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inherdaze · 2 months

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jungle — kiyoomi sakusa

kiyoomi x f reader

18+ content, pining, slow burn, sakusa wears dog tags mmm, smut, acquaintances to lovers. kind of a historical au? (think 1930s) idk bro it's like all made up. mentions of pregnancy

summary: kiyoomi seeks serenity after coming home from war.

There’s lots of commotion outside. Hollering, cheering, squeals and shouts paired with the sight of lovers reuniting, families coming together, men picking up their children and spinning them around in the air. You watch from the kitchen window as you wipe down the dishes, see some people carelessly pick the flowers from your yard to bunch up and give to wives, children, husbands, the like. Normally, you’d scold them for being so careless and probably offer a pair of garden trimmers so that they wouldn't crush the surrounding flowers, but you let it pass. Everyone is happy. The war is over.

Your mother watches as she stands next to you, handing you over the dishes to dry once she’s finished washing them clean. She looks at you from the corner of her eye, gouging out your reaction before clearing her throat.

“Do you remember Kiyoomi?”

You freeze for a second, plate and rag in hand as you try to think. “Mm. No?”

“The Sakusa family?”

“Oh,” And then you start again, rubbing the plate dry. You don’t really remember the boy, only that your mother was friends with his mother and that apparently the two of you played around as young children. You don't remember the last time you saw him. Probably couldn’t even point him out in a crowd.

“He’s coming home.”

“From the war?”

“Yes.”

“Would you like me to gather some flowers for him? There’s plenty in the backyard, too. None of the crushed ones.”

She sighs before placing the plate she held back into the sink, turning to face you entirely.

She says your name softly. “He’s coming home. Here.”

“Why? For dinner?”

“No– well, yes– but he’ll be staying here. With us.”

You slowly put out the plate face down on the long countertop cloth to let it air dry. “Since when?”

“We’ve been exchanging letters.”

Ah. You had been wondering what that was about. Each time the mail came in, your mother would scurry to get it before you could, holding it to her chest protectively before gently slicing it open in the study, purposely keeping it from you. You thought she had been exchanging letters with some sort of admirer, so to speak. You thought she’d be afraid to tell you she’s moving on after years of your father’s death.

She continues, “His parents passed a while back– they both fell ill while he was away. He just needs somewhere to stay in the meantime so he can get back up on his feet. I'm sure there are plenty of other families that would be more than happy to host a soldier, but I suppose he would feel more comfortable here. I mentioned the garden and the chickens and he said he’d help you out with those. Don’t let him, though.”

“Huh? Why not?”

Your mother lightly swats your arm and gives a quiet scold of your name, “He isn't here to work. He’s here to rest. He’s been through a lot, you know. Just let him be while he’s here.”

You roll your eyes. Your mother can tell that you're not really annoyed.

“He seems very reserved in the letters we exchanged. If he’s formal with you, insist that he don’t be. We are friends of his. Make him feel comfortable, okay?”

You hum and nod. “Okay.”

There’s a pause.

“When will he be here?”

Your mother nearly answers before you've even finished asking.

“Tomorrow.”

You’re an early bird. Even when you don’t want to be, you must. You have to tend to the chickens in the morning, tidy up and make breakfast for your mother before she goes out to the market to sell the eggs.

The morning dew that sits atop the grass kisses at your shins as you trudge towards the coop, face lit by the oncoming sunrise. The sky shifts from deep blue to a lighter blue to purples and pinks until the sun finally reaches the top of the sky.

As you get closer to the coop, you hear the familiar and pesky repetitive clucks, appreciative that the coop is farther out into the yard and not by your window.

You slide the coop door open, stepping to the side as they rush out with curiosity.

“Mornin’ kids,” You start before emptying out their dirty water, tossing it into the grass before turning on the hose to fill up the bin.

You replace the water, give them more food, collect the eggs that are deemed ready, and hang out with them for a good thirty minutes to make sure they’re healthy and roaming around like normal. You sit on the grass, knees to your chest as you absentmindedly say hi to them when they pass by or stare at you.

Once the sun has almost fully risen, you grab the basket of eggs and make your way back into the house, slipping out of your boots before stepping inside.

The morning goes as always; Your mother wakes up, thanks you for handling the chickens, thanks you as you place her breakfast on the table, gathers all the eggs she needs to sell, and kisses your cheek before she heads out to the market.

“Kiyoomi should be here later, once I’m already home. Please make sure the spare bedroom is clean, with fresh sheets. If he happens to arrive early, be nice.”

“God, don’t act like I’m insufferable! I won’t drive him out.”

She smiles knowingly. “I know, my dear.”

She looks like she wants to say more, but swiftly turns on her heel and takes her leave.

The rest of the day is spent cleaning up the spare bedroom to make sure it’s nice and welcoming for when your new guest arrives. You smooth out all the bed linen and wipe down the dressers, making all photo frames and little trinkets look presentable. It doesn't take long for you to set it all up– the bedroom has always been very empty. You wonder how it'll look like when it’s more lived-in, with boots and coats and whatever else he may carry laying around.

You slip into the kitchen and wash your hands, preparing to make lunch. With the curtains on the kitchen window drawn shut, you fail to see the man that climbs up your porch steps, eyes downcast as he raps his knuckles on the door a few times.

You freeze in your spot almost violently. It’s much too early for him to be here, and when you glance at the clock on the wall, you’re convinced that it has to be someone else– perhaps the neighbor?

Drying your hands on the apron tied to your dress, you draw back the kitchen curtain to get a little peep.

You almost squeal as you back away from the window, covering your face with your hands like you’ve just seen something you weren't supposed to– but you had just seen him. He was… big. That’s all you could think.

When you open the front door, the two of you stare at each other, silent.

Yes, he’s big. Broad shoulders, gifted with height, and his chest seems…. inviting in the military uniform he wears. You finally make eye contact with him, scanning over his handsome features, the two little beauty marks that rest atop his eyebrow, the pretty curve of his lips—

“Hello,” He says with an air of formality, and you clutch at the skirt of your dress.

“Hi… hi.”

He stares at you blankly.

“I, ah— come in, Kiyoomi,” You start, standing to the side as he takes off his boots and leaves them by the door, following diligently as you lead him to his room. He doesn’t even spare a glance to look around the house, eyes trained on your back.

“Here,” You say, opening the door to his room. “The bathroom is down the hall, my room is right there– right across, and my mother’s room is the farthest one down the hallway. There’s a, um, study if you'd ever like to read or spend some time in there. Do as you like,” You explain gently, a warm smile on your features. “I was just making lunch. Are you hungry? Would you like some?”

“No thank you,” He says immediately, looking down at you. “Thank you for letting me stay here.”

“Of course! My mother should be here in a few hours. For now, the house is all yours– er, ours, but– well, yeah, yours…” You trail off with embarrassment, looking into his eyes for help, hoping he’ll finish your sentence or laugh it off with you.

He doesn't.

As soon as you back away and start walking back to the kitchen, he shuts the door softly and coupes himself up in there.

You frown to yourself, remembering your mother’s words. He seems very reserved, let him be, he’s been through a lot.

You do just that, careful to not make any noise as you prepare lunch, then sit by yourself at the table to eat. There’s a light clink and clatter of the dishes as you wash them, but you can only hope he doesn’t mind.

Noon turns into night and you’re still alone. You haven’t heard Kiyoomi leave the room or rummage around at all. It’s like he never even arrived.

You’re not surprised when your mother comes home and deems the house empty (besides you being there) and exclaims that the both of you must rush and start working on dinner because Kiyoomi deserves nothing but the best. You feel your skin prickle hot for some reason. She wasn’t wrong, but if Kiyoomi had heard her say it, it sounded like she was one of those old ladies who desperately fawn over younger men. You didn’t want him to get the wrong idea.

You laughed nervously and bumped her hip with yours, quietly telling her that he had already arrived.

She gasps dramatically, hand flying to her heart as she scolds you.

“Why didn’t you invite him out here to sit with you? Has he eaten lunch? Did you offer him lunch? Goodness, my dear, this is no way to host someone. Ask him to step out! Did you show him around the house, at least? Oh, heavens– did you change the sheets?”

Your ears feel terrifyingly warm, knowing very well that your mother was loud enough for Kiyoomi to hear her through closed doors. Just thinking of him overhearing you get scolded made you want to scuffle away and complain in embarrassment to the chickens.

“My apologies, miss.”

The both of you whirl around to see Kiyoomi, who looks absolutely delightful, you think.

His curls are mussed as if he had been sleeping, uniform ditched for a skimpy white undershirt tucked into some slacks, the planes of his chest peeking out and greeting you handsomely. The dog tags that are strung along the chain around his neck glint in the kitchen light, almost like they’re saying Hi. “It’s not her fault, I assure you– I had turned down her offer for lunch, and I just wanted some time to myself after arriving. No hard feelings at all.”

He speaks in such a collected and calm manner, and his face and eyes look empty. He’s good at containing all his emotions.

“Oh,” Your mother breathes out, a wistful smile creeping onto her face. “Oh, my lovely Kiyoomi!” She rushes towards him and cups his face, smushing his cheeks in her hands, beaming up at him. The action makes his eyes widen, hands immediately flying up to push hers away, but he stops himself just in time and lets them fall back to his sides.

“How you’ve grown! My goodness, it’s been ages, my love, please– please sit down, we’ll make some soup, okay? Just rest. Tell us, how have you been? Any good stories?”

She greets him like a mother would, and for a second, you think you see his features relax. Not wanting to get caught ogling at him, you turn and face the cutting board, lining up all the vegetables needed for the soup.

The two talk the entire time, your mother silently leaving the task of cooking up to you. You don’t mind at all, keeping your back to the both of them to hide the look of shyness on your face. Every time Kiyoomi speaks, you feel your hands stutter.

The conversation is mostly your mother gushing over him and how much he’s grown, telling him he’s such a handsome young man, asking him how his trip over here went, and then she asks him if there is a woman in his life. You know that it would be normal for him to feel a little flabbergasted from such a question, but you don’t know why you feel so embarrassed as well.

You figure it’s because if he says he does have a special someone in his life, your mother would turn around and berate you (in front of him) for not being ‘out there’ enough and for not seeing someone already.

To your surprise, he weakly mentions that no, he doesn’t have anyone like that in his life. He quickly excuses it by saying that he had been too busy during the war to worry about such things.

Your mother laughs good-naturedly, flailing her hand around, “Oh, of course. Silly me!”

By the time your mother opens her mouth to tell him that there are plenty of riveting people around town that he may like, you announce with your back still facing them, “Soup’s ready.”

You serve your mother and Kiyoomi, keeping your head down as you approach him and place his bowl on the table. He thanks you in a quiet, rumbly voice that makes you go completely still for a split second.

Conversation dies down as the three of you eat. Your mother has pulled out as much as she can from Kiyoomi. He avoided a lot of questions about the war, about his experiences, about what he saw. You can’t help but wonder.

Your mother interrupts the silence as she subtly turns to face you.

“How are the vegetables doing?”

“Growing,” Is all you respond as you stuff another spoonful of soup into your mouth. She’s grasping at straws to not let the atmosphere turn awkward.

You figure that if Kiyoomi is going to be staying here, may as well be casual, treat him like anyone else (despite the fact that he looks like he came down straight from Heaven).

You shift in your chair, the wood creaking. “Tomorrow, could you buy some more flower seeds from the market? You can pick which. I need to fill in the spaces that were crushed yesterday from all the people.”

Her eyes light up, “Of course, dearie. Thank you for reminding me.”

The two of you talk about mundane things for the rest of dinner, topics you usually discuss. Kiyoomi finds it comforting. Makes him feel more at home.

The next morning, you rise before the sun kisses the sky, as always.

You pull on the short linen clothing you use for working, old stains of mud and grass forever tainting the articles. As quietly as you can, you pad around the house before reaching the back porch, tugging on your work boots before stepping into the fresh morning grass.

Unbeknownst to you, Kiyoomi is also an early riser, a habit that he has cultivated over years of training. He watches you from the backyard’s dutch door, the top half open. He rests his elbows on the bottom half and leans forward, watching and listening as you greet and coo at the chickens like they’re your children. His eyebrows twitch up when he hears you reprimand one– Stop putting grass in the water, Harold!

After you dump out the water, you pick up the water bucket and take it over to the pump, working the water into it. With your back turned to Kiyoomi, you don’t hear as he steps through the grass towards you.

“Good morning,” He greets politely, and you yelp.

Whirling around with the half-full bucket in hand, the water flies out and crashes right into him, soaking his torso and the entirety of his pants.

You drop the bucket.

“Oh my gosh– oh, Kiyoomi— I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry, oh my goodness– I didn’t– I’m so sorry—”

You're petting his torso worriedly, as if your hands will soak up all the water that has been spilled. He knows you have good intentions and are just trying to help somehow get the water to dry, but your touch makes him stiffen.

You’re repeating that you're sorry, and the more that you ramble on, the more he can hear the tremor in your voice as you squeak and swallow and try to push this upcoming embarrassment down. Kiyoomi lifts his hands and places them right on your arms, completely stilling you. “It's fine.”

It comes out clipped, like it's not really fine, but you can’t tell if he's annoyed. His face remains stoic.

“I’m so sorry,” You whisper.

“It's okay. You weren't aware that I was here. I understand.”

You look over him again, the bottom half of his cotton shirt soaked and his pants clinging onto his legs like paint. You’re so embarrassed and ashamed that you can't even find it in yourself to admire him.

“You’ll– you’ll get sick. Let’s go inside,” You plead, stepping away from his touch and gathering your skirt in your hands to run back into the house, hastily kicking off your boots before prying the bottom half of the door open.

He watches you scurry around the house to make him some tea, pouring water into the kettle and sorrowfully letting him know it’s gonna take a few minutes. You advise that he changes but don’t push it on him too much, not wanting to be over controlling.

He disappears into the room and shuts the door, and you plop onto the dining table chair. Resting your head in your hands, you mentally chastise yourself for messing up like this, and on the first day that he's been here, too.

The kettle whistles. You pick yourself up to see Kiyoomi already looking at you, in a pair of clean clothes. Embarrassment crawls up your spine.

“I’m sorry.” You say again, turning to silence the kettle and pour the water into a mug before adding a few loose tea leaves.

“I’ve already forgiven you.”

“I know, I know but– I’m really sorry.”

He only sighs. You take that as a sign he’s frustrated.

“I’m stepping back outside,” You say, “Still have to get stuff done.”

He nods stiffly. You walk with your tail between your legs to the backyard porch, putting on your boots and this time shutting both halves of the dutch door.

You confide and whine to the chickens as you clean up and spread out their food.

Despite the incident, Kiyoomi insists that he help you out in the mornings. He follows you out to the back porch and manages to slip past the threshold before you can shut the bottom half of the dutch door to trap him inside (he can always just open the door and walk by, but you tell him it’s the prospect of trapping him inside that matters the most. His eyebrow twitches at that).

He lingers as you talk to the chickens, which you do quietly now that you know that he’s there. He pretends to look away when you tell Harold good morning.

When you finish saying your greetings to the birds, you tell him to go back inside. This is your job only and he should take this time to rest or get some extra hours of sleep– but he insists. He tells you he can’t sleep for any longer, he’s spent years rising early and getting straight to work and if he were to lay in bed he’d just lay restless.

You know your mother will scold you later, but you offer him some work to do anyway. You tell him to replace the water while you give them fresh food. And he does so gladly, falling into a rhythm with you that, if a stranger looked at the scene, would convince them that he belongs here and always has.

There’s this sort of look of serenity on his face, like he’s content to be doing something rather than staying in the house (which is what your mother has been pressuring him to do).

The rising sun kisses his face, reminding you of his beauty. His skin practically glows and you can’t help but let your eyes linger on the moles on his forehead.

In this kind of lighting, you see faded scars on his hands and arms, earned from hardwork and fighting and war and other things you cannot even imagine. They make him seem gruff (more than he already is) and in a way, scary. But the way he handles the chickens and the land and the water with such a tender touch tells you otherwise. For a brief second, you wonder if he would hold you with such care as well. You shoo the thought away.

Kiyoomi stays with you while you watch over the chickens. He stands while you sit on the grass.

“Talk to them,” You encourage.

He lifts an eyebrow. “And what should I say?”

“Ask them how they are.”

Kiyoomi clears his throat and looks at one of the chickens, “My… My dear Harold,” He starts, “I hope you are in good health.”

You laugh, “So formal, Sakusa.”

He finds himself humming. Humming. Humming in amusement.

When you're done with the chickens, you tell him he can go back inside and relax while you check up on all the vegetables, but he tells you he wants to help with that too.

You untie your apron and start checking on and picking the ripe vegetables, bundling them in the cloth. Kiyoomi, truthfully, seems a little lost as he handles pulling out the vegetables and leafy greens with a sort of hesitance as if he’s afraid to hurt them. You scoot over closer to him and offer some help.

“They won’t cry in agony, Kiyoomi.”

“I–” He starts, embarrassed. “You mistake me.”

“How so?”

He doesn’t answer, runs out of excuses. Suddenly Kiyoomi thinks the sun feels warmer when your hands brush over his own to guide him, encouraging him to pluck at the vegetables. He gets the hang of it, bundling up all the produce in your apron before the two of you make your way back inside.

When your mother sees the both of you step in, kicking off your boots and hands stained with dirt, she tsks at you.

“I specifically told you not to ask for any help.”

Embarrassment blooms in the depths of your chest. Getting scolded in front of Kiyoomi will be the death of you. You want to defend yourself but you don’t want to throw him under the bus, either. You hold the bundle of vegetables and greens closer to your chest, almost protectively.

