#my own experiences.

[ms-all-sunday]

ive personally gotten over the flaws in sanjis articulation and i understand what i think is the intent behind his character but i remember for like months past watching one piece originally i did not get it at all (i have a semi popular post about my friend getting him immediately while shading people who don't but that's me, i was that person) and i had to play around with interpretations of him to truly settle on what i think is concretely understanding him.

the reason, partially, for my original trepidation is twofold,

one, shonen does not have a good track record.

two, more personally, it's kind of insulting to the audience to expect this character who you've established has a relationship with women that has it's pros and cons (i always go back to the arlong park articulation of zoro respecting nami enough to see her as a threat and sanji because she's a woman, willing to look past what is obviously a mental breakdown from someone whos struggling. that was like the best articulation oda couldve done it all goes downhill from there) and like fully acknowledge inherently the social injustice that women face within that, while also doing the social injustice. it's hypocritical.*

ive taken to just categorically ignoring the pervert jokes and pretending we never progressed past pre ts sanjis jokes (which by the way and i say this with every spiteful bone in my entire body, were FUNNIER. it is such a fucking crime that sanji a character that had SO many consistently funny jokes because he is an hilarious comedy character, gets absolutely no funny jokes. the most recent funny joke he's had is egghead but before that it wasn't for years that he had a funny joke.) because the good thing and also the function of the sanji jokes especially as they relate to nami is that nami can and does cushion how creepy he comes off. they are in a weird consensual heterosexual chicken game and it says something about them that they treat eachother like this. unfortunately when you reduce sanjis jokes down to pervert anime jokes you also loose their back and forth which hurts namis characterization and as i've said before. the group dynamic is everything. you cannot hurt it it is sacred or one pieces quality declines (post timeskip)

*This is also a similar way that one piece as a story treats abuse more broadly. There's this thing that I call in my head "intent is effect" logic where basically if a character had good intent dot tm they're forgiven for abuse by the narrative and their abuse is played off as a joke (garp) or you're judge (the most evilest man on the planet which btw did you know all abusers are evil and not complicated human beings /s) (do NOT interpret me as saying this as a hashtag abuse apologist thing i will kill you. i am a persona 5 fan, ideologically.) i would pretty much definitively say that uh the same logic is applied to sanjis sexual assault/harassment jokes, as they are a type of abuse. and uh that's bad. it's shitty on all accounts for sure.

although im sure id become more fuelled by rage and question the stability of my own opinions if i watched the shittier parts of post TS again, I'll eventually get there in my rewatch don't worry.

#modposts #op #one piece #meta #black leg sanji #you see if someone asked me spefifically what my interpretation of sanji is id crumple #the reason id crumple is the way i interpret him is based on my own experiences with women and what having the types of emotional issues he #does looks like. i took what originally i resented for being a negative protrayal of an emotional issue i have to uh an articulation of #my own experiences. #unless you want to explictly base your sanji interpretation off of me. which fine okay do whatever im not the government #but i assume most people wouldnt want to. #to some degree every strawhat ive ever written is explictly based on myself thats just how i write characters #uh. just osdd things i guess #abuse tw

[gayvampyr]

no offense but you guys need to learn the difference between someone implying their experience is universal and a post simply just not being about you

#i’ve seen people respond to my personal posts venting about my own experiences and say that it’s ‘not universal’ or ‘needs more nuance’ #like??? no it doesn’t ?? it’s a vent #i don’t need to pass it through peer review #text post #10k #top posts #15k #20k #25k #30k #40k #50k #60k #80k

[anonymousdandelion]

Reblog for a larger sample size for no sample size at all, because obviously nobody will vote

#polls #poll #tumblr polls #dandelion polls #social experiment #sorry y'all I couldn't resist #I have no idea if my own restraint will pass the test

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

#warm up #writeblr #this one has bothered me for a bit #any time a woman does something even passingly annoying we treat it like a fucking crime #hey man. women are allowed to be annoying. everyone forever is allowed to be passingly annoying #as long as they aren't hurting anyone/thing #like u wanna know something? i find it super annoying that men don't wear seatbelts #why arent there thousands of comments on driving videos thats just like : men try not to die in a car crash challenge #''this briefly annoyed me''. okay??????? AND????????????????? go get ur self a cookie and calm down about it #ur not entitled to control other ppl's experiences and emotions just so u can maintain ur own peace #if being briefly annoyed ruins ur whole day! you! need! therapy!!!! #men try not to become immediately angry about nothing challenge: level impossible #ps author is nonbinary. we didn't even get into the gender presentation thing #the fact men think it's SEXY that my voice is on the lower end....

