#im trying Desperately to understand What i did but i didnt do anything we were just laying down and when i got up he started meowing and

[stateswscarlet]

hi this is the 3p person. how do i stop feeling like im doing this to change the 3D? can i acknowledge that it will change the 3D? im just confused. this manifested really fast but ive fulfilled myself with the state of being with him a bunch so why didnt that reflect like this? idk. im just scared im gonna imagine and enjoy it and nothing will reflect. i was thinking of getting coaching with you because idk what to do anymore. i hate my 3D. i just miss sp.

you need to give up on the 3D fully. you need to accept and acknowledge you (all of us) CANNOT change the 3D, we do not have the free will to do that as our free will ends in imagination. you must really sit with this and decide if you'd rather be trying to chase a shadow world and be frustrated, or would you rather 100% enjoy your imagination and feel good and be stressfree? hopefully the latter. we don't do anything to change the 3D as imagination and who were are is CONSTANTLY reflected, even before you knew about this stuff. we cant make it or un-make it reflect as creation is finished hence why we shift states. knowing the 3D changes is very different than chasing it and doing things for the 3D. the 3D will never fulfill you, only YOU choose how things fulfill you or if they even do at all. you need to understand you only want the feeling, not the actual; physical desire.

its like your shadow, do you only walk and move just so your shadow moves? or do you move because you want to? your 3d is the same, you're not constantly thinking of your shadow when you're doing things because the LAW is that its always there anyways. the law shouldn't be a comfort factor for you because it just is.

as i said in the previous ask about your situation. I'm pretty sure you haven't been fulfilling yourself as much as you think you were, and you were fulfilling yourself for stuff that wasn't even your end goal.

youre relying too much on the 3D and seeing this as smth you have to do to get them back and that is exactly where you're going wrong, you need to give up on changing the 3D completely, as edward art says you need to imagine as if there was no outer world bc the outer world has never fulfilled you and never will.

i get missing sp and those feelings are valid, but you need to realize that your life isn't going to end if you're not with them. manifesting an sp shouldn't be something you need, its something you CAN have and definitely shouldn't be approached from a desperate/needy mindset because that will lead to codependent (not saying you are like this but I'm putting it out there in case there are others). please stop revolving your life around an sp and put your crown back on. YOU made sp special, YOU are the secret sauce, they're just some random who YOU decided means something. you need to realize that (manifestation stuff aside) you will 10000% will ok if you don't be with them because you're more than content on your own and can date anyone else. i say this with love but as someone who was in your shoes and knows how it feels, you will only be running in circles if you don't approach this from a healthier mindset. work on your self concept (don't tie it to manifesting ur sp at all) and LIVE your life, do things that you enjoy, have fun/date around with other people (if you have the chance to bc remember that you're not pretending, you are single in the 3D), and stop trying to get back someone. give yourself the feelings of your dream relationship first and how it makes YOU feel, then add sp into the equation. you don't want them back, you want a fulfilling relationship. how would you feel if they came back tomorrow yet the same issues happened as they did back when you were together before/theyre just not good/the relationship sucks? that isn't what you want, you want the fulfilling relationship so focus on aspects about that and give those to yourself. you don't want their physical body back bc it means nothing to you unless you get the feelings you desire.

[sharkdays]

as always heres my thoughts on the new ep (HZ025) spoilers!!! be careful

also im sick so if i make less sense then usual thats whu

this episode broke my fucking heart bro i got so much amethio content but at what cost.

terapagos still pissed as hell at amethio, i don;t think he's related to lucius (like not blood relatives) but i think it's possible he resembles/is the descendant of someone lucius/terapagos knew in terapagos' eyes.

also not to let out my film student but when diana and hamber had that confrontation hamber's face was half light half shadow and diana's was illuminated by the moon almost entirely and i started hollering. its fuckinnnn symbolism babey!!! love that shit its so good mwah

really interested to learn about their whole deal. AND diana just hopping on arcanine and just leaping out the window no hesitation??? shes so cool i love her. we need more badass older women in media methinks (i wonder how strong her arcanine is?)

also tbh i forgot all about onyx's garganacl so when the pokemon living in the castle were crystallized i freaked out for a second thinking it had to do something with terapagos/tera crystals and terrastalizing. i wonder if we'll see something like that later on, like the ones in area zero?

also um liko win onscreen this is soooo epic!!! shes so cool guys look at her go. roy as well!

speaking of onyx, i wonder if he was brought on the mission partly to serve as damage control for sango? she's a sore loser and aggressive in both attitude and battle style (literally used self destruct girl HUH) and he was consistently acting as a guard. we didnt get to see too much of them which i guess is expected but i really wonder how they compare to the other explorers.

ough. amethio. i've seen a few people mention his more ruthless battling here (he did try to blow away friede's phone (i think?) and was more aggressive with his attacks) but here it read to me as more like. desperation. he seems like he's scrambling for any sort of purchase he can find to complete his goal, especially with his expressions after he lost. it really makes me wonder why someone so young is knee deep into this, and what he's trying to prove if anything

also it could just be a coincidence but amethio's and friede's battle on the rooftop reallu reminded me of their first ever battle on the roof of liko's school. ANDDDD the contrast of the first episode being liko in the darkness of the night, unsure of what lie ahead vs this episode, where she is carried off to safety in the care of her friends into the early hours of dawn and amethio being left in the wake HELLO does any one hear me

anyways i need to wait for subs to really understand. i think i am going to take a nap now

#shark speaks #pokemon horizons #amethio #liko #sango pokemon #onyx pokemon #pokeani #anipoke #HZ025 #hamber pokemon #diana pokemon #shark watches horizons #yeah thats a tag #friede #friede pokemon

[sarcasticorgasms]

call me crazy but i REALLY enjoyed the ending of good omens s2! (spoilers below the cut)

OKAY crowley points this out when he tells gabriel to jump out the window, but aziraphale didnt actually witness heaven's direct cruelty to him, didnt experience first hand how willing they were to throw him away and kill him the second he disagreed with them. crowley, however, did. we dont know if they ever told each other exactly what happened, or if crowley ever told zira that gabriel had said "just shut your stupid mouth and die already." it clearly lasted with crowley, he remembers the exact words.

the choice neil made for aziraphale to not yet fully understand that "good guys" and "bad guys" arent accurate depictions of heaven and hell makes sense when you realize that he's never received the reality of being punished by them. crowley isn't naive though, he's been through this more than once, has witnessed the cult like mentality of heaven and hell and tried to help aziraphale escape. he's always tried to help zira come to his own conclusions, and usually, he at least comes to an understanding (poor people DO have less opportunities, and you're helping science!). you can feel his desperation when hes asking his angel to leave with him, both in season 1 and season 2. but that resignation in his eyes when he realizes that zira is still stuck in the cult of heaven, still cant really see in shades of grey- he knows that nothing he says or does will change zira's mind; the only thing that will change his mind is seeing first hand the cruelty and lack of compassion from heaven towards aziraphale himself.

there were so many amazing moments where they showed the lack of knowledge from heaven. the rule that they're not to visit earth, not to know too much (or anything, it seems) about humans. because someone in heaven knows that access to knowledge makes you smarter, makes you curious, makes you ask questions. whether or not thats the decision of god, or of metatron remains to be seen. but one person being in charge, who's clearly clueless but pretends to know what god wants, is classic cult leader shit. people who follow along without question, who assume that their will is good- that's what the angels are. its hard to truly hate them when you realize that they're all under the same thumb. that scene when uriel asks the metatron if they've done something wrong was kind of heart breaking, they're just children playing a game they were never told all the rules to.

what makes crowley so fascinating as a character is that he's curious, he asks questions. he's not good, he's not bad, he's just... himself. honestly, he's more human than demon in his choices. what he said about following hell as far as he can, so he can stay on his own side is just perfect- and yeah, lonely. and i cant even imagine how lonely he feels now. im obsessed with how we're shown his attempts at changing aziraphale's mind - something about him being the one to encourage aziraphale to try human food, something about him inviting aziraphale to Edinburgh to show him how poverty forces you to make morally questionable choices, that not everything is black and white - idk. it's subtle, it's allowing him to come to the same conclusion on his own, it makes me want to shovel aquarium gravel into my mouth

aziraphale, when he's away from heaven's influence, is much more morally grey, he's more himself, he's happier. but as soon as his superiors are around, he loses all sense of self. he automatically assumed he was going to fall for lying to the other angels and not killing innocent children. he knows better than to ask questions, he KNOWS that what he's asked to do is sometimes wrong, but he has this cognitive dissonance he cant get past- heaven asks him to do things that are bad, but heaven isnt bad. heaven is always good, so what theyre asking must not be bad. but, killing children is pretty objectively bad. he cant kill children. but its god's will, so he has to, it must be good. but its not. and round and round it goes. he's never actually been punished by heaven firsthand, and i think once he sees close up that heaven's will isn't necessarily god's will, and that god's will is not always benevolent, he'll realize. he'll realize that you cant always change things from the inside, that there's a systematic issue that can only be solved by dismantling the institution. god i hope season 3 is dismantling heaven.

all in all i love this ending i am SUCH a sucker for escaping cult stories (nimona and she-ra, nd stevenson i love u). like your whole life you are so sure that you're doing the right thing, and then someone comes along and turns everything upside down and asks you questions, forces you to ask questions, and you can't help but defend where you came from, surely there has to be some mistake, if you could just talk to someone higher up you're sure you could clear this whole misunderstanding up, and then that higher up tell you point blank that they know what theyre doing, they know that innocent people are getting hurt. you witness their violence firsthand, and its intentional, its directed towards YOU. because you dared to ask if what we're doing is really the right thing. and that's when you finally understand.

#gomens #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 #good omens season 2 spoilers #good omens #meta analysis #good omens s2 spoilers

[insulationsun]

I gotta know: Why Spamton? What's the draw? He's just a weird little man to me, but I feel like there's something deeper here that I missed.

