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griffinblogsgw2 · 3 years

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The Narrative Challenge of MMOs

So I saw a post recently in the GW2 tag about how the narrative of Guild Wars is more communal vs individualistic compared to other fantasy games and, while I did like a lot of what the post said, I think it gave GW too much credit. A lot of what GW2 does is a direct result of it being an MMO and this got me thinking about the narrative challenges inherit to that.

I didn’t want to hijack their post to write about it, so here we are.

First off, hi my name is Griffin North. If you know me at all, you probably are familiar with my GW2 fan comic, Tora Steals Things (over at ToraStealsThings.com) or you know me as that random person who wrote an essay several months back about the dying tumblr fandom of GW2 that ironically blew up.

What a lot of you probably don’t know about me is that I studied Game Design for two years and have a Diploma in it. Part of what I studied was in fact narrative in games so this is where most of my knowledge on the subject comes from, consider this my disclaimer and take it for what it is.

Narrative in MMOs

Narrative in videogames is a huge topic but today I really want to talk about MMOs in general. One of the problems I saw with the post that inspired this was a comparison between Guild Wars and several fantasy games that are single player.

The demands between a single player game vs an MMO for narrative are different!

If you want to make an earnest study of Guild Wars compared to other games, it’s best to stay in the same ballpark: look at what WoW or what FFXIV are doing! That’s how you find differences! Unfortunately, I haven’t played WoW since 2007 and I haven’t even touched FFXIV so I can’t personally dive into those differences myself.

For the purpose of this essay, you can consider this as a case study of how Guild Wars 2 specifically deals with the narrative challenge of MMOs here (and why this leads to it feeling more communal as a story), but if anyone reading has anything to contribute on how other MMOs handle this I’d love to hear it!

Let’s talk about the main challenge of writing a story for an MMO

Say some new story content drops in game: you get a letter saying to go talk to a certain NPC on the map to progress the story. So you go do that only to find that said NPC is talking to a whole crowd of other players doing the exact same thing. Even as you talk to the NPC and he delivers his lines like he’s only talking to you, you know that isn’t the case -you’re not stupid after all.

Like it or not, this moment breaks the immersion of the story for a player, and this is the heart of the main issue MMOs contend with:

How do you make a player feel like the main character amongst a sea of main characters?

Game Designers want you as a player to feel special but this is immensely easier to do in a single player game than a multiplayer game. In an MMORPG, they have to deliver story that makes your character special while contending with the fact that as soon as you’re released into the world you’ll meet several other special characters played by other people. It’s really hard to feel like the magic hero with the master sword if everyone you see is also a magic hero with the master sword - get it?

How does Guild Wars handle this?

Heavy Use of Instancing

I don’t know how common this is now but when I first played Guild Wars 2, one of the things I really noticed was their heavy use of instancing when delivering story beats compared to other MMOs I’d played at the time. It’s not an elegant solution, you literally get torn out of the normal game world to play your own instance of it and that’s jarring, but it’s effective in that it allows you to be the main character of that instance. Even if you bring along friends, so long as you own the instance, your character is the one that speaks and is shown in cutscenes. Fairly simple solution, that.

The narrative immersion only really starts to break once you’re back out in the normal PvE maps with other players, and honestly there’s only so much the game can do about that.

To deal with that they contextualize the other players to justify them being there.

Guild Wars 2 narrative contextually allows space for other important player characters to exist because so much of it is organized as a war effort, and this does make a huge difference. Because you’re at war, those other players do not have to be you, the commander, to be significant. They can be various other members of the pact for example -very shiny, glittery disasters with special weapons pact members, but pact members all the same.

Guild Wars is definitely not unique in this approach though, and I think that’s obvious. World of Warcraft has you as a member of one of two different alliances at war as the game’s basic premise. I wouldn’t be surprised if FFXIV has some sort of war in it as well. It’s the easiest way to justify why these other heroes are running around in your adventure: you’re the special one, and they’re all a bunch of soldiers.

Don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t fully solve the whole breaking immersion of having a crowd of people talking to a story NPC, but this is one of the ways games like this combat the “everyone is the hero” problem.

If you’re following so far, this is why, by design, MMOs can’t be too individualistic

A war effort is a common backdrop to these kind of games because it easily justifies the multitude of players in it, but this also inevitably means that the story is going to be more communal in nature. You don’t/can’t fight a war alone.

There’s one other thing that Guild Wars does though, that makes it feel less individualistic as a narrative...

The Main Character is Special Adjacent

What I mean by this is that the main character is rarely the one the story is actually about. They’re still special, yes, but they’re special adjacent as in they’re always beside the actual special character for the story. Think about player rage about Trahearne or Kormir taking player credit and you’ll know what I’m talking about here.

The reason they do this is because it’s really hard to tell a good story about a character who’s basically a blank slate - we can’t know how the player characterizes them personally or what they’re even named. Characterize the commander too much and you risk alienating parts of your audience who view their character differently. Giving them too much of a character arc leads to the same problem. The solution then, is to allow the player to be special in SOME way but have the focus be on a different character that they CAN characterize and have grow.

Usually you’re special in how you relate to that character: you’re Trahearne’s Commander, you’re Aurene’s Champion, you’re the Boss of the various characters in Dragon’s Watch, etc. This is why the player character, the commander, doesn’t have as much growth or characterization compared to the rest of the cast.

The main character is special adjacent so that you can have your fully customized mmo character and still be the main character basically. I wouldn’t be surprised if this is true of other MMOs as well.

And this is why games like this feel less individualistic

It’s by design of how MMOs work -that’s really my point here. I love the world of Guild Wars 2 and how much of it feels like we’re fighting to save the world from ourselves or fighting nature (I see some parallels to real world shit like climate change here), but I do think it’s communal nature has more to do with it being an MMO than any real strength of its narrative.

Anyway, that’s all I got.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

#gw2 #Guild Wars 2 #guild wars story #I could honestly say more on this topic but damn if this ain't long already #I hope this was an interesting read at least

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writing-for-me-at-this-point · 4 years

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iv. Relationships w/ MC | Obey Me | Actor AU

Request: Hello! I saw that your ask box is open, so I have come bearing a request. I found ur blog thru your OM actor au and I adore it to bits. Your interpretation of the characters was delightful and the gag/bloopers had me laughing so hard! May you please expand on the au by sharing your relationship headcanons of how the cast interacts or feels about MC (platonic/romantic)? I hope this finds you well 💖💖💖

Word Count: 3225 words

Page Count: 9.2 pages

A.N. Hope you guys enjoy this!

Tags: @weebartistinc

[ M A S T E R L I S T ]

Lucifer / Benjamin

The relationship between Benjamin [ Lucifer ] and MC would more like master and apprentice. Think of RDJ and Tom Holland. Ben is more lax than his show counterpart for sure. Where Lucifer would be prideful, Ben is humble, where Lucifer is smug, Ben can be self conscious. I'd like to think the MC of the "real world" thinks much more logically, doesn't throw themselves into things head first and is more calculating. Maybe something more like Satan?

Between the two of them, they are lax and playful, throwing inside jokes and playfully fighting. Ben [ Lucifer ] is like the "cool dad" that loves to mess around with his kids, which makes sense because he does have his own, they are fairly young and I can see MC babysitting in case it was needed. There's a deep trust between the two that can't really be described. Ben really wants MC to prosper in their career and will guide them- but he doesn't want to baby them either, he wants them to test the waters on their own. If they ever get overwhelmed he's there for them though.

His dumbass is forgetful to check his sugar as well, so you can catch MC helping to remind him to check it/eat/drink if needed. He didn't have the most welcoming background- he didn't have the support system a child needs, so he strives to be that and forgets to care for himself often.

"I want to give my kids everything I never had and more, just like how I want it for you too, MC."

Mammon / Avery

Avery [ Mammon ] is very business oriented and formal. MC and him would get along well, like their Obey Me counterparts, but just more lax and less chaotic. I see them as the type to go on coffee dates to catch up and get away from it all, seeing as how famous he is, he often likes to find smaller and less well known places to dwell. Enjoys the small and peaceful moments with MC and they can relate with being the most famous of the cast- so they often get treated the same.

I can see them having a deep platonic and familial connection while also being distant. Avery has trouble opening up due to being frequently used for his money, and though he and MC are on the same playing field, he has his moments where he needs to back away and recuperate. And though he is distant, if MC or himself were to ever need anything, they're at each other's beck and call. Think of the relationship as: MC is the younger sibling that was born like... 10 years after Avery and he is the older brother, they are distant at times, but still love each other deeply and fiercely.

"MC, what do you think of this new script- who is that on your page? They're liking too many pictures at once... a bit desperate- don't you think?"

Leviathan / Jackson

This one... is a little complicated. Really- he's a fuck boy and he doesn't care. I can see him as very... objectifying- and not just sexually either. He can see how to use someone to their fullest advantage, but only for his sake, just for to further himself or satisfy any needs he has. MC is a playful flirt, but once Jackson [ Leviathan ] starts to pull the moves, I can see MC pulling back quickly and isolating away from him. Until there is a serious moment where Jackson can prove that he can provide something meaningful to the relationship- it's going to remain cold and formal. MC isn't playing games.

This can be one of the few relationships that, if managed properly by MC and Jackson [ Leviathan ], can make their relationship to a more friends with benefits type or something romantic. Jackson [ Leviathan ] needs to learn how to stop seeing people as tools and more like... people. MC, in turn, would need to learn boundaries for themselves. They'd probably be so used to accepting people that keeping Jackson at a distance would be weird and almost foreign to them. If they both want things to work out for a proper, and healthy, relationship- it's going to be a lot of work.

"MC, come here, I need you for something. Hm? No, no- nothing like that. I thought maybe... we could just hang out? Normally?"

Satan / Ross

Honestly? MC could do better than Jackson [ Leviathan ] and Ross is it, babes. He is definitely the most understanding of MC and takes their own emotions into consideration. Wow kinda like Satan. He still does those live streams and gets smacked on a couple of grams, so MC is there either smoking as well or just getting hot boxed, their tiger dyed cats running everywhere. The live stream then turns into a kitten purring ASMR, then eventually, everyone is asleep on a live stream together. Ross [ Satan ], is a sweetheart as well, remembers the little things about MC and will make them special gifts or gestures for them. Is the type of boyfriend to leave random kisses on them just because.

Ross [ Satan ], also likes to talk, so he does like to pick MC's mind and see how they think- which in turn touches their heart because WOW. A guy they like isn't using them or being a general ass? He doesn't play around, so if you want a relationship prepare to be in something for the long haul, family affairs are now your business as well. He is super close with his younger brother Dmitri [ Luke ], so you need his approval as well. Ross also can help with building confidence and a stronger self image, but a major downside is that he is lazy, like, he is really fucking lazy. He's tired though, with his job, the animal shelters, watching his brother, and avoiding... them- he wants to just be a homebody. MC does a lot of home dates, but they end up very fulfilling because it's Ross, he knows how make make even the smallest moments feel like everything.

"Look at ya, MC! Damn, you always have me fallin' for ya all over again."

"I'm in sweatpants and a tanktop, babe, nothin' special."

"And you make 'em look fine as hell. Now come 'ere, let's watch a movie, look-! An MC sized space is here, right between my arms, neat right?"

Asmodeus / Micheal

He's like the best friend who acts like the wine mom. He's the wine mom. He's mom. Always come to him for help, from either something as small as a rant to larger issues like contracts and relationship advice. This a more platonic/familial relationship that MC would develop. They can delve into more personal and private conversations, confident Micheal has the best intentions and advice, and in turn MC helps him out with what their generation is up to these days.

Pinching MC's cheeks? Yeah, it's a ritual at this point. Likes to joke that MC is actually his illegitimate child. He also invites them to his vlogs, taking MC out at 2 am to Wendy's and talk about the most random stuff. Maybe hint at new things that are upcoming on the show. He writes TSL, not Alex [ Simeon ], so MC will help him with plot and point out any plot holes as well.

"MC, hon, take a nap. You're tired and haven't slept well. I got you food too- no, not Wendy's, actual food. Eat that and go sleep, alright?"

Beelzebub / James

This can be another contender for a romantic relationship! James [ Beelzebub ] is one of the few actors who is pretty similar to their character, so if you love Beelzebub, you love James, sorry I don't make the rules. It's law. He is still new to the acting scene, so unless MC was an actor as a child as well, they'd bounce tips off one another- things they learn from whoever takes them under their wings. In MC's case, Benjamin [ Lucifer ] is their mentor, and in James' case, Alex [ Simeon ] is his mentor.

He's very thoughtful, understanding, and compassionate. But, he is a bit of an airhead at times, or he often gets lost in his own head. This is due to him trying to think things through, he gets anxious and wants to perform well in every aspect of his life, so he tends to overthink and try to fix his problems in his head. MC will help him with opening up and stilling his mind into calmer waters. He feels the weight of his family, seeing as he now makes the most, he feels like he should be taking care of all of them- even when they tell him to just enjoy his life as it is. MC would realize he's a family man, so this would be another relationship where commitment is expected, James would rather not just have something casual due to how hectic things in his life get. He also is often with Dmitri [ Luke ], watching him and making sure he's okay, because if his younger siblings were in the same situation, he'd want someone to look out for them too. Dmitri is in love with both MC and James, often messing around or just relaxing with them of Ross [ Satan ] isn't around, so their often known as the "Realm Trio" due to their characters each being a different race.

"I'm fine, really! I was just... thinking, that's all. I'm happy, really I am, and I want everyone else to be as well. That's it."

Belphegor / Conner

MC definitely becomes more chaotic with Conner, he's a sweetheart, but damn can he not sit the fuck down. He can be a bit draining for MC if they aren't in the best of moods, and even then, he just holds this light that makes them happy or feel peaceful. Another romantic/platonic relationship that can happen. This is a relationship where no matter how old they get, what is going on in life, how overwhelmed they feel, MC and Conner [ Belphegor ] will always manage to laugh.

He is clumsy, especially with the tail, so MC will worry over him on and off set. He is very humble, and grateful for every opportunity he gets, so he faces each day with a smile and the classic southern hospitality- where you say thank you after everything, help anyone even if they aren't struggling, all with a southern drawl that makes MC melt. This is the healthiest relationship to exist, due to how easy Conner can communicate with MC and how MC can pick up on things he might not, there isn't any big issues because they both can just talk it out. Even if it doesn't end up romantic- it's still one of the most fulfilling relationships MC and Conner will have due to just being... them.

"It's so easy, being with you, and I love that. Loving you is never painful, never tough on me, it's always so... light. So perfect, like you."