[severalowls]

Its absolutely no coincidence that the people being sent baseless sexual assault accusations against predstrogen have, from what I've seen, been young transmascs.

The terfs behind the harassment campaign are so brazenly trying to prey on anybody they reckon might have any transmisogynist tendencies and are trying to use that to sow discord in the trans community. They see transmasculine people as potential avenues for recruitment (and eventual detransition) and it's extremely fucking important that the people being sent these anons do not fall headfirst for the bait. They want you to go 'uh oh, guess trans women are sex pests after all' and that to stick with you and fester, and turn that seed of prejudice into the continued harm of transfem people.

If you want to be a meaningful ally to transfem people right now you have to be vigilant for this shit, and correct it where you see it. If you think being used as an angle of recruitment by bigoted harassment is gross, imagine how it would feel to be the damn focus of the harassment.

#like my own experience in transmasc-heavy spaces has been positive! #but for every ten cool friends theres one guy who gets all weird the moment i speak in voice chat #that one guy is who is being 'stay safe :)' annoned right now.

[starplatinumnun]

can you infodump to me? (i love you) is this overwhelming? (i love you) is this the right texture? (i love you) is it ok to touch you? (i love you) do you want the subtitles on? (i love you) do you want to go somewhere less noisy? (i love you)

#actuallyautistic #autism #autistic #this is about what love feels like to me as an autistic person with neurotypical family and friends #you are more than welcome to add your own experiences! #red instead #autism acceptance #neurodivergent #my writing

[transmascchiato]

#first ever comic #im always looking for transmasc comics so #i made my own #hope it resonates with someone too #trans pride #transmasc #trans comic #transgender #transexual #trans experience #top surgery #my art #trans artist

[thunderc1an]

how to love a stranger

#warriors #warrior cats #thunderclan #sparkpelt #firestar #my comic #this comic is based on my own experience #with my grandmother who I never met #remember that wip I posted like a little bit ago of the comics I had planned #yeah hehehehe #I wanna add one more thing but hmmmmmm still deciding how to word it hmmm #if u see any grammar or spelling mistake... no u don't

[ao3commentoftheday]

managing creative envy

Just like in other areas of our lives, it's easy to be jealous of others when we create in fandom spaces and post online - the online aspect of fandom just offers more opportunities for it. Hits, kudos, comments, reblogs. Whatever unit of measurement you look at, there's always some number out there ready to tell you who's "better" and who's "worse" at whatever creative endeavor you engage in.

Except that none of those numbers actually gauge skill or quality.

When we're jealous of those numbers, what we actually wish we had isn't bigger numbers, it's attention. Reassurance. Excitement. Community. Whether the number is 5 or 5000, that's what it represents. We want those things and that other person has more of them, and so we end up jealous.

To manage that jealousy, we need to understand what we need and then find ways to get it. It might not come from posting on AO3, but maybe it comes from a local writer's group. Maybe there's someone in your life that you wish cared a little more about your "silly stories" and took you more seriously when you spoke about writing. Maybe what's missing isn't related to writing at all and it's more about having someone who cares about you and thinks you're important.

But numbers are just one thing to be jealous of. Perhaps the envy is instead because of another person's abilities. They come up with such interest plots! They have such fun ideas! They always have the perfect words, the singing phrases. For them it's easy, and for me it's just impossible!

Whether it's easy for them or not isn't what's making us envious, though. It's not about them and their abilities at all. It's about feeling like our own skills are lacking. The envy comes in because that person has what we want and don't yet have.

If we want to get past this type of envy, we need to refocus our energy away from being sad or angry or hopeless because another person is able to do something. Focus instead on celebrating the things we already do well. Take the time to notice improvements. Identify specific things we want to do better, and figure out how to learn. Remember, asking for help is always an option - and it might even lead to that feeling of community that might be lacking too.

Emotions are information that we need to take the time to interpret. Take the time to reflect on what's causing it. Find the thing that's missing from your experience and then figure out how to fill the gap.

