#im honestly very tired with how my younger brother seems to not care that he's beenusing me this whole time and i let him bc brothers

[alicemitch09writes]

growing pains (three little foxes universe)

when you’re the youngest, sometimes it was easy to get away with anything. yes, almost anything. well, mostly.

then again, being the youngest gave kaoru a lot of leeway to do whatever. it’s not like he’s doing anything wrong, they’re all just things he pleases.

however, time and time again, he would get reprimanded if what he asked for was too much. more often than not, the person who’d reprimand him was his big sister - (y/n).

his mother was too gentle. his uncle was too carefree. and his other older sister - mika, believed in the philosophy of letting kids enjoy their youth.

but not his big sister (y/n).

nope.

she was not only the strictest person in their family, she was the strictest person IN HIS LIFE.

she may be five years older than him, but her strictness could be unfair sometimes. he was lucky to get away with most of the stuff in his life, if he were to meet her conditions.

it annoys him sometimes that she treats him like a child, as though he couldn’t handle whatever. each and every time he sees an opportunity, she was there to block him.

“nee-san, you’re so annoying!” he tells her, because she was holding his hand as they were crossing the street. age: 6.

“ah, no nee-san, i want to do it!” he calls after her, because he wanted to cut the vegetables for dinner. but she told him off and he never did. age: 8

“nee-san, stop it!” he screeches, face read, because she was cleaning his face IN FRONT OF HIS ONII-SANS! age: 12

“what would you know about love, nee-san? you’ve never even had a boyfriend! let alone, someone who likes you! knowing how boring, plain, and robotic you are, it’s no wonder nobody wants to date you!” he yelled at her, red in the face. age: 13.

for each time she blocks him, she receives his irate, rash words. yet, she remains firm on her ground, letting him say his piece until he’s wrung dry. afterwards, she’d ask him if he was done, then he’d stomp off angrily.

“kaoru, can you please call your sister and tell her it’s dinner time?”

“okay mom!”

climbing up the stairs, he heads straight for the door across his. just as he was about to knock though, he hears sniffles. immediately, his hands freeze inches away from the door.

he hears it again - the sniffles, but this time there was a thud.

kaoru found himself frozen in place, not knowing exactly what to do. his first instinct was to rush to his mom and uncle, to tell them about it. but he can’t. his feet were glued to the ground, body unable to do anything at the sound of sniffles.

and then came a sob.

he jolted on the spot at the sound of it - a sound that quickly muffled, as though the person didn’t want her sobs to be heard.

but kaoru heard it.

a heartbreaking sob followed by light thuds. although muffled, he was sure to make out a scream being held in by sheer force.

with mika away, the only person who was left, who was on the other side of the door, was big sister (y/n).

not wanting to stay any longer, he rushes down to tell his mother that his sister was busy studying, clasping his shaking hands behind his back.

during dinner, as he listens to the adults converse about trivial things, his gaze falls on the empty seat next to his uncle.

a moment later, his big sister appears at the dinner table - expression indifferent, per usual. as though she didn’t have a breakdown earlier. like kaoru wasn’t there to hear it.

-

big sister (y/n) was a lot of things.

she was, and he reiterates, the strictest person he’s ever met. heck, she’s stricter than his own teachers!

she was also ridiculously smart - always managing to get amazing scores for as long as he can remembers, coming home with papers with O marks, being in an honor’s class, or even having teachers mention her to him at times. she offered to tutor him, mika, the miya twins, or anyone who asked for free!

he’s heard it a lot, but she was super reliable. may it be house work, school work, or club work, she was ready to give a hand. whenever her uncle needed help, she was the first to volunteer. without being asked, she would cook breakfast and dinner. most of the time, she prepares lunches for him and mika, too!

despite how intimidating she looks, she was so incredibly gentle. proof of this was how she easily cares for their family. sure, he had both his uncle and mother, but she just as easily takes them into account and complies with chores.

sometimes, he even forgets that mika was actually the oldest sibling and not her!

for all her amazing feats, kaoru can’t help but wonder just how much his big sister has done in her life for everyone around her.

there was one thing he hated about his sister, though.

she was secretive.

hiding in the face of indifference, never shall she disclose matters of the heart. or more like, she’ll give the bare minimum before shifting the subject off.

when the (l/n) siblings come to mind, it was very easy to start off with mika, the pretty, sociable, sweet girl-next-door. she was also a school heartthrob, a soccer player, and part of the student council.

kaoru, was the youngest. the only boy who loves soccer, a gentleman, sort of naive, and funny boy-next-door.

and then there was (y/n). the smart one.

that was it.

he didn’t mind at first, being a naive little boy.

however, when his friends came over and big sister (y/n) just happened to pass by, the conversation went:

“akio, you like kaoru’s nee-san!?”

“e-eh-!!!!”

kaoru blinked. “huh, really.”

“you don’t mind, kaoru!?”

“...um, it’s just nee-san.”

“nah, if you were to choose, i’d rather you chose kaoru’s nee-chan!”

“yeah! she’s pretty!”

“right? right?”

“compared to his nee-san, well...no offense, kaoru, but she’s just...okay.”

as he returned to the game, the young boy was unaware of his nose scrunching at his friends’ remark.

similar conversations followed through the years, kaoru never once thinking about it much until he considered the details of them, realizing just how overlooked big sister (y/n) was.

yet his big sister would always have this look of complete indifference on her face.

not once has she ever spoken about it, neither has she spoken about what people think about her. however, she knows. she knows a lot of things, just that she never chooses to talk about it.

she’s known for a while.

he never realized just how much words can actually impact someone, never realized as well just how much his big sister endured.

truth be told, he had to admire just how patient she was. reckless words - mostly innocent, were thrown her way almost on a daily spanning for years. at some point in his life, the words people were saying to his sister started to get to him.

with the patience of a saint, kaoru really had to wonder...especially when it came to him.

looking back, was he really that much of a brat growing up? just how much of a burden was he to his big sister (y/n)?

to him, his big sister (y/n) was practically invincible - she was smart, ruthless, intimidating, yet at the same time kind, responsible, reliable, and considerate.

one time, when he broke the neighbor’s claypot because he was practicing his soccer moves, instead of him doing the apologizing, it was his sister. she bowed to the neighbors and promised to replace it. a day later, she went off to tambe with her uncle and returned with the promised pot.

another time, he found some chocolate inside his bag. earlier that day, he had complained during breakfast that he was scared of his japanese and math exams. while his big sister gave him an indifferent look, because she was tutoring him for the past few days, the rest of his family were assuring him.

when he complained about calculator breaking, over a study session with his sister, she wordlessly gave him hers. she never asked for it back since.

over a heaping serving of chicken stir fry she had successfully made for the first time, everyone had a hearty meal - including him. the next day, when he opened his bentou, he found chicken stir fry.

without even having to say anything, his big sister definitely could tell what he wanted before he could say it himself.

even with the many times he’s annoyed her, the times he got mad at her nagging, or the accidental slip of his mouth, his big sister would always be there for him.

and yet, what has he ever done for her?

sure, he quickly picked himself to learn how to cook straight after she cut herself. each and every time she came home and over dinner, she’d give her honest feedback about how oily the serving was or it was too much that osamu would help her finish it. nevertheless, she would compliment his cooking. kaoru felt even more determined to cook.

there was also him working on his grades, just so his sister could have something less to worry about. seeing as she was a club manager, already, plus she was going to be a third year soon, he really needed to give her something less to worry about.

one time, he overheard her talking with both their uncle and mother, sharing how she really wanted to study outside the prefecture but was worried about leaving them behind. 

university was fast approaching. 

never had he thought of losing his sister that fast, after having her by their side for so long.

she loved the family, she really did.

but there was a bigger world out there, and family shouldn’t keep her from seeing it. those were his uncle’s words.

quietly, kaoru slipped back to his room and cried. then, he worked even harder with his academics and soccer. he didn’t want to disappoint or worry his big sister (y/n).

it’s funny, because big sister mika had been gone for a while now and despite the video calls, the fact that she wasn’t there didn’t really bother him.

his big sister (y/n) on the other hand? man, that would hurt so much.

now that he realizes it, maybe all he’s ever done was take his big sister (y/n) for granted.

after telling suna rintarou off about how he didn’t like her for his sister, something inside him told him that he was doing the right thing. he was protecting her is all! and yet, when big brother reiki had to talk to him, gently telling him off about the way he talked to his big sister’s first boyfriend, there was guilt.

in kaoru’s defense, of his two sisters, big sister (y/n) was probably the hardest for people to love and the most sensitive to it. nobody could ever understand her, could ever deserve his big sister. nobody but big brother atsumu, who was her best friend.

reiki’s words woke him from his overprotectiveness, however, putting it into words that: “you’re clearly underestimating your own sister if you think like that. you’re potentially saying you don’t trust her own judgement to choose who she believes is right for her. sure, you’re looking out for her, but you also have to trust her, kaoru.”

and that got him.

finally doing the one thing he owes his big sister, which was protecting her heart, yet doing it selfishly in the process.

the next time his sister and her boyfriend came to hyogo, kaoru was beside himself the whole time as he wanted to apologize to him. big brother osamu told him that the two were recovering from a fight, something kaoru felt was partly his fault, making things even worst for him.

reiki’s words rang in his head over and over, big sister mika’s, too, after hearing from reiki what happened.

honestly, he felt like the shittiest brother in the world for what happened.

after seeing how happy his big sister truly was next to suna, how relaxed she was the whole time, and how big and bright she smiled - something he hasn’t seen in a long while, something that she has long been deserved, how could he not feel so shitty?

“kaoru?”

he looked up, meeting the same shade of (e/c).

“a-ah, nee-san?”

“are you alright?”

no. but he didn’t want to tell her that, ashamed at his own guilt. so instead, he lowers his head.

he hears her sigh, followed by an arm snaking around his frame for a side hug. he was so tall now, even taller than his big sister, but this hug made him feel...small.

“you know you can tell me anything, right?”

“...it...” he breaks into a sigh, leaning against her. “...it just feels like i owe you an apology.”

“an apology?”

he nods. “one long overdue.”

her eyes widen, her hold tightening.

“i...” he swallows thickly. “i’ve been a terrible brother to you, nee-san. you’ve done so much for us, given us so much, too, yet ask so little in return. but mostly importantly,” he swallows again, feeling and hearing his beating heart. “i...i...”

as though reading his thoughts, she leaned against him, feeling the material of his sweater press against her cheek. “i forgive you, kaoru.”

his eyes shoot wide open. “but nee-san-”

“shh, you don’t have to say anymore. nee-san will always forgive you.”

“b-but,” he stammers. “i’ve said horrible things to suna-san! i basically drove him to nearly breaking up with you! i would’ve robbed you of your one happiness you so utterly deserve! h-how-”

“and did you feel bad about yourself?”

“what?”

she turns her head, (e/c) meeting his very own. “have you thought over your actions?”

“wha- i- yes?”

“and did you talk with rin, already?”

“o-of course! b-but i wanted to talk to you, first!”

“then you’re forgiven.”

“nee-san!”

suddenly, he feels like he was 6 again, frustrated as the light before them flashed green, a striped crosswalk before them.

she shakes, a rare mischievous look on her face. “now you know what it’s like to be at the receiving end of annoyance. kaoru, you’ve suffered enough already. and you were looking out for me. thank you for that. but please, trust me with this, okay?”

he could see his stoic big sister holding out her hand, patiently, staring down at his stubborn, puffy face.

even now, his big sister (y/n) hasn’t changed one bit.

“...okay, nee-san. i’ll talk to suna-san after this, i promise you that.” he adds the last part instantly, causing his sister’s eyes to shine.

“that means a lot to me, kaoru. thank you.”

little him takes his big sister’s hand and together, they cross.

-

“where’s your dad?” a friend once asked him.

for as long as he can remember, kaoru has never once asked nor considered asking that question. he shrugs as a response, much to the confusion of his other friends.

“so...you’ve never met him?”

“i was a baby when he and my mom separated,” he reasons, twirling the bottle in handle.

one of them hisses, face apologetic. “sorry, man.”

“it’s fine.” truly it was. he takes a careful sip.

“oh, right, you have your uncle, right?”

“yeah.”

“and you’re okay with not knowing your dad, like ever?” as soon as the question was asked, someone next to him smacks them. probably to tell them off, the question veering towards insensitive.

realizing this, his friend was just about to take it back, only to stop at kaoru’s smile.

“no need,” shoulders slacking, he leans back against the sand, eyes to the stars. “like you said, i have my uncle. also...” a smile splits his face. “i have my big sister (y/n).”

#alicemitch09 writes #lol #just an excuse to write on kaoru #or an excuse to write a brother i was mine was #im honestly very tired with how my younger brother seems to not care that he's beenusing me this whole time and i let him bc brothers #that #or im just an easy person for my brother #i don't even think he respects me #i honestly felt like crying thinking about this and writing it up #three little foxes #(un)loving miya atsumu deleted scene #or side-story

[silas-png]

trauma dump? ig? idk anymore im too tired for this

FOR CONTEXT: I'm a minor-- I will not say what exact age out of privacy reasons-- and going through a conflicting time for myself. I would like opinions, honest opinions if you have the time to read this essay of a trauma dump. If you don't want to, scroll past, by all means.

I really just want to know what's going on. I've looked it up on Google and researched several websites and from my experiences, it seems like it could be psychological trauma/ abuse, or parental manipulation, but that's just a guess. I, unfortunately, cannot seek professional help solely because I don't want my parents to treat me worse because of them finding out about my accusations.

---

Can parents support your gender identity and still be homophobic in action towards you? 'Cause like, my parents and family use my chosen name and chosen pronouns, but my parents tend to often gaslight me and/ or manipulate me(saying things along the lines of "I guess I'm just a bad parent", "You're only saying sorry to yourself" and never apologizing for their actions or taking the time to say the simple word of 'sorry')-- this all started after I came out-- and have never believed a word I say. They also place blame on me for things I didn't do sometimes and often bring up past events or faults that I have simply because. On top of this-- and a part that I honestly understand-- my parents do not allow me access to gender-affirming care or hormone-blocking pills. This is because I live in a homophobic state, but the only off thing about this is I have a friend who's trans and taking the Big T and hormone blockers, and he's not an adult.

On the topic of being trans-- or just LGBTQ+ in general-- my parents did not believe me at first. They thought I was being influenced by my transgender cousin, and straight up told me that I was wrong about myself. Then, after I came out as trans to them, they started to take me more seriously-- solely because of the situation in which I came out the second time. Which was them finding out I was self-harming-- it was a whole thing, they both found out I was doing that and was trans that day. funny story, actually, i still have trauma from that day.

My parents tend to blame all of my actions on my being a teenager and blame all of their actions on the fact that I'm a teenager. My parents also have the tendency to shrug off all of my mental health problems. For example-- and for those uncomfortable with the topic of sh, please skip past this to the next paragraph-- I used to self-harm for a couple years-- from ages 12-13/14. My parents found out twice and both times they did nothing. The second time I got a firm scolding from my mom, and my dad was disappointed. Since then they have never bothered to check up on how I'm doing mentally, or even bothered to care, for that matter.

My younger brother-- who's 11-- has become more aggressive in words towards me and very often finds some random reason to tear down my self-esteem-- knowing it's already low-- and he used to use my dead name as a form of making fun of me. As well as this, he's gained a sort of god complex over me. He seems to think that he's better than me, and it confuses me. He also does this then acts like nothing happened when my parents walk by, and he gets away with it. However, as soon as I make a jab at him, he's sobbing for my parents or straight up screaming insult after insult at me.

Also, for the record, my parents treat him better than they treat me because he's emotionally sensitive and I'm a bit of a bottler when it comes to emotions. However, they also treat him with more attention because he has an abundance of medical problems, but because of this they treat me like dogwater and him almost like the golden child. So, I want to know, am I just being jealous and/ or overreacting, or is this actually a problem?

#transgender #trans problems #childhood trauma #please help #what do i do #i think this is a cry for help but idk anymore #god help me im so tired

[katerinabythesea95]

ANOTHER HOUSE OF WAX RANT.

(I know Surprise surprise)

Didn't plant on doing this but I'm watching Bo scenes cause I wanted to see him and here we are.

When he tells wade that he gets stuff delivered to his house, he's blinking various times quickly (I don't remember for sure exactly, but it's a sign of lying)

He seems a bit sarcastic when he talks about his mom's dream with the wax figures

I don't think he cared much for the figured themselves

From my previous rant, I stated the possible similarities between the Sinclairs and the sisters from Whatever Happened To Baby Jane? (the movie playing in the movie theater scene)And right now Im thinkin there's more clues to my theory that Bo wanted to keep Vincent hidden just like the older sister did to the younger sister in the baby Jane movie.

Also HOW do they keep the electricity and water running? Are they pulling some kind of Dexter's lab ish at ambrose? They hits to pay the bills somehow.

Do we honestly know if Bo has no real job? Like I think he really is a mechanic who worked in ambrose until it died out, and then he went to get another Job In another gas station or car shop. (Ill be elaborating more on that topic in my HOW fics)

WHY AM I SO ATTRACTED TO THAT ELVIS PRESLEY GREASY MECHANIC?? HES WAY OLD FOR ME AND HES A. MURDERER AND I WOULD LITERALLY PICK HIM OVER ALL THE BOYS IBE HAD A CRUSH ON IRL I JUST WANNA MARRY FREAKING BO SINCLAIR AND HAVE FAMILY WITH HIM

that glue scene we all love? I COULD WATCH OT ALL DAY EVERYDAY AND NEVER GET TIRED OF WATCHING IT

I love Brian van holt, he's a great actor and all but He's not in a lot of shows or movies that I would normally watch, so THANK YOU TO JAUME COLLETE for introducing me to Brian.

Although I do love Both Bo and Brian, Im definitely more in love with Bo, AND I AM SO CONFUSED LIKE BRIAN LITERALLY PLAYS BOBBY COBB AND BOBBY IS FUNNY CRAZY NOT A KILLER HANDSOME AND PRETTY COOL GUY. AND I WOULD CHOOSE BO OVER HIM BECAUSE BOBBY CHEATED ON HIS WIFE, AND I LITERALLY RATHER MARRY A SLASHER THAN A TWO TIMING DOG (no offense to Bobby he's great, just not husband material)

I've also fallen in love with Vincent after reading and writing about him, fancon is just amazing like that.

After reading a post I've recently found about Vinny's deformity, It backed up my personal theory that he in fact, is able to speak, maybe a bit of a speech impediment but still. I think he just gets really tired when he talks cause maybe his brain works faster than he can speak or his brain gets a bit mixed up when he speaks.

I bet the brothers have matching tattoo

I wanna expand the back stories of ma and pa Sinclair. Not to defend them but to explain how is it that they became the way they were. To show them as human beings instead of just evil parents.

I don't think Victor was a dead beat dad. He was a Surgeon who literally did the complicated and possibly deadly operation that separated the twins. He could've just let them be conjoined forever or killed them on "accident" he was probably a mess trying to desperately save perform the surgery and keep his sons alive.

The fact that although in an inadvisable method, he did deal with Bo and his episodes.

I prefer to use the word episode instead of tantrums because I'm pretty sure that Bo wasn't just misbehaving.