“She did no such thing,” Kiyoomi interjects before your mother can continue. He stands tall, seems bigger, voice collected but strong enough to cause the both of you to jump. It’s been ages since you and your mother have been in the presence of someone as powerful as Kiyoomi.

He visibly slackens, clears his throat. “She didn’t ask for my help– told me to go inside, actually. I took it upon myself to help her.”

“Oh,” Your mother breathes out, tone suddenly sweet and forgiving. “I see.”

The silence that rests between the three of you could pierce your ears. You skitter into the kitchen to wash all that you’ve collected and leave your mom and Kiyoomi alone. In a matter of seconds, she’s already cooing at him and telling him that there’s no need for him to be working, it’s fine if he wants to rest inside, there’s plenty of time for him to spend his days off. He’s silent in response.

After you make breakfast and your mother leaves for the market, you gather all the dishes and make a beeline for the sink, pouring hot water over the dishes to scrub them clean.

Kiyoomi follows up behind you, rolling up the sleeves of his cotton shirt, bunching it up right above his elbows. You watch as he leans forward to grab a washcloth, swallowing when you see his dog tags swing low as he dips down. They clink back onto his chest when he stands upright.

“Thank you,” He says suddenly, eyes focused on the plate in his hands as he wipes it in a circular motion.

“What for? I should be the one thanking you, Kiyoomi. You defended me in front of my mother.”

He takes a second to formulate what he wants to say. “I must thank you for letting me work with you. I know your mother has good intentions, and I appreciate that she insists I rest.”

You tilt your head up at him, silently asking if he will continue.

Kiyoomi, unbeknownst to you, is facing an internal battle with himself. Years of being in war and surrounded by men who believe vulnerability is weakness often leaves him staying quiet in moments where he wishes to speak. He mulls over what he wants to say again, wondering if you’d laugh him off and tell him to not be silly. But he knows that you sense something is up, your eyes taking on a glimmer of understanding and kindness before you look down at your plate. “I won’t force it out of you, Kiyoomi.”

He looks at you affectionately, but you miss it as you stack the plate on the counter.

“Well, since you’re practically pleading me to share my thoughts, I’ll tell you.”

That makes you laugh. You laugh a gentle little laugh, and Kiyoomi has to turn back and face the dishes so that he doesn’t lose his thoughts.

“Your mother, I… I know she means no harm. I know that she may believe that I need rest and time and some sort of recuperation period. I don’t mean to be rude, but she… it feels as if she is doing worse than good, for me.”

You nearly freeze on the spot, worried about what he’ll say next. You’re scared that you and your mother have ruined his whole stay.

Kiyoomi breathes out your name, “I assure you that I am not a wounded dog that must be left alone to rest and sleep the pain away. I want to live a normal life, now. I’ve faced enough estrangement in the war. Please, allow me to work and live with you just as anyone else would.”

It’s a simple, simple request. A simple request that would have anyone cheering and clapping and showing him to the damaged flowers in the front yard and putting him right to work. It’s a simple request that makes your heart clench and twist in the caverns of your chest, knowing that he wants to live a life of normality and serenity. Knowing that he has opened up to you about being shunned away. It makes you feel trusted, and in a way, sought out.

You’re silent for a beat too long and Kiyoomi looks like he wants to scrub away all the words he just said with the way he resumes at washing his plate. As you set another one to dry, you tell him calmly, to prevent the feeling of pity arising in the air, “Of course, Kiyoomi.”

The corners of his lips twitch up when you tell him the bushes out front need to be trimmed.

You tell your mother of Kiyoomi’s request that same night, and she scoffs and frowns and throws a little fit before she caves. She initially insists that you only give him light work, but eats up her words at the glower you throw her way.

He helps you trim the bushes, the weeds, helps you with the vegetables and the chickens and watches eagerly as you prepare food so that he can take on that task later on.

You stir the soup around in the pot, sprinkling in some herbs and seasonings to add some more flavor. He asks you how much you use, you tell him you just know in your heart when to stop. When the kitchen falls quiet, you pick on him and teasingly ask, And how should you cook? And he answers, suppressing a laugh and an eye roll, With love.

You peer down into the pot.

“Okay. Kiyoomi, I am trusting you to deem it ready. Have a taste. The fate of this dinner falls on you.”

He bites his cheek at your dramatics.

You bring the ladle up to his lips and Kiyoomi has to lean forward a little to meet you halfway. You press the spoon to his lips and he lets the liquid in, his eyes locked on yours as he takes a sip. You feel small in some invigorating, exciting way.

He pulls away to think about the taste. “A little more rosemary.”

You eye him carefully but take his word, dipping the ladle back into the pot and sprinkling in a few more leaves. After a few stirs, you scoop the liquid back into the spoon and hold it up to him again.

He leans forward without being told, almost eager to have you press it to his mouth. Again, he keeps his eyes trained on your face as he has a taste.

When you pull the ladle away, he remains close to you, face inches away from your own.

Your fingers twitch.

“Yes,” He breathes out, your lashes flutter. “It’s ready. Made with love.”

You can’t tell if your mind is playing tricks on you, but he seems to be inching closer and closer, your grip tightening on the end of the ladle as you start freezing up, debating whether or not to shut your eyes.

You watch as his pretty eyes close, and with your heart leaping and palms sweating around the ladle from nervousness and the heat that remains in the small space between you two, you let your eyes slip shut.

You know it– you know it, it’s coming, his lips right against yours, you think you can already taste him—

“I’ve arrived early!”

The both of you jump backwards and the ladle collides with the floor.

“S-Sorry,” You whisper to Kiyoomi, picking up the ladle and tossing it in the sink before grabbing a different one off the kitchen rack. His shoulders sag and you think you hear him sigh, but he composes himself quickly as your mother makes her way into the kitchen.

She sees the two of you in front of the soup pot and beams, missing how stiff the both of you look and how you’re wiping your sweaty hands on your apron.

“Teaching Kiyoomi how to cook? Good! Good good, more men should partake in household chores. I cannot wait to taste how Kiyoomi’s soup comes out, should he cook for us soon.”

He nods curtly, watching as you dip the new ladle into the liquid. You look shaken up, movements jagged and nervous, and he fears he’s done something terribly wrong.

“Did you teach him the most fundamental lesson in cooking, dearie?”

At that, a smile slips onto your face.

“Yes. Cook with love.”

When the three of you eat dinner together, Kiyoomi mulls over the fact that it was made with love. Your love. He wants to eat so much that he feels full of your affections. He wants so much of it that he cannot help but decline anyone else who offers food, because he’ll be full of your love.

You two never bring up the almost-kiss. Kiyoomi is scared that he’s pushed a boundary and you’re scared that you misread the situation– so the two of you remain silent and try to fall back into the familiar pattern of days, the rhythm you two share.

The tension is nearly unbearable when the two of you are less than two feet apart. It almost hurts. It hurts Kiyoomi to look at you so longingly and you never notice. It hurts you when you try to scoot a little closer and all he does is move away. You think it's because he's disgusted with you. He just wants you to feel comfortable.

Days pass and the both of you pack the incident up and back away into the furthest crevice in your minds. Everything seems alright again– you both talk to the chickens, trim the flowers and cook dinner by each other's side.

You’re preparing to cook and pull your apron off the hook rack that’s nailed right by the kitchen entrance. Kiyoomi watches as you slip it on and watches when you huff in frustration as you try to reach behind yourself and tie it off. Your arms start getting sore from the awkward position they've been in, the apron straps unraveling again and again in protest. You’re about to let the damn thing flail loose until you hear Kiyoomi clear his throat behind you.

“Let me help.”

Your cheeks burn.

He delicately takes the straps into his hands, making the base knot against your back and pulling it. “Is that good?”

It’s a little loose.

“Tighter, please.”

He pulls. It’s almost like you’re drawn backward, nearly knocking into his chest. He starts tying up a little bow and you feel the brush of his fingers against the small of your back, shivers running up your spine and shoulders. You have to hold yourself back from twitching.

“There,” He says, taking a step back and admiring his handiwork. He keeps his eyes trained on the bow, tries to hold himself back from drinking in your entire figure.

It’s oddly domestic, intimate. It has you drifting off in thought, has you confirming all your wonders about his touch that had crowded your mind ever since that day when you saw him pull out the vegetables. He is gentle. You can only hope that the softness of his touch is a testament to his feelings (more specifically, his feelings about you).

You cough. You make it awkward. You thank him in a quiet, choked up voice before gathering all the pots needed for dinner before scrambling away to start on the food. Kiyoomi thinks he made you uneasy and this time, stands farther away from you when you show him how to prepare the food. Your heart aches at the same time as his. Both of you are back to square one.

The following days are painfully repetitive. It’s a cycle of the two of you falling back into place, and then your hands brush his, or you catch him staring, or you lean in too close to him, and then the both of you are creating more distance and relapsing into silence and copious amounts of space.

On this particular night, the two of you are sitting far apart, him on the rocking chair with an open book, and you on the other side of the living room, pressed into the far corner of the couch, embroidery hoop in hand.

You could trick yourself into thinking that there’s a sense of peace that blankets the two of you, a scene of quiet comfort and domesticity before there’s a dull knock on the door.

You both freeze. You’re the first one to get up to go check, and Kiyoomi is a little too late in his reaction as he tries to tell you that he’ll get it, a weird sense of protectiveness overcoming him.

The door is already open and the air is knocked out of your lungs.

Before you stands a tall, handsome man, brown hair slightly disheveled, a smile growing as he looks down at you. He is very attractive. But not as charming as Kiyoomi, a voice in your head whispers.

“Well, well, well,” He starts, leaning onto the door frame. “Didn’t know Omi was staying with a pretty little lady.”

“Miya,” You hear from behind you, nearly jumping as your skin burns hot knowing there are two striking men trapping you.

“Ah! My old friend!” The man cheers, his eyes searching yours for approval to step inside. Without any hesitation, you grant him access, slowly backpedaling into Kiyoomi’s chest with a squeak before he moves out of the way, the two of you letting the man inside (much to Kiyoomi’s dismay).

“Miya,” Kiyoomi starts again, gaze hardened. “What are you doing here?”

“Don’t be like that, my good friend,” The man, Miya, repeats. “Hurts when you address me by last name.”

Kiyomi doesn’t retort. He won’t play into the man’s tricks of beating around the bush.

Finally, he fesses up.

“Bo and Shoyo and I are going to meet up at the pub in a bit, thought you’d like to come along.”

You see Kiyoomi make a face.

“I have suffered enough from your presence over the last few years. Please do not try to rope me back into your antics.”

“Omi!” The grown man whines, face falling before he remembers that you’re standing there. Slowly, his face shifts into a wicked smile, and Kiyoomi’s frown deepens.

“Ah ah ah,” He starts, dipping down and leaning in closer as if he’s examining you. “I know why you’re so adamant about staying. Find yourself a pretty little wife?”

The both of you choke.

You’re about to protest, but Kiyoomi is pushing Miya out the door, effectively letting you hide behind the broad expanse of his back, but you peek out from behind him to see what’s happening.

“If I– If I go with you this time, will you swear to not come back?”

“Don’t be like that, Omi.”

“Miya.”

“Just say Atsumu! And fine! I won’t visit after this. Won’t steal your pretty lady away.”

“You are unbearable.”

Your cheeks feel hot as Kiyoomi turns around to face you, face irritated.

“I’ll be on my way. I should be back before it gets too dark out. Please stay safe.”

You give him a meek goodbye as you watch him pull his coat from the rack next to the door and slide it on, watch closely as he threads his arms through the sleeves, watch as the article fits snugly against his form, watch as he again proves that he is a sight for sore eyes.

After you shut and lock the door, you rush to the kitchen window to get a peek at the both of them descending the porch stairs, watch as Atsumu laughs and hangs close to Kiyoomi as the latter tries again and again to maintain the space between them and throws unimpressed looks his way.

When your mother comes home, you tell her Kiyoomi went out with his friends. She smiles and thanks the heavens, happy that he’s finally getting out there. She tells you she hopes he finds someone he may like while he’s out.

You only hum in response.

Hours pass and Kiyoomi is still out. You and your mother have already eaten dinner and she’s already fast asleep. You’re already in your nightgown and tired of waiting around.

You step outside and stand by the chicken coop. You watch them sleep and some of them scatter around and you talk to them as if you’re sending wishes to the universe. Tell them you hope Kiyoomi is okay. Tell them you hope he gets home safe.

As soon as you’re stepping back inside the house, there are drunken laughs and weak knocks at the front door. Not wanting to seem too excited, you take a few deep breaths to pass time before you hear that Miya boy holler out a muffled Pretty lady, come and get him! Which is nearly cut off by a familiar groan. Kiyoomi throws some swear words around.

You open the door and find that the two of them were using it as support as they nearly fall into you. Atsumu catches you before you can trip on your own feet and fall backward.

“Hi,” He breathes out into your face, and you have to hold back from scrunching your nose. He smells of liquor but his steady arms keep you rooted in place, his physique nearly swallowing you whole.

“Hello,” You start, hyper aware of how you look and if you have any blemishes on your face and how close the two of you are, but before you can think of anything else to find a flaw in, Atsumu is pulled back by Kiyoomi.

“Stop terrorizing my host,” Kiyoomi hiccups out, trying his hardest to remain stern and imposing, but his friend only laughs brightly.

Atsumu slurs out your name, “You must know,” He starts, leaning his arm on the door frame, trying to pose coolly. “Omi mentioned you an awful lot tonight. Think he might have taken a—”

“Miya.”

“Yes, my most beloved Omi,” Atsumu professes, cheeks pink and dewy from all the alcohol. “I’ll leave you two be.”

He clumsily spins on his heel, trips on his way down the steps, and crushes another flower bush.

Your eyes flash with pain and Kiyoomi shuts the door before you can see Atsumu trip into anything else. He’s rather good at composing himself, straightening his face and posture as he looks at you.

“Would you like some dinner?”

“Yes, please.”

You find out soon that Kiyoomi is mouthy when he’s drunk. After you reheat what was left over from dinner and slide the plate towards him, he asks that you sit down with him. His face flashes with disappointment when you sit across from him instead of right by his side.

In his drunken state, he spills all that he’s kept inside without you even needing to probe. Tells you he plans to get going soon, has his eye on a place, tells you he's ready to move on and start life from scratch. He tells you he's tired of you avoiding him like the plague, but there's no malice behind his voice– only pure disappointment, like he’s sulking. At that, you perk up and lean forward, guiltily trying to fish some more out of him.

“Hate that you stay so far away,” He grumbles before stuffing his fork in his mouth. “Always jumping and skittering around me like I’m, I’m– frightening. Hate that you think I’m scary.”

He hates that you keep your distance, hates that you've deemed him untouchable, hates that you see him as some warlord man who will crush you beneath the soles of his shoes if you utter something incorrectly.

“Miya,” He suddenly blurts, and for a second you think he thinks you’re the man that just left.

“Miya told me to confess to you.”

Your blood runs cold. Confess…?

Kiyoomi is quiet after that, finishing up his food with sad eyes. He wants more and more and more, any drop of your love that he can get, he will take it.

You don't ask if he means confessing by telling you all that he hates or if he means confessing something else. Something else that has your stomach stirring, heart doing odd twists as your fist the skirt of your dress. It's hard to think about it when he's right in front of you and slurring his words and clumsily pushing his plate away. It's something you must think about later, in the solace of your own room.

When he’s done, you help him shrug off his coat, watch as the expanse of his back reveals himself to you. You guide him to his room, expecting him to close the door as soon as he steps in again, but this time, he turns to face you and leans on the frame. He swallows as he looks over you, eyes droopy and tired, and he looks so vulnerable in this light. He’s loosened up, mouth parted only slightly as he lets his eyes wander where he usually doesn't when sober, lets his mind think what he usually holds back on any other day.

He breathes out your name. You look up at him curiously.

“I wish you could come with me.”

You stiffen. You gently place your hands on his chest and push him back into his room slowly– your touch makes him smile.

“Goodnight, Kiyoomi,” is all you say.

“Goodnight, angel.”

Just like the almost-kiss, neither of you bring up what Kiyoomi said that night. It's an elephant in the room– at least, to you. You’re not sure if Kiyoomi even remembers what he said. (He does).

The two of you delve into another game of dancing around each other in circles, putting on a show that makes it seem like everything's alright and that your hearts don’t ache. Neither of you are aware that when night falls and you're in your respective rooms, the both of you dwell and worry about what you've said and done.

As of late, Kiyoomi hasn't been around. He still helps you with his morning tasks, but after breakfast, he slips out of the house and tells you he will be searching around town for work with his friend Miya. You know that he doesn't owe you any explanations, but some part of you appreciates it.

(Kiyoomi knows this, too. He wants you to know he isn't seeking anyone else out there).

Day in and day out, he's around less and less. You start to think that Kiyoomi is now trying to get rid of his feelings ever since you didn't exactly reciprocate what he said that night, when he was drunk.

One heartbreaking evening, Kiyoomi announces that he’ll be leaving soon over dinner. Your mother has a big smile on her face as she congratulates him and cups his face and cries on and on about how proud she is and that he deserves all the best. You nod along to everything that she says, but your vision blurs and all the twines of your fork blend together and it’s hard to see what you’re eating. It's even harder to hold back your sniffles as she starts asking him where he’ll move and where he’ll be working and if he's met anyone. She's always on his back about that last one. It makes your heart feel bitter and heavy.

The next morning, your mother insists that she go out to the market and get Kiyoomi some farewell gifts. He reassures her that she doesn't really have to, tries to convince her to stay as she's already putting on her coat, and then she's walking out the door.

Kiyoomi asks if you could help him tidy up before he leaves. It’s more of a statement than a question, so you oblige.

You help him take off his sheets and load them into a basket to wash later. You wipe down the dresser and the desk, help sweep the floors, help him fold his clothing neatly so that his suitcase shuts securely.

