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fbfh · 2 years

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chillax, I got you - JJ maybank x reader smut

word count: 2.3k

genre: SMUT, comfort, fluff at the end

pairing: JJ x afab reader (referred to as "my girl"/girlfriend as petnames)

warnings: reader has a bad fear of bugs (bug type is not specified), JJ is a good boyfriend, descriptions of something akin to anxiety over said bugs, JJ rails the shit out of you to distract you, fingering, praise, nicknames (pretty girl, my girl), "ask nicely to cum", JJ spits into your mouth so that's fun, creampie, begging, aftercare

summary: JJ is a really good boyfriend; he's so sweet, he kills bugs that you hate without you even having to ask, and he fucks you absolutley stupid to distract you when you see one in the middle of the night.

song rec: idk how well it fits but I listened to guy.exe by superfruit the entire time I was writing this and I'm a little sick of it now lol

a/n: this was bc I saw a certian type of bug I l o a t h e a foot away from me like three nights in a row!!! love that for me!!! /s

anyway trying to knock out my wips so I have enough room to write a shit ton of stranger things fics after s4 comes out so wish me luck with that lol

tags: @afidiofobia @justbookworm @yesv01

as with all nsfw works all characters are aged up to 18+!!!

One thing that sucks about living in the Outer Banks is the way your least favorite bug always seems to be practically everywhere year round. Some people hate bugs, and honestly, you’re pretty jealous of those people. You always convince yourself you don’t mind bugs that much, that they won’t freak you out next time you see one, only to end up doing exactly that. From the way you shake and cry and try to fight an anxiety attack every time you so much as see one, you think it’s safe to say you’re well into phobia territory.

The good news in all this is that JJ is not afraid of bugs, and actually loves kicking their asses when one shows up. He hates how upset they make you, and if there’s any way for him to stop that from happening, of course he’s going to. He’s gotten very good at finding them before you do, and getting rid of them before you even knew it was there. The other pogues have even begun pointing out the bugs you hate to JJ so he can get rid of them before you even notice. Ever since he found out how much you hate these bugs, he’s made sure you basically never have to see them.

“Thanks,” you croak, and he pulls you to his chest. He rubs your back reassuringly as you cling onto him tight, trying your hardest to fight back the terror that surrounds you. He kisses your forehead. A moment later, you inch back into your room, JJ at your side. You inspect the walls and windows and bedding under your bright phone flashlight for several minutes until you feel satisfied that there’s nothing of any concern hiding anywhere.

However, on the rare occasion you see one before he does, you really do try to take it in stride. Especially when you find a massive motherfucker six inches above your head at 2am, like today. Even though you’re standing in the other room, shaking and crying, biting your hand, you’re still trying your hardest to stay as calm as you possibly can. A moment later JJ’s in front of you.

“Gone.” he states, voice croaky and thick with sleep. God, he’s so hot. You nod silently. You both know if you say anything you’re going to cry, and you’d really like to avoid that right now. You have shit to do in the morning and you don’t want to lose an hour and a half of sleep just because of a stupid bug, just because your stupid brain won’t stop telling you there’s more of them when you know there’s not. JJ knows this. He knows how bad this is for you. How hard it is to get rid of the paranoid thoughts, how draining it gets.

JJ stands behind you, wrapping his arms around you, nuzzling his face into your neck.

“I know there’s nothing there, I’m just…” you breathe, throat still tight, “so worried…” You’re worried there might be more bugs, worried about having nightmares after this, worried this whole ordeal will consume the bulk of your thoughts for the rest of the day, worried you won’t even be able to get back to sleep. He sways with you in his arms a little, skin warm against yours, breath fanning across your neck and jawline, and he feels you start to relax in his arms. There’s only one thing that can distract you from these distressing fruitless worries, and that’s JJ.

“I know,” he says, voice comforting as he spins you around to face him. There’s only one thing to do on nights like this, and relief and warmth spread across your skin as he begins to press kisses to your neck. He looks at you, with that signature loving, playful gaze of his that seems to melt distress away. He takes in a breath, then sighs.

“I guess I’ll just have to fuck the worries right out of you.”

You feel your cheeks flush, temperature rising on the already warm night as he pulls you closer to his bare chest, hand keeping you securely close on the small of your back. He rubs his thumb across your lips, taking you in for a moment with that signature look of his. God, no one looks at you the way JJ does. Your hands caress his cheeks, gently pulling him in for a kiss, and in the moments before your lips connect, he can see the gratitude and adoration in your eyes. You’re already smiling against his lips, the tides of your mind beginning to turn from impossible ideas that would keep you awake for an hour at least, to your very hot, blonde surfer boy who is currently feeling you up and will keep you up all night, writhing in pleasure.

JJ's lips are warm against yours, and he leans into you, curling your bodies together. His hand moves down, touching you slowly, sending heat through your body, then squeezing your thigh and wrapping it around his waist. Simultaneously, he dips you, causing you both to fall into bed. He kisses you and kisses you, mouth open as you giggle against him. His chest warms with each one of your bubbling laughs, knowing it means you're feeling better, knowing he's doing his job and making sure you're as happy and carefree as possible.

One hand holds the back of your neck, guiding your head and deepening the kiss. The other glides up your torso, caressing the curve of your hips, your waist, easily making its way under your shirt. It soon finds its place on your chest, enthusiastically groping the soft flesh of your tits. He kneads and squeezes, thumb rubbing over your hardened nipple, sending jolts of electricity to your core. Your temperature is already steadily rising at his touch, and you're ready for more.

JJ's ready for more too, rock hard on top of you and pressing into the soft flesh of your thigh. All those cute little moans you’re breathing into his mouth spur him further along, and soon he begins to grind into you slowly. He continues to kiss you, playfully nipping your lips and fucking his tongue into your mouth, murmuring dirty thoughts under his breath. You sigh and moan against him, sounding so pretty and growing increasingly flustered. You can feel yourself getting more turned on by the minute, body growing hot at every rock and bump of his throbbing bulge against your soft dripping heat.

You try your hardest to suppress the breathy sighs and little moans he’s already drawing from you, but he doesn't miss a single one. Every noise you make gets him harder for you, throbbing and humping against you faster. You were never that vocal before you met JJ, but now… god, he has you moaning so fast it’s embarrassing.

"JJ…" you finally moan against his lips, and he can't help himself, finally moving his hand down to toy with your clothed cunt. His mouth moves to your neck, and he grabs your hips, lifting them up to pull down your little sleep shorts and panties. He takes a moment to grope you as he does, savoring the feeling of you humping against his hand. You know how much he loves it when you wear little shorts like that, what it does to him. He plunges his long fingers into your dripping heat, spongy walls seeming to suck him in. He groans into your mouth, anticipating when you’ll soon be wrapped around him, squeezing him tight. You flutter around him as he stretches you out.

“JJ…” you moan again, an unmistakable whine in your voice. Your hands move from his back to tug at his boxers, soft skin brushing against his hips. The feeling of you tugging at his underwear, desperate for his cock while you clench and drip around his fingers is almost too much to bear. You both need him inside you, right now. He retracts his fingers, causing you to whine, fluttering against nothing.

“Easy, pretty girl,” he comforts, shimmying out of his only remaining article of clothing, and you watch, eyes wide, as his cock springs free, red and dripping just for you. He works two fingers back into your burning cunt, scissoring his fingers and stretching you out one last time before lining himself up tantalizingly with your entrance. You're about to start whining, needing his touch more than anything, when he pops the head of his cock inside you. The whine that had been building up falls from your lips as a mewl instead. He joins you, moaning out a breathy chuckle, sighing against your skin. He grabs your thigh, groping you as he works his way deeper inside you.

“Atta girl, just like that,” he coaxes, until he’s finally buried all the way inside you. You sigh, full and satisfied. Heat radiates off his chest, as he starts to roll his hips, fucking you with deep, deliberate strokes.

“There’s my good girl,” he breathes, “takin’ my cock so well, such a good girl for me…”

He continues to pound you into the mattress, hips speeding up when you tug at his hair and drag your nails down his back. One thing you can say for sure about JJ is that he sure knows how to move his hips. He hits every single spot inside you with each thrust, reducing you to a whimpering mess faster than anyone else you’ve ever been with, and he can tell from the fucked out look on your face that you’re enjoying every minute of it.

Before long, he can feel your walls gradually tighten around him, and your eyes are already glazing over. He continues to press hot, open mouthed kisses against you, his tongue fucking into your mouth, muffling your moans and whines. When he pulls away, it’s to ask if you’re close, ask if his pretty girl is gonna cream around his cock. Before he can, you watch, eyes wide, as a strand of spit connects your mouths. You squeeze around him, fixated on the sight. He chuckles, knowing where this is going.

“You gonna cum, pretty girl?” he asks, hot breath panting over your skin, “Huh? You want to be a good girl, cream around my cock?” You nod, eyes squeezed shut, whining with every thrust. Your eyes snap open when he turns your face towards his, a smoldering expression painted over his face.

“Ask nicely.”

The instructions send heat rocking through you.

“Say please…” he tantalizes in a breathy chuckle. Before you can even think, you’re babbling out messy pleads and prayers for him to let you cum.

“P-please, JJ-” you choke out, “cum ‘nside me, fill me up…” you slur in his ear, drunk on his touch. He does not need to be told twice. Your noises, your words, the way you cling to his muscular shoulders and clench around him have him even closer than before. After listening to you continue to beg a satisfactory amount, he chuckles, catching your lips in another hot, open mouthed kiss. But this time as he pulls away, he grabs your jaw, coaxing you to keep your mouth open.

He puckers his lips, letting a glistening bead of spit fall from his mouth into yours. It hits your tongue, tasting like him, and you clench hard, eyes rolling back as you let out a beautiful moan. He grabs your thigh, hiking it over his hip, reaching even deeper inside you. His thrusts become messy as his hand reaches down for your clit. The added sensation has you climaxing in seconds, burying your face in his neck to muffle the torrent of moans and screams of pleasure falling from your beautiful lips. Within moments of your orgasm, JJ reaches his. You’re always pleasantly surprised by how full you feel when he cums inside you, stretching you out like this, and you revel in the feeling.

“F-fuck,” he moans, face contorted with pleasure, “shit…” his hisses. He continues to pound into you until you’ve both thoroughly come down from your highs, and you sigh at the empty feeling when he eventually pulls out, peppering kisses all over your face.

After you catch your breath, you try to get up so you can clean yourself up in the bathroom, but wobble as soon as you stand.

“Woah,” JJ’s right beside you, holding you steady. He glances down the hall, then scoops you up, setting you back down on the bed.

“Stay here, gorgeous,” he punctuates by pressing a warm kiss to your lips. You’re so wrapped up in everything he just made you feel, his taste still on your tongue, that you don’t even hear the thwack from the hallway, where JJ has just gotten rid of yet another one of those buggy motherfuckers you hate.