#thinky thoughts #I haven't quite got all my thoughts together on this one yet #but I want to put this out there #and see what experiences other folks have had #try to fill in the gaps in my own understanding

[yakny]

WILDFLOWERS

#colored explorations‚ studies‚ and experiments #naruto #sakura haruno #something something wildflowers aren't planted. they grow on their own something something #anywho. a background practice... to fill the solid colored backgrounds/negative spaces of my blog 🥹👍

[uncanny-tranny]

Basically, my philosophy around disability fakers is: I would rather a thousand people fake a disability than have one disabled person suffer without care, aids, compassion, or any help.

#disability #disability advocacy #and there's a difference not many people seem to recognize between faking and realizing you don't have [x] problem... #...such as realizing you don't have [x] disorder because it is instead [y] disorder... #...or you haven't completely understood your care needs/your symptoms/what helps you... #...and some people see ANY change in your understanding of your disability as proof of maliciously faking... #...when i suppose in my personal experience people don't *maliciously* fake disability... #...i'm not saying it could never happen but that i don't think it's the *only* thing motivating people called fakers #i just think (like most everything) this is complex and nuanced because it's a *human* experience #like for me personally i /know/ i still have a lot to learn about my disabilities... #...like... i realized recently that my hands shouldn't be in AGONY when warm water is ran over them when it's SLIGHTLY cold inside or out... #...and i realized that i likely have a Noticable limb difference that needs checking out. does this sound like i'm faking... #...or that maybe i just didn't really explore my own needs and body because of a variety of factors? #i can assure you it is because i haven't really thought before about how i deserved to understand how to best help myself

[anatomical-puppet]

my source is that i am autistic about horror

#this took longer than i thought it would but i needed to. for my own sanity. #also sorry if the ids are bad i dont have a ton of experience writing them and wasn't sure how to format smth this text-heavy lol #horror #horror movies #body horror #gore #saw #<- mostly tagging for organizational purposes and also bc people calling saw body horror is the main reason i felt the need to make this #puppet scribbles

[sabertoothwalrus]

so I’ve been gaining a lot of insight into the animation industry recently, especially in regards to pitching & the creation of new shows. There’s a few ways to go about it.

First, there’s pitching to a studio. When you pitch, it has to be SHORT and CONCISE. You may write a lovingly detailed pitch bible that perfectly breaks down episodes and characterizations, and it might barely even get read. First impressions, first impressions, first impressions!

Most peoples’ first projects don’t get picked up. I’ve heard a few stories from directors that said they tried pitching a story they’d had for years, which got rejected, to then spend a week or even several hours in their car coming up with a new idea, only for that to get greenlit.

But that’s not the end of it. Just because a show gets greenlit, doesn’t mean it will ever get finished. There’s lots of things that can happen. Sometimes, unexpected major world events (like… a global pandemic) can cause projects to get chopped. Sometimes, a CEO change or studio merge means a single person can decide a project “no longer fits with the company’s brand.” Sometimes, the one producer that was rooting for your project gets laid off, and no one else cares enough, so it gets shelved. Sometimes, a streaming service decides to create an animation department, and then they decide they don’t want it anymore. Sometimes, the studio will be simultaneously be developing another project that was too similar to yours and they just didn’t think to tell you until they decide yours is the one with less potential.

On top of that, almost everyone in the industry is saying that “studios just don’t pick up original content anymore.” Studios want something they can franchise, something that will bring in money. New content is risky. Established fanbases are safer.

However! Studios can still be a very good thing. They can be unionized. They can provide better benefits and resources. They can have connections and infrastructure and a larger volume of workers. At a studio, you can divide the labor and produce more in less time. Longer episodes, longer seasons, more consistency in quality.

But this comes with all of the disadvantages of having more in the kitchen.

The alternative is indie animation.

With indie animation, you have total freedom. Full artistic control. It doesn’t even matter if your idea sucks ass, because there’s no one to tell you you can’t make it. You could make it anyway, and you can make it whatever you wanted.

The thing is, making animation is hard. In my production class last semester, the average maximum animation one person could make in that timeframe was 30-60 seconds, and that’s not even counting background design, sound design, or cleanup/color. To make a 5 minute animated short, you should probably have at least 5 people.

And it is CRUCIAL you have a production manager. Ideally someone who’s not already doing art for the project. Most projects without a production manager will fall apart pretty quickly. Once the adrenaline and impulse-fueled motivation wears off, you need someone to hold you accountable and enforce deadlines and proper time management.

Speaking of time, that’s also hard to get. The more people you have, the more likely schedules won’t line up. Most people will have school, or other jobs.

And it costs MONEY!!!!!! You either have everyone work for free and volunteer their time & energy, or you establish a business as a proper indie studio, with people who may or may not have experience on how to handle paying someone else’s salary. And the money has to come from somewhere, so you have to rely on crowdfunding like patreon or kickstarter. (This, by the way, is why I could never fault an indie animation for releasing merch with their pilot.)

And like, maybe you wanna do a series, and all your friends agree to volunteer their labor and time to make the first episode, but it was unanimously not sustainable. Deciding not to produce a second episode until you can raise enough money is not being suddenly greedy, it’s attempting to compensate people rather than expecting them to be continuously taken advantage of.

You have to consider your output as well. There are some outliers like Worthikids, who afaik does all his animation himself, and afaik can work on it full-time thanks to his patreon subscribers. And he still has only produced a total of 30 minutes of animation (for Big Top Burger specifically) in the past 4 years. This is an IMPRESSIVE feat and this is with using a lot of 3D as part of his pipeline!!

Indie animation also has the complication of being more accessible for fandoms. When you’re posting your Official Canon Content on youtube, it doesn’t look a lot different than the fandom-created video essay in the sidebar next to it. What’s canon vs what’s fanon becomes less distinguishable. The boundaries are blurrier. When the creator is just some guy you follow on twitter, it’s easier to prod them for info regarding ships and theories and word-of-god confirmation. They don’t have a PR team or entire international tv networks to appeal to. And this is when creators get frustrated that their fans snowball and turn their creation into something they don’t recognize (and no longer enjoy) anymore.

So it’s tricky.

Thankfully, the threshold to learn animation is fairly low nowadays!! There are TONS of resources online to learn it on your own without forking over a couple hundred thousand to a private art college. There are conventions and discord servers and events where you can network, if you know where to look.

I know it can seem discouraging in the face of capitalism, but I think that’s all the more reason why it’s so important to BE DETERMINED about animation!! We’re already starting to see the beginning of an indie animation boom, and I think it’s a testament to humanity’s desire to tell stories and create art. Even if there’s no financial gain, we do whatever it takes to tell our stories anyway.

#animation #2d animation #indie animation #long post #not 100% sure why I made this post #all this to say: I’m still not sure what direction I want to go towards for my own show #ngl!! i think im confident i could get people to like my show. i think I could find an audience #i have some experience at this point getting people to like my ocs #its just a matter of MAKING the damn thing

[classicslesbianopinions]

the other thing about being disabled in academia is everyone is like "yeah we can't do much about the buildings they're old :/" as if "old" being a synonym for "inaccessible" isn't just a constant reminder that the people who built the school did not imagine that someday someone like me might study there

#mod felix #obviously there's some stuff that's way more accessible with like. electricity. like. i can get to the second floor. for example #but like. it's still possible to have. for example. ramps. if you as a culture value disabled people and their work #i miss when i was at a school where 'these are old buildings' meant 'these buildings were built for cows instead of people' #rather than 'these buildings were built for students just not students like you' #and of course this is another one that applies to many marginalized groups and like. many groups more than disabled people #in the sense that like. my school was also built to explicitly exclude people of color. for example #but i speak from my own experience and my own experience is characterized by ableism more than anything else #but like . again if you read this and you're like 'this feels like it applies to me in ways unrelated to disability' #well it probably does.

[conspicuous-clown-car]

my favorite scene from love death and rollerskates

please PLEASE go read Love, Death and Rollerskates by @spadilleliciousit on ao3 its AMAZING AAAUHGHG

#listening to the songs as they were mentioned while reading LDR was such a lovely experience #esp this part omfg #had me cackling at 2 am #i hope its okay that i made my own little self insert version of y/n #love death and rollerskates #fnaf moon #fnaf dca #fnaf daycare attendant #kirbsart

[cemeterything]

#🐉 #this is what i love about being involved in community spaces for fiction though tbh #everyone has different personalized interpretations of the source material and some of them align with my own or make me go 'oh huh i never #thought of that but yeah i can see it' while some of them just dont compute at all and make me wonder if we saw the same thing #which of course. we didnt. or rather we saw the same objective source material but we *saw* it completely differently through the lens of #our own experiences and worldview. #its so cool #however i will sometimes be a hypocritical little hater about it