When everything's done, you wipe your hands nervously on your apron and give him a curt nod, turning to leave the room.

“Stay,” He suddenly blurts, fists clenching at his sides. “I have to tell you something before I go.”

And so you turn and face him, letting your hands fall to your sides. He steps closer to you.

“Before I go,” He starts, eyes scanning your face for any emotion, but he gets nothing. You look numb.

“I don’t expect anything from you in return, but I must tell you, or else I don’t think I can live with myself. You,” He hesitates, feeling like he instead wants to turn away and save it for another day.

The curious glimmer in your eye pulls him back in.

“You have captured my heart,” Kiyoomi says breathlessly, “The entirety of my soul. I have no regrets in opening myself up to you, in letting you in, and I can say that you have made me a better man. I want to be vulnerable with you as I am now, time and time again. I want us to be one, but to be our own all at once.”

His eyes search yours frantically, “I love you.”

Your mouth drops open.

Hands shaky, you try smoothing out your dress and formulating a response, the right response, one that tells him you feel the same.

Kiyoomi begins to lean away, taking a step back, face calm. “As I’ve said, I don’t expect anything from you in return. You can leave, if you wish.”

You stay rooted still.

“Kiyoomi,” You finally squeak, voice cracking like you're on the verge of tears. The tone of it makes him stand up a little straighter, like he's worried about what he's done, but then you're beckoning him forward with your hand.

He comes in closer, approaching you like you’re injured- gentle and calm like he mustn't startle you any further. You try to lean into him, try to pull him closer, hands wrapping around his shirt and bringing him towards yourself, voice shaky as you manage to get out, “And I you.”

It’s all he needs. It’s all he needs before he’s dipping down, lips slotting against your own as you sigh out wantonly. Days and weeks and months of pent up feelings and unspoken words all pour out in one kiss, a kiss that has you stumbling backward and grasping at his shirt, his hands roaming down your back and pulling you into him, closer and closer and closer, like he is going to fuse the two of you together.

(He wants to).

It isn’t long until you find yourself pressed into his bed, both of your clothes thrown into some corner of the room, underwear torn off as he hovers above you, licking into your mouth and grinding against your cunt.

“Kiyoomi,” You whimper once he pulls away. “Please.”

He dips down again to kiss and nip at your chest, the metal of his tags stinging your skin and giving you shivers. Kiyoomi hums into your shoulder, licks a stripe up your neck before lifting himself off the bed, planting his hands on your hips. He drags you closer to him, lifting you up as he drags his cock over your warmth.

“Such a pretty little cunt,” he groans as he slips in, eyes falling shut when you immediately flutter around him. Kiyoomi almost falters, almost curls in on himself and leans atop of you again before he collects himself and starts dragging his cock in and out, hissing at the way you clamp down on him.

It’s a build up, Kiyoomi starting gentle and slow until you’re bucking up your hips and whining at him to go faster, till the only thing you can get out is a weak string of please please please.

Kiyoomi cages you beneath him again as he starts drilling into you, broken cries slipping past your lips as your hands race up and down his back, leaving light scratches that make him moan so prettily right by your ear.

He brings his hands to your thighs, pushing them up and trapping them against your chest and your eyes roll back, body falling pliant to him. He’s so close, all up in your face and humming about how wet you are for him, how fucking good you feel, how you’re made for me, doll, all for me.

His breath fans your face as he thrusts into you desperately, making the bed shake. The tags on his chain bump into your chin, clinking softly like little chimes and bringing you back time and time again as your mind spirals under the feeling of him pounding into you. Kiyoomi grunts and lifts himself up for the fastest second, taking the tags in hand and ripping the chain off his neck, metal grazing the wood floor as it slides away. His irritation with it makes you want to laugh, but the sound gets caught in your throat as his cock hits the sweetest spot in you, making your toes curl as you cry out his name.

He watches you as your hands sneak down, nimble fingers spreading apart your folds to try and get a good look at his length sliding in and out of you. Kiyoomi looks down, watches the spot where the two of you meet, watches as his dick comes out covered in slick before pushing himself back in.

“Fuck, fuck, angel, you’re so– so good, such a good girl for me.”

Your head bobbles up and down in a nod, weakly whimpering out his name, “I want to cum, please let me– let me cum all over you, Kiyoomi!”

He shudders, hand coming up to grab at your jaw. “Look at me. Look at me when you cum.”

You sob out pathetically, legs shaking and twitching as you tighten around him, gushing for what seems like hours until you fall limp, tears invading your vision. Kiyoomi murmurs praises into your cheek before planting both hands on your hips again, using you to reach his high, and you let him, let yourself be his little doll.

You feel his warm seed trickle into you, stomach fluttering at the sensation before he collapses on top of you.

Kiyoomi nestles his face into your chest for a few minutes before rolling onto his side, cupping your cheek with his big hand. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”

You nodded, trying to scoot in closer to him, albeit weakly.

“I love you, Kiyoomi.”

He smiles. He’s beautiful, you think. He opens his mouth to return the affection, your hand coming up to brush his curls away, but there’s a telltale sound at the door that alarms the both of you.

In an instant, you two are up, laughing and tripping over your own feet, Kiyoomi hustling into his slacks as you awkwardly slide your dress back on, thumping into the footboard of the bed as your mother chirps out like a bird, “I’m home!”

“Your mother,” Kiyoomi says in a hushed tone, leaning close to you as he buttons up his shirt, “Always has to go and interrupt us.”

You smile up at him cheekily, and he catches the mischievousness in your eyes.

“Just means that you must take me with you, I presume?”

You step out into the grass of the backyard, the sun already hanging in the sky since you’re a little bit late to your task. Nonetheless, you head straight towards the chicken coop and unfasten the doors, the chickens pouring out and clucking around obnoxiously, as they always have. The rest is muscle memory– throw out the old water, replace it, add in fresh food, sit with the chickens. The familiarity of it all soothes you– not that you need soothing. You simply feel in touch with your roots again.

“Good morning, Harold.” You jeer at one particular chicken, who eyes you warily. You laugh. “Now don’t be jealous, I’ll always come back to check on you.”

He gives an approving cluck.

You gather yourself and get back up, slipping off your boots on the back porch. As you approach the dutch door, you see someone already leaning onto the bottom half of it, a little bouquet in hand.

“He told me to give this to you,” Your mother swoons, holding out the bundle of flowers to you. A laugh bubbles at your lips as you observe the flowers, holding the stems together, “Aren’t these from the front yard? Such a romantic,” You joke, rolling your eyes as you make your way inside. You tuck the flowers into one of your mother’s vases to keep them safe.

“I’ll get started on breakfast,” You call out, despite it already being later in the day and, technically, lunch time would be rolling around.

“Oh no no,” You mother gasps, a sound that you had become all too familiar with when Kiyoomi was around, when she’d clutch her chest in shock.

“You rest, my dear, I’ll start working on the food.”

“Mother,” You press, “You need to go rest. That’s the exact reason why we came over here!”

“Nonsense!” She chimes, pushing you down to sit at the dining table as she pads over to the kitchen. You remain still for a few moments to appease her, but then the front door creaks open and you’re on your feet immediately.

“Hi lover,” You say almost bashfully as Kiyoomi approaches you, wiping the sweat off his forehead as he sinks down to kiss your forehead, your chin, your lips.

“Hi, my little doll,” he mutters against you before pulling away. “Did you like the flowers I got you?”

You laugh, observing the green and brown stains on his white undershirt, evidence of his hard work in the front yard. “I shouldn’t be praising a thief, seeing as you took my mother’s flowers right from her yard.”

“Oh?” He suddenly challenges, “I think this thief deserves a little praise, seeing as I successfully made your heart mine.”

You can’t help but scoff, tongue poking at your cheek with how embarrassing he is, how corny he’s become now that he’s in love.

Your mother scurries back in with two plates in hand, telling you both to Sit, sit! like dogs, and Kiyoomi looks at you with a knowing smile on his face. Always interrupting things.

As the three of you start eating, your mother points her fork accusingly at you.

“And you, my sweet girl, better eat up. You need more nutrients for when a baby is on the way.”

You choke. Kiyoomi smiles into his cup as he takes a sip.

“We’re not expecting,” You scold, stabbing your fork into your food. “You can’t just say things like that, mother—”

“How come? You never know! With the two of you in that new big home, you’ll surely want to fill in some space. You’re young! There’s no shame!”

“You’re the one who may as well fill up the space, visiting nearly every day!”

“Oh honey, I’m just excited for you—”

The bickering is all in good fun, Kiyoomi knows. He takes your hand into his underneath the table, finger brushing against the golden band that encompasses your own.

Yes, he thinks to himself, heart swelling. Perhaps it’s time to start filling up the space.

#sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #kiyoomi x reader #sakusa smut #sakusa kiyoomi smut #hq x reader #hq smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu smut #sakusa fluff

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puranami · 5 months

Text

✿ Fever - 1 ✿

A/N: Not included Brook and Jimbei bc I have absolutely no idea how to write them. Also, since Chopper is baby it would feel weird including him, even though it'd be in a purely platonic way. Just because of all the pining going on. Idk, I'd rather keep the themes separate, if that makes sense?

Summary: You're sick and try to ignore it.

Characters: Luffy, Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Robin, Franky.

Content: SFW, G/N reader, no serious illness but Usopp's is a liiiiittle angsty bc of his mum, not proofread (effectively) bc it's past 2am ✿

(Part 2)

Luffy

✿ He's honestly oblivious to things at first. You are doing your best to maintain your usual level of enthusiasm but it's so exhausting, and that's the most he registers - that you're tired.

"Hey, did ya not sleep too good?" he asked, entirely too loud for the headache beginning to form. You groan and lean your head into your hand, as if that would somehow soothe things, but to no avail. "Don't worry about it, I swear it won't affect my duties," you say, not sure who you were trying to convince. Apparently it didn't work regardless, as when you looked at him he was just stood there frowning with his arms crossed, and his head tilted. Before you could say anything you were greeted with a rubbery palm lightly smacking against your forehead, earning a surprised yelp from you. "You're hot." "Luffy!" Of course he had to say it that way. If you weren't already burning up with this fever, that would've set your skin ablaze. He really had no filter, and he never realised how the things he said affected you. He removed his hand from your face to grab your own, turning to drag you back to your quarters, not listening to any of your protests on the matter. There really wasn't anything you could do once Luffy had made up his mind, and you'd be lying if you said it wasn't part of his charm. "No duties for you today, 'kay?" It may have been phrased like a question, but you knew it was 'Captain's orders.'

✿ You'd end up sleeping most of the day, with Luffy having gotten Chopper to look after you.

✿What you wouldn't be aware of was his constant presence while you slept, keeping a quiet vigil whilst he made sure the damp cloth on your head was always nice and cool.

✿ He just wants you to get better as fast as you can!

Zoro

✿ One word; clueless.

✿ It just looks like a hangover to him, what with the way you groan at the light, are unsteady on your feet, and complain about being nauseous.

"And I thought I drank a lot last night." he'd comment with a smirk. "Shut up, Zoro, you always drink a lot," you whine. "I didn't drink anything!" "The pathetic whining says otherwise." You threw the rag you'd been cleaning with at him. He raised an eyebrow, watching it harmlessly drop to the floor in front of him. "Your form is off." This man, you swear! You try to growl out an insult, but it dies on your tongue, a wave of nausea hitting in it's place, causing you to clasp a hand to your mouth. "Alright, easy champ, no need to strain yourself," Zoro raised his hands in faux surrender. "Come on, you gotta sleep this one off." He can't help but smile as you pathetically smack at him while he picks you up, opting for bridal style as opposed to flour sack, only so you don't empty your guts down his back. Saying that, he'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy holding you like that, though you're far too busy trying to fight him to notice the dusting of pink on his cheeks. "Don't worry I'll get you through this. I know my way around a hangover." "I'm not hungover," you protest as he gently places you in a hammock.

✿ True to his word though, he does see you through it, even if 'it' is the wrong thing. Task failed successfully!

✿ Zoro stays beside you, makes sure you drink plenty of water, and get plenty of rest, even falling asleep himself at one point; his face inches from yours as he was leaning against the post the top end of the hammock was attached to at the time.

✿ Sadly you never saw that as you slept right through it. Would've been good ammunition to use against him when he needed taking down a peg.

Nami

✿ One of the people who would actually do a good job of looking after you. She's not got the gentlest bedside manner; she is firm yet fair, so you're in good hands.

When you don't join the crew for breakfast, Nami took it upon herself to make sure you hadn't gotten tangled in your hammock, or something equally as stupid. You wake up in a cold sweat when you hear your door open, and manage to croak out, "Nami? Oh, did I oversleep?" When you try to get up, she pushes you right back down. "Don't." Her tone indicates that she will not tolerate any shenanigans, and so you do as you're told. "You need to sleep more. I'll get you some water, and later Sanji will make you some soup." She tucks a thin blanket around you, so you don't overheat. "If you so much as try to get out of this hammock I'm going to tie your arms and legs together. Understood?" Unable to stop yourself, you let out a light chuckle. "Nami, you're so cute when you pretend not to care," the fever disabling any kind of filter you may have had. While it did catch her by surprise, you are none the wiser, as you quickly drift back off to sleep. Nami has to take a brief moment to collect herself again, silently cursing the noticeable warmth in her cheeks, then mumbling about how you're an idiot before leaving your room.

✿ Nami basically dictates how your day is. Lots of sleep, plenty of fluids and maybe a warm bath to help sweat this out, and of course she 'requests' (demands) Sanji make a hearty soup to help you get better, which he is more than happy to do for her!

✿ She'll deny it, but she sets up in your room so she can monitor you throughout the day, only going to Chopper for medicine if she thinks it's bad enough, deciding it isn't necessary to bother him with something so manageable.

Usopp

✿ He panics. Something about seeing someone he cares about getting sick makes him think of his mother, and he doesn't want to lose anyone else like that.

Usopp scoops you up and books it to Chopper. You've seen him afraid, but nothing this intense, and no matter how much you try to convince him that you're okay, and that it's just a cold - you can't seem to break through to him. "Chopper, please help! Please!" He begs as he gently places you on a bed. Tears are streaming down his face, as he takes your hand in a vice-like grip. Once Chopper confirms what you already tried to tell him about it being a common cold, he relaxes a bit. You don't hold it against him, clearly this is something deeper for him. Chopper's words, those of a professional, were very reassuring. "You just need rest, but I do have medicine to help with symptoms if you need," he says before putting a comforting little hoof on Usopp's knee. "Everything will be okay, I promise." Usopp takes a moment to collect himself before quietly saying, "Can I stay?" You and Chopper look at each other before smiling back at him, letting him know he is welcome to stay as long as he likes, or in this case needs. Neither of you press him on why this had him so scared, figuring he'll tell you if and when he's ready to.

✿ Chopper will handle all of your care, because Usopp refuses to leave your side.

✿ He keeps you entertained with his stories when you're awake, and scribbles on some loose papers Chopper gives him while you sleep. It's mainly ideas for things to make, and it keeps him calm.

✿ At one point he falls asleep with his arms crossed on the bed beside you, his little fingers linked with your own, like an unspoken promise that you'll get better, and he'll be there when you do.

Sanji

✿ As soon as Sanji catches on that you are sick, he decides to completely dedicate himself to your care and recovery! He's very attentive, and will do every little thing you want or need to get you back to health.

"Darling, I insist!" Every 'it's okay,' and 'you don't need to do all that for me,' will be shot down immediately. "What kind of man would I be if I let someone as lovely as you do anything in this condition?" He clutches his chest dramatically. "No, no. Don't you worry about a thing; I'll make sure you're well again in no time at all." You really don't have the energy to try and dissuade him, so you accept your fate, and let him dote on you the whole day. It's honestly really nice; you love having his attention, and are thankful that the fever hides your blushes, but you also can't help feeling a little guilty with how much he does for you. "Please don't overexert yourself on my behalf, I don't want you to end up getting sick yourself." "Even if I was sick, it wouldn't stop me from looking after you, my dear." You can't help but frown at this. He's so eager to do for others, but is painfully stubborn about receiving that same care. "If you're ever sick, Sanji, I'm gonna do everything that you've done for me - and I won't hear any objection from you on the matter!" You say in as stern a voice as you can manage with a sore throat. "Darling-" "Nope!" You cut him off quickly, "You deserve the same level of care that you give out!" He looks at you a little wide-eyed, an adorable blush creeping along his face. He lets out a small laugh. As much as he'd like to, he says nothing more on it; you're as stubborn as he is it would seem.

✿ Sanji makes lots of lovely food to help aid in your recovery; warming soups, peppermint tea, porridge with ginger and honey. Everything that soothes and settles, no matter the malady.

✿ His bedside manner is impeccable! He's so gentle with you, and he makes sure to check in as often as he can, whilst still doing his duties, getting as much done as possible while you're asleep.

✿ Like Nami, he only goes to Chopper if he feels your condition requires it. He's confident that his cooking will be more than enough to get you back to health.

Robin

✿ A blessing, and a curse. She's very logical, and she knows how to handle such a minor illness, but, she really can't help telling you all about other illnesses that have worryingly similar symptoms.

"Oh, this one is very unpleasant," she beams, and you can't help but press your hands over your ears. "Chopper!" You cry, before she can start telling you about this particular strain of 'instantdeathitus,' practically running into the infirmary with Robin hot on your heels, holding an open book on diseases. "Robin keeps talking about scary diseases and now I'm scared I'm gonna die!" After being given a quick check-up, and much reassurance that, no, you do not have a rare disease that can only be contracted on a specific island in a completely different ocean, and yes, it is just a common cold, you relax. Mostly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," Robin says later once you have bundled up and settled down. "Your cold just reminded me of this book, and I thought it was fascinating. I just wanted to share it with you." She clearly felt guilty, and you appreciated that this was just how she is, but you really would've rather she'd chosen a different topic to tell you about. "Maybe, you have a book on old remedies you could tell me about instead?" Robin perks back up at this. She truly values how much you understand her, and she can see why talking about diseases when your ill is not the most pleasant experience, so this is a perfect compromise. "That's a wonderful idea," she smiles, and you swear she puts the sun to shame with how bright her smile is. "There might be one we can try that will help with your recovery."