“Stay the hell away from my girlfriend.” he states to the smudge, before grabbing a couple warm washcloths.

Soon you’re cleaned up, cuddled together with a fan on high. The windows are opened for a little cross breeze, and you can smell the ocean air from here. You should go surfing tomorrow, you want to tell JJ, you know he’d think it’s a great idea. But you can feel yourself slipping into the warm embrace of sleep, safe in his arms.

‘Oh well,’ you think, ‘I’ll just tell him in the morning…’ It’s your last thought before you’re out like a light, and you look forward to it. Waking up next to JJ is your favorite part of the day, and you can’t wait to wake him up by pressing kisses to his sun kissed cheeks.

#jj maybank x reader #jj maybank #outer banks #outer banks x reader #obx #obx x reader #jj maybank smut #outer banks smut #obx smut #also my routine got super fucky wucky for like two weeks so I've been both exhausted AND unable to sleep #so it's been trickier to write lately which i hate for the single reason of i'm addicted to writing fics at this point /lh #so it's annoying that i don't have the brain cells for smth i like #anyway there's way more where this came from #also i'm taking care of myself and stuff so dw babes #make sure you're taking care of youself too <3333 #ily <33333 #admittedly i did get hella dehydrated but I do have my emotional support waterbottle w me rn so that's getting better too #hell yeah working on it!!!!#anyway hope you enjoy this #I wrote half the outline between 2 and like 3am one night when I was so freaked out abt those goddamn bugs #rip me #but yeah I think it turned out well #jj deserves way more love

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lesbiten · 2 years

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life would be so much easier if i could take night time walks without the Fear

#its scary outside!!!!#catch me waking ppl up to go on 3am walks w me because i cant sleep every night #one part of my brain says whats the worst that could happen the other part of my brain says The Answer Is Very Obvious #is my night time walks around campus worth it ...no #im too scared to even go to the basement by myself at night its so scary here #but lying in bed for hours every night unable 2 sleep is NOT doing it for me #simon says

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magicaltimelady44 · 3 months

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In the lead up to starting my new job next week, I'm trying to switch from a night gremlin to a daytime human

I cant reliably get up early yet (migraine this morning not helping) but I can go to bed before midnight now, so....

Progress??

#for reference i usually would go to sleep sometime between 1am and 3am #the problem isnt just that i need to shift my sleep time back #its also the fact that ny migraine meds make me unable to wake before 8hr have passed #and also my natural sleep cycle makes me want 12hr of sleep

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sunfl0wer-witch · 5 months

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#3AM unable to sleep and suddenly remembering I had a drs apt 15 hours ago #and that I technically do not have a dr to refil my meds without this apt #my meds that make me not want to die #and also having learned today that my MIL has cancer #the same kind that killed my auntie who should have been my mom #and kind of wanting to die even tho im not out of meds yet #hahahha #what a great day #night whateever

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queernarchy · 1 year

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my mom: you almost had a fucking breakdown when i told you to order the turkey stuffing the other day hrrbedurrrr look at me i’m allergic to wheat blah blah blah

me, not three days later: ok but what if she actually does like me and I’m misinterpreting it. perhaps… i am the asshole here …

#personal #RIP #my mom: u little bitch you’re abusing me u get that right. u never treat me as an equal #me: fuck maybe i AM abusing her #i simply gotta stop it’s 3am and ive been laying in bed for 2 hours #unable to sleep because i feel guilty about looking at flats and not telling her #i hate this i hate being alive this fucking sucks

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t4rt4gl14 · 1 year

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Genshin men x reader drink among us potion at three am (not clickbait) (gone sexual)

AMONG US POTION. AT 3AM [ 100% REAL!!! ][ 18+ ]

★[ CHILDE. KAVEH. DILUC. THOMA AND ALHAITHAM !!! ]

★ [ fem!reader. dom!reader. handjob. blowjob. edging. overstimulation. praise. degradation. bondage. blindfolding. cockslapping. toys. nipple play. dacryphilia. aphrodisiac. ]

A/N: it been a month :( BUT IM BACKK >:) i got the juice and personally i LOVEEEE this one defo one of my favs <3

for god knows what reason, you had ordered an ‘among us potion’ which in reality was just a red drink laced with aphrodisiac labelled ‘IMPOSTER’. LETS TRY IT AT 3AM!!

CHILDE.

“alright 3AM among us potion challenge!! drink up childe!”, and with that he swallows the aphrodisiac in one go. unbeknownst to him the funny feeling in his pants begin to swell to the point where it’s just obvious he’s horny. cheeks red, breathe heavy whilst his hips are unable to remain still and to make matters worse your teasing doesn’t help either. sliding your palm under his shirt and down his toned body, rubbing the fabric over his hard cock; he whines out however he moans even louder when your hand dips into his sweatpants and slowly jerk his shaft, “mm a-ah hold on! m’sensitive, feels..o-ohhnn!~”, back slowly arching out as your pace increases.

he closes his eyes and basks in the pleasure, while you bend down to suck on his tip and stroke the rest of his thick length, “m’gonna cum! cumminggg! oohh nghhn c-cumming!~”, childe grabs onto your locks pushing your head down further- forcing the rest of his length down your throat as his cum paints the insides of your mouth a gooey white. poor childe he looks so debauched from a single blowjob </333.

KAVEH.

kaveh stayed up all night just so he could participate in this ‘3AM’ challenge with you! such a sweet s/o, even sweeter when the tears of pleasure stream down his pretty face, the tip of his cock a fuzzy red as the cockring continues to vibrate— i mean he has already orgasmed but the aphrodisiac makes him so sensitive!! why not play with him for a while??, “good boy! it’s okay you can cum for me again, shh shh it’s okayy”, your praise is the only thing keeping him sane; whilst he mewls and cries with his body shaking vigorously, “nonono! c-can’t cum again! mmnghh!~ oh my a-archons t-too sensitive p-please!~”

and so, his second orgasm causes him to scream, hips bucking as the cum shoots from his tip, splattering onto his stomach. chest heaving up and down as a means of catching his breathe; kavehs sure he’s just had the best orgasm he’s ever had in his life. he definitely won’t be opposed to this ‘among us potion’ again ;)

DILUC.

now i’m pretty sure dilucs just playing along for your sake of course but at 3AM he desperately wants to sleep however! it all changes when you pass him a mysterious glittery potion, “trust me, it tastes great!”, so he happily drinks until after a few minutes he starts to feel a familiar feeling his abdomen, burning and needy, cock hard and twitching, nipples yearning for touch. being the lovely s/o that you are you immediately begin unbuttoning his pyjamas and pulling down his trousers. pushing him onto the bed; biting hickeys into his skin whilst stroking his cock, soon snaking your tongue to his nipples, you never expected them to be that sensitive! one lick and diluc whines out, “aah!~ h-hey that’s..!~ mmngh! oohhnn.”

diluc cant help but near to the edge when as you continue lapping at nipples although just as he’s about to cum you stop all movement completely! “gonna c-cum..cummi- huh? hey! i-i was so close y/n…”, you simply told him if he wanted his release he would have to beg. this is embarrassing to diluc however he’s too horny to care. “p-please! let me cum! wanna cum so badly please please!!”, since he begged so nicely you stroked his cock till diluc finally spilt his cum all over your hand, whining and mewling all the while. what a sight to behold <333

THOMA.

oh poor thoma, so innocent :( there should be no reason as to why he’s getting punished right now! his cock an angry red as you continuously slap the tip, and with each slap his entire body twitches with a hoarse mewl, pre cum smearing your fingers and substituting as lube whilst stroking his cute dick. he can barely recall previous events all he remembers is a challenge to do with among us at late night?? his back pressed against your chest, you continuously kiss his forehead as he throws his head back onto your shoulder in ecstasy, hips unable to remain still as he spasms from each slap.

and it’s not long before thoma let’s out a guttural moan, eyes widening, back arching and the tight knot in his abdomen snapping loose; “gonna cum gonna cum! cummingcumming cu-MMING ANNGH AA!! ohmnghh!~”, he’s never ever felt so good, that sweet honey pleasure completely washing over him, who knew slapping his cock would deem such a reaction out of him?

ALHAITHAM.

alhaitham took your challenge lightly as he sat there with his book; casually reading about quantum physics whilst you explain the ‘spooky 3AM imposter challenge’, as you can see he is extremely interested in his book so you quickly gave him the potion and watched him read, observing how he slowly lost focus, how his breathing quickened, a tent forming in his pants; suddenly he shut the book and shyly asked for help whilst looking away and who were you to deny?~ alhaitham lies on his back as you gently tie the blindfold and rope around his wrists, slowly stroking his cock, “what a whore, could barely focus on that book of yours..tied up and toyed with like a slut”, a smile creeps onto your face as your degradation causes his cock to twitch. it’s arousing to see the stoic alhaitham moan and mewl out like a bitch in heat.

you decided to tease him with an onahole, lubing the toy up before plunging his cock inside, the squelches that resonate eggs you on to go faster whilst alhaithams lost in the moment, “feels so good! mngh oh please please please!! wa-nna cum!..g-gonna cum!”, and he finally felt bliss; ejaculating into the onahole as his hips buck up. “mmngh cumming! s-so tight..g-god~..”

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ds9season4episode6 · 2 years

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have seen a couple people say similar things and going off of those: characters in barry struggle to get out of their situations, it’s frequently really hard to change yourself/your life in the show and even when things are looking up they are doomed to fall as far again. add to that how it’s a story that has a major theme of domestic violence + relationships repeatedly ending in tragedy and it gets very interesting

#not sure about the phrasing because I watched it at 3am and am up at 4:30 unable to sleep thinking about it lol. lmk if this is nonsense lol #just think that as a theme and a message… there’s a lot going on. there are layers.#and while it was definitely a hard episode to watch for me in some ways (and a hard show in general) I think the complexity of the writing #and the way that while I don’t always know what’s up the people behind the scenes seem to have a very clear vision is just really good #text #speaking #domestic violence mention #barry spoilers #barry

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kakujis · 1 year

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do you love me? 2;

synposis: they wake you up at 3am to ask if you love them. pt 1 here. 3 + 4

warnings: gn!reader, clingy bfs, no set timeline, kazutora's is a lil sad, insecurities, implications of cheating(there is none tho). not proofread!

feat: kakucho, kazutora, izana.

a/n: after i wrote the first part, i wanted to do the same thing but switched! this is the most flowery, fluttery, butterflies searching for a drink type beat drabble i've ever written. i haven't written like this in a while soo i hope it makes sense lol. the tone of kaku's is a lil different because i started his first oops! also big ty to @fuyuluvr for helping me finish izana's bit. ♡

kakucho had never once doubted you, not when you’ve told him he’s the sun and the moon and the reason why the stars gather in the night sky, cheesy words always getting a hot blush on his face. how could he, when you’ve barreled through the doors of your shared apartment to jump into his waiting arms, peppering kisses along his jaw, whines of “i missed you! i missed you!”.

but it’s hard lately when he finds you and rindou with hushed voices at the gym, sitting on a bench, sheepish grins on your faces when he approaches to ask what the two of you have been talking about.

