#like I'd work- but then my brain would just scramble all over the place

[2smolbeans]

Small personal vanilla rant:

You'd think that March break would give you some time to relax as a student right? Nope- I currently have 12 assignments that STILL need to be completed and I'm so goddamn TIREDDDDDD

It's like 12am and I wanna SLEEP FUCKKKWJDJFWIIWBSBB ヽ( `皿´ )ﾉ💢

#2smolbeans ramble #like fuckkkk man #i know its gonna be worse later on #so god help me when im in uni #like I'd work- but then my brain would just scramble all over the place #next thing you know im pacing around the room trying to concentrate while my mind is just hyper and all over the place #why 12 assignments? procrastination and also i have 6 classes in this semester #so fuck me #i managed to submit 5 in but it feels like ive done nothing aaaaaaaaaa

[distorted59]

please elaborate on the dracula monster rp you mentioned in your kirk headcanons…PLEASE!!

YES OMG!!!! THANK YOU SM FOR ASKING THIS!!!!

this idea has been FEEDING my vampire kirk brain rot so well, esp those fanarts on insta👹👹 really check out @ fuzzsux on insta CAUSE THE ART IS SO GOOD!!!

anyways..... HERE'S MY IDEA FOR IT (any era works tbh)

Bite me please

summary: Kirk wants to play dracula and he wants you to play his bride...

pairing: '93!kirk x fem!reader

warnings: nsfw/smut, biting, roleplay, use of safe words,

word count: 1158

A/N: i was debating wether to make this really kinky or nah.

you'd always known Kirk's favorite monster were vampires. especially Dracula and it's whole story arc. he's a hopeless romantic with a dark kinky side. which you don't mind at all, of course.

he loves the idea of him being a powerful, mind infiltrating, seductive, blood sucking creature. who would stalk you, love you, claim you, and mark you as his bride.

it would start with him biting your neck for fun, not real harshly or anything. just some playful bites. and you seem to like them. he would get all excited and wanted to ask you right away, because this has been on his mind for a while now.

but, he still sorta backs out. you see he wants to ask you something, so you do it first.

"baby? what's wrong?" you slide your hand over his back. "Something on your mind?"

"yeah, actually." he has a wide smile on his face, which slowly turns into a smirk. "would you be interested in... uhh... roleplay?"

your eyes widen a bit and your breath hitches. you have a puzzled look on your face and let out a short giggle.

"what'd you have in mind?" you grin back.

"what do you think?" he leans down and bites your neck again, harder this time.

"do you want to drain me from my blood, Count Dracula?" you say in a bad, sensual transylvanian accent.

"oh..." Kirk groans and lets out a breathy chuckle against your neck. "i'd like to drain you from something else too."

you moan softly as he places more sloppy kisses on your neck, going up to your jaw and eventually kisses your lips.

"i'll take that as a yes, hm?" his eyes show a dark gaze, you can see the passion and lust in them.

"yes."

⋆♱✮☽🦇☽✮♰⋆

you're walking around the house, wearing some leathery outfit. which Kirk had picked out for you. along with a tight, blood red corset that is hugging your figure.

"so much for classic." you mumble to yourself. the house is dark and to be honest, you feel a little.... scared.

you don't know if it's the excitement bubbling in your lower belly or the actual thought of being haunted by your boyfriend...

"Kirk?" you call out faintly, looking around for him. "are you gonna jump out and attack me or something?" you say jokingly.

"that all depends, my love." Kirk's dark voice whispers to you, you can feel his breath against your neck.

you turn around and he immediately grabs you and slams you against the wall. he starts kissing your neck and leaving a few bites here and there. he moves down and starts biting on your collarbone, he looks up at you through his eyelashes.

he's wearing a ruffled blouse and a pair of black dress pants you've never seen him wear before. His chest glistens through the low cut shirt, a few faint love bites visible.

"color?" he whispers.

"green..." you breathe out.

"I'm going to drain you and make you mine." he growls. then, he drags you by your arm and pulls you into your shared bedroom. he pushes you on the bed and you scramble back against the headboard.

"w-what are you going to do to me?" you try to sound scared and get into your role as the 'victim'.

"look at you, scared little thing." he tuts and crawls over to you. "you're going to be my bride." his eyes shine with passion and power. you actually feel thrilled.

"are you going to hurt me?" you look into his eyes.

"just for a bit, darling." he tugs on the laces of your corset. "i'll make you think of something else."

Kirk nuzzles his face in your neck and drags his nose slowly down your collar bone and towards your breasts.

"you smell so fucking good." he groans.

you can only respond with a moan and your hands make way through his hair.

"hmm, are you ready, my love?" he kisses your jaw.

"please." you nod.

he pulls down your pants along with your panties and he's taking his sweet time with it too. he grins teasingly at you and slowly slides his hands up your legs and thighs.

"Kirk..." you whine.

"gonna mark you, my love"

he pulls down his pants and boxers and pumps his throbbing cock slowly, he slides it between your pussy lips and the both of you moan and shiver with pleasure.

"you're already wet enough for me, love." he decides to pull back and slide his fingers inside of your dripping cunt first. "and i didn't even really touch you yet..."

"k-kirk!" you moan as he stretches you out by adding a second finger. he curls them up and you gasp, letting your head fall back.

"there, all ready for me." he groans and lines himself up with your cunt.

he slides in and starts biting your neck harshly, you let out a moan that's mixed with pain and pleasure. you're positive you'll have a bruised neck with bite marks in the morning.

normally he's quite the one to talk, but he's too busy fucking and sinking his teeth into you. too pussy drunk to function.

Kirk's hips slam against yours, his moans muffled by your skin as yours are the only ones that fills the room. your whines drive him insane and he bites you harder.

"color?" he growls, his sweet intention gives you butterflies. but his cock pumping into you make them flutter away.

"nghh- gr-green!" the biting hurts but you like it. you swear if he keeps going, he might draw blood.

he bites different spots and sucks on them too, it drives you fucking insane and pushes you over the edge.

he keeps up a steady rhythm and feels you squeeze around him, he stops biting you and kisses you passionately.

"are you going to cum?" he grins, his lips red from marking you up.

you nod as tears stream down your face, the pleasure becoming too much for you.

"cum for me, my love."

you moan his name as your orgasm washes over you, Kirk keeps pumping into you like a wild dog in rut. he moans and grits his teeth, needing to bite on something.

"use me, bite me." you whine.

he bites down on the other side of your neck and cums inside of you, you can feel it shooting up inside you and he twitches like crazy.

he lets go of your neck and falls on top of you. he takes a few breaths and rolls over on his back, pulling you on top of him.

the two of you lay in each others arms and try to calm down.

"that was fucking amazing." he breathes out. "i love you so much, baby." he kisses your temple.

"was.. so good.." you murmur, feeling absolutely exhausted.

"it was." he grins.

he slides his fingers over the bite marks carefully, and smirks proudly.

you feel yourself drifting off, feeling safe in the arms of your monster-loving boyfriend.

"i want to really taste you next time."

#blood play anyone? #who said that #thanks for the ask! #thank you anon #kirk hammett x reader #kirk hammett smut #kirk hammett fanfiction #kirk hammett x you #kirk hammett headcanons #my headcanons #kirk hammett imagine #kirk hammett fluff #metallica #fanfiction #fanfic #metallica fanfiction #metallica smut #metallica oneshot #distorted59 #i had no idea where i was going with this

[beembeem]

Hey, Love your work! Do you think you could write aizawa x student reader that was abandoned? (platonic, of course)

Have a nice day!

Aww, thank you, Anon! I'd be happy to write aizawa content he's one of my favorites! (^_^) this request hits a little close to home (a bit too close haha) but I had a lot of fun writing this! Let me know what you want me to write next!

Y/n sat on the streets curb, clutching her go bag tightly to her body, the rain pelting her hunched figure and drowning out her silent sobs. Y/n knew her parents were tired of her, all the threats they threw at her, their constant bickering, the number of times her parents told her they hated them to her face. Everything boiled up, and in a fit of rage, y/ns parents threw her out of the house. Leaving her where she is now. A homeless teenager bawling her eyes out in the rain while sitting on a curb in the city of mustafu.

Y/n jumped when a hand was placed on her shoulder, she was so lost in her scrambled thoughts that she hadn't noticed the blue umbrella shielding her from the rain. Y/n looked up and then over at her homeroom teacher squatting beside her holding the umbrella over her. "Y/n? What are you doing out here?" He asked, noting your tear stained cheeks and red puffy eyes. "Are you okay? Are you hurt?" He questioned frantically scanning your body, without giving you time to answer he stood and pulled you up with him "I'll walk you to your house."he said before handing you his umbrella "m-my parents don't want me there" y/n said, already" choking on her words and fighting the tears that threatened to spill."your parents kicked you out?" Aizawa asked and y/n nodded, fiddling with her pajama shirt, her parents didn't allow you the luxury of getting real clothes on.

"Shit," he cursed under his breath, "alright, come on, I'll take you to my house." He said before grabbing your empty hand and leading you along."Despite the fact that having you at my house is wildly inappropriate, it's either that or you catching your death in this rain. He stated that matter of factly, "plus nemuri would beat my ass if she knew I left you out here." he walked with you following closely behind him before long. You ended up standing outside of his apartment door, your brain still processing the events, and short-circuiting y/n could barely remember the walk. Mr. Aizawa twisted the key to the door, opened it, and ushered you inside. You immediately took off your soaking wet slippers and stood awkwardly by the front door while Aizawa put his coat and umbrella in a nearby closet. "Alright, kid, I'll run you a hot shower, then I'll call nedzu and let him know what's going on." He said, "a-alright. " You filled with the fabric of your wet shirt again, starting to lose yourself to your mind when you were pulled back by two snaps."Did you hear me? Bathroom is the first door on the left, " he said while pointing down the hall."Oh! Sorry, " you apologized before quickly running off to the bathroom and savoring a hot shower.

After drying yourself off and getting dressed in the clothes, Mr. Aizawa gave you and you silently, walked to his kitchen where you found him slumped at the table. You awkwardly stood in the doorway to the kitchen. "Uhm, thank you for the clothes, Mr Aizawa!" You thanked him, and his tired moved from his phone to you."No problem, they're just things nemuri left here." He stated before going back to his phone."nedzu said he reported your parents for child abandonment." He said, motioning you to sit down in the chair across from him before he stood up "I made some cocoa, I made you some" he walked over to the kitchen counter and grabbed two mugs full of hot chocolate then returned to the table and set a cup down in front of you. "Thank you!" You said before taking a sip. "So," he stared at you. "What happened?" He asked bluntly. You froze for a few seconds before breaking down in tears .t-they just ditched me, I loved them, and they just threw me our like I meant nothing!" You cried."I - I don't have anywhere else to go! They were all I had and now I won't be able to go to UA because I can't afford my stupid tuition, and-and" it felt like you were choking, you couldn't let anything out except for tears and sobs. Aizawa moved to comfort you, pulling you into a hug and patting your head. He hushed you before saying, "we'll figure it out." You grabbed the back of his shirt and cried even harder.

There'd be hell for your parents to pay.

#aizawa x reader #aizawa x student reader #aizawa shouta #aizawa shōta #bnha x reader #bnha #mha x reader #mha #nemuri kayama #platonic relationships #platonic reader x aizawa shouta #beginner writer #requests open

[mariposa-writes]

The Assistant - Part 3

Summary: You loopy on drugs.

Word count: 1.5k

A/N: Hi, sorry this took so long to get out. I know many of you have been waiting for a third part to this. I was super busy with midterms and then working during all of spring break. I didn't even touch my computer until last night. Hopefully the next few chapters will come out sooner than this one.

Make sure to like and comment! I love feedback!

You alarm was going off, making you groan. It was to early for this. You just wanted to sleep longer. You hated waking up early in the morning, you liked staying up late at night.

You snoozed your alarm for the 5th time, when Travis knocked on your door. "Y/N, you up?" He slowly pushed the door open, letting in light from the hallway.

"Travis" You whined motioning towards the door.

"We gotta leave in 15 minutes."

You buried your face in the pillow, "Just cancel the surgery. I don't want it anymore. I'd rather walk with a bum leg." He rolled his eyes.

"I expect you in the car in 15 minutes or I'm dragging you out." He shut the door, leaving you in darkness.

You groaned, reaching over to turn on the lamp. You put on shorts and a hoodie, before going through your basic morning routine. You were walking into the kitchen 10 minutes later.

"It should be a crime to get up this early just for someone to cut into your body." You complained, as you slipped on your tennis shoes.

"You're just a ray of sunshine in the morning." You rolled your eyes. Travis and you have had enough early morning together that he knew you hated them.

Travis on the other hand was a morning person. You also despised him for it. Why couldn't he do late night workouts instead of morning ones? You never knew.

You climbed into his car and got ready to take another nap. You had a 45 minutes drive and you planned to use it wisely.

You were out within 5 minutes. Travis looked over at your sleeping state and couldn't help but smile. He liked when you looked relaxed, which was something he rarely got to see.

