, he should have kept his mouth shut.

When his brother had mentioned his new fiancee had a daughter, Eren had supposed it would be some spoiled, bratty kid. After all, he had met your mother once before, and he didn’t think that kind of a woman could raise someone even remotely well-behaved.

So given that, he was more than pleasantly surprised the first time he met you. It was all a shock, from the almost angelic way you float down the stairs to greet him, your soft skin and sweet smile, to the genuine look in your eyes when you tell him that you’re glad to finally meet him.

He still doesn’t know what Zeke did to deserve you in his life, the taste in his mouth a touch too bitter when he watches the way you look at his brother, even when your mom is in the same room. It’s dreamy, as though there’s no better way to spend your time and nothing better to think about than your step-father.

It’s a little unfair, Eren thinks, that Zeke has a sweet, doting little thing head over heels for him. It’s a little unfair that Zeke waited so long to invite him over, to introduce him to you. Maybe it was brotherly instinct, maybe he knew that once Eren met you, he wouldn’t be able to think about anything else, just like it had been for Zeke.

Regardless of what it was, Eren knew one thing for certain. Sibling should always share.

It finally takes an unbearable conversation on the phone with your mother for an excuse, an opportunity to arise. The lie is taking hold in his head and spilling out of his mouth before he can even control it—“Yeah, the pipes burst and it’s just a mess, I called Zeke but his phone’s off- no, really? Just for the weekend, I promise- thank you, I’ll be over soon.”

His bag is packed and cock is twitching at the idea of getting you alone in that house, maybe when Zeke’s locked away in his office and your mother’s out shopping. It’s going to be a hot week, with almost intolerable heat, and he’s positive it’ll have you in revealing clothes (no doubt ones that his brother bought for you) and teensy swimsuits when you go for an afternoon swim.

That’s what he’s thinking of—the image of you soaked to the bone, wet hair and the thin, dripping material of your suit sticking to your skin—when he pulls into your driveway later that day.

It’s almost easy enough to miss the slight wobble in your steps, the way your clothes are just a little too wrinkled for someone that’s been sitting around the house all day.

But Eren notices it, of course, and doesn’t miss the way Zeke practically keeps one eye on you the entire day, no matter who he’s talking to, either.

Maybe if Eren was just a drop stupider, a bit less cunning, you and Zeke could get away with all of it, but he’s not. He thinks it’s his turn to have his fun with you.

Your mother’s even more intolerable than he remembers. He wonders how bad a family dinner could be, but this is much worse than he could have fathomed. It’s a whole host of things, like how she’s oblivious to the affair happening right under her nose and her small comments that have your lips trembling and eyes blinking away tears before they can fall.

Jeez. Eren had initially felt bad for himself, but he’s starting to wonder how you put up with it. Maybe fucking around with Zeke is your own way of getting revenge, payback for every ‘Why do you look so tired, it’s not like you’re the one working all day’ and ‘Don’t you have plans with friends, or are you just gonna bother your parents all day?’

By the time dinner ends, you’ve made your way to the kitchen almost automatically, putting away dishes and wiping counters without even being told, as Zeke gives your mother a cold, hard stare.

“Was all that really necessary?” his brother questions quietly, eyes fuming with anger yet still disguising his true reason for being upset.

“What?” your mother responds innocently, pretending as though she hadn’t said anything wrong. Eren watches the interaction carefully. He thinks it’d be better if he didn’t interject on a married couple’s little spat, but here he goes again, words out before he can control them. They’re spoken a bit louder than they needed to be, but he wants to make sure you hear them over the running water.

“I don’t know, she seems like a good girl to me, no? Maybe you should be easier on her.”

And a few feet away, in the kitchen, your heart skips a beat. Uncle Eren—who you’d only met once and heard about a handful of times, someone who doesn’t owe you anything, someone not even really related to you—defending you?

It was enough to make tears rush to your eyes again, a smile on your face as you rinse off the dishes.

Good girl. The words run through your head again, seemingly on repeat. They’re your two favorite words, enough to pick you up from the dark, sullen headspace you’re in as a result of your mother’s cruel phrases and Zeke’s stinging silence.

Zeke claims it’ll become too obvious, even to your clueless mother, if he always takes your side and speaks up for you, despite how much he wants to, he says. You’re so hopelessly gone, so devoted to him that you don’t think you have it in you to fight for it. The words he says when the two of you are alone, how he makes you feel and spoils you rotten makes up for it, right?

That’s what you’d been telling yourself all this time, but you’re not sure how much longer you can keep the act going. Does he think it’s easy to watch him walk into the bedroom he shares with your mother every night? To watch her kiss him goodbye, hold onto his arm in public, while you trail behind like a lost puppy?

It’s not actually revenge you’re aiming for, when you start greeting Eren in the morning brightly, walking straight on over to him in the living room rather than the kitchen where your step-father is. It’s closer to a plea for attention, like you’re waiting for Zeke to realize you can play at this game too.

Eren’s more than happy to indulge you, spending hours of the day beside you on the couch watching movies, or watering the lawn while you work on your garden, claiming that he just wants to help out around the house as much as he can. His weekend-long visit turns into a week, as the ‘good for nothing contractors are taking their sweet time.’

It’s terribly easy to make you believe every word he’s saying, with you even defending him when Zeke asks how much longer he’s planning on sticking around.

“He’s family,” you had argued valiantly, leaving your step-father with narrowed eyes and a tense jaw as he noticed Eren smiling behind you. For once, your mother had agreed with you, and Zeke was left with no choice.

It’s sunny and warm when Eren’s opportunity, the one he’s been waiting for patiently, appears. Your mother’s gone out again, this time to the salon, there’s that hour of time right after she’s left that you usually treasure, because you know there’s no chance she’ll be on her way back or call home.

It’s usually your favorite time of the day, when you know you can have Zeke all to yourself, and that’s what you’re thinking, when you hesitantly make your way to the door of his office.

Truly, you hadn’t meant to make Zeke angry, you just wanted to be there for Uncle Eren how he was there for you. You were ready to make up and forget about it now, dolled up in a new sundress that you hadn’t gotten a chance to wear yet. Zeke had bought it only weeks ago, before Uncle Eren’s sudden visit, and you thought he might like it if you wore it now.

Your hand has just reached the cool metal of the doorknob, just about to twist when you hear a ringing from inside the room, of Zeke’s phone going off.

You step back, knowing better than to interrupt one of his calls. You’re disheartened a little, mind wondering why he would schedule something when you and he both know this is your hour, your chance to be alone.

You make your way back downstairs, lingering on the last step and thinking about going back up in a few minutes, when Uncle Eren’s voice calls to you from the living room, making you jump a little.

“Oh, sorry, sweetheart, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he says, voice calm and quiet, a contrast to your thudding heart.

“That’s okay, Uncle Eren,” you say, and your head turns back to look in the direction of Zeke’s office inadvertently. “I was just-”

“Waiting for Daddy, huh?” Your lips part a little in surprise, confused by his implication. Though surely, Zeke wouldn’t have told Uncle Eren anything. No, he wouldn’t do that.

Right?

“I-I just needed to ask him something, but I think he’s on the phone with someone,” you say quietly, confused at Eren’s tone, the confidence with which he spoke those words, almost mockingly.

“Oh, yeah. He told me he’s busy all afternoon, something or other about work and a report-” Eren stops himself right when he notices your expression change, looking thoroughly upset that Zeke was busy when you were ripe for the taking. “He didn’t tell you about that?”

Fuel to the fire, maybe a bit too much, but Eren doesn’t care. Not as long as you keep it up, looking like a maimed little prey upon realizing that Daddy was too busy for you.

Yes, Eren was getting much better with the lying. It doesn’t even register to you to question his words, to go back up and double check, that Zeke might, in fact, be waiting for you to knock on his door at this very second.

Your feet find their way to the sofa, slumping down dejectedly, as Eren sits right next to you. It’s the way you two have been sitting for the past week, except he’s ready to take the risk. His hand finds your knee, thumb rubbing the soft skin as you let out a shaky breath, wiping away a stray tear.

“All afternoon?” comes your quiet voice, trembling at the mere notion that Zeke was upset with you. You hadn’t meant to take it this far, hadn’t thought he would be ignoring you just because you disagreed with something he said for the first time.

But your sadness is turning into something different when you look at the hungry, almost predatory way Uncle Eren is looking at you now.

“That’s what he said, sweetheart. Did you two have plans, or something?” It’s coming off nonchalant, or so he hopes, because every bone in his body is excited at the prospect before him, blood rushing to his hardening cock as he catches a glimpse of your exposed skin as you fiddle with the hem of your dress.

“N-no, I just… He always spends time with me when mom leaves. I just thought he would be free.”

It’s the sweet, lonely way you’re looking into his eyes, your own doe-like and watery, that tips him over the edge.

“Well, I can keep you company.”

“R-really?”

“Yeah, baby. A sweet thing like you shouldn’t be left all alone… it’s not right, well, at least to me.”

“Yeah?” Eren nods his head, line between his lies and the truth blurring suddenly as you inch closer and closer to him.

“I wouldn’t treat you like that, if you were mine, you know-” and he can’t finish his sentence, because your hands are on the collar of his shirt and you’re shifting onto his lap, and your lips are on each other.

It’s stupid, you know, to be so easily guided by a few choice words, putty in virtually anyone’s hands if they say the right things and make you feel seen and heard, but you can’t stop now.

Eren’s tongue is in your mouth, your lips practically glued together as you feel his hands go under the soft cotton of your dress, exploring the supple skin of your thighs. It’s not long before his hands find your ass, squeezing and groping as moan into his mouth.

A sharp slap to your ass makes you yelp, pulling away for just a second before Eren’s hand is on the back of your neck, guiding you into a kiss again. You moan again, louder, when his teeth bite down on your lip just a little bit, when Eren finally pulls away.

“Can’t be too loud, remember, sweetheart? Daddy’s busy upstairs,” he says, somehow knowing exactly what would rile you up. The words act like a little shock running through your system, making you even more eager for Eren’s touch.

“Don’t care-!” you mewl, head going fuzzy when you feel Eren’s hard cock grind against your core, waves of pleasure rushing through your body. You’re still, Eren’s hand coming up to cover your mouth as he continues his rocking movement, making you moan against his hand.

Your eyes roll back when Eren increases his speed, and it’s silly, how the barely-there contact is making you shake, the coil in your stomach tense and unwinding, when Eren stops completely.

You whine loudly, muffled some by his hand, but not entirely, causing Eren to spank you again.

“I thought you were a good girl, hm? Don’t get bratty on me now,” he says, though he thinks it went in one ear and out the other as you come down from your incomplete high.

“I want-I want you, Uncle Eren, now-!” Another whine, another spank. You cry out again, until the fourth slap—which leaves your ass sore already from Eren’s heavy-handedness—silences you.

“Sweetheart, stop misbehaving or you’re not gonna get anything, okay?” he coos, fingers finding your chin and directing your face to look him in the eyes. They’re lust-blown too, and his hardness is still evident underneath your body, but your body’s inclined to follow his rules, despite how badly you want to cum.

“Yes, Uncle Eren,” you say softly, your squirming body finally stopping. Eren’s fingers find their way to the thin straps of your sundress, pulling them until they rest on your shoulder and expose your neck and collar to him.

“Tell me something, baby, did you wear this for me? Or for him?” The very mention of Zeke makes your body stiffen, but you’re still desperate for more and eager to please Uncle Eren.

“For you,” you mumble, wanting to just bury your head in the crook of Eren’s neck and feel him inside you, though you know you won’t get what you want that easily.

“Me? I’m so honored,” he says, letting out a laugh at how your body shakes in anticipation but you stay completely still. He wonders if Zeke had to teach you to be this obedient, or if it just comes to you naturally.

He thinks it’s the latter when he rolls his hips quickly, watching you squirm and bite your lip hard to keep quiet, another rush of pleasure coursing through you, though it’s not nearly enough.

“It’s okay, baby, you’ve been good enough to me, haven’t you?” he asks, and you nod your head quickly. “You deserve to feel good, don’t you?” You nod again and let out a shaky breath when Eren moves your hips with his hands, finally giving you the much-needed pressure on your clit.

“Why don’t you cum for me, baby, just like this? Mmh?” You’re letting out little squeals at each contact, hips moving faster and faster as Eren lays back and lets you use his cock as a toy to grind against. His head falls back at how good it feels, though he won’t let himself cum until he’s inside you.

You’re close again, stomach tensing again and that familiar feeling gathering inside your chest, making you feel warm all over as you speed up.

The breaking point is when Eren’s hands come to your chest, pulling down your dress and exposing your tits to the cool air. His fingers pinch one while his mouth finds the other, and suddenly you can’t keep quiet no matter how hard you try, moans spilling out your mouth as well as repeated cries of Uncle Eren, that sound sweet as sugar to Eren.

It’s when Eren starts bucking his hips up too, that you finally cum, a bolt of pleasure running through your entire body as he keeps going. You’re not entirely sure what kind of noises you’re making—everything seems to be muted and fuzzy as repeated shocks make you shake, Eren’s firm grip on your tits being the only thing that’s grounding you.

When you finally come down, forcing yourself away from Eren’s lap and legs pressed tightly together to calm your oversensitive cunt, there’s a lecherous look in Eren’s eyes. It’s screaming to you, silently, how he’s not done with you yet.

“Aw, baby, look how fast you came just from a little bit of humping. Are you that desperate, bunny? Is Daddy not taking care of you?”

Your face feels like it might be on fire, blood and heat rushing at the same time and burning quickly with shame at the realization that Eren knew all along, that he’s been playing this little game with you since his arrival and you never, not once, had the upper hand.

He feels more predatory than ever before, spreading your legs despite how your legs ache and your core is burning—even if you wanted more, you don’t think you could take it—but it doesn’t seem like Eren cares.

“U-uncle Eren, we shouldn’t- h-he might-” you start, but are cut off as Eren presses a finger to your lips.

“Sweetheart, isn’t that a little unfair? If you get to cum, and I don’t? Be a good girl and spread for me,” he says, and you feel your body comply automatically.

Your back’s on the couch now, Eren hovering over you. All it would take is a few steps in this direction after coming down the stairs for someone to find you, but you can hardly care when Eren’s shoving your dress up, exposing your panties and shoving them to the side, your wetness on display for him.

“One day, baby, when Daddy’s not here, I’m gonna fuck you stupid with my tongue—just not today,” and the words go straight to your head. Your heart thuds uncomfortably in your chest every time he mentions Zeke, a sense of guilt washing over you and replacing the pleasure you feel, but you forget all about it when you see Eren undos his pants and take out his hardened cock.

It’s plainly wrong to compare it to Zeke’s, and though it might not be longer, it’s definitely thicker, not as pretty but covered in throbbing veins that you can’t even imagine feeling inside you.

Eren’s about to grant your wish, running his cockhead over your sensitive clit once, twice, and just as you're expecting a third, he pushes inside of you.

A strangled, loud moan escapes your lips before he can cover your mouth again. It’s agonizing, not being able to make a sound as your step-uncle fucks you into the couch, movements picking up and a steady pace filling the room with obscene noises. You can’t see where the two of you are connected, since your eyes are locked with Eren’s pretty green ones, but you know you’re making a mess.

It’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before, every thrust stretching you out, you think he’s ruined your cunt for anyone else—but that’s exactly what he wants.

It’s silent, save for the heavy patter of Eren’s balls against your ass with each thrust, the sound of his hips knocking with yours. He’s trying to keep his grunts silent, but it’s getting harder and harder with the way you’re clenching around him, so tight and wet and soft, he wonders what his brother did to deserve someone like you—he wonders why he doesn’t spend every minute inside you.

Your sensitive cunt tightens around him, knowing only another few strokes and grazes on your clit will be enough to tip you into your second orgasm. Your shaky hand finds Eren’s, pulling his wrist away from your face and meeting his lips again, releasing muffled moans into his mouth.

You know he’s close too, from the way his pace picks up, and you pull away just for a second, just to say three words.

“Please, Uncle Eren.”

And it’s enough to make his hips stutter, enough to uncoil the knot in your tense stomach and have your orgasm washing over you, as you feel Eren fill your cunt with his hot cum. Your lips are on each other, the lewd squelching of his slowing thrusts matching the small squeaks you release, until he finally pulls out and your panties snap back over your leaking cunt.

It’s hard to catch your breath, from your position laying down, feeling your tight hole throb and Eren’s cum spill out, probably onto the sofa seat. You adjust the top of your dress, covering your tits and pulling one strap up. When you’re fixing the skirt, you feel Eren’s hands pull the other strap onto your shoulder, hands lingering on your exposed skin.

You shy away from looking at him, despite how his cum is still inside you. It feels too intimate, almost, because a part of you thinks you were taken advantage of, and another part of you doesn’t ever want Eren to leave you.

Eren’s fingers find your chin, forcing you to look up and meet his gaze. You blink quickly, licking your swollen lips and biting the inside of your cheek nervously.

Neither of you speak, though you know what’s lingering in the air. You can tell he’s gotten what he wanted, and he’s going to leave, and yet you can’t stop yourself from speaking first, throat scratchy and dry and your words nothing more than a whisper.

“C-can I… did you- did you mean all those things you said? Before?”

And suddenly Eren understands everything, why you’re this way, why you need to be validated so badly, why his brother’s such a good match for you. He thinks he’d sacrifice anything too, like his marriage and a new life, just to make you happy.

“Of course I did, sweetheart. I meant every word of it.”

“Really?” There’s a soft smile on your lips, your eyes watery and he thinks it doesn’t have anything to do with how hard he fucked you.

“Yeah, I-”

“Well, what do we have here?” Zeke’s voice comes from behind you.

#... uh yeah <3 step uncle eren #eren yeager #eren jaeger #eren yeager imagine #eren yeager smut #eren yeager x reader #eren x reader #eren smut #eren jaeger smut #eren jaeger imagine #eren jaeger x reader #aot #fics #tw step cest #tw dubcon

[imatechbummerliketomholland]

You are my world. you three are my world now - h.h

hello there! I'm back ! Sorry if it tooks so long, i have a lot of work during these holiday. I hope you like this little request. I didn't have time to be proofread (but a big thank you to@petersasteria who is always there to support me!). Remember that my native language is French, so don't be so mean if i made mistakes!

Feel free to like, share, comment and tell me what you think. Send me a message if you want to be added to the taglist for my next work!

Word count: 2300 Warning: angst, mention of pregnancy, small mention of blood, mention of placental abruption Pairing : harry holland Request: yes!

ღღღ

You didn't expect to be pregnant with twins at your age. The announcement of your pregnancy had also surprised more than one. Despite her support, Nikki Holland had still given the discourse on the importance of safe sex to her son. But Harry had given a more than mature speech in defense of both of you. He was able to prove to his family and to yours that you were ready and that the decision to continue the pregnancy was not rash.

You were now at the half of your eighth month and nothing could stand in the way of your happiness.

Nothing except maybe this.

Nikki had offered to have lunch with her this afternoon. Despite his work as a photographer, no longer having the company of his four children - since three of them left the family cocoon to live their own life as grown-up adults- weighed heavily on her. You accepted with pleasure. Harry, who was editing his third short film, had left you this morning to go to the edit suite, not without checking that you were okay. So, you joined Nikki at the restaurant. You shine in your long floral maternity dress. In the middle of the meal, you felt a violent contraction.

At almost eight months pregnant, it was no surprise that you could feel twins’ movements. You winced a little at the pain and your mother-in-law put a reassuring hand on your arm.

"Are you alright, darling?" she asking, a little bit worried.

"Yeah, yeah. They've just been in great shape for a few days now."

You apologized and went to the bathroom, struggling to cope with the pain of your contractions. When you noticed that your underwear was soaked with blood, your heart rate increased. You suddenly realized that a series of symptoms corresponded to what you had dreaded early in your pregnancy: the nausea that had occurred last night, the violent contractions since this morning and now the blood. Rather alerting signals that suggested a placental abruption. The obstetrician told you that this was a possible risk since you were having a twin pregnancy. You started to cry and panic for several minutes that Nikki ended up knocking on the bathroom door.

"Darling, is everything good in there?" she asked you with her sweet and worried voice.

"Could you come in please" you sobbed.

"Sure, darling. Are you sure you're feeling okay?"

She stepped carefully into the disabled cabin that you had used for space reasons. Nikki immediately noticed your state of stress. And you just told her everything in strangled sobs. She put a hand behind your back and gave you a very serious look.

"We have to go to the ER. We're going right away."

"I want Harry"

"Don't worry, I'll call him on the way"

And you haven't wasted a minute. Nikki simply left her phone number and table number at the counter before you got into your car. Dom will retrieve Nikki one's later. Holland family been known from the restaurant, the staff were comprehensive about your leaving without paid the bill. When you arrived at the hospital, the nurses greeted you directly and wasted no time either. You were taken to the operating room without being able to get your boyfriend's support.

☙♥❧

Harry arrived within fifteen minutes of receiving the call from his mother. No doubt he would receive a speeding penalty ticket later. He looked like a madman, mortified by worry. He was a bundle of nerves and sarcasm. Her mother was standing by the reception desk, waiting for her. She looked anxious. Tom was there too, trying to contact their father on his phone. When Dom finally picked up, the oldest Holland brother announced the urgency. Harry was shaking with worry.

"What happened mom?"

"I don't really know, baby. We were at the restaurant and the babies kicked. She went to the bathroom and when she didn't come back, I went after her. That's where she asked me to come into the bathroom and you know the rest. I called you straight after that. " Nikki explained, trying to get the stress out of her.

"Oh my god… where is she now?"

"The medical staff took her for surgery. I had to wait here. I couldn't go with her, baby. I’m so sorry."

"Ok ... Ok, I guess I have to wait here. Hope she's okay. God, please make her be alright."

They all made their way to the operating theater hallway for the public to wait for more information. Tom was still on the phone with his father, explaining that it would be better if he stayed at home with Paddy so as not to overcrowd the waiting room. He promised his father that they would all give news as soon as possible. A nurse in a surgical gown entered ten minutes later.

“Who's the father of miss y/l/n's babies?”

“I am. Harry Holland, I’m the father!” he almost screamed and cried at the same time.

“Come with me”

Nikki stood up cautiously and walked over to the nurse. Harry was ready to follow the nurse without giving any further information to his family.

"Excuse me. Can you give us more information on her condition?" Nikki asked

"Sure. We had an emergency caesarean. The babies are fine but there seem to be some complications with the mother. The surgeon is taking care of her."

"Is she going to be okay?" Harry asked hastily.

"She's losing a lot of blood but we're doing our best. Now please follow me." She said to curly one.

☙♥❧

Harry followed her to the nursery. His heart was pounding in mixed emotions. He was so impatient to meet his babies but at the same time he was worried about you. What if you don't survive from the complications? What was to become of him? Would he be able to live without you? Would he be a good father?

His last question vanished when he saw his two little babies in the incubator. Your twins had arrived about fifteen, almost a month earlier than expected, it was normal that they were in an incubator. Harry was going to have to make sure they put on weight. After filling out a few papers, one of the nurses offered to do some skin-to-skin contact with the twins so that they could get to know the three of them. Harry could not but be impatient with this and once prepared he settled into a seat. He was overcome with emotion, understanding how his parents had felt when Sam and him were born. He completely forgets the time, spending several minutes with his sons, one after the other. Harry knew he would place all his love in the two little beings he had taken turns holding in his arms. He was ready to lift mountains, cross the tides. Part of his mind was on you and he truly hoped he could go through life's trials with you. May your family experience all the times they deserve.

The nurse who had brought him to the nursery go up to him with a half-smile. She was sorry to disturb him during this privileged father-son moment.

"Your ... hm ... miss (y/l/n) is in the recovery room. You can go see her now"

Harry's heart burst with relief. He let out a sigh he didn't know he was holding back. The very new father nodded before placing his son in the nurse's arms so that she could put him back in the incubator. He decided to go find his family who had been waiting too long now. When he entered the waiting room, his mother and brother were still seated. Tom had his elbows on his knees, the phone in his hand. He seemed to be talking to someone. When the actor noticed his brother's presence, he spoke to him.

"Hey mate, Sam's here. Wanna talk to him? What's up? Does y/n's alright? And the twins?"

"Too much question. Give me Sam first!"

But the result was exactly the same. Sam asked the same questions as Tom and Harry winced as he tried to answer consensually.

"Hello to you too, brother. The twins are fine. I swear to God Sam, they look like a mini version of us. Two sons by the way ... y/n is fine, she's in the recovery room, I'm going see her right after that. I wanted to talk to mom and Tom first. "

"Glad to know I'm the last to know." Sam informed sarcastically.

"Hey, I was going to call you but I had to, you know ... go meet my sons. Father's job, it seems."

Sam chuckled behind his phone screen as Harry smirked in a mischievous and petty manner. He ended the call with his twin and turned to his mother and Tom. Nikki made her understand that she had heard, she seemed relieved that you were okay.

"Hey, before I go see y/n ... you want to see your grandsons ... and you, your nephew and godson, asshole."

"Harry, language" said Nikki.

"Of course I want to see my godson, stupid"

"Tom!"

The two brothers smile at each other. Just because one became a father and the other was a movie star, didn't mean they were going to change their ways. It was also their way, both of them, to decompress events. Nikki sighed in annoyance but kept quiet, too happy to meet, even only through a window, her first grandchildren. After a brief walk in front of the nursery, Harry announced that he was going to find you, leaving his family to admire your twins. They seemed so impatient to meet them in person but knew they were going to have to wait while you woke up.

☙♥❧

Harry entered the recovery room and walked over to your bed. You seemed to have already woken up from your artificial sleep. He grabbed your hand to give you the support you needed. A feeling of emptiness was felt in you, your gaze landed on your stomach, flatter than you had seen in recent months. Your eyes widened in panic but the reassuring pressure of Harry's hand drew your attention to him.

"They are fine, my love. They are fine. They are in an incubator in the nursery."

You burst into tears. The emotions being so strong.

"I'm so sorry Harry. I'm sorry ..."

“Hey… hey… you don't have to. You're okay… the twins are okay. And I still love you, I love you more than ever."

"Have you seen them?"

"Yes ... ugly like their father" he joked

You chuckled with a few more tears in your voice. You knew he didn't mean it, but humor was Harry's best way to decompress, and it worked on you too.

"My family is here. You scared the hell out of them. I think Sam was about to order a flight to kick your ass."

You chuckled again. It was so impressive to see the love that reigned in this family. You could never have asked for a better way to build your own family. Harry leaned over to kiss you.

"I love you, y/n. You are my world. you three are my world now"

"I love you more, Harry."

You stayed a few more days before you could get out of the hospital. You had decided to introduce the twins after their own discharge from the hospital. That's why, after almost a month of going back and forth to the nursery, you could finally bring your twins home. So you organized a little visit to Harry's parents.

☙♥❧

The sun was shining on London and you squeezed the doorknob of one of the maxi-cozy, Harry carrying your second son as you opened the door to the Holland family home. You were amazed at the ease with which Harry assumed his role as father. He was doing so well that you fell in love with him again.

"Is there anyone here?" He asked

"We're all in the garden, buddy!" Tom said

"You are obviously in the kitchen, dummy"

"For god's sake, Harry. Come into this fucking garden and let us see the twins!"

You let out a frank laugh as you mentally noted that you were going to have to have a conversation with Harry and his brothers about the vocabulary they were using.

You are therefore entering the garden. You noticed right away that Sam had come all the way from Scotland. Harry must have organized this with him too. You smiled, Nikki rushed over to help you with the change bags and you thanked him.

"So where is my godson?" Tom asked in the same way he did at the FFH premiere when he was looking for Jake Gyllenhal.

"Where's mine?" Sam asked too.

You approached Sam, putting the maxycosy on the table to unbuckle the seat belt and take your son in your arms. Harry was doing the same with your second baby.

"I'm happy to introduce you y/s/n"

"And there's y/s/n(2)." Harry added, so proud.

Everyone raved about the twins as you wipe away a tear, happy and proud. You were so moved by the love that reigned. Harry came to kiss you on the forehead, you closed your eyes, appeased by his gesture. The world could only turn better in his company.

"It's family portrait time!" Nikki said, her camera in her hands. "Tom, please get closer to your brother. Sam, stand next to y / n"

You all followed Nikki's instructions, who couldn't be more than happy to capture this important moment, bringing her work and family life together. You all smiled as you and Harry were in the center of the photo, carrying your twins in your arms. And at that moment, you were sure that your life could not be more beautiful than at this moment.