“nothing!” you exclaimed, slipping your phone back into your pocket, scooting farther from the blonde beside you. “i’m gonna head out okay? i’ll see you later.” you exchanged one more glance with rin who nodded to you. kakucho remembers the surprised look on your face, when he pulled you into a particularly tight hug pressing his lips to your forehead, “see you at home,” you said, eyes softened before breaking free and walking out.

he tried his best to not pry throughout his workout, tried his best to not get angry when rindou asked, “you alright?” when he noticed the particularly quick responses that kakucho was throwing at him.

“yeah, i’m fine.” he assured, fighting the urge to accuse his friend of anything nefarious. but man was it hard with this little nail in his heart hammering away at his insecurities and worst fears. maybe it was time to take izana’s advice and “just ask them about it.”

and that’s how he ended up here, sitting awake at 3am listening to the tick of a clock. even in your sleep you clung on to him, drooling and snoring on his arm.

gently, he reaches over to shake your shoulder. the shift made you cling harder, eliciting a whine from your sleepy state. kakucho chuckles, before he shakes a little bit harder, already feeling a little silly at his concerns.

“you awake yet?” he asks when you finally start to blink your eyes and glance up at him.

“hi,” you yawn, using your hand to wipe at your drool, “what time is it?” you prop yourself up, squinting at the clock on the wall.

“like 3am.” he says, unable to hold back the smile on his face as he studies your sleepy expression.

“hmm? why are we awake then?” you yawn again, droopy lids starting to fall again, but kakucho stops you before you’re able to fall asleep.

“wait,” he mutters, pulling you up so that you’re pressed against his chest and facing him. he places his hands on the sides of your cheeks, staring straight into your drowsy eyes. “do you love me?”

the question catches you off guard, you’ve never seen him so serious before. there’s a crease in his brow and his heterochromatic eyes hold something like worry, something that’s scared, as if you’d say no.

you blink off the sleep that once riddled your bones before scowling, “kaku.. what kinda question is that? of course i love you.” you assert, squirming until you’re straddling him. you place your hands on top of his own, prying one down to lace with your fingers. “why?”

he looks away, burning under your gaze, “it’s nothin’,” he mumbles, dropping his other hand from your face. but since you’re fully awake now, the haze of sleep gone, you catch on fast, the wheels in your head rewinding back to earlier that day at the gym.

“ohh,” you hum, removing your hand from his and cupping his face this time so that he’ll look at you. “is this because of earlier? with rindou?”

“maybe..” he says, eyes darting away from yours, “it’s just weird you don’t want me to hear what you two are talking about and it’s also not the first time so...”

you sigh, climbing off of him and reaching over to the nightstand on your side of the bed to grab your phone. settling back next to him, you unlock the screen and click on your messages. you wiggle your phone at him adding, “i’ve got nothing to hide, see?” before you open the texts with rindou:

y/n: HEY

rindou 🙄: hi

y/n: IS PROJECT KAKUCHO STILL A GO??

rindou 🙄: project kakucho???

y/n: dont tell me u forgot… his birthday is coming up!!!

the conversation continues with the plans the two of you had made specifically for kakucho’s birthday, the venue, the people invited, what kind of cake you should get, etc. you scroll slowly, periodically glancing up at your boyfriend as the blush on his face deepens. probably from a mixture of embarrassment and the way every mention of his name has some type of adjective describing how cute he is.

“see? i wanted to surprise you.” you say, beginning to hand the phone over, “you can scroll up even earlier if you want.”

“no, i trust you…” he says before taking your phone and putting it down on the nightstand. “sorry, that was sort of stupid of me.” honestly, he had completely forgotten about the occasion, it was just another day for him.

you shake your head, “well.. i can’t blame you. if i’m thinking about it from your perspective, i’d probably be a little suspicious too.”

he blinks, caught off guard by the way you agreed without a hint of sarcasm. “really?”

you nod, “yup… especially if i didn’t trust my partner, cmon now! rindou?” you tease and he groans out another “sorry.”

“couldn’t you have thought i had a crush on one of your cute friends?” you scoff, crossing your arms.

“rindou is cute though.” he says quickly and matter of fact, not really processing what he’s just said.

“huh?”

“he’s… y’know, he’s good looking.” he repeats, gesturing with his hands and glancing down at you. your face is unreadable as you take in the information, those little gears in your head turning again.

“hm. well, if he’s so good looking then you should totally date him.” you joke, trying your best to keep a straight face.

“that’s not what i meant!” kakucho exclaims, running his hands down his face and you laugh.

“gimme my phone, i’ll set you up.♡” you chime, holding your hand out. “besides i think he’s into you too! totally checks you out at the gym.”

“can you stop?!”

kazutora:

kazutora has an annoying little habit, where he doubts if you really love him, which culminates in late night questioning. you’ve assured him many times before that you don’t mind, you’ll tell him as many times as he wants and you’ll reassure him whenever he’s doubtful, but he hates it. this little worm of insecurity that digs its way through his stomach, his chest, until it makes it up into his brain, shaking and bouncing off it’s walls until he can’t take it anymore.

he hates this feeling, more so because he knows it’s stupid, he knows there’s no reason for it, there’s never been any indication for it and yet, he still cries or lashes out because of it. like maybe he's not that good of a person, maybe he's not what you need, and maybe he'll never be enough. what better time for insecurity to sink it’s fangs in than the dead of night?

he rolls over, cheek squished against the pillow. reaching over to quickly pull you closer to him, back against his chest. you shift a little, rousing out of sleep, tilting your head up towards his with a little curl of a smile. it’s so easy to read him now and pick up on his mood changes, but you think nothing negative, instead feeling warm that sometimes he’s so vulnerable with you, searching for his security like a child looking for their favorite blanket.

“hi tora,” you mumble, voice heavily laced with sleep, “what’s wrong baby?” he doesn’t answer at first, the only response to you being an even tighter squeeze under his muscled arms. you respond back, wriggling under his touch, pressing so far into him it’s as if the two of you are trying to mold together and become one.

“do you love me?” he asks, voice barely louder than a whisper.

“i’ve never loved anything more,” you proclaim and kazutora gives a little needy whine while his hands start to wander up the expanse of your skin and you giggle as his touch tickles you under the sheets.

“you’d pick me every time?” he asks, the heaviness in his heart lightening with each breathy giggle of “that tickles!” but it’s his way of comforting himself, whether it’s running his hands over your bare skin or inserting them into your jacket pockets while he holds you from behind, kazutora finds solace in the warmth of your body.

“mhm! every time, without a doubt! now stop!” you say in between laughs, desperately trying to push his hands off of you but he’s stronger, hands curling into the plush fat of your side and you yelp. “toraa!”

“hmm?” he teases, continuing his relentless assault. but the way you’re kicking and squirming has his hold on you weakening. you’re unable to fully control your movement, thrashing as your elbow flies back, hitting him right in the stomach. “ow, fuck!” he groans, releasing you and rolling over. he grimaces as he places a hand where you hit him, curling inwardly on himself.

out of breath, you roll onto your knees, sitting up while you scoot closer to him. one hand rests on your side, aching from your previous uncontrollable laughter.

“not my fault.” you pant when he glances up at you with puppy dog eyes. “i told you to stop.” you roll your eyes at him, but the pout gracing his face persists and you give in. you bend over, brushing away stray blonde locks from his face before you bend down and give him a kiss. “sorry.”

“s’okay,” he grins, eyes crinkling as he pulls you back down into his embrace. there’s a few minutes of silence, the only noise being the occasional swivel of fabric underneath your feet as readjust every so often. “you really meant it, right?” he asks, breaking through the silence, that pesky little worm still rearing it’s ugly head in his thoughts.

“every word.” you reply, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. you place a finger on his lips as you continue, hoping to dispel the rest of his worries. “in any dimension, in any lifetime. if i could live a thousand lives, i’d pick you every time.”

he blinks before he’s pushing your head down to rest on his chest. there’s no vocal response, instead only the tremble of his body as his grip on you turns crushing, one hand’s fingers intertwined with the tresses of your hair. you realize now that it was due to his embarrassment, a silent plea to just this once, not look at him as his relief spills out as fat, droplet tears that run down his face and onto yours. but it’s okay, you’ve always embraced the rain.

izana:

izana thinks its insane every time you pull at the that strings that hold together his weary heart. but you pluck at them with each call of his name that rolls off your tongue like a siren call, entrancing and pulling him towards you and only you. with those vibrations he seeks you like a moth to a flame, fluttering towards your light and basking in the glow.

heavy and sluggish, he trudges up the stairs to your shared apartment inwardly cursing about how late it is. the plan is to take a shower and get in bed as quietly and quickly as possible. you’re definitely asleep by now, so he tries his best to enter silently, not wanting to wake you. but as he tiptoes into your bedroom, the sight of you asleep huddled under the covers as you hug izana’s pillow has him falling onto the bed, gently taking the pillow from your arms and replacing it with himself.

you scrunch your face as you awaken, heavy lidded eyes blinking and adjusting to the blurry image of izana before you. pretty lavender eyes watch you with a small upturned grin that grows wider at your, “mm?” the chirrup of your voice like the birdsongs in the morning. izana thinks you’re the prettiest melody, better than any song on the radio or classical composition.

“good morning.” he says and you tilt your head quizzically, squinting at the alarm clock on your nightstand, the lull of sleep still beckoning you over.

“it’s 3am, zana,” you whine when you read the red blink of numbers, trying to roll over but he holds you still, arms wrapped around your hips.

he shrugs, a smirk on his face. “and?”

“and i was sleeping.” you mumble, irritation lacing through your voice before frowning and closing your eyes.

the quirk of his grin falls, settling into a line, he’d be lying if he said it didn’t hurt. he knows he came home late and he knows it’s probably annoying to be woken up, yet he was hoping you’d still be excited to see him, to be with him.

“do you love me?” he asks, knowing it’s a dumb question. your reaction is normal, but being around you makes him feel abnormal, and he’s so greedy for everything you’ve got. he thinks you’ll reprimand him again for keeping you awake, but instead you hum when he starts to caress your face, the pad of his thumb running over your skin in airy strokes.

“mhm. i love, love you.” you reply, happily keening up into his touch, pressing your cheek further into his hand.

“say it again,” he says and you open one eye, quirking an eyebrow. you almost say, “really?” but the insecurity dancing in his eyes stops you and you comply.

“i love you.” you say again, a little louder this time.

“again.” he commands.

“izana..” you huff. you know him, this could go on for hours if you gave in.

“just one more time, please?” he pleads hanging onto his last word. he’s never told you, but this is his favorite song, the kind that always gets stuck on replay in his head. the one that he puts on to comfort him when the outside noise of daily life is a little too loud.