✿ Once you get past the scary disease hiccup, Robin is a great companion, looking up home remedies, and trying out the ones that are clearly based on logic as opposed to superstition.

✿ If you find a good remedy, she's excitedly write it down, and later pass the information on to Chopper.

✿ She's happy to get you water when needed, and will watch over you as you nap in the library. It's one of the quietest parts of the ship, so there is no way to disturb you there.

Franky

✿ Aside from Chopper, Franky is genuinely the best at dealing with sick people. He tones down his behaviour, and knows exactly what you need to get back on your feet.

Your head was absolutely thundering, at least that's how it felt. Franky clocked onto your condition as soon as he saw you enter the kitchen, and once you had what you came in for, he hurried you off to his workshop. You thought it was an odd choice. "Shouldn't I go somewhere quiet?" "I know it doesn't seem it, but I can keep this place absolutely silent if I need to. No music, no one else barging in and making a racket," he said, keeping his voice uncharacteristically quiet. "Also the walls are soundproof - keeps noise out just as well as it keeps my noise in." "Oh! That's really impressive," even when ill, there is a sparkle in your eyes when he tells you about pretty much anything he's designed or built. You notice his cheeks turning red, but assume that it's just from the compliment as he looked so proud when you gave it to him. "That's not all," he grins, "I've been working on a lil something, and now's the perfect time to show you!" That certainly piqued your interest, and he was doing a great job at distracting you from how bad you felt. Franky led you to one of the corners of the room, one that was covered in a large tarp. You'd seen it many times, and you were always curious, but he'd always brushed it off whenever you brought it up, so the thought of finally seeing what was under there was exciting! Pulling down the tarp revealed a little alcove that was almost like a nest considering the amount of cushions. "It's a space for you," he said sheepishly, "so you have somewhere comfortable to sit when you hang out in here. I figured you could rest there whilst you're ill, and I can look out for you." You stared at it in absolute wonder, big shining eyes darting between it and him. "It's absolutely perfect, thank you so much!"

✿ Franky kept the workshop quiet like he said he would, and whenever you needed anything, like water or medicine, he'd go and get it for you.

✿ At some point Chopper came in to check on you, since Franky had mentioned you were ill, but there really wasn't much to do about it besides getting lots of rest, and you had that covered.

✿ He'd work on his quiet projects, the ones still in the planning and design stages, whilst you slept peacefully in your cosy nest.

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aajxs · 9 months

Text

middle of the night , a.s

synopsis - the one where anakin got so crossfaded at a party one night that he had to text you to take him back to the apartment he shared with your older brother, but somehow ended up at yours.

pairings - anakin skywalker x fem!reader (modern au)

warnings - mentions of alcohol and weed use , anakin being a hater , protective anakin , kinda possessive anakin , mentions ani having naughty thoughts , whiny anakin , cute til it AINT , inexperienced reader , titty sucking , oral (f receiving) , praise kink and degradation kink , fingering , p in v sex , kinda clothed sex?? (anakin doesn't take his pants off all the way) , poorly written smut

w/c - 5.9k (WOW.)

a/n - negl I got sloppy af at the end cuz idk how to properly write smut!!! this is an alternate ending to a prompt in my bbf!anakin post. also for my sake please ignore any spelling or punctuation errors lmfao. anyways, enjoy! <33

masterlist .

You had just gotten out of the shower, still wrapped in a towel, when your phone vibrated from its spot on your bed. You didn't bother looking, assuming it was someone posting to their story or a notification from a dumb game you downloaded and haven't played before (yet still wouldn't delete it.)

You dried off then got dressed, slipping into a black tank top and a pair of shorts. Your phone vibrated a few more times, so you grabbed it as you made your way back into your bathroom to brush your teeth. All of the notifications were from Anakin, who rarely texted you. You unlocked your phone and read all of the texts, a few consisting of a bunch of gibberish and another that had an almost fully readable text.

'csn you come oick me up? ill sendn yoy my location' It read, making you let out a small laugh as you brushed your teeth. Anakin obviously wasn't sober, you could tell because on the rare occasion that he did text you, it was nowhere close to like this. You then got a notification, that being his live location. He was serious?

He was about ten minutes away, but with it being night and there being few cars on the road, you could get there in five. If you were an experienced driver, that is. Anakin knew that you weren't a very good driver, he had been in your car with you driving it enough times to know. Yet he still decided to text you instead of your brother, who's literally his roommate.

You texted him back, telling him that you'd be there in ten minutes before shoving your phone into your pocket. You quickly finished brushing your teeth then rushed around your apartment. You grabbed your keys, your wallet just in case, and bottle of water from your fridge for Anakin, then put on some slippers and exited your apartment.

Your phone vibrated in your pocket, making you grab it and read whatever Anakin had sent you this time. It read, 'pelase hurry therws a rsndom girl grindikg on me right jow'. You smiled at his bluntness before rushing down to your car, texting him a quick 'omw rn ani' as you started your car and began driving to Anakin's location.

It didn't surprise you as much as it should have that Anakin texted you, there was obviously a reason, and most were guessable. He probably knew your brother was asleep and didn't want to burden him, and as someone who has had to live with your older brother for years, you knew that he probably would have gone back to bed and forgot about Anakin.

You never expected brother's best friend would be texting you and asking you to come pick him up from a random party. Although, Anakin has contacted you on worse terms.

Anakin didn't know why he texted you of all people, but for some odd reason it felt so right. Although you're his best friends little sister, he never really thought of you as a friend or sister figure. Anakin always thought you were cute, and you were just the sibling of one of his friends. He had plenty of friends with little sisters and brothers, so why were you so different?

Maybe it was because you were the sibling of his best friend, not just one of his friends that he only talked to on campus. Maybe it was because you actually talked to him and payed attention to him, and you guys were somewhat friends (seeing as you went through middle and high school together, now college).

Anakin never really paid attention to you throughout middle school or the beginning of high school. He saw you basically every day when he would hang out with your brother, stayed the night at your house more times than he can count, and never had any weird or inappropriate thoughts about you. But when you started... developing, you were pretty hard to ignore.

To Anakin's hormonal teenage mind, developing was the only word he could use to describe you. Anakin had always seen and treated you like a child, so why was he suddenly having these filthy thoughts about you? He never acted on them, he would have been too guilty to ever face you again if he did. The biggest problem Anakin had with his thoughts was knowing that he wasn't the only one thinking of you that way.

Anakin had the privilege of being your older brothers closest, most trustworthy friend. Anytime you wanted to introduce a new boyfriend to your brother, he brought along Anakin. "Me and Anakin were hanging out already so I decided to bring him with me, hope that's alright." Most of the time that actually was the case, but Anakin soon found out that your brother just needed a secondhand opinion.

Anakin didn't think the way the guy looked at you was appropriate? Your brother took it into consideration. Anakin thought he was sketchy? Your brother would hear all about it. Anakin thought he was a bad influence? Your brother was convincing you to break up with the guy. Sometimes Anakin said nice things, then proceeded to spread a fake rumor about the guy just so it would get to you and your brother.

On top of that, Anakin started getting more protective over you. For example; Anakin stayed the night one weekend and him and your brother decided to drive up to the store and buy some snacks because there were none for them to eat. Your brother knew you were staying up late to study for an upcoming test, and asked Anakin if it was alright if you go too, assuming you needed a break. Anakin shrugged and your brother knocked before he opened your door.

You were wearing headphones so you hadn't heard him say your name the first time, so your brother walked up behind you and tapped your shoulder, making you take them off and turn to look at you. "N/N, me and Anakin are gonna go get some snacks. You need a break, so you're gonna go with us." You gave him a nod before locking eyes with Anakin, who was leaning against your doorframe. You looked away as you got out of the office chair that you were sitting in to grab your slippers and phone.

When you were at the store, your brother had wandered off to find a certain snack, leaving you and Anakin alone. You were trying to figure out which Doritos flavor you wanted, and Anakin was observing you as you contemplated. It felt like he blinked and suddenly you were getting talked to by a random guy. You looked uncomfortable, looking around for a moment until your eyes landed on Anakin, who was glaring at the guy.

"Excuse me, I think my boyfriend just said my name." You awkwardly said as you stepped towards Anakin. His eyes practically lit up at the word boyfriend, but decided to brush it off and play the part for your sake. Anakin gave him a small smile before placing his hand on the small of your back, slightly worried that if he put his hand anywhere else he would go crazy. When you both turned around, your brother turned the corner with a couple snacks and three drinks, and Anakin gave him a look before glancing at the guy who was about two meters away.

Your brother was trying to figure out why Anakin was touching you, but before he could say something he put two and two together and brushed it off. He walked towards you both and handed you your drinks before gripping your shoulder, walking on the other side of you. When the three of you walked past the man, he muttered something under his breath that you couldn't hear.

Obviously Anakin and your brother heard what he said, or else they wouldn't have turned their heads in sync. "What the fuck did you just say?" Your brother said, the hand on your shoulder tightening just slightly. "I called her a slut." The guy said louder. Needless to say, you all got kicked out because Anakin decided to punch the guy. You guys ended up getting take-out.

To put it plainly, Anakin didn't exactly like seeing you with other guys, and hated it when he heard anybody call you anything less than perfect. Another problem, was that Anakin knew exactly why.

The reason you were so different, the reason he defended you so often, and the reason he texted you, was because Anakin Skywalker was in love with you.

You had been waiting outside for a good five minutes before there was a knock on the window of your car. You let out a breath and unlocked the door. When you assumed Anakin wasn't sober, you didn't think it would be this bad. As soon as he opened the door to your car and sat down, you could smell the alcohol and weed on him.

"Anakin you actually stink—" You said, resisting the urge to cover your nose at the smell. "I'll take off my shirt?" He offered before beginning to take off the black t-shirt he was wearing. Even under the influence he was still a sweetheart to you. "No- No, Ani it's fine, I'll just roll down the windows." You said, placing your hand on Anakin's chest to halt his movements as you started driving. You rolled down both of your windows slightly.

There was music quietly playing, and as Anakin reached to turn it up, you swatted his hand. "Rude.." He mumbled before folding his arms across his chest. "Why did you text me, Ani?" You asked, not taking your eyes off the road, "Because I knew you would be a good girl and not say a thing about this." He slightly slurred. You felt yourself shudder at Anakin calling you a 'good girl'.

You felt his burning gaze, and you so badly wanted to look back at him just to see the look in his bloodshot eyes, but you decided against it. "You don't know that." You said with a curt laugh. "I don't? Really? Because I vividly remember that one time you came to me and-" Anakin started, "What a coincidence! I need gas!" You said, cutting off Anakin and pulling into a gas station.

Anakin let out a huff, "Can I trust you to pump my gas while I go in and pay?" You questioned as you parked the car, glancing at Anakin. "Yes ma'am." He said in a serious manner, making you let out a small laugh. "Half a tank is fine." You said as you both got out the car. Anakin went to grab the gas pump whilst you walked into the sketchy gas station and paid for your gas.

"Thanks!" You smiled as you walked out of the building. Almost as soon as you stepped out of the gas station, you ran into someone. "Oh- I'm sorry," You said, backing up a little and glancing at the person in front of you. "No worries, it's my bad. Sorry if this sounds weird, but you're really pretty." He said, looking you up and down, his eyes lingering on your cleavage for a second too long.

You glanced over at your car to see Anakin leaning against it with crossed arms, staring right back at you. "Thank you so much, I appreciate it!" You grinned, "Can I have your number?" He asked bluntly, "Oh, I don't think.." You started, but you were cut off at the shout of your name. You looked over and Anakin was now glaring daggers at the guy in front of you. "I don't think that'll be necessary, thank you though!" You said with a soft smile as you made your way back to your car.

"Under better circumstances I would have thanked you for that, Ani." You said with a sarcastic smile as you both got back into the car. "Oh! I almost forgot that I brought you a water." You said as you grabbed the slightly cold water from the cupholder and handed it to him. "Thanks, you're an angel." Anakin said as he placed a hand on your thigh and gave it a light squeeze as he grabbed the water and chugged at least half of it.

You wanted to give him a reaction, but decided to keep driving and ignore it. He wasn't sober, so he most definitely wasn't thinking straight. "Can we go to your place instead? Its closer." Anakin said almost out of nowhere. "Why would you want to go to my place? You don't live with me?" You asked, glancing at him to see him already looking at you. "Because yours is closer." He said with a tinge of playfulness in his voice.

"But-" You began, "Please?" Anakin said with the smallest whine. Curse him and his dumb pretty voice. "I-" You hesitated, and the look in Anakin's eyes wasn't making this any easier for you. "Okay." You sighed, as you turned the car to the street your apartment complex was on. "But ill have you know that you are not staying the night, just until you're sober enough." You said as you parked your car in your usual parking spot. Anakin let out a breath, content with your answer.

You lived on the fifth floor of the complex, and the elevator just so happened to be out of order, so it was a hassle getting an unbalanced Anakin up the stairs to your apartment. From an outside point of view, it probably looked like both of you were high. Anakin kept cracking jokes, and every time you laughed he added onto it to make you laugh even harder. So by the time you were at the top of the stairwell, you were out of breath from both the laughing and the walking.

"Anakin that's the wrong way," You laughed as Anakin walked towards the wrong door. You heard him mumble a few curse words before turning around and making his way back towards you. You unlocked the door to your apartment and walked inside, allowing Anakin to shut and lock the door behind him. "Cozy." Anakin said as he walked into your room and plopped down onto your bed. "Excuse you-"

"Y/N," Anakin cut you off as he kicked off his shoes, you hummed in response. "Do you remember last summer?" He asked, watching intently as you make your way throughout your room. "What about it?" You said, your voice turning a bit soft at the thought. You sat on your bed, leaning against the headboard with your legs crossed. "You remember how I went on vacation with your family?" Anakin said, rolling over to lay on his stomach to look at you.

"Yes.. where are you going with this Ani?" You said, tilting your head at the man in front of you. "Just- listen. You remember that guy you met at the beach, right? And you remember why I ended up beating the shit out of him the day before we left?" Anakin said as his blue eyes bored into your E/C ones. "No, nobody ever ended up telling me why." You said with a laugh as you gazed back at Anakin. "Do you want to know why?" He asked with a small smile, "Quit teasing, I wouldn't have said anything if I didn't want to know!" You said, extending your leg to kick his shoulder. "Full story, or just a quick summary?" Anakin joked. He knew you, he knew that you wanted the full story. You scoffed at his words and looked at him expectantly.

"I don't remember why, but we ended up walking with each other along the beach while you and your brother were playing around in the water not too far away. We had been talking about.. you, and then he brought me up. He asked what I was to you," Anakin explained, his brows scrunching every few words. "I told him, 'I'm just her older brothers best friend. Sometimes she likes me, sometimes she doesn't'." He said as he ran his hand along your bare calf. You scoffed, "That is such a lie! At first I didn't like you that much, but I always thought of you as a friend!" You said, Anakin frowned slightly at your words.

"Anyways- He said, 'Then you wouldn't mind if I bent her over in that pretty little two piece and fucked her?'. I stopped walking and looked at him. He didn't even notice I paused until I turned him around and punched him in the face," Anakin said with a small, prideful smile. "You wanna know what he said after I hit him a few times? He said, 'I guess you would mind, wouldn't you?'." Anakin said with a curt laugh. "Would you have minded?" You asked sincerely, making Anakin look at you from his spot on the bed. "Do you want the truth?" Anakin asked, tilting his head a bit. You bit your lip and nodded at him, signaling for him to keep talking.

"Yes, I would have." Anakin said as he sat up. "I never told your brother that story, you know? The only person who knows why is the guy." You laughed at his words. "I'm gonna go get a bottle of water, do you want one?" You said, as you got up from your bed, he nodded as you ruffled his hair and walked out of your room. When you left, Anakin was finally able to let out the breath he'd been unconsciously holding in. Your home smelled so much like you, and that scent made Anakin want to go absolutely feral.

Anakin adjusted his position on your bed, now laying down on his side whilst facing the door. "You made yourself comfy." You grinned as you walked back into the room, handing Anakin his water as you took a couple drinks of yours. "Thanks." He muttered as he took a drink of the water. You sat down, your back now against the backboard of your bed. "You still smell like weed." You mumbled as you gave Anakin a soft smile. Anakin didn't smile back, he just looked at you. His once bloodshot eyes were now their usual blue.

One thing you had always noticed about Anakin, was how intense his gaze was. He held eye contact like it would be his last time ever making it, and it made him all the more attractive. Not only was Anakin's stare intense, he was too. If he wasn't a long time friend of yours, you probably would've been scared of him. You had always had a subtle crush on Anakin, but him being your brothers friend always made it rather hard to show your attraction. Anakin was making you nervous with only his eyes.

You cleared your throat, "Why would you have cared?" You asked as you played with the drawstrings on your shorts. "You are so... Is it not obvious by now?" Anakin said as he grabbed your wrist, then sitting up and copying your position. You let out a small gasp, your mouth parting slightly. Anakin saw a chance, and he took it. He leaned in and your lips connected, catching you by surprise. You kissed him back for a moment before realizing that Anakin might've not been sober.