Barbatos / Thomas

Oh my god. He is an absolute ass. He is like the uncle you never wanted, always sarcastic, roasting someone, but in the end he means no harm. MC and him definitely have a darker sense of humor together, getting either morbid or just downright weird, and no one else can decipher that the fuck they're saying because there's too many inside jokes and little intricacies. In the end, he is a ride or die, may not be the best to work with- but MC is now family and Thomas [ Barbatos ] will now kill for them. Congratulations on the achievement!

Will not allow MC to go to openings or any large events alone, and even if they have another cast member with them, he still keeps an eye on them. He gets anxious, and almost paranoid, his younger sister went missing years ago and never got closure. He see's MC not as his missing sister, but as someone who is in need of that older brother figure, and wants to take that role because it feels so natural. He still ends up as that cool asshole uncle, but he likes that too, as long as MC is with him. There are times where MC will need to help him through some issues, just by being a shoulder to lean on, and in turn they get closer. Thomas didn't expect to get close with many people on the cast, other than his old friends, and taking MC into his family was a surprised for all.

"Come here, ya annoying ass little kid, give me a hug! What! Come here or I'll chase you around his big ass house, MC!"

Diavolo / Roman

MC can be the romantic partner for Roman if you'd like, but I just remembered that I made him have triplets, so unless MC is his partner and willing to have kids, Roman would end up as another Uncle/Father figure. If you go the romantic route, Roman is so deeply in love with MC he will sometimes feel empty of he doesn't tell them he loves them everyday. He is attentive, watchful, and optimistic, always bringing fun into the relationship and making MC feel fulfilled and overflowing with love. But, now with the triplets? Love bomb x10, he loves MC with all his soul, he does, but now he realizes the kids come first and appreciates that they do the same. Prefers to be more private though, won't post whatever he does with the kids or anything like that, he doesn't want spotlights on his children when they never asked for it.

A more platonic/familial relationship though? Best. Man. Ever. Always taking MC out to eat and keeping up with their needs, doesn't baby them, just keeps a watchful and caring eye. Does this with all the younger cast as well. MC will feel loved, safe, and in harmony. He is a wine dad though, so MC will often bring him drinks so he can unwind, even make cocktails time to time just for practice and will make sure to give any tips he can. MC gets a little too tipsy at a party? Well, since he knows where the party is, shoot him a call and he'll pick his 6'5 ass up outta bed to bring MC either to their home or his.

"I've got you, always have, always will. I won't ever let you down, because you deserve the world and all the happiness in it, I just hope I can even be a little piece of it. A reason to make you happy."

Luke / Dmitri

MC is close with Dmitri no matter what, he's always on set, and MC can't seem to let him leave their sight. Kinda like a parent at the park. Won't exactly just stare at their kid, but will always know where they are, and make sure their within a safe distance. Hollywood is full of some sick fucks and MC will be damned if they'd let anything happen to Dmitri. He gets overwhelmed sometimes, will cry and shake, due to holding in stress from the public. MC will teach him how to cook, rather than bake, because food always brings people together and he wants his family to be together in any way he can do it.

Spending time with him means spending time with Ross [ Satan ], so MC ends up close with Ross anyway, and will often be filling up Dmitri's Instagram and other social medias. He is the younger brother MC never had and is ready to be another older sibling for him. If the show goes on for multiple seasons, then it will be set in stone, MC and Luke will be a found family along with the rest of the cast.

"Thank you for everything, MC. I love you, really, and I want you to be as happy as you can be! You're the best and more!"

Simeon / Alex

Alex [ Simeon ] is another potential love interest/ close friend. This is the only other relationship that can compete with Ross [ Satan ] and Roman [ Diavolo ]. He is known for his temper, but usually plays it up for comedy, and will never actually "blow up" on anyone that isn't deserving of it. He is a sweetheart, but has a tendency to be materialistic, due to his rich upbringing. He knows material things aren't the answer, but it's a habit/mentality he's working on fixing. He prefers to be more affectionate in private, because he wants to enjoy intimacy with MC without the eyes of the public on them, not because he would want to hide their relationship.

He is intelligent as fuck, so MC will be filled with the knowledge of the gods, always learning something new and living a student life that isn't more of a student- but someone that has a love for learning. You know Leonardo in Ikevamp? Yeah- that bitch. That's Alex. Even as a friend MC and Alex would always confuse people due to how close they are, which can be annoying if they are with another cast member, but in the end they know the truth.

"Ah fuck, MC, I'm trying to cook here, ya dork! Don't yank me around the kitchen! Hey! Loving me isn't an excuse to squeeze the life outta me! MC! Don't run now!"

Solomon / Derek

So, I honestly had Derek [ Solomon ] as the original love interest, going with the childhood friend trope. MC and Derek would be the ultimate set of goals, and living a fantasy life that most people dream of, the thing you'd see if those overly fluffy fan-fictions. Derek is the more caring and nurturing of the two, while MC is more outgoing and aggressive, and manage to find a happy medium between them. Derek has a calming aura around him and yet is the most socially awkward one in the cast- he will put Leviathan's character to shame with some of the things happened in the past. MC is the biggest tease and will have him flushing like a virgin school boy- and it isn't even sexual, he just flusters easily.

With Lovely and Blue, MC and Derek are known as the babysitters and pet sitters, and are often looking out for the casts pets and children whenever they need it. The couple everyone wants to end up like. You will never see them in scandals, drama, or anything of the sort- even if they become household names, Derek and MC prefer to keep the details of their lives lowkey. I can't see major issues in this relationship, romantic or platonic, because after knowing each other so long, they can communicate in their own ways.

"Blue, stay stiiiiiiiiill. Fine, leave. MC, come here, I need a pillow and Blue won't love me. Thank you- oh! Now you come, Blue? Jealous much?"

#obey me actor au #om actor au #obey me #obey me x reader #obey me imagines #obey me x you #obey me x mc

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tobesobri · 4 years

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𝓣here was an ask meme going around about what scene was the sole inspiration behind your entire story and someone asked me what that scene was for Only Human and well it’s in this chapter and I will let yall guess which one it is :)

If you’d like a preview of Chapter 12 right now, you can join my patreon here! All proceeds will be donated to BLM. Thank you so much for all the love and support with this story ❤️

huge massive thank you to the incredible @youresogolden-h for editing ❤️

CHAPTER ELEVEN: ALL MY LOVE (4.7K)

Harry and Y/N are friends…. with benefits, but not the kinds you’re thinking of.

🥥MASTERLIST 🌃INSPO TAG 🌻ASK TAG 💃PLAYLIST 🛌

If she thought she was miserable before, there was nothing quite like quitting Harry Styles. Especially when his concerned texts had stopped, and especially when she had to hear about him every night since she’d made her decision to never end up in his bed again. It became a regular thing that Will came home with news about Harry’s album and how things seemed to be going really well.

Without her, she thought. Things were going well now that he didn’t have her hanging onto him all the time like a little parasite.

Keeping her distance was hard, but she knew it would be better in the long run. Even if she had to have a few days of trouble getting out of bed. And crying herself to sleep again. She’d deal with it. It was better than living in a fantasy world with Harry.

Some of his things still took up space in her room. A grey hoodie from Randy’s Donuts, a pair of his socks. His house keys. The former she unfortunately found herself sleeping in once or twice. She hated herself for it, but she needed something. It was like switching to vapor to try and kick a smoking habit. Still not great, but not as bad as letting the addiction run its course.

She kept his keys in her nightstand, where they’d always been, but now they were just a bitter reminder of the last decent day they’d had with each other.

There were no regrets in her mind when she looked back on all of it. Maybe falling for Harry was a contender, but she wouldn’t take back any of their nights together if it meant she didn’t have to deal with her shattered heart. He’d helped her so much more than he even knew. He’d opened her up, showed her that not everyone’s hands had bad intentions. And most importantly, she learned to trust him, with her secrets, with her body, her entire life.

Two entire weeks had passed since she’d seen Harry and it only just began to hurt a little less. Still, Fridays and Saturdays were the hardest for her to get through because they’d been her favorite nights with Harry. By the third week, post-Harry, she had finally stopped thinking about him every hour until Will backpedaled all her progress at dinner on Tuesday night.

“I’m throwing Harry a surprise party at his house on Saturday.” He’d started, taking a bite of his chicken before continuing, “All of us in the studio with him put it together since he finally hit the halfway mark with writing. It’s not done but I know how hard it’s been for him so we felt like it was time to celebrate something, you know. Anyways,” he took another bite, “you’re all invited. Especially you.”

Will narrowed his eyes at Y/N, being the most aware roommate out of them all to know that she’d only been in a good mood a few days after the last party he took her to. She was back to hiding in her bedroom most days after that, so much that the past two weeks he wasn’t even sure if she was still alive at times. Something had clearly looked up when she finally joined them for breakfast and he was taking full advantage of it.

“I um… don’t think I can do another party at Harry’s.” She cringed, all the bitter memories of her last couple days with Harry flooding back.

Will sighed, recalling their conversation in the car the morning after. Maybe it wasn’t his best idea to invite her to another party Harry would be at, but if it would get her to do something besides work and hibernate, he’d take it. Besides, she said she didn’t like Harry that way and Will believed her. “It won’t be like last time.” He assured, “It’s mostly just people from the studio and his manager and stuff.”

She considered it. Maybe Harry would be too distracted with everyone else to pay her any attention. It didn’t take long, but she didn’t even want to try feeding Will excuses not to go. She wanted to see Harry again. And she hated herself for it, for not letting him go like she’d promised herself to do, and for stupidly being excited about seeing him again.

The ‘For Sale’ sign was still up in front of his house. Will talked her head off about it too, about the apartment Harry had shown him last week that he saw the ocean from.

She hated every second of it.

When they walked through the doors and she spotted how everyone else was dressed, she felt a wave of insecurities crash on her. Nobody was dressed as formal as she was, and maybe she wasn’t all that formal objectively, but she almost never wore dresses. Everyone was in jeans and polos or casual button-ups. A couple of women had on dresses too, but not quite like hers. They definitely didn’t wear heels either. She hated Will for not telling her she didn’t need to dress up, but, glancing over at him as they walked side by side into Harry’s kitchen, she realized she should have known better. He was also in jeans.

Some of them looked at her while she stood awkwardly beside Will, but luckily it wasn’t long after they had arrived that Harry was due back and the surprise part of his party got set into motion. There weren’t many people at his house, but they still hid everywhere they could, in his kitchen behind the island, crouched into corners together so that they weren’t visible from the front door. Everywhere it was physically possible to hide they did.

Except for Y/N. She didn’t want to see everyone happy for him. She didn’t want to know about how great his album was going to be or who he’d written his songs about. And she didn’t want to be among the faces of people he worked with, feeling so fucking out of place in her stupid fucking outfit she’d worn for stupid Harry who still didn’t fucking like her.

So she went someplace where she didn’t stick out like a sore thumb. The room that welcomed her like a warm and unconditionally loving hug. Where she felt a wave of relief. Where she felt safe, sitting in his armchair at the end of his bed, staring out over the city lights in a way she didn’t think she would ever again.

She had no clue if he’d ever come up here and find her and she wasn’t sure if she wanted him to. She just wanted to see the view one last time before it was gone forever.

The shouting from downstairs caught her attention because it was clear he had finally arrived. He could enjoy his night celebrating something huge for himself, even if it was only a small step in the making. She’d be out of his room before he found her in it anyways.

At least, that had been her plan. Just a little while longer and she’d leave. Spend the rest of her night stealing hopeless glances at him from across the room until she’d finally had enough and begged Will to take her home. That was the plan.

But it didn’t go as well in real life as it did in her head. Not when she heard footsteps coming up the stairs and she panicked. She stood before they got there, spinning around the room for someplace to hide but it was no use.

Harry stood in his doorway before she even got the chance to think of another plan. Instead, he caught her red-handed in the middle of his bedroom, alone.

“I, uh…” she pointed her thumb over her shoulder at his large window, “wanted to see--”

“The lights, yeah.” He nodded, finishing her sentence. She couldn’t help the hurt inside to see the smile stripped completely from his face the moment he’d laid eyes on her.

“What happened to you? You packed all your stuff and never answered my texts.” He took a step closer, his voice a little more commanding.

“I can’t do it anymore, Harry.” She mumbled, and he stopped walking towards her, completely taken aback by her words.

“Why not?” He breathed, feeling the heartbreak of the last few weeks without her all over again in his chest. He had even got so bad that after constantly turning down Will’s offers to hang out at the apartment, he nearly found himself begging Will to invite him over just to see her, but he knew that would have been a mistake. She needed her space and the way he’d felt about her after she told him to forget the kiss was more than enough to keep him away. He needed his space to stop being so mad at her.

But seeing her again, it all came flooding back.

She let out an exasperated laugh like he should know why. “You kissed me. And then?”

With his eyebrows furrowed, he came back at her twice as hard. “You told me to forget about it. So I did. Why are you mad at me for doing what you asked?”

He was right and there was no denying it. There was no more arguing with him about it. She dropped her shoulders and stared out the window again. “Can you please just tell me you did it because you were drunk? So I can move on.”

“Move on?” He snapped, his tone harsh enough to get her to look at him again, “You moved on from me the second I got home from New York, Y/N.”

She started to panic again, but this time there was no possibility of escaping. She had to face him, with or without tears in her eyes.

He continued while she was quiet. “I slept with her because I couldn’t sleep without you. I don’t understand how you’ve not realized that.” He continued.

“I don’t care who you sleep with, Harry.” She practically yelled at him and it took every inch of his self-control not to leap across the room when he realized she was crying.

“That’s the problem.” He deadpanned, keeping himself grounded instead of letting his emotions get the best of him like they always seemed to do.

“Harry!” Someone unfamiliar to Y/N shouted from downstairs, garnering both of their attention. “Hurry your ass up already!”

Pinching his bottom lip between his fingers, he turned back to face her, finding the tears that had spilled gone from her face like they’d never been there to begin with.

“I need to get dressed.” He explained and she quickly maneuvered herself out of his way. Not saying another single word to each other while she left his room and snuck back into the party she didn’t want to be at.

Glances were, in fact, shared between the both of them. Mostly because he wasn’t finished with her yet and in reality, neither was she with him. She could wallow in her self-pity all she wanted, telling herself Harry never liked her this or it was all in her head that. But she was fucking lost again without him the past couple weeks. Her only regrets now were leaving and she’d take it back in a heartbeat if she could. Just get over herself and be with him anyways because if she truly did not care who he slept with, she wouldn’t have let that stupid text message get the best of her.

She wouldn’t have spent every morning in the mirror telling herself she did not have a face Harry could ever love and bringing herself down for no fucking reason at all besides finding comfort in her own miserableness.

Hindsight is a bitch though.

The party died down sooner than his last one had, after they brought out a cake with a photo of Harry on it from long before Y/N knew him, possibly when he was sixteen or seventeen, she’d assumed, and then they proceeded to shove his twenty-five-year-old face in it and start a cake throwing war in the middle of his poor kitchen. That was when things died down. When some went home because they had children or were covered in cake and it was getting late, and others, who didn’t get absolutely pummeled by chocolate cake, stayed talking amongst themselves in his living room with empty glasses of champagne.