SPINS AROUND IN A CIRCLE. weird little guy. i will gladly take the time to sit here and ramble about spammy WOOHOO YAY HWOOO

under the cut (text wall . sorry)

im sure it seems weirdly out of left field for me to become like obsessed with him/find comfort in him but actually does make a lot of sense esp when you consider he comes in like. three stages of like the most compelling narrative ever? and ultimately he is like a tragedy of a character-- but utdr is never ever totally devoid of hope, so theres a glimpse into recovery for him as well. and i do love stories of recovery in everything i get into, post-canon stuff, how characters deal with trauma/grief etc.

something i like digging into a lot and he's very much That. i should probably go in chronological order here; but spamton is like, a very desperate character? he's someone that desires to be noticed, but also simply wants to be recognized for the work he puts into doing his job. especially because it seems like addisons were created to represent advertisements; they have a purpose sort of predetermined into them. at least thats how it reads in canon (ie: "we're addisons! all we do is advertise!")

for spamton to try desperately to make a stable income, to make any kind of sale or impact at all, and fail at every turn is really tragic to think about but it also makes his story like. very relatable. and then there's even MORE since he is literally like. held by the hand (by whoever is on the phone. mike/gaster/etc. whatever) being Told how to do the thing he was basically born to do and couldn't. Now he is dependent on someone else's guiding hand to even have a chance of success, attention and validation for anything he does. I do think addispam worked very hard, probably even harder than any other addison where it just seemed so /natural/ to them, and thought to himself: "is there something wrong with me? is it me?"

and to each addison he knew, who had no idea how to react to the fact that no matter what he did, or how hard he tried, nothing ever worked. so they could only respond with pity, maybe a pat on the back.

and the thing about spamton is that he is very proud. i think like, indicated by his fight, his insistence he didnt need friends, he didnt need other people is probably the same reason he never felt like he could reach out and get a helping hand? he had something to prove. to prove he could DO this, without help. cyber city and the idea of being created for a single purpose failed him, but i also dont think he ever asked for help either. (and i dont want to suggest that what happened to him was his fault at all. but i do think that maybe if he didnt feel like he was being pitied, that things couldve been at least a little different.) and his proudness turning him into someone who is a bit egotistical, when finding success and far surpassing the other addisons.

and of course, again, the tragedy in his success is that it was entirely dependent on one person's presence. and when they leave, spamton has no idea what he's doing. he can only make every wrong decision, because it was never explained to him in the first place. at least, that's what i can speculate. if it all came crumbling down when he was abandoned, i can only assume that he was just repeating what was said to him without ever really understanding what he was saying. everything he did for big shot autos was just regurgitation from whoever was on the phone. and even in that respect you can tell he was just being used; or at least disrespected if they didnt have the courtesy to even explain it to him

and his eviction, being thrown aside when it was clear he didnt really know what he was doing. when he wasnt useful anymore, well. now he's just a burden.

we don't know any details about how he became a puppet really, so there is only speculation there. i won't go into that, but i think the sort of maybe gradual glitch in his speech is also something that's like. important to me i guess? it sucks that he isn't able to articulate what he wants exactly. it's hard to express his feelings, because people will be weirded out. that's why i like the idea of characters just getting used to this and working around it.

fics that sort of explore the addisons and how adjusting to this seemingly new version of spamton is fun; this sort of awkward new dynamic they have. and not getting into spam + kris stuff but their parallels in the game are just like endless, they really are similar to each other when you spend the time to just dig and dig into their characters

and i like that he is kind of just mentally ill? like im not sure how to explain that one but i like that for even through everything he's been through, he can still have like. companionship, even a future, possibly? he's been through hell, yet he's still able to Have something. i do enjoy that. its why i love pacifist so much; spamton really denies this part of himself that i think he's denied maybe most of his life; he Needs other people. he WANTS other people, friends. it makes my heart warm when he realizes that FRIENDSHIP is the greatest deal he could ever make. i think that is nice i guess. and i think through everything he's been through, just having a genuine friend there would've helped a lot, and thats what i like abt that realization.

it's also why kris being his sort of like first friend is sweet. i've mentioned before that it is very difficult for me to see a scenario in which kris just didnt care about spamton at all and it's the player that gets endeared to spamton which YES, is correct, but also like i think kris as a character also gets a bit endeared as well. i think it is very clear from the conversation after the spamton neo fight that they DO see the similarities in their situations.

i'm getting off track but spamton's story is like...very detailed? there's so many things you can infer from canon a lot of surrounding characters talk about him. i know people think he's overhyped but like i recently replayed ch2 so like i wasnt rlly exposed to like, the hype of Spamton when ch2 was Just released i kinda just played it bc i didnt want to get spoiled but i didnt get fixated. but now im like wow, there's a lot of care put into this actually?

i like tragedy but more than that i like the chance to recover afterwards; a chance at a better future and life. so obv that's why i wrote my fic so he can just hang out in the lightworld and sort of dig into a sort of awkward friendship between him and kris. there's a huge release of tension after you defeat spamton NEO in his story which gives him that moment of clarity

which is neat. he's changed drastically, but he doesnt need to go back to the way he was, or 'back to normal' which is nice too. he cant really go back to how things were but that's okay, he can find a new life and friends and better support to carry on in the future. and to him i think it would feel a bit weird too, he's so used to his puppet self now, ykno?

i do also enjoy his glitched, ad-riddled speech becoming a source of comfort to someone. the addisons, swatch, kris, etc. whoever. im biased obviously but to associate his more unique quirks with something good, instead of being something off-putting and strange.

this is also why im so attached to the idea of spamton being a caretaker of any kind, as clumsy as he might be at it, but thats just a personal thing for me.

anyways theres a lot to his story, just need to dig but also have the brain to sort of extrapolate at what's already there, because theres a lot of inferring and even guesswork to piece something together, but i do think theres enough there to paint like an almost full picture of spamton as a character. very similar to sans in this respect. the duality of funny meme guy vs tragic character with a lot of nuance. very cool that he can be both

though that is simplifying it because he's simply just a well written/realized character

#asks #very long sorry. opened tha floodgates #might be typos? i wrote this in one sitting #sentences that might not make sense. yea

[selamat-linting]

if yall think that department store job is bad wait until you hear about the stock broker job i almost had.

so, i recently turned 19 at the time and was desperate for employment. there's this walk-in interview ad on the local job site. i went there, hand in my resume, and without looking at my file the HR told me im accepted for a three day training program. it should be a red flag, but i came in anyway.

our trainer is a man in a fancy suit. the first thing he said other than the over-excited greeting was thanks. thanks for not believing the naysayers who said this job is a scam.

i might be stupid, but im not stupid enough to ignore that. immediately i was hyper aware of everything this trainer was doing and saying. our first day was all motivational speeches and bombarding everyone who dared to question their scheme with noises and covert shaming so they'd get in line. the actual product we're selling, the daily operation, he either sidesteps the question or explain it in such a vague nothingburger way that you couldnt understand it. at least they gave us free lunch though.

when i get home, i began looking up the name of the company. theyre formally certified as a broker company, but its hard to find an actual job desc or the benefits. there's even accounts of costumers who felt theyre getting scammed out of the whole deal. i still came in the next day.

i dont know what i was thinking tbh. i guess there is a part of me who wished it was all a misunderstanding, or a part of me who thinks i can actually make a sale and get money despite the circumstances, and a part of me who wants to convince myself that im not a quitter. i was a mess. i went on my second day, and at least a quarter of people are gone. we did our training, this time we're taught how to trade stocks, using software we barely understand with principles we dont even get. and ofc when we get the job, the money we use for trading would be our customers' money.

during break time, they told us to get comfortable with the workers who have been there for months. i was friendly with them, but i realized they're the ones i could actually get a straight answer from. i basically cornered and made one of them to admit this is a job with no base pay, just a commission scheme. and some havent closed anything for months since the day they start working. i admit, i did it for myself, but i hope other people who enrolled in training with me heard it too.

it was then i made the decision to drop out. dont get me wrong, commission only jobs are a standard practice for a lot of sales industry, and i respect people who do the hustle. actually, i might even try it one day if (big IF here) im skilled and financially stable enough to weather the rough months. but its wrong for that company to avoid explaining that aspect especially when the job is convincing people to fund your trading business and you cant even educate your workers on the product properly! its predatory and scammy as fuck.

and for years after that sometimes i hear a story of a coworker who tried their luck. all of them failed. well, one girl i know manage to close a deal. except she got screwed by her seniors and she didnt get her earnings. one guy i know even end up drowning in debt because of that job. but then again, i dont feel sorry for him because i overheard him confessed to raping a girl at a party once so he deserved it lol!

anyway, the office of that trading company was soon shut down around 2020. i heard they got sued, or they cant pay the rent for the building, im not sure. they were closed though. and everyone who knows that place but doesnt work there, recognized they have a not so stellar reputation. however, they recently reopened under a new name. different company name, same business model. thats capitalism.

#posts about my life

[the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see]

drop the lore for your song !

(insert "sorry i put this in drafts and immediately forgot about it" cake here. sorry i put this in drafts and immediately forgot about it!!!)

okay so first i guess we should probably drop the lyrics, theyre on bandlab but also who give a shit. here you go:

-and you sit there like youre some starry-eyed god

asking for sacrifice, knowing what i lost

and what can i do but follow you?

i made you my temple, just follow through

and your honor, you sit and stare as i stand witness

to this man burning everything i love down with this building

and from the ashes his eyelash comes falling, i make a wish

it wont ever come true but ill make him pray it did

and god, my god i would follow you to death

you know this so you hold a blunt knife to my neck

i am more than just your satisfactions and regrets

but you are less than i thought, you are less and you're not even worth it

i am breathing just a little and calling it a life

you are walking in the wild with a mass market knife

and it feels so juvenile to talk it all through

we are teenagers at battle, we are always coming true

HOW DOES IT FEEL TO KNOW YOU COULD NOT HAVE SAVED ME?

AND DO YOU BELIEVE IN EVERYTHING YOU SEE ON THE NEWS

CAUSE YOU SHOULD KNOW BY NOW THAT ALL KIDS DO IS LOSE EVENTUALLY.

I HATE THAT YOU COULDNT SAVE ME.

that must mean im stronger.

you said you would protect me.

but im like ocean water.

and youre like twenty three!

so i choose now between honesty and dignity

and i cannot worship a god i cant believe

yeah i tore my palms down your altar

for war, blood must taste sweet

i dont know what to do to make you believe that im insane

you made me, made me you, made me who i am

no you didnt make me, i made me, you were just a tool

ill say anything so ill sleep the whole night through

first piece of lore: i did in fact write this in tumblr drafts. people tend to not believe me when i tell them but notes app is far too open. tumblr drafts is for the arteries. also the sense of danger from my drafts being cleared or my account being deleted (which happened) keeps me on my toes.

second piece of lore: this is less of a song and more of a conglomeration of words i thought go together good. i didnt really have a plan for this as i was writing it, it sort of formed the image and story it has as i wrote and only when i was "done" (the song isnt complete but im done writing it for now) did i have it completely. my sister said the phrase "starry-eyed god" and i ran from there! i was kind of toying with the idea of being hurt by someone who doesnt really believe they are harming you, and sort of falling across that line all the time of are they really innocent or are they playing innocent.

i also liked the idea of being so in love with someone that you'd worship them, not understanding that that isnt love, its obsession. lots of misunderstandings and insanity in this bad boy.

this is also definitely the ending half of the song. in my recording the end is a little fucked because, third piece of lore, i accidentally slammed my hand on the table out of passion and spent the rest of the song trying not to cry in pain. why did i push through, you may ask. why didnt i just stop and rerecord in a minute. well im something of an artiste (idiot)

that bit on "what can i do but follow you/i made you my temple just follow through" where im high and singing almost reverently is what i want more of the beginning to sound like. for this section we have more of those divine chorus vibes peeking through every once in a while, so the beginning will have this almost spoken desperate vibe peeking through, but majority of that high angel voice for most of it.