Almost out of instinct, you pulled away. Anakin leaned towards you more, seemingly chasing your lips. You placed a hand on his rock hard chest and softly pushed him away. "Ani.." You muttered, giving him a nervous smile. "Anakin you're not-" You began, but he quickly cut you off. "Y/N, I've been sober for the past twenty minutes. Please just let me taste you." He pleaded lightly, making you curse under your breath before smashing your lips back against his, careful not to hit his teeth with yours.

Anakin put his hands on your hips and moved you on top of him so that you were straddling him, catching you by surprise. Your lips parted and Anakin took this as an invitation, shoving his tongue into your mouth.

One part of you wanted to pull away and tell him how wrong this was, tell him that this was a bad decision and that he needs to go home. The other part of you knows how good this is making you feel, and you can't seem to stop.

Anakin cupped your face with one hand and tugged at your top with the other. He pulled away slightly, a thin string of saliva going with him. "Can I touch you?" Anakin asked, the hand that was once tugging at your shirt now resting on your waist. "Please," You pleaded as you went to kiss him again. He let out a breathy chuckle and sloppily attached his wet lips to yours.

Anakin's hot tongue in your mouth and his wandering hands were getting you all different kinds of worked up. His rough hand made its way up your shirt. You squirmed at both the foreign feeling and how cold his hands were. His hand reached your left breast, and he gave it a light squeeze. "Take your shirt off." Anakin breathily demanded as he pulled away from the kiss. You stared at him for a moment, obviously hesitant to show yourself to him. "You don't have to-" He started before you abruptly stopped him. You took his free hand and covered his eyes with it, "Don't look." You muttered as you took your hand away from his.

You took your tank top off before self-consciously attempting to cover yourself with your arms. Anakin has seen your body multiple times, just in a less.. inappropriate manner. You didn't know if you really wanted him to see you uncovered fully. You gave him a look when he peeked slightly. He saw that you noticed, and decided to take his hand away from his face and reach towards you.

"Ani.." You muttered, your face heating up as Anakin rubbed your arm. He opened his mouth to speak, but right before any words could come out you adjusted your position on his lap, making him let out a moan instead. That has to be the sexiest thing you've heard in your entire life. "Don't use that nickname on me while we're like this." He mumbled, slightly embarrassed at the noise he just let slip. You could feel his hard straining against his sweatpants, poking right at your clothed, throbbing core.

"I took off my shirt, that means you have to take off yours." You hummed, though your voice came out more demanding than expected. Anakin stopped rubbing your arm and took off his shirt in one swift motion before tossing it to the side. Anakin was fit, he always had been. This just made him all the more attractive to you. You wanted to touch him, too, but you were self conscious and didn't want to uncover yourself.

Your thoughts were interrupted by Anakin touching your arm, "Can i?" He asked, referring to the arms you had tightly wrapped around yourself. You looked at him for a few moments before nodding slowly. You loosened your hold around yourself, as if that would've stopped him anyway. Anakin took your hands and moved them down to his toned chest, being sure to run them across his toned abs and v-line.

You could feel yourself heating up at the action, seeing as you had never touched anybody in such a way before. You completely ignored the fact that Anakin was definitely staring at your tits right now, but you couldn't find it in you to care. All you could focus on was what was gonna happen in a few moments, and how you were gonna keep this from your older brother.

Anakin leaned forward and attached his lips to your neck, sucking and licking at random spots. "Don't worry about your brother, if he finds out I'll take care of it." Anakin muttered into your neck. "Okay," You gasped as Anakin softly bit down on your shoulder.

You were even more surprised when Anakin decided to trail down to your breasts and take one into his mouth. He wrapped an arm tightly around your waist and secured you in place, then used his free hand to fondle your other boob.

The small moans you let out were like music to Anakin's ears, and if it were up to him he would bust then and there at the sound of you. He took your breast out of his mouth and planted a kiss on your nipple, then did the same to your other. "Such pretty tits.." He mumbled into the skin between your breasts. "All mine, y' hear me? All mine." Anakin said as he flipped you over and pinned you to the mattress, making you let out a yelp.

Anakin kissed and licked at your torso, sucking on the skin as he worked his way down. He inched closer to the waistband of your shorts at an excruciatingly slow pace, making the knot in your tighten more and more. "Ani, please just touch me already!" You pleaded, making him look up at you through his lashes. "Touch you where, sweet girl?" He teased as he tugged at your waistband, making you rub your legs together. "You know where," You whined as you ran your hands through Anakin's already tangled hair.

He cursed under his breath before pulling down your shorts. Saying you were wet would be an understatement. "You always get this wet when a man touches you, or am I special?" Anakin said as he ran two fingers down the cloth, making you let out a loud moan at the contact. "I-I've never had.." You trailed off, closing your legs and covering your body out of embarrassment. Anakin let out a hum, "I guess I'm special, then." He grinned as he placed his hands on your thighs and parted them for himself once again.

"Can practically smell you baby," He groaned as he literally ripped the panties from your body. "Those were expensive!" You whined as he tossed them to the side. "Such a pretty pussy, all wet jus' for me.." Anakin muttered as he ran a few fingers along your sopping cunt. "Anakin!" You moaned in an irritated voice, still upset that he ripped one of your favorite pairs of underwear. "Fuck- I'll buy you a new pair, whatever you want." He said whilst grabbing your legs and throwing them over his shoulders, giving him perfect access.

Anakin placed a soft kiss on your pussy before licking up from your throbbing hole to your sensitive bud. You let out a whimper at his actions, "Taste so sweet," He mumbled before he practically attacked your cunt, licking and slurping up all your juices like a man starved.

That unfamiliar knot in your stomach grew tighter and tighter with every moan you let out. "An– Anakin!" You loudly moaned without a care in the world. He hummed into your pussy, knowing you had to be getting close. You started babbling nonsense as you roughly grabbed Anakin's long hair and shoved his face further in between your legs.

"Think 'm gonna—" You started before cutting yourself off with the most beautiful moan Anakin's ever heard. Although you were twitching and jolting against him, Anakin didn't stop his advances and even shoved two fingers inside you. Your back was arched off of your bed, Anakin's face and fingers were buried deep in your cunt, and your sheets were most definitely not coming back from this.

Your hips jolted and grinded against his face in a useless attempt to get him further into you, not caring at all if he was suffocating between your legs. Your moans slowly got more drawn out and louder, signalling that you were about to cum again.

Anakin knew you were probably overstimulated but all he could think about was how good you taste on his tongue and how much he wants to stuff you full of his cum. After wetting Anakin's face even more for the second time, he stopped eating you out for your own good. He could probably go all day if you wanted him to.

He wiped his face off with his hand, being sure to lick anything excess off of his skin before wrapping your legs around his waist and giving you a sloppy kiss. "You taste so good." Anakin quietly said into your mouth. You couldn't tell if he was talking about your mouth or your pussy.

"Wan' you inside me, Ani." You whimpered as Anakin placed more kisses along your jawline, "Might be too big for you baby, not sure if you could take me." He muttered into your neck, a cocky smile on his face. "I can take you. Promise I can— Jus' want you in me.." You said, as you brought your hand to his crotch. Though before you could touch the tent on his sweatpants, he grabbed your wrist and pinned both your hands behind your head.

Anakin gave you a boyish grin, making you pout slightly. "Gonna have to warm you up first." He said as he let go of your wrists and brought a hand to your hip, seemingly holding you in place. He brought his other hand back down to your throbbing pussy, and inserted two fingers.

You moaned at this action, surprised that he didn't even try to see how you reacted to one. You're a virgin, that much is obvious. You've probably never been touched in such a way by another person, and even if you have you probably declined any advances because you were scared of losing your dignity. From the way you react to his fingers, you've probably touched yourself a few times before, you just weren't used to hands his size. Needless to say, you were everything Anakin assumed you would be. Your innocence is turning him on a bit too much.

Anakin started off slowly, he'd already made you cum twice, and he didn't want to overwork you. "A-Ani, faster—" You moaned out as his two fingers popped in and out of you. He gave you a cocky smirk before increasing his pace and harshness. He would come out softly then shove his fingers back into you just to hear the pretty noises you let out when he did. "Anakin, 'm gonna cum!" You moaned, as you bucked your hips into his fingers.

You let out a moan as he put another finger inside you, somehow fitting three of his long fingers inside your tight hole. "C'mon baby, y'know I won't hold you back." Anakin said as he leaned over, whispering his words into your ear. Your eyes slightly rolled back into your head as you came all over his long fingers. "What a slut, all that just over my fingers?" Anakin said as he licked his hands clean of your juices. "You taste so good though." He said as he kissed your cheek.

You whimpered as you rubbed your legs together, giving him a look. "Use your words." He teased, that cocky smile on his face once again. You let out an annoyed hum, "You know what I want!" You were starting to get impatient. "What's the magic word, pretty girl?" He asked, giving you another one of his boyish grins. "Please, Ani." You pleaded, making Anakin smile at you.

He pulled his sweatpants and boxers down to his knees, not caring enough to take them all the way off. His cock practically leaped out of his pants, and the first thought that popped inside your head was 'What the fuck have you gotten yourself into.'

That actually looks heavy. You thought to yourself as you actually got a good look at his dick. Anakin wasted no time grabbing his cock and spreading the precum that was leaking from the tip all over his base as some sort of lubrication. He let out a curse or two as he dragged the tip from your sensitive clit to your dripping hole.

Anakin was definitely not thinking about all the ways he could get you pregnant right now. Definitely not. "Stop teasing and fuck me already, Anakin." You moaned out as you stared at his length. He let out a chuckle, making you look at his face. The moan you let out when he shoved the whole thing inside you was probably the most beautiful thing he's ever heard. Your neighbors are gonna be so mad.

"Can I move?" He asked gently, placing both of his hands on your hips. "Fuck— Y-Yes, please, yes-" You let out as your back arched off the bed. Anakin let out a satisfied hum before slowly moving. He'd pull out, making you feel empty for a few moments and then slowly insert his length back into you, filling you up again.

"Faster, Ani-" You moaned, making him fasten his pace. Your toes were curled and your back was arched and your fingers were harshly digging into your mattress and sheets. He slowly but surely started ramming into you, and after just a few thrusts he had your g-spot memorized.

"Fuck, Ani-" You whined as he paused for a moment to wrap your legs around his waist again. With no words, he immediately began ramming into you again. His thrusts were making your entire room shake and the way your bedframe and backboard hit the wall, you almost felt like it would break any second.

There were tears in your eyes and they were wetting your pillow. For a moment Anakin couldn't tell if you were hurting or if it was pleasure. "'m sorry baby, am I hurtin' you?" He asked as he slowed down his thrusts. "Mmh- no! Keep goin' Ani 'm so close—" You whined out as you gripped his shoulders.

The knot in your stomach was slowly getting tighter and tighter and you knew that any second you could come all over his cock. "Harder, Ani!" You moaned out, making Anakin grin for the hundredth time tonight.

His thrusts started getting sloppier, "Wanna cum inside you, fill you with my babies." Anakin said as he pulled your body down onto him. "Wan' you to fill me up Ani, please!" You whined, the both of you knew that you would probably just buy birth control the next morning.

Before the two of you knew it you were both cumming in sync. Anakin filled you up, and when he pulled out he could see the mix of your juices and his leaking into the sheets. He gently dropped your legs onto the mattress before shuffling back to pull his boxers and sweatpants back up.

You were incredibly tired and your throat hurt from all the moaning and screaming. You looked so pretty like this. Anakin thought as he grabbed his discarded shirt from the floor. You quietly said something about your sheets and Anakin dismissed you. "We can take care of your sheets in the morning baby, but right now I need to clean you up." Anakin muttered as he took his shirt and wiped your wet tears from your face before wiping up the mess you two had made between your legs. He gently wiped you down with his shirt, not caring that it was probably ruined.

"I have towels, Ani." You tiredly said before you muttered an apology for not telling him to grab one instead of his shirt. "It's okay, I don't care if it's you." He said under his breath, assuming his words were a bit too intimate to say loud enough for you to hear. "Y'know, I love you." You muttered before drifting asleep.

"I love you too."

#( 📝 aajxs — written works . )#star wars #anakin skywalker #anakin skywalker x reader #star wars x reader #star wars anakin #anakin skywalker x female reader #anakin skywalker smut #star wars prequels #anakin x reader #anakin smut #anakin skywalker fanfiction #anakin skywalker one shot #Spotify

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throneofsapphics · 5 months

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Hi I saw you were open for drabbles and I hate this idea of like reader gets sick or need to take medicine for whatever reason but wont take it because it tastes bad. So I was thinking either maybe Azriel, Fenrys or if you don't like the two you can do a poly couple having to like force feed the reader because she wont listen to them?

Its okay if you don't like the idea though.

easy decisions

Azriel x Reader

Summary: you’re sick and refusing medication, Azriel takes matters into his own hands.

Warnings: illness, forced medicating

A/N: thank you for the request! I’ve think i’ve written this idea before, idk why but I love it

“Mother save me,” Azriel muttered, crossing his arms. A small mountain of pillows and blankets surrounded you, a fire still roaring in the corner of your room. You’d been ill for days. At first, Madja said you’d likely get better with good rest and food - but it had progressed to the point where intervention was necessary.

Yesterday, you’d taken it willingly - today was proving a bit more difficult. Unlucky for him, you were the most stubborn person he’d ever met. Lucky for you, even if you didn’t think that, he refused to compromise when it came to your health.

“I suffered through it once,” you hissed, “that was plenty.”

“And Madja said to take it once a day.”

Mouth clamped shut, you shook your head and slid down in the bed. Adjusting the comforters around you, you turned your back to him.

In. one, two, three. Out. one, two, three.

“It’ll be over quickly,” he sat next to you, running his hand over your shoulder, the other folded around the glass vial.

“The taste will stay in my mouth for days.”

“You’re being a bit dramatic,” he murmured, and you snapped your head towards him, eyes narrowed.

“You take it then.”

“I’m not sick,” he fixed you with a look, “and I have.”

The same stubborn expression. He loved you, he really did, but right now you were making it difficult.

“You're not going to convince me.”

“I already have hot chocolate for you,” Azriel tried a bribe this time.

A shake of your head. He’d give it one last try.

“Don’t make me force you,” he said - a half plea, half warning.

Eyes rolled, “you won’t.”

Another breath, in and out. “One more chance.”

You studied him for a moment, and a bead of hope flared in his chest - extinguished when you turned your head back, tucking the blankets up with you.

Azriel didn’t like doing this, but you were forcing his hand. Either you take the damn tonic, or he has to watch you grow more ill. It’s an easy choice for him. Moving quickly, he placed the bottle on the nightstand, gently gripping under your arms, tugging you up to sit. You yelped, thrashing in his grip, but he was already straddling your hips.

A shadow floated the bottle over, he snatched it and flicked the cork off, sending it flying somewhere across the room.

“Take. It,” his jaw clenched, normally endless patience at its limits.

Hands tried to shove at his chest, but shadows wrapped around your wrists, pinning them at your sides. Your jaw remained clamped shut, and he wondered if you were doing this just to spite him, or if it really was because you hated it. Either way, he wouldn’t feel too bad over it.

His hand wrapped around your jaw, scarred fingers rough against your smooth skin, and he squeezed - just enough for your lips to part, and to tip the contents of the vial down your throat, before he squeezed your jaw shut. Your entire face scrunched, but your throat never moved.

“Swallow,” his voice was firm.

A shake of your head - as much as you could move it. Now he knew you were being stubborn on principle. He tossed the vial aside, letting it clatter over the carpet, and pinched your nose between his thumb and forefinger

A promise of vengeance gleamed in your eyes. He’d like to see you try. A few seconds passed, your face growing red, but the desire for air took over, and your throat bobbed. After taking a few seconds to make sure you actually swallowed all of it, he carefully removed his hands.

You sputtered, sucking air in and out of your lungs. Shadows still held your arms down as he ran his fingers through your hair, one thumb brushing away the drops on your lip, before pushing back into your mouth. You glared, but your tongue swirled, cleaning the last few bits.

“Good girl. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” He couldn’t help the small barb - especially as he saw the spark in your eyes, the fire he loved so much.

A healthy dose of self-preservation had him sliding off the bed before completely freeing you, ignoring the litany of curses you spit at him to retreat to the tray placed on the dresser. It was risky, giving you his back, but the illness had you weak enough you couldn’t do much to him.

Approaching you like someone might a feral kitten, he extended his peace offering. The mug of warm molten chocolate, exactly as you like it. You huffed and rolled your eyes, but took it from him, trying to fight the small smile.

Azriel sat a few feet down - out of your reach, and moved the blankets enough to reach under, running his thumb in circles on the inside of your knee. “I hate seeing you sick.”

Clenching the mug with both hands, your eyes softened, “I know.”

“Will I have to do this again tomorrow?”

A small hum, neither a yes or no. For fucks sake.