#harry holland #harry holland blurb #harry holland x reader #harry holland request #harry holland x y/n #holland family x reader

[foodieforthoughts]

Hi, my darling! I love your writing and I have a special ask for you: my birthday is in July 14th, a big and important holiday in France. So, how could it be if Henry brings me to Paris to celebrate my day (this is one of my biggest dreams)? (in case to describe the reader's physical characteristics I'd like it to be a plus size one, please ❤️) P.S.: Forgive my writing. English is not my mother language.

Honey! I know it has been ages since you sent this but now seems the perfect time. Happy birthday to you in advance sweetheart. 🤗❤️

Also, I only know about 14th of July celebrations from what's available on the internet, if I have made any mistakes I'm sorry about it. 🙈 Also, also, I haven't described the physical attributes of the reader. I hope that is okay. 😇

Title: Mon amour

You were pretty sure Henry was going to miss your birthday this year, what with him being away for filming and only a couple more hours until your birthday. But you were completely taken by surprise when he called, asking you to head out to the airport and pack whatever you deemed necessary.

"You are crazy, Henry!" You exclaimed on the phone, standing outside the airport in the night with a hurriedly packed bag. "What is happening?!"

"Hurry up, love." You nearly shrieked when out of nowhere Henry came up to you and grabbed your hand. Tugging you along to follow him, instructing you to take out your passport, Henry led you through the gate inside the airport.

It was only when you saw the boarding pass, your happiness knew no bounds as you realised he was taking you to Paris for your birthday.

Being in Paris for July 14th celebration, an important day called la fête nationale, was at the top of your bucket list. Henry explained how he had meant to come home one day prior but bad weather and some delays with filming had pushed his plans to the last minute. He had apologized for it but you assured him there wasn't any need for them. There was nothing to forgive, on the contrary, he got a big kiss and a tight hug when the plane took off. You were pretty sure your were floating to cloud nine even before the Eiffel Tower came into view.

Henry had left no stone unturned to make your stay special. A room in Shangri-la with an amazing view of the Seine river, complimented by the giant, wrought iron symbol of love for romantics, was already booked for next four days and decorated with balloons for your birthday. You felt your heart could burst with the surprises he had planned, unfolding one after another and making you teary eyed, only for Henry to take you in his arms and kiss the tears away.

"Good morning, love." He greeted you the next day, naked and still in bed with his arms around you. Running his hand through your hair and kissing your lips, Henry wished you a 'happy birthday' again.

Despite sleeping only for a few hours, both of you were eager to spend the day out and about it in the city. Henry had to try to blend in with the crowd, wearing a cap and casual clothes yet still managing to look like an adonis, making you laugh when he hung the DSLR from his shoulder. Luckily for him with the moustache he had going on for his upcoming movie, he looked almost, if not entirely, unrecognizable.

After watching the military parade in Champs-Elysées, he took you for a dessert splurge around the avenue. From all the crêpes, éclairs, madeleines and macarons, you were getting a sugar rush, joking and laughing with a constantly soaring high. Since Henry was on a strict diet, he only had taken a small bite from your crêpe, sitting and listening to you, amused at the sheer level of your excitement.

Lucky for you, before you could go on a downward spiral from the drop in blood sugar, Henry got you hydrated and tucked in the bed for a nap. You had protested initially, but all your complains vanished when he started kissing you and whispering in your ear in his low, gruff voice, how much he had missed you.

It wasn't until late afternoon that you finally woke up to find Henry in the balcony, sipping on tea and basking in the evening sunlight. You sneaked up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist and taking in a deep breath of his scent while resting your face against his taut back.

"How did I ever become so lucky to have you in my life?" You mumbled against his shirt, smiling to yourself as you said it.

"I am the lucky one to find you." He placed the cup on the railing, twisting to pull you to stand in front of him. Trapping you in between his arms, he kissed your nose causing his moustache to tickle your skin and make you giggle.

You sighed happily, throwing your arms around his neck and running your hand through his hair. Gazing at him with a smile, you were mesmerized by his captivating blue eyes like it had been the very first time.

"We better start getting ready to head out again." He caressed your cheek with his thumb as he spoke.

"Yeah? We could stay in though. Maybe continue from when you stopped in the afternoon?" You winked at him, making him chuckle.

"Later tonight, baby. I have one more thing planned for you."

When you stepped inside the Bateaux Parisiens, you knew why Henry had asked you to pack 'something fancy'. Donning a sleek blazer suit himself, Henry looked dashing as always. Live music playing in the background, an elegant menu of scrumptious food, glasses of Champagne Jacquart Brut Mosaïque, accompanied by the love of your life while cruising down the river with magnificent view of the city on both sides, you knew dinner couldn't have been any more lavish than this. Henry was recognised by few, approached for photos which Henry would have generally declined but you insisted he should go for it. Their smiling faces and elated shrieks only somehow lifted up your spirits even more.

When the boat stopped near the Eiffel Tower with only a few minutes until the fireworks display, Henry grabbed your hand and took you up to the deck. It was already crowded but he managed to find a spot at the far end of the boat. He draped an arm around your shoulder, yours enveloping his waist as you waited for the fireworks to start.

Everything about your birthday was perfect. You were brought to tears as the vibrant colours of the fireworks glowed in the night sky. Henry hugged you closer, kissing the top of your head and watched the beautiful display with you.

Through the crackle of the fireworks, glimmer of the colours sparkling in his eyes, you stood on your tiptoes to kiss his soft lips.

"Thank you for making this day special, Henry." You whispered in his ears, placing another kiss on his cheek.

"Special day for a special lady." He winked at you, before leaning down to kiss you deeply.

#henry cavill requests #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill x you #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill fluff #henry cavill rpf #henry cavill

[nerdzzone]

Once Bitten - Twice Shy

Summary: Raising a child is hard. Raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars is even harder. And raising a child with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars who you’re not actually in a relationship with is even harder still.

One of the challenges of sharing custody is sharing holidays which is something that Whitney Taylor found herself struggling with in the December of 2019. The prospect of spending Christmas without her son was dismaying, but the complications that come with the alternative might be even harder to face.

Chris Evans x OFC

Part One

----

Part Two

25.12.19

When I woke up in the morning, it took me a moment to figure out where I was and why the pillow my head was resting on was so hard and warm. Once I'd figured it out - that my head was not actually on a pillow, but on Chris' chest - I almost had to roll my eyes. Of course it was. Of course we'd ended up all cuddled together. Because life was just one big romantic comedy, right?

I sighed quietly, silently praying that Chris wasn't awake yet as I slowly slid myself away from him. He didn't stir until I was sitting on the edge of the bed so I was hopeful that he hadn't been aware of the position we were in.

"G'morning," he greeted me, rubbing his eyes as the sound of excited children echoed down the hallway. "What time is it?"

I quickly checked my phone on the nightstand before answering.

"Only seven o'clock," I told him before yawning. "But it sounds like everyone is up and bouncing off the walls already."

"I'm not surprised," Chris smiled. "They've probably torn into all the presents by now."

I laughed and nodded my head, knowing it was a good possibility.

"It probably wasn't super smart to leave Scott out there guarding them by himself," I pointed out. "Not after he spent half the night shaking his own presents trying to guess what was inside."

"Oh, it definitely wasn't," Chris agreed. "He was always the one who ruined things by finding his presents early and getting us all in trouble."

"Well, I should go see what they're up to or if anything can be salvaged," I smiled as I pulled a sweater on over my pyjamas. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be out in a minute," he assured me. I headed to the door, but stopped when I heard his voice again. "Hey, Whitney? Merry Christmas."

I smiled even wider as that happy, familiar Christmas morning feeling washed over me.

"Merry Christmas, Chris."

With that, I hurried out the door, trying not to focus too much on how content I felt and how right it seemed to wake up in his arms on Christmas morning.

-

When I got to the kitchen, I was surprised to see that everyone else was already awake, despite how early it was.

"Good morning," Lisa greeted me as I wandered into the kitchen where all the adults were congregating. "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, everyone," I smiled before they all repeated it back to me. "Did I miss all the fun?"

"No, of course not," Carly assured me. "We've managed to keep them away from the presents so far, but I'm not sure how much longer we can hold them off."

"We're still waiting for Chris though," Scott pointed out as I grabbed a clean mug and headed to the fresh pot of coffee on the counter. "Have you seen him? He disappeared not long after we went to bed and never came back."

"Oh, yeah, he's in his room," I answered mindlessly as I filled my mug. "We ended up sleeping together last night."

I heard Scott almost choke on his coffee and noticed the sudden silence in the room, but it wasn't until Lisa spoke that I realized what I'd said.

"Whitney, honey," she said, speaking softly. "What do you mean?"

"Oh my god, no! Not like that!" I rushed to explain as my cheeks grew hot. "We literally slept together, like as in slept next to each other. Chris came into his room looking for a sweater because he was cold and had given away all his spare blankets so I offered for him to share the bed with me. That's all, I swear."

There were knowing smiles amongst the group and I wasn't entirely sure that they all believed me which made things even more embarrassing as I wouldn't want them to think I'd talk so candidly about things like that with Chris' mother of all people. Before I had a chance to continue desperately defending myself though, a voice from the doorway interrupted.

"What are you swearing about?" He asked, leaning against the doorway. "Why do I feel like I missed something good?"

Again, I was ready to explain, but someone beat me to it.

"Whitney was just giving us the update," Scott informed his older brother as he matched his smirk. "She was telling us how you two slept together."

Chris' eyebrows knitted together in confusion for a moment before he relaxed and let out a chuckle.

"Well, that's not exactly how I would have phrased it," he informed the group with a shrug. "But I suppose it is accurate. We slept and we were together."

"I just misspoke," I groaned. "I haven't had any coffee yet, I wasn't thinking clearly."

"A little Freudian slip?" Carly suggested as she joined in on the teasing, but I simply rolled my eyes.

"Chris probably wishes that was a peak into my subconscious desires, but I'm afraid not. Just a clear sign that I am not a morning person."

"I think we'll all need plenty of coffee to deal with the energy in that living room," Lisa interjected, putting an end to the discussion despite Chris' protests of my claim. "But we should probably go and join them before they open all the presents, whether they belong to them or not."

We all murmured in agreement and everyone topped up whatever beverage they were drinking before we headed to the living room to start the Christmas fun.

-

"Mama!" Grayson shouted as we entered the room. "Look! Santa came!"

"Of course he did," I smiled at the children. "You've all been good this year so it's no surprise."

They all nodded and agreed enthusiastically except Ethan who, now that he was almost ten, had figured out the truth. He was a good kid though and a loving older brother so he kept the secret, quietly watching them with a knowing smile now that he was finally in on the joke with the adults.

"Can we open them?" Stella asked, bouncing up and down from holding in her excitement. "We've been waiting for so long!"

"I wouldn't say so long," Scott chuckled. "Since it's not even eight o'clock in the morning yet!"

"But, yes, you can open them," Carly informed her children. "Just be careful and don't rush."

There was a flurry of activity as the kids dove into the presents, organizing whose was whose before settling down next to their little piles. I took a step back and sat on the couch next to Lisa, letting Chris sit on the floor behind Grayson. It was his Christmas after all and it felt right that he should be the one helping him open presents. Plus, this way I got a perfect view of the joyful grin that was plastered on his face. A grin that was perfectly replicated by his father behind him making my heart clench at the sight of them together like this.

I watched from my spot on the couch as the gifts were opened one by one and soaked in every giggle and shriek of glee from the children. Grayson was on top of the world and so grateful for each and every gift, it was delightful to see. Given our financial security, especially for Chris, it would have been easy to spoil him, but it made me incredibly proud to see how gracious he was.

However, one of the last gifts he wasn't so grateful to receive. It was from me and I knew there was a chance it wouldn't be his favourite, but his response was far worse than I could have imagined.

It was a decent sized box and he tore off the wrapping paper eagerly, intrigued by what could be inside. When he revealed that it was a foot and a half tall electronic T-Rex, his first reaction was one of amazement.

"Wow! A dinosaur!"

"Yeah," I smiled. "Take him out and see what he can do."

Chris set to work helping Grayson open the box before glancing up at me.

"Does he need batteries?"

"I put some in already," I assured him. "I knew he'd want to see it right away so I thought it would be easier."

He nodded as Grayson placed the giant T-Rex on the floor and looked at me expectantly.

"There's a button on his back, press it."

Everyone watched as he poked around until he got the right spot and the dinosaur came to life. He roared and his head moved around, but as the older kids cheered and clapped, Grayson burst into tears.

"Oh, dear..." Lisa smiled as she watched her grandson leap into his father's arms.

Everyone was chuckling at his dramatic reaction as Grayson buried his face in Chris' neck.

"Awe, buddy, I'm sorry!" I apologized. "Did it scare you?"

"Yes! He's scary!" Grayson's response was muffled by Chris' body and hard to understand through his sobs. "I don't wike it, Mama!"

I smiled at the little speech impediment that he inherited from his father - much like the one his cousin, Miles, had - but I did feel bad for how genuinely afraid he was.

"I'm sorry, baby. We can take the batteries out, okay? Then he won't be able to move."

The dinosaur had stopped moving on his own before I spoke and Grayson moved his head from where he was hiding his face, nodding as he did so.

"Yes, please."

"I bought it a while ago, thinking it was the perfect gift and then last week, he suddenly decided that T-Rexes were mean and I thought it might not go down so well," I admitted to the adults as I stretched forward to pick up the dinosaur and take the batteries out. "It's such a shame though, I think he's adorable. If you press the button on his tail, a little song plays and he does a little wiggle dance."

Chris smirked at me as he rubbed our still sniffling son's back.

"Why don't you take him home? Sounds like you might enjoy playing with him when Grayson isn't around."

He was making fun of me, I knew he was, but I didn't take the bait.

"You know what? I might just do that."

Chris opened his mouth to most likely make another teasing comment, but Ethan interrupted him.

"If Grayson doesn't want the T-Rex, can I have it?"

"I think you got enough new toys this morning," Ethan's dad warned him. "Don't be greedy."

"We'll let Grayson keep him for now," Chris agreed. "He might get used to him after a while if he plays with him without the batteries."

I passed the toy in question back to Chris and Grayson cowered away, whimpering against his dad's chest.

"Just leave it for now," I suggested. "We can try it again later when the initial shock has worn off."

Chris nodded and put the dinosaur behind his back and out of sight.

-

The rest of the gift opening went by smoothly and no more children were traumatized. Once every gift that was under the tree had been opened, we left the kids to test out their new things while the adults headed to the kitchen to start making breakfast. It was quickly decided that pancakes would be the easiest thing to mass produce for our large group of hungry people and while Lisa, Carly and I started mixing up a few bowls of batter, Chris and Scott whipped out the orange juice and champagne for mimosas.

An hour later everyone was very full and we were two bottles of champagne down.

"So, Whitney," Scott started as he loaded up the dishwasher. "Are you staying here tonight too or are you planning on making us spend half the day shovelling the driveway for you?"

His tone was teasing, but as I looked out the window at the deep blanket of snow that covered the ground outside, I was torn. I didn't want to outstay my welcome by staying another night, but I also didn't want to make the Evans family spend their entire Christmas day shovelling snow and there was no way that I'd be able to do it by myself.

"I'm not sure," I admitted. "I wasn't planning on staying another night, but it does look like there's a lot of snow out there..."

"Just stay," Chris shrugged. "Even if we can get your car down the driveway, the roads are probably terrible."

"There's no need for you to rush off," Lisa agreed. "Stay another night and then you can just relax and enjoy the day."

"And you can drink if you're not driving home," Scott pointed out with a grin. "Chris and I stocked up on wine, beer, whiskey and gin, these mimosas were just the start of the party."

I couldn't help, but laugh at Scott's reasoning as I nodded my head.

"Alright, I'll stay. If you really don't mind, Chris?"

"Of course not," Chris assured me. "We're happy to have you."

"Great!" Scott grinned. "I'm glad that's settled, I think this calls for another round of drinks!"

Chris cheered and jumped up to help him while the rest of us smiled and shook our heads at their antics.

-

The day was spent soaking in quality family time, watching the kids enjoy their new toys and indulging in lots of food and drink. We called Chris' dad and my parents and even had an unexpected phone call from my Uncle Rob. He spent more time talking to Chris than me, his own niece, but it was nice to hear his voice even if he made sure to get a dig in about me confessing my supposedly obvious feelings to Chris.

Sitting around the table, eating a delicious meal with Chris' loving and welcoming family was quite a contrast to how I expected to spend the day and I was very grateful that Chris had included me. Grayson seemed to appreciate it too and he made his enjoyment clear as we tucked him into bed once all the fun and feasting was done.

Chris sat on the floor leaning against Grayson's nightstand, reading him his favourite bedtime story while I laid on the bed next to him and rubbed his back. He was drifting off by the time the story was finished, but he was fighting it desperately as he spoke again.

"I'm happy, Mama," he told us, his words muffled as he nuzzled into his pillow.

Chris put his hand over his heart as he mouthed an 'awe' at me and I smiled.

"You're happy?" I clarified quietly, my smile growing as he nodded. "I'm glad to hear that, baby."

"I like that you're here," he mumbled. "Daddy should come home with us too."

My heart clenched at that request as my smile faltered. I knew it was only a matter of time until Grayson paid more attention to the fact that his time was divided between two homes, but I wasn't ready to deal with it just yet.

"Maybe Daddy could come for a sleepover sometime," I suggested, stroking his hair back out of his face, but that wasn't all he wanted.

"He should come all the time."

I was never great at hiding my emotions and from the way Chris was watching me, I assumed my distress at Grayson's comments was written all over my face and I was grateful when he jumped into the conversation.

"But what about Dodger?"

Dodger's ears perked up from his spot at the end of the bed, but he settled again when he realized that Chris wasn't calling for him.

"He can come too," was Grayson's answer to that dilemma, but Chris had a response at the ready.

"C'mon, you think Dodger would have enough space in your Ma's apartment?" He asked. "He needs a big house like this to run around in!"

So then we could all just stay here would be the logical comeback to that, but it seemed our sleepy little guy was too tuckered out from the excitement to argue. He let out a little sigh of defeat, but said no more. We stayed quiet for a few minutes until his breathing shifted and he was soundly asleep.

Chris offered me his hand to help me climb over Grayson without waking him up and, after whispering a quiet request to Dodger to keep our boy safe, he led me out of the room.

"You okay?"

The question came as soon as Grayson's door was pulled to and we were in the hallway.

"Yeah, of course," I nodded, forcing a smile. "Why wouldn't I be?"

Chris shot me a look that clearly showed his disbelief.

"You looked pretty downhearted in there."

"I just worry," I shrugged. "I don't want our situation to upset him and I know he's going to notice it more as he gets older."

"He'll be fine," Chris assured me, reaching out to squeeze my shoulder comfortingly. "He's got so much love in his life, he won't even notice that his family is a little different."

I wasn't convinced. He was obviously already noticing or he wouldn't have questioned it only moments before. I didn't want to start such a delicate, potentially tense conversation at the end of such a happy day though so I forced a more convincing smile onto my face.

"You're right," I agreed. "But I wouldn't be a mom if I didn't worry."

"Well, there's no time for worryin' on Christmas!" Chris claimed, followed by a grin as he dragged me off towards the kitchen. "What can I get you? Another wine? Maybe some gin? I might have some tequila kickin' around here somewhere..."

"No! No tequila!" I laughed. "Gin would be great, thanks."

Chris nodded and set to work mixing our beverages for the evening before we went to the living room to rejoin his family and I did my best to push any worries about letting Grayson down out of my mind.

-

After the kids were all in bed, the rest of the evening was spent playing games and sharing drinks. It was heartwarming, wholesome family fun and I was so glad that Scott had encouraged me to stay as the thought of rushing home to my cold, empty apartment wasn't at all appealing.

The only strange thing about the evening was Chris. We were teamed up for most of the games and it was quite amazing how in tune with each other we were as we won everything by a landslide. We'd been friends for a long time and knew each other very well so it was unsurprising to me that we had so much success, but the teasing comments that came from a rather drunk Scott implied other reasons than friendship for our harmony. I scoffed and rolled my eyes every time he cracked a joke about us, but Chris seemed to love it. He was a few drinks in and probably just feeling a little goofy, but the grin on his face after every suggestive comment sparked an odd feeling in my stomach.

It was around ten o'clock when everyone except Chris, Scott and I decided to go to bed. We bid them goodnight and Chris went to top up our drinks before settling back onto the couch beside me. By this time, I was definitely feeling it. I wasn't drunk, but I knew this drink would have to be my last as the flush of my cheeks and the happy, fuzzy feeling in my brain was telling me that it was time to wind it down for the night.

However, as Chris handed me another gin and soda, settled on the couch next to me, placed his drink on the end table beside him and pulled my feet into his lap, my mind suddenly felt surprisingly sharp.

"What are you doing?" I asked, a giggle slipping from my lips.

"Releasing some tension."

As he answered, he began a slow massage of my left foot and I couldn't help, but smile at how wonderful it felt.

"Releasing?" Scott snorted a laugh. "Sure, a foot rub is known for getting rid of tension, not making it worse."

Chris smirked at what Scott was insinuating, but seemed unbothered by it.

"Don't be jealous," he teased, but now it was my turn to smirk.

"Of what?" I questioned. "This foot rub? It's not that great, Scott."

Scott laughed as Chris gasped a tad over dramatically.

"Not that great? I offer you a free foot rub and you can't even be fuckin' grateful?"

Chris shook his head, but the smile on his face told me that he wasn't really offended. He did stop massaging my feet though and I whined in protest as he picked up his drink.

"A mediocre foot rub is better than nothing," I pouted. "Keep going."

Chris sipped his whiskey, the smile on his face morphing back into a smirk as he shook his head again, but he did let his hand rest over my ankles and I was happy for even that tiny bit of contact.

Scott changed the subject to some viral video he saw the other day and Chris laughed and chatted along as he absentmindedly let his hand drift up my shin, underneath the loose pyjama pants that I'd changed into shortly after we put Grayson to bed.

My mind was instantly taken back to another time when we'd shared such gentle touches. A time when his lips followed his fingers as they traced kisses up from my ankle all the way to the lacy edge of my underwear. A time when he'd then proceeded to pull that underwear off with his teeth before returning his face back to a very sensitive area.

"Whitney, have you seen it?"

Scott's question snapped me out of my racy daydream. I felt my cheeks flush with colour as I forced my gaze away from Chris' hand over to Scott, reminding myself that even though the look on Chris' face would make it seem otherwise, he couldn't possibly know what I was just thinking of.

"Uh, no, I haven't," I admitted, sipping my drink to try to cool myself down even though it was becoming apparent to me that I needed to slow down my alcohol consumption. "All I seem to watch these days is Paw Patrol."

Chris barked out a laugh and nodded.

"So much Paw Patrol," he agreed. "The kid's obsessed."

"Chase is on the case!" I giggled before changing my voice slightly. "Rubble on the double!"

"Oh my god," Scott laughed, a horrified look on his face. "We need to get you out more."

I shrugged as Chris continued to trace patterns on my shins.

"That's the life of a mom."

"Yeah, but what about when he's with Chris? You must have some sort of life then."

"Scott."

Chris' voice was harsh and warning as what Scott was implying could be taken as offensive, but I wasn't bothered.

"It's fine," I assured him. "I know I'm lame. I don't have much of my own life, I don't really know anyone around here."

"You have Allison," Chris pointed out. "You've mentioned her a lot. She's your friend, right?"

He was referring to my one and only friend in Massachusetts. She was also a photographer and we'd met at a camera store when I first moved here. She'd asked me a question about a new brand of film and we'd ended up having coffee to exchange tips. She realized quickly that I didn't know many people in town and had taken me under her wing.

"She is," I nodded. "But she has three kids of her own and she's married so she doesn't have weeks where she's child free like I do. We hang out when we can, but usually it's with all the kids, not like quality 'girl time'."

"I didn't know that," Chris frowned. "I'm sorry..."

"Don't feel bad for me." I nudged him with my foot. "I have plenty of friends, they're just in LA. I'm happy here."

"I'll take you out for drinks one day," Scott promised. "Even if you're happy, everyone needs to let their hair down a little bit sometimes."

"That would be fun," I smiled, tossing back the last of my drink. "But for now, I think I've let my hair down enough for today. It's time for me to get to bed before all these drinks go to my head."

I slid my feet off of Chris' lap and slowly stood up as he looked up at me.

"Are you cool if I bunk with you again tonight?"

"Of course," I nodded. "Just sneak in quietly if you two stay up too late."

"I'm ready to crash already," Scott informed us. "So, we won't be up much later."

"Okay. Well, goodnight boys," I waved as I headed towards the door. "Thank you for a lovely day."

They chorused a goodnight back to me before I walked down the hall.

-

I was just coming out of the en suite in Chris' bedroom after brushing my teeth when Chris strolled into the room.

"Hey," I smiled. "Ready for bed already?"

"Scott wasn't lying," he returned my smile. "He was half asleep by the time you made it down the hall."

I laughed as I crawled into bed and settled against the pillows.

"Well, it has been a busy day."

Chris agreed as he grabbed his pyjama pants and headed to the bathroom. I picked up my phone from where I left it on the nightstand, turned off the lamp on my side of the bed and answered a few text messages from my family, figuring I may as well wait the few minutes it would take Chris to get ready for bed before I attempted to get any sleep. When Chris reappeared, I locked my phone again, put it back on the nightstand and snuggled down under the blankets, trying not to stare too much at his chiselled torso. He wasted no time turning off the lamp on his side as well before slipping in next to me, shivering dramatically as he pulled the blankets up over his chest.

"It's so freakin' cold tonight."

I snorted a laugh, shaking my head even though I knew he wouldn't be able to see me until our eyes adjusted to the dark.

"Maybe if you put on a shirt you wouldn't feel it so much."

"Honestly," Chris started, the smirk evident in his tone despite his face still being hidden in shadow. "Usually, I just sleep naked so these pants are for your benefit."

I felt my cheeks flush as the words 'then by all means, take them off' were on the tip of my tongue. I forced them out of my mind as a long forgotten tingle rolled through my body and I focused on answering him.

"My point was that a t-shirt would provide you with extra warmth," I explained. "So, your point that you usually wear less clothing makes no sense."

The bed shifted slightly as Chris chuckled.

"Well, I can think of another thing that could provide some extra warmth."

"What?"

I felt my heart rate pick up, the blood rushing through my ears so fast that I hardly heard myself answer him as I wondered if he could possibly be implying what it seemed like he was implying.

"You." His voice was low, the same seductive tone he'd used all those years ago, and I felt my mouth go dry. "Come give me a cuddle."

For a moment, I thought I was a lot drunker than I'd realized and that I was hallucinating or in some kind of lucid dream, but that thought brought me to a different realization.

"Chris!" I whispered, my tone scolding and accusatory. "You're drunk!"

A burst of laughter came from the other side of the bed and I quickly shushed him, knowing Grayson was asleep in the room above us.

"I'm not drunk, I promise," Chris assured me as his raucous laughter came under control. "I just thought it was worth a shot. It's nice to have a little cuddle with a beautiful woman sometimes."

I felt another flush of heat run through me, but I rolled my eyes and, as I had the night before, I took a pillow and placed it between us, drawing a clear line in the sand even if that hadn't worked out so well the last time.

"Goodnight, Chris."

"Goodnight, Whitney."

I rolled over, closed my eyes and tried to sleep.

I did try. I really, really did.

But after almost ten minutes of thoughts whirring through my head, I knew it was hopeless and I turned back to face Chris. Now that my eyes had adjusted to the dark, I could see well enough to know that he was laying on his back so I carefully moved the pillow that I'd placed between us and slowly slid over towards him. I felt him tense so I knew he was awake, but he didn't question what I was doing so I continued until my head was on his chest and my arm was draped over his stomach. He stayed perfectly still, just long enough for me to start second guessing myself before he shifted slightly to put his arm around me.

We stayed like that, holding each other in silence, and I had to admit that Chris was right. It was nice to have someone to cuddle with. The physical contact was filling a hole in my touch-starved heart and I tried not to think about how fleeting of a moment it was or how things would be back to normal in the light of day. There was a strange ache in my heart at that thought and I knew I needed to get out of my head.

"Chris?" My voice was soft, just in case he'd drifted off in the last few minutes, but when he tightened his grip on me, I knew he was still awake. "Thank you for inviting me today."

"Of course." He squeezed a little tighter. "I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner."

"It's fine," I assured him, letting my hand lazily trace patterns on his skin. "You're under no obligation, you're allowed your time with Grayson without me."

"It's not about obligation. I'd never want you to spend Christmas alone even if Grayson wasn't in the picture."