okay this is already long so im gonna stop here with general lore -- if you want me to go through the lyrics as well and talk about that, i am more than happy to!! lyrics are my favorite parts of a song, especially writing-wise, so i would love that actually. some of the lyrics in this are inspired by poetry so its pretty fun to look back and see.

thank you for asking!! i love you sm <33

#asks #the tree sings #the tree speaks #ily anon

[joysmileyay]

today was really rough. as it always is when its time for school. i walked past someone today. they didnt see me or anything. they were in my anthropology class and we sat next toe ach other sometimes and we texted a little bit and said we should hang out and i tried to make that happen but then we just never did and then class was over and they never texted me again so i never bothered with it. so it really stung walking past them because its just another reminder that ive been in college 2 and a half years now and havent made a single friend. and at some point it was not for lack of effort. like ive tried. its like. i cant be mad or upset with myself because its not my fault is it? and i cant even be upset with that person either because well i recognize that theyre a very busy person and sometimes you just dont have room for another friend in your life. i mean shit just the other day one of a few people i know irl asked to hang out with me. we met up the other week. i decided i wouldnt have the energy to do this again, that i just wasnt really enthusiastic about them and like... i dont smoke weed and she and her friends do sooooo what would i even do. anyway i basically said yeah we arent gonna hang out again bye. and its like who am i to do that when im apparently soooo desperate for friends? i dont know. but the point is like i said if someone doesnt have the time or energy for me i get it. so i cant be mad at them, i cant be mad at myself. who the fuck am i supposed to be mad at about how lonely i am? also i cant stop thinking about how much i hate that im male because in my major seriously like 99% of the people are girls. and outside of that i generally am not interested in being friends with guys. like there are very few guys who i would approach purposefully and pretty much theyd have to be like me. and im not really a guy am i? like they have to be gay or bisexual or nonbinary or something and honestly just being gay usually isnt enough. anyway point is i hate that, outwardly at least, im a guy because i feel like the people i try to at the very least make small talk with or be friends with think im hitting on them. and its not like i fucking blame them. we all know how guys are. but beyond that it just feels like theres this barrier between me and the people who id look for companionship in just because i was born with a dick and it fucking huuuuurts dude. i feel like id have such an easier time connecting with these people if i was a woman. its so alienating and it fucking sucks. i mean deep down i basically am a woman or at least not a guy and they just cant see that. and i dont think transitioning would make that any better especially down here lol that person i was talking about is nonbinary so it hurts even more that we just didnt actually become friends because i felt so close to meeting someone who understands and then it just didnt work out. kinda feel like a caged animal that had a carrot dangled in front of it lolz! thanks for letting me whine

[beesmygod]

ugh

despite being such a gossip and drama hound myself, i do not relish being the subject of it. you might think its because being the subject of scrutiny and attention is stressful. it’s actually because the people who keep lining up to try to shots at me wind up being the dumbest people alive who knock themselves out somehow. i think its important to get in front of “a narrative”, especially in this case, where every player is a lying liar who lies ahahaha. this one is way funnier than morbi actually. up until now, i was tactfully setting aside what happened out of uh. whatever kindness was left in my heart, i guess. more fool me!

im not going out of my way to crop ppl out of this if you look bad its your own damn fault. no one made you type this shit but you. dont post shit you can’t cash.

you might have been confused by the exchange between anon and this guy yesterday when i reblogged it to set the record straight on morbi. i was, until very recently, an infrequent contributor to his webcomics discord. earlier this year, i tried to reach out into more communities so i could get to know more artists and keep up with what’s hot (what a stupid fucking idea that was, in hindsight). a few days ago, some weirdly supportive of kiwifarms tweets from a comic artist who was ruined by them were posted for discussion. everyone pretty much just noted that it was weird with one person asking what kf even was. everyone else explained so i added this stupid shit

note: this is at 5:24 am. because at 7pm that night, one of the people in the discord goes completely full fucking tilt out of literally nowhere. i have screencapped the entire conversation up until that point as proof that i 1. literally did not say anything else the entire day and 2. proof that the conversation was completely normal up until that point.

inexplicably, people in the server put on kids gloves and start trying to come to a middle ground with this dipshit like hmm yes maybe we are a little kiwifarms could you explain more so we can understand you. when i noticed an hour later i saw red.

for someone who was “not helping”, the attention-seeking hysteric suddenly evaporated into thin air. i dont think anyone has actually shamed them for their behavior before. the conversation was shut down rather than resolved because i raised the temperature. daniel invited me to speak to him more privately in his dm if i had any more concerns bc i was pissed it was being swept under the rug. so i did.

here is the conversation in full. im posting it bc it makes him look like a clown and because later, he characterizes this as “chasing him” into his dms. what i didnt realize until today is that he says that the person going nuts is a moderator’s sibling, which explains why they’re permitted to take huge shits on people with no repercussions.

having committed the worst crime you can do in a nerd group (be mean) i was subjected to a post-mortem about the event (?) which culminated with this unbelievable irony cap

after my 10 mins were up, i said “i am not a good cultural fit or share the same moral priorities as this server and i will show myself out” and left. i vented on my twitter with blistering posts basically saying “well they’re all young. its annoying and seems bad but what can i do but leave”. and left it there.

it seems insanely obvious to me, so obvious that i struggled to even have to explain it to people whose entire brain appeared to have leaked out of their skull, that allowing someone in your discord for artists accuse random artists of wanting to reboot the mass shooting and violent transphobia website is literally the worst possible behavior you could permit. i wasnt expecting the mods to leap into action and do something, as they seemed to desperately think. i wanted to not belong to a community that would tolerate or entertain this.

anyway, yesterday morbi happened. i reblogged that post and daniel, after being told he wasnt a problem, decided he absolutely had to be one right now. he followed me on twitter and began posting ominously about a “write-up” of what happened between morbi and i because “some people” (this could literally only be the discord chat, and the reason he didnt want to post it there so they could snicker at it to themselves was because he thought this would humiliate or scare me) were curious.

maybe you’ve noticed a little flaw in the logic both morbi and dan have when it comes to “doxing”: for two people who are very concerned about privacy they’re out here retweeting the very information they’re decrying as invasive and then dan goes and fucking googles her and posts on a public platform more information about her than i cared to know. i cant stop thinking about how these morons were completely convinced they were doing something noble and righteous here by standing up for someone that maybe might be a black woman (hence: racism) based entirely on like a pintrest account

the cloying, transparent attempts to seduce me into messaging him first to soothe his battered ego are so desperate and pathetic that they make you hurt from the sidelines. you can see me gently try to explain why they look like a complete lunatic clutching their pearls over unmasking anonymous hate before i give up. there was so much obviously wrong about what they were doing that i was in disbelief that they were telling me that they were doing it.

1. taking a “both sides” approach doesn’t work when one person is a serial sexual harasser and the other posted an email address attached to a near cry-typing comment.

2. the attempt to use black women as a cudgel to defeat his posting enemy.

3. whatever this. attempt at banter is. idk man.

all of this didn’t work, so he tried showing me a piece of what he was writing that was the most deliberately inflammatory in the hopes that this morsel would finally compel me to bite and come begging for a re-write to save my webcomic career.

i wasn’t posting in a way that was drawing attention to this, it was a nosy (positive) friend who noticed this happening and went “holy shit what the fuck are you doing” which caused him to backpedal furiously

i was planning on letting him post it and just letting it speak for itself. i cannot think of a more ruinous thing to do to yourself than to ally with a sexual harasser and post openly and transparently about how extremely mad you are about how a girl made you feel. what could have possibly gone wrong.

in the end, daniel signed off with this post, signaling a more positive future for himself and his comic since his plan to annoy someone with a reputation for being a huge bitch multiple times by trying to downplay the severity of his and his friend’s actions, somehow blew up in his face

ah wait hold on. im getting word that he posted this after deleting a different post. this one

if there were any doubt what this were all about, daniel went and tweeted it out (literally) because subtext is difficult. my demand for a public apology for being accused baselessly of a career ending lie in order to stop this behavior from ever happening again has been recontextualized in his head as mean old bea picking on him and forcing him to do terrible things like “moderate” as a moderator.

over the past week ive been subject to racists, sex pests and 0/10 trolls but the spineless, moral coward is the most egregiously memorable of the lot. despite the amount of leeway i gave him for his repeated weak-willed behavior, he always found a new way to own himself without external prompting. despite me walking away and being satisfied with that, he came back for more. there are some people you cannot help, there are some people i don’t want to help because they cannot stop putting their hands on hot stoves. and then there are people who are begging for it.

somehow, it will be my fault that he feels bad and embarrassed about his behavior because i have catalogued it after being pushed around enough and it will not be seen as a direct result of his repeated failure of conscience.

anyway lol, lmao

#long post

[the-kipsabian]

lemme tell you about men of the year

so ethan wrote me two autos instead of the just one i actually paid for. cause he was like "okay who do i make this out for" and i told him my name is night and he looked at me for a hot second (cause he knew at that point where im from so its kinda obvious night is not a very finnish name lol) like "is that your real name" and i just went "well, kinda, yeah" and then he jUST REACHED FOR ANOTHER PICTURE LIKE "okay give me your REAL name" and im just desperately trying to tell him he doesnt need to do this but he insisted and now i have. two. one made to night and one made with my real name ;;

ETHAN REMEMBERED US FROM BABES PREVIOUS CON SHENANIGANS, which is incredible, considering i was only a part of that very briefly on a video chat with him for like half a minute but hE REMEMBERED. hes so goddamn sweet

scorp immediately noticed our matching shoes when it was our turn in the line. and that they matched together with one of the pictures they had up for signing, so if/when you see wrestlebash vlog come up uuuh yeah boys did an upwards panning shot with our look cause yeah we also committed to this bit lol (we had matching shoes, ethan shirts and sunglasses on, for daryl as well lol)

ethan was also incredibly honored to know i mainly flew out here for this to meet him (as he was the original headliner for me before kip and penny were announced tbh), and then i had to tell him all about my eight and a half hour flight and how im here for five days and also meeting my babe for the first time and yeah. he was so honored to know i was doing this for the first time mainly for him ;;

and then i told him i was also here for kip as i happened to show him my arm kinda off hand and his face. HIM FACE. if youve ever seen ethan have one of those shocked, speechless big eyed looks.. yeah he was literally looking at my arm like that before he was like "THATS SO COOL". he also most definitely wink wink nudge nudged me about the all-atlantic title with pac and what hes been saying this past week potentially about kip in promos and i might have slightly freaked out at him caUSE YES MAN I KNOW. (he also told me to tell kip hi when i saw him later as i mentioned im still prepping myself for all that lol)

there is also a good few shots of the art haul we brought with us for the two of them on scorps insta. his "WHAAAAAT" lives rent free in my head tbh. they were so cool with us taking so much of their time ;;

also ethan is so easy to talk to which is so surprising to me. i mean yeah i know hes a really chill dude and all, but also as i told him "but YOURE ETHAN PAGE" ("that does mean anything, my children dont care about that either!" which. understandable lol)

i didnt get to talk with scorp a lot, i was taking a lot of ethans time asdfghjkl and also @ss-trashboat was just dicking about with him (about buying photos i have been told lol) but he was so nice and cool too. an absolute delight of a man

also after we left their table we were like halfway gone the aisle before i realized i totally forgot in all of this to actually get the duo auto from them so we just walked back in line for things. to which scorp told us we could have just skipped the line to come back but lmao we already took so long before we didnt wanna cut in asdfghjkl

also ethan was the only one in our photos to hold daryl so thats special <3

#salty nights in jersey #i dont think i really missed anything lol #we'll see how much makes into the vlog when it comes out cause i know ethan was recording at least the art part too #but yeah just. them <33 #so nice so wholesome everything i was hoping for honestly i love these two so much 💜 #please if you have a chance to meet either of them please do. they are both so amazing💜💜

[menalez]

"Is anon trying to revile woman nowadays based on-" hi im that anon, not really Im just anti military 😭

i have no motive to try and push a "women are just as bad as men" im just an anon! I might be seeing it as more accusatory than that person intended but. i wasnt even expecting any one other than mena to respond or read that! I didnt dig anything up it was just something I heard of and thought it was a very clear example bc it really messed me up to see + read!