#azriel x y/n #azriel x reader #acotar imagine #acotar drabble #acotar x reader

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thegnomelord · 2 months

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okay i finally caved and wanted to talk about my idea for a nishruu inspired monster of sorts? i just enjoy rambling a little bit as you may be able to tell

so nishruu. red whisps that endlessly hunt down magic and magical items to sate their hunger, so these creatures are a nightmare for mages and magic wielders. all of my knowledge for these guys comes from dnd, so ill have to take a few creative liberties but im not complaining! pure nishruus are rare - as well as humans that have under some circumstances become fused with these little magic eaters. they're slightly similar to wraiths - having whispy bodies that are impossible to contain considering how they can slip through even the smallest of cracks. they look... mostly human, besides the way their forearms, into their hands, fade into a red mist that flows off of their form, and how they can turn fully into whisps and slip away. these half-nishruus rely on magic to sustain themselves the same, so it isn't uncommon for these acceptionally rare monsters to seek out mages or other magic wielders and make a deal. i really love symbiosis - and considering that half-nishruus have human intelligence, making a deal is typically the best plan for them.

the deals are usually simple - in exchange for some magic to keep them sustained, the nishruus will fight to keep the person they made the deal with alive. after all, it's wise for them to keep their... supplier? alive, considering how many magic wielders will likely throw salt the second they see red whisps. oh, and nishruus main weaknesses are salt. it deals damage similar to poison to them. some magic wielders have even been spotted with sealed amulets containing a strange red substance inside, containing these nishruus until battle comes, where they release the magic eaters (which are likely very hungry) to aid them against any enemies who may have magical weapons or spells

also just imagining a nishruu hybrid crawling over to ifrit and begging for a deal, then ifrit keeps them like a pokemon lmao

-🪸

Okay this is cool and got me brain doing the hyperfocusing thingy so here's a noncannon blurb with Ifrit set at a time when Ifrit's been, mostly, redeemed lol. Probably doesn't make much sense but idk

You stare at Price, unmoving, unblinking. Then your gaze slowly slides to the man sitting across Price's desk. Corporal Simmons shrinks into himself, shoulders hunching and looking down, unable to meet your eyes. He doesn't know why he feels like a little boy in your presence, he's your superior for fuck's sake, but the way you look at him. . . if fucking scares him.

Finally, you speak, voice softer than Simmons expected it to be. It only makes the cold edge to it press against his throat harder. "Captain, with all due respect, which is none." You say, your hard gaze falling back to Captain Price. "What the fuck?"

Price lets out a low sigh, already done with your shit yesterday. "Don't make me write you up private." You both know he won't, you've said and done worse things than this. "You heard me clearly."

"Yeah, I heard you." You say, unable to hide the way your muscles tense, your fingers curled into fists. "I just don't understand why I have to keep the damn leech alive."

Simmon's tries to speak up, "Hey, I'm not-"

"Shut your mouth." The way you say it leaves no room for argument. Even without using magic, Simmons can feel the way it simmers beneath your skin, like lava bubbling beneath the earth. So plentiful and vast it makes his mouth water, stomach coiling itself into knots as red smoke fizzles at his fingers. God, he's so hungry, he hasn't eaten in weeks.

"Captain, there are other mages that would be more than happy to have this parasite attached to them." You grunt, motioning loosely to Simmons. "I don't get why I have to feed the damn thing." You make your disgust for Simmon's painfully clear.

"That's enough private." Price's growl forces you to listen, your attention on him as he stands. "This is an order." His hand reaches out to grip your chin, his touch making your skin prickle even when the balaclava you wear dampens the touch. "You will follow." His blue eyes stare into yours, thumb tracing the curve of your jaw. It's almost endearing, the way he does it, but you know enough about dragons to see the hidden dominance in his touch. "Am I clear?"

You feel yourself frown, your eyes narrowing. "If it tries anything funny I'm taking it behind the barn and putting it down."

"Ifrit." The latter half of your callsign rolls off his tongue into a low rumble. Price tightens the hold on your chin, making it clear you're skirting the line of how much you can push before he needs to tan your ass to get some obedience back in you.

It makes your lightning prickle beneath your skin, "Yes sir." You grumble. "I understand."

"Good mage." He tuts and lets you go, "Dismissed."

You nod your head, your eye catching Simmon's as you turn to your heel. "Follow." You say, the sharpness in your voice making him scramble out of his seat after you. He sticks close to you as you walk through the hallways until you reach the training area, the walls and floors singed and blackened from weeks of training.

"Just so you know." You say, turning to look at Simmons. "As far as I'm concerned, death would suit you better." You say as you take off your glove, revealing the cooled mana texture of your mage marks. You hold your hand out, your fingertips starting to glow as you let a bit of mana flow to your palms.

Simmon's nearly stumbles over his feet, hands reaching out to hold your hand. He can't help but moan as he presses his lips to your palm, the smoke coming from his arms curling around your skin. He feels like a starving man finally getting a glass of water, feeling the mana flow into his body. He feels hot, his tongue tingles like he's just eaten something spicy, but god if feels wonderful.

He doesn't think he's ever met a mage with so much plentiful mana as you, his teeth nibbling on the volcanic chunks of your palm as he devours more mana. It curls in his belly, traveling through his veins, making him feel so warm and he just wants more, more, More—

"That's enough." You growl, pulling your hand back and quickly putting your glove back on. "Should be enough for a week." You grunt, leaving him standing where he is.

#gnome's tea break #gnome correspondence #🪸anon #hell has a basement floor series #non cannon #captain john price x male reader #captain john price x reader #cod modern warfare #cod x reader

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fatuismooches · 4 months

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Hello smooches, its 🥝 anon. I'm sorry for not popping up on ur inbox for a very long time again (health issues, again.) i hope that you are doing well! I see so many Dotty's rambling when i scroll down a bit and honestly i can't wait to read all of it 🙏🛐 (and also hoping to see just a bit of Capitano content from u-)

So.. Remember when i said last time that i have a brainrot about Capitano's Childhood Crush with fragile!reader? In ur Capitano Childhood Crush fic, reader always sends a lot of letters to him but he never recieved them, right? (It was disheartening, just like what u said on the fic..) And, Well..

Imagine that all of the letters are about reader telling him about their conditions, their illness getting worse and worse, until the last one about reader wanting to see him again for last time..

When Capitano wanted to see them again, he sends some of his Fatui agents to search for reader whereabouts (since it would be too dangerous for reader's safety if he is the one who come to them, also he never see them among the crowds for a very long time whenever he and his troops came back, reader always come to see him..).

Now, imagine his reaction when his agents told him that reader is already dead a long time ago or when he finally found all of reader's letters 😔

I'm trying to make my ask not too long, æügh 😩😭 i'm sorry if its messy- 😭 anyways, sending virtual hugs for u smooches for still feeding us Harbinger content for more than a year now 🤗💞🛐 as always, bless u and ur big brain writings

-a rotten 🥝 anon

(Also recently, i saw an "early" story leak about the next region on twt that we will have Dottore boss fight in Natlan instead of Capitano. Idk if its true or not, but if its true.. then, i guess you guys Dottore lovers better prepare for him now 👀 i want to see some C6R5 Dotty mains here)

HI 🥝 ANON!! I MISSED YOU! And don't worry about popping in! I want you to take care of yourself first above all! I hope you enjoy the plentiful Dottore brainrots though :3 (and i promise to post some Capitano brainrots. Just for you.) BUT AHHH THIS BRAINROT... WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME SAD. (Yes, I remember when I put that in my fic! I can't believe it was so long ago though- you made me go back and reread it 😭)

Imagine if you live in a secluded part of Snezhnaya. It's quiet and pretty with only the servants in the house to keep you company. Capitano let you stay here instead of the mansion because staying in that big house without him would probably make you sadder. Though you are already sad without him, it's a bit better. But you spend a lot of time writing him letters. It was a habit of yours, telling him what you've done all this time even though he's not here. Some letters get sent, some don't. But you always put the happier stuff in the letters that get sent to him. He's out doing a lot of hard work, you don't want to bother him with your illness! Though anyone could see the lingering sadness in your letters. However, the battlefield is a tough place and the long distance doesn't help your case. Things are bound to get lost and go missing. So you're left waiting, and waiting, and waiting for your husband's replies that never come... Eventually, you stop sending them, instead keeping them in a box.

Although Capitano is busy with his mission, he wonders why you haven't reached out to him. Amidst the war and battle, he does look forward to your sweet letters, perhaps your handwriting may not be the best, but he loves to see how his darling is doing. He of course focuses on his duties, but he always thinks of you. So it wouldn't hurt to send an agent to report on you, since clearly communication isn't the best right now. When the soldier arrives and hears of your demise, he isn't sure how to break the news to his Harbinger. All he can do is hope that the letter makes it to him after the battle is over, so morale isn't too down. And it does. The Fatui win this battle, and the letter comes just in time. Ah, finally he can see how you're doing, Capitano thinks. But when he reads the first sentence, he's... well, I can't explain his emotions very well. Empty would be a good word. Why? Why didn't he know? Couldn't something have been done? You were find before he left, how did your condition worsen that quickly?

He won't know, because he won't ever hear your voice again.

AND YEAHHH i saw that leak too but. To be honest i don't really believe it, a bunch of story leaks have turned out to be trolls so tbh i don't really pay attention to them anymore, especially when they're so far into the future 😅 But my c6r1 Arlie savings are going strong right now! (400 wishes >:)

#smooches talks #🥝 anon #fragile reader <3 #capitano love notes <3 #ughhh i want dottore so bad :(( I LOVE HIM SM #I NEED HIM ON MY TEAMMM #but i hope you are doing well too anon! im sending even more hugs! 🫂#and thank YOU for sticking around for so long! i greatly appreciate that 🥺❤️❤️

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batsandgore · 18 days

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Hello !

Glad to see a new DL blog ! Would you be willing to write platonic headcanons ? I'm such a sucker for the Sakamaki with a little sister.

Hope you'll get plenty of fun requests ! Take care !

Hi!! Of course I can! There's not enough plationic DiaLovers content out there, to be honest. This one is for all you platonic enjoyers! You take care also <3

The Sakamakis with a little sister...

Shu Sakamaki:

He's the eldest, but let's be honest, he doesn't act like it in the slightest. He won't take responsibility for his little sister or pay attention to her anymore than he would to the rest of his younger siblings.

If she's quiet or similar to Subaru, he'd like her more than the rest (we all know Subaru is his favourite).

If his sister has any plushies or soft decorations in her room, she may find some missing. They're now acting as his pillow which isn't a bad fate at all tbh-.

If she's ever interested in learning a new language, she comes to him. Shu canonically knows Latin. If his sister catches him in a good enough mood, he'd be willing to teach her a few basics.

Consider him the watchful older sibling. He keeps an eye on all the goings on in the house, but unless it's extremely serious, he's very unlikely to intervein.

Reiji Sakamaki:

Whether you're his sister or otherwise, Reiji expects order and compliance.

Expect Reiji to be drilling in womanly values and etiquette into his little sister. As the older brother here, he feels as though it's his responsibility to have her raised properly (considering Shu is too lazy and Karlheinz is just... off the face of the earth idk where bro is).

Another Sakamaki who canonically knows another language - German. He's much more likely to teach his little sister than Shu would be. He'd be happy about how inquisitive she would be.

Would definitely brew potions specifically tailored to her if she ever falls ill or something happens that requires medical intervention. He's the unofficial nurse of the Sakamaki household at this point.

If she's lucky enough, he'd invite her into his lab room to have tea with him if he requires downtime.

Ayato Sakamaki:

He enjoys having siblings probably the most out of all the Sakamakis, except for Reiji.

He'd try and persuade his sister to get into one of the school sports teams. But what if she's not a sports person? When there's a will, there's a way. Ayato is very persistent.

Constant sibling bickering. And I mean constant. Especially at the monthly dinner parties. Reiji is like a tired mother of six, having to manage these two at the dinner table.

Has her make takoyaki for him constantly. It's his favourite food, after all. Low-key treats her like his personal chef at times.

Usually, he uses his sister as a meat shield if he's the brunt of one of Kanatos tantrums.

Kanato Sakamaki:

Kanato would love a little sister. He constantly has someone around him that he can treat as a doll, unlike the sacrificial brides which come and go quicker than day and night.

He'd love her if she wore lolita outfits. Big dresses that fall down to the ankles with a puffed out waistline that encompassed her legs on the way down.

This would probably be thanks to Reiji reinforcing those womanly values and dresscodes, but Kanato wouldn't complain or bat an eye at this. It benefits him greatly.

Would invite her to the room where he keeps all the dead brides on display. He'd maintain them with her and even ask for clothing advice for them. Sibling bonding!

If his sister bakes, he'd certainly taste test them for her. For her sake, though, let's hope she does a good job.

Laito Sakamaki:

A sister would be nice entertainment for him... in the sadistic sense. Laito loves psychologically messing with people, even his own family. And especially women.

He'd fuck with her in little ways though, not to the extremes he usually goes to with his brides or victims.

Oh? Is your journal missing? No, Laito didn't touch it! Somehow, he knows all the secrets you had in there now and teases you with them weeks later. Strange...

He'd play pool and darts with her. Card games, too! He loves those types of games. They give him a chance to relax, and they need at least two players after all!

Would ask her to help lure unsuspecting victims in to drink their blood, sharing their blood with her as a reward for helping out. She's typically more trusted as a woman, and he happily uses this to his advantage.

Subaru Sakamaki:

A fairly distant brother, honestly. Although, given she's the youngest after him, he has a closer bond with her compared to the rest of the brothers.

He takes care of her from the sidelines. He always watches out for trouble on her behalf, even if he doesn't admit that he does this for her.

Secretly, he revels in the fact he has someone younger in the family. It means he can look out for and protect them, something he couldn't do for his mother.

If she has an interest in flowers, Subaru will walk through the gardens of the Manor with her from time to time, explaining the flowers and their meanings.

Gifts her a knife, similarly to how he did with Yui. He wants her to be protected, even when he's not there.

#dbl #diabolik lovers #dialovers #dl #shu sakamaki #ayato sakamaki #kanato sakamaki #laito sakamaki #reiji sakamaki #subaru sakamaki #diabolik lovers headcanons #headcanons

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arieshasbrainrot57 · 3 months

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saw these floating around, inspired by this post (https://www.tumblr.com/kammieceleek/684194629204279296/send-me-a-ship-and-ill-tell-you) and I wanted to do it with Jally bc I have neglected posting about them for way too long and i always have headcanons floating around my brain

who is more likely to hurt the other?

probably Dally. he has a habit of talking before he thinks, especially when he's mad, and he can be cutting when he's in a bad mood.

who is emotionally stronger?

Johnny. He can take a lot before he finally breaks down.

who is physically stronger?

it's an even tie, with Dallas only winning by a little.

who is more likely to break a bone?

Dallas. he already has a handful of times, both before and after he met Johnny, including breaking two fingers (at seperate times), his nose, a handful of ribs and his foot once.

who knows best what to say to upset the other?

Johnny. He's quiet at times, but he's observant, not to mention he's the kind of person most of his friends feel comfortable enough around to tell him about their problems or insecurities. He pays attention to things that other people usually assume he wouldn't notice, which gives him plenty of room to say just the right thing to sting.

who is most likely to apologise first after an argument?

Johnny. Mostly out of anxiety coming from his parents' arguments. He doesn't like the idea of someone, especially someone he loves, being angry with him and he hates the stiff silence after an argument. He usually apologises as quickly as he can to shut things down before they can turn out like his parents.

who treats who’s wounds more often?

It's an even mix. Both of them are usually sporting injuries on any given day, either from fights with their parents or fights with other people around town, so they both end up having to play nurse for the other.

who is in constant need of comfort?

Johnny. He has a lot of relationship anxiety after watching his parents implode on each other for years, so he has a hard time feeling secure in his interactions with Dallas.

who gets more jealous?

Dallas. He tends to keep it to himself, to avoid coming off as too aggressive. He doesn't want to scare Johnny off or anything like that, but more often then not his jealousy bleeds through his denial anyway.

who’s most likely to walk out on the other? probably Dallas. He’s been just bouncing around, doing whatever he wants for so long now that he’s not used to sticking things out.

who will propose?

They feel like the type of couple to both be meaning to propose for ages but be too scared to bite the bullet just yet and then end up accidentally popping the question at the same time.

who has the most difficult parents?

Johnny, since we don’t know much about either of Dallas’ parents.

who initiates hand-holding when they’re out in public?

lol it’s the 60s so neither of them, but if we pretend for a second that’s it’s not then Dallas. Johnny would be too worried about pushing and making him uncomfortable when he’s not ready to make the first move in that regard.

who comes up for the other all the time? I don’t really know what come up for means so idk lol

who hogs the blankets?

Dallas. He tosses and turns like crazy in his sleep, so he usually ends up dragging the blanket with him.

who gets more sad?

Johnny, since Dallas represses it as much as he can, whenever he can.

who is better at cheering the other up?

Johnny. He’s one of those people who’s just very reassuring to be around when you’re having a hard time.

who’s the one that playfully slaps the other all the time after they make silly jokes?

Dallas. Johnny could say the stupidest, corniest pun or joke and Dally would still snort and slap his shoulder.

who is more streetwise?

Dallas, but Johnny’s not far behind him. He’s only got him beat bc of all the time he spent in New York.

who is more wise?

Johnny. He’s a lot more emotionally mature, among other things.

who’s the shyest?

Johnny. He can shut down or not talk much when around new people or just a lot of people, most likely due to his issues with his parents. He doesn’t want to say the wrong thing and set anybody off.

who boasts about the other more?

Surprisingly Dallas. Tim’s probably considered strangling him just so he’d stop rambling about Johnny’s eyes or how nice he is despite everything that’s happened any time he gets alcohol in his system. He can’t help it, he’s still in shock that someone like Johnny would be interested in him that way.

who sits on who’s lap? Dallas, since they’d probably only do smth like that in a private setting, considering the time period lol

#the outsiders #jally #johnny cade #dallas winston #dallas x johnny #headcanons

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restinslices · 5 months

Text

Crows As Vampires

Idk why I chose that gif-. Anyway I have had no inspiration or motivation to do anything. The mental illness is hitting. I am on my knees begging y’all to let me have this😭. No one’s born a vampire cause I don’t think vampires should be able to reproduce and in this universe how you’re changed determines what kind of vampire you are. I’ll explain later.

Kaz Brekker

Kaz has screwed over plenty of people in his life. That's how life is as a criminal and he was damn good at it. Almost an expert.

Almost being the keyword

Kaz screwed over the wrong person. Unbeknownst to him, this person was actually a witch. The witch cursed him to have these symptoms we would call “vampirism”

Immortality so he would watch everyone he loves die. A lust for blood since he was a leech that led others like a lamb to a slaughter. Burning in the sun so he could stay a rat in the shadows. Ect. Ect.