Y/N, on the other hand, was in an almost lifeless position beside Will on the bar stools at the island counter, barely listening while he and Harry and some others discussed stuff she knew nothing about all while Harry was still trying to get cake out of his hair.

She felt the agitating urge to clean up the rest of his kitchen, too, mostly because she couldn’t stand to look at it any longer. And maybe if she and Harry were on slightly better terms, she would be.

It was when Will’s phone rang that it finally got a lot quieter. There was still music playing softly in the background and chatter from others in a different room, but once Will took the call and left them all alone in the kitchen together, it was almost silent.

“You’re going to need to shower for like… forty minutes to get that all out,” Glenne teased. Y/N had learned she was Jeff’s girlfriend, and that Jeff was Harry’s manager. And she thought about how well all three of them knew each other and for how long while Glenne ran a strand of Harry’s messy hair between her fingertips to remove some stuck-on frosting.

“Forty minutes is a typical shower for him, try two days,” Jeff scoffed, poking fun at Harry’s expense.

“Heyyyy,” Harry grimaced, pretending to be offended as they both fucked with him, “stop taking the piss, I’m not in there that long.”

She hated that she agreed with Jeff. Harry did take long in the shower.

It felt weird, though, just watching them all interact, like she was someplace she wasn’t supposed to be. These were Harry’s friends and she was nobody to him, at least not publicly. And maybe not privately either. She had no clue how Harry felt about her, if he wasted any time even thinking about her at all anymore when she wasn’t around.

But then all eyes seemed to land on her. “Sorry, I forgot your name, um…” Glenne looked like she was reaching for something across the counter in front of Y/N while she tried mentally sifting through all the names she had to remember.

Harry answered before anyone could, however. “It’s Y/N. She’s… Will’s roommate.” Harry’s eyes went from Y/N, to Glenne, and finally landed on his manager. Giving him a look Y/N didn’t quite understand. Mostly because she was too focused on how cold he’d been talking about her, like she really didn’t mean a thing to him at all. She was just Will’s roommate to him. Even so, she couldn’t help feeling like it was more than she deserved from him.

“Y/N! Right! Can you hand me that phone right there?” She pointed to a discarded iPhone with a blue case that had been sitting in the same spot for quite a while, and Y/N returned it.

She didn’t say or do anything else after that, just slipped out of her chair, grabbed her purse and started walking away from them to find Will. She’d sufficiently had enough.

But when she reached the foyer, where she distinctly remembered Will running off too, he was nowhere to be found. She looked around for him a few moments more before pulling her phone from her purse to call him. Before she could, though, she noticed the text from him that had been sent five minutes prior.

(Will, 12:03 pm)

I’ll come back to pick you up. Sasha called, her mom’s in the hospital.

Her first reaction was shock, hoping that whatever was going on wasn’t too serious. And then she realized she was stuck at Harry’s after having already made her exit. She didn’t want to be mad though, Will had an emergency and it wasn’t like she hadn’t spent countless nights in Harry’s house before.

This was just one night she didn’t really want to spend here any longer.

And instead of waltzing herself back into the kitchen, she stepped outside for some fresh air. Or rather, she leaned into the doorway because it was far too cold to spend any length of time outside.

“Where’s Will?” Harry’s voice appeared from behind her and she twisted around quickly when he startled her.

“He had an emergency.” She slowly stepped back inside his house. “Said he’d be back to pick me up later.”

“Oh.” He paused, swallowing the nervous pit in his throat while whatever bottled up anger towards her that had been festering washed away. Seeing her standing there alone reminded him of every single one of her secrets she’d shared with him and even if he was mad, she didn’t deserve to be treated poorly by him. “You know you can stay here.”

She nodded, crossing her arms around herself and avoiding his eyes.

“I want you to stay.” He added once he got closer to her and her breath caught in her throat. He wanted her. Those words and the sweet smell of chocolate cake in his hair and just… him being near her again like this was enough to make her dizzy.

She thought about saying a million things to him, but settled on something that was classically her instead. “And I want you to take a shower.”

It was possibly the first time in weeks that she’d seen his smile. A genuine, dimply, toothy, Harry smile that made her hate all the time she spent missing out on it.

“Don’t go anywhere.” He pointed his index finger at her and she nodded just before he ran upstairs, taking them two at a time.

She didn’t like his house as much with all the people in it she didn't know. Not a single face she recognized as they littered all the places she and Harry had once been. The middle of his living room where they danced together. His kitchen where he’d given her a glass of water the first night they slept together. His couch where he’d given her the keys to his house.

Sighing, she found a spot where she could be by herself and texted Will back not to worry about her, that Harry was letting her sleep on the couch. Stretching the truth was something she did well when it came to Harry after all.

More people left, being seen out by Jeff and Glenne instead of Harry until what few people remained lingered on the sofas around her, drinking the last bits of wine he had left to offer and watching the logs burn out slowly in his fireplace.

Jeff plopped himself down beside Y/N and Glenne next to him, and while she was wrapped up in a conversation, he leaned slightly towards Y/N, keeping his voice down.

“Harry told me about you, you know.”

She looked up from her phone, a bit frozen in place as she slowly craned her neck over to him. He looked at her with a reassuring smile even though she was terrified to death. What exactly did Harry’s manager know about her?

“He’s been a pain in the ass recently thanks to you.”

“What?”

Before Jeff could explain anything, Harry was making his boisterous entrance back into what was left of the party. All cleaned up this time though with fresh clothes on and dampened hair. He looked like he’d just been working out with water leaving a sweat-like appearance on his forehead and what could be seen of his chest. He was still just as hot coming out of the shower and she mentally smacked herself for thinking it.

“Not saying that you all have to go home, but you do have to get the hell out of my house now.” They all laughed at him for a short while until everyone who had lingered to say their personal goodbyes and final congratulations to Harry started trickling off as he walked them all to his door. Jeff and Glenne were the last to go, but eventually she was alone again.

And she stayed on her phone until she heard his front door close and the familiar sounds of him pressing the code into his security system keypad. Her stomach did all sorts of twists from somersaults to cartwheels knowing it was just the two of them alone again. Knowing he was closing up his house while she was still in it. That she wasn’t going home tonight as planned after all.

“Are you sleeping in here?” He asked once he’d reached the open entrance to the living room, hovering his hand over the control panel, waiting for her before he shut off all the lights.

She pulled herself up from the couch after taking a deep breath. They were doing this again. And she knew damn well whether or not anything had happened with Will that she was going to end up in his bed somehow anyways. He followed her up the stairs and into his room again, lifting his fingers to graze her arm and get her to stop once they were smack dab in the middle of it.

When she turned to see what he was doing, his entire mood had shifted. He wasn't fun, bubbly Harry right now. He stared at her the way he had before he kissed her, except this time they were both completely sober. And maybe that’s why she let him take one step closer. She let him reach his hands around her back and carefully pull the zipper of her dress down.

“You still clean up nice,” he whispered, sending goosebumps all across her skin, “but you look even better in my shirts.”

Without even thinking, he pulled the shirt he currently wore off and over his head, handing it to her like a peace offering. But he just hoped she still needed him enough for at least one more night of their bullshit. He hoped she wanted him too, as much as he wanted her and he hoped that this wouldn’t even come close to being their last night.

They stared at each other while she switched outfits, his eyes never wavering from hers while she changed. Not that he didn’t want to look, but that he didn’t expect her to do it all right there in front of him like she had never done before.

“Better?” She asked once clothed again, her dress in a familiar pile on his floor.

He just nodded, slowly, and like he was in some kind of trance, especially when she turned on her heel and went straight for his bed. Getting in under the covers on her normal side and patting the empty space next to her for him to join.

Swallowing thickly, he slipped in beside her. Just like old times.

She turned on her side, facing her back to him and scooting herself right up against his front, grabbing his wrist to pull his arm over her and his body closer. All the cold words they had exchanged earlier in the night melting right away.

They got used to each other again, folding arms around each other so that there was no telling where Harry ended and Y/N began. He breathed in the beachy scent of her hair and she felt his heart beating against her spine. The three weeks she thought she could quit Harry were a total waste when they fit together just the way they always had. Like puzzle pieces who needed each other to finish the bigger picture.

Harry shifted slightly behind her and she felt the brush of his lips at her ear.

“You know the songs are about you, right?” He spoke softly, forcing her eyes to shoot open. And when he did it again, he said something that truly made her heart burst into a million tiny pieces of rainbow colored confetti. “Know you’re the one I’ve been in love with all along, don’t you?”

She twisted her head around to face him, to meet him a lot closer than they’d been since his last party. To look into his eyes and make sure he was being serious. And when she felt his heart pounding against her upper arm and his eyes steady as ever, she knew he wasn’t fucking around.

All he had to do was take one glance at her lips for her to twist herself just the tiniest bit further and mend them both back together again. This time there was no alcohol, there was no doubt or self-pity. No rock between them.

She slid her hand up his neck to his jaw, pulling him in while she arched her back against him to reach his lips properly. His own hand found a home at the side of her face as well, rubbing gentle strokes across her cheek as they finished where they left off all those nights ago.

Except this time, he had actually said what he needed to say to her before it was too late.

She felt him start to pull her onto him, as slowly as he possibly could. He gauged every one of her reactions just to make sure he never pushed her too far. And when she was half on top of him with her leg wrapped around his and one of his hands on her waist, things got a little deeper.

She held his face in both her hands, breathing heavily every time she got the chance to before going right back in for more. And his lungs burned too, moaning against her lips every time he lost his breath.

This time when she pulled away, it wasn’t to apologize or give him a look like she regretted it. Instead, she laughed and let him get some oxygen back into his system.

He had her again not even seconds later, though, and she was too wrapped up in it to even care about anything else. She’d save it all for the morning. Right now all she wanted was his lips and his hands on her lower back, wrinkling the fabric of her shirt in his hold so much that he exposed her pale pink underwear beneath the covers. She didn’t really care about that either.

What she did care about, however, was when he snuck a hand up underneath the back of her shirt, feeling his fingertips on her bare skin there for the first time ever. And instead of feeling scared, she opened her eyes slightly and saw him. That it was Harry she’d learned to trust. To touch her, to hold onto her secrets, and keep them safe. And he made everything so much better than it already was.

She explored his body a little bit more too, grazing her hand over his chest while he kissed her harder. Feeling his heartbeat in her palm and then his biceps tensing beneath his skin.

She let him undo the clasp of her bra, both hands around her back to get it off within a second, even while he was distracted. He knew she didn’t sleep in it, so he was only doing her a favor. Because now was not the right time to do anything he wanted to. There were still a lot of unsaid words and he really couldn’t keep his eyes open much longer anyways.

They separated again when she pulled away to remove the straps and throw the thing off the side of the bed while he grinned at her.

Coming back to him, he caught her face in his hand before she violated his lips any further. “I could kiss you all night, but I’m genuinely exhausted,” he whispered sleepily.

She shook her head at him, “And people say I’m the lightweight.” Scoffing, she instead settled into his side, resting against his chest in her familiar spot and watched his chest move up and down rapidly until he eventually caught his breath and fell asleep.

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#harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles writing #onlyhuman

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syms-things-5 · 3 years

Text

Clear The Area - Chapter Eighteen

Previous Chapter Here

Notes: So sorry this took me an age to get out. Thanks for sticking with me. We’re in the end game now...

Warnings: Heavy language. Angst.

Tags: @jennmurawski13 @kelbabyblue

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

Sarah was trying her hardest to get out of Lisa’s birthday weekend. Really trying. She couldn’t remember the last time she had put this much effort into something that wasn’t related to work or getting to a finish line she’d imposed upon herself while out on a run.

She wasn’t a very creative person either. Not when it counted. She spent three days pathetically dropping hints that she was coming down with something. Scott dismissed it at first, insisting the fresh air would do her some good. She went as far as to suggest she was feeling quite nauseous so perhaps a five-hour-plus car journey might not be the best idea. Only she had downplayed it to such an extent, she inadvertently removed the problem from the table.

She also tried the whole “it should be a family event” thing, but Shanna told her she was family and that she should stop mithering and start packing.

Things got a little desperate. She wasn’t proud of herself but when Audrey had told her about a falling-out she’d had with Michael, well, it would be stupid to lose that golden opportunity. So, she told Shanna she was thinking of offering to stay and support her dear, dear friend and colleague but, with a glint in her eye, Audrey insisted it wasn’t that big of a problem. She was definitely off Sarah’s Christmas card list now.

Truth be told, she didn’t have a legitimate reason to avoid the break. She couldn’t deny the prospect of having the entire apartment to herself for four days was enticing, though. She could enjoy some rare peace and quiet. She could read a book in a long, hot bubble bath without Shanna perching by the side and regaling her with the latest issues in her romantic life. She could cook and eat seafood without worrying about giving her best friend an allergic reaction. She could also lounge around in her pyjamas all day, or maybe even naked.

No, not naked. She was never one for that idea.

Carly had been filling the family WhatsApp with game ideas; some solo, some in teams. All kid-friendly, which was a speciality of the Evans’ clan. Lisa had planned a long hike for the Sunday morning followed by what sounded like an extravagant picnic with champagne, quiche and foot-long subs. She also sent a picture of three humongous bags of marshmallows, the size of small children, and suggested they could sit round a camp fire on the evening they arrive. That was assigned to Chris as his first job.

There was also the small issue of a massive hot tub. Thanks to a new reliance on fast food during her late shifts, Sarah wasn’t much a fan of her body at the present time. That was another thing she’d have to contend with. She loved the family but forced fun in bathing suits was not really her “thing”.

“If we get there early, we can bagsy the attic room.” Shanna suggested, nose in a gossip magazine. Sarah nodded in agreement while keeping her eyes on the television. “I’ll be damned if Scott gets it all to himself again.”

“Sure thing.” Sarah replied, acting nonchalant and biding her time once more before she could raise again the possibility of her not going with them.

“Don’t get anything out for dinner tonight. We’re heading to mom’s in a couple of hours. I hope that’s OK.”

“Sure. Wait, what?” Sarah did a double take at Shanna, her face now fully hidden by her magazine.

“Sorry!” She peaked out over the top of the page. “I forgot to say earlier but Mom wanted to have dinner at hers tonight so we can go through the itinerary in full. Make sure everyone knows what they’re bringing. I said it’d be cool ‘cos you weren’t working.” Her tone was apologetic. “You’re not doing anything, are you?”

No, she wasn’t doing anything. And she couldn’t think of anything either. There was literally no thoughts running through her mind at that time. None that offered her any help whatsoever. Blank. Stupid, fucking, dumbass.

