#my introversion

[astercontrol]

with how solitary and introverted I am in most IRL settings... people always get so surprised to find out I'm poly

I dunno, I guess to them "someone in a polycule" means "someone with insatiable sex drive and/or need for constant companionship; one partner could never be enough"

when for me it means "someone who rarely needs sex or even social interaction... and at those times doesn't usually care much who it is, as long as there's affection and trust... and would rather live with people whose needs CAN get satisfied by someone else, instead of it ALL being on me"

#polyamory #asexual #demisexual #gray ace #gray asexual #gray aro #who even knows what #aromantic #not tron #ramblings #my polycule #my introversion

[inkskinned]

he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.

except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?

at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.

except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.

about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.

he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.

#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag #writeblr #it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal #fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho) #healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy #im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage.... #1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind #and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes #2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception'' #3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.'' #idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh #im sure there are people who have this experience normally #but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists #when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band'' #edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful #once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large #but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry. #but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes #but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally. #i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes #people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism #but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet . #i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY #and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound. #but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in #i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too. #here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change #was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort) #choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL

[emborgor]

Humans and Socialization

Alien: "So... humans are a social species, right?"

Human: "Yes, why?"

A: "I'm getting there. You also require face-to-face interaction with other intelligent beings or your brain starts to get angry? At you? No, not angry. My apologies, I do not know the correct word."

H: "No worries, you're looking for lonely. That is also correct. It effects our bodies as well."

A: "But also for some of you interaction causes you to require hours or days to recover your energy?"

H: "Oh. Yes."

A: "That makes no sense???"

#humans are strange #humans are space australians #humans are space orcs #humans are space fae #humans are deathworlders #humans are space oddities #neurodivergence (at least me (that's my working theory)) #introversion

[the-all-seeing-l]

Whenever someone asks me how I'm feeling, how old I am or what I like to do in my free time, I feel like an alien who took over some random human's body and now has to prove that they are, in fact, that human.

#introvert #introversion #social anxiety #autism #neurodivergence #autism humor #intp #intp problems #intpmemes #intp mbti #intj #intjproblems #intjmemes #infp #infp relatable #infp struggles #infj #infj struggles #infj mbti #my stuff

[murakamijeva-muza]

#infj #infj personality #intellectual #intellectual snob #infj woman #infj t #personality types #personality traits #introvert #introversion #introverts #relatable #no #no is my favorite word #infj thoughts #infj feelings #infj stuff #peaky blinders

[icedmetaltea]

The difference between those who let you leave without any guilt tripping and those who don't is staggering (ft: irl metal)

#jk 9/10 times I either went into shutdown mode or went to cry by the locked car for an hour or longer till family came back #and my parents wouldn't even talk to me bc I ruined the vibe #I wanted to say something about it #but I was just a little sheltered christian kid with horns that hadn't sprouted yet #how glad I am to have ppl in my life who value my social battery now #and just... me. Man it feels weird to have my company enjoyed without conditions to meet #metaltea draws #Metaltea doodles #messy doodles #irl stuff #vent #introversion

[getvalentined]

God I am so fucking tired of the "introverts are quiet and that means they're nice, extroverts are annoying and loud" bullshit. Honestly. This mentality is one of the things that allowed me to spend the better part of two decades believing I was an introvert when I am actually an extrovert with extreme social anxiety.

Introverts generally use energy when interacting with other people.

Extroverts generally gain energy by interacting with other people.

That's it. That's the dichotomy. And it's not even entirely consistent from one person to the next. Extroverts are capable of social exhaustion. Introverts are capable of social excitement. Extroverts are not automatically social butterflies, introverts are not automatically antisocial homebodies. Extroverts may not like making phone calls because it doesn't feel like a "real" social interaction and just leaves them feeling drained, whereas introverts may like phone calls better than in-person interactions because it doesn't feel like a "real" social interaction and doesn't drain their emotional battery.

Introverts are not delicate misanthropes who hate people and never leave their homes. Extroverts are not "emotional sluts" (yes, I've seen this!) who spend all their free time partying or what the fuck ever.

If the thought of going out to interact with other people who you know and enjoy having in your life fills you with dread, guess what? That's not introversion, that's social anxiety. If the thought of not being able to go interact with other people makes you want to break down, guess what? That's not extroversion, that's a symptom of social starvation. Both of these are signs that there is something wrong and you need to talk to a professional, not make quippy posts on the internet about how much extroverts suck because they keep making you go outside or how introverts are so annoying because they never want to spend time with you.

It is not as cut and dry as you have been led to believe, and it never will be.

#personal #might delete later #I'm just so annoyed #if I'd known that introversion doesn't present as FEAR before my 20s #I probably would have been medicated for that MUCH SOONER #this post brought to you by #yet another person going 'instead of asking introverts why they're so quiet #how about you ask extroverts why they never shut up?' #fuck you actually

[cosmosstarlight]

ngl i don't get what it is about this website but i've been a lurker on literally every other platform i've used, but all of a sudden i wanna like interact with people on here wtf is going on

#196 #196 campfire #is my introversion cured can i finally talk to people #i still dont know how this website works but im having a good time doing it

[just-late-roman-republic-things]

Quick i need you to assign mbti-types to your favourite romans

(Myers-Briggs Type Indicator/MBTI)

Pompey: Took an online MBTI quiz five times until it gave him the result he wanted.

Caesar: Can't take an MBTI test because he figured out how to cheese the questions.

Crassus: Sells people MBTI tests.

Cato the Younger: Rants about MBTI being a sign of everything wrong with modern society.

Bibulus: Has never taken an MBTI test but is sure he's an INTJ.

