#i'm cherishing everything you all say to me/draw for me i swear- if i could dump all my love onto everyone i would >:'Dc | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cookiedoughuwu · 1 year

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🕙𝟷𝟶,𝟶𝟶𝟶 ʜᴏᴜʀᴤ-ᴊᴜɴɢᴋᴏᴏᴋ ᴊɪᴋᴏᴏᴋ🕙

Time really does fly by.

From the start, my love for you was never a lie.

It sucked when all I got was rejection but that's okay because that's all I predicted.

Every time you pushed me away, I was left craving and missing something.

Yet it made sense due to your age, you were bound to act the way you did.

Men this, Men that what the heck is 'men'?

Just because you're a man, you shouldn't be emotional-seeing stuff like that makes me flip the lid!

For years I was chasing after something I'd never get!

I was chasing after you for some reason and looking back-all I can see is red!

Like a flower left in the shade-never able to bloom, it's so close to the light but it never could move!

My seed was planted in such a bad place!

Yet seeing you still makes my heart race!

Back then I couldn't grow bloom or expand my love for you.

No matter how hard I tried I was still stuck-isn't that true?

I feel like I've spent 10,000 hours trying to get to you!

I've mastered the art of running but I've never made it to the finish line!

I'm always so close but it gets further away, like the shadows moving along with the sun in the day.

I want you, I need you, I'm going to love you!

I've stopped running for you and the finish line looks closer.

Now your suddenly running towards me.

I swear I'm not blind-I mean I know I can see!

Look at you! You're actually chasing after me!

I can't believe it! I was left in the dark with no way out but you found me and it was an instant spark!

I was like a bleeding heart- full of heartbreak but with you, I was growing in the dark!

I started to bloom and the light shined on me and you!

You're my sun and moon-beaming with the love I thought you never had for me!

But I was wrong-blinded by the constant swirl of darkness!

Yet you showed me the way and I saw that beautiful face I've always missed.

I'm so glad you decided to stop fighting yourself, to get over that fear of being judged.

I can finally hold you without any fear of our reputation being smudged.

I'm glad you choose to show more of your true self these days.

I mean how else would you express yourself in so many different ways?

Tattoos all over your arm, purple hair, brutally honest music, and talking more in interviews!

You've really come a long way, didn't you?

You went from a seed to a sprout and a beautiful grown flower!

A matured reliable adult with lots of power!

An imperfectly perfect human being that was able to use that power with longevity like grace!

You're truly the red rose in my bouquet when you dance so sensually and move your hips in that way!

Your voice.

Your body.

Your face.

Your eyes.

They all allure me to this ravishing, desirable, sensual, sensational Rose.

The petals represent all your tempting muscles and curves that you worked so hard for.

A sculpture, masterpiece, painting, snack, entrée, buffet, and bouquet.

These are all the scrumptious things that you are to me sexually.

A delicious enticing thanksgiving dinner.

A delightful painting that should be admired and cherished.

A bouquet of red Roses that should be loved and cared for.

A sculpture of imperfection that should be behind a glass wall to be appreciated more.

You're also the red Amaryllis flower in my bouquet when you smile and get flustered in any way!

The petals and stem show all the skills and talent you have and how you've come all this way!

It's honestly mind-blowing with how much work you put into literally everything!

You're the jack of all trades and a master of all, what else in BTS can you not bring?!

You can dance, sing, rap, draw, game, film, box, and even do Taekwondo!

Your personality is golden and shining bright like the stars at night!

But between you and me-I'd say your personality is more like a Diamond!

No matter how blissful, beautiful and ethereal you look.

You could be broken still, and I want to protect you, heal you, love you, and adore you for the diamond Hyung that you are!

It's honestly amazing to see how you've come so far!

Your constant determination to make it is absolutely inspirational!

If you were water, I'd want it to never stop raining.

If you were a flower, I'd never want you to stop growing.

If you were nature I'd never want you to stop flourishing.

Since you're a human...I'd never want to stop loving you.

I know you've shown me some love back but there's something that it lacks!

I can't hold back anymore, I'm tired of fighting something I was destined for.

If it wasn't obvious before, or in this poem then I'll just say it more.

I'll say it clearly and make it straight to the point probably like I did earlier.

I love you, Jeon Jungkook!

I really do!

If I could love you more than I would!

Infinity and beyond is my love for you!

I just hope that this whole confession could mean something to you.

Your bunny smile.

Your laugh.

Your talents and skills.

Your hands, body, eyes, lips, nose, thighs-everything!

I love everything about you!

You're my bouquet of flowers that I cherish and water each day!

You're my water of rain that helps me take care of the seeds I plant!

You're my nature of thriving animals, grass, and trees that give me the oxygen to breathe whenever I pant.

You are my universe that I praise and show gratitude for existing all this time.

Why? Because you deserve all the love in every galaxy!

There truly isn't enough love past infinity to express the amount of admiration and praise I want to express to you.

So please, if you do love me back.

Stop fighting that cupid's arrow through your heart.

Stop thinking that all of this was just a coincidence.

Stop lying to yourself and deceiving the truth!

Stop buying into all the 'negativity' that I know you'll get through!

I love you Jeon Jungkook.

If you don't love me back then at least allow me to admire that euphoric view.

If you do then please, just let me love you for no one else but the true you.

I'd spend ten thousand hours and ten thousand more~

Oh, if that's what it takes to learn that sweetheart of yours~

And I might never get there, but I'm gonna try~

If it's ten thousand hours or the rest of my life~

I'm gonna love you (Ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh)~

Yeah~

And I~

(Do you love the rain, does it make you dance?)~

I'm gonna love you (I'm gonna love you)~

And I~

I'm gonna love you~

#gay #Jikook #Jimin #Jungkook #ryhming poetry #romance #BTS

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fairyoftbz · 3 years

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it's never too late... | b. jacob

🏀 pairing: crush! basketball player! jacob x fem!reader 🏀 genre: high school!au, fluff, (sort of) strangers/acquaintances-to-lovers 🏀 word count: 5.2k 🏀 tw: very cliché 😳 and it goes kinda fast lmaoo 🏀 a/n: lisa I'm sorry I took this long to do your request, but I hope you'll like it nonetheless!! ALSO: to my fellow Americans, here football = soccer!! 🏀 requested: yes! thank you lisa!! @skrtbabe

╰☆☆☆☆╮

You had waited for this time since the beginning of your academic journey there. Graduating from high school was two months away, and it felt just as exciting as weird.

It felt like you had started your first year last week, but the amount of work and time spent in those dull buildings makes you feel like you’ve been there for at least five years.

It was exhausting to attend classes and see the same people every single day of the year, with repetitive subjects, annoying or cool teachers depending on your luck and everything that followed. The homework, the assignments, the small -or not so small- fights between classes or groups of people, you were praying that university wouldn’t sound like that.

However, at the same time, you were almost starting to feel nostalgic for this time. The last years where you could remain a bit silly before entering the adult world, being in your last teen years with people that you appreciated and met there. You chose to do this before letting them go and live your own lives, memories that will disappear if you don’t cherish them enough.

So, with Soyeon, your best friend, you decided to enjoy the time that you had left to do things together while still studying and revising for the exams, which was sometimes not easy to do. Yes, you shared classes, but personal and private activities sometimes came in the way and prevented you from hanging out.

“It’s life after all,” she said one night over the phone as you shared your opinion on this topic, “it’s good that we can be together almost 24/7, but sometimes, things don’t allow us to be together. It might be for the best, we never know,” she said, trying to be positive no matter the situation she was in, but you knew her well. As much as she wants to appear strong, you had found her many times crying on her own. But it was her personality, and no matter how hard you tried to change her, what's bred in the bone comes out in the flesh.

Soyeon wasn’t your only friend, you were getting along well with most of your girl classmates, as well as the boys that weren’t suffocating under the number of pick-me-girls that were populating your school and your class.

Sadly for you, you’ve been eyeing the most popular (and prettiest) boy in your whole school since you crossed gaze with him at the very beginning of your first year there. Jacob, your crush, was also the star basketball player of your school, and constantly surrounded and attracting cheerleaders or rich, random, good-looking girls, which had a knack for getting on your nerves. He was always spending time together with his pals and teammates, but other people as well. Everyone wanted to be his friend because you know, he had a promising career ahead of him, so it was always nice to be friends with a potential future celebrity.

As defeated as you were, there was still a small voice in your head telling you to do something before he left to go back to his home country, South Korea, where he had a career already planned and traced out.

You were confused as it was almost impossible for you to get a chance with him since you were not one of those girls and you simply couldn’t compete against them, but Soyeon and her boyfriend Sunwoo were always there to praise you and reassure you about your potential chances of dating him. Never convinced by your friends’ words, you had tried many times to get him out of your head and focus on someone else, but it never worked. Everything came back to him. He was unique and oh so nice, everything reminded you of him, and it was sickening at this point.

“He won't get out of my head, it’s getting on my nerves,” you shared your thoughts to your best friend as you braced your head in your hands, slapping your cheeks as if it were going to change anything and help you throw Jacob out of your brain.

“Why do I keep this stupid boy in my head when I know I don’t stand a single chance against those girls,” you slapped your cheeks harder and whined as Soyeon’s hand landed on your wrist.

“Y/N, stop your nonsense. You are perfect, you don’t need to change anything for him!”

“It’s easier said than done, you pulled the football star player!” you exclaimed, and she rolled her eyes, shifting closer to whisper.

“He pulled me because he knew that I am pretty, and that wouldn’t change a single thing for him. If he’s not happy with who I am, he can leave,” she shrugs, signalling you to do the same if you dated Jacob.

Sunwoo was also among the popular boys, but your friend remained the same, not even trying to fit in with the popular girls. She claimed that Sunwoo fell in love with her for her true self, so she didn’t see the point of changing to please other people. And you wished you had her confidence and her strength, admiring her for not changing anything about herself to please others.

Back to the present.

You felt stuck, desperately in love with an unapproachable boy who was too popular and way out of your league to be lucky to have his eyes sparing you any sort of attention. Even if he was a sweet young man, he was always surrounded by popular people, who were trying to hook up or use him for his school fame and sharp features.

One day, while studying with your best friend at the library, Sunwoo and one of his friends, Hyunjae, the football captain, burst into the library and come not so quietly to your table.

“For the love of God, can you both be quiet for once?” Soyeon whispered-yelled but her voice got toned down by Sunwoo vividly pressing his lips on hers, an arm wrapping around her shoulders. Hyunjae laughed but quickly gagged as they didn’t stop the kiss as quickly as the captain wished.

“Gosh, please, get a room,” he mumbled before hugging you, your knee resting against his as his arms pressed you against his chest.

Your friendship with Hyunjae felt more like siblings, he was genuinely nice and caring with you, making sure that you were okay and that you had enough of everything before allowing you to go home. Despite all the teasing and a few rumours going around school, you were not dating and didn’t have any romantic feelings for each other. He simply checked that you had an older brother figure since you were the first-born child, and it felt relieving.

The thing you did not know was that Jacob and a few of his basketball teammates, Juyeon, Eric and Younghoon, were a few tables away from yours, your back facing them, the future star looking at you and Hyunjae from the corner of his eyes. He nodded at his friend at your table, who gave him a wink as an answer, Jacob’s eyes burning holes into your back as Hyunjae was close to you. Too close to you for the basketball player not to feel something churn in his stomach.

Two long, manicured fingers snapped in front of his eyes to get him out of his reverie, lazily looking at the girl that sat across from him, who he was supposed to get help from.

“Jacob please, pay attention to meeeeee,” she whined and pouted, giving him puppy eyes that he couldn’t give a single fuck about, too busy in his mind to hear what she had to say.

She had volunteered to help him study History, but she wasn’t any better, probably worse than he was. It was already the third time Juyeon corrected her basic knowledge without being an expert himself, not even caring about the death glares she kept sending him. It only made him smirk as he knew it irked her dearly yet amused the rest of the table a lot.

They all sighed as she finally took the hint and left their table, Jacob bitterly chuckling as Hyunjae rolled his eyes when she walked past your table, his demeanour making you laugh.

╰☆╮

“Bro, do you think I should ask Y/N for help? Isn’t that a bit… lame?” Jacob sat on one of the soccer balls, hands joined and panting as Sunwoo practised his dribbling skills before shooting the ball in the cages, aiming for the up-right corner. He trotted to his friend and collapsed on the grass next to him, the last rays of sunshine offering his skin a wonderful, honey glow. He ruffled his hair after plopping down, checking his phone for any message before answering.

“If you need help, you shouldn’t be afraid to ask her. I mean, she’s super smart in every subject, but she’s just the boss in History. Her presentations are always golden, and she explains things a lot better than some of the teachers.”

“I got Smith as a teacher,” the basketball player grimaced, his left hand holding his right wrist as his gaze wandered in the grass.

“We’ve got Antal, and I can tell you that she’s always mad when Y/N does a presentation because they honestly just sound better than her lessons,” Sunwoo chuckled as Jacob pondered his friend’s words, the gears of his mind working at full speed.

How is he going to be able to approach you and get to talk to you?

╰☆╮

“Bestie, no. I swear I saw that in the other book,” you said as you found yourself back in the library the following week, bending over the table to grab the book your best friend was resting hers on. You started flipping some pages when a loud, masculine chortle followed by some whispers of annoyance drawing your attention.

“Hi, babe! Hi Hyunj- Oh hi Jacob!” your neck almost snapped as you abruptly lifted your head up at the mention of your crush’s name, a small, embarrassed smile making its way on your mouth. You were a bit sad that your brother best friend was not here with Sunwoo, but you weren’t going to complain to have your crush instead.

“Can I sit here?” the basketball player asked in a soft voice while pointing at the empty spot next to you, making you quickly nod and gather your stuff to make him some space.

You resumed searching for the precious paragraph you were searching for your project as if it were nothing, trying to ignore your stammering heart in your chest and the couple eating each other's mouths. The only thing you hoped was that Jacob couldn’t hear the loud, irregular beats in your ribcage because it would give in your attraction to him.