Like even though women in the military are not cruel as often or to the extent that men are, they still aren't innocent and sometimes participate or go along with their male teammates cruelty, Thats pretty much it.

Also no offense but i feel like something from 20 years ago isnt that irrelevant or far away... isnt the USA still warring with the same countries, isnt the mindset of a lot of americans very similar? When I read about jt i was so freaked out bc i thought it *wasnt* that long ago. And then I was freaked out bc well if that happened then, what's happening now? What don't we know about?

Anyways i hope I am not being rude ?? 😭😭 its just weird to be misinterpreted bc that was just random.ramblings which I tend to do ..

i dont think ur being rude! also ngl i can somewhat empathise w the ppl who joined the military in the US bc they’re poor n it gives them some opportunities. at the same ive come across some that joined for such reasons but they’ll ALSO like defend the military and promote it online and everything lol which is beyond off-putting. i reckon they cant shit talk the military online for obvious reasons but.. i assume they dont have to promote it the way they do? while i understand human nature is selfish and they are being incentivised into doing sth they may not necessarily want to, i did come across some who said they joined the military bc they’re super poor meanwhile they can afford so much useless shit that could feed entire families for a whole month 😭 and on the other side some who say that aren’t extremely poor, just not rich enough to afford most of the expensive ass universities in the US. also ppl who go into combat from those backgrounds i just think.. well. i can understand your desperation. but i do not think the brown ppl who lost their family members & saw their country go up in flames bc of ur army will. bc what they faced & continue to is far beyond the desperation you faced.

idk. i feel like either way i have no stake in this convo the way many do. i was around US army kids and while many of them were racists and xenophobes and were outright talking shit about my country & culture & entitled etc, im just not gonna have the same experience as someone from a country that allies w the US & isnt being bombed by them.

[mrkis]

a twlg ask from 🦄 anon below the cut!! yet again, i had to put it into a separate post to not clog up the dash bc of how long it is!! my response is beneath!!

Im keeping track with the discussion in Discord and all I can say is I am still team Jaemin, and I am still giving him the benefit of the doubt. We have seen fractures of what he went through up to part 3 and during part 4 & 5 a lot of stuff happened between him and mc and to me their relationship took a different route then. Also mc didnt truly fall for him up until that moment before the party in pt 3 when he said "you got me" so they are basically in the same boat up until this point, things change for her after that and I think for him too. And i'd like to think that there is so much more beneath the surface when it comes to him and how he views his relationship with mc, and her as a person.

Like I said in my previous ask yeah at first he sees her as only a fuck buddy, but its normal considering they never really knew each other and had any sort of a bond. I cant blame him for wanting and asking for what they agreed upon in the first place, its also not his fault how mc reads his actions, she doesnt know whats inside his head neither does he know whats inside of hers. Communication is still a big issue for them, they tend to ignore what they want to really say to avoid "complications" or simply because they are more scared of being vulnarable with another person again and its easier to brush it off and pretend its nothing.

Im still salting about how in pt 5 he was waiting for her to talk about that important thing yet she did everything in her power to distract him and they ended up having sex, a soft one which was nice ofc and seeing how much of an effect her calling him "baby" during it had on him, I so desperately want to see his side of that. Or how easily she let him go without even considering if he wants to give Eunbin a second chance, which he clearly stated he didnt, he forgave her more for himself to have his own closure, not to give her the joy of being forgiven.

Idk, both of them have huge faults in how things got so complicate, one honest long talk is all they need to resolve atleast 99 of their issues, but both of them are cowards. I just hope that when pt6.2 comes out we will see more of how things are for him in regards to mc and how he understands it, cause sometimes its hard to understand what you feel or even accept it because of the anxiety that comes with your own reality after you embrace all those feelings and thoughts. Its scary, terrifying even. This is more personal but a few years ago I had fallen for my ex-bffs little brother and believe me when I say those were the toughest, most heartwrenching couple of months in my life. I was in such huge denial, I tried to see him as a little brother but one look from him, one simple touch on the arm had my head spinning, and during those month of internal struggle I was even hating myself (he had a gf btw). I didnt want to admit to anything infront of myself let alone anyone else, and the moment those bursted down I was a wreck. It took me months to get over him. So yeah, I can kinda get why Jaemin, and mc for that matter, struggle with their own reality of what they feel and why, cause sometimes it can feel like its wrong, like some unwritten rule was broken and the world is ending. It may not be at all wrong, we all feel what we feel and its not sth we can control. This got a bit misdirected but you get what I mean 😅

I am still team Jaemin, and until I see him genuinely being a complete and total arse toward mc, like making her feel small and unreasonable and just wrong for having feelings for him, then I will root for him. I try to put myself in his shoes and despite all his wrong doings, I can see why he would build such walls around himself and how scared he must be to let them fall.

Also, for the yy x mc endgame trope, I know he is nice and has feelings for her and all but i cant see them together. Just because they may work good because of the foundation they have for their friendship doesnt necessarily mean they would be a good couple. There are many layers to a relationship and sure they can be cute, but the amount of drama it would create within the group would be too much. Also, i feel like a part of mc will always be for Jaemin, considering the complicity of their relationship. It would also not be fair to Yang Yang to sorta be her second choice after Jaemin. If mc ends up with anyone who is not Jaemin then it should be an outside person, so she can truly move on.

[ mrkis response ] : i'm gonna section my responses in a bulleted list for you!! thank you for sending me this btw!!

its fun to hear you're giving jaemin the benefit of the doubt and that you're still team jaemin!! in six(pt1), we saw jaemins thought process from part one to part three which, i think, is different from his upcoming thought process from part four to five (and so on as i'll be continuing present day in jaemins pov after the flashback scenes are over. but they will go back to mc's pov in part seven!!) — and you're right abt mc!! she didn't fully realise she liked him into the party scene. there was always something lingering, which was the comfort between them both that she craved, but diving further into their fwb relationship and becoming exclusive, that definitely persuaded her. — there is definitely more beneath the surface when it comes to him and his relationship with mc. he does really care abt her a lot and, admittedly, she has become his best friend over this short period of time. bare in mind, in jaemins mind, it has always been jeno and jaemin. jeno has always been his number one (he still loves the other boys, haru and miwoo tho) and jeno still is his number one.. he just shares that spot with mc now. so mc does mean a lot to him!! :D

i like how you said its normal and you can't blame jaemin to see mc as a fuck buddy as that was their relationship, bc its true!! that's all it was!! and its for sure not either of their faults for not understanding whats going on inside each others heads (this is where the communication is needed for sure. its one of their biggest issues in this relationship even though they made it a rule)

with that scene in part five, that was definitely mc's fault for sure. things could've been avoided if she was open abt her growing feelings towards him but she's vulnerable!! and she's very scared!! them being vulnerable and scared also plays a huge part for sure.. it's a problem they need to work on :( —you will for sure see jaemins reaction to the first soft sex scene they've had. it was so.. intimate. something that jaemin hasn't really had in a long time. so i can't wait for you to see that!

they're definitely cowards and both at faults. like i've said before, all this trouble and pain could easily be avoided if they just talked :/ six(pt2), for me personally, is going to be an eye opener. hopefully ahhh. its where eunbin comes into play, its where jaemins head gets fucked and it shows where the people in his life truly stand.

for me, i love the yangyang and mc endgame conversations that have been going on!!! i think they would be good together, mainly bc of how much yangyang truly cares and thinks abt mc... but then again, i fully believe yangyang deserves someone better. he doesn't deserve to be a second choice :(

#fic: the way life goes #🦄anon

[thekingofwinterblog]

It’s all for his sake - Endeavor and the Sunk Cost Fallacy

My hero academia 301 is a pretty interesting chapter, but for me, the most notable piece of it was how Endeavour reacted to the realization that Touya couldnt surpass All Might.

upon realizing that his son might not be able to do it because of inborn physical limitations, he immediatly stopped his training, which frankly was the responsible and adult thing to do. 

This stint of real parenthood did not last long however.

After taking the matter to a doctor, he is flat out told that not only cant Touya achive what endeavor wants, but it is a direct result of his incredibly selfish and irresponsible attempt to play god, by trying to breed the “perfect” hero into being.

It is how you react when you lose however, that shows who you really are, and endeavor illustrates that very, very well.

Upon being told in no uncertain terms that his attempts at Breeding an heir failed magnificently, producing a child that was not capable of resisting his own immense power, but also admonished by his doctor for even attempting it, and adviced not to try again, Endeavor instead doubled down, while focusing on the child he screwed over from the start with his attempt at genetic manipulation.

It was all for him you see. Endeavor doesnt use those words, but that is how he spins it here. it was all for Touya, all for his sake. if i stop now, then Touya was all for nothing, a mistake, im doing this for my son.

if im doing this for my son, then im not responsible for any of this.

his wife however, calls him out on it, as she understands Touya much, much more than endeavor does. or rather, she sees him fully as a human being, instead of as a thing, a weapon, a failed attempt at an heir.

Unlike Endeavor, Rei is able to see the way this all is affecting her son. She is able to see, and understand that Touya has fully accepted what Endeavor wanted him to be. a stronger, and better version of himself. however, unlike Endeavor, she only cares about him as a person.

Endeavour by comparison isnt completely uncaring about Touya. like most abusive parents, he does possess love for his offspring, but it is forever tainted by the fact that however much he might care, or not care about Touya, any familial love he has for his son is tainted by the fact that to Endeavor, he is a failed experiment, a failed heir, not his child. 