“i love you.” you sigh, conceding and punctuating it with a quick peck on his lips and he grins. “happy now?”

he nods, “i’ll never get tired of hearing that.” he presses a kiss to your cheek, letting you settle back into a more comfortable position. you lay with your back to his chest, as he cages you from behind. “now get some sleep, its late.”

you’re quick to look back at him, eye brow raised in disbelief. “you’re literally the one who woke me up?”

“shh, that doesn’t matter, just go to sleep.”

“but-“

“good night, love.” he interrupts, thinking that he should record it the next time you sing him such a pretty number.

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers fluff #tokyo revengers x reader #kakucho #kakucho x reader #kazutora hanemiya #kazutora hanemiya x reader #izana kurokawa #izana kurokawa x reader #pibby writing #this was totally not self indulgent (it was)

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totally-not-a-tickle-blog · 3 months

Note

I saw the requests for fics were open I just need to ask if it's ok to put one in and if it's ok to have an x reader even if platonic bc honestly I'm in a mood lol and I am craving LER ALASTOR idk why and I love your fics and you are a great writer

Author's note: EVERYTHING I NEEDED WAS AN IDEA AND WHEN YOU POSTED THAT ONE PROMPT I WENT

I KNOW WHAT I GOT TO DO NOW.

————————————————————————

"Good night"

Summary: You were struggling to sleep that night, so in defeat, decided to just give up and stay up all night. Sadly for you, Alastor didn't exactly approved your idea.

Warnings: Swearing.

————————————————————————

Bags under your eyes would appear if you didn't go to sleep, and you knew it pretty well. It sucks, really sucks, but laying down on your bed doing nothing and being unable to finally take a good night of sleep sucks the double of those two combined.

As much as the TV wasn't that entertaining, it was enough to keep you awake and slightly less bored.

3AM, still nothing. You took a nap on the couch, but then woke up again. Did you actually took a nap? Or did you brain just turned off? Not sure, not bothered enough to care.

But, suddenly, something else finally got your eyes off of the screen.

"And what are you doing down here so late?"

The sudden voice made you stop on your tracks, jump even, as it came right after hours of silence.

"Jesus fucking Christ Alastor, I almost had a heart attack!" You took a deep breath, calming yourself down. "I'm just watching TV."

Alastor looks to the TV with the corner of his eyes, squeezing them slightly to show his displeasure. "Those things can be quite unhealthy at this time, my dear. Why don't you just turn this off and go to sleep?"

"Because I don't wanna and I can't sleep." You didn't even wanted to sound abrupt, but your filters slowly disappear when you grow more and more tired.

"Now that's just rude." Replied, not offended at all but rather keeping this in his mind for later. "Can't sleep, you say? Well, I have a solution for that." He added with a confident grin.

"...does it include hitting my head onto a wall to knock me out or something?"

Alastor stared at you with a blank face, blinking a few times. "Two solutions."

You rolled your eyes and finally sat, raising an eyebrow. "What solution?"

Alastor lets out a snicker, and with a single snap of his fingers, both of you are back on your room. You fell on your bed a bit too aggressively, but it's not like he cares.

"We only need to get rid of that energy of yours. I'm sure it'll be as easy as pie, you're already almost falling asleep."

"Uh... okay... and what's your plan, exactly?"

Your question made him look at you mischievously, which startled you and already made you let your guard up.

"Alastor-"

But before you could react, something pinched your side right behind you. As you looked, it was one of Alastor's little creatures. Is that a little man? A doll? A little demon? A pet? Whatever this thing is, made you flinch with a single touch.

And just like Alastor could spawn one of those, getting more of them needed the exact same effort.

"What are those??"

"Oh, I never really gave them names, so call them whatever you want. They're also harmless."

Three of them surrounded you, poking your upperbody in different spots while giggling.

"H-Hey! Gehehet off!" They may be weird but also looked weirdly adorable, what made you hesitated on pushing them away. "Thehehey're tick-"

But you stopped yourself right away. It got the other demon's attention, since your fit of giggles was definitely not the cause of the sudden hold up.

"Did you just interrupted yourself?" He asked teasingly, leaning towards you with a more bratty smile.

"Whahahat?! Nohohoho!"

Alastor shrugged, throwing his staff lightly from one hand to another. "If that's the case, I must have misunderstood. After all, there's no reason for you to not say 'tickle'." His head turned back to you, curiously. "Correct?"

As they keep tickling you, you ended up falling on the bed, rolling back and fourth as a poor attempt to escape. "ShuhUHUHUT UP!"

The deer chuckled at your reaction to it. "Oh, I'm not the one who should! Your volume may wake up someone in the hotel."

"Thehehen STOHOP!"

Your words entered his ear and leaved the other, or even worse, didn't even entered in any at the first place, as everything he did was look at his nails.

"I can't, I already promised to help. It is getting you tired after all-"

"FUHUHUHUCK!!"

Your tone suddenly increased in a... huge volume. More than he expected, what startled the guy. Wanting or not, if anyone wakes up he'll end up getting in trouble aswell, so he's thinking twice about his plans.

However, something is off for him. Once you lay down, you didn't got up again nor tried to. It definitely isn't bothering you as much as it looks like, and this fact did not make it worse for himself. More likely to be the opposite, as an encouragement.

The inner conflict was agonizing to keep, and Alastor's eyes show that. With a sigh mixed with a humming, he snaps his fingers, finally sparing you from the shadows.

Your laughter slowly died down, and without realizing, your face shifts to one of disappointment.

"Hah... heh... what..?"

The taller one sits by your side, avoiding visual contact but, for some reason, not the physical one.

Before you could react, Alastor quickly recomposed himself, looking at you with a cheeky grin once again while his own hand touches your stomach.

"It is unfair for me to get punished because of your sensitivity, so I'll try something lighter this time."

The demon's fingers began to scratch, but not hurt, tickling you in a slow yet surprisingly effective way. You grabbed his wrist, but didn't have the courage to take it off as you knew it would come to an end if you did.

Your chuckles, snorts, cackles, any noises you would make, would spread the room as long as he wanted, and the silence would only return once you're finally asleep.

#tickling #tickle #tickle community #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel alastor #x reader #ler!alastor #lee!reader

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greg-montgomery · 10 months

Note

Hi! Sorry for bothering, I have a request if you don't mind, but I have a thing to say too. I downloaded tumbler just a week ago, and I've been in love with everything you've written. Literally, you can't even imagine how much. The dynamics between Hotch and Reader are >>>>>>>, not to mention the Jack-Reader bond, which, honestly, is healing my inner child, lol.

If you have time, of course, and if you wouldn't mind doing that (I really don't wanna bother you) could you write something with this plot?

The team has to share a room for a case, and Hotch had to bring Jack because Jessica couldn't be with him. Hotch, since he was with Jack, had decided to take the room alone, but when Reader asked Emily to room-share, Jack insisted on staying with Reader. Then, you know, there's only one bed... And while Hotch is showering, Reader ends up comforting Jack, and they fall asleep together, cutely. When Hotch cames back, he asks Reader for cuddles.

I'm sorry if that's too long or if you don't wanna write it, it's totally okay, really. Sorry for bothering again <3

hii! i just wanna say you mentioning about 'healing your inner child' really touched my heart. like this is the biggest compliment i could ever get? thank you for telling me! i love you and i hope you like this <333

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

“Are you ready to play uno with me till 3am?” you grinned at Emily, your hand squeezing hers tightly.

Her own grin revealed that her answer would be positive, but she didn’t have the chance to actually reply. A tiny voice rushed to respond on her behalf.

“No!”

Aaron turned to look at his son with a surprised expression, watching him running to you and grabbing your hand that was holding Emily’s.

“Stay with me instead,” he whined. “Please, Y/N!”

It was endearing how attached Jack was to you. Just a few nights of babysitting to help out your boss were enough for the kid to consider you as one of his best friends. And of course the feelings were mutual.

Still, you weren’t sure how to respond. Jack accompanying his dad to a work trip was already unconventional, but the three of you sharing a room? It felt way too intimate for a boss, his kid, and his subordinate.

“Sweetie,” you said, squatting down so you could be face to face. “You’ll be staying with your dad.”

“There’s room for you too!”

You let out a sigh, unable to say no to the kid’s puppy eyes. Your own eyes searched for Aaron’s, finding him staring at your interaction amused. At least he wasn’t mad.

“Only if it doesn’t make you uncomfortable,” he said.

“Oh no, not at all,” you reassured him. Getting up, you took Jack’s hand and walked close to Hotch. “But are you sure you’re not uncomfortable?” you asked him quietly.

“Jack loves you. We’ll be happy to have you.”

“Okay then.” You gave him a sweet smile, and the two of you laughed at the sound of Jack cheering.

“Come here, little man,” you ordered Jack with one eyebrow raised, even though you both knew it was all very much an act.

“You said we’d play uno!”

“No, I said I’d play uno with Emily, who is a grown up and can stay up till late. You mister, should be sleeping already.

He pouted at your words but you wouldn’t have it. “Come here, and I’ll tell you as many bedtime stories as you want.”

“Promise?” he asked, stretching out his arm and raising his little finger.

You hooked yours with his, “Promise.”

Aaron was still in the shower when you and Jack crawled under the covers. You worried about making room for him, since you would all have to share one bed. The situation was so domestic and intimate; it felt as if you were a real family. A part of you wondered if that was the way things were meant to be.

Jack’s little head on your chest, shook the thoughts away and reminded you that there was a bedtime story waiting to be told. So you pulled him even closer to you, and started playing with his hair.

“Once upon a time there was a little country girl. Her mother had a little red riding hood made for her, so everybody called her Little Red Riding Hood…”

You weren’t sure how many stories it took for you and Jack to fall asleep. You hadn’t even realized you had fallen asleep until you felt some movement on the bed, which was Aaron struggling to get just a little bit of your shared blanket.

“Sorry,” you whispered as soon as you were awake enough to figure out what was happening.

“It’s okay. It’s too small for all three of us.”

“Yeah…” you said, feeling almost guilty.

“We should probably move closer so it can cover us better,” he suggested and you couldn’t help but grin.

“Just say you’re jealous and want cuddles too,” you teased him.

“Fine, busted,” he said, obviously not caring that you had found out his true motives. “Now both of you come here.”

He stretched out his arm and you and Jack were snuggled up in his embrace in no time.

#aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #hotch #aaron hotchner #criminal minds #ask #hotch 🪐

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marchsfreakshow · 3 months

Text

Bloodthirsty And Lustful [James Patrick March]

SMUT.

You're a stressed out writer, and came to the cortez, James has been helping you ever since you got here. Now, after a nap, he wants to ask you your deepest desires. Maybe even help you let go.

Warning; this is the most unhinged smut you will ever read from me. This just came out of a dark place in my brain cause of a c.ai chat lol. Thank you to @babygorewhore for being a beta-reader for this <3

Actual warnings!: you like blood. Like, you really like blood. (Reader is really unhinged in this, please bare with) descriptions of organs, bones, skin layers, grinding, switch!reader & switch!JPM, PnV, riding, James lets you take off his neck velvet. Crud smut writing.