Caelius: Assigns everyone he knows to MBTI types based on vibes. Uses this to judge whether they're "compatible."

Marcus Agrippa: Tells people MBTI is not evidence-based, perpetuates false ideas about how cognition works, and is used as a cover for employment discrimination, thus making it no better than astrology.

Maecenas: Tells Agrippa to lighten up, it's just a silly personality test.

Octavian: Fervently believes in MBTI AND astrology.

Mark Antony: Thinks MBTI must be the initials for some Marcus B_____ Tiberius he's never met.

Cicero: Hired a psychologist for a real personality test and discovered too late he'd signed up for the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory which takes about five hours plus interviews and debriefing. Left the building with an accidental diagnosis, pamphlet for local support groups, and existential crisis.

#problems with the MBTI: 3/4 of its scales don't reflect objectively measurable traits in populations #(only the introversion/extroversion trait is clearly attested) #the 16 possible results are then based on treating these 4 scales as dichotomies #but they're actually spectrums and most people score in the middle #so two folks could answer similarly but get classified very differently based on just a couple minor questions! #sorry for the rant haha. this comes up at my job often so i have strong opinions #if you want an evidence-based fun personality test check out the 'Big Five' test at openpsychometrics.org! #mbti #roman politicians in strange places #just roman memes #just roman asks

[granolagaeilgeoir]

"but you're so warm and friendly to people, you can't be an introvert!"

That's not how that works. I am not a little ray of sunshine, I am a battery-powered flashlight that's very bright but dies out when kept on for too long. Big difference

#THAT my friends is the best explanation of introversion vs extraversion I can explain #extroversion is a self-sustaining reaction #the more you socialize the more energy you get #introversion needs recharge time people #doesn't mean you have to be a recluse or an asshole #introvert #extrovert

[silvermoon424]

Slowly coming to the realization that I actually do want IRL friends I can rely on, I just really don't want to put myself out there, go through the awkward stages of getting to know someone that involves hanging out, and then having to do stuff to maintain that friendship when I actually wanna be alone most of the time.

Man, being autistic and extremely introverted kinda sucks when it comes to this whole "making friends" thing.

#I want friends that are okay with me ghosting them for like 3-4 weeks at a time because my executive dysfunction is so bad lol #friends #introvert #introversion #autism #neurodivergence #neurodivergent

[playwithmydarkestdemons]

Of course I’m posting this for the others.

because I’m in the team “Too Shy”

#my post #me #Meme #Animeme #manga #komi can't communicate #komi shouko #shouko komi #Komi #irl #shy #shyness #introvert #introversion #social anxiety #manga meme #anime meme #fav #pinned #quotes #reblog #Dm #direct message #private message #PM

[welivetodream]

The jealousy of other people's skills, the weight of insurmountable expectations, the fear of not achieving and the limitless procrastination keeps me from doing anything.

The fact there's someone out there working hours after midnight and into the lazy afternoons. The fact there's people who run in the rain to reach a destination. The fact there's people who have someone they think of when they sleep or someone that makes them feel alive. The fact there's someone who works harder than you ever could. The fact there's someone who is way better at what you do without any extra effort. The fact.....you will never be what you want to be in life.

I wish I didn't care about anything. To live a life with no destinations, a path where I don't know to what it is leading to. I want to be a no thoughts; head empty kind of person. I want to have no interests in life or so many interests that the failure of a particular thing doesn't bother me, that I can move on freely from one thing to other without regrets. A life of no assumptions, regrets, resolutions, promises, expectations. A life that's full of colour and light, where I walk as if no one else is watching, talk as if none of my words matter, eat as if there's no effect of the food on my body, sleep as if I can be in an endless slumber.

If you don't have to think or care about anything, you can live a life of a nobody. Your actions won't matter and that's okay, actions make past or future but you would always live in the present.

#mini rant #my rants #shower thoughts #thoughts #intp #intp female #intp stuff #introversion #introvert #i hate the existence of existence itself #i hate living #i hate life #i hate everything #i hate this

[scoutshorror]

We miss you!!

🥹 thanks. i’m… i’m gonna try to come back

#i’ve really settled into introversion in a big way #ceo of isolation #but i miss tumblr dot com #i get overwhelmed with interactions #my bandwidth 📉 #ask

[sneezemonster15]

Extroverts are introverts with really really good coping mechanisms. Lol

#in my experience the divide between extroversion and introversion is a sliding scale #oh well

[vala-dreams]

Y'all ever realize that you're not actually shy and for some reason your whole life everyone called you shy and introverted and your mother berated and compared you to your father for it but you're???? not even shy????????

Like I talk so much to my two friends and I dump information about shit I like or know about to other people and I can refuse to take flyers from people handing them out on the street I literally talk so much,,,,,like I'm not shy why did everyone tell me I'm shy I feel like I would talk to so many more people if everyone hadn't told me I was introverted

#like fr what was all that about #did i just wake up one day and declare im the most introvert to ever introvert and then forget about it??? #why yall so sure???? #i cab talk to cashiers like yeah its a lil awk at first but i get by just fine #i can talk to people i sit next to on the bus #i literally talk so much it might be a bad thing cause i genuinely cannot shit up once i start #idk im just angry i lived my whole life just accepting that im shy and not talking to people and now i cant change and i just sit there #in the corner because that's the place you said was mine and now it looks comfortable to me #or something idk #mental health #being shy #introversion #like does anyone else feel like this i want to know #idk how to explain but i just feel like shyness/introversion wasnt a personality trait i originally had but i stopped talking as much #because people(adults back then i dont think anyone my age ever called me shy back then i was literally so loud)told me i dont talk #and i thought that was me i believed them and that became part of me