He is the golden child that Endeavor was building up as his true and only heir, who he breed, trained, and molded to for that single purpose, and now that he’s reached a point where he cant continue that legacy.

so, its time to abandon him, and start over new, despite literarily having just learned how stupid this plan was, and that it can, in fact, go completely wrong, with a quirk that will fuck over the person he brings into the world.

Of course, Endeavor doesnt use those words to frame it. there is no way to pretend to be a hero, if you phrase it like that after all. Intead, this is the words he uses.

this is a very important series of panels for a great number of reasons, some that can be debated, argued, and we will probably never know the full truth to the questions because this is a series published in 2020′s shonen jump, and there are things that probably wasnt gonna fly with Hori’s editors, if it was the case.

but lets start with what can not be debated. Endeavor’s words here.

“If we want him to give it up, then we have no choice... Touya... Cant surpass him.”

These are very telling words, and however you believe The third and fourth children of the Todoroki family was concieved, there is not denying the meaning of what he’s saying here.

The only way that my son will stop being an idiot and fall into line, is if we have another baby. that is the only Right way to move forward. it is morally right, because if we dont do this, then he’s going to destroy himself.

there are two ways to interpret this scene.

The charitable way is to read it as the fact that he used Rei’s oldest son’s mental state as a justification of guilting his wife to have a third child, to give this attempt at a superpowered breeding project another shot, despite the fact that they now know that this can lead to a child who is essentially born crippled from his own powers, and despite the fact that Rei obviously understands the effect of them continuing this insanity will have on their oldest son.

the uncharitable way to look at it, is that he used this as justification for flat out raping her, and forcing a third, and then later a fourth child on her.

I personally believe the last one, given a number of factors shown in this chapter(the way this page is framed, the fact Rei obviously didnt want a third child, given she predicted exactly how touya would react, the way her eyes would latet turn when she looks at who is presumably touya which really brings to mind how she would later react to her youngest son’s face after her mental breakdown, etc.), but i’ll frankly admitt that withouth a direct quote from Hori, its impossible to know for sure one way or another. 

either way however, this is a very good example of Endeavor both being influenced by, and using Sunk Cost Fallacy to justify bringing another potentially crippled child into the world for his own, selfish goals.

sunk cost Fallacy, is a mental reaction to when you invest more time and resources into a project, that you becomes so emotionally invested into said project that you will continue to invest into it, even if it reaches a point that it becomes clear that the resources you put into it, far, far outweighs the potential gains you can achieve.

because if you give up after having invested years, and years of effort to breed, raise, and train a kid, and then all that effort was absolutely wasted. hence he choose to keep going, despite having learned what a terrible idea this is.

He doesnt care about the fact that his next child might be even more crippled than his firstborn, he doesnt care about his son’s actual wellbeing. he cares about the fact that if he doesnt continue this insanity, then not only will he not achieve his dreams, but everything he did to get to this point was for absolutely nothing.

and endeavor cannot accept that. and so long as he can justify breeding more children into the world, and there being any chance they might inherit both quirks perfectly, he doesnt care about anything else.

and the moment he realised that this kid wasnt gonna cut it either, he did it again. it is not a coincidence, that the age gap between Endeavor’s second, third, and fourth children were all 3-4 years apart. because thats the age where you can usually tell when a quirk will manifest or not, as established earlier in the series.

While she isnt brought up directly by Endeavor as a justification, it is very telling that Endeavor decided on having a third child, only after his second child was old enough that he could tell that that there was no chance she could take the place as his heir instead.

So, he had his third child, and as time passed and it became obvious that he wasn’t gonna be able to fulfill Endeavor’s goals either, he dumped him, and instead breed a fourth child into existence.

and finally, he struck gold. he did it. he produced Shoto.

everything was finally worth it, and now, everything would be absolutely fine. the cost fallacy had reached its end, and it was now all full sails ahead.

except of course it wasnt.

His oldest son, now in middle school, had been raised from birth to believe he would surpass his father, only to be thrown away, and getting to see his father try to replace him, not once, but twice.

frankly, this scene is probably my favorite in the chapter, because it goes to show Endeavor’s mindset. Natsuo made a point that their father completely ignored his older children. and he did... from Natsuo’s perspective. however, having a more thourough picture of things, we can clearly see that this wasnt the case with Touya.

Endeavor genuinly cared for Touya, enough that once he got that child he tried to breed into existence 4 times, he genuinly wanted him to just abandon trying to be a hero. he genuinly thinks of himself as a good dad here, wanting his son to abandon the mission he set out for him before he was born. of course, with context, this heartwarming scene is incredibly sad and insidious, because we understand why Endeavor got so attached to his oldest child. because he WAS the golden child. he was the child Endeavor genuinly cared about, and invested in, and trained personally with great warmth and enthusiasm.

And not only did he abandon him as a failed project the moment he realized he wasnt gonna live up to his ridiculous standards, but he literarily created 2 more kids to try and replace him, just as his oldest son was old enough to understand what exactly his dad was doing. over the course of this chapter, we get to see Touya’s start as a 5-8 year old, his deteriorating mental state over the years, until he finally seemed to reach the breaking point with Shoto’s birth sometime in his middle school years 12-15. 

Endeavor is in this scene, just not capable of understanding why Touya so desperately wants to become a hero, when obviously he isnt physically able to do so. he isnt able to understand that he is 100% to blame for the fact that his son is having a full emotional breakdown after literaly being replaced by his siblings. 

In other words, Endeavor genuinly think’s he’s a good person. a person who has made a few mistakes along the way sure, but a person who was always justified in the end, and now that he’s having to face the fact that as dabi would later say “The past never dies” and has to face the aftermath of his inane attempt to play god for the pettiest of reasons, things simply arent going to work out.

He isnt going to have a happy family, who can now put the awful early years behind them, he put way too much effort, caused too much suffering and sacrificed too many years of his life for this not to work out as he wants.

after all, if he walks away from this project now, and lets Shoto have a normal childhood, and decide for himself, with no pressure from him, wheter or not to become a hero, then the sunk cost fallacy will have reached a negative end. it will all have been for nothing.

and we know he did eventually double down on this mentality, literarily beating into Shoto that he WAS going to become a hero, and there was not but’s or no’s about it.

there was no way that Endeavor was EVER going to let things be for nothing. His treatment of his older children could not be for nothing. His treatment of his wife could not be for nothing. His treatment of Shoto, and the way he beat him black and blue to train him, could not be for nothing.

Because if it all was for nothing, if everything he feels guilty about was for absolutely nothing, then he was in fact, a bad, bad person, who had no justification for anything he ever did.

#my hero academia #touya todoroki #dabi #endeavor #endeavour #enji todoroki #rei todoroki #character study #301 #meta

[renaisaibaam]

interview

zhongli / female reader smut fic

degrading, dirty talking

idk how to tag lol

vvvv vulgar i am ashamed

"fuck, zhongli—" you moaned pathetically as you felt his cock slide into you in a slow, gentle pace that absolutely drived you insane, your breath shallow yet heavy, with your back pressed against the cold, wooden surface of your shared apartment's dining table. your boyfriend had just come home from a job hunt, and was expecting a call from one of the places he had visited, so to pass some time, he had decided to have his dinner almost immediately upon his arrival, his dinner being you, in the table instead of the bedroom, and with how im using this analogy to describe him just eating you out for his meal, its rather appropriate to have it in the dining room in this context.

his hands were underneath your thighs that were dripping with hot sweat, keeping them hoisted up as his hips moved slowly and steadily, whines leaving your lips from the fucking tease he was being. a scowl crosses his face, and he bends down to sink his teeth on the soft flesh of the underside of your thigh, not caring when you let out a pained yelp. he knew you liked the pain, anyways.

"arent you being a greedy little slut right now? do you want me to ruin you that bad?" he pulls out of your dripping cunt until only the tip of his cock is in, and without any warning, slams it back in until he's ball deep inside you, your back arching when you feel his cock hit the deepest parts of you. your hands move up to claw on his toned, almost rock hard arms, leaving red marks in your wake as tears filled the corner of your eyes from the pleasure of the sudden movement that he kept repeating without giving you time to even catch your own breath.

"didn't i teach you how to fucking wait? just how deprived are you from cock, when you've just had it last night?" he growls into your skin before rutting into your cunt in a rough pace, the unanticipated action making you scream his name in ecstacy. you were already in cloud nine by this point- zhongli filled you up so good; so well to where you wouldnt even think of anything else but him and his cock. he messed you up in the best ways possible, and you knew you could never go back once you had a taste of him.

you could hear the belt around his pants clinking to the pace of his thrusts inside you, and the cold metal slamming against the back of your thigh added to the many sensations you were feeling, considering he didnt even bother taking off his own clothes except for his coat and blazer while he stripped you off of everything, with the exception of his favorite sweater that you had worn, seeing how much of his scent lingered in the cozy, soft fabric of it. he loved seeing you in his clothes, but the hem of the sweater, however, was already up to your neck to expose your chest that had been bouncing to the rhythm of his hips. the cold air made your nipples hard, but you barely cared.

he bends down, cups your right breast with one hand, and swirls his tongue flat around your hardened bud, his other hand keeping your legs up in place. your hands that were adorned with sweater paws reached up to stroke his hair, and he looked up with a smile, moving towards you to lock your lips together in a heated kiss that held an overflowing amount of passion for each other. well, it was like that until a sudden ring of someone's phone interrupted your kiss with zhongli.

he pulls away with a string of saliva connecting you and him, and he grabs the ringing phone from his pocket, checking the number and immediately answering it, not pulling away from you as he spoke.

"hello?" he asks with his usual deep and calming voice, as if he hadn't been fucking you into oblivion just a few seconds ago. he puts the phone on loud speaker, and listens to the caller's voice closely.

"hi! this is from the wangsheng funeral parlor. do you mind if we conduct the interview over the phone so you dont have to come over? we're pretty busy at the moment with the influx of interviews." what a cockblock, you thought. just as you were about to pull away, zhongli stands up straight and grabs your hips with one hand, keeping you in place as he turned off the loud speaker and held the phone to his ear, speaking in the most professional voice that shook your core when it reached your ears.