There's a difference between throwing a hissy fit and having a mental condition that causes panic attacks

Maybe something Victor did that morning triggered little Bo and he started having his anxiety/panic attack. (Waking him up before he was ready, treating him roughly, or yelling at him or maybe all of the above)

From the little pictures we have of baby bo smiling that baby Yoda adorable level smile I think he was a happy child, not a troublemaker.

Maybe at one point his parents mere presence became a trigger to Bo and he experienced more episodes

Trudy had a freaking cyst in her brain it could've very well been there when the twins were born or soon after, and grew undetected until it was too late. Maybe that was the root of her behavior towards Bo.

I think she was immature in the sense that she couldn't cope in a healthy way with Bo and his condition that she just reacted the way she had learned as a child herself. (It happens alot, even when adults try not to, they always resort to some extend to how they saw their own parents handle situations. It's inevitable, yes there are many who try to break the habits but it's not easy and it doesn't happen overnight.

I also have a personal headcanon that Bo has a real job, cause like HOW in Davey Jones locker do they have running water for an abandoned town supposedly nobody knows about (Just like Dexter and his lab. Like my dude how do your parents not get a loaded electric bill??)

I wanna see the brothers' drivers licences (hahaha🤣🤣🤣 we all know those never come out right) only one I wouldn't tease is Vincent. I don't wanna hurt my poor baby's feelings. 🥺🥺

I ADORE BO'S VOICE (HOW COULD ANYONE NOT??) Even his BREATHING has me fangirling

HIS HAIR HIS EYES THE WAY HE CARRIES HIMSELF SWEET NIBBLETS WHYYYY IS HE SO FOINE

I wanna cuddle with all three Sinclairs on the couch and just binge on horror and Disney movies

Im sad cause we don't have more canon material with them talking and being themselves

I've said it in an old post of mine, WE NEED A HOW SERIES. I think Brian can pull of playing Bo again and they can use Dylan minnette as young Bo and Vincent and I'm not sure but maybe Thomas Brodie Singer as young Lester, Vera Farmiga as Trudy and Patrick Wilson as Victor ( actually using the latter two as ma and pa Sinclair in my fanfic)

I absolutely love the idea of the Sinclairs as fathers and uncles.

The three of em nar definitely hopeless romantics, they just show it differently. 😍😍😍

Okay thats all for now it's almost two am and my brain is finally starting to feel tired

#house of wax 2005 #movie rant #anotha one #am i obsessed? #yes #i don't care #bo sinclair #lester sinclair #vincent sinclair #trudy sinclair #Victor Sinclair #brian van holt #damon herriman

[hypmicdaydreams]

Hello there! Can i please have ☢, ❤, ☾, ❣ for Samatoki, Sasara and Rio? You can erase into 2emoji and 2characters if its too much. This its my first time requesting something like this, so i hope its okay!

Im sorry if this too much for first ask, you can ingored it if you want, im sorry if its bother you too requesting too much ><!

I hopt you have great days and kept health and safe!

Hi hi anon! This isn't too much so dw about it! They were super fun to write, so I hope you enjoy them as well! Hope you're taking care of yourself and staying safe as well 💕💕

hc prompts: samatoki aohitsugi, rio busujima, sasara nurude

Samatoki Aohitsugi

☢ : Describe a thought or dream that would cause them to have a mental meltdown.

Samatoki can certainly be a pretty thick-skinned (?) individual, despite quite the temper he may have. There are definitely things that get under his skin and bug him to no end, but I wouldn't go so far as to say that it affects him to such an extent. He usually doesn't like to show signs of weaknesses as well, at least, he considered them such, so Samatoki really doesn't like it when something eats at him so.

There's surely one thought or dream that gets him each time, however, and it usually pertains to his last remaining family, his sister. As of now, it seems like Samatoki's biggest motive is to work hard to bring his sister back or at least to see her again. So each time he thinks about the possibility of that not happening, of being too weak to protect his younger sister despite being the older brother and only family, does irritate him to no end. Samatoki absolutely hates powerlessness, and to be constantly reminded of that, of how powerless he truly was as he can't even protect his own sister, who may not even come back, does upset him. And perhaps he's even had a few nightmares about that as well, always managing to leave him shaken afterwards from how realistic they seem. They were feelings he absolutely hated yet seemingly had no control over, which only made him despise them all the more.

❤ : Describe a physical action that shows complete trust.

Here

☾ : On a sleepless night, what would they be found doing?

Samatoki does have his fair share of sleepless nights, whether because he simply wasn't tired or that he just can't seem to fall asleep no matter how hard he tried, and they usually ended all the same. He spent most of them laying in bed, irritated that he couldn't sleep and knowing damn well how tired he'd be the next day (if anyone tried him I swear he'd be at their throat given how sleep-deprived he was). He'd toss and turn, trying to find a comfortable position, and eventually give up and just try to force himself to fall asleep by closing his eyes, but them getting even more annoyed when that didn't work. He even began to see shapes on the ceiling despite the pitch darkness.

Some nights, however, Samatoki would sit on his porch and smoke a cigarette or two if he couldn't sleep, usually if he was antsy over something (he never liked to admit that) and simply observe the still night. It always did manage to calm him down, the chill night breeze that blew past and the stench of smoke he was all too accustomed to. It always did ease his worries and perhaps even make him somewhat tired (yes, smoking had the opposite effect and oftentimes only made him stay up later, but the fatigue that came crashing down after a smoke was very much real). There really was something about the night and its stillness that Samatoki loved. At times like this, Samatoki often wondered why he never paid much attention to the night.

❣: Describe a way that will earn affection (whether platonic or romantic) from them.

Here

Rio Busujima

☢ : Describe a thought or dream that would cause them to have a mental meltdown.

Rio honestly has a pretty solid, steel mindset. Rarely does anything affect him all that much, if at all really. Perhaps it was a result from his time in the army in which he became "immune," in a sense, to almost everything, though that certainly didn't mean that nothing affected him at all. He never does visibly express such emotions as well, so on the outside, Rio does appear to be rather cool and collected, though internally, he very well could be a bit of a mess, though perhaps not too much since Rio does seem like the type to be able to calm his emotions rather easily.

Rio is very big on maintaining friendships; they were some of the most important ties and bonds to him after all. His main goal, from what we've seen so far, is to save his chief commander from the military, someone of which he has very strong bonds to. Perhaps the thought or nightmare that always does get him is him losing his friends or failing them, to have them leave or give up on him. He does value their bonds after all, so I don't think it's too far-fetched. And Rio does live alone in the woods, so I like to think that they are what help him feel less lonely and understood; I do think he needs a bit of human connection after all, though maybe not too much. So the thought of failing his friends, of doing something to them, surely breaks his heart. It felt as if he betrayed them and broke that special trust they had between them, and as a soldier who values loyalty, he'd certainly feel ashamed of himself. So I do like to think that his biggest nightmare would be losing those he cares for and trusted or even betray them and lose their trust in some way, though surely accidentally.

❤ : Describe a physical action that shows complete trust.

Rio isn't much of a physical person, I assume, and tends to keep to himself, so it can probably be difficult to tell what actions of his show complete trust. But Rio does value trust a lot in a relationship, perhaps his priority even, what he looks for. In order to be close to someone, he needs to be able to trust them, through thick and thin.

Since I don't think Rio is too keen on physical touch (not like in a touch-repulsed way though. I like to think that it's just something he's not exactly used to), maybe any sort of physical touch conveys a sense of trust. Being a soldier, Rio doesn't let just anyone get too close to him and invade his space - I'm sure that's something he was conditioned with - so it's rare to have him get physically close to one another and let his guard down, even if it was something as small as a pat on the shoulder. So really, any small physical action conveys a sense of trust in that person to Rio, since he doesn't usually get too close to anyone or let his guard down. For him to be able to do so in front of another, to metaphorically "show his back" or get close, surely meant that Rio trusted that person a lot.

☾ : On a sleepless night, what would they be found doing?

Rio, to me, seems like the type that doesn't need too much sleep to get through the day but can also sleep rather easily, at his will even. So it isn't too often, if at all, that he has sleepless nights. If he does, Rio is usually the one that makes it so, staying up until the crack of dawn out of his own will. I'm sure sleepless nights were much more prominent for him back in his military days, and thus, had to learn how to fall asleep quickly, a tactic he still uses. Rio doesn't have much experience with sleepless nights really.

On nights he can't sleep, however, Rio is probably on lookout for his camp, like he always is to be honest. Or he's working on his own things in the dark, such as making his own devices or crafting something out of sheer boredom or creativity. He usually does have a small fire going on too, and I assume he just spends his nights like how he spends his days. There isn't too much of a difference. The night, however, is also a time he likes to try new things and experiment, so if he has a sleepless night, it's possible that it's because he was staying up and working on something new, or perhaps simply had an eerie feeling and was on high alert. At times, however, Rio probably does simply sit around the fire he built and contemplate on a few things or so, maybe think about how he'll save his commander or how the next drb is going to be like. For some reason though, it does take a while for him to tire out and eventually retire for the night, which could perhaps even be at the brink of morning light.

❣: Describe a way that will earn affection (whether platonic or romantic) from them.

As I've said before, Rio highly values his relationships and lasting bonds, so he's usually only affectionate to those he considers as such. He can be quite the defensive fellow around others, especially if he doesn't know or completely trust them, so Rio would always have his guard up, or at least, not be too open to them.

He also isn't too good with verbal or physical affection, so it usually comes in the form of acts or quality time. Honestly, I think that he's the type that'd show affection first without the other needing to do anything, especially if the two were friends given that Rio had a deep fondness for them. All one had to do was really spend time with Rio and show that they trusted him, show that they thought of him as a friend as well, in the same light as he did. And Rio would show great hospitality and affection, whether it was treating them to his cooking (how could they refuse when he was so excited about it?) or, maybe if they were his s/o, even making them little gifts and trinkets from tree branches (ah how cute would it be if he could sculpt from wood using one of his knives? I like to think of it as a possibility). Rio may not be the overtly physically or verbally affectionate type, but he certainly has other ways of showing it.

Sasara Nurude

☢ : Describe a thought or dream that would cause them to have a mental meltdown.

Sasara isn't too good at reading other's or taking into account their emotions and all (not that he does it on purpose, of course), which can often lead to many failed or distanced relationships, as signified by his past. And for Sasara, I think loneliess is one thought that sort of sends him down a spiral. Sasara hated being lonely or having anyone "abandon" him, in a sense. Basically, he hated losing anyone he considered close, such as acquaintances, friends, family, etc.

Perhaps it stemmed from his childhood as well, watching his parents argue and get a divorce. He remembered those feelings all too well, that sorta deep pit in his stomach when he overheard the news. The thought of any one of his parents leaving absolutely tore Sasara apart, and perhaps from then on he always did want to try and bring people together, to always have those he cherished by his side. Yet, no matter how much he tried, their was always a voice in Sasara's head that told him that eventually everyone would leave just like with his parents, just like with Rosho. And Sasara hated that loneliness so much; he felt that same pit again each time he had that thought or dreamt that dream. They were always hard to deal with or a bit difficult to break out of that mindset, as much as he tried to do so.

❤ : Describe a physical action that shows complete trust.

Sasara can be quite touchy at times, though that's really only to those he's close to or considers as someone important. He may seem like a bit of an airhead at times, maybe, but Sasara definitely doesn't trust others easily. He can be rather observant actually, and Sasara finds that he actually doesn't trust others a lot, preferring to do things himself or keep reserved, unless it's someone he actually feels like he can trust though, having observed just how trustworthy they were.

As aforementioned, Sasara can be quite touchy, stuck to the shoulder at times if you will. He's always there by your side, whether you wanted it or not really, such as patting your shoulder or even being playful and sitting wayyy too close to you, his shoulder touching yours, as you guys hung out. It certainly does seem like he has no concept of personal space when he's in a joke-y mood with those he trusted. Basically, he can be rather clingy, in more ways than one. It's possible that it ties back to his fear of abandonment or loneliness, I suppose, as Sasara always did want to be by those he loved and trusted, wanting to spend as much time as possible with them. So when Sasara is able to trust someone, finds someone else he can spend time with and feel close to, then he latches on.

☾ : On a sleepless night, what would they be found doing?

If Sasara is ever unable to sleep, then it's most likely that he's overthinking about something or ruminating on it, more so on his fears or perhaps worries. He does have a tendency to overthink when alone, when he's allowed to. And as such, Sasara's mind is often overactive at night, especially if he's feeling down that day and a bit self-deprecating (really, it's the intrusive thoughts coming back), so he's unable to focus on sleep or simply rest. He's anxious, in a sense.

So on a sleepless night, one can find Sasara pretty much rewatching his favorite comedy shows or specials in attempt to cheer himself up and clear his mind, in order to feel better. Comedy was always something that never failed to do so, after all; it was always his escape to an extent. There was no better remedy than laughter; Sasara has even seen firsthand how effective it was. So he's sitting in his dark living room, the only light coming from the tv, hugging a pillow and laughing out loud at all of hia favorite jokes from his favorite comedians, especially the ones that inspired him in his own career. It never failed to not only relieve him of any worries or fears but also made him feel more relaxed and tired enough to go back to bed, able to peacefully sleep until it was time to get up.

❣: Describe a way that will earn affection (whether platonic or romantic) from them.

As I've said before, Sasara can be quite affectionate around someone he cared for and trusted, so it wasn't really a matter of how to receive affection from him as he'll do so either way.

But one way that'll certainly earn his affection right away is to simply show that you enjoyed his jokes or antics or whatnot. Sasara wanted to see you laugh after all or amused; that was his goal as a comedian, to make others happy, so if you laugh at his jokes, real genuine laugh, especially if you're bending over or wheezing from how hard you were laughing, then Sasara truly felt accomplished. It made him so warm, honestly, and his heart so happy. And then Sasara just gets even more clingy or affectionate, wanting to hear that laugh again.

#asks #requests #headcanon prompts #angst #fluff #hypmic #sasara nurude #samatoki aohitsugi #rio busujima

[ultrastellara]

hi i saw that you were taking requests if you aren’t anymore feel free to ignore this!! if you are then can i get a kirishima x bakugou’s sister how would bakugou react thanks and i hope you have a great day!! :)

sorry for my lateness but pls dont worry, i love getting requests! and enjoy the scenario that you wanted , lovely!

DATING KIRISHIMA AS BAKUGOU'S SISTER

kirishima x bakugou's sister reader

fluff , cuteness, & friends to lovers <3

the beginning

i think being bakugou's sister isnt that easy

bakugou wouldnt be the type of sibling to hand you the toy that you desperately wanted

he also seems the type to also make you jealous because of his grades or brag about how his quirk is way more awesome than yours

mistuki and masaru were grateful that they were able to have a daughter, so you were mostly the spoiled child out of the family

you werent snotty or arrogant because bakugou took over that job for you

between you and bakugou, you shared a two year difference

you were the kinder sibling, the one who would give the toy to bakugou

you were also the one who would give your money to bakugou if he forgot his lunch money

now when it he attended UA, you were attending middle school still

you acknowledged that bakugou was childhood friends with midoriya

you remembered all the play dates they had and the moments they shared over all might

you would always try to come into their conversations, trying to make friends with midoriya

midoriya wouldnt talk back much but when he tried to, bakugou would tell you to go away

bakugou really hated the fact that you would tried to be his friend

so he would purposely give excuses or things for you to do or go with

you didnt know he hated the idea with you hanging out with his own best friend

but he simply hated it, because he found you " annoying "

as bakugou attended UA, he would always or sometimes bring home his best friend kirishima

now let me tell you that, kirishima wasnt exactly like midoriya

kirishima would cut bakugou off if he tried telling you to go back to your room

but you just wanted to make friends that's all

kirishima wasnt the type to ignore what you wanted to say

he would actually listen to you and chat with you

" so are you also a fan of all might, kirishima ?" you asked

" hmm not really but crimson riot is my favorite hero!" he said cheerfully

bakugou would always leave the room whenever you two talked

the only time where you didnt talk to kirishima was when bakugou and him would have study sessions in his room

you would stop by once in a while to give them food or drinks

sometimes you'll chat with kirishima but very minimal

you respected him and he respected you too

on days where him and bakugou arent studying they're probably playing games

now during those times you would always stay in bakugou's room just to talk to kirishima about the things you learned in school that day

did bakugou get irritated? yeah

but he wouldnt bother you and kirishima, since he felt okay with you hanging out with his best friend

during their game sessions , you would always be next to kirishima watching him as he played the game

your eyes would be focused on the screen, however once in a while you would look at kirishima and admire his face

you thought no one in the room would notice this small habit

until you caught bakugou giving you a disgusted look

the look of ' stop looking at him you're being so fucking weird '

you would always give him back a happy smile to just piss bakugou off but you didnt stop this habit after that encounter

ever since that encounter of just looking at kirishima, you slowly started to want to see him everyday

it didnt scare or catch bakugou off guard because he only viewed you and kirishima as friends too

kirishima never saw you annoying or stupid like how bakugou did

" hey katsuki, is kirishima coming today?" you ask as you're standing near his doorway

" yeah, what about it dumbie?" he would annoyingly reply

" oh nothing just asking that's all " you would run off to your room and waited for kirishima

the middle

bakugou would be hella honest to kirishima about how you are as his sister

honestly kirishima did see you like the way bakugou did

annoying, clingy, and stupid

until the first day he was able to meet you and get to know you as bakugou's sister

boy was bakugou wrong about you

you werent all the things bakugou had told him, he found you fun and kind

you were fun to talk to about heroes you both admired

your kindness when you would always bring him and bakugou their snack and drinks

those traits of you really did catch him off guard

as he got to learn more about you, he found more things he slowly wished he could spend more time with

your beauty was one of them, you had a bright smile whenever you said hello to him

that cheerful laugh and your adorable blush whenever kirishima would compliment about the outfit you had that day

slowly as time passed, he was finding you more as a person than just the title ' bakugou's sister '

as it hit his third year at being UA, you started to attend UA like your brother

he would usually see you hanging out with your friends in the hallways

it was your first year at UA, you werent like the girl that kirishima knew years ago

you still had that smile and laugh but your personality had expanded beautifully

you would hang out with the bakusquad sometimes

you still had cling onto kirishima talking to him like you usually would

you and kirishima have grown closer and could be best friends too

bakugou didnt really care for you hanging out with kirishima since he realized that no matter what he could do you would always find your ways to the shark boy

your friends at UA were suspicious when you told them that you were friends with kirishima

countless times you would always drag your friend over to you while you would follow around your brother and kirishima

they would hear and see the conversations and many interactions that you and kirishima had

they did think that your bond with him was adorable since he was your upperclassman until later on in the year

they wanted to tell you what they had thought of you and him because let's be real, they were sorta tired of this obliviousness between you and kirishima

" you know y/n, you and kirishima seem pretty close to be best friends" your friend said

" yeah i mean i known him since i was in middle school" you stated

your friend gave you a curious look with a head tilt

" what i meant was that im started to think you might have feelings for him. i know you both dont flirt openly but just the way that he looks at you, it seems like hes giving you the look of ' hey youre cute and maybe you and i could be closer than before "they stated

now that changed your view of kirishima

let's just say your friend mightve been right about you and kirishima

the next following week, whenever you had seen him in the hallways or even just think of kirishima

your heart would always beat rapidly

your cheeks were usually flushed with pink and bits of red

you were always all over the place with the conversations you had with him

things were slowly changing of how you looked at him

you never thought of liking him because you didnt see him as a person for you to end up with

you had an ideal type but

i think your ideal type was the definition of kirishima written all over it

kirishima noticed your small changes in how you talked to him but he didn't think of your blushing too much

he understood that you were going through puberty so maybe it was just a normal thing for girls to do with guys

it wasnt until he heard your friend talking to you about kirishima

" im not sure, i feel like me liking or possibly liking kirishima... i think maybe it wont work out.." your voice was spoken softly

" maybe but you never know until you try. i get that he is a upperclassman and that many girls could be after him but he is your brother's best friend and your best friend too. if you really like him, i think you should go for it. unless hes taken but seeing the times hes been hanging out with you i doubt he has a partner" he heard them saying.

she likes me ? he thought to himself with red hues coming onto his cheeks

he felt bad for dropping in to hear your conversation about him but he couldnt help himself but think more of this

he knew that you were younger than him but he never saw you in a sisterly way

he always looked at you as a person or more specifically a woman

he didnt mind thinking of you liking him however the only part of him that got him wanting to stop having you on his mind was that

how would it work out ?

and how would bakugou react?

he really wanted to talk to you about it but seeing how uncertain you were about these feelings for him, he decided to try to get your attention and see that he too, had possible feelings for you

the pining

ever since he heard that conversation between you and your friend

he would subtlety leave you small hints

sometimes he would ask if he could take your backpack and hold it for you

during the study sessions between him and bakugou, whenever you would come into their dorm room ( with mr aizawa's permission ) he would ask if he could lean against your shoulder when he would get tired from the countless hours of studying

you would always say yes to his offers

you said yes to it because one, you were having crazy feelings for him but two, you thought it was really sweet of him to ask you for these things

you never had any other guy to ask you these offers, kirishima was the first one

as these small interactions started to happen, you caught yourself hearing a conversation between kirishima and bakugou

" you like my sister ?" bakugou asked.