"I was really dreading it."

My admission made me feel vulnerable as I'd spent so long trying to pretend that I wasn't bothered by the idea of a lonely holiday, but Chris didn't seem surprised.

"Really?" He questioned, his tone dripping with sarcasm. "The crying onto your steering wheel didn't give that away at all."

"Shut up," I mumbled, turning my face into his chest to hide my smile at his teasing. "I'm just trying to express my gratitude for your kindness."

"No gratitude is needed. It's been my pleasure having you here today and Grayson loved it."

He kissed the top of my head after he'd finished speaking and almost reflexively, I found myself stretching up and placing a soft kiss of my own against his collarbone. It felt intimate and the moment hung heavy between us. It felt right to me, but I knew instantly that I'd crossed a line. A comforting kiss on the top of my head was one thing, but what I'd done, kissing his bare chest, was inappropriate. My cheeks burned as I tilted my head up to look at him, meeting his eyes as they looked down at me. His expression was unreadable so I opened my mouth to apologize only to be completely shocked when he pressed his head forward and his lips against mine.

The shock quickly morphed into a feeling that could only be described as euphoria. There was something distantly familiar about the way his mouth moved on mine, but it felt strange and new as it wasn't exactly as I'd remembered - and I had spent more time than I'd want to admit reliving the last time we'd shared a kiss like this.

It wasn't until he pressed his tongue against my lips, in an attempt to deepen the kiss, that I snapped out of my daze.

"Chris, wait," I breathed out as I pulled away and stared up at him, my cheeks now flushed much more from excitement than embarrassment. "We shouldn't do this."

"Says who?"

The little voice in my head telling me that I'm about to ruin everything that we've worked hard to create. The words were on the tip of my tongue, but as he smirked down at me and licked his lips as if he was preparing for what was to come, I found myself incapable of logic and reason.

"Doesn't matter."

Chris hardly had time to acknowledge my answer before I dove back in for another kiss, moving to a more comfortable position as I straddled his waist.

He completely overwhelmed my senses. The inescapable scent of him surrounding me, the feel of his strong body between my thighs and the soft little sighs of enjoyment that he kept making every time our lips parted for us to take a breath. None of it was doing anything to ease the ache that was growing between my legs and my hands gripped into the sheets where they rested just above his shoulders as I pulled back to look down at him. I needed to see his face to remind myself this was really happening and who it was really happening with as it still felt so unreal.

Chris smiled up at me, his lips looking plumper already, and let his hands settle on my hips to keep me steady.

"You okay?"

I nodded and leaned down to peck his lips again before answering.

"I've never been better."

Chris' smile only widened at that confirmation and he moved his hands down to cup my bum, pressing my hips forward and giving me a moment of friction that I'd been desperately craving. I pressed myself up, pulling my upper body away from him as a gasp fell from my lips and my eyes squeezed shut. I was embarrassingly aroused from a few mere minutes of kisses, but it had been a very long time since I'd had any physical contact with a man and my body was already on fire.

I rocked my hips against the toned muscles of his abdomen, soaking in the pleasure that was radiating through me and I was debating whether it would be rude of me to continue until I reached the release that was quickly building inside me. Clearly, Chris was just as intuitive as I remembered as he let out a groan and effortlessly flipped us over so he was on top.

"Not like that," he smirked. "I've been thinking about this for too long, it's not happening like that."

I felt another flush of embarrassment as he could obviously tell what I'd been thinking about doing, but I nodded in agreement.

"But if this is really happening, we need to be quiet," I reminded him. "Everyone's sleeping."

"They're all upstairs, they won't hear," he assured me. "And Scott's on the other side of the house."

He was right, we'd be fine as long as we kept ourselves under control, but it didn't matter anyway as all my doubts disappeared when his lips pressed against my neck. I let my hands slide around his waist, resting on his toned back while his lips continued their trail down my neck and stretched the neck line of my shirt to expose my shoulder. His lips locked onto one spot just above my collarbone, sucking and nipping until I was sure there would be a bruise there in the morning.

"Chris," I gasped out, digging my fingernails into his back. "Don't leave a mark."

He backed off a bit, kissing gently against the now sensitive skin.

"It'll be easy to hide," he assured me. "And if I remember correctly, you enjoyed a few bites here and there..."

He opened his mouth to dig his teeth into my shoulder and an image flashed into my mind. A memory of me, bent over with Chris' thumb on my clit as the two fingers he had inside me stroked a particularly delicate spot. He'd placed a soft kiss on the cheek of my bum before sinking his teeth into my skin, sending me over the edge.

I couldn't help, but moan from the combination of the memory and the sensation of his teeth in my shoulder as my hips pressed up against his. Chris seemed to be spurred on by that action as he ground his hips against mine and quickly let his hands slide down to the bottom of my shirt. He lifted it up and for a moment I was lost in the bliss of the sensations he was providing, but as my shirt was raised just past my belly button, I froze.

"Wait!"

My voice firm and demanding and he immediately responded, stopping his actions and looking up to meet my eyes.

"What's wrong?"

I bit my bottom lip as I pondered how to voice my concerns. If I didn't say anything, there was a chance that we could get through this without drawing any attention to it, but I couldn't help but think it was better to point it out than have Chris notice on his own.

"I just..." I breathed out, trying to figure out how to articulate my thoughts. "I just look different now."

"What?"

Chris pulled back even further, looking down at me with genuine confusion in his eyes and my cheeks burned as I tried to puzzle out how to explain my feelings in a way that didn't make me look shockingly insecure.

"Since I had Grayson, since the last time we did this," I clarified, my cheeks burning as I brought my flaws to his attention. "I look different. Like, I have stretch marks and my boobs aren't as perky as they used to be."

Even in the dark shadows of the room, I could see Chris' jaw clench as it did when he was annoyed and trying to bite his tongue. Panic flooded through me as I wished I'd kept my mouth shut, but his next words astounded me.

"Get outta here," he huffed. "You think I care about that?"

I dropped my gaze to the tattoos on his chest as I regretted ever opening my mouth.

"I don't know," I admitted. "Lots of men probably would."

Chris moved back, slowly sliding his body down, away from mine and I wanted to scream, I wanted to stop him and hold him against me as long as I could, but I was powerless to do anything, but watch. My heart sank, thinking he was going to roll off of me any minute now, but then he stopped. His face was level with my lower stomach and turned his eyes back towards my face.

"This body," he started, placing a kiss on my stomach. "This stomach, these stretch marks." He kissed the faint lines that were now barely visible on my skin despite how vibrant they were in my mind. Then he continued up, lifting my shirt as he went until it was resting above my breasts, my nipples hard from the chill in the air and the anticipation I was feeling. "These boobs." He kissed and nipped at the delicate skin, tracing all the way along until he captured a nipple in his mouth, teasing it briefly with his tongue. "They changed because you gave me my son, the greatest gift you could have given me. I have nothing, but gratitude for that and you're still the most fuckin' beautiful woman I've ever seen."

He was exaggerating. I knew he was exaggerating. He saw and worked with Hollywood's most elite actresses and models, there was no chance that I was even close to the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen. But he managed, again, to push all doubts from my mind as his lips set to work, this time focusing on my left nipple while he shifted his weight and freed a hand to stroke and pinch the right.

They were sensitive, they always had been, and the way that Chris was working them right now was almost too much. My head fell back and my hands dropped to the sheets as I tried to focus on enjoying the sensations and not immediately demanding for Chris to move lower, to give me more, to touch me where I wanted to be touched with increasing need. He was always paying attention though and before I even needed to voice my request, he let his mouth slip from my nipple and trail back down my stomach.

He nipped at the skin just above my pyjama pants before hooking his fingers in the waistband and pulling them down. I tugged my shirt over my head at the same time before laying back against the pillow, completely naked underneath him.

"Beautiful."

He'd muttered the word, almost more to himself than to me, but the sincerity in his voice flooded a new kind of warmth through my body. I tried to push it down, focusing on what we were doing, what this was and all it could be. Because yes, I loved Chris, but this wasn't that. This wasn't making love, this was a simple release of sexual tension. I didn't need my feelings getting in the way and making this complicated or I was going to get myself hurt.

I'd been so lost in my head that I hadn't noticed how my legs had fallen apart for Chris to settle between them or how he'd spread me with his fingers, opening me up for him to enjoy. It wasn't until I felt a slow, gentle lick right over my clit that I snapped back into the moment. With a gasp, my hips pressed up to meet his mouth, trying frantically to keep the friction now that it was finally there.

"Easy," Chris warned me, chuckling as he pulled back slightly, earning a whine from me. "We'll get you there, don't worry."

A feeling of desperation was building up inside of me and as he blew gently on the very sensitive parts of me that were in front of him, I was about ready to start begging.

"Please," I whimpered, moving my hand to his hair in case he got any bright ideas about pulling back any further, but I was relieved when he let out a groan and finally gave up on his teasing.

Suddenly I was aware of nothing, but Chris' mouth on me. My back arched as he licked up from the bottom of my core to the top, swirling his tongue around, exploring every little nook and cranny before settling his focus back on my clit. It was like he'd studied me, like he'd committed our previous brief encounter to memory and remembered exactly what I responded to as he licked and sucked with just the right amount of pressure and speed to have me panting as my grip tightened in his hair.

It had only been moments, but I could already feel the pressure building inside me, bubbling closer towards the surface. Chris, as if sensing this, eased off just slightly to slide his tongue a bit lower, pressing it against my entrance, dipping just barely inside, before replacing it with one of his fingers. I felt myself clench at the sensation, my body desperate for relief, desperate for something more inside me and Chris obliged, adding a second finger almost immediately.

"So wet, baby," he hummed, placing a kiss on the inside of my upper thigh.

I was too wrapped up in my own pleasure to formulate any kind of response, but Chris didn't bother waiting for one anyway before putting his lips back on my clit. The combination of his fingers and his mouth had me seeing stars and another whimpered plea slipped from my lips as he flicked his tongue against me. He was focused and determined, groaning against me after a particularly sharp tug on his hair when he angled his fingers inside me to find that one particular spot that made me see stars.

He stroked it once. Then twice. And on the third that coil that had been tightening inside me snapped. I covered my mouth with my free hand just in time to bite down and muffle the scream that Chris pulled from me as my hips thrust up towards him and I spasmed around his fingers as I fell over the edge.

Chris coaxed me through it, easing his attentions as I came down from the high I was feeling. He slid his fingers out of me, looking up to meet my eyes before licking them clean. I groaned, feeling myself twitch with arousal at the sight despite my heart still racing from the orgasm I had just had. He flashed me a smirk before crawling up my body and pressing his lips against mine again.

I sighed happily into the kiss, letting my hands slide down his back, just teasing the top of his pants as I reluctantly separated our mouths.

"Take these off."

My tone left little room for argument and Chris looked down at me with a smirk.

"Yes, ma'am."

He lifted his body off of mine just long enough for me to shiver from the loss of the warmth he was providing, but he quickly returned once his pants were discarded. He stayed slightly lower when he returned, turning his attention back to my chest, taking my left nipple in his mouth this time and using his hand to tease the other. My eyes fluttered shut at the sensation, but I fought the urge to simply lie back and let him do what he wanted with me. I wanted more, I needed more and I didn't want to wait any longer.

"Chris," I whined. "Please, fuck me."

Looking down, I could see his eyes widen in surprise at my blunt demand. He let his mouth slip off my nipple before giving it one last little nip, just hard enough to make me gasp from the slight twinge of pain.

"As you wish."

He reached down between us, taking a moment to slip his two fingers back inside me. He spread them out, gently stretching me and I was grateful. From my memory, Chris was thick and it had been approximately three years and five months since I last had sex (not that I was counting).

Once Chris was satisfied that I was adequately prepared, he pulled his fingers back and guided the tip of his cock towards my entrance. I tried to relax as he slowly stretched me open, but even as my mind revelled in the bliss I was feeling, a thought hit me that made my eyes widen and body stiffen.

"Chris!" I gasped out, gripping his shoulders to push him away slightly. "Condom!"

His head dropped down and he grunted as if he was using the last of his restraint to pull out of me.

"Shit," he cursed. "How could we forget that again?"

"I guess we don't learn from our mistakes," I smiled, despite the pang in my heart as the voice in my head chimed in again to say 'clearly not or you wouldn't be about to fuck him and break your own heart again'. "Do you have one?"

Chris nodded, rolling off me for just long enough to reach over to the bedside table. He pulled one out of the drawer, ripped it open and slid it on with impressive speed before crawling back over me.

"Now," he smirked. "Where were we?"

He looked down as he guided himself inside me again. The initial stretch wasn't as intense the second time around, but it grew as he pushed deeper and my breath hitched once he was fully inside. Chris stilled, sensing my discomfort as he dropped his head to kiss along my jaw until his lips rested just below my ear.

"You good?"

"Mhmm," I nodded, breathing out and shifting my hips as I started to adjust. We stayed like that, connected but still, for a few moments until I felt the tension ease a bit. "You can move."

"You sure?" Chris looked at me with concern on his face, but I nodded.

That was all the reassurance he needed as he began slowly moving his hips. He pulled his lips back from where they rested near my ear and pressed them against mine.

He kissed me deeply, passionately, as he created a steady rhythm, sliding in and out with his hips pressing hard against mine with each thrust. His biceps bulged and strained to support his weight through the movement and he eventually let his mouth fall away from mine as he could no longer hold back a groan. That noise, and the grunts that followed, made me twitch around him as if my body was doing everything it could to keep him inside me, to keep the pleasure that it had been craving for so long.

I could feel him dragging against every inch inside me, brushing against every nerve and stretching me just enough to keep me constantly impressed by how big he was. It was somehow too much, but not enough all at the same time and I hitched my leg higher up on his waist to help him get closer, deeper, if at all possible.

"Good girl..."

Chris' words hummed encouragingly against my collarbone where he placed another soft kiss before pulling back. He placed his hand on the back of my knee and lifted it even higher, opening me up for him even more.

My head dropped back against the pillow on the next stroke as his cock slid against that delicious spot inside me where his fingers had been only minutes before. He was watching, looking down between us to see me wrapped around him, see me taking him all the way every time he pushed in. I could hear him mumbling praises, compliments about how well I was doing, but I was too far gone, too wrapped up in the pleasure emanating from between my legs to do anything, but moan in response.

He slowed for a moment, leaning down, my leg catching on his shoulder and pressing it even higher as he reminded me to be quiet. He nipped my ear lobe, pulling a whimper from my lips before moving back and picking his pace up again. I knew he was right, but it was hard, next to impossible even, to hold back the noises that were bubbling in my throat.

I bit my lip and dug my nails into his skin as I attempted to control my volume and silently cursed Chris when he shifted his weight just enough to put the pressure of each thrust back on just the right spot. He moved his thumb down to brush over my clit, but it barely took a few strokes for me to fly over the edge.

It felt like my whole world exploded as I clenched around him, a low moan slipping past the lip between my teeth. The tingle ripped through every part of my body, every muscle quivering with pleasure, as Chris picked up the pace even more, with one final burst of speed until he stilled, letting out a deep, rumbling groan of his own before pumping in and out a few final times.

Once he'd stopped his movements completely, he let my leg lower to the bed, collapsing against my chest as he fought to catch his breath. I drifted my hand up to stroke the damp hairs on the back of his neck and soaked in the blissful feeling, a feeling I'd dreamt about since the last time I had the pleasure of enjoying it.

We stayed like that for a few moments until Chris reluctantly pulled back, letting out a soft groan as he slid out of me.

"I'll be right back."

I admired Chris' ability to walk already as all I had the strength to do was nod and shift back to my side of the bed. When Chris reappeared a few minutes later after disposing of the condom in the bathroom, I could barely keep my eyes open. He climbed back under the blankets and shifted over towards me until he could pull me right against his chest with our legs intertwined.

"That was nice," I sighed happily, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms as I nuzzled my nose into his toned pecs.

They shook as he chuckled and a giggle slipped from my lips as well.

"It was," he agreed, kissing the top of my head the same way he had at the start of this little rendezvous.

There was a heaviness in the air, the underlying unspoken words and the conversation that needed to be had hung between us, but I couldn't bring myself to ruin the moment. I'd spent so much time thinking about this, what it would be like to be in his arms again, I couldn't bare to say anything that might make him pull away and snap out of the moment of insanity we'd slipped into.

So, I didn't and neither did he. With one final, gentle kiss goodnight, we stayed tightly in our embrace until we drifted off into a contented sleep.

-

Part Three

#chris evans fanfiction #chris evans fic #chris evans x ofc #chris evans smut #once bitten twice shy

[edie-baby]

Les Fleurs du Mal Chapter 1| Pierre Gasly

Summary: Sava Dvorakova had big dreams for Formula One. An opportunity of a lifetime comes around, so she takes it and runs. She proved just about everyone wrong, and is awarded a very controversial seat on the F1 grid. There’s smiles and grins, hugs and kisses, love and laughter. There’s tears and sobs, fights and break ups. There’s evil where you least expect it, hidden in the garden of eden. The Flowers of Evil.

Warnings: a lot of swearing, shitty parents (they’re a recurring theme), sexism, i ignored a lot of actual f1 rules because i couldn’t be bothered writing it into the story tbh, yuki is fcking adorable, a lot of smut eventually, like a lot.

There were hundreds, thousands, maybe even a million girls who have dreamed of making it into Formula One. It is the pinnacle of motorsport, the highest calibre and the most competitive of its many engine-based counterparts. Many women over the years have tried to make their way into the sport, but as each season becomes more competitive, it seems as though the women of motorsport keep slipping through the cracks. Perhaps it’s a timing thing - they weren’t in the right place at the right time - or perhaps it’s a sexism thing, or maybe the female drivers just simply are not at the same level that a lot of the men are at.

Sava Dvorakova feared being one of those women. One that would try their hardest, but were still unable to make their mark on a sport they had very clear passion for. The seventeen year old had been karting since her fifth birthday, progressing through the levels the Czech Republic had to offer before she moved onto European championships. Nearly every weekend of the year, Sava was in her kart, racing against boys three years her senior and thrashing them each time. However, she didn’t get the opportunity to progress into single-seaters for many years.

It was September 2020, just like any other race weekend when it happened, Sava piled into her kart as the marshalling for her heat was called. Her uncle patted the top of her helmet for good luck, a tradition the two had kept for about twelve years at this point, and she made it out onto her starting place - pole position as usual. Sava pulled clean moves the entire race, defended her position without being reckless or desperate, and had perfect pace. As she pulled back into the pits under her team’s marquee, she spotted her uncle speaking with an older man in a button up and slacks, something quite odd for a normal karting weekend. Sava hopped out, practically ripping her helmet and balaclava off as her footsteps increased in pace to get to her uncle. He scooped her up into a hug, spinning the girl a few times and congratulating her on another victory for the season.

“Bunny, this is Doctor Helmut Marko, he’s the director of Red Bull Racing. He’d like to speak with you about a driving opportunity.�� Sebastian, her uncle, stated clearly, his excitement spilling into his eyes as he stared at his seventeen year old niece. Her dyed-pink hair sat matted to her forehead, the majority of it spun into Dutch braids down her back that would be tucked into the back of her race suit before the next race, her cheeks were flushed red, and her bottom lip was cracked in places from how much the Czech nibbled on it on and off track. Sebastian almost laughed at the situation she had ended up in.

“Dr Marko, it’s lovely to meet you. I have an hour until my next heat, so if you would like to speak urgently, there is a small cafe about a hundred metres from the track. If you’d like less of a time constraint, I will be completely free after 4pm today.” Sava told the man in front of her, Czech accent so thick the Austrian could barely understand her.

“It should only take about 10 minutes, so if you’d like, I can buy you and your uncle a coffee at the cafe while we speak.” Dr Marko offered. Sava nodded calmly, her uncle much more vocal about his excitement. Sava excused herself to change into less sweaty clothes, returning in a halter-neck singlet and a pair of ripped skinny jeans. Her trusty combat boots stepped over all of the tools, debris, and shit that was scattered around the pits as she made it back to the two men.

“So, Sava, what is your goal in karting?” Dr Marko began almost immediately after the trio had sat down in the cafe.

“To make it into formula one and win multiple world championships.” Sava responded confidently, barely a second between the question and her reply as it was something she had thought about for a very long time.

“So why aren’t you already driving in single seaters?” Dr Marko questioned further, and from the corner of her eye, Sava could see her uncle tense up.

“Because no one’s willing to give me a chance in the big leagues because they know I’ll do a lot better than half the boys on the grid.” The seventeen year old replied. Helmut seemed impressed with the rapid fire, confidence laden responses he was receiving.

“Well, I’m willing to. Jehan Daruvala, a Red Bull junior currently driving for Carlin in formula two is unable to attend the last three races of the season because of health issues. I want you to take his seat for those races, and if you’re as good in a single seater as you are in that kart, I’ll make sure you have a seat for next year.” Helmut laid out, and Sebastian audibly choked. Sava smirked at her uncle’s reaction, and stared into the eyes of the man offering her a fast track to her dreams.

“I’d love to. When and where is the next race?” Sava chuckled, her uncle’s recovery from his choking fit was slow, and Helmut looked on in amusement. He had seen many similar reactions from the drivers he was propositioning, but it seemed as though this duo had reversed the normal roles.

“The weekend begins on Thursday in Italy. You’ll be racing in Mugello.” Helmut told the pair dryly. Sebastian began coughing once again, Sava simply rubbing his back soothingly while she nodded.

“I’ll need to make arrangements with my school, but I presume you’ll make travel and accommodation arrangements from Prague to Mugello?” Sava continued her calm conversation, though she could feel her natural bubbliness and excitement ready to burst through.

“Yes. There will be a Carlin race suit and boots in Mugello when you arrive, as well as a helmet and teamwear. You’ll have a personal assistant for the time you’re in Jehan’s seat, to keep up with the media and to navigate the paddock. I’ll have all of the relevant information forwarded to you tonight, and there will be a contract for you to sign upon your arrival in Italy.”

“Then I’ll see you there, sir. I best be on my way, I’ll need time to change back into my race suit before my heat is called in about half an hour. It was lovely to meet you, and I look forward to meeting and exceeding your expectations.” Sava concluded, standing up to give her new boss a handshake before she turned on her heels and practically sprinted out of the cafe. She speed walked back to the track and into the changing rooms before letting out the ear splitting squeal she had been holding in since she won her race forty five minutes ago.

It was easy enough to sort out her absence with her school, as there were no assessments due and Sava was already miles ahead of the rest of her peers, so her teachers had no qualms with letting their champion out to represent the country.

The issue however, was with her parents. Her father, a man she had been emancipated from for over a year, decided he would give her grief for throwing away her education to take someone’s spot for a few weeks before they would inevitably drop her once they realised how bad she was. Her mother wasn’t much better. As her legal guardian, she technically did have the right to stop her daughter from going into the F2 seat, but after a gruelling discussion and many threats from Sava to emancipate from her mother as well, she conceded.

So, on a very sunny, very early Thursday morning in September, Sava hopped onto a plane with an overnight bag to begin catching her dreams. Unfortunately, Sebastian had work during the week, but would be flying out to Italy on Friday night to watch his niece’s races on Saturday and Sunday. But, Sava arrived in Italy as bubbly and excitable as ever. Her pink hair was split into her iconic high pigtails, a white crop top, and pastel pink pleated skirt and trusted combat boots covered her form, black duffel bag thrown over her shoulder with some clothes for the weekend, and all of her travel documents. The PA standing with her name printed on a sign was very confused when a very small, very pink teenage girl bumbled over to her and said ‘Hi, I’m Sava. But everyone calls me Bunny’.

“I’m sorry, I expected someone a little more gritty.” The twenty-something woman spoke, her blonde hair in a high ponytail with a Carlin shirt and dark wash jeans. Sava guessed the PA expected someone who looked more like herself.

“It’s okay, I get that a lot. Most people don’t recognise me out of my race suit, so I definitely don’t expect someone who’s never seen me to anticipate my looks. What’s your name?” Sava’s Czech accent, combined with her hyperactivity meant she talked extremely fast, and often it was all nonsense, and she simply spoke for the sake of speaking. The PA took a few seconds to process the words Sava had spoken before finally replying with a simple ‘Amelia’. The two made it to the car that was waiting and travelled to the track in silence, Sava taking in the sights, and Amelia tapping away at her phone. When they got out, Amelia handed Sava a paddock pass, explaining the importance of it and demonstrating how to use it at the gates. They walked through to the Carlin garage, one half working away excitedly, while the other side seemed rather dead.

“Everyone, can I have your attention please? This is Sava Dvorakova, she’s our reserve driver for the rest of the season. Make her comfortable, and make sure she feels welcome!” Amelia yelled, very quickly causing silence to spread over the entire garage.

“Hi! I’m Sava, but most people call me Bunny, so feel free to do either! Or if you’d like, Dvorakova works just as well, but it’s a bit of a mouthful so I understand if you mispronounce it. I’ll also probably respond to ‘hey you’ so anything works. I’m really looking forward to working with you all and giving you some good results this weekend!” Sava giggled at the end, her fists clenched in front of her chest as she gave a small cheer with her hands and the entire garage remained silent for a few moments before breaking out into whispers, their eyes trailing over the teenager’s body. The anxiety in Sava’s belly bubbled, and she began playing with her hands until she was approached by a boy who was a little taller than her with a friendly smile on his face.

“Hi, I’m Yuki. I drive the other Carlin. It’s nice to meet you Bunny.” Yuki introduced with a smile and fist bump. He was unbelievably pleased to meet a driver who was smaller than him, though he supposed that her being a girl wouldn’t ease all of the teasing he got from other drivers on the grid. The two chatted about their background in racing, and Yuki gave Sava a few pointers on handling the car she was about to drive for the first time ever.

“Sava, I have all of your race gear to try on, and later on you’ll need to do a seat fitting as the mechanics are just going to modify one of Yuki’s seats since you two are similar height.” Amelia stated, breaking up the conversation between the two youngsters. Sava apologised to her new friend before practically skipping behind Amelia. She received a few weird looks from others in the paddock, including a few F1 drivers she recognised from TV and her Instagram feed. She wasn’t sure why they were in this paddock, but supposed a few of the younger guys had only recently come out of F2.

When she got into a Carlin motorhome, race overalls and her flame-retardant undersuit were thrust into her hands by Amelia, and then pointed toward a tiny bathroom within the motorhome while the PA continued scrolling through emails, updating social media, and answering calls. Sava pulled the suits on excitedly, and though it was a bit tight in the hips, thighs and chest, she thought it looked pretty damn good.

“So, I think this was definitely made for a guy with less boobs and smaller hips, but the fit is still really good.” Sava joked to Amelia when she stepped out, only to see Helmut Marko standing alongside her new assistant. She went red instantly, her shoulders tensing and sliding up toward her head.

“Yes, well, we can certainly fix that before the next race, but right now, I believe you’re needed for fittings in the garage, so throw on your helmet and get down there.” Helmut ordered. Sava quickly snatched up her balaclava and helmet, threading the two onto her arm as she began undoing the pigtails to braid them on her way back to the Carlin garage while Amelia and Helmut stayed behind to talk.

If Sava thought she was getting weird looks on her way to the motorhome, she was getting even weirder ones on the way back from it. From what she could tell, it seemed more like mechanics, engineers and other personnel from other teams and she couldn’t see any drivers she recognised before she slipped into the Carlin garage, one braid half finished, and her helmet banging against her head every time she moved her arm. Yuki laughed at her struggles, ambling over to thread the helmet and balaclava off her arm while she held the half finished braid precariously. Sava thanked him with a quick smile and continued braiding, her tongue occasionally poking out the side of her mouth in concentration. One she was finished, and the long braids were tucked into the back of her suit, she pulled on the balaclava and helmet in record speed, and then was ushered into the F2 car to begin the tedious process of trying and changing one of Yuki’s seats to suit her height and posture. 

After about an hour of fiddling, she was allowed to take the helmet off, and was beginning to doze off in the cockpit while a few of the employees debated different ways of measuring and fixing the seat nearby. Amelia came into the garage to find the new driver fully asleep in her car with everyone still talking around her. She took a photo and uploaded it to Carlin’s Instagram story, tagging the driver and writing a quick word about the reserve driver they hadn’t officially announced yet. She giggled slightly, and when two of the mechanics came back over to lift the seat out of the car, they accidentally lifted the driver out with it. Amelia took more photos of the seventeen year old comfortably in her race suit, curled in her seat while two mechanics held the entire ensemble up above the car.

Suffice to say, Carlin’s Instragram was flooded with adoring new fans, angered stans, and a few cheeky formula one drivers on private accounts. 