This would've been terrible for anyone else, but this is Kaz Brekker we're talking about.

Also this isn't how nature works. Things can't be only good or only bad so nature gave him a few perks.

All it took was some practicing and getting used to then boom, he was living his best life.

He doesn't need the cane anymore, but he keeps it to trick others.

Genuinely thinks the witch that cursed him is the dumbest person ever because all the weaknesses he can get around. The sun? He doesn't go outside much and can have others do shit for him. Holy water? Does this man look like he goes to church? A wooden stake? What are the chances? Garlic? He prefers onion powder-

He's a traditional vampire so blood tastes good no matter what. I don't know if he'd go hunting himself though. He'd probably have another Crow bring him something, like bringing the homie Wendy's if you just got some.

Best part of vampirism is probably the animal control. It's the perfect distraction and this man is nuts so he'd probably have a rat jump on somebody with a phobia.

I'd say hypnosis but I feel like Kaz enjoys the thrill he gets from outsmarting everyone. Hypnosis would be so boring to him. It'd only be used if he absolutely needed to.

I think the part of vampirism he'd struggle with the most would be the feeding though. Not out of guilt but too many dead bodies make people raise a brow and that would affect business.

Kaz would prefer feeding on people who don't really have anyone. I know you're thinking “duh! That's so obvious! Who wouldn't?”. Jesper. More on him later though.

Kaz wants to go after opponents but knows that'll stir too much shit up.

I wanna say he refuses to feed on kids ‘cause it'd remind him of him and Jordie but this is the same man who threatened a little girl and said he'd kill all her dogs just to make sure she wouldn't snitch. And when Wylan was like “that's not ok” he was like “I could've killed her and made it look like an accident”, so idk. Man is deranged.

Kaz has red eyes because… uhhh… I want him to.

I think vampires should have another face when they feed and his gotta be the scariest. This is The Bastard of The Barrel we're talking about here. You gotta feel fear in your veins.

Overall, he's enjoying vampirism. Big mistake giving this man powers.

Inej Ghafa

Inej would get turned when she's at the Menagerie

One of the regulars came in but he was off. He was way more jumpy and sensitive to things. Inej knocked something over and instead of annoyance, he seemed to be in pain. Like his ears hurt.

She didn't say anything though. Tante Heleen would kill her.

Suddenly the man attacked her and bit her. She screamed but he covered her mouth with his hand. Inej did the only thing she could think of and bit his hand hard, drawing blood. The man was in pain and after a short fight, he snapped her neck and killed her.

Weirdly though, Inej woke up after some time. It made no sense to anyone. Not to the other girls, Tante Heleen, the doctor, anyone. Inej should've been dead. Instead all she did was crack her neck and describe the guy who did it.

The next day Kaz Brekker came and she introduced herself. The day after that, she no longer worked for Tante Heleen.

Turns out the vampire who attacked her was a newborn. He had some of the vampire strengths, like advanced speed and strength but he also still had human qualities. Like human skin, instead of the impenetrable skin older vampires have. Kaz was hunting him down because his uncontrolled killings were causing a ruckus, that's when he met Inej and noticed something was off about her. She smelt like death.

Inej turned instead of dying because when she bit him, it drew blood and she ended up swallowing it. Drinking a vampire's blood then dying was another way to be turned.

Because she was terrified when it all happened, as a vampire blood tastes better if it's from someone scared. The more scared they are, the better. If she drinks normal blood, it tastes fine but it doesn't make her as strong or taste as good as blood from someone frightened.

Inej doesn't really like going out of her way to scare the shit outta someone. Don't get me wrong, Inej ain't no punk but she sees it as “I'm scaring people for my own benefit? No thanks”.

During her newborn stage, Inej was not fucking with it at all. There were benefits but she hated the idea of murder. The only reason she started drinking is because she was starving and Kaz threw a random person in the room. When she snapped out of it, she was horrified and she was angry because Kaz knew what he was doing.

So she attempted to run away but the problem was the hunger obviously didn't stop. One day she saw a man she knew frequented the Menagerie. A man who was extremely abusive and had cut and injured the girls plenty of times. Again, she got angry. So angry she stalked and killed him.

A lightbulb went off. She didn't wanna scare innocent people but abusers? They weren't innocent. So that's who she targeted. Oh and obviously she returned to the Crow Club.

Only problem with abusers is unfortunately they have money and people looking at them so she can't go after a lot of them which leaves her back to drinking regular human blood. Sometimes she drinks from animals or steals blood bags.

Best part of vampirism is how nimble she is. Sure she was a great acrobat before but her speed and agility change is the best to her. She could do so much more without worrying about forever losing her legs in a stupid accident.

She's called a spider for a reason.

I don't even think she'd care for the other powers. Yeah they're there and she'll use them but she's not too concerned.

Worst part I think is the feeding but not for the same reasons as Kaz. Inej has a guilty conscience and she's also religious. I think the fact that she has to take innocent lives (when she can't get to bad people) would make her feel cursed. Like the Saints were against her or didn't hear her prayers anymore. How could she claim her heart belonged to them when her heart didn't even beat anymore? She was sinning often. It's not like killing on a job, that's when your back's against the wall. She's literally killing for her own selfish needs.

It'd take her a while to come to terms that she's killing for survival and she never asked to become a vampire in the first place.

Once she comes to terms with that I honestly don't see her using her powers for straight nonsense. She uses them to get jobs done and feeds when she has to. She's probably the one bringing Kaz take out when he's too lazy.

Idk why but I feel like she'd have purple eyes. I don't have a reason. Just roll with me.

Overall, she'd have conflicting feelings. The first couple years would be rough but she'd learn to embrace it.

Jesper Fahey

Jesper is my favorite Crow and my favorite in the entire show but my poor babe is not all the way there sometimes. He's not dumb by any means but ya know, sometimes he's in a silly goofy mood.

Jesper was turned when he was in college. Keep in mind, my boy was only there for what? A WEEK?

He lost at a game of cards and instead of beating him they were like “there's this book that a dead witch supposedly wrote. There's a ritual and everything, you gotta do it or pay me”.

Jesper was like “bet, I ain't no hoe” (probably not with those words) and did the stupid ritual which consisted of blood, rain water and some chanting and nothing happened, much to the disappointment of his college pals and him. The ritual was supposed to give him powers or something. Too bad.

Something weird started happening. Jesper was a funny guy and liked socializing but he swore he started feeling more energy course through him when he made everyone laugh. And when he walked outside, the sun burned. It left a mark and everything.

He started skipping classes to avoid the sun and the kids he knew were too busy to constantly visit him. Since he was alone for a couple days, he felt incredibly hungry.

One late night he was walking to get food when a lady fell hard. Jesper, being nice, ran over to help. That's when he noticed the smell of blood and it smelt amazing. Long story short, he ended up attacking her. When he realized what happened, he took a closer look at that book. He realized they didn't inform him about the negative side effects. And sure, he somewhat got it. What were the chances of it working? But since they made him do that instead of paying up, they knew there could've been a possibility of everything going left.

He had no idea what was happening and ended up leaving college. Not only was he out of money (that's why he was so glad he wouldn't have to pay) but he worried about who else he would attack. He ended up working for gangs and as we know, Kaz found him.

They ended up finding out that Jesper was special. Jesper was always the main focus in a crowd so when he became a vampire, that ability turned him into an emotional vampire. He didn't have to hunt people down and feed the old fashioned way. He could feed on people by absorbing their emotions when they felt a strong emotion, such as happiness. It made him feel amazing but it made them feel drained and depending on how much he took, they could faint.

Now he could always just bite people but absorbing emotions is bigger.

Best part of vampirism is hypnosis. If he's well fed and feeling strong, he can just hypnotize his gambling opponent into letting him win.

Worst part is probably the sunlight. Jesper likes nighttime, don't get me wrong, but the fact that he's limited to only moving around at night is nuts to him. Since he shouldn't be doing it, he wants to do it more.

Jesper has to be reeled in by Kaz when it comes to feeding cause Jesper honestly will go after anyone. The more challenging, the more fun. He has to constantly be reminded that the more challenging, the more chance of being caught.

He also reminds him that he doesn't have to bite people to feed but Jesper sometimes just likes the rush.

Probably makes a bunch of vampire puns and Kaz is tired of his shit.

He'd be even more on edge when it comes to his dad. It'd be even more of a reason to never see him again. He would only think about it when he 100% had his hunger under control.

Idk what eye color he'd have tbh

Overall likes being a vampire but the side effects are there.

Nina Zenik

After Nina took Parem, things didn't look good. It was obvious to everyone that Nina was dying.

Nina was in the know when it came to vampires. She honestly didn't care and didn't have any interest at first. But as she sat there slowly dying, she wondered what life would've been like if she asked to be bit.

The Saints seem to be listening because Inej walked in and said she wanted to help her. Nina knew how she'd help.

Inej was getting closer and Nina couldn't help but feel nervous. Suddenly though, she saw Matthias. Inej simply made her think she was Matthias, but Nina was so delirious that she actually thought it was him. She thought of their life together so far and what they could have in the future. Her thoughts started to slip towards something more lustful and that's when “Matthias” shoved “his” bloodied arm at her. She drank it then her neck was quickly broken.

She awoke soon after, beginning her new life.

Nina is a sexual vampire, meaning blood tastes the best when it's someone experiencing feelings of lust or orgasming.

Matthias experiences lust for Nina and has said she can drink from him but she doesn't trust herself. She's worried she got him out of Hellgate only to kill him later on.

Instead she flirts with unsuspecting men and women. No sex obviously and they don't taste as good as they could but just that little bit of lust adds something to their blood.

Best part of vampirism would be immortality. She's living forever with her family and doesn't have to worry about getting sick or dying again.

Immortality is also the worst part. Matthias has always said he has no interest in being a vampire and the thought of him dying makes her think she should've let herself die on the boat (until she changes him against his will but moving on-)

Probably targets men and women with low level jobs. Like the people who guard doors of some building, rich people go to. Or fishermen. People whose disappearance can just be chalked up to them being irresponsible.

Being a vampire is kinda in the middle for her. Not great but not terrible. Sometimes she wants to go outside during the day and can't. Sometimes she wants to eat something like garlic bread and can't. Sometimes she wants to wear silver jewelry and can't. It can be a real pain.

When Matthias is human she treats him like he's delicate, because compared to her, he is. They arm wrestle and he's down for the count.

The stereotype is that vampires sleep in a coffin but with how big Matthias is? Yeah, no. They'll just sleep in a dark room.

Nina doesn't exactly want kids, but with Matthias she wouldn't mind them. Now they can't have them at all though and that choice being taken away isn't fun. Honestly any choice now taken away rubs her the wrong way.

I feel like her eyes would also be red like Kaz.

Overall is half and half about vampirism.

Matthias Helvar

As we all know, Matthias ends up dying in Crooked Kingdom. He didn't want it to happen, but he accepted it. He knew this would be the end.

Imagine his surprise when he woke up months later.

Turns out Nina wanted to turn Matthias into a vampire but acted too late. She ended up finding a witch who was willing to do a ritual to return his spirit to his body. Side effects would be symptoms of vampirism.

As you can imagine, Matthias was very unhappy. Nina didn't have the excuse of “oh I panicked”. No. She found a witch and instead of asking for her future to be told, she whipped out his corpse.

As a vampire Matthias is a soul vampire. When he feeds it decreases the lifespan of his victim, sometimes even killing them. As he gets older he learns he doesn't even have to bite his victims, but he does have to be close to them.

It'd probably take years before he forgave Nina. Matthias, like Inej, is religious and thinks Djel can't hear him anymore because of what's happened.

For awhile he can't see a positive to this situation. When he comes around to it and starts accepting it though, I think he'd enjoy that he's strong enough to continuously help people.

Negative is everything for a while. Especially the fact he can't be near any holy items. Also immortality. Human lives are supposed to end, now his can't end without it being extremely painful.

Feeding wouldn't be easy for him either. Not biting them allows him to disconnect but he still knows what he's doing and that's hard for him.

He eventually would forgive Nina but would never forget what happened.

His eyes would remain blue but it'd be a lighter and more glowy (?) blue

Doesn't wanna participate in any vampire stereotypes. No coffin, no dark colors, none of that.

His feeding is the most discrete. Jesper's could be too but we know him. Matthias just kind of hangs around and feeds until he's full enough.

Matthias also drinks the souls of animals. It doesn't feed him as quickly or make him as strong but he was already a big and strong guy.

Overall is not having a good time. I think it would take years for him to accept his new life. After that, he's not exactly happy. He's just accepted it is what it is.

Wylan Van Eck

Wylan had a terrible relationship with his father, we know that. What everyone didn't know was that the family was holding a huge secret; Jan Van Eck was a vampire. He was turned after Alys became pregnant and thought things were great. Now he could be an asshole forever

Van Eck noticed how much better he felt so he thought if he bit Wylan, he'd be cursed of his dyslexia and could read.

He was wrong. Dyslexia isn't a physical injury so nothing happened. This made him angry and ended up leading him to hire people to kill Wylan on the boat to Ketterdam. As we know, Wylan escaped. Van Eck was sure he'd die because of lack of food or be exposed and killed. Either was good to him.

Wylan didn't die though. Wylan had only been a vampire for a month so his control over his thirst was terrible. He didn't wanna hurt people so he tried to stay away and hunt animals.

Not hurting people was easier said than done though. Ketterdam is full of people and jobs require you being around people. As you can imagine, there were a few slip ups.

Kaz recruited him not only to make bombs but also because Inej caught him feeding on someone. He just didn't notice she was there.

Once Wylan has his thirst under control, he prefers blood bags instead of actually hunting and hurting people.

He isn't sure what his favorite part of vampirism is since the things he loves doing (chemistry and music) don't require any vampire things. He likes telepathy once he knows how to block his own thoughts from people. It's efficient being able to “whisper” to other people and Wylan is a bit nosey. When you're gonna live forever, you're gonna wanna hear drama.

I think his least favorite part wouldn't be a specific part of vampirism. He'd just hate how he used to be. Whenever he thinks about how little control he had, it'd scare him. It shows how much of a monster he can be and he doesn't want that.

I wanna give everyone red eyes but I'll say his are orange or yellow. Why? Idk.

The type of vampire that legit forgets he's a vampire. Inej is like “want me to bring you back something to eat?” and he's like “oh sure. I heard this new spot just opened-”.

Probably was gonna walk outside for a casual walk and another Crow had to grab him by the collar and pull him inside.

“What's wrong?” “Wylan. The sun.” “What about it?.... oh”

This isn't me saying he's dumb, he just genuinely forgets. His mind is on other stuff all the time.

Vampires become his hyper fixation and he starts saying random ass myths about vampires at all hours

“Did you know people used to believe that you could trick a vampire by throwing things like rice at it? Supposedly it'd be compelled to count them all” “It’s 2am Wylan. Enough is enough”

Overall I don't think he has a strong opinion on being a vampire. Having his little family makes enjoying this new life easier.

idk why this in particular finally gave me inspiration, but FINALLY my mind isn’t completely blank.

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absolutebl · 1 year

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Well from your recent posts I've gathered that you are not a Big (with a capital B yes) fan of A Boss and a Babe so it's probly safe to say this . The reason i haven't watched this series is bcz I find the leads eerily similar looking?? Like if not siblings but atleast like distant cousins ??? Idk why but i can't unsee it now. Help .

Oh I don't think they look alike at all. Sorry, I don't know how to help you.

Maybe focus on specific features? Think of it like you were sketching them as a portrait artist? Like they have different mouth shape, eye shape/placement, cheekbones, and hair lines. Force (left) has a thinner straighter mouth more sculpted, slightly higher more prominent cheekbones, much heavier lidded eyes (he looks sultry and sleepy most of the time), slightly broader nose, longer face over all, and a prominent Adam's apple.

Book (right) has more delicate and finer features, his face is more heart-shaped and proportions are different (where his features fall on his face), smaller slightly pouty mouth, thinner nose, slightly rounder cheeks, close but less deep-set eyes. He's also lighter skinned. For all these reasons he's cast as the uke in their shows, as they are pretty much the same height, age (Book is actually a little older), and deferential politeness IRL, it could have gone either way.

(I don't make the rules, the yaoi gods do.)

Your Moment of Academia

If you're still struggling, there could be more/other reasons for this.

There is something called the Cross-race effect which may be impacting you. (The way to train your brain out of this one is to just keep watching tons of dramas, fashion, MVs made by cultures not your own. More info and discussion on this in this episode of All in the Mind podcast: The human drive to connect – and divide)

There's also Prosopagnosia to consider, although that's a lot rarer than modern peeps make it out to be.

I've also always felt like Dunbar's number may come into play with this kind of thing too. Like perhaps the human brain just has a limited max capacity for facial recognition storage.

So you might do better if you focus on their mannerisms and way of speaking which are completely different. (Siblings usually share vocality and mannerisms especially if they were raised together.) Body language and their way of holding themselves, smiles, eye crinkles, use of eyebrows, etc... Very few actors can move on from these tells.

Book has a more mobile face (which is why he suits comedy so well) but Force's is more emotive and expressive in nuance. He's uses more micro-movements, like little eye crinkles and a little crooked smile.

Their voices are very similar, but Force's is more burred, and a little more monotone (rare in Thai). He has a mellow soft way of speaking especially around the ubiquitous krap. Book has a rounder, wetter way of speaking, his kraps are more sharp and clipped.

All that said, IMHO you don't have to bother to watch either of ForceBook's series. So far this pair has been ill served by GMMTV. So if it wigs you out, there is plenty other, better BL.