" uhh...what made you think that?" kirishima nervously asked.

you were hiding from the corner away from the hallway where your brother and kirishima stood.

" oi, shitty hair its fucking obvious" he states.

" haha...how did you know ?" Kirishima nervously replied with a fear of look on his face.

" come on you and my sister, i see the way you look at her and the interactions you have with her. i mean im fine with you to date her but shitty hair, if you hurt her feelings or hurt her in anyway i will blast you " bakugou leans in closely to kirishima, giving him a glare.

" so uh most importantly you're okay with me wanting to date your sister ?"

" yeah as long you treat her right shitty hair"

after that conversation with bakugou and kirishima, your face was really red

the confession

kirishima's confession to you was simple

he wanted to tell you when you and him had some alone time away from anyone else

" hey can i talk to you, y/n?" kirishima asks you.

" sure kiri!" you reply back.

kirishima leads you to the hallways where nobody was seen. his face was slowly becoming dark red and he was fidgeting with his hands.

he was nervous. you started to get sorta suspicious of him acting like this but you couldnt jump to conclusions until you heard what he had to tell you.

" you know , im not sure if you know but i wanted to tell you that i think i been liking yo-"

" i know, kiri. " you truthfully told him.

" you know what?" he asks.

" i know you like me" you smiled at him with a chuckle, " it's cute but i accidentally heard you talking to katsuki about me. i apologize for walking in to hear that but-"

you were caught off guard because the next thing you saw that was coming at you. you felt a warm hug and kiss on your forehead by him. you didn't realize he was holding you this close and had kissed you on the forehead. however your cheeks were speaking what your mouth couldn't produce.

" no please y/n, im glad you found out by then. i actually had overheard a conversation between you and your friend about me" he was looking at you with his eyes focused on your eyes," it was cute. really really cute. but since we know how we feel about each other. ill wait for you after i graduate" he states.

your eyes soften as you heard the word 'wait'. you never had experience anything like this especially finding yourself waiting for your brother's best friend to date you after you graduate UA.

" you'll wait for me? are you sure about that, kiri?" you asked him, your hands were softly caressing his cheeks.

"of course. i mean i dont think i want to give myself away to anyone else but you, y/n" he give a reassuring smile before kissing your forehead again.

" let's wait for each other okay?" he hands his pinky finger for you. you take your pinky finger out, both creating a pinky promise.

the dating and reaction of bakugou

after you graduated and became a pro hero like kirishima and your brother, bakugou

you were happily dating the hardening hero, ejiro kirishima

you both had time for each other on the weekends

movie nights would happen, cuddling sessions and sometimes even cooking sessions too

your hands were always held against his and kissed by him too

you were there for him whenever he had insecurities of his quirk

and he was there for you to lean onto when you had moments of your own insecurities too

but you both balanced each other out

your first kiss with him was shared on your half way mark to your first anniversary of dating

then by the full year mark, you both had kissed so much

you often wore his clothes and shared the things you learned from your online classes

he shared his memories at work with his agency and

it felt like the memories you and him shared when you were in middle school

now bakugou, when he first saw you both together once as a couple

as a couple i said not as " friends "

let's say that he was utterly disgusted when he saw his best friend running over to you, kissing you on the forehead

"DISGUSTING! THATS SO FUCKING GROSS JESUS CHRIST !" he had to walk away from the both of you.

he was happy for you and happy for his best friend

but mostly for you, because

he was your older brother and you were his sister but

he didnt ever want to see you hurt from his best friend

sure he bullied you and was a little brat towards you but only he could make you try or feel hurt

if it was someone else like kirishima, he would be hella disappointed in him but also would feel shitty about himself

he doesn't like admiting he cares for you and wants to protect you

but if he can protect you from a far or tell you something to prevent you from getting hurt

that's all he cared for

because from the day he saw you looking at kirishima, he knew that you had to be with his best fiend than anyone else

besides he was ok with you being next to kirishima in the past

and now hes relieved that someday his best friend will be marrying his baby sister

that's all he could care for

#bnha #bnha headcanons #bnha scenarios #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha fluff #kirishima x reader #kirishima ejirou #mha kirishima #kirishima x y/n #bakugou's sister #fluff #kirishima fluff

[h0neyjaehyun]

☁︎ 𝐊𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 ☁︎

Summary // Jeno finds out Tali's favorite skinship, and later on so do the boys.

Characters // Talia Flores + Jeno Lee (ft.Nct Dream mention. Chan, parents)

Era / Year // July 2017

Word Count //

⚠️Warning⚠️ // Mention of Alchohol abuse

So members like to give out kisses once in awhile and Tali is no different. Even tho she doesn't really do skinship, she doesn't mind giving kisses here and there mostly because thats how the people around her gave her affection when she was in her pre-teens. Lots of head kisses mostly, from adoring her to comforing her.

Something about Tali makes you want to smother her in affection. But the boys don't want to over step her boundaries so they never did, and hoping that one day Tali will give the signal that it was okay.

And the moment had come.

Its was 2017, Tali felt quite sad. Not that the boys did anything wrong its just sometimes she misses the times she can be carefree and drink. The adrenaline that she got when she was younger but she knew that she wasn't able to go back to it.

She knows drinking is bad,especially at her age which wasn't llegal drinking age, she hasn't drinked alcohol since Chan convinced her not to, and saying it was bad for her. She knew that when she was younger too but she missed the thrill, and her friends. They all kept in contact, visiting them when she is off. She just misses the affectionate that they usually gave her, but can't since it might get her in a scandal. Mostly the head kisses, and when she kisses them on the cheek, that made her feel the most loved and thats how she preferred to show her love.

Her parents never really gave her affection, it was usually her friends, and she felt comfort in those moments and safe. The boys didn't really hug her, only Haechan or Jaemin, what they usually do is just pinch her cheeks. Even tho she doesn't like the cheek pinching, she wanted kisses, but it felt weird asking that.

So she finally had the courage to just kiss one of the members cheek one day....all hell broke loose when they found out the habit.

"Jeno~" she said sleeply, tired of the comeback, she went and sat beside him. "You look tired." "Wow, thats what every girl wants to hear." Tali said sarcastically. "Sorry" Jeno laughed with his eye smile. Tali looked at him and smiled back loving his smile. She put her head on his shoulder while they were waiting for the rest of dream to get ready for bed.

She heard yelling outside knowing it was the 2 boys that have been practically fighting all summer and not getting along for only god knows what. (Or whatever figure you believe in). She tried her best to ignore it, but also wanting to get out of the dorm that she wasn't very comfortable in at the moment.

"Hey Jeno?"

"Hm?"

"Wanna go for ice cream?"

"Right now? Its the middle of the night."

Tali looked at him then looked back at the door from where all the yelling is coming from.

"Either you wanna stay here and keep hearing them scream their heads off at each other or you wanna go get ice cream and go on the roof so we can look at the stars. Either way im going."

Jeno thought about it, he didn't want to stay here, nor did he want Tali to go out alone knowing she was too stubborn to back down from not leaving.

"....Sure why not...Renjun can always handle them"

Tali nodded, not caring if she was tired she just wanted out. They left quietly without anyone noticing, and headed to the the Open 24 hours store, to grab some ice cream and snacks.

They left and Jeno almost went to the dorm forgetting that they were supposed to go to the roof but Tali pulled him to the roof. Jeno was amazed on how Tali knew about going up here, the view was so pretty, like she can read his thoughts she said. "This is my safe place these past months, the amount of fighting those two have is...terrible I just wanted to leave the bad aura and come here with you." She said looking at him with sparkles in her eyes.

Jeno looked mesmerized by her speech and her eyes, he always liked looking at them. He pulled her to the ground and they sat there in silence with only bags being moved around being the only noise.

Tali looked at him and she found comfort, he looked back at her and gave her his famous eye smile, she was so happy to see it she couldn't help but just climb on his lap and just stay there in his arms. Jeno was surprised but took the rare opportunity to hold her.

Then Tali out of habit gave him a kiss on the cheek. Jeno froze, Tali could feel the stiffness in his body. Then it clicked on what she just did. "Oh my- IM SORRY I DID THAT OUT OF HABIT, IM SORRY I MADE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE." Tali said panicked.

While Jeno still loading, Tali was about to get off his lap but thats when reality came in he held her in the same position they were before. "No no its okay, its okay as long as you don't do that to people outside the group your okay" Jeno laughed at her panicked state.

There was silence

"Wait....what do you mean out of habit?" Jeno said out of curiosity.

Tali blushed not expecting that question she laughed and said "Well when I was like 11 I developed a love for kisses, like not lip to lip more like head kisses of comfort, then the way I respond to that comfort is by giving that person a kiss on the cheek if I really really trust them.." she said while she was hiding in her red hair, she couldn't help but feel embarrassed at that confession, she didnt really like saying those cheesy things if makes her cringe or flustered.

Jeno laughed at her embarrassment. Feeling good that she trusts him, and that he is getting closer to her. "You trust me?" Jeno said cutely. Tali now flustered "Of course I trust you" she said with giggle. "Then why didn't you kiss my cheek before huh?" He said teasingly with a pout. Tali smiles at his cuteness "Because I didn't know if your were comfortable with it" she said with a smile, head tilted cutely. Jeno gushed at her.

"How about this" Jeno proposed

"How about me and you only do this hm?" Tali thought about it, she doesn't know if the members are comfortable with it and honestly doesn't wanna embarrass herself so one member is better then none.

She looked at him the a smile and said "of course!"

Jeno was happy that he got closer with Tali also that they get to have their own little thing. But he knew it wasn't gonna last long since they were probably gonna accidentally do it infront of the boys out of habit, but he is gonna take the time that he has with it.

Dream were in the waiting room. Bored out of their mind waiting for their turn to perform. So Jeno and Tali were just napping together, Jaemin visited them and he saw them together and started taking pictures.

Then Tali started waking up and looked up and saw Jaemin."Jaeminnnn" she said cutely still sleepily doing graby hands at him like a baby while Jeno was still asleep beside her, hands around her waist, his face in her hair. Jaemin couldn't resist the invitation so he layed on top of her and snuggled his face in her chest.

She wasn't expecting the face in chest but she thought eh he is injured i don't to hurt him by pushing him off and its been awhile I'll let it slide. Then Jeno woke up from all the movement

"Jaemin."

"Hm?" The boy still buried in her chest too comfortable to move.

"One why are you here and two why are you in Tali's chest?" Concerned for the girl under him since she is a small human being.

"One to visit since its been awhile, and two...its comfortable and she did the grabby hands so I couldn't resist." He said still in her chest. Jeno looked at Tali and Tali looked back at Jeno. She blinked a few times.

"Hello"

Jeno just smiled at her cute hello.

Tali looked at Jaemin who seemed to be asleep.

"Jaemin....Jaemin....JAEMIN!" Mark yelled waking up the boy. "WHAT." The boy said upset that his sleep got disturbed. "Get off of her she need to fix her clothes to perform." Mark said, Jaemin just glared at Mark "You're just jealous that Im in this position and you're not." Jaemin said getting up and started to bicker with Mark.

Tali just crawled onto Jeno's lap and both of them sat there looking at the boys just bickering with each other while the others started joining in. In the moment Tali felt at home, Jeno reminded Tali of her brother when he would hold her when something bad came up or just in general.

Jeno looked down and saw Tali seem comfortable which made him happy and out of habit he kissed her head, and in that exact moment the boys turned to Tali to ask her who gives the best cuddles and they see Tali in Jeno's lap and him giving her a head kiss.

Everything was quiet

"WHY DOES HE GET TO KISS YOU AND NOT ME!" Haechan whined while he collapsed on Tali's legs.

Tali blinked trying to figure out whats happening then she realized...he kissed my head....oh no.

Then their manager came "Its time to perform LETS GO PEOPLE." Tali and Jeno took this opportunity to book it so they looked at each other and RAN.

"COME BACK HERE WE ARE NOT FINSIHED DISCUSSING THIS!" Jaemin yelled.

All the boys laughed and then after they performed they saw Jaemin still there waiting for an explanation. Jeno and Tali looked at each other trying to figure out how to explain.

"Well?"

"Um...well you see its just...it became a habit~?" Tali said trying hard to explain without confessing the truth cause if she does, they won't stop kissing her.

"Tali." Jisung said.

"Hm?" Tali turned to Jisung

"Are you and Jeno hyung dating" Chenle said

Tali and Jeno looked at each other and they burst out laughing.

"YOu ThInk WE ArE DAtiNg!?" Jeno said laughing his ass off.

Everyone was confused not knowing what to think.

"Listen, I find comfort with head kisses when being hugged and I usually repay the person with a kiss on the cheek or a hug nothing more, its just Jeno found out by accident when we hanged out and I was sleepy, we agreed to be our thing till we slip up and do it front of you guys nothing more." Tali said giggling.

They all were in awe at the little cute confession and started to coo at her and petting her hair.

Jaemin just looked at her after the cooing and said with a betrayed face.

"YOU GAVE JENO A KISS BEFORE ME"

#nct #nct 127 #nct dream #nct u #nct additional member #nct 2020 #nct dream 8th member #nct au #nct imagines #fanfic #nct fanfic #nct female oc #nct female addition #nct female member #nct fluff #nct jeno #nct haechan #nct jaemin #nct jisung #nct mark #nct chenle #nct tali #nct 24th member #nct 22nd member

[ketchup-monthly]

Sanders Sides D&D 2

Ooh fresh take: Jan is virge’s patron and that’s why there’s beef

Also: Jan is some sort of fae related being

Jan: i need you to do something for me Virgil: no Janus: that's not how this works!! Virgil: watch me :P

Okay so I was thinking of Patton as a cleric cuz ooh healer however, Patton as a Druid makes me so happy

I want logan to have Rage

(Also that could tie nicely in an arc about Logan learning to accept feelings)

but barbarian logan is going to be a scholar again and is gonna be smort

bc hes logan. he cant be not smart

Oh I figured he’d be the bbeg that eventually joins the party (hurt/comfort baybee!)(Remus)

he was the bbeg but then joined the party as a bardbarian or just a bard

plus, actual bard who accidentally casts vicious mockery instead of bardic inspiration

Side note: please include a scene where Remus attempts to seduce the dragon

also with this second au, i can start them at like level 5 so people can multiclass

Pat as cleric/druid

gasp logan as artificer/barbarian

janus sorcerer/rogue

because basically everything but alchemist would work well with barbarian, but alchemist feels very Logan

bc mad scientist being actually mad

alchemist logan making an experimental potion and going "here im not sure what this does but im sure its fine! someone drink it"

Remus does it voluntarily, but Logan usually tries to get Roman to drink it

Virgil will occasionally drink it when he's on his last legs and is just like.....100% done with the party

remus as a wild magic path barbarian and just fucking teleporting or doing something equally ridiculous whenever he rages

Oh my god Remus with rage would be a force to be reckoned with

You gotta describe the first time he goes into a rage really dramatically

obviously virgil is trying to "escape" his patron, Janus (really just do whatever he says to not do out of spite)

Eldritch knight roman

Feywild warlock virgil

hey so in the second d&d au, should roman and remus be actual full siblings but like remus went darkside and like romans just trying to get back at him for putting a dark stain on the family name

hey hey hey what about warforged Logan? (essentially a robot)(so like "i dont feel anything" becoming real)

okay hear me out. elf roman and elf base simic hybrid remus. so like maybe the reason remus went darkside was experimentation? so like. hes elf but special

FALLEN AASIMAR VIRGIL

virgil just transforming in the middle of a combat scenario and like his eyes turn into black pits and flightless skeletal wings appear on his back and like everyone near him has to make a charisma check and like he deals extra necrotic damage

Pat is the one human stuck in a band of misfits

so with it, roman would be a full elf, and remus would be an elf that has tentacles bc octopus

So robot logan

i meant literally he doesnt feel anything

like he has all the emotions, but he doesnt physically feel the need to like eat or sleep or stuff like that

he just.....he pretend he don't have the feelings.....but he do.....he feel so much and he hides it all in his littol mechanical heart <3

plus......if he warforged, then like.....AC huge

he stands in front of friends.....he protecc...."no, i don't have feelings, i am physically incapable of affection" but he do!! he do! he take hits for them because he do!! he care so much

Bro he spouts all this and then he uses a reaction to dive in front of someone and everyone’s just like oh

LIKE ROMAN STILL BEING MEAN TO LO BC HE THINKS HE DOESNT HAVE FEELINGS BECAUSE HE DOESNT HAVE A HEART BUT HE DOES

hey hey everyone needs to grow

and logan standing up for himself and other people stepping in and saying no stop thats not right

plus if canon wont give me roman facing the consequences of his actions towards Logan......

but also Roman learning how to properly handle his own emotions and how he interacts with others

logan who doesn't view himself as anything more than a machine to be useful to others

the party giving logan love and affection until he slowly learns his own worth as a person

Roman and Logan not getting along (maybe Roman has a Lore reason to distrust Warforged, maybe not) and slowly learning to trust each other

when Logan is feeling real down or having some issue, Roman actually comes through to help him, showing how far both characters have come

Okay yes but also can we please give Roman more confidence than canon? Like I’m sooooo sick of low self esteem being played for laughs or just being really really sad

this boy is going on a mission and will slap his brother upside the head and tell him to shut tf up remus youre not a monster just come back home and he will do it alone if need be

OKAY SO WHAT IF HE ORIGINALLY WENT ON THE QUEST JUST TO STOP REMUS ONCE AND FOR ALL BC ROMAN THOUGHT HE WAS A MONSTER, BUT ALONG THE WAY, AND AFTER LOGAN, HE CAME TO REALIZE THAT NO, JUST BECAUSE REMUS (AND LOGAN) ARE DIFFERENT, THEY ARENT MONSTERS, JUST DIFFERENT

AND LIKE IN THE FINAL PUSH TO MAKE REMUS JOIN BACK WITH HIS BROTHER, ROMAN IS PROJECTING HIS OWN FEELINGS ONTO REMUS AND EVERYONE IS LIKE WOW BRO YOU GOOD THERE, BUT ITS A BIG MOMENT FOR LOGAN, ROMAN, AND REMUS

im unsure as to how, but it happened when he was an older teen/young adult. a simic scientist either picked him (read: kidnapped), or remus volunteered (potentially to escape court life, unaware what exactly the experiment was going to do to him physically

bc also, remus and roman are royalty

so like. how best to get at the nobes/royalty/rich famous people than by turning their kid into a monster

wait, wait, wait, because i'm lowkey a sucker for this trope, but i'm not sure if it fits Remus: the experiments left him with some fairly significant physical pain/uncontrolled magical reactions. through some combo of trying to deal with that and trying find a cure for his pain, he keeps like....absolutely wrecking random towns on accident but also deliberately wrecking certain places looking for either a) vengeance on the guy(s) responsible or b) someone who can make the pain stop

SO LIKE. WILD MAGIC BARBARIAN DOING WEIRD SHIT TO HIM WHENEVER HE RAGES

AND LOGAN COULD MAYBE HELP WITH THE PAIN AND SHIT

BC ALCHEMY

Yknow, for simplification purposes, we could say the True Bbeg just gave Remus lycanthropy and Remus hasn’t managed to control it yet

lycanthropy but simic shit?