“Yeh, no, of course. Makes sense.” She responded after a second had passed. She silently blew out a long breath and sank further into the couch.

When Shanna had said they were having dinner, Sarah figured it would be one of Lisa’s massive pot pies followed by the biggest tub of Neapolitan ice cream she could find. Something easy and comfortable that wouldn’t get in the way of the more pressing matters at hand, namely finalising plans for her birthday weekend. She was most certainly not expecting candles and a table runner, the fancy anniversary cutlery and four or five bottles of expensive red wine. Lisa had even added some fresh flowers as a centrepiece.

Sarah looked down at her ripped black jeans and grey t-shirt and felt woefully under-dressed. She scolded Shanna with an annoyed look that didn’t go unnoticed.

“I didn’t know she was planning some fancy thing, did I?!” Shanna whispered as they hung up their jackets in the hallway. “You know what she’s like.”

Sarah did know what she was like so, really, she should have known better.

Shanna nudged her out of the way to walk into the kitchen and give her mother a hug, leaving Sarah standing in the doorway feeling like a potato and not sure how to make use of herself. She could hear Scott get beaten loudly by Carly’s husband on a computer game. She glanced her head inside the living room and waved at them, watching as they offered muffled sounds as acknowledgement of her greeting. Chris didn’t seem to be anywhere around yet which gave her some mild comfort at least. In fact, nearly a whole hour went by before he arrived. A light, summer shower had started outside and his arrival was announced to all by Lisa’s shrill tone instructing him to take his shoes off before walking on her newly shampooed carpet.

“Yeh, ma, I got it. Gimme a break…”

“Did you bring that picnic blanket I asked you to find? The one you brought last year? The large, tartan one?”

Chris gave his mother a confused look before she audibly sighed. “I asked you about it yesterday? I texted you earlier to remind you? Jesus….”

He shrugged off his sport jacket, placing it on top of Sarah’s, and toed his boots off before ambling into the dining room to join the others.

“She’s on one again.” Scott whispered to him as Chris took a seat beside him, across from Sarah and Shanna. “She called me three times this morning alone to remind me to pick up plastic cups and plates. Like I’m gonna forget something she’s messaged me about, like, a hundred times.”

“That’s nothing. You should see the list of jobs she’s given to Miles and Ethan.” Michael joined in.

“But they’re only kids.” Scott questioned him, half surprised and half...not so surprised. His memory suddenly recalled all kinds of jobs he was forced to do as a young boy, raking lawns and cleaning the family car. Michael just shrugged back at him, rolling his eyes knowingly. Scott looked between Shanna and Sarah, worrying for what she’ll impose upon them all next.

“She hasn’t given me any jobs yet.” Shanna said. She almost sounded offended at being left out of the menial work. The room fell silent as everyone else slyly eyed each other. “Oh, right. Thanks guys.”

“Hey, your job is to read the maps so we get there in one piece.” Scott finally broke the awkward silence.

“And Sarah? What’s Sarah’s job? I don’t think she’s been asked to do anything either.”

“Her job is to make sure you’re reading the map the right way around.” Chris interrupted and the room descended into fits of laughter. Shanna merely leaned back in her chair, folded her arms and cast a mental curse on her older brother. Sarah tried hard to mask a smirk that didn’t go unseen by Chris.

��Pointedly ignoring his sister, Chris reached for the open bottle of wine closest to him. He leaned his arm across the table and offered Sarah a glass. “Want a top-up?”

They made eye contact for the first time in what felt like ages and he smiled at her, a slight crease appearing in the corners of his eyes so she knew it was genuine. “No, I’m OK. Better pace myself.”

They hadn’t seen each other, hadn’t messaged each other, in over a week. She was grateful for the break. He looked good, though. Lean and sculpted to a point that was inhuman or, at the very least, unfair to an average human being. A couple of weeks of working out and his body seemed to ping back to what it once was. It was like watching elastic snap into place. Sarah suddenly felt every single extra pound clinging to her thighs. Whenever she gained weight, it always seemed to land there. It was annoying and proved nearly impossible to remove no matter how often she ran.

“The hell is this?” Chris asked. He finally noticed the smooth table runner stretching out in front of him. “Are we expecting someone official?”

“Just keep quiet and let her do her thing.” Scott pleaded with him quietly before connecting eyes with Shanna and Sarah, everyone seemingly thinking the same thing. “Let’s try to get out of here in one piece, yeh?”

“What took you so long to get here, Chris?” Lisa asked as she walked back into the dining room carrying a large tray of what looked like bread rolls. She placed it down in the centre before moving to the side table to gather the salt and pepper grinders.

“Oh, it was just a work call.” He shrugged, confident enough in his manner that the conversation didn’t go any further. Scott elbowed him seemingly without anyone else noticing but Chris brushed him off with a shake of his head. He rested his chin on his hand as he took stock of what was in front of him, Sarah included.

His beard was thicker and apparently untended to, Sarah noticed, now that things had quietened down. He glanced at her through his lashes as things grew quiet and Lisa started dishing out vegetables to everyone. Lisa had a particular way of handling large family dinners – lessons learned from cooking for many kids over the years. You knew to wait until everyone had something on their plate before making moves for any more. It all smelled delicious. As unnerved as Sarah felt with the formality laid out in front of her, she had to admit she was looking forward to some proper home-cooked food.

Chris kept looking at Sarah, hands folded in her lap, polite as always, waiting for everyone else to go in front of her. He saw Michael help himself to three bread rolls before passing the plate back round to Lisa. Michael was a tall, hefty man whose appetite never seemed to be affected by anything. Even when he had horrendous flu that left him in bed for a fortnight, he still managed to put a lot away. He had never once experienced food poisoning.

“If you’re waiting for everyone else, there’ll be nothing left.” Chris spoke as he leaned in towards her so she could hear him over the sounds of cutlery and enjoyment. “Just go for it.”

She smiled shyly back at him and thanked Lisa for cooking what appeared to be a mini-feast.

“Can you pass the butter, please?” Shanna asked as she reached her arm over Sarah’s plate, forcing Sarah to lean back in her chair. She stretched her other arm out for the gravy that Scott was currently pouring over his plate.

“You’re always so polite.” Chris chuckled. “Shan, can you stop getting in the way and let the poor girl eat.”

“Huh?” Shanna questioned, unaware of what was going on.

“You’re getting in her way.”

“No, she’s fine. It’s fine.” Sarah quickly interrupted as she sensed him bristle with frustration.

He looked at her for another second before shaking his head. Shanna threw her brother a look of puzzlement but Scott appeared just as confused by his sudden tone.

“Bet this beats McDonald’s, eh Sarah?” Carly said, before giggling to herself.

“You’re telling me. I can’t remember the last time I ate something green and fresh.”

“Michael is so jealous.”

Michael’s ears perked up as he turned to his wife and Sarah. “Damn straight. Being only able to eat burgers and fries is, like, the dream scenario.”

“Why have you been on so many night shifts lately anyway?” Chris asked, a mouth full of chicken, placing the spotlight firmly on her.

She tried to shrug it off, act casually. “Audrey needed some extra support and I figured it would do me good to work in a few more nights. I always seem to manage to get out of them.”

She was fast hoping Lisa would start discussing the impending trip to distract everyone but no such luck.

This felt like it was going to be a long night.

“It gave you time off for this weekend so swings and roundabouts, eh?” Shanna added. “Speaking of which, is there anything you need us to do for the trip, Mom? I noticed everyone else has jobs and lists except for us.” Shanna inquired, not quite able to hide the mild accusatorial tone creeping into her words.

“Um, no, I don’t think so, honey. Just trying to keep it as casual as possible.”

Scott nearly choked out a chunk of potato. Chris, side-eyeing Michael’s increasingly red face, tried his hardest not to bark out in laughter. It was tough. Lisa noticed it, too. Choosing to ignore it, she turned back to her daughter.

“I meant that things are under control now so there’s no need to add to the pile. As long as you get there on time, that’s all I’ll ask for.”

Shanna wasn’t feeling convinced and the smug grin now on Chris’ face wasn’t helping to reassure her either. She turned to Sarah to see if she was thinking the same thing as her but Sarah just kept her eyes on the plate of food in front her, hoping that if she continued eating and finished as quickly as possible, she could get home again.

“I can do something, Mom.” She protested. “I could bring that lawn bowling game again?”

“Actually, Michael has one of those. It’s a bit newer and the skittles are heavier so the wind won’t keep knocking them over.” Carly spoke up before glancing apologetically at her sister. “He just got it from a friend at work, so… No biggie.”

“What about wine and drinks? We could stop off on the way up?”

“I put an order in for all of that.” Lisa responded with a casual wave of her hand. “It’ll be here the day before so I’ll pack it up here before we set off. Speaking of which, anyone for more wine?”

Shanna remained quiet as the family conversed about nothing in particular. Carly was talking about some game the kids at school had taught her that might be fun for the weekend but nothing could remove the unease surrounding her sister. Sure, Shanna wasn’t the most reliable when it came to shopping lists and sticking to plans but it was unlike Lisa not to call upon her for something, no matter how small and inconsequential it might be.

Attention turned from one brother to the next as discussions about carpooling took over. Chris really wanted to use the trip as an excuse to take his new Audi for a drive but with all the gear he and Scott had to bring, there wasn’t much room for anything or anyone else.

“Except maybe Sarah?” Chris posed the question, keeping it casual. “You could tag along with us and then Shanna could go with mom, I guess.”

“I was thinking of hiring a car myself actually.” Chris looked surprised at Sarah’s sudden offer. She hated driving. “We could take some of the load off everyone else then. Lisa? We could pack up some of your stuff?”

Sarah had loosely discussed this with Shanna some time ago but they had ultimately decided against it because, well, she really hated driving. Now, however, sensing her friend’s growing despondency, she figured it might help her feel more useful. Plus, it would give Sarah some control over when they could head back home again.

Shanna looked at her friend and smiled gratefully.

“That’s very kind of you, Sarah. I supposed you both could go on ahead and get the keys from Maggie and we could meet you there soon after? I said we would be getting there some time around the early afternoon if that’s alright with you both?” Lisa requested, opening another bottle of wine. Shanna nodded, a smile wide on her face now and she felt a sense of relief.

Sarah mentally calculated backwards from “early afternoon” and reasoned they would need to be up and out of the apartment by 7am at the latest. Suddenly, her role in proceedings made more sense where Shanna was concerned. She gladly accepted a new glass of wine and made a mental note to contact the car rental in the morning.

“You know who you should ask about renting cars?” Scott asked. “Greg, of course! I bet he knows a guy who knows a guy who is the son of the guy that started Mercedes. Or something. Either that or he probably has shares in Hertz.”

Sarah rolled her eyes at him, laughing. He probably wasn’t wrong.

“OK there, brother. You need to ease up on the wine” Chris pushed Scott’s glass further away and patted him on the back. “There you go, little sis. Looks like you have a job after all.”

A clear sign of Chris’ irritation was when he chose to be patronising. Shanna was taken aback by his tone and Sarah felt her friend sink back into her chair, irritated. Sarah raised her eyebrow at him but all he did was shrug, playing innocent. Not his strong point.

The room stayed silent for a little while as people finished up their meals. As much as she originally wanted to pace herself, Sarah didn’t object when Scott filled her glass up yet again. He turned in his chair to place the empty bottle on the side table alongside the others. It was then that Sarah noticed all of the other empties. Had they really drunk that much? In little more than an hour? She clocked the time and there still seemed to be plenty of food left. They would be travelling much of it home as afters at this rate. Chris left the room briefly and returned with a couple of beers for him and Michael.

“What are you gonna do with all this left-over food, ma?” Chris asked as he sat back down indicating a second tray of roast potatoes that had so far gone untouched.

“Please don’t let us take any.” Sarah joked, holding her hands up in playful protest.

“What?” Scott asked before laughing. He looked at his sister before smiling broadly at Sarah as he watched her cheeks blush red.

“Oh, she’s feeling self-conscious about her weight.” Shanna answered, nudging her under the table. That was helpful of her, thought Sarah. She could feel herself heating up as they all looked at her, waiting for her to speak up again. Chris took a swig of beer from his bottle and leaned his forearm on the table.

“No way in hell are you fat, Sarah. That’s ridiculous.” Scott combatted. “You’re really trim, being on your feet all day. I’d love to give you my fit-bit some time. I’d probably gain a few thousand steps.”

Sarah laughed out loud. “Thank you, Scott. Can we please change the subject?”

“So, you’ll be wearing a two-piece, yeh?” Chris asked. She turned to look at him suddenly before chuckling nervously.

“Um, I have no idea yet. Are we even going to use the hot tub?”

“I won’t be.” Lisa laughed.

“Oh, we all definitely will! It’s the height of summer and that thing can fit a dozen people. Ample room for comfort!” Scott enthused. He should be a salesman.

“And it’d be a real shame if you didn’t join in, Bernette.”

She felt her skin heat up under Chris’ gaze as he attempted to hide the fact he was looking at her by taking another long swig from his beer bottle. “I’m not apologising for that by the way. As a man and your friend, I can say that and you can’t get mad at me.”

“What?” Scott asked. It was a valid question in the circumstances. “What a…weird thing to say.” Scott laughed a little uncomfortably but Chris didn’t break eye contact with Sarah.

“So,” Michael attempted to add some humour back into the room. “Bet it’s nice sleeping during the daytime now you’re on lates? I used to love lazing around the house when I did them.”

Scott nodded enthusiastically in agreement, slapping his hand on the table. “I remember night shoots on this one TV drama I did a few years ago and honestly, the sleep I got the next day was the best ever. I don’t know why but I always tend to sleep better in the daytime.”

“Funny, that’s what your teachers used to say.” Chris joked, swigging his beer. Lisa giggled and fondly touched her son’s elbow.

“Oh ha ha ha. You’re so funny. I swear if you’re this amusing this weekend, I might not survive my sides splitting open.” Scott rolled his eyes. “Which reminds me, we should figure out rooms now so there’s no fighting on the day. No way am I sharing with this idiot.”

“You only wanna do that ‘cos you know we’ll be there first and we will be bagsying the attic this time.” Shanna thumbed the space between her and Sarah.

“You don’t deserve the attic.” Chris pointed. “You’ll be half-cut the entire weekend, like last time. You won’t enjoy the space or the views.”

“Excuse me? What do you care?” Shanna retorted.

“You spent a whole day in bed with a hangover last time. If you’re gonna be sharing with Sarah, it’s not fair on her to have to look after you. Again. It’ll spoil her weekend as well.” He explained. “She deserves a break just as much as you do.”

Shanna looked aghast at her friend before regarding her brother again. She shook her head in disbelief. “I can handle my drink, OK? I was just gonna say that it wouldn’t be fair if Scott got that room all to himself. Especially if he’s on his own again.”

“Thanks sis.”