"sure, i dont mind. lets proceed immediately."

you looked up at him with a face expecting him to release you, as he was slowly pulling away until he was out, but you let out a loud yelp when he suddenly slams back in to stuff you full of his cock, the rhythm of his thrusts still steady and deep despite the talking he was doing over the phone.

you couldnt believe it. zhongli was fucking you in the dining table as he had his motherfucking job interview. what would happen if this shit went wrong? you clawed at his arms to grab his attention and make him stop, but he just stared down at you, and was silent for what felt like eternity, before he gave a hard slap to the side of your exposed thigh, his thrusts only getting faster each time you resisted.

you were trying your best not to let out any sounds, but the way his cock was hitting on the spots that made you feel the best was sending you to euphoria. he made you feel so good almost without effort, and this situation in general just turned you on. what if the person on the phone could hear the sounds you made? what if they could hear just how much sounds your cunt was making from how much it had been dripping for him, and only him?

you could have sworn you had came twice or even more, and yet his interview hasnt ended despite you already meeting your release multiple times. and even when you did, he didnt stop for one bit. he had no plans to, anyways. as he spoke about what might be best for the company as an answer to the question, he leans down to mark the skin around your collarbone with a bite, sucking it as if he were to excrete something sweet if he did it hard enough.

you feel something different yet familiar bubbling up your abdomen, and you knew you were about to reach your orgasm again, and since you couldnt take any more of it, you mouth to zhongli to stop, or at least slow down, desperation in your expression. his bright eyes, which seemed to darken, stared down on you as still fucking spoke with annoyance dripping in his voice as he answers, "i think we can negotiate my salary based on my skills and the value i bring to the company."

this was enough to tell you that the interviewer asked a stupid question, and that he was pissed about it, yet remained cool headed despite it. and to take the frustration out, he places the phone between his ear and shoulder, grabs your legs and hoists you up even higher than what you were usually used to, and plunges his cock even deeper into you to the point where you can see his tip poking out from your stomach, the new and foreign feeling making you clench around his cock to which he lets out a low, and deep grunt at.

with only a look towards you as your single warning, he slams down into your tight cunt, the sudden pleasure coursing through your veins in a rush that leaves you feeling lightheaded. you cover your mouth with your hands and scream through the fabric of his sweater, feeling yourself reach your high and release for who knows how many times you did ever since the damned call, your hands shaking from the immense sensation and pleasure zhongli had brought you tonight.

all that had happened, and yet he didnt even fucking stop.

you were an overstimulated mess, and as a last resort, you whine loudly to try and grab his attention for who knows how many times, wanting this to be over already. you couldnt stand holding back your voice, and you knew itd do more harm if they had heard you. but zhongli wasnt having any of it.

he places you back down on the table with him still inside you, grabs his phone with his left hand to hold it up to his ear, and uses his right hand to wrap it around your throat, squeezing the sides in a way he knows you love so much. you gasp when you feel his huge, rough hand around you, and as if that wasnt enough, his hips slam back into you, driving you into a quiet, drooling mess. your eyes rolled back, and amidst the silence, your body shook violently to try and get him off of you, your hole unable to handle any more of the overstimulation he drove you into.

you feel your mind going blank and hazy from the emotions and feelings you had been experiencing. the fear of being caught, the excitement of trying not to get caught, the pleasure of his cock filling you up to the brim, the overstimulation and high of your recent orgasm, and the lack of oxygen is throwing you into an overwhelmed state, and yet here you were, living for it.

your hips shake, and you squirt into his cock, feeling your own release dripping down your legs as you made a mess on the floor and on zhongli's skin. you feel your legs give in and drop to his sides, looking up at him as he continued speaking as if you werent even there. but even if he was acting that way, his lust filled eyes stared at you hungrily, his tongue swiping his lips in a manner that you'd think was purposely trying to rile you up.

"okay, i understand. i'll come in tomorrow, so please take care of me." and with that, he ends the call, and growls lowly, placing the phone beside you. he lifts up your legs, and leans in until your face is just centimeters away from you, a low growl emitting fron him as he spoke.

"just how much did you cum in under 20 minutes? did you enjoy it knowing we could get caught?" his hips rocks itself into you deeply, and stays in that position, your hips shaking. you could feel him fill you up to where your abdomen felt full of him and only him, and you looked up at him, whining at his words.

"fucking whore. you even made a mess on me. did it feel that good, doll?" he opens his mouth and crashes his lips on to yours, quickly moving down to bite the skin around the side of your throat where his hands once were, leaving marks on both sides. he moves up to whisper on your ear, his voice making you tremble as you felt his hot breath whispering such dirty words that you knew he was going to fulfill. guess you were staying at home tomorrow.

"ill make sure you cum all over my cock more tonight, so be a good girl and take me in well. are we clear?"

#genshin impact #genshin impact zhongli #genshin impact smut #zhongli x reader

[formulawonu]

flutters / mick schumacher

(not my gif! creds to owner <3)

warning: kissing, getting a little touchy,, and just being flustered idk

summary: *requested by @gpiggy98​ <3* mick has just finished an intense race and you’re the only person he really wants to be around at the moment since you’re his best friend. you’ve secretly liked him for a while now and offer/give him a massage to cool down after the race and you can’t help but get flustered at the intimacy of the moment.

a/n: honestly. what would i give to have mick as my best friend. what would i give to basically have mick in my life. FOR REAL. ugh mick schumacher supremacy. anw i didnt know how to end this one properly so idk if im 100% satisfied but it was fun writing hsjakdhasd but enjoy anyway x (i’m always open to requests btw!!!!)

It’s the end of the Hungarian Grand Prix and you feel like you can finally breathe properly after a couple of hours. You’d think you’d have gotten used to going through race weekends by now but you always seem to find your breath caught in your throat and worrying over the safety of your best friend. Mick had finished in p12 - his current best finish throughout the season - and you were extremely proud of him. Despite how well he did defending from other cars on the field in the car he has, you can tell from the way his brows furrow together after removing his helmet that he’s far from satisfied. Watching him go through the procedure after each race required by the FIA from the garage, you decide to make your way back to the hospitality in order to not get into anyone’s way. You figured that you would just talk to Mick when he was free and tell him proud you are of him. What you were not expecting was Mick to show up at the hospitality earlier than you had expected, his body language clearly still tense, and motioning you with just his head to follow him up to his assigned driver’s room. He doesn’t really stop to wait for you or anything because he knows you understand that he doesn’t want to be around a lot of people right now. It leaves you feeling pleased that you’re still the one he wants to talk to. Perks of being his best friend.

“Hey, you.” You say as you enter Mick’s room, shutting the door behind you. You stand there for a while, leaning against the door as you take in Mick sitting down on the couch, his eyes shut with his head thrown back. His hair is all messy from wearing his helmet but it looks good anyway. You knew this wasn’t the right time to be thinking it, but you’d be lying to yourself if you didn’t acknowledge how Mick made looking stressed extremely attractive. Sexy, even. Mick pops open one eye as he lazily looks at you. “I’m so frustrated.” He mumbles. He then pats the space beside him, telling you to come sit beside him. You make your way to the couch and plop down beside him, trying not to mind the way your heart beats faster as the distance between you both has marginally decreased. Immediately after and without warning, Mick drops his head on your lap. You want to blame the lack of AC for the sudden rise of temperature in the room you’re both in, but you know that the heat is really just rising in your cheeks as you imagine how close Mick is to your body. “I’m so tired.” He continues, shutting his eyes again. You can’t stop the way your heart is rapidly beating inside of your chest and you wouldn’t be surprised if Mick could actually hear it. The vibrations that come from Mick’s voice run through your whole body, leaving you to slightly shift your thighs closer together. You bring your hands to run through his hair, hoping to distract yourself from your own thoughts by giving him a small massage. Mick hums in response. You rub small circles into his temples, picturing him doing the same thing to you in another area of your body. You have to stop yourself there. You seriously cannot be thinking about this while you’re trying to distract yourself from the fact that Mick, your best friend, is all hot and sweaty. Well, there’s always points for trying. 

You don’t realize you’ve stopped the small massage you were giving him until you feel Mick’s hand grip your knee. “Why’d you stop? That felt so good.” The heat rushes to your cheeks and you can feel Mick’s eyes on your face. You can’t bring yourself to meet his eyes because you’re flustered at how dirty your thoughts had gotten because of a few words Mick had muttered in passing. The fact that his hand was still on your knee also did not help your case. It was something you had come to terms with a while ago: you deeply liked your best friend - that was why you were acting like this around him. You had tried your best to ignore the fuzzy feelings that came up every time you thought of him or the way your stomach would drop whenever he was around. You tried to deny and cover it up by saying you just really appreciated him as a person, but you eventually gave in and realized it was pointless to fight your feelings. It didn’t matter anyway. Mick was still your best friend, regardless of whatever feelings you had for him. 

“Oh. Sorry.” You mutter, still refusing to look at him as you try to will the heat in your cheeks to disappear. You knew not to make eye contact with Mick because those damn eyes knew you almost better than you knew yourself so meeting them would just spell out disaster for you. He would figure out something was off immediately. You begin moving your hands again through Mick’s hair, kneading in a new pattern. Your eyes land on the hand still resting on your knee. You focus on it as you continue to massage Mick when suddenly it begins to draw circles of its own nearer your inner thigh. Your breath hitches in your throat and you accidentally tug at Mick’s hair because of your unguarded reaction to his hand. You quickly look at his face to see if he’s felt that (though surely he has) and you find yourself looking into a pair of amused eyes. There’s a hint of playfulness in them as he’s probably made the connection that you are... well... currently going through it. “You okay, there?” He whispers, raising an eyebrow at you. You try to play it off, as you usually do. “Yeah. Why wouldn’t I-” His hand moves higher up and you involuntarily pause. “-be.” You swallow and desperately try to focus on anything else but the hand that is now closer to you than you had ever imagined it to be. How white the wall is, how cool Mick’s helmet is, how comfortable the couch is. Mick suddenly shifts his position and the hand on your thigh disappears. You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding in. The place where Mick’s hand once was now feels incredibly bare. Mick is still moving around until he’s positioned himself to be facing you, still lying down, with his head propped up by his hand. The arm propping his head up is over your legs - suddenly, you feel like you’ve fallen into a dangerous trap. 

“Hey there.” He whispers, smiling at you with those damn eyes filled with amusement. Like he knows. “Hi?” His free hand moves to trace lines up and down your arm. Goosebumps immediately come and you shiver. He smiles even wider, noting the way your body has unintentionally reacted to his touch. “Are you cold?” He continues to run a finger up and down your arm, mindlessly drawing his own patterns. His eyes never leaving yours. You know you should be answering him now, replying with anything really, but his hand has made its way back down and is now drawing circles on the part of your thigh he’s resting on. “Am- Am I what?” You ask, not remembering what he’s just said a few seconds ago. Your eyes move to glance at Mick’s hand then back to his face. Mick then fully sits up, this time lifting your legs to rest over his lap. “Something’s bothering you.” He says, gently turning your chin to have you face him. Your eyes land on his lips before you meet his eyes. “Not at all. I am just peachy.” He chuckles as you inwardly cringe, knowing full well that you didn’t sound convincing at all. What were you supposed to do when his other hand was now drawing those same distracting circles this time on your side. You had never been this close with Mick. You weren’t supposed to be this close to Mick. His eyes drop to your lips. “Can I try something to get whatever it is off your mind?” He whispers. You nod before you can think about what he’s just offered, too taken by how Mick’s face seems to be inching ever so closely to yours by the second. Your eyes flutter shut when you feel the touch of another pair of lips on yours. It starts out slow, almost shy, as if he’s checking to make sure you’re okay with what’s happening. But then you pull him closer to you, slightly parting your lips to invite him in. Your hands make their way around his neck and tugging at the ends of his hair. The pace has suddenly shifted and Mick has lifted you on top of him, letting you straddle him as he now moves his hands up and down the sides of your body. 