Once you guys got there he woke you up. You guys entered through a private door, so other patients wouldn't see Travis. You sat on the bed in your hospital gown, waiting for the nurse to come back.

"Nervous?" Travis asked.

"What? No. I'm fine."

He raised an eyebrow, "Really, cause you haven't quit tapping your fingers since the nurse told you it was almost time." You placed your hand in your lap, forcing yourself to calm down.

"Maybe I'm a little nervous."

"Don't be. Doctor Locke is a great doctor."

"I know and you'll be here when I get out right?" You asked looking almost bashful, like you didn't believe Travis would stay for the whole thing.

Travis wanted to frown at your question, of course he'd be there when you got out. He wasn't just going to leave you, but what he didn't know is that's what you expected from people.

When you were 11 you had appendicitis and when you got done with the surgery your mom was no where to be found. She'd gone on a date that night, leaving you to an empty hospital room when you'd woken up.

"I'll be here, don't worry." Travis said just as the nurse walked in.

"Ready?" She asked with a bright smile on her face.

"I guess." You said as she injected something in your arm and wheeled you out. You don't remember anything after that.

All you do know is that when you woke up Travis was there, sitting by your bed. "Hey," he said standing up and coming over to you. You smiled at him as his hand reached out to cup your face.

He used his thumb to remove some of hair on your forehead. You leaned into his touch, not even aware of what you were doing. Travis pulled his hand back, when the nurse came in with the doctor.

"Ah, glad to see your awake." Dr. Locke said, as the nurse jotted down your vitals. "Vicky here's gonna help you get dressed and then you'll be free to go." He said pointing to the nurse.

"Ok." You said, trying to keep up. Your brain was scrambled from whatever they used to put you asleep.

"Hey, I'm gonna step out. I'll be back in a minute." You frowned at Travis, "I'll be right back promise."

You nodded, "Ok, lets get you dressed sweetie."

-----

"Dr. Locke." Travis called following the man.

"Hey Travis, what can I do for you?"

"Nothing. I just wanted to say thanks for squeezing her in."

"No problem, anything for a you. She must be pretty important for you to call. You two make a cute couple."

"Oh, she's not my girlfriend. Just my assistant."

"My bad, just judging by the way you looked at her I thought you two were together."

"Yea, just friends."

"Well your a good friend then, I don't know many people that would pay for their 'friends' entire medical bill." With that Dr. Locke left, leaving Travis in the hallway.

Just friends, he reminded himself. You'd never acted interested in anything more and Travis didn't want to overstep or make things awkward.

You were a damn good assistant and he'd be mad if he messed that up and lost you. That's why he kept his distance.

Travis went back into your room and saw you laying in the bed. "She's gonna be out of it for a while and kind of drowsy. We order her some put some pain meds in this bag for her, along with everything else she might need.

"Travis!" You cheered when you finally noticed he was in the room. "You're here!" You smiled bigger than he had ever seen before, making his heart clench.

It's just the drugs, he reminded himself. "Told you I'd be here." He responded, now standing next to your bed.

"We're ready to take her downstairs and load her into your car." The nurse said as she brought in a wheelchair. Travis nodded as the nurse continued, "You can pull your car up the same entrance you came in we'll meet you there."

"Sounds good." He turned to you, "I'll be right back, just gonna get the car."

"Ok," You nodded seriously, which made him laugh.

The nurse loaded you into the wheel chair and pushed you to the entrance Travis was waiting at. He parked the car and got out taking over for the nurse and loading you into the car.

You weren't supposed to put any pressure on your leg for the next 3 weeks. Once you were loaded in the car, Travis got in and started driving. "Travis." You whined, gaining his attention. Not that you ever really lost it.

"What's wrong?" He asked worrying about you.

"I'm starving. I haven't eaten in like 50 million years." You whined, causing him to laugh.

"I don't think it's been that long."

"I think I would know how long it's been since I've last eaten." You replied.

"Ok, my bad." Travis said turning onto the highway. "How about I order us some food, for when we get home."

"Ok, I'll take pizza, Chinese, Mexican, and Italian."

"Your sure you don't want to choose just one?"

"Nope, it's been 50 million years. I want them all." Travis laughed. "Can you please not laugh. How would you feel if you hadn't eaten in 50 million years?" He put a hand over his mouth trying to muffle his chuckling.

You kept talking about random things as he drove you to his house. He was trying not to laugh, but the random things you were blurting out was making it hard.

Finally he pulled into his garage. "Travis!" You shouted as he turned off the car.

His head snapped to face you, "What?"

"How am I supposed to get into the house if I can't walk?" You were starting to freak out. You didn't want to be stuck in his car for 3 weeks.

He placed a hand on your arm calming you down. He spoke slowly, "I have crutches in the back seat for you. Plus I'll help you inside."

You nodded, slowly processing his words. He opened the door and grabbed the crutches for you and then helped you out of the car. You slowly made it inside, Travis helping you the whole way.

He helped you into his bed, and got you situated. "Ok, I'll be right back. I'm going to go order food." He put the remote next to you. "You can watch tv if you want."

"Do you have paramount?"

"No, but I have netflix, hulu, hbo max, peacock, and disney plus."

"How do you not have paramount? It has my favorite show on it." That's when your eyes widened, "Can you not afford it?" You whisper shouted.

He laughed, "I can afford it. But I might not be able to after I order all the food you requested."

"Yes! Go order the food" You commanded, pointing towards the door.

He chuckled, before leaving the room to order all the food you wanted. He had to call 5 different restaurants and placed an order through Hyvee for some ice cream to be delivered.

After he was done he went back to his room, where you were currently staying, to check on you. You were passed out in his bed, with a random tv show playing that he didn't recognize. He grabbed the remote from his nightstand and turned off the tv, before shutting off the lights and exiting the room. Leaving you to rest after a long day, despite it only being noon.

#travis kelce imagine #travis kelce fic #travis kelce x reader #travis kelce #nfl fanfic #nfl imagine #nfl #kansas city chiefs #kc chiefs #chiefs #super bowl

[triplesilverstar]

File versions are important

There are several people to blame for this masterpiece and I'd name you all here but I don't want anyone to be uncomfortable. So thanks folks for this brain worm of being railed by Professor Wolfwood that I had to write to get it out of my head. Go with whatever version of Wolfwood you want folks. He's just got some sexy salt and pepper going on.

Pushing a hand through your greasy hair as you tap your foot at the print shop before looking at your watch again. Biting your lip because of the nerves coursing through your system, you only have half an hour until your paper is due and you spent the last eight hours making your final edits. You weren’t a procrastinator by any means, as soon as you’d seen the assignment you had started. The problem was your professor. 

Professor Wolfwood was a known stickler for details and grammar and was well known for having made more than one student cry over the years. You’d seen it in person during your first month in his lecture hall. So you knew you needed this paper to be perfect in every sense of the word. Biting your nail as you looked at your watch again and your time was slowly slipping away. The professor was one of the few you had that still believed in paper copies of your work, then again given his field you shouldn’t have been all that surprised, as a theology professor he seems to be rooted in hard copies like the books he lectured on. 

After what felt like an eternity you were handed your documents and you ran as fast as your legs would take you towards where Professor Wolfwood’s office was on campus with a third of your final grade in hand. Sliding to a stop and almost landing on your butt as you quickly knocked against the wooden grain of his door and tried to make yourself look more presentable. 

“Cutting it close aren’t you?” His voice is gruff as he opens the door and states your name almost as if you’re nothing but dirt he walks on but holds out his hand regardless for you to hand him your paper. Swallowing as his salt and pepper hair seems to wave in an air current you can’t feel, hoping he takes it for nerves and not your attraction to the broad figure before you. If he had been anyone but one of your teachers that you met in a bar or on a date you’d have let the man rail you long before now. 

Who wouldn’t with the way his jaw seemed to always sport a five o’clock shadow and his hair was in disarray as if he had just rolled out of bed. The smell of tobacco wafted from his skin with a smell you couldn’t place but it certainly was a smell that had fed many of your fantasies over the weeks you’d been in his classes. Once someone had thrown a bottle of water at him and your entire lecture hall had received an amazing view of the man as his white dress shirt clung to every inch of him. Trying to find your tongue in your mouth before you started drooling you gave a quick nod hoping it didn’t make you seem like a bobblehead. “I know you like perfection, Sir.” 

Flipping through your paper before setting one of his dark orbs firmly on you. If you hadn’t been trying to hide the flush on your cheeks you might have noticed the way his eyes darkened the longer he took in your appearance. “Perfection doesn’t exist, but I expect my students to strive for it. Unless you have something else go home, you look like you need a shower.” 

Scrambling you started backing away, hitting your back against the corner of the hallway and letting out a soft grunt “Ugh. No sir. See you in class tomorrow.” Waving your hands in front of you as if asking for some kind of forgiveness before turning on your heels, almost tripping over your own two feet, and darting off towards home. Once there you notice the paleness of your skin and the vivid bags under your eyes and the veins of red through the white portion of your eyes. Taking a sniff under your arm you groan. “I should have planned for a shower before I ran to get the print job.” 

The next day you woke up feeling refreshed, a quick shower before you crawled under your sheets and slept like the dead. Stretching and planning for a longer shower you feel like you’re on top of the world with a skip in your step, you’ve got a few hours before you need to head to class. With all the work you’ve been doing you haven’t been taking a lot of time with your personal appearance and you plan to shave your legs and trim a few things. Humming as you flick on your radio and head for the bathroom. 

Feeling clean an hour later after letting the hot water pound into your muscles you feel on top of the world, grabbing your bag and planning to grab yourself a nice iced tea before heading for campus. Skipping along the sideway as you go and open the app on your phone, accidentally hitting the wrong button and opening the one for the print shop near your apartment that you use. 

It’s a good thing you don’t have that drink yet as you freeze looking at the screen. “Version 8.7 printed.” Your heart is starting to race inside your chest as you stare at the version number and try to swallow past the desert that your mouth has become.

Your final version was 8.8.

Jumping into your files and seeing what 8.7 has you groan, ignoring the stare being sent your walk from other patrons walking on the sidewalk. The version you printed has all your editing, all your opening and closing remarks, but it’s missing one massive thing the final version had. 

Your citations aren’t on this version. What you wouldn’t do for the ground to open up and swallow you whole right now because without any citations the paper was useless and you just threw that much of your grade down the toilet. Your shoulders start to heave as a sour taste rises along the back of your tongue, all that work down the drain. Staring at the app and the blinking light asking if you want to print the document you have open. 

Even if you did print it it’s not like you could explain it to him and you know Friday mornings he goes in late to his office after working with his undergraduate students. Pressing the back of your hand to your eyes. 

Wait. 

It’s Friday morning. 

A terrible thought crosses your mind. He’d never have to know as you hit the button to print on your phone with your plan firm in your pretty little head. For a university student, you’d think you’d be a bit more rational. 

You can’t believe how smooth this is going, from printing the correct paper and heading to campus as if you weren’t plotting something nefarious. Even getting into the professor's office had been easy. All you had to do was turn the burnished knob and it opened. You really can’t believe your luck, flipping through his files as you look for your paper in among the stacks. 

Half an hour later you don’t feel as lucky, starting to sweat and you know you have to be coming unglued with your ass up in the air as you flip through the files in his desk. It doesn’t make sense. His office is barely bigger than a broom closet even if the window about three quarters of the way up the wall seems to cast some light into the room. “Where is it!” Your voice is desperate as you know your time is running out. 

“Where.” A gruff voice echos are the space and you feel your heart stop beating inside of your chest. “Is what?” If you thought Professor Wolfwood was gruff before with the tones lacing his words you know you’re about to be thrown out of your class at a minimum. 

“Hi, professor.” You’ve never felt so small before standing up to face him and looking down at the ground, waiting for the screaming to start. 

“Don’t you hi me! What the hell are you doing in my office!” The few steps he has to take sound like the thunder of your death march playing. Holding out your paper for him to take and flinching at the way he snatched the stack from your hand. “Oh, this is just perfect.” Slamming the stack on his desk and making you visibly flinch. “Just another filthy cheat, looking for more time to get her paper done.” Rolling his shoulders as he looks to the sky and you feel even worse as your eyes zoomed in on the way the muscles of his neck seemed to tense up. “Just another one of those goddamn pretty little airheads that think she can get by being a pretty little slut, you like everyone looking at you don’t you.” 

It stings to hear yourself called that, you worked so hard and now it feels like everything is crashing down around your ears and the professor isn’t done. “Here I thought you were one of the good ones, but no, you’ve proven to be as useless as the rest of them. Is there anything you little desperate whore won’t do to come out on top?” Staring up at him as tears start to line your eyes and the professor is towering over you looking down his nose and you feel more wetness forming. “Oh, now you start with the fake tears you pathetic little bitch. I’m going to have you thrown out of this university and see to it you never get into another higher institution for learning ever again.” 