18+! MINORS DNI- READ MY SFW WORKS

No one's perspective.

⊹˚.⋆ ₊꒷ᘏᘏ︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹˚ᗢ₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷

James peered through the door to see you sitting on the bed, laptop on your lap, head in hands, and a pair of headphones thrown randomly across the room. You looked a mess, and James was worried you hadn't slept enough. Your novel had to be perfect! You needed to spend every moment writing! Every word needed to be up to standard. It drove you crazy and led you to fall asleep right then and there. Everything came crashing down when your headphones broke while taking them off. Instead of freaking out and crying, you just let out a sigh and threw them across the room.

The man stood there, staring at you while you slept, intently watching every unconscious move your body took. He wondered how on earth that odd device in your lap could cause you such problems. Wasn't it meant to make writing easier? Maybe so, but didn't stop the frustrations of wanting to write the next great American novel. It just worried him, and he kneeled by your side. Seeing how you breathed, how you gently gripped the pillow and your eyebrows furrowed together in frustration. A dream or nightmare of something that has stressed you out.

"James." You whimpered in your sleep. It made the man jump back slightly before he walked to the other side of the bed, sitting by your side. Worries were overtaking your wonderous dream. James wanted nothing more than to kill who was hurting you in your beautiful mind.

The night went on, and you woke up slowly at whatever time. You couldn't tell, and you also didn't care. James was sitting on one of the chairs, occasionally looking over to you. The curtains were always closed, and the door barely stayed open. Lights were on, but dim. Sitting up, you rubbed your eyes, and the figure sitting in the chair was blurry. "Love, you're awake." He mentioned when he saw you sit up. You nodded in response. The ghost motioned you to come over, which you obliged despite not understanding much around you. Leather chairs were never comfortable. You were so comfortable in the bed, thinking about how to write, what to write and the deadline.

"What is it, James? I was so comfortable." Grogginess was the undertone in your voice, and you were unable to keep your eyes open. It felt like 2am or 3am. But what a ravishing man next to you. He sat up properly, posture still incredible even after death. Then you were curling up on the cold, leathery, old chair, hugging yourself.

"Dear...I want to talk to you."

"We can do that in the morning."

"No." His voice almost snapped and was rushed. "No...we're alone at this hour." Typical. The night was his favourite time to talk. Sure some people were still awake, but he knew how silent it was at 3am.

"Fine." You groaned slightly. "What did you want to talk abou-"

"Your desires. Your true wants, and needs." Sudden eye contact intimidated you and your sleepy eyes. Cue fiddling with your necklace, your own blood vial. The small amount of liquid rushed around in the vial, caused by your own finger. You never had anyone to do it with you.

You never said it creepily! All you asked your friends was if they wanted to share a blood vial because it was pretty. No one accepted. So you cut your finger. Your pinky on your non-dominant hand. It hurt, but only for a second. Seeing the blood slowly drip out, and the skin layers opening up so quick, it was invigorating for you. Opened up a deep fantasy, and morbid desire. One no one was ever told about. It was a secret to you, and maybe your stuffed animals. Was it that James was asking you to explore those fantasies with him? Impossible unless he could read minds. A secret fantasy like this always hid itself in the back of your mind, never to be found.

James noticed your darting eyes, your fiddling and laboured breaths. "Darling.." He trailed off, feeling your free hand softly, almost too soft. You felt the ghost-like touches (ha-) and your bloodshot eyes met his.

"James, you're..a murderer."

"...Well, yes. I have indeed told you that fact before. In fact, you were not as shocked as others. Humans are fascinating creatures." He chuckled, seeing the humour in your sentence.

Ah, a sentence that put you on edge. They are. Humans, with their layers, complexity. Humans with their need to have attention on them at all times, to create for others. All of it, it was all in your obsession. "Tell me about your interest my hummingbird. Nothing can be too much for me."

"Can I? Can I really?" You asked with a whisper, a slight glint appearing in your eyes. James nodded, and you immediately let loose. A dam breaking in half to bring in a flood. "Human bodies are so, fascinating." Your instant smile was almost manic like you lost your mind when your interest was mentioned.

"Medical shows seldom get it right. Scrubs does. They do it well."

"Have you, ever seen a body in real life? Not on these shows you mention?" James interjected. He wanted to ask you for details of your sick and morbid love for the dead. To see if his erection would get any harder. The thought of seeing you killing or exploring a body, covered in blood made James want to fall harder for you. Your crazy matched his crazy. Maybe more.

"No. It's...a dream though. Whether someone else cut open the body, or I cut them open...I've always wanted to dig around and feel what the organs feel like, hold a bloody bone in my hand..." You then go to bite my nails nonchalantly like you didn't just confirm your want for a morbid and murdering mind. He stared at you, something in his eyes. A sudden need to murder, and a flame of lust for you. Knowing someone shared his deep desires and could help each other, it made him want you more, But hid it with a breath.

"It's so fucking deranged! but the body is so complex. I want to study the tiny nerves and pick out the bones or organs I'm closest to. Having a fully empty body. Maybe even just having a skin and muscle body. It's just so, interesting." A sly smile reached you and almost made you giggle like a maniac. This sudden insanity made James light up.

"Come here." He beckoned you, and you submissively stood in front of him. But not 3 seconds later did he pull you down onto his lap, holding your waist. Gripping your skin, and nails digging into your sides. One more word from you about your loves, and he would have taken you right then and there. "You are, full of surprises my love."

Feeling him under you, you bit your lip and rested your head by his ear. "I bet your ghostly body is the most interesting. I wonder if there's anything different about a ghost body compared to an alive body." You gave in to what he wanted. He wanted to know everything. Every gory detail that your horrid brain could conjure up. Adding to your warm breaths on his neck, you gently traced around his chest, fiddling with his buttons, but never undoing them. Teasing James to hell and back.

James' breathing hitched slightly, before he took a hold of your face, and brought you close, noses almost touching. "Tell me. What else do you want to explore? Please."

You gazed at his lips before meeting his dark eyes once again, "Everything. I want to explode a heart. Maybe even open up organs, and see what makes a human tick. Take out the muscles, and bend them backwards. And, I want to knock open a skull. See what makes a human live. Unravel the brains, read what goes on." While talking, you occasionally moved your fingers to where you were talking, letting your fingers trace James' head and slicked back hair.

He shuddered as you moved around. Both his imagination and yours going crazy. You felt him twitch under you, and it was only a matter of time until he gave in to his lust. This urged you to carry on talking, to dig deeper into the fantasy that you forbade yourself from thinking about. "James?"

He whined out a "hm?" Eyes closed, and hands gripping onto the chair arms.

"give me a fresh body."

"wh.. what?" He spluttered before moving his hands around your torso. The way your soft skin moved in his hands, mouldable like putty.

"cover me in someone's blood. And let me taste the sweet iron on my tongue." The way you spoke felt sensual, and you ran your hands through his hair, the slicked-back threads being thrown in any and all directions.

It simply drove the man insane.

"Your wish is always my command my sweet bird." He was hungry. He wanted to devour your words while they were being choked out of you. He wanted to hear your cries for murder while he fucked you like nothing else mattered. "What, other things do you wish to see? How much depraved insanity can one handle?" James picked you up and almost threw you onto the bed.

First your shirt went, then your trousers. His clothing came next. "I have such an urge to kill. I want to see the way a human body dies." You sighed. His vest went in one direction, your bra went the other way. "How fire burns the skins and the muscles. I want to see a fresh slash open up the layers of skin. I want it all James."

The cold man on top of you hadn't even penetrated you, yet he felt like he was close to an orgasm. Hearing your insane wants and needs so close to his own. Using your depraved thoughts as a way to get him to fuck you was nothing but insanity. Craziness you could only tell him.

"I want to kill someone whilst you're inside of me. Is that crazy to want?" You confessed in a whisper, on your knees and undoing James' belt.

"Nothing is crazy my hummingbird. I'll happily oblige." He took your chin in his hand, doe eyes meeting his. The pure, slightly innocent look on your face made him closer and closer to bending you over and making you feel heaven. You reached your hand up to his velvet, but he hissed slightly and backed away. "Bunny..." He panted.

"I know it's sensitive, but can I see..it sir?" You asked, pressing kisses closer and closer to the wound that haunted James so. He felt frozen. You wanted to see something so, forbidden. Something he never let anyone see. Something that held a memory.

He took a deep breath before pushing his control back onto you. "My... you want something so...forbidden.." and you nodded intensely. He was only left in his velvet and boxers. Something had to go first, it had to be that dear fabric he wore so closely.

"I won't touch it, I promise. I just, fuck, I want to see neck layers, I want to see what nerves you had to cut for this to happen to you." You knew it was an odd choice, but he nodded after a few minutes of silence. He stiffened up as you reached behind his neck and pulled it off slowly. The man couldn't find words to describe the way he felt. Having someone be so, interested and obsessed with the way he died, almost wanting to have sex with him because of the fantasies they denied.

Your deep breaths felt warm against the cold cut, and you spoke before James had a chance to tell you to stop. "Oh, James. Oh, this cut is magnificent. So many layers..how much blood spilt out..?"

The question threw James off a bit, but nonetheless, he was happy to answer, getting closer to fucking you at every point. "More than you could imagine." He left his fingertips resting under your chin.

The words that left his lips almost tipped you over the edge, and you forced James to lie down on the bed. You were, once again, on top of him. This time, tugging at his boxers, and moving your own underwear to the side. Everything hit you like a freight train and you couldn't hold back anymore. Degenerate, depraved, blood fuelled sex. It was what you needed. To be filled by a killer you wanted to kill with.

Two pairs of hands unable to sort and fix themselves in one place, they had to move, they had to grip, scratch and trace. Two pairs of eyes focusing on eachother, unable to look away from the bloodlust you felt for the other.

It was rough, fast and hard. He moaned out for you louder than he had ever been before. You whimpered his name, desperate for a quick release. There were no other noises other than your lewd moans, until you stopped all of a sudden.

"Darling.." James whined slightly. Eyes slightly erratic, you held his face in your soft hands.

"I need you James. I need you eternally. To see you covered in the deep red of blood." The utmost eroticness of your words almost earned you a 'fuck' escaping from your partner below you.

Almost.

Instead he groaned, slapped his hands to your waist and thrusted upwards over and over. It was careless, but hard. Every thrust hit that perfect spot inside you, letting your eyes nearly disappear up into your head. Moans were practically screams.

The thought of seeing you covered in blood, waiting for him to take you made the man desperate. Everything everyone else couldn't be. He was getting close and even more desperate for both you to come at the same time. It drove you over the edge as you finished faster than expected, and you sort of wrapped your hands around James' neck, then laid down the best you could while he was still inside you. He chuckled darkly and thrust inside of you once more, earning an almost pornagraphic moan from you.