Mr. I-Don't-Have-Feelings sees the poor dude in pain and also Roman in emotional pain from seeing his brother in pain and is absolutely like "i must resolve this like right now, immediately" because he definitely doesn't hate seeing his friend suffering, or his friend's brother whom he's just met

he definitely doesn't relate at all to the idea of someone else shaping your body and absolutely does not sympathize with Remus's plight

i was thinking the grappling thing and either manta glide or the ability to breathe underwater for the simic stuff, but like he doesnt have control over the tentacles yet?

Manta glide seems like we could have fun battle scenes

he just jumps off a cliff to avoid mushy talk/dealing with his actions/roman

Roman: Remus just because you're a monster and though i wish i was an only child-- Remus, jumping off a cliff: byyeeeeee Patton: Roman, look what you did! Virgil: dammit jan what did you do? Janus: why do you think i had anything to do with that? im a fae, not a genie Logan, thinking: what an asshole. i wish i could do that

oh my god Logan always being tired mentally bc he cant sleep

Oh my gosh I love that. So Remus got kidnapped super young, (from royal family) they never found him, as a result Roman had to grow up super fast (side effect: lowkey inconsiderate and forgets to ask for others input). Meanwhile, Remus was experimented on by True Bbeg and came out with some trauma and super cool additives

yep! chronic pain and ptsd and all sorts of other shit!

so like, simic hybrids are usually created when they're adults. but what if the true bbeg decided to go younger to see what would happen, and thats why remus has chronic pain and stuff

he was still growing when his genes were spliced, so hes dealing with growth plates shifting and his body maturing and puberty and body changes and stuff

Pat is going to have a lighthearted story. Im saying that now. Hes the one without all the baggage

Sure, but his parents have to lowkey be the really kind people who are surprisingly always down for violence

everyone: multiple crises Pat: y'all need help Pat: love and affection in spades for his little band of misfits

Patton (which I think would be pretty simple, honestly he might just see danger and jump in and suddenly everyone in the party has Feelings)

Logan

Mhm. So how did he grow up? Was he just poof created? Wait

What if he was created by the king?

To make up for remuss disappearance

wait, wait....angst......he was created to fight (hence the barbarian stuff) but alchemy is his real passion

wait so like. a second son???

hes there to replace remus?

Yea! (But like in a sympathetic grief way) But that causes a bit of a complex in Roman and ergo Roman and Logan have a bit of a beef

okay so like. hes there to be a companion for roman, and like take remus' place, even though hes not actually in line for the throne?

LOGAN AS A KNIGHT

and just......the conflict of being created for a specific purpose (plus being, you know, robot and technically incapable of deviated from said purpose) vs the fact that he actually does have independent consciousness and like....wants to live life for himself

the parents made Logan a barbarian in hopes that him and Roman would be safe

okay. so logan was created by the king with the sole purpose to take remus' place as romans brother/companion, and to be his like guard? protector? and fight, but logan wants to be an alchemist and study shit

wait, wait, wait.....thinks about Asimov's Laws

he.....his first operative is protect (specifically protect Roman)

oh man. so hes literally just a shield

his second level operative is just like.....care for Roman's emotional well-being, but he doesn't really know emotions because he was kinda just spawned and nobody told him how

and he just....kind of....lets Roman treat him like garbage and take all his grief out on him because he's staunchly in denial of both having feelings or knowing how they work

Anyway Yea so Logan created by royal family in place of Remus which created angst between the two “brothers” and identity issues in Logan. Their arcs are learning how to healthily process emotions plus Roman apology and Logan commits to alchemy

So big question: why did virge make a deal?

Tricked

he gave janus his name

and instead of janus like killing him or whatever the fae do to people who break the rules of dealing with the fae, jan was like. hey. i'll give you magic, but do what i say

Janus is lawful neutral, but leans towards being selfish

hes self serving, but he has a strong set of morals and rules he follows

Tho I want to Virgil to also not be pushover so let’s say loophole happened and Jan has to stay with virge (hence why Jan is a part of the party)

okay so a couple of the rules are dont give a fae your true name and don't try to figure out their true name

So

what if virgil accidentally gave up part of his true name, and got stuck in the deal, but then figured out janus' true name

so in the same vein that janus had control over virgil, virgil now has more control over janus

he still gets his magic from janus, so he cant break free completely, but virgil has more freedom and can occasionally tell janus what to do or when to shove it

there should a running gag where virge can explain how he learned Jan’s true name but Jan can make something loudly censor him every time

(he learned his name bc once he heard janus practicing his evil genius voice and talking to himself in the mirror and janus said his true name)

so maybe janus sent virgil on the quest to protect a town or stop something related to remus, but virgil dragged him along

he might just be trying to protect a town thats close to a ley line, or something fae-related, and they just happen upon the whole thing

janus is selfish. but lawful vs chaotic is where he comes through, in morals vs doing whatever. janus has a strong set of loyalties to the fae, and to himself

so like....Remus is just too close to Jan's stuff and he wants to take him down

Virgil is just like....exhausted and said "fine, but if i gotta do this, you're coming, too"

or at least figure out a way to protect his place, even if it doesnt mean fully taking out remus. just moving him would work for jan

Janus: virgilllllllllll hes going to mess up my magic storage locker Virgil: Jan, its empty Janus: but its mine

Yea. Remus attacks a city away from the fae: Jan: Yknow I’m gonna sit this one out Virge: oh no you don’t, get up

Or

Janus vs Janice

so his real name is Janus, but Virgil calls him Janice

Virgil: This is Janice Janice: with a “U-S” Virgil: mhm, sure Jan

I'm a big fan of just like any of the old theory name being various aliases for Jan

Damien, Dante, Ethan, Declan, etc, etc

#ss d&d 2

[simpsiren]

to have and have not.

lee taeyong x reader

“losing me is better than losing you.” - losing you, wonho

main masterlist

description. being close friends with the leader of one of the biggest korean gangs in the underworld wasnt already tough, a big situation falls into your laps that only makes your bond with him even stronger, and maybe perhaps having love to bloom in the process.

genre. mafia au, fwb to lovers au,

warnings. none except for a lot of shooting cudndn

word count. 6,733

a/n. here's a taeyong x reader ff i came up with. its not much but i still hope youll enjoy it :D

lee taeyong. most people, or rather regular people would have a shiver sent down their spine if they heard this name, even if they didnt know how the man looked like. taeyong was, and still currently is very well known in the underworld, but above it as well. he's a well known gang leader amongst all the other gangs that work under one man, mr david chong. basically the mafia boss trumping above all gangs. the police have never been able to catch him, no matter how hard they tried. the policemen would either get shot and killed one by one due to his great ability of using a mere pistol, or would just be killed by taeyong's gang members before taeyong would even appear in their sight. all in all, lee taeyong was a scary man in many ways. not to you though. you found him interesting.

when you were caught hostage by one of the gangs along with one other women you didnt know, and you have the great lee taeyong to get you out of there and have you work under him for debt in a way, you did owe him a lot when a bullet was mere seconds awayfrom going through your brain. you found out that the women who know work under taeyong as well is named val. now, you didnt have much work to do honestly, you would be lounging around in the arcade basement most of the time. you were only told to do small tasks that wasnt that horrifying in any way.

"im dying of boredom!" you whined as you sat up from the very comfortable velvrt couch and faced yuta, who was off duty for tonight. "doesnt boss have anything he needs me to do? i wonder why he even took me in" you folded your arms and rolled your eyes as you let your body slouch and sink into couch. "no one is doing anything right now M. the boss is trying to plan something big from what i hear." yuta shrugged as he took a sip of his vodka. all the members in the gang call you either mal or m, it was a shortened version of your long second name malvisko and you liked being called mal. "yeah well fuck that. im gonna go sleep." you stood up from the couch and waved a small goodbye to yuta before exiting the arcade basement to head to your bedroom, or not.

you tip toed across the halls, making sure no one sees the fact that youre slowly making your way to the boss's office. you arrived at the door without being seem by anyone and right before you were about to open the door, you see jaehyun, taeyong’s right hand man. you looked up to meet his gaze. “you’re here to see mr lee?” you nodded slowly, intimidated by how cold he looks, but no one can beat the gaze of taeyong. “he’s currently feeling stress. try to calm him down a little.” he pats your shoulder before walking past you and disappearing into the hallway. the only person who knows your true relationship with taeyong was jaehyun, and you consider him to be a friend more than a colleague.

you stepped into the room and closed the door behind you. you see taeyong behind his desk with his laptop. he wore his wearing casual attire, which was a hoodie and sweatpants, along with his glasses. you see papers scattered across the table. you slowly walked up to stand beside taeyong. “hey, tae. how’s work going for you?” you placed your hand underneath taeyong’s chin and kisses his cheek lightly. taeyong sighed and took off his glasses and rubbed his temples. “almost all gangs are now working under bishop. what’s worse is that he’s working for that idiot david chong.”

you placed both your hands on his shoulders and massaged them gently as you bit your lip, not entirely sure of what to say. “that sounds pressurising.” you whispered. taeyong scoffed in response. “im going to take revenge on them for killing my brother. he wasnt even involved in this shitshow. ill figure something out.”

you knew about taeyong’s past. you knew that he has worked under mr david chong since he was little but decided rebel, leaving to start his own gang. but now, mr david chong wants him back and will do anything to do so. taeyong is a “precious specimen” as what mr david chong kept calling him. a man who was extremely smart and living in a monstrous world, he did everything he could to survive. it only made his instincts so much stronger. taeyong was like a wild beast in a wild forest, not many were able beat him. you felt honourable for the fact that taeyong lets you know his past. the other members know about it as well, but not as much as you did.

“rest tonight, tae. i want you to sleep.” you leaned forward from behind and whispered into his ear, gently planting light kisses down his neck. taeyong sighed once more and pulled your hand from your shoulder and turned his chair to face you. taeyong pulls you to sit on his lap. “now’s not the time to be doing stuff like that. im sure you know that well.” taeyong glares at you with his piercingly dangerous eyes. you giggled softly, resting your hands on his chest. "i was just advising you to rest, nothing more." you winked teasingly. taeyong scoffed in response and made you stand up. he walked past you and towards the bed, falling onto it almost instantly. you followed suit and sat beside him at the edge of the bed. "youre right. i have a ton of things to do tomorrow." taeyong covers his eyes with his forearm. "im having jaehyun guard you while im away too. its getting dangerous with a whole army of high ranked psychos coming for me. theyll definitely go for those i most treasure before capturing me."

you took a deep breath. "be careful alright? come back to me safe." taeyong chuckled, shaking his head as he sat up straight, going close to you and pecking your lips. "cant exactly do that without having either a bullet in me or a broken rib, but ill come back alive." taeyong wraps his arm around you and pulls you in for a quick kiss before pulling away. "now go. i dont want my men suspecting anything." you nodded and stood up and walked to the door. before you walked through the door, you went back to taeyong to give one last kiss before leaving him for the night.

you were walking down the dimly lit when you suddenly bumped into someone. you looked up to notice it was jeno. one of the younger guys in the gang. "what were you doing boss's office?" jeno asked innocently. you licked your lips nervously, trying to quickly think up an answer. "its fine. i know what you are to him." jeno folded his arms as he smirked widely in a teasing manner. you quickly looked around, making sure you and him were alone. "no one is to hear that you know. im just his friend.. with benefits." you whispered to jeno. jeno giggled. "sure mal. anything you say." he mocked you. "shut it. if taeyong knows that you know he'll probably threaten you to keeo quiet. its good enough that im already warning you." you rolled your eyes and before you were about to make a turn towards another hallway, you look at jeno's way and pressed your index finger to your lip.

you headed to your room and slept as perusual. lucky for you, nothing happened to you that night. taeyong is always scaring you by saying that anyone can kidnap you in the middle of the night, at any time. but god knows taeyong would never let that happen. when you wake up in your large bedroom in your large bed, you looked towards the coffee table to see jaehyun sitting on the comfortable chair, drinking coffee and using his phone. you signalled jaehyun by coughing, making him look your way immediately. "good morning, miss." you sat up from your bed and yawned, turning your head to the full body mirror beside your bed and seeing how terrible you looked. you slipped out of your soft white mattress and grabbed the silk robe, wearing it on before walking over to the coffee table.

“i told you. you didn’t have to call me miss. im your colleague for shit.” you said as you took a seat across jaehyun. he placed the cup of coffee he had in his hand on the table. “sorry, mal. im just used to calling you miss since you have a strong relationship with taeyong.” jaehyun doesn’t look up at you as he quickly glanced his eyes over the words on the newspaper. “jeez im telling you. we’re just friends with benefit. nothing more.” you huffed and folded your arms, slouching into the seat. “by the way, apparently jeno knows about me and taeyong. just keep an eye on him.” you grabbed the cup of tea that was on the table and took a sip. “the gang will be in an uproar if word gets around” you whispered, staring down at your drink. “i will.” jaehyun simply said.

you carried on with your day. most of the gang members are out today. probably because of the big plan that taeyong is doing. he probably also has some gang members to follow him. jaehyun would be with taeyong most of the time but he needed to take care of you since taeyong trusts him with you the most. you could understand. they had a long history together.

“can we please go grocery shopping and cook homemade food? im tired of buying take out.” you whined as you stabbed the fork into the friend chicken that you ordered from kfc. jaehyun took a sip of coca cola and hummed. “im not sure if its safe mal. taeyong wouldn’t want you to be wondering around in public.” you pursed your lips. “but i have you to protect me.” you pouted at jaehyun. he raised his eyebrow in disgust and sighed. “ill call taeyong and ask him.” you shouted a loud yay which made jaehyun flinch back, using his finger to cover his ear as he rolled his eyes and took out his phone to call taeyong. you were trying to hear his conversation with taeyong at the other end of the line by placing your ear close to jaehyun’s phone. you smiled as jaehyun ended the call. “alright. get ready to go. ill wait outside the room.”

you nodded happily as closed the door when jaehyun walked out, skipping your way towards your wardrobe and picking out a simple outfit to go to the supermarket. you made sure you hair looked neat and grabbed your purse and walked out to meet jaehyun. jaehyun leads you out of the hideout and gestured you to get into the car. taeyong normally rode this car but for some reason he chose to take another one to run his errands. you waited as jaehyun gets into the driver’s seat and starts driving to the nearest supermarket.

you two arrived at the supermarket. you realised that it wasnt at all crowded since it was practically 3am in the morning. you only see a few high school students around buying a snack and headed out in a flash. jaehyun helped with pushing the trolley while you picked out ingredients to make jjajangmyeon. you figured that it would be best to make a big batch so that the rest could be saved as leftovers for the other members when they come back in the morning for breakfast. jaehyun kindly offered to pay and the both of you headed out of the supermarket, with jaehyun carrying the groceries.

“thanks for taking me out. its nice to take in some fresh air instead of being couped up in the hideout." you turned towards jaehyun to give him a bright smile but later noticed that jaehyun was looking around suspiciously, his eyes scanning around his surroundings as if the scanner in his mind has detected danger somewhere near you two. you kept quiet for moment, getting scared and you slowly got close to jaehyun. "get down!" jaehyun screamed at you, dropping the groceries and he wrapped his arm around you and drags you to hide behind the car when suddenly a bullet was fired to your direction. you froze, tilting your head up to see jaehyun quickly pulling out his gun from his back pocket, arms streched out to the ground, ready to shoot any second. "its a fucking sniper." jaehyun whispered to you as he looked up towards the buuildings oposite the car, trying to find which building the sniper was stationed at. you didnt know what to do, you were afraid, scared, many feelings were flowing through you. all you could do was look down at the ground, and trust jaehyun with whatever he was doing.

"we're going to get in the car and im going to drive us out of here before the sniper can take another hit, got it? just get into the car as quick as possible and duck down. make sure that he wont be able to see you through the window." you nodded as you quickly processed jaehyun's instructions. "on my signal." jaehyun had his eyes glued on the tall buildings, it was late at night so you could barely see anything, you could never imagine how jaehyun was even able to spot the sniper.