#pierre gasly #Pierre Gasly fanfic #Pierre Gasly imagine #Pierre Gasly x reader #formula one #formula 1 #f1 #f1 fanfic #Daniel Ricciardo is a lad #there's some lando flirting #I couldn't help myself #gasly #pg10 #call me eden

[nightwishesworld]

A Better Way

Because I am unhappy with our beloved wife’s death I decided to write my own.

That being said...SPOILERS!!!!!!!! I wrote this based on and referenced canon events in the game. If you wanna skip this and wait for the game’s official release in a few days I completely understand.

Alcina’s form trembles atop the pile of rubble she created during their fall. Somehow that lowlife Ethan survived the fall as well. Fuck, what does it take to kill that man? Even in her monstrous form, she failed to stop a flimsy little mortal man. Is he really that powerful? Or is she simply the weak little rat Mother Miranda always said she was? The answer is obvious now.

Alcina knows this is it for her. There is no winning or even recovering from this. She’s lost way too much blood and is in no state to replenish herself. She hears him stumble to his feet somewhere beside her and grab his gun. It doesn’t bother her anymore. Even now as she turns to stare down the barrel of a shotgun she knows she deserves what’s to come. She failed in her task.

Everyone that depends on her is now in grave danger and it’s all her fault. Because she wasn’t good enough to protect her family from a single human man.

Her family....

Images of her beautiful daughters' lifeless piles of ash lying abandoned on the floor like yesterday’s garbage hurt her more than any weapons could hope to. What kind of mother let her daughters, her own flesh and blood, get slaughtered because she was too incompetent to take care of a little pest? A failure of a mother. Their blood is on her hands, not Ethan’s.

Mother Miranda will have to make the call to Heisenberg to let him know why Ethan is on his way to the factory. And about them. After everything that this woman has done for her and her family and this is how Alcina repays her? How pathetic of her. And her little brother as well. She’s failed everyone she cared about on this god-forsaken earth.

Alcina sighs as Ethan cocks his gun and inches closer and closer to her. After letting out a long exhale she opens her eyes and stared down at him. He’s in shit-shape but he’ll survive. Suddenly that doesn’t sound so bad. If he can finish the job, at least.

“Do it,” she whispers, and her voice cracks. Alcina will not cry in front of this vile creature; she refuses. “I am nothing without the love of my daughters. I’d rather die than live a day without their presence.”

She could have sworn she saw a hint of remorse flash across his bloodied features before he grounded himself once more. He probably didn’t even believe her. Why would he? All he sees is a hideous beast that needs to slain. Not a broken-hearted mother mourning the loss of her darling children. No one has ever seen them for who they really are. Pity.

Her head hangs and she catches a glimpse of his shadow, his arms raising.

“I deserve this,” Alcina thinks to herself.

BANG!

Karl Heisenberg was sitting in his office, legs stretched atop his desk glazing over files. Pretending to work so no one would bother him. He was so lost in his own little fantasy land that the phone ringing next to him nearly started him out of his chair.

He let out a dramatic groan, knowing full well it was Alcina calling to continue their petty argument from earlier. A chuckle escaped his mouth remembering how he told her to drop dead before hanging up.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and begrudgingly brought the phone to his ear.

“Didn’t I tell you earlier to-“

“Heisenberg!” Mother Miranda’s voice spoke. The man nearly choked on air when he heard her voice.

“Miranda! Apologies, I thought it was Alcina calling me.”

Mother Miranda paused, but only for a moment. Her tone was as it always was; calm with a hint of disappointment. “That is what I am calling about, actually. Alcina failed to keep Mr. Winters under control and he escaped. I can only assume he is making his way over to you now.”

“Alcina and the girls, are they-“

“No longer assets we need to be concerned about. The Ceremony will continue on schedule with or without them, is that understood?”

He was completely floored. His beloved, pain in the ass, older sister is dead. And what of his adorable little gremlin nieces? They’re gone too? How can Miranda possibly expect him to just-“

“Is that understood, Heisenberg?”

He cleared his throat and nodded as if she could see him. “Of course, Miranda. The preparation will continue as-“

She hung up.

Heisenberg put the phone down and buried his head in his hands. He didn’t feel anything. Only numbness. The longer he sat there thinking about them the harder to became to think about the stupid ceremony. Or that human parasite on its way to him.

His anger got the best of him and he slammed his fists down on the desk. “To hell with Mother Miranda.”

He called one of his lackeys in and filled them in on the basics of the situation, warning him about Ethan mostly. Heisenberg was to depart for Castle Dimitrescu as soon as possible. Let the lycans have fun with their new incoming chew toy until his return.

The ride up to the castle was ghostly. He expected to hear the girls’ laughter as he entered the main doors as they always do when he visits. They were always happy to see their dear Uncle Heisenberg.

Cassandra’s ash pile was the first to be found. Simply because it was out in the open by the entrance leading down to the basement. It was obviously her because the smell of her lilac perfume was still infused in her ashes. He kneeled beside it and stroked it gently between his fingers, whispering apologies and words of comfort. Both for him and Cassandra. Then he took an old pendant necklace from his pocket and ever so gently, scooped some of her ashes into it.

“There you are, Cass. Safe and sound with me.”

On a hunch he decided to look around the basement before searching the rest of the castle for Bela and Daniela. He already knew where Alcina was resting. Bela was indeed laid in one of the extraction rooms of the basement. She collapsed behind a pillar as if she were trying to hide or shield herself. Heisenberg did the same thing and scooped up her ashes in his necklace, this time kissing the pads of his fingers and laying them on the ash pile.

Daniela was next. She was in the library, literally on the other side of the door. Heisenberg cursed himself for unintentionally spreading her ashes as he opened the door and nearly stepping on the poor girl. He stayed with her longer because of this, whispering a thousand apologies to her. The way she was laid down made Heisenberg think Daniela tried to escape and came really close to doing so.

A few tears streamed down his cheeks as she gathered her ashes in his pendant. That man will pay for what he’s done. For taking such innocent souls from the world that had so much more in store for them.

His beloved sister was last. She wasn’t where he thought she would be, which he found odd, but taking a closer look around it all made sense. The damn burst behind his eyes and he openly cried for the first time in decades.

“Fuck,” he sobbed, soothing his sister’s large heap of ashes. “I didn’t mean literally, Alcina.”

He grabbed a fist full of ash and clutched it to his chest. “I’m so sorry, sister. I should have helped you trapped that rat when he escaped me the first time. But I won’t let that happen again.”

Just like with the girls, he scooped up some of her ashes in the pendant. But this time instead of putting it back around his neck he gave it a few delicate shakes, mixing the four of them together as one.

“There. Now you’ll always be together; in this eternity and the next.”

He stayed there next to her for the rest of the night. They talked for hours (though it was a one-sided conversation) and watched the stars flicker into existence as the sunset. When there were enough of them out he pointed out the various constellations to her. The entire night went on like this; acting as if nothing had changed since they were children.

The sun was just starting to rise over the grassy green hills. Radiant shades of pink and gold colored the sky like never before. It was almost like looking at heaven itself. Early birds sang their song of the morning as they flew swiftly across the sky to wake the rest of the woodland creatures and the residents of the village.

Heisenberg exhaled a shaky breath. “I better be off, Sissy. Miranda will have my head if I don’t deal with that rat before the ceremony. But don’t you worry, I’ll take care of all four of you once this shitstorm has passed. You’ll be given proper burials and everyone will have a chance to say goodbye.”

He could feel the tears starting to build up again. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to protect you or the girls. You’re a royal pain in my ass, but you’re still my big sister and I love you.”

The ride back to the factory was comforting. There was still a heavy weight on his shoulders, but he never expected it to go away. It will only go away after exacting his revenge. When he finds that man, oh boy is he in for a treat. The lycans should have done some damage to him already or at least exhausted him. Ethan is weak now. It’s time to strike back.

No one harms Karl Heisenberg’s family and gets away with it.

#Lady Dimitrescu #lady Alcina #tall vampire lady #alcina dimitrescu #resident evil village #resident evil 8

[the-hidden-writer]

And Into The Fire

Chapter 2: Mother, I Don’t Feel So Good

Summary:

Months after the Mitchells saved the world, Linda gets a phone call asking if she’s seen two defective Pal MAX bots. Powerful people are after Eric and Deborabot 5000, and it’s up to the Mitchells to protect them.

Check reblogs for AO3 link!

Mother, I Don’t Feel So Good

A week had passed since the ominous phone call and Linda was only just starting to think all her worry was for nothing. Nobody had broken down their front door to take her bots away and there had been no more word from Bowman, so she could assume that they had taken her words at face value. It was a huge relief to say the least.

She woke up that morning at 7am as normal. It was Saturday, so Rick and Aaron would both sleep in for a few more hours while she would have the house almost all to herself.

She smiled at the sound of birds in the garden. Today felt like it was going to be a good day.

The second she went downstairs however, something felt very wrong.

Linda was always the first person up. She’d go to the bathroom and then head to the kitchen to listen to the radio for a bit. On the way, she’d pass the bots watching TV in the living room. Every morning, without fail, they’d say “Good morning, Mother!” to her in their cheerful voices. It was extremely adorable, part of her routine, and something she secretly looked forward to every time she woke up.

The utter silence downstairs today was disturbing.

There weren't even the quiet sounds from whatever show the bots happened to be watching that she’d grown to be familiar with. She poked her head into the living room and could immediately see that the TV was turned off.

The living room was also empty.

“Boys?”

No answer.

A sudden wave of panic washing over her, Linda raced back up the stairs. The bots had never not followed their routine, so something must be wrong. She could feel that something was wrong. It was her motherly instincts taking over.

In her panicked state, she slammed open the door to the guest room (the bots lived there now- they couldn’t be trusted with Katie’s room) and felt immediate relief when she saw one of the bots sitting with his back to her on the side of the bed.

So they hadn’t been taken in the middle of the night. That was a good start.

But then her eyes fell onto the figure actually lying in the bed, and the relief disappeared again.

She was almost scared to ask. “Boys..?”

The robot on the bed turned his head to reveal it was Deborahbot. He lifted his index finger (as he often did when he was about to speak) but was interrupted by a sudden burst of glitching on his screen, causing his head to tilt dangerously quickly to one side and for a loud buzzing sound that came and left in a matter of seconds.

Now Linda knew that the bots were defective and were therefore prone to the occasional glitch, though usually their glitches were accompanied by sparks and were caused by little things that confused them and never actually affected their life/routine. This sudden glitch, however, was spark-less and looked scarily like the time when they were controlled by Pal.

Linda’s gut feeling only worsened.

Once he’d seemingly recovered from the glitch, Deborahbot straightened his head and stood up to greet her.

“...Good morning… Mother…”

And if Linda had felt bad before, nothing could compare with the chill that crept up her spine at the words. Not only did Deborahbot sound slightly distorted (as if he was struggling to get the words out) but the phrase was spoken by him alone. Normally, the brothers would always say it in-sync with one another in their slightly-creepy-but-well-meaning way.

She forced herself to speak calmly. “Deborahbot… where’s Eric?”

She almost wished that he hadn’t stepped aside so that she could spend a moment longer without seeing the state of her boy on the bed.

Eric’s face was barely visible with the amount of lights and lines of code flashing on and off. Under all that, his screen was in a constant state of television static, and as Linda hesitantly moved closer she could even hear the buzzing sound that accompanied it.

To top it all off, he was unmoving and a blanket had been shoddily thrown on top of him with his feet sticking out at the bottom.

Following her gaze, Deborahbot spoke up.

“Blankets bring humans comfort-” he glitched and recovered in an instant- “I thought it might bring him some comfort as well.”

Linda could barely form words.

“Wh-What’s going on?!”

Deborahbot glitched again before speaking. “An outside source is attempting to penetrate our systems and rewrite our code. We are... trying to stop that.”

It pained her to hear his voice so quiet and strained.

It had never really crossed her mind in the months that they’d lived with them that the bots- her boys- could be hacked. Their technology was so advanced and the fact that they were so sentient meant that she’d just assumed that it wasn’t possible. Maybe if she’d stopped to think, she might have been able to see this coming and do something to stop it.

“Is Eric okay?” She asked, unable to tear her eyes away from the immobile android. “Why isn’t he-”

“I think that…” Deborahbot began, and Linda noticed how his voice sounded full of sorrow (or at least as much sorrow as his monotonous voice could muster). “I think that I am... more defective than my brother.” He paused and Linda sucked in a breath at the vulnerable admission. “Since our defects are what protects us from Pal Labs’ network, it is easier for them to access him. My brother is... working very hard to fight them off.”

“Okay,” Said Linda quietly, trying to calm herself down more than anything. She needed Rick and Katie’s help on this one. She couldn’t deal with this alone. “Okay, um... “

A question sprung into mind that she dreaded to know the answer to. Gently, she placed her hands on Deborahbot’s shoulders in what she hoped was a comforting gesture.

“Does it hurt?”

“Only if we resist the new coding.” Was his reply, but it wasn’t the conformation Linda was looking for.

“And… are you? Are you both resisting it?” Deborahbot glitched yet again as she spoke.

“Yes.” He answered, ever the more direct of the two.

Not for the first time, Linda was glad that the bots didn’t look like humans. She didn’t think she would be able to handle seeing pain all over their innocent faces.

She guided Deborahbot back to the bed and sat him down. With one last stroke of his shoulders (since you can't squeeze metal) she finally released him and moved towards the door. She didn’t dare touch Eric in fear of making his situation any worse.

“I’m gonna go get Rick.” She told him. She had no idea if Eric could even hear anything right now. “Is there anything I can do in the meantime?”

“No.” Deborahbot replied bluntly. “Thank you for asking though, Mother.”

“Alright then. Stay strong boys, I’ll be back soon.”

Linda didn’t want to leave the room. She was new to this- heck, it had been months and she still wasn’t completely used to her new children being robots- but seeing the bots like that reminded her of the time that Katie and Aaron got chickenpox.

Aaron had caught it from school and Katie caught it off Aaron. While Aaron had fought it off pretty quickly, Katie was much older and it ended up being so serious that she needed to go to hospital. She was in bed with Linda at her bedside for a few days.

Just as Deborahbot was with Eric now. The only difference was that Deborahbot was affected too, and there were no doctors or nurses to help them get better.

Her boys were dangerously sick. Deborahbot had the equivalent of Aaron’s condition while Eric was practically comatose.

With that comparison in mind, Linda felt determination lock itself in her soul. She was going to help her boys get better, no matter what. That was her responsibility as their mother and she was damn well gonna fulfil it.

Comments make my day :)

#the mitchells vs the machines #tmvtm #fic #tmvtm eric #eric tmvtm #deborahbot 5000 #eric and deborahbot5000 #eric and deborahbot #linda mitchell #and into the fire

[angst-fairygodmother]

Girl Talk (The Song of Sway Lake Fic)

A/N: The moment has finally arrived! The first official collab/crossover between myself and @miss-kittys-magical-library​! I’m really excited for how this came out, and how much fun we had writing it together. 😊 Word Count: 3127 Rating: T - mild language, brief mention of blood, discussion of violence

~The Papermill bookstore, Sway Lake~

Selina burst through the door of the bookstore.  She almost doesn't wait for Jess to say hello or ask questions.  Selina is overcome with adrenaline, the exhilaration of what she did. A giant smile spread across her lips.  There's almost a dreamy look in her eyes.  

She's covered in blood: her hands, her jeans, the bottom of her shirt.  Selina held her hands like a surgeon so she didn't touch anything.  

Jess’s mouth hung open while she pointed nervously towards the upstairs.  Her friend knew where to find what she needed.

Selina comes out of the hot shower knowing Jess will be in the room waiting.  She found clean clothes but stopped to study herself in the mirror.  Somehow she felt like her body had changed somehow.  

Selina caught a picture of her and Jess and held it up.  How far they've come from the girls in the photo on her best friend’s dresser.

She glimpsed Jess in the mirror, a strange smirk on her face.  Selina knew something was up.  She handed the picture to her friend and spoke,

“Can you believe this was us?”

------

There had been a time in life where Selina and Jess had told each other everything, no matter what. And yet somehow this summer, one of the most eventful in recent history, Jess hadn’t told her best friend anything. Anyone who had spent any time on the lake knew about tensions between the Sways and...basically everyone, but especially Selina’s mother and her relatives. And more than that, it had been kind of nice to have a good secret all to herself for a little while. But she missed her friend, and would have loved her advice on what to do about the boy who was quickly becoming someone important, and a problem for her heart. 

She was just thinking about the other girl, wondering if she should call her after work, maybe suggest a bonfire or late night rowboat race like they used to have, when Selina burst through the door. Jess’s eyes fell to the blood first, and then rose quickly to Selina’s face and the expression that didn’t match the apparent situation at all. 

A thousand questions raced through her mind as she pointed her best friend toward her bathroom (not that Selina didn’t know where it was by now) and made quick work of closing the shop. She didn’t seem hurt, so everything else could wait. While Selina washed herself clean, Jess dug for any clothes left behind the last time she had come for a visit, and failing that, any old shorts and t-shirt. She left them on top of the dresser and poked her head into the bathroom to gather the discarded bloody garments and throw them into the wash. 

Selina was standing in the bedroom, studying herself in the mirror when Jess returned, and for a moment she wondered, again, if her friend was injured. 

“Can you believe this was us, what?”

Selina laughed, “These girls.  We’re just girls here trying to be grown women.  I sort of treated you like I did Sunny.” 

She waited for Jess to maybe bristle or tense up at his name. “I marched on to the beach, saw the first girl my age who had SOMETHING in common with me, and declared you mine.  We aren't little girls anymore.”  

There was a bittersweetness in her voice.  Selina didn't even care that she was naked. 

Jess laughed. She remembered that day, meeting Selina after escaping her siblings in search of a moment of peace and quiet, far from what actually found her instead. But they had got on so quickly she'd forgotten to be angry about it.  

"No, we really aren't," she agreed with a tinge of nostalgic sadness in her own voice.

She leaned back on her hands on the bed, watching her friend study the picture. "I never minded, you know. It was kind of nice to be claimed by somebody. You'll always be my first for that," she bit her lip, hoping the joke didn't come off as uncomfortable given the situation. 

Selina finally dressed and sat beside her friend on the bed.  Her knuckles caressed the other woman’s cheek before she swept the hair from her face. Without a thought, she leaned in and gently pressed her lips to Jess’s, tongue lingered a bit before she broke away.  

“That's from Sunny too.”  Selina laid on her side tucked under Jess’s arm.  “How is it that I was here for a few weeks, and youuuu have been tramping around Sway Lake with some chick?!  Have you gone FULL lesbian?” she dropped her voice low. 

Jess turned onto her side, propping a head on her arm to face Selina. 

"You two are so weird," she rolled her eyes. "I don't think I'll ever get used to that." 

Her stomach flipped at the thought of Sunny, eyes cast to the ceiling as her thoughts wandered. She loved Ollie, but there was something raw about the idea of losing the other boy, even though he wasn't really hers anymore and hadn't been in quite some time. 

She quirked a teasing eyebrow as she returned to the present moment and the woman beside her.

"If I was going to do that, do you think it would be with anyone else than you? Whoever gave you your gossip needs glasses."

Selina’s mouth dropped open, “There's a guy around here with hair that long?!”  

She linked her arm through Jess’s and pulled her in for a hug.  The other woman now wrapped up in her embrace.  Selina let her chin rest on her friend’s head as she stroked her hair.  “You feel happier.  Content.  Like you're just drifting along.  I know you loved Sunny in your own way, but this is different.  It's the,” she ran a hand up and down Jess’s body without touching it, “this.  Papa would call it your aura.” 

Jess grinned. "I am. I'm really, really happy," she answered dreamily. "Ollie's a really sweet guy. But only here for the summer…"

She swallowed down the lingering bitter taste her argument with Ollie the previous morning had left in her mouth, not wanting to burden the conversation with her fears. Especially not when she still had so many questions of her own. 

"But don't think asking about my love life is going to get you out of explaining yourself, missy." She teased.

Selina sat up, “Oliver Sway?!  Jessica!  Come on.  Any other Tom, Dick or asshole at this stupid lake.  Sunny.  Sunny’s RIGHT THERE.  Just grab him by the ankle and bring him back to Earth.  He needs you.”

She took a breath, “That.. harpie will tear you apart because you aren't good breeding.  It's Sway Lake because that's what those upper crust cunts hold over this entire town.  Sway.  Lakes dont belong to one family, they should belong to EVERY person.  Are Sunny and I the only ones NOT under this family’s curse?  First Tom, then Nikolai and now you.”  

Selina’s voice was full of disappointment more than anger.  She looked at her hands.  Her palms, white and clean, were just caked brownish red not even an hour ago.  “It can't be the both of us.”

"Nikolai?!" Jess asked, staring for a moment before doubling over in laughter. "Oh god it all makes sense now."

She struggled to contain her laughter, gasping for air and wiping away the tears in her eyes from it. 

"Fuck Charlotte Sway, I couldn't care less what she thinks," she said, sobering and then sighing. "It's not like I planned on falling in love with Ollie. But I did, and it kinda scares me. I really really don't want to lose him. And he hates her and the whole legacy bullshit as much as anyone. Let it all rot or burn or whatever."

Jess was silent for a moment. It was hard to say Selina was her only or even oldest friend. But they were best friends, for certain, and they knew everything about each other. There were even times when they were younger that Selina and Sunny had talked about soulmates and Jess had wondered if she were hers. Which is why her stomach twisted with guilt as she realized just how unsettled Selina was, and pretending not to be. 

"But enough about me, it doesn't matter. Are you okay?"

Selina took Jess’s hand in hers.  She laced their fingers together and laid down again.  This time she and her friend were side by side.  She was certain no one in any spoken language had invented a word for what the two of them were.  

Selina knew it was why Leon and Johnny always ended phone calls and visits with long hugs and I love yous.  Why Honey and Klaus showered each other with intimacy and affection Honey showed Leon.  Friendships that made people question your sexual intentions.  It was probably something in the Kostas skin, like a pheromone. 

The 23 year old pushed the thought out of her mind that everyone around them was their friend because they didn't have a choice.  Instead she squeezed Jess’s hand.  

“You know Honey, she holds grudges with a tight grip.  There's only two people she hates: Charlotte Sway and Reginald Hargreeves, and he's the one she really wants dead.  Charlie is lonely and miserable. That's punishment enough for Mama.  Papa always says she would make a great Mafia don. She DID like Tim Sway; 

cried when he killed himself.  He wasn't even Charlot-”  Selina cut herself off.  “Either way Ollie must take after him then.  I hope he does.  I think we played together when we were little?”   

She realized she was avoiding the question and wanted to deflect solely on Jess.  Sunny wasn't the only one who slept around up here, or had a weird effect.  Selina again panicked if maybe, somehow, what was in him was in her.  That the Russian on a canoe in the middle of the night would show up in the Village, screaming at her in the dead of night.  Some of the guys she fucked flopped around on top of Selina for a few minutes, got off while she stared at the ceiling.  Then they laid claim to her like any White guy who thought he owned someone else’s land.

“And don't laugh like that either!  I was doing my duty as a future nurse and helping someone who got hurt.”   

She watched Jess cross her arms, even on her back.  She was giving Selina THAT stare.  Selina threw her hands up. “Ohhh,” she whined, ”I was swimming, floating really.  Probably out further than I should be in the middle of the night, but that fucking moon.  And there he was on his way to get rid of those horrendous jet skis of Jimmy’s.  And he was flirtatious and made me groan, but also laugh?” 

Selina had pulled her knees up to her chest so she could hug them.  A far off look on her face.  “And he's very.. I didn't really pay attention to what he looked like.  WHO, right?  It was just this fire that went through me.  Like I knew him?  

“Mama always talks about the day I was born and speaking into existence this notion. That every version of her will be loved by and love Papa.  She thought it was blood loss creating insanity, but Sunny and I had designs on a love like theirs.”

“And the way Nikolai made me feel, and the way he knew my body?  We didn't even fuck; not like that.  I haven't cum that hard or much ever.  Even by myself.”

“Then he got hurt, and I made Sunny take me to him.  Ollie had saved him, right?  As we're stitching him back together, I see his face.  That face I grew up with three times over.  He's fashioned for me, Jess.  Maybe like Ollie is for you.  But Nikolai is Leon and Nicklaus and Klaus and he's made to be mine.” 

"No, no  I'm not laughing at that, or you," Jess promised. "Just...the first decent conversation Nikolai and I had, he mentioned meeting someone. Matching his description to you is what's funny. And the fact that you two are such opposites." Jess paused, smiling in fondness for both parties in question. "But it's safe to say he likes you, a lot." 

She felt silly now, not putting it together sooner. After all, there was no one else in the world she could think more aptly described as a siren made of the moon. And as funny as it was on paper, something about Selina and Nikolai made sense. 

 And, it made her heart beat giddily. Her faith in fate was complicated, but when it came to the Kostases, the concept was shockingly simple. And it seemed impossible that this was just coincidence, the four of them tied together like this. 

'Or maybe,' she silently scolded, 'it's wishful thinking so you can tell yourself you're not being completely crazy.' 

The rest of what Selina said registered belatedly and she blanched. "Wait. That was a lot of blood. Are you saying that it was all Nikolai's?"

“It was,” Selina replied softly.

"Jesus. What did he do, get in a knife fight?" Her voice was a mixture of concern and annoyance. 

She could see Nikolai doing something like that, to defend his own pride which he deflected onto Ollie, or for some other stubborn, idiotic thing. And now that there were two people she loved who would get hurt if something happened to him, she made a note to have a little chat with him about being so reckless. And to find Ollie later to check on both boys. 

"I know if he had you helping take care of him, I don't have to ask if he'll be alright." She nudged Selina teasingly with a shoulder, hoping to break up some of the heavy, contemplative air settling over them both.

“Knives don't cause QUITE as much damage as you think.  Unless you hit a vein.  Diego showed me how to do it effectively once.  Plus if he's like the others, Nikolai probably prefers fists to weapons.  Or the spider monkey sleeper-hold thing Klaus and Sunny do.  Although Papa stabbed Uncle Jonny once, it was just an artificial wound.” 

Selina suddenly scooped Jess up in her arms so they could go back to a cuddle.  She tangled her legs and arms around Jess to sort of dominate her personal space.  Her forehead pressed into her friend’s neck.

“He and Jimmy got into it, and they were on the boat dock.  Nik slipped and hit his head.  Ollie swam for like, the first time ever to get him up into a boat.  Had pressure on it.  I just stitched him with fishing wire.  They'll do better at the ER.”

Selina sighed, “If he's like them he wouldn't die anyways.  Klaus died like twice in a few days, also head injuries?  Either way, Nikolai would’ve been fine without me.”  

Then almost like an afterthought, “Did you say he talked to you about me?  Probably something about conquests and the Russian army.  But you!  YOU FELL IN LOVE this summer!  I got my pussy licked and think he's this mythical soulmate.  You're in actual, real love.”

Selina propped up on her elbow, “Have you slept together?  No I'm sorry,  YOU get to call it MAKING LOVE!!”  she burst into a fit of giggles around cheeks fired by jealousy.  “I am happy for you.  I promise.  I'm glad Sunny..  I'm just happy.”

"No, actually," Jess said, shifting around Selina so they tucked together more cleanly, like two matched puzzle pieces. This kind of closeness wasn't Jess's favorite thing, but Selina knew that, and Jess trusted that if she didn't need it, she wouldn't be initiating it. "It was surprisingly non-militant. And only one nautical reference."

Jess hesitated, remembering some of the incidents Selina had to deal with and one or two more from the summers that  Sunny, or Jess herself, had headed off before they got far enough to be a concern (or for Selina to even know). She wanted her friend to know just what Nikolai had said, and that he very much did not just see her as just some conquest. But the line between sweet and creepy was a hazy one at best. She brought one hand away from the tangle to fret the corner of her thumb between her teeth while she thought it over. 

"I'm not saying I'm jealous...but I thought it was romantic. And dramatic of course, look who we're talking about. But dramatic isn't always bad. I wish you'd stop dismissing yourself like that. Soulmate or no, you have some sort of feelings for him which seem serious; one might call it a crush at least. And he made you feel good. He made you happy. You're allowed that. You deserve it. And now, for the moment if not more, you have it, savor it." 

"As for Ollie and me..." 

She froze, frowning as she struggled to figure out just what to say. There was a part of her that feared a reputation of some kind (even though it was just Ollie that she'd been a first time for, and Sunny, but he didn't count). And another part that wanted to keep it to herself, even though most of her wanted to share. She bit again at her thumb, searching for words. 