“Hum, Y/N?” the voice next to you made you flinch, surprised that he knew your name and that he said it aloud.

“Y-Yes?” you said, cursing in your head as you stuttered.

“I heard that you were the Ace when it came to History,” Jacob started, and you couldn’t look at him in the eyes, fire spreading in your chest up to your face.

“I can’t really say that I’m the Ace, but I really love that subject, so yeah I have some… knowledge,” words tripped over your tongue, and your best friend pulled away from Sunwoo and scoffed.

“Some knowledge? Are you kidding?” she said, Sunwoo placing a hand on her mouth as she was louder than intended. She removed his palm and furrowed her brows at him, before turning her head back at you with the same angry expression.

“She knows so fucking much that Antal hates her because she feels humiliated compared to Y/N. So let me tell you one thing, Cobbie, if you need help, you’ve come to the right person. Y/N is just a living encyclopaedia,” your best friend proudly smirked as you glowered at her, Sunwoo chuckling at his girlfriend’s behaviour before immediately stopping.

“Wait, did you call him Cobbie? How come you call him like that when I get nothing other than babe or baby?” Sunwoo argued while pouting, and your best friend sighed, ruffling his hair before pressing her lips against his one more time, making you slightly grimace as envy flooded your veins.

You sighed and dared to look at Jacob, who was reading the beginning of your essay written on your computer, leaving Sunwoo and your best friend bicker like the cute couple they were.

“Do you have this project too?” you asked, and he shook his head, eyes remaining glued on the computer screen.

“It’s so interesting what you wrote, I like your way of writing and explaining stuff,” he offered a small smile as he looked at you, clearing his throat. For someone that was super popular and constantly surrounded by friends or people at parties, he behaved and sounded quite like an introvert.

“W-Well, thank you,” you said with a smile and turned your head to the side for a second, taking a deep breath before looking back at him, opening a new tab on your computer after he gestured to you that he was done reading.

“What do you need help with?”

╰☆╮

You were astonished at how quick-minded Jacob was. Behind his fit, muscular appearance and obsession with basketball, he had the soul of a thinker and grasped the knowledge of historical concepts quite easily and rapidly. He just wasn’t good with the way Smith was teaching, the method not suiting him.

“You retain things well for someone who hates History,” you joked, and he shyly smiled, scratching his neck. His smile looked gorgeous, and you were pleasantly surprised at how much of a genuine person he was.

“Well, History is not my cup of tea, but it might be a bit more thanks to you,” he said, and you tried to stifle a smile, thankful that your best friend was no longer sitting across from you because she wouldn’t have let you two live.

“It’s nothing. You can come back to me if you need help, I really don’t mind. I actually like explaining things,” you said, and he nodded, clicking your pen close before placing it in your pouch.

“Thank you, really. Sunwoo was actually the one that told me about you, so I have to thank him as well,” you stood up and slowly started to pack your stuff, shutting down your computer with a smile.

“I’m glad he did so, I just hope it was positive,” you giggled, and he quickly joined you, twirling his pen in between his fingers as he cleared his throat.

“You know, it’s Sunwoo. It can only be nice and positive,” you genuinely smiled at him and fall in silence, throwing glances at each other from time to time as the conversation was slowly starting to die down.

“And... How’s basketball going by the way? Is everything going well?” you asked, and his heart skipped a beat at your question as it took him off guard.

“I-It’s going pretty well, I’m excited to finish high school to be able to focus on basketball. I’m gonna have to take some of my last finals in South Korea because the season and the training start pretty early in Summer so…” his voice trailed as his eyes widened, a hand slapping his mouth as you both stood up.

“What?” you quizzed, confused by his sudden change of behaviour.

“I… was meant to keep this a secret,” his voice trailed, the end of his sentence falling in a whisper as he started panicking. “Can we pretend you didn’t hear what I said?” he asked as you placed your bag strap on your shoulder, taking your sweater before pushing the chair against the table.

“Said what?” you replied with a smile, and Jacob sighed in relief, somehow feeling like his secret was safe with you, even if you’ve talked to him for the first time at the beginning of the afternoon.

╰☆╮

The rest of the month rolled off smoothly, yet the stress and the revisions became more intense as the days went by. You didn’t hear anything back from Jacob, but you’ve caught him staring at you a few times, offering him an awkward wave and a smile as not to get noticed by some of his “fan girls”, as they called themselves.

You still had a whole month left before finals, and you felt blessed as summer decided to start a bit earlier this year. It was only the beginning of May, but you were already able to wear shorts and dresses. It felt good to see the blue sky and being surrounded by the warmth of the sun hitting your exposed skin after the cold, lonely winter and spring you’ve just got out of. Everything looked prettier and warmer, and it did nothing but make you happier and brighter, despite the stress of the finals piling up on your shoulders.

So, to get rid of this pressure, you decided to leave town with Hyunjae and let him drive to one of the lakes that surrounded your town, knowing that the beach and parks would get crowded in no time. It was a place that you used to go to with your parents when you were still a child, memories that you shared with your friend coming back flooding in your mind.

Hyunjae and his family tagged along to give you some company and take care of you as your parents were busy looking after your newborn twin sisters, Hyunjae and his younger brother acting like elder siblings to you.

After driving for a few dozens of minutes, you settled your stuff in the shade, right under a weeping willow that offered you freshness throughout the entire day. Your best friend napped almost the entire time you were there, hand lingering on his abs while the other plucked out some grass until he dozed off, trying to store as many hours of rest as possible before finals. By his side was you, reading a book and enjoying the chilly water to cool down from the hot temperatures of early Summer, playfully nudging the young man next to you each time he was starting to snore.

It’s near the middle of the afternoon that you heard another car pulling up near the lake, a bunch of excited teenagers coming out of a van. You didn’t pay much attention to them, only sighing as your peace was about to get ruined, their screams when they jumped in the water woke your best friend up.

He abruptly sat up next to you and rubbed his eyes, some sleeping marks lingering on his face, making you giggle. Being the short-sighted idiot that he was, he squinted to try and recognise some people, but he didn’t have to.

A young woman screamed and started jumping up and down, waving her arms above her head in your direction, hearing her scream something towards you.

You looked at each other with Hyunjae, confusion painted on your faces, hearing your phone buzz in your small bag hidden by your folded clothes.

“Hello?” you said as Hyunjae’s phone started vibrating too, picking up the call as well.

“Y/N, it’s us! We’re on the opposite side of the lake! Come and join us!” you heard your best friend yell in your ear, hearing her as well through Hyunjae’s phone, who picked up a call from her boyfriend.

“Okay, we’re coming!” you excitingly said as you hung up, waving at your best friend from your spot as you started packing your stuff to get back in the car and meet up with your friends.

Your best friend excitingly jumped in your arms as soon as you got out of the car,

“Tt’s crazy how we’re so connected! Did you also think that the beach would be crowded?” she asked, and you nodded with a smile, happy to see her this joyful to see you.

The inseparable duo was here, as well as Younghoon, Jacob, Eric, Juyeon and Sangyeon, the striker of the football team. They all engulfed you in a tight hug, Jacob staying in the background the entire time.

“Hi Jacob!” you brightly said and wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him close. “Hi Y/N,” his answer vibrated in his chest and had repercussions in yours, sending your heart flying in your ribcage.

You looked so good being this carefree, it was thankfully a sight that he managed to imprint in his mind despite the shortness of the moment. Being surrounded by all your friends felt so good that you forgot to be awkward and worry about the stupidest things, and Jacob adored seeing you this natural and smiling in the company of your friends. He was a bit sad that he wasn’t fully the reason for your smile though, but he still managed to enjoy the rest of the day with you and your mutual friends, whether you were on the ground or in the water.

Sangyeon, Younghoon and Juyeon copied Hyunjae and joined him in a restoring nap, while Eric, Sunwoo, Jacob, Soyeon and you played different games in the water, improvising a volleyball match with an imaginary net and the ball Sunwoo took with him as the volleyball, but it did the job. It was just a bit hurtful for the liberos since it wasn’t as soft and bouncy as a volleyball, but the joy of the moment allowed any type of pain to become bearable.

The evening eventually started to settle in, and you all got out of the water, drying yourselves before deciding to spend a part of the night here. You helped Sangyeon build a bonfire in the safe area by bringing some different branches, the eldest placing them correctly before lighting them with his pocket lighter.

“Hyung! I didn’t know you were a boy-scout,” Sunwoo exclaimed and made everyone laughed as you all were sliding some marshmallows on a stick, Sangyeon smiling with modesty at everyone.

“Ya, don’t say this,” Sangyeon mumbled, and you smile, rubbing his upper back as he sat down next to you, thanking him when you handed him over his marshmallow stick.

“Oh no! Mine burnt,” Soyeon pouted when she retrieved her snack from the flames, and her boyfriend was quick to give her his sweets, Eric cooing at the gesture of affection.

“Give it to me, I like them burnt,” he mumbled as he bit in the fluffy texture, immediately regretting it as it was boiling. His girlfriend handed him water as he stood up, bouncing up and down to try and reduce what felt like flames in his mouth.

“Oh my, thanks babe,” he muttered with his mouth stuffed when he gulped down everything with a pained expression on his face. Eric’s eyes filled with boredom locked into yours and you both chuckled, your friend shaking his head.

“When is it gonna be my turn,” he huffed and Sunwoo hit him playfully in the back as you all laughed around the bonfire, relating to your friend.

“When you’ll stop being obsessed with football and mango juice,” Eric grunted and folded his arms over his chest as Sangyeon called him out, making you coo and playfully run to him, holding him against you as he fake-cried on your chest while everyone was laughing at him.

Except for Jacob, who only offered a weak smile, but you didn’t catch it, too busy having fun and being light-hearted with your friends.

After your stomachs were filled with sweets and soda, Sunwoo pulled out his guitar and strummed a soft melody until some became heavy-eyed or fell asleep against the other, his girlfriend succumbing to his musical talents first. Jacob looked exhausted as well but forced his eyes open, finding him even hotter with hooded eyelids and his hair slightly curling with the humidity of the air and the lake water.

When it was time to go home, Hyunjae, as well as Younghoon, Sunwoo, Soyeon and Eric decided to jump into Hyunjae’s car to go to the beach, feeling the urge and the thrill of going skinny-dipping. On the other hand, you and the rest of the boys were too exhausted and modest to do this, only wanting to go home and get some good rest.

Just like they had arrived, Sangyeon was behind the wheel while the rest was either next to him or in the back seat. And you didn’t know how it happened, but you got stuck between the window and Jacob, who was struggling to keep his eyes open.

“You good?” you asked, and he turned his head towards you before offering you a tired yet sweet smile, moving his head up and down.

“I'm just exhausted, tonight was simply amazing,” he mumbled, and you expressed your agreement by a happy hum and a nod, bringing your attention to your eldest friend.

“Are you sure you’re awake enough to drive?” you enquired on the current situation and Sangyeon looks at you through the inner rear-view mirror, eyes forming two crescent moons as he smiled.

“I just jumped in the water, I’m nothing but awake,” he clapped in his hands to motivate himself and started the engine, your best friend’s car already gone.

Jacob rested his head against the headrest and closed his eyes, his head rolling to the side each time Sangyeon took a turn. You settled yourself on the window and let the vibrations of the car lull you to sleep, the small talk that Sangyeon and Juyeon were having in the front seats acted like a background noise, which helped you dozing off.

However, when the car pulled up in front of your house, they didn’t expect you to have your head resting against Jacob’s shoulder, his hand on your knee. The two men smiled at each other before Sangyeon got out of the vehicle, drawing the door open. As he was about to carry you to your doorstep, Jacob’s arm was quick to wrap itself around your waist, keeping you close to him.

You woke up confused, blinking a few times as you saw the striker standing next to you with a wide smile on his face. He removed a limb around your body, and you felt someone groan under your right shoulder, noticing in dread that you snuggled up to Jacob for some warmth in your sleep.

“You gotta go before the beast wakes up,” Sangyeon joked and winked as he helped you get out of the car, closing the door behind you. It opened again a few seconds later, Jacob looking just as confused as you were.

“Come on, lovebirds, we don’t have the night.”

“Lovebirds?” Jacob and you asked in unison, the basketball player rubbing his eye with the back of his hand. He jumped out of the van and gestured to Sangyeon to get back in.

“You can go, I live just around the corner,” he drowsily said as he vaguely gestured behind him.

“You sure? Your house is on my way back home, I can drop you off,” Sangyeon suggested but he refused, offering a handshake to the striker before letting him go.

Being more awake now, you waved at your friends driving away before turning to your crush, who looked even more adorable as he was super sleepy and just woke up.

“Are you sure you’re gonna be okay? You look really tired,” you asked, voice still laced with sleep yet sounding caring, which made Jacob’s heartbeat fasten. He nodded and weakly smiled, taking a step closer to you. His attitude was a bolt from the blue as he wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you to him, nuzzling his face in your neck.

“You felt so warm during the ride, it’s almost like I could get used to this,” he tiredly said with a smile, gently pulling away to stare at you, his fingers leaving your back to come and slide a wild piece of hair behind your ear. Your whole body stiffened at his words as he stared at you in the eyes, noticing a small, washed-out smirk plastered on his face.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit... late to start something with someone? I mean, we have finals and then y-you’re le-leaving for South Korea and-” you started stammering as his thumb gently stroked your cheek, loving watching you lose your composure at his display of affection.

“It’s never too late when you love someone,” he whispered, feeling his warm breath tickling your lips in such a delicious manner that you have to resist the urge to move forward and press your lips against his.

His words punched the air out of your lungs, leaving you breathless as he kissed your cheek, mouth slowly moving to the side until it reached your lips. The kiss was soft yet a bit on the rougher side as if he wanted you to understand every feeling he had for you. Instinctively, your arms wrapped around his shoulders, and you kissed him harder, deeper, his hands on your lower back pulling you flush against him.