"now!" you immdiately opened the door and got inside the car, closing the door and ducking your body down so as to not be see through the winodw. jaehyun hopped into the driver's seat in a flash and started up the car. you were panting nervously as you felt the car moving at high speed. you heard another bullet being shot at the back of the car. you whinced as you tilted your head up to see jaehyun with his phone beside him, his phone being placed on speaker mode as he called taeyong. "something happened. a sniper tried to shot mal. im heading back to the hideout now." jaehyun said. you heard taeyong shouting a loud 'fuck' before hanging up the call. jaehyun kept silent as he drove you back to the hideout in full speed. in less than 10 minutes, the car was put to a stop. you hugged your purse and you started slowly sitting back up. you looked at jaehyun, who's head and eyes were scanning the area again. jaehyun got out the car and walked to your door, opening it and signaled you to get out, you continues hugging you purse to your chest tightly as you quickly ran towards the hideout and got inside, with jaehyun following you behind.

you took deep breaths and watched jaehyun you looked extremely wary yet calm and collected. you were almost killed and jaehyun looked chill, although you doubt he felt like it. "taeyong's coming. wait for him in the main area." you folowed his instructions and took a seat in the couch of the main area, which basically consisted of a single couch and a very large table. the main area is where everyone would gather if they needed to plan something together, like breaking into a house and sorting out the escape routes etc. you werent part of those meetings but you were always there at the doorframe to see what taeyong and the others were talking about.

you took out your phone, not seeing any messages. you sighed and shoved your phone bac into your purse. it didnt take long for taeyong to come rushing through the door and placing himself on the couch, sitting down beside you and hugging you tightly. you nervously placed your arms around him, seeing the other members aloqly coming into the room. you let out a soft 'uh' into taeyong's ear, signalling taeyong to pull away from you since there were many eyes on you, wierded out that taeyong is being way too touchy with a gang member.

taeyong immediately noticed you hint and pulled away, coughing as he walked toward the huge table and slammed bot his arms down. "bishop is coming, in no time, theyll find out about our hideout and attack." the gang members begin to gather around the table. jaehyun however was standing with his arms folded behind the couch. "splint into groups and disperse. we cant be gathering in big groups like this. leaders take charge." you see the leaders of the sub groups, which were taeil, winwin and johnny nodding their heads to their boss. "those under me. stay low. dont do anything reckless. although it applies to everyone so." taeyong shrugged and sighed, rubbing his temples. "okay thats all. everyone head out tomorrow morning. im calling the leaders in the future to give further orders."

everyone said their goodbyes and exited the room one by one. jaehyu was the last one to stand at the door and before heading out, he gave a look to taeyong, which taeyong responded with a nod and walked out, closing the door behind hi and leaving you and taeyong alone in the main area. taeyong turned towards you and took a seat beside you, looking at you up and down. "im so glad youre safe." taeyog brings his hand uo to cup your cheek and frowned slightly and hugged him tight, digging your face into his chest. taeyong held you close and strokes your hair slowly and placed a kiss on the top of your head. "im not gonna let you go out without me or jaehyun anyore. i cnt imagine what woud happen if you went out alone." taeyong whispered as he pulled away, looking at your face before pulling you into a deep kiss. he pulled himself away from you. "you must be shock from that. im letting you sleep in my room."

you nodded slowly and stood up, following taeyong out of the main area and to his bedroom, which is basically his office. he lets you go inside first and closed the door behind him. he immediately unbottoned his white button up shirt, taking it off and throwing it at the edge of the bed and took a seat on the bed. "why are you so dressed up? you only went to the supermarket." taeyong commented as his eyes scanned you up and down, your outfit looking too bold for going somewhere simple in the middle of the night. "its not often i get to go out of this place. i just wanted to look good." yoy stripped your clothes off till you were in your bra and underwear. you placed your clothes where taeyong's shirt was and picked up his shirt to put it on. "you look nice in my shirt."

you giggled you walked over to the bed and layed down beside taeyong. taeyong cuddled you close, your leg over his and you burry your head deep into his neck. "im going to keep you safe from now on." teyong said, planting kisses on your shoulder. "thats not what a 'friend' says you know." taeyong lets out a 'tsk' before closing his eyes. "sleep," taeyong muttered. you smiled softly and kissed his cheek one last time before falling asleep. to be honest, you didnt know what was yor relationship with taeyong. for now, you only wanted to think of taeyong as your friend with benefit. besides, how can a gang keader even have time to fall in love. you were only there to comfort him, seeing his soft side. you felt that his actions says more than what your relationship with him is, but you chose to not let you imagination wonder too far. you liked taeyong, but you never wanted to interfere with his work by having a relationship with him, thinking that you would be a burden.

the next morning you woke up to see taeyong who just got out of the shower. you yawned and sat up straight, waiting taeyong who’s abs were out in the open, immediately diverting your eyes to it. “you’ve seen it plenty of times but you’re always staring at it like its your first time.” taeyong said calmly. you blinked your eyes and gaze your eyes up at taeyong who was drying his hair with a small towel. you blushed and stood up from the bed. “i cant help it.” you shrugged and begin to unbutton taeyong’s shirt which you slept in and slipped into your own clothes. before you walked out to head to your own room, taeyong pulls you to him by the waist in a swiftly motion and planted a kiss on your lips. “shower and get ready by 9 at the main area. im having a meeting which you need to be there for.” you smiled soft and interlocked your hands with his before letting go and heading out to your room.

you quickly showered and changed your outfit into a more comfortable one, merely only wearing a hoodie and sweatpants. you shoved your phone into your back pocket and and shoved your hands into the sides of your hoodie and walked your way over to the main room.

when you arrived, you see the members that are grouped to be under taeyong standing around. you noticed that taeyong has yet to arrive. you see jeno hanging around the corner with jaemin. you headed over to them, since they’re the only ones you would consider close to. “mal! how was last night? did you have fun?” jeno asked, tilting his head and grinning widely with the smile of a cheshire cat. you furrowed your eyebrows and slapped his should, making him flinch back as he let out a hiss. jaemin looked at the both of you, confused. “what happened last night?” jaemin questioned you. you shook your head with a smile. “oh its nothing. i just played cod with mark last night.” you glared at jeno who still had his smile on. you rolled your eyes and folded your arms. just how does he know everything? you thought to yourself.

you heard the door open, revealing taeyong in a ravishingly beautiful slick black suit. you clicked your tongue in amusement as you eyed him. what’s the occasion for him to be dressing this good? “great everyone’s here. let’s walk through what’s going to happen tonight.” tonight? what is taeyong going to do? is this what he worked long hours for? you listened attentively as taeyong talked about the plan to the members. you were in awe. you weren’t mentioned in the whole plan at all. why did you have to be here? “this needs to be pulled off properly if we’re going to beat that shit. got it? mal, i just need you to stay with me.” taeyong said as he turned his head to the back to face you. you widened your eyes and nodded quickly. “we head out at 12am sharp.” with that, taeyong walked out of the room, leaving everyone to do their own things.

jaemin chuckled. “this is going to be fun.” jaemin said in a sing-song tone. “the fuck is so good about killing a bunch of people jaemin?” you took your phone out to check the time, realising that they had the meeting for four hours and its already 1 in the afternoon. “its the chaos that excites me.” jaemin winked at you, laughing sinisterly and shoved his hands in his trousers and walked out with his shoulders laid back. “he’s only being sadistic. its fine.” you looked at him with a weirded out face. he snorts and jerked your arm with his elbow. “chill m. he’s just joking with you.” members slowly started going out of the main area. you decided to hang out at the arcade area.

the whole day went by quick since you were on your phone the entire time and once it was beginning to get close to 12am. the place started to get hectic with everyone preparing their guns and maing sure they have everything ready before moving out. you however, were just waiting in the main area. you figured that everyone would gather there first so you decided to get your lazy ass out of the arcade room and to the main area.

one by one, members started coming in. you see everyone, including jeno and jaemin with a pistol in hand. you have handled those before but your aiming really sucked. no one in the gang can compare to taeyong's gun skills though. his precision is so good he can shoot someone right in the center of their forehead from such long distances. he liked using old fashioned guns that were different from what the others had since he was more comfortable with it.

by 12am sharp as promised, everyone has gathered in the main area.taeyong gave one last look to all the members and everyone nodded their heads and exited the room swiftly, leaving you, taeyong and jaehyun.

"jaehyun's going to drive us to the mansion. after that, im not letting you out of my sight. got it?" you hummed in response as the three of you proceeded as planned, getting in the car immediately after getting out of the hideout and headed to david chong's mansion.

when you arrived, the car was right in front of the entrance of the mansion. you look through the window andnoticed how extravagant it looked. it looked rich, like it costed millions of dollars, but that is what to be expected from a mafia boss who has money rolling in every second. taeyong asked you to stay put in the car while jaehyun and taeyong got out of the car to talk to the two security guards that were standing at two sides of the entrance and heavily armed with multiple guns strapped on their black vests. taeyong and jaehyun were being checked by the two security guards to avoid having any guns being pointed at david chong, well that made sense.

not long after, jaehyun opened the door of the car and taeyong stood in front of you before grabbing you by the arm and getting you out. you were being pulled to the entrance. the security guards immediately scanning you up and down. "the fuck you looking at my girlfriend for? she's unarmed dont worry." taeyong hissed at them, making them click their tongues and allowing you and teyong to enter, along with jaehyun following behind. did taeyong called you his girlfriend? well that was unexpected.

upon entry, you see a huge grand room which two large sets of stairs on either side, leading and connected together to the second floor, to which a old men stepped out of the shadows of the dimly lit room. "lee taeyong. been awhile since ive seen you in the mansion." taeyong only kept silent, his seemingly cold blooded gaze on david chong. right now, taeyong looked extremely intimidating. although you werent scared by him the first time you met him, this was different. it felt as thoug even his gaze can kill soeone out of fear.

"come back home, taeyong. ill take you under my wing again, and youll live the finest life ever." david chong said. you observed him closely. you thought he looked like those males that become more ugly the more they age. "like hell i would." taeyong said. suddenly, david chong's eyes turned to you. you widened your eyes in fear, but tried to look calm and collected. "who is this beautiful and precious young lady?" he tilted his head and the smiled widly. you were disgusted by the old man was eyeing you right now. taeyong puts a hand on your shoulder. "you remember her right? the girl that your snipers tried to get." the old man started to climb down the stairs. taeyong watching his every step. david chong eventually ended up standing in front of you.

"looking up close, she's more pretty than i thought. could be of use to me." the old man come up close to you, way too close. he placed his thumb on your chin, tilting your head up and he examined your face. your eyes went to taeyong, who instantly pulled you away from him, making you stand behind him. "dont fucking touch her." the old man responded with a loud chuckle. "protective as always. i really did raise you up well." david chong kept his eyes on you. you could tell that taeyong would have ripped his neck open by now, but he kept calm regardless of the overflowing rage at how close david was getting to you.

"how about this? lets arrange a deal." david said, folding his arms in front of him as he stood a foot away from taeyong, who only stared at him fiercely. "i have the girl, and you get your freedom." you widened your eyes, gaze immediately switching from david to taeyong, constantly going back and forth. you felt jaehyun's presense from behind coming closer. "so i dont need your ugly ass and your men tailing my every move if i let her be one your your billions of prostitutes." taeyong raised and eyebrow and laughed histerically, making him look the only crazy one in the room. his eyes grew dark soon after. "try that and you wont see the light of day. though i think today is the last time you ever will." taeyong's eyes glanced to the side where it was dark and in a split second, a gun slided on the floor from the darkness and was in taeyong's arm. immediately, all the members got out from lurking in the darkness, guns all pointed towards david. however, david's men, including bishop's group, appeared on the second floor.

you looked around you in shock, overwhelmed by how much has happened in the blink of an eye. you moved back slightly, feeling jaehyun's hand on your back which made you feel a little safe. you see taeyong pointing his gun towards david's head, to which david responded with a low chuckle. "what, you want to kill me? i have many gangs under me. i could get you devoured in a second." you hear jaehyun letting out a huff as a gun was tossed to him as well. "im not that dumb please."

taeyong wraped his arm around david's neck and turned around to face biship's gang at the second floor. "move and he dies." taeyong shouted, tightening his grip on david's neck. you could tell that bishop's gang members were irritated and taken aback by what taeyong did. taeyong gestured his head towards winwin, who the signalled his gang to go up to the second floor.

"drop your guns." winwin said to the group of men. they were about to put their guns on the floor when a bullet was fired at winwin's shoulder, who immediately whinced in pain. the whole room became a chaos as bishop's gang started to attack. you froze in fear. taeyong shot david in the leg and turned around to look at you. without realising, you see jaehyun on the floor with bishop's members surrounding him. one of the men grabbed you and placed your hands behind your back, tightening his grip. you stared at taeyong with widened eyes, too scared to do anything. you tried to get away from the man's grasp, but clrly you werent strong enough to go against him. you see someone coming up from behind taeyong. "taeyong behind you!" it was too late. taeyong was knocked down unconscious. "taeyong!" you cried out, trying you best to get to taeyong, but you couldnt. you cried as you saw taeyong's body fell to the ground. you realised jaehyun was unconscious as well. it didnt take long for them to knock you out soon after realising the situation you were in.

your eyes fluttered open. you tried to move but realised you were tied up with your hands behind your back and your legs tied together as well. you looked around, trying to process where you were at. it looked like a basement of some sort. the walls looked old and moldt and there was nothing else around you other than taeyong and jaehyun. you started wondering where your other members were at. you wiggled your way towards taeyong who's body was still and wasnt that far away from you. you tried to wake him up by bumping your head on his chest. it didnt take him long to wake up. "mal. fuck they caught us." taeyong muttered under breath as he woke jaehyun up by kicking jaehyun's leg. jaehyun looked around. you saw jaehyun's ear twitch suddenly. he leaned towards the door. "they're coming." jaehyun said. the room fell silent as the door flew open, revealing david alone, walking in. "look at you. i thought you were stronger than this taeyong." david bent down to meet taeyong's eye level. taeyong turned his head away.

"so whats it going to be? the girl, or you?" david walked over to you and grabbed you by the collar and lifted you up, his head getting close to your neck and he took in your scent. you bite your lip and tilted your head away, struggling to kick him away. "smells like money to me." david chuckled. taeyong and jaehyun both hissed at him like snakes. david acted scared, letting out a "woah." sarcastically. "you got one hour to decide. also.." bishop suddenly appeared at the entrance of the door and walked over to taeyong. "pleasure seeing you again." bishop said to taeyong. "to think you would be dumb enough to team up with david. go to hell." taeyong argued. "i thinnk youre the one going to hell, when i torture you to death." bihsop instantly pulls out a night and placed it at taeyong's neck. jaehyun tried to kick it away but to no avail. "im having him torture you while you decide. have fun." with that, david dropped you back to the ground, and left the room. you heard him lock it, just great.

"now, what are we going to do with you three?" bishop romved the knife from taeyong's neck and circled around the three of you. "all we wanted to do was take david's money and bring him to the police for fuck sake." taeyong said as he rolled his eyes. "you shouldnt let me know your plan, idiot." bishop commented when he stopped behind you, pulling your hair, making you whince. "tell me, you ever had sex before?" your raised an eyebrow and kept your mouth shut. "not going to reply i see." out of nowhere, bishop connected his lips with yours and tried kissing you, but you didnt let him, still struggling to get out of his grasp. "get away from her!" taeyong shouted as jaehyun kicked bishop in the stomach with his legs. you fell down and coughed in disgust. bishop laughed, standing up and squat down infront of you. you spit in his face and stared him in the eyes. "fiesty. i see why david could have fun with her." bishop whispered. the only thing you could think about was how furious taeyong looked, his eyes burning in anger.

"well, i didnt come here to torture taeyong so, ill be on my way now." bishop suddenly carried you bridal style. you screamed taeyong and jaehyun's names as you were being carried way from them and out of the room. taeyong looked into your eyes, nodding his head as to signal that you will be fine, and that he'll find a way to get to you. you could only trust him when the door closed, removing taeyong and jaehyun out of your sight.

you didnt know where you being being carried to. you tried to stay calm, but your breathing was completely unstable. bishop noticed how you were acting. "calm down, im only keeping you for myself, i only worked with david to get my hands on you." bishop opened a door and entered the room. it was a bedroom, a good looking one at that, fitting the theme of the whole mansion. "what are you going to do with me?" you asked him, your voice cracking. bishop throws you on the bed and gets on top of you, you shivered as his hand touched your cheek, admirj g your face. "you'll find out soon, love." with that, bishop gets off the bed and walked out the room and locked you in. you looked around, trying to find any possible way to escape. there wasnt a window to escape through and you were unable to come uo with any ideas. you cried as you hugged yourself on the bed, you didnt know what to do. you were away from taeyong. who knows what could happen to you. you cried and cried till your eyes became dry and extemely red.

bishop hasnt come back for awhile now. you closed your eyes and tried to control your breathing, taking in deep breathes to try and calm yourself down, though it was very difficult. you didnt realise you were crying too much to the point where you fell asleep.

you woke up. you werent in the room this time. you looked around, you looked to be in a car. you turned to the front to see jaehyun and taeyong in the front seats, with taeyong driving. "great youre awake. we're heading home, not the hideout though." taeyong said with a monotoned voice. how did you get out? did you fell unconscious or something? you were in bishop's room the last time you were awake. you fell asleep again, too tired to think or even bother to ask yourself questions.

soon, you felt arms carrying you out the car. you fluttered your eyes open to meet taeyong's. he placed a soft kiss at the top fo your head. taeyong carried you to a rundown looking house. the wood on the walls were filled with mold, but it appeared to still be a suitabe place for a hideout. you were placed on a bed and taeyong sat down beside you. he hugged you tightly, and you hugged him back, fully embracing his presence. he plants soft kisses on your neck. you pulled yourself closer to him. "is everyone safe?" you asked with eyes of concern.taeying pulled away from you and smiled softly. "everyone is fine, a few wounded but the doctors are handling that." taeyong pulled you in your a kiss. you wrapped your arms around his neck, while his was placed securedly on your waist. taeyong pulled away and sighed. "im sorry i couldnt protect you." taeyong whispered as he grabbed your hands and places them both on your lap, rubbing your skin lightly with his thumb. you layed a kiss on the side of his lips. "its fine, i was scared, but i knew you would come for me." you smiled softly, trying not to break down again in front of taeyong to make him feel worse.

"i love you." taeyong said. you widened your eyes. "you do?" taeyong hummed and nodded his head in response. you placed your forehead against his. "so we arent friends with benefits?" you asked him again. taeyong gave you wierded out look. "since when were we friends with benefits. i thought you knew that i liked you." you chuckled softly. "you should know youre the kind of person that cant express his feelings well." you commented. taeyong only frowned, to which to kissed it away. "ill keep you safe from now on, no matter what. losing me is better than losing you." taeyong hugged you once again.

after that crazy experience you had, you learned a few things. one, that taeyong was now yours. you didnt have to hide your feelings for him, and the members were apparently happy for you two. well, taeyong would propably rage if anyone opposed it anyways. and two, that you were able to trust taeyong full heartedly. with his strength, you know that he would do anything to keep you safe.

#nct #nct 127 #nct 2020 #nct taeyong #taeyong x reader #nct scenarios #nct imagine #nct x reader #nct ff #nct au #lee taeyong #taeyong #taeyong ff #nct taeyong x reader #lee taeyong x reader

[jossambird]

This Soul of Mine Pt 2

Main Incubus Otto x Reader (Incubus Axel and Oscar x Reader in later parts!)

18+ (also in later parts)

(Mentions of Rape but only passing, as Incubus are Male Demons who feed off sex, most of them are NOT kind Swedes.)

PART 3

-

You ran your hands over your hair once more, trying to hide a yawn as you listened to Father James’ sermon.

Fuck was this boring. Of course you had to be shipped to this honky tonk town, and attend mass with your beloved aunt. There was nothing wrong with your aunt of course, you loved her to death, but you would have preferred not to be involved in any of this-

“Oh, what a beautiful passage, don’t you find Y/N?” Your aunt whispered to you, smiling a tired old smile. You loved her.

“Yes, it was very beautiful.” You acquiesced, accepting the hand she put on your knee.

It was only when your aunt stood to go greet Father James did you notice the woman sitting beside you, jumping out of your skin.

Her eyes wrinkled, sharp blue eyes surrounded by black Kohl watching you as she pushed her white hair back.

“Am I that ugly, child? I thought I looked half decent today when I stepped out.” She laughed, elegantly hiding her teeth as she laughed. You had never seen her in your life, eyes taking in as much detail as you could.

“Oh god no, Im so sorry ma’am, you surprised me is all. You look great today.” You said, hoping she wouldn’t mention any of this to your aunt, or possibly even to Father James.

Her gaze was steady and unblinking. It was terrifying, if you could honestly say so. She looked like she was reading your thoughts, or more like, not being able to with how badly she frowned.

