#no men will embarass you like produce show men | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kookiecrumb · 3 years

Text

jjk|| Your Head

"tags": @kazthebrekkerofinej

word count: uhhhh

summary: Jungkook is the heir to the throne of your Kingdom! In this tale of duty versus heart, will love prevail victorious?

tags: Royalty!Jungkook x Peasant!Reader, oneshot, smut, fluff, slight angst, some crack, pining, forbidden lovers, Jungkookie has a sweet tooth, strangers to friends to lovers

warnings: explicit language, impact play, birthday sex (technically), fingering, oral (m receiving*), love marking, alcohol consumption, s&m themes, horny grinding, praise kink/body worship

a/n:

hey guys!

Firstly, I want to say how proud I am of myself for growing so much during this fic. I learned a lot about what I'm comfortable with, what I'd like to work on, and where my confidences lie.

I won't lie and say it's been easy, because writing this meant dealing with a lot of my fears? I'm excited for all the works that are to come.

The only thing I can do is be as receptive to growth as possible, so I'm looking forward to learning...

*I actually learned that Vaseline wasn't invented until like the 1870s? The fic is written in the 1810s, so I actually had a choice between having them do it with vegetable oil or spit. Spit won.

◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇

5 years ago

You bend over to pick up an apple that had rolled over under your father's produce cart, praying that it isn't bruised so that you have to pay for it out of your dinner, when a crumpled piece of paper hits you in the ass.

Confused, you crawl out from under the stand and unwrap the paper.

The paper itself is of the finest quality you've ever seen. It's a sturdy cardstock, bleached white with gold etchings on the borders. The print on the top of it reads "His Highness Jeon's Royal Study," and scribbled in some kid's amateur cursive below, "Nice butt."

You directed your gaze upwards, towards the towering castle walls. Sure enough, a boy no older than 15 had his noggin popping out from the top of the rampart, with two wide eyes staring down, curious as to your reaction. This was Prince Jungkook, heir to the throne of your kingdom.

"Shouldn't you be equestrian horse riding or playing polo or something?" You shout. He furrows his eyebrows, apparently offended at your assumption, and then disappears behind the edifice.

Moments later, another paper hits your shoulder as you're practicing your caligraphy behind your cart. It lands between the apples, so you reach your hand over and fish out out.

You glance up at the anticipant, and sure enough he's there with his doe eyes and his coconut head, ogling.

"No, dumbie. That's at MID-day." Well how were YOU supposed to know the royal schedule of the crown prince, it wasn't just common knowlegde you learned from being a humble farmer's daught--

Ah!

"Will you STOP?!" You put your foot down. "Unless you're here to buy my apples, then you're not getting ANY, little Prince." Oh, shit. You gave him ideas. Now it was really over for you.

In less than half an hour, half a company of men arrived at the marketplace, asking about your little old apple stand, and sure enough, Jungkook had bought out the entire cart so that you were forced to help with the transaction.

The young prince had eyes frankly too big for his head, with the most prominent cupid's bow you've ever seen. His nose slightly outgrew his face and his ears were hidden away behind his short, black hair. "Now you can talk to me." He gave you a rose he'd stolen from the royal garden. "I am Jungkook, heir to the throne of--"

"I know who you are." You interrupt him, documenting His Highness' total in your calligraphy book.

With a hand perched on his chest from surprise, he scoffed. "And I happen to think you're really pretty, so I was going to ask you to be my very first consor--"

"You're 15, you have playmates not consorts."

"And how old are you?!" He's had it, raising his voice and taking a bite out of one of your apples with force.

"16, old enough to have suitors." You tease. Jungkook hangs his head a little. He just needed someone to talk to, it would seem. Reluctantly, you scribbled down your address down on a piece of note paper and handed it to him.

"Look, if you buy more of my apples, I'll have an excuse to tell my Dad so I can hang out with you." You spoke in a low voice as to not raise suspicion.

Your dad is standing negotiating with the guards about prices, his usual embarassing haggling gruffly overpowering the guards elegant twiddle-tones.

"Wonderful! See you soon, my sweet!" He resumes his confident demeanor, tucking the paper into his overcoat with a small smile. He salutes you boyishly and marches away with a year's supply of apples.

For the next week, the royal kitchen had baked 3 apple pies, made 5 fruit salads, 4 batches of apple muffins, and threw the rest of them in Sangria; that's the same Sangria as King Jeon finds himself drinking in his wife's drawing room on Sunday.

"Call Chef, fetch him up here." He waves to his assistant, keeping his eyes on the outside. He was deep in thought, his hands stoicly behind his back.

The Kingdom had been prosperous for over many years now, and war had not come close to threatening its borders in a lifetime. Negotiations were always successful, and quality of living was high. The work of a King, in a situation such as this, was to perfect the image of the royal family as strong rulers, and to paint his daughters as desirable to foreign heirs.

"Your Grace," the assistant called his attention, "Head Chef Sung." The dainty man bows and scurries off somewhere else.

Chef Sung is a portly man, who carries himself heaving with every step, his great belly inflating with each hefty inhale. He approaches the King, and kneels down to kiss his hand with his fat lips.

The King recoils in disgust, but quickly collects himself and his words. "Where are these apples from, is it France or Spain?" He demands.

"Neither, Your Highness." Mr.Sung lifts up his eyes. "They are from our Holy Kingdom; by order of Prince Jungkook, an entire cart was purchased of these apples and we have not been able to get rid of them." Tears threatened Chef Sungs eyes at the very mention of the fruit.

'Well, there's one thing the kid's done right.' King Jeon now faces the Chef, setting down his drink on a mahogany table, leaning against it casually. "Well! Good. I'd like to meet the owner of that cart, invite him to my Sunday brunch."

"Oh, yes, of course sir! You'll never see them in our kitchen aga--What?" Chef Sung takes out his handkerchief, waving it around in the air and drying his tears at once. "So you like them! Why...Yes! Yes, of course!"

Your father thought it would be valuable to have you around the kitchen, learning from the skilled men and women employed by the Jeon family. He only visited once a week to drop off fresh produce, (he'd been officially hired to handle restocking of goods) but you, after showing promising signs of being a gifted baker during one of your father's restocks, were granted scholarship by Ms.Kang to be her aid.

You were now, officially, a resident of the Jeon Estate, residing in the servant's quarters, immediately adjacent to the kitchen. This was convenient. It was far too convenient for a certain little Prince to get the idea of wanting a midnight snack and wandering downstairs.

One day, he does just that. He finds his way into the first bedroom to the right of the stairs facing the kitchen, and that happens to be your bedroom.

He pokes you awake. "Ow! Ow, whyyy~" You whine and toss yourself over to the other side of the bed. His irritating poking persists. You grab his fingers and your eyes shatter open.

You sit up, alarmed. "You could have me arrested, what the fuck are you doing?!"

"I wanted a midnight snack! Besides, I wanna talk to you." He pouts, still holding a small teddy companion.

"Fine. I'll bake you ONE sheet of cookies." You slip on your night shoes and shuffle to the kitchen, and Jungkook tags along.

By the time Jungkook's 18th birthday comes around, he's in the kitchen helping you whisk buttercream to top his cake while having a tease at the Austrian Princess' mole.

"You have one right under your lip, look!" You take a little buttercream from the bowl and stain the dark spot with it.

He licks it up and hastens to add, "it needs more sugar, lady!" as he turns to grab a puffy bag of confection sugar.

"You're impossible to please." Snatching the sugar away from him, you smirk. "You can gobble down as many sweets as you want when the ball commences. Remember, this is the year you're supposed to be keeping your eye out for a girl of a good fam--"

"Yada yada, must have hips for childbearing, yada yada yada..." He mocks the speech his mother had told him that morning when he got dressed.

"Exactly." You set your bowl aside to fix Jungkook's tie. "Yes, and that's your duty, as our heir."

You step back and examine Jungkook one more time. He'd grown so tall in the last year, his legs like spider's and he was just beginning to grow into his features. Handsome boy.

You, too, had grown into an elegant young woman. You had a poised complexion, ready-mannered and graceful. Your hands seemed out of place in your otherwise feminine frame, carrying an extra bit of girth from baking. You were 19 years old.

Marriage was becoming an uncomfortably frequent topic during your visits home, as your mother had married young, herself, she expected the same of you.

Truth be told, there were plenty of offers for your hand. You were a skilled and very esteemed individual, who had broken into thr artisinal class. But your father knew better than put a dowry on your happiness. So long as you worked, he saw no reason to marry you off just yet.

"Now, go. Your sisters must be worried sick! Go out there." You shoo him, pushing him out the door of the kitchen despite his flailing arms.

Throughout the party, you'd been carrying a platter of your own baked goods, serving them to the aristocrats attending the Princes' coming-of-age ball. Accents from all over Europe and some from Kingdoms as far East as Cyprus jubilantly engaged in artful conversation which filled the air with good spirits.

Jungkook, himself, was busy being introduced to as many women as possible, a medley of presenting duchesses, ladies, and even Princesses of your Kingdom. They were each more qualified than you'll ever be, ten-fold.

One was a Greek Princess, her hair cascaded in darling curls down her shoulders and her eyes were deep-set, her voice a flirtatious trill.

Another, a Prussian Princess', posture radiated excellency, and whose complexion sparkled like powdered snow. Jungkook greeted her warmly, pleased with her appearance.

Distracted, you tripped up your skirt and dropped the remainder of your pastries. With that, you stepped off to use the restroom.

The sound of Strauss' Rosen aus dem Süden faintly loomed in the air as you wiped tears from your waterline in the mirror. That was just the way it was, wasn't it? Princes come of age, and they find wives who they commit their lives to.

"Married men don't have friends who are girls." You say out loud, just to realize it. Jungkook was now expected to find a mate within the season, and he was, in fact, quite the eligible bachelor.

Little did you know that Jungkook had been keeping an eye out for you throughout the party, not only because you were carrying his favorite Danish pastires, but because he knew your company was his greatest comfort.

He's in the midst of greeting the Duchess of Kent when he excuses himself to go look for you. He finds your mess first, frowning as he realizes something has gone terribly wrong.

He catches you in the hallway, face puffy and shaky. He grabs your wrist to keep you from darting back to the kitchen.

"Please don't do this, it's my birthday, y/n." It's as if an unspoken rule had been broken between you, and he feels it. Something is making you uncomfortable. "Was it the girls? You told me about this, it's my duty to at least greet them and--"

"Yeah, you sure did greet the Prussian woman nicely." You speak through tears. "She's the girl you were born to be with, huh? Your birthright?"Jungkook is silent. "Every girl at that ball wants to be your wife, want to have your children. They haven't known you for a day and yet they're ready to be your bride."

You search Jungkook's eyes for any sign of coherence, hoping that he would defend against you, that he would speak up and tell you otherwise. No such argument comes.

You yank your arm from his grip and march to the kitchen to remake the pastries you spilled.

You had the job of clearing off all the tables upon the departure of the last guests. It is midnight, and the windows of the castle stream moonlight down on the carpet beneath your feet. The glow of candles soothe you as you hum the waltzes which echo in your mind. It's a brilliant evening.

The centerpieces of the tables were gardenias, lush rose-like flowers with yellow pistils.

Summer, 1809

"Jungkook, wait! You're going to make me trip!" You shout from the top of the hill.

"You've gotta come see before the sun sets! It's the only way we'll get there on time, now run!" Jungkook's speeding down the terrain towards the Sycamore tree which grew deep and wide beneath the banks of a great rushing river.

You groan and throw caution to the wind, rolling down the steep mount in your Sunday dress. Jungkook turns to watch you, a grin spreading across his handsome face. "Look at you!"

You land on your feet at the bottom and scurry off to join Jungkook under the grandfather tree, out of breath entirely. "Now, look what you made me do. You're such a boy, you know that?! Making me come out here just to see some bloody--"

Jungkook has plucked a gardenia and placed it behind your ear. "Would you shut up? We got here on time. Behold."

In all its glory, the sun bathes you in its vivacious rays, creating a feeling of heavenly bliss as it dips below the horizon. The sky blushes pink, its clouds mere whisps above you. Wind rustles the leaves of the grand tree, rousing the birds to chirp their afternoon song.

"Mom used to come here all the time with my Dad, because of these." Jungkook clasped the blooming flower in his tender hands.

After a while, he says "the bugs will come out soon, so we ought to go back," as if he's trying not to scare something away. He helps you up, and with one last look across the valley, you walk next to each other back to the East Quarters.

You take all the silverware and plates by the tub to the dish-washing station and toss all of the linen napkins into the washing machine. All you had left was to blow out the lights in leading upstairs.

"Prince! It is very late, and there are no guests left for you to entertain. What troubles you?" Jungkook's sitting on the stairs with his head in his hands, still wearing his best suit.

"I disappointed you, y/n...I didn't like any of them." He admits, lifting his head up to sulk at you. "I should have told you then, but I didn't want to make you upset!"

Did Jungkook mistake your jealousy for disappointment?

"I'm not upset because you didn't hit it off with the girls..." You sigh. A confession is due, and he's ready to hear the truth from you about how you feel about him.

"Well, the truth is, I didn't like any of the girls because I like you, y/n. But you know that, don't you?" You pause, asking him to elaborate.

"Remember when I bought all the apples because I wanted to be with you? Like...I told you that you were my consort and I kind of meant it?" He felt pathetic now, realizing that you weren't just ignoring his advances. "So you didn't friendzone me for 2 years, you actually didn't know that I liked you."

It was almost laughable, a situation you would read in one of your illegal novels which you kept tucked away in your pillow at night. "No, Kookie, I didn't." You admit to your insolence.

You can't bear to lead him on any longer. You needed to put duty over your own self interest for the sake of the kingdom, even if it shattered his hope. It was better this way.

"But, you do know that we can't ever be a thing, right? It's just silly." Your heart tightens with the words which fall out of your mouth. "It is. Nevermind what your parents would think, what would it do for your image? You're on the world's stage, Jungkook, and you're a selfish person if you think you can just throw all of your duties away to date a scum of the Earth like-- like me!" With your heart in your throat, dry your eyes with your sleeve. "And...I want to, I really really want to, more than anything else to love you, Jungkook. I love you! I...can't." Through the blur of your tears, the shapeless blob that Jungkook has become stands up.

Taking his thumb and swiping it under your eyes, he sighs. Words escaping him, he takes your trembling body against his chest and nestles his head in the crook of your neck. Your cold hands travel underneath his overcoat to hold his waist. The Princes' lips plant a gentle kiss on your neck, chaste yet deep and satisfying.

"I will not accept any bride if not you, my love." He draws back, meeting your fervid gaze. "To the world, I remain a bachelor for a few years."

"And after those years, Jungkook?" You ride your hands up to caress the man's jaw. "You will still love me after those years, and then what?"

"I don't know," he says, voice as soft as powder. "I don't know many things, y/n, that's why I need you to teach me." His palms are rubbing at your waist, beckoning you closer.

His breath quickening as you lean your body against his hold, and you figure it must be the wine he drank to calm his nerves. That was it, wasn't it? He was drunk.

"You're not drunk, are you?" Your face sours, really hoping it's not the case as you feel your body temperature rise.

"Y/N, I've only had a glass. You saw I was a wreck back there." His lips kept chasing yours in a dance you can't quite describe. "I have wanted to hold you like this since I saw you selling apples on the street. Give me the honor..." His forehead against yours and his strong hands supporting your back, he's already fucking you with his eyes.

"The pleasure of being your lover." He squeezes your waist tight with his forearms, planting brisk kisses behind your ear and breathing in your scent. He smiles against you. Your skin pebbles at his affectionate touch, purring softly as your eyes roll back in delight.

"Kookie..." You breathe, leaning on his broad chest. "Kook, the maids are wondering where I am, I have to go..." You slur, tugging at his collar.

He grunts in protest, taking your ear between his teeth and nibbling it.

"If you let me go, I'll steal some cake for you tomorrow at breakfast." If there's anything Jungkook likes more than Cream Ice, it was cake. He unravels you from his arms and nods, his eyes softening.

"Request my service tomorrow, from Ms.Kang. She's been sweet on me lately." You peck his cheek before stepping back. Your rouge has embarrassingly stained His Grace's cheek.

Jungkook bows and presses a kiss on your hand, eyes rising to meet yours. "Til' morrow, babe."

Jiyoo shakes you awake the next morning, handing you a cake and a note that reads: "Prince Jungkook has a commission he must discuss with you. Meet him at his chamber immediately."

Lacing on a simple corset over your nightgown, you try not to look too red in the face as you climb up the stairs to His Majesty's room. You'd be up there alone, as requested. The girls would absolutely start rumors based on that alone-- rumors which you realize are probably totally true. This was stuff of scandal, after all...

'There shouldn't be anything scandalous about love.' You decide as you rap on His Highness' door.

"Please enter...but only if you have my cake!" Jungkook says in his morning voice. He's so cute.

The simplicity of Jungkook's abode takes you by surprise. His bedroom is very well lit, a capital display of the flowered valley through his bay windows washed the room in gold, painting his porcelain white carpets and his cotton sheets a warm creme color. His drawers and vanity were etched in gold, with breathtaking detailing.

The Monarch himself was splayed across the bed, laying on his side casually. He held a glass in his hand, holding a white wine. He puts down his glass and sits up as your presence.

"We both know that you didn't come here as my servant." You lock the door behind you. "And I have no such commission to give you, darling." The innocence which undertones his usual speech is missing as he coaxes you towards him.

"This much I know, Your Majesty," You say, taking a bit of frosting on your index finger and smudging it on the Princes lips. His black eyes, as cunning as a viper, watch you dangerously as you push two fingers past his plush lips. He wraps his hands around your wrist and draws your hand away, his gaze fixating on you.

"Set the cake down." At his command, you carefully place the confection down on a nearby chest, feeling Jungkook's eyes on you, drawing you back towards his grip.