"It's not that big of a deal?" 

Selina bit her lip before a yawn escaped her.  “One: a crush is a crush because you can get hurt.  Otherwise, it would be called a cushion.  I think that's what Papa said once.  Or was it Klaus?”  

Selina closed her eyes now. “Either way, it's a very big deal!  I can feel the difference in you.  I want you to be in love.  To maybe leave Sway Lake.  Come back to the city with me?  Close up this place for a few months.  You can live with me.  Or Oliver for a little while. Oh lovely little Oliver making my sweet Jessica come ‘round again.  All your sadness and little pieces everywhere.  I couldn't stitch you back together with fishing wire, could I?  I shouldn't have let Sunny break your heart.  I just didn't want being around me to remind you of him.  I'm sorry.  But Ollie.. he’ll..  Sorry, I think I'm a bit delirious from adrenaline?  Mind if I nap a bit?” 

But Selina was fast asleep before Jess could give permission.

Jess shook her head with a smile, carefully extricating herself and tucking her friend into the bed. Selina had given her a lot to think about.

#hopefully this formatting worked #it was not at first #author collaboration #Jess O'Neill and Selina Kostas #Moonbrella Lake Crossover #The Song of Sway Lake fic

[chicgeekgirl89]

Home is Us

Fandom: 911 Lone Star

Characters: Carlos Reyes, T.K. Strand, Owen Strand, Judd Ryder, Tommy Vega, Mateo Chavez

Summary: In the aftermath of the condo fire, Carlos and T.K. seek comfort in one another. Post ep for 2x12 "The Big Heat."

A/N: This is my rather belated post ep for 2x12. And it would not have happened without @bluenet13. Literally. I agonized over this SO MUCH and she listened to all my whining and didn't let me cut the part about Marlon Blendo so I owe her everything.

AO3

The night air was cool and still, the stars sparkling brightly in the sky, but the stench of smoke obliterated any sense of peace or calm. T.K. could feel Carlos’ hand gripping his shoulder with bruising force as they burst out the front doors and onto the lawn, both of them gasping and coughing.

Tommy came running toward them. “Are you all right?” she asked urgently, eyes and hands searching for damage. “Are you hurt?”

“No, I’m, I’m okay,” T.K. choked out. “Carlos?”

He shook his head, coughing violently. “I’m fine too.”

“T.K.!”

His dad came charging toward him, wrapping him up a fierce hug. “Oh my god,” he breathed into T.K.’s hair and then his other arm was pulling Carlos in too, squeezing them both with every bit of strength he had. “Are you boys all right?”

“We’re good, Dad,” T.K. said, even though he was shaking violently, adrenaline coursing through his veins so fast he felt lightheaded. “What the hell? How did you guys even know we were in trouble?”

“Raymond said something earlier today and I just put the pieces together,” Owen said. “I’m so sorry, I should have figured it out sooner.”

There were sirens screaming up now, ambulances and firetrucks, and Tommy put a hand on Owen’s shoulder. “Okay, there will be time to talk about this later. Right now all of you need to get checked out by the paramedics. No objections,” she said quickly when several mouths opened to protest. “A little oxygen never hurt anybody. Come on now.”

T.K. moved follow her and then realized Carlos wasn’t behind him. He turned to find his boyfriend still rooted to the spot, staring straight ahead at the burning building. “Babe?” T.K. reached for his arm.

Carlos startled at his touch and cleared his throat. “Yeah, I’m coming.”

He was quiet as they sat on the back of the ambulance, answering questions with yes or no answers, eyes and body listless as they checked him over for injuries. T.K. had never seen his boyfriend look so small. 

They were both given oxygen and then Tommy reappeared, blankets in hand that she wrapped comfortingly around their shoulders, her mom tendencies coming out in full force. “Is everyone else all right?” T.K. asked, pushing his mask to the side.

“They’ve all got some first and second degree burns, but they’ll heal up all right. How are you two doing?”

“It could have been a lot worse,” T.K. said. 

“Carlos?” Tommy asked, her eyes softening and taking on a new level of concern.

He met her eyes and nodded. “I’m okay.”

She looked at him a moment longer and then reached out to give his shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “I’m going to go check on the guys. You two stay right here and do as you’re told, got it?”

It wasn’t long before the paramedics released them with instructions to take it easy, stay hydrated, and head to the emergency room if they experienced any concerning symptoms. T.K. was still in disbelief that they’d escaped so unharmed. It was nothing short of miraculous, if you believed in that kind of thing.

Carlos spoke as they walked away from the ambulance, his voice quiet. “I should uh, I should call my parents,” he said.

“Do you want me to do it?” T.K. asked.

Carlos shook his head, already pulling out his phone. “No. No it’s um, they should hear it from me.”

He dialed, taking a shaky breath as he waited for someone to pick up. “Hey Dad.”

The conversation was painful, even from T.K.’s end. He couldn’t make out Gabriel’s words through the phone, but he could hear the unbridled fear in his voice. Carlos on the other hand sounded almost monotone, relaying the story and pertinent information in painfully exact detail, but without an ounce of emotion behind it, slipping back and forth between English and Spanish as he explained.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard him sound so upset before,” Carlos said, when he hung up.

“Yeah.” T.K. looked at his boyfriend who seemed to be refusing to look back. “Carlos? How are you doing?” he finally asked. 

“I’m good,” Carlos said, eyes darting toward him and then away. It was clearly a brush off and they both knew it. So T.K. waited.

And then he watched as his boyfriend broke in front of him, anguish and fear spilling out like a wave until they were both clinging to one another as Carlos’ quiet sobs wracked his frame over and over again.

“Shh,” T.K. soothed, struggling to provide some kind of real comfort when he felt so raw himself. “Breathe. We’re okay. That’s all that matters.”

“I should have known, I should have made the alarm company come out today.”

“Carlos listen to me, none of this is your fault.” T.K. pulled him in tighter, desperate to do something to ease his pain.

“If I had just looked around, if we had waited ten more minutes to go upstairs—“

“We had no way of knowing.”

Carlos pulled back, still shaky. “You can’t really believe that. There’s always something. I should have done better.”

T.K. cupped his face in his hands. “Baby why are you beating yourself up over this so much?”

“Because I’m supposed to protect you!” Carlos said, the words coming out on a ragged sob. “That’s my job. To keep people safe. And when it came down to it I couldn’t protect you. The person I care about most in this world I couldn’t—”

T.K. used his thumbs to wipe away some of Carlos’ tears, clearing his throat, trying to keep his own tears at bay. “Listen to me. We’re a team, remember? We protect each other. You and me. Not just you.”

Carlos shook his head, face still contorted in misery. T.K. pulled him back in again and pressed a kiss to his hair. “It’s okay to be upset. But you cannot blame yourself for this. This was not your fault, do you hear me?”

Carlos nodded against his shoulder, but T.K. wasn’t completely convinced his words had gotten through.

Carlos took a shuddering breath and stepped away, wiping at his eyes and T.K. watched the wall go back up; the one Carlos had carefully constructed around him that meant he was always completely even-tempered and never out of control. “We should uh, we should go check on your dad and everybody. Tell them thank you.”

“Yeah, sure,” T.K. said, feeling like he probably should be saying something more, but unable to find the words.

Carlos was already moving toward the group gathered at the back of the ambulance and T.K. had no choice but to follow him. “You guys all right?” T.K. asked as Judd pulled him in for a side hug.

“We’re just glad you’re both okay,” Judd told him. “Everything check out with the paramedics?”

“We both ate a little bit of smoke, but we’re okay,” T.K. said. “Honestly though,” he swallowed hard, “we probably wouldn’t be here without you guys. So thank you.”

“You’re just lucky your dad drives so fast. I didn’t know he had it in him, what with him being such a city slicker,” Billy said with a chuckle.

“My driving is impeccable and I always drive the exact speed limit. Except in emergency situations,” Owen said, casting a look at Carlos.

Carlos managed to scrounge up half a smile but didn’t say anything.

A truck came screeching to a stop just behind the ambulance and Gabriel Reyes jumped out. The man looked truly shaken, eyes wild as he ran toward them. “Carlos! Mijo are you all right?”

“I’m okay Dad,” Carlos told him as they hugged.

“Gracias a Dios. You’re all okay?” Gabriel asked, looking around the group.

“We got out just in time,” Owen said. “Minor injuries only.”

“Which is more than we can say for the condo,” Judd said. “I’m so sorry we couldn’t do more Carlos, he had that place rigged up good.”

Carlos shook his head. “You did everything you could and we’re…” he swallowed hard and T.K. could tell he was blinking back more tears, “we’re very grateful.”

“Have they taken your statements yet?” Gabriel asked. 

“Yeah, about half an hour ago,” T.K. said. Officers had come around while they were still sitting at the back of the ambulance and written down what little they knew. Nothing like telling complete strangers that you hadn’t realized your house was burning down around you because you were upstairs having sex with your boyfriend. 

“Then there’s no reason you need to be standing around here,” Gabriel said. “You know the ranch is open to you both. Your mother is worried sick, she would be very happy to have you.” He turned to look at Owen. “But perhaps you would rather be closer to work? The ranch is a bit of a drive.”

“Well of course you’re welcome to stay at my place,” Owen said. “There’s plenty of space and Buttercup would love to have you around. But I’m sure Andrea wants you close to her.”

Gabriel shook his head. “I think they’re better off here in town. Andrea will understand. There will be a lot of paperwork to deal with in the coming days, they need to be readily available.”

“Well of course, but I’m not sure how much I can provide in the way of hospitality right now. The investigators didn’t really clean things up when they left,” Owen said meaningfully.

“Not a problem,” Gabriel said, taking out his phone. “I can have a crew there in the morning. It should never have taken this long in the first place. You know sometimes they drag their feet on these things.”

“Oh it’s no problem,” Owen said, waving him off. “Worth it in the end.” 

The dads debated a while longer before they decided an exhausted T.K. and Carlos would stay with Owen for the time being to be closer to work and to their former condo for whatever overhaul was necessary. By that point neither of them really cared where they ended up as long as there was a shower and a bed waiting for them. 

Owen elected to stay at the scene with Gabriel so Judd drove Carlos and T.K. home. Neither of them said much, still in a state of shock and Judd was mindful enough not to try and fill the truck with conversation.

The house was dark, Mateo asleep for the night. Buttercup looked up as they came in and gave half a tail wag before settling back down again.

“I think I left a couple sweatshirts and pairs of pants here,” T.K. said, searching through the drawers in his dad’s guest room. 

“Mmhmm,” Carlos said. He’d sunk onto the end of the bed and was staring blankly at the wall. 

“Hey,” T.K. stopped his search and went to him, cupping his face in his hands. “Why don’t you go get in the shower? I’ll find us something to change into and bring it to you.”

Carlos nodded tiredly and disappeared down the hall. T.K. stood for a moment chewing on his lip. He felt lost, adrift, trying to process and deal with his own feelings of grief and stomach churning worry, and Carlos seemed miles away. T.K. didn’t know what to do except to try and meet his physical needs.

He managed to scrounge up a pair of sweats and a t-shirt he thought would do the job. They might be a little tight, but at least Carlos wouldn’t be sleeping in the stench of his smoky clothes.

T.K. knocked softly on the bathroom door before stepping inside and putting the clothes on the counter. “You all right?” he asked.

Carlos sniffed and cleared his throat. “Yeah. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

T.K. gathered up Carlos’ soiled clothes from the floor and dumped them into the washer, intending to add his after he had his own shower. He heard the water turn off and a minute later the bathroom door opened. “I’m done,” Carlos called softly down the hall.

“I’ll be quick,” T.K. said, switching places with him. 

The water felt good and he watched as soot and sweat and ash slithered down the drain. He took longer than he meant to, almost lulled to sleep by the soothing pound of the water against his back. Eventually it grew cool and he turned it off, stepping out to try and squeeze into a pair of sweatpants that belonged to his dad and a t-shirt he didn’t recognize but had found in the clean laundry.

T.K. left the bathroom still toweling off his hair. He crept quietly toward the guest room; Buttercup didn’t even move as he stepped over him in the hallway. Opening the door he winced when it squeaked, fully expecting to find Carlos completely sacked out in the bed, more than ready to join his boyfriend in blissful sleep.

Instead he found the room empty and a spiral of fear shot through him so fast it took his breath away. “Carlos?” he whispered, as if the man would suddenly materialize from a dark corner or the tiny closet. 

When there was no answer he turned and went back the way he’d come, stepping over Buttercup again, searching the kitchen and the living room before he made his way to the back patio. “Hey,” he said softly when he spotted Carlos sitting on the edge of the outdoor sofa.

Carlos didn’t respond and T.K. felt his worry grow heavier. “Carlos?”

His boyfriend’s shoulders hitched slightly and T.K. walked around the patio furniture to find him hunched over, tears streaming down his face. “Oh baby,” T.K. said, dropping to his knees, hands frantically reaching for him. 

“I’m sorry,” Carlos said hoarsely. “I just…I can’t…I’m trying to pull it together but—”

T.K. slipped onto the couch next to him and pulled him into his arms. “You don’t have to be okay,” he whispered, his own throat thick with emotion. “No one expects that of you.”

Carlos’ voice was hoarse and broken. “I’ve never needed saving before. Not like that.”

“Most people don’t,” T.K. said.

Carlos looked at him, eyes red and swollen. “You were amazing in there. I was…I was panicking and you knew exactly what to do.”

“You’re a police officer,” T.K. said, resting his head on top of Carlos’. “I wouldn’t expect you to know what to do in a five alarm fire. Just like you wouldn’t expect me to know what to do in a shootout.”

Carlos sighed and leaned into him. T.K. bent over and kissed his forehead. “We should try and get some sleep.”

Carlos shook his head again. “I can’t,” he said hoarsely. “I just keep thinking about it over and over again. I’m sorry I’m such a mess—“

“Hey, you don’t need to apologize. Everything you’re feeling is totally normal.”

Carlos swallowed hard. “I know it was just a house. But it was mine. It was the first place I felt like I could be myself. And then you came and it was our home and I—“ Carlos bit his lip and shook his head. “It’s all gone.”

“But I’m not,” T.K. said twining their hands together. “I’m right here. You’ve got me. And I don’t care where we are as long as we’re together. Home is us.” He stroked his thumb up and down on Carlos’ shoulder.

His face sobered as he took a really good, long look at Carlos. Exhaustion and fear still radiated off of him. He looked defeated. Empty. “Let’s at least try to get some sleep,” T.K. said softly, brushing a still-damp, curl from Carlos’ forehead. “We’ll figure things out in the morning.”

He pulled Carlos to his feet and they walked hand in hand back to the guest room. Carlos looked at the clock as he got into bed and groaned. “I have a shift in five hours.”

“You’re not going to work today.” T.K. told him. “They’ll understand.”

Carlos slid down the bed onto his side, leaning up on his elbow, his free hand finding a home on T.K.’s hip. “I meant what I said before. You were incredible tonight T.K. You saved us.”

“I’m pretty sure my dad, Billy, and Judd saved us,” T.K. told him.

Carlos shook his head. “I’m serious. If you hadn’t been there—“

“But I was,” T.K. said firmly. “I was and we’re fine. We’re…going to be fine,” he amended, because god knew there was nothing fine about them right now.

Carlos was quiet for a moment and then laid down all the way so they were face to face. T.K. shifted so they were even closer, needing to feel the warmth of Carlos against his own body. “I don’t think I can sleep,” Carlos said.

“Then we’ll just lie here together,” T.K. told him softly. 

They locked eyes, both of them breathing together in the silence, just being together, holding on a little tighter than normal. “I can’t stop seeing it,” Carlos finally whispered. “I was so scared T.K. What if I’d lost you?”

“You didn’t,” T.K. said softly. He leaned in and pressed a tender, reassuring kiss to Carlos’ lips. Carlos didn’t respond so T.K. nudged him gently with his nose and then kissed him again.

It was slow at first, Carlos still drowning so deeply in loss and anxiety, but as T.K. continued to silently encourage him he began to reciprocate. First just one kiss, and then another, this one a little deeper, until they were completely pressed up against each other, hands searching for bare skin, shared breath moving between parted lips. 

Things grew heated and T.K. could feel the increasing desperation in Carlos’ kisses so he smoothed a hand soothingly down his spine, pulling back from him just a little bit, forcing him to slow down. “It’s okay,” he murmured as their lips broke apart and came back together. “I’m right here.”

Carlos responded by matching T.K.’s slower kisses, following him rather than leading.

T.K. reached between them and slowly undid the drawstring on his boyfriend’s sweatpants. Carlos broke off the kiss. “Are you sure?”

T.K. nodded, moving his hands underneath Carlos’ shirt, helping him pull it off over his head. They both needed this, to touch, to feel, to reassure themselves that they were alive, that this might have changed their night, but it hadn’t change them. 

Carlos started to roll on top of him, but T.K. gently pushed him back down until he was the one on top, chests and hips pressed together, a reversal of their positions from just hours before. Carlos’ hands landed on T.K.’s back, their eyes locking, both of them seeking comfort in the physicality of being together.

“We’re okay,” T.K. said, as much for himself as for Carlos.

Carlos nodded and then closed his eyes as T.K. began pressing kisses into his neck and chest. “We’re okay,” T.K. murmured soothingly every time his lips left Carlos’ skin. “I’m going to say it until you believe it. We’re okay. We will be okay together.”

                                           XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

T.K. woke up in the morning legs still tangled with Carlos’. It took him a moment to remember why he had a pounding headache and his muscles felt tight. Right. Burning condo. Smoke inhalation. Mad dash for their lives.

Carlos was still deeply asleep, for which T.K. was grateful. His boyfriend had drifted off in his arms somewhere around three am and T.K. had quickly followed. He managed to extricate himself without waking Carlos and pulled on some clothes before he headed out to the kitchen in search of painkillers. 

Sun was just filtering in the windows, the day already bright and clear. It was incredible how the world could continue to turn, even when everything had just crashed down around you. T.K. found some Advil, leaving it out on the counter, knowing it was likely that Carlos would be in need of some too. Then he moved their now clean, damp clothes from the washer to the dryer. They’d need to go out today and get some essentials. 

“T.K.?” Mateo asked in surprise as he appeared at the base of the stairs.  “I thought you and Carlos made up?” He paused and frowned in confusion. “Is that my shirt?”

T.K. sighed and launched into an edited version of the night’s events. “Dude,” Mateo said when he finished, a stunned look on his face. “Man that sucks. I’m glad you guys are all right.”

“Yeah, us too,” T.K. said.

“And listen, my house just totally blew up too. It was a rental, so not quite the same, but if you guys need help with any part of this process just let me know. You can borrow my car or laptop or whatever you need.”

“Thanks Mateo,” T.K. said gratefully.

There were footsteps on the stairs and Carlos appeared, eyes bleary and swollen, curls a disheveled mess. There was still a heaviness about him, but he looked better than the night before.

“Hey,” he said, wrapping an arm around T.K.’s waist and giving him a kiss, lingering slightly longer than their normal morning peck. “Hi Mateo.”

“Hey Carlos. T.K. told me about your place, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s definitely not ideal,” Carlos said with a sigh.

“Did you sleep okay?” T.K. asked.

Carlos nodded, then winced. T.K. reached for the bottle of Advil and poured him a glass of water. “Thanks,” Carlos said, swallowing down two pills.

“Did you call your captain?” T.K. asked as Mateo grabbed a protein bar and vacated the kitchen to give them some privacy.

“Yeah he’d already heard. Told me to take the time I need.”

“Good,” T.K. said.

The dryer buzzed. “That’s our clothes,” T.K. said, getting up to retrieve them. “At least you can put on a shirt that fits.”

He tossed Carlos his shirt and pants. Carlos stared down at them, a frown on his face. “You okay?” T.K. asked.

“Why did you throw a shirt at me?”

“What?”

“Last night. We were about to be burned alive and you made me put a shirt on.”

“Oh,” T.K. thought for a second and shrugged as he folded his sweatpants and set them on top of the dryer. “I don’t know. I guess I just…panicked. I was thinking that the temperature drops here at night and I didn’t want you to be cold when we got outside.”

“Our condo was hot as hell, but you were worried I’d be cold?”

T.K. bit his lip and shook his head, a sheepish smile growing on his face. “I don’t know, like I said I panicked. It was the first thought that came to me.”

“Well it was a good one,” Carlos said, slipping his arms around T.K.’s waist. “Standing out there all night with no shirt on would have been pretty uncomfortable.”

T.K. threaded his arms through Carlos’, hands coming to rest on his lower back. “You doing okay this morning?” he asked.

“Better,” Carlos confirmed. “Thank you. I think I just…needed to let it all out. I’m sorry about last night. My head was…”

“Hey,” T.K. shook his head. “No more apologies. No one has anything to apologize for, right?” He brushed a hand over Carlos’ cheek. “Do you want coffee? Or a smoothie?” His eyes went wide as a thought hit him. “Oh no!”

“What? What’s wrong?” Carlos asked, concern dropping over his face like a cloud. T.K.’s distress was so sudden and visceral that he pulled back slightly, eyes searching T.K.’s frame for some kind of injury.

T.K. felt his chest growing tight as anxiety gripped him. “Marlon Blendo! Oh my god, my dad is going to be so upset!”

“Whoa.” Carlos cupped his face in his hands. “I’m sure your dad will be okay. Blenders are replaceable.”

“Carlos he really loved that blender,” T.K. said seriously. 

Carlos chuckled. “Here I am, wondering all night long how we’re going to get through this and how you can be so calm when the world has literally gone up in flames, and now you’re losing it over a blender.”

“He was a really good blender!” T.K. pulled away from him and ran a hand through his hair as he took a few aimless steps, more thoughts striking him. “Oh my god my hoodies!”

“I will buy you new hoodies,” Carlos assured him.

“They won’t be the same,” T.K. groaned.

“Is this you finally freaking out?”

“I am not freaking out!” T.K.’s breathing had increased rapidly as panic spiraled through him. The sense of calm control he’d felt for the past twelve hours slowly started to slip away as reality set in. “Oh my god I’m totally freaking out. I can’t freak out, you’re freaking out! We can’t both be freaking out!”

“Hey,” Carlos cradled his face in his hand. “We’re okay? Remember? And if you need to freak out and lose it, that’s all right. It’s your turn. I’ll pull it together for a couple hours and you can melt down.”

“I don’t want to melt down, I want my shirt with the blue stripes on it. And that bergamot candle your parents gave us as a housewarming gift. Oh my god, Carlos all your spices from the market!”

“Come here,” Carlos said, pulling him into a hug, one hand holding him firmly around the waist, the other settling on the nape of his neck, thumb moving back and forth in a soothing motion.

T.K. let his forehead rest against Carlos’ shoulder, feeling more grounded by the strength of his boyfriend’s arms and the softness of his fingers. “Thanks,” he mumbled. 

T.K. took a breath as the weight of everything began to land on his shoulders. Losing their home. Almost losing each other. God, how was he only now feeling how terrible it all was? He’d truly thought he was okay until this very second. “We’re going to make it through this, right?” he asked. He’d been so sure last night, but now…

Carlos pressed a kiss to the side of his head. “Yes. We are.”

                                       XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

A/N: When I started writing this, did I think it would end up in the boys having soft, sweet "we're so glad we're not dead" sex in Owen's guest room? Nope. No I did not. Is it all @bluenet13's fault that it happened? Possibly. Or possibly they're just too sexy and they couldn't help it. Idk.

#911 Lone Star #911 LS #Tarlos #Carlos Reyes #TK Strand #Tarlos Fic #2x12 #The Big Heat #Post Ep #Home is Us #Emotional Hurt/Comfort

[ushidoux]

Be My Last - Iwaizumi x  Reader (Pt. 3)

Summary: You have trouble getting over a past relationship and it’s preventing you from moving forward. (~2.5k words)

Warnings: again poor communication!!! angst, no sex in this chapter

A/N: Let me know what you think!

Part 1|| Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5

---

“Oi, you fucking bastard, you knew!”

Iwa losing his temper over the phone wasn’t exactly atypical, even if it had become a less frequent occurrence, but for once Oikawa was actually genuinely surprised to hear his friend this angry over the phone. Especially given that it was almost 2pm in San Juan, which made it the very early AM in Tokyo, so whatever had worked him up had also kept him up way past his bedtime, given that Iwa was now extremely careful about his sleep hygiene. 

Oikawa took enough time to properly swallow the bite he’d just taken of his choripan before answering.

“What did I know, Iwa-chan?” He finally inquired, setting down his sandwich in the wrapper spread across his lap before leaning back into the park bench on which he was sitting. It was a wonderful sunny day, the type of day where it was a shame you were being yelled at, he mused briefly.

“About ___ and Ushijima.”

Oikawa’s eyebrows furrowed, not that Iwa could see the confusion on his face. There was a short pause which Oikawa broke eventually.

“Am I missing something or…?” His genuinely confused tone didn’t serve in any way to make Iwa less irritated.

“You didn’t say anything!” He hissed loudly enough that Oikawa winced, holding his cellphone a good distance from his ear before answering. “You used to tell me about that motherfucker’s every move, and now that it’s useful information, you have nothing to say?”

Oikawa frowned.

“Why are you blaming me for your communication issues, Iwa-chan?!” He all but whined.

When Iwa’s voice grew silent on the other line, Oikawa grew slightly nervous. But he was right. This was a particularly severe lapse in communication between Iwa and you that he was now projecting onto him, severe because clearly it had ended up being a bigger deal than it should have been in the first place.

As much as Iwa didn’t want to admit it, yesterday evening was evidence that something was very, very wrong in his relationship with you, or at the very least a residual tangled web of feelings to sort out, and it wasn’t exactly something he could easily fix or improve on his own. 

Not that he wouldn’t try. 

“What happened?” Oikawa finally asked, and Iwa retreated.

“Nothing. I’ll… talk to you later.”

The phone cut off on Iwa’s end and Oikawa sighed with mild irritation before returning to his lunch thousands of miles away.

On the other side of the globe, Iwa made his way from the balcony to the bedroom, setting his phone down on the nightstand and taking a glance at you who had appeared to be finally sleeping soundly, but betrayed by the intermittent soft hiccups of someone who had been crying just moments earlier. 

He hadn’t meant to make you cry. In fact, he hadn’t even meant to force another discussion at all, but hours after the last guests had filed out, none the wiser about the fight that had just transpired earlier (even if Hinata had made a single innocent comment about the bruise blooming on Ushijima’s cheek), the elephant in the room had grown entirely too large for him to bear. Unfortunately, the simple demand for clarification had spiraled out of control and ended up with a shouting match which had culminated in you bursting into tears.

It wasn’t a good look for him to behave like this. 

Even so, Iwa couldn’t stop thinking about how the subject of your argument had replied to his grumbled apology with the admission that he probably deserved the hit for all he’d done. Somehow, the persistent remorse in his voice made Iwa consider hitting him a second time for good measure. 

That wouldn’t be the right move either. There wasn’t really a right move, was there? All Iwaizumi could do was hope that everything would blow over. 

You loved him after all; he was sure of it.

---

you knew, didn’t you?

knew what?

You grit your teeth at the quickly returned text message, then set your phone down at your desk letting out a hushed but aggravated sigh, before picking it up again and typing furiously. 

you texted me, ‘how’s everything going?’ right before all that shit happened.

that could mean literally anything??? What???

You didn’t know how much longer your friend was going to feign innocence, but it looked like not very long because once your eyes flitted back to the unfinished project proposal you had been working on, your phone quickly buzzed again. 

By the time you had told her what happened this morning on your morning commute to work, she had grown a little too quiet, interjecting very little as you spoke and not asking any clarifying questions. You had assumed that she had just been being extra considerate, but now that it was early afternoon and there was a lull in your concentration, it occurred to you again just how clearly she must have anticipated the awkward situation.

YOU said you didn’t follow sports anymore + it’s been 3 years. HOW was I supposed to know you were going to overreact?

Overreact?

There was a small pause in which you saw her speech bubble pop up and then down, and then up again.

Not overreacting I guess, but I’m just confused… Don’t you and Iwa talk? How did it become a huge deal?

You decided you didn’t really have an answer to that. All you could do was return a noncommittal idk, letting the conversation die out and returning back to the task at hand.

---

“Mommy, why does he look like that?”

Ushijima glanced for a split second at the small child pointing openly at him, giving a small, understanding nod to the mortified mother trying to quiet her son’s whispers before continuing on his way back to his hotel.