“My, I must say, I dont recall ever meeting you here, Miss..?”

“Y/N!” You supplied, shaking the hand she offered-

Her grip on your hand turned harsh, visibly not the strength of a old lady like her-

“My, nothing? Oh what fun. Tell me child, have you met any... beings, as of late, that haven’t gotten out of your head?” She asked quietly, releasing your hand from her crushing grip, patting her dress as if she needed it.

Her words were smooth, but they cut you deep, as if she could-

“Read minds? Yes, you’ve mentioned that already, but that seems to be all.” She whispered, huffing loudly as if she was angry, sitting too close all of a sudden. You had to escape, you had to get out-

“Dear, I think you should sit down and breath. I am not going to harm you, I am only here to... guide you, we shall say.” The old woman continued, smiling as you did as told and sat back beside her, listening as Father James started his sermon again. Your aunt sat at the front, the traitor, unaware of what was happening.

“You smell like him, you know. He imprinted on you, by accident mind you, but still, it is quite dangerous for your kind.” She was smiling so widely that you were sure now that she wasn’t human, eyes brightening a bit more.

“W-what do you mean?” You tried, voice too weak to summon anything other than the whisper that escaped you. It didn’t matter though it seemed, she had heard you perfectly well, brushing back her white curls, pretending to listen to the sermon, nodding.

“Oh darling, the man you met the other night. Tall, equally white hair, most likely drop dead gorgeous?” She suddenly looked 50 years younger as she turned to look at you, red lipstick clashing with her paling white skin.

“He touched you, didn’t he?” It came out from between her lips sounding cold, but her wide fluorescent blue eyes said different, curiosity shining brightly in them. Nothing felt right. You felt like you couldn’t breath, feeling as if nothing of this was real-

“I touched him. I bumped into him and he picked me up.” You shot back, surprising her as you tried to regain a semblance of power, remembering the dazed man’s surprised and kind eyes.

“What an interesting turn of events! I must say, I am impressed. Not only have you made his brothers and the Incubi world turn upside down, your also partly invulnerable to Succubi powers.” She seriously noted, scooting closer as if she could see the answer in your eyes. Something brushed against your ankle, but you ignored it, captivated by her gaze.

Nothing of what she was saying made sense, Incubi? Succubi? Childrens tales, nothing more than a silly tale told by the church to children... right? No, it was surely the Host wafer that your aunt had given you that was rotten and poisoned you. Yeah, that was surely it.

God, if only-

“Honestly, a rotten Host wafer.” She huffed as she turned her gaze away, rolling her eyes.

“Look darling, Incubi are exactly like mortal men; stupid, handsome, and driven by sex.” She looked mentally exhausted all of a sudden, rubbing at her temples, revealing a scar on her forehead in the shape of a round. The elder woman rose gracefully, her eyes back to the now dull blue they had been at the start, combing over your form one last time.

“If you truly wish to summon him, do so through your desire for him, either for protection or for... assistance, in personal matters.. He will most likely find his way to you within the following hour. You will need him just as much as he needs you.” She finished, turning as if to leave, lingering as you watched her.

“What is that saying again? ‘Speak now or forever hold your peace’? Spit it out.”

“I- ma’am, I appreciate all of this advice.. but if I may ask... who are you?” You asked, knowing deep down what the answer was. You had felt it, felt it between your ribs, in your beating heart. Her fluorescent blue eyes and never-ending knowledge of your inner thoughts were far from normal, and so was the cigarette she magicked before your eyes, watching you as if she had just struck gold.

“I am.. The Handler. I am the Succubus Ruler of all Incubi and Succubi.” She walked away from you then, looking confidently forward as she exited the church, lighting the cigarette between the final pews.

-

-

Finally elated to be done with Father James’ sermon, you stepped out of the Church to await your aunt-

“Y/N L/N?” Came the voice of a man, smooth, young but deep, accent reminding you of-

You turned hurriedly in excitement, heart racing until your eyes met with a platinum blond haired man, resembling the man who had occupied your mind ever since. Mild disappointment floored you until the old woman’s words came to mind:

He had imprinted on you, it was dangerous for humans, this was most likely another being of his kind.

“Ouh, that hurts cutie, I can smell the disappointment from here! I simply wanted to come meet my brother’s- Hey!” Said the man, grinning like a cat until you turned and sprinted with all of your might away, away, away.

-

Otto found himself looking down at the box of homemade cookies, cringing at the Church’s name. It shouldn’t be anywhere near your name, defiling such a beautiful name like yours was a crime.

He felt petty, reaching out and dragging a long sharp nail against the sticker, careful to not cross out your own name by accident-

“Your acting ridiculous Otto.” Came Axel’s teasing voice, surprised as he watched Otto jump out of his skin for what seemed to be the 70th time this week. What was going on?

“Are you.. okay, brother? You dont seem to be well.” Axel asked after a beat, knowing he had to confront him about it. For the first time in all of their lives, Otto seemed unfocused, out of it, mind drifting and constantly asking them to repeat themselves. They didn’t mind it much, but something was wrong. It had to be-

“Im sorry Axel. I...I keep feeling this... tug, of sorts.” Otto quietly muttered as he stared down once again at the sticker, entranced. It unnerved Axel for a moment before realizing this was serious, this was important. He walked over to his brother slowly, tail swishing out of anxiousness, feeling entirely out of his depths.

“Otto?” Axel asked softly as his clawed fingers met his brothers skin, receiving no answer for a long moment.

“Go see her, maybe after you do, youll stop feeling it. Maybe shes calling for you.” Axel said after a beat, deciding to comfort him brother instead of further pushing him into despair. Even if nothing would amount from an Incubus pining for a mortal. He smirked as he watched Otto turn to him, disbelief written all over his face.

“You dont understand brother-“ Otto tried before Axel waved his hand, not wanting to listen to the ‘why’.

“No, you’re right, I really dont, but if you really think you are her soulmate, shouldn’t you be going to see her?” Axel asked his brother, smelling his despair turn into agitated excitement. He smirked, watching and listening as Otto ran out of the house.

No matter how Oscar or he felt, and no matter what happened, Axel came to a conclusion as the distinct lingering scent of Otto’s desperate yearning met his nose:

He would support his brother in his ridiculous endeavour to win your favour, no matter what.

Where was Oscar anyways?

#Incubus Swedes #Incubus Otto #the swedes #ikea mafia #tua swedes #the swedes x reader #umbrella academy swedes #tua the handler #tua axel #tua otto #tua oscar #otto x reader #Demons #jossambird fic

[loniereads]

cr: Sufficiently Advanced Magic

*spoiler warning*

Chapter 1 - 5

Chapter one

“I was prepared in a thousand different ways that didn’t matter” - Me for every test I’ve ever taken ☺️✨✨

Omg is he gonna go look for his brother 🥺 This book said found family but make it literal - side note, love the name Tristan.

I hope it’s explained as to WHY hundreds of 17 year olds are enduring a judgment to their possible death????

Imagine you’re brother going basically missing, your mom leaving, and then your dad pulling you out of school so you can prepare to possibly ✨die✨

“It could take years to grow strong enough-” 🥺 He’s going to sacrifice years of his life and risk certain death just for a chance to reunite his family is this book gonna make me cry?

I don’t like his name as much as I like his brothers but yanno whatever- how do you even say Corin

I already hate the dad??? Hello? Your first son is gone and your second could follow in his fate and you don’t even see him off?? Fuck you buddy why are book dads such assholes

“I loathed hurting people. I always had.” so i have decided that if anything happens to Corin I will kill everyone in the room and then myself. WHAT A CUTIE SWEET SOUL

If this book forces him to hurt someone I’ll riot-

Oh my gosh he hates fighting but he’s willing to fight for his brother I LOVE HEALTHY BROTHER RELATIONSHIPS they’re so pure

Corin is so nice to try to explain all of this weapon stuff and rune stuff to me like I have any idea wtf he’s talking about- he’s talking and I’m like I’m just happy to be here ☺️

I feel like the fact that he’s paying for everything he takes is important- like maybe other people just take and don’t leave anything? But he’s like here’s a coin for you scary tower~

“It was too cute to die” why do I love Corin so

What a cute ass sweet ass cinnamon roll, my god🥺

HE FELT GUILTY FOR KILLING A SHADOW SNDKDNSK I love him sm what a king

Chapter two

Why does everything he say sound so intelligent

ldmoaha not Corin having a convo with a book

It’s been too long since I read a normal romance book why did my brain just decide to ship Corin and a BOOK

Ok but him taking time to ask about his brother has me so soft

What the flip chapter 2 was so short??? ):

Chapter three

“You shouldn’t have done that” how ominous and amazing and I love it

He so casually was like OH LOOK A DEAD BODY OH LOOKIE PEOPLE

Omg is he gonna find his brother in here- OH MY

OMG HE DID AHHHHH

just... kidding. He did infact not find him.

Oh wait someone younger than him though- so is going into the tower a choice? That would make it a little better. Like you decide when you go in or? I NEED MORE INFO PLS

The word resh is growing on me

He risked his gold key on her 🥺

I love this little merry band of criminals- also just hoping the kid doesn’t yanno....die

omg Keras is out here crushing stones with his bare hands 😏 hellooooo

Wait I’m so conflicted??? I want to trust Keras and Vera but I also want to trust the book alsnsish

Vera is a whole mood I really hope she’s not like evil or just a weird thing in the tower or idk whatever I want her to stay

AWWAIT ☹️☹️☹️ They left Keras behind- that can’t be it. He’s gotta come back right? Like book person is gonna save him? Right!!??

Chapter four

VERA SUCH A BADDDDIE

This ‘kid’ they’re carrying is just making out like a bandit, he’s just getting carried through the tower 😂

WOW FUCK YOU VERA??? UH I HOPE SOMETHING KILLS HER-but not rhe kid 😔

Okay this might be a weird jump- but WHAT IF THE BOOK ENTITY ISSSSS HIS BROTHER??????????? Like the book person seems to really care if Corin lives? so it’s either just like a really caring person, OR HIS BROTHER

Pls let me be right

That would be so cool

The book entity helped him to finish the rest completely? Is this allowed? This feels not allowed

Corin: fighting monsters with criminals in a magical tower, very time sensitive needs to escape quickly

Also Corin: lemme just wrote a little diary entry ✨☺️

So obviously he’s going to get to keep his memories

Also like he got out of the tower so easily? What?

“And don’t let anyone hassle you about your attunement.” HOW VERY OMONIOUS OF YOU TO SAY

Honestly- Fuck Magnus Cadence

REPLACEMENT? What?

His childhood bestfriend is his half sister? I love that???? Instead of making them love interests they’re half siblings that’s cool as hell. We love childhood friends to siblings trope

I will reiterate, FUCK MAGNUS CADENCE

I hope we get to see their friendship bc I’m here for this trope

Chapter five

🥺 he sent the boys glove to his parents I’m so soft

Their relationship makes me so happy?? Like I love this. So they better reunite or I’ll riot

BROTHERLY RELATIONSHIPS ARE THE BESTTT

I miss Keras 🥺

I am so unsure of Sera. I do love the sudden sibling, and I really really hope they end up having a cool relationship and like she helps him find his(their) brother and hdjsjdjs

If anyone gives Corin a hard time for his attunement I’ll throw hands-

Not them earning points at their schools- All I can think about how is “10 points to gryffindor”

I love the word behooves

Can they go back into the tower already 💀 This down time is killing me. I want book entity, Keras and that boy who was unconscious the entire time back.

-side note, I absolutely love how all three of them(Keras, Corin, and Vera) were all so concerned with this unconscious boy and they literally carried him to complete safety. Who is this boy?? Will he come back? I miss him he better not be be dead. Vera can die but not unconscious boy.

I don’t know if I’m supposed to like Sera... but she’s giving me “I’m better than you because I have a better attunement” vibes and I do not like that at all so if Icneed to I will pretend to doesn’t exist.

Aw the schools has like animal representatives decisions?? CUTE UM. - there’s way too many for my brain to keep up with but I love them anyway

Not them assigning kids to basically play pranks on everyone else and tell them if they don’t find the prankster kids they lose points- what a weird ass school

“You and Patrick were practically brothers” GIRL YOU CANT SAY THINGS LIKE THAT TO SOMEONE WHO HAS AN ACTUAL BROTHER WHO IS MISSING AND/OR DEAD

-Also I know Tristen isn’t dead because like then what would be the point huh? HUH? So he’s got to be alive

Or I’ll riot.

“A walking rainstorm” idk why but that is so fucking adorable. I love my new comfort raintorm, Corin.

I can’t wait for them(Corin and Sera) to meet up with their friends and they have to explain that they’re now half siblings.

Them reminding him to not lose his little sigil pin makes me feel like he’s going to lose or forget it ummmm

Imagine getting fucking EXPELLED because you forgot your pin on your other uniform.

I feel like that would be me honestly. Are people not just...forgetful in this universe??

Ngl i would hate to be in the tortoise division

Corins attunement is lamer but his division is called the Phoenix? Like that’s so much cooler than tortoise

The fact that sera is trying to convince me the Spider division isn’t real makes me feel like she’s in it???

I know my babey Corin didn’t mean this as snarky as I would have liked him to but I love this line so much.

SARCASTIC BOYS WITH DADDY ISSUES OWN ME AND IM NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT IT

Ngl I was hoping they would have roommates- I love a good school roommate dynamic

For the third time I would like to make my opinion to be known; FUCK MAGNUS CADENCE

Why has no one made a playlist for this book on Spotify? I am throughly disappointed

Not Corin being ghosted by his book-

I wish I had half the motivation Corin has? Like it’s my boys first day of school and as soon as he gets into his room he starts studying. I would have taken a nap

Oop jk as soon as he couldn’t find the rune he was looking for he went to lay in bed.

I’m sorry what in the hell is Wyddsday??? Did I miss them explaining to hat this universe has different names for it’s days of the week?? How am I supposed to know when this is Corin? Or what day it even is currently

World building is so intricate and interesting and I absolutely live for it- but it’s literally so frustrating sometimes learning and remembering everything

Okay Sera being less irritated about her studies being interrupted because it’s Corin is cute

Fuck

I still don’t know if I’m supposed to like Sera

Tashday, Fersday, Kyrsday, Tensday, Vasday, and Wyddsday- either I can’t count or they’re missing a day. And what order do they go in? I need a calendar insert pls and thanks

Wait wait did he just run into an ex? What is this sndlsnsin “long-buried emotions”??

Oooo we get a name. Cecily Lambert

I didn’t possibly think I could relate to Corin anymore than I already do but here I am

The dorm chiefs introduce themselves to everyone? How cute and Curtis didn’t seem at all annoyed by Corin asking so many questions I love when upperclassman in books aren’t rude for no reason. It’s such a tiring trait they often have smh

I need his exams to hurry up because I would very much like to get back to the fast paced tower scenes-

I know absolutely nothing about Jin but I love him immensely

#book commentary #if you’ve read this pls dm me ☺️ #sufficiently advanced Magic #arcane ascension #uhhhhh I’ll just edit this post whenever I have thoughts

[divinevomit]

im tired

sept. 26′21 : 8am

-

thought id try a diary of sorts. cant garrentee how consistant thisll be or how literate itll be either. i cant sleep anymore without some type of medication. with or witohut caffine. im aalways tired an d it shows. when i fo sleep it sall day. never at night. the portals are opening up. tis almost october and it shows. this buildign is full of lost ghosts. i feel for them, honestly. i cant imagine being stuck ina place liek this forever. i feel liek maybe i will, one day again. be stuck somewhere for wahat seems liek too many years, watching the days pass, not knowing when or were i am anymore. seeing the passin gpoeple go by. i was once, it wasnt fun. i dont really remember it, but i know i long forit back from time to time. 

i guess i should introduce myself properly, for futiure referencee or for anyone who happens to stumble on this blog. i dont rwally know how. i guess i m kinda liek a ghost. i dont get to leave my apartment often, eithr becuase i have a bad feeling, or because i have no reason or the funds to. i have insomnia, also borderline personality, and probably a good amount of other problems. ihave a good amount of friends i guess, i live with one, (who ill call vamp for future referece),i have two friend groups, both of thm are majority odler than me, but not in a weird way, more liek by chance. anywyas, i also have an online friend, and a long distance lover. i talk to my onlin efriend more than any. ive knownhim for almost twoyears,but i dont know much about ihim. i dont know his actual name, what he looks liek, so basically nothing besides his age, his voice, and his zodiac sighn. all my friends think hes secretly 40, but hes a year younger thanme and proved it. ill probably end up talking atb him mostl.y. i mtoo tired to thikn of a different name than what i already callhim, ill think of one later. my lovr lives in the same state as my onlien friend, and not too far. theyboth live in a different state thanme and vamp. weve beentogether for two years, about 8 months off and on long distance. this is the longest weve been away from ech other at 4 months. i dont get to talk to them too often. thy dont have wifi, and theyve never had a phone with data. their family is odd and doesnt liek me either. what els do i add? ill be a legaladult in 6 months, but me and vamp basically liv aloen. my mom pays for rent and utilties, but is never around and lives with her boyfriend 12/14 days. whenshe does come by, its not good. vamp and i both dont have jobs, vamps family is across the country, and most of mine is comepletely out of the pitcture. neither of us had good childhoods but they r pretty similar. vamps was a lot more extreme thanmin e, and mine was,, easier,, to say te least. i dont know what else i should add. im very pale due to lack of goingoutsid eduring daylight hours and probably lack of nutrients but naturallu im very tane. im reely clairvoyant, liek scary clairvoyant. ican read someones mind to a t with ease, can feel others physicalpain even when im inadifferent room, adn emotions clearly. especially when i know thm, dcently just by looking at them too long. its reallu exhausting. (beleive me or not idont care, its not liek anyone will see this anywyas.) my mom is pagan (for 22yrs), and my dad is a satanist (for 42 yrs) and i am second born to them. i turned out a pagan who lieks red magic and my deity is venus aphrodite. (did yu knoew aphrodite was nonbianary?)  i refuse to do black magic or anything to mess with anyons freewll. i refuse to end up liek muy dad. my favorite color is baby pink andblack. 

me and vamp share a room. im not allowed to be alnoen because everyone thinks ill spirsl. vamp has lived with me for 4 months and, dnt get me wrong, i lvoe having him here, hes liek my brother and i cherish him forever, but i missbeing alone. jes asleep right now so im downstairs typig this. 

i have a bad habit of rambling. i talk too much. i wont read this over becaause i know itll be all ovr the place and ill just delete it. i dont really know what to use this blog for, i never really have. i go backand forth on wat to do with it, first it was aesthetics, then a dream journal and now this, but im bad at keeping p with anything and loose motivation quickly.  i might try more for tihs. but i cant promise anything, i did this on a whim. 