Feeling paralyzed, you adjusted yourself so you were simply just laying ontop of James. Silence was the best sound at that moment, and he kept his hands placed on your waist. "Mine." He smiled against the crook of your neck.

"Especially because of my deranged, bloody thoughts?"

"Especially because of these beautiful thoughts you have."

You supposed James was your murdering partner now, and would help you fulfill the fantasies you desired for. A gentleman, yet a physcopath who used the bodies of those he killed. Everything about him shouldn't be so, handsome and you shouldn't want him the way you do. But a murdering gentleman is someone you couldn't refuse.

⊹˚.⋆ ₊꒷ᘏᘏ︶ଓ︶꒷꒦⊹˚ᗢ₊꒷︶ଓ︶꒷

Tagging;

@fear-is-truth @nahoyasboyfriend @slvt4jamesmarch @taintandviolent @tatelangdonsweater @lvxybby

#ahs #evan peters #american horror story #james patrick march #james march #ahs hotel #smut #jpm #james march x reader #james Patrick march x Reader #james x you #jpm x reader #x reader #jpm smut #james Patrick March smut #evan peters smut #evan peters x reader #im so nervous #pls reblog

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lale-txt · 1 year

Text

🌙 waking up at night without you by their side ↳ w/ Kid, Rayleigh, Denjiro & Yamato

a/n: another draft that's been sitting here since forever. in the light you go!! love me some lighthearted fluff. slightly suggestive + poly mention for Rayleigh (i feel like i'm putting this ALWAYS when writing Rayleigh omg) also sending kisses to all my anons swooning over Yamato. i know i don't write him that much but wanted to include him here for you ♡ i always love reading about your undying love for him, it's the purest thing.

Kid

how dare you leave his side while he’s sleeping

don’t you know about your big spoon duties which involve holding him tenderly from behind, rubbing his back and making sure your arms are constantly wrapped around him all the time?

Kid huffs when he wakes up with his back cold and your side of the bed empty

were you going for a midnight snack without him? didn’t you know that he was also craving shredded cheese at 3am? was your relationship a lie the whole time?

no he’s not being dramatic why do you ask

or did you miss a step of your skin care routine and went back to the bathroom to do it again? he told you countless times that it didn’t work that way…

he throws back the covers and gets up, his red hair a mess and barely held together by the cat ear hairband you once gifted him

Kid’s first instinct when he’s in trouble is to consult Killer so they can be in trouble together, so naturally he stomps down the hall to Killer’s cabin and doesn’t bother knocking, just bursts in like the Kool Aid man

he lets out a surprised gasp when Killer isn’t sleeping peacefully in his bed but playing cards with you, Heat and Wire – very wide awake

before Kid’s face can turn the color of his hair, you already kick out a chair for the tulip and gesture him to sit his ass down so you can explain

“see… on the last island when we stocked up on supplies Killer didn’t buy decaf coffee like ne normally does but regular… and since everyone but you drinks coffee–” “because it’s BAD for your skin, but no one ever listens to me” “–all of us have just been unable to fall asleep.”

Kid rolls his eyes and continues huffing, but also pulls you in his lap and wrap his arm around you, falling asleep with his head resting against yours as you continue your game

but no more coffee for you after 2pm, decaf or not. the big spoon rule book got updated, you gotta keep up duh

Rayleigh

even in his sleep Rayleigh reaches for you, wanting to hug you close to him, only content when he can nuzzle his face in the back of your neck

so when his hand pats into empty space, he’s suddenly awake, mumbling out your name into the dark

first thing he does is turn on the light on the nightstand and reach for his glasses because he can’t see shit without them

still fighting off sleep, he takes a moment to reconstruct last night, smiling over it. no, you definitely fell asleep in his arms after you both finished… several times

actually he could go another round now that he was awake, but someone was missing…

it’s when he hears muffled voices coming from downstairs that he calls out your name again, louder this time

“we’re in the kitchen!”

we? … oh

with his observation haki never failing him, Rayleigh realizes within a heartbeat now what is going on

following your laughter he finds you in the kitchen… accompanied by a very familiar face

“Ray, I must say your taste is exquisite as always…”

Shakky cups your face, a cigarette dangling from her lips, as she beams at her husband leaning in the doorframe

“i think I’m in love with your wife”, you sigh dreamily, melting under her touch and gazing up to her with puppy eyes, completely encharmed by her

Rayleigh ruffles his white hair and just smirks. he was about to introduce you anyway, so this makes things much easier now

he comes closer and places kisses on both of your cheeks. this night just got so much more interesting…

Denjiro

Denjiro is always a little sleepy and would pass out within a heartbeat wherever and whenever, but preferably with you by his side, pulling you close even in his sleep

so why were his arms empty right now?

long blue hair is spilled all over the futons and usually by now you would complain because you’re getting tangled up in it

rubbing his eyes he sits up, he murmurs out your name into the dim light of your shared room

Denjiro isn’t too worried, he knows what you’re capable off, otherwise the yakuza boss wouldn’t have married you. he twists the golden band on his ring finger absentmindedly as he’s slowly forcing himself to wake up properly

it’s when he notices the gentle breeze coming through the open sliding door leading to the veranda and he immediately knows where to look for you

throwing the blanket over his shoulders he gets up, already making out your silhouette in the milky moonlight as you sit there huddled up, looking over your shoulder when you hear his footsteps approaching

“Den… you gotta see this…”

your excited whisper and gestures to keep quiet had him curious, but more than that he was just happy to see you smiling

Denjiro sits down behind you and pulls you in his lap, wrapping his big arms and the blanket around you and kissing the side of your neck. you’re cold but feel warmth tingling in your limbs immediately under his touch

“what is it, little moonshine?”, he whispers and rests his chin on top of your head. you almost disappear in his embrace due the size difference and wiggle yourself in a comfortable position, the tip of your nose and your curious eyes peeking out from the blanket

“snow bunnies”, you say softly and point to the garden where a pair of white bunnies frolic around in the falling snow, almost invisible for the eyes

Denjiro smiles and leans down to kiss you again. love is stored in the little things, you taught him that. and soon he falls asleep again, holding you tightly as he drifts into dreams of you, but none sweeter than the reality he gets to live with you

Yamato

personal space? not in this house

Yamato usually sleeps sprawled out like a starfish and rotates in his sleep like a beyblade

but it’s fine because you adjusted to that! nothing can stop you from cuddling your big golden retriever boyfriend in his sleep

so when he wakes up at night and doesn’t feel your familiar weight on top of him it just sends him into straight up panic

in an attempt to turn the lights on he gets tangled up in the sheets and stumbles, taking down the lamp and everything else on the nightstand with him

he’s calling out your name and trying not to cry on the spot

did you have a bad dream and he didn’t notice? were you somewhere crying on your own? his heart couldn’t take the thought of it.

this was even worse than the one time he lost you at the supermarket in the candy aisle and he had to make an announcement over speaker which was mostly him sobbing into the microphone

his brain still lagging from the sleepiness and shock, Yamato doesn’t notice how you squat down next to him, picking off various nightstand items (tissues, crystals, harness…) off him

“Yams, just what are you doing down there? were you sleepwalking? i knew this would become an issue one day…”

cut to Yamato sobbing in your arms because for three hot minutes he thought he had lost you forever

which is when you kindly explain him that nature called and you only went to the bathroom but would have returned into his arms straight away

however you can never hold back tears as well when you see Yamato crying and now you’re both on the floor sobbing as you hold each other tenderly

only when he kisses away the salty streaks you both calm down a little and can laugh about the situation

ever since you leave a little note out when you have to use the bathroom in the middle of the night and make sure to snuggle extra close to him once you return, making Yamato smile even in his sleep

#eustass kid x reader #rayleigh x reader #denjiro x reader #yamato x reader #one piece x reader #one piece x you #one piece reader insert #yamato #eustass kid #silvers rayleigh #denjiro #one piece imagine #one piece fluff #one piece headcanons

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aphroditesmoon · 10 months

Note

umm, you’re taking Gwen x reader? I have a request. Black cat reader who was best friends with Gwen and Peter but is the rival of Spider woman. Something or another happens and their identity’s get revealed

love it if we made it

gwen stacy x blackcat!reader (gn)

warnings: cursing, tiny angst, gwen's peter is alive here, reader has hair long enough to tie them (only description)

a/n: i rlly hope u like this!

°°°°°

A robbery happened on a Tuesday, 6th July 3AM sharp. A robbery in a golden jewelry store. A minute after that, the Pandora store next to it.

No one cared about the robbery, of course. People were too busy talking about the anonymous donation worth more than 15000 the next day to three different centres in need of them.

Gwen Stacy's mind however, is still stuck at a particular difficult nemesis, the black cat. She's never failed to capture a villain like this, never took this long. But again and again, with time, the annoyingly quick and sneaky cat escapes from her grasps.

It was probably obvious that she wasn't too enthralled by any of the breaking news today, all of them critiquing the infamous Spider-Woman for being unable to get her webs on the villain. Her mind was so full and blurry with different kinds of thoughts that she didn't notice her own best friend walking into class and waving at her.

You took your spot next to Gwen, creaking your chair loudly to get her attention. When she finally flinches out of hee daydream and looks at you, she's met with a knowing smile. "Sleeping? Its not even the first period yet." She shook her head and forced a smile out. "No, just dreading AP maths." You laughed at that. Gwen was good at maths, and all the stupid numbers and figures that came with it, that couldn't have been the reason.

"Well, whatever it is, I need you took a little alive for this gift im about to-" "Gift?" Her eyes brighten up immediately. You grinned at her and pulled out the small paperbag, waving it in front of her.

Gwen, impatient she is, snatches it from you and gets to opening its ribbons open. "It's not even my birthday." She mumbles. "Good, now you can't ask me for anything on your birthday." You settled it, earning a mischievous smirk from her. She knows, you would've given her anything if she'd only asked.

You revel in her suprised expression as she pulls out the golden bracelet, it was a waving design, two long whirling gold around in a circle, with a small blue diamond placed in the middle. "You are insane." She says, glaring your way. "What? Can't treat my girl?" The both if you turn slightly pink with those words. You should've just said your welcome. "The blue reminded me of you. A centerpiece around all the golden whirly shit." She lets out a small laugh, shaking her head. "I love it, thank you." You replied with a nod and your same small smile.

"This must've costed you a lot though, couldn't you have bought me a two dollars friendship bracelet." She joked while putting the gift on her right wrist. "Oh don't worry, I stole it." You say with your usual tone.

Gwen almost backtracked when you said that, before hitting herself awake in her mind, forcing herself to leave the Spider-Woman alter ego aside for today.

You were making a joke because you didn't want her to feel bad, you always did. So she rolled her eyes before repacking the box and the paperbag to put them under her table. "You'd be a shit thief." She concluded. You furrow your brows. "Well then, at least I'd get to see Spider-Woman." You teased while wiggling your brows.