"Let me pull your laces apart," with your waist held by his Herculean hand, he hums "and then let me pull you apart. I want to memorize your pleasures and gratify your desires, I need it, y/n..." Your back flush against his chest and your thighs split, his hands knead into you as he litters your collar with his mark.

You gasp softly against the crook of his neck, giving into his hold of you. His hot tongue spreads under your jaw, closing into a hard kiss as his hands travel back up to undo your corset and free your tits.

One by one, his fingers pop open the buttons left on your gown until the collar hangs off-shoulder to expose your collarbone. At the sight of new skin, Jungkook's tongue darts to stain it.

His hands stagger above your breasts. "Is it okay if I touch you here?"

"Oh, Kookie, touch me everywhere~" Your hands form fists around Jungkook's shirt, beckoning him impossibly closer.

Grasping one ever so carefully, his thumb grazes your bud as he playfully bites under your ear. "ah-- ahh,"

Jungkook groans in response, he can't believe how cute you sound. Curious, he wants to hear more, so he traces your thighs and experimentally pushes up the outside your cunt.

You squirm, tensing up immediately in response. You bring your hands down to find the latch on his trousers and dip your hands below to rub him through his undergarments. He heatedly bucks up to meet your touch, a panting mess.

You face him now as he watches you ride his fingers while you grip his girth through his clothes. He takes you by the ass and places you on his prominent bulge, hips rolling into you as he hungrily kisses you, his firm hands grinding your core on his cock.

His face is a sinful red, panting under you desperately.

"I've been wanting to do this," His voice warbles through your touch, running your thumb along his underside. It's his turn to gasp. He sits up and collapses his lips into yours, softer than rose petals and his taste faintly like wine.

You place your hand on his chest, and his heart is pounding, a thin layer of sweat already forming on his honeylike complexion.

Hastily, you pull your dress over your head and lean back to allow him to familiarize himself with your stark form, a dainty chain hanging between your bosom. Jungkook bites his lips as he wriggles out of his clothing, desposing of it beside the bed.

He's giddy behind those sultry eyes, you know him well enough that he's overexcited to get inside of you. It goes straight to his cock, your playfulness as you feel up his bare shoulders and discover his abdominals, your fingers tracing his ridges with a sense of innocent wonder.

He takes your hands and looks at you in this way-- Butterflies fill your stomach instantly. Jungkook's thumbing at your pout with his intrepid fingers.

His eyes flutter when grip his base and submerge your upper body below his hips. You lick a long, thick stripe up his underside, causing his breath to hitch and his head to fall back on to the bed.

Those goddamn cupid's bow lips of his would whisper the dirtiest things under his breath, lewd thoughts that sounded completely alien coming from His Majesty's mouth, he said for you.

"Oh, such a pretty mouth~ It's so good, y/n, you swallow me so good--" he moaned like a mantra, trying to keep his hips from snapping up into you. Your hot, wet tongue wrapped around his throbbing cock was only a fantasy to him for years.

He fills your throat with his girth, his taste tantalizingly smooth. It leaves your mouth with a 'pop.' You struggle to keep your legs apart as you crawl up to kiss him.

He takes those fingers of his and slides his index and middle into you and languidly thrusts them, smirking against your lips. "Shit, you liked that, hmm..."

"Kookie...please," you whine as he squeezes your ass hard before smacking it. You yelp, the sting of his fingers radiating from your skin.

"I like it when you beg, y/n, it's so cute..." He pulls your ass up to his thighs. He's flush hard against your abdomen, already sticky with his precum and your spit. You marvel at the self control he has.

You don't finish your thought before he has his head inside of you, impaling you on his cock and stretching your entrance, hissing at how incredible it felt to have you around him.

His shaft reached pleasure points within you had yet to discover. You clench, feeling his tip brush against your cervix. "Wh... hngh," he groans, "how did you do that, do it again--" You wrap your legs around his thighs and clench around him, biting your lip. You watch as he shivers from pleasure, feeling his skin horripilate under your touch.

His thumb is softly circling above your clit as he pulls out of you carefully. He swirls back in, nestling himself inside your heat, hissing. "Ahh~ Jungkook~!" At the sound of his first name moaned out of your mouth, he groans and rolls his hips up to create messy friction. That familiar knot in your stomach tingles as he plays with the bundle of nerves buried within you.

He glances up at your ruined lips, clashing with them again as he lifts your knees up with his hands and thrusts nice and rough, making you yell with every jolt of his cock. The smell and sound of sex fills the room as he experiments with positions, laying you on all fours.

"Get your ass up for me." You obey, ever servile. You're reminded-- you're his servant. He owns your work, he owns your services, and now he wants you in the most lucrative way, he wants your soaked cunt around his imperial cock. He gets what he wants.

Jungkook's palms smack against your ass one more time, just to watch the way it jiggles for him. He smirks a little before he shoves himself into your pretty little cunt. You bury your face into the pillows in pelasure as he chases your orgasm with vigor, fingering your clitoris while you move your hips back to meet his hard thrusts.

You whine like a harlot, his cock allowing you every satisfaction as he works a head-spinning orgasm out of that cunt. "I'm gonna cum, Kookie~!" you warn as you spasm against his length, moans ripping from your throat as you coat him with your thick juices.

His hips stutter up and he just barely pulls himself completely from you as he paints your back white, a guttural groan escaping his mouth.

After a while of loud panting and scattered giggling, Jungkook reaches over for a wet cloth and cleans the both of you gingerly. You trail your hands up to caress his jaw and kiss his lips softly.

"You need to tell everyone that I had a long and extensive request for the Harvest party, that I wanted a lot of fall fruits and vegetables featured in the baked goods, make it as specific as possible and make sure that you mention that I want to meet with you again, over dinner." His labored breathing punctuate his words, as youd kisses consume him. "And..."

"And?" You cock an eyebrow, simpering.

"Doyouthinkmaybeyoucouldbringmesomemilktogowithmycake?" He mumbles, eyes glued on the bed.

"What?" (If you give a Kookie a Cookie...)

Disgruntled, he sighs and repeats: "Milk! Milk for my cake. I know it's moist cause you made it but I'm really thirsty, especially after..." His cheeks flush a cute pink. You wait for him to continue just to fluster him a little more. "Y/N, just please!" You can't ever refuse his pouty face.

Next week, Jungkook's got you pinned against the hallway wall, making out with you hungrily as his hands ride up your dress. Just across the hall, his Dad is negotiating war with Portugal over land in the West.

The next month, you have his cock buried in your throat underneath the table at an important conference about how to create jobs.

All this while the pressure for Jungkook to find a bride continues to rise as he reaches seniority, and as his father's grey hairs pronounce themselves.

Warm touches are always hidden away to the public eye, but often shared between two kindred spirits underneath the man in the moon's watchful eye. Jungkook, as he reaches his maturity, grows strong. His jaw sharpens, and his eyes darken. His hair grows long, and he gains weight. Now at the proud age of 20, Jungkook had become a man before everyone's eyes, including the eyes of foreign monarchs and their eligible bachelorettes.

One day, you're serving the Royal family at a private dinner, when the topic of marriage comes up for the first time since his birthday.

"Your mother has made friends with the mother of the Austrian Princess, and she's invited you to the cordial ball to introduce yourself to the Princess. An allyship with Austria would prove advantageous for our relations with France, so you are to make your best impression." The King wipes his mouth. Setting his fork down, he continues: "It is in the family's best interest for you to marry her, if the French Princess, Anastasie, does not present this season or the next." The Queen holds the King's hand firmly, reassuring him from his shoulder. She wears a slight frown on her face, her eyes worrisome, somber. The King hides his anxiety, as he's been accustomed to from decades of responsibility. Would this be the face of Jungkook soon?

For now, Jungkook's face is scrunching at the thought of marrying Anastasie. She's not the most delightful young woman, her imprudence ruined her enjoyment of any event. She couldn't keep an intuitive conversation about regional politics and domestic policy for the life of her. Her people were on the brink of overthrowing the aristocracy, he was sure of it.

"Yes, father," is what you hear from him before you disappear down the stairs to fetch desserts.

Jiyoo interrupts your quest for sweets with a letter, signed by His Grace. She has a naturally innocent demeanor, her cheeks rosy and her frame as delicate as a feather. "Y/N, you have another special request from His Majesty...can I ask you why you get so many of these?" She looks genuinely curious, not a single menacing thought behind those eyes.

"It's because the Prince really really loves his cake." I mean, technically it was true. Jungkook never passed up an opportunity to squeeze, smack, or dig his fingernails into your ass during your sessions.

"Oh." Jiyoo pouts. "So it's not because you're like, in love or anything?" Her eyes are glued to the floor. You were expecting this question eventually, as the other girls in the kitchen were already suspecting it. It was only a matter of time before word slipped into the girl's ears.

"As much as I enjoy the Prince's interest in my baking, it isn't my place to confess any sort of feeling for him." Your answer is straightforward enough, so Jiyoo nods and hands you the letter. Another request.

Outside the Palace, Winter came like the wind. Lakes froze over, and couples tied up their skates and danced on the ice. The trees were bare and brown, not a single leaf persisting through the chilling breath of Jack Frost.

Jungkook had left for the Winter Palace, to volunteer and raise spirits up in the North. As heir to the throne, he was to be Commander in Chief of the Royal Armed Forces, and therefore needed to undergo intensive training in order to boost morale.

You're back home, and in your wake is your father, who has now grown tangibly tired. He's been on a strict diet of warm vegetable soup for about three months, now. His eyes are sunken, but he still wears a subtle smile even during his most trying days.

Match girls make their rounds at night, you watch as the lamplighters illuminate the streets with their tall ladders and their taller peacoats. Shop windows glow warm shades of yellow and creme; inscriptions on the glass create shadows on the white snow.

"Wow. It's almost as cold as the King's heart out here." You step outside one day with a cup of tea, sneaking in a cheeky smirk. Yeah, good one.

"I heard that!" You turn towards the little voice. A child, maybe about 9 or 10 years old is pointing at you. You squint at it.

"Well, it's true..." You mumble. You have a bit of change in your pocket, so you walk towards a stand to buy a hot bun and a paper.

"Chilly today, hon...Best you take this on the house." The tenant hands you a steaming cake wrapped in a simple cloth and your paper. You stick the paper in your dress pocket and take back your change. You nod a 'thank you.'

You spill the contents of your pockets on the dining table and snatch the paper, snapping it open. Your eyes eagerly skim the headline: "Prince Jungkook Fires Up Royal Army." Below is an article detailing the happenings of His Majesty. All of it sounded very intense, the running, strategizing, first aid training...Was there anything Prince Jeon couldn't nail on the first try?

You set the paper down and pick up your now lukewarm tea. In the back of your mind you're coping with the fact that the Spring Solstice is next week, and that marks the beginning of Jungkook's last season as a Prince.

The King is ill with tuberculosis, and recovery is unlikely. If Jungkook is to marry, it is next season and that was final.

Sitting at the window of his Winter Castle study, Jungkook plays with a ring nestled between his fingers. He looks out onto the lake, as if he's trying to reach you with his gaze. His heart is tight knowing that it would be the season he chooses his bride. Actually, he'd already made up his mind long ago. If his duty was to marry, there was no way to evade such a responsibility. He had to fulfill it, despite his anxieties.

He straightens up and walks out of the hollow room with a firm step.

You awaken with the sound of horse's hooves thudding against the Earth. It is yet to be dawn, and in the distance, thunder roars mightily.

A figure wearing a long, black hood hoists itself off of the animal, tying it to a nearby post. It walks towards an obscure entrance, unknown to many staff.

Intrigued, you wrap a blanket around yourself and peek out at the stranger. His fingers are shorter than his palms, and that's when he tosses of his hood, his eyes set on you. "Y/N..."

You're bewildered by his guise, questions filling your head.

"I was horny, so I left camp" He sits down at the counter, catapulting a cookie into his mouth.

You roll your eyes. "And the guards let you?! Jungkook!" You whisper-yelled at him, readjusting your makeshift blanket-dress.

"Obviously not!" He puffed out his chest with pride. "I bribed them," he smirks.

"You're insufferable," you scoff, your eyes wandering down to observe his physique. His shirt is anything but conservative, highlighting the muscle he'd earned through laborious, sweat-inducing drills. You can feel his eyes on your face as you observe him.

"You can't hide it either," he crosses his arms. "You're standing in the kitchen with a blanket around your naked body." He flicks his tongue. He steps forward, putting a finger under your jaw so you're looking him in the eye.

Your eyes fill with lust as he speaks over your lips. "Look at yourself..." A crash is heard in the other room.

Jungkook's head darts up and in a flash, he disappears into the night.

'Fuck.' You gather your dress from the floor and shuffle back to your chamber.

The first event of the season commences with the most exaltant of spirits as friends of old greet each other with youthful smiles. Juicy exposés, enticing tales, and thoughtful greetings are exchanged in the most formal manner, and the conversation is lively; the most controversial topic of conversation, however, is the rumor that Jungkook is to marry this season.

So far, he's been to four different private residences within his own Kingdom and has been invited, by the secretary of King Louis XVII to meet their daughter. It would be an understatement to say that stakes were high for the pending King.

You were kneading your dough a little too hard thinking about it. "Not so rough, y/n!" Ms.Kang snatches the mixture from your hands. "What is up with you lately, you're so tense! It's really disrupting the kitchen's dynamic."

You shrug it off. "It's going to be hard sedating Anastasie's sweet tooth, I suppose."

"Well, you seem to be doing just fine dealing with Jungkook's addiction to cakes...She's perfect for him, really." Ms.Kang throws more flour on your kneading table and steps off. You give up on the dough, covering it with a cloth and letting it rise.

Jungkook is tapping his feet, munching on finger sandwiches as he waits on you to make an appearance.

"Dearest Prince, look, I am wearing Mediterranean violet!" A duchess shouts as she passes by him, to which he raises his eyebrows at. Another, with dark green eyes approaches and begins speaking rapidly in French at him. Frightened and undereducated, his canned response was: "Excusez-moi, Pouvez-vous répéter plus lentement s'il vous plaît," to which the duchess furrows her eyebrows before something else catches her attention, elsewhere.

Truth is, Jungkook is incredibly shaken at the thought of announcing his engagement tonight. Well, that and the fact that you had yet to pop out of the kitchen. Man, those finger sandwiches were good.

As the night progresses, Jungkook realizes that if he doesn't get up on that platform and say what he needed to say, he'd have to say it in London. Setting his fears aside, he plants himself on top of the orchestral stage and taps a champagne glass with a cheese fork. The music comes to a stop.

With conviction, he begins: "The time has come that I announce my engagement. To all of my beloved friends, who have introduced me to the most beautiful, talented, diverse, and benevolent ladies I've come to get to know over the years, I thank you from the depths of my soul." He swallows and continues, his confident voice masking his trembling. "The life of a Prince is defined by the virtues presented to him at birth. Those virtues are: duty, responsibility, grace, kindness, mercy and integrity." Here comes the part, oh shit.

"I am abdicating my throne to my Cousin, the Duke of Namseong."

Silence sweeps the room. You poke your head out to see what was going on.

"...to marry the love of my life, y/n." He points at you. Your face is cherry red, and you find yourself dropping those same Danish fucking pastries all over the carpet.

"Shit," you fall on your knees, plucking them from the ground one by one. You don't know whether to run as fast as you can or to present yourself, but your body seems to be currently doing the latter. You go along with it.

Jungkook takes your hand tenderly on the stage. "I am unable to perform my duties as King, and therefore am ineligible for the throne." His touch gives you the will to continue beside him. You feel the pure fear rushing through your love's veins, and he knows that this is the hardest thing he'll ever have to do, yet he stands by his announcement.

So, if Jungkook doesn't get to be King of this World, he at least will forever be the King of Your Heart.

But all this, of course...is all in Your, dear reader, Head.

a/n:

hope you enjoyed.

572 notes · View notes

neocrush · 3 years

Text

— the girl groups enhypen’s gfs are in !

genre: fluff (angst on jungwon’s part) + established relationship (eventually lol)

pairings: idol!enhypen x fem!idol!reader

note: idk how to title this pls i thought of it while showering

tagging: @jeminiepabo @strwberrydinosaur

you just finished performing and your members were in need of water bottles

but fucking mnet didn’t provide any inside of your dressing room??

so yves told you to ask for some from the artist in the dressing room next to yours

you knocked on the door without looking at the sign that showed who was in there

you asked for some water bottles and heeseung went “i’ll go get it!” and ran off to go get get them

jungwon just chuckled and went “hyung’s a really huge fan of your group, he kept on singing star on the way here”

you nodded at the younger one, impressed at the fact that you were popular among idols

the tall boy came back with a whole box full of water bottles

“there’s 12 of you here right now so i figured why not get a whole box” he chuckled nervously

you giggled and smiled at the nervous boy

“thank you heeseung-ssi, i’ll take this to my members” you took the box in your hands but was taken aback on how heavy it was

“don’t worry i’ll carry it for you”

long after that you started hanging out and boom you became his gf

you couldn’t resist the charms of lee heeseung

once it was revealed that you were a couple, orbits and engenes went INSANE (in a good way ofc)

“wait so y/n DOESNT hate men????”

★ jay - aespa

OMG OMG LEMME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS BBY

you both met at school after you both debuted

everyone was gossiping around about how you were in the same class with the enhas

so like... monster rookies class

usually idols aren’t seated together but the teacher seated you and jay next to each other

causing a bunch of “oooohhhs” from your classmates

there were times were you and the enhas would leave school early due to practice or schedules

and on the way to the school gate, jay would always spark up a conversation with you

you assumed he was just very friendly

long story short he had a massive crush on you

so a few months into your friendship (which the both of you were very open about with your fans), he confesses

you were like “WAIT SO IT WASNT ONE SIDED THE WHOLE TIME”

y’all were just really blind lol pls read between the lines

anyways on to ur lovely bf !!

he’s so bold and brave around you but so shy around your members and seniors

we all know how he really respects nct (along with other sm artists) bc he covered the 7th sense with sunghoon on iland

so one day you were like “oh btw i showed taeyong sunbae you and hoon’s t7s cover”

he was like 😟 to 😧 to 😯

got all shy and was like “oh what did he say..”

you don’t know why he was acting as if he didn’t body that whole performance ????

anyway you told him that taeyong said that he and hoon did really well and that he liked how jay did his part

hid his face on the crook of your neck

“baby we should come say hi to them next time you go to sm”

“NO i will make a fool out of myself”

speaks english and japanese with giselle a lot when he isn’t occupied with you

sometimes you’d even have to ask nct’s shotaro to translate

your seniors (especially exo’s kai) adore him so so much pls protect the boy at all costs

★ jake - everglow

he was an active viewer of produce 48 and (like me) was really attached to the yuehua trainees

especially you

so when you got eliminated just before the last episode, he was devastated to say the least

he awaited your debut and when the time came he supported everglow !!!!

LOVED BON BON CHOCOLAT SO MUCH

does the killing part choreo in his room when no one’s watching lol

dies everytime you do the little “everglow” in songs

right so when he debuted in enha, he looked forward to meeting you as an idol and not a fan

when you shared a dressing room at kcontact, he couldn’t help but introduce himself to you

he mentioned he was a big fan and your heart warmed

cute boy is a fan of you? omg heart go brr brr

your members tease you and you just shake it off

that day when you got back to the dorms, you watched a bunch of enhypen videos bc you were interested in jake

you weren’t aware of how popular you were among people - let alone idols so you were surprised

you fell in love with his personality and started saying hi to him whenever you meet backstage at music shows

not long after, you develop feelings for him

you thought it was just a puppy crush but as you saw him even more, it got serious

you never actually confessed but aisha accidentally spilled the beans when he was passing by

“cmon y/n just tell him you like him because he clearly feels the same !!”

“you like me?”

“AISHA”

“that’s my queue to leave”

so she leaves you two to pour your hearts out to each other

you two become a couple and forevergenes (such a cute name omg) LOVE you two

you’re both the puppies of your group so that makes your relationship 103892x cuter

you met his parents and they adore you and even asked for your autograph

“jake used to talk about how great you are after every produce 48 episode”

“okayyyy i think that’s enough embarassing me mom”

his parents love you like their own daughter but does layla love you?

you were so nervous to meet her and was actually scared she might not like you - knowing how important layla is to jake

at first layla ignored you and jake was like “she’ll come around”

you were convinced she just doesn’t like you, until this one time you were cuddling with jake on the couch and layla comes in

you expected her to snuggle up with jake but she came to you :D

now layla is super fond of you and mrs sim would even send you pictures and videos of layla getting excited whenever you were on tv 🥺

★ sunghoon - itzy

you and the girls were at isac

the six of you were just waving at your fans and making heart signs with your hearts

on your left you saw yeji making hearts with ryujin so you wanted to do that with another member too

you felt a presence next to you and assumed it was someone from your group

spoiler alert: it wasn’t

sunghoon and sunoo were waving at engenes who just happened to be seated next to midzys

so you turned to who you thought was an itzy member, making half a heart with your hand

until you realized it wasn’t 💀

you bowed and apologized when you both looked at each other, you were scared you crossed a boundary

you bowed and apologized to the engenes who were there too

sunghoon and sunoo reassured you it was all good

after that, sunghoon couldn’t help but keep his eyes on you the entire event

when the day was coming to an end, he pulled some strings and ended up having some alone time with you ...in stray kids’ dressing room

don’t ask

ofc skz already left so it was just you two there

fast forward, you both hit it off and he became your bf <3

midzys and engenes love you both sm and love bragging about you two to other fandoms

you two were even named the king and queen of 4th gen kpop

oh also

you already know where this is going

“SUNGHOON HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW NOT SHY’S PROPER TITLE IT’S YOUR GIRLFRIEND’S SONG” - jay

brags about how he can do the shoulder dance in wannabe

ofc it’s bc you personally taught him

sends you pics of jyp as reaction pics

so you send pics of bang pdnim to him

every once in a while he reminds you of that video of jay why pee trying to hit a high note

“lmao that’s your boss”

PLS you always get super embarrassed so ofc you bring up that vid of hitman bang

“rAp dAncE-“

★ sunoo - stayc

you were his seatmate at school predebut

you came from the same town, same school, same neighborhood, etc

the two of you were extremely close and both shared the same dream

when highup entertainment accepted you, the both of you were over the moon

he was so happy for you

but sad too bc that meant you had to move to seoul :(

you promised him to do your best and that you hoped to see him again but as an idol

and hopefully when he’s an idol too

well what you hoped for came true !!

although you couldn’t see him much as a trainee - which made you quite sad - you got to follow his journey on i-land

you even asked your fellow trainees to vote for him

anyways now that you both debuted, you became close again and became really open with your fans on how close you were

you recommended his songs to swiths and he did the same to engenes

he even memorized the choreo to so bad and asap and lemme tell you this

he BEGGED you to teach him those choreos

“sunoo you can watch the practice on youtube”

“but i want to learn it from you”

he never really realized his feelings until he saw you getting shipped with his other members

you were both on weekly idol and the hosts really seemed to like how you and jake looked next to each other and they just teased you both the whole episode

that made sunoo feel uneasy and he thought it was only bc he was an overprotective best friend

turns out he had feelings for you (wow shocker)

so one day he asks you to come to hybe

after slightly getting lost, you meet up with him in a practice room

he confesses bc he felt like not telling you about his feelings would put a wall between you two

you appreciate his honesty and tell him you’ve felt the same way every since you were classmates

he scolds himself for not seeing it all those years but you just laugh it off bc you were pretty good at hiding your crush

you both agree to secretly date, until you both announce it on your five month anniversary

fans were really shocked at first... but they support you !!!!

engenes will not hesitate to come at anyone who talks bad about you and swiths feels the same way about jungwon

he gushes about you every single time you’re brought up

and you can’t help but love your adorable boyfriend

★ jungwon - iz*one

okay so

he was just an average high schooler when you were introduced on produce 48

his deskmate was watching your audition video and it was the part where you were doing this freestyle

he was SO amazed and he secretly followed your journey on produce 48

always made sure to vote on time and watch the episodes live

once the debut evaluation came around, he asked everyone he knew to vote for you and even bought tickets to see the show live

almost cried when he saw that you were center

ACTUALLY CRIED when you got into the top 13 😭

fast forward to him debuting in enha

he wasn’t able to catch up on you since he was busy with trainee life, then i-land, then debut preparations

but somehow in the middle of promotions he ran into you and BOOM love at first sight

fast forward to you finally dating, he couldn’t believe he was dating the y/n of iz*one

wizones make those “ladies and gentlemen, y/n’s man” edits and engenes make those “ladies and gentlemen, jungwon’s woman” edits

both fandoms love you two so dearly that the only hate you two got were from the delusional ones (who clearly aren’t actual fans)

when your last concert came around, he couldn’t bare seeing you cry when you said “this has been iz*one’s y/n, thank you everyone!”

he got flashbacks from when you cried during the final episode of produce 48 and he’s just.. sobbing bc he couldn’t be there to hold you

so the next day he rushed to your dorms with snacks and emotional support bc you were emotionally exhausted from accepting the fact that your journey with iz*one is finally ending

you felt extremely lucky to be in his arms and he felt extremely lucky too that he’s able to make you feel a little better

★ riki - weeekly

you were both on weekly weeekly idol together

and both you and riki being main dancers, you were asked to do random dance together

a few popular songs played and the both of you did the choreos

until after school started playing and the boy did the chorus’ choreo and you were like “woah???”

bc he was so INTO ITTTT

the song was basically made for him to cover it

and the mcs saw your reaction so they asked him to do it once again but this time with the whole group

after filming, he came up to you and was like “i’m a huge fan of yours” and you’re just like ):&/£]>\**_£]

“woah really???? i rooted for you on i-land”

and his face just lights up bc his huge crush on you developed even more

you became besties since then but he didn’t ask you out until your birthday

he took you out to a puppy café, knowing you were obsessed with dogs

you’d ask him to show you pictures and videos of bisco

“i better meet bisco once we go to japan together”

melted at the thought of traveling to his hometown with you

anyways

once you left the café, he kissed you in front of your dorms

and somehow he became your boyfriend <3

riki as a bf isn’t really a very public person

he’s the “this is our relationship, not the public’s” type of person

he doesn’t wanna risk companies wanting to exploit your relationship

although he doesn’t talk about you two much, he loves to brag about you when given the chance

whenever variety show hosts would fawn over you he’d just look them in the eyes dead and go “she’s mine”

950 notes · View notes

vavuska · 3 years

Text

Who changed Lola Bunny?

Malcolm D. Lee explained, “This is 2021. It’s important to reflect the authenticity of strong, capable female characters. … So we reworked a lot of things, not only her look, like making sure she had an appropriate length on her shorts and was feminine without being objectified, but gave her a real voice. For us, it was, ‘Let’s ground her athletic prowess, her leadership skills, and make her as full a character as the others.'”

(See the complete interview here: X)

So, gone are her curves, thigh-high drawstring shorts and midriff-baring crop top. Instead, Lola Bunny now takes on a sportier look wearing a more standard basketball vest and leggings under her track shorts.

But, let's see more deeply what determinated this choice:

1. Being mad at a fan art is sad, people.

Before, a sad 50 yo guy starts complaing about how "cancel culture" or "politically correct" ruined his life - Really? Changing a cartoon bunny from a movie you didn't see for a decade ruined your life? Wow. Someone should really review the list of their priorities -, let's see how really Lola looked in the 1996 original Space Jam.

Here we have original Lola Bunny:

(Here you can see all Lola's scenes in Space Jam: X)

Yes, Lola walked in a sexy way that show off her curves, or at least she seemed to have curves (a little breast, tight waist, long legs, bootie), but those are not big as in the fan art you are seeing around, and Lola's curves are not evidenced during the match or when she played. Is more her attitude and posture that made her look sexy. However, althought her curves clearly changes every time she is doing something different, from action to action, there are some scenes in which she is purposely made sexy, with saxophone music as soundtrack and male-gaze sections that ends in the same way, Lola surrounded by a bunch of horny and howling cartoon guys.

That's appropriate with Jessica Rabbit: she is purposely made and designed as a parody of the femme fatale from old hard boiler movies, in which attractive, mysterious women were portrayed as evil and manipulative gals who hide criminal intentions. Jessica, with her intentionally exaggerated body, subverted the misogyny of 40s and 30s detective movies: she is kind-hearted, truly loves her naive and goofy husband Roger and uses her powers (beauty and cunning) to protect him. Her body too is used for comic sketches, while this not happens for Lola, that's just a serious and indipendent basketball player. So, the male obsession for her body is out of place, expecially because she reacted with anger at being misconsidered only for being an attractive female bunny. “Don't call me doll” is her catch phrase. So, it seems strange she didn't react at all at the very sexualized presentation at the final basketball match: Lola simply shows her basketball skills, ignoring or accepting passively the reaction of the honey crowd of wolves around her. (Please, notice the association: Lola “admirers” are wolves, predators, while Lola, their object of desire, is a rabbit, a prey)

This is the cartoon version of cat calling: they are like a group of men who sit on their porches and whistle at girls everyday when they walk in from of them. A normal girl or woman would pass over this thing, even if they are bothered, unconfortable or embarassed, because they are more scared by a possible violent reaction of this whistling horny guys at their legitimate anger objections. But here, we are talking of Lola, a strong Looney Tunes bunny, and she could smash that damn basket ball on wolves' face, breaking all their teeth. That would be very a Looney reaction. But Lola doesn't react at all at this situation. Here, on my opinion, screenplayers missed an opportunity, but probably they thought to have already did too much with Lola's personality and “girl power”.

Remember also that Lola is the only young cartoon female character we see in the whole movie. So we can't do a proper comparison with other female relevant characters' rapresentation. (See here for a deeper analysis of Lola's origin and development: X)

However, compared with Bugs, Lola looks more fit, more humanized than Bugs. Lola has clearly a definited breast and booty, but it looks like is more her posture that makes them relevant. Lola has clearly shoulders back to show the rack. Bugs is anthropomorphic but remains an animal, has no shoulders or pectorals more like a human and looks a bit over-weight (fat belly). And his posture don't keep that stomach in, chin up, and march forward.

Lola, on the other hand, has a more human structure. That's why I say she has curves. An example are Mickey and Minnie who are two beans in the same way it is not that Mickey is a bean and Minnie has small tits, they are structurally alike.

Lola's body remembers highly No-Ribs-Jasmine from Aladdin (see the gif for reference). That unrealistic Barbie-like waist that was so popular in the 90s and 80s. (See here for references: X and X)

Now, we are changed a lot from the past 24 years. Barbies didn't have that impossible, unrealistic waist-line anymore, Disney princess concept has changed (see Merida and Moana).

Lola concept is changed in 2012: her design for the new cartoons is totally different and her personality too. She wear a blue or violet dress, almost flat-chested and she was made annoying and silly, just to make a contrast with Bugs smarter. Just like Daffy Duck is dumb as hell and his new girlfriend, Tina Russo (no more dear old Melissa Duck), is way smarter than him. Tina is tough, street-smart, rebellious and feisty. But we will see this thing in the next point.

2. People on the upper floors hated Lola personality.

Lola Bunny had only few lines in Space Jam, but she definitely passed the first impression that she was draw only for make male characters fall in love. Lola was a good basketball player and show it off, in front of a skeptical and then astonish bunch of cartoon guys and also Michael Jordan. She also had a strong personality and said it clear to Bugs she didn't like being called "doll". Lola was beauty and curvy, but not a cheerleader. Lola was a basketball player. Remember this part, because we will talk about basketball in the next point.

If at the box office Space Jam was a success, at Warner Bros there were those who turn up their noses, and they are important people, from the upper floors, who accused the film with Michael Jordan of having completely distorted the philosophy of the Looney Tunes. They blamed Lola Bunny more than everything else. Producers of Warner Bros said she was too perfect for the moody group of Warner cartoons: she was too sensual, provocative and independent, totally alien to that core of crazy characters that act as an exaggeration of the vices of 'man.

And fans hated her too. Chuck Jones, creator of the Merrie Melodies said: "Lola Bunny is a character with no future, she’s a totally worthless character with no personality."

So, Lola Bunny was deleted. Lola would make only some brief apparitions in some comics edited by DC Comics, in Baby Looney Tunes, in which she was a toddler with a very similar personality and resemblance to Space Jam adult version, and also as playable character in some unsuccessful videogames.

Years passed and projects for a sequel of Space Jam never become reality, so in 2003 Warner Bros relased Looney Tunes Back in Action. But Lola wasn't here, because the movie purposely want to make a deep cut with what we saw in Space Jam, according to what said it's director Joe Dante. This movie was a totally failure, but it gave back to Looney Tunes their craziness.

Years passed again, but this time is 2011, 10th of May on Cartoon Network was relased the second episode of The Looney Tunes Show. The series aimed to strongly relaunch the Looney Tunes, long gone from the glories of the past, updating the stories of Bugs Bunny and associates in a sitcom key, with the rabbit sharing a house with Daffy Duck in a suburb of Los Angeles. All interspersed with sketches by Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner done in CGI and the updated return of the Merrie Melodies. But the big news of the second episode is that LOLA BUNNY RETURNED.

And Lola was a character with some relevance within the series, even if something didn't seem right with her. Lola looked different, she was no longer the rabbit version of the femme fatale seen in Space Jam: she was naive, talkative, with her head in the clouds, crazy to the point of becoming Bugs Bunny's stalker. Bugs after having fallen in love with her at first glance understands on the first date that he absolutely can't stand Lola. She is no longer the Lola we used to know, even if the appearance is similar and the name is the same. Lola is effectively a Looney Tunes now. And the fans like her, the public like her, Warner Bros like her.

(See Lola in The Looney Tunes Show here: X)

But this is a big walk in behind from the indipent character we used to know in Space Jam. Lola was turned into the stereotype of the crazy girlfriend for a while. And this is not a surprise, if we remember that in 2012 were popular the "overly attached girlfriend" meme template. (See here for references: X)

However, in The Looney Toons Show Lola has some very funny moments, while in Space Jam she was more serious and a little out of space among the other characters. (See here for references: X)

3. What women wear when they play basketball?

Women's National Basketball Association was only created in 1996. So, women's basketball were not considered - and still is not considered - as important as men's basketball at the time Space Jam was filmed.

In Space Jam 2 there will be WNBA players with a significant role, for example Diana Taurasi and Nneka Ogwumike.

Professional female athletes aren't that curvy because curves are determined by body fat and they have a little.

As a busty volleyball player, I can say, dear people, breats could be very annoying during sport activities: it could be a pain, when you run or jump. That's because a lot of women wear sport bra to compress and support their breast. Sports bra may also include layered cups or a high neck to keep everything in place and protect from painful hits, so women can be safe and comfortable during workouts.

Female basketball players didn't wear crop-tops and tight shorts to play. They wear exactly what Lola wears in the picture above: long sleeveless tees, large shorts and maybe protective gears such as knee pads, sleeves or braces to reduce chronic pain caused by the immense burden put on the knees in basketball, to prevent bruises caused by collisions and hard fall and to provide support after a significant knee injury like an ACL tear. They could wear also compressive arms sleeves to help muscles that are sore or overworked to recover faster. The sleeve enables your blood flow to circulate quicker to the heart, which helps you heal and recover quicker.

Wow. WNBA wears Exactly what wear NBA players. So surprising.

4. This is only a promotional character sketch, not what Lola would look in the movie.

Space Jam 2 would be developed in CGI and there are a little preview frames going around, included one showing Lola jumping and you can see her breast shape. But she totally looks like a comic cartoon character. It's not humanized. It's not designed to be the sexy love interest. She doesn't look out of space among the others anymore, expecially because seems that there would be also Tweety's Granny and Melissa Duck or Tina Russo as players too.

5. Reality.

Really? You want a human anthropomorphic rabbit? Well, Lola as a rabbit would have something like six nipples, but no human-like breast. And, also, real life girls have ribs. No one in real life is that thin. Oh, well, if you don't considered Pixee Fox, a model who had surgically removed six ribs and wears daily a compressive bust corset (yes, like the one that made Elizabeth Swan faint in the first movie of Pirate of the Caribbean) to look like a cartoon fairy (Tinkerbell, you are the one to blame for this).

(See here for references: X)

In conclusion, we can say that all this controversy is based only on a porny fan art and that Lola “new” graphic isn't change too much from the original Space Jam movie. It's just a little more cartoonish.

We can also firmly remeber that Space Jam 2 is going to be developed for children, to relunch Looney Tunes among new generations of children, who are the largest buyers of merchandising (including Happy Meals surprises) and consumers of new cartoons that surely would be developed, if Space Jam 2 would be a success.

However, we should admit that those kids probably know better the 2011 version of Lola than her original version and that 2011 version was more appreciated by fans and producers. Lola's voice actress, Kristen Wiin won BTVA People's Choice Voice Acting Award in 2012 and was nominated for that prize also about three times in the following years. Also Rachel Ramras, Lola's voice actor was nominated for BTVA People's Choice Voice Acting Award in 2016 for her role in Looney Tunes: Rabbit Run.

We don't know anything about Lola's personality in Space Jam 2, so we can't do a proper comparison or a prevision, but, according to what Malcolm D. Lee said, we can assume that original personality of Lola would be preserved.

The controversy is relevant only for Lola's body and not for her personality, and that's is highly rappresentative of what impressed more this bunch of grow-up kids. They grow up to be like the horny wolves and they are howling because their prey is not available anymore.

And, to be honest, being so obsessed with the breast and the body of a cartoon character (that is clearly made up for kids) it's not sane at all. Sorry to say that, but sometimes people need to drink from a bottle of truth.

208 notes · View notes

popculturebuffet · 4 years

Text

Mission Hill Review: Plan 9 From Mission Hill or I Married a Gay Man From Outer Space!

Commission for @weirdkev27. Hallowen Havoc marches on! For my first commission ever, I take a look at the cult classic mission hill’s final produced episode and one of it’s most loved. Kevin’s visit to an x rated movie pays off less with boobs and more with a friendship with his elderly gay neighbor and film buff wally and a new appreciation for cinema, only for this new friendship to nearly end over Kevin’s good natured attempt to spotlight Wally’s only film, the man from pluto. Gay spaceman, a touching gay love story, and a surprisingly likeable guy with a neckbeard insue. Spoilers and full recap FROM PLUTO, under the cut.

Well this was a nice suprise. After the utterly draining process of my review of “Let’s Get Dangerous”, it was a nice suprise to find out one of my handful of fans had tried to comission me a while back and I hadn’t realized it, and I was happy to oblige him. I was even happier when I found out what his commission was: Plan 9 From Mission HIll, an episode i’d planned to cover for pride but got squeezed out due to how little i’d planned the month out in advance, a lesson I still REALLY need to learn. Regardless not only was it a nice, funny, and heartwarming ep to cover after the sheer amount of analysis and recapping the last one took, I realized it ended up fitting the spooky season, as there’s just as much fun to be had in truly fantastic horror movies like “Nightmare on Elm Street”, “Get Out”, “Child’s Play”, “Tales from the Hood” and “The Thing” as there is from so bad it’s great horror films like “House (The Japanese one), C.H.U.D. II: Bud The Chud, Terror Toons and House Shark. Seriously watch House Shark i’ts hilarious. Hell I fully plan on watching the Gary Busey film Hider in the House tomorrow. I mean it’s a film about hollywood’s favorite nutball living in the walls and attic of someone’s house. What’s not to love? Maybe it might be entirely boring but that’s the risk you sometimes take to find so bad it’s gold filmaking. Plus cheeestastic films like these are the reason we have the classsic and incomprable mystery science theater 3000 and it’s succesor rifftrax. So while I need to watch more of them, I have a spot in my likely overtaxed heart for this kind of film, and as a result this episode resonated with me on rewatch in a way it didn’t the first time around, even if it was still my faviorite.

Backing up a bit as usual I like to give my history with a show first time covering it: Mission HIll was one of a handful of shows picked up by Adult Swim in it’s early days. Since most of Adult Swim’s early originals were 11 minutes at a time when this was still a new and radical thing they were doing having 11 minute shows that weren’t sold as half hour pairs of 11 minute episodes, they likely needed more shows to fill up the air and clevelry simply bought the rights to several shows that had only had one season, along with Family Guy and Futurama which as history would bear out both made the shows into huge names in the animation industry but brought both back.. though in Family Guy’s case sometimes dead is better. Point is, several shows got a second life thanks to Cartoon Network if sadly not more seasons, with the sole exception of the utter classic Home Movies which I really need to talk about at some point, and thus are really more associated with Adult Swim than their original networks. Hell before doing this review I genuinely didn’t know what Mission HIll’s original networks. But now you know the framework this show came out in what IS Mission Hill anyway?

MIssion Hill was a cartoon from the wonderful brains of Bill Oakely and Josh Weinstein, no relation to the MST3K one who due to this confusion now goes by J. Elvis Weinstein instead, who showran the simpsons and did some great episodes, my faviorte of there’s being $pringfield, aka the casino one.

youtube

The show was about Andy, a 24 year old slacker whose happily lazing about after college in his loft with his friends Jim, a stoic but friendly stoner played by Brian Posehn, and Posey, a sensitive hippie. However when he goes to pickup his childhood dog he ends up with an unexpected roomate: His nerdy, sheltered and neurotic brother Kevin, who has a love of sci fi, a type a personality and a habit of going bling blong to focus when studying or just whenever. He’s also voiced by future robin and future psychopath claming to be robin Scott Mellinville. Also in the building are Carlos and Natalie, an unemployed artist and college professor and their baby Nameless. I forgot they existed. And of course saving the best for last we have the brother’s neighbors, and a very early gay couple for animated television Wally and Gus, played by the legendary Tom Kenny and Nick Jameson who hasn’t done much of note but does a great job anyway. Wally is a fastudious, Gus is angry and very brooklyn, but the two genuinely love each other, makeout frequently, with their first showing off the two as a gay couple, and are an adorable but very beliviable couple. It’s part of WHY I wanted to spotlight them. The late 90′s/early 2000′s, the show originally aired in 99 and into 2000 and aired on adult swim in the early 2000 for the curious, were not a great time to be gay in animation with most gay characters used as punchlines and hardly any queer stories. Not only that but just a year earlier will and grace had to have one overly camp chracter and one “regular” gay character in order to get made. Granted that show has it’s issues but still, the point stands having a gay couple that plays fairly realistically, is shown to both be sexually active and love each other and who’ve been together for decades was a hell of a step for a medium where Family Guy around the same time had a joke with the punchline “Whoa transvestite back off!” Granted Family Guy would do far worse to both the gay and trans communities, but we’ll get to that someday. Or sooner if you commission me, but I swear if you do I will pull a gary busey on your house. Point is not only is it INCREIDBLY forward for it’s time but it holds up even now. There’s a reason the creators are working on a spinoff/revivial focused on the two and a reason these two tend to be one of the most talked about elements of the show. That and frankly their hilarious having realistic banter.. and also having one episode where Gus has a knife in his head for a whole episode. It helps that this episode, their spotlight one and the last one produced, is also one fo the series best. So with all that build up let’s take a look shall we?

We open with Kevin passing a theater showing x rated movies and are shown, over a bunch of times of him passing it him condeming it publicly but his tone clearly telegraphing the classic battle between a teenage boy and his dick. Dick wins and Kevin heads inside and gives us... this.

.... If you will excuse me, please enjoy the musical stylings of the late great Zorak while I go shower the “EeEEEEEEUUUUGGggggggHHHhhuuuuuuggghhhhhhhhewwwwuuuuugggghhhhggooooodddddddwwwyyyyyy” off me.

youtube

God rest his soul. Okay i’m good now. Thankfully this isn’t an episode about Kevin getting addicted to x-rated theater, and they already did an episode about him masturbating. No really it actually had a good message as Kevin was so embarassed about the incident, he nearly let two other guys, granted not remotley good people who were stealing from there anyway, take the fall. Andy even ends up giving a great speech coming to his defense

“People, you mock this boy, but it's your fault he's here today. Your hypocrisy has made this boy a prisoner, terrified of his own sexuality. So much so that he'd rather send two relatively-innocent men to prison than admit he looks at pornography! He thinks his natural urges are filthy and perverted, and why? Because of your conspiracy of silence! Nobody dares admit the truth - that you're all just like him!”

IT’s a damn good moment and a good message. That sadly is still relevant as America still views sex as worse than violence for some weird reason. At least he has the internet now. Anywho when Kevin goes to see what’s up he runs into Wally who explains the confusion: He’s just showing old “X-Rated films”. Now some of you are probably wondering “Wait non-porn films used to use that?” Or “Wait what’s an x-rating?” Well while I knew some films did used to do that I was honestly curious myself as to why it was retired and why porn films got to use it and took a quick hop to google to find out reading both the wikipedia article for the rating and this vulture article on the subject to get a slightly deeper look at it.

It’s actually quite intresting as I genuinelly also didn’t know when the MPAA ratings started for films: When the rating’s board started in 1968 there were four raitings: G, GP (Later flipped to PG), R and X. X was the modern equivlent of today’s R really, and films like Last Tango in Paris, Midnight Cowboy and a Clockwork Orange, with Orange even having a poster up at the cinema in this episode and Midnight Cowboy being part of the plot very soon. We’ll get to that in the moment. Point is it allowed filmakers to push the envelope break barriers all that good stuff and makes me curious about those very films, which is a good thing as i’ll admit to not being exactly a film buff. But as Kevin’s confusion here shows, eventually the porn industry took a hold of it, using the X as a way to get sex movies into regular cinemas and have an air of legitimacy, hence why Debbie Does Dallas was a mainstream hit.. and yes that’s an actual film that I only know about thanks to I Love the 70′s. If your wondering why the MPAA just couldn’t you know, tell them to know or why they didn’t take over other ratings it turns out for some weird reason why the G and R ratings were owned by them, and later PG , they forgot to trademark X and by the time they even thought of it it was too late. Hence terms like XXX rated and what not or the ungodly stupid XXX porn parodies. Just.. just give them actual names and slap “A porn parody” ont he end if you want to avoid a lawsuit. Naturally the film industry struck back and X soon went from a way to have daring, interesting films.. to basically a threat by the MPAA that your film wouldn’t be carried by any major distributors if it had one, with Dawn of the Dead having to just go unrated just to get distributed. The 80′s brought the killing stroke: With the rise of big theater chains, mall theaters with restrictions I wasn’t aware of, and big home video outlets like blockbuster that didn’t carry porn, the x rating was well and truly dead and the MPAA lukewarmly added NC-17 which serves the same bullshit purpose as theaters still refuse to carry them and the MPAA still uses it for essenitally the same reason. Nothing changed! If your wondering why people sometimes have problems with the MPAA, yeah there’s your answer, as they could’ve campaigned harder for NC-17 but clearly enjoyed having a raiting to hold over films heads.

So yeah if you don’t know, know you know bud, let’s move on. So yeah Wally explains the confusion and decides to educate Kevin on film by showing him Midnight Cowboy, with John Voight “Before his head looked like a radish” and Dustin Hoffman. Also Andy brings up Sphere.. a film I also know nothing about. Hang on... checking Letterboxd and okay. It’s a Dustin Hoffman starring Sci-Fi film about a research team investigating a mysterious sphere at the bottom of the sea. Huh.. I prefer Cube myself but to each his own. But once Kevin clams up he really enjoys it. Will grant the episode lays it on a tad thick, with Kevin comparing the film to , of all things, Armageddon. I mean I get MIcheal Bay is a good metric for crowd pleasing schlock but still, even nerds have standards. My standards aren’t very high at times mind as I still want to watch this sometime today.

But I still think even awkward teens have better standards. Then again one of my faviorite films at the time was Saving Silverman which while I can’t hate it due to nostalgia , having watched it from 5th grade well into my teens, I can see was not very good. Though it did have R. Lee Ermy being both really funny and turning out to be gay so that was awesome.

youtube

And he does make a good point that heroes like Ratzzo Rizzo don’t go well on Taco Bell cups.. though it also feels weird to me in 2020 where while not big sellers films with deep stories and unlikeable heroes are some of the biggest on tv and one of them was one of the greatest animated series of the last decade, so things must’ve been pretty damn bleak in 1999. The two also run into Gus who wants dinner and a fight ensues between the couple about the fact Gus owns a restraunt, could just bring his lunch etc. It’s hilarious and as I said I like how they feel like a couple you’d meet in real life. Sadly I don’t have an elderly gay couple in my neighborhood but here’s hoping. Or maybe i’ll be the neighborhoods wally when I grow up who knows. Also Tom Kenny’s delivery is great.

Kevin later relays his fun day to his loftmates, with Andy expressing genuine suprise at Wally’s job and love of art house cinema, as none of them knew what he actually did. Andy’s genuinely shocked and mildly appalled they’ve lived near Wally for so long but having no idea what he does.. but really I had a sweet old lady, Delores who lived next to me for almost my entire life before she moved to be closer to her family, visited her house frequently pet her cats, went to her house after school at one point.. and I cannot tell you what he did, so it’s incredibly relatable. However in a scene that’s both hilarious but also really, really sweet, the three relate that they do know him well and due to being neighbors after all and know Gus and Wally’s morning routine: They wake up at 8, Wally brews the Coffee, Gus reads him the funnies, then they shower together while singing college fight songs, and then, with Jim saying this part so picture it in Brian Posehn’s voice please you won’t regret it, argue or have gay sex and then it’s off to work. It’s really sweet, both in showing off their well worn dynamic with each other, and the fact that the loftmates really DO know these two even if they dont’ know everything and they are close in their own way. Kevin can only give out a “Hm” in response... which is probably the closest he can get to saying touche without breaking into nerdy giggles.

Cue the good times montage as Wally introduces Kevin to Ingmar Bergman, who I have heard of even if i’ve never seen any of them, and some director I never heard of who made old timey comedies apparently. IT’s a really nice sequence. Kevin also shows 2001: A Space Oddesy to his friends, who are bored to tears by it while Kevin’s enraptured. Which I would say was another heavy-handed swipe at late 90′s cinema but being a teen myself who had mostly watched things like Star Wars, I did not gel with 2001 and need to rematch it at some point, so I totally relate to his friends utter boredom and confusion with it given it’s rep. It’s a visually stunning film. I will however stand by not liking Star Trek: The Motion Picture, as that film TRIES to be 2001 but is instead just really, REALLY boring.

But naturally things can be entirely good natured bonding between an elderly gay man and , as Wally puts it in the best line of the episode “The son god never wanted me to have”, as Kevin notices a film coming up that Wally apparently made, and looks to star gus. Wally panics and shoos his young protégé away... which yeah he could’ve just you know told him he doesn’t like the film or anything else and prevented this episode but then we wouldn’t of seen the gay equilvent of plan 9 from outer space so fair enough.

At the Gus’ Diner, the loftmates and their neighbors I mentioned earlier look over the poster, and we find out from Gus that that is him, and he starred in a movie.. and naturally Wally explained never showing it to his husband in the simplest way possible: By claming a shark ate it. You know while I watched the show I didn’t quite get it when I was younger and it’s probably why it took me decades to revisit it.. but I wish I had sooner this show is REALLY damn funny and i’m really looking forward to that spinoff with Wally and Gus.

Wally continues to dodge Kevin, so Kevin, trying to find info about the film and it being lost, goes to the video store.. back when those existed. Something I have to give the show is honestly the use of vhs, visits to video stores, and the movies Kevin mentions are the only things that really date this film. While swapping another Dustin Hoffman film in proved impossible, it is plausible Kevin would see it streaming somewhere. and it’s easy enough to swap Armageddon for Rise of Skywalker given that film’s just as good.. Last Jedi was excellent though. Point is this story REALLY holds up, which is the sign of a good story: where even if some elements are stamped to the time, the story itself could easily be told again with few changes. It’s also why i’m not AGAINST Reboots, as my coverage of ducktales makes obvious: As long as stories can still be told or you can retell a story in a unique and intresting way, it’s fine to reuse something. I do think hollywood overdoes it, but I’ve never thought there was genuine harm in it or reviving old franchises. It’s all in how you do it. But yeah while the local video store dosen’t help at all, Andy happens to know just the man for the job, though Jim and Posey nope out of going with them. Also something to note is the series animation: It’s animated like an old 30′s cartoon or a comic strip, modernized a bit in color and realisim, but still having comic strip stuff like shaking head lines, heat lines coming off coffee that sort of thing. I really love it.

Anyways the brothers head off to a funky out of the way video store, I wish there were more hole in the wall used media stores where I lived. We mostly have chains like Vintage Stock and Half-Priced Books, though I genuinely love both of those stores and VIntage Stock is the modern equilvent of places like blockbuster honestly. Anyway after Beardo confuses Kevin for an Employee kevin asks him about the man from pluto which Beardo reveals he knows about but is very rare and has few prints. I like Beardo.. he’s a neckbeard who seems more liable to complain abotu some reboot on the fact their rebooting it again rather than “gasp” women are involved. I prefer my neckbeards just a tad pretentious rather than you know, sexist, homophobic, deranged assholes with nothing better to do. I mean i’m still living at home and didn’t get out much before the pandemic either but you dont’ see me bitching every time a franchise gets a female lead.

Anyway, Kevin is inspired by that and with help from everyone gets the word out about the film. As you’d expect though this can’t end well, as Wally tries avoiding the premire entirely (And we get a great bit where Jim happens to see him trying to flee down the fire escape and Wally’s expression is priceless)

Huh.. I bet that’s what Rob Reiner when North had it’s premire. As you can probably guess the showing dosen’t go well: The film itself is a hilarious combination of the day the earth stood still (the general plot as we’ll find out more in a second) and Plan 9 From Outer Space (A cheestatic no budget film with a hulking man brute who can’t act as the lead), and in catching the feel of a b-movie it’s utterly perfectly done. This film would go perfect on MST3K and the audience’s howls of laughter agrees with me.

Wally however is utterly humiliated and doesn’t want to speak to Kevin which.. yeah is about the only issue I have with an otherwise marvelous episode. While I get Wally’s humiliation was Kevin’s fault.. Kevin GENUINELY meant well. While Kevin is book smart at his core he’s a dumb kid who didn’t know any better and didn’t realize Wally hated his film and it’s Wally’s own damn fault for not telling him. Sure Kevin should’ve picked up the hint, but given the kid is oblivious and didn’t even know what an x raiting is it’s clear he’s not the sharpest crayon in the box when it comes to life experince. Wally had every opportunity to just explain his story but didn’t. And I put most of the blame on Wally when he’s you know, the adult. He’s a 60 or so year old man. He should know better. But it really doesn’t take away from the episode entirely. But the loftmates clearly love the film and are quoting bits from it, with jim having a fishbowl on his head, when they run into Wally, though Wally is fine with them admitting it’s crap and he knows it is. We then get what REALLY makes the episode and really makes me primed for a spinoff: Wally and Gus’ backstory, which also makes it obvious the crew was probably going to use the two more had the series got another season.

Anyways it was the 50′s, Archie Andrews was an average teen and not shredded both in muscle and by a bear that one time, Fonzie was out and about and eyying, and Wally was a first unit director given a shot as the studio asked him for a script having utter faith in him. HIs script was a day the earth stood still esque parable on the Cold War.. until he met Gus who, naturally for Gus, was outrunning a ton of police having stumbled on set and likely defeated them all bare handed because Gus is as incredible as the hulk and likely also comes back through a glowing green door when he dies. So Wally made the tragic mistake of mixing his love life with his career, and lost both Kurt Douglas, who he bumped down from lead for Gus, and Charleton Hesston who just walked off and they got a dinkier stage and worse actors as a result. The resulting film ended Wally’s career but he was able to sell the rights to cinemas to make enough for them to start over in mission hill and buy the diner.. and at least they had each other. It’s a really great story that explains why it upsets Wally so much: This was his baby and while he dosen’t even for one second regret meeting gus or the life they’ve had, he regrets that his one film was a total trainwreck and goes off to the theater to mope as he plays his film for laughing crowds, as it was naturally held over. I mean when you get the next plan 9 from outer space, this was a bit before the room mind you, you hold onto that shit.

Kevin, who heard the whole thing, goes to mope by watching what is likely a MIcheal Bay film, who was a target even then folks. Oh you poor poor fools you knew not how much worse it could get... i.e. robot testicles. Just.. robot testicles. And their MAKING A DELUXE MOVIE DEVISTATOR. Why. Just.. why who wanted this after that scene. He’s sworn off good movies as he feels he no longer deserves them. Andy however bluntly tells him to cut the pity party, while he’s moping his friend really needs him and when you love somebody, you put your pants on for them. When you love somebody you see it to the end, when you love somebody the conclusions forgone when you love somebody you put your big boy pants right onnnnn! ... I’ll put the song at the end. Point is Kevin goes to help his friend, and as Wally is moping in the projection booth and wonders what he was thinking Kevin tells him the obvious truth: He was thinking of how far he’d go. “You taught me the best films are personal stories.. and this film is your valentine to Gus” While Wally starts to break a little, he does point out it doesn’t make it good.. but Kevin rightly counters that he’s not so sure of it. Wally sees the audience enjoying the film and goes down, with all of them carrying red light bulbs like the one gus has to show when he’s mad in the film. And Wally finally realizes waht I got to in the beginning: It doesn’t matter if a film’s good or bad, what matters is someone enjoys it. A film can be utterly terrible, and still be good. It can be a mess and still have merit. And Wally finally realizes it doesn’t matter if it’s the film he wanted, it’s the film he made for his future husband, it’s a film that brings laughter and sticks in people’s heads and really brings them a godo time. It’s a film worth remembering and Wally finally accepts that and his film as his own. Later that night Kevin and Wally exit the theater, with Wally no longer mad at him and the two still friends or as Wally puts it in the second best line of the episode “As close as an elderly gay man and a straight boy can be” Awwww. The two depart and we get a touching final scene as Wally comes home and finds a bottle of wine and a note from gus saying he has a suprise for him> Turns out Gus put on his old space helmet.. but fell asleep in it. So we get a really nice tender moment as Gus takes the helmet off, smooches his husband on his bald head and smiles brightly as the episode ends.

Final Thoughts on The Man From Pluto or I Married a Gay Man From Outer Space: Before you ask each episode had two titles for funzies, the first one to get past the censors and the second for fun and likely what they would’ve gone with if they could. As for this episode.. it’s spectacular. It holds up well even 20 years later, it’s touching, sweet and really damn funny and makes me want to rewatch the show as a whole again. I highly recommend seeking it out and hope mission hill is eventually made officially available somewhere. Till then you can find the whole series including this episode on YouTube and despite being the last one you could easily watch this one first if you want and it’s a decent enough intro to the show as a whole. I highly recommend it, an utter pleasure to watch. If you liked this review, you can comission your own by PMing me on this very blog, just mention you want to do a comission and we can talk it out. As this review proves, it dosen’t have to be a show i’ve done before or even one that’s remotely recent. Hell i’d gladly do Fonz and The Happy Days gang, the animated happy days spinoff that’s like dr. who but with the Fonz. Yes really. Whatever you want i’ll do it as long as it’s not porn for just 5 bucks an episode and 10 for a movie. YOu can also join my patreon, and for 2 dollars a month get acess to my discord (that i’ll start once I get patreons) and once I get enough patreons exclusive polls or 10 bucks for all of that and a review of your choice each month. You can find said patreon right here. And even 1 buck a month would be apricated if you can spare it and if not simply reblog this and share it around. You can also follow this blog for weekly ducktales, loud house and amphibia coverage as they come out. I’d also personally thank WeirdKev27 for both being a long time fan of this blog and for the comission.

Until we meet again say safe, wear a mask, check your atttic for Gary Busey and happy Halloween! Play us out Mr Heere!

youtube

#mission hill #reviews #plan 9 from mission hill #commission #bill oakley #john weinstein #lbgtq #adult swim #kevin french #Gus Duncz #Wally Langford #andy french #jim kubach #posey tyler #brian posehn #scott menville

17 notes · View notes

theravenouswriter514 · 3 years

Text

Day Twenty of the 30 Day Writing Challenge

I love today’s prompt! It’s, “Write about three of your celebrity crushes.”

As I’ve said time and time agian, I am a romantic. I fall for people and things fairly easily. This means, you guessed it, I have a number of celebrity crushes. My list somewhat scattered all over the place when it comes to the people on it, but I have a reason for loving each pf them. Laugh it up, because this one is gonna be corny.

First and foremost, this person will always be number one on my crush list. If you ever hear me say that I am no longer in love with this person, then please check on me and make sure I haven’t been kidnapped and forced to say it. My first celebrity crush is the deeply missed, late, great, Patrick Swayze. I have adored this man for longer than I can remeber. My mom and grandma were both huge fans of him while I was growing up. Every opportunity she got, my mom told me that “Dirty Dancing” was the greatest movie ever made. And I believed her. I still very much believe her. He is the ultimate image of masculinity and heart. So tough, yet never afraid to show vulnerability. From playing a kick-ass bouncer who ripped a man’s throat out in “Roadhouse,” to playing an equally badass drag queen in “To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything! Julie Nemar,” even playing an adrenaline junkie beach bum in “Point Break,” his acting range was incomparable. Not many people can play the tough guy who can dance and get away with it, but Swayze did it with grace. He brought the perfect balance of the tough, protecting man, and the soft, romantic lover into each character he played. I’m absolutely convinced he’s perfect. As a plus for me, he was a tough southern man, and being a tough southern woman myself, that makes him that much more attractive. I can remember when my mom found out that he had passed. I was a young girl, but I understood my mom’s heartbreak. When we lost Patrick, we lost a tried and true Hollywood legend.

Let me get on my soapbox just for a quick second. Another reason I love this man, is because he was never fond of the idea of sequels, especially ones out for quick money grabs. Which is why he turned down the opportunity to reprise his role in the, rightfully forgotten about, sequel to “Dirty Dancing.” That’s my opinion, take it or leave it. Patrick Swayze was, is, always will be my standard for men. That may be why I’m still single, but I’m okay with that. I’ll wait.

Second on the list is another legendary actor that we lost far too early. I only discovered this person fairly recently, as in, the past couple of years. I knew who he was before, but I didn’t pay him much attention. Then I was doing some research and discovered a lot of interesting things about him and about who he was. My second celebrity crush is River Phoenix. My crush on him really began as a young kid when, I first saw “Stand By Me” which remains to this day one of my favorite movies. I saw his character, Chris Chambers, and just wanted to bundle him up and save him. I can’t genuinely say I knew that I loved him until I saw the film “Running On Empty” in which River plays the eldest son of two fugitives. As corny as it sounds, I had a crush on him because his character was a music prodigy, and I have always had a thing for musicians. From there I watched more of his movies and paid him much more attention. His acting was kind of like looking at a painting. It always feels so mature and artful. He was never one to choose an acting role based on money or reputation either. He chose each of his roles based on whether or not he genuinely believed in the production.

But when you look into the unusual life that River Phoenix as a person led, then you’ll find that he was kind of out of this world. He had it pretty rough growing up, which I think also led to his tragic death. His parents were in a cult and they basically lived constantly on the road for a good portion of his childhood. Despite all that, he was the most empathetic and caring person toward every living thing on the planet. He wanted to change the world by bringing it peace. While all but impossible, that is a very noble and honorable goal for a young person to have. Most young people are dreamers who think they are going to change the world in a big way, including myself, and I really think that River was, and still is, the face of that dreamer stage in life. It’s a beautiful thing, and we should all hang onto our dreamer selves like he did until the end of our lives, even if we don’t end up going to extremes to actually change the world. A lot of the things he stood for were so innocent and hopeful, discovering him and how he lived his life put hope back into my own. Even though he passed before I was born, I still think that he embodies what each young generation reaches for, innocent and pure dreams.

The third person on this list is different and my crush on them is for much different reasons. It isn’t a physical attraction exactly, but rather just an overall attraction and romanticization of the person and the music they produce. My third celebrity crush is Billy Joel. Again, I attribute this one to my mother. She was and is a big Billy Joel fan, though she doesn’t find him as attractive as I seem to. I grew up listening to his songs, but the songs I was most drawn to are his romantic love songs. Imagine that, a romantic being drawn to love songs. There is something about his music and lyrics that just seem real. His lyrics tell such stories that they feel less like cheesy rom-coms and more like real couples. Which there is probably something to that, the lyrics are probably based heavily on real experiences. I can’t imagine writing songs like that without a little shred of truth to them. Lots of other love songs make love out to be always cheesy and fake, but Billy Joel writes it to where it feels true. And most modern love songs don’t do much for me. Talking about physical love or hook ups isn’t my idea of a love song. There again, that’s just me. When I hear Billy Joel sing that he loves a woman, I believe him. And I’m not saying that Joel never sings about sex, he most definitely does. But the way he goes about it is classy, and it doesn’t make me uncomfortable to listen to it with my own parents. So yes, I love Billy Joel. I have a crush on him and the idea of romance that his songs produce.

And there you have three of my celebrity crushes. I give you permission to laugh, because I am aware at how funny and cheesy I am. I embrace it. I like being a romantic. I like that I like what I like. I really enjoyed this one. I used to be embarassed to share the things and people I like. I used to be ashamed of my dorkiness, but now I enjoy it. I am who I am, weird and cheesy interests and all.

#writing #My writing #writer #amwriting #writing challenge #30 day writing challenge #reading #my thoughts #celebrity crushes #patrick swayze #river phoenix #billy joel

5 notes · View notes

gotatext · 5 years

Text

PREFERRED NAME — nora. i think i started going by it in like, 2009?? my full name is eleanor but i hated it n thought it was way too pretentious n i never felt like it fitted me so when i started writing on forums i decided i’d be a nora rather than eleanor and then my school friends called me it and it just kinda stuck, the only person who calls me eleanor is my mum

PRONOUNS — she / her / ethereal being beyond comprehension

AGE — 23 but i tell everyone im 21 because even tho time is literally fake im desperately clinging to that fleeting thing we call youth trying to catch it like smoke in my hands

PINTEREST — i actually have two. this one is my main one where i just cram all my shit n i’ve had it for years and some of its super unorganised. then i also have this one which is one i made for exclusively female characters. it started as mythological figures but now its like, women in literature and the occasional oc as well. variety is the spice of life!

DISCORD — lindsay lohan’s meth#8664

TUMBLR (PERSONAL/MUSE/RPH) — i used to be froseths but now im pvrscphones cos ya gal is a fucking whore for mythology

OTHER SOCIAL MEDIA YOU’D LIKE TO SHARE — oi oi guvna ere’s me twitta. also here’s my letterboxd n my goodreads if anyone still uses tht

MYER-BRIGGS — enfp / infp border .... the classic profile of a lit student

HP HOUSE — hufflepuff, am fuckin mad.

ZODIAC — libra which is a joke because i am in no way balanced but i guess i AM indecisive and a peacekeeper so?

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ASTROLOGY? — i believe it when it says good shits gonna happen in my life and blame it if bad shit happens but i don’t strongly follow it i just find it interesting

HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU STARTED RPING ON TUMBLR — maybe like 14?? my first rp blog here is literally so embarassing i wrote as clove from the hunger games n my best friend irl wrote cato :/ it was wild

WHAT YEAR WAS IT? — like 9 years ago?? 2010 maybs

NAME A RANDOM ROLEPLAY THAT STICKS OUT IN YOUR MEMORY — me n my friend ellie made this really cool group the summer before we left for uni which was loosely based on a concept mentioned mayb once in the divergent series, but it gave us loads of freedom to make it our own thing. it was called the fringe n it was like..... this dystopian society where people with different genes were cut off from the rest of society n lived in overrun slum cities where different groups had like, a monopoly over weapons, produce, etc.... my character jack was the leader of this lost-boy-esque tribe called the wolf pack who were hunters n used to run across the rooftops wearing the skins of animals they’d killed and engage in tribal rituals with sacrifices to the gods n shit. sounds lame but everyone there was so invested in their character arcs that it was a shame to see it go. but ! it kind of reached its end point so we blew it up w nukes n they all died. tragic.

WHAT WEIRD ANIMAL WOULD YOU HAVE AS A PET IF IT WAS REALISTIC — a fox?? do ppl keep foxes? idk i’ve always just felt a sense of connection w them like when a fox stares at me im like this shit is life i am living and breathing in this bitch.... visceral

NAME THE FIRST SONG ON YOUR DISCOVER WEEKLY ON SPOTIFY OR THE FIRST SONG THAT COMES ON APPLE MUSIC / ITUNES SHUFFLE — everbody party tonight by cobra man n summer girl by haim..... not my usual stuff but big summer chillin vibes,.....

NAME A BOOK THAT YOU READ IN SCHOOL THAT YOU SURPRISINGLY LIKED — lord of the flies and also the handmaid’s tale. one of assignments was to write a chapter from another character’s perspective n i chose moira

NAME A BOOK YOU HATED THAT MOST PEOPLE LIKED — skellig. fuck off with ur asprin ugly bat man i don’t care. also of mice and men. don’t care about the rabbits or curley’s goddamn wife.

WHAT TV SHOW DID YOU RECENTLY BINGE? — im not a big binger bc i find it jst makes me depressed if i watch tv all day but im nearly finished stranger things season 3 n i recently finished euphoria (big rec but proceed w caution as quite triggering content)

FAVOURITE QUOTE — cool girl speech from gone girl. but also “there’s something dangerous about the boredom of teenage girls” i know its like.... such an overused quote but it really encapsulates this kind of feral girlhood that a few of my characters like bridget n greta have tapped into. i also loved the line “i feel like i could eat the world raw” from song of achilles, that really captures this kind of.... pure n childlike enthusiasm tht i wanna achieve w rory

LINK TO A VINE THAT EXUDES YOUR ‘ENERGY’ — this is my energy completely am always covered in glitter n staring broodily out of the windows of ubers at 4am like im in the sad bit of an indie film

DO YOU WRITE OUTSIDE OF RP? WHAT DO YOU WRITE? — uhh.... not as much as i shd.... i want to be a writer so i shd be makin some effort to get my stuff Out Into The World but im just not.... lol. ive done a lot of poetry collections . i wnt to finish a novel @ some point too.

THREE YOUTUBERS YOU STILL TRUST — bold of you to assume i trust any youtubers

A CELEBRITY CRUSH THAT JUST WON’T QUIT — id literally die for saoirse ronan n timothee chalamet :/ chance perdomo also owns my ass.

EVER MEET A CELEBRITY? SHARE YOUR STORY — i once high-fived dani harmer, the actress who played tracy beaker. today my sister text me tryin to make me guess what celebrity she just saw on holiday in wales and for ages she let me think it was timmothee but it was actually bradley walsh from the chase :/

WHAT’S YOUR PICTURE-PERFECT NIGHT? — i am in a bomb ass crop top and mini skirt, several scrunchies in my hair, glitter all over my face, wearing cowboy boots. we eat dinner in a trendy but affordable pub that doubles up as a cocktail bar n then we drink zombies or sex on the beaches n go to a rave where everyone is on the same wavelength n i share drugs with girls in the toilets and we swap numbers knowing we will never text each other but its ok bc in that moment we feel like we are soulmates and everyone is super drunk n touching everyone else n its all very visceral and we walk through the woods when the rave ends and lie in the grass because we wish to suck out all the marrow of life

A CONSPIRACY THEORY YOU KINDA BELIEVE IN — princess diana was murdered

ARE ALIENS REAL? — maybe the real aliens are the friends we made along the way

PLAY ANY PHONE GAMES? WHICH ONES? — love island game im addicted and way too invested in my fictional relationship with bobby, a cartoon

WHAT’S A FILM YOU LOVED WHEN YOU WERE YOUNG AND RECENTLY WATCHED, ONLY TO FIND OUT YOU DON’T ANYMORE — bold of u to assume i remember my childhood. but if we’re talking last 10 years angust, thongs n perfect snogging is so so cringe

DO YOU COLLECT ANYTHING? — pairs of glasses belonging to other ppl when they break / get new ones even though i can see perfectly well.

WHAT’S SOMETHING YOU WANT TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BUT YOU’RE TOO LAZY? — mythology...... always a craving and a wish i’d read like ancient texts but my school wasn’t good enough to do greek or latin or any of that shit n even tho i could read english translations i cant be bothered. also criminal psychology

THREE LANGUAGES YOU DON’T SPEAK, BUT WISH YOU COULD — italian, french and latin

MOVIE YOU’VE WATCHED MORE THAN 5 TIMES — ladybird, about time, angus thongs, shrek 2, what we do in the shadows, the history boys, atonement, coraline, the breakfast club, ferris bueller’s day off

NAME A FICTIONAL CHARACTER FROM TV/FILM/MOVIE/GAME/BOOK THAT YOU FIND YOURSELF PROJECTING ON / YOU RELATE TO — cecilia lisbon. rue in euphoria. alison brie in glow. adam parrish in the raven cycle. richard papen. olivia cooke’s character in thoroughbreds. allen ginsberg in kill your darlings. lily in sex education. holliday grainger’s character in the film animals --- i too am an aspiring writer who never writes and just gets drunk instead .

DO YOU FOLLOW ANY SPORTS? WHO DO YOU ROOT FOR? — no. cba

HOBBIES BESIDES WASTING AWAY HERE? — i go to the movies basically every day bcos i work in a cinema. im also a voracious reader n i occasionally do theatre or costume making

PLUG A TV SHOW / MOVIE / BOOK / VIDEO GAME / ETC… YOU WISH MORE PEOPLE WOULD CHECK OUT — where the wild things are (film by spike jonze). animals. beats. the book fen by daisy johnson and a girl is a half formed thing by eimar mcbride. andy warhol’s biography from a to b and back again

WHOSE BRAIN WOULD YOU LIKE TO PICK, ALIVE OR DEAD? — phoebe waller-bridge on how i get her life. carey mulligan on how she got to be such a good actress n how i can become her. maybs wes anderson. maybs gillian flynn. i tend to listen to podcasts w the ppl i really wanna pick the brains of.

TEAM EDWARD OR JACOB? — edward :/

LAST MOVIE SEEN IN THEATRE — blinded by the light n i lovd it

DO YOU STILL READ? — when i finished uni i kinda got out of the habit but this week i finished two books so ive set myself the challenge of a book a week.

IF SO, WHAT ARE YOU CURRENTLY READING? — i finished song of achilles yesterday n i also finished call me by your name yesterday. started circe by madeline miller today, im also partway through milkman by anna burns and the plays of annie barker

ON A SCALE OF 1-10, HOW MUCH DID YOU HATE FILLING THIS OUT? – 3 i didnt hate it bcos at heart i am self-indulgent and love fashioning some sense of self when i feel lost in a world that is scary and constantly changing

#wshedtask002

8 notes · View notes

deliciousscaloppine · 4 years

Text

The Blood is the Life

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Vampire AU. NieYao and SangYao- everyone is of age. Post sunshot campaign characterizations. Nie Mingjue is captured by the vampire coven of Qishan and turned into a vampire. Meng Yao is his mortal lover, a witch’s son and a witch himself who covets his vampire gift of immortality and Huaisang is the empath prince who observes their relationship, and vies for recognition and affection. Huaisang puts Meng Yao in jail and dreams of burning him because he won’t tell him where Mingjue is. Lan Xichen makes a thirsty appearance.

Meng Yao smiles. “The Clan leader is too kind to someone like me.”

“Ah! Meng Yao, that's nonsense. Please drink.”

Meng Yao lifts the medicine to his mouth. Compared to yesterday he looks rosy and vibrant. Is this the power of the witch?

“So what happened to my brother? What was this creature inside the hall? And how did you survive? I lost my mind when I saw how much blood you lost.”

Meng Yao touches faintly his throat, where he was bitten. The physician has bandaged him well, not even a little blood seeps through. Huaisang would like to pluck those bandages away and really look. The dungeon has been on his mind lately. If he secludes Meng Yao there he'll definitely pry answers from him. But it will be quite the effort to place him there and still preserve his meek veneer, which honestly is his most potent charm.

“I know law compels me to answer your questions, Clan Leader, but for now there is a limit to what I can say. There was indeed a creature in the hall, a blood-drinker that had come from the Wen. But as you well know such a creature wouldn't have gone far into our territory with the protective enchantments in place. As to how I survived I used means that are unsavoury to seal its powers. I could be easily condemned for such practices and if even if you forgave me for telling you, others would condemn you for being too lenient.”

“So you are truly a witch, Meng Yao!”

Meng Yao smiles again with some fear that he will be assailed.

“It's not that I wanted to be one. Put yourself in my place. Even if I wanted to, I could not change what I was born into.”

“Is this how you survived then? By means of some other magic?”

“It's easy to staunch a bleeding if one knows where he bleeds from.” Meng Yao says enigmatically.

That's why all these creatures are wretched, Huaisang thinks. Always keeping their silences, protecting their meaningless secrets.

“Meng Yao is precious to me” he says. “He is my brother's favorite. If my brother can't return to me, I would not part with Meng Yao, the only thing he left behind.”

Meng Yao stares at him silently cautiously as if he knows he is being lured into something.

“If Nie Mingjue cannot come back” he says “Meng Yao wouldn't want to stay. I would that I followed him wherever he was.”

Huaisang knows this line upsets him, even though he can't know why. Is it because the thought of such a relation excites him, or because Meng Yao looks so handsome. If his brother truly was kissing and embracing him all along, how lucky he was.

“So he is not dead.” Huaisang says and feels a little peace at that.

“That depends on the young master's definition of death.” Meng Yao forcefully says. Oh he thinks he is being clever.

Huaisang puts down the medicine and opens his fan. It's so hot inside. The physician certainly showed some consideration for poor and delicate Meng Yao who almost bled to death.

“Meng Yao, you know that people speak ill of you.” he cautiously says, as if he regrets it too. “I wouldn't want to be pressured into letting you go after you have shown my brother such devotion and loyalty.”

Meng Yao's eyes betray no fear at these words. In fact he seems a little pleased at how this goes. A faint smile plays at the edges of his lips. He has known cruelty before, this one. Huaisang tries not to look directly at him, because he thinks the way he is now, his mouth looks perfectly kissable.

“Your answers definitely do not satisfy the ears of the court, but I want to protect you. Will you let me protect you, Meng Yao?” he asks.

Meng Yao smiles wide. “If Nie Huaisang accepts my protection, then I accept his.”

“What do you mean by that? Are you referring to the night you subdued this creature? By the way, where is it now, would it be possible for me to see it, or was it perhaps disposed?”

“This creature is possibly where lord Huaisang wants to place me. Somewhere lonely and dark. But I wouldn't advise him to go there during the day. These creatures are quite volatile when they feel threatened.”

He bites his lips, raising his fan to hide his face. It's so difficult confronting someone who is stronger than you. He hates this, hiding behind some painted paper as if it's a barrier that could truly protect him. He folds the fan again and squeezes it between his hands. He is the lord here, Meng Yao is nothing but vermin not fit even for reincarnation.

“Why can't you be honest with me?” he asks softly. “The creature was my brother. You secluded him somewhere and now you are afraid you will be punished for it.”

“Is there any need for honesty when Nie Huaisang knows my mind?” Meng Yao asks.

Before this moment Huaisang hadn't realized that he had permanently lost his brother. He should strike Meng Yao for this. If anything he would have wanted to say goodbye.

“I may not be someone you fear, but do you really have a need to insult me, Meng Yao? I asked for an honest answer and you have mocked me. I start to think my brother didn't show you enough kindness for you to treat me like this.”

He produces the letter his brother wrote, pronouncing him king.

“He was still alive when he wrote this” he says. “All I ask is that I know he lives still.”

“Qinghe is very narrow with its definitions of living. I for instance do not live, even though I breathe and speak to you.”

“Then it's the same with my brother. He is some other thing now. He drinks the blood of men. He would drink mine too and anyone living and only Meng Yao can subdue him. Someone like you can't understand my grief, if anything it must make you happy that you now share the same twisted life with my noble brother. But even though I find you despicable I will allow you to live, if you take me to him and let me put an end to his suffering.”

Meng Yao balks, his eyes flaring with mad light.

“You would willingly put an end to his life?” he barks and then smiles. “Then maybe I should have not subdued him at all. I should have let him run riot and slaughter you all.”

“But such a thing will surely come to pass if you continue to control him. Meng Yao, now you see I really have to make you my prisoner. You have to gather your things now, because you will be surely moved to the dungeons.” he says with sufficient sorrow.

He truly feels no pleasure in taunting him, only anguish. But he is the lord here and he wants to show his strength.

Meng Yao's face is angry. So very angry, but he does not protest. Huaisang will have to think of some clever torture if he is to wring the location of his brother from him. Perhaps find that snake skin and burn it before his eyes.

….

Lan Xichen Zewu Jun is a renowned cultivator, he does not leave his mountain easily for one thing or the other. But he was his brother's personal friend and his disappearance brings him out of his misty retreat. Huaisang thought would have to beg and beg for a meeting, but all he has to do is send to him the mysterious snake skin and mention that vampires have made their appearance in Qinghe.

When he arrives his eyes betray a sort of guilty concern. “Where is Nie Mingjue?” he asks. “He left Gusu some time ago, it's not possible that he has not arrived.”

“I am afraid there was some personal betrayal” Huaisang mutters with sorrow in his eyes. “His attendant is involved but he won't tell us anything. Only you could wring the truth from this spiteful creature.”

“Creature?” Zewu Jun asks with fear in his eyes.

Huaisang opens his fan to hide his lips as if the words alone would embarass him. “A witch and a witch's son.” he whispers in confidence. “His life was indebted to my brother, but he did not meet this grace with kindness. He has done something to my brother, Zewu Jun, and only you can tell us what.”

Xichen follows him uneasily to the dungeon, the one under the surface of the earth. He fears he will see atrocities here, but Huaisang is not some depraved lord. He has let Meng Yao live with dignity. He has most of his things, and the handsome clothes Nie Mingjue bought for him. He is given meals and wine and no one harasses him. Huaisang has been nothing but magnanimous.

If Meng Yao really possessed the form of a snake, he would have rather crushed its head with his foot. But as long as his form is human and pleasing, one might as well show him a little grace.

As they descend the stairs, a guard holding a lantern before them, Huaisang can already see their prisoner, sitting silently with a crooked smile at the center of his room. He wears a strange white silken robe loosely about his shoulders that brings to mind the movement of a snake. Did his brother really buy such an item for him? Did he enjoy the strange tales told enough to entertain himself with such gifts?

As Zewu Jun approaches the final step in view of the cell, Meng Yao suddenly moves, raising his arms to cover his face. Some tension seems to have taken hold of him and Huaisang immediately wants to know why. Zewu Jun observes this creature from afar with some faint worry, almost as if he recognizes it.

As the guards let them in his cell, opening the heavy barred doors for them, Huaisang sees how Meng Yao struggles to breathe, averting his face even as he hides it behind his long sleeves.

“Zewu Jun is here to see you, A-Yao. Won't you show him your face?” Huaisang says and fans himself slowly. “He is such an asocial creature, except from my brother he has no affection for anyone else.”

Setting down Shoyue and Liebing with a terse air, Zewu Jun sits before this prisoner. Huaisang can't help but hide his face as well, his feelings are running rampant. He would be lying if he said he didn't envy. This man really thinks that he will offer some meaningful resolution to them. Huaisang wishes he could tell him he is just here just to produce a reaction. He is nothing but a soft pink canary to him.

“You can shows us your face. I won't be disturbed if you are disfigured.” Zewu Jun says compassionately.

“Disfigured! Meng Yao is a beauty. That's why he is so difficult. He can't bear any judgements. He thinks he is above us all. Zewu Jun, tell him that you are here for his own good. Everyone is certain he has done something to my brother. With his background how could I not put him in jail?”

Zewu Jun does not deign his antics with a reply, instead he reaches the prisoner, clasping his hands, as if he hopes to make him reveal his face. But Meng Yao's arms shake with resistance.

“Guards, let Zewu Jun see his face.” he says snapping his fan.

It's curious to have such men at his disposal and to be able to motivate them to cruelty with just a few words. Two of them walk into the cell with perfect posture, losing to time to follow his command. Reaching their prisoner, they wrench his arms violently to reveal his face. There is nowhere for Meng Yao to hide now.

He struggles once, trying to flee, but guards hold on to him with bruising force. Zewu Jun looks distraught, but not at the violence performed before him. Even Huaisang feels a little uneasy at that, but that's maybe because he is the perpetrator, he knows how much this must hurt. To be seen despite your wishes.

And he can't help but rasp with a hint of longing when he sees Meng Yao struggle like that. Finally a reaction he caused, a reaction for him.

“Lianfang!” Zewu Jun says with similar longing and Meng Yao cries as if burned. His eyes then become fierce and with a gesture Huaisang doesn't understand he phases through the grasp of his guards and darts through the walls as if he were some immaterial ghost.

Huaisang hasn't felt that kind of excitement in years, if he ever did in his life. A witch. A real witch, who can do extraordinary things. A bird that won't get caught. Everyone flutters about almost shrieking like the birds in his fallen cages, except for him and Zewu Jun. Slanting his eyes, he has seen this expression before, an expression of solemn yearning, only he doesn't know where it was that he saw it before. Was it his brother? Or was it himself in the mirror of his mind.

Whens spirits have calmed, and the fortress has been searched throughly to reveal that Meng Yao is really gone, he finally seats the awestruck Lan Xichen in a pleasant room to have some tea with him.

“You called the creature Lianfang?” he says and his fingers touch the flayed, dried snake skin Xichen has just returned to him. He wonders if he put it in a little brazier among hot coals would Meng Yao shriek and cry in anguish. Would his skin burn and blister like he imagines it to?

Xichen raises his head. “He is not a creature” he says. “He is important to me. Please try not to hurt him if you apprehend him.”

“But Zewu Jun, you saw what he did! He lied to us all along. Pretending to be my brother's soothsayer and advisor, living like a common man, contaminating us all with his essence. If he is not a supernatural demon of some sort, what is he?”

“It's hard to explain and it is even harder to imagine that he caused you real harm. When we saw him in the dungeon he could have hurt us both. He could have injured the guards. But he didn't do any of these things. Are those not enough reasons to assume his innocence.”

“Innocence? Let's not rush to such conclusions, Zewu Jun” Huaisang says placatingly. “I do not know this person as you do. Perhaps if you told me more, I would be better equipped to deal with him, maybe even find my brother.”

Zewu Jun hangs his head at this. “Mingjue never told me he found him. I do not understand why.”

“So this creature is something he took from you?” Huaisang probes. Wouldn't it be the most interesting thing if this Meng Yao seduced powerful men to live in their elegant courts? Maybe this explains Huaisang's uneasy attraction to him after all. A thing akin to a glamour. A cheap trick, easily countered.

“Lianfang left Cloud Recesses for unknown reasons” Xichen whispers as if the memory pains him. “I thought he was happy there. For many nights I searched for him, but my Clan started to look upon it with disdain. I had to stop. I asked lord Mingjue to find him for me.”

“Meng Yao has lived with us for several years. From his reaction it's true that he might be your Lianfang too. But then why wouldn't brother tell you? What exactly does he do? Does he bewitch men?” he asks innocently.

Zewu Jun's eyes shoot up with a cold glare that makes Huaisang shiver. He certainly wouldn't want to antagonize such a man. Lucky Meng Yao to have enthralled not one, but two noble men. Huaisang won't be so easy to swoon for him.

“Ah, regardless, we should search for him. He is after all related to my brother's disappearance. And only a few nights ago, a vampire attacked the castle. Meng Yao is the one who subdued him. He is also our only witness to that and his half-words were disconcerting. This is so distressing.” he whines. “Zewu Jun, if possible please guide me. I can't be really expected to deal with this mess. I have no experience at all.” he says and fans himself furiously, as if the very prospect of mental labor makes him hot.

But on his mind is Meng Yao’s cage. The one he left his ruffled feathers drop. His trove of ritual objects. Maybe he ought to take a look.

#the untamed #the untamed fic #nie huaisang #meng yao #nie mingjue #the untamed vampire au #the blood is the life #lan xichen #nieyao #sangyao #a bit of #xiyao

1 note · View note

tellywoodtrash · 5 years

Text

kwk lb: saif/sara ali khan

ugh these damn intros. i liked the varun/katrina ep better, where they brought karan out instead of this time waste of a meaningless ramble karan does in every damn ep.

yash johar sounds like a sweet dad tho.

….. all this talk of “royalty” and saif comes out looking like a right hobo.

gosh howwww does she look SO much like amrita? like, they cloned these damn kids, didn’t they? like straight up just CLONED them.

sara sounds like a smart kid.

lmao her little snort chuckles as saif tries to be diplomatic.

saif sounds like an exhausting man-child to deal with.

god this modern family question. pls we all already know that everyone is cool with it. why ainvayi trying to stir up drama?

“kareena aunty” lmao bitch just try

lol saif just staring into the distance as his child speaks with more maturity than he ever had at that age (or now.)

sara seems to have the same existential angst that i do.

lmaoooooooooooooo saif is just noping outta this soooo hard.

all these years and she’s never been shopping with kareena?

lolololol ofc kareena hated the museum.

ugh lord can we stop talking about their family situationnnnnnnnnnn. like either give us some juicy gossip about it or stop talking about this happy happy family narrative. honestly.

lmao “happy independence day” i love her i truly do

sara’s lol whut face at that ainvayi ka google home nonsense.

don’t lie sara you still have a boyfriend.

also what just one boyfriend long back? you have one right now (that AD of kedarnath) i can name two exes (harshvardhan, that politician’s grandson.) girl, this is the age of the internet; idk why ppl try and hide these things and make a fool of themselves.

yup; karan’s talking about that politician’s grandson, whose brother janhvi was/is/whatever-the-current-status-is dating.

sara is soooooo done with these two embarassing uncles.

*muttering* “not all of the values” omfg the sass

pft karan trying to make saif’s mostly fail “journey” look good

i’m just transfixedddddddd by how old the styling is making saif look. like why can you ppl just embrace the age you’re at, instead of trying soooooooo hard and ending up looking worse.

yeah how can someone who’s descended from royalty and has literally every single form of privilege in life feel bad about chote-mote failures here and there? you’d have to be a damn fool to.

lmao saif processing everything sara is saying.

“gym look is a visual delight” god karan you’re such a gross creeper honestly can you just fucken let women live and go to the gym jfc

i am sara, sara is me

what journey? ek movie na kiya hue hi she got a second in hand, what big struggle are these ppl talking about??????/

OMFG THIS TAIMUR NONSENSE. it really gets my goat how this whole fucking situation has gotten so fucking outta hand. in every single way all of this is fucking messed up. leave the poor baby alone.

oh. viral bhayani is much younger than i thought he was. i thought he was an old uncle.

lmaooooooooooo viral talking about cherishing the memory as if he’s one of taimur’s parents? saif’s face also reflecting the same; like bhai tu hai kaun??????

saif honestly looks confused and mad and like…. same.

KARAN SO HELP ME GOD LEAVE YOUR DAMN KIDS ALONE UGH SDLKFJSLKJFLSDK

i am sara, objecting to this “rate” garbage.

she looks sooooooo unconvinced and mad and like she has something to say but she’s holding her tongue.

lol mirma.

i hateeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee karan and his body shaming bullshit. i really hate him.

ok fwding this coz i can’t tolerate such second-hand embarrassing nonsense.

can saif and karan literally just diaf for shaming her like this, thanx.

ugh saif is just sucha weirdo creep bringing up chubby chasers jfc i hate men so much.

finally time for rapid fire. pls god let sara win.

that ok google always sounds so doneeeee with karan every time he addresses “her”. even AI women are sick of his shit.

all of bollywood’s tharki buddhas are enamoured with alia these days huh?

oh ho, guessing saif doesn’t want a sanghi jamaai. aur drugs aur infidelity ki baatein aap na hi karo toh best hai.

“got cash? take her.” wonderful. not creepy at all.

gtfo with your intellectual elitism saif. OOTD naa jaankar tumhe kaunsa booker prize milna hai?

LMAOOOOOOO IT’S 2018 AND PPL ARE STILL SHITTING ON VIVEK OBEROI THE POOR THING

looks like all those rumours of saifeena being broke af are true afterall, with the amount saif is showing laalach for paisa.

ofc he’d rather be caught. majaal hai jo you get hurt but still keep your conscience clean. fuck.

sara is me. just incredulous at that answer.

all these ppl calling ranbir kapoor a charmer….. i just…… like have some standards man. ugh.

lmao what great work with imtiaz ali?????? love aaj kal was terrible. only the bits in the past were slightly tolerable. ainvayi, just coz he might be doing imtiaz’s next. also aren’t sara/karthik doing something with imtiaz too? is that the same thing?

MAN YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT? AN AKSHAY/SAIF MOVIE AGAIN. LIKE THEY PAIRED OFF SO WELL IN THE 90S AND I WANT SOME MORE BROTP SHIT FROM THEM. (not crap like tashan tho.)

note to self - watch main khiladi tu anari again.

kareena’s gonna kill him for not saying she was the hottest.

go sara go. win this shit!

poor sara and her traumatic childhood thanks to her parents’ awful movies.

really? varun dhawan? over everyone else?

i mean i guessss….. he’s got a near-100% success rate. but there’s so many better ACTORS.

“DON’T SAY THAT ABBA!!!!!!!!!!!!!” lmao she’s superstitious i think. after all the hassle she went through.

man is everyone chaaatofying alia’s coz this is karan’s show or what? anushka is way more look-up worthy than her. she’s from a non film background, she acts well, does a good balance of movies and produces interesting stuff. like….. honestly.

WHY DO ALL THESE GIRLS WANNA MARRY RANBIR’S DUMB ASSS I REALLY DON’T GET IT LIKE HAVE SOME STANDARDS. HAVE ANY STANDARDS.

lol i like her tinder bios.

pft kartik aryan is such a chooza. sara pls, you seem smart and sorted, aim higher pls. at least for like vicky kaushal and all.

SAIF IS ACTING LIKE A RIGHT DALAL WITH THIS MONEY GARBAGE. HE NEEDS TO STOP.

oh boy what is on your phone girl.

ranveer ranveer blah blah blah……

sara deserved to win.

ouff this game is boring yaaaar.

LMAO SALIM? WHO SALIM?

sara lost quicker than i thought she would on the ivy league Q.

how does kunal come under pataudi family? kuch bhi.

lmao oh sara. manikarnika is the jhansi ki rani.

LMAO SALIM IS BITTOO

SAIF AND SOHA????????? ARJUN JANHVI??????? SHAHID ISHAAN???????? SALMAN AND HIS BROTHERS? COME TF ONNNNNNNN SARAAAAA.

lolllllllllllllllll sara is so petty in her victory i love her.

why do they always keep the cup at that one spot???

why does arjun kapoor look sunburnt? like its that unnatural brown-pink colour that srk was for a lot of years.

#koffee with karan #kwk lbs #episode liveblogs

16 notes · View notes

kaibutsushidousha · 6 years

Text

DanganRonpa Re:Birth Summary - Chapter 1, part 3

First half of the trial. Sorry for being late, English V3 made me forget I was doing this. Anyways, I’m pretty sure I know who the culprit is and how they did it.

Trial video and script

This trial’s murder trick is completely credited to Nao Shigure (Mitsunari Koga’s voice actor)

Like always, the trial starts with the same explanation we’ve already seen dozens of time. Re:Birth has the V3 rule that you join the execution if you don’t vote for anyone. As all first trials, it begins with everyone not where to start and someone (Todoroki) asking if the game’s Mono is the culprit.

After some derailing flavor text (highlight being Izumo being afraid of death until she realizes that means she will join the chidren), but Yodogawa takes the lead saying they should describe the murder from the start, checking for different interpretations. Although Aisaka would rather skip the more obvious point, Yodogawa insists it’s important to go through everything, so they start from the basic of the basic, the cause of death.

Nonstop debate 1: Mizuta claims the culprit strangled Rokudou with their hands. It turns out she didn’t read the Monodora File, which makes me really believe she was looking her lost contacts during the investigation. No solid indication of that so far though.

Next question is where did the culprit find the rope used as the murder weapon. Option selectin: 1) the warehouse 2) their own room 3) the gym Everyone agrees it was the rope from Monodora’s weapon set. Itsuki searched the school for possible other ropes, but didn’t find anything. People impressed by her physical abilities, as no one expected her to be able to run the whole big school in so little time.

With cause and weapon out of the way, next comes the scene of the crime. It’s the boys’ locker room, so Yodogawa asks Samejima, Koga and Todoroki to discuss, since the 3 of them we’re keeping guard there.

Mitsunari Koga (Horse): Fuck yeah-! You guys should be grateful for the priviledge of listening to me!

Mitsunari Koga (Deer): Horse-kun, whyyy do you always have to act so high-and-mighty?

Mitsunari Koga (Horse): Shut-! The ones are stand high on top are always us mighty carnivores-!!

Narumi Oosone: Pretty sure horses are meat more often than meat-eaters.

Nonstop Debate 2: Samejima claims nothing suspicious was found in the room, but there was the letter addressed to him in the trash can.

Naturally, all accusation fly towards Samejima, but he claims he slept all night long and didn’t go to the locker room as the letter said. It naturally doesn’t stick, as the letter was found in the locker room’s trash. Aisaka is quick to affirm the letter is not enough to suspect Samejima as it could have easily been planted by the culprit to incriminate him. I gotta say I like how Aisaka and Samejima have been handled so far. They were always acting together and coordinated throughout the chapter and Aisaka clearly shows an unwavering trust in him during the trial, but none of this is ever brought into evidence by story, it’s just there for the reader to notice on their own. DanganRonpa “main” pairings are usually much less subtle than that.

Anyways, as Tsuchiya is asleep during the day and wake during the night, Himuro asks if he heard Samejima leaving the room late at night, but Tsuchiya can’t tell due to the room’s soundproofing. Aisaka tells everyone to think of another possibility, as they have no real evidence against Samejima, but Izumo suddenly reveals she saw Samejima during her walk.

Nonstop Debate 3: Samejima says that even if Izumo saw him going to the gym, there’s no proof he went to the locker room. Fujimori offers the broken locker as proof.

Samejima tries to argue anyone could have busted the locker open, but Fujimori replies he is the only one strong enough to open the jammed locker because he is the Option selection: 1) SHSL Karate Fighter 2) SHSL Aikido Fighter 3) SHSL Martial Artist Kagura points out how Samejima is indeed the only one by commenting on how all the other men in the cast are scrawny and weak-looking. Samejima is cornered and Fujimori convinces him to tell everything by repeating Yodogawa’s “If you move towards the truth, the truth will move towards you, too” speech. Samejima finally admits he read the letter and went to the locker room.

When nighttime was announced, Samejima took a bath. Leaving from the bath, he found the letter slipped through his door. He read, assumed it was from Monodora and did as told. Reaching the locker, no one was there, which means Samejima got there before the murder happened. Without knowing what to do, he opened all the lockers.

We don’t know exactly how important the motive video was to Samejima, but we at least know it’s something he doesn’t want anyone to see. If it exists, he has to retrieve and hide it. The group pressures Samejima into revealing what was in his video. It was a video of critics evaluating his performance. That’s apparently embarassing enough to kill him.

Anyways, he had to retrieve his video no matter what and forced the locker open for it. Realizing he was tricked and there was nothing there, he got pissed and threw the letter in the trash.

Naturally, not everyone immediately believes Samejima’s excuse. Koga proposes Rokudou was there and found the motive video first, leading to Samejima killing him and trying to hide the body in the locker. Izumo and her “children” agree. Himuro calls him out for not telling everything from the start. He answers that everyone would call him the culprit if he said he was at the crime scene and he didn’t want anyone to know about the video.

The side that doesn’t trust Samejima is pushing to vote already while the side that trusting insists it’s still too early for that (actually just Aisaka, the rest of the Samejima trusters are not talking for some reason). Then Fujimori performs the most random and obtuse Hangman’s Gambit I’ve ever seen, which makes me glad Re:Birth is not a real game.

Hangman’s Gambit 1: School Regulations. The gameplay seemed quite easy, but this answer came completely out of left field in the conversation.

Fujimori tells everyone not to vote yet. The school regulations part is actually about the Class Trial rules (killer gets executed) and it’s used a very obtuse way to say “I don’t think Samejima-kun would be dumb enough to leave such an obvious clue on the scene with his life at stake”.

Option selection: 1) Letter from the mastermind? 2) Boys’ Locker Room’s Small Window 3) Locker that doesn’t fit the frame

I’m actually surprised no real DanganRonpa ever pulled the “the culprit couldn’t be that dumb” argument before. Anyways, Samejima is half-cleared of suspicion, so what now? The group decides all men are suspects now, as only them could enter the locker room. The guys start saying “not me” in sequence. They decide to just continue the discussion as normal, paying attention to the boys.

Nonstop Debate 4: They talk about the boys’ habits for a while. By the way, Mizuta’s nicknames for Yodogawa, Samejima, Koga and Fujimori are Secchan, Omi-chan, Mittsun and Ayumun. This debate actually wins itself automatically if you do nothing, because the one shooting the bullet is actually Maiko, not Fujimori.

Maiko refutes the claim that there are only 5 suspects by revealing Fujimori’s gender to everyone. She pulled this card way earlier than I expected. She tells the situation and he confirms. They also confirm that Monodora knew Fujimori was a boy all along.

Monodora: Besides, c’mon, there’re people with also of fetishes everywhere... y’know.

Ayumu Fujimori: You really say that knowing it’s not it...

Kazuomi Samejima: You... were into crossdressing?

Misuzu Aisaka: S-stop. As said by Monodora, people’s interents are... individual and multifarious... ...Fujimori-san! We, will not judge-!

Aisaka is a great well-meaning girl, but I think she needs a more convincing “I am not kinkshaming face”.

Fujimori try to say it’s not his own fetish, but Monodora interrupts him with the uniform change scene. He is wearing his male uniform now.

Back to the trial discussion, Fujimori is now not only a suspect, but the most suspect suspect, as he was hiding the truth. Samejima is the first to believe him, since he was the one who saved him from suspicion before. Aisaka, as usual, takes Samejima’s side. The discussion will not continue with Fujimori added to the suspect list. Then we suddenly get Izumo’s Rebuttal Showdown objection line, except with no Rebuttal Showdon.

Kasumi Izumo: You’re cursed!

Izumo raises the very convincing point that Fujimori’s is the one who gets the most advantage out of the murder scene choice, with his gender hidden and all. Fujimori can’t produce a more decent counter-argument than “I would never kill Saiji-kun”, so his tries to calm down and think. Yodogawa is faster and does the objection thing Izumo just did.

Seishi Yodogawa: Your reasoning is really third-rate.

Yodogawa counter-argues that Fujimori already explained why he was hiding his gender and taking that aside, she has nothing else to tie the case to him. Samejima and Aisaka add how Fujimori has been super helpful to solving the case. Koga tries saying this could be an act to earn trust, but Aisawa calls out on how dumb that is since it’s drawing everyone closer to the culprit. Itsuki also takes the right side and tells Fujimori to remember what was said to Samejima before (reveal the truth to clear the suspicions towards you).

Izumo is dumbfounded by this many people taking Fujimori’s side and Yodogawa replies that she is too much of narrow-minded amateur, clinging to only one piece of information instead of trying to think of new possibilities. She replies that there’s no evidence to clear Fujimori’s suspicion yet. Itsuki makes a “Fujimori, do something” speech, he thinks about the people who trust him right now and this starts a Debate Knock.

The Debate is a weird mix of Rebuttal Showdown and Debate Scrum. You have to cut your opponent’s words, but not your ally’s. The Ronpa point here is Todoroki saying no other place is suspicious and Fujimori shooting the girls’ locker room. Fujimori explains the signs that the push car was used and no one confesses to using it, so we conclude this is tied to the case. Now the suspect list is inverted, the girls are the potential culprits.

We’re back to the sequence of “not me”, this time with girls, with the usual sideshow of Himuro and Koga throwing hateful insults at each other. That’s all for this half of the trial. Next is my personal deduction.

Maiko is quite clearly the culprit. She killed Rokudou somewhere with the rope, took the push car, placed the body on it, tied the same rope to the push car, shoved it the locker room without entering, leaving the body half-shoved into the locker she tricked Samejima into opening and pulled the push car back to her with the rope. I’m confident in this theory.

#danganronpa re:birth #ayumu fujimori #misuzu aisaka #nico himuro #mikoto itsuki #kasumi izumo #maiko kagura #mitsunari koga #marin mizuta #narumi oosone #saiji rokudou #keigo sakuma #kazuomi samejima #aruma todoroki #akira tsuchiya #seishi yodogawa

53 notes · View notes

gocchisama · 7 years

Text

Nadeshiko Glass Cannon : Story of Hirate Yurina (平手友梨奈）

Today marks the day of Keyakizaka major debut. 6 April 2016, 20 girls were introduced to the press to become Nogizaka sister group. What kind of music they would produce, what kind of appeal they would develop to grow a fanbase, all was unknown. Among those girls stood a rather young and plain one, wearing a mushroom haircut. With a calm and poised speech, she declared her will to do her best on behalf of the group. Little did we know that she would become the unmovable center of Keyakizaka. The further we dove into her world, the more questions roses. Just who is Hirate Yurina? But this is precisely her appeal : this mysterious side of her. Fans wants to know more about her, and for each layer of her personality lifted, the more fascinating she become.

“Techi” comes from her name “hirate” (平手）and friendly suffixe “chan”. To make it more original, “Hirate-chan” became “Hiratechi” then “Techi”. Credit to @yurina46tento.

Prior to their first release, Silent Majority, there was roughly 2-3 months of introduction during “Keyakitte, Kakenai?” their regular variety show. Hirate isn’t the extrovert kind of girl, and started the series as very quiet and humble. This shyness is quite understandable after all, this is the first time most of the girls step into the idol world. You could catch sparkles of excitement from her when MC (Tsuchida & Sawabe) talked about japanese comedians (she’s fond of them), but overall she was just waiting for the two host to ask her questions and react from it. It can be seen as passive. Furthermore, her lack of reactivity encouraged Tsuchida to tease her in some extent. It is true that, at the beginning, Yurina was intimidated.

A girl whose hobby is to listen to music, who practice basketball as main club activity, and dislike haunted house. Techi’s profile is not what you could call uncommon. To be honest, with girls with unexpected skills like Horsemanship or past modeling work, Yurina comes pretty average. But is it really a rebuke? To be reserved makes the girls look cute and innocent (and thus explain why people want to tease them). Granted, she is not creating opportunities of wide laughter in the studio like Oda Nana or Ozeki Rika, but many times her airheadness brought comical situation and liven up the mood. For example, when doing the monomane of GO!Minagawa (a comedian) she was the only one who accompanied the move with his “sound” signature, making her embarassed.

The innocence of a 14 years old, makes her lovely. It could be just that, but fate was preparing a different path for her. TAKAHIRO-sensei, the main choregrapher of the group, had authority of the first senbatsu choice as he was in charge of Silent Majority dance. And while Techi ability to dance and facial expression weren’t outstanding, he felt Yurina’s strong feeling toward her dear Keyakizaka, and his intuition lead him to chose her as Keyakizaka first center. From there, early fans witnessed a change. The change.

“At crossroads brimming with people, where will you go? (Being washed away) Wearing the same clothes, wearing the same expression...”

Silent Majority, the first and most well known track of Keyakizaka. A rugged location, filled with an heavy atmosphere where girls in military outfits shout their opposition to a crooked society of hypocrite adults. This powerful message, needed the appropriate attitude to be conveyed accurately. Techi did better than that; she traded her feeble character and became an avatar of rebellion. Her grip exploding in strength, her stare you can’t escape from, and sharp moves made people forget she was only 14. Despite her discrete debut on Keyakitte, she turned out to be a formidable vessel to deliver the meaning of the song.

Was it thanks to an incredible amount of training? Sometime it’s about something else too. In Sekai ni wa Ai Shikanai, there was this particular shoot where the MV producer had to screen the girls at the Gymnasium, the choregraphy sequence in particular. While the girls started moving, Techi was remaining still, fixing her hands. “what is she doing?” he thought. Because she was supposed to move at the same time as the girls. And when asked, Techi said “i realized how grateful i was to be part of them, and wanted to picture it deep in my memories”. After consideration, the producer noticed that standing still when everyone else was moving, naturally created a focus on her. Also, her smile toward Yonetani nanami felt natural and expressed this very gratitude she talked about, making the scene soothing. He then decided to keep it.

If a song is bland and plain, to be cute or excellent in dancing won’t change anything. But when the song has the potential to be a tube, it’s important to choose someone who has the style/character that fits the song to release his full potential. Yurina has this particulary skill to “understand” a song. Listening the track over and over, feeling the emotion rushing in her mind, and finally embodying it. In Futari saison, each performance is different. Whenever she’s happy, and look at her comrades dearly, her dance will become lively. If she’s feeling down, her solo will have a tormented feeling on it.

“People often say they want to see the past me, but past is past, and all I can do now is now.” -Hirate Yurina

There’s a theory that seeks to explain why Yurina did so well as Silent Majority center. An answer to where she draws all her bottomless energy. In a song that express anger, rebellion and freedom, the best way to convey those feelings is to actually have lived it in the past. This theory rose when fans noticed that during Yurina’s “jibun history” (my story) instead of taking pictures of her younger self or family, she’d prefered to talk about her favorite comedian duos. To incarnate “the girl in the train”, people speculated her past hid somber events that caused this emptiness within her. All in all, the reason why she fits so much in songs about pain and suffering is simply because she’s hurt as well. What makes her want to run forward so much, if not to run from a painful past?

The truth is, i was also fascinated by this theory. I wanted to know Techi’s past. However, i also realized that adhering to this theory was also comforting myself in what i wanted Techi to be : the girl from the train. But Techi is Techi, and the gloomy girl from the Yamanotesen and her are two different person. Hirate Yurina has this burning desire to change because deep inside her, she wants to live a fulfilling life. And by that, it means to live any kind of experience, to the fullest. Her way to apprehend a song is the same way she apprehend her life : She lives it and grows from it. The Yurina during the first Silent majority performance is not the same Yurina during Kouhaku utagassen. The yurina from the past is not the same Yurina as now.

And this is striking at how we also perceive idols. Fans knows : Stereotypes picture the idol genre as sub-music making money out of girl’s cuteness and innocence over delusional single middle aged japanese men. But the truth is, Idols are just the reflect of mankind : girls who want to find their way, who they are, through a bumpy road with many obstacles along the way. Instead of crying over their fate, they work for a way out. Even if there’s no guaranteed success, even if it’s painful, the girls show lot of courage and move forward. Yurina, with all her workload, opportunities, and newfound nakamas, embrace everything to grow and get stronger. This courage inspire me to do my best. Supporting her, is like supporting myself. By being courageous facing the future, she became a great idol. By being herself, she became a great individual being.

“Backstage, Yurina is all lively and kiddy. But when the times come to perform, she switch on to Keyakizaka Ace. It gives me goosebumps” - Imaizumi Yui

Nadeshiko is an ancient japanese word for “loveable girl”. Glass canon is a gaming vocabulary that define someone with high attack/damage but weak defense. Yurina proved many times she had great mental resilience (able to perform 10 songs+ in ariake colosseum), although she also stated many times she doesn’t consider herself as “able” to perform as Keyakizaka unmovable center. A self criticism very severe, implying her power unleashed during performance lean on frailness of mind. She did thought of quitting, and with her young age, it can’t be helped to be inexperienced. A giant of paper, who risk of consuming itself if not able to manage his energy properly.

Center is a lonely place. Despite the light of the spotlight, the 0 position is actually a dark ceiling, where mistakes are prohibited, where there’s the most pressure. But I beg to differ, Keyakizaka is not all about Hirate Yurina. Those many hands bolstering her back, this warmth surrounding her, is what makes her keep going. Those experiences she mentioned earlier, are also meetings. Coming across her newfound nakamas changed her life. Moriya Akane with whom she can act like a spoiled child, Suzumoto Miyu with whom she can share her everyday life, and Nagahama Neru with whom she can confess her worries. Being around her friends, is also where Techi is in her most natural state. Her teammates put her at ease, as well as being fuel for doing her best.

Earlier we supposed Techi drew her energy from pain. My new theory, or faith, is that Techi draw her bottomless energy from gratitude. Even though she has been pro active to make things work, she always have this kind humility toward what the present brings to her, like american family who thanks God for the food. Doing her activities to the fullest, not wasting one bit of energy, is a way to express her gratitude toward the staff, her friends, and family. This is also Keyakizaka motto: humility, kindness, and bonds.

youtube

“She looks so serious and cool on Stage, but she did also pranked me when i was sleeping! And used a scooter in Handshake even though Staff forbid it! And...” - Suzumoto Miyu

There’s no “true” Yurina. No character, no fake attitude. The girl who entered Keyakizaka “in order to change”, like a diamond glass half-full, half-empty, has finally become whole by focusing on “becoming” instead of “being”. To follow Yurina, is like walking on a journey where each day is a surprise. Because we don’t know which Yurina will come up next. The 48group is about “Idols you can meet”. What if the secret motto is “idol you can see grow”? If that the case, Techi, from the very fiber of her being and will, incarnate those words.

A courageous girl, not naive but conscious, fragile but resolute, sometimes childish but always grateful. It isn’t this oversimplification where an Ace is a girl with perfect dance, singing or comical abilities. Techi has qualities and imperfection as well, but it’s how she faces it with a brave heart that makes her incredibly beautiful and interesting. All in all, her ability to absorb, convey, sublimate Keyakizaka46 songs justify her position of Ace. The potential of Yurina might look like exceptionnal, but is it really relevant, since what she’s only doing, is being herself? Maybe she just excels at... being human.

人間は面白い。

#Keyakizaka46 #欅坂46 #平手友梨奈 #hirate yurina #moriya akane #nagahama neru

222 notes · View notes

castielgurl · 7 years

Text

Don`t judge the book by it`s cover

Romanogers Appreciation Week 2017 Feb 9th

Prompt: Pancakes and freedom

Natasha is inspiring writer who looking for a producer to publish her book. She had gone to several companies, but nobody give her a chance. Until Clint her best friend who is a popular actor introduced her to his boss, CEO of Marvel Production Steve Rogers. She was thrilled but Rogers is not easy to please.

Natasha walks out from a huge office building Manhattan. She feels so angry, the company director not even give her a chance. He is not even looks at her manuscript. She was rejected by five companies. But she never gives up her dream to become a novel writer.

“You`re not talented”

“Your writing is dull and boring”

“Instead, why don`t we talk about your friend Clint Barton? Are you guys dating?”

This is all the script she heard every time she tries to submit her work. She waiting for a taxi until someone stole her taxi. Everything is a disaster for her. It`s end her day terribly.

Then she receive a call

“Hey Natalie”

“Clint how many times I told you don`t call me with that name!”

He is laughing

“Chill Nat. What are you doing?”

“I`m submit my script to DC production. They say I should look for another job.”

Clint is laughing again

“Nat, are you tried to send you work again? I thought you give up this a long time ago”

“Nope I never give up. I quit my job for this.”

“Ok. Do you need my help?”

Natasha face turns happy

“Oh my god Clint! You are going to help me?? Because I trying to ask for your help for whole year!”

“Sorry all right I`m very busy. So I will arrange the appointment with him tomorrow. 9.00 In morning. He hates someone late. Come to Marvel Production tomorrow and ask the secretary to met Mr. Rogers. Don`t fall for him”

Natasha giggles like a little girl. “Love you Clint”

Tomorrow she rides a public train wearing a flower dress to met Mr. Rogers.

The office is huge. It was nicely decorated. A brunette with long legs wearing a black suit welcomed her.

“My name is Maria Hill. I`m Mr. Rogers’s secretary. He will see you inside”

Steve Rogers CEO

Natasha nervously knocked the door.

“Come in!”

“Hello my name is Natasha Romanoff”

“Have a seat Miss Romanoff”

“Natasha”

“All right”

He not the way she imagined he was. Clint had told her about his boss. She never thought him so young and incredibly handsome. He was perfect in everywhere, tall frame, he had deep eyes, fair skin and lips that was so red, she wanted to kiss it. She always imagines Clint boss is old men with less hair, wearing huge glasses.

She shows him her script. And he read it. He turns pages to pages very quickly. He circles every word he did not like. His cringe hard when he read the last chapter. He put the script harshly on the table. He is not happy. Clearly.

“What are you trying to tell?”

“Is about a women who had terrible life and stranded in an island”

“You have no story to tell. I don`t know what should I call this. Your writing is a mess. Is all over the place!”

“I`m sorry, but I can fix this”

“You know what, I can offer a better option for you” He picks up the script and throw it to the trash can. She in shocked.

“That`s where it should belong. To the trash can”

Natasha never feels so humiliated in her life. Her face turns red. She is so angry. She doesn`t care if he is a CEO of whatever company.

“I put my whole year for that! You don`t understand! Of course you don`t understand! The only thing you know is torturing and downgrade people! You are snakes! Blood sucker!!” She picks a glass of water on the coffee table and throws it to him. She exhaled heavily when she sees his expensive suit gets wet. His face so red and he bites his lips so hard. He is angry, literally.

“Get out of my office. I don`t want to see your face anymore!” He said as he points at the door and pick a cloth to wipe his face.

The next day Clint calls her.

“You did what??” Clint sound disbelieve.

“That guy is jerking; I have no choice than to put him to the right place”

“Nat he can be very picky sometimes because he is the best in the industry. He really knows how to spot a talent. He an expert”

“Doesn`t mean he can humiliate me”

“I know, but, he is a good guy. Trust me. Come on I`m working so hard to get your appointment. He is a very busy man”

“He doesn`t want to see my face again”

“But he asks about you, and wants you to come back”

Tomorrow morning

She in his office again. But he is not mention anything about what happen yesterday. He keeps focusing checking her work. She managed to finish another manuscript last night. She wondering why on earth his giving her another chance after she throwing a glass of water? She could not stop herself from staring at his face. But he ignore her.

“Miss Romanoff I don`t know who is going to read about a women who meeting an alien after she trying to kill herself?”

“Some..Some people may be” She said nervously

“I am wondering where you got all this idea.”

“I live beside a beach, and I get it from my imagination”

He put a paper on the table

“People doesn`t want imagination, they wants reality”

“Why do people reading a novel? Because they could not have what is writing in the story”

“I`m telling you what, if you can`t accept critics you can`t stay in this industry”

“Critics aren`t bad unless they are unconstructive”

He sighed.

“But you want me to give you a chance or not?” Her eyes widened.

“If you are a good person, yes please”

“If you want to work, follow my rules. And if you can`t accept my critics you can leave this room. Now”

She grips the seat holder tightly.

“Ok. I won`t”

“Miss Romanoff met me at café just beside this office tomorrow morning. We are going to have breakfast every morning together until I satisfy with your work”

Natasha cannot believe what she just heard. Inside, she just wanted to scream.

“All right deal. Thank you Mr. Rogers” She almost squealed at the same time shakes his hand.

As she almost leaves the door. He said something

“Miss Romanoff. Tororrow 7 am. I hate people getting late”

“Yes, see you tomorrow”

“And…Miss Romanoff”

“Yes”

“I believe this belong to you?” He`s holding a purple lace thong. Extra panties that she always carries with her, in case you know emergency. She turns back to his table with a red blush on her cheek. Oh shit. Is this a reason why he calling her back?

“Uhmm. I am sorry”

He looks like he trying to holding a laugh.

“I don`t know if this is a hint of something else or. But I do love purple lace”

She can`t hold anymore, she just want to go back home and push her face into her pillow so hard. Because she never feels so embarrassing like now. She quickly pulls the panty from his fingers and speed up her steps.

“Thank you for keeping this for me” She runs quickly and leave. God, why does she do something so embarassing to the man that she just throw a drink yesterday?

Tomorrow begin a mission of Natasha Romanoff wins Steve Rogers heart. The first day he orders a pancakes. It was the best pancakes she ever had in her life. But she doesn`t love pancakes before.

The first day he said her story almost like stuck in the elevator with the people he hates the most and he rather jump to death than stuck with these people.

“Look at the women in orange skirt. She has an average weight, a slender figure. She carries a briefcase, and a file with her. It`s possible that she an accountant or secretary? But when you look at her file she carries very closely. A Grolier company. What is that suppose to mean?”

“She sells children books”

“You probably right, but look what happen next” There is a man with a suit to her and pick up a file and the suit case from the lady in orange.

“What? The salesman is her husband?”

“Keep watching” The man in suits looks like waiting for someone after the women in orange leave. Than another woman in red gown coming with a smile on her face and kiss the man in suits. Natasha mouth open wide.

“See if you keep your eyes open you can write a story. Describe people. And tell the reader about real people who got flaws and we always given a wrong assumption. Why don`t you write a story that you know and familiar with”

The next day is another pancake with a lot of berries and strawberries. She feels like she like pancakes more than she thought she would be. Her work by the way he describe as ‘Like cat fallen from New York Tower, with a strangled sound’

The third day she notice more about Steve Rogers. He wakes up very early, arrive at his office before everyone else, single, very tidy and clean. Every day he will order the same thing a strawberry and berry pancakes. Other than that he very picky and always want the best, rigid and strict with rules. He is a perfectionist. She never sees any family photo on his table or a girlfriend photo. Except there is a photo of him with a brunette man. A photo looks like he was in college graduation. They both look young and free. Is he dating someone? Or maybe he not interested in women. But his comment about her lace thong proves otherwise. And the way his stare at her bare legs too.

Another pancakes and a cup of coffees. He read carefully her script. This time he not showing any gesture like cringes so hard, or rubs his jaw or his neck.

“Well Miss Romanoff. This is good. Good enough” She wanted to jump right away if no people inside the café.

“I really like this character. A soldier who living in the past and wakes up 70 years later in modern world. And I like her too; a spy who had dark past tries to regain people trust by helping them. Their relationships are very interesting. Platonic but there is deep love inside but they are afraid to admit to each other. Is this character a fiction or?”

“They are inspired by my parents. My father is a soldier and my mother is the complete opposite of him.”

“Ok”

She is waiting if he going to say something. If he is going to sign a deal with her. She wanted to ask but she very nervous especially when he finally shows his real smile. He look free and being himself. She loves his smiles and she melting. She gulped. She picks a large piece of pancakes with a white cream and put in her mouth and swallowed.

“Emm… Miss Romanoff there is a cream on your mouth” He said while mimicked to shows her.

“huh? Where here?”

“No over there”

Her mouth full of pancakes she pick a cloth to wipe her face

“No. Let me” He instead wipe the cream on her lower lips with his fingers. Than the whole world stop for a while. His touch sends an electric to her body. Her heart beating fast like it going to explode. His ridicules long lash looking at her. He did not pull his fingers from her lips. So she kisses his finger, and staring at his blue eyes. He wipes the cream and tries to pull his fingers but she holds it with her hand and sucks his thumb. His eyes went darker. And he knows that she wants him as much he wants her too.

Something happen later. No not really.

His shift will start at 8 am. He left for work leaving her with a big question. What the hell she was doing? He never call or texted her today. She keeps waiting and waiting.

“I swear if you check your phone again, I will pour this hot coffee down your throat. You did it for a hundred times!!” Say her room mates Jane.

She sighed later she realize the reality he never ever interested in someone like her. She gets it. He is a rich man, handsome and perfect in everywhere. She and he would never work.

Later at night she heard her noise near her window. She can`t believe what she just saw. Is was him! Climbing her rented house at a 3 am!

“Steve?? What the hell are you” She not even finish her words because he kissing her. Like his life depends on her. They made love right away on her bed.

Tomorrow morning she wakes up and he`s not there. She gets up and takes a shower. Went to kitchen, but she was surprise by a huge bouquet of red roses. Not one, but they filled everywhere of her small living room. And there is card written

“Will you be my girlfriend? A date and pancakes 7 am and

by the way Is a DEAL”

Oh shit. She is going to be late.

#romanogers #stevenat #stevetasha #capwidow #romanogersweek #Steve Rogers #natasha romanoff

30 notes · View notes