There was no way this was actually happening. All you wanted to do a couple of moments ago was tell Mick how proud you were of him. You push your body closer to his, trying to eliminate the almost nonexistent space between the two of you. Mick moans in your mouth, his hands gripping your waist tighter. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you for so long.” He says in between kisses. He’s trailing kisses down your jaw then your neck. “Me too. You have no idea.” You breathe into his ear. You’re about to kiss him again when suddenly you hear a knock at the door. You both pause, looking at each other wide-eyed. 

“Mick, it’s Guenther. We need to debrief quickly. Won’t take long, I swear.” You slowly move off of Mick, trying not to make noise. You were sure no one thought you guys were doing anything weird anyway but you didn’t want to be caught looking like it. Mick is still sitting next to you, both of you trying not to laugh. It’s almost like he doesn’t want Guenther to think he’s in the room. “Mick,” You hear knocks coming from the other side of the door. “The earlier we start, the quicker you can get back. Hi to Y/N, who is in there too.” You both burst out laughing, the jig obviously up. Mick finally gets up, chuckling and accepting he has to go and start debriefing. 

“I’ll see you when I get back. Still need to get that thing off of your mind.” He says, winking at you as he steps out of the room. 

#f1 imagine #formula 1 imagine #f1 oneshot #mick schumacher #mick schumacher imagine #formula one imagine #formula 1 oneshot #formula one oneshot #f1 fanfic #driver x reader #fanfic #f1 #oneshot #imagine #formula 1 fanfic #HELP #haas

[katsukikiss]

FAKE DATE

SHOTO x F!READER // COLLEGE AU // CHARACTERS ARE AGED UP // MINORS DNI

WARNINGS: NSFW 18+ obviously, general smut nothing crazy, unprotected sex, semi-public?

You and Bakugo broke up not too long ago, so you try to get back at him in a way that’ll hurt…

AN: I just whipped this up and have NOT proofread whatsoever so be kind pls. I’ve been afk working on a large Kiri fic so im sorry about being unactive :( send me requests tho! Im tryna come back with a regular posting schedule

WC: 2.2k

Masterlist

“Thank you for doing this Shoto!! Your the bestest friend ever you have no idea!” you squealed, hugging his arm tightly. He had just agreed to take you to the spring formal as his ‘date’. He wasn’t extremely supportive of going together for the sole purpose of making Bakugo jealous, but he just couldn’t say no to your adorable begging over the last few days.

“Yeah no problem y/n, I hope it works out” he mumbles, his face looking distraught for a moment before returning to an expressionless gaze.

“Pick me up at 7 okay half n half?” you said, releasing your grip on his arm. He nodded with a little smile and you were off to get ready. You and Bakugo had a bitter separation not too long ago and you were determined to get back at him. Shoto was a lifelong friend of yours so he didn’t take offense to your idea of using him as a pawn, he just thought it was a bit childish but went along with it nevertheless.

“I suggest you hurry, were going to be late!” Shoto yelled, leaning against the door of his car. You had to run back inside to grab your lip gloss, you wanted to be prepared to reapply as necessary.

“IM COMING!” you wailed back. The uneven pavement had you struggling to run but Shoto was quick to rescue you, offering you and arm to hold onto as you both ran back to the car. He proceeded to open the door for you.

“Always been such a gentlemen” you cooed, quickly tapping a finger onto his nose before getting comfortable in the passenger seat. You did that to him a lot, and It drove him crazy every single time. It was your own little way of showing him affection, showing him that you cared. He walked back around the car and got into the drivers seat.

Before entering, you went over a little game plan with your date. You had wanted to really get a rise out of Bakugo tonight, so nothing was off limits, touching, dancing, flirting, even kissing, which Shoto instantly shut down. As long as they kept things realistic, there was no way they’d be caught.

You and Shoto just barely arrived on time, walking in through the double doors holding hands. You both coordinated your outfits so you two looked like a match made in heaven. You couldn’t lie to yourself, Shoto looked enticing all dressed up like that. Suddenly, your hands began to feel very warm…too warm; Shoto was nervous.

“Hey Sho, youre kind of burning me”

“Oh dear god, I’m so sorry let me just-” he tries to pull his hand from yours but you only squeeze tighter.

“Just cool down, you look amazing, and you are NOT letting go of my hand right now” you whispered, trying to reassure him. He only nodded, trying to focus on turning down the heat in his body, but your little compliment made it hard for him to relax. You both made your way to a table that had some familiar faces like Izuku and Ochako; and the table directly across the open floor was Bakugos and the rest of his friends. You all talked and drank and ate, but you kept glancing over, only to see Bakugo avoiding your direction completely. You felt a hand grab onto your thigh and squeeze gently, causing you to jump a bit.

“Y/n, can we, just enjoy our night together? I don’t like to see you all worked up” Shoto admitted. He seemed much more relaxed than before, but there was a hint of anger in his voice. Of course he was concerned about you and your feelings, but the way Bakugo had treated you and continues to make you feel is something that ignites rage within him. You placed your hand on top of his and looked back up at him.

“I’m sorry Sho, you’re right, want to go dance?” you suggested. He wasn’t really the dancing type but he couldn’t pass up on the offer to hold you close. He stood up first and outstretched a hand to you. You gracefully held onto it and allowed yourself to be pulled out of your seat. You signal for the rest of your table to join you guys, hoping that might ease both you and Shoto’s nerves. You two made your way onto the dance floor, a somber acoustic song began playing. You wrapped your arms over his shoulder and behind his neck, his hands sat on your waist just above your hips. You began to confidently sway and step side to side with one another. You laid your head on his chest, getting lost in the moment with him. His heart was beating a million miles a second, he was desperately trying to contain the rising warmth he was feeling.

“You look incredible tonight y/n, I hope you know that, even if this stupid plan didnt work” he mumbled. You felt a bit defeated, but having Shoto by your side the entire night helped you feel a lot better.

“Thank you Sho, I actually wanted to tell you th-“

“I think its my turn icyhot, thanks for holding my place” Bakugo growled, grabbing your arm and turning you to face him. You looked back at Shoto, his mouth was slightly agape, his eyes wide. He looked angry and stepped to reach for you but you cut him off.

“I’ll tell you what I wanted to say later, I promise” you said, turning back to face Bakugo. Shoto’s face went blank before turning and walking away. Bakugos hands were gripping your sides with ferocity.

“What do you want?” you muttered in a low voice, trying to keep your conversation private while dancing.

“Oh nothing, just wanted to see how my girl was doing” he said with a cocky grin. Anger started rising in your chest.

“Not your girl dumbass, and im doing just fine thanks for asking” you retorted, still swaying side to side.

“So you and Todoroki huh? You really are a slut arent you?” he scoffed at you. You shoved him away from you, tears forming in your eyes. He stood back and looked at you with a devilish smile. You scanned the room for Shoto but he was nowhere to be found.

“Go fuck yourself Katsuki” you stuttered out, before pushing your way past him and running into the bathroom. You locked the door behind yourself and leaned against the wall before sliding down onto the ground. You sat there for a moment, you had only ever been with Bakugo, but to hear him call you a slut was a slap in the face. There was no way you could forgive him now, he wasnt who he used to be anymore. You wiped your tears and made your way to the mirror to fix your face up a bit. Then you heard a knock.

“Um occupied?” you called out.

“Y/n open the door” Shoto spoke. You shuffled over to the door and unlocked it and before you could speak he had you in his arms, stepping into the bathroom with you. He shut and locked the door behind himself.

“Sho I’m sorry, I-I just wanted to see what he had to say, I shouldn’t have left you like that..” you said, your voice trembling.

“Its okay, I understand” he reassured you. He was always so rational and compassionate, two things you really needed. He held onto your arms and pulled away from you, looking up and down.

“You still look amazing y/n” he cooed. You blushed a bit before speaking.

“Thank you…I wish I felt amazing though” you whispered, looking down at your feet.

“You know I can help you with that…” he stated plainly. Your head cocked back up to look at him. His gaze was intense, he was being serious. You opened your mouth to speak but his lips were already on yours, shutting you up, and you weren’t going to object. He kept kissing you while walking you back into the sink counter. He easily lifted you up and placed your thighs onto the cold marble. Your short dress allowed him to spread you open so he could stand close. The kissing got ferocious, you both needed more right now. He moved down to your neck and began sucking all over it. You let out little cries feeling his wet tongue snake all around your tender skin. A cold hand was sneaking under your short dress and wet panties to touch your folds.

“Is this okay?” he asked you. You moaned under the feeling of his icy fingers toying with your clit.

“Y-yess its more than okay” you stuttered back. Your confirmation made him speed up, his fingers moving at an inhuman speed. Your legs shook violently as you reached your climax, gushing all over your legs and his fingers. You let out a few deep breaths before placing a hand on his belt and tugging on it.

“More please” you begged, looking up into his heterochrome eyes. That look you gave him, combined with your sweet begging drove him wild.

“Anything for you princess” he groaned. He swiftly undid his belt, allowing his pants to fall to the floor and pressed a kiss onto your lips again while fisting himself. Your tongues mingled with passion, exchanging saliva with one another creating a wet sloppy mess. He moved his hips closer to you now, his cock pressed firmly against your needy cunt. He pulled his lips from yours and looked you in the eyes as he slowly pushed himself into you. He watched your face twist and contort with pleasure as he bottomed out inside you. He grabbed you by the neck with two hands, pushing your head back to lean into the mirror as he began his assault on your cunt. He wanted to see every little face you made while he pounded into you.

“Tell me, tell everyone who’s making you feel this good” he muttered.

“Fuck Shoto ahh y-you are” you cried. Your mind was running wild at the sensation of his cock stretching your walls.

“Louder, I said tell everyone” he demanded, thrusting into you even harder. One hand left your neck and began to savagely attack your sensitive clit.

“SHOTO YOU’RE MAKING ME FEEL SO F-FUCKING GOOD” you screamed, the stimulation of his hand on your clit and his cock in your cunt made all coherent thoughts leave your body; You didn’t care who heard you at this point. A satisfied smile creeped over his face.

“Thats better baby, now cum for me” he insisted. You had barely come down from your first high and the next one was already so close. Both of your moans were filling the the tiled bathroom, along with the slaps of his balls against your bare ass. You let out long and loud cries as you came undone for him again.

“AHH fuck god dammit!” you howled out. Your hands clutched onto his shoulders with all your strength as your entire body convulsed with the waves of ecstasy washing over you.

“Good fucking girl” he bucked his hips into you quicker now, chasing his own high. “I don’t wanna see you crying over him ever again” he groaned while still pounding into you. Pleasured tears started to form in your eyes from the sensation, from his voice, from the moment.

“Now those are the tears I like to see” he gruffed. He placed both his hands on your face, thinbing away the little streams falling down your cheeks. His relentless thrusts started to let up as his cock twitched inside you, spewing his hot white liquid all over your plush walls. He leaned over on top of you, letting out deep breaths and sighs. He pulled himself slowly out of you, causing a small mewl to escape your lips. He pulled his pants back on and stood between your dripping legs that were still spread open on the countertop. You wrapped your arms around him and he pulled you close into his chest. He placed a hand on top of your head and pat.

“How are you feeling now?” he asked smiling. You removed your head and looked up at him.

“M-much better…I kind of want to ditch this party now though” you whined. Any thoughts you had of Bakugo were gone and all you wanted to do was be with your ‘fake date’ for real.

“Say no more, does my place sound okay?” he asked with hopeful eyes. You nodded and jumped off the counter, pulling your dress down. Part of you felt embarrassed for what just transpired in the bathroom how loud you two must’ve been, but you felt okay knowing Shoto was by your side, holding your hand. He unlocked the door and led the two of you out. Kirishima and Kaminari were passing by and gave you two funny looks.

“I hope you got what you wanted y/n, Bakugo left and hes prettyyyy pissed” Kirishima spoke. You looked up at Shoto who had his same stoic expression on his face. You looked back at the two boys and smiled before speaking.

“I got something a lot better actually” you retorted, holding tightly onto your dates arm as you turned to exit. Both the boys had a dumbfounded look on their face, and Shoto’s face was dusted with pink at your response. You walked out arm in arm, making your way to the exit to to back to his house.

#bnha smut #mha smut #my hero academia #shoto todoroki #shoto x reader #shoto fluff #shoto x you #bakugou katsuki #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou x reader

[words-for-holland]

Always Yours

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Sometimes dating a celebrity is hard...but Tom & Y/N have always said no matter what happens they could get through anything. Some angst but a lot of fluff.

A/N: So sorry for leaving yall hanging! Life is just crazy right now and this blog needs a lot of TLC tbh!! Also ehh I def dont think this was my best work but enjoy?

“Oof” Y/N lets out as she plops on to her boyfriend who was lying comfortable on the couch. Tom groaned at the impact with a cheeky smile on his face, his arms instantly wrapping around Y/N’s frame.

“Y’know..there are empty seats right there.” The soft brown-eyed boy gestured with the flick of his thick head as Y/N raises her eyes looking down at him, pretending to be slightly offended.

“Oh I see how it is then. It’s cool...Ill just cuddle with Tessa instead. I know she would welcome me with open arms instead of—” As she slowly starts getting off his chest, Tom is quick to pull her back in, securing her with his strong arms. “No baby, I was just kidding. I want you right here, and Im never letting you go.” he pleas.

The only thing Y/N could manage was letting out a fit of giggles into his chest, a sound that Tom adored and would do absolutely anything to hear every minute of every day. They stay like this for a while enjoying the feeling of each other as they both run their hands into each others hair, the feeling of their chests moving up and down, the subtle thumps of their heartbeats, and the little slips of adoration that came out of their mouths. It was peaceful. A moment that nobody could really take a way because it was theirs.

Y/N casually pulls up her phone, and scrolls through Twitter when she noticed a particular tweet on her timeline. Her eyebrows furrow, as she read the 160 character message.

Why Tom Holland Should Be With Aaliyah Cole and Dump Y/N: A Thread.

She knew it wasnt a good idea to open up the thread. She knew very well that everything within the shallow string of tweets would be a complete waste of her time because it was made up by fans who just wanted to satisfy their fantasy of shipping Tom with his co-star. Who can blame them? They always had great chemistry, but it was part of the job and thats all it would ever be.

“You’re awfully quiet.” Tom murmurs, as he places soft kisses at the crown of her head. “Whats going on?” She was lucky her phone was facing away from Tom, quickly closing the app and pretending to be on one of her many tabs in Safari.

“Mmm..nothing.” Y/N lies softly, a tight-lipped smiled plastered on her face.

“Absolute bullocks. Youre not a very good liar.” He chuckles. “Tell me darling. Whats on your mind?”

Y/N rolls her eyes in response. She’s heard that comment one too many times in her life from everyone shes known. After not giving it much thought, she gives in, sighing heavily. “Dont judge me for what Im about to say.”

“Mmm...I think it might depend on wha— Ow” Tom reacts as he playfully rubs the side of his chest that Y/N hit. “Okay too soon for jokes. Go on.”

Again, Y/N sighs as she props herself up. “Its just ... well a lot of your fans keeps talking about wanting you to get with Aaliyah.” She looks down trying not to make eye contact with Tom, who she’d imagine was looking at her with annoyance.

Tom rolls his eyes at the ridiculousness. Not so much at Y/N but the fact that some of his fans just didnt want to accept the fact that he was happy with Y/N. If it had to come from his mouth to stop the stupid rumors and give his girlfriend peace, then hed gladly yell it from the rooftops for everyone to hear. “Thats it Im making a statement about it.”

Y/N’s eyes widen in fear, scrambling to prevent him from grabbing his phone on the table next him. “No no no no.” She repeatedly declines. “You’ll only make it worse.”

“Darling, Im not going to stand here and watch you get all insecure because of their delusional ship.”

“Yeah well Im not gonna be the reason your fans hate me because Im getting in the way of your friendship with Aaliyah Cole.” She fires back.

Tom was ready to open his mouth only to be cut off once again. “And you know better. That is how your fans will always see it.”

“Okay, are you done?” He calmly asked, cautiously observing her. Rarely did Y/N ever get worked up about anything, but when she had her tangents, Tom always made sure she got off everything she needed to say before he becomes her voice of reason.

“Yeah, I guess.” she says feeling defeated. “Look its whatever and Im tired, can we just let this go and forget this whole conversation even happened?”

Tom was unconvinced, but didnt want to push her further. So reluctantly, he gave in and wrapped his arms around Y/N as they both tried to lull themselves to sleep.

***

Y/N wasnt sure how she ended up in the Tube. It was strange how the lights flickered off the rusted tile floor. The train was no where to be seen, but off to the side of the railroads was pitch black, she could hardly see beyond. To her right she noticed herself standing in the corner of the room, and to her surprise Aaliyah was there. Her milk chocolate kissed skin, and fashionably long frizzy hair dropped down past her shoulders. Her figure long and poised, as she wore a rain jacket and sweats. An outfit only she could pull off and make it look like she was a model for Vogue. Aasliyah smiles brightly at Y/N.

“Hey Y/N.” She says cheerfully as a genuine friend would.

To Y/N’s surprise she greeted her back in the same tone. “Hey Aaliyah...uhh whats going on?” Y/N wasnt sure if she wanted the answer of how they both ended up in the Tube or if she truly wanted to know how her day went.

“Well Im getting ready to present at the Oscars.” She replies, a smile plastered as if she was so excited about it, almost too excited like she was keeping a secret.

“Really? Oh my god, that’s amazing! Im so proud of you Aaliyah! Who are you taking?”

Aaliyah pauses for a few moment looking back and forth, making sure no one else was around. “Okay can you keep a secret?” She whispered.

Y/N nods her head slowly, not having the slightest clue of what was going on. “Im taking Tom. I think he really likes me, and well...I like him too! Do you think maybe I should ask him when we go?” Aaliyah asked genuinely. It was almost like she had no recollection of Y/N and Tom being a couple. “I think we would look good together. Everyone is already making rumors and ships about us.”

Y/N backs aways lowly only to bump into a broad figure. As she turns around she sees Tom, emotionless and almost sad. “Y/N.” He speaks out. “I dont think this is going to work out. Im leaving you.”

Y/N’s heart quickens, and her breaths become shorter as she tries to find a way to run. Running and running into the darkness, until all she could hear was Tom’s faint voice calling out her name.

***

“Y/N! Y/N! Baby wake up please.” Tom cries as he gently shakes his girlfriend from her disturbed sleep.

Quickly Y/N opens her eyes and clutches on to Toms hoodie firmly. Back home, and in Toms arms. It was a dream was all she thought. A sigh of relief escaping from her mouth.

“Darling...” he speaks softly, worried about his girlfriend. “Are you okay?”

Y/N looks up at him and nods frantically. “Mmm..bad dream.”

“Yeah it seemed like it. You were so frightened...I was scared. What happened?” He’s looking at her, trying to read her saddened eyes, wanting to desperately understand what scared her so he could make it all go away for her.

Y/N looks down at her fiddling hands, as she sits on the couch. “I uhh...” she lets out a chuckle, thinking of the ridiculousness of it all. “I uhh...dreamed about Aaliyah going to the oscars and saying how she loved you and how you two are perfect for each other. When I turned around I saw you but you werent happy and said you were leaving me.”

Tom doesnt say a word, all he could think about was how sorry he felt to put Y/N in this position. Though both of them knew, It wasnt Toms fault, or anyone’s for that matter. Feelings are feelings and that was okay. No human being was ever born perfect and without insecurities.

Y/N always tried to be a good sport with situations like this knowing every shippers theory and evidence were hardly ever true, but at some point there was only so much she could take before it all came out like an oil spill. Maybe it was a sign that she wasnt good enough to be with Tom if half of his fanbase thought this way as well.

Tom cradled her into his arms again, holding her tightly and kissing the top of her head. “Darling, I know youre still doubting yourself about all of this, but please believe me when I tell you that I love you so so much and no matter what happens...Im always yours.” He whispers gently in her ear. “It was only a dream and these ridiculous rumors and theories are just that. No one woman in the world could ever make me feel the way I feel for you.”

Y/N blinks softly, as she stares into space. Afraid and in a weird way ashamed, its funny how something so small and so minimal could affect her self-esteem so greatly. Tom gently brings her head up, so her eyes can meet his. He rolls his thumb on the bottom of her soft lips. “Hey, I love you.” Tom smiles.

Time stopped for the both of them the moment Y/N looked into his eyes, she felt safe. All the bad words and thoughts slowly disappear. Tom was right, none of the things that anyone said about their relationship mattered. She knew Tom loved her, and how much she truly loved him. Isnt that enough? Of course not. It was more than enough. A smile slowly forming on Y/N’s face. “Theres that smile I love so much.” He comments.

“Im sorry, for being such a —”

“No. Its okay. You have a right to feel the way you did.” He picks up her hand and leaves a gentle kiss.

“I love you so much Tom.” She says pressing her lips to his. “I dont deserve you.”

“Darling, its me that doesnt deserve you. Im always yours.” Tom proclaims as he kisses her back.

#tom holland #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #peter parker #peter parker imagine #peter parker x reader