#1 #divinevomit #divinejournal

[miracvlovs]

✗✗✗   you see [ kaleb yıldırım ] around lately? yeah i heard that the [ cis male ] is up to no good. [ he / him ] has been here for [ five years ] now but they’re still pretty [ abrasive ] which is fine because they’re also [ debonair ] so it balances out. the [ twenty-eight ] year old [ hitman for hire ] actually looks like a lot like [ alperen duymaz ], don’t you think? it’s best to watch out, though, because it’s been said that they’re really into [ strong cigarettes & even stronger whiskey ].

hey, hello, hi, bonjour! s’up buttercups? ‘tis i, your friendly neighbourhood loser chrissie ( a.k.a an irish doofus who is utter plot trash and the actual WORST at keeping track with discord messages, oops ) and i’m super duper excited to be here among you fab human beings! anywho, this is my first kiddo kaleb and he is … how do you say … morally grey. basically his morals are very questionable in every aspect. but! on the plus side, he’s very talented and good at his job even if he is ruthless and callous, oop. he is … the worst and also lowkey messed up inside tbh so pls excuse his blunt and sarcastic nature. plot-wise i’m open to literally anything and everything so come at me with any ideas ya got! i’m always diggity down to spit ball ideas and form some dope connections so pls feel free to invade my ims or hmu on le cord ( chrissie.#9606 ) and we can brainstorm until our heart’s content! if ya wanna, go ahead and light that lil grey heart up red and i’ll shimmy my butt your way for all of the good stuff. anywho, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty, shall we?

fundamentals.

KALEB EMER YILDIRIM     —     twenty-eight, hitman for hire,   +   one snarky son of a gun   /   troubled dude with daddy issues   /   all issues tbh ! 

aesthetics   ➤   dried blood caked into the grooves of cut knuckles, the lingering scent of smoke and gasoline, silver slivers of past scarring, five o’clock shadow peppering a blunt jawline, discolourations of blue and purple decorating battered hands, a subtle smirk etched upon a devious countenance, calloused fingertips riddled with small paper cuts, dark circles under almost-black eyes, the noise of screeching tires in the middle of the night, a tall stature adorned in all-black attire, ghosts of bruises staining calloused skin green, a scuffed zippo lighter in a pack of marlboros containing only one cigarette, white shirts with the sleeves rolled up to the elbows, a sly grin under stormy dark eyes, a sniper on the roof of a deserted building, the roar of a car engine, & clenched, white-knuckled fists.

nicknames. kal.

date of birth. november third.

gender. cis male.

pronouns. he + him.

birthplace. manhattan, nyc.

orientation. bisexual + aromantic.

education. bachelor of music degree obtained from manhattan school of music.

spoken languages. can speak fluent english, turkish, spanish, & french.

negative traits. haughty, abrasive, enigmatic, cynical, temperamental, calculating, hedonistic, distant, sarcastic, & volatile.

positive traits. adept, diligent, charming, resilient, candid, adept, charming, audacious, determined, & resourceful.

strengths. efficient, energetic, self-confident, strong-willed, strategic thinker, charismatic, & inspiring.

weaknesses. stubborn, dominant, intolerant, impatient, arrogant, poor handling of emotions, cold, & ruthless.

talents. piano, retaining information, memory recall, lock-picking, carjacking, hand-to-hand combat, automobile knowledge, tracking people down, & excellent problem-solving abilities. 

physiology. dark brown eyes. dark brown hair. six feet, one inch tall. of a lean, broad stature with a straight posture and evident height. has a few silvery scars littered across his skin. has a few tattoos in a few less visible places. is ambidextrous.

psychology. scorpio zodiac. water element. slytherin house. entj-a. chaotic neutral. type eight enneagram. choleric temperament. interpersonal intelligence type. addicted to alcohol, tobacco, prescription drugs, cocaine, and cannabis. suffers from addiction and insomnia. his vices are lust, wrath and pride. his virtues are ... honestly, probably just diligence tbh.

background.

possible triggers   :   infidelity, divorce, alcoholism, drug abuse, cancer, death, car crash, funeral, blood, murder, suicide mention, gun mention, & various references to death and murder. 

a synopsis.   ah, here he is—my tol, troubled, grouchy son : ' ) don't u just adore ur resident trashy, snarky, but precious and sad fuckboi muse? bc i know I DO! anyways, before i digress, i'll cut to the chase. so, waaay before he blessed the universe with his presence, his mother ( who was originally from turkey ) moved to the states where she met one alexander hale. you can probably guess the rest: the pair married, they had children, everything seemed to be going swimmingly, yada yada. here’s a lil background: the hale family—a line of manhattan-born businessmen / lawyers / diplomats etc. they're dripping in wealth, not always as squeaky clean as they portray themselves as to be. kaleb’s dad was a douche, expected both of his sons to follow in his shadow and become lawyers, ran around behind his wife's back: the whole shoot and shebang of a classic a-hole. he always kind of ignored kaleb in favour of his eldest son joshua so kaleb kinda became hard-hearted and resentful due to the lack of his father's attention. skip a few years and he spied his dad cheating on his mother with his secretary though he refused to tell another soul for fear of any potential backlash. soon enough, his mother found this out for herself, their argument ruined his thirteenth birthday party then they divorced soon after. his mother fell off the wagon, became terminally ill—all while his father was remarrying and expecting a daughter with his secretary. it was a hella rough two years for kaleb. it got even worse. eventually, his mother passed away and his step-mother divorced his father to breeze off into the sunset with her new lover; leaving her daughter with her piss-poor excuse of a dad. at this point, kaleb was lonely and angry but adopted the role of his step-sister's protector, shielding her from their father's increasing substance abuse induced violence. just before his seventeenth birthday, his father died in a car crash. of course, he didn't entirely mourn the loss. almost immediately, he and his younger sister moved in with their elder brother who helped kaleb get into university. with dear ole dad out of the picture, he could finally pursue his interest and flair for music. after he graduated, he moved to santa ysabel with his brother and brother's family. in the beginning, things were going fine. yeah, sure, he was struggling for work and felt bad that his brother had to keep him afloat. normal stuff. then, one day, things quickly turned sour in his world. [ TRIGGER FOR GORE, BLOOD, SUICIDE MENTION, GUN MENTION, MURDER, DEATH ] he’d came home to find the locks on the doors busted, advancing into the house carefully only to find his brother’s lifeless corpse crumbled on the kitchen tiles: his throat and wrists slashed, posed as a suicide. of course, kaleb knew better. he knew his brother; knew he would never leave him or his family. upon further inspection of the house, he’d discovered the body of his wife upstairs: a bullet hole between her eyes. [ TRIGGER OVER ] the whole ordeal was enough to turn his stomach but once the sickness had subsided, all kaleb felt was a strong thirst for blood. sure, it was pretty damn stupid to try and seek revenge or whatnot ... but kaleb had always been one to let his heart guide his brain. anyways, time skip now to the moment he’d uncovered his brother’s entanglement with some dodgy loan shark, drug dealing criminals who were responsible for his murder. in the end, he’d hunted them down and eradicated them one by one, over a span of weeks. at first, he hated himself and what his desire for vengeance had turned him into but he kept going until he’d got them all: until he’d grown numb. truthfully, how he wound up taking lives for a living is beyond him. he woke up one day, found himself hired by some big-wig businessman who wanted rid of his business partner and et voilà, he was tangled up in the dark side of existence. i mean, was he blackmailed into doing his first paid hit? yes. but who can blame him? especially when they claimed to have intel regarding the sudden demise of a prominent figure in the criminal underbelly of the city, a.k.a his brother’s killer. it was a risk kaleb simply couldn’t take. he prefers to keep himself anonymous, hidden behind shadows, unsuspecting. death has become a job. nothing more. nothing less. it’s simply the algorithm of his existence: receive a dossier, take care of the target, get paid a hefty lump sum. and all just for enacting a stranger’s revenge in the blood of another. he moves like a deadly phantom, his footsteps light as a feather, whipping through the night like a bullet through a target’s skull. sartre claims that hell is other people. and if you were to stare into kaleb’s eyes—eyes eerily similar to having been cut from coal—you might just see hell and everyone in it staring right back at you. as nietzsche wrote: “ he who fights with monsters should be careful lest he thereby become a monster. and if thou gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will also gaze into thee. ”

random extras.

he has a lot of small scars over his body, most of which he can’t account for or has forgotten about.

owns and drives a black 1969 boss 429 mustang which he loves arguably more than he loves himself.

speaking of, he actually is full of self-hatred so don’t let the haughtiness fool you.

trusts nobody but himself and is loyal to nobody but himself.

has a lot of anger issues so often ends up taking part in underground fights.

he rates around a solid three on the kinsey scale.

is a distant person; closed-off emotionally and prefers to keep himself to himself.

when it comes to whether or not he is morally decent or an extremely bad person, he is somewhere in the middle of that spectrum.

he isn’t heartless but he isn’t exactly compassionate either.

kind of shady but knows how to pass himself as charming. 

has been thru sum shit n seen sum shit so he’s v messed up inside.

though he does have a soft spot for animals and children.

his marksmanship is impeccable.

he’s naturally gifted with firearms and his shot is always on point.

dark eyes and bruised knuckles are his ultimate aesthetic tbh.

actually really appreciates classical music, though he’ll never tell. blame it on his piano lessons from childhood.

speaking of piano, he’s low key gifted at playing although he rarely does these days.

has a very short fuse and can lose his temper quite easily.

he has a good heart and good intentions when it comes to those he actually cares about although he’ll never let this show.

favourite coping mechanism? isolation.

a bit of a lone wolf. he keeps people at arm’s length but acts in a way where people are under the illusion he’s their friend.

basically the tall, dark and handsome trope: ( most of the tall, dark and handsome men display aloof, cold and distant personality but they do have a gentle and caring side. )

is a little snarky and grumpy but if you manage to break this exterior, you’ll find he’s quite witty and easy going.

he got into fighting at a young age. it was the only way to try and learn how to defend himself against his father.

sleep?? he doesn’t know her.

tends to repress his emotions until he explodes.

healthy coping mechanisms?? he doesn’t know them either.

is prone to pushing the self destruct button.

you can find a pinterest board for him by clicking anywhere here.

#hey hi hello happy to be here !!! #this is my son kal n he's ... A LOT. #show this some luv n i'll come atcha for plots !!! #indulgence.intro

[mmblaq]

Ok since you obviously love Ritsu so much (honestly who doesn’t), could you please tell me how you think he feels about the other Sohma’s? I really wanna hear what you think about the character dynamics there because that’s what really drew me into loving the series. I love what you’ve written about fruits basket, keep up the good work and have a lovey day!

omg this is such a good ask, im excited to dive into this

i am going to use they/them pronouns for ritsu so that its the most neutral lol i know some people prefer he/him, some prefer she/her, and i respect all those preferences for ritsu so ill use they/them as a middle thing lol

I honestly think that ritsu probably doesnt think they have the right to dislike any of the sohmas. Even akito. Ritsu probably feels absolute dread regarding non-zodiaca outside of their parents, but when it comes to the zodiacs, i think ritsu has a pure empathetic soul that could never just not get along with someone. but let’s go thru the zodiacs (as i think their dynamics is what you wanted to hear about right? lol)

the main 4 (yes, tohru is a sohma in my head): as we have seen- shigure and ritsu have a very brother/sibling relationship. Where shigure is the older brother and ritsu is the trouble making and naive younger sibling that are a bit distant but respect each other. shigure teases the poor monkey and ritsu thinks highly of the man. Its honestly kind of a cute relationship to me even though shigure is such an ass lmaooo as for kyo, i would have loved to see ritsu lean on his shoulder or trample him like their mother did LOL kyo’s reaction would be priceless. And yuki......i feel like yuki associates ritsu with ayame and just ignores ajdjsj but ritsu doesnt seem to mind and still loves him. TOHRU AND RITSU THOUGH 💕💕💕🥺🥺😊😊 the sweetest babies!!!! absolute angels- i think they learn a lot from each other where tohru gains a deeper understanding of the sohmas and ritsu learns its okay to want to live for someone and to want a purpose in life.

Now as for kagura: i absolutely adore kagura and ritsus relationship. Afterall, kagura let ritsu wear her dresses growing up and helped them feel comfortable while figuring out their identity. I wish we would have seen them as adults interacting!! i just know kagura would be like “i just KNOW that guy looked at you wrong, you want me to key his car? stab his tires? take out his engine? what do you want me to do” and ritsu is like “UUUHhhHHHHH PLEASE DONT”

momiji and hatsuharu: i feel like momiji would be really sweet with ritsu.....like “hey ritsu, i like your kimono :-)” and ritsu would instantly cry. Hatsuharu is really respectful and also a bby so hed probably offer some of rins clothes to borrow LOL

hatori and ayame: hatori DEFINITELY knows ritsu probably the best- other than kagura and ayame maybe. hatori is very empathetic and tries to be patient with ritsu and probably does his best to keep ritsu out of akito’s mind. Now, i headcanon that ritsu eventually starts working under ayame and ventures into fashion and clothing design, and ayame would teach them how to gain confidence. I believe ayame would be the only person to never lose his temper with ritsu’s breakdowns. He would just simply override it with his own dramatics but ritsu respects and admires him so much that they’d be like “you’re right cousin ayame........” and Mine would just be like “can you guys not do this around customers PLEASE”

for rin, kisa, and hiro: post-canon rin would be supportive of ritsu and actually hang out with them! imagine tohru dragging rin along to hang out with ritsu and kagura 🥺🥺🥺 I also feel like hiro would talk mad shit to ritsu and when they get older kisa would scold him definitely. BUT remember the fanart of ritsu helping hiro put on his traditional wear? i just KNOW that they get along and ritsu loves and cares for hiro a lot like a brother. but we definitely have haru or kyo who probably smacks him when he’s rude to them LOL. Also imagine kisa braiding ritsu’s hair or doing it to match her’s 🥺

lets seee who is left. kureno! honestly have they even met?

akito: ugh ritsu is irritating me again

kureno: ........whom?

AJDJS im jk but i feel like they would actually be the sweetest together. Kureno shares many personality traits with tohru, so it’d just be kureno being his angel self and ritsu trying not to explode cuz someone is nice to them

Thank you for sending this ask! i hope i answered it well lol tbh all i think about is ritsu interacting with the sohmas and i really had to shorten some of these haha im always down to gush about ritsu!!!

#Take a shot every time i say ritsu here #fruits basket #ritsu sohma

[autumn-foxfire]

So like i think its important to acknowledge the context here for some of this. The context being that between chuuya being introduced and us getting chuuyas backstory its been A WHILE. Like for a good while i used to joke that they were really wasting chuuya cuz they had a fan favorite character who we had like no information and backstory on. Like i wanna say its been at least two years between chuuya introduction n backstory but honestly im terible with memory n even worse with time progression so all im gonna say for a very very long time the fandom didnt know shit about chuuyas backstory. The most we got in guild arc was the hint that kouyou was his mentor n of course that he n dazai formed the ace in mafias sleeve n for a long while that was pretty much it. Fans ran wild with that n everybody had their own headcanon n there were a lot of fics exploring his possible backstory. From him being a french (flashbacks to french chuuya era) immigrant/ child trafficked for his ability to him training to work in kouyous borthel (that was a popular headcanon for kouyou but i dont think it has any base in canon) until they discovered his ability and were like oooo this baby dangerous. My favorite was anything that included kouyou just picking up a half feral kid chuuya n being like ahhh im keeping this, mine now. Feral Chuuya gives me life n i still like to read about it. The point being when chuuyas backstory came out it was going to have to contend with A Lot of fan content some of which was really really good.

Anyway i dislike the whole oh there was a god shoved in him when he was a kid bit. I wont stick to this a lot cuz im honestly past the point 'ugh this is So stupid' n to the point 'i dislike it but i also dont really care' but ye, im not super big fan of throwing gods around so randomly cuz i feel bsd isnt really built with that in mind, n i considered that whole part a really boring explenation to corruption and eh, im not gonna pretend that the fanwork didnt influence me n that i might have liked it better if i didnt read so much speculative fanfiction cuz it really comes down to 'its not like in my headcanons so i hate it :/'n thats p much all there is to it n thats no fun to talk about.

I did like sheep parts tho loved dat.

No what im here to talk about is how KOUYOU GOT FUCKIN ROBBED. Like we barely get any chuuya kouyou interactions anyway despite her being shown as his mentor like how mori was to dazai n kouyou herself really only had time to shine with kyouka n like this was the perfect oportunity to explore her more. She was shown as chuuyas mentor from the start, she was included in every fanwork that included chuuyas backstory, if ur gonna do chuuyas backstory you need to have kouyou there she is his mentor after all

Nope nope what do we get instead

FUCKING RANDO SAN

LITERAL GUY NAMED RANDO

Like ok fine u needed a villain for the novel thats fine, make it the person who tried to grab chuuya out good good great BUT WHAT WAS ALL THAT SHIT ABOUT FUCKING RANDO SAN BEING THE ONE TO RECRUIT CHUUYA INTO MAFIA. WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT CHUUYAS FUCKING HAT BEING RANDOS, WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK WAS THAT SCENE OF CHUUYA SITTING ON HIS GRAVE LIKE FUCKIN DAZAI WITH ODA

WHAT THE FUCK

I will not stop yelling

Like honestly it made me so upset. I dont mind fucking rando san as a villain or whatever but i do mind him kinda being pushed into the spot of chuuyas mentor (whos kouyou) or recuiter (whos dazai) n him being tied into his character so significantly like the tradition of a mentor giving their student something is obvs a big thing in mafia what with dazais coat n all n it just made me so upset that chuuyas hat was given to him by some fuckass named rando n not kouyou. Or that rando seemed to impact him so much to be considered some sort of great influence when he p much just busted him out n then dazai did all the work. Like it just made me so upset that this random one but villain named literally rando was shoved as an important figure in a story of a character whos backstory we've been clamoring for so long when kouyou was literally right there like 'hi im here ready to be relevant forever.'

Like we already got a nice view of her with kyouka what with her wanting to protect kyouka but being willing to let her go wgen she sees thats the best for kyouka n that she will be happy n protected with the agency. Like i doubt she would be as protective with chuuya since their age difference is a lot smaller (4-5 years i think) so shed probs view him more as a friend or a younger brother than a literal child she has to protect but like i wanna see that i want them to have a bond, why hint at her being his mentor n then do nothing with it when mori is of such significance for dazai.

Like i think all this comes down to is obe of primary problems i had with bsd n one of the reasons i ended up growing tired with it: bsd really likes introducing new characters n new groups while at the same time doing very little with ones it already introduced if they arent like atsushi akutagawa dazai n sometimes kunikida n chuuya. N like that just gets boring after a bit i dont care about new evil group no 65 i care about the characters i already know so BLS DO THINGS WITH THEM BLS

...I’ll be honest, I didn’t notice that Kouyou was supposed to be Chuuya’s mentor. Did I just miss that in the anime or something? I didn’t know they had a bond at all.

As for Chuuya’s backstory, I also... didn’t really mind it either. I know the god part was a bit random but I also thought it was kind of fitting that Chuuya’s ability, or a part of it?, was born from something out of this world. It really does fit the “corruption” theme too, in my opinion, in the sense that his body has been corrupted by a god and it would also explain why his body isn’t able to handle the body too.

I also thought that the point of Rando being the one who “gave” Chuuya his hat was symbolism of Chuuya finding a piece of his past because of him and that’s why he visited his grave (almost as a silent thanks in a way). Plus I think it was another one of Dazai’s manipulation to get Chuuya into the Port Mafia, he knew he would never accept a belonging given to him by Dazai (he even pulled a face when he heard that Dazai, as his recruiter should be the one to give it) but when he learned it was Rando, a person who while had attacked him but had also helped him learn a tiny bit more about the god inside him, made accepting the hat more easier for him.

At least, that was my take on it.