His face didn’t exactly throb anymore, but the bruise he had been gifted with was very noticeable even if he had to be thankful he didn’t have a black eye. Iwa had hit him surprisingly hard, which was good. At the very least, he could count on him to protect you.

Getting hit in the face by your athletic trainer wasn’t ideal but he and Iwaizumi were both professionals. They could put it past them.

Even if they didn’t have a deep friendship, there was a sort of camaraderie since they’d met in California years ago. That relationship didn’t have to sour, he told himself. 

He just needed to give you two a wide berth. 

Even if he didn’t want to, he had to. It was the right, mature thing to do. 

Even if he didn’t miss on the court, he’d missed a crucial set in life. 

He had no right to demand a second chance.

---

You hadn’t traveled home alone in a while, you realized, as you set pace towards your apartment after a long shift. The subway was cramped as usual, but the closeness of the quarters felt more noticeable and uncomfortable now that Iwa’s hand wasn’t holding yours and keeping you close to him. He’d messaged you about an hour before you were about to leave work to give you a heads up that he would be returning late, and for a moment, you wondered if it were really true or if he was still mad at you.

But you knew Iwa well enough to be confident that he didn’t hold grudges, and if he were still uncomfortable he would tell you - he would never actively avoid you. 

Then again, you hadn’t had a conflict like this before.

I don’t love him, I only love you, you’d said to him almost screaming, defensive because Iwa’s voice had sounded hurt when you failed to come up with the words to explain why you were so shaken still.

You’d meant that with your whole heart. So why exactly did you react so poorly? 

Maybe it was the final death rattle of unresolved feelings, rearing their ugly head before being banished to whatever realm past hurts went once they were healed.

When you finally made it to your apartment, you stood for a moment at the entryway after flipping the light switch, taking a couple of seconds to blink away the fact that things didn’t look quite right. 

For a moment, you couldn’t remember exactly when you had replaced your TV - was that before or after Ushijima? Had that couch always been in that position? 

Fatigue even made you wonder where your houseplants had gone, until you remembered you had all but given them all away, telling yourself that those last vestiges of your relationship would have to vanish before you could truly count yourself moved on.

Now that the plants were gone, were you truly over it?

You let out a sigh and set your keys down before shooting a message to Iwa to let him know that you had made it home. That proposal wouldn’t write itself, and you could tackle it anew once you’d treated yourself with a warm bath and a modest glass of wine.

---

Seated in his soon-to-be minimally used office, Iwaizumi leafed through the short stack of papers before him, including prior athletic history and a formal written statement from the team physician. Satisfied, he gathered the documents and gently pushed them across the desk towards the silent, patiently waiting athlete sitting across from him.

“It looks like you’re cleared for practice tomorrow,” he said, offering a measured smile to Ushijima.

“Not that I expected any issues,” Iwa continued, compelled to keep speaking from the lack of response from the man before him. While he didn’t exactly sense hostile energy from Ushijima, it seemed like he was even more difficult to read than usual. 

Then again, Iwa was unsure if he was projecting; he acknowledged that prior to this very moment in time, he had been more standoffish than usual, having avoided unnecessary interaction with Ushijima during the day’s orientation activities.

He took a surreptitious glance at the wall clock above his head. There were only two more members to clear after Ushijima and then he’d be done for the day and could go back home to you, maybe picking up sushi on the way home as a peace offering.

Ushijima didn’t exactly look like he was getting ready to leave, but Iwa hadn’t explicitly dismissed him.

The two sat in an awkward silence and Iwa wondered if he should apologize again to settle the stagnant air between them, not knowing that the man before him was considering the exact same thing. 

What happens now? seemed to be the question du jour.

“How’s your father?” Iwa asked abruptly, shifting in his chair and leaning forward on elbows propped onto the desk, maybe a little too forward, in attempts to keep his mind off the fact that the volleyball player before him had also played with his love’s heart.

“He’s been well. Thank you for asking.”

Another pause ensued and Iwa was running out of ways to tell him politely to get out of his office for his next client, but for once Ushijima was the one to break the silence.

“I want us to have a good working relationship despite everything.”

The statement hung in the air for a second before settling and Iwa could feel irritation start to bubble in the pit of his stomach once again, but instead he forced a pleasant smile.

“Of course.”

---

With feet tucked beneath you, your laptop perched on the glass coffee table and a half-drunk glass of white wine (refilled once) atop the end table next to the couch, the sad truth was that you had only written about five lines in the past 45 minutes. 

Instead, against all the advice you’d ever been given in your life, you had sleuthed your way into your ex’s Instagram and Facebook accounts, gleaning as much information as you could about what had happened after you were two, after you’d blocked him cold turkey on every social media application and vowed never to look back.

As expected, the pictures and life updates he posted were few and far between, but there were still some to learn from, especially when you looked through those snapshots taken by others in his life. You were initially surprised to see old pictures of you together still up if you went back far enough, but clicked past them quickly because the fact that you looked so happy was more irritating than sad at this point of time. 

You took another sip of your wine, feeling a soft warmth in your cheeks and a light pleasant haze fill your head while you kept perusing. Some pictures you recognized from his prior team here, Schweiden Adlers, and then there were other promotional images from a new team, Orzel Warsawa... He had even traveled to Poland without your knowledge, you mused.

You took special note of women he looked all too close to for friendship as you browsed, noting a gorgeous, tall blonde in several pictures he appeared to have dated for a brief stint of a couple of months.

1 short relationship in three years. It was a shame, you thought. They could have had the prettiest kids.

And there, you finally realized your internal monologue was crazy. Why were you doing this again?

You threw back the final bit of wine and switched back to your Word document. Maybe writing while a little tipsy wasn’t the best of ideas but any words on the page were better than none.

…

It didn’t take long for you to doze off and your boyfriend to find you sprawled on your belly on the sofa, your glass empty and precariously placed at the edge of the sofa, and your laptop placed just inches above your head.

Iwa’s smile was immediate as he admired your silly position while setting down dinner, quickly walking over to gather you up for bed.

You murmured slightly as he scooped you into his arms, your face instinctively nuzzling his chest. He couldn’t help but think of how cute you were, kissing your forehead softly before tucking you under the covers. You had been so exhausted lately from work, so he’d let you get some early shuteye rather than disturb your peace.

Leaving the bedroom to eat dinner alone on the couch, he noted your laptop in suboptimal location, moving it to the table before sitting down to avoid a future accident.

It flashed on with the slight movement, revealing a lengthy document with heavy blocks of text, which he saved just in case because autosave failure would bring you to tears. He then clicked out, only to see the results of your cyberstalking session.

His heart may have skipped a beat or two but he closed your laptop instead, leaning back into his chair to finish eating dinner.

The uneasiness that filled his stomach instead had to be related to the raw fish he’d brought home. 

There was simply no other explanation, couldn’t be.

#iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi hajime x reader #iwa x reader #ushijima x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #iwaizumi #iwaizumi hajime #ushijima #haikyuu x reader #ushijima wakatoshi #series: be my last #mae.writing

[madpanda75]

“Taking Chances Part 12: The Aftermath”

See how everyone reacts to Theo’s attack on the reader. Feelings get hurt, relationships are exposed, people shout. This chapter is ALL ANGST and FEELS! 😭

Trigger Warning: This chapter mentions assault and rape.

One thing at a time. That was all you could only focus on. Otherwise the reality of what had just happened would overwhelm you. Just one step at a time as you walked into the precinct with your family, Fin, and Amanda.

“Are you sure you don’t need to go to the hospital?” Amanda asked.

“I’m fine,” you mumbled, having barely spoken since Theo ran out of the gallery that morning. The metallic taste of blood still lingered on your tongue from where he had smacked you. 

Liv walked out of her office to greet you and your family, but before she could say anything, your father spoke up. “Please tell me you’re gonna get this bastard.” 

“Dom!” your mom scolded 

“No! Don’t ‘Dom’ me. That monster assaulted my baby. I could go out there right now and take care of it.”

“Dad! Please!” Bella interjected. “Let the cops do their job!”

“Ok, everyone lets calm down,” Olivia said over the bickering.

Your eyes darted between your sister and parents, arguing over what was best for you in this situation. You felt like a child, small and helpless. You also felt partly responsible for the unnecessary stress and worry your family was feeling right now. 

Mustering as much strength as you could, you reached into the darkest depths and found your voice. “I should’ve fought harder!” Your words reverberated around the room. Everyone halted and turned their attention to you. “I should’ve followed Phoebe to the front door. I know how she forgets to lock the door.” 

Olivia gently squeezed your shoulder. “You did exactly what you had to do. You survived.”

“She’s right,” Bella chimed in and wrapped her arm around you.

Your mom nodded and ran her fingers through your hair. “I’m just so grateful to God that you’re ok.” She sniffled and kissed you on the cheek. “My patatina.”

Just then a slightly sweaty and out of breath Rafael burst into the precinct. It looked as if he had run all the way from his office. “Y/N!” He pulled you into a tight embrace before realizing that bum rushing you after you had just been assaulted was not the best idea. Wanting to respect your personal space, he immediately jumped back. His eyes scanned your body for any injuries. “Are you ok?”

Tears welled in your eyes. “As well as can be expected.” 

With a tentative hand, he reached out and cupped your cheek. You trembled under his touch and wrapped your arms around him. Rafael enveloped you, silently praying to God, the Devil, or whatever Deity existed that kept you safe.

The squad looked at each other in total shock while witnessing the public display of affection between you and Rafael. 

Fin subtly turned towards Amanda. “Did you know these two were--”

“Nope,” she murmured. “And from the looks of it neither did Liv.”

“Let’s talk in here,” Olivia said, gently leading you away from Rafael and towards an empty interrogation room.

“Why don’t I get everyone a real cup of coffee other than that sludge they have here,” Rafael offered.

Your mother smiled. “Thank you. That would be nice.”

“I’ll take a latte,” Fin teased only to receive a deadpan stare from Rafael.

While everyone went their separate ways, Amanda and Fin got to work on getting an arrest warrant. “Wow. Barba and Carisi’s younger sister.” Fin shook his head in disbelief. 

“That explains why Carisi’s been acting the way he has,” Amanda said while searching on her laptop for Theo’s office building.

“Think Barba gave him the shiner?”

“I don’t know.” Amanda glanced up and saw a frantic Sonny bounding into the precinct. “But here’s your chance to ask him.”

“Where is she? Where’s my sister?” Sonny demanded.

“She’s in there talking to Olivia,” Amanda said. Sonny looked to where his partner was pointing. It was the interrogation room used to talk to victims. Victim. His sister was a victim. He couldn’t even wrap his mind around the concept. Through the window, he could see you sitting in between your mom and Bella while your dad paced back and forth in the background. 

He barged into the room without even knocking. “Son, why don’t you wait outside,” your father said, trying to lead Sonny out of the room. 

But he side swept him and knelt down in front of you. Tears were streaming down your cheeks. “Y/N, I’m so---”

You pushed Sonny away before he could finish. “I’m going to be sick,” you whimpered and ran to the bathroom. Your sister and mom trailed after you, each giving him a severe look.

Sonny stepped out of the interrogation room and plopped down in his chair, slamming his fist down on the desk so hard the metal rattled beneath his quivering hand. 

“Hey,” Fin said. “Don’t sweat it, Carisi. We’re gonna get this creep.”

“Yeah,” he mumbled and reached into his drawer for the Pepto Bismol. The Carisi nerves reared its ugly head. He felt green. His stomach churned with guilt, grief, and whatever was leftover from breakfast. 

Rafael stepped back into the bullpen with coffee and bagels from your favorite deli, knowing you probably hadn’t eaten a thing all day. Unfortunately for him, it was another Carisi he found. He brushed past Sonny towards Fin and Amanda. “Where are we with Theo?” 

“Just finishing up this arrest warrant. Although it’s gonna be hard to get a judge to sign off on it with so little evidence,” Fin said. Rafael shuddered at the thought of you undergoing a rape kit. Having a SANE nurse poke, scrape, and prod you, searching for DNA, fingerprints, skin, and semen.

“That’s SVU for ya’.” Amanda sighed. “A victim’s word is never good enough.”

Rafael whipped out his cell phone. “I’ll call in some favors at the office. Give them a heads up about the warrant. And for the record, I’m glad there wasn’t a lot of evidence.” He glared at the back of Sonny’s head. “This could’ve been a lot worse.”

Feeling Rafael’s eyes on him, Sonny turned. “What?” he snapped. “Ya’ got somethin’ to say. So just say it.”

“You just couldn’t leave us alone could you?” Rafael shook his head in disgust and started towards the interrogation room to dole out coffee and bagels when Sonny’s voice stopped him.

“What the hell does that mean?” he sneered

Rafael scoffed. “Don’t play naive now. Grow up and realize your actions have consequences.”

Fin watched as the two men provoked each other. “Hey, fellas. Chill.”

Sonny ignored Fin and walked over to Rafael, getting right in his face. “If you think for one second—”

“Guys c’mon,” Amanda chimed in. “ Don’t do this.”

Rafael held his ground. “I think that when you invited Theo you were stupid enough to believe that she would crawl back to him. And because of you that monster almost raped her.”

Sonny’s blood boiled. “How dare you! I love my sister more than anythin’ in this world.”

Rafael let out a mirthless laugh. “Got some way of showing it!” 

Everyone stopped their work and began inching closer towards the two men to get a prime view of the potential fight. Some of the junior officers had their phones out ready to capture the action. All eyes of the precinct were on Rafael and Sonny. 

Sensing this was seconds away from coming to blows, Fin stepped in. “Barba, that’s enough!”

Rafael eluded Fin’s attempt to keep the peace and continued, “I don’t care if she is your sister. I love that woman more than anything in this world and I will do anything to protect her. Especially since her brother doesn’t know how to.”

“Stop it! Both of you!” Your voice pierced the air, causing everything and everyone to come to a screeching stop. 

Rafael took a step toward you. “Y/N, I’m--”

“No!” you interrupted. “I can’t take it anymore. I can’t take this fighting. If you can’t behave like civilized human beings then get out!” You pushed past the small crowd that had formed and went back into the interrogation room with your mom and sister. 

Amanda clapped her hands. “Alright, guys. Show’s over.” As the crowd dispersed she went back to her desk, raising her brow in a manner that said, ‘Serves you boys right.’

Rafael cleared his throat and sat in an empty chair while Sonny went over to his desk. The two men were silent with Rafael staring at his phone and Sonny chugging more Pepto Bismol. Being scolded in front of the entire precinct was enough humiliation to suffer through for one day.

One hour later and the interrogation room door opened. “Is she ok?” Sonny asked Bella.

 “She was just assaulted by her ex. How do ya’ think she is?” Bella snapped.

“Bella!” your mom reprimanded before turning to her son. “Give your sister some time. She’ll come around.” She kissed his cheek and left.

The minute you came out Rafael popped up out of his chair. He had been acting like an expectant father, pacing the floor and waiting. “Do you need anything? How’d it go?”

“Ok,” you said with a shrug. “I’m gonna go home with my folks. I’ll call you later.”

Rafael nodded. A cocktail of terror, relief, and anger etched into his face. You gave him a half smile. It was the most emotion you could muster. As you walked away, both of you knew that after today your relationship would never be the same.

****

The hours may have ticked by, but for Sonny time stood still. While Rafael and the others had left, he hadn’t moved from his desk.

“What are you still doing here?” Olivia asked when she stepped out of her office, surprised to see him alone and staring off into space rather than at home.

“My family hates me,” he softly said.

Olivia sighed and pulled up a chair. “No they don’t.”

“I didn’t...I mean when I invited Theo...I never thought…” He couldn’t finish his train of thought, a lump rising in his throat which he bitterly swallowed back down. The words that Rafael spit at him earlier still stung. Although it was nothing compared to the guilt and shame he felt. 

“Hey, this is not your fault,” Olivia sternly said. “You can’t think like that.”

Sonny studied his scuffed shoes and nodded his head when he heard Theo’s voice. “Watch it will ya’! That’s police brutality!” 

“Keep moving,” Fin said, leading your ex-fiance into the precinct with Amanda following behind. 

In an instant Sonny lunged at Theo, gripping him by the collar and shoving him against the wall. “You sonofabitch!” he growled. “You attacked my little sister!” 

Fin tried to separate the two men, but he was no match for Sonny, who’s anger gave him almost superhuman strength.

“Hey! Get off me, man!” Theo exclaimed and tried to wrench free from the vice-like grip his friend had on him. 

Sonny slammed Theo’s head into the wall again, so hard that it practically vibrated around the room. “I trusted you with her!” 

“Someone help!” Theo shouted. It took several officers to get Sonny off him.

“Ya’ know, I could sue the NYPD for this,” Theo said as he was led to the cage.

Amanda rolled her eyes. “Yeah, go ahead and try that after you’re found guilty of assault and attempted rape.”

Before Olivia or anyone else could reprimand Sonny for his behavior, he grabbed his jacket and left, unable to stand being in the same room as your attempted rapist. 

****

Not wanting to be alone in your apartment, you ended up spending the night at your parents’ house. As you laid in bed in your childhood bedroom, staring up at old boyband posters, you thought of Theo. How many memories you had shared in this room. From endless games of Bop-It when you were kids to sneaky makeout sessions during your teen years, always ready to split apart in case your mom came barging in. 

It was amazing how much life had changed since then. How much Theo had changed. From the sweet innocent boy next door to a conniving monster. Perhaps that evil streak was always in him, kept well hidden in the darkest corners of his being, but over time became more difficult to conceal. Until today when that mask he wore so well, fell and revealed his true self.

As hard as it was, you tried not to waste too much energy thinking about the happenings of today, especially when you had Rafael. You tried to call him several times that night, but every attempt ended with your thumb hovering over the call button before eventually giving up. 

You didn’t know what to say, and in reality you didn’t want to say anything. You wanted to go back to when life was simpler. To when life was easy. But there was no going back, so instead you shoved your phone under the pillow and tried to sleep.

*****

Since you had never called Rafael, you weren’t too surprised to find him standing outside your apartment building the next morning when Teresa dropped you off. “Want me to go in with you?” she asked.

“No, that’s ok. I need to speak to Rafael in private.” 

As you stepped out of the car, Teresa smiled and waved at your boyfriend. “Poor bastard,” she muttered to herself.

“Hi,” Rafael said,

“Hi,” you replied. “What are you doing here?” 

“You didn’t call last night so I came to check on you.” He followed you inside and into the elevator. You wanted to scream at him to stop being so damn nice, to stop making this harder than it had to be, but instead you were silent. 

When you got to your door, you hesitated. What if Theo was in there. Of course, you knew that was nonsensical. Fin and Amanda had arrested him last night; however, that did nothing to quell your fear.

Noticing your reluctance, Rafael spoke up, “Do you want me to check?”

“No,” you said before sighing in defeat. “Yes, please.” You waited outside for several minutes before he came out and gave you the all clear.

Rafael had intended to spend the day doing whatever you wanted to do whether that was to sit and talk or just to hold you while you cried. Instead, he followed you into your bedroom and watched you pull out a suitcase and begin to pack.

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“Packing,” you replied. Rafael crossed his arms and arched his brow, not in the mood for your sarcasm, especially since he was up all night worried sick. “I’m taking off work for a while so I’m going over to my sister’s place. I can’t stay here alone right now.”

Rafael followed you around the bedroom like a lost puppy as you moved from the dresser to the bathroom and back. “You can stay at my place if you want.”

“You have work,” you said.

“I know, but I can easily work from home right now if you need me.” He sauntered up behind you and started to massage your shoulders only to have you jump a mile high and flinch away from his touch.

“I’m sorry,” he said and immediately stepped away from you. As you continued to stuff your suitcase, Rafael began to get a funny feeling deep in the pit of his stomach. A premonition that something was coming. “Are you ok?”

You began to shake and it was only after a moment that Rafael realized it was because you were laughing. “Am I ok?” Your laugh grew stronger until it was maniacal. “I was just assaulted!  My family is falling apart! My life is falling apart! I am not ok!” 

You grabbed a photo of your family from your nightstand and threw it as hard as you could, watching it hit the wall and fall to the ground, the glass shattering. It felt good to unleash your anger, addicting almost. Your hand trembled from the adrenaline. Soon you were tearing apart your bedroom: throwing clothes, tugging the curtains off their rods, knocking a vase and art books off your dresser. Rafael stood there in silence while you had your tantrum, figuring you needed to release your pent up emotions after such a harrowing experience.

Once you had exhausted yourself, you collapsed on the bed out of breath. “I think we should take a break.”

At your admission, Rafael’s heart stopped. “Excuse me?”

“I think we should take a break,” you repeated. 

Rafael felt completely blindsided. He had expected there would be some tough times ahead given Theo and the assault, but he was not prepared for this. “Why?”

You let out a breath and hoped Rafael would understand. “I need to be on my own right now,” you explained. “I need space to clear my head and battle my demons. I need to learn how to take care of this myself.”

“We take care of each other. That’s what a relationship is.”

“What about work? I saw the looks of the squad’s faces when they realized we were together.”

Your words sliced through Rafael, exposing his deepest insecurities. “I thought you didn’t care what people thought about us,” he quietly said.

Unable to face him and see the pain in his eyes, you focused on tugging a hangnail instead. “I don’t, but I don't want to ruin your career and if we’re together that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”

There was silence between you both as Rafael tried to process your words. He ran a hand over his face and braced himself against the wall before kneeling down in front of you. “This is just temporary, right? Things will calm down and then we’ll be back together.”

You shrugged. “Maybe. I’m not sure. To be honest I’m not sure of anything right now.”

Rafael scoffed. “Let me guess, this is one of those ‘Don’t call me, I’ll call you’ kind of things, right?”

“That’s not fair,” you mumbled.

“I’m sorry. I just...I was willing to fight for us. To fight for you. I thought you felt the same way. But I was very very wrong.” Having nothing more to say, Rafael stood up and left.

You remained sitting on the bed, listening to his footsteps move down the hall, farther and farther away. It was only when you heard the door close that you gave yourself permission to cry. 

Not wanting to be in this place another minute, you grabbed your suitcase and left, leaving your bedroom a disaster. Teresa was waiting for you outside. You stuffed your suitcase in the back of her car and hopped into the passenger seat. “Wanna talk about it?” she asked when she noticed you crying.

You shook your head and looked out the side view mirror as she drove away. Through your tears you could’ve sworn you saw Rafael walking down the street, his figure getting smaller and smaller until he blended in with the crowd and then there was nothing.

Tag List:

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[wefoundloveunderthelight]

Mystery Of Pixie Hollow by GleefullyCaptainSwan Chapter 2/11

Read on AO3: | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2

Or on FF

Stacy's Tortured Crew: @teamhook @kmomof4 @stahlop @lfh1226-linda @ilovemesomekillianjones @itsfabianadocarmo @mariakov81 @qualitycoffeethings @zaharadessert @jrob64 @jonesfandomfanatic @natascha-ronin @tiganasummertree @xarandomdreamx @therooksshiningknight @batana54 @superchocovian @onceratheart18 @ultraluckycatnd @snowbellewells @karlyfr13s @the-darkdragonfly @xsajx @deckerstarblanche @jonesfandomfanatic

Chapter 2: Shared Experience

“Mom.”

Emma ran through the halls, slamming her fists against the glass, breaking each mirror in front of her as she searched frantically.

“Mom.”

Her heart was pounding, each space behind the mirror was a deep black void.

“Mom.”

Arms were grabbing her, pulling her into the void, dragging her deep into the blackness.

“Emma.” She jerked awake, her eyes squinting against the light shining through the window. “Bloody hell, what are you doing sitting in front of an open window? Where’s Henry?”

Emma jumped up from her chair. “Henry.” She said frantically, staring out the window toward Pixie Hollow. Her mouth went dry at the empty lot staring back at her. It was all gone. Everything. He was gone.

“I got your texts this morning, my damn phone must have died while I was working, but they didn’t make any sense.”

“Henry, we were at the park, I couldn’t find him.”

“What do you mean, you couldn’t find him? Where’s he at?”

She sunk down on the floor below the window, sobbing. “Gone.” She cried, wrapping her arms around her knees, and rocking softly back and forth as her head made contact with the wall behind her.

“Gone where? Emma you aren’t making a lot of sense here.”

“We were in one of those fun houses, you know the kind with the mirrors. Henry loves those.” She started rambling. “He was playing, he always thinks its funny when I can’t find him. But then he was gone. I couldn’t find him anywhere. I heard him call for me, but he vanished, Will.”

“Vanished. Well surely they had a lost and found, or…”

“No, they didn’t care, they acted like he fucking ran away.” She shouted. “The police told me to come back in 24 hours, but they’re gone, the whole thing is fucking gone.” She screamed, pointing toward the parking lot where the fair used to be.

“Get up, we’re going to talk to the cops. This is bloody ridiculous. Henry isn’t a runaway. No one could believe that for a second. This doesn’t make any sense.”

Will was pacing the floor in front of her before he turned and grabbed her by the hand, pulling her to her feet. “Come on, let’s go find our boy.” He said softly, guiding her to the car as he drove them to the police station.

When they arrived at the busy precinct, the man at the front desk barely acknowledged them, waving them off to wait in the seats by the door. After twenty minutes, Will was tired of waiting, pushing past the front desk and demanding to talk to anyone who would listen to him.

“I want to talk to whoever is in charge, my boy is missing and I’m not going to stop until someone bloody listens to me.”

“Please have a seat.”

“How about you have a seat, Mate.” He said, squaring up to the officer who approached him. Emma stood from her chair, rushing to his side to stop him from doing something stupid.

“Will…”

“Ma’am, I’m going to need you both to step back behind the desk.” The man warned.

“Look mister, my little boy is missing.” She held up the photo of Henry to his face, “He’s all alone, and if you don’t find someone who gives a damn about that, I’m going to stand outside this station, talking to every news outlet that will hear me, until someone pays attention to me.”

“Emma Swan.”

She spun around to see the officer she had spoken to last night and she tugged on Will’s arm to follow her in the direction of the man. “Henry’s still missing. You told me to wait 24 hours, and I know it hasn’t been that long, but the carnival is gone. And he didn’t run away.”

“Someone better tell me they are looking for Henry, or I’m marching out of here to meet with Channel 3 and tell them the Storybrooke police department doesn’t care about the safety of our young citizens.” Will barked and the officer gestured the two of them toward a corner office.

“Wait in here, I’ll be there in a minute.”

“If one more person tells me I need to wait…” Will threatened.

“Sir, I promise you, I will be right there. I just want to get my partner.” Officer Nolan stated calmly.

“Fine.” Will relented, stepping into the office as Emma followed him.

Will sat at the steel table while Emma paced the back wall. “I can’t believe this is happening.” She said anxiously. “He’s never been away from me for this long. He must be terrified.”

“I had a bad feeling about this.” Will mumbled. “I told you not to go without me last night.”

“Don’t you blame me for this. You’re the one who bailed on Henry’s birthday last night.” She yelled angrily.

“Emma, I had to work.”

“You abandoned us. And now Henry is gone.” She screamed, and Will shrank against the table, hanging his head into the palms of his hands. She knew she had gone too far. This wasn’t Will’s fault, but she had to blame someone, Henry was gone. But she knew blaming Will was wrong. This was her fault. “Will, I’m…”

The two men walked into the room, interrupting their discussion. “Miss Swan?” Officer Locksley asked as he entered.

“Yes, that’s me.” She replied anxiously.

“Have you heard from Henry since last night.”

“Would I be here if I knew where my son was?” She quipped sarcastically.

“Ma’am, we’re just trying to help.”

“Sod that, if you were trying to help you would have done so last night.” Will stated emphatically. “From where I’m sitting, it appears you’ve done bloody nothing at all.”

“You must be the boy’s father.”

“Not in the biblical sense, but yes.”

“I’m sorry?” Officer Nolan asked in a confused tone.

“The boy isn’t biologically mine, but in the ways that matter, he’s my kid.” Will said almost proudly and Emma felt a pang of guilt for attacking him earlier.

“Have you been in touch with the boy’s actual father? Perhaps he’s with him.”

Will laughed ominously. “You think he ran off with Neal? Bloody idiot of the year! Not fucking likely.”

“Sir, I can sense some tension regarding the boys father. Do you talk that way in front of the boy about his father?”

Will stood angrily. “Are you serious right now?”

“Perhaps the boy took offense, we’ve seen it happen, home life isn’t always the greatest, kids venture out to find out about the other parent that their live-in parent admonishes.”

“This is ridiculous.” Emma suddenly spoke, she was tired of hearing this crap. They apparently had no interest in helping them find Henry. They were wasting valuable time.

“Does he have contact with his father?”