You had dreamt, wondered about what it was like kissing Jacob, but it never felt as good as you were experiencing it now. Fireworks and butterflies were erupting in your stomach, leaving you dizzy with love and passion as one of his hands came and cupped your cheek, the pad of his thumb gently caressing the skin.

Once you pulled away for oxygen, you held onto his shoulders for your dear life and he chuckled, his mouth slowly travelling down to your neck.

“I-I think my… my- oh my god, my parents will worry,” you gently pushed him away and he stared at you with a smile before diving in to capture your lips in another soft kiss.

“I'm only letting you go if you're free tomorrow. Let's put that off to tomorrow, shall we?” he asked, and your eyes widened at his suggestion.

“We can go back to the lake if you want, but only if we’re alone,” he said, his hand caressing your cheek while the other was busy stroking your upper back up and down.

“I want to enjoy this with you and you only,” he added, mumbling against your mouth and this time, you’re the one pulling him for a kiss.

“Come and pick me up at 10, then,” you said as you pulled away.

“I’ll be there, I promise,” he answered and started walking towards your house, closing the front gate behind you, waving at him with a smile.

He sent you a flying kiss with a smile and you waved at him one last time before closing the main door of your house behind you, both sighing with a huge smile and warmth painted on your faces.

You peeled the clothes off your skin and went straight to the bathroom to take a shower, shaking your head left to right while chuckling as you recalled what just happened in your last month of high school.

Nothing was making sense, you didn’t know how you got there, but you were happy.

And that’s what mattered the most.

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erensthottie · 3 years

Text

Bonnie & Clyde — 1

[Eren Jaeger x black f!reader]

[Song] ‘03 Bonnie & Clyde | Jay Z & Beyoncé

[Warnings] swearing, use of marijuana, act of robbery, a bit of sexual activity, mention of blood

BLRRRRRRR

“WOO! Fuck yeah! Let’s go!” One of the robbers yells as he runs out of the bank smiling big with two duffel bags full of money. Smiling with him, another taller than the first runs behind him to the food truck that the getaway driver awaits in.

Running out with more duffel bags in y’all hands, you and Eren race out to the truck. Helping you in, the robbers take the bags throwing them in, and grabs onto your hands so you can jump into the moving truck.

Just then you guys hear the sound of police sirens blaring from around the bend. Coming at full speed they drift the corner, accelerating to catch up to y’all. Making eye contact with one of the officers, you smirk, blowing them a kiss and a wink before you and Eren close the doors.

“Step on it Alert!” Eren yells to Armin in the driver's seat.

Taking your seats, you sat in Eren’s lap, legging draping over his as you enveloped your arms around his neck full out making out with him. His hands rest on your lower back and outer thigh pulling you close to him, tilting his head to the side, deepening the kiss even more.

“Your so bad you know that?” He smirks at you, slapping you on your thigh making you jump, giggling and smiling pulling him back in.

“What now boss?” One of the robbers asks as he takes off his mask. The same one who ran out first.

“Yeah, boss?” The other one, the taller one adds in.

Eren stops kissing you for a minute, still holding onto you looking at both men.

“Well, Connie… Jean. Now, we celebrate.” He smiles looking back at you.

“What’d you say beautiful?” He rubs your thigh, eyes never leaving yours.

Face getting warm and your body heating up, you softly nod with a low hum, looking right at him, leaning back into him for another kiss which he gladly accepts.

“Yeah!” Everyone cheers.

“Yes sir.” The men voice, bowing and taking their half into their duffel bag.

“Sir, the chef has informed me that dinner is prepared and ready.” A man with freckles told to Eren.

He grunts and makes his way to the route of the master bedroom which you currently stayed.

“You guys can take a plate, me and Y/n will take our share later.” He says as he walks over to the elevator down the hall. Getting in, he presses the third floor and leans back on the railing.

“Beautiful?” He calls as he walks into the living room from the elevator making his way to the room.

“Yes, darling?” You walk out, leaning against the door frame in a small lingerie dress that barely covered your thighs and ass.

Eren's eyes widen and his face turns red as he stops in his tracks. Dropping the bag, Eren lowers his head smiling, tongue poking his cheek while he scratches his chin. He slowly tilts his head back, with low eyes and inspecting your beautiful and amazing body in the sensual and seductive outfit.

"You know," he starts as he untucks his dress shirt, undoing the buttons on it then throwing it somewhere in the living room making his way toward your direction.

"You really are something right. This all for me beautiful?"

Eren unbuckles his belt allowing it to cascade to the wood tiles. Only inches away from you know, he wraps an arm around your body and pulls you close enough, placing a hand on the back of your neck guiding you to lean into the kiss.

You both makeout, entangled in each other pleasure blindly navigating through the room and successfully finding the bed tumbling right onto it while being able to not break the kiss.

"The things that you do to me. It makes me crazy, makes me fucking mad. I want you, I need you, I need your love and your body so bad. Let me make love to you. Let me hold you and tell you everything you crave hear while I go into your deepest places till I reach that sweet, sweet womb of yours and make you cum over and over on my dick. The same one that you love and cherish with your life." Eren slowly grinds his hips into yours, lips moving down your neck leaving open kisses in their waking.

"Will you let me do that beautiful? Do you permit me to reclaim you over and over again? Tell you I love you? Cum deep into your wet and tight pussy that I love and adore with all my life? Will you?"

Overwhelmed with all the oversensitivity and the burning pit deep in your stomach, you desperately nod your head as you repeat, "Yes... yes, yes, yes. Please~"

"Nah Jaeger, you cheatin' out here." Connie says as Eren puts down a draw four card on the deck in the center of the table.

"No I ain't," he smirks taking a puff of the blunt before passing it onto Armin.

"I'm simply just playing the game Con."

"Cap! Y/n can't be helping you pick out your cards, that's straight bull." Jean points to you settled behind Eren's chair, giggling, eyes red and lidded as you stick your tongue out at him only for him to respond with a playful gasp and clutch chest.

"Oh please, Y/n could do whatever she feels like horseface." Eren quips leaning his head back to wink at you.

"Hey! I don't have a horseface you pigeon." Jean claps back.

Everyone including you burst out in laughter, unable to hold it in being that you all are under the influence.

“Marco, it's your turn.” Connie softly nudged at the man spaced out after putting his card down.

Marco blinks a few times to stop himself before looking at the cards in his hand and selected two number five cards, or what he thought were two six cards.

“Ayo, yo, pick up two fo’ your mistake!” Jean says as he starts to pull out cards for him.

“Huh? How?” he protests.

“Fuck is this?” Armin picks up the yellow six and nine card that he had put down.

“Ohhh.”

“Ohhhhh.” Jean mocked.

“Leave me alone, I'm smacked aight?” Marco explains taking the cards from Jean.

“Uno,” Eren says wiggling his last card in between his fingers.

Armin went a place down and a red draw two, leaning back in his chair with a smile, taking another puff before pasting the blunt to Jean “Uno.”

Eren daps him up telling him ‘that's what's up.’

“How the fuck y'all got Uno already?” Jean takes a hit inhaling picking out his cards and putting them down before passing on the blunt to Connie.

Taking his turn with the blunt and cards, he skipped Marco and Eren pointing to Armin to go.

Eren gives him a death look and shakes his head.

“Hey, it's just how the game is played.” he put his hands up passing the blunt to Marco who was once again spaced out.

“Dude, just go to sleep, Y/n will take over for you.” Connie shakes him back to consciousness.

“Yeah, I'll take ‘em for you.” you smile and take his cards taking his place in the chair before hugging him goodnight.

“Another hit Y/n?”

You nod taking the blunt from Connie and taking a deep inhale of the smoke and holding it before exhaling it out through your nose.

“Ou, he got some good cards,” you say sorting out the cards in your hand before you put down four skips.

“WOW!!” Jean and Connie say in unison.

“That's what we doin’ now beautiful?” Eren looks at you, holding the card to his chin.

“As Connie said before, that's just how the game is played.” you retort sending him a kiss.

“Hey, hey. Don't put me in this.” Connie said.

“I’ma getchu back don't worry.” Eren declares.

“Threat or a promise?” you test him.

“Take it how you wanna beautiful.” he jerks his eyebrow.

“If y’all wanna fuck just say da, damn.” Armin snarky remarks make Jean and Connie fall out of their chairs laughing.

“Shuddup Armin.” you joke laughing along.

Continuing with the game, you place down a reverse card making the rotation go counterclockwise. Connie went and put down a plus two to which Jean added another one. Armin then grinned at them putting down his last card, draw four saying ‘uno out’.

All eyes on Eren he looks back at everyone before looking at you.

“I told you I'll get you back right?”

Without saying more words he placed down a draw four on top of Armin’s. Everyone in the group gasps and ooh’s while they look between you and Eren.

“Pick up eight beautiful.” he says as he caresses your cheek.

You gasp, “Oh my God, noooo.”

“It doesn't work like that baby.” you say as you kiss his hand putting down an additional draw four card making the total 12.

From across you, you heard someone stifle their laugh, snorting in the process. You turn to see Armin with his hand over his mouth face slowly turning red from now breathing. He shakingly points his finger towards Connie’s direction. You turn in confusion and see him with a straight face, looking at the pile of cards.

“Connie…”

Everyone except him and you die of laughter, toppling over. He softly places the cards on the table, scooting his chair out, rising and walking away.

“No, No Connie wait!! I’m sorry!” you try your hardest not to laugh, trailing behind him, slightly stumbling from feeling high. He didn't answer only continuing to walk till he walked to his room, entering and softly closing his door.

“FUCK!!”

Y'all hear him yells at the top of his lungs and you laugh even harder than before. It's probably the hardest that y'all ever laughed in your life. You're laid out on the floor, holding your stomach as tears come out of your eyes and you buffer in place silently laughing. Eren laughing loudly head held back stomping his feet on the floor. Jean once again on the floor also laid out like you, shaking in laughter and he screams out with laughter, having that Windex bottle laugh. Armin jumping in his chair, wheezing and crying once in a while snorting loud as hell.

“Did something happen?” Marco voiced.

He was in front of y'all, rubbing his eyes in his oversized onesie with his blanket wrapped around him. That only made everyone succumb to laughter. Armin fell out of his chair onto the floor, Eren slouched in his chair in an uncomfortable position, Jean face down into the carpet and you on your back in an almost starfish position.

Marco freaks out, runs to each of your sides to check up on you only to be met with snores and soft breathing. Y'all laughed yourselves to sleep, who the fuck does that shit? Being as caring as he is, Marco uses the couch cushions and places them under each of the guy's heads, and covered them with blankets, even leveling Eren’s legs so he could be more comfortable. He picks you off the ground being sure not to wake you up and puts you on the big couch right by Eren covering you with a blanket as well.

He cleans up and puts out the rest of the light blunt in the ashtray and packs up the Uno cards. Turn off the light and whispers goodnight before leaving to his room.

Reblogs are allowed

#Bonnie & Clyde — erensthottie #black reader #eren jaeger #eren jaeger x black reader #eren jaeger smut #eren fanfiction #erensthottie work #snk smut #snk fanfiction #snk x black reader #aot x black reader #aot fanfiction #aot smut #erensthottie writing

189 notes · View notes

iisuya-simps · 3 years

Text

A Kings Coronation (Royal au – Otoya x Reader)

A/N: I've been trying to write this since his birthday celebration card came out

Klab please let me marry this man ~ I will give him my s o u l

God, I wish this were me...

Enjoy~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Word count: 2458

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The day of Otoya's 18th birthday. Today he would be crowned king and take over the kingdom. You woke up early and rode all morning from your country to see him. A few hours later you woke to the sun shining in your eyes, seeing how you slept most of the way.

It was crowded when you got there. Guards lined up at every corner. People came far and wide to witness the crowning of a new king. You had to push through the crowd to even get close to the main balcony when a hand touched your shoulder.

“There you are! I finally found you!” You feel someone's arms wrap around your waist. It was him. “Otoya!” You turn and give him a hug, he squeezes you back. “Thanks for coming.”

“How could I miss my best friend's 18th birthday/coronation??” “Haha, this place is totally packed, huh? Just getting over here to you was crazy.” “They're all here for you.” You give a warm smile.

“Congratulations, King Otoya Ittoki.” You curtsy. “Gosh... Hearing you say it all formal like is kinda embarrassing.” He scratches his head. “Well, I'll answer as the birthday king should.” Otoya puts his hands on his hips puffing out his chest. “You have my thanks, dear Y/N.” Then bows. “Maybe that wasn't so regal...” you both laugh.

“Well, today is about to kick into high gear so stick close to me, ok?” “I promise I won't leave your side.”

“Still, I'd find you even if you vanished into thin air. We'll have lots more time to talk if we stick together, plus everyone can know about us right?”

“Know about us?”

“Let's go!” You follow close behind him but find it challenging with all of the people. You hesitate to grab his hand but he takes yours first. You look up and see his bright smile and wink as he guides you through the crowds of people till he sneaks you inside.

“Hey, there's something I'd like to show you.” “Oh?” “Close your eyes.” “Otoya...” You whine. “Come on it's a surprise!”

“Fine.” You close your eyes and he takes your hand guiding you slowly down the hall.

“Don't peek, ok?” “I wouldn't dream of it.” You go down a few halls then Otoya puts his hands over your eyes. “It's just up ahead, so put your trust in me. Keep walking straight.”

Continuing down the corridor you approach some steps and a large door. “There's a small staircase so watch your step.”

“Shouldn't I be the one surprising you?” “Maybe. But it's not often we see each other. Just a few more steps and we're here!” He takes his hands away from your face. “Open your eyes!” Revealed to you is a grand balcony with a gorgeous view of the land. “Ta da!”

“Wow, Otoya!” “Are you surprised?” “This is amazing! I've never been here before.” “This is the prettiest spot in the whole castle, so I had to show you! There's even an awesome view of the ocean!”

You can see every corner of the courtyard. You walk up to the railing and lean forward taking in the sights, Otoya joins you from behind.

“Beautiful isn't it? Wonderful weather, and a beautiful princess.” You giggle. “And a charming prince, soon to be king.”

You both heard a commotion from below. “Uhh, it looks like everyone is looking for me. They won't check here right?” He scratches the back of his head. “Maybe we should go back.” “Nah, it'll only be a few minutes, no harm done. Besides look!” Otoya shuffles in a bag behind his back.

“I brought us some cake for us to eat together!” You cross your arms. “Otoya isn't that for the reception?” “Well yeah but I want to eat it with you now... And it's my birthday so anything goes!” You shake your head and laugh. “Alright then, let's dig in.” “Yay!”

He places the plate on the table to the left of the balcony. “After you, princess.” He pulls out a chair. “How kind of you your majesty.” Grabbing two forks from his bag he sits across from you unwrapping the cake. “Waah, this looks sooo good. Itadakimasu!” You both took a bite savouring the vanilla cake and fluffy buttercream frosting.

“Mmm, I knew it.” “Knew what?” “That this cake is way tastier being here with you than at the party.” “Uh-huh.” “What? You don't feel the same way?” He pouts. “Everything's better with you, Otoya.” “Really? I think so too... With you I mean!” You both gobble down the rest of your cake not saying a word but simply enjoying each other's company.

“Ahh, that hit the spot. Shall we go?” “You have cake on your face silly. You'll look like a fool if you go out like that.” “Hmm? Where is it?” He licks around his lips. “No on your cheek, here.” You laugh stepping closer to wipe the icing with your thumb from his cheek. Sticking it in your mouth you then clapping your hands together.

“That's better.” “T-thanks...” He blushes but quickly recovers. “Well, the party's just getting started.” You place your hands on his shoulders. “Let's make this the best day ever!”

You and Otoya go back down to greet the people outside in the crowd. Staying closely by his side he never let you out of his sight. “Otoya there you are! I swear you have no sense of time. The ceremony is about to begin!” The queen crosses her arms. “Already?” “Yes, now let's go.” “But Y/N...” “I'll be fine.” You smile. He takes both of your hands in his. “I'll come to find you after, ok?” “Alright, now go get your crown.” You wink.

The crowning ceremony was lovely. Otoya took the coronation oath and made a speech. Afterwards, everyone gathered in the main ballroom then the celebration really began. You were wandering around near the edge of the ballroom when you felt a hand pull you around the corner.

“Hey.” “Oh hi.” You smile and fix your eyes on his crown. “So what's next, king?” “Hehe, come with me.” You spend the rest of the day greeting more people, enjoying the food at the banquet and listening to the royal orchestra. When nightfall came Otoya leads you away from the dwindling crowds to his bedroom to retire for the night.

“Wow, that was a blast.” You jump on his bed and sink into the duvet. “We hung out all day huh?” “Yup seems like it.” “Time flies when I'm with you. Oh! And did you hear the band? They were all like bweeh daa daa doooo.” Otoya mimics a violin shaking his head around.

“Ah! My crown is gonna fall!” He juggles it between his hands leaning over and catching it before it hits you. “Gotcha. Whoa!” The carpet slipping from under him he fell on top of you anyway. “S-sorry y/n!” There was a moment you stared into each other's eyes. You blushed a bright red then laughed.

“Cmon... no laughing. I just let my guard down a bit...” he pouts. “You're just a clutz, Otoya.” You scoot off to the other side of the bed. “Am not! I always act like a king should...” “Uh huh. So what does it feel like to be a king anyway?” He places his hand on his chin and ponders.

“It's not much different than being a prince yet I don't think. Though I guess a big responsibility falls on my shoulders now that I am a king. I have a whole kingdom to look out for after all. And you.” “I can look after myself.” “But you don't have to.” Otoya twiddles his thumbs together.

“Anyway... Today is special! After all, you're here with me.” He raises a brow. “Hey, why are you so far away? Didn't you promise not to leave my side? Come sit by me. You're making me lonely...” He pouts again. “Promise you won't fall on me again?” “Not on purpose.” “Haha.” You move closer and the both of you talk about the day's events. Though the whole time, you couldn't help feel butterflies dance in your stomach.

“I had a great time today, Y/N.” “Me too.” “Everything was so wild during the day, but now all I hear is you.” His hand caressing your cheek. You gaze, getting lost in his eyes. “Those lips hold the voice I cherish most.” His thumb brushes over your bottom lip. Leaning forward his lips meet yours as they come together in a sweet kiss. You stay like that for a moment, then part. You turn away embarrassed. “Wait what's wrong? Don't turn away.” He giggles. “You left yourself open for that.” You laugh too.

“Look at me.” He turns your head and your eyes meet once more. “I'm sorry I guess I just wasn't expecting that...” He places both hands on the side of your face slowly pulling you into another kiss. “Were you expecting that?” “Hehe.” You wrap your arms around his neck and kiss him back. You melt into each other drawing out each kiss for as long as you could. “I don't know, were you expecting that?” You both laugh and he pulls you into his arms.

“Oh, Y/N...” He sighs. “I just want you all to myself.” “So selfish, your majesty.” “Hey, a king's orders are absolute you know. That being said, I order you to stay and talk all night to me.” “I guess I cant disobey direct orders.” “Hehe, no you can't.” You lay back and chat in his arms, steadily getting more sleepy you yawn.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” “I did arrange to stay for a few days.” “Really? He beams then suddenly gets nervous. “W-what is it?” You ask, both looking serious and sit up.

“Y/N, would you stay longer if I asked you to marry me?” Your eyes widened. “O-Otoya I-”

“I know it's sudden, I just can't wait. I want you to be mine.” “Are you sure? There are plenty of other princesses that are dying for your hand in marriage.” “Well of course there are other princesses, but you're the only one I have my eyes on. You're too special not to be my beloved.”

“Otoya...” A happy tear slides down your cheek but he wipes it away and holds your hands. “Hows about I ask you again tomorrow? More formally.” “Okay.”

You're unable to hold back the grin from your face. Marry Otoya? Being his friend is one thing but this is a dream come true.

“Oh! I almost forgot!” You get up and grab your purse shuffling around. “Close your eyes Otoya.” “Ok ok... You take the little box from your purse and open it to place a small wooden triangle in his hand. “You can open your eyes now.” He looks down at his hand to see a small triangular pick. “A pick?” He studies it. “For your guitar!”

“Wha-” reaching under the bed you pull out a brand new redwood guitar. “Wow! For me?! Are you sure?!” “Of course! Otoya takes the guitar running his fingers over the frets and strings. “Happy birthday Otoya.” He sets the guitar down by the nightstand beside him. “Thank you Y/N!” He tackles you to the bed holding you tight.

You spend the rest of the night giddily talking about your goals, dreams and aspirations for the future. Eventually falling asleep next to each other.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the morning you wake to a blushing Otoya combing his hand through your hair and your eyes flutter awake.

“Good morning, Y/N.” Otoya presses a kiss to your forehead. “Morning.” You yawn. “Did you sleep well?” “That was the best sleep I've had in a while.” Otoya beams. “Good, are you hungry? Would you like breakfast? I could have the cook bring us something.” “That sounds lovely.”

“I'll be right back!” Otoya rushes off to the kitchen and has a special breakfast made. He returns with the cook serving both of you a buffet.

“Otoya!! We cant eat all this!?!” "That's ok, there's plenty of variety so just pick what you want!” You share a large breakfast together in bed. Otoya insists on feeding you dessert, but after the feast you just had you couldn't possibly take another bite.

After a quick rest, Otoya leads you on a stroll through the garden. It's early spring and the flowers are just starting to bloom. You're walking along when you pull Otoya to a stop.

“Hibiscus!” You wander over to the colorful display of red, yellow, white and pink flowers. “Hibiscus is my favorite flower.” You hold back your hair and take in the sweet almost fruity fragrance. “Y/N.” Otoyas hand takes yours.

“We've known each other since we were kids. As the years have gone by I've realized how special you are to me as a friend and something more. I promise to love and protect you as I will my kingdom. With you by my side, I feel as if I can do anything. I will give you each and every one of these flowers and more.” Otoya kneels down in front of you.

“My heart belongs to you and only you.” You gasp as he opens the velvet box to reveal a dazzling yet subtle ring. “Say you'll be mine, forever and always.”

“Otoya...” You tear up once more. “Yes, of course I'll be yours!” He stood and took the ring out of the box placing it on your finger. You leap to hug him almost knocking him over in the process. This was better than you could ever imagine.

"Otoya, I love you." Your heart pounds as you pull back to look him in the eyes.

"I love you too, Y/N." You share a very heartfelt passionate kiss.

Otoya plucks a flower from one of the branches and tucks it in your hair.

“There, for my beautiful bride to be.” You plant a gentle kiss on his cheek and walk hand in hand back to the castle where you greet the queen.

You feel quite foolish when you realize that it was your parent's plan all along to get you two together, but it worked out so naturally you didn't care. You were getting married to the guy of your dreams, and that was a miracle within itself.

Your wedding was celebrated with your family and civilians from far and wide.

But with Otoya by your side, this truly was a dream come true.

#uta pri #uta no prince sama #shining live #otoya ittoki #starish #otoya x reader

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dabis-devil · 4 years

Text

Nothing Breaks Like a Heart. დ

-; ♡.° [ A/N: ] ୭̥ Okay so this idea just popped into my head and I couldn't not write it. This is my first fic and I really hope it doesn't blow over, let's hope for the best, loves! If Dabi ain't Touya, I'm gonna be a real fool, huh?

-; ♡.° [ Warnings: ] ୭̥ Gn!reader, Swearing, Suggestive content, sO mUcH aNgsT

-; ♡.° [ Summary: ] ୭̥ Everybody knows the infamous villian Dabi, his name spreads fear across the streets of Japan. Many would hate to admit it, but he wasn't always cold and alienated. It all bubbles down to one girl, who left his heart in shambles.

-; ♡.° [ Tag list: ] ୭̥ birthday girl! @queensynderella (👾 here)

━━━━°⌜ 失恋 ⌟°━━━━

It was a brisk Friday night, cool air hitting Touya's pale skin. Bandages clothed his forearms, which seemed to be more burnt every time the redhead came to see y/n. These burns inflicted by his quirk hadn't yet damaged his skin to the point of no repair, but it most definitely wasn't perfect. His large hands fumbled with the clasp of the gate to his home, Touya found himself sneaking out to see y/n more often than not. Enji claimed he was hitting the rebellious stage of his adolescence, little did he know that this would become his son's day to day life.

Against his better judgement, Touya was nineteen and still living at home. He had no where else to go, and he had siblings to rescue from their nightmare of a father. He desperately wanted to take shouto from the unfair wrath of their old man, but he was unable to do so. Instead, he would sweep his brother up into a tight hug whenever he mustered the chance. That poor kid, getting tossed around and neglected. His heart went out to young Shouto.

Touya’s figure was clothed in a baggy black tank top with black jeans and a dark zip up hoodie paired with a pair of black boots (you can @ me on this, he was edgy before dabi became dabi). He had his signature nose studs and additional ear piercings at his time too. He was working on getting a job of his own, something to get him money and fast. After that he would move out, hopefully taking his siblings with him.

As of now, y/n is the only rabbit hole he has. The only escape from his everyday terrors. That's why he was walking alone on the streets around twelve a.m., counting down the very minutes until he could reach their address. The lit cigarette hanging from his lip left a trail of smoke in its midst, that could barely be seen even with the midnight glow. His steps were shallow and speedy, hellbent on getting over to y/n’s place. Seeing that beautiful face every night is what brought him joy, and made carrying on each morning that much easier.

━━━━°⌜ 失恋 ⌟°━━━━

Y/n was sprawled across their bed, carefree and unalert. Like most teens, they wouldn't go to sleep early. They had training tomorrow with the rest of class 4-A, but couldn't sleep. Not with the thoughts pooled in their head, that they sat to contemplate and overthink. Y/n grew distant to their dear boyfriend, Touya, and the guilt weighed a ton. Though the weight of what news you planned to share with him tonight is a million times heavier.

Y/n’s (e/c) eyes we're glued to their phone screen, set on a picture they had taken with Touya a few short weeks ago. A single tear rolled down their rosy cheeks. ' This is gonna break him. ' they thought. Y/n was pulled away from their thoughts when the glass window beside the desk gently rattled, a certain troubled redhead struggling to crawl through their window sill. Y/n frantically wiped their face before he got the opportunity to see a pinch of sadness in their expression- at least a pinch they didn't want him to notice. “ hey baby. . ” they smiled half heartedly, slipping from their cozy bedframe.

“ hey, princess, ” He smiled geekily. As Touya dusted off his jacket from the greenery and gunk that plagued the material, they pressed their plush lips to his. Truth be told they clung to him for a bit too long that night. In all fairness, this would be the last kiss they got from him.

As much as it pained y/n to do this, Touya Todoroki was bad for them.

━━━━°⌜ 失恋 ⌟°━━━━

A little while later, the night had taken y/n. Touya laid with his arms tightly wrapped around their frame, their head atop his clothed chest. He had been falling in and out of sleep as the television played a series- one of their favorites. Y/n on the other hand, couldn't get a wink of rest. Instead, their eyes burned with the sensation to hold back tears. Finally, one spilled over their eyelid. They scrambled to wipe the droplet of moisture away before it soaked through his shirt, not only failing but drawing extra attention to theirself. Touya’s turquoise eyes fluttered open, immediately drawn to y/n. He sat up, in turn pulling them up with him. The fingers of his right hand ended up under their chin, magnetizing his gaze to their own. “ doll, what's wrong? ” he cooed, eyebrows knitted at y/n’s profound sadness.

Y/n did everything in their power to keep their eyes peeled, the only working strategy was simply squeezing them shut. Y/n could no longer hold back the water works, the fluid boiled over and rolled down their pained face. Y/n didn't need eyes to see Touya’s small frown, they could feel it. “ T-Touya. . . ” their breath hitched in the back of their throat. “ we need to talk. ” Y/n’s voice was shakey, and this whole scene was quite frankly uncomfortable considering how out of touch Touya is with his emotions.

Y/n felt Touya stiffen underneath them, and opened their eyes to catch him staring. Turquoise eyes half lidded as usual. He is obviously concerned, one masculine hand rubbing circles into y/n’s back. He kept quiet, giving them the time they need to spit out their burden. “ I. . I can't do this anymore. I can't watch you kill yourself. ”

In more ways than one, Touya had proven destructive. Not only that, but he didn't care. The redheads loving embrace faded, instead it just seemed like a stranger was holding them close. Y/n didn't want to imagine how this made him feel, even worse about how he would pretend to feel. “ I- what? Whad’ya mean? ” Touya scrunched his nose in confusion. “ my quirk? ” the male asked. Sadly he missed the point, and this wouldn't be as simple as they hoped. Maybe he didn't want to accept the truth so soon.

Y/n’s shakey palm met the side of his face, sweeping along his sharp jaw. “ you get high all the time, you don't trust me, you've been so distant these last few weeks. . And when I try to check on you, I get shut down. ” a steady stream of tears now rolled down their cheek. “ I've been thinking about it for a while, Touya. . ” y/n’s choked up sobs filled the room, his silence wavering in their mind. Touya was trying to make sense of the situation, or come up with false feelings. It stung to know that he felt his emotions are invalid. “ I'm so sorry, I just. . I can't baby. ”

Touya was a sitting statue on your bed, his turquoise orbs glued to the sheets. The things you two have done. . The memories. . The plans for the future. . All swirling down the drain. “ I can stop. ” his voice distantly aching with sorrow. his head swiveled towards y/n, giving them all the attention he could. The poor boy was loosing it, just at the possibility of losing the one person that mattered most to him. His anchor

“ I've already tried to get you help. You wouldn't take it. ” y/n frowned softly. “ I can't believe that again. . ” though the last thing they wanted right now was to separate themselves from Touya in his time of need, it was far too much to bare. After all, you can't help someone that doesn't want to be helped.

Y/n slowly wiggled out of the redhead's embrace, instead sitting across from him and holding one bandaged hand within their own. Y/n was begging for him to say something, to say anything. Instead, they would gaze at a shell of what used to be Touya.

“ y/n, please- ” the scarred teen pleaded. His expression was something in a sea of despair, yet he couldn't quite express that. He couldn't cry. All he could do was sit across from y/n and hope they could forgive him, hope that he could fix his issues. His chest was heavy, each rise and fall more tense than the last. “ I'm sorry. . Let me fix this. Please. . ? ” frantic words jumbled, something that made y/n pull him into their arms, and rest his head in the crook of their neck. Droplets of clear water fell down their face, seeing him like this was unbearable. It had to be done.

Fingers combed through the boys spiky red hair, his rapid breathing slowed to a calm. Y/n pressed a soft kiss to his temple. “ I love you, but I can't do this anymore. ” their soft whispers were almost tranquil to Touya, despite the underlining meaning. This voice he cherished each night, he just had to hear it a bit more before he made his exit. “ don't forget that, okay? If you're better in the future, maybe we could try this again. ” they reassured, petting his silky locks.

Touya pulled away, head still hung. “ This is. . This is what you want? ” He looked upwards, turquoise orbs burning into y/n’s, hoping for the answer he expected to be wrong.

“ yeah, ” y/n answered under their breath, breaking the precious concentration on his beautiful eyes.

Touya rose from the bed, reaching for his leather jacket and pulling on his boots. Shortly after, heading for the window. The silence was more than just that, it was the lack of an idea on what to do here. Y/n decided to stand up as well, arms crossed over their chest. “ I- uh- ” he cleared his throat, tugging open the window. “ I'll see you around then. ” he managed to catch a last glimpse of the love of his life, before feeding his slim body out of the window. Tears fell from y/n’s face to the floor beneath them. As much as their fragile heart hurt right now, things would get better. It had to.

━━━━°⌜ 失恋 ⌟°━━━━

The second Touya’s boots hit the leaves beneath him, one foot sprung in front of the other. He found himself running away from y/n’s home, almost as if his life depended on it. He could barely walk, his head was spinning, chest was tight, and his dressed wounds began to ache. Yet his feet carried him away. He didn't want to go home, the thought of going back with no escape made his skin crawl. The moon above lit the teens path as he aimlessly ran.

The time escaped him, as he wound up on the bad side of town. Rumored to be crooks and thieves around every street corner, and worse beyond that. Fresh out of breath, Touya placed his hands on a wall to catch himself, knees buckling underneath the weight. He slid down the brick wall in the dimmed alleyway, scooping his knees up to his chest. He was alone, a bit scared, and heartbroken. His eyes fell shut, and his head rolled onto his knees. Before he knew it, Touya had passed out, with one thing on his mind: y/n.

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berri-hopefulspouse · 3 years

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"Soren, would you like to go first?" Ren never really expected themselves to be before an officiant- let alone for this reason...But, for some reason, they weren't afraid. Not exactly, not in the way they thought they would be. Nodding, they look back to Makoto- after keeping in yet another internal little squeak- and give a soft sigh and a little smile...They were ready for this.

"When we first met...and I mean, truly, deeply first met... I felt almost drawn to you. You said it yourself; we had always had some kind of connection, one that goes beyond time, space...probably even ourselves as we are currently. I always felt drawn to you then, to be close to you- but I could never exactly pinpoint what it was...yet, here we are now. Years later, and we're both still here. Both still...okay. I'll be the first one to say it- shit isn't perfect-" That gets a bit of a chuckle from themselves, "-But we're here...and we're alive. And we have the groundwork for a new beginning."

With a little shaky, nervous sigh, they bite their lower lip and manage to maintain eye contact with Makoto, "...I know I can't always be there when you need me- and I know I can't promise things will be perfect. But I can promise- can vow to you- that I'll be doing my best, each and everyday. Doing my best to improve, to get better, to learn new things, and to love you. Each, and everyday. Always, and forever. You mean the world to me, and to whatever secrets that we may share in the future..." Theres a smirk, and already Makoto knows what's coming, "I'll never tell a single soul. That's a promise, and my vow to you...I'll always, always cherish you."

Despite their light joke, there were tears in their eyes, barely held together through their strict will alone. Makoto wasn't much better- in fact he had to let go of their hand once or twice to wipe at his own eyes, before letting out a soft laugh of surprise himself. Still, after looking to the officiant himself- and getting a small nod- he proceeded to speak himself.

"Ren, first of all, how dare you make me cry like that-" That got a laugh out of the two of them, as well as the small gathering of people who had decided to attend that day, "-Still, still...There's so many things I could say...So many things I want to say- and it wouldn't truly be enough. You're so many things- you've done so much for me and for those around you...and yet, you never stop pursuing to help everyone around you. Everyone except yourself." Despite himself, he rests a hand gently on their cheek to reassure them, to calm them down a bit.

"I thought I knew who I was- someone who didn't quite stick out in the crowd, who was just...well, average at everything I did. And I thought I was okay with that... But uh..." He chuckled nervously, "Turns out that's just self esteem issues, I suppose. You never stopped believing in me- back then and all the way up until now. No matter what we faced, you had full faith in me that it'd be alright. I've always had a more optimistic attitude...and you always struggled to maintain one, but you still were always there for me. You say you weren't- but I assure you, even if you couldn't physically help in some way...I knew you were there for me, in spirit."

He shakes his head a bit, "I guess this is a roundabout way of saying...I'm proud of you. You've taught me so much, and grown so much more than from when we first met. You stand tall- well, really short in your case-" A little joke that earned him a gentle subtle kick with their shoe- causing him to laugh, "-You stand tall in the face of everything you've been through. Each day you keep moving forward, despite what lingers over you...And for that reason alone, I'm so proud of you. You always tell me that I saved you, that I've done so much for you...and while I can't always believe that's true, I can promise you that I'll be there whenever I can. You deserve to have someone who can protect you, and well- if it's me...I guess I really can't argue with that. I love you, Soren...with everything I am. You're my hope, and my proof that my Ultimate Luck truly isn't just a throwaway Ultimate...It's proof that I really am lucky to have you in my life. I swear, I'll never leave you- if you'll allow me to stay in your life...and that I'll always do my best to protect you, and cherish what we have. Always. My love for you is no secret."

He was trying to keep his voice from shaking, truly he was- but while his tone held certainty, his nervousness was equally as palpable in his tone. It was also not much of a secret that, simply put- he had completely did that on the fly, rather than plan it out. All the same, it looked like his words got through to them- the tears they were trying to keep back having started to fall from their cheeks. Leaning into the palm of his hand that still rested on their cheek, they nuzzled into it for comfort before pulling back to let his hand free- a smile on their face the whole while. At least he knew he didn't royally screw that up.

Still, thereafter came the rings- the one thing Makoto knew for certain. Ren may have been the one to do most of the planning- Mostly in part due to Makoto knowing full and well they were better at all of this than he could ever really hope to be- but he was the one who picked what the wedding bands would be. He didn't let Ren see what they were, wanting to get their reaction above anything else. He did his own first, slipping the ring carefully onto their ring finger- trying to quell the slightly anxious tremble of his own hands. He couldn't help being nervous.

The ring itself was simple in nature, but it's meanings would show themselves to those two alone. Theirs particularly had an outer layer of silver- steel, particularly- with moonstone in the middle. Carved into it, were a few small things. A moon and some stars, a reminder of the promise ring they got the both of them and a light comparison to his own band. A small little heart, that had a little ruby heart gemstone in the middle, as it was their birthstone. Lastly, on the underside of the ring, was engraved a few simple words; 'You are my luck, and my hope.'

His was similar of course, rather instead a shade of gold rather than silver with sun and cloud engravings on his own, and an sapphire heart rather than a ruby one. On the underside of his, was something that he heard them say to him once or twice- something that stuck with him, something he observed as they, in turn, slipped the band onto his ring finger.

'You're the reason I believe in my empathy.'

He watched Ren's reaction, though, as their expression shifted from the soft counterance they had previously to curiosity. Then, to thought- likely tuning out the officiant in favor of observing the ring- and finally acknowledgement, gaze snapping back up to meet Makoto's as the tears that had started to slow down only picked right back up. He could faintly notice them mouth something along the lines of 'You fucking dork,' as the officiant had continued to speak, their facade of pride crumbling down with their tears.

The two had been so busy reveling in their own little world for a few moments, that neither had even noticed that the officiant had been asking a question. Makoto, naturally, snapped out of it first in time for him to recognize his name being said.

"S-sorry, what was that?" And, promptly, his question snapped Ren back out of their own stupor, blushing a bit in embarassment. Makoto wished he wasn't in the same flustered state. Thankfully it got a bit of chuckles out of everyone else, and the officiant repeated himself.

"Do you, Makoto Naegi, take Soren to be your spouse?"

"Oh!" Well, if he wasn't red before hand, he definitely was now, "I...I do." ...But he still wouldn't hesitate with his answer, not for a moment.

It got a bit of a giggle out of Ren. At least they were amused at how flustered he was- but he knew full well it was a double edged sword.

"Soren, do you take Makoto to be your lawfully wedded husband?"

Despite watching their cheeks turn a bright red- called it- and noticing their breath bitch a bit, their resolve didn't falter in the slightest.

"I do, now and forever."

Makoto couldn't help but smile at that, the nervous expression he adorned softening into adoration. He could be nervous, sure, but right then and there? With that smile they had on? He could feel nothing but pure, unadulterated love. He didn't notice when the officiant was asking if anyone had any objections- he didn't notice when no one had said anything, or that everyone was staring intently at the two, all he could really notice was them.

He only snapped out of it once more when he heard the Officiant speak once more.

"Then it is my great honor to pronounce you as husband and spouse!" The officiant look to the two with a little grin, "You may now kiss, if so desired."

About halfway through that sentence however, impatient as they were- Ren had quickly grabbed Makoto to yank the brunette into their shorter embrace. Yelping a bit in surprise- it instead dissolved into a little laugh as Ren mumbled a short and cheeky, 'Hey', to Makoto- only before pressing a shy kiss to him. He didn't hesitate to reciprocate, a hand gently combing past the flower crown veil to instead thread his fingers through their hair. Only then did they relax a bit, pressing back with a bit more decor for a few moments before drawing away a bit.

"Hello to you, too, Mx. Naegi," Makoto lightly teased, despite being out of breath. Watching their face equally flush a bright red, but light up with delight, he ignored the small uproar of his friends and family- instead laughing to himself before being ambushed in another kiss from his now-spouse. Despite it all, they made it to this point...New Years Eve- now New Years day...Now, officially, married. To the two, it was clear as day...

What a great way to start a new year.

#[ emotionally hopeful ]#[ ren's art ]#[ ren's s/i ]#[ f/o event: new year wedding ]#I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND I WROTE THIS WITHIN A FEW HOURS AND ALSO FLUSTERED MYSELF THE W H O L E DAMN TIME

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act-addict-actors-matchups · 4 years

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@otomeramblings said,

I'm a girl, 23 years old, around 162 cm, with medium length dark brown hair (almost black) and brown eyes. I'm one of those people who are often asked "are you okay? Are you mad?" and no, more often than not that's just how my resting face looks lol

I'm a Scorpio and an INFP. According to my friends, I'm usually very sweet but no one likes to be around me when I get seriously angry ^^; I guess it's because i'm generally very soft spoken and I try to avoid conflict as much as I can, and when I'm upset is one of the times when I actually raise my voice. I have people tell me that I'm smart, but I just consider myself to be an overall average person. It usually takes me a while to fully trust someone but once they've earned my trust, I cherish their friendship for life.

I can fluently speak English and Spanish, and I recently got my English Translation degree. I love to read (both novels and manga) and to discover new music, I also really like dancing (I did ten years of ballet) and I recently rediscovered my love for drawing and writing.

Qualities I would like in a s/o:

-passionate, about anything, really. I'm usually very reserved unless I have something I really want to talk about and I appreciate when others listen, and for that reason I love to listen to people talk about things they're passionate about

-mature, not in relation to his hobbies bit more so in the sense that he can have a serious conversation when needed and take responsibility for his actions.

-patient. Being introverted and kinda awkward, I usually need time to recharge after being social and even while spending time together there will probably be silences when I think of what to say or even times when I'd just rather we spent it doing our own thing while being together.

Qualities I don't like:

-shouting. I hate it when people shout at me when they're mad because it makes me tear up immediately, I would much rather you tell why you're mad in a calm tone so we can work things out.

✧ The way I scREAMED when I saw your url 🤭 I love your writing so much skdhksdhksjd thank you for requesting a matchup. 😳💞 Stay safe! I hope all goes well for you!

I’d match you with: . . .

➜ HOW YOU TWO FIRST MET ; The blue sky was dotted with fluffy white clouds that drifted lazily in the gentle breeze while you were on your way to buy new drawing pencils. Your current ones were not exactly in the best condition after being used too many times. A sigh escaped from you as you fastened your pace. In all honesty, you would rather stay at home and maybe watch one of your shows but you knew if you didn’t go out to buy those now, you never would. As one particular building came to your sight, you suddenly stopped in your tracks. It was a flower shop. The vibrant display of flowers covered the table outside. Bold purple, soft pink and light lavender flowers sat right in front of you as well as some others you didn’t know the names of. The sweet smell of blossomed flowers filled your nose as you inhaled and exhaled. They were so beautiful that you couldn’t help but to reach at a lavender, the purple petals felt like soft velvet against your skin. The chime of the door opening ringed into your ears, drawing your attention away from the flowers in front of you. A man with a blue striped T-shirt, a pair of black pants and black leather shoes came out of the building with a bag you thought had flower seeds in it. A brown trench coat with a blue inner lining slung over his shoulder, beautiful, dark blue hair rustling as he gave his thanks to the employee before closing the door. The man turned around and you swear you stop breathing for a moment, because oh my god how dare someone this handsome come in to your field of view without a warning. After realizing that you’ve been staring at a stranger for a good seconds, you hesitantly looked away. But just your luck, while you decided that it was the time to carry on with your mission, you dropped your purse to the ground. You groaned before bending over to pick it up but to your surprise, you see another hand reaching over it? And most importantly, you saw that it was that handsome stranger when you looked up??? He gave you a kind but awkward smile as he hold out your bag to you. You muttered a “thank you” before grabbing it. After that cliche moment, there was an awkward silence between you and the man, but he decided to speak up to start a conversation by asking if you liked flowers. The conversation smoothly flowed from there. He just had that aura of gentleness radiating that you couldn’t help but warm up to the stranger, who you later learned the name of, quickly. He even offered to accompany you to the shop you were going, which you agreed if he didn’t mind. Your relationship steadily developed from there. To be honest, it wouldn't be obvious at all that Tsumugi has a crush on you. He's friendly and sweet to everyone he meets most of the time so nobody thinks twice whenever he's with you, except maybe Tasuku. His underlying feelings for you would show in the little things he does, the way his eyes shine whenever you laugh, how his ears perk up whenever he hears your name, how he somehow memorized all your favorite foods after you offhandedly mentioned it once before. For someone who majored in psychology, it’s kind of hilarious how dense he is regarding his own feelings. He would mistake those feelings of his as a weirdly strong platonic attraction for you and continue spending time with you in hopes to appease the feeling but be confused as to why he always felt unsatisfied. He finally realizes how smitten he is for you after a long internal monologue he had after he almost had a heart attack when you hugged him once for whatever reason.

➜ PERSONALITY COMPATIBILITY ; Tsumugi is the walking epitome of every single thing you’re looking in a S/O. You want someone passionate about something? This man literally couldn’t give up on his dream and love for the performance art. He’d be more than willing to talk about how acting involved a broad range of skills, including a well-developed imagination, emotional facility, physical expressivity, vocal projection, clarity of speech, the ability to interpret drama etc. He’d try bunch of different gestures in front of you and ask you which one you liked the best. He also absolutely loves it when you are the one who does the talking. His strength is CANONLY listening to others after all. He just gives off this aura that compels you to think that you can talk about anything and everything with him. Just like you, Tsumugi has a great need for harmony and dislikes any conflict so if there were to be any fights, they would be resolved in a day or two with the two of you talking it out. He majored in Psychology in university, and is very good at reading people so if you’re both in a social gathering and he senses you need to take a break, he will hold your hand and walk you somewhere with less crowd and noise. When you want to be alone, he’d give you the space you need and if you want to spend time he would be there. He is a pretty clueless baby at the start and would try to ask people for help on dating advice. He will however remember every single memory you two will and have made. You’ll never see him forgetting any milestones in your guys’ relationship. His way of saying “I love you” is through the flowers he picks and grows. As someone who can be shy to vocally express his love for you, he handpicks each flower based on their meanings with the hope that they could accurately convey the emotions he holds for you. The very sight of your smile as you watch each tiny plant grow kindles a budding warmth inside him, as if he’s a bee intoxicated by the nectar of your happiness. And to him, the vision of you happy is prettier than any flower in his garden, pushing him to always keep you bright and blooming.

➜ SHARED ACTIVITIES ; Tsumugi canonly moon/stargazes with Misumi so why wouldn’t he do the same with his S/O? It’s a cool, romantic and surprisingly unique activity to do together. There aren’t many activities one can plan for a date that are sweeter or more intimate than a night spent together under a beautiful, sparkling sky. You would ask each other questions about one another, without being afraid of letting the conversation slow down. This is a date to relax and linger over. If not that, I can totally see him taking you to a botanical garden. These places are beautiful and not too busy in general. Bonus points if you bring a camera and get some nice photos together as a couple. i’m so soft rn 🥺 But I feel like your most common date would be either tending the garden in the mankai dorm or just doing your own little things while being together. You might be writing on the table while he’s going over his script for the winter troupe’s newest play one more time or he might be grading his student’s test, since he’s a tutor and all, while you’re drawing. I see Tsumugi as someone who reads a lot so maybe both of you can read the same book together and discuss it afterwards. These types of dates are great for discovering how the other person views the world. One might learn that their significant other is passionate about a social justice cause, their favorite author, or their philosophy of beauty. These dates are great for sparking good conversations and they are introvert friendly. Or something even better: reading aloud. Reading out loud to each other can be incredibly sweet. And, as spiritual counselor Davida Rappaport says, "just the fact that you are both close and sharing space is ... a nice way to spend an evening."

➜ ZODIAC COMPATIBILITY ; Tsumugi is a Capricorn, his birthday being December 28th. When Scorpio and Capricorn make a love match, they get an opportunity to not only enjoy a loving relationship and learn the value of being a pair, but also to grow and mature as individuals. These two may be wary about sharing themselves with one another at first, and this emotional caution may dampen the initial impact of this relationship. These two tend to be a bit cautious (Capricorn) and pensive (Scorpio), and it takes a while for them to feel comfortable with a significant other. Though they may be shy of getting involved and not the quickest to trust and share, these two Signs will discover that they can have quite a profound connection — one of friendship and deep loyalty. What’s the best thing about the Scorpio-Capricorn love match? Their determination toward shared ideas and their strong devotion to one another. They can open doors to one another’s souls and show one another new ways of perceiving and feeling.

#tsumugi tsukioka #a3! matchup #act! addict! actors!

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littlesupernaturalwords · 6 years

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Not Him Part Two

Written for SPN Hiatus Creations | Week 4

Warnings: DARK!FIC, angst, torture, mental and physical abuse, manipulation, kidnapping, held captive, non-descriptive forced sexual encounter, non-con, rape, forced nudity, arguing, swearing, low self-esteem, self-doubt, DON'T READ IF YOU ARE TRIGGERED BY ANY OF THIS, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED

Pairing: shapeshifter!Dean x reader (pre-established Dean x reader)

Prompt: “Vampires, Werewolves or Shapeshifters”

Word count: 5 269

Summary: You left the Bunker after you'd had an argument with Dean. Soon enough, you find yourself regretting ever stepping a foot out of your home; your mind fuzzy and your body weak, a monster with your lover's face finds its way into your life in a way you will never be able to forget.

Series Masterlist | Masterlist

Dean loved you.

You kept repeating that like a mantra to yourself, not letting fear overcome you, as your lover sliced your skin. A shiver ran down your spine. Dean pulled back to look at you, smiling lovingly, before he put the knife against your collarbone and pushed. Your heartbeat quickened as you tried to breathe through the pain, willing your muscles to stay relaxed. A jolt of pleasure cursed through you along with the sting once Dean withdrew the knife, and you closed your eyes to cherish the strange sensation, your brain high with adrenaline and endophins. Dean hadn't cut you too deep; he'd just drew enough blood so it would trickle down your flesh and mix with the liquid already drying on your skin.

But you were trembling nonetheless. Your body was in shock from all the constant pain that began to overpower the pleasure, shallow cuts gracing every part of skin Dean could reach. You weren't smiling anymore, but tried not to react when he pushed the blade a little too deep and pain shot through your shaking thigh. Your clothes were in pieces, hanging on you just by threads, but you didn't even think about covering yourself.

This was Dean. He loved you. And he was doing this for you.

"Where's Y/N?" Dean asked impatiently the moment Castiel came through the door to the Bunker.

The angel frowned, walking down the stairs, and came to a stop by the table in the War room. "She is not with you?" Cas asked, tilting his head to the side. Dean inhaled sharply and turned around, running his hands through his hair. You'd left the previous night and they hadn't heard from you since. Dean was becoming anxious and more impatient with every passing second.

"You mean she hasn't prayed to you?" Sam asked, trying to stay calm. He'd made Dean get a few hours of sleep until their angel friend got there, but started to regret that decision. He'd tried to track your phone, but you either turned off the GPS or broke your phone all together.

"No," Cas replied hesitantly, his eyes drifting between the brothers, "not since you hunted the ghoul in Missouri." There was a loud smack which made Sam's and Castiel's head whip towards Dean as he sent everything that had been on the table flying to the ground. He threw his phone into the opposite wall with a pained shout and the small device shattered to pieces.

"Dean-" Sam began, but his brother cut him off.

"It's my fault," Dean said so quietly it was barely above whisper, his voice laced with despair. Sam shared a look with Castiel, but neither of them said a word; they knew it wouldn't change anything. You were gone and Dean wouldn't stop until he found you. And he didn't care who stood in his way.

"Dean," you breathed heavily, but your lover didn't stop. He dove the knife into you with a twisted smile, uncaring of your trembling body. His slices became deeper, more sadistic; Dean kept pushing until tears started streaming down your cheeks and you strained against the ropes binding you. There was no more pleasure in what Dean was doing to you. His hands were rough, smearing blood across your skin and pushing on already scabbing wounds until they started bleeding again, and you wanted to tell him to stop; wanted to shout at him, tell him he was hurting you. But then he looked up at you with so much love in his eyes and caressed your cheeks so gently, you couldn't help but lean into the touch and smile even through your tears.

He loved you. He was doing this for you.

"What is it, sweetheart?" Dean asked you softly, crouching to be at the same eye level as you.

You swallowed a sob. "It hurts," you whimpered pathetically, wanting it to stop, but wishing to be good for Dean even more.

"Oh, I know," he murmured and leaned so close your foreheads were touching. You closed your eyes and immediately relaxed, the simple touch enough to calm down your aching body. "You're doing so good," Dean praised you, stroking your hair. "Such a good girl for me." Blush stained your cheeks and you smiled, leaning forward to press your lips against his. The kiss was gentle, loving, and said more than any words ever could. You didn't pull back, not even when your lungs started burning from lack of oxygen, and it was Dean who had break the kiss before you lost yourself in him completely. He stayed close, your noses touching and his hand cupping your cheek. "Just a few more, sweetheart. Just a little more, okay?" Dean asked against your lips.

You swallowed a whimper. Your body was aching, screaming at you to stop the pain, to stop the constant stinging and throbbing you felt in each cut with your every heartbeat. It was hard to breathe, hard to focus, hard to relax your muscles so it wouldn't hurt more. But you wanted to be good. For Dean. He loved you, he would never hurt you if he thought there was any other way. You took in another shaky breath before answering. "Okay," you breathed and reached for another kiss. Dean kissed you back hungrily and licked at your lips with his tongue. You granted him entrance without second thought and tried to get even closer to him, until the ropes cut into your wrists so much you knew there would be burns from them later. You whined when he parted from you, but Dean only smiled at you lovingly and got up. He grabbed his knife from the table, withdrawing something from his jacket. It was a small glass bottle, barely more than an inch tall, filled to the brim with milky liquid and secured by a cork. You watched as Dean pulled the cork out and dipped the blade into the fluid before he set the bottle down and came closer to you.

Your heart was racing in your chest and more tears filled your eyes, but you still tried to smile at him. There was so much love in his eyes when he brushed your hair back and brought the knife to your shoulder. Dean stilled the knife against your skin, but didn't break it, a questioning look on his face. He was giving you an out, you realized. Emotions rushed through your body as tears of joy fell through your eyelashes and a quiet sob left your lips. Dean loved you and he didn't need to say it out loud - you saw it, clear as day. You gave him a single nod and that was all the premission he needed. Acid smell filled your nose only a second before Dean cut through your skin and quickly lifted the knife. The cut wasn't deep, but you couldn't say it stung - it burned you alive. Fire filled the shallow wound the moment Dean broke the skin and spread through your whole shoulder. You screamed. Ropes cut into your wrists and ankles, your body trying to get free, twisting and writhing in the chair, but it was no use.

You didn't notice Dean bringing the knife to your stomach and only registered he did so after fire consumed the whole middle part of your body. You screamed and panted, not even trying to stop your tears, pulling and struggling, twisting your head to tell him to stop. It was too much. Everything was too much. The light suddenly became too bright, the ropes too tight, your head dizzy. It hurt. There was no pleasure, not a single thought about pleasing Dean. You needed it to stop - and you needed it now.

"Dean, please," you sobbed quietly, writhing in the chair in a desperate effort to ease the pain, to soothe the fire that spread through your body like acid filling your weins. Your vision was blurry with tears, your skin overheated and sweaty in your body's hopeless attempt to cool it down.

A warm hand cupped your cheek. "Just one more more, sweetheart," Dean answered your plea softly and you found yourself nodding automatically. You didn't want it. You wanted, no, needed him to stop. And yet, all you did was close your eyes and lean into his touch, trying to distract yourself from the pain. You felt the cold blade on your thigh and struggled to relax. Why did it hurt so much? The cuts were barely deep enough to draw blood, but what you felt was like fire - consuming and overwhelming. You held your breath.

The tip of the blade broke your skin and your effords to be quiet died along with everything else you'd thought was important. Agony. That was the only way you could describe what you were feeling. You were screaming and panting until your voice broke and your mouth stayed opened in a silent scream. You bucked against the ropes, whining and sobbing openly, trying to get away, trying to get it to stop.

"Please," you begged, struggling to breathe, "Dean, please. I can't- I can't." Sobs wrecked through your shaking body as tears formed behind your closed eyelids.

"Shh," Dean soothed you and cupped your cheeks with his hands. You didn't get lost in him this time. It was too much. Too many sensations rushed through your body and mind; burning, sweat, tears, heat, even Dean's voice were too much. "You did so good," he whispered in your ear, wiping away your tears and nuzzling against your neck. "You were so good for me, so brave. I'm so proud of you."

There was no satisfaction when you heard the words. No pleasure, no joy, nothing. Nothing but the constant pain and throbbing of your aching body. Broken. You felt broken and weak, quietly sobbing even as Dean kissed your forehead and stroked your hair, stuck to your sweaty skin. You couldn't keep your head up. It fell limply against your chest, ringing filling your ears and black spots dancing in your vision. A foreign noise sounded somewhere in the room, but you were too far gone to recognize it. You welcomed the darkness that threatened to take you, seeing it as release from your pain.

Dean gently lifted your head. "Come on, sweetheart, you can't fall asleep now," he told you softly, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs. "Open your eyes, Y/N," Dean ordered and you didn't dare disobey. Your eyelids were heavy, but you forced them to open and blinked several times to try and clear you vision; it didn't help. "There you go," Dean whispered against your skin and kissed your forehead again. The elder Winchester slowly withdrew his hands from your face, making sure you would keep your head up by yourself, and moved to the ropes on your wrists. He quickly untied you from the chair and kissed the burned skin, whispering gentle words and praises, but you were too tired to actually hear them. You didn't move your hands when he crouched to untie your ankles, just sat there in what remained of your clothes, covered in blood and sweat. "I'm so proud of you," Dean repeated as he rose up and kissed you deeply. You didn't respond to him. You didn't react even as he slipped his hands over your back and under your knees and picked you up like you weighed nothing.

You curled into yourself, still on fire, and whimpered into his chest. Dean carried you to the bathroom and carefully set you down on the toilet. You fell back against the wall, too weak and tired to hold yourself up. Dean carefully undressed you from your ruined, bloody clothes and kissed every single patch of skin he uncovered, humming and mumbling against it. You thought you should feel violated, being stripped by him, but you didn't; you didn't have enough energy to do anything. Everything hurt. You hissed even when the soft fabric of your shirt scraped your arm. You had no more tears to spill, no more words to say. Emotions rushed through you, but even as they did, you didn't know what to do.

Dean pulled you from your thoughts when he came up to brush his nose against yours and gave you a quick kiss. He didn't wait for your reaction and scooped you up into his arms. The same noise you'd heard before filled your ears as he carried you to the bathtub and slowly lowered you into the water. You didn't scream. Small whimpers and whines escaped your lips once the too-hot water hit your skin, but you didn't say anything.

"I know, I know," Dean said in a low voice, trying to soothe you. "Shh, I've got you." Dean closed the tap and you realized that it was the strange sound you'd heard. Your blood mixed with the water and turned it a dark pink colour, but you didn't notice. Everything stung and ached and Dean was holding you up so you wouldn't drown. His fingers were gentle, running over your damaged body and washing the blood away, until the water became too dirty and Dean had to refill the tub to make sure you were clean. He massaged your scalp, working shampoo into your hair, and mindfully washed it with clean water before he put the conditioner in. Gentle, oh-so-careful, fingers cleaned your body with soap and you whimpered and gripped his hand tightly. Dean didn't stop you, only leaned closer and caressed every part of your skin that wasn't injured, letting you squeeze his hand as a way to deal with the pain. The fire lessened, but it was still there, burning you from the inside, and you realized it was the liquid Dean's dipped his knife in that made it so bad.

Why had he hurt you like that? Because he loved you, you replied to yourself. But why would he do that? To make you stronger, make you brave for him. But you didn't want this. Didn't you? Didn't you want to be a good girl for him? You knew the answer, but didn't know what to think.

Your hands loosened and Dean quickly finished washing you and brought you back to the room, uncaring of the water that wettened his clothes as he laid you down on the bed and quickly dried you with a towel. Your skin was painfully tight, the cuts pulsing and itching, and you writhed in discomfort. Dean lay next to you and pulled you to him with his hand around your waist and your back pressed to his chest.

"Shh, sleep, Y/N," he whispered in your ear. You laid your hand over his and laced your fingers. Dean knew how much you liked to sleep like this, how safe you felt in his arms, and a happy smile pulled on your lips. You closed your eyes, willing yourself to ignore the pain, and inhaled Dean's scent deeply. And that was the moment you froze; he didn't smell like Dean. There was no leather, no gunpowder, even no oil in his scent. The man behind you felt you tense and pulled you closer, whispering praises in your ear. But you couldn't hear him. Everything came back to you.

He was a shapeshifter. He'd persuaded you Dean didn't love you, didn't care about you. He'd manipulated you into needing him. Manipulated you into craving him, kissing him. You felt sick to your stomach. The arm around your waist tightened, making sure you couldn't move. You were trapped.

Dean sat at one of the tables in the library, his hand itching to reach for the bottle of whiskey he kept next to him, but stopped himself; you needed him. Sam was scanning every single route you might have taken and Castiel was sitting at the table with his eyes closed, straining his ears to hear anything on the angel radio, waiting for you to pray. Dean felt useless. He was the one who'd made you leave in the first place, but there was nothing he could do to find you. Frustrated tears prickled his eyes and he had to resist the pull the alcohol had on him not to drown the whole bottle down.

Castiel straightened his back suddenly and his impossibly blue eyes fell open, landing on Dean. The angel spoke before either of the brothers had time to ask. "I found her."

You didn't know when or how you fell asleep, but you woke up suddenly by someone calling your name. Your eyes shot open and you tried to sit up, only to pull at ropes, your wrists tied together and secured to the headboard.

"Y/N!" somebody called again and you whipped your head to the sound. Dean was standing above you, his eyes wide and full or concern. "Don't worry," he said when he noticed you were looking up at him, "I'm gonna get you out of here." He quickly reached above your head to pull at the ropes.

You eyed him warily, not sure whether he was the real Dean or the shifter. His demeanour was different; his face twisted with worry, dark shadows under his eyes. He cursed when the knot didn't loosen.

"Dean," you whispered breathlessly, tugging at the ropes.

His face softened. "You're safe with me," Dean assured you and you nodded. Your eyes fell on the door to the room and you realized you had no idea when the shifter would return. A whimper left your lips, urging Dean to hurry, just as he mamaged to untie you. You shot up and wrapped your arm around him. "I've got you," Dean said and helped you up to your feet. You were nude, covered in scabbing cuts, and your whole body itched, urging you to scratch the fresh wounds.

You made a wary step, biting your cheek to suppress a cry, and pulled at Dean's arm, urging him to move. You had to get out of there before the shifter came back. But Dean stayed still, his head down. "Dean, we have to go," you whispered quickly.

Dean looked at you with a disappointment frown. "Would you really leave me, Y/N?"

Your blood ran cold. This was the shifter. You took a step back, but he caught your upper arm and squeezed, his nails cutting your skin and opening your scabs. You clenched your teeth and tried to yank your arm free, but he gripped your hair and pulled your naked body to him.

"You would leave me, huh?" the shifter growled lowly. He squeezed your hair tighter, your scalp burning with pain. "Your Dean let you leave, but I won't let you do that." His grip on you loosened enough for you to look up at his face; it was twisted with hurt. "Why did you try to do that?" he asked softly. "Why would you want to leave me after being so good for me?"

You didn't answer. His praise had no effect on you this time and you swallowed hard, trying to find a way to overpower the shifter with Dean's body. He was stronger than you, but you were faster; but at the position you were in, you were helpless - one hand in your hair and other on your arm, pressing you to him, locking your arms between your bodies.

The shifter sighed. "Will you be good for me?" he asked and you nodded. If he let you go, this would be your chance and who cared you were naked; you needed to get away from him. He smiled sweetly, guiding your lips to his and kissing you until your lungs burned for air. You couldn't pull away, the hand in your hair stopping you, and he let you go only after you struggled against him. You panted, trying to catch your breath, when his hold on you loosened. "Get on the bed," he ordered and your eyes widened. He chuckled at your reaction, but caressed your cheek with the hand that had been pulling on your scalp only seconds ago. "I have to punish you for what you did, sweetheart," he explained, still keeping his touch gentle. "Now, get on the bed."

You nodded, keeping your head down and waiting for the right moment. You needed him to loosen the hand on your arm just a tiny bit and you were confident you could get out even in your injured state. The shifter withdrew his hands all together and you took your chance. You turned and sprinted to the door, uncaring of your injuries. Your hand landed on the knob when the shifter's hands wrapped around your waist and pulled you off your feet.

"No!" you shouted and kicked your legs. You tried to slam your head into his nose, but he was holding you too low for you to even reach his chin. He roughly threw you on the bed. You tried to squirm away, but he quickly covered you with his huge body, pressing you down with all his body weight. You slapped him and went for his eyes before he caught your hands with a growl and brought them over your head. You recognized the rough ropes the moment they touched your skin, but couldn't do anything as the shifter tied your wrists back to the headboard tightly. He forced his knee between your legs and checked your hands were immobile before moving down your body. The second you saw the rope tied to the bottom corners of the bed, you screamed louder than ever before and kicked your legs desperately, hitting him square in the jaw.

He roughly grabbed your ankle and brought it to the edge of the bed, keeping your other leg down with his knee. You squirmed and shouted, pulling at the ropes so hard you were bleeding even before he was done tying the first ankle. You fought him with all you had as he tied your other leg, keeping you open for him, completely at his mercy.

Tears filled your eyes and a sob left your lips once he straightened up to look at you. "Please," you begged, but it was as though he didn't hear you.

"So beautiful," he breathed and ran his fingertips up your legs. Your skin felt like sandpaper - rough, dry and peeling. His hand came close to your womanhood and you desperately tried to close your legs, but he passed it and touched your stomach. His mouthed went the same path, kissing up both your aching legs, up your stomach where he sucked at your belly button and up between the valley of your breasts. You twisted and squirmed beneath him, shouting and crying the whole time, but the shifter posing as Dean overpowered you easily. "So beautiful for me," he whispered as he kissed your neck.

"Please," you sobbed, "please, stop. I don't want this, please."

"Shh," he shushed you and kissed your lips. "I have to punish you, Y/N." You whimpered and turned your head to the side, but he only moved to kiss along your jaw. Warm hands were running over your body, squeezing at your abused flesh and it only made you cry harder. "Don't worry, sweetheart," the shifter purred, "I'll make it good for you."

You fought with all you had, squirming, twisting and stretching until he had to hold you down by your neck, cutting all your air supply as he thrusted into you. You screamed and cried, clawing at the ropes, praying somebody would just come through the door and save you from the monster with your lover's face, forcing its way into your body, but nobody ever came. He nipped and pulled at your skin and you screamed until you couldn't anymore, your voice breaking and turning into hoarse grunts as he broke your skin with his brutal pace and blood poured down your body and onto the sheets. You couldn't look at him. As the last screams died in your throat, you turned your head away, letting your body go limp and tears run across your nose and into your hair soundlessly.

It wasn't Dean. This wasn't Dean. And yet, every time your body shook with his assault, you felt his fingers digging into your hips. It was his voice whispering how much he loved you. His lips kissed and nipped and bit at your skin. And it was his face you saw; the vibrant green eyes, the beautiful full lips, the tiny freckles you so loved. He fucked you, thrusted into you so violently you thought he would split you in two. He was getting close. You could feel him twitch inside of you and he came with a shout, pushing you over the edge with him. You didn't want it. You didn't want the orgasm that made your toes curl and your back arch. Sobs wrecked through you even more powerfully than before.

You closed your eyes when he withdrew from you. He tortured you, manipulated you, raped you and yet, there was only one word that could describe what you were feeling as emotions swirled through you: nothing. You felt nothing. You waited for the anger, for the hate or shame to fill you, but it never came.

You didn't move when he untied your ankles, kissing the burned flesh. You didn't react when he kissed his was up your body, paying attention to every bruise and mark he'd left on you. You didn't look at him when he turned your face to him to kiss you, your gaze remaining unfocused. And you didn't do anything to escape even once he freed your hands and helped you put them by your sides. You only turned to the side and brought your knees up, still staring blankly into the wall. The bed dipped next to you and the shifter turned you to your other side easily and pulled you to him without resistance. He didn't speak for a long moment, only held you to his chest and kissed your head.

"You're so good for me, Y/N," he whispered into your hair, but you didn't even blink. He raised his head to look at you and sighed once he noticed your unfocused gaze. "Get some sleep, sweetheart," he said and laid a hand over your eyes. You didn't do anything to shake it off, didn't even flinch when his hand made your whole world turn black. You only stared into the darkness, feeling your spendings begining to dry between your thighs.

The Impala came to a stop in front of a motel three hours from the Bunker. Dean spotted your truck immediately and wanted to jump out of the car right away, when Sam put a hand on his shoulder.

Sam struggled to find the right words and sighed. "Just don't do anything stupid," he said finally and Dean only nodded, loading his gun. He got out of the car, Sam and Castiel following only seconds after him, and went to your truck first, his fingers laced around his gun. Your truck was dirty and cold, indicating you hadn't used it in at least a few hours. Dean looked inside, but found nothing out of the ordinary.

"She's inside, you know," came a voice that made his heart skip a beat.

Dean turned abruptly, pointing his gun at the man in front of him. Only he looked exactly like Dean - his face, hair, even clothes were the same. A shifter, Dean realized and clicked the safety on his gun off.

"Who are you? What did you do to her?" Dean shouted. Sam was by his side in a second, Castiel behind him with an angel blade in his hand.

The shifter smiled darkly and brought his hands up in surrender. "She killed my mate," he said angrily, keeping his eyes fixed on Dean "I didn't do anything she wouldn't deserve."

And with that, Dean shot him in the heart.

The spot next to you was cold. Everything hurt. You stayed curled on your side, but every cut and bruise the shifter had put on your skin reminded you of him. You knew there were bruises on your neck, making it hard to breathe, but didn't care. You had no tears to spill, no sobs to let out; you only lay in bed, curled up in blanket, and kept your eyes on the wall opposite to you. You hadn't slept, but couldn't remember when the shifter had left you.

Nothing - that was what you felt. No emotions, no thoughts, no plan, nothing. You knew it wasn't Dean who had hurt you, but his face, even in your happy memories, haunted you. And yet, there was no hate towards him - simply nothing.

The door to the room opened, but you stayed still, readying yourself for whatever he might do to you. The mess between your legs had dried on your skin, reminding you of what he had done, and it made you pull the blanket higher in a desperate attempt to protect yourself. Footsteps echoed through the room and came closer to you.

You didn't react when somebody put their hand on your shoulder and pulled the blanket down slightly.

"Son of a bitch," you heard Dean say and curled into yourself more. You'd thought you couldn't cry anymore, but you had been wrong; the moment his deep voice filled the room, the dam in you broke and there was nothing you could do to stop your quiet weeping. You didn't want him to hurt you any more, didn't want him to touch you.

His hands pulled the blanket lower, uncovering more of your abused skin, but you did nothing to stop him, only lay there soundlessly, praying to Castiel to come and save you, to put a stop to your misery. Dean turned you on your back without resistance and you gripped the blanket tighter, not wanting him to see more.

A single look at his face had you trembling and sobbing. You closed your eyes, pressing hands over your ears, so you wouldn't hear the voice of the man you loved.

Dean didn't know what to do. He reached to cup your cheek, but you only sobbed harder when he touched your skin. "Y/N, it's me," Dean said, but you didn't hear him. But he didn't need you to say anything to know what the shifter had done; purple, finger-shaped bruises blossomed on your neck, cuts covered every spot of your skin he could see along with bites and marks.

Dean hadn't noticed he'd been crying until tears blurred his vision.

You couldn't look at him. Sobbing and shaking, you tried to hide under the blanket, but found you couldn't move; your body was spent, too weak and tired to do anything other than just lay and wait for what your rapist would do next.

And Dean suddenly understood; you'd killed the shifter's mate, but what he'd done to you was so much worse. He made sure you couldn't be with Dean anymore. Ensured that when you saw Dean's face, you wouldn't see the man you loved, but the abuser the shifter had been. Dean realized you would always see him as the monster you both knew deep down he really was.

And it shattered his heart.

A broken whimper left your lips and you realized the shifter had been right all along; Dean didn't love you. He didn't care about you.

Because if he did, wouldn't he have come for you already?

17 notes · View notes

lizzieart · 6 years

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Hey!! As much as I'd enjoy the idea I doubt I'm worth that much to you, but I'd love to hear about the characters you've created and if they are based upon anyone you know or knew for the ideals behind them. Hope you get this soon I'm interested in your stories.

Well first of all bless you, and second you are already worth that much to me because you took the time out of your day to send me a message! Seriously, thank you. I am a lonely garbage can. And third, yes, some of my characters are loosely based on people, but most are just based on traits I relate to and/or admire.

I’m going to put the rest of this answer under a read more; if you choose to read it, buckle up, ‘cause there’s a huge fucking wall of text below.

It all started with a homebrew one shot my friend Cait was running in the winter of 2013. I had never played a tabletop RPG before (I’ll still say tabletop even though she was running it online), but I had always been interested in her worldbuilding and characters; it was a frequent topic of discussion for us. Plus, I trusted her pretty much explicitly with my sensitivities, so even though I was anxious, I agreed to join up. The campaign didn't start for a few months after, so I spent plenty of time asking Cait as much as I could (without spoilers) about her world. After all, I was (and still am) a person who completely overthinks every little detail of something I’m into (yay special interest fixation).

Just some background on the setting; there are two groups of people in this world, magi and non magi. Magi were heavily persecuted (like at the threat of death) for hundreds of years, but not so openly in present time (although this can depend on region). The Havens is a city built almost exclusively by mages, for mages. It was a fortress that provided sanctuary to mages during wars long passed, and in more peaceful times turned into one of the largest universities of the arcane in the Uplands. There are other countries/continents other than the Uplands, but those have not been planned out at this time (to my knowledge). Anything else world related I should be able to answer as we go along in the rest of this text (or if you send me another ask; though we’ll see if you want to after this lmao).

Saoirse was a real diamond in the rough for a while. I knew my babe was in that mess of ideas somewhere, but it took a bit to figure it out. I decided on a name first (I had been aching to use the name Saoirse), and I drew quite a few pictures of her before I settled on a design, but even that changed over time as I grew accustomed to drawing literally anyone else besides other white people. I had educated myself and knew what nasty tropes to stay away from and made her a person. She's a confident, powerful, mentor figure, and her exuberance for life and love of her family has gained the adoration of colleagues and friends alike. She has her faults; she tends to overextend herself trying to help people or gets caught up in her work; but it all stems from a place of great compassion; she is dedicated to making the world a sweeter place. To be honest, somewhere along the way Saoirse turned into everything I want and hope to be. She has a family and friends who she is close to and love her dearly. She never has to hide her feelings or work to earn their love. She just has it. Saoirse is a child of love in its purest form. And she brightens up my life every day.

Brennya started out as one of Cait's NPCs, but a relationship grew between her and Saoirse after the events of the one shot. Cait and I aren't always in contact due to life issues and school and work, but she let me keep writing interactions between Brennya and my other characters regardless (thank you). Also, while it is a side note, have I ever mentioned that Cait’s absolutely brilliant? She double majored in English and Geology and then got accepted into grad school right after that. I love her. So even though I can't (and wouldn't out of respect) claim Brennya is purely my character, I was allowed to continue writing for her. And the way I write Brennya is honestly pretty personal. Brennya is closer to the person I am currently... and have been in the past. Brennya is loved now too, but Brennya was not born into love. Love was conditional, a commodity contingent on success; personal worth built on actions and achievements, not being. She grew to be a successful scholar nonetheless, but success rings hollow when you have no one to share it with. She can be deeply cynical of the intentions of other people and readily manipulative of others (getting what she can from them before they have the chance to do the same to her). She expects deceit and is truly thrown off guard when confronted with an honest person (like Saoirse). She wants things like family and connection and truth, but has a hard time believing they exist for a person like her. So she pretends that she is impervious to those feelings; that wanting those things is trivial in the span of existence; until she can no longer deny it. When she meets Saoirse, it's not easy at first. Being truly cherished at no expense of your own is difficult to understand for someone like Brennya (and for someone like me), but it is a truly beautiful thing if you can accept it. Meeting Saoirse’s family is overwhelming for her at first too; they are an intense bunch; but they accept her almost immediately, simply because she makes their daughter happy. Brennya acclimates eventually.

Personally, though I’m still not in a great situation, I have healed from of a lot of bitterness I used to hold. Seeing them happy inspires me to do better in my own life; realizing that while it may take time, it will ultimately be worth it. And that someday I will be able to love and trust fully.

Anyways, the rest of them are a little more lighthearted in nature, I swear!!

Aoife is Saoirse’s sister and the middle child of the Keir siblings. She’s the fun, flamboyant sibling; always jovial, super pretty, and damn good at making others feel welcome. Aoife sees everybody as a potential friend. Gods help you if you mistake her good nature for weakness though; she’s a powerful force to be reckoned with. She’s a vital part of the Bluewater Town Guard, and she loves her work, preferring busy places like the town square or the docks, where her nature as both a protector and people person can flourish. She also adores the town’s children and always makes time for them. She lives in a house on the Keir property with her wife Mazneen.

Mazneen is my newest character, so forgive me for not having a lot on her yet (I’m trying to do something new while being culturally sensitive). I also think it’s important for me as her creator to state explicitly somewhere down the line that she is a trans woman (representation is a high priority for me), but with the really angry and reactionary culture of tumblr these days, it’s really hard to create trans characters without someone getting upset (watch, someone will write a really angry callout for me not ‘performing her gender right’ or something… well guess what buds, there’s no one right way for a trans woman to be trans! BEGONE TERF!). What else I can tell you is that she is outgoing and so incredibly sweet, and loves helping people see the beauty inside themselves like she sees in herself. Mazneen is also a savvy businesswoman and trader originally from the Havens, and has family, friends, and business contacts there (I just haven’t gotten that far in her writing). She currently lives and works in Bluewater with Aoife’s mother, Meirna, in her tailoring business (accounting and supply are her specialties). They mostly make clothing suitable for cold climates like Bluewater, but occasionally produce some finer pieces on commission. Their regular clothing is really popular amongst the whalers and even gets shipped to other parts of the Uplands. They’re basically running something like a fantasy L.L. Bean if that makes any lick of sense.

Meirna, who I mentioned earlier, is the Keir siblings’ mother and the wife of Roarke. She is a woman of great intelligence, tact, and grace; people used to tell her that had she not married a whaler she could have been a favorite of the Havens elite. But she chooses to completely disregard this, and to this day she is more than happy with her life; she is still in love with her husband Roarke, runs her own well-known business, and has three very successful children. I also have the inclination to make her deeply spiritual in some way; the Uplands actually has a few religions with a decent pantheon of gods, but I haven’t quite figured out the details of that yet. Regardless of spirituality (or lack thereof), people look to her for comfort and guidance.

Roarke is the father of the Keir siblings and Meirna’s husband. He’s a retired whaler but still an active part of Bluewater’s whaling guild. Being retired certainly doesn’t keep him from being out on the water though; he just fishes for a lot smaller catch these days. He loves the outdoors and has a fire for life that just can’t be tempered. But he’s also a MEGA DAD. Like the best Dad I imagine one could hope for. He loves his family so much and he’s so proud of his kids and all their achievements. Intense honestly just isn’t strong enough to describe the way he lives his life. Roarke is the epitome of ALL THE TIME ALL THE TIME. Just a huge dude with an absolute heart of gold. Where else could Aoife have gotten it from?

Arlen is the youngest of the Keir siblings, and takes after his mother more. His intelligence and patience are unrivaled; and his charismatic and comforting presence gives him the perfect bedside manner as a physician. He studied at the Havens like Saoirse and Brennya, but with a focus on medicine instead of arcane arts and archaeology (Saoirse and Brennya's concentrations, respectively). He’s an accomplished healer and has been instrumental in improvements made to Bluewater’s current health awareness and services. He spends time every year to make trips to Snowshower, the large city northeast of Bluewater, and sets up a free clinic in the impoverished areas of the city. He eventually ends up in a relationship with Rory after some time (still working on those details).

Rory also started out as an NPC. He was originally the character that was Saoirse's call to action; a former student in a spot of trouble, and Saoirse just didn't have the heart to turn him down. Except that the trouble he was in was, in fact, much more trouble than originally stated; a large debt with a notorious Poppyport (a city on the southernmost coast of the Uplands) crime syndicate, Redbloom (also can you guess their specialty lmao). After the events of the job, Saoirse finds out that she's only thirded his debts. Turns out he's got some serious impulse control issues and formed a gambling habit that, as you can probably imagine, got way out of hand. He has an intense need to impress people with flashy displays, always trying to one up himself and others, but quite often these gestures fall flat. Rory was chasing that dream of being famous and left Bluewater a few years back, only to become known as a fool. And even though it was free publicity, bad publicity is only just publicity until you owe a crime lord his debts. So Saoirse takes a risk and flees Poppyport, making her way back to Bluewater with Rory in tow. Redbloom has no ties to a whaling town like Bluewater, it isn’t profitable enough. So now he’s stuck in Bluewater for his own safety, and it would have driven him nuts if it weren’t for befriending the Keir family. He still isn’t a huge fan of life in Bluewater, but his work and friendships keep him well grounded. He eventually starts dating Arlen sometime into the timeline, but I haven’t written any of that yet; it’s only a series of ideas right now. I do also want to look into writing a resolution with the whole Redbloom debt, but we’ll see where the story goes. He’s always been… A little all over the place. He was a mandatory character and I really had to think about a way to work him into the story, and even now I’m still not completely satisfied.

I guess my main point is that I’m not nearly finished yet; I’ve only just begun getting bits of my story down, but I’m dedicated to expanding this family and their world and I just really love them all to bits. And apart from their main story I’ve got some alternate universes I like to work on too, like their Dragon Age AU. I’ve actually written quite a bit of meta and dialogue, and even drawn some for that one. I haven’t really shared it with anyone yet though; haven’t figured out a delivery method that feels quite right yet. I tried starting a blog for it, but it got stuck in the development phase a few months back. Maybe I’ll try and figure that out soon. I’ve just got so many ideas! Anyways sorry for the wall of text and thanks for hanging in here with me with I figure shit out! If you have any more questions I’d love to answer them!

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