I am a little disappointed myself about the lack of attention some characters have recieved compared to others (cough Kenji cough) and I wished they were given a little more, but I also understand why new criminal groups are introduced as bsd wants to draw a stalemate between the Agency and the Port Mafia.

I guess this a matter of different opinions XD

#bsd #thanks for the ask!! #thegaygyrus

[abbeyfangirl]

dragon age: all characters (companions)

I’ve been in this fandom for a hot minute now and I want to update my opinions on characters :)

Origins

Alistair: super sweet dude who literally is not the stereotypicalchantryguyfightme. He’s a great example of healthy masculinity and I totally wish he was bi because I have an entire essay on that— also: he’s a poc! His mum was brown. In game he’s got dark features. if you really want a blond/blue-eyes/white guy, make your warden that. or accept that brown people can be noble and moral. or just draw cailan, idk. just because BioWare whitewashes doesn’t mean you should.

Leliana: someone hug my singing girlfriend before I crush her under with my own hugs. Also: nugs. Yes! Shoes. Yes! She likes how I style my hair? YES!! I honestly think she’s super duper and it pisses me off whenever someone’s like: yeah she enjoys killing people and the Game. ok. and michel de chevin willingly participated in genocidal marches through the alienage he grew up in with his elvhen mum. 

Morrigan: dirty swamp witch that i stan and also have a v big crush on. tiddies. Have a son with a GW so we can raise him with our tiddies out in the forest. she’s also white-passing, as her father was chasind and all people we’ve seen that are chasind are black. therefore, she is biracial. therefore, poc can be goths and don’t shy away from giving morrigan a darker skintone. if the devs had of been thinking, she’d have a darker skintone.

Zevran: Actually is the best romance, I think. Loves consent, therefore I will stan him so hard my skull cracks a little. Also: he is a very brown boy and if he’s white in da4 I’m seriously going to throw all canon out the fucking window. genuinely a good person who needs to be told so. 

Wynne: grandma who only likes my friends who go to church. but also super sweet and I’d rest my head on her bosom (in a platonic way omg ZEVRAN)

Sten: angry quiet boi. the bestest boi. I totally would give him a kitten for a gift and bake him cookies. Thicc softie. I think if I had DA:O and i knew how to use mods i would mod the fuck outta him. sorry.

Sha(y)le: who’s gender? idk her. See also: fuck birds and authority. pound ur ass into the ground you feathery meatbag little shits. fuck songbirds.

Dog: such a good boi. thicc. thinks Alistair is a whiny fuck and is Morrigan’s only friend. love him. he’s the cutest companion. bet.

Ohgren: honestly forgot about him bcc he’s such a shitbag. also: he could’ve been a really cool addiction recovery type but NOPE. probably would have a trump shirt in a modern au and would catcall wlw and hit mlm. no thanks.

Awakening

Anders: he acts like rlly straight but he’s so gay I can smell it. also he’s rlly cute and fun and I love him so much.

Justice: MAYBE i’M selF CONSCious OF THE twitchING. is the friend that genuinely doesn’t get dick jokes but is ur 110% ride or die.

Nathaniel Howe: honestly is sort of a white knight/neck beard a little, but it’s kind of charming with his whole velanna m’lady?? grump boi. annoying soul patch that I’d mod out SO FAST—

Sigrun: would have ROMANCED the FUCK out of her. why she even entertains the idea of fucking with ohgren makes me realize most of the writers are dumbfucks.png. peppy little emo. 12/10 would die if she kissed my cheek teasingly.

Ohgren: why. why. why. I’d have brought Shayle over. Maybe Zev? Definitely Dog.

Velanna: she was written to be an annoying feminist and you can tell but I deadass am a kindred spirit with her bcc I too am deadpan annoyed with Thedas’ general population too. love her. Would’ve loved to romance her. She’d totally be one of those who’d get all tsundere and be like “n-no i hate you” *kisses the fuckin soul out of you then blushes so hard she’s now a tomato*

Dragon Age II

Anders: fuck the cops. i don’t care. fuck the cops. (vine reference). also: do i hate him for blowing up the chantry that would eventually annul a huge collection of his people? no. read dalishious’s meta on Anders. v intriguing. didn’t they retcon the fuck out of the reported deaths too? like there was like eight Templars and Elthinia in there. Templars killed more “abominations” in a day than Anders in the game canon—

Aveline: initially thought she was fine and then realized she’s shit to my lil brother and I will fucking clap her ginger ass. See also: whorephobia isn’t a joke so fuck off with treating Isabela badly, you tit.

Bethany: sunshine. Literal sunshine. I feel my freckles grow in her presence and i love it. she’s my little baby sister and I’d slam that ogre so fuckin hard before it touched either twin.

Carver: there has to be a mod where both twins survive. I love them both to bits. My babies. carver is my bitter, angry little brother and I can relate because I too am very angry and would totally clap my own ass. hes so genuine and I don’t get the competition between Beth and Carver. Like, both are fuckin stellar in different ways. In this essay I will—

Fenris: honestly, I don’t get the general hate between him and Anders. Fenris’ main arc should’ve been a recovery arc, not drunken moping and revenge. he deserves better. give him a soft sweater instead of his spikes and let him love himself as much as I love him for MAKERS SAKE. like when you really think about their relationship, it could’ve been an eye-opener for fenris and finally some legit sympathy for anders. but we all know that if they had of teamed up that Meredith would’ve been dead before the end of Act 1 so.

Isabela: whorephobia is not a joke. oversexualizing your only appearing brown woman is so poorly written. how about we appreciate her and her lovely bosoms but also let people tease her about her heart of gold? her innate understanding of freedom? instead of just a wave of dick? please?? can we give her some pants for when she fights? can we accept that i fall for rogues who hate themselves?? fuck. also whomever draws her x femHawke x Merrill literally is after my own heart.

Merrill: my fucking babygirl MARRY ME. Fenris could’ve been her older brother type, but NO. she and Isabela should’ve been canonical gfs instead of Isabela/Fenris (no shaming the pairing tho!!). I love how she’s written as neurodivergent. V nice. Sometimes I just look her up and cry because she’s fucking everything. Also: she’s in the Dalish origin and she’s far from being white. Why did they make the most innocent/naïve character really white? hmmmm.

Sebastian: whew that boy. Would totally be that annoying Mormon at your door but you still let him in bcc he’s super sweet. Also: huge ass bible thumper and should get his head slap because you said the maker loved all his children why do you defend a complicit old hag you annoying attractive fuck—

Varric: totally is a bard and the devs couldn’t handle the idea of him being one bcc it might make him look less straight. is the only grey morality person I don’t want to fucking bash in with a fry pan. he sees people and I like that, but you totally know he’s siding with mages every time bcc him and Anders are like besties. I’m sorry. I don’t make the rules. “Professional Younger Brother”.

Tallis: I know nothing about her but she seems okay. I think she was an escaped slave and honestly? Fucking props. Spy on a shitting organization, idk what you’re doing, but your VA was that cool lesbian from SPN so I think ur okay?

Inquisition

Blackwall: Redemption Arc 101. Love him to bits. Sad dad bunwall. good man. actually atoned for his sins by actively becoming a good person. his initial design is 80% hotter im so sorry but so not.

Cassandra: was way browner in the last game. would romance the fuck outta her. I love me a butch lady who melts at my dorky recitation of poetry. BioWare is a coward. also is the worst choice for divine. but not a bad person. could use some more guidance or get her ass whipped by a dalish elf about religion or a circle mage kid whos like “yeah bud i didn’t ask for the templars to whip my ass everyday for existing.”

The Iron Bull: I think the Qunari/Vashoth were a little based off black people (the whole anti blackness thing where ppl are scared of them bcc of whatever reason) and it pisses me off that he had a weird ass dubcon thing with Dorian in banter. It doesn’t make sense— he’s an A+++ dom and would not jump straight in role play without at least checking in at first like wtf BioWare.

Cole: his mother was chasind so he’s like not supposed to be that white? or like biracial? albino? idk. love him to bits tho. He’s neurodivergent and I deadass love him. romancing him? idk. I see why ppl think it’s fuckin nasty but also like as a writer I’d age him the fuck up so fast before my inquisitor even THOUGHT about that. like idk. I’m down with him being a sweet little bro character tho. he’s a babe. love him.

Sera: had the worst fucking writer I’ve ever seen and I willingly read the twilight saga twice by a shit ass racist white lady who okay’d pedophilia. like. Fuck you Kristjanson suck your own dick you fuck. had the worst options in regards to speak to her. has a thicc case of internalized racism that literally most of the fandom just loves to use against her. my lesbian neurodivergent queen. Would write a thousand fix it fics for her. Love her to bits. im gay.

Varric: I haven’t played DA2 so i don’t get why everyone wants to romance him but like. a dwarf romance? yes please. Idk he reminds me of my uncle so I only see him as fun uncle material. Deadass should adopt Cole and Merrill and co parent with Blackwall for Sera. dads? fuck yeah. love me some wholesome, present fathers.

Dorian: is a gay stereotype that I love/hate so much. and he’s also just as bad about being a creep bcc he sexualizes qunari men (in banter). I attribute that to shit writing tho. I want to protect him from all the “omg gay best friend!” people. he’d clearly be that tired gay that wouldn’t give a diddly damn about ur het romance. wanna talk about politics? he’s ur guy/gay.

Solas: “me, an intellectual:”. I don’t hate him, but I’m not about him. He comes off as mysterious and suave (which he totally is) but I deadass would not save him from himself because he’s a racist, exclusionist eggshell. idk. not my cup of tea, but I can totally see the appeal. And he’s interesting, I’ll totally say that. “I think the Dalish are garbage but they made you” is not a compliment. it’s so offensive. and such bait for “quirky girls” which I’m no fan of. Would be Achilles and let Patroclus (Lavellan in his case) die before he realized how his pride is literally a waste of time. If he gets a redemption arc I hope Lavellan gets to slap him before getting him to teach all about ancient Arlathan and show that the Evanuris weren’t all total dicknozzles. (Aka I really have a hard time believing that they’d be slavery cult things. especially since they’ve compared elves to indigenous ppl, Jews and the Romani.)

Vivienne: it’s so racist that they’d make a black woman be pro-slavery. That’s such internalized racism. She could’ve been the cool ass “educate yourself first before you speak, fool” ice lady, but NO. the devs could’ve kept the “Templars are a tool that I proudly can mandate” and the “circles are very good education” and we. Could. Have. Romanced. Her. Like. Fuck. Sake. I just wanna give her a hug and say “love yourself omg!!” and not even in a romantic way. Also: she and morrigan should not have been so antagonistic towards each other. I’d expect them to have great respect for each other, as they both moved up in the world through hardwork and very little help. They could learn different magic from each other too and still maintain that rival respect “oh you” mood. Sidenote: probably the cooler option for Divine. if her approval is high enough she’ll love and be loyal to you forever and i can’t see her agenda being bad. she improves the circles exponentially and tells all the antis to suck her pretty painted toes.

Josephine: an actual disney princess. romanced her my first playthrough. I love her so much. she just makes me so happy. And she’s like: “Integrity, Loyalty, peace. That is what it means to be a GREY WARDEN good fucking person.” she’s the person who would let you hold her hand if you got anxious and she’d be that person who shouldered the whole group project with finesse and poise and would probably lie for everyone as to not be mean. i love josie. her and leliana’s relationship is so cute, too. whether it’s romantic or not: women supporting women.

Leliana: if you leave her hardened you must hate her. why. she becomes so against herself. i like how shes feminine and lighthearted because that’s so powerful-- to remain hopeful when the world is hopeless. (its hard to know when to soften her/harden her so i get it but. google it. she deserves to be happy and sweet again.)

Cullen: uwu war criminal with shit ass “redemption arc” that was actually a half-assed (at BEST) recovery arc. Recovery isn’t linear, it isn’t pretty, and even the broken need to be told they are wrong in order to heal right. Like I’m offended by that bullshit. I’ve had to do some mental health recovery in the past and unlearning lots of toxic ideologies— which I’m still unlearning— and it bothers me that he gets an easy pass because he’s hot. It’s one thing if you like Cullen, it’s another thing if you hold him accountable.

[okaytimeswithscar]

sick and tired of trying

want a fic where i project on ex so hard he cries? no? too bad im posting it anyway

also available on ao3

trigger warnings: panic attacks, implied self harm, implied suicidal thoughts, past violence

Ex heaved for breath as he ran through the shopping district, weaving between the colorful shops and glancing behind him at the absolute horde of hostile mobs that were chasing him. Honestly, would it kill these hermits to light up their builds for once? Screeching to a halt outside of iTrade, he all but threw himself into the nether portal, holding his breath as he was transported between dimensions.

Stumbling out on the other side, he fumbled for the switch on his helmet that would let him breathe nether air as he tripped over his own feet and fell onto the dark glass floor. Finally managing to hit the switch, he had a minor coughing fit before figuring out how to breathe again.

Ex pulled himself up off the ground, leaning on the portal frame for support. As he did, pain shot through his ribs, and he winced. Oh, yeah, not supposed to exercise in a binder. Forgot about that. Well, it wasn't as if he really had a choice anyway - it was either "run like hell" or "get brutally murdered by monsters", and Ex didn't fancy losing his gear and ending up wherever he'd slept last again.

Sighing, Ex glanced around the empty nether hub, trying to decide where he wanted to go. Xisuma's base was a definite no - his relationship with his brother was still very strained, with X only having unbanned him fairly recently. Ex didn't particularly want to interact with any hermits at the moment, for that matter. He'd been feeling awfully self-conscious all day, like every person who so much as looked in his general direction was judging him.

Deciding the best course of action was to find a place nobody but him (and X, but he was likely busy with other things) enjoyed being in, Ex headed for the portal that would put him closest to the nearest stronghold. This time, he switched the settings on his helmet before going through, resulting in a much smoother exit as he came out in the overworld.

Ex's mind wandered as he slowly made his way towards the stronghold, going over everthing that had happened since X had been convinced to unban him around two months prior. Most of the hermits hadn't seemed bothered by his return (if they were, they sure weren't saying so) and some seemed... far less than bothered.

At first, Ex had been kind of annoyed by their attempts to befriend him. However, he'd ended up developing a soft spot for several of them; Stress, Zedaph, and Grian being a few of the lucky ones. Keralis and Bdubs had even managed to convince him to build a house in the aptly named "New Guy Village", and even if his building skills were subpar and he was barely around - preferring to explore and sleep wherever he found himself - they seemed content with him just trying.

Of course, you can't mention hermits trying to befriend Ex without talking about Joe, who was the reason he was even here in the first place, having smooth-talked X into unbanning him entirely on his own with several hours worth of vaugely threatening, philosophical poetry. Ex asked him why on several occasions, but Joe only answered with cryptic prose that Ex didn't get anything out of except that Joe though he "deserved a second chance, a chance to change, a chance to try again."

Entering the stronghold didn't startle Ex from his musings, though he did briefly remark to himself that the hermits seemed to have remembered that torches existed while fixing up the stronghold. He stepped through the portal and came out on a cobblestone platform, hitting the buttons that detached his helmet and pulling it off. He breathed deeply, enjoying the crisp coldness of the End, a stark contrast to the slightly stale air his helmet filtered for him. He began to walk across the precarious cobblestone path to the main island, slipping back into his thoughts as he sat down with his back against one of the obsidian pillars.

Ex pondered for what seemed like the millionth time about his name. Ex, short for Evil Xisuma, was... not his favorite way to be addressed. He disliked being written off as just an "evil" version of his brother. He'd had his own name, a while back, but thinking about that one felt even worse than being Ex. He'd tried to think of new names for himself, but none ever seemed to fit, and he doubted he could get anyone to stop calling him Ex anyway. He hated being labeled as evil no matter what, even if nobody truly meant it that way anymore.

He'd never really wanted to hurt anyone. He felt abandoned, bitter at being left out of everything, so he lashed out at anyone who he could. Everything hurt, and he bottled it up, but it all had to explode eventually. Ex knew he had been out of control, destroying everything indiscriminately as he raged on. He knew X had to stop him somehow. It didn't stop it from hurting when his own brother, his younger twin who he'd looked out for and loved all his life, faced him down and banished him to the void right at the beginning of this new season.

Everyone knew this reasoning. Everyone knew it hurt X to do that too, to be suddenly alone and without his older twin for the first time in a very long time. And now, everyone knew Ex was trying. Trying not to lose control again. Trying to make up for the things he'd done. Trying to let others in. Trying to change, trying to fix it trying trying trying. Ex was so sick and tired of trying. It was all he could do, but it wasn't enough. It wasn't enough to atone, it wasn't enough to participate, it wasn't enough.

It wasn't enough, and his stupid ribs hurt, and his eyes stung but he wasn't going to cry, he wasn't, but that wasn't enough either and Ex curled up into a ball next to the obsidian pillar and he couldn't breathe, his chest was tight and it hurt, but he wasn't going to look at himself right now, he couldn't handle it, the emptiness of the void was right there, calling him, he couldn't do this, he couldn't do this, he dug his nails into his arms, the wounds there still far too fresh, it hurt but he didn't care anymore, it was too much, not enough, too much-

-and suddenly Ex was sobbing into someone's shoulder, and someone was holding him tightly, and someone was whispering to him but he couldn't understand them, and he tried to scratch at his arms but someone held him so he couldn't, and he couldn't stop crying but they just held on, and they whispered again and Ex could hear them, just barely, but who was it, who was here-

"Ex, ex, hey, hey. Hold on. You're okay. It's okay, you're okay." -Joe, that was Joe. Joe was here and Ex let some tension go and wrapped his arms around him and cried, but Joe just whispered that he was okay, that it was gonna be okay. Ex relaxed into him, Joe leaning up against the pillar as they hugged, reassuring Ex as he slowly calmed. Ex pulled his head off Joe's shoulder, his eyes red and with tear stains running down his face. He pulled back from the hug, moving over slightly to sit next to Joe, still holding on to his arm. Joe simply let him, taking deep breaths as Ex unconsciously followed his example.

"...Joe?" Ex said quietly, his voice hoarse from sobbing.

"Yes, Ex?" Joe replied just as quietly, sounding concerned.

"...thank you. For everything, I mean. Letting me come back, and being my friend, and this..." Ex turned away from Joe, but still didn't let go of his arm.

"It isn't a problem. I believe that everyone deserves another chance, including you, and by gosh I'm gonna get you one. That's the JoeHills Difference!" Ex giggled quietly, smiling slightly as he finally let go of Joe and stood up, Joe doing the same.

"Hey, what were you doing in the End anyway?"

"Oh, just collecting some obsidian in return for gracious compensation at the hands of one X-I-Zumavoid."

"He's... paying you to mine obsidian?"

"Precisely! He seemingly needs a sizable amount, and has decided the wisest way to procure a large quantity would be to enlist as many individuals with a diamond deficiency as possible to obtain it for him."

"...I didn't really understand that, but okay."

"Would you be willing to assist me in this obsidian-aquiring venture?"

"I... sure."

Ex, still slightly confused, and still trying to wipe his eyes discreetly, followed as Joe, rambling on about something or other, strode towards a half-mined obsidian pillar. Ex grinned as he played along, pretending to understand the other man, and deciding that maybe, just maybe, this was enough for now.

#hermitcraft #hermitblr #evil xisuma #joehills #xisuma #/panic m #/self harm m #/sh m #/suicide m #/violence m #creeper.txt