Also if you want to actually watch a BL where the characters are some iteration of siblings, I'm sure Japan is there for you. If not, there's always the stepbrothers trope...

I have to say, I tend to way MORE annoyed when characters in a show who are meant to be siblings look absolutely nothing alike. Like bone-structure level "qua?" I know blood siblings don't always look alike, but they rarely look so completely different as we often get in TV or film the world over.

Way back, I did a series of actors in BL who I thought SHOULD play brothers and these are my favorites:

Mark Siwat Jumlongkul and War Wanarat Ratsameerat.

Now those two boys look related. To me, anyway.

(source)

#asked and answered #probably with more information than you wanted #ABL gets academic #BL and anthropology #BL and sociology #Thai BL #ForceBook #a boss and a babe #Enchante #Mark Siwat #War Wanarat

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fromdarzaitoleeza · 7 months

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What do you think life is about?..I mean I am a student whose going to be adult next year what do you think I should hope for?...Right now for instance I'm kind of struggling with my studies wondering if it's even gonna work out or not...so at the end of the day I end up with only one thought what am I running for?, what do I even want from life, what am I even working hard for?...

Life holds a very different meaning to every single one of us ,even among that, most people desire a life based on what they didn't receive as a kid, some didn't receive emotional stability / love others didnt have financial stability for all things they could have had, some people have a set of goals which help them move forward in life , for some people they just want love and to be loved for rest of their lives.

Since you are turning into an adult your first most basic goal should be financial stability, figure out your weakness and strength if studying is something that can help you make money go for it, if not there are different things such as business/marketing etc you always have plenty of time before u could make your mind up .

Money is one thing but at the end of the day it's all about love ,peace and finding something that makes you walk through this life ( it could be a person who loves and takes care of you that makes you feel how beautiful this world and life could be or it could be passion to improve yourself at something carrer) , may be your answer could be in finding what were things you wanted as a kid or when you were thirteen?

You don't have to figure everything out as soon as you turn adult, no one can ever figure out what they truly want, you grow more as a person with time and understand what you want ( ps: it's a different thing at different stages of life ),most importantly you should work for yourself for all the things that you deserve of and never forget you deserve everything.

As for me I am the only child of my parents my both parents suffer from a life long illness and one of my parents has gone through a life and death surgery ,the other parent has a chronic illness , i don't share very good connections with my parents either but idk how much time i have together with them so all I am trying is to do something that will make them feel good about their lives , or trying to do something that makes them happy/proud , this is the only reason which keeps me moving forward in life. I have no other desire of my own, my hands are covered in blood and disappointments.

#sorry this is too long but i hope it helps you #time flies anyway

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hmshermitcraft · 7 months

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Oh! Howdy it's me again!

-~-~-~-

{Polyhermits, Bdubz / Rendog based for the most part, Hurt/Comfort I think?- idk it's 6 am}

Bdubz, The moss cloak man, resident phantom, and just resident chaotic short person, (he's a man of many names fr,)

Sure he's quite the energetic dude, and nice! Reminding hermits to go to bed on time, Making sure they take care of themselves, making sure they don't overwork themselves,

..what about him though? Who remembers to remind him to take care of himself?

The hermits haven't seen him all day today, they're getting worried! So someone decides to send Ren to find him, and he does find Bdubz, but...he's laying in bed, moss cloak as a blanket, hiding, the only thing Ren sees staring back at him is those two glowy eye's he's gotten so used to seeing at night,

Ren, Sitting next to him on the bed, exchanging a few words while bdubz voice noticeably weaker than usual, Ren manages to get him out from hiding under his cloak, Bdubz is burning up with a fever,

Ren scoops up the bundle of moss and phantom wings into his arms, and takes him to doc, because...resident doc-tor or something idk?(I'm proud of that one)

After a few minutes, it's found out that he just has a lil cold, because for some reason he decided to stay out in the rain for too long trying to help tango with something because the rain hurts tangos tail(blazeborn), which, admirable, but damn it take care of yourself!

At least he'll recover in a few days hopefully, and meanwhile he does get visits from a few other hermits to check on him and make sure he doesn't pull anything like that again while he's already sick,

(And Ren got plenty of thank yous from the sick phantom dw)

-~-~-~-

-🎻🌃

(Remember to take care of yourselves too! Have a nice day/night/afternoon!! Sorry not sorry for the bad doc pun)

It's not common for phantoms to get sick. At least, as far as Bdubs knows. It's not like many people have researched them outside 'useful for repairing elytra.' But, Bdubs personally does not often get sick!

So, by the time he was in bed and realised he felt miserable, he had no plans to get out of it. This was becoming his new home. Curled up, under the covers, sniffling away. Until Ren plucked him up and he had to be subjected to Doc poking and prodding at him. Doc gave him a lollipop after, so fair's fair.

And, boy, if this is how people are treated when they're sick, Bdubs should get ill more often! He's waited on hand and foot, everybody wants to spend time with him and he gets food whenever he wants! It's wonderful. Being a bit under the weather is totally worth this.

Ren sighs and gives him sad puppy eyes when he says that, though. So maybe he shouldn't.

#hermitshipping #ask #bdoubleo tag #rendog tag #docm77 tag #rendubs #polyhermits #🎻🌃 anon #mod 🎀

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silentmoths · 1 year

Text

As Fragile as a brick wall

Masterlist||First||Previous||Next

hey hey it's me kinda sorta back from my social media pause. kinda because I'm still likely to be very quiet for a while.

Ch 5: Zhongli attempts to locate his renegade princess to ask a question.

Ganyu wins a bet.

Zhongli x Afab (fem pronoun) Reader

little death/gore in this one? just a wee bit.

NSFW elements in later chapters

Multi-chapter, Royal AU, angst, mentions of death, eventual fluff, eventual smut, idk more tags when they happen ig? (Wonderful header image made by the wonderful @ainescribe)

Zhongli was a king, he had won the throne by strategy and wit. His new people adored him, his allied kingdoms were warm and welcoming to the changes he had brought about.

So why?

Why was an unassuming wooden door simply too much for him?

All he had to do was knock, and yet every time he turned down the hallway towards her room he just… froze.

Princes he could capture.

Kings? He could kill those, take their place, and overhaul their battered kingdoms.

The princess however, was a hurdle he could not jump, no matter how many attempts he made.

Obviously he needed to speak with her.

He needed to clear the air, talk plainly.

(perhaps apologise for attempting such an underhanded tactic as forcing her to marry him? Yeah, definitely.)

It takes him three more days, of deliberating and debating with just his own mind, of Xiao’s confused stare, and Ganyu’s tired, but knowing smile before he finally relents and marches to her room.

The lack of guards at the door should have been the first hint, but Zhongli is so focused on doing this one thing that he does not notice.

“Princess?” He calls as he knocks “I need to speak with you.”

There is no answer, as expected, she was still ignoring him.

He knocks again.

“Do you intend to hole up in here forever?” He asks, still no response.

Now, surely she was making a fool of him.

“I’ve given you plenty of warning.” He sighs, gripping the door handle “I’m coming in-”

Oh, well no wonder she wasn’t answering.

She wasn't even here.

Zhongli blinks, staring around the room, in a way it was good to see some things never changed. While the decoration of her chambers had grown and matured with her, he could still see small touches of…her, about the room. Worn down and damaged from time under tyranny, but still distinctly what he remembered.

The glaze lilies, in a vase he remembers her mother once owning, sit beside the open window, swaying softly in the breeze, and his heart squeezes just a little…they had always been his favorite.

“M’lord.” Ganyu’s quiet call very nearly makes him jump, turning to find her standing in the doorway. “Her highness has a tendency to leave quite early in the mornings, and not return until nearly dusk.” she informs him.

“And why, pray tell, has it taken you this long to inform me of this?” He asks, shooting her a less-than-impressed look, only to have her smile knowingly.

“To be honest with you, it was a bet between us attendants, to see how long it would take until you finally worked up the nerve to enter her room….so thank you for making me slightly richer.” She giggles, turning and vanishing down the hall to let her king stew in his flustered state.

But now a new question floats to the forefront of his mind.

Where exactly was she going?

—

“Oh princess, you really don’t have to-”

“It’s quite alright, Siqin. Your horse has taken Ill, Azhdaha is more than capable of towing the plough, even at his age.” You’re quick to wave off the farmer's concern “Isn't that right, old boy?”

Beside you, your dutiful horse snorts, ears pricking forward as if offended that the farmer was insinuating he was unable to perform a task. Siqin gnaws his lip for a moment before sighing.

“Very well, your highness.”

“Oh, please there’s no need to call me that. Technically I’m no longer a princess-” you attempt to reason with him, but are quickly shot down by Granny Chu, shooting you a venomous look.

“Nonsense!” She shouts “Just because your father no longer rules does not mean this kingdom no longer recognizes you as royalty, dear.” she huffs as she turns her gaze to Siqin, the man scrambling to attach the plough to your horse. “Besides, you have more than earned the title in the village’s eyes.” She continues “you come out here every day to help with the smallest of things.”

“Your horse falling Ill isn’t small, Granny.” You retort, taking a seat beside her to help husk the most recent harvest of corn, your hands far slower, softer and less skilled than the elder, but something to do, anything to help is what put your mind at ease. “Azhdaha, be good for him, or no sugar cube tonight.” You warn the stallion; watching his ears pin back in frustration before he finally hauls off, a very frightened Siqin saddled on his back. “If you can’t plough the fields, you can’t sow the crop, without the crop there will be no harvest.”

“Oh I’m sure we would have figured something out.” Granny Chu mutters, a fond shine in her eyes as she leans over, gently grasping your hands and physically helping you through the motions “Like that..”

“Thank you.” you mumble, getting the right technique down after a few more tries, keeping a watchful eye on your temperamental steed as he effortlessly trots along the field, tilling the soil. “Do you know of anyone else who may need assistance?”

“Hmm, I do believe Miss Bai would appreciate you paying a visit to the schoolhouse.” She muses “A visit from the princess would definitely spark the children’s interest.” “Not a princess anymore-”

“Hush.”

You both fall silent for a moment before an unmistakable giggle slips from your lips, only to be followed by granny chu’s own snicker. Soon enough you’re both laughing, and you find yourself at peace.

In all your years, it had been doing things like this that had brought you the most joy, helping your people and seeing them grow, watching their happiness bloom. This is what you wanted.

—

After a rather interesting story time with the local school children (in which they all demanded stories from other kingdom’s you’d visited), a commotion outside pulls everyone’s attention.

Unfortunately what you find outside only makes your smile drop.

Zhongli, slowly walking down the path, soft, warm smile on his face.

What’s worse? The moment he sees you, it only seems to widen, and now you had nowhere to hide, delightful.

At least until a devious idea floats to the surface.

Zhongli had always had a soft spot for children…and you just happened to have a small army of them gathered around you.

“Well, would you look at that.” You lilt in a sing-song tone, one you knew would get the children excited. “The king himself has some to see you all as well! What a lucky day it is~”

A dozen pairs of eyes look up at you and then to the approaching king, hope and excitement abound. Jackpot.

“I know you all must have so many questions for the new king, don’t you?”

All at once, the children scramble, bolting away from you and crowding around his feet instead. At first, Zhongli blinks in shock, his gaze quickly flitting to you, but then back down to the children and- goddamn it.

You had somewhat hoped that this new diversion would at least annoy the man a little, but the warm smile and soft look is back. How dare he have the gall to look so…content. Oh well, at least it gave you a few moments to scamper away; surely Siqin would be done with Azhdaha by now.

Siqin is more than happy to hand the reins of your ornery stallion back to you, fields freshly tilled and ready to be planted, and you waste no time making yourself scarce. The less you had to see of him and his stupid smile and handsome face and pretty eyes, the better. Azhdaha, usually a steed of routine, doesn’t even question when you don’t head back towards the castle immediately, instead making for somewhere quiet to be with your thoughts.

A small grove of sunsettia trees upon a hill seemed like a nice enough place. You can’t help but giggle as you note the carvings upon the wood; seems this is where the youths of the village used to come here with their sweethearts to carve their names into the tree trunks, how novel.

A nicker and a nudge by an impatient horse snout pulls you from your thoughts, Azhdaha looking up into the branches and stomping a hoof, ah, of course. A hard day’s work deserved a few treats. A swift climb up and soon you find yourself situated comfortably upon a branch, reaching up to pluck fresh, ripened fruit from above to feed them to your demanding horse below, occasionally biting into one yourself as you look out over the small hamlet.

Since your little…intervention, the village had really come together…listening to your suggestions and helping one another. You would never admit to anyone but…god you’d been so afraid that the idea would fail…you’d never had the chance to do anything when it came to guiding the kingdom and even then, it was only because Zhongli was flailing that you even had the nerve to intercept…but looking at all the once broken down, dilapidated houses and buildings slowly, but surely being restored, people helping instead of fighting, things could not have possibly gone any better.

Minutes slowly meld together as you simply enjoy being… doing nothing in particular. Azhdaha, now having had his fill takes a rare opportunity to roll in the grass. Old and noble he may be, but even your old, grizzled warhorse still had his moments.

The view from atop the hill truly was lovely. If you’d had a knack for painting, you’d almost consider coming up here to paint the village as it is now, and then perhaps returning the next winter to paint it again, just to see how things had changed.

And you also wonder what the view was like from the top of the tree...Glancing up, the branches looked sturdy enough…

By the time Azhdaha notices your ascent, you’re already halfway up, a soft laugh bubbling in your chest. This reminded you of childhood, when your mother used to take you out to the orchards proper and you got to run and play amongst the trees, chase, hide and seek, simply picking and snacking on whatever fruit you could reach… fond memories indeed.

Finally, your head emerges from the foliage and oh- you were right about the view being even more gorgeous from up here. At this vantage, you could just see over the tops of the cobbled rooves of the bakery and the smithy and out into the rolling farmland behind, the slowly waning sun bathing the fields rich golds and oranges, a kind of warmth you’d not seen in your own kingdom in years.

You’re so mesmerised by the sight that you don't hear the call of your name, or even the crow cawing nearby, until the winged creature swoops just that little bit too close, startling and causing you to jolt, fingers unable to grasp the trunk in time as the sudden movement snaps the thin branch you’d been standing upon; and then you’re falling and you silently curse yourself.

Dead via sunsettia tree, what a headline that would make.

But a shout, a strong pair of arms and a warm, firm chest meet you before the ground does, and another body goes tumbling down the hill a ways with you, cushioning your fall and likely saving you from much worse damage as you both come to a stop at the bottom of the hill, Azhdaha trotting after you.

“Are you alright?” A familiar voice asks, you look up to meet the gaze of your rescuer and find none other than those damningly beautiful eyes.

Zhongli.

His hand gently comes up to caress your cheek with his thumb, fingers softly brushing hair from your face as the panic in his gaze slowly fades, not seeing any immediate injuries.

“Are you alright?” he asks again, calmer this time, and you nod, still trying to find your voice.

“I- um…y-yes, I’m fine.” you finally manage to choke out, internally chiding yourself for such a weak response, even more so when you realise your leaning into his hand, which has simply come to rest cupping your cheek in a way that was much too tender for your liking.

Only then do you truly realise your…compromising position, both laid out on the ground with you sprawled across the kings chest like some…harlot.

He has the gall to chuckle when you gasp and quickly sit up, shifting off and away from him and back to your horse, who’s massive nose is quick to sniff at your hair and clothes to ensure you were actually alright. Some of your muscles protest, your leg and torso especially, having hit a branch on the way down, you can feel the bruise already blooming across the back of your thigh and the dull ache just above your hip, but that was nothing you couldn’t handle.

“What…what are you doing here?” you finally manage to ask as Zhongli sits up, smiling…always smiling at you, you hated it. “Well…” he hums “I had initially come to speak to you in your chambers…only to discover you absent…so I thought I might take a walk in the village to see how the plan you’d made to prepare for the winter had been faring-”

“I mean-” you interject with a frustrated sigh “why are you here?” you reiterate. If there was one thing you remember about Zhongli being somewhat prolific for back in his days as a knight, it was constantly over-explaining.

“Oh! Well, I was hoping you would join me for dinner tonight…” he states as plainly as a commoner would state their name, the casual nature of it all leaving you blinking and caught entirely off guard, something the king at least seems to take into account.

“I…went to the garden.” he slowly admits, rising to stand “I…saw the statue…I feel like there is much I need to explain to you…about why I left and why I have done the things I have… allow me that…and then if you still wish to have nothing to do with me…well…we’ll sort something out.”

“What do you mean by that, exactly?” you retort, narrowing your eyes at him “‘sort something out?’”

“Simple really…it’s unfair on you to have to continue skulking and slinking about the castle…so if my explanation is not to your tastes…whatever you need to live happily…I will provide…but we can speak more on it later…perhaps at dinner, no?” and that smile is back as he turns, looking over his shoulder at you for a moment longer before he departs “I’ve already asked the kitchens to prepare a few old favourites… but know I won’t hold it against you if you do not attend.”

And then like that, he simply continues on his way, like he hadn’t likely just saved your life. You stare after his retreating frame for a long while, long enough that eventually, Azhdaha begins lipping at your ear and pulling your attention back from whatever dimension it had faded off to.

You shouldn’t.

But you had to know.

Why he’d left, what he’d been doing, why he’d come back, why he had attempted to leverage your hand…questions that burned too brightly to simply be extinguished, no matter how hard you tried.

With a sigh,you finally mount your horse once more, wincing in pain as you settle into the saddle. Usually, before returning to the palace, you would take Azhdaha on a good, hearty gallop, get him good and lathered up before returning to the stables for the eve, but even your crotchety old steed can sense your body is simply not up for it today. He had always been gentle with you, but today even more than usual as he walks you back to the castle.

Seems you had a dinner to attend.

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