"I wonder how many people became really bad burglars and thieves just to get her autograph." The last of your sentence became muffled ariund the sounds of other students as your teacher finally arrive, but gwen who heard it all to well only smiled at the thought.

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

School finished two hours ago, and neither of you saw or heard from Peter the whole day. He was probably at the lab again, as he always was so you didn't really bother. Gwen, on the other hand, wouldn't stop trying to get him to answer his phone.

She's pacing around the room with her phone speaker on while you're laying on her bed, messing with her giant flower shaped plushie while she loses her mind. "Maybe he left his phone at home." You reasoned. Gwen shool her head and kept trying. "He always lose his damn phone."

You frowned at her and decided you were done waiting. "Gwen, its over 10pm, I need to get back home, my dad will be worried." You say before getting up and taking your jacket from her coat hanger. "When has your dad ever even noticed if you're gone." She snaps, phone thrown on her bed in frustration.

Your eyes widen at the words and you scoff at her. She opened her mouth to apologize, immediately getting cut off. "Look, I don't know what spider has crawled up your ass these days, but we both know Peter's always disappearing these days, he's probably fine, and I'm going home since you're so worried over your friend that isn't in front of you." You ended the conversating as soon as it started, not giving her a chance to respond, you left her room, banging the door.

Your house was a few blocks away from Gwen's. When you're sure no one's around, you climb up quickly inti your room by the window, hands fast, some help from your claws. Tossing your backpack onto your bed, you changed into your suit without wasting time.

Gwen was right about something, your dad has long since noticed if you ever even came home these days. You jumped back out of your window, swinging upwards onto the roof instead of the streets.

You hopped from building to building, taking your time while enjoying the view. The lights. They were beautiful tonight, accompanied by the bright moon, staring down from above. Even the neon signs of Joe's Pizza seemed pleasant to look at in times like this. You wished you could've shared these kind of moments with Gwen, but you didn't want to think of her now.

You find a spot above a tall empty building, where the ciry lights seemed clearer, and the smell of trash and dog piss was further away. Pulling your hair up in a bun, you tied it over twice, fixing it so you'll be able to see better without your hair always on your face.

And what a fate, as you're tilting your head down whilst your hands fixes the hairtie, a robbery happens right in front of your eyes.

Your heart skipped a beat at the crime, until you remembered you were also a criminal of a sort. This was interesting to see. A crime done by someone other than the Black Cat, finally.

The pleasure was shortlasting though, when you had realized who was getting robbed. It was Peter. The masked man pulled out his gun, aiming it to Peter's face when he tried to run. "Run, and I'll shoot." His voice a mumble from below.

You move to stand up, backing away from any visibility, tiptoeing until you've reached the end of the building and hopped off, landing on your feet.

When you walked over the building to stand behind the robber, Peter's eyes involuntary widen, as if a warning towards another civillian. But you weren't a civilian, and when he takes in tbe suit and the masks, he realized who you were.

The robber gets annoyed when his eyes weren't on him anymore. "What the hell are y-" he spuns around towards you, receiving a kick to his stomach, making him fall on his back on the blow. You smiled at the victory watching Peter look between you and the fallen robber in confusion.

It seemed your victory didn't last long when a sling if webs shot againts your face.

You wretched the sticky web out of your face, growling in disgust. "Robbing an innocent citizen? That's low, even for you kitty." The annoying voice spoke. Once you manage tu cut the webs off fully with your claws. Regaining your vision, you sneer at the ghost-spider, standing in front of Peter, who's finding protection behind her. "Is being blind apart of being spider-woman? I didn't rob him, I saved him." The hero's eyes squint along with her mask. "You? Saving people?"

Your eyes actually widen in offense before looking towards Peter. "Tell her doofus! I literally kicked him for you."

Gwen swings her head back at him and he stutters in panic. "Wh-I mean, yeah, she did, technically...kick him." You fold your eyes and glare at her as she turns back at you. "See?" The two of you lock eyes for a minute long before she finally speak. "Peter Parker-" She calls him.

Both you and Peter frown at the name dropping . "-go home. I'll deal with her." The boy doesn't hesitate, turning his back and running way.

You snorted at her words. Always a show off. "You'll deal with me? How?" She tilts her head. "Like this." When you saw herbhand moving up, you move faster than her, snatching up her wrists in a tight grip as you push her againts the wall. "I might not have any venom on me, but try that again spidey, and I'll make you'll feel these claws for days." You see her physically wince at the words.

"You think just because you saved one man, that erases the 166 crimes you've done?" She asks sarcastically. You pout and pretends to think. "I think, I really don't give a fuck, but its nice of you to remember all of my crimes, definitely not weird and obsessive or anything."

She tries to speak again but you shush her when your eyes bore into the bracelet on her wrist. Firstly, who is stupid enough to wear their jewelry outside of their suit? Its like they're begging to be robbed. Secondly; "Where did you get that bracelet?"

Your nemesis lets out a 'huh?' You repeat yourself, sterner. "I bought it?" You scoff. "You couldn't have bought something I've robbed." She seems annoyed by your questions. Being accused of stealing by a thief is pretty hurtful. "I could've brought it before you robbed it, you know."

You hummed thoughtfully at her words before you spoke. "You could've, or-" Your grip on her loosens, "-We're both just really, really, stupid." Gwen cocks her head in confusion. "What the hell are y-" realization hit her then. "Oh my god, no."

"No? Are you sure, Gwen stacy?" She winced at the mention of her name. Her hands move towards your mask. "How did I never..." Her words trails off a second before loud voices of people coming your way was heard. You pull her back swiftly into an alley, putting yourself between her and the open space.

The both of you lean yourselves againts the wall, you feel her fingers slowly slips into yours and holds back a tired sigh.

Once the group of kids has passed the alley, you finally relaxed. Her hands try to pull aw

ay but you curl your own fists around it.

She spins you back to her and her free hand moves to graze over your mask. "I didn't want you or Peter to be involved like this." She murmed. Your own hand slids around her waste as you lean closer. "I don't think it's up to you, Gwen." She huffs. "You know what I mean." You say nothing, eye staring down at your intertwined fingers.

"Are you still going to get me arrested, spidey?" You could feel her glare from inside the mask. "What? Because I'm your friend, it all changes now?" You honestly ask. "Because I love you, and I know you and your heart, is why it's all different now. You're not who I thought you were, you can't be, the Black Cat I've thought of before was evil in my head, evil and cruel."

You say nothing, waiting for her to continue. "You're not evil, and you're not cruel." You raised a brow. "Then, what am I?" She's hesitates. "You're, with me. And I'm not going to let them take you, not anymore, whoever your secret identity is." Your mouth remains shut at that.

All the bad jokes and sarcastic comments dies on your throat. But your stubornnes always wins, "You didn't really seem to care much about me this evening."

Gwen groans loudly. "Come on, we'll go back to my place, I won't even look at the ground on the way home to shown you how much I'm paying attention to you now." You snort, a smile escaping you despite your efforts to remain upset at her.

#gwen stacy x reader #gwen stacy #ghost spider x reader #ghost spider #atsv #atsv x reader #across the spiderverse #spiderman across the spiderverse #hobie brown x reader #miles morales x reader #pavitr prabhakar x reader #miguel o'hara x reader

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undercoverpena · 11 months

Text

a then he almost never had

summary: there is you, though. you who’s curled against him, breathing softly with skin like silk. the t-shirt you’d stolen from him had risen up, exposing the curve of your hip and the dip of your spine. his hand along it, fingers splayed out, keeping you pinned against his chest

javier peña x f!reader word count: 2.9k warnings: season two/three spoilers, angst, reader injury but ends hea. mentions of smut, growing feelings. softness, with Jo-angst. an: i poisoned myself with gluten last night (i'm a coeliac) so this was written at 3am, forgive mistakes. forgive me.

It burns. That’s the first coherent thought that slams into you. It rises, explodes like a firework behind your eyes. And then, it all just fucking burns.

It’s early.

He can tell because the sun hasn’t yet risen—its fingers not currently stretching out and brushing everything it can touch.

He knows this hour well, he wakes at it a lot.

As though it’s programmed within him. Inputted.

It allows for thinking, he supposes. A chance to reminisce, to replay both the good and the bad.

He watches clips from his life, as though he hasn’t already lived them. Unable to stop them from displaying on the back of his lids, the silence provided them a high quality to torture him.

He blames the silence for why they began in the first place.

During the day, they’re kept back through loudness, activity and busyness. But at night, when the moon hangs itself high, and the world sleeps, it allows the drawers in his mind to open—the ones with no organisation, haphazardly stuffed full of regrets, all to creep out and take chunks out of him.

Both memories and failures mixing, dancing—twirling… before shattering. Breaking into shards at his feet, occasionally piercing his soul.

There’s nothing to stop them, no noise, no disturbance. No reason was provided before he shoved the drawer closed and hid all his problems away, tucked them deep inside of himself along with his pride.

There is you, though.

You who’s curled against him, breathing softly with skin like silk. The t-shirt you’d stolen from him had risen up, exposing the curve of your hip and the dip of your spine. His hand along it, fingers splayed out, keeping you pinned against his chest—as if you’ve ever said you want to be anywhere else.

Often, it’s that night he replays the most.

You pleading, all blemished with crimson and trembling. He hears it, the rattle of your voice, the wheeze. Feels the helplessness as if he’s back there.

It doesn’t matter that it was some time ago now, the words hang in the silence when you’re frustrated with him. They blow through the trees when you smile brighter than the sun. Sometimes, they’re even there between moans of his name and silent pleas—just there, on the tip of your breath.

It took the forced time at home to stop seeing you covered in your own blood, to stop that pang of loss at seeing you go down.

Bogotá had tried to break him, but Laredo stitched him back.

At this hour, the time at home feels like a distant memory. So much so, it almost crushes him. Circles around him, reminding him—

It hurts, Javi—fuck it… Stay with me, Javi. Please. Don’t leave, don’t leave me, baby…

Complacency. It’s the reason he’d heard the words, to begin with. He’d taken you for granted, that you would always be there. Jibing him, arguing with him, fucking him.

Then, you’d met asphalt, choking words out he wanted to shove back down your throat. More spluttering from your lips, fingers clutching for him as though he could fill your lungs with breath and stop it all from hurting.

Fuck, he wished he had been able to. Wishes he could.

It doesn’t matter that he’s countlessly reminded himself that you’re alive. You made it. He’s forced himself to feel the pulse in your neck by brushing his lips against the vein in your neck. He’s felt you breathing, hand on your back as you took copious gasps of it, feeling it dance across his ear, blending with his name.

None of it had mattered for a while, not when he had seen you visibly hovering on the line, almost tipping the other way. Almost leaving him alone. He supposes it’s why it’s the fixed movie always showcasing in his mind.

A sick sort of reality check.

He glances at you sleeping, face blank of anything other than pleasant dreams. It settles him, for a moment. Allows him an interval to his usual tortured processing.