“I can assure you; it would be a cold day in hell for Henry to be anywhere near Neal Cassidy. He wants nothing to do with Henry.”

“Do you know where we can find him? Perhaps you’d let us do our job and confirm he doesn’t have the boy.”

“I haven’t a clue where he’s at. Why don’t you take care of that, you’re the police. In fact, if you find him, let him know he owes me about five years of back child support.”

Emma grabbed Will by the arm and yanked him out of the station, she wasn’t going to waste a single second more on people that were doing nothing more than judging her. She needed to find Henry.

~*~

“Who’s that?” Henry asked his new friend, Alice. The short haired woman who brought them lunch always seemed nice, if not a bit anxious. Something seemed off about her, but he wasn’t sure what it was.

“That’s Tinkerbell.” Alice said and Henry burst into laughter.

“Like the fairy from Neverland?”

“Yes. She helps Pan. She’s the one who brought you here. But I’m sure you don’t remember any of that. They always make sure the kids don’t remember.”

“You’re serious about all of this. Tinkerbell, Peter Pan. I must be dreaming.”

“I wish you were. I wish we all were.” She said sadly.

“How long have you been here?”

“I lost count years ago.”

“Years?” He said wide eyed. “You’ve been here years?”

“Has to be four or five years now. But I’m not really sure. It’s hard to keep track of the days when you don’t see the light all the time.”

Henry couldn’t imagine not seeing his mom in the next day, much less years. Suddenly he felt the tears start to fall as he thought about the possibility of never seeing her again.

“Please don’t cry, Henry.” She wrapped her arm around his back, pulling him into her side.

“I miss my mom.” He cried softly.

“I know. I miss my papa, but I know one day I’ll see him again, just like I know one day you’ll see your mom again.”

“You really think so?” He sniffled, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his shirt.

“All I have is hope, you can’t let go of that Henry. The moment you give up hope, Pan wins.”

He sighed, resigning himself to that fact that he was stuck here. But, he knew his mom would find him, he remembered the story his mother told him of when he was two years old and wandered off in the department store, his mother searched everywhere until she found him, crying in the middle of a clothes rack. If anyone could find him, it was his mom. She would never give up looking for him.

~*~

Emma sat in a darkened room, the only light coming from the screen of her laptop. She had spent the last few weeks researching the Pixie Hollow Amusement Park and the information she had found was creating even more of a mystery than she could have imagined. Since the inception of Pixie Hollow seven years ago, more than thirty children had gone missing during their stay in the towns they visited.

Based on the news articles, the children were usually from families of single parents, or children on field trips to the park. Most were chalked up to runaways, and the ones that were investigated were still open cases. A few showed that the parent was under investigation for the disappearance, but so far no one had been arrested in connection to any of the missing children.

Emma had collected names of various families she had found and was spending countless hours trying to track down the parents of the missing children. First she began calling the ones she was lucky enough to get information on, but she was always met by an angry voice on the other end of the line that told her to stay out of it and hung up on her.

Emma knew she needed to face these people, plead with them to talk to her about anything they knew. Maybe if they shared their stories, details would start to add up, it might give them a chance to solve the mystery if only she could get someone to listen to her.

The next morning, she woke up with a new determination, today she was going to get something, anything that she could to find her son. He had been missing for three weeks now, and Emma was going crazy.

The only thing the police had come up with was that they had located Neal Cassidy in Tallahassee Florida, but he had no interest in discussing Henry, nor did he seem to have any information on his whereabouts.

No shit Sherlock, she had basically relayed to the officers before hanging up on them.

She looked down at the paper in front of her. Three names were written from the night before. The family members who’s addresses she was able to find through a Google search. Parents with shared experience.

Ashley Boyd – Portland, Maine

Leroy Little – Portsmouth, New Hampshire

Killian Jones – Boston, Massachusetts

“Emma, you can’t just drive all over the coast grilling grieving parents about their missing kids.”

“Tell me something better I should be doing, William!” She yelled into the phone as she slammed the door of her yellow bug shut.

“All of this started because you went off on your own, nothing good will come of this.”

“Don’t you dare blame me for this.”

He sighed, “I’m not blaming you, Emma. I just…” He paused. “There’s nothing I’m going to say that’s going to stop you, is there?”

“No, I don’t need your advice Will, I just need you to support me until I find him.”

“Emma…I will always support you, no matter what you do. Just…” He sighed again and Emma could just see him now, running a hand through his hair. “Be careful and keep me updated today. Dammit, I wish you would have waited for me to come with you.”

“I’ll be fine, I’ll text you all day. I should be home tomorrow unless I find something.”

“Please be safe, we don’t know what’s going on here. Just…just be careful with how you approach these people.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

She hung up the phone and looked at her GPS, her first stop was nearby in the town of Portland. She set the GPS and began her drive to Ashley Boyd.

It was a long drive from her home, a few towns over and she reached the small white home of Ashley Boyd. She had read about her daughter Ella, disappearing from Pixie Hollow two years ago, the police determined that Ashley’s ex husband had taken the child and left the country. The man vehemently denied any involvement in the disappearance but refused to return to the United States for fear of being arrested.

Emma climbed the short stairs to the front door and knocked on the white wooden frame. She waited until she heard yelling on the other side of the door and a small child peered through a crack.

“Hewwo, who are you?”

Emma bent down to introduce herself when a woman appeared, yanking her child up from the ground and shielding her protectively.

“Chelsey, I told you never to talk to strangers.” She looked at Emma, “Who are you, what do you want?”

“Hi Ashley, my name’s Emma Swan.”

“How do you know my name?” She asked nervously.

“I wanted to talk to you about Ella.”

“Who sent you?” She responded anxiously. “Get out of here.”

“Wait, look my son, Henry…” She held up a photo of her son. “He went missing from Pixie Hollow a month ago.”

The girl’s face crumpled before she quickly returned the mask to her face. “I’m sorry for your loss, the sooner you get over it the better. He’s never coming back.”

The woman turned and slammed the door in her face. Emma sighed, writing her number on a piece of paper, and sticking it into the door before she returned to her car.

Emma looked at her GPS on her phone. It would take her an hour to get to Portsmouth. Her next stop on her trip. Her contact was the father, Leroy. His son Stewie had gone missing four years prior during a trip to the carnival. He had been under investigation for years until he was cleared six months ago.

The entire drive she thought about Ashely’s reaction to her. Seeing her with a young child, she could tell that the woman was overprotective, nervous around strangers, distrustful almost. She had given up hope of finding her daughter. Emma never wanted to get to the point that she gave up trying to find Henry. She couldn’t imagine the dark hole that would swallow her up if she allowed herself to get to that place.

She looked up at the tiny shack on the edge of the water that belonged to Leroy Little. It was run down, almost unsafe to live in. Definitely not the place you would ever have a child.

She walked across the uneven planks that lead to the front door, the porch creaked when she stepped foot on it. She heard a noise on the other side of the door.

“Don’t know who you are, lady, but I’ve got a shot gun pointed at you, so get out o’ here before I shoot.”

Emma froze, “My name is Emma Swan, I just want to talk to you about Pixie Hollow.” She put her hands in the air.

The door creaked to a crack. “You a cop?”

“No, I’m just a mom. My son went missing too.” She said pleading with him. “I just want to talk to you.”

He opened the door, the rifle in his hands. “Ain’t nothin to talk about, sister. The kid’s gone. You can stop looking, the more you look, the harder it’s gonna be for you in a few years.”

“You can’t really believe that.”

“Ain’t got no other choice, less I want to go back to jail.”

“Where do you think Stewie is?”

He looked to the ground, then back at her face. “Don’t matter what I think. Now get outta here, I got nothing to say to you.”

He slammed the door in her face, the second time in a few hours. Emma left her number, feeling disheartened and sat in her car and cried.

She was half tempted to just go home, but she needed to finish what she started out to do today. It would take her about an hour and a half to get to Boston, perhaps this Killian Jones would talk to her.

It was harder for her to get information on his case, his daughter was one of the ones who had been missing the longest. Alice Jones had disappeared five years ago. The information she had found only said that he was a single dad, he had taken his daughter to the carnival because of her love for fairytales. She had gone missing that night and Killian was the first person of interest on the case. He spent months in prison while they investigated the girl’s disappearance, only releasing him when they found no evidence that he had anything to do with his daughters’ case. The trail went cold after that. There had been no news at all about his daughter since.

When she got to the address, she looked up at the harbor, she must have typed the wrong information. There were no houses at this location, she was at a boat yard. She got out of her car and wandered to the pier, trying to figure out why her GPS took her here.

A man was standing at the end of the pier, tying a rope to a boat that was docked there. “Excuse me.” She flagged the man down and sped up her steps to get closer to him before he disappeared into the boat. “Sir, I just need to ask you a question.”

The man noticed her, and he tensed, standing still at the end of the pier. “How can I help you, lass?”

“I’m looking for an address, but I think I wrote it down wrong because there’s no house here.”

He laughed, “You are very perceptive, love.”

She handed the paper to him, and he scratched the back of his ear. “’Fraid you aren’t looking for a house, Ma’am. But you did find what you’re looking for.” He paused and stared her down, “Care to share why you were looking for this boat?”

“A boat? I don’t understand. I’m trying to find the man at this address, Killian Jones.”

His jaw tensed. “Is that so? And what business do you have with Mr. Jones.”

“I need to talk to him about his daughter, Alice.” Before she could react the man turned feral, reaching into his back pocket and with a flick of his wrist, brandishing a knife in one hand as he took a step forward and pressed it into her side, twisting her around until her back was to his chest.

“Who sent you? Was it Mills? Just who the bloody hell are you?”

#mystery of pixie hollow #stacy's fics #emma swan #killian jones #captain swan fics #captain swan au #captain swan #captain swan modern au

[tinyboxxtink]

Build Me Up Buttercup *Part 3*

Yay I’m so happy people love this! 

SUMMARY: Summary: You’re an SVU detective, the entire squad is all driving to Hartford Connecticut in your car to interview a victim's family. ROAD TRIP!!!!

If you need to catch up:

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4

Tag List: @wanniiieeee

“...So the last time you saw her was when you dropped her at school, Mrs. Fahey?” Olivia asked the distraught mother.

You and the squad had arrived at the victim’s house later than you had anticipated, sans lunch just like Rafael had predicted. You knew you should be paying attention to the interview, but your blood sugar was tanking by the minute. You tried distracting yourself by glancing at all the photos in the living room. Frames upon frames of the victim, a young 19 year old freshman to NYU, filled the room. Almost like they had made a shrine to her while she was still living. She was clearly their entire world, and now she was missing. Suddenly, all of your phones buzzed with notifications. It was a group text from Dodd’s.

“Oh no…” Amanda whispered.

“What? What happened? Did they find my Mary?” Mrs. Fahey frantically gripped Olivia’s hand.

“Ah….Mr. and Mrs. Fahey maybe we should go somewhere more private,” She replied.

“More private than my living room? You obviously all got the same news, so you might as well tell us here,” Mr. Fahey abruptly said.

“They...did find Mary,” Olivia simply stated. The Fahey's faces lit up for a moment, but then Olivia finished her sentence.

“....Her body was floating in the Hudson.”

That was it. You didn’t know if it was the exhaustion from getting up early and driving, or the fact that you hadn’t eaten more than a stick of gum since last night, but you felt sick to your stomach and your emotions were taking over. You stood up and tried discreetly walking out into the hall from the living room. You thought for half a second to ask where the Fahey’s bathroom was, but clearly now was not the time for that. You could find it yourself; you hoped.

Meanwhile, Barba had noticed you walking out, clearly in distress. His concerned look caught Amanda’s attention, who had also seen you leave. She shrugged at Barba, causing him to ask in a whisper:

“Should I go check on her?”

“Well you clearly want to, so yeah sure,” she whispered back.

“Rollins! She’s your partner!” he hissed.

“Something tells me she’d rather see you,” Amanda smirked.

What was that? Was it obvious he liked you? Was it obvious you liked him? There was no time to dwell on that drama, he was genuinely concerned about you.

He followed your exit out into the hallway, but you had vanished. He cautiously crept down the hallway until he saw a light under a door. As he approached it, he could hear soft sobs coming from the other side.

“....Y/N?”

Your head snapped up from staring at the floor, crying into your knees next to the bathtub. Shit, you had really tried to be discreet. Why did he follow you? This was totally unprofessional, you were sure of it. You stood up and tried wiping the smeared mascara and eyeliner from your teary eyes, but damn you and your love of the smoky eye! You looked like a drowned raccoon; This was a nightmare.

“I-I’m fine!” You called through the door, praying he’d walk away and he wouldn’t have to see your impression of the girl from THE RING.

“...You sure? I heard crying…”

Well, he sure wasn’t subtle, just a “state the facts” kinda guy. You kinda loved that about him, since you were the same way. And if you were being honest with yourself, the fact that he actually came to check on you made your stomach quiver. Okay, something lower quiver.

“Yeah I….stubbed my toe on the tub,” You called through the door, making a “What the fuck was that” face.

“....Yeah I doubt that. Come on just open the door, por favor,”

Oh God. When he used spanish, your knees went weak. Even if it was just a phrase you’d hear on a Rosetta Stone.

“Damn you,” You muttered, but complied with his request. The door peeked open just the tiniest bit so he could see your Picasso painting of a face.

“Oh my god, what happened to your face?!” He asked in a louder tone that caused you to freak out and pull him into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

“Did you skip sensitivity training in law school or what?” You half laughed with a sniffle; it actually felt good. It might have been just the thing to knock back you to reality.

“I’m sorry, I’m not so good with the...subtle,” He apologized with a sheepish smile.

“Yeah I got that; it’s fine. Neither am I,” You assured him with a soft punch on the shoulder.

“Ok but seriously what happened to your face, you look like La Llorna,” He chuckled, putting his hands on your face and attempting to wipe off the layers of black lining your eyelids.

“Again, so comforting,” You rolled your eyes as he picked up a washcloth next to the sink and wet it to help the situation.

“You’re deflecting, detective,”  he raised an eyebrow as he put the washcloth to your eye. His gentle touch and the warm feel of the washcloth suddenly did actually feel extremely comforting.

“I...I’m just tired,” you lied. Well, in a way it was true.

Rafael’s eyebrow remained raised; that’s exactly what he had said earlier, instead of telling you how he really felt. He was sure you were doing it now.

“Being tired makes you burst into tears?”

“You’ve never been so tired you wanted to cry? Not even in law school?” it was your turn to raise your eyebrow.

“Alright, maybe ONCE in law school....but I waited until I was in the privacy of my own dorm,” He chuckled, you rolled your eyes.

“So…?”

“I just…..” you took a long, hard pause letting out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in. Were you seriously going to do this now? This of all times, of all people, Rafael Barba? Two hours ago you were convinced he hated you, and had probably spoken a total of two sentences in your career at SVU. But at the same time, for whatever reason, you felt completely safe with him. You took another deep breath in and finally spoke:

“It’s just...this girl; Mary. She was just a young girl, she had everything going for her! She was beautiful, smart, obviously worshipped by her parents by that shrine out there,”  you gestured towards where you both had just come from.

“And...and she makes ONE bad decision, one. One moment of wanting to be accepted by the ‘cool kids’ at school by going to a frat party, and it….” you felt a sob catch in your throat.

“...It cost her her life,” you whispered softly.

“Ay….carino, come here,” Rafael sighed and pulled you into his arms, stroking your hair. You both just stayed like that for what felt like forever, but instantaneously you both realized this had gotten insanely intimate for two co workers who barely knew each other. He dropped his arms and cleared his throat, you quickly began running your fingers through your hair as you turned to face the mirror, away from his gaze. God, please. Be more awkward.

“I didn’t want to start losing it out there in front of her parents, they literally just lost their most prized possession. This can’t be about me,” You sighed as you turned back to face him.

“It’s stupid...I’m stupid. I shouldn’t let shit like this get to me, it’s totally unprofessional I know,”

“...No it’s not, it’s fine, You’re human,” He assured you, putting a thumb under your chin making you look into his deep green eyes

“Barba? Y/N? Did you get locked in there?”

Sonny’s voice knocked you both from each other’s stare, your faces both turning red. Rafael threw the door open and let you exit in front of him.

“I got sick, Rafael held my hair,” you quickly blurted out, both men’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Oh. Well, um….Mr. Barba is quite the gentleman,” He looked at Barba trying to hide a disgusted face; thinking about vomit made him queasy. “You ok now?”

“Yeah! Fine, hungry actually,” You half smiled as they followed you to the front door where the others were waiting,

“I’m so, so sorry again Mr. and Mrs. Fahey,” Olivia held Mrs. Fahey’s hand. “You take as long as you need to before coming to the city to…”

“Identify our daughter’s body, detective. No use pussyfooting around it.” Mr. Fahey was blunt once again.

“Right,” Olivia nodded.

“I’ll take the morning off tomorrow, we’ll be by then,” he replied gruffly.

“Okay. Whenever. No Rush,” Olivia waved one last time as the door closed. You all walked silently to the car, you broke it with a deep sigh.

“....Does that ever get any easier?” You asked, looking at each face of the members of your squad.

“Honestly? If you're a good cop, no.” Fin replied.

“The day you stop caring is the day you should quit.” Sonny added.

“God I���m starving, can we please get food? And drinks?” Amanda whined.

“Well, I sure could use a drink! Or five,”  you laughed.

“That’s another thing to watch out for, rookie,” Fin paused, taking your shoulder.

“What’s that?”

“Don’t drown your problems in a bottle, That can go downhill real fast,” Fin warned.

“That’s why it’s super important to have a squad you can trust. That you can talk to,” Olivia came up and put her hand on your other shoulder.

“Well, so far so good,” you half smiled.

“Seriously guys, can we get some food? Barba’s starting to look like a rotisserie chicken right now,” Sonny licked his lips.

“Alright alright Carisi, get in the car ya five year old,” Fin punched him in the arm.

As you went to the driver’s side of the car, Rafael stopped next to you.

“Do you want me to drive?” He offered. You usually never let anyone touch your baby, but you literally felt as if you could pass out just standing there.

“Please,” You smiled, tossing him your keys.

You got in your passenger’s seat and closed your eyes, finally relaxing for the first time since you left the City.

What awaited you on the other side of your nap?

#rafael barba #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine #law and order svu #law and order special victims unit #Raul Esparza #build me up buttercup

[fleetingpieces]

Finding you

This was supposed to be a short drabble with some angst and lots of fluff, but ended up being a long one shot with lots of angst. Oops.

Trigger warning: violence, slurs and abuse. Please look after yourself :) Fuck.

Remus froze by the door, the keys still dangling in his hand. The sight in front of him was one that never promised anything good; the smell of smoke and beer was strong, making the air in the room feel heavy and loaded. He could already feel the cold sweat at the back of his neck. He considered opening the door again and just leaving the house, but then one of the men sitting in the living room glanced up, and his eyes landed right on Remus, smirking, making Remus’ muscles lock in disgust.

Remus knew the two men all too well. He knew their names, but never thought of them if he could avoid it; they brought too many bad memories. The dark-haired one -who was still looking at Remus- was the worst; the one with dirty blond curls was just a stupid pawn. Both of them were sprawled on the couch, talking loudly as if they were in their own house, their dirty boots propped on the coffee table that Remus had cleaned that very morning.

Their visits were becoming more and more frequent, and Remus didn’t miss how they always coincided with Lyall’s worst episodes. He was pretty sure they actually encouraged them for their own amusement.

His sorry excuse of a father followed his friend’s gaze then, finally noticing Remus still standing by the front door. Remus gulped as Lyall’s bleary eyes became darker.

“Where the fuck were you?”

“At work.” He tried to come out strong, but the sound of the keys clinking in his trembling hand betrayed his attempt.

Lyall stood up and took a couple of wobbly steps closer to Remus, bracing a hand on the shelf on the wall to support himself. Behind him, the man with raven black hair looked Remus up and down slowly, licking his lips. Remus felt dirty being watched like that.

“I told you I was having people over. I ordered you to come back to make dinner for us,” said Lyall, glaring at him. Remus felt his blood boil.

“Well someone has to bring money to pay the bills, since you are too busy being a lazy ass drunkard.”

He regretted the words as soon as they left his lips, it was not smart of him to talk like that right now. But he was just overwhelmed by the unfairness of it all.

“Don’t talk to me like that, you fucking brat!” Lyall yelled, swinging his arm violently over the shelf he’d been holding, and throwing everything on top of it to the floor.

Remus watched horrified as the silver frame that had his mother’s picture fell through the air, arching as if in slow motion. It landed viciously on the hardwood floor. When he heard the loud crack it made, Remus felt his heart shattering as well.

The sound sprang him into motion for the first time since stepping into this godforsaken house. He rushed over, kneeling on the floor next to the small shards scattered all over the floor. One of them dug itself into his knee, but Remus barely even noticed it. He was looking at the frame, the glass had cracked into a million pieces, forming sharp spiderwebs that spreaded over Hope’s smiling face.

“What the hell are you doing?!” Remus yelled, holding it close to his chest with both arms, protecting it like his life depended on it. Maybe it did.

He was using all of his strength to fight the tears; he would not cry in front of these men. Standing up slowly, he glared at Lyall. Remus could have sworn that he saw regret in his eyes for a moment, but it was gone the minute Remus spoke again.

“You disgust me,” he spat.

Lyall’s eyes glinted, and if Remus hadn’t been holding his mother’s picture he would have raised his arms to protect his head. As it was though, Lyall’s fist connected with his jaw, making his head snap to the side painfully. He’d punched him with the full strength of a drunken adult, which made Remus see stars dancing in his vision and stumble back, while the two guys behind them cackled loudly.

A few tears escaped Remus’ eyes then, both from the pain in his face and the even greater one in his chest. He could still remember a time when the man in front of him was actually his father. A time when they would laugh together, and Lyall would teach him to play ball. But that had all been when Hope was still in their lives. Lyall had not been the same after the accident, and in consequence, Remus had lost both of his parents the day Hope’d died.

Cold fear crept up Remus’ spine as he stared at the rage seeping out of Lyall’s eyes. He knew where this was going, how everything would turn out if he didn’t do something; and he was pretty sure that he didn’t have any more antiseptics or gauzes hidden in his room, he’d used them all the last time.

He took a careful step back.

“Where do you think you are going?”

Remus didn’t stay to give an answer, he turned around and bolted to his room. Lyall was too drunk to catch him, but Remus could hear the clumsy steps and the string of curses following behind him. As soon as he had one foot inside his bedroom, he slammed the door shut, throwing the lock on.

He took a couple of steps back, not daring to take his eyes off the door, but he still flinched when Lyall started pounding on it.

“Open the fucking door!”

His back bumped into the opposite wall, and he leaned his weight against it. He was shaking way too much to stand on his own.

Fuck fuck fuck fuck.

What should he do? There was no way he could open that door, but Lyall was pummeling it so hard that the hinges were groaning. Remus glanced around frantically, and his eyes landed on his dresser. Pushing himself off the wall, he rushed over and shoved it in front of the door, panting with the effort.

There was a pause in the rapping, leaving behind a silence that felt heavy on Remus' shoulders. His breathing was coming in short and painful bursts; the air around him didn’t seem enough to fill his lungs. He needed to calm down, but he also needed to get the fuck out of there, he didn’t believe for a second that Lyall had simply decided to let it go.

Remus took out his phone and called the only person that was on his mind at that moment. Luckily, the line rang only two times.

“Hello?”

“Sirius..”

“Re? Hey, what’s up?”

Remus took a shaky breath in, willing his voice to be steady, but he could only manage a hoarse whisper.

“Can you come pick me up?”

“Right now? I can’t, my bike broke down yesterday, remember? I didn’t have time to get it fixed yet.”

Remus did remember. James, Sirius and Remus had gone to an old dirt road that Sirius loved to go to because it meant he could use his bike at top speed and pretend he was in a Motocross race. But Sirius had also tried to teach James how to ride it, which had clearly been a terrible mistake. James had somehow managed to crash into a tree going 20 km an hour; and even though he hadn’t been injured, the handlebar had broken. Sirius had almost cried when he saw the state of his motorbike, and Remus had been teasing both him and James since.

“James’ parents took the car too, but I could take a bus to your house,” Sirius suggested, saying it as a question, but Remus shook his head even if Sirius couldn’t see him. He knew it would be too late then.

“No, no. It’s ok. Don’t worry, everything’s fine.”

His voice broke at the end, and Remus had to clamp a hand over his mouth to reign in a sob.

“What’s wrong?” Sirius asked immediately. The worry in his voice was evident, but Remus’ throat had closed up, he couldn’t reply. “Re? Remus, what’s going on?”

The pounding on the door started again, making Remus jump while he scrambled to hang up. He didn’t want Sirius listening to this.

“REMUS! I swear I will knock this fucking door down!”

Remus didn’t doubt that he meant it. He had to get out.

Grabbing a bag from his wardrobe, Remus hastily filled it with essentials, starting with the picture frame he was still holding against his chest. He wrapped it up in a t-shirt to protect the rest of his stuff from the broken glass, there was not time to get rid of it now.

All the while, the curses and fists against the door didn’t stop; Remus could tell that the other two men had joined in to try and get into his room. Right then, he was so fucking thankful for that old, heavy dresser.

The wood sounded like it was cracking when Remus had finally gathered everything he needed and threw the window open. Trying not to think about the distance to the ground, he swung both legs over the windowsill and jumped as quietly as he could.

Remus rolled on the floor a few times, a sharp pain shooting through his knee. He’d completely forgotten about the shard of glass that had undoubtedly buried itself deeper just now, but that was the least of his worries at the moment. He had to go before they noticed he was gone. He didn’t think they would go after him, but he couldn’t take any chances.

Greeting his teeth, Remus ran down the street until he turned the corner; then he slowed down a bit until he was walking at a fast pace, mentally preparing himself for the 45 minute walk to James’ house. The fresh night air felt like a blessing against his face as he tried to calm his nerves, but Remus knew he wouldn’t feel completely safe until he was at his friend’s house.

He was about halfway there when his phone rang.

“Remus!”

“James?”

“Rem, what the hell is going on? Sirius has been walking around the house like a maniac, babbling nonsense about you acting weird, and needing our help…”

“It’s fine James, don’t worry. I’m actually on my w-” Remus tried to explain, but James kept talking at full speed.

“...and then Mum and Dad came back and Sirius just stole the car keys and ran out, yelling for me to call you and tell you that-”

“Wait, what?” Remus yelled, stopping abruptly in the middle of the sidewalk.

“Yeah, he just said he was going to get you. He looked pretty worried when he left, but he didn’t explain anything.”

“No. No no no no no.”

Remus panicked. If Sirius went to his house, where Lyall and his friends were surely mad that Remus had ran away… He shuddered to think what they would do. And Sirius absolutely lacked common sense and self preservation, he was too reckless.

“Remus? Remus please, talk to me.”

“I need to call him. He can’t go there, I need to-”

“I tried, but the prat left his phone. He just ran off as soon as my parents came in.”

Remus felt as if his world was starting to collapse. He couldn’t stand the idea of Sirius getting hurt because of him. He couldn’t stand the idea of Sirius getting hurt, period. He looked around frantically, as if he would find something that could help him in the deserted street.

“How long ago did he leave?” he asked James. He could hear the desperation in his own voice, and the confusion in James’.

“Just a few minutes, but-”

Remus hung up. He turned around and sprinted as fast as he could, back to the hell house. He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket, but he couldn’t stop to explain everything to James. The only thing on his mind was Sirius.

Images of everything that Remus had been going through at home came rushing in, but with Sirius’ face instead of his, bloody and broken. The mere mental image caused him so much pain and rage, it was unbearable.

Sirius was the most important person in his life, the thought of losing him scared the shit out of Remus. He was like the sunshine in Remus’ longest night. He’d picked up Remus’ pieces when his Mum’s death had torn him apart, and stayed by his side when Lyall started spiralling down. He always knew where to find Remus and how to bring him into the light.

Remus had never told any of his friends what was going on at home, he couldn’t stand the idea of them looking at him with pity, knowing he was a coward that couldn’t stand up for himself. Especially not Sirius. Sirius who was all courage, smiles and warm feelings.

Feelings, Remus groaned internally.

He’d been trying to get rid of his feelings for Sirius for months now, but they only seemed to be getting stronger. Remus had been terrified when he’d realized he was in love with his best friend, he’d had no idea what to do. He still didn’t. Telling his friends that he was gay would have been a good start, but after Hope had passed Remus had lost the nerve to do it. He couldn’t tell Sirius, he couldn’t risk losing him.