“Sorry, Scott. But…y’know. If anything, Mom should have it.” She suggested, looking towards her mother in hopes that she might appreciate the offer.

“Thanks sweetie but I’ll be staying in the guest house this time. With Carly, Mikey and the kids.”

“Since when?” Chris asked, surprised.

“We just figured it would be easier this time around. Plus, I can help with the kids and you guys can sort breakfast for us all. Get your pancake apron out again, hun.” She winked at him, sipping her wine.

“Chris is a great tosser.” Shanna said under her breath.

“Shanna….” Lisa nudged her.

“Wait, so does this mean we get a room each then?” Scott interrupted. He wasn’t even sure of what he was saying as the wine haze gradually descended over him. “Sarah?”

“I have absolutely no idea.”

“I’ve lost track of what’s going on now.” Scott said.

“That doesn’t answer the question of who gets the attic, though?” Shanna asked, a little whinier than she had intended.

“If Sarah and I take the downstairs rooms, we can figure out breakfast in the mornings.” Chris suggested. “And you can have your precious attic. That makes it easier, right? Does that make you happy, Shanna? Good.”

“What’s crawled up your ass and died this evening?” Shanna asked, irritated.

“Oh my god, Shanna, it’s a fucking bedroom.” He practically spitted. “You keep dragging everything out and making everything into a bigger deal than it needs to be.”

“No, I’m not!”

“Yes, you are! I’m just making the decisions so we can all move the fuck on.”

“Chris!” Lisa reprimanded her son and regretted over-ordering on the wine.

“It’s alright now.” Sarah attempted to calm things down. “I think we’ve pretty much figured it out so it’ll be fine.” Carly nodded and nudged Michael to offer something by way of support but he looked just as baffled by the tension as she did.

Chris landed his bottle on the table hard. “Sarah, you don’t need to keep standing up for her. She’s a big girl. She should be able to figure it out now without you babysitting her all the goddamn time.”

“What?!” Shanna also slammed her glass down on the table and looked to Scott and Carly for some back-up but they both seemed frozen to their respective spots. “I don’t need babysitting.”

“OK, guys. Dessert? I have pecan pie and or ice cream?” Lisa offered, standing up from her seat and making a shade more noise than necessary in the hope it might snap the kids out of whatever funk they were in.

Chris glared at his sister a beat too long and she returned the favour before turning away with a look of disgust. “You’re gonna be heaps of fun this weekend, I can tell.” Shanna shrugged. “Clearly, I’m not the one we need to be concerned with. Maybe it’s you that needs babysitting?”

“Fuck you!” Chris stressed, just low enough to miss his mother’s ears.

Carly’s eyes grew wide in shock and for a second, Chris looked like he might apologise. Sarah reached a hand under the table to gently tap Shanna on her leg. Shanna felt it but didn’t acknowledge it. Instead, she leant on her elbow and rubbed her earlobe between her thumb and forefinger, a sure sign she was feeling upset and possibly trying to stop tears forming. Sarah tried to get Chris’ gaze back on her but he continued eying his sister, no apology yet materialising. He was a loose cannon when he was in this mood and she didn’t much want to stick around and find out what might happen if he downed another beer.

“We should probably think about heading home, Shan. I’ll check for an Uber.” Sarah stated.

“Don’t do that, I’ll give you a lift, hun. It won’t take long. We can have some pie and then go if you like.” Carly offered with a wink and for the first time that evening, Sarah noticed she hadn’t been drinking.

“Always looking out for you, aren’t we?” Chris said, lowly.

“Do you wanna calm down?” Shanna asked.

“I am calm.” Chris replied. “I’m just having a nice time, right? That’s what we’re all doing here, yeh? Sarah?”

“Sorry?”

“Are you having a good time?” He pressed.

She was sure he was leading her into a trap.

“I am OK. Sure.” She spoke each syllable carefully, trying to warn him off from whatever his motive was.

“I don’t believe you.”

She couldn’t bring herself to look at him, or anyone. She held her hands in her lap and paid attention to the air she was now breathing in deeply.

“Oh Jesus Christ!” Shanna called out. She was growing more and more frustrated with her brother by the second.

“Shanna!” intercepted Lisa.

“No! He’s being a dick and I wanna know why!” She turned back to Chris. “What the hell have I done to piss you off?!”

He stayed quiet, blocking her voice out. He focussed as much of his energy as he could at Sarah sitting across from him, willing her to look back at him, to let him know it was going to be OK. He swung between feeling regret and feeling practically and absurdly confident. It was the beer obviously. It really felt like a now-or-never moment. Fuck it.

“I’m sorry, Sarah.”

Sarah finally looked up at him, tears appearing in the corners of her eyes. Her feet felt like they were weighed down with concrete to the spot underneath. She tried to feel them, to grab at the carpet between her toes. She was pretty sure she could no longer hear what was going on around her as she felt her heart beat inside her ears.

“Why are you apologising to her? I’m the one that’s upset!” countered Shanna, jabbing her finger at him, aggressively.

He shook his head before looking back at his sister. “I’m sorry, Shanna. I wish there was a better way of saying this but I guess not. I’m just…”

He paused as he tried to find the words. Sarah felt her heart sink. What felt like goosebumps suddenly appeared up and down her arms. Chris looked at her again. Scott looked at her, too, picking up on something for the first time but what, he couldn’t work out. Damn that second bottle.

“I’m just tired.” Chris offered. Carly looked to Michael but he knew nothing of what was happening. “Of this.”

“Is it work again?” Lisa enquired. “Maybe you could work in some time off this time around, so you’re not away from home for as long.”

“No, it’s not work, ma. I’m just tired in general. Of a lot of things. People.” He pronounced each syllable as clearly as he possibly could. “And I know it sounds pathetic and you’re probably thinking I’m being selfish but I really don’t fucking care.”

“I…I don’t understand, honey.”

“Yeh, what are you talking about?” Shanna turned to her friend but her stare wasn’t quite matched by Sarah who looked like she was waiting for the ground to swallow her whole. “Does anyone know what the hell he’s talking about? Or why I am in the firing line for it all of a sudden?”

“Shan, I don’t think-” Scott started but the glare from his sister stopped him in his tracks. Scott looked at Sarah and things started falling into place. For some reason, of all the memories to have at that moment in time, his mind flashed back to standing out on his brother’s terrace on the evening of his birthday party. Chris had been distracted and checking his phone, even more than usual so Scott was certain it had something to do with a girl. Normally, he’d feel a sense of pride at being right but it didn’t feel altogether appropriate in the current circumstances.

“What the hell is going on?” Shanna pressed. She looked to Scott who had his gaze fixed firmly on his brother. “Do you know, Scott?”

Scott looked to his brother and when Chris met his gaze, he knew. He knew Scott knew, too. Call it brotherly intuition but something had connected for him and Chris was all the more grateful for it.

“Do you ever feel tired or dictating everyone else’s happiness?” Chris asked, breaking the silence.

Shanna dropped her hands on her lap in frustration. “What the hell is that supposed to mean? When have I ever dictated your happiness?”

“Do you even realise what people do for you? Do you ever take notice of everyone around you, going out of their way to make you feel better even if it makes them feel worse? Take tonight for example. Sarah doesn’t even wanna drive this weekend. She fuckin’ hates it, you know this, but she’s doing it anyway so that you can feel useful. It’s pathetic.”

“What? You heard her, she just offered.”

“Because you’ve been moaning about not having anything to do! If you’d just moved on, shut up, she probably wouldn’t have needed to.”

“That’s not true. You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Shanna dismissed him.

“Why don’t I get the car running and you guys can meet me outside in 5?” Carly proposed, indicating to Sarah that she should try and gather her things, Shanna included.

Chris completely ignored Carly. “And you’ve asked her what she wants, right?”

“Chris, please…” It was pathetic. Sarah knew that.

“I just don’t get it, Sarah.” He turned to her with a half-hearted shrug. “I’ve thought about it all week but I just don’t understand what you are getting out of this. Surely, I give you more than this?”

“OK.” Lisa got up from the table and moved round to where Shanna was sitting, rubbing a hand across the back of her shoulders as though it was in preparation of something, but Shanna abruptly pushed her hand away.

“Sarah and I have been seeing each other. For a little while. A few months maybe, I lost track of time.”

Shanna’s jaw dropped. Scott should have felt something but after glancing at his mother stood in front of him on the other side of the table, and recognising the same look in her eyes, he stayed quiet. He saw Sarah close her eyes and figured someone should try and comfort her, too, but it was hard to know where to stand.

Shanna found some strength to open her mouth a few times but no sound came out, until… “What?”

“You don’t need to worry, though. It’s over now.” He placed his bottle of beer on the table and leaned back. He placed his fingers on the edge, running them up and down the smooth, varnished wood. “She ended it by the way. Because she knew you wouldn’t be happy.”

Shanna’s mouth hung open, dry. “Is that true?” She turned to Sarah. “Were you with him?”

“I just said so, didn’t I?”

“I wasn’t asking you!”

Chris wasn’t sure what he was hoping for in that moment. He looked at Sarah and felt sadness. Sadness at the pain evidently coursing through her body in that moment. She looked small and deflated somehow. He felt astonishingly sober, more’s the pity. He wished he could go to her and hold her but he knew it was the last thing she wanted. Probably what anyone would have wanted. It wouldn’t have helped matters and he wasn’t sure anything he could say now would do that job either.

Sarah took in an audible breath and looked at her friend. She blinked back the few tears that had gathered but it only seemed to make things worse. “I’m…sorry. I don’t know what to say.”

“I think I’ll just…” Michael pointed to the door and left the table as quickly as he could manage, no doubt to fill Carly in.

“Oh my God.” Shanna replied. She put her face in her hands and didn’t move. “I don’t believe this.”

Sarah looked beyond Shanna to Lisa who offered her a surprisingly reassuring smile that she was definitely not expecting. Did she feel grateful for it? She had zero clue. “I’m so sorry.”

“We don’t have anything to be sorry for, Sarah.” It was the gentlest tone Chris had spoken in all night. “Shan, I know it’s a lot to take in right now but you should know that this wasn’t just some fling or something utterly stupid. There’s a real thing here.” He looked to Sarah for reassurance. “Right?”

Sarah couldn’t look him in the eye.

“OK, I know I haven’t handled this in the best way-”

“-That’s an understatement.” Scott finally found his voice.

“-I accept that and for that, I am really sorry, I promise you. But you have to see things from my perspective here.”

“Chris, I don’t think that’s what needs to be said right now, OK? Your sister is very upset and I think you should maybe head home to sleep this off. Scott, can you...?”

Scott nodded in agreement and left the room to grab both their jackets.

“Mom, this isn’t-”

“-I know.” She held her hand up to stop him. The less he said now, the better. At least until a few hours had been put between them. Chris, resigned, agreed.

He looked at Sarah again hoping for something, anything, that might make him think things were going to be alright. Lisa noticed the plea in his eyes, practically begging her to look at him.

“Sarah, sweetheart, you both can stay here tonight. I think we should probably be together for a bit, yeh?”

Sarah was flummoxed by the offer but grateful at the same time. She knew Shanna wouldn’t say anything to her if they just went home again, if she would even come back to their apartment at all. She’d shut her bedroom door and not emerge for some time and that would have driven her mad. She wanted to get out of there as fast as she could but…this was perhaps better. Safer.

It was going to be a long night.

#chris evans #chris evans fic #fan fiction #Sarah Bernette #clear the area #evans fic #chris fic #chris evans x original female character

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fencesandfrogs · 3 years

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cloudtail’s daughter: jayfeather

alright, strap in, it's time for jayfeather. i've been holding it in on him for what feels like forever now; he's ya boy's favorite character

also, aside from dove and ivy, he's the character with the highest volume of changes to canon. even above cloudtail and brightheart, because they continue their lives, it's not a big deal. and lion and cinder go to the tribe, but like, that's it. (i'm figuring out if jay goes with them over the course of this essay. i think i said he did in holly? but he literally hasn't been mentioned once in that arc because there's a lot going on.) anyway lion and cinder don't get up to anything. but jay's priorities shift and we see that in his books. i'm really excited to write him but i need to finish arc 1 lmao.

but first, same deal as always. this is part of my cloudtail's daughter au, where dovekit and ivykit are born to cloudtail and brightheart. i don't know how well this will read preemptively, but i suspect it will be rather dependent on the others. cloudtail's daughter: dovewing and/or the long post that explains it are both good places to start, see the cloudtail's daughter tag on my blog.

[2.5k words, 14 minute read, one of the last warriors essays on this blog. i'm going to finish out with my character essays and then everything will be on new sideblog. so check out @mallowstep for more.]

section one: the leafpool business

at the beginning of this series, leafpool and jayfeather are on bad terms. they will stay on bad terms for basically the entirity of the book series. while one of my main complaints with po3/oots is the lack of acknowledgement of adoption, jayfeather has been lied to by his mother and his mentor, something neither hollyleaf or lionblaze have to contend with, and then his sister kills herself over it. obviously she doesn't, but from his perspective. so he blames leafpool because he was really close to hollyleaf and now she's gone, and it's his first real loss, and there's so much going on.

and so he's a grouch and he's unhappy and he's just trying to function when his whole support system has been dismantled over the course of what, like, a quarter moon? yeah so dovekit and ivykit are like "wow what a grouch he sucks" the same way they don't realize prey is dying of thirst & etc.

for the most part he's j chilling and then hollyleaf comes back and man is it some family drama. unfortunately it's postponed til book 4 because hollyleaf and jayfeather have journeys but anyway i'm getting ahead of myself, because this section should end and unlike the hollyleaf essay i want to actually have decent organization.

section two: hollyleaf is away (but jayfeather doesn't get to play)

holly, cinder, and dove go to deal with beavers. we only get jayfeather through lionblaze in the books, but jayfeather is...conflicted. he got his sister back and lost her again and oh i should say. i think jayfeather and hollyleaf are the closer pair of the siblings. not that they don't love lionblaze the same, but you know how cats pair bond? like, it's usually a trauma thing, but even in feral cats, you see very close friendships. anyway yeah so for other au's i've been sorting siblings n denmates into pairs for this purpose (mostly jaywing au because there's a lot re. dovepaw and jaypaw and remember they are reincarnated siblings they've got a close bond going.) and it's kind of...i don't know my point is jayfeather misses his sister because she's like, his best friend too. or she was. and then she died and now she's back and she left again, and lionblaze is more concerned about cinderheart, so jayfeather just comes off as grouchy all the time. but really he's lonely and sad.

so yeah, jayfeather is kind of moping around camp and then the tree falls and whoops now briarpaw/light is parapalegic.

and uhh this goes more or less as in canon but we don't get pov which is fine bc u can sub in canon. but jayfeather? he's still a sad boy but now he's a sad boy with purpose and that makes all the difference

yeah he's close with her. they're sweet. it's sweet. he's pressured by brambleclaw to take an apprentice. he's bristly and angry and "you're not my real father" you know?

beaver crew gets back. jayfeather, who had missed holly, is back to being angry for...angst and plot purpose, really.

but you know, when you love & miss someone and they leave and they come back and somehow that's worse because now they can leave you again? and you can't tell them you want them to stay because you're angry and hurt but you want them to stay? god i'm excited to write these chapters i love emotional turmoil.

he's protective of briarlight, he's trying to keep dovepaw from being a medicine cat, hollyleaf is apologizing but he's not ready to hear it and lionblaze and hollyleaf are beginning to reconnect and it feels like betrayal. so when cinderheart and lionblaze go to the tribe, he tags along. everyone, uh, strongly encourages he go. he is the big grouch.

section three: time travelling times

okay so the timeline for these books is...messy. if you track the chronology of my writing, it's messy. which is to say, i was thinking i could put forgotten warrior and distant whispers over the same time span, but that actually doesn't work, as i review my notes for FW because a big part of it is ivy and holly's relationship. so. fake news. whoops. that sucks.

or maybe it doesn't? idk i don't usually tell linear stories. i like messing with emotional impact of events. so writing 600k of very linear story telling is very not easy for me. but i'm trying.

right so basically the official order of events until i change my mind again is as follows (names abbreviated as DIHLJC because they're all unique): DCH returns from beavers, DILCJ go to tribe with some other random warrior undecided, J + rando return, JH start awkwardness (beginning of TFW, middle of DW), DILC return (end of DW), time travel stuff (middle to end of TFW). hopefully that was intelligble, but it is admittedly 85% for my own benefit.

alright so we've covered during beavers, now jayfeather and hmmmm let's say, uhhhh, let's say they go with, literally any interesting background character, uh, bumblestripe! he doesn't do anything in this au bumblestripe goes with them. also since his name starts w b i can still write DIHLJCB and have things be unambigious. and it means there are fewer bs in thunderclan and trust me you don't know how frustrating the existence of like 6 b characters is.

alright so we really have 3 sets of two pairs of cats here. maybe i won't go w bumblestripe, bc he doesn't have an existing relationship w jayfeather. i dunno. i'm a big fan of jay & briar, whether as a ship or just besties, but that's just out, and hollyleaf can't come a) because i said so and b) honestly maybe she can? actually wait hold on that solves my problems. hot damn so 6/6 of the pov cats go to the tribe and this will be one of the only times all six characters are plot relevant at the same time. but i'm going george r r martin on it and seperating the books not by time but into DICL + JH because they're two completely separate character arcs that happen to take place at the same time. (don't worry i'm going to resolve the fallen leaves thing. in this essay ig bc i've already covered hollyleaf.)

okay so yeah hollyleaf is sent bc jayfeather isn't planning on staying w tribe for long time. just short time. and he's all "firestar why"

"well jayfeather," firestar says, "you don't talk to your family."

"i talk to dovewing," jayfeather says

"you're not related to her," firestar says

"there's a whole prophecy about how i'm related to her," jayfeather says

"you know about that?" firestar says

and that's how the cat gets out of the bag.

so anyway. jayfeather and hollyleaf are sent because...hold on, spinning the wheel of reasons for a character to go on a field trip...because...because...because...because...jayfeather had one of those dreams. i don't know. rock or something. now he's going.

they get there, and this is where the books get a lil time wonky, bc jayfeather and hollyleaf stay for like a moon, during which jayfeather goes back in time. i think.

i haven't worked out the details and probably won't until i do an updated au synopsis because it's hard to keep track and i'm more concerned about character through lines. like, jayfeather does this and he feels sad, and hollyleaf is sad about her ghost boyfriend, and they're travelling back together, and hollyleaf is his sister and she doesn't make him feel like he needs protection and lionblaze is bad at that, and they start to talk again.

and yeah, they bond. again. it's kind of, on top of their old bond? like they don't repair anything, they bond like strangers. but it's not nothing, and that matters.

so jayfeather gets back, and we're moving into book five, and i don't remember when the last time i made a section break was or what number we're on, so...sorry.

section ???: old man yells at cloud

alright it's finally jayfeather's moment. you know, he's one of my favorite characters, and he only gets a book and a half. "but mateo," i hear you saying, "doesn't every character get a book and a half? and more importantly, 6x1.5 is 9, so how does every character get a book and a half?" well, yes, every character does, but dovewing and ivypool are relevant in books 1-3 and 6, cinderheart in 1-3 and 5, lionblaze in 1-3, and hollyleaf in 2-5 (and has a critical role in 1 and 6, just no character development), while jayfeather is just really essential to books 4-5, and has a background role in 3. that means he's about equal to lionblaze. he's equal to lionblaze. as far as the numbers go, i cannot tell you. it's a mystery.

right so the reason for this is because (a) jayfeather doesn't do that much in oots. i love him, but he's not, like, super important, and (b) he's going to work better in these books if he's concentrated. because his big theme is his relationship with hollyleaf and the past. they're both kind of stuck in it but in different ways. and that prevents them from ever properly healing. so jay never has a full arc in this. i mean he has a full arc, it's just not a satisfying one. and that means he's sort of got to be put in the containment units.

so anyway, he gets his real big moments in the fifth book, when he's reuniting starclan. i think this is one of the riskier decisions on my part: we'll see whether or not i can deliver on him the way i plan to. but i think i can pull it off so that his arc is more meaningful condensed as such.

right. so. jayfeather is decided. he is going to fix starclan. because dead cats need to get thier shit together and he dgaf.

he spends a decent amount of time arguing with yellowfang and bluestar, because basically no important cats have died. at least we're in omen of the stars so it still makes sense? i have no idea why yellow/blue are still so important. please kill more important cats. it makes us feel things.

but feathertail is also probably going to be involved, i don't know. i haven't read these books (specifically, books 4 and 5 of oots) in forever so i don't really remember what happens. but he's kind of, super done with everything. i think he'll probably try to get the support of mothwing and kestrelflight (which is canon i believe?) and try to work as a team. i feel like there's weirdness w shadowclan too i should sort out.

so yeah, there's some medicine cat bonding, everything is OK, sol is happening? but cinderheart is dealing with that. jayfeather is naturally very upset about disconnects with sol but like he's also dealing with stuff i...i really need to reread outcast and sign of the moon. well, they're on my list after "all of these fucking riverclan novels like why they don't show up in the main series but i still have to read a bunch to be able to write them that's not fair."

alright, well, with that very vague description of what happens, moving on, the prophecy gets revealed to the clans at a whole in like...the ending eighth of this book. trying to maximise the amount of exposure to other clans without messing with the pacing.

so jayfeather and undecided warrior B (definitively not hollyleaf) go to windclan. jayfeather is...very unhappy about this. he does not want to leave. thunderclan is his home, and he's blind, and it's really hard to adapt to a new space and he thinks everyone is going to treeat him badly.

and well, if you've read my culture posts, windclan is....very pro-medicine cats and pro-prophecy cats. funerals. mourning. prayer. is probably the best place to start, but to get to the meat of it, start with general clan culture. to summarize, windclan: religious. but kind of like catholics, they don't believe in an individual connection with starclan. only leaders, and medicine cats, and very rarely members of prophecies have a connection. so. jayfeather. he's twice over. that's very cool to windclan.

so cats are kind of falling over themselves to help him, and like. i mean jayfeather is a grouch and he hates that he needs someone to help him through the territory, but at least they don't treat it like a chore, or like he's pitiable. this is a desirable task. apprentices want to know about his powers. and kestrelflight is a respected part of the clan, arguably more important than onestar, and jayfeather has never really gotten over being shoved in the healer hole as a child like it was lesser or easier to be a medicine cat, and so it's a big change.

and yeah. so i mean. an unobservant reader might say jayfeather has sufficient ego. he does not need stroking. they, of course, would be wrong.

jayfeather has a complex, but it's not an ego issue. he's...he's been denied everything he's wanted, and he's jaded, and weary, and he's never really believed that his clan views him as able and equal. in canon, at present, he's lost almost every cat he's every cared about. alderheart is his strongest remaining tie, and his fear at losing him, but willingness to let him leave, is very telling.

so yeah, jayfeather enjoys being accepted. anyone would. he doesn't really have confidence issues, but....argh. i know why this is good i swear it'll come out in the writing.

anyway, that's...that's pretty much it. jayfeather? done.

#warrior cats #warriors au #warriors #hollyleaf #jayfeather #q #mine #txt #13th #March #2021 #March 13th 2021 #cloudtail's daughter #essay #long

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unexpectedreylo · 4 years

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What Happened To TROS

There’s a show I watch on occasion called “Autopsy: The Last Hours Of...” featuring a medical examiner going over celebrity autopsy reports and explaining why the celeb died. (It’s on Reelz, in case you’re as morbid as I am.)

Many Reylos have gone over every statement uttered about the film and analyzed every bit of footage to see just what heck was going on with this movie. Based on what’s come out in the press I was about to pitch my own autopsy theories. But every day more comes out about TROS! Chris Terrio digging his hole deeper, Colin Trevorrow’s alleged “script” leaking on Reddit! As of writing, South Korea got the Art of TROS book first so images have been leaking all over the place.

Here are my takeaways at this point:

Problem #1: J.J. Abrams’s brand of filmmaking. Abrams is really good at fast-paced, fun-filled spectacle. He is also good at not explaining things, at interrupting every conversation with action/danger, and at forced, unearned moments that are more about winking at the audience than advancing the story/developing the characters. Case in point: Kirk and Spock acting out the Spock death scene from “Wrath of Khan” in “Into Darkness,” only with Kirk about to croak (he doesn’t). The movie did nothing to set them up as close friends. They were still sniping at each other the whole movie. So it’s unsurprising TROS also had all of those elements.

Problem #2: There was no plan. What’s come out since the film’s release seems to emphasize that they really had no clue how to wrap this thing up because nobody had a clue who these characters were or what their story means beyond Chris Terrio’s curious obsession with Luke and Leia. The audience attributed meaning based on what we got in TFA and TLJ but it seems like hardly anyone behind the scenes had any idea what that meaning was. They threw away George Lucas’s road map and decided to just keep driving until they got somewhere.

Problem #3: There was no time. When I was a kid, I’d see t.v. ads for Paul Masson wine starring the late Orson Welles. The ads’ tag line was always, “We will sell no wine before its time.” Bob Iger’s philosophy is “FTS, give me that movie yesterday!” He announced a new trilogy to start in May 2015 at the end of October 2012. That was less than three years. Recall that it took months to find a director and they ended up junking Michael Arndt’s screenplay, with J.J. Abrams and Lawrence Kasdan having to do a quickie re-write in late 2013-early 2014. Abrams was casting the film at the same time. He asked for more time but all Iger would do is move the release date to December 2015 because he’d promised shareholders it would be out that year. I felt that TFA seemed a little rushed and this explains why. J.J. Abrams and Chris Terrio were officially running the show as of September 2017. Originally TROS was scheduled for May 2019 but again Abrams asked for more time and the film was bumped back to December 2019. Still, that’s only two years and two months. Twenty six months to figure out how to end a trilogy, end a nine-part series, and work around the unexpected death of one of its stars. Oh and do all of this while you hadn’t given Star Wars a thought in years along with a screenwriter whose knowledge is pretty wonky. Is it any wonder why the script sometimes felt like it was written at the last minute by college students pulling an all-nighter on speed? By comparison, George Lucas started writing the OT in 1973, three years before he shot ANH and four years before release. He started writing the PT in 1994, three years before he shot TPM and five years before it was released. Star Wars wasn’t based on a novel or a comic book. The whole saga had to be cooked up from scratch. It required more time and more thought.

Problem #4: They didn’t get the best closer. After TFA, Abrams didn’t worry about the long game for the trilogy because the original plan was to be one and done. He never had to think about Rey and Co. ever again...until Colin Trevorrow got the hook in June 2017. I don’t know if Kathleen Kennedy had anyone else in mind or not. But I am certain Abrams was either Iger’s or Walt Disney Motion Pictures head Alan Horn’s idea. Why him even if he admitted he’s not a good closer? It’s simple: TFA made $2 billion. With no plan, limited time, and a few years of not thinking Star Wars at all, he had to quickly wrap up a series, something by his own admission he’s not very good at.

Problem #5: Too many disruptions. George Lucas somehow managed to survive changing directors for each of the OT, having to let Gary Kurtz go, and the end of his marriage to Marcia Lucas, who just happened to also be the films’ editor. The ST had to contend with Michael Arndt, Colin Trevorrow, etc. getting fired and someone else having to step in and work from scratch. Rian Johnson seemed to be the only one able to get through production unscathed, only to get his film retconned because of the internet peanut gallery. Carrie Fisher unexpectedly died, forcing everyone to rack their brains on how they were going to finish this without her.

Problem #6: They were totally out of touch with what audiences liked about the ST. Before the arrival of Baby Yoda, Kylo Ren was the most searched Star Wars character. Yes, even more than any of the OT characters. While lots of people love Rey, they loved Kylo just as much if not a tiny bit more. He was the one descended from the legends of our youth: Han Solo and Princess Leia, Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Amidala. It also helped that a highly-talented, charismatic actor played him. I think audiences were rooting for him but didn’t expect him to die. Even people I know who otherwise really liked or loved TROS thought they shouldn’t have killed him off.

Reylo was also the gas in the ST’s tank, not only as a romantic duo but as physical representation of the push and pull of the Force itself. Their interplay makes each character more interesting and make the story overall more interesting (I had little to no investment in the Resistance vs. First Order brouhaha).

A logical person would’ve milked this for all its worth but instead they killed off their most interesting character and half of the most interesting relationship in the trilogy. They left their heroine alone in the desert. Had Ben Solo and Rey killed off the Emperor together and survived, and the movie ended with the two of them walking off into the sunset, TROS would have sailed past $1 billion and counting weeks ago.

#reylo #tros #ben solo #ben solo deserved better #ben solo deserved to live #reylo fandom

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jebazzled · 4 years

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Why Aren’t People Writing With Me?

Why aren't people writing with me?

Real talk: do you often find yourself waiting weeks or even months between partners replying to your posts? Do people seem to prioritize all their other threads over yours? Do people seem to be just not that jazzed about writing with you? It's the worst feeling, when you're spinning your wheels and on the outskirts, wondering why you're struggling to gain traction. Sometimes, sites just be like that - people writing with their friends, or closed groups hard for a newer member to break into, or folks writing on slow timelines, or not keeping track of how long they've kept a partner waiting. It comes with the territory. But sometimes, it might be your writing that's holding your threads back. I know what you're thinking:

But it's something everyone can genuinely stand to consider, when they're having trouble getting a thread to keep moving: how much of this is my thread partner holding me up, and how much of it is me? Is there anything I can do to keep things moving? No matter how long you've been writing or how advanced a writer you are, it can be easy to forget that writing is ultimately a game of improv, and writing well is only part of the job. Part of the job is setting your partner up for a good time, too.

This tutorial is about writing starters & replies that make your thread partner excited to write back.

We'll be covering:

Starters that stall vs. starters that enthrall (sorry! the rhyme was necessary.)

Common tactics for writing replies - and common pitfalls of them

Alternate approaches to writing replies

Hopefully, these tips and tricks will improve your rp experience - because aren't we all here for a good time?

Onward!

STARTERS

Ah, starters. The bane of every roleplayer's existence. Starters are difficult because they often require some scene-setting, leaving the writer to try to set up a premise and a vibe without powerplaying for their partner. And then, you've got to start the interaction. There's a lot to contend with, so a lot of people avoid starters at all costs.

Personally, I like starting a thread: this way, I'm not waiting on a post; I have control over when it goes up. Thread partners often appreciate you writing a starter for them, so it's an easy way to engender good will. And finally, for me, it lets me make sure the thread is off to a good, actionable start.

Starters come with pressure - the starter sets the tone for the thread. A dud starter will stump your partner on replying, and they may even grow to dread posting. Which isn't fun for either of you!

Some things to consider when crafting a starter that will get your partner excited:

PREMISE Whether you're writing an open thread or a plotted thread for a specific partner, every starter needs a premise. The premise might be simple: perhaps your character is going to pickpocket your partner's. Maybe it's two friends catching up. It could be two strangers bumping into each other in an alley. It might also be more complex: maybe you're setting up an enemies-friends-lovers-enemies-rivals-lovers-friends-enemies plot. Maybe your character is defending the teaching of evolution to schoolchildren before a jury of his peers. Maybe it's a duel.

Generally, the more specific the premise, the better. This doesn't mean you need every beat of the thread plotted out, but it is good to think about: What do we want each character to get out of the thread?

Think of this as your overall goal for the thread. Is one character seeking reassurance or advice? Is there a business transaction being made? Have you and your partner agreed to hurt one character in a duel? If you can't think of an overall goal or point for the thread, the chances of stalling are high. This is common with "catch up" threads, especially ones in which neither character has particularly exciting updates to share. If only one character is "getting something" out of the thread, be careful in your own posts to set up plenty for your partner to respond to. Not every thread will have equal actionable payoff for both characters, which isn't inherently a bad thing. But if your posts don't give your partner much to engage with, the thread can read as selfish or one-sided - which isn't anyone's intention!

How do we want the events of this thread to impact this character, moving forward?

Related to the above, if both characters can walk away from this thread without any change - perhaps reconsider the premise or necessity of your thread. There is no shame in not doing a thread when it wouldn't mean anything to character development or plot progression for either character! "Just because" threads are always the first that drop on thread priorities - why not save yourself the trouble, and plot something you will both be excited about?

What is the most reasonable entrypoint for this thread?

Reality is filled with filler - moments in which nothing interesting happens, but which carry us from point A to point B. Conversation that goes nowhere and just happens for the sake of filling silence. But this isn't reality, this is fiction, which means we can cut the boring stuff and jump straight into the meat. If your premise is Character A pickpocketing Character B, don't open with Character A just wandering around the market, waiting for Character B to wander around the market, so Character A can pickpocket them: close your starter with Character A's hand around Character B's wallet. This gives your thread partner something to respond to (the theft) and in two fewer posts than it would have taken otherwise.

ACTION Dialogue is an engine for plot progression and for character development, and there is nothing quite as satisfying as strong dialogue. But questions, greetings, and other standard ways to launch an in-character conversation aren't your only options.

All a starter needs is action, and saying "hello," "what are you doing," or "hey! That's my pod racer!" are all actions. But actions can be silent, too, so long as they trigger a reaction from your writing partner. Character A pulling their hand out of the butt pocket on Character B's jeans, wallet in hand, begs Character B to react. Character C puking into the same trash can where Character D is searching for the utility bill they need for proof of address gives Character D something to dodge. Character E speedwalking through the grocery store and destroying the greeting card aisle gives Character F something to be horrified at. Even if A, C, and E all do it without saying a word. One thing you'll notice about each of the above premises is that they involve doing something - pickpocketing, puking/dumpster diving, grocery shopping. If you suspect your starters are leaving people underwhelmed, consider building your premise around action. The action doesn't need to be dramatic like the above examples. For instance, let's say that Character G is catching up with Character H after her divorce. They can do this over coffee in Character G's living room - but if they're walking their dogs while Character G's kids are with her ex-husband, you and your partner can use the dogs as emotional stand-ins:

Hannah dug her heels into the ground as Penelope started after a squirrel. Beside her, Gloria and Fifi both seemed not to see it. Hannah had never seen Gloria so out of it, so disconnected from the world around her. It frightened her. "How's Fifi holding up?" she asked, quietly, once Penelope calmed down and they kept walking. "I know Mike wasn't great to her, but - she probably misses the routine?"

Giving the characters some sort of verb to do beyond talking gives you more lenses through which to view an interaction, plus more opportunity for body language for your partner to respond to.

STARTERS: TL;DR Now that we've talked about how to start a thread on the right foot, let's quickly review our main food for thought items. Mind Snacks, if you will:

What do we want to get out of this thread?

Start on track for that result - do not lead with a detour!

Build around action - even small ones

Is the concept of this thread important or interesting? Would we be better served skipping it and writing something else?

REPLIES

Now your thread is off the ground. Excellent! It's a few posts in but your partner doesn't seem very excited - maybe they don't message you about how much they liked your reply, or how fun the thread is so far, or maybe they don't react to the tag in the server; maybe it's radio silence from them until they reply a month and a half later, when they're caught up on the threads they seem to keep shuffling ahead of yours. How do we move your thread up in the shuffle? Make it fun to reply to, and easy to reply to.

COMMON APPROACHES An easy way to tackle a reply is by having your character react to each action and dialogue from your partner's character:

Maycey slid into the navigator's seat of the L2-47 spaceship, almost kicking over a cup of Dark Matter Decaf.

"Sorry," she said, not looking at Brooks. "Are we still checking out Planet 42601, or did General Berry have us change course?" Brooks watched Maycey enter the cockpit, snorting as she almost knocked over his coffee. Though it wouldn't be funny to see what the brew would do to the controls of the L2-47. "No problem," he said. "General Berry wants us to do a pass over 42601, but we aren't doing a full landing."

This reply covers everything Maycey did in her post, but doesn't advance the thread. What comes next? Brooks hasn't given Maycey much information to process, nothing to act on, no juicy body language to consider. Maycey's writer is fully on their own to advance the thread. To move it forward in a meaningful way, they might come up with a plot development they need to run by Brooks's writer to make sure it's not stepping on anything Brooks had planned. They may need to make up some lore. They may need to expand the premise of the thread. Brooks may or may not have helpful input, but when push comes to shove, Maycey is the one who is going to put it in their reply.

Maycey whipped her gaze to her captain, shocked. "But sir - we've come all this way to rescue 42601. Berry - sorry, General Berry wants us to abandon them? Their distress signal took three days to reach us; the atomospheric poisoning has got to be lethal by now." Her hands didn't touch the controls - she couldn't bear to take them off course to the desperate planet. "Sir, we have to do what's right." Brooks took a sip of his coffee, thinking about his own family back on Orbital Sphere 23-Y2K. They'd put out a distress signal years ago, back in his own training days. He'd seen it during radar detection class, and he'd had to ignore it. For the Good of the Galaxy. Not a day goes by that he doesn't think about the flashing signal on his screen, and about clicking the popup window. Dismiss. This, too, is for the Good of the Galaxy. He has to pretend it doesn't bother him. "The right thing is what General Berry says," he said, putting the coffee cup back in its cupholder. "For the Good of the Galaxy."

All of that work from Maycey, and Brooks only gave us one sentence to propel the plot. Yes, he had a lengthy internal monologue debating it - but that interiority means nothing to Maycey, who isn't a mind-reader. In this scenario, the focus on Brooks's tragic backstory, without giving Maycey anything actionable, sets up a very one-sided dynamic. If this happens consistently over one or many threads, the tragic backstory no longer feels tragic in a meaningful way, but just feels like a trite device to be trotted out - to tell rather than show a reader that a character has depth.

How could this post give Maycey more to work off of? Below is the same reply from Brooks, with additions made in green, rearranged wording in blue.

Brooks could feel Maycey's stare - bewildered and accusatory. He can hardly blame her, but she should know by now that this is how the Galaxy stays out of the Great Bezosian Black Hole. Sheer obedience. He avoided her eye contact, took a sip of coffee. Sheer obedience. Just like years ago - back in his own training days. He'd seen it during radar detection class, his own family's distress signal back on Orbital Sphere 23-Y2K, and he'd had to ignore it. For the Good of the Galaxy. Not a day goes by that he doesn't think about the flashing signal on his screen, and about clicking the popup window. Dismiss. This, too, is for the Good of the Galaxy. He has to pretend it doesn't bother him. "The right thing is what General Berry says," he said, putting the coffee cup back in its cupholder - his hands are shaking; it misses the rim twice, sloshes onto the knee of his parasuit. "For the Good of the Galaxy."

This version acknowledges the primary beat of Maycey's post (something we will talk about later) - that is, her accusation - and adds body language betraying his doubts. While interiority is great, externalization makes it possible for other characters to engage with your character's thoughts and motives. Brooks's new post gives Maycey more to engage with, which will better set her up to give Brooks more to engage with, and so on. When you both do the lifting, you both have a better time.

Another common method - especially in conversational threads, especially in "catching up" premises - is to lean on dialogue and, more specifically, questions. But most conversations we have in life aren't nonstop questions!

"Trudy said you got married," Annabelle said, fiddling with the edge of the linen tablecloth. "Is that true? I thought you didn't like Edgar - not like that." Sasha took an enormous bite of raw cucumber, not even bothering to slice it. "We just got engaged, we're not married yet. Don't you like Edgar?" Annabelle looked away, suddenly nervous. She didn't know why it mattered to her whether or not Sasha liked Edgar - only that it did. "He's fine, I guess. But do you like him?" "I do! I love him. Will you be my maid of honor?" Sasha grinned at her friend. She wanted nothing else in the world but for Annabelle to be part of her special day.

This series of posts involves a number of questions both stated in dialogue:

Is Sasha married?

Does Sasha like Edgar?

Does Annabelle like Edgar?

Will Annabelle be Sasha's maid of honor?

And unstated:

Why is Annabelle nervous?

Why does Annabelle care whether or not Sasha likes Edgar?

The stated questions are yes/no questions, somewhat procedural. The unstated question and its implication - that Annabelle cares about whether or not Sasha likes Edgar because she might like Sasha - is a juicier question than the minutiae of wedding planning. But Sasha's writer isn't letting Sasha notice or react to any of Annabelle's body language (her nervousness, her fiddling with the tablecloth) and focuses instead on the simple questions, which are a cover for what isn't being said. Information does not need to be voiced for it to be acted upon. Let's look at the same line of posts, with additions in green for Sasha and in pink for Annabelle.

"Trudy said you got married," Annabelle said, fiddling with the edge of the linen tablecloth. "Is that true? I thought you didn't like Edgar - not like that." Sasha had wondered when Annabelle would ask. She seems on-edge, fiddling with the tablecloth, as though they've never had a picnic outside before. She's not sure why Annabelle is out of sorts, but it's making her feel out of sorts. Sasha took an enormous bite of raw cucumber, not even bothering to slice it. "We just got engaged, we're not married yet. Don't you like Edgar?" She gently grasped Annabelle's fingers, unclenching them from the hem of the tablecloth. "Edgar thinks you're the bee's knees." Sasha's hand on hers - her stomach did a flip, palms instantly feeling clammy, like she could swoon in the summer sun. Annabelle looked away, suddenly nervous. It's worse that Edgar likes her. Makes her feel vile for resenting him like she does. She didn't know why it mattered to her whether or not Sasha liked Edgar - only that it did. "He's fine, I guess. But do you like him?" It's a silly question - of course she loves him; how could she have said yes otherwise? But Annabelle seems not to believe her. Annabelle seems to worry. Annabelle is worried so much of the time - and so much for her - she tries to be reassuring, gripping her friend by the shoulders, offering a grin. "I do! I love him. Will you be my maid of honor?" She wanted nothing else in the world but for Annabelle to be part of her special day. Annabelle is her best friend - the only person she could stand at the altar with besides Edgar.

See how much more complex the dynamic is between these two when they have things to react to other than dialogue?

REPLIES PART 1: TL;DR So now we've addressed two common approaches to replies and seen how they can fall short, and discussed tips for elevating them. Your main takeaways:

Acting is reacting - react to your partner's dialogue AND body language, and give them some to work from, too!

Dialogue is not a game of Questions Only

If you're not driving the thread forward, you're slacking - don't leave it to your partner every time!

SYNTHESIZING: YOUR NEW APPROACH TO WRITING REPLIES

Now that we've discussed the pitfalls of action-by-action responses and dialogue-only threading, let's synthesize all of the above into one methodology for writing replies. The common pitfall of action-by-action responses is that one writer ends up only ever progressing the thread one sentence at a time - thinking of a post in terms of beats helps separate what actually needs substantive response, versus what is background information to inform your response. When I write a reply, I copy and paste my partner's post into the wordcounter window where I write my posts. I read their post and identify the beats - that is, what actually happens. For example:

Getting elected student body president was no joke. Hattie had worked for eleven long years to earn the position - bossed around her peers all the way from preschool. Back then, she'd been interested in power and prestige. But by the time she'd won the election junior year, she was exhausted. Now, on her first day of senior year, she was just excited about the choice parking spot. And yet, someone had the audacity - the nerve - to cut her off on the turn into the Keppler Family Parking Pavilion and slide right into her coveted parking spot. Crooked, so they took up the access lane to the adjoining handicapped spot. Too far forward, enough that she could see the metal RESERVED FOR STUDENT BODY PRESIDENT sign shaking on top of its pole. She threw herself out of her car, aiming the sole of her left Doc Marten into the license plate of the offender's Buick. "Hey, genius, there's no fucking run-off election this year!"

Because this is a starter, much of this is scene setting, which my partner could choose to echo, but the main things for them to react to are what my character - Hattie - offers in the moment:

dramatically throwing herself out of the car

kicking their license plate

swearing at them

Once I've distilled a post to the beats I need to respond to, I work my way through them, creating beats for my partner to respond to. With this method, a reply to the above might look like this:

Aunt Mildred's car was affectionately called The Boat for the first ten years of its life. Huge and unsinkable. That had changed when Aunt Mildred died in a boating accident over the summer, leaving Mikey the Boat's captain. Now, he just called it the Buick. And he wasn't very good at driving it - already he'd been honked at twice, overshot the turn into the parking lot, tires riding up on the curb. He pulled into the first available space. Figured he was outside the lines - but it seemed like the Buick was too wide to fit between lines anyway. And Aunt Mildred had never been one to follow rules. The terrible park job was in her memory. The sound of metal crunching at the back of the car, however, was not. If it's an accident, the Boat - the Buick - always wins, so Mikey gathered his violin case and drawstring backpack from the passenger seat, opened the driver's side door, and slowly got out of the car, turning his beanie backwards as if it mattered while he shuffled in his Adidas slides to the trunk, where a very short, very angry girl driving a Smart Car was trying to put the Boat - the Buick - in its place. "The car's not moving," he said, pulling a roll of Bubble Tape out of his backpack and taking a huge bite out of it. "But thanks for telling me my voting rights."

Mikey responds to Hattie's abuse of his car, but also gives Hattie a lot to respond to - minor dialogue, but a LOT of personal eccentricities that are bound to piss her off.

The dialogue and the action contribute to the trajectory of the thread - and giving Hattie something to play with keeps the musing about Aunt Mildred from feeling self-indulgent.

It's a small shift, going from thinking of posts as paragraphs to respond to to thinking of them as specific, small, actionable moments - but it makes a difference, especially in encouraging writers to be more thoughtful about creating opportunities for their partner to react.

REPLIES PART 2: TL;DR

beats, babey! not every sentence requires a response, but be sure to write some that do, whether it be dialogue or action.

ACTING IS REACTING!!!!!! if you don't give your partner something to react to, you are letting them down!

And that's all there is to it! Hopefully these examples are helpful as you think about ways to drive your plots and threads, and how to keep your own writing great for collaboration. The most important thing is to think of your writing partner. What do they need to be able to write back? What will make this thread exciting for them? How can you make sure this thread isn't serving you alone? Cheers, and happy writing!

#christ this was annoying to format #rp guides #resources #writing resources #rp writing #posts #starters #replies

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dinglemingle · 3 years

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💕Robron Tag Game💕

I was tagged by @softlass27 thank you! This was made by the brill @black-rose-also-blooms

1.) Indicate your preference (feel free to explain)

2) There are two free questions for you to ask people you are tagging (you can ignore - no pressure). The idea would be that everyone could contribute too, and make it more interesting! Let’s see if it will work haha.

3) Tag as many people as you want!

Affair era or husband's era? You don't need to spend more than five minutes on my blog to know that affair era is my favourite, husbands era is very dear to my heart though

Floral shirt or Brown leather jacket? Ooh both solid contenders but brown leather jacket! I actually used to have a similar one, parting with it was heartbreaking

Purple hoodie or Overalls? Overalls! The hoodie deserves to burn

Wedding 1.0 or Wedding 2.0? Aaah okay okay so as a whole? Wedding 1.0. I had a bit of a blip in late 2017-2020 which meant though I still watched and loved,I wasn't as invested in them so watching wedding 2.0 wasn't as exciting. The first Wedding has such a nostalgic feel for me . Wedding 1.0 just feels more them!? It's much more intimate and emotional, Aaron's literally about to go to prison. I can physically feel the love from wedding 1.0 when I watch it. For me wedding 2.0 is nice but quite simple. I loved the speeches,I loved that Seb was there and they were finally happy,but I just don't get as warm and fuzzy when watching.

Liv or Vic? Vic. I hate Liv. That's that :/

The Sugdens or The Dingles? THE SUGDENS! THE BEST! Genuinely tho,I adore their dynamic so much. Also they feel like one of the most realistic families on the show. I just think they have such a complex history and dynamic. Robert and Andy's relationship is one of my favourites. I can count on one hand the Dingles I like,if that

The lodge or Christmas 2017? The lodge. It adds about 10 years to my life,such pivotal moment in their relationship. Christmas 2017 is brill but it's too White heavy and I prefer mental breakdown Rob over sad Rob! Also,nothing beats “Falling in love with you ruined everything” top tier angst, one of my all time favourite eps!

Chrissie White or Rebecca White? Chrissie 100% She was an actual character,sure she wasn’t the best,but the things she did were understandable. Her relationship with Lachlan was quite interesting too. They killed off the wrong sister and I’ll forever be bitter about it. Rebecca was nothing more than a plot device.

Reunion 1.0 or Reunion 2.0? Reunion 2.0! A full rom-com style special how iconic! Aaron's speech, tattoo it on me please!

Alex or Mike? Honestly? Alex. At the time I hated him of course,he was just an irritating obstacle,but now I just find him hilarious. On my rewatches I just enjoy watching him be ignored by Aaron (boyfriend of the year honestly) the whole situation is just funny to me. Plus he gave us "It's you and me ,it always has been,it always will be" one of my absolute favourite robron quotes.

The Love We Stole or Make You Feel My Love? Both. I love them equally (I see you all with your Adele slander) I'd say the love we stole is more their song,the lyrics fit them To a T, and I associate that song with them only. Whereas with Make you feel my love,I love it as a song anyway but It's extra special because of them. The love we stole is my happy comforting robron song, Make you feel my love is my sad balling my eyes out robron song when I miss them.

Lay-by or Barn? Lay-by!! Where it all began (although technically the barn counts too) I wish they'd done more with the barn, like it was used twice,I like to think of it as the main meeting place during the affair but it would've been nice to see it more on screen.

Proposal 1.0 or Proposal 2.0? Proposal 1.0 no contest. I count proposal 1.0 as their whole ssw EPs and I'm a slut for a soap disaster,so as you can imagine it was a dream come true! "I'm not leaving you,no" ICONIC.

2016 or 2018? The worst years :/ 2016 had the abuse storyline which was brilliant but it was far too to liv centric and boyfriends era was kind of overshadowed by that. I have the same problem with 2018 but with she who shall not be named. She was just bloody everywhere!!! Inescapable, I hated it. However we did get lots of soft domestic moments, wedding 2.0,the reunion and Seb of course. I do love husbands era so I'd have to say 2018

Chas or Diane? Diane! My love. Chas is somewhat irredeemable now,it would take a hell of a lot of work and Paddy taking a long walk off a short cliff for me to like her again. I've always had a soft spot for Di and I miss her at the pub

Boyfriend era or affair era? Affair era of course. My all time favourite. It's just so good omgg peak angst, drama, romance! The full package, Romeo and Juliet vibes truly. Boyfriends era simply does not compare,it was messy and they weren't even given the chance to be proper boyfriends :'(

This was great fun,I would've added my own questions but my mind went blank!

I'm pretty sure most people have done this by now,so I won't tag anyone (I'm rubbish at it anyway) but if you haven't and you want to please do,and tag me! I've loved reading these so far

#tag games!#i really liked this #robron chats #.

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u23art · 4 years

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A LOOK AT THE STARGATE FRANCHISE

A Look at the Stargate Franchise Stretching over the expanse of nearly 20 years, the Stargate franchise persevered as best it could, entertaining audiences with scifi/ military adventures with various SG teams across many planets. And by golly, over the last month, I took it upon myself to watch all the Stargates. Starting with the Stargate film, the adventure begins with the discovery of an artifact in Giza, covered in glyphs, experts suspected the portal like object to have originated by an intelligence earlier than the Ancient Egyptians. Nearly 80 years later, historian/ archeologist/ anthropologist Daniel Jackson (James Spader) is recruited by a military outfit and successfully deciphers the meaning of the glyphs and the artifact. Each glyph coordinates with a constellation, using 6 around a destination along with a point of origin creates a wormhole to travel along between two of these artifacts called Stargates. Joining up with a team lead by Col Jack O’neill, they set off to a distant planet, meet an ancient life form that nurtured Earth’s earliest cultures and liberate a desert people from the alien that named itself their god. This film, though overshadowed by the media that came afterwards, is an earnest adventure story that knew what it wanted and nailed the landing. The world building is solid and doesn’t interfere with the story progression and creates a sympatico relationship with the character Daniel Jackson. The character’s enthusiasm for understanding the culture validates the importance of the world and the world in turn gives Daniel Jackson a muse to let him flex his intelligence, giving audiences some engaging and thorough analysis to connect with. James Spader gives a stand out performance with this character and becomes the backbone of the film, with no disrespect towards Kurt Russell. Combined with effective special effects, the 1994 film cements itself as a science fiction must-see. Following up the movie, running ten years from 1997 to 2007, Stargate SG-1 was a prime contender on Showtime and the scifi channel.

Recasting O’neill and Jackson with Richard Dean Anderson and Michael Shanks, the two form a team with Samantha Carter (Amanda Tapping) and a former enemy soldier Teal’c (Christopher Judge). Expanding upon ideas set by the film, the galaxy is under the rule of another parasitic race known as the Goa’uld. This show was balanced and well cared for. Some charms of this show carry over from the movie, namely the relationship shared between each new world and Daniel Jackson, and this time this aspect is improved upon by the performance by Michael Shanks. He had fun with his character, his character loved exploring and that validated each new world the team visits. On top of this, the worlds aren’t just one and done, with each new season brings evolving politics, making the story well-constructed and leaving next to no added fluff. Regarding the new actors aside from Michael Shanks, Richard Dean Anderson portrays Jack O’neill with a calm yet playful demeanor, making him a comforting presence in any seemingly stressful situation. Teal’c is portrayed by Christopher Judge, giving a performance offering strength, sensitivity and breathtaking deadpan comedy. Samantha Carter however, played by Amanda Tapping, is a bit of a double edged sword. Sam Carter is stubbornly professional, meaning that she approaches problems with calm inquisition, but she doesn’t actually have a character arc. Despite getting her chops busted constantly by coworkers and villains alike, she responds to nearly every show of pigheadedness with “with all due respect”. I can’t think of many instances where she gives an aggressive or sarcastic response to rude behavior, and further still I don’t think there was a single point where she cracked a joke. But I digress, all in all SG-1 is a well-oiled machine and earns it’s good reputation. Next up is Atlantis. Running from 2004 to 2009, we find ourselves in a new galaxy with a new SG team led by Col John Sheppard. Lasting only 5 seasons, the show left behind a few ingredients that made it’s predecessors as engaging as it was, but still provided fun character interactions. The show is more action based, most stories depicting each new world as a new danger and resolving many conflics with hammers rather than scalpels. And the team this time around lacks a character like Daniel Jackson, removing the element of curiousity towards the worlds and in turn the worlds begin to lack appeal. The writing began to lean more on characters than world building, but regardless, John Sheppard and his crew provide fun, banter and action. And then came Stargate Universe. Thanks, I hate it. This show lasted only 2 seasons and a comic book mini series, and I couldn’t be happier. I can’t remember the last time I watched such an uncharismatic show, with an uncharismatic cast on an uncharismatic set. Lasting even less time than Atlanis, with only 2 seasons from 2009 to 2011, adventure is abandoned entirely and replaced with a survival story. Here we follow a group of civilians and SGC personnel, dragged along by the obsessive curiosity of the total sociopath; Dr. Rush. Deciphering a Stargate address with not 7 but 9 glyphs, Rush drags over 40 survivors of a base attack onto an abandoned, ancient ship called the Destiny. Several galaxies away from earth and unable to control the ship, Rush seeks to uncover the mission of the Destiny while everyone else just wants to get home. The funniest aspect of this show is that it’s structured like a reality tv show, take a bunch of irritated people, isolate them and watch the chaos ensue. There’s even a surprise pregnancy, and I totally watch scifi for that. As for world building, there is next to none. Each world is one and done, managing only to give the characters brief periods to have some shenanigans before moving on. There’s plenty of intrigue regarding the Destiny, from the get go it raises a number of questions; what was the ship’s purpose, why was it abandoned, where is it’s crew. Only one of these questions is truly answered; the purpose of the destiny was to track down and investigate an energy signature supposedly left behind from the birth of the universe, essentially a journey to find God in a sense. Story progression drags it’s feet and without proper focus. The main point of intrigue is the Destiny and it’s mission, then there are the ongoing problems of cabin fever among the civilians and then there’s the emotional turmoil of the SGC soldiers and their emotional instability. None of this is executed in a way that works, the characters certainly perform but none of what they do contributes to learning anything new about the Destiny, leaving me with total apathy towards scenes with most of the characters because they’re irrelevant to the main point of interest towards the show. I found myself just glazing over the characters problems because they don’t contribute substance in tandem to the main story. This is not helped by the fact that the characters wear dull, dark clothes on a dull, dark space ship, leaving no scene looking particularly remarkable. In addition to the problems on the Destiny, there is an issue of cloak and dagger espionage on Earth, this becomes more interesting by default because we join members of the original SG-1 team in well-lit locations with a clear problem and characters willing to solve said problem. The series ends unspectacularly and was followed up by an unspectacular comic that still doesn’t resolve the ongoing problems. This show bears the name “Stargate” but lacks all the elements that made what came before it so entertaining. The show was cancelled due to issues of poor reviews and financial trouble and at present there’s no chance of a return, and I won’t lose sleep over this. Then after wrapping up my time with Universe, I ended my Stargate marathon with Stargate Infinity. Stargate Universe was a standard 26 episode animated series from 2002 to 2003, airing on the short lived Fox Box and produced by Dic animation. Set years ahead of SG-1, Gus Bonner and a rag tag SG team are framed and accused of treason, finding themselves banished by Stargate command and chased by an alien race called Tlak’kahn. It’s a show for young audiences, and made by an animation studio that pumped out a lot of budget cartoons. Though to this show’s credit, it was more bearable than Alienators: Evolution Continues, another Dic cartoon based off a science fiction property which displayed embarrassing writing like a badge of honor. The show is cheap, has passable animation, toy like character designs and barely taps into the ongoing conflict, making nearly every episode a contained story. Had I watched this before I watched Universe, I probably would have looked on this show with more scrutiny. However, this is not the case, and I can look on this show more favorably now that I’ve seen what Stargate can look like without most of it’s pieces. Despite the show’s faults, it still retains the idea of adventure and exploration, and it has episodes that lightly touch upon issues like living in poverty or dealing with addiction. And Gus Bonner had so many insightful things to say on issues of science and history, I found it rather wholesome. I even appreciate the colorful toy-like designs after several hours of next to no color at all during Stargate Universe. All in all, the show retains the Stargate identity and gives a decent enough show with what resources it has. There were several other pieces of media that came out for the Stargate franchise, such as books and games, but as of this time the Stargate Franchise is on ice for the foreseeable future. It was an underdog that had some bite to it, and that didn’t go unappreciated. It was refreshing getting to watch the shows and get a more complete perspective for the scattered episodes I’d seen when SG-1 was still on the air.

#Stargate #Stargate SG1 #Stargate Atlantis #Stargate Infinity #Stargate Universe #Jack O'neill #Daniel Jackson #Samantha Carter #Teal'c

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