He’d always thought you were pretty. Had caught his eye the moment you’d tiptoed into his life.

It was only when you balanced on the line, did Javi wish he had told you that more. Thankfully, because of your grit, determination—and fucking stubbornness—he was able to now.

Whispered it, dropped it into your ears. Watching you go shy, hand batting him away.

It was what you felt for him that had helped you keep your claws in him. Allowed you to grip onto the present, providing the chance to speak before blue lights whizzed you from him.

Lazy mornings. I want lazy mornings following late nights, Javi… want to stop pretending I don’t like you being around…

When he recalls it, the present-him always wishes he had kissed you. Inwardly jeering at his former self for not doing so.

It’s why he hates this hour, how it allows him to tick over the wrongdoings, watching them but never being able to correct them.

Never able to stop noticing the smaller things. How your eyes had paled and how striking the scarlet stains were on your blouse.

How he had felt a hole open in his chest that mirrored the one gouged into your abdomen. How your hand shook in his, fear coursing through your bones—tears cruising down the curve of your cheek as you shoved more wishes and wants at him.

…I’ll make you breakfast— You burn bread, Bonita. I’ll burn it just for you.

It was only when your fingers had slid from his, both pulled and yet released (all at once), did he realise he wanted it too.

All of it.

Standing in that realisation, shirt clinging to his skin. It stained with your pain—your wound, your foolishness. Your wrong time, wrong place, and his sea of regrets. Just watching the ambulance take you, making him want to sink to his knees or sink his fist into the face of the one with the gun.

Mainly, Javi considers that he should have told you that you were going to be fine, that he’d be there when you woke up.

Maybe it would have allowed for an image that wasn’t terrified eyes being all he had for four days until you blessed him once again.

That’s what he thinks the most at this hour.

Not Cali.

Not getting the brothers. Not undoing it all.

Javi thinks about the fact he could have been here without you.

Absently, his fingers twitch for a smoke, tongue desperate for amber. His body even desperate to meet your skin, feel you writhe, feel you clutch him close with fingers, lips and—

It’s a coping mechanism—a distraction. One he used to welcome, used to bury himself in until he felt numb enough to get up again. Now he does this instead.

He ticks.

You’ve never asked me for anything. You never seemed like you had much to give, Javi.

You had a point.

It still stung.

The soft smile the words were delivered with doesn't lessen the ache they leave. If you had worried or thought over why he never stayed once he’d been between your thighs, you never said until that night. Never asked him for anything, not breakfast, not mornings.

Then your resolve had melted, dissolved as though it’d been dropped in acid, made never to exist.

I want to stop pretending I don’t want you around…

He didn’t fear commitment; he feared the risks it brought. The harm it would bring to your door, even if your door were close to his—your job just as perilous.

It had happened all the same.

It hadn’t mattered he had kept you at arms reach, had tried to protect you. You were hurt anyway.

His fears collided into him, bruising him—fracturing bones and searing something through his soul. His worst nightmare came to fruition there in front of his eyes, and he hadn’t been able to do a thing to stop it.

You were good. Too good for him. And then you were crying, bleeding out across a Colombian road, his hand doing a poor job of stopping it from spilling out.

Javi didn’t begin healing until your eyes opened after the bullet ripped through your abdomen. Not when you were out of surgery, only when you looked at him with clarity.

The bruising he felt didn’t fade until he woke with you in his arms weeks later—his bones not forgetting until he heard you whisper those three words when he was buried to the hilt in you.

Those same three words he had thought himself at your bedside, drinking coffee—soaking himself in it, keeping sleep at bay so he never missed you waking. They churned in his throat, say bitterly on his tongue as he ran his hand over his face, index finger sliding over thumb.

He didn’t say them then, though.

Kept them locked away, the key thrown somewhere within his soul.

His focus on you waking. Now, you always wake and sleep beside him. Sometimes soundly, sometimes ticking.

He wonders if you relive it. If you still feel it. If the scar on your side throbs the way his fictional one does.

You don’t flinch when he brushes it, unlike the first month or two. You don’t hide it as much as you once did, his eyes able to accept it’s healed, see the way it’s silvered from time. It still stands out, ever evident when you’re full of him, more so when you’re staring down, rolling your hips to spell his name.

Eyes full of awe and wonder, a sight he doesn’t deserve but drinks up all the same.

I love you. I know. I love you too.

He had whispered it one morning. Your eyelashes fluttered open, smothering him in kindness and hope. It was instinct, to brush his knuckles against your cheek, feeling your smile as well as watching it rise—a prettier sight than any sunrise, especially when his sun had almost been taken.

Your response hadn’t surprised him.

He’d guessed you’d know, been able to tell. Hadn’t done a good job at hiding it, really. Even if he’d poured time into not confessing it, keeping it back, just wanting you safe.

Javi had said them because he liked seeing your things mixed with his—imagined them alongside his in a case. It’s why he bought a ticket for you from Laredo to Bogotá.

You don’t have to come. I know you’re done. Do you want me to come? Yeah. I want you there, bonita. With you or working for you. With me.

Those three words thrummed in him when you walked around his place, unaware of his eyes. They’re plucked in his chest when you’re close, and even when you’re not.

At this hour, it’s too easy to let doubts swirl in.

To allow the good to have the terrible bled into it. He doesn’t need the bad to peel more from him, doesn’t need to meet each insecurity, each fear—not while he works to protect this, maintaining the two of you.

He fans his hand out across your back, hearing you sleepily murmur. It’s instinctive, how he presses a kiss to your forehead, right across the hairline. Nose taking in the scent of his shampoo in your hair, the way you’re warm, alive. Noting how your body rises and falls in slow waves, heartbeat against his ribs, all beating, loud and proud.

I’m here, Javi. I’m okay.

You’d said those for weeks in the days that passed. Healing together, growing stronger.

In time, he hopes those words replace the others—smother them until they go out with a poof. The drawer able to close.

For tonight, he manages to slide it shut.

His hold on you tightening, keeping you close—flush, no room to argue, or for fate to attempt to sneak its way in and keep you apart.

Slowly, he closes his eyes, bidding farewell to the hour—knowing there’s a good chance he’ll see it tomorrow.

Javi. That’s the second thought which collides, forcing eyelids to open. You say his name like a chorus, feeling foreign hands and voices that aren’t familiar. Javi. Javi. Javi—

There are several moments he can attest as to why he’s done.

It’s not the corruption. It’s not that winning, doesn’t feel like winning.

While he feels it should be the chunks it’s taken from him, the way his soul feels fragmented—that he prickles, unsure of who to trust and who even to believe in.

It’s not any of that. Mainly, it’s you.

You who ask for nothing, even now. Living in the same city that almost took your life.

You who doesn’t ask him to promise he’ll be home for dinner, only asking him to be safe. No requests of days that you’d like him to make sure he’s here for.

Instead, you work around him—await a call, a heads up.

I’m on my way home, Bonita. To me? I’m very lucky. Yes. To you.

Something curls out of him when he sees you, when you wrap your arms around his neck and let him taste future and happiness on your lips. It grows, widens when he slides fabric from your skin, unveiling you, allowing his eyes to drink in the sight that gets him through it all.

A sight he tries not to take for granted, but knows he does.

He does so unmeaningly. Let’s late hours slide into late nights; enacts decisions before he realises it has taken him a night in bed alongside you.

So when he’s here, when he’s able to make you his priority, he spends every second—of every minute, of every hour—showing you

Beautiful, so beautiful, mi amor.

He kisses the words across your collarbone, down your breastbone—he takes in the scent of you and flowery scent you tend to wear. Hearing you inhale when your walls tighten around his fingers.

Allows to taste your pleasure from your tongue, before parting your thighs to make you scream again.

There are other way he can treasure you, but this is his favourite—and from the way you knot your fingers in his hand, he suspects this is yours too.

Fuck, cariño—mi amor. What have I done to deserve you?

He thinks it, a lot.

Says it only when you’re atop of him, hips moving with his, hand on his chest.

It’s only when his breath is caught does it hit him. Watching your body bend at the waist, the scar moving with you as you try to dress.

That’s when he realises he’s done. The final nail. The last tally.

The acceptance of it should fill him with dread. This has been his purpose, his occupancy. His goal and his fixation. Instead, the acknowledgement allows a flicker of something in his mind to attempt to grow, bloom, and flower.

At first, it’s not clear. But then he sees you in white, a Laredo sun beating down on you. He sees flowers in your hand, and his hand wearing a ring. His mind even thinks of laughter—not just the two of yours, but one made by someone small.

A future.

Javi allows it to play. Welcoming this new movie—not one born from the past—to display across the blank wall. Tracing the tips of his fingers up and down your bare spine, rising up from his place amongst creased sheets, tasting the sweat on your skin as he kisses your shoulder.

“Cariño, I think—“

“It’s okay,” you whisper.

Knowing you, you’ve likely known for a while. Most definitely knowing from a look, a glance, you suddenly give. A mediocre smile accompanies it, one he knows you’re suppressing.

Because he knows you too.

More than he ever thought he’d allow himself to. It goes further than your coffee order or how you like your breakfast. He knows your favourite flower and that you’re a good baker (even for as bad of a cook as you are).

Javi also knows you were happy with him in Laredo—likely thinking of the same future with him as he’s just had about you.

“Is it?”

It comes out weak, like a noise more than words. Two words which force themselves up from his chest and out past his lips.

Your face cracks, shifting—whatever emotions you were holding back forcing their way through and erupting into small flutters across your face.

But it’s your hand—that same one which had once reached out for him, begging and pleading as your life dangled in the balance—cupping his cheek that lets him know. Thumb brushing over the corner crease of his lips, allowing his shoulders to slide down from his ears—

“Yes,” you whisper.

One word. Simple.

But there’s a story embedded in between each letter. A story that has chapters and sequels, that he can tell you could ramble on about until his ears bleed and his hair turns grey.

You don’t say them, somehow knowing they’re not needed—somehow always knowing him, even if he tries to stop you from seeing that side of him.

The vulnerable side. The one full of cracks.

He knows you’ve caught glimpses. Like when he’d come back from rescuing Christina.

Instead of asking him, you just took his hand and led him to the shower, running fingers through his hair as you frothed soap and kept him close. A silent exchange of words, soft kisses punctuating paragraphs he can’t say.

It’s like that now. A secret knowing. An understanding.

Things hanging, swinging in the wind between the two of you, not needing to be said, yet spelt out all the same.

“I’ll finish this, then…”

Twisting towards him, both hands cupping his face, he almost loses himself in your eyes. How the darkness makes the black larger, but doesn’t distinguish the love, the hope, the kindness…

“And then,” you whisper.

Then. He thinks.

Fingers cupping your hip, thumb brushing across your scar.

A then he almost never had.

But won’t ever surrender now.

“I love—“

“I know,” you whisper, forehead to his.

an: still love me?

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