You let out a soft noise as he crowds into you and you try to move back only to have the edge of his desk digging into your back. This close his breath washes over your face and you can smell the tobacco from his last cigarette while the heat from his chest starts to radiate into you. You’re having a hard time comprehending the terror you should be feeling at his words but this close your body is more interested in reacting to his. Now isn’t the time for your body to tell you how you might have a degradation kink. You can even see the white whiskers amongst the hairs on his chin. “Do you have anything to say for yourself?” Grinding his teeth as he finishes his question and you let out a small whimper when his hips brush against yours. 

“I printed the wrong version.” Your voice is more like the wing of a bird on a warm updraft with how low and soft it is. 

“Come again?” For the first time since he came in the bite isn’t in his tone even if his chest is still heaving from his rage. 

“I printed the wrong version.” Raising your voice a little and pulling your phone from your pocket to show the tanned man that was your professor the date and time stamp from the last time you edited the file. 

Taking the phone from you and looking at the information before dragging his hand down his face, making no other motion to move away. His eyes flicker across the screen and you try to hunch more into yourself, feeling something rather stiff between his legs and it’s pressing against you. Biting your lip while his fingers flick along the screen to bring up another page before he lets out a long sigh and you have to do everything in your power not to let out a whimper. This man has to know what an effect he has on some of his students when he makes noises like that and runs his fingers through his hair as if he’s just woken up from a night of fucking someone senseless. 

“You were exhausted yesterday.” Handing your phone back to you and you feel a long exhale pass his lips. Lips that before now you never noticed were chapped and looked oh so kissable. “Why didn’t you just tell me what happened?”

You freeze up again as his hands land on his desk effectively caging you in without even realizing it and you try to move, rubbing your thighs together and you regret the action immediately as your core starts to feel moist. “I didn’t think you’d believe me. After all, I’m just some airhead.” You shrug or try to, hoping throwing his words back at him will get you a little space. The last thing you need is for your professor, your exceptionally hot professor that you are starting to fantasize about bending you over his desk and fucking you like an animal, realizing you want in his pants. 

Groaning and letting his head drop before whispering “I didn’t mean to call you that, you’re one of the brighter students I’ve had in a while.” With his head downward it’s like he finally takes notice of the position the two of you are in, licking his lips and you want to grab his face and suck on the tip of that tongue. “Shit this is an awkward position.” 

“If you want to scream at me some more we could pretend it’s roleplaying.” You blanch as soon as the words pass your lips. That was not a smart goddamn idea. All your earlier attempts at hiding your flushed face and growing arousal are out of the window as your professor raises one of his dark eyebrows in response. 

“I must be more exhausted than I thought because you couldn’t have enjoyed that.” A fraction of a movement of his arm and it brushes against the edge of your shirt making it rise just enough that skin is touching skin. 

Hearing him voice it, you can see the fine lines along his eyes and the barely discernible bags under his eyes. The collar of his shirt has a stain from the sweat from brushing against his neck all day in and out, so vivid compared to when you’re sitting in your chair in the lecture hall. If you had thought you were running on empty yesterday he’s even more past that point. “Maybe.” Licking your lips and taking a chance since you’ve already dug part of a hole for yourself so why not finish it. “It’s obvious you get some enjoyment if your pants are anything to go by.” He’s not hard enough for it to be visible but you are wedged against his crotch and there is no denying what you feel against your core. 

“I have eyes.” The growl that follows the statement is clear and your panties are damp from the steady stream of fluid dripping from you. “I’m as affected by attractive people as much as the next person.” 

The two of you are at a stalemate neither moving away nor closer, you never would have thought being ripped into you would get you so horny but it did and now you want nothing more than to be railed by your sin-inducing theology professor. “If you find me attractive, then why don’t you punish me for being a bad student. I did break into your office and go through your files, how do you know I didn’t change my grade in your records?” Your heart is thumping hard in your chest and you find it a little hard to swallow but there’s a current along your skin and a churning in your gut. 

You don’t need to look down to know his pants have grown tighter, emboldened by his reaction you roll your hips and let out a noise as his firm length rubs along your covered cunt. “Fuck.” A long blink and one of his cheeks are sunk in as if he’s biting the inside of it. A low rumble from him that has your core clenching in response. “If you want this, I want it perfectly clear I'm not having sex with my student. I’m punishing a nosey brat who broke into my office.” His eyes are like jet pools and you can’t help but stare at the way his adams apple seems so prominent along his neck.

“I’d really like to be punished.” Letting your voice drop and moving so you’re flush against him and wrapping your hands around his neck. “Sir.” 

It’s like a switch as his lips crash against yours with enough force to clack your teeth together, one of his rough hands tangled in your hair and pulling your head back so he can dominate your mouth. The taste of cheap cigarettes and a hint of something you don’t know on his tongue as he shoves the muscle into your mouth forcing you to move in tandem with him. His other hand gripping one of your butt cheeks and squeezing the flesh in his wide palm moaning into the kiss. If it could be called a kiss with how domineering it is. 

Grinding his hips into you, you let out a whimper that's lost under his grunts and the sound of his tongue plundering your mouth, he’s hard now and there’s no doubt he’s one well endowed man. Breathless as his mouth pulls away from yours if it wasn’t for his hands on you and his desk behind you, you think you might have slumped to the ground. Letting out a shuddering breath as you try to calm down your racing heart. “Look at you, a desperate pathetic mess.” The hand on your butt sliding to your crotch and rubbing your inner thighs. “Breaking into someone's office and sticking that fine ass of yours in the air like a little bitch in heat.” Tugging on the strands of your hair making you hiss as your eyes roll into the back of your head as his words have you panting for a different reason now. 

“As much as you deserve a harsh punishment we’re short on time.” Slapping your covered cunt and your reeling as he steps back releasing your hair and his fingers are quick to unsnap your pants and shove them down your hips with your underwear. “Filthy slut, you were getting off on rooting around my desk. These skimpy things are drenched.” Shoving two of his thick digits into your core and curling them against your walls. You’re embarrassed about the low keen that you make from the sudden intrusion. “What happened to all that bravado earlier? Just like a pathetic bitch putting on a show until something is inside that desperate hole.” 

In a matter of seconds, he has you flipped around with your chest pressed against the desk and can hear his belt and zipper being undone. “I have something bigger to fill that hole.” Letting out a wordless scream as he splits you open on his cock, only for a hand to slap over your lips. “Such a loud slut.” You moan and whimper beneath his hand as your walls spasm while you try to adjust to his girth stretching you wide open. You’ve never felt so hot in all your life, moaning as he leans over you and it places more pressure against your insides and you’re crushed against his desk. “Now I need you to be quiet, or we might get caught.” 

Sliding his hand away you let out a mewl as your pussy clenches around him like a vice. “Professor.” 

“Nicholas.” Starting to slowly pull out of your tight walls as the spasming slows. “I told you, we’re not fucking as student and professor. You’re a desperate hole I’m going to use after breaking into my office.” The first few thrusts are measured and slow but that doesn’t last once your slick is covering his cock and he glides in your tight cunt. 

You're feeling warm as you pant “Nicholas” his name like a prayer as his hips start to pound away inside of you and you’re seeing stars. Your fingers grip the wood as best as you can, you can’t do anything else with the way he has you positioned, gasping as the weight that had you trapped against the desktop is removed and he starts slamming harder into your core. 

“It makes sense now, you wanted to be punished did you little bitch? To have me rail you and this tight damn cunt of yours.” The sound of flesh slapping against flesh and the wet squeching of your thighs as he fucks so thoroughly you can barely think. “What I’d give to push you to the edge over and over again and hold back, but fuck it’s been a while. Now tell me where you want it because we’re almost out of time.” 

You swallow as your pussy grips him like a vice hearing how close he is, and you know what you want. “Inside. I'm on the pill.” Whining as his hand tangles in your hair once more and tugs your head back hovering at the edge of pain. 

“Greedy little slut, you better keep all my cum in that tight little hole of yours then.” A few more thrusts and you hear him groan long and low as he spills himself inside of you. You don’t even care that you didn’t get to cum yourself as it feels like an impossible amount is pumped inside of you. Mewling at the warmth spreading inside of you.

A nasally exhale above you as you try to catch your breath before one of those rough warm palms slaps your ass before rubbing it. Surprised when he lowers his chest to your back once more and releases your hair to kiss your neck just below your shirt collar. Whimpering as he pulls out, missing the way he filled you already. Those warm hands slid your panties back in place before stepping back and turning you to face him, his eyes on your now covered core and watching as the darkening fabric spreads outwards. You take the time to look between his own legs and feel your eyes grow to plates, he’s thick and the base of his cock has the same salt and pepper pattern as his hair. Damn that man is hung and you lick your lips wanting to have it split you open again. “That’s a very nice dick, Nicholas.” 

A brief laugh before he finishes pulling your pants up and closing them with a pant to your pussy before tucking his softening length back inside his slacks. Digging through his briefcase for a bottle of water and a pack of cigarettes. “Take that and get yourself cleaned up.” Placing one of the white sticks between his teeth and you feel a little jealous. “You look like you’ve been thoroughly fucked and you still need to get to class.” Pushing the window open before flicking his light. “I’d rather we not be seen walking in together.” Turning away from you and you feel a little bit of shame at the fact you just let your professor cum in you like some whore. 

Turning on your heels hoping no one sees you before you get to the bathroom to try and clean yourself up only to hear your name. “Don’t clean up between your legs. I expect to see my cum dripping out of your thighs when I continue your punishment later.” Oh, you are so fucked. Hurried steps taking you out of his office and to the nearest washroom, and when you look in the mirror he is right. You do look like you just had been in the ringer and you didn’t even cum yourself. 

Taking your seat in the lecture hall you’re glad for the water bottle Nicholas gave you, taking a sip and hoping no one looks to closely at you. As much as you had been able to fix your appearance you still feel like if someone looks at you they’ll be able to tell that your shared professor’s cum is still deep in your core with some of the opaque liquid seeping out of you. Walking down the hall it felt like it had been dribbling down your thigh and you were self-conscious as you sat there. For all your fear though, you were equally as excited the flames your tanned professor had brought blazing to life might have been simmering now but the embers still had you warm.

That promise of continuing later had you swimming in a torrent of hormones and emotions, the image of his flaccid dick flashing in your mind and you had to bite your lip. Damn, you wanted to feel him again, have him ravage your insides all while telling you what a slut you were. You didn’t think you were into that before but now? If Nicholas wanted to put a collar on you, strip you naked, and tell you to beg for his cock with your ass up in the air you’d have begged as if your life depended on it.

The slamming of the door near the dais of the hall and you had to hold back the whimper you wanted to let out as Nicholas, no Professor Wolfwoof strode into the space. He looked just a bit more put together than when you had left him but still looked exhausted. Or maybe after being that close to him, you could still see it. “Oh good.” His voice has that low timber to it that your cunt can’t help but quiver as a reaction as he surveys the room. “At least half of you could be bothered to show up. To carry on with our last discussion...” There isn’t any preamble as he launches into the subject just like every other lecture of his you’ve attended for class. 

With your notepad open you do your best to take note of what he’s saying, following the high points he brings up about today's subject. You know you’ll have to read up on it later as his voice is going in one ear and right out the other, the sound of his voice like velvet and you can’t help but rub your thighs together. Trying to gain the smallest relief as your clit throbs and your panties grow damper stuck to your slick skin, more of his seed dribbling from your clenching core. 

Watching him walk and taking notice of the way his broad hands sweep along as he speaks, the same hands that had been squeezing your ass less than an hour ago. Taking another sip of water to try and hide your swallow, because you’d rather feel those hands on your hips once more. 

As his gaze moves across the lecture hall and lands on you, you feel your heart rate skyrocket as the tip of his tongue partially licks his lips. Shifting your thighs once more as another dribble leaves you, and from the way his eyes darken momentarily before moving on you know he’s seen you and how flustered you are. 

The hot asshole smirks, and you wonder if he knows how you feel with his cum slowly dripping from you, making you sticky and oh so horny. 

It’s the worst class you’ve ever had, sitting there suffering your growing arousal and knowing the man responsible for it is carrying on as if nothing is wrong. Or unlike you, he’s far better at hiding it. A soft call of your name has you turning to the person next to you. “Are you alright? You look like you’re flushed or something.” Shit. They look really concerned as they watch your reaction. 

 “Yeah.” Trying to whisper and trailing a hand down the side of your neck. “Just feeling warm. Are you warm?” You can try and play of the heat on your face as maybe starting to just feel a bit under the weather. They shake your head and you give a weak smile. 

“Care to share the conversation with the rest of the class?” Flinching a little as the professor's voice booms across the room and your pussy betrays you with a hard clench that has your abdomen tensing with it. 

“Professor” At least you don’t have to answer as the other student speaks up and says your name. “Doesn’t look all that well. I was asking if she feels ok.” 

As his dark eyes land on you, you scramble, you're just goddamn horny and he knows that. “Apologies Sir. I just feel warm all of a sudden, maybe I’m sitting under a vent or something? Really I’m alright and I do apologize for interrupting your lecture. It was rude.” You hope he sees it as an attempt to deflect away from your current predicament and your stupid body feels warmer as his eyes keep staring at you. 

“It is a little on the warm side in here today. Perhaps you should drink your water or leave instead of being a disruption.” You’ve never been so glad your professor is a dick as half the students in the lecture hall wince at the bite in his words as he goes back to giving his lecture. Taking a larger swig of water before glaring at the classmate who started the problem, you might as well add to the drama by making it seem like you’re upset at having the professor's venom thrown at you. 

Thankfully they don’t say anything else and you make a conscious effort to drink the rest of your water throughout the class. Missing the way the professor's eyes would glance at you when you did, and the subtle tightening of his pants. 

By the end of the three hour lecture, you’re ready to burst from the burning arousal that’s had time to build in you since you had been called out for having a conversation. Every flick of the professor's eyes had you tensing, his voice changing in cadence making your pussy spasm and your clit was throbbing painfully against the sodden fabric. You almost jolted as your classmates hand landed on your shoulder, looking at you a little sheepish as they whispered your name while most of your classmates left through the doors at the back of the atrium. “Are you sure you’re ok? Do you want to go to the clinic or something?” 

“I’m fine.” Rolling your shoulder to try and dislodge their hand. “If I wanted help I’d ask and please don’t touch me.” 

“You don’t need to be a bit-” 

“Pardon the interruption but is there a reason the two of you are still here?” The venom is back in the professor's voice and he’s right beside you watching your interaction with a sneer. 

“No, we were just leaving.” Your classmate still hasn’t removed his hand from you and you snap back, there is no way you’re leaving with them. 

“Are you deaf? Take your hand off me, I don’t need you to walk me out.” Batting his hand away you’re surprised when the professor slips between the two of you. 

“I think it best if you leave.” Coughing slightly and you can tell he’s making a point to let the other students know they will if they know what’s best for them. Snapping your name you flinch. Shit. “You sent me an email saying you needed to discuss something about your paper with me?” 

Stammering out a quick “Yes Sir.” You didn’t think right after class he’d want to continue from earlier or maybe he’s using it as an excuse to make sure the other student does leave.

The lecture hall is silent except for the sound of stomping feet and once that fades you’re surprised once more as the professor walks up the stairs as well, the doors are tucked behind a wall but the sound of them locking rings about the space before he returns. “I’d rather if we aren’t interrupted.” Waving his hand towards the table on the dias that he occasionally uses to display items for one of his lectures you follow behind him. “What’s your experience with BDSM?” 

You almost choke and fall on the steps at how casual he sounds. “Ugh none.” 

“I should be the one apologizing then, earlier I simply took control and you had no mechanism to stop me or put any boundaries in place. I’d like to rectify that if you want to continue with your punishment.” Leaning on the table with his long legs crossed, the action puts his growing bulge on display for you and you swallow. 

“I do. I really do. Every time you looked at me during the lecture I wanted to melt thinking of your dick.” There isn’t a point to lying to him, because it’s the truth. 

“Well darlin', let’s get into the rules.” Launching into an explanation of basic BDSM etiquette and explaining the stop light system to you. You nodded and asked questions of him, and in short order, he had a better understanding of what you felt were subjects you didn’t want to talk about and how far he could push you physically. “Ready to finish your punishment?” 

You give a brief nod “Yes Sir.” Slipping close to his body and groping his cock, the tendons of his neck stand out and you lean in to lick along the straining tissue. 

“I see my desperate little hole with legs is ready for more.” Gripping your hair to use like a handle and tilting your head away from his neck so he can slot his lips over yours. Almost snarling as he does so and your body responds with a low hum as you shake against him, his teeth sinking into your lower lip before swiping his broad tongue over it. “We just started and you’re already losing that false bravado.” Your grip on his dick had loosened but when your whole body is suddenly on fire, well it’s hard to think. “I guess we’ll see if you can at least follow directions, if not I might have to punish you a different way.”

The hand not in your hair is at your pants again, forcing them down your legs and to the floor while his mouth is back on you. His tongue forces its way past your parted lips as he slides his finger along your covered slit, a noise of satisfaction at the way the damp fabric sticks to the rough digit. Your hands flail before landing on his shoulders trying to keep yourself upright and your chest pressed tightly to his at the awkward angle. Rising to your toes as he starts to finger you through the wet cloth of your panties, while his tongue dominates your mouth once more. 

Pulling away harshly he drops with his knees bent and still on his feet so his eyes are level with your covered pussy. Pushing the sodden fabric away from your slit and pressing a single digit inside of you and curling it as he removes it with a wet slurp inspecting it in the light to see the globs of his cum stuck to his fingers with some of your own juices. “Good little slut.” Sticking it in his mouth and sucking it clean with a groan. “Since you can listen and do as you’re told, your punishment won’t be as severe. I’m going to fuck you on this table and let you cum. This time.” Getting you to step out of your pants and Nicholas has you leaning back against the table but not before sliding the flat of his tongue along your folds and smacking his lips as he stands. Grabbing fistfuls of your ass and lifting you into the air so you’re sitting on the cold surface. 

“Pro-Nicholas. It’s cold.” Whining as your body trembles from the difference in temperatures as he works his pants open and lets them drop to the floor. His boxers shoved down his thighs until his cock can bob in the air freely and you can’t help but stare at the large balls hanging from them. 

“You’ll be warm soon, once this dick splits you open again you’ll have nothing to complain about hole.” Slapping your ass harshly as he grinds his teeth giving himself a pump or two. “And that’s Sir right now slut. Consider it your only warning.” 

“Yes Sir.” Moaning as he lines himself up with your messy slit and another hand between your breasts pushing your back again the surface of the table. 

“Remember your colors.” A quick reminder before he slides himself home with a groan, tossing his head back you start to pant like a bitch in heat as your walls welcome his burning length deep inside you again. With the height of the table, the two of you are perfectly aligned for him to slide in and out of your dripping pussy with ease and he sets a rapid pace. “Such a good little whore, you like this don’t you.” His hands on the top of your knees keeping your legs spread open for him as he ruts into you. “Getting fucked in a lecture hall, where anyone could walk in and see.” Your stomach tenses from his words, the voice at the back of your head whispering how the doors are locked drowned out by the idea of someone seeing the two of you like this. What a fucking scandal that would be, the meanest teacher on campus fucking a student like he wants to breed them. “Shit, you do like that.” 

Pulling you more to the edge of the table so he can change the angle and you mewl squirming in his grasp as the head of his cock is rubbing against your G spot. The churning in your gut grows stronger and you can’t help but pant and arch your back. “Sir. I’m gonna cum.” 

“Then touch yourself and cum on this fat dick slut.” You shouldn’t be as turned on by his dirty talk as you are, attributing part of it to the rasp that drips from every word but your fingers are on your clit as soon as he told you to touch yourself. Rubbing them circles over the hard bundle of nerves with the hood pulled back, Nicholas never relents and you’re slumping when your release hits you to the table with a noiseless scream. 

Nicholas grins as he changes his hold on your legs once more but never stops bucking into your supple hole, dragging out your orgasm as long as can. Your tight cunt feels like heaven and he doesn’t remember the last time he got off using his hands, which means it’s been even longer since his cock was surrounded by the warmth of another person. He’d already spilled in you once today and if you let him a second time he was going to blast a load as deep in your cunt as he physically could. 

“Hmmmm, yellow.” 

Stopping the movement of his hips when you utter the color and his hand sweeps along your quaking middle. “Yellow as in you’re approaching your limit, or yellow as in you need a break?” As much as Nicholas wants to keep fucking your tight hole he wants to respect your boundaries. 

“Overstimulated. Need… to… calm down.” As you speak broken words he chuckles, not removing his dick from your core. 

“Alright. Tell me when you want to keep going if you do.” Shifting his hold on you once more so your legs can rest over his arms as you catch your breath. Nicholas can’t help but stop grinning, seeing you split open like that for him. Damn, he could get used to this, you weren’t bad to look at and you had a decent head on your shoulders even if today showed you didn’t always think clearly. Thanking the god of every religion he taught about that you made that mistake or he might not be buried between your thighs right now. 

As you come down from your high with an arm draped over your face you let out a long exhale, moving it enough to see Nicholas looking down at your body like it’s a temple he’s about to worship. You’re struck that you haven’t seen him fully naked yet and it’s something you want badly. “Green.” Your voice is steady as you say the word and you wonder if you can come up with a way to see him again after this. 

“Back to the game.” A few languid thrusts and then he’s back to ramming into you like his sole purpose is to turn you into a puddle on the table. “Now that you’ve had your reward slut, it’s time for your punishment. I’m gonna cum long and hard inside this tight cunt of yours, but only if you beg me for it.” 

“Yes!” It doesn’t matter that you just had your release, a second one is already building from the ashes of the old one and the idea of Nicholas filling you up again has gone straight to your head. A hand slapping your ass and you know you need to actually beg. “Please, Sir! I’m just a desperate hole for your dick! Cum in me! I beg you!” Your voice grows in volume as you plead for him to finish in you, gasping as he pulls your butt to the edge of the table and tossing your legs over one of his shoulders.

“Since you begged my little bitch, I’ll fill you up. Again and again.” Like this, your walls are even tighter and you can’t help but squirm from the pleasure flooding your system as the veins of his cock rub against your insides deliciously. A noise you didn’t even know you could make echoing around the room as he puts his weight on your legs so the head of his cock is almost hitting your cervix. “The next time we fuck.” Panting now as his hips start to stutter, growing close to his second release of the day. “I’m” One hand is pushing the fabric of your shirt up. “Putting” The other is holding your hip in place so you can’t slide back across the table. “You.” The hand under your shirt is starting to knead your breast and you moan. “In” Rough digits push your bra away. “A mating press.” Those same digits squeeze your hard nipple as the hairs at the base of his cock brush your clit and your neck arches as your release slams through you.

Nicholas hisses through his teeth as your pussy squeezes around him as his balls empty his seed inside you once more, the sensation of being milked as more and more cum is drawn from his balls and he can’t help but think of next time. Maybe he’ll fuck you in a bed. Or a shower. Easier clean-up. 

When you return to your senses, Nicholas is still inside of you but you can feel as his member is softening inside your walls and his release is dripping down the globs of your butt. “Nicholas?” His hand that was rubbing your sides under your shirt stills as he lets out a soft noise. 

“Hmm?”

“Can we see each other again?” Licking your lips as you expect him to say he’ll see you every week for the rest of the semester. “Like this, having sex?” 

“Well, I was hoping when you woke up you’d be down for round three. My apartment is two roads over. Or at least follow me there for a shower since I owe you that at least.” Oh, you’ll take him up on both options. Walking out later on unsteady legs and discussing what it means going forward, even if you’re far too focused on the idea of choking on his cock at some point instead of his words. 

After all. He’s hot and you’re down for him and that monster between his legs anytime and anywhere. 

#trigun smut #nicholas d. wolfwood x reader smut #nicholas d. wolfwood smut #nicholas d. wolfwood x reader #nicholas d wolfwood #wolfwood x reader #wolfwood x reader smut #wolfwood smut #trigun #trigun maximum #trimax #tristamp #trigun stampede #trigun maximum smut #trigun stampede smut #trigun 98 #Trigun 98 smut

[apostleofgreed]

It's here, the finale - my friends thoughts throughout Nona the Ninth (it's a long one)

Right which one of these idiots is stuck in Nona's body

Signs point to both

I think more likely Harrow and shes just removed the massive stick up her ass

Most other signs thus far do point to Gideon though- lack of aforementioned stick, finds herself attractive, loves ass jokes, wants to pet dogs (Harrow seems like a don't work with animals or children type)

Also these other kids have names like they're gonna be running in the fucking grand national

Honestly what the fuck is going on with child conception in this series???

Someone has five dads, God was asking if Harrow and Ianthe were being 'safe' sexually and I'm just confused

Okay so I've only listened to half an hour today but if Crown isn't coronabeth I will eat my own arm

My theory is that neither of them are in Harrow's body and that she's being possessed by The Body

Maybe I should follow in Harrow's footsteps and ask you to fucking lobotomize me

No beta we die like Babs

"what do you think is sexy?" "Eating breakfast" Me too, Camilla, me too

Maybe someone needs to lobotomize Judith, has anyone thought of that?

Thing is I feel like I'm supposed to think John is really bad and is the villain here but I just don't

The worst thing he's done is lie to his friends for a few thousand years

Finally, the baddest bitch in all the nine houses (it's Ianthe)

What a power move honestly first she steals Babs' soul now she steals his body, absolutely inspired

She could literally kill another 200 babies to resurrect Harrow and I'd be like what a babe 😍 at this point

I'm bored of shooting can we go back to swords and doing weird things with your body please

I just think it would be great if Harrow could hop back into her body and have a full meltdown about how to function in this world

Erm Corona darling can you please try to stop them bombing your sister in the body of one of your lifelong pals pls and thanks

Y'all better sTOp

Fucking marry, kill, reanimate I can't hahahaha

"that's not actually crown's boyfriend Nona, it's her sister but I don't think anyone could blame you for getting confused" Fair hahahahah so very true

Don't know how they think this is gonna work seeing as though Harrow and Ianthe literally lived together for like over a year and had an interpersonal relationship but ok

Maybe it's because pash has the accent of a rudeboy from Oldham and suffer is weirdly French (on disliking We Suffer and Pash)

Palamades in Ianthe in Babs is sending me west

Abigail died too soon and really she did all the legwork in Harrow

Can't help but feel all of this drama could have been avoided if Harry had just done the job properly in the first place and just let Gideon die properly

All of this just because an 18 year old gave herself the brain scramblies

Cam has just burst into fire wtf

Can't believe Crux hasn't dropped dead tbh

I've got less than an hour left I feel like we're cutting it fine to get Harry back in her body here

Big flex to be waiting for everyone to arrive smoking a ciggie with your golden skeleton arm

Fucking friendship bracelets and a secret handshake hahahahah

Gideon needs to stop being such a bloody himbo

Who has shouted "get in line thou big slut!" Hahahahah

There we have it, the full series. Hope y'all have enjoyed this.

#the locked tomb #tlt #nona the ninth #Nona #ianthe tridentarius #coronabeth tridentarius #harrowhark nonagesimus

[siriannatan]

Float

This one was sitting in my notes for a long time, unfinished, I read it, and I had to finish it.

I just randomly picked Float by Call Me Karizma from Youtube's recommended as the title...

Scott was not having a good time lately. His whole life has been falling down around him and no matter how much he struggled he could not stop it. All he spent so much effort, energy, time and money building crumbled around him.

His fiance left him mere weeks before their wedding. The company he worked so hard climbing the ladder of suddenly announced bankruptcy. Just after he had to take a massive debt to cover all expenses of cancelling a wedding. His ex was all but gone. No sign of him. No excuse. No apology. No help with this mess.

Over the last month, Scott felt more and more like he was in a hole that was slowly filling with water. Chained to the bottom of it. Only able to powerlessly watch the distant clouds over his head.

When he thought things could not get worse he learned his ex took a massive loan from the mafia to pay for the wedding just to run away with the money. And he put Scott down as a guarantor for said loan.

How did Scott find out? When said mafia group came and grabbed him from his new, mostly empty and terrible apartment. "Boss wants to talk about lover boy and when he can start paying back," they said as they pulled him out and into a back car with tinted windows. 

Scott practically forgot how to speak from how afraid and confused he was. Debt? He thought he paid back all his debts but the one. About halfway to their destination, he realised they weren't normal debt collectors but the mob. And felt even worse. It was a miracle he didn't puke.

Once the car stopped Scott was once again dragged. He didn't struggle hoping there was a way out of this. Maybe I'd he explained he wasn't with that guy anymore 'boss' would let him go? No way...

He was prepared for death the moment he was told to kneel on the uncomfortably hard wooden floor. And left to wait under the watch of four guards. As if he could even move with how scared he was.

A cold shiver went down his spine when he heard the door open. He could only stare at the floor, too terrified to look up as someone moved around him. "So, this is that idiots guarantor?" Cold but nevertheless attractive voice mused. "Look up," the voice ordered and Scott forced himself to look up at the source.

He was met with the cold blue eyes of an undoubtedly handsome man in a dark suit. Copper hair gathered in a ponytail at the back of his head as he whispered something to the tall brunet next to him. Those blue eyes didn't leave Scott for one second. Freezing him in place, unable to explain himself as they leveled him with disinterested curiosity. "I made up my mind," the boss smirked, his entire attention back on Scott. "Everyone out," he ordered, "I want to talk to him alone," he added, sitting back. Relaxing in his seat. "Not like he can hurt me in any way," he rolled his eyes as the guards dragged their feet a bit too much for his liking.

Scott watched in fear as all other people left the room leaving him alone with possibly the most dangerous person in the building. And the hottest but that part of his brain should shut up. It was not helping at all.

"Not going to beg I forget the deb?" The man asked lips forming an amused smirk.

"What would it do? You likely already know what you want to do with me..." Scott shrugged. There was no escape. Why else would he send his men away? "I don't know where my ex is. Why he did do it. When..." Scott froze as time man shifted and removed his blazer. Did he not want Scott's blood on it?

"I see," he hummed, eyes glancing away for just a second. "I want a drink, brink me one," he suddenly grinned, pointing to where he glanced with his chin.

Scott scrambled to follow the order. Who else would he be asking? Where he was pointed was an elegant, likely very expensive mini-bar set-up. Glasses for various drinks. Various bottles with expensive labels. "What would you like?" Scott asked even if he'd prefer to run away.

"One Bloody Mary," the man requested as if it were simple to make. 

Scott nodded, feeling his hands shake. How long was it since he was a bartender? College was a long time ago. Luckily he occasionally practiced at home. Nothing as crazy as he was asked now but he used to be able to make a good Mary. With deep focus, he got to work.

He was pretty proud of the result as he brought it to the man on a silver platter. He watched with held breath as the man took a sip to then... 

Spill it over Scott.

"Good enough," he grinned as Scott blinked away shock. Biting his tongue to not snap at the man as he set the now empty glass away. "You're wet. Strip."

Scott could not move for a second. Strip? As in naked. No way... With those cold eyes narrowing he slowly got to it. It beat dying, right?

"The name's fWhip and unfortunately for you, while I tend to avoid human trafficking I like your face so I decided to keep you," the man grinned as Scott fought the urge to curl up and cry. Keep him? Like a pet? "All you have to do is be pretty, stick close to me and be fine with being touched. A lot. Don't worry I'm not the type to share his toys." 

Scott shuddered at his words. Toy. He could feel tears welling up in his eyes as he let his shirt slowly slide down his arms before working on his jeans. At least fWhip didn't mind the slow pace.

"Stop looking like I'm about to kill you, as long as you behave you're very safe," fWhip hummed. His tie was gone and he was slowly opening his dark red undershirt. Scott's breath hitched. He wouldn't... It wasn't part of the... A lot of touching... It absolutely was. He absolutely was about to be fWhip's sex toy. With that realisation, tears started to slowly flow for real. 

fWhip sighed and stood up. "Stop," he said grabbing Scott's chin shockingly gently for how annoyed he looked. "I don't think any got in your eyes... Are you really so scared of me touching you? Fucking you?" He asked, not letting go of Scott's chin.

"Yes..." Scott said with a simple nod being out of the question. 

"Unfortunately, I do not care how you feel about this whole thing," he grinned petting Scott's cheek briefly before returning to his seat. "But be sure that as long as I'm happy with you, no one is allowed to harm you." Scott nodded, thankful that fWhip's hands were off of him. "I'm more of a jealous type, don't like to share, as I said." 

Scott just nodded and hurried to finish undressing. He never felt as naked as with fWhip's eyes taking him once all his clothes were a messy pile on the floor. "How about you make me another drink? Martini perhaps?" fWhip requested, his shirt mostly undone. Comfortably lounging in his seat.

Scott nodded and went back to the bar with the tray and the empty glass and set to make the best martini he could while naked and observed constantly. He focused so much on the drink he missed fWhip stood up and walked up behind him. He froze as he was pushed into the minibar. "Is it done?" fWhip asked, breath tickling Scott's ear and neck.

"Nearly," he managed to choke out.

"Carry on then," he could almost feel fWhip's lips against his ear in that drawn-out whisper.

With shaking hands, Scott finished the drink. He hoped fWhip would back off once it was done. "Grab my blazer and follow me," he said instead, grabbing the drink and quickly leaving Scott's personal space.

Scott really hoped they were as alone as they seemed to be. Not one person was in sight as Scott followed fWhip's leisurely pace through elegantly decorated corridors with hardwood floors and occasional soft carpets. He really hoped fWhip wouldn't keep him naked forever. If he was as jealous as he was saying then he surely wouldn't... Would he?

Eventually, fWhip stopped and opened a door motioning for Scott to walk in first with the so-far untouched drink. What did he even want it for?

"Is there a problem?" fWhip hummed, once more far too close as Scott froze. He was led right to a bedroom. "Keep moving, blazer on any chair," a cold hand pushed him forward.

Scott slowly walked deeper into what had to be fWhip's bedroom. Dark curtains hung ominously around most of a giant bed with dark red bedding. All windows were covered by more heavy curtains. Scott hung the blazer over one of the chairs upholstered with red and black flowers. "Come here," fWhip gave him no time to look about or overthink. Motioning him to a door he missed as he looked for chairs and avoided looking at the bed.

fWhip dragged him to a bathroom of dark tiles and gold details. Fluffy white towels lined one level of the only shelf Scott could see. Next had some bath products and third a mysterious basket. "Bathe," fWhip ordered, setting himself on a stool. 

Scott waited for a second. In case he decided to leave him alone. fWhip stayed in his spot, finally taking a sip of his drink. "Go on, I already see everything anyway," he encouraged with a cruel smirk. Eyes taking in Scott's exposed form. "Everything you need is on the shelf."

Shuddering in shame Scott collected what he needed and brought it to the already filled with warm water massive tub. He'd much prefer the shower but he had a feeling that fWhip wanted him in the tub. And it covered him for at least some time.

"What exactly do you want from me?" Scott asked, his back turned to fWhip. There was no argument against it.

"In general? Make me good drinks, be sexy next to me, and spread those pretty legs when I tell you to," fWhip listed off and stopped. Likely for another sip. "Don't worry you'll be dressed at least most of the time," he added, a voice suddenly close. 

fWhip was indeed right next to the tub, fully shirtless, and insisted on washing Scott's hair. Not that he stopped on just his hair. His hands slid down to Scott's shoulders and his chest. 

Noticing that fWhip had no intention of ceasing to touch him Scott blurted out he was done. Realising too late it likely meant worse things. Like fWhip helping him dry out faster just to drag him to the bed by his wrist.

To his shock, all fWhip did was cuddle him. Naked, yes. But that was it. Could fWhip decide he freaked Scott out enough for one day? When did it get late enough for sleep anyway? It was evening when Scott was pulled out of his apartment. And the ride took a while. And there was the whole thing with fWhip's drinks and everything... It wasn't like he had to decide when he wanted to sleep anymore.

Refusing to overthink it Scott did his best to fall asleep. And shockingly did so rather quickly.

He woke up more rested than he did n a while. About since his fiance vanished... His joy of a nice sleep was quickly gone as he felt lips on the back of his neck what had his eyes snapping. Dark sheets and curtains instantly had him remembering fWhip's cold blue eyes. "Morning, hot stuff," fWhip's voice had his shuddering. Was it memories of it tickling his neck was up to debate.

"Mornin'..." Scott muttered not sure what to do with himself. He tensed up as fWhip got in his last cuddles before pulling Scott to have a shared shower. 

After the shower Scott was presented with clothes for the day. When did fWhip even have time to arrange it?

"I have a few meetings, nothing should go wrong so I'm taking you along," fWhip announced as Scott eyed the white button-up, black, really short shorts, garter belt, knee-high socks and shining oxfords. Was he really supposed to go out like that? With a sigh, he started getting dressed.

"And what would I do if you're suspecting there might be trouble?" Scott asked, he really hoped fWhip would not drag him to dangerous places.

"Well, if trouble is expected I'll leave you at home," fWhip shrugged. It was unfair how well he looked in suits. "Someone will bring your stuff and set you a room for such cases," he added pulling on a dark forest green shirt. Dark grey and green looked annoyingly good on fWhip. But it was nice to know he'd be getting at least some of his stuff. He was not dumb enough to think he'd get all of it.

"Am I allowed to let my family and friends know I'm alive?" slim chance but he might as well ask. fWhip certainly had ways of getting cops to not look for Scott even if someone reported him missing without Scott being involved.

"You're free to do anything as long as you don't try to run away," to Scott's shock fWhip didn't mind.

Scott decided he was done talking to fWhip so he stayed silent. And close to his... what should he call fWhip? Boyfriend? That'd do for now. It beat alternatives. And made the situation sound more sane. Even if he was sticking close to a literal mafia boss... He chose to not think about that element too much. If fWhip was telling the truth then all he had to do was be a clingy, cute boyfriend. Which was honestly, the best that could happen to him in his situation.

fWhip took him to breakfast which was served by staff Scott would expect to see in a high-end restaurant. Not private breakfast area - it was too small to be the proper dining space of fWhip's house - overlooking a lush garden full of mostly all kinds of roses. It was also rather intimate. Scott chose to sit as close to fWhip as he could on the comfy loveseat fWhip chose over the no doubt comparably comfy chairs. A kiss to his jaw told him the other was happy.

"Not so scared today?" fWhip hummed as coffee and tea - as per Scott's request - were served.

"I was rather shocked yesterday, I thought about it a bit and... I guess I don't mind being your boyfriend or whatever you want to call it," Scott found himself only partially lying. He'd need some more thinking to decide if the boyfriend part was true. He certainly didn't mind being safe from any other secret debts his boyfriend put him as guarantor for. He just had to stay on fWhip's good side.

fWhip hummed with a small smirk. Clearly pleased as one of his hands found an exposed part of Scott's thigh and lightly squeezed. "I should get you in a maid outfit sometimes," he hummed as the frankly big for just two breakfasts was served. He was likely trying to shake Scott, to make sure he was not lying to him or something like that.

Too bad for him, when not shaken up and tired Scott could easily play along. "It'd certainly look good in one," he hummed and sipped some tea. He could certainly play along if keeping fWhip happy meant he lived longer.

That seemed to pass the test. As fWhip didn't press too much for the remainder of breakfast. After which Scott was led, fWhip's arm alarmingly low around his hips, to a familiar-looking dark car with dark tinted windows. Apparently business was taking fWhip outside his house. Scott made sure to sit as close to fWhip as seatbelts allowed him.

At the first meeting, with two dangerous-looking blondes - Jimmy and Tango as fWhip called them - Scott made a possibly dangerous decision. He ignored the lack of a seat and just sat in fWhip's lap. Lucky for him it was a good decision as it made everyone else uncomfortable and fWhip visibly happy.

They were out the whole day. Whenever Scott even looked at a storefront fWhip bought - had someone go in and buy - whatever Scott even glanced at. And when Scott even muttered something about being hungry they ended up in the best restaurant in the area with fWhip encouraging him to pick whatever he likes. Was fWhip trying to get Scott to genuinely like him with gifts?

Well. When they were back fWhip was, unlike their first evening in the mood to get to know Scott... closer. And was rather rough in the process. Leaving Scott covered in bites, scratches and bruises. When Scott was sure fWhip just left him to clean himself up he was picked up and gently taken care of. Apparently, fWhip left him to get tea and a warm bath ready. And was more than willing to clean and spoil Scott until he passed out from exhaustion.

And he didn't stop there. No. Scott woke up to breakfast in bed. "Today might be a bit dangerous so you'll be staying home, I can carry you to your room if you'd like," fWhip informed him as he got dressed in an all-black suit. "Someone will bring you all your meals and if you need anything just tell someone and they'll get it," he added as Scott considered how confident he was in his ability to walk after last night.

"Fine, I'll stay at home," Scott pouted. Shocking even himself with how genuinely upset he was fWhip had to go. At least fWhip had the decency to promise he'd be back as soon as possible after he carried Scott the short distance to his room. Amount of guards and other staff present had Scott glad he wrapped himself in a blanket.

A whole day without fWhip was shockingly boring. Scott called his friends and family to assure them he was safe. Just going through some life changes. He avoided giving out too many details just in case. But with that done he had little to do. He reorganised his closet. Bossing fWhip's 'staff' around has provided some amusement.

But by the time the fWhip and his unfairly sexy suit were back, Scott was ready to scream at the 'guards' to tell fWhip he was lonely. At least with fWhip around he wasn't bored. Having hardened criminals scared of him was only fun when he was fWhip's pretty showpiece—not locked in his room.

So of course as soon as fWhip was back Scott jumped him demanding they redo the last night. He did take the offer of it being gentler but after just an hour he was whining and begging for a proper repeat. Who needs gentle when he can have fWhip's tooth marks on him for days after?

#my stuff #my stories #fanfiction #empires smp #empiresshipping #empires fwhip #empires scott #implied smut

[sophiainspace]

How long did you have the idea for and how much plot was ready/sorted out when you started writing "An Honest Thief"?

How I had the idea: I had Covid in October. I was in bed rewatching a big chunk of season 1, and I ended up watching through an Iris-focused lens. How did she feel about the extreme number of people she cared about who lied to her, over months? (They only sort of addressed that in the show - she got mad with Joe and Barry, but forgave them pretty quickly, to my mind.) Then I got to the Snart episodes and of course started thinking about Coldwest and how, if they'd known each other, he wouldn't have lied to her - he'd have been brutally honest, maybe to the point that she would have found it a bit much. And that's where the idea grabbed me.

How much plot was ready: I wrote about 8000 words in a few days, whenever I could sit up.* I drafted everything up to just after Iris finding out who the Flash was...

...and then it became clear this was going to be a fic partly focused on Iris being aro, and I went shit because I didn't feel qualified to write that. Whatever that means - I mean, I don't believe the purity culture nonsense that you can only write a thing if you've lived it, and also I am grey/demiromantic, but I've never thought about that very much - until this fic! So I slowed down in the second half and tried to work out where things would go once Iris knew the truth, and got help from the excellent @achangeinpriorities (who has now looked at many snippets and commented on the aro rep - thanks!), and generally floundered around a lot. This is not how I usually write - I tend to plot out a fic from the beginning, even if things change while writing - so it's been a rollercoaster. I think the tone of the fic has shifted, which might have lost me readers, but I'm having fun and that's what matters.

I did not have a resolution in mind at any point (except I'd planned one final scene with Len and Iris). As you can probably tell by the whole thing with the Coldflash side ship and then Coldwestallen hitting me out of left field (although that's prob not to be resolved until a hypothetical sequel). I thought this thing would have about 5 chapters - it's currently up to 10, with at least one more to go. I've been scrambling around for an ending for weeks, and the perfect one just hit me, the other day. Which is great, as if I write too many more chapters of this thing, I'll lose even more readers than have already stopped bothering with this weird monster of a fic ;)

Which, honestly, I'm not surprised this one hasn't had many readers. The Flash fandom isn't very active now - the remaining fans are mostly Coldflash folks (a ship I like but don't write very well). But post-show tiny fandoms are my favourite place to write fic (hence all my years in the Buffy fandom). You get a few dedicated readers (like you, Toby!), and you lap up all the fic that's still being written, and it all becomes much more friendly than a huge fandom ever could be.

Thank you for the question! 🩶

*Despite being really quite sick, apparently my muse was still very active in churning out fic nonsense. Brains are weird.

Talk Shop Tuesday

#an honest thief #the flash fanfic #coldwest #coldflash #coldwestallen #my fic #iris west #leonard snart

[pinkiepiebones]

One of them Renfield fellas meeting a ghoul? Maybe Mr. Field needs a safe place to stay and the Ministry has open arms ?

Okay first off I read this in, like, the thickest, most typed of stereos Texan voice for some reason??? and it made me put my hands over my face and do a laugh about it, so, um, thank you.

Second,

-~Sometime in the 1980s~-

Renfield was in trouble. He knew that. He had fucked up. He knew that. He had eaten seventeen earthworms, fourteen centipedes, eleven spiders, seven moths, four beetles and a handful of dirt that may or may not have contained ants, and all of their squirmy little souls or spirits or whatever the hell powered them were now powering him as he dragged Master's coffin through the woods. The vampire hunters were still back in town, laying siege to what had been their home for almost a decade. Renfield was sad to see it go, really. He had just gotten his room (well, a storage closet Master allowed him to sleep in) just the way he wanted it. Oh, well. Maybe Master would allow him to have another room at their next residence...

Renfield stopped and dropped the rope he had been pulling. He sat down beside Master's coffin and ran his arm across his forehead, wiping away sweat and leaving a smear of dirt. He flexed his fingers. The power so graciously bestowed upon him by his Master was still flowing. He could keep dragging the coffin all afternoon, find a place to hide Master's coffin for the night while Master hunted, then go back to the town in the daytime to see if he could salvage anything. Yeah. That would work. Only if Master doesn't disembowel me or break my legs or, or call me names because of the siege, Renfield thought distantly.

Orrrr there's a person in these woods and they approach me oh SHIT

Renfield scrambled to his feet and took a defensive stance. The person walked, calmly, and as they got closer Renfield saw horns on their head and some sort of mouthless mask on their face. Weird.

"Look, I've had a long morning, I'd rather not kil-" Renfield squinted. "You... you have hooves? Those aren't boots. Hooves. Huh. Alright." His heightened senses picked up other things, like how quietly this person moved, not crunching a single leaf or twig along the forest floor, and the unmistakable aroma of petrichor and sulfur wafting off them. He shook his head and moved to persuade the approaching person-thing to stop when a voice filled his brain-

//WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE.//

Renfield reeled back. He was used to Master being inside his head , speaking to him. This was a different sensation. This was cold and hot at once, a metallic tingle in the backs of his eyes. It was... Wrong.

He stumbled. The masked person turned it's head, bird-like. It regarded Renfield with eyes so dark no light seemed to touch them. It looked just past Renfield to the coffin he had been dragging.

//YOU SEEK REFUGE. COME WITH ME.//

The person-thing turned and Renfield watched it walk away. It had a tail. Dumbstruck, Renfield gathered up his tow rope and began dragging Master's coffin again, mind buzzing with sleep deprivation and confusion and anxiety. I shouldn't worry, Renfield thought. This guy hasn't got a cross on him. And he's got a tail. And hooves. Huh. Did I eat a venomous centipede?

They walked out of the forest into a clearing. The person-thing leading Renfield stopped and pointed- Renfield's eyes widened at the sight of thick, curved claws- to an eintrely too ominous-looking spired black building ahead of them. Gargoyles that resembled the person-thing stood on the roof.

//THE CHURCH TAKES ALL KINDS.//

"Ah," Renfield started, "well, thanks but no, I haven't been in ages, and my Master is not the church-going sort..." He started to turn around, but the person-thing put a clawed hand on his shoulder.

//THIS IS NOT THAT KIND OF CHURCH.//

"Oh?"

The person gestured to the roof. Several gargoyles jumped down rather gracefully and scurried past Renfield and before he could protest they lifted Master's coffin and headed to the door. The one that had led Renfield motioned for him to follow, and he did, because he went where Master went.

The inside of the church reminded Renfield of Drac- of Master's first home- the high walls, the dizzying stairs, the drapes, the candles... Master's castle didn't have nuns or moving gargoyles or bishops and cardinals in black, however. The people seemed entirely unperturbed by the arrival of a dirty, sweaty, pale man and a large coffin, which was nice. Speaking of the coffin, the gargoyles had carried into a room just off the entry hall. Renfield followed them and found himself in some sort of office- the walls were lined with shelves hewn into the stone, shelves that were all but overflowing with old books. The coffin had been placed on a desk in the center of the room and a befuddled little man in black bishop's robes was arguing with the gargoyles.

"... No, I don't care where you found it! We do not bring strange coffins into the church, especially not into my office! Papa needs this res- Oh," the man straightened a little when he noticed Renfield staring. He had a thin moustache and full, fluffy sideburns. He also had rings around his eyes when made Renfield wonder if he had somehow survived a bout with the plague.

The man waved his hand and the gargoyles filed past Renfield and out the door. "How do you do," the man said in a tired voice. "I am Archbishop Copia, and I do apologise if the ghouls were at all, ah-" he tapped his temple. "It is difficult for most people to listen to them."

"Renfield," Renfield bountly introduced himself. Then he blinked. "I'm sorry, did you say 'ghouls'?"

"Ja, yes. Nameless ghouls from Hell."

Renfield nodded, not understanding.

Archbishop Copia shuffled around his desk, speaking as he went, "Anywho, you and, uh, this-" he gestured to the coffin occupying his desk- "-are welcome to stay here as long as you need, forgive my rudeness but I need to go find Sister Imperator to see about, ah, not having guests in my office..." He stopped in front of Renfield and smiled that tight sort of 'I'd rather not be here right now' smile.

"So, please, have a seat, and we'll get you squared away. Maybe even find a washcloth so you can deal with-" he gestured to his face.

"-this whole situation, here. Eheh."

Archbishop Copia brushed past Renfield, muttering in Swedish as he went.

The bewildered familiar moved to Copia's desk chair and sat down. His power had ebbed fully and he was feeling the burning ache in his shoulders from dragging Master's coffin. He looked around the dimly lit office and noticed several inverted crosses hanging from one of the stone shelves.

Huh. Perhaps Master will like this church.

Renfield placed a loving hand on the lid of his Master's coffin.

There seems to be plenty here to eat, at the very least.

#ghost bc #renfield #the band ghost

[prettypleaseinplnk]

hello my lovely bunny! <3

im so glad you enjoyed reading my last ask- i see it's made you so eager to hear from me again. don't worry, you've made me sooo so eager as well with how needy you sound :)

i love the fact that you have no idea who i am, i wish i could take advantage of that- just show up in the same aisle as you while you're out shopping, not being able to take my eyes off of you as my mind wanders, just wondering how easy it would be to grab you and take you home with me..

this time, i'd lay you on your back, place a bar between your legs to make sure you're spread completely open for me, and tie your hands to the headboard. i'd start softly drawing letters on your clit with the tip of my tongue, spelling out my name and forcing you to guess. i know how desperate you get, but i'd have so much fun watching you nearly cry from how badly you wish i'd just let you fall apart in my mouth. you'd only have a few chances to get it right, so pay close to attention...

but this wandering mind problem you have would make this hard for you, right baby? don't worry, i can fix that for you.. i could smack you, but i don't think my hand is enough- if im going to train you to only focus on the feeling of my tongue edging you to no end, i'll need to replace that pleasure with painful smacks on your already aching clit. aww, did that hurt, my bunny? maybe you can figure out how to pay better attention next time, hm? i'd keep denying you pleasure until you're just a perfect doll with no space in your pretty mind for a single thought. oh how embarrassing, did that sting on your pussy make you more wet? god, seeing you like this would drive me insane.. i'd need to get my fix before i let you finish..

i'd untie you, remove the bar from your legs, sit in a chair across from the bed, and make you crawl to me. you'd look like such a desperate little slut on your hands and knees for me- now let's see how deserving you are. come and taste me, baby- show me how worthy you are with that pretty little mouth of yours.. i can only imagine the needy little moans you'd make and how the vibration would feel on my pussy. i know you'd be so good for me. it wouldn't take long before i'm gripping your hair to push your face down, burying it in my pussy as my body tenses and i cum. you'd clean me up like such a good little bunny, right?

oh it seems like you're dripping all over the floor underneath you- how pathetic, getting all worked up like this from pleasing a stranger.. unfortunately for you my pretty little toy, i think i'd want to see just how long i can keep you yearning for release now.. hours? days? weeks? i know how badly you want to be broken, and im sure this would be a fun way to do it, at least on my end. torturing you would be my favorite, my bunny.

-🫧

Hello 🫧, I’m so glad to hear from you again, that last ask got me so desperate!

Oh how I would love for that to happen..I would love to be out somewhere minding my own business maybe getting groceries or browsing items in a clothing store when suddenly you come up behind me, maybe you’ll grab my hips? cover my mouth with your hand? Whisper into my ear that I know you, and that I was made for this, whilst my brain scrambles to understand and figure out who you are.

I’d love to have you tie me up so I am completely at your mercy, my legs spread open, unable to move and revealing my cunt to you, allowing you to see how wet I am already just from what little you’ve done to me. I think even just having me spread out like that is enough to make me a mindless little doll for you…

And giving me the honour of being between your legs? Wow… I promise I’d be such a good little bunny for you, I’d be so eager to make you feel wonderful and get you to cum>.< So eager to bury myself in your pussy that my face would get absolutely covered in your slick, getting all messy just to please you. Would love to feel your legs shake around me and your pretty cunt pulse as you cum on my tongue it would feel so good, get me so wet and drippy.. it sounds so lovely.

Xx bunny

#bunnys anons #bunnys asks #needy bunny #🫧 anon #lesbian #nsft lesbian #wlw nsft #cnc free use

[surplus-of-sarcasm]

HI would you consider doing a second part to the latest piece you posted? it's so good!! hope you're well :7

Sure!! I'm sorry it's a little late but to give you a reference of how much work I've got, yesterday I stayed up till 4 am doing homework, falling asleep at 5 am. Anyway, I hope you enjoy it ;).

Part 1 Part 3 Part 4

The Eighteenth One, Pt.2

TW: Torture mentions, blood, vomit, refrences to a difficult past

Villain makes their way out of the cell, relocking it again with their fingerprint which is difficult because they need both their hands to keep Hero's unconscious form from tumbling to the ground.

They stomp upstairs, their nemesis's body now slung over one shoulder, and they head straight to Supervillain's office. They knock carefully on the hardwood door and they're met with an exasperated sigh and "For the last time, I told you, Supervillain ca-"

Henchman immediately stops in their tracks, transfixed as they catch notice of their superior's face, one eyebrow raised in mild annoyance.

"I-I'm sorry, Villain. I didn't notice it was you and. . ." they stammer.

Villain cuts them off, raising one hand and then pointing to the door.

They smirk a little to themselves as Henchman scrambles aside to let them through. They were guilty of having a taste for power. It could've come come from the many years they'd spent stripped of control, fighting to scratch out a name for themselves, even if they had nothing but their own nails and teeth.

"Ah, Villain!" Their boss's smile slowly fades as they raise an eyebrow at the sight of the unconscious crime fighter in their arms.

"How did the interrogation go?"

Villain feigns a tired sigh of exasperation. "They won't talk. They're one of those 'moral high ground' types. And they seem to be trained to handle a lot. But definitely not what I've got planned for them."

Supervillain's eyes light up in that creepy, sadistic manner of theirs that had always secretly made Villain uncomfortable. "And what do you have in mind?"

"I've been working on something for a while now. Pain-inducing chemical with very potent effects. I needed a human test subject, and who better to fill this role than lovely, little Hero over here?" They shift the hero's body, so that they're in their arms again, and their stomach twists in knots at the fabricated, sick, twisted smirk that they know is playing on their lips.

"How ingenious! I'd love to see a demonstration." Villain had never seen their superior so nauseatingly excited as whenever someone was about to get hurt.

How could someone have that much of an affinity for pain?

"The thing is, the serum's back home, so I thought it'd be more efficient if all was said and done there." Their heart hammers in their chest, and the air seems to have been knocked out of their lungs, the facade of composure becoming more difficult to keep up.

After a few unbearable seconds, Supervillain nods their confirmation at them. Letting a small, fake grin cross their lips, they make their way out of the office, and let out a quiet sigh of relief.

They don't have time to worry about their sore arms as they drive to their house, Hero laying across the backseat.

They lift them into a bridal carry once more, and the crime-fighter begins to stir in their arms.

"W-whe-re am I?" they slur.

"My place. Supervillain took the bait, and you're in no condition to just be left like that on your own."

Hero nods shakily at them in response.

They insist on cleaning themselves up unassisted, showering and only letting Villain bandage up the wounds they can't reach.

But all of a sudden, Hero grips the doorframe with both of their hands and rushes into the bathroom. They grip the sink tightly with both of their hands and start dry-heaving.

They start to throw up heavily, and it's not just bile, but there's blood mixed in with it too.

Goddamn it.

They don't know what could possibly lead to this. Poison seems like the most likely option. They stand there, almost glued to the floor, their brain seeming to have short-circuited.

Villain peels off the sweater they lent them, now dirty and covered in vomit. They notice their back is covered in dull, ugly lacerations. Which weren't characteristic of Supervillain's prisoners before they even got the chance to be interrogated. Weird.

They place a hand on Hero's upper back, rubbing circles into it with their fingers. They've seen it in movies, and strange as it sounds, it was their only refrence for comforting touches, a seemingly alien concept in Villain's world.

It seems to have reached the desired effect because Hero eases up a little, letting their shoulders fall as the criminal dissolved the tension in them with their touch.

They wash the Hero's face for them. They shift their position so that they're sitting with their back against the bathtub. Villain hands them a glass of water from the kitchen.

"Drink slowly. Don't rush so you don't throw it all up again. Anyway, were you poisoned?"

Hero coughs a little. "Water wasn't clean. Nor enough. But it was this or total dehydration. You know how Supervillain cares that their guests get the best treatment. And I got lavished with extra pampering of course." They let out an inelegant snort, coughing again.

Villain feels an odd tightness rising in their chest. Hero was right. Supervillain had gone further than usual with hurting them.

"Thank you," the crime stopper breathes out, somewhat awkwardly.

"You're welcome."

"Uh, are you alright?" Hero raises a concerned eyebrow.

They must've pulled a face because they catch themselves, quickly settling the muscles of their face into a more neutral, unreadable expression, and almost forcibly relaxing their posture, and they stop fiddling with strands of their long, wavy hair. "I'm fine," they state imperatively, in a tone that leaves no room for futher discussion.

But here they were, all because one hero had spared them. Taking care of them as though they weren't mortal enemies. Could this be a tactic? Would they hurt them once they recovered? Their head burned with questions.

But their mind was in shambles. They'd never had doubts about their, uh, profession, if that's what they could call it. All what they'd been through had eaten away any guilt or remorse for the things they'd done. Sure, Supervillain was a nutcase, but they'd never let that disturb them. They paid well, so they put up with it. But now more than ever, it was starting to get to their head.

Or was this one of those hazy times where black and white overlapped into a grey blur and things weren't so concrete anymore?

#the little gremlin answers #prompt #hero x villain #angst #whump #i hope this thing is good #but I'm enjoying this particular storyline #female writers #writers on tumblr #writing

[wardenred]

Sapphic September 3: 3 AM

Pretty much a free writing exercise, I guess.

The familiar ringtone I haven't heard in six months rips through the silence of my apartment. Shabby, my ancient cat, twitches an ear in her sleep and stretches, pushing the phone off its usual charging place on the edge of my mattress. On the floor, it continues singing the song of the past, and I should really pick it up—the phone, not the call, any wise person would simply ignore the call—but I'm frozen.

"Meow," Shabby says. Her eyes are still closed, but her annoyance is apparent. I nearly fall out of my desk chair as I scramble up, then down on my knees. I stare at the phone screen. The initial followed by a sparkling heart emoji blinks back at me. I remember changing that heart to a broken one on the evening of our oh so amicable break-up, then deciding I was being too dramatic and refusing to save the change.

The song goes on and on, an old melancholy tune with a trace of hope in it. Babe, I'm Gonna Leave You. What did I ever expect, really, with a song like that to serve as our romantic theme? She all but warned me on the very first night when I heard her sing in that dumb karaoke bar for the first time.

Behind the paper-thin wall, a neighbor coughs. I draw a breath. The last two brain cells I possess vote unanimously for tapping Dismiss, and like the fool that I am, I go for Accept instead.

"Yes?" I've got the perfect excuse for my shaky voice, for how long it's taken me to respond. Just look at the time!

"Hey you." She dares to sound just like herself, like all these months of distance have never happened, and I think I'll never breathe again. Consider me dead. "So what are you doing awake at 3 AM for the fifth night in a row?"

"How do you—"

"I can see you online on Discord. And Facebook. And basically everywhere."

Oh. Right. We're still friends on basically everywhere. Messengers, socials, she's on every contact list I have. I'd lie if I said I don't still waste unreasonable chunks of time just staring at her userpic, the same across all of the Internet. A photo I took with a filter she applied. Except I don't see her online all that often, and when I do, it's always with some stupid red status icon. Busy. Away. Do Not Disturb.

"I ran into your friend Maggie tonight," she continues,as if this was a perfectly normal conversation. "She said you’re dating her brother."

"Uh." That's not quite true. John and I have agreed to go on a date. Next week. It hasn't even happened yet. In truth, I'm not sure I want it to happen. Maybe I will conveniently get sick right around Friday evening. Or there might be a food poisoning. Or a sprained ankle. Normally, I prefer excuses focused on last-minute work projects I couldn't say no to, because I have this stupid conviction it makes me look like a responsible adult. Alas, those don't fly so well on the weekends.

"Don't do that," she says. "I don't want you to."

Such a simple request, worded so confidently, like she has any right whatsoever to dictate what happens in my life. The life she's no longer even a part of.

I can't help but laugh at the sheer audacity. Shabby opens one yellow eye and peers at me in such abject displeasure I am forced to reach out and give her all the pats to compensate for the inconvenience.

In a certain light, her eyes look yellow, too, though they never lost their green. Like an autumn lake with golden leaves floating over murky waters, illuminated by the last rays of sunset.

"So?"

"So?.." I repeat after her.

"You won't do that, right?"

"Darling," and I meant to use her name, I swear I meant to, but the usual endearment flows way too easily of my lips. "I don't think you get a say in what I do or don't do any longer."

"Well, no one else is running an intervention, so I kind of have to!"

"What on earth makes you think I need an intervention?!"

"Duh. You own stupid plan? Come on. You don't even like guys most of the time."

"Some of the time I like them just fine," I counter. "And it's John. He's—he's sweet."

"If you ever liked John that way, you would have both gone for it a long time ago.”

He likes me that way, though. He has for a while. And that's why I should feel guilty for how the chances of me getting food poisoning on Friday are plummeting down. I kind of want to go out with John now. Just to give her an excuse to run more interventions.

This is reckless. Twisted. Not like me at all.

All the things she's always brought out in me.

"You won't go, will you?"

"Why are you up at 3 AM on the weekday stalking my socials?"

Neither of us gets an answer we want.

#warden's random scribbles #sapphic september 2023 #sapphicsept2023 #my writing #writers on tumblr #writeblr #original fiction #flash fiction #snippet #3 am feelings

[fuck-customers]

LONG POST

I just saw another post that reminded me of my short but hellish time working at a local family restaurant.

I filled out an application and handed it over in person and the owner called me the next day to start working that night. (🚩#1- no background check, no real interview, just asked if I was over 18, what my availability was and if I'd ever worked in a restaurant before and maybe for my ID, I'm not even sure if he asked for that) Whatever. I was desperate for a job and came in. I was upfront that this was my first job, I had no work experience, especially no restaurant experience but I was ready to try my best and was eager to learn. The owner also informed me to not come through the main restaurant doors where customers come through, to go through the back entrance. (This is relevant later)

I get all of 2 minutes of training (this is not really a red flag, more of a pink one) and set to work. The boss writes down on a pad of paper what time I came in and later writes down what time I left, the other employees do the same thing (🚩) No real/accurate clocking in exists, nor does any actual schedule exist, just the owner verbally saying to come in tomorrow or the next day or whenever at whatever time, but only one shift is notified at a time. (🚩) No one speaks to me, which I originally contributed to them being busy, until I noticed how dead the restaurant was. The only time anyone DOES speak to me, it is to condescendingly tell me how I'm fucking up and usually to yell at me. This not only includes the owner yelling at me, but his nephew who also works there as well as one of the waitresses, both of whom are supposed to be on my same employee level/aka not management. (🚩)

On the first day of work, I explain to the owner that I was looking around to find where dishes go because I have a bad memory due to brain damage and I WILL be able to eventually memorize where everything is supposed to go, it just might take me longer than the average person. He jokes about how he also has a bad memory and to ask anyone there for help, giving me false confidence that he may be understanding. I forgot where some dishes go on the second day and ask him where they go. Instead of helping like he claimed he would, he screams at me because I "can't even remember something so simple" (🚩)

On maybe the 3rd or 4th shift I have, I try to go in through the back as instructed, but the door is locked. I knock on the door and yell for someone to let me in for 5 or so minutes and no one comes. I obviously have no keys to this place I've worked at for 3 days, so I give up and go in through the main restaurant doors. The owner sees me and I immediately start trying to explain about the door being locked and no one answering and he either ignores me or doesn't hear me over his own yelling and is screaming at me in front of my coworkers and the customers eating their meals about how he told me not to come in through the restaurant and to only use the backdoor and refused to listen when I tried to explain that it was LOCKED. (🚩) I am obviously rattled and stressed and embarrassed so I scramble to the back to focus on work so I don't cry. After I contain myself, I get to work and I'm working for maybe 10-20 minutes when the owner stops by my station and asks if I like working there (🚩 I guess??? Wtf kind of question is that, ESPECIALLY after yelling at someone in front of employees and customers?) Of course I lie and say yes and I'm suddenly aware that I'm not currently working and I panic and start washing again. He stops me and says "Get out." "...What?" "Leave. Get out." "...the dishes..?" (in my defense I was very rattled) "I'll have [whatever his nephew's name was] do them. Leave now. You're too slow, I can do these dishes in half the time it takes you. See? *washes a dish* Leave." (side note: the dishes he "washed" and deemed acceptable to be served to customers STILL had food caked on them. 🤮 🚩)

I'm very disoriented and on the verge of tears, so I take off my apron as fast as possible and run out the door to avoid crying in front of everybody, as now the whole goddamn crew has come to watch my humiliation, and call my mom in tears in the parking lot. It's only afterwards, after I've calmed down that I realize that he never paid me (🚩) and I don't even know how much I'm supposed to be paid, since he never told me how much I was supposed to make in an hour (🚩) (yeah that one was on me, but honestly this guy scared me even during the "interview" and I was afraid to ask questions because he was very harsh) My mom (correctly) tells me to go back and demand my pay. The only silver lining in my story is that he doesn't argue against paying me and gives me cash (idk how much it was, but I do remember confirming that it was the correct amount for minimum wage for how many hours I worked)

I worked there less than a week, but it was enough to traumatize me and make me refuse to work in a restaurant setting ever again. There is an overall silver lining: as I recalled this story, I was curious if there were employee reviews and if that guy was also abusive to other employees or if he just had something against me. I didn't find any employee reviews, but I did discover that the restaurant is permanently closed as of 2020. Good fucking riddance. I hope he wasn't as horrible to his other employees as he was to me, but at least he won't be able to abuse them anymore.

[robinette-green]

I AM BITING AND SHAKING YOU OVER THE MOST RECENT CHAPTER OF TWO HUNTERS AND A BLOODSUCKER

The cliff scene oh my godddddddd Solaris is such a dorrrrrrk and I fucking love it just let me smooch him alreadyyyyyyy-

And the way Lucien still obviously harbors feelings (see snuggle scene from previous chapter) but doesn't wanna let them show- ahhHHHHHH

I’m glad you like the story! I’m having a lot of fun writing it!

Writing that scene with Solaris made me smile as I was typing it out. I love my boys so much!!! ❤️❤️❤️

Hopefully I’ll soon be writing cute little things for Lucien too but I need top get them through this hunt and back onto the road.

Purely because I also would like to kiss Solaris (god I wish these guys were real) I changed the story a little… Have some good soup.

(For reference (for the outside observer): The reader has just lost there hold on a cliff face and fallen but Solaris caught them. Solaris is Sun and Lucien is Moon)

"Hi," I said, a little breathless, turning to look at Solaris.

"Goodness. I'd thought you'd never fall for me. Seems today's my lucky day."

Grinning down at me, this man decided this was the perfect moment to say the most cheesy flirts I'd heard in years.

I couldn't help myself.

Laughter bubbled from me as I clung to Solaris in an attempt to not fall again. I wasn't sure if it was because of the frantic scramble to save Leonela and the near-death fall or purely the fact that he had decided now was the perfect time to say something like that, but the whole situation was suddenly hilarious.

And my laughter was contagious. Solaris started to laugh as well. Soon we were clinging to each other, bodies shaking with murth as we tried to stay quiet and not fall to our deaths.

This is not cannon to the story:

Catching my breath, I grinned up at Solaris. Lost in the adrenalin and hilarity, I said

"I fell for you ages ago. This was just a coincidence."

My brain caught up with my words, and my smile dropped. I shouldn't have said that! This was bad.

Solaris's smile left his face, but he didn't look upset. Longing had replaced the murth that had been there moments before.

"I know." He murmured.

I could have had a relationship with this man and his brother if I wasn't a vampire. They would go out and fight dark, evil creatures while I kept the home warm and ready for their return, working in a smithy for some extra money. We would have the summers together, going on adventures or staying home to snuggle up on the couch. Maybe we would even-

My train of thought was smashed. Solaris's warm lips were pressed to mine. I had been so swept up in what-ifs that I hadn't noticed him leaning forward.

I let out a squeak of surprise and pulled back, meeting his eyes... then I leaned in and pressed my lips back to his, my arms sliding around his neck as we melted into each other.

Maybe I could have all those wonderful things with my hunters...

(These two are hanging onto a cliff face several feet above a raging ocean in a storm… perfect place to make out)

#I enjoyed writing that #love my boys so much ❤️ #glitter rock #glitter rock asks #beloved mutuals #two hunters and a bloodsucker #fnaf fanfiction #fnaf fanfic #fnaf sun #sun and moon x reader #fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf moon #vampire reader #vampire hunter au #glitter rock writing

[apoptoses]

"you gotta tell me exactly which part it was that scrambled you, them's just the rules"

OKAY FINE

jk I literally just finished reading and had to run to your inbox ofc

Consensual somnophilia is something I'd never given a lot thought ngl but now that I *have* in the context of these two unhinged freaks, I am obsessed! How the mere sight of Daniel's near unconscious body made Armand feel like a newborn vamp... insane. And Daniel offering himself up to Armand like that even though he wouldn't remember any of it, but the physical evidence of Armand's presence all over his body AND the knowledge of having been ravished by him in such a manner was more than enough jerk off material to last for an entire lifespan. I love this unhinged man sm 🥹

Kink-wise I feel like it had a little of everything? Armand biting his foot, under his arms, his dick (not Armand thinking the blood flowing from Daniel's dick tasted sweeter than the rest of him jfc he absolutely would), and him talking to Daniel through the whole thing was incredible. "Never has he allowed himself to be such a leech" dear god😭

Also loved getting to see Daniel high at the club and Armand wanting to taste the drugs through him (such a Devil's Minion staple, can't ever get enough of it), Armand keeping the bloody bedsheets and taking them to his coffin (WHO's the mordbid romantic now huh???), and him dragging some random blond man into an alley before sunrise because he absolutely needed that release as well... 15/10 I sometimes can't believe you're actually out here blessing us with such incredible work on a regular basis. HOW lucky this fandom is to have you for fucking real, xoxo DA ❤️

Ahhhh dungeon anon!!!

I feel like a broken record saying this because lately every day sucks and I'm having a rough time, but today was bumpy and so reading this really cheered me up!!

Honestly somno evaded me because I couldn't wrap my brain around the appeal of someone being completely asleep for the entirety of an experience. So the only way I could tackle it was via Armand and his sensory stuff, because having no thoughts or reactions to play off would open up so many doors for him and let you really have him do anything.

And I said it a million times in my comment replies but I was worried the horniness of Armand's feelings wouldn't telegraph and like if Daniel enjoying it the morning after would make sense but!! I'm so happy it did!! They're freaks together and like now the door is also open for me to have Daniel ask to be bitten in weird places while he's awake for it.

I also loved making him talk to Daniel's body because at that point he was really just rattling on to hear himself speak lmao But also I think saying out loud what he was about to do allowed him to give himself permission to do it. The vibe would have been so different if he just silently feasted, and honestly I think it would have been one or two bites and then him leaving.

And making him take the bedding as a souvenir!! Idk I just love Armand have gross weirdo trophies from lovers (and actually in my wip I need to finish editing Daniel finally gets a gross weirdo trophy of his own, so hopefully I get that done this week)

but YEAH thank you for messaging about it, and for telling me my work counts ♥ I never really get down on the quality of what I do, just like- I worry about if it means anything. But I guess all creative types are inherently dramatic about that sort of thing lol Still.

It means a lot to get DM'd about my stuff!! ♥ I appreciate YOU!

#apoptoses answers #dungeon anon

[sassasafreeaction]

This might have been rattling around in my brain all day. I may or may not do more with it. I'd at least like to get to some parts with Rick - I mean Crowley. I actually have a lot of other character's plotted out too....

While the Museum of Antiquities wasn’t as comfortable as his bookshop in London, there had always been a certain appeal to higher academia that Aziraphale Fell found himself unable to resist. Even now, when they had him acting as a glorified librarian instead of having him actually translating texts, the original reason why he thought that they had bothered to summon him to Cairo, he couldn’t help feeling like he was on some sort of... adventure. 

“Ignatius Sybilla, St. John the Divine of Patmos, Mother Shipton...” Aziraphale rattled off as he balanced the stack of books in his arms. He shifted them before climbing higher up the ladder to nudge that book between two others, returning it to his rightful home. His glasses shifted down his face as he looked further down his list. “Robert Nixon?” he asked, quirking a brow. “Well, this certainly isn’t where you belong.”

Bouncing the books in his arms again, he glanced around the room, trying to figure out where exactly the Ns were organized. The archives weren’t anything to brag about though, or at least their genuine books and literature weren’t anyway. They had plenty of records, which hadn’t actually been of interest to him. Looking over his shoulder, he realized that the only place left for the Ns to be was directly behind him. He glanced at the distance between him and the other side and ultimately decided that if he stretched himself out just so that he could reach without having to climb down and move the ladder. 

Setting the rest of the stack that had been in his arms on top of the bookcase, he spread himself out across the aisle. The ladder creaked in protest. When that didn’t work, he lifted one foot off the rung. He gained a little more distance, but still not enough to actually reach. Then, all of a sudden, the ladder leaned away from the shelf. Aziraphale shouted in surprise. He dropped the book all together, hands flying forward to balance himself. He had to walk the ladder out toward the middle of the aisle, but he was still standing safely at the top. The only problem being then that it was a long way back down. “Come on, old boy,” he said to himself, carefully shuffling back to his original side. “Steady.... Steady....” 

Aziraphale leaned the ladder forward, but his eyes went wide as he realized immediately that the force of it would be too much. He tumbled into the bookcase, knocking the entire thing down, scattering books and papers and signs everywhere. He scrambled to his feet, forced to watch as the rest of the shelves dominoed down after the first, going around the arch of the room until the final shelf fell on top of the initial one that he had knocked over. He stood for a moment then, too stunned to do much else. 

“Oh, bother,” he murmured then, hearing someone rushing down the hall, probably to figure out what all of the commotion was about.

The curator, Dr. Metatron Jacobi, stepped into the room, having no choice but to go over one of the shelves on his way to him. “Hells bells, Aziraphale. What happened?”

Aziraphale covered his mouth briefly, eyes darting away before he folded his hands neatly and offered him a tight smile. “I um... I was shelving some things and...”

“And what?” he pressed. “I haven’t got all day.” Dr. Jacobi raised a brow, looking less than impressed. 

“I’m terribly sorry.” Aziraphale sunk down, ducking his head so that he didn’t have to look him in the eye. “I’ll clean all of this up. I promise.”

A thought hum and then a nod. “See to it that it gets done then. After all, I hired you to organize my shelves, not destroy them.”

He tucked his lips in for a moment before offering another smile. Aziraphale seemed to reach out and then pull his hand back in. “Um.. actually I believe you hired me on because you needed someone on your staff who could read and write in ancient Egyptian and decipher hieroglyphics...” 

“I hired you because your mother is our finest patron,” he corrected him. “Now, get this cleaned up, and don’t dawdle.” 

“Yes, sir...” Aziraphale murmured, watching him turn around and head back the way he’d come. 

He sighed then, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes. Aziraphale went to put them back on, knowing that he was going to be reading the titles of the books again after he righted the shelves, but he thought he heard some loud shifting from the back room where the museum stored some of its artifacts. 

#good omens #the mummy 1999 #crossovers AUs are my thing apparently #but also this is one of my favorite movies #and Rick and Evie are just Crowley and Aziraphale #I don't know what to tell you #This movie is a cinematic masterpiece