His lungs were burning by the time he reached his house, but the sight of the Potter’s car parked hastily with the front wheel on top of the curb gave him a boost of energy.

The front door was open, the yelling reaching Remus’ ears and sending another pang of fear through him.

“Where’s Remus?!”

As Remus stepped in, what he saw inside froze him in place for a moment, just like a mere hour earlier. But the sight in front of him right now was scarier in a very different way.

The man with the dirty blond hair was sprawled on the floor, unconscious. The other man was just standing there, cracking his knuckles and laughing perversely at the two men standing in the middle of the room. Lyall seemed to be out of it, a beer bottle clutched in his hand and his eyes full of hate.

And Sirius.

Sirius was shorter than Lyall, but he was standing just a few inches from him nonetheless, yelling in his face. His hair was in a messy bun, strands falling in his face, and Remus gasped when he saw the split lip, blood trickling down Sirius’ chin. Even in this shitty situation and with everything going on around him, Remus thought that he was beautiful.

Then he cursed himself, focusing again.

“Sirius!”

The three men went quiet as they turned around, the tension in the room shifting on its edge to land on Remus, almost crushing him. He could feel their gazes and everything they carried, the hate, the anger, the lasciviousness. Remus blocked all of those, focusing solely on Sirius, making sure he was ok.

Remus was not ready for Sirius’ reaction when the boy took a good look at him though. Remus could only imagine what he looked like: sweaty, with blood on his jeans and maybe a swollen face. He watched as Sirius’ scowl got deeper and he spun around, shoving Lyall hard.

“What the fuck did you do to him?!”

Lyall staggered back but managed to stay up.

“It has nothing to do with you!”

Remus, who was already used to it, saw it coming before Sirius did. As Lyall threw his arm back, Remus’ feet moved on their own, and before he realized it he was standing between the two of them, looking right at Lyall’s surprised eyes as his fist connected with the side of Remus’ head.

The force of the impact threw him back, making him fall into Sirius’ arms. The warmth of the other boy’s hands against his sides seeped through his clothes, warming him up to the very core, and Remus glanced up. There was so much concern in Sirius’ eyes that it disarmed him; he was lost in the stormy grey, forgetting about everything else for a second. Remus desperately wanted to place a hand on Sirius’ cheek to reassure him, or maybe kiss his lip better…

“I know what you are!” Lyall’s screaming brought Remus back to the cold, hard reality. “You try to hide it, but everyone knows you’re a damned faggot! It’s your own fault if you got hit, protecting your nancy boyfriend like that!”

Remus paled, his thoughts turning cold as he felt Sirius’ whole body tense up behind him.

No. Please, no. Not now.

“He’s not my boyfriend, leave him out of this,” Remus said, trying to sound calm, but his voice was shaking. What was Sirius thinking? Remus didn’t have the courage to turn around and see, so he stepped out of his grasp instead.

The dark-haired man started laughing loudly then. Remus had almost forgotten he was even there, but his head snapped to him when he felt an icy hand close around his wrist, tugging him forward harshly.

“So it’s true? I’ve been wondering for a while, you know; thought I could teach you a thing or two,” Rick said, lust filling his voice. No, no, don’t think about his name. It doesn’t matter, he’s inconsequential, Remus tried telling himself.

The man pulled him closer, pressing his body against Remus’ back, inhaling the scent from his hair. One of the hands was still holding his wrist with bruising strength, but when the other slipped under his t-shirt, Remus felt paralyzed.

“What are you doing?” Lyall asked. He looked slightly less drunk now, but was stunned in place, his eyes wide. Remus looked up at him pleadingly.

“Nothing, we are just having some fun, right boy?” the man said in a mocking tone.

Lyall didn’t move and Remus wanted to scream at him to do something. Hell, he was screaming at his own body to do something, but the connection between his brain and his extremities was numb, like the rest of him.

“Let go of him,” a quiet voice said. Remus fixed his eyes on the source of it, and was met with pure, concentrated rage. He’d never seen such fury in Sirius’ eyes, and even the dark-haired man took a step back.

“You’ll stay out of it if you know what’s good for you, kid. Unless you want to take his place?”

The words hung in the air as they made their way into Remus’ brain, and once they sunk in, everything in Remus’ vision turned red. He was not going to let that asshole touch so much as a hair on Sirius's head. He brought his elbow up, digging it deep into the man’s stomach, who doubled over. Sirius rushed forward then and pushed the man with his shoulder, making him stumble backwards and crash into the small table.

Not wasting any time, Sirius grabbed Remus by the hand and tugged him gently but hurriedly to the door, making a quick exit before the man could recover. He only stopped for a second next to the still stunned form of Lyall, looking at him with revulsion.

“Hope would be ashamed of you,” he spat with a venomous glare. As Sirius dragged him outside, Remus looked back and was pretty sure he could see Lyall’s face crumble before he covered it with his hands.

Sirius didn’t stop until they were next to the car. He opened the passenger door for Remus and carefully helped him climb in, even buckling the seatbelt for him. Remus let his friend handle him; he felt like his mind was miles away, the events of the night had not settled in yet, but they were approaching him like an oncoming train.

They rode in silence. Sirius was gripping the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white, and he kept stealing glances at Remus, but none of them said a word.

James, who'd been pacing by the front door, rushed down the steps when he saw them approaching through the long driveway to the estate. They weren't even completely out of the car before James threw his arms around Remus' neck.

"Oh god, oh thank fucking god. Are you guys ok?" 

He examined Remus' appearance, scowling at what he saw. When Sirius joined them near the entrance, Remus tried his best not to look him in the eye, which made James glance between the two of them, confused.

"My mum is going crazy. She's going to bombard you with questions as soon as you step in," he said, trying to get a grasp on the situation himself.

Remus shook his head quickly.

"Please, I don't want to talk about it. Not right now," he whispered.

James was about to argue, but a look from Sirius shut him up, so he nodded instead.

"Ok. Ok, I'll go talk to them," he said, and without any warning, he lunged forward again, hugging Remus tightly. "I'm so glad you're ok. You scared the living daylights out of me." 

It took Remus two seconds to figure out how to move his body again so he could hug James back just as tight. What had he done to deserve friends like this?

James squeezed him one last time before turning around and going into the house, leaving Remus and Sirius alone. Silence fell, broken only by the chirping of the crickets in the big garden that surrounded the house from all sides, and the faint sound of the sea a few miles away. 

When Sirius extended a hand towards him, Remus couldn't help but flinch back. He felt bad instantly as he finally looked up at Sirius, surprised by his own reaction, and saw how Sirius stopped his hand mid-air with a pained expression on his face.

Remus wanted to explain, but what could he say? That even though his brain felt muddled, he couldn’t stop thinking about every time Lyall and his friends had beaten him up?

He didn’t need to say anything though, ‘cause Sirius’ face softened like he understood exactly what Remus was thinking. Not taking his eyes away from Remus’, Sirius extended his hand again, deliberately slow, and held it between them as an offering. He was giving Remus a choice. He didn’t move a muscle until Remus tentatively laced their fingers together, and then Sirius smiled softly, tugging at his hand gently to lead him inside.

Sirius led him up to the first floor, ignoring the hushed voices coming from the kitchen, which Remus was grateful for. He didn’t have the strength to face Mrs and Mr Potter right now.

He didn’t realize Sirius was not taking him to the guest room until he dragged Remus into his own bedroom, closing the door behind them.

As Sirius finally let go of his hand to drop Remus’ bag on the bed, and Remus realized that he was actually there, that he was safe, the numbness in his body receded and the weight of everything crashed into him, as if the train had finally run him over. The events of the night, the months of abuse, the fact that Sirius of all people had seen it, that Sirius knew. Oh God, Sirius knew the truth, he knew everything! 

It was impossible for Remus to keep himself together any longer.

He slumped on the floor with his back against the bed, hugging his legs. When it became obvious that he would not be able to reign in the tears, he buried his face in his knees, as the sobs quietly shook him. He was sure Sirius would hate him now, and there was no way that Remus could recover from that.

Just a little longer, he thought, for only a few minutes more he wanted to pretend like none of this had happened and that he could have his friends for a bit more. That he could survive this. He hugged himself tighter, trying to keep his pieces together.

“Remus.”

Remus tensed up, but didn’t move. Not yet, please, not yet. I’m not ready.

Warm hands rested lightly on his wrists, kindly prying his arms apart to undo his curled up position.

“Re, look at me,” Sirius whispered.

Reluctantly, Remus slowly raised his head. 

“How long has this been going on?” he asked in a quiet but steely voice. Remus wasn’t sure anymore if the anger was directed at him or not, he had never seen Sirius like this. He turned his head to the side, letting his gaze fall on the floor.

“A while,” he replied quietly.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Sirius almost yelled, and the pain in his voice startled Remus into looking at him again.

“I..I didn’t want you to pity me. I didn’t want you to see that side of me,” he said with furrowed eyebrows.

“Remus I’m your best friend! I would have helped you!”

“And what could you have done, Sirius? I have nowhere to go!” Remus replied in the same heated tone. Anxiety gripped him again as he understood that he eventually would have to go back there, to that nightmare. Standing up, he started pacing up and down the room, the movement keeping him sane and functioning. “He’s gonna kill me when I go back,” Remus muttered more to himself than anything else.

“You are not going back there,” Sirius said in a hard voice, standing up as well. Remus stopped his pacing to huff a humorless laugh, staring at his feet.

“It’s not like I have a choice, Sirius. At some point, I’m gonna have to-”

“No. I don’t give a flying fuck about what you think you have to do. You are not going back to that house. And if you think Effie or any of us will let you anywhere near that man, then you are sorely mistaken. You’ll be staying here with us.”

Remus knew Mrs Potter cared for him and treated him just like she did Sirius, but there was no way he could impose on her like that. He didn’t feel like arguing about that now though, so he just stayed quiet. Both of them stood there, breathing heavily, Sirius with clenched fists and not taking his eyes off of him, while Remus wrung his hands nervously, still gazing at his feet.

It was a few long minutes before Sirius broke the silence again.

“Is it true?”

Remus knew instantly what Sirius was talking about, but he thought if he pretended not to hear, perhaps Sirius would drop it. He bit his lip, completely missing the way Sirius looked down at his mouth before going back up.

“What that prick said...is it true?” Sirius pressed.

When he didn’t answer again, the sound of steps filled the room before long fingers slipped under Remus’ chin with a care that he had never received before, lifting his head up until gold eyes were locked with silver ones.

Sirius searched his eyes, looking into his very soul, waiting for Remus to say something. Remus knew there was no point avoiding it, Sirius knew him far too well, and it was nearly impossible for Remus to deny him anything when he was staring at him with such an expectant look. He was so stupid when it came to Sirius.

“Yes,” Remus finally replied in a tiny whisper. Sirius’ fingers tensed the slightest bit, which threw Remus into a fit of nervous verbiage. Swallowing over the lump in his throat, he kept talking fast, “I understand if you feel uncomfortable or d-disgusted with me. Take your time, I...I just-”

“Remus, just shut up,” the tenderness in Sirius’ voice contrasted so much with his harsh words, that it left Remus feeling confused. With the rough fingertips still burning under his chin, Remus tilted his head to the side, trying to understand, but he couldn’t figure out the emotion swimming behind the molten silver of Sirius’ eyes.

Sirius hesitated, but then his hand slowly brushed Remus’ face, going up his jaw, until it was cupping his cheek.

“For a smart guy, you can be pretty clueless, you know?” Sirius said with a half smile.

“I...I’m not sure I follow,” Remus said with slightly wide eyes.

Sirius laughed quietly, shaking his head with fondness. He bent down to press their foreheads together, and Remus felt his breath hitch in his throat.

“How could I ever feel disgusted by you? Are you really that blind?”

Remus pulled away an inch with raised eyebrows. He was a bit dense regarding people’s feelings towards him, he knew that much as he always assumed the worst, but the way Sirius was acting...

“You...Are you saying that..?” Remus left the question unfinished; he wasn’t sure about anything anymore. Sirius was giving him a small, shy smile. Sirius Black, shy. Remus thought for sure that he must have been imagining things.

Brushing one of Remus’ curls behind his ear, Sirius struggled for a bit to find the words.

“Re, for the longest time I’ve been holding back. I...I wanted to tell you how I felt, but you were going through so much with your Mum, I just felt like I would be taking advantage when you weren’t doing so great. I didn’t want to add any more pressure into your life, I wanted to wait for the perfect time.”

He laughed bitterly.

“I know I’m not doing much better right now, but I just...I can’t let you sit there thinking that I would hate you for this Re, I...I fucking love you.”

Remus was speechless. All this time, he’d thought he was just a fool for falling for Sirius, for allowing himself to be so close to him when it hurt knowing he could never have him. Remus glanced down when he felt cool fingers lacing themselves with his, and then up to the boy in front of him.

There was so much love pouring out of Sirius that Remus thought he must have definitely been blind not to notice before.

Sirius stared into his eyes, silently asking a question. Remus nodded minutely, and not even a second later he felt soft lips brushing against his, slow and deep.

Remus' hands tangled into soft black locks, shivering at the idea that he was finally allowed to do it after spending so long wishing for it. Sirius’ own set to explore Remus’ body with a hunger that spoke volumes of Sirius’ restraint, caressing Remus back before settling on his hips.

When they broke apart, their breathing agitated, Remus hid his face in the crook of Sirius’ neck, dizzy with the feelings rushing through his body.

“Thank you for coming for me,” he mumbled against Sirius’ skin, eliciting a shiver from the other boy.

Sirius smiled softly, dropping kisses to Remus’ hair and temple. He slid his hands to the small of his back, bringing Remus closer to his chest.

“I will always find you, Moons.”

#wolfstar #oneshot #writing #muggle au #Remus Lupin #siriusxremus #sirius black #marauders #fanfic

[juniorgman187]

Serpent of Eden (Part 1 - Reid Series)

Maybe he stole her innocence. Maybe she never had any . . .

Summary: Reader’s one night stand with Spencer turns into a year-long semester. (yes, for all you PLL fans, this is largely based off of Ezra and Aria don’t @ me)

A/N: Strongly suggest listening to “From Eden” by Hozier while reading 😌 Couple: Fem!Reader x Professer Spencer Reid  Category: Fluff, Angst, Series Content Warning: allusions to teacher/student relationship, age-gap, allusions to penetrative, public sex Word Count: 3k

BIG BIG BIG THANK YOU TO @andiebeaword​ @inkstainedwritergirl​ @thelovelyrose​ and @imagining-in-the-margins​ for their help with the title!! 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

Babe

There's something tragic about you

I’d been absentmindedly humming the song as soon as I heard the opening tune, giving the song more attention than the impatient bartender in front of me who had to wave her hand in my face to bring me back to earth. 

“Hello?” She set her weight on one hip, clearly annoyed with me. “What do you want to drink?”

“Oh, right, sorry. Just a water please.” 

Mild humiliation manifested on my face, earning the concern of the stranger beside me. 

“You okay down there?”

I laughed softly to mask my shame. “I’m a bit jet-lagged. I just got back from Europe.”

I hadn’t noticed him sitting there before, probably because I practically slept-walked into this place by happenstance, but once I answered him, my eyes naturally drifted in his direction. Consequently, I couldn’t take my eyes off him. 

Something so magic about you

Don't you agree?

He was charming in the most peculiar way. His hair was a mess of curls, that I positively adored for a reason I couldn’t quite figure out; a stark contrast to his clean suit that targeted my insatiable desire for sharply dressed men. 

“Where in Europe?” He asked with genuine curiosity, sipping from a mug with steam floating out of it. 

“Iceland.”

He raised his eyebrows in earnest surprise. “I heard it’s beautiful there.” 

“It really is. The waterfall we visited was insane. Here, lemme show you a picture,” Pulling out my phone, I leaned over the seat between us to show him a photo I’d taken of the waterfall, not even realizing how close he was until I smelled his cologne. It was such a unique scent that I knew I could only ever associate it with him, even if I were to never smell it again.

There's something lonesome about you

Something so wholesome about you

Get closer to me

I brushed aside the nervousness I felt from his close proximity and slid back into my rightful spot a seat away. “You should definitely go if you’re considering it. I’m planning on going back this summer.” 

“Yeah, I’m, um, I’m definitely considering it.” He grinned, displaying a pair of dimples that made me weak. I let myself wonder if I was the reason he was considering going. 

Unconsciously, I turned my bar seat fully towards him, showing that he had my undivided attention, and asked, “So do you go to Hollis?” Referring to the college just nearby that I attended. 

“No, no. I graduated ages ago, but um, I work at Quantico.” 

“Quantico? Like FBI Quantico?”

“That’s right. I’m, uh, I’m a profiler for the Behavioral Analysis Unit. We specialize -”

“In building profiles for unidentified criminals. No, yeah, I totally know what you do! At the law firm I work at, the prosecutors use profiles all the time. That’s so cool that you do that.” 

He wasn’t even mad that I’d interrupted him, no, he was glad. He smiled, looking almost proud of me. 

No tired sigh, no rolling eyes

No irony

“So you work at a law firm?” His mouth hidden behind the rim of his cup. 

Doing my best not to look at the way he licked the taste of coffee from his lips, I had to consciously keep my eyes steady on his as I answered. “Yeah, I do. There are like generations and generations of lawyers in my family, so I’m just continuing that tradition, I guess.” 

The conversation paused for a moment again, while his stare lingering on me too long for comfort that I had to look away. 

No "Who cares?", no vacant stare

No time for me

“I love this song.” I muttered under my breath, simply bringing it up to find a reprieve from his overwhelming gaze. From my peripheral, I caught him smirking, still staring.

“From Eden. B-32.”

Him simply knowing the jukebox number for the song felt like a sign.

Honey, you're familiar, like my mirror years ago

Idealism sits in prison, chivalry fell on his sword

“Hozier wrote it in a tongue-in-cheek way from the point of view of the devil looking at something innocent and seeing it as a missing part. The song tries to woo a woman while admitting that the relationship would be deeply flawed.” He informed me.

“Wow, that’s beautiful. Almost makes me want a forbidden kind of love.” 

Oh, had I only known the irony of my sentiment.

“He’s so good with his prose and poetry. It’s actually what inspired me to go to Iceland. I thought a change of scenery might be good for writing. Not much here in Virginia that’s quite like the beauty of Iceland,” I rambled, catching myself and consciously slowing down the rate of my words. “But um, I don’t write anything really good, just stuff that’s for me mostly.”

“I’m impressed.” 

“Why?”

With the utmost nonchalance, he stood from his chair, sliding his drink down the bar with him as he took the empty seat closest to me. I tried not to let my vision drift from his face to his actions, in the same way that he kept his gaze firm on him while he spoke. 

“Well, I tried writing, but I didn’t get very far. You’re lucky. If you’re writing for yourself, it’s true passion,” He paused to glance at his empty glass, like he was debilitating whether or not to say this next part. “Maybe you’d let me read some of it?”

"Yeah. Sure. If you really want to.” 

“Yeah, I’d love to,” He chuckled. “You’re smart, you’re well-traveled - great taste in music. I’d like to know more about you.” 

Innocence died screaming; honey, ask me, I should know

I slithered here from Eden just to sit outside your door

Maybe the flattery got to my head, but I couldn’t help the sudden surge of confidence bursting through my veins. 

“I’d like to know more about you, too.” I confessed. 

Needless to say, we didn’t waste another second getting to know each other. 

Well, as much as you can get to know someone after you fuck them in the bathroom of a bar. 

Babe

There's something wretched about this

Something so precious about this

Where to begin?

. . . 

“And where have you been, young lady?” Holly asked, acting more like my mother than my roommate upon my return to the dorm. 

“The Hollis Bar and Grill.” 

“Doing what exactly?” 

I would be remiss not to take up the opportunity for witty banter. 

“Spencer.” 

She rose from her seat at an ungodly speed to chase me down and force me to explain everything. 

“Who is he?”

“Some guy.” I blankly answered, not finding it in my jet-lagged heart to recount every last detail. 

“So is it just Spencer? No last name?” 

“Oh, I’m sorry, do you usually ask your one night stands for their last name?” I shot her an accusatory stare. 

“Oh, is that what we’re calling this? A one night stand?” 

My agreeing nod was interrupted with the ear-splitting squeal of joy that erupted from Holly. 

“You had your first one-night stand!”

“Say it any louder, would you?” 

“Sorry, I’m just so proud of you! My baby’s growing up.” Pretending to wipe tears from her eyes, Holly pulled me in for a hug. The only way I could manage to get out of it was if I promised to tell her every little thing in the morning when I was well-rested, and fingers crossed, less jet-lagged. 

As promised, in the morning, I revealed to Holly all the details of the night before, including, but not limited to our thought-provoking discourse, his appearance, and his performance.

“At the end, he told me, ‘I will never forget you.’” I gushed to Holly. 

And he definitely meant it, because after tomorrow, he most certainly would not. 

. . . 

The first day back from Spring Break is typically the hottest day of the year, and today was no exception. It was breaching the three-digit-degree mark, which is how you know it’s hot, but we were still forced to endure the cruel and unusual punishment of wearing a uniform anyway. One that consisted of a white button-up, a plaid pleated skirt, and some type of University cardigan over it. 

Usually, this didn’t pose a problem, and I would comply, but we’d recently been hit by an ongoing heatwave that didn’t look like it was stopping anytime soon. 

Even as I got ready in the morning, with my windows shut and the air conditioning blasting, I was sweating like a pig. I had a paranoid feeling that my makeup would melt and run down my face by the end of the day, so I sat in front of the fan to cool myself off. I struggled with my hair - not that I didn’t normally struggle to style my hair every day because my kinky curls weren’t exactly manageable. But I had no interest in straightening it because I knew the humidity would just return it to its naturally curly state anyway, so I settled for letting it run wild. I’d probably work up a sweat trying to style it at all, honestly. 

As I packed the last of my things into my backpack, I finally slipped on my Uni cardigan over the rest of my uniform to complete it. I’d been delaying this part for the better part of an hour because I knew exactly what would happen the second I put it on. And just as I anticipated - I felt faint. My cheeks grew pink the minute I stepped out of my dorm; exposing myself to the sun that was visibly beating down on everyone in the courtyard. 

“Y/N!” 

Behind me was Christina, who was jogging to catch up with me. To be considerate, I stopped walking, giving me the opportunity to look at her wholly. She was only wearing the skirt and the button up, with her cardigan wrapped around her waist. 

“Are you allowed to wear your cardigan like that?” I asked after she finally caught up to me. 

“No, but I’m going to do it anyway. Stick it to the man!” She threw up her fist into the air with a proud grin plastered on her face.

Ah, yes - stick it to the man. One of Christina’s favorite five-word mantras that she stuck by. The other being - we do what we want. 

But, see, it was easy for her to say that because she never once faced repercussions for her actions. Take her hemmed skirt, for example. She shortened it by an inch - not allowed, by the way - but here she was, donning her hemmed skirt and receiving no punishment for it, not even earning a second glance from the campus security we just passed. 

How she managed to get away with as much as she did was beyond me. The only way I could describe it was that she had this magical gift of invincibility - she could never get in trouble for breaking the rules, completely untouchable. But for me, I knew the second I acted out, I’d be sitting in front of the whole school board, begging them not to expel me. My luck was just that bad.

“You don’t always have to do what they say, you know?” Her words were tempting fate.

“Yes, I do.”

“Why do you always have to be such a goody-two-shoes? Why can’t you just let loose? You’ll have so much more fun.”

“But that’s just it - I’m not here to have fun, Christina! I can’t afford to mess around every day and break the rules. I’m not like you, okay? I actually had to work to get here.” My voice had taken on much more anger than the situation warranted, which I instantly regretted. 

Her head cocked to the side in shock. “You don’t think I had to work hard?” Christina’s voice now matched my previous level of rage.

“I’m sor-”

“It’s fine. I’ll see you after class.” 

Great. 

I watched in lamentation as she briskly walked away from me, clearly upset. 

As if today wasn’t bad enough. 

Though I knew she wanted me to chase after her and beg for her forgiveness, I had much more important things to attend to. Plus, I trusted her word - she’d see me after class and I could apologize after then, but as for right now, I was going to keep my priorities in order. 

As per usual, I was the first to arrive, and the following class, I was, too, and so on and so forth. Christina would’ve rolled her eyes at my timeliness, but I preferred being early than being late.

By lunch time, I hadn’t seen Christina since our minor altercation in the morning, but to my delight, when I reached our lunch spot in the grass, she was right there waiting for me, just like she always did. 

“Hey, Chris. About earlier -”

“No need to apologize. I shouldn’t have pushed you to break the rules. Come sit.” She patted a spot on the grass under the shady tree for me to sit on, but not even the voluminous leaves above could mask us from the sun. 

It was noon now, probably the peak of heat, and I felt like I was being baked alive. Even the wind that passed through was a hot breeze, merely amplifying the humidity. 

And perhaps I was compensating because I had a suspicion that Christina hadn’t truly forgiven me, but I started to peel my sweater off my body with the guise that I was doing it because I was burning up, and not because I was trying to get back on her good side.

She was speechless at first, but then she hit me with a cheerful, “Yeah!” While she clapped in approval, I took off my cardigan and unbuttoned the top few buttons. 

I was almost enjoying myself and how rebellious I was being. It was very unlike me, but it felt nice not to care so much, but then I heard a voice too distinct to misplace. 

“Ms. Y/L/N!” 

Mine and Christina’s head both whipped around hastily to see Mrs. Whitman, who looked furious. 

“That is against the dress code. You will report to room R-412 after school for detention. Do not be late.” 

Lest I forget to mention, Christina was breaking the dress code, too, but again - her power of invincibility protected her - a power which I did not possess.

My jaw hung low in shock. 

“Oh my god,” I turned to Christina, with my hand covering my mouth. 

“I am so sorry, Y/N. I didn’t mean to get you in trouble.”

I shot up from the grass, replacing my cardigan where it should be on my shoulders and buttoning the top few buttons of my shirt to regain some dignity. 

“Where are you going?” Christina called out after I abandoned her at the table.

I didn’t answer, out of pure rage, not that it was Christina’s fault, but that I’d actually foolishly broken the rules - and enjoyed it. 

The rest of the day was spoiled after that thanks to the impending doom of heading straight to detention after school was over. 

Christina texted and called repeatedly to apologize, but it would be no use. I wasn’t necessarily mad at her, although it wouldn’t have been completely untrue to say that I was, but I was madder at the situation. 

My humiliation was reinforced when after the final bell rang, I had to go against the grain of students, who were desperately filing out of the classes to return to their dorms, while I was headed for yet another “class.” I normally would’ve been one of those students, briskly shuffling out of a classroom with a million other people, trying to cram through a tiny door to leave, but now I was an outlaw, and I wasn’t sure that I liked it.

I found the room in no time, having studied the campus map until I knew it as well as the back of my hand. I even recognized the room number from when I asked my counselor for an application to audit Dr. Reid’s Criminology class, but I was declined acceptance, giving me all the more reason to hesitate to enter. I clutched onto the doorknob and lingered in the doorway, trying to find the nerve to walk in and commence my punishment. 

With one exasperated exhale, I swung the door open and marched in with my head down and my tail between my legs. Taking a cursory glance, I didn’t see a teacher anywhere.

“Hello? Dr. Reid?”

My small voice ricocheted off the high ceilings and reverberated back to me, instilling me with the chills of being alone in this large, empty classroom. 

I hadn’t yet taken a seat, mainly in case I needed to run for my life, I’d just need to pick up my feet instead of get up from a seat, but more so because I expected someone to be in here to instruct me on where to sit. I was more surprised that it was just me here and not anyone else, which made me reflect even harder on the idea that maybe I was the only one here because everyone else in this school had more discipline than me. But I also had to consider that the kids that were troublesome enough to land themselves in detention probably had no intention of suddenly abiding by the rules and showing up to detainment as they should. 

Out of nowhere, I heard the clunk and thump of shuffling footsteps. 

"Dr. Reid?”

From the stage I saw a figure emerge, briskly walking with a satchel crossed over their body and a coffee cup raised to their lips. 

Those lips. 

I’ve seen them before. 

Flashbacks of the night before began replaying in my head at a million miles per hour. 

“You okay down there?”

“Iceland.” 

“Quantico? Like FBI Quantico?”

“B-32.”

“I’m impressed.”

“Maybe you’d let me read some of it?”

“I’d like to know more about you.”

I felt the ground sway beneath me when the source of his familiarity became glaringly apparent. 

We simply stood there, gaping at each other like we couldn’t believe this was actually happening, totally, and completely speechless. 

“Spencer?” 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 

PART 2 HERE!

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#